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#Evillious be upon ye
teamzacian · 1 year
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Back by not-so-popular demand….
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ullybug · 4 months
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"better carve it on your forehead or tattoo it on your ass, / 'cause who can tell, when the clock strikes twelve, / if today's become tomorrow or if it's all just gone to hell?"
- this too shall pass by danny schmidt
(x, x, x, x, x)
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eggsmuses-a · 1 year
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Life in the Highlands has died down remarkably. Azusa has, for the first time in over a year, space to breathe the fresh breeze that passes through her window. She looks past the brittle sill &. fog-stained glass to the meadows that blow with yellow flowers. She can clearly vision Laika, Falfa &. Shalsha picking the flora from her position at her desk.
Though Laika &. her daughters are in bed right now. The early memories are burnt &. brazen in her mind. It's almost like it's still happening.
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Yes, life in the Highlands had slowed considerably for Azusa. Just how she likes it.
Though, of course, she doesn't see why that should stand to reason that she can't keep to her work.
Her chin slides down her palm, head parked in her hand by her cheekbone as she rolls a quill in hand. The spell before her — the one she has used to enter Vanzeld Castle in the past — takes her attention from any vague calmness prior. "Vosanosanon ujishidau veyani enrila".
A chant taught to her by the Lord of Flies herself, Beelzebub. It would open the gateway to the demon realm &. bring forth Beelzebub. Though, she wondered if there was a way to reverse this effect.
She can teleport, so if she mixes both spells, she's sure she can traverse realms without the need for the Demon King's escort (what a relief, she was tired of Pecora's antics).
Well, she planned to do just that. The Witch of the Highlands was no sooner in a field by herself, drawing a pentagram &. chanting an incantation as she prays to the Goddess that revived her that this goes to plan. 300 years is not nearly enough time for her to know the full range of her arsenal, nor enough to understand the weight of her powers. She moves to the middle, finishing the chant as she seals her eyes tight.
Nothing.
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She opens her eyes again, #゙ ᴀ ——— ❝ That's ... unusual. Maybe I drew the runes wrong ... or- ❞
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Oh. It absolutely had worked. The fireworks just hadn't set off, it seems. She stands not in the Highlands field anymore, but a place completely unrecognisable. It's not Vanzeld Castle.
As if her mind is buffering on slow internet, it takes a solid minute before the Witch realises someone is standing before her (rather disapprovingly). ❝ Ah. Hi. ❞
@quillheel filled the interest tracker !
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alina-dixon · 3 months
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Another Sanji!?
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Pairings: Zoro x Male reader
Warnings: cursing, fluff,
Requested: Yes / No
A/N: I thought it was a funny idea! Have fun reading!😙 (also sorry for not posting! I have a job since last September, but! Don't worry I’m going to be writing more again! YAY!🥳❤️😂)
---
Soooo... It was currently five in the morning and you had a weird but funny dream, it was about you and Sanji pranking Zoro. So when you woke up you looked at the clock. “Mmmmh? Sanji should be awake by now.” you stretched yourself and got out of bed but you had to be quiet so you wouldn't wake up Zoro.
You opened and closed the door quietly and made your way towards the kitchen. “Morning Sunny!” you greeted the ship. Making your way to the kitchen you looked upon the see next to you.
Now you opened the kitchen door gently, you stuck your head through it, and peeked inside. You saw Sanji preparing the breakfast.
So you went inside. “Morning Sanji!” you greeted him smiling brightly, making him glance towards you and he smiled gently. “Morning Y/N” walking towards you with a plate that had some chopped fruits on it, placing it in front of you.
You smiled widely at him. “Thank you, Sanji!” Sanji got back to preparing. “No problem! For you, always” he said softly. You rested your hand under your chin while eating some apple slices. “Say Sanji… do you want to help me with something?” you asked looking at him with hopeful eyes, as he once again turned to you. “It depends, What kind of help do you need?” he asked curious.
You smiled evilly. “I want to Prank Zoro! My idea was to Dress like you! Make my hair like yours! And act like you!” you explained. That got his interest, which made him grin at the thought of Zoro’s dumb look on his face.
Sanji then nodded. “Well then, come with me to my chambers. I will give you some of my clothes and cut your hair” he walked out if the kitchen with you behind. When you got to his Chambers he went to his closet and came back with a pair of his shoes, a yellow shirt, and one of his suits. He put them on his bed and turned to you, grabbed your shoulders, and pushed you into his bathroom.
He sat you down on a chair and got his scissors out. But before he started he looked at you. “You sure that you want that?” he asked, only to make sure that you knew what you were doing. You look up at him nodding excitedly. “Yes, I'm sure! And besides, I was actually thinking for a long time to cut my hair like you. It just looks so good!” Sanji smiled at that. “Thank you. Well then, let's start.” and with that, he started cutting your hair.
Half an hour later he was done, and you were awestruck at how good it looked. He even made your eyebrows! You shot up and hugged Sanji. “It looked perfect! The only thing that is missing is the clothes!” you giggled, and Sanji hugged you back. “I’d do it again if you want. Just come to me if you want to cut your hair” he said as he walked back into his room to get you the clothes for you.
He came back handing them to you. “I sure will do!” you said and Sanji got back out so you could change.
First you put on the shirt, then the suit and for the last, the shoes. When you went back to his room, posing. “And, how do I look?” you said jokingly. Sanji started laughing. “Just like me. Now come let's finish preparing the breakfast before everyone wakes up” he said still chuckling lightly as you both went back to the kitchen to make breakfast.
Most of the stuff was done and on the table. Then you heard the kitchen door open and heard someone humming in confusion. “Huh?” it was Luffy. You and Sanji turned around to greet him. “Morning Luffy. Breakfast is ready” Sanji said, but Luffy only blinked at him. “Another Sanji!? Since when are there Two of you!?” Luffy screamed in confusion.
The others of course heard that and came to see what was going on. Many gasps and shocked faces were looking at the two of You. The one that stood out the most was Zoro… his face when he saw you, his mouth was wide open. “Shity Cook! What have you done to him!?” He grabbed Sanji's shirt and got into his face angry.
Sanji of course screamed back at him. “Shut it you stupid Moss head! We were only cooking!” Zoro scoffed at that angrily. You pushed them apart. “Oi! Sanji! Marimo! Stop fighting, and eat something!” you said and hit both of their heads. Zoro looked at you in disbelief. “Stop talking like him! You are not him!” he tried to reason with you. Which made you roll your eyes, and then smiled because you couldn't stay serious anymore. The same goes for Sanji and the both of you start laughing.
Everyone looked at you confused. “Bwahahaha!!! It was just a Prank! And it was totally worth it!” you said while you gave Sanji a high five. “Definitely, that stupid look on his face was hilarious!” Sanji laughed back.
Zoro grew a thick Mark on his forehead! “Stop laughing already!” he screamed. You walked in towards him and took his hand, and walked with him to the table to sit him down. “Stop being so angry, and start eating, will you?” you said as you sat down on his lap.
Zoro scoffed but he gave you a kiss, before he started eating. And what didn't surprise anyone is, that Luffy was already eating the whole time.
When everyone was at the table, Nami spoke up. “Y/N, to be honest with you that hair looks good on you. The clothes too. On the next Island I’ll take you to go shopping with me!” she said excitedly. “Thank you! And sure why not, sounds fun!” you said happily.
Robin nodded too. “Nami is right, you look good. I think I'll go with the two of you,” she said calmly. “Oi! He is my Boyfriend-” Zoro got cut off by an angry-looking Nami that hit him on the head. “And!? He's our friend! Now stop being an idiot!” Nami screamed, as everyone laughed.
You Started to cuddle Zoro’s neck and kissed his head. “Don't worry I could never love anyone but you,” you assured him, to which He only responded by hugging you tightly.
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yestrday · 6 months
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evilly rubs hands together. may I suggest making derogatory comments w/ them in the room & forcing them to agree with azul from twst as the victim
oh twst... the bane of my existence.... i havent touched u in a long time but ur men has been on my mind rotating like casserole....
( objectifying, collar )
part of an ongoing event!
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╰┈➤ AZUL ASHENGROTTO of octavinelle.
"hm, i think silver suits them far better than gold," you hum, fingering the shiny collar around your toy's pale neck. "suits his hair, don't you think? i just had this one made, and it looks quite charming, if i do say so myself."
the deep blue glow from the aquarium luminates the dim lounge, making it seem more of a bar rather than a cafe. lounging upon its cushioned seats, you idly chat and drink with your friends, all the while enjoying the cling of your cute little plaything.
azul shivers as your friends leer at his collar and sidle up to you, despite the embarassed blush on his face and quivering lips. as he shifts, the slip dress he has on hikes up and reveals his smooth upper thigh, before he squeaks miserably and pulls it down in haste. you laugh as he buries his face in your arm.
"easily embarrassed, is he?" a friend of yours jeers. he tilts the wine glass towards the two of you. "tamed and collared azul ashengrotto, octavinelle's head and owner of mostro lounge. you sure move quick."
"well, that's just what happens to impostors who try to be more than what they actually are," you chuckle, and let the wine trickle down your throat after. "can you believe it? this little thing tried to scam me into a contract after the first meeting— as if i don't have everything i could possibly want."
the groups laughs at the sheer audacity of azul, and the man burns even brighter than possible. he prided himself in being up-to-date with the latest information, and approaching you was the biggest mistake of his life. how could he have let such a vital information slip past his fingers?! it was humiliating, utter—
"ng-gh?!" azul yelps as you tug him by the collar, and he looks up to see that same prideful grin on your face. he wants to hate that stupid expression, the same one you wore when you scammed him. it's the expression of one who was born with it all, but how could he hate it when you looked so dastardly handsome with it.
"father tried to dissuade me from bringing in some nobody from some ocean. you wouldn't have believed the shit i had to do to persuade him." appalingly enough, that brings a flutter to azul's stomach. exactly what lengths did you go to just to keep him? "but i think the investment was worth it."
"i heard about it," one hums. "he's pretty enough... but all that just for him?"
"just?" you chuckle, tugging the collar again and bringing him to your chest. he tenses when he feels your arm wrap protectively around his waist— shudders when you squeeze it— and he instinctively brings his head to rest on your chest. your friends have seen all kinds of men and women drape themselves over you, but not as intimate as this one has. they regard the both of you with amusement— your latest plaything's thighs straddling your one leg and your hand petting his hair and eliciting the faintest of whimpers from him. "come on, you should see how good he looks when he's begging for more. or how shy he gets when he puts on my latest gift in front of me."
"[y - y. name]!" he whispers your name frantically, looking at you with panicked eyes. "the things you're saying...!"
"what, getting shy now?" you tease him, rubbing the tip of ear and watching him shudder. "come on, you're my pet, azul. i only pick the finest. you have the right to know how gorgeous you are despite being so filthy. aren't i, right?"
it's not a rhetorical question. your haughty gaze pierces right into his trembling pupils. you want to show off to these people, and you expect him to comply. he averts his gaze from those eyes. "y... yes..."
you tug his collar again, forcing him to look at you. "louder."
"y-yes!" he yelps, squeezing your leg between his thighs in panic. "you... you pick the prettiest things... i'm..." he blushes, looking down at the body he had always been so insecure of. "i'm no exception..."
you're not insulting him— quite the opposite, in fact, but azul finds no comfort. not with this flimsy silk dress and the predatory eyes on his back. he watches as your grin grows wider.
"of course not," you grin, tracing the shiny new collar and looping your finger around to bring him closer to your face. "and you're the prettiest of the bunch."
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onedayimgonnasnap · 1 year
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Meeting His Parents
Floyd Leech X (G/N) Reader
Type: Crack & Fluff
(Ngl If you date Floyd- Have fun surviving-)
Also mentions for those contributed to the idea
@morpheuscorner-blog @u-ntitled-s-eries @sleepy-sick @marvelous-maxi @hipsterteller @sleepybunzzz
@lana-nanana @applesaucer
You never expected this…
You were at the Ramshackle on the couch eating some ice cream til you gotta call from someone.
You wished you never answered because if you didn’t then oh boy, how relaxed you would have been.
“Shrimmmpy It’s an emergency”
Oh boy…
“Me and Jade are in iron bars hehe”
“GOD DAMNIT-“
How did this even happen you have no damn clue.
���HOW'D THIS HAPPEN FLOYD?”
“Welllll-“
Flashback;
A student made a deal with Azul, basically for better grades. However the student got cocky and didn’t give his half of the bargain leaving Azul there like a fool.
So Azul sent Jade and Floyd to take care of it…
Jade and Floyd broke into a students dorm, the student was from Ignihyde, so he basically thought that with the amount of security and tech plus making a deal with Crowley for online classes would save him from Azul’s original wrath.
It didn’t.
Floyd broke in through the vents on the ceiling and Jade broke down the metal door with a psychotic grin.
There were particles from the ceiling coming down since the whole ceiling fell, as the student tried to run past Jade just to trip on air.
When the student fell to the floor a hand grabbed his head to make him face two sadistic eels.
——
The look you had at the moment, your mouth and eyes both wide open.
“Uhh Shrimpy? Hello?” Floyd Called out
To be honest you knew what you were getting into when dating the little bastard.
Except your relationship started with Floyd following you around and teasing you. It was pure Stockholm syndrome.
That’s the excuse you gave Ace at least, because you’d have to be crazy to date the strange eel.
“Floyd…”
“Yes?” You can hear his happy voice through the phone.
“What the fuck-“
.
.
.
You were pissed the fuck off. Not only are you spending your allowance. Hard earned money, testifying in court, and you had to meet the bastard's parents.
How does all of this happen in one singular day?
You got ready in your nicest clothes, getting some cash, you dropped off Grimm to play with Ace and Deuce.
You even brought chocolate to buy his parents' favor for you. This is bad the moment the fish mafia decides they don’t like you? Who knows what will happen.
You ended up at the front of the school’s discipline department where Floyd and Jade are being locked up.
As you walked in they didn’t even bother checking you due to the fact you were magicless and that you were a regular from the first years shenanigans.
As you walked up to the cell Jade and Floyd were you heard the most ear piercing scream.
“SHRIMMPY. THE LOVE OF MY LIFE, IM SO HAPPY!!!”
Floyd screamed trying to somehow fit between the tight bars wanting to hug you.
“Hello prefect, are you here to help us prisoners out?” Jade smiled in a teasing way knowing you were pissed off.
“Cmon don’t give us that look Shrimpy, me and Jade are as innocent as dolphins-“
“Wrong sea creature Floyd, dolphins are menaces.”
“No he’s right you both are menaces like a dolphin.” You said while glaring at them both.
Floyd and Jade began to fake cry, you were so done with them both.
You looked down at your phone because you needed to check the time however-
“FLOYD GOD DAMN DON'T EAT THE CHOCOLATE FROM MY BAG THAT'S NOT FOR YOU-“
“WHAT DOES SHRIMPY HAVE ANOTHER EEL IN THEIR LIFE?!” Floyd began to sob uncontrollably.
“THEY'RE FOR YOUR PARENTS WHO SHOULD'VE USED PROTECTION WHEN THEY MADE YOU JADE-“
You began to choke him while he had chocolate in his mouth.
Jade, clearly amused at the scene, started giggling evilly.
“MY BABIES!! WHAT HAPPENED?!” A voice yelled out.
Oh shit-
“Now who is this?” Asked a tall man with teal hair and golden eyes.
Immediate panic bestowed upon you as you saw both Mr. leech and Mrs. Leech walked in the room.
Mrs. Leech clearly in mother bear mode was about to run at you and kill you,
“This is Shrimpy!!! They’re my partner!” Floyd said happily, knowing the exact situation you were in.
Jade started laughing even more at the situation.
“OH SO THIS IS YOUR PARTNER!? THEY'RE SO CUTE. LOOK HOW TINY THEY ARE!!” Mama leech ran up to you just to squeeze you.
You felt bones pop.
“EHH, MAMA NOO THEY ARE MY SHRIMPY-“ Floyd yelled and began to rattle the cage as his mother squeezed you putting your face against her chest as you started to turn purple.
Floyd was clearly jealous.
Mr. Leech who was already clearly amused.
“Aww you poor dear, did Floyd blackmail you into a relationship? He did that all the time in his Elver years when he wanted to make friends.”
He laughed.
“That’s not true-“ Floyd pouted.
“I recall that was true, you chased down a mermaid for friendship once brother.” Jade grinned.
“Also mother you might wanna let go of your dear son's lover. They’re turning purple.” Jade said.
“Oh right sorry, I can’t let the future member of our group die on me.” His mother giggled.
“Now then, I think I would like to spoil Floyd’s partner! Sorry boys but mama’s gotta make sure this one stays.”
Mrs. Leech yelled while grabbing your hand, dragging your hand away from the cell.
“Yea boys sorry, this is your problem now.” Mr. Leech smiled while running after his wife.
Floyd and Jade are now panicking as their last phone call was used.
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mymelodymia · 7 months
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The chaotic duo
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Summary: you and your dad are the most chaotic due ever.
Warnings: tony being evil, y/n getting revenge 😈,
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The ENTIRE team had become aware that you both were chaotic, but oh, my, goodness you too together? Jeez, I dont think the universe could handle it.
It had become a regular occurrence to see you being chased by tony, for reference, they had just seen you running for your life, screaming through the tower, and once you ran out of the room, they'd see tony run in like,
"Which way she go?" A few of them were on tonys team and pointed straight to your direction, and some pointed in the opposite direction. Eventually tony gave up and guessed, and he got lucky I guess 🤷‍♀️
Then he'd just run into another room and they'd just hear a shrill screech, then see tony walking in heading straight back to where he came from with you over his shoulder.
You kicking and hitting him in a attempt to free yourself, this did nothing. You screaming various protests against this act of evilness 😡
"We can talk about this!"
"No we cant."
"YES WE CAN!!"
He walked into an empty room before plopping you on the couch, he began to smile evilly, you knew what was coming at this point (T^T)
"Noo!" You could barely get this plead out before he began tickling you. You started to laugh uncontrollably, kicking your feet and squirming to try and get out of his iron grip (pun so, fucking, intended)
"NOOOHOHOHOHHO! DAAAHHAHHADD!!"
"STOOAAHAHHAHAHPP!"
"Stop what, this?" He said as he reached for your underarms, causing your laughter to go silent for a moment. After a few more minutes of this torture, he let you go. The whole team was still sitting in the next room over, listening in horror, trying to withhold their own laughter.
"That poor kid." Clint spoke up, causing everyone to break out into a fit of laughter
+•°+*°•++•°+*°•+
That night, you walked into your bathroom and remembered, you still had temporary green hair dye fron last years halloween from when you dressed up as Beetlejuice.
You decided that this was your chance to get some revenge 😈
so, you grabbed the hair dye and slowly creeped into your fathers bedroom, made your way over to his king sized bed, and unscrewed the lid.
You dumped a large clump into the palm of your hand, when it made contact with his head It made a small 'plop' sound, which made you freeze for a few moments before returning to your dirty-work.
Using both hands this time, you spread it around on his scalp, and luckily he was a very heavy sleeper, so this didn't even make him stirr.
Once you finished this part of revenge, you walked across the large bedroom and got a sticky note and wrote the words 'revenge mother-fricker' and stuck it on his forehead
You could only get one side of his head covered in the dye givin that he was laying on his side. Now you just had to wait till morning.
+•°+*°•+
The morning after you did this you were sitting at the table, gobbling down on some cereal. Then tony walked in, half of his hair dyed green, and the sticky note still on his forehead.
you immediately started giggling, which turned into laughing. Almost choking on your cereal, which you had to calm down to get it to slide down your throat.
"Okay, now i know who did it" tony said trying to withhold the smile that perched upon his lips.
"I think it was obvious from the start-" nat said crossing her arms on her chest, being cut of by you falling out of your chair, holding your hand on your mouth as an attempt to stop the laughter.
"Thats literally worse then yesterday and no one is even near her" clint whispered to nat.
"Thats, hahAA..thats what you get"
"How is it....oh" he said when he remembered his little scheme from yesterday 😳
+•°+*°•+
You guys also had your cute moments, for reference. Right now you and the whole team was watching tangled together in the living room
You had drifted off on your fathers chest, your hand just under his arc reactor, his hand on your back, the other on your forearm (that wasn't on his chest) rubbing it with his thumb.
You loved moments like this, it gave you a feeling of peace after a long day of dealing with his and your sassyness.
Tony also fell asleep about halfway through the film, the two of you resting in each others warmth.
+•°+*°•++•°+*°•+
A/N: HAHAHA! You think I'd finally make a fic with no lovey dovey stuff? Nope! HAHAA-
Tags
@animealways // @white-wolf-buckaroo // @tonystark-au // @yummyangy // @zebralover
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kirbygirl20 · 1 month
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laughs evilly....hehe sexy girl crossbones be upon ye
(Koffin K doesn't care tho that's just his nemesis)
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thelemonsnek · 2 months
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bio doodles :]
[image id: a number of ms paint doodles. Going in some semblance of order, first is a drawing of a stick figure type guy. It says sadly "ohh since im doing this digitally i cant doodle in the margins when i get bored". Then it smiles a huge fanged smile, hands held up evilly, "HAHA I HAVE AN ART TABLET". It looks out at the viewer and points "WOE DOODLES BE UPON YE". Next is a doodle of a very cute possum with big innocent eyes, labeled "Lassy <3". There is a wurmple, a wattrel labelled "freak," a torracat labelled "Spork <3 <3", and a hisuian sneasel looking intently at a plump bean, and another hisuian sneasel which looks exceedingly happy, labelled "sneasels are better purple sunday!!!!" There is also a drawing of a mismagius, with a doodle of Ingo next to it labelled "ohhh theres smth here" and an arrow pointing between the two. And finally, is a drawing of a merged pair of circles. "mitosis? WRONG wurmple" and the pair of circles has been turned into the eyes for a wurmple. End id]
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fluffapalooza · 1 year
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Well, it's that time of year again. What time of year, you say? Oh, hello there, Rumbelle newbies, I see you there, busily working away on filling out the ballot for the Chipped Cup Awards and flailing happily if some of your fics were nominated. Congratulations, and good, you should be in the right mood.
This is a fairy tale fandom, so let me tell you a story. Once upon a time, in the early times of the fandom, some of the Rumbelle writers looked at each other and said "Let's make all the Rumbellers cry". This challenge was taken up, and the Rumbelle War commenced, in which works of great angst and darkness were written. Readers cried and cursed the writers, who cackled evilly as they collected the broken hearts which were flung at their feet, and tucked them away in boxes and bags and old wooden card catalog drawers (because Rumbellers are big on libraries).
But because there must be light to balance the darkness, a new event was created -- FLUFFAPALOOZA.
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Fluffapalooza is when you write and draw and gif the fluffiest fics/art/scenes you can think of. Haven't got the time or spoons to do any of that but you've got ideas? Post them as prompts, or headcanons! Or if you want a challenge, make a post announcing that you want to play "Fluffify this!" and invite people to send you angsty-sounding prompts in the form of sentence starters, which you will then sneer at and say "Not today! Today is for fluff!" and write a little prompt fill in which you turn that prompt into something fluffy. (See an example here.) Or maybe you just want to rhapsodise about Rumbelle and talk about their chemistry, or what the ship means to you and how it affected your life. Maybe you want to reminisce about how we started adding silly Rumbelle captions to every picture of a croc or gator or lizard that crossed our dashes. Anything goes! Tag everything with #fluffapalooza if you want it reblogged here!
Oh boy, you're saying (I hope), it sounds like fun! When is it? FLUFFAPALOOZA IS FEBRUARY 12, AKA SKIN DEEP DAY, THE ELEVENTH ANNIVERSARY OF THE FOUNDING OF OUR SHIP. THIS IS OUR HIGH HOLY DAY, GUYS, LET'S KEEP THE LOVE FLOWING AND CELEBRATE IT RIGHT.
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(Oh yeah, and I believe it was in that contract you had to sign when you entered the fandom (you DID sign that scroll of parchment you were sent, yes?) that you have to reblog Love Is Purple and Love Is Still Purple at least once a year as part of the Anniversary Rites.)
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aemiron-main · 8 months
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yooo fostering cats is such a great hobbie that's so cool!! how did you get into that i always wondered how that works in the US, does it work via working with a shelter or are there other ways? (but also great long term planning for your evil villain ways 👏👏👏 now you already have an excess supply of cats you can pull in your lap and pet while evilly scheming how to terrorize tumblr. fantastic organizing on your part, now you only need to rent a villain layer with a shark tank or something for the complete package)
AAAAAAA HELLO THANK YOU!!! <33333333333
I got into it by growing up on a farm/living rurally my whole life & having rural neighbours/being involved in those communities and unfortunately a LOT of farm people see cats as disposable/are very very lax about cat safety and survival and health and don’t spay or neuter etc, so over time as a kid/teen I just got a reputation for being The Guy You Can Bring Unwanted Cats/Kittens To Without Questions Asked because a lot of shelters etc won’t come out and catch feral cats, but I’m happy to go to peoples’ places and catch them (i should become like. a cat whisperer or smthn) and a lot of shelters also will NOT accept newborn kittens since they don’t have the resources to care for them as frequently as the kittens need, whereas I will care for newborn kittens. Shelters where I live are also turning animals away frequently because they’re sadly too full, so instead of spending hours trying to find a shelter with room, people will just ask me!
So yeah, people usually give me a call when they’ve got kittens/cats they can’t care for & either drop them off or I go pick them up!
And I’m actually Canadian, so I’m not sure how it works in the US, but I’m also not fully sure how working with a shelter works in Canada, as I just do things more informally! :DD As wonderful as I’m sure it is working with a shelter/I’d encourage people to do so, I’ve found that I’m most helpful to the animals by just doing things on my own, as a lot of rural folks around here will just leave the animals to die if the choice is between “take them to a shelter which is going to be a fairly long drive to the nearest city” or “turn a blind eye and claim it’s nature taking its course” but when they have the third option of “call that one cat dude who lives down the road and who will happily take them off your hands,” more kitties tend to get helped!
AND HEBFNFFN HELP YES IT IS GREAT LONG TERM VILLAIN PLANNING FOR MY EVIL WAYS HEHEHEHE <<333 im scheming, im plotting, i’m raining hellfire upon byler tumblr via my kitten minions and their paws of fury….. and oh my god YOURE SO RIGHT I NEED A VILLAIN LAIR AND A SHARK TANK YESSS…. Maybe i can just put little shark costumes on the kitties….
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trashyswitch · 1 year
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Hide & Seek With Dad
Gregory is playing Hide & Seek with a twist. When Freddy finds him, Gregory lets out a certain word on accident...
This fanfic was suggested by an anonymous person. I hope you like it!
Freddy was smiling as he looked around the pizzaplex, wiggling his fingers in the air for Gregory to see. 
“Gregory…where are youuu?” Freddy teased. 
Gregory was hiding under a table, giggling with his hands over his mouth. He couldn’t stay quiet even if his life depended on it! It was like telling a whale to walk on its tail. It just cannot be done. 
Freddy could hear the ring giggles behind him. He knew Gregory was behind him. It was a little bit obvious…but Freddy wanted to play for a little longer. So he pretended he didn’t hear any of the giggle fits that Gregory was letting out. 
Freddy checked under the stage. “Is Gregory here?” Freddy asked. 
Gregory’s giggles grew a little louder as he watched Freddy check obviously empty spots. 
Freddy walked up to the Monty Golf area. “Hey Gregory! You in there?” He asked. 
Gregory held his stomach as he laughed. “Nohoho! Ihi’m not hihihiding there!” Gregory told him. 
“Okaaay…whatever you say, superstar.” Freddy joked. 
Freddy walked up to the seating area and looked up above all the tables and chairs. “Hmmm…where could Gregory beeeeee…” Freddy teased. 
Gregory was squeezing his palm against his own mouth to try and stay quiet. But those dreaded giggles kept filling up in his lungs. It was impossible to control them properly.
Freddy looked down at the one table that Gregory happened to be under. “Is he…” Freddy picked up the table and looked under the table. “Here?” He asked. 
Gregory laid himself onto his back as he cackled and laughed with his hands on his stomach. 
“Hahahahaha! Ihihit tohook you thihihis lohohong to fihihihind mehehehe?!” Gregory asked. 
Freddy couldn’t help but chuckle himself. “Indeed it did. You’re a really good hider, Gregory.” Freddy told him. 
“Ihihi’m nohohot!” Gregory reacted, poking Freddy’s foot. 
“And you know what happens when I find you, don’t you?” Freddy added. 
Gregory blushed as he tried to contain his giggles. But like a dam, it was impossible to cover it back up without water constantly spilling out through the wood. The giggles worked exactly like water, in Gregory’s eyes. 
Freddy wiggled his fingers evilly in Gregory’s face. Gregory squealed and giggled even more upon seeing the fingers. “Would you look at that? HeyGregory! No hands!” Freddy teased. 
“Shuhuhush! Shuhuhush yohohohour mohohouth!” Gregory laughed. 
Freddy gasped and put both his hands onto his own hips. “You DARE speak to Freddy Fazbear like that?!” Freddy teased. 
Gregory’s laughter only grew in volume the more he was teased. He felt both embarrassed, and excited. The boy loved being teased and tickled like this. That was the whole reason why Gregory suggested they play this game! 
Freddy picked up Gregory by the armpits and turned him around so Gregory’s back was facing Freddy. He held onto Gregory with only one arm across his upper chest, and used his other hand to tickle the boy’s belly and sides. 
Gregory threw his head back and laughed hysterically. “GAHAHAHAhahahahaha! Hahahahahaha!” Gregory reacted. 
Freddy chuckled. “Such a ticklish little Gregory…and yet, so little time!” Freddy teased. 
“Whahahat dohoho yohou mehehehean?” Gregory asked. “Whehehe hahave ahahahall nihihight!” 
“Well…Yeah, I suppose that’s true.” Freddy replied casually. 
Freddy snuck a finger into Gregory’s belly button. “Gitchy gitchy gitchy goo!” Freddy teased. “Tickle tickle tickle, little Gregory!” 
Gregory laughed and waved his arms absolutely everywhere. “HAHAHAHahahahaha! Nohoho behehehelly buhuhuttohohon!” Gregory cackled. 
Freddy stopped tickling and thought for a moment. “Hmmmm…” He hummed, thinking. 
Gregory took advantage of this break. “Whaha-…whahat?” Gregory asked. 
Freddy slowly smirked as he looked down at the little boy. “How about…yes belly button!” Freddy declared as he poked and swirled his finger in Gregory’s belly button all over again. 
Gregory bursted out laughing right away and kicked his feet rapid fire. It looked almost like he was running in midair with how much he was kicking and moving his legs! At the same time, his arms were exactly like flopping noodles. 
“Ihihihi- Ihihihi’m sohohoho tihihicklihish!” Gregory told him. 
“Really?! I had no idea!” Freddy joked. “How ticklish could you be, Gregory?” 
Gregory only shook his head. “Veheheheryhyhyhy!” Gregory replied. 
Freddy stopped tickling Gregory for a few moments. “Where else are you ticklish, superstar?” 
Gregory tilted his head with a giddy, yet confused face. “Why wohohould-” Gregory looked up at Freddy. “Why would I tell you that?!” 
Freddy shrugged his shoulders. “Is it really a surprise?” Freddy asked. 
“No. It’s a challenge!” Gregory told him. “Tickle me to find out!” 
Freddy chuckled and shrugged his shoulders. “If you say so…” 
Freddy lifted Gregory up with his right arm under Gregory’s arms. With Gregory secure in his grip, Freddy immediately started tickling Gregory’s right hip. 
Gregory squealed and threw his head back with loud laughter.  “BAHAHAhahahaHAHAHAHA!” Gregory laughed. “OHOHO NOHOHO! YOHOHOU FOHOUND MY HIHIHIPS!” 
And this was just from one hip being tickled…
Freddy gasped and smiled brightly as he kept kneading the right hip. “Did I find another ticklish spot on your body? How fun!” Freddy reacted. 
“YOHOHOHOU DIHIHIHID.” Gregory replied. 
Freddy chuckled. “How cute…Little Gregory likes these tickles!” Freddy reacted. 
“Mmmmmhmhmhmhmhm- Mahahahaybehehehe?” Gregory mumbled. 
“Hmmm…And what would happen if I…” Freddy stopped tickling Gregory’s right hip, and moved his hands over to Gregory’s left hip to start kneading it. 
Gregory squeaked and yelped as Freddy’s hand got closer and closer. “NO! NOHOHO-” 
And the hand touched down onto Gregory’s hip, and skittered into Gregory’s hip. Gregory went absolutely ballistic! “BAHAHAHAHAHA! DAHAHAHAHAD!” Gregory cackled and laughed. 
Freddy widened his eyes and stopped tickling right away. “I am so sorry, Gregory. I did not mean to bring back any childhood memories.” Freddy admitted. 
Gregory tilted his head as he looked at Freddy, somewhat dazed from the tickles. Childhood memories? What was he talking about? 
Then, Gregory widened his eyes as he realized what had happened…
He had said ‘Dad’ amidst his laughter…
Gregory covered his mouth and looked at Freddy with scarlet cheeks. “I…I didn’t mean to say that…” Gregory told him. “That was a slip…I feel terrible.” 
Freddy tilted his head. “So…It wasn’t a memory?” Freddy asked. 
Freddy raised his eyebrows. 
W-Wait…
“You…You called ME Dad?” He asked next. 
Gregory looked down, embarrassed and scared he had hurt him. 
Freddy wasn’t sure how to react. He wanted to tell him it was okay…But he wasn’t sure if he should do that or just leave it. 
What would a father do? 
“I…” Gregory mumbled. 
But Gregory paused his words when he felt himself get picked up. Gregory struggled to look behind him, but widened his eyes when he felt the orange animatronic arms around his body. 
“It is okay. I like being called Dad.” Freddy told him. 
Gregory softened his expression upon hearing that. He was confused, but more relieved. “You…You do?” 
Freddy smiled and wiggled his ears. “I do, Gregory.” 
Gregory smiled a bit, unable to see Freddy’s wiggling ears. 
“Oh my gosh- His ears are wiggling!” Someone whispered loudly. 
“It’s a human child…why is Freddy so attached to a human child?” Another voice asked. 
“Awww, he loves him!” A third voice reacted. 
Freddy turned around to look at the location of the voices. The bodies that were standing in front of them were animatronics. In fact, they were familiar animatronics. 
“Roxanne…Monty…” Freddy mumbled first. 
“Chica…” Gregory mumbled. 
The animatronics all smiled a bit. Roxanne was the first to speak up. “So…who’s the mom in this situation then?” She asked. “Me? Or Chica?” 
Gregory couldn’t help but giggle at her response. “Hehehe! I don’t know.” Gregory replied. 
Freddy smiled. “Perhaps both of you can be moms.” Freddy offered. 
“Nah…One of us needs to be a mom, and the other needs to be a cool aunt.” Roxanne told them. 
Chica giggled. “I call being the mom!” Chica declared. 
Roxanne smirked. “Then I call being the cool aunt that spoils the nephews with tickles.” Roxanne took Gregory out of Freddy’s grip and started skittering her bright green nails onto Gregory’s belly. 
Gregory squeaked and giggled helplessly. “HEhehehehey! Ohokahahahay, thahahat’s fahahahair.” Gregory replied. 
Chica giggled. “And what about you, Monty?” Chica asked. 
Monty laughed. “I call being a BIG, BUFF, SCARY UNCLE!” Monty declared. 
Roxanne guffawed at that. “Says the gentle giant!” Roxanne teased. 
Monty growled. “Excuse me?!” 
“Gentle, giant. Monty is a gentle giant.” Roxanne teased. 
“I’m NOT!” Monty yelled. 
“You are too! You were at the beginning, and you will remain a gentle giant for a long time.” Roxanne declared. 
Monty growled and shouted super loudly, to show his anger and frustration. But Freddy just chuckled. “...Or he could be the terrible toddler.” Freddy added. 
Everyone, except for Monty, bursted out laughing at that revelation. 
Monty only crossed his arms and huffed. “Only a teddy bear would look at an animatronic with a deep voice and call it a toddler.” Monty muttered. 
Freddy rolled his eyes and patted Monty’s head like a human would pat the head of a dog. “Good toddler.” Freddy said. 
Gregory giggled. “Maybe you wanna visit the Daycare Attendant while you’re at it, Monty the toddler?” Gregory teased. 
Roxanne and Chica bursted out laughing, while Monty froze in pure anger. “WHAT?!” Monty yelled. 
“Oh my gosh, Monty would SQUASH the Daycare Attendant!” Roxanne reacted. 
“Not necessarily.” Chica added. “Have you seen the video of Monty being tickled by the Daycare Attendant?” Chica asked. 
Monty gasped and stomped up to Chica. “You so much as OPEN YOUR BEAK-” 
Chica giggled and took off sprinting the other way.
But not before yelling the following words over her shoulder pads: 
“Get his neck! He’s ticklish on his neck!” 
Freddy would keep this important information locked up in his brain. He HAD to try this out later…
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(Futzing around more with GG Season 6. Shit is resolved before Rory's bday, and before Jess comes to town)
Logan breaks up with her on a cold night, a few weeks before her birthday.
He talks about how she’s changed; or that maybe she was always this person and he never noticed. That she has all these “secrets” when really what he means is that he never took an interest in her life in Stars Hollow, and so missed the fact that her mother lives across the street from two famous and influential comedians.
Her having never mentioned it seems to be something Logan can’t get over, and so they’re done. She goes back to her mother’s house instead of Paris’ place, and curls up on the couch, letting her mother feed her junk food and expound upon plans for her twenty-first birthday.
But the breakup casts a gloomy shadow over it, and she excuses herself, saying she’s tired. 
She doesn’t sleep.
***** 
“Logan dumped her,” Lorelai explains at the diner the next morning.
“What the hell?” Luke asks, obviously offended by this turn of events. “What is wrong with that kid?” 
“He’s…he’s rich,” Lorelai shrugs helplessly. “He’s rich and he’s used to getting his way, and he’s not used to being with someone who has a life of her own that maybe doesn’t include him in every single corner.” 
Luke just looks confused.
“She’s talking about us,” Lenny says from his and Midge’s table. “Logan was angry that he didn’t know we were close with Rory, because we’re…us.” 
Luke rolls his eyes deeply. “I should go smack that kid in his mouth.” 
“Do not do that,” Lorelai orders. “Please don’t do that. She’s bummed. She’s…she’s having a hard time right now, the last thing she needs is for the guy she’s probably still in love with to get bloodied by her almost stepfather..” 
“You’ll let me know if there’s anything I can do?” Luke requests.
“I will,” Lorelai grins sadly, reaching up to peck his lips. “Her birthday is coming up, and I’m going to plan our Atlantic city trip, and hopefully that will cheer her up.” 
Midge frowns. “Atlantic City?” 
“Yeah,” Lorelai grins back at her. “We’re gonna drink and gamble and-” 
“Lorelai, sweetie. Atlantic City,” Midge says, her voice pained. 
“Midge,” Lorelai counters. 
“What about Vegas?” 
“Midge-” 
“I will pay for Vegas,” Midge promises. “Hotel, airfare, meals, the whole nine. Shy has a residency at the Four Seasons, you’ll love it.” 
Lorelai huffs out a soft breath. “I really appreciate it, Midge, but Atlantic City was going to be our thing.” 
“Vegas can still be your thing,” Midge promises. “Vegas is way less depressing.” 
Lenny concedes that point with a nod. “Also legal sex work.” 
“Thinking of going pro?” Midge asks him jokingly. 
“I do look great in heels,” he counters with a grin.
“You two don’t want to come with, right?” Lorelai asks. 
“God, no, I hate Vegas,” Lenny snaps. “Also I think I’m still banned from that one time.” 
Luke wrinkles his nose. “You got banned from all of Vegas?” 
“I accidentally sprayed Pearl Bailey with a fire extinguisher,” Lenny explains sheepishly. “Honestly, I didn’t mean to. It was a total fluke. But uh…it got me deep sixed for good.” 
Lorelai tries not to laugh as she turns to Midge. “And you?” 
“Will stay home and feed Luke and Paul Anka while you’re away,” Midge promises. “And tell Shy you’re coming so he can drag Rory up on stage and embarrass her.” 
Lorelai sighs and closes her eyes. “Am I going to regret saying yes?” 
“Not unless you intend to take your mother with you,” Midge smirks. 
Lorelai gives a whole body shudder. “Ugh, being with my mother in Vegas.” 
“Your mother at a strip club,” Lenny supplies evilly. 
“Just for that I’m not bringing you some guy’s g-string as a souvenir,” Lorelai threatens. 
“Shit, and I was so looking forward to that!” 
**** 
“So, funny thing happened today.” 
Rory blinks at her mother. “Funny haha or funny peculiar?” 
“Funny…unexpected,” Lorelai says. “I told Midge and Lenny about our Atlantic City trip, and they…offered to send us to Vegas instead.” 
“Wow,” Rory says. “That’s really generous of them.” 
“I mean, I can totally tell them that the birthday girl still wants to go to Atlantic City,” Lorelai says quickly. “We don’t have to take them up on it.” 
“It just-” Rory purses her lips. “Is this what Logan was talking about? Having and using connections?” 
“You’re not using anyone, Sweets,” Lorelai tells her soothingly. “Midge and Lenny love you. Love us. We may not technically be related, but we’re family to them, and they want to do something nice for you on your birthday.” 
“Are they coming with?” Rory asks. 
“Turns out Lenny is still banned from Las Vegas,” Lorelai snorts. “They just want us to have a nice time. Stay somewhere fancy. Eat good food, see Shy Baldwin live. And we can still do all the things we planned. Just…swankier.” 
“I just keep thinking about Logan,” Rory confesses. “I’m…I’m reevaluating things.” 
“Logan was wrong to say those things to you,” Lorelai tells her. “Midge and Lenny have known you since you were two years old. They changed your diapers. Lenny taught you how to read a newspaper. Midge made you chicken and rice soup when you had the flu for the first time. Lenny and Morey once wore tiaras to your birthday party because you required everyone to wear one because everyone was a princess. You watched BIll Clinton get elected president on their couch while eating sourdough pretzels. Whoever they are in their professional lives, they are, first and foremost, to us, the old couple who lives across the street and has always, always been there for us. And Logan’s opinion about that relationship holds absolutely no water because he didn’t start caring about your life here in Stars Hollow until he found out who they were.” 
Rory thinks that over, staying quiet.
“Midge and Lenny adore you,” Lorelai shrugs. “You and Jess and Lane. They love you guys. Don’t let some jerk who doesn’t understand what it is to be a part of a real community ruin that for you, Rory.” 
Rory purses her lips and stays silent for another moment. “So…Vegas?” 
Lorelai grins slowly. “Vegas.” 
***** 
“I’m going to throw Rory a birthday party,” her mother tells her the next evening over the phone as Lorelai works at the Dragonfly.
“Gonna be kind of hard without the birthday girl in attendance, but you do you,” Lorelai tells her. 
“What are you talking about?” 
“We’re leaving town for Rory’s birthday,” Lorelai explains with a grin. “We’re going to Vegas.” 
“You most certainly are not,” Emily snaps. “Vegas is vile, and tacky!” 
“And filled with gambling and lounge singers and booze and buffets and strippers,” Lorelai adds on. “And we’re gonna paint the town an undecided as-of-yet color.” 
“You most certainly are not.” 
“Flight and hotel are booked, Shy Baldwin tickets have been procured, I think we are,” Lorelai tells her. “We can do a belated birthday dinner when we get back.” 
“But Lorelai-” 
“Bye, Mom!” 
***** 
Lenny’s phone rings in the middle of the night, and he turns from his computer to pick up. “Hello?” 
“Lenny!!!!!” 
He chuckles and sits back. “Rory. How’s Vegas?” 
“Vegas is nice. It’s all so nice.” 
“And someone’s had a few drinks,” Lenny grins.
“I have! I have had…three…and a half…martinis!” Rory tells him. “Just like Midge drinks them, in honor of her. Gin, dirty with two olives.” 
“Good girl,” Lenny says proudly. “I’m glad you’re having a good time.” 
“I have gotten the numbers of four guys,” Rory tells him. “Totally unsolicited.” 
“Well, what happens in Vegas…” 
“Stays in Vegas unless it’s you and then you’re banned from Vegas.” 
Lenny lets out a shout laugh, slapping his own knee. “Yes, yes, that’s very true. How does twenty-one feel?” 
“Good. It feels…it feels good. You know? I’m - I’m back at school and Mom and I are talking again and…and she and Luke are gonna for-real get married, and- and and who cares about Logan, right? Of all the things to be mad about! Of all the things to break up with someone over! Not disclosing that the elderly couple who live across the street work in the entertainment industry? What is that? Who does he think he is? Huh?” 
“A spoiled brat who doesn’t understand love,” Lenny tells her gently. “And that’s okay. Not everyone gets it, Kiddo.” 
“He was supposed to get it.” 
“I know,” Lenny commiserates. 
“I’m gonna end up alone,” Rory pouts. 
He chuckles gently. “You are so, so young. You have so many more chances to fall in love. You know, I didn’t meet Midge until I was in my thirties. I was pushing forty when we got married. And before she came along, after my divorce, I felt the way you feel. I had my shot, and there were no more to be had, and then…there she was. If a bitter old fool like me can find love after making a mess of his life, then you’re golden, Ponyboy.”
“It’s ‘stay golden,’” Rory corrects him.
“See? With a brain like yours, who can resist?” Lenny asks teasingly before growing serious again. “It’s okay to feel lonely sometimes. Everyone does. And I know as far as guys are concerned, you’ve been through the school of hard knocks, but the right person is out there. Give it time. You have so much.” 
“Lenny, you’re the best.” 
He smiles to himself. “You go have fun. Go flirt with some unsuspecting fratboy or something.” 
“Can you hug Midge for me?” Rory asks. 
“I will do that,” he promises. “G’night, Kiddo.”
“Night, Lenny.” 
 He hangs up and shakes his head, getting back to work.
***** 
They get home Sunday night, exhausted but happy, and Luke and Midge cook dinner for them at the Schneiders’ place. Rory doesn’t have any Monday classes this week, so she’s determined to crash early and sleep off some of her jetlag.
“And then a stripper threw his thong at Rory,” Lorelai says, regaling the small group with stories of their Vegas adventure. 
“That is so unhygienic,” Luke complains. 
“Your step-daughter-to-be got to see some stranger dick, you’re not supposed to like it,” Midge jokes, making everyone else laugh. 
Lenny nudges Rory gently at the dinner table. “Doin’ okay?” 
Rory nods and grins at him. “Yeah. I really appreciated what you said over the phone. It really helped put things in perspective, you know?” 
“Good. Breakups are hard, but it’ll be okay,” he tells her. 
“Have you heard from Logan at all?” Sookie asks, looking concerned. 
“No,” Rory admits. “I think - I think we really are done this time, you know? And it’s really for the best. I think we’re just- we think about life really differently.” 
“Sometimes, even though you love someone, you’re just not right for each other,” Midge says sympathetically. “But you’re smart, talented, and gorgeous. There is somebody right around the corner, you’ll see.” 
At that moment the door opens and closes and Jess’s voice rings out. 
“I’m not here!” he calls. “I just need a place to crash while I try to convince Andrew to carry my book in the bookstore in the worst town in the country!” 
Rory blinks owlishly, as Midge rolls her eyes and gets up to make him a plate.
END
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nonbayanary · 1 year
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sena & pitt headcanons!!!!  (also ft. hiruma and sena bonding over being pet owners)
sena found pitt starving on a sidewalk, and decided to adopt the abandoned kitten
at first, his parents were against it, bcs none of them knew jackshit about caring for pets, much less tiny baby pets
but sena’s parents were a little surprised, bcs sena never rlly asked for a lot of things as a kid. now that he’s not budging on his stance on the kitten, his parents have no choice but to agree
sena’s heart ached for the kitten, and he nursed her to health with a mixture of a vet’s help, nights upon nights of endless cat research on the internet, and asking hiruma for tips on caring for pets
yes, sena asked hiruma for tips
hiruma didn’t know whether to feel touched that sena trusted him, or to slap sena upside the head, bcs, “you idiot chibi, cerberus is a fucking dog, not a cat!”
but hiruma helps anyway. some books on how to take care of cats appear in sena’s bedroom, and to this day, sena doesn’t know where they came from
the kobayakawas also find pamphlets for cat services and cat-care products in their mailbox, despite not subscribing to any of those newsletters
the first few days when sena adopted pitt, he fed her fried fish
but when he finally dove face-first into his research, he switched to buying food and milk for kittens
it was the vet who taught sena how to bathe kittens, along with some videos
but sena still found it difficult how to remember all the new info, which led him to bathe pitt improperly. and she learned to hate baths
sena then started moaning and groaning abt this at team practice. he was so lost in his worries that he started making more mistakes in team scrimmages
and hiruma, finally having enough of sena’s shitty performance, suddenly visits sena on a weekend, and demands to see the kitten
and sena, perplexed, watches as hiruma starts fucking bathing the kitten with his own two hands.
with hiruma’s eidetic memory and a few hours of watching videos of ppl bathing cats, he knows what to do and what not to do by heart
so he starts teaching sena, complete with a colorful and creative myriad of profanities, on how to bathe cats properly
sena: hiruma-san... why would you help me with this?
hiruma, smirking evilly: because no one will fucking believe you if you told them anyway
sena: ...
sena: yeah okay, fair enough
gradually, pitt grew into a healthy kitten after a few months of love and care.
sena allows pitt to bite him. at first, it scared the shit outta sena, bcs kitten claws and fangs are needle-thin, and they fucking hurt like hell
but eventually, sena develops a tolerance for the pain, so when pitt’s teeth itch, he just lets her bite him
at first, pitt ate whatever sena fed her. but as months passed, she developed a pickiness for food. 
sena: pitt, i thought this was your favorite flavor!
pitt, sniffing the food, then trotting away: well, you were wrong!
pitt loves torturing and murdering cockroaches whenever she finds them at night
sena recounts this to hiruma, from one pet owner to another, and hiruma fucking laughs his ass off
hiruma, cackling: you fucking know that the scent of dying cockroaches attracts even more of those fuckers, right?
sena, completely fucking tired: yes, hiruma-san, i know. 
hiruma approves of the murder machine the tiny kitten has grown into
sena used to be afraid of cockroaches, but now he’s immune to them after seeing hundreds of their tiny corpses
at night, pitt curls up next to sena. sometimes, she wants to keep the body contact at a minimum, so their only point of contact is pitt’s tail loosely held in sena’s hand as he sleeps. sometimes, she wants cuddles, so she curls up on top of sena, his slow breaths lulling her to sleep
pitt loves sunbathing. during mornings and afternoons when sena’s at school, she climbs up to the roof, or just lays down on the kobayakawa’s front porch
pitt loves taking a shit on the kobayakawas’ garden, to the point where the whole family doesn’t blink an eye at the rancid scent of cat shit
sena sends hiruma pictures of dead cockroaches, with their torn body parts everywhere. hiruma, who is eternally laughing at sena’s suffering, keeps count of how many cockroaches pitt’s killed so far
petting pitt instantly brings sena so much joy. giving her affection relieves his stress, especially when he’s doing homework 
sena: pitt, you’re hungry again? but i just fed you! 
pitt, meowing: IRRELEVANT!
when sena tells hiruma about this, hiruma guffaws at the long-suffering look on sena’s face
hiruma: this motherfucker’s got an attitude! not bad!
sena, sighing: why do you relish in my suffering?
for all of pitt’s sass and attitude, sena would still take a bullet for her. 
whenever sena’s sad during team practice, hiruma sends him photos of pitt
and sena lights up everytime, however—
sena: hiruma-san, where did you get this photo of pitt? i don’t remember taking this photo
hiruma, evil grin slotting into place: that’s because you didn’t take that photo
sena:  ...
sena: nevermind, i don’t think i want to know
whenever sena changes his bedsheets, pitt loves jumping onto the bed and zooming around. it never fails to make sena laugh 
cerberus and pitt develop a friendship, borne out of a mutual respect
cerberus: i’ve killed mutts bigger than me. what about you, pipsqueak? you got a body count?
pitt, proudly: i’ve only killed cockroaches, but my body count is at 41
cerberus, very impressed: let me say this, from one murderer to another: you’re the only bitch i ever respected in this house
sena’s profile pic on social media is pitt. his phone’s gallery only has two kinds of pictures: sena in group photos w his american football peers, or photos of pitt. and most of them are the latter
sena starts printing pitt’s photos on polaroid film, and it soon fills two walls of his room
once, when hiruma and cerberus come over for some playtime between pitt and cerberus, hiruma sees the wall full of photos
hiruma: jesus fucking christ, it’s like a goddamn shrine in here
sena: i now understand why ancient egyptians used to worship cats. i would die for pitt
hiruma: calm the fuck down, edgelord
(hiruma’s a hypocrite, and he’s glad sena doesn’t call him out on it. they both know hiruma would take a bullet for cerberus too.)
when cerberus and pitt take a nap, they curl up against one another. both sena and hiruma take at least a hundred pictures from different angles. hiruma’s just more discreet about it
sena loves buying stuff for pitt, especially cat toys and cat beds. there are now several cat beds and rugs all over the kobayakawa household. a lot of them are blue, since that’s sena’s favorite color
pitt loves to sleep on sena’s laptop keyboard. to this day, sena’s still amazed that his laptop hasn’t broken down yet
hiruma’s nickname for pitt is actually “fucking armpit.” hiruma glorifies in the exasperated look on sena’s face whenever he says it.
sometimes, hiruma calls pitt “eyeshield 20.” bcs sometimes, when pitt’s having the zoomies, she’s faster than even sena.
whenever sena has nightmares, he takes his time to pet pitt to calm himself down. then, when he’s feeling a little better, he curls a hand around pitt’s tail, and goes back to sleep.
pitt’s collar is color blue. it has her name, and sena’s phone number printed on it.
during sena’s birthday, on the year he’s graduating from deimon, hiruma gifts him a cat bed for pitt. both sena and pitt love it, but it confuses sena to no end. it’s a customized deimon devilbats design, and sena doesn’t know how hiruma had it made. it becomes pitt’s favorite mini-bed.
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(yes, y’all can definitely use this prompt!!!  /srs)  
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