#GRRRR I LOVE THESE BOOKS

[iri-desky]

I JUST SAW THIS POP UP ON MY DASH AND I'M LIKE "PEOPLE ARE STILL TALKING ABOUT SPY SCHOOL"??? AND I SCREAMED

now that the “ they both reached for the gun” song is trending, im SO pissed that the spy school movies haven’t been made yet, because the amount of EDITS that could’ve been made to this song alone? INFINITE. The betrayal reveal in the first book. The reveal that joshua knew about Ben being a double agent in ESS. the scene where ben and murray both LITERALLY REACHED FOR A GUN in secret service. the scene with mrs e in SSBI. the betrayal scene in ssr (not the best moment in the fandom but still works) the scene where murray pushes ben off the boat in SSAS, and most recently the glacier scene in SSGN. WHY ARE THERE NO MOVIES IM TWEAKING

[coquelicoq]

[ID: Panels from chapters 95, 96, and 112 of Natsume's Book of Friends featuring the outfits of Taki Isamu. These include shirts or jackets picturing a bear, a shark, vertical writing, the shark again, a bomb with a lit fuse, a bird, and an alligator. All the animals have their mouth open in what could be anthropomorphically perceived as menace, except for the bird, which instead is side-eyeing the viewer in menace. The bomb also has an evil grin. /end ID]

all of isamu's canon outfits, featuring: animal, animal, writing, animal, BOMB????, animal, animal

[corvidaeconundrum]

Mini ref sheet of David for the AU/Fic! We will be making everyone elses very soon🫶 apologies for it being so empty though, couldn’t think of what exactly to add

Also now have a new summary for the story! \/

Cry of Monsters:

David Leatherhoff was a lot of things, an addict, a slob, a mess…but he was absolutely not a murderer. So when that ends up changing, he has a lot of feelings about it.

After an ill planned attempt on his life and a subsequent discovery, he finds himself in a world turned upside down, with the only person there to help being the same guy he could have sworn he just killed a month prior.

Aka: David becomes a modern day Franbow, and tries to keep as many people alive as possible while taking care of three very mentally ill teenagers. Will he succeed? Ehhhhhhh-

[tapeworm-loser]

No one else gonna care but here’s trans Angel Face + Narrator and Tyler

(Click for better quality)

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

Can we get some book recommendations by any chance? 🎤

OF COURSE!!!!! i made a little book rec post a while back, but i …. can’t find it :’) so. i’m just gonna mention a few of those same books again <333

if i had to narrow my list down, i’d say my favorite books atm are beartown, eureka street and kafka on the shore ….. i say that very hesitantly though because 1) my memory is very bad and it’s been a while since i read them 2) i have many books on my tbr that i think will shoot up the rankings…………..

but yeah!!!! beartown is … probably my favorite book of all time and i will recommend it to the ends of the earth. it’s very heavy though!!!! content wise. and it’s long. but like, really easy to read because you just get sucked up into it. it’s about a small town that stays alive through its hockey team!!! but it’s not really about hockey . more about culture in general. family, friends, sports — etcetc!! i would absolutely look up the cws for this one though because it did give me a crisis 😭 it’s a really devastating book. but it means the world to me. backman’s writing is sooo pretty and i applaud him for carrying swedish literature on his back because god knows most of it sucks 🙏🙏

eureka street is, at its core, a love story <3 with a lot of humour sprinkled in. but it takes place right at the end of the irish troubles, with bombings and death all around, and it paints … a very vivid picture of those troubles. right in the middle of the book it switches genre for a chapter and is like……. devastatingly detailed & grim. only to switch back immediately after. it gave me chills bc the book just. does suchhh a good job of showing how desensitized you get to war and conflict after a while . but again, it really is mostly a story about love!!! and wilson’s writing is soooooo gorgeous i was fuming with anger while reading because i was so jealous 💀

kafka on the shore is another looong one and it’s also super weird, murakami is a freak, i don’t like him, unfortunately his writing is also gorgeous . i could give you tws for this one but we’d be here for a while. cat beheadings, sexual assault (almost)(in a dream), fantasy incest? (maybe?)(maybe not?)(it’s up for interpretation), etc. it’s so weird. but that’s exactly why it makes for such a wonderful coming of age story……. murakami likes to play around with the line between fantasy and reality and i think he does it sooooo so well . if you enjoy magic realism you’ll probably enjoy this book. the vibes are also very tasty in general……. the writing 😔…………… (<- is jealous)

…… also . this is a poetry collection not a novel but i need to recommend war of the foxes at any given opportunity………. richard siken you are the love of my life…. his crush collection is suuuuuper good too but i think i prefer wotf just a teeny tiny bit

[boobxrry0]

Doomed yaoi

I drew my boys kissing because they deserve better than what i have in store for them 🙏 (completely original characters.) (Aries, a dragon, to the left, and Hugo, an angel, on the right.)

I will go crazy for them

[a-gay-little-cat]

what i also often think about is the rafen omnibus and the books about dante they have such fun little lore details, or hell even big ones like dante's whole journey from aspirant to battle brother

something that always makes me giggle to think about is the fact that according to mr swallow vampyr is one of those words that should not be spoken off in referral to blood angels they dont like it at all and then theres also the small part of mephiston tending to a garden up close or within dante's chambers that apparently holds plants from baalfora or their gallery in the arx angelicum, showing off pieces created by all the blood angels, their huge fridge to show off all the nice pictures they painted :]

[le-agent-egg]

As much as i love bitching about English class a lot of the novel studies we’ve done are actually really good books. Shoutout The Chrysalids and Life of Pi fr

[jymwahuwu]

Capitano has me grrrr so ill—

So the heat has been bad and you’re capitanos arranged marriage darling so naturally you fall ill. When u go to a doctor they confirm that you’re expecting a baby and you’re terrified to tell your husband lmao. You have no idea how he’d react so you tell and/or bribe the doctor to just tell capitano for you while you do your best to avoid him as best you can the rest of the day :3

Love this!! The flustered and shy you and the affectionate Capitano… now besides Tsaritsa he has someone to pledge his undying loyalty…🥺💕

cw: yandere, arranged marriage, creampie, pregnancy, fem reader

The marriage to Capitano was arranged - a mission. Your relatives have already been looking for a lifelong spouse for you when you reach adulthood. In the eyes of these traditional people, nothing is more important than marriage and childbirth. What you didn't expect was. An armored warrior slowly walked into your village with gifts, solemnly knelt down on one knee and proposed to you, asking them to marry you to him. Your relatives are shuddering.

Of course, they accepted his gift.

Capitano sent enough supplies for the entire village and set up a heating system to help them survive the winter. In exchange, he got his bride.

You've never met him before, but he seems to know every strand of your hair, every smile and worry.

Fatui? That's too far away for you. You have no deep understanding of his power. Full of confusion, you married him. Your husband is upright, aboveboard, and strong… He is not out of control or impulsive. Sex also seemed like a routine. Always advance in a careful and firm rhythm, and stretch your thighs for several hours until your vagina is swollen and dripping. This is how every battle ends. His balls ravaged your quivering petals, his thick glans pushing into the tight depths. He kissed your lips and the back of your hands intently, his warm breath blowing behind your earlobes.

Maybe he just needed an heir. You wonder in despair. Marriage may be romantic, but it's not yours.

You have recently lost your appetite, vomited, and your breasts are swollen. You start to wonder if this could be…?

Capitano tells you that you need his permission to go out. He is not stuffy and conservative. This is a measure to ensure your safety. You are sick and you just want to see a doctor. That's okay, but you still can't go out. The doctor treats you at the manor.

The doctor's diagnosis and treatment results confirm your concerns - you are pregnant, and a little life is growing inside you.

"P-please tell my husband for me," you plead quietly, sniffing. You don't know how Capitano will react.

The doctor readily agreed. For the next half day, you tried your best to avoid your husband, including hiding in the greenhouse, watering the flowers and plants, searching for a magazine "you are interested in but can't remember the name" in the reading room, practicing cooking, and exploring new ways to play TCG. Just as you were hiding in a corner of the library reading pregnancy books, a rush of footsteps approached. It's his leather shoes.

"Are you pregnant?"

Looking at him as if you were caught in the headlights, you covered your cheek with your book and answered vaguely. "Uh…maybe…"

"Are you pregnant?"

Question again. Even your vision was shaken, your waist was lifted, and Capitano lifted you with one hand. The deep scar on his face has now been replaced by affection, and his chest is roaring with joy, bathing in it. You lowered your head and lifted your legs off the ground, panicking. "You, please calm down…"

"…Sorry, I got carried away." He carefully placed you back on the ground, as if you were fragile porcelain, and then he took the back of your hand and kissed it as usual. Those deep blue eyes exuded energy, like twinkling stars in the dark night.

[m00nkeiki]

Remember in those romance books where the male main character growls "touch her and die." How would you feel about the monster trio (and Law) saying "touch her and die" but they growl while they say it?

H0i!!! Congrats on being my first anon!  This was really fun to think about! I will be honest, I barely dip my toes in romance books, buuut I do love me some protective blorbos who care for you lots!  I feel like in terms of playing the trope straight, it would definitely fit Luffy and Zoro. Meanwhile, Sanji and Law would word and say it differently, but they’ll still have the grit in the voice and say the classic phrase in a manner that fits them. Hence, I’ve varied the scenarios and dialogue a bit to match each character, but made sure they work in the vein of the trope~

Request: Touch Her and Die Featuring: Luffy, Zoro, Sanji, and Law; Fem Reader Content Warning: mildly violent diction, implied kidnapping/capture in Luffy's and Law's section (but can be interpretated otherwise), stalking/harassment in Sanji’s section (but he saves you dw).

Luffy

I think he would definitely say this with so much earnestness. Luffy cares for his loved ones so much that he would always rush to violence if there was the prospect of them getting hurt. If he holds these feelings for the friends he cares and cherishes for, imagine what he’d do for a lover.

Despite his brash mind, Luffy does not take the concept of death lightly: after all, it’s not in his nature to easily take a life as he prefers to disarm then defeat an opponent. Hence, if it meant protecting you, it would mean having to forgo his usual rule.

Before Luffy comes to your rescue, all hope seemed lost, as if you could have been swallowed in a pool of despair and darkness. Then, like daybreak, the Straw Hat Pirate arrives. He kneels down on you, to check if you’re okay. His expression is a blank kind of warmth, the one where he is trying to hold his emotions back to focus on ensuring your safety. You’ll know he’ll smile when the coast is clear and everyone is alright. No, not now. Not when you’re vulnerable like this.

After reassuring himself that you were safe, you could see how his usually bright wide eyes tense up, as if his irises are a blank dot in each of eyes. 

Then he turns his head to his opponent, marching forward as a humming grrrr emanates from his lungs. Luffy grits his teeth, his hands forming into fists that were sure to land a painfully harsh blow.

“You bastard.”

Luffy was trembling; not out of fear, but the forewarning that he could burst into a pour of punches that would break every bone in one’s body. The moment he speaks and growls, it’s gritty and low, a looming punishment for the enemy who could have hurt you.

“Touch her, and die.”

Zoro

He’s not training to be the greatest swordsman only because swordsmandry is his passion, but also because he wants to protect the friends who were precious to him, especially you. If he failed that promise, he would beat himself down for it. But Zoro cannot afford to fall into this pitfall. No, he’s got to keep training, keep fighting, keep pushing. If he reaches his limits, he’ll crack them open and surpass them. 

Even if he was well aware you too were a capable fighter, Zoro cannot help but have this little voice inside of him: what if he was too late? Thus, he promises that he will be there to shield you with his sword.

So when you were about to be the victim to an enemy’s lethal blow. Swift like the wind, Zoro deflects the incoming attack, glancing back to ensure you were alright. After creating a forceful X with his katanas as the enemy backs off, Zoro brandishes them, steel sharpening against steel to create a menacing threat.

Zoro is a demon: the kind you are grateful that you were his ally, friend, lover—instead of an fiend who would shed no mercy or forgiveness. You trusted that he was strong enough, that he would protect you at all costs even if the ends turn out ghastly and gory. 

One you heeded Zoro's yell to focus on getting to safety, you watched from afar to see him turn into the feared swordsman, the way he lets out a ghastly snarl as he became like a tiger, swords as claws about to prance.

“Oi, touch her…”

And in the next moment, he brandishes two of his katanas, a pierce of red from his open eye glaring into the person who dared hurt you. Growling like an oni boiling with fury, Zoro was determined to slash and slice the enemy who, if he had not come in the right moment, could have ended your life.

“and die.”

Sanji

Sanji will never stand for anyone laying a finger on his beloved. He always believed in kindness, to treat others right and to have empathy when they make difficult choices. But there were some acts that were simply unforgivable—especially if they were targeting you.

The blond cook, who always promised to safeguard you from all harms through the power of his martial kicks, sighted you one day as you were chased by a lecherous man. With the way you had forced your pace and let out anxious breaths, he could not stand for this. Nobody deserved this horrifying experience, for the lack of respect that came with stalking and harassment was disgusting in Sanji’s eyes, with the way his curled eyebrows furrowed. 

A knight in a tailored suit, Sanji dashes to your aid, running in kicks as he apprehends your stalker: It was one of the rare times he uses his hands as a threat—the way he grips the shoulder of your harasser, squeezing them tight as if he were to crack and break their flesh open. If not, he’ll kick upwards with his powerful legs to split their body in vertical halves.

At this moment, Sanji wishes he could instead rush past and hold you tight, to protect you from such cruelty of the world and whisper affirmations of safety. But first, he’s going to give your stalker an admonish.

“You shitty asshole. How dare you try to touch her…”

Sanji spat, with his voice evolving into a dark gritty tone as if he had smoked a hundred cigarettes beforehand. His grip tightening, you know he’ll keep his promise as your guardian and lover, and to the person who harassed you, a painful kickdown.

“And if you take one step further, you die.”

Law

Law has always been protective of you. He cares for you and your individual, and if you are adjacent to any kind of danger he will worry gravely. Law feels the utmost responsibility to keep you safe, because if there was even the slightest scratch on you, or a sense of unforgotten horror in your eyes, he will never forgive himself.

He also does not say the word “die” lightly. Following a doctor’s code, all life is sacred, and even with his callous streak when it comes to tormenting enemies, Law does not have it in him to kill. But when push comes to shove, when his loved one is in danger… Law may have to break that personal code.

Before anything, he has to prioritize saving you first. Once you hear him yell “Room!” then “Shambles!” you find yourself swiftly teleported to Law’s side, and you see how he was straining himself in his stance: the inked fingers of his right hand curled, the dark circles growing larger around his eyes… He’ll exhaust himself first before anything can happen to you.

Then he faces his opponent, the one who could have hurt you if Law was even a second late. Before the confrontation, Law tells you to get away from the battle before things get ugly. 

Law enjoys playing and messing around with his opponents, but not this time. Grabbing the hilt of Kikoku and ready to unsheathe it at any moment, Law gives the enemy an ultimatum.

“I’ll give you a choice. You can walk away right now, and I won’t mess with you.”

Then, his golden eyes seem to flash, a premonition of what will come if his advice is not followed.

“But if you are still thinking about touching her, even in the slightest…”

Then with a growl, he affirms: 

“then die.”

~~~

I hope you enjoyed anon! Until then—see ya!

For more works: First hug from the Monster Trio First hug from Ace, Sabo, and Law

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

Hello, I hope your having a nice day, can I request Yandere 1st Years + Grim (Platonic) with a Komi Reader? (From Komi can’t Communicate)

Reader’s known for being incredibly beautiful, intelligent, athletic and elegant in everything she does, however she has crippling Social Anxiety and ends up scaring everyone away with her ‘mean/scary’ look so everyone tends to avoid her (When it’s actually herself that’s nervous since she doesn’t know what to say)

Except for Ace, Deuce and Grim after they spent time with Reader in the mine, they discovered her anxiety she wrote it out so now they’re mostly the ones who do the talking for her and try to help her reach her goal of making 100 Friends in NRC, even though they both think that’s a ‘weird/bad goal’ because this IS NRC

Reader loves cats, so she spoils Grim and Lucius (The latter likes laying in her lap and even follows her around) with pets, treats and affection and helping her friends with studying since she gets perfect marks

How would they react to hearing Reader’s voice for the first time? Not to mention have Reader tell write out that she made a friend all by herself who visits her dorm at night and does nightly walks (You know who it is)

Komi-San Reader | Yandere Twisted Wonderland

You’re quiet and intimidating but not because others find you scary. The exact opposite, they’re obsessed. You’re athletic, you’re smart, you’re beautiful, you’re kind, and the list goes on. Without so much as opening your mouth, the school is at its hands and knees all for you. Little do they know about your silent struggle, not like your dearest first-year friends. More than anyone they know how hard you work and if their hearts could overfill with love for you it already has.  So imagine your stalkers' friends; reaction to you’re never heard before voice:

Ace Trappola

“Aw man, (Y/n) I can’t begin to explain how much of a pain he is! With his moodiness, we’re not going to win the game.”

“...”

“Don’t say that, I am great but not that great.”

“...Y-you c-can d-do it!” 

He plays 10x better 

All while running on his excitement and embarrassment

“Whoa, Ace! W-were you holding out on us!”

Everyone is floored that he’s suddenly just doing so well

He’s keeping your quiet cheers to himself 

Replaying it in his head

He will teasingly ask you for a recording even when you cutely shake your head

“Oi oi don’t get all shy now, you were doing so well!”

He does circle back having already written down the names of those who turned their heads

If they’re so inclined to hear your voice in a roaring crowd 

Then they should be alright with their ears no longer working 

He’s being merciful when he does just this

And if you mention any mysterious friends, he’d no doubt try to follow up on that same treatment

Deuce Spade

“M-maybe being an honor student was too high of a goal.”

You shake your head

“Ahh I appreciate it, (Y/n) but if I’m going to flunk again I’ll be in trouble. Both with Riddle and my mom, I just can’t measure up. ”

“You…are a good student.”

He blushes 

“G-g-g-g-good j-job (Y/n)!”

He knows how much this is taking for you to try 

But he just can’t keep it together 

He’s among the first to hear your precious voice

He has to be the only one

He doesn’t know what this feeling is but he doesn’t want to share

It especially rubs him the wrong way when you mention a mysterious friend 

He decides to wait it out

See who this new friend he’s going to gut he has to meet

Epel Felmier

“Grrrr I can’t stand it! Why can’t I be taken seriously? I just hate my face!”

“...”

“Don’t hafta lie ta me, (Y/n)! I know I’m not handsome.”

“...I….th-th-”

“Huh?” 

“I think you’re handsome.”

“Aw shucks, (Y/n)!”

He definitely wasn’t was expecting that

You’re just the sweetest as he predicted

He already keeps the notebook you’ve lost+ gone through with your written words

And the apple cores he lovingly retrieves from Ramshackle’s trash no doubt cultivating whatever ends up growing from them

He avoids the impulse to tear his book open at the mention of a new friend 

Well I hope they like a poison-apple

Jack Howl 

“I have a magift practice later on…are you still going to come?”

You nod your head

“T-thank you, I’d appreciate your support from the stands.”

When he says that he doesn’t expect you to actually whisper anything out

“G-go Jack!”

His keen ears pick it up and suddenly he’s breezing through obstacles like never before

And of course, he did his mate practically cheered him on

It makes it much earlier to replay that encouragement when he’s fighting for your honor his ownership of you

No doubt Savvannclaw is filled with your admirers

But some are a little too bold

So leave it to your mate to take action first

And while he’s at it he might as well guard your home more intensely

Sebek Zigvolt

“WHAT A MARVEL HUMAN! YOU’VE TAMED ALL THE FERAL FELINES ON CAMPUS!” 

“...”

“WELL FOR A HUMAN IT IS DECENT WORK! PERHAPS YOU DO HAVE–”

“C-can you please be quiet?”

“...?....!..Y-you think y-you, a mere human, can tell me what to do?!” 

Yes you can, having the loud half-fae go down two whole octaves was a feat

And he keeps replaying the moment in his head specifically the way your lips moved

Burning hot all over he’s not really listening to anyone for the next week month

But once he’s broken out of it he’s determined to repeat the miracle

And it seems it works best if your alone?

Then he’ll be sure to chase off the gaggle of scum+ admirers who you claim to be friends with

And he thinks nothing of a midnight friend…that is if you’re alone with them than that’s completely unacceptable

Grim

“Henchhuman! Everyone is soooo mean! Why doesn’t anyone like me? I know I’m so cool and maybe that’s why–”

“I like you.”

“Well of course you w–W-wait did you speak? T-t to me! Whoopee, I’m going to tell everyone the great Grim is who you spoke to first!” 

He runs off to do just that 

Bragging to anyone who would listen

He has to dodge a lot of assassination hits that day

But it gives him the content whenever that icky feeling comes up sometimes

And as for your ‘Hornton’ friend he’s seen him and next time he comes around he’ll boast all about his greatness and how you spoke to him

[arc-misadventures]

What Are Those: In some stories, due to their nature, dragons seek, avoid and attack certain places/objects. Fire dragons seek anything and anywhere that gives heat, Ice dragons avoid said heat while Holy dragons attack anything that's impure. We know Jaune seeks precious gems. Is there anything that he would avoid and attack?

I Am A Creature of Stereotypes, Evidently

Ruby: Okay… here’s one for you: “The more I take the more I leave behind.”

Yang: Uhhh… Air?

Ruby: Nope.

Yang: Crap.

Weiss: Dirt?

Ruby: Also no.

Weiss: What?

Jaune: Foorsteps.

Ruby: Correct! Okay, next one: “If two is a company, and three is a crowd, what is four, and five.

Weiss: Four is a quartet right?

Ruby: Yes, but that’s not the answer.

Weiss: What?

Blake: It makes sense, five is a pentagon, I don’t think that works as an answer.

Ruby: Nope~!

Yang: Then what is it?

Jaune: Nine.

Ruby: Correct!

Weiss: What? That doesn’t make any sense?

Yang: Four, and five… equals nine…

Weiss: That’s a stupid answer!

Ruby: Okay next riddle! “Iron roof, glass walls. Burns, and burns, but never falls.”

Blake: Iron roof, and glass walls?

Weiss: Never falls…

Yang: Is it a…?

Jaune: A lantern.

Ruby: Correct!

Yang: What?!

Blake: How does he keep doing this?’

Ruby: “I have rivers without water, forests without trees, mountains without rocks, and towns without houses.”

Yang: So it’s an image then? It has those things, but it doesn’t have them…

Weiss: Oh! Its a…?!

Jaune: A map.

Weiss: A map?! Gods dammit?! I had it!

Blake: That’s one to us! Right?

Ruby: Mmmm… neither of you get the point.

Yang: Dammit.

Ruby: Okay… Oh here’s a good one!

Ruby: Ahem: “I begin eternity, and end space. At the end of time, and in every place. Last in life, second to death. Never alone. Found in your breath. Contained by earth, water or flame. My grandeur so awesome. Wind dare not tame. Not in your mind. Am in your dreams. Vacant to Kings, present to Queens.”

Weiss: Huw…?

Blake: That is a good one…

Yang: It would be better if I knew the answer?!

Jaune: The letter ‘E.’

Ruby: Correct!

Weiss: Oh come on?!

Blake: Already?!

Yang: How is the letter ‘E’ the fucking answer?!

Jaune: Simple: The answer is found when you think literally, not metaphorically.

Yang: Eh?

Weiss: ‘End of Time.’ Time ends with the letter ‘E.’

Blake: ‘Vacant in kings, present in queens.’ Queen has the letter, ‘E’ in it, and kings doesn’t…

Yang: …

Yang: I hate riddles…

Ruby: Ah-ha… H-Here’s an easy one: ‘What kind of ear cannot hear?’

Weiss: A deaf one?

Ruby: No.

Weiss: How is that not the answer?!

Yang: Ear hair…?

Ruby: Eww, gross!

Yang: But, am I wrong…?

Ruby: Yes, yes you are wring.

Yang: Shit!

Blake: Uhhh…? A… A…?

Weiss: You have no idea do you?

Blake: No…

Ruby: Haa… Jaune?

Jaune: An ear of corn.

Ruby: Correct!

Weiss: Oh?! Give me that book!

Ruby: What… hey?!

Weiss: Okay, Jaune here’s one for you: “He who makes me doesn’t want me, he who buys me doesn’t need me, he who uses me doesn’t care.”

Jaune: A casket.

Weiss: What!! How did you… grrrr! Never mind. Next riddle! “I run through hills; I veer around mountains.I leap over rivers, and crawl through the forests. Step out your door to find me.” What is it…?!

Jaune: Roads.

Weiss: Okay…?! Let’s continue shall we…?!

Yang: I think we should take that book away from her.

Blake: I’m afraid she’ll bite me if I try…

Weiss: Okay… “I am a portal to another world, I can take you to places unseen, but I require no magic spell to open. What am I?”

Jaune: A book.

Weiss: MOTHER FU…?!!!

Yang: We’re in public, Weiss! Don’t scream your head off!

Juniper: Oh my? What’s going on by on here?

Ruby: I was just asking my team some riddles, and I think, Weiss is angry that he keeps on answering the riddles. I’m not really sure though.

Blake: Probably has to deal with the speed of which he is answering them too. I mean, here’s a riddle for you, Jaune: “I have a heart that never beats, I have a home but I never sleep. I can take a man’s house and build another’s. And I love to play games with my many brothers. What am I?”

Jaune: The king of hearts.

Blake: Correct.

Weiss: You didn’t even fucking think about it?! You’re cheating!

Blake: And, that’s why, Weiss is upset.

Ruby: I think it’s more so to do with her pride of not answering any herself.

Blake: Probably.

Juniper: Ahh you silly girls; You asked a dragon to play a game of riddles. You were bound to lose eventually, Jaune is a master of riddles. It’s honestly a little scary.

Jaune: What’s scary about my love for riddles?

Juniper: Nothing really, It’s just weird overall.

Jaune: And, why is that?

Juniper: No reasons. Now girls, let me give you the ultimate riddle for, Jaune! Okay, Jaune sweetie; “What have I got in my pocket?”

Blake: That riddle from that book?

Weiss: Then that means that the answers a…!

Jaune: A condom.

Blake: A ring! Wait, what?!

Yang: You’re kidding me… That’s not the answer.

Ruby: Is he right?

Juniper: H-How did you know?!

Weiss: HE’S RIGHT?!

Yang: Seriously.

Jaune: I can smell the latex.

Blake: You know what a condom smells like?

Jaune: She waved them in my face for an hour when she was showing me ‘how’ to use them. I remember that smell…

Juniper: And, that is good so you remember how to have safe sex.

Jaune: You told me not to use them because it, and I quote: “Condoms cut off the circulation to my penis, and make it fall off. So don’t use them.” End quote. So knowing that girls: “Why does my mom want me to use a condom?”

Ruby: To actually have safe sex?

Yang: Yeah, I mean you’ve already done it with a few girls. Hopefully me too… You don’t want them to end up pregnant, and ruin their careers now do you?

Jaune: Wrong.

Weiss: Those answers make complete sense.

Blake: How is that wrong?

Jaune: Simple: Mom punched a hole into the tip of the condom with a pin, rendering them useless.

Ruby: That’s not why you’re giving him those condoms now is it?

Juniper: Dammit, I’ve become predictable…

Ruby: W-W-What…?

Yang: Wait seriously?!

Blake: Talk about baby fever…

Weiss: Thank goodness you used a working one when you slept with my mom. Right, Jaune?

Ruby: Wait, You did sleep with her mom?!

Yang: I thought that was just a wild rumour?! You actually did it?!

Jaune: Uhhh…

Weiss: Y-You used protection… R-Right, Jaune…?

Jaune: Well, you see…

Weiss: Jaune… did you use protection…?

Jaune: I’m not saying she… But, I’ll take responsibility… Okay?

Weiss: Ahh… I see…

(Thud!)

Ruby: Weiss?!

Yang: Great, she fainted again…

Blake: Wait… You slept with, Weiss’s mother?! How the hell did that happen?!

Jaune: She discovered a new kink for me, and I lost it… okay?

Yang: What new kink?!

Jaune: I’m not answering that!

Juniper: So… does that mean grand babies…?

Jaune: Uhhh…?

Juniper: Grand babies~?

Jaune: Oh no…

[willicemisc]

chemicals in the lake are making the cats GAY >:(

Basically a masterpost about this specific AU

-Lionblaze transman, autistic and won't pick up any social cue.

-Lionblaze is not a calico, he is a chimera

-Lionblaze big guilt and OCD over his power

-Lionblaze fears he will end up like Scourge as a part of his OCD (i have to find a way to let everyone know that Scourge is related to Firestar tho....)

-Lionblaze and Toadfoot only aknowledge each other in The Fourth Apprentice when they are on their way to the beavers and they become gay

-Lionblaze keeps his personality from late po3 (kind of dumb, can't pick up any clue, very ocd, is socially very awkward and clumsy, clearly needs help to navigate social situations properly)

-Lionblaze is very much the same as in canon, very flawed, he is still the most forgiving of the 3 and does try to talk it out with Squirrelflight and Leafpool, he feels very isolated in his clan due to the prophecy, the lies around his birth and Hollyleaf being presumed dead, which makes him more prone to have a relationship with an outsider instead of a thunderclan warrior

-Toadfoot also went through losing a sibling (Marshkit), he doesn't have a canonical father so I think he would be very attached to his mom (Tallpoppy) and remaining sibling (Applefur), he is also seen being playful, friendly and understanding towards Flametail I love toadfoot

-Lionblaze and Toadfoot have big rivals to lovers energy and it was my favorite weird "crack" ship when I was 13

-The AU also centers around the flaws of StarClan and their weird mechanic that keeps changing over time (ashfur goes to starclan because he just found his way there, and leafpool gets to go through a whole trial somehow???)

-Living cats and StarClan fight dark forest first, and then living cats turn more or less against StarClan for being as incomprehensible as possible, doing blatant favoritism, letting bad seeds get in and throwing out overall good cats, and the warrior code will also be reformed because it's way overdue grrrr

-Maybe Dovewing and Ivypool are the babies of Hollyleaf and Cinderheart instead of Birchfall and Whitewing ? I never really liked that Dovewing was indeed linked to the 3 but she was so far away in family tree tbh :((

-Lionblaze will have babies with Toadfoot as some point (Maybe adopted ? I don't know yet) and they won't have many children, and I will do everything in my power to get rid of all the current incest in the books >:(

-I think the babies of Lionblaze and Toadfoot will look like Tallpoppy and Leafpool because i love them

-Leafpool, Squirrelflight and Tallpoppy will both be aware of the relationship at some point, but they will keep their mouth shut and be supporting mothers because they are very cool and progressive

-I don't know if I will ever write fanfiction about this, I am already working on a clangen project, so if I do anything about it it will only be a small side project ! I use this AU to rewrite things that make me happier than the canon version (like making transman OCD autistic lionblaze, i find it easier for me to relate to him) :)

I hope you like it, I shall disappear again for a while now, I have art fight attacks to work on >:)

[kalied0skull]

WHY ARE thHEY SO MEAN TO M&M

MY BABY LEAVE HIM ALONE☹️☹️☹️

#justice for movie and book m&m

MY BAAAABGYYYYH ... god i love m&m so much se hinton did not hold back on bullying that little kid 😭

he's just a tiny guy who loves peace your honor ... he wants nothing more than to look into his bag of m&ms and feel a little bit free ...

i have so many thoughts on m&m that i just cannot express rn but grrrr i love him so much

[sparkel-dog]

I only just now listened to that fan Mimic Jackie’s Box song, which everyone was memeing on for being bad. I had avoided it because “I haven’t read the book, spoilers”. I was RIGHT to avoid it because yes there is a spoiler in the song (I thought it would be fine since I got 2/3 of the games endings but no I still got spoiled. grrrr) but whatever

People are right it was funny song with… insane choices? for the line deliveries. But also it fucking reminded me of GROUNDBREAKING. a person who made a toooon of fnaf songs like 10 years ago, back when the series was brand spankin new. And everyone liked their songs (Hell i enjoyed a few of them as a kid) but like. Have you ever relistened to those songs once youre past the age of 12? because its the same exact fucking vibes as whatever the hell i just listened to, only the jackies box song had admittedly way more chaotic energy and also edgy swearing. But like. groundbreaking had lyrics that were annoyingly simplistic just describing the character very basically. “my name is bonnie, im the big purple bunny, i play guitar in a band, dont you forget who i am”. or otherwise making up random headcanons about the animatronics and slapping it into their songs (like. mangle having this weird verse about how they apparently dont feel the same way as foxy or the other animatronics, and not really knowing about the guy who made them hurt… which makes no sense because mangle has a child spirit in her too? Or the chica one needlessly putting two bad bitches against each other by having og chica sing about how shes better than toy chica when they’ve never really interacted, lol)

Not to just needlessly bully some fans for having less than stellar fanworks (really these people have thousands of subscribers and are fine though) it’s just interesting to talk about. Fnaf fan songs sometimes get a bad rap and i feel like its because fnaf is so POPULAR and it really sort of introduced a new wave of people making fansongs for games. Before that, there were minecraft parodies, but fnaf was really one of the first examples I can think of people making ORIGINAL songs for. It isnt a coincidence that a lot of the same people who made old minecraft song parodies kinda helped to popularize fnaf fansongs too (like tryhardninja or natewantstobattle). Of course living tombstone really popularized it, but after fnaf i feel like it became a lot more popular for people to make fan music about other games they loved too, especially similar indie dev horror games like bendy and the ink machine or stuff like that.

And because fnaf was so popular and a lot of people were first dipping their toes into the art of creating music, especially kids and teens… of COURSE a lot of fnaf fan songs arent masterpieces or are overly bland/mediocre lyric wise. It makes sense that a lot are just kinda trying to capture the fnaf vibe by describing a character or something instead of having lyrics that make you Think. And thats fine! this is art we’re talking about, it just needs to be created and exist and it doesnt have to be a masterpiece

….but also dont let that kid you into thinking that all fnaf fansongs are garbage or bland. there are soooo many artists who have fantastic fnaf songs, either lyric wise or because they do something interesting with the instrumentals. I wont mention living tombstone because theyre so popular everyone knows them… but My favorites were nathan sharp/natewantstobattle’s music (Made fnaf music for years and always had interesting lyrics, especially as he made more songs and started Connecting the lyrics of the songs together. My favorite by him was stay the course, which has a verse where they parallel lyrics from his first song mangled which is cool) ,Dagames has songs that are so badass legit metal that are fuckin earworms (moving up in the world is my favorite fnaf song of all time, even being one of my favorite overall songs of all time. Fantastic mashing of 8bit 80s retro funky vibes with cool rock. or check out close to home if you just want the coolest song hes made) and dhuesta is really addictive especially when it’s dhuesta’s music paired with dawko’s angellic singing voice lol. You would never believe me if i told you that “the dawko self insert oc songs where his indulgent self insert character gets possessed by glitchtrap are fucking BANGERS” but they are. same for any of their fazbear frights songs (Into the pit, out of stock and fetch are SO GOOD). I want to keep rambling about fnaf music i love but will call it there lmao.

anyways. i lovd fnaf and i love music and i love fans expressing themselves through music, whether its badly done or a masterpiece 👍

[causeimcrayzeebee]

could we have some hasemura headcanons??

oooo mwahaha of course of course!! great way to start off the new year! these are gonna be very fluffy n self indulgent but hey that’s how hyperfixations be

hasegawa n kamimura totally move in together in a universe where they both make it out of the killing game alive

kamimura n hasegawas sister would be lowk besties,,, she’d tell him embarrassing things about hasegawa and he’d casually bring it up at random times

absolutely projecting but these two are the WORST people to watch tv and movies with; hasegawa will comment every few minutes to correct something the movie portrayed wrong and kamimura will constantly judge the characters for their actions and point out a better solution. they never shut up during movies.

there’s no way these mfs haven’t been cuddling in each others rooms

they stand up for each other when their needs aren’t being met!!!!!

they play board n trivia games a LOT, kamimura knows he’s gonna lose but keeps doing it anyways cause hasegawa always enjoys himself

kamimura is pretty good at eyeliner but usually doesn’t do a whole lot; sometimes he does try to do more out there makeup looks with hasegawas encouragement

hasegawa is so addicted to kamimuras laugh that he sometimes purposefully does or says things to get a giggle out of kamimura

hasegawa asked hayashi to help teach him how to make some of the things kamimura enjoyed eating in Restaurant, like the miso soup, so that he can be able to make it for him

kamimura teaches hasegawa how to skateboard

they would be members of their local aquarium n all the workers know them by now cause it’s such a common date spot of theirs

they’d have stupid nerdy matching shirts

they share those chemistry coloring books

ugh i love them so much,,, too bad they’re too doomed for most of this to happen! um anyways pls share any of your hasemura headcanons I LOVE headcanons so much grrrr