#(well I guess there are some good movies but I’m just generally underwhelmed by them)

[amethystroselily]

I think the reason I enjoy Chinese webnovels is because they’re literature (the best form of storytelling) that isn’t bound by the rules of the three act structure and have more of the arc structure used in long-running manga. Which when done right is really fun.

(TikTok showed me too many “writing advice” videos a while ago where they were talking about how to properly utilize the three act structure and it made me realize that limiting yourself to that format has been to the detriment of so many otherwise good novels. And that publishing houses and capitalism as a whole are absolutely destroying creativity in media, because why are all of these writing advise videos from people in the industry so. fucking. formulaic????)

[ape-apocalypse]

My Thoughts on Kingdom

First off, my general no-story-spoilers thoughts on Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes.

I really really liked this movie! I loved all the characters, both human and ape. I really enjoyed the story, even if it was a little bit predictable, and I could guess along the way what was going to happen next (though that may just have been because I watched every single trailer and TV spot and could guess based off scenes I had seen). The animation on the apes was phenomenal, and the landscape was gorgeous. I love the world building and seeing the ape communities grow and have their own traditions and beliefs in this world.

For the things I did not like, I definitely thought the pacing was off. Weirdly the story and the pacing felt a lot like War to me, and much of my criticisms about Kingdom are similar to what I thought of War. The ending is a little underwhelming, and I think they were taking too much focus on setting up for future movies, but I didn’t hate it, just didn’t feel wowed like the end of the previous films. But overall, I thought it was a great movie. Not as good as Dawn which is my favorite among the Apes films, but definitely a worthy successor to Caesar’s trilogy.

I definitely plan to see the movie again and think it will further develop my thoughts but those are my initial thoughts after one viewing. I give a three out of five stars.

Onto the spoilers... read at your own risk below the cut

To elaborate on why I feel like Kingdom is very similar to War, here’s my basic breakdown: an inciting incident sends the lead ape off on a journey, he encounters a strange ape and a human who come along on the journey, he loses an ape companion, he is captured by the main antagonist who does a big monologue on the fate of his species is in his hands alone but otherwise doesn’t do much else and ends up with an unsatisfying death, lead ape brings his people home. This fits well for me because much of my criticism for Kingdom is the same criticism I had for War, especially with poor pacing and an underwhelming ending. I think, since both movies involve a physical journey with lots of side characters and a big looming antagonist who doesn't get much to do, War and Kingdom would have been better served as mini-series, where they had more than 2.5 hours to tell their story. But for being confined to a film, they are still enjoyable, even when suffering the same flaws.

I thought the story was good, even if predictable. I could guess most of the story beats as they came but still enjoyed them. There was a definite pacing issue; it felt rushed once Noa got on the road to finding Proximus. One thing that did surprise me was the relationship between Noa and Mae. Halfway through the movie, I was thinking that I wasn’t really feeling a bond between them and was the writing not working. Once I reached the end of it, I realized oh, there wasn’t supposed to really be a bond between them. I actually kinda like that, I like how driven Mae is for her mission of reclaiming human society. 

The movie ends with the question of can humans and apes truly coexist. Both Mae and Noa don’t have that answer at the moment, all they know that they want their own people to survive. I hope that this is setting it up to go into more depth in future films. If they don’t pick this question up in a sequel film, then it really will be a dangling thread and I think this is one reason some reviewers say that the themes of the movie feel muddled, because they don't get a definitive answer. But I’m OK with this debate not getting resolved in this first movie, since it feels like it will be the theme of this trilogy.

One major criticism I have is it feels like characters were under-utilized. Raka was fantastic, probably my favorite character in the movie. I was really disappointed that he got swept away into the river, presumably to his death, so quickly. Now personally I don’t think he’s dead; I know orangutans can’t swim, but we didn’t see a body and the credits end with orangutan sounds rather than chimp or gorilla sounds. So I would not be surprised if he popped up in a future film. But I didn’t really feel emotional when he was swept away in the water. Likewise, I think that Proximus is severely underused. If you’ve seen his scenes and trailers, then you’ve seen the majority of his screen time. I am not surprised that he ended up being a one movie villain, since I think the next movie will have humans as the main antagonists, but I was pretty disappointed that that was all we got of him. I didn’t mind him dying by the birds, I actually liked Noa and his clan singing the eagles song together, but I am sure a lot of people will dislike that ending for him.

Those criticisms aside, there is also much to love. The attack on the eagle village is an incredible action scene. Despite me knowing that it would end with Noa’s family captured and Koro dying, it is where I felt the most tension in the film, with Noa walking through the action, dazed and confused while there were so much happening around him. The humor was on point. I often forget that these films can have a good amount of humor, like Koba with his fake silly ape routine for the two humans in Dawn and Bad Ape’s silliness in War. so, this film did great on humor that kept me chuckling. Mae teaching Noa the word “shit” had me howling. I like Noa’s growth being connected to his father’s eagle, and whether he can call the bird to him or not. Again, I knew he would, because I had seen him in the trailer with the bird on his arm, but I thought it was well played with the bird pecking him in the very beginning of the film and then it coming willingly to him at the end.

Of course, the visuals are gorgeous, though they felt more on level with Dawn rather than War, which always had the best CGI among the Andy Serkis trilogy. I loved seeing the development of the apes; they're talking and showing more emotion than apes of the last trilogy, so their personalities really stand out, even if having so many characters meant they didn't each get as much spotlight. Soona and Anaya are my precious adorable babies and I will throw down with any writers or directors who dare to harm a single hair on their heads.

All in all, it's not a movie that I love and adore, but it was a really good film, despite some flaws. I think many of the flaws will be forgiven when/if they are allowed to do a full trilogy where they can resolve dangling threads and flesh out characters even more. But even if no other movies follow up, I still enjoyed the film and loved seeing a glimpse of post-Caesar ape societies.

[ahugenerdynerd]

So I think a lot of us can agree that Titans isnt a great show. But not just with their portrayals of the characters but also with the writing.

I personally can forgive what Titans has done with the different takes of the characters, don’t get me wrong it’s still shit but that’s not what this post is about.

The show is just packed full of bad writing. This coming from someone who has studied film for over 4 years. But anyone who knows anything can see how bad the writing is.

(I will be waiting to pass judgment on season 3 until the entire season is out, so this will be focusing of season 1 and 2)

Analysis under the cut

Firstly they will establish something, only for them to completely forget about that fact next episode. Case and point in episode 7 of season 2 Dick finds out that Deathstroke has been stalking them and is in the tower. After that he rushes back, visibly distraught with a gun in hand dramatically declaring that Deathstroke was there in the building. Only for in the very next episode for that fact to have been completely forgotten and now they’re all just leaving and it never gets brought up again.

This isn’t the only time something like this has happened but it’s the most glaringly obvious one.

Something that they also do which is most prevalent in season 2 is the spacing of the events between episodes. Titans will dedicate entire episodes just for one part of the story. This may work for some shows, specifically sitcoms that are aired on tv. Shows like The Big Bang Theory or Friends that viewers generally aren’t going to be watching in the correct order so they’re made to be stand alone episodes. But Titans isn’t a sitcom nor is it being aired on tv. What they really should have done is spread these scenes out over several episodes as flashbacks rather than to condense them down into one episode. Because by having the full flashback episodes it makes the show feel disjointed and they interrupt the drama and the suspense. It’s like getting to the climax of a film only to be interrupted by a 40 minute ad. You end up not really caring for the episode because you just want to know what happens with the cliffhanger from the previous episode. When really the events of these flashback episodes should be the most important and interesting part of the show. Where we get to see what happened between the Titans that made them brake up and character backstories and the like.

I think the most disappointing use of this is with the episode ‘Connor’. Rather than condensing Conners entire backstory up to meeting the Titans into one episode leaves a lot to be desired. I would have much preferred to have seen his backstory of escaping Cadmus and his relationship with Eve spread out over sever episodes in tandem to what was happen with the main cast. It would have created a lot more build up and anticipation for him finally meeting up with the rest of the Titans. Whereas what we got was one episode where we could easily guess exactly what was going to happen and where too distracted by Jason supposedly falling to his death to really appreciate the episode.

Secondly, is the shows pacing. It is all over the place. Season 1 was especially bad when it came to this and season 2 was only marginally better. Obviously I’m going to be talking about what happened with Trigon.

Fist of all the decisions for Trigon to be the big bad of the fist season was an interesting decision to say the least. But let’s forget about the comic book aspect and look at what made this season so bad writing wise.

Basically it all boils down to set up and pay off. The set up obviously being how the show sets up the climax, in this case the battle against Trigon. And the pay off basically being how rewarding the climax feels for the audience. With good writing you will have a pay off that is equal to or greater than the set up. If there’s not much set up then it’s easier for the pay off to be worth it for the audience. However in Titans case they set up the battle against Trigon right from the get go slowly building it up over the season, painting him as this neigh unbeatable force. Admittedly Titans was already of to a bad start with their decision to include Trigon in the first season what with the comic fans already knowing about his character and having to live up to the pre existing show Teen Titans as well as the animated movies. In a way they set themselves up for failure.

However where they really let themselves selves down was with the pay off. After having all this build up for the battle against Trigon, the final product falls extremely short. Where they really went off was not including the finale for the season in the actual season but instead moving it to the fist episode of season 2. I don’t know about any one else but when I went into season two after how season 1 ended I was expecting a majority of the episodes to be about the trying to defeat Trigon. But not even 40 minutes in and he’s defeated. This felt extremely unrewarding and underwhelming after waiting an entire season and the time in between to find out what’s going to happen next, only for him to be defeated almost immediately with little to no fuss.

This battle should have definitely been drawn out more. Taking place over several episodes or at least and entire one, where all of the Titans have to work together and struggle to defeat him. Rather than Raven just going out there herself and beating him instantly. There was no reward there. It was just over.

They had a similar problem in season 2 with Deathstroke, one of the Titans main villains. Going through all this build up and emotional turmoil only for him to just be stabbed and oh look he’s dead. You don’t just kill Deathstroke.

Side note: no one checked for a pulse, so I am personally of the opinion that he wasn’t actually dead but was just laying there playing dead hopping no one realised

Finally in this list of examples of bad writing is their tendency to introduce something new out of nowhere with no previous foreshadowing. The most obvious example being in season 2 episode 7 where out of no where we find out that Dick is hallucinating seeing Bruce. This came out of absolutely no where when there should have really been some build up to this. Maybe we could have seen Dick acting oddly, or Talking to no one or really anything. But we got nothing. It felt like someone had just come up with the idea on the day of filming with no previous forethought. Not to mention the fact that it basically only lasted the one episode, with it briefly coming back in episode 11.

Tl:dr: Titans had so much potential to be a great show but they just fell short with the writing. Everything just feels very rushed and not very thought over and they definitely could have done better.

P.S There is definitely still good writing in Titans however. Mostly to do with their portrayals of mental health. So don’t take this post as me just dissing on Titans. Maybe I’ll write another post about the good writing or analysing their camera usage, idk.

[kpopmakesmequestionmylifechoices]

Kingdom Round 3: "Plagiarism", rigged voting and fanwars.

[Disclaimer: It is possible that for fans of certain groups I'll come off as offensive. I like each of the groups, I possess albums of TBZ, SF9 & SKZ, and I watched HOURS of content/debut programs of ALL the participating groups. Nevertheless, I will ALWAYS say my honest opinion. If you want to fight me, you're ofc allowed to do so but I hope you're all mature enough to not feel offended by opinions.]

Act 1: Tbz, where do your ideas come from?

So what I've noticed is that there's a massive difference between tbz behind the scenes and other groups'. Not only in this episode. So far, tbz simply DID NOT show how they create ideas, stages, how they practice. They picked a song, fooled around, and then met up with RTK members. It was cute sure, but it had NOTHING to do with the stage. The other groups showed practice scenes, showed their ideation process, showed who taught them and how. The boyz didn't. No practice, no ideation. Only song choice. We didn't see them practicing the choreo, we didn't see how they even got the idea for this stage. Their behind the scenes footage sadly has NOTHING to do with their performance. I really wish we could see them practicing and coming up with ideas.

Another big problem I see with this, is that they literally don't explain where their ideas come from. Now for people who know Game of Thrones (GoT hereafter), it probably appears rather obvious that the previous and also this stage was inspired by GoT, right? The white walkers? Ice and fire? The throne? The freaking red wedding??? I can't be the only one who sees a connection between their stages and GoT. ATEEZ said they were inspired by Pirates of the Carribbean. SF9 said they were inspired by film noir and showed how they worked with an actor on their storyline. iKON explained how they associate inception with dreams and put together their ideas. But TBZ didn't freaking talk about any of this. Either it was never recorded, or it never was aired. In any way, it's extremely suspicious in my eyes. Moreover it's just pretty shit to not say where your idea comes from. Especially not when you even name your stage after the iconic red wedding... Now IF they were NOT inspired by GoT, then it would be some... extremely huge coincidences... especially the stage title is just a bit too much tbh. But more to that stage later.

Edit: It came to my knowledge that according to deobis, Cre.Ker will post the content after Kingdom on tbz social media. Whoever took that decision needs to be fired tbh. If the content will be released, I'll link to it and add some few words to it.

Act 2: The good, the bad, and ... All hail king Juyeon?

Let's talk about the performances now.

SF9: What I dislike is the fact that as I stated in my previous Kingdom post, they are forced to do such dramatic musical/movie stages to even be recognized as part of the show. Moreover, I found it weird and unfitting that they held guns during the group dance parts, to me it seemed a bit off. Also, at times, their energy level seemed a bit low.

What I liked is that even tho it was a MASSIVE set, the performance still was extremely easy to understand and follow. They all looked insanely good tho, SF9 simply is mature and manly. I liked the concept, it was fresh because it for once had no fantasy vibe but actual criminal mafia energy. My favourite parts were Jaeyoon's fighting scenes because they were very well choreographed. Altogether, I really enjoyed it and also found it interesting how they referred to the Boyz crown scenes on RTK.

The Boyz: In my eyes, this is already the second GoT inspired concept they did. Not a fan of this. Moreover, I'm a bit pissed that it looks as if they are selling all that as their own ideas. As I said before, I believe this is GoT inspired, the name at least definitely was - but it's never said that the inspiration comes from there, because we literally have no information about where their ideas come from and if it's even their own ideas. To me it has the bitter aftertaste of wanting to hide sth the viewers aren't supposed to see. But this is not tbz fault but the fault of whoever writes/directs/edits their footage.

With the title of the stage given, I actually thought I'd see a wedding. But what I've seen was a woman in a bird cage. And then many more women. I failed to see what this all had to do with a wedding, and I moreover failed to see the connection to "THE" red wedding. And I failed to understand the plot once again, and because they didn't explain it beforehand, I'll never understand it.

What I liked is that the performance was way less dramatic than it was ever before. It didn't seem like a stunt show anymore, it didn't seem overdramatic anymore. It was easier to focus on the performance. Sadly, I noticed that this "downgraded" (aka slow-paced and less dramatic) stage was unfortunately underwhelming in comparison with what they did before - which was sth I predicted from beginning on. At some point you can't go bigger anymore, and if you tone it down it'll automatically seem underwhelming.

Edit: It's sad that they have this pressure to outperform themselves because they've won RTK. But honestly, it was clear that the winner would have this pressure on them. I don't see why I would pity them for this, after all, each of the groups feel pressured anyways and I rather feel sorry for ALL groups together because this whole ranking/competition thing is just unnecessarily stressful. But once again, I don't understand why you all blame MNET for this. Don't forget that the companies have contracts with MNET and knew that shit would go down. If you blame any bigger instances, then please also the companies who put their idols on the show. It's not like they got forced to make their groups participate.

My biggest criticism this time however is the fact that they give the most screentime to Juyeon (and Sunwoo because of the rap parts), and the rest of the members barely appear, or basically aren't shown at all. I already felt before that there was a strong focus on Juyeon, but now it's srly showing very clearly. I really like Juyeon, but I don't find it fair. I think that doesn't do justice to the other members, which deserve screentime as well. In conclusion, tbz on kingdom is an extreme mess in my eyes, with lots of communication- and management flaws.

iKON: I belong to the group of people who heavily prefers THANXX over inception, so I was a bit sceptical about the song choice. They really made a YG version out of this tho, I was pretty impressed. The stage concept was pretty nice, iKON surely knows how to use light. Now the stage seemed very inspired by Inception (the movie) which makes a lot of sense - but wasn't communicated either. Just mentioning this because I critisized tbz earlier, so I think the same applies here to some degree. I didn't recognize the song anymore tho but I found it pretty refreshing. In my eyes they did the best so far in making another group's song their own. This could have been an iKON song for sure. As always, a fun stage.

My personal ranking will follow after the other stages.

Act 3: About cheating and faking.

The Voting looks as follows:

Views: 1. SKZ 2. iKON 3. ATEEZ 4. BTOB 5. TBZ 6. SF9

Online Voting: 1. SKZ 2. SF9 3. iKON 4. BTOB 5. ATEEZ 6. TBZ

Btw if anyone knows the overall voting, please comment or send a message, because I somehow missed it?

I said it before, and I say it again, this entire voting is rigged and I totally don't care about it anymore at this point because it's absolutely not trustable. Experts didn't know about the budget differences, who even are the experts, why did SF9 get zero on-site votes, and then ofc the fans who created 50 accounts to vote...this voting is a joke. What I can totally not understand is how ATEEZ and TBZ can rank last for online voting. Sth seems off here to me, especially the fact that SF9 ranks last in views but ranks 2nd in votes? I'm sorry to say this but I think that's the result of the ZZZ fanwar. My assumption is that there must be a big mass of people who purposely voted NOT for TBZ & ATEEZ, and my guess is - no offence - that those were stays. In accordance with the fanwar, they didn't give their 2 other votes to the other ZZZ groups but to whatever other group. Or in general the ZZZ fandoms purposely not voting for each other. That would explain extremely well why SF9 could suddenly rank 2nd. I'm tired of this voting, of fanwars and all this drama and I decided to not care about the official voting anymore.

If you got to this point, I wanna let you know that I feel very blessed that you made it through this long post hahaha. Thanks! And for the next week, I expect BIG THINGS. I'm the most excited for BTOB. Them covering back door is the most absurd thing I've imagined for a long time hahahaha. But Eunkwang with tattoos really is a good sight, isn't it ;)?

[dfdph]

Spotlight - Prologue

Author D.

Pairing Jungkook x Reader (female)

Genre Actor AU | Hollywood AU | Exes to Lovers AU | Romance | Fluff | Angst

Warnings Mentions of cyber bullying

Word count 3.5k

Summary “Her stylist had chosen a wonderful black Elie Saab Haute Couture for the occasion. The gown was long, sleek and structured, with overlaying tulle and tafta, the top was semi-transparent, with long sleeves and padded shoulders,  and the whole dress was adorned with an intricate golden embroidery that highlighted her figure craftily. Her hair had been pinned neatly in a bun on top of her head, with some twists and braids that she had no way of replicating on her own. The make up artist had played with golden eyeshadow and had drawn a strong and thick black line with the eyeliner, making her gaze sharper and sexier. Y/N looked like a chic princess warrior, ready for battle. And, somehow, she really felt like it. She wasn’t anxious only about the ceremony, she had read the lineup, she had read his name. She knew there was no avoiding him this time: her first love, Jeon Jungkook.”

©️ dfdph, 2021 - All rights reserved. Reposting or translating onto other sites is NOT allowed.

     Award season was the period of the year Y/N hated the most. Despite being in the entertainment industry since she was a teenager - and now being in her late 20s -, she still couldn’t get used to the stress it put her through. She actually looked forward to dressing up and posing in front of dozens and dozens of photographers at the beginning of her career, but now that she had made a name for herself, now that everyone knew who she was, Y/N would gladly stay in her king sized bed watching some movie instead. Unfortunately, even if she wanted to, there was no way she could avoid attending this season’s ceremonies. 

     The past year had been Y/N’s most rewarding yet. She had been in fact casted by a renowned and award-winning director as the main character of his new historical movie, which turned out highly successful at the box office - earning more than $110,000,000 on its opening weekend - and highly acclaimed by the critics who had praised, not only the cinematography and the intricacy of the plot, but especially Y/N’s performance - described as raw, heartbreaking and graceful. To no one’s surprise, she was soon nominated as Best Actress in most of the award events, winning all of them despite the high competition and enriching the collection of trophies she had displayed in her home office.

     When she debuted ten years ago with a minor role in an episode of a television series she only dared dreaming of reaching such a peak in her career. She could have never imagined that she would become one of the highest paid actresses in the industry, that she would afford buying her dream car and her dream house in Los Angeles, and that she would have millions of fans supporting her all over the world. Yet, there she was, getting ready for ‘the dream come true’, the award of the awards: the Oscars. And she, Y/N Y/L/N, had been chosen as the strongest contender in her category: Best Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role. She had already been nominated twice before, but this time was different, this time she felt she could actually win. Hence why she couldn’t stop walking anxiously back and forth in the 5 star hotel room her staff had booked for the day.

     Her stylist had chosen a wonderful black Elie Saab Haute Couture for the occasion. The gown was long, sleek and structured, with overlaying tulle and tafta; the top was semi-transparent, with long sleeves and padded shoulders, and the whole dress was adorned with an intricate golden embroidery that highlighted her figure craftily. Her hair had been pinned neatly in a bun on top of her head, with some twists and braids that she had no way of replicating on her own. The make up artist had played with golden eyeshadow and had drawn a strong and thick black line with the eyeliner, making her gaze sharper and sexier. 

     Y/N looked like a chic princess warrior, ready for battle. And, somehow, she really felt like it. She wasn’t anxious only about the ceremony, she had read the lineup, she had read his name. She knew there was no avoiding him this time: her first love, Jeon Jungkook.

     Y/N was a completely different woman from who she was back in high school.

     She had grown in a very poor family. Her mother had to raise her, alongside her older brother, all on her own, working long hours as a housekeeper for a rich and snob family who mistreated her and paid her just enough so that she couldn’t resign. She was a very sweet woman who had to struggle every day to give her two children the most normal life she could afford. Y/N’s father, on the other hand, was never present: an alcoholic who couldn’t keep a job for more than a month, he regularly failed to pay child support after the divorce and never once made a call to hear from them.

     Y/N understood the importance of money early on, in elementary school, when her classmates started teasing her because of her hand-me-down clothes. She was used to wear her brother’s old t-shirts every now and then and never thought too much of it. She didn’t see any difference between the rock bands pictures or the flowery prints, she didn’t realize it mattered. And when she had told her mother that those girls had laughed at her, the woman almost cried, so Y/N decided not to mention it ever again.

     Y/N grew up into a very introverted and shy teenager. She wasn’t good with socializing and generally preferred being on her own. Her desire for solitude was so evident that her classmates gave up on their attempts to befriend her and she soon became the lone wolf of their high school. By junior high, she became almost invisible. 

     Strangely enough, Y/N’s dream was that to become an actress, a profession that required a lot of things she lacked of. Confidence, to begin with, or charisma. The only thing she believed she could do was hide inside the unused storage room on the second floor and play with the old props left by the drama club. 

     She met Jungkook while doing just that. 

     The boy was just coming back from the first meeting of the Mathematics Discussion Club - of which he was the president - when he heard someone crying from a room he never noticed before. He opened the door quietly, peeking his head inside the dim lighted room, only to find the silhouette of a girl lying on the floor in a fetal position and seemingly crying her lungs out in pain. She had her hands clutching tightly her head and she was sobbing so hard that she was on the verge of hyperventilating. On instinct, Jungkook rushed to her side, his books, pencils and calculator clattering all over the floor. 

     “Are you ok?!” he screamed in worry, putting his hands over her shoulders.

     Y/N jumped up, her wailing stopping so abruptly that it made Jungkook jump as well. As it turned out, Y/N was doing nothing more than acting the part of a terminally ill girl who was suffering intense head pains - a part she had invented all on her own to test her ability with dramatic scenes. it was something she did quite often. Just the day before she was performing Meryl Streep’s part in “Into the Woods” to an invisible audience.

     “I-I’m ok.” she mumbled, drying the fake tears from her cheeks.

     “What the hell?” Jungkook murmured, looking at her in astonishment. “What was that?”

     “I was ... I was just pretending.” she replied, her voice horse from all the screaming.

     “Pretending?” he repeated as he sat bewildered on the dirty floor. “You were pretending to be in pain? Why?!”

     Y/N felt the heat rising to her face. This was the first time she had to explain her weird little secret to anyone. “Acting.”

     “Acting.” Jungkook repeated once again. “And why are you doing it in here?” he asked looking around the creepy space, with its spider webs and abandoned miscellaneous objects. “What is this place anyways?”

     “It was the old storage room of the drama club.” Y/N replied. “They don’t use it anymore. There’s no space left.”

     “I can see that.” he said staring at the shelf just above their heads that looked about ready to collapse. “So, I guess you’re not in the drama club?”

     “No.” Y/N answered looking down at her crossed legs. She wondered if he was going to snitch on her. She really didn’t want to get in trouble. Besides, it wasn’t like she was doing something that terrible.

     “I could tell.” Jungkook replied. “I saw last year’s winter play and, let me tell you, you, crying on the floor 5 minutes ago, were ten times better than that.”

     Y/N looked back at him with her mouth open in surprise. She had no idea who this boy sitting crossed legged on the floor with her was, with his white button down shirt and over washed jeans, but he singlehandedly gave her the best compliment she could wish for. “Right?!” she exclaimed sitting straighter. “I thought so too! But everybody else acted as if they saw the best performance of their lives! I knew I couldn’t be the only one who taught that their interpretation of Shakespeare’s Antony and Cleopatra was nothing but underwhelming.”

     “Damn right.” the boy nodded in agreement. “I actually looked forward to it because I prefer it over Romeo and Juliet, but I was so disappointed. You should have played Cleopatra!” he added in an afterthought. “Why didn’t you?”

     Y/N felt herself blush once again. “I never performed in front of anyone.” she confessed. “Apart from my mother an brother, that is.”

     “That’s a shame.” Jungkook murmured pensively. “You have real talent, storage room girl. Believe me, I’m an expert.”

     Being friends with Jungkook was easy, falling in love with him was even easier. It came so naturally that Y/N didn’t even have the chance to fully realize it before they were officially dating.

     He was everything Y/N wasn’t and everything she wanted to be. Even at 16 years old he already was a very confident boy. He was incredibly smart, funny and a little bit nerdy. He didn’t belong to the upper class of their high school social pyramid, nor the middle, but he had no care in matching those standards because he loved himself for who he was - Stark Trek t-shirts, consumed tennis shoes and all. 

     In the short year the two of them were together, from junior to senior year, Jungkook became the reason behind Y/N’s happiness. She wasn’t aware of how lonely she really had been while asking to be left alone. Jungkook taught her to be open towards the world, to be curious and to believe in herself and her abilities. Thanks to him and his never ending support Y/N came to realize that she wasn’t meant to hide inside the abandoned storage room on the second floor, but she deserved the chance to follow her dreams.

     Together they filed their applications for college: Jungkook always wanted to become an aerospace engineer and had set the personal - and ambitious - goal to work for NASA; Y/N, on the other hand, had worked hard during her last year in high school to win a scholarship for whichever Performing Arts College was willing to take her in - it didn’t matter which one because she knew she started her acting career late. All she wanted was to study to become an actress, to perform on stage and bring to life incredible stories, to be someone one day and someone else the other.

     But it was such a big dream, something so fickle and risky, that Y/N couldn’t help but being overwhelmed by fear, not only for her future but that of Jungkook’s as well, because after all, despite all the changes she had gone through, a part of her was still hiding from the world. So she did something stupid, something very cliché, that nevertheless seemed the right thing to do at that time: she broke up with him.

     It’s for his own good, she had thought. He is brilliant, I don’t want to hold him back.

     Jungkook fought her and for her. He was afraid something like this would happen, he was sure it wasn’t what she really wanted, he knew she was just afraid. But Y/N was a very talented actress indeed and for a moment, as she looked straight into his dark eyes and told him she didn’t love him anymore, Jungkook felt his confidence waver.

     “I’m really thankful for what you’ve done for me.” she had said. “I wouldn’t be who I am today if it wasn’t for you.”

     “Please don’t lie.” he had whispered, trying to stop the angry and disappointed tears from falling from his eyes. “Don’t pretend. Not with me.”

     “I’m not.” Y/N replied, her voice firm. “I loved you, I really did. You’ll be my first love forever, Kook.”

     And the very next day, just like in one of those cheesy television dramas her mother loved so much, she flew hundreds of miles away from him, trying to not looking back. 

     If she said she never regretted it over the following years, it would be a lie. As she started her new life, she never failed to think of him. She wondered how he was doing, if his dreams were coming true and if he ever thought of her as much as she did of him. As she grew up and matured, Y/N realized how stupid her choice had been and how important Jungkook’s role had been in shaping her personality and in breaking her shell. Y/N was sure of it: if he didn’t found her that day inside the storage room, she wouldn’t be who she was today.

     Years after she broke up with him, Jungkook still popped up into her mind every now and then. She thought of him the first time she was casted for a walk on role in a movie; she thought of him the first time her name was credited in an episode of a TV show; she thought of him the first time she won an award.

      She thought of him with regret and a little bit of melancholy. Y/N never forgot him. Not even when when became so famous she barely had the time and energy to think about herself.

      The first time Y/N heard his name spoken by someone else’s mouth, three years ago, was a complete shock. She never talked of him to anyone, apart form her mother, her brother and Jimin, her best friend and manager, so he was supposed to be a nobody to everyone else but herself. As it turned out, with a very mysterious turn of events, Jungkook had left the path towards aerospace engineering and had decided to take his chance with acting. And from what Y/N gathered from the overheard conversation, he was starting to make a name for himself as well. 

     That night, back in her multimillion dollar villa, Y/N researched his name on the internet for the first time. 

     He was new to the industry and there wasn’t much about him, it was like he popped out of nowhere. But it was definitely Jungkook, Y/N recognized him from the pictures. He had grown into a beautiful man, so handsome that she did a double take and then had to stop herself from drooling. It wasn’t like he was ugly when they were together, but he was just a skinny teenager back then and this was a man, a real man who had lost all of his baby fat and now had a razor sharp jaw and a muscular body. Apparently, he was the protagonist of an ongoing TV series that was gathering a lot of success putting him in the center of the attention. ‘The new heartthrob’, that was how he was being called.

     Y/N couldn’t help but wonder what happened after they lost contact with each other that made him change his career so drastically. Whenever she thought about him she imagined him working on some challenging project for NASA, never on a movie set. She remembered he was passionate about theatre and cinema, but never once he had expressed the desire to become an actor like her. Y/N didn’t know what to think.

     As the years passed, Y/N watched as his acting career grew, as he starred in a success after the other and as he earned the respect of even the most strict directors and critics.

     Y/N watched, yes, but from afar, never daring to contact him and secretly avoiding the chances to meet him again. 

     She had been successful, until now.

     The drive to the Dolby Theatre went far too quick for Y/N’s taste. She could barely remember how she got from the hotel room where she had been preparing to the black luxury van. Before she knew it her stylist was taking away her favorite slippers and was putting on her dress-matching Dolce&Gabbana heels.

     Y/N didn’t have the time to think. Three years of running away and finally the moment had come. Jeon Jungkook - her first love, her ‘the one that got away’, probably her biggest regret - was probably in the car behind hers.

     “Y/N, two minutes.” Jimin called out, warning her to get ready. “You know the deal. Deep breath and own that red carpet as you always do. And-”

     “I know.” Y/N interrupted him. “The left side is my best side.”

     The man, dressed up as well in a black tux, gave her a wink. “I’ll be right behind you. You got this.” he declared, looking at her intensely. “This is the one.”

     “Thanks, Chim. But from all we know I could be the next Di Caprio.” she joked, the roaring noise from the red carpet now deafening.

     “On my dead body.” he smirked. “Talk to you later, princess.”

     “Later.” she hugged him briefly. “Oh, can you please make sure my mom and Seokjin got in fine? I totally forgot to call them.”

     “Of course. My assistant is with them, anyways.” Jimin said, putting a hand on the door handle. “Ready?”

     Y/N took a deep breath, put on her best charming expression and nodded. “Ready.”

     As soon as he opened the door, Y/N was immediately hit by the boisterous and echoing call of the fans. She wasn’t sure if it was only her impression but it seemed like every single one of them was screaming her name. She was, indeed, one of the biggest names of the night, there was no use in denying it, but Y/N couldn’t help but wish they stopped making her presence so obvious.

     A young usher, pretending not so well to be indifferent and trying to be professional, guided her towards the beginning of the red carpet, hundreds of cellphones following her movements like magnets.

     “Please, come this way, miss Y/L/N.” the usher instructed in a slightly trembling voice. “There will be someone from the staff signaling you were to stop to pose for the photographers.”

     Y/N knew this already. She had attended countless of events like this, after all. Yet she didn’t say anything to the shy boy, preferring to smile at him sincerely. “Thank you very much.” she said, watching as he blushed violently.

     Y/N started her walk, Jimin and her stylist following a few steps behind to make sure that everything went smoothly. The photographers went wild as soon as they saw her, the flashes of their cameras blinding her almost angrily. She was used to it now, she had mastered the trick: squinting sexily and blinking strategically.

     As she walked slowly towards the entrance of the theatre, posing with confidence and channeling her best princess warrior, Y/N almost forgot the worries she had about Jungkook, until a new wave of screams echoed to her ears. She stiffened, even if imperceptibly. It was him, the line up said he would be walking right after her. 

     The time had finally come. Ten years had passed and she was seeing Jeon Jungkook again for the first time. 

     She continued to walk nonchalantly, every step confident and her chin up and proud. But once she reached the end of the red carpet and the photographers moved their attention away from her, Y/N couldn’t help but stop for a second, ignoring a fellow actress and ‘friend’ waving at her a few feet further. 

     She could feel him, she could feel his presence behind her back. She could either turn around and catch a glimpse of him, or resume walking and pretend he wasn’t there. It took her a couple of moments of indecisiveness, in which Jimin looked at her questioningly, before taking the umpteenth deep breath of the evening.

     She turned, the hem of her $30 000 black dress brushing almost magically over the carpet, and there he was. For a moment the memory of the nerdy boy from high school overlapped the image in front of her. She was well aware of the fact that he wasn’t that teenager anymore, she had seen his pictures, watched his movies and interviews. The boy she remembered was long gone: standing tall and proud, more than twenty feet from her, was now Jeon Jungkook ‘the actor’, dressed in a perfectly tailored night blue tux that highlighted his toned body, black patent leather shoes and impeccably styled hair.

     And he was staring - with his dark and deep black eyes - right back at her.

[miraculouscontent]

Askplosion #11:

(note that I know I mentioned a “Voiced Askplosion” last time in the tags for anyone who put a 🎤 in their ask, meaning they wanted to hear me respond verbally to it, but I only got one and it wasn’t anything serious - just a tease from someone I know - so I either won’t be doing it at all or will be holding off)

Asks responding to previous posts:

ALYA NO!!!

(the idea of Sabrina avoiding not only Ms. Mendeleiev, but also Alya, is very amusing to me)

The fact that the special focuses on the love square instead of Sabrina and Delmar is a crime.

(also note that “Need some help?” is rhetorical in this context; Alya doesn’t care)

Highly recommended, honestly, otherwise it just turns into a big shame because there are shows I really like but with some content that I don’t like, and why torture myself with it when I can cut it out instead?

Just to give a rough idea, here’s my cut of “Desperada”; mind you, this is just my quick cut of it (basically a “beta” version where I just removed everything I disliked without much care for transitioning/having everything make sense; some of Marinette’s friends talking, the guitar scene, Aspik, etcetera), as I’m not comfortable handing over my “perfect” cut of it since it’s like my personal copy.

Yeah, that’s a super awkward scene. As much as I’d like to imagine that Adrien just doesn’t understand the “guy time” thing (which I still hate), the fact that they use the word “guy” specifically is--ugh.

I wasn’t aware of what he said in the French dub, so thanks! It’s really painful to see her throw so much love his way, openly and publicly and obviously, then be so humiliated for it, only for Adrien to feel nothing for her.

Say whatever you want about Chat Noir’s advances and how sAAAAAAD he is when she rejects him, but her rejections are just that; in private. There aren’t other heroes who are around and Chat is never really humiliated. Even in “Prime Queen,” Chat wasn’t the target - Ladybug was, and then Ladybug shifted it to Nadja - so Marinette is the one taking all the heat in love while Chat gets to sit on the sidelines (plus, then “Oblivio” happened and now people probably all thing they’re a thing).

Yeah! That’s the group I was thinking of!

Thank you!

I’m so sorry that happened. ;—;

I’m not aro but I am ace and I’ve gotten the whole, “oh it’s just because--” stuff before, so I know what it feels like to have people put on the pressure/invalidate you.

YES.

IT’S GORGEOUS.

I’m not really familiar with how holidays are celebrated outside of the bare basics of Christmas/New Year (which I am trying my hardest to forget lol), so I couldn’t say.

Sorry!

New Asks:

10/10 thought, would fantasize again.

Though would also accept MC Audrey just doing some “spring cleaning” of the whole staff in general. I have no idea how she’d replace Jeremy since he’s the company’s poster boy but most of the writers have to go at the very least and Jeremy should be given less power.

I think MC Audrey would appreciate how Kagami carries herself, though potential bonus if - while Tom and Sabine just openly trust whatever Marinette wants - Audrey does a bunch of digging to make sure Kagami is “worthy” of being with Marinette (she takes this all very seriously).

Double potential bonus if Kagami takes it just as seriously, so here’s Audrey and Kagami acting as if Kagami dating Marinette is like some sort of job interview.

Kagami handing over a “resume” of her accomplishments to Audrey. Audrey has already looked all of it up herself but appreciates the effort put in.

If the question in Miraculous is, “Do we really need a--” and the thing being introduced is something the staff came up with then the answer is usually “no.”

The movie will look pretty and that’s all I’ll expect. It’s just Jeremy’s take on Miraculous. Luka and Kagami probably won’t even be around so I’m not even interested.

I’ll watch it, but I’m also not interested lol.

Honestly, I’d rather turn into bubble froth.

oddly specific but... I mean, damn

I have no idea, and I try not to throw around words like “spite ship” because I know people could genuinely like the ship, though I will say that I went on AO3 and - unless I read from - the first Maribat fanfiction on there was posted after the airdate of “Chameleon.” I think it might’ve started with inspiration from “Marinette moves schools” ideas at the very least.

Non-Miraculous Asks responding to previous posts:

Oh, I understood, no worries! It was just funny for the split second it took me to figure it out.

My bad, that’s not how I meant to come off (especially since “magical girl shows” is a little broad; I mean, obviously I don’t think something like Cardcaptor Sakura is aiming for fanservice when Sakura’s--like... ten). I answered all those asks in the last askplosion in the same day so my brain was a little fried by the time I got to that ask.

I’m not even talking about Sailor Moon either; it’s just that I knew there are shows with fanservice and there are certain magical girl outfits where I kind of give the side-eye.

Absolutely zero problem with girls fighting in pretty outfits though. I fully admit that I’m a bit of a prude so sometimes I see fanservice where there might not be any. Super short skirts without shorts, for example, inherently throw me off (shout-out to Saint Tail - which I discovered while looking up “pretty magical girl outfits” - because the main character does have a skirt in “magical girl” form but also tights/boots and a cute hat, which is one of the more unique ones I’ve seen).

Non-Miraculous Asks:

Do you mean Sailor Moon Crystal? Yeah, the only reason I hesitate on Sailor Moon in general is because I’m not crazy about the transformed designs. It’s not really a matter of animation but more a design choice that takes me out of the experience.

I have seen all of Cardcaptor Sakura anime though, and then all of the Clear Card arc. I like the former, despise the latter, and I tried to keep up with the manga but once one of the big plot details were revealed, I officially dropped it.

As for Revolutionary Girl Utena, I looked it up a while ago and don’t remember what exactly turned me away. It might’ve been the darker tone though if what you say is accurate that it’s a darker take on a magical girl show.

Also, I may or may not have looked up the ending of at least Princess Tutu and I’m sorry, I’m sure it’s a great anime, but if there isn’t a happy ending then I give whatever anime a hard pass.

(note: yes, I realize the hilarity of saying that when I continue watching Miraculous)

-

(More Madoka Magica talk/salt below!)

Ohhh, it started a trend? I had no idea since I don’t actively keep up with every anime out there; descriptions need to really pull me in (the only current anime I’m keeping up with is Hanyou no Yashahime, Otherside Picnic, and Cells at Work (Season 2)).

The focus on specific--uh--body parts in magical girl transformations also reminds me that I think that’s usually what kills it for me, not because of the sexualization but because I expect transformations (especially ones that get repeated over and over) to be really dynamic with changing angles and such, which is harder to do when the camera is trying to draw focus to specific places.

Obviously you have to do it for some moments (I’ve always imagined Miraculous transformations like a potential sheep or another one for rabbit, then rabbit!Jean from Leave for Mendeleiev and fox!Juleka from LadyBugOut) because things will be weird if you focus on nothing, but I think there are ways to draw the eye without trying to sexualize.

Not having Ladybug-esque bodysuits is a good start. It reminds me too much of the Catwoman with just a bodysuit so it leaves nothing to the imagination.

How did I forget about that Sayaka scene? omg (though I dunno if the Bechdel Test is hard to pass if there aren’t really any endgame male love interests? are there rules about that? not saying a pass isn’t a pass but it feels like cheating)

It is nice when fans can respect the opinions of others without having to outright attack. I have had a few people come to me with, “I see your point/respect it even if I disagree,” instead of accusing me/others of--well, you get it.

Fandoms can be really messy, particularly as they get larger. I think there’s a certain balance between small fandoms that all know each other and a big fandom that’s out of control. Then there are things like “loud minority” and it’s just uggggh.

Anyway, back to the asks themselves, yeah, I’m not crazy about taking things that are just meant to be positive/cute/whatever and being like, “OKAY BUT WHAT IF IT WAS EDGY AND SAD.”

n o ,  p l z

Oh, I’ve never heard of that one!

Sayaka dying didn’t really do anything for me either. It’s hard to explain when I saw it so long ago, but it was just Sayaka’s attitude about the whole thing and it made it feel underwhelming. It was a shame too because I liked her and she had potential.

She was Madoka’s friend so I was just like, “Yeah, she’ll die soon.” Probably didn’t help since I knew what I knew about the show being “dark.”

Madoka/Sayaka is probably what I’d support the most out of all the potential shoujo ai ships. To my knowledge, none of them are really canon, though I remember a special song after the death Sayaka and Kyoko which I guess makes them the most canon and that did basically nothing for me since their relationship didn’t interest me (nor did I care for Kyoko as a character). The PSP game might have more intimate potential between the girls, but I never played them so I can’t make those claims (I only remember something about everyone potentially living and then a bad ending for Sayaka where part of her body was decayed when they didn’t get her soul gem back in time).

The tomboy argument makes me think back to a conversation with a friend of mine where we were discussing tomboys in anime and... we couldn’t really think of any? At least any that really qualify as “tomboy” for me.

Like, Misty from Pokemon, for example. I knoooooow everyone really likes Misty, but regardless of my opinion on her, it’s hard to see her as a tomboy.

I feel like they try to lean that way by making her super aggressive and violent (because... m E N) and I think Ash makes a comment once about her not being “like a girl,” but... I feel like that’s just how general “aggressive” female characters are written?

I mean, that’s tsundere female characters I’ve seen in general. Really loud (and not in a “gIrlS aRe sO lOuD aND ScReEcHY” way but like... the way anime gives them big heads while they scream at whatever male character they’re mad at), angry a lot, short fuse, etcetera.

But Misty is still crazy about clothes and dolls, she still gushes about cute things and romance, and both of those things seem pretty indicative of what “standard girl character” would be defined by, since they’re all “stereotypically girl thing” (I say stereotypically for obvious reasons since boys can like blah and girls can like blah and gender exclusivity is blah--). I get that she dresses differently, but that’s about it, and it comes off like, “she dresses differently and she’s ANGRY and VIOLENT, so she’s a tomboy,” which... yeah. They even gave her three beauty queen sisters with CURVES and BUSTS as if to say, “See?? These are GIRLS, not TOMBOYS.” (busty females can exist who are also tomboys, thank you have a nice day).

This becomes more complicated in magical girl anime since girly clothes are usually part of that so “tomboy” means that frills and skirts probably wouldn’t be a factor.

I mean, if you gave those sorts of outfits to me, I’d be like, “SCREW IT, I’M NOT A MAGICAL GIRL ANYMORE. IF LOOKING PRETTY IS REDUCED TO SKIRTS AND FRILLS, SOMEONE ELSE CAN SAVE THE WORLD.”

I’d also like to see some mixes between personalites and “tomboy” things. Like, non-stereotypical tomboy personalities doing tomboy things. Mix and match, y’know?

This was really rambly, but to answer the question... no, I wouldn’t count Sayaka as a tomboy.

All of this.

I think it also exemplifies the whole “dark and edgy magical girl show” thing because... ugh, how do I put this...

The “girls are overly emotional” thing is already bad, but then you realize that there not being any magical boys is also because that doesn’t hit the “shock value” threshold as much.

Y’know, because boys equal dark and edgy shows, so if there was even one magical boy it wouldn’t be as shocking when Mami gets her head chomped. They could’ve done, “emotional teenagers are the target because they’re in that vulnerable stage; smarter and more physically capable than children, but not as mature/stable as adults,” but having some boys in there for balance (it makes me feel weird saying that when I’m all for girl power shows with an all female cast, but in this show’s logic, it’s a different ball game) would make the show seem less bright and “girly” and thus lessen the shock value.

Does that make sense?

[purplesurveys]

1269

Last thing you bought online? Did you like it? OMG OMG so I got Angela an Army Bomb!!!!!! for her birthday!!!! It was HELLLL looking for sealed ones that were already onhand, but fortunately I was able to find one from this really nice seller a few days ago and the shipping was quick as well. I’m just a little worried because the outbox has a little dent on it :( but it was the best onhand offer I could find so I got it before anybody could call dibs. I still hope she likes it! I got her batteries too so that she can try lighting it up as soon as she has it. :D

Could you date someone who didn’t drive (and didn’t show an interest in ever getting their license, either)?  I feel like this is such a petty thing to make a big deal about...if they knew how to commute or any other way to get to their destination, I don’t think this should be a problem. It would only be an issue to me if they refused to get a license in a very I-generally-lack-ambition kind of way.

How would you react if your artwork became famous?  I don’t have any to show off to begin with. I love appreciating art, but creating it was never a forte of mine.

Would you get your nipples pierced?  No, I don’t plan on getting any piercings. How many people know your birthday?  Outside of my family, my best friends. I think everyone else relies on Facebook to be reminded, which is fine with me.

Has anyone ever tried to ruin a relationship you were in?  No. Quite the contrary, really...I was sometimes informed about red flags taking place, which of course my stubborn ass ignored.

Have you ever watched a whole hour long infomercial?  Probably, as a kid. The channel from which I used to watch WWE aired these really long infomercials so I would watch those while waiting for like Raw or whatever show was going on after.

What is your current MySpace song?  I never hung out on Myspace. I had an account, but I was too young for it so it wasn’t long before I got bored.

What is your favorite kind of meat to put on your sandwich?  Pulled pork or fried chicken.

Which one of your exes do you feel like you have the most chemistry with?  I only have one ex.

How do you feel about people who make Facebook profiles for their pets? I find it really cute. But I personally wouldn’t put in as much effort lol.

Have you ever personally known a pair of conjoined twins?  Hmmmmmmmm I don’t think so.

What was the most disturbing thing you have ever heard your mother say? She threatened suicide in front of me and my dad in a very calm way when I was around 11, I think? Maybe 12, idk. I haven’t actually thought about that moment in an extremely long time until this question. I’ll move on now and shove the memory at the very very back of my head before I get sad.

Is there something in particular you like to look at photos of? What is it?  Aside from members of BTS (lol), interior design inspirations.

Chewy chocolate-chip cookies: like or dislike?  Ooh, love. When I bite into a cookie it hassssss to ooze chocolate, otherwise I would be underwhelmed.

If your boyfriend/girlfriend wanted to dress only in the opposite sex’s clothing, would you support that? If not, would you leave them?  Support.

Do you think your grandmother is/was beautiful?  They both are.

Which of your fields of interest are you a total expert on?  Anything that has to do with writing (except poems), I guess? I like being able to give people advice and tips when it comes to that.

When was the last time you got all dolled up?  Last July when we had a big PR media launch thingy and I couldn’t afford to look like shit on Zoom.

Do you ever name objects? (i.e. mp3 players, guitars, cars, etc.)  Never.

Do you have a criminal record?  Not criminal but it’s possibleeeee that I have some kind of record on my license from the time I got stopped by an officer in Alabang, lmao. It was a minor offense from a tiny part of the town so I don’t actually know if they filed it, but it’s possible.

Last person you took a nap with?  I don’t really nap with other people. I hate falling asleep in front of others to begin with.

Does seeing your mother cry automatically make you feel sad as well?  No.

Do you think someone likes the same person you like?  I don’t like anybody.

Do you want your life to stay the way it is right now forever?  No, I do not want to stay in a pandemic and not get to maximize my life the way it’s supposed to be enjoyed forever.

Have you ever been to craigslist.com?  I’ve never checked it out; idk if we have that here?

What about eBay?  I also dunno if they operate here so no, I’ve never bothered.

Have you ever used Nair?  Not Nair, but I’ve used Veet before.

Are you medicated?  Nope.

Do you shape/fill in your eyebrows?  I never do stuff to my eyebrows except shave them.

Have you ever stolen/borrowed clothes from an ex?  Several articles of clothing were left behind here, yeah. I never had the chance to give them back because I stupidly thought we were going to get back together eventually. By the time I moved on the timing was already off, so the clothes stayed with me untillll...just a few days ago, actually – when I finally cleaned up my room and got rid of a bunch of knickknacks that accumulated here over the years, including all her shirts and sweaters and stuff.

Could you make a statement about anything political?  The 2022 presidential election landscape looks like complete shit and I’m nearly at that point where I want to stop giving a fuck about this country’s future.

Do you think you’ve already met your soulmate?  No.

Do you get the feeling something good will happen in your life soon?  I think I’m already living in it, haha.

Do you enjoy romantic movies, even when they’re cliche?  Sure, but cliché is also hit and miss for me. I love Titanic and Love Actually, but I cannot stand movies like Me Before You and The Notebook. I guess it depends on certain executions, like the acting, screenplay, casting, etc.

Have you been to McDonald’s in the past month?  No, not inside. We did drive-thru within the last month, though.

Have you ever slept over at your best friend’s house?  Not at Andi’s, but I have at Angela’s.

How often do you go bowling?  Extremely rarely. I can’t tell you the last time I went bowling.

Last time you were in an apartment?  Like 2007 when I visited my aunt back when she still lived in one. None of my friends have their own apartments.

Have you ever seen a live seahorse?  I don’t think so.

Would you like to have your own yacht? I mean I wouldn't say no if you offered it to me for free, but I'm not exactly interested in one. < Same.

Winnie the Pooh or Tigger?  Tigger always made me laugh as a kid.

What’s the unhealthiest thing you’ve eaten today?  Luncheon meat, I think? I didn’t go overboard with the junk food today.

Has a stranger ever offered to buy you a drink?  Hm, not that I can recall.

What is something you’d be happy to receive as a gift, that doesn’t cost a lot?  A bag of the salted egg chips that I really like costs like 30 bucks, or roughly 60 US cents.

What kind of music does your significant other/crush like to listen to?  I don’t have any irl crushes, can I use a celebrity crush instead? HAHA he’s heavily into jazz and whenever he gets asked for music recos he always gives jazz artists from like the 50s and 60s.

Who did you have your first kiss with? Do you remember what colour his/her eyes were?  Gab. Dark brown.

Are there any themes from TV shows that you like to sing along to? The Big Bang Theory and Friends; and then I also liked humming to the themes of Breaking Bad, The Walking Dead, and BoJack Horseman. The Phineas & Ferb theme was also a lot of fun to sing along to.

Do you eat dessert after dinner? No, I never do that. I’m usually already full after dinner, and we don’t always have sweets at home anyway.

Have you ever had too much to drink and felt embarrassed about your behavior the next day?  Sure.

When you go out drinking, what do you prefer to drink?  Cocktails. I very rarely go for hard drinks/shots, especially if I brought my own car.

What was the last animal that you saw?  Dog.

What was the last thing that you said to one of your siblings?  I just told my sister I was done using her laptop so she can have it back. My Memories of 2020 DVD turned out to be region-locked so I have to use her laptop every time I want to watch it :(

What is the most expensive thing that you’ve purchased that you paid for:  My Map of the Soul photobook cost me around 5k in total.

What is your favorite messaging program?  Messenger.

Do you eat fast food more than 5 times a week?  Wow no. Aside from being extremely unhealthy, that’s also a LOT of spending??

Have you ever almost drowned?  Yes.

Have you ever learned something shocking about someone through Facebook?  I mean I’ve had to learn about more than one family death through my Facebook feed, which sucks but is nothing I have control over. Otherwise the most shocking thing I’ve seen is probably classmates from high school having their own kids, but at this point I’m used to it already.

What’s the scariest living animal that you’ve petted?  I’m not really afraid of carrying/petting animals especially if there’s a guide or expert nearby, but the most daring one was probably the crocodile I volunteered to hold in Palawan.

Do you remember the first conversation you ever had with the person you currently have feelings for?  Not at all.

Do you dread certain days of the week? If yes, what day/s and why?  I hate Mondays for obvious reasons lol. I don’t know anyone who is actively cheery about reporting back to work.

If you eat oatmeal, do you have it plain or do you have certain toppings that you like to add to it?  I never eat oatmeal. I had that every single day for breakfast from like kindergarten to 4th grade and I vowed never to take a spoonful of it again.

What is the funniest or strangest thing you’ve ever heard somebody say in their sleep?  I dunno. I used to keep a log of the things my ex used to say in her sleep and a great deal of them were hilarious, but obviously I deleted that note a long time ago.

Choose one - Butterfinger, Milky Way, Snickers:  Butterfinger.

Do you use Mozilla Firefox? Nopes.

Who is your favorite person to hug? Angela and Laurice.

Have you ever had to have a mug shot?  Nope.

What was the last thing you carried to your room?  Kimi.

When was the last time you had a late night phone call?  WELL over a year ago.

[winetae]

⇨ wall to wall (02)

↳ 1.2k preview. read the first part here. 

:: female reader x jhs

:: smut, porn star! au

:: ~18k

:: sex work, insecurity, jealousy, slut shaming/objectification, boyfriend!jimin, filmed role played scenario that includes: d/s dynamics - dom!hoseok, anal sex, sex toys, erotic massages, humiliation, porn dirty talk, squirting, lots of cum (and oil!)

It physically pains you to admit it but Seokjin’s worrying isn’t unfounded. Your career is stagnant, your projects predictable and boring. You’re not bad at your job, but you don’t stand out amidst the sea of pretty girls hoping to make a name for themselves.

There’s no guarantee that Director Ryu’s new project will be as successful as the first. You’re no stranger to false hopes; there’s a chance that Seokjin’s wishful thinking might never amount to anything. Even so, you want to give it a shot. Not trying feels too much like giving up and giving up is not an option you’re willing to consider, not when you’ve already put so much on the line.

.

.

.

.

They’ve really gone all out this time, you muse as you cast a cursory glance at your surroundings. A small, electric waterfall fountain sits in the far right corner and crimson colored scented candles are dispersed all around the elaborate massage parlor set-up, dousing the room in a cosy, amber glow. It’s a surprising sight because porn sets are famous for never focusing on the details. Viewers are here for the sex, not the generic backdrop of a rented room or hotel suite.

Director Ryu vehemently protests.

“That’s precisely what sets apart my works from your average pornography film. I want the viewer to be completely immersed in the movie they’re watching. Porn is too constricting and underwhelming a word. What I’m creating is a feast for the eyes, one that leaves a lasting impression after consumption.”

“Ah... Yes.” You try (and fail) to sound impressed.  

“People want to believe the sex is real, even if it’s just for an hour.” He sighs deeply, sounding pained, like explicating such a simple fact isn’t worthy of his time. “They need the escape and it’s our job to make it happen. A few extra candles might not make a colossal difference at first glance. But that’s where you’re wrong! It’s never been about the candles. It’s about the ambiance! The visual experience!”

It’s a pity the new budget doesn’t extend to your wardrobe, you remark internally as your gaze drops to observe the stylists’ pick of the day.

For the upcoming scene, you’ve been instructed to squeeze into a tight, baby pink shirt that stretches obscenely over your bust like something straight out of a frat boy’s wet dream. Inwardly, you congratulate yourself for hitting the gym religiously because your clothes—or lack thereof—put everything on display. The cotton material of your shirt is so thin, you’re surprised the stitches haven’t popped out, while the denim bottoms you sport are so tiny that you could hardly qualify them as shorts. Although—you suppose that there isn’t any use debating over semantics. It’s not as if they’ll stay on long enough for it to matter.

The scenario that you’ll be acting out today is pretty straight-forward. You stop by the parlor to cash in a voucher gifted by a generous and thoughtful friend. Hoseok, who plays the role of an erotic masseuse, gives you a deep tissue body massage worthy of a five star review on Yelp.

Director Ryu is extremely proud of the pitch. His spectacles glint as he pushes them up the bridge of his long nose.

“We’re gonna call it My Bare Lady. Haha, get it?” He gloats. “It’ll be different from our last shoot - the both of you aren’t supposed to be acquainted with each other at all. In fact, there won’t be any romance. We’re aiming for something new because as artists, it’s our duty to reinvent ourselves every day. Complacency is the enemy of creativity.”

At the mention of Hoseok, your gaze flits over in his direction.

His brown hair, two shades lighter than the last time you’d run into him, is swept to the side, giving him a professional and tidy appearance. He’s swapped his workout attire for beige scrub pants and a matching shirt. The color compliments the glow of his tan and the cut of the uniform is flattering to his figure. Diretor Ryu’s speech continues despite your wavering focus.

“—visual stimulation. That’s why one shouldn’t underestimate the proper use of props. A believable setting sets the tone for the rest of the scene. If you don’t believe the role you’ve been given, then why should the audience?”

“Mhm,” you nod here and there but you’ve long stopped paying attention to his one-sided speech.

Your eyes linger on Hoseok’s arms and the dimples that appear every time he laughs. You’re not the only one who stares. A small group of admirers flock to him like bees swarming around a rare and exotic flower.

You’d noticed it before but today confirms it; Hoseok’s presence is riveting. It’s not the first time today your gaze has strayed his way. More than once, you find your eyes drawn to him like a moth to a flame only to quickly avert your gaze whenever your eyes meet. Each time, the right side of his mouth quirks into a half-smile, the beginning of a question forming on his lips.

It’s embarrassing to be caught red-handed gawking but, in your defense, you aren’t the only one who ogles him—and many of them are far less discreet than you try to be, some gazes curious, others downright lecherous.

It bothers you. What exactly do you and everyone else find so fascinating about his character? He’s good-looking, sure—but you’re no stranger to handsome and pretty co-stars with nicely shaped dicks. You can’t put a finger on what sets him apart from the rest.

The gaffer comes over and momentarily interrupts the flow of Director Ryu’s monologue with a personal inquiry. Thank God. You use the opportunity to slip away, grateful that someone has put an end to your misery. As thankful as you are to the director for the career opportunity, you could do without his long-winded speeches that never seem to end.  

“Hey, Hoseok.”

His smile widens, the corners dimpling the moment he spots you. “Hey! It’s been a while. Who would’ve thought we’d get to work again so soon, huh?”

“I didn’t think our last movie would do so well, honestly.”

Without its success, who knows what kind of movie you’d be participating in right now? Another re-hashed version of ‘BABYSITTER GETS CREAMED’ type scenario, most probably.

“I guess that’s a testament to your acting skills, right?”

You smile back, sheepish but nevertheless pleased. It always feels nice to be complimented, especially on days like today when you’re feeling less confident than usual.

“You changed up your hair.”

“Yeah! I thought I needed a change.” He threads his fingers through his locks self-consciously. “It looks fine, right?”

“It does!” you agree with an enthusiastic nod.

Jimin, who had insisted to be present on set today, hovers on the edge of your periphery. In the back of your mind you know he means well—that his presence is meant to be a source of support and security. On a typical day, you’re relieved that someone you trust is close by in case the situation escalates. While you’ve never had any horrific experiences, there have been the occasional uncomfortable encounters behind the scenes. Thankfully, Seokjin or Jimin have always stepped in before whichever entitled asshat could get too handsy.

But for the first time, his presence doesn’t comfort you the way it usually does.

.

.

dun dun dun cue the porn and the drama 🤪

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: The League of Evil Exes

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS!)

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World is one of the greatest cult classics of the 2010s for a wide variety of reasons: it had great performances, it got a video game adaptation that didn’t suck, it had an awesome soundtrack, and best of all, it apparently ruined an entire generation of women! What couldn’t this movie do (besides make a profit at the box office)? Of course, more than anything, this movie delivered on the promise of its premise by having Scott Pilgrim fight against the seven evil exes of his manic pixie dream girl Ramona Flowers.

That’s right: There’s not one, not two, not three, but seven villains to talk about in this movie!

Thankfully, this massive amount of villains makes it a lot easier to talk about them, because each of them basically gets only a single scene with which to establish their characterization and deliver a fun, exciting battle. Still, it’s pretty interesting to look at them, especially since not all exes are created equal. As a note, I’m obviously not doing a “Best Scene” for these guys because... they basically have one scene each. It would be redundant.

Motivation/Goals: The League of Evil Exes has a very simple goal: to control the future of Ramona’s love life. As Lucas says during his battle with Scott: “The Seven Evil Exes? Coming to kill you? Controlling the future of Ramona's love life?” This is especially funny because Lucas is probably the least evil of the lot. While this is an incredibly simple motivation, it fits with the tone of the movie; this is a sort of a Bowser-esque motivation, one that perfectly fits a movie that is so steeped in video game culture.

Performance: Lets go one by one here:

Satya Bhabha is the first of the evil exes, Matthew Patel, and he really eases you into what to expect for the rest of the evil exes, though here “eases you into” means “grabs you by the balls and swings you over the head like a chimpanzee.” Despite his meager screentime, he makes the most of it, delivering a Bollywood-esque musical number complete with fireballs and demon hipster chicks and generally just hamming it up. This right here is just a warmup, though, because things get crazier from here – just like in a video game, really.

Lucas Lee, the second evil ex, is a big-shot movie star regarded as a pretty good actor by all who see him. Unfortunately, they got some unknown weirdo named Chris Evans to play him, but casting this obscure indie actor certainly paid off, because Lucas Lee’s smug, over-confident portrayal combined with his affable nature make him one of the most enjoyable characters in the movie. He really comes off as a cool, cocky guy who just happens to be going up against our hero as opposed to being an actual antagonizing force.

Todd Ingram is the other best evil ex, and much like Lee it’s mostly because he’s a pretty nice guy. However, the key difference is while Lee was cocky and affable, Ingram is just kind of a ditz. Played by one-time Superman Brandon Routh, he opts to go for the more subuded route, a cold ham as opposed to a large ham, and he definitely makes it work; I did call him the OTHER best evil ex, after all.

Then we come to Roxy Richter, played by Katara herself, Mae Whitman. She’s a very angry, tomboyish lesbian who gets in a lot of great lines and shows off a very jaded, irritated personality in her limited screentime. She’s definitely a lot of fun, though apparently she has a lot of elements of Envy Adams due to being combined with an early idea to make her Ramona’s evil ex in the movie.

The Katayanagi Twins. Ken and Kyle, are… nothing. Because Keita and Shota Saitou (Kyle and Ken, respectively) did not speak English, the twins have no lines and don’t really get to establish much of a presence before dying. It’s a bit unfortunate, because it becomes really easy to forget these two are here as a result.

Gideon Gordon Graves is a smarmy, smug, condescending jackass. You have met a man like him before, and you have wanted to punch his face in. Jason Schwartzman really amps up the sleaze when playing this creepy, controlling bastard, making him a fitting final boss.

Final Fate: Each and every one of them is defeated by the end of their scenes, bursting into progressively larger amounts of coins, with Patel being pretty meager in terms of value and Gideon literally making it rain when he’s defeated. It does kind of feel weird that the twins are worth more than a beloved actor like Lucas Lee, or that Roxy is worth more than both Lee and a musician like Ingram, but frankly this isn’t really a movie where you should be overthinking stuff to begin with.

Best Quote: I don’t think I can really say Patel or Gideon have amazing, quotable lines to the extent as some of the others, but I’d be pretty remiss to not mention Todd’s legendary “...Chicken isn’t vegan…?” and Roxy’s equally legendary “Well honey… I’m a little bi-FURIOUS!” here. Lucas Lee has a lot of good lines but he’s quite frankly too consistent for me to pick one; Chris Evans really just went all-out for this one.

Final Thoughts & Score: Once again, let’s go one by one:

Matthew Patel

Matthew is the definition of a warmup boss, at least by the standards of this film. He brings a lot of insanity to the table all at once, what with his demons and Bollywood musical number and sick dance moves, but the fact he’s probably not the most insane and baffling character in the film really tells you something. He definitely makes the most of his screentime, and while his fight is relatively short, it’s a lot of fun. This man deserves an S-L-ICK 8/10.

Lucas Lee

Lucas Lee is probably the second best evil ex in the movie. He’s just so cocky, arrogant, and hilarious, and he still manages to come off as a bit polite. Its like if Captain America and Ransom Drysdale had a baby, Lucas Lee would be it. The fact he’s played by a pre-superstardom Chris Evans really is the icing on the cake here though, because his battle is fun and ends with Scott defeating him by playing into his arrogance. Ah! But he didn’t get his autograph… Oh well. Lucas Lee is an easy 10/10.

Todd Ingram

As much as I love Lee, I have to say that Todd easily has the most impressive fight in the entire film, in large part due to his awesome psychic powers he gains from being a vegan. I gave one of his legendary quotes up there, but frankly, the entire battle is awesome and quotable, the fact that at least half the battle is a rock-off is great, and the fact Scott tricks him in the most stupidly amazing to defeat him and put him at the mercy of the Vegan Police is just amazing. There’s also just the sheer novelty of how, with the power in hindsight, we got to see Superman (Routh) dating Captain Marvel (Brie Larson portrayed Envy, Scott’s ex and Todd’s girlfriend and bandmate). Todd is just a perfect, lovable idiot villain, and deserves nothing less than a 10/10.

Roxy Richter

Roxy actually gets to show up twice in the film, getting a brief scene with Scott a while before her identity is revealed. While her screentime doesn’t really amount to much, it really is incredible how much characterization they managed to pack into her limited screentime, her dialogue really selling how she is easily the most bitter and angry off all the exes. She seems genuinely hurt at some points that Ramona left her and considers her just a phase, though this of course doesn’t stop her from trying to ruin her life. In a weird way, I’d almost call her the most complex of the exes, and Mae Whitman does a great job at selling her. I will say though, despite her fight scene being filled with some of the best dialogue in the film (which is saying a lot, mind you), the overall fight is a little lackluster, and Ramona getting in makes it reek of “designated girl fight.” Still, there’s nothing so egregious about her that I’d give her anything less than a 9/10.

The Katayanagi Twins

These two, quite simply, suck. They get absolutely no characterization, they get no dialogue due to the actors not speaking English, they get no personality. They are, quite simply, just there, and they are just there because Scott needs to fight a fifth and sixth ex. There’s really not much to say here except that their fight scene is admittedly pretty cool and it’s fun to imagine how the hell their relationship with Ramona worked. Did they date her one after the other? Were they in a weird poly relationship? Did they both just spitroast her on the weekends? For those two things I’ll save them from the very bottom of the barrel and give them a 2/10.

Gideon Gordon Graves

Gideon is a smug, evil, controlling creep for sure, and he is the final evil ex Scott must face. But the thing is, he kind of doesn’t feel any more wieighty than any of the others? Gideon is for all intents and purposes the final boss, and while he does get a little buildup, it all comes in the final acts of the film. It certainly doesn’t make him a bad villain – he actually manages to temporarily kill Scott, and puts up more of a fight than any of the others – but considering how awesome Todd, Lucas, Roxy, and Matthew were in style and personality, Gideon kind of comes off as underwhelming. Yes, he is definitely the most evil of the exes, but he just doesn’t really have the “WOW” factor the others do. He’s an 8/10 for sure.

Well, I guess that’s it, that’s every villain in the mo-

Wait?

What’s this?!

Psycho Analysis: Nega Scott

…

[kamikui]

Onmyoji Movie

HI so I watched the Onmyoji Movie based off of the game last night and . . . . that sure was something!

In all honesty despite the weird path they decided to take, I actually enjoyed the movie. The music and detail in the scenery was amazing, I LOVED the costuming for a lot of the background characters esp in the Demon Realm, and a lot of the easter eggs that were hidden were nice. 

BUT. but. As someone heavily invested in the lore of the game (especially concerning Ibaraki) how they decided to deal with the movie was like. really confusing. It genuinely felt as if NE gave the directors a cast of characters and let them do what they wanted from there w/o any prior knowledge of the game.

(spoilers down below)

Before I really pry into that though, I’ll kinda note some of the characters.

Seimei/Qingming was actually my favorite. I think this is sort of an unpopular opinion right now, but his characterization was so nice even if it sorta leans into the basic drama hero type personality. In the game Seimei is supposed to be you/the player, and not everyone is going to have the same interpretation of him-- and that’s what the movie felt like, a different interpretation. I will say I didn’t really like them making him related to their version of Orochi. I believe the snakes name was Xiangliu? I can’t remember, but I didn’t see the reason in that. 

If anything, keeping him a fox and having a version of Tamamo no Mae popping up to offer advice to help with the situation would’ve been nicer, and that’d keep more of Seimei’s backstory kept in tact-- because asides from him becoming an Onmyoji apprentice at a young age we literally do not know shit about him. And legit I wouldn’t necessarily mind bc it’s a movie, you’re not going to get everyone’s backstory within 2 hrs, but we can’t really get attached to him.

Yao Bikuni/Baini was. Hm. I like her as a character in the movie, but I don’t like where she’s placed as a character in the movie. She’s a Seer? in the game and tbh it should’ve stayed that way, like I honestly can’t see her willingly working for one clan. “But how would she--” In game she is also influenced by Seimei pretty heavily, as in the in game chapters she believed he would be able to kill her. Up until she got manipulated by Orochi, she stuck to his side. With the Stone plot in the movie, if it put him in danger she would be there in order to try and help him, OR, try and pull him to join Orochi if they went that route. And they KINDA tried to hint at it when Seimei “died” with Orochi using her image, but like. come on man. Let Yao be evil for a little bit.

That being said I didn’t like the Master & Shikigami bit with those two, or the implied romance they tried to pull with them. Canonically Seimei legit brushes her off and when shes like “ohhh you’ll kill me right” hes like “lol sure” and thats IT. Literally any form of romance that’s tried at Seimei he brushes it off. he’s not into it he’s an amnesiac.

The “Oh if you become my shikigami you won’t become evil” thing was :/ to me as well because again, canonically, even though Seimei is being taunted he can contain the Kitsune part pretty well even when he wasn’t aware he was kitsune. Like I think the part as a kid was a good bit to add since it’s when he’s first being exposed to Onmyoji type stuff, but like. idk idk I couldn’t vibe with that power dynamic while they were trying to hint romance.

Continuing on with Hiromasa/Yuan Boya and Kagura/Shenle, again considering this is a movie, I’m somewhat content with their characters.

I really liked how energetic this Kagura was, and given they weren’t able to do her actual backstory, I liked the one she was given. Her introduction in the movie was really great too-- and compared to Hiromasa I felt they gave her a little more attention? Which like fine, but not so good for Hiro.

They didn’t even. Discuss his archery skills at any point which was disappointing. The most plot relevance he (and honestly Kagura too) had was finding Seimei while trying to arrest him but that’s it. And yes they showed some of his skill while he was fighting Kamaitachi, but that’s the extent of it. AGAIN i’ll consider the fact this was a movie and they didn’t have enough time to fit EVERYTHING in, but since they gave Yao and Seimei so much attention you would think they’d be able to spare some for the other two protagonists in the game. 

Before I leave those two tho I’m still trying to figure out what the fuck happened in the end. Like did hiromasa get promoted in some form? was he given credit for what happened between the demon realm? Why did he separate from Kagura since they got close during the movie? I guess like bc work duties but still. I have no idea tho like i was sitting there not processing a single thing. Regardless I did like Hiro and Kags acting like siblings despite in this canon them not being related (at least it’s never clarified).

Ok so before I dive into the whole mess that is the Cimu/”Ibaraki” character, stuff on side characters.

While I didn’t like the outfits for Sakura(? Momo? Both of them?) or Chocho, I liked the roles that they held as sort of trainers for the rest of Seimeis shikigami. In fact I liked the whole courtyard ordeal in general. I have my own worldbuilding thing that has a similar theme so seeing it being used canonically was pretty nice. I do wish we could’ve seen more SSRs or even SRs though. Like, why couldn’t Aoandon be hanging out in the courtyard to give gossip to Hiro & Kagura? Yamakaze or Shishio hanging out in the forest, or like. bruh even Jikikaeru as the boss in the Showdown considering he runs that in game. 

I did like the fish man! I really did, but literally everything about him could’ve been Jikikaeru, I don’t think it’s that hard to make a frog man. 

Also as mentioned previously it would’ve been nice to see Tamamo make an appearance considering he makes random ones every now and then. The Mujou Brothers could’ve helped the shikigami when they were escaping Seimeis courtyard, Shiranui could’ve been an entertainer while they were traveling through the demon realm, HAKU??? couldve been one of Seimeis shiki?? literally anyone. They have all these misc characters in the background but barely any of them resemble in game characters.

GOD EVEN KOSODENOTE COULDVE BEEN THERE . . . . at the scene where Kagura was messing with jewelry and clothing . . . Koso couldve been the seller. Aobozu could’ve worked at the shrine . . . . I just. Man.

ANYWAYS . . . pulling from that and going into whatever the hell Cimu is. god.

So according to casting, Cimu is supposed to be Ibaraki. But the thing is. There’s only like. 3-4 Elements about Ibaraki that goes into him. Everything else is Shuten which i honestly find pretty funny?? Take away the homophobic jokes and combine the gay coded character into his love interest. Which I mean that’s better than making them brothers but at what cost.

anyways. Cimu previously being an onmyoji but turning evil -> shuten previously being a monk and turning evil. The design of the hand that Cimu uses as transportation -> SP Shutens design where he sits on two hands. Red hair -> shuten. The horns, eye color (minus scleras), arm getting chopped off, and his ambition to grow stronger are really the only parts of Ibaraki that’s in the character-- and even then you could say Shuten has a similar ambition of growing stronger. It’s just so scuffed. 

ALSO IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE. literally it doesn’t make sense when you look at the characters.

Why couldn’t they just stick with Kuro Seimei considering the fact that this Ibaraki works with Ootengus and Yuki Onna/The Snow Queen? They could’ve given Seimei a twin brother to work off of this. But like if they really wanted to keep Ibaraki and Shuten, they could’ve made it that Shuten was being manipulated by Orochi and Ibaraki was serving him, because there’s a LOT of shit you could do just with Shuten by himself. Legit no reason to combine the two since they’re BOTH heavily marketed characters. 

Legit like, Shuten being controlled, given Ibaraki’s loyalty to Shuten he would most likely follow him no matter what, and even like. Have a form of Momiji to kind of help out-- probably at a heavy expense of Shuten doing something for her, but still. like i LOVED the snow queen, I loved this interpretation of yuki so I wouldn’t want to get rid of her, but they shouldve went with Seimei 2 instead of “ibaraki”. It’s just so much and it doesn’t make sense. 

Now orochi himself and how that was handled was like. Okay I guess. If anyone was being talked to through their head at the time it should’ve been Yao Bikuni considering she allies with him in canon at one point. but like whatever. I did think the end was neat where Seimei forced him into becoming his shikigami, like I liked that whole process. Otherwise all antagonists were pretty underwhelming.

I also was not fond of the ending where like Seimei just turns away at the broken bridge. Like does this mean the Demon realm is completely cut off now? just fix the bridge. Also does Seimei just fuck off?? I know theres a scene where he’s standing on the roof but. i dont know. 

Regardless the movie was great, I had fun watching it. When ibaraki came in I accidentally paused the movie a couple of times while spamming screenshots. Even tho hes like kinda ugly but that’s ok. There WERE some angles where he was hot as hell but otherwise they did his actor so dirty. The horns were just. God I won’t delve into that bc this post is long as hell BUT. BUT. THE MOVIE WAS GOOD. just not if ure into the lore for the game LMAO.

Ok that’s it for now bye

[scoobydoominuscoobydoo]

Alright, I guess we should talk about Scoob!

So Scoob! was digitally release nearly a month ago and Mod Silas and I finally got around to watching it. 

For anyone who liked it and don’t wanna read me heavily criticize it then I’ll just spoil you right now:

I did not like Scoob! at all.

And it was really disappointing because this is the first wide release film Scooby has gotten in 16 years. That’s a long time to think of bringing Scooby to the general public who don’t go out of their way to watch every single direct-to-video movie. The announcement of a new feature length film was two or three years ago and I was really excited to hear it because I was expecting some high-quality content.

My opinion of it quickly dropped a lot when it was revealed that the original voice cast wouldn’t be in it. That’s fine all on it’s own but they did it without even letting the original cast know they wouldn’t be a part of this (Besides Frank but he wasn’t even cast as who he originally played). Seeing both Matthew and Grey’s responses to this made me sad and I was significantly less excited for this movie. 

Suddenly the concept of this movie not being that good became very real to me. How much passion can you have for Scooby-Doo when you ignore the original cast and hire people who have never done anything for the franchise before that.

Despite all of that, I was giving Scoob! the benefit of the doubt because I really wanted this movie to be good. I wanted this movie to open up the potential for more major Scooby projects. And while this movie did well financially I find myself so disappointed that after 16 years this is what we got.

Since I hated almost everything about this movie I’m gonna break it up into a numbered list (otherwise I’ll be ranting endlessly).

#1: This movie fails at telling a story.

When the trailer was dropped I remember being like, “Great. Lets recycle the whole Scoob and Shag friendship as a central narrative. Not like they’ve done that a million times before.” And then next thing you know, they’re on the Falcon Fury and I was so not excited. That was two plot-lines they’ve played with before and I can’t remember the last time anyone cared about the Blue Falcon. It’s one of the weaker movies and nobody talks about that one episode of MI that he’s in.

But again, I was going to let it slide because it’s still possible to create a good story out of something recycled.

The movie opens up with them when they were kids and I was already bummed because this movie is taking place in present times and not the 70′s or the 80′s. They allude to the fact that Shaggy enjoys stuff from that time period (while he’s scrolling through a smartphone) but that’s not the same. This concept bugged me for the rest of the movie because the majority of scenes where the gang is solving something they just Google it and the the scene is over. As opposed to it taking place before the internet and writers would have to get creative. And while I love the gang as kids because when it’s done in the show they have so much charm and life the beginning scenes are kinda pointless and don’t establish anything major. I think they were trying to show that the gang have been really close since they were little but it doesn’t come off that way. Not to mention the whole scene with the gang together feels really stiff and I was salty that Shaggy wasn’t wearing a Commander Cool costume instead of his Blue Falcon outfit.

At this point I was waiting for the character conflict to be introduced because that’s a key convention in every Scooby movie. There’s always a man in a mask to chase but that’s not where the story comes together. The story comes from some sort internal conflict within the characters.

The phantom dinosaurs in Legend of the Phantosaur are awesome but that’s not what the movie is about. It’s about Shaggy overcoming his own internal hurdles.

That’s been a consistent pattern in the best of the Scooby films (even all four of the live action ones do this) and I was waiting for it to be identified. And then next thing I know we’re twenty minutes into the movie and I’m not sure what it’s even about. The scene where the gang talk about wanting to become a legitimate business happens so fast and it took me like five minutes to be like, “Wait is this our conflict?” A fight between the gang about Shaggy and Scooby’s usefulness to the cause? (Which is also a recycled plot but whatever.) Their fight happens so fast and isn’t taken all that seriously so Shag and Scoob’s anger seems more played for a laugh than anything else.

But then they cut to the bowling alley and the two of them seem genuinely upset. And I can’t help but think if you had let the earlier scene escalate into an actual argument that I would have bought the hurt feelings. But then none of it matters because Shag and Scoob are immediately attacked and rescued by the Blue Falcon and someone’s OC. And when the rest of the gang find out they instantly feel bad and so I guess the tension between the gang wasn’t supposed to be the central conflict.

Now it’s back to being about Shaggy and Scooby and their millionth time being the chosen one.

Shaggy becomes pretty upset because Scooby is getting into the whole superhero thing and isn’t giving Shag a second thought. But the thing is, none of this was built up. The villain and Simon Cowell tell Shag he isn’t special and both of those times aren’t even remotely emotional. They briefly mention that Shag has some self confidence issues and that turns into him getting mad at Scooby for taking off his collar and playing hero. Ignoring the fact that this is not in character at all it’s clear that the story is now forcing conflict because we’re 45 minutes into the movie and all we’ve done is slapstick.

Shaggy and Scooby’s falling out is ridiculous because they’ve only been mad at each other for like ten minutes of the whole movie so there aren’t any stakes at all. You know they’re gonna make up because this fight came out of nowhere and wasn’t built up at all. Shag and the gang reuniting isn’t emotional at all and Shaggy breaking up the fight could have been so much better if it was just done better.

And that’s how this whole movie is, this plot had the potential to be great scenes could have gotten something from me but nothing is built up and it can’t stay consistent.

By the final battle of the film we’ve only had two things resembling character arcs in Shag and the Blue Falcon and neither of them have any weight. The movie tells us what we already know, that Shaggy is indeed useful to the gang and I just want this movie to be over.

And I guess because they wanna tug on your heartstrings the writers threw in a little self-sacrifice. And I’m not against that at all I think that’s a good resolution to the arc they were trying to give Shaggy but the thing is there’s no stakes or tension in the scene. It just happens and we’re meant to be sad about it but I can’t because nobody else in the scene seems to think it’s all that depressing besides Scooby. And like two minutes later the conflict is resolved and we get our obligatory dance party at the end. 

That whole thing is not a story, nothing is really accomplished by the end and nobody has really gone anywhere. 

There was no Point A which takes us to Point B which brings us to Point C. This was an insane labyrinth of lines running through as many points as they could and then calling it a day. There was no natural progression and none of the conflicts presented even mattered because they were immediately resolved anyway. That makes sense for a TV show but this is a feature length film. I honestly could not believe they were going to release that in theaters because there is no way it’s worth the money. 

It was so devoid of the Scooby-Doo charm and this movie felt more lifeless than anything I’ve watched in a long time.

#2: The movie does a bad job of portraying the gang’s friendship.

One of the fandom’s favorite parts of the Scooby-Doo franchise is the friendship between the gang and the way their characters interact.

But in this movie they behave more like coworkers than anything else. They try to play up the gang feeling guilty and missing the guys but it’s really not convincing. And it’s clear that the fight was more or less to contribute to Velma, Daphne and Fred’s story rather than the whole gang. They spend most of their scenes talking about the mystery or what Shaggy and Scooby would be doing if they were there. The one time in the movie where I can buy them being best friends is when we watch that accidentally took a video instead of a selfie. I thought that was really cute and showed the gang’s dynamic effectively.

The end of the movie where Shaggy is supposedly sealed in the Underworld forever is so underwhelming because Scooby is the only one reacting. Like that’s supposed to be their best friend of ten years who they don’t think they’ll ever see again and they barely bat an eyelash until they go to comfort Scooby.

My first thought was, “There is no way the gang would just let Shaggy sacrifice himself.” And I kept wondering why no one else was trying to stop him or hold him back. 

It’s annoying because I like when the whole gang’s relationship a key part of the plot rather than just Shaggy and Scooby + the other three who are also here.

#3: The villain and the Blue Falcon are pointless.

You could have taken Brian and Dick Dastardly out of the movie and replaced them with anyone and the movie would not have changed at all.

The Blue Falcon squad add nothing to the story and are mainly just there for ......nostalgia I guess??? But nobody even remembers the Blue Falcon??? 

The scenes with Dastardly are easily the worst parts because he’s just a copy-paste villain who sometimes says semi relatable things and it’s meant to be hilarious. His whole plan to open the Underworld just to get his dog back could have been interesting but obviously it wasn’t because nothing is properly built up in this movie.

Their first mistake was immediately revealing who their villain was right off the bat. I won’t be salty that they used actual supernatural forces because Scooby has done that plenty of times. I am salty that they just up and tell you who the puppetmaster is without any goal at anonymity which just goes against everything Scooby is about.

And they’ve done this multiple times. Whenever real supernatural forces are brought into the mix that does change anything because the forces are almost always being controlled by a man in a mask. This sticks to the Scooby belief that the real evil in our world comes from man and not fictional monsters.

#4: This movie’s presentation is not good.

I will quickly say that I actually liked Shaggy’s design in the movie even though Mod Silas already drew Shag with a long sleeve under his shirt and I think that’s a lot better looking. Whatever, I thought he was cute.

I was talking about how stiff the opening scenes felt, well the whole movie looks pretty stiff as well. 

The character designs are distracting (every girl in this movie with their hair down looks like they’re just wearing a wig it looks so bad I don’t understand hair hasn’t looked back in animation for like a decade) and the animation is pretty sloppy. The directing and camera movements also don’t make any half the time and only make everything more jarring. I have nothing against CG animation but I feel like this movie was trying to be 2D in a 3D space and and was just not working out.

Also the voice acting in the movie is really not good. Like idk how this movie managed to get a bad performance out of these pretty renowned actors but none of them sound like they wanna be there or even really care. Which is funny because if they had kept the original cast you know they would have given it 110% since they actually have passion playing these roles. If the performances were actually good I feel like I would have enjoyed the movie a little more.

They also play some standard pop songs and that confused me because they literally played the original theme song at the beginning. Like you guys have the What’s New theme which everyone loves, a plethora of other theme songs, and two Hex Girls songs you could have played. 

When the dance party at the end happens Mod Silas pointed out that it was a wasted opportunity because instead of having the Blue Falcon be a DJ they could have just brought in the Hex Girls or Simple Plan.

But they didn’t do that and I honestly wonder if the people who made this movie care about Scooby-Doo at all.

#5: The things that I actually liked.

Again, I liked that scene where they do that cute selfie thing, I thought was adorable and accurately showed their dynamic.

I also liked that Daphne was the one to point out what Shag and Scoob contribute to the team because I’m biased.

When they address that Shag and Scoob are they ones that make sure the gang is eating I like that, I thought it was very in character and made a lot of sense.

I like when Captain Caveman showed up for literally no reason and was voiced by Tracy Morgan. Simply because it was so dumb I had to laugh.

I like the gang’s group hugs because those always showcase how tall Shag is compared to everyone and they all deserve a hug.

Any of the lines Fred said because they were the majority of the actually funny jokes in the movie.

The scene where Shag, Scoob and Daph are split off and she keeps getting her spare Scooby Snacks stolen by Scooby. I just love that trio for obvious reasons and it was the only part of the movie where I felt happy.

At the end when Shaggy yells at the gang and tells them what to do because I just always like it when he does that, it always throws the rest of the gang off and it’s funny.

The scene where they unmask Dastardly and it’s Simon Cowell and then they unmask Cowell and it’s Dastardly again. Like the smartest joke the movie had.

The Hex Girls poster at the carnival because it tricked me into thinking we’d see them at some point.

I liked DynoMutt, I though his design was cool and he got the other half of the actually funny jokes.

When Blue Falcon does that phone gag and is all like, “Adventure is calling!!” And the scene is supposed to be exciting but then Shag immediately is like, “No thanks.” I thought that was in character and pretty funny before being taken back because conflicts are resolved instantly in this movie.

Conclusion:

When you’re passionate with something as underground as Scooby-Doo you find yourself getting very protective of the legacy it leaves behind.

Granted this franchise has always had some black marks on it’s record but that’s to be expected since it’s a 50 year-old series.

Scoob was going to bring Scooby-Doo back into the limelight after such a long time remaining on CN or Boomerang respectively. And was just so devoid of the passion that even MI had, it felt like more of a cash grab than anything else. And it bums me out because there are so many good things that we could have gotten from an animated theatrical release.

But instead we got an hour and forty-five minutes of nothing and that isn’t what Scooby deserves at all. I can only hope that someone will want to try again and this time, they’ll actually care.

(Feel free to share your own thoughts on the movie and maybe discuss point I made that you agree/disagree with.)

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #306

i’m v talkative today so pardon my jabbering below.

What is the strangest type of candy you have eaten? I think I've had one of those lollipops with a bug in it before as a kid? I don't remember. What would be your most ideal profession? A freelance photographer. But I'm honestly starting to lose hope. Have you tried those coloring books for adults? Yeah; it's funny you mention 'em, 'cuz a family friend got me one for my birthday earlier this month. What is a topic you definitely don't want to talk about with anyone? I don't like talking about my sexual history, doesn't matter who you are. It's just uncomfortable. What was your first gaming console? An Atari. Is there something you're eagerly waiting for? What is it? *SLAMS FISTS ON TABLE* MAY NEEDS TO FUCKIN' HURRY. My tattoo appointment is set then. :''') Do you/have you ever belonged to an organization? If so, which one? I was a Girl Scout when I was young. What is something you're very passionate about? Nature conservation, gay rights (equal rights in general, really), the pro-choice movement, and then there are less "important" things like certain hobbies interests and such. I'm sure there are more big ones that are just slipping my mind right now, considering I feel passionately for a shitload of stuff. What are you studying or what was the last thing you studied? I majored in Art & Design with a focus on Photography in college. But guess who dropped out. What was the last present you gave someone? I don't know... I mention enough that I don't have a source of income where I can really buy anything. I think the last thing I did was a Christmas gift for Mom a year or two back of a drawing I did of our late dog Cali, whom she absolutely adored. Do you enjoy plays? If so, what was the latest one you saw? Not really, no. What was the last thing you achieved? PHP has helped me focus on little victories, so prepare for an underwhelming answer haha, but it's something. I Facebook messaged an old friend I really wanted to catch up with, and everyone in group cheered for me. :') It was really heartwarming. What a shocker that this program is really helping me once again. What is something you would like to achieve at some point in your life? I would love love love to take at least one "famous" or award-winning photograph. It'd be such amazing validation that I'm talented at something I love so much. What is one philosophy you have regarding life/living/purpose? That's... difficult to answer seeing as I'm trying desperately to find my purpose. I do try to live by this old quote a therapist said once: "Deal with life, or life deals with you." I think it holds an incredible amount of depth and meaning in such a short phrase. How would you design the inside of your own home? I don't know the details of it, really, besides that shit is gonna look like a Halloween house year-round. I can imagine wanting black furniture, too, and having loooots of decor expressive of what I love and find comfort in. Gotta make a house feel like a home just for me. What is a band you remember liking from your childhood? Backstreet Boys, duh. Do you ever get mad at people for not having the same opinion as you (i.e. abortion being wrong/right, meat-eating being wrong/right)? Two things: it depends on the topic, and "get mad" is the wrong term for what I feel. It's more disgust; ex., I'm repulsed by anti-gay rights people and want absolutely nothing to do with 'em, but I'm not like, mad at them. Do you edit any of your pictures? In what ways? Oh yeah, and it definitely depends on the raw photograph. I edit depending on the mood it emanates; like if you've seen my roadkill photography versus nature shots, there is an extremely distinct difference in editing style and vibe. I'd say in general though, I tend to like to brighten my photographs and add more vibrance. If you like to take pictures, what is your motivation? God, I could write an essay on this. I just love and am so thankful for the fact we can literally freeze time forever with the click of a button and look back on fantastic sights, beautiful moments, memories... It's just magical to me, and I adore contributing to that art. Would you ever consider living anywhere cold? Well yeah, that's my preference, actually. What is your absolute favorite food? The spicy shrimp fritas from Olive Garden, jfc. Would you ever wear snake-skin pants, or other animal clothing? Fuck to the absolute hell no. What foreign country would you like to go to for a shopping spree? Idk, considering I'm not well-versed in the artistic creations of other countries. Perhaps India? Japan? I dunno. If you met your favorite musician, what would you ask him/her? I'm asking for his fucking autograph and a hug while I smile my face in two AND cry lmao. What do you spend most of your day thinking about? I ain't gonna bullshit nobody, my PTSD. In some way or another, he's lurking in that head of mine through memories, flashbacks, wonders of what could have gone differently... but thank God it's no longer in the forefront of my mind after my first PHP. I've come very, very far, but especially when trying to blank out my mind to fall asleep, parts of PTSD strangle my brain until I'm just finally out. I really hope that changes someday. Where is a busy place you would like to go to? Yikes, nowhere, really. I like to avoid busy locations. Do you think video games cause people to become violent? Absolutely not. You are responsible for the decisions you make; music, games, movies, etc. have no deciding voice in stupid shit you do, and it's bullshit that people blame art and entertainment for such things. Vocabulary: What was the last word you learned? I'm unsure. Have you or could you build your own site? Absolutely not from scratch. The closest I've gotten to that is my photography website, but it was through the assistance of Wix. What's the best thing you can cook yourself? Scrambled eggs, haha. I do make some bomb eggs at least. Are there a lot of graffiti around your neighborhood? No. Do you have a hobby that forces you out of the house? If so, what is it? Nature photography. Would you stop eating meat, if you had to raise and slaughter it yourself? Absolutely. God, I want to go vegetarian again... Besides English, what other languages can you speak? I can speak a very little bit of German. Took four semesters of it in high school and became very good at it, but lack of practice has pretty much ruined that. Besides English, what other languages can you read? I can read German well; as in, I can pronounce most words I see, but that doesn't mean I understand what is written. Do you think you could make it as a chef? Gordon Ramsey would deadass kick me off his show on day one, lmao. What's your favorite kind of tea? It marvels me JUST how many tea and coffee questions are in surveys. Anyway, I don't like tea. I am an embarrassment to NC culture. What thing/person/happening has made you the happiest you've been? lask;dfjal;wekrjwe What's the most freeing thing you've ever done? Stealing my happiness back from someone who had no right to hold it all in its entirety. That shit's mine. Do you think today's kids are really impatient? Most, probably, but in some ways I can understand it - at least, in the sense that with the assistance of modern technology and advancements in satiating our wants so quickly, kids just expect it. I definitely believe that patience is something to try to be deeply instilled in everyone, though. I don't have an ounce of it (in most situations) and wish I did. Have you ever tasted birch sap? No. How about the young buds/shoots of spruce trees? No. Which edible flowers have you tasted? One of my favorite Southern experiences is finding a bunch of honeysuckles and tasting the honey (is it technically even honey??). Tastes amazing. My family's hairdresser lives down a beautiful path that sprouts a massive amount of them, and as kids, my sisters and her two boys would go tasting them while our parents talked for so long, or if we were waiting our turn. Good memories. What has been your worst restaurant experience? I'm not sure, really. What's the most immature, adolescent thing that still makes you laugh? "Inappropriate humor type jokes." <<<< They can get me sometimes, too. Have you ever had a life-threatening condition? If so, what was it? No, thankfully. Have you ever had a custom print done on a shirt? If so, what was it? I don't believe so, no. Besides making a tye-dye one in HS with our school colors. Wasn't my idea and never wore it, haha. Do you ever read other people's survey answers? It depends on the person. If it's a friend, absolutely, because I love learning usually obscure things about them I wouldn't have known otherwise. If it's a user I don't know from wherever I got the survey, sometimes, depending on how short the answer is and my eyes kinda just scroll over it. Do you like daytime or night time better? Why? Daytime, especially mornings. I'm generally happier when there's light around. What's your highest level of education so far? Some college. Describe your ordinary day: My average day is embarrassingly uneventful. It's sitting on the laptop doing shit on various sites, none of which are actually important, and playing WoW, which is also without true substance, save for social interactions with my friends on there. I spray Venus' terrarium everyday multiple times as well to keep the humidity up, and obviously eat and handle that kinda bodily needs stuff. Would you ever have a UV tattoo? Ugh, that'd be so dope. I've seen some awesome ones, but idk if I'd get one, considering when am I actually going to be under UV light?? Like I wanna be able to see my tat. What is the brand and color name of your favorite lipstick? I have one black lipstick, but it comes right off so I don't even like it. I only ever put it on to take pictures. What do you like on your tortilla? Just ham and cheese. How about inside your pita bread? I've never had pita bread, actually. What do you like in your burger? It depends on where I'm getting the burger. My basic is cheese, ketchup, mustard, a bit of mayo, pickles, and a light sprinkle of diced onion, but sometimes I add bacon and take away the onions. How about on your pizza? I have three I tend to pick from: pepperoni, jalapeno, or meat lovers. Do you work better alone or in a group? Alone, definitely. Which body part would you not mind losing? I'ma be extremely honest, with just how horribly weak my legs are, I could live without them, I guess. Not saying I want to by any means, it's just exhausting using them. Ideally, I'd take away something minor, like a finger or something. What common saying people use is absolute BS to you? “'Everything happens for a reason.'” <<<< Fuckin' colossal "same." I won't rag on people who believe it, especially if it gives you courage to keep moving forward, but I don't believe it in the slightest. If it were so, I'd like to talk to whoever is in control of those "reasons," please. What is the most interesting thing you’ve read or seen this week? I had no idea elephants were pregnant for two years, like holy shit, can you imagine. It was in an article I saw on Facebook about a mother and daughter elephant who are both expecting and doing well. Wonderful to hear. What’s the most useless talent you have? Ha, I'm a master in the arts of catastrophizing and jumping to conclusions involving people hating me in one way or another. What’s something everyone looks stupid doing? I'm one of those people who hate dabbing done by anybody, like you look like you're just smelling your armpit. Which kids’ movie scarred you for life? I wouldn't say "scarred me for life" by any means, but when I was little, I was terrified of the Wicked Witch from The Wizard of Oz and even had nightmares about her. It sucked because my little sister was obsessed with that movie, haha. In one sentence, how would you sum up the Internet? A source of incredible knowledge but also hate and misinformation. What would be the most ridiculous thing for the government to make illegal? I literally dread the idea of Roe vs. Wade being reversed. Banning abortion would kill so many people with operational uteruses and cause absolute pandemonium. How many friends do you have on social media and how many of them do you know for real? On Facebook, I have 124 friends, and I'd say I know most of them "in real life." However, having been on the Internet since I was so young and befriending loads of incredible people, a good chunk are "online friends." Hell, I'm more interested in their lives than most "real" ones. Long-distance friendships are so valid. What fact amazes you every time you think of it? Lots of things, generally regarding the stupidity of humanity. What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done? Probably going to the beach w/ my old friend Colleen. We had zero plans of doing it, but she just called me one morning and asked if I wanted to go, and off we went. It was a fun day. What has taken up too much of your life? I'ma be real, WoW. I don't think I'm addicted to it like I once was seeing as I go through spans where I barely want to play it at all and don't, so I truly am capable of not playing it, but rather it's just the most entertaining way to kill time in my life. I just don't like how much time I've invested into a game over six or seven years regardless. Where do you not mind waiting? Uh, nowhere lmao. Is there an app you hate to use, but still use every day? No; why would I use it if that was the case? Who is the funniest person you know? My friend Girt is fucking hysterical. What three words describe you best? Complex, passionate, and creative. What makes you think you’re smart? Lol who says I think I'm smart? Who inspires you? Korean Jesus. Okay on a serious note, not just him, of course, but he's #1 in an entire universe of ways. Do you aspire to be like somebody else? If so, who? No; I want to be my own authentic self. How did you meet your best friend? YouTube, back when it had more social aspects. Which one of your accomplishments are you the most proud of? I want to say my recovery, but like... I wonder a lot if it's "enough" to be proud of with how scarred I still am? I still struggle with a lot and feel like I could be so much better by now if I tried harder. If I'm completely honest with myself, I think it's finishing high school in the top percentile of my graduating class. There was a ceremony for the handful of us and all, and I cherish my plaque probably too much. Reminds me of a time when I knew what the fuck I was doing. What's the strangest thing you ever did as a child? Thinking I had "animal powers" where I could invoke the traits of certain animals at will, like what the actual fuck, Brittany. What did your mother teach you? Christ, a lot. Dad didn't do a lot of the raising, honestly, so much of my core values and whatnot were instilled by my mother. She taught me to care for and be nice to others, respect myself, try my best in everything, and most importantly that she is always there for me and my sisters no matter what and can tell her absolutely anything. She was very serious about us going to college and saving sex for marriage when we were younger, but she diverged from those ideas as absolutely necessary with experience. I'm extremely lucky with who I call my mom, overall. What did your father teach you? Eek... Read above. Not a lot as a kid (save for riding a bike and playing softball); most he's taught me has come following reuniting with him after my parents' divorce. I remember we went to lunch once and talked about my breakup, and he talked to me about sometimes, you just have to let people go in order to be happy, like with him and Mom. He's very serious now about ensuring us girls know that he is always there for us and will help us in any way he's capable. What makes you feel powerful? "Powerful" isn't something I really feel, if I'm being real. What are you ready to let go? It would be inexplicably fantastic if I could let every speck of Jason go in both my head and heart. What is your most bizarre deal-breaker? I don't really find any of my expectations and limits as "bizarre?" They're all valid to me. Well wait, idk if you'd find it strange that I absofuckinglutely would not date someone who hunts, but it's not to me. That's a difference in a very serious value to me. Would you rather be hated or forgotten? Hated. God, I don't want to leave this earth having given just nothing. I can live with some people hating me for whatever reason. What’s the biggest personal change you’ve made? Accepting my bisexuality, probably. That's something that I consider pretty big for two reasons: 1.) I could end up with a woman forever, and especially 2.) I was originally homophobic. I still have difficulty in fathoming how I ever was. What are some of your short-term goals? PHP is finally starting to make me build these again. I want to get better at selfcare, draw, write, and read more, I want to drink a lot more water, exercise way more... Lots of things, really. What is the weirdest thing about you? Uh. I dunno. Probably that I RP meerkats, which is a very obscure RP niche for sure.

[starry-sparky]

Hunchback and dark themes

Ok ok, I need to get something off my chest, I watched Sean(jacksepticeye)’s “Unpopular Opinions” video recently and he said he didn’t like Moana and wishes Disney would go back to taking risks like they did with Hunchback of Notre Dame. Him not liking Moana is fine, I could not care less, what bothers me is him saying he wants Disney to take risks and talk about darker themes. Anyway, that’s what I’m gonna talk about, yeehaw.

Gonna start this by saying I’m not attacking Sean, he just happened to say something I had wanted to talk about for a long time but I didn't have a way of bringing it up. Sean just happened to say something that fit well as a vector for me to talk about what I’ve wanted to for a very long time now. This isn’t aimed specifically at Sean, it's aimed at ANYONE who thinks darker themes are necessary for everything. Ok, let’s get into it now.

First off, Hunchback is a good movie, I wouldn't say it's the best Disney movie, or even my favorite, but it’s good for what it is. Second, people have different favorite genres, some people prefer drama over comedy and vise versa but that doesn't necessarily mean they're right about a film or show in that category. Ok, now let's talk about Hunchback. Hunchback is a good movie but people have put it up on a high pedestal and regard it as one of Disney's best movies because of the fact that its darker than other Disney films. If it weren't for the fact that Hunchback has a darker tone, no one would be regarding it as one of Disney's best movies. In fact, a few years ago I saw Hunchback for the first time. For years I heard of how supposedly great it was and I was very excited to see this masterpiece of a movie I had been led to believe it was. And, even though it is beautifully animated(which is another reason people hold it in such high regard) I remember being pretty underwhelmed. I thought it was good but I didn't really have any interest in seeing it again(sidenote: I haven't seen it since). And yet, I’ve continued to hear people singing its praises even though it honestly wasn't all that special. People act like it’s a surprise doesn't make movies like Hunchback anymore but it isn't when you really think about it. As good as people like to think it is, Disney doesn't do movies with dark themes for two reasons. One, Hunchback didn't do well at the box office so it’s no wonder Disney wouldn't want to do another movie in the same vein as Hunchback. Two, Disney movies are family friendly, they can appeal to both children and adults but are made to mainly appeal to kids. Although, I think we can all agree Disney cares more about the money so.

Ok now I'm addressing something else Sean brought up about the dark themes he wishes Disney would address, racism. First off, I guess he forgot Zootopia existed, which is about racism through and through, even down to the fact that stereotypes exist in the world. Zootopia has lines that are very clever and 100% intentional, like when Judy says “You're not like them[predators].” and Nick responds with “Oh there’s a them now?” which are great lines. Hunchback does bring this up with Esmeralda being Romani(they say g****, but that's a slur so no). The difference here is, the main theme and message of Zootopia is centered on racism so the writers can dig into it, but Hunchback doesn't do too much with it outside of Frollo and Esmeralda(and even that’s mainly because he wants her romantically/sexually(and hates her for him being attracted to her)).So we talked about dark themes in Hunchback but those dark themes, and dark themes in general, apply to anything anywhere. Hunchback at least was made with those dark themes in mind and went with it because that's the kind of story it is. What I’m tired of though, is people thinking a movie or show is amazing, deep, complex, and deserves every Oscar known to man for having dark themes. People don't care if the dark themes are well handled or not anymore, what they care about is if they have dark themes or not. If an animated movie or show(or even a movie or show that's not animated) comes along that wants to be fun, people will dig through every part of it to find something that can be construed as a dark theme. If they find it then they’ll make theories and insist the next movie or episode be darker to fit their need to feel good about liking something that was made with kids in mind. If it doesn't seem to have a dark theme, people will hate it automatically, regard it as “kiddy trash”, and treat the show like it was made for 4 to 5 year olds, when in reality it was most likely made for 10 year olds. It’s fine to have drama shows, serialized shows, or even shows that have more serious moments. What is not okay, is making a comedy show and then completely changing direction to make it “darker”(by that I mean edgier coughcoughstarvsandtangledtscoughcough). There's a reason why people remember The Little Mermaid, Aladdin, Tangled, and even Frozen more than Hunchback, because they were fun movies. As much as people claim to want media that has darker themes, it’s never actually the case because it's boring. It’s why Spiderverse won best animated movie in 2018, because it was fun and, though it had serious moments, they were well handled.Stop claiming to want dark themes from Disney and/or from cartoons because you think it would be cool. They aren't usually known for darker themes but you want them to be. If you want drama, go watch a drama and stop forcing drama upon cartoons that weren't made to be dramas in the first place. Going back to Hunchback quickly, I am not saying Hunchback starts off as a comedy and becomes a dark drama, it knows what it is and that's why it’s good, not great, not the best movie Disney has ever or will ever make. Hunchback is more of a drama, which is fine, but stop forcing Disney to make more stuff like it, because if you wanted that, it would be more well remembered and would have done better at the box office.(once again going to stress this is NOT an attack at Sean himself because people may think it is, thanks for your time, bye)

[dontgotothenetherworld]

lydia x superhero reader

i convinced my parents that into the spiderverse is an xmas movie and watching it has given me inspo hell yeah. i’m not gonna do a spiderreader bc i kinda just want to come with a my own hero (although every possible type of superhero has been done before, so this is by no means an original superhero).

1318 words

cw: femreader. (brief) mention of sexual harassment. gun mention.

you were living the dream, or at least what you thought was the dream. you had a gorgeous girlfriend, you were getting good grades, and oh yeah, you were stopping crime with your magic which powers.

look, you didn’t mean to be a vigilante. but when you’re neighbor’s house is getting burgled, and you can do something about it... or when the class incel is making clearly unwanted advances on your friend... or when someone decides to pull a gun on the cashier at the local convenience store... or when, you get the point.basically, situation forced you into it, and you have to big of a heart to say no.

you got your super cool magical powers after you started dating lydia, so it’s not like you intentionally entered the relationship, knowing that you could easily hurt her or bend her to your will. oh that makes you sound like an evil and disgusting person, but you would never do that kind of stuff!

your powers! your grandmother gave you a necklace on your 16th birthday, telling you it had been in the family for generations. you put it on that night, to see how it’d look on you, and all of a sudden, you could bend people to your will. like, not a lot. you could do like a subtle shift in a person’s motivation. like, if someone wanted to punch you, you’d simply shift their motivation so that they’d want to punch right next to you. or if someone wanted the last donut, but you realllyyy wanted that donut, you could just shift their motivation so that, oh wow, they really wanted a blueberry bagel. hmm... a blueberry bagel sounded good, actually. yo know what? they wanted the last donut and you could get the bagel. but wait, there were multiple bagels and only one donut, and you were pretty hungry. they wanted a bagel again, leaving the donut for you, and they even handed you a bagel! how kind!

you didn’t use your powers for important things, though. and, unless it came to the last donut, you never used your powers on your girlfriend.

but one day, she started to get suspicious.

“y/n? where were you last night, again?” lydia asked.

last night? when a peaceful protest turned violent, the violence started by the police of course, and then suddenly turned peaceful again? “i was studying.”

“oh? you had a test today?” she asked.

“no... today’s a saturday. i do have a test on monday though, and boy am i stressed for that!” you lied through a smile. you didn’t have a test monday, your teachers weren’t monsters.

“oh? what subject?” she continued to question you.

“uh, chem!”

lydia furrowed her eyebrows. wrong answer. “that’s weird, you have a chem test on monday and tuesday? i thought your teacher was nice.”

“they are! it’s a, uh, two day test! yeah, there’s a lot to cover from this unit.” you started sweating. were the lights bright in here?

“the unit you started last week?” uh oh, she was on to you. i mean, she obviously was on to you, why else would you be having this conversation, but y’know...

you nervously laughed. would it be so bad to just... shift her away from this conversation? it didn’t mean you wouldn’t ever talk about it, you were planning on telling her... eventually, but you just didn’t want to now.

you touched the center of the necklace, and shifted her away from her suspicions, you forgot you’d need somewhere to shift it to, so she ended up talking about,

“personally, i don’t think birds in america are real. birds in other countries? 100% real. but american birds? fake, spies for the government. and the government sell the information to corporations!”

i guess that lydia’s suspicions of you and her suspicions of birds were close together in her mind.

“yeah! remember last week when we were talking about the new star wars movies, and there was a bunch of pigeons on the telephone pole above us? suddenly i’m getting a suspicious amount of star wars and star wars merchandise advertised to me on instagram.”

“me too! i don’t even like star wars all that much!”

this conversation was much easier to have. and this conversation led to another, and another, until eventually it was late enough that you wanted to go to sleep, but also to late that you didn’t feel like you could safely drive yourself home.

you shot your family groupchat a text, saying you were sleeping over at lydia’s, and you snuggled in closer to her. lydia being little spoon, as always.

the following thursday, you had just finished watching an episode of the good place, when lydia sent you a text, asking you what you had been doing that morning. you had actually been shifting a kid’s motivation to beat up their drug dealer, apparently they had been dealing some bad weed. definitely a reason to beat someone up on school grounds, with like twenty kids ready to post it all on snapchat. teenage boys truly do not think.

but you told lydia that you were in the library before school. you were friends with the librarian, so that could’ve legitimately happened.

however, lydia sent a screenshot of someone’s snap story. they had been expecting the fight to happen, but when it didn’t they posted it on their story, saying how underwhelming that had been. and in the screenshot, you could see yourself, touching your necklace.

shit.

“why are you lying to me?” lydia texted you.

“oh, i went to the library after that.” you texted back. your magical powers didn’t work unless you were physically close to the person.

“sure.” she replied. and she didn’t text you back for the rest of the night. but to be fair, neither did you.

the next week, after multiple other ‘shiftings’ as you had come to calling them, you decided you were ready to tell lydia.

you asked her out on a date, a dinner at the local italian place. if she took this the wrong way, pasta would make it better.

about halfway into your meal, you said, “lydia, i’ve been lying to you about where i’ve been and what i’ve been doing.”

she looked at you, confused, “what?”

“you know last monday, when the bank robber just suddenly dropped all that money and walked out, and i told you i was at home sleeping? i wasn’t. i was there.”

“why would you lie to me about that?” lydia asked.

“because...” you took a deep breath, “ because i didn’t know how you’d react to my powers. before you say anything, let me explain! this necklace,” you lifted up your necklace. “let’s me, um, i call it shift, shift people’s intentions, or their motivations.” you said, suddenly realizing how silly your jargon sounded. “i changed the bank robber’s motivations so he didn’t want to steal anymore. i’ve done that with a lot of people, to get them to stop doing violent or illegal things.”

“have you ever... shifted me?”

you sighed. so far she was taking it well, but here came the regrettable part, “twice. the first time was when you were about to take the last donut,” lydia started giggling, “the second time was when you started asking me about where i was, and i wasn’t ready to tell you about my powers yet.”

lydia reached out and grabbed your hand. “i get why’d you’d be scared, but i’m fine. i think it’s pretty cool, what you’re doing, and, yeah, i’d rather you not do it to me,but for donuts? and for when you weren’t comfortable talking about something? it’s fine, just don’t do it all the time.”

you breathed a sigh of relief.

now you could tell lydia all the thing’s you’ve shifted people to! oh it’s time for some fun conversation!

@meangirlsx @meangirlmurphy

[culebratia]

Honest opinions on horror villains

Okay so I love horror villains and horror in general. Most of them are really interesting and have a sort of grotesque charm to them that I can’t really describe, it draws you to them and pulls you into wanting more. But there are some horror villains that are either overrated and underrated, and today I’m here to discuss some of them! (I’d like to reiterate that I don’t hate any of these characters, I actually like them all! But I’m just talking in a general perspective and my view on their popularity and the actual movie they come from.)

LESLIE VERNON

* overrated.

* okay, I know, people are going to get upset at me over this. This was an amazing movie, they said. It’s so new and different from the others, they said. And I completely understand that! It’s unique and inventive and I love the whole premise of the movie, but goddamn did it bore me..

* I like Leslie Vernon as a character, but I don’t love him like I do with other characters. He’s cool! I adore his slasher design, but his personality bores me a little bit at times. There are some points where my emotions and feelings on the guy are a little bit like a rollercoaster — up and down, up and down, up and down. It’s crazy.

* once again, I like the concept of his movie, but the way it was presented in a filmmaking point of view is underwhelming.

ART THE CLOWN

* underrated.

* there are three movies I know of with Art in them: The 9th Circle, All Hallow’s Eve and Terrifer. And all of them are equally shit, which is to be expected since it was written and directed by a young guy who specialises in special effects. But damn was Art interesting to watch.

* there are some points in the movies where I think “why couldn’t he have starred in a better made film?” because if that were so, he’d get so much more publicity! Art is an absolutely terrifying demon clown creature, way more scary than Pennywise, and people from around the world should know his name! He’s the only character in all the movies who actually has good actors.

* shitty movie, fantastic character. I hope to see more of him.

MICHAEL MYERS

* overrated by a milestone.

* look, I’m all for Michael Myers. He’s hot, lemme tell you that. But he’s a really boring character. It’s all the same (apart from the 3rd movie)! Michael returns to his hometown to find and kill Laurie, killing a whole other group of people who she happens to be involved with at some time during the movie.

* when I watch a horror movie, I want to have the villain to have some sort of character. At least with Jason, you can see some emotion in him which defines him as a whole! But with Michael? He’s a clean slate, and that is soo uninteresting.

* first two movies were great, others were unneeded honestly.

BILLY LENZ

* underrateeeeed.

* stinky attic boy needs some love. He is what started the slasher genre for peats sake and yet everyone overlooks him as a horror villain. Let me tell you, that phone scene in the beginning was absolutely fucking terrifying when I first watched it, and it’s still unsettling to this day even after I’ve watched it a million fucking times.

* we never even got to see Billy’s face properly throughout the whole movie and yet he made such an impact on everyone who ever watched Black Christmas! And that ending scene? Perfect cliffhanger. (The remake was shit compared to the original)

* great movie, great character, needs more credit.

BRAHMS HEELSHIRE

* overrated.

* bet y’all are shocked at this aren’t you? He’s the character I most often write for. But that’s really because he’s heavily requested. I actually don’t really like him all that much, too much exposure I guess. I mean I have nothing against his character as a whole, he’s attractive to me and interesting but I don’t actually know.

* now the movie is something I do know about though: bullshit. Absolutely terrible. A basic plot line (which isn’t necessarily a bad thing sometimes, it just needs to be played out right) and a director which results to cheap jump scares because apparently that’s ‘scary’. The movie as a whole is so predictable and it never scared me once when I went to watch it at the cinema. I can understand why people like it though.

* decent(?) character, bad movie.

OTIS DRIFTWOOD + family

* underrated.

* okay this might have something to do with my weakness for Bill Moseley, scarily cute women and clowns, but man do I love the Firefly family. Each and every character, even the ones we barely see, within the family is so perfectly polished and unique, and I love Rob Zombie for it. He can’t write dialogue for shit but man do I love his horror villains.

* although the first movie was very confusing at some points. Like, what?? What was with that ending? It was a very good movie in my opinion and was actually pretty horrifying. It used things that disgust us and manipulated that to terrify every single one of its viewers and that’s perfect. Hated the protagonists though.

* fantastic movie, great villains, shitty protagonists,

FREDDY KRUEGER

* overrated.

* now don’t get me wrong, I love Freddy, I grew up loving Freddy. He’s witty and fun to watch, maybe not like Chucky, but after a while he gets so repetitive that it gets really really annoying. Couldn’t they think of something unique and interesting for him to say instead of him just calling everyone a bitch??

* the writing becomes boring after a while, the directors add so many unnecessary features, weaknesses and powers we had no clue even existed up until this very point, and it’s overall not a very good franchise when you get into it. I enjoyed the first and seventh movie a lot, but all of the other ones didn’t really excite me all that much.

* okay character, okay movie, but isn’t worth all the attention.

NUBBINS SAWYER, DRAYTON SAWYER, CHOP-TOP SAWYER + GRANDPA SAWYER

* un👏🏽der👏🏽ra👏🏽ted

* these boys deserve just the same amount of attention that Leatherface does. I know that Bubba is a really cool character, and he deserves attention too! But that doesn’t mean that his family get to be left out. Each and every single one of them helped shape the Texas Chainsaw franchise to what it is today, and honestly it wouldn’t have been as amazing without them in it.

* Texas Chainsaw has so many metaphors within it nobody really goes into. When we first meet Nubbins and he’s kicked out of the van, Franklin very obviously points out “would you be able to do that?” referring to Nubbins slicing his hand up, and later on we see Franklin blowing raspberries at his friends due to the fact that he couldn’t go upstairs because of his disability, which is exactly what Nubbins was doing when he couldn’t get into the van. This area is the director exploring the ways that people could so easily turn into madness without people realising it.

* Drayton Sawyer is your average looking fellow who runs the Sawyer household, but he is not average at all. He’s sadistic, witty, hypocritical, and surprisingly still a Christian. He claims that he “doesn’t like to do the killing” and yet he’s shown constantly poking and prodding at the final girls like they’re some caged animals, living only for the pleasure of himself. The fact that he’s an elderly man basically screams “wolf in sheeps clothing”, because usually when you see an elderly person, you assume them to be kind and wise, whereas, Drayton can’t even spell ‘sex’ correctly.

* Chop-Top wasn’t present in the first movie sadly, but it’s explained why, which is understandable in a filmmaking perspective. He is probably the most terrifying character out of the bunch. He’s impulsive, disgusting, and absolutely fucking insane. Whether or not this is due to his time in Vietnam I don’t know, but man does it make a great affect. And that time in the movie where he was introduced? It was absolutely heavenly. No one in today’s horror industry would build up suspense like that and cause so much raw fear from a petty jump scare. The fact that he carries around his damn brothers corpse like he’s puppet, treating him like he’s still a living being adds onto the scare factor as well.

* great villains, good movies, everything after TCSM2 wasn’t really very good though.

Okay, now that’s over and done with! Let me show you my top ten favourite horror villains (from actual horror movies), you’ll either be completely shocked or completely not! :)

Pinhead — love the creature design. Fantastic personality and concept. Annoyed he’s not a woman.

Bubba Sawyer — baby boy needs love. And affection. And kisses. And basically anything positive. We must protect him.

Chop-Top Sawyer — terrified me when I first saw him as a kid. I wanna fuck Bill Moseley. I love his personality. Wish his movie came out.

Captain Spaulding — funny ass motherfucker. Always cracks me up. I want him to be my daddy.

Hannibal Lecter — interesting in a psychological perspective. Has a way to make your skin crawl without doing much.

Art the Clown — scarier than Pennywise. I wish his movies were better. Why didn’t Terrifier make it obvious he was a demon?

Otis Driftwood — boy’s a hottie. But please stop fucking corpses. Once again, Bill Moseley.

Stu Macher — first fictional crush. He’s my irl type of guy. I dated a guy like him once.

Jennifer Check — movie was ahead of its time. Legit was about having a succubus gf. Lesbian scene was hot. I’m gay for Meagan Fox.

Billy Lenz — terrifying phone calls. Nasty boi. The remakes will never be as great as the OG Black Christmas.

Anyways, so that’s it! It’s past midnight currently so I might just go to bed lol but whatever. I’ve wanted to write this out for a whiiile but decided to just get it over with now. I’ll say it all again: every character I write for, I like, I just have different levels of like, so please no hate over this. Thanks!

[thatgazebobullshit]

IT CHAPTER TWO REVIEW

This is v long and heavy on the spoilers, so read at your own risk

.DISCLAIMERS

1. I saw this in the Spanish dubbed version because of reasons. I will be rewatching the original version but, because I still haven’t, there may be some things that I’ve missed because of the translation. I also didn’t hear the changes in the kids voices which made the “they haven’t aged” thing they tried to pull a tiny bit more believable.

2. I have read the book. However, I read it about 8 years ago and I while I’ve reread some parts, I’ve never read the whole thing since. Because of this, there were a lot of scenes that I felt weird about, as I couldn’t tell if they had just made this really random thing up or I just couldn’t remember it.

3. These are just my opinions, please don’t take them personally. I love all the characters with my whole heart and I do think the actors did them justice.

THAT BEING SAID

Let’s start with what I liked

1. The cast

They all did a fantastic job. Every single one of them. Even the new little kids killed it. (The scene with Pennywise and the girl in the bleachers was one of the best moments/jumpscares in the whole film for me). Obviously Bill Hader was a standout, also I’d only seen him in SNL so I didn’t know what to expect, and he definitely impressed me. But we can’t forget about James Ransone. I couldn’t get enough of him. He captured Jack’s Eddie so so so so well he deserves every bit of praise he gets.

2. The flashbacks

I don’t know who the fuck said there were too many flashbacks, but they’re wrong. I get wanting the focus to be on the adults but the flashbacks gave us a bit more insight on the losers dynamic outside of the whole “this clown is trying to kill us so we need to stick together”, and I liked that they showed more encounters with It, because there is no way he only tried to get to them once all summer. Eddie’s scene with his mom was really good too, I liked it a lot more than his scene in the first movie with the leper. Also they were cute as fuck. Don’t get me started on the hammock scene.

3. Adrian and Dom

I loved this scene. It was a great beginning and it gave me hope for the film. Really well done, very similar to the book and heavy on the reddie references, which you know I love. Also very sad, but I knew what was going to happen so it didn’t affect me as much.

4. Richie’s arcade scene

This scene hits hard. Finn Wolfhard’s acting is 10/10. He just wanted to play with the cute boy Bowers leave him alone.

5. Mike calling Eddie

I’m a bit bitter that they didn’t make him a choffer but I’ll admit that making him a risk analyst makes sense. His conversation with Myra was on point. It said so much in very little time. How unhappy they are, the mommy thing, just great. Also the car accident and him being like “I’m fine”. Wonderful.

6. Benverly/Reddie scenes

The parallels. Amazing. Beverly drowning in blood while Ben drowned in dirt, very effective. Meanwhile Reddie just being husbands. 10/10. The pomeranian bit might have been my favourite in the entire movie, not gonna lie.

OKAY NOW TO THE THINGS I DID NOT LIKE

1. Mike

Yes, Isaiah did really good. But Mike character was just so... bad. Just really annoying. The scene where he drugs Bill just didn’t sit right with me. It just wasn’t Mike and I was really frustrated with his character any time he did or said something, I’m sorry

2. Bill

Again, really great job on McAvoy’s part, but, again, I found the character very annoying and unnecessarily reckless/stupid at times. The scene with the sewer and the kid was just uncomfortable to watch and a bit cringey. Also the whole blaming himself and going after It alone got old very soon.

3. Most of the “scary” scenes

There were a few good jumpscares here and there, but in general the actual scary parts of the movie fell kind of flat. Young Richie’s encounter with It would have been really cool if not for the horrible, horrible cgi on Finn’s face. The scene with the naked grandma looked promising in the trailer but it ended up being pretty meh. Also the photographs and her talking about Pennywise like it was her father and them showing him as a person dressing up as the clown... very misleading and completely unnecessary.

4. The final battle  

So many things wrong with this part. Where do I begin. For starters, why would they include the super weird ritual that I can’t remember if it was in the book or not, if it was just gonna be for nothing. Literally the whole getting the objects was such a big part of the movie and all they do is put them in the fire and scream for a while and then it’s like “well guess that didn’t work” and then they are in the same exact place they were as children. The objects did NOTHING WHY WOULD YOU MAKE IT SUCH A BIG DEAL I DONT UNDERSTAND. And do you expect me to believe that while all of them had their weird adventure (Bill with young Bill and the Benverly/Reddie scene) Mike was just there????? Hiding behind the rock???? The whole time????? Eddie’s scene was nice and I wouldn’t have mind the changes if HE HADN’T DIED FOR NOTHING. Like are you telling me that ALL THIS TIME all you had to do was BULLY THE CLOWN TO DEATH. WHAT THE FUCK. That was soooo underwhelming. Very unsatisfactory. Seeing a bunch of adults just shouting CLOWN, YOU’RE JUST A CLOWN to this thing that’s supposedly this great evil was just, so bad I cringed the whole way through. As you can see I’m still bitter about it.

So yeah, that is all I have to say. Had its moments. Enjoyable, scary at times but also kinda disappointing.

Oh and the whole “horror version of brokeback mountain” is a load of bullshit. There is so little Reddie please don’t go in there expecting this big gay romance because you only get glimpses of it and they never delve into Eddie’s side of it. So yeah, glad R+E happened, but it does, unfortunately, seem kind of one-sided the way they went into it.