#6 millenia later

[snackleggg]

Anyway, here's how I headcanon timelord ageing works.

Only applies to their first body:

From when they're loomed until they are age 8 they age like a regular human

At age 8 their ageing slows down to around 15 years equalling 2 years of physical change (this isn't because of the schism, its more that this is the age they look into the schism bc of this being the point of slower aging)

This continues until they physically reach the age of around 40, then their ageing picks up again to be probably only a little slower than that of a human (every 2 years would be 1 year of physical ageing)

Post-first body ageing:

Every body after the first gains longer and longer "life span" so to speak (which means how long they can have that body before succumbing to "old age" would get longer with each regeneration, even if they regenerated with an old body)

Similar to the first body, after a certain amount of time the body's ageing will started rapidly increasing in speed

[babushkatty]

Tranquil SAGAU - Part 5

-> Part 1

-> Part 4

-> Part 6

Crepus Ragnvindr had been ready to die.

Ursa the Drake was a living legend amongst people of Mondstadt, a terror beyond comprehension that left destruction and death in its' wake for a millenia, with no equal to threaten it.

Utterly uncontested and utterly beyond control.

The only way to survive Ursa the Drake was to never cross path with it at all, he knew that, but it did nothing to quell his resolve.

Crepus had already been reaching for his Delusion, ready to lay down his life to protect the caravan, to protect his son with everything he had despite how hopelessly outmatched he was, despite swearing to himself to never use the Delusion at all--

His sons were worth so much more than any personal values he swore to uphold.

But he hesitated.

He didn't know why he hesitated. Ursa was right there, playing around with his son like he wasn't one of the strongest Knights of Favonius Mondstadt had, like he wasn't one of the strongest people he knew, like he wasn't trying his best to protect everyone, despite being so terribly young and undeserving of such a heavy burden that should have been his instead. The drake could have chosen any moment to get serious, to stop playing with its' food, to kill his son without even so much as trying, so why was he hesitating?

Something deep inside told him to wait.

He didn't know if it was mere instinct, if it was a higher power staying his hand or something else entirely -- but he hesitated just long enough to hear a roar from the distance.

He had to dig his feet into the ground and brace himself so the sudden storm wouldn't sweep him off his feet as it did Diluc.

His eyes watered as he tried to keep them open.

Ursa screeches a horrible sound that has his ears ringing as a dragon the color of the sky itself landed roughly on the drake -- pinning it to the ground even while it trashed and tried to throw the dragon off.

Faintly, he remembered the tales his Opa shared over a candle when they both couldn't sleep. Stories of a brilliant azure dragon blessed by Anemo itself, a dear friend of Lord Barbatos that has supposedly fallen when valiantly defending Mondstadt from a danger many centuries past.

And then a person he hadn't noticed beforehand at all slipped down from the dragon's (one of the Four Winds, he couldn't help but think hysterically, high on adrenaline and hope both) back, looking as casual as casual one could be despite the grand entrance and the dangerous drake still wiggling around underneath the dragon.

Off-handedly, he noted that they looked like they rolled out of bed and didn't bother changing. It was such a contrast against the majesty of the dragon it brought a little clarity to his mind and finally let him think a little.

He didn't reach for the Delusion again.

The conversation between the two flew over his head almost entirely as he worked on centering himself. He caught bits and pieces, of course, something about stalling and about being able to put Ursa down permamently (which he noted to himself so he could ask later, far too shaken to really focus on it now, but knowing it was too important to Mondstadt, to himself, to the safety of his sons to simply forget).

He only really got back to himself when he was mid-handshake with the mystery dragon raider, a wave of calm washing over him and the fog he hadn't even realized was muddling his senses lifting from his mind. The weird feeling of hesitation that stopped him from using the Delusion seemed to almost purr at him in satisfaction like a smug cat, before it slipped away like the wind.

He couldn't help but grin brightly at the newly introduced (Name), feeling an invisible weight lift off his shoulders.

The Knights of Favonius came with Kaeya at their helm soon after, most likely having assembled in a hurry after getting Diluc's hawk and hurrying all the way here as much as the horses and the armor allowed.

Kaeya was frazzled, worried and looking like he'd collapse from relief when he saw everyone was fine.

Kaeya was fine.

Healthy.

Uninjured.

Logically, he knew he would be fine. He knew Kaeya was far from the danger and that he was surrounded by other talented, strong Knights, but the physical reminder as he hugged both his sons tightly was appreciated.

Crepus Ragnvindr had been ready to die, but he was glad it hadn't come to that.

He had a feeling that had it not been for (Name), things would not have ended so favorably though.

A feeling of warm, soft gratitude swelled up in his heart and he couldn't help but invite them for dinner to show his thanks, at least partly. A bit of food hardly made a dent in the debt he owed them, but it was a start.

He'd think how to possibly thank the Dragon of the East at a later date.

Perhaps Elzer or Adeline would have some ideas?

☆(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ* ✨ Author Note✨

Some Crepus POV as a lil treat for everyone, to show that this truly isn't a cult fic. There is no obsession, no immediate recognition, just a bunch of really nice feelings when you're around All-Mother.

Though Crepus was a bit busy freaking out about Ursa and his sons and the assumed KIA Dvalin popping back into existence only to skeedadle immediatelly after (honestly, we should all aspire to be like Dvalin, what a damn diva), so those nice feelings didn't exactly get a front row performance XD

Guess who's gonna be really suspectible to All-Mother's presence? There are multiple answers, one of them we've already met!

Well, we met two, but one was more prevalent. Semantics, semantics~ *waving hand dismissively*

I'm getting a lot of comments and repost tags and I love each and every single one, I promise I read everything even if I don't respond to it ❤✨

✨Taglist✨

@game-savvy @chaoticfivesworld @mmeatt @avalordream @ymechi @andromeda-gay @naynayaa @undecidingfate @thedevioussmirk @tumb3ld0wn

Yell at me if I missed you!

[costumesexpalined]

First things first, basic materials for basically any cosplay.

No need for sewing machines or even embroidery hoops, they’re pretty new in the grand scheme of things and people made insane stuff without them for millenia after all.

(I actually recommend learning hand sewing FIRST, it lets you learn how to fix your stuff in a pinch and is way easier to get into. It’s slower, sure, but it also lets you make finer, more consistent seams and if you have sensory issues tied to sound it’s FAR less likely to set you off. Plus, it’s calming and frankly impresses the hell out of people at competitions and the like and some groups (like re-enactments) do not count machine made things at all in their competitions and standards.)

All you need to sew clothing is a needle, thread, scissors, a measuring tape, a pencil and sharpener or chalk to mark things in a washable way, fabric and time.

If you aren’t totally confident in being able to track seams or keep them even, straight pins or clips helps hold stuff together. You also want these if you don’t want to transfer a pattern from paper to the fabric with drawn lines, but that’s also not exactly needed since I go off the base shapes and measurements. If you aren’t confident with holding material extremely taught while you work on embroidery or bead work and the like, a good embroidery hoop can be found second hand for pretty cheap and you can usually find a really good one for under $10 usd at a craft store with an embroidery section (with $10 being a MASSIVE one, I recommend getting a 6 inch or less unless your doing something at a standing one, which is overkill most of the time).

I’ll explain how to use the materials later, but everyone has trouble with fabric and I’ve had people balk at the cost before, so here’s where to start (or if your on a tight budget)

- broadcloth: cheap cotton, comes in a whole array of solid colors and a staple of cosplay. Be sure to make certain you don’t make something too tight with this, it isn’t the best at holding up to extreme strain. Typically about $5 usd a yard… full price.

- quilting cotton: slightly more enxpensive and usually patterned in some way broadcloth. If you go to a fabric store they will have TONS of this. Averages about $6-8 usd a yard full price, depending on the brand and store.

- old linens: a cosplay classic. Go to goodwill or Facebook marketplace or a garage sale or something and buy up a bunch of old bed sheets and stuff or some curtains and be ready to get dirty with dye, bleach, and a lot of prayers. Best to aim for solid white, makes it easier, unless you want that specific color/pattern. Upside is that these make bigger pieces easier to make. Think cloaks, super big skirts, “Aladdin” pants, things that have a high depth AND width to the piece you need. Lowers the seam count, at least.

- Muslin: I will have an unhinged rant about historical vs modern muslin later on, but this is a fabric you can get for as little as ¢50 a yard in some cases used for a pattern making method called “draping” that will also be explained at a later date. It’s thick, completely undyed/unbleached, and sturdy enough to take some abuse and doesn’t gray too bad. It’s shit compared to historical muslin, but it does its job as a cheap canvas in a pinch. Be warned: these come on VERY short bolts and often aren’t “double wide” like other fabrics, which can be an issue and lead to TONS of seams.

Again, muslin is used to make patterns usually. Will explain “draping” later but it’s pretty self explanatory based on the name.

[itznarcotic]

Also holy shit I KNEEL to this Soulsborne protagonist

In Pan-Human History, ORT fell on Earth, wiping the dinosaurs, and then a second meteor containing the alien fungi fell. The fungi's MO is to spread its Divine Filaments to empower the local species so they can symbiotically coexist. They form a net of Divine Filaments, so the name is supposed Malla, not Maia. LB6 Moss situation, except we didn't need to wait for a material book to find out. Anyways, the Malla buffed the American continent's jungles and humanity, and some individuals specially empowered by it were worshipped as the Aztec gods.

In the Lostbelt, the Malla meteor arrived first and empowered the dinosaurs instead of the non-yet-existing humans. The Divine Filaments are also binding Pangea together, thus extending its domain to more than just the American continent. Later, Malla predicted ORT's arrival and creates Mictlan to store the dinosaurs safely underground.

ORT falls wiping the surface and is rendered inactive by the crash damage. Meanwhile, in Mictlan, the dinosaurs evolve into deinos, living off of photosynthesis from Malla's artificial underground sun. At the same time, our humanity mankind is starting to appear in Mictlan. Some 40 million years, Malla runs out of sun and deinos go comatose. Humanity prospers in the dark Mictlan and builds their cities (remember how Chichen Itza was resized from a pre-existing city).

20 million years more, now it's been 60 million years since ORT arrived, so he's fully recovered from his crash and ready to wreck havoc. ORT is too hopeless undefeatable for humanity, so all humans sacrificed themselves to make their king, Camazotz, utterly unkillable. And so Camazotz solos ORT, with the only weapon at his disposal being his sheer inability to die. No exact number on how many centuries or millenia he took.

Ultimately, Camazotz rips ORT's heart out and that gets used as Mictlan's new sun. The deinos wake up again because now they have a sun for their photosinthesis. 6 millions years later, Daybit arrived introducing the concept of god, so ORT's heart gets worshipped into Kukulkan.

[loveandlive4eva]

HOW TO SHIFT TO VOID/DR/IMAGINATION (using yoga nidra!)

[ hi guys! I’ve been researching for ongoing shifting attempts I’ve been doing and I found out about a really interesting meditation/yoga method, yoga nidra, that looks like it could help a lot with visualizing our imaginations/4d and shifting to the void/dr! disclaimer- I’m like not at all an expert on this technique. yoga, or desi culture in general, I literally like just started researching it today, what I hope to do is introduce LOA methodology to some of this technique to help manifestors and shifters in their LOA journeys, if I get anything wrong, offend anyone or if theirs something you’d like to enlighten on, please comment, reblog, or send an ask! ♡ anyways let’s get onto the post ~ ]

so, what is yoga nidra?

[ from my (brief) research, yoga nidra is a yoga technique which allows for access to the states between sleep and waking consciousness, which is relevant to manifestors and shifters because this intermediary state allows for the brain to be more susceptible to allow our subconscious to manifest our dream live and wants. Yoga Nidra is an ancient practice vital to the Hindu religion for millenia, but the specific form of yoga nidra I’ll be discussing was established during the 1970s, and I am mostly going off of the teachings of Satyananda Saraswati (this figure is controversial and is tied to accusations of sexual abuse, I in no way am supporting his actions and only want to share the information he provided with my additions, his action are super, super, gross, don’t support him as a person or financially). The following brackets will be profiling the seven steps needed to achieve the yoga nidra state. Also, this method is greatly aided by the assistance of a guided meditation, which can be provided through audio form such as through youtube or spotify (which there are numerous resources) or irl through a yoga instructor or friend, but make sure this environment is safe, and research your yoga gurus. you can lets begin ♡ ]

HOW TO ACHIEVE YOGA NIDRA : STEP 1 - STARFISH / SAVASANA POSITION

[ the first position which is recommended for yoga nidra is to assume the shavasana position, more commonly known as the starfish position in western circles due to having all four limbs spread openly, similarly to the animal. We’ll be further using the effects of this technique during the course of the yoga nidra state. ]

STEP 2 - THINKING WITH INTENT

[ this step might be familiar to shifters and some manifestors, as we’re often instructed to think with intent to achieve your desired manifestations or reality. In this state, we will think with intents to fully relax our mind and body, and later, think with the intention that no matter what, you will achieve your desired state or want, think with the intent that all limiting beliefs have been discarded. ]

STEP 3 - ROTATION OF CONSCIOUSNESS

[ I think this is basically just body scanning, but can also be used as an oppurtunity to position your consciousness into that of the desired person, state, reality etc you want to achieve. Disconnect your body fully from the 3D world at this point, you should only be aware of the 4D world ]

STEP 4 - AWARNESS OF BREATH

[ it’s basically what it sounds like lol, so just do your preferred breathing excercises ]

STEP 5 - FEELINGS AND SENSATIONS

[ this is where you should start to visualize your inner world more vividly, invoking the ability to use your 5 senses in your inner world to further immerse your brain in this experience. I’ve already made a post (that no one read) about how to easily invoke your five senses to shift :) ]

STEP 6 - CREATIVE VISUALIZATIONS

[ this is an extension of the previous step, where you visualize your inner world. in this step, the focus is specifically on the sense of vision in the inner world, where intense mental traning and concentration is used to invision complex imagery. remember, visualizing (and vision in general) is a sequence of succeeding imagery, it’s not that complicated at all, and you’ll become better and better every time you try! ]

STEP 7 - INTENTIONAL THINKING - THE RE-UP

[ This final step invokes once again intentional thinking, but instead of easing you into the dream world, it eases you out, returning the mind to wakefullness. ]

conclusion ~

[ what originally drawn me into this method was that it provided the clearest instruction of how to bring ourselves to the inner world I’ve seen before, and I hope it was able to inspire you also~ you’re going to manifest your desires, it’s literally destiny, remember that, and byeee! ♡ ]

[earlsocksiii]

tekken is such a funny series. like it is at its core an emotional, highly dramatic and personal story of the clash between bloodlines, the centre that holds it together is just amazing. (sometimes it’s written badly. but that’s ok). But then it’s just got a big shell of weirdness and the most insane shit a game series could ever have. I cannot figure out a good metaphor for this

most people’s impressions of tekken is the core, sure, that it’s a serious series of normal-looking guys beating eachother up, but.. it is so weird past the surface

like you got Heihachi Mishima, intimidating bastard with incredible hair falchions, who.. has trained three separate bears in his personal Mishima-style fighting karate. And he names them all ‘bear’ in Japanese or Panda. because she is a panda

Bryan Fury seems like just a normal criminal sociopath guy who is a bastard, but he’s actually just a full cyborg with an entirely artificial body. who is also a bastard sociopath guy who enjoys causing pain

the director of the series Katsuhiro Harada, infamous stubborn as hell guy, has confirmed that having the devil gene, bloodline powers that invoke the name of Devil (devil being both an adjective and a person here) prevents the Mishima bloodline from having male pattern baldness

there is both incredibly accurate and beautiful martial arts animation, of real techniques that looks like it had so much love and care put into it, Hwoarang’s taekwondo, Eddie’s capoeira, Steve’s boxing, Leo/Julia’s baji quan; so much of it is incredible. but they also put in a bunch of not very credible but. pretty cool stuff, and they make that also look so beautiful and perfect, Leroy’s wing chun, Marshall’s jeet kune do, a guy named King with a jaguar mask who does actual pro wrestling on people. just in tekken 7 they added Claudio, a fucking exorcist of a secret millenia old order who does Sirius-style Exorcist Fighting Arts and uses Real Magic. it’s all so satisfying and good

this series makes me both so excited for each narrative turn and also has like 20 different plot threads they created and forgot about (the nature of Asuka’s powers, Kazuya/Paul’s rivalry, Julia’s whole deal about defeating the devil gene, literally all of Leo, Feng and Hwoarang’s backstories in later games) (I guess that part’s because of how many characters there are, not everyone can be focused on and developed even with like a new sentence of development in their bio)

I truly love tekken and it has forever touched my heart. and also the music is real good. yodeling in meadow hill (hidden retreat) tekken 6? kinder gym tekken 7?  dr. bosconovitch theme tekken 3?

man. I can’t wait for tekken 8. I wanna play Leroy so bad.

[ashes-writing-corner]

So yesterday I brought up the idea of writing a dragon rider/fantasy AU and come up with basic ideas/headcanons for it. I'm here this morning to do just that, starting with Simon and his dragon Brightfire because I'm biased, obviously lol

Simon and Brightfire Headcanons

Simon

1. Was (supposedly) abandoned as a baby on the steps of the Dragon's Keep because of a deformity of his skin.

2. He has patches of scales on various parts of his body, including his face which is why he wears the mask in this AU.

3. Lives in Dragon's Keep, serving as guardian to the hatchery, but is every so often commanded to go out and do work for Nova (the dragon queen who raised him), which he does gladly, as it's mostly spying or the VERY rare occasional assassination.

4. Is known as the Dragon Keeper because of his position, as the only human to live in Dragon's Keep. People have also taken to calling him the Ghost of Dragon's Keep, as some folks believe he's not even really alive because of his quiet and somewhat unnerving nature.

5. Was raised by Nova alongside other hatchlings, so he sees the youngest dragons as his siblings. He respects the older dragons, viewing them as uncles, aunts, and cousins.

6. While most respect Simon for his position, others see him as a sort of pariah, someone who rejected his own humanity to live alongside the scaled, fire breathing beasts.

7. Not so secretly admires Princess Lyra, heir to the throne of Athana, who treats Simon like anyone else, and is his best/only human friend at the beginning of the story.

8. Is the last of the group to get a dragon, as he feels he doesn't deserve one and he doesn't feel like they should be used that way. He doesn't mind that Riders exist, he just thinks there's a few ethical issues surrounding it.

9. As the closest to the dragons, he knows the most about them (how they think, how their culture is structured, etc), and he knows their stories and myths. He's remarkably tight lipped about it, unless given permission from Nova to give this information to his fellow Riders.

10. Is chosen by Brightfire due to his bloodline and the parallels between them...

Brightfire

1. After Nova, he's probably the oldest dragon in existence.

2. Was the first dragon to ever be ridden by a human, and together they started the Riders.

3. According to legend, he and his Rider used the last of their power to imprison a great evil that threatened the kingdom, and potentially the world, so everyone at first thinks he's dead.

4. Bright has lived as mostly a wild dragon since his Rider died, losing most of his "human" side and living/thinking more like an animal for the past two millenia.

5. Was also raised by Nova, though he isn't biologically hers. Like Simon, he still feels a sense of loyalty to her.

6. Hasn't made an appearance in two millenia and most people think he's dead, though he often showed up in Simon's dreams carrying a dire warning.

7. While all dragons have a sort of telepathy, Bright can project his thoughts and feelings into others around him, not just his Rider. In a sort of mirror to this, Simon can understand all dragons, regardless of whether or not their Rider is present, while other Riders can only understand their own individual mount.

8. Has a hard time trusting most humans, but is deadly loyal to Simon and, a little later, princess Lyra. He also grows to care deeply for Price, Gaz, and Soap.

9. His fire is white, with streams of gold and silver in it.

10. He technically should be the biggest dragon in existence, after Nova, due to having unlimited space and food, but because of his fractured mind, Bright's growth is paused until he meets and has his first flight with Simon.

And there we have it! I have the others planned out too, if anyone wants to see anyone else! All dragon pictures I include in this series are drawn by Kenny Kwan Brenes (kennykwanarts on Instagram, seriously go show them some love because their dragon art work is just...immaculate!) I don't own the art, I just own ideas for dragon characters and a few human characters. Thank you ^^

[ask-but-beware-the-consequences]

Read this after watching episode 6 of s2, while we wait for season 3

A short fic I came up with just now sry in advance:

[The angels haven't left the bookshop yet, they are discussing the new arch angel position]

Crowley: Why not Raphael? Hm?

Others, concerned.

Crowley: I'm pretty sure he was in the 4 main archangels group. So obviously, he should be one of the followings wouldn't he?

Michael: Well, um… I don't owe an answer to a demon!

Aziraphale: He's the aid of humans. He must be down on Earth to help them. All the time.

Crowley, questioningly raising his eyebrows: … Where exactly?

Aziraphale: Well, it's quite a big planet, so-

Crowley: Where, exactly, did you hear that?

Aziraphale: Oh, well, um. It's true, it's how everybody knows it in Heaven!

Crowley, looking back at Michael, his temper raising by the bit: Youu! Lied! To everyone just to not have problems in the office?! Is that it?! Was my disappearance so outragous that you tried to replace me with a lie?!

Aziraphale: Crowley, what are you-

Crowley: You're the ones, that made my fall be worthless! And to top it off, you're trying to get my only friend- the only being I can ever exist with, to be the next archangel! A principality! Archangels are made! Not, promoted!

Aziraphale's eyes shoot up, sensing something's bad.

Crowley: You know that, no, you think that, if he's up there I can't get in there, but I swear to someone's name, if you try to get rid of him in any nasty way, I will bring Hell back into Heaven!

Aziraphale: Crowley-…

Michael: A threat from a demon that betrayed Hell, how… threatening.

Crowley, bursting into flames: Don't test me or I will kill you right here and now!-

Aziraphale, stepping between them: Crowley, stop! It's alright, I…

Azirpahale turning to the angels: I just need a bit of a time, we'll continue this, later.

Michael: So be it.

The angels leave.

Aziraphale, shaking from shock: So, you… you've been…

Crowley: Yes… sorry I haven't introduced myself before, I just knew, you would start with all that "I'm sorry, I didn't know you were an archangel" bullshit… Angel!

Aziraphale, standing back from being respectful: S-…sorry.

Crowley: This is what I've been trying to tell you! It doesn't matter how far you're up on the hierarchy, it's shit! You can't change anything, you follow orders, and that's it. You only think that you can change things because you're a principality.

Aziraphale: But, that's why! I see things, you possibly, couldn't see! I can make it a better place!

Crowley: Angel, it's a military base! Are you listening to yourself? Nobody has ever been good to you before there! Nor to me, except… you.

Aziraphale: That's why I have hope. Muriel here even-

Crowley: Angel, you won't be on top of the hierarchy. You will be accompanied by other archangels, with the same powers you have. No matter what powers you get, they can still fire you, like they fired Gabriel.

Aziraphale: They did what?

Crowley: In… the files. I haven't mentioned that, yet have I?

Aziraphale, looking awfully sad: But- …

Crowley, giving out a sigh: …Listen angel, I give you, what they will never give you. Free will. You might not have noticed it, but I always had given that to you. So now, I let you decide it for yourself. You can stay here with me, for the rest of our lives, somewhere, idk, maybe another place, in a cottage, southdown… or-

Aziraphale: But we are eternal beings, the rest of our life isn't just a few millenias! Or even less, what if Earh gets destroyed?! And all the stars along with it, that you have created?! I just want you to have a safe place… with me!

Crowley, giving out another but sadder sigh: If… you want to give it a try, I can't stop you, can I? But don't forget, I'm a demon, if I have a plan to save you… you know they will all fail… if I'm only doing this alone.

Aziraphale: And, I'm sure you know… if mine was to fall… I'd like you to catch.

Aziraphale tip-toing, then going outside of the bookshop, leaving the demon Crowley alone, but not for ever.

Crowley: Wat… Fall? Angel?!

He went outside after him but he was already gone.

Crowley, muttering to himself: I… I don't want you to fall… I want you to stay you.

Next

[nayeonline]

ranking EVERY BLACKPINK song

i had so much fun with this omg

Whistle (magnum fucking opus. DID I STUTTER.)

Boombayah (the world stopped.)

Lovesick Girls (highly controversial yet accurate take)

Pretty Savage (teddy took his once a millenia slay pills)

Forever Young (used to hate this song, apparently I hated fun lmao - BP IS THE REVOLUTION)

Playing With Fire (even the antis like this one like come on she's built different)

SOLO (jennie first comeback when)

Bet You Wanna (no cause u don’t like the song LIKE I LIKE THE SONG)

As If It’s Your Last (fan favourite and for a good reason)

Ddu Du Ddu Du (there’s a reason this was so fucking popular)

Shut Down (we don’t appreciate her enough - the slay is MONUMENTAL)

Sour Candy (the final boss of growers)

Stay (trewly i don't think you understand)

Kick it (the girls that get it, get it)

Kill This Love (d4 part two)

Love To Hate Me (wake up, yeah, makeup, maybe like PEOPLE DIED.)

Gone (no one can perform this song like queen rosie performs this song)

On The Ground (illegal to dislike her i don't make the rules)

Hard To Love (wait has this song always been good omg)

MONEY (if any of you lot ask why this is so high… just trust me x)

How You Like That (respectfully no lower because this song had a major moment)

Flower (remember my ranking of the solos literally 6 days ago? Me neither x)

Pink Venom (fun chorus, bit boring verses ngl)

Crazy Over You (frustratingly occasional slays)

Typa Girl (just a little bit pick me but its jennie so i allow it)

Tally (filler but fun filler)

The Happiest Girl (vocal slay but can we go back to having fun pls)

Don’t Know What To Do (monumental slay choreo, boring song x)

Ice Cream (i'm a certified stan of this song but I won't deny it deserves to be here)

LALISA (call me lali salami)

Yeah Yeah Yeah (no comment)

Really (microscopic slay)

You Never Know (cute or whatever)

Hope Not (something fun for the time)

See U Later (lisa carrying with that ‘woulda coulda shoulda didn’t’)

All Eyes On Me (this isn’t you jisoo)

You & Me (keep it in the concerts lmao)

Kiss And Make Up (nobody moved.)

Ready For Love (the hatred i have for this song is unfathomable)

[queen-of-midnights]

Dreamer of Light

Masterlist

Word count: 1.5k

Chapter 6

"Broken"

Everything hurts as I am chained to the wall. Metallic covers everything, millenias worth of torture, pain and dark magic stain the very isle of Hybern.

But that was not the worst of it, as I can hear the Cauldron singing, distortionated voice echoing in the distance, louder than I heard it the first time.

I will have you.

Dreamer of Light.

Angel of Life.

Cuts now are all over my skin as I was held in a different cell than my sisters. Something about me having magic, but I was knocked out before I could hear more.

Everything was cold, so cold. The first hours I screamed and cried, trying to get away until I broke one of my own wrists trying to get my cuffs off. But surprisingly, someone came in to heal me.

I have lost most sense of time, as I hear footsteps against the cold stones, and a dark presence now stood in front of me, a tall slender man with pale skin, slicked back jet black hair and the coldest eyes one could bear. He felt like death, as he opened the cell and stared down sharply at me.

"Hello, you pretty little thing." He smirked as he made a move to come closer, as I tried to move away but the chains could only hold on for so long. Something shone in his eyes as he stared. "So you do have magic. How interesting."

"What do you want, Death?" I spit out, sharp as I could muster, but I was no match for his tall figure.

"I prefer to be called by my own name, weakling. Dagdan." He held only hate and curiosity in his eyes.

"The one I gave fits you better." He chuckled.

"Hah, if my uncle were not so adamant on you joining us, or at least stay alive, I would love to show you all the ways to die, or you would certainly make a good pet." I paled at his words.

"Join you? Why?" I raised an eyebrow intrigued.

"My uncle was curious, never heard of a human with magic such as yours. And, I have to admit that I was curious myself." He now seemed to study me, I felt like a caged creature on display.

"I have nothing. So kill me, and be done with all this bother." He took a step back.

"The King gave his orders. And you might have to rethink of your choices. If we do not convince you to join us, The Cauldron will be delighed to have you. It has been singing ever since you arrived." He stood there, waiting for a reaction, but I gave him nothing.

"I guess I'll see you in hell." At that he smiled.

"Your funeral. Although, I believe that I will try to get the satisfaction to at least throw you into the Cauldron." Just what he wanted.

With no more words, he left the cell. Bastard. Fate will come after him, that is for sure.

But I believe that it was my turn to face fate, as a while later, the male, 'Dagdan', showed up again, together with a female who was the feminine version of him, long slick black hair, pale, with eyes that match.

"It's time, mortal. Your last chance." He got into the cell, the female staying behind and throwing me nasty looks.

"No." It was final, left no room for arguing as he hummed, got closer and released me. I hissed at the burn the cuffs left on my wrists and ankles.

He extended to me his arm to take, surprising me and the other one.

"I will not harm you if you behave, got it?" I only nodded and took it. There was no room to escape. It was pointless. Might as well avoid more scars. My skin was damaged enough from nightmare scares and the marks that the Fae guards left.

"Why are you wasting your time with this weakling? Just kill her and we'll tell the High Lord that it was an accident-" The female snorted, looking annoyed. But Dagdan shut her down quickly.

"Hold it, Brannagh." With that silence followed as I tried to stay on my feet. 'Try' being the key word as my feet had no more strengh left. I fell immediately but the dark prince caught me.

With no more words he scooped me up in his arms and carried me to the halls, and I had no more strength left to protest, my limbs fail me as do my words, my throat burning from all of my desperate screams for help.

Everything was a haze, but my cloudy mind was cleared when we entered a huge room, and when I heard the screams of my sisters, I knew it was over.

But I couldn’t concentrate enough as I was in the same room with the Cauldron, its voice so loud that I found my voice to scream again.

Finally, you are here.

Dreamer of light.

Angel of Life.

"Bring the youngling to me, Nephew." A man interrupted the horrid song of the Cauldron, he looked like the King of Hybern.

"Get your filthy hands off of my baby sister!" Then I saw Feyre, with all of her friends struggling against some invisible restraints, Rhysand holding her back for some reason.

"Uncle. This is Sienna Anastasia Archeron, the human we believe has the ability to shape magic." I could do nothing more than rest. I was tired of everything.

"Hello, little mortal. Has she agreed to it?" His eyes shined with pure evil intent, as if he were carrying out the Devil's orders. Dagdan only shook his head.

"Such a shame. At least you will make a good offering to the Cauldron. Throw her in first, it calls out to her." His interest left as soon as it came, now gesturing dismissevely towards the Cauldron. Which became to roar louder and louder.

I started to struggle as the screams of my family and of the huge monster that awaited all blurred into one, as the darkling shushed me before muttering a 'see you in hell' before throwing me in.

As soon as I hit the midnight water everything went silent.

No more screams, no more agony, as I was dragged deeper and deeper. Until everything was black.

It was such a temptation to give in, let it consume me as it started to hum before tearing down my skin, muscles and bones.

I got you.

I finally got you.

Then something snapped in me. As a small white flame danced around me, stopping behind me in the form of wings. Pure white feathered wings spread, they felt familiar, it was as if something was missing. This. It calls to me and feels like home.

I then decided to fight back. To take it all.

No you did not. I hummed back, spreading the white flame wildly around, trying to cover everything with it.

You never will.

I got you, oh great Cauldron.

What do you wish for? What exactly are you trying to achieve here? Angel of life.

I want everything.

No more pain, no more suffering as I was shaped back into place, with slightly longer limbs, pointed ears, but what differed were that I finally had them, had the wings that I never knew I needed. They were a part of me and have somehow always been as the white flames merged with my skin, leaving tatoos on my arms.

My fire was now everywhere as the Cauldron screamed in agony, pure terror as I tried to shatter it to pieces. And then I felt it.

It's powers were slipping.

So I took as much as I could when I was ripped from the water by the slight tilt of the Cauldron.

Everything felt like a dream. That was until my wing twitched, which confirmed that everything was real. Then I heard them speacking.

"Impossible." One said, full of disbelief.

"No way." The other seemed more shocked.

"She broke the Cauldron." Dagdan spoke as I became aware of everything.

Finally, when Nesta ran to me with Elain clutched in her arms, both drained and fully made as Fae. How much time did my haze last?

Nesta hugged me close to her, and by them I realized that I was crying, wiping off my tears, they weren't clear as they were before. They were similar to liquid gold.

She didn't have to say a word as Morrigan winnowed us away. But I couldn’t find it in myself to calm down.

Rhysand cursed as we arrive, with Feyre running to us and crying. That's when I was finally aware of everything, seeing Cas and Az wounded on the ground.

But then I felt the same white flame light up, and out of instinct I crawled to them and as soon as I touched their wings, they flared up in flames.

Everyone screamed as the white fire died down and their wings returned as new, and they put themselves in front of me.

At first I was confused, but then I realised that everyone got scared and Rhysand nearly covered me in his deadly night, scared that I would hurt his brothers.

"Calm down, Rhys. See? They're good as new."

"Even better."

But then something got my attention.

A silver female came in the room upon hearing their screams, and my instincts were clearer than ever.

Same as me.

She stared at me with shock in her eyes as a single tear slipped down her cheek. Everyone looked stunned as she came closer. She was the embodiment of Death, but not as the dark prince.

"I can not believe it. I have finally found you, Angel of Life."

What in the world was going on?

[broodingnightgoddess]

Queer characters in media: Emil

Emil is a main character and party member featured in NieR Gestalt/Replicant and it's remake NieR Replicant 1.22 along with being a minor character in NieR Automata.

-----------------------------------

Character and game info

Name: Emil

Alias: Weapon No. 7

Gender and sexuality: Gay male (implied in-game to be attracted to the protagonist Nier; confirmed explicitly by game director Yoko Taro who typically wears Emily's head to hide his face)

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐ (4/5)

He's adored by both developers and players, along with being part of the main cast and having a really good character arc. Unfortunately he doesn't get a full mark due to the scenes regarding his sexuality being uncommon, so it ends up being almost a background detail that could have been removed and nothing would have changed.

Brief story (spoilers)

Emil is a child-turned weapon that employs the magical element "maso" for his powers. He was created by the National Weapons Institute to fight against the Legion, monsters set in destroying mankind along with his sister Hanua, also known as Weapon No. 6. However, Hanua went berserk.

Emil, with the power to turn everything he sees to stone, was forced to petrify his own sister to contain her. Emil wears a blindfold and sees his powers as monstruous, burdened by guilt.

Later in the game, after a five-year long timeskip, Emil and Nier manage to fuse Emil with Hanua, pacifying her and turning Emil into a skeleton version of himself, resembling his sister. With that, he gains new magical powers and the ability to see without petrifying others.

At the end of the game, Emil sacrifices himself to save his companions, but the ensuing explosion sends his head flying to a desert, and he rolls away in search of his friends.

A clone of Emil is later seen in NieR Automata, over 7000 years later. It is later revealed that the original Emil slip himself into millions of copies of himself to fend off alien invaders millenia later after the events of the game, however he was unsuccessful.

The original Emil dissappeared long ago, and the other Emils only keep a chard of his memory. The main clone and the others can be fought as secret boss battles, being level 99 and 90, respectively.

Trivia

The main cast of NieR Replicant is formed of rejects from society, Emil in particular is rejected for his body after being transformed, along with another teammate named Kainé, who was outcasted due to being intersex (she'll get her own entry)

Due to not being allowed within the village Nier lives in, Emil and Kainé bonded together over their own experiences as they camped out, with Emil seeing the woman as an elder sister.

----------------------------------------------------

Check out the campfire scene and his bossfight

Thanks for reading and happy Pride month!

Protect this boy

[approximateknowledge]

Unprompted Dune Rant

I'm somewhat unreasonably frustrated by what Brian Herbert did to Dune. It's all somehow canon but not really and does, to my experience, nothing but detract from the original 6 books Frank wrote.

Let me explain: the original books were not perfect, and especially the earlier ones have moments where their age shows pretty painfully. However, throughout all of it, it remains, despite the atypical and sometimes deceptively low-tech seeming societies, a scifi story in the classical sense. Which is to say, it's fundamentally trying to answer philosophical questions. In Dune's case, it's about Power, Fear, and most importantly Systems wether political or ecological. About technology and what that word even means. About the philosophical definition of the Human (especially important in the latter 3 books but pops up from chapter one). About religion in the anthropological sense. About the pitfalls of prediction.

Brian misses all of this and basically treats the carefully crafted millenia and galaxies of setting like it's a mediocre High Fantasy setting with some weird magitech. It's especially blatant in the prequels he made, where he treats the ancestors of later Great Houses as fantasy-style "chosen ones" in an ontological sense, completely ignoring the crucial fact that everything that makes them "special" in the original books is solely a product of Bene Gesserit interference (genetic and memetic).

And I will never forgive him for what he did to the Butlerian Jihad. If you can't write convincing AI, don't make an entire damn prequel series about an AI rebellion that's explicitly left in the realm of myth in-setting. Even GW gets this in 40k. GW, who explicitly stole so many concepts directly from Dune, even they had the common sense to keep the Men of Iron rebellion in their setting (clearly just a copy of the Butlerian Jihad) vague, distant and therefore plausible and open to interpretation. Idiot AI cheapens any setting.

Semi-coherent rant over.

[cheerfulripley]

Every morning, my writing discord has a prompt.or question to promote engagement. This morning's question was really fun so I decided to share my tangent from there.

The question was:

What’s one fact about the universe of [insert fic] that you didn’t get a chance to mention in the fic itself? (x)

And so I want to share this tidbit of behind-the-scenes lore from my destiel fic Contingecy. It's a possession fic and a s4 rewrite, where Cas is a fallen angel in hell who finds Dean and pulls them both early to stop the Apocalypse. But there's a bit of backstop for Cas I didn't get to include in the fic itself that I wanna share here. The discussion is under the cut, and there will be spoilers to Cas backstory.

So, in chapter 6, Cas is talking about how he's spent millennium hiding on earth, helping people and running from Heaven for reasons.

Later on in the fic there's a music lesson scene. Sam is breaking down the meaning of Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody" and explained to both Dean and Cas how the lyrics talk about Freddie Mercury as a bi man. Dean tries to cut him off, thinking that Cas will get smitey if Sam keeps talking about queers. We get to see a very impassioned response from Cas.

If you're a gardener, do you care which of the ants have sex together? No, it's literally beneath you, which is how angels view most human relationships. Cas cares because he loves people and cares for them, even if they are just ants to something so cosmic.

So, Cas is partially correct that Heaven doesn't care, but it's just because they *don't care.*

CW homophobia, murder (temporarily)

Anyways, the bit of lore I wanted to include but didn't was that many millenia ago Cas ran across a lesbian couple whi treated him kindly and helped him. A man in their village hated these women and when they spurned his advances, he led a mob that killed them.

Cas found out and returned to the village, making a point to not hide his righteous fury. He made sure that everyone knew he was an angel from Heaven and those women were protected. He resurrected them, and killed the man instead. He made sure everyone in town understood he was their guardian angel.

In the fic Cas is labeled in lore as the Angel of the Downtrodden, but he's now also considered an angel of queer protection.

Like I said, it never made it into the fic but yeah. Maybe he can tell this story in part 2 (bc there is a part 2 full fleshed put in my mind.

Here's a link to the fic if you want to read more :3

[hopeaterart]

Yes I would, thank you very much.

Okay, so first, bit of backstory...

Back in, like, 2013, I decided to read Harry Potter. The franchise wasn't a complete shitshow back then and I was, like, twelve. I had also watched the movies a while ago. My opinion back then was that the books were good, but the last ones were too slow for me. (Disclaimer: stop consuming Harry Potter content. Trans and Jewish lives are more important than your nostalgia. If you try to start discourse about HP or it's author here, I'm blocking you.)

Anyway, got older, dropped HP, checked out other things, got on Tumblr a few years later for Assassin's Creed, ~5-6 years later now I'm here. The antisemitic wizard game comes out, there's like ten thousand posts about why you shouldn't buy it, more anti-HP stuff comes out, you know the drill, you were here too.

And one of the things that sticks with me is people talking about the ending. Namely, how it upholds the really shitty status quo of the wizarding world.

And I think to myself "Mmm. I can do better with my own hidden society."

Now granted, I'm not gonna claim Harry Potter is the first to do something like a hidden society of people different from normal humans who also hide in plain sight. That was pretty common in late 2000-early 2010 urban fantasy books. But, they are the books who introduced me to the trope.

The most oblivious 'fuck-the-status-quo' thing I can think of is the Hidden City not only becoming unhidden, but Draxum being the one to do it.

The status quo of FHC itself is something really fragile. When a change happens, it stays changed, because change is good. Each arc, big or small, has for objective to bring about changes. So what changes does the Jei Arc bring? Usagi coming to terms with his trauma, Jei being exorcised for good, permanent design change for Usagi (gained a scar), unrest in the Hidden City- both from the citizens and nobility- due to how long it took for the Jei problem to be taken care of, and Draxum coming face to face with how his hatred and bigotry toward humans is bad.

How does Draxum deal with the last thing?

By going against mostly everything he stood for for the past few thousand years by revealing the Hidden City to the world, knowing fully well the difficulties he's about to face due to a at-first-glance impulsive decision. By looking the status quo he's been enforcing for millenias head on and smashing it against the floor.

And that's why I wanted the Hidden City to become unhidden.

[dilemmaontwolegs]

Undying Fidelity - Part 7

Loki Laufeyson x OFC Senya Skuldsdottir

Summary: It is time for Loki and Sen to return to Asgard but it isn’t just two of them on the home trip. Warnings: 18+ only, smut, fingering (both m&f) Word Count: 2279 || Main Masterlist ||

Chapter: 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 , 6 , 7 , 8 - coming soon

Loki laid beside me with a hand lightly tracing the stretch marks that showed just how much our son had grown these past seven months, a sleepy smile gracing his lips. I hadn’t been able to sleep and my eyes were heavy but I kept them open long enough to watch the sun break through the window and bathe Loki in gold. His pale skin was a stark contrast to the black satin sheets and it almost gave him an ethereal glow.

“You look tired, my love.” He murmured as he kissed my forehead and pulled me even closer. “You’re not still worried about him are you? The healers said he is fine.”

“I can’t see him, Lo. I can’t see him in our future.” I whimpered. “That worries me.”

“He is a descendant of the Norns, perhaps his gift is interfering with yours.” Loki said calmly. “Look at his parents, have you met a stronger match? He will be powerful, unrivalled in his sorcery and devilishly handsome.”

I chuckled and lightly slapped his chest but his smile only widened as he got the reaction he was after.

“If it helps, I will happily take your mind off everything.” He said as he teased my skin with his fingertips.

“Later.” I yawned and laced my fingers between his so I could guide him to the place our son was kicking me. “Could you sing for us?”

His chest hummed as his song for me came to life and the words washed over my skin.

“In storm-blackened mountains I wander alone

Across glaciers I travel forth

In the apple orchard the fair maiden stands

And sings, "When will you come home?"

When she sings, she sings, "Come home."

I drifted off to sleep dreaming of mountains and orchards, wishing for my love to come home but I was alone as I walked. I stood at the precipice of a pure blue glacier and looked up at its mighty expanse. I was nothing compared to the block of ice in perspective. This glacier would give life to millions of creatures over the millenia whereas I was just trying to give life to one.

I looked down at my stomach and wondered why I never had a bump in my dreams. Perhaps it was the same reason I couldn’t see his future. I was so deep in my thoughts I didn’t even notice I had a visitor until he spoke.

“You have deviated from the path.”

I spun around to see He Who Remains standing beside me and admiring the glacier, looking no different to the last time we met centuries ago.

“No I haven’t.” I frowned. “He is continually evolving into a better version of himself.”

“He is not supposed to be better, he is supposed to be exactly as he was destined to be and now I have to fix your mistake.”

“It wasn’t a mistake, you are the one who is mistaken.” I argued.

“I write the timeline.”

“And I read it and what I read is open to interpretation.”

He laughed and it echoed around the mountains, bouncing back louder than before. A fissure cracked across the snowy capped peaks and a rumble vibrated the air as an avalanche began to thunder down the steep terrain.

“What happens next is on you.” He said before he disappeared and left me with the wall of white hurtling towards me.

I woke up as the avalanche buried me in its depths and a sheen of sweat covered my forehead while a light snowfall dusted over the room. Loki must have risen at some point as I found myself alone in our bed, grateful he wasn’t there to witness the phenomenon. I tossed the blankets aside and stepped under the waterfall shower in our bathroom. The room disappeared in a cloud of steam and I tried to wash away the lingering feelings that had clung to me from the dream, like a ghost haunting me.

Large hands wrapped around me before sliding up my body and began to massage the tension permeating down my neck and into my shoulders. I moaned as his fingers eased the knots that had formed in my sleep and I dropped my head back against his shoulder when his hands came to rest back on my waist.

“I was hoping to be back before you woke up.” He murmured as he brushed my wet hair away and kissed the sweet spot along my jawline.

“What business stole you from my bed?”

“Nothing important.” He lied.

I pulled away and turned so I could see his eyes.

“Let’s try that again, shall we?”

“I went to my mother.” He admitted. “I wanted to see if she shared your concerns but she assured me our son is growing exactly as he should.”

“Do you think we could call Thor home?” I asked as I leant back into his embrace, running my hands along the defined lines of muscle that decorated his lean frame. “Just in case.”

Loki rolled his eyes but eventually nodded, unable to deny me anything. He had been enjoying his brother's absence while Thor brokered peace and pushed back resistance in the nine realms.

“I’ll have Heimdall send word to him today. Though I’m not sure what help a fertility god is in your state, you are already with child.” He grumbled.

“It's about seeing the seed into fruition, not just planting it.”

“I already agreed, spare me the lecture on how agriculture and parenthood are the same.” He chuckled. “If you were a better gardener I may pay attention but you haven’t had a plant survive longer than a month.”

I tried to be offended but he was right, I tended to lose interest and forget to water them quite quickly but a child was completely different. His smirk grew as he watched my train of thought reach the conclusion he wanted and I closed my mouth against the lecture of how they were the same. Turning my back on him I grabbed the bar of shampoo and began to lather it into my tresses before his fingers took over and my annoyance at him disappeared.

“Is it later yet?” He asked innocently as he rinsed my hair out.

I laced my fingers into his dark damp hair and pressed down so he fell to his knees with eager eyes and licked his lips longingly.

“Better put that tongue to something other than getting you in trouble.”

“With pleasure.”

He grabbed my hips and guided me back against the frigid stone wall before hooking one leg up over his shoulder. A deep moan fell from my parted lips as he grazed his teeth along my inner thigh, followed by his tongue. I tightened my grip in his hair as I tried to pull him closer but he chuckled darkly and splayed his hand as he cast a spell on me. Invisible chains encased my wrists and pulled my arms above my head and I was left at his mercy.

A knock at our door grabbed Loki’s attention for a moment as the palace housekeepers called out but he pressed a finger to his lip and whispered. “Be a good girl and don’t make a sound.”

I lost sight of him before I could ask what he was planning and I had to bite my lip as his tongue rolled over my already needy clit before it dipped between my folds. A quiet whimper escaped and I felt his absence immediately as he pulled back and cocked his eyebrow at the sound. He flicked his hand and my mouth was covered by a gag before he nodded happily to himself and disappeared between my legs once more.

I bit my teeth into the gag as I fought not to scream at the mounting pleasure he was giving me. My leg was trembling on his shoulder and every muscle in my body was coiled tight at my impending release. My head was spinning as I breathed heavily through my nose and just as I felt I would melt into a puddle, he pulled away. A cry of disapproval managed to snake around the gag but he just smirked to himself and rose from the wet floor.

“That’s not fair.” I cried as he pulled the gag from my mouth.

He spun me around so my hands were still chained above me and he pressed his erection into my back as he bit the flesh below my neck. A heady moan filled the air and he pulled my hips back as he ran the head of his cock along my dripping folds.

“I want to feel you when you come on my cock.” He growled in my ear before thrusting his hips to meet mine.

My eyes fluttered shut as he filled me and he pulled my hair back on his fist so I was forced to look at him.

“Eyes. On. Me.” He enunciated with each long thrust.

His pupils were so blown out with lust that there was almost no green left in his eyes. His eyelids were hooded and his eyebrows pinched together as he felt my body tighten around him, the orgasm he had edged me to was finally going to get its release. I gripped the invisible chains in my hands and held tight as I bucked my hips back into his, the sound of our skin slapping filling the air.

“Mmmm, yes.” He moaned as he bit his lip. “Take it all.”

He rolled his hips and I gasped as the head of his cock rode against my g-spot. His satisfied chuckle vibrated through me and he rolled his hip over and over the sweet spot until I could barely hold myself up. Stars exploded across my vision as my pleasure surmounted and I came with a silent scream. My legs trembled and my wetness ran down them but still Loki didn’t stop.

He growled as my body clenched tight around him and he fucked me through it all. There was no time to come down from my high and I was lost to all feeling except where our skin met. A deep pulsing settled low in my hips and built quickly until it exploded and drenched Loki’s thighs.

“That’s a good girl.” He praised me as he watched me gush around him.

He held his own release back until I was a quivering mess and sagged against the chains, grateful I had them to take my weight since my legs couldn’t hold me any longer. A guttural moan rolled from his chest as his rhythm missed a beat and he pulled out, stroking his stiff length and pumped his hot spurts all over my back. My head rested against the cold stone wall as I tried to regain my breath and I felt him place a gentle kiss against my temple before the shower flowed over us once more.

“I do just love seeing you coated with my cum.” He said as he watched his viscous liquid wash down my back.

“That’s because it screams ‘Loki was here.’”

“And here.” He said, teasing my still quaking core with a finger. “And here.”

He popped his finger in my mouth and hummed with appreciation as I sucked the digit and licked it clean. He pulled it from my mouth with a pop and caught me as he removed the chains and my legs gave way. Carrying me back to our bed, he cast his magic over our skin and I was dry when he placed me into the clean silken sheets the maids had changed.

“Try to get some more sleep.” He said as he caressed my cheekbone and kissed me sweetly. “I’ll go send word to Thor.”

I nodded drowsily as he tucked the blankets around me and I fell into a dreamless sleep before he had even left the room. This was the deep sleep that had been elusive to me since I felt the quickening and even Frigga’s herbal teas couldn’t give me the rest I so desperately needed. It all faded to black and I welcomed the darkness with open arms while winds whispered around me.

“When she sings, she sings, "Come home."

“When she sings, she sings, "Come home."

[dimonds456]

*sees your tags about being salty about suf spinel*

YOU CAN'T JUST SAY THAT AND NOT SHARE YOUR SALT /LH

Okay, but I'm warning you, you asked for it.

LONG POST WARNING.

LIKE A REALLY, REALLY LONG POST WARNING.

Dimonds456 Presents: How They Did My Baby Dirty: An SUTM and SUF Analysis on Steven and Spinel (Told by a Progressively More and More Angry Narrator)

THE CONTEXT: There was a post talking about how you think a character will fix everything, but then they wind up making it works. My tags were "#*looks at suf spinel* #I am still salty about that like the bitch I am fghdjskgfa"

Grab some water, guys.

Let's start by talking about Steven for a moment. In the original show, when we were following him as a 12-14-year-old, we watched as he built up trauma and then learned how to hide it expertly well, to the point that most of the audience didn't even realize he was struggling.

You can actually pinpoint the seconds he makes those decisions, too. The best example is in "The Test," when he's storming up to the gems. He's pissed. His fists are clenched, he's got that anime eye shadow overlay on his face, he's frowning, all that. the Crystal Gems are clapping for him and lying to his face, and he KNOWS they are because he overheard them talking about how it was "impossible for him to fail" that test (- Garnet).

And yet... he also overheard them saying that they're just trying their best. They don't know what he needs. They never really have. No one is sure. So, Steven realizes that by picking a fight, he would just be making it worse for them because they would know they messed up, and nothing gets solved, and everyone gets more depressed and Amethyst and Pearl go back to fighting each other and- well, you get the picture. He doesn't have a full understanding of what's going on, so his kid brain went "so I can either be angry at them and cause problems, or I can tell them I did a good job to make them happy."

"I can lie to make them happy."

He storms down there angry, still mulling this decision over. He drops to the floor, frowning and pissed, and says "I can't believe you guys." He is so close to yelling at them, and yet, when he looks up at them...

"That was so... INSANE!"

You never would have been able to tell. It was right there. That moment. And then he never stops. For the ENTIRE REST of the series, he NEVER STOPS. He puts the Crystal Gems above himself every time. Think Rose's Scabbard, The Message, The Return/Jailbreak. The Cluster. Peridot. Dealing with Jasper. The zoo arc (ESPECIALLY the zoo arc). Aquamarine. Then pretty much the entirety of Season 5.

(NOTE: I went back and rewatched that scene for the screenshot. There is a blink-and-you'll-miss-it lip tremble in there too! D,: )

He lives for the people around him, and not for himself. Almost never for himself.

Put a pin in that.

Now, let's look at his maturity. People thought that was just him being mature, right? That he grew up. No. That was not it at all. He was learning from his own behaviors as well as the people around him, and building up this idea that he had to "fight to be everything that everyone wants [him] to be when [he's] grown" (- Steven, the extended intro).

Yes, he matured, but not because of that. He started making various decisions to benefit the group that oftentimes he wasn't fully comfortable with, but something he believed would be better for everyone.

Put a pin in that.

Then, later in Future, we see it all manifest. He is selfless to a fault, to the point that he can't think of himself in a positive light in the sense that he's good. We see it a couple of times, but especially in "Prickly Pair," when he vents to Cactus Steven about everything that happened. He feels useless, which is taking a toll on his mental health.

"Why do I need to be needed?" He needs to be needed because that's everything he was as a kid. His entire IDENTITY rests on his ability to help other people, no matter what happens to him. He literally sacrificed himself for them countless times (the big one of course being the Aquamarine incident), and now as a teenager, his whole sense of self is wrapped up in this need to get up and do something to make the world better.

And when he can't make the world better, his world falls apart.

Put a pin in that.

Now, let's talk about Spinel, the moment we've all been waiting for.

Spinel, as a gem, was made specifically to be a friend. That is her niche, and her purpose. Her reason for existing. At first, she and Pink Diamond got along very well, as shown in the flashbacks right before Drift Away plays (I headcanon she has illusion powers and was literally projecting her trauma, but that's a completely different post).

She and Pink vibed together for who knows how long, until one day, Pink started to not like being around Spinel anymore, finding her annoying and childish. We don't know what really caused the switch, just that it did happen (but of course, I have headcanons for that, too). Spinel never realized until it was FAR too late.

Steven actually describes his younger self as annoying at one point during the Diamond Days arc, when he decides to throw the ball, so I'm legally allowed to make this comparison.

Steven and Spinel were the SAME. They were both young and dumb, and something that at least a few people found annoying. People put up with their BS though, since they cared about them. But, while Steven realized this and matured because of it (or bottled up his emotions, to each their own), Spinel never did. She never matured. She was never given a chance.

In the movie, we saw her as a child, and watched as she played with Pink and never tried to be or do anything else, to the point that Pink Diamond thought to realize she might be struggling (and maybe Spinel didn't, either!).

She lives for the people around him, and not for herself. Almost never for herself.

And when she can't be friends with this one person, her world falls apart.

Sound familiar? It should. I literally pulled from things I said earlier lol.

Spinel and Steven are mirror reflections of each other. Reset!Spinel is 14-year-old Steven, completely devoting her entire self to one idea. Steven's was helping others no matter what, Spinel's was serving Pink no matter what. Spinel is like a combination of 14 and 12-year-old Steven in this sense, honestly. Goofy, without a care in the world, except one thing: the people around her. She would do anything for Pink, just as Steven would do anything for his family.

Now, Pink Diamond left Spinel. We all know this story. She left Spins there in the garden for 6,000 years because she grew more mature and started a rebellion, effectively forgetting about this one gem she kinda stopped caring about standing there.

Personally, I don't think Pink had any malicious or even intentional intent in that, but this ain't about her. This is about how Spinel continued to sacrifice herself for Pink, even when Pink didn't need her to anymore. She wanted to please Pink 24/7, all day every day, to the point she self-sacrificed and stood perfectly still for her for millenia.

Now, back to Steven. The gems don't need him anymore in Future, right? They've all grown up and matured and headed off towards their own futures, effectively stranding him alone in terms of self-identity and self-worth. But he stays there, ready to assist at the drop of a hat, or- in Future's case- the call of a phone.

Episode 6 anyone? The one everyone says shouldn't be in Future? That it should have been cut to allow more focus on Steven himself? The fusion episode? YEAH. THAT. He is running himself RAGGED to try and help others, to give himself a purpose. He is self-sacrificing. (He's a professional, don't worry. /j)

Steven metaphorically planted his feet down and decided that he was going to devote himself to the people around him.

Spinel's feet were literally tied down soon after she made that very same decision.

Okay, enough with the backstory. Time for the salt.

In Future, Steven is at his lowest low. He is running to the Diamonds for help, to see if there is SOMETHING they can do to help him. And we first see Spinel.

Spinel has been through the ringer on a lot of the same mental problems Steven himself is facing. She self-isolated, watched as everyone grew up and left her, and then began to lash out because of it. She understands what he's going through. We even see her concerned as Steven starts to tell her why he's there.

Spinel takes him from Diamond to Diamond, until he's running out of White's room in a blind panic. Spinel is able to catch up with him, and Steven realizes the same. SHE GETS IT. He turns around and says "Hey, you used to have vengeful thoughts!"

Spinel replies "Ohhhhh yeah, but I don't have 'em anymore."

"How did you make them stop?"

She then goes on to sing Change to him, effectively cutting that conversation short.

On paper, that sounds very in-character for her. She's goofy! And that is what worked for her! But the problem is that they had to dumb her down in order to make that character decision work. In the movie, she was shown to be observant and able to put two and two together, even if she often jumps to conclusions (see her being the one to figure out that the gems needed to remember their "pieces," as she remembers the Garden, her re-realizing what Pink did, and her meltdown later when she reactivates the injector).

Spinel is smart. It should have been in character for her to realize that Steven was panicking just as she had been, and needed to be talked to gently. But no. Instead, she starts belting out Change, which given Steven's situation, would not work for him.

At the very least, she would have started doing little tricks or started trying to get him to join a game, which would have taken his mind off of it (to her anyways, that wouldn't have worked either), which then could have prompted further discussion.

Then, once they finally start talking, Spinel could have been able to share some legitimate advise. She was hurt and lashed out. What worked for her was opening up to others and letting them in, learning to trust again (which Steven also has problems with- he can't trust that the Gems won't break down the second he turns his back. Trust does NOT equal love, there is no doubt he loves them to no end), and allowing other people in.

That is what Steven needed, too. He needed to let his guard down and just talk to someone. Sure, Spinel was not going to be a fix-all, but she could have at least offered some insight on what to do.

She UNDERSTANDS him. They are a reflection of each other.

But instead of offering help, Spinel made it worse. She was dumbed down to allow the rest of Future to happen, to make Steven feel even worse. Because- and here's the kicker- because the one person who MIGHT understand him doesn't, that means there's no hope for him.

At least, that's how he sees it. And so, the denial- and "Everything's Fine"- begins.

Here's the thing, though; they DIDN'T NEED to make that decision. If the Crew wanted to have Spinel not understand Steven, then draw the line of her being a Gem from Era 1, used to the Diamonds shattering people.

Steven has killed Jasper and revived her at this point, so maybe Spinel offers that at least he's trying to get better, just like the other Diamonds! See, they're doing so great now! And then that makes him feel worse since he IS trying to do better, but is only failing, while the Diamonds- who were MADE to be nasty dictators- are doing better than him.

The Diamonds shattered a lot of people, and they're doing better than Steven, who has only shattered one person, and not even on purpose. How horrible is that?

Then boom. THERE'S your angst, with a much smarter, more helpful Spinel.

Look, I knew going in that Spinel wasn't going to be able to help. The finale had to happen somehow, and we hadn't seen Wormy Boi yet. I have always been a storng believer of the corrupted Steven theory, so I knew it was bound to happen. But I was hoping that Spinel would at least try. But she really didn't. She just brushed him off, offering really loose advise that didn't even fit his situation and thinking that would be enough.

No. It's not.

I can see where the Crew was coming from. I still love that episode, and I love seeing Spins in it (until that exact moment). This is probably the only thing in SU that genuinely gets me mad. Or, well, maybe not mad, but definitely annoyed and- you guessed it- salty.

I have an unfinished fic where I kinda delve into Spinel's head for that episode called "A New Start". If you really want my thoughts on where Spinel's head was at, there's a bit in there that really explains it. In the fic, Steven decides to rejuvenate himself and brings Spinel along with him, and that's all the context you need for this.

I cannot explain that moment in the climax of the episode, though. Maybe she thought it would make him feel better, or that maybe he really did just need to open his eyes and see the error of his ways (which doesn't make sense, he KNOWS what he did). Maybe she thought that being silly would help somehow.

But you'd think she'd learn from her time with Pink as she grew more annoyed with her, but apparently not. Or maybe she would realize for a second that being loud and annoying was bad. Or maybe she doesn't learn.

Either way, it- and she- was dumb. And they did my baby dirty.

*drops mic and walks away*