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heyyyharry · 3 years

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Deep End - Chapter 11: Date Night

…in which Ezi’s first date gets interfered.

Word count: 2.5k

AU: famous!harry, siren!mc, adult modern retelling of the little mermaid? lol, fake dating, enemies to lovers.

WARNING: MATURE THEMES

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A/N: sorry this chapter is so short. I was emotionally unstable when I wrote this last week :D I'll try to write more for the next one.

Also, please follow my writing account on Instagram: @allie.writes :) Don't forget to leave comments on this chapter!

“Hey, do you remember Dolores?” Dawson asked.

“How could I forget?” Ezili murmured, eyeing her sister up and down.

Of course Ezi remembered Dolores. She couldn’t if she tried. Whenever she looked at Koa, all she saw was what she could never be, what her mother wished that she was, and it only made her despise herself. When she’d first arrived here, she had felt so out of place, but at the same time, free. She still revisited her old life in her sleep, which made her wake up screaming during the night. And despite all the struggles she’d gone through, she felt appreciated. Harry wasn’t anywhere near great, but he wasn’t bad. He looked out for her even though she wasn’t his kind. And she knew if her mother knew she felt this way about a human, she would not be standing here.

But why was she thinking about Harry? He wasn’t here. She snapped out of her thoughts and looked around as the vibrant atmosphere of the night market drowned out her thoughts. Her sister came forward and pulled her into a hug. She could feel Koa’s claws leaving marks on her shoulders, but she knew it was just her imagination.

Koa withdrew with a smile and lifted those perfect human hands with short blunt nails and twisted her hair into a bun. She looked so human, so natural. Ezili wondered how Koa it, but then she caught a glimpse of the trident hanging on a chain around her neck. She’d been using magic.

Immediately, Ezili grabbed Dawson’s hand and pulled him to her side. Koa tilted her head, looking quite confused, which Ezili knew was all an act. Meanwhile, Dawson was blushing. He cleared his throat. “So...Dolores is also here for the book fair. Mind if she joins us?”

“Not at all,” Ezili said with a tight smile.

“Great!” Koa said, hands clasped against her chest.

Ezili tried to figure out what her sister’s intentions were. Was she here to kill Ezili? Was she here to kill Harry? What if she thought Dawson was Ezili’s new target and was here to kill him? Also, how many humans had she killed for her to be here, dressed, act, and talk like a real human girl?

Ezili walked beside Koa as the girl went on and on about how she’d just moved to London, and all the places she’d visited and enjoyed. She must have got all this information from the magic of the trident. She couldn’t be more human than Ezili, who’d had to learn everything by herself.

“Harry?”

Ezili’s heart gave a lurch when she spotted his face in the crowd. It started with a feeling of comfort, like finding a warm bed in the middle of the raging ocean. But then a tidal wave of anxiety crashed down upon her, and she momentarily forgot about Dawson and her sister. She rushed toward him, pushing past a group of tourists and teenagers who cursed at her.

“There you are!” Harry said, spreading his arms. “My favourite fish.”

“What are you doing here?” she hissed and tugged hard at his sleeve. “Why did you follow me here?”

“I didn’t follow you here.”

“Liar.”

“I’m not,” Harry sighed and poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue as he looked around. “Where’s Dawson anyway? Why are you standing here all by yourself?”

Ezili had no time for his questions. “Harry, go home.”

“I’m here to buy books!”

“Oh, yeah? What books?”

“This one,” he said, grabbing a random book from a display shelf they were in front of.

“The Sex Life of Pets?”

“Oh.” His smile dropped as he read the title. “I mean, it does look kinda interesting.”

“Harry, go home. I’m fine.”

“I don’t think you are. Dawson left you here all by yourself.”

“He’s taking care of something,” Ezili said anxiously as she put her arms around herself and rubbed. The air was getting cold. She hadn’t had to feel the cold when she’d been a siren. She hated how weak humans were. A slight change of the weather could get them all messed up.

She was about to tell Harry to go home right now because her sister was here, and Dawson might be in danger. Ezili’s job here was to kill one of these men, not save them every single time. But to her surprise, Harry took off his coat and put it around her shoulders. “Come home with me,” he said, gently. “If you stay here, you might get lost among all these tourists.”

“No, you go home,” she said, pushing his shoulder, but he didn’t budge. “It’s not safe here for you.”

“How?” he chuckled. “I know London like the back of my hand.”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Ezili, you’re acting stran—” Harry was about to finish his sentence when his smile vanished. He pointed over Ezili’s shoulder. “Is that Dawson talking to your sister?”

Ezili whirled around, relieved to find Dawson still alive, but the grin her sister gave her while Dawson was talking to a seller made her uneasy.

“Harry, go home,” she snapped at Harry, shoved him hard so he stumbled back. If something happened, she could only save one of them, and she knew for a fact it would be Harry.

“I’m not going home and leaving you here—”

“And I won’t save you if my sister does something again. I’ll save Dawson, and you don’t want to die, do you?”

At first, she thought those words were all harmless, until she saw the way Harry’s smile dropped, and his shoulders slumped. He said nothing, only nodded. Koa and Dawson were heading towards them now. It was too risky to have Harry here.

“Go!” she shouted and pushed him hard. He didn’t joke about it or react, just held her gaze for a moment and walked away.

“Is that Harry? Harry!”

“He’s leaving, Dawson,” Ezili said and turned to her sister. “Could you come with me to the restroom?”

“Yeah, sure!” Koa happily said, then waved at a puzzled Dawson as she got dragged away.

“What are you trying to do?” Ezili asked in Séren when they were far enough from Dawson, but not too far; she still needed to keep an eye on him just in case.

“Nothing,” Koa answered in their mother tongue. “Although Pretty Boy over there looks quite delicious.”

“Stop it!” Ezili snapped. “You’ve been breaking so many rules around here. You’re not allowed to use the magic of the trident for personal gains.”

“Mother entrusted me with it,” Koa mused.

“I’m sure she’d be happy to know what you’d used it for,” Ezili said, disgusted.

Koa’s dark pink lips curled to the side. “You’re jealous,” she said, leaning back, arms crossed.

Ezili had no time for this. “Please go home,” she told her sister. “I have things under control here. I’ll return in a year with the heart.”

“But you don’t have a whole year,” Koa said. “One year could be a lifetime for these creatures. Humans are fickle. They can stay married for twenty years and still can’t love each other.”

Ezili scoffed, eyebrows raised. “Does the trident tell you that?”

“No, Dolores did,” Koa said, twirling a strand of hair around her finger innocently as if she weren’t talking about someone she’d murdered for no reason. “She hated her husband,” she went on. “I heard her talking on the phone with someone about how she had never loved him, and they had two grown children together. Can you believe it? These creatures made up the thing called ‘marriage’ - a lifetime commitment, which they could not keep up with themselves. And as much as your pretty head wants to see the good in these filthy creatures. They are far from good. Not only do they harm other living things, they also harm their own kind. Physically and emotionally.” Koa put her hand on Ezili’s shoulder and squeezed. “That boy you’re so attached to is no different, Ezili. He will never love you.”

Ezili bit her lip and brushed her sister’s hand off of her. “Don’t tell me about humans when I’ve been here for longer than you do.”

“And yet,” Koa said, “you’re still here.”

Ezili wanted to tell Koa she was wrong for doubting Ezili, but Koa wasn’t wrong. Recently, Ezili had been doubting herself, too. She had even considered switching her target from Harry to Dawson, but she could not feel the same connection she’d had with Harry.

“I have an offer for you, Ezili,” Koa’s voice dragged her out of her own thoughts. She blinked at her sister. “Before your birthday, which was supposed to be your coronation day, you may come back to the Queendom. You’ll tell Mother that you cannot accomplish the mission and ask her to make me Queen of the Seven Seas. Then we’ll have a new Queen as planned. Our evil aunt can’t plot against the throne. And when I’m Queen, I’ll make sure you won’t be banished. You’ll get to keep your title as a princess and stay in the castle.”

Ezili hated that she wasted a second to actually consider the offer. “No. I won’t do it,” she spat, stepping back. “If I accepted this offer, no one and nothing in the ocean world would take me seriously. I would become an outcast anyway.”

Koa rolled her eyes and laughed heartily. “At least you’ll still be protected by the army and you’ll have a family. Or would you rather join the mermaids collecting gold all day for your sad little collection? Also, I’m sure the white sharks would love an abandoned siren.”

“I’m going to be Queen,” Ezili said through clenched teeth. “I’m bringing Mother the heart no matter what. Now you go home and tell her just that. And be careful with my trident that you wore around your little breakable neck.”

Koa opened her mouth to speak, but Ezili didn’t give her a chance. She put up a hand and shouted, “Dawson, let’s go! Dolores is just about to leave.”

Ezili didn’t know what time she arrived home. She tried not to think about her sister’s words, which had clearly been for the purpose of making her doubt herself. She still hoped Dawson had had a great time tonight. They’d bought some books after she’d got rid of Koa, then stopped at a restaurant on the way back to Harry’s mansion. She’d apologised when he’d dropped her off for not being quite herself tonight, and she hated how he’d cheerfully said, “It was nothing. No worries.” Why did humans lie about how they felt all the time? If something bothered you or made you uncomfortable, why not just say it? Why did they feel the need to complicate things? It was hard enough for her to understand human emotions, and they expected her to be able to guess?

“Hey,” Harry said when their eyes met and she froze in the doorway. She’d expected him to be sleeping right now. “You look clean. Guess your sister didn’t kill Dawson?”

Ezili narrowed her eyes at him and kicked off her shoes. “No. Nothing bad happened.”

“Oh, man. I was hoping he was dead.”

“Shut up,” she said. “Also, I don’t think my sister will ever bother us again.” That, she wasn’t sure. She just wanted to be reassured even if it was by her own words.

Harry got up, hands slipped into his pockets. “Sooo...how was your date?”

Ezili pretended she hadn’t heard that question. “Why are you still up?” she asked.

He shrugged. “Had too much coffee earlier.” Then repeated, “How was your date?”

“It was fine,” Ezili said. "Why did you show up?"

"I was just making sure you wouldn't cause any trouble? Your name is tied to mine now, in case you've forgotten."

"How can I? You literally remind me of our fake relationship every two seconds."

“Why are you so pissed off?”

“I’m not.”

“You clearly are,” he persisted.

She let out a sigh, about to just go upstairs and ignore him for the rest of the night, but this one question kept tugging at her. So she had to ask.

“Have you ever been in love?”

Harry looked confused for a second. “No. Never. I think I’ve told you about what happened with my exes.”

“But did you love them at one point?”

“Well, I thought I loved them,” he said. “But looking back now, I don’t think I know what love is. It’s just...a lot of times, I want to be alone. Just me and Chilli. If someone enters my life and stays around for too long, it makes me uncomfortable.”

“But I’m also living here. We see each other all the time.”

“It’s not like I have a choice to kick you out,” he said, then instantly looked regretful.

Ezili padded across the room and stopped in front of him. “Why would anybody want to be alone?” She knew she didn’t. She was doing all this just to be accepted by her kind, but he, who had everything from fame and wealth to a supportive family, wanted to be left alone?

“You’re not the first girl to ask me that,” he said with a grin. “I think it has a lot to do with how I was brought up. I feel like everyone has these certain expectations for me, and when I don’t meet those expectations, I disappoint them. I just want to be by myself so I can just be me. I don’t want to adjust myself to the presence of others.”

Ezili nodded then moved a bit closer.

“What are you--”

She surprised him by placing her palm on the left side of his chest. Her skin tingled with the sensation of his little unsteady heartbeats when she came near. “But there’s nothing here,” she mumbled as if it would make sense to him. “You were telling the truth.”

“What do you mean?” Harry let out a nervous laugh and reached for her hand, which she withdrew before he could touch.

“Nothing.”

Harry’s smile faded. “Did Dawson say anything about me?”

“No. We hardly talked about you.”

“What about your sister? Why is she here?” he kept asking when she brushed past him and headed for the stairs. “Does your mother want you back? Ezi, what happened tonight?”

“Nothing,” she lied. “I’m just tired. Goodnight, Harry.”

“Ezi,” he said, his voice soft and pleading as if he could love her for a moment. But how could he? How could a man, who had lived his whole life without falling in love and prided himself on his loneliness, ever fall in love with a siren? He’d said he’d wanted to kiss her again, but there he’d stood in front of her and claimed her presence in this house made him uncomfortable. Then when her hand had been on his heart, she had felt nothing.

So had he lied about it? Humans lied about how they felt all the time. If they could lie about wanting to spend the rest of their life with one person, they could lie about wanting to kiss a siren.

Maybe, just maybe, Ezili should consider her sister’s offer.

#harry styles #harry styles writing #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fluff #harry styles angst #harry styles fic #harry styles x mc #harry styles smut #harry styles series

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peeterparkr · 4 years

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perennial;tom holland|fourteen.

chapter fourteen: snapdragons & sunflowers (Vol. 2)

↳ flower meaning: snapdragons: deception. sunflowers: unconditional love.

chapter summary: to use words.

pairing: tom holland x y/n

warnings: fluff, angst, mentions of sex, remember if there’s smut it’d be under the *, flashbacks in italics

word count: 11.6K

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So, please help me out I think tags aren’t working. So yes, hope you enjoy this :) I’m sorry I haven’t been updating as much so here’s a long chapter to enjoy, please tell me what you think.

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and thanks to @readheadwriter for this one!

The sun was peeking through the window but they’d just noticed it, seemed like the entire day had been gray, maybe it would turn gray again. But right now it felt like the warm afternoon had finally washed over them. Such tranquility. Quiet.

They knew they were their very best when they were together and quiet. Or not quiet, but alone. With no one interrupting their thoughts.

Y/N at that time could only wish she could stay like that forever, with nothing to worry, ignoring the dreadful problems and only… with him. Breathing and heart beats synchronized, as if they had connected on such a deep level, body and soul in their one way they knew how to.

Y/N was often amazed by how precise he was, movements and caresses, the way he knew how to kiss her where she needed to be kissed, or the way his fingers would be soft enough to wash her with delight.

How easily he could ease her sorrow, transport her to a different place. Though she was often wondering how she had wasted her life pretending not to love him. What else was she supposed to do if not love him?

This wasn’t supposed to happen, or it hadn’t been what either Tom or y/n had in mind. Probably nobody. Not this way.

Everyone guessed their fighting was probably still happening, and though James was probably the one to not want to know what had actually gone down, he probably was the only one aware that it would happen.

There they were, her chest on his stomach, his hand in her hair, wondering what they were supposed to do, sun washing them. Staring deeply into each other’s eyes. Tom had this particular way of staring at her that made her blush, shiver even. Under the sheets as his eyes travelled from her eyes to her lips. Still sweaty, and that familiar glow y/n had learned to know and love Tom had after each time as of it had been the first.

So mesmerized she was by the sight of him. When had his eyes so full of hatred turned into such likeness?

There was clearly no right answer to the problem, to the situation. Yet there was only one truth.

They were in love. And everybody knew that.

Y/N had never been one to read romance novels, she loved romantic movies that is, when love finds a way but she always criticized the way the feelings were portrayed.

Ironic since she loved the magic and intensity and ridiculousness in 80’s movies.

But she wished her life as a romantic comedy right now. Everything would be stupidly simpler. Not this mess which went beyond what her heart was able to feel.

But laying on top of him in that warm room only gave her the answer that she wanted to be with him. But her mind kept going back to Cherry. She’d seen she’d gotten some texts from her cousin, and from other people which y/n had inadvertently ignored. That was a lie.

She’d ignored them wholeheartedly.

What did Tom feel? That was the only question. Regret. Most likely.

“I shouldn’t have left,” y/n started knowing damn well that had been their initial downfall. How easily she had tried to escape her fear and pain believing that when she was away it wouldn’t be felt. She had been wrong, but we already knew that.

Maybe Tom understood by then what she was actually apologizing for, it wasn’t her leaving it was her leaving to live with Tim.

Though it shouldn’t have been a problem, there are a lot of things that were in necessity to be unraveled.

The big drama that had been unfolded for a script.

“I should’ve chased after you,” he commented matter of factly. “Seems like my realization came late enough.”

“Chase after me?” She mocked. “As if it were—“

“I’m rather sure you did expect me to show up, I happen to know you very well, y/n,” he reminded her. “And I know you probably expected me to show up at your door when it’s raining and do something very 80’s movies like, you’d want a moment like that.”

She looked away. “I—Well.” She did. But it was stupid to think he would.

“Am I wrong?” He pushed. “Did you not wait for me to show up with yellow flowers?”

She shrugged, embarrassed as she brushed her lips against his skin as if trying to embarrass him just as much as he was embarrassing her. “My expectations for you rely only on merely having any.”

“You’re saying you didn’t have any expectations for me?” He was perplexed, hurt even.

“I’m saying you could’ve only shown up and I would’ve been pleased, I don’t need you to do anything else, honestly,” she admitted. “Because I know that you showing up would’ve meant we’ve swallowed all our pride.”

“And did I not show up?” He questioned.

Not how she had pictured it.

“You did, but in the worst way you could’ve,” she reminded him. She sighed. “Besides you didn’t show up but only after my heart was broken for yet another time.”

He gulped and brought his hand to cup her cheeks. “We did kiss under the rain, though.”

“We’ve had some pretty dramatic kissing, huh,” she stated.

“Pretty dramatic relationship,” he said with a grin.

“However,” she sighed, “and going back to my initial statement.”

“Initial statement,” he mocked.

“I shouldn’t have left so—unpromptedly,” she said with a bit more formality. “I—broke your heart and I should’ve faced my consequences.”

“But you left because of the script, and please, leave out all the formalities, y/n.”

She sighed. “Yes, I did but I should’ve—I don’t know I was scared, I didn’t know how to deal with it. I wanted to let you heal, I wanted to—heal myself because I knew that my baggage would eventually bring us down and—Well.”

“It’s not your baggage though, it’s ours,” he said. “We are trying to deal with that, you know? Work it out. We are in love, we are a couple and this is just a—well, an obstacle.”

“Yes of course but—I—don’t you think it’s a sign?” She questioned.

“A sign?”

“Dunno, feels like we both tried to sabotage the relationship, as if—“

Tom furrowed his brows. “If anything, y/n, you’re laying on top of me after we had sex and—“

“I know, idiot,” she interrupted.

“I think that’s a pretty clear sign that we are deeply in love with each other.”

“That’s only because I have no self control when it comes to you,” she stated. “And you know that and use that to your own advantage, you perfectly know you’re my weakness.”

“Am I?” He smirked.

“Yes and you use it against me,” she stated as she blushed.

“I do not, I—literally have no free-will when you’re around,” he said, his hands back on her back drawing circles with his fingers, “I’m hopelessly and stupidly in love with you and willing to give everything for you.”

She smiled, genuinely, “we are doomed, then,” she stated as she stretched out to kiss him, deeply and passionately, but shortly.

Y/N knew it, he’d always linger like a scar you can never get rid off. His glance would keep her heart going.

“What shall we do, then?” He asked.

“Dunno.”

He kissed her chin, “we could do that again, you know?” He offered mischievously, his hands traveling up her skin.

She rolled her eyes, “Tom, we can’t keep avoiding it.”

He sighed dramatically, “hm no, but we could postpone it,” he offered as his lips brushed hers before finally kissing her again, in his own very way that had her oh, so mesmerized.

She tried to pull away but her lips kept glued to him as if her mind and reason were not in sync with her heart, or body for that matter. She felt him smile and chuckle even against her lips before he pulled away.

“No, baby, please,” she pleaded as his eyes were defeated.

“Fine.”

She took a deep breath, trying to avoid his gaze so she’d be able to say it, “I dunno, I’m still hurt, though I know my feelings, I’m still hurt and I assume you are, too.”

Tom bit his bottom lip, “yeah.”

There was a slight difference, and y/n didn’t know if it was due the fact she could feel his heartbeat or if his fingers threaded down her skin, or maybe due to the tattoos his kissing had left but she knew that they could work it out. They had to.

“So what do you suggest?” Tom asked.

“Talking,” she said.

“Hm, we’ve never been great at that,” he sighed. “But if we shall.”

She watched him. “What did you do to make her fall in love with you?” She asked. “I—“ she sighed. “I well—I want to know.”

“We’re-starting then,”Tom took a deep breath and turned to her. “I guess the same I did with you.”

“You couldn’t possibly,” she stated. “What you did with me—“

“You’re right, I don’t know how I made you fall for me,” he confessed. “What—did by the way?”

She didn’t have an exact reason but love by itself. Did he need to know one?”

“I shall keep that a secret,” she answered. Which was true, for the record, since it was a secret for herself as well. “But with her?”

“Well, I—honestly, don’t know. I didn’t plan it,” he admitted. “I only searched for her.”

“And why did you?”

He looked away. “Loneliness blinds.”

She clenched her jaw and finally rolled off of him, though her skin still longed to be close to him. But this wasn’t a conversation to have in any kind of romantic position.

“I—for a moment, brief—but long enough to mess up my mind, I thought you leaving was for the best,” he said. “I thought you’d eventually realize you have feelings for Harry—“

“I don’t.”

“No, but he kissed you,” Tom said.

The one big thing they hadn’t spoken about, of course, the whole thing Tim was an issue, but Harry.

“And you did write that you wished it had been him,” Tom continued.

Y/N then sat up covering herself with the blankets, this was a conversation they’d pushed long enough.

“For a moment,” she took a deep breath. “I did,” she admitted. “Because I didn’t—I well, you’d broken my heart and I was so overwhelmed and so confused, I did wonder, you know?” She confessed. “Why did I love the guy who’s been an asshole instead of the prince in shining armor.”

Tom didn’t say a thing.

“I did have feelings for Harry,” she continued. “At some point, but they were barely there,” she added. “It was… I mean, before—It was,” she took a deep breath. “Well I had finally gotten over you, yet again,” she forced a chuckle.

He only gave her a sad smile.

“I—Few years after that—kiss on that after party, after prom” she reminded him.

“Oh,” he blushed. “Yeah.”

“I was—Well, being the fool I was I couldn’t stop thinking about you,” she continued.

He laughed. “Fuck, how must you be after what we just did,” he teased.

She rolled her eyes and let out a dry chuckle. “But you were an idiot as usual, yet it took me a while to get over you, and I—Dunno, I was spending more time with Harry, and as usual he was a gentleman, and l—“she sighed, “I guess I started wondering why—Why don't I love the man standing right in front of me—and at that point I knew his feelings for me, he wasn’t subtle,” she added.

“And you didn’t—“

“I knew you hated me for that, I could see the way you were disgusted by how I just simply decided to ignore his feelings—“

“And I did everything because he liked you—I—I know it sounds stupid but I couldn’t—“ Tom sat up as well. “I felt guilty for loving you and I knew you—liked me, and I felt guilty and so I did everything to push you away.”

Y/N nodded. “Did a great job on that,” she pointed out.

“But you did have feelings?” Questioned Tom.

“I’m not sure if I had them or if it was merely a whim I tried to calm,” she admitted. “Because I was—I think I forced myself to it, you know? The whole—y/n why don’t you love him instead, and yes, I did wish I had—liked him instead at some point, but not because of you—Maybe a bit, at that point, we weren’t exactly as—“she cleared her throat. “As close as we are now.”

He hummed a chuckle, “close.”

“Well, yeah, so yes I did ask myself why I loved the guy who treated me like trash instead of the guy who— you know, so maybe I didn’t like him and it was only—No, that’s a lie. I did like him, I—started seeing him with different eyes but I was scared because—No feelings towards anybody have ever been as strong as those I have for you.”

He only reached for her hand, and brought it to his lips.

“I’m sorry for the things I said on the script,” she continued. “I—however I don’t regret all of them.”

“I should’ve read it—“

“Yeah, I was—too harsh on the first few pages.”

“But then—“

“Yeah,” she cleared her throat, “but no, I didn’t have—I don’t have feelings for Harry, I do—love him and I’ve missed him too much now that we’ve been apart—don’t get me wrong but when we—broke up I just needed Harry, I needed a best friend and he wasn’t there and—“

“Yeah, I get it,” Tom sighed.

“Harry is my best friend and he’s the only one—I can actually open up to, last night he just listened for the sake of listening,” she nodded. “And even if he had feelings for me he never—pushed them, you know? He knew I had feelings for you even if I never truly dared to admit it out loud and Harry always listened for the sake of being my friend. He never tried to make me fall for him when I was sad or—He was only a friend. And I—missed—I still miss him, and I hope, I—I can get rid of Tim if you ask me to but please never ask me to get rid of Harry.”

Tom watched her, listening closely. “I wouldn’t. Not—not even Tim.”

“But I assume it wasn’t easy for you either,” she pointed out as she then reached to the floor, searching for clothes, she reached for the one sweatshirt tom had used, not the one she’d borrowed. “When I left, I just—I guess it would’ve been easier if I had Harry, yes I had Emma and Emma had become a very good friend but—I don’t know, I needed Harry but I guess it was even more difficult for you, you were the broken hearted now.”

“I was the bad guy,” Tom started. “Ruined my brother’s engagement, humiliated my girlfriend and made a drama. And—my girlfriend had written about my brother and my brother had kissed you. I—yeah, I wasn’t doing okay.”

She sighed as she put on the clothes, Tom reached for the remaining ones.

“Plus, when I realized I didn’t care about the script you were gone already, and to add to my misfortune, you were gone with Tim.”

She looked down. “I didn’t leave with him, he just happened to be leaving as well.”

“I know, but given your history with him, given our history, too, I thought we were through, and after yelling at each other on the phone, I only—I sank into this—dark place, besides you’d left me some—daffodils?”

“Oh, yeah, I had forgotten about those—“

“I didn’t, I watered them every day and took care of them, I am even having my mother sit them while I’m gone,” Tom admitted.

Y/N felt her heart warm and glow, he’d taken care of them.

“Daffodils,” Tom repeated.

“Perennial flowers,” y:n said, “they—bloom again every now and then and they mean—“

“New beginnings yeah, Cherry told me,” he admitted.

She grimaced. “Yeah, guess she misunderstood the message,” y/n said, with the least poison she could.

Tom gulped, “I—yeah, but I assumed you meant you’d have a new beginning, one without me—“

“I meant we had a new one,” she cleared up. “And I mean—“

“Well—I get that now, but I didn’t back then and I thought it was ironic, it was—-I wasn’t doing okay, I was just—and then, it got worse…. how I was diagnosed with a heartbreak just—“

“What?”

Tom shrugged, “it hurt and I wasn’t feeling myself and—“

Y/N then regretted writing the script again, remembering the sole reason she had initially started it with all honesty, to make him feel the heartbreak, to make him go through that pain she’d gone through. How ever could she wish for the love of her life such a pain?

It was her turn to hold his hand. Such a weird conversation they were having. Just listening to each other, no complaining, no interrupting, just listening to what the other feels.

“You were diagnosed?” She questioned. Had he felt as bad as her?

“I went to the doctor and they said my body—had gotten used to being—around you, we exchanged chemicals or whatever that—Well, made me happy and then—it was gone” he cleared his throat. “I was going through withdrawal of love or so the doctor said, and it’s apparently normal to have a physical reaction because of stress and levels—“

“Of cortisol yeah,”y/n knew what he meant as she approached him, he hesitated but then held her close.. “I’m sorry—I’m—sorry you had to go through that.”

“You’ve been there too, huh?” He asked. “That’s why Valerie—“

“Yeah,” she let him go just slightly, still close enough to feel him breathing, and looked up at him. It made sense though she still couldn’t quite find the piece to forgive him for being with her bloody cousin, she—understood.

“I know it sounds like an excuse, and I know it shouldn’t—“he cleared his throat, “but I didn’t mean it to be with your cousin—I guess I was just trying to find back something that made me happy—someone that could get me out of it, you know? To relieve some stress, I guess.”

She understood.

“Yeah, which is—“She bit her lip. “What kind of happened with Tim, the first time.”

Tom grimaced then.

“Maybe that’s why I was so broken-hearted,” she stated. “Seeing you and Cherry, I mean. Thought Cherry would be your Tim.”

Tom nodded. “Is that why you slept with him?”

It was far more complicated than that, honestly.

“Do you love him?” Tom added.

She took a deep breath. “I did love Tim,” she stated and then took a deep breath. “Still do, not going to lie but—not in the way that—I love him as an old friend, it doesn’t come close to what I feel for you,” she bit her lip, “I guess I’m grateful for him, for taking me out of dark place, I’ve told you about it before—I—I’ve always known he loves me and after a while of listening to everyone say we were meant to be I guess I bought into the idea and—not anymore,” she nodded. “I think what’s different this time is that I know that I love you and only you and—I slept with him. But you said it loneliness blinds and I was in desperate need to be loved and—he offers that—to love me unconditionally—“

“Don’t I love you unconditionally?” Tom questioned.

Did he? She stared at his eyes. She didn’t want to go there, though she wanted to believe he did. “You see Tom, I felt worthless and replaceable and the one person who was never made me feel...replaceable is Tim.”

“Have I?” He asked.

“Yes, twice—or even more, like that one time at the club or now with Cherry,” she said. “It hurt, Tom—“

“I mean—I—well, what about when you broke up? He brought another girl to Harry’s and Sam’s party.”

“This isn’t about—“she sighed. “This isn’t about Tim.”

“What is it then?”

“I think we both try to ignore our biggest baggage,” she stated.

“Rome—“

“Not quite.”

“What?”

She plopped on the bed. “We hated each other our whole lives and sometimes we pretend as if we didn’t.”

Tom bit his lip. “I didn’t,” he intertwined his hand with hers before laying down to place a soft kiss on her cheek.

“No, Tom—I mean,” she cleared her throat as his lips kept brushing against her cheek towards her neck, “I know we are all—well this way—“

He grinned before kissing her neck. “This way?” He asked before looking up at her.

She rolled her eyes, “Yes—this way.”

“Which way?” He asked again, before kissing her sweetly, and deeply.

“Tom.”

“This one?” He kissed behind her ears as his hands landed on her waist. “Or… this one?” He was kissing his way across her face.

“Tommy—“she said softly. “No,” she shook her head. “No, yes, yes I mean that way,” she said blushing, “but we weren’t always like this,” she stated as she kept being peppered with kisses. “even if we try to pretend we were—“

“I’m not pretending.”

“Tom, I mean how many pictures did you have to search to get the one for my birthday?”

He licked his lips, “uh—“

“Like all of our pictures— we hated each other, and I mean—“she closed her eyes since his lips had found its way back to her skin, threading through her neck. “Tom.”

“I’m listening, darling” he mumbled in between kisses.

“Tommy,” she pleaded again. “You’re not listening.”

“I am, you’re saying we hated each other and I know that did but I am just trying to prove to you that we are in a very different position right now.”

And they were, literally and metaphorically speaking as he kept kissing her neck.

She decided to enjoy it then, “Now, we are—“she took a deep breath. “but—but, but, but, but our whole lives we were enemies and we never truly had a transition from it.”

He hummed a chuckle, “I think we had a very clear transition.” He had smirked as he looked up back at her, sight digging to her.

“Please,” she scoffed. “even the first time we had sex we pretended to hate each other.”

He raised his brows. “Huh we did. We’ve had sex on the weirdest of situations.”

“Yes and we kept being rude after that—“

“And then we slept together again and again and—“

“Yes I know, I know!” She interrupted him as he laughed, making her giggle. “but—it’s weird though—it’s—Tom,” she couldn’t stop her laugh. “Tom it’s weird.”

“What is?”

“I think that’s why we avoid fighting,” she stated.

“We don’t—“

“We are avoiding it right now,” she pointed out, “because we spent our whole lives fighting—“

“And we were very good at it,” Tom acknowledged.

“Yes and we probably avoid it because—“

“We might end up hurting each other,” Tom finished her sentence.

“Yeah.”

“Old habits never wear out.”

Tom finally rolled off of her and took a deep breath. They stayed quiet, for a bit, as if they had to listen now to their own very thoughts. To make room for their own feelings. For most of their lives they’d been enemies and then this and—how y/n always flaked on feelings and how complicated she was. It was weird, she’d always pushed every single guy away because she had feelings with Tom and now she was pushing Tom away, and she didn’t know why. But she didn’t want to push him away.

His hands above his head, her hands above her heart.

Did they need to be rational? Or did they have to follow their feelings?

“What do we have to do?” He asked after a while.

She sat up and hugged her knees. “I—don’t know, “ she sighed. “Are we being rational?”

“If we are, then do we—“

“What would rational people do?” She scoffed.

Tom gulped. “Break up?”

She looked back at him, with fear. She knew those words were coming but she had avoided them. Did they have to?

“I don’t want to break up,” he stated quickly.

She felt a relief, “I don’t either.”

He sat up. “But—do we have to?”

“I don’t know, maybe it would be the rational thing to do—“she pursed her lips. “Yet, I don’t want to lose you, because though—we’ve been through hell, losing you would be the one heartbreak I would never be able to heal from.”

That made Tom smile as he pulled her close to him. Y/N knew that their love story wasn’t one girls would wish for, it wasn’t a picture perfect, magazine like love story. It was full of hatred and reckless feelings. And looking back at it, y/n would always get a pain in her chest, not sure why. Was it torture? It couldn’t be. Why was she so invested in him? Why did she love him so much if she’d been warned with signs all over again? Was he worth the pain?

There was that feeling that the flashing lights were blinding her again, that there was a clear sign to get away from him and rush and escape, but she’d find her way back to him. Because it was thrilling, and exciting. But they were lost, very lost. And they could pretend they could last forever, and they would if they tried to but right now there was no clear path, though it was simple and though they were in love, it just… hurt. Being apart from him seemed like the worst kind of torture she could think of.

It was scary to stay, too. Because what if they lost their minds, too? Things hadn’t changed, not much. Not really. Y/N was still so in love with him, but she was exactly in the same position she was when she’d let him.

What if they escaped?

But they still had to talk about a lot of things. Because escaping was following their hearts, and they probably had to be rational, for once.

Harry was, on the other hand, tired of being rational. For once he wanted to follow his heart. He didn’t. He instead was going through the most recent events which he couldn’t quite map yet. He knew about Tom and y/n….

Harry didn’t know anything about them. He didn’t care.

That’s a lie. He did care. Just not right now. Harry had a lot in his head. And it seemed like the roles had been reversed, him and Emma were not talking or anything. And probably Tom and y/n were.

Or were they?

Y/N had not answered and this was typical of y/n. She did this thing of running away, that's what she did the best, he knew that. But she usually ran to him.

And she had, last night.

He felt wrong. And Harry wasn’t sure if he was prepared to deal with y/n and Tom breaking up. Not because he didn’t want to be a friend with y/n but because he’d barely had anyone to deal with it. His own breakup, because of course the room had been on Tom. Usually, it was. Harry never minded but right now he needed some help for himself.

And he knew that probably if Tom and y/n broke up it would be intense.

Not because of y/n. Y/N didn’t make her breakups intense.

Tom did.

But not y/n, Harry knew that. Except when it came to Tom. Like when after Rome, y/n pushed everyone away.

But after Louis all y/n needed was a night watching The Breakfast Club and pizza.

Even after Tim, well, that had been harder.

They’d broken up on New Years Eve. Harry still remembered it happened at that one party, right outside it. While everyone was having fun, getting their asses drunk and dancing to the music, y/n had walked back into the room, boyfriend less and with her mascara run across her face. Just slightly, as she’d run to the bathroom.

He remembered how Tim had also walked in and rushed to Emma. Emma had spent a certain amount of time listening to Timmy, but eventually came back to Harry, and kissed him at midnight. Harry knew by then.

Emma was the love of his life, undeniably flawed but perfect for him. Not the one couple you’d think that would end up together but the one that after seeing it, made sense.

Emma had stayed to help him clean up, and he remembered staying up all night, seeing the sun coming out. Talking nonsense.

Emma told him y/n and Tim had broken up.

Harry didn’t know why they had broken up by then, but he had guessed it right after they hadn’t kissed at midnight that something was wrong. The very next day y/n had shown up to Tom’s place looking for Harry, she had avoided Tom and ran up straight to Harry and even Emma. Emma had gone to her best friend. Knowing Tim needed her.

Y/n had explained to him how it had gone as they kept cleaning up.

“I fucked up,” she had said, “I may have lost the love of my life for some stupid whim of mine.”

“What happened?”

“We are on a break,” she explained. “He said he can’t be second to my heart and I don’t blame him.”

“And is he?”

She had stopped, staring at a bottle. Harry remembered Tom had shown up to the kitchen.

“What are you doing here, y/n? Gathering your breakfast? Didn’t know you had to scatter for trash here, thought you had Tim for that.”

Y/N ignored him, knowing damn well that ignoring Tom was her greatest weapon. Probably the reason why she had left this last time. Not giving Tom any attention was what he hated the most.

And she ignored him that time.

“You’re not welcome here, y/n, may I remind you.”

Harry turned to him. “Not now, Thomas.”

“Unless she helps us clean, at least be useful for once y/n,” Tom continued as he approached them. “Why the long face, y/n, it’s a new year, you know how they—new year, new you, maybe you’ll get a new chance to dump Tim or he might dump you.”

“Thanks, Tom, glad to know though it’s a new year you’re still the same piece of shit,” y/n had snaked.

Tom had left, eventually.

“Then?” Harry asked. “Why did you break up?”

“It was a boring breakup,” that had been one of the first times y/n had lied to Harry. Or rather, purposefully lied to him. “I—“and she had opened up. Crying, slowly. Quietly. “I don’t know—I mean I knew it was coming, everything went down after the proposal and I’m—“

“But if you didn’t want to marry him—“

“But maybe I should, I—I can’t keep holding to a whim that makes absolutely no sense.”

“What whim, y/n?” Though Harry thought he knew the answer.

“Dunno, he said we should—meet other people, he told me to get—my feelings sorted out.”

“Did you give him the ring back?”

“He asked me not to, and maybe I won’t—maybe I’ll end up wearing it one day.”

And y/n had been different after that breakup. She had been quiet but she hadn’t made a big deal out of it, quietly swallowing her thoughts, she’d be around more, though.

She would want to hang out more and propose crazy schemes and ideas. With y/n it was more movie nights, and giving a shoulder if she needed to cry.

So, Harry wasn’t fearful of that. He knew how to deal with y/n’s breakups which only involves hanging out more.

However he had never seen her break up with Tom. And it is fair to say that most of the breakups y/n had had were because she had feelings for Tom. So of course, last night Harry had finally seen y/n in her truest form, y/n crying because she loved Tom.

It seemed like a paradox, really. How most breakups had been because of Tom and now she was most likely to break up with him.

But Harry could deal with it.

With Tom, though. Harry knew he’d have to deal with Tom’s anger or sadness or whatever. And he’d have to listen and watch and…

he didn’t need that. He loved his brother but Tom made everything big, and Harry, even if he wouldn’t admit it out loud, was on y/n’s side, even after everything, because Harry had been on the first row to Tom’s awful way to treat y/n. Harry wasn’t a fan of it.

Because, Harry was well aware that though Tom and y/n had fucked up recently, he knew that their main trouble was their past haunting them, both of them knowing exactly how to hurt each other. Y/N, in Harry’s mind, had run away after the script incident exactly because she knew that would get Tom. Even if she didn’t do it purposefully, in her mind, she probably wanted Tom to feel her absence because if there was something Tom hated was to not be given attention.

And Tom knew how much y/n hated being replaced, so that’s probably why he had searched for Cherry.

Because even if Tom and y/n liked to ignore it, Harry knew they were still the same kids who knew how to hurt the other, and that was their biggest problem. If they kept ignoring that they’d learned their whole lives how to make the other cry, they wouldn’t understand why they’re crying right now.

So, complicated.

Harry wanted a break on his own, and he wanted to sleep, take a shower, get his mind off of everything. However no one had warned him. There was still that feeling of slight guilt, how he wasn’t being true to himself. There were a lot of things that Harry regretted, kissing y/n wasn’t one of them, because he needed to know how he felt, and though he’d known it for a while, that Emma was supposed to be his endgame, he needed to know how it felt. And Harry did go back to the kiss every now and then, and how it hadn’t felt like he had expected it to go.

It had been sad, but beautiful, honestly. Y/N had kissed him back, as if she herself had been exploring her own feelings, too.

She’d been late to her own feelings. And Harry did wonder from time how things would’ve gone had one slight thing been different. But they wouldn’t have worked out, Harry knew.

Because y/n was meant to be with Tom, and Harry was meant to be with Emma.

And it would’ve been a tragedy, Harry knew, those that felt like dreams, with the sun setting with a bittersweet melody. Had they been together, Harry knew, their love affair wouldn’t have lasted and it would have been sad, and Harry didn’t know why. He knew they’d be picture perfect, one of those reminiscent loves one likes to go back to, because they seem like only a memory. It would’ve been a good one, though, but very short. Tasteful dates, probably, but then Harry would’ve had that guilt, knowing that y/n loved Tom and knowing Tom loved y/n.

It was more than that, he knew that he wouldn’t have worked it out. Not like with Emma, a marvelous love that could fit in that pendant that Emma still owned.

Harry loved Emma. But someone should’ve warned him. No one had warned him that he’d be walking home to a fight.

Though he wasn’t sure what he’d heard.

“Friends? We both have feelings, you’re wearing my clothes and we just-- and you’re suggesting being friends?” Harry could hear Tom, as Harry rolled his eyes exhausted.

“Yes,” y/n had answered.

“Friends don’t have sex,” Tom had pushed. Harry wondered if Tom thought his relationship with y/n was merely sex, and if it was, then Harry understood a lot about them.

“Well, you see, we wouldn’t have sex and you know, even if we...you were friends with my cousin and you had sex with her just fine,” y/n had said. Harry blinked. They were still having that conversation.

“We are back to that,” Tom sounded angry.

Harry didn’t know if he had to leave.

“Yes Tom we are back to that,” y/n sounded tired. “Oh, so you thought that by just kissing me I would forget it-”

“I mean I didn’t but I didn’t think we would have had sex if you weren’t going to consider accepting my apology, and we were doing fine, y/n,” Tom sounded angry.

“Yeah I— breakup sex never heard of it?” Y/N had this terrible flaw of calming down and the bursting out with anger again.

“Is that what it is?” Tom snapped.

And Tom had the fatal one of being too stubborn and proud to try and solve things.

“I guess it’s what it’s supposed to be, Tom!” Y/n answered. Harry groaned. “You slept with my cousin, she kissed you last night—I slept with my ex, I don’t even know why we are trying to solve it.”

“Because we love each other, I love you-” At least Tom sounded a bit more calmed now.

“Yeah well maybe we shouldn’t and we haven’t realized that,” Y/N said. “No I… I didn’t mean that, alright? I know it, I love you, so, so, so much but this… Tom.”

Harry also knew that y/n was one to always be conflicted with what she was supposed to do, or feel, hence why she dated Tim and hence why she had tried having feelings for Harry.

“No y/n we—I thought we’d gone past that,” Tom was one to never know what to say.

“Well we haven’t, clearly,” y/n’s voice was quiet.

“Y/N, please.”

“I don’t know, okay?” And Harry knew that y/n probably really didn’t know. “I love you,” she did. “But I’m—hurt and I’m—angry and I know that wasn’t—Well it wasn’t very smart of me but I’m—This is why I need a break but we can’t really take a break because I can’t be away from you because of the script our friends—”

This was y/n fearing the surrounding.

Harry felt guilty listening to them but he also needed to know what he’d be dealing with.

“Yes the script,” Tom said.

“Which you shouldn’t have accepted to direct in the first place—Why would you want to direct the thing that broke us apart?” Y/N had raised her voice.

“It wasn’t the script that broke us apart and you know it,” Tom snapped.

“Didn’t it?” Y/N snapped.

This sounded more like the Tom and y/n Harry knew, fighting and challenging each other. But he knew they didn’t mean it.

“It’s so much more than that.”

“Then there you have your answer Tom, we don’t—We would end up here anyway so let’s just stay friends while we—While we film.”

Tom groaned. “Why can’t we keep being a couple?”

“Because you slept with my cousin, I slept with my ex, a normal couple would break up.”

But they weren’t a normal couple.

“I don’t want to break up,” Tom said. “We were working it out, y/n, what happened? You checked your phone-”

“Yes and Cherry texted me, and Cherry says she has her version, and I don’t want to hear it, I don’t want to hear how she fell in love with you, and how you broke her heart or whatever, and I got angry again, and she can--”

“We were doing fine-”

“No, we weren’t, or...we were avoiding it,” she said. “Like we’ve done before because this, this is our nature, fighting.”

“It’s not.”

It was.

“It is.”

“Y/N, I love you, with all my heart, and I can’t be away from you,” Harry heard Tom say.

“I know Tom and I feel the same way, but--”

“We could try, y/n we just… We were okay, we just had sex it must mean something.”

Had they really had sex? Harry couldn’t believe them.

“So you agree?” she asked. “you’re saying sex does mean something. It’s your words. Did it mean anything with her?”

“Not with her but… when it comes to us it does.”

“Why did you have sex with her?” She asked, perplexed as if trying to understand it herself. Harry assumed she’d asked that question a million times before.

“Because I missed you.”

“So what?” She snapped. “Because we share dna you thought your dick—”

“We already went over this,” Tom reminded her.

There was a moment of silence. Harry really felt bad for peaking their conversation.

“Did you kiss her back, last night?” Y/N asked.

“I didn’t and you know that, why would I?” Tom answered.

“I dunno … I’m… I’m sorry I just… thought.”

“What?”

“I thought maybe being friends would be the answer.”

Harry approached them, they were in the kitchen.

“You said that after we just had sex,” Tom pointed out.

“Oh my god you had sex?” Harry asked, perplexed just as he had walked into the kitchen, not because he really wanted to question that, though he did but to make them realize he was there. Thankfully they were fully clothed.

“Harry!” Y/N said.

Tom only closed his eyes with stress.

“You guys had sex?” Harry asked again, now because he meant it. Had they had sex instead of talking?

Both y/n and Tom looked away, embarrassedly. Y/N was sitting on the counter, her arms folded above her chest and Tom right beside her.

Harry looked around at the kitchen. “Please tell me you didn’t have sex here.”

“No,” Tom snapped. “Harry we’re in the middle of a conversation.”

Yeah, he knew, he’d heard half of it.

“I didn’t know you’d be here,” Harry said. Because honestly he didn’t. “Especially you,” he said, glancing at y/n. “You tend to… run away and not face your problems so I didn’t know.”

y/n cleared her throat. “I want to fix things.”

“You didn’t think we’d be here?” Tom asked.

Harry shrugged. “I thought you’d be searching for her, and she’d be hiding,” Harry admitted. “I’m sorry, I’m going to leave you guys.”

“You really didn’t-?”Tom questioned again.

Harry wasn’t sure why.

“No,” Harry said. “I figured you’d be fighting somewhere, not home having sex oh my god that’s gross.”

Tom and y/n both groaned.

“Look, our relationship is complicated,” Y/N said.

Harry nodded. “Yeah, I know, so I’ll leave you to it, I’m gonna go take a shower and not bother you but please if you’re gonna - at least wait until I....leave, please.”

“We’re not-” Y/n tried to say.

Tom scoffed. “Look, you don’t--”

“No, I don’t, I’m sorry, you guys keep-” Harry gulped and turned around..

“Wait, Harry,” Y/N said.

Harry took a deep breath and turned back to them.

“What would you do?” Y/N asked.

Tom frowned. “What?”

“Please, he’s the only person who is rational here,” y/n said.

“I thought this was between us,” Tom whispered.

“Yeah, yeah, sorry,” she sighed.

Tom pinched the bridge of his nose. “No, but what would you do, Harry?” ”

“I don’t know. Talk. Be sincere with the other I’m—Look I’m sorry but—” Harry rolled his eyes. “I don’t want to be involved.”

He wanted to say ‘Y/N last night you were devastated and now you’re telling me you had sex with this man?’ How last night y/n regretted falling for Tom.

Harry knew she probably didn’t mean it, and the way she ws

What did Tom do to make her so vulnerable? And what did she do for Tom to be so little when it came to her.

He didn’t. He didn’t listen to what they said after that. Harry was tired, and they were bickering, something along the lines of not being able to move forward with their talking, and something along the lines of not wanting to break up, and also being supposed to do it. They were loud, as if both of them were trying to give their excuses to Harry but that they wanted to stay together, or whatever mess they were saying. Something about Cherry, something about Tim, and then the script. He even heard Harrison’s, Clark’s name.

They were bombarding Harry with information he didn’t care for, with excuses and warning signs and trying to solve their problems. How they were okay for a bit, and how Tom was stressed about how she had turned angry again out of the blue and y/n saying that they hadn’t truly talked about it, how they kept avoiding it, and how y/n had offered to be friends with Tom while filming because dating was too complicated because Tim was around, and how when they would go back. How she didn’t want to ruin the script and how Tom didn’t want to either. There was a constant, ‘but I love him’ ‘but I love her’ they’d tell Harry, ‘but I love you’, they’d say to each other. How it was better to break up but neither of them wanted to.

“Everything was easier when you both hated each other,” Harry blurted without even knowing he had. Maybe because it had been what he had been wanting to say since he’d found out they were dating, back from when they were in New York. He didn’t mean it.

Both Tom and y/n backed away.

“I’m sorry,” Harry said with regret. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry … I didn’t.”

Tom coughed, “no, but it was.”

Because Tom agreed. And not in a way that he wished they were back on that, no, but it seemed like things were easier. At least he didn’t have to care about what he did, or… No, he just didn’t want to be in this mess. And he was angry now, why had y/n suggested being friends? They could be everything but friends.

Going back to enemies was easier, even. Easier than being friends at least. He needed a drink to talk it with her, go back to the calm afternoon they had been sharing. And Tom was feeling lonely. Because y/n wasn’t listening to him, she was just trying to get into her world and she didn’t know what she… No, that was the problem, she knew what she was supposed to do and she always listened to what she was supposed to do. A breakup was the thing that made sense, for both but neither of them wanted to break up.

But Tom felt like she suddenly changed, as if she didn’t even know him. As if he was standing in front of her and she didn’t recognize her. He needed time, patience and time to talk with her. Because he loved her and he didn’t care if he looked vulnerable while doing it. And she wasn’t listening. She hadn’t truly listened to him all this afternoon while Tom tried to prove to her that it was her and only her whom he loved. That they weren’t enemies anymore. That though it had been them, that didn’t define them now.

Why couldn’t he say it? Why was it so difficult saying what he meant? Tom was never good with words, he just didn’t know how to phrase it without screwing it up. It didn’t help that y/n was good with words when she wanted to, sometimes it seemed like though she was building up what she was saying as she went by, it was as if she’d thought her words for an hour at least. Yet her decision making process was always blurry.

Harry gulped, “I’m sorry, no, I’m happy you guys are- Well no I’m not happy I-I mean.”

“I think we should take another break y/n,” Tom said.

“What? No, don’t break up-” Harry gulped. “Or I mean you can…”

“No, I mean, we need a… water break,” Tom said, knowing that y/n would understand what he meant. “Maybe go for a drive, I don’t know.”

Harry felt guilty, Tom could tell.

“Yeah, no, fine,” y/n agreed. “I’ll go get another jacket, I’m cold, again.”

Tom watched her leave and breathed heavily.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to say-” Harry started.

“No, I-I know you didn’t but I get it,” Tom sighed. “It’s not easy, I’m-”

“How--how is it going?”

“We were okay… and then we started fighting again because we got back to it, and we went in circles and I dunno, I think… I… we can work it out but, then she suggested being friends and,” Tom rubbed his face. “I don’t know. I just can’t be friends with her, and… I know she meant it for the best because we have to be around but I can’t just…”

Harry watched him. “She was really heartbroken last night,” Harry warned.

“Yeah, I know, I can’t blame her,” Tom said, stressed.

“No, really, Tom, she was… devastated, so her coming to you and wanting to work it out, just… give time to each other,” Harry said. “She really, really loves you,Tom,” Harry continued. “But really, just… talk, alright?”

“What would you really do?” Tom asked. “You know her, what does she-”

“You know her, too,” Harry pointed out. “Just use it for good, this time.”

Tom didn’t know what to do with what Harry had said, and there in the car, with y/n. Both of them quietly, with the windows up and the radio off.

“Where… do you want to go?” Tom asked.

She shrugged, she was wearing his jacket around her shoulders. “Let’s go to New York,” she joked. “We worked fine there.”

Tom smiled, slightly. “No, really.”

“I… I don’t know,” she sighed. “There’s… Um, there’s this very cheesy place.”

“Cheesy place? You know a cheesy place?” Tom chuckled. “Who would’ve thought?”

“Shut up,” she rolled her eyes. “It’s this place, near a beach, you can see the ocean and there are flowers and there are rocks and it’s quiet and nice.”

“Near the beach,” Tom seemed thrilled. “But… rocks? Are you trying to murder me?”

“Maybe,” she chuckled. “No, I mean, it’s nice, we can go elsewhere if you’d like, to that diner or-”

“No, the beach sounds nice,” he nodded.

Then quiet again, then at least, Tom had turned on to okay some music and he’d rolled the windows down for the rest of the ride. Tom was still processing the multiple conversations they’ve had, and how he did understand where they were coming from. Every single one of them. But he couldn’t help but look at y/n’s flying hair.

And, alas, they still had some hope. Or Tom liked to think that. Now that the sun was on the way to set, and as they were on that spot, near a beach, wtih an incredible view, and flowers, just like y/n had said. But she hadn’t given the place the fairness she should have.

It was quiet, and in any other circumstance it would’ve probably been romantic. The sun merely setting, the perfect day, but this wasn’t what romance felt like. Or maybe it was, in the very Tom and y/n way.

"Harry isn’t right, it wasn’t easy when we were enemies, not for us at least, it hurt more ” Y/n had said, as she was leaning against the car, arms crossed.

“Yeah, we’ve been in worse states than this,” Tom said, right beside her.

“I’m sorry I asked Harry,” she said. “And-”

“No, I get it,” Tom said. “We were going in circles and maybe it was good he walked in before we continued the loop.”

She took a deep breath. “I.. sorry I just exploded with Cherry’s texts.”

Tom nodded. “No, I get it, I would’ve gotten worse had I received a text by Tim.”

“We can’t make any promises now, can we?” She asked.

Tom took a deep breath. “I don’t know.”

“I… look, the being friends thing isn’t….” she gulped. “I thought it was the safest way to keep seeing each other, and not being this mess, but I…”

“Yeah, but being friends means we break up,” Tom said. “And I can’t… break up with you, I love you, y/n,” he said to her and she gulped, “am I allowed to say that?”

“I—yes—why wouldn’t you?”

Tom watched her, he knew she loved him, and looking into her eyes were just the answer he needed. “Dunno, seems like it hurts you every time I say it or try to prove it to you like it’s the worst thing you could possibly hear.”

She blinked watching him, “I—no, that’s not true.”

“Then why else are you—rejecting me—“

“I’m not rejecting you Tom, I’m—“she reached for his hand. “This is a very complicated situation, Tom.”

“What’s complicated about it?” His hand pushed her chin up to face him, as his other hand landed on her waist. “I love you and I want to date you and I want to—“

She sighed as she looked away.

“See, this is what I mean,” Tom sighed as he backed away

“I’m not trying to reject you, Tom, I need you to listen to me, and I need you to talk,” she said. “And it’s what I mean too, Tom, we can’t pretend we are not angry or hurt, I—but…”she reached out to him and cupped his face. “I’m so incredibly in love with you too so I’m just not sure what I need to do. And I know you want to—“

“Yes let’s stay together.”

“But—I feel like we can’t, and I don’t know why.”

Tom pursed his lips, riveting her with his arms, “why not?”

“I—dunno, it makes no sense. But—I love you.” She let him go and then leaned back against the car, staring at the beautiful view she was offered, the sea plummeting the rocks nearby as the sun was setting far from them, painting the sky a perfect pink and lilac paradise. One very much beautiful sunset that y/n would probably treasure.

It was odd, the flowers surrounding them were all yellow, as if y/n had planned to be surrounded by yellow flowers or it was probably a coincidence playing them fair and square. There was barely any space for a beach, for the shore was covered with big boulders.

The sea splashing against them was the only sound they could hear for a bit, for they went quiet.

“It is a cheesy place,” Tom pointed out after a while as he had paced around to take in the view. “Suits you.”

She scoffed and nodded. “The flowers add to it all.”she looked at him “Was it too soon?” She asked. “We just.. Went for it, you know, we should’ve talked about it first and then start the relationship or whatever we were doing.”

Tom looked at her and reached for her hand, “I don’t think it was—No, maybe, yeah, a bit soon, but—“

“Why—how Can you be so calm?” She asked him.

He looked her in the eye, “I guess I have to be.”

“Right.”

“I don’t hold any grudges against you, y/n, I thought we’d grown past the needs of any,” he pointed out.

Y/N breathed in heavily, “I—would like to say I don’t have any grudges, but I wouldn’t call them that way, I’m just—I built in so many walls Tom and guess I haven’t been able to tumble down some. But—I am willing to work this out so—“

“Will you now? Or are we going to back away again?”

“I’m scared,” she admitted. “Not of you, of me and how—I can’t seem to handle my heartache but, if anything Harry made a point today.”

“He did?”

“I usually run away from you and I tend to avoid solving things,” she confessed. “Except today.”

“I thought you had walked in to murder me,” Tom said, only half joking.

“No, I just burst in, with the fear of the past, which isn’t a grudge but my heart finally showed what I fear with you, that it’s all some elaborate prank that—“

“It’s not.”

“I know, I know, I know you love me and I know I love you but last night I—felt that way again, alright? That’s—that’s why we need to understand, I felt like watching the same old scene we’d gone through before, and I—for once wanted to change the ending.”

Tom understood, she’d seen her so devastated in the morning, so broken, so not her. Or maybe the truest form when it came to her heartache with Tom.

“I don’t—No, I won’t hurt you,” Tom stated.

“I know, that’s why I brought you here.”

“How did you discover it?”

“I would like to say I discovered them on an adventure while trying to find myself but I actually—discovered this place with—“

Tom squinted, was it with Tim? “Please don’t say Tim.”

“With my aunt,” she finished. “She showed it to me.”

Tom sucked in his inner cheeks, embarrassed he’d assumed Tim.

“Tim is an issue isn’t it,” y:n pointed out, not an answer needed.

“Yeah,” Tom confessed, “but I am willing to compromise avd peor your friendship with him if that means you and I stay together.”

“I can’t keep being friends with him,” she said. And those were the words Tom had been waiting to hear for a long, long time.

“Oh.”

“No, not when he expects me to love him back,” she said. “And not when it bothers you, and—“

Tom watched her with curiosity, trying to understand if it came from his jealousy or if she genuinely didn’t want to be friends with him.

“Besides, I don’t know, I don’t want someone who is my friend only to see if they’re getting somewhere,” she continued. “I know he tried sabotaging us and he was probably relying on you sabotaging yourself, at—at this point I wouldn’t be surprised if he told Cherry something along the lines to make her believe you loved her back.”

“Did she—?”

“Oh of course she did, Tom, I saw it, that’s my big issue, that she was—She—She was like me after Rome, such a fool believing that from you, now she was the victim.”

“But you were—“

“I don’t blame her, Tom, her only sin was falling for you and it’s not difficult to,” y/n explained. “Though I may have always said you’re not easy to love, it comes to my attention how actually I’m wrong, how I keep proving myself wrong and you do too, for god’s sake it only takes you a smile to get me all stupid.”

Tom gulped with guilt.

“I will—“she bit her bottom lip, “I will listen to her version. And I—not as to find proof to leave you, because if I was looking for any I would’ve left by now.”

Tom was hurt by that statement.

“But I don’t want to leave you because though you’d given me dozens of reasons not to love you, I’m afraid you’ve also given me a thousand reasons to keep loving you,” she sentenced but Tom listens to the way she was saying it, as if it hurt her to say it.

“Y/N—“

“I want you to apologize to her,” y/n stated. “Explain to her, kindly but please nothing that could open a window for her, but—“y/n squinted, “I just don’t—want you to be the bad guy, okay? I’ll also clear it out to her.”

Tom didn’t know where that had come from.

“And—I will—find a new place,” she nodded. “I can’t keep being roommates with Tim if I want to work this out with you, besides it can be a small place, I mean I’m only here until we finish filming and—Well then when I go back to London I’m afraid I will have Cherry as my roommate but—that’s a future problem right now—I will look for a place.”

Tom nodded.

Y/n licked her lips. “Now, come here,” she said.

Tom watched her with surprise, and walked over as he was received by her open arms, he smiled slightly before she pressed her lips against his, a warm kiss, soft enough as her hands travelled to his hair and his fingers pressed into her waist.

“Don’t you ever dare to say that I don’t like hearing you say you love me,” she stated making him smile. Y/N always thought his smile was the prettiest thing she’d ever seen.

“I-”

Her hands travelled down to his chest and then to the hem of his pants, she toyed with them as she pulled him closer, pulling him by the edge of his boxers now. He blushed.

“Oh?” He chuckled as her hands went up his stomach, her cold fingers threading lightly, tracing each and every muscle he had.

Tom took a deep breath, shivering slightly as she carefully advanced her way through his body. She was decisive, for once.

“Y/N?” Tom asked, slightly hesitant.

“Sh,” she ordered before kissing him again, in the very way she knew he loved, making both of their heartbeats go faster, nervously as he felt his skin was creeping each time her hands were tracing the perfectly declined v-line that lead to where y/n’s secrets where hiding. Then to his back and far down his ass, squeezing it to make him giggle.

Tom weakened to her touch as he tried to push his body as close to her, probably trying to merge into one, pushing her. against the car.

“No,” she said as she pulled away, pushing him away as she turned him and pushed him against the car instead, so casually kissing him, not losing her own control. And then, we had Tom who was melting each time her fingers touched any part of his body, nothing too sensual, but it felt so intimate. It was her kissing him, not like before, it was her kissing him, his face, his neck, on that sweet spot she’d discovered he liked.

Y/N was perfectly aware Tom and her had different love languages, and Tom’s was...mostly physical, though y/n’s was in words, she’d finally understood that Tom was angry because she was saying it but not doing it, and she was terrified that he’d end up walking away, so she decided to talk to him in his language.

He’d memorized her body so she could only do the same for him, as she watched him just like she always wanted to watch him, like he was her favorite movie, or he was the words she always longed to write.

“I love you,” she said to him. “My mind is just a very complicated space.”

He nodded as he looked into her eyes. She intertwined her fingers with his and led the way to the backseat of the car, he chuckled nervously.

“Y/N, see this is why we can’t be friends,” he pointed out as he was interrupted by y/n’s kiss again as she dragged him into the car. “Hm—y/n—y/n,” he chuckled as he was pushed into the sit, y/n on top of him, carefully peppering with kisses all across his face.

She shushed him again as she finally sat on his lap, legs opened and wrapped around him, still kissing him deeply and softly as she brushed her lips across his jawline

“Y/N—I’m pretty sure this is illegal, darling,” he said half complaining as he threw his head back, letting himself enjoy her lips as her hands were still teasing him on the edge of his muscles, her fingers threading lightly still to the muscles that connected his legs to his torso.

She chuckled as she whispered against his ear, “that’s never stopped us before, darling.” She used his word.

He immediately went red and turned even warmer, he knew he usually was in control of the situation so y/n being the one to be sucking on his neck as his hands went up to cup her breasts felt slightly different.

He felt a smirk against his neck as y/n felt a hard bulge growing against her heat. Before he did anything about it, y/n’s hand finally travelled down to wrap her hand around it.

“Fuck, y/n, fuck,” he said as he brought his hands to his head as he threw it back, defenseless.

Y/N smirked, “what do you want, baby?” She asked as she slowly stroked his length, very slowly.

Tom couldn’t put words to his mouth as she kept watching him with mischief. “I—“

“Tommy, use your words, darling,” she said as he was twitching. Y/N didn’t know where she’d gotten her attitude from, but she enjoyed watching him pleased as her hand kept slowly going up and down, very, very slowly, hearing as his breath was halting, chest going up and down.

“Fuck me,” he pleaded, desperately.

She pulled her hand off and continued the path from before, but her fingers were viciously touching his skin. “Care to be more specific?” She asked, with the wittiest of smirks she’d ever shown him as she slowly grinded against him, Tom was pretty sure she was spelling his name with each movement. Honestly, she didn’t know what she was doing, but seeing him so small as she rocked her hips against him gave her power.

“Y/N,” he pleaded again.

She wrapped her arms around him, “you’re so pretty,” she stated watching him.

“Fucking ride me, already, y/n,” he said defeatedly.

She laughed, blushing slightly, “okay, Tommy.” The attitude was gone.

He laughed along, “did-” He couldn’t stop laughing now, throwing his head now back from laughter. “I love you were really into being dominant and then you just-”

She giggled,” shut up, I’m-not, I--shut up,” she was embarrassed now. “I tried- but-shut up, you’ll ruin it, I was going to-fucking ride you.”

He laughed. “Oh, yeah, you were.”

She buried her face against his neck, still not able to put herself together.

He grinned and pulled her face up to kiss her, “I’m still turned on, darling, no worries,” he admitted as she reached into his pocket for his wallet. He was slightly amused by the fact she knew where the condoms were as she took one out and struggled to open it.

She couldn’t stop giggling, though ,and he watched her the very own way y/n loved to be watched by him, as if though she was the most stupid girl in the world, he couldn’t love anyone else.

“God, I love you,” Tom admitted as she had finally calmed her snickering and opened the condom, with the widest smile he could give her, and y/n only looked up to him and peppered his face with kisses.

“I love you too,” she admitted, as she kept deepening their kiss. And she wasn’t even embarrassed because she knew that he loved her even when she was silly. Y/N knew she didn’t want to let him go, and in no way was she going to break up with him, and he was right, they couldn't be friends. Friends don’t touch each other like that.

Actually, she thought, nobody touches each other that way, so intimate and delicately, posing and tracing each other’s bodies and hearts in sync.

No one could ever kiss her like that, not when the sun was going down, disappearing in the ocean, as the moon had already made its way up, covered by some clouds and surrounded by the pink sky.

They both pushed their pants and underwear down and sloppily y/n wrapped the condom around him. There were still some giggles in between their lazy kissing, before y/n finally positioned herself on top of him, letting him fill her up.

She had to catch her breath, and Tom threw his head back but wandered his hands under the sweatshirt he had once been wearing that day. He was thankful enough y/n had decided not to use a bra as his fingers traced their way through her breasts, as y/n’s owns hands were digging against his shoulders, steadily finding her rhythm as she jumped up, and down with pleasure, as soft pants came from each of their mouths, Tom brushed his nose under her neck and down to her still covered chest, as his hands travelled down to her ass to help her rock against him. Quiet moans leaving their lips as they threw their heads back with pleasure.

Over, and over again, y/n going up and down and circling her hips to get her some friction, he got the hint and with a hand caressed her core as she jumped in and out.

“Use your words, darling,” Tom said cockily as y/n still washed with pleasure laughed.

“Shut up, I’m--close,” was all she could say as she grinded against him, and she could tell by his face he was close too.

Her own high washed her first but she, tiredly continued to rock against him until she felt him twitch, as he let out a moan, coming undone as he tried to catch his breath. Y/N didn’t pull out, but continued to pepper his flushed face with soft small kisses.

“I love you,” she repeated before each single kiss.

Then Tom, without even thinking about it, and knowing deep down it probably was a very stupid idea, offered the following, “what if you move in with me?”

next chapter

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hdowlpost · 3 years

Photo

OWL GIFTS for @purplehotmess!

Gift from: anon

Savour on AO3: The Noble and Most Ancient House of Biscuits

Summary: A Christmas poetry collection inspired by gingerbread recipe (each title is an ingredient)—bon appétit! Word Count/Art Medium: 435 + moodboard (8 chapters!) Rating: teen and up Contains: Poetry, Haiku, Food as a Metaphor for Love, Free Verse, Love Poems, Inspired by Gingerbread Recipe, Pining Draco Malfoy, Oblivious Harry Potter

Gift from: anon

Read on AO3: sweet dreams of holly and ribbon

Summary: Draco, usually so serious and buttoned-up, approached each tree with childlike wonder, and the sight of him so happy and uninhibited made Harry’s heart clench with something he usually tried to suppress. Word Count: 1227 Rating: teen and up Contains: fluff, no angst, pining Notes: For Purplehotmess – a fluffy Christmas fic based on "Christmas Tree Farm" by Taylor Swift! I hope you enjoy ;) BIG thank you to my fandom little sister and beta for life, @written-in-ash. Love you so much.

Gift from: anon

Read on AO3: the space between your ribs, should be where i lay my head

Summary: After the war all Death Eaters die. Harry mourns only one. Word Count: 676 Rating: PG-13 Contains: major character death, only hinted at Notes: A songfic inspired by Between Us by Alina Baraz. Being played on loop for weeks now here. Dear @purplehotmess, thank you - you've no idea what this song is doing to me but it's grandiose and beautiful. I was really captured by the trope: major character death (of drarry) but with happy or hopeful ending. I hope I did it justice. I loved being immersed in the feel of the song and it gave me many ideas and settings but I chose this in the end, hoping that you're gonna like it ^^

#drarry #draco x harry #hdowlpost2021 #purplehotmess #yuvica

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wexhappyxfew · 3 years

Text

—— 1 year anniversary to Landslide [BOB FIC]

Wow! 1 year! I can’t even believe that just last year, I was sat in a lake house, in the late hours of the night, trying to figure out what idea was going to be my next for another Band of Brothers story! I remember the moment and where I had been sitting when the idea hit and looking back, I’m so glad it hit when it did. Landslide is far from that little idea I got in that lake house, but has continually developed, grown and changed in ways I look back and can’t even begin to think about how it even happened!

Natia Filipska has been a character that I will cherish close to my heart. Of course, I adore my other OCs and will always love them, but Natia holds an even more special place there in my heart because of the challenge in writing she has offered me. She gives me a challenge everyday - whether it’s having to rewrite a scene 5 times because “it’s just not her” or completely starting over a chapter because knowing Natia, she’d have a better way to get out of this situation.

I’ve also made one of my absolute favorite ships, coined “Fliptoye” by a few readers (you know who you are hehe) and it has grown to truly be a favorite of mine for so many reasons. There was no “love at first sight” or really anything like that. Just two human beings realizing they genuinely care for each other and enduring both the struggles and hardships that come along with realizing in war, you care for something that war can also touch. That for one of the first times it is not longer just about you or the buddy next to you. Natia Filipska and Joe Toye have been a joy to write!

And of course there was the month of disliking Richard Winters, the iconic nickname of “Mapkeeper” for Lewis Nixon, the Roman History nerd jokes that have now developed with Ronald Speirs, the slow start of some sort of friendship because of cracking a joke about Nix with Harry Welsh, and the comfort of a friend from Carwood Lipton.

Even Joe Liebgott and Natia Filipska have swiftly become a favorite duo and I can completely agree. Getting to see where they started and where they are now — from seeing their differences and arguments and heavy weighted disagreements to know finding ways to comfort each other even in the midst of war and making sure the other is okay and even eating. They’ve definitely been one of my favorite duos to go through that sort of character arc together.

AND OF COURSE, we can not forget one of the most important driving forces in the fic, Death, himself (alongside the sarcastic bits of War haha), most importantly the personification of Death. What draws me to a character like him, is more than anything the fact words can not be communicated between Natia and Death yet they hold such a strong willed connection, that you almost don’t need to worry about words. Each layer that builds with their connection, leads for an even darker end and makes Death even more fascinating in the end.

You can’t forget a guy like Agent Mortem! Without him Natia and Agent “Fidel” wouldn’t be here right? Right? Right….? Well…..anyway…..even with who he is and his partially uncovered past, Agent Mortem remains a heavy asset to Landslide as the leading cause for WHY Natia could possibly even be the way she is and to provide backstory on a multitude of other things, and for reason for Natia to have her redemption. There’s so much unexplored. And I’m so ready to talk about it! :D

Landslide has challenged me in ways I can’t even begin to describe both mentally and emotionally with my writing. I’ve had to rewrite, rework, edit over and over just to get it right but at the end of the day, it is always worth it. In some ways I don’t even know what else to say, and almost think the story can speak for itself! It is made for you to interpret it they way you wish to interpret it, there’s no right way to see who Natia is or what Landslide is about — whether for you it be about family, friendship, love in war, darkness and overcoming that, the struggles of mental health, finding your own inner peace or independence….whatever it may be, I hope it has possibly even helped you somehow in anyway :) Even with the MAJOR HECKING ANGST (LMAO💀) or the extremely sad parts (that honestly are probably just super sad to me LOL), it still is a fic full of lessons and stories equally about someone like Natia!

I can’t WAIT for whatever else this story has to bring to the table! With still a bit of writing for the future to go, it makes me so incredibly hopeful for an end in sight on both Landslide and Natia’s character and peace for all those lost throughout the story <3

Thank you to EVERY single person who took a chance with Landslide and took a read, if you were from Day One, saw it while scrolling through Wattpad or AO3 or Tumblr, or even saw the Spoon meme! I appreciate each and every single one of you! Whether you voted, commented or left a kudo, or just even took a read! I appreciate you SO MUCH! I can’t even begin to describe the joy this story has brought me and the challenges as a writer it has provided. I’m hopeful for the rest of this fic and hopefully for one or two more to come!

Special shout-out to @vintagelavenderskies for being by my side with this project since like DAY ONE?!?! EVEN BEFORE DAY ONE?!? I don’t even know but just genuinely for so long, how could I not tag you! You always are just so excited to hype me up as well as Natia (the lil bean) and give me support and comfort for whatever I was doing (especially that support, there was some rough moments throughout the year and the fic lol!) I just can’t thank you enough for your friendship and joy you’ve brought to me! <3 Thank you my friend, so so much, for everything! :D

I’ll also shoutout a few more lovely people who have just been…..absolutely wonderful in providing both support, or insight, wonderful commentary or just sweet messages throughout writing this! @tvserie-s-world (thank you for all the moodboards!!)@wecomrades @stressedinadress (credit do you my friend for og fliptoye name!!) @pxpeyewynn @whoahersheybars @kryzes @holdingforgeneralhugs @martinsrestingbitchface @whovian45810 @geniedocroe @thoughpoppiesblow @how-are-those-nuts-sarge @alienoresimagines @alejodi0nysus @brichard-bwinters and just genuinely anyone else who even sent me a small ask or message, I appreciate it so much and your support or love or help in anything Landslide-related, helped me more than anything! <3

THANK YOU! TO ALL OF YOU! I don’t know what else to say except thank you. Thank you for letting me bring who Natia was, alive through this fic as well as her spirit and compassion of ending the war. Along with her friendships of Easy Company and hardships of both her past and mental health. It’s been an honor and privilege — here’s to many more! ✨

Happy reading! <3

tags: (because you’ve all been there for support and I simply adore you all <3) @sunnyshifty @alienoresimagines @vintagelavenderskies @julianneday1701 @huenoclue @liebegott @hellitwasyoufirstsergeant @sunflowerchuck @tvserie-s-world @wecomrades @thoughpoppiesblow @pxpeyewynn @rogue-sunday @stressedinadress @jalapeno-peaches-andhersheybars @lovingunderratedcharacters @legally-devorak @sgtxliptons86 @alejodi0nysus @mrsalwayswrite @heffrcns @curraheewestandalone @supervalcsi @xthefourthx @whoahersheybars @kryzes @papersergeant-pencilsoldier @whovian45810 @how-are-those-nuts-sarge @geniedocroe @holdingforgeneralhugs @martinsrestingbitchface @pipster4107 @mads-weasley

-> Feel free if you wish, to drop a favorite part that you really enjoyed from Landslide so far, a favorite memory or moment, happy or sad, a possible favorite quote or friendship if you wish too! If you feel even more inclined, questions are open as well! I have work all day but will be home to answer ;) THANK YOU ALL <3333 (mine has GOT to be the whole lone wolf thing lol!)

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goldenkookietae · 4 years

Text

Love Borrowed (M) | KNJ

BTS One shot

Pairing: Musician!Namjoon x reader

Word count: 7,011 words

Warnings: fluff, cute, excessive love for books (not really a warning but idk), little heartbreak(?), smut

Summary: It’s been a long time since you’ve visited the local library. But when you do, you didn’t expect to bump into Kim Namjoon, a book lover just like you. When you start spending all of your time together, you realise that maybe everything in those romantic novels you loved could actually happen in real life.

A/N: Omg, I just added this one to my personal favourites and I am so surprised that I was able to finish this faster than my other ones. Anything that crosses your mind while reading this, comment or send me an ask! Hope y’all enjoy it!

Disclaimer: This story is an AU fan fiction that I have created using the names of the members of BTS. I do not claim any ownership over the members of BTS. The plot and the personalities of the characters are entirely my own.

Do not plagiarise my work and do not repost.

Moodboard

*I do not claim ownership over any of the pictures. They are credited to their original owners.

Stepping out of the house that day felt different. No one was giving her worried stares, no one was trying to convince her to stay home and no one had so far, looked at her with pitiful eyes. Y/N felt free after a very long time. It wasn’t as though the people around her were very controlling, not at all. It was just something everyone did while looking out for their loved ones.

A soft breeze ruffled her hair, stray strands moving to cover her face as she walked down the road she knew like the back of her hand. Pushing them behind her ear, she sighed in content, her eyes locking onto her destination. A small village where everyone knew each other, and everything was just a walk away. Nothing had changed much, except for her.

The local library was an old building, not the most famous, only recalled by youngsters struggling with assignments and a few rare people with a penchant for reading. That was why she was there that day, a familiar feeling of comfort settling into her bones as she entered the brick building. There were only about five people inside, maybe a few more in between the shelves, but she could see only students sitting in different corners, for what Y/N assumed was more focus.

The walls were lined with huge shelves of books, some old and rusty, some stained and a few looking brand new which were definitely added recently. Y/N usually preferred books that had a used feel to them, it was somehow better than the stiff pages of books never touched before. The yellow pages gave her an odd sense of relief and unlike other book lovers, she enjoyed marking her books and dog-earing the pages.

The old lady who usually looked over the library was missing that day, but it was evident that no one ever stole anything from the place. People had a sense of trust there, remembering to return books and making sure they were put back in the right shelf. In a way, that was the respect the old lady had earned from the visitors through the years of manning the place.

Y/N stopped in front of a shelf randomly, inspecting the spines of books trying to choose which ones she could take home. The shelves went up as high as the roof (which was actually pretty low) and Y/N was suddenly reminded of the library at Hogwarts. Chucking the Harry Potter books into the must-read list, her gaze went higher, and she came across a book that looked more like a diary, thick brown leather and a tie going around it and disappearing behind. Curiously, she pulled a ladder towards herself and climbed up slowly, clutching the shelves to keep herself steady. As soon as her hands caught the spine, she quickly came down, knowing she might just topple off being the clumsy person that she was.

“Hi.” She jerked when the voice sounded much too loud in the silence of the library, turning around and being faced with a broad chest. Blushing, she looked up at the person, and the first thing she noticed was a dimpled smile. Glasses drooped from the bridge of his nose as he tilted down to look at her. His brown hair fell to the top of his ears, lightly parted in the middle to give a glimpse of his forehead.

This man was beautiful. Even more so when he raised his eyebrows at her and touched her arm lightly.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” He muttered and Y/N shook her head smiling.

“No, I was just surprised that’s all.” She said, holding her book tighter to her chest and squeezing it lightly.

“I’m Namjoon. I’m new here.” He held out his hand and Y/N took it immediately, gripping his warm hand and giving it a light shake.

“Y/N.” She said, and when she was about to pull back, Namjoon caught her hand and jiggled it quickly, then swung their hands side to side. To most it might’ve looked weird but Y/N recognised it immediately.

“No one has ever given me a Narnian handshake before.” She laughed and Namjoon followed. It was surprising that this small reference to a movie she’d watched as a kid brought about a burst of comfort while she was in the presence of this stranger, because they were still swinging their hands and neither one of them felt awkward about it.

And that was the beginning of their friendship, that would soon turn into more. Over the next week, they visited the library often, and in between those days, the excitement that came with going to the library shifted from the love of books to the loving company of each other. Y/N found herself struggling to remain silent at times, trying to hide her giggles at the goofy faces Namjoon made from across the shelves.

They fell into a routine of reading, picking a book as soon as they came in and competing as to who would finish their book sooner. The next day, they would exchange their books and the battle for the fastest reader began all over again. Once both were done, they would review each one, telling each other their favourite parts and their interpretations of the how the author meant to deliver certain lines.

Y/N wished she could do this all her life. She was starting to lose these battles, often opting to stare at the man across her than the letters in her book. The book was definitely interesting, and on any other day, she would’ve been so immersed in it that she would skip her meals. But that day, Kim Namjoon, who was reading, sat on the floor across her, his hair tucked into a beret, glasses sitting low on his nose and his back leaning against the shelf, legs crossed and the evening sun casting a golden glow upon him - he, had all her attention. Y/N watched him from the top of her book as his lips lifted into a small smile at what she assumed was a good part in the book. She would definitely hear all about it later from him and she wouldn’t dare forget.

How could this man be so beautiful? How could he, who she barely knew anything about apart from the fact that he loved reading and was a hopeless romantic just like her, be so attracted to him? So much that he was all she could think about every second of the day.

Before she could decide to look away, Namjoon’s gaze abruptly shifted to her and in that moment she froze, her eyes not leaving his and accepting the fact that he’d caught her staring. This happened much too often these days, when they’d pick their books and accidentally catch each other on opposite sides, or when they were both reaching for the same book.

Y/N still couldn’t forget the one time that she’d caught him staring at her while she was reading a Sherlock Holmes mystery. They both knew she’d caught him, but Namjoon had played it off as something so normal, going so far as to pull her bottom lip from between her teeth and telling her, “You look adorable when you read.”

Her cheeks blushed a furious red every time she remembered that day and it didn’t get any better when such compliments became more frequent.

Her heart thumped when Namjoon got up and walked over to her, sitting so close to her that their sides were pressed against each other. Y/N liked the warmth and wondered why they hadn’t done that before.

She turned her head towards Namjoon, when he cleared his throat, something he usually did when he first spoke after a stretch of silence.

“Y/N, I was wondering. Maybe we could read somewhere else tomorrow? I was out cycling last night and I found this amazing place and it’d would make an awesome place to read. You can read in the open air, with a cool breeze and we could bring some food along too. Like a picnic! I know you’ll love it!” Namjoon looked at her nervously, waiting to see if she would share the same opinion as him.

He didn’t have to wait for long. The beautiful description that Namjoon gave her already had her agreeing, but the shine in his eyes when he spoke about it and the way he’d thought of sharing this amazing place with her was what made her heart flutter.

“Of course. Come pick me up tomorrow at my house.” She said, trying to sound casual and hoping to god that he couldn’t hear her heart thundering inside her chest.

And as she sat down on the blue blanket laid on the grass the next day, her heart was still beating out of her chest as she watched Namjoon carry the picnic basket to put it in front of her and then laying down spread eagled. The place really was beautiful, a small clearing in the middle of a field, the sound of a gurgling water from a nearby stream soothing to listen to. She looked down at the man who’d brought her to that place as she fiddled with her hands.

Hesitantly she reached out her hands and touched his hair, and she sighed at how soft it felt. Without thinking much she carded her hands through his hair, noticing that Namjoon had closed his eyes.

“Why did you shift here?” She asked suddenly, the thought of a successful music composer shifting to a small town unexpectedly made her believe that it wasn’t just a casual thing like he’d said before. She half expected her question to go unanswered, thinking Namjoon might’ve dozed off.

But he answered a few minutes later, his eyes still closed as he lifted his head from the blanket onto her lap.

“When I first moved into the city, I loved it. It made me feel important in a way, the busy roads, the constant phone calls, meeting so many few faces, it was all so new. But, it got really tiring you know? I started disliking everything about it, I realised my life had become so hectic, so chaotic, that I actually had no time for myself. I was so lost trying to make a place for myself, I think I lost myself somewhere along the way.” Namjoon paused.

He had no idea why he had decided to spill everything, he hadn’t even answered her question but he knew her. He knew she would understand him, at least that was what he hoped. He didn’t dare open his eyes, because he was scared of what he would see. What if she was uncomfortable and didn’t really want to listen to him talk about his problems? An apology was at the tip of his tongue, guilty for dumping his thoughts onto her out of the blue.

“What made you realise?” Y/N asked, and Namjoon felt his shoulders relax. Her tone sounded sincere, and with all that he knew about her, he could tell that she wanted to know and wasn’t asking just because she felt obligated to.

“Two years ago, it was summer, and one of my friends visited this town. When he came back, I could see the change in him. He seemed much more happy, constantly reliving memories from his trip. It was clear that he met someone there, and the letters he would constantly write, all the time he spent talking on the phone and the kind of songs he wrote, it was obvious. Be it that person, or the town or the people here, it had inspired him to do better. So that’s why I came here. To find inspiration.” he finished. He restrained from telling her more, constantly biting his tongue so as to not slip something she wasn’t ready for yet.

“Did you find it?” Y/N asked, her voice small while she absorbed everything Namjoon had said. At that his eyes finally opened, looking up at her as though he had seen the shining stars in her eyes for the first time.

“Yes, I definitely did.” He whispered, and with slow movements so as to not startle her, he brought his hands to rest on Y/N’s cheeks, praying that she was okay with their pace. After all, she didn’t know him like he knew her. Her comfort was the top most priority and he would do anything to keep her at ease. When he saw her cheeks darken and grow warm in his hands, his eyes slipped to her lips and back up to her eyes, only to notice that she was staring at his lips too.

He pulled her face closer to his, watching her reaction, a bated breath and a million thundering heart beats later, their lips finally touched. And in that moment, everything in his life felt complete again. Their lips moved together in sync, and Y/N was amazed at how wondrous it felt. How right it felt. Her body responded to his touch so spontaneously that it was hard to believe that she’d met this man just a month ago. He kissed her and held her like she was his entire world and she kissed him back like he was her home.

When they both parted for air, she rested her forehead against his, her form bent over him while her arms went around his neck and laid on his chest. They both breathed heavily, Y/N overwhelmed by all the emotion she felt and Namjoon trying to keep his tears from falling. It had been too long.

Pushing his lips into a smile, he slowly moved from her lap and reached out for the picnic basket that he’d brought. When he opened it, he put out all the food they’d stuffed inside, his hands finding the one thing he was looking for.

“I brought you a gift.” Namjoon said, making Y/N look at him curiously. Her eyes moved to the small package he held and she already knew what it was. Judging by the paper brown cover and the slim but stiff shape, it definitely had to be a book.

She took it from him greedily, carefully tilting the package and letting the book fall onto her lap. The words “Under the Stars” were printed in stylish cursive on the cover, the background showed the twinkling night sky of a city and a boy donned in a yellow jacket stood with his back facing her. It was definitely not a new book judging by the coffee coloured pages and the dog-eared corners. She quickly flipped through the pages, seeing a lot of places where the sentences were highlighted in different colours and a page where it looked like something had been spilt on it.

“I know it doesn’t look great but, it’s my favourite book. I’ve read it more than a million times and every time I start it again, I just read it like it’s my first time. All the highlights, they’re my favourite lines, all the dog-eared pages, they’re my favourite parts of the story. I wanted you to read it. I think you’ll love it.” Namjoon smiled softly.

Y/N was at a loss for words. His words had stirred something deep inside her, because she was so sure she’d never come across anyone more beautiful than Kim Namjoon - the man who stole her heart, in her entire life. His thoughts, his gestures, his words, everything about him was so pure and so honest, falling in love was inevitable.

She couldn’t help it when she pounced onto him from her place, throwing her arms around his neck and not caring that the force of her attack had made both of them fall backwards. She lay there clutching him close to her, feeling a warmth bloom inside her when his arms wrapped around her waist.

“Thank you. I know I’ll love it.” She whispered, and she felt him smile as his face nestled closer into the crook of her neck.

That night, Y/N sat in bed after a long shower, the sheets pulled over her form as she clutched the book above them. Looking at the book made her feel so giddy, the butterflies in her stomach only multiplying when she touched her lips, feeling the lingering taste of Namjoon’s lips on hers. When he’d kissed her good night after walking her home, it had taken everything in her not to cling to him and stay glued to his side.

Y/N couldn’t believe it was happening, her life seeming like all the love stories she’d read in the novels. Their moments were magical, spell-binding and the only thing that made her afraid was that, all such stories did have a tragic twist, and she hated that the thought had even crossed her mind. Nothing could make her give him up now, and she would prove the fact that not all stories were that complicated.

People meet, like each other, fall in love, get married, have a beautiful family and live happily ever after. That was what would happen. Y/N buried her face in her pillow, blushing at the thought that she’d road mapped her entire life with Namjoon just after their first kiss. Clearing her throat she flipped to the first page of “Under the Stars” and began reading.

“I can’t believe this. This book is enchanting.” she said, two weeks later, her eyes roaming over the coloured pages for the hundredth time. Namjoon laid on the blanket as usual, his head resting on Y/N’s thighs as he read a book while holding it up over his chest. The place had quickly become their special place and they spent most of their time there. However, this time around, their focus was always interrupted by each other, with stolen glances and quick kisses.

“Yes, I know, it’s a beautiful book.” Namjoon said, put his book down on his chest and smiling at her. “I’m glad you like it.”

“I love it. I can’t believe it isn’t more popular. The last part when they’re both at the roof confessing to each other, my favourite.” Y/N enthused, remembering the last pages, where almost every line had been highlighted and all page corners had been folded inwards. It made her feel like there was something about this book that Namjoon was keeping from her and that bothered her. She desperately wanted to know.

“Why’re there three colours here?” She asked as she pointed to the highlights. A few lines were marked in yellow and light pink, and a majority of them were in orange as though both yellow and pink had been used, turning it into a different colour altogether.

Namjoon’s response came all too quickly. “Just colours.” He shrugged, and Y/N couldn’t help but notice that there was a little hesitance in his voice. That only confirmed her suspicion, and at the same time made her feel like she was over thinking things.

“I see.” She said, flipping another page full of colours, this one dog-eared. She heard Namjoon hum, before he was pulling away from her and sitting upright.

“Have I kissed you today?” He asked, his finger tapping against his chin as he pretended to think. Y/N giggled and set aside her book, crossing her arms as she imitated his look.

“I don’t know...have you?” She asked playfully, conveniently pushing aside the fact that they’d spent the whole ride there stealing kisses from each other.

“Don’t think I have.” Namjoon bit his lip and Y/N followed, biting her own.

“No you haven’t.” She told him, watching him crawl closer to her as he stopped inches from her face.

“Better late than never.” Namjoon murmured before pulling Y/N to him, their lips clashing hungrily, a need to feel each other closer etched in their minds. Her hands trailed over his chest and reached behind him, meshing with his soft hair trying to pull him closer. His tongue trailed over her bottom lip softly, waiting, and she let out a tiny gasp as she parted her lips. The soft muscle immediately clashed with hers, and she wondered if she could ever stop herself from kissing him.

His hands on her hips tightened as he pulled her up onto his lap, her legs going around his waist immediately so she could feel him against her. One hand reached up to cup her jaw as he bit on her lip and pulled. A moan spilt from her lips as a low groan rumbled in Namjoon’s chest.

Before she could do the same to him, a splitting ache hit her, a sudden jolt of pain as she pulled away and clutched her head. Her brain went blank, her eyes turned foggy for a few moments before the pain receded in waves, making her breathless and exhausted.

Namjoon sat stock still, his hands holding her steady as he rubbed soothing circles into her back while she recovered. She’d already told him about this, and he’d already seen it happen to her once before and also panicked, but Y/N had explained it to him. Since then, he’d hoped. He hated seeing her in pain, but he hoped it could bring back something.

“I’m sorry, that wasn’t on purpose. I really want to-” Y/N started feeling guilty that something like that had to happen in the middle of such an amazing moment, but Namjoon cut her off.

“It’s okay, love. I know.” He smiled, rubbing her arms and giving her a small kiss on her nose. “Do you want to lie down?” He asked, and she nodded slowly, the need to close her eyes growing even more.

Y/N sighed as she let Namjoon do all the work, clearing up the place for her as she lay down. He quickly joined her side and she wasted no time in turning towards him and laying on his chest. His arm spread underneath her, curling around her shoulder to pull her closer as his bicep acted as her pillow.

His warmth, his musky scent and his steady heartbeat. Those were all she needed to fall asleep.

“I’ll let you borrow that one.”

The words echoed over and over again and Y/N jolted from her sleep. Her forehead was covered with a layer of sweat and her breath came out in pants as she wiped her face with the back of her hand.

The book, those words, they definitely had to be a memory, and even if it wasn’t much, it meant everything to Y/N. It was like looking through a keyhole, being able to see just a glimpse of it, but not knowing what secrets the room held. But somehow, she knew she didn’t need all of those. She’d remembered something that was enough to make her believe of its existence, and the rest, she knew she had someone to depend on for.

That someone was now sitting up with her, hugging her tightly and rocking her as though she had had a nightmare. She smiled. It was good dream, it was a memory.

““I’ll let you borrow that one”, that’s what I’d said. I remember Namjoon, I gave you that book.” She whispered, and felt him stiffen behind her. Those were words he’d dreamed of hearing, never in a million years thought she would say them and now that she had, he had no clue on what to do.

“How much do you remember?” He asked, his voice shaky and he tried to gulp down the lump in his throat. At his words, Y/N looked away from him, her face frowning as she tried to recollect.

“I’m sorry, it’s not much. But I remember using the pink highlighter. I did those, didn’t I? In the book? I’m really sorry, I am trying to remember but I just-ugh.” Y/N grew frustrated that her memory was failing her the one time she had needed it desperately.

After her accident, she had made peace with the fact that she’d lost two years worth of memories, because she had been around the same people all her life who told her all that had happened. But what she did not expect and never gave much thought to was the fact that all her memories with a particular person had been completely wiped out.

Her recovery itself had taken more than six months and she’d had an year to get back to normal when she understood that those memories were gone. But had still left a mark upon her. She just hadn’t tried, she hadn’t known to try and remember things at all. As though her thoughts, were written all over her face, Namjoon clutched her closer, sensing the anger bubbling in her voice.

“Shh...baby it’s not your fault. I’ll tell you everything there is to know. You trust me, don’t you?” Namjoon asked, tilting her chin towards him with a finger making her look him in the eyes.

“Yes. Oh god yes, I do. Please tell me. I’m so sorry I forgot you.” Her voice trembled as the first tear rolled down her cheek and Namjoon wiped it away instantly.

“I’m here now. We’re both here now. Together.” Namjoon whispered, pecking Y/N’s lips softly before sighing. His eyes held a nostalgic look, as he opened up a painful part of his memories.

“Remember that friend I told you about?” He asked, smiling when she nodded quickly, “Well, that was actually me. I visited this town two years ago in summer, and I met you in the library. You bumped into me while searching for a book. It was a fantasy book about werewolves I believe, The Lycan Mark, I think, which I thought was absolutely ridiculous.” Namjoon chuckled as Y/N hit his shoulder playfully, muttering something about werewolves being very interesting.

“Anyway, you gave me the Narnian handshake and pretty much everything happened like it did this time, we read together all the time, and it was then that I’d found this place. I brought you here and we kissed here. You bought ‘Under the Stars’ at a local fair, and you read it first to make sure I’d like it. You marked all your favourite lines and pages with a pink highlighter and gifted it to me one day. I went home and did the same thing with yellow. Most of our favourites were the same, you noticed the orange ones.” He smiled.

“Those three months were the best ever in my life. But then I had to leave, I had visited just for the summer, I had a job back in the city, friends, I had to go back. But we kept in touch, we wrote each other letters like the hopeless romantics we were and we called each other all the time. That happened for around two months.” He sighed, reminiscing all the days, where he’d stare at his phone waiting for it to ring with Y/N’s name.

“And then the accident happened.” Y/N whispered, suddenly feeling an ache in her chest.

“Yes, I know now. I didn’t receive any letters, no calls, and when I called you, the number was out of service. I thought about it for months about what happened, but there was no form of communication. I finally decided that it had just been a summer love, right? And that I should move on, I tried to, for more than an year. But I just got tired of my life there, it wasn’t so exciting without being with you on the phone for hours or opening up your letter. So I came back here to find you, hoping I’d get some explanation.” Namjoon sighed, giving her a sad smile while Y/N clutched his hands in hers.

“How did you know?” She asked, giving his hand a light squeeze.

“The day I met you at the library, you saw me coming towards the building and I recognised you, but you didn’t. I was so confused. I asked the old lady who you were, hoping she’d tell me of anything that had changed about you and she’d just told me everything she knew. For a moment, it felt like my world had turned upside down.” Namjoon chuckled, trying to lighten up the mood when they both knew that he’d been more affected than just that.

“I’m so sorry.” Y/N whispered, bringing his hand to her face and pressing a kiss to his knuckles. Their story was really something like the novels. A fairy tale meeting, happy moments of love. She was right about the tragic twist too, except she didn’t realise until then that it had already happened. But Namjoon was the one who’d fought for her. He had waited patiently and was still doing the same. She couldn’t imagine how difficult it had been for him.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you when you were in the accident. Or when you were recovering. I’m sorry I ever left.” Namjoon gulped, the lump in his throat making itself painful evident as tears brimmed in his eyes.

“Please don’t apologise, all this time, you’ve been trying to make me remember, right from the moment you met me. The handshake, this place, that kiss, the book,” her voice broke as she held back a sob, "I’m sorry it took this long.” she whispered.

Namjoon simply shook his head, bringing her closer and swallowing her sobs as he covered her mouth with his. He kissed her slowly this time, making sure to savour every second of how her lips felt pressed against him. Feeling comfort at the fact that she remembered maybe not all of him, but at least a piece that connected her to him. They could always make new memories.

They were making one right then, holding each other close as realisation dawned upon them. He held her and kissed her like she was his entire world because that’s exactly what she was. And she kissed him back like he was her home, because that was what he was.

Y/N pulled back to look him in the eyes, her hands softly combing through his hair as she looked at him lovingly. Namjoon closed his eyes slowly, sighing in content as he felt the weight and tension of finally drop from his shoulders, his heart now as light as a feather. When his eyes snapped open, he felt the shift in her gaze as she leaned forward and placed a light kiss on his jaw.

The kiss ignited a fire in his chest and it only burned brighter as Y/N continued to pepper his jaw with kisses, slowly trailing down and breathing on his neck. He felt her lips touch his skin and he shivered when she bit him lightly. Cupping her cheeks, he brought her up to his face again, greedily pressing his lips to hers and slipping his tongue into her mouth to taste her.

His hands slipped under her shirt, rubbing the soft skin of her waist, warm against cool skin. He pulled away from her slightly, still brushing his lips against hers and rubbing soothing circles into her skin.

“Are you cold, baby?” Namjoon asked and despite feeling the chill of the evening settle into her bones, she shook her head just as a shiver ran through her. Namjoon smiled as pulled back from her a little, while she followed his movements to stay closer to him. She watched him pull out another blanket from their basket, spreading it open and wrapping it around her shoulders.

Holding on to the edges of the blanket, he pulled her closer, rubbing her arms in attempts to make her warm. Her lips had found their way back to his neck, peppering kisses while moving higher as she kissed right below his ear. As she adjusted herself closer to him, she felt it, his hardness poking her thighs as it strained against the material of his jeans.

Namjoon flushed a beet red and made to move instantly, clutching Y/N to lift her off of him, but she didn’t budge. Her arms tightened around his shoulders as she wiggled in his lap making sure to brush against his bulge in the process. Hesitantly, he pushed his hips upwards and felt a rush of emotion when Y/N threw her head back with her mouth open.

He didn’t want to rush things and he certainly did not want to make her feel pressured into doing something together and so he bit his lip and looked into her eyes, asking her silently if that was what she wanted.

Y/N couldn’t believe this man, always so concerned about her, always trying to put her comfort above his. Maybe, probably, they were moving a little too fast but when Y/N looked into Namjoon’s eyes she knew she couldn’t wait any longer. Who knew what might happen the next day, life was short and full of unexpected twists every nook and corner, and she could only think of making the most of the moment right there, make every second the happiest. Because that was what Namjoon gave her. Happiness.

And even though her eyes had made her intentions clear, she still said them out loud, to make him happy. “I’m sure. I want you, Joon.”

His heart jolted at that, the form of endearment making it beat faster than it already was. Slowly he turned them both around and laid Y/N on the blanket, her hair splaying out around her like a halo. He stared at her for a long moment, memorising they way she looked right then, going over her features repeatedly to ensure he’d never forget. It was only when she pulled him down by the collar of his shirt whining that he let his eyes close.

Their lips never left each others as they clumsily slipped out of their clothes under the blanket, the chilly night breeze hitting their bare skin and Namjoon pulled the blanket tighter around them.

“Tell me to stop if anything is too much, okay? Promise me.” He whispered, his self control teetering at the edge of a cliff, waiting for him to let go. His erection had become painful, and even if she stopped him right then, he would still have to go sit behind a tree and jerk himself off to ever feel peaceful again.

“I promise.” Y/N whispered before she pulled him to her again, while their hands explored each others skin. She glided her hands over his smooth chest and his abdomen, her fingers tracing the small dips of skin at the edges of his abs. Namjoon let out a soft sigh as she flicked his nipple, and she made sure to remember that it was something he enjoyed.

Namjoon trailed kisses down to her chest, placing tiny kisses just at the swell of her breast and sucking on them, creating hues of pink and purple. A hand came up to squeeze her breast, his other holding him above her so as to not crush her with his weight. His mouth covered her breast as he flattened his tongue against the soft flesh and then flicking her nipple making Y/N moan softly. His fingers imitated his moments on her other breast and her hands travelled up his back as she held onto his shoulders.

With her mind in a mess at how hot and bothered Namjoon made her feel, her thighs clenched together instinctively as she struggled to feel pleasure in her attempts to create friction between her thighs. She pushed her hips upward in need, her skin meeting his, as his hardened member settled into the dip between her thighs. Namjoon let out a load groan as he felt her flesh squeeze together against his member, the fractional moment of pleasure making him frustrated and needing more.

Y/N continued to tease him, enjoying the way Namjoon would release soft gasps while he rolled his tongue around her nipples to make her feel the same intensity. When she’d almost become smug with the fact, she felt Namjoon’s fingers slip between her folds, and she let out a strangled gasp.

“So wet.” Namjoon whispered as he spread the arousal dripping between her thighs all over her heat, flicking her clit before experimentally sliding a finger into her wetness. “So tight.” He grunted as Y/N clutched onto him tighter, her nails digging into his skin as she felt her walls squeeze his finger. He was slowly thrusting his fingers into her, setting a steady pace as he added another finger when he felt her relax a little. Her last time had been more than two years ago, and the feeling felt foreign, yet so much needed as she circled her hips against his fingers.

He slowly added a third finger, his pace going a little faster as tiny mewls slipped out of Y/N’s mouth. Even when she was so tight around his fingers, she couldn’t help but feel the need for more, spilling out the same in words that were lost with her moans.

Before he could push her to her edge she gripped his wrist stilling his ministrations while she tried to regain her breathing. Namjoon looked at her with worry, wondering if he’d gone too fast in the heat of the moment, but Y/N’s next words erased all such thoughts from his mind.

“I want you inside me.” She whispered and Namjoon licked his lips as he slipped his fingers out of her and laid his hand on her belly. Fumbling with a pocket of his jeans lying next to their tangled legs, he tore open the wrapper of a condom as he rolled it onto his member in a hurry.

“Did you expect us to do it today?” Y/N giggled amused, watching Namjoon hurry back into place.

“When you’re around someone you like, you always gotta carry stuff around ya know. Wouldn’t want something so trivial put a break to what could be.” Namjoon chuckled, watching Y/N let out another sweet giggle and he beamed at her. Scooping down to indulge in a rather mushy kiss, his hand travelled down to his length.

Rubbing the tip of his member against her folds, he gathered Y/N’s slick arousal and rubbed it over his length , slowly edging into her heat as she held onto him tightly. Y/N let out a low breath, willing herself to relax as she tried to accommodate the stretch from his thick length. A few seconds later, she nodded to him, Namjoon seeing that as the green light and thrusting into her at a slow pace.

As they both moaned together, a sudden urgency creeped up on them, the need to become each other’s tearing through their skin as they moved faster, Namjoon pumping into her at a faster pace and Y/N pushing her hips up to met his hips for every thrust. They couldn’t describe it any other way than the fear of losing each other again, and the what if’s of whether or not they would find each other again. It was a stinging feeling in Namjoon’s mind, the thought of it making his eyes tear at everything he had been through since Y/N had stopped writing to him. Y/N could sense it in the way Namjoon was breathless, and the salty taste that met her lips when they kissed.

“I’m not going anywhere.” She reassured him silently, watching him pull away from her face to look at her, his pace slowing down again. His eyes shone brighter than the stars in the sky, their light somehow dimming in the wake of his mesmerising eyes. Namjoon was astonished that she could tell what he had been thinking and those were the exact words he’d needed to hear.

“I won’t ever let you go.” He vowed, thrusting into her deeply as Y/N moaned, feeling him hit the perfect spot. Everything was heavenly at that moment, they were in each others arms, warm, and were becoming one under the starry sky. The beauty of it was beyond compare and Y/N bit her lip as she felt Namjoon lower down slightly and press his body against hers gently.

A knot grew inside her, and her back arched, pushing her chest to Namjoon’s torso making him grunt. She wrapped her hands his neck instinctively as he buried his face in her nape, his plump lips touching her skin softly. The knot in her stomach grew as Namjoon thrusted into her faster, his hand coming up again to fondle her clit.

With one flick at the nub, the knot unfurled, Y/N shuddering as hot pleasure shot through her body. It left her gasping and moaning, her held tilted to the side and pressed to the blanket and she pinched her eyes shut. With Y/N’s walls clenching around his member, Namjoon followed her into nirvana, his load filling up the condom as he rode out his orgasm moaning Y/N’s name.

He slowly came to a stop, pulling out and ripping the condom off to dispose it. He laid down beside Y/N after, pulling her onto his body so she was laying on his chest. A few synchronised breaths later, they both turned to each and smiling as though they had something in mind.

“I love you.” They whispered together, a smile growing on both of their lips as their cheeks tinted a light pink. Namjoon slowly titled Y/N’s face towards himself with his hand, kissing her softly before touching their foreheads together.

As they lay under the stars, hugging each other tightly, they were both calm and peaceful. They loved each other and were together and nothing could ever keep them apart. Because no matter what, they’d find a way back to each other. They were each others home, and as they rightly say ‘Home is where the heart is’.

A/N: Let me know if you guys want me to write about ‘Under the Stars’ too. If you do, which member au would you like it to be?

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theymetinargentina · 4 years

Text

All that is and All that Can Be / H.S. - Chapter 1

Authors Note: Hello! This is the first chapter in a series I’m writing about Harry Styles and his wife, Rose, who is a journalist. The story will be set in both present day and past events. There will be lots of angst and fluff:) Hope you enjoy and stick around for future chapters. My inbox is always open so feel free to drop by and say hello<3 Any feedback or comment is greatly appreciated!!!

Moodboard

My Other Work

Summary: Harry and Rose have an important conversation about the future. Mainly an introduction chapter:)

Warnings: Smut, anxiety

Word Count: 2k

**********************************

Each day I woke and felt this heavy feeling in my chest, like what I had wouldn’t be mine for much longer. I couldn’t explain why I felt this way. Everything was fine, sure we had our moments-doesn’t every couple?-but it never even reached a level where I felt I had to worry about our standing. Of course, I wondered if it was me, was I the problem in my life?

“You’re starring again.”

“What?” I snapped out of my daydream- was it really a daydream or a nightmare?

“What’s been with you? Every time we sit down your mind is somewhere else.” I couldn’t help but notice the slight annoyance in his voice, yet I couldn’t blame him. If he suddenly became distant and hardly acted like himself, I would probably cause hell.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what’s wrong. It might be my new medicine but I’m not sure.”

“I wish I could help. You know, sometimes I think it’s me. Like you’re getting tired of me-”

“Oh my god Harry it’s not that, I swear. I love you, I promise it has nothing to do with you. I wish you could help too but I can’t even manage to help myself.” I say sadly.

It was a white lie. Not knowing what was wrong. Of course, I knew. I just didn’t know how to tell him. How do you tell your husband you got a new job in a different country? A country he was never exactly fond of. I knew, deep down, he would have no choice but to be okay with it. Yet, every time I wanted to tell him I felt this sudden rush of anxiety. What if he didn’t want to move and decided divorce was best? What if he grew to resent me and my career? I so badly wish we could stay in Italy, where we weren’t Rockstar Harry Styles and his Nobel Peace Prize-Winning Journalist Wife Rose. We lived a free and simple life here, with no cameras. Sure we ran into fans, but they were always kind. Harry and I loved it here, it’s where we took our honeymoon and decided we liked it enough to stay. He knew when we got married that my job was based in New York. We both did, but it worked there was never any trouble. The only thing that has changed is the promotion I received. A chance to be the Editor of the newspaper I work for.

“Maybe we should take a trip to visit some friends and family. Just to get away from our work and explore a bit.” He smiled at me, I smiled back and thought what a time if ever to finally tell him. Most of my family and friends are in New York.

“Can we talk about something?” I can hear the shakiness in my voice. He chuckles and looks at me with raised eyebrows.

“Of course, you don’t have to ask baby.” Hearing him be so kind, calling me baby, is almost too much. Because I’m gonna make him move from the place he loves so much. I feel my eyes fill with water and I take a shaky breath.

“What’s wrong, I can’t imagine anything you’re gonna say is that upsetting.” He places his hand on my back and starts rubbing my back.

“I got a promotion at work, they asked me to become an editor,” I say tearfully.

“That’s amazing, why are you crying? This is so wonderful baby.” He has the biggest smile on his face and he’s slightly bouncing in his seat, but I know what I’m gonna say next is gonna stop all of it.

“But they said I have to be in New York for it.” I look up and see he still has his eyebrows raised like he doesn't understand why I’m still crying.

“And…..?” he has a questioning tone. He’s stopped smiling but his soft pink lips are still slightly turned up.

“It means we, or I, have to move to New York.”

“It means WE do, we’re married.” He says almost defensively

“Yeah, like full time, we’d need to get a house and everything.”

“I still don’t get why you’re upset? We’ll get a house and we’ll be okay,” He breaths in, “Besides I think a new environment will be good for you, both of us, and you’ll be doing a job you’ve always dreamed about.” I can’t say I’m surprised he’s not more upset. He cares too much about the people he loves to be selfish. If he really wanted to he could say he didn’t want to move and I wouldn’t accept the promotion, but he won’t, I know he won’t because he loves too much.

I laugh and rub my red, wet eyes, “God I was so worried that you’d be upset or hate me-”

“Why would I ever hate you? We’re a team, you’ve traveled across the world for me, you left your home for me. I don’t think I have a lot of room to complain. I care about you too much, you know I would get on my hands and knees for you,” I get embarrassed and lower my head, he chuckles, “ ‘m serious, anything you want I’ll give it to you darlin’.”

I wonder all the time, but especially now, just how I got so lucky. I’ll never understand why the universe deemed me deserving of all the love I have received and continue to receive. I feel so blessed to be the one on the other end of his love. Growing up, I never imagined myself going through life with someone else, someone who loved me so much it made me want to burst with happiness. I look at him with dry tears on my face and mouth ‘thank you’. He smiles, a genuine, bright smile, and gets up to walk toward the backdoor. I follow and immediately the fresh air filled with flowers blooming hits me. Oh, how lucky I am.

Immediately out the back door of the villa, we call home is a small patch of assorted flowers. Roses, Sunflowers, violets, and tulips. I argued against the roses, but Harry refused to pass up the irony in it. It’s early spring so they are barely being to bloom. When we first moved in, I had mentioned-off-handly- how lovely it would be to have a garden. And not even a week later, I woke to him outside, planting flowers in a neat patch. He looked angelic. In the sun, a light amount of sweat on his hairline, squinting getting his hands dirty for me. If it was even possible I fell more in love, and I still fall in love each and every day.

“I never want you to feel like my career is more important than yours,” he mentioned quietly. He was looking out toward the setting sun but had a relaxed look on his face.

“I know, I just never want you to be unhappy, especially with how much we both travel. I’m willing to give some things up,” I say quietly. It’s true I would be more than willing to turn down the promotion if he asked if he made it clear he would rather stay in our home.

“But you don’t have to,” he breathes coming up to me and holding my face in his hands gently, “Yes, I fuckin’ love it here. But it means nothing if you pass up the opportunities you want.” I look at him and simply nod because I don’t know what else to say. “Everything will be alright, I promise.” He kisses my forehead and steps down toward the table we had set up near the patch of flowers, it was placed strategically so we could sit outside in the evening and watch the sunset. Today, Harry brings out a shirt he has been meaning to finish embroidering, while I decide to use the watercolor paints Gemma had bought me as a Christmas present.

Our evenings are filled with silence more times than not. It isn’t the uncomfortable suffocating silence, where you feel anger thick in the air between you two. No, it’s a silence shared between two people who are so completely comfortable with each other, who don’t feel the need to fill each second with noise. It stems from relationships that are built on empathy and love for one another.

✩✧♥⁂☀☁⁎☽

“Oh fuck, right there….” I let out a breathy moan as Harry sets a slow but deep pace. I look behind and see his head is tipped back, his body covered in a thin sheen of sweat. He’s letting out short pants. The air in the room is thick with the smell of our arousal and the breathy pants we both let out.

“Shit, you’re so goddam tight, ‘s so warm and snug around me……” He hits a particularly sensitive spot inside of me that has my arms collapsing underneath me. I moan loudly as I fill each vein and ridge pulse inside me. He grabs me and pulls me up against his chest, with one hand around my neck and the other gripping my hip, he pounds into me. His fingers are holding onto my hip so hard I know there will be a bruise, it’ll go with the rest that litter my thighs and legs.

He grips my jaw and presses his lips against my ear, grunting into it. I know he’s close because I can feel his rhythm falter. “ ‘m so close baby,” he sounds so close to tears and for some reason, it makes me just want to please him, give him the release he desperately needs.

“Come for me, Harry, please…..god I need it,” When he snaps his hip I let out a small yelp, “I need to feel you, feel how much you love me.” Those words, the ones that let him know he can show his love for me, sends him over the edge and I feel his thick, hot cum spill inside me. He moans a breathy light moan. And that sound alone makes me cum, I clench tightly around him and whimper. He’s still holding onto me while we both try to catch our breaths.

I know he won’t pull out right away because he prefers to go soft inside me. I don’t mind it, there’s something so intimate about it. He gently pushes me onto my stomach while he tries not to crush me.

“My darlin’,” he chuckles, “I love you so, so much.”

“I know Harry,” I smile sweetly at him, “I know, and I love you so, so much more.”

He gives me another goofy grin and pulls his soft member out slowly. I let out a low hiss that empty feeling. As I walk to the bathroom to get cleaned up, the phone in the living room rings loudly. We both groan, hating being disturbed.

“You should probably go get that,” I smirk at him. He gets up and playfully throws a ‘fuck you’ before he heads to the living to see what disturbed our otherwise peaceful night.

I look at myself in the mirror and notice the plethora of small purple bruises that spread over my thighs. At least he didn’t attack my neck, I chuckle. As I grab my face wash and began rubbing it to rid my face of the sweat that accumulated during our activity, Harry walks into the room with his head down.

Somehow I knew, I just knew. Really, there was no way I could know, nothing that night or any of the previous nights would be any clue to what I would find out. It seems silly saying it but the connection we had, made it easy to know when something was wrong with either one of us. And in that moment, in the stuffy bedroom of our home, I knew my world had fallen.

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tomsrebeleyebrow · 4 years

Text

ocean eyes | ho x fem!reader (merman au)

credits to myself for the moodboard

Summary: Sometimes, having a crush might be a difficult matter to deal with... even more when the aforesaid crush turned to not be who you thought it was at first sight.

Warnings: mention of ANGST (suicidal thoughts), language, SMUT including unprotected sex (wrap it up kiddo), lots of gridding and PDA, oral (fem receiving) and a glimpse of handjob.

Word Count: 8.7k (oh my what)

A/N: So... I’M BACK BABYYY, with some hot stuff too 🔥✨ And particularly with this quite original AU that was sleeping in my drafts for like two months and more… oopsie? 😂😅 Also I felt like our Hazza boy needed some love so here we gooo 👀 But oh lord is it good to be back to writing again! Thank you again to all of you who supported me and made me want to come back here 🥺💕 I’d be nothing without you all… So please, enjoy this oneshot, show me your support and there is also a brand new taglist below you can subscribe to if you like my writings (or you can definitely turn your notifications on to know each time I post) 😌🙏🏻

masterlist | ⚠️ new taglist ⚠️ | your support

“Tom, are you sure he's going to be there?”

“I promise (Y/N), I made sure to have Harry and Sam ask just in case. I'm pretty sure he’d be coming only to show off a little and for the free booze as always, but he will be there nonetheless.”

You couldn't help the giddy smile that spread to your lips, clasping your hands together with excitement. Tom was your best friend for three years now and definitely the best wingman you ever knew - true to the rumours, as the brunette was making sure the person you couldn't stop thinking about would participate at this (quite extravagant) vacation Tom decided to organise in the Maldives.

That person had been at a previous get together you had with some friends but as strange as it may have seemed, once knowing his outgoing personality he was such a loner and that made him hard to approach. Harrison, Tom’s best friend. Around your age and incredibly handsome that you couldn't get him out of your mind. These nice blonde locks of hair that turned slightly darker now, slightly curly when too long, a well toned body and not to mention the brightness of his blue eyes, almost translucent but reminding you of the vastness of the ocean.

That boy completely stole your heart... and didn’t really speak to you that much.

It was not that you didn't try to talk to Harrison before but most of the time, he would just ignore you or at some point look disinterested in his surrounding until he would just leave. Today you were more determined. And even if the blond man came off like a snob or a jerk - Tom assuring you he was not at all -, you really wanted to take some time to get to know him.

“Thanks for asking me to join the trip, Tom” you said, “I can't believe you suddenly felt like “taking a break and let’s get wild and free to the Maldives’ really” you beamed excitedly, trotting before your brunette friend while taking a whiff of the air, completely infatuated with the smell of the salty ocean water in the distance.

“Come on, that’s all fine (Y/N)” smiled Tom as he joined your side, “you needed that little vacation anyway.”

“You’re such a div, really… Moviestar...”

“Hey! Don’t call me that now!”

Laughing, you both trailed up the floorboard pathway on the white sand that leaded to the beautiful couples of straw huts on piles. The little floating houses were already teeming with lots of people, most faces you definitely didn’t know at all but you still managed to catch sight of Tom’s twin brothers and some other mutuals friends of yours. A smiling Maldives’ waiter welcomed and guided both of you down the plank pathway to the first straw hut where at least twenty people were already dancing and enjoying themselves. After seeing how extravagant this kind of party could be, you almost regretted wearing a simple white beach dress with your bikini underneath, but everyone else was dressed as casual as you were as well so you felt much better.

After grabbing some punch and chatting with your friends you (finally) found for a bit, you kept looking around for Harrison but it looked like he didn’t arrived yet. At least that was what you thought until you spotted him in the shadow of another straw hut further away, leaning on the rails and staring out at the crystal clear ocean. He was alone there, away from the loud music coming from the other huts mixed with the constant laughers of the guests. You’ve never been more happy to finally find him that you were not going to let any shyness hold you back, and then you made your slow approach towards him.

“Hey Harrison, it's nice to see you again” you began, trying to not seem too excited. “I didn't know you were going to be here...” you lied through your teeth but it was a small white one, as you stepped up next to his right side.

Harrison’s cheek tilted in your direction for the briefest of seconds, giving you a small moment to admire his bright eyes before quickly turning away. A frown ghosted over your lips but you held your ground, trying to start a small conversation with him but nothing you said seemed to interest him. After several minutes of trying and failing just to get him to speak, you leaned out and looked at the water before whispering.

“You must really like the ocean...”

“I fuckin’ hate the ocean” Harrison snapped, startling you it almost made you jump backwards.

His voice was a lot deeper than you imagined, such a tone with a pretty defined accent could charm you right out of your clothes with very little effort. You shook your head at such misplaced thoughts before looking up at his face as Harrison was glaring spitefully into the distance, both his hands gripping the wood banister as if ready to rip it in half.

You never saw such a troubled expression before that you instinctively grabbed the blonde’s wrist and gave his hand a tug.

“If you don't like the ocean, stop giving it your attention and enjoy the party” you interrupted his train of thoughts, surprising yourself by such boldness. “Come dance with me, I promise I'm not as clumsy as I look.”

It was astonishing even to yourself that Harrison allowed you to pull him away to guide him over the center of the empty straw hut you were both in.

“You may have a very goofy face, so I bet you really are clumsy” the blond man snorted, his fine lips quirking up into a grin but you didn't mind at all, specially since he just looked so dreamy with that teasing smile on his face.

You giggled while taking more initiative by sliding one hand around his hip and taking his own in the other, your heart skipped a beat at the way Harrison interlocked your fingers together with his.

“You better not step on my feet” he warned, before sighing, “... not promising I won’t, though.”

Giggling, you immediately took the lead as Harrison slid his other hand to the middle of your back. You gladly fell into his steps, doing your best to prove you at least had some sophistication. No doubt in your mind, you'd be so embarrassed if you did actually step on his foot. On the other hand, Harrison had the perfect build for dancing, even if it felt like he wasn't exactly sure about what he was doing at the moment. It wasn't like it was hard though, just simple stepping you both back and forth to the music with the occasional spin was all he had to do. But still, dancing was not an easy matter for anyone.

Eventually it seemed very natural to step closer to each other, resting your hands on his hips while his own swayed down to your lower back before settling on the curve that started the shape of your bottom. You moved together, getting lost in the heat of his build upper body, unable to stop the hopeful feelings boiling inside.

The music switched to a more beat heavy and bopping rhythm, so you detached only to turn in his grasp and sway your hips back and forth against him. It took literally less than a second for his own hands to slide around your waist and maneuver your behind to rub up against his crotch. Both of you tuned the world out and danced so intimately, it felt like nothing else mattered.

“Maybe you were right, you don't have two left feet after all” Harrison mumbled against the back of your head, pulling his hands back just enough to hold your hips tight and sway you from side to side.

You blushed softly at the way the blond boy curved you into his taller more muscular shape, the heat of his hands and skin giving you courage to delicately rest your own hands on his own hips and meet his movements.

“Thanks, but I'm just following your lead… It feels really nice to dance with you” you whispered to him, momentarily closing your eyes as you leaned back against his chest. "My name is (Y/N), by the way. Tom’s friend. Uhm, I tried talking to you back then at the Brighton party from a few weeks ago but—” you trailed off, forcing an awkward smile even if Harrison couldn't see your face.

“I remember you” Harrison cut off. He huffed, his grip suddenly tightening against your stomach before he purposefully felt down the shape of your legs along your soft dress. “The chatterbox who talked to me for like fifteen minutes even though I never said a word back.”

“O-oh…”

The forlorn tone in your voice was unmistakable as you pulled away from his grasp and tried to excuse yourself.

“I’m sorry, I never meant to bother you… I just wanted to talk…��

Your eyes became a bit glossy. You truly hoped Harrison would remember you but it didn't sound like you left a good first impression. But then his firm hand latched onto your wrist, halting your movement before you could step too far away and instantly yanked you back hard enough to stumble into his chest.

“I never said you could leave, (Y/N)...”

With purpose his other hand slid down to the bottom of your ass, making sure you couldn't escape as he held you still, tightly.

“If you haven't noticed, right now we are doing more than talking. You invited me to dance... s-so let’s dance.”

Once again, you followed his lead as the blond boy began moving you both around the hut. One of your hands was pressing flatly against his chest but soon it slowly shifted up to his shoulder, meeting his movement and curving your body into the posture of his own. It was both heart racing and felt so natural to dance with him that you didn’t really know far that long.

Some time passing, you talked with Harrison while dancing and, like you had promised yourself, got to know him a little more. At first, the boy was the one to ask you tons of questions, not really letting you a second to ask something back but after a bit, you learned that Harrison was an actor, slowly making his place into the industry and the current big project he was working on. He also only came here because the boy like partying in general, also for Tom obviously and for the drinks.

It made you smile, Tom's first hypothesis being correct but you didn't really care about Harrison’s reasons. All that mattered now was that he actually came and was here, with you. He even offered a small excuse for why he was so silent when you tried to talk to him a few weeks ago, as the blonde man had a really stressful day on set and knew if he opened his mouth, it would just be party pooper.

“It's never pleasant for anyone when I'm in a bad mood. So I just stayed silent, but you just went on and on… It was quite entertaining to watch you though” Harrison snickered, watching you puff out your cheeks and call him a jerk for not saying at least something to you, leaving out the part where you thought he was just some player and you weren't pretty enough for him.

Eventually you both got tired of dancing after several songs and went to sit on the stairs which leaded to the sea. While going, you also got a silent thumbs up from a dancing and slightly drunk Tom in another straw hut whom seemed to be wishing you luck, which you were grateful for.

After talking a little more on the wooden stairs, the ocean breeze just felt and smelled really delightful that you pointed down to the wharf and turned to Harrison with a bright hopeful smile.

“We should go for a walk down by the beach!”

“Really now?” Harrison scowled, turning his face away. “The damn ocean is already surrounded us now, why would you even go walk along it…”

With a sigh the boy stood, shoving both of his hands in his dark bermuda pockets and walking away. A frown formed on your lips turning away to grip the bottom of your dress, trying to remain strong as you weren't going to beg him for sure.

“Fine. I'll go by myself… I-I can enjoy the moonlight even if I'm alone.”

Harrison turned back, watching you not even spare him another glance before carefully taking the steps down the hut you were to then walk onto another flootboard path to the front of the beach. Once back on land, you slid off your sandals and smiled at the soft feeling of the still warm sand beneath your feet.

The ocean breeze rustled through your loose hair and the salty smell of the water wafted into your nose as you walked along by the edge of the waves. The cold and clear water lapped at your feet and over your ankles, before you stopped and looked up at the luminous moon casting a beautiful bright glow down against the surface of the water. With a subtle turn, you glanced at both your sides before a small tear ebbed down your cheek.

“I'm always alone… does anyone actually see me?”

You got to dance with who you can qualify as your crush and he finally talked to you tonight… and yet, you were still not satisfied. Way far from being satisfied. You have friends for course, but no one can see how much you were hurt deep inside.

I wish I could just walk out into the ocean and never come back.

Lifting your legs you took a step or two towards the glorious and vast ocean, only to have a warm hand suddenly grab a hold of your wrist. Turning, your eyes widen at the sight of Harrison’s diamond orbs, a tear involuntarily gliding down your cheek that you quickly wiped away with an abrupt turn.

“I see you, (Y/N)” the blonde man said, simply tugging your hand and getting you to step out of the path of the oncoming calm waves so he wouldn't get wet.

“You wanted to walk, right? So let’s walk, come on...”

With a tight but not harsh grip on your hand, Harrison interlocked your fingers and nearly dragged you along beside him as you stepped further down the immense beach of the island.

You'd never been more grateful that Harrison didn’t called attention to the fact that you were crying, even if he clearly heard what you said for sure. The warmth of his palm and slender fingers were incredibly soothing to the loneliness inside your heart. Without even a second thought, you indulged sliding your other hand around his elbow and laying your head on his shoulder.

Just for a moment, that’s all I need...

His beautiful eyes casted down to the top of your head, gritting his teeth wondering why he just couldn't leave you alone... even though the boy had no intention of getting this close to anyone. Harrison leaded the way slowly further down the beach, avoiding the waves and glaring spitefully at the water, hopefully he wouldn't have to get any closer to it, this being his only goal at the moment.

“... thank you.”

“I didn't do anything.”

You smiled slowly detaching from his shoulder, until your hands were the only thing still connected. Even in pure silent but with the sound of the waves in the background, it felt peaceful and not being alone was just a million times better than the expansive loneliness you were consumed with a minute ago. Taking a small leap you pointed up to the wharf and ask if you can walk up there together.

Harrison flared his nostrils but still took you both over to the stairs, guiding your way up until you were walking along the light wooden platform. Slowly you started talking again, realizing for some reason you were just so comfortable with him even if this was only the second time you’ve met within the span of a few weeks.

Even if Harrison had somehow a bit of a moody attitude, you could tell he was not a bad company. When his handsome facial features were fully relaxed and able to laugh and smile, those were some of the best moments but it felt like he had troubles opening up and letting himself have fun.

With the moon at your back and being alone with him, the moment felt so right. So you worked up the courage to ask him “the” question you wanted to since the first time you met. Letting go of his hand you stepped in front of him, pushing back your hair that was becoming delightfully frazzled by the ocean breeze and smiled at him, shyly.

“Harrison, I was wondering… if you had a girlfriend—”

“I do.”

“Oh...” you whispered, the smile on your face faltering for the briefest of seconds but you quickly recovered, not letting it bring you down before you turned around and held your hands behind your back. “I... expected a handsome guy like you to be taken, so I'm honestly not surprised.”

There was suddenly a heavy pang inside your chest, but you couldn’t ask for anything more than what Harrison had already given you.

“I had fun dancing with you, and also got you, the brick wall, to talk” you said while turning back to face the blonde with a gentle expression. “I-I, well I basically had a crush on you— I know it's pretty silly… but you were kind to me in your own way, so thank you. I promise I won’t bother you a-anymore…”

The expression on Harrison’s face kind of made him hard to read, but you were honestly trying to not look as you walk past him, briefly grazing against his hand before trying to make your grand escape.

The thump in your chest throbbed so loudly that it was rather painful and the only thing you could focus on, which was why it startled you so much when the blonde man abruptly turned and grabbed your elbow that your foot missed the platform while you tried to pull away. The next thing you knew was that you were plummeting off the side of the wharf, panic flaring into your eyes and desperately trying to grab onto his arm.

But it was too late. And you were now falling in the ocean.

You squealed in fear, watching Harrison not even waste a single second before diving in after you. Both of his muscled arms wrapped around your body and switched your positions so he was bracing your fall, as you both smacked into the cold waves of the water and instantly sinked below the surface.

It took you a moment but your eyes slowly opened under the cold water, feeling jarred and vision momentarily blurry before they focused on Harrison. Bubbles flubbed from your lips as you called to him and waded through the water until you were finally right in front of him. His expression churned your heart as the boy looked so utterly distressed, so you couldn’t help but cup his cheeks and lift his head to focus on you...

But then, you trailed down and immediately thought this must be a dream.

Below his toned torso was displayed a long and beautiful turquoise colored tail fin covered in scales, a mixed of varied shades of blue shimmering with the moon ray. It was as bright as a freshly full moon, flowered out like it was encased in multiple diamonds. It was definitely the prettiest thing you have ever seen, that you couldn’t help yourself but glide your hand down to pet along its base.

Your fingers barely got to note that bumpy texture before Harrison grabbed your hand and placed his own against your cheek. Your skin warmed as the blond boy pulled you closer and shook his head, a troubled look on his face that you had no idea how to help him before he parted his lips and spoke directly to you, no bubbles coming out of his mouth, just words.

“Why couldn't you just leave me alone?!”

His words were like a stab to your heart that you just darted forward to wrap both arms around his frame, sliding your head over his shoulder flubbing “I'm sorry” to him over and over, until your body started to fall lax and your eyes slid closed, the need for oxygen overwhelming your body. Everything began to fade until you felt him grip your hips, wading his fin back and forth until you were above the water and coughing for air.

With a shove Harrison detached you from his body, watching as the waves carry you back to the shore by the beach. Your eyes fluttered a thousand times, panting and trying to exert more air back into your waterlogged lungs, before focusing on him. The moment your lips parted to call him out, you noted the angry expression on his face before the blond merman turned and dived down back into the water, swimming away at the speed of light.

“W-wait! Please, Harrison!”

You stood there, looking back and forth and as far out into the ocean as your eyes possibly could but Harrison was long gone by now.

“... Please, come back” you slowly whispered, gripping both of your hands over the front of your now heavy and completely soaked dress.

The way your heart thumped into overdrive was almost as painful as the heartbreak you experienced just moments before the fall.

* * * *

After sitting on the shore for the longest time, hoping with all your heart that the blond boy would come back, it became obvious after nearly an hour that he wasn't going to return. Shivering, you walked back towards the main straw hut and waved off all of your friends’ concerns, saying you just went for a little dip in the water.

The party winded down after awhile with everyone departing and respectively returning to their hotel. You went back and waited like a lost puppy on the wharf for Harrison as long as you could, looking out into the expansive beautiful blue ocean and slowly starting to realize why he hated it and didn't want to be anywhere near it.

It’s my fault. He didn't want anyone to know and I forced him to follow me around. He probably hates me now… but I'd just like to know if he's okay.

“(Y/N)!” Tom called out, joining and sliding himself next to you on the wharf. “I was about to head back to the hotel. Want to walk back together?”

He had such a kind and tender smile on his face, almost able to appease you with his slight rosy cheeks due to all the booze he had consumed. If only you'd fallen for someone as gentle and funny as him, maybe you wouldn't be longing for an elusive handsome merman right now.

“Thanks for the offer Tom, but… I think I'd like to stay a little longer, if that’s alright” you spoke softly, trailing off why you wanted to torture yourself any longer but you just hoped so much Harrison would come back.

“That’s totally fine, darling. Some people are still at the party, but don’t hesitate to text me if you want me to come back to not walk alone. Or I can even ask a staff member of our hotel to come here and escort you if you prefer. Just tell me, okay (Y/N)?”

You'd never been more grateful to have a friend you can trust like Tom; lovely, helpful and kind hearted. Stepping forward you surprised him with a hug and a soft thank you. After that, Tom said his goodbye's and left. You waited on the wharf another hour by walking back and forth to look at both sides of it, before deciding to sit at the edge. Almost another hour went by and now, it must of been nearly midnight as your doubts were high that the mysterious Harrison most certainly had no desire to ever see you ever again.

The party in the straw huts finally died down, the staff from the restaurant on the island now actively cleaning the mess done by the guests. Eventually, you laid down on the hard floorboard wharf with heavy thoughts that lulled you into a sleep where you dreamed about the warm and enamoring feelings of dancing against his toned and protective frame.

Some time later the sound of steps resonated on the wooden wharf, soon followed by a heavy sigh as someone bended down next to your side, running delicately the back of his knuckles along your cheek.

“I thought you would have left by now… silly.”

The mesmerizing deep octave of his voice jared you awake, a soft smile curving up on your lips at the sight of his astonishing emerald eyes. The blond man frowned before standing up and pulling away, turning around to immediately walk away from you but you suddenly jolted up to grab the back of his pastel hoodie he was now wearing, desperation in your fingertips.

“I'm sorry, Harrison— I… it's my fault. I won’t tell anyone, I promise—”

“Is that all you wanted to say?”

Harrison’s voice was monotone but his face was full of an abundance of emotions he just didn’t want you to see now.

“Y-Yes…” you whispered, letting go of his hoodie. “... I also just wanted to make sure you were okay, and that you didn’t get hurt…”

You smiled softly stepping up to his backside, placing your forehead against the middle of his back indulging for just a moment.

“Your fin is incredibly beautiful…”

One of his hands clenched over his heart, his brows furrowing together while he gnashed his teeth. When you let go and stepped back, the loss of your heat was actually incredibly startling as Harrison turned towards you, to then notice you already began walking away.

“I'm sorry for annoying you… I'll lea—”

“Stop apologizing when you haven't done anything wrong!” Harrison suddenly hissed, latching his hands onto your body from behind gripping your waist so tight it nearly felt like he was trembling.

The gruff sound of his voice had you flinching and your cheeks warming as he buried his astute chin into the fluffy tresses atop your head. His strong and tight grip seemed almost desperate that you weren't sure what to do but your fingers gently layered over his hands, petting and caressing his knuckles. Slowly, the blond man relaxed until his hold was lax enough for you to turn around and look up at his troubled expression. With a smile, you slid your arms around him and gave him a startling hug.

“I know you probably don't like hugs but… they can make people feel better sometimes.”

Such a soft sentence had his expression soften before his own hands slid up around your back, holding you snugly against his muscular chest. His heart was tranquil and steady like the ocean, maybe even as soothing as those blue waves as well. Harrison even had a delightful soft scent that was kind of addicting.

After a few moments, you parted while looking up at his rugged and handsome face. Those translucent and shining orbs were so alluring, so mesmerizing that within just a few seconds, you were leaning forward and pushing yourself up on your tippy toes until your lips were pressed against each other. His slender digits instantly cupped your cheek and slid the other into your hair where he returned the kiss full force.

Warmth washed over your body and simultaneously the words he'd spoken to you before, that had you detaching so abruptly that Harrison literally growled like a wolf full of primal desire.

“I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do that… But you have a girlfriend… b-but I can't stop myself from falling for you—”

You tried to turn away, but a yelp of utter surprise escaped your lips as the blonde boy tossed you down and pinned you against the floorboards of the wharf, not harshly to not hurt you.

“You're really naive, I don't have a girlfriend” Harrison rasped, cutting off whatever you wanted to say with another rough kiss, shoving his tongue into your mouth and tasting your startled whimper at his sudden furry. However you weren't about to stop him with the revelation that he lied to you.

The moment his hands let go of your wrist, they lifted and hazed right into the back of his messy dark blonde locks. Both of his own paws trailed lustfully down the shape of your womanly curves before pushing apart your legs and sliding his frame in between. Your skin warmed at the intimate contact of your lower halves pressing together, letting out the smallest moan.

“I don't want to get close to anyone, but you… You don't want to leave me alone or get out of my damn mind” Harrison husked, latching onto your bottom lip as he pulled away, giving it a nibble rough enough to have drool ebbing down your chin.

You panted up at him as the blonde man leaned down and trailed his lips along the soft skin of your neck.

"Ah— Harrison, I j-just wanted to get to know you” you murmured blushing, instinctively tilting your head unable to deny the want inside to feel more of his lips as he sucked on a tender piece of flesh here and there, until you could feel small love bites warming your neck.

“Then let’s get to know each other more… I'll start by getting to know your body, since you saw a part of mine I never wanted anyone else to see” Harrison hazed with a husky layer of desire, biting into the ridge of your ear while purposefully groping over the shape of your breasts, slithering his other hand up your dress.

A soft moan escaped your lips as he felt along the curves of your body, where you couldn't bring yourself to deny him and instead pushed at the back of his head just to press your lips back together. You could feel him smirking as Harrison gladly kissed you over and over again while feeling along the shape of your womanhood against your bikini bottoms.

“Ehem, excuse me but—”

Someone’s voice caught both your attention, trying to pause both of you as delicately as possible but your face was still incredibly red when your eyes locked with a waiter from the party as he found you in such a compromising position.

Pushing at Harrison’s chest you got him to sit up, even though he looked very displeased, but you merely grabbed his hand and pulled him along beside you.

“I'm s-sorry! We didn't mean to—… out here!” you softly apologized to the poor waiter but he shook his head, even if his face was slightly pink.

You were grateful you didn’t get caught into a way more embarrassing position, as you delicately leaded you both down the wharf to set foot on the sand again. Harrison didn’t said a single word but it seemed that the blond man was waiting for you to get further away from the restaurant, still along the beach before slamming you up against the closest palm tree, growling about how annoyed he was to be interrupted.

He snapped forward like a viper and claimed many more hot and heavy kisses, while sliding both hands around your hips and gripping the bottom of your ass to press you into his body as hard as possible. You whimpered at his roughness but tried to answer to his fervor, holding around his shoulders and neck as tightly as you could muster.

Sliding down your jaw Harrison bit into the side of your neck, pushing up your summer dress and lifting your legs to wrap around his waist, just so he could grind against your thinly clothed core to his heart content.

“O-Oh! Harrison!” you mewled to him with heavy desire laced in your breath, tossing your head back as you felt how hard he was already in accurate details.

The blonde boy grinned wickedly, relieved you were a woman who could admit your pleasures and not be utterly shy about them. Extending his tongue he lapped slickly along your neck, trailing back up your jaw until you were kissing feverishly once again. His hips swayed back and forth, rocking into your body a most pleasurable rhythm that would of been even better if Harrison was actually taking you right here right now, but the stimulation was there and it was driving you insane.

You moaned into Harrison’s mouth, unhinged until he pulled away and watched you make erotic overstimulated faces and whimper about how close you were already, which had his ocean eyes wild with primal desire.

“Gonna cum already?” teased the blonde merman, never slowing down while pressing the tip of his still clothed girth up and down your slit over and over again. “We only began and yet I can feel how badly you're twitching already...”

You whined loudly at how unfair his words were, gripping the top of his hoodie for dear life as he bounced you into him until you reached the most startling orgasm unraveled. Harrison chuckled as you felt lax over his shoulder, before licking the ridge of your ear.

“Mhm, we're just getting started, (Y/N)... Hold on tight.”

A tired smile formed on your lips as you circled around him with both of your arms and legs, and let him carry you back… to the hotel you’re staying at. Your mind wanders a few seconds about how the blonde Adonis that was carrying you could have guessed the place you were staying at, as it was not the only resorts on the Maldives’ coast.

“I asked Tom before where you were staying… and also your room number, if you’re wondering” Harrison mumbled as if reading your mind, his lips also finding the skin of your neck again.

Still too intoxicated by Harrison’s previous ministrations, you only recognised now the familiar corridor of your hotel which lead to your room. Coming to a stop you heard the sound of a door opening - definitely your room as you caught a glimpse of the number written on it while walking past - then closing right after.

“You also forgot to ask Tom to give you back your key before he left, silly.”

You let out a little chuckle before hearing the click of the door lock and not even five seconds later, you were almost instantly thrown down onto your very soft queen size hotel bed, feeling the soft sheets against your hot skin. Harrison didn’t waste his time and just pulled his hoodie off his body, offering you a nice view of his well defined abs before hovering back on top of you.

“Now, take off your dress” he then possessively husked, staring deep into your eyes as he gave both of your thighs a firm squeeze.

Such a naughty demand had you skin tingling but after pulling you dress up just a smidgen, you surprised him with a mischievous grin before grabbing and tugging at the tail of his hoodie with no second thought about it. Oh, his eyes met your challenge but didn't stop you as he lifted his hands and let you yank it over his head and toss it randomly behind him.

“Want to unzip and take off my pants too, doll face?”

You giggled at his smug smirk and you being a little vixen, you gave the clear outline of his girth a slow stroke enough to elicit a very tiger like growl from his fine lips, before finally pulling up the thin material of your white summer dress and lifting your ass to pull it over your shoulders, letting it drop onto the floor.

His predator diamond eyes narrowed at the erotic site of you wearing a pink cotton candy bikini, which he could already see through your white dress when you got soaked in the ocean. Harrison watched you blush softly as he trailed both of his hands up your slightly tanned curves, but you smiled petting your own fingertips along his chest enjoying the shape of his astute muscles.

“You look like a piece of candy. I don't really like sweets but…”

He tiptoed his index and middle finger up from your belly button and startled you with the yank of your bikini top until it was easily sliding away from your body, leaving your breasts on full display.

“... I'll make an exception for you ‘cause you look rather delicious.”

Oh, his lips were wrapped around the closest nipple in a matter of seconds, his hot and wet tongue utterly divine as he lapped hazy wet circles while using his other hand to roll and pinch the other tit, smirking at the way you gasped his name and arched your back like you wanted more. The shape of his warm fingers were incredibly enticing.

Licking his lips Harrison switched to the other delectable nip, swaying his tongue back and forth, sucking hard enough to induce a juicy wet pop before trailing a warm kiss or two down your stomach. His sharp intense eyes noted the damp area that outlined your intimate lower lips, no doubt from your previous orgasm and the blonde couldn't help the modicum of pride he had for making you feel that good.

With a look up to your eyes, it was almost surprising that Harrison bothered to pause but you wanted him very much, and didn't mind at all to continue this night of pleasure. One at a time he loosened the loops you had on both sides of your bottoms before sliding the thin material away from your body, leaving you completely bare beneath him.

Your entire skin tingled at the way he took in the unhindered sight of of your naked body, but it wasn't that you were overly embarrassed by it… It was the look in his beautiful ocean eyes that admired your frame like he was noting it to memory. From the trail up your legs, to the intimate area of your womanhood, over your stomach and breasts, until Harrison settled on the way your hair perfectly framed your face.

Sliding over your body he leaned up and cupped your cheeks, edging down to capture your lips for a surprisingly soft kiss like he was thinking about something. You couldn't help but appreciate some tender displays of his attraction as you welcomed the sway of his slippery tongue into your mouth and used your own hands to pet up and down his back muscles.

You mumbled some incoherent words with a soft smile as Harrison swished back down to suck passionately against your rosy little buds. He chuckled against your skin while planting wet and hot kisses, sucking every tender piece of flesh your chest had as he trailed down your stomach and licked teasingly over your belly button, delighted with the little wiggle your body did.

“Come on (Y/N), I want to hear my name roll of your lips as I have my fill of your flavour” the blue eyed merman seductively husked, pushing apart your legs only to instantly glide his tongue down your wet slit. He nearly growled right away at the delightful flavour of your essence and even enjoyed the automatic slide of your hands into the back of his hair, moaning his name on repeat.

“Please Harrison... devour me.”

You pleaded in heavy desperation, tossing and turning your head as the blond man answered your desires by shoving his wet muscle deeply into your core and curling it up and down, thoroughly enjoying your womanly juices.

Harrison’s hands gripped your hips pulling you closer to his tongue, his hot and heavy breath of sexual desire hazing against your clit and inner walls forcing you to twitch and spasm with every new pulse of electrifying pleasure he was providing you. Pulling back he gave one of your lips a pop, getting off on the way your entire body trembled as he worked his tongue up to your clit and licked hazy circles before sucking on it like a delicious piece of candy.

“H-Harrison– o-oh f–!”

A wicked chuckle hazed against your intimate parts, sparing you a solitary glance that told you he had no intention of stopping any time soon. Turning back down to his pleasure swollen target, his tongue lapped at your nectar before swirling as he sucked roughly enough to have you writhing in ecstasy. With heavy lustful desire for you to cum on his tongue, Harrison slid a few of his fingers up against your lower lips caressing up and down to entice you in a sensual V-motion before inserting both his index and middle finger. You whimpered loudly and gave his hair an over stimulated yank, that he didn't seem to care about, as he thrusted back and forth in your walls and got off maliciously on how tight and warm your inner folds were.

All your moaning compliments seemed to feed his hungry desires as the blonde gave you a faster rhythm, sloshing your juices and feeling your pulsating walls in excruciatingly accurate intimate detail. It just took a few more seconds of his tongue pressing against your clit for you to scream out his name in the throws of another vision blurring orgasm. Your slick arousal completely coated his tongue and even the tips of his fingers as he pulled away and made it an erotic show to enjoy them thoroughly.

“Mmh, you taste pretty good…” Harrison complemented with a chuckle, watching as your face darkened with a heavy blush before turning away and whispering how much of a tease he was.

“I do like to tease you, but right now… I'd just like to fuck you as hard as possible. Ready, (Y/N)?”

Such a question made every hair on your arms and legs stand on end, as he showed you the clear haze of lust and desire reflected in his pretty diamond eyes. Instead of answering, you sat up for a brief moment and felt along his abs before working the zipper down on his shorts like he asked earlier, and helped rid him of their tight confines.

The sight of his well endowed cock had you biting the bottom of your lip before bravely stroking his length up and down a few times, planting a kiss or two against his chest. His expression softened before tilting your chin up and capturing your lips, too full of desire to enjoy the feeling of your soft fingertips as he pushed you backwards on the bed again to quickly place his stout leaking tip against your entrance.

Even with your warm cheeks you gladly lifted your legs up for him, and snaked your hands around his slender neck meeting the sway of his tongue as he got a nice grip on your hips and pressed his own forward filling you up completely with one deep penetrating thrust.

When he pulled back, you shared similar grins before meeting in the middle for several enamoring kisses. Moving his hands up to your breasts, Harrison trusted the grip of your legs around his lower back before he started thrusting his hips back and forth. Almost instantly drool ebbed down your combined lips, as you mewled haphazardly into his warm mouth.

The blonde man squished and squeezed both of your breasts, rolling your nubs in tune to his movements as he buried his cock deep within your walls, purposefully made it a mission to mess up your insides. It wouldn't take much, since he was already rocking your world more than any man had before and you had no problem moaning it to him.

“Oh, Haz! Y-You're m-making me so dizzy–!” you cried out, throwing your head back at the hot and intense sensation you were feeling.

“You love it for sure– s-shit, you're squeezing me so fucking good...!” Harrison growled, attacking the left side of your neck as he shifted both of his hands to the bottom of your ass, then began to roughly push and pull you to meet with every sway of his hips. The raunchy and addictive aroma of sex filled the air as you moaned and screamed his name, digging your nails into his back, no doubt leaving him some prominent scratches.

After several hot minutes of leaving you an abundance of hard to hide hickeys, the merman pulled back and lifted your legs away from his waist, holding them up to spread wide apart so he could fuck and thrust as deeply into your walls as quickly as he wanted. Drool drizzled down your lips as you pressed both of your hands flatly at his fine toned chest, drowning in the utter euphoria he was giving you.

Your eyes rolled back, pretty whines and whimpers leaving your luscious lips, caressing a hand against his cheek watching his expression soften before he told you to lay back. Once you'd instantly complied Harrison leaned over your body propping up your legs to stay intimately splayed wide apart but he also interlocked both of his hands with yours and held onto you tightly.

You smiled widely against his fine lips as he captured yours, loving the feeling of his long and slender fingers not to mention how incredibly hot and sweaty his entire muscular frame was. This handsome man on top of you was really getting his workout on, and you loved every single bit of the pleasure he was able to give you.

With the lewd swishing of your tongues all over each other, the knot in the pit of your stomach was nearly at its boiling point and with your mouth covered you couldn't tell him. It really didn't matter honestly, you would rather swap saliva anyway as the blonde’s wonderful kisses felt sensational and divine you wouldn't dare give up the flavor of his lips.

Harrison must of felt the same way, as he barely seemed to be breathing during his hot and heavy make out. However he did pull away once he felt the unmistakable throb of your inner walls beginning to convulse against his cock, making him give you the vigor his muscular body could offer a woman like you as he slammed into your core over and over.

As soon as you let out an echoing orgasmic scream, Harrison held your body down and pressed his cock as deep into your pulsating core as possible, making you tremble with the searing hot wave of his arousal filling you up and leaking down your inner thighs, while he pulled away with the most primal grunt of his own desire. Instantly he collapsed down on top of your body, making you groan out how incredibly heavy he was, but your hands still lifted and caressed his back up and down as if trying to soothe him despite how haggard your own pleasured body was feeling.

After several minutes of combined heavy and exhausted panting, Harrison slid to your side where you followed his movement, smiling at him. Lifting you hand you hesitated for a solitary second before pressing it against his astute cheek,caressing his soft cheekbone. His expression seemed relaxed, so you decided to lean closer and give him a small kiss.

Harrison returned your soft peck, sliding one of his arms around your hip and yanking you closer a bit harshly which caused you to make an adorable squeaking noise. The sound of his laughter was alleviating as you pulled away and nestled into his chest, listening to his rhythmic soothing heartbeat.

“Are we even, Mister Merman?” you said with a chuckle.

“It was never about that, silly…” Harrison mumbled while holding you close, finding the smell of your hair softly reminding him the one of the ocean. And the blond man had to admit it was a scent that he found relaxing when on you. “I hate the ocean because I can't control the transformation, as you saw earlier… Being a creature of the sea is a curse, (Y/N).”

A soft frown formed on your face before you placed a tender kiss against the middle of his torso.

“We are opposites then, because I love the ocean so much. Swimming and walking along the beach are very relaxing” you whispered to him, using the tip of your index finger to trace a small circle along his abs, another thing he found soothing.

“That's what I thought at first” Harrison started again, “I grew up in the water but then, I liked being on land so much more that I moved to the city and got the opportunity to have an amazing job. But the sea won't stop calling me... and I can't avoid it. I just want to be free… I want to be human.”

His grip tightened, and it just broke your heart that he felt so trapped.

“I can't cure you, Haz… I-I don't know how to help you but…” you gulped down the fear inside your guts before tilting your head up to admire the handsome features of his face.

“But your fin is so beautiful, shining under the moonlight like diamonds… Please don't resent how enchanting that form is.”

His ocean eyes rose before a tint of enamoring pink dusted his cheeks and he had to look away. Sure people have said he was handsome and all before, but no one has ever said “enchanting” when referring to his true merman form. The feeling Harrison had about you from before came back, the reason he had a hard time avoiding you and getting close.

Turning back to face you his expression was calm and at the same time a little hard to read, but his hand lifted and swayed into the soft messy tresses of your hair before pushing your head forward until your lips softly smooched together for a warm kiss. You enjoyed each other’s flavour for a few seconds then went back to cuddling close together under the sheets.

“I sensed it before” Harrison whispered against your lips, “and I didn't want to admit it but you give me these waves... that are like the ocean. Soft and tranquil, like the morning breeze. But beneath the surface you hide the storm brewing inside, constantly…”

You carefully listened to him, not daring to say a single word as you may know where he was going with that talk.

“Don't do that anymore. I won't let you feel lonely, (Y/N). Ever.”

Tears formed in your eyes. That mixed bag of feelings which composed your person was clearly hard to decipher, even more for someone who didn’t really know you beforehand, but the man in front of you did it. So clearly and astutely it was almost shocking, but you were so grateful it was a man like him.

Lifting both your hands you wrapped them around Harrison’s neck and pecked him softly not just once but twice on the lips, delighted in the teasing little smile adorning his lips before you rested against the pillow in front of him.

“Alright. But I hope… that you will show me your pretty tail fin again, one day” you said, smiling kindly at him.

“Out of all the words, ‘pretty’... really?” Harrison noted, a little blush making its way back on his cheeks with a pout. “At least say ‘enchanting’ again…”

That adorable reaction of his made you giggle, and even if Harrison didn’t dare to say it out loud (yet), that sound ringed beautifully to his ears. Ahe he wanted to preserve it at all costs.

“But if you’re a good girl, I'll show you tomorrow night when no one else is around… and maybe we will do it again in that form?”

“H-Harrison!” you blushed hard in a stutter, not expecting that cheeky remark from the dreamy merman you were sharing your bed with.

As they say, there is a first time for everything...

Oh well.

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