#Complex Family Relationships

[destefaniart]

[sn0wbat]

well what family doesn't keep a secret vampire family member hidden deep in in the basement /s

EDIT: Rest of the comic is now under the cut!

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BONUS:

[shannonsketches]

Why is the anime so weird, it's not even the same series dude?? It's like,

Anime:

GOKU: I have a great idea to bring peace to the universe, and my leadership and compassion alone will unite us all. I have No Flaws and am A True Relatable Everyman :)

VEGETA: NO! I AM THE BEST AND I WILL CAUSE PROBLEMS UNTIL I AM RECOGNIZED AS SUCH!!!!

Manga:

GOKU: Vegeta what's cornmeal made of? I know it's what the corn eats, but what's it made of? VEGETA: Hey Kakarot let's play the quiet game until one of us dies.

[raventreehall]

no one wants to talk about the theon and littlefinger parallels fine I'LL TALK ABOUT THEM. they're both social inferiors in a foster family that they desperately wanted to join but are prevented from doing so which leads to all sorts of complexes!!!

littlefinger didn't really do anything wrong in seeking out catelyn's hand and dueling brandon, he only misread his importance to the tullys and tried to functionally be part of the family that he had been raised in. but that was not allowed to him because of his low birth, just as theon was always relegated to an outsider role within the stark household because he was a hostage. (also note theon's boyhood dream of marrying sansa and ned accepting him as his son; littlefinger's obsession with catelyn seems to actually have catelyn at its core rather than just being a projection of a desire to be accepted within house tully, but who knows, his obsession with cat could actually be the product of an obsession with house tully and his general ambitions to increase his social status). they both had such intense 'i hate you'/'i want to be you' emotions knocking around in their heads as a result of this that they ended up killing—or trying to convince people that they killed—their foster siblings! (i know there's a lot more complexity with the littlefinger and lysa situation, but i think this parallel is really interesting)

littlefinger also had to work for years in gulltown/king's landing to rise through the ranks, to in a way 'regain his standing' to what it was when he was a ward of hoster tully's. throughout his childhood he was constantly around lysa, catelyn, and edmure—all of whom were destined to become lords and ladies of great houses—and was raised like their brother, but after he is banished he struggles to hold even half the status that his foster siblings enjoy naturally. theon goes through a little bit of a similar rude awakening when he arrives back at pyke expecting his father to hail him as his heir returned only to find out balon could not care less about him and likes asha way more, and he takes winterfell to try to prove to balon and the rest of the ironborn that he should be respected. interestingly, we have seen both theon and littlefinger's homecomings on page and they both come across as complete outsiders in the places were they were born, acting above their station because of the circumstances they got used to during their fostering—while this leads to theon trying to reject the starks and gain acceptance from his birth family in acok, in asos when littlefinger goes home to the fingers he wants to get to the eyrie (and to one of the tullys) as quickly as possible

they share some behaviors/character traits, too. littlefinger is noted to dress well, he pays a lot for clothes made of fine fabrics, while we know that theon likes to do the same. littlefinger certainly does this to prove that he is rich and powerful and has made it, showing that he can pay for the same things that any great lord can, which is probably born from more than a little resentment towards hoster for taking him out of the luxury of riverrun and sending him back home to the fingers. similarly, theon dresses elaborately to set himself apart in winterfell, to impress people, and to make himself known, and again this is born from resentment and insecurity (seen best when he goes back to pyke and stresses about what to wear in front of balon). they're also both arrogant and flippant, with a tendency to smile/make jokes too much, perhaps to try to further resist and disparage the social order they feel restricted by

finally there's catelyn: theon looks to her as a quasi-mother figure while he's in winterfell and littlefinger looks to catelyn as a lover, but both of these are impossible and end up being rejected. there's no evidence that catelyn was, like, especially mean to theon, they seem to get on fine in agot, but he was her husband's hostage and we know that she does mistrust him. this attitude is obviously a result of her not trusting the greyjoys because they're reavers/rose against the crown in open rebellion, but it is also no doubt informed by her previous experiences with petyr! it would make sense for her to be wary of a foster son getting close to her children after what happened to her as a kid

[ghostbeam]

One thing about me?? I’m gonna fall in love with the asshole older brother

[plutonicbees]

impulse '95 is a really good comic run bc the homies r just out here having mommy issues

[hgduo]

Ouchies but also vindication- yeah q!Bad does NOT view q!Cellbit as his kid! He cares about him a lot, was a guiding figure in his life, and it hurts him badly to see Cellbit fall apart like this- but he does not see him as his kid.

If anything at most it's an uneven sort of bond, because Cellbit looks up to Bad a lot and values his affirmation- possibly in a paternal way but ultimately as far as Bad is concerned they are not father and son- as far as Cellbit is concerned he never had a family-

Maybe something close to that feeling at best- something better defined as mentor and protege perhaps- but they were on the battlefield, their was no room to be 'family'

and at the end of the day, Bad is going to chose his kids no matter how much that path hurts

Even if it means letting the fire burn

[uncanny-tranny]

Hi! would you by any chance have tips on how to get a binder when your parents refuse to buy you one? ☹️

That's definitely a sensitive and complex answer, and while I might not know of the best option for your unique situation, there are some ways you can go about this.

If it's a foregone conclusion that you cannot convince them of this, what I used to do is DIY my binder. The ways I primarily did this were:

Option One: Wearing a camisole that was one size smaller than I actually was (so, wearing a small instead of a medium, for instance), then folding it up over my chest. As a disclaimer, this may only work well if you are smaller in the chest

Option Two: Layering two sports bras in my size over each other. Some of the DIY tips I found before I got a traditional binder advised to wear one sports bra in your size, then wear another sports bra backwards in a size smaller. I would advise against this for potential safety reasons, but also because (at least personally), it can be ineffective and a waste of resources.

Some people have also had friends or other family members order their binder for them, but this can be risky, depending on your situation. While I don't know the ins and outs of your specific circumstances, risk management is important to me, so I would recommend this if it is a risk that is acceptable to make.

I understand what it's like to not have access to this resource, so what I will do is advise you against:

Binding with ace bandages (I did this before (multiple times, in fact, because of dysphoria), and believe me, not only did it hurt like hell, but it constricted my body so heavily that I may have done long-term harm)

Wearing a DIY binder (or any kind, for that matter) for longer than your body can handle

Doing DIY in such a way that even mimics binding with ace bandages. This means that your binder shouldn't constrict your ribs, breathing, or range of movement

Here are some general good practices that you should use to guide you for any type of binding, whether traditional or DIY:

When you start binding, only do so in very short sessions to begin with. While binding shouldn't outright hurt, it can be a weird transition while your body is getting used to that new sensation

Minimize heavy lifting or exercise while binding. If it is unavoidable, drink plenty of water and take plenty of breaks

Stretch after binding

Don't bind while sick or have inflammation in your lungs or chest

If you DIY, treat your binder like it is a traditional binder. Don't make the mistake of assuming you don't need to listen to your body because you aren't using a "traditional" binding method

Ultimately, listen to your body. If it is telling you that it needs a break, honour that. Your body isn't punishing you, it is trying to keep you (and it) safe, even if it doesn't feel like it

In the end, this isn't perfect. Sometimes, parents do come around, even in their own ways, even if little by little, they come around. When I first came out officially around 2016, I was convinced that my transition would be completely forbade by my family; I concealed a lot of it in the worst instances of this. However, now, I think most of my family has come through their own journey with the understanding of the reality of what and who I am. I tell you this, anon, because I want you to know that this, too , shall pass. You can make it. I know this might be devastating to you, and believe me, I know what that's like. But it won't be forever. These bridges aren't burnt forever, and I hope you can find your happiness and contentment wherever it may be.

[aceofworlds]

"What's your love language?"

Utter devotion & fervent worship.

[backjustforberena]

Viserys & Rhaenys throughout the years.

[transmascutena]

thinking about how akio sees his younger self in utena and wondering if there's any fondness there. doesn't change the horror of what he does to her obviously but i do wonder

[serenescribe]

I’m curious - how do you see the dynamic between Malleus and Lilia? Like, how do you think they feel about each other?

hello anon!! i'm actually very excited to answer this question, so thank you for sending it in!

i know many people interpret diasomnia as a family. i do too! but i don't ascribe to the notion that lilia is the dad, and the other three are his sons. i like complicated relationship dynamics, and while i understand the appeal of having lilia as the father taking care of his three varying children, i just don't gel with it too much ;; the only true familial relationship in diasomnia, to me, is lilia and silver; lilia's relationships with the others are different.

(getting a little long so i'll put the rest under the cut)

regarding malleus and lilia's dynamic, i view them more like a guardian (lilia) and his ward (malleus), as opposed to father and son. the relationship between them seems less familial and affectionate than it is with silver and lilia — and going into chapter 7 spoilers here, we can see in silver's flashbacks just how loving lilia is of silver. they are, undoubtedly, father and son.

but with malleus, there always seems to be a distance between him and lilia. malleus has always been above lilia in status, even before he hatched. and that makes for quite the interesting dynamic, wherein lilia raised malleus even before he hatched, with chapter 7 implying that it took lilia's love over a few centuries to finally hatch malleus. but that very hierarchy of class, with malleus as prince and lilia beneath him, means that while lilia may have taken care of malleus all his life, he could never stand on the same level as him as an equal. and that, in my head, translates to the relationship of a guardian and ward: lilia has taken the responsibility of raising malleus and caring for him, but there is little room for the open affection and familiarity that flooded lilia's own upbringing of silver.

that being said, i learnt a while back of a possible interpretation wherein malleus feels a one-sided father-son bond with lilia. and i really adore that! because for malleus, the difference in their status may not be as evident to him; he may only ever have known lilia as the one who took care of him, who was there for him since he first came into the world. it also means he would feel quite envious of the free and easy father-son bond lilia and silver have, since it's something he never got to experience for himself. but i doubt that they'll ever be able to reconcile this, given that lilia feels a very different way than malleus does. it's not that lilia doesn't care for malleus, but i just don't think it reaches that same level of familial affection that he has for silver.

again, thanks for letting me ramble about my thoughts! :D

[werewolves-are-real]

I keep promising myself that ONE DAY, I will do enough research into 1800s China to write a proper Temeraire fic taking place there. But there's sooooo much I would want to research first. Even if I skimmed over court details as much as possible - which I don't want to do, tbh - it would just feel very shallow. And it's hard to properly flesh out any characters without any understanding of court life, dynamics between different classes... also just, you know, common beliefs? Attitudes? Religious beliefs too, etc etc.

One day! Hopefully. And we just get so little of Mianning (much less the other Chinese characters) it's hard to do them justice :( Doesn't help that no one really wants to tell Laurence or the aviators what they're actually thinking lol.

[thaliasthunder]

no bc the way nico must've been deeply crushed by percy that he never cursed him tho he had all the reasons in the world to do it? if percy had to deal w nico's curse w the arai monsters in tartarus he would've straight up died there

[yfere]

It is also a little sad -- Misaki and Kazuki both seem to take Miri’s love of the other as some sort of indictment of their parenting, or an indication that they have not proved themselves worthy to be loved by her. And neither of them really seem to process Miri’s insistence that she does love both of them without reservation -- it’s just that she has the childish hope that loving both of them means that everyone can live together under one roof with her. If she were a little more devious and a little less polite, Miri would have probably tried to parent trap everyone into living together.

[zabiume]

on a slightly related note, i know we joke about ichigo being a dumbass (and sometimes he is), but he's also so much smarter than people give him credit for. i remember initially being frustrated by chapter 479, where ichigo "forgives" ukitake and soul society for stalking him using the combat pass, but i trust ichigo and it's interesting to see in retrospect that this is the same chapter where ichigo asks them to let him take ginjou's body back. the shinigami express outrage at this, and soi fon and shinji specifically mention all the awful things ginjou has done (especially to ichigo's family and friends), but ichigo says "it's not about forgiving or not forgiving; he was a deputy soul reaper"

this is essentially ichigo saying to soul society, "give him dignity for his services and i can trust that you'll do the same for me when my time comes." while ginjou went full-hostile-mode against soul society, ichigo plays his cards a little more cleverly. soul society needs ichigo, and ichigo needs his shinigami powers, so he's willing to take the first step of forgiving their transgressions so they'll (hopefully) pay him the same respect