#I didn't know she had a family name
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Let’s discuss about Buddie (9-1-1). (This post will contain spoilers up to 6x18)
Did I like season 6? Yes. There were good moments in it after all.
Was I sad that Buddie wasn’t made canon? Yeah. Was I angry? Not really.
I mean, I can make sense of the Natalia plotline up to a point, it can be understandable that after the lightning, Buck sees life differently, and despite not being a Buck x Natalia enthusiast, I don’t hate it. Sure, I don’t adore it and I’d like to know more about Natalia, but at least it make sense ig.
It’s an open ending yet, things can evolves later, and the couch theory is still up, and if it makes Buck happy now well good for him.
On the other hand, the Marisol plotline... Well, I can’t say I’m a fan of it because I’m not. I mean, I can get why the writer did that, but tbh for me Eddie is a gay man (far away in denial but still), and well, tbf to me the Eddie x Marisol doesn’t make sense at all. Plz let this man be gay and happy, he deserves it.
Also, if I wanted angst, I’d open an Ao3 angst/ hurt/ no comfort fic.
But meh, I’m just a random someone on the internet, so whatever I guess.
#9-1-1#9-1-1 6x18#911 6x18#911 spoilers#buddie#eddie diaz#eddie diaz x evan buckley#evan buck buckely#natalia dollenmeyer#evan buckkley x natalia dollenmeyer#I didn't know she had a family name#like sure she has one ofc#but I didn't know what it was#anyway#911 marisol#this post is probably pointless#I mean I'm pretty sure no one will read it#plus I'm tired and should go to sleep rather than rambling on the internet over fictional characters#like dude it's 1am go to sleep
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visiting the hometown
(want everyone to know this edit came to me in a dream and i changed the lore just to do it)
#in the dream i was like editing it but i was also there? it was weird. it started as a dream about lawson in a zombie apocalypse#ok important tags first so i can write an essay#ts4#ts4 render#ts4 edit#the sims 4#beckett#lawson#blood sports#but yeah if you haven't been here before beckett and lawson never knew each other as kids#if they did it would be a butterfly effect and mess w a bunch of other plot details. so i decided to work around it#also if ur new they've had a friends with benefits thing going on for a long time but lawson is in love with him. beck doesn't know#originally beckett was put in foster care as a baby bc of neglect and was bounced around foster homes for years#he was a troubled child always getting in fights a kleptomaniac undiagnosed autism etc etc foster families tried and just didn't want him#then when he was around 12 a very nice old lady named cora got him and they ended up forming a great bond they loved each other#she was going to adopt him then when beckett was around 15 or 16 his birth mother reentered the picture and wanted him back#it started a really nasty legal battle and cora died. we can't say for sure it was the stress of this fight but beckett certainly thinks so#anyway he did go back with his birth mother and things got really bad for him. he dropped out of school started doing worse crimes and so o#but none of that is what even changed#now LAWSON is also from west virigina like beckett. it's a small town lawson was new he had no friends#he was a very clingy possessive child who cried and threw tantrums so much#he met beckett and the rest is history. beckett didn't really mind how lawson acted he didn't really find him annoying like everyone elsedi#besides he didn't have friends either#lawson has wealthy parents they were welcoming to beckett at first if a little apprehensive. then he stole something from their house#and lawson wasn't allowed to hang out with him anymore. but he still did in secret. they still have no idea that beckett's even still aroun#or just how involved lawson is with him and his. activities 😬 they just think he's their good little college boy#in the original beckett moved to Not Gotham City when his mother got him back but in this version lawson is going to college there#and beckett's been distant from him for a while things are awful for him and lawson says hey. what if you gave the city a try. and he did#so really you could say the events of blood sports are all lawson's fault the end
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should we tell her the truth...?
#bug fables#bug fables spoilers#bf art month#bf leif#bf muze#stuff i made tag#being named after your grandparents is obviously a normal thing in this family#since muze herself is also named after her grandma#but it's a bit weird for leif to be named after their grandparent who died exploring isn't it?#muze certainly wouldn't become an explorer if muse had died on an expedition#and based on their reaction leif didn't know about this - did she say too much?#leif is processing this new knowledge that muze knows who they are#but doesn't know *who they are*#it's a lot to take in
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me (starkid fan) 🤝 my sister (henry danger fan)
joey richter from MY SHOWS is in HER shows as well??
#the climate of attitudes towards joey richter in my household is very very funny#because my sister didn't know his name#so i went to see him and darren and lauren in the palladium and i didn't bother saying who they were because i know she doesn't know them#or i thought i knew anyway#and then at some point she was watching henry danger and i just had to point him out and go Hey i've seen him live#i pulled up the photos and everything it was a bit of a shock moment#well not for me i knew this since my starkid discovery because i thoroughly went through everyone's imdb pages#but she certainly didn't#my mum calls him 'that moustachey bloke' since she forgot his name after the concert#bless her she had to put up with me going absolutely insane with basically no prior knowledge of these people#she googled them all and went 'you know lauren lopez and that moustachey bloke are married?' as if that wasnt the first wedding in the worl#but yeah everyone in my family has a wildly different perspective on joey richter specifically and i find it absolutely hilarious#starkid#henry danger#in a shocking turn of events tumblr user gnomeantics has shared a large amount of useless anecdotes in the tags#gnomeantics original 🌟
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jenna coleman playing john&johanna in sandman just reminds me of peter griffins ancestors always being identical to him
#if this has been said before lmk#guys i know we aren't supposed to say this but i didn't like the adaptation of that issue#except rachel's actress I think that was perfect#and when they mentioned chas by name#but#no weird dream flesh walls#no train ride together#I know they had limitations cause of the property blah blah blah (jj abrams wbs and hbo i hate you)#but she was ridiculously clean and put together#and i hate the coat#RATHYYDYGJ#it's just a dozen small things that bothered me#maybe i'll sit down and make a comprehensive list at some point idfk#sandman netflix#john constantine#johanna constantine#jenna coleman#family guy#😭😭😭😭
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I've been thinking about the tragedy of Elizabeth Woodville living to see the death of her family name.
I don't mean her family with her husband, which lived on through her daughter and grandson. I mean her own.
Her sisters died, one by one, many of them after 1485. When Elizabeth died, only Katherine was left, and she would die before the turn of the century as well.
All her brothers died, too. Lewis died in childhood. John was executed. Anthony was murdered. Lionel died suddenly in the peak of Richard's reign, unable to see his niece become queen. Edward perished at war. Richard died in grieving peace. For all the violence and judgement the family endured, it was "an accident of biology" that ended their line: none of the brothers left heirs, and the Woodville name was extinguished. We know the family was aware of this. We know they mourned it, too:
“Buy a bell to be a tenor at Grafton to the bells now there, for a remembrance of the last of my blood.”
Elizabeth lived through the deposition and death of her young sons, and lived to see the end of her own family name. It must have been such a haunting loss, on both sides.
#(the quote is by Richard Woodville in his deathbed will; he was the last of the Woodville brothers to die)#elizabeth woodville#woodvilles#my post#to be clear I am not arguing that the death of an English gentry family name is some kind of giant tragedy (it absolutely the fuck is not)#I'm trying to put it into perspective with regards to what Elizabeth may have felt because we know her family DID feel this way#writing this kinda reminded me of how I am just not fond at all about the way Elizabeth's experiences in 1483-85 are written about#and the way lots so many of the unprecedentedly horrifying aspects are overlooked or treated so casually:#the seizure and murder of two MINOR sons and the illegal execution of another;#her sheer vulnerability in every way compared to all her queenly predecessors; how she was harassed by 'dire threats' for months;#how she had 5 very young daughters with her to look after at the time (Bridget and Katherine were literally 3 and 4 years old);#how unprecedented Richard's treatment of her was: EW was the first queen of england to be officially declared an adulteress;#and the first and ONLY queen to be officially accused of witchcraft#(Joan of Navarre was accused of her treason; she was never explicitly accused of witchcraft on an official level like EW was)#the first crowned queen of england to have her marriage annulled; and the first queen to have her children officially bastardized#what former queens endured through rumors* were turned into horrifying realities for her.#(I'm not trying to downplay the nightmare of that but this was fundamentally on a different level altogether)#nor did Elizabeth get a trial or appeal to the church. like I cannot emphasize this enough: this was not normal for queens#and not normal for depositions. ultimately what Richard did *was* unprecedented#and of course let's not forget that Elizabeth had literally just been unexpectedly widowed like 20 days before everything happened#I really don't feel like any of this is emphasized as much as it should be?#apart from the horrifying death of her sons - but most modern books never call it murder they just write that they 'disappeared'#and emphasize that ACTUALLY we don't know what happened to them (this includes Arlene Okerlund)#rather than allowing her to have that grief (at the very least)#more time is spent dealing with accusations that she was a heartless bitch or inconsistent intriguer for making a deal with Richard instead#it also feels like a waste because there's a lot that can be analyzed about queenship and R3's usurpation if this is ever explored properly#anyway - it's kinda sad that even after Henry won and her daughter became queen EW didn't really get a break#her family kept dying one by one and the Woodville name was extinguished. and she lived to see it#it's kinda heartbreaking - it was such a dramatic rise and such a slow haunting fall#makes for a great story tho
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what i think is written on the marauders graves:
regulus: Regulus Arcturus Black, 1961-1979
marlene: Marlene Meadowes, "may you sleep on your tender girlfriend's breasts" 1960-1981
dorcas: Dorcas Meadowes, a good soldier 1960-1981
james: James F. Potter, loving father and husband 1960-1981
lily: Lily J. Potter, loving mother and wife 1960-1981
sirius: Sirius B. "Time is but a paper moon, Teo Torriatte", 1959-1996
peter: Peter Pettigrew, 1959-1998
remus: Remus J. Lupin, friend and mentor to many, "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars", 1960-1998
#regulus' doesn't have anything other than his name and date as his family (uncle/aunt/cousins) were in charge of his burial#marlene's is.. amazing. with a sappho quote. as she had spoke to dorcas and her friends about what she'd want written on it#and dorcas was the one in charge of it (marlene also said about wanting to change her last name to Meadowes)#the order did dorcas' so... i was inspired from batman having those words as a memorial for jason#who is his son. so just saying 'great soldier' is. very hurtful. jason was very pissed about it. and i thought it'd fit dorcas#james and lily's are matching. Dumbledore (like dorcas) did their graves. so they just have that. what their most known for#remus did sirius' one... sirius had also talked a little about their gravestone. wanting his last name not on it and quote something queen#peter's was done by hari. he didn't know what to put so he just did that#hari also did remus' and a little by McGonagall who told him that was remus' favourite quote during school#marauders era#marauders#marlene mckinnon#dorcas meadowes#sirius black#james potter#remus lupin#regulus black#lily evans#peter pettigrew
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hella idk what to send to you for aftg im either bored or annoyed and I don't wanna just say bad things about it 😭 like that's just rude and yall obviously like it I DONT WANNA BE SOME DEBBY DOWNER MDMWKEM
I looked at the anti aftg tag too to see if I could intermingle there and last I checked it was a mix of fans obsessed with the series and haters being just a tad harsh imo, so i couldn't even do that RIP. I'm so lonesome in what is maybe a whole group of people gaslighting me 😔👊
honestly ive said this before and i always have to tread a very fine line with it because this isn't me saying it's OKAY or like. promotable. but i do think to an extent that aftg's problematicness is actually an aspect of what draws people in a lot. like the characters and their reactions to things feel real for who they are, what they've been through and the environments they were raised in if that makes sense? and then you go in the anti-aftg tag and it's just again and again 'they said THIS thing and acted THIS way in response to THIS scenario and it was PROBLEMATIC' and like. yeah. outside of the internet bubble you're in people do actually do that. like that behaviour exists. it IS problematic, well done. you pointed at a wall and called it a wall. but like? in real life people - PARTICULARLY deprived, traumatised people that typically don't ever get therapy or community or someone telling them why something is bad - DO act this way. ive said half of my love for andrew is literally just because he took an awful backstory and let it make him a complete cunt and ive NEVER seen a character do it as shamelessly as him before. and yeah there's the argument for how it's never resolved in the book where nora ties it with a bow and points at the bad behaviour so the readers can go 'see, this is wrong' and we all clap, but idk it just for me feels that when people point at the aftg characters and go problematic! problematic! problematic! it's like they're missing the point a bit.
the point being? that we need to be putting WAY more heat on the author. i really dislike her and a lot of her writing choices and her insistance of using slurs that aren't hers to reclaim and just because it happened to make the characters feel just that bit more authentic i can still acknowledge that she CLEARLY wrote it without characterisation in mind and just added all that problematic shit anyway. like i never get why there's so little focus on nora's writing decisions and thousands of posts just fucking CRUCIFYING the characters themselves and 'let's explain in detail why this behaviour is Morally Reprehensible and they should be Locked Up Forever'. like if u want to focus on the characters so bad and pretend they're the sole reason why aftg is Problematic and Bad then why is it so hard to acknowledge that someone raised the way they were might have some misinformed, ignorant beliefs. idk lol
#but i do also think im prone to viewing these characters as TOO real and i understand there's a line to be drawn between media and reality#like at what point does 'life imitates art' become just a genuinely shit piece of media#and at the end of the day im fully aware which end of the spectrum aftg is on LMAO but this is my 2 cents#like ive met so many people that have said absolutely heinous things that the internet would eat them alive for#like homophobic sexist shit you name it they've said it and it IS problematic and uncomfortable to listen to#but i also know that while teenagers online that would call them problematic were busy claiming some new fucking buzz word to throw around#those people were actively just fucking trying to survive. like they weren't learning about why misogyny is bad#because they were fucking addicted to drugs or living through poverty or some shit like they had BIGGER PROBLEMS#like not everyone got the education or life experiences you got and while it's valid to assume someone saying horrible things#is horrible themselves there's also the times it's just genuinely a misinformed ignorant person#like they'll say 'problematic' things and i'll point out why it's bad and they'll literally go 'oh i never thought of that.' that's it!!!#like i have this childhood friend whose life has been an absolute circus start to finish like COMPLETE instability i wont even get into it#low and behold she had NO ONE educating her about things and one time i had to explain to her why having abortion rights was important#bc she just out of nowhere said she was against abortions. and i initially was outraged and disappointed that this came from her#but i didn't patronise her or shout i just explained my angle on why i think they're good and she was on side immediately#cause she always had bigger problems than researching ethics and no one to guide her so she just absorbed the first opinion she came across#and in a small town from a working class family that opinion is typically not the nice woke answer the internet demands#and with aftg particularly andrew bc he's the one who gets a lot of slack for being violent and generally unreasonable#you have someone who has literally not had someone treat him kindly a single time in his life and each new person is a genuine safety threa#like the average person just does not have to deal with that! ofc they have more time to decide their political and moral compass!#and that's so relevant to real life! popularity for the monarchy is highest amongst the working class! the people voted for brexit! trump!#the lower classes and marginalised simply do not have the resources that higher classes do#and someone fighting for survival is not going to be reading twitter threads on cancel culture in their spare time#so many issues in the world can be eased so much quicker by kindness and patient non-patronising education#than just. pointing and calling 'problematic' at anything remotely uncomfortable#idk where this came from its 2am i should go to bed and instead im ranting not even about aftg anmore this is completely it's own thing now#i feel like i worded this badly too im gonna wake up to anons in the morning accusing me of like. condoning spiking#also gloomy i am SO sorry you are the true victim of this i went ENTIRELY off piste on this one please ignore this 😭#ask
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The sentence “Mark Johnson and T’Pel are here again, sir” becomes every Starfleet admiral’s worst nightmare.
#he and kathryn aren't officially married but Mark calls her his wife playfully anyway#I am firmly on team 'Mark Johnson is a good person and he and Janeway love each other very much' bc it makes the tragedy 10fold#I think after they receive word about Voyager not being destroyed or otherwise lost forever Mark suffers from an extremely guilty conscience#if he'd just been able to believe a little more...hold out a little longer...#Mark: You know near the end I thought you were a little crazy. Still holding out hope. I didn't know how you did it - I still don't.#When they tell you to 'stay strong' they don't tell you how much it hurts. (sad chuckle) but I guess I'm a bit of a coward. I gave her up#for dead. I should have known better. Of course she wouldn't go out that easy.#T'Pel tells him that just because he moved on doesn't mean he's a coward - in fact it takes a certain kind of bravery to do that as well.#Most of the people around her certainly urged her to do the same. She just...couldn't. As long as there was a chance - she couldn't.#She supposes that's also a form of cowardice.#Mark laughs. 'It all depends on how you look at it huh? mm...look at us. Two old fools~' (silence between them as they look up at the sky)#T'Pel and Greskrendtregk are among the very few who didn't give up their lovers for dead#and I don't think he's a grumpy person at all - if anything I'd characterize him as more energetic and a bit frustrated by how#serene Mark and T'Pel are hehe#also in my head Elieth and Varith believe that Tuvok could be alive while Asil and Sek think he's dead and are frustrated by the others#Elieth believes more fervently than Varith does (Varith is more in the middle saying neither possibility has been proven)#it causes a bit of family drama#also by 'started a family' Mark means getting married while T'Pel thinks he means had a baby#God...his name really is 'Mark Johnson' huh. Bathroom sign of a name. The most avergae man in the world. Love ya guy.#Mark - T'Pel - Greskrendtregk <- star trek name spectrum#doodle page#bea art tag#st voyager mark#st voyager mark johnson#t'pel#t'pel art#greskrendtregk
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Me: I don't like Sci-fi, space operas, or fantasy.
Me: *sees fanart of some characters* Oh these look cool. I wonder why their arm looks like that. Why is that one person dressed in skull attire? I keep seeing these guys everywhere, let's get the book on Audible what could possibly go wrong?
Book: *Sci-fi fantasy novel in space*
Me:
#the fanart didn't give the impression of any of these TT0TT#maybe like modern fantasy...which I guess this is more 'future fantasy' but ahhh#silly talks#dazed lost confused#naked in the woods i am#where am i what's going on????#i think the 'houses' are based off our solar system#there's so many fucking names too many fucking names TT0TT I'm listening in a car while driving I CANT KEEP LOOKING UP FUCKING NAMES#I may have printed out the list of names that literally listed at the beginning beCAUSE I CANT REMEMBER ALL THE FUCKING NAMES TT0TT#I had to re-listen to the first 4 chapters twice because I was confused *sobs*#who are you people#MC funny tho she says curse words....I can understand curse words and the character work so that's good#turns out it might be a murder mystery? Annnnnd we've looped back around to a genre I'm cool with#literally had no idea what the plot was but "uhh competition between families/clans? Maybe?' TT0TT#i'm liking it? now that I kinda know what's going on#apparently the other books might have more mystery? I'm down for that I guess#i really need to look at what I'm about to get sometimes TT0TT But monkey brain was like 'oooo i like the art/chars looks lets do it!' TT0T#fun fact dipshit me bought another fantasy (I think it's high fantasy) too so fuck me I guess#look at me expanding my horizons!#anyway I thought this would be a funny 'point and laugh at silly' considering my stance on these things#let's see if anyone can figure out what i'm talking about based on what little i've given you to work off of laksdjflkajf;a#mistakes were made....but at least this looks like a happy mistake#and i might make a custom nendo of one of those jackasses klfjdalksjfas#i was NOT vibing with the prose the first time through. TT0TT but I think i got a handle on it now mannnn#this is so outside my wheelhouse orz#i was expecting MAYBE some fantastical elements but not high fantasy (i don't think it is??? maybe more modern??? post apocalyptic future?-#-ahhh another genre i care not for klfajdslkjf) but the space thing THREW ME FOR A FUCKING LOOP! that was a blindside! TT0TT)#i heard the 2nd book is a bit of a mind fuck......now THAT'S something I'm invested in 030
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Oh God, I can't stop thinking that you're planning to create some weird parallel between Hershey and mayor, because she's going to lose her owner and the mayor lost LBD, or something like that.
Or I wonder if Macaque being a "half owner" of a cat and the mayor owning a dog is a way to show how different they are?
Am... Am I too predictable for my own good?
Or am I just gonna do something even worse?
All I can say is that Mayor is- quite frankly, a dog person. They are in fact, a dog. If they were an animal then they would be a dog. And for self indulgent reasons, I would always think of them to be a giant white fluffy one.
I actually also think that it's safe now to admit that the only reason I created Hershey was for the sole purpose for the Mayor to have a dog. At least, that was the original intention. And I knew that Mayor would not actually ever go out of their way to get a dog, and so very certain circumstances had to be created in order for it to work. And so Yīzé, the friendly neighbor next door, was created. But the old man and little dog have grown on me so much that their purposes have far surpassed their original intentions.
Also: Macaque's ownership of Māo is unfortunately next to nothing XDDD. That cat is completely Baihe's responsibility and honestly this guy does not give a single crap about the feline. He's not so much of a cat person, but I can tell you that he's not a dog person either. He's... A monkey.
#ask#blue and violet#I still need to make that referance drawing thing for Yīzé and Hershey#actually you know what here's a little fum fact:#Hershey is named after an old family pet that my aunt and uncle used to have#I was too young to remember much but she was a small white dog like Hershey in Blue and Violet#wayyy smaller tho#she was either a Havanese or a Bichon Frisé#and 'she' might bave actually been a 'he'#but I can't remember at this point. my uncle and auntie gave them sway sometime after they had their first kid#which was really sad#and also lately I heard that apparently Hershey actually passed away a while ago :'((((#so I suppose you could say Hershey in Blue and Violet is just my tribute to her or something#I didn't really know her to be fair#anyways Macaque would punt Māo through a wall of given the chance and reason#I swear Macaque and Māo would have the worst beef with each other if I was bothered enough to write it
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i love it when i find out that a french-speaking artist i'm a fan of is belgian
#my great-grandmother was belgian#it'd be a lie to say i'm in touch with that ancestry but other than irish that's really all i am#i have three irish catholic grandparents and then on my mom's side one random finnish-belgian grandmother#whose last name was english because her father just took the name of the guy in front of him at ellis island#bc whatever finnish name he had. the guy doing the paperwork didn't wanna spell it and he wasn't literate.#like most white americans i don't know my own family history very well#but i make a good irish-american stereotype bc im a redheaded lapsed catholic from a giant family based in massachusetts#can't get much more irish-american than that#tales from diana#my great-grandmother didn't even speak french tho. she was flemish#she was also illiterate and according to my mother not the brightest bulb in the lamp in the common sense department#basically everyone on both sides of my mom's family had a very rough background#is what it is
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it's something small but it's making me feel some type of way. earlier today i went to a place and got correctly named for one of the first times by a stranger. this is one of the first times i've been able to introduce myself, myself to someone by name in person. she asked for my name and when i told her it was 'ellie,' she wrote it down on one of the things i bought. and she probably didn't even realize in that moment that she made my transgender heart burst with hope and pride, but it meant everything to me.
it was a different location of the same place i originally came up with my name (albeit a variation on it) over 10 years ago.
#myevilposts#i know she didn't bat an eyelash bc my actual name passes off as nickname/'matches' the gender i present as#but it was a major moment for me. that is one of the first times someone has called me by my real name without having to be told it's#my 'new' name. to her it was just my name.#and another person at the place had she/they pronouns on her name tag and i rlly rlly wanted to like. compliment it.#say 'i like your name tag.' but i didn't want to accidentally seem sarcastic or make it awkward.#but that made me feel rlly. safe? home? to just be around family. and/or allies. p much everyone there had pronouns on their name tags.#and i know in practice that can be an uncomfortable gutting dangerous thing to do. you shouldn't have to share private stuff. but it did#make me feel a bit safer knowing i was a little less alone.
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my mommy made me mad so i read that bitch to filth took a xanax without debating myself about really needing it and now i'm waiting for that shit to knock me the hell out while drinking a coke and eating dark chocolate bc it makes me happy and it helps with my pms. oooo adulting. funny, cause my mom would lose it and say i'm letting the mental illness win or some weird ableist shit like that, if she knew this is what i'm not calling her back for. oh and i am also binging bluey until the manufactured sleep wins. if anyone cares.
#can't even spell my name right when she demands that my family tell me to call her? at 10pm? ma'am business hours are over#but even if they weren't you are not a priority client rn if you would like to be you can upgrade your status in one easy payment#i told her she was being pushy and i would call her back when i had time and when i wanted to then i did that therapy thing#and softened the blow by telling her i'm glad she's not dead after she told me she might die without much else and ignored me for weeks#UNTIL i didn't txt my abusive dad on father's day bc i was working but also i don't interact with my abusers unless it's for my own safety#and she went ballistic and tried bullying me into giving both of them attention and alternated between ignoring me and scolding me#and for that to work now i have to care and as my mom luvs to remind me no tengo verguenza but im glad... shame holds me the fuck back#objectively this is one of the funniest things i've ever done to her cause uh my mom is no walk in the park#and that txt i sent was so fucking detached my husband n i r DYING unlike she is AYE anyway i don't even wish her ill or do this to hurt he#i just know that me not being reactive triggers her and her method of coping is to take her emotions out on me unless i validate tf outa he#toxic toxic toxic woman#dumb ass shit ☾☁️ ࣪ ִִִִִִִִֶֶֶֶֶֶֶֶָָָָָָָ⭒𓂃🐇
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my mother called me max today and despite that being my name (my friend had put that as my name on the package) it made me a bit sick to hear
#dib noise#i don't like it when she says it#also a fun fact: she didn't want me to use the name before because she had a.. relative? cousin?#named max who commited suicide#umm i use it anyway ok..? i literally don't know your family#she isn't particularly transphobic but is funny about me and my name#plus its not even just Max its MAXWELL... i just tell people it's max cuz theyre gonna#shorten it to that either way
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Maybe it's for the better that I don't remember what I had at home
#I remember I had hundreds of books which I wanted to reread someday#I don't really remember what they were about#some illustrations#Lots of clothes#Several big anatomy atlases which costed damn too much#My guitar#My two guitars#It's just when Im having a breakdown while lying i remember how i was lying in a corridor and crying the same way because#russians were constantly bombing the building 'with neonazis' near us#not counting my mom i was the only person who cried from time to time im a bit embarrassed of this fact#My siblings and my dad didn't cry at all#So many people have being dying FOR WHAT for some russian ego??#I remember how i read that a student from my uni was shot to death his name was Shmagliy Danylo#everything loses it's value when genocide comes to your home#I remember how a girl I can't stand sent a video with helicopters and fuck#Just because we are work enemies doesn't mean she deserved it#My another classmate lives in Brovary it's near Kyiv and I was so scared because she didn't respond and it was when Bucha happened#She's ok and her family as well#It is the time when people you barely know or even dislike write that rocket hit their house or someone died again and#It's the time your 'dislike' doesn't matter anymore#Nothing has so low price and nothing can be more valuable at the same time than life
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