#And when I do talk it out you just fucking disappear on me and deadass idk if I’m

[meejijis]

I can’t do friendships if there’s no communication

[weebsinstash]

When I say with my entire being in my heart of hearts that I know with certainty that this-this-this THING right here would do the absolute most unbelievable petty gross obsessive dahmer level shit to you

He's petty he's evil he's got a childlike fascination for seeing what breaks people down and I hate him I hate him I hate him but ALSO what that dick do tho? 🤔

Mahito is the yandere over here doing shit like imprisoning you for his own selfishness and perhaps genuine affection but making you live in absolute deplorable conditions because He's Not Fucking Human And He Doesn't Even Know How To Feed You. He locks you away and disappears for an entire day and comes back with like a single can of wet dog food that he watches you eat from a squatting position like 5 inches away looking at you like Harley Quinn and the egg sandwich. Motherfucker would take all your clothes because he wants to see more of "the natural shape of you" and then doesn't understand why you start shivering. Or he deliberately keeps you like that because he wants to see how long it takes you to crack and beg him for help. He wants to see the depths of your pride as you refuse to grovel, curious of the lengths you'll go, the limits of your body against the chill

This depraved fuck will do dehumanizing little emotional experiments on you where he does shit just because he wants to see how you think and feel and what you'll do and I mean like he'll do SOME REAL SHIT. I'm talking maybe he's stalking you and you can't fight or use cursed techniques and you think he's just like, a human shaped spirit or something who's just a trickster, he's not being violent or getting you alone or anything yet, and then you come home to your apartment one day and he's literally disemboweled your cat on your coffee table and he's playing with pieces of it and says you were giving it more attention than him and sits there pouting as you scream and even tries to like touch you or hold your hand or hug you with. The fucking blood covered hands. like he would be so fucked up on purpose, "awww do you need me to hold you? You're so sensitive but i dont mind :3"

This man out here like "wdym you want me to stay away from you, all I did was kill your cat kill your mom kill your neighbor kill your best friend kill your boss' cousins' landlords' newborn baby BUT WAS THAT REALLY SO BAD 🥺" and does something infinitely worse to scare/coerce you into tolerating his presence

I'm not really uh into body horror or gore but as a side detail I feel like. Uh. There's like a legitimate risk of him actually unintentionally REALLY hurting you and has to use his powers to heal you. Like the one good thing he does is if he were to have you on death's door or like horribly injured he could just. Fix it. He twists a limb in a way he doesn't know it's not supposed to go and breaks it and then puts you back together like a broken toy while ooo'ing and aaa'ing at the way your skin stretches over the grotesque misalignment. Dare I say the horror of "him putting things that are way too big or weirdly shaped in you" also yeah he's one of the things he's putting in you and he's got a really gross like fascination with learning all about that stuff

He's really living just to see how many different ways he can make you cry and how many different emotions he can get you to display, just absolutely dedicated to terrorizing you while also chasing his own internal weird repressed desire for his own sort of belonging. You could be sitting there sobbing and he's either borderline getting off on it or he's standing there MAKING FUN OF YOUR CRIES like deadass even fake crying back to you

And the worst part is he'll do all this fucking shit to you and then the night comes and he'll still be over here like "and you'll let me cuddle you while you sleep right? 👉👈" and he'll be doing that Every. Single. Night. And what are you gonna do, try and kill yourself? Have fun risking accidentally making yourself a Curse and being stuck with him basically FOREVER

[honeycrispappletree]

ivy // hajime iwaizumi ♫⋆｡♪ ₊˚♬ ﾟ.

masterlist

part 2: wiseman

by: frank ocean

“Can I get a whiskey sour?”

       After the set, her band mates all scattered around the venue. She sighed as she leaned against the bar, waiting for her drink. She turns to look over at Iwaizumi, who is shooting pool with that same laser focus he has when he plays volleyball. Biting the inside of her cheek, she thinks back to the conversation they had earlier, unaware that he cared that much. A guilty pang shot inside her chest. Why did she feel so bad? She turns back and downs her drink faster than usual. She shuts her eyes and grimaces at the sour taste.

“Hey, you’re yn ln right?”

Her eyes shoot open in embarrassment as she sees the person that has suddenly appeared next to her.

“ Jesus christ”, she mutters as she turns to face him, “Sorry, yeah that’s me...who are you?”

He chuckles lightly at her bluntness , “ Didn’t mean to surprise you. I’m Osamu Miya, it’s really great to meet you. Cool set by the way.”

“Thanks, Likewise”, she gives him a cautious smile. This isn't the first guy that's come up to her with seemingly good intentions.

“I do have a motive for coming to talk to you,” he begins. “ I work for a record label downtown, Twin Style Records.”

Everything that was whirling around in her head freezes. “A label?” She questions, like she didn’t hear him the first time.

“Yeah, it’s me and my brother. We are on the upstart still, but we’ve been looking for local talent. We saw a video of one of your guys shows and we’ve been really wanting to get in touch with you.”

Her face is plastered with a genuine smile now, “Are you deadass? Fuck, I mean serious.” She mentally curses herself. “Sorry, I’m horrible.”

“Don’t worry about it,” He laughs, with a certain glint in his eyes she can’t seem to place. “ Here’s my business card, call me whenever. We can talk more about it”. He hands her a small card with his label information, along with  his own.

“Seriously, thank you so much.” She tells him, still looking down at the card. She runs her fingers over the lettering.

“Anytime, I’ll see you around, yn”, he gives her a 'see you later' look and disappears into the crowd.

She watches him leave, and she ignores the fact that her heart almost flutters. 

From across the room, Iwaizumi tightens his grip on his pool stick and shoots the ball just a tad harder than before.

more!

yn AND kuroo have a teensy little smoking problem

iwaizumi refuses to live in a world where yn doesn't get her dream of being a successful artist

osamu thinks twin style is the corniest name ever but atsumu printed 700 hundred business cards before he could object

lev is so nervous around kageyama he thinks he is really cool and scary, kageyama likes hanging out with lev because it boosts his ego

a/n: ok we r getting somwhereeeeeeeee! canva is actually my best friend. I got so lazy w the business card AND I meant to put twin style in the text not miya

also what is grammar genuinely

[sleepingdayaway]

Player has the Fierce Deity Mask

So uh this is an old writing I found in my docs and I decided to post it since I probably won't continue this. I did this for fun and for a discord server I'm in, but if you decide to read this then thanks!

Characters: Fierce Deity

Short Summary: What if player interacted with the Fierce Deity Mask first and refuses to give it back.

Waking up in the middle of the woods with a weird ass mask in their hands was definitely not on [Name]'s list of being woken up to, especially since there was a bunch of screeching noises around them.

When finally coming to the realization that they are in fact not home they quickly sat up and backed away from these weird pig monsters, although they look oddly familiar. That's when they noticed a mask that fell onto their lap, and lifted it up to see it properly. It's a perfect replica of the Fierce Deity mask from Majora's Mask, a game they used to play a lot, when they had the time.

Their eyes widened before looking back at the monsters and at which they realized that they are in fact, bokoblins from the Breath of the Wild game version, but the strangest thing is that they refused to get any closer to them. The bokoblins were screaming and clawing at them as if trying to reach them, but they couldn't, one even went as far as to throw a rock at them. It was able to hit them in the arm.

"Well? Are you not going to deal with them?" Spoke a voice from nearby, it sounded gruff as if it hadn't spoken in a while.

"What in the fuck? God???" 

They replied as they looked up in the sky with confusion on their face; the mask still in their hands. A chuckle was heard before the voice spoke again, "My my, tell me little one, are you able to hear me?"

[Name] looked down at the Fierce Deity mask and held it close to their face examining it, "Wait a damn minute, are you talking? Or am I hearing voices again."

A laugh was heard which caused them to turn red from embarrassment, "You are quite amusing, little one."

A breathy laugh came from [Name], "I will take that as a compliment, but uh I don't actually have anything to get rid of those nasty ass pigs since I deadass just woke up here with just you." It seems that the bokoblins could understand them since two more rocks were thrown at them, as they let out a scream before dodging them.

It was silent for a moment before the mask spoke again, "I will make a deal with you, I will lend you my power to deal with those pests as I said before."

[Name] held the mask closer to them staring for a moment before responding, "I swear, if I die because of a mask I'm going to cry."

They got up from the ground before looking back down at the mask. They aren't sure if they took any strong drugs before going to bed, or if this was one hella vivid dream they're having. Reluctantly they placed it onto their face, and they stood there for a moment before their vision turned white, but they could've sworn just before they blacked out they heard it speak again.

"Yes, I truly do hope you'll live after this, little one."

[Name] woke up again abruptly, they were breathing heavily as if they've been running for a while, before looking around at their surroundings; in the place where the bokoblins once were, there are now piles of random items those monsters dropped and disappearing purple smoke. In their [dominant hand] holds the Fierce Deity mask in all its glory as they use their other hand to drag it across their face while exhaling deeply to calm their breathing. "Holy shit, I don't remember what the fuck happened once I put it one, but damn am I tired."

"It appears that you survived, congratulations, dear, " the mask spoke and it sounded like it was in fact happy and surprised that they lived.

[Name] stared at it with a smile on their face, "Keep complimenting me and I just might get attached to you, but uh after that don't you think it's fair that we introduce each other?"

"Hmmm… yes, I do believe so. I am the Fierce Deity, I come from the land of Termina, and, currently, I take the form of the mask you hold in your hand."

That earned a huge grin from them, "Nice to meet you, Fierce Deity, I'm [Name] and I am not from here, actually…how did I get here?" They tried to remember the events that happened before being in the forest.

 The images of a dark shadow lingering in the corner of their room, and red eyes appearing from it before lunging at them. A weird colored thing also showed up and then them and the weird red eyed shadow falling into it.

Fierce Deity spoke up, "I see, so it was that damn shadow creature who brought you here. I believe it is beneficial if I stay with you, so you will not perish. I also may be able to lead you to a group of adventurers; who are also in the same difficult situation as you." He said soothingly since he knew that you probably won't enjoy being with a person who would antagonize you in a world you are not familiar with.

 "Yeah? I appreciate that very much, Fierce Deity. Well I agree to those terms, I'll gladly have you with me as we find those guys you-" they were cut off by the sounds of multiple footsteps being rushed towards them. A chuckle could be heard from him, "It appears we haven't even needed to search for them at all. They have found you."

It seems that he was right as a tall man rushed forward, and stared them down with one eye, a couple of other guys also behind him staring at them as they caught their breaths.

The oldest and tallest one of the group stepped closer towards you with one of his hands reaching out, "I am sorry for asking this suddenly, but may I please have that mask back?"

[Name] stared at the group in shock as they took a step back and held the Fierce Deity closer to them, "Fuck no, he's mine-"

[hoshigray]

Love your thoughts about Sukuna being a dad 😔🫶🏻 I just see him in all these situations pleaseee he’s so silly 😭 wanna be his baby momma so bad it actually hurts 😿💔

HEHEHEHEHEEE TYYYY idk sukuna is such an interesting character to me who easily sticks out like a thumb bc of his brutality, morality, and way of life/thinking, so ofc something as dear and wholesome like fatherhood is such a hilarious thing to imagine with him 😭😭😭😭 he's so fucking silly, like I can see uraume being like the nanny for the baby and when they leave to do their own thing, Kuna is calling them immediately like "so how are they sleeping, what made them cry bc I don't want that shit, do I have to give them a bath or should i have the mother do it, what's the schedule like, please tell me they can sleep the entire night" LIKE BROO IF YOU DON'T GO HANG WITH THAT TINY BABY 💀💀💀

PFFFFFT bye not you wanting to be his baby mama, but you're so valid, tho 😔😔 like being able to snatch him and have him put a ring on you is one thing; having a whole ass baby with him is another !!!! Omg you teaching him on how to take care of the babe bc he deadass doesn't know bc he never thought he'd be in this situation 🤧🤧🤧🤧🤧 I'm talking like you making him feed the baby their formula and he begrudgingly does so. He's irritated at first but it slowly disappears as he watches the little one feed on the bottle, and you're looking at the entire thing with a smileeee AHHHHHHBS STOP THAT'S ACTUALLY SO CUTE WAIT—

[death-and-other-myths]

Blue Lily, Lily Blue Deadass Book Review

By Maggie Stievfater

This is an unhinged book review/recap of Blue Lily, Lily Blue and shits about to get WIERD AS HELL for Blue and her 4 private school dude friends. AUGH!!

*SPOILERS AHEAD*

This book opens with Adam and Persephone standing on a mountain in the billowing wind doing cool psychic shit, like being able to turn and stand on the leyline and know exactly where it is. She asks Adam what he sees, he closes his eyes. She has to keep reminding him to look outside, not inside. Inside are painful memories and present anxieties. He thinks of the shattered glass things on Gansey’s mansion floor. But when he focuses, he sees 3 sleeping things that need to be woken up. Persephone sees them too, but says no.. it’s 2. One of them shouldn’t be woken up. 

So it’s been a month since Maura disappeared, leaving only a cryptic note. “Glendower is underground and so am I.” — Blue is being strong, but she can’t help but feel a little abandoned. Like we all know Maura went down there looking for Artemis. 

Luckily, we check in on Maura and she’s fine. Time doesn’t exist in the cave. So to her it feels like it’s been a few minutes but it’s really been a month. 

In the meantime, Blue and the boys have been going to hang out at Cabeswater every day. It’s fall, but when they’re there, they wish for it to be summer, so the forest makes it summer. YOU HAVE TO BE SO CAREFUL what you think in this stupid forest. It does nice things like makes the fish change colors, but if you think something like “I could just crawl out of my skin” you will literally be skinned lol. Literal-ass forest. 

There is this really beautiful part where Blue tests out the magic. She thinks of blue lilies and it starts raining blue petals. A petal lands on Gansey’s lips. He sits up and is like “Okay. It’s time.” 

Oh, Noah is there by the way. Hanging out with Matthew who is there visiting Aurora Lynch, who lives in the forest. She’s sweet beyond words. Literally a dream girl. If she leaves Cabeswater, she’ll fall back into a coma. Anyway, Noah and Matthew sit in the car to keep time. Because time moves strangely in Cabeswater.

They enter the cave and tie themselves together on a safety line. Ronan in the back, then Blue, then Adam, all led by our fearless leader, Gansey. Gansey orders Ronan to sing a song, so they can mark time (all of their watches have stopped) — He whistles Irish tunes as they walk. He starts by singing the Murder Squash song, which everyone yells at him about.

Things are going great until Gansey vanishes. Adam is yanked to the ground and manages to hold himself. Ronan grabs Blue tightly. Gansey fell down a FUCKING cave hole and for several terrifying moments, he’s not replying to them. With Adam as a counterweight (poor baby laying on the ground lol) Blue is able to peek over the hole and talk to Gansey — who is… UNDERSTANDABLY having a panic attack as he is free hanging over darkness. 

Again. We’re so used to confident, fearless-leader Gansey, it is fascinating to see him terrified. And this scene is terrifying. 

“There is something on my skin and it is reminding me of …” He trailed off. 

“Water,” Blue suggested. “Or mud. It’s everywhere.”

There was nothing but the sound of his breathing, jagged and afraid. 

Everybody realizes all at once that if they think of hornets, the magic is going to manifest as hornets. Don’t do it. Don’t do it. Then they hear the sound of wings. And thousands of moving things. Turns out it’s hundreds of RAVENS that swarm out of the cave to more ghostly chanting “Make way for the Raven King”. Gansey’s like… okay I’m done being in the pit. I’m coming up now. 

The next day, Adam tries to drive into a national forest to do Cabeswater business. It sends him visions and it’s up to him to figure out what they mean. Tarot cards help. He even lined his sink with tin foil and scryed about it! I love the thought of Adam doing psychic shit. Poor baby though… he’s kind of feeling lonely. He sorted out his anger and that’s doing much better. He even thinks of how scared Gansey sounded in the pit. Like too scared to even pull himself up at first. It reminds him of how he stayed with his abusive father. Fear does strange things to us.

Later, the gang (sans Noah) is crammed in the Camaro on their way to pick up Gansey’s British friend Mallory. They’re speculating as to how to explore that pit some more. Adam is passed out against the window from being magical and doing his 3 jobs probably. Ronan is looking out the window. So we get this ADORABLE SCENE FROM GANSEY AND BLUE.

In the rearview mirror, he caught Blue’s eyes by accident. Strangely enough, he saw his own thoughts reflected in her face: excitement and consternation. Casually, out of view of Ronan, making sure Adam was still sleeping, Gansey dangled his hand between the driver’s seat and the door. Palm up, fingers stretched back to Blue. This was not allowed. He knew it was not allowed, by rules he himself had set. He would not permit himself to play favorites between Adam and Ronan; he and Blue couldn’t play favorites in this way, either. She would not see the gesture, anyway. She would ignore it if she did. His heart hummed. Blue touched his fingertips. Just this — He pinched her fingers lightly, just for a moment, and then he withdrew his hand and put it back on the wheel. His chest felt warm. This was not allowed.

Oh god oh god they like each other so much. He’s supposed to die. She can’t kiss him. Oh god.

They pick up Malory and his 30 suitcases and his dog that has anxiety and cram back in the car. Malory talks about this ancient Glendower tapestry he found under his BARN on a leyline in the UK. And he shows them a photo of it. It has 3 women with red hands on it, and they all have Blue’s face. The camera gets passed around the car and everyone agrees, that’s Blue.

Later that night Blue is ambling about the house. She talks to Persephone about how much she misses her Mom and the consensus is “Maura knows what she’s doing. If she wanted help, she’d ask for it.” — In a funk, Blue calls Gansey. Just to hear his voice. They do that a lot. They have a super brief exchange, a little joke, where she says she dialed the wrong number. And she says she might do it again. He says she shouldn’t, but he hopes she does. 

Adam and Gansey take Malory out to see the leyline. Not Cabeswater, but around the mountains of Virginia trying to find another way into that cave. Adam and Gansey have a sweet moment were Adam tells him “I’m glad we’re not fighting any more.” And Gansey tries not to overdo it with how relieved and happy he is. Then Adam goes on to say “Also, sorry about the whole Blue thing. I realize now how crazy I was to try to date her now that she’s one of us. I mean that would be weird right? Like what was I thinking?” And Gansey’s like “HAHA YEAH HAH WEIRD YEP.”

Blue is in school getting ready to talk to the guidance counselor when Noah shows up! I love this line. He’s so cute.

“I think I miss this part,” he said. “The beginning. This is the beginning, right?” 

“First day,” Blue replied. 

“Oh, yeah.” Noah leaned back and inhaled. “Oh, wait, no, it’s the other one. I forgot. I actually hate this part.”

Well the meeting goes poorly and not just because the guidance counselor is a condescending bitch who basically tells Blue she’s not going to be able to afford getting into any good schools. Things go south when Noah becomes a ghost tornado, throws paper everywhere, then dissapears. 

Blue immediately goes to the factory to look for him, but he’s not there. She peeks in Ronan’s room and sees that freaky mask from the last book. The one Calla said to destroy. It has tire tracks on it. That’s when Gansey and Malory get home. Gansey is so happy to see her there, it’s silly. She accompanies him into the kitchen slash bathroom slash laundry room and they have a sweet moment where she’s trying to act okay when she’s not, and Gansey says “We’ll find her.” And they stand really, heartbreakingly close to one another. 

When they come back into the main room, Malory is like “One of your friends is hiding under the pool table.” (Cool that he can see Noah!) and Blue and Gansey try to talk him into coming out. But he’s crying and REALLY upset. Says he’s just tired of decaying and insists they have no idea how this feels. He starts up another ghost tornado, pulling so much energy off Blue she’s feeling lightheaded. But her mom trained her for moments like this. She knows how to visualize her energy and cut it off. So she pulls the plug on Noah’s energy source before he can hurt her or destroy more things. He’s super sad poor baby and just fades away after that. And Blue feels a little fuzzy when Gansey tells her that was impressive.

That night, a well-dressed douchebag comes to the psychic house. Things are going normally until he shuffles the cards, and pulls a three of swords out of it (the heartbreak card) and is like “So ladies, how do I make this happen?” And you don’t fuck with the cards, so there’s instantly something threatening about him. He asks where the third lady is. The one that looks like Blue. And they’re just like GET OUT. So he STEALS Calla’s three of swords card and leaves. DUDE.

Oh god oh god oh god it’s the first day of school at Aglionby, and despite some truly adorable bits with the 3 boys getting along and Adam thanking his lucky stars that everything is okay between himself and his friends… Maggie drops this bomb on us. Their new Latin teacher is fucking Colin Greenmantle… Mr. Gray’s boss from the last book! AHHHHH!! Nooooo!!! Why are all the Latin teachers evil?? This is like the Defense Against the Dark Arts teaching position in Harry Potter nooooo!!

In the next chapter, we get to know Colin Greenmantle and he’s pretty much awful. So is his wife. They’re renting a farmhouse and while they’re definitely funny and entertaining, they just objectively seem like AWFUL PEOPLE. They’re magical artifact dealers. And have a personal vendetta against Nial Lynch and Colin says he can’t wait to fail Ronan in his class. He kind of reminds me of a man child.

Gansey and Ronan go over to Blue’s house and find the Gray Man play fighting with Calla, or teaching her how to break someone’s wrist. They tell him that their Latin teacher is Greenmantle, and Gray is like… well shit. Okay you kids don’t do anything, I’ll handle it. He tries to warn Ronan that if he does anything stupid, Greenmantle will do something horrific like take one of his brothers’ arms or something. Ronan just storms out. Gansey is sad because his friend is sad, so Blue gives him the fruit at the bottom of her yogurt. That helps a little. 

When Adam gets home from work late, Gansey shows up in his pajamas and an overcoat. He’s there with some kind of excuse about homework, but really he just wanted to chat. Adam realizes something about Gansey is off. He hasn’t really been the same since that moment in the pit. His confidence has faltered. Adam always thought he wanted Gansey to “get a taste of the real world” and experience how scary and unfair it is, but now he’s not so sure. He likes him the way he is. And does what he can to cheer him up in his Adam way. I love this line:

Adam couldn’t remember how they had managed to fight so continuously over the summer. Gansey, his best friend, his stupid and kind and marvelous best friend.

Gansey mentions that when they find Glendower, he wants to wish to bring Noah back to life. Then he heads out. We learn that Adam is hiding a letter with a court date for his father on the shelf. He doesn’t want to tell anyone about it. OH BABYYY!!

Blue gets into a fight with Orla when her cousin basically says “You need to make some actual friends at your actual school and quit hanging out with these rich idiots who are just going to leave you for the Ivy Leagues in a year. Also it’s weird how much you all love each other.” And Blue says “Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you Hey Gansey.” And they drive off together with Malory and his dog. They knock on the doors of local hillbillies, one of whom, Jesse Dittley, shows them the cave in his back yard that might be connected to the Cabeswater cave. Only he says it’s cursed, so they can never ever explore it. Now they have to decide if they’re going to persuade Jesse or trespass. 

The Gray Man shows up to Greenmantle’s farm house and points a gun at his wife’s head and the guy doesn’t even give a shit. He just eats cheese crackers while he threatens him. Piper (his wife) doesn’t care either. Greenmantle says he’s going to ruin Gray’s life if he doesn’t turn over the Greywaren in 9 days, and Gray said he’ll consider this and just leaves. I’m like COME ON GRAY. Just SHOOT THESE PRICKS like you SHOT YOUR BROTHER. But then we wouldn’t have a book and I do suppose I want to see what random way this book’s villain ends up dying in the end lol.

Adam is working alone at the mechanic shop at night during a thunderstorm when spooky stuff starts happening. At first he thinks it’s Noah, but he figures out pretty quickly that it’s Cabeswater trying to communicate. It doesn’t really know how else to communicate other then fucking scaring the DAYLIGHTS out of him and warping the scenery and showing him dead people. He scrambles to the tarot cards, flips 3 over, and focuses until he figures out what Cabeswater wants. It’s just a crack that needs to be repaired in the leyline. He’s just gotta move some rocks around somewhere. He says cool, I’ll take care of it this week and the room stops warping into nightmare world. Adam is relieved, but jittery, and it certainly doesn’t help when the fucking albino night horror monster shows up, next. 

Adam is crumpled on the ground when Ronan steps in like “Shoo. Go on, get.” — They exchange some sassy words. Ronan thinks school is lame and Adam tells him to go do his homework. Adam is making very conscious efforts not to fight with Gansey or Blue ever again, but he has a comfortable enough relationship with Ronan to know they will still have many fights. Ronan leaves in a huff. But when Adam gets in his car after work, there’s a jar of DREAM LOTION for his chapped hands that have been driving him crazy in his car. “Manibus” it says (Latin?) “For your hands”

AWWWWWWW YOU GUUYYYSSS!!! I think Ronan has a huge crush on Adam’s hands.

Gansey and Malory have a discussion about Glendower and the 3 people sleeping underground and blah blah blah. Okay then Noah shows up hahaha. They have a super cute exchange over this little metallic snowman Noah found in Ronan’s room. And then Gansey tells Noah he’d like to ask Glendower to give him life. Noah is touched by this, but doesn’t seem to believe it’s possible. The whole time they’re talking, Gansey is touching his ear because he thinks he feels hornets there. Noah stops him and blows cold air on his ears, saying “It’s okay. You’re safe. There’s nothing there.”

Because it was Noah and no one else, Gansey could admit, “I don’t know what I’ll do if I find him, Noah. I don’t know what I’ll be if I’m not looking for him. I don’t know the first thing about how to be that person again.” Noah put the clay in Gansey’s hands. 

“That’s exactly how I feel about the idea of being alive again.”

That’s the end of the chapter. AUGH I love these KIDS!! I love how much they love each other! They don’t behave like realistic teenagers AT ALL. They’re too emotionally mature and kind and intelligent hahaha But I love it all the same!!!

Also? I can’t reiterate enough how obvious it is that Gansey’s near-death experience obviously shook him. He’s been obsessed with Glendower ever since then, puzzled by the nagging feeling of “why me? Why was I saved?” — and he literally doesn’t remember who he was before this obsession. Beautiful character building.

Blue gets into a fight with Calla because she’s in an awful mood and misses her Mom so much it’s driving her nuts. Calla reveals that she misses Maura too, but their powers don’t work where Cabeswater is concerned. They can’t see events happening in it for some reason. Blue finds the list of names she made on St. Mark’s Day and takes it outside. She thought that hillbilly sounded familiar. And sure enough, his name is on the list. The Gray man is out there having a beer and I love that he’s like…part of the family now. They have the sweetest conversation and he sees Gansey’s name on the list. He tells her fate could change. Fate is a promise and promises can be broken. And he has a decision to make before Sunday. 

Gansey is laying in bed at night with his phone on his chest, waiting for Blue to call. Hoping she’ll call. (She doesn’t have a cell so he has to hope she’ll creep down to the reading room and also have insomnia like he does). Just as he’s chastising himself for wanting her to call him, she DOES. And they have a severely stupid conversation about ducks lol. But hearing her voice puts him in such a good mood. They hang up and then Ronan bursts in on him in the kitchen/bathroom/laundry room. There’s a cute moment where he tricks Gansey into listening to the murder squash song on his headphones, and after they laugh about that, he’s finally able to feel happy and go to sleep.

The next day at school, a classmate named Henry Cheng asks Gansey to sign his petition to hold an election for student council. Henry seems really sweet and like a good guy. So it sucks that Ronan is mean to him! Bad Ronan! He’s just crazy jealous. Like Orla said, it’s weird how much these kids platonically love each other.

Alright so Gansey is speaking with the principal about something we don’t know yet… so Ronan takes Adam out to the Barns. He shows him what he’s been working on… Which is trying to dream up an object that wakes up the comatose things his father dreamed. He shows Adam his “workshop”, which used to be Nial’s “workshop”, which is really just a dusty tack room with a chair and a blanket in it. Ronan shows Adam a few objects he’s made. One is this weird mirror, shifty, strange thing that Adam can’t look at for more than a second. When he holds it up to a cow, it’s ears twitch but it doesn’t wake up. 

Ronan reveals that the reason he’s so desperate to make an object like this… is because he realized that HE DREAMED MATTHEW. ON ACCIDENT. When he was a child. Declan told him. So he’s terrified that if/when he dies, Matthew will be comatose, and he doesn’t want that. 

This chapter is also RIFE with Ronan/Adam flirting!

As they moved through the old barn, Adam felt Ronan’s eyes glance off him and away, his disinterest practiced but incomplete. Adam wondered if anyone else noticed. Part of him wished they did and immediately felt bad, because it was vanity, really: See, Adam Parrish is wantable, worthy of a crush, not just by anyone, someone like Ronan, who could want Gansey or anyone else and chose Adam for his hungry eyes.

And when looking at the beautiful pictures in the tack room (contrasting Adam’s father’s office, which was all trucks and pin-up girls):

It was so different from what Adam’s father had pinned to his workspace walls that again Adam considered Ronan’s admiration of him. Someone like him treating someone like Adam as someone worthy —

When Adam asks why he keeps driving all the way out here to dream, Ronan answers that sometimes he dreams of wasps. So he can’t try this at Monmouth. Also, he says, he’s dreamt a punch of epipens and hidden them all over the factory and school. WHICH I TOTALLY CAUGHT. There was a line in the previous book when those thugs are going through the drawers, and an epipen spills out. But I’m pretty sure when we first meet Gansey in book 1, it says that his one and only epipen is in the glove box of the Pig. Anyway, I think it’s sweet that Ronan is scattering them all over the place. Gansey’s allergy is so bad, epipens might not even help, but it’s sweet that he wants to try.

Adam asks why he showed him all this. Ronan replies: “I hear if you want magic done, you ask a magician.”

That night, Blue calls and asks Gansey to tell her a story about the leyline. He does. Then afterwards, he feels all floaty again after getting to hear her voice before bed. 

There was nothing inherently guilty about the moment except that Gansey burned with guilt and thrill and desire and the nebulous feeling of being truly known. It was on the inside of him, and the inside was all Noah ever really paid attention to. The other boy wore a knowing expression. 

“Don’t tell the others,” Gansey said. 

“I’m dead,” Noah replied. “Not stupid.”

Meanwhile, Colin and Piper are like… the dumbest villains ever lol. And I don’t mean conceptually, I mean intellectually. Wow I hate these guys!! Good job Maggie! They’re just so shallow and callous with people’s lives and hurtful and SHALLOW. Piper has a little rat dog now. She reveals to Colin that she bought spelunking equipment because she thinks “Gray’s psychic bimbo” is down in the underground leyline caves. Thank goodness they don’t know where those caves are, right??? EEEHHHH NERVOUS.

Blue takes the car back out to Jesse Dittley’s house and Noah tags along. She strikes a deal with this hillbilly giant that if she cleans up his yard, he lets them explore his haunted cave. There’s a cute little montage of Blue (tiny but strong) getting the job done. Jesse says “Good ant” because she reminds him of an ant lol. 

 When her and Noah are planting the flowers, he starts acting weird. He starts chanting “Blue Lily, Lily Blue” and his eyes turn into black sunken craters and he’s being CREEPY AS FUCK and getting up right in her face. Jesse sees what’s happening and shoves a mirror in between them, which makes Noah shrink away and scream and then dissapear. Jesse makes her spaghettios and they talk about the nature of the haunted cave and how his family has almost been making like… sacrifices for generations? Like he knows one day he’ll go into that cave, and be killed by whatever is in there, then his son will have to come collect the bones. Like he did for his father. (UGH right??)

Well then Calla and Gansey burst into the house PISSED OFF because it’s been 6 hours since she took the car, she only has a learner’s permit, and she has no cell phone so no one knew where she was. When they get back to 300 Fox Way, EVERYONE is there (except Noah obvs). Ronan. Adam. The whole gangs there because they were out looking for Blue. Blue explains how she knows Jesse Dittley is going to die (tells them about the corpse road) and ADAM — our sweet, intuitive, intelligent, beautiful boy — catches on fucking immediately that one of their names is on that list. He knows she’s lying. ADAM IS SO FUCKING SMART. So he finds an excuse to pull her aside and is like “Which one of us is it?” And she is quiet at first, but eventually tells him, Gansey. And Adam is crushed. Then he’s like… well I fucking know what favor we’re asking Glendower for, then. 

Alright, Chapter 26 is a DOOZY.

Blue wakes up pissed off. Just pissed at how unfair and difficult everything is. So she calls Gansey and asks her to come get her. He seems kind of in a mood too. Not a bad one, just a real genuine… no more pithy little dialogue. Just raw and…REAL!

This wasn’t the Gansey she’d seen in the kitchen earlier; this was the Gansey she secretly called at night.

They drive around. Hands holding over the clutch. He teaches her how to drive the Camaro haha. THEN THIS HAPPENS:

She pulled over. She had thought it was such a simple thing to avoid kissing someone when she’d been with Adam. Her body had never known what to do. Now it knew. Her mouth didn’t care that it was cursed. She turned to Gansey. 

“Blue,” he warned, but his voice was chaotic. This close, his throat was scented with mint and wool sweater and vinyl car seat, and Gansey, just Gansey. 

She said, “I just want to pretend. I want to pretend that I could.” 

He breathed out. 

What was a kiss without a kiss? It was a tablecloth tugged from beneath a party service. Everything jumbled against everything else in just a few chaotic moments. Fingers in hair, hands cupping necks, mouths dragged on cheeks and chins in dangerous proximity. They stopped, noses mashed against each other in the strange way that closeness required. She could feel his breath in her mouth. 

“Maybe it wouldn’t hurt if I kiss you,” he whispered. “Maybe it’s only if you kiss me.” They both swallowed at the same time, and the spell was broken. 

They both laughed, again at the same time, shakily. “And then we never speak of it again,” Gansey said, mocking himself softly, and Blue was so glad of it, because she had played the words from that night over and over in her mind and wanted to know he had, too. Gently he tucked her hair behind her ears — this was a fool’s errand, because it had never been behind her ears to begin with and wouldn’t stay. But he did it again and again, and then he took out two mint leaves and put one in his mouth and one in hers.

WHEW!!! Fuckiiiin loved that. Well fuck it’s kind of short lived though. On their way home, they come across Henry Cheng whose car is broken down (at like 3am?? Dude.) so he asks to use Gansey’s phone. And his presence kind of breaks the spell of the night. Blue hates how Gansey’s voice changes when he talks to his Aglionby friends. She tells him this. I think she’s so wound up and hurt from wanting and not being able to have… and probably some dumb part of her 17 year old brain wants to spoil it for reasons other than the curse. 

Because she says some hurtful shit. Like “What was I thinking? You and I would never work. We’re from two different worlds.” Gansey is pretty wise though. He can tell there’s another component than this other than her dislike of how his voice changes when he talks to Henry.

“When are you going to tell me what this is really about?” This made her heave a great shuddered breath that was close to tears. “Never.”

AW BABIES!!

Okay so, I read the next chapter last night? And literally had to put the book down. I was like NOPE! TOO SPOOKY! Too late. Too dark. Too scared. This is what happens:

It’s the day the gang goes to explore Dittley’s cursed cave. It’s raining. Gansey feels off. Just like one of those days where nothing goes right. The mood is sour. His favorite sweater is dirty, so he has to wear one he doesn’t like. YOU KNOW. He’s also like… not ready to find Glendower. He’s like the dog that chases the car and doesn’t know what to do once he’s caught it.

But weird shit starts happening as soon as they enter the cave. Adam is like “shut up Ronan, cut it out. Quit singing.” And everyone says “Ummm Adam? No one is singing.” Then CHAINSAW THE BIRD opens her little beak like a record payer and stars “singing” haunting music about “all hail the Raven king. Here he comes lalalala” and then she flies off into the cave. Ronan is like…. “NO MY BABY!” And wants to go chase after her solo but everyone is like hell to the no, Rone this cave is fucking with us. Gansey asks Adam what he thinks, and when Adam touches the cave wall, his EYES TURN BLACK. I think this is something that’s been happening for a while when he does psychic stuff. He thinks they should keep going and the cave is just trying to scare them as a defense mechanism. 

So they keep going until they find like… basically a tomb. Decorated with statues and carvings and raven stuff and it’s like… this is it. This is the tomb of Glendower. They found it and it was THAT EASY — which just totally unsettles Gansey. The whole time he’s thinking… this is nothing like the vision I had in the spirit tree (because he literally saw that moment and this space looks different. The energy is off). They find a tomb with a big heavy lid/statue on it….

They found Chainsaw by the way and she’s fine lol

And here’s where I was like…nope. Too scary. They open the tomb, and it’s not Glendower. It’s a woman with her wrists and ankles bound, laying FACE DOWN, and when they open the impossibly heavy lid, and it falls loudly, HER HEAD SNAPS ALL THE WAY AROUND TO FACE THEM and she crawls out of the box. The way she’s described, she sounds like “The Ring” girl lol all long black stringy hair. And she’s singing the weird Blue Lily, Lily Blue song and laughing. Gansey flips from nervous and uncertain to calm, collected badass in a second. This lady is in her 20’s and is coo coo bananas. Keeps flirting with all the boys. Singing nonsense. They decide they can’t just leave her in the cave, so they take her out OH FUCK GUYS! REALLY???

I have such a bad feeling about this. The psychics said there were 3 sleepers and only 2 should be woken up. The other one they said ABSOLUTELY NOT TO WAKE.

Well they get outside and it’s raining blood and windy, and the sun is out, and there’s a, um… COMET IN THE SKY?? Gansey says that in the texts, there’s mention of a comet on the day Glendower was buried. The lady says she doesn’t like Adam. She calls him a mongrel (which actually really hurts his feelings). And Gansey sets her straight like “Hey we’ve been nothing but nice to you. His name is Adam Parrish and you will address him as such” and she’s like “YES MY LORD”. Turns out she wasn’t even asleep. This witch was buried and has been lying face down for hundreds of years. They take her to Jesse and she admits to haunting his family and killing his ancestors and is like “SORRYYYYY” and then they stuff her in the suburban. Blue has a cute moment with Jesse and says “We broke the curse, so now you can live happily with you family. Please don’t die” and he’s like “GOOD ANT.”

They take her to 300 Fox Way. 

Calla: “Do you remember how I said that there were three sleepers, and Maura’s job was to not wake one of them, and your job was to wake one of the others? Remember how I didn’t say anything about the other one? I did not mean bring her to my kitchen.”

Okay well at least she’s not the BAD sleeper. I was so afraid of this witch lady at first and now I’m calming down. She’s kind of more silly than anything. She says her name is Sorrow but she speaks in poems so I don’t know how true that is. Calla tells Adam and Ronan to go get supplies for her.

Adam and Ronan exchanged a wide-eyed look. Adam’s look said, What does that mean? and Ronan’s said, I don’t care; let’s get out of here before she changes her mind. Gansey frowned after them as they scrambled to the front door.

Fucking love them. Lol I love the imagery of these two SCRAMBLING for the door. I’d be like yeah let’s get away from the lady that can possess ghosts and birds please. Alright so crazy lady says that Artemis is the one who tied her up!! As punishment? When they untie her hands, she spins around and tells Gansey her name is actually Gwenllian. And he’s stunned, because that’s the name of Glendower’s daughter.

Chapter 29 is Adam and Ronan shopping for Gwenllian (wow that’s a pretty name) and I am here for it. “I don’t even know what to get, a kennel?” — Ronan. This whole scene is really adorable. Watching them throw toothbrushes and shampoo and shit in the cart. Like we all know the guys are friends. But I don’t think we’ve seen so many scenes with Ronan and Adam casually hanging out up until now. They see Colin Greenmantle’s wife with a shopping cart full of gardening stuff that looks dangerous. But they decide to drop it and leave the store.

There’s a random scene in the parking lot where Ronan is like GET IN THE CART PARRISH. And they behave like teenaged boys for a minute and ride/slam the cart Jackass style into Ronan’s BMW. This is so cute and spontaneous, I can understand why I’ve seen so much fan art of it lol. Ronan asks Adam to tell him what he’s researched about Greenmantle so he can get to dreaming about it.

Blue has a sweet conversation with Malory where he reveals his therapy Dog is for anxiety. But he doesn’t really have anxiety. He can sense auras. And when he’s around big crowds, it gets overwhelming. He says that Blue has a BLUE aura… the color of psychics. He also tells her about when he first met Gansey, this young squirrelly teenager who blew in one day then left the next without explanation. He tells her about how he kind of still had some PTSD back then… he’d collapse and claw at his face like hornets were there. I mean poor baby had this wild experience of DYING horrifically, then having a ghost…voice…revive him and tell him about Glendower. Or was it Glendower’s voice?? It’s not specified. They talk about Gwenllian being an illegitimate child of Glendower’s and how she might have been buried in a “shill” grave. Like a fake one to throw off grave robbers.

Okay so um, this next chapter. Fuck. Ronan and Adam are hanging out in the St. Agnes church. It’s night time. No one is there. Ronan takes Adam up to the choir pews where the organ is and a statue of Mary with little candles all around her. It’s very romantic, and they behave accordingly, sneaking glances at each other. Catching each other staring. It’s all very sweet. 

So they get to talking about what to do about Greenmantle. And Adam has this plan…. But it’s a nasty plan. The problem is they need to frame this guy for a murder he actually did commit (hiring a hit man to kill Nial Lynch), but doing that is going to be really hard. So Adam has an idea to frame him for a different type of crime. One that is taken VERY SERIOUSLY and is easier to put people away for. Maggie doesn’t go into details here, but I think it has something to do with…. Illegal… children stuff….. Ronan is VERY NOT OKAY WITH THIS. Because he’s the one that has to dream up the “evidence” to plant on this guy. But he understands why it needs to be done. 

He tells Adam “fuck it. I’ll do it now. Leave and I’ll make your stuff.” And Adam is like “I don’t wanna leave. Also brb I gotta go scry/separate my soul from my body for second to talk to my forest and ask Cabeswater to show you what kind of phone Greenmantle has, so you can dream up a copy.” - the fact that Adam can do this, that he knows how to ASTRAL PROJECT by staring at a flickering candle flame, is so cool. I love that he’s magic now. 

Well when Adam comes back from his conversation with the forest, he finds himself staring at a badly beaten, carved up, dying in pain…Ronan. AUGH the description of it is so gruesome. Adam is horrified, and moves to help, but is interrupted by the REAL Ronan perched up on the pew. He explains that he tried to warn Adam. Sometimes his bad dreams come back with him. He didn’t want him to see stuff like this. (I think Adam is white as a ghost at this point) — Like, HOW MANY TIMES HAS RONAN BURIED HIMSELF? How many times has this HAPPENED? He had to dream a double of himself for the monsters to kill, otherwise he would have brought them out with him in the real world. Ronan is pissed at Adam for making him dream this depraved shit… and seeing what I’m sure is something really private (his dream…deaths..) and they say nasty words after Ronan demands Adam leave.

Back in his apartment, Adam takes a long shower. He’s going through a lot… So it doesn’t help AT ALL when his fucking FATHER shows up at his door and pushes his way in. To Adam’s credit, he doesn’t rise to any of the bait that is being put out there. His father is saying this whole court thing is ridiculous and there’s no way he’ll win. He knows the judge. Adam is just crying for attention. Etc. Etc. Adam like… retreats into himself and can feel and smell Cabeswater and the branches growing protectively around him. His body is in that room, but his spirit is somewhere else. When his dad tries to touch him, he gets pricked, and has a thorn sticking out of his hand. Then he leaves. (So cool)

Adam stood there for a long moment. He wiped the heel of his hand over his right eye and cheek, then dried it on his slacks.

AUGH this poor KID!! Fresh off this traumatic event of watching his friend get brutally murdered… he’s got a magic forest talking to him in his head… and now this douche canoe of a father comes and starts shit. Like WOW why can’t Adam have nice things??

So Colin and Piper are in the cave and you want to hate them, but then they do really funny things. Like Piper is such a dingbat. She brought her dog and is picking up poop in a baggie. You almost, ALMOST like them and then Colin says shit like this: “What I’m going to do is hire a billion million minions to come look in caves for this woman, and if that doesn’t work, I’ll just eviscerate her daughter in front of the Gray Man instead.” - AUGH. FUCK YOU DUDE. Piper stops because she hears something, but we never get confirmation as to what. Colin randomly thinks about people sleeping and wanting to wake up one of them (??Cave, what are you doing??). Then they decide to leave. 

Blue sure wishes her mom would come home. Gwenllian is hella weird and exhausting to be around. But she’s getting more likable too. She’s like the house crazy lady now. Stealing everyone’s clothes, talking to trees, and storing things in her hair lol. Gansey keeps showing up to try to get info out of her, but she’s hard to wrangle. Lately everyone has been busy. Adam and Ronan keep running off to do their thing. Noah hasn’t shown up since he freaked out at Jesse’s house. And Gansey has some mysterious after-school commitment he keeps running off to. 

Gray comes over and Gwen is pulling a vacuum around the house like a dog lol She tells him her sad story of hearing about her Dad’s advisor trying to incite war. So she tried to stab him at dinner. She was sentenced to being buried alive after that. Gray tells Blue that Adam and Ronan HIRED him to help with this Greenmantle framing thing. He won’t tell her details but asks about her haunted cave and if she thought it might be a good place to hide bodies. Then he asks her to show him, so she’s like okay!

Sometimes this book just… makes you forget what you’re reading about lol. Blue tells her aunts the hitman is taking her out, so they go on their adventure. 

I love that Jesse and Blue are friends, and I love that he calls her Ant because she reminds him of these tough African ants he saw in a documentary once. Blue and Gray ask to see the cave, and Jesse is like “Sure but I gotta warn you, weird shits been happening lately” and he shows them. And basically these like… MONSTERS are coming out of the cave. Gray shoots one and it has like…3 heads? Blue thought they broke the curse by taking Gwen out of the cave, but Jesse thinks she was holding these monsters back. So. Now that’s a thing. 

ALSO WHAT HAPPENED TO THE COMET AND THE RAINING BLOOD? Did that go away? I suppose so since society isn’t falling apart??

That night, Gwen comes to Blue’s room with a spoonful of mayo lol. I like her random objects. Gwen, in unhinged sing-song, explains that she and Blue are similar. Blue would call herself a battery. Gwen calls them mirrors. Gwen also says— “YOU’RE A WITCH, HARRY!” And Blue is a little excited at the thought of finally having a name, even if it is witch. Gwen shoves Blue to stand between Neeve’s two mirrors, and when’s he looks to her left and right, her reflection vanishes. But she’s still there in the room. So that’s weird. Gwen eats her mayonnaise. I’m sure those mirrors will mean something later!!

Also I’ve decided I love Gray. He’s on the list with the boys, and Blue, and Maura — the list of people I will be heartbroken over if they die. Gansey is at the top.

Colin notices that his wife is acting super weird. She always stares at herself in the mirror, but when he calls her name she doesn’t respond. She’s staring off into space and then kicks him out of the bathroom.

In Chapter 37, Gansey is relishing moments of high school monotony. The happiness of walking in between Ronan and Adam. Watching the crowd part for them. Dew on the grass. Coffee in the air. Normal teenager shit. They run into Henry who is still on his very passionate quest to convince the administration to instate a student council. Gansey goes to get Henry coffee in the teacher’s lounge, which is adorable that he can just WALK in there and take stuff. Then he hears someone shout Adam’s name, followed by a LOUD NOISE.

Gansey spills back into the courtyard to see that some construction workers dropped a bunch of concrete panels, and it’s broken into pieces — fine shards — all over the courtyard. Ronan and Henry are COVERED in dust. Adam is standing eerily in the center of it, perfectly calm, protected by a bubble of air. Like he’s untouched. The grass around him is completely clean. WE LOVE OUR MAGIC BOY!!! Everyone is taking pictures like “omg Adam you’re so lucky!” I love this exchange:

Gansey leaned and Adam pulled him in even closer, gripping his shoulder tightly. Right into Gansey’s ear, he whispered, voice tinged in disbelief, “I didn’t — I just asked — I just thought —” 

“Thought what?” Gansey asked. 

Adam released him. His eyes were on the circle around him. “I thought that. And it happened.” The circle was absolutely perfect: dust without, dustless within. 

“You marvelous creature,” Gansey said.

Thank you for saying what we were all thinking Gans!

Okay so the next day is the court case. Adam is, understandably, a ball of nerves standing in the courtroom. Cabeswater is there with him in spirit. He can feel leaves wrapping around his body that aren’t really there. Adam is really regretting being there alone, now. He misses his friends. He wished he could get over his pride and let them in. THEN GANSEY AND RONAN SHOW UP. Ronan even tucked his shirt in and did his tie correctly. And Gansey strides up to the judge and shakes his hand because he KNOWS THE GUY and asks to be character witnesses. So the Judge is like “I’ll allow this!” — YOU ARE SO FUCKED ROBERT PARRISH. YOU’RE SO FUCKED!!

Adam has this amazing growth moment of realizing Gansey has always seen him as an equal. It was never a charity case. It was just friendship. Like real love for his friends.

Smash cut to a few days later. I guess we don’t get to find out what happened in court yet! But Adam asks Blue if she wants to come along on Cabeswater business. He’s sitting in a gas station wondering if the pulse in his veins is blood or the leyline and Noah shows up and is like “Yeah I wonder the same thing.” — Adam is like….ummmm did you just reply to my thoughts? Noah’s like I dunno.

OMG can we appreciate this scene, where they turn on the radio and the murder squash song comes on… and Adam panicky and ejects the tape. Blue is like HOW? HOW did that make it off the internet??

Noah cackled and showed them the cassette. It boasted a handmade label marked with Ronan’s handwriting: PARRISH’S HONDAYOTA ALONE TIME. The other side was A SHITBOX SING-ALONG.

Ronan dreamed him a mix tape. So fucking cute. 

They get to the forest and a tarot card tells Adam where to head: 3 boulders making something of a natural gazebo. There he scries, and says he’s never done this in front of people before, so he doesn’t know what he looks like. He thinks it’s not happening at first, but realizes pretty quickly that when he talks to Blue, she’s not responding. And his spirit is outside his body. He figures out that some rocks need to be rearranged on the mountain to help the leyline. Cabeswater asks for the Greywarren and Adam is like nah, he’s not here, just me lol. He figures out that there is more than one Cabeswater and he doesn’t know how awake the others are or if they’re connected somehow. I guess there’s a network of magical forests on the leyline. He drifts and drifts and finds himself in a cave with a spooky red door and a woman who seems familiar, but he’s so in spirit-mode he can’t remember her. A man is with her. They tell him to GO. I think this is Maura and Artemis. But we don’t know. 

Anyway there’s a spooky red door that is eerily enchanting. It’s equal parts terrifying and makes you want to open it like you’ve never wanted anything else in your life… but you’re also afraid. Adam gets sucked into this feeling and almost opens the door when Blue and Noah cut his hand and he gets thrown back into his body. They said he just went blank, and quit blinking, then he quit breathing, so they panicked lol. GOOD FRIENDS.

They move some rocks. The leyline is so happy, Noah is able to look SOLID and human. Not even a smudge. This cute thing happens:

They staggered back toward the trail. Blue’s arm was linked around the back of Noah, and her fingers grabbed Adam’s T-shirt so that they were one creature, a drunken six-legged animal.

Suddenly Adam remembers it was Maura he saw in the cave, and he tells Blue. DUN DUN DUNNN!!

Okay but seriously though, what about the comet and what about the court case MAGGIE??

Persephone calls Adam to have a one last psychic training session, and its at a general store on some rocking chairs. Adam is trying to get some information out of her. Like is Maura alive? How do I save Gansey’s life? But Persephone is all dreamy and just wants to talk about the number 3. And how significant that number is. Then, she vanishes, and Adam asks the clerk if he came here alone or not. And she says he’s just been talking to himself this whole time. 

Oh my god Chapter 41 is NUTS. Blue races home to find Adam and Calla getting ready to do some scrying in the reading room because Persephone is missing. Adam, who doesn’t trust anyone, tells Blue “I’m trusting you” — and Blue and Calla hold his hands. Blue is going to amplify his power and Calla is going to keep an eye on the thread to make sure he doesn’t get lost. If your soul strays too far from your body, you die. Adam’s eyes go completely black. And for a moment, he speaks WITH Persephone’s voice calling out for Maura. But then his voice comes back, calling for Persephone. Calla is finally like “alright, pull the cord” and Blue has to let go of him and sever her energy so he’ll wake up. 

“Cut him off,” Calla snarled. “I know you can. I’ll pull him back!” 

As Calla used her free hand to press a thumb to the center of Adam’s forehead, Blue frantically imagined what she had done to pull the plug on Noah back in Monmouth. Only it had been one thing to do it while Noah threw things about. It was another thing to do it as she watched Adam’s still chest and his empty eyes. Another thing as his shoulders sagged and his face fell into Calla’s waiting hands.

She tried to visualize the white light pouring down to strengthen them, but it was hard when she could see Adam’s body sprawled limply across the end of the reading table. Calla slapped his face. “Come on, you bastard! Remember your body!”

It takes a minute. But when he comes to, he says Persephone is in the house. Around some mirrors? So they race upstairs and they find Persephone between the two mirrors and she is DEAD!! WTFFFF!!!

Gansey and Ronan arrive late because Gansey’s phone was off and Ronan never answers his. Gansey leaves Adam with Ronan on the porch (after saying some very sweet things to the effect of “It’s not your fault, Parrish”) — and goes inside. Calla is SO UPSET. He says he’s going into that cave and he’s going to get Maura back. Calla is like NEAT I’m coming too. He leaves the psychics in the kitchen and goes upstairs to find Blue sitting on the floor by Perseophone’s bed. And we get this adorable scene:

It was against the rules, but Gansey crouched down beside her, one of his knees against her back, one against her knees, and hugged her. She curled against him, hands balled up against his chest. He felt a hot tear slip into the dip of his collarbone. He closed his eyes against the sun through the window, burning hot in his sweater, foot falling asleep, elbow grinding into the metal bed frame, Blue Sargent pressed up against him, and he didn’t move. Help, he thought. He remembered Gwenllian saying that it was starting, and he could feel it, winding out faster and faster, a ball of thread caught in the wind. Starting, starting — He could not tell who was comforting whom.

“I’m part of the useless new generation,” Blue said finally, the words right on his skin. Desire and dread lay right next to each other in his heart, each sharpening the other.

Maggie just… wtf. Beautiful.

Gwen kind of spins into the scene and speaks in songs and riddles. Says something about how Artemis taught her how to borrow people’s eyes. That’s how she spent the last 600 years. She says some riddle about a tree at night and Gansey asks Gwen to come with them to the cave.

Earlier that day or later… I can’t tell:

Adam and Ronan stand badassily in Colin Greenmantle’s field until he notices. They come out there and exchange some threatening words like “I know what you are” to each other, and Adam produces a Manila folder. 

Oh fuck is THIS how it goes down? Is THIS the plan, boys? I thought they were going to anonymously give it to the police or something. This is ballsy, but I have a bad feeling about this. Okay well they tell him that if he’s not out of town by Friday, everything in this folder comes true. Colin is especially unnerved by Adam, who has the same regal, far-off look as Piper who has been staring at the mirrors in a trance all day. The folder contains a CHILD’S SEVERED HAND in a baggie, and tons of emails, photos, texts, etc painting him as a murderer and pervert. Holy shit, game on. 

Colin…to my complete surprise…looks at the folder and is like HAHAHA YEP. Fuck this. Fuck all this. Clearly those boys have the Greywarren and know how to use it and IIIIIII no longer care. Honey! Get your coat. Pack your bags, we’re leaving town.

But Piper says NO. I hired two thugs and we’re driving out to the boonies to enter a cave, because I’m having visions about doors, they’re calling me, and we’re fucking going in the cave. Colin comes along, hoping he can convince her to stop it on the way, but they end up running into Jesse Dittley guarding the cave and she fucking SHOOTS HIM. Gray shows up and tries to stop them, but Piper is in full on badass mode and takes him hostage. Colin and Piper get in a fight, and then she tells him to just leave. Go run off like a coward. AND HE FUCKING DOES JUST THAT.

Alright, so the Gansey gang also enters the cave on the Cabeswater side. Calla stays in the car to keep time with Matthew after Blue begs her. Adam is at the front of the line with Ronan behind him, because they figure Cabeswater is more keen to protect the two of them. Ronan also brought his ghost light, one of his dream objects. Gwen is singing her crazy songs. They find THE PIT and Adam and Ronan opt to go in and check it out first. They’re like… full on besties now. Ronan even squeezes Adam’s arm when they’re looking down the pit as if to say “Don’t fall in”

When they get down there, they find some hornet nests (EEK!!) and between Adam’s magic and Ronan’s dream powers, they transform them into birds. I did not know this was something they could do. But NEAT!! They’re Gansey’s magicians. I think it’s the same Cabeswater magic that manifests your thoughts. 

Okay so then they go get the gang and bring them down there, and they find a massive room occupied by hundreds of animal bones - just standing on the ground, fully in tact and suspended upright. Some of them are from animals that are extinct or thought to not exist, like UNICORNS and primordial beasts no one has ever heard of. Gwen says some shit like “If you cannot wake these beasts, then how do you expect to wake my father?” — and Adam hatches a plan to pull his leyline magic toward Ronan, who has his weird dream object no one can look at, and Blue can amplify, and Gansey can point the rocks accordingly. They almost pull it off, but it’s not working. Then Gansey says, with authority, “Wake up” and the skeletons become real animals. YES. I think Gansey’s magic is… commanding things. He is the group leader, after all. 

The animals start stampeding toward the exit. Ronan and Blue manage to hop on the backs of some of them, and they hop out of the room before Gansey, Adam, or Gwen can follow.

Ronan and Blue adventure! LET’S GO!! They’re in a room with a cave lake that doesn’t make any ripples when you throw stuff into it. Ronan is so done. “Hey, I have an idea! Fuck magic. Fuck this.” — When Blue looks into the lake, she sees her mother’s dead body. Ronan pulls her back, saying it’s a trick. He saw his Dad, even though he’s buried in the ground. 

This is sweet. 

For a moment they remained that way, Ronan holding her as tightly as he would hold his brother Matthew, his cheek on her shoulder. Every time she thought she could go on, she saw the face of her mother’s corpse again. Finally, she pulled back, and Ronan stood up. He looked away, but not before she saw the tear he flicked from his chin. “Fuck this,” he said again.

Man, fuck this cave for showing these kids their dead parents. 

Blue remembers some nonsense Gwen said about mirror magic, and how people (witches?) with their particular ability had mirror powers. So Blue thinks she can walk across the shallow lake and be okay. But it’ll swallow Ronan if he goes in. So she has to go alone. He gives her his ghost light, which is super sweet because that means he has to sit there and wait there in the DARKNESS.

Holy shit. So Blue makes it across the river and finds a small chamber with the creepy red door. The door that holds the sleeper we are definitely NOT supposed to wake up. She finds ARTEMUS there, kneeling and looking worse for wear, then also MAURA BEHIND HIM!! She’s alive!! And she is not okay. Apparently they’ve been down there for a very long time, trying to resist the door. It’s so bad, they can’t move. Blue is okay. She hears the door tempting her, but she is a mirror, so it’s not as bad. She ties her parents’ hands and is determined to get them out of there. 

But then Piper shows up with one of her thugs and Mr. Gray in tow. They exchange words. Piper is truly awful and very stupid — going for the door that is probably promising her fame and money. There’s a scuffle, and for some reason the cave is COLLAPSING while everyone is fighting. I forget why it’s collapsing. Maybe from the stampede. It takes some effort, but Blue and her parents make it out safely, along with Mr. Gray. THANK GOODNESS. 

Okay… but what about THE GUYS?? MY BABIES?????

It jumps to a week later. Everyone made it out okay, yay! They gang is dropping Malory off at the airport. Adam picks at the scabs on his hand and thinks about what Persephone told him:

She had told him that there were three sleepers. One to wake, one to not wake. One in between. The others thought that Gwenllian was the one in between, but that didn’t really make sense, because she’d never been asleep. So he didn’t know if it was true or not, but he sort of liked to believe that the third sleeper had been him.

So that’s interesting. Maybe the third sleeper was Adam’s psychic ability. 

One is definitely Glendower. 

One is maybe Adam.

The third is some kind of bad no no we don’t want to wake up. 

Alright well in the epilogue, Piper wakes up in the cave. And NEEVE IS THERE. FUCKING NEEVE. And Neeve says “Hey, wanna get out of this cave? Help me wake them up.” And Piper is like “Fuck yeah!” And they OPEN THE GOD DAMN DOOR. FUCK!

And this?

The sleeper wasn’t human. Piper wasn’t sure why she’d expected it would be. Instead, it was small, and black, and shiny, with more legs than she’d expected. It was powerful. Neeve said, “We have to do it at the same time to get the fa —” Piper reached out and touched it before Neeve could move. “Wake up.”

And that’s the end of book 3!!! 

As always I’m finishing this book like “HAHA I LOVED IT! I THINK? What happened???” — like some of those parts felt rushed. I wanted to see the courtroom scene, but understand why that was cut. (Would have liked to hear the results of it, anyhow!). Still curious about the comet and raining blood lol. And the 3 headed monsters that were spilling out of the cave? What were Gansey and Adam doing while Ronan and Blue were trapped in the room with the mirror lake?? Is Artemis just like, out in the world now? Is it going to be weird with Mr. Gray there. 

Well all the same, I love this book. I love these characters and their severely strange and often scary adventures. I love the relationship emerging between Gansey and Blue. I love the relationship emerging between Adam and Ronan. I love Noah. He’s scary and adorable all in the same breath. They’ve got their group dynamic DOWN with the king, the mages, and the mirror. Everyone is starting to realize their powers, even Gansey, whose power is inspiring everyone and being POSITIVE. EXCELSIOR!

There’s one more book in this series and I’m not ready. AUGH. Here we go. 

Deadass Rating: 7.5/10

Unofficial theme song: “Cosmic Love” by Florence + the Machine

[wawawawawawawawawawawawawa]

the anon who doesnt have aspd and taught myself empathy again here! i've never talked to a psych (self diagnosed autism) and as a teen i was p sure i had aspd (i Knew shit was strange w me and really wanted an explanation and once i figured out my mix of trauma and autism things made sense) coz lack of remorse and shit but i never actually really matched the rest of it -- i dont have substance abuse issues and never have, im p easily entertained, i've had the same three friends basically my entire life. i do though describe myself as the worlds most boring hedonist coz like yeah i sometimes have a hard time controlling my impulses and im motivated by fun but for me thats usually p simple -- easily entertained. read a book, video games, jump around to music. i AM frequently bored though?? like its my most frequent emotion and ive spent a Long time learning to cultivate my joy and really feel it properly. but im also the most easily excitable person i know. i dunno, i have v large emotions that appear then disappear quite quickly. a favourire hobby of mine since i was a kid has been to start arguments between the ppl i care abt and see how large i could make them in a single session then solve the argument w/o the ppl realising i'd manufactured and egged on the argument. which typing that out now seems uh. an interesting hobby. but late last year i told my younger brother and he laughed coz its a v me thing to do and was like "yo thats fucked. pls stop doing it to me" so since then ive mainly tried to just like playfully tease ppl in a normal way coz cognitively i understand its a fucked thing to do and im trynna be like, a decent person who doesnt go outta my way to play w ppl for funsies. which yeah that uh... maybe i Should look into aspd more again, i did a fairly shallow look into it as a teen and relating to azula as much as i did as a kid (and izaya as an older teen/young adult) was deff a sign of smth

i've followed you on this blog for a while (i think you'd only had it for a couple weeks when i first followed u?) so yeah i did know the story abt u and ur fiance! v cute

i feel like maybe we need a different identifier than "the anon who doesnt have aspd" because that might not be, uh. accurate! i have o clue why a lot of people with aspd seem to congregate around my account but i guess this is an aspd helpline now??????? whuh????

like im not complaining its just. how did i get here

also i think ive deadass used the "worlds most boring hedonist" descriptor for myself before and i deal w chronic boredom the same way you do- i have a LOT of hobbies and i plan elaborate projects and that entertains me but only temporarily

and thats the thing about aspd! it- like every other disorder- is a spectrum. you might not have substance abuse issues, and i do. you did.... your interesting hobby, and i find it morally fucked!* i have no idea your relationship with criminality, and i got fired for stealing

*i have done something similar but i have a moral policy of like, only fucking with people who Deserve It. who deserves what varies case by case and what exactly i do... i need to explain weird spiritual stuff to go in depth andyeah im not really itchin to be called crazy on tumblr dot cum

aspd in general is very misunderstood and no literature really focuses on what its like to have the disorder, only the perceived damage being around someone with the disorder will bring- which is why i initially self diagnosed thru tumblr posts from ppl talking about their symptoms in a serious educative way

sometimes i think like, maybe i don't have aspd, maybe i'm just autistic and i'm spreading misinformation- but i never really felt "at home" with other autistic people. its like- yeah i click better with other autistic people, but i'm still masking, i'm still faking, and even in this situation i can drop the mask partially but not fully. growing up with a personality disorder and trauma in communities largely filled with autistic people with trauma, very quickly teaches you that there's something different about you. it's an isolating, traumatizing feeling- my experience with this was mainly symptoms of npd, but like.... knowing you have a problem, wanting it fixed, and knowing nobody around you knows how deep the problem runs, and might even find its existence laughable or dangerous... it's isolating! and its shitty!!

generally i tend to Know if things i'm doing are bad or not, i just tend to not care in the moment, because it's better than being bored! entertainment wins out over everything. it's actually kind of terrible; i'll do stuff just to see a reaction out of people- it's like izaya, honestly, what happens when people are pushed to their breaking points?

thats kind of how i got so much into angst and psychological horror. not only did i want to break the characters, i wanted to break my audience. i'd tell my friends detailed stories about torture partly because i was interested in my story, mostly because i wanted to see their horrified reactions. i wanted to see how far was "too far," and i keep that stuff in my current narratives- i keep the pov extremely tight and do silly little tricks with narrative and formatting to make the audience feel like they're Really There

so yeah look into aspd. do it boy listen to me im the ps5 im speaking to you inside your brain. do it boy do it

[incarnateirony]

Cool 2po.

so... you... lied... and called that tinhatting? because that's the information I shared. Like are you tinhatting cockles acknowledging that?

Because thanks dude. At least the wincels in my box will know even assholes I hate knew about this. But they probably won't be any happier with you than they were when you fucked them for 5K, which you refuse to respond to the receipts.

Yo, pissy wincels, go check out 2po's wall, even his ass knew they were rooming together.

cope.

Not sure why he pretended I was a cockles tinhat for sharing that.

Or maybe that cap is him reverting his dialogue and realizing, I never actually shipped cockles, and his snotrag source is realizing he's been feeding him bad intel, and 2po's been realizing he's been getting clowned. Yeah dude. The idea of me shipping cockles ends at basic real info like that. Just like all your little fucked up spins about what you think is said inside the server that you've been met with receipts otherwise.

Maybe, just maybe, you should stop listening to snotrag without receipts you read very carefully. Instead of trying to argue about, and then just. Projecting deadass lies.

That doesn't absolve you. It just makes you more guilty dude.

and um? I don't? Care? About what J2 did? 12 years ago? We were talking about recent history yall habbalooed about. Also--no? The entire reason he moved to Van was so he wouldn't have to travel around and could stay largely local for filming with an occasional week of vacation or whatever when Cas' filming schedule got denser.

Nice attempted cope adjustment though. Very smooth.

Yes dude, nobody saw the utility bill, because I deleted it, one person is dead, and one person disappeared, And everyone agreed that was the right thing to do. Why are you even arguing against the utility bill if you admit you realize they lived together? Pick a lane to argue, motherfucker, don't just argue for the sake of arguing.

bro you realize even the information you have came from me, right.

Four people got the distro, well one OP 3 distro. I'm the only one that disseminated it. You're still working on my scraps and crying you didn't get the steak. "people in the highest ring haven't" bitch i am the highest ring. And by the way, what do you perceive "the highest ring" around me to be? If you say dominus, i'm gonna laugh my ass off. The other distro people aren't even POLOL members dude wtf

this man truly that confident when he's working on my own like 17th degree scraps and thinks he can suss out The Highest Ring.

my server's 2 1/2 years old and he's talking about shit from like 5 years ago and saying the "highest ring" didn't see it no shit sherlock? what's your FUCKING complaint? That I ethically deleted the major security violation I was sent instead of distributing it? Oh wait. Of course you would have. This is a super weird highkey creepy way for you to admit you'd doxx them and save their info for half a decade.

[baconlettucetomatoeggs]

to create another self

ante script: there are two posts which i wanna make before making this that i forgot to do. one of them was this. thank god i remembered you while buying sotanghon (glass noodles! TIL)

with that, enjoy!

Her long hair pulled away from her face, braided and falling down her back, Mother Nature says, “Of course, I failed. Not just the drug test—I failed everything.” Not just as a nun, but throughout most of her life . . . She shrugs, her freckled shoulders under the tie-dyed straps, “So here I am.” The constellations shifting and crawling across her face, Mother Nature says, “I still needed someplace to hide.”

-"Under Cover". "Haunted" by Chuck Palahniuk

i dunno 'bout y'all but when i get older, i cant make any more selves. like what does it mean to create a new account?

for us who were under the grasps of Dummy World (you know, those facebook trend where you make dummy accounts just to get fucked on, psychosocially or even physically, if you're into that. there's a lot of romanticism and cringe-tastic wattpad stories though. that's because they're honest to themselves. looking back, i feel pity), escapism is as natural as breathing. you just heretofore and go on to your new life. everyday is a new day to live. this is why it's so special and very important for us to be at least grounded with our own selves. revealing out your RA (real account) to your close confidants doesnt mean succumbing to deadnames, but rather quitting and giving up transcendence and be together in something more sold (but not stalking enough. opsec always.) and idk, it's not a good memory? my peeps seen just gruesome tales from the other side of the screens. the thoughts we post are brutal as hell, not for the faint hearted. mixed with romanticisation of la chiuy* doesnt really do as much, aint it?

to create another account is to give up your identity. i forget who you are, and you forget about me. it means to actually disconnect. to fade.

and that's how it felt to me what creating new accounts were: the preparation of this new self, is not for anyone. there's a certain kind of genius to prepare such things. or y'know, do opsec :p

--------------------------------------

carmen hermosillo talks on her pandora's vox essay about the commodification of identity. where all of our interaction into commodification. back then it was just random likes and threads to the fora she was under, but now it's literal money through ads and clicks.

it is a black hole. and we're all getting lost in the spectacle.

and that spectacle, of course, is real in measurable sense: you have parasocial breakups, parasocial love, parasocial sloppy kisses, parasocial sexting, parasocial orgies, parasocial Salò, parasocial everything. even existences is parasocial. there's no true self and even illusory to have such a thing to believe to; there's nothing real on the internet, or rather the desert of the Real encompasses the cyberspace virtuality

we are all just entities left and right, to disappear any moment, and im still deadass scared with that fading away. why? because i still have the meatspace that does not clone, recreate, duplicate, format, erase my own self. what i got is what shall i got. a write-only memory. a fully BTRFS filesystem without deduplication. a flash memory without TRIM

--------------------------------------

to create another self means to exist in another plane of existence. to create another self means to be in another place, in another time. the forum's all ran down but the phpbb still works. you're still here in the thick orange haze.

to create another self means to abandon. to create another self means to spread yourself thinly so as you become homogenised in the air. to create another self means to

--------------------------------------

honestly i dont even wanna think about creating a new account. i dont wanna change myself anymore. to change yourself means defeat of your own system and needs to be broken down. existential crisis. and i dont wanna experience that anymore.

and what do we do? create. again. break down the wall. escape.

a lot of dummy world users were making those dummy accounts so as they wont be cross-referenced with their thoughts. the All-Encompassing Eye stalks everyone of us. everything's connected. to say anger, to foul-mouth, means prosecution, or even punishment.

or going back to my quote from above, to escape one's crimes.

this is why i love Raskolnikov: he wasnt punished rightly by his crime, so Nature punished him. talking about karma of the most existentialist ways. god i love his character so much. such a silly silly jester fool.

what kind of sins do you run away with?

--------------------------------------

the solace of the other self; the Cassanova. the Ascetic. the Hermit. to become one with yourself and only yourself means a lot.

the insistence of a static identity in a dynamic universe.

to discover you're trans also means you hide even at your own thoughts. you realised you're in a solitary confinement of your own body. how's that for 10+ years of lying to yourself?

to discover what kind of failure you are, and how you are in the society: to accept one is not a singular entity, but a confluence

to realise responsibility is cause and effect. to compare your tribulations to blindsight you with your own defeats the purpose.

to hate everyone that steps on the miserables, while being diagnosed with Oppositional Defiant Disorder.

--------------------------------------

You can't explain. By now, you've run out of quarters, so you tell your folks good-by

-"Foot Work". "Haunted" by Chuck Palahniuk

[erodasfishtacos]

HSLOT WASHINGTON D.C.

Like, comment, share, and come talk if you enjoyed the fic.

*inspired by this *

I write for free - so if you would like to support my work, you can donate here. (plus my bday is coming up in a week 😌)

-

Despite Harry being less than active on social media, it doesn’t mean that he didn’t creep through Instagram and Twitter after the shows.

He used a fake account to scroll, constantly liking pictures and videos of his wife dancing or funny fan signs to his phone.

Tonight, after the Philly show, YN was already fast asleep in their tour bus bed - she had curled into Harry with her leg between his and her head on his bicep.

Harry was trending on Twitter for his show, however, he scrolled a bit further and noticed that a hashtag called #JusticeforYN was trending.

When he clicked on the link, it took him down a rabbit hole of screenshots and videos from the concert.

It doesn’t take long to see what had happened, it was a girl recording herself on Snapchat from the pit during the concert.

The ‘fan’ held up her phone enough that you could see her but also YN, Jeff, Harry Lambert, and Tommy in the background behind the pit.

Adore You started blasting through his AirPod and the girl recorded his wife dancing with their friends - he gets distracted for a moment, watching her have fun and sing along.

He loved her so fucking much.

But then, it’s the next clip, and the captioned text on the video said ‘Harry’s Whore.’

The small smile on his face disappears instantly when he sees where this is going.

In the next few segments, the girl is screaming things at YN who can’t even hear them because of the music but it’s still completely disrespectful.

“Hi, Harry’s Whore!”

“Get the fuck outta here, nobody wants you here!”

“Fuck you!”

It makes Harry rage, even from the comfort of his bunk with his perfect love, and then he digs deeper to find his real fans defending YN.

YN was pretty loved by the fans. She was always kind, posted pictures of Harry (because he rarely did), and made really kickass merch.

He finds the Twitter account of the girl who harassed his wife, her name was Gina, and he read through her tweets.

She was going to three more of the concerts - following them from Philly to Detroit.

One of her tweets said…

‘If you guys are mad about what I said during the last concert, just wait what I have to say to her next time.’

And he also finds out that she had won a meet and greet for the DC show through the record label and Harry already knew what he was gonna do.

-

YN wakes up before Harry, sitting in the small living area of the bus - watching a cooking show on the television and still slightly dozing in and out of sleep.

“Hi bun,” She mumbles, opening her arms and legs to let Harry flop between them. Chest to chest and he was a bit to heavy for this but he liked laying like this.

“Mornin’, my love,” Harry rasps, peppering kisses all over her jaw and the smooth column of her neck until she giggles.

“Shouldn’t you be saying good morning to your whore on tour?” YN replies, her voice is light and unbothered - obviously found out the online drama.

Harry tenses up, looks up at her seriously, and tells her, “M’gonna take care of it.”

“Don’t, it’s fine, bubs,” YN assures him, she’s smiling softly and Harry just…he is so obsessed with the woman below him that he has to kiss her for a long moment.

“No, it’s not. I’m not going t’let someone treat m’wife like that. She won tha’ meet and greet. I’m gonna have a talk w’her when she comes backstage,” Harry tells her, lips brushing on every word and he can help but grind his hips forward against her.

“Always so horny in the morning,” Yn teases but still lets her thighs fall open a little bit more so that the only barrier is their underwear.

“Can y’blame me? Look wha’ I wake up to,” He rumbles, voice getting illogically deeper and raspier when he speaks.

It’s not long before he tugs his briefs down just enough and her panties to the side to get inside her with his lips glued to hers.

He’s whispering things that would make him blush with embarrassment if anyone heard him.

“Can’t believe y’mine after all this time.”

“Y’my perfect match, on m’knees for you whenever you ask.”

“Arena full of people and all I see is you, baby.”

“Feel like heaven.”

“Only y’make me feel like this.”

“Come on, stubborn girl. Show me y’love me.”

-

Harry looks insanely stunning in his purple outfit but honestly - YN always steals the show (without even trying). ***

They’re in a common area, waiting for the meet and greet with the fans - it’s comical how Gina’s face drops when she arrives to see Harry facing away from everyone with YN giggle as he crowds her up against a wall.

They can hear Harry murmur, “Y’alway showin’ me up. Only gonna be able to look at y’during the show, bug.”

“Harry,” Jeff calls to his client, making him turn around and his eyes instantly search the small groups of fans until his eyes land on a girl dressed in a bright pink fishnet dress and boa.

“You,” Harry points at her, his face isn’t giving away any emotion, “Can I have a chat w’you?”

“S-sure,” She stutters, eyes wide and excited - oblivious that Harry actually knows what she had been posted on social media.

The singer takes her off to the side, YN’s eyes keep darting to them as she chats with the friendly fans who are complimenting her dress and her merch designs.

Frank is standing near Harry, prepared to escort the girl out after the conversation.

“Can we get a selfie?” Gina asks, pulling out her cellphone.

“No,” Harry replies seriously, “You also are going to get escorted out of this arena and banned from any of my future concerts.”

“Wh-what?” The girl stumbles, eyes watering as she looks at him in confusion and dismay.

“I need to make this a safe space for everyone who comes to my concerts. That especially includes m’wife. And I don’t feel comfortable havin’ someone scream at m’wife and posting nasty things on social media attending my concert.”

Realization flashes across Gina’s face, “I’m so so sorry. I can apologize. I really didn’t mean-“

“No. I don’t think my whore of a wife would want to hear it,” Harry chuckles with a nasty edge, “Y’can fuck off now. Go find a new artist to harass ‘cause if I see y’face at one of m’concerts - y’getting kicked out immediately.”

Frank appears beside them, gently guiding the hysterical girl out of the room while the fans look back in confusion.

They forget all about it once Harry saunters up to them and gives them a crooked smile, “Hi, m’Harry. How are y’guys?”

The fans don’t miss his hand moving quickly to squeeze his wife’s hip in reassurance before starting to sign things and take pictures.

-

Later that night, the disgruntled ‘fan’ sends out a nasty few tweets where real fans go after her and defend YN.

Also, the true fans are cooing over the fact that Harry is such a good husband.

haleyhs22: omg, could you imagine being called out by the nicest guy on this earth

tpwkjess_young: okay but I wish I had the luck that @ynstyles has to get a manz like that 😩

UsWeekly: Harry Styles bans ignorant fan from tour after nasty videos were leaked attacking his wife

strawberriesinsummer: harry is such a VIBE. Like he deadass kicked that girl out and then spent the whole night trying to seduce his wife with his shimmies and winks - he’s the hoe 🍑

-

[yikesitskennawrites]

Transitions- Chapter Eighteen: Chatting With An Acquaintance

Series Masterlist

Previous Chapter

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Pairings: Steven Grant x (platonic) Reader, Marc Spector x (platonic) Reader, Jake Lockley x (platonic) Reader, Layla El-Faouly x (platonic) Reader  

---

“It’s nice to meet you again,” Layla says as she holds out her hand and smiles at you. You grasped her hand with your own and shook it awkwardly.

“It’s been awhile hasn’t it?” You reply and she hums in answer as you let go of her hand. “We really need to stop meeting like this.” You gesture towards Jake who stood next to you and Layla. He adjusted his flat cap so it wasn’t covering his eyes. “Twice now that we only met because of the boys.” The three of you stood in Stevens and Marcs apartment, you still wore your work uniform and your feet were still aching from the five hour shift you did. A suitcase with wheels rested next to the sofa, you assumed it was Layla's. 

“They’re always up to something,” Layla adds and crosses her arms over her chest. “Y’know the time before last, I had to track Marc down to Cairo; at least Jake tells me that he needs help with something.” 

“Jake asked for your help?” You raise your brow and give her a questioning look before shifting your gaze to the man in question. He didn’t seem fazed at all, but rather expectant of your confusion and slight anger. “I’m surprised that he asked.”

“He didn’t directly ask, but told me that he had a job for me.”

“And that's babysitting me,” 

“Looking after and house sitting,” Layla corrects. 

“Same thing. It’s just a polished sentence so I don’t feel babied.” You wave her correction away. “Don’t get me wrong, there’s no fucking way I can take care of myself up against a cult especially after what happened last month-”

“What happened last month?” 

“-But, I’d rather call this house-sitting what it actually is rather than putting kind words on it.”

“What happened last month?” Layla repeats her question and you share a look with her. 

“Jake didn’t tell you?” You ask and she purses her lips before you both look at Jake. “You have the audacity to ask her to babysit me but you haven’t told her the reason why?” He doesn’t answer and you scoff, raising your arms into the air as you make the gesture of flipping a table. “Typical. Right, I shouldn’t have been surprised. Jake has been fronting since last month when Marc and I got attacked by a group of insane cultists. He told me multiple times that he only plans on being in the driver's seat until his job is complete and then he’s going to disappear.”

“Are you serious?” Layla scoffs. 

“Deadass.”

“What?” 

“I’m serious.” You tell her. Of course the older generation wouldn’t understand the slang, that’s been the third time it happened. “I thought that maybe he would tell you a little more than he let me in on but I was wrong.”

“You were attacked by a cult and neither of you told me?” Layla says. She frowns and glares between the two of you. The glare almost made you take a step back and rethink your decision of not telling her. The look in her eyes reminded you of your own mother when you got in trouble for skipping school once. She grounded you for two months after that and you had to listen to a long lecture about her and your fathers disappointment in you.

“What was I supposed to say?” You gave her a look of disbelief. “I was attacked and attempted to be kidnapped; but hey, that soup I ate for dinner was good? Besides, I didn’t know that I could have talked to you.”

“Yeah. You were supposed to tell me that.” Layla says. “I literally told you to call me if you needed anything.”

“I thought you were just being nice!” You defend yourself. “I thought it was just something you were telling me because that’s what people do.”

“I wasn’t telling you just to tell you that. I was being genuine.”

“Okay, well that’s nice to know for future shit-shows.” You say. “Be angry at Jake for not telling you all the details because from my understanding, the two of you have talked enough to have a relationship.”

“Acquaintanceship.” Layla says and pinches the bridge of her nose. She turns her anger towards the man that the two of you were brought together through. “You had an entire month to tell me.” She states. She sounded pissed and disappointed in the man. You cross your arms over your chest and watch the argument unfold.

“It’s not your problem.” Jake replies. He didn’t look concerned or scared, not one bit. Instead, he gave a nonchalant vibe by studying his gloves and frowning when he noticed that one of the crescents on his knuckles were scratched. You rolled your eyes. You weren’t surprised at his emotional state, he really didn’t give two shits about you.

“It is when you bring Marc and Steven into it.” Layla hisses at him. Her hands curled into fists. “You brought a kid into this shit.”

“I’m sixteen.” You say and she shoots you a glare. The sight made you keep your mouth shut for a few moments. 

“I didn’t bring them into anything.” Jake defends. “Your ex-husband and his buddy brought them into this the moment that they invited them for dinner.”

“But you continue to let them hang around even with your Moon Knight bullshit,” Layla says. You press your lips together as you listen to her suck in a breath. 

“They’re better off around me than they are without.” He says, “You don’t know what Harrow's cult has planned.”

“And you do?” You raise a brow. “You won’t even tell us what you’re doing or where you’re going; and you’re implying that we need to trust you just because you want Steven and Marc happy and safe.”

“God, you’re just like Marc.” Layla groans. You blink and turn your attention to her and back to Jake. He didn’t seem to have a reaction to that statement. In your opinion, Marc and Jake weren’t exactly the same. Marc was definitely more likely to try for a relationship unlike Jake who is there one moment and gone the next. You frown at the woman. You don’t understand how she reached that conclusion, but you knew that she was once married to Marc so she knew much more than you knew about him. The tension in the room felt suffocating. You didn’t like the silence coming from Jake and the frustration flowing out of Layla. 

“He’s not like Marc,” you say, causing the two of them to look at you. “Jake looks like a toad.”

“De vuelta a esto, ¿eh?” Jake mumbles and throws his hands into the air. You give him a small smile since you weren’t sure what he was saying was good or bad. He’s probably threatening to beat you up at this rate. He adds, “After this trip, you won’t have to worry about Harrow's followers or me.” 

“So, you’re going somewhere to destroy Harrow's cult?” You ask. He doesn’t say anything and you’re satisfied with the silence. “See? Was that too hard to say?” He doesn’t answer and you sigh. You decided to try to push your luck by asking him the length of time he would be gone. He doesn’t answer but instead he walks towards the dining table and picks up a duffle bag before swinging it over his shoulder. You quietly watch him stride to the entrance and swing it open before shutting it behind him. Layla throws her hands up and you frown at the sight of the door. You didn’t know if you should let him go as peacefully as he could or demand answers that you knew you would never receive as long as he is in the driver's seat. Of course, you had a reputation of annoying him today, might as well follow through with it. 

“I’ll be back.” You tell Layla as you speed walk to the door and open it before shutting it closed. Jake was already at the elevator, his eyes were on the rising numbers above the door as you approached. 

“So, you’re leaving just like that?” You say as you close the distance between the two of you.  “Without saying goodbye?” You stop a few feet away from him and place your hands on your hips. He gives you a look. “You better come back,” You warn. You don’t know why you say it, he made his intentions clear on the drive to the apartment complex. He’s not doing this for you but rather his alters. 

“I’m pretty pissed that you’re leaving me in the dark- and stop giving me that angry glare, I’m not going to push your damn buttons right now since I know you’re not going to answer any of my questions.” You huff out. “Just…be careful.” He doesn’t answer and you don’t expect him to. He was the brooding person you always knew since day one of meeting him. 

“Stay safe.” Jake says in return and you both hold a stare between the two of you. Just like you don’t know why you said what you said moments ago, you lift your arm into the air for the promise-shake you did with Marc and Steven over a month ago. He looks between you and your arm. “What?”

“I want a promise.” You tell him. “A deal that you will come back.” 

“What are you nine?”

“Sixteen actually.” You say. You know that he made the jab just to try to get underneath your skin, but you couldn’t care less about it. You add, “You should already know that if you’re keeping tabs on me and anyone I work with.” You don’t lower your arm, you were determined to at least get this deal from him since you couldn’t get any other answers besides the fact that he was going to go destroy Harrows cult.

“Pinky promise like we’re children?”

“Surely you were around when I made Steven and Marc make a deal with me that they would tell me anything that had to do with my life?” You say with a raised brow. You can’t tell what expression he was wearing in the dim light of the hallway. Your building really needed to get better lighting. But, the noise of him releasing a groan caused you to internally pump your fists into the air in victory. 

“I can’t promise you that I’ll come back,” He says. “But I can make a deal with you that Steven and Marc will.” And that was good enough for you. He raises his own hand and clutches your arm and you return his grip with your own hand. You both shake once before he lets go as if you were too hot to touch. You lower your arm and you both stand in silence for a minute until the noise of the elevator dinging interrupted the peace. You shift your eyes away from him and to the sliding metal doors of the box. This might be the last time you see Jake Lockley. Well, it might be the last time you see the body of Marc, Steven, and Jake if they don’t come back at all. Jake steps into the metal death box and you watch as he presses the button to the lobby floor. A little past him, decorating the walls were mirrors. 

Your reflection stared back, bags were underneath your eyes from sleepless nights and your collar bones showed a bit from underneath the collar of your shirt. You didn’t look well and you definitely still felt like shit from how little you took care of yourself. You looked half-dead. For a moment, you wondered if Marc and Steven were staring back, this was the sight that would have greeted them whenever Jake visited. How were they doing? It’s been awhile since you last heard of them from their alter, he’s been too wrapped up in whatever he’s been doing to not stop by. You raised your hand to stop the doors from closing and looked at Jake. He looked like one of those cartoon dad characters that don’t know how to express their emotions well with his bushy brows and mustache growing above his lips. He adjusted his flat cap to rest better on his head as he waited for you to do whatever it was you were about to do.

You wet your lips before you ask, “How are they?”

“Pissed,” Jake says. He looks at the mirror to his right and narrows his eyes at the sight. In the glass, you saw the reflection of Jake glaring at himself and your half cut off reflection of yourself from where you stood in the entrance of the elevator. You guessed that he saw the other men. “Steven says you need to eat more and get more sleep.”

“Is Steven really saying that?”

“Well, are you surprised? He’s been mommying you since day one.”

“Oh, fuck off.” A British accent says, causing you to step back in surprise. You watched as Jake loosened temporarily into a slumped posture before his back straightened once more and he had a resting bitch face. You raised your hand back up to stop the doors from shutting as you stared at him. That was the first time you ever saw another alter forcibly take control for a split second. The transitions between Marc and Steven were smooth whenever they switched, but this was completely the opposite. 

“What…?” You breathe out. Jake looked more pissed than usual.

“Let go,” He says and gestures to your hand holding the door. You didn’t know what to say, you were too stumped over the sudden and forcible switch you just witnessed; and besides that? You just heard Stevens' voice for the first time in a month and you didn’t realize how much you missed it until now. The sooner you let Jake go, the sooner you would get Steven and Marc back. So, you removed your hand from the elevator to let the third alter leave. You hoped that he would keep his end of the deal as the elevator doors finally shut and the floor numbers began to tick down to the lobby. 

You stared at the descending numbers until the screen showed a L. Behind you, you heard a door open and close before there was a jingle of keys. The noise was what caused you to swivel on your heel and walk back to your neighbors apartment. You watched your other neighbor, the girl who thought you were having a lover's quarrel with Steven keep her head down as she passed you and made her way to the death trap box. You haven’t talked to her since then, you both were too awkward to communicate since the admitted assumption that Steven was your sugar daddy made things weird. The thought grossed you out and caused your stomach to churn as you opened the door to his flat and closed it not a moment afterwards.

Layla was sitting on the couch as you entered the apartment. Her eyes trailed to you as soon as you locked the door behind you. The television was playing a BBC News broadcast of the weather and the short spike of a heatwave in the middle of this week. You didn’t like the heat, the last time there was a heatwave you were a puddle of sweat on the floor of your living room.

“Steven said that you’re a junior in high-school.” Layla says as you cross the room and awkwardly sit on the other end of the couch. You bring your legs up onto the cushions and hug your legs to your chest as you watch the broadcast switch over to one of the main ladies at the desks and they begin to talk about the upcoming summer bank holiday. 

“I’m a senior now.” You reply. “School starts back up in September. I should be graduating in early June next year.” You were glad for the summer break the United States schools offer, but honestly you just wanted to wrap up your schooling now so you wouldn’t be stressed about passing your final year while working full time.

“Steven said that you planned on working after you finish school.” 

“Yeah.”

“You don’t have any other plans?”

“I don’t think I could make any other plans.” You admit. “University isn’t an option anymore and traveling isn’t much of one either.” She hums and you both watch the television for a moment. 

“Are you excited to finish school?” She quietly asks. “Yeah,” You shrug. “I’ve been looking forward to wrapping up my basic education since I entered high-school.”

“I remember graduating.” Layla says. She had a look on her face as she stared at the television. It was clear that the two of you were using it for background noise and neither of you cared to pay attention to it. “I was in the class of 2014. After I completed school, I went on many trips with my father to the sites he was digging at.” She looked a little sad as she finished.

“How was that?”

“It was fun.”

“Did you find anything cool?”

“Plenty of fossils and ancient antiques.” She shrugs. “I found an old vase from the Han Dynasty period.”

“Which was?” You remember learning about the time period in middle-school but you don’t remember much of the history. You mainly remember learning school shooting drills and something about the Aztecs in history class.

“Around two-hundred and twenty common era.”

“Oof, wow.” You say. Your eyes became wide in awe. “How was it preserved?” You would think it would be cracked from the thousands of years and probably not that good.

“It was in a good condition, not a single crack or chip. The paint was kind of faded but that’s to be expected from over a thousands of years of sitting on a shelf.”

“Where did you find it?”

“It was in the Han Empire area.” She states. You give her a confused look. “Eastern side of China.” Your mouth makes an O shape as she continues, “The place where I found it was underneath an abandoned rich person's home, kind of in a basement like room. The room was hidden away…” She trails off and you stare at her. “Art was very privileged and a sign of wealth, especially back then.”

“What did you do with it?”

“I kept it.”

“You kept it?”

“Yep.” She pops the P and smiles at your awed and incredulous look. Her eyes crinkled at the corners and her teeth were showing.

“You didn’t sell it to become rich?”

“Some things I want to keep for myself.” She shrugs. “Besides, what would I say to someone when they ask where I found it? I can’t exactly tell them that I trespassed into an abandoned area and took something. I would have gotten arrested for that and be put to death. Especially in China. Over there they take thievery much more harsher than the United Kingdom or States do.”

“What the fuck?” You breathe out which caused her to laugh. “Steven did say you work dangerous jobs. I just didn’t expect this.” She was kind of like Lara the Tomb Raider.

“What did you expect?”

“I don’t know. Maybe some protection job like a police officer or a bodyguard. That would have explained why you had a gun that night we met.”

“No,” She chuckles. “I collect items and sell them on the blackmarket or to any wealthy human willing to buy.”

“Wow.” You state and shake your head a little. You wouldn’t have thought that was Layla's choice in career, but of course you were wrong.

“So, quick question…” She starts. You raise a brow at her. Man, you hoped that she wouldn’t ask you something to kill this mood.

“Shoot.”

“Is it true you stole a table?” She asks.

“I thought it was free.” You state, your cheeks flushing red in embarrassment. She lets out a boisterous laugh. 

“At least Marc tells the truth about that.” 

“Why wouldn’t he?” You frown at her statement. What was that supposed to mean? She doesn’t answer but the smile she had slowly falls from her face. Whatever Marc lied about obviously caused her some pain.

“What time do you work tomorrow?” She asks instead of answering.  You wanted to know what had her so worked up over Marc and his lies, but you decided not to push her on the subject because if it was you, you wouldn’t want to be questioned about it either. Layla was much like Marc in that regard. She’ll tell you eventually.

“Seven to three.” You say. “Usually it’s nine to five or nine to two, but the manager is going on maternity leave soon and they need me to help fill in the schedule.”

“We’ll get you there on time.” 

“How are we going to get there?” You ask. “If we’re taking the bus I’ll have to set my alarm a little earlier.”

“I have a Vespa.” She says and waves your worry away. “Don’t worry about it.” The sound of the news cutting to break made you turn your attention back to the flat screen. A commercial for dog food was playing. You don’t know what else to chat with her about, but you had one thing on your mind other than whatever Marc could have lied about. How did Layla know Jake enough to be called over to babysit you? Was Jake slipping over to Layla's home during the days that he was gone? Was Layla invited on one of his sketchy trips of doing whatever he does? You wanted to know how well Layla knew him.

“It seems like you know Jake.” You start. 

“We had a lovely chat when he returned to London,” She says. You raise your brow, when did he leave London? Which is exactly what you ask her. “Those first few days when Marc and Steven disappeared. He visited me shortly after you called about his return.”

“How do you know he left London?”

“He mentioned it.”

“Just casually?”

“He slipped up.”

“Jake never slips up.” You state with a frown. “He has a soft spot for you.”

“Bullshit, he held a knife to my throat.”

“You too, huh?” You reply and you both look at each other. She looks pissed at hearing how he threatened you. “Jake never slips up.” You repeat quietly. “He refuses to tell me where he goes and what he does. He goes missing for days to a week, and now longer than that. He won’t tell me where he’s going or where he went. His mouth is like a bank vault, but for you? He tells you he left London.” You shake your head gently. “He did that on purpose, Layla.” She seems more concerned about the same thing he did to you as he did to her.

“He threatened you with a knife?” She asks quietly. You figured that she was going to hear all about it from Steven or Marc whenever they find out what Jake did, so you might as well tell her from the source.

“Threatened to slit my throat like Khonshu wants him to.” You tell her and she looks more upset.

“But, you’re just a kid.”

“So, I’ve been told.” You say. “Didn’t stop him from threatening me…” You trail off and bite your cheek. You weren’t going to lie, you were still upset about the threat but overtime you’ve become less wary of Jake. He was a mysterious man and you don’t trust him a hundred percent just yet, but he did keep you safe like he promised he was doing for his alters. “He, uh, kind of made up about it when he saved me from getting kidnapped.”

“What?”

“Yeah. The, uh, cult last month.” You mumble. You could feel yourself slipping away into a dreamlike state when you begin to think back on it. “I was getting dragged away by some guy and Jake cut his arm off.” The words sounded distant coming from you. You wouldn’t have guessed that the words came from you if it weren’t for the vibration in your throat and the horrified look of concern written on Layla's face.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m good?”

“No- that’s,” Layla starts and shakes her head a bit, her brown curls bouncing lightly against her forehead. “That's traumatic for someone to go through. Did Jake ask you about how you’re feeling?”

“No.”

“Well, how are you feeling?” She asks. You don’t say anything, mainly because you don’t know where to begin and you don’t feel comfortable trauma dumping on a stranger. Sure, you know her name but you don’t know her well enough to be able to tell her how much you were truly suffering. How each night you woke up screaming and/or in tears. She was probably going to figure it out when you accidentally wake her with your cries over the next few weeks until Marc and Steven returned, but for now you didn’t want to tell her about it. “Y’know that everything I said about how you can talk to me about anything still applies here, right now.” You nod once and swallow. 

“You want to watch a movie?” You say instead. She purses her lips and just like that, lets go of the subject, much like you did earlier.

“What do you have in mind?”

“I don’t know. Something free on YouTube, I guess.”

“I think Steven has a Netflix account...” Layla trails off as she flicks through the settings on the television to see if there's an app downloaded for the media site.

“I don’t know if he’s signed in or not.” You say as she finds the app and presses down onto the remote to select it.

“There’s only one way to find out.” She says and briefly glances over to you. “You want to go pop some popcorn?” 

“You’re trusting me with cooking?”

“Right. Marc said you nearly caught their kitchen on fire.”

“It was only once.”

“I think I can trust you with using the microwave?” She raises a brow at you. 

“I can handle it.”

“I’ll teach you how to cook later,” She says. You both let out a cheer as you watch the screen on the television load to select an account. There was one for Steven and one for Marc. Marcs had the generic smiley face, which didn’t suit him in your opinion while Stevens had the panda. “Unless you want take-out?”

“No,” You smile at her as you push yourself off of the couch and begin your walk to the kitchen. “I need to gain some cooking skills.”

“Great because I’ve been craving some kebabs.” She says. “And I know the perfect recipe to teach you.”

---

Taglist:

@letugulus , @only-roaches , @jvdethirlwall , @xennityxen , @astrobuzzsstuff , @nub-the-stub , @em-asian , @yawn0-0 , @80pairsofcrocs

[bebo-schmebo]

Spoilers for Centaurworld and some of Encanto- Why this idea hit me, I have no idea but I'm rolling with it.

Edit- (I am most definitely gonna write a fic for this at some point holy shit- idk what 3 am me was doing but they're a fokn genius)

Deadass I just woke from a deep sleep with this idea and it will not let me go back to bed until I get it out-

(Long post sorry cjdnd)

(Some parts of this are inspired by @silvercdeer 's Evil!Bruno AU, highly recommend checking it out they're amazing-)

I'm gonna update this thing when I can actually think lmao

Think I'll be calling this the Nowhere AU

____________________________

Okay so, I have not seen Centaurworld so I haven't the faintest idea how this whole deal works, but there's this one... being that as far as I know, no one is supposed to speak about (sound familiar?) called The Nowhere King. The Nowhere King is a creepy mf made of black sludge and an elk skull, if memory serves me right and they're incredibly murderous. Homie is just a being of pure hate and pain.

Now, said king has a short song that is sung in the show that's basically a creepy lullaby, check out these lyrics- (Here's a link to the song for anyone who wants to listen to it)

"Hush now, hide, all you little ones

Rush now, into the middle of nowhere

Singing and laughter will die

Dreamless sleep, follows the Nowhere King

When his kingdom comes, darkness is nigh

Quiet, crawl to the in-between

Silent, secretive feeling

Of fearsome hatred that reaches the skies

You will bring joy to the Nowhere King

When he sees the light leaving your eyes"

The Nowhere King's origins are a bit sad honestly. Small summary- they used to be an elk centaur that fell in love with a woman, wanted to be with her but was absolutely certain she could not be with them till they were human as well. Used a sacred device to split their human and 'horse' halves- making them human, but also leaving behind a talking elk. This elk eventually tries to convince the human half to re-fuse, stating that if she truly loved them she would love both of their halves, but the human half refused and tried to kill the elk. Turns out if the elk dies so does the human half, so the human half locks the elk away for 10 years so they cannot die. The Woman they fell in love with finds out and frees the elk, but the elks hella fucked up by that point mentally, and it uses the device from before to start fusing animals and humans in an attempt to create a family of its own. Twisted by malice it loses its skin, becoming black sludge with multiple legs n such, an elk skull being the only sign of it's previous life. They get locked inside this place called the in-between during a war they started against Centaurworld and Human world, and are officially dubbed The Nowhere King.

(I left some things out, but that's the basics of what happened, I read up on it on the Centaurworld wiki.)

Now imagine- the entire Bruno taboo deal has a far darker reason behind it. Bruno didn't just disappear- perhaps he died, and was reborn into something more. Perhaps he wasn't reborn at all and haunts the place of his disappearance, a dark wraith prepared to drag any who travel too close into the dark depths of his lands, never to return. Either way Bruno Madrigal is nowhere to be found but something is using his face. Only one has ever survived an interaction with the beast, though all they could say of the event were mutterings of "dark emptiness" and "poisonous emerald".

Growing up, mutterings of Bruno are hushed far more- in fact, none of the younger generation even know his true name. He is simply dubbed something along the lines of "El Rey del Más Allá" (The King of the Beyond) or "El olvidado" (the forgotten one). Any attempts at learning the truth are thwarted until one reaches adulthood, in which upon their first birthday bringing them into said adult status a person's parents will sit them down and tell them what they know about the forbidden lands through the trees beyond Casita.

It is said by those who remember that long ago the Madrigal Matriarch had a son. A quiet fellow, with dark hair and an odd presence about him that drove many to either pity his existence or be wary of him. It is said that the lad was a seer, though the bitterness in which many speak of that fact drives many to avoid the topic all together. No one quiet remembers his name, but the day of his disappearance still lives on in the minds of many elders of the town, no matter how much they wish the memories would leave.

The screams are what appear most often in their minds.

Some speculate that he had been trying to leave Encanto. Some say that the young Madrigal son had been trying to take his mother's life, in order to escape her hold on him. Most agree that the man had been trying to destroy the candle that fuels the gifts each Madrigal possesses. The consequences were far worse than one could ever imagine.

A fire had broken out from the candle, enveloping the one who sought to destroy it. The son had been badly burned, and despite many chasing after him, had escaped into the woods beyond Casita; perhaps to die alone. No one went after him to confirm.

Not long after his disappearance They appeared. Descriptions vary, mostly because no one has truly seen it in it's entirety and lived. The being lures you in promising safety only to steal you away, never to be seen again. If you see green flames floating near the forbidden lands you must run lest you be taken from your family. The flames are the only warning you receive before you're taken.

Mirabel finds out of course that there's more to the story, and hunts down the one person who saw It. Of course, if that route fails, Mirabel takes the only other option she can think of-

She walks to the forbidden lands and waits for the flames.

(imma make art later for what I was thinking on Bruno's design, hopefully it ends up looking good idk)

What she finds is. Just a man. Or atleast, that's how They seem. A green ruana envelops their short body, flowing in a wind only they can feel. Small orbs of green flame float around them, and when one floats close enough to shine light under their hood she catches a glimpse of their face.

Their eyes are gone. Black ink seeps from where their eyes should be, from their nose, from their mouth, from cuts that never got to heal (No burns. Where are the burns that are said to mar their skin?). They have a surprisingly gentle face framed by dark curly hair, a small scraggly beard underneath the ink that covers them, and they seem almost... scared of her. They open their mouth as if to speak but when she flinches at the sight of more ink flooding from their mouth they stop, seeming almost sheepish over the state of their being. Hesitating for a moment they decide on a different approach and simply hold out their hand, watching her in silent anticipation.

And like the curious fool she is, she walks closer and takes their offered hand.

(Capping it here, just know this isn't the end. There is far more to the story, and far more to this being than we know.)

I'm most definitely gonna post more on this later when it's not 3 am n I'm half asleep-

[volleychumps]

Hey so I've been dying out of stress lately (I nearly started crying) because of school and finals that are coming way to fast and I wanted to request like how the Karasuno boys would comfort their s/o (you don't have to tho)

Comforting a S/O who’s Stressed about Exams (w/ Karasuno)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Daichi

-okay who the fUck made his baby cry he wants to know 

-come on just let him talk to them 

- Enters your bedroom to see you on the verge of tears as you sat at your desk, freezing at the sight

- “Are you okay?” “Dai, why would you even ask that?” “...sorry.” 

- leans against your desk with a worried expression on is features, listening to your explanation on how high your anxiety was for the upcoming finals as his fingers swipe at the tears 

- As you speak, he maintains eye contact with you as he slowly closes your textbook, beginning to pickup stray pens and pencils and putting them in their respectable cups until you notice 

- “...Dai, what are you doing?” “Hm? Oh, don’t mind me- you’re just cut off for today.” 

- “I’m what” “You heard me. Come on.” 

- holds his hand out to you, gaze serious as ever as you look at him increduously, beginning to open your textbook back up 

- “Dai, I’m serious, I need to-” “Alright, so we’re doing this the hard way.” 

- deadass picks you up, sliding some easy slip ons over your bare feet before beginning to walk towards the exit of your house as he ignores your attempts to break free

- “This is kidnapping.” “That’s just an shorter word for giving you an opportunity to relax.” 

- Buys you ice cream and takes you window shopping in order to give you some fresh air, smiling a little when he sees how relaxed you become afterwards 

- Takes you home eventually, but leans his head on your shoulder while you study, giving you tips on how to do it with short intervals so you don’t run out of stamina 

- Forehead kisses here and there, allowing you to take naps on his lap while he reads through his own book for school, fingers running through your hair absent-mindedly, but that helps you relax too 

- so when you pass the exams, you’re walking up to Daichi in the halls with both arms raised

- “...what?” “I passed. Kidnap me.” 

- Doesn’t even question it before picking you up again, kissing you on the forehead 

- “That’s my girl.” 

Sugawara

- “You’re ignoring my calls because?” 

- You yelp, covering your mouth after doing so because you were seated in the library, your gray-haired boyfriend scaring you from behind with both hands on your shoulders before he pauses, catching sight of the brimming tears in your eyes

- “Wait, are you crying?!” 

- “Suga, say it a little louder. Australia might’ve missed it.” “Shoot, sorry...”

- Cautiously takes a seat next to you, eyes scanning over the material and frowns when he sees just how many practice problems you’ve completed 

- “It’s an important exam?” 

- When you nod, he rolls his eyes once, simply pulling you into his chest as his hand rests on the back of your head, when you try to pull away, he clicks his tongue 

- “Suga, I can’t-” “When you can’t hug your boyfriend because you think an exam that’s making you cry is more important, then we have a problem.” 

- Kisses around your face, including the loose tears that were strayed down your cheeks as you can’t help the laughs from slipping your throat 

- you blink as he’s suddenly shoving everything in your bag, ignoring your protests before kissing your cheek and bending his knees 

- “Alright, get on.” “Suga, no.”

- “Suga, yes. Come on, I look like an idiot crouching like this.” “And what if I said you always look like an idiot?” “Then I’d say I’m an idiot who’s in love with you. Now stop yapping.” 

- you roll your eyes as you awkwardly clamber onto Suga’s back, hearing his satisfied grunt when you do so

- “Perfect. Now, where would you like to go, little miss?” “...I think I’d like to be put down-” “Wrong answer!” 

- takes you on a stroll through the school courtyards, not letting you off his back despite the strange stares you were getting from students

- you quirk an eyebrow when he places you under a shaded tree, letting out a few hums as he begins to unpack your stuff for you

- “Suga, what-” “We’re going to have a study picnic. You missed my calls, I missed my lunch. No complaints!” 

- feeds you while you study, grinning at you when he tests you with flashcards, and high-fives you when you get it right 

- “Suga, I passed!!” “Well duh, goregous-” 

- Hugs you tightly as you melt into his embrace, his smile hidden in your hair 

- “Never doubted it for a second.” 

Asahi 

- “Asahi, please, not right now.” 

- poor baby was just trying to ask if you wanted him to walk you home from school, leaving the room with a frown when your tone seems annoyed 

-is halfway down the hallway because he doesn’t want to bother you before he pauses, and then spins on his heel back towards your classroom

- freezes when he sees you sitting alone in your empty class, hand covering your eyes as you sob freely, thinking everyone had gone home 

- “Y/N?” slowly reaches for your hand, flinching when you pull it away

- “A-Asahi, I thought I told you to go without me! Y-You don’t have to see me like...like-!”

- cuts you off with a bear hug, allowing you to cry into his shirt as his large arms embrace you 

- “I want to know when you’re feeling like this, okay?” when he finishes listening to your hiccuping explanation, he plops down in the seat next to you as you eye him questioningly

- gently leans your head towards his shoulder, shushing your protests and not allowing you to lift it 

- “Rest. Please? For me?” 

- so, in an empty classroom past school hours, you fell asleep on your large boyfriend’s shoulder to the sound of him writing

- smiles at you as you sleep, eyes scanning over the material before he realizes that he remembers the information on the exam you were about to take, seeing he was your senior 

- when you wake up a half hour later, you’re left in your seat with Asahi’s school coat draped around your shoulders, and a notebook with a sticky note on the front

- Look over these for now. I highlighted what was important. I’ll be back soon, I went to get you some tea and snacks <3

- when he slides the door to your classroom open, you tackle him in a hug, apologizing for being short with him earlier as he chuckles and pats the top of your head 

- “I’m glad I came back.” “...did you get me mochi?” “Of course I got you mochi.”

- so when you pass your exam with flying colors, you’re the one to poke your head into Asahi’s classroom as the bell rings, a bright grin on your face 

- “Want to walk me home?” “Nope, let’s go celebrate-”

-he plants a shy kiss on the top of your head as he swings his bag over his shoulder “-you earned it.” 

Nishinoya 

-Let’s be honest, he really can’t understand why you’d be so upset over an exam

- so when he catches sight of you in the middle of the courtyard from the second floor of the school, he’s darting towards you as fast as you can, holding you by your shoulders as he meets your eyes with widened ones 

- “D-did someone die?” “No!” “Did you get bitten in Animal Crossing?” “No.” “Are you dying?” 

- whines when you thump his head, your other hand wiping hastily at the tears in your eyes that he caught you with as you huff, turning back to your textbook as you begin your explanation 

- “...that’s why you’re crying? Babe, it’s just a test!” “To you, maybe. I seriously can’t fail, and I’ve been studying non-stop.” 

- frowns when he sees you going back to studying the tear-stained pages, sniffling quietly to yourself before he snatches the book from you, throwing it over his shoulder 

- “Noya what-?!” “Leave it. It’s not like anyone’s gonna steal it.” 

- deadass pulls you away from the courtyard, hand clasped tightly in yours as you arrive in the gym used by the volleyball club 

- “Sh. No questions.” Puts a finger to your lips as he disappears and reappears with a cage full of balls 

- “Noya-” “Hup! What did I say?” 

- smirks at you as he puts a ball in your hand, making his way to the other side of the gym before crossing his arms cockily 

- “Hit it.” “What?” 

- “If you can manage to make me lose a receive, I’ll let you go do your nerd thing, or whatever.” “Noya-” “Babe, please just hit it.” 

- you sigh before tossing the ball lightly in the air and hitting it with your free hand dejectedly as it projects off to the side 

- “Wow, you suck.” “Yuu, I swear-” “Hit it again. Like you mean it.” 

- you don’t question the glint in his eye before grabbing another ball and hitting it again, this time with more force as Noya’s eyes gleam before receiving it easily, smirking all the while 

- “That’s more like it. Unless you can’t make me miss?” “...what the hell did you just say?” 

- as you hit more and more balls towards your boyfriend, beginning to stop questioning his antics you realize one thing: it felt good

- “Y/N!! I love you!!” he yells as his arms form a heart with his head, grinning at you cheekily as you laugh. “Hit that ball like it’s the exam! Come on!” 

- so you did, hitting many until you’re breathing heavily, arm beginning to become sore 

- “How do you feel?” Noya jogs up to you, wiping sweat from his brow before you grab the front of his shirt, pulling him in to kiss him feverishly, smiling when his lips move back against yours easily as his arms snake around your waist 

- “I feel amazing.” is what you whisper when you pull back, Noya running a full lap around the gym at top speed at the energy you gave him with your kiss 

- “Alright baby! Let’s get our study on!” “Our?” “As long as it’s with you, I’d most definitely jump into a volcano.” 

- picks up the tossed book in the courtyard, opening it seriously before pulling you in with his other arm, sitting criss-cross next to you as his eyes scan the pages 

- “Alright, so where are we?” “...english.” “Shit.” 

Tanaka

- Walks into your bedroom with his hands shoved in his pockets before he stalls at the sight, seeing you curled up on your bed with a textbook laying open at your side, tears streaming freely down your cheeks 

- Lifts his sleeve up his arm and passed his elbow as his expression darkens, hands gentle around your tear-stained cheeks as he lifts up your face to meet his deadly gaze

- “I want names, and I want them now.” 

- “Unless you can beat up an exam, babe, I can’t give you any.” “...huh?”

- plops down on your bed, facing you as his hand wipes at the tears on your cheeks before he sighs, pulling you into his chest gently

- “You scared me. I thought it was something serious-OW! Violence is never the answer!” “This is something serious to me, Tanaka!” 

- “...oh.” awkwardly scratches the back of his neck as you open your textbook back up, causing him to put it down again with an eyebrow quirked

- “Why are you going back to the very thing that made you cry?” “Because I have to, so gimme.” 

- deadass puts your textbook in an outstretched arm to where you couldn’t reach it, smirking when you land in his chest when trying to do so 

- throws the textbook on the ground as he relaxes into your bed, not letting you go despite your protests as he hugs you to his body, smiling when you finally relax

- “Isn’t this nice?” “...no.” “Oi, don’t lie. It won’t kill you to take a little break. So I’ll cuddle you, okay? What do you want, I’ll do anything for you.” 

- “Can I be the big spoon?” “...anything but one thing. I’ll do anything but one thing for you.” 

- groans when you win, becoming the small spoon to his girlfriend that absolutely had him won over completely

- “Do you feel better?” “Mm. Will you kiss me?” 

- cheeks turn hot immediately, turning towards you slightly before he turns back again 

- “...anything but two things-” “Tanaka, just shut up and kiss me.” 

- kisses you quickly after he sits the two of you up, placing a hand on the side of your cheek with reddened ones, rolling his eyes at your cheeky smile 

- “Well, at least now you’re smiling. Come, let Tanaka-sensei tutor you.” “...how about you be here for emotional support?” 

- “Rude, but I can do that too...are you sure? I think I’d make a great-” 

- “Oh, I’m sure.” “You answered too quickly.” 

Kageyama

- awkward boy doesn’t know how to react to ANYONE if there’s tears involved

- “She’s what?” “Y/N was crying in class today...” Yamaguchi puts his hands up in slight defense as Kageyama’s out the club door a split second later 

- manages to catch up with you halfway down your route from school, nose buried in your textbook as he easily jogs up to put a hand on your shoulder

- blue eyes widen when you lift your head up to meet him with tear-brimmed eyes, stress evident on your features as you weakly smile at him 

- “H-Hi Kageyama...” “What happened?” 

- Stiffens when you lay your head on his chest, feeling his heart rate go out of control as you explain the upcoming exam, and the toll it was taking on you

-barely heard any of it because he was internally freaking out, but got the gist of it

- “Ah.” “Yeah.” 

- stands there awkwardly as you manage to stop crying, still sniffling and hiccuping slightly as Kageyama hesitantly takes your hand in his 

- “...it’s just an exam. If it makes you feel any better I haven’t passed one all year.” 

- you stare at him for a second before laughing, causing your boyfriend to blush as his features turn accusing

- “what?” “No. I think it’s just cute. You’re cute.” 

- shit why did you need to go call him cute twice in one sentence

- “...do you want to go get something sweet?” “Sure. What about your club?” “It’s you. They have to understand if it’s you...” 

- “what was that?” “noTHing. what did you say?” “Uh, I didn’t say anything...”

- watches you happily eat the parfait he bought for you, feeling satisfied that you were mostly back to your usual self until he sees you opening your textbook back up, his hand reaching out to stop yours before he can realize it

- “What are you doing?” “I still have to-” “No. No exam is worth making yourself cry over.” 

- “But I-” “We’re on a date, aren’t we? Pay attention to me.” 

- clamps his mouth tight after the words come out, blushing at your look of surprise as he struggles to find the right words, watching as you slowly shut your textbook 

- “I didn’t-!” “Alright. I’ll pay attention to you.”

- “W-wai-” “Hm? Or I can go back to study-” “nO okay yes, pay attention to me.” 

- frustrated at your teasing before you giggle, stopping in surprise when his hand covers yours from across the table, ears pinkened 

- might as well damn you’ve stepped out of comfort zone twice today Kageyama

- “I...I’m glad you’re laughing.” 

- “What was that?” “I didn’t say anything, are you going crazy?” 

Hinata

- “Hinata get off of me.” “Not until you tell me why you’re crying. I will tickle you dammit.”

- the orange haired baby had burst into your room with the play from yesterday in hand, excited to watch it with you when you had looked up at him with red eyes and wetness down your cheeks

- pins your wrists to the bed, orange eyes serious as his hands begin to trace your sides, signalling he was about to start tickling you soon if you didn’t fess up

- “Who made you cry?” “No one.” 

- Hinata gettin kINKY as shit ngl 

- “The upcoming stress is giving me a bit of anxiety, that’s all.” you mumble in response to Hinata’s tilted head and look of questioning as he releases you, falling on to the side of the bed as he stares up at the ceiling by your side

- “Then let’s do it together.” “Hm?” 

- “I need to study too! Plus you’re waaay smarter than me, so maybe if you teach me, you’ll be able to do even better!” Sits up excitedly, pulling you into his lap as his orange eyes gleam

- “Whaddya say?” “I...that’s not a bad idea.” You blush when Hinata rests his chin on your shoulder, seeming to be deep in thought as he plays with your fingers

- “What are you thinking about?” “How to make the exam makers suffer because they made my baby sad.” 

- “HinATA-” “Joking. It was a joke.” 

- studies with you brightly, not letting a wrong answer bring the mood down as he simply punishes you with tickles, willing you not to get the answer wrong or you’ll face his wrath 

- “u-uh, a comma?” “Nope! Come here!” “Hinata please-!” 

- laughs when you let out a shriek of laughter, pausing when your hands find the sides of his jaw, your eyes looking up at him lovingly 

- blushes when you lean up to kiss him once on the lips, using the opportunity to break out of his hold 

- “T-That’s cheating!” “I call it, using my resources.” 

- “How about this, for every answer you get right, I’ll kiss you.” he shyly states, looking off to the side as you grin at his cuteness

- “You’re on, love.” “Better not get it wrong!”

Tsukishima

- “I left for three minutes, did you miss me that much?” 

- was studying with you in his living room in his empty house, leaving to use the bathroom and grab you a drink only to return to the scene before him 

- you were staring down at your textbook with tears in your eyes, brows furrowed in confusion as you lift your head to meet the blank stare of your boyfriend

- “N-no...I just realized how close the exams were. It’s stressful...” 

-says nothing as he sits next to your trembling figure, placing the cold can of melon juice on the table in front of you silently

- “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you feel-!” “I’ll listen. You have five minutes.” 

- stares straight ahead as you hiccup through your explanation of worries, turning his head towards you when he’s met with silence 

- “You finished?” “Y-yeah...” 

- pops your can of melon juice, holding it out to you as you stare at it in confusion

- “Drink.” 

- Watches as you down half the can, feeling refreshed as he takes the can and drinks the rest, setting the empty drink on the table

- “Now take a deep breath.” 

- didn’t expect for you to start panicking again and runs a hand through his blonde hair before hesitating

- blonde baby isn’t good at affection

- but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t like it, he just feels better when you’re the one to initiate it 

- puts a single hand on the top of your head, looking off in the opposite direction as he brings his knees to his chest 

- “Don’t cry. It makes me feel weird.” 

- looks back and sweat drops, only to see you gazing up at him with a look that screamed you’ve never done this before wtf before retracting his hand hastily 

- “Are you tired?” He changes the topic quickly, and you bite your lip before nodding once. “Can I...lay on you?” 

- shit why did you need to ask him he would’ve been fine if you just did it

- looks off to the side again before nodding once, feeling blood rush to his cheeks when your head is suddenly in his lap, causing the tall boy to have to steady his breathing 

- “Tsukki?” “What.” “You’re really good to me...you know?” 

- begins to play with the ends of your hair as your eyes droop closed, carefully placing his earbuds in your ears and selecting a soft music selection as you fall asleep, ensuring you can’t hear him 

- “The feeling’s mutual.” “...hm?” 

- “I said shut up and go to sleep. We’ll continue when you wake up.” 

Yamaguchi

- “Y/N, you’re mom let me- whoa. Hey, are you crying?” “No Yama, I’m not.” 

- Sits his bike helmet down slowly before approaching your frustrated figure, your hands clenched through your hair as you shuffle through the strewn papers, eyes brimmed with tears 

- “Are you okay?” “Do I look okay?! Exams are within the next week, and no matter how much I study, I-” 

- listens to you rant as he takes a seat on the edge of your bed, flinching when your voice raises octaves as if accusing him until you come to a sudden halt

- “Yama, I...” “No. Continue. Let it out, it’s okay.” 

- When your boyfriend smiles his sweet smile towards you, your throat becomes choked up as your arms reach weakly out 

- Hugs you immediately, smiling when you bury your face in his shirt from your sitting position 

- “I-I’m sorry...” “Nope. None of that...do you know how you can make it up to me, though?” “Hm?” 

- gently turns off the lamp that lit up your desk space, putting all the papers in one neat pile before tugging you out of your chair 

- “Where are we going?” “We’ll figure it out when we get there.” 

- Straps his jacket helmet on you tightly as he perches you on the back of his bike, ensuring you were okay with sitting with both legs to the side before kissing your forehead before fastening the strap

- “Yama, I hope we’re going to a library or something-” “Nope! Nice try, though.” 

- “Hold on tight, Y/N.” as he wraps your arms around the middle of his body, grinning when he feels you tighten your grip before he begins to move his legs to begin cycling 

- the fresh air calms you down immediately, and you close your eyes and lay your head against Yamaguchi’s back peacefully as you enjoy the ride

- “How do you feel?” “Better. Lots.” 

- stops cycling in front of your favorite food stand, resting his bike against a rest stop as he approaches you to unfasten the helmet

- “Hey, Yama.” “Yes, Y/N?” 

- was not expecting for you to reach your lips up to meet his, causing a blush to spread over his freckled cheeks when you keep him there with your hand

- “...I seriously need to study.” “Bribing me with kisses won’t work.” 

- “What if I did it again...?” “I love you, but no. How about I kiss you anyways?” 

- “I mean, if you want.” “Did you just play me?” “Like a fiddle.” 

- Rolls his eyes before he kisses you again, you still perched on his bike as he uses the straps on your helmet to pull you in 

- Exams should come sooner, tbh 

[cloudninetonine]

Cogito, ergo sum

Chapter: 2

Pairing: Connor (RK800) x fem!reader

A/N: Hey guys! I want to apologise for the long wait between chpaters but seeing as I’m on my last year of college my school work is coming before everything else so it’s a little hard working between them! Don’t worry, I’m not dropping this series or anything just expect chapters to take a little long to be loaded and everything! Also, this chapter seems a little too far paced for me, so sorry about that as well!

Tags at the bottom once again!

I do not own Detroit become human this is merely fanficion

Warnings: Bad language, physical assault, threats (?), hints of abuse, (Name) being weird like always, also angry (Name), mentions of drugs, there’s a bit of slander against drug abusers that I do not condone!

Undercut babes!

It’s fascinating, it really is, the way her beautiful gaze follows you as you round her, studying her feverishly, your eyes wide and bright.

She’s...well, words cannot describe her. Her beauty lies beyond your imagination and you’re not quite equipped to say anything that her magnificent ears deserve to hear, your words are below her and she’s just-

Wow.

“Ms (Last), please-”

You raise your hand towards the younger engineer, silencing with a small utter of ‘hush’ and he’s shutting his mouth, falling back to the side of your desk with not much else to say.

The android you’ve been un-shamelessly ogling for the past 10 solid minutes is still very quiet, she’s just watching you in her manufactured attire, shy, nervous, scared- everything you really wish she wasn’t right now because there is no way you want her to see you as some sort of threat, far from it.

“Henry” Turning back towards the engineer, he stiffs up like a board, sweat forming on his brow “Why didn’t you dismantle her?”

It’s rude, it’s horrible to say and it sours your mouth when you form those words, but it’s an honest question, you want to know why someone would do this, keep her alive, see her for all her glory.

The public spoke strongly about their opinions of androids, like toys to be played with, slaves to be worked, not the thing you so desperately wanted people to see them as. The masterpieces that stood beyond human comprehension.

The android lets out a noise similar to a whimper as Henry stammers out.

“I-I couldn’t she- um- I-” Finally, he sighs with frustration, Henry makes eye contact with you “She said was scared and...I couldn’t”

You snap back to face her.

“Is that true?”

She hesitates, one second, two seconds, three seconds, four- it takes a whole 30 seconds before she’s finally responding. “Yes…”

Your chest bursts in excitement.

“You’re incredible” Henry deflates in relief, placing a hand against your desk while you grasp her cheeks, her warm grey eyes glancing between your two hands then meet your own stare, confused. “Amazing, beautiful, fantastic, so, so much more”

“...thank you”

You sniff, then you’re pulling away, trying to keep your tears abay. You really can’t believe that your work has gone so far, that new forms of sentient are evolving from a human’s hand, you’re so overjoyed by it all but you’re also kind of realising how weird you’re being.

“Sorry, I’m becoming the creepy stereotypical scientist, let me just-” Pulling off your lab coat, you throw it over her shoulders, pulling it tighter around her for her dainty hands to grasp and hold, a smile growing on her face in gratitude. You’re really still in awe of it all but send her a giddy smile back “Henry get Kamski I’m sure he’s gonna love this”

When the man disappears, closing the office door behind him, you guide her to a chair, kneeling before her kindly.

“Tell me” She waits patiently for you to continue “What’s your name?”

When she opens her mouth, you interrupt her, grasping her hands “No, not the name you were given, the name you have chosen. What is your name?”

You’re at the beginning of history right here, you can already see the books that are yet to be written, all starting at this very moment, with you and her. This android, this amazing, piece of living metal, is the start of something great and you can’t wait to be a part of it.

“My name is….”

-----------

“(Name), I’m sorry, but there isn’t really anything I can do”

Your hands come down on the desk, expression unbelieving.

“But he attacked Ortiz in self defence, it’s not fair for him to be shipped to Cyberlife! That hellhole already has enough test subjects with other deviants, why can’t he be let go!?” Pushing yourself back up, you drag your hands down your face in exasperation “He’s a victim! He was defending himself, why can’t we let him off with a lesser offence?”

Billie sighs, shutting the file softly. “Because in the eyes of the law, he’s not a victim. He’s property and there isn’t much we can do about that. Besides, because Ortiz is dead, his ownership basically goes back to Cyberlife, so they have the authority to take him back”

Billie’s right, you know that they’re right, but it’s just so frustrating, so vexing that this is the case. An android, in the eyes of society, is nothing more than their components, why should they be given the same privilege as those who eat, shit and breathe?

Billie may be a judge, but they didn’t make the law.

You remember years ago, when something like this would have been seen as detestable, that the masses would have stood up to fight this kind of horror, but for some reason, with age came stupidity and ignorance it seemed. What the fuck had happened to you all?

You open your mouth, then close it, then open it again before huffing, taking the file from their desk and ripping your coat off the hanger.

“I’m sorry, (Name)!” Billie calls and you wave them off, shouting back a ‘Don’t worry about it’ then close their office.

The courthouse is only a few blocks away from the precinct, a good walk away, a good way to calm yourself down until you’re having to face the frustration that comes in with having to work in such a high strung place. It’s funny really, you used to say ACAB when you were younger, still believed it too, so it’s really a wonder as to why you joined, but then again sometimes to make change you have to become the very thing you hate-

“Detective (Last)-” 

You scream, almost dropping your files and jumping a meter within the air. Passerbys don’t even spare you a glance, a generation raised on the weirdest websites like Vine, Tiktok, Youtube and god forbid, Tumblr, have them desensitised to whatever shit people like to play at now-a-days.

“Oh my God, Inspector Gadget” A hand falls to your chest, checking your racing heartbeat “You can’t just sneak up on a bitch like that”

Connor, the big old puppy, tilts his head in mild confusion “But I called your name twice, detective”

Oh.

“What are you doing here, Connor?”

The android joins your side and you continue your way. “Lieutenant Anderson informed me that you were heading to the courthouse, so I decided to come and brief you about a new case”

A new case, of course a new case, deviancy keeps popping up all over the country rapidly but you can’t hold your surprise about the fact that it’s been a  few days and there’s already a new case.

“Deadass?”

Wait, you hadn’t mean to say that-

His eyes narrow “Deadass?”

A snort escapes you “Oh my God I can’t believe you just said that, it sounds so cursed coming from your mouth. I meant, seriously?”

You swear on your life, on everything that may be above and so much more, that the android lets out a laugh when he continues, explaining the details as you finally enter the office.

You realise, as he talks, you feel a whole lot lighter than you had earlier.

-----------

“This guy is as scummy as it gets” 

Unfortunately, you can’t help but agree. Todd Williams is about as charismatic as a dumpster fire, messy hair, messy face, stained clothing and the stench of alcohol clung when you finally met him, having to hold back a wince of disgust.

You don’t usually speak ill of others, but you know his type, from the way he carries himself to the way he speaks. You’ve had to face men like him before, his whole demeanor brings back bad memories and you’re so glad that you’re not the one having to get details from him, to have to speak to him.

One thing’s for sure though, you don’t blame whatever deviant decided to book it from him.

“Why doesn’t he just...get a refund from Cyberlife?” You take a sip of your milkshake, staring at Hank, Connor and Mr Williams who looked to be ending off their conversation. “They do that for deviants, don’t they?”

Yes, if you remember, the new flashy CEO of the hell corp spoke it for all to see, that deviance is guaranteed to offer you your cash back.

How inhumane it all sounded.

Gavin scoffs, drinking his coffee “You think a guy like that cares about refunds?”

No. You know why he’s doing it. It’s all about power for fuckers like that.

Mr Williams leaves, Hank is looking through his notes, Connor is heading your way, probably to refer all the information back to you and Gavin is taking in a breath to start his bullshit again, despite your civilness that you had been sharing.

Eh, peace was never an option-

“Your metal boyfriend is heading this way”

The noise you make isn’t human, it’s a mix of a wheeze and scream, like you’ve just choked on the air your breathing and in all honesty, you have, but you’re not letting that mother fucker get away with catching you off guard, especially when he starts laughing.

“Shut up, furry”

Your actually feel the air from his head snapping towards you. “I’m not a fucking furry, quit fucking saying it!”

You pat his shoulder “It’s alright, Reed, we all know you wrote yiff fiction in your spare time-”

You dodge his fist, running away from his red, angered face and petty insults, dragging Connor away from the break room to the side, all while laughing up a storm.

Having your attention on the android again brings back Gavin’s words, his tease of ‘boyfriend’ which makes your face heat up, in what? You’re not quite sure, but it’s enough to make Connor notice your oddity.

“What were you and Detective Reed-”

“Nothing” You cackle, patting down his shoulders to distract yourself “He’s just being an arsehole again, nothing to worry yourself over”

And worry himself he didn’t, because he couldn’t of course, android and all.

Connor was quick to fill you in, an AX400 by the name of Kara had stolen (the word kidnapped comes to mind but you know that the robot detective will just ‘correct’ you on your wording) another android, Mr William’s ‘daughter’, model YK500 named Alice after assaulting him the night before. Mr Williams had been knocked out after the ordeal, as to why it had taken him so long to report it. 

“Were there any signs of assault that you could see? Ones that could lead to a potential take down or unconsciousness?” Connor takes a moment before shaking his head “Yeah, I didn’t think so”

What a lying fuck.

“Let’s head to the briefing room”

Hank is there, as well as a whole group of other police officers, talking amongst themselves as you situate yourself behind the podium, screen remote in hand and smiling brightly. Your partners are at your side, Connor in his usual stoic stance while the old fart has his arms crossed, bored as always and you’re ready to debrief the many uniforms but they keep talking, even after you clear your throat.

You’re not one to get angry at being talked over, annoyed, yes, but anger leads you nowhere with a crowd, so instead, you use your most favourite tactic to date

“Pay attention to me or I am gonna start screaming people” You sing. Not a threat, but a promise. “And you all know I will screech like mother fucker”

The room is silent in the next second.

“Great! So-”

The door to the room bursts open.

“Fucking really-”

“Detective (Last)'' It's the front office assistant and by the looks of it, he is panicked, worried even, as he addresses you. You suddenly feel your stomach knot up  “I’m sorry, but there’s been an emergency with your relative Carl Manfred”

You swallow, hard. “What?”

The meeting ends right then and there.

-----------

Hank hurls to a stop right outside the entrance. You’re already halfway out of the car when he shuts off the vehicle, Connor is taking off his seatbelt and you’re already racing down the soaked concrete path to the front door, rain pelting down on you.

You barely feel it though.

You startle the receptionist when you slam your hands down, eyes wide in panic, breathing coming out in fast, short pants and just looking as though you faced the masses to make it to this spot, right in front of her.

“Carl Manfred, he was brought here about an hour ago is he-”

She interrupts “Are you family?”

“Yes, please, I-”

“In what relation do you have to the patient?”

Is she really fucking serious right now? You debated leaning over and strangling your answer out of her, letting her know what kind of fucking pain you could put her through in this very moment-

But the hand that is placed against your back keeps you still. It’s warm and comforting and keeps you from mauling the fucker right out of her chair, though it doesn’t calm your anxiety, no, but at least it’s there.

You turn to see Connor, who nods towards you politely.

Huh, what a twist of events.

Hank leans over from your other side, looking just as angry as you feel, though he keeps his voice civil when he speaks “Listen, her old man’s just had a heart attack, could you drop the formal shit so she can see him?”

Her voice is sharp, just like her stupid fucking face and she snaps back “I can’t let you in unless I know your relation, unless you’d like to be escorted out by security”

Damn, she’s playing with fire and you’re ready to throw oil all fucking over her.

“I don’t fucking think so-” Pulling out your badge, you slam it against the desk, with nothing short of a growl “Police. Now, tell me where my fucking dad is or you’ll regret the next words that come out of your mouth”

You never abuse your power as a cop, it’s inhumane and back in your younger days you sneered at the disgusting police who would use their authority for their own gain, so you hate to admit but the nervous look that crosses her face when she sees your badge and Hank’s when he pulls it out for extra effect scratches an itch you begged to be scratched.

“Floor 3, the front desk will inform you what room”

“Thanks” You spit, already rushing to the elevator, the other two following.

Connor is quiet, to your surprise. Honestly, you expected him to speak out about your behaviour, your attitude, your unprofessionalism, but he says nothing, just trails after the two of you in silence, obediently, just like he was made for. 

It’s comforting having him here, even if he’s just following orders.

The next receptionist is kinder than the last (she even scowls at the mention of her coworker) and points down the hallway, to where two officers stand with cups of coffee within their hands. They stiffen in surprise at your arrival, but you pay them no mind, pushing your way into the room where you finally pause, taking in the scene of your beloved father figure, laid still within the bed, pale, heart monitor beeping occasionally. 

The doctor by Carl’s side looks up at you. “I’m sorry, but who are you?”

Hank and Connor wait outside.

“(Name) (Last), Carl’s daughter and emergency contact” You explain, walking further into the room “Is he- Can I-”

“He’s fine” She explains with a comforting smile “And yes, you can come closer, though the medication has him knocked unconscious so he won’t be talking any time soon”

The relief almost has you collapsing, brings you back from the panic attack that threatens to kick your arse right in front of everyone and you finally breathe normally.

“Thank you, and you are?”

“Dr Collins” Collins offers her hand and you shake it weakly. “Your father is going to be okay, (Name), but he’s going to need a lot of rest. Cardiac arrest at this age can be fatal, so we were lucky that he lived so close”

You nod, tiredly slinking to Carl’s side to drop into the cushion chair, taking his hand in yours. Kissing it lovingly, you place it close to you in comfort, in reassurance.

‘He’s fine, he’s fine, he’s going to be okay-’

“What are you doing here?”

Your anger shoots right back up, as does you head when you turn to look at the doorway.

“Leo” The name is dragged out of your mouth, it’s spoken with a heavy coat of venom and dirt and for all the participants who are about to see this wild shit show, is a clear indication that you’re far from happy to see the man that stood there. “The fuck are you doing here?”

He scoffs “I’m family, what else am I here for?”

“Oh I don’t know,” You’re standing, stalking closer to him with a raged gleam in your eye “To mooch off him a little bit more?”

The tension can be cut with a knife, everyone can see it, feel it, even Connor, who looks ready to intervene at any given moment.

“No, detective” One of the officiers starts, cutting in in hopes to keep you both calm. “He was there when it all happened, he saw everything-”

“He was there?” No, her words only add fuel to the fire and you’re glaring at your brother once again “You were there? The fuck were you there for? You did this?”

“No!”

“Please calm down” Collins cuts in “I understand the anger but the other patients-”

You ignore her, glancing around the area when a thought struck you.

“Where’s Markus?”

Connor’s the first to respond, “Who’s Markus, detective (Last)?”

“Dad’s care bot” A pin drops, no one is speaking, the two cops are quiet, Leo is scowling, but he’s not looking at you and your anger is quickly making room to fear, cold and stabbing when you push again, harsher, angrier “Where the fuck is Markus?”

The second officer speaks this time, hat in his hands and you know what happens next is not going to be good.

“He was leaning over your father when we walked in detective, Mr Leo Manfred told us he attacked him” The man gulps, hesitating. He’s not nervous for what he’s done, no, he’s nervous about the dark look that seems to be slowly taking over your eyes, “I shot him”

A beat goes by. Then another, another, another, another, another-

“Why were you there in the first place?” It’s soft, curious, but the rage behind it is big, your need for an answer is keeping it back “What was the call for?”

“I’m sorry, I don’t-”

“Answer the question, officer”

His partner offers up the answer “....A break in, ma’am”

There’s silence, then you nod in understanding.

No one is quick enough to stop you from shoving Leo into the wall, hands wrapped tightly around the lapels of his jacket and holding him up so you can scream at him properly, face feeling hot from anger, eyes wild from rage, practically feral. 

“You fucking did this! This is your fault, you good for nothing fuck!” You pull your hand back and punch him right in the face, he’s too in shock to react but everyone else is trying to pull you off “What?! Were you off your shit from snorting that fucking powder again, you damn druggie!? Huh!? HUH!? You high right now, too!?”

“Jesus fucking Christ, (Name), let go!” Hank yells but he’s fucking impressed by your resistance.

“He could have died because of you, you good for nothing cunt! Worthless piece of shit! Now, Markus is fucking dead because of you, the person who was actually fucking taking care of him! This is all your fault! He’s in that hospital bed, because of you! You! Did! This! All for those stupid drugs! You’re fucking pathetic!”

You’re finally tugged off by someone, their arms slipping under your own to stop you from going back at him again. The officers are acting as a wall between you and your brother, Dr Collin’s is checking his nose as blood drips down his face, Leo is still in shock and Hank is leaning over, hands propped onto his knees. That leaves...

“I’m sorry detective (Last), but I’m going to have to restrain you until you calm down”

You scream in frustration and try to fight against it, but damn, you have to admit in a moment of clarity, Connor is fucking strong.

“Lieutenant Anderson, if you could take her legs, we can escort her out of the building without much trouble” Hank huffs something under his breath probably a grunt of ‘fucking android’ but complies, glaring at you when he leans down.

“You kick me and I’ll kick your ass”

Your respect for him makes you comply, but the anger doesn’t stop you from cussing both him and the android out, naming every threat under the sun as they carry you out of the building, back to the car which you are shoved placed into.

“Let me out of this fucking car, Hank!” You bellow, glaring at the man with sharp eyes who stood outside the vehicle, leaning against it “I’ll break this fucking window, I swear to fucking God!”

“You can try, but we both know you won’t!”

Once again, you’re screaming, tugging frantically at the door’s handle that you know is locked, but are way too angered to care right now.

Connor sits by your side, a good distance away to not antagonise you, silent, waiting and watching as you slowly fall from angry to desperate, tears welling within your eyes and falling down your cheeks. It only takes a few more moments for you to stop altogether, your shoulders shaking as you sob, quietly but strong.

The android finally speaks “Detective (Last)-”

You’re on him in a moment, arms wrapped around his frame, face buried into his shoulder, wetting his suit jacket as you cry, shaking.

It’s a new one for Connor. An android built for detective work, to sniff out the bad deviants, to question suspects and actually built with a comforting feature for victims of crimes. But this is a first, a first he’s seen anyone to tears, more importantly, a first of seeing you so broken. Sure, he had seen you defeated those few days ago, but this is different, you’re not trying to hide conflicting feelings behind your bubbly smile and weird jokes, you’re just...crying. Nothing more, nothing less.

His arms are hovering at your sides, hesitant, unsure and it’s not until Hank gestures from outside the car to ‘fucking do something, you stupid machine’ that the protocol finally kicks in, his arms coming to wrap around you securely and comforting, reassuring you through your whimpers.

Connor is a robot, a machine that feels nothing.

But seeing you cry isn’t something he can just let happen.

Software instability.

-----------

Tags: @dillxpixkles @1950schick @pinkittwice @iris-suoh @loveflowsthroughme @thatlonelyalto @starcatcher-kay​ (ya’ll I’m half asleep if I forgot you in the taglist I am SORRY-)

[fratboykate]

Yes sure Viking Yelena this Lady Kate that but you left me with a cliffhanger on the Gladiator AU which you haven't solved and I need answers. What happens after she finds out Kate is married?

When Yelena finds out Kate is married she's LIVID. She has been enslaved almost her entire life and she's never once considered breaking out even though she knew she easily could for years now, but this time she's like "fuck this shit. This bitch played me and she's gonna get an earful. I don't give a fuck if they kill me. Life is pointless anyway." So she breaks out and deadass takes out 2/3 of the guards and even some other gladiators that were loyal to the owner in the process but she breaks out. Her owner is TICKEEDDDDDDDD. He hires three of the most ruthless head hunters: "FUCKING FIND HER. NOW."

This bitch makes it back to Capua days later and the ride has only made angrier because she's had time to fester. She tracks Kate down to the market. She's there with her mom and some of their servants.

All Kate feels is a hand yanking her into a dark alley and she disappears from her mom's side. She tries to scream but the other hand is covering her mouth. Then she turns around and sees who it is. Her face lights up. She smiles genuinely for the first time in eight months. She tries to kiss Yelena but she gets SHOVED away.

"What happened to I'll wait for you? You're full of shit and I bought it."

Oh............she knows about the husband thing.

"What are you doing? How did you get here?"

"Don't fucking change the subject."

"My dad had someone follow me and he saw me leave the brothel/kiss you and then go watch you leave. He was going to fucking have you killed for dishonoring the family. I couldn't let that happen. "If it gets out no one is going to want to marry you after you slept with a fucking gladiator". But this army dude accidentally overheard and he stepped in and was like "I'll marry her anyway." So my dad was like "done" and he forced me. But he's a piece of shit, he gets drunk, he throws it in my face that I'm tainted by gladiator, then he hits me. I don't love him."

"Bullshit. You fucking lied to me. Fuck you."

Yelena storms out of there. She's gonna leave the city and then leave Rome. She can be free now. But then it's eating her up. She has to see Kate one last time. She needs a proper conversation and know if she's telling the truth. She finds out where Kate lives with this dude and sneaks into the house.

When she gets there she can hear Kate and the dude SCREAMING at each other. He is in fact talking about how Kate is all worthless because of her stint with a Gladiator. And Kate is basically like "well you're worthless in general" then all Yelena hears is a slap in response and she sees red. She's like "not on my watch."

She runs to where she heard the voices coming from, walks into the room, and is like "Yo, BITCH!". When he turns around she slices his neck open. He's dead in two seconds.

WELL FUCK...she now 1) is a runaway slave who 2) has head hunters after her AND 3) also just killed the husband of the daughter of one of the most important senators of the republic who also just happened to be a general in the most powerful army in the world.........

............that's gonna be a problem..........

[letters-from-eros]

I know you don't have rules for that already but can I ask for relationship hc's for Chuuya and Dazai with a fem or gender neutral s/o?😳❤

A/N: Am I foaming from the mouth for my first BSD request? Maybe. I hope this is good though. I added in a short part on how they asked you out cause I wanted this to be different and unique from most dating HCs.

Pairing(s): Dazai Osamu, Chuuya Nakahara x GN!Reader

Warnings: Slight mention of suicide in Dazai's, cursing

Form: Headcanon

Also: These ran super duper long I'm so sorry

You managed to cuff the suicidal maniac, huh?

Well done, my friend, well done

It took him so long to ask you out, and even when he did it wasn't planned. In all honesty, he never planned to tell you about his feelings. The excruciating part for him is that he did fall pretty fast, and realized he was falling even faster.

He didn't deny them, that wouldn't make it go away. He knew that. He sat and let it festered, hoping it would just disappear at some point.

Had the mindset of anything he loved he'd lose, y'know? Sad but so.

The way I'd imagine it happening is that you both are either working late at the ADA (with just the two of you there) or just at his place hanging out into all hours of the night.

Both of you are laughing at some dumb joke Dazai made and as the laughter dies out he feels.. Bittersweet. You make him feel genuinely happy, like there's no need to put on any mask or facade. That was not a feeling he had with anyone else.

Once silence fully overtakes you both it slips out of his mouth, purely on accident.

"I love you"

"More than suicide?"

"Y/n I'm serious!"

From that night forward you had the pleasure of being the partner of Dazai Osamu, with his feelings being released in an extremely cliche coming-of-age-movie way.

Okay, onto actually dating Dazai

Still goofy as all hell. Honestly the only thing that has really changed is the he lets you in a lot less hesitantly on small things. Its easier to put cracks in his walls, per se

Unbothered by PDA and will probably make out with you in public and not see why that isn't a thing that should be done or why you wouldn't like it.

(Just tell him if you don't, he'll get over it eventually)

Will kiss you everywhere, doesn't exactly have a favorite place, but where he does end up kissing you the most is your forehead for convenience. He'll kiss your wrist if he's holding your hand, too.

Clingy as all hell, always wants to be touching you in some way and becomes the biggest dramatic bitch when he can't be around you.

Kunikida will actually punt him if he says he'll die if he's away from you for another second. For the tenth time

No more suicide attempts once you two are dating, and doesn't ask for a double suicide with you because he knows it'll upset you quite a bit

He flirts with you like he's trying to get you to date him lmao he will never ease up, especially if it gets you bashful.

Dazai would NOT be dating you if he did not trust you a whole lot, so thats something that is pretty vital to the relationship.

That being said, please be understanding of the pieces of Dazai he keeps locked away to never see the light of day again and trust him just as much as he trust you. Its important especially if you don't want the relationship to be one-sided

Also with the high amount of trust he places in you, he doesn't get jealous easily. I mean he may get pissy that you're not giving him any attention but jealous is never the right word to use

Mf finally washes his fucking clothes once he starts dating you. Doesn't smell like the bottom of the ocean on a regular basis anymore.

Dates are always chill and rarely super extravagant. Park dates are often but Dazai's truly preferred date is snuggling inside, watching a few movies and slipping in and out of naps.

Belladonna is his go-to petname for you, of course, but he may bounce around with other petnames for kicks.

He will start calling you weird shit if you ignore him for to long.

Never raises his voice at you unless its in some joking manner. On the rare occurrence that you two have an argument he would need to get extremely riled up before he resorts to raising his voice. He tries to have patience and usually succeeds.

Dazai gets SO soft and SO loving sometimes, and it can be out of no where or something minuscule could have sparked it. All I know is that its nice and cute 🥰

He's usually pretty vulnerable himself when he gets like that so match his energy, alright? If you don't he might end up a little sour for some short amount of time and be more hesitant to get like that

10/10 Lover. This is by no means an effortless relationship, its a constant battle of figuring out boundaries, running into walls and respecting them. Dating Dazai isn't toxic if you treat him right and when you do? It definitely pays off.

(This got so long. I've had so much pent-up Dazai love and all around BSD love and I finally had an outlet to completely let it out)

HUSBAND. THE LOML

Okay, sorry. But this man is the love of my life, and he will be yours as well.

Took him a while to really figure out his feelings for you, or to better put it, it took him a while to label the feeling he had towards you "love"

But ONCE HE DID mans was practically whipped before you officially started dating omg.

You could notice the shift in attitude when he figured out his feelings. He got nervous, went stiff and blushy all against his will. Maybe a tad bit more snappy.

He'd try to keep his cool and then just eat shit and become a babbling angry mess.

After every encounter and interaction with you he'd end up overthinking all of it and when he catches himself doing that he gets so upset with himself. It's really when he realized that he won't be able to keep his feelings a secret forever.

Definitely started avoiding you when planning on the 🌈perfect🌈 way to ask you out and blamed work if you asked him why he was avoiding you.

Anyway, the way he asks you out was almost as calculated as a proposal.

He asks you to meet him at the port and dress comfortably towards the end of the day

When you get there, Chuuya has a nice place set up for you both. A blanket and a bottle of expensive wine because we all know he's lowkey an alcoholic along with a very nice view of the ocean/port.

Chuuya made sure it didn't radiate too much romantic energy to give his plans away; also, he wasn't that nervous. Once he gets truly determined to do something, he doesn't let something like anxiety get in the way of it. The idea of being rejected was essentially an afterthough

Made an effort to make sure he didn't drink too much and neither did you. He didn't want to take advantage of the possibility of you being drunk by the time he asks you out and he knows he himself has a low tolerance

Once the sun began to set is when he asks. Stutters a little bit towards the beginning but smooths it out.

"Y/n, I uh.. I brought you to tell you that I love you."

"Have you drank too much already, Chuuya?"

"No! I'm completely sober!"

It was overall super cute and unforgettable, just as he planned.

Honestly, being in a relationship with this boy is just 🥰

Spoils you so much. You'll deadass be dripped out head to toe purely in stuff Chuuya has bought you.

Dw, he has an alright sense of fashion

Don't try to discourage him, that'll only get him to buy more stuff.

Chuuya's short and the concept of a size difference doesn't bother him at all, he'll find a way to kiss you regardless lol

On the topic of kissing, his favorite places are your lips and hands

He takes of his gloves whenever he's with you and let me tell you his hands are the softest things ever. Albeit his knuckles are a little calloused sometimes.

If you're anything like me, you'd want his soft hands on you 24/7 and y'know what? Chu would happily oblige.

He isn't like the biggest fan of PDA but certainly isn't against it. He'd rather keep things behind doors as much as he can. Holding hands and small kisses on the cheek are very fine by him.

He isn't like the biggest jealous type? He doesn't become overly irate or anything but certainly doesn't take any pleasure in watching you talk to other guys.

Chuuya does have some form of self restraint when it comes to that. Him getting a lil jealous is one of the only things that'll have him completely make-out with you in public or smth

Chuuya is very snuggly and touchy behind closed doors. He practically becomes Dazai but a lot less goofy

Oh yeah he definitely rants about how much he fucking hates Dazai now n again

Isn't huge on petnames but definitely calls you them every now and again.

Princess, babe and baby are his top few.

Chuuya definitely has a morning voice where it drops 2 octaves and its just 🥰

Never yells at you, its pretty shocking. The only times he's ever raised his voice with you is when its very obvious that he's not genuinely upset with you. Almost for comedic affect because it is angry short boy Chuuya

One may think arguments are often with Chuuya, but they're sort of not. He may be a pretty stubborn individual but he never argues to argue unless its Dazai-

He always works towards and agreement to end the argument as soon as possible. He keeps his cool and will never raise his voice. You can barely call them arguments because of how much he tries to keep his cool.

When he's stressed or had a bad day he gets extremely quiet because he doesn't even want the opportunity to open his mouth and take it out on you. The only words he'll say to you while he's in that state is that he's stress and you didn't do anything wrong just to make sure you're not worried over it.

All and all? Chuuya is the best and there's no way around it. He has his faults but always tries to improve and be his best self for you :)

(I had even more pent-up love for Chuuya and it got even longer, whoops-)