#(but sometimes there isn’t. and there are people who have committed themselves to making sure he doesn’t have to acknowledge that)

[fortes-fortuna-iogurtum]

got into a convo with my family this morning that started with politics and philosophy and ended up spiraling into a rant about the nature of goodness and none of that is actually important eXCEPT that it reminded me of the ‘without hope without witness without reward’ quote and this all leads me to what I want to say which is—

I have realized that that line ^ is the standard by which I measure any portrayal of River Song. if there’s a story about her that doesn’t convince me that a) this is a person who could and would write that OR b) this is a person who can become the kind of person who writes that, then it’s not going to work for me.

[writeroutoftime]

flufftober day 2 - family, friends, loved ones

pairing: jamie tartt x reader

words: 0.7k

oOoOo

“Sometimes it feels like we’re never going to get married.” you lamented to Keeley and Rebecca as the three of you sat around Rebecca’s flat, sipping on wine with a trashy movie on in the background. 

Being engaged to one of the biggest, hotshot players in the league was not all it was cracked up to be. Just over a year ago, Jamie had gotten down on one knee and popped the question, but between your schedule and his, you were in a perpetual state of engagement. 

“Babes, it’ll all work out, I know it. But as long as the two of you know the commitment you want to make to each other, that’s all that matters, right?” Keeley reassured you, rubbing a soothing touch up and down your arm. 

“I suppose you're right.” 

“Of course she is.” Rebecca interjected. “My wedding to Rupert happened weeks after he proposed, cost a fortune, was a whole fucking affair turned out to be a pile of shit.” 

Though you and Keely tried to keep a straight face, you couldn’t help but burst out laughing at Rebecca’s mini rant, her eventually joining in. It made you feel a bit better, and the thought slowly began to dissipate from your mind. 

It wasn’t until two weeks later that you thought anything about your conversation with Keeley and Rebecca. You and Jamie had been called into the Dog Track, but neither of you were sure as to why. It was an off week for a match and a rare, free Saturday for the team to enjoy. 

The two of you walked into the building, hand in hand, only to be met with Keeley and Roy, with a huge grin and a half scowl on their faces respectively. 

“Finally!” Keeley cried, reaching to grab your hand and pull you away. Before Jamie could even protest, the blonde threw a quick “We’ll see you two later.” over her shoulder. 

All your questions went unanswered until Keeley pulled you into Rebecca’s office, where the room in question stood waiting with three glasses of champagne and a mischievous smile on her face. You glanced around the room, eyes narrowed in confusion until you spotted a dress hanging a ways away - a white dress. 

“Umm, guys, what’s going on?” 

The two women looked at each other before looking back at you. “Do you trust us?” Rebecca asked. 

oOoOo

Forty minutes later and you found yourself outside on the pitch, Jamie being led out by Roy and some of the other players. The two of you met in the middle and found Ted waiting there in a nice suit, and a cheesy grin on his face. 

“Hey, y’all,” Ted started. “I know this isn’t necessarily the big day you probably dreamed of, but we thought we’d throw you this little party. Now Beard here has gotten himself ordained and we’re all ready to perform a little ceremony so that one of our favorite couples can call themselves hitched.” he smiled, before rushing to add on “‘Course, you don’t have to go through with this. We don’t mean to overstep, just wanted to do something nice for you two.” 

You were stunned and overwhelmed by the love you felt from this team, and it was hard to stop the tears that pricked at the corner of your eyes. A huge grin overtook your features and you turned to look at your fiance, giving him a questioning look. Jamie looked towards his team, back at you, and smiled with the slightest nod. Both of you knew what your answer was. 

“We’d love to.” Jamie said and was quickly drowned out by the cheers of everyone waiting to hear your decision. 

You couldn’t help but laugh as Jamie was rushed down to the makeshift aisle with Beard while Keeley and Rebecca quickly walked down as your ‘bridesmaids,’ and Ted stood back with you offering you his arm. 

“Hope you don’t mind, but can I walk you down?” he asked. 

By that point, tears of joy and love were streaming down your face as you could only nod in response. It might not have been the ceremony you were expecting, but all that mattered was that you were surrounded by the people who loved you and you, finally, got to join your life with the man you loved. 

[mostlysignssomeportents]

"Open" "AI" isn’t

Tomorrow (19 Aug), I'm appearing at the San Diego Union-Tribune Festival of Books. I'm on a 2:30PM panel called "Return From Retirement," followed by a signing:

https://www.sandiegouniontribune.com/festivalofbooks

The crybabies who freak out about The Communist Manifesto appearing on university curriculum clearly never read it – chapter one is basically a long hymn to capitalism's flexibility and inventiveness, its ability to change form and adapt itself to everything the world throws at it and come out on top:

https://www.marxists.org/archive/marx/works/1848/communist-manifesto/ch01.htm#007

Today, leftists signal this protean capacity of capital with the -washing suffix: greenwashing, genderwashing, queerwashing, wokewashing – all the ways capital cloaks itself in liberatory, progressive values, while still serving as a force for extraction, exploitation, and political corruption.

A smart capitalist is someone who, sensing the outrage at a world run by 150 old white guys in boardrooms, proposes replacing half of them with women, queers, and people of color. This is a superficial maneuver, sure, but it's an incredibly effective one.

In "Open (For Business): Big Tech, Concentrated Power, and the Political Economy of Open AI," a new working paper, Meredith Whittaker, David Gray Widder and Sarah B Myers document a new kind of -washing: openwashing:

https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=4543807

Openwashing is the trick that large "AI" companies use to evade regulation and neutralizing critics, by casting themselves as forces of ethical capitalism, committed to the virtue of openness. No one should be surprised to learn that the products of the "open" wing of an industry whose products are neither "artificial," nor "intelligent," are also not "open." Every word AI huxters say is a lie; including "and," and "the."

So what work does the "open" in "open AI" do? "Open" here is supposed to invoke the "open" in "open source," a movement that emphasizes a software development methodology that promotes code transparency, reusability and extensibility, which are three important virtues.

But "open source" itself is an offshoot of a more foundational movement, the Free Software movement, whose goal is to promote freedom, and whose method is openness. The point of software freedom was technological self-determination, the right of technology users to decide not just what their technology does, but who it does it to and who it does it for:

https://locusmag.com/2022/01/cory-doctorow-science-fiction-is-a-luddite-literature/

The open source split from free software was ostensibly driven by the need to reassure investors and businesspeople so they would join the movement. The "free" in free software is (deliberately) ambiguous, a bit of wordplay that sometimes misleads people into thinking it means "Free as in Beer" when really it means "Free as in Speech" (in Romance languages, these distinctions are captured by translating "free" as "libre" rather than "gratis").

The idea behind open source was to rebrand free software in a less ambiguous – and more instrumental – package that stressed cost-savings and software quality, as well as "ecosystem benefits" from a co-operative form of development that recruited tinkerers, independents, and rivals to contribute to a robust infrastructural commons.

But "open" doesn't merely resolve the linguistic ambiguity of libre vs gratis – it does so by removing the "liberty" from "libre," the "freedom" from "free." "Open" changes the pole-star that movement participants follow as they set their course. Rather than asking "Which course of action makes us more free?" they ask, "Which course of action makes our software better?"

Thus, by dribs and drabs, the freedom leeches out of openness. Today's tech giants have mobilized "open" to create a two-tier system: the largest tech firms enjoy broad freedom themselves – they alone get to decide how their software stack is configured. But for all of us who rely on that (increasingly unavoidable) software stack, all we have is "open": the ability to peer inside that software and see how it works, and perhaps suggest improvements to it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vBknF2yUZZ8

In the Big Tech internet, it's freedom for them, openness for us. "Openness" – transparency, reusability and extensibility – is valuable, but it shouldn't be mistaken for technological self-determination. As the tech sector becomes ever-more concentrated, the limits of openness become more apparent.

But even by those standards, the openness of "open AI" is thin gruel indeed (that goes triple for the company that calls itself "OpenAI," which is a particularly egregious openwasher).

The paper's authors start by suggesting that the "open" in "open AI" is meant to imply that an "open AI" can be scratch-built by competitors (or even hobbyists), but that this isn't true. Not only is the material that "open AI" companies publish insufficient for reproducing their products, even if those gaps were plugged, the resource burden required to do so is so intense that only the largest companies could do so.

Beyond this, the "open" parts of "open AI" are insufficient for achieving the other claimed benefits of "open AI": they don't promote auditing, or safety, or competition. Indeed, they often cut against these goals.

"Open AI" is a wordgame that exploits the malleability of "open," but also the ambiguity of the term "AI": "a grab bag of approaches, not… a technical term of art, but more … marketing and a signifier of aspirations." Hitching this vague term to "open" creates all kinds of bait-and-switch opportunities.

That's how you get Meta claiming that LLaMa2 is "open source," despite being licensed in a way that is absolutely incompatible with any widely accepted definition of the term:

https://blog.opensource.org/metas-llama-2-license-is-not-open-source/

LLaMa-2 is a particularly egregious openwashing example, but there are plenty of other ways that "open" is misleadingly applied to AI: sometimes it means you can see the source code, sometimes that you can see the training data, and sometimes that you can tune a model, all to different degrees, alone and in combination.

But even the most "open" systems can't be independently replicated, due to raw computing requirements. This isn't the fault of the AI industry – the computational intensity is a fact, not a choice – but when the AI industry claims that "open" will "democratize" AI, they are hiding the ball. People who hear these "democratization" claims (especially policymakers) are thinking about entrepreneurial kids in garages, but unless these kids have access to multi-billion-dollar data centers, they can't be "disruptors" who topple tech giants with cool new ideas. At best, they can hope to pay rent to those giants for access to their compute grids, in order to create products and services at the margin that rely on existing products, rather than displacing them.

The "open" story, with its claims of democratization, is an especially important one in the context of regulation. In Europe, where a variety of AI regulations have been proposed, the AI industry has co-opted the open source movement's hard-won narrative battles about the harms of ill-considered regulation.

For open source (and free software) advocates, many tech regulations aimed at taming large, abusive companies – such as requirements to surveil and control users to extinguish toxic behavior – wreak collateral damage on the free, open, user-centric systems that we see as superior alternatives to Big Tech. This leads to the paradoxical effect of passing regulation to "punish" Big Tech that end up simply shaving an infinitesimal percentage off the giants' profits, while destroying the small co-ops, nonprofits and startups before they can grow to be a viable alternative.

The years-long fight to get regulators to understand this risk has been waged by principled actors working for subsistence nonprofit wages or for free, and now the AI industry is capitalizing on lawmakers' hard-won consideration for collateral damage by claiming to be "open AI" and thus vulnerable to overbroad regulation.

But the "open" projects that lawmakers have been coached to value are precious because they deliver a level playing field, competition, innovation and democratization – all things that "open AI" fails to deliver. The regulations the AI industry is fighting also don't necessarily implicate the speech implications that are core to protecting free software:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2015/04/remembering-case-established-code-speech

Just think about LLaMa-2. You can download it for free, along with the model weights it relies on – but not detailed specs for the data that was used in its training. And the source-code is licensed under a homebrewed license cooked up by Meta's lawyers, a license that only glancingly resembles anything from the Open Source Definition:

https://opensource.org/osd/

Core to Big Tech companies' "open AI" offerings are tools, like Meta's PyTorch and Google's TensorFlow. These tools are indeed "open source," licensed under real OSS terms. But they are designed and maintained by the companies that sponsor them, and optimize for the proprietary back-ends each company offers in its own cloud. When programmers train themselves to develop in these environments, they are gaining expertise in adding value to a monopolist's ecosystem, locking themselves in with their own expertise. This a classic example of software freedom for tech giants and open source for the rest of us.

One way to understand how "open" can produce a lock-in that "free" might prevent is to think of Android: Android is an open platform in the sense that its sourcecode is freely licensed, but the existence of Android doesn't make it any easier to challenge the mobile OS duopoly with a new mobile OS; nor does it make it easier to switch from Android to iOS and vice versa.

Another example: MongoDB, a free/open database tool that was adopted by Amazon, which subsequently forked the codebase and tuning it to work on their proprietary cloud infrastructure.

The value of open tooling as a stickytrap for creating a pool of developers who end up as sharecroppers who are glued to a specific company's closed infrastructure is well-understood and openly acknowledged by "open AI" companies. Zuckerberg boasts about how PyTorch ropes developers into Meta's stack, "when there are opportunities to make integrations with products, [so] it’s much easier to make sure that developers and other folks are compatible with the things that we need in the way that our systems work."

Tooling is a relatively obscure issue, primarily debated by developers. A much broader debate has raged over training data – how it is acquired, labeled, sorted and used. Many of the biggest "open AI" companies are totally opaque when it comes to training data. Google and OpenAI won't even say how many pieces of data went into their models' training – let alone which data they used.

Other "open AI" companies use publicly available datasets like the Pile and CommonCrawl. But you can't replicate their models by shoveling these datasets into an algorithm. Each one has to be groomed – labeled, sorted, de-duplicated, and otherwise filtered. Many "open" models merge these datasets with other, proprietary sets, in varying (and secret) proportions.

Quality filtering and labeling for training data is incredibly expensive and labor-intensive, and involves some of the most exploitative and traumatizing clickwork in the world, as poorly paid workers in the Global South make pennies for reviewing data that includes graphic violence, rape, and gore.

Not only is the product of this "data pipeline" kept a secret by "open" companies, the very nature of the pipeline is likewise cloaked in mystery, in order to obscure the exploitative labor relations it embodies (the joke that "AI" stands for "absent Indians" comes out of the South Asian clickwork industry).

The most common "open" in "open AI" is a model that arrives built and trained, which is "open" in the sense that end-users can "fine-tune" it – usually while running it on the manufacturer's own proprietary cloud hardware, under that company's supervision and surveillance. These tunable models are undocumented blobs, not the rigorously peer-reviewed transparent tools celebrated by the open source movement.

If "open" was a way to transform "free software" from an ethical proposition to an efficient methodology for developing high-quality software; then "open AI" is a way to transform "open source" into a rent-extracting black box.

Some "open AI" has slipped out of the corporate silo. Meta's LLaMa was leaked by early testers, republished on 4chan, and is now in the wild. Some exciting stuff has emerged from this, but despite this work happening outside of Meta's control, it is not without benefits to Meta. As an infamous leaked Google memo explains:

Paradoxically, the one clear winner in all of this is Meta. Because the leaked model was theirs, they have effectively garnered an entire planet's worth of free labor. Since most open source innovation is happening on top of their architecture, there is nothing stopping them from directly incorporating it into their products.

https://www.searchenginejournal.com/leaked-google-memo-admits-defeat-by-open-source-ai/486290/

Thus, "open AI" is best understood as "as free product development" for large, well-capitalized AI companies, conducted by tinkerers who will not be able to escape these giants' proprietary compute silos and opaque training corpuses, and whose work product is guaranteed to be compatible with the giants' own systems.

The instrumental story about the virtues of "open" often invoke auditability: the fact that anyone can look at the source code makes it easier for bugs to be identified. But as open source projects have learned the hard way, the fact that anyone can audit your widely used, high-stakes code doesn't mean that anyone will.

The Heartbleed vulnerability in OpenSSL was a wake-up call for the open source movement – a bug that endangered every secure webserver connection in the world, which had hidden in plain sight for years. The result was an admirable and successful effort to build institutions whose job it is to actually make use of open source transparency to conduct regular, deep, systemic audits.

In other words, "open" is a necessary, but insufficient, precondition for auditing. But when the "open AI" movement touts its "safety" thanks to its "auditability," it fails to describe any steps it is taking to replicate these auditing institutions – how they'll be constituted, funded and directed. The story starts and ends with "transparency" and then makes the unjustifiable leap to "safety," without any intermediate steps about how the one will turn into the other.

It's a Magic Underpants Gnome story, in other words:

Step One: Transparency

Step Two: ??

Step Three: Safety

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5ih_TQWqCA

Meanwhile, OpenAI itself has gone on record as objecting to "burdensome mechanisms like licenses or audits" as an impediment to "innovation" – all the while arguing that these "burdensome mechanisms" should be mandatory for rival offerings that are more advanced than its own. To call this a "transparent ruse" is to do violence to good, hardworking transparent ruses all the world over:

https://openai.com/blog/governance-of-superintelligence

Some "open AI" is much more open than the industry dominating offerings. There's EleutherAI, a donor-supported nonprofit whose model comes with documentation and code, licensed Apache 2.0. There are also some smaller academic offerings: Vicuna (UCSD/CMU/Berkeley); Koala (Berkeley) and Alpaca (Stanford).

These are indeed more open (though Alpaca – which ran on a laptop – had to be withdrawn because it "hallucinated" so profusely). But to the extent that the "open AI" movement invokes (or cares about) these projects, it is in order to brandish them before hostile policymakers and say, "Won't someone please think of the academics?" These are the poster children for proposals like exempting AI from antitrust enforcement, but they're not significant players in the "open AI" industry, nor are they likely to be for so long as the largest companies are running the show:

https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=4493900

I'm kickstarting the audiobook for "The Internet Con: How To Seize the Means of Computation," a Big Tech disassembly manual to disenshittify the web and make a new, good internet to succeed the old, good internet. It's a DRM-free book, which means Audible won't carry it, so this crowdfunder is essential. Back now to get the audio, Verso hardcover and ebook:

http://seizethemeansofcomputation.org

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/08/18/openwashing/#you-keep-using-that-word-i-do-not-think-it-means-what-you-think-it-means

Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg

CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en

[operationslipperypuppet]

Do you have any Jains headcanons going off of Murph’s comments about her possibly having an estranged wife or an ex?

Slight smorgasbord that’s a bit of this and a bit more generalized Jaina because I’m obsessed with her.

When they start to rebuild Irondeep, she makes sure Gemma gets a proper grave site, slightly elaborate, and next to their mother. She also makes sure that the circumstances of her sister’s death, that their father was the one at fault, circulate. She makes sure that next to no one remembers Hardwon was a witness. He’ll remember that enough for the rest of them.

She also makes sure that her father never receives a memorial, or any sort of official grave. MacGannis agrees the moment she asks, and she adds that to the list of why she considers herself indebted to him. Eventually, some of her shittier cousins privately fund establishing one in the most expensive private cemetery. Before she can pull papers on getting rid of it through official channels, it is smashed. They rebuild, and the second one is smashed faster. There isn’t a third attempt. Jaina wonders, for a while, how Hardwon could have pulled that off, when to her knowledge he didn’t know about it, and he hadn’t been seen in Irondeep for months. The next time she sees Nerman, however, he gives her a knowing nod. They can both tell themselves it’s about respect. But she understands him loud and clear. When Hardwon asks for capable warriors to travel to the Astral Plane with him, she makes sure Nerman’s name is at the top of the list.

Jaina finds romance easier earlier in life, when she’s focused on being a warrior, when people aren’t exactly looking to her for leadership. Nothing ever quite sticks, the women she falls for tend to want more attention than she’s able to give, and don’t understand that her priorities have always been the same place. So nothing really lasted, to her chagrin.

She did, however, have a hell of a time with Apple Scrumper at Bev and Erlin’s wedding.

There was one woman, once. Another warrior, someone with the same priorities as her. Or so she thought. They had a beautiful time in the Astral Plane, happy and fighting, not caring about anything but what was in front of them. It was her longest relationship ever. But the thing about falling for someone who spends as much time on the front lines of a war as they did is that sometimes, terrible things can happen. And that’s when Jaina decided to return to Irondeep, to commit to saving her city and her family name.

When Hardwon dropped off the Kingshammer for her, she left it exactly where he had dropped it for 6 months. She never wanted that hammer. Least of all like that. She finally decided to pick it up and put it away after stubbing her toe on it one too many times. The second she did, she felt something asking her to let it free from the hammer. Unthinking, she complied. And saw her sister for the first time in centuries. “I’m proud of you, J. You’re actually doing it”. Ghosts don’t cry often, but Gemma did, then. And so did Jaina. She felt comforted by the presence of the hammer after that. She didn’t use it to talk to Gemma again, but felt better knowing she was nearby. It rejuvenated her efforts at destroying her shitty family members.

[nimhrudd]

Welcome Home A.R.G Crackcanons

Wally definitely feigns innocence because he’s the main character who has to “learn” with the audience

It’s canon that he thinks he’s handsome and enjoys admiring himself in the mirror, so he 100% knows about the simps and is super smug about it

With his soft voice and gentle demeanor, he really fits the “darling” reputation

Despite this, I do genuinely believe he’s a good person and means the best. My personal theory is that Home is manipulating Wally in some way to do their bidding.

(I picture Wally being manipulated by Home is a euphemism for paternal manipulation and depression. But that’s just a theory. A GAME THEORY-)

He strikes me as someone that everyone WANTS to be submissive, but is actually a very dominant

Barnaby and Frank have a SpongeBob-Squidward relationship

Barnaby goes out of his way to annoy Frank

Frank can respect the effort, but would never admit it

Barnaby calls Frank “Frankfurter” much to Frank’s dismay

Barnaby is Sans from UnderTale I don’t make the rules

A very easy-going, morally grey kinda guy. Super chill person who’s always down to have a good time.

He rarely gets embarrassed or flustered. Nothing really catches him off guard

Except anything having to do with romance. If someone flirts with him his brain short-circuits

Which is funny considering he’s definitely one to flirt with someone jokingly

He gives everyone in town unique nicknames

Barnaby has a lovely singing voice. He mostly enjoys singing jazz. But mostly he sticks to stand-up comedy

Howdy is Barnaby’s biggest fan

Howdy has control over the store radio and whenever there are no customers, he turns on hardcore rock. But you’d never know because he wears the same smile no matter the situation

You’d think that with all those legs that Howdy would be a klutz. On the contrary, he’s quite elegant and light-footed

Julie isn’t a klutz either, but she’s super forgetful. Head-in-the-clouds kinda person

Despite this, she always remembers the tiniest details about the most random things (ADHD lookin’ ah)

She’s definitely someone to collect rocks that she thinks are cool or feel nice on her hands

Her love language is touch but she hates being touched without permission

This leads to a few disputes between herself and Frank

Frank is the opposite tho. He acts like he hates being touched but he’s touchstarved

The only people allowed to touch him are Eddie and Julie

Sometimes Barnaby tries to touch Frank in subtle ways just to annoy him. (Such as noogying his head or poking his sides)

Frank LOVES bouncy, squishy stuff. It just scratches his brain just right

On the other hand, he HATES stuff that sticks to him.

For example, I imagine he’d be head over heels at the discovery of oobleck but would steer clear of glitter or anything that clings with static electricity

Because of the mentioned above, Frank has a VERY specific taste in clothing. He just hates the feel of certain fabrics

Knew he was in love with Eddie when the mailman was running to him happily, mail in hand, only to trip and face plant in the mud. Despite this, Eddie didn’t stop smiling

Himbo makes tsundere heart go brrrr

Neither one confessed to each other for AGES so Julie took it upon herself to put them into awkward situations

Cue Poppy “intervening”

Speaking of Poppy, she’s the resident mom-friend. Makes sure everyone’s taking care of themselves physically and emotionally

Despite this she always forgets to take care of herself

Poppy is SUCH a proud LGBT+ mom. Her house is a safe haven for the gays. I don’t make the rules

She’s a tall, elegant, lady, so she swoons at gentle ladies trying to sweep her off her feet

Literally such a sweetheart I love Poppy

Whereas Frank knows all the technical and sensical facts, Poppy is more worldly and wise. She’s been around the coop, so to speak

Im convinced Poppy knows everything about EVERYONE and spreads gossip just for the benefit of her neighbors

(For example she spread rumors that Frank was going to her house to get an engagement ring for Eddie. This wasn’t true, but it lead to both Frank AND Eddie barging into her house for an explanation. She simply placed two cups of tea and a tray of cookies and left them alone in the living room)

Barnaby likes to call her “Cupid” because of this

Poppy always shows up to one of her Neighbor’s events, whether it’s a show for Barnaby or a casting call for Sally

Sally loves the support of peacock mom

Sally writes all her own plays, but makes money by sending in her own transcripts under a pen name

She’s actually very famous under her pen name and is torn between revealing herself to the world and staying mysterious

Sally decides to remain anon so that she can focus on her acting

Spent years in the night sky, watching all the people in town and all their shenanigans. Many years passed before she could work up the courage to come down to introduce herself

Incredible actress, but she has social anxiety and is much calmer outside of a play

Adversely, once she’s got an idea, she’s ALL IN. All her brain cells go into that ONE project or idea, and she ends up dragging everyone along with her. A one track mind, if you will

Sally always casts herself as the lead, but if there are any other main characters or main antagonists she ALWAYS casts Wally to play the part

This low-key offends Barnaby, because he loves a good villain and always wants to play the part of antagonist

Sally always asks Julie to help her make the backdrops

All of the neighbors have fears of some sort, except for Wally

It’s kind of freaky that he never seems to give people the reaction their looking for

But ye Wally has emotions, he’s just INCREDIBLE at masking them

Wally loves eye contact because he believes that eyes are the window to the soul

It’s also an assertiveness thing but no one would ever guess cuz of his cutesy face

Wally def has a staring problem but smooth-talks his way out of any awkward situation that could come from it

Wally is demisexual. Though he loves people easily in the friendly sense, it takes a LONG time for him to fall for someone romantically. But once he does, it’s over for his love interest cuz he’ll become clingy AF

Barnaby is the opposite. He’s very in tune with his emotions and knows immediately when he likes someone. He just chooses to avoid the crap out of them as soon as he realizes. He just gets too embarrassed. I personally headcanon him as asexual

Julie is genderfluid and very similar to Wally. Though she isn’t demi, she loves all kinds of people equally. So it just takes a minute for her to decipher whether or not she loves someone NORMALLY or MORE than a friend.

Poppy is a classy lady who’s looking for a fellow lady to spend her life with. Since she’s got some experience, she’d probably take pride in playing the waiting game. Some subtle touches here, some lingering eye contact there… it’s a slow burn ladies and gents.

Frank is someone who prefers men (specifically Eddie. Good thing the feelings mutual.) likes his men dumb and well meaning.

Eddie prefers men as well. Specifically men who are serious and well read.

Howdy is pansexual, but isn’t really looking for a relationship due to his business.

Sally feels kinda like another asexual to me. But she’d like to be in a relationship with a friend. Like get married and share a life together without all the romancey stuff

Julie and Frank both have the same love language - physical touch. But in different ways as said earlier

Frank also prefers Acts of Service, like Howdy

Poppy enjoys gift giving

Sally and Barnaby enjoy words of affirmation

Wally is a casual Quality Time enjoyer

[samcoesclub]

Get to know my OC

thanks so much 2 @silurisanguine for tagging me! i’m sure most of you guys have been tagged so anyone that sees this and wants to do it can consider themselves tagged by me

Fandom: Starfield

Role: Spacefarer

cw for mentions of aurora use (not by character)

Basics

Full Name: Indiana (Coe) - never had a last name prior to marrying Sam.

Nickname(s): Indy, not so affectionately called many other names by Spacers by virtue of all the bounties he’s cashed in on

Pronouns: He/Him

Sexuality: Bisexual

Occupation and Titles: Bounty Hunter as soon as he acquired his first ship (and probably before that, when he was just operating on Neon, but it isn’t quite the same). Explorer and Occasional Bounty Hunter once he joins up with Constellation

Birthday and Age: He doesn’t know his birthday, and he’s never celebrated it. His mom was always too out of her mind to remember, if she ever knew in the first place, but he loved her anyways. He always just counted it as turning a new age with the new year.

He’s 29 when the events of the game start, 30 by the time he and Sam get married

Physical Description: 6’ 1”, not super muscular but definitely built. Tattoo across his face along with the burn scars from the fire that killed his mom

Clothing Style: Loose jackets and cyberpunk tops, but when working outside on his ship or lounging, tanktop and loose pants. Before he left Neon, he’d always donned more cyberpunk-esque gear (a la cyberware streetwear), but once he left the city and made it into space, more Space Rogue attire

Background

Neon Street Rat, Wanted, Spaced

Before he was a crate rat turned to the streets, he had a family—a mom that loved him even if she loved the Aurora just as much after his dad, her husband, got shot. The fire in the underbelly that spread to the sleepcrate he’d saved money from stealing and scrounging and begging to help his mother buy took her life and marred his face.

After the fire, people on the street told him it hurt to look at him—oftentimes with a sneer, so he covered his face for years, sleeping under awnings and tents in Ebbside and the underbelly. He tried working an honest job, but nowhere would hire a kid off the street, so the easiest thing was to sell his soul for credits. A local bounty hunter, taking out Neon targets? Certainly. A vigilante to a certain extent? Also possible. (He would tell himself that all of these people were bad. They all committed crimes. They all had crossed the wrong people. It would sometimes make him feel better. Most times it wouldn’t. But it was what he was good at, and after a while, he got used to killing or taking marks in).

Scrounging and saving credits from Neon jobs, he finally got enough for a ship, some better weapons, and supplies to get the hell out of Neon as soon as his local notoriety became almost too much. He couldn’t be a ghost where the light penetrates.

And after he got out of Neon, Spacers hated his guts. The Crimson Fleet hated his guts. They came to know his MO.

He’s been hunting through space for nearing 12 years when he hears about a job, someone posing as a miner, but they can’t be sure who. It’s a big payout. Maybe if he does this job, he can stop killing for a while—stop hunting. A pipedream. It’s all he’s ever been good at. He’s never tried much else.

His quarry becomes the luckiest person alive when he gets zapped by the artifact.

Combat and Skills

Preferred Fighting Style: Start the engagement from far out, push in when he’s picked off the outside combatants. His love for anything with a scope makes this best

Favorite weapon: Anything with a scope

Special skills: Ballistic weapons, piloting, reading to become competent at something quickly, and apparently very good at doing voices when he reads out loud—so much so that Cora makes him and Sam split reading duties

Relationships

Family: Parents are dead, and prior to Constellation, he drifted through space mostly alone. But he’s happy to say he considers Constellation his family.

Love interest: Sam Coe

Best friend: Andreja 🐍 they understand each other on a molecular level

art by jazz.medic on ig 💞🫶

[blasphemecel]

Angel Devil — Fast Cars

PAIRING: Angel Devil/Reader WORD COUNT: 1.4k TYPE: Angst WARNING(S): SPOILERS, Implied drug abuse, alcoholism and sex NOTE: Clichember Prompt 7: Goodbye Kiss. The end of the event.

Angel doesn't like thinking, much less drawing parallels or recognizing patterns, but sometimes he realizes Hayakawa Aki is a little like you.

Actually, he prefers not to think about you at all, but Aki just does those things that make it obvious he has little regard for his life and he has to. And sometimes Angel thinks this profession is all about watching other people burn themselves up and then lose all importance when the smoke clears. Though maybe it's easy to think that, for him, anyway, because he doesn't get much work done at all.

On second thought, Aki isn't like you at all. He's such a nag, and all he cares about is work and following whichever direction Makima yanks his collar in like a well-groomed lapdog. Sure, sometimes he buys him ice cream to bribe him into pulling his weight (because Angel doesn't want to entertain the idea a human would do anything for him without expecting something in return), but you barely give a shit about work.

Usually work would be an excuse for you to fuel your adrenaline seeking tendencies, and maybe you're more of a fiend than Angel is. When he was your buddy, it was like this: you'd let him lounge around and not do anything at all, but then you'd drag him into some kind of exhausting scheme. He supposes that this is life’s way of balancing everything, though.

He doesn't like you most of the time, or so he says. But sometimes he was sitting on the back of a motorcycle, and you were the one riding (you used to have one, but it caught fire one of the five times you faced off against the PowerPoint Presentation Devil with him, and then you whined about how paying to get it fixed would compromise your funds for that thing he watched you snort off tables you loved so much when the two of you lived together, and then you resorted to 'borrowing' random civilians' motorcycles, and-), and it would be dark out and he didn't need to think about anything at all because you were driving, and the only thing he felt was the breeze blowing through his hair. In those moments, he found he likes you maybe the tiniest bit, but he never told you that.

Your apartment is a disgusting wreck. He remembers a growing pile of dirty dishes in the sink, but most times you forgot to eat so you didn't have any incentive to wash them either, and he didn't do it because he didn't want to. That brand of ice cream you like to buy from the supermarket has a nice package, anyway, so Angel never washed the dishes.

You have a pile of shitty action flicks that you rent and seldom return, too, and sometimes when he'd watch them with a blank look on his face, he wondered if you felt like the main character in them. Outside of committing large-scale grand theft auto — never punished because you're a Devil Hunter and if Devil Hunters won't go out and die, who will? — you don't have many talents, but you like to ramble a lot as if you have something worthwhile to say and Hayakawa Aki just isn't like that. He doesn’t open his mouth much, but when he does, it is intriguing.

Angel was there when you were pursuing The Clown Devil. It was a car you borrowed that time, and he was in the backseat, and he knows you were speeding and that you passed a few red lights, but he was staring out the window and not thinking about anything in particular. Then, after a few near accidents you did crash the car right into the building you were supposed to be at and you said it was because you were going so fast when you hit the brakes the car just didn't stop, but Angel knows you like drifting and fire and the excitement of near-death. You like other rushes, too.

He was fine because of course he was, but you dislocated your shoulder when you fell out and the window broke and some glass shards stuck to your cheek, but you gave him the grin of a selfish lunatic — which you are — and then you asked, "Wasn't that cool?!" like a giddy child as the vehicle went up in flames.

He grunted something because you throw tantrums when people ignore you.

And, yeah, you got a bunch of other injuries during the fight, but Angel was fine and he didn't lift a finger, so it shouldn't have mattered. Then after that was dealt with, you said a bunch of other worthless things like, "I want to see the demon of AIDs," "The Naruto run is a level four sex move, if you even care," "By the way, have you been eating all the ice cream? For a few months now I thought I was just hallucinating going to the store and buying it every day, but I dunno anymore..." "Sometimes, when I wipe my nose, a little fart comes out. And some of my snot has sugar in it," among other things that didn't warrant a response. 

Of course, this was all happening while driving the broken, burning car back to your place because apparently you thought that made you a badass. When he was in a more charitable mood, he would entertain you with one-two-word answers while feigning annoyance, but that day he wasn't. So he didn't.

Actually, that day he didn’t speak to you at all, which led you to saying another onslaught of dumb things like, "Are you mad cuz I didn't buy ice cream?" and "Your disgusting fucking hair is blocking the drain again. I'm not a plumber," but then you pouted and made puppy eyes when he didn't answer.

When you got bored with trying to trick him into replying, you stood up to occupy yourself with something else, and Angel said, "You're going to die tomorrow."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes. You have less than twenty-four hours left."

When he said that, Angel didn't know what you would die of exactly. There were always your antics, but there was also that you were at risk of liver failure because of your excessive drinking. You dragged him to your favorite bar a lot, and you always acted bizarre when you were drunk and admitted to the most embarrassing things, like being in love with him. 

Or maybe you'd overdose.

You stretched like a cat and said, "It's been fun." You didn't sound happy, but you weren't sad about it either.

The reason you died ended up not being one that he theorized, though, because the next day it was business as usual. He was on the back of a motorcycle and you knew that the Spider Devil would kill you. And it did not stop you from speeding or from pretending to know acrobatics.

So, you were bleeding out, and it was pretty obvious help wouldn't get there on time, considering what he announced last night.

"C'mon, let's make out."

"What? Stop thinking with your nether regions."

"I'm gonna die anyway, so," you persuaded.

"It's too much work."

He did, you know? He kissed you, but you must've died the moment his lips pressed against yours, and he pulled away immediately because prolonging it would've been revolting.

Angel wondered how you would've kissed him if you had gone for it when you had more time. If you would've done that repulsive tonguing thing he knew you liked to do with those prostitutes from the Red Light District you loved to bring around, and if you would've touched him, and if you would've grabbed his ass, or if that was a ritual reserved for other humans. That was usually his reason for popping in an action movie, but you were kind of sick in the head, so you didn't care he was there and he was kind of worse, so he didn't mind watching you.

He expected it to be a bigger deal. Not that anyone had a reason to miss you, but because you seemed to be the biggest hemorrhoid in the world's ass and now you’re gone, and it’s like you didn't exist at all. There are no dried up flowers on your grave, just the corpses of mice and overgrown weeds, so he knows he's the only one who visits.

In the end, though, Aki is just like you. Dead.

And maybe it's time to accept it.

First, though, he needs to go see Makima. She had said she needed him for something.

__

You know that feeling when sometimes you're complacent in a loved one's self destruction but they also kind of had it coming anyway?

[tea-with-evan-and-me]

‘Taxi cab theory is BS and an excuse. And sometimes I feel like it’s used to make us feel better. Men fall in love with who they fall in love with. They’re wired so differently. He didn’t want you (or me), he wanted her. It’s just how it is. 💔 Also Sex and the City is so unrealistic and toxic and has the worst advice for women. I wouldn’t take anything said on that show as good/real advice 😬’

im the OP about ‘taxi cab theory’, and it seems people (not exactly only this anon directly) didn’t get it right. it wasn’t anything about nat specifically or something against her, when i was talking about this theory, it was about men and their behavior. because i personally came across such situations in real life, unfortunately. and it wasn’t more about ‘sex in the city’, because i didn’t watch it at all, – it’s about different styles of thinking between men and women. i would not want nat to participate in such theory for real, – it was overall ‘meh’ about men in general, who live like this theory. and it makes me sad. and i don’t want it to be true and think evan just as the same man as others, but i mean… he’s still a man, unfortunately. but no one knows him except himself. so i just hope he isn’t the next example of this theory. hope this helped…❤️

hey anon, i think you may have actually misunderstood anon and others sentiment 😭 i wanna be clear i don’t think any of us felt you were speaking against natalie at all! i respect your feelings and i can certainly understand why you may feel this way.

the entire premise of the cab theory is based off of women’s perception of what men think/feel, as well as what women are deemed “quality partners” vs “just the first woman they met after becoming commitment-ready”. in order for the theory to be true, you have to believe that men are selecting life partners/spouses based on availability, and proximity to said man being ready and wanting to commit, as opposed to the women he had dated before who appeared to be a good match. this is largely a concept and statement women make to comfort themselves about not being “chosen” by a man they feel they technically checked all the boxes for. basically, he just “wasn’t ready”.

example of this i made up to illustrate: i was wife material, me and that man dated for 10 years and broke up because he wasn’t willing to marry and have kids with me! now, just ONE year after we broke up, he met a woman and within 6 months is engaged with plans to have kids! guess he’s finally ready and chose the first woman he met.

sure, we can say the taxi cab theory applies here, but the more likely and sadly, far more painful scenario here is that he was probably never interested in marrying that woman he dated for a decade, never interested in building a family with her. she was just a safe, comfortable placeholder until he met a better option or was in a position to leave and maintain his comfortable way of life. it’s not as much about being “ready” as it is about meeting the right person. i think men do this far more often than women do, at least in my observations. it affects women more deeply because women live on a biological timeline to create a family if they want one - men don’t have this problem. they can string a woman along for 20 years, leave her, and go make a family with a new young woman whenever they feel like it. men don’t get stuck and then say “i gave my entire life to that woman and now have to rush to build a family or it won’t happen for me”. the lack of honesty and transparency is the problem and the perpetrator here, not the taxi cab theory. either way: men ain’t shit.

[arcxnumvitae]

M.yers-B.riggs

ISTJ-T: Logistician

People with the ISTJ personality type (Logisticians) mean what they say and say what they mean, and when they commit to doing something, they make sure to follow through. With their responsible and dependable nature, it might not be so surprising that ISTJ personalities also tend to have a deep respect for structure and tradition. They are often drawn to organizations, workplaces, and educational settings that offer clear hierarchies and expectations.

While ISTJs may not be particularly flashy or attention seeking, they do more than their share to keep society on a sturdy, stable foundation. In their families and their communities, people with this personality type often earn respect for their reliability, their practicality, and their ability to stay grounded and logical in even the most stressful situations.

People with the ISTJ personality type believe that there is a right way to proceed in any situation – and that anyone who pretends otherwise is probably trying to bend the rules to suit their own desires. Consequently, they rarely hesitate to take responsibility for their actions and choices. They are quick to own up to their mistakes, admitting the truth even if it doesn’t make them look good or if it makes other people uncomfortable. To ISTJ personalities, honesty and straightforward communication are far more important than showmanship. They’d rather satisfy their own conscience than lie to impress someone else.

ISTJ personalities are also known for striving to meet their obligations no matter what. And they are often baffled by people who fail to hold themselves to the same standard. They can sometimes unfairly misjudge people who don’t match their rigorous self-control – suspecting that someone is being lazy or dishonest when that person might actually be coping with other challenges. While this can sometimes make ISTJ personalities appear rigid or unempathetic, their judgment often stems from their unwavering commitment to reliability and structure.

Romantic Relationships

Blind dates and random hookups are not the preferred methods that ISTJ personalities use for finding potential partners. The risk and unpredictability of these situations has their alarm bells ringing, and being dragged out for a night of dancing at the club isn’t going to happen without some serious reservations.

ISTJs much prefer more responsible, conservative methods of dating, such as dinner with an interested coworker or, in their more adventurous moods, a setup organized through a mutual friend. Their ideal dates will almost always include something that is familiar to these personalities, like going out to eat at their favorite restaurant. Anything outside of what is expected can cause ISTJs to feel stressed or uncomfortable – two things that don’t tend to nurture romance.

People with the ISTJ personality type approach relationships, as with most things, from a rational perspective, looking for compatibility and the mutual satisfaction of daily and long-term needs. This isn’t a process that they take lightly, and once commitments are established, they stick to their promises to the very end. ISTJ personalities establish foundations, fulfill their responsibilities, and keep their relationships functional and stable.

However, emotional satisfaction can be another matter. While ISTJs are able to provide surprisingly good emotional support, this only happens when they realize that it’s necessary. People with this personality type are not naturally receptive to others’ emotions, not unless they are stated clearly, and a partner usually only says “I’m angry” when it’s too late to address the initial grievance.

[icestarphoenix]

'Florida''s Games

'Florida' has theoretically existed for centuries, and during that length of time comes the terrifying notion that he can get bored. Here are some of the games and activities he concocted to entertain himself.

Dropped off wanderers into Run For Your Life! and made bets to see how long they last.

Even if the victim makes it all the way to the end, ‘Florida’ will teleport them out right before they reach the door to make sure that they’ll always be able to play again.

As ‘Florida’ is an entity and not human, he bypasses the one instance per wanderer rule and can watch with some friends.

He has played this game with Greg too. He made it about two kilometers before ‘Florida’ had to bail him out. The “state” seemed to be pretty disappointed.

Teleported hostile entities in front of people to watch them fight to the death. ‘Florida’ sometimes lets them go if it’s the human that wins.

He doesn’t always make the matchup fair, especially for the human. He might teleport someone so that one of their limbs is clipped into a wall or the floor to give them a challenge.

‘Florida’ might also forgo including entities entirely and have wanderers pitted against each other instead.

Pushed people into the range of Entity 104 and watched what happened.

‘Florida’ does this often with other entities or hazardous areas too. You better pray a person with a bucket hat isn’t nearby when exploring a dangerous place, as you might just become his next toy to throw at a wall.

Frequently crashes Partygoer events in Level Fun. He’s pretty infamous among the Partygoers for this, so they stay away from him and try to keep themselves in his good graces.

Has thrown quite a few things into the Void for fun. Almond Water, furniture, entities, wanderers, food, ‘Florida’ chucks them all into the Void to see if anything fun happens. 

He has tried to keep Hounds as pets. A past “staff member” did meet their end when ‘Florida’ held the leash just a little too loose. He’s also tried to “raise” a Hound from its youth by taking a poor wanderer and creating one himself.

Level 6.1 has the effect of pacifying him and preventing him from committing more violent acts, but that doesn’t stop ‘Florida’ from going around and causing chaos.

He’ll band together with child Facelings and run around to pull pranks and steal from human wanderers.

‘Florida’ and ‘Louisiana’ may go on binges and compete to see who can consume more food. ‘Loui’ always wins these contests, but the losers are always the overworked staff trying to keep up with the two of them.

NOTE: Food from Level 6.1 does not contribute to a Personification’s body mass. They can’t exploit the system and eat endless food for infinite mass to use.

[thequietmanno1]

TheLreads, Vigilantes ch 99, Replies Part 2

1) “He’s used to being used to cushion falls, it’s part of his powerset Aizawa.”- Knuckle taught him how to become the trash cushion on the sidewalk. 2) “Oh nevermind then, it was just McBee realizing that his plans continue to go down the drain in the most expected ways because he’s a dumbass. Meanwhile his tulpa continue to give moral support.”- Koichi: “Does something nice, supportive and heroic.” Nomura: And that makes me Angry.

3) “I’m sorry, the guy who can nullify quirks by looking at people can’t do anything to stop you? You sure about that McBee? The only way I can see that being true is if you brought a bomb to Naruhata.”- Aizawa can only be in one place at one time, and as long as Nomura keeps his distance from him and ensures he’s nowhere near the hospital, he’ll have assassinated Pop long  before Aizawa ever appears on the scene. It helps that with the low-lighting, it’s harder for Aizawa to get a glimpse of the enemy- though, I’m not sure if his Quirk works properly if it’s too dark to see the target even if they’re within 5 feet of you? Never really been established if that’s a limitation. 4) “Nevermind again, it was just the legion of civilians that know Koichi as a vigilante. Usual stuff of course. Meanwhile Aizawa is not pleased.”- He’s seeing Koichi in action as a hero without him actually being a hero. This is illogical, and thus irritates him. 5) “I forget sometimes that the general public doesn’t know Aizawa since he is more of an underground type that stays away from the spotlights. Even so, the fact that people know Koichi first as a hero and assume Aizawa must be one too since he’s around him is sending me”- Aizawa’s night is not going to get any better. First, he has to deal with an uncooperative punk who won’t learn the lesson he’s trying to beat into him, then he has to reassure nervous civilians on the ground floor, something he’s long established to be very bad at. 6) “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GUYS EVEN ABOUT YOU KNOW HE’S A VIGILANTE EVERYBODY AROUND THE NEIGHBORHOOD KNOWS HE’S A VIGILANTE IT’S BEEN THREE FUCKING YEARS ALREADY HOW DO YOU KNOW HIM BUT DOESN’T KNOW HE’S NOT A PRO HERO”- Everybody assumed that him running around committing heroic acts without official hero intervention against him meant he was official. Tacit endorsement and all that. 7) “To be honest I’m surprised there’s that many people walking out considering it’s the middle of the night and the lights are out. I know there must be people coming from work and all that, but jesus at least hurry home, or take cover somewhere”- With the power out, they have no TV or internet to amuse themselves with, so they venture out into the streets to see what the hassle is that interrupting the late-night sports match.

8) “People are bullying Aizawa and it’s honestly one of the funniest things I saw so far. Rare W for furuhashi.”- The boot is on the other foot now. At least it’s funnier than the next time he has to take public criticism for the actions of a bunch of villains. 9) “OH GOD OH FUCK NOW IT’S SPIDERMAN HE IS HERE TO SAVE THE DAY FOR REAL”- It’s spider-man’s Fashion designer! 10) “…

It’s jeanist and edge, isn’t it?

don’t tell me they took this long to find koichi”- I figured they were just hanging back and letting Aizawa handle things on his own, as a favour to him, especially since all of them don’t exactly want to hurt Koichi when stopping him, and Aizawa’s power is best suited for making Koichi run out of his Speed(tm).  11) “OH WHAT A FUCKING COINCIDENCE, THE WHOLE CREW IS HERE RIGHT NOW, RIGHT AS WE NEED TO PLAN A COUNTERATTACK

McBEE NEVER STOOD A CHANCE CONSIDERING HE HAD THE AUTHOR AGAINST HIM”- Honestly, he only seems to have been effective so far because of Furuhashi throwing him some major bones to help build him up into being the final major threat to Koichi. 12) “OH WAIT FUCK I DIDN’T NOTICED THAT WAS THE INTENTION OF THAT WEB HE THREW

FOR FUCK’S SAKE AIZAWA EVEN CALLED A STRING PHONE AND I DIDN’T NOTICE IT

GOD FUCKING DAMMIT”- I Think we’ve seen more applications of Jeanest’s fibre master Quirk in action in this series than we ever did in his showing in MHA.

(Vigilantes ch 97) 13) “But that’s not the reason why. Furuhashi wanted cool heroes we already knew about to face Koichi to show how awesome he is for outsmarting and defeating them, and I already said what I think about it.

*sigh*

And unfortunately I really want to see how this is gonna go down”- The actual reason was so that Koichi could have some competent crises-management heroes on the scene to help the populace whilst he’s dealing with Nomura’s direct attack on the Hospital. (Vigilantes ch 98) 14) “And definitely not because we had permission to use character from the main series and thus we wanted to shove as many recognizable faces as we could whenever we could”- Also because Koichi would be needing professional help in a wide area to handle civilian unrest, when that’s not really been part of his vigilante training so far.

  15) “Wait where is that light coming from? What the fuck, why are there shadows here? Is the moon that bright right now?”- Can’t be, it’s not the time of the month for the Full Moon yet, and we’ve only made it part-way through Tartarus so far- oh wait, got mixed up there.

16) “OH JESUS FUCK YOU JINXED IT

NOW I KNOW ALL MIGHT IS GONNA SHOW UP TO SAVE THE DAY

AGAIN.”- Well, only if the plan falls into utter chaos and draws a big enough scene. But surely Nomura can’t fuck it up that badly, can he?

17) “No rush Phelps, it’s not like you could do something useful there anyway.”- Phelps would be a great asset as an official law enforcement officer if he could only get over his need to run things up the chain of command, rather than taking the initiative when the time comes. 

18) “Everything was kinda going fine, kinda, until those last few pages, because they pretty much spoiled the end of the story. All that “we did this so All Might won’t come here and ruin the day” is just so we can’t complain when All might come here and ruin the day.”- Well, he won’t actually, so long as Nomura keeps the actual attack quiet and swiftly done. All Might will absolutely deploy if the fight gets to a level beyond what Koichi can handle solo, but in a fight when both sides are using low-powered versions of their moves (Koichi on instinct, Nomura by necessity) in order to keep things from escalating beyond the scope of a scuffle in the darkness, All Might will never catch wind of it until there’s a new corpse in the hospital morgue.  @thelreads

[angryteapott-archive]

Why is Goncharov 1973 funny:

I saw something like the goncharov joke stands in direct contrast to the “sometimes the curtains are just blue” post which made me go hm…. Also saw people confused by the joke so now I thought too much and made a three parter on my take

Part 1: shoe movie funny

The original joke is that a pair of shoes invented an obviously fake movie, which is funny because why would a pair a shoes do that. The derivative joke is a person going “wow loser you haven’t seen this fake movie?” Which is a joke stressing how ridiculous it is by pretending it’s normal for shoes to advertise a niche obviously fake scorsese film, who isn’t known for gimmicky advertising, BUT ALSO a joke on how bullies could use fear of missing out to make people just pretend to have seen something that doesn’t exist rather than reveal ignorance (like the classic made up band name jokes).

The next step of the Goncharov joke, and from what i can tell launched it all, is a person making up a poster about the movie and going oh yes this very real movie. It has jokes about the mafia genre tropes (“ice pick joe”, a hot lady side character, mostly male cast, scorsese actors) as well as being funny because it commits highlights the same two juxtapositions as the previous jokes, FOMO and shoe movie funny, while adding the inherent funniness of someone putting in way too much work for a bit. Things like the soundtracks follow on this (they’re mostly funny because they take the shoe movie too seriously) and thus should be categorized as part of the third wave.

Part 2: sometimes the curtains are just blue

The fourth wave of goncharovism, which is the bulk of the posts and the subject of most discussion, is media criticism, content, and derivative works about Goncharov, a movie that doesn’t exist. There’s posts that read like actual film critics, lines that seem like surprisingly good dialogue, themes about time because Film Shows Clocks Means Deep, bad overwrought dialogue, and most critically, the typical tumblr engagement with a piece of media including meta, gifsets, fanworks and snide comments about how other people are misinterpreting the movie. A movie that isn’t real. It’s fake.

The joke here is obviously a love letter to and scathing critique of criticism- the fact that analysis of something that doesn’t exist reads like actual analysis that people unironically post mocks that a lot of analysis doesn’t engage with text but overlays existing biases over it regardless of content, and also that a lot of movies are the same movie tbh. Katya is being held to unrealistic standards makes fun of shallow stock feminism, “homoeroticism” points to tumblrs obsession with gay stuff that isn’t actually that gay, and all the fake and often bad quotes show how we love to feel deeply about stuff we don’t really engage with. It’s also pointing to how silly it is to put in this much “anger” and effort in and how enjoyable it is to do this, regardless of whether it makes sense. Sometimes curtains are just curtains, and sometimes a clock doesn’t fucking exist, but it sure is fun to say what the curtain really means is that humanity is inherently sinful and that the clock means that Goncharov and Andrey, two characters that don’t have personalities because the movie they’re from doesn’t exist, wanna fuck.

The joke is that it’s fake deep, but it’s fun to do anyways. The joke is that people are getting mad about “people” who don’t exist being sexist etc because they’re making fun of tumblrinas who don’t look at nuance and assume a very specific form of oppression without evidence AND that people would say that shit because scorsese bros ARE sexist. The joke is that we know it’s fake but people find themselves taking it seriously anyways because it’s fun to make up a movie together and fun to make fun of ourselves. I love it!! It’s great!!! But it’s not a declaration against that the curtains are just blue, it’s a satire making the same point much more joyfully.

Part 3: the reality of goncharov

The fake goncharov movie has trended a fairly specific ways: it has defined characters and relationships, a fairly limited cast in terms of people who matter, homoeroticism, hot girl with a gun, and a lot of foreshadowing. It’s very invested in Katya and Goncharov’s personal narratives despite the wide array of people on the poster. Other than that very funny post about a (fake) shoot out showing the destructiveness and hollowness of nationalism, it’s not all that engaged in systems or the mafia specifically.

And sure, our Goncharov is so narrow partially due to its fake genre- mafia movies are tropey and hero obsessed. It’s fake. We’re making fun of the “best movie” by making a fake tropey movie!! But half the joke is being earnest, and our fake movie is chock full of the tumblr beloved tropes of obsession with romantic relationships, with “themes” that emphasize tragic endings for mutual obsessions, of an absolute lack of engagement with systems while insisting we are engaging , and of a focus on two or three characters instead of an ensemble cast- a million people are writing a movie and yet it has no breadth.

And GET THIS- Goncharov is a real movie. No, I mean it. Goncharov is probably a Google-translate-error-caused misprint of the movie Gomorrah, “presented” by Scorsese while not being directed by him at all. Egbert’s review, so mercilessly parodied in Gonch-posting (or goncharosting, as I like to say), calls it “a curative for the romanticism of The Godfather and Scarface”. Rather than deifying a specific man, it is a series of vignettes about horrible violence that seems unavoidable for its rotating characters. It’s based on real killings, and many of its actors were actually arrested for mafia activities. Forget hollow themes- it’s a movie that’s harrowing due to its reality.

Which is very very funny. Like i genuinely can’t believe we made a fake mafia movie that’s accidentally about a realest mafia movie ever made that proves how much we don’t mentally engage with the important oppressions and systems in our world while insisting that we’re self aware the irony the thematic parallel the sheer “oh fuck for real”ness of it all i was going to try to say something deep but like can you believe it??? God playing is playing 4-d funny chess with every last one of us. Long live goncharov

[athetos]

Through some quirk of chemistry or trauma that only a trained team of therapists could unravel, I have come to think “being needed” is the truest form of “being loved”, which has led me to places no sane person would go. I might as well have had a bunch of “easy target” signs on my back for a good decade. I inevitably meet someone cute who is in a bad place in life, help them out and support them, they appreciate me and love me for my assistance, and I fall head over heels. Which would be fine if these were the type of people who just needed help getting on their feet. No, I always commit to the most toxic, “refuse to change because someone (me) will bail them out” people, who only love me they can use me, whether they’re consciously aware of it or not. The type of people who lash out at everyone around them and blame it on their mental illness or history. These are people I can spend hours and hours gathering resources for, to get out of their shitty living situation, to see a therapist, to get a better job, and all they have to do is say yes or do it, and they say “nahh I don’t feel like it right now.” People who do nothing to better themselves or their lives even when the opportunity is right in front of them, because they don’t want to put the work in.

And every time I ignore the warning signs, dive right in because I’m like a golden retriever who is happiest being told “good boy” and getting a Pat on the head, and sometime down the road my friends or family or both sit me down for an intervention and tell me “you have got to get out of this while you can, you’re miserable, can’t you see how miserable they’re making you? When was the last time you were happy? No matter what you do, nothing will change until they decide to get better on their own.” And then I’ll stand up to my partner and tell them “things have to change, I can’t keep enabling you or letting you walk all over me”, and they throw a tantrum and threaten to hurt themselves, and of course we break up and I’ll spend the next several months in therapy processing all the abuse I went through. And then I’ll say “I’ll NEVER make that mistake again!” And proceed to make that mistake again.

Anyway I’m trying to buck my programming and be… not like that anymore. And I definitely feel I’ve made a lot of progress, as I’m probably mentally ready to be in a relationship again. But even if I’m in a healthy relationship for once, I fear that this is going to keep haunting me. There might always going to be words or actions that make me flinch, or memories that make me space out and lose track of time. I’ll probably always have thoughts in the back of my head like “is this actually healthy? Are they using you? You stupid, stupid fool. How can you be sure this isn’t someone manipulating you again? How can you be sure that this love isn’t conditional on what resources you can provide them?” It seems so much like people don’t care about me for me, but for what I can do for them. Even if I date someone who has their life totally together, there will always be something to knock them down, and until that moment, I don’t know how they’ll react. My fatal flaw is I’m too trusting, and pathetically loyal, so it’s so easy for me to get trapped when it’s far too late to simply bow out.

Yet I remain optimistic!

[2n2n]

idle thinking on the shape of love, endurance, persistence, and unconditional commitment in this manga.

rapidfur

!!!!! This is amazing! It's a little funny, but I always kind of disliked Akane, but... I feel like you have a knack for really looking deeper into the work and finding connections, and bringing out a complete story! It's a little funny, I think recent western fandom developments have made analysis for this series hard, since everyone is so quick to point out themes of abuse and such... which isn't necessarily bad, but when has real life ever been so simple. D:

HEY THANKS this is probably my... favorite of the posts I’ve made, I!!! even wish it was a little more coherent/organized lol.... but, I’m glad the messaging is there and interesting and got through!! I really-- feel most strongly, about this through line between all arcs!!! My jaw was.... on the floor, as Akane/Aoi happened, I couldn’t imagine their r’ship would also thread all of these themes into it. I also thought the manga would be a little messier, have a few more loose ends, some ‘randos’ if you will. I honestly thought Akane and Aoi would always remain boring to me, and I can’t believe the manga essentially popped me in the jaw about all my assumptions. The ‘twist’ of their personalities doesn’t even feel cheap, either .... I suddenly felt legitimately guilty for writing off Aoi as ‘just some normal girl, friend of Nene, nothing significant’..... I had to deal with Akane going from “god, some goober SIMP out here...” in my mind to “hhihihieeeek... why is he allowed to do hot things omg”

I’ve definitely seen some write-ups try to assert the theme is ‘abuse’, and responses to/conditions of abuse, but by god, if that were true, it sure would be gosche how often this manga uses punches and brutality as either a punchline (what is Akane + Teru in this lol?), or a spicey picante to an ultimately romantic scene

It would be so out of tune for a Manga About Abuse to sooooocapriciously depict the very ropes that symbolize isolation and ownership/control/influence of others as sexually alluring. Boy all the contexts of these, ropes... all these situations....

... but if isolation/ownership/control was at times allowed to be an aspect of some sort of, ultimate love, hmmmmm... hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....

hmmmm...love....

hmmm... control

hmmmm... influence..... 

hmmmm... HMMM 

Not to be TOO cheeky, lol, but gosh.... devotional love bleeds through every inch of symbolism in the manga. Hanako himself compares being ‘bound’ to ‘like being in a relationship’ (I can’t... believe you say that....)

Hanako relates a curse to love..... 

can’t believe we come all the way back around to this concept, so many chapters later.

ohhhhhh famous bound-boy Hanako-kun can just say being ‘bound’ and ‘being in a couple’ are synonymous by certain definitions? you who are bound? to someone? GEEZ. I honestly hate this manga sometimes. It’s TOO linear. It’s almost blindingly direct.

Which is to say, there's a lot more to appreciate to a character than only thinking theyre worthless because they're annoying... ♡ devotion! I was starting to think AidaIro was writing a really confusing all-over-the-place story, but these analyses are really making me rethink my way of media analysis. Sometimes it's very easy to just parrot what other people say as fact, and not think about things deeper... anyways! Just offering my appreciation again. ☆ミ

thanks again!!! It’s.... rrrgh I’m just one person with one interpretation, in a sea of equally proposed ones, I’m just happy if anything I say feels like it ‘clicks’ or rings true to what you’ve read yourself, personally. If it goes down smoother than other things you’ve tried to perceive in the text. 

Its always a struggle for me a bit-- I love DOING analysis-- but I also dislike the way modern fandom tends to convene on analysis and defer to analysis, rather than engaging the manga themselves directly (and trying to interpret it for their own). On one hand I resent the pipeline of some reddit take becoming the penultimate western narrative (usurping the very manga itself), but also I kindof have no choice but to try to assert my own take, too, and influence other’s perceptions (for better or worse, as I’m just some shmuck).

I feel that modern-day fandom is sortof odd, I think social media winds up dominating and creating a singular discussion/interpretation of media  .... I saw it so much I did want to at least, prove that someone out there has a different take, that very different interpretations can exist....?

...but anyway, I do think. Love is this manga’s greater unifying factor than anything else. Sincerely!!! Really!!!

[rotationalsymmetry]

I’m going to try again (cw general discussion of rape, murder, anti black violence.)

Being against rape and being against prisons are not in any sense in opposition to each other. Both are based on valuing bodily autonomy and being opposed to suffering and in favor of people generally being safe and happy.

It’s important to realize that the vast majority of rape isn’t the sort of thing the criminal justice system is particularly helpful about. A lot of rape cannot possibly be proven not to be consensual sex in court. And a lot of rape is committed by people who have dramatically more power against people with dramatically less power, sometimes by eg police officers or prison guards or soldiers in a country they’re invading, and sometimes against undocumented immigrants and sex workers and disabled people who require high levels of care and other people who really cannot go to the police and expect that to not make things worse for them.

It is also important to realize that there is very much a history of specifically the fear of black men raping white women being used to drive anti-black racism, from lynchings to mass incarceration and cops killing black people. While this is a thing that can happen and it is bad, it is not what the vast majority of rapes look like and it’s not a proportionate response. Rape is bad. But it’s not so overwhelmingly or uniquely bad that it makes killing people somehow not bad, or incarcerating people (which is itself a wrong that is capable of messing up people’s lives on the same order as rape even when it doesn’t include sexual violence itself, which it often does) or creating a culture where young black men grow up consistently seeing people like themselves be portrayed as thugs, as criminals, as predators, as sub-human.

I believe people are people. I believe black lives do in fact matter and need to be valued as much as white lives and are not currently valued as much as white lives. I believe in bodily autonomy and in personal freedom. I believe in prison abolition.

I was raised by liberals and I feel like I should make a plea for moderation here, that anyone reading this who isn’t against letting out murderers should still be with me on letting out people who have done non-violent drug crimes for instance. But…idk, do any of the liberals really want anyone in prison for non-violent drug crimes? And yet that’s what we keep getting. (In the same way that “but teenagers shouldn’t have access to irreversible surgery” gets somehow used to keep them off puberty blockers and 20 year olds off of HRT. And that 20 years ago people who thought that “there should be something for gay couples, just call it civil unions or something, not marriage” kept voting for ballot measures that did in fact also forbid civil unions.) I’m not sure half assed allies are allies at all. I’m not sure we can get any degree of giving cops less money or letting a few more people out of prison unless we face head on this fear of murderers and rapists (for certain definitions of murder and rape) and see the harm that fear does and throw it out entirely and realize that if George Zimmerman and the various cops who have killed black people can walk free, people who have killed people in a way that legally counted as “murder” can be allowed to walk free too without the fucking world ending. If the white guy who raped me can walk free without the world ending, so can rapists who did something legally recognizable as rape. And you know what? I can be generous. All the cops and prison guards and politicians who voted for mass incarceration and all the people who have done horrifying things in the military and the people who run the companies that make drones and chemical weapons, those can all walk free too. Because depriving people of their liberty is itself violence.

Prison. Abolition. Now.

[ravenkinnie]

oh of course! I don’t think my question I too personal but it felt weird to just drop it on you without making sure it’s ok. Of course that doesn’t mean you have to reply. Please just ignore this if you think it is too personal. You are the only other person I „know“ with bpd and you always seem honest so I thought maybe you’d have some perspective on this.

So I have a new partner and they have bpd. We are really open about it and they taught me a lot. Recently they have been asking me a lot if I still love them and told me they have been feeling very insecure even when they logically know my feelings won’t just change overnight. They told me to look up „fp“ and how that was the intensity of attachment they had towards me. Now I really fell down a rabbit hole with this (especially on tik tok) and there are some people (with bpd themselves) who suggest people shouldn’t „feed“ this sort of attachment too much. Not ignoring the other person or rejecting them but setting clear boundaries and not reassuring them every single time. They said in the long run this would help them detach themselves again so they become more rational and less likely to act impulsively.

Ive talked to my partner about this and they said it sounds reasonable but difficult to handle for them as well. In the end we decided as long as we communicate openly it would all be ok.

Now that was like a month ago and lately my partner has become really detached. They won’t talk to me and when I caught them crying they told me to leave them alone. Now I know it’s not cool but I asked their friend if they knew what was wrong and they just said my partner has been feeling like it’s hard to maintain our relationship lately. Basically as I understand it they don’t feel loved enough but they also know those feelings aren’t rational and feel guilty about them.

Now of course you aren’t a therapist and my question isn’t really about this situation because that’s between me and my partner but all of this just made me wonder if there even is a universal way to support someone with bpd. I absolutely love them but more often than not it feels like both trying to connect more and keeping my distance is hurting them. And it’s starting to hurt me as well.

How do you as someone with bpd feel about the balance between closeness and detachment? Can it really work to try and „make them“ love you less so they can more easily handle a close connection in the long run?

Im sure of course there isn’t a one answer fits all but sometimes I feel like no matter how much I read about it I don’t quite understand how bpd affects the way people think and feel.

Im sorry again if this too personal and too much. Regardless of if you answer or not I hope you’ll have a nice weekend :)

tbh there's no general answer to this, people are just different. everyone experiences different parts of bpd differently and the way they navigate these things in relationships will differ. the thing about bpd attachments is that they are just not stable lmao and that makes forming relationships v hard because it feels like you can't control those emotions. I've experienced splitting in relationships before and it's a very difficult and crazy thing to experience and explain because you know its not rational but that doesn't mean that you can stop feeling these things. and honestly maybe it's controversial to say but there's a point where you have to accept that maybe recovery means not being in relationships like this for a while - not not forming connections at all but maybe not committed relationships like this because you need to reach a point of recovery where you can handle these things by yourself to some extent before you can learn to handle it with a partner.

now I'm not a bitch to be telling people whether that's something they should do because I've been in relationships continuously since I was 19 so I'm not the brightest example hshshsjsk but personally, one thing I learned is that you can't form a healthy attachment in a relationship until you can learn that you can be okay by yourself, whatever that looks like. I think it can look like a detachment but I think of it more like independence that allows you to rationalise those bpd feelings because you can handle that fear of abandonment better.

that's why I also don't like framing bpd as loving too much or sth, like forming this independence is not loving less, I don't love my girlfriend less now than I loved someone before her just because I feel more like my own person in our relationship and set boundaries that don't rely on needing to be dependent anymore. if you want to work on a healthy relationship despite issues that will pop up because having a disorder that fucks you over constantly will create friction, you need to work on your own identity and separate stable personhood too on top of emotional regulation that helps with mitigating issues related to splitting etc