#Ends with Cain again what a special boy that boy is

[tracle0]

These characters will not show up again but LOOKIT WRITING

[harajuku-cookie]

Letters

Note: this was something that's been on my mind for a long time now and I finally took the plunge to write it. In my IkePri OC, Rosalia's profile, I wrote how even before they met as adults, that Rosalia and Gilbert were penpals as children. I wanted to expand on that point and so here it is!

Pairing: Gilbert von Obsidian x OC (Rosalia) (pre-relationship)

Rating: General

Tags: childhood friends, penpals, spoilers for Gilbert's route

CW: vague mentions of domestic abuse, brief mention of death (minor characters)

When Rosalia was younger and still living as Rosalie Cain in her father’s estate, the one thing she found solace in was a traveling book seller named Akatsuki. He would deliver books that were used for schooling, reading for leisure, or reference material. Even though Rosalia did get the short end of the stick, she still somehow managed to get a book or two on delivery day. Akatsuki noticed that she read a lot of advanced stuff for her age, similar to a certain boy who would pop by his stall back in the capital.

One of the days when he was at his stall, a young Gilbert came by to pick out a new book and that’s when Akatsuki recalled Rosalia. He made a comment to Gilbert about a girl a bit younger than him also being interested in the same reading material as he was. Gilbert became excited to hear that there was another child who understood those kinds of books and wished he had a chance to become her friend too. He asked if she lived in town to which Akastuki responded that no, she didn’t, she lived on the outskirts, and that’s when Gilbert got an idea. He loved receiving letters and writing them himself, especially with his mother and brother, Albert, back in Obsidian. Why not also write letters to this girl too?

Gilbert asked if he could write her a letter and for Akatsuki to deliver it to her. Akatsuki knew how lonely Rosalia was. He wasn’t one to pry into other people’s business, but even he could see the signs of mistreatment the poor girl went through. Each time he saw her, it was like seeing someone’s heart turn black, a scary concept for a child so young. The only moment where he saw a spark of joy was when she was handed a new book, the tiniest of smiles on her face and the softest thank you was uttered. He felt for her and decided at that moment that she deserved so much more than what she received, so he accepted Gilbert’s request.

The next time Akatsuki visited the estate again, he decided to go to Rosalia first. He handed her a new book Gilbert had picked out for her with his letter hidden inside. Akatsuki told her the same story he told Gilbert, but in reverse about a young boy who also loved reading the same books as her. He wanted to be her friend, but knew she was far away, so hopefully she’ll read his letter and become penpals, using the book as a starter conversation. Rosalia couldn’t believe it. Someone wanted to be her friend? Genuinely? It was a tiny glimmer of light, but she wanted to hold it close. She asked if he could come back to her after delivering books so she could quickly write a response. After accepting and going on his way, Rosalia scurried off to her room and sat in a corner to open up the letter. Even though she never met this boy before, he could feel genuine kindness overflowing from every word. At that moment she knew that he, who she now knew from his signature as Gil, would become something special to her.

Rosalia knew she didn’t have much time before Akatsuki was done, so she tried to cram as much as she could into her response letter, still making sure to put care into it, and signing it off as Rose. The moment where she handed off her letter was the start of something new. From that point on, Akatsuki would be the middleman to secretly deliver these letters to and from Gilbert and Rosalia. Gilbert was happy with his new friend and finally after seeing her heart darkened for so long, Rosalia started to look happy. Akatsuki knew it couldn’t fix everything, but if it brought some kind of happiness, then it was something. These letters were so special to Rosalia that she made sure to keep them in a special box where her siblings couldn’t damage them maliciously. As she waited for the next letter, she would lovingly re-read his past letters, where they wrote about the books they’ve read to things they liked to silly stuff that children their age would talk about. He even talked about how his mother used to read him fairytales about a prince dancing with his beloved and how he hoped he could do that too. Rosalia may have been young, but she hoped that someday, maybe she could be the one he danced with, that he would whisk her away from the sad life she lived and live happily ever after, just like in the fairytales.

When it got to the point in Rosalia’s life where she was finally going to make her big escape in Akatsuki’s book cart, she took whatever she could bundle up with her, including Gilbert’s letters, and went off onto a new life. Around the time Akatsuki had decided to take her in, that’s when the letters from Gilbert stopped since he went back to Obsidian, which Rosalia only knew as him going back home in his latest letter. She was bummed that she narrowly missed meeting him, but hoped that she would someday be able to. She was thankful to him for helping to keep her heart from turning completely black and giving her hope that kindness prevails and wished that she could repay him.

What Rosalia didn’t know was that Akatsuki had now started doing what Gilbert had done for her, but in reverse when he noticed that Gilbert’s heart was turning black in the aftermath of his mother and Albert’s execution. Akatsuki would tell Gilbert the stories of that same little girl now residing in the capital and living a much happier life and doing the best she could to spread that joy in others, whether it was a helping hand or a kind word.

What she also didn’t know was that her wish of meeting that boy and dancing with him would be granted years later at the goodwill gala hosted in Rhodolite, where Gil and Rose would finally meet as Gilbert von Obsidian and Rosalia Espinoza.

[jaimehwatson]

20 Questions for Writers

tagged by: @sybilius thank you! <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

I'm currently sitting at 99! I'll have to do something a little special for my 100th :)

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

214,959

3. What fandoms do you write for?

The ones I've written for the most are Our Flag Means Death, Warhammer 40K (mostly the Ciaphas Cain series, my favourite boy), Snowpiercer (the TV show), and Sharpe! But there are quite a few more I've written at least a one-shot for - I get inspired by a lot of different things, and I also love exchanges like Yuletide!

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Restless Nights (OFMD)

You're the sun that makes me shine (OFMD)

Want to do something weird? (OFMD)

The Hidden Places Where The Fire Burns Hot And Bright (Stranger Things)

Sounds kind of dumb when I say it, but it's true: I would do anything for you (OFMD)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Almost always! I really appreciate nice comments so I make sure at least say thanks :)

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

The first one that came to mind was one of my Sherlock Holmes fics, Some things you do just to see how bad they make you feel, which deals with Holmes's depression and drug use negatively affecting his relationship with Watson. It's a really sad one that I didn't come back to add a happier sequel to until a year later!

But I've written some pretty angsty Our Flag Means Death ones too, particularly I hope it stays dark forever, I hope the worst isn't over and It isn't that much fun, staring down a loaded gun

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I think a lot of my fics are pretty happy! If I'm not writing something fucked-up and sad I'm usually writing a happy couple having good sex and a generally nice time. But if I had to try to pick one, maybe my little trilogy What makes Ed happy?, which gets a sweet Ed/Stede reunion at the end

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I've fortunately avoided that so far! The comments I get are 99% lovely and maybe like 1% something kinda weird that maybe comes across a little bit negative but just makes me shrug my shoulders and say oh well

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Often! If there's any particular kind I gravitate towards it's probably characters slightly awkwardly but excitedly exploring a bit of light BDSM for the first time

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

One of the first fics I posted on Ao3 was a crossover between Death Note and The X-Files called The エクス-Files! (Translator's note: エクス means X) It was a really fun writing experience, and if that idea sounds fun to you at all, you should definitely check it out

But my craziest crossover (and maybe my only other one so far unless I'm forgetting something) is definitely my 2023 Yuletide fic Danger and Dance, in which Remington Steele and Laura Holt investigate a mystery involving DJ Crazy Times of "Planet of the Bass"!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of, is that a thing people do?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don't think so but I'd be honoured if someone did!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have not yet co-written anything that's published anywhere, but a good friend and I once put quite a bit of effort into a story taking place in the universe of The Dark Crystal like a decade ago - now I want to dig that up again and see if it was any good, I remember we had fun with it!

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Ciaphas Cain/Amberley Vail! The Ciaphas Cain books and Warhammer 40K in general were what really got me into writing fic regularly and participating in fandom more. Part of what made the ship so initially appealing to me, beyond just how much I like the characters, was that they're 100% canon but their relationship isn't the focus of the canon - you just get little hints and references to the fact that they're definitely fucking offscreen while the main thing going on is fighting aliens and shit. So it provides a great opportunity to speculate about what goes on when they're alone together and you don't see it, and how it might tie into their character development and the events of the canon storylines.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I mostly write a lot of shorter fic, so I don't really have any longer WIPs that gradually fizzled out the way I know some other writers struggle with. That being said, I do have plenty of sparse drafts that I started writing or outlining a little bit of and then never sat down and finished because I got distracted by some other idea. One that comes to mind was a Warhammer 40K fic that would have involved Cain and Yarrick meeting and getting involved in a Wild-West-style saloon shootout in space - fun idea but it never really went anywhere

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm pretty good at character voices, especially when I write fic for books I love and I can imitate the style of the narration

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I don't think my description is as good as my dialogue. A lot of my writing experience before I got into fic was in theatre and video games, two mediums where you're much less likely to have a narrator, so I don't have as much practice at it. I find it difficult sometimes to really get across the image in my head in a way that makes sense and flows naturally. But I do think I'm getting better at it all the time!

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've never really done that beyond the occasional word here and there! If I was going to, I'd want it to be a language I can actually speak, and/or have a friend who speaks it look over it. Maybe one day I'll get to use my French skills in a fic but it hasn't happened yet!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

In the sense of actually deciding "I am going to write fanfic and put it on the internet for other fans," it was the Pathologic games! But in a more general sense, I've been making up stories about my favourite characters since I was a little kid. A while back my mom found something I wrote in high school based on Lord of the Flies that was really cute

20. Favorite fic you've written?

My proudest accomplishment is my OFMD wrestling AU, Tonight on Ring of Revenge!

Tagging @augustmourn @grandmastattoo @the-girl-with-the-algebra-book @scyllas-revenge if you feel like it!

[kibbits]

Because I love the idea of the animatronic found family, Monty and the boys are definitely Cain siblings. It’s on sight teasing, pranks, etc. As mentioned in the song stim ask, he can overstep and push too hard, but this gator got a soft spot for the ‘newest’ editions so he’ll eventually apologize in his own Monty fashion. As a fellow catwalk dweller, him and Moon will stalk gator golf’s rafters, looking for the clubs they lost after the last miniputt party or strategizing pranks. Occasionally they’ll have a ‘Namecalling’ contest where it’s just Monty slinging whatever google can provide him until his old programming kicks in and it’s Southern insults meet Shakespeare. If anyone knows what it’s like to be stifled by Fazbear’s cookiecutter mentality, it’s Monty, and while he may not have perfect solutions, he ain’t gonna scoff when a couple security bots end up crunched after a particularly terrible day. Hey, maybe they’ll get him to pick up banjo again (after of course convincing him that banjo rock exists and is actually cool, you get strangely chill covers of Metallica [Master of Puppets is surprisingly soft])

Hi hello!! (sorry for the delay!) Thanks for the ask!!

Yeeees, absolutely!!! Now that you mention it, Moon in particular has a lot in common with Monty (though they both like him) with the catwalks and the mischief/anarchy dfljdgl and also with being shoved into the role of the 'aggressive/scary' one.

Oh HELL yeah, the insults thing is hilarious, and also I fucking love bluegrass!!! Went to listen to the banjo cover and I love it!! > : )) Idk if you've ever seen the 2CELLOS thunderstruck video but it's also great ehehehe

Also The Dead South, Mumford and Sons, Poor Man's Poison, Fish in a Birdcage, The Dreadnoughts (though that's more polka punk I think?) Long story short I love folk/work songs and unusual instruments. I go wild when I head someone play the saw (yes, the tool dfjkld)

The rest of it (Monty talk and impromptu STAFF actor/stuntbots brainstorm) under the cut for space : OO

But yeah! The only thing is I think that the boys wouldn't harm STAFF bots ever since their rehabilitation, though! They probably convince Monty not to, either - STAFF bot sentience (or not??) is kind of iffy in Break a Leg! They're aware that STAFF bots don't exactly get the chance to be repaired - they're just scrapped, usually. (And YN WILL cry! They have favorites they gave stickers to! Yes I am projecting fjkldgkl)

But!! destruction of property is fair game : ))) Honestly I think Fazbear should embrace Monty's destructive tendencies and give him a Rage Room attraction!!! They could even make it Monty Golf themed and repurpose and rent/sell those warped golf clubs pff

Monty would be SO good at coaching and protecting the kids!! He'd make safety sound cool and hype them up so well to do a gator roar and destroy things!! He'd relate well with kids and teens who need to go a lil bit apeshit sometimes I think. Like, even if you're a 'big kid' and in that phase where you think the stuff you used to like is cringey, I think a huge punk gator with a mohawk that encourages property destruction is pretty cool dffgd

Actually,, , back up. In true ADHD fashion, the STAFF bot thing just made me think of the STAFF bot actors.

I think that they probably... Unionize their co-actors, for lack of better word??? Like - Before Incident, you got a rotation of STAFF bots that delivered lines in monotones and often got destroyed and trashed.

Post-rehabilitation, I think they might have a more regular cast of STAFF bots, with only a few of them being designated (volunteer??) stuntbots who CAN be mangled when the script calls for it, BUT their sensors are disabled in advance AND have a dedicated mechanic to make sure that they DO get repaired, and get repaired fast!! Maybe even specialized features like loose arms sockets with wifi signal connection so that they can be """torn apart""" and put back together painlessly backstage in seconds!!

Maybe it's like the test bots in Portal 2 (or Yes Man's securitrons) in that their personality is on a Cloud, so only the shell gets destroyed? And the cast of bots get special treatment/do meet and greets, too, a bit like disney mascots of less human characters who don't talk but they'll walk around and wave/emote.

Now I'm also thinking that maybe they still have the prerecorded voice lines/automated voice, so maybe they have human voice actors that voices their lines over the mic or play narrator, like they're reading a story and only the boys get to have their own voices??

Food for thought!!! Thanks for the ask again! <33

[ofstoriesandstardust]

you drews stars around my scars teaser (j.c.m.)

note: this is my same mistakes AU that has turned into it’s own entity. a healthy dose of Icemav and Hangster (although not featured in the teaser). the squadron name is subject to change.

warnings: alcohol, swearing, unedited

It ends on a Tuesday.

It ends on a Tuesday, when the line becomes crossed again, the time one that can’t be uncrossed.

It ends on a Tuesday, when both are too drunk for their own good, both too in love with the other to let the other out of their sights.

-

You don’t remember when the line was first crossed, moving between co-workers to friends.  

You remember a collection of nights, spent together in bars scattered across the world, deployment days on the ocean when the sky felt so expansive and everything within reach. Nights of drunken giggles, driving through foreign towns you’d never see again under a sky full of stars. Days of gleaming sunlight and loud laugh over the communication set as you took on the world together.

You just remember that there was a before and after, a before life with your best friend and after him, knowing that the days after him were the best of your life.

-

It begins on a Friday.

A night out at the local bar with your squadron, awaiting a new wingman. The drinks are flowing, the laughter loud, when he finds you first.

He strolls towards the bar, shoulders set back, sure of himself. Poppy, the only other female pilot in your squadron, nudges you as the boys laugh, pointing him out.

“New eye candy.” She whispers in your ear, eliciting an eye-roll from you.

“More like fresh meat.” You whisper back. “What have I told you about getting involved with other pilots?”

She shrugs your shoulder, feigning an innocuous look as she takes a sip of her drink. “I can look.”

Still, you can’t help but look his way, eyes following him as he takes his beer from the bartender and makes his way towards the group. He locks eyes with Ruby, the youngest of the squadron, who’s earned his callsign from his natural brown-red hair that glows in the sunlight of the cockpit.

The man breaks out into a grin, pulling him into a hug. “Coyote, long-time no see. What’re you doing here man?”

Coyote smiles back, clapping the man on his shoulder. “Re-assignment orders. Was supposed to get in last night, but got delayed. I’ll start on Monday.”

Ruby’s grins grows ever wider. “No way. Any idea what squadron you got assigned to?”

The man’s eyebrows quirk as he thinks for a minute. “The Cobras, I think?”

If it’s even possible, Ruby’s smile grows. you think if he smiles any wider it’ll split his face open in two. “No way man, you’re with us! You must be Orion’s new wingman!” Ruby exclaims, pointing to you. You nod in greeting as he swivels to face you, offering you a soft smile.

He extends his hand, smile still etched on to his face. “Coyote.”

You return the handshake, noting his firm grasp. “Orion.”

His lips quirk upwards in a smirk. “Orion, huh? Like the constellation?” You nod in confirmation. “Why do they call you that?”

You slip past him, taking the darts Ruby is holding out to you. “Wouldn’t you like to know.”

-

It changes on a Sunday.

The noise in the Hard Deck is loud, the jukebox roaring when you come out of the bathroom.

Recalled from halfway across the world, seeing your surrogate father sat at the bar was a more than welcome sight, even if Penny did seem to be giving him grief. You arm easily slides across the back of his leather bomber jacket as his attention is drawn from his beer to you. You wrap your arm around his, sitting in the bar stool next to him.

He smiles wide. “Hey kiddo. Didn’t expect to see you here.”

You give a half-shrug, not letting him go. “Got special detachment orders. You wouldn’t happen to know anything about them, would you?”

He smirks, taking a sip of his beer. “Your Dad said something about you getting new orders.”

You hum, shifting on your seat. “And what about you? Thought you’d be out in the desert for a few more weeks.” He gives you a non-committal grunt. “You piss off Cain? Again?”

He gives you a smile, taking another swig of his beer before responding. “Something like that.”

You sigh dramatically, leaning up against the bar. “Don’t worry, I’ve already heard about your emergency ejection over buttfuck nowhere Idaho.”

He raises an eyebrow. “That’s classified.”

You shoot him a look. “I’m one of your emergency contacts. And, you really think Dad’s not going to tell me my other parent exploded over the middle of nowhere in a different state?”

He tilts his head in concession when your callsign gets shouted from across the bar. You turn, finding the gaze of your wingman and his blond buddy that’s been glued to his side since you walked through the door. You roll your eyes, turning back to Pete.

“You should go over there.” He says, nodding his head to the pilots. You sigh, begrudgingly standing from your seat. “Don’t stay out too late though, your Dad wants to see you.”

You nod, letting go of the hold you’ve had on the man who’s only ever exuded a comfortable presence. “Oh, trust me. I’m just here to make an appearance and than I’m going to be having a date with a burrito on the couch.”

He chuckles, squeezing your hand. “See you at home.”

You make your way over to the pool table, where Coyote and Blondie have migrated.

[hugintheraven]

So, Rolling Stone released a list of the "50 Most Inspirational LGBTQ Songs of All Time". And even accounting for the source, it's really bad. Like, "if someone posted this as their Pride playlist they're coming out as straight" levels of bad. I'm not a music person and I'm in awe of it.

The example songs from their tweet linking to it:

#48 Kelly Clarkson, "Stronger" #40 Ariana Grande f/ Zedd, "Break Free" #22 Beyoncé, "Break My Soul" #14 Mariah Carey, "Hero" #3 Katy Perry, "Firework"

Full list below the cut in case you want to avoid giving them clicks but still want to melt your brain.

50 Calum Scott 'Rise (Sam Feldt Remix)' 2022

49 Ethel Cain 'American Teenager' 2022

48 Kelly Clarkson 'Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)' 2011

47 Martha Wash 'Carry On' 1993

46 Christine and the Queens 'Tilted' 2015

45 Years and Years 'Shine' 2015

44 Brothers Osborne 'Younger Me' 2022

43 Guy Sebastian 'Standing With You' 2021

42 Goldford 'Walk With Me' 2020

41 Mika 'Happy Ending' 2007

40 Ariana Grande feat. Zedd 'Break Free' 2014

39 Ellie Goulding 'Anything Could Happen' 2013

38 Bronski Beat 'Smalltown Boy' 1984

37 Britney Spears 'Stronger' 2000

36 Vincint 'Be Me' 2021

35 Kacey Musgraves 'Rainbow' 2019

34 Janet Jackson 'Together Again' 1997

33 Kylie Minogue 'All the Lovers' 2010

32 Sam Smith feat. Demi Lovato 'I'm Ready' 2020

31 Macklemore & Ryan Lewis feat. Mary Lambert 'Same Love' 2012

30 Betty Who 'Somebody Loves You' 2013

29 Hayley Kiyoko 'Girls Like Girls' 2015

28 Sia 'Bird Set Free' 2015

27 Jessie J 'Who You Are' 2011

26 Lizzo 'Special' 2022

25 Miley Cyrus 'The Climb' 2009

24 Kesha 'We R Who We R' 2010

23 Taylor Swift 'You Need to Calm Down' 2019

22 Beyoncé 'Break My Soul' 2022

21 Alaska y Dinarama 'A Quien le Importa' 1986

20 Queen 'I Want to Break Free' 1984

19 Stephanie Mills 'Never Knew a Love Like This Before' 1980

18 Elton John 'I'm Still Standing' 1983

17 Keala Settle 'This Is Me' 2018

16 Donna Summer 'I Feel Love' 1976

15 Brandi Carlile 'The Joke' 2018

14 Mariah Carey 'Hero' 1993

13 David Bowie 'Heroes' 1977

12 Diana Ross 'I'm Coming Out' 1980

11 Madonna 'Express Yourself' 1989

10 Gloria Gaynor 'I Will Survive' 1978

9 George Michael 'Freedom' 1990

8 Sara Bareilles 'Brave' 2013

7 Cyndi Lauper 'True Colors' 1986

6 Muna 'I Know a Place' 2017

5 Rina Sawayama 'Chosen Family' 2021

4 Kacey Musgraves 'Follow Your Arrow' 2012

3 Katy Perry 'Firework' 2010

2 Christina Aguilera 'Beautiful' 2002

1 Lady Gaga 'Born This Way' 2012

[autism-archey]

@hunter-sylvester tagged me in this, my very first tag game, so thanks hunter!! you are a pioneer of Metal Lords fan content, pls keep doing what you're doing!

3 Ships:

steddie, but listen, i don't Like season 4 of stranger things. i think the plot/writing was bad actually, but. i stuck around for steve, because damn they're good at writing characters and i loved his seasons 1-3 arc. steve & eddie have incredible chemistry that everyone else has already talked about but listen bro. what if they were t4t.

frerard, but listennn its for the DYNAMICS. i feel like frerard fics have like, mythologized this pairing into something distinct from those real people that are alive and exist. they've lifted the personas and adpoted them onto some really incredible works of fiction... there are archetypes and characteristics and relationship dynamics that i see over and over and over again, always distinctly non-normative and queer, and god dammit it gets me ever time.

i'm struggling to come up with a third... i think The Batman (2021) Selina and Bruce. actually yes this one definitely. god i fucking love those two. my heart like actually ached when she left at the end.

First Ship Ever:

This is going back a long time but I wanna say it was Stucky or Destiel that really had me first. which honestly i was right about that, those white guys have chemistry! i used to eat up post-winter soldier fics all the time and i always end up coming back to them. something about bucky on the run or holed up and scared as his memories struggle to come back, and then steve being the first person to be gentle with him. anyway

Last Song:

my god let me tell you. i listened to ethel cain for the first time today (Golden Age) and i immediately started like crying in the car and then i wrote more poetry than i have in maybe months? that was hours ago and i'm still neck deep in her discography =D

Last Movie:

Avatar: the way of water!!! Avatar is basically a new special interest for me and I'm learning sooo much about it. also this movie is Worth going to the fancy theater for.

Currently Reading:

Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins. i think this is the first time I'm rereading the hunger games, and I'm so glad i picked it up over christmastime bc 1) i got sucked into it and finished it in like a day and a half; and 2) what an incredible fictional depiction of revolution. like katniss' character arc, the emphasis on solidarity and community over and over and over again, every detail adds so much.

Vine Deloria Jr.'s The World We Used to Live In, which is packed with American Indian stories on spirituality and medicine men. i only just started it but i'm clinging onto his words like they're air. which, in the busted concrete version of the world now, they might as well be.

Currently Watching:

Dimension 20's Neverafter, which is premiering weekly rn (too slow! agonizing!!) and is just beginning, but already getting really fucking good. I keep my copy of Grimms' fairy tales in the bathroom now lol and the stories are crazy. The boy who could not fear had me at the edge of my toilet fr!!

Currently Consuming:

i mean where's the post that's like "autism costs families $60,000 a year" "all that weed im smoking"

Currently Craving:

my boyfriend come back :( when you're here you always put my head back on my shoulders the right way but it gets all messed up every time you leave

i dont think i have anyone to tag but mayve i'll edit & update with a tag later!

[stay-outta-my-blood-circle]

Finished BTD2. Thoughts. You know the drill (no pun intended). This one was tough!!

BTD1 ver \ TPOF ver

Cain

I didn't think he was all that interesting when I first saw him.

The fact that he is apparently my favorite was not known to me until the creation of this list, just now.

But maybe that's not such a surprise because he's actually got a lot in common with Rire (despite being a fallen angel rather than a demon).

Like Rire, he seems to enjoy the finer things, he's jaded, and more importantly: you have to keep his interest, and he gets bored easily.

Unlike Rire, he's pretty serious by nature (therefore more difficult to entertain and less inclined to put up with 'misbehavior'), practically forlorn even.

Also unlike Rire, though, I think he's more able/likely to become truly fond of someone. He's downright soft once you win him over.

Wings pretty. Hair nice.

I'm also a sucker for the whole 'call me anytime you need help, I'll swoop in and defend you' kind of thing 🥰

First ending: "Cain dropped you"

Favorite ending: either "Cain saved you" or "Cain saw your value"

8.5/10 I'll take him

Lawrence

Baby boy. Baby.

So sweet and anxious. Doesn't want to hurt you but does want to remove your spine and keep it. Loves you so much he wants to (literally) climb inside your ribcage but also can't believe anyone could truly love him back 🥺

someone get this man a psychiatrist

The little sad smiles, the mutters, the blushes. I could just eat him up fr

First ending: "he took you to the woods"

Favorite ending: "Lawrence got closer" or "Lawrence kept you"

*gently holds* 8/10

Damien

Gets a special mention despite not technically having his own route because I love him, your honor

I do have a weakness for grumps so this is not shocking

Another fallen angel, related to Cain. An all around good boy despite being kinda cranky. Also a priest if that does anything for you.

You get a nice epilogue with him if you let him rescue you!!

7.5/10, glad the boyfriend he apparently has doesn't keep him from fooling around with me 😏

Vincent

Went back and forth on him a lot throughout his route

Me when he first appeared on screen: 😳 awooooga!!

Highest percentage of death endings, I think. Yikes. He's easy to piss off.

Big stronk. muscles. scars

I like his personality too. Playful, flirty, and generally easygoing as long as he's not angry.

Protective, loyal, and affectionate (once you win him over), and probably a lot of other traits one could ascribe to a pet dog because.... werewolf

Some of his endings actually gave me feels. He can be very sweet.

Lets you wear!! His clothes!! Because they look good on you and also yours smell good so he wants to keep them! 😖

Some uh. rough kinks 😬 just ignore those I guess

The best ending you can get with him is also poly, which is very cool, because he already kinda has a bf

BUT

I actually kinda dislike the bf so 😒 he's a brat and not in a fun way

First ending: "Vincent stepped in"

Favorite ending: "Vincent saved you"

*scritches ears* 7.5/10 (yeah he's tied with Damien, whatever. I can't choose)

Ren

I realize I picked a very cute CG but..... this little shit

Once again I'm going to piss off the fandom, because he's another major fan favorite

but he really is kind of a little shit. Also I'm sorry, he looks like he's 13 years old and the thirst train just cannot leave the station with him looking like that

I do sympathize with him and he certainly can be adorable. I'm perfectly happy to be kind to him when he's not zapping the ever-loving shit out of me 😠

I can't forgive him for what he did to my baby boy though!! Ever!!!! I hated playing that scene over and over jfc 😭

(also let me just say...... seeing that body he has in the freezer was so cathartic, I very nearly pointed and laughed)

First ending: "you took Law's place" (of course)

Favorite ending: "you helped Ren"

6/10 I do feel the urge to hug him when he cries

[shepherds-of-haven]

I hope you’re having a great day Lena! I was just wondering if we could have any fluff facts about the shepherds as a whole! Like fun tidbits of how they interact with each other, what some of them do if they have the same day off, does anyone host weekly game nights?? I hope that makes sense! Reading the recent short story on Patreon I love seeing how the characters interact with one another and now I need moreeeeeee🙏

Ooh, great question! I’m feeling curiously tapped dry at the moment, so I’ll probably have to reblog this as more ideas come to me; I’m so happy you’re enjoying the short story, btw!! 💖

Some group dynamic headcanons:

Many of them steal clothes from each other. Briony wears a cute sweater of Shery's (she asked), Ayla gets cold so she just takes one of Red's jackets from a chair (she didn't ask), Chase gives Tallys his scarf one day and Riel corders Trouble a pair of gloves from a fashion line he favors because his old ones are holey and they get into an argument about it... This leads to some recruits mistakenly thinking that the captains are all involved in some sort of mass relationship because they keep walking out of each other's rooms wearing each other's clothes. (The recruits believe a lot of really dumb stuff, if you couldn't tell. They LOVE gossip. It's like a competitive sport in the compound)

There is a weekly card game night, initiated and organized first by Chase, but it grows bigger over time, with snacks, cakes, drinks, and new games being procured! I'd actually say it's more like every ten-fourteen days or so than on any set weekday, and is typically proposed by anyone who senses that they or others need to blow off some steam. They all tend to meet in a private common room and either just chill and play some card games and casually drink and listen to music, or they get LOUD and raucous and play more risque non-card games (like Question or Command/Truth or Dare). The loud nights are more like once a month or bi-monthly, though! They take place in the captains' lounge so dumb recruits don't get to join! It's rare that they're in there all doing the same thing, though: maybe half will be at the table playing card games while others will be broken up into smaller groups, say arm-wrestling in the corner or playing chess at the smaller table or reading, but they're all there! Game nights are almost never held unless everyone is there, which is extraordinarily difficult to schedule, but they all make an effort to make it happen--even those who first had to be dragged into it, like Blade or Riel!

Speaking of chess games, Red and Riel have a standing game where they complete at least four more moves every night that they're around and able to meet up after dinner. Planning their next move helps them both break up the monotony of the day, and it's something they enjoy immensely. However, whenever he gets called away on a mission, Red gets sick with worry that Riel's been cooking up all sorts of schemes while he's been gone, so sometimes on the road he has, like, a schematic that he doodles on trying to anticipate Riel's next move, and it's very nerdy and ramps up in joking Anxiety. Riel, graciously, goes easier on him on nights after he comes back from long trips, though he denies it

Similarly, Blade and Trouble have a standing training session once a week where they just beat the crap out of each other. This is generally where they do the majority of their talking

Briony and Ayla first had an agreement that they would get the other one up if they overslept (Briony tends to be the one who oversleeps while Ayla is better about being up at dawn, but Ayla is really grouchy if she went to bed late and Briony is the only one who can handle her), which morphed into doing runs and sparring together at dawn and having breakfast frequently!

The girls have a standing spa night once a month where they all get together in a room (usually Shery’s) and basically do sleepover stuff and relax and chat and catch up for a few hours. This also sometimes involves showing each other new outfits that they bought that month! Sometimes there are even group baths in the big common bath, but these are rarer because Shery is shy and Tallys doesn’t like sitting in hot water getting pruny

Chase and Trouble drag Red and Halek to go drinking with them around once a month; sometimes Blade is persuaded to go if Trouble can get the drop on him and punch him hard enough to wind him. It’s complicated

Riel and Shery, of course, have tea together once a week! You’re not allowed if you can’t bring a chill vibe (Riel’s rules). Tallys, Lavinet, Halek, and Red are occasional visitors; Briony is allowed on a good day. Blade would be allowed but he has 0 interest

Similarly, Lavinet hosts a weekly brunch, either in a courtyard or at some restaurant in town! Typically it’s a girl thing and Ayla, Briony, and Shery are the most consistent attendees, but Chase has snuck his way in there often, and Riel, Halek, or Red pop up occasionally!

Tallys and Halek cook together! It’s not all that often and doesn’t seem to have any set way of materializing--it just happens somehow--but they both very much enjoy it! Sometimes they cook dinner for the whole group and have a little dinner party that they both secretly get excited for! Sometimes Shery bakes the dessert!

Riel noticed that Tallys has a little garden that she spends time weeding, so he sends gardening tools or special seeds when he thinks she needs them and she leaves baskets of vegetables or vases of flowers in his office. All of this is done without exchanging a word

Chase sporadically teaches Briony acrobatics and things like tightrope walking, just randomly whenever they’re both idle. She teaches him how to gut people with bare fists and also sometimes they paint! 

Caine caught Red grazing in the pantry late one night and now it’s like a Thing where they pass each other in the kitchen and Red sort of just looks the other way re: Caine’s bedtime and what on earth he’s doing up so late and Caine doesn’t tell anybody that Red is just absent-mindedly eating a loaf of bread at 2 AM because he was too busy working to remember to eat dinner. It’ll be like, “there’s some turkey leftover from dinner in the cold box” “oh hey, Caine. thanks. ...so, what’s the news from the midnight watch tonight?” “i’m going to go hunt ghosts on the seventh floor with my friends!” “...okay! have fun!”

Lavinet has a monthly shopping trip where she updates her wardrobe, and it is very common for others to accompany her around the city and just shop while they drop! Common partners are Shery, Briony, Riel, Chase, and once memorably Blade, who didn’t know what he was in for!

Trouble and Ayla are wildly competitive and keep arm-wrestling each other for money; this becomes a bi-weekly sporting event that is eagerly attended and bet upon by third parties

There was ONE group karaoke night. ONE. Most of them got so blackout drunk that they swore to never do it again. Even now, several of them go green whenever they hear a popular bar song (“Don’t Piss Where You Plant Your Flowers”) being sung, especially badly

The game of "telephone" gets really bad in their group. It's like, Shery will say to Briony that she's worried because she thought Riel looked a bit peaky and feverish. Briony will say in passing to Trouble that Riel is getting sick and Shery is worried. Trouble will say to Tallys that Shery is worried sick because Riel is bedridden. Tallys will be mixing herbs and Chase will ask what for and Tallys will reply that Riel is sick, but because she's mixing herbs, Chase will surmise that the sickness must be quite advanced, and will later say, "Damn, have you seen Riel? Seems like he's really sick." Red will interpret this as "I have seen Riel for myself and have determined that he's extremely ill." At least four people will bust into Riel's room, expecting him to be on the verge of death, despite the fact that they saw Riel that morning. Riel will be fine and very annoyed at the intrusion.

They rarely go out as a group to bars and establishments outside of the compound (too chaotic as well as risky, for one thing, and also, recruits don't need to see their superiors like hanging out of bushes and dancing on tabletops drunk out of their minds, and also, "Mages can't drink" (lol)), but when they do deem it a worthy occasion (Trouble's birthday, say), the girls are very punctual when getting ready, and the boys are almost always extremely late due to various shenanigans (Chase forgot that he put a booby trap on Red’s door, covering Red with flour, or a cat somehow slips into Trouble’s room and steals, like, a detonator or an important key, and they have to go chasing it across the city). This has led to the girls coming late on purpose in order to even out their arrival, but mysteriously, this has only led to even later start times, meaning they often don’t get started until like 10 or 11 PM when the most well-intentioned souls meant to be in bed by midnight... that never happens, either!

One such night once led to them ending up on a ridge in the Sun’s Embrace, like a mile outside of the city, in order to watch the sun rise together, because hiking in the dark while blasted out of their minds sounded like a really good idea. They all made it, and the dawn was spectacular, but the moment was ruined when Tallys said softly, “It’s the beginning of a beautiful new day--” punctuated by Trouble abruptly throwing up in a bush and Riel just flat-out passing out

[supernaturallyobsessedchic]

Dean Winchester One Shots

(*Some miniseries will be in here since they started out as one shots...)

Demon Drama - Dean’s pushing her away. She loves him, and wants him to know that. But the Mark of Cain makes things difficult. Can she get through to the older Winchester?

Junkie - Dean’s a demon, and the reader just wants to be the best hunter there is. Demon Dean knows the fix for that.

An Angel Learning - The reader wants Dean back. Michael knows it, and knows what both want. But, when Dark Kaia comes knocking and tries ending Michaels plans, the reader has something growing inside her, that follows her in a new life.

My Arms (Song Fic) - After a rough hunt, the reader sings a song to remind Team Free Will, that it will all be fine if they leave their worries and stress behind, relax now. Worry later.

Whisky Lullaby (Song Fic) - Dean’s lost his family. He turns to drink to end his pain. His heaven makes it all worth it.

Soulless - The reader has feelings for Dean, but doesn’t know how to tell him. But when he brings home a girl, it hurts the reader to the point she does something drastic. Can Dean fix his mistake?

Comfort - After a rough hunt, Dean seeks the comfort of his girlfriend the reader.

Death Sentence - A classic, Dean being pissed about the readers safety. The reader risking her life for the man she loves.

Goner - The reader has had feelings for Dean for a while. Feelings are realized in this story, after a day of pranking gone wrong when Sam pranks Dean into thinking the reader trashed his car. Or, did he have it planned all along?

Our Work Never Ends - Years in the future, turns out Dean had a daughter with Cassie, and the daughter of a victim once saved by Sam Winchester are out looking for them. The hunter’s life sucks them in when they discover the bunker, and a certain archangel released from the Empty causing chaos and mayhem. It’s up to the Winchester’s to save the world, once again.

Still Hurts - The reader is in Supernatural, but things are still moving on in her other world. Makes things more difficult for the reader.

Fur Babies - A special fic, one where the reader’s childhood dog passes away. Dean does the sweetest thing to help her feel better.

Save Him - Sam and Dean go on one last hunt. But just before the older Winchester can accept his fate, his little brother fights for him one last time.

Firsts - Dean and the reader try something on their date night.

More Dean - Dean is very active and shows his girl love in every way possible.

The Birthday Boy - The reader plans out a whole day just for Dean’s birthday.

It would have been your Birthday - It would have been Dean’s birthday, but Jack has a surprise up his sleeves.

What I’ve Done - A “sort of” a episode rewrite of Supernatural episode “Inherit the Earth.” (15x19), Chuck has control of the reader.

Not You - A witch hunt goes sideways when Dean is under a mind control spell. The reader tells Dean the importance of forgiving himself.

Better this Way - Dean pushed her away. Maybe it was for the best.

You’re Not a Monster -  Dean discovers something different with the reader and it changes their relationship. Is there anything worth saving after Dean learns the truth.

Crash Project - College!AU,  The Reader’s priorities are a little messed up, when Dean and the Reader are paired for a project, Dean picks up on changes in the readers appearance.

You Belong with Me -  Dean and the reader are heading back to the bunker from their hunt, just them. After some close calls, they’re a little shaken up. But a storm makes it impossible for Dean to keep going, so he has to pull over and wait for the storm to pass.

Sick and Empty -  The reader returns from her universe, feeling empty and dead inside. Dean does everything he can to bring her back to life.

Someone Needs a Hug -  Dean is having a bad day. And starts pushing the reader away. He learns how much a hug can help put him back together.

Anything for my Girl - The reader tries drinking, Dean may have gone over kill with the type of alcohol the reader tries. So, he takes care of her hangover the morning after.

Forevermore -  It’s Dean and the readers wedding day. And she can’t help but remember all of the days and moments Dean has won her over.

You Feel Safe -  After a trying hunt the reader comes home, exhausted and feeling less than. Dean helps takes her mind off of things.

Sharing is Caring -  Dean and the reader are on a hunt, and while on the long drive back Dean checks into a motel that only has one room left with one bed. And the reader learns that sharing isn’t all bad, especially when your walls have weakened and need to be held together by a pair of strong arms and glued back by true and encouraging words.

Turn -  A hunt goes sideways for the reader and she’s bitten by a rare alpha, not all alphas have this ability and she is turned into a wolf. She tries adjusting to being a wolf and a hunter with Dean Winchester, an alpha of his own pack.

Turn Part 2 -  Sam tells her what really happened to them. But reveals something else she was not prepared for.

You’re It -  Mecahnic!AU, Her life is falling apart around her. So she heads to her hometown to start fresh. But is she ready to take on what awaits her in Lawrence Kansas.

Love Hurts -  Dean had a rough hunt that brought up some old memories. But when the reader doesn’t give him the chance to explain things go from bad to worse for the couple. (requested)

He Obviously Cares - The reader just went through a break up, Dean, Cas and Sam try to lift her spirits up and remind her she deserves to be happy. Maybe she should find someone who obviously cares.

A Whole New World -   Everyone’s dynamic has changed. But a new threat looms over the Winchester’s and Jack wants to come up with an easy way to really ensure everyone is safe.

~

[disabledcas]

for #transnaturalweek day 3: family + day 6: euphoria

↳ a fic about dean finding comfort in himself and in his gender through his child

this is the dress jack is wearing later in the fic. tw for one single sentence implying suicidal ideation.

wordcount: 1.7k | read on ao3

Dean never thought he was gonna be a parent. When transitioning he never got rid of that part of himself for the reason that one day. Some day. But he’s a hunter, when would he have time to plan for it, go through with it and then raise a child?

He thought a lot about it, though. All those sleepless nights where he had hours to himself, just to think. The thought of having a child never bothered him, rather it pleased him somewhat. A little baby to call his own, to hold, to love, to cherish. But it was impossible, with the life he led.

He didn’t want to be a dad, anyway. A father. He didn’t want to be like John.

He shelved the thought of having a child for years. He lost Sam, he got him back. He went to hell, he came back. He started the apocalypse, he ended it. He lost Sam again, he got him back. He lost Cas, he got him back.

In purgatory something changed. He met Benny, and Benny had a little girl with him. A child. She was around five years old, according to Benny, and her name was Emma. Dean didn’t wanna think about how she ended up here, all he knew was that she lost her mother and Benny found her in purgatory. Almost every waking moment was spent on finding Cas, but the rest was spent on taking care of her. They had to work together, him and Benny, to keep her safe.

They found Cas. By a lake. Dean hugged him, complimented his peach fuzz, doing everything to appear casual. The truth was he would’ve gotten down on his knees begging for him to come with them if he had to. He didn’t, though.

He doesn’t know why he thought Cas wouldn’t like kids, maybe from how clueless and heartless he was in relation to Claire, but Emma was actually the one that finally softened Cas up. Dean’s never seen a smile like that on him. A special, reserved smile that’s mostly directed at kids.

Something clicked in him there, something he couldn’t describe. He didn’t dwell on it, he couldn’t afford to, but it was there. From that moment on it never left him.

They found the portal. He used the spell to capture Benny and Emma’s souls in his arm and released them outside. They lost Cas on the way. It was Dean’s fault, he didn’t hold on tight enough. Sam hit a dog, met a girl, left the girl. Dean said goodbye to Benny and Emma. He locked himself in the bathroom for an hour after, crying his eyes out. He didn’t know why it hurt so much, losing them. Cas came back and it hurt a little less.

He got the Mark of Cain and stopped feeling. Or did he feel too much? He got rid of it and in the process they released the darkness. He lost Cas again.

When Mary came back it changed everything. All energy went into explaining everything to her, he had to use words and explanations he didn’t want to in desperate attempts to make her understand. Days were spent crying and sobbing and hiding. She eventually accepted it. But Dean understood it was weird, not just going from having a little girl and a baby boy and coming back to two men but the fact that they were also men. They were older than she was. She had children older than herself.

He told her that he kept his middle name. Dean Mary Winchester. It helped. She smiled at him.

Cas died again. Dean didn’t wanna live. He was handed a baby and he thought, this isn’t how I wanted this to go. This isn’t how this was gonna happen.

One day when Jack was around two months old, he woke up at 3am crying. Dean was up before he even knew what he was doing. He picked him up and held him close to his chest, he was shirtless because he read somewhere that babies crave skin to skin contact. As he started walking around the room, he gently bounced him up and down and hushed him softly. He was tired, sleep-deprived and he wasn’t thinking of what he was saying. Which is probably exactly why he ended up saying,

“Shh, baby. Momma’s here, it’s okay.”

He froze when he realised what he’d just said. Where had that come from? And why did it fit? He worried Jack was gonna tell it didn’t match up but then, as if by some miracle, it worked. Jack started calming down.

Jack was 4 months old when Cas came back. Dean was unsure when he handed him over to Cas, but he remembered Emma from all those years ago and calmed down. He had no reason to worry either because Jack immediately settled in Cas’ arms. Jack and Cas made eye contact and Dean frowned, Jack’s never been able to hold his gaze that long before. After a few minutes Dean realised.

“Are you guys talking to each other?” he asked.

Cas looked up and his eyes glimmered in the light.

“He missed me.”

Dean’s mind started spinning. Jack was only a baby, how is he talking already?

“He said that to you?!”

Cas chuckled and one tear fell over and ran down his cheek.

“No,” he shook his head, “He just sent a… a feeling.”

Jack gurgled and both their gazes fell down to him. Dean reached down and wiped some of the spit away from his mouth.

It took until Cas overheard Dean talking to Jack one night for Dean to tell him about what he is to Jack. He was scared, unnecessarily so. Cas was fine with it, Dean didn’t know why he thought he wouldn’t be.

He kissed Cas there. In relief, in confusion, in love.

The first time Jack said his name they were in the kitchen. It was a regular Tuesday afternoon and Dean was fixing him lunch. Jack was stretching his arms as far as they could go from where he was strapped down in his chair. He was making little grabby hands for the juice box in Dean’s hand.

“Momma,” he said.

Dean whipped around quickly, eyes widening as he stared at Jack. Cas came walking into the kitchen and paused when he saw Dean. He asked him what was wrong but when Jack repeated himself Cas, too, stood frozen. He snapped out of it quicker, though, and walked over to Jack. He crouched down next to his stool and asked him to repeat himself but Jack clamped up, suddenly shy. He pointed at the juice box in Dean’s hand. Dean wordlessly handed it to Cas.

As Jack grew Dean saw more and more of Cas in him. In both appearance and behaviour. The only thing that stuck out was his sandy blonde hair. Cas said he took after him in that department. Dean argued that he wasn’t that blonde.

People around them thought Jack was theirs. They met an old friend once who knew Dean was trans and he connected the dots. The wrong dots but Dean didn’t correct him. He realised it might be unfair to Kelly, and he wasn’t gonna let Jack ever forget about his mother, but it felt nice. The idea of Jack being his. Cas didn’t say anything either.

Jack fell the first time he tried walking without holding onto anything. He took two steps towards Dean and then fell straight on his face and started crying. Something about it felt familiar to Dean but he didn’t have time to think about it. He needed to comfort his son.

Cas read to him every night. Books he picked up from the closest library every Thursday. Sometimes he took Jack with him, those times he walked to the children’s section and let Jack point out which books to check out. The times Dean went with them he mostly stood in the background, holding onto the stroller as he watched them. The two loves of his life together. Sometimes the sight of them made him breathless.

Jack just turned four. They moved to a house not long ago because Sam and Eileen had started a headquarters in the bunker. They had no business raising a kid there. Chuck was gone. There’s still monsters out there, but life isn’t black and white anymore. There was no need to hunt all of them. And for the ones that needed to be hunted there were others that could do it. Dean wasn’t needed there anymore.

They had a party for him. Sam and Eileen came. Jody, Donna, Claire, Kaia, Alex, Patience. They all showed up. Some of the neighbours came as well. Jack wore his favourite outfit. A knee-length purple dress with white leggings underneath. There was a flower pattern on it and a bow at the collar. He wears it whenever he’s allowed to.

They were in their backyard. There were bunting flags and banners and balloons. It was a wild age Jack was in. And living in a normal suburb with an unpredictable nephil was hard. They’re running out of excuses for all the slip-ups he’s made.

But right now he was happy. He was laughing loudly around family and friends. There were traces of cake around his mouth that Cas was trying to wipe off. In an hour he was gonna be passed out on the couch from exhaustion and Dean will be left to clean up the yard. But he was happy, and that’s all that matters.

Sam walked up to him, leaning against the house. He was smiling and Dean smiled back.

“The kid is doing good but how’s the mother doing?” he asked teasingly.

Dean laughed. He looked over at Jack. He was finally letting Cas clean him up. There was wrapping paper scattered all over the lawn and toys that’s gonna be hard to take away from him later. Claire walked up behind Jack and put a tiara on his head. Dean took a sip of his juice.

“I’m good, Sam,” he replied, “I’m really good.”

So yeah, maybe their lives weren’t normal, maybe living around humans when the majority of your family is not was a bad idea, maybe this isn’t how he pictured it to go. But also, maybe, normal is overrated.

@transnaturalweek

[verobatto]

Unrequited Destiel...

The Legend of The Sun and The Moon

I just wanted to explain in a few words to those that are asking why Dean didn't reply to Cas or why is Jensen talking about angelical way to feel things.

I know they're a lot of post saying WE TOLD YOU THIS AND THAT, and is true. Because if you read my Destiel Chronicles from the beginning, you will see I ALWAYS CALLED THE UNREQUITED LOVE FROM CAS AND DEAN'S POV.

Some of you disbelieves this idea, but is the only way to intepretate why Destiel is the slowest slow burn ever.

No more intro, let's suffer together...

Season 4 and 5 JUST A FLIRTING GAME

Once Dean was pulled out from Hell, Castiel wanted to talk with him. He didn't wait a second. Things blew and it was messy, and even Bobby was scared that that thing would hurt his idjit. But it was just Cas, trying to speak with Dean, desperately trying to reach him in his true form. Why? Because he wanted to talk with him. He had to explain Dean's mission but also, he felt fascinated. And even more after their first meeting face to face when he was finally able to find a vessel.

And Dean just it took him just a little of his time to feel the same fascination. The almighty angel, that could see right through his soul.

But also the angel that said things like...

And we have the handprint too, such an intimate sign between these two.

Castiel showing him, honestly showing him with words and actions, his special interest on him:

"My superiors begun to question my sympathies. I was getting too close to the humans in my charge. You."

How would Dean take this here? The poor guy just decided to check out the angel, and speechless as he was at that moment, couldn't reply to it. "Is he flirting with me? Does he know how gay this sounds?"

Then Cas rebel against Heaven for Dean. Dean pushed him, the whole he pushed Cas to help him. If you rewatch season 4 Dean is constantly asking Cas to help him. Because he already know Cas was different. Because he felt Cas was his friend, his ally, and something else it was growing up in his chest.

While Cas pushed him against the wall, cut his forearm and drew the sigil, Dean's face is full of awe. He can't believe this soldier powerful angel is doing this for him.

And then... "We're making it up as we go."

Gif credit @cyxnrose

The beginning of season 5 is a very busy Cas searching for God, but also, the flirtation begins. Dean is like a cute boy flirting with his crush. The second meaning jokes, trying to figure out if Cas catch it is hilarious. But he will understand 'Cas doesn't understand that reference.'

From Dean's POV in these two season, we coul under he thinks angels are junk less.

Season 6: The profound Bond and the Longing

The romantic feeling from both sides began to flow even more when Castiel goes into the black side, and the first Destiel break up appears infron of our eyes in the middle of a very romantic scenes.

Gif credit @starlightcastiel

Gif credit @inacatastrophicmind

The last gif is out of discussion, bot men looking at each other with sad eyes, longing and as if their conversation isn't over. Dean being disappointed at Cas and Cas trying to make him see his point. Everything he does, he does it for Dean.

And now we know why it is.

Season 7: Mourning Dean and the Jealousy

Even with Showrunner Sera Gamble trying to focus Dean's morning into a Wincest subtext, we had put king Ben Edlund came to the rescue in episode 7x09.

Putting things in order, we were faced with Dean's source of depression: Castiel's death.

So, after that, when Cas really comes back, the reunion is another romantic movie. The MEMORY LOST trope.

And then... Castiel's pseudo wife...

The trope is getting better with the spicy Jealousy in Dean's eyes.

Gif credit @impalaofgrace

So he can't completely enjoy Cas is back because:

1) He doesn't remember him: so, how can be mad or anything else if Cas doesn't remember any details of their break up?

2)The guy has a wife! Okay, so, he has a wife, he easily got a wife from... Nowhere?

And then Meg comes and he is Jealous all over again!

Dean is a really mess of feelings, but in the end, when Cas recalls everything, and when I say everything, i mean Dean, because the majority of his memories was him, Dean just pulls out from his car Castiel's bloody trenchcoat and gives it him back!

So, if there was any doubts about why was Dean mourning and depressed for, we have the confirmation!

Then, let's turn the page, because now is Cas the mess... Depressed and suffering, because he almost destroy heaven, but, do you know what cares the most to Cas and when he cheers up? Yes...

When Dean says... "I RATHER JAVE YOU, CURSED OR NOT" Castiel immediately changed his face, he smiles, and kept staring at Dean with heart eyes. He was happy because Dean was forgiving him. Because since he recovered his memories, the biggest cause of it was Dean's rejection. Dean not being able to forgive him. That was the main cause of his sadness. That's why he avoided reality, he didn't have a cause, because his cause was Dean and Dean was mad at him. But now? Cas is happy again. That's why he decides to come back to battle. "I'll go with you."

Season 8 Purgatory of love and Pining!Dean

Okay, is in this season, Carver era, when Dean's POV has a turning point about Castiel and his true feelings for him and is in this season, when Dean starts pining strongly for the angel, and feeling his love is unrequited.

The cause of it, is Purgatory. The Purity about Purgatory resided in the capacity of that place to resides in abolish every human necessity to let the mind to focused in what really matters. In this case for Dean was SURVIVE AND CAS.

So we can say that what remained pure in Dean's heart was TO FIND CASTIEL.

That's why he prayed to him every night, and that's why in the moment Cas CONFESS he ran away to protect him, something in Dean changes forever.

Gif credit @agusvedder

If you pay attention to Dean's face reaction here, is the expression of the man that realizes in that precisely moment his feelings for Castiel. Even Cas stares to a side, because there was Benny watching them, and the thing he was about to say it was too intimate. I did it to protect you.

Dean, the Big Protector, is being protected by Castiel. So, in Purgatory, Dean Winchester find out his not platonic love for his best friend.

Then we had the entire season with pining!Dean and deception.

Dean's mind invented one excuse for Castiel running away from him because thinking his best friend abbandoned him, was just too painful. He does this again when Cas pushed him inside the gate and he stays in Purgatory. Dean just rewrote in his mind the whole sequence. Imagining that Cas was defeated. But the reality was, Castiel wanted to stay. And when Cas reveals this truth to the hunter, Dean's face is a mix of deep sadness and deception. He felt really rejected by his friend. He felt his unrequited romantic love for him. But he will feel it more stronger in the crypt scene, with the brainwashing and how Castiel's love for Dean broke th connection. But he left. That was a real rejection the hunter barely could handled.

Season 9: Pinning!Castiel and Human!Cas

When Cas became Human, he has to face all the intensity of human's feelings. In this season, is time for our angel to realize his romantic love for the hunter.

Castiel will mirroring Dean's pining in season 8, and he will also feel rejected by him.

Just like Dean in season 8, Castiel will feel his romantic love is unrequited, after Dean kicked him out from the bunker, being this the parallel to the crypt scene.

But then Cain's mark comes, and everything gets worst.

Season 10: Castiel is Dean's Colette

The whole Cain's mark was the visual sign of the Destiel handprint (profound bond) attempt of break.

With Cain and Dean going through a perfect parallelism in which Crowley was placed in the friend's spot, Sam in the brother's spot and Castiel in Colette's spot. Blatant and canon exposure of what Cas means for Dean.

But now, is time for Dean, after came back for being a demon, to feel unrequited again. And this is a detail that could be not seen, but it caught my attention.

CASTIEL: At least temporarily. It’s a long story. Crowley, stolen grace. There’s a female outside in the car.

This is what Castiel says when he goes into Dean's room and after Dean praises him...

Gif credit @inacatastrophicmind

Dean had been with Crowley when he was a demon this whole time, so Cas was heartbroken. Even this season opens with a very depressed Castiel in the bed just let himself die because Dean was gone. So, that's why Cas says this.

So you went with Crowley, i have a female in my car. See? I don't need you.

He was Jealous, and now Dean gets Jealous, but he also gets the sensation again of his love for Castiel is unrequited.

The episode that followed this one, Dean goes into a blind date with random chick he took from a date app (very ooc, but he did it because he had his heart broken and because he thought CAS had cheated on him while he was gone as a demon.)

Season 11: Dean resist a forced bond with Amara because he's bonded with Castiel

Season 11 is a blatant exposure of Dean's feelings for Castiel. There a lot of hints throughout the season telling us Dean is in love, just like in season 9 there was hints of this with Castiel. (Again, mirroring each other).

Dean resisted Amara because of his love for Castiel. But Cas is oblivious about this.

When Castiel is possesed by Lucifer, Dean switch's into desperate mode. If he was worried about his attraction for Amara, now the only thing he cares was Castiel, exposing again WHO DEAN IS IN LOVE WITH.

But when Dean wanted to rescue Castiel, and Cas didn't want to come back to him, it hurt him worst. Again, just like in season 8, Dean can't handle Cas doesn't want to come back with him (first from Purgatory and now from being possesed). Again Dean feels rejected and unrequited. That's why when Cas is back and the end of the world is close... Dean says these words...

"You're our brother, Cas. I want you to know that."

And Cas' face...

Gif credit @mad-as-a-box-of-frogs

That's a man with the heart broken, mostly because we know now he was in love with Dean CANON FACT! (sobbing louder).

Season 12 and the confusing I LOVE YOU

This season was full of married couple situations, but mostly, we had Castiel's I Love You in the barn, before "dying".

At first Dean thinks the angel was saying this as goodbye, expressing into words his feelings for the Winchesters. Because as and angel, maybe Cas was feeling he has to protect them all. But then he says this singular I Love You to Dean, and the guy doesn't know how to take it. It was a platonic ILY? A non platonic ILY? Does angels feel the same like us? Does he sees me as a brother? Dean was truly a mess, so he decides to respond to that with a Mixtape.

But, when Castiel disappears for days, he sinks again into that sensation of unrequited romantic love.

Then Cas comes back, and then he goes away again, and then he dies.

Season 13: The reunion and the meaning of Castiel coming back

Dean's mourning for Cas can't be interpreted otherwise than LOSING THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE.

And the longing for his angel plus some Nougat powers, brought him back.

The thing is, Dean didn't expr as his feeling for Castiel and when the angel asked him that he needed to believed that he came back for a reason, Dean goes...

Gif credit @inacatastrophicmind

This sound like if he was recruiting Cas for war. And Cas' took it as that. So he came back to soldier angel mode. Because, okay, if Dean and Sam needed him to fight, he will fight.

Unrequited Love again.

Season 14 Healing Dean and the prelude of the break up

Post-possesed Dean is a follow up of self knowledge and self growing. He was healing the whole season.

But in episode 14x04 we heard Dean being Jealous or hurt because Castiel didn't go to rescue him and then because he goes into hunts with Jack. Unrequited love again.

Did Cas miss me as I missed him?

Is the first time Dean will actually name the word LOVE talking with the kid.

And then Mary dies and everything is a mess.

Dean yells YOU ARE DEAD TO ME, and how sad that sounds now that the angel had died again. Saving his life.

Dark clouda over our ship...

Season 15: And Maybe is not too late...

In season 15 we lived the angst of the Destiel break up, but then their reunion in Purgatory was beautiful.

Again, facing the fact that he could lost Cas one more time, Dean went down on his knees and prayed to him, and because he was in Purgatory, his heart and mind were released from any distraction, and he was plenty focused in the love he feels for his angel.

He cried, and begged for him to come back.

And he found him, following his heart, the profound bond he has with Castiel.

But, when he was about to say something that he hadn't said in the prayer, Castiel cut him off. So... Again the hunter had to swallow his words and the unrequited love punch him again.

Then... Castiel's romantic love confession took Dean by surprise, because, now that you read all the clues i gave you and i convinced you that Dean and Cas thought their love were unrequited, you will understand Dean's reaction.

Gif credit @spnsmile

Dean didn't can't believe Cas had loved him the way he does this whole time and now, he will lose him again. Is too much pain he can't handle.

For a lot of reasons we had analyzed so many times (Dean's arc has to have a closure expressing his ILY to the angel, the Empty plot is not ended, Etc) Is logical to think Cas will come back in the last episode, and this slow burn story will end with them being together, finally.

To Conclude:

The legend of the Sun and the Moon talks about two lovers that can't be reunited but they love each other deeply.

Is accurate with Destiel, because these two men had always being pining for each other but never be able to be together as they wish.

Castiel always thinking Dean doesn't reciprocate his romantic feeling for him and Dean thinking because Cas is an angel, he doesn't love him back romantically.

The Sacred Oath always playing in Castiel's POV as an impediment too and Dean's love clocked in shame too.

The deal with the Empty had been settled as we suspected in season 14, as a romantic plot. So, it has to have a closure.

These thoughts are based on the volumes from my assay "The Destiel Chronicles", currently in it's 87th volume.

See you soon! Have faith!

Destiel Is Forever!

Tagging @gneisscastiel @emblue-sparks @magnificent-winged-beast @weird-dorky-little-d @michyribeiro @maleansu @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @dea-stiel @mybonsai1976 @anarchiana @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @mishtho @dancingtuesdaymorning @feathered-cas @bre95611 @zoerayne2426 @justmeand-myinsight @that-one-fandom-chick @proccastinate @studio-hatter @pepevons @poorreputation @mrsaquaman187 @dizzypinwheel @jawnlockwinchester @dwstiel @ladygon @shippsblog @la-random-fangirl @lets-try-this-again-please @mychemicalobsession514 @destiel-shipper-11

@asphodelesauvage @2musiclover2

Buenos Aires November 17th 2020 8:33 PM

[casmybelovedass]

I'm much calmer now, but I'm still salty about this and I won't stop talking about it.

So, Sam was supposed to be the main character.

And?

Stories change. This story in particular changed many times over the course of 15 years.

It was about the brothers, yes? Both of them.

But Sam was the one with the curse, the special one, the rebel, the smart one, the one with powers, the favourite.

The Luke Skywalker. The protagonist.

Dean? Oh, he was the goofy slugger, always looking for food or women to stuff his face with. The school drop-out. Always getting in trouble.

The Han Solo. The sidekick.

(Now fucking tell me who actually prefers Luke to Han Solo fucking tell-) (also he's actually Leia but-)

So... what happened?

Jensen Ross Ackles happened.

Jensen took Dean's character skeleton and built him into one of the most complex and interesting characters to ever exist.

And the writers saw that. So what did they do?

They made Dean (if intentionally is unknown) woman&queer coded, in hopes of making him look weaker, less worthy of attention, secondary.

But that's not who Dean is:

- He's a caretaker, soft, a protector.

- He desires to be loved more than anything else in the world. He's tough, and yet, submissive. (half the time, Dean's hookups are to show he's cool and gets around easily, the other half is to show his desperate need for closure)

- Stays put and silent because that is what was taught to him since childhood. Relatable.

- He's insecure. Sensitive. Good with children.

- Doesn't allow himself happiness. Always puts others before him.

- He's repressed. Self conscious. He gets objectified, mostly acknowledged for his looks.

- He acts dumb because, sometimes, it's better to be underestimated than targeted as a threat.

- He never feels "man enough", and is reminded constantly, obv mostly by j*hn, but also by society, because men shouldn't like what he likes:

Cooking

Dressing up

The idea of having a family

Chick flicks

Panties

Musicals, pop and romantic music

Being bossed around/manhandled

Men

But, fuck you, writers. All these traits? Only made him EVEN MORE interesting.

(Guess the fuck what! Cis het men don't even make a QUARTER of the fandom!!!)

People all around the world saw themselves in this beautifully flawed human, and found comfort in him.

Realizing you can be sensitive, insecure, even weak, and still be brave, strong, the hero.

Do you realise how many FTM found themselves in Dean?

Now, I love Sam, but really, his character didn't go as far as Dean's, because they simply placed him on a pedestal reading "protagonist" on it.

Yes, they gave him the powers/Lucifer/souless storylines, PTSD and a curse that kills off every woman he sleeps with, and I'm definitely making a post about Sam alone because yes.

But apart from this? They didn't give us much.

He had SO MUCH potential for more. And I'm sorry he couldn't have as much an exploration as Dean (or Cas).

Speaking of which. Castiel.

My God.

He is the definition of character development (both good and bad).

A character so fresh, so new to the world, LITERALLY, so interesting!

A character ment to stay only for 3 episodes, but had such an impact, he quickly became a fan favourite, and ended up staying until he end well...

The stone cold, mindless soldier, autism coded, "of God" angel, clearly so different from his brothers... rebelling against his own kind, experiencing humanity, emotions, choosing free will, believing in two little humans more than anything else in the universe, and helplessly falling in love with one.

An angel, learning how to love, through a human.

An all powerful being who is awkward, nerdy, socially anxious, autism&queer coded.

And what did they do?

Stripped him of his powers, basically reduced him to a lamp [AAAAA] in a corner, tried killing him off MULTIPLE TIMES, threw a bomb in the makeup/hair trailer and slapped an orange filter on Misha to make him less appealing.

Well, excuuuuuse you if I like these ones better than "I was pre-lawboy"

They just had SO MUCH MORE to offer.

And, let's be honest here, apart from soulless, trials and hunter chief storyline, when has Sam been the focus after season 5?

They gave us a decade of married drama, slow burn, breakups, widower arcs, Casifer, Deanmon, human Cas, Michael!Dean, THEE Empty Deal™️, Purgatory, CAIN PARALLELS, A SON, and so on.

But please, do tell me again how doing a 360 and going bUT sAm WAs tHE OG mAIn chArACtEr wasn't just an audience thirst trap for w*lker

[legaciezzz]

Hello Sister

Part 1

Hope & Cain

Genre: Chapter fic

Synopsis: It was always believed that Hope was Klaus’s only heir and the tribrid, but things change when Cain strolls into town and claims his title as a Mikaelson. But just how much of a Mikaelson is he?

A/N: Here it is Finally! the first chapter! I know it took forever but I really hope you guys are not disappointed with this series!

Cain came to Mystic Falls to look for Hope, but instead found himself in a cell guarded by some guy named MG according to the bearded man. Not that he was upset about it, he seemed to be in the right place, judging from the way they reacted earlier they knew Hope Mikaelson.

Cain leaned himself against the metal bars and watched MG, a smug grin on his face.

MG looked anxiously back at him for the sixth time now, it was obvious that the staring was making him uncomfortable. Then Cain's attention shifted as heard voices nearing.

"I don't understand. If he's not another monster then who is he?" he heard a girl say through the walls.

"I don't know, he won't say anything other than he's looking for you." the man he met earlier replied.

"Dr. Saltzman, thank god," MG said as the bearded man walked in with three girls: two brunettes and a blonde. "He's really starting to creep me out."

"Thanks, MG. We can take it from here." the bearded man, Dr. Saltzman, told him and with that he didn't waste any time getting out of there.

Cain straightened up. "So which one's Hope?" he asked, looking at the girls.

The brunette with the blue eyes stepped out from the middle, arms crossed.

He looked her up and down, a slight arch to his brow. "Hm. Thought you would be taller."

"Who the hell are you and what do you want?" Hope said, unamused.

That question made him smile, which combined with the look in his eye was a little eerie. "The name's Cain. Mikaelson."

"Mikaelson?" the other brunette echoed softly. "I thought you didn't have any other family."

"I don't." Hope responded.

"Actually," Cain began, dangling his arms through the bars. "You do. Hello, Sister."

. . .

"That's impossible. I can't have a brother." Hope said aloud, pacing around.

They were now in Alaric's office, discussing what was just discovered in private. Being Hope's sibling was such a bold claim, plus there was something about Cain that seemed off and they were wary of whether or not they should trust him.

"Are you sure none of your family has mentioned anything about this?" Alaric asked from his desk.

"Yes."

"Maybe Klaus got somebody else pregnant." Josie suggested.

"I highly doubt it."

"Hope, relax, okay? We  can just do the lineage spell and then we'll know if he's telling the truth or not." Alaric said.

"Do we really need another tribrid?" Lizzie pointed out, she had been rolling her eyes and checking her nails during the whole conversation. "One Hope is already enough."

"Thanks." Hope said, unconvincingly.

All of a sudden, MG came barging in which grabbed everyone's attention. "Uh, Dr. Saltzman, we got a situation out here."

They all rushed and followed him outside where a bunch of students crowded around a corpse of a now former student, head severed and a small pool of blood. Shocked gasps, murmurs and a little fainting crying fueled the tension in the atmosphere.

"Guess we can check off vampire." Josie said softly, it was no coincidence that as soon as Cain arrived at the school someone ended up dead.

Then they saw Kaleb appear, "Mystery Dude's not there."

"Thank you." Alaric said to the two boys before turning back to everyone else. "Alright, everyone head inside," and as the students started to do as told, he started to look around. "Where's Dorian?"

And on cue, Dorian emerged from the herd of teenagers frantically making their way inside. "Ric, what's going on?"

"We need to find Cain." Alaric told him before deciding to correct himself when he saw the confusion on Dorian's face. "Long story, just make sure everyone's situated inside."

Dorian then noticed the body. "Is that--"

"Yeah, do you mind taking care of that too?"

"So what do we do now?" Josie asked.

"We," gesturing to him and Hope, "are going to look for Cain before someone else gets hurt. You and your sister stay here."

Alaric and Hope quickly set out to look for Cain god knows what he was up to. Even though they just met him and barely knew anything about him, a dead body was hard not to see as a red flag.

"Where do you think he went?" Alaric asked, walking alongside Hope.

"How am I supposed to know?" Hope replied, a bit bitter. All the sudden she apparently has a brother and she's automatically supposed to know all about him.

A minute passed and they didn't seem to find any sign of Cain, until he popped up out of nowhere. "There you are," he said walking towards them with a smile, blood dripping from his lips.

Hope looked like she was about to attack him with a spell, but Alaric lowered her hand. "What the hell?!" she said.

There was a moment of confusion on his face before realizing that they were probably talking about the body. "Right, yeah. Uh, you left. I got bored... And hungry, I guess-- it wasn't that hard to get out." Cain rolled his eyes when neither of them responded. "It could've been worse. Trust me, one person won't be missed."

"We don't feed off of people here." Alaric said.

"My bad. It won't happen again."

"Why were you looking for us?" Hope said.

"Well you walked out in the middle of our conversation. That was pretty rude."

"Well why don't we get back inside and we can finish that conversation." Alaric said which caused Hope's head to snap towards him.

"Are you serious? He just killed someone and you want to let him back in the school?"

"You think just letting him go is a better idea? We need to know more about him."

"You know I can hear you, right?"

Hope huffed. "Fine."

The three made it back inside to Alaric's office. Alaric and Cain sat at opposite sides of his desk, while Hope leaned against it, not bothering to hide her annoyance.

"So, headmaster, huh?" Cain said, casually looking around the room, trying  open with  a little  small  talk.

"What are you doing here?" Hope asked, cutting  straight to the chase.

"What? Small family reunion is not a good enough answer for you?"

"Yeah, actually."

"Is it really that hard to believe you may have a brother?" he asked, that smug look appearing on his face again.

"Why don't you just cut the bullshit and tell us why you're actually here."

Cain opened his mouth but Alaric stood up to intervene. "You know, maybe tomorrow's a better day to discuss this." he said, looking at Hope. It was obvious her hostile tone wasn't helping get answers. "Hope, why don't you take him back down."

Hope sighed before reluctantly walking Cain out. With each step he took, it got quieter, aside from a few whispers. He glanced around at everyone's face. They all seemed to be scared or angry, either way he didn't care. If this was after one body, just wait until they saw what he really was capable of.

They reached the cell and once he stepped foot in there, he heard the door close, lock and hope speak some Latin-- which made his head turn.

"Boundary spell." she said.

He nodded. "Hm."

She turned to leave without saying anything.

"What? No goodnight?" He asked playfully.

Hope flashed him an obviously fake smile, "goodnight," then rolled her eyes before officially leaving.

Once the silence settled in, Cain walked around in circles. Eventually he got bored and decided to lie down on the bed, staring at the ceiling before falling asleep.

The next morning Cain woke up. He sat up, back resting against the wall, and waited patiently. By the way the sun shone through the little opening. It was probably around mid morning, but it wasn't like he was awake for long either.

Soon enough, Hope entered the room and with a wave of her hand brought down the barrier. "Get up," she said, the blatant indifference in her tone.

The smugness returned to Cain as he walked to the bars. "What? Is there a morning drill or something?"

"Tests," she corrected. "All the new students have to go through them. So if you want to stay you're going to have to pass all of them. If you really are who you say, that shouldn't be a problem." That was a lie. Technically he only had to pass one, but she couldn't let him know that. "Give me your hand."

Cain put hand through the bars, slightly confused, before Hope grabbed it, taking a knife out from behind her back and running the blade across his palm. "The hell?"

She watched the wound close almost immediately. "Well test number one is complete."

"And what test was that?"

"Healing factor."

"I thought yesterday would have hinted at my abilities."

"Can't be too sure." she said with a passive aggressive smile that only lasted for a second. Keeping the knife in her hand, she opened the cell. "Let's go."

They exited the chambers and made their way to the school yard, passing by Alaric whom she gave the bloody knife.

The tests went into noon and Cain passed everyone of them with flying colours, adding the flair of cockiness which Hope rolled her eyes at. The rest of the student body steered clear of the testing field, especially when he hurled a log across campus.

"Was that really necessary?" she asked, turning back to him.

"Are we done now?"

"Not yet." She noticed he had redirected his attention to the twins who were walking in the distance and smiled at them. "Hey. Eyes over here."

"You really don't like me, do you?"

"Is it that obvious?"

"You know. I actually always wanted a sibling. I don't know about a twin but anything's better than being alone. I just think  you're  having  trouble  accepting  that you're not that special anymore." He clearly took pleasure in telling her that last segment. He then turned to walk away.

She put a hand out. "Where do you think you are going?"

"I'm hungry."

Hope walked to a cooler that Alaric traded her for the knife, and took out a blood bag. "Here." she said, tossing him it.

Cain examined the rich red fluid before actually drinking. He decided to take a seat on the cooler as he took his lunch break.

He handed her the bag to offer it to her, which she turned her nose up at. "I'm good."

He looked at her with a slight squint to his eyes, wrapping his lips around the straw like tube once again.

A moment later Landon appeared with a brown paper bag in his hand. "Hey. This is for you." He said, giving her a peck on her temple as she accepted the bag with a smile.

"Who's this?" Cain asked, almost immediately making her return to her previous demeanor.

"He's no--"

"Boyfriend." Landon said, puffing his chest in a way that failed to be subtle or intimating.

Cain grinned. "And what are you? I mean you have to be special to get into this place, right?."

"Phoenix." the boy said proudly.

"Okay, lunch is over. Go jump in the lake." Hope cut in, she obviously didn't want Cain getting close to anyone she cared about, especially since his motives were unclear.

Cain scoffed. "Really?"

"Yes." she said, quickly dismissing him with her hand.

He playfully rolled his eyes as he directed himself towards the lake, stripping down to his underwear when neared closer to the water.

Hope sent Landon off to get towels while she ate her bagged lunch and waited. Once Cain was finishing swimming and drying off, Hope noticed something on his shoulder blade, glistening from the remnants of the water. A birthmark.

As he finished drying off, Landon came back around. "The spell is done."

"Spell?" Cain echoed, putting his shirt back on. "What spell?"

Hope sighed before following Landon inside, Cain walking with her. "Lineage spell."

Cain paused for a second. "So if all you needed was a lineage spell then why all the other trouble?"

"We agreed that it was better to keep an eye on you by making you do all the tests since clearly just keeping locked up didn't go that well."

"Hm, smart. Actually, No, it was kind of obvious. You know, I easily could have slipped away."

“So why didn’t you?”

“I wanted to get to know my sister.” he said with a smile that made her eyes roll. "Hey, Boyfriend, is she always like this?" he asked Landon.

Landon turned to Cain then glanced at Hope who gave him an intense look. He hesitated, but when he opened his mouth he stammered until Cain chuckled.

They went back to Alaric's office where he, Dorian and Emma were. Dorian seemed the most guarded, he had his eyes locked on Cain and his jaw clenched.

"So what is it?" Hope said, sitting down with Cain.

"Well it was a little hard with the amount of blood, but we managed. He's telling the truth, he's your brother." Alaric said.

"That's what the knife was for? If you needed my blood, all you had to do was ask."

"Well excuse us for not trusting you," Dorian spat.

"But now that we know you're telling the truth," Alaric said, giving Dorian a stern glance, "hopefully we can establish some."

"You're just going to let him stay here just like that?" Hope asked, completely shocked by his decision.

"There are conditions though."

"Of course there is." Cain said, handling a book from Alaric's desk until he took it back.

"You're not to leave school grounds without permission, you'll attend class as scheduled, you'll be under close watch-- especially by Hope who will be in charge of you and you'll stay in the cell until we're sure you're no longer a danger to the student body. And if any-- and I mean if any-- harm is to come to any students, I deal with you myself. Am I clear?"

"Crystal," he said with a cheeky smile. "Who's she?" he then pointed to Emma.

"This is Emma. She's the school counselor."

"Thanks, but I'm already well adjusted."

"I meet with all the students." Emma stated.

"Well then I'd like to consider myself a guest."

"Dr. Saltzman, can we talk for a minute?" Hope said.

. . .

Cain was now in the library, Dorian watching him like a hawk, while Hope talked to Alaric about what the hell he was thinking. Cain was contently browsing through a book, legs up on the table. His focus, however, drifted as his ears picked up a conversation MG and the twins were having as they huddled near the library doors.

"Do you think Dad is gonna let him stay?" Josie said. "I mean they must have decided something."

"Hope hasn't told you guys anything?" MG asked.

"No, and by the looks of it she isn't too happy about this." Lizzie commented.

"They can't actually let him stay, right? I mean he killed one of the students."

"Like no one here has killed anyone." Cain interjected with head still down in the book, causing the three to go quiet. He then set the book down and got up to walk over to them. "I mean this place is filled with werewolves and vampires, I think it's highly hypocritical of you to judge me as though I'm the only one that has taken a life."

Despite his smile, there was a certain intensity to his eyes that made MG swallow hard.

"Were you eavesdropping?" Lizzie said boldly.

"It's kind of hard to ignore when people are talking about you." Cain turned to her, there was something about her attitude that stood out to him. "I'm Cain, but you know that already."

"Lizzie." she said, unimpressed.

"And the shy one?" he asked, looking at Josie who seemed to be avoiding eye contact.

"Josie." she said meekly.

"And it's MG, right?"

MG nervously nodded.

Hope walked into the library, obviously looking displeased, and they all looked at her.

"And I'm guessing that's my cue." Cain said. "It was nice meeting you."

As he followed Hope back to Alaric's office yet again, she flashed him a look. It was clear that she didn't trust him, especially around her friends.

"So, do I finally get to talk now? Or are you two going to keep having side conversations?" Cain smugly asked as he rested against the back of a chair.

"Why are you here?" Alaric bluntly asked.

"Well I won't bore you with the details, but basically I was raised by a cult that I thought was family, then found out that was a lie along with my entire life and that I have a sister."

"And how exactly did you know where to find Hope?"

"I asked around. I had no idea our family was so popular."

"What do you want  with me?" Hope asked.

"I already  told you. Is wanting to know  your family seriously that much of a crime?" he said, laughing with confusion.

"Forgive us, we've haven't been getting a lot of friendly visitors lately."

Cain sighed and stood up, dropping the smug expression. "Look, I know I didn't make the best impression yesterday, but I've spent my whole life thinking I was alone and now I'm not. Wouldn't you feel the same way?" He stared at her earnestly, waiting for a response.

She looked into his eyes and the longer she did, it got harder to say no without seeming completely heartless. She glanced over to Alaric before sighing and softening her tone. "Fine."

"Great," he said,  smiling  wide as he pulled his sister for  a tight side hug. "I promise you we are going  to have  so much fun together." he whispered  into  her ear, sending chills down  her spine.

. . . 

The next day, it was time to tour the school  and mingle with  the factions. Hope was unenthused to say  the least and only gave a brief explanation to all the rooms they came  across while Cain took a deep interest  in everything. As they came to the end  of  the tour, they crossed  paths  with  Emma who was letting  a student  out of her office.

"Hope," she smiled, pleased  to see her face. "I see you're  giving  tours now."

"Actually, we're  just  finishing  it."

"And I'm glad we ran into you when we did," Cain  jumped  in, "because  I've been  thinking  about  what  I said to you  and  I've changed my mind. I'd love to talk to you."

"I'm delighted to hear that. I don't have anything right now,  if you'd like to come in." Cain nodded and walked  inside, Hope followed  him but was  stopped at the  door.

"I know Dr. Saltzman told you  to stay with  him, but you know the rules. Plus it seems  to  me like you could use a break from him...Don't worry, I can handle him." 

Hope relaxed her shoulders. "okay," she breathed out, forcing  a small smile. 

"And don't  forget, you and  I are scheduled for  Thursday." Emma  closed the door  behind her and  went  to seat herself  across  from  the newcomer. "So, Cain, what would  you  like  to  talk about?" 

"You said that you meet with  all the students.  Do you  keep  files on them?"

She immediately  tensed  at the question, so caught  off  guard. "Those are strictly  confidential."

He leaned forward  and  smiled, looking  intensely into  the depths of her eyes.  "Surely you  can make an exception  for  family."

Compelled, Emma  rose up and  walked out  to her filing  cabinet. 

"And while you're at it, get her friends' too. I should know  what  kind  of company  my sister keeps."

She put a small  pile of files on the table  in the seating  area and  Cain kicked his feet  up as he started to browse them. He took time reading  the files, almost  analyzing them  like  characters  in a book. After he was done, he tossed  the  last file back  onto the  pile.

"My sister  has some  interesting  friends, doesn't  she?" he said, sitting  back up straight. "Oh-- and  I guess  I should  probably give you something  to write about  me in return. But, you know, I think  I'm pretty  well adjusted so there's nothing really  to talk about. I mean I was a true prodigy, I was amazing  at everything  I was taught, I was worshipped. It  wasn't  like  I had  a bad childhood, it's  just  that it was all a lie…" He started to  drift off and  zone out when it came to that last part but then quickly  snapped  out of  it. "Anyway, do with that what you will. This was a nice chat. I know this  was  only our  first time sitting  down  with  each other but I've  learned  so much  from  you."

They rose up together. "No problem," she said, putting  on a smile  to hide the underlying  uneasiness.

Right before walking  to the door, Cain  smiled back and  placed  a hand  on her shoulder. "Oh and just to be sure, no one needs to know about  this. You know, confidentiality and all." he said, using his compulsion again.

He was let  out and  wandered  the  halls  until saw Hope  again in the student lounge with  Landon  and Rafael. 

"There you are, and I see you're  with Boyfriend  and  Friend." he said, walking  over to them.

She looked over her shoulder and rolled her eyes.

"It's  Landon, actually." Landon said. 

"Good  to know," he said before  turning  his attention  to Hope, "So what else is on the agenda for today?"

"Meeting with  the  factions. And since you're here, Raf, I guess  we should  start  with  the  wolves."

"Sure."

The two said  their byes to Landon, Hope  giving him a kiss on the  cheek  before  leaving.

"So when he said  he was a phoenix  did mean it as in the bird or is that some code word I don't  know about?" 

"I'm not  talking about  my boyfriend with  you."

They spent the next few minutes in silence until they reached the gym where the pack were playing a small game of kickball.

"And here's the pack.” Rafael said, as the pack suddenly stopped the game and went to huddle around them. “Guys, this is Cain."

Jed, with his chest puffed out, took a step in. “Isn’t he the dude who killed Tristan Gorecki?”

“That was an accident.” Rafael said to which Cain in the background had his own reaction to the comment that made Hope shoot him a dirty look. ”And Dr. Saltzman said we have to give  him a chance to fit in.”

“How are we sure he’s not gonna hurt someone again?”

“Jed, do we really have to remind you of how  many fights you’ve been in?”

 Hope said, “he won’t hurt anyone. I’ll  make sure of it.”

Cain looked around at each of the werewolves. “So, who’s the alpha?”

“I am.” Jed and Rafael said in unison then looked at each other.

“I mean I did fight you to become Alpha.” Rafael said.

“Then you were a wolf for the summer and someone had to take over.” Jed rebutted.

“But I’m back now.”

The other tribrid huffed a faint laugh and smiled. “This is great. A pack who doesn’t even know who their Alpha is. If you guys are so unsure, I’m more than happy to step to the plate.”

Jed stepped up to him and growled. “You think this is funny? You come in here, kill one of us and--"

"Okay, that's enough," Hope said, stepping  in and pulling her brother away. "I think we found out how well you get along with the werewolves. Cain, let's  go."

Then while walking  in silence, led by Hope  of course, they ran  into MG, Kaleb and  a couple  of vampires who were standoffish to him. The new kid that single head managed to create  tension  between  them and  the rest of the factions.

But then MG, being  the  diplomat, decided to  be the first to engage Cain in conversation even though just  his presence made him nervous. They sat and  chatted-- which felt more like an interrogation  on Cain's end, talking about the ups and  downs of being a vampire.

 "You think we can trust him?" Kaleb  asked Hope  as  they  both  stood by and  watched the other two.

"Hell no." Hope said  bluntly. "But Dr. Saltzman  says until  we find  out  he has a M.O. besides  yesterday he hasn't  really  given us a reason  not to trust him."

"What if he really doesn't have a game and  just wants to be your brother?"

"Trust  me, I know  my family."

MG and  Cain  talking until  MG's discomfort finally  reached  its  peak.

"I do have another  question," Cain  began, leaning  forward  with  his eyes even more on MG than  they were. "Do you get any rippers here? I mean with how many  vampires  that are here, there has bound  at least  one  loose canon."

MG immediately  tensed  up but tried to hide under a nervous  smile.

"Have you met with  the witches, yet? You can probably catch them at the mill, they hang out  there all the time." he said, quickly changing  the subject.

And  with that cue Hope got up from  the wall. "MG's  right. The sooner  we're  done mingling  the sooner  I can get you back  downstairs  and  do some studying."

And  again  She dragged  her brother off to somewhere  else. The witches were at the mill as they socialized amongst  themselves, then all heads turned as soon as the two Mikaelsons stood  at one of  the entrances.

They walked in some more and  just as Hope assumed  there was going  to be tension  like the other two factions, the witches started to gather around them. Although  some witches kept their distance, the  others seemed  to want  to meet  the newcomer.

"So you're  Hope's brother?" Alyssa Chang said, being  the first  to speak.

"Lost and found." Cain replied.

"Well, let's just hope being  a buzzkill isn't hereditary.”

His lip twitched with amusement. "I can assure  you I'm lots of fun." he said, his eyes glancing  over at Lizzie.

"Does this mean you're also a tribrid?" another witch asked.

"Yep. I'm the whole  package."

The witches brought him over  to sit down as they continued  to ask him more things, fascinated  by  him as if he was an exotic animal  or something. And Cain  very much  seemed to be enjoying the attention. Hope looked a little confused as they pulled  him away. 

"They're  acting  like  they've  never  met a tribrid  before." she said  to herself. But on the plus side she knew  she didn't  have  to watch  him as closely anymore. 

After a while, Cain managed to slip away  from the witches  and  found his way to Lizzie  who was on the staircase.

"So you're a witch." he said, pleased.

"How'd  you  figure  that out?" she said, oozing with sarcasm.

"I was just wondering  why you were with  the others."

"I already  met a tribrid. Wasn't  impressed by the first one, not gonna be by the second  one."

"I think  I can  come  up with a few other  ways  to impress you."

She looked over at him. "Never gonna happen."

They sat in silence for a moment  until Cain glanced  over to his sister and  Josie.

"I can't  believe  you and  my sister are friends."

Lizzie looked at him confused.

"I mean  from  what  I've… heard  you two had quite the rivalry. But I can relate, my parents did spend  way more  time  with  her than  me too."

"My dad actually knows I exist. It's  different."

"Is it really?"

The blonde clenched  her jaw right before walking  off. "Your new brother is annoying."

"Tell me about it," Hope said.

That led to a  rant about  how  this whole situation and  Cain showing up out of nowhere felt like  an inconvenience to her. While Cain went back to the witches.

After, Hope  realized how much time had  passed and  decided it was time  for  Cain  to get back  to the cell.

"Alright, time to go."

Cain looked up at her from the couch. "Come on, I just  started  making  friends."

"And  I have  to study for  a class  tomorrow." That and she'd been around him enough for  the day.

Cain let out a little sigh before getting up. Although  he was a little  disappointed  it was time to  leave, he figured if he wanted to get in his sister's  good  graces going  against  her wasn't  the way to go.

They walked  together  in silence again  because the last  thing that Hope  would  want  to  do with  some sketchy stranger  is have  a friendly  conversation or share her whole life story.

"I like the witches," he said, "especially your  friend, Lizzie."

Hope couldn't  help  the snort. "Good luck  with that."

"You take after Mom, don't  you?" he said, catching  her way off guard. "Based  on the things  I've  heard  people  say about  her. I also  came across  a picture  this  one time. You look like  her too." This made her  pause for  a second. She knew  that they were  family but  somehow actually talking about their  family-- key alone  their parents-- seemed  to be the last thing she'd  expected. "Do I look like either of them to you?"

After that, the moment  she looked  into  his  eyes, a bunch  of images of Klaus  raced through  her mind. 

"You have his nose," she said softly before quickly turning  away and  going back to walking.

[spookyboywhump]

I once said that Vanessa likes to take videos of Zander

CW: pet whump, knives, noncon kiss Kinda, strangulation

***

“Come on my love, say it.” Her voice could be heard saying sweetly. The video was focused entirely on Zander though, on his bright red face, tears shining in his eyes. He was laying down, she must’ve been straddling his waist to hold the camera over him like this. His hair was a mess, like she’d been running her fingers through it, pulling at it, and his arms seemed to be raised above his head. Her free hand held her special knife for him, the blade pressed against his throat, forcing him to tilt his head back slightly.

“I… I…” He seemed to struggle to get the words out, pausing to take a deep, shuddering breath.

“You know what I want to hear. Will you say it for me, darling?”

“I-I… I love you…” He said softly, squeezing his eyes shut.

“Look at me.” She ordered, a strict edge to her voice. He looked miserable but he opened his teary brown eyes to look up at her. “Aww, there you are… say it again.”

“I love you…” He winced as she pressed the blade into his throat, just enough to make the slightest cut.

“Hm?”

“I love you!” He snapped. “I love you, Vanessa, I love you, I love you, I love you!”

“You’re so sweet!” She giggled. “I love you too, Zander. And do you love anyone else?”

“N-no… only you…” He murmured. “No one else…”

“Of course you don’t. Sweet boy, you already know I’m all you need, don’t you?” She finally pulled the blade away from his throat, using the tip to push some loose strands of hair from his face.

“You’re all I need…” He repeated without having to be prompted.

“That’s right. No one else could ever love you like I do.” She told him. “You know that, right?”

“I know…” He sounded heartbroken when he said it. It was hard to tell if he really believed it or if he was just trying to please her.

“You do! You are such a good boy.” She told him, and that was where the video ended.

***

Zander kept his eyes shut when she leaned down and her lips met his, but he leaned into the kiss anyway. There really was no point in resisting. His wrists were bound above his head, he was exhausted physically and emotionally. He wanted this to end.

“You’re mine, you know that?” She said when she pulled back. He was tired of hearing that. He didn’t want to be her’s, or Cain’s, or anyone’s.

Well, maybe one person.

That person wasn’t her though. It never would be, in fact, he would prefer belonging to anyone but her. He knew what she wanted to hear, and he knew she wouldn’t take disobedience well, but she wasn’t holding a blade to his throat anymore. He didn’t have to recite his lines anymore.

“I’m not…” He said quietly. He opened his eyes to watch her sit up, staring down at him with a dangerous look in her eyes, challenging him to continue to misbehave.

“You want to do this again? You’re mine, dear.” She said slowly, threateningly. She raised her hands, wrapping them around his throat, bare of any collar.

“I hate you.” He said, already anticipating the way her grip tightened. There would be even more bruises around his neck the next day. His throat would hurt if she squeezed hard enough. He wouldn’t be able to speak for much longer. And still, he chose to use his last breath for words to say, “I will fucking never be yours.”

[katzkinder]

Cain vs Abel. Envy vs Lust.

While talking with a friend about what we wanted to see from Servamp going forward, the topic of a real Envy vs Lust pair fight came up and boi, gimme a brother versus brother smackdown for real, c’mon Strike, please, it would be such a great way to showcase Misono and Lily’s growth, as well as how their relationship has evolved.

Specifically I want Misono to beat Mikuni’s cocky ass into the dirt, and as my friend Fibi put it, eat his cowboy words from back in Volume 3 when he said that “your Lily can never beat my Jeje.”

But I also want Misono to grab Mikuni by the front while he's on the ground, tears in his eyes and screaming in his face to let him help him, stop doing everything on your own, you have people who love you! And Lily's behind him, injured but still standing while Jeje doesn't dare move from where Lily has him pinned with his scythe to his throat because the only way to get Misono off of Mikuni would be to hurt him, and he has no illusions about just where he ranks on Mikuni's ladder of importance.

At the same time, I feel like Mikuni is holding back massively in terms of what he can pull off with Jeje, but that Misono, once Lily has been cured, will also pull out some absolutely bonkers stuff... But he's weak in terms of creativity, which is what makes a Servamp Eve pair's arsenal the most potent. Mikuni has creativity in leaps and bounds. So if Misono wants to beat him... He's going to need input from his friends.

Something in specific I’ve thought about is Misono getting an idea from Greed pair’s Jekyll and Hyde technique, coming up with an ability that allows him to “castle” with Lily.

For anyone who doesn’t know what that means, castling is a type of special move you can do during chess that allows you to change the positions of your Rook and your King, where the King will end up behind the Rook. Basically, this ability of theirs would allow Lily and Misono to swap places with each other. Pretty nifty, right? Especially for someone as physically weak as Misono, to be able to have his Servamp tag in and take a blow for him would be incredibly useful.

--But for dealing with Mikuni in particular, it gets even better.

You see, something else Misono needs to do, and something he hasn’t really gotten the opportunity to do yet, is learn to work with Lily’s innate abilities properly, rather than being so straightforward with his attacks. I also think, by the time this showdown takes place, Misono would not only be secure in the fact Mikuni loves him, but also crafty enough to realize Mikuni won't severely hurt him, will literally command Jeje to pull his shot if he gets too in the way, and making that his advantage.

How is this important? Because of the way My Fair Lady functions. My Fair Lady is an ability that isn’t indiscriminate. It is bodycount based, and that is very important here because Lily? Lily has absolutely killed people. But he’s also a Servamp, so using it on him won’t kill him, no matter what. It’ll just neutralize him.

Now, Misono? Misono has not killed anyone. And he can use that.

Normally that castling technique I mentioned would be used to pull Misono out of the line of fire. But, against Mikuni… He’d use it to put himself in it. In the way of Mikuni’s Lead.

Another thing I’d love to see is Misono “breaking the game,” so to speak, because it was never Misono getting frustrated and quitting that stunted his growth as a tactician. It was his father and his brother not allowing him to lose. He’d always be sent to bed before the game was finished, which is why the first ability Lily gave him was so important. 

No one leaves until the game is done. 

And honestly? That is an incredibly powerful ability. To create an entire alternate reality in which to fight in, away from interference, the cavalry, and escape... Misono is so much stronger than anyone realizes.

And I feel like canon is purposefully trying to nudge our eye away from that.

Like, let’s look at Misono’s Lead for a moment. He's able to bring it out and dispel it so easily that no one even notices anything strange aside from "where did that chair come from?" Wielding his own and Lily's abilities are as easy as breathing for him. I also love how smart he was with the way Execution Block of the Red Queen is set up, because he knows that an Eve is at their most vulnerable without their Servamp, and he knows that opponents familiar with the contract system are going to instinctively gun for him when they notice Lily has separated from him, becoming overconfident in the fact Misono is weak and Lily appears to be so airheaded that they don't think for a second that Lily going so far from him is 100% on purpose

And not only is the way it's implemented fantastic, because it's a move that attacks the target's psyche and does no harm to their body, it's great for taking hostages. Misono is cutthroat and it is ridiculous.

A lot of times, when people even bother to remember Misono at all what bitter no I’m totally not bitter, they mistake his inexperience for naivety, his reluctance to disobey his father’s emotional manipulation for obedience, and his smart mouth as being something that’s just for show. Goody two shoes misono is so funny, like

Mahiru literally had to be like "no?! what the fuck is wrong with you??" when Misono suggested interrogating lilac, and then had to be kind of forceful with him again when he suggested they doublecross Tsubaki and keep Lilac as a bargaining chip. Not to mention the fact that he drugged! Sakuya!! In a basement!!!

He is so incredibly shrewd it's not even funny

--But he is also… Very kind. And sweet. And loving. He listens to Mahiru’s concerns. He wants to do whatever he can to comfort Tetsu in his time of need. He trusts Lily so, so much, and that trust shows itself most readily with… Again, Execution Block of the Red Queen. Like that move is dangerous, though the danger is part of the point. Still, it requires utter faith that if he allows Lily to stray from him and makes himself into a decoy, Lily will be ready to pull off the attack before Misono is hurt. And Lily is always exactly where Misono needs him to be.

Speaking of how kind Misono is capable of being while also being a ruthless son of a bitch… I have another, separate post in the works about two important groups of foils to one another in the Servamp universe, and I’m super looking forward to sharing it, so please look forward to it!!