#HE CANT TWEET | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

idsb · 2 years

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B*g Br*ther stans are literally the stupidest people alive I’m sorry

#i tweeted like ‘this account is impersonating me’ and since the account is impersonting my BROTHER #(who cant tweet bc hes in the BB house)#and pretending i hacked him to tweet #everyones yelling at me for lying and pretending that my bros whole account is impersonating me #and calling me a ‘bitch on meth’ for trying to get his account taken down #and now theyre all reporting MY twitter #and then ‘his’ account was like SIKE ITS MATT I MADE THT UP #and theyre all praising how funny it is #WHEN ITS NOT EVEN HIM THEY TAKE YOUR FUCKING PHONE AWAY TO BE IN THE HOUSE #HE CANT TWEET #THE ACCOUNT ISNT VERIFIED AND THE UN IS SPELT WRONG #and all its doing is GAINING him fans #this is so triggering nd infuriating #oh and its really funny because #half my mentions are like #‘does this bitch hang out with amber heard?#oh the woman who was abused and hung for filth and mocked half to death because she wasnt a ‘good enough’ victim and she accused someone #whose on tv and good at faking likeability???#NOOoOoo

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lavb-b · 3 months

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Canon, I think.

#yeah its a reference to that one tweet?tumblr post? cant remember #guy bout to be kissed and he throws his hands up all YIPEE #zelink #skyward sword #legend of zelda #SS zelink #RAAA I LOVE SS ZELINK #Lavdoods_vb

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bruciemilf · 1 year

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DC can shoot blockbuster movies, but only WFA is genius enough to introduce PTA mom! Bruce who's extremely competitive.

I need Battinson, youngest parent there by far, to roll in, smudged make up, bruises, a busted red lip.

No one thinks to link those marks to Batman. They're OBVIOUSLY evidence of a long night of fooling around in the club instead of caring for his young ward

Margie thinks that's funny, seeing as this guy obviously doesn't get out much. She tried putting him through the trial of Intimidating Mom Show Off and he just said, " I'm going to cry in the bathroom. Excuse me."

I'm sorry, but Bruce being openly affectionate with Dick, Jason, Damian, Cass, and Tim, -- kisses on the cheek, hugs that last until the teacher breaks them off, - would have the fathers cringing.

" Haha, I don't do that with my kids. I'm actually here because my wife bitched at me."

Bruce, straight up, " Don't you like your children?"

" Excuse me?!"

" Not yet. Why do you hate your kids?"

" I love my kids, I just can't wait to get away from them. Come on, you know how it's like."

" No. I love my babies. Why do you hate your babies? Why do you hate your wife. I'll pay for your divorce if you want."

Bruce gets reported VERY often to the principal and board for being inappropriate, and you know what? They refuse to do anything. It was about time someone raised hell around here.

Duke, age 8, watching a grown man throw a tantrum because Bruce called Dick 'baby' : Bruce. I can poke him with my sword

Bruce: Not yet, Duke

Jason tries exploding every kid he doesn't like with his mind. "Trust me, you won't like the alternative. Now be gone! My papi brought me lunch." It's a lunchbox full of books.

Bruce gets along the best with the mothers. They treat him like the class hamster

#bruce wayne #dc #batman #batdad #batfam #duke thomas #jason todd #jason uses Shakespeare language send tweet #text #let harley and martinez and selina be his back up for when he cant manage to come. someone makes the mistake of muttering #' whole family's a bunch of freaks' and harley does not hesitate okay. pull that bitch in the street and beat their ass #in front of their kids. do them dirty. in front of they bloodline #text post

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livelovecaliforniadreams · 1 year

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#No No It’s Not

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your-local-granny · 3 months

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i know there's many interpretations of klapollo and they're all valid or whatever all are welcome to dine at the lords table ect ect but to ME. it is integral that:

a) apollo doesn't give a single shit that klavier is famous and

b) that apollo isn't insecure abt his looks

because if you don't have that then it's just a 1directioner insert fic which. I can accept but it's hard for me to return to those grade school recess conversations in full sincerity. and if you DO have those things then klapollo is the greatest modern successor to roger and jessica rabbit

#i don't mean that he doesnt think klavier is hot. OBVIOUSLY he does thats canon #but he cant be intimidated by the gavineers fame and/ or actively disparaging his own looks bc thats just sad imo #that corviiids tweet about 'im sure the red carpet will think ur JC pennys suit is as charming as i think it is' 'no i know that'#THATS THE DYNAMIC OKAY #sorry i feel like im huffing carbon monoxide rn #okay anywyas #klapollo #aa #aa meta #aj #klapollogies #portal of rambling

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merry-fagoland · 10 months

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ive been unable to stop thinking about this ever since i saw it

#guilty gear #i guess #cant remember what this was under but it's stuck with me forever #not genshin for once #not my tweets either #''goku got stronger when he took the weights off also''#🐁.txt

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crystallizsch · 26 days

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Im sorry I normally don't really send people screenshots of tweets but I thought this was so endearing I needed to show u😭

AAHHHFKJDS HI NO IT’S OKAY THIS TWEET IS SO REALLLLL

JAMIL MY BB

JAMIL MY BELOVED

LOOK AT THEM AAAAHHH

THERE IS NO JAMIL ONLY TSUM JAMIL ‼️‼️‼️‼️👆👆👆

AND SMOL CHIBI JAMIL

I LOB HIMMM

i am squeezing them

squeezing them affectionately ---

#I KNOW HE’S ONLY AN R CARD SO IM JUST TAKING WHAT I CAN GET #i’m sobbinf i just cant handle little jamil afdjbddjjsks #thank you the tweet is honestly really cute they speak the truth 🤧🤧💖💖#[—#✦ i have thoughts #✦ asks #—]

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lil-vibes · 1 year

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#i cant fuking breathe #been CACKLING at my own rendition of this tweet for 10minutes helpp #dazai says FUCK them mind games and starts swinging #sigma and nikolai on the sidelines like: 🧍🧍.damn. didnt know he did that..yikes #one (1) punch and fyodor falls like a badly built jenga tower #im actually crying over this PLEASE FHSJGJA #bsd #dazai osamu #bsd 105.5 #my predictions for 106 has DRASTICALLY changed

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ibetittering · 2 months

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The washing machine one has more than one meaning if yk what I mean, anyways just learned my great grandma had ties to the mafia

(Part 13)

#she also helped my uncle evade the police when she was alive #he got caught and put away for 10 years though 😔#cant explain all the great grandma lore but just know there's a LOT #lets just saying might not be related to half the people I'm told I am #red vs blue #rvb #rooster teeth #rvb grif #rvb donut #rvb simmons #rvb sarge #tweet #funny tweets

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gavidaily · 11 months

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#pablo gavi #gavi #gavigif #gaviedit #drink every time he says bueno or la verdad #the hand gesture asdfghj he's so #he's my number one boy #one of the first tweets i saw about him was how his face is 80% eyes and yes it is #also this place looks like a jail cell #hey who set up this? the camera and the light? i just wanna talk #i got my barça jersey <3 the home kit 22/23 oh she's beautiful <3 #long time no see huh #it'll change next week!!!!#cant wait i miss him sm <3 #also: this isn't what he says 100% but it's adapted

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0okamiyuki · 1 year

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I doodel da new guy

#Vantalism #Vantacrow Bringer #nijisanji en #nijisanji #nijisanjien #nijien #niji #NijiKrisis #new wave les gooo #hes caught my eye for now #his tweets are so gap moe i cant

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belovedgamers · 11 months

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YOU HEARD HER NEW YEAR SAME MESSAGE

#i cant BELIEVE he deleted last year’s tweet :(#it was so funny #mythical sausage #catrina speaks #nlsmp

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starscelly · 4 months

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really normal harls. thanks.

dal@mtl 02.10.24

#cant express to u how NORMAL and sweetly he was sitting there before and after doing this #reminds me of the thall 'trapped in a case of emotion' tweet #thank u. for this #shocked me so much i fr jumped #thomas harley #dallas stars #stars lb #cel gifs

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gibbearish · 1 month

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oh another thing i didn't want to mention at the time, during The Happening™ i went looking through pre-2023 google to see what the talk abt james was like beforehand, and i managed to find his fucking prehistoric old twitter account. didn't find anything earth shattering but we can certainly still point and laugh

"political mouthpiece" sure man

oh dw man you didnt need to tell us you've never done drugs, we could all tell

oh so at least at one point he did know how to get jobs other than youtube, fascinating

lmao

#also dont like the 88 but i cant find anything abt his age/bday rn so that could just be his birth year?#thatd make him abt 36 rn? idk im not good at telling ages from appearance so idk how close that is #origibberish #james somerton #also i hope it goes without saying but like. dont go bother him here #i havent censored the info bc frankly i dont see the point #it wasnt particularly hard to find just poking around so with exact words from tweets i figured its kinda moot #but im trusting yall to not make me regret that yhear me #edit: someone in the replies confirmed as far as they know he is around 36 so the 88 likely is just his birth year

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fiendishartist2 · 9 months

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i think i hauve Covid

[ID: A Magnus Archives comic of Jon and Martin at an office party. Jon is in a black halter top dress and is wearing green eyeshadow, and he sips from a glass of wine with a flat expression and thinks, "Maybe if I pretend to have a nervous breakdown Elias will let me leave." Martin is standing beside him, wearing a white button-down and pink pants, and he's flushing as he thinks, "I think I hauve Covid." End ID]

ID from @princess-of-purple-prose, thank you for the ID!!

#god i love that tweet #sorry for the handwriting as always i cant print neatly lol #my fav genre of jonmartin art is jon serving while martin looks like hes going to prom #im sure ive said that before but idc #this is like early s2 before jon completely loses it and after martin's already in love w him lol #my art #digital art #artists on tumblr #tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #martin blackwood #jonmartin #tw covid #i can take your @ out but i wanted to thank you :D

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cheriboms · 8 months

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doctober day 17: einstein

okay so theres a bit in the game where young emmett is testing einstein on his multiplication tables. there is ALSO a bit where marty tells einstein to sit/stay and he doesnt listen. thus i present my hypothesis, which is that doc 100% had his priorities straight during the puppy years

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