#.* i said i cast fireball ( ooc ) `

[murderbled]

To anyone waiting on anything from me, whether it be here or on Annie or Lyre, thank you for being so patient.

I have been sort stuck in an anxiety rut of “oh, I can’t answer anything new because I have old stuff waiting on me” and then I just… end up not writing anything.

I’m sorry I haven’t been as active with actual writing as I’m sure we would all like me to be.

I will do my best to be better about it, but I also hate writing just for the sake of answering. It’s disheartening to get a half assed reply. I wanna put the whole ass heart into it, because my partners deserve that energy and enthusiasm.

TLDR: I am slow, overwhelmed and will try to be better. I love you all.

[astarion-approves]

Astarion resting in the evening with a reader with chronic pain/disability pain??

Literally your writing makes me so giddy ❤️✨✨ kudos to you OP for being fantastic as descriptions and dialogue!!!!

Astarion x GN! Tav with chronic pain

Safe for work, chronic pain, gender natural reader, 3rd person, 900+ words, SPOILERS ACT ONE, short and sweet, slightly OOC Astarion, no beta, (I DON'T have chronic pain so my apologies if this is way off the mark, I hope you enjoy it.)

Read below or on AO3

--------------------

Another fireball hits your shoulder, nearly knocking you to the ground from the force of it. The other party members glance in your direction, just making sure you haven’t fallen from the attack. The Hag’s wicked laugh rings in your ears as she continues her fight, gusts of wind and more flames flying towards you. 

Your body aches, the meat of your muscles shaking, each movement like a million blades being stabbed into your skin. It takes all of your effort to keep standing, each attack from Auntie Ethel bringing you closer to your knees. 

Shadowheart defends against her, casting a quick healing spell in your direction – just enough to keep you on your feet. 

For now. 

As Gale and Shadowheart chase after the Hag you will your body to move, to follow along with them and take her down. Your breath is unsteady, pain shooting up your limbs and to every joint in your body. 

“No,” you mumble, stumbling forward but managing to keep yourself standing. “Not now. Please, not now!” A flare up, the never ending pain that curses you each and every day. Something that even the tadpole can’t remove from you. Fire licks up your spin, the pain spreading and moving to control you. You fall to your knees, reaching out towards Gale and Shadowheart as they land blow after blow onto the powerful Hag. 

And you can do nothing but watch. 

You clench your jaw to keep yourself from screaming out in agony, to keep yourself from cursing the God’s that gave you this cruel fate. For what kind of God would ever deliver upon you the work of a Devil? You’ve made no sinful deals, no murder of the innocent, earned no curse from the evil that wanders in this world. 

No–

You are simply doomed with pain that you can never evade. Pain that will chase you and consume you for the rest of your days. 

“Tav,” Astarion is next to you, his hand on your back, sweeping up and down your spine with as much gentleness as he can muster. “Are you alright?” 

You shake your head, the battle carrying on just in front of you. Shadowheart cries out as she’s hit in the stomach, Gale jumping to help her off the ground just as another ball of fire is cast in their direction. 

“Astarion–” you gasp as the pain takes over, finally pulling you into the ground. 

Astarion shushes you, his hand leaving your back and instead carefully lifting you from the ground and into his arms. He rushes from the battlefield, placing you down behind a thick tree truck, a soft smile across his lips. “Now, you just stay right here. I will be right back after we’ve taken down this nasty little Hag. Rest.” 

And then he’s gone, the twang of his bow being shot over and over lulling you into a deep sleep. 

—-----------------------

You wake with a groan, blinking your eyes as you stare up into a deep red fabric that hangs above you. Slowly, you sit up, hissing at your body stings all over. You look around you, books thrown about and a large assortment of pillows all over the ground. 

Astarion’s tent. Then that means– 

“Ah, no, stay right where you are,” Astarion said as he waltzed into the tent, carrying a bundle of fabric in his arms. “Lie back down, darling; before I make you.” 

“The battle–”

“Is over, and we all survived. Goodie.” 

“Mayrina-”

“Alive and well. Now, hush,” Astarion said and gently pushed on your shoulder, forcing you to lie back down. He sat down beside you, opening the fabric he held before and revealing a large pile of ice. Astarion hummed as he laid a blanket over you and then began placing piece after piece of ice on top of you. 

“Ice?” you asked. 

“Hm, yes. What is the point of having a Wizard in our camp if he can’t conjure some ice for us?” 

“Why are you doing this?” 

Astarion raised a single brow at you, as if the answer were obvious. “You’re in pain, are you not?” 

“Well, yes–” 

“And while that Hag was a powerful creature, I know a fireball like that wouldn’t be enough to put you on your ass. Not normally, that is.”

“But–” 

“But, nothing.” Astarion sighed and poured the rest of the ice over your legs. “Honestly, Tav. Why didn’t you tell me you were in pain sooner? I could tell that morning, you know. The way you hardly spoke as we made our way into the swamp, how you grunted just going up the steps of that gross little house, and you sighed when we walked through the mud.” 

You looked away from him, ashamed. This pain, it was a weakness, one that you didn’t want the others to see… And now they all know. The fear of them leaving you behind was festering in the back of your mind. 

“I care for you,” Astarion began, grabbing your attention and forcing you to stare at him with wide eyes. “Probably… more than I should… since you’re keeping secrets from me.” He sighed and reached over, flicking you in the forehead. “So, the next time you’re in pain, just tell me. Please? I’ll carry you on my back if I have to.” 

You snorted. “I can’t ask you to do that.” 

“Nonsense,” he replied and waved you off. “Besides, it would just be another excuse to have you close.” 

“... So, you care about me?” 

Astarion laughed. “Of course I do, but don’t make me confess to you while you’re here lying in agony.” 

You pouted. “Astarion–” 

“Another time,” he whispered and leaned down, giving you a little kiss on your forehead. “I promise.” 

“Fine.” 

“Now that that’s settled,” Astarion held his hands up, wiggling his fingers. “Which foot should I begin my massage on?” 

[sonneillonv]

I deserve a fucking medal for tonight.

Player has been constantly on their phone during game, ignores the map and then doesn't know what's happening when it's their turn, doesn't understand their spells or abilities, never uses their staff of healing to actually heal their party, and to top it all off, fireballed the fighter for shits and giggles (and also smashed several useful potions in the process). They then got back on their phone, told their partner what they'd done, and announced to the whole table their partner thought it was hilarious, so like... this was not an "Oops" situation.

The characters are trainees/squires for a knightly order, so the fighter sent a complaint to their training officer. Today I, the DM, got to pull that PC aside for a chat as the training officer.

IC: "So I'm concerned about these behaviors, and your teammates have expressed concern. I'd like to go over the code of conduct and make sure that you understand the expectations, and that you can ask me any questions you have, because if your teammates can't trust you it's hard for them to go into life or death situations with you."

Player proceeds to argue that they shouldn't have been able to cast that fireball into that space so it was really not their fault that I let it happen (bro, you said "I fireball the room").

Player tells me I'm always taking them too literally (like when they say "I fireball the room"? and then they roll damage dice? And then the fighter takes damage? Were we not supposed to take the 8d6 literally?).

Player tells me they never know what's supposed to be IC vs OOC and they're just playing around and joking (then you say, "nah, I don't really fireball the fighter I was just kidding". You don't roll damage dice.)

Player feels they're being targeted by me because see, this one time, they cast Speak with Dead and I (trope as old as time) got them to waste a question (because that never happens when PCs encounter oracles or get three wishes or come into possession of a monkey's paw and it definitely didn't LITERALLY HAPPEN IN THE D&D MOVIE WHEN THE GROUP CAST SPEAK WITH DEAD). Player has brought this up THREE TIMES since it happened. Everyone has explained the trope to them. They continue to use this as a reason why they are being grossly mistreated and misunderstood and I'm clearly just trying to entrap them into doing things that piss the party off.

(It's important to note that no one is pissed off about the wasted question. They're pissed off about other things which this player is doing voluntarily. Like fireballing a room with party members in it and shattering a potion of necrotic resistance in a dungeon full of wraiths.)

Player blamed me for giving them bad advice on how to play their cleric. (One of the PCs has a follower who is a giant rat. The giant rat doesn't do anything except run around rubbing Keogham's Ointment on fallen PCs with its little rat hands. The rat is a better healer than this player's full-classed cleric with a staff of healing. This is a skill issue.)

Y'all, I am still in a state of disbelief. But I kept my temper, I focused on constructive solutions and what could be done to improve things going forward, and we managed to get past it, despite how much I really wanted to give this player a piece of my mind.

Like... jesus christ. You fireball a teammate and get a very, VERY mild talk from your gentle and understanding training officer who does not yell at you or raise his voice, and this is your response???

[lagotu]

4: Former friend, and invitation

(OOC T/N: This is a google-translated-with-some-minor-editing of an isekai harem webnovel called 異世界召喚は二度目です/Summoned to Another World for a Second Time. I did this mostly because the anime had a very iddy scene, and a little because I found another person doing the same thing but making much worse translation decisions. My interest in this project wanes as my favorite characters are cast aside and it becomes more apparent that the only relationships explored are ones that involve Setsu, so Chapter 4 is as far as it will go. This will be the only translator's note, so enjoy!)

A/N: I'm posting two pieces today, please take a look at them first.

The day after, I skipped training and went to Yuuhi and the top students' training ground.

I peeked at them from behind a wall. Their training was on a completely different level than the one I was at.

There was flying magi, slashes that cut the wind, fists that broke the sound barrier.

The four people training were attacking in different ways. The final person is-

"Here, here! Make the intervals between your attacks shorter! You are part of a four person party, if you don't coordinate, you won't even be able to land a single blow on me!"

It was a handsome blonde man wearing the castle guard's armor. He's so handsome that ten out of ten people would recognize him, and he's a good match for Kouma.

"Wow, you've gotten better at handling yourself after five years, Grain."

The one training the four heroes is my former companion, Grain Harmony.

He's a skilled swordsman known as "Swordsman Grain". Five years ago, he looked like a naive boy, but now he's a fine young man. According to Elka, he even has a fan club that calls him Mr. Handsome.

Grain was able to easily handle the four heroes' attacks, but I was still honestly impressed by their powers.

Jiro, wild and a real good looker, coats his fists with magic to do close combat martial arts.

Mizuki, who has twin tails, wields a dagger and uses her speed to fight close up.

Class hero Kouma has a shining golden sword, and attacks with both fire magic and slashes from a medium range.

If you have a holy sword, you're definitely a hero.

The holy sword is a skill that anyone with the hero class can use, and the strength depends on the hero.

Kouma's sword is the Excalibur type, the most common type in the hero industry. Wielding it enables all sorts of skills: exorcism, light slash, body boost, and magic boost. It really is a hero's sword.

... I also have the hero class, so theoretically, I could also use that holy sword.

I mean, if you could call that piece of junk a holy sword, but...

As I looked into the distance, I heard a roar coming from Grain's training ground.

A huge fireball the size of a two-story house appeared.

The caster was my childhood friend Yuuhi. She seems like a powerful magician. The fact that she wasn't even winded after shooting that much magic proves her ability. She must have grown quite a bit.

However, it's still no match against Grain.

He cut through the flames without a single scorch mark.

The four of them were smiling bitterly, as if they expected this.

"That attack now wasn't bad. You're doing well. I'll leave it at that for today and get some rest," Grain said with a smile.

When the four of them heard that, they looked as if they were collapsing. It looked like he was fighting with a lot of concentration, and though there didn't seem to be physical injuries, his face looked strained.

"Wow, Grain-sensei, you're really strong..."

"That dagger won't even pierce me..."

Of course, it's not something you heroes can do anything about, even though you've only had your powers for about a week.

... Well, this is above standards for a week, but what's more, Grain is above standards.

"Yuu, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine! What about Kouma?"

"It's fine as long as Yuu is fine."

The two of them were talking to each other and drinking water brought by the castle maid.

Kouma's gaze was fixed on Yuuhi drinking water. I see, she's popular.

Oh, but you have to prioritize your own business over someone else's romance.

I wanted for Grain to walk a bit further and be more distanced from the four, and dashed at him with all my might.

"What? Guoh!?"

I snatched up Grain in an instant and carried him to a shady building.

"Huh? Where's Grain-sensei?"

"Did he go to the bathroom?"

"You're a weak child!! Where did you get this kind of power! What is this?"

When I dropped him off at the back of the warehouse, Grain immediately pulled out his sword.

Hmm, interesting.

I'll beckon you with my hand.

"Grrr!"

When I let go some murderer intent, Grain, covered in a cold sweat, brandished his sword and charged at me.

By applying a little murderous intent, you can create a situation where if you don't kill, you'll be killed. If you can ride it, you can bring it into battle without thinking like Grain does now.

This is a technique I devised to force a situation of self-defense.

Dodging his sword, I calmly observe.

He's raised his arms considerably. If I let my guard down, I'd probably be hit.

Well, that won't happen.

I timed it, and blocked Grain's sword with my bare hands, strengthened with magical power.

"What!?"

Ignoring his shock, I swung my legs around.

"It's about time I reminded you of fear..." I had an evil smile on my face as I kicked Grain in the crotch as hard as I could.

"Ah!"

A handsome guy holding his balls and collapsing. Looking good.

"This... this technique... oh, <Male Killer>... aghh..."

"Oh! Do you remember my kick?"

"No way... Setsu... nnngh..."

THUMP

"Ohh!? Don't faint!"

I shake Grain, who has fainted from the pain. My kick was that effective...

...

"What about the balls?"

"I'm safe."

"That's too bad, you pretended to be trying."

"No, thanks to you, I was able to accept you as Setsu-san right away."

Grain woke up a few minutes after he passed out. We were leaning against the wall of a building, talking.

"I never expected you to appear by summoning a hero..."

"I was surprised too. I was looking for a way to return back there, but I couldn't find it on my own. It was just a coincidence that I was summoned this time."

"In that case, let's be thankful for this coincidence. We were also researching ways to summon Setsu again at the castle..."

"Oh, I heard it from Elka."

"Oh! You've already met Elka."

It seems like these guys were trying pretty hard to bring me back. That feeling honestly made me happy.

“Have you met Tia yet?”

"No, not yet."

"In that case, please go see her today. She's still researching how to summon you."

"I see...Then I definitely need to let her know that I'm back."

"Yes, she'll be happy, I'm sure!"

Well, if you say that much, I'll go show my face today. I was actually thinking of doing it tomorrow.

"Then it's time to go- Ah, that's right. I'll probably be leaving here soon."

"Is that so," Grain says.

"? You're not surprised."

"Well, given you're Setsu, that's pretty predictable."

Why am I so easy to understand?

"I see...well, that's why I'm going to cross the continent and meet those guys."

"Oh! Everyone will be happy about that! And you're saying it will stop the war, right?"

"Is it that obvious...?"

It's easy to understand, so that's what Grain told me.

"Well, okay. I'll go then. It's nice to meet you, Grain."

"Welcome... it's good to see you back. I'm really happy, Setsu-san."

"Oh, see you then. On the mean time, please keep an eye on Sunset for me."

"? You mean Yuuhi?"

"Yeah. She's my childhood friend on the other side. She seems to be taking advantage of her position, but please keep an eye on her. If something happens to her, you'll be sentenced for the crime of murder again, right?"

"Huh!...I'll keep it in mind."

I remind myself again and say goodbye to Grainne.

It's nice to meet old friends again. Feelings and personalities that have been suppressed until now can be released.

I decided to return to the castle to meet my final companion, Tia.

...

I, Grain Armony, was excited to be reunited with Setsu for the first time in five years. After he disappeared, there was a hole in my heart from his departure.

The hole was filled and I returned to my dorm in a good mood for the first time in a while.

On the way, the three heroes I was entrusted with training. Jiro, Mizuki, and Kouma, ran up to me from the other side.

“Where did you go, teacher?”

“I looked for you!”

That's what Jiro and Mizuki say.

I remember that I suddenly disappeared and apologize properly.

"I'm sorry, but a friend suddenly came to visit and I was dealing with him."

There was something strange about thinking of Setsu and I as being friends, but when I think about it, I think that's the kind of relationship we always had.

"Old friends? What's the use of that?"

"We want to train a little more, could you please join us for a little while?"

Kouma's eyes were serious when he said that.

I took the afternoon off today because it was the final battle where I covered the basics, but judging by the way it was, I guess it wasn't enough.

"I don't mind. What about you, Yuuhi?"

After I agreed, I noticed that Yuuhi, who Setsu had told me to keep an eye on earlier, wasn't there.

“Ah, Yuu went to the castle because he had something to do, right?”

Judging from what Jiro said, it seemed like he had properly declined before heading over, so I was relieved.

"I see... then, let's continue with the training."

I visited the training ground again to fulfill their request.

―My groin still hurts a little.

...

"Hey Necro-yuki, where'd you go today?"

As I was going back to the castle, I was captured by some troublesome idiots. Seriously...

As I desperately hold back my sigh, Endo wraps his arms around my shoulders, as friendly as ever.

"Don't you think you're being lazy today? Are you going to be strict with yourself so that you won't misbehave again?"

Endo's grinning...and so is his entourage.

As I was desperately holding back my sigh-

“Wait a minute, Endo!!”

There was a voice that made us still.

When I turned my head towards the direction of the voice, I saw Yuuhi. She walks towards us, muttering that she has finally met her.

"H-Hanabashira!? Oh, what do you need from me?"

Endo is flustered by Yuuhi's beauty, but Yuuhi's face droops and she responds in a disgusted voice.

"Ah, nothing. I have something to do with Yuki. So, could you lend me Yuki for a little bit?"

"Ah...yeah."

At Yuhi's words, Endo just left... it was really pathetic.

"Thank you! Now, Yuki, can I talk to you for a moment?"

"Ah……"

Yuuhi, who snatched me away from Endo and the others, takes my hand. I looked behind myself and saw that Endo and his friends' eyes were stained with hatred. It's amazing that humans can have expressions like that.

After getting far enough away from them, Yuhi let go of my hand and suddenly jumped into my chest.

"Yay! It's been a long time since I've seen Yuki!"

“Oh, hey.”

I am hugged tightly by Yuhi. Her large breasts hit my chest, changing their shape. Wow, this is amazing.

...

As expected, I sensed a problem and tried to pull him away, but...

"Just a little bit away..."

"Haa~ It's been a long time since I've seen Yuki-kun~"

She just relaxed and put all his weight on him! Hmm, my chest is so big! !

"I was worried, weren't you? Yuki-kun said you didn't have any magic power...I was wondering what's going on."

"Well... I'm managing somehow."

"...It seems so, I'm glad you're doing well..."

"...It seems like you were really worried about me. I'm a little sorry."

"That's right, Yuki-kun! Next time you take the day off, would you like to go to town with me?"

“Town?”

Speaking of town, I'm talking about Destinia's castle town. It's quite spacious and has enough interesting things to keep you from getting bored.

It seems that Yuhi came to visit me today in order to make this invitation.

"How about it?"

"Ah, if that's all, sure. You came all the way to invite me on your day off."

"Really!? Absolutely! Yay!"

Sunset leaves me and says hurray. I don't feel the slightest bit of regret that the warmth is gone, I do. Or do I??

After that, we made small talk and talked about our lives.

From what I've heard, it seems like Yuuhi and the others' training is pretty hard. Grain's training is efficient, but it's pretty tough...

After that, we made plans to meet up. I had something to do later.

"I'm glad you came to see me today! Yuki-kun, I was able to replenish Yuki-kun's energy!"

What's Yuki-kun energy?

“If you have any trouble, please definitely ask for help!! Don’t break your promise to go out!”

"Okay, okay, okay, okay."

See you then! I saw Yuuhi off as she ran away.

...Well, I can't leave this continent until I can at least see the city with Yuuhi...

Am I in trouble?

"..."

At this moment I realized that...

Endo, hidden in the shadows, was glaring at me.

[jeeperso]

D&D Quotes Without Context

Ravenloft edition, Fundertainment Land arc part 1

GM: Alright, last time on the Yawning portal runners. OOC: Wrong channel. OOC2: Wrong thread. OOC: Wrong channel thread. And our heroes took a well earned vacation to the most luxurious vacation spot in all of Ravenloft: The beautiful Sapphire Islands. Where there was sun, surf, a wedding, fabulous door prizes, and surfing against werewolves. Jonni: “I got this book of tips on being hotter.” Gorbash: “In a physical attraction sort of way or a things in my proximity burst into flame kind of way?” Jonni: “Yes!” “Okay, so, Marsh, I’d ask what I can set on fire, but I’m guessing everything. So we need a safe word for when you want me to light everything up. Normally, I’d suggest ‘funderful’, but given the locale, I’m guessing that would be triggering. So…’Bigbooty’ when you want me to go nuts.” “I find the best defense is a good fireball.” "Welcome to Gunder and Danzi's Fundertainment Land,” the woman says in a chipper tone. "We welcome you to our funtastic home, and we kindly ask you to acknowledge and abide by all the rules here. So that we can maximize our fundertastical experience. “ "No running, no outside food or drinks, no loitering, no littering, no intimate moments, no questioning the rampant consumerism no escape. No escape. No escape. No hope. No escape. No escape NO ESCAPE.” Gorbash: “This is why I picked mercenary work instead of retail.” Jonni: “Wait, BACK THE FUCK UP. What was that about no intimate moments? I demand to speak with and murder your manager!” "Sorry, just on hour 42 of a 72 hour shift. You get used to it.... Or you get a knife and start stabbing people.” "As said, we're the Union. I am here to ascend the Murderhorn, awake the Yettirrasque, and lead us all to freedom from the burning ruin I will leave.” “I get to make the ruin!” Yog-sothoth: "So Poom's character sheet now says 'Wizard' on it, and—" Azathoth: "I think we missed something.” Nyarlathotep: "Awww. But I liked breaking the game with.....uh, ahem, paying attention now….." Nyx: "Bad, Nyar, bad. No breaking the fourth wall: it was just fixed after the last time." Edmund: ”OH COME ON!” Vesh: ”You know, as a cleric of Ioun, you probably should have seen this coming." Jonni: “I suggest violence.” Poom: "I think I'm on Jooni with this one: light everything on fire, and light the stuff that doesn't burn on harder fire.” Jonni: “So, we’re 3 for on that. One more and I can start burning.” “Okay, honey, you relax. We’ll meet back up after I help Marsh topple the banality of evil and smite its ruin upon the mountain.” Gorbash: “Ah, yes. Money talks around here. If only until they part you from it.” Jonni: “Jokes on them: Vesh makes her own. Sometimes they’re baby mimics.” “If they try, give them this.” Jonni hands her a card. It reads “You put my wife in a flask, you’re next. Jonni.” "Let's get to the action of taking this place down already. The longer I have to smell all this over-sugared food the sooner I'm going to snap.” “Am I becoming a responsible adult?” “Maybe, but I doubt it.” "Until closing time, topside cast members try not to get caught.” OOC: Kruez, save some 20s for the rest of us. “I think he’s sweet on you, Eddie.” You suddenly see a stream of black blood start coming out of his mouth. “That doesn’t disprove my theory.” Jonni: “Man, why is it always ‘nightmare circus’. When do we get to go to the magic porno circus?” Azathoth: "Insert 'big top' joke here.” OOC: Gets you right in the nostalgias. “Bigbooty?” Edmund takes up a defensive posture. "I have... Funderful Dollars.” "Come with me I have something to show you.” “Is it a world of pure imagination?” "Only 20% imagination, We have to conserve.” "You want access to the Murderhorn, I will grant it, if you can fight six golden tickets hidden throughout the park.” Gorbash: “Sorry was that ‘fight’; not ‘find’?" “Please. We’ll obviously succeed because we are pure of heart. Mine’s full of lust. You all get your own vices.” “They got an adults only zone?” “I doubt it. Even if they did, the best you'd get is overpriced booze in novelty glasses.” "All kid friendly and no porn, Jonni.” “This is the worst place we’ve been.” "Flaws not withstanding, everyone here has pure and noble hearts that would face down the world if their friends needed them. I'll wager on our side anyway.” “What have we told you about gambling?” "The lab we go to last, please leave the lab for last, I just know we have a big fight waiting there.” “So we go there first while we’re fresh.” "Rats, I knew my logic would ruin it for me.” "Gorbash, don't do that. You are creepy when making those kawai eyes.” “Sure. Let do this and get out of this hellhole.” "That may be an insult to hellholes.” GM: Anyone who gets over a 15 notice something odd about the food vendors. OOC: Odder than being carny food vendors? "None of this will do your cholesterol any good... Not to mention I think its nutritional quality is equivalent of a piece of cardboard.” "Bet you cardboard is healthier.” "That's a big Big Burger.” "Oh god, it is the size of a cart wheel.” "The Double Triple Bossy Deluxe on a raft, 4x4 animal style, extra shingles with a shimmy and a squeeze, light axle grease; make it cry, burn it, and let it swim. Doesn't quite roll off the tongue.” ”MARSHAL, AS I LIVE AND BREATH.” Jonni: “I sincerely doubt you do either.” "I'm with the union. Together we can shut this park down and you return to the Indigo Moon of Yarrl.” "This guy here was my top student, the one I entrusted all my recipes too.” “He killed a man with one of those. Or at least put him in a diabetic coma.” Gorbash: “What's the game, Big Steve?” Big Steve: "Eating contest. One of you against me.” Gorbash grins. "Don't threaten me with a good time.” "Hey we got vegan dishes. Try our new cheese injected fried pickle. Or our goat liver filled with okra. Which is also fried.” "Neither of those are remotely vegan!” "Sure they are. Cheese is a vegetable right?" Marshal: ”Remember to eat the trough, too.” Gorbash: “Is it deep fried?” Big Steve: "And slathered with Hollandaise.” Jonni polymorphs Gorbash into a whale. “Marsh. Get a shovel.” Gorbash: “I feel like this was unnecessary.” Yog-sothoth: "As opposed to what else we've done?” "Ioun... Give pity to this good soul. Protect him from gastritis and heartburn…" Gorbash: “This is delicious Steve.” Big Steve: ”The secret ingredient is lard.” Nyarlathotep: "Not sure how secret that is.” GM: Next up: Baked Bean pizza. “The devil’s pizza!” "Told ya we had vegan stuff here. I mean if you eat around the pork.” "I traveled all across Yaarl, learning from the finest chefs I could find. Then I burned all my notes and made this in stead.” GM: Next up is... Meat Gelatin. “That was quite the quick escalation from unhealthy to war crimes.” "I think at least 3/4th of this park can be called war crimes, Jonni.” GML Next up is... LUTEFISK. Nyx: "No, not that abomination! I can't believe humans came up with that dish and demons didn't inspire them.” Yog-sothoth: "It was Deep Ones.” "No, how could you? That dish is banned on so many planes of existence.” "You think that’d stop me? I ate the last health inspector came round here.” "... I think i'm going to have to stick to salads for the next week…” "I used to eat people, and I agree." "Try our new Lasanga salad, with eight types of meat.” Gorbash: “Nothing teaches you to appreciate food quite like starvation.” "Await the sign, then all employees shall be released.” Inside is utter bedlam, you see dozens of screaming kids running around, jumping all over. OOC: player is getting Chuck-E-Cheese flashbacks…. You're pretty sure you see the kids pull down a waiter and skeletonize them. "Oh no...my irony sense is going off. It’s in the ball pit, always the ball pit.” "I hope not. I really hope not. do you know how unsanitary those are in NORMAL places?” “Those things are 60% urine by volume.” "As the one of us actually immune to disease, I volunteer as tribute.” “You'll rust from the ammonia.” Poom: "Wish whatever's in there'd eat a few of the kids. Turn the volume down.” "My guess, the balls are acid proof and that pit has acid underneath it hiding an acid swimming shark in it. Nasty things.” "Or it's a plastic-ball-ooze.” "No, no, no, no. Not again, not again. That happened at my 12th birthday party.” "I was distracted by the tiny slime.” “Why am I covered in goos!?!” "Sounds like a fowl condition.” “I say we cure the badger of his rabies and make him our standard adoptee for the domain.” “I mean wouldn't be the strangest thing we picked up. Also he should be a union rep.” Jonni makes a badger papoose and straps him in. “You shall be Vesh and I’s only son. You shall see the world through my eyes as I see the world through yours.” Gorbash: “Starting a family right after the honeymoon eh?” “Bitey. Avert your eyes. Mommy has to light some assholes on fire.”

[applepies-and-starlight]

☕️ ask: magic, sorcery, things of that nature

Love hate relationship.

Like, don't get me wrong I love magic and all that shit it's great, but when I'm the one who has to do the worldbuilding on those systems? Pain and suffering.

Example: my Nymphs of Tempest AU has a heavy emphasis on magic (especially the magical prowess of individual Nymphs), and it is All Over The Place.

On one hand there's the part of the system that's an amalgamation of Persona, Dragon City, and Dragon Mania Legends, where basically there's a "basic magic" system that everyone knows at least a bit

...Yeah notice how I said basic? Because there's also This Other Set of magic abilities that some Nymphs have that I made before the magic "system" and None of them fit into the system to begin with, this includes Hind's weird mirror shit, Ranger's Duat-Locker-Adjacent ticking bomb of an ability, and Molly's pearl-nets/puppet strings

AND THEN THERE'S THESE ASSHOLES! (Gesturing to Roy and Whalex)

BOTH OF THEM ARE JUST "oh yeah my magic is whatever the fuck I feel like" BITCH PLEASE I HAD TO REVISE THE ENTIRE FUCKING MAGIC SYSTEM BECAUSE OF BOTH OF YOU AAAAAA—

(Tl;dr magic good, but i absolutely Despise making the systems for it)

Semi-unrelated but there was this one time in an rp where one of the main rp coordinators said magic was, quote "the presence of the unexplainable" (this was in-rp not ooc)

Which. Yeah, ok, makes sense. But like they then go ahead and say "once we know what magic is it stops being magic"

Bitch? No?? Just because I know the exact logic and physics of cast Fireball doesn't mean it's any less magic?????

[swordofsuns]

Silly dnd quotes + context for Some of them

(a few of these are from in character game nights or out of character)

"is your goat an alcoholic?"

(ooc) "do apples exist?"

"I killed a man" "only one?"

(ooc) "we aren't getting into his daddy issues yet"

(ooc) "I'm not making memes cannon."

(ooc) ''gods not looking. quick! Get married" (my phone died)

''dont kill god this early on''

"you look very stabbable"

"it may not technically be cannibalism but it's still fucked up"

"im not going to juggle you without your consent"

"I juggled a baby once"

"someone throw a sword at me" (also related to juggling)

(ooc) "what's 18 plus 7" "Enough"

"that rat's got a history"

"we've already done the best team building activity: getting a goat drunk!"

"Jess did you fuck my mom?" (No Jess didn't)

(ooc) "IS THE HAND FUCKING JESS???" (no)

"spicey yahtzee"

"I'll stop jumping out of windows when you start taking the stairs" (slightly less silly, one pc can turn into smoke and keeps flying out of windows, it's best friend keeps following it even though she Can't turn it to smoke)

''im sorry I cant read horny cursive''

"you vibe like smarts"

(ooc) "I dont care if I shouldn't fight the bbeg this early on, im casting fireball" (the bbeg is breaking out of a magical prison one of my players fireballed it at level five)

"don't remind Jess of bone rights"

"i could never forget bone rights"

"you've lost bone rights" (said pc who can turn into smoke goes boneless when dispell magic gets cast at it, it's best friend knows that spell, hence bone rights)

"i just got that fucker back don't kill it Again" (the fucker who can turn into smoke {the hand} can't be killed For Good {by most things, there's an exception} but is a fragment of a god in a mask, it can Only take over someone 100 years after it dies it had just got knocked to zero HP then previously mentioned best friend {jess} said this)

"what's up with Jess" "*tired sigh* there's a lot 'up' with that woman "

[watchtheworld-burn]

WILL BYERS

Obsessive and possessive! Will byers x Male! reader

Stranger things

Genre: thriller

Pronouns: He/him

Status: Series

Warning: kidnapping, disgusting monster, the characters might be a little OOC, cursing, Spoilers.

Authors note: So I saw a fanfic like this and I wanted to try it, I also changed the title since I realized that it I'll make will a yandere because of his screen time so I'll just make him close to a yandere.

EPISODE 1: VANISHING OF WILL BYERS

"Something is coming. Something hungry for blood. A shadow grows on the wall swallowing you, in the darkness. It is almost here." Mike narrated. "What is it?" Will asked with his cute voice. What? Is there something wrong with calling your boyfriend cute? Pause.

Yes, boyfriend. I know that you're both too young to date, but Will was the one who couldn't wait a few years to date. You both knew that you had feelings at the age of 10, sheesh, almost a teen and you guys already confessed.

After the confession you guys decided to be friends since 10 years old was too young but at the age of 11, Will convinced you to date but kept it a secret to everyone. So you agreed. Anyways back to the story.

"What if it's the Demogorgon?" Dustin said, getting nervous. "Oh, Jesus, we're so screwed if it's the Demogorgon." You replied to Dustin and Dustin agreed with you. "It's not the Demogorgon." Lucas reasoned.

"An army of troglodytes charge into the chamber!" Mike exclaimed and brought out the figure. "Troglodytes?" Dustin said while smiling. You and Will sighed in relief. "Told ya." Lucas responded and chuckled, and all of you chuckled. Then Mike looked down looking a bit upset. "Wait a minute." Mike said softly. "Did you hear that? That... that sound? Boom... boom.." Mike said, raising the suspense in the room.

"Boom!" Mike yelled and slammed the table, making you all flinch a bit since it was so sudden. "That didn’t come from the troglodytes. No, that... That came from something else." Mike narrated. Will leaned a bit closer to Mike and you, Dustin, and Lucas looked at Mike.

"The Demogorgon!" He exclaimed and slammed the figurine to the table. All of you groaned. "We're in deep shit." Dustin complained. "Will, your action!" Mike told Will. "I don't know!" Will replied and tried to think of what to do. "Fireball him!" Lucas told Will. "Yeah, Fireball him Will!" You said, agreeing with Lucas.

"I’d have to roll a 13 or higher!" Will reasoned. "Too risky, Cast a protection spell." Dustin told Will. "Don't be a pussy. Fireball him!" Lucas said. "Cast Protection." Dustin said, begging to differ. "Fireball him Will!" You said to Will. "The Demogorgon is tired of your silly human bickering! It stomps towards you. Boom!" Mike yelled.

"Fireball him!" You and Lucas yelled. "Another stomp, boom!" Mike yelled again. "Cast protection." Dustin told Will. "He roars in anger!" Mike narrated. While Lucas and Dustin yelled to each other. Will looked at you. "Fireball!" He exclaimed and accidentally threw the dice too far. "Oh, shit!" You cursed then all of you stood up attempting to find the dice.

"Where'd it go?" Lucas asked. "Where is it?" Lucas repeated. "I don't know!" Will replied to Lucas's question. "Is it a 13?" Dustin asked. "He doesn't know Dustin!" You replied to Dustin's question while you all were finding the dice. "Mike!" Karen Wheeler called Mike. "Mom, we’re in the middle of a campaign!" Mike said. "You mean the end? Fifteen after." She said and got out of the basement and Mike climbed upstairs, following her.

A few seconds later Will found it. "Oh, I got it." after he said that he went near you. "Does the seven count?" Will asked you. "It was a seven?" You and Lucas said in unison. "Did Mike see it?" Lucas asked Will. Will shook his head. "Just lie to him, he'll never know anyway." You told him and started fixing your stuff. You three climbed upstairs.

"Yo, hey, guys." Dustin said and you three stopped and looked at Dustin. "Does anyone want this?" Dustin asked. "No." You all said in unison and got out of the basement.

"There's something wrong with your sister." Dustin said. You looked at him and raised your eyebrow. What took him so long? and what does he mean?

"What are you talking about?" Mike said. "She's got a stick up her butt." Dustin said and walked towards his bike. "Yeah. It’s because she’s been dating that douchebag, Steve Harrington." Lucas said.

"Yeah, she's turning into a real jerk." Dustin said, agreeing with Lucas. "She’s always been a real jerk." Mike said. "Nuh-uh, she used to be cool." Dustin told Mike. "Like that time she dressed up as an elf for our Elder tree campaign." Dustin said while biking away. "That's your only reason?" You told Dustin. "Four years ago!" Mike yelled.

"Just saying."

"Later."

"Bye Nikes."

While you guys were away, Will looked at Mike. "It was a seven." Will told Mike. "Huh?" Mike asked. "The roll, it was a seven." Will responded. "The Demogorgon, It got me." Will continued. He grunted. "See you tomorrow." He said and tried to catch up with you.

"Good night, ladies." Lucas said and turned right. You also did the same. "Stay safe Will!" You told Will. "You too, M/N!" Will replied and blushed a bit.

"Kiss your mom 'night for me." Dustin said as a joke. Then Dustin looked at Will. "Race you back to my place? Winner gets a comic." Dustin asked Will. "Any comic?" Will asked. "Yeah." Dustin replied. Then Will started biking faster. "Hey! Hey!" Dustin yelled. "I didn't say 'go'!" Dustin yelled again

"Get back here! I'm gonna kill you!" Dustin yelled. "I'll take your X-men 134!" Will told Dustin.

Meanwhile with you and Lucas.

"Hey M/N. Are you and Will dating?" Lucas asked you which caught you off guard. "Um, no. We're too young anyways." You lied. "Why'd you ask?" You asked Lucas.

"You guys seem too close." Lucas said. You rolled your eyes. "Uhuh." You said and started biking faster. "Hey!" Lucas yelled.

Back to Will.

Will was biking towards his house and was thinking about you, ever since you guys started dating he got really clingy of course you didn't mind. But sometimes it felt very suffocating. Then he noticed that the light in his bike had gone off which made him confused.

He looked down to check then it turned on so he looked up to see a tall black figure. It looked weird. He was shocked and accidentally lost grip of his bike and the bike went down which made him fall.

He whimpered because of the pain and stood up to hear a growl. He gasped and ran away, leaving his bike behind. When he finally reached his house, he opened the door and locked it immediately. His bark was barking and ran towards him. He touched his head for a second and ran to the rooms.

"Mom? Jonathan? Mom?" He said while checking inside the rooms to see if his brother and mother were there. To his dismay they weren't home. He ran to the window and checked to see if he was there. He saw it walking towards him while screeching. He got scared and ran. He picked up the phone and dialed a number.

"Hello? Hello?" He said but he was met with a static crackling and he heard a screech. He looked to his door which had a glass, he saw the black figure and it was growling. Then the lock was unlocked. He dropped the phone and ran to the shore.

He got out the bullets and placed it inside the gun and cocked it. While he was waiting for the creature to open the door he held the gun towards the door. His breathing was shaky. He heard a growl and a screech behind him. He turned around to see the creature. The light bulb started glowing like crazy. Then the screeching stopped.

You suddenly woke up. You looked at the clock. It's still night? Why did you wake up? You then remembered your dream. You saw a bike and a telephone hanging. You also heard a growl and screech. You took your notebook which was in one of your drawers and wrote. "Bike, telephone hanging, growl, screech. 11/6/83 12:30 am."

You placed the book back where it belonged and slept.

THE NEXT DAY

"And that’s it for News Center this morning. Thanks for joining us.

Let’s hand off now to Liz at the news desk." The woman on the TV said. "All right, thank you, Donna. Turning now to local news,

we’re getting reports of surges and power outages all across the county. Last night, hundreds of homes in East Hawkins were affected, leaving many residents in the dark. The cause of the outage is still unknown. We reached out to Roane County Water and Electric,

and a spokesperson says that they are confident power will be restored to all remaining homes within the next several hours." Newscaster on TV said.

Then Hopper woke up to a dog barking. Hopper sighs. Hopper got up and got ready to go to work.

Meanwhile in the Byers family

"Where the hell are they?" Joyce complained while finding her keys. "Jonathan?" Joyce asked her son. "Check the couch!" Jonathan replied to his mother while cooking breakfast for them. "Ugh, I did." Joyce said and she checked under the cushion and found the keys. "Oh... Got them." Joyce said. "Okay, sweetie, I will see you tonight." She said to Jonathan and picked up her bag. She went to Jonathan and touched his shoulder.

"Yeah, see you later." Jonathan said. Joyce looked around the room for a second and noticed that Will wasn't there. "Where's Will?" She asked Jonathan. "Oh, I didn't get him up yet." He said and placed the scrambled eggs on the plate. He faced him mother. "He's probably still sleeping." He said and his mother sighed. "Jonathan you have to make sure he's up!" Joyce said.

"Mom, I'm making breakfast." He complained. "I told you this a thousand times." Joyce complains. "Will! Come on, get up honey. It's time to get up." She told Will and walked to his room to see that Will wasn't in his bed. "He came home last night, right?" Joyce asked and walked to Jonathan.

"He's not in his room?" Jonathan asked her. "Did he come home or not?" Joyce repeated. "I don't know." Jonathan said. "You don't know?" Joyce said but this time she seemed a bit pissed. "No." Jonathan repeated.

"I got home late. I was working." he said while stammering. "You were working?" Joyce replied. "Eric asked if I could cover. I said yeah.

I just thought we could use the extra cash." Jonathan informed Joyce. "Jonathan, we’ve talked about this." Joyce complains. " I know, I know." Jonathan said.

"You can’t take shifts when I’m working." Joyce scolded Jonathan. "Mom, it’s not a big deal. Look, he was at the Wheelers’ all day. I’m sure he just stayed over, or maybe he stayed at M/N's house." Jonathan informed her. Joyce sighed. "I can't believe you sometimes." Joyce complained and walked to the telephone and dialed Karen Wheeler's number.

While the Wheeler's were eating breakfast they heard the phone ringing. Karen Wheeler walked to the telephone and picked it up. "Hello?" She said. "Hi, Karen. It’s Joyce." Joyce said. "Oh, Joyce, hi." Karen replied.

"What the hell, Mike?"

"Hey! "

"Quiet!"

"Language."

"Are you kidding?"

"Was that Will I heard back there?" Joyce asked Karen. "Will? No, no, no, it’s just Mike." Karen replied. "Will didn’t spend the night?" Joyce asked her. "No, he left here a little bit after 8:00." Karen informed her.

"Why? He’s not home? Karen asked. "Um, you know what? I think he's with M/N, he's been clinging to him since last year." Joyce told her. "Thank you so much. Bye." Joyce said. "Okay. Bye." Karen said. Joyce hung up.

Joyce then dialed your mother's number.

"Anak, alam mo kung saan ang glasses ko? [Son, do you where my glasses are?]" Your mother said. "Nasa higaan. [It's on the bed.]" You said. Your mother went to her room and wore it. She kissed your cheek and waved you goodbye. You also waved her goodbye.

After the door closed you heard the phone ringing. You picked it up. "Good Morning, M/N L/N speaking. How can I help?" You said. "Hello, M/N. It's me Joyce." Joyce introduced herself. "Oh, Good morning Ms. Byers. Do you need something?" You said.

"Is Will there?" Joyce asked. "No, sorry." You said. "Oh okay, thank you M/N." Joyce said. "You're welcome, Ms. Byers." You said and Joyce hung up. "Sino yun? [Who was that?]" Your friend Akisha asked you. "Mama ni Will. [Will's mother.]" You replied, even though they were in your home unexpectedly you weren't scared because you got used to it.

"Ano ang sinabi niya? {What did she say?]" Akisha asked.

"Nag tanong siya kung meron dito si Will. [She asked if Will is here.]" You said. You then gave them your candy and you two went to school together.

After you waved Akisha goodbye I saw Mike, Lucas, and Dustin. I waved at them to catch their attention. After they got off their bike Mike noticed that Will wasn't by your side. "That's weird. I don't see him." Mike said. Mike held your hand and you four walked to class together. "I’m telling you, his mom’s right. He probably just went to class early again." Lucas said. "Yeah, he’s always paranoid Gursky’s gonna give him another pop quiz." Dustin said, agreeing with Lucas.

Just as about you four were about to go inside school you saw Troy and his minion. "Step right up, ladies and gentlemen." He said and you four stopped walking to look at Troy. "Step right up and get your tickets for the freak show." Troy said. 'Well if it isn't Megatron and Hal Stewart.' You thought.

"Who do you think would make more money in a freak show?" He said to Hal wannabe and walked closer towards Lucas. "Midnight." He said and punched his shoulder. "Frogface." He said and punched Mike's shoulder. "Fag." He said and punched your shoulder. As much as you wanted to punch him you made a deal with your parents that if you weren't violent for a whole week they would give you whatever you wanted. "Or toothless." He said and punched Dustin's shoulder.

Hal wannabe started doing a thinking pose and looked at Dustin. "I'd go with toothless." He said while mimicking Dustin. "I've told you a million times, his teeth are coming in." You said to Troy's minion.

"It's called cleidocranial dysplasia." Dustin continued. "It's called cleidocranial dysplasia." he said, mimicking Dustin. He chuckled. "Do the arm thing." Megatron said and pointed at Dustin's arm. You pulled Mike and Dustin's arm. "C'mon guys." You said. "What did you say fag?" Megatron said.

You looked at his eyes for 5 seconds then a basketball hit Megatron's head. He fell to the ground considering the basketball hit him hard. Hal wannabe kneeled down and checked to see if Megatron had any injuries. Then you four ran away. When you four finally reached the classroom Mike, Lucas, and Dustin looked at you, "What was that?" They asked you and you just shrugged your shoulders.

AFTER CLASS

The bell finally rang. "Remember, finish chapter 12

and answer 12.3 on the difference between an experiment and other forms of science investigation. This will be on the test, which will cover chapters 10 through 12. It will be multiple choice with an essay section." Mr. Clarke said and trailing off in the end after he realized that everyone was ignoring him and going home.

Mr. Clarke saw you four in front of his desk. "So, did it come?" You ask. "Sorry, boys. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but... it came." Then you five walked to the AV room. "Yes!" Mike said with a smile on his face and sat down. "The Heathkit ham shack." Mr. Clarke said.

"Whoa." Mike said, amazed. "Ain’t she a beaut?" Mr. Clarke said. "I bet you can talk to New York on this thing." Dustin said and pressed something.

"Think bigger."

"California?"

"Bigger."

"Australia?" You said. he nodded and then you guys got excited. "Imagine how happy Will would be if he saw this." You said with a smile on your face. [sorry if I'm wrong about this stuff, I don't know much about this stuff.]

"Hello, this is Mike Wheeler, president of Hawkins Middle AV Club." Mike said with an Australian accent. Dustin took the headset and wore it. "What are you doing?" Lucas asked. "Hello, this is Dustin,

and this is the secretary and treasurer of Hawkins Middle AV Club." Dustin said with an Australian accent. "Do you eat kangaroos for breakfast?" Dustin continued and Mike laughs. Lucas took the headset and before he started talking the principal [?] walked in with a police officer behind him.

"Sorry to interrupt, but, uh, may I borrow Michael, Lucas and Dustin?" the principal said. then you four started talking at the same time. "Okay, okay, okay." Hopper said. "One at a time, all right? You." he said and pointed at Mike. "You said he takes what?" Hopper asked.

"Mirkwood." Mike said. "Mirkwood?" Hopper said, confused. "Yeah." Mike said. "Have you ever heard of Mirkwood?" Hopper asked the police officer beside him. "I have not. That sounds made up to me." the police officer replied. "No, it’s from Lord of the Rings." Lucas said.

"Well, The Hobbit." Dustin said. "It doesn’t matter." Lucas responded. "He asked!" Dustin replied. "He asked!" Lucas mocked Dustin. "Shut up, guys!" Mike said meanwhile you on the other hand zoned out. "Hey, hey, hey!" Hopper said, attempting to shut the two boys up.

"What’d I just say?" Hopper said. "One at a damn time. You." Hopper said and looked at you. "Mirkwood, it’s a real road. It’s just the name that’s made up. It’s where Cornwallis and Kerley meet." You said. "Yeah, all right, I think I know that one." Hopper replied.

"We can show you, if you want." Mike said. "I said that I know it!" Hopper said. "We can help look." You said. "Yeah." Dustin said, agreeing with you. "No." Hopper said.

"After school, you are all to go home. Immediately. That means no biking around looking for your friend, no investigating, no nonsense.

This isn’t some Lord of the Rings book." Hopper told you four. "The hobbit." Dustin said.

Lucas slapped Dustin's knee. "Shut up!" Lucas scolded Dustin. Dustin Slapped Lucas's shoulder and they started fighting. "Do I make myself clear?" Hopper said. "Yes sir."

AT THE L/N'S HOUSE

"Anak, kamusta ang klase mo? [Son, How is school?]" Your mom asked. "Okay lang. Pero nag-aalala ako kay Will kasi nawala daw siya. [It was okay. but I'm worried for Will because they said that he disappeared.]" You replied. "Anak, pwede wag kanalang mag punta sa bahay ni Mike? kasi baka makidnap ka. [Son, Can you stop going to Mike's house? maybe you might get kidnapped.]" Your mother said in a worried tone.

"Okay, ma." You said in disappointed tone. "Ano man dream mo ngayon? [What was your dream today?]" Your mom asked. "May nakita akong bisikleta at telepono. May narinig akong growl at screech. [I saw a bike and telephone. I also heard a growl and screech.]" You said. "Pero may narinig kang growl at screech Bago ka natulog? [but did you hear a growl and screech before you slept?" Your mom asked.

You shook your head. "Mahirap na talaga ang mga clues mo ngayon ba kasi dati hindi man ganito ka hirap malaman kung ano ang darating. [The clues in your dreams are hard these days because before it wasn't this hard to know what will happen in the future.]" Your mom said.

You stopped eating. "Ma, busog na ako. [Mom, I'm full.]" You said and went inside your room.

A few minutes later they tried to communicate with you but it seemed like you were already sleeping. So while you were sleeping they tried finding clues about Will's disappearance.

Meanwhile with the byers family, they talked about Will then Joyce got a call and she heard him breathing like he was scared.

You woke up. You checked the clock to see it was 1:00 am. You got your dream notebook and wrote, "William Byers body, girl with shaved hair, cotton. 11/22/83 1:00 pm." You placed it back where it belonged and slept.

The reason you went to sleep because you needed clues about Will's disappearance. If only he didn't disappear maybe his obsession wouldn't be worse than it already is.

[yourplayersaidwhat]

Our party was doing a 10-sessions long season finale of our long campaign. In one of the session, we met a dragonborn whose pie granted us immunity towards an element of our choice. Most of us picked fire element as our resident wizard is prone to fireball-ing the enemy while our melee players is understandably a bit afraid of getting in said fireball’s way.

Skip time to our final session where we had to infiltrate the mafia ranks, and the events turn that we're  fighting the mobs.

Wizard: I cast Wall of Fire.

DM: That could hit both Barbarian and Rogue 1. Are you sure?

Barbarian, OOC: It’s fine, we’re fire resistant.

Rogue 1, OOC: Immune.

DM: WHAT HOW? IMMUNE?

Barbarian: IMMUNE!?

Wizard: IMMUNE????

Rogue 1, laughing: You guys forgot that the pie gave us immunity? I thought it was weird but I wasn’t going to look a horse gift in the mouth!

The Wizard got their Wall of Fire roasting the mobs while the Barbarian and Rogue 1 are vibing.

[girlandthedarkness]

the avatar I azula x reader

what if azula will have a crush on a girl that turns out to be the avatar, what would she do? 

a/n: take a shot every time you see me doing a grammatical mistake, it's a little bit dramatic and in this fic azula is slightly ooc, because she's in love

Y/N were just playing in the royal garden, she came to the palace with her uncle, who had to attend a meeting. Y/N heard some noises behind her, and when she turned around, she saw a girl, who was walking towards her. The mysterious girl has a dark hair and a sly smile on her face, when she approached her, Y/N could see the royal crown in the girl's head. "Your Royal Highness." Y/N says gently bowing her head. "I saw you here, all alone, so I decided to play with you since I'm so bored." The princess voice was calm, but it still sends shivers down Y/N's spine. "Also, you can address me as Azula, what's your name?" To Y/N's opinion Azula's voice sounds genuinely interested. "Y/N". In that afternoon, Azula and Y/N spent time together, playing and chatting about stuff, the firebender even showed Y/N her moves, Azula couldn't help but try to impress the other girl. She even scolded herself for being so open with a person that she met a few hours ago, but the other girl makes it so easy to be wide open with her. Their game was interrupted by a maiden, that with a polite voice announced that the meeting was over and Y/N's uncle was waiting for her. "Will you come again?" Azula's voice was still calm, but to that was added a bit of sadness as well. "It was my uncle who was invited, so I don't know-" But her words were interrupted by Azula's "I'm the princess and I order you to be tomorrow here." She sounds like she will not take no as an answer, so Y/N just bend her upper body in a sign of respect and left with the maid who was ready to escort her. The next day Azula introduced Y/N to her other friends, Mai and Ty Lee, the last one was so happy to meet Y/N, that she runs to hug her. "So you are that mysterious Y/N that Azula talks about all morning, nice to meet you." You smile at the girl who griped you in her arms, noticing Azula's slightly red cheeks, which disappeared once she saw other's eyes on her. After that, the four became the best friends, spending a lot of time in academy and at royal palace. This is where Y/N found out that she can firebend, before that she was thinking that she's a non-bender.

Y/N was training already a few years in hand combat, but the last few months she had taken some acrobatic lessons from Ty Lee, who was very happy to teach her friend everything she knows. That's how Y/N found herself sparring with Azula on the backyard, wanting to test her abilities on a firebender who'll shot fire at her. At start Azula casts some fire at Y/N to see how good she can move, when she saw the girl moving fast and precise, she stopped holding herself back. After Y/N successfully dodged all the fire she sends at her, Azula shot more fireballs at the girl, thinking she'll dodged it like the first ones. But Y/N didn't, she avoids the first three shots, but missed to escape the third one, the blue fire almost licked the young girl's skin, but in a pure instinct, Y/N, stopped the fire right in front of her chest, shocking everyone including herself.

"So you didn't know that you're a firebender?" Mai's voice is curious; despite being hardly covered in carelessness. "Honestly I though I'm a non-bender as my parents, my uncle is the only firebender that I know in my family." Y/N talk fast, still astonished by the news. "Then you a very lucky person." The girl quickly turns around to see Azula who have a small smile on her face, but when she lifts her eyes to meet Azula's eyes she notice sadness in them. "Y/N can I talk to you privately?" But the princess didn't wait for girl to answer, she takes Y/N's forearm and drags her to garden, that she so dearly hates. "Something's wrong?"  Azula study Y/N for a long time, her eyes exams her body, stopping at her chest when she noticed the slightly burned garment. "Are you dragged me here just to stare at my chest?" Y/N founds this situation funny, but the blush still crept on her cheeks, for her the princess is more than just a friend, you can call it a crush. Azula on other side just rolls her eyes, still deep in her thoughts. "I'm sorry, I should had been more careful, I almost hurt you." She said avoiding the other girl eyes. Y/N smile, in this few years, she gets used to see Azula's emotions or regrets occasionally and only in private, that's why she greedy memorize every second. "That's okay Azula, I'm not hurt and if you want to make up for almost kill me, you can become my firebender teacher." Azula just rolls her eyes again, feeling much lighter, now that she's sure that Y/N it's not mad at her.

Later, in the night, Azula is thinking about her feelings toward the Y/N, the things that she feels when the girl is near it’s nothing that she ever felt. Her heart starts beating faster, her palms sweats, she feels a tight in her chest and a foreign sensation of pure happiness every time Y/N hugs her.

Another few months were spending for Y/N in endless training with Azula, who makes sure to cast her own feelings for Y/N aside and teach her firebending. She makes sure to introduce her to everything she knows and even started slowly to teach Y/N the lightning bending.

But Azula was still a royal member who needs to attend gatherings and parties, so when she has to meet some very important general, she takes Y/N with her, half to continue their training and half to just have Y/N beside herself. "Why are you so pale, are you sick?" The Azula's face stay the same, not even one face muscle twitches, she keeps her appearance calm, but Y/N could see the worry in her eyes. "I guess it's just sea sickness." Azula frown her eyebrows and drags the sick girl to her own chamber, on the way ordering to one of the guards to bring something for sea sickness. "That's nothing Azula, I'll get over this." "You look very pale, maybe a tea will make you feel better?" The next few days Y/N spends on bed, feeling very ill and weak, but at the same times she enjoys the sudden attention that came from Azula. Lost in worries, Azula, didn't notice how their borders disappeared, she could spend hours just talking with Y/N, but deep down in her heart she knew that this is too good to last forever. And she was right.

Y/N felt like the sea decide to revenge on them, the storm make their ship to shake violently, while the waves were hitting them. Azula was busy talking with the captain, deciding how to survive the calamity. Y/N felt useless so she decides to go and help the crew to bring in everything from outside. The hard rain on girl skin didn't bring discontent, opposite, she feels very content, it was until she was thrown out from the ship by a violent shake.

Azula was annoyed by the downpour, thinking how late she'll be, her thinking was interrupted by an open door without anyone knocking on it. She was ready to scream, when she saw the terrified look on one of the guard. "What's now?" "It's Y/N, she was outside when we saw how she fell into the sea!" He sounds scared, and Azula wonders, is he anxious about Y/N or afraid of her anger. She didn't cast a second glance at him, she tells him to show her where this happened.

During this time, Y/N, was fighting for her life, feeling how the heavy clothes drags her deeper to the bottom. She already lost all hopes when she heard a voice, then another, thousands voices in her head, telling her to rise, Y/N's hands move on their own, bending all the water from her lungs and then around her, moving her closer to the surface. The last thing that Y/N feels is a pair of hands that brings her out of water.

Azula could feel her heart pounding in her chest, she hurried up her pace, almost running, she outs all her thoughts that she's late, Y/N's alright, right? Outside the rain stopped, making easy to search something on water, she moves around the ship, ordering everyone to do the same. Azula was ready to take a boat and search somewhere further, when she saw a light coming deep from the water and then she saw a body. Quickly lifting the body out of the water she breathes with relieved when she saw Y/N's face, but then she notices the light in her eyes that slowly faded away. Azula let the body on the deck and feels like her whole world breaks again, she commands to her guards to take care of Y/N, while she left to recollect her mind.

Azula spend the last hour thinking, Y/N is the avatar, there's no doubt, the shining eyes and the water that brought her from the sea. The person that she cares about dearly is the avatar, the number one enemy of the firenation. So the rumours about the "avatar" that was seen in Southern Water Tribe is a lie, she was right beside them. She could go and throw her in jail, where she wouldn't be able to bend anything, bring the avatar back the fire nation, her father will be proud of her, her nation will worship her. Azula moves fast, open the door that secure the avatar from her and stopped when she saw the girl on bed. The realization hit her, it's real, Y/N is the avatar, she can't sacrifice her, Azula stays here, just like that, staring at the girl and try to analyze everything. "Azula?" The hoarse voice of the Y/N, makes shivers run down Azula's spine. "Did you know that?" She needs to know, did Y/N lied to her all this time. "I don't understand." Y/N sounds genuinely, that make Azula even more angry. "Did you know that you are the Avatar?" She almost spits this words, feeling how her defense starts to crack. "The Avatar? What do you mean-...so this's what it was...Azula I swear I didn't know" The tears start pouring right from the Y/N's eyes. Azula study the girl a few more moments and came closer, already knowing what she'll do. "You can't stay here, Y/N, it's dangerous. I'll leave a boat here, on the ship, take it and run away. Hide somewhere, maybe in Earth Kingdom? It's a very big place, they wouldn't find you here." The stillness returned in Azula's voice. "I can't leave, my family and, and you Azula, I can't leave you." "I'll meet you at sunset, come here to the ship, understand?" Y/N nods and Azula, take of the hand from girl's face, when she even managed to touch her? The rest of the day Azula tried to focus on the general and his plans. "I know, everyone think that Avatar returned back to world, but tha's just rumors, your highness"

To Azula annoyance, outside was pouring once again, she lets a deep breath when she saw Y/N's form approaching her. "Had you taken everything?" Azula says nodding to a small bag in the girl's hands. "I didn't take a lot of things with me." Y/N study Azula's face trying to find anything, but was meeting by a stone cold face. "Take it, you'll need money." The princess quickly throws the bag with money in Y/N's own bag. "Why do you do this Azula?" "Because..." Azula looks at Y/N as if she tried to remember everything, taking her arms she cups Y/N's face, inhaling deeply when she saw her leaning in, caressing softly her face to Azula's hands. "I care about you." Y/N nods and take Azula's face in her hands, giving her a kiss, tears were all over their face, and Y/N let a painful laugh. "I imagined our first kiss differently." Azula tilt her head and give the last kiss, feeling way to numb to even cry. "We meet again, I know this, when I'll win the war, I'll found you, I promise." Y/N just close her eyes trying to remember Azula's scent. She quickly gets on the boat, which will take her to the port where Y/N will start her life on the run. The next time they’ll meet, both of them will be on different sides of the war.

[murderbled]

Asthora’s newest goal: become Raphael’s step-mother 👀

[carewyncromwell]

[After how rough of a day she’d had, Carewyn had been looking forward to spending some time with Charlie. She always had fun talking about Quidditch and dragons with her fellow Prefect, and after dealing with Beatrice and Ben, she thought that talking about something fun with a good friend would be medicinal to her spirit.

The two gingers met at the Three Broomsticks. Carewyn fetched two Butterbeers from the bar and placed them down on the table, one in front of Charlie and the other next to her spot.]

“So I heard Quidditch tryouts are soon -- have you found someone to replace your Keeper from last year?”

[Charlie didn’t answer. His gaze had drifted away toward the fireplace in the corner.]

“Charlie?”

[Charlie looked up, startled.]

Charlie: “Huh? What?”

“(gently) I was asking you about Gryffindor’s Quidditch tryouts. You still need to replace Swanson, right?”

Charlie: “Oh...yeah, I...suppose so.”

[He didn’t seem very interested in the subject, though. His focus once again drifted away and his eyes seemed to glass over.

Concern creased Carewyn’s eyebrows.]

[Charlie looked back guiltily at Carewyn as she leaned forward over the table, resting her head in her hands.]

“You don’t need to apologize!”

[Her voice was so empathetic and concerned that there was an audible edge to it.]

“Charlie, you’re obviously feeling terrible -- you don’t need to apologize for feeling that way. You can’t control how you feel.”

Did I want to forget my awful day? Sure -- but you come first.

[She exhaled quietly through her nose, pausing for a moment. When she spoke again, both her eyes and voice had softened.]

“...It’s about Rakepick, isn’t it?”

[He’d said he’d been having trouble getting back to normal after what had happened, back in the Library...

Charlie bowed his head and gave a low sigh.]

Charlie: “...Yeah. I just...I can’t stop thinking about it. How she just...used us, like that. How she attacked us out of nowhere -- cast the Cruciatus Curse on Merula like it was nothing -- laughing and taunting us all the while.”

[His voice dripped with resentment as he raised his head, his brown eyes shining with a colder, harder fire than Carewyn had ever seen before.]

Charlie: “And instead she just threw us away -- like rubbish.”

[Carewyn felt for Charlie so much in that moment.

Even though she’d never trusted Rakepick herself -- even if she’d always hated how she couldn’t read Rakepick’s intentions and hated how willing she’d been to hurt and manipulate others to get her way...Carewyn could never have imagined the horrible lengths Rakepick would go to in that Vault. And ever since then, Carewyn had hated Rakepick all the more, not only for hurting her friends and her brother...but also for how much she heard herself in some of those pretty lies Rakepick had thrown out before turning on them.]

Lies...what place am I even in now, to hate her for lying...I’ve done nothing but lie since I got back...

[Hating this chain of thought, Carewyn shoved it down fiercely.]

I’ve only lied to protect my friends. Rakepick lies for herself and no one else.

Charlie: “I’ve tried to go back to normal, but what she did...it just...it’s made me lose faith in people. It makes me feel like I’d be better off just leaving everything behind.”

Charlie: “At least dragons don’t hide their intentions.”

[Carewyn felt like Charlie had squeezed her heart in a vice grip.]

“Charlie...”

[It took a minute for her to surmount the flare of horror and pain in her chest.

Charlie couldn’t leave -- not now -- not while R was so dangerous -- if he left the country, she could never make sure he was safe --

Her hands clenched over the collar of the “C”-marked burgundy Weasley sweater Mrs. Weasley had stitched for her the previous year.]

“...Charlie, you can’t! Your family...they’d be worried sick if you just up and left!”

[The thought of his family did seem to crease the Gryffindor Prefect’s forehead a bit.]

Charlie: “I’ll let them know. I can always write to them...and I can visit sometimes...”

“Of course you can, but you can still do that after you’ve finished school! There’s so much more about dragons you can learn here, Charlie -- about magic. Those things are things that’d be hard to learn much of anywhere else. You’ve come so close, Charlie -- don’t give up on your future now!”

Charlie: “Carey...I know you’re trying to help, but...”

[Charlie swallowed. It looked like it was painful to do.]

Charlie: “...I just...I just don’t see much reason to stay here. It’s not safe anymore. I know you want to believe in the teachers and the Aurors and not get involved with the Vaults again, but...how do you rely on anyone, after someone betrays your trust like that? How do you trust anyone again?”

[The question broke Carewyn’s heart.

It was true she hadn’t trusted anyone completely, since what happened to Jacob -- but to hear Charlie...Charlie talk like this --

The memory of herself and her mother huddled up on the floor sobbing after Jacob’s disappearance overtook her vision.

Carewyn had to take a minute to compose herself before speaking again.]

“...I don’t know.”

[She inhaled and exhaled softly through her nose.]

“...I wish I did. I wish I could say that you’ll trust again, that -- that no one would ever do what Rakepick did again. I wish I knew that. I wish I could promise it.”

[She was unable to look Charlie in the eye, so she kept her gaze locked on the table between them.]

“But one thing I do know -- one thing I can promise -- is that you’re my friend. You were in the Vault with us because I asked for your help -- “

Therefore what you’re feeling -- all of it -- it’s all my fault...

“ -- and I -- I can’t go back and undo that mistake. I can’t go back and stop Rakepick. But I know that we’ll never get through this if you leave. With how scary everything is...all I want is for you and the others to be safe. For you to be happy and together...like we were at Bill’s graduation. Even after everything that went down, everyone was still able to laugh a little, and talk a little, and not worry a little...”

Even if...I’ll never be able to escape R’s shadow, at least you...

[Her blue eyes were full of pain even as she tried hard to keep her voice strong and face stoic.]

“...I understand if...being happy right now isn’t possible. But please...please, Charlie, don’t fight your battle alone.”

[There was a silence. Then Carewyn thought she heard Charlie inhale shakily.

She looked up and was startled to see him fighting back tears.]

“Charlie?”

[Charlie’s lips crinkled up in a crooked smile as he wiped his eyes on the sleeve of his jacket.]

Charlie: “Bloody hell, Carey...way to get me right here!”

[He thumped his chest with his fist, smiling wryly up at her despite his watery eyes.

Carewyn tried to reach out so as to comfort him, but Charlie beat her to it and took hold of her arm. She twisted her arm a little awkwardly so she could clutch at his arm in return.]

Charlie: “You always know what to say, don’t you?”

“I wouldn’t say that.”

Otherwise Ben, Beatrice, and Merula wouldn’t be giving me such a headache.

[Charlie’s eyes softened upon her face as he gave her arm a short squeeze.]

Charlie: “Well, I’ll say it. ...Thank you.”

[Carewyn tilted her head slightly, still feeling a bit wary.]

“...So you’re not leaving?”

Charlie: “No. At least not until I graduate. I reckon you’re right -- there might be some more about dragons I can learn first. And well...I may not be a huge fan of people right now...but I don’t want to leave my family, or my friends.”

[Carewyn offered him a small smile, raising her eyebrows.]

“Or your unofficial twin?”

[Charlie’s face broke out into a more sincere smile.]

Charlie: “Definitely not my unofficial twin.”

[Carewyn’s eyes softened.]

“Oh yeah -- I gave it some thought, by the way. What we can call ourselves. How about ‘Fireballs?’ ”

[As if like a light switch, Charlie’s brown eyes lit up.]

Charlie: “Chinese Fireballs are the only dragon breed that settles in groups. Brilliant!”

[He started to chuckle. The strained, but amused sound reminded Carewyn of Jacob when he’d tried laughing after being locked alone in a portrait for years.]

Charlie: “They’re even red too -- appropriate for a pair of gingers!”

[Carewyn was so happy to see Charlie smiling again, even despite everything. She squeezed his arm that bit more tightly.]

“So, Fireballs?“

Charlie: “(warmly) Fireballs.”

[The two squeezed each other’s arms in something of a quarter-hug. Charlie’s shoulders relaxed visibly, even as the smile left his face and his eyes grew more somber again.]

Charlie: “...Thanks for listening, Carey. For...talking me down. It was nice to get this stuff off my chest...I mean...”

[Carewyn’s heart hurt sympathetically as she recalled Bill’s smiling, freckled face.]

I miss him so much too.

[Charlie’s face once again twisted up in a slightly wry grin.]

[Carewyn looked up, startled.]

“What? He is? But -- but why? He’s supposed to be busy working at Gringotts -- “

[She’d been so blind-sided by the good news that for once, her mask was down, and her voice was higher, girlier, and less stoic than usual.

Charlie seemed all the more pleased at having caught Carewyn so unawares -- his smile was positively cheeky.]

((OOC: Charlie/Carewyn unofficial siblings for life! Ever since the end of year five, Carey’s only gotten closer to Charlie and Bill, and I for one love seeing her with her adopted Weasley brothers. (She’s sorely missing a brother at the moment. *eyes Jacob Cromwell beadily*)

I did consider doing a play on the fact that Carewyn and Charlie’s names both start with “C”, but...well, the thought of their special nickname for each other having something to do with dragons just seemed like the perfect thing to cheer my bb dragon boy up. And Carewyn does love talking about dragons with Charlie. ^.^

Next up -- Bill’s return!! Squee!!))

[jeeperso]

D&D Quotes Without Context

Ravenloft Edition, Har-Akir Arc FINAL

“They. Let’s not misgender the horrible person I plan on burning alive.”

“At least tell them you’re the only one there because you didn’t trust us not to immediately open fire. Which, I will point out, is true.”

“Standard double boss raid tactics.”

"Our real challenge will be to locate their ring though. Didn’t they say they placed it in a hidden location?” “Ask your nerd god?”

"I've got a second broom in the hole, if anyone needs it.”

"Alright... Jonni, Marshall, and Gorbash. Come here, and I'll ask for Ioun to watch over you.” “I will try not to flash the Girls during that time. Try.”

It’s about noon, there is not a cloud in the sky, the sun is beating down. Everyone in the caravan has gone into the city to avoid the fight. Azathoth: "Wee-o-wee-woo...wa wa wa.....wee-o-wee-woo....wa WA…."

However, a barge approaches on the river bank, upon it on a throne sits a mummy in ornate gold. A crier on the skiff opens a scroll "This most supreme authority Lord Ankhtepot has been invited by the Necromancer Nima Galzona to observe their latest creation, the Sunbleacher undead. Feel free to ignore us and continue with the fight.”

Nyarlathotep: "Nima is an egg-laying mammal?”

“Oloch’s been eating his Wheeties. Somehow.”

“Also, Nima? I fucked your boots.”

Oloch: ”If the pyromancer agrees to abandon their efreeti lover to her current fate, and leave the Domains of Dread without her, then I will agree.” Jonni: “Sure.” Nima blinks. "Wow really?” Jonni: “Yup. Pinkie swear.” Marshal: "Jonni, there can be no falsehood. The Master and I WILL hold you to this vow.” Jonni: “Oh, we’ll then, fuck that.” Hex and Eldritch Blast on Nima.

You slice "Nima": to pieces, their head lands at your feet. Then its eyes open and smiles. "Get ready for a surprise!” Gorbash: “And cue the magical bullshit.”

Gorbash: “I didn't realize this was a full on asshole convention.” Jonni: “So, was that Oloch or did they fuse into a whole new asshole?” Gorbash: “I think Nima shoved an asshole into another asshole to make a Bigger asshole. And I feel dirty for having spoken those words.” Nyarlathotep: "Tha's a BIG asshole.” Marshal: "So which dispenses the ranch dressing?” "Stop saying asshole." One of the Nima says. Gorbash: “I will if you all stop being Assholes!”

“I got a shitty plan to find real Nima unless someone has a good plan?”

Three Stooges Nimas.

I should note something, after Oloch removed his cloak, the air around him feels different, dryer and hotter. The sunlight seems harsher. OOC: Does that mean fire type moves do more damage?

"Eddie, Jonni can't die. That's a rule!”

Jonni: “Guys, stupid hope to find real Nima or deal with exploding orc?” Poom: "Always exploding first!”

Anhktepot doesn't want this to play by Don King rules.

"Oh no, Oloch is using Solar Flare!”

"BURNING DEATH!” “I said the same thing to Vesh on our Anniversary.”

OSP: “I didn’t ask if my friend was out of range, I said I cast Fireball.”

“Instant gratification is bullshit. The best revenge is knowing your enemy is miserable.”

“I’m talking about an oath sworn to a major league fucking god! Do you think I want the consequences of that?” "Considering how stupid you are, yeah.”

OOC: Anybody else wanna get Yul Brynnar in play on our side?

Poom teleports to a safe distance. Like Goth Mexico.

Nima: ”Also FYI, me and Hazlik can see and hear you through the magic items we gave you.” Jonni: “I mean, I assumed they could. It’s why I kept using the rod for sexy times.” Nima: "And people think I'm a freak.”

"Darn, wish we had a cantrip to conjure up some popcorn for this.” "Admire later: we're still in the splash zone", Marshal says as he swerves to avoid a meteor.

"I've never trusted cashews.”

"I mean we're both petty, power-mad slut-mages who solve all our problem with dark magic.”

“By the way, books just a copy of the Kama Sutra I shoved in an overdue library book. Left the real one in hell.” “Huh. Wow those are some pictures.” “Yeah, this one is from the dimension where Picasso got freaky.”

Gorbash follows: Poom always knows the best escape routes.

“So… let your mom know, I just finished one blood feud, I’ve got room in my schedule for a new one.”

Irost comes running, wearing a mask and his viol from the city. "Can't talk. Priests are angry. Gotta go.”

Jonni: “Well. Looks like we’re on the road again. Next stop, killing some bitch.” Poom: "New stop, same as the old stop.”

OOC: BRB, if I seem quiet for a few minutes here and there it’s because my body has decided to stop retaining water.

OOC: I just had unexpected dogs in my apartment. OOC2: ...That is either a problem or the opposite of a problem.

OOC: I mean, Hades won't argue being an asshole.

“I DONT EVEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE AND YOUR FACIAL HAIR IS AMAZING!”

OOC: Now he knows all Nima has to do is say "Parmesian" and he will be their personal fight doll.

OOC: Considering our next stop, this:

OOC: I mean, not like the hell-child's gonna be any LESS deadly... Irost: “I'll get the elf outfits ready.”

OOC: Yeah, that necrosplosion almost wiped us.

OOC: ….Those Nimas were Saibamen.

OOC: Or we can mail ourselves somewhere, and rest while we are in transit.

OOC: Itty. Bitty. Living space. OOC2: Comes with the phenomenal cosmic power.

OOC: Speaking of next time, you guys are going to the cornfield.

[kaiju-z]

Seon Adventures Episode 17: Home Intrusions

Last we left off the Cultbusters, the adventurers had been ambushed in their sleep by a Elf Mage and his Death Dog, who put them in a tricky situation. With Amelia down and in need of healing, stat, where do we go from here?! (I mean, you see the image, so that’s not much of a secret...)

On Belli’s turn, she attempts to cast Polymorph on the elven man. With much gusto, he shrugs that off with a counterspell, which in turn leaves Belli with few options to proceed. She chooses to cast a healing word on Amelia, raising the Air Genasi Monk back to her feet at 4 HP and begs her to back away from the magic user.

While  Amelia feels like she just woke up from her best sleep ever, Ficus charges in. Using his daggers, he swings, one after the other, he attacks the target of his choice and, though the first blow connects with the man’s collar bone, that causes him to flinch back and avoid any further damage.

Disengaging, he backs away from the wounded elf....

Intimidated as all hell by Luctan,  the dog lays down and plays dead, submitting.

(And OOC we have a discussion if this makes the dog Luctan’s pet now. And somehow, we end up having to bring up the point that the BABY is not a pet!)

Mournimar’s turn comes and he climbs atop the 5ft rock before him with a run and jump. Up there, he aims and fires with the Savon Bow upon the elf. The arrow strikes true and pierces through the man’s stomach. He stumbles, very nearly gone.

The second arrow fires and pings off a rock, missing. Thinking quickly, Mournimar ducks for cover behind the rock’s safety shape.

Burk’s turn comes.

With his good perception, he finds where the man was standing at, thanks to the noise and visuals of Ficus and Mournimar’s actions. He charges around the corner and swings a finishing move on the man with his Minotaur Axe.

Upon a well aimed strike, Burk explodes the man’s head with impact. Blood and brains and flesh and bone fly everywhere, while  the Death dog whimpers and disappears.

The fight over and done with, Amelia gets showered with love and affection and heals from everyone, before Luctan and Burk loot the body.

Burk finds 200 gold. And he finds a piece of paper with “weird scribbles.” There’s a strange dagger at the man’s hip with an intricate pattern. Also silver bands, like Ficus’. Thusly, Burk asks if Ficus knows the man.

Ficus shakes his head, not able to  recognize him. Especially now with his head a splattered. It’s an independent art form, what they do, so nah.

Luctan takes the dagger and paper, but has difficulty finding the Focus the wizard had been using during the battle.

Belli has much more luck than, well, Luck, with that as she finds his component pouch. Taking his cloak as well, she feels bougie as hell. Which only adds to the matter as she finds 40platinum bulging from the wizard’s socks.  Belli shares the platinum with the party. Each getting 8 platinum for their woes.

Identifying the focus… It’s a small crystal, small glass cone. Seemingly what he had been using for his area of effect spells. But that’s not all.  A slight magical aura comes from the cloak and dagger. Identifying the latter item, she learns it’s identity as The Colak of Elvenkind. An enchanted cloak, which makes it’s user harder to spot on the field of battle (i.e. advantage on Stealth checks).

(After some Fantasy Costco jokes are made...) the party decide on who gets the cloak. Given the noise his armor makes, when moving, they ultimately agree to hand it over to Luctan.

As for the former item... Belli learns that it’s a Blink Dagger. Once per day it can be thrown in any direction and called back to the attuned person without having to waste any actions, beyond thinking it so.

And after some further consideration, Luctan is the one to get the item as well! The boy does love him his sharpy weapons. And it fits the aesthetic with a purple color to the blade itself.

That out of the way, they wonder what to do with the body. As they do so, Ficus checks the body, a bit more deeply as he does an incission on the man’s chest, pulling out a bloodspattered rock with an emblem from inside him.

As Luctan casts his first Prestidigitation to clean that off, Ficus reveals that the rock is an anti-scrying rock. Anyone attuned to it cannot be snooped upon by watchful eyes.

After changing hands a couple of times, Burk gets the rock, receiving it from Luctan, who had received it from Ficus..

Everyone eventually goes back to sleep, deciding to give the would-be assassin an air burial and, in the morning everyone has breakfast 

Upon Luctan’s request, Belli sends a message to Nash to check with her how things were going with Dak, the Changeling Cleric..

“What’s up, what’s going on, how you doing?”

Nash is confused. 

With her acting abilities, Belli copies Nash and gives Luctan an explanation on what Nash said. Thusly, Luck facepalms.

(OOC, there was a bit where Belli by accident said the word phone and the tiefs go  “What’s a phone?!”)

Luck gives instructions to help Belli with the message. “Hello, Nash. This is Belli, asking for Luctan. How’s Dak, what’s he doing?”

Nash wakes up, like “Oh my god, it was real.

“Everything seems fine and normal. Everything’s out of the ordinary, besides the market being wild.”  is her message back to Belli, who refers it to Luctan. Given the Nexus Volcano and demon attack, it made sense that the market would be off kilter now. Hopefully the druids and rangers of The Forestheart Bretheren helped the situation.

Luctan notices that Mournimar isn’t doing well. Most of everyone does as well. Given the way he had bent over and in pain, as well as  Mournimar’s armor being semi-scorched off, it was clear that his abdomen was hit bad by the bastard from the other night.

Belli for that matter also seemed to have received some bad burns from the Fireball the previous night as well.  Luctan is startled by the burns of Belli and Mournimar and just casts Healing word, like a doof.

Now that the party had time to actually talk and think about it, they were curious about Luctan’s sudden burst of magicks and glowy demeanor whenever he’d cast.

Belli: “I mean, would anyone be surprised if Luctan’s a litteral angel?!”

“But I’m a tiefling.” Luctan would respond.

Mournimar and Ficus insight check Luctan on whether he made a deal with a deity or something. But given their low rolls, they honestly have no idea. Joining on the insight checks,  Amelia is pretty sure he’s not lying when he says he’s made no deal at all.

This somehow sparks further conversations about Ficus’ attraction to Luctan and how apparently the Narah family wanna bang lots of despicable people?! There are many sibling shenanigans to be had between the two, with Belli ultimately making Ficus and Mournimar have to defend themselves as she states “Don’t trust the rogues!”

Upon Luctan casting Prestidigitation on the cloak again, to give it a purple and blue look, Amelia tries to speak to him in Primordial, but alas, he doesnt’understand a word she says.

Well fed, well in spirits, the party get back in their carriage and continue on their journey to Crystalgate and beyond~!

On the final leg of this path, they reach the rich subburbs outside the city itself. Where all the famous celebrities of the country reside. Belli notices Fantasy Freddy Mercury’s place. The party see some unbranded guard patrols going around. Checking them out for a moment, before they just continue on their way. Luckily, Luctan cleaned up everyone, retroactively.

It takes about 15 minutes to half an hour before they reach the gates.

It’s pretty instant she recognizes the large gates with N, split open when the gate does. A small forest blocks the view of the house and they can see the roof of the building and for everyone, but Luctan, this is the biggest place they’ve ever seen. About the same size as the city hall in Avantea.

For Belli, the warm nostalgia of home is almost as warming as the knowledge of what’s inside is chilling. Belli is quietly running her hands on the N.

“ What kind of rich assholes live here?” – Burk. 

“We did.” – Belli.

Ficus pricks himself on a small spike of metal and the gates swing open. (To keep out the other side of the family). Special magicks.

This is the home of people, who know their children come home less clean, hence,when the party enter, they are immediatelly cleaned from any dirt that Luctan would have missed along the way, thanks to the Prestidigitation gate.

The forest was an illusion. The mansion is before them. Exageration, but it’s big as hell!

Six fountains on each side. Each small fountain presents an Half-Orc child of varying ages and personalities. Two, identical, are the twins. The child on the right, closest to the house has been vandalized.

- That’s Ficus’.

Belli puts a hand on his forearm. The twins were PISSED! The face is scraped off, the arms are chipped.

After Burk makes a little jab at Ficus, the rogue answers back: “ You may be wide, but you’re still small and I will smother you in your sleep.” Bold words, given that Burk has the strength to use him as a javelin.

While the Narahs talk, Luctan passes Amelia the medalion of Keemis, which she promptly puts it on like a baller.

As they advance ahead, they focus on the last fountain. The biggest fountain in the middle is of Mr. and Mrs. Narah, with baby Belli in the middle.

This all used to seem so big. I never thought I’d see this place be so quiet.”   Belli looks at the fountain of her parents and herself. Her dad, the Orc, her mom, the elf.

With the siblings’ encouragement, Belli moves onward and the party follow her to the double door. The door is unlocked, as she had left it.

In the first little entryway, they see the hooks for cloaks and hats. They see some family items, dusty as hell. Belli runs her hand through them, nostalgia overflowing her heart like a fine wine cup.

  A large set of tables stand long and empty at the front of the party as this is a big ass dining room. Dusty and all that, they yearn to be sat upon once more and warmed with the company of a loving family.

Belli is quiet as she walks around, quieter than she has ever been seen.

As she observes her home, years after she herself had abandoned it, Mournimar joins Amelia in ivestigating for anything that would seem “off”. What they notice is the ash of the fireplace. It’s ash, yeah, nothing magical about it, but the problem was that it was fairly recent. In the last few, at that.

The spot in the room they are in, hasn’t been touched in a while, but the ash is recent.

As she goes to explore another room,  Belli begs Burk not to break anything.

Burk, silent at this request, goes for an entryway on the right. There’s a door in his general direction and he goes for it, Rimefang at his shoulder. Opening the door, the two conclude on three things.

1. The room is a Water Closet.

2. It stinks.

And 3. They have just failed a con save, because for about 6 seconds, they feel themselves poisoned.

Belli enters the kitchen. The chef used to love working here.

(There are lots of  OWO and UWU jokes OOC)

Remembering, Belli notices how the fruit is nasty as hell, but there are some crackers and rations, beanfeasts. Much to be concerned, there seems to be way less of it than since she left. “Weird.”

As everyone picks a place to investigate, Burk checks what he finds to be the music room, full of varying instruments, fitting for a family of Bards to hold onto. There are many kazoos involved. Looking around, Burk’s nose catches that horrible smell again, this time coming from the piano next to him. The stench comes from the keys, but evidently there is nothing that could have made that possible.

He plays the piano and it’s horrible.

Amelia joins Belli and Ficus, reassuring the siblings as they draw closer to the domain of the Narrah Patriarch and Matriarch.

Belli’s hands are shaking asshe tries to open the door, but not really getting there. With Ficus’ help, they get in what looks to be an arts and crafts room.

And she notices it, smells so bad of rot. Paints and dyes, having expired over the years. This is where they were encouraged to pick up hobbies and explore who they wanted to be.

Painting, sculpting or that one time someone wanted to pick up kickboxing, there’s even a dummy inside.

The family study is beyond this and so is the bedroom, which was usually off-limits, for obvious reasons.

“Ficus, are you sure you wanna go on? I’m scared.”

“I mean, I abandoned these people long enough, really.”

They encourage each other to go in.

And do so.

Belli steadily makes her way towards the family bedroom, followed by Ficus.

She walks past the study, where her parents read and stuff. Scattered across the table in an unorganized manner is paperwork of contracts, receipts for gigs they were to play.

It makes sense to them, probably, but to everyone else? Nah. They totally had a system they worked off of.

Many a memories of the family, all of them together, come back to them as they open that final door...

She’s not sure if it makes her happier or less happy that they are still where she left them. It’s almost like their gaze is still on them. Belli is visibly shaken. She takes a step towards her family, her legs give out and she drops to her knees, beginning to sob.

- Ficus is hiding his face behind his fringe and sits himself on the bed, grabs the hand of their mom and he cries as well.

Amelia joins in. Them weeping is her siren call to come in.

Amelia comforts Belli as best she can, damn it! They are so in this moment that... the moment they hear shuffling from the study, they almost don’t hear it. But they do!

When she goes in, she notices a trail of paperwork falling off, like someone brushed it off the desk and Belli must make a Con save. She’s too emotionally distraught to be phased by the smell that follows.

  “Who’s here?!” – Belli shouts and demands, which prompts the other half of the party to join her in the study. All but Ficus, who remains seated in the bedroom.

Luctan, Burk and Mournimar run inside and they hear increased breathing of something big in the room. Flickering, out of invisibility, is a huge, hulking horned beast with spikes along his back and hulking mouth.

Mournimar makes a con save and is poisoned temporarily.

Mournimar screams in infernal, demanding to know what that thing is. Belli does the same in orcish. The thing speaks in abyssal. Belli hears guttural groaning, it sounds like vomiting and snarling at the same time.

The fight begins with Burk charging in, swinging his axe at the beast, hitting it several times, causing gashes on the hell beast’s body. But alas.  The stench really fucks with everything, giving those, who have entered the room in the monster’s viscinity disadvantage.

The thing is not able to be hit so easily, with the stink getting in the way. Frustrated, Amelia strikes with her gloves and hits the fucker. AND!  Using her Open Hand Technique, Amelia knocks the creature prone.

Belli is beyond furious and screams with all the anger and fear and grief she has in her.

Without even thinking, she casts Shatter again.

The irony is that the only thing to make the save, other than Amelia is the thing. Burk, Mournimar and Belli take 11 damage. Amelia and the creature take 5.

Belli copies the creature’s voice, some weird dialect and Mournimar basically hears that it claimed this place as it’s territory. Belli is enraged. She will have none of that!    Luctan recognizes that people have fought these before, he had seen them. This demonic toad like monster was a fiend in nature.

Tanking with the con save, he doesn’t get poisoned. But the smell is still pretty bad, so, as he comes in, he casts Prestiditation, before pointing at the creature.

“You may be a hell beast, but we? We are the Cultbusters!” and he accidentally casts Bless on  Burk, Mournimar and Amelia.

Action surge follows, Luctan tris to use a Hellish Rebuke on the large red creature, but in it’s stead something else comes to his mind. Sacred Flame, but the creature ends up succeeding on it’s save!

Luctan pulls out West Wounder and East Ender as he gets on the table, before the being, known as a Hezrou, releases a monstrous roar, which summons six lesser creatures from firey portals that open on the ground.

Based on an educated guess, the tieflings recognize the monsters as Dretches.

Inferior demons, Luctan  had encountered some, but not for long since they’re fairly weak. The creature roars again.

Mournimar pulls his shortsword out and goes for the attack on the dretch to his front And then repeats the attack with the sword. Hitting with the help of the bless. At the end of his turn, he casts Hunter’s Mark on the Hezrou.

Burk attacks and thanks to Luctan’s energy thing, he strikes true. With Fury of the Small, he hits even harder then and then another powerful hit adds up to further damage the large monster.

With his bonus action, he donkey punches the Dretch behind him. Burk cloks the dretch in the back of the head and it falls over.

Amelia strikes with a mighty gloved punch, finding the good shit, decking the thing in it’s wounds.

( “Ames is real good at fisting gashes.” – Cat, OOC)

As a bonus action, she uses her quarterstaff to smack the dretch closest to Belli, focusing it’s ire on herself as she harms it nice and good.

The strikes continue and she hits hard enough to make one of it’s eyes explode, blood and gore flying everywhere by the end as she finishes it off with a roundhouse kick, decapitating it. The battle gets chaotic as hell.

While Mournimar sets a creature on fire as a response to the two deretches at his side slashing at him, Belli points a finger at the Hezrou and chants “ You’re nothing but slime that I’ll crush beneath my heel. “

And promptly turns the Hezrou into a slug.

Intimidated by the Bard’s magic and her words that follow, one of the dretches teleports away through a gate, terrified as all hell by the half-orc.

As the others tear to shreds the remaining dretches, they are left with but one real target to worry about. The now transformed Hezrou.

After some deliberations on how to proceed, Burk picks up the slug. Most of the party decide to finish it off, while Belli goes to check on her brother’s mental state.

So, lead by Burk,the rest of the Cultbusters go outside.

Burk elaborates that he wanted to finish things here, outside, because he wanted to hold onto the promise he had made to Belli when they had first seperated in the mansion.

Everyone gets into position as Burk sets the slugged Hezrou in between the four of them.

On the count of three, they attack.

1.

2..

3!!!

Burk swings the axe, Amelia strikes with her fists, Mournimar fires the bow from a distance and Luctan attempts that Sacred Flame again (I seriously need to raise the boy’s Charisma for that DC check > A <;;;)

All their attacks combine to a whole 30 damage on the creature, which immediatelly changes back. It looks hurt. And pissed the fuck off.

Regardless, Burk just strikes with blow after blow upon the thing, hitting it with his axes. It’s almost like chopping wood, really. Going around it and hitting certain areas, spilling blood. The thing wobbles on it’s last legs.

Then comes the monk’s turn.

Amelia stares at him, the guy who dared try and take her friend’s home.  Basically, fuck this dick. She strikes him once, then again. And again and again and again! Blow after blow, Amelia is merciless in her assault on the fiend.

The Power Of Kyle compels her (CHUG THAT MOUNTAIN DEW)

Amelia finishes the thing off with a powerful bash. Almost in slow motion, she jumps and elbows the Hezrou in the snoot. On the drop back down she knees him in the jaw. It bites it’s own tongue out, which flies off.

Dead and falling to the ground, it turns to goup whch spills on the four of them. Not a problem as Luctan casts Prestidigitation almost as quick as theyget splashed, like on some Nikleodeon game show.

.

As the party was finishing business, Belli had been checking on Ficus.

Ficus is glazed over. He looks dead to the world.

Belli walks over to him and puts a hand on his shoulder. “Ficus, can you hear me?” There’s a very slight nod. “There was a fight in the other room. Looks like some demons were living here for a while.”

“You know, when I thought we were gonna go back to face our demons here, I didn’t think it would be literally." There’s a slight pause. “I have no clue why I came back here.”

“You came here, you wanted to come home.”

“Is this home?”

“Home was where the twins would set a giant scavenger hunt for us, where mum would readto us and tell us the most amazing stories. We were happy, there was music and laughter and family and I-I could’ve probably stayed here as a kid. I didn’t have to leave. We had food, I-I could’ve gone for help, but I just left and I ran away like you did, because I didn’t think I could make a difference. And I still don’t think I can.”

Can she?

Belli looks at the petrified rock that was once her family... And something clicks in her head. A thought. An arcane thought at that.

In all this mess, adrenaline and all, her brain going faster than it has in a long time. She knows that there are divine magicks that can restore people, despite all kinds of awful circumstances. It’s a very high level she’s after, but maybe she could fix this, or get someone to fix it.

Higher level than someone like Nash. But with the right friends, she could maybe get them back.

“ You know, Ficus. I don’t think it’s over for us yet.”  she smiles.

“Ugh, I gotta go through more shit?!”

I think we could bring them back if we have the right help. I don’t know who or where to even start, but it’s got to be better, than living your life, thinking you failed the people, who mattered to you must.”

The mom statue is semi broken… Belli understands this. They might not be a full family again, but it’ll be better than the current situation.  Belli will definitely find out who did this and she will kill them.  Ficus will want to join this vengeance quest.

She takes out the gemstone and puts it in her mother’s broken hand. “We’re not done here. We’re not done, Ficus.”

The light will shine upon them.

"I’m totally gonna steal some of their shit, though.” Ficus says, brightened up some.

Belli begs Ficus to hide some things in his room, in case Luck wanders in there. Much to Ficus’ horror, he realizes that his room was kept exactly the same.Which brings the man to make a dash for his chambers.

As the others finish things off, Belli goes to her old room. It feels so weird to her how small the room is now.

With the Hezrou dead and gone, Archie rides on Morgan’s back, while Luctan brings in the horses and carriage.

Before they can finish the ride to Crystalgate, the party decide to take a breather inside the mansion for a bit, get their heart rates down to normal again.

Up in the hallway, the walls are lined up with the family in all their ages. Starts with cheap caricatures of Mr. and Mrs. Narrah. Going full circle we get realistic artistic stuff with the whole family.

There’s an obvious missing picture of Ficus.  As Belli explains, she shows them the bar on the upper floor as well, in case they’re up for some drinks.

While the others chill outside, Belli brings the tieflings to Ficus’ room. Ficus, who is in the middle of trying to hide all his shit. He was tearing the posters off and apart. Too bad he didn’t consider his sister’s skills and moxxy as Belli casts Minor Illusion and recreates the posters.

The posters show the openness of Ficus’ sexuality and his exploration.

Mourni just drops to the ground, looking under the bed, while the Narrahs have a Mage Hand rivalry over him.

They accidentally break a box of thigs;;; Ficus’ belongings, lots of kinky things of Ficus’ stash.

Let’s just say Ficus has a healthy interest in anathomy.  But the siblings definitely agree that their brother Keem had the most porn of the kids. The first singer of the family.

Rather than laugh at Ficus, Luctan just chuckles, amused at Ficus’ opennes. He appreciates this and finds him sweet.

Then Belli drops the bombshell.

They have hottubs further down the floor.

Luctan is required to wear a bathing suit for the hot tub, though.

“I am a free spirit!” proclaims Luctan, protesting as he holds the elf baby under arm, having pickedh im back up from the arts and crafts room he had left the youngster in, before joining the fight.

- Pretty soon enough, everyone joins inside the hottub in the far right part of the floor. As Burk teaches Rimefang how to doggy paddle, Mournimar starts a bit of a splashing war with Luctan, who eventually gives in.

Amelia just relaxes with Archie, while Belli tries to bribe Luctan with money to shave his beard off.

It almot works, as Luctan’s  greedy streak shows itself, but the deal falls through

It doesn’t take long for Mournimar and Belli to start trying to outperform each other with cannonball dives in the large tub, while Luctan goes to a more secluded part of the floor, in the opposite tub, across the corridor, where he is joined by Ficus.

All is well.

Even the baby gets to relax, floating on a ring.

Once they take their good break, the party get dressed and leave the mansion, closing the door after themselves shut. And they move on the path to Crystalgate.

They are a day out from Crystalgate.

Given the area around Crystalgate is planes, pretty much as they step out of the estate the mansion was on, the shape of the huge city… for all of them this is the hugest settlement they’ve seen.

Belli had been here before as a child, naturally, but still it was freaking enormous.

The walls are a good 60ft high, even above that they can see three huge towering spires. Twisted in shape. Double helix, almost, but not quite spiral-y. Three spirals in parallel. Further to the north, left of the spirals are lots of tops of taller buildings, huge clusters of buildings, taking huge portions of the city.

Luctan climbs the top of the carriage and just stares ahead into the city. Somewhere in there, the Gentlemen hold his limbs.

Mournimar joins him up there and gives him an empassioned encouraging speech.

“Bro, that’s gay."- Ficus.

“Yeah, no shit.” - Mournimar.

Luctan stares ahead. “I’m coming for you.”

The Wheel Of Time Keeps Spinning. Let’s Rock.

We travel through the night. Mournimar, half-asleep, taps Luctan’s shoulder and points out constellations. Finally, some fucking peace.

Going deep into inner roads of the outer city, the party ultimately decide to take a rest inside the Crusty Challice inn for the night. A shady inn, where no questions need be asked.

As they get closer within Crystalgate, Amelia makes a Wisdom save ( 23 – 6), much like she had done in the morning, after they took off from the ambush spot.

For a brief second Amelia feels lightheaded, but she shakes it off immediately.

Room arrangements are made. Burk takes a room for himself and Rimefang, Belli, Orion, Mournimar and Morgan get one together, Ficus takes a room seperately and Luctan and Amelia are to hang out. Purple teeeam~!

And as the lot of them go to bed, the episode comes to an end.

Previous Episode / Next episode

[razzlekitty]

2 + 29 for Sash, 38, 46 + 47 for Mama?

Sashrui

2: Do they have any daily rituals?

Sashrui had too many rituals, or at least Trobu thought so. They were supposed to go to Crossroads but at this rate it would take forever. First was her morning stretches followed by spending a quiet moment in from of her small loa alter to a loa unfamiliar to Trobu. Lighting herbs and letting the smoke billow around her.

Then she’d eat but not just eat. To Trobu this took forever since she often wrote down things in her journal as she did so. He’d read what she was writing if he were literate. Then she’d take her time getting packed and ready, petting and tending to her raptor. Trobu tried once to help and get her raptor ready for her but Mobu wasn’t having it.

He didn’t enjoy the savage bite nor explaining to Sashrui why he knocked out her beloved steed with one punch.

29: Reaction to sudden extrapersonal disaster (eg The house is on fire! What do they do?)

It was a normal day, a good day. Peaceful, quiet. Sash sat in her study reading a book casually nibbling on strawberries waiting for Trobu to return back with some supplies she’s bogusly sent him away on. Items she didn’t really need but she was more looking for peace. Then she heard a high pitched whirling. Not familiar with anything mechanical she paused and stared at the long winding cave entrance.

Suddenly there was an explosion followed by screaming and the horrid sound of scraping metal. She stood up and cast a shield as a fireball came rushing in. The ball of death safely passed around her but set her books and desk on fire. And her curtains, picture and well… anything around her. Sashrui screamed as she started smacking the fire out.

Trobu came running in, also on fire screaming. “TROBU CRASH! HOT HOT! OH! SHIT. TROBU DEEP SHIT.” He screamed as he tried to run out of the cave. Sashrui screamed his name as she held her hands up, summoning an powerful holy spell. The brilliant white light boomed from her like a shock wave, putting out the minor fires. Leaving her able to use her water pitcher to put out the rest.

The spell knocked Trobu into a wall, putting out his fire as well. He started to thank her but was instantly assaulted with her staff and painful dark magic. “DID YOU CRASH YA STUPUID FLYIN’ TING IN ME CAVE?! I SWEAR TO THE LOAS, I’MMA KILL YOU!”

((Why do you do this shit to her? You’re evil Dee.))

Mama Bear

38: What recharges them when they’re feeling drained?

It had been a long few days in the field. The Broken Shore was secure for now but this was all to efforts from the champions that fought to keep it so. Bear sat under the tent, slumped in her chair. Leaning to the side with her right arm laid on the table. Her eyes closed she did her best to ignore the many cuts, gashes and bruises on her aching body. Her lame shoulder was inflamed and she kept her left arm close.

She’d not even had a bath although she did take some of her armor off. The only thing that gave her away as still alive was her ears flicking at the distant sounds of thunder and her slow breathing. She felt the boys presence around her but she didn’t move, not even as the sound of something wooden being placed in front of her. But one scent pulled her weary eyes open.

“Is that Mulgore honey bread?” She said weakly then her brows rose. She saw the generous sized mug of ale and she sat her aching body up slowly and reached for it. “It that ale?!” She said in a more lively tone. The elven paladin chuckled and nodded. “I also got you a plate of- oh hey Bear? Might um. Wanna take that easy…” He said as she chugged the ale as it was fresh water and she’d been days in the desert.

“That’s dwarven. It’ll go straight to your head… You probably already know that.” He said as she slammed the empty mug down. “Earthmother keep you. Such a good boy. Thank you.” She said, seemingly having a bit more life now.

46: If they were to fall in love, who (or what) is their ideal?

*FLASH BACK!*

“Did it hurt?” The Grimtotem bull asked as he backed away from the sword wielding Mistrunner. “You haven’t touched me yet.” She chided with a confused look, her dusty blonde mane tussling in the wind. He smiled and chuckled as he dodged her charging towards him, swinging her swords. “Ha! No, no. I mean when you fell from the heavens.” He cooed in a sauve tone with a smile as he ducked behind a tree.

Bear flustered and her aim missed as she failed to hit him, her light cream colored face easily giving away the blushing in her cheeks. “You ridiculous Grimtotem! Stop dodging me you coward and fight!” But no sooner had she said that he’d shifted into a massive black bear and slammed into her with full force.

The two tussled and although Bear was honestly trying to kill him, it was clear he was holding back. He bit her hilt but missed her hand nor tossed his head violently. His paw slammed down on her other sword to stop other attacks but his free paw only steadied himself. He made no attempts to slash at her face.

His mass meant that even as she kicked him he still had her pinned down, and being a bear her kicks didn’t do much in this position anyways. His muzzle even held a smug smile as his blue eyes, those beautiful sky blue eyes just looked at her. But as a daughter of guardian druids she knew how to get a bear off her.

She yanked her sword down and slammed her head into his, enough so that this dazed him and she was able to let her other hand free and punch him in the nose. He yelped and let go. Giving Bear time to punch him again and get him off her. The two fought viciously for a while but no matter how hard Bear came at this Grimtotem druid, she could not best him.

Yet he still held back. She only had scrapes and bruises as she knelt down gasping for breath as she looked at him. He shifted back and wiped the blood from his brow, showing much more injury than her. She paused, leaving herself open but he still didn’t attack. Was he not a Grimtotem? Why did he not kill her?

“Ach, ow. Can you heal me?” Bear scoffed and brushed off dirt from her cheek. “Are you crazy? No!” She snapped in retort. But his smile, that handsome smile and soulful blue eyes made her stomach flutter in a way she’d not felt before. “Please? I scraped my knee when falling for you.” He said piteously.

Bear blushed deeper and laughed. “You’re so stupid.” She snort laughed. Both stopped when the horn of the Mistrunner scouts sounded, her name being called in the distance. For the first time, there was genuine fear in his eyes as he looked up. She looked at him. She could have charged again, kept him busy till her tribe arrived then she could finally kill him. But she she didn’t. She only said one word. “Go.” He smiled and got up. “Til we meet again.” He nodded as he shifted into a great black stag, his hooves kicking up dirt and grass as he took off into the forest.

((Her Ideal lover would be cheesy romantic but able to actually best her in combat.))

47: How do they express love?

Answering OOC because my brain is dying and this headache won’t go away. Bear is a very tender soul. She shows love by hugs, kisses, mane braiding and cuddling. Just spending quiet time watching a sunset with a loved one.

[masterofmusic]

My Issues With OUAT

Alright guys, you know I have issues with A&E’s mess of a show. I love it, but I am disappointed at how they decided to write it. It’s full of dropped storylines, plotholes, underdeveloped characters, OOC characters, overused plot devices, you name it. So I decided to list all my issues with the show, and maybe I’ll give my solutions in a different post. Here we go (I’ll edit this if I miss any)

Season 1:

Curse broke too quickly. And I think that’s where the trouble started- once they reached this point, they had no idea where to go with it. Knowing that the Black Fairy is the supreme evil, I’d introduce her here in some capacity, so we can develop and build up to the final battle properly- especially as she is vital to the Dark Curse mythos. Put backstory of Blue and Fiona here as well- we get more info on fairy culture and start the “shady blue fairy” thing. 

Realms fully explored here: Enchanted Forest, Wonderland, Fairy Realm, Atlantica (mermaids)

Villains- Regina, Rumple, Black Fairy, Blue Fairy, Cora

Season 2:

They killed Cora off too soon. That’s my main gripe here, there’s so much more they could have done with Cora- have her linger in SB longer so there would be more Regina and Cora development (hell, Snow included). We could have incorporated OUATIW here, when Regina questions what she’s been up to in Wonderland. We get more detail of Cora’s ruling years as the Queen of Hearts (including Alice meeting Cora). Cora lives on as a villain- mother/daughter time.  Regina discovers the Cora/Rumple affair, so that can be explored as well. 

Emma and Snow going to the EF: more could be done here, including a full background of Mulan and Aurora (Maleficent too, including Lily’s father). Cora again, chance to develop her character.

Blue gets more screentime- more buildup of Fiona

Along with Frankenstein, Dracula comes into play as well.  

Also the finale- there should be consequences of Regina’s electroshock torture. No mention of nerve damage? Really? 

Realms explored: Storybrooke, Enchanted Forest, Wonderland, Atlantica, Fairy Realm

Villains- Same as season 1, plus Maleficent 

Season 3: 

Zelena. Oh man Zelena. We get the wicked witch, but such a dumb backstory. We’re gonna fix this- develop her character more, give her way more screentime. Introduction of the Zades relationship. Cora again with Zelena- but different father. For Zelena to be so powerful, she could have a father like Merlin. This could tie in Camelot. 

Neverland arc- Yeah um let’s make Neverland look more like Neverland, yeah? Plotwise, Robbie is excellent, but I feel we need something extra going on here. Not sure what- maybe Tink and the mermaids get more focus?

Oz arc- More development of Oz culture. Why is magic so taboo here as opposed to the EF? 

Regina Vs. Zelena- an actual witch fight. One that takes more than 5 seconds. 

Robin Hood- Backstory. Outlaw Queen. Like, Sherwood Forest, Nottingham, etc. Also soulmate thing- maybe Robin and Regina have met in the past and Rumple made them forget? 

Oh yeah. Regina puts herself under the sleeping curse this time, and Robin has to wake her. This is how the soulmate thing ties in. 

Time travel plot- same, except Marian is not brought back. 

More development of the Missing Year- Outlaw Queen galore. 

Realms explored: Neverland, Enchanted Forest, Oz, Underworld (Zades), Camelot (Zelena’s origins as the daughter of Merlin)

Villains: Regina, Zelena, Cora, Rumple, Black Fairy, Hades

Season 4:

Dark One mythos origin here due to Rumple’s plot. Everything stays the same, but we go into the origins more. Nimue/Merlin, and all the other dark ones get a small backstory so we know the full history of all their shenanigans, and how absorbing the powers of all the previous dark ones affects Rumple. With Merlin, he creates Excalibur and defeats Nimue and all that, but here we see him in his mansion mourning the loss of Zelena- the daughter stolen from him. His mission is to find her- we understand more about Zelena’s unique powers. Her breaking the laws of time travel magic is a big deal. 

The author mythos is explained better here as well. Henry gets more to do, is actually important as the author. 

Frozen arc- Not much changes, but Ingrid doesn’t die. Instead, she’s Cora’s third daughter- conceived after Regina due to a safety measure. Cora was unsure if Regina would take the throne, so she went after Arendelle’s royal line. The ice magic comes from a blend of Cora’s magical genetic line and the King of Arendelle’s nordic genes. Ingrid meets Regina and Zelena, they bond. Ingrid becomes Queen of Arendelle after her release from the urn. 

Fiona and Blue continuation of story as a subplot, more buildup to final battle

Maleficent arc- Focus on Lily/Lily’s father. Interaction with Regina in the past/present, her own storyline with Aurora. Ursula and Cruella stay the same.

ZLENA WAS NEVER MARIAN. No baby drama, no love triangle mess. Good lord. 

Cora is still around being Cora. 

Heroes and Villains AU- we give this more than one episode. Maybe explore how Regina dying for Henry affects Robin

Regina becomes the Dark One instead of Emma. This triggers Cora’s remorse at how she treated her daughter, once she sees what the curse is doing to her. Zelena and Ingrid both are determined to save their sister. Robin gets more of a role. Rumple/Henry/Emma/Charmings involved

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention ships. Outlaw Queen is a big focus, as well as Zades, Snowing, Rumbelle, and yes, Captain Swan. 

Realms explored: Atlantica (Ariel/Ursula), Enchanted Forest, Camelot, Arendelle, Fairy Realm, Oz

Villains- Cora, Regina, Black Fairy, Zelena, Ingrid, Rumple, Maleficent, Hades

Season 5: 

Camelot arc- the gang has to go the Camelot to find Merlin and save Regina from the darkness- she’s gone worse than EQ mode. Wearing more exposed outfits, etc. Merlin finally meets Zelena, tells her of her potential for true light, as he was responsible for the Dark One curse and she is the counter to it. She is the one that can save Regina. Cue Zelena redemption! Morgana Le Fay is introduced as Cora’s mother! 

Arthur is an ass. Hits on Regina, tells her that if she hooks up with him she won’t be burned at the stake for being a witch (magic is outlawed in Camelot) 

We see how the darkness continues to consume Regina- Epic Outlaw Queen development (Dark Outlaw Queen at first, then Robin protects her from the witch hunters). Zelena breaks the curse on her sister. 

These witch hunters are good at what they do- in the midst of it all, they kidnap Zelena (they sense something different about her magic). She is held captive somewhere in Camelot- discovers they wanted her for the demigod baby she carries. 

Underworld arc- We meet Hades, who is in a rage over the kidnapping of his wife. He summons a portal to Camelot and sucks everyone else to the Underworld. Everyone else finds out about Zades, and it is revealed to them that she’s pregnant. He asks them to get Zelena back. We get Hades backstory on Olympus and meet other gods like Zeus, Poseidon, Athena, etc. What Hades’ life has been like pre-Zelena, character backstory. Other gods have a bigger role- maybe the gang ends up on Olympus somehow?

They find Zelena, but she’s in bad shape. Close to death. The only way to heal her is ambrosia- she becomes a goddess (because would Hades have let her stay mortal, for her to eventually die and for him to be alone again? No.)

Regina has to deal with meeting the souls of her victims and apologizing for everything. 

Subplot- Merida and Mulan backstory! We visit Imperial China and Dun’Broch, how did Mulan become a mercenary? 

Realms visited: Underworld, Camelot, Oz, Enchanted Forest, Dun’Broch (Merida)

Villains- Regina, Zelena, Ingrid, Cora, Hades, Rumple, Black Fairy, Arthur

Season 6:

Origin of the dark curse is the same, but now that we’ve been building Fiona’s story for 6 seasons, this is actual payoff. Blue is shady AF. Lots of time spent at the fairy realm. 

Rumple family drama with Gideon/Fiona/Henry

Land of Untold Stories- we explore this more. 

Wish realm- We spend more time here too. except that actual Robin gets sucked up with Regina and they encounter the banished, older queen locked up. 

Split Queen- only difference here is that Regina becomes whole again and takes the EQ back inside her, becoming one person again, learning to deal with her darkness. OUTLAW QUEEN WEDDING Y’ALL (and eventual pregnancy)

Regina is pregnant! Praise the gods! (both Mills women are pregnant at the same time- cue comedic relief). Ingrid/Cora/Regina/Zelena finally feel like a family unit. 

Final Battle time- This is it. The culmination of 6 seasons and it’s hella epic. Fiona casts her curse because she’s just plain evil, and its chaos. The realms are collapsing, and everyone has to step up and save them. We go to each realm and save it like in Kingdom Hearts, Regina’s castle is the Traverse Town hub. There’s at least an hour long battle between everyone else and Fiona- think Battle of Hogwarts/Helms Deep from LOTR rolled into one. It’s one giant magic battle with swords and bows and fireballs and it’s epic. It takes a lot to bring Fiona down. But she is defeated eventually. 

Epilogue- Everyone goes back to the Enchanted Forest. Regina and Robin rule as King and Queen, welcome a daughter. Snow and Charming are no longer the main royal line with the birth of Regina’s daughter. Zelena is Empress of Oz, visits Hades in the Underworld and her sister in the EF, has a daughter. (Cora’s magical bloodline can only have daughters). Ingrid is Queen of Arendelle, etc. Henry and Emma invent a way to have easy portal hopping, so that people can cross realms back to Storybrooke with ease. There. No season 7 nonsense. 

Whew! that was long!

Season 7: NOT ENCHANTED FOREST VERSION 2

ok, so I I know I said this wouldn’t contain season 7, but this last episode gave me an idea. Regina and Robin are ruling in the Enchanted Forest, like where I left off with season 6, but all is not well. Somewhere in the kingdom, a witch named Oriana Gothel is stirring up trouble, creating the Coven of the Eight. 

Why? Well, Gothel thinks the magical balance of light and dark needs to be restored after Fiona’s defeat- the practice of dark magic has become nonexistent in the Enchanted Forest as a result of Regina’s reign. Deciding to “restore balance to the force”, she recruits 7 promising dark witches for the coven, with the goal of resurrecting Fiona. Fiona’s her idol- the darkest of them all. With Fiona back, Gothel believes that a new world order will be established and things will be as they should (think Voldemort and his view of purebloods, but replace that with dark witches/wizards).

Obviously, Regina/Cora/Ingrid/Zelena aren’t going to stand for this, but this doesn’t stop Gothel from trying to recruit them. The Mills family is going to have to team up once again, this time with the forces of Oz, Camelot, and Arendelle behind them. The stakes are high, with young children to protect from Gothel’s greedy hands. 

Subplot 1: Rapunzel (Megan Warner). Rapunzel has  2 daughters and a loving husband, but she has magic, was the first person approached by Gothel. When Rapunzel refuses to join the coven, she’s locked in the tower. Victoria Tremaine (Gabrielle Anwar) is recruited instead. We find out that Victoria is Cora’s sister.

Subplot 2: Tiana and Dr. Facilier. The voodoo doctor is very interested in Gothel’s plan, offers her his help in finding recruits. 

Subplot 3: Rumple and The Guardian. The Guardian will be someone that can withstand the Dark One curse without going insane- he searches to find the person that he can finally pass the Dark One curse off to. However, things are complicated when he finds out that Mommy Dearest is awake. 

Realms visited: Enchanted Forest, Oz, Camelot, possibly Underworld 

Villains: Gothel, Fiona, Facilier

General gripes:

* More Regina backstory that’s not her searching for Snow. What was her marriage like in the early years? What was her relationship with her mother/father growing up a princess? What if her and Zelena met more than that once?

* More development of characters like Aurora, Cinderella, Ruby, etc. 

* No more character assassinations- like seriously, Emma, Regina, Snow, Belle, and Rumple’s characters were all destroyed 

* Too many memory curses. Like seriously, no more. 

*No more recycled plots for Rumple/Rumbelle

* Development of Zelena. True development- not just some flashbacks of her being jealous of Regina. More time building up Zades. Zelena spends time with Henry being his aunt. 

* No musical. Just unnecessary, and doesn’t fit the tone of the show. 

* Timeline disaster- we establish a solid, concrete timeline. No more “many years ago” and conflicting flashbacks. 

* Maleficent- Nothing against Kristin, but what the hell did they do to Maleficent? She’s not as evil as she was in the movie

* More effort put into magic battles- think Harry Potter level of CGI and effort

* Regina’s redemption- this could be handled better- you can’t redeem someone that doesn’t regret killing hundreds of people, and still has a vault full of hearts 

* explanation of magic/laws of magic. 

* actual sex scenes- not quite HBO levels but almost. 

*More magical creatures- we have werewolves, so where are the vampires?

If I missed anything, or if I can improve on things,  let me know!