#Energy security concept

[amereid1960]

الأمن الطاقوي الروسي بين الفرص والقيود

الأمن الطاقوي الروسي بين الفرص والقيود الأمن الطاقوي الروسي بين الفرص والقيود الكاتب : محفوظ رسول الملخص: يهدف هذا المقال إلى فهم وتحليل واقع الأمن الطاقوي الروسي على ضوء التحديات الطاقوية الراهنة التي تواجه روسيا؛ والتي تضم توليفة واسعة من التحديات الطاقوية ذات البعد الداخلي؛ المتمثلة في صعوبة الاستخراج الكافي لمصادر الطاقة، وكذا نقص التقنيات الروسية اللازمة لاستخراج تلك المصادر. فضلا عن تلك…

[alewaanewspaper1960]

الأمن الطاقوي الروسي بين الفرص والقيود

الأمن الطاقوي الروسي بين الفرص والقيود الأمن الطاقوي الروسي بين الفرص والقيود الكاتب : محفوظ رسول الملخص: يهدف هذا المقال إلى فهم وتحليل واقع الأمن الطاقوي الروسي على ضوء التحديات الطاقوية الراهنة التي تواجه روسيا؛ والتي تضم توليفة واسعة من التحديات الطاقوية ذات البعد الداخلي؛ المتمثلة في صعوبة الاستخراج الكافي لمصادر الطاقة، وكذا نقص التقنيات الروسية اللازمة لاستخراج تلك المصادر. فضلا عن تلك…

[tastyflowers]

waugh

[galactic-drops]

Sundrop love listening to Hatsune Miku.

That's it that's the post.

[shakespearerants]

My favourite Eliot Spencer character trait is Friend-shaped To Children. Nate can't look at children without crying. Sophie is politely baffled at the concept of Humans Who Don't Understand Complicated Psychological Concepts Because They Are Literally 6 Years Old. Hardison has older brother energy, which is to say children are comfortable in his presence but they don't actively seek him out, unless of course to play an epic prank akin to the great tradition of Ring and Ditch or Spell ICUP. Parker will try to protect any child she can, but under-12s without autistic criminal intent don't really connect with her, unless of course they are Traumatized™.

Eliot Spencer is continuously sought out by children of all ages. Traumatized or not? Does not matter. Literally baby or cool teen? Does not matter. They will come up to him while he is glaring daggers or actively planning to murder someone and ask him to hold their hands through the security check at the airport. And you know what? He does. He holds their hand every single time.

[astro-enthusiast]

moon signs and what you learned from your mother (raw & uncut)

I’m not a professional astrologer, just an enthusiast. These are possible manifestations of attributes your mother taught you based on your moon sign.

WARNING: this is clear cut, no BS, straight to the point. There’s pros and cons for every moon sign. There’s no way around it.

DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES PLAGIARIZE MY WORK.

Aries Moon: your mother taught you how to fight, how to be resilient, how to depend on yourself and no one else. Your mother probably led with masculine energy. There’s an added layer of aggression in your relationship. She taught you how to be “tough.” You were likely raised by one parent for some reason (I’ve seen this be caused by the death of a parent at a young age or a parent who chooses not to be around due to strained rxship).

Taurus Moon: your mother taught you how to chill. Hard. You probably wanted for nothing. Money, security, stability- you had it all. You know how to eat, sleep, wake up, and do it all again. Maybe your home was uneventful growing up. You know how to make money and spend it just as well. Your mother likely didn’t do much that’s worth noting. She taught you how to work and chill out. This is a very narrow manifestation of this sign.

Gemini Moon: your mother taught you how to blend in to any crowd. You two probably gossiped together. Your mother may have provided the ultimate “How to Be Well Perceived” guide for you. How to hold a conversation with anyone. How to intellectualize emotions rather than actually feeling them. You can think or talk your way out of any situation, which may be a double edged sword as this can and will get you into trouble.

Cancer Moon: your mother taught you how to play the victim. How to become overly sensitized to other people’s emotions and the slightest change in their energies. How to be in touch with your own inner world; how to manipulate or be manipulated. You likely played a motherly role in life, but this is affected by house placements and aspects. Ex. A cancer moon in the 10th house may show their more nurturing side in public, but not so much at home.

Leo Moon: your mother taught you how to be flamboyant; how to prioritize yourself and your own emotions over others; how to lighten up the mood- likely to avoid dealing with heavier subjects. How to be the ✨golden child✨. But also, you as the child might have to step aside so your mom can have the true spotlight. At the end of the day, she comes first in her mind.

Virgo Moon: your mother taught you how to be “helpful,” likely to your own detriment. How to shut your mouth and sacrifice yourself and your well being for your family. How to be an adult from a very young age; you probably didn’t have a childhood. I’ve seen wayyy too many people with this placement parenting their own parents and other peoples kids while they themselves are literal children. Did you raise your mother or did your mother raise you? Your mother likely has no concept of your personal boundaries. If you place any, she’s surprised by the utter audacity. Also (trigger warning: violence) many Virgo moons mother’s are physically abusive. Does your mom randomly slap you when she’s mad? Just know you’re more than a maid or a punching bag. You are a person. I could write a whole book on this placement just based on the pure chaos of it. I’m so sorry. I love you.

Libra Moon: your mother taught you how to keep up with your appearances; that looks and what people think is far more important than any feeling you may experience. She taught you how to be well-liked and how to create a fake personality to keep others comfortable. If you’re feeling sad, you probably just need a new outfit or lipgloss to add an attempted cover to the crap that’s lurking in your subconscious mind.

Scorpio Moon: God help us all. Your mother taught you how to be afraid. Literally. Your baseline is likely fear which is learned directly from the mother. Your mother taught you how to manipulate as you see fit, which of course includes manipulating her as well. This likely goes both ways. You were taught to be emotionally in tune with your mother, with no boundaries or consideration for how you as an individual feel. Trust issues beyond comprehension. But you can’t help it, it’s literally in your blood. Also, love is not possession and control. You need to let that belief go, babe.

Sagittarius Moon: your mother taught you how to ignore anything that isn’t sunshine and rainbows, shut up, and keep it to pushing. Emotions were not a thing in your home. You’d be crazy to feel anything but joy. If you do, you’re considered ungrateful. Your mother was likely distant for some reason. Even if physically present, there was no emotional connection. But hey, at least she taught you new languages and exposed you to different cultures, right?

Capricorn Moon: (signs, “Santa Maria”). No, I am not here as another random person on Tumblr who thinks they know Capricorn moons. I’m here as someone who actually knows Capricorn moons. Your mother taught you how to put on a brave face, work until you can taste your own blood, and don’t stop for even a moment to think of what’s lurking under the surface. If you work really hard, you won’t even have a chance to notice all the baggage you’re carrying around! Anddd you’ll have piles of money to dry any tears that threaten to escape. You probably cry in your closet for complete and total privacy. Or not, maybe that’s just me. You’re taught to be the backbone of the family. Everything would probably collapse without you. But hey, no pressure, right?

Aquarius Moon: your mother taught you how to detach from any and all emotions. Do you even feel what you’re feeling? Or are your emotions solely for research purposes? Asking for a friend. You likely live away from your mother. She may even be on a completely different continent. Your mother is likely your friend at best, and a complete stranger at worst. Your friends are your family. You likely felt the need to escape your family from a young age. Maybe you were even embarrassed of how “weird” your family was. But alas, we can always make our own families out of friends. 💜

Pisces Moon: your mother taught you how to be the victim. Honestly, this might go for all water moons. Just apply that to this whole element. Your relationship with your mother may have been an emotional rollercoaster. Do you ever get off to take breaks? Perhaps your mother took on a more Neptunian approach to your relationship and she’s so emotionally distant you couldn’t catch her if you tried. How’s your sleep schedule? Maybe you sleep to avoid the feelings that are just too hard to deal with. Subliminal meditations are your friend.

I had a blast writing this. Let me know what you think!

RIGHTS RESERVED TO MY BLOG astro-enthusiast . DO NOT COPY, REWRITE, OR PLAGIARIZE MY WORK. DO NOT REPOST MY WORK WITHOUT MY PERMISSION.

[sokosmic]

Astro Observations #8

📧 Scorpio placements love to probe people for information. This is actually something that comes very natural to them and is often an unconscious behavior. Often the Scorpio doesn't even have to do anything. People tend to reveal themselves willingly and unwillingly. This is the nature of Pluto. It naturally uncovers whatever is hidden. Planets in the 8th House can behave this way as well.

📧 The sign in your 3rd House can give clues about the type of work you may be involved in. Because a theme of the 3rd House includes short distance trips, such as your day-to-day commute, the sign ruling this house often goes hand-in-hand with your work. For instance, I have Leo in the 3H. Leo rules government (source: the rulership book by rex e. bills). I have worked in government for almost 20 yrs.

📧 Mutable Signs/Placements move on their own time. Even if they are punctual, their desire to do things when they want takes priority. It's the nature of scattered energy.

📧 Saturn in the 4th House can indicate karma with the mother or native's family. This placement often requires a lot of obligation to the mother/family . The native feels bound by the obligations and often wishes to escape, but may also feel a sense of duty and embrace their role as the glue in the family. Capricorn ruling the 4th House may also manifest this way.

📧 A 1st House Lilith may attract unsolicited sexual energy. These people have a very natural sex appeal that they may or may not be aware of. And it may not be because of what you would identify as things that are overtly sexy

📧 I've noticed a theme among women with Capricorn in 5th House or Ruler of the 10th in the 4th House is they are often stay at home mothers.

📧 People with Pluto square Mercury have a real tendency to try and tear you down with their words. This isn't always the case, but if threatened or feel they need to gain the upper hand in a conversation, they are very likely to lash out with viscous words. Mars square Mercury can behave similarly, but they are usually the folks that tend to cut others off in conversation.

📧 Cancer placements would much rather purchase you an item than to share that item of their own. It's not that they are necessarily stingy, they just like the security of knowing something belongs to them and exactly when they may need to replace it.

📧 Mars in Libra people can be big procrastinators because they have a tendency towards indecisiveness. These are people who sometimes ride the fence because Libra energy can see all sides.

📧 If you've ever had a terrible experience with a supervisor that goes overboard with micro-managing, it is very likely they are Pluto in Virgo generation. These folks thrive off of getting down to the details, and having some sort of control over outcomes, so nothing goes unnoticed...including EVERYTHING you do lol.

📧 People with Cancer in the 6th House or Aquarius Risings may be annoyingly anal, but in a kinda good way, about taking care of their coworkers or things in the workplace. They may tend to stress over things being out of place or generally keeping up with how things should be "taken care of" in the work environment. This stress can lead to gut and stomach issues, such as ulcers or indigestion. Their daily routines often involves them taking care of things to ensure security for themselves and others.

📧 My studies have shown that the North Node sign and placement, often correlates to the native's Life Path number!

📧 Pisces Mercury / Pisces 3rd House folks are some of the most difficult people [for me] to understand at times! Their minds and mode of communication can be very abstract, which isn't hard to follow (especially if you are Mutable/Mercurial like me), but at times it's like you think they are saying one thing, but their theory isn't translating into a relatable, concrete concept. And there's nothing wrong with that. Pisces Mercury people are HIGHLY creative and artistic. These are your fashionistas, makeup artists, musicians, and poets. They also make great actors.

📧 Moon in Gemini folks can be some of the best storytellers! They use lots of funny words and phrases to express their emotions through their stories. They often get a bad rap for switching up often, but to me, they have an impressive way of intertwining emotions and intellect. If I had to describe them in 2 words, it would be plot twist lol.

📧 Neptune in the 5th House can cause pregnancies to be elusive or deceptive in some form, such as false signs of pregnancy or having difficulty carrying pregnancies to term.

These are my observations and opinions. Take what resonates and leave what doesn't!

-So.Kosmic 👽💜💫

[everparanoid]

how genshin men hug you

various genshin men x gn! reader

characters: Alhaitham, Diluc, Itto, Neuvillette, Wriothesley

Alhaitham isn’t one for hugs, but he’s not against you snuggling into him as he reads, seated between his legs. You might have to ask him several times for a hug, and more often than not, you’ll be met with a ‘no’. However, on those rare occasions when he’s feeling tired and lazy, he might just pull you into a hug as he lounges around. If you try to talk while he’s resting his head on yours, he’ll shush you, not wanting his break to be disturbed. So, with Alhaitham, it’s less about the hugs and more about quiet, shared moments.

Diluc is a man of few words, but his hugs speak volumes. He may be reserved, even in private, but he won’t hesitate to give you a hug if you ask. He might not initiate them often, but he does enjoy these moments of closeness with you. His hugs are warm and comforting, making you feel safe and cherished. They might not last long, but they’re always memorable. If you were to hug him when he returns from defending Mondstadt in the middle of the night, he would welcome you into his side. He’d wrap an arm around you gently, allowing you to listen to his steady heartbeat, a reassuring reminder that he’s returned safely.

Itto is a true enthusiast when it comes to hugs. He’s the kind of person who will envelop you in a warm, enthusiastic embrace, regardless of where you are. Public or private, it doesn’t matter to him. His hugs are playful and full of energy. He’ll lift you off the ground, spinning you around in a whirl of joy. Especially after a rare victory in a Beetle Brawl, you can expect a celebratory hug from him. His hugs are innocent and endearing, often accompanied by a wide grin and exuberant cheers of happiness. It’s clear that Itto enjoys these moments of shared joy just as much as you do. His hugs are not just an expression of affection, but a testament to his vibrant and joyful spirit.

Neuvillette is a man who is reserved and formal, and he’s not familiar with the concept of a hug, even though he’s seen them during his time in Fontaine. The first time you hug him, it might be a bit awkward until he gets used to the close contact. Every time Neuvillette hugs you, it’s gentle and cautious, as if he’s still trying to figure out the correct way to do it. He doesn’t often ask for hugs, but when it starts to rain, that’s your sign that he could use one. His hugs can be unusually long because he doesn’t understand the socially acceptable duration for a hug, and you don’t want to correct him. Alternatively, they can be short but meaningful. If he’s feeling down, he might hold on a bit longer, and of course, you’re perfectly fine with that.

Wriothesley is a man who cherishes private moments of closeness. He’s the type to give you a full-body hug, much like the comforting embrace of a teddy bear. If he happens to retire to bed before you, he might fall asleep on top of you, his arms wrapped around your waist. More often than not, you’ll already be asleep when he comes to bed. In these instances, he’ll spoon you into his arms, providing a sense of security and warmth. While he may not be one for overt public displays of affection, when it’s just the two of you, he’s all about the hugs. You might often find yourself sitting in his lap as he reads the newspaper, one arm casually draped over your stomach, his head resting on your shoulder. It seems that Wriothesley has a particular fondness for your body heat, especially in the chilly depths of Meropide.

masterlist

Reblogs w/ tags and comments are very much appreciated! If you enjoyed this, feel free to follow me! <3

Also, if you like my writing and wish to support me, please consider buying me a coffee via Ko-fi!

[vivmaek]

Moon Transits

✰ my masterlist I made a quick cheat sheet for Moon transits using my notes from Planets in Transit by Robert Hand.

House Placements

｡･:*˚:✧｡ Moon in the First House

✧Feeling a need to surround oneself with friends and family. ✧Wanting to be a part of some sort of group. ✧In tune with the feelings of others. ✧Prioritizing personal needs. ✧Seeking out support/feeling a need to be nurtured.

｡･:*˚:✧｡ Moon in the Second House

✧Going through a box filled with old mementos. ✧Wearing clothing that expresses how you feel. ✧Buying objects that have nostalgic value. ✧Spending money based on subconscious drives. ✧Being impulsive with money.

｡･:*˚:✧｡ Moon in the Third House

✧Having deep/meaningful conversations with others. ✧Having intuitive insights. ✧Communicating from a place of authenticity. ✧Falling into thought patterns from the past. ✧Projecting narratives from the past onto the present situation.

｡･:*˚:✧｡ Moon in the Fourth House

✧Prioritizing spending time at home. ✧Feeling burnt out and overwhelmed. ✧Situations and events forcing you to go inwards. ✧Not accomplishing much. ✧Feeling more insecure and clingy than usual.

｡･:*˚:✧｡ Moon in the Fifth House

✧Being unable to hide emotions. ✧Feeling wrapped up in oneself. ✧A natural sense of romance existing within daily life. ✧Having deep/meaningful conversations with a romantic partner. ✧Stepping forward to protect/defend someone.

｡･:*˚:✧｡ Moon in the Sixth House

✧Hiding your emotions/pushing them to the side. ✧Playing the role of a martyr. ✧Deep cleaning your entire home. ✧Focusing on personal hygiene and health. ✧Feeling hypercritical.

｡･:*˚:✧｡ Moon in the Seventh House

✧Focusing on personal relationships. ✧Needing support and security. ✧Intense confrontations being met with an emotional response. ✧Your subconscious needs/desires being mirrored by a partner. ✧Lacking a sense of objectivity

｡･:*˚:✧｡ Moon in the Eighth House

✧Highly intense emotional encounters. ✧Experiencing emotions that are not commonly felt. ✧Feeling jealous/possessive ✧Having a desire for control. ✧Your attachment style being challenged in some way.

｡･:*˚:✧｡ Moon in the Ninth House

✧Feeling adventurous and restless. ✧Wanting to break free from the daily routine. ✧Finding joy through study. ✧Feeling drawn towards foreign cultures and ways of life. ✧Being exposed to an idea or concept that excites you.

｡･:*˚:✧｡ Moon in the Tenth House

✧Experiencing an emotional outburst in public. ✧Failing to hide certain aspects about yourself. ✧Blurring the lines between professional and personal relationships. ✧Forging strong bonds with people at work. ✧Winning people over through a display of emotional sensitivity.

｡･:*˚:✧｡ Moon in the Eleventh House

✧Having deep/meaningful conversations with friends. ✧Patterns from childhood being displayed within a friendship. ✧Goals and dreams for the future being affected by past experiences. ✧Catching up with an old friend. ✧Being sought after for support.

｡･:*˚:✧｡ Moon in the Twelfth House

✧Feeling withdrawn and a need to hide oneself. ✧Being secretive about your emotions. ✧Acting upon unconscious fears. ✧Experiencing strong gut instincts. ✧Needing more sleep in comparison to usual.

Aspects

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ Sun

｡･:*˚:✧｡Conjunct

✧Feeling a burst of energy ✧Harmony between mind and feelings. ✧A light is shined upon larger emotional patterns. ✧Having the strength and stamina to carry out tasks. ✧Showing up as your best self.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Sextile

✧Being given an opportunity to relax and take it easy. ✧Attending fun social gatherings. ✧Forging new friendships. ✧Finding joy outside of the home. ✧Experiencing a sense of peace.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Square

✧Facing challenges within daily life. ✧Getting into an argument with family/loved ones. ✧Tensions and inner turmoils being brought to the surface. ✧Feeling more irritable compared to usual. ✧Experiencing a burst of physical energy.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Trine

✧Daily life is running very smoothly. ✧Being driven by a need for pleasure. ✧Engaging in vigorous activity. ✧Having interests that align with a group. ✧Finding that more people are drawn to you compared to usual.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Opposition

✧Feeling incredibly energetic. ✧Having a long to-do list. ✧Having to put hard work and effort into your daily life. ✧Feeling attracted to someone very different than you. ✧Finding a lack of stability within relationships.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ Moon

｡･:*˚:✧｡Conjunct

✧The beginning of a major emotional cycle. ✧Feelings that are experienced now will be a dominant theme for the month. ✧A particular emotion shining through more strongly compared to the rest. ✧Having an easier time attracting what you want into your life. ✧Wanting to surround yourself with what's familiar.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Sextile

✧Wanting to be with family and relatives. ✧Reminiscing over past experiences. ✧Choosing to spend more time at home. ✧Seeking out emotional satisfaction through intimacy. ✧Giving out and receiving good advice.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Square

✧Feeling irritable. ✧Being faced with difficult circumstances. ✧Getting into disagreements with others. ✧Tensions coming to the surface. ✧Unhappy with current domestic situation.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Trine

✧Experiencing a pleasant mood throughout daily life. ✧Giving out emotional support. ✧Seeking out physical comfort. ✧Not feeling a need to leave the house. ✧Feeling comfortable with what you have.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Opposition

✧Experiencing powerful emotions. ✧Feeling caught up within oneself. ✧Being faced with opposing opinions. ✧Feeling a general sense of discomfort. ✧Finding it difficult to express emotions.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ Mercury

｡･:*˚:✧｡Conjunct

✧Talking about your feelings. ✧Try to avoid making a decision. ✧Becoming overwhelmed by minor details. ✧Getting distracted by conversations. ✧Experiencing a sudden change in mood.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Sextile

✧Having an active social life. ✧Gossiping and sharing information about other people. ✧Describing your feelings to others in an effective manner. ✧Seeking out the opinions of others. ✧Receiving lots of texts, and phone calls from friends and loved ones.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Square

✧Other people can’t relate to how you feel. ✧People expressing that they have a problem with you. ✧Having your feelings hurt by the words of another person. ✧Changing your opinion to avoid disagreements. ✧Tensions are released.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Trine

✧Easily expressing your emotions. ✧Lending someone a sympathetic ear or helping hand. ✧Receiving information about loved ones or past experiences. ✧Feeling nostalgic and talking about the good ol’ days. ✧Feeling deeply in touch with your emotions.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Opposition

✧Disliking someone for no good reason. ✧Making unfair judgements and assumptions. ✧Falling into patterns from childhood. ✧Important discussions turning into disagreements. ✧Mistaking emotions for rational thought.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ Venus

｡･:*˚:✧｡Conjunct

✧Attending social engagements and having fun. ✧In high spirits, feeling happy and generous. ✧Throwing a party or attending one. ✧Spending more money than you intend. ✧Experiencing overindulgence.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Sextile

✧Spending time with friends and loved ones. ✧Going on a fantastic date. ✧Building good rapport with another person. ✧Showing affection towards others. ✧Infecting other people with your happy mood.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Square

✧Getting caught up in interesting conversations. ✧Taking the time to get to know someone. ✧Protecting a loved one or giving them some much needed support. ✧Getting lost in the past. ✧Lacking discipline in favor of overindulgence.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Trine ​​

✧Feeling lazy and choosing to ignore work that needs to get done. ✧Eating good food and drink. ✧Tending to the needs of someone else. ✧Enjoying the people around you. ✧Attending fun engagements.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Opposition

✧Giving into self indulgence. ✧Hidden tensions rise to the surface. ✧Prioritizing comfort and luxury. ✧Overstating your feelings. ✧Lacking restraint.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ Mars

｡･:*˚:✧｡Conjunct

✧Losing your cool. ✧Feeling irritable. ✧Getting caught up in trivial matters. ✧Acting impulsively. ✧Attracting in disagreements.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Sextile

✧Working independently. ✧Stepping into a leadership position. ✧Being the first to take initiative. ✧Not backing down when challenged ✧Feelings of passion rising to the surface.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Square

✧Taking hasty action. ✧Feeling over sensitive. ✧People attacking you for seemingly no reason. ✧Getting into an accident/making a mistake. ✧Acting upon insecurity.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Trine

✧Feeling comfortable expressing your opinions and needs. ✧Projecting a sense of emotional strength. ✧Needing a physical release/seeking out exercise. ✧Starting projects with vigor. ✧Feeling excited and filled with energy.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Opposition

✧Becoming angry easily. ✧Feeling loss tolerate and overly critical. ✧Taking impulsive action. ✧Experiencing a disruption of sorts. ✧getting into arguments and disagreements.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ Jupiter

｡･:*˚:✧｡Conjunct

✧Feeling extremely benevolent. ✧Showcasing a high degree of self confidence. ✧Enjoying the presence of a large group. ✧Experiencing a kind act of generosity. ✧Being led by your heart.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Sextile

✧Meeting up with old friends. ✧Reaching out to people who need help. ✧Feeling a sense of togetherness and belonging. ✧Successfully persuading another person. ✧Understanding the needs of other people.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Square

✧Feeling optimistic. ✧Overstepping with your opinions and thoughts. ✧Coming across as self-righteous. ✧Giving out unsolicited advice. ✧Feeling overly generous.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Trine

✧Giving out and receiving affection. ✧Feeling happy and positive. ✧Offering someone a helping hand. ✧Finding a sense of belonging amongst others. ✧Experiencing enjoyable social gatherings.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Opposition

✧People trying to guilt you into helping them. ✧Being driven by a need for freedom. ✧Resisting against limitations that have been placed upon you. ✧Questioning your aspirations. ✧Being faced with existential anxiety.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ Saturn

｡･:*˚:✧｡Conjunct

✧Facing loneliness and isolation. ✧Struggling with feelings of guilt and shame. ✧Feeling dissatisfied with current domestic situation. ✧Falling into a state of pessimism. ✧Lacking support from others.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Sextile

✧Spending time in deep introspection. ✧Seeking out wisdom and advice. ✧Engaging in serious conversations. ✧Showing up for someone in need. ✧Prioritizing your responsibilities.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Square

✧Unsure on how to connect with others. ✧Being unable to read people well. ✧Being overly critical of oneself. ✧Feeling awkward and being faced with embarrassing situations. ✧Experiencing feelings of depression.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Trine

✧Having a good grasp over your emotions. ✧Maintaining a realistic perspective. ✧Remaining patient and steadfast under stress and strain. ✧Thinking about your feelings rather than expressing them. ✧Seeking out solitude.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Opposition

✧Miscommunications and wrongful assumptions are abundant. ✧Not having anyone to turn to. ✧Getting caught up in a bad mood. ✧Focusing on failures and disappointments. ✧Experiencing feelings of loneliness.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ Uranus

｡･:*˚:✧｡Conjunct

✧Experiencing sudden mood swings. ✧Feeling irritable and impatient. ✧Taking impulsive actions. ✧Lacking an ability to concentrate. ✧Unexpectedly saying or doing something you normally wouldn’t.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Sextile

✧Seeking out stimulating experiences. ✧Wanting anything and everything that is new and unknown. ✧Lacking discipline. ✧Wanting more excitement out of daily life. ✧Running into an old friend unexpectedly.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Square

✧Feeling rebellious and outspoken. ✧Seeking out freedom and excitement. ✧Unexpected feelings rising to the surface. ✧Wanting to forgo responsibilities. ✧Rejecting the needs of authority figures.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Trine

✧Developing relationships with interesting and unique people. ✧Acting out of impulsivity. ✧Desiring something new and exciting. ✧Dealing with an unexpected change in plans. ✧Seeking out activities and situations that make you feel alive.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Opposition

✧Feeling disagreeable and defiant. ✧Pushing against restrictions and responsibilities. ✧Overreacting over trivial matters. ✧Receiving a negative surprise. ✧Picking fights with other people.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ Neptune

｡･:*˚:✧｡Conjunct

✧Overrun by feelings of empathy. ✧Feeling particularly sensitive towards the problems of others. ✧Getting lost in fantasies and daydreams. ✧Feeling drawn to artistic expression. ✧Dealing with unrealistic expectations.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Sextile

✧Experiencing an uptick in sensitivity. ✧Tending to the needs of others. ✧Knowing what people need on an intuitive level. ✧Having a paranormal or psychic experience. ✧Engaging in a charitable act.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Square

✧Getting caught up within a fictitious version of reality. ✧Turning to alcohol and drug use. ✧Feeling overly sensitive. ✧Falling into subconscious patterns ✧Being unable to think clearly or make decisions.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Trine

✧Exploring your dreams and fantasies. ✧Feeling disconnected from reality. ✧Spending time on creative projects. ✧Expressing empathy towards others. ✧Picking up on other peoples moods and feeling them yourself.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Opposition

✧Living within a fictitious version of reality. ✧Having a bad reaction when using drugs or alcohol. ✧Struggling with feelings of guilt and shame. ✧Being unable to think clearly. ✧Feeling overwhelmed by insecurity and doubt.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ Pluto

｡･:*˚:✧｡Conjunct

✧Becoming overwhelmed by emotion. ✧Feelings of obsession taking over. ✧Falling into a state of deep discomfort. ✧Coming into contact with your subconscious. ✧Experiencing a need to gain power.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Sextile

✧Seeking out answers and deep meaning from loved ones. ✧Actively going out of your way to dig below the surface. ✧Deep cleaning the home and getting rid of things no longer needed. ✧Playing the role of a detective. ✧Dealing with long standing issues within relationships.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Square

✧Feeling impulsive. ✧No longer being able to hide your feelings. ✧Being faced with a confrontation. ✧Discovering a hidden desire of yours. ✧Engaging in a power struggle.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Trine

✧Intense emotions rise to the surface. ✧Finding deep connection through sexual encounters. ✧Feeling passionate and fierce. ✧Skipping past shallow conversation. ✧Seeking solidarity with loved ones.

｡･:*˚:✧｡Opposition

✧Becoming emotionally exhausted. ✧Being faced with intense encounters. ✧The subconscious mind overrides all conscious action. ✧Getting caught up within a power struggle. ✧Expressing powerful emotions.

[tsukimefuku]

blunt trauma ♰ nanami kento

summary: your mission is to execute a curse user. the issue? said curse user is nanami kento, your former high school classmate and the man who you still secretly love.

tags and cw: dark content, no use of y/n, sorcerer!f!reader, villain!nanami, +18, explicit smut (mostly rough with tender moments hate/love sex), unprotected sex (wrap it, ppl), masturbation, oral (f receiving), pv, from enemies to enemies who fucked 👍, drama and angst (i’m a latina who grew up watching telenovelas), mentions of death, canon-typical violence, ptsd, cursing, hurt/no comfort, this man is saltier than the sea and turned it into everybody else's problem. 

wc: 7.5k

notes etc.: somehow it became a character study. this is my rendition of what i think gege would make nanami to be like if they followed their original plan and had nanami be a villain. inspo list is so huge i had to make a playlist, i got carried away.

writing/reading soundtrack: playlist link ; main songs → way down we go (kaleo) and daylight (david kushner).

disclaimer: i do not in any way approve of (or encourage) the relationship depicted here. it is toxic and bad for all parties involved. this is fictional and should stay that way.

oh, father, tell me ♰ do we get what we deserve?

It felt like the air had been beaten out of your lungs by the very one and only blunt blade you ever knew when you heard the news from Gojo.

Of course the first thing he did when he finished wrapping things up was calling you. If roles were reversed, and this had been Geto, he wouldn't expect any less from you.

During the School's Exchange Event, Jujutsu High was attacked by multiple high grade curses and curse users.

One of them was your former best friend from high school, Nanami Kento. 

"Are you certain it was him?"

"Absolutely," Gojo replied on the other side of the line, "there were traces of cursed energy from his cursed technique. He was also spotted by one of MeiMei's ravens."

"And how many students did he…"

"Two students from Kyoto."

Your head instantly felt dizzy.

"He also killed around a dozen assistants and people securing cursed objects underground."

"Shit… shit," you muttered, forgetting for a few seconds what words were and how to form a coherent sentence. Following suit, your stomach dropped with a sinking ache the moment you made the obvious realization, uttering the most painful thing you had to say in your life — even worse than he's gone, so many years before.

 "This will earn him a death sentence, won't it?"

Gojo was silent for a few moments.

"Hey…"

"Tell me. I can take it."

After a bated breath — from your end, mostly — he confirmed your worst fears.

"Yes. It will."

Ever since Geto's and Nanami's defection, you and Gojo had a special type of shared sorrow over each other's failures to save the people you both loved the most. Call it trauma bonding or codependency, but you developed an unwavering sense of loyalty towards one another.

For that reason, he already knew what you were about to ask him, and you only would because you knew he wouldn't find it in himself to refuse it.

"When it happens, please, have me be appointed as the executioner."

"Of course."

Sitting with a glass of whiskey while gazing out of the window in an understated house just by the outskirts of Sendai, Nanami couldn't say he was fulfilled, unable to grasp the concept of feeling in any way elated ever since his teenage years. However, he was definitely satisfied that this plan had worked.

He managed to put a dent into Jujutsu Society, aiding Geto — or, at least, someone that looked like him, not that Nanami truly cared about it by this point — in retrieving multiple cursed objects that would be used for their inevitable fallout.

There had been a few casualties, though.

Two students and many personnel died — or rather, met their fateful end by the edge of his blunt blade —, but some deaths should be expected if Jujutsu Society was to be brought to the ground, down to its last brick.

Ever since that fateful day when he was nothing but a tall child sitting beside the cold corpse of his best friend, Yu Haibara, Nanami had simmered what would become a cauldron of absolute venom-dripping rage against Jujutsu Society.

To hell with saving other people — what about them? What about the teenager that would never grow to be a sorcerer, who became an inanimate nothing before ever getting the chance of making something out of himself? 

That face… Nanami could never forget it. It haunted his dreams, even a decade later. Such a stark contrast between the light-spirited smiles and this cold, gray monolith that laid in the morgue.

They had no right to rob their students from their youth, much less from their lives, but that's exactly what Jujutsu High did when they didn't even bother to check the mission appropriately before dispatching Haibara and Nanami to a certain death.

Nanami escaped, but just barely, by the skin of his teeth. Haibara, however, wasn't blessed with the same luck, and drew the short straw when his hitched final breaths met their end against Nanami's shoulder. Nanami, who carried his best friend on his back, desperately tried to win a losing race against death. 

Help was late to arrive.

They were too late for Haibara.

And, in a sense, they were too late for him, too.

The worst part, though, was when they were finally being transported all the way back to Jujutsu High. As he glanced over Haibara’s cadaver, now covered by a body bag, one particularly insensitive assistant very rudely stated, “at least there is a body to be buried.”

At least

There is a body 

To be buried

Those words echoed in his head for what felt like eternity. Was that the best they all had to hope for? To at least have remains left behind for the mourning?

In any case, that was why, even though he had to kill, Nanami never mangled any of his human victims — something not easy to do, given how his technique worked and how easy it was to split someone in half.

You had noticed this perverted benevolence while looking over the necropsy reports, a realization that just added insult to injury.

Let there be something for the funeral, I suppose, was what he told himself.

In his own twisted way, Nanami figured this was a kindness very few sorcerers received at their tragic ends, and decided he'd definitely be more compassionate than what Jujutsu High put their sorcerers through. 

In his eyes, those from Jujutsu High who died under his will were the ones granted a truly merciful death.

His peace was disturbed by the sound of the entrance door being brutally kicked in, flying its way across the living room. He pulled his blunt blade from the side of his armchair with his free hand, but quickly put it down when realizing it was you that had just barged inside.

He knew you very well — well enough to be certain you wouldn't come swinging at him immediately.

"I can see you still have a temper. Destroying the door wasn’t necessary, I would've opened it for you," he stated, sipping on his drink.

"I don't care," you retorted, "I guess you already know why I'm here, in any case."

"I do. You're here to carry out my death sentence," he stated, completely unbothered, as if talking about the weather.

As if he was just mundanely stuck in his ways. 

You huffed, placing your hand over your sword's handle.

"Precisely."

"We haven't spoken in a long time, why don't you take a seat?" Nanami inquired, pointing at the armchair right in front of him. "I want to finish my drink."

You glared at the curse user, as he, unfazed, kept gulping on his whiskey. Nanami was wearing a black buttoned shirt, black pants and black oxford shoes, and you couldn't help but see him as a grim reaper — this was a somber look, fitting for the equally somber man who carried it.

For a second, you took in his features — you hadn’t seen Nanami for a few years after the last time you crossed paths.

His shoulders had slightly broadened, and he still bore the same chiseled face, framed by his sand-blond hair neatly slicked back.

Nanami’s eyes traveled over you quickly, apparently doing the very same thing.

Time had left its marks. It was evident you both had grown up — and apart.

You knew this was a shit idea, but entertained it enough that you actually walked towards the chair and sat down. There were definitely things to be talked about, and you just about had a million questions for him.

Most of them, however, boiled down to what you immediately asked.

"Why did you do it?"

Nanami put his glass on the coffee table right in front of you.

"It was a necessary means to an end."

His words came with frost-bitten coldness, his voice embodying the monotone you once loved, but eventually, grew to hate.

You scoffed, incredulous at his reply, involuntarily clenching your fingers around your katana's handle as it laid on your lap.

"Necessary means to an end? Nanami, you killed teenage sorcerers!"

"As I said, and I don't like repeating myself," he interjected, "it was a necessary sacrifice for a greater cause."

"You're such a hypocritical, self-righteous ass!"

Nanami sighed, clearly displeased.

"We have always been able to keep some semblance of respect for each other, despite our… differences. Do not use that foul language with me."

You laughed bitterly, no amusement or fun in your voice as you did.

"Do you think I can still have an ounce of respect for you after what you did? You murdered my people! They were all sorcerers. You killed students, Nanami! Jujutsu High's students! Just like Haibara once was!"

He shot his eyes at you, and the aura of his cursed energy grew sinister at your words. 

"Don't say his name."

Yu Haibara, arguably the glue that kept the trio together. You were hot headed, Nanami was intransigent, and Yu was the conciliatory ray of sunshine that kept you two — but you, particularly — from constant quarreling as classmates nearly every day.

But back then, you'd argue with Nanami with love.

This wasn't the case now.

Not entirely, at least.

"He was my best friend too, the three of us were! Do you really think this is what he would've wanted?!" you questioned him, equal parts hurt and enraged.

"I'm not one to ponder on could've or would've been's. Haibara is gone."

"I'm not a would've been!"

You could still remember it. The day you realized why dealing with Nanami and hearing his sharp comebacks riled you up so intensely. 

You finally understood you were in love with him.

Ever since the first day you met Nanami, you envied the way he'd be able to keep his feelings in check when you constantly felt like falling apart. You felt jealous at how he was considered a greatly competent individual, regarded by all as the best of your class, while you were basically viewed as a ticking bomb nearing explosion. And finally, it made you livid the way how everyone treated him like the informal leader of the trio when the three of you were out on a mission together.

However, those were the same things that got you to admire your friend and, eventually, fall in love for him.

That day, you asked Nanami to meet you outside after class by himself — much to Haibara's dismay —, because you had something to tell him. It was a Tuesday afternoon, and the unforgiving sun of summer was already setting, casting an orange glow through the leaves of the tree you were both under.

After confessing your feelings for him and bracing yourself for being shot down, because why the hell would Nanami Kento, the brilliant, competent, and mature second-year, have any interest in the chaotic, hot headed mess you were, you realized he actually looked surprised. After taking a few moments to collect himself, Nanami told you how he had thought you actually hated him.

At last, somewhat nervous — but definitely intent on not letting it show —, he confided he had affectionate feelings towards you as well.

Your first kiss was awkward, as it would be expected out of two inexperienced people such as you and Nanami were at that age, but it carried the sweet taste of a blue spring marked by teenage years' innocence.

It felt like a promise.

Unfortunately, such promise was unmercifully cut short the very next day, when Nanami and Haibara were dispatched to their life-changing mission.

What an irony it was that, in the end, you were the one to actually mature over Haibara's death, growing up to be an upstanding sorcerer, loved and admired by peers and students alike, and Nanami was the bomb to blow up in everybody's faces.

What a cruel irony.

"I was there too, and I'm still here, having to pick up the pieces of what you deliberately destroyed!" you rasped, angrily.

"You weren't a 'would've been'? Where were you when we needed you? When I needed you?" his voice didn't conceal the tinge of hurt that those questions carried.

What a fucking low blow.

"Nanami, that's not fair. There wasn't anything I could've done in that situation, and you know that!"

You blamed yourself for a while for not going on that mission with them, until you realized that you too would probably have died if you were there. From the three, Nanami was the only one strong and fast enough to pull off an escape like he did.

He diverted his gaze back to the window.

"You were the one to bring up hypothetical scenarios. Let's indulge in them for a minute, shall we?" 

Nanami glanced back at you, and his next words brimmed with bitter resentment, even if his voice sounded more calm and collected than ever.

"You see someone you supposedly love slowly sinking into darkness. What do you do?"

"Don't you dare, you condescending prick! I asked you so many fucking times what was going on. You were the one who shut me out!"

Your voice carried a decade-old pain that resonated from the depths of your soul.

It came from all the times you entered his dorm room with his favorite sandwich after he had cooped up in there for days on end, and he didn't even bother to eat it. Every time you asked him to talk to you, said you were there for him, and was met by a vacant stare.

And, at last, the time when he cruelly blamed you for not being there when Haibara died.

The way he coldly told you about Haibara's last words.

According to Nanami, Haibara said he wanted to speak to you one last time, at least to bid you farewell.

And you weren't there.

Oh, the viciousness with which he blamed you, and decided you owed him something for this perceived failure. 

The next time Nanami talked to you, he asked you to leave Jujutsu High with him, just like Geto did, and swore to destroy them. You tried, pleaded, implored for him to reconsider and stay, but the very following day, you were met by an empty room where the person you once loved used to be. 

That emptiness had, paradoxically, filled you wholly with grief.

Gojo once told you that nobody could save someone who didn't want to be saved.

You still thought you should've tried harder, in a childish attempt at giving yourself an illusory semblance of control over that clusterfuck of a situation.

This is the gap inside our psyche that feeling guilty tries to fill, isn't it?

We can only feel guilty about the things we could've changed, right?

Your voice sounded decades older than yourself, burdening the weight of multiple lifetimes of hurt and grief. Your soul was too old for your own good.

"How can you find it in yourself to blame me for this?! No… This is a prison of your own making. You built the house of cards that is tumbling down on your head as we speak entirely by yourself."

He huffed intensely through his nostrils — Nanami’s version of a snort —, looking the other way before proceeding, each syllable hitting you with the deadly precision of his cursed technique.

"You abandoned us, leaving me and Haibara to fend for ourselves, just like Jujutsu Society did."

By that point, you began yelling, and your voice reverberated all across the room.

"The hell I did!"

You had to take a deep breath before proceeding.

"I just couldn't get behind this dumb idea that we should become curse users and bring down Jujutsu Society."

"Why didn't you come with me?" he finally asked, in an amalgam of pain, sadness, longing, anger, and stinging resentment. "I would have followed you to the deepest recesses of hell if you asked me to."

You huffed, laughing angrily in between your teeth, before thrusting your words like thorns against him.

"Funny you should say that. You'd go anywhere for me? How about staying? Why couldn't you have stayed for me, then?!" 

Perhaps that request was egotistical, but you didn't care. If only for a moment, you wanted to give yourself this small privilege — to want in a world of duty.

"I was the one actually left to fend for myself, right inside the belly of the beast, and you couldn't have cared less."

He stared at you, nothing in his eyes other than the void left behind after his spirit got killed with his best friend so many years ago.

"I didn't stay because… Because," Nanami stated, with a grave finality, "and you're the one who chose to stay. You're still actively choosing to, just like you did back then."

"That's not a good enough answer," you replied with a bad taste in your mouth.

"It's what you've earned," he coldly replied, "but in case you change your mind-"

"Enough," you interrupted him, incredulous that even after everything, this man had the nerve of suggesting you'd ever be interested in running away with him. "It appalls me you would even consider I could… After what you've done? No, never."

Nanami sighed, and for a brief moment, seemed to be actually disappointed under his resigned, polished visage.

"Well, then. Let's get this over with, at once."

In a split second, you pushed your chair on the ground, falling on your shoulders and rolling on your back, dodging his lightning-fast attack. It left a crater behind, right where you were seconds before. Nanami jumped over the fallen armchair, and you dodged him once again, spinning on your heels, unsheathing your sword as you did so, to deal a beheading blow on the back of his neck.

However, right before impact, you faltered, slowing down your movement.

Your own body held you back from taking his life.

He didn't seem to notice.

Nanami bent down just in time to avoid the blow, and swung his blunt blade towards your kneecap. You were quick on your feet, and jumped back, putting a good distance between the both of you.

"I can see you're actually fighting to kill," he noted, getting up on his feet.

"Of course. That's what I came here to do," you spat in his direction.

"You were never the practical one."

You scoffed.

"Guess I learned something from you."

He smiled at the irony of that, but his eyes didn't follow his expression. 

Nanami lunged at you, but while you thought he'd deal his next blow in your direction, he hit your footing, having you fall on the ground. Abruptly, his blunt blade descended in your direction, but you were able to catch it and have it slip to your side using your katana supported by your hand behind it, sending a sharp, loud sound around the vicinity, trembling against the bones and flesh of the house.

You rolled on your side when he struck a new hit in your direction, leaving another gaping hole on the floor, and you jumped yourself up. 

Before you could attack him, however, he took you by surprise, and you lifted your sword to defend yourself. Nanami hit your katana with his blunt blade, breaking it near where the handle and the steel met, launching your body back on the wall.

The impact knocked the air out of your lungs, and you fell to your knees, unable to recover yourself as you got up. Instantly, you heard his quick, steady steps sprinting their way in your direction.

You were cornered.

This is it.

You braced yourself for the impact, closing your eyes. You remembered his technique perfectly.

Precise, just as he was.

Deadly, just as he was, too.

You were to die at the hands of the man you loved, who had become a murderer and only a distorted, broken version of whom you used to truly love.

This seemed like an oddly cruel way to go.

However, the impact never came.

His blunt blade stopped as it was about to hit your stomach, and you opened your eyes, just to see his face mere inches apart from yours. His mountainous form blocked your view from anything else behind him, and Nanami, at that moment, actually looked like the menace he truly was. 

“Why were you appointed as my executioner?” Nanami asked, much to your surprise.

“I asked to be,” you answered, holding his gaze as something went through his eyes. A hint of anger, most likely, and some sense of betrayal, certainly. 

“So, you want to kill someone you once loved? You were always prone to self-penitence, so it stands to reason you’d do something idiotic like that.”

You scoffed, grimacing at him, feeling your entire body incandescent with rage.

“I fucking hate you, Nanami.” 

He inched his face even closer, brushing your noses against one another, eyes stone-cold and hauntingly vacant.

“I hate you as well.”

For a moment, you wondered if he had really stopped his blade before impact. You didn't expect it, but hearing those words felt like you just had been hit, victim of a blunt trauma, at how much they tore you apart. 

The same blunt trauma that severed the Nanami you once knew — the teenager with bangs, who'd always be carrying around a few spare changes to get soda cans from the vending machine for you and Haibara, in his own understated kindness — and this empty monster looking back at you.

"Good. Finish me off, then, and get your revenge for a crime I never committed. Being unfair and an all-around self-centered asshole certainly suits you, fucker."

His hand made its way up your neck, and you were pressed against the wall. The grip was firm, but not enough to choke you — it came more as a warning than anything else.

"I already told you to stop using that foul language with me," he ordered, low voice simmering with genuine irritation.

"Then make me," you challenged him, hoping for this torture to be over as fast as possible.

Just fucking kill me already.

His blunt blade fell with a thud on the floor, and you were confused for a moment, wondering if he really wouldn't give you the kindness of a quick demise. Did he plan on choking you to death?

Did he hate you that much?

His other hand came up, but before you could do anything to try to resist — which would be nothing but a futile attempt at survival, given that Nanami was physically much stronger than you —, his fingers snaked their way through the back of your hair, tugging it at the roots. 

His mouth clashed against yours, all teeth, tongue, anger, and hunger, and instantly every nerve in your body flared up with a raging fiery ember you hadn't felt in years. All the pent-up resentment, hurt, and desire you had for Nanami swirled together in your gut, guiding your hands up his hair, as you also pulled on it intently, robbing him of a gasp.

You intertwined your tongue against his, and he unceremoniously bullied his own inside your mouth, leaving no crevice unexplored, as his hand on your neck descended towards your waist, where he clenched his fingers with a vicious grip. You whimpered against his lips, and he grunted in return, pushing his body on yours. His throbbing growing cock could be felt, even through both of your clothes, as he pressed it right against the edge of your pants.

When you finally parted after what seemed like a not-long-enough eternity, you huffed and panted, and albeit less than you, he was panting too.

"I fucking… hate you…" you gnarled, glaring into his eyes. The hazel-brown gaze you once adored was now clouded and dark, like the muddy waters of a deep lake.

"Shut the fuck up," Nanami groaned back, strongly cupping your cunt with his large hand. You whimpered in surprise, and he pulled you in harshly for another kiss, letting go of your hair and sex to sink his fingers on the backside of your thighs, pulling them. You immediately jumped up and threw your arms around his shoulders, as he manhandled your legs to have them hooked around him.

He quickly took you both inside the room, and tossed you on the bed, having you gasping in surprise. Before you could catch your breath, he climbed his way on top of you, pressing your body down, and clashed his mouth against yours again, making you actually lightheaded from a lack of air.

You pushed against his chest, grunting uneasy, and surprisingly, he parted his lips from yours.

"What?"

You panted heavily, nearly hyperventilating, and mindlessly rested your hand on his cheek.

"C-can't breathe…" was all you mustered up to say, trying to replenish oxygen back into your system.

His eyes softened so discreetly you nearly missed it, and his cold-ivory enclosure slightly cracked under the affectionate touch he didn't expect.

Nanami had no idea how much he had craved it ever since you parted ways, and hated himself, just a little, for how much such an innocuous gesture stirred his old feelings up, throwing his heart against his chest in a fluttering rush.

I should be over her by now, dammit.

Nanami also brought his hand up your face, and ghosted over your cheek for a second before sliding his fingers delicately down over it.

You also weren't prepared for that, and your chest tightened all over your heavy heart as you remembered your first kiss.

The way he'd cup your face in his hands.

 So delicate, so lovely.

This touch, at this very moment, felt like a painful reminder of everything you had lost.

"Kento…" you cooed, voice strained in your throat, with all the things you were sure you'd never say.

He hummed your name in return, and kissed you while sinking your body against the mattress. This kiss was different, as his lips brushed gently over yours, and his tongue tenderly teased over the seam of your mouth. You welcomed him in, and you both explored these deep waters tentatively, as he upped the intensity after each stroke of your tongues against each other.

He tasted like whiskey, and bread, and the tainted love left behind as nothing but a reminiscence of less grueling days. You couldn't help but feel robbed by him.

You both had been missing out on this for all these fucking years.

"Why did you have to go?" you asked, pulling back from him, a tinge of anger to your cadence, and another of pain in your face.

"Why did you have to stay?" he spat back at you, equal parts saddened and resentful.

His mouth made its way to your neck, and you gasped with the sensation of his warm breath mingled with saliva against your skin, as he licked and bit his way around.

You couldn’t find it in yourself to push him away, and your eyes burned with the prickling sensation of tears that wouldn’t come. You were starved for his touch, his smell, his body, even if this was the murderer of your students, of your friends.

In your head, you felt like digging a hole and throwing yourself in it, to wallow in the misery of realizing that you were about to fuck the murderer of people you loved, and that it felt good.

A pool of heat and fire shot down your insides as your heartbeats throbbed in between your legs.

You hated yourself, and on top of it all, hated Nanami. 

Hated that you couldn't help but still love him, even after all he had done.

This was the setting tension in between the both of you, the two extremes of hate and love pulling against each other, all while the tug of war rope refused to snap to either side.

He pulled your shirt over your head, tossing it aside, and you undid his shirt, unzipping his pants. He unzipped you too, and quickly enough, took off your pants along with your panties with a single sharp tug.

Back to rough, but not entirely, it seemed.

His hand glided against your thigh and his fingertips slipped over your entrance, getting completely glazed by your already dripping arousal. He grunted, a guttural and intense sound deep in his chest, giving you another bite on the soft skin of your neck.

"Hate me?" Nanami asked, teasing his digits over your cunt, "doesn't seem like it."

You managed to scoff at him, which would prove to be a mistake.

"Go fuck yours-"

Before you could finish your sentence, he dove two of his fingers inside knuckle-deep, without any hint of a warning, forcefully stretching your walls around them. You immediately let out a whimper so pitiful you wondered if that was really your voice.

He seemed satisfied at that. Perhaps, even elated.

"Good girl," Nanami whispered right beside your ear, nibbling against your earlobe with his teeth, sending shivers down your spine. He began sliding his fingers in and out, and you bucked down against his hand while moaning and mewling, walls sheathing his digits as he finger-fucked your cunt, neglecting your clit as punishment for calling him a condescending prick earlier.

His palm rucked against your dripping folds, echoing wet slaps all throughout the room, as your arousal kept pooling on his palm.

He mumbled softly against your skin, bringing his mouth up to brush against yours, "hate… you still love me."

You instantly drew one of your hands to slap him in the face for this hurtful teasing, but he had quick reflexes — quicker than yours. He dodged himself back as your hand hit the empty sheets, and edged his fingers to hit against your soft spot, pressing it so violently, you let out a strained cry from the shooting overstimulation pain.

"Ah- Shit!" you shouted, face all scrunched up.

"Can't you behave for once?" he chided, "why is it so hard for you to j-just-“ 

Nanami’s breath hitched in his throat as he grunted, unable to finish his sentence.

You shut him up the only way you could think — grabbing his cock harshly over his boxers. It was extremely effective, and he immediately humped his length against your hand, while lowly groaning.

With trembling hands and a violent snap, you haphazardly pulled his boxers down to his mid-thighs, as his fingers kept mercilessly bullying their way inside you, sending vibrating waves all throughout your body with every thrust.

“Stop… telling me… ah-aaah-“ you rolled your eyes back with a loud moan, struggling to keep a train of coherent thought, gnarling your next words,  “what to… ah- do!”

His cock sprang out, slapping against his belly. The tip was already flustered red, leaking with pre-cum, and had a long, prominent vein on the underside.

To punish him back for the roughness, you grabbed his length with one hand, and with the other, pressed the middle of your palm against his flushed tip, glistening his arousal around it with enough force to jump across the divide between intense pleasure and painful overstimulation.

Nanami cursed with a feral voice through his teeth, immediately biting the side muscles of your neck with no semblance of restraint, making sure to leave a purple remnant of pain etched on your skin.

“Ah- ouch! Fuck!” you spat out, tightening your grip around his cock, but weakened enough to release the tight pressure against his tip, letting him fuck into your hand. His hips bucked erratically, and his lips pressed a quick kiss right where he had previously bitten.

He couldn't help it.

Suddenly, Nanami stopped his rutting fingers to press his thumb against your already throbbing clit. That instantly had you seeing stars as you cursed loudly in between moans and grunts, drawing your free hand to his head, ferociously tugging at his hair, as heat pooled in your lower abdomen like fiery embers of coal.

He grabbed your arm, pulling it away from his shaft, and removed his fingers from your walls, having them clenching around nothing at such a sudden emptiness. You began complaining, only to have your voice cut short by his tongue slipping its way inside your mouth, in a sloppy, wet kiss. 

Parting from you, Nanami’s eyes were glassy, and you were absolutely sure your gaze must’ve looked just as hazy as his.

In a brief moment, before you realized it, he slid himself down, and unceremoniously lapped at your already sensitive clit with his warm tongue, hot breath tickling against your sensitive skin.

Both of your hands descended towards his hair, brushing over his golden and now messy locks more tenderly than you expected. Nanami suddenly shivered and moaned into your cunt, edging his tongue down your folds and back, eyes fluttering shut the moment he tasted you entirely.

He felt a tinge of pain clench at his chest, realizing this was the taste he had missed out on for all that time — your taste, which would surely ruin him forever.

Nanami’s pain, however, was quick to turn into outrage, as he began sucking on your clit relentlessly, eliciting the most animalistic sounds you had ever uttered.

You instinctively tried backing away, and he pulled on your thighs, holding them with such a violent force that his hand was sure to leave an engraving of his digits over your plush skin.

Nanami was intent on dragging this orgasm out of you by any means necessary.

You had never given him anything he wanted from you — be it the company to fight against Jujutsu High or the same unwavering loyalty he had for you. So this was something he’d take.

If you wouldn’t be by his side, then the least you could do was to cum for him so fervently, he’d be sure to ruin you just as much as he felt like you had ruined him. You owed him that, or so Nanami thought.

“Aaah-- Kento! S-slow d-… fuck!”

You came with a thunderous shout, jolting your hip forward as your thighs tightened with inhuman strength to the sides of his head. Nanami made sure to deliciously lick your way down from your high, applying such a precise and perfect pressure on your clit that you could’ve wept from sheer satisfaction.

After your legs went limp, he slowly climbed his way back to you, pressing kisses all over your body, leaving a ghost of heat wherever his mouth traveled. When Nanami finally reached your face, he put his forearms against your sides, hands over your shoulders, caging you in, as he pressed his mouth against yours in a slow kiss.

You were floating in a calm sea, salty waves caressing your body every time they passed through, and it felt cozy. Inviting, even. As he parted his lips from yours, Nanami gazed into your eyes in the way he used to.

For a second, you got catapulted into the past, and the orange sun that warmed your cheeks through the leaves as you kissed for the first time seemed to shine its rays over again.

With his arms around you, the nonsensical feeling of being protected washed over your heart.

“Come with me,” he whispered with a sultry, husky voice. 

“Kento…” you cooed, sighing, wanting nothing more than for this moment to extend for infinity.

But it couldn’t.

You didn’t go with him, so many years ago.

And wouldn’t go now, either.

That wasn’t how it worked for the both of you.

Nanami understood it, and what seemed like another crack against his unwavering walls had formed the moment his brows furrowed above his eyes.

“Fine, then,” he said, with a tinge of genuine hurt to his voice.

You parted your thighs to accommodate his hips, and he obliged, guiding his hand down to align his cock against your entrance. You bent and hooked your legs around him, pulling him in, and as the tip of his length got pressed against your dripping cunt, he gasped slightly over your lips.

Nanami sunk in slowly, going through your already relaxed ring. However, it apparently wasn’t relaxed enough, or perhaps he was just too big, because you could feel every inch of stretching his cock made against your walls as he slowly bottomed out inside your cunt.

His mouth fell open and you exhaled a moan into it, breaths mingling together. You two drank each other in. Nanami pressed his forehead against yours, and you both held each other’s gaze, as he pulled your left wrist above your head, holding it there, pushing you down the mattress by your waist with his other hand.

After a moment for you to take him in, Nanami began rolling his hips into you, while his hand kept bruisingly pressing your wrist against the mattress. You could feel his balancing act of trying to love you and wanting to hurt you at the same time.

You weren’t so different from him in that sense, though. Your nails got dragged down his back with abrasive force, and for a second, you considered drawing blood from him. He grunted, and you saw the spark of cold-hearted anger flash through his now dimmed eyes.

You both wanted to love each other just as much as you wanted to hurt each other.

In a more forgiving universe, perhaps, he’d hold your hand tenderly, intertwining his fingers in yours. Maybe you two would be in the kitchen as he showed you one of his favorite bread recipes, and share quiet moments of understanding companionship when remembering those who had left this world too soon.

But this wasn’t that universe, unfortunately.

He was to die, and you were to carry out his execution. 

Except you couldn’t, because even if you still tried to cling on to any sliver of morals, even if his life was something yours alone to take, the mere thought of a world without Nanami was far worse than the reality of a world in which he was a murderer.

You insisted on fighting a losing game, and much to no one’s surprise, you lost. 

Good riddance to me, I suppose.

His grunts came hitched and stuttered against your mouth as he was now rutting himself into you, biting your lower lip hard enough to almost pierce the skin with his teeth. You moaned loudly, dragged around with pain and pleasure, the combo that seemed to summarize the gist of your relationship.

He let go of your wrist and descended his hand without a warning towards your already overworked clit, glazing his thumb against the ring of arousal you were leaving around him before starting to make circles around your nub. Your moans came out cracked and faltering, as you tried to resist the instinctive urge of fleeing that the overstimulation was eliciting.

“Give me… one more,” Nanami groaned lowly against your cheek, planting multiple kisses down the side of your face and your chin. His hair — which had already fallen from its usual slick arrangement — brushed against your fluttering eyelids, momentarily weaving golden sand colors over your your vision, and you drove both your hands to the back of his head, pulling him in for another kiss. 

You could kiss him like this forever. 

You actually wanted to, at that moment.

To his request, you nodded, and this was probably the first time you acquiesced to any request Nanami had ever made to you. 

Fulfilled, his thrusts and his finger over your clit became increasingly erratic, as he was now moaning your name against your mouth. You pushed your tongue over his, sliding your hands up his head to tug at his roots, and that was all it took to tip him over the edge.

Nanami came with a muffled groan, having your tongue still pushed inside his mouth, and kept pumping himself inside you trying to keep the comedown at bay. His thick, white cum got glazed all over inside you, and the slaps of flesh and skin began sounding ever more wet than they already were.

You weren’t so far off, with your walls fluttering around him, and he noticed it, keeping his now trembling thumb pressed and circling intently over your clit. With one perfectly applied nudge on your sensitive bud, Nanami finally pulled you over the edge along with him.

Some tears began pooling on the edges of your lashes, and all your emotions — anger, sadness, grief, longing, and a particular brand of despair you cultivated during the last decade — came crashing down as he wrenched your second orgasm from you.

Your body convulsed under him, fluttering walls expelling his softening cock out, as you shouted and grunted into his mouth. You didn’t know if you were more furious at yourself for still loving him, at him for loving you, or at Jujutsu Society for jumbling you both like pawns to be tossed around until you two were broken beyond repair.

Angry at them for sending the young out to have their spirits crushed too soon. For all the deaths no one got to mourn because there was too much work, too little time, and the wounded were always left behind to fend for themselves.

Just like you were.

And just like Nanami was.

You sat at the edge of the bed while putting your shirt back on, and looked back at Nanami, who had his buttoned shirt open over his chest.

“Are you still resolute on your decision of not coming with me?” Nanami asked, with a tinge of eagerness. Or maybe it was just your imagination.

You pondered for a moment, and knew exactly what the answer to that question was.

“Yes. I’m not coming with you.”

For a second, you caught the faintest glimpse of the person he used to be. Something aching to genuine disappointment.

The longing that flashed through him, unfortunately, was quick to go, as he began buttoning his shirt down, averting his gaze elsewhere.

“Why?”

“Because I’d hate myself for the rest of my life if I did,” you stated, sighing before continuing, “and it’s not because I can’t kill you or because I love you that I don’t despise you. You crossed an uncrossable line.”

He pursed his lips, and almost felt regretful for the path he chose.

Almost, since regret now would come ten years too late.

“You can’t go back. They will know you let me go,” Nanami remarked. Be it from him or from looking around this house, Jujutsu High would surely hold you accountable for this — for willingly letting the curse user and murderer, Nanami Kento, escape their wrath.

“I know that,” you replied, a tad bit more defeated than you expected, “that’s why I’m fleeing to Hokkaido.”

He sighed and looked at you. You held his gaze, feeling a little hint of anxiety at what he seemed to be simmering under the surface.

With a warmer expression — or as warm as he could muster it up to be  —, Nanami spoke again. 

“I truly want you to come with me. You’d be safer. We’d… be by each other’s side.”

For a moment, you faltered, open lips with no sound coming out of them. Blinking yourself back to Earth, you asked, “you mean together?”

Nanami kept silent, but nodded, waiting for your response.

He wasn’t just asking for you to come with him, but to be with him.

You wanted to. You did. Something Nanami never knew was just how much you wanted to follow him when he asked you the same thing, so many years ago.

But even though you wholeheartedly loved him with every minute part of your being, your loyalty lied elsewhere.

Not with him, but with the people he had killed.

Well, at least that was the comfortable lie you were capable of living with.

It would destroy you to realize the loyalty you had for the murderer of the people you loved. 

In the end, even if you weren’t a teenager anymore, you were just as much a hostage to your feelings as you had always been.

The ticking took a long time, but the bomb eventually went off.

With a decade’s old delay.

“I… just can’t. I can’t.”

Nanami reclined himself against the wall over which the bed rested, closing his eyes as he supported the back of his head on it. 

He never told you, but this moment broke his heart all over again.

He felt pathetically small.

Guess we get what we deserve, after all.

“You really do have a taste for penitence,” Nanami noted, his voice barely concealing the bitterness that tainted those words.

You scoffed, getting up on your feet, ready to leave as the first rays of sunshine began bleeding through the thick curtains that covered the bedroom’s window.

“Go to hell.”

He chuckled, a sound you hadn’t heard in a very long time. However, it sounded off-key. Wrong.

Sad.

“We’re already here.” 

At the end of it all, he wasn’t wrong.

You were doomed to always keep leaving each other.

If only the world had been a little kinder.

But kindness, it seemed, wasn’t in the cards for you.

End notes: I’m silently screaming. Oh my, this one took way longer than expected, but I enjoyed the writing process during every step of the way (I mean, if that wasn’t evident already from the fact that I made a playlist for this 😂). I forgot how much I was a sucker for gut wrenching angst. Hope you enjoyed it too! 🦉

-

Tag list: @actuallysaiyan @diogodxlot @jadedjane @redlikerozez @voiceless9000

@marvelousfanfictionbitch @kentocalls @ohhheymessa @magical-girl-b @simp-manhwa

@codenamesongbird

[ghostlyferrettarot]

🖤🌗Lilith in the Signs🌓🖤

❗️All the observations in this post are based on personal experience and research, it's completely fine if it doesn't resonate with everyone❗️

✨️Paid Services ✨️ (Natal charts and tarot readings) Open.

🖤If you like my work you can support me through Ko-fi. Thank you!🖤

🌟Masterlist🌟

🐈‍⬛Lilith in Aries: the native may feel more of a desire to be independent, to stand up for things he believes in, to cherish individualism, to argue persuasively for his opinions, and to be more sensual and straightforward when in love. The issue is that this can make relationships a little more challenging, encouraging more rejection or the tendency to look for flaws in a spouse since it's hard to commit. Those who were born with this alignment in their birth chart might have gone through periods of rejection.If Lilith is in Aries, don't be scared to look ahead; what vibrates will remain, and if not, don't be afraid to let it go for good.

🐈‍⬛Lilith in Taurus: Lilit in Taurus indicates a stronger sense of tenacity along with an increased attraction to all things sensual and lovely. Additionally, it may increase emotional activity to the point that you look for greater security in relationships. Furthermore, this comfort isn't necessarily purely emotional; you might want to look for individuals who are stable financially, for instance. This particular dependency on tangible, safe things might occasionally cause discomfort and disrupt your emotional balance. Lilith, who stands for feminine power, narrates how the family's ladies acquired strength and empowerment so Lilith is in Taurus could be a clan women who came to power by making excellent use of their resources and handling their finances and belongings with diligence.

🐈‍⬛Lilith in Gemini: It can induce a greater search for independence and make the native particularly interested in intellectual or communicative areas, such as literature and public relations. This position can also suppress emotions a little or make the native more rational. With this placement it is important to understand that what kills or what hurts the native is not the physical offense, but the negative use of other people's words. With Lilith in Gemini this people may be afraid to connect with their environment for fear of rejection Or it could be the opposite, someone who is very good at social communication, who is friendly and fun and connects with everyone.

🐈‍⬛Lilith in Cancer: Lilith in Cancer has a great capacity to intuit emotionally charged issues, perhaps about the past, childhood, lack of protection during childhood, or during a moment of great vulnerability. She encourages the native to reflect on the concepts of family. This movement also speaks of emotions that are gestated in the primordial energy of Creation. The desire to establish emotional ties is intense and these people may obsessively seek to start a family.

🐈‍⬛Lilith in Leo: In general, it brings a greater desire to have fun, increases the desire to participate in parties and perhaps be the center of attention. It increases the chance of convincing and seducing people and slightly increases the chances of being a notable person. Self-knowledge is very important for you to find your true identity and eliminate any type of narcissism and overvaluation of your shape or physical beauty. When seeking recognition and attention, you must be careful not to do so in an exaggerated way. Lilith in Leo represents the energetic vibration of rebellion, uniqueness and creativity. This energy has the quality of helping those with this position.

🐈‍⬛Lilith in Virgo: They have a character that is not afraid of loneliness, they are independent and do not sacrifice their autonomy for some company. They are very selective with their friends and partners and do not dedicate time to the bonds that do not find meaning in the shared moments. This positioning of Lilit can make objectivity in details a little difficult, influencing the native to criticize things or people at first glance. Her analytical and psychological abilities tend to increase and they may have very strong intuition. The problem is that they may not be exactly aware of these abilities or, out of modesty, may not admit them.

🐈‍⬛Lilith in Libra: Lilith in Libra can intensify the thirst for justice, this position indicates a constant search for equality and beauty and at the same time a great need for symmetry in relationships. The challenge of this displacement is that natives often face scenarios where independence is threatened. with Lilith in Libra you may have difficulty establishing healthy boundaries in your social connections. This is because Lilith represents our darkest side.

🐈‍⬛Lilith in Scorpio: Lilith in Scorpio can generate a tendency towards self-destruction or an overwhelming need to go against what is established. People born under this sign have an intense and magnetic energy that can attract others to them. In addition, they are very passionate and deep people, which allows them to connect with their darkest part and have the ability to face fears and internal traumas. In addition, it can speak of people with a strong and defiant character who do not follow conventional social norms. People with this position may be curious about issues associated with sexuality, power, and individual and social transformation.

🐈‍⬛Lilith in Sagittarius: Here this native has the opportunity to unite intellect and spirituality, in addition, he suggests an influence that gives rise to a greater desire for knowledge and adventure. He usually contacts other people in search of more experience, always with good intentions. Also, he can talk about detached people, who feel that they cannot dedicate themselves to a single person, who need to adventure, travel and discover other cultures. This individuals must be careful from those who try to take advantage of their generosity as well as they must avoid nurturing vices.

🐈‍⬛Lilith in Capricorn: It tends to slightly intensify the desire for status or to obtain a prominent position, it induces the native to be a little more indifferent or demanding with others, but sometimes it is important to make concessions. On the other hand, it can increase the sense of discipline and duty, basic things to achieve a prestigious position. It is important to keep in mind that those born with Lilith in this Earth sign can express themselves in a harsh way emotionally, and their own limitation makes it difficult to expression of others. They treat the people they love with somewhat authoritarian dynamics and expect them to respond in a certain way.

🐈‍⬛Lilith in Aquarius: Lilith in Aquarius can intensify intuition, the desire for adventure, and a bolder attitude. She can stimulate independence or rebellion. Lilith in this Air sign, by not respecting what is established, they can adopt a permanent attitude of being contrary and testing everything around her. Their biggest urge is to cut ties and be totally autonomous, which can cause discomfort with others. These natives may feel that they do not match their family, they feel like the black sheep or the oddball of the clan. Then, they leave the blood network in search of a group to which they belong.

🐈‍⬛Lilith in Pisces: This positioning can cause the person to intensify themes, such as imagination, fantasy, artistic sense and inspiration. It may also stimulate a greater inclination to help people or an appreciation for social work. However, such influence can cause one to neglect oneself and fail to meet one's own needs. You must be careful not to get caught in illusions. Your spirituality or creative imagination can bear good material fruits, and it is necessary to deepen your knowledge and self-knowledge to unlock good ideas. You should always think about how to develop your spirituality and intuition to get a good idea of everything that happens around you.

[elysiansparadise]

Vesta: Your inner flame

⚶ Vesta asteroid [4] can show our talents, abilities and in which area of ​​our life we ​​should focus our energy or in which we usually focus our energy. Commitment and dedication, as well as the area of ​​life or the aspects in which we focus our entire being. It is the area of ​​your life in which you are willing to make sacrifices no matter what, in order to achieve the goal. In this post I will talk a little about the attributed talents. By sign I will speak of the way in which we do what we are most passionate about. By house, the area of ​​our life in which we focus the most. ⚶

🟤Vesta in Aries: They are very passionate and active people who put all their energy when they have an idea in mind. The idea can arise spontaneously and as soon as they have it they can put it into action. They dislike doing things with a set routine and prefer to act creatively and figure things out on the go. They make their ideas actions and it bothers them to feel that they are only daydreaming about something instead of doing something. They may have a talent for a particular sport/physical activity, motivating themselves and others, and leadership. People with this placement are very focused once something captures their attention and they are quick to carry out an activity that they like. These natives dislike that others want to control how they do things or what they do, they stand out for their independence when it comes to carrying out a project of any kind.

🟫Vesta in 1st house: They are people who are very focused on learning more about themselves, getting to know each other from head to toe, and having a clear idea of ​​who they are. They are true to themselves, they seek to stay productive and do what they want without caring much what others say. They put their energy in themselves, have a clear self-concept defined and they enter the journey towards that search for their true identity. They may have a talent for leadership, the ability to charisma, can help others find themselves and follow their own path and heart. They are focused on achieving independence, expressing themselves in an uninhibited way, and distancing themselves from the opinion or expectations of others.

🟤Vesta in Taurus: They are people who take their time to do things, they find it difficult to focus at first, but once they do, they are persevering, constant and determined to complete that activity or task. For them, achieving security, stability and comfort is the goal. They may have skills and talents for activities that require concentration and the use of their hands, such as drawing, crafts, pottery, painting, or playing an instrument. It usually takes some time before they decide to start bringing an idea to life, for fear that they won't be able to do their idea as they have it. Working on things they like makes them feel better about themselves, and when they finish something satisfactorily they feel a boost in their self-esteem. They may have a talent for handling money, for some art or as I mentioned previously, in an activity that has to do with the hands.

🟫Vesta in 2nd house: Some of the talents they may have are singing, for organization, investing [or for business related topics] and looking for creative ways to earn money. They are people who work daily on their self-esteem and know that hard work will lead them to have the economic stability they desire. They stand out for their loyalty and for that way of, even without realizing it, giving a lot of security to those they love. They do not go into projects, jobs or work on ideas that they know have no purpose, they like the tangible and the real. They protect what they have worked hard to achieve and are very focused on improving what they already have. They like to know that they have a safe place and always seek to do what makes them feel happy and more complete.

🟤Vesta in Gemini: They can have multiple ideas at the same time, their mental energy is high and they tend to be very productive and restless intellectually. They prefer to use their reason over their hearts when it comes to making an important decision, as they can be very objective. They are great communicators and highly capable, have a unique ability to verbalize their ideas, are resourceful, creative, and perform wonderfully when it comes to teamwork. They do not have a defined style of work, they can alternate between being spontaneous or organized. They may have many interests in mind, making it difficult for them to stick with one in particular. Multi-talented, they may have skills in many different fields. Great ability to connect people. They can get a lot of happiness if they make their hobby a job or vice versa. Talented writers or speakers.

🟫Vesta in 3rd house: Passionate about learning, they love learning about new ideas and concepts and are easy to understand. Great talents to learn new things quickly, talent for writing, public speaking and everything that involves communicating effectively. Their mind is restless, but that allows them to be able to focus on many things at once, that is, they run the risk of being easily distracted. They can be socially skilled, but they need some alone time afterwards, their alone time is something they enjoy doing many different activities. They can be passionate about reading and they can always have something to read on hand [books, notes, or internet articles]. They can help others by contributing unique ideas, as they are very creative.

🟤Vesta in Cancer: They tend to put their whole heart when it comes to doing something they are passionate about, they are tenacious and get a lot of emotional comfort when they do what they love the most. Their hobbies can be their safe place and can bring them a lot of satisfaction. They may have a talent for psychology, cooking and some arts, as they capture emotions in a satisfactory way. They take their emotions and those of others very seriously, plus they have a very special way of understanding other people's needs with ease. They highly value their space and may feel more comfortable and more creative when alone. Some of them can see their performance affected when they are not emotionally well, they can even take a break, because they want to be one hundred to dedicate themselves consciously and totally. They deeply care about the well-being of those they love.

🟫Vesta in 4th house: Their family is very important to them, and not necessarily the biological one, but the people they consider family (friends for example), they are very devoted to people who feel a very strong emotional bond. It is important for them to understand their own emotions and the emotions of those they love. They spend a lot of time doing activities that make their inner child feel happy, perhaps doing things they enjoyed doing as children or eating things that remind them of their childhood. They are very protective people with children or people they perceive as vulnerable. They may have a talent for making others feel comfortable and happy, dealing with children, cooking, or writing. They focus on healing their inner child.

🟤Vesta in Leo: These natives are highly creative and very spontaneous when it comes to getting going when doing something. The gratitude of others upon noticing the native's good deeds can greatly motivate them, they can get annoyed if they feel that others don’t appreciate them, their efforts or if others don’t give as much energy in the matter / work / relationship as them. They will always look for the key to happiness and they will do many activities to feel happy. They put a lot of energy into feeling satisfied with themselves and with what they do. They feel the need to do things their way and although authority doesn't bother them, it is more that they need to feel that they can express themselves through doing what they are passionate about. This placement can give charisma and the power to stand out doing what the person is most passionate about.

🟫Vesta in 5th house: These people put their all into it when it comes to their hobbies, they may excel at more than one activity and have many artistic interests. Usually seen as multi-talented, passionate, as well as very good at whatever it is they do. To be efficient and work excellently, it is necessary for them to really enjoy what they are doing, so it is recommended that they look for jobs or study things that they are really passionate about. In case they decide to be parents, they will be excellent and they will put all their attention and care in seeing their children grow and love unconditionally.  Very devoted people in love and at first they can be somewhat shy/it can be difficult for them to open up, but they can be very understanding lovers and willing to support their partner.

🟤Vesta in Virgo: Regardless of other traits of their personality, if they are really interested in or passionate about something, they can be very perfectionists and demanding of themselves, they will always want to give their best in everything related to what they are passionate about. They will seek to be the best version of themselves and feel competent to perform whatever they like. Despite this and how independent they may seem, they will not hesitate to lend a hand if the other needs it. They give themselves body and soul to causes they feel worthwhile and like to feel useful and productive. This is a very productive placement of Vesta, as it feels comfortable in this sign. They prefer to work in a quiet place, in order and efficiently, noise or very chaotic environments can stress them out. They are capable of giving absolutely everything if the situation requires it. Silently passionate.

🟫Vesta in 6th house: They like to be there for others and support them. They probably have a job that they are truly passionate about or at the very least, it is important for them to work on something that they genuinely love. They may have a gift for understanding and caring for animals and may like them very much. Talent for design, organization, healing and understanding of complex ideas. It's crucial for them to do a great job, otherwise they don't feel good about themselves. They take great care of their body and their health, for them there is nothing more important than their emotional and physical well-being. They are very detailed when it comes to doing something, they put a lot of time and effort.

🟤Vesta in Libra: It is necessary for them to function in places with harmony and peace, tense and angry environments can make them nervous and deteriorate their performance. They actively work to have an internal balance and seek to find that middle ground between channeling their energy into themselves and others. They are people with a talent for relating to different types of people, a talent for any branch of art and for giving beauty to anything. They take their relationships seriously, are highly committed, and expect that same level of devotion from the other person. They may prefer to work together or make their work space aesthetically pleasing, for example, by decorating their surroundings. They are passionate, but they do not go out of their way or work more than is considered healthy for them, they prioritize their well-being and comfort. Perceived as elegant without trying.

🟫Vesta in 7th house: They have a great ability to understand the other very well, great diplomacy, charisma and talents to mediate any type of situation. They are somewhat selective with whom they leave within their closest circle, but they like to give their all in their relationships of any kind, especially those in which they see themselves in the long term. They work to maintain harmony and make both the other person and themselves feel comfortable in the relationship. If problems arise, they will seek to resolve them effectively. They do a lot of introspection and are able to see all sides of themselves even if it might be difficult. It is important for natives to create a balance between what they give and what they receive.

🟤Vesta in Scorpio: They give their all when they are passionate about something, giving 200% in everything they consider important. They are private when they have plans, projects or passions and they only confide them with people they really trust. They may prefer to undertake ideas or projects on their own, especially if they are very personal or significant to them. One of the most loyal placements of Vesta, they respect privacy and constantly care for their relationships. Passionate, they immerse themselves in their passions, falling into the risk of distancing themselves from other issues in their lives or not giving them the indicated attention. Talent for spiritual matters, especially healing people or for the tarot. Highly developed intuition. Much wisdom. They are very sexual people who are not afraid of touching topics of this nature, intense and attentive lovers.

🟫Vesta in 8th house: They are fascinated by topics that others do not dare to touch or explore, mysteries can attract a lot of attention. Criminology, psychology, occultism, spirituality or sexology. They possess great curiosity and may not rest until they know the truth. These people consciously or subconsciously seek emotional intensity. As for sex, they tend to seek a deeper connection with their partners and enjoy the idea of ​​knowing and stimulating every corner of their beloved's body. They may have a more spiritual vision of death, believe in reincarnation or beliefs of that nature. They are aware that death is something we will all go through, so they may have the idea of ​​wanting to enjoy themselves without inhibition.

🟤Vesta in Sagittarius: It is easy for them to feel motivated to start a project, do what they are passionate about or make their ideas a reality, the complicated thing can be to finish the action. They are very enthusiastic and creative people when it comes to doing what they like, no matter how serious they are in their day to day, you will see that sparkle in their eyes when they talk about what they like or when they do their favorite activity. They focus on acquiring more knowledge, more wisdom, on their dreams and ideas and on enjoying life. They may have a talent for learning new languages, generally for learning many things quickly, for teaching and for motivating people. They are people very devoted to their ideologies and with a strong sense of what is right. They enjoy learning about and experiencing new things and stand out for being open minded.

🟫Vesta in 9th house: Many of these natives feel a desire and an itch to learn about the complex issues of life, to see beyond what the school or their parents may have told them, to search for a deeper meaning or a reason for what happens to them. around. They may have skills in the humanities, learning new languages, debating, and teaching others. They may have an interest in the law and may fall under the label of a knowledgeable and curious person. They love all those activities that allow them to continue acquiring knowledge. They may love to travel or experience different cultures. They like to continue acquiring wisdom and spirituality can be very important to them, they will be very devoted to their beliefs.

🟤Vesta in Capricorn: It is crucial for these natives to be in a calm environment to feel completely comfortable, ironically they project to others the ability to work efficiently regardless of the chaos of the place. They are very constant and if they consider that something can augur something stable and f they see a purpose, they will give absolutely everything. Another Vesta placement commonly attributed to loyalty. These people are very hard workers, if you have a lot of tense aspects, especially Moon or Saturn, they don't let their emotional upset get in the way and can suppress their emotions in order to do what they have to do. Talents for organization, planning, strategy, they have a privileged analytical mind. They resist temptations easily, have great abilities to concentrate and to make people under their charge complete a task successfully. They give stability to others.

🟫Vesta in 10th house: For these people it is crucial to do something to get what they want, they like to feel productive and have a rational approach to their passions. They believe in hard work, especially if they are looking for a reward. They put a lot of their energy into things that can be useful to them in the long term, they like to play it safe and fight for things or people that are really worthwhile for them, because they don't waste their time or energy. High chances of working on something they really like. They can help many people through their work, or throughout life they can help many even without realizing it. Skills to bring comfort to people, leadership and to organize and put order in any chaos.

🟤Vesta in Aquarius: They like the idea of ​​doing things their own way and are often drawn to activities that allow them to express themselves freely and at the same time do not make them feel as pressured. They can work just as well in a team as on their own, but may prefer to do things independently. They may have a talent for astrology, branches of science, or anything related to the humanities. They tend to do things with their own rules and do not like to follow a scheme, a plan or an order, as there is a tendency to get carried away when it comes to following a passion. They may have writing, computer, or digital art skills. They have this spark that allows them to unite people, they have a certain social charm. They are always willing to help others, and although they are not quick to trust, their friendly and charming personality makes them make favorable impressions on others.

🟫Vesta in 11th house: They are people with many aspirations and long-term goals, they actively work on them. They stand out for their creativity and ability to come out with innovative and intriguing ideas. Friendship is something that they value with all their soul and they will always try to be there for who their friends are, they can play the role of counselor and they will have an attentive and caring personality towards them. They are very compassionate with people and they like to unconditionally support causes that need it, they can give them a lot of support through social networks or by spreading the word. They may spend a lot of time on the internet and may have hobbies or a job that allows them to connect with many through it.

🟤Vesta in Pisces: These natives can lose track of time and what is happening around them, because they immerse themselves entirely in topics that they are really passionate about, they put their soul, all their attention and all their emotions into it. Actively seek to make the world a better place. They empathize with others and love the idea of ​​helping others overcome difficult situations. They devote themselves to the task of supporting those they consider vulnerable or offering their support and understanding to those who love. A remarkable talent for art and spirituality, it is difficult for them to express their emotions but they do so in a remarkable way through these media. Easy to connect with the emotions and psyche of other people. Unique ability to heal the discomfort or sadness of others, great listeners and excellent counselors. Focus a lot on dreams and have a rich imagination.

🟫Vesta in 12th house: They are passionate about what is not easily perceptible by others, what goes beyond, what each person keeps in their heart, spirituality, the deep meanings of life, art or music they listen to, the root of social problems and their own emotional problems. Major healing placement of Vesta, a comforting person who knows how to understand and guide people. Great wisdom, altruistic and sensitive to their peers. They work hard when it comes to their dreams, they are very creative people with an interesting inner world and a mind full of complex and fascinating ideas. Interest in introspection and a need to constantly analyze their past and the things that have happened in order to understand themselves better.

🟫Vesta aspecting the Sun: These people are very devoted to things they are passionate about, have a loyal personality, and are very reliable and trustworthy. For them it is important to work on themselves, be it improving themselves, getting to know themselves better or developing their individuality. They may seem shy or focused on their own matters at first, as they don't really mind being on their own. They are very creative people and can tend to put a bit of themselves, a piece of their soul into everything they do. 

🟫Vesta aspecting the Moon: These people need good environments, harmony both in their surroundings and emotionally to be able to concentrate. Emotions can direct the outcome of their actions and level their productivity. Unique way of understanding both their own emotions and those of others. These aspects show us someone who is very devoted, loyal and attentive to their personal relationships. Constant and balanced emotional world.

🟫Vesta aspecting Mercury: These aspects give a brilliant mind, full of ideas and always seems to be active, sometimes too much. They love to share their ideas with others and that others do the same. These people become very devoted to learning, either always trying to be good students or keep learning about various subjects that interest them. Tense aspects may indicate that the native is easily distracted. 

🟫Vesta aspecting Venus: They can have many artistic talents, a lot of charisma when it comes to relating to others and even skills in managing finances. Honesty and transparency are crucial for them in a relationship. Very loyal in their relationships and always work to make them better. Tense aspects can cause the native to alternate between wanting a relationship and not wanting it, so they think better if they open up to having a relationship. They respect their space and their partner’s without forgetting to seek the relationship.

🟫Vesta aspecting Mars: They have excellent abilities to focus their energy in a healthy and constant way on their goals or actions, they are very energetic when it comes to doing things they like. Sex for them is important, but it isn’t something they feel they can have with just anyone, because they want it to mean something deeper for them. They may work hard or keep busy to cope with inner tension or anger. Very good at working under pressure.

🟫Vesta aspecting Jupiter: They possess much inner wisdom and have a natural attraction to the complex and spiritual issues of life. They can be very lucky if they decide to work on things related to their passions. Talent to learn languages ​​and easy to connect with people from other cultures. Very devoted people to the idea of ​​always doing the right thing, fair and considerate of people. Good karma may come quickly to them.

🟫Vesta aspecting Saturn: They are very persevering, constant and responsible people once they commit to something or someone. They can be very perfectionists with themselves, because they want to do their best and be the best version of themselves. They may take time to do things, but the results promise to be very good. May have a hard time starting some things for fear of not being prepared or not having enough skill or knowledge.

🟫Vesta aspecting Uranus: Need to put their own touch on everything they are passionate about, may prefer to work independently and feel inspired suddenly and when they least expect it. Difficulty concentrating on just one subject, tendency to multitask and be easily distracted. May procrastinate, especially with hard aspects. Difficulty focusing on day to day activities. They do not like to be ordinary, nor the routine.

🟫Vesta aspecting Neptune: They tend to be artistic people with a lot of potential in this area, in the same way they can have a great spiritual world and be very devoted to their beliefs. They are people with a lot of compassion who believe that by contributing their grain of sand they can help improve the world. They have high emotional intelligence and easily understand others. They put a piece of their soul into everything they do.

🟫Vesta aspecting Pluto: They keep their passions private, but feel more joy and satisfaction when they put one of them into practice. They have a lot of inner power, they can influence, change or transform others/their minds through doing what they are passionate about. Very sexual despite the impression they may give, sex is a memorable experience with them. May have an interest in the occult, mysteries, astrology, tarot or similar topics.

🟫Vesta aspecting Rising: With a loyal, constant and productive personality, they always seem to be on the go or with something in progress. They are passionate about the idea of ​​knowing themselves more and more, they can seek to know everything about themselves and have a realistic and positive self-concept. Independence is something crucial for them, they need their space. They have a strong sense of identity, not easily influenced.

🟫Vesta aspecting Midheaven: They can be seen as very reserved people, there is a touch of purity mixed with confidence and certainty of where they want to go. They give the impression of being very productive and professional. They give their all when it comes to their career, they are hard workers and can make a job out of their passion. They are very productive and prefer to believe in making their own miracles happen.

🟫Vesta aspecting North Node: They live in the constant search for their life purpose, this may be linked to work or dedicate themselves to what they are most passionate about, either professionally or as a hobby. Their mission in life is related to forming a hard-working, devoted personality. They can achieve great things doing what they are passionate about. Helping others also seems to be an important issue in their soul development.

[spirit-of-phantom]

URANUS AND HOW YOU EVOKE CHANGE

uranus, the planet of innovation and disruption, invokes change through sudden breakthroughs, unconventional thinking, and radical shifts that challenge existing norms, inspiring progress and revolution in various spheres of life. its influence prompts unexpected awakenings, urging societies and individuals alike to embrace originality, break free from conventions, and embrace forward-thinking approaches to create groundbreaking transformations.

aries / 1H: sparks ideas of self image and identity, promotes individuality and independence in personal matters, sudden and bold changes on how one presents themselves to the world

taurus / 2H: disrupts traditional values and financial systems, innovation in material and personal resources, challenges stability and security regarding one’s own worth and values

gemini / 3H: intellectual breakthroughs and communication within immediate surroundings, need for adaptable thinking in everyday interactions, changes in local community dynamics, education, and siblings

cancer / 4H: disrupts traditional family structures and the concept of home and roots, seeks progressive approaches to domestic life and emotional security, changes in the family environment and inner emotional foundations

leo / 5H: innovations in creativity, entertainment, and self-expression on a personal level, encourages unconventional approaches to hobbies, romance, and children, challenges traditional notions of ego and individuality in personal pursuits

virgo / 6H: stimulates advancements in health, work routines, and service to others, encourages unconventional methods in daily habits and workplace dynamics, provokes changes in technology related to personal wellness and efficiency

libra / 7H: disrupts traditional relationships and partnerships in a one-on-one context, emphasizes the need for fairness and justice in personal interactions, changes in personal unions, contracts, and open enemies

scorpio / 8H: transformative changes in shared resources, intimacy, and psychological depths, innovations in joint finances, sexuality, and occult matters, challenges traditional views on the use of power in personal transformation

sagittarius / 9H: stimulates unconventional ideas in higher education, travel, and personal beliefs, emphasizes the need for freedom and exploration of personal philosophies, changes in personal journeys, spirituality, and worldviews

capricorn / 10H: disrupts traditional structures in career, public reputation, and authority figures, encourages innovations in long-term goals and aspirations, challenges traditional values regarding personal ambitions and societal roles

aquarius / 11H: reinforces its own energy as uranus rules aquarius, encourages radical social changes and humanitarian efforts within personal networks, sparks innovations in personal connections, technology, and communal involvement

pisces / 12H: stimulates imaginative and spiritual breakthroughs in personal realms, encourages unconventional ways of compassion and empathy on an individual level, changes in personal introspection, artistic expressions, and dreams

© spirit-of-phantom 2023

[vixeneptune]

Secret to being SUPER MAGNETIC 🌹

1. Be present

Be present in your body and in the moment. This moment rn is all that rly exists, be in the NOW and cherish your time.

2. Be grounded

Being grounded makes you more centered and naturally charismatic and attractive, that ties with being present. Become grounded in who you are, you gotta grow strong roots in your self trust and self love that NOTHING can shake you.

3. Be sensual

Being sensual opens up your sacral chakra which is the energy center in your body responsible for attraction and personal magnetism. Feel your body, embrace it, give it love. (It doesn't have to be sexual, Sensuality is more about connecting with your senses)

4. Be open

If you wanna be magnetic you gotta be open to RECEIVE. that means , open body language, open mind, open heart.

5. Be whole & complete

You're not this body, you're not these thoughts, you're not even your identity, you are consciousness , you are everything. Everything is already within you and you can tap into it anytime. You are whole and complete already, you don't lack anything and you dont NEED anything.

6. Be abundant

When you know you already have it all, you start having this abundant mindset. There are so many options, so many possibilities, so much love,money,opportunities all around you!

7. Focus on yourself

Don't be distorting your energy here and there, obsessing over that person or worrying about things outside of you too much. Remember ALWAYS go back to your self concept, focus on you. Who you are really in your core and how powerful you are. Circumstances don't matter, other ppl opinions don't matter, what others are doing don't matter, let them be. You are the main character

8. Center yourself

Centering yourself = bring grounded + present + secure. Being calm and collected. At peace with yourself

9. Inner security

This is so important. Inner security births true confidence, its not coming from a place of ego but a place of love, of knowing your worth and value. Not seeking anyone's attention/approval/validation.

10. Detach

Let go of needing anything or "trying" to be anything" just be. Decide. Embody this energy , you already have it within and its just waiting for u to tap into it. Believe in yourself

🌹🫶

[brewingcoffi]

UNDERTALE: YELLOW ‘REVIVED! CLOVER’ AU

PART 1

Explanation:

AS WE CAN TELL BY THE CUTSCENES, THAT DYING WITHOUT A SOUL ISNT IMMEDIATE. but slowly, it sorta drains away your energy, but seeing that Clover was literally hunched down during Floweys speech before having ENOUGH energy to drag themselves to position their last death place shows how REALLY strong Clover is. So, assuming that they DIDNT immediately passed away after they positioned themselves for prob a few last breath minutes really made me think.

What if Flowey decided to still keep Clover? They were ‘pals’ Yeah. Flowey decided to let them rest… BBBBBut, what if before Clover used their last breath. Floweys forced a TINY ounce of his determination into them. Making Clover a sort of a walking dying corpse.

Nevertheless, since it is shown that Clover has enough energy to drag themselves without their soul. In their now revived state, they can do simple movements by themselves. It’s just their legs can't balance anymore due to a lack of soul energy, so Flowey helps them with their balance and movements by being their support via using Vines as body strings.

Flowey and Them DO meet Frisk at some point,

Clover genuinely looks so tired which make sense because they literally got their energy sucked out after they lost their soul. Clover now has to drink ANY energy giving drinks or they barely functions for 2 hours (Forced to drink coffee.)

Character Info:

Clover & Flowey

Due to Clover's SOUL already being taken Encased in a capsule (Takes places during OG Undertale.)

Flowey mostly ‘Helps’ with their movements since without a soul, their control over their body are VERY WEAK. Revived! Clover can’t do Shit. Only thinks and blinks (But has enough energy to speak simple words.) of course, they can move their arms with any leftover weak energy. but it will never be enough to resists Flowey's control over their movement and actions.

I also wanted to add a detail that the vines will extend more rapidly and secure/support more, depending on what body part(s) Clover is going to use more effortly just incase of Clover was caught in a fight.

Qna questions that are answered for the lore of this AU:

Question 1. You think the lack of a soul might cause empathy/emotion issues like with flowey? Imagine flowey teaching clover to cope with it.

Answer:

“The answer is, Yeah! But, I have a feeling or a (hc of course) that it still has same affect upon losing your soul, slowly but surely. It would take Clover a few days or maybe one month in the underground to suddenly lose their concept of emotions, since like what happened after they lost their soul.

But Clover probably "tries' to hold onto their emotions to as long as possible, to make sure they don't ended up like flowey (I like to think that they slowly soon starts to act semi-like their genocide counterpart; ruthless and bold.)”

Question 2. Wondering how their friends would interact with how... "kind of alive" their body is. Or heck, how they and their friends would interact with the undertale cast.

Before the aftermath, how would Clover "kind-of live" in the underground? With all of the emotionlessness consuming their days, would they act like some kind of cryptid since they don't want their friends to see them as this... soulless shell.

Answer:

1.) I bet they would interact with Clover by treating them like a glass child (Which would start A LOT of conflicts, especially when the side effect of being soulless could affect their moral Justice as well.), and for the UT cast, it depends on your idea!

2.) Clover went into hiding and lived off caffeine and energy drinks(Or leftover food from their inventory.) But, Flowey being their pal would probably give them food if they don't, And Yeah! Clover became this ‘Cryptic entity’ that tends to lurk around where ‘Injustice or corruption’ happens. I like to see Clover, before the emotionlessness began; Was that Clover USED to be this ‘Peacekeeper’ vigilante. Relating to them acting like this ‘Cryptic’ due to them. Even in OG Undertale, I like to imagine that Clover appears for a short period of time and disappears from Frisk point of view(Like that Flowey Easter egg from the OG UT.)

Question 3. does clover tell flowey what limb or does flowey just know?

Answer:

Well, they used The first one, but until a few days or weeks, they’ve gotten used to it, so Flowey now just knows.

4. What exactly WAS flowey's plan for Clover

Answer:

The only logical and ‘in-character’ thought I had of Flowey’s plan; was that Flowey was going to use Clover against or perhaps use Clover as bait/trick the last human child, and help kill King Asgore. Which backfired.

And I also realized that Clover no longer has their Gun, so I wanted to give Clover a weapon to help ppl while also defending themselves. (Clover is used to range, so they probably suck-ass on melee weapons.)

[ambermotta]

Protection Magic: Some Important Concepts

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Long post based on my experience and research. Meant to be informative. I don't claim to know the absolute truth.

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Protection magic is any type of work meant to protect A from B, and there are many ways that this can be done: prayers, charms, talismans, tokens, casting circles, setting up wards, visualization. The list can go on and on because it can be done in many different ways and combining many different methods.

But methods are not the topic of this post today. No, today I would like to talk about some key concepts to keep in mind before getting started on making protections and keeping them effective.

The Importance of Cleansing

Before doing any protection work I like to do a cleansing. Imagine you have an open water bottle, and because it was open, a lot of dirt has found its way into it over time. You decide to seal the bottle so no dirt comes in, but you don't pour out the old water, so you end up sealing it in. Yes, you'll keep more dirt from coming in, but the muck is still there.

It is easier to see this being applied to a physical location, but I personally also apply this to personal protective tokens. I feel they work better when you are taking care of your energies by doing regular cleanses and managing internal negativity.

Important Definitions

Protection ≠ Banishing ≠ Cleansing

I feel a lot of people are under the impression that these are all the same. I think they all work together towards a similar goal, but their jobs are different.

Protection: protecting something from something

Banishing: driving out entities

Cleansing: clearing out energy

You can do cleansing, banishing, and protection at the same time, but that doesn't mean they are the same. You can do a ritual including all of them, but you can also just do a cleansing or just do warding (which is a form of protection).

Note: cleansing is not restricted to “negative energy”. You can cleanse any kind of energy. Exemple: a friend of yours decides tarot is not for them and hands down their deck to you. If you wanna work with that deck it is highly advisable that you do a thorough cleansing of it and then infuse it/consecrate it with the energies you want. It's not that your friend has “bad” energy, it's just that you might not want to work with the same energies they have, or use a tool that has someone else's energy in it.

Not Necessarily a Lazy Job

One important thing with protection magic is that no matter how strong or how successful are at doing it is that it is not failproof. I have yet to see protection work that lasts forever, and there may be a few reasons for it.

Negativity also comes from within

Imagine you have a fish inside an open fish tank. Just like the bottle example earlier, you decide to put a lid on so you prevent leaves from falling into the tank and polluting the water. However, there's a fish, a living being in there, and it produces waste. It is impossible for the fish to live without producing waste. If you don’t regularly clean the water, ammonia and fecal matter will build up.

In this analogy, you are the fish. I am the fish. Humans literally cannot live without ever having a negative thought or feeling, it is part of our existence and we have to live with it. No one lives in constant bliss.

That doesn't mean we have to live in the muck though. That's why cleansing yourself is important.

No one is immune to the environment

Here I have another analogy for you. Imagine you're facing a harsh winter, but you are safe in the security and warmth of your house. Your house is protected from the cold so you don't even mind it. However, you have to go outside. You dress up, go out and you feel very, very cold. You could perhaps wear something warmer, but it will never feel the same as home. Yet it is better than going outside naked, no?

Same thing for energies. You can have protection, but depending on how strong the energy in the environment is you are sure to feel it to at least some degree. However it's best to have some protection than no protection at all.

And there is a difference between Feeling an energy and dwelling in it vs Feeling an energy and not letting it latch onto you.

Energy can wear off, and new energy can build up

Energy is ever changing, ever moving. If you do a strong protection spell once, it can last for a long while, but if you forget about it it will likely lose a lot of its strength over time. Some of what you put out there might wear off and be substituted by something else. The energy can also grow stale, which means it becomes less effective.

But if you do a strong spell every month you will not only make your protections stronger, but also constantly renew the energies and not let them stagnate.

So keep doing cleanses and every now and then give a boost to your protections so they are refreshed and recharged.

Note on "Negative Energy"

One of the main reasons someone might choose to do a protection ritual and a cleansing is to ward off negative energy. But is that really needed? What is "negative energy"?

Negative energy might feel like a sense of heaviness, dread, pain, sadness, feeling ill, angry, sad or anxious. Emotions produce and attract what we can call "negative energy", the same way it can make us feel those things.

And while I personally think nobody wants to feel them, we must understand they are not always bad at their core.

The uncomfortable feelings they can cause may also be a gateway for healing and transformation. Pain tells us there is something that needs to be worked on, that needs change.

If you are feeling negative, ask yourself why. Why does this bother me? What makes me feel this way? What can I learn from this pain?

If you happen to feel negative energy, it is good to cleanse and protect. But I advise you to always look for the source to see what can be done about it or what you can learn from it. Don't just try to use spellcasting to run away from your shit. Own your shit. Deal with it.

Otherwise, it will keep coming back no matter how much protection you have.

Conclusion

It is impossible to always be free from “negative energy” all the time, no matter how strong your protections are. But protections can absorb some of the blows that you would otherwise take and ease the ones you were going to take no matter what.

Protection magic alone will not solve all your problems. It is a great tool to help you keep your center and remain grounded, but it is not usually something you do once and forget. It is a continuous, ever evolving work, meant to be used in conjunction with other types of spellwork.

And most importantly, it can give you some comfort through the many trials of life.

Thank you for reading, and good luck on your path! ♡