#God do I owe them my life I'm so fucking thankful for them holy shit

[plztumb1rhelpmegetoveranxiety]

Hiiiiiiii which of these look better?

[resi4skz]

Title: Starstruck (pt1)

Pairing: Chan!idol x Fem!reader

Enjoy!

Part 2 , Part 3

"The usual place?" Luna asks as I finish up decorating a cake that was due tomorrow.

"Yeah. Erica and Julie wants to go there too. Just make a reservation for," I glance at my watch. "5pm."

As she makes the reservation on the phone, I glue the white and pink fondant petals on the 2 tier cake with edible glue. It was a cute and simple cake for a 1yr old. Turning the cake turntable, I admire my work before placing it in the fridge for pickup tomorrow. "Hey, so he uploaded a video again."

I haven't turned around so fast in my life. I quickly walk over to her as she hands me her phone. Excitedly, I press play on the tiktok page she had left me. Music comes on as a man in a white skin tight full sleeve top and baggy pants comes on. He dances, showing his dance skills. I had been following him ever since he had 2 videos on his page. Now he has millions followers and loads of comments under each video.

The only downside? He wears a helmet in each one so no one really knows who he is. He's usually seen roaming the city of Seoul or videos like the one I'm watching. "Good lord, woman. You're starstruck."

I give the phone back and clean up the kitchen quickly. Sound comes from her phone and I start singing along the song 'Star Lost.' It's a song I always listen to when I need some cheering up. It's from the kpop group Stray Kids, a very popular boy group all around the world. Luna and I had always wanted to go to one of their concerts but with owning a bakery and orders piling on, we never had the time. But we both followed them on their instagram and bubble. Although I only had one bubble, the leader, the one and only Bang Chan.

After dinner, the four of us went our separate ways as we lived in different areas in the city. But I decided to stop by Han river to take a night stroll. It was nice this time around as it was getting a bit warm. Smiling, I close my eyes to feel the warm breeze of summer approaching.

I resume walking, enjoying the sound of the waves. There weren't many people around as it was pretty later and I liked that, less people to worry about. My phone buzzes as I approach a corner.

L: are you home yet?

As I'm about to reply, I walk into something. Or someone. "Ah, I'm sorr-"

My words stop in my throat as I blink at the person in front of me.

Am I seeing things?

I rub my eyes. He's wearing biker gear this time. But no helmet? I blink a few times at the back of his head. What is he doing here? It's when he turns around is the biggest surprise of my life. The black curly hair, the sharp jaw and those lips. I definitely know those lips. When my land on his eyes, I let out the biggest gasp. "You're....you're....."

"Shhh!" He says, putting his finger to his lips as he glances around. "Shit, I didn't expect for my identity to go this way."

"Holy shit. You're Bang Chan AND the biker dude?!"

Sighing, he closes his eyes, nodding his head. "Yes."

"Okay. I need to sit down. Or pinch myself," I said, transfixed at the man in front of me. "This is a dream, right?"

He laughs softly, his dimples popping. Oh my god. His dimples. "You're definitely not dreaming." He reaches up and pinches my arm.

I flinch, hissing at the sharp pain. "Ow!" Okay. Definitely not dreaming. "But what are you doing here?"

"I was trying to find a spot to film a tiktok."

"Right."

I watch him fiddle with the zipper of his biker jacket. "May I?" I asked, stepping closer to him. Once he nods, I place my hands at the front of his jacket and.....holy fuck he smells so good. Mentally cursing at myself, I pull the zipper down and step back.

"Thanks."

"You're welcome," I replied smiling.

His phone buzzes and he pulls it out of his biker pants, turning around to take the call. After a few seconds, I take it as a sign to leave. As I'm scrambling my brain whether to tell Luna about what just happened when I feel a tap on my shoulder. Turning around, it's him again.

"Damn, you walk fast," he pants, his helmet dangling around his hand.

"Uhm, did something happen?" I asked, concerned.

"No, but," he fishes out phone again. "I wanted to ask a question."

"Okay..."

"Would you want to come to our concert?"

I almost choked on my spit. "W-what?"

"Our concert? It's this weekend."

"No. I heard you. Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why do you want me to go to your concert?" He gives a shrug to my question. "Is it to bribe me so I don't tell everyone about you?"

He gives another shrug and I laugh. "Oh my god, it is!"

"Look," he begins. "I can't have this going out otherwise my company won't let me hear the end of it."

Which was true because his company was shit. "Okay."

We exchange phone numbers. I stare at my phone with his number. Holy cannolli. I have Bang Chan's number. "I'll text you the details for the concert. Make sure to come to the backstage, yeah?"

"Okay."

"Alright, well, see ya," he says with a wink before putting on his helmet and sprinting away.

A little later when I'm home getting ready for bed, my phone chimes. Thinking it's Luna, I pick it up but freeze when I see the name on the screen.

C: did you get home okay?

Y/N: yes, was just getting ready for bed

C: oh? It's only 11pm

I snort at his text.

Y/N: only you would think it's early but I have been up since 5am and would like a 10hr nap with no interruptions

As soon as I hit send, my phone rings loudly making me jump. "Jesus." But it's him calling. "Hello?"

"A 10 hour nap? That's not a nap."

"It is for me."

"You're one weird woman but I like you."

My heart skips a beat. "Sure. Everyone likes me. You'd like my cakes too."

"Cakes?" He asked.

Ah, right. "I own a bakery with my friend, Luna."

"Maybe I'll come by sometime to taste your cake."

"Wait," I blink at his words. "You want to come to my bakery?"

He chuckles, music to my ears. "Why is that so surprising?"

"I mean," I began. "It's not everyday I get to hear that THE Bang Chan would visit my bakery."

"Alright, well I'll let you go."

I dream about a biker thay night.

--------------------------------------------------------------

The following night, he invites me for coffee. Then later we're back at Han River again, walking and talking. After a few minutes, we reach his bike and he grabs his helmet. Gosh. How is the little things he does I find very attractive?

The next few seconds go by fast, my brain not comprehending what happened. I feel something soft and wet on my right cheek, eyes widened as I reach to touch when he steps back. Did he just....

"Let me drop you home?"

I could only nod as I suddenly didn't have the ability to speak. And as I sit behind him on the bike, I was having trouble finding a spot to hold onto when he grabs my hand and puts them around his waist. "That's much better," he says starting the bike. And we were off.

By the time he reached my apartment complex, I'm still stuck on the kiss he gave me on the cheek. "Y/N?"

"Huh?" I snap my eyes at him as I see him with his hand out for me to climb off the bike. "Oh!"

"So, Y/N."

"Y-yes?"

"Will I see you again?"

Is he talking in a sense of a date? Wait, he's asking ME on a date???? "At the concert?"

"And after," he said.

"After?" I blink, my brain going in overdrive.

"Yeah, I wanna take you out," he replied.

"Are you asking me out on a date?"

"Yes," he chuckles.

"But we just met."

He takes a step closer and tucks my hair behind my ears. What is happening? "Yeah. It's not everyday everybody gets star struck."

Holy moly. His brown boba eyes are so pretty. I can check off many things on my bucket list with him being number 1. "But you're an idol. And I'm just a normal human who works in a bakery."

"So?"

"So, wouldn't it be weird for you to go out and be bombarded by paparazzi?"

"Good point," he nods. "But I have my ways, sweetheart."

Sweetheart. Bang Chan just called me a sweetheart. "Right. I forget you know almost everyone in the industry."

"It's a curse."

"What? Hello? It's not a curse. If I was like you, I wouldn't have trouble with social anxiety," I exclaimed. "I wouldn't give a fuck about anyone saying anything to me then."

He snorts, laughing. "You're so cute."

"Hey!"

"Sorry, sorry," he says. "But it's a fact that I do know everyone and everything."

"See? You get it. While my introverted mind can't even fathom being in crowds," I huff, crossing my arms. When my eyes meet his, he's staring at me with such fire in his eyes. I squirm on my spot. "What?"

"Nothing. Just wondering if I should come up and show you what an extrovert can do or just leave before I do something drastic."

I visbly gulp. Holy shit, Christopher. "Uhm."

But he just smiles at me and wears his helmet with the visor up. "I'll see you at the concert?"

"Yeah."

He gets on his bike, revvs it up a bit then he turns around and winking at me before driving away.

When I'm settled in bed, nice and cozy, my phone buzzes. "Luna if this is yo-" But my eyes widen at the name popping up.

C: sweet dreams, babygirl ;)

I cannot wait for the concert.

[certainlynotasimp]

I bring forth many more incorrect Sunny and Migs quotes!

-

Miguel: Is something burning?

Sunny, leaning seductively on the counter: Just my desire for you.

Miguel: Sunny, the toaster is literally on fire.

-

Miguel: Do you want to explain the text you sent me last night?

Sunny: It was autocorrect.

Miguel: Autocorrect wrote "You're so hot. Please step on me."?

Sunny: Yes.

-

Miguel: I owe you one.

Sunny: That’s ok. You can just date me and we’ll call it even.

-

Sunny: That was so hot, Miguel.

Miguel: I literally called the person who just flirted with you a degenterate dog and told them I hope they get dragged through the streets.

Sunny: I'm so in love with you.

-

Sunny: Since we're in a relationship now, your clothes are my clothes too. Don't ask me why I have your shirt on, this is our shirt.

Miguel, joking: Fine, but when I come strutting in with your fuzzy socks I don't want to hear shit.

-

[When Miggy and Sunny finally get engaged, to the rest of the spider crew]

Miguel: We’re getting married, bitches!

Sunny: And we're about to make it everybody else's problem.

-

Miguel: I’ve been dropping them the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. No response.

Sunny: Wow. They sound stupid.

Miguel: But they’re not. They’re really smart actually. Just dense.

Sunny: Maybe you need to be more obvious? Like, I don’t know… “Hey! I love you!”

Miguel: I guess you’re right. Hey Sunny, I love you.

Sunny: See! Just say that!

Miguel: Holy fucking shit.

Sunny: If that flies over their head then, sorry Miguel, but they're too dumb for you.

Miguel: Sunny...

-

Sunny: I truly go into housewife mode when I'm someone's soulmate- like, I'll make you pancakes and bacon every morning.

Miguel: This is a lie.

Miguel: I'm literally dating them. This is a lie.

Miguel: THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO COOK A PANCAKE, WHAT IS THIS.

-

Miguel: I want to be with you for the rest of my life.

Sunny: Damn, that sounds like a marriage proposal.

Miguel, getting down on one knee: That's 'cause it is.

-

Miguel: I like your new pants!

Sunny: Thanks, they were 50% off!

Miguel: I’d like them better if they were 100% off. *winks*

Sunny: The store can’t just give away clothes for free.

Miguel: That’s… not what I meant.

Sunny: That’s a terrible way to run a business, Miguel.

-

Miguel walking into the kitchen and seeing all their limes peeled: Sunny, I love you but, what the h-e-double FUCK.

Sunny, sipping coffee happily: I love you too :)

-

Sunny: Miguel and I are no longer dating.

Miguel: Sunny, that’s a horrible way of telling people we’re married.

-

Sunny: Hey, wanna take a shower with me?

Miguel: I have a gun in that nightstand beside the bed. If I ever say no to that question, I want you to take it out and shoot me. Because I’ve obviously gone crazy.

-

Miguel: My future partner must be brave, strong, intelligent, successful and organized.

Sunny: *steps on a caterpillar and proceeds to drop to their knees and sob while apologizing profusely*

Miguel: That one. I want that one.

-

Sunny: Are we fighting or flirting?

Miguel: I'm pinning you against a wall with my hand around your neck-!

Sunny: Your point?

-

Miguel: I am so cool. I am an absolute Chad. I am the epitome of coolness and awesomeness—!

Sunny: Hi.

Miguel: *melts down in a flustered heap of softness*

-

Miguel: We should get you to a doctor for a check up immediately. What if it happens again, and there isn’t anyone around to help you? What if it’s congenital? Oh my God! Was it me? Did I hurt you?

Sunny: …You realize any other person that made their partner pass out in bed would simply feel really proud of themselves, right?

I’m not even gonna add on to this glorious post other than I’m proud🥹

[lu-sn]

ranking kp characters by how much they deserve to be the one to shoot korn in the head 🤍

honorable mentions: chay and macau, who might not quite have the skills to pull it off, but who would CERTAINLY rise to the occasion if sufficiently prompted

7. kinn

now, if this were a list of who needed korn to be dead the most, kinn would be much higher up on this list. poor kid. so completely gaslit. but he probably deserves to NOT be the one shooting korn, on account of the very fun i-killed-my-dad trauma he'd have to pile on top of the my-dad-is-dead trauma. so someone else should just take one for the team here 😂

6. pete

i don't think pete would derive any sort of great joy from killing korn. but he would also be totally ready to do it if, say, vegas indicated in literally any way that he wanted that. or if vegas was in danger. the reason pete deserves to do is simply that vegas would find it SO hot and would eat his ass SO GOOD for it. and pete always deserves to get his brains fucked out silly 🥺

5. kim

because it would be hot 🔥 and he'd make it look sick

ok but actually it's because kim probably has the most rage stored up regarding how fucking unfair it is for him and his big brothers to be trapped in this terrible puppet play for the rest of their lives. and he deserves to free himself and his big bros! let out all that rage! it's healthy!!! and it would be very hot

4. khun

this one's hard. how much khun deserves it is directly related to his backstory, and how he got kidnapped, and whether korn intended to push him out of the heir position. and we're just never gonna know any of that 😢 so really, khun could be anywhere on this list. but i do think that korn pulled some amount of shit here, and khun should get to repay him in full.

also, i think khun is the only one on this list who would do it slow. and i think korn should have to die slowly, pitifully, knowing that his own son is lowering him into his grave and being able to do nothing about it.

3. porsche

where do i even begin? dead dad. imprisoned mom. terrible fake uncle that skimmed all their money and put them in debt. soooooo much lying and manipulating and gaslighting holy shit like so much. porsche is owed MANY pounds of flesh.

and i think it would feel like justice served — not just for himself, but for his family. and for korn's underestimation of him. apples and dull knives, indeed.

the only reason why it might be hard for him would be because kinn would get really hecked up over it. which brings me to...

2. vegas

you could make a good argument for switching porsche and vegas on this list. but i think vegas deserves it just a tiny bit more, and that's because korn has spent vegas's entire life cutting him down into a shell of himself.

sometimes i think about how happy and at peace vegas might have been if korn hadn't been so insistent on inciting competition within the family, and then i want to cry. and then i wish vegas had pulled that trigger when he had korn in his sights.

i bet vegas wishes he had, too. he wants it. and god knows someone should start letting vegas have what he wants.

1. namphueng

you knew this was coming. we all knew.

listen i'm just saying that namphueng could desecrate korn's corpse in the most horrifying ways and i'd just be like 😌👍 girl you looked so good clawing out his jugular and sawing his limbs off do it again ❤️

(thank you @kissporsche for the idea 🥰)

[anaalnathrakhs]

it fucking breaks my heart i've been killing myself for months trying to repair my relationship w my parents and the three of us are just fucking deficient human beings. we're incapable of changing we're fucking incapable of it there's no going back everything was set from the moment i was born. they never should've had a child, but what the fuck could i blame on them? once the kid is here you just do your best you can't just decide it was a bad idea and get rid of it. they did their best. there's no good way to deal with a fucked up child. but holy fuck i wish i wasnt just idk born wrong. i wish life didn't suck and wasn't so hard. i wish when my mom said she'd take more time for family and relaxing she didn't go back to working until 8pm at least every day in the following month, but there's realities pushing her to. i wish when we saw each other we had things to do rather than just stare at each other awkwardly. i can't ever do anything because everything impacts my parents. and god knows i owe them to stop impacting them so much i did enough shit already. i can't enjoy a trip out with them because then we go home and it's MORE incredibly unsatisfactory socializing and forced eating lest they look at me like a monster. i can't leave because then it's WE leave not I leave. i can't just live my life after school because i have to be back to have the terrible binge-inducing dinner with them else i'm a fucking monster who makes them stay awake and worry at night. i have to make them aware of my every move because else they're gonna worry, i can't do that to them i have no valid reason to. i can't ever relax. i have no safe place anymore. there's always food in the house, we always have to go grocery shopping the same day and fill up the pantry. i can't buy anything substantial or component of a "normal" meal because then they just sit there while my mom never uses them despite knowing about them the whole time. there's been bricks of soup in the pantry for like two months she hasn't even MENTIONNED CONSIDERING THEM for the whole time. we bought, and i mean WE bought, WE took a couple canned vegetables from the shelves and we said good idea and we put them in the cart, and then she NEVER used them until i desperately broke the agreement that i was not to have control over what's for dinner and suggested we could perhaps maybe eat the food we had bought to eat, and she was like yeah sure great idea! we ate one can, and then for WEEKS afterwards we still don't touch any of the other cans. she keeps adding and adding and adding a billion things to every meal it makes me wanna rope. she keeps putting huge slabs of butter in pasta MOTHER it tastes the same except it's gross and five billion calories now can you stop doing that thanks. i've had my parents pretty much at my will for many many things all of my life, because they're completely floating in the meaningless void on what it means to be a parent, and it's just not healthy in ways i cannot possibly wholly imagine, and now we're stuck in some sort of circle that if i don't DEMAND something it's like i never said anything. but i can't DEMAND things because that is not a control a kid should have over their own parents and there's no nuance of possible things it's either they'll bend over backwards for even the most ill-advised demand or they will not budge an inch for the most structured three-parted argument doubled with the plead of my failing mental health even if it has demonstrably not worked before, and i certainly do not want to have a relationship with ANYONE where they feel forced to act a certain way because of me. and it's been so weird having developped this kind of very marked independance on like, DRIVE, while i was a neet, that now that i'm older and more legitimate to slowly leave the nest it feels incredibly weird and bad to entrap myself more closely instead.

so i keep trying to give them the elements of what consequences this or that thing has on me, and letting them evaluate themselves what they value, and so far the result has been that they don't give a shit about making me suffer, and they're completely cool with watching me act like i'm coked up in public bc i'm in pain or about to jump out of my skin in fearful anticipation of the next meal. i can handle myself all day and literally just ramble a little under my breath when we're going home at 9pm because it helps with the pain, and they're like "WHAT NOW we say something and you start sighing, what the hell did we do wrong this time??" which i guess is their genuine answer to the situation so i got what i wanted, i didn't control their reactions, but i guess it's pretty disappointing anyway.

and i can't really tell them because hey, how is that conversation gonna go? mom, dad, living with you is unbearable, all of my life you've done nothing but hurt me despite your best loving intentions, and i honestly don't think we're ever gonna fully repair that. cheers. i can't fucking do that to them. i've been the worst child to deal with my entire life i can't do that i just have to hold on until i move out anyway. it itches SO BAD to hurt them to blame them to throw every nasty thing i've ever wanted to yell at them to push them down the stairs and run away in the middle of the night. but i can't because they've done their best. genuinely. i wouldn't have handled it better if i had to parent kid-me. i don't think there's any right answer to a situation like that. i just can't wait until i can live for myself and not for walking around eggshells being the normal kid my parents never got to have now that i can force myself to. it feels like i try my best to give them respect and foster a good mutually-trusting relationship with them, and they don't give back anything different in return. and i do think part of that is that i'm WAAAAAY too in my own head about it and i have massive "nobody is allowed in the kitchen when i'm there" syndrome except my entire existence is the kitchen and anything i do besides "staying the usual unshowered neet disappointment in my room" being seen by my parents feels to me like if walking around naked in public. like how people ask out as a joke, like HA you really believe you could be more than a depressed piece of shit, but you're really nothing more than a pathetic failure barely keeping up the mask of a normal person. and that is totally my responsability to deal with except idk seems like every time i step out it turns out to be a disaster. and the coming down is even harsher, having to turn back into some featureless zombie picking and choosing what interests are undisruptive and inoffensive enough for me to tell my parents about it. i havent even managed to try to get into a sport club because the thought of my parents knowing this and that about my schedule and knowing i do sports and what sports i do and perhaps asking about it just makes my skin crawl. and i can't be spending their money, and i don't have a job, so.

they wont leave me the hell alone, and i can't refuse else i just become defined by my avoidance of them. it's rotting in my bed without any of the recharging. i don't fucking want to eat dinner with them, but else WHAT DO I DO? the kitchen is upstairs, upstairs is where they are, especially during dinner time but also they can hear i'm there if they're awake at home. and i owe them to spend that time bonding w them since we never did, and it's pretty much the only time my mom is home. i don't want to go with them to random events i don't really care about, because they're unenjoyable anyway since they're followed by MORE proximity and shit, but i kinda have to because i owe them that after i was nothing but a fucking emotional leech for my entire life, and also if i don't go to these events with them i go NOWHERE, cf the problem with my parents seeing anything about me mentionned above.

you might notice i've been saying "they" the whole time, rest assured, i mean my mom, or the united parental authority driven by my mom. i barely even have a dad anyway, i have a guy who lives in the same house and comes when my mom calls family reunion time, but spends his entire time every day following his own intellectual pursuits while floating through every actualy physical situation he's in. he barely listens. he barely reacts. he's not stupid or wholly incompetent, he functions alone pretty well, but in most situations in life he just stands to the side and goes "damn" whenever anything would require a reaction. i'm not really sure he fully realizes (or cares) that his actions impact other people. it scares me to be like him. i know how similar i am to him, and i really really hope i don't end up hurting anyone by being like that.

[bi-bats]

5, 6, 10, and 18 <3

Hiya bestie!! Thank you for the ask 💖

5. What’s a fic idea you’ve had that you will never write?

Probably The Birth of a God, which is a very complicated greek mythology au where Jason is Icarus and he falls in love with Apollo (Tim) and builds the wax wings because he's trying to reach him. After his death he gets revived as Ares (I've assigned out greek gods to over half of the characters in this fic including Dick as Aphrodite, Bruce as Hades, Damian as Thanatos, Barbara as Hephaestus, Cass as Athena, Alfred as Hestia, Duke as Helios) and doesn't tell anyone, but Tim goes to Bruce to get Jason back, which Bruce refuses because he can't. He doesn't tell Tim that he can't because Jason isn't actually there, so of course Tim wages war on him, which drags Jason into it because he's the god of war even though Tim doesn't know that and adkljfdlkfjdlkfdlfjlkdj

Look I love this idea and I'd love to read it but. I'd have to WRITE it and the amount of research I would have to do to twist the plot around the way I want would be insane so it's probably going to die in my brain 😭😭😭

6. Are there any fics from others you reread all the time?

Oh yeah absolutely. Lemme link a few (that aren't just smut lol):

sweet dreams (are made of thee) by @yasmindifference (jaytim dreamsharing 😭😭😭)

and a hand to bite by Sister (the jaytim exes to lovers of all time and also the fic that inspired Rooftops and Bookshops)

chaos is a color I wear well (and it looks mighty good on you) by @glaciya (jaytim angsty feels fic I love this one so much)

Like a Bat out of Hell by @allacesandeights (this fic. This fucking FIC. It's literally one of my go-to recs for when I'm trying to get people into JayTim and it deserves so so so much more recognition than it has holy shit this fic is so fucking good like. I very rarely read fics where I think the plot is perfect but this one is just so well done all around and akjdfajdfsdf read it)

I Didn't Say I Liked You by Generatorcat (I reread this one a LOT it's just delightful I love when they play chicken and you do it SO well, thank you for this one 💖)

Show Me the Meaning (Of Being Lonely) by @timmyjaybird (like. holy shit this whole series. I owe my life as an author to this series. This is the series that got me to consider shipping jaytim and also the first damitim fic that ever made my brain go brrrrrrr I've literally read this series like. 20 times at least and I never would have fallen deep enough into this fandom to start writing without it so thank you thank you thank you and everyone go read it)

10. Is there a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

Definitely, and it's Now Kiss. I did not expect the response on that and if you know me, you've heard me talk about that. It just felt so rushed when I was writing it and I didn't get a chance to really edit it the way I wanted to and I've worked way harder on fics before and even if it was one of the ones that I was the most excited to share for JTW, there's just a part of me that's like: that's the one everyone loves so much?

That said, one thing about the response that has been lovely is that I've taken it as permission to trust myself a little more. There were a lot of things with that fic that I was uncertain about, but I liked them and decided to leave them alone even if I wasn't 100% sure because I was on a deadline and wanted it posted. They were probably the kinds of things that I would've fretted about incessantly and edited to death if I'd had more time, but people liked them, so it's been really nice to be able to let go of some of my self-doubt!

18. What’s one of your favorite lines you’ve written in a fic?

Damian has always hated that Tim can carve the meat from an action, pull the bone of it out clean.

grughauhgaruharhgau just. I love this line so much. It says so much about both of them. It was also a tight race between that and this:

Everyone believes Goldie, all of the time. He just flashes that gorgeous smile like a fucking master key, and Jason’s always been a tiny bit jealous that everyone else turned out so goddamn endearing. 

also this one 😭😭😭 I really like the way that it reads like Jason's voice and also this is one of those things that he would never ever say because he can barely admit that it's true, even though it is

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

Its the end of the year! Which means its time to post the

Tags That Made Me Smile 2022

The following are a collective list of tags, author notes, and fic names that i saw on ao3 and tumblr that made me either laugh or smile. Ive separated them by fandom but a good amount arent actually fandom specific. Ive added the character names or fandom at the end like {name} to clarify who the tag is talking about

[2021's list]

Author Specific / Non-Specific

i saw canon; acknowledged it; And promply burned it in a dirty trash can thanks; Have this instead

Give me pain I need to feel something

this is self projection thank you coming to my ted talk

Whats that?? Overused tropes that everyone has seen before????? Pfffffffft. This fic is literally just a big mess of "how can I cater to myself and myself only"

you ever just look at your life and wonder how you got here; bc that's what this fic is for me

Don't underestimate me I DO NOT know how long this fan-fic will be

can you tell my target audience is myself

this is content specifically catered to me and no one else

these characters are my landlords and i pay them rent

P O L Y A M O R Y   I S   M Y   P O L Y J A M O R Y

cheek kiss warning

kidnapping isn’t sexy don’t do it

i've never read the archie comics but that's not gonna stop me {archie sonic}

not me writing a whole fic for a ship only i care about; that like maybe two other people ship; rowing this boat is hard but someone has to do it {scourge x fleetway sonic}

ankles don't heal this fast but fuck it i do what i want

no beta we die like men; or rather we drown like the sad shipper with a pool noodle we are

I'm afraid of the Danimals mascot and you should be too

if you're getting flood warnings, don't worry. It's just MY TEARS!

me at every character: anxiety be upon ye

Me (Grabs canon and runs a marathon with it)

Quote: Do you think God stays in heaven because he too lives in fear of what he's created (Spy Kids) {tmnt crossover}

Alternate Universe - Monty Python and the Holy Grail

contains dangerous amount of bed based snuggling

(kind of its a very short very homosexual fight scene); and then they kiss.

Hostage situation takes a romantic turn???? Not clickbait????

enemies to frenemies

Improper Use of Pool Noodles

stone cold stoicism meeting determined stupidity

Star Wars

Kanan Jarrus: The Daddening

platonic love is what healed his lonely existence {din djarin}

when in doubt: road trip with the besties {din, boba, fennec}

Soul Eater

found family at its finest {kid, liz, patty}

The Witcher

wife (platonic) {yennskier}

at first I was like haha geralt and Istredd should kiss as a joke…. but bro I don’t think it’s a joke anymore….

Sonic the Hedgehog

Movie!Super Sonic is made out of LOVE no one touch me

Sonics gay awakening I guess

sonic movie 2 made me make an ao3 account lol

Sonic was made to love people

Two Bros Chillin’ in an ER Five Feet Apart ‘cause they’re not gay {sonic x shadow}

the most dangerous thing is to love {shadow}

Trapped in a small box with just enough room to face some feelings {sonic x shadow}

the R in rivalry stand for romance {sonic x shadow}

The L in Rivalry Stands For 'Love' {sonic x shadow}

A Largely Platonic Cave

i love boom!shadow so naturally i made him even more insufferable

Sad-ow

Wachowskis holdin it down in the bg; Absolute champs

I love how Shadow is just so mindbogglingly utterly done with reality

Knuckles is a guardian of all things great and small

“Would you kiss a worm?" “If he was cute as fuck? Yeah.” {wade x stone}

"What is this made of, bendable titanium?!" "INCORRECT. IT IS MADE OF THE FRUSTRATIONS OF MOTHERS EVERYWHERE." {team dark}

featuring a scourge that trips far too much because it's my fic and I said so {scourge x fleetway sonic}

no thoughts just soft hedgehog moments

listen if im going to die at the hands of injured lancelot shit i might as well take advantage of it

Everyone has a crush on Lancelot and I'll die on this hill

fairy Lancelot Fairy Lancelot FAIRY LANCELOT!!!

TMNT

Slow Burn; mostly on april's end of things; casey and donnie are basically on fire right off the bat {tmnt 2012}

Rise!Donnie and 2012!Casey be out there committing arson together for their first date >.>

Please enjoy Casey, the fool, realizing his feelings for Donnie, another fool {tmnt 2012}

Draxum and Splinter are the turtles' dads (it's a reluctant partnership)

just two absolute powerhouses holding each other gently {raph x mona}

“There’s nothing wrong with the way you love, Dee. Goodnight.” {rottmnt}

Wondering what to do when the apocalypse happens? Easy: fly across the country and get Vegas-married. That's definetley an appropriate reaction that won't involve your complicated feelings towards your roommate at all {hypno x warren}

Look rise are weapons of war 12 were accidents and I play with that HARD in this fic

"GET IN THE TURTLE TANK BITCHES WE GOING TO FAMILY THERAPY" {rottmnt}

Donatello is now Dad-Atello {rottmnt}

The other [Casey] is out on a beach in Tahiti; It's what he deserves after surviving the Krang {rottmnt}

Leo is now actively being hunted for sport; (the only sport Donnie is good at) {rottmnt}

These turtles can fit so much trauma

2018 Karai lives because fuck Nick; Casey x Donnie x April are a healthy ship and also fuck nick again

I cant be the only one pissed by Leo's and Karais 'love interest plot'; Leonardo's weird feelings were simply gender envy...Yes that is canon now {tmnt 2012}

What happens when two "dudes" call each other 'girlfriend'; Transgender activities, that's what! {tmnt 2012}

splinter is twice divorced and never married {rottmnt}

Papatello / Dadatello {rottmnt}

draxum's gone from dadxum to grand-dadxum good for him

HOLY FUCKING SHIT YES YES YES YES; GRANDPA BARRY COMING IN CLUTCH

draxum just be like gramps still got it; and by 'it' i mean a complete lack of forethought for care when creating random children

Puts the Bi in Bitchless {rottmnt leo}

its because ninja turtles

feral mamatello {rottmnt}

Marvel

it's the anguish, the self flagellation, the audacity to love the man who annihilate ur nation and killed ur mother; your m o t h e r {black panther}

[icharchivist]

I'm so grateful for the Gbf anni events tbh... Sandalphon is the character of all time, something about Belial immediately activates my neurons every time without fail, Cosmos is a MILF, Orologia is my little skrunkly... It's just peak everything and I owe them my entire life. Even if Cosmos is dead and Belial is in horny jail. Here's to hoping we get playable Logia at some point

NO BUT SAME.

I know that a couple of the newest anni events have been. ripped to shred by the fanbase, but while i have some general pacing issues with them perhaps, i still liked the stories it was telling :( and the new characters introduced in those events have been massive hit with me and genuinely fantastic to /think/ about and analyse.

Sandalphon is def character of all time, idk what they ate to come up with Belial but holy shit that was a stroke of genius, i think think Nehan and Mugen bring so much more to the general story and i love my saddest meow meow and his giant son, Cosmos is MILF and makes me cry all the time and giving Lucifer a bestie who could so genuinely understand him was something that genuinely pulled by heartstrings even now, and Orologia *starts sobbing so uncontrollably that only the word "parent" ends up making sense there*

(ok and i admit i skipped Moon Sweet Home because i've been meaning to read the full Society saga before reading it and i. never came around to do it 🙈 but from what i heard it was a great storyline, Yatima is fantastic, Eustace gets proper closure, and Cassius our love. )

But yeah honestly it's just. so fucking good, and seeing the pattern, considering how characters like Nehan and Sandalphon and Cassius got playable units after their stellar anni events... Orologia you're next i'm not leaving you any choice here. You lived. you're ours now. Thank you.

God the anni events are good...

[hinatastinygiant]

Chapter Fifty Five

Staphylus Ceos

Pairing: Haikyuu!! x Fem!Reader

previous | next | 2099

After you and Osamu step out of the bus, you sling Hinata's gun around your shoulder and walk around to check the tires. Neither you nor Osamu say anything as you walk separate ways, planning to meet up together in the back.

"The ones on this side look alright, how 'bout your-" you begin before you see Osamu with a gun to his head. Behind him stands a man with black hair and thin blue eyes. In any other context, you'd think he'd look like a nice person. "Shit."

"Hey there, sweetheart. You're Y/N, aren't ya? Well, I think your friends forgot to mention that there was someone else living with them after you left. That, or maybe they were just too stupid to notice. My name is Akaashi. Bokuto and I were pretty good friends," he smiles.

"Well, Bokuto's long fucking gone. You'll need to go to hell to find him," you say as you pull your gun from your shoulder. "I can send you there if you'd like."

"I think I've got a better plan, you little whore. Bo did tell me you were always good at following his directions," he grins.

"What the fuck do you want, Ak-ass-hi," you respond, saying his name incorrectly on purpose.

"You to join him," he smiles. "Take your own fucking life or I'll take your friend's."

"I can see how you'd be friends with Bokuto," you scoff. "You're fucking insane. There's two of us here against just you. Why would I listen to you?"

"You're just as stupid as the rest of 'em," he laughs as he tightens his grip on Osamu. "If you don't shoot yourself I'll shoot him right in the head. What more do you want?"

"Y/N, don't-"

"Shut the fuck up, I didn't say it was your decision, did I?" Akaashi whispers sternly at Osamu. "And keep it down, I don't need the others finding out."

"Fuck you," Osamu continues to spit back.

"I'm serious, you piece of shit. Don't test me-"

"Fine!" you interrupt as you spin your gun and press the muzzle against the side of your head just like Akaashi is doing to Osamu. "Samu, the second I do it, make your move. Don't get distracted or he'll kill you, too."

"Y/N, what the fuck are you thinking?" he shouts at you. "Don't you dare!"

"It's okay," you say to him, though you're really trying to reassure yourself. The last thing you want right now is for your life to end when you're so close to getting off this god-forsaken island. Especially now that you've found Suna and a whole group of friends who have made you happy.

You don't want to let Bokuto win. He already got his satisfaction with Tsukishima, Kuroo, and Atsumu. You don't want to be the next win, but what choice do you have? It's either you or Osamu and you've already resolved that you aren't going to let anyone else die on your watch.

"Osamu, make sure you get off this fucking island," you say as you close your eyes and remove the safety lock. However, just as you're about to give in and pull the trigger, another shot is heard a second earlier. You open your eyes and see Osamu moving away from Akaashi who hits the ground with a loud thud. Behind him stands Suna.

Immediately, you drop your gun and fall to your knees. "No fucking way," you say to no one in particular as you try to piece together what just happened. "Holy shit."

Suna walks up to you and bends down on his knees. He places his hand on your back and rubs softly, quietly trying to calm you down.

"You just saved my fucking life, Suna," you whisper.

"Yeah well add it to the list of things you owe me for," he teases.

"Fuck you," you scoff as you shake your head and look up at him.

"You're welcome."

Upon realizing that he really did save you from killing yourself, you throw your arms around him and pull him tightly against you. "Thank you, Rin," you sob into his shoulder. "I'd be dead without you."

"It's okay, Y/N. You're alright," he hums back softly.

"Yeah, he's dead alright," Osamu nods as he kicks Akaashi's body before bending down and beginning to rifle through Akaashi's pockets. "Down to hell where he belongs."

Relieved, you look back at Suna and sigh. He places his hand softly against the side of your face and gently slides his hand down to cup your cheek. Then, as your brain is still spinning, he leans close to you and kisses you on the forehead.

"I'm so glad I got out here in time," he whispers quietly as he lingers so close to you, though you can hardly hear him over the loud beating of your heart.

"Okay, freaks, get back to the bus. The wheels look alright," Osamu interrupts once more. "That asshole put a bunch of rocks in front of the wheels on the side I checked. I'll move 'em out of the way, you two go back inside."

"Alright, thanks, Osamu," Suna nods as he pulls away from you and takes you by the hand. He then slides your arm around his shoulder and carefully helps you stand up. Together, the two of you then walk back to the bus entrance.

When you get inside, the others stare at you both with wide eyes. "I told you guys everything would be alright, calm down," Suna sighs. "I took care of it."

"What happened?" Hinata asks.

"Where Osamu?" Kenma chimes in.

"He's coming," you tell them, "he's just fixing the wheels. He'll be right up. As for what happened, Suna saved my life."

Oikawa looks between the two of you anxiously, ready to hear what you have to say about the incident and almost looking regretful as if he wishes he was the one who went out there to save you first.

previous | next | 2099

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Taglist: @isentsworld

[tora-the-cat]

Izuku: So you have a weight limit on your quirk, but is it a weight limit or a mass limit? Like, if you were on the moon-

Someone in the distance: MIDORIYA!

Tenya, sitting up, ready to fight: Who was that?

Izuku: Hm? Oh, probably Shinsou-kun. Anyway so if you were on-

Tsuyu: ...why?

Izuku: Because gravity is lower on the moon, so theoret-

Tsuyu: No, why is Shinsou-kun yelling for you?

Katsuki, more recognizable by scream, also in the distance: WHAT DID DEKU DO THIS TIME?

Izuku: Probably because I stole his hair dye. So-

Todoroki, blinking back to full awareness: His what?

Katsuki, breaking into maniacal laughter: HOLY SHIT!! BWAHAHAHA! HOLY SHIT??

Izuku: His. Purple hair dye? That he uses to dye his hair?

Tenya:

Tsuyu:

Ochako: ....His wh-

Shoto, way too excited, sitting upright: I knew it.

Izuku: Wait. You guys...didn't think that was natural, did you? It's purple!

Tsuyu: Your hair is naturally green.

Izuku, dyes his hair green: Yeah, and? So is yours?

Tsuyu: Is purple....that much stranger?

Izuku: I mean. Given his parentage, I would say so.

Shoto, leaning forward, eyes gleaming: His what?

Izuku, itching his cheek nervously: Ah! Oh, I- I probably shouldn't say-

Hitoshi, roots dyed black, crashing through the door to Izuku's room: You.

Izuku, blinking his big doe-eyes: Me?

Hitoshi: What the hell is your problem?

Izuku: ???

Ochako, shifting in front of Izuku, ride or die: What's your problem?

Tenya: You are supposed to knock before entering a room that is not your own!

Tsuyu: mhm.

Shoto, eyeing Hitoshi's hair like a cat eyes a canary: What. Is up with your hair.

Hitoshi, glaring murder at Izuku: Someone dyed my roots while I was sleeping.

Izuku, innocent face falling for a sly smirk usually reserved for fights with Katsuki: Really? That's the best you got?

Hitoshi: ....huh?

Izuku: Dyed your hair while you were asleep?

Hitoshi:

Izuku: You expect us to believe that you slept through your hair being dyed?

Hitoshi:

Izuku: It's okay, I already told them I stole your hair dye. You can just ask for it back.

Hitoshi: ...What.

Izuku: In my defense, I didn't know you dying your hair was a secret! Don't look at me like that!

Hitoshi: What? Are you talking about?

Shoto: You dye your hair. You dye your hair purple. Your natural hair color is black. I knew it. I knew it.

Ochako, pumping her fist: Mina owes me BIG TIME!

Hitoshi: What are you people fucking talking about. Don't tell me you believe-

Ochako: I knew backing one of your theories would pay off eventually! I always believed you, Shoto-kun!

Shoto: Thank you. That means a lot to me. Shinsou, do you have anything to say?

Hitoshi: No. This is not happening. You people are crazy. This is not happening.

Tsuyu: .....Where'd Izuku-kun go?

Izuku, coming back from his closet with a bottle of half-full purple hair-dye: Here ya go, Hitoshi-kun! =)

Hitoshi, staring at the bottle like it killed his family: You. You sick bastard. You've played them all like fiddles.

Ochako, rolling her eyes: Oh, don't be dramatic. Just admit Deku got you, fair and square.

Izuku, leaning back hesitantly: ....Do you not want it back?

Hitoshi, vibrating with anger: I'm going to get you back for this. I don't know how, but I will.

Izuku: For....stealing your dye? I'm sorry, I didn't know you would get so angry. It was just supposed to be a joke!

Hitoshi: For making people believe that I'm Aizawa-sensei's kid, you-

Izuku, not smirking but Hitoshi swears to god he can see it in his eyes: But....I never said that? Black is the most common hair color in the country! Why...why would you jump straight to that conclusion?

Hitoshi:

Izuku: ....unless-

Hitoshi: *lunges for Izuku's fucking throat*

Izuku: *already out the window running for his life*

Ochako, jumping to her feet: Should we help? We should help.

Shoto, pulling out his conspiracy theory notebook: No. We have more important work to do.

Ochako: But-

Tsuyu: You need evidence to cash in your bet.

Tenya: Should we really be betting on-

Ochako: You're absolutely right Tsu. Priorities are important.

Tenya: ....I'll go get Aizawa-

Shoto: No. No are you serious do you want to fight me right now do you know how long I've been waiting for-

Tenya: I! Will go get...All Might?

Izuku, laughing as something large crashes in the distance: Come on! Can't you take a joke?

Shoto: ... Okay Yeah. That's probably a good idea actually.

[free-boundsoul]

Inversion spoilers

Holy fuck. This is gonna be a wreck and a ramble

Okay, poor fucking Milo. Getting stuck outside the ward. And he just wants to be in there with his pack. Having to explain to the mates.

Gavin.... this probably hurt the worst with how he's just getting bombarded with all those terrible emotions. I just want to hold him close and protect him

Lasko saying that his family, all of them, being stuck in there. How stressed and helpless he must feel and he just has to wait.

Hux being an actual fucking rock for Damien. Damien breaking down and crying like that though? Losing all that composure. I'm just sitting here crying.

Mads sticker has so much more truth to it after that video. If I ever see Kody, I'm decking him. Him finding a hiding spot and attacking other people to keep himself safe is so in character though.

David having to make the decision to close the ward...jumping in before it closes so he can be inside to help and protect. Asher being with him and doing his best to be there for him.

Vincent's first thought just being to get to Lovely T.T Sam calming him down enough so he can focus.

Fucking Xavier....I had a bad feeling that he only had one video before this whole inversion but fuck if it still doesn't hurt. My heart is already hurting for Gavin, I can only imagine that he's blaming himself. I'm so scared for how Huxley is going to react.

Gavin trying to keep up his ward and his crying when the emotions start bombarding him again. Him focusing on the FL to try and get those good feelings to combat against it. Him also thinking of Damien and Lasko and Hux...

Milo and Lasko doing whatever they could to help get people out. Milo encouraging Lasko. He's so much smarter than I would be in this situation. Sweetheart willing to risk everything to help Milo...

Angel either wearing or holding David's jacket and just being forced to wait and knowing they can't do anything

Lovely and Vincent fighting together... Lovely getting mortally wounded (I saw that fucking tag on patreon before I listened and I was stressing over it)

Oh my God, David breaking down. Asher getting hurt... so thankful to Sam for being there. Sam is such a reassurance, fuck, he's probably freaking the fuck out and yet he's displaying such a level head. Ashers fucking "ow" had me crying

Lasko on the loud speaker, the pain in his voice as he explains what's happening, pleading for help... I just want to hug him tight

Sam going from saving Asher to going to help Vincent and Lovely and not able to do anything.

Fuck, Vincent... his voice cracking and breaking as he asks Lovely if he can turn them... he loves them so much and he still gave them the choice.

Sam's stern voice when he's trying to convince David to rest. David's guilt at locking people in with the shades even though it was the right call to protect the rest of the city.

Fuck, everyone fighting together. Damien pushing himself to try and protect people and fight the shades. Oh fuck, the panic in Hux's voice.

Milo acting as a conduit? Probably the wrong word to stop the flow of Magic and bring down the wards... willing to risk his life to bring it down. How is that going to affect him?

Fuck yes the shades getting blasted from everyone coming together on the outside once the ward came down.

Fuck the Commissioner

Lasko finding Hux and Damien 😭 Damien being stubborn...the little shit.

Asher and David getting reunited with Angel and Babe 😭

Sam and Darlin! Fuck the pain in his voice, him crying 😭

Milo crying in relief when he finally hears David and Asher 😭 "let's go see our family"

I'll say it again, fuck the commissioner.

Oh god, that last bit with Brachium doesn't help the anxiety.

Welp that was a wild ride and I wish that I'd taken the moment to eat something instead of immediately waking up and listening to the Inversion. Cuz I don't know if I can eat anything yet.

I can't wait for the aftershock videos though

Sorry that this is a mess

[goji-pilled]

Okay @princekirijo you want an essay? Well here it is now, or as I like to call it Felix's "Asumari is great and this fandom has no fucking taste" rambling and infodump. Congrats fellas, thanks to Prince you ALL get an asumari essay. But before that I'll try to give you a rundown of Mari and Asuka. 

(I'm also so sorry for putting this long ass post on everyone's dashboard)

(Spoiler warning for Evangelion 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon a Time!!)

Alright on one hand we have Mari Illustrious Makinami. Her whole deal? She's a walking ray of sunshine, literally lol. Unlike any other character in the Evangelion franchise she doesn't suffer from her trauma, she's quite literally the only healthy and functioning human being, she's just slightly leaning towards "batshit crazy" with the stunts she pulls 🤷‍♂️. Other than that she just loves living, she loves being with people, she keeps moving forward, stays positive and decides to live life to it's fullest even after she experiences loss and multiple apocalyptic events (Second Impact, Third Impact, etc.) and she really just embodies the joy of living. That's all there is to her, or at least all we know.

On the other hand, we have Asuka Langley Shikinami who is... well it's hard to explain what she is to be honest. She's part-German and part-Japanese and part of a line of clones specifically made with the purpose to pilot an Evangelion and later on be used as a sacrifice to trigger another Impact (ITS COMPLICATED I KNOW-) Asuka is, unlike Mari, very much suffering from her trauma. She doesn't have her parents and has a very deep seated belief that she's completely alone, which she says doesn't matter as long as she can pilot the Eva. She also very much wants to fight and kill angels all by herself, and it's seriously messing with her when she can't achieve that.

Now we get to the more interesting parts (hopefully this so far wasn't too confusing, then again it's Eva and even I can't fully wrap my head around it all LMAO)

In the second Rebuild movie (Evangelion 2.0 You can (not) advance) we get introduced to both of them, Mari's introduction scene (in the original English dub) has her pilot an Eva and singing about how she'll take the world on by herself, while in the third movie's (Evangelion 3.0 You can (not) redo) opening scene she's piloting the Eva again but this time it's together with Asuka (in her own Unit 02 though) and during that Mari sings about how wonderful it is not to be alone. It's nothing big yet, but it's a really cute detail me thinks,,, you know what else I love about them? They bicker and they banter and it's genuinely so fun to listen to shskdhsuwj

(For a quick catch up: During the end of 2.0 Shinji (the protagonist) triggers another apocalyptic event, the Near Third Impact, and was only stopped due to Kaworu (the guy in my pfp) stepping in. Also between 1.0/2.0 and 3.0/3.0+1.0 are about 14 years (without Shinji bc he's like comatose) where A LOT happens AND we learn in 3.0 that Eva pilots don't age physically bc of "The curse of the Eva"... honestly Eva is wild lmao)

Okay okay I'll get back to it!

So one thing that happens is that Asuka during 2.0 develops a crush on Shinji (girl why-), unfortunately things take a turn for the worse. Asuka had volunteered to be the testpilot for a new Eva (Unit 03), she seemed happy at the time and it was a really sweet build up with the "I can smile, I didn't know I could still do that."-line. And then? Then it turns out the Ninth Angel had infected Unit 03 (Angels are basically the Kaijus they fight using Evas btw). The thing goes on a loose and Shinji is forced to fight it (With Asuka inside mind you), he refuses and his father uses an autopilot to destroy Unit 03. And boy did it destroy the angel, well it and it crushed Asuka between its jaws (you can actually hear her scream btw haha pain :)).

Asuka survived though, but the whole incident cost her her humanity and she ended up becoming an angel herself/she took the place of the Ninth. But despite that, there's one person who keeps believing in Asuka's humanity, who fiercely believes Asuka is still a human and tells her as much.

Yep, that one person is Mari and she keeps holding onto that belief until the very end when Asuka uses her last resort, which is using the power of an angel (Doing so was a guaranteed death sentence btw). Mari's own words (in the German dub) were, "Princess, you're giving up being human…" AND IT MAKES ME SO EMO GOD FUCK

While I'm at it, Mari and Asuka are a fucking killer combo as a team. They rely on each other for support in combat, listen to the other's orders and advice. Especially in Asuka's case it's kind of a big deal that she so openly relies and counts on Mari's support. Like these two trust each other with their damn lifes!!! Holy shit!!

Guess what though, they also have nicknames for eachother. Mari always calls Asuka "Princess" or "(Your) Highness" while Asuka calles Mari "Four-eyes" / "Four-eyed chrony (idk how you spell that tbh RIP" Even better though, in the German dub Asuka calls Mari "Brillerella" as in a combination of "Brille" (German for glasses) and "Cinderella",,,,Cinderella and her Prince,,,Brillerella and her Princess,,, man, that was a gay fucking move of the translation team. Spoiler: I owe them my life.

Funfact: There's exactly two times throughout the Rebuild movies where Mari uses Asuka's actual name. These two times being when she watches Asuka "die" and be used as a sacrifice for Gendo's selfish plan and when later on she begs Shinji, "So please the Princess… Asuka needs your help!" And the best part? That wasn't even the first time she did that. The mentioned line came from 3.0+1.0, but she did that too in 3.0 with the, "At least save the Princess!" line (although her tone was much more...pissed, like she was really angry lol)

Remember the crush Asuka had on Shinji? Well due to the Unit 03 incident a whole lot of other shit got mixed into that and her feelings for him in general became really bitter (understandably so). Now Mari being who she is sometimes teases Asuka about said old crush but she really does want Asuka to get closure and sort that mess out. 

As an example for the teasing, in 3.0 there's a scene that goes like this (please imagine Mari with a literal :3 face while saying that):

"Unit! Are you back in the game?"

"I'm on it, your Highness. But first things first, how was our little puppy (Shinji)? Did he sit like a good little boy?"

"He's exactly the same! Same stupid face talking mayhem!"

"That goofy face of his, that's what you wanted to see? Riiiiight?"

"Shut up! I went there to bat him one!... And I feel better!"

There's also a very short bonus manga that was released in Japan for Thrice Upon a Time's release that has Mari trying to convince Asuka to come with her on the mission to get Shinji, given everything that follows, it's just another thing to prove my point. And the final bit relating to that is this:

"Feeling better now?"

"Yeah, I do feel better."

That's the exchange Asuka and Mari have after they talked to Shinji, it's nothing special but I think it's really sweet and this time Asuka actually sounded like she was feeling better instead of when she was screaming after she nearly broke pretty thick glass with her fist (If she had hit someone with that much force she definitely would've broken something omggg #violentimpulsesgang)

To get back on track though: I already mentioned it but during the second half of 3.0+1.0 Asuka "dies" (and honestly that entire scene is worth its own in-depth post because its just one huge parallel to The End of Evangelion), the point is: You can tell that the loss of Asuka honestly hits Mari hard. Not only because of how Mari screams Asuka's name but also because of her expressions. They're pained, like really fucking pained and Mari even apologizes to her that she has to fall back due to the fact that she's injured AND because eveything is going wrong.

After the events of Evangelion 3.0 these two got seperated from eachother, Mari was with WILLE (the organization both of them are with) and on board of Wunder (the ship WILLE basically operates from) while Asuka was in a Village full of (Near) Third Impact Survivors. When they do meet again it went like this:

Asuka, barely back, comes to the door and calls, "I'm back." And within seconds of Asuka stepping into their room after the door opens Mari already runs towards her, arms wide open and she says, "Welcome back, your Highness! Good job. I missed you so much!" And she says that while she literally nuzzles into Asuka,,,like,,,what the fuck gay people real!!! 

Best part? Asuka clearly has enough strength to push Mari completely away if she were uncomfortable, but she doesn't. Asuka merely wanted enough space to look at the room (because Mari managed to horde even more books lol) and play her game. During their entire renunion Mari keeps hugging her, and part of me thinks that perhaps deep down Asuka actually enjoys the feeling of physical affection.

Before we get to the last point though, let me say that Asuka and Mari have scenes in 3.0+1.0 that parallel Shinji and Kaworu's from 3.0. (Fyi Kaworu loves Shinji (yeah, like that, and 3.0 was basically them being gay as fuck for an hour) so like...do I even need to explain? 

And then of course there's also this, the "Take care of yourself, Princess…" line. That is the last time Mari talks to Asuka and as much as that line alone already is so much, it's Mari's expression in particular that kills me. Because this? This soft, almost bittersweet expression she has, as she basically says goodbye? Because she knows Asuka will finally be happy and safe? It just makes me feel so much actually. Man.

In the end it's a fact that Mari loved Asuka, wether that is interpreted as platonic or romantic by someone is up to them. But it is a fact that Asuka was loved enough that someone wanted to hug her, was happy to see her, to praise her, was hurt by her loss, wanted her to be safe, that someone told her "Take care of yourself…" Asuka was really and honestly so loved that someone would tell her, "I missed you."

But Asuka? Asuka was too hurt, too wrapped up in her own head to actually see how loved she was by Mari (and other people) that she genuinely believed she's completely alone and always will be alone.

It makes the "Take care of yourself" line hit even harder to me, because it's not only Mari's goodbye, but it's a goodbye during the one time Asuka allowed herself to be vulnerable and admit what she really wanted.

And honestly? All of this? Its makes me feel so many things and I just love them  so much man.

[boldlyvoid]

Amoreena | chapter thirteen

Chapter Thirteen

main summary: Heaven is a real place and it's located exactly 14.6 miles away from the FBI, Quantico Headquarters. Off behind a small park, under a fantastical willow tree surrounded by wildflowers, in every colour young minds can imagine.

Don't forget, heaven also comes with angels.

Chapter Warnings: fluff like unbelievably fluffy!

word count: 6.1

here's the playlist for the fic, the last song in the playlist if looped will lead right into Amoreena at the beginning and it works pretty well timing-wise if you like to listen while you read !!

from the beginning <3

All their bags were packed by Friday morning, Y/N and Amoreena waking up extra early with excitement for the weekend ahead of them, and they didn’t even know what was going to happen yet.

Y/N made sure everything was packed and ready for a 3rd time on Saturday morning, right before they left on the trip; making sure they had sunscreen and aloe vera, all her medicine and ginger ale by the pack for her random bouts of morning sickness that lasted all, day, long... And their dresses and his suit hanging behind the driver's seat, beside Amoreena, they all piled into Y/N’s car and took off down the road on their adventure.

Amoreena was awake for the first half of the 9-hour trip, singing like crazy as they drove through Washington, Baltimore, Philadelphia and New York, it was so amazing she couldn’t stop cheering the whole time. It was more than she’s ever seen before, even though they lived so close to New York, she’s never been through it before.

Once they arrived in Rhode Island, Spencer pulled over at the closest gas station to make sure the girls were all prepared and ready for the big surprise he had for them. They filled the car, used the restroom and bought some lemonade before getting back into the car, he turned in the driver's seat to see Amoreena and Y/N better, looking at their wide eyes memorizing the calmness in their faces before he told them.

He didn’t want them to freak out too much, he was worried about Y/N’s blood pressure and how loud she might scream and any stress that a situation like this could put on her body. He’s seen how people react to Taylor Swift, he just didn’t know how they would.

“Now, I'm only telling you so you don't freak out," he repeated the same worry she had when she broke the news of the baby, "I didn’t have to rent a place on the water because my friend lives up here, so we’re going to stay in her guest house,” he explained it simply.

“Rossi's wife?” Y/N asked, confused about who it could be and if she knew this woman yet.

“No, actually I think you might know her, her name is Taylor?”

“No,” she shakes her head furiously, “no, nope, there's no way you did this, Spencer Walter Reid I am not kidding I’m going to pass away if I see her.” She's holding both her hands in fists as she tries to stay calm, closing her eyes quickly before letting out a deep sigh.

“Taylor who?” Amoreena yells, undoing her seatbelt and standing between their seats, she almost jumps into his lap as she leans over and grabs a fistful of his shirt, “Taylor WHO?”

“Go get in your seat and I’ll show you,” he teases, watching her follow orders and get back in the seat as quickly as possible, shouting at him to drive the second he hears the seatbelt click again.

Y/N is completely speechless for the next 20 minutes of the drive, eyes wide and a hand on her stomach as she stares out the front window. She’s like a statue, not able to hear anything Amoreena is saying but that doesn't stop her from going on and on with her stories.

“Mom!” She’s finally able to break her out of the haze, “pass me your phone!”

“Yeah,” she doesn’t even question it, handing her the phone back to the antsy 7-year-old so she could continue her internal panic.

They see her house on the hill as they approach, “holy shit,” Y/N whispers as Amoreena turns on the last great American dynasty, knowing exactly where they were going.

Taylor asked for his licence plate number and car model when they were emailing, letting her gate guy know to let Spencer right in so he could keep it a secret. But they knew the house, there was no point in not telling them. Y/N looked a little relieved that he gave her the time to freak out alone and not as soon as they crested the hill.

Her driveway felt never-ending as they got closer and closer, Amoreena was still in disbelief as she squealed in the back seat, hands flailing as she tried to calm the excitement inside her body with her favourite stim.

Then Taylor walked out into the front yard and Y/N was a mess. Crying as she waved her hand in front of her face, not wanting to be a mess in front of Taylor fucking Swift, “I told you nothing crazy! How did you do this?”

“Yes, but I said 'define crazy’ and you didn’t,” he reminds her with a cheeky smile.

She shoves him, “I didn’t think you could do this?!”

Once they’re parked the door automatically unlocked, and as much as spencer hated that non-safety feature, he's glad Amoreena can get out quickly before she's screaming bloody murder. Amoreena is out the door and in Taylor’s arms faster than they’ve ever seen her move, she should be a track star. It almost knocks Taylor to the ground as she takes her in, holding the sweet little girl against her chest with the biggest smile on her face. Amoreena snuggles right into her, with a hand on her cheek and her other arm wrapped behind her neck. She couldn't be any closer to her, it was like she was her favourite relative who she hasn't seen in a while.

Amoreena is talking her ear off already by the time Spencer’s helping Y/N out of the car and walking her to Taylor, she’s holding his hand like she’s going to pass out or something, “and this is my mom Y/N and my dad Spencer but somehow you know him already,” Amoreena introduces her.

“Hi, Y/N, it's a pleasure to meet you, Spencer's told me a lot about you.” Taylor’s sweet voice saying her name alone makes her stutter out a bunch of nonsense, not to mention the fact Spencer's been talking to Taylor fucking Swift about her.

Amoreena moves out of the way for Taylor to wrap her up in a hug, and Y/N cries harder than he’s ever seen on her shoulder, “thank you,” is all she can say, it’s frightening to Amoreena at first to see her mom cry like that but she knows her mom just loves Taylor like family.

What she doesn’t know is just how much Taylor saved her life. If she didn’t have someone to listen to, someone to take the pain and replace it with hope, she wouldn’t be here and by default neither would Amoreena. Spencer owed everything to Taylor swift at this point, she was a blessing in his life that he took for granted. Not realizing until that moment just how much she meant to him as well now.

“Sorry,” Y/N finally says as she pulls off her, “I’m pregnant, I can’t help it.”

Taylor’s hands fly right to her stomach, “holy crap, you never told me that she’s pregnant in your emails, oh my god!” She’s genuinely so happy for them, “how far along are you?”

“6 weeks on Sunday,” she smiles, feeling like herself again even though it’s incredibly strange to be telling Taylor before her parents even knew. “No one really knows, it’s all very new but when you know, you know… y’know?”

For a woman with an English language degree, she sure knew how to make a sentence, all of them laughing at the words she chose, but they understood.

“We should have used paper rings!” Amoreena yells, holding her hand over her eyes in disbelief as she shares her head with a sigh, she couldn’t believe she forgot that song existed.

It made Taylor laugh, scooping the little one up in her arms and starting the walk inside.

“Well come on in, I’ve got a big lunch spread ready for us and then we can go to the beach for the ceremony whenever you want this weekend, does that sound good?” Taylor is beyond excited to make new friends, much like Amoreena, they got along famously.

“Where are the cats? Do they live here or in LA or Nashville?” Amoreena changed the topic in the form of a yes and proving just how much she knew about Taylor.

“They’re here, Olivia and Benjamin will probably find us soon, Meredith isn’t very open to new friends now that she’s an old lady,” Taylor explained as she set Amoreena down in the entryway, bending down to be at her level and pointing off into the living room, “oh, see, there one is!”

Amoreena saw one of them laying on the floor under a sunny spot, running to it and petting it gently, “hi Benjamin, I loved you in the ME video,” she whispers as she pets him, making Taylor swoon.

“She’s amazing,” Taylor swooned, “I can’t wait to have one.”

“You should!” Y/N agreed, reaching to take Taylor's hand on impulse, and Taylor held it back with a smile, “oh that would be so wonderful, I can just imagine the beautiful stories you’ll create when you discover what it’s like to love someone how your mom loves you.”

Taylor’s smile was priceless, "that's the best way to think about it," she beamed at Y/N the way Spencer did, she had that effect on people. They followed her into the dining room, taking a seat near each other and digging into all the food Taylor made for them.

“Ah,” Amoreena said as she finally joined them, sitting on her knees on Taylors nice antique chairs. “Shark coochie,” she whispers the words to herself, not able to stop her mind from repeating it, but still not wanting Taylor to hear it in case it was inappropriate. She was incredibly well-mannered for someone who had a hard time reading social queues.

“It’s a hard word to say,” Taylor agreed, making her feel less awkward. Spencer may have told her about her autism in advance, wanting his little girl to be respected by everyone she met, for who she truly was, “my mom called it a coochie spread once, actually, she's going to be over tomorrow for father's day.”

"Yes! Oh, I love Andrea," Amoreena laughed at how cool this day was, smiling at Taylor the way she smiled at him that first morning at breakfast like she just found yet another person to love. “You’re so wonderful, Taylor.”

“Oh, thank you, you're pretty enchanting yourself,” she smiles, “I take it you’ve known about me for your whole life?”

“Yep,” she smiled, reaching for a chocolate-covered strawberry and taking a huge bite, covering her mouth before she continued, “I was born a month after Red came out, November thirteenth, it really is a lucky number now, mom says so at least.”

“It is!” Taylor agreed with a smile, “I have some markers, do you want to wear matching 13’s today?”

“Mom, can I colour on my hand?” She turns so fast Spencer thinks she’ll get whiplash.

“Yeah, go for it!” She agrees, spreading cream cheese on a croissant and layering tomatoes on top, definitely pregnant.

So Taylor gets a marker and both their left hands now have matching numbers. Amoreena asks to take a million photos, eventually just taking Y/N’s phone from her, permanently, to take photos of all her favourite things around the house.

She runs off with the cats at a certain point, giving Y/N a chance to thank Taylor without tiny ears listening in. “Can I get really emotional and tell you how much you mean to me or is that too weird for our first chat?”

“Not weird at all, knowing you’ve used my music to raise that beautiful child makes me love you just as much, I’d love to hear why you picked me, of all musicians, to show her how to love,” Taylor replies, as regal and kindly as humanly possible.

“My first fiancé, Stephen, he was actually like an angel and our first kiss was quite literally in the rain, but he passed away in 2010,” she explained it with a smile so Taylor knew it wasn’t a touchy subject anymore, “I bonded with Fearless in a way I can’t even describe to you, it’s my life, he was my superstar, and white horse, I mean come on, I can’t tell you how many times I cried to that after he died but it helped me not feel alone. I wouldn’t be who I am without Fearless, and then Speak Now was there for me when I needed a good cry, Last Kiss really broke me but it wasn’t until Lover came out that I realized I could find someone again, and it’s always just like you released things as I needed them like you were helping me through all the bad things,” she’s never even told Spencer all this, it was special to him that he got to give her this moment.

“When you re-released it with the vault songs, I met Spencer literally a month later. I cried my eyes out to you all over me, but That’s When makes me think of Spencer and now the whole album has a new memory in my heart that’s better. It's just like why you re-released it, to replace the bad things that happened that took all the happiness out of something you cared so much about." Y/N took a second to breathe, shaky as she got to the end of her rant that she seemed to have prepared in the 20 minutes before she had to talk to her.

"I love you, honestly. You’re my best friend and you didn’t even know me then, but you’ve held my hand through it all, so thank you,” she cried a little, holding her belly with one hand as she tried to hold the tears in.

Taylor was out of her chair and in Y/N’s arms within seconds, crying into her arms as she held her. She rubbed Y/N’s back as she cried too, “I’m so sorry that happened, but I’m glad I could be there.”

“Do you want to be this baby's godmother?” She asks on impulse without even asking Spencer if he’s okay with it, he was, it made him laugh.

“Eleonora Taylor Reid,” Spencer says from across the table, making them both turn to him with wide eyes.

“Yes,” Y/N agrees fast, “that's the name if it’s a girl, if it’s a boy he can be Taylor as well?”

“Holy shit,” Taylor smiled wide, “yes, I want to come to visit the farm and buy them baby gifts and throw you a baby shower! I inadvertently helped make them so it’s only fair.”

“Hopefully she gets your voice too, Y/N,” Spencer adds and Y/N shoots him a panicked glance, “it’s the Taylor legacy to be a good singer.”

“You can sing?” The question Y/N feared coming past Taylor's lovely vocal cords, almost on queue.

Y/N can't help but glare at spencer, he had too many tricks up his sleeve and she was at her limit.

“Yes,” Y/N finally answers, “I was going to go to theatre school, but I switched to become a Librarian, I’m not good with crowds or competition and that's basically what the industry depends on. I like the quiet, telling stories on paper is just as easy as singing it to a crowd.”

“That's fair,” Taylor agreed, “would you and Amoreena like to sing some song with me? I have my guitar or the piano? I’m not used to having new friends over without sharing at least 1 song with them. I’m sure you’ve seen my listening parties?” She was really trying to convince her to sing, Spencer knew why and what she had planned.

Amoreena came running in then, “I can play piano too, can we do the long live new year's day from the tour movie?” She rests her hands on Taylor's arm, looking up at her with the biggest puppy dog eyes.

“Of course, come on,” she says taking Amoreena’s hand and rushing into the piano room. “Here, we’ll record it too,” she offered, setting her phone up on the music stand to capture the moment forever.

They sat side by side on the bench, Amoreena showing her how she could play the opening perfectly and surprising Spencer. He knew they had a piano at home, he’s just never seen her play it before.

“She has perfect pitch,” Y/N bragged, “she can play a song after hearing it once.”

“Really?” Spencer had no idea, unbelievably proud of her as he listened to her play.

She’s quietly playing the intro to Long Live as Taylor watches, joining in with the harmony of New Year's Day, “this one reminds me of my mom and dad.”

“Does it?” Taylor coo’s, smiling at her softly as Y/N tries not to cry beside Spencer.

“They’re the knight and the princess of our kingdom,” she explained before the two of them started singing the words together, like they always have, only Taylor was beside her and not just on the TV.

“I said remember this moment, in the back of my mind, the time we stood with our shaking hands, the crowds in the stands went wild,” Amoreena’s tiny voice lead-in, fearlessly as she played away.

“We were the Kings and the Queens, and they read off our names, the night you danced like you knew our lives would never be the same... You held your head like a hero, on a history book page... It was the end of a decade, but the start of an age,” Spencer couldn’t help but cry as she sang with Taylor.

This was on the concert movie, he showed her after school, this song came on and she was silent, listening to the words as she stared at him and then back at the TV. Her mind was connecting little dots, making a story about her mom and dad being the king and the queen, it all made sense now.

“Long live the walls we crashed through, how the kingdom lights shined just for me and you, I was screaming long live, all the magic we made and bring on all the pretenders, I’m not afraid,

Long live all the mountains we moved, I had the time of my life, fighting dragons with you, I was screaming long live, that look on your face, and bring on all the pretenders, one day, we will be remembered,”

Their fingers moved in sync on the keys as they harmonized almost perfectly, she wasn’t kidding about Amoreena having perfect pitch. She knew all the words and sang them almost louder than Taylor.

“And hold on to spinning around, confetti, falls to the ground. May these memories break our fall…”

The piano changes, the cords softer as they move into a new song, smiling at her mom and dad like she knew something. She had no idea what happened the night of the fake wedding, just that they had a party without her.

“And hold on… To spinning around… Confetti… Falls to the ground…”

Spencer wraps his arms around Y/N then, resting his chin on her shoulder as they sway to the tune, she’s barely whispering the words beside him as she smiles as her baby.

“There's glitter on the floor after the party, girls carrying their shoes down in the lobby, candle wax and Polaroids on the hardwood floor, you and me from the night before, but… Don’t read the last page, but I stay when you're lost, and I'm scared and you're turning away. I want, your midnights, I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day,”

Y/N’s hands rest on top of Spencer’s, she squeezes them three times, right before the next lyric.

“You squeeze my hand three times in the back of the taxi, I can tell that it's gonna be a long road. I’ll be there if you're the toast of the town, babe, or if you strike out and you're crawling home,

Don't read the last page, but I stay, when it’s hard or it’s wrong or we’re making mistakes. I want, your midnights, but I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day,”

“Hold on, to the memories, they will hold on to you,” the two of them chanting along with Taylor in beautiful harmony, Spencer felt like he was in heaven among the angels, but for real this time. “And I will hold on to you…”

The piano is so soft, it’s just Amoreena’s fingers hitting them as Taylor goes silent, letting her take the lead with a soft smile, “Please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh, I, could recognize anywhere. Please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh, I, could recognize anywhere.”

They stop for just a moment for Amoreena to smile up at Taylor, just like the break in the concert, “I really do love you,” she reminds them all before playing again.

“We love you, too, sweet girl,” Taylor replies for them using the same nickname for her because it was the truth. She was the sweetest girl, that Amoreena.

“There's glitter on the floor after the party, girls carrying their shoes down in the lobby, candle wax and Polaroids on the hardwood floor. You and me forevermore, don't read the last page, but I stay when it’s hard or it’s wrong or we’re making mistakes and I want, your midnights, but I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day,”

“Hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you,” the girls all chant together, swaying back and forth to the rhythm before taking different parts in the song like they’ve planned it before.

“And Long live,” Taylor takes the one song, while Amoreena takes the other.

Please don't ever become a stranger…

The walls we crashed through..

Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere…

I had the time of my life

Please don't ever become a stranger…

With you…

Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere…"

Amoreena plays the rest, smiling wide at the best day of her life. Meaning every single word she’s saying. “And Long live, the walls we crashed through. I had the time of my life… With you…” Amoreena ends with a few extra notes, making Taylor smile as she held her in a side hug.

She turns back to the piano then, starting to play Amoreena by Elton John. “No way..” Y/N gasps, before getting ready to sing along with all the confidence in the world, alongside Taylor Swift of all people.

“It’s just that; Lately, I've been thinking, how much I miss my lady, Amoreena's in the hayfield, brightening the daybreak,” Taylor changes some of the words, much to Y/N surprise.

“Livin’ like a lusty flower, runnin’ through the grass for hours, rollin’ through the hay, oooh, like a puppy child! And when it rains, the rain falls down… washing out the cattle town… and she's far away somewhere… in her eiderdown… And she dreams of crystal streams, of days gone by when we would lean… Laughing, fit to burst, upon each other…”

Y/N turns to Spencer then, singing to him softly as she wraps her arms around him and sways her hips to the song, pressing against him like they were in the movie Dirty Dancing, something she’s always wanted to do, clearly, with the smile on her face as she sings.

“I can see you sittin’, eatin’, apples in the evenin’. Fruit juice, flowing slowly, slowly, slowly down the bronze of your body. Livin’, like a lusty flower, runnin’ through the grass for hours, rollin’ through the hay, oooh, like a puppy child.”

Amoreena’s voice was the loudest in the chorus, this was her song after all. She belted it out like it was made for her.

“And when it rains, the rain falls down! Washing out the cattle town! And she's far away somewhere… in her eiderdown! And she dreams of crystal streams, of days gone by! When we would lean, laughing, fit to burst upon each other…”

Spencer knew the words as well, who didn’t? It was Elton John's best song. He hugged Y/N, snuggling into the crook of her neck as they twirled in Taylor Swift's living room, swaying with her, forgetting they weren’t alone for a moment.

“Oh, if only I could nestle, in the cradle of your cabin. My arm's around your shoulder, oh… The window wide and open, while the swallow and the sycamore, whoa! Are playing in the valley. Oh, I miss you, Amoreena, like the king bee misses honey!”

“And when it rains, the rain falls down! Washing out the cattle town! and she's far away somewhere… in her eiderdown! And she dreams of crystal streams, of days gone by when we would lean! Laughing, fit to burst upon each other, oooh!”

Amoreena and Taylor playing the iconic piano solo together, Y/N can’t help but move in closer to watch over her little girls shoulders.

“Lately, I've been thinking… How much I miss my lady… Amoreena's in a cornfield, brightening the daybreak. Livin’, like a lusty flower! Runnin; through the grass for hours! Rollin’ through the hay, woah! Like a puppy, like a puppy, child…” Y/N’s voice loud enough to be on the recording Taylor was making as the song ended.

Taylor stopped it then, just as Y/N swore, “holy shit, that was the coolest thing that’s ever happened in my whole life.”

“Mom,” Amoreena looked at her like she broke the law or something, “you don’t swear in front of her…” she mumbled.

Taylor laughed, wrapping her up in another hug, “have you heard champagne problems? It’s okay for big kids to swear here,” she teased her.

They laughed like they were family like they’ve been there before and were always meant to return. Something just clicked with them, and without a doubt, they’d be returning. Taylor Swift of all people slipped right into their little life, filling the shoes of big sister, best friend and coolest aunt in the world all in one day.

It was the most perfect afternoon.

—

Just before the sunset, they all changed into their wedding attire. Meeting out on the beach for their small, extremely intimate wedding ceremony with miss Taylor Swift. Getting it out of the way so they could have the whole weekend for whatever Taylor had planned for them. She said she had a few surprises up her sleeve still.

They filled out all the paperwork required on Taylor's kitchen table beforehand, she had all the right documents from when she registered to ordain online. All they had to do was submit it at town hall and they’d be legally married.

But it didn’t matter to them, this was enough.

Taylor and Amoreena stood side by side at a homemade arch on the beachfront that Taylor owned, waiting patiently for Spencer and Y/N to walk down the fake aisle, hand in hand. They couldn’t stop smiling as they saw Amoreena at the end, a big smile on her face as she bounced with excitement.

They reached the end, turning to each other, Amoreena took Y/N’s bouquet, it was her duty as maid of honour and best man.

“Spencer and I have been emailing for 2 weeks about today, he’s been filling me in little by little about you both as he got to know you, I’ve really gotten to see his love for you in the form of letters,” Taylor described with a large smile on her face.

Y/N looks at him with an open mouth, shocked as she shakes her head in disbelief at him. “You’re kidding, is she who emailed you when we had lunch 2 weeks ago?”

Spencer nodded with another cheeky smile, “she emailed me as you told me not to plan anything too crazy.”

Y/N just laughed at the insanity, “sorry Taylor, please continue.”

“It’s okay,” she laughed along, “it’s actually kind of interesting how Amoreena picked long live and New Year’s Day to sing because from what I’ve learned about you both, the intermission poem from that tour really was written for you, somehow. Almost like by design or some violent, exquisite happenstance…”

Y/n’s eyed do that thing they always do when she’s remembering something she’s heard before, finding the exact filing cabinet in her mind and opening it. She finds the words.

“When she fell, she fell apart. Cracked her bones on the pavement she once decorated as a child with sidewalk chalk,” she starts the poem with a small nod, letting Taylor continue the monologue in the form of vows.

“When’s she crashed, her clothes disintegrated. And blew away with the winds that took all of her fair-weather friends, family and lovers. When she looked around her skin was spattered with ink. Forming the words of a thousand voices, echoes she heard even in her sleep: whatever you say, it is not right. Whatever you do, it is not enough. Your kindness is fake. Your pain is manipulative.”

Y/N hasn’t watched the concert recently, unlike Spencer. She didn’t realize how much it sounded like them. Spencer, however, spotted the coincidences the second he heard it that night with Amoreena. Telling Taylor, explaining in detail how Maeve and Stephen were their personal last kiss storylines, but they’ve found a lover in each other. Cheesy, but it was the best way he could describe it.

“When she lay there on the ground she dreamed of time machines and revenge. And a love that was really something. Not just the idea of something.”

She turned her attention to Spencer, replacing the pronouns to fit him for the next part, Y/N looked at him already knowing why, smiling as she made the connection in her mind.

“When he finally rose, he rose slowly. Avoiding old haunts and sidestepping shiny pennies. Wary of phone calls and promises, charmers, dandies and get-love-quick-schemes.

When he stood, he stood with a desolate knowingness, waded out into the dark wild oceans up to his neck. Bathed in his brokenness. Said a prayer of gratitude, for each chink in the armour he never knew he needed.

Standing broad-shouldered next to him, was a love that was really something. Not just the idea of something.

When they turned to go home, they heard echoes of new words: may your heart remain breakable but never by the same hand twice. And even louder: without your past, you could never have arrived so wondrously and brutally, by design or some violent, exquisite happenstance… here.”

“What she said,” Y/N says with a quick giggle, leaning in as she laughs, taking him down in a giggle fit with her.

Amoreena’s lightly tugging on Taylor’s dress then, “you have to say it, please you can’t not say it, I had this planned out before I even knew you’d beee here…” she whispers like Taylor has any clue what she’s talking about.

Y/N just starts to shake her head with a smile, “I think she means the speak now bridge,” she reminds her.

“Ahh,” she smiles, picking Amoreena up to be at eye level with them all, she sings. “I hear the preacher say speak now or forever hold, your, pee-E-eeace,” she sings it exactly like it is on the album, almost as if she’s been practicing to release it again…

“There’s the silence there’s my last chance, I stand up with shaking hands all eyes, on me,” Amoreena lightly signs right back. “Horrified looks from everyone in the room but I’m only looking at you!”

Spencer laughs then too, smiling at his little girl living out the fantasy of a lifetime, seeing her mom dressed like a princess and marrying the broken knight with rusty armour, while Taylor Swift of all people holds her. Nothing about the life they had together felt real, but he wouldn’t change it for the world.

“I think it’s only fair if I get a say in who marries my mom because I’ve known her the longest,” she adds, “and I’m not the kind of girl who should be rudely barging in on this white veil occasion, but you happen to be the best dad in the whole world, so I think it’s cool that you love my mom.”

Y/N lets out a choked sob, she clearly had no idea that Amoreena was planning to say all that, but of course, she was. She knew all about every single Disney princess wedding, every fairytale ending and happily ever after, Taylor has helped her learn about love and vows and true feelings that cannot be stopped.

She knew what to say and she meant every word.

Spencer reaches out to take Amoreena from Taylor, holding her in his arms instead as Y/N snuggled in close to them, both his girls in his arms.

“I think it’s only fair I give some vows to you as well, I’m committing my whole life to this family, you should know how much that means I love you, too, Amoreena.” She snuggles in closer to his neck as she holds him back, Y/N’s head resting on his other shoulder.

“Till the day I die, I am going to be here for you: with unconditional love, with the best stories and the best morning cuddles. I don’t care if you pull me out of bed at 5 in the morning to feed the goats, or the chickens or just because you think the sun looks pretty and want me to see it too. I love you Amoreena, you’ve completed my life."

"Do you remember that day you asked me to be your dad?” his voice is so soft as he bumps her cheek with his nose.

She wipes her tears as she pulls away from his shoulder, overly emotional at the events of the day and extremely tired from the excitement she let out earlier. She nods softly, “I meant it.”

“I know honey,” he can’t help but start to cry a little as well, dropping his manly facade and being real with her. She deserved to see exactly what she meant to him, “I watched you pouring glitter glue all over that table, making the biggest mess ever, but it made me think… I had a hole in my heart for so many years, there was a part of me missing for so, so, so long, and then I found a little Eden by beautiful little kingdom, and the fairest lady in all the land took me in, and she patched up my broken heart with glitter glue.”

Amoreena tried to smile the tears away, sniffling as she tried to nod, “that's how I felt when you told me I could pick you to be my dad.”

Y/N was a sobbing mess, having to crouch down to her knees as she let it all out, steadying herself by holding onto Spencer’s leg like a child would at that height, “is she okay?” Amoreena worried.

“Your mom loves us so much, and the baby does too, so it’s making her a bit more emotional than normal,” he explains, wishing he could scoop Y/N up and hold her as well.

She wipes the tears from her face as she calms herself down and stands back up with help from Taylor, “thank you,” she manages to whisper to her with a smile.

She’s also been crying, watching the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen. A family built on true love coming together, using her songs to form a bond that she’d never understand.

And she didn’t want to, some stories were best kept in families, to be sent down the line, generation after generation, to fall into the lap of someone like her one day and create a whole world with it.

“With the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband, wife and daughter, the royal Reid family,” Taylor’s voice is soft as she plays along with Amoreena’s fantasy land, hushed to match the moment as Spencer leaned in to kiss Y/N.

Amoreena doesn’t cry out in disgust this time, instead, resting her head on her dad's shoulder as she watched them peck each other's lips gently. Watching a fairytale happy ending unfold in front of her very eyes, blessed to be the result of this happy union.

...

A/N: my anon is on now if anyone wants to come talk about the fic with me!! i love to share little hc's and things with you over here (also this was the original planned ending I wasn't going to continue past here but I'm probably going to write this for the next 10 years its too fun not to)

tag list: @shemarmooresfedora @spencers-dria @spookyspence @reidsfish @manuosorioh @mochionly @samuel-de-champagne-problems @jswessie187

[bougiebutchbitch]

Hi hi!! :D ahh this is the anon who messaged u a few weeks (or months? What the hell is the passage of time) ago saying i never have time to read fics but I will 100% always try make time for yours and yours ONLY because your writing is so phenomenal I would read literally ANYTHING that you write!! And I said I was gonna read Crawling Back to You and I finally FINALLYYY got to read the first two chapters and AGHHHH ITS SO GOOD ITS SO GOOOOOOD!!!

I wanted to let you know that i appreciate all the hard work and love you put into your words! I had a rly stressful work shift but reading those two chapters helped me look forward to something!! And it helped me get thru the day so much easier!! So thank u!!! You have no idea how happy I am to see that there’s a realistic portrayal of Starscream being absolutely terrible and bitter and awful even to people who saved his life. The writing just feels much more realistic to canon and it’s so refreshing to see a slowburn with emphasis on SLOW redemption fic for Starscream, because this guy has spent millions of years being insufferable, he isn’t gonna stop anytime soon and I love how you write his perspective on things!! Scheming little bastard who still went through hell so he’s still skittish from the events of the third season and the movie but he still has that bravado and confidence that we loved to see from the earlier seasons and you manage to mix it together and make the PERFECT Starscream. Ughhh I’ve never read anyone else write him as perfectly as you do!!! and the way you describe injuries? The way you describe emotions?? Even little movements like the way someone gestures to someone else by lifting their chin a certain way or how you describe their voice hitching or!! Or how a transformer fuckin!!! TRANSFORMS!!! I always love how you write them it’s like I can practically hear the khh-ch-chk-chk bOOM!! I literally sit at my desk whispering “oh my goshhh you’re so cool” out loud at the screen as if the characters could hear me LMAO I just have a really REALLY good time reading your stuff!!

ALSO I am very much thoroughly enjoying your oneshots that you write, for the other fandom!! The one with the WLWs. I forget the fandom name and I may not know who the characters are exactly but YOUR WRITING IS LIKE FOOD, A DELICIOUS BUFFET OF GLORIOUS WORDS, thank you for feeding your audience. Anyway I just really wanted to say I love your writing and it helped me get through a very difficult work week so!!! Thank you!!! 🥰💖💖💖🌟🌸💕✨

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anon

ANON

NONNIE

holy shit what an incredible comment <3

I remember you! And I am truly touched to my heart. I have this terrible affliction where I see characters like Starscream and (don't judge meeee) Loki, who take the genuine, horrible abuse they've suffered as a reason to be utterly shitty to others, and go:

'You. I get you. I don't agree with you, but god, I fucking get it.'

I'm very much of the opinion that no character, no matter how awful, is 'irredeemable', even if they are 'unforgivable'. Not to get all Optimus Prime up in here, but every person has the capacity to change for the better. However, while being supported on that path sure helps a lot, the people these characters have harmed owe them absolute jack shit. 

It's a really interesting line to walk, between 'Starscream has been through A Lot and you can understand his warped worldview if you dig into his psyche', and 'Starscream is an imperialistic, supremacist douchecanoe who, through his desperate attempts to grasp power, has ruined pretty much every relationship he's ever had and killed a whole bunch of people'.

So... yeah! I really wanted to dig into redemption arcs with this fic, through the medium of my favourite angry bird, without vindicating or demonising him, or any other character (except Megatron... sorta... Even that's horribly complicated from Starscream's perspective, as abusive relationships often are).

It was really important to me that this fic would be, as you say, slow to the point of gruelling! Starscream has been Certified Awful for millennia; he's not gonna wake up tomorrow and realise that the drones he's been treating like shit his entire military career are actually sapient beings who deserve far better than his ‘leadership’.

He's self-obsessed, neurotic, paranoid, arrogant, and has the worst case of Chronic Backstab Syndrome in fiction, to the point where he's a TV Trope.

And I fucking LOVE him.

Anyway, THANK YOU for giving me the excuse to screech about one of my favourite characters ever. I'm so glad you found time to read, and that this story helped brighten a bad week! AND THAT YOU COULD PICTURE THE TRANSFORMATION SCENES SO VIVIDLY OKAY - they are my favourite thing to write! Peak badass.

Anywaaaay. One day I'll actually update again, lmao. I really appreciate this comment, friendo!

in other news, I’m so happy that you like my Critical Role lesbians! They mean so much to meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[idlecreature]

the buried fic comment from hell (it's so long i'm SO SORRY, I GOT EXCITED)

DEL.. I WASN’T SURE IF IT WAS APPROPRIATE TO LEAVE A LONG ASS COMMENT ON UR BURIED FIC IN PUBLIC….. SO I’M DROPPING IT HERE i’m so sorry in advance this is about to be a mess,, i’m so fucking emotional right now

((the review under the cut is in response to my fic which can b read here))

okay first –

The mental image of tiny gangly Barnabas and Jonah crouched with their hands in the dirt….. is so fucking cute?? I could feel Jonah’s jealousy just burning off of him. You had me right away. Fuck. You know how to open a story and I’m deeply envious, I’ve always struggled with it. Also, you threw in that little hook:

Despite what Jonah believes, there are some things that just can’t be explained in words.

Barnabas’ voice is so fucking good… guh… you know. I didn’t much care about Barnabas in any deep way before I joined the Jonah server and you guys have all just completely GUTTED me, I can’t believe how much I care about this highly-strung bastard,, he is so GOOD. HE’S SO GOOD???? HE’S SUCH A SWEETIE. LIKE. BARNABAS FEELING GUILTY AND HORRIFIED THAT PEOPLE ARE GRATEFUL TO HIM AND WANT HIM AROUND???? AAAAAAAAAA. And the melancholy aspect, too, which I imagine is how Mordechai was able to relate to him, get attached to him… Barnabas being bitter about how useless his tears are while he’s crying anxiously at the prospect that he might not be able to help those families after all…….

All of those scraps of Barnabas’ letter to Jonah made such EXCELLENT transitions, holy hell. Again I am inspired by your storytelling prowess. I am taking notes, for whenever my ability to write longform fic returns from war. This one was my favorite, made my heart clench:

A good world starts with a good person and a few choices that are made with the heart—

He’s so earnest I’m going to weep ;_; Barny.. you can’t make Jonah a better person he’s AWFUL,,

(Side note, super digging that I can indent stuff, block quoting makes this SO much easier.)

Also really digging that Jonah doesn’t have as nice a reputation as Barnabas… Jonah is the bad influence friend lmfao. AND JONAH’S CAT… I LOVE HIM…

And then you delivered a swift blow straight to the religion kink, as promised… “There’s something undeniably old testament about Jonah; the fire and fury of creation, the self-annihilating stare of Lot’s wife.“ LOSING IT I’M LOSING IT… WHAT A WAY OF DESCRIBING HIM God, here I thought I couldn’t possibly be more attracted to this bastard man. I am aghast at myself.

LOSING IT EVEN MORE OVER BARNABAS STACKING TEACUPS ON JONAH’S HEAD???? Why must you make them so fucking cute oh NO this is going to hurt isn’t it. ((This was the note I stuck in the Word doc while I was reading it and I thought I’d leave it as was for your enjoyment))

“Taking cues from your dreams?” Barnabas replies. “You know only the desperately mad do that?” 

“Or desperately inspired—savants and prophets and visionaries.”

And then you continued to try to kill me… Jonah thinking of himself as a prophet……. hhhhh canon-typical overambitious zealotry I’m HERE FOR IT………

“Are you trying to make me angry with you by playing the devil’s advocate?” 

“Just testing you,” Jonah says in his alloyed voice, silver-and-honey-gold. 

Del I cannot stress enough… My religion kink………. It’s been SO VERY ACTIVATED.

“Your morality has only ever been a thin cover for your shame.”

OUCH, JONAH, JESUS

Every bit of their dialogue was so familiar and tinged with bittersweetness and I owe you my entire life… Sincerely. Ugh. Like, how you described Barnabas’ internal angst about it later on – when he’s thinking of Mordechai, and he refers to "his many dog-eared fantasies” about Jonah it just really vividly conjured the thought of he and Jonah having a sort of? Queer solidarity, ESPECIALLY having grown up together. And that makes Jonah’s flash of betrayal at Barnabas not wanting to be SEEN with him that much more agonizing, personally. Like. I’ve had that happen to me more than once in real life. And much as Jonah is a piece of shit who is absolutely manipulating him………. still, ouch. Ouch. (Barnabas’ thoughts on the company Jonah keeps also made me wince. You did an AMAZING job with all of the internalized shame and frantic rationalizations, hooooooboy.)

The Lukases being colorblind is such an interesting piece of lore by the way I love it????? Now I have. Some questions, about Peter. Mordechai’s characterization in this is so fascinating to me. I’m enTRANCED by how you reverse-Uno’d it so that Barnabas was the reason Mordechai lost himself to the Lonely… the power dynamics……. so tasty. Ugh. And all of the sensual descriptions, especially of that first visit Barnabas had at Moorland house?? I didn’t clip any because I would have ended up clipping the whole fucking thing. It was aching, haunting, beautiful, holyshit. Their romance is somehow more fucked up than Barnabas and Jonah’s…

Also, I was so eager to read this I skipped the tags/warnings and completely didn’t realize Mordechai was going to be an actual vampire so that was a VERY fun surprise lmfao.

Barnabas feels like he’s close to learning something about violence and desire, how close they are, how the wires can get crossed.

THIS QUOTE IS EVERYTHING TO MEEEEEE ugh I’m having an aneurysm over how Jonah managed to fashion Barnabas into a creature that could understand him by gifting him to Mordechai for a while… letting Mordechai crack him open at the points where he was already brittle and experience an influx of some of the true darkness of the world. Just a tasty taste. That way when he discovers the truth of Jonah’s occult interests he won’t run away, because he’s already got his own fingers in the mess. He’s already given himself to one horror, why not Jonah? Shave some of the shine off of his morality, make him nice and gray so he won’t contrast so much with Jonah… And satisfying his curiosity at the same time. Two birds.

Oh, also, still sobbing about this line:

he realises that he doesn’t want to wear any colours that Mordechai can’t properly see.

EVERY TIME I let my guard down for ten seconds you smacked me with more of Barnabas being the most precious bleeding heart in the universe!!!!!! He aches so much for the people he’s trying to help and he hates people like Mordechai but part of him also wants to save Mordechai, somehow… maybe recognizes the parts of him that are like these people, still. Nearly faded but not quite gone yet. And as you’ve already established, Barnabas simply cannot let things go. Can’t disappoint people… can’t leave them when he could be doing something. Anything. Augh, FEELINGS.

Of course he knew Mordechai and Jonah were friends, he’d just temporarily believed in a sane and fair universe where things like this don’t happen. 

AND YOU HAD SUCH A PERFECT BALANCE OF HUMOR… This could have been such a feelbad fic, and tbh it still would have been spectacular. But you always eased it at just the right moment to keep it from going off the rails into irretrievable deepdark territory. Fed me little soft moments so I’d still be vulnerable enough to have my HEART RIPPED OUT LATER…

I’m not super interested in the Buried canon-wise but I love how you’ve written Barnabas’ natural affiliation with it… so subtle but powerful? (Of COURSE Jonah was jealous, lmao. He had to work so hard and he’s still not on Barnabas’ level. There’s some kinda beautiful commentary on ambition versus goodwill in there somewhere but I’m too busy nursing my battered little heart right now to articulate it.) It wove its way in and out of the rest of the plot so naturally, too. For some reason it compliments Barnabas’ temperament as I read it in canon just… so well. Was there a discussion about this on the server, and if so, PLEASE tell me about it sometime I’m so fascinated.

Jonah wasn’t even present for a lot of the fic but his characterization was so INTENSE and luminous, Christ… I know I already praised it a bit but. Woof. I wasn’t expecting to get a taste of his POV at the end and I was so excited I kicked my feet (my cat was very disgruntled) like, this line!!!

Now, he thinks there’s some truth in those false statements, in the lies we tell and why we want to be believed.

GOD, YOU’RE REALLY GONNA GIVE ME FEELINGS ABOUT JONAH AND FUTURE-JONAHLIAS IN THE SAME FIC?????? EVIL… I’m so so so fucking here for it, oh my God, Jonah with an amplifying anxiety disorder, THE PRICE OF IMMORTALITY… too bad the Eye doesn’t let you see the future, Jonah, lmao… the line “immortality just made his anxiety turn nuclear” is SEARED into my brain now, I am NOT accepting canon to contradict this ever again. I’ve always wondered how Jonah’s neuroses might have worsened in two entire fucking CENTURIES and I love the way you wrote it. I am fucking. Losing my mind.

There’s so many other things I could comment on, like. The brief but glorious Jonah-grinding-himself-off-on-Barnabas’-thigh shenanigans. Was incredibly hot, and Mordechai’s poor fragile heart breaking, and Barnabas telling Isabel that it’s fine to call him Barny…….. I’m hhhhhhhhHHHH fuck, fuck, fuck. I’m just!! I am incomprehensible!!! Everyone told me this fic was amazing but it’s fucking amazing, Del, what the hell. I’m never gonna be the same after this. The end was SHOCKINGLY sweet and I have WHIPLASH.

………… So, now that I’ve made you read a novel. Hah. Sorry. My point is. I loved every bit of this. It deserved heaps more praise but my eyes are starting to cross. Thx for sharing :’) 

Love,

Tony xx

TONY. TONY THIS MEANS EVERYTHING TO ME. FIRSTLY I’M SO GLAD YOU LIKED THIS. SECOND OF ALL, THANKS TO YOU I’LL BE SCREAMING FROM THE ROOFTOPS FOREVER HAVE YOU ANY IDEA HOW THIS REVIEW HAS AFFECTED ME? IT’S THE BEST FEEDBACK I’VE EVER RECIEVED IN MY LIFE I FEEL LIKE A FIRSTGRADER GETTING THEIR FIRST GOLD STAR I FEEL ON TOP OF THE WORLD LIKE I COULD THROW THE JEWEL OF THE SEA OFF THE SHIP AND LEAN OVER THE RAILINGS BECAUSE YOUR ARMS ARE AROUND ME TONY IT’S BEEN MONTHS AND THIS REVIEW HAS BEEN A FIREPLACE KEEPING ME WARM THROUGH THE WINTER MONTHS I LOVE YOU DEARLY FOR THIS YOU ARE AN ABSOLUTE CHAMPION IF YOU WERE IN FRONT OF ME RIGHT NOW I WOULD FRENCH KISS YOU WITHOUT HESISTATION UNTIL THE BOTH OF US HAVE RUN OUT OF AIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCKING BLESS YOU TONY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

[zuffer-weird-girl]

Hello! I'm not sure if you're still accepting requests but can I ask for a little imagine where Overhaul got hit by a De-aging quirk and his s/o basically had to take care of him? I just thought it would sound cute :D thank you so much! I just really love how you write Overhaul!

I always looked for something like this and now I am the one writing it... please I cant be the only one...

You heard Kurono's voice mumble something that you couldn't catch at first but you could at least understand that one thing was that he in pain.

You slowly walked through the yakusa's house and this time you could understand Chrono's words.

"What do you want me do to about it? Hide you behind a curtain-? OW!" He cursed some words while you catched Mimic's voice as well.

"Mimic? Chrono?" You entered before knocking.

Both men jumped and turned their front to you, Mimic up on the desk of your boyfriend's office while Chrono standed right behind with both arms behind his back.

"Good afternoon (Y/N)." Both said innocently in union.

"Good afternoon...?" You arched a eyebrow at their suspicious behavior "Would you mind telling me where Overhaul is? I haven't seen him all the morning..."

"So. There was a-" Chrono hitted the back of Mimic's head after making a pained expression like he was hurted as well.

"He is probably out, maybe taking a break from work (Y/N)."

"Ok?" You spoke uncertainly "Tell him I'm looking for him if he comes back?" Both nodded.

When you left office Kurono gulped down his swear.

"MOTHERFU-" Mimic fell from the table to the ground when the object instantly overhauled.

"I forgot how strong you were, even on that form." Said Chrono rubbing his ankle.

Chisaki groaned as his now tiny hands rubbed his hair as he got up from his hidden spot on his desk.

One hero in training just was out of control with their teacher's training, and their quirk just blasted him. Now there he was, a young adult caged on a five to six years old child body...

"This must be a nightmare..." growled Chisaki while Mimic stiffled a snicker at hearing Overhaul's voice.

"I still don't understand why you refuse to let (Y/N) see you Chisaki, honestly." Chisaki deadlanned at his friend before answering.

"Look at me. Not even both of you are taking me serious right now, imagine them. This is humiliating..."

"Overhaul, not wanting to be rude or anything but the chick haven't saw you naked or so-" Mimic was punched in the face by Chisaki which made the poor dude went flying to the wall.

He send a glare to Chrono, whose only put both of his hands up in defence.

"The brat has his strength, holy shit." Spilled blood Mimic.

~

You walked through the halls again after taking a shower; and sadly, your boyfriend apparently hadn't returned, so you just went to his office to leave one note, wishing him good night if he didn't returned to bed.

When you went to push the door your heard a faint childish voice saying out loud a 'goddammit' coming from inside his office which startled you for bit. Slowly you pushed the door and peaked through to confirm that you weren't paranoid.

Balancing on one foot in the chair and one arm trying to reach your boyfriend's plague mask, was a dark brown haired boy dressed in a black blouse too wide for his size.

"Dammit why did I put this thing so high?" Mumbled the kid once again.

Wait... is that?

Suddenly he lost his balance and started to wave his arms in favor to recuperate it but it was too late as the chair itself falled.

"SHIT!"

You threw yourself on your knees and grabbed the child before he could collide with the ground as you blocked with your body the falling plague mask that probably was going to hit his head.

That hurted. This damn mask is heavy, how can Kai use this thing?!

You had your supposed idea confirmed when the boy oppened his eyes slowly looking up with the familiar golden eyes that you came to love.

His eyes widened as he tried to squirm out of your arms but you bold him firmly in your chest.

"Kai, is that you? Or some little intruder which appears too much with my boyfriend as a child?" You asked sarcastically already knowing the answer.

Thanks Pops.

Chisaki eyes were burning from a second; he felt so humiliated... before he had the knowledge, one or two tears formed in his eyes but wouldn't fall.

"Oh god! Did you get hurt? Are you okay?" You checked carefully his face even having almost sure that he wasn't affected by the fall.

"No." He mumbled as he covered his eyes in shame. Fucking hell those childish humors.

"Kai." You cooed heloing him to his feet "What happened? Was it a quirk?" He nodded quietly still refusing to take his hands away from his face.

"Love please talk to me." You approached your hands to his "Can I?"

As much as he wanted to order you to go away or to simpky say no, he nodded, feeling your gentle touch on his fragile skin, taking away his only shield from this embarrassing and humiliating situation.

"Do you know how much it will last?" You asked gently.

"Chrono made a research and found that the effect only last for one day or a few hours. But it has been already more than few hours." He spoke impatiently and in anger.

You hummed in understatement already planning on something to lift his spirits for a bit.

He notice that you were staring at him when he finally took the courage to look into your eyes, and he scoffed in annoyance as he frowned.

"What? You're going to tell how pathetic I look? How weak or something like that?" He growled and immediately regret it when he heard the humiliating sound that came from him.

You smilled, trying not to giggle as you shook your head.

"No, I just found you cute."

"Go to the hell." He mumbled as he crossed his arms and tried to hide a blush on his face.

It was much difficult in this form he was now.

"Ok ok sorry! Not cute!" You putted your hands up in defence but soon notice the way he clenched his arms as he gulped.

"Hey" you picked his attention "What about we just stay on our room? Just eat something and relax." He arched an eyebrow at you and pointed at himself up and down.

"With me like this?"

"Why not? It's still you right? My boyfriend. Overhaul. Kai Chisaki himself isn't it?" He seemed to relax at your words before sighing and went walking in your front.

"Do what you wish..." he stopped at the front door locking uo before sighing again.

"(Y/N)..." he silently begged your help which you quickly got up and oppened the door for him to pass.

So tiny...

You both just stayed talking and sometimes eating the things you brought to his room; he threatened to make you clean the entire base if you let even a single grit fall on the sheets which you only laughed nodding.

He ended up spilling juice on the griund though. Tiny angry little bird wasn't happy....

Asides that accident, both of you didn't really cared much about the whole situation which Chisaki was relieved because you didn't treat him any different just because of his size or appearance.

Although it didn't even reach 8 p.m and he felt his eyes starting to grow heavy on the middle of a card game that you had suggested...

"Felling tired my love?" You asked seing his head falling then suddenly jerking back up again.

"No.." he mumbled "Go fish." He yawned as he out his own mass of cards om the bed for a moment before blinking fervently the sleep and looking at his cards again.

... it wasn't even that game you were playing.

You giggled, guarding all of the cards; including his besides his prostests; and neatly put it back in the little box.

"I'm felling a little sleepy hon, want to call night?" You lied to at least try to convince your stubborn boyfrie d to lay down as well.

"If you insist..." he yawned again before getting closer to you as he layed down.

You immitaded his actions, you turned off the light in your room and arranged the covers over both of you.

It only passed a few seconds before you felt a slightly tug on the collar of your shirt. You oppened your eyes to meet golden ones staring at you, filled with the desire to sleep.

"Something wrong Kai?" He seemed in thought for a moment before snuggling closer in your neck.

"It's cold." He simply stated as he hugged your form. Right blame the temperature Chisaki...

You smiled and carresed his hair for a bit, although when you stopped Chisaki seemed to move his head against your palm repeatedly as he let out some longer sighs, making you giggle and return your actions on his hair.

"Angel?" he sleepy called which you responded humming "I... never had this in my life so... it feels... nice."

Those last words stroked straight into your core as you widened your eyes in surprise, but when you looked down Chisaki was already passed out on your chest.

You felt your heart shattered at his sleep deprived confession... no wonder he was like this...

What had he passed through exactly before the yakusa...?

You only could sleep by two in the morning and couldn't even stay long as you woke up four hours later, feeling the much heavier body pressed into your chest.

You smiled as you saw your boyfriend in his normal appearance peacefully sleeping...

Maybe you would ask about that later, for now you were just going to admire this handsome devil in his kost rare moment...