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opie-nixx · 2 years

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Where's Y/n? (CHAP. 11)

Arthur: "Imma head into town, want to come with?" His gruff voice asks lowly sitting up from cuddling.

Y/n: "No, I'm okay. Shoulder's a bit stiff still. I think I might just sit and relax a bit." I sit up a bit and give a small stretch as Arthur nods his head understandingly.

Arthur: "Okay. Take it easy. I'll be back in an hour." He puts his hat on and gives me a peck on the cheek, before standing up and making his exit.

Y/n: "Please be careful." I say sweetly leaning into his kiss.

Arthur: "Of course." I stand up myself and make my way out of his tent. I pull out a cigarette, lighting it and taking a small puff. My eyes dart around to the other member's as they all are off in there own worlds. I hear Abigail yelling at John for him not being a man. I scoff to myself and keep looking until my eye's land on Jack who seemed to be a bit to far from camp...and talking to a tree? I take another puff before flicking it to the ground and make my way towards him.

Y/n: "Jack?" I say with a worried look.

Jack: "Y/n!" I take a few cautious steps as my stomach begins to churn.

Y/n: "You okay?" I place my hand on his shoulder and squat down to his level taking a look around us.

Jack: "Yeah. I'm fine. I was talking to my friend."

Y/n: "Your friend?" I wrap an arm around his waist and pick him up. That's when I feel my hair get yanked hard pulling my head back as I feel a barrel get pushed to my back. I wince and keep a tight grip on Jack. I feel his little hands grip my shirt.

??: "That'll be us..Think about screaming I kill the kid and make you watch." A man says tightening his grip.

Y/n: "Let go of my hair." I say menacingly.

??: "Look who's being all tough." I hear him and a group of men laugh.

??: "You'll be coming with us."

Y/n: "Why the boy?"

??: "Collateral." That's when he releases my hair and jams his gun into me to go forward with his gun.

Jack: "Where are we going?"

Y/n: "We're gonna go on a little ride with these men." He gives me a nod as I flash him a reassuring smile rubbing his back. We reach the outskirts of camp to the main road and they lead us to some horses. They allow me to get on a black and white mustang. I put Jack down and climb into the saddle before holding out my arm for him to grab. He wastes no time in taking it and I hoist him up setting him in front of me. He holds onto the saddle horn.

??: "If you think about riding off. we will shoot you." He says pointing a gun at me. I roll my eyes.

Y/n: "I'd only hope you'd know how to kidnap someone." I say sarcastically as I give my horse a slight nudge with my foot. Taking off in a trot following 1 of the men who took off. Taking a glance at the men. I recognize some of there clothes.

'Braithwaite's?' It all begins to come back to me. I tighten my grip on the reins as I keep 1 arm wrapped around Jack.

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Trotting back into camp, Arthur's see some of the members huddled around Dutch as he offers reassuring words. He hitches his horse with a small content grin before making his way to his tent.

Dutch: "I know you worry. Arthur, have you seen Jack or Y/n?"

Arthur: "No, Y/n should be resting in my tent." He states as the small grin almost completely falls off his face as he makes his way over to his tent in a faster pace.

Arthur: "Y/n?" He asks in a small worried tone. Once he sees that your not there he marches over to your tent only to find the same thing. His heart drops to his stomach as he turns on his heel and makes his way back to Dutch.

Arthur: "She ain't here, Dutch." He scans the whole camp site looking for any trace of you.

Abigail: "Where's my goddamn son? Where is he? Where's my son? They took him didn't they? They took my son!" She walks over with apparent worry and dread.

Arthur: "Who?"

Hosea: "We think the Braithwaite woman took them. That Kieran saw a couple of fellers... sound like Braithwaite boys."

Arthur lets out an annoyed scoff before wiping the sweat off of his forehead.

Abigail: "Where's my son? If anything... where is my son, Dutch van der Linde?"

Dutch: "We will find him, we will bring him back to you... and we will kill any fool that had the temerity... to touch one hair on that boy's head. Abigail, you have my word. And we will find Y/n." Dutch says looking between both Abigail and Arthur.

Abigail: "Just get me back my son." She lets out an exasperated sigh trying to steady her breathing. Dutch begins to make his way to the horses as do John, Hosea and Sean.

Bill: "Dutch, we just heard about Jack. You need some extra guns?"

Dutch: "Yeah, why not? Micah, Kieran, anyone strange turns up... you kill 'em! Rest of you, let's ride."

As they make there way to there horses, Arthur is just thinking about how much of a fool he was for leaving you alone. Thoughts about you being hurt filled his mind, hoping your alright his grip on his reins tighten.

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It took about 20 minutes for us to get to the manor. 1 of the men slide off the horse and makes his way over to us. He hitches the horse we were on before demanding us to get down. I swing my leg over and slide out of the saddle with jack still in my arms.

??: "Give him to me." He demands.

Y/n: "Fuck. You." I push Jack behind me. He back hands me across the face. A harsh sting form on my cheek. I turn to Jack and squat to his level again.

Y/n: "I need you to cover your eye's and no matter what you hear you keep them closed." I flash him a smile. He nods and covers his eyes. I sin on my heel standing up unsheathing my knife in the process I drive my knife straight into the man's throat. Blood spewing as soon as I rip it out. Splattering and staining my shirt. I quickly pull it out and go for the next guy. He was to slow to reach for his gun so I quickly leapt to him wasting no time I bury the knife deep in his stomach.

??: "Hey!" My head snaps to the noise and I'm met with the butt of a gun straight to my face. Knocking me unconscious I fall limp. My mind is hazy but I hear voices. I can't make them out and I try to get up but I ripped off the ground and I feel myself be carried away as I hear a horse trot away.

Y/n: "J-Jack?.." Then I feel myself get placed in a in a chair as I feel rope being tied around my wrists and ankles. Tightly too if I may add. I feel the coarse texture dig into my skin. I try to wriggle free but they just slap me. This time I feel something open on my lip. I hear heels tap against the hardwood floor. My eyes follow the source.

Y/n: "Well, if it isn't the hag of the east." I chuckle.

Catherine: "Clever, girl. But not that clever considering your with us."

Y/n: "They'll come for me...And they will kill every last 1 of you." I taunt. That's when I get slapped again. This time my teeth dig into my cheek as my hair falls over my face. Blood pooling inside my mouth. I lick my lips and collect all the blood in my mouth before spitting it at her feet. I look towards 1 of her son's.

Y/n: "My mother hits harder than you." I give a menacing smile.

??: "You bitch." Catherine hold her hand up as she takes a step towards me.

Catherine: "We expect them to come, but will that dumb idiot be in time to save you or the boy." I cock my head to the side as she leans closer to my face.

Y/n: "You are so dumb it's astounding how you think your boys will be alive after this." I lean towards her.

Catherine: "You little-" I slam my head into her nose a loud crack emitting from it. I groan in pain as I feel a massive migraine form. I hear her yipe and gripe as she holds her nose. Trying to contain all the blood leaking out. I feel another hit graze across my face. I roll my head, cracking my neck. I spit on the ground again. She rushes out of the room as I hear a group of horses ride towards the manor. My heart begins to race until I notice she left me with a guard keeping his gun pointed at me. I glance at the barrel and then him.

??: "Don't think about it." I hear Dutch begin speaking.

Dutch: "We've come for the boy and woman."

Braithwaite: "Shouldn't have messed with our business now, should you?"

Dutch: "Whatever complaint you have with us, alleged... or otherwise... That is a young boy and an innocent woman. That is not the way you do things. Hand them both over." The man scoffs.

Braithwaite: "She ain't innocent, she killed 2 of our men and assaulted our mother." I hear the group chuckle, causing me to giggle as well.

Catherine: "Get the hell off our land."

Dutch: "well, if you ain't gonna be civilized about this.." That's when I hear shots being fired.

Arthur: "Y/n! You here?!" The guard holding a gun to my head quickly points his gun towards the door. I begin to wiggle my wrists as quietly as I can.

John: "Jack!?"

I feel the knot loosen on my hand as I hear the door downstairs slam open and the gunshots get louder. The familiar smell of synged flesh from hot bullets and gun smoke fill my nose as my heart beats with anticipation to see the gang. My right hands wiggles free but I keep it in place to not arouse suspicion, I see the fear in the guards face as sweat begins to drip from his chin. I feel the other knot loosen on my left.

Arthur: "Y/n! Where are you?!"

Y/n: "Upstairs!" I scream back to him, it obviously didn't go unnoticed since the guard took his hand and smacked me across the face. My head lolls to the side in aggravation from being beat on. My h/c h/l falling in my face. I give a deep sigh blowing my hair out of my face. I yank my hand out of the knot as my e/c orbs give the man a threatening stare. Before he even realized that both my hands were free the door to the room swings open with a loud bang. I see Arthur with a menacing glare pointing a sawed off towards the man. I glance back at the guard as he stares back at Arthur.

I kick the man towards Arthur as he squeezes the trigger to the sawed off, exposing his innards. I cover my face from the blast and slowly peak out once I see Arthur wasting no time walking towards me. The continuing gunshots seeming to fade for just a moment as he goes to press a kiss to my lips. I wince from the contact. He immediately pulls away and begins inspecting my face.

Arthur: "I'm so sorry, Y/n." He gives me a tight hug.

Y/n: "None of this is your fault." I return his hug and begin to stand up. I take the gun the man was holding me with and begin to make my way to the balcony.

Y/n: "There's gonna be more out front trying to regain! We need to hold them off!" I shout, Arthur and Dutch right behind me. We take cover behind pillars and begin firing away, taking out 1 Braithwaite at a time.

It doesn't take long before there numbers start to dwindle and they begin to run. Dutch and Hosea go back inside and try to break down the last door to the room they haven't searched. That is until the people inside the room begin to shoot. They both take cover on opposite sides of the door.Arthur pull's me out of gun fire back to the balcony. I begin to pant from all of the excitement. I grab Arthur''s jacket and pull him behind me to the other door on the opposite side. We see John trying to push it down.

Y//n: "Break it down." I say to Arthur. He wastes no time in forcing that door open in sync with John. Once they push the door open Arthur is the first 1 to gun the men both down. Just in time Hosea pushes the door open from the other side. Dutch makes his way over to the the closet and kicks it down. There stands the Braithwaite woman cowering in fear. He grabs her arm and slams her against the wall.

Dutch: "You want me to kill you too, old woman?" He says as he flashes his gun to her.

Braithwaite: "You bastards."

Hosea: "Wheres the boy?"

Catherine: "We have lived in this house for a hundred and twenty years. We never had no problems 'cept for Yankees."

Y/n: "Fuck this." I waste no time in stomping forward, balling my fist and throwing it across her cheek. Dutch let's go of her and Hosea backs away as she drops to the ground.

Y/n: "You miserable old hag." I kick her in her stomach.

Y/n: "He's a boy!" I kick her again before I grab her buy her hair back up to her feet.

Y/n: "They won't hit you but I sure as hell will. Now, tell them where you put Jack and you won't burn alive." I say with a menacing glare. I hear her gulp.

Catherine: "You killed my sons, you whore!"

Y/n: "You wouldn't know the half of it." I strike her again with the back of my hand and she drops to the ground.

Y/n: "Grab her." I tell Dutch as he picks her up with his arm around her. I grab a torch from the closet and stick it in the fire place to ignite. I look to the rest of the gang.

Y/n: "Anything like Moonshine or flammable, douse the entire house and meet back out front." They nod and begin to disperse. Dutch gives me a smirk.

Dutch: "What do we do with her?" He asks.

Y/n: "Outside." I begin to make my way down the stairs. Dutch and Arthur both following behind me. Dutch puts another bullet in her son's corpse. She screams and begins to cry as she gets dragged down the stairs. I set each room on fire as we ass it on the way out. The smell of strong alcohol and smoke begin to fill my nostrils. Dutch drags her to the front.

Hosea: "Where's the boy?" He demands. She spits at his feet and I kick her in the face in response.

Y/n: "I know where Jack is. A man in Saint Denis named Angelo Bronte." Dutch nods.

Catherine: "How did you know that?!" She goes to swipe for my legs and I just take a few steps back as she flops to the ground and cries. Dutch, Hosea, Arthur and I along with the rest of the gang go back to our horses. Before mounting up Dutch grabs my chin and brings it close to his as his eyes inspect me. My face burns a deep crimson as my eyes begin to dart around.

Dutch: "Hmm, Arthur will take you to get cleaned up."

Y/n: "I would expect no less."

Dutch: "He was worried as were we all, but I'm glad your safe."

Y/n: "Thank you, Dutch." I feel big hands be placed on my hips as Dutch mounts up.

Dutch: "Be careful coming back to camp."

Arthur: "We will." He says gruffly. The gang gives me a nod and smiles and say how they're glad I'm alive. I bid them off with a nod. A loud crash snaps me out of there greets as we hear a wailing. As they ride off I turn to Arthur who appeared to have a look of weary and dread taking over his face.

Arthur: "I shouldn't of left you."

Y/n: "Don't start with that. No-one could've thought something like-" Suddenly I'm cut off by Arthur slamming me against the tree. My breath hitches as my heart beat picks up.

Arthur: "I was so worried about you." He breathes.

Y/n: "I'm okay." I give a smile, his eyes scan over my face as his hands slowly move to brush my hair out of my face.

Arthur: "You're hurt." I roll my eyes.

Y/n: "This line of work does have hazards-" He pushes his lips against mine as his hands grip my thighs, I give a small jump and wrap them around his waist as our tongues fight for dominance. I wrap my hands around his his neck to deepen the kiss before giving up and letting him explore my mouth, making every bit of it his. I move my hands and place his hat on my head. He pulls away and sets me down. Arthur keeps me pressed against the tree and plants kisses along my neck. I feel the flame of the house intensify from the heat covering us from the night air. He begins to undo my shirt as I do his. He makes quick haste of his belt buckle and pants as I stand in shock from his member which just springs forward. I slowly undo my belt and my pants and step out of them He quickly puts me back in our original position with my legs around his waist and his hands on my hips. He gives me a few pecks on my lips before positioning himself before my entrance. My slick dripping down his length. He rests as head against mine.

Arthur: "Y/n..." I begin to mewl.

Y/n: "Please..Put it in." He slowly begins to push himself in. I throw my head back against the tree and moan. I hear him grit his teeth and grunt. He begins to thrust at a steady pace.

Y/n: "Be anything but gentle." I moan out. He gives me a questioning look.

Arthur: "You sure?" He drawls out, I shake my head yes and he begins to bounce me as hard and fast as he can without dropping me. I would like to say that I was impressed and began to wonder how he even managed, but my thoughts began to become blurry as hat began to tilt to where the brim was covering my eyes. Arthur kept his eye's on me the entire time.

Arthur: "You look so sexy with my hat on, girl." My breathing got heavier and heavier everytime he would drop me down his length. Juices began to squirt out as that familiar knot began to form and slowly untie.

Y/n: "Arthur, I'm cumming." I moan out as my eyes begin to roll to the back of my head. He grunted as he switched up and held me in 1 spot and began to thrust into me at an inhumane pace. Before I could even get a squeal out he had his hand over my mouth. My hands gripped his shoulders as my nails dig in.

Arthur: "I can't have everyone hearin that voice." He chuckles as my pussy begins to pulse. He pulls out as detach from him and drop on my knees. I grab his member and place it in my mouth and swirl my tongue around as his cum fills my mouth. He stands there in shock as he watches me with his hands pulling at his own hair.

Arthur: "Where did you learn this, girl?" He moans out. I give a slight giggle which causes him to twitch. Once I feel he has stopped cumming I pull my mouth off of him with a pop and begin to put my clothes back on. The sound of horses come quick as Arthur pulls me behind the tree again. The sound of shouting men and Catherine wailing fill our ears.

'I honestly must've drowned her out.'

Arthur takes his hands and cups my face as he presses a long deep kiss to my lips.

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stray-kids-react · 3 years

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Same birthday as them

Masterlist

...

Bang Chan

° Is the type to reschedule his own birthday so it could just be your day, but you will refuse his kind suggestions because you'd feel awful if you made it look like his birthday was just brushed aside like it's nothing.

° Let's you blow out the candles on the cake, smiling at you like a lovesick puppy which always makes Minho do obnoxious gagging noises as the other members join him and laugh. But Chan gets revenge on them, with frosting attacks.

° Gives the price with the candle in it, and will scoop up dollops of icing onto your piece of cake if you like frosting. And if you aren't a fan of frosting then he will steal the large amounts on your piece and put on his own piece.

° Always.. And I mean ALWAYS. Writes you birthday cards that make you cry, because he uses such kind words and makes you feel very special. Hyunjin will awkwardly pat your head as Felix clings to you like a koala.

"What words do you out in the letters to make her/him cry?" Hyunjin asked.

"Just the truth from my heart."

"Hyung she's/he's crying even harder now." Felix whispered, grabbing napkins.

Lee Know

° It always ends up going the complete opposite way you guys planned on spending your shared birthday. You both planned on going to a hotel to spend a few days away from everyone and everything, and now you were Camping with skz.

° Let's you open your presents first, secretly eager for you to open the one he bought you. And will laugh in the member's faces, bragging about how he always buys the best gifts for you. He says it's because you share one brain.

° Tries to play the birthday boy card with you, saying 'baby since it's my birthday can you get a drink?' and you always remind him that it's your birthday too so you shouldn't have to do favors on your birthday unless you want to.

° Will poke frosting onto your lips before kissing it away, making all of the members react in disgust and cringe. Even though you both know they are happy you two are together, but they are still like family and will tease both of you.

"Get a room." Seungmin whined.

"It's our birthday, every room is our room."

"Felix get the water guns." Changbin ordered, preparing for battle.

Changbin (our birthday boi! ❤️🎂)

° Very clingy, even though it's your birthday as well he will want to be babied as much as he can get. He'll baby you to return the favor, but please just cuddle him all day to make his birthday wishes come to life.

° Takes you out to a restaurant with no members, just the two of you dining together. He will insist on wearing party hats to the very fancy restaurant, getting weird looks from the posh and frugal diners that surround you.

° Even though he is sited earlier on being babied, whenever you suggest that you can help pay for the meal he always denies it and pays fully. And when whine asking why he's spoiling you, he explains that it's your birthday, you deserve it.

° Will rent out a hotel room on the top floor, taking a few selfies with you to post on instagram, captioning a long rant about how he feels so special to have met such a wonderful person who shares his birthday.

"You don't have to pay Binnie, we can go half-"

"I insist, it's your birthday you deserve it."

"But it's your birthday too."

Hyunjin

° He shows you off 10× harder than he usually does, you simply did his hair in the morning cause you wanted to. And she showed it off to all of the members, staff, and fans who were watching the stray kids daily vlogs.

° The members will purposely celebrate you more for the first half of the day, just to annoy Hyunjin. But they always soften up and congratulate him too, making him go back to his usual confident prince aura.

° Wants kisses 24/7, and will become pouty if you deny any of them. Always whining, saying that it's his birthday wish to kiss you. That sentence alone always makes you cave in and kiss his adorable pout away.

° Will read your letters for you while you open the gifts, when it comes time to open his gifts you will return the favor and read the letters. Once he reaches your gift, without even opening it he will say it's his favorite gift out of them all.

"Now for the best gift of the night."

"But you haven't even opened it yet."

"I just know it is the best."

Han

° Wakes you up with a birthday song, forcing his members to sing it with him and dance to it. The only ones who truly get into the song are Chanbin and Felix. You were a bit surprised to see all eight guys surrounding your bed.

° Will set a cute date in the JYP café, sharing your favorite pastry and his favorite pastry with each other. You two hoped to be left alone, but some fans decided to visit the café and give Han this huge cake while ignoring you.

° After Jisung began to notice more fans surrounding the building, he decided to take you back to the dorms where you could finish your pastries and drinks there. Even though it wasn't as 'romantic' it was still nice and calming.

° You both just have a relaxing time together alone, watching you favorite movies and ordering your favorite foods and drinks. Only going to socialize with everyone else when Chan calls for both of you to open the gifts.

"Happy birthday Han oppa, we love you more than anyone else in the world."

"Oh, thank you so much. Umm we actually should get going."

"OMG IS THAT HAN JISUNG OVER THERE?!"

Felix

° You tell Felix every year to not just focus on you, but he truly just can't help himself. Which is why you woke up to a loud clang in the kitchen, to find your boyfriend baking you a birthday cake at 4 in the morning.

° You were about to scold him for trying to spoil you, but he just passes you a spoon with some of the icing and batter on it. You can't stay annoyed with you angel of a boyfriend, especially when you remind yourself that it's his birthday too.

° The reason you tell him to not focus on you, is because if you don't tell him that. He will go overboard, and spoil you more than a Kardashian. Which sometimes makes you feel bad for not spoiling him just as much.

° You both facetime your families together, opening up your presents in front of them and the members. Your mom is crying the whole time because she can't get over how happy you look and how you got with such a nice guy.

"I've never seen my baby look so happy."

"Aww, you are extra smiley around me."

"Can you please just open the gift." Changbin sighs playfully, waiting ten minutes over you two gushing over each other.

Seungmin

° You struggle whenever it comes to buying gifts for Seungmin, just because he is so calm around you and always tells you that he doesn't care what you buy him as long as it's from you. He'll even say he doesn't need gifts.

° He's such a sweet boyfriend so you always want to spoil him, but he always manages to get a more heart wrenching gift than you do. Which is now why you are hunting down different stores with Hyunjin, who hasn't bought him a gift yet.

° You both rush towards the music store, when you bump into Seungmin. He is holding a couple bags full of stuff, and he can't help but smile brightly when he runs into you. Knowing exactly why you two are shopping.

° Hyunjin tries to take a peak at the bags to see if he could get any ideas from them, but Seungmin moves them away as he places a small peck to your nose before leaving the store. Making you lost with questions as to what he got you.

"Seungmin! Hi... W-what are you doing here?"

"Getting your presents ready."

"He's always ahead of the game y/n, I swear."

Jeongin

° You both have a whole birthday week, giving each other small little gifts like candy and chocolates before the big day finally arrives. And that's when the members create this huge party for you two, going all out because they are whipped.

° You and Jeongin will steal some of the balloons and keep them in your room to play around with, playing balloon volleyball with each other when neither of you can get to sleep. He always wins because he slaps the balloon so harshly.

° Will have one last dance alone with you after the party. Both of you in your pajamas in his room as you sway back and forth to a soft slow song. You can hear him humming to song against your shoulder.

° During the party, he made the mistake of pulling you in for feverish kiss. Making Itzy, Twice, Day6, Ateez, TxT, Btob, and Ofcourse Stray Kids all start Hollering. You've never witnessed Jeongin blush so harshly before.

"Get it Jeongin!" Han yelled, making Chan slap his arm.

"They're all staring at us."

"That's because you attempted to French kiss me in the middle of the dance floor."

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reidgraygubler · 3 years

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goldilocks (reid/reader)

Title: Goldilocks Request: no Couple: spencer reid/gen-neutral!reader; spencer reid/ethan; spencer reid/lila archer Category: fluff Content Warning: bi!spencer, kissing/making out, Word Count: 2,102 Summary: spencer recounts all his first kisses A/N: thank you all so much for the support! i really do appreciate it. check out my masterlist!

{***}{***}{***}

When Spencer was 12, he had his first kiss. He was with his only friend, Ethan, in his backyard. They were playing cowboys versus pirates- Spencer being the cowboy rightfully so. Whenever Ethan was over Spencer knew he could be himself, he didn’t have to worry about his mother, or school bullies, or anything else. Ethan was his safe space. Ethan knew that, too.

It was nearing dusk. Ethan was up in a tree, pretending it was the crow’s nest of his pirate ship. Spencer was on the ground, dressed like a cowboy, complete with the lasso and cowboy hat. Their play fight would soon come to an end, and they would have to go in for the night. The two friends knew that their fight would come to an end like it usually does. With Ethan winning and Spencer losing.

Ethan had jumped from the tree, landing beside Spencer before tackling him to the ground. Spencer looked up at his friend, trying to fight him off his body. It was obvious that the smaller of the two boys would lose a fight. The smaller boy knew that too. Although maybe he wanted to lose to Ethan.

“What are you doing?!” Spencer said through giggles. Ethan returned the giggles as he pinned Spencer’s hands to the ground above his head. Ethan looked down at his friend, a smirk growing across his lips the longer he stared at him.

“I won,” Ethan whispered as he lowered closer to Spencer’s face.

Spencer’s eyes widened as he looked at his friend. The young boy knew for a long time that he had a crush on his friend. He’s never acted on his feelings before. The thought passed his mind many times, but he didn’t want to risk losing his only friend.

Until that day. Until the day he and Ethan were playing pirates and cowboys, when he knew the cowboys had really lost (for the hundredth time too). When Ethan still had Spencer pinned to the ground and he was rubbing it in his face that he had won. It was then did he realize he wanted to kiss Ethan. It was something he wanted, a curiosity that would kill him if he didn’t just do it. And it was a risk, a calculated one, but he knew he wanted to take it.

When Ethan had gotten low enough, Spencer lifted his head and quickly pecked his lips to Ethan’s. After the briefest moment, Spencer dropped his head back to the ground and stared up at his friend.

“Sorry,” he mumbled and looked away when he realized he might’ve messed up. “I was… I was just curious. That’s all.”

“You were just curious?” Ethan asked as he crawled off his friend and sat on the ground beside him. Spencer slowly sat up and nodded.

“Yeah, yeah. J-Just curious.”

Unfortunately, this kiss with Ethan was too soft. But Spencer was too young to know that. He’d learn one day that even though he had the smallest crush on Ethan, that they’d be better off as best friends than anything else.

{***}{***}{***}

When Spencer was 24, he had his second kiss. It was with Hollywood star Lila Archer. He was working a case, and protecting Lila from a possible stalker she had. The two were outside, Spencer was watching Lila swim in her pool. Spencer was very adamant about Lila getting out of the pool, so they could be in the safety of her home. But Lila wasn’t having any of it.

“Five minutes,” Lila begged as she swam up to the edge of the pool. Spencer was standing close, watching her with a worried crease in his brow. “Go get a suit in the house!” She nodded towards the open sliding doors of her home. Spencer looked over at her house and then quickly back at her with a scowl.

“What?! No! I don’t wanna grab a suit! Are you kidding me?!” Spencer shouted, his voice cracking out of annoyance. “Please let’s just go in.”

“Join me,” she pressed as she looked up at him. For a small moment, Spencer considered it. But it wasn’t long enough for him to actually go inside and change.

“No, I'm not gonna join you,” Spencer eventually said. Lila rolled her eyes before pouting.

“Why not?”

“You're being pursued by a psychotic killer who shoots people in the head!” Spencer shouted, again, his voice cracking, again. Lila pushed off the wall of the pool and floated on her back, away from Spencer.

“I'm not gonna stop living my life. I'm just not,” she stated firmly as she closed her eyes. Spencer stared at the woman in the pool, shock growing across his face. Any normal person would be scared, hiding for their lives when they hear that there’s a psychotic killer after them.

“This woman is insane,” Spencer thought the longer he stared at her. Although he was extremely cautious about his surroundings and who was around, he could feel a strange carelessness grow in his stomach.

“Lila, please, I'm begging of you. Will you please get out of the pool?” Spencer pleaded as he squatted down to the pool.

“Really, Spence, you should live a little.”

“Live a little? I've known you 48 hours, I feel like I've already aged 10 years.”

“I can't be that bad,” Lila mused as she swam back to the edge of the pool.

“Yes. no, you are that bad,” Spencer said as he stood back up.

“Fine, can you help me out at least?” Lila asked as she lifted a hand up to Spencer. Spencer stared at her hand for a moment before grabbing it. As he went to help her out, Lila pulled on Spencer’s hand, pulling him right into the pool.

Lila was instantly thrown into a fit of laughter as Spencer re-emerged from the water. He glared over at the girl as he pushed his hair away from his face.

“Yes, very funny. Laugh it up, Lila. Hilarious. My gun's wet. So great. My clothes,” Spencer’s tone was very clearly annoyed with what just happened.

‘I should have seen that coming,’ Spencer thought to himself as he looked at the woman. She smiled as she swam closer to him.

“You should have worn the suit,” Lila giggled as she grabbed Spencer’s tie and pulled him closer to her. Spencer swam closer to her, allowing her to pull him as close to her. She brought her hand to rest on the nape of his neck. And when he was close enough, she pressed her lips to his, quickly deepening it.

Spencer ended it just as fast as Lila started it.

“This is completely inappropriate,” Spencer said as he swam away, leaving Lila behind.

Spencer found a certain attractiveness in Lila, he wouldn’t lie about that. The moment wasn’t right. Would there ever be a right moment between Spencer Reid and Lila Archer? The pair had two wildly different career paths, and two wildly different lifestyles… There would never be a right moment for the two.

Even though Spencer enjoyed this kiss with Lila, it was too rough. It was very heated, and a moment of intense feelings. He began to wonder when he’d find the person who would give him the best kisses, and how long he’d have to wait for that moment.

{***}{***}{***}

When Spencer was 34, he found the person who gave the best kisses. There was more than one factor for why Spencer loved this person, their kisses were just a bonus. Like with Ethan, this person was Spencer’s safe space. He could be himself and not worry about anything. And like with Lila Archer, this person made Spencer feel free and near careless.

His first kiss with this person was… gentle, and sweet. Unlike with Ethan, this kiss wasn’t a quick peck to the lips. It wasn’t out of pure curiosity. Unlike with Lila, it wasn’t rushed and heated. It wasn’t because they wanted it. It was because they both wanted it.

It wasn’t their first date, not even their sixth date. In fact, they weren’t even on a date. Spencer had invited the BAU team over to his house to meet this person. The team had been excited to meet them since Spencer first spoke about his person. And after the team left, it was just Spencer and his person. Their first kiss just happened. They weren’t expecting it.

They were sitting on the couch, a movie playing- though neither of them were watching it. The couple was too busy talking about cleaning up the mess their dinner party had left behind, and when a good time to clean it would be.

“Do you want me to get ants? Because this is how I get ants,” Spencer said as he gestured towards the coffee table and the several plates and cups that occupied it. His person laughed before moving even closer to him. Even though they were already pretty close to cuddling, his person wanted to be even closer to him. “But what’s stopping us from taking care of the mess in the morning?” they asked as they looked up at Spencer. He sighed before looking back at his person. “I’m just saying, Spencer,” they whispered before shifting to his lap. Spencer’s eyes met theirs, and a small smile grew across his lips.

“Okay, okay, we can take care of it in the morning. If I get ants though I’m blaming you,” he laughed as he wrapped his arms around his person’s waist.

“I’ll take full responsibility!” they shouted, jumping and nearly falling backwards off his legs. Spencer laughed before pulling them closer to safety. Instead of falling off his legs, his person fell closer to him. “I’ll clean up first thing in the morning. Promise!” They wrapped their arms around Spencer’s neck.

“So now you’re spending the night?” Spencer raised an eyebrow as he looked back at them. They smiled before nodding lightly. The couple drifted closer together.

“If that’s okay. If not, I can go home after the movie is over,” they whispered before cocking their head to the side. Spencer looked at their eyes before glancing at their lips for a brief moment.

“It’d be the first time you spend the night here.”

“I don’t have an issue with that,” they shook their head and smiled. “Only if you don’t have an issue.” It was his person’s turn to look between his eyes and lips. They both wanted to kiss each other, but were both afraid. Spencer knew his person wanted to kiss him. And his person knew he wanted to kiss them.

“No issue here,” Spencer replied, although he wasn’t sure if it was a response to them spending the night, or giving them permission to kiss him. But he replied...

“Good,” they whispered before pressing their lips to Spencer’s. He hummed before bringing his hands to their cheeks. It only took a moment before he deepened the kiss.

Spencer had never kissed a person like he kissed his person. He could feel a fire grow in his chest. His arms wrapped around their waist and he pulled them onto his lap.

It felt like ages before they broke apart. In that moment, all they wanted to do was just be with each other and be in each other's space. But they knew they couldn’t. There were still things they had to do before they went to bed.

“We… We should clean up,” Spencer whispered, just so the silence would go away. His person laughed before tumbling off his lap. His hand caught their’s, stopping them from going any further. They turned around and looked down at him.

His person admired how his cheeks were flushed, his hair was tousled just right, and his lips were still pink from being kissed raw. He had a slight dazed look in his eyes.

“I like it when you look like you kissed someone. I like it even more when I know I’m that someone you kissed,” his person whispered. Spencer laughed and nodded.

“I like it even more when you’re the person I kissed, too,” he whispered as he pulled them back down to his lap. “What’re you doing?”

“Going to clean, like you said.”

“We can clean in the morning.”

There was no curiosity with this kiss, and he wasn’t hesitant. Spencer knew, 100%, that he wanted this kiss. And he was happy that this kiss was perfect. Better than the kiss with Ethan. Better than the kiss with Lila.

Spencer was happy he’d be spending the rest of his life with his person.

if you have any comments/questions about this part, let me know here! please consider reblogging or leaving a comment if you're a part of the taglist. it's so much work tagging everyone.

taglist: @thebluetint @mggsprettygirl @muffin-cup @misshale21 @spenciegoob @reidspoet @kuolonsyoja @broken-stardust @rainsong01 @beepboopboopbeep @babebenhardy @flipperpenguins @itsmyblogandillreblogifiwantto @ash19871962 @samaraaaaa

tags that didn’t work: @isabellasimps

#shadow writes stuff #masterlist #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fan fic #criminal minds fan fic

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wiypt-writes · 3 years

Text

Stark Spangled Banner

One Shot: April Fools (You Can’t Kid A Kiddo)

Intro: It’s April Fools’ Day and Tony is out to play. Avengers, beware!

Warnings: Bad language, very mild smut…no one gets naked but just in case- NSFW, 18+

Pairings: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

A/N: Happy April Fool’s Day! To celebrate I’m taking us WAY back into the SSB timeline, this takes place at some point just before the AOU timeline.

Word Count: 6k

Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar Katie Stark and the other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.

Stark Spangled Banner Masterlist // Main Masterlist

Steve’s hands were hot on Katie’s hips, gently gripping her bare skin just above her underwear, the top she was wearing riding up slightly. Her bare thighs were straddling his as he gripped her neck, pulling her down for a searing kiss, grinding up against her, the TV programme they had been watching was long forgotten.

“You know,” Steve pulled back slightly to look at her, one of his hands tangling in the hem of the plaid button down she’d stolen from him to sleep in, as usual, “Captain America doesn’t approve of theft.” “Captain America is an ass hole.” Katie grinned back. “Stevie is my favourite.”

He gave a chuckle and leaned back against the sofa cushions, simply taking in her appearance for a second. “How did I get so lucky?” He asked, reaching up to tuck her long hair behind her ears. She smiled at him, her cheeks slightly flushed.

“What’s brought this on?” Her hands slid up his chest, coming to a stop on his shoulders, fingers gently playing with the collar of his polo shirt.

“Nothing.” He shook his head. “Just seeing you now and then before with that reporter…reminds me about how fierce…” he pressed a kiss to her lips, “and loyal…”another kiss, “and downright sexy you are when you’re angry.”

“He was a dick.” She mumbled, against his lips, her eyes narrowing slightly as she pulled back to look at him, his fingers gently tracing the outside of her thighs. “I mean, it’s not like we haven’t already launched the publicity campaign for the book already.”

“Well its big news.”

“Of course it is, its Harlan Thrombey.” Katie shrugged. “His books are huge!”

“Did you ever get to the bottom of why he’s reached out to SIP to run the next one when he has his own publishing company?” Steve asked and she popped a shoulder in response. “Oh something to do with his Son annoying him and needing to be taught not to take things for granted. I can ask him that in October when I meet him to go over the final edit and discuss the covers and stuff…” She wrinkled her nose as her brow creased into a frown. “But that’s by the by. That ass-hat reporter should have been at the press launch like everyone else, not trying to accost us when we went out for lunch. And what the fuck has whether we’ve set a wedding date got to do with it anyway? Nosey bastard.”

Steve chuckled at her rant and looked at her, his eyes shining. “We haven’t set one though.”

“Yeah well, we’ve kinda had a bit going on.” She pondered. “I mean, there was my extended vacation in Canada…”

“Don’t.” Steve shook his head, swallowing. “It’s not funny. I hate it when you do that.”

Katie chuckled. “I’m sorry, baby.” She leaned over and gave him a soft kiss, he hated it when she made light of her HYDRA ordeal. She pulled away, her hands resting on his shoulders. “Maybe once all this business with the sceptre is sorted we can think about it.” Steve sighed. “It’s certainly taking a little longer than we hoped.”

“Well it’s only the end of March. I’ve always wanted a summer wedding so it’s not…” Katie trailed off and Steve saw her eyes widen and her mouth dropped open as she looked at him. “Oh shit.”

“What is it?” he frowned.

“It’s the 31st March.” She looked at him, swallowing and Steve felt the colour draining from his face.

“Crap.” The reason for their horror was simple. Because, forget Christmas or Thanksgiving, April Fools’ Day was Tony Stark’s favourite time of year, as his long suffering sister could testify. When she was a kid, Tony had done the usual stuff. Flour in her talc, washing up liquid in her shampoo, paper shapes of bugs (never spiders though, he wasn’t that cruel) in lampshades so when she turned the lights on she’d think she had a huge cockroach in there, that type of stuff. But, as she matured, so did the pranks. At one time whilst she had been at the tower for a meeting, JARVIS sent her an alert that someone had slashed her tyres in the carpark. She had sprinted outside to find photos of Slash from ‘Guns and Roses’ struck to the side of her wheels. Another year, Tony had hacked her StarkPhone and Laptop and changed the language to Chinese. Of course she couldn’t read fucking Chinese to change it back. When she found an agent in SHIELD who did and he reversed it for her, within thirty seconds it had flicked over to Russian. And when Natasha fixed that it became Swedish and so on and so on… Steve had also been the butt of a few pranks since he had known Tony. In 2013 he had fallen for the old toothpaste Oreo trick when a box had arrived for him allegedly from the cookie company themselves after Steve had been papped eating a packet. That had nearly made him sick. And then last year there had been the non-stop phone calls asking for Franklin. Every time it was someone different and Steve was getting more and more frustrated as to who exactly Franklin was and why people thought he was on his number. Then, as he and Katie had been on the sofa making out, he’d gotten one last call…

“Leave it…” she urged, her hands on his face turning him back to look at her. He kissed her again, hands sliding up the side of her torso, grinding his crotch down onto hers making her purr with delight as her hands strayed to the buckle of his belt, soft fingers gently skimming his abs as she made to undo it, his tongue tangling ferociously with hers as he gave a soft moan of pleasure… But his phone was going again. Katie sighed as he dropped his head to her chest, mumbling a curse. “Unless that’s a Code Red, you can tell whoever it is to fuck off.” She gave a frustrated growl, her head flopping back against the cushion as Steve reached over and answered it, still led over her. “Rogers.” He spoke sharply. It was another unknown number, but this time it wasn’t an unknown voice that spoke. “Hi this is Frankin!” Tony greeted him and Steve let out a growl of frustration as he realised he had been had. “Have there been,” there was a pause as the inventor laughed, “I’m sorry, have there been any calls for me?” “Tony, I swear to god!” He spat through gritted teeth as the inventor cackled and hung up. “Your brother is a dick.” He looked down at Katie, shaking his head. “Well yeah, I know that.” Katie looked up at her boyfriend. “What did he just do?” “You know those calls I’ve been getting all day, the ones asking for Franklin?” He looked at her and she nodded. “It was him.”

Katie paused and then let out a laugh. “To be fair, that’s a pretty good one.” “I hate him.” Steve mumbled, dropping his head back to her chest.

She chuckled again, and ran her fingers through his hair. “Hey, Stevie, wanna get him back?” “How?” Steve queried, propping himself up on his elbows, looking at her. “Call him,” she grinned, leaning up and nipping at his jaw line softly as he closed his eyes, “leave the phone on the table,” she bucked up under him, wriggling her hips, his trousers feeling uncomfortably tight again, “and let him listen to us make out”

Steve hadn’t done that, because, well frankly the thought of anyone listening to them wasn’t a great turn on in his books, let alone her brother, so Tony had gone another year of getting away with it.

Simply put, Tony was king of the pranks, and this year he had the entire team at the tower to torment.

“We should warn the others.” Steve looked at Katie, and with a sigh she nodded. She untangled herself from him and straightened the legs on her denim shorts.

“JARVIS?” She asked.

“Yes Miss Stark.” “Where are the rest of the team?”

“Agent Romanoff and Agent Barton are in the Common Room. Thor is in his quarters as is Mr Stark and Dr Banner is in the Lab.”

“I’ll cover Nat, Clint and Banner.” Steve nodded. “You wanna go see Thor?”

Katie nodded. “Sure, I’ll pop down and see him now. Then we should probably go for a look around, see if we can spot if he’s set anything up.” Katie climbed off his lap and Steve straightened his pants slightly before giving her a quick kiss and heading towards the stairs whereas Katie made her towards the hidden elevator, selecting the right floor. Thor and Clint shared one of the highest floors in the tower, both preferring to be higher up, closer to the roof but it was still below theirs. Exiting the elevator, she turned left and knocked on the door.

“Little Stark?” Thor answered and stepped back. “To what do I owe this pleasure?” “It’s not strictly pleasure I’m afraid Thor…” Katie sighed “I’m here with a warning.” “A warning?” he frowned.

“Yeah, you got five minutes? It’s gonna take some explanation.”

***** Tony was giggling to himself as he put the final touches to the last of his pranks, before closing the door to the Lab and heading back to his floor. It was ridiculously early in the morning, but needs must. There was no way he could have set this all up the previous evening because Kiddo and Spangles would most likely have done some kind of recon mission before they went to bed.

So, as the saying goes, the bird catches the worm and all that. Fuck Killian and his second mouse bullshit.

“What have you been doing?” Pepper mumbled to him as he walked back into their dark bedroom.

“Nothing.” He answered, with a grin, leaning down to give her a peck.

“Bullshit.” Pepper mumbled against his lips. “It’s April Fools’ Day…” “Is it?” he said, innocently and she rolled her eyes. “JARVIS?”

“Yes Sir?”

“Hey buddy, I need you to set up an alert for me for today. If anyone goes into my office, or the garage, or anywhere in the tower messing with my equipment, I wanna know about it.”

“Of course Sir.”

Tony grinned as he headed into the bathroom for a shower. “Avengers, assemble!”

Prank 1.

Steve was the first victim. He and Katie were making their way, cautiously, down to the large meeting room where they were all due to congregate to look over the plans of an abandoned British prison they suspected of being a HYDRA base. They made sure to check round each corner before they walked round it, checking up high, low, everywhere.

But there was no avoiding this prank.

Steve pressed his palm to the Biometric Pad on the meeting room door and the pair of them gave a loud yell and a jump as their ears were assaulted by a sudden chorus.

“Who’s strong and brave here to save the American Way? Who vows to fight like a man for what’s right, night and day?”

“Oh for fucks sake!” Steve groaned as he pulled open the door, the song echoing through the PA system.

“Who will campaign door to door for America? Carry the flag shore to shore for America? From Hoboken to Spokane? The Star Spangled Man with a plan!”

Clint and Natasha were stood, poised at the table, both wearing identical looks of astonishment on their faces. They turned to Katie and Steve as they walked into the room, the song still playing.

“We can’t ignore there’s a threat and a war we must win! Who’ll hang a noose on the goose-stepping goons from Berlin?”

“I’m assuming this means Cap is the first of us to fall victim to Stark?” Clint asked, his lips quirking into a smile.

“Who will indeed lead the call for America? Who’ll rise or fall, give his all, for America?”

“Please tell me it isn’t going to go through a full rendition.” Steve sighed, dropping into a chair.

“Who’s here to prove that we can? The Star Spangled Man with a plan!”

Silence. The four of them waited with bated breath, but thankfully it had stopped.

“Just the first two verses.” Katie flopped down next to him. “Suppose we should be grateful.” “Kiddo, you’re as much of a sneak as Tony.” Clint looked at her, as Thor walked into the room. “How come you’ve never managed to get him back?”

“He’s too smart.” She sighed. “I’ve tried and tried before. It doesn’t help that he has JARVIS either, watch this…JARVIS?”

“Yes Miss Stark?”

“Has my brother got an alert going for you to warn him if we try and prank him?” “I couldn’t possibly comment, Miss Stark, on whether or not your brother has an alert set up to warn him if any of you attempt to tamper with any of his equipment.”

Normally, Katie would chuckle at the AI’s tone but she was too frustrated with her brother and the seeming lack of loopholes in any of his instructions she could exploit. She leaned back in her chair and gave a huff “See?”

“I could just shock him with some lightning?” Thor suggested

“Think that’s a little harsh.” Steve shook his head.

“See if you still think that by the end of the day when every time you open a door that song starts.” Natasha looked at him.

“What, you think…” Steve looked at her and then gave a groan. “Too much to hope that it would just be the one door isn’t it?”

_____

Tony, watching the events unfold on the display in the safety of his office, cackled. “Of course it isn’t just one door, Spangles!” _______

Prank 2.

Bruce was sincerely hoping that whatever inevitable prank Tony was going to pull on him that the Billionaire had been sensible enough not to shock him so far that the Hulk erupted. Bruce had a pretty good hold on him, so he wasn’t too worried but still, you never know.

The mild mannered scientist made it to his lab in one piece, opened the door and then stopped dead.

In front of him on the floor, for about two metres square were cups of water. And they were positioned that close together it left no space for him to step over in any direction without them spilling all over the floor.

Which meant he couldn’t get into the room.

Had it been anyone else, they would probably have simply kicked the cups over, but not Bruce. He was always paranoid about the liquid seeping through the floors and down onto the machinery which looked after the Iron Legion.

So if he was going to get into the lab, he was going to have to move them one cup at a time.

“Damned you, Tony!” He gave a loud, exasperated sigh. “JARVIS? I need a bucket…”

_______

Tony, watching the events unfold on the display in the safety of his office, cackled. “Good luck finding one, Brucey.”

_______

Prank 3.

“I don’t think there’s much else to go on.” Steve sighed as the rest of the team finished looking over the plans “We need to get out there and do a recon really.”

“We prepping for another mission then, Cap?” Clint looked at him. Steve took a deep breath and nodded.

“I don’t think we have an alternative.”

“Okay, well, if we get everything ready we can go at first light tomorrow.” Natasha suggested “I’ll get Hill onto the British Authorities, let them know we’re planning on coming.” With that an alert sounded on Katie’s phone and she looked down at it. “I gotta go take a conference call but I’ll be back as soon as I can.” Steve nodded to her as she stood up and left the room. She made it to her office, safely and swung the door open, pausing just to make sure nothing fell from the door frame. She darted through, took a look round and everything seemed to be in order.

Suspecting Tony of most likely sabotaging her computer or screen, Katie sat down on her chair and a loud horn sounded causing her to scream. Involuntarily, her entire body jumped, and her chair toppled backwards. She went with it, arms and legs flailing and hit the floor with a crash.

After taking a moment to sort herself out she stood up, and looked at the bottom of her chair. There was an air horn strapped to the main leg which mean as soon as she had sat down, it would push the handle causing it to sound.

“I know you’re watching this you fucker!” She yelled, spinning round to the CCTV camera and flicking it off. “I hate you!”

_____ Tony, watching the events unfold on the display in the safety of his office, cackled. “Feeling horny, Kiddo?”

_______

Prank 4.

Given that there was nothing else to do, Natasha decided to head to the gym, as she did every weekday morning, to practice Pilates. It was a routine she tried not to break as it helped her keep supple and relax. Katie sometimes joined her, and surprisingly so did Steve. He said it helped keep his mind clear.

She knew that the routine made her an easy target for one of Stark’s pranks, but she was damned if he was going to catch her out. She was one of the world’s best spies, no way was he going to get her with some stupid, childish trick.

She entered the room and glanced up and around, checking the corners, you name it. Satisfied that no one was going to jump out at her, and even if they did, she’d floor them- more fool you, Stark- she leaned up against the bench and stretched her legs out.

“Who’s strong and brave here to save the American Way? Who vows to fight like a man for what’s right, night and day?”

Natasha spun to see Steve shaking his head as he made his way into the room in his gym gear

“You joining me or hitting the bag?” She asked as they both tried to ignore the song as it continued ringing from the speakers.

“Joining you if that’s okay?” he said. “I went for a run this morning so…” “Sure.” She nodded, and as the song finally stopped they made their way to the store cupboards, picking out their mats. Natasha picked her favoured one, and lay it down on the floor.

As soon as she stepped on it there was a loud popping noise, like a gun going off, and she jumped backwards, dropping to the floor by instinct.

“Nat,” Steve soothed, a smile tugging at his lips. “It’s okay, no one’s shooting.” Angrily, Natasha stood up and stalked over to the mat. With a furious movement, she reached down and pulled it up off the floor and set about examining it.

“Bastard!” She exclaimed, slipping her hand into a small, almost invisible hole on the underside. She pulled out a tiny little firecracker, the type that kids used to throw on the floor in front of someone to make a loud bag. “He’s filled my mat with these!”

______

Tony, watching the events unfold on the display in the safety of his office cackled. “Even Super Spies get fooled, Romanoff.”

_______

Prank 5 and 6.

Later that day the team met in the common room for lunch. Steve already had a headache from that damned song following him every time he opened a door, Katie was sporting quite a sore elbow after falling harshly on the floor, Bruce was pissed as it had taken him a good hour to get rid of the cups of water, and Natasha was seething at the fact she’d been caught out too.

“I don’t know how you’ve put up with it for your entire life.” Clint said to Katie as he opened the fridge, pulling out a can of his favoured Dr Pepper. He grabbed a glass and then went to the dispenser for some ice, the way he always liked his soda, but nothing happened when he pressed the button.

“What the...” Clint frowned as he opened the freezer compartment and reached into the dispenser tray. After rummaging a little he stopped, and pulled something out before he gave a huge bellow of laughter. He turned, holding up the item and Steve glanced over to see it was a Tupperware tub that was full of ice, in the middle of which was frozen a Captain America action figure. There was a pause before the rest of the team fell about laughing and Steve groaned, shaking his head.

“Why has he picked on me two times?” he looked at Katie who gave a shrug.

“You know what he’s like, annoying you is his favourite pass-time.”

“You wanna go back in the freezer, Cap, or in the sink to deforst?” Clint asked and Steve rolled his eyes.

“I took a long enough nap in the cold, thanks.”

Clint tossed the offending item into the sink and then reached for some ice cubes before he walked over to where the rest of the team were sat on the sofas with various lunch items on the coffee table. He poured the soda into the glass and set it on the table, still chuckling.

“You can stop looking so smug.” Katie turned to him. “He’ll get you eventually, you too Thor, there’s no way he hasn’t set one up for you both.” “I am mighty, Little Stark.” Thor grinned, nursing a plate of his favoured chocolate and sugar covered strawberries he had snaffled from a tray in the fridge. “It will take more than…” “SHIT!” Clint exclaimed, and with a loud yell they all jumped back as the soda in his glass was exploding over the top with such veracity it was showering them all in the sticky drink. As Steve and Natasha headed to grab some paper towels, Katie marched over to the freezer and yanked out the ice dispenser tray.

“He’s put fucking Mentos in the ice cubes!” She groaned with a shake of her head. “Jesus Christ!” “You gotta hand it to him.” Bruce sighed, wiping his glasses off on his shirt. “This is maximum effort.”

“Oh, I’d like to hand it to him,” Katie mumbled, “with my fist closed.” Thor gave a chuckle and popped a strawberry in his mouth, before he gave a grimace, gagged and spat it back out onto the plate.

“That’s-” he stood up, nearly pushing the coffee table over in his attempt to get to the sink.

Katie watched him as he grabbed a glass of water and filled it from the tap.

“What…” Natasha looked at Bruce who was examining a piece of the fruit, holding it in front of his nose.

“Salt.” Thor mumbled as he rinsed his mouth out. “It isn’t sugar, its salt. He put salt on my Chocolate Sugar Fruit!”

_____

Tony, watching the events unfold on the display in the safety of his office, cackled. “Ice Ice baby… no need to be so salty.”

_______

*******

“We have to get him back.” Natasha grumbled as they all sat in Katie and Steve’s apartment, having retreated to the relative safety as their living quarters were the one place there was no CCTV, and Katie had the authority to banish JARVIS from earwigging. (Tony had learnt that lesson one day after hearing something he really didn’t want to hear…)

“Believe me I’ve tried.” Katie sighed “And you heard J before, anyone tampers with his equipment and…” She stopped dead. That was it. That was the loophole. With a smirk she looked round the assembled faces. Steve arched an eyebrow at her, he knew that look very well.

“What you thinking?” He asked and she grinned at them all.

“I have an idea…”

They listened attentively, Clint and Natasha sharing a grin as she outlined her plan whilst Thor slapped his thigh with glee. Steve leaned back in his chair and looked at Banner who was also smiling ear to ear.

“That might just work.” Bruce nodded. “It’s a pretty good loophole, and we have the stuff in the lab so…” “I’ll need a distraction.” Katie mused, “something that’s gonna draw Tony out of his office for long enough for me to do it but…” “That’s easy.” Thor nodded. “I’m sure I can cause a good deal of noise in the Training Facility, break a few things with my hammer.”

“Fry something.” Steve looked around. “If you do that then JARVIS won’t be able to fix it remotely, Tony’s gonna have to get his hands dirty.”

“You all know what you’re doing?” Katie grinned as everyone nodded. “Okay, Avengers, let’s do this.“

Operation Payback.

Tony heard the bang seconds before JARVIS spoke

“Mr Stark.”

“What the hell was that?”

“There’s been an incident in the Training Suite.”

“Course there has.” Tony rolled his eyes in exasperation at how stupid they thought he was. He wasn’t falling for a distraction like that. “Where is everyone?” “Miss Stark, Agent Romanoff and Agent Barton are in the shooting range.” JARVIS informed him. Doctor Banner was in his lab, although it appears he is now making his way down to the Training Facility to find out what’s going on. Captain Rogers is already there as is Thor.”

“What’s the incident?”

“It appears Thor has struck the speakers and the access pad with a bolt of lightning.” JARVIS replied. “I’m currently assessing the damage but as a result he is locked in. And he isn’t happy.” Okay, so maybe this was serious….

Tony gave an exasperated groan and pushed his chair from his desk. “Suppose I best go see if I can help. Remember what I said, anyone comes in here and tampers with my equipment…” “Of course, Sir.”

When Tony arrived, Thor was kicking the door to the training facility, waving his hammer irately.

“Thor!” Steve was stood by the glass, attempting to calm him down. “Don’t buddy, we’ll get you out of there.” “I can get myself out.” Thor blazed, raising his hand and Tony blanched at the fact Thor was threatening to send his hammer straight through the wall. It wasn’t an uncommon occurrence for the walls and glass to get damaged but they’d only just had it replaced after Steve and Thor had been practicing using Steve’s shield and Mjolnir to cause an outwards blasting shockwave. It had taken down two walls and completely decimated a bank of computers in the lab on the other side of the floor.

“What’s going on?” Tony asked, and Steve spun to him shooting him a glare.

“I’ll tell you what’s going on!” Thor roared. “That infernal song!”

His hammer crackled ominously again and Tony looked back to Steve.

“He was fed up of hearing Star Spangled Man With A Plan ringing out every goddamned time I opened a door.” Steve folded his arms. “So he lost his temper. And I can’t say I blame him.” “We’ve talked about this.” Tony looked at Thor. “You need to use your words, buddy!” “Words, I’ll give you more than words, Stark!” Thor roared. “Now get me out of here!”

“JARVIS?” Tony asked, looking at the pad on the door. “Damage report?”

“The Circuit is completely fried, Sir.” JARVIS replied. “I cannot access or override, you will need to do it manually.”

“Great.” Tony mumbled. “Let me just go get my tools from the lab.” Mumbling to himself, he set off down the corridor and once he was gone, Thor grinned and tossed his hammer in the air as he gave Steve and Banner the thumbs up before he caught it expertly again in his right hand.

“Good job!” Steve nodded with a smile as he pulled his phone out and dialled Katie quickly. “You’re up.”

****

It took Tony roughly thirty minutes to replace the wires and unlock the door. Thor stormed out, pushed him harshly in the chest before he left down the corridor.

“Guess they don’t have April Fools’ Day on Asgard.” Tony mumbled, rubbing at the front of his shirt.

“To be honest, Tony, it’s pretty annoying.” Bruce sighed. “Can you turn it off now? I mean its almost two in the afternoon.” “Yeah I suppose.” Tony sighed, before he grinned. “Tt was a pretty good one though, right.” “Hilarious.” Steve deadpanned, his hands falling to his belt buckle. Tony flashed him a grin and a shrug before he gathered up his tools and made his way back down the corridor.

“JAR?”

“Yes Sir.”

“Turn off ‘Prank Spangles’ will you, before anyone else breaks more of my tower.”

“Right away, Sir.” “And I’m assuming from the lack of contact no one’s been in my office or anywhere else tampering with my equipment?” “That’s correct, Sir.” “Today has been a good day.” Tony grinned to himself.

Once he was back in his office he sat down at his chair, and went through his emails quickly. He absentmindedly scratched at his beard, which felt a little dry to be honest. But he hadn’t oiled it since that morning. Reaching into his drawer he grabbed the small bottle, tipped a good amount onto his hand and spread it across the expertly groomed whiskers before he continued with his work. It took him a few hours but he cleared his inbox and then decided it was time to face the music. Heading down to the common room he found the rest of the team lounging in front of the TV. They were watching Kitchen Nightmares.

“S’up Kids?” he asked and none of them looked at him. “Okay, alright, I know, sorry if I pranked you but if I buy takeout will that make you forgive me?”

No answer.

“Oh come on!” Tony crossed the room, sinking into a spare arm chair. “I’ll get Thai.”

The team exchanged glances before Bruce gave a sigh. He was always the one to cave first, the mild mannered Scientist found it hard to stay outwardly angry, which was ironic when anyone thought about it.

“To be fair, that trick with the water was pretty clever.”

“Yeah, and I suppose the salt strawberries were a little amusing.” Thor looked at Katie.

She shrugged, her feet resting in Steve’s lap as he was gently running his fingers up and down her calf.

“Lighten up, Kiddo.” Tony sighed, flopping onto an arm chair.

“Payback’s a bitch, and so are you.” She responded simply, still not looking at him.

“You’ve never managed to get me back yet.” Tony snorted.

At that point he noticed Natasha and Clint exchanging smirks.

“What?”

“Nothing.” Clint shook his head.

“I like your beard” Thor suddenly grinned. “I have always admired how you keep it so neat and groomed. Maybe I should trim mine the same way.” Tony frowned. “Oh is this the part where you pin me down and shave it?” He rolled his eyes. “You know I can call my suit to me in like five seconds flat.” “We know.” Steve replied, looking at him and Tony’s frown deepened. The way the Captain’s blue eyes were shining with mirth made him uncomfortable.

He looked round as six pairs of eyes were all completely focussed on him now before Katie cracked up laughing.

“I’m sorry, I can’t…I can’t hold…” her laughter grew more and more as she threw her head back against the arm of the sofa “You look ridiculous!” Tony frowned and without a word stood up from the chair and made his way to the bar to glance in the mirrored surface between the shelves.

Oh. Holy. Jesus.

His goatee. His beautiful goatee…was blonde.

He spun round and the rest of the guys in the room cracked up laughing. Steve had his head thrown back, right hand clutching at his chest as Katie wiped tears from her face whilst Natasha doubled over on her seat. Besides her Clint slapped his thigh, his chuckles loud.

“What…how…” Tony spluttered, looking again at his reflection, before he glared back at the group.

“Slipped a little peroxide in your beard oil.” Katie managed to stutter between laughs, Thor’s loud rumbles continued, punctuated every now and then by a snort from Banner.

“JARVIS!” Tony roared “I told you to tell me if anyone went into my office, or the garage, or anywhere in the tower messing with my stuff…” “I take zero responsibility for this, Sir” The AI responded. “And I believe your instruction was to alert you if anyone entered your office or the garage or anywhere in the tower and messed with your equipment. Technically Miss Stark didn’t touch your equipment, only your Male grooming product. I believe they exploited a loophole.” That made the group laugh even harder as Tony went bright red, spluttering obscenities at JARVIS. Eventually he calmed down and sighed, before he glanced at his sister.

“You know I’m almost proud…” he said, shaking his head. “Almost…”

Katie gave him a wink in response. “You know what they say…you can’t kid a kidder, or in this case Kiddo…”

Tony gave a groan which turned into a resigned chuckle. He could always dye it back. “Good job, I’m impressed.” He mused, before he reached for some ice from the bucket on the bar and sighed. “Empty.”

“Yeah, don’t bother with the stuff in the dispenser.” Clint scoffed and Tony grinned.

“Wasn’t gonna, Legolass.” He grabbed the metal ice bucket and stepped from behind the bar.

“Oh, that reminds me, nice touch with the ice block.” Steve rolled his eyes and Tony looked at him, frowning.

“What?”

“The scale model Capsicle in the ice dispenser-“

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Old Man.” Tony shook his head. “Are you going senile?”

Steve took a deep breath and gave an exasperated sigh. “You don’t need to pretend anymore Tony.”

“Hey, I’m not.” Tony held his spare hand up. “That, as amusing as it was to watch, was not me. Although I’m kinda pissed I didn’t think of it.”

“It wasn’t you?” Steve frowned.

“Nope. I am not Spartacus.”

“Then who…” Steve started to ask but trailed off as he felt Katie’s legs shift a little in his lap. He turned to see her exchange a glance with Thor, biting her lip and then he realised exactly who was responsible. “Oh you are…”

“It was his idea!” Katie pointed at Thor as Steve glared at her.

“Yes, it was Captain.” Thor grinned and Steve turned his attention to the god. “When I found out what this whole Fools Day was about, I decided that I wanted to pull a prank of my own. Little Stark came up with that one. And, I must say, it was highly entertaining.”

Tony chuckled and clapped Steve on his shoulder from behind the couch as he headed off to find ice. “This has definitely been a good day.”

Steve continued to look at Katie, eyes narrowed as she stared back, her eyes twinkling. “Don’t look at me like that, Soldier.”

“Oh, and how am I looking at you?”

“Like you’re utterly and thoroughly disappointed in me.”

“I am utterly and thoroughly disappointed in you.” His eyes followed her as she shifted from where she’d been sprawled across the sofa, so she was sat upright. She sidled up closer to him, and leaned over.

“We’ll call it even for the plastic spider I found in the shower tray.” She whispered into his ear and Steve stiffened a little, before he swallowed and turned to look at her.

“Sorry?” He offered and she snorted, shaking her head. “To be honest, Doll, I didn’t think you’d noticed given your lack of reaction to it this morning.”

“Yeah, well, I grew up with Tony. You gotta try much harder than that to catch me out.”

“Message received, understood and duly noted for next year.” Steve muttered, his eyes flashing cheekily before he leaned down and brushed his lips against hers. “I’ll absolutely learn how to Kid a Kiddo.”

“Don’t count on it, Soldier.” She smirked as he pulled back, and he chuckled, wrapping his arm round her and pulling her close, pressing a kiss to her head.

All in all, Tony was right. It hadn’t been a bad day.

#stark spangled banner #steve rogers #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers fic #steve rogers x ofc #steve rogers x original female character #Katie Stark #mcu fanfic #mcu #avengers #chris evans #chris evans characters

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unbridgeabledistances · 3 years

Note

Prompt: Sandy and Debbie break up and Ian and Mickey each take a side. During the fall out Ian worries that Mickey has the same complaints about Ian that drove Sandy to break up with Debbie. But in the end Mickey reassures Ian that their relationship is nothing like theirs.

hi!<3 thank u so much for this prompt, it was so fun to write! hope u enjoy:)

also this scenario could take place anytime between ep 2 and ep 3 of s11, because ian still has his warehouse job

“Jesus, Debbie, calm the fuck down. You’re being dramatic”

“Sandy, if you call me dramatic one more time, I swear to god. I’m not trying to be controlling I’m just asking you where you were last night, which is a perfectly reasonable question—”

“Reasonable if you were my mother, maybe, but I can go wherever the fuck I want without you needing to smother me all the time! I was on a run with Terry, because I have no money and don’t really know what to do with myself, and I’m never fucking good enough for you, and that’s literally all you need to know—”

“Trouble in paradise,” Mickey commented as he poured Ian some coffee, breaking the silence in the kitchen, where everyone was staring at their breakfasts and listening to the voices shouting upstairs.

Ian rolled his eyes. “Yeah. Debs isn’t known to be the most… secure partner in a relationship.”

“You can say that again,” added Liam, wrapping his poptart in a napkin and shoving it into his backpack. “I’m just gonna eat on the way to school. It doesn’t seem like this screaming is going to stop anytime soon, and while you and Mickey having sex twice a day is bad enough, Debbie and Sandy having a lover’s quarrel has somehow pushed me over the edge.”

Ian smirked and sipped his coffee. “Can you drop Franny off on the way?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

Liam led Franny out of the kitchen, where Ian and Mickey remained, listening to Debbie’s shrill voice drifting through the floorboards.

“Fine, if I can’t know what’s going on in your life, I guess you don’t need to be in mine anymore!”

“Are you fucking serious, Debbie? Why do you need to know where I am, you can barely handle knowing the whereabouts of your own kid—”

Ian and Mickey traded raised eyebrows while Ian silently took a bite of toast.

“Sandy, get out of this house! I don’t need you and your illegal bullshit anyways, all you’re doing is putting me and Franny at risk with Terry and all of his issues—”

“Okay, little miss perfect, but don’t expect me to give a shit when you come crawling back.”

“Fine!”

The door upstairs finally slammed, and seconds later Sandy came stomping down. She looked at Ian.

“Your prissy fucking sister is a pain in my ass. The sooner your whole family realizes that your garbage father is as bad as Terry is, the sooner you’ll hop off of your superiority complex over the Milkoviches and realize that your way of surviving is literally the same as ours.”

Sandy shoved past the kitchen table and out the back door.

Ian breathed out a laugh. “Well, that was an eventful morning.”

“I’ll say,” Mickey agreed, looking at the door Sandy had just walked through. “Do you think I should go talk to her or some shit?”

Ian shrugged. “Nah, I’m sure it’s fine. I’m sure Sandy’ll grow up and apologize for whatever illegal shit she was doing with Terry, Debs will calm down, and everything will go back to the way it was.”

Mickey looked slightly uncomfortable as he placed his mug down on the table. “I mean, she has got a point. I’m sure whatever Sandy was up to was no big deal, Debbie doesn’t need to be freaking out.”

Ian scoffed. “Yeah, if getting involved in all of your dad’s shit is no big deal. Sandy could at least tell Debs whatever she’s up to, that sounds pretty fair to me.”

Mickey stood up, clearing their plates and walking over to the sink. “Whatever, Gallagher. I’m just saying Sandy does have a point about you being marshmallows. If she’s not telling Debbie what she’s up to, it’s probably for her own good.”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean, Mick? Last time you disappeared on a run with your dad without telling me where you were, I literally thought you murdered our PO. How is that better than just telling me you’re hawking some stolen guns or whatever you get up to?”

Mickey distractedly wrung his hands with the dish towel, looking sightly pissed and defensive that Ian would even bring up that onslaught of memories, of their almost-wedding and Ian’s rejection at the courthouse and everything that followed.

“I don’t know, asshole. Maybe because Sandy’s right, and you all can be a little judgy about all the illegal shit. I get that you’re a goody two shoes breaking your fucking back in a warehouse, but that doesn’t mean that everyone needs to work their ass off to make minimum wage like you. I used to do shit for my dad all the time, so does Sandy and she doesn’t need anyone to be her keeper.”

Ian rolled his eyes, taking a final sip of coffee and standing up. “Alright, whatever. I’m gonna be late.” He pecked the top of Mickey’s head as he put his mug in the sink. “Enjoy your hard day’s work of watching TV and jacking off.”

Mickey turned and flipped him off as Ian strode out of the room.

Later that day, as Ian was mechanically checking expiration dates on an order of off-brand crackers, he couldn’t help but replay he and Mickey’s conversation from that morning over and over in his mind. Was Mickey seriously going to defend Sandy for sneaking with Terry behind Debbie’s back? He knew Mickey didn’t give a shit about making minimum wage right now, but was Mickey really going to spend the rest of his life following in his dad’s footsteps, depending on his next heist for cash? And, worst of all, did that mean he was going to live a life of feeling like he needed to hide every move from Ian? Ian knew what he was signing up for when they got married, that being with Mickey always meant some level of scamming and schmoozing; but for some reason, he thought that now that Mickey and his dad had fallen out that Mickey’s existence would stop being so constantly on the brink of incarceration.

He’d expected marriage to be a partnership—but so far, it felt like he and Mickey were on different pages about pretty much everything.

When Ian finally made it home and stumbled in the front door, tired and bleary, Sandy was still noticeably absent from the Gallagher house. Debbie and Franny were in the kitchen, along with Liam who was muddling through his homework at the table. Ian went upstairs and found Mickey laying on their bed, watching some sort of video on his phone at full volume. He didn’t look up when Ian came into the room.

“Hey, Mick. Can we talk for a sec?” Ian asked, taking off his hat and coat and gingerly placing them on the bottom corner of the bed.

Mickey still didn’t look up from his phone. “Don’t know what the fuck you want to talk about.”

Ian sat on the edge of the bed. “Did… Sandy and Debbie make up yet?”

Mickey huffed. “What d’you think.”

“Guess not. How’s Sandy doing?”

“Don’t know, haven’t heard from her yet. Figure she’s just off somewhere blowing off some steam.”

Ian approached the next topic with caution.

“So, uh, I was thinking. And I think we need to talk again about, y’know, our mutual expectations.”

“This shit again? Listen, we already did this, I know we agreed that we aren’t fucking other people—"

“No, no I mean about other stuff. Not even the money stuff again really, just like… if you’re ever going to go back to doing the shit that Terry does. For example.”

“What the fuck are you even talking about man, you know I don’t talk to that asshole anymore.”

“I know, but—what if you want to do stuff with Sandy, or someone makes you an offer for a big job? What if you end up in jail again? What if you feel the way Sandy does and you feel like you need to hide all this stuff from me, meanwhile I’m just here working my ass off trying to make a life for us—”

Mickey paused the video and finally looked up from the phone.

“What the fuck are you talking about, Gallagher?”

Ian ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t know. I just… I don’t want you to not tell me shit, the way Sandy was with Debbie. I’d rather know what illegal bullshit you’re up to, even if you think it’s going to piss me off. I… I don’t want to lose you again. I don’t want you to have to lie to me, and I don’t want you to go to jail again. I just wanna be on the same page.”

Ian inched his hand over the covers and placed it on top of Mickey’s as he kept talking.

“I know we’ve been fighting a lot lately, not agreeing on stuff. But I just…want you to know that I’m in this. I love you, I’m your fucking husband. I want us to work together, and I don’t want you to think that I can’t handle anything, or that we can’t tackle everything together.”

Ian looked down at their hands, letting the silence swell as he traced Mickey’s palm with his thumb.

“Hey, Gallagher. Look at me.”

Ian met Mickey’s eyes—Mickey was looking directly at him, unguarded and open. It reminded him of the look on Mickey’s face when he had tried to break up with Mickey the first time, back when they were both kids sitting on the front stoop and Mickey had sprinted over when Ian called; when Mickey had split himself open, had told Ian how much he loved him, through sickness and health and everything they were about to go through.

“Sandy’s got her own bullshit to learn. About people caring about her, caring where she is, caring if she throws her life away. But I’ve been here this whole time, and I’ve learned that. Why do you think I used to throw myself into as much risky bullshit as I could, before I was locked up? I was losing myself in everything, because all I ever wanted was this.”

He put his hand up to Ian’s face—a small gesture, but probably the most intimate touch he’d given Ian in weeks. It stung like ice and fire on Ian’s cheek, like electricity was flickering where his fingertips met Ian’s skin.

“I’ve pointed a glock at my asshole dad’s head and been willing to take the bullet for this. I’m not getting involved in any shit that can take you away from me, Gallagher. Am I going to stop forging my payroll for my PO? Or stop selling shitty expired brownie mix? Probably not. But I’m not gonna do anything risky, anything that might take me away from you for good. Never was.”

Ian sighed. He was being stupid, and he knew that. But between all of their senseless bickering the last few weeks, he couldn’t help but worry that Mickey was feeling more and more indifferent about this whole marriage situation, or getting restless about being pinned down. He listened earnestly as Mickey continued talking.

“How many times have I told you—my family was never there for me. You’re the only family I need. And I made that shit official when I put a ring on your finger, or I guess when I forced you to put one on mine. I’ve always been there for you, I’m always gonna be there for you. We fought long and hard enough for this, Gallagher. You just gotta believe in me.”

There it was—that fondness in Mickey’s eyes, the softness that he tried to hard to hide, but showed up anyways as he was tying Ian’s tie, or holding him close through a wave of depression, or kissing his forehead when he gave Ian his meds. Mickey was never going to let anything come between them again, not after all the pitfalls and heartbreak they’d been through—Ian realized that now, even more than he already had.

“I know, Mick. I believe you.”

“You’d better, asshole. Now c’mere.”

Mickey led Ian’s chin forward, and their lips met—just a ghost of a touch, at first, but it made Ian grab the back of Mickey’s neck and pull him in closer, fiercely slotting their lips together again and again.

They broke apart, and Ian smiled sheepishly. “Sorry for freaking out.”

“I’m all yours, Mr. Milkovich. Whatever shit our families get into can’t change that.”

#shameless #gallavich #gallavich fic #shameless fic #ian gallagher #mickey milkovich #ian x mickey #debbie gallagher #sandy milkovich

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anothertimdrakestan · 4 years

Text

Light Of My Life Pt.2 Jason Todd x Reader

Words: 2.5k

Requested? Yes! From a lovely returning anon!

“I’m the anon who requested the avenger reader and ......... *chefs kiss* *chefs kiss* *chefs kiss* It’s so good! i love the readers powers and how they get sparky when they’re happy! I always thought that captain America and tony stark and Natasha and everyone else would be protective of the reader so I wonder what would happen if she introduced Jason to the avengers? Do you think they’d find out that he was red hood? (And they’d keep it a secret but maybe then they’d be REALLY protective)”

LINK TO PROMPTS -> REQUESTS ARE STILL OPEN!

HI AGAIN IM SO GLAD YOU’RE BACK LOVE!!! We been knew I love me a good protective family and Jason sooooo my beautiful anon you did it again! Chef’s kisses right back at you angel <333 Because you liked the happy sparks let me show you what happens when all the emotions come out to play.... mwahahahaha CHECK OUT PT 1 HERE!

“Fuck no.”

You rolled your eyes at your boyfriend as he pouted. “Hey I met your family you have to meet mine!” you chided, Jason had been reluctant to meet the other Avengers. The last time he’d ever met one besides you was as Robin pre-death when Stark came to visit Bruce Wayne and Iron Man visited Batman. The two never really got along and since Jason idolized Bruce he hadn’t been the kindest to Stark.

You’d only recently learned this when you told the other Avengers why you always wanted to be in Gotham. Cap was happy you’d found a friend, he understood the necessity of having a person you can talk to and rely on, and he missed his person so he wished you the best. To say Stark was pissed was an understatement. Not only was he secretly rooting for you and Spidey to get together but he always got a bad taste in his mouth thinking about the Wayne family. “No” was his only reply and you had to give him the “even though you’re my father figure and my boss you don’t control my personal life” speech which ended in a hug and some cursing under his breath. To your surprise Peter was equally upset and said next time you went to Gotham he needed to meet this elusive, powerless, gun wielding, Jason.

And just like that here you were in Gotham, wrapping in your boyfriend’s arms, trying to convince him to come meet the “A-list” as he called them. “You’re going Jay. Maybe you can bring Tim he loves the Avengers he’d die to meet them!” you cooed, knowing Jason would agree because he never wanted to tell you no. Jason knew how excited you were, he could feel the light shocks that danced on your skin as he held you. Begrudgingly he agreed. You had decided it would be better to meet as your human personas rather than stir up the media with an Avengers visit to Gotham.

“Hey gorgeous” Jason grinned as you gave him a spin in one of your favorite outfits, beyond excited to introduce him to the people who were your family you rushed over to him. As you toyed with his t-shirt collar you admired his appearance, Jason was fashionable in the lowkey, vibey kind of fashion, it was perfect, and undeniably attractive. You could tell he was trying to hide his nerves, he gripped your hand tighter than normal and fidgeted slightly, he knew these people were your home and you could tell he wanted to make a good impression even if he wouldn’t admit it.

You’d invited them to your now shared apartment with Jason. The two of you had spent a while cleaning and prepping for guests and the apartment was spotless. Getting the text from Stark that him, Peter, and Natasha were headed up and you saw the three of them cloaked in jackets and hats entering the main lobby. Giving Jason’s hand a squeeze you gave him a quick peck on the cheek and a reassuring looking. Jason leaning into your embrace whispered “it’ll go fine” and you couldn’t tell if he was saying it to himself or you. Almost on cue there was a loud knock and before you could get to the door Tony burst in with Natasha and Peter following. “WHERE IS HE!” Tony yelled and you rushed over grinning. “Shut up Stark behave yourself!” he brought you into a quick hug before looking at Jason. “Hello Todd” he said, Jason looked a little shocked that Tony had either remembered from those years ago or had done his research. Jason stuck out a hand feigning confidence and Tony took it strongly.

Inviting everyone in you all sat cooly around the living room. As you talked with Natasha about recent events and living in Gotham you noticed that Jason looked afraid to touch you, sitting rigid next to you. Glancing over you saw him getting death stares from Peter and Tony anytime he moved a muscle. “The two of you stop it!” you chided, grabbing Jason’s hand and realizing it was slightly shaking. “I expect it from Mr. Father Figure but really Parker?” you quipped as he shrugged in agreement.

You could feel your aura radiate with annoyance and Peter and Tony looked taken aback. “Hey Sparky- Y/N it’s fine” Jason looked embarrassed at his use of one of his many nicknames. “Dude you use electric puns too!” Peter looked excited as he told Jason about some of his favorites. As the two bonded you groaned when Peter said “DUDE LIGHTNING MCQUEEN IS SUCH A GOOD ONE!” and went in for a high five over your embarrassment. Tony broke the bro-moment, “So Jason Todd, second Robin, heard you died. Haven’t seen you in a bit do you prefer Todd or Hood?” Jason gulped, straightening up as he squeezed your hand. “Um, Todd is fine, yeah I did and it was really hard but I have Y/N and she’s really been amazing and also yes I was Robin when I saw you a long time ago and you totally already know that but yeah” he took in a deep breath as Tony processed his answers. Turning to you he asked “and he’s nice to you? Good friend? Good lover? No ring yet right? I learned the hard way waiting too long isn’t great but you better not rush this kid” you rolled your eyes hearing the same line of questioning as always. “Tony shut the hell up” Natasha interrupted. “Look, Jason’s whole body is angled to Y/N, he’s holding her hand through the sparks and probably shocks, he hasn’t gotten angry at your dumb overprotective dad moments, and everytime one of them looks at the other they calm down a little more. They’re in love Tony leave them be.” Tony starred in silence before standing up, drawing in a breath you could feel Jason tense. “Alright then I approve. Let’s get this party started! You guys got booze?”

A couple drinks in an everyone was best friends with everyone. You and Peter weren’t of age yet so you both skipped but Tony was definitely nicer a couple drinks in, and Jason was a lot less tense even though he wasn’t drinking, determined to stay sober to answer any questions he was asked. Peter still looked like he didn’t trust Jason but you couldn’t help but grin as you watched the only father figure you’d ever had bond with your boyfriend. You finally felt like you had a family, it was perfect.

Perfect until Peter Parker got attacked.

As you frantically zapped through light posts you heard Jason on his bike behind you. Tony and Natasha didn’t want to alert the press with two of the most prominent Avengers being seen in Gotham and after a couple drinks they decided to let you and Jason take the lead. So as Red Hood and Y/H/N took to the Gotham streets after Clayface who had engulfed a terrified Peter Parker, Black Widow and Iron Man watched from above.

You zapped in front of Clayface, your skin practically sizzling. “you!” ZAP “are!” ZAP “interrupting!” ZAP “my!” ZAP “DAY!!!” you screeched, letting out all the anger and stress pent up from the day. Unfortunately, your electricity didn’t have much effect on a giant piece of dirt, so you went for keeping it’s attention while Jason fiddled with some explosives.

You zapped around the scene, being careful not to let Clayface get a hand on you for fear of him trying to engulf you too. You could barely hear Jason, cursing yourself for leaving you comm somewhere in the apartment but you could make out “Y/H/N it’s ready but Peter’s in there!” from Jason. “Shit alright I’m going in I guess!” you called, unsure if your powers would even work inside of Clayface. With a deep breath you ran straight ahead, preparing for whatever came next when a figure shoved you out of the way. Instinctively you shot into a lamp post for safety when you saw Red Hood press the button for the explosives and dive into Clayface. Once you realized he just sacrificed his life for yours appeared on the pavement screaming for Jason. Lightning cracked above you as you cried out amid the explosion. At the peak of the explosion everything you felt was too much, needing to know if Jason was okay and it Peter was still alive you felt stuck to the ground. Letting out a guttural scream you gave up trying to hold everything in. The lightning dissipated as you felt your energy connect to every current in Gotham. As the smoke cleared you saw a pile of Clay and no Red Hood and your heart snapped in half. Sinking to your knees you felt the power of every light in Gotham and it was too much. As your tears poured you needed the pain to stop, it had to stop, you’d lost everything.

And then it did. No more sparks, no more current, no more emotion, no more pain.

Your eyes fell out of focus as you stared ahead. You didn’t see two figures emerged from behind the corner of a building. Your eyes were blurry and you felt numb, unable to recognize the voice of Jason as he called out for you. Everything was quiet and muted, no buzzing from the streetlights or vibrations from cell towers, you felt disconnected, lost. Slowly blinking, thoughts of your past boyfriend jolted through you so quickly you couldn’t comprehend the fact that he was right in front of you. His voice sounded like a faint whisper calling for you. A different reality almost. You felt yourself get lifted into the air, off the ground and into someone’s embrace.

This embrace carried you home. Home. That was your apartment. With Jason. But he was gone and someone had brought you home, setting you softly on the couch.

“What the fuck happened to Y/N” Jason pleaded Tony who looked just as confused. “I think she’s in shock, maybe she didn’t have her comm in and didn’t hear the plan for rescuing Peter then dealing with Clayface?” Tony whispered as he looked at you as you stared at a wall, tears slowly cascading down your cheeks. Natasha squatted next to you, waving a hand in front of your face. “She’s in shock but we need to shock her out of it, anyone got a spark?” Tony quickly reprogrammed part of his suit to deliver a fair amount of voltage into your body. Taking a deep breath Jason just wanted to hold your hand but he knew that was not going to be safe until you woke up. As everyone stood back Tony counted down “One, Two - ”

Suddenly you felt the connection again, it jolted through you and danced on your skin, you felt the humming of the fan in your apartment. Your apartment, you were home. Home. Home is with Jason, and you could feel him next to you. Jason, was, home. Safe.

“JASON YOU IDIOT WHAT WERE YOU THINKING YOU FUCKING DIED AGAIN!” you bolted up and began wailing on his chest, shocking everyone around you at your burst of, well, energy. Without thinking Jason just pulled you into his chest, swaying slightly back and forth you melted into his grip. “Y/N baby Stark thought your comm was on like mine and we thought you knew the plan, you were making a good diversion and everything” Jason explained. “Then Parker and I come out after the big boom and you’re like completely zoned out. Like even the sky was clear, and your eyes didn’t have the little sparkle they always have, we thought you’d lost it or something” he rambled as you finally put the pieces together. Glancing up at him you whispered “so you’re okay?” and he nodded, giving you a reassuring smile. “You can’t get rid of me that easily Sparky” you found comfort in the nickname that was slowly growing on you.

After a cup of tea and some relaxation you were feeling a lot better. Peter was impressed at how quickly Jason thought on his feet and that he’d put himself in danger to save him and was a lot happier with your relationship. You’d told him about Tim and how well the two nerds would get along so he tagged along with Stark who was out meeting Bruce and trying to explain why there had been an explosion and Avenger sighting in his city, and Natasha used her expertise to know it was time for you and Jason to have some alone time, so she headed out as well.

Now you were resting in Jason’s arms as he toyed with your hair. Breaking the silence you admitted “I think I severed my powers when I thought you died” and Jason looked up, his face asking you for more. Delving into some of your own truths you admitted “I always knew my powers were emotion driven. Like our kiss that one night. And I knew there was a reason that I have to keep some energy inside and reign it in, but now I know that releasing it all doesn’t explode, it makes me implode on myself. Like the energy I use is raw emotion and when I thought you were gone it hurt too much and I cut it off” you sighed, enjoying the feeling of letting it off your chest. You could’ve sworn Jason slyly wiped a tear away before pulling you in close as he too sighed. “I think you’re right Y/N but that means your powers are more interesting than we ever knew. And I know what it feels like to lose everything, and I’ll spend the rest of my life apologizing for ever being the reason you felt the loss. It kills me to think of you in such pain you couldn’t feel it anymore. Because you are the strongest person I know and I know how painful it must’ve been. I’m so sorry. And I love you”

The big eight letters. They felt right. Raising your head to his you took his lips in yours, trying to convey the same words right back at him. In the moment of pure love you felt warmth envelop your entire body, unable to contain the joy. Mid-kiss you let a grin slip onto your face and you pulled away. “Jason Todd I love YOU!” you moved to throw your arms around him and as you outstretched your fingers you released some of your love into the air and suddenly everything in the room when black.

“Y/N you just shorted out the apartment building. But I love you too” You were kind of glad the lights were now off because Jason couldn’t see the furious blush that developed on your cheeks. Flopping down on to him you mused “Too many emotions for one day, I feel pretty shorted out too” and Jason hummed in agreement. As the two of your drifted off into sleep you heard him mumble:

“You better get control of these emotions I can’t be telling you I love you then having you break my toaster. I need my waffles you know” and you groaned.

“I’ll put that on the list of things to worry about. Right beneath the end of the world so pretty high up there”

“Thanks I appreciate it. Good night my lovely bolt of lightning”

“Goodnight you sappy fuck”

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plainbrunettelbl · 5 years

Text

ABO (A) Fatgum Toyomitsu Taishiro x (O) Reader Candy Cane Lane

Word count: 1140

Warnings: Mentions of blood and almost assault

Title: ABO (A) Fatgum Toyomitsu Taishiro x (O) Reader Candy Cane Lane

Summary: Tai and you go see the Christmas lights together and run into a snag on your way home.

(Gif not mine)

🍬-You had been with your lovely mate Taishiro for about one year now. You got together in the spring so you both had yet to experience Christmas together. Tai wanted to make this first Christmas the best.

🍬-You had already decorated your shared apartment together but haven't done anything else for the holiday season. That’s why when he found a flyer on his way home from patrol about Candy Cane Lane, a whole block filled up with lights and decorations he knew he wanted to take you.

🍬-Not gonna lie he wanted some cute pictures of you among the Christmas lights for his desk at the agency. The thought of you all bundled up and red-faced made him warm.

🍬-You had agreed of course.

🍬-He made sure you were bundled up from head to toe. Scarf, gloves, hat, and jacket all warm and thick. Candy Cane Lane wasn’t too far from your house so you both decided to walk to and from.

🍬-He didn’t need all of the layers as you did so he just stayed in his hero jacket and added a comfortable pair of black sweats to go with it. Some kids recognized him and he was happy to throw candy canes their way.

🍬-You had loved every light-up display and the inflatable snowmen that you both came across. Some of the houses even had Christmas cookies and hot chocolate to sell.

🍬-Tai, of course, bought a dozen and a half. The dozen he munched on while walking with along and the rest for you. You couldn’t finish six whole cookies so you gave the rest to Tai when you had your fill.

🍬-He was more happy to swallow those down as well.

🍬-Your mate was a bottomless pit but you wouldn’t trade him for anything in the world. He was as kind as they come. Filled with nothing but the drive to bring out the best in his interns.

🍬-You went soft anytime you saw him mentoring them. You knew he was going to make an amazing father to your future pups. You two had just bonded not even two months ago so you knew pups wouldn’t be for a while but the thought made your Omega purr.

🍬-Tai had asked you to pose for various different pictures. One in front of a wall filled with Christmas lights and the two of you hugging and beaming to the camera.

🍬-Another of you standing next to a light-up reindeer.

🍬-Every time he would snap a picture he would shower you with compliment saying how beautiful you looked in every single one for them. If your cheeks weren't already flushed from the cold he would have noticed what his sweet words did to you.

🍬-Once you had gone down the block and back he purchased one more dozen Christmas cookies to eat on the way back to your apartment. The night had gotten colder so you huddled into his side more.

🍬-He had taken notice, “I can absorb you until we get home, Sweets.” He offered with a broad smile.

🍬-He loved nothing more than to cuddle with you using his quirk. At first, you were a little hesitant about how it would feel but once you sank into his body you knew regular cuddles wouldn't cut it anymore.

🍬-“Yes, please.” You crooned.

🍬-Normally you would hold out until you reach your warm apartment but you felt more cuddly today so you have in.

🍬-You turned towards him and let him lift you into his strong arms. You were wrapped around him like a koala. He unzipped his jacket a little so your head could peek out.

🍬-Your hat the same color as his jacket. It must have blended in too well since what happened next shocked you.

🍬-“Well, if it isn’t Fatgum.” A voice croaked from a nearby alley. Fatgum turned and tried to get a better look at the figure. All he saw was a covered face and something glinting in his hand.

🍬-You felt Tai stiffen. His Alpha instinct already telling him some bad was about to happen. He knew if it was a gun or knife and he adsorbed the attack it would end up hitting you instead.

🍬-The thought of you blooded and crumbled to the floor made his eyes turn red. His Alpha ready to destroy anything that dared harm his precious mate. He quickly released you from his embrace before pushing you out of harm’s way.

🍬-You might have tripped and fallen flat on your face but he was too focused on the threat at hand. Within minutes he had the guy beaten and slightly more bloodied than usual.

🍬-The others at his agency wouldn’t bat an eye at the battered villain, clearly impressed Fatgum held back enough not to kill him over the harm he could have caused his mate.

🍬-Once he had the guy subdued he ran over to your shaking form. You had tried to stay out of his way but couldn't bring yourself to flee. If things went south you wouldn’t hesitate to step in to protect your Alpha.

🍬-“Are you okay, Y/N?” He rushed, his hands flying over your body to check for possible injuries.

🍬-“I’m fine, Taishiro.” You tried to give him a reassuring smile.

🍬-His brow dipped, “No, you’re not. You have a scratch, Sweets.” He eyed your eyebrow as it had a tiny cut beading blood.

🍬-“It’s nothing Tai. I am just glad you are safe.” You wrapped your arms around his stomach because Lord knows he was too tall for you to wrap your arms around his neck.

🍬-He grumbled before lifting you into his arms.

🍬-“We are gonna go home and eat caramel popcorn while cuddling on the couch. I need you close right now, Omega.” His voice was slightly shaky.

🍬-He didn’t want to think about what could have happened to you tonight.

🍬-“I would want nothing more, Alpha.” You kissed him with a smile. Making sure to send out a purr to calm him down. It worked but you knew he wouldn’t fully settle until you were both back home safe and sound.

🍬-“I love you, Alpha.” You hummed.

🍬-“I love you too, Y/N.” He breathed, making sure to bend down to scent you.

🍬-You ended up exactly how he wanted. Laying on top of him on the couch, munching on caramel popcorn and watching Christmas movies. He has taken care of your cut and would pout every time he would catch sight of the small bandage.

🍬-You would kiss him on the lips every time you caught him frown. His mood would go back to normal after that. He might have scowled a few more times than necessary for more pecks.

🍬-You laughed at his silly antics. He was the best Alpha an Omega could have.

First time writing for FatGum. I don’t read the Manga so I only know what I learned from the anime. I hope he came out alright. I have another idea in mind for him. Hope you liked it! 💕

#my hero academia #bnha imagines #BNHA Headcanons #bnha x reader #bnha taishiro #taishiro toyomitsu #fatgum #angst #Christmas fluff #fluff #bnha fluff #overprotective #pro hero #Alpha #Omega #omegaverse #mates

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obsidiancreates · 4 years

Text

The Crossover Nobody Asked For (VenturianTale and Milo Murphy’s Law)

“Oh, this place is horrid,” Cavendish says, looking out the window as the van rolls into town. “This is barely an upgrade from garbage duty.”

“So there’s a lot of damage. Maybe they’ve just a Murphy in town and no budget,” Dakota says with a shrug.

“... I suppose that’s a possibility. But I don’t believe Milo has mentioned any family living in North Carolina. Especially not a place with a name like... ugh.”

“Come on, say it,” Dakota says, already almost laughing.

“... Butts, Little Butts,” Cavendish sighs.

Dakota laughs, slapping the steering wheel.

“Who even named this place?! And who would live here-”

“WHOA!”

Dakota slams on the breaks as someone runs right out in front of the van.

“It went this way! Come on, Johnny!” a short man in a gray hoodie shouts behind him.

A tall man in a rather fancy outfit jogs into view. “I’m coming, sir! But I-I’ve been stabbed in the leg-”

“IT’S GETTING AWAY- oh, you!”

The short man runs up to the window of Cavendish and Dakota’s van. “Hey! Give us your vehicle!”

Cavendish is slightly taken aback. “Wh- we most certainly shall not!”

“Oh, he’s British! Johnny, come communicate with him in your British tongue!”

“What the devil-”

“Hello, there. I’m Johnny Toast. May we please use you vehicle?”

“More British, Johnny.”

“Oh, right sir, um, tea and crumpets, may we use your vehicle, um, Doctor Who, ah, my grandmother is the Queen of England.”

“... Just drive, Dakota.”

Dakota waves at the two men, and drives away. They hear the short one scream in frustration.

“This town is deplorable,” Cavendish says.

“We’ve only met two people, maybe it’s not so bad,” Dakota points out. “And we haven’t even been to any restaurants yet.”

“Given the state of some of these buildings, I advise against eating anything from here.”

“When has that ever stopped me?”

“Mmm, true.”

They finally arrive at their destination. A shockingly normal looking house, out in the suburbs.

“Well, perhaps this won’t be so bad after all.” Cavendish seems hopeful as the van is parked.

“Yeah, see? We just happened to run across two weirdos. Now let’s find that alien signal Mr. Block sent us here for.”

“I’ll grab the scanner, you introduce us,” Cavendish says, opening the back of the van.

Dakota nod sand heads up to the front door. He rings the doorbell, and waits.

“GERTRUDE! SOMEONE’S AT THE DOOR!”

“I HEARD IT, I’M MAKIN’ DINNER!”

“KIDS!”

Dakota winces. Oh boy, so the people who live here are... loud, to say the least.

“WHERE’RE THE KIDS, GERTRUDE?”

“BILLY IS HIDING FROM MADDIE AND SALLY IS ON A DATE WITH SLENDER! SUE IS SOMEWHERE IN THE MALL!”

Dakota waits a moment, and then rings again.

He hears a heavy sigh. A moment later, the door swings open, and Dakota shouts and stumbles back.

A large man stands in the door, holding a shotgun. With his bald head, beard, and very angry expression, he looks like exactly the type of person you don’t want to bother in the middle of the day.

“Who the heck ‘re you?” he demands in... some kind of... southern? accent.

“Uh...”

“Dakota, have you- oh, hello, are you the resident who lives here?”

Cavendish is either ignoring the shotgun, or hasn’t noticed it yet, somehow.

“Yeah, this is my house, so what’re you doing here?”

“Well, we’ve been sent by an agency-”

“Are you some more of them P.I.E people? I told ya to quit comin’ to my house, you only make the problems worse!”

“P.I.E? No, we’re with an agency called P.I.G-”

“Paranormal Investigators Gourmet?! I don’t remember hirin’ you!”

“... Gourmet- no! No, we’re with the Paranormal Investigation Group-”

“How many ghost huntin’ groups are there?!” the man shouts, presumably in frustration, though a slight bit of laugh slips into his voice.

“... We deal with aliens,” Cavendish says, unsure what else to say.

“Aliens? I KNEW IT! GERTRUDE, I TOLD YA! I TOLD YA THAT THING WAS FROM THEM ALIENS!”

“GOOD JOB, HONEY, YOU DID IT!”

“YEAH! I DID IT, I DID IT!Aw, you can come right on in, provin’ me right. You’re a lot less annoyin’ than the P.I.E people, they’re always talkin’ and sayin’ I’m wrong and not to shoot the ghosts, but they shoot ghosts too so I don’t know what they’re talkin’ about-”

“He’s just talking to himself now,” Dakota whispers to Cav as they follow the man into the house.

Cavendish nods. Maybe this won’t go as well as he’d hoped... He clears his throat. “May we ask for you name, my good man?”

The man stops, and turns around. “My name! Is PAPA ACACHALLA!”

Dakota snorts.

“Why’re you laughin? That’s my name! It’s a great name! Means ‘whole dang universe’!”

“No, no, it’s just I never thought we’d find a more made-up sounding name than his,” Dakota says, pointing his thumb at Cavendish.

“I beg your pardon?!”

“Well, what’s his name?” Acachalla demands, pointing at Cavendish with the shotgun way too casually.

Dakota pushes the barrel of the gun away. “Go ahead, Cav.”

Cav crosses his arms. “Balthazar Cavendish.”

"HA! You British people have the weirdest names! Like that Toast boy! Anyway, the alien thing is out here. Officer Maloney came to look at it, but it isn’t one of his things, and I can’t figure out how to move it! I’ve tried C4, a tractor, Freddie, a nuke-”

“A nuke?!”

“- an’ none of it even dented the thing!”

“Yeah, can we go back to nuke?” Dakota says, eyes wide.

“Too late, we’re here.”

Dakota and Cavendish blink.

Cavendish’s eye twitches “It’s a-”

“It’s a giant metal Kirby,” Dakota finishes.

“Yeah! I don’t want it in my yard! My daughter says it feels like it’s mockin’ her from when she was a Kirby!”

“What in blazes are you- this is no alien technology! This is some kind of... bad sculpture!” Cavendish shouts.

“It dropped right out of the sky!” Acachalla protests. “Maloney said it was alien, and he would know! He’s a bird!”

“A bir- you said he was a police officer!”

“He is! And he’s a bird! Who can be a person!”

Cavendish is fuming. “Dakota, call Mr. Block and tell him we’ve been lead on a wild goose chase!”

Dakota sighs, and heads inside to make the call (for some reason, he can’t get a signal from the yard).

“There’s no wild goose around here! Not after that nuke test, anyway!”

“There’s no possible way you set off a nuke here! This house is still intact, you’re still alive, and there’s no residual radiation in the area!”

“So?”

“SO?! SO THERE WAS NO NUCLEAR EXPLOSION!”

“I don’t think you know how nukes work!”

“YOU-”

“Cav, calm down, he’s holding a gun,” Dakota says in a hissed whisper.

Cavendish takes a deep breath, and collects himself. “Clearly, Mr. Acachalla-”

“Papa Acachalla. My title is Papa.”

“I steadfastly refuse to refer to you as ‘Papa’. Mr. Acachalla, there’s been some sort of mix-up, and this is not alien in-”

The mouth of the Kirby opens, and a being steps out.

“Excuse me, but our craft was broken, and we just got the doors working,” says the being (that looks... weirdly like a... Pokemon?).

“I KNEW IT!” Acachalla shouts. He shoots his gun up into the air, and starts ‘dancing’ (to use the term loosely). “I KNEW IT, I KNEW IT, PAPA ACACHALLA, I KNEW IT-”

Cavendish stares, dumbfounded. “You- you’re actually an alien?”

The alien nods. “Yup, I am!”

“... You sound remarkably human.”

“Thanks! So do you!”

“... Thank you?”

“Do you happen to know where we can get some materials to repair our ship?”

“Well, I suppose I might. What do you need?”

“Macaroni.”

“... What-”

“Hey, we’ve got that!” Acachalla says, stopping his little song and dance. “Just don’t tell the cops. It’s Johnny Toast brand, too, really strong stuff.”

“... Why would macaroni need to be hidden from the cops?” Cavendish asks weakly, shoulders slumped. This is ridiculous, and he feels... defeated, in a way.

“Uh, ‘cause it’s illegal?” Acachalla says with a laugh. “Duh?”

Acachalla leads the alien inside, and-

“WHY’RE YOU EATIN’ OUR MACARONI?!”

Dakota looks up from his bowl. “Uh, your wife offered me some-”

“GERTRUDE, WHAT’RE YOU THINKIN’?! THAT’S OUR GOOD MACARONI!”

A woman in a green sweater peeks out from the kitchen. “Well, he said he was hungry, and it was either this or your old boot!”

“That boot is high in protein!”

“That’s why I’m savin’ it for the kids!”

Dakota puts down his fork. “I think your macaroni went bad, actually, I don’t feel so good...”

Acachalla rolls his eyes. “Duh, you don’t! Have you ever even had macaroni before?!”

Dakota looks up. “Somethin’s weird here...” he slurs.

“Wh- what have you done to him?!” Cavendish pushes Acachalla aside and rushes to Dakota.

“It’s macaroni! It makes the world all wiggly and weird!” Acachalla says, like that’s at all true and common knowledge.

Dakota laughs a little, reaching up to grab Cavendish’s hat. “You’re way taller th’n I remember,” he says, still slurring.

“That is it! We are leaving!”

Cavendish picks Dakota up bridal-style. Dakota grins, and leans up, giving Cavendish a peck on the lips. “Wow, I can stretch really far...”

Cavendish blushes intensely. “That macaroni has clearly intoxicated my partner! You’ll be hearing from the higher-ups over this!” he says, trying to ignore what just happened.

“I think ‘m flying,” Dakota declares as Cavendish carries him back out to the van.

“Dakota, you’re delirious. Just rest until we get home.”

“I feel fine,” Dakota insists, head lolling. “You’re the one who turned into a tomato when I kissed you. From a leek to a tomato...”

“A leek? Is that because of my suit?”

“You’re a-a leek with fluffy wings.”

Cavendish buckles Dakota in. “What on Earth-”

“Like a vegetable angel.”

Cavendish blushes again. “This is terrible. you have no idea what you’re saying,” he says, trying to affirm that fact in his mind.

“You’re a tomato again. Whoa, my hand is made of fresh fries...”

“No, they’re just yellow because they’re covered in cheese.”

Dakota grins. “Smarty-pants.”

As Cavendish goes to shut the door, Dakota grabs him again and gives him another kiss. A long one. Cavendish is in shock.

“You don’t taste like a leek,” Dakota says afterwards, apparently incredibly happy about that fact.

Cavendish, blushing more than he thought was possible, gets in the driver’s seat and starts the car. “We’re never returning here,” he mutters to himself.

Dakota waves at the house as they drive away.

#VenturianTale #milo murphy's law #Dakavendish #Vinnie Dakota #balthazar cavendish #papa acachalla #Johnny Ghost #Johnny Toast #drugs tw #drugs mention #intoxication tw #hallucination tw #fanfic #my attempts at fanfic

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judylicious · 3 years

Text

And When He Smiles I Swear I Can’t Breathe

Alan Rubin x fem!Reader

Word count: 1,548

Fandom: Blues Brothers

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Blues Brothers’ characters or movies. This refers to Alan Rubin as a character in the movie, not the real Alan (although he obvsly played himself but you know what I mean)

I’d like to add that I made everyone of the band a few years younger (so the age gap between the reader and Alan isn’t that big), so he’s approx. in his early 30s.

Sophia & Lisa are two OCs created by two lovely people within the fandom.

Warnings: swearing

Chapter 1

Charlotte took a look at her watch. Where the hell are they?! They better don’t stand me up. After all I got dressed up for their sake only. “What are you moping around already, eh?”, Sophia yelled from the driver’s seat of the car that had just pulled up in front of Charlotte. “You were supposed to pick me up 10 minutes ago!” “Calm down, how about thanking Lisa for that.”, she gave the girl in the passenger seat a nod. “Couldn’t decide what dress to wear on her third date.” “Right, would you mind setting off before someone sees us?”, Charlotte snarked as she climbed in the back of the Cadillac. “Wasn’t it clear from the outset that you’d pick a black dress?”, she rested her chin on the passenger’s seatback and smiled at Lisa. “Yeah but this one is new. It has this nice v-neckline.”, she said while looking down ate herself, slowly putting her red-brown hair to one side, brushing through it with her fingers. “Black does suit your hair colour well. I’m sure Lou’s gonna love it! … So, how long does their concert last?” “Probably about 90 minutes, plus encore of course.”, Sophia said and watched Charlotte in the rear-vision mirror dropping back into her seat. “Jeeez!” “Now that’s not fair! You’ve listened to them records and said you like ‘em!”, Sophia whined. “I do, I do! I’m just… If my parents find out I’m at some Rhythm & Blues concert they will kill me, slowly and very painfully.” “Relax girl, our little lie will work out just perfect. And besides Jake and Lou have invited us for drinks in that cozy, neighbouring bar afterwards.”

The the girls drove about another 20 minutes until they reached the “Kingston Mines”, an event location for live music on the city’s North Side. After parking the car, they went to the venue’s backdoor. “We’re with the band!”, Sophia told the security guy self-assuring, who looked down at the girls. “You don’t say, huh?.” The girl tried to push the man aside “Jake? .. Jakey? Would you give us a hand here…?” After a moment a man dressed in a black suit, black hat and dark sunglasses showed up. “Babe, what’s the problem? .. Oh yeah, it’s alright, they’re with me.”, he explained and let the girls in. “Hi handsome.” Sophia sniggered and gave her man a kiss. “Aah I’ve missed you hun, you look beautiful tonight!” And he pulled her into a deep kiss while holding her in his strong arms. When they both let off of one another to catch their breath, the dark haired girl carefully tugged at his glasses. “I wanna see your eyes.” “Later honey, when it’s just the two of-“ Charlotte cleared her throat. Both gave her an irritated look and raised one brow. Gosh, they’re so cute together. And Charlotte needed to force herself not to giggle. “I got you girls the best seats of the house.” He gave his girl a soft stroke through her hair. “I will see you later.” When the band got up on stage, taking their positions, Lisa couldn’t help it but waved at Lou excitedly and he gave her a flustered smile. Their show opener was ‘I Can’t Turn You Loose” with Jake and Elwood doing their grand entry. Charlotte had listened to a few of their records but never seen them performing live. Sure, she had met Jake and Lou before, picking up or dropping off her friends but she had never met the entire band. He let her gaze wonder from the left stage til the right, taking a good look at Steve and Murphy. Steve’s a real looker, if his hair wasn’t longer than mine. And Murph’s shirt is so tight around his muscular arms they must have sewed him into that shirt. And then the horn section caught her eye, a certain trumpet player to be precise. He had dark, slightly wavy hair, approximately her size, medium build, sideburns, he was wearing dark sunglasses like everyone else, a black leather vest and Damn those lights are way too gloomy to take a proper look at him. But his sound was brilliant. Clear and straight forward. The horn section was without any doubt the backbone of the band while making sure of that groovy sound.

Next songs coming up were “Hey Bartender” with an incredible solo on the harmonica by Elwood, “Messin With The Kid”, “I Don’t Know” and “Shot Gun Blues”. Especially Sophia liked the last two. And watching Jake perform Charlotte could really see why she did. By now it held no one. Everyone in the crowd was dancing, singing, jumping up and down and vibing along. Right after “Almost” Jake introduced the horn section to the crowd, with Tom Bones Malone on trombone, Blue Lou Marini on sax and Mr. Fabulous Alan Rubin on trumpet. Charlotte’s heart stopped for second when the spotlight panned over to him. He bowed slightly and greeted the audience with a smile. When he was playing he seemed so confident but his smile was humble and full of warmness. Of course her reaction didn’t stay unnoticed by her friends.

The rest of the concert went by real fast, much to the girl’s dislike. And Charlotte couldn’t remember the last time she had such a blasting time. After at least 3 or 4 encores the band disappeared from the stage and Sophia lead the girls to the backstage area. As soon as her eyes saw Lou, Lisa went over to him with big steps. “Hey Lou.”, she greeted him excitedly. His jaw dropped, when he looked up from his instrument case, taking in her appearance fully. His eyes lingered on her décolleté, causing him to swallow. “You look stunning tonight, darling” He grabbed his girl by the hips, pulling her close and gave her soft kiss. Her red lipstick let a stain on his lips, which she quickly swiped off using her thumb. He whispered something into her ear, causing her to giggle, before he left to help up picking up the band’s gear.

“There you are, did you enjoy the concert?”, Elwood asked, approaching the group of girls. “Of course we did! It was amazing, thanks again.”, Lisa and Sophia gave him a hug. “Oh by the way, this is our friend Charlotte.” “Hi, Elwood, nice to meet you.”, she gave him a quick wave. “Likewise, so have you met the rest of the band yet?” “Nope, didn’t got a chance so far.” “But she would love to!”, Sophia interrupted her and gave Lisa a cheeky grin. “She’s very keen on meeting Mr.Fabulous, you know.” Charlotte shot her a dirty look. “Sure, no problem.” Elwood assured. “Hey Alan, come on over, would ya?” It took the horn player a moment to realise who was calling for him but as soon as he did, he quickly walked towards the four. His gaze instantly landed on a young woman, he had never seen her before. She was about his size with curly, shoulder length, blonde hair. That’s all he was able to notice in that moment, his eyes trapped in her beautiful smile. “I’m sure you remember Jake’s and Lou’s girls… and this is their friend-” “Hi, my name’s Charlotte.” “It’s a pleasure to meet you, I’m Alan. Is this your first concert?” “Right, it is. These two enthused over you guys so much, I felt the need to experience you at first hand.” “And..?” “Oh it was great… really! I feel almost sorry for myself I didn’t catch any of your previous shows.” “I’m looking forward seeing you on the next concerts then , don’t disappoint me.”, he smiled. Oh that smile again. “Rubin! Stop flirting and give us a hand, would ya?”, Steve shouted. He politely excused himself and she watched him walking over to “The Colonel” and Willie, helping them to get all their equipment together. “I wasn’t flirting.”, he hissed at the guitar player, turning his head to the girls, making sure they wouldn’t be able to hear him. “Tsk, no of course not, You never are.” “What’s that supposed to mean?” “C’mon, Rubin, we all know how popular you are with the ladies.” “Speakin of ladies,”, Willie put in his two pennies worth, “You’re still seeing this Lari?” “Don’t think this is any of your business.”, the trumpet replied in an irritated tone.

Charlotte turned to her friends eventually. “Would you stop embarrassing me tonight?” “I think you’re pretty good at doing that by yourself, aren’t you?” Lisa and Sophia laughed. “It was great, REALLY!”, Sophia mimicked Charlotte. “You’re usually so well-spoken and witty.” “Look, I dunno what he’s doing to me. I can’t hear myself think!-“ She suddenly stopped when Jake, Elwood, Matt, Duck and Alan joined the group, still waiting for the other guys to get ready. “Are you girls gonna join us for a nightcap?”, Matt asked curiously. “We sure are.” Lisa declared when Lou hugged her from behind, planting a soft peck on her cheek. Charlotte desperately wanted to give Mr.Fabulous a closer look but she could feel his eyes on her and didn’t want to create any awkward eye contact, so she was happy when they finally started out for that bar.

#Alan Rubin #Alan Rubin x fem!Reader #Blues Brothers #Blues Brothers fandom #Blues Brothers fanfiction #Mr. Fabulous #Elwood Blues #Jake Blues #Blue Lou Marini #Tom Bones Malone #Willie Too Big Hall #Steve Cropper #Matt Guitar Murphy #Donald Dunn

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tonystarkbingo · 3 years

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TSB MIV Week 26 Roundup!

IT’S THE LAST ONE, Y’ALL! And there are so many amazing fills that came flooding in this past week! We’re in the process of getting badges made and sent, so please be patient with us.

We are taking the rest of the month off, but in May and June we will be doing month-long flash bingos! We’ll keep you posted about those, and in the meantime go give some love to these wonderful content creators!

Title: Double the Pleasure, Double the Fun Collaborator: Politzania Card Number: 4007 Link: AO3 Square Filled: Adopted: KINK: Threesome Ship: WinterIron Rating: Mature Major Tags: dimensional shenanigans, fluff, fade to black smut Summary: Thanks to some multiverse experimentation, Bucky now has two genius billionaire boyfriends (and their libidos) to deal with. Word Count: 717

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Title: A Good Date and a Bad Idea Collaborator: gottalovev Card Number: 4077 Link: AO3 Squares Filled: Chapter 1, R5 - Winteriron Chapter 2, A4 - Justin Hammer Ship: WinterIron Rating: Teen Major Tags: Attempted kidnapping Summary: Chapter 1: Tony is on what he hopes is a first date with Bucky. He didn't expect it to be so rudely interrupted. (Tony POV) Chapter 2: Justin has waited for his moment, and this is it. (Same events, Justin Hammer's POV) Word Count: 7918

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Title: Adjust The Pecking Order Collaborator: camichats Card Number: 4049 Link: AO3 Square Filled: R5 - AU: western Ship: Clint Barton/Laura Barton/Tony Stark Rating: Teen Major Tags: polyamory Summary: Tony knew that he wasn't the most adjusted man in the world, but there was something hot about a woman in a pretty floral dress confidently pointing a shotgun at him. There was nothing wrong liking a woman with a gun. The messed up part was where she was surely Laura, Clint's wife. He shouldn't be eyeing his friend's wife, no matter how sure her hands were on that gun. "You with the bank?" she asked. "No, ma'am," he said. Since his hands were already up by his head, he took his hat off, tipped it in her direction, then put it back on. "Name's Tony Stark. I believe your husband sent for me?" Word Count: 1211

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Title: Finals Collaborator: hereandnowwearealive Card Number: 4085 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: R4 - James Rhodes/War Machine Ship: Gen Rating: IronHusbands Major Tags: art Summary: An image of Tony and Rhodey studying for finals, long overdue for a break

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Title: Something like fate Collaborator: Gottalovev Card Number: 4077 Link: AO3 Square Filled: Adopted - Sent to a Different Dimension Ship: Stony Rating: Teen Major Tags: Universe hopping, getting together, CW fix-it but no discourse Summary: Tony and Steve go alternate-reality hopping by accident (Fine. It's Tony's fault: he touched something he shouldn't have in Reed Richard's lab). It's an eye opening experience. Word Count: 8411

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Title: DtP —> DtF - Chapter 1 Collaborator: Politzania Card Number: 4007 Link: AO3 Square Filled: A3 - free space Ship: WinterIron Rating: Explicit Major Tags: dimensional shenanigans, eventual smut, threesome, selfcest, oral sex, anal sex, Tony POV, First Person POV, Present Tense Summary: Thanks to a bit of dimensional travel, Tony takes the chance to find out if he really is as good a lover as his Bucky says (as well as get another Bucky’s opinion on the matter).. Word Count: 681

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Title: The Courtship of Death Collaborator: MagicaDraconia16 Card Number: 4019 Link: AO3 Square Filled: K2 - Tony Stark/Loki Ship: FrostIron Rating: Teen Major Tags: Crack treated seriously, AU canon divergence, courtship and rejection thereof, canonical character death, BAMF Hela Summary: ...goes a lot easier when you do some research first. Otherwise entitled: "Why Torturing, Brainwashing And Murdering The Father Of The Person You're Trying To Court Is A Bad Idea" (trade mark pending, by Tony Stark) Word Count: 2351

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Title: Things Develop (in the Darkroom) Collaborator: 27dragons Card Number: 4027 Link: AO3 Square Filled: R4 - Photoshoot Ship: WinterIron Rating: Teen Major Tags: AU: No powers, photoshoot, photographer!Bucky, lingerie, budoir photoshoot, oblivious!Bucky Summary: Bucky was happy to agree to a private photoshoot with his favorite client... at least, until he realized what kind of photoshoot Tony wanted. Word Count: 775

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Title: The Heartbreaker Collaborator: fightingforcreativity Card Number: 4004 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: R2 - Au: Hydra won Ship: none Rating: Teen Major Tags: AU: Hydra won, Hydra Iron Man, Angst, Mark 17 (Heartbreaker) Summary: Red Skulls voice resonated from everywhere, “Oh might I have the honour of introducing you to Hydra’s newest and strongest agent? Say hello to ‘Heartbreaker’. I’m sure you’ll find the name befitting.” And just like that, the Avengers came face to face with the one man they had hoped to free, wearing an armour they’ve never seen before. “Tony?”, Rhodey’s voice was broken, just as his heart and he could bet everything he had, the other’s weren’t faring better. “Been a while, Rhodes. Nice of seeing you all again, sadly you can’t stay for the party~” replied Tony, voice cold and devoid of emotion.

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Title: Family Date Night Collaborator: JehBeeEh Card Number: 4058 Link: AO3 Square Filled: A1 - Drive-In Ship: Stony, Superfamily Rating: Gen Major Tags: fluff Summary: Date night plans get changed at the last minute. Word Count: 714

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Title: The Supplicant Collaborator: 27dragons Card Number: 4027 Link: AO3 Square Filled: R1 - AU: Royalty Ship: WinterIron Rating: Teen Major Tags: AU: historical/fantasy, warlord Tony, tribute Bucky Summary: Bucky wondered, sometimes, if King Alexander had not intended Bucky to stand at the throne’s right hand as the kingdom’s general, or at its left hand as chief counselor, why the king had even bothered to sire another child after his first had proven hale and of sound mind. He rather suspected that the king, too, wondered that same thing. But as it turned out, there was a reason for the king to have sired a second child: to be given as tribute to the terrifying warlord threatening the entire kingdom. Word Count: 2966

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Title: They didn't cover this in the Academy - Chapter 1 Collaborator: camichats Card Number: 4049 Link: AO3 Square Filled: T2- “Damn it, Stark!” Ship: Gamora/Tony Rating: Teen Major Tags: Alternate Universe - Star Trek Fusion, marriage of convenience Summary: Tony might be a pain in his captain's ass, but he never goes out of his way to make problems for her. And really, how was he supposed to know that the engineer he spent all last night talking to was a princess? Gamora wants to get off planet, and Tony is willing to help. While heading back towards Federation space, they pick up a distress call from inside Romulan space. Word Count: 10,206

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Title: Anything for you Collaborator: Gottalovev Card Number: 4077 Link: AO3 Square Filled: S3 - Pining Ship: Steve Rogers/Natasha Stark (universe 3490) Rating: Explicit Major Tags: Getting together, porn with feelings Summary: Steve has one certainty: he has a crush of epic proportion on Natasha Stark, and it's becoming quite a problem. Word Count: 4083

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Title: The Futurist Collaborator: periwinklepromise Card Number: 4053 Link: AO3 Square Filled: T2 - Edwin Jarvis Ship: Tony & Edwin Jarvis Rating: Gen Major Tags: Implied Child Abuse, drabble Summary: Perhaps it is time to look to the future. Word Count: 100

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Title: untitled Collaborator: chel Card Number: 4011 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: Adopted - Wrong Number/Booty Call Ship: IronHusbands Rating: Gen Major Tags: None Summary: Moodboard-ish Word Count: N/A

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Title: Takin’ What They’re Givin’ (‘Cause I’m Workin’ for a Livin’) - Chapter 2 Collaborator: PoliZ Card Number: 4007 Link: AO3 Square Filled: K3 - Kink: Sex Compulsion Ship: Stucky Rating: Explicit Major Tags: Phone Sex, Identity Porn, Anal Fingering, Dildo Play Summary: Bucky's little camboy sidegig - where he plays 'Special Agent Jay' -- gets him attention from an unexpected quarter. Chapter 2: Bucky's one on one chat with BrooklynBorn heads in a very different direction than he expected; offering instruction and support as well as release. Can he keep his emotions in check? Word Count: 3912

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Title: Save My Soul, Spare My Heart Collaborator: summerpipedream Card Number: 4045 Link: AO3 Square Filled: A3 - Free Space Ship: Pre-Stuckony Rating: Teen Major Tags: Angels and Demons Summary: “Are you hurt?” “The jury’s still out on that. Who exactly are you and why the hell are you in my apartment?” An angel and a demon walk into Tony’s apartment. Supposedly, both of them were tasked to protect him. Whether Tony can survive their bickering is another question entirely. Word Count: 2242

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Title: The Perfect Solution Collaborator: Fighting_for_Creativity Card Number: 4004 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: T4 - Kink: Cuckolding Ship: IronHusbands, Rhodey/Carol Rating: Mature Major Tags: AceTony, bisexual Rhodey, friends with benefits, Carol knows what she wants, caring boyfriend Rhodey Summary: Tony never really enjoyed himself during the more intimate moments in bed. Naturally Rhodey had figured him out and after meeting Carol the perfect solution came to be. Word Count: 482

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Title: Time Loopy Doopy (Fake News already in 2009 Collaborator: Fighting_for_Creativity Card Number: 4004 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: S5 - Paparazzi Ship: (Hinted) WinterIron Rating: M Major Tags: timeline- what timeline?, Avengers, Kid bucky(?), fake news, time trouble Summary: Despite what the News tweet says, Tony and the Avengers all knew the truth and that was Tony trying to protect his current boyfriend’s kid self from the past. Now he just needed to find a way back into his own time with his own Avengers. Word Count: N/A

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Title: My Darling, you are my poetry Collaborator: Sagana Rojana Olt Card Number: 4046 Link: AO3 Square Filled: T4 - AU: Artist/Muse Ship: WinterIron Rating: Explicit Major Tags: NSFW art, nude modelling Summary: Bucky absolutely didn't plan to go to art classes, but his therapist insisted. So here he was creating nude art of the young Stark heir, while blushing furiously. Word Count: N/A

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Title: This light that I hold, speaks to you Collaborator: Sagana Rojana Olt Card Number: 4046 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: R1 - Kink: Candles Ship: WinterIron Rating: Mature Major Tags: Candles Summary: A quiet night spent together, playing with supersoldier senses. Word Count: N/A

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Title: The Wrong Dress Collaborator: cami-chats Card Number: 4049 Link: AO3 Square Filled: T1 - Kink: Interfemoral/Intercrural Ship: IronWidow Rating: Teen Major Tags: None Summary: Natasha's dress might not be good for events, but that doesn't mean she looks bad in it. Word Count: 933

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Title: They didn’t cover this in the Academy - Chapter 2 Collaborator: cami-chats Card Number: 4049 Link: AO3 Square Filled: T3 - Kink: Messy/Dirty Ship: Gamora/Tony Stark Rating: Teen Major Tags: Major Character Injury (not fatal) Summary: Lieutenant Commander Tony Stark of Eden and the continuing adventures of having a ship that’s falling apart around him. Word Count: 7385

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Title: Nighttime Shadows Collaborator: Khentkawes Card Number: 4091 Link: AO3 Square Filled: S3 - Pepper Potts/Rescue Ship: Pepperony Rating: Gen Major Tags: vague discussion of PTSD (very vague), emotional hurt/comfort, nightmares, angst and fluff, Tony Stark/Pepper Potts Summary: Tony’s nightmares never fully went away. But over the years, Pepper likes to think she’s gotten better at helping him cope with them. She doesn’t always have the right words to say, but she can at least be there for him. And usually, that’s enough. Word Count: 1555

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Title: Status: Iron Man dead/Tony Stark alive (it’s complicated) Collaborator: Khentkawes Card Number: 4091 Link: AO3 Square Filled: A3 - Free Ship: Pepperony Rating: Gen Major Tags: discussions of possible death/funerals, Endgame Fixit, funeral, fake funeral, Tony Stark/Pepper Potts, Canon divergence Summary: The Avengers ‘accidentally’ fake Tony Stark’s death. And Tony finds it hilarious. Word Count: 4749

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Title: Spin Me Out Collaborator: 27dragons Card Number: 4027 Link: AO3 Square Filled: K2 - AU: Sci-Fi/Futuristic Ship: WinterIron Rating: G Major Tags: AU: Sci-Fi, space opera Summary: Tony keeps his head down, working on the ships that come through the station, trading on the grey market, listening to the gossip, and quietly planning to reclaim the technology that was stolen from him years ago. His chance may finally have arrived, but is immediately complicated by Winter, an impossible fugitive from a galactic empire that controls its people with forbidden Old Tech. Word Count: 1391

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Title: Secret Identities and Super-dads Collaborator: Khentkawes Card Number: 4091 Link: AO3 Square Filled: A2 - Futurefic Ship: Pepperony Rating: Teen Major Tags: Minor violence, post-Avengers Endgame, not Avengers Endgame Compliant, BAMF Tony, BAMF Pepper, Rescue!Pepper, not-dead Tony Stark, Morgan Stark, family, attempted kidnapping Summary: When armed men attack an elementary school in New York, attempting to kidnap eight-year-old Morgan Stark, no one expects that “Roger the chauffeur” will be the one to take out the bad guys—with some backup from Morgan Stark herself and a very pissed off Pepper Potts. The public have believed Tony was dead for the past four years, and Tony never expected his big secret would get out like this. He didn’t mean to blow his cover as “Roger the chauffeur.” But when people try to mess with his family, they get what’s coming to them. Word Count: 6104

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Title: Celebration Collaborator: Ducky Card Number: 4013 Link: AO3 Square Filled: S1 - Victorious Ship: IronFalcon Rating: Gen Major Tags: Paintball, First Dates, Fluff Summary: After a victorious paintball exercise, Tony and Sam celebrate on their first date Word Count: 835

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Title: A Look Into the Mind Collaborator: Ducky Card Number: 4013 Link: AO3 Square Filled: S3 - Sent to a Different Dimension Ship: ThunderIron, one-sided Amora/Thor Rating: Teen Major Tags: Alternate Dimension Summary: Thor and Tony are sent to the Enchantress’s consciousness. Word Count: 323

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Title: The Stars May Not Accept Us Collaborator: PoliZ Card Number: 4007 Link: AO3 Square Filled: S1 - Hot Water Ship: WinterIron Rating: Teen Major Tags: Non-Powered AU, Space AU, amputee!Bucky, fade to black smut, Summary: People come and people go -- that’s the way a spaceport works. Especially one out on the edge of known space; some stay a few hours, some a few years, but everyone moves on eventually. Bucky knew that going in, but he fell hard anyways. Word Count: 2790

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Title: Visions, Not Reality Collaborator: JehBeeEh Card Number: 4058 Link: AO3 Square Filled: K2 - Nick Fury Ship: Stony Rating: Teen Major Tags: None Summary: Tony's conversation with Fury at Barton's Farm leaves him second guessing his relationship with Steve - which no one was supposed to know about. Word Count: 1915

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Title: What, Like It’s Hard Collaborator: JehBeeEh Card Number: 4058 Link: AO3 Square Filled: S1 - Movie Retelling Ship: Stony Rating: M Major Tags: Omegaverse, Asshole Ty Stone, Even more of an asshole Stane (in future chapters) Summary: Omega Tony Stark has it all, until his alpha boyfriend breaks his heart. In an effort to win him back, he follows the alpha of his dreams to Harvard Law School, where he discovers there might be more to being the first omega at the prestigious school. He also meets another alpha that might just make him forget the one he drove across the country for. Word Count: 1629

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Title: You Should Date My Boyfriend Collaborator: JehBeeEh Card Number: 4058 Link: AO3 Square Filled: Adopted - Sharon Carter/Agent 13 Ship: Stony, Sharon/Steve Rating: Teen Major Tags: None Summary: Sharon makes sure Tony knows her boyfriend might be interested in someone else. Word Count: 1090

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Title: Heart jewel Collaborator: Sagana Rojana Olt Card Number: 4046 Link: AO3 Square Filled: S3 - Sucker Bet Ship: None Rating: Gen Major Tags: Magical Jewels, Ravens Summary: Loosely based on the Cornelius Sigan episode of BBC Merlin. Word Count: 100

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Title: The Persistence of Memory Collaborator: Sagana Rojana Olt Card Number: 4046 Link: AO3 Square Filled: T3 - Art Format: Cubist/Surreal Ship: none, implied past Stony Rating: Gen Major Tags: Reincarnation, Grief Summary: Stephen Grant, art student and docent at the Smithsonian is doing the last of his rounds, when he meets a wealthy gentleman who looks very familiar. Word Count: 300

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Title: Would Robot Eyes Rust if They Cried? - Chapter 6 Collaborator: JacarandaBanyan Card Number: 4064 Link: AO3 Square Filled: A3 - Free Ship: Stuckony Rating: E Major Tags: Established Relationship, Sexual Content, Angst, Robot Bodies Summary: Steve tries again with Tony. It doesn't go a whole lot better. Word Count: 2376

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Title: What, Like It’s Hard? Collaborator: JehBeeEh Card Number: 4058 Link: AO3 Square Filled: S2 - Evil Exes S4 - First Kiss Ship: Stony Rating: M Major Tags: Omegaverse, Asshole Ty Stone, Even more of an asshole Stane (in future chapters) Summary: Omega Tony Stark has it all, until his alpha boyfriend breaks his heart. In an effort to win him back, he follows the alpha of his dreams to Harvard Law School, where he discovers there might be more to being the first omega at the prestigious school. He also meets another alpha that might just make him forget the one he drove across the country for. Word Count: 20,611

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Title: Short Drabbles - Chapter 5: Hand holding Collaborator: Card Number: 4046 Link: AO3 Square Filled: K1 - Holding hands Ship: WinterIron Rating: Gen Major Tags: summer heat Summary: Tony enjoys the metal arm keeping it's cool at all times. Word Count: 100

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Title: Daisies on Your Nightstand Collaborator: raslbecket Card Number: 4056 Link: AO3 Square Filled: T2 - showoff Ship: Stony Rating: Mature Major Tags: Rough sex, exhibitionism, choking Summary: Tony Stark's exhibitionist streak rears its head when he's in the middle of rearranging Steve Rogers' guts. Word Count: 1462

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Title: The Eye Of A Spy - Chapter 2: Interlude - How Everything Began Collaborator: Fighting_for_Creativity Card Number: 4004 Link: AO3 Square Filled: A3 - free space Ship: IronFury Rating: Mature Major Tags: IronFury, movie retelling, MIT Era, Mostly Fury Pov Summary: Fury gets his mission. Word Count: 869

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Title: A Fairytale, This Is Not - Chapter 2: All Pieces But No Solved Puzzle Collaborator: Fighting_for_Creativity Card Number: 4004 Link: AO3 Square Filled: K1 - shared trauma Ship: WinterIron, Merlin/Arthur, Merlin/Morgana, Merlin/Gwaine Rating: Mature Major Tags: Reincarnation, dreams, visions, canon typical violence, ok Howard, kidnapping, (HYDRA in later chapters), team as family, trauma Summary: Tony makes some friends, is being betrayed, and keeps dreaming of a man named Merlin, who apparently has magic and that fact isn't known to his friends until he tells the black-haired woman about it. Somehow everything works out ok for them all though. Word Count: 3584

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Title: Five Tuesdays and a Wednesday Collaborator: LBibliophile Card Number: 4090 Link: AO3 Square Filled: Adopted - Fortune Telling Ship: WinterIron Rating: Gen Major Tags: Time Loop, Groundhog Day, Coffee Addict Tony Stark, 5+1 Things Summary: Bucky is stuck in a Groundhog Day loop. He has many things to achieve, to make right, to try and end the loop - but top of his list is saving Tony from the dreadful fate of terrible morning coffee. Tony appreciates his efforts. Word Count: 2820

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Title: body getting tense (nothing like the others) Collaborator: starksnack Card Number: 4073 Link: AO3 Square Filled: K5 - Dressing Room Ship: Stony Rating: Explicit Major Tags: None Summary: Steve and Tony steal a quick moment in their dressing room before their next shoot. Word Count: 1000

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Title: Half of Love’s Duet Collaborator: ralsbecket Card Number: 4056 Link: AO3 Square Filled: T1 - Height Difference Ship: Stuckony Rating: Explicit Major Tags: Threesome, Age Difference, Art Summary: A glimpse of college student Tony and his married professors, Steve and Bucky. Word Count: N/A

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Title: Clint Gets A (New) Job Collaborator: celtic Card Number: 4035 Link: AO3 Square Filled : T1 - Occupational Hazard Ship: Tony Stark & Clint Barton & Bucky Barnes Rating: Gen Major Tags: Modern Day AU, No Superpowers, Mild Angst, Canon Character Death Summary: Stane Industries has taken over Trickshot Incorporated, which means Clint is out of a job. Until he meets a third player, the man who will build Stark Enterprises with what remains of his father’s legacy. Word Count: 4236

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Title: Girl’s Night Collaborator: celtic Card Number: 4035 Link: AO3 Square Filled: S2 - Darcy Lewis Ship: Pepperony Rating: Gen Major Tags: None Summary: Tony and Pepper need a babysitter for Morgan for date night. Word Count: 1635

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Title: Double, Double, Toil and Trouble, Evil Clones Are Such a Struggle - Chapter 2 Collaborator: Cinna Card Number: 4060 Link: AO3 Square Filled: A3 - Free Ship: Tony/Bucky/Winter Rating: Teen Major Tags: Selfcest (Bucky/Winter) Summary: When taking down a Hydra base, you should probably avoid touching anything weird-looking and potentially magical. (Or, Bucky and Winter both have the hots for Tony, and a newly-embodied Winter decides to finally do something about it.) Word Count: 2695

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Title: No Pets Allowed - Chapter 4 Collaborator: Cinna Card Number: 4060 Link: AO3 Square Filled: R4 - Team Bonding Ship: background Pepperony Rating: Gen Major Tags: Minor warning for non-graphic mention of off-screen animal death. Summary: Tony Stark is not a cat person. (this is a lie.) Word Count: 894

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Title: Trouble with a Capital T (And That Stands for “Tiny”) Collaborator: Cinna Card Number: 4060 Link: AO3 Square Filled: T2 - Precognition K5 - Deaged (Tony) Ship: background Pepperony Rating: Gen Major Tags: featuring Actual Good Dad Howard (not really a warning, but you should probably be aware or you might be confused ) Summary: Tony gets de-aged by magical fuckery, and five-year-old Tony and gets to meet his future self, in AI form. AI Tony thinks this is a hoot. Everyone else is less convinced. Word Count: 19082

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Title: Six Months Earlier - Chapter 7 Collaborator: Cinna Card Number: 4060 Link: AO3 Square Filled: S1 - Canon: Armoured Adventures Ship: None Rating: Gen Major Tags: Grief, Medical Trauma Summary: Tony recovers from the plane crash that damaged his heart and took his father from him, and struggles to come to terms with the aftermath. Word Count: 1044

#tonystarkbingomarkiv #tsbmiv #tsb miv weekly roundup #tsb miv week 26

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florenceandthemachine · 4 years

Note

okay but jackson falling for single dad stiles (◕‿◕✿)

SO (and I feel like I’m going to be saying this a lot) HERES THE THING.

@jacksonstilinskis, as you can assume, the first time they meet is a fucking disaster.

It’s a disaster because Stiles moved to New York for his bachelor degree, partially in an attempt to chase the highest scholarship he was awarded and partially in an attempt to get the fuck out of Beacon Hills, the place that killed his mother, his father, and his best friend — and the place that left him with a squirming three month old less than a year after he graduates high school, a gift from the recently departed.

He gets a major in Criminology and a minors in Mythological Studies, rocks the single father gig, and manages to teach Claudia (Scotts idea, Stiles had cried when he found out) what is okay to bite and what is not okay to bite, but getting into grad school is a whole other animal.

It’s a disaster because Stiles decides to forgo taking out a mortgage in student loans and tries to save up for his masters program by joining up with the NYPD. They have amazing benefits, amazing child support, and a legal team that could kick anyones ass.

It’s a disaster because six years later, when Stiles and Jackson first meet, Stiles is in uniform (a uniform he looks damn good in, Jackson begrudgingly acknowledges) and Jackson’s Porsche just hit about 87 miles per hour in a 55.

The best part is (well, the best part if you ask Stiles — the worst part if you ask Jackson) is that Jackson has been pulled over hundreds of times before, and he always — always — gets out of it with a smile and a laugh and an apology, and Stiles could not give less of a fuck. Jackson breaks out all the tricks. The smile, the pout, the puppy eyes. He actually thinks it works for a second — Stiles is smiling back at him, and Jackson isn’t above tilting his head to get a better look at the way the uniform hugs him, but then Stiles is asking for his registration and insurance and Jackson’s smile falls into a scowl.

Finally, he brings out the big guns — he casually gestures to his scrubs, mentions he’s on his way to a surgery, because being top of his class at Harvard Medical had to count for something — and he really was in a rush, officer, he had to get to the patient right away.

Stiles has the audacity to roll his eyes and laugh as he hands Jackson his ticket, and Jackson has to pretend that the sound didn’t make a shiver dance over his skin. “Well, I certainly hope you take more time and care with your patient then you do on your commute. Have a better day.”

The cruiser follows him all the way to the hospital, and Jackson feels a moment of petty anger before he realizes that the 23rd Precinct is basically right across Park Avenue from Mount Sinai Hospital. If he looks out the window of his office, he can see a steady stream of police cars going in and out of the underground garage.

Huh.

—

Jackson allowed himself a full week to whine to everyone who would listen about his ticket after he plea bargained it down, but then even he got tired of sulking —

(“I am not sulking, Laura.”

“It was over a month ago. You are absolutely sulking, you baby.”)

— sulking over who he had only thought of as Officer Asshole. Who the fuck gives a speeding ticket to a doctor, a doctor that was on his way to surgery?

Not that Jackson had actually been on his way to surgery. He was never in a rush to surgery, because he was never late to surgery, because he barely left the hospital on his days off, let alone a day he had a surgery scheduled.

Either way, that was months ago, and even Jackson couldn’t hold a grudge that long. He was in rotation today — Mount Sinai may have been one of the best hospitals in the nation, but it was first and foremost a children's hospital, and being in rotation — and seeing the people that they were helping, the kids they were helping, really helped bring that home to everyone.

He grabbed the next clipboard off of a stack and pushed open the door to the waiting room, taking count of all the parents and kids waiting for everything from a bruised knee (helecoptor parents) to any number of fakers (midterm season was rough on everyone).

“Claudia and Stiles... Stilinski?”

What the hell was a Stiles?

Jackson only had half a moment to think about it before a dark head popped up, a child that couldn’t have been more than six in his arms, and Jackson almost felt resentful when he realized that he was staring at Officer Asshole again. And Officer Asshole had a kid, who looked absolutely miserable, and Officer Asshole looked miserable in proxy to his kid, and Jackson really needed to start thinking of him as a “Stiles” before he accidentally called him officer Asshole out loud.

Jackson guided them back to an exam room full of stuffed toys and bright colors on the wall, letting Stiles take his time setting Claudia down on the bench before sitting right beside her. He introduced himself and smiled down to Claudia — who had a low fever and was squirming uncomfortably, rubbing her little hands against her flushed cheeks, and Jackson would never think that was not cute. Even a sick kid was a cute kid, and though this kid was sick...

“...it’s nothing to be worried about. Kids get sick all the time, and it sucks, but it happens.” Jackson said, using his full soothing doctor voice on Stiles, who looked at the same time utterly relieved and totally embarrassed.

He confirmed as much as he stood up, taking a prescription from Jackson for some children's medicine to help bring Claudia’s fever down, shaking his head slowly. “Sorry. It was probably overkill to bring her to a hospital, but I’m still pretty new to this parenting thing. I just... I don’t know, I have a tendency to assume the worst, after... well. I just do.”

Jackson almost laughs again, shaking his head. “Don’t ever apologize for advocating for your kid. It’s the best thing you can do, next to pulling over innocent doctors who definitely aren't speeding.” He reaches out to shake Stiles hand, dazzling smile on his face, and Stiles’ blooms into recognition.

“You’re the doctor! The doctor I pulled over. Sorry, I forget names and faces, but I could never forget that smile.” Stiles said, a grin on his own face, shaking Jackson’s hand for a few seconds before his eyes widened in horror, yanking his hand back. “Oh god. That sounded so creepy, I’m so sorry, she’s kept me up for three days straight. I didn’t mean it in a weird way. I just—uh, I have to go. Thank you again! Please don’t think I'm some freak in a uniform!” he says, almost tripping over a nurse as he backs out of the room.

Jackson is grinning even wider, a real smile splitting his face, and he can’t help but call after him. “The coffee cart on 102nd is great for long nights. Favorite for all on call doctors and most of the boys in blue.”

Stiles smiles weakly and gives a thumbs up, disappearing down the stairway.

Officer Asshole — Stilinski, he reminded himself — wasn’t just hot, he was actually kind of cute. He was a cute dad.

Jackson was kind of fucked.

—

Jackson is sitting on a bench on 102nd Avenue, looking up at the dark night sky, when a danish lands in his lap. Jackson just looks at it for a minute — he’s just finishing up a thirty hour shift, and he’s only vaguely sure what’s real anymore — before he looks up, staring dumbly at the cup of coffee extended to him.

“It’s uh, a peace offering. And an apology? I mean, I’m not sorry for writing you a ticket. You were speeding. But I am sorry for calling you Doctor Dickbag for like a week afterward. But that medicine you gave me had Claudia back to her giggly self in no time, so I think you’re even. With yourself.”

It’s Stilinski, and judging by his pressed uniform, styled hair, and bright (if not nervous) smile, he’s just getting on shift while Jackson is mentally checking out of his own.

As soon as he puts two and two together, Jackson gratefully takes the cup and takes a too long swig of what tastes like frothy sugar milk, almost gagging as he looks at Stiles like he had been poisoned. “What the hell is this, a hot milkshake? Oh god, I should have known you were the type who drinks hot sugar, not coffee.”

Stiles has the audacity to laugh as he sits beside Jackson, and the two of them fall into easy, if shallow, conversation. They talk about work, and themselves, and soon Stiles is checking his watch with an apology, because his shift starts at 4 and he has to get into the precinct.

Jackson watches as he stands up and puts on his fancy police hat, and later, he’ll blame it on sleep deprivation, but he calls out after Stiles’ retreating form.

“So, coffee and a danish, maybe breakfast next time? I’ll buy.”

Stiles stops and turns, looking Jackson over, and he grins as he nods his head, even if his cheeks are pink. “It’s a date.” He winks and turns back around, and Jackson actually feels goosebumps on the back of his neck.

Oh, Jackson was fucked. He flops back on the bench and smiles to himself, before frowning, whirling around to yell at Stiles’ retreating backside.

“Wait, what the fuck do you mean you were calling me Doctor Dickbag?!”

—

They manage to have several coffee / breakfast / here’s a meal dates, and Jackson is almost proud of their timing—Stiles kisses Jackson on date number two, a quick peck that leaves Jackson’s world on it’s edge as he grins at Stiles blushing backside as he speaks rapid fire into his radio, now buzzing with life. It’s cute on their first date, but gets old by their fourth date, they manage to kiss for almost twenty seconds in the ambulance bay at Mount Sinai before Jackson’s pager goes off. He groans and pulls away, glaring at the device as though it personally offended him, and Stiles laughs as he brings Jackson’s hands up to kiss Jackson’s knuckles.

“Go, go save lives. But, uh, if you were free on Thursday, I was thinking... maybe we could have our next date at my place? I’ve already got Mrs. Bobrowski on speed dial to babysit.” Stiles says, his tone confident even if he’s chewing his lip nervously. It’s a trick question — Stiles is off, and Stiles knows that Jackson is off, and Stiles already secured a babysitter, and Jackson can feel Stiles eyes dipping back from his lips to the low V of his scrub top, and Jackson wastes no time before agreeing wholeheartedly.

“It’s a date.” he murmurs against Stiles lips, squeezing his ass through the uniform, and Stiles squeaks in appreciation as he swats Jackson toward the hospital doors.

Thursday rolls around and Jackson puts on a tight pair of jeans, a button down shirt with far too many buttons undone to be decent, and adds just a drop of cologne to his pulse point. He looks good. He feels good. He buys flowers, for fucks sake, which means that of course when he knocks on Stiles door, Stiles is wearing a ratty tee shirt and sweats and has a pained look on his face.

“Jackson, I’m so sorry, Mrs. Bobrowski cancelled on me and I couldn’t get another sitter and I wanted to call you and tell you but I left my phone at the station and—”

Stiles looks miserable, and that’s all Jackson needs to know he’s telling the truth, that he truly is sorry, and that he’s going to tell Jackson “another time”, like having a kid involved would ruin a dinner date. Jackson takes a split second before shutting Stiles up with a kiss, brushing past him with a grand flourish as he says Claudia in the living room, bending down to give her first choice on Stiles flowers.

Stiles just stands in the doorway, stunned, looking as Jackson goes to the kitchen, Claudia skipping along happily behind him, excitedly waving her new purple flower in the air.

“Jackson, you don’t have to—”

“Stilinski, you have three seconds to shut up and tell me where to find a vase, and then tell me how I can help you with dinner.” Jackson says expectantly, and Stiles feels something warm curl around his chest.

—

They have dinosaur nuggets and carrots and peas for dinner, and Jackson loves it.

They watch a Disney movie and Jackson holds Stiles hand on the couch, and he loves it.

Stiles puts Claudia to bed and then turns to Jackson with such a hungry look in his eye, he can hardly blink before Stiles has him pulled into his bedroom, and fuck, Jackson loves it.

They barely get each other naked before they tumble into bed, and Stiles is rubbing against him so deliciously, and Jackson mouthes at his neck and bites at his pulse, and he would almost be ashamed of how quickly he comes, his body warm against Stiles, thrusting against his hips, but Stiles is right behind him, and they’re warm and sticky and have a mess on their abdomens.

Jackson just looks at Stiles in surprise, and they both stare a moment before they’re both laughing, desperately trying to stifle the sound so they don’t wake Claudia. Jackson wipes them clean with something on the floor (”that's my shirt, you ass!” Stiles basically squawks) and then they both lay there in bed, listening to the sounds of the city from the window, and Stiles starts to talk.

He tells them about his best friend Scott and his wife Allison that married right out of high school, and Allison who got pregnant before her first day at UCLA. He tells them about how after Claudia was born, they made Stiles the godparent, and then left Claudia in his care while they went on a much-delayed honeymoon to the coast, and then he tells them about how a little gas leak in the hotel robbed him of his two best friends and robbed Claudia of her parents.

He goes through it quickly — “what happened then sucks, but there’s no sense in wishing it was different” — but it brings him to his next point, lying with his head on Jackson’s chest, fingers tracing the lines across his stomach.

“Usually, guys run like hell when I say daughter. I’m a 26 year old cop with a 6 year old kid, and something about that is terrifying. Not that I think you’re going to be terrified, but—”

“Stiles, if this is the part of the show where you tell me that you and Claudia are a package deal, can it. I know. I’m not mad about it. Hell, I’ve already fooled you into thinking I’m more than just a dickwad, I’m not backing out now, I’ve put too much work into this.” Jackson snarks, and Stiles looks at him for a minute like he was crazy before he reads into Jackson’s facial expression, and his smile softens again.

“You’re still a dickwad. Doctor Dickwad.” Stiles says, playfully squeezing Jackson’s side. “But I guess I can keep you around as long as Claudia finds you useful.” he says with a dreamy sign, nosing along Jackson’s jawline once more.

Jackson just grins and turns to kiss him, taking a moment to realize—

he was so, so fucked.

#jackson whittemore #stiles stilinski #kidfic #teen wolf #stackson #officer stilinski #doctor whittemore #I love them #ask #flospeaks

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what-is-your-plan-today · 4 years

Text

Stark Spangled Banner One Shot: You Can’t Kid a Kiddo

Intro: It’s April Fools’ Day…and Tony is out to play. Avengers, beware!

Warnings: Bad language, very mild smut...no one gets naked.

Pairings: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

A/N:This is written for @wkemeup ‘s 4K Writing Challenge. My prompt was dialogue- “I take zero responsibility for this…”

This takes place in the Stark Spangled Banner timeline in April 2015 just before the events of AOU. Steve and my OFC (Katie Stark- Tony’s sister) have been together for 2 years ish and are engaged at this point as well. There’s also another Easter Egg in here for me to set up another One Shot I’m working on...

You don’t have to have read SSB to understand or enjoy this but feel free to check them out if you so wish. Stark Spangled Banner, and the prequel Stark Spangled Man can both be found here on my Masterlist.

Please re-blog and send me comments/thoughts. That’s my jam!

“You know…” he said, pulling back slightly to look at her, one of his hands tangling in the hem of the plaid button down she’d stolen from him to sleep in, as usual “Captain America doesn’t approve of theft.” “Captain America is an ass hole.” she grinned back “Stevie is my favourite.”

He gave a chuckle and leaned back against the sofa cushions, looking at her for a second “How did I get so lucky?” he asked, reaching up to tuck her long hair behind her ears. She smiled at him, her cheeks slightly flushed.

“What’s brought this on?” she asked, her hands sliding up his chest, resting on his shoulders, fingers gently playing with the collar of his polo shirt.

“Nothing.” he said, “Just seeing you before, today, with that reporter, just reminded me about how fierce...” he pressed a kiss to her lips “and loyal…” another kiss “and downright sexy you are when you’re angry…”

“He was a dick.” she mumbled, against his lips, her eyes narrowing slightly as she pulled back to look at him, his fingers gently tracing the outside of her thighs “I mean, it’s not like we haven’t already launched the publicity campaign already…”

“Well it’s big news.” he smiled up at her.

“Of course it will, it’s Harlan Thrombey…” she shrugged “His books are huge!”

“Did you ever get to the bottom of why he’s reached out to SIP to run the next one when he has his own publishing company?” “Oh something to do with his Son annoying him and needing to be taught not to take things for granted.” Katie shrugged “I can ask him that in October when we meet him to go over the final edit and discuss the covers and stuff… but that’s by the by. That ass-hat reporter should have been at the press launch like everyone else, not trying to accost us when we went out for lunch. And what the fuck has whether we’ve set a wedding date got to do with it anyway? Nosey bastard.”

Steve chuckled at her rant and looked at her, his eyes shining. “We haven’t set one though.”

“Yeah well, we’ve kinda had a bit going on.” she said, “Maybe once all this business with the sceptre is sorted we can think about it.” Steve sighed “I know, it’s taking a little longer than we hoped.”

“Well it’s only the end of March.” she shrugged “I’ve always wanted a summer wedding so it’s not…”

She trailed off and Steve saw her eyes widen and her mouth dropped open as she looked at him. “Oh shit…”

“Kitten, what is it?” he frowned.

“It’s the 31st March…” she looked at him, swallowing. Steve felt the colour draining from his face "Crap." The reason for their horror was simple. Because, forget Christmas or Thanksgiving, April Fools’ Day was Tony Stark's favourite time of year, as his long suffering sister could testify. When she was a kid, Tony had done the usual stuff. Flour in her talc, washing up liquid in her shampoo, paper shapes of bugs (never spiders though, he wasn't that cruel) in lampshades so when she turned the lights on she'd think she had a huge cockroach in there, that type of stuff. But, as she matured so did the pranks. At one time whilst she had been at the tower for a meeting JARVIS sent her an alert that someone had slashed her tyres in the carpark. She had sprinted outside to see photos of Slash from Guns and Roses struck to the side of her tyres. Another year Tony had hacked her StarkPhone and Laptop and changed the language to Chinese. Of course she couldn't read fucking Chinese to change it back. When she found an agent in SHIELD who did and he reversed it for her, within 30 seconds it had flicked over to Russian. And when she fixed that it became Swedish and so on and so on... Steve had also been the butt of a few pranks since he had known Tony. In 2013 he had fallen for the old toothpaste Oreo trick when a box had arrived for him allegedly from the cookie company themselves after Steve had been papped eating a packet. That had nearly made him sick. And then last year there had been the none stop phone calls asking for Franklin. Every time it was someone different and Steve was getting more and more frustrated as to who exactly Franklin was and why people thought he was on his number. Then, as he and Katie had been on the sofa making out, he'd gotten one last call…

"Leave it..." she said, her hands in his face turning her back to look at him. He kissed her again, hands sliding up the side of her torso, grinding his crotch down onto hers making her purr with delight as her hands strayed to the buckle of his belt, soft fingers gently skimming his abs as she made to undo it, his tongue tangling ferociously with hers as he gave a soft moan of pleasure... But his phone was going again. Katie sighed as he dropped his head to her chest, mumbling a curse. "Unless that’s a Code Red, you can tell whoever it is to fuck off." she said with a frustrated growl, her head flopping back against the cushion as he reached over and answered it, still led over her. "Rogers..." he said sharply. It was another unknown number, but not an unknown voice. "Hi this is Frankin!" Tony greeted him Steve let out a growl of frustration as he realised he had been had. "Have there been..." pause as the inventor laughed "I'm sorry, have there been any calls for me?" "Tony I swear to god!" he spat through gritted teeth as the inventor cackled and hung up. "Your brother is a dick." he looked down at Katie, shaking his head. "Well yeah, I know that…" Katie looked up at her boyfriend "What did he just do?" "Those calls I’ve been getting all day. Asking for Franklin?" He looked at her and she nodded "it was him."

She paused and then let out a laugh “Ok, to be fair, that’s a pretty good one…” “I hate him.” he mumbled, dropping his head back to her chest.

She chuckled again, and ran her fingers through his hair. “Hey, Stevie…wanna get him back?" “How?” Steve queried, propping himself up on his elbows, looking at her.. “Call him...” she grinned, leaning up and nipping at his jaw line softly as he closed his eyes “Leave the phone on the table...” she bucked up under him, wriggling her hips, his trousers feeling uncomfortably tight again “and let him listen to us make out”

Steve hadn’t done that, because, well frankly the thought of anyone listening to them wasn’t a great turn on in his books so Tony had gone another year of getting away with it.

Simply put, Tony was king of the pranks, and this year he had the entire team at the tower to torment.

“We should warn the others…” Steve looked at her, and with a sigh she nodded. She untangled herself from him and straightened the legs on her denim shorts.

“JARVIS?” she asked.

“Yes Miss Stark…” “Where are the rest of the team?”

“Agent Romanoff and Agent Barton are in the Common Room.” he spoke “Thor is in his quarters as is Mr Stark and Dr Banner is in the Lab…”

“I’ll text Nat, Clint and Banner.” she said, nodding “Can you go see Thor…he doesn’t have a phone and I’m not asking JARVIS to do it in case Tony catches on…” Steve nodded “Yeah, I’ll pop down and see him now.” Giving her a quick kiss he straightened his pants slightly and headed towards the hidden elevator, selecting the right floor. Thor and Clint shared one of the highest floors in the tower, both preferring to be higher up, closer to the roof but it was still below their’s. Exiting the elevator, he turned left and knocked on the door.

“Captain?” Thor answered and stepped back. “To what do I owe this pleasure?” “It’s not strictly pleasure I’m afraid Thor…” Steve sighed “I’m hear with a warning.” “A warning?” he frowned.

“Yeah, you got five minutes? It’s gonna take some explanation.”

***** Tony was giggling to himself as he put the final touches to the last of his pranks, before closing the door to the Lab and heading back to his floor. None of the team were up yet, it was ridiculously early, but the early bird catches the worm and all that. Fuck Killian and his second mouse bullshit. He had been toying with setting it all up the previous evening but he didn’t trust Kiddo and Spangles not to do some kind of recon mission before they went to bed.

“What have you been doing?” Pepper mumbled to him as he walked back into their dark bedroom.

“Nothing…” he said, with a grin, leaning down to give her a peck.

“Bullshit.” Pepper mumbled against his lips. “It’s April Fools Day…” “Is it?” he said, innocently and she rolled her eyes “JARVIS?”

“Yes Sir?”

“Hey buddy, I need you to set up an alert for me for today. If anyone goes into my office, or the garage, or anywhere in the tower messing with my equipment I wanna know about it.”

“Of course Sir.”

Tony grinned as he headed into the bathroom for a shower. “Game on, Avengers...”

Prank 1.

Steve was the first victim. He and Katie were making their way, cautiously, down to the large meeting room where they were all due to congregate to look over the plans of an abandoned British prison they suspected of being a Hydra base. They made sure to check round each corner before they walked round it, checking up high, low, everywhere.

But there was no avoiding this prank.

Steve pressed his palm to the Biometric Pad on the meeting room door and the pair of them gave a loud yell and a jump as their ears were assaulted by a sudden chorus.

“Who's strong and brave here to save the American Way? Who vows to fight like a man for what's right, night and day?”

“Oh for fucks sake…” Steve groaned as he pulled open the door, the song echoing through the PA system.

“Who will campaign door to door for America? Carry the flag shore to shore for America? From Hoboken to Spokane? The Star Spangled Man with a plan!”

Clint and Natasha were stood, poised at the table, both wearing identical looks of astonishment on their faces. They turned to Katie and Steve as they walked into the room, the song still playing.

“We can't ignore there's a threat and a war we must win! Who'll hang a noose on the goose-stepping goons from Berlin?”

“I’m assuming this means Cap is the first of us to fall victim to Stark?” Clint asked, his lips quirking into a smile.

“Who will indeed lead the call for America? Who'll rise or fall, give his all, for America?”

“Please tell me it isn’t going to go through a full rendition…” Steve sighed, dropping into a chair.

“Who's here to prove that we can? The Star Spangled Man with a plan!”

Silence. The 4 of them waited with bated breath, but thankfully it had stopped.

“Just the first two verses…” Katie said, sitting next to him. “Suppose we should be grateful.” “Kiddo, you’re as much of a sneak as Tony…” Clint looked at her, as Thor walked into the room. “How come you’ve never managed to get him back?”

“He’s too smart.” she sighed, “I’ve tried and tried before. It doesn’t help that he has JARVIS either, watch this…JARVIS?”

“Yes Miss Stark?”

“Has my brother got an alert going for you to warn him if we try and prank him?” “I couldn’t possibly comment Miss Stark, on whether or not your brother has an alert set up to warn him if you attempt to tamper with any of his equipment…”

Normally she would chuckle at the AIs tone but she was too frustrated with her brother and the seeming lack of loopholes in any of his instructions she could exploit. She leaned back in her chair and gave a huff “See?”

“I could just shock him with some lightning?” Thor suggested

“Think that’s a little harsh.” Steve sighed.

“See if you still think that by the end of the day when every time you open a door that song starts.” Natasha looked at him.

“What, you think…” Steve looked at her and then gave a groan. “It’s not just gonna be the one door is it?”

_____

Tony, watching the events unfold on the display in the safety of his office cackled. “Of course it isn’t just one door…” _______

Prank 2.

He made it to his lab in one piece, opened the door and stopped dead.

In front of him on the floor, for about 2 metres square were cups of water. And they were positioned hat close together that there was no space for him to step over in any direction without them spilling all over the floor. Which meant he couldn’t get into the room. Had it been anyone else, they would probably have simply kicked them over, but not Bruce. He was always paranoid about the liquid seeping through the floors and down onto the machinery which looked after the Iron Legion.

So if he was going to get into the lab, he was going to have to move them one cup at a time.

“Damned you Tony!” he said with a loud, exasperated sigh “JARVIS? I need a bucket…”

_______

Tony, watching the events unfold on the display in the safety of his office cackled. “Good luck finding one Brucey…”

_______

Prank 3.

“I don’t think there’s much else to go on…” Steve sighed as the rest of the team finished looking over the plans “We need to get out there and do a recon really.“

“We prepping for another mission then, Cap?” Clint looked at him. Steve took a deep breath and nodded.

“I don’t think we have an alternative.”

“Ok, well, if we get everything ready we can go at first light tomorrow.” Natasha suggested “I’ll get onto the British Authorities, let them know we’re planning on coming.” “Get Hill onto it” Katie suggested “She’ll go through the UN.”

With that an alert sounded on her phone and she looked down at it. “I gotta go take a conference call but I’ll be back as soon as I can.” Steve nodded to her as she stood up and left the room. She made it to her office, safely and swung the door open, pausing just to make sure nothing fell from the door frame. She darted through, took a look round and everything seemed to be in order.

Suspecting Tony of most likely sabotaging her computer or screen, she sat down on her chair and a loud horn sounded causing her to scream and involuntarily he entire body jumped, and her chair toppled backwards. She went with it, arms and legs flailing and she hit the floor with a crash.

After taking a moment to sort herself out she stood up, and looked at the bottom of her chair. There was an Airhorn strapped to the main leg which mean as soon as she had sat down, it would push the handle causing it to sound.

“I know you’re watching this you fucker!” she yelled, spinning round to the CCTV camera and flicking it off “I hate you!”

_____ Tony, watching the events unfold on the display in the safety of his office cackled. “Nice fall Kiddo…”

_______

Prank 4.

Given that there was nothing else to do, Natasha decided to head to the gym, as she did every Tuesday morning, to practice Pilates. It was a routine she tried not to break as it helped her keep supple and relax. Katie sometimes joined her, and surprisingly so did Steve. He said it helped keep his mind clear.

She entered the room and glanced up and around, checking the corners, you name it. Satisfied that no one was going to jump out at her, and even if they did, she’d floor them- more fool you, Stark, she leaned up against the bench and stretched her legs out.

“Who's strong and brave here to save the American Way? Who vows to fight like a man for what's right, night and day?”

She spun to see Steve shaking his head as he made his way into the room in his gym gear

“You joining me or hitting the bag?” she asked as they both tried to ignore the song as it continued ringing from the speakers.

“Joining you if that’s ok?” he said, “I went for a run this morning so…” “Sure.” she nodded, and as the song finally stopped they made their way to the store cupboards, picking out their mats. Natasha picked her favoured one, and lay it down on the floor.

As soon as she stepped on it there was a loud popping noise, like a gun going off, and she jumped backwards, dropping to the floor by instinct.

“Nat…” Steve said, a smile tugging at his lips “It’s ok, it’s not a gun.” Angrily she stood up, stalked over to the mat and pulled it up off the floor. She examined it a little before she gave a snort.

“Bastard!” she exclaimed, slipping her hand into a small, almost invisible hole on the underside. She pulled out a tiny little firecracker, the type that kids used to throw on the floor in front of someone to make a loud bag. “He’s filled my mat with these!”

______

Tony, watching the events unfold on the display in the safety of his office cackled. “Even Super Spies get fooled, Romanoff…”

_______

Prank 5 and 6.

“I don’t know how you’ve put up with it for your entire life.” Clint said to Katie as he opened the fridge, pulling out a can of his favoured Dr Pepper. He grabbed a glass and a few ice cubes, the way he always like his soda and walked over to where they were all sat on the sofas with various lunch items on the coffee table. He poured the soda into the glass and set it on the table.

“Yeah well, you better be careful.” Katie said “You too Thor, there’s no way he hasn’t set one up for you both.” “I am mighty Little Stark.” Thor grinned, nursing a plate of his favoured chocolate and sugar covered strawberries he had snaffled from a tray in the fridge “it will take more than…” “SHIT!” Clint exclaimed, and with a loud yell they all jumped back as the soda in his glass was exploding over the top with such veracity it was showering them all in the sticky drink. As Steve and Natasha headed to grab some paper towels, Katie marched over to the freezer and yanked out the ice dispenser tray.

“He’s put fucking Mentos in the ice cubes!” she said with a shake of her head. “Jesus Christ…” “You gotta hand it to him.” Bruce sighed, wiping his glasses off on his shirt

“I’d like to hand it to him.” she mumbled, “with my fist closed.” Thor gave a chuckle and popped a strawberry in his mouth, before he gave a grimace, gagged and spat it back out onto the plate.

“That’s…” he stood up, nearly pushing Steve over in his attempt to get to the sink.

Katie watched him as he grabbed a glass of water and filled it from the tap.

“What...” Natasha looked at Bruce who was examining a piece of the fruit, holding it in front of his nose.

“Salt…” Thor mumbled as he rinsed his mouth out “It isn’t sugar, its salt. He put salt on my Chocolate Sugar Fruit!”

_____

Tony, watching the events unfold on the display in the safety of his office cackled. “Ice Ice baby... not so mighty after all Thunder God.”

_______

*******

“We have to get him back…” Natasha grumbled as they all sat in Katie and Steve’s apartment, having retreated to the relative safety as their living quarters were the one place there was no CCTV, and Katie had the authority to banish JARVIS from earwigging. (Tony had learnt that lesson one day after hearing something he really didn’t want to hear…)

“What you thinking?” he asked and she grinned at them all.

“Ok, listen up.” she said, leaning forward. “I have an idea...”

“That might just work.” The Doctor said “It’s a pretty good loophole, and we have the stuff in the lab so…” “I’ll need a distraction.” Katie said, “something that’s gonna draw Tony out of his office for long enough for me to do it but…” “That’s easy.” Thor said, “I’m sure I can cause a good deal of noise in the Training Facility, break a few things with my hammer…”

“Fry something.” Steve said, looking round “If you do that then JARVIS won’t be able to fix it remotely, Tony’s gonna have to get his hands dirty.”

“You all know what you’re doing?” Katie grinned as everyone nodded. “Ok, Avengers, let’s do this…“

Operation Payback.

Tony heard the bang seconds before JARVIS spoke

“Mr Stark…”

“What the hell was that?”

“There’s been an incident in the Training Suite.”

“Course there has…” Tony rolled his eyes in exasperation at how stupid they thought he was. He wasn’t falling for a distraction like that. “Where is everyone?” “Miss Stark, Agent Romanoff and Agent Barton are in the shooting range.” Jarvis informed them. Doctor Banner was in his lab, although it appears he is now making his way down to the Training Facility to find out what’s going on. Captain Rogers is already there as is Thor.”

“What’s the incident?”

“It appears Thor has struck the speakers and the access pad with a bolt of lightning.” JARVIS replied “I’m currently assessing the damage but as a result he is locked in. And he isn’t happy.” Tony gave an exasperated groan and pushed his chair from his desk. “Suppose I best go see if I can help…remember what I said, anyone comes in here and tampers with my equipment…” “Of course, Sir…”

When Tony arrived Thor was kicking the door to the training facility, waving his hammer irately.

“Thor!” Steve was stood by the glass, attempting to calm him down. “Don’t buddy, we’ll get you out of there…” “I can get myself out…” Thor blazed, raising his hand and Tony blanched at the fact Thor was threatening to send his hammer straight through the wall. It wasn’t an uncommon occurrence for the walls and glass to get damaged but they’d only just had it replaced after Steve and Thor had been practicing using Steve’s shield and Mjolnir to cause an outwards blasting shockwave.

“What’s going on?” Tony asked, and Steve spun to him shooting him a glare.

“I’ll tell you what’s going on…” Thor roared “That infernal song…”

His hammer crackled ominously again and Tony looked back to Steve.

“He was fed up of hearing Star Spangled Man With A Plan ringing out every goddamned time I opened a door.” Steve folded his arms “So he lost his temper. And I can’t say I blame him.” “We’ve talked about this.” Tony looked at Thor “You need to use your words buddy…” “Words, I’ll give you more than words, Stark!” Thor roared “Now get me out of here!”

“JARVIS?” Tony asked, looking at the pad on the door. “Damage report?”

“The Circuit is completely fried Sir.” JARVIS said “I cannot access or override, you will need to do it manually.”

“Great…” Tony mumbled “Let me just go get my tools from the lab.” Mumbling to himself he set off down the corridor and once he was gone, Thor grinned and tossed his hammer in the air as he gave Steve and Banner the thumbs up before he caught it expertly again in his right hand.

“Good job!” Steve nodded with a smile as he pulled his phone out and dialled Katie quickly. “You’re up.”

****

It took Tony roughly 30 minutes to replace the wires and unlock the door. Thor stormed out, pushed him harshly in the chest before he left down the corridor.

“Guess they don’t have April Fools’ day on Asgard.” Tony mumbled, rubbing at the front of his shirt.

“To be honest Tony, it’s pretty annoying.” Bruce sighed “Can you at least turn it off now, I mean its almost 2 in the afternoon.” “Yeah I suppose…” Tony sighed, before he grinned “it was a pretty good one though, right.” “Hilarious.” Steve deadpanned, his hands falling to his belt buckle. Tony flashed him a grin and a shrug before he gathered up his tools and made his way back down the corridor.

“JAR?”

“Yes Sir.”

“Turn off Prank Spangles will you, before anyone else breaks more of my tower.”

“Right away Sir.” “And I’m assuming from the lack of contact no one’s been in my office tampering with my equipment?” “That’s correct sir.” “Today has been a good day.” Tony grinned to himself.

“S’up Kids?” he asked and none of them looked at him. “Ok, alright, I know…sorry if I pranked you but if I buy takeout will that make you forgive me?”

No answer.

“Oh come on!” Tony said, crossing the room, sinking into a spare arm chair. “I’ll get Thai…"

“To be fair, that trick with the water was pretty clever.” he shrugged.

“Yeah, and I suppose the salt strawberries were a little amusing.” Thor said, looking at Katie.

She shrugged, her feet resting in Steve’s lap as he was gently running his fingers up and down her calf.

“Oh come on Kiddo…” Tony sighed, flopping onto an arm chair.

“Payback’s a bitch…and so are you.” she said simply, still not looking at him.

“You’ve never managed to get me back yet.” Tony snorted.

At that point he noticed that Natasha and Clint exchanging smirks.

“What?”

“Nothing.” Clint said, shaking his head.

“I like your beard” Thor said, grinning “I have always admired how you keep it so neat and groomed. Maybe I should trim mine the same way.” Tony frowned. “Oh is this the part where you pin me down and shave it?” he rolled his eyes “You know I can call my suit to me in like 5 seconds flat.” “We know.” Steve said simply, looking at him. Tony’s frown deepened. The way the Captain’s blue eyes were shining with mirth made him uncomfortable.

He looked round as 6 pairs of eyes were all completely focussed on him now before Katie cracked up laughing.

“I’m sorry, I can’t…I can’t hold…” her laughter grew more and more as she threw her head back against the arm of the sofa “You look ridiculous…” Tony frowned and without a word stood up from the chair and made his way to the bar to glance in the mirrored surface between the shelves.

Oh. Holy. Jesus.

His goatee. His beautiful goatee...was blonde.

“What…how…” Tony spluttered, looking again at his reflection, before he glared back at the group.

“Slipped a little peroxide in your beard oil…” Katie managed to stutter between laughs, Thor’s loud rumbles continued, punctuated every now and then by a snort from Banner.

“JARVIS!” Tony roared “I told you to tell me if anyone went into my office, or the garage, or anywhere in the tower messing with my stuff…” "I take zero responsibility for this...sir” The AI responded “And I believe your instruction was to alert you if anyone entered your office or the garage or anywhere in the tower and messed with your equipment. Technically Miss Stark didn't touch your equipment, only your Male grooming product. I believe they exploited a loophole.” That made the group laugh even harder as Tony went bright red, spluttering obscenities at JARVIS. Eventually he calmed down and sighed, before he glanced at his sister.

“You know I’m almost proud…” he said, shaking his head. “Almost…”

Katie gave him a wink in response. “You know what they say…you can’t kid a kidder, or in this case Kiddo…”

Tony gave a groan which turned into a resigned chuckle. He could always dye it back...

Yes, April Fools’ day was still Tony Stark’s favourite time of year.

@the-omni-princess @momobaby227 @geekofmanythings16 @angelofhell-666 @thewackywriter @marvelfansworld @cobalt-gear @asgardlover75 @jennmurawski13 @jtargaryen18 @saiyanprincessswanie @navispalace @patzammit @joannaliceevans-fanficblog @icanfeelastormbrewing @djeniiscorner @ayamenimthiriel @coldmuffinbanditshoe @disneylovingal @madzmilllz @sgtjaamesbaarnes

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infinityactual · 4 years

Text

Headcanon Time!

Okay so. Tom and Sarah and bros, change my mind. Not hate to folks who have them as an OTP, it's good ship, just not quite my flavor.

After more artchat w @katwylder while she pecks away at work, we've got a lot of ideas.

-Sarah isn't much concerned with style. Her closet is 98% a catch-all of stuff that USED to match maybe ten years ago, but over time became mismatched, especially after the Spartan augs.

When she's not in UNSC or Spartan gear, we feel like she'd have College Student Vibes: knit track shorts, a hoodie, cheap flip-flops, cheezy sunglasses and like, a random hat. Whatever still fits and is comfy. She's also a sucker for godawful loud, garish Hawaiian shirts and has a bunch of "My friend went to X Place and all I got was this stupid t shirt" shirts.

We also talked a lot about her heritage, since the actress she's visually based on is half white Canadian and half Korean.

I think it's likely that she remembers enough of her birth family to keep in touch with her Korean heritage, but willingly picked up a lot from her adoptive family as well. I could see her in Hanbok (sp?) and think she'd rock it.

-She and Lasky bond and spend time together usually over food and hockey. I headcanon Tom and Cad played it as kids to stay busy and burn energy, though I don't think Tom is a hardcore fan w/ a fave team or anything, but its fun to watch. I have an idea in my head where Sarah found Tom watching a game and looking like a sad puppy, so came and joined him, and started asking questions about the game. Now it's a semi-regular thing they do; hang out, have a few, chat and half-watch whatever game is on.

-I feel like Tom and Sarah would also bond over Asian food, and now and then when he has time and energy, Tom invites Sarah over and cooks for the two of them. There is not a single romantic thing about it, but do they tell the crew? Hell no. It wouldn't make a difference, people would still think they're fuckin', and saying they're not would make it worse. The rumors really fly when Tom asks if she wants him to make breakfast in the morning next time she's over. (Nobody will ask eithet of them what's up, either. A few people have seen Palmer at Tom's door, but she always gave them A Look that said "I will rip your dick off and beat you to death with it")

-Sarah is 100% Tom's wingman. She covers for him on occasion before they go public, teases and picks at him about his bae, and is genuinely happy he has someone.

However, much as she supports his thing with John, later, I feel like both Spartans would end up succumbing to thier Competitive Eight-Year-Old inner selves at some point.

I could definitely see her and John going into the War Games, and I think Sarah would actually hold her own for a while out of sheer fucking tenacity, and probably some reluctance on John's part to really, honestly give his all because he doesn't see this as a life-or-death match, just sparring. But even if it were a knock-down-drag-out fight, I could see Sarah really giving John a tough time because she's just that goddamn determined.

-Sarah loves cats, and being ridiculous and cute with them. But nobody knows this, and if anyone found out, she'd threaten to fire them out of one of the MAC guns.

-I don't feel like Sarah is all that feminine just because its not who she is. Yeah, she'll wear fitted clothing now and then, but not for any other reason than it's clothing and it fits. She doesn't go out of her way to be girly, but she's not opposed to it, either. Like, she doesn't hate pink, or get nauseous at the idea of lace or think makeup is stupid or anything. She just does what she feels like, and that happens to not be super-feminine very often.

-I do think she wrestles a lot with the feeling of having to at least try and be stoic, professional and aloof around coworkers because of her rank as Spartan Commander, and I think that it really bothers her when her temper gets the better of her and she loses her cool.

That's all I can remember for the moment.

#halo #sarah palmer #headcanons #thomas lasky #character analysis

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shadowthrone-ammanas · 4 years

Note

Request prompt: The reason why Hat Kid decided to steal back her Time Pieces from the Empress wasn't JUST to get back what was hers, but she was also afraid that the cat crime lady was going to turn on her (much like how Mustache Girl, the bird movie director(s), and the Snatcher turned on her when it came to the magical hourglasses).

Thank you for the request! The immense amount of salt I have for how Nyakuza Metro ends really comes through on this one. Also, the return of Venomous Hat Kid entirely to cater to said saltiness.

Betrayal

Hat Kid probably would’ve enjoyed working for the Empress if it wasn’t for a couple key things. The main one being the whole stealing the Time Pieces from her – particularly annoying because if Hat Kid wasn’t up against an entire gang, she would’ve destroyed anyone who dared attempt such a thing. But on a much smaller note, working for the Empress would’ve eventually led to Hat Kid getting betrayed again because that’s how people on this planet seemed operate.

It was annoying and frustrating but Hat Kid wouldn’t have cared so much if the Empress didn’t have a whole gang of cats backing her up. If she sicked them all on Hat Kid, she wouldn’t stand a chance against them and would be forced to run away. Not because she was a coward though, recognizing when one couldn’t possibly win a fight and thus avoiding it was not cowardice or shameful. She’d still far and above prefer not to have to do any running away though because it felt cowardice and shameful in the moment.

So, both to get back the Time Pieces and to be the person doing the betraying this time she did some sleuthing. Like a fool, the Empress kept the Time Pieces in her vault in the jewelry shop, an easy place to get into. She had to wait until the shop was closed to get in though.

She returned in the dead of night. The Metro was much quieter and felt empty by comparison even if there were still plenty of people wondering around. There were even still a few food carts open for business. It’d be nice to stop at one but she had an epic betrayal to get to. Though was it really ‘epic’ if she was just going to steal back the Time Pieces and then leave? She probably wasn’t even going to fight the Empress even if she would really like to. Not very epic at all. Oh well though, it was her first time betraying someone, it didn’t have be epic.

Getting into the jewelry store was far too easy. A trap perhaps? But Hat Kid made it all the way into the vault and started gathering up her Time Pieces with nothing happening. Maybe the Empress was just cocky and sure of everyone’s fear of her and thus didn’t bother with good security. Well, she’d know better after this.

Hat Kid was pocketing the final Time Piece when…

“You!”

She jumped and turned to see the Empress standing in the doorway. Now might be a good chance to beat her up! But… she might have her goons around, probably did in fact. Getting cornered in a money vault by a horde of angry cat people was not how Hat Kid wanted to die. Ugh! Instead she switched her hat to the time stop hat and dashed past.

She didn’t make a clean get away though because said horde of angry cat people were waiting outside. The Empress’ call over the intercoms to catch Hat Kid only sealed the deal on Hat Kid having to run for her life. It was frustrating but she had no choice. Her ‘epic’ betrayal turned out to be quite lame as it ended in a dumb chase scene – chase scenes would only be fun if she was the on doing the chasing.

She ran and ran, hating every second of it because she wanted to fight but ugh. There were a few times she was tempted to anyway. Going down in battle wouldn’t be a bad death but she wasn’t ready to die yet and as long as there was a chance of escaping to fight again another day, she had to take it.

Eventually she did get away. Or at least she thought she had until she ended up on an elevator with the Empress. It was just two of them though, no hordes of angry cats. So as the Empress spoke smugly about something that wasn’t worth paying attention to, Hat Kid reared back and sprung at her, aiming for the face and not evening bothering the umbrella.

The Empress cut off midsentence with a hiss, raising an arm to block Hat Kid. Which was the exact thing Hat Kid was after; she grasped the Empress’ arm with both hands and sunk her teeth in. The satisfying taste and sensation of blood flooded her mouth as she injected almost her entire store of venom into the bite.

The Empress clawed at her face, missing clawing out her eyes by only a few centimeters. Not wanting to push her luck, Hat Kid let go, landing on her feet. If the venom wasn’t effective, she might be in trouble since dodging would be difficult in a space as small as an elevator but she pulled out her umbrella anyway. She was prepared to fight to the death if she had to.

“You bit me,” the Empress hissed, offended.

“Peck-neck,” Hat Kid replied as she lifted her free hand, extending only the middle finger. It probably wasn’t a rude gesture on this planet but she didn’t care.

Regardless, it enraged the Empress. She attacked with another claw swipe that Hat Kid barely raised the umbrella in time to block. As she reared back for another attempt, Hat Kid jumped forward, jabbing the point of the umbrella into the Empress’ midsection as hard as she could.

She hissed as she side stepped, swiping at Hat Kid again. Her move was slower though and it hit the umbrella with noticeably less force. And her face was contorted with pain more than anger. The venom was working! Soon she should be incapacitated! Hat Kid had won! Her betrayal was epic after all!

“What did you do?” the Empress finally hissed after a third failed attack. She hugged her bleeding arm to her chest instead. It was swelling enough for it to be visible. “Poison?”

“No, silly, it’s venom,” Hat Kid corrected her. What kind of person didn’t know the difference?

The Empress’ eyes widened. She wasn’t whimpering though, probably because she was tough. “Is it deadly?”

“It killed the Mafia goon I bit a while ago so probably. It took hours though so you still got a little time left. I’d tell you to enjoy it but I know you won’t. But I win! I betrayed you before you could betray me so ha, take that!” She whacked the Empress with the umbrella again, knocking her over this time. She pulled back the umbrella again; she’d be merciful and knock the Empress unconscious before she died or maybe snap her neck. She’d done it to herself by cornering Hat Kid but she didn’t deserve to suffer the way the Mafia goon had. Before Hat Kid could even start the swing though, the doors pinged and opened, revealing a pair of cops about to get on.

“Uh… hi,” Hat Kid smiled at them as she quickly put the umbrella behind her back. “This isn’t…”

“Don’t you assholes dare let her get away with killing me!” the Empress hissed. “Catch her and get an antivenom off her now!”

Hat Kid froze before shouting the first thing that came to her mind, “You’ll never take me alive coppers.” It’s what people said in the movies so it had to be good because she certainly didn’t have time to deal with getting in trouble with the law on this planet.

They took her alive of course. They had guns and Hat Kid was cornered in an elevator so running away wasn’t possible. Before carting her off to jail they had the paramedics come for the Empress. The paramedics made Hat Kid bite a weird thing and expel the last of her stored venom, supposedly so they could try to make an antivenom to save the Empress. Though if they wanted to save her, they’d be better off cutting her arm off before the venom spread too far because as far as Hat Kid knew there was no cure for the venom. She even told them that.

After that though, they took Hat Kid to the police station. Once there they took all her stuff and put her in her own little holding cell because she was a kid and they didn’t know what to do with her. At her insistence, they did give her food though. Not as much as she wanted or needed after how much venom she’d spent but it would have to do for now.

“I demand my one phone call now,” she shouted as soon as she was done.

The nicer of the two cops who’d arrested her returned. “I thought you said you didn’t have any parents or legal guardians.” They’d asked her for her parents’ number upon arriving at the station. “We were trying to figure out what to do with you because of that.”

“I don’t but I do have friends.”

The cat narrowed his eyes. “Are any of them adults?”

“Yep. So phone call please.”

“You should’ve said that sooner but fine, let’s go.” He unlocked the cell and led her out into the hallway. He led her back to the front desk to use the phone there; apparently, she wasn’t even allowed to walk by the cells holding the other criminals. How unfair, she’d wanted to see them.

Whatever though, she picked up the phone and dialed Snatcher’s number. When she’d gifted him that cellphone, she never would’ve thought she’d need to call it under these circumstances. He had a tendency not to answer sometimes though so… He picked up on the third ring.

“Uh… how’d you get this number?” he asked because he wouldn’t know who it was because she wasn’t using her phone.

“It’s me,” she said, pleased to hear a familiar voice. “Howdy!”

“Oh, of course, it’s you. Why are you calling on a phone that isn’t yours?”

“Well, it’s kind of a long story. But uh… the end result is I’m at the Metro Police Station because I’m in trouble with the law for possibly maybe probably killing someone in front of the cops. So I’d very much appreciate it if you came down and helped me out.”

There was a beat of silence before Snatcher laughed, loud enough to make her flinch a little. “Wow kiddo,” he said when he was done. “You’re a murderer. I didn’t think you had it in you, good job.”

“I didn’t say I murdered her. She might live, they’re trying to save her anyway. She did deserve it though and if she does die it’s her own fault. But that’s beside the point, could you please come help. You’re a lawyer and stuff so I know you can.”

“Hmm… fine, kiddo I’ll come bail you out or deal with any court stuff if it’s needed but only because I want to know what happened and so I can see your first time in jail because knowing you, that’s probably going to be a common occurrence.”

“Thank you! See you soon!” Hat Kid hung up and looked up at the cops watching her. “My BFF is on his way. He’s lawyer so he should be able to handle all of whatever it is that needs handled hear.” And maybe she’d actually get to see him do real lawyer stuff that wasn’t just contracts. That’d be cool. Regardless though, she had full confidence that this situation was basically already fully handled. Hopefully the paramedics and doctors would find a way to save the Empress though because Bow would be real sad if she learned Hat Kid had killed a kitty cat.

For this drabble event.

#My Writing #ahit #A hat in time #Hat Kid #the empress #venomous Hat Kid #potential major character death

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vagrantblvrd · 5 years

Text

Lay Your Bones Down (1/1)

Summary: When it comes to soulmates people tend to fall into two camps of thought.

Notes: Prompt fill for the wonderful @ahwuum who has been super patient and supportive. <333!

(Read on AO3)

When it comes to soulmates people tend to fall into two camps of thought.

The ones who go all-out looking for their soulmate. Buy into what Vinewood and other “experts” have to say on the mater. Read all the books on how to recognize the signs or whatever, watch the television specials and pay close attention to their horoscopes and magazines aimed at helping people find them.

Sign up for the websites and download the apps once they become available because it’s a driving force for them, part of their pursuit of happiness and everything.

Sometimes it works, they find their soulmate and live happy fulfilling lives with them.

Other times it doesn’t, and they make themselves miserable looking for a needle in a haystack all their lives and let every other chance for happiness pass them by and it’s. It’s just sad, is what it is.

Then you have the ones like Jeremy who – he’s not going to lie, okay.

He’s curious who his soulmate is. What kind of person they are, if they’d even like each other, get along like a house on fire or hate one another at first sight. (A different way of getting along like a house on fire, and to be honest saying’s always bothered him but that’s a conversation for another day, or something. Whatever.)

He used to think about it a lot more when he was a kid, bright future ahead of him and all these possibilities, right? Smart kid like him? Could have done anything.

And he did.

For a while.

Then one of his buddies got caught up in some trouble of his own making, and stupid idiot Jeremy thought he could help get him out. Only got dragged into the same kind of trouble and into a literal pit facing off against guys twice his size trying to get back out again.

Stopped wondering who his soulmate was when his primary concern was not getting his face beaten in, and then things escalated to the point all of that slipped to the back of his mind.

Soulmates and the criminal life don’t go so well together, puts a crimp in things. (He figured if he did meet his soulmate doing the things he does now, it wouldn’t be a ringing endorsement for either of them.)

So, yeah.

Jeremy pulls himself out of the fighting rings in Boston, but doesn’t do it clean. Has people who’d be glad to put him down, so he decides it would be a good idea to get the hell out while he still can.

Goes from city to city doing what he can to get by. Realizes he’s in a goddamned ridiculous line of work and figures if he can’t beat them he might as well join them (something like that) and goes all-in.

Picks up the Rimmy Tim thing somewhere along the east coast. Browsing through the offerings in a thrift store where he finds these hideous yellow suit pants. Catch his eye, have him cackling like an idiot, but that might be more the painkillers blunting the ache of a stab wound in his shoulder.

Finds a purple suit jacket a few cities over and something about it hits him just right.

It isn’t until he’s somewhere in Texas he spots the cowboy hat. Gas station with a tired looking woman on the register and news on the television talking about something going on in a city named Los Santos.

Jeremy gives her a bright grin, all nice and friendly because he’s just passing through, ma’am, no trouble here. Watches the footage of another gang war in progress play on the television as the woman rings his purchases up.

He’s been seeing more and more about Los Santos the closer he gets, figures it’s a big deal in this part of the country. (Liberty city’s got the east coast locked down for chaos and carnage.)

Gets this little itch going in the palms of his hands because everything he’s seen tells him it would be smarter to stay the hell away from a city like that, but.

Jeremy’s kind of an idiot.

And, you know.

There are still people out there with a grudge to bear against him and a city as big as Los Santos seems like a good place to get lost in.

Can’t possibly get caught up in anything big enough to make the news like half the things he’s seen so far anyway, right?

========

There are books out there that have a lot to say about the placement of people’s Names. Conflicting information based on what old wives tale the author grew up on, their region of the country.

All of them agree on one thing, though. Names closest to the heart mean you’re bound for a happy match once you find your soulmate, get that happily ever after everyone’s running towards.

Jeremy’s Name is on his back, running along his spine, and the one book he read about Name placements had nothing to say on the matter. Didn’t look further into things because he was afraid of what he’d find.

Awkward placement for him to get a good look at it, but he’d tried when he thought he had a chance to find his soulmate. (When it would have been a good thing.)

Did all sorts of crazy things to get a picture.

Tried taking a picture using the bathroom mirror but he only got parts of it in the frame. Set up a series of mirrors like an idiot and got better pictures out of it he played around in the edit mode to flip it.

Other things like that.

Realized his soulmate has the shittiest handwriting known to man or maybe something was wrong with his eyes because even now he can barely make out what it’s supposed to be.

A signature for sure, the way most of them are.

Starts with a big looping letter and ends in this indecipherable scrawl like whoever they are they either gave up along the way or couldn’t be bothered with the rest.

Sometimes he’ll catch sight of it in a bathroom mirror of whatever shitty motel or apartment he’s staying in, wonder what could have been.

========

Jeremy’s supposed to be watching this hacker.

Keep an eye on him to make sure he’s doing what he’s supposed to be doing, or keep him safe, his current boss didn’t specify.

Squirrely little bastard, though.

Scrawny.

Looks like a twig with a wild tuft of hair and this nose that got him picked on as a kid. (If the way the rest of the crew treats him is any indication, that never stopped.

Jeremy might feel bad about how the others treat the guy, if he wasn’t such an asshole.

And anyways, it’s his first job in Los Santos. Some dirty little gang that’s been outsourced to do a job for an ally of theirs.

He’s hired muscle here and so low down in the pecking order he might as well not even have a name.

Just Goon #2 or something.

“What kind of name is Rimmy Tim?” the hacker asks out of the blue, not bothering to look up from his work. “Did your parents draw it out of a hat like a raffle?”

The two of them are alone in the warehouse the gang operates out of. It would be real easy to kill him and pretend he didn’t know how it happened.

Just.

So easy.

The thing that stops Jeremy from doing it is that murder is a bit of an overreaction to the annoying bastard. And, he’s being paid to watch the guy so he’d be shooting himself in the foot. Also, it’s clear he’s not thinking about the words coming out of his mouth.

Some idle thought floating around in his head while he focuses on his work and no brain-to-mouth filter.

“Yeah,” Jeremy drawls. “They used this hat to do it to. Gave it to me on my eighteenth birthday to commemorate the occasion. Even gave me a lasso so I could catch my first horse.”

The hacker keeps tap-tap-tapping away on his laptop for a few moments afterward before he processes what Jeremy said.

Slowly lifts his head to squint at Jeremy like he’s sure he’s being fucked with, but also maybe not?

“Wait, what?”

Jeremy smiles and tips his hat at the asshole as he gets up to grab a beer out of the fridge.

========

As much as Jeremy tries not to think about the Name on his back, the rest of the world makes that impossible.

Television shows and movies. Best-sellers at the store. Songs on the radio. Marketing campaigns every-fucking-where and shoved down people’s throats at every turn.

No wonder so many obsess over their Name when they’re made so aware of it every waking moment.

It’s still kind of weird, though, listening to the guys he works with gossiping about them. Doesn’t matter who he’s working for, where he is, there’s always someone like that.

Stone-cold killers and no remorse to them, and they’ll kick back for a poker game and someone will start up a conversation about the Name on their shoulder.

Curling script and little hearts dotting the ‘i’ and wondering what they have to think about their own rough scribble of a name. (Good penmanship isn’t a requirement for their line of work.)

It’s enough to make Jeremy wonder what it is about Los Santos that people like them think about their soulmates like that. Hope they’ll get the chance to meet them even though they’re on the wrong side of the law and the odds of them getting something good out of it are so damn low.

========

Jeremy’s been in Los Santos for about a year, two, before his name gets put out there as someone people might want to watch out for.

Well, one of his names, anyway.

He still gets strange looks when he introduces himself as Rimmy Tim, but considering Los Santos is the kind of city where everyone’s scared of some idiot in a rubber mask calling himself the Vagabond, he figures he's doing alright for himself.

He’s been hired on by a crew that hasn’t tried to fuck him over since they brought him on to be an extra gun for them. (Yet.)

Decent pay that helps with the rent for the place he shares with a couple of idiots he’s fallen in with in Matt and Trevor, and until recently they were playing it smart.

Did nothing to attract the notice of the bigger crews in town, but that’s changed the last few weeks. His boss with his eyes set on moving up in the pecking order which means coming up against those same crews who could squash them flat with barely a thought.

Trevor keeps harping on him to get the fuck out, fake his death if he has to and have Matt gimmick him up a new identity, the whole works, because.

Fuck, because his boss is taking swipes at the Fake AH Crew.

Just about the worst crew to mess with, what with their reputation for not taking kindly to that kind of thing and all.

The crew Jeremy’s working for keeps bringing in new blood because they’re dropping likes flies with every skirmish they get into with the Fakes.

No mercy to the Fakes when one of theirs gets hurt, just this single-minded anger snapping back around on whoever is stupid enough to go after them.

If Jeremy was smarter, he’d listen to Trevor, he would. But Matt’s got these debts and smart as Trevor is he hasn’t been able to find a way to get him out of them other than paying them off. Jeremy does his part to help, which means being the kind of idiot out there tempting fate working for a certified moron with a death wish.

It’s how you say, not great.

Jeremy’s boss knows he wants out, but he also knows Jeremy doesn’t have a lot of say about it, so he keeps giving Jeremy the worst jobs. Sends him out with the other expendables on what amount to suicide missions and no skin off his nose if they don’t come back.

Which is how Jeremy ends up being partnered with some other disgraced bastard in the crew to put a little pressure on a weapons dealer looking to side with the Fakes. Convince him he’d do well to stick with them, but they pick a bad (good?) time to do with, what with the Fake AH crew members they run into there.

Guy in a leather jacket with a snarling wolf’s head on the back, the goddamned Vagabond, and some pretentious asshole with gold-framed sunglasses and stupid hair.

There’s a moment where they all stare at one another in shock, and then at the scumbag weapons dealer has the temerity to hiccup nervously before the shooting starts.

Jeremy’s not sure who fires the first round, but the moment they do it’s a free-for-all. Bad lighting and not the best anything and it’s confusing as hell.

Bullets flying and enough yelling to almost drown out the gunshots.

He hears one of the Fakes yell something about bringing the car around when things get bad. Sees a figure go pelting out a side door like a bat out of hell. The remaining Fakes doubling down to push Jeremy and his partner back, buy time or just put an end to things.

Jeremy drops behind cover, pops off a few shots and watches his partner – stupid asshole, stubborn as hell and just plain dumb – go down without a sound.

Swears under his breath and returns fire, with the realization he can get the hell out of there or die, and he knows which one he prefers. Cuts and runs like a coward, or just someone with a brain who doesn’t need to run the numbers to know he’s facing shitty odds, whichever.

He finds a door that leads to an alley and runs like hell until he hits a side street. Glimpses an ugly little purple car puttering down the street towards him from the corner of his eye and jumps in front of it to get the driver to stop.

Thanks God the idiot didn’t think to lock their door before he’s ripping it open and forcing them into the passenger seat, means to kick them out entirely but the Fakes find them before he can, spilling into the street.

“Fuck it,” Jeremy says, and “sorry, pal, but you’re probably safer in here than out there,” and then his foot is on the gas and they’re zooming out of the alley to...somewhere.

Jeremy doesn’t fucking know, okay.

He’s shot and bleeding and apparently a kidnapper now?

So.

Yeah.

He drives for God knows how long until he hears this quiet little laugh next to him. Incredulous, disbelieving, and -

“I can’t believe you still have the damn cowboy hat.”

Jeremy almost slams on the brakes because that voice.

British accent and infuriating as hell and what are the odds?

But, the part where he’s running from the Fakes and can’t do that – traffic and all – and just, it would be bad if he slammed on the brakes.

Instead he slows down a bit to keep from plowing into the car in front of them as it slows down to make a turn, and then whips around it the moment he can and keeps on going. Waves his gun in the hacker’s direction to shut him up, intimidate him, who knows, and heads to a safehouse he knows.

Only, the gun doesn’t shut the little idiot up, no.

“You’re bleeding,” Jeremy hears, which is not news to him.

He also hears, “That looks nasty,” which, he imagines it would. Bullet plus squishy human flesh and he’s not great at math, but even he can figure that one out.

Also?

“This is going to be so difficult to explain later.”

That makes no sense at all to Jeremy, but then the hacker’s reaching for his arm and Jeremy sends him a sharp look, because maybe don’t fucking do that when he’s got a gun sort of kind of aimed at him?

Takes a chance by taking his eyes off the road and almost swallows his tongue as he goes to tell him to very fucking politely not because -

“Oh, fuck me,” Jeremy mutters, because.

Stupid hair and gold-framed sunglasses, and Jeremy's kidnapped the Fake AH Crew’s Golden Boy by accident.

Accident.

There are people in Los Santos who’d pay an obscene amount of money for someone to do it on purpose and Jeremy did it by accident.

Awesome.

========

The Golden Boy plays it smart, in his own way.

Doesn’t shut up, no, but realizes Jeremy doesn’t appreciate him trying to stop him from bleeding all over the interior of his car (not so much the bleeding part as the potential risks of what he could do to Jeremy instead, so yeah) and keeps his damn hands to himself.

Babbles as Jeremy navigates backstreets and alleys to get to the shitty little safehouse Trevor scouted out for the three of them a few months back. Paranoid as hell, Trevor, and smart enough to know things would go to hell on them sooner or later.

Either Matt’s debts or the mess Jeremy’s trapped in, who the hell knows.

Trevor’s good about planning ahead, and Jeremy trusts him like no one else he’s met in this shithole city. (He trusts Matt, don’t get him wrong on that. But Matt is the same kind of dumb as Jeremy and it’s just. Better to look to Trevor for shit like this.)

Safe enough to hide out here to patch himself up, figure out what to do from there.

He parks the car a few streets over because you can never be too paranoid in this city. Pushes the Golden Boy ahead of him while they keep to the shadows and the gun ins his jacket pocket as incentive to go along with things for now.

No damn idea what he’s going to do with the little idiot, not that it matters because Jeremy’s fucked any way you look at it.

The Fakes will tear the city apart looking for him, and they know where to start looking. His own crew would sell him out in a heartbeat to save their own skins.

The only good part about this, if it can be called that, is that Trevor will figure out something went wrong when Jeremy doesn’t go back to their crappy little apartment and want to know what happened.

(Hell, now might not be a bad time to listen to him about faking his death before the Fakes find him.)

So until then...yeah.

It’s a mess.

Jeremy’s a mess, suit jacket ruined along with the shirt underneath. Something more than a simple graze that turns his stomach and hands nowhere near steady enough to stitch himself up.

“Fuck,” he says, and again a little stronger as he stares at the his wound, still bleeding sluggishly, ”fuck.”

The Golden Boy shifts. Nervous? Anxious? Who knows.

Says, quiet, careful, “I could help?” like he’s not sure how Jeremy will take it after the whole thing in the car with the glaring and everything that followed.

He shrugs when Jeremy looks up at him, pushes his stupid sunglasses up into his stupid hair. Looks tired without them hiding his eyes. Dark bags and under his eyes and this crooked little smile Jeremy doesn’t remember seeing before.

“I’ve done my share of stitching people up.”

There’s something to the way he says it that makes Jeremy believe it. Him. Whatever.

(The Fakes are known for being vicious about protecting their own, hurt one of them and you’re fucked and he’s never thought much about it before, but. There’s got to be a reason for it beyond not looking weak to their enemies, rivals.)

Jeremy’s out of options, knows he’s probably making a mistake here, but that part about being fucked anyway, so.

“Yeah, okay,” he says, and pushes the first-aide kit towards the Golden Boy.

Watches him like a hawk as he picks through the thing making these little tutting noises as he does because Jeremy may or may not have forgotten to restock it after the last time.

Rolls up his sleeves and Jeremy follows the motion without thought. Eyes going to the line of letters he can see just on the Golden Boy’s his inner forearm. Something familiar about them, but then the Golden Boy notices Jeremy staring.

Clears his throat and pulls his sleeve down to hide the Name inked on his skin. They’re a liability in this business, get people killed, and Jeremy pulls his gaze away guiltily.

“Sorry,” he says, because he’s an asshole and a ruthless criminal as these things go, but even he’s not that far gone. Not the kind of monster who’d take advantage of knowing who the Golden Boy’s soulmate is, use that against him. Not like he can say that and expected to be believed, but still. “It’s...sorry.”

He can feel eyes on him, knows the Golden Boy is watching him, judging him, and then there’s a little sigh.

“No worries, love,” he says, striving for bright and cheerful, just this hint of uncertainty, maybe even fear to it. “Not your fault, now is it?”

(Is it?)

Jeremy remains silent, winces as the Golden Boy sighs again before he picks up a washcloth Jeremy scrounged out of a cabinet to clean away the blood. He works quickly and efficiently, murmurs an apology when Jeremy hisses in pain as he plucks out cloth fibers and whatever else have gotten into the wound before he starts on the stitches.

Neat, even things, and a little laugh afterward when he says it might not scar noticeably.

Not a major concern for Jeremy, but still nice to know.

“Thanks,” he says, as the Golden Boy tapes off the bandage covering the stitches. “Just, uh. Thanks.”

Awkward as hell, thanking the guy you’ve kidnapped (accidentally, and he’s never going to get over that) for patching him up, but hey.

That’s Jeremy’s life in a nutshell.

(Or...something.)

He watches the Golden Boy pack the first-aide kit up nice and neat, reach for a stay bit of trash from the supplies he used, sleeve riding up again and this time Jeremy gets a good look at the Name on his arm.

Realizes why it had seemed so familiar from the glimpse he caught, and reacts without thinking.

Grabs the Golden Boy’s wrist with his good hand, painfully aware of the way the Golden Boy freezes like a deer in the headlights because Jeremy’s still got his gun and the whole being kidnapped thing.

Ignores the pain ins his bad arm as he pushes the Golden Boy’s sleeve up to reveal the Name on his inner forearm.

Jeremy’s name.

Knows his signature after years of using it, every upward sweep and downward loop, and his heart drops because this, this is how he meets his soulmate, of course it is.

“Jesus Christ,” Jeremy mutters, releasing the Golden Boy’s wrist, aware of the way he recoils away from him like he’s been burned. Holds his arm close to himself, hiding the Name on his skin from Jeremy, and he feels sick about his reaction.

(How could he? Why would he?)

Probably thinks Jeremy’s like all the other sick fucks in this city who’d pay anything to know whose Name someone has on their skin. Use it against them and do it happily because it gives them power over them, and fucking hell.

“I - “ Jeremy’s voice fails him and he thinks about just whipping his shirt off to show him why, but that’s.

Gonna send a bad message if he can’t explain himself first, and he can feel himself on the verge of laughing like a lunatic because this is not now he saw today going at all.

He looks up to see the Golden Boy watching him. Wary, as Jeremy would expect him to be after watching Jeremy act like the aforementioned lunatic.

“What,” the Golden Boy asks, voice cracking a little. “What was that all about?”

Jeremy stares at him, because he looks scared, sure, but also?

Angry.

Like he’d kill Jeremy rather than let him use his Name as a weapon or a threat against him. Willing to protect the idiot whose name is indelibly inked on his skin with everything he has because that’s what you do for your soulmate if you give even the tiniest of fucks about them. (Even without their unique situation.)

People are so stupid that way, and it’s both the funniest and saddest things about them to Jeremy.

Because.

He’s got a name running along his spine and he may not know a hundred percent what it is, what with the horrible handwriting, but he knows without a doubt it’s this little idiot’s.

Knows it like he knows every other important thing in his life, and this just complicates things even further, doesn’t it?

Rival crews and a carjacking that led to an (accidental) kidnapping. A soulmate that looks like he’s trying to decide the best way to kill him to keep Jeremy from using himself against him, and it’s getting real confusing in Jeremy’s head.

One thing he does know, though. He can’t let his soulmate (Jesus, Trevor will never let him live this down and neither will Matt) think he’s one of those scumbags who’d use his Name against him.

“Rimmy Tim isn’t my real name,” he says, which should be obvious by now because no self-respecting human being would go through life with it as a name and not have it legally changed at some point.

Just, no.

The Golden Boy’s still watching him. Cocks his head at Jeremy’s admission, eyes narrowing as he tries to figure out where Jeremy’s going with this.

“This is...” Jeremy trails off, knows if he just tells him his name is Jeremy it’s not going to come off well, given the current situation, so. “Uh, this is going to seem weird, but bear with me, okay?”

It’s a bit of a risk, what he’s about to do.

Turn his back on someone with every reason to use the opportunity to attack him, kill him, but he can’t think of a better idea. Just. No better idea and sure as hell doesn’t want his soulmate to think he’s in a situation where his Name is something to be used against him, that fear, even if it backfires on Jeremy.

He twists around and pulls his shirt up, hears the Golden Boy’s confused ”What?” and ”Oh, God, what?” and then this sharp inhale followed by silence.

A long, long moment of silence and this shuddery exhale, cool fingers on Jeremy’s back tracing the letters running along his spine.

Quiet laugh, shaky, and, “Bloody hell,” he hears, followed by, “I knew that couldn’t be your real name,” and another laugh that just sounds tired.

Which, yeah.

Jeremy gets that, he does.

He pulls his shirt back down and turns around to find the Golden Boy watching him again, but there’s a thoughtful quality to it this time.

“So,” he says like he still can’t believe it. “You’re my soulmate, are you?”

Hard to get a bead on how he feels about that, what with the being carjacked and kidnapped at gunpoint thing they have going for them. The way things are a little too Romeo and Juliet for Jeremy’s tastes seeing how well that went for all parties involved in that little disaster.

“Uh, yeah,” Jeremy says, for whatever it’s worth. “I guess I am.”

========

The mirror in the safehouse’s bathroom is dirty as hell, has this crack running straight down the middle of it like the fault lines under Los Santos.

Good enough to get a decent picture of his back at least, have Jeremy frowning at all the scars he’s picked up since the last time he did this. (Five, six years ago? Maybe longer.)

It’s late now, few hours past midnight and the Golden Boy’s sacked out in the bedroom. Tired after a long day and what seems to have been an even longer week for him. Put up a fight because he wasn’t the one with a bullet wound, but Jeremy had overruled him on the basis of 1.) being carjacked, and 2.) being kidnapped after being carjacked.

Not to mention the reason for the carjacking and subsequent kidnapping and just...everything else on top of that they haven’t addressed properly.

More like stared at one another for a long moment trying to process before the Golden Boy yawned, reminding them both of the late hour, and they decided it would be better to pick things back up in the morning.

Sleep on all of it and figure things out then and Jesus if that’s not reason for Jeremy to grab his stuff and get the fuck out. Run off with his tail between his legs before his soulmate tells him thanks for the terrifying day and all, but he just doesn’t see things working out between them – carjackings and kidnappings do not a good relationship make – but do take care.

But he hasn’t, has he. Is creeping around the safehouse being an idiot instead.

Jeremy sighs as he fiddles with the limited photo editor app on his phone, flips the picture he just took so he can read the Name on his back.

Everyone in Los Santos calls him the Golden Boy, sometimes though they refer to him as the Fake AH Crew’s Golden Boy, sometimes he’s Ramsey’s Golden Boy, but his name’s not a secret.

That first letter on Jeremy’s back is definitely a ‘G’, and knowing what he knows now, he can see the rest.

And now that he knows, he’s afraid to say it out loud because there are -

Just.

A lot of unknowns in their future.

Or, not.

At the very least, he knows who his soulmate is now, won’t have to wonder about it anymore, and that. Well, it has to count for something, doesn’t it?

========

“So now what?”

The Golden Boy – no, Gavin – is watching Jeremy closely. Head cocked to the side and so very careful.

Looking at him, Jeremy realizes he never searched him for weapons when they got the safehouse. Wasn’t in the frame of mind to think of it with the chaos of the shootout, pain from his injury and everything that followed. World-changing realizations and all.

Can spot at least one gun on him. A few knives. Who the hell knows what else because rumors say he worked with the Vagabond for a while before the Fakes snatched him up and he’s picked up a few habits of his along the way.

Good news, no immediate rejection regarding the soulmate situation. Bad news, he’s still not indicating how he feels about the fact Jeremy’s his soulmate.

Playing it safe, smart, given the everything else that’s happened or something else, Jeremy doesn’t know.

“What do you mean?” Jeremy asks, because what does that even mean?

Gavin gives him this look, and gestures at himself.

Ego aside, he makes for one hell of a prize.

Any of the Fakes would be to be fair, but the Golden Boy?

Jesus, what stroke of luck to catch him.

Hit the Fakes where it would hurt the most because he’s always been considered untouchable, all these attack dogs keeping him from harm and poster boy for the crew, more so than Ramsey ever was.

Silver-tongued negotiator with an impressive string of successes behind him in the allies the Fakes have won over to their side since they clawed their way to the top.

That whole thing where he’s got a price on his head in the city only the craziest bastards would even think about cashing in on. Catch him and sell him to the highest bidder and live a life of luxury. (Until the Fakes found out who’d managed it and went hunting.)

Jeremy stares at him because 1.), no, and 2.)? Also no.

“How about this,” Jeremy says slowly. “You take that piece of shit car of yours and go back to your crew and I go back to mine and we pretend you did not just suggest what I think you did.”

Because, and Jeremy cannot emphasize this enough, no.

Even if he wasn’t Jeremy’s soulmate the answer would be the same. Jeremy’s an asshole, but he’s got limits. Lines he won’t cross and something like that?

No.

If he did have a personal grudge against the Fakes, well.

Honestly, there are only two things that would be part of that, and they’re both idiots. If something happened to them and the Fakes were involved...

Jeremy can’t say what he’d do then, but he likes to think he wouldn’t sink so low as to do something like that. (You never know what you’d do until you’re in that situation though, do you.)

There’s a long, long moment where they stare at one another, Jeremy’s heart beating double-quick time in his chest because Jesus fucking Christ. Also this sudden, violent urge to throw up because the whole soulmate thing on top of everything and how repugnant the matter of selling him out is with that factoring in?

Yeah.

Gavin laughs, tension seeping out of him as he regards Jeremy.

“Well,” he says, “that’s good to know.”

Like he really thought Jeremy could – would – sell him off like that even without the soulmate thing, Jesus.

“Yeah, sure.” Jeremy scrubs a hand over his face. “You’re welcome?”

Gavin hums, and then Jeremy feels a touch to the back of his hand and looks up to see him watching him.

“I never would have thought,” he says, and laughs like he’s still processing the whole soulmate thing. “I never would have thought you’d be the one.”

There’s...Jeremy swallows because there’s this note of wonder in his voice, the way he’s looking at Jeremy.

“Thought for sure I’d annoyed you past all reason.”

Not...not quite.

Annoying as hell, sure, but there was a part of him that appreciated watching a fellow horrible little bastard at work. Amused as hell at the way Gavin got under the skin of the others they were working with just because he could.

Yeah.

He should have known something was up then, but it was just a job at the time. Jeremy scrabbling to get by and just another job to put money in his pocket and all kinds of excuses that fall flat when he looks back on it.

“Nah,” Jeremy says, and smiles. “I mean, I wouldn’t say past all reason.”

He laughs to soften things, and is rewarded with a quiet laugh and then...it’s not awkward between them, just.

There’s.

“I should contact the others,” Gavin says, reluctant about it. “They’re sure to be worried by now.”

As if they wouldn’t have been the moment they realized something was wrong with a crew known to be as close-knit as theirs.

Trevor and Matt have to be worried about him as well by now, and the two of them can’t just hide away here forever no matter how tempting it is.

Should have gone their own ways the night before everything got complicated on them. Kicked Gavin out of the car somewhere his crew would be sure to pick him up before continuing on to the safehouse, but he hadn’t been thinking clearly.

Too late for that now, though.

“I - “ Jeremy sighs, because there’s no putting things off any longer. They’ve done enough of that as it is. “Yeah, okay.”

========

There’s not much for Jeremy to do as Gavin makes his phone call, but he finds reasons to be out of the room. Give him some privacy.

Wanders around straightening up for the next time someone needs to use the safehouse. Make a list of things he needs to get to restock the first-aide kit. Sends Matt a text letting him know he’s not dead in a ditch somewhere and he’ll tell them everything when he gets back home because he’d rather avoid Trevor’s heavy judgment for the time being.

He laughs when he gets a thumb’s up emoji from Matt, and then a few moments later a succinct Fuck you, man, that’s sure to result from Trevor expressing his disappointment in Matt for not pressing Jeremy for details.

Jeremy makes his way back to the living room just in time to catch the end of the conversation the Gavin’s having with whoever he called. All this exasperation to it and dumb little smile and he just.

Watches him for a long moment since Gavin doesn’t seem to know he’s there yet.

No telling what will happen once they leave the safehouse.

Jeremy’s got to be high on the Fakes’ most wanted list by now, and the smart thing for him to do is stay under the radar until that changes, if it will.

So. Yeah.

Gavin finishes his call and looks up to catch Jeremy’s eye, amused smile playing on his lips so so much for going unnoticed.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, just,” Jeremy shrugs. The safehouse isn’t big, not a lot of places for him to putter about while Gavin was on the phone.

Thankfully Gavin seems to understand that because he laughs, and Jeremy.

God.

He’s heard the stories, you know?

From his parents, other people who found their soulmates and had things work out. The way you just. It’s not some magical thing where everything’s suddenly easy, everything nice and clear and simple, but.

There’s a difference.

This thing where you look at your soulmate and you know.

Their smile seems brighter than anyone else’s, fills you with this. Love, warmth, whatever the hell that can help flip a shitty day over into one that’s a little more bearable. Small things that make life better in a million little ways, make you feel less alone in the world.

Not easy, and shit still happens, but it’s not. Not overwhelming anymore, like you know you can make it through a bad day and any others that come after it because someone’s there to help you through them.

Jeremy sits down next to him and reaches for his hand, feels stupidly relieved when Gavin reaches back.

========

In the end, Gavin gets in his Blista and drives back to his crew, and Jeremy watches him until he’s out of view.

Out of the two of them, he’s the one with the target painted on his back, and while Jeremy’s not delighted about letting him go alone, it’s the smart thing to do.

Jeremy’s a nobody compared to him, can find his own way home without worrying about running into trouble, and he does.

Gets an earful from Trevor who’s doing a good job of looking his usual put-together self, but Jeremy knows him too well by now to miss the signs of Trevor in full-on Deeply Concerned mode.

“Trevor,” he says, because goddamn they’re all kind of dumb. “Shut up.”

He drags Trevor into a hug despite his half-hearted protests – he is lecturing, Jeremy, and hugs are illegal you fiend. And then he does the same to Matt who’s off the side nibbling on a breadstick and trying to look bored and disinterested like he’s not just as worried.

“Where the hell were you?” Trevor demands, hands on his hips and ridiculous as ever. “We heard about what what happened, and then you didn’t come home and - “

Jeremy winces at the fear he can hear plain as day in Trevor’s voice even with the dramatics he’s throwing in to cover for it. The dark circles under his eyes and bloodshot eyes from a lack of sleep and just. Everything he can see mirrored in Matt.

“It’s a long story,” Jeremy says, which is the wrong thing to say even if it’s the truth because it sets Trevor off all over again with his own side of things.

Because Matt keeps tabs on Jeremy, on Trevor. Might as well have animal tracking collars on them or gone and microchipped them in their sleep. No way to hide from him even if they wanted to. (A lie, because they’d find ways around it, but what would be the point when he does it to look after them in his own Matt Bragg way?)

And when Jeremy dropped off the radar after the shootout with all the “extra touches” at the safehouse to prevent them from being tracked there...yeah.

“I, uh.” Jeremy doesn’t know how to put this gently, so he just goes for it. “I carjacked the Golden Boy and found out he’s my soulmate?”

There.

Perfect.

Good job all around, well done him.

Jeremy turns on his heel and power walks to the kitchen to grab something strong to drink while Trevor’s brain tries to process that and Matt stops choking on his breadstick.

While he’s there he decides to be civilized and grabs glasses for Trevor and Matt because he gets the feeling they’re going to need them.

========

Trevor can’t actually ground Jeremy, because for one, Jeremy’s a fucking adult? And two, he’s not the boss of him. (Something Jeremy thinks in the safety and privacy of his own mind lest he give Trevor ideas.)

But.

The three of them are in agreement it would be safest for Jeremy if he kept a low profile for the time being, which means he is more or less grounded.

Sits around the apartment pestering Matt while he works on whatever Matt does. Offering unhelpful suggestions until even Matt has enough of his bullshit and kicks him out of his nerd lair so he can work in peace.

Thinks about doing the same to Trevor, but Trevor is by far the smartest one out of them and voted most likely to plot intricate, painful revenge Jeremy will never see coming, so he doesn’t pester him.

Watches a lot of daytime dramas and talk shows instead. Some DIY videos from the internet on his laptop which is great, because he finds this one channel of a guy who helps him expand on his homemade explosives repertoire.

Also?

Picks up a few delicious recipes and other things from people not out to topple governments or just make really, really, questionable life choices involving explosives.

And then one day Trevor comes up to him with a package bearing the logo of a small delivery company.

He looks conflicted, like he’s not sure what he’s doing is a good thing.

“This came for you the other day,” he says, and holds it just out of reach. “I had Matt check it over first, just in case.”

Jeremy sets his game controller aside, because Trevor has a shifty look on his face. Is having a hard time looking Jeremy in the eye.

“Trevor?”

Trevor clears his throat, fidgets in a way that is very, very alarming coming from him.

“I realize I may not have come across as happy for you as I should have,” he says, waving a hand at Jeremy and his everything. “About this whole. Soulmate thing of yours, and I apologize. For that.”

Jeremy cocks his head.

While Trevor’s not wrong, he’s not. Jeremy knows him, okay. Knows Trevor’s glad he found his soulmate, but there was the matter of everything else to deal with too because Jeremy’s a damn idiot who can’t do anything the easy way.

“You really don’t need to - “ Jeremy starts to say, and snaps his mouth shut when Trevor levels him with a look. “But, ah. Thank you?”

Trevor harrumphs, scowl slowly lightening to a rueful smile as he holds the package out to Jeremy.

“Anyway, this came for you the other day and Matt says it’s not going to kill you. Or, it might, but if it does it will be from cancer due to long-term exposure to radiofreqeuncy radiation and not explosives or what have you.” Trevor pauses for a breath. “But as we both know, that won’t happen for decades if there really is a link between cell phone usage and cancer, so, uh. Yeah. Don’t worry about it.”

Jeremy doesn’t know what to say to any of that, so he accepts the package with a simple thanks and scurries off to his room before he catches whatever the hell Trevor has.

(Too late to avoid the insanity, but he already knew that.)

========

There’s a cell phone in the package, but Trevor gave that away with his unsettling warning about the hazards of cell phones or whatever that was.

There’s also a note.

From Gavin.

Awkward and sweet, and Jeremy laughs as he reads if for the third time because he’s an idiot and a sap.

It’s a chance to get to know Gavin better and a burner phone to make that possible.

Side note about this being for the best until Gavin can talk sense into his crew regarding Jeremy and this rambling tangent that has nothing to do with anything, but still makes Jeremy smile.

They’re getting further and further away from the bizarre Romeo and Juliet situation they were in at first, but everything’s still unbelievably stupid and ridiculous in their own way.

Still.

Jeremy sets the note aside and unlocks the phone and brings up the contacts. Stares at the only one saved for a long moment, nerves and whatever else getting the best of him for a moment before he shoves all of that aside and presses the send button before he can think better of it.

========

A month goes by before Trevor deems it safe to let Jeremy out on his own unsupervised, which is just as insulting as it sounds.

To be fair, it’s taken that long for his bullet wound to heal to a point he can take on work again without making things worse, so it works out.

He’s been talking to Gavin every chance he can get, gone from once or twice a week to three to four to every day thy better they got to know one another. Realizing they might be among the lucky ones to find their soulmate and someone they could stand to share the rest of their lives together with.

He’s been itching at the chance to see him in person again, and Gavin feels the same because he texts Jeremy the name of a cafe along with a time and date, and Jeremy -

“Good God man, you can’t wear that abomination on your little lunch date!” Trevor looks personally offended because Jeremy’s dressed in his finest Rimmy Tim ensemble, complete with a new hat to replace the one he lost in the shootout with the Fakes.

All shiny and white because he felt like a change was in order, and also they were out of brown.

Jeremy keeps a straight face by sheer strength of will, something not helped by the thumb’s up Matt’s shooting him over Trevor’s shoulder.

“What’s wrong with it?” Jeremy asks, looking down at himself like he’s looking for a stray piece of lint or wrinkled fabric. A loose button, something along those lines. And, “You don’t like it?”

Trevor makes this...this noise in the back of his throat that somehow conveys frustration, disgust, and barest touch of rage as he throws his hands up.

“You march right back into your room and find something to wear that isn’t both horrendous and garish right now, young man!”

There’s a delicate silence in the moment after his outburst.

And then Jeremy makes the mistake of looking at Matt, and that’s the end of that. The two of them crack up laughing while Trevor heaves this sigh of utmost suffering that comes from having to deal with idiots like them.

========

Jeremy changes into clothes Trevor deems far more reasonable than Jeremy’s Rimmy Tim getup and makes it to the cafe with time to spare.

Follows the hostess out to an outside seating area and can’t help the goofy smile on his face when he spots Gavin waiting for him at one of the tables.

He looks.

Well.

He looks nervous, fussing with this coin he’s rolling over his knuckles in an obvious nervous habit, but he also looks good.

Button-down shirt that makes his eyes stand out. Pressed slacks and dress shoes, hair – still an unruly mess but it’s more artfully messy rather than all-out disastrous. Those ridiculously expensive sunglasses of his hooked into the collar of his shirt and best of all, he looks rested. Like he’s finally managed to get enough sleep, and the smile that crosses his face when he catches sight of Jeremy -

Blinding.

“Jeremy!” he gets to his feet and pulls Jeremy into a hug, and the last of Jeremy’s nervousness vanishes in the face of his clear excitement at seeing him again after so long.

Jeremy closes his eyes and breathes out a sigh of relief as he hugs Gavin, because nerves and this...he doesn’t even know.

Like part of him somehow thought he’d imagined it all from the shootout to the carjacking (Jesus Christ, that’s going to make the story of how they discovered they were soulmates a tricky one to tell people) to the events at the safehouse.

The phone calls that had spilled over from one burner phone to the next until Jeremy had decided the hell with things and started using his own instead. (A risk, sure, of the Fakes finding him to “have a little chat with him” Gavin had warned him about when he told him, but more than worth it.)

Everything.

This ache in his chest at being so close and so far after all these years of wondering. Maybe there is something to the soulmates thing science can’t explain because it feels like Jeremy’s taking his first full breath in far too long.

The world feels a little more real, brighter when he opens his eyes to look at Gavin.

Something.

Gavin laughs again and they untangle themselves, sit down at the table Gavin’s gotten for them and stare at one another like idiots for a moment.

It’s a beautiful day, sunny and bright and the people of Los Santos are making the most of it. Pedestrians out for a walk for the hell of it or out and about on errands or other business talking on their cell phones or enjoying the break in weather from the spate of rain they’ve had the last week.

Dogs barking, birds singing. People laughing.

All of it paints a different picture of the city than Jeremy’s used to seeing and for a moment he can almost pretend it’s any other city.

Almost.

“Uh,” Jeremy says, because pretty as things are right now, Los Santos is certainly not any other city. “Did you know - “

Gavin rolls his eyes, mouth quirking as he leans towards Jeremy. Drops his voice to a conspiratorial whisper.

“Ignore them,” he says, gleam of amusement in his eye. “It’ll drive them mental.”

Jeremy raises his eyebrows at that because Gavin knows his crew best, of course, but still.

There’s a car idling at the curb just beyond the patio they’re seated at.

Shiny chrome number and the guy with the wolf on the back of his jacket Jeremy remembers seeing from the shootout behind the wheel.

Glaring at Jeremy.

Another car is parked across the street opposite him. Sleek black number with bright green accents. Too far to make out more than an outline of the driver, but Jeremy’s sure he’s wearing a skull mask. (He’s seen that car on the news too often not to know its owner.)

Not even two tables away from them are a pair of people in the absolute worst disguises Jeremy’s seen outside of a spy parody movie.

Dark sunglasses, fake mustaches and beards, and holes cut out of the newspaper one of them is reading along with oversize trench coats on a beautiful early summer afternoon in sunny Los Santos.

“...Okay?” Jeremy says, because okay.

And...he gets it, he does.

The Fakes are a close-knit crew and he and Gavin didn’t kick off this whole...soulmates thing between them in the traditional way.

At all.

To be honest, there’s a part of him that’s relieved they’re being this overprotective of Gavin. Watching out for him in an admittedly creepy way.

It’s just.

Weird as hell, too.

“Jeremy,” Gavin says, and gives him this look like he knows, but better to go along with it than fight it at this point, which.

Again, yeah, okay.

He can handle dealing with Gavin’s crew if it means he gets to have this...chance with Gavin. (Besides, he hasn’t even met Trevor or Matt, and God knows they’re going to be as terrible in their own ways, idiots that they are.)

They chat for a bit as they look over the menu, knot of worry and doubt in Jeremy’s chest unraveling as Gavin laughs at Jeremy’s stupid jokes. Smiles at the truly awful ones like he can’t help himself even though they both know how terrible they are.

Jeremy doing the same as Gavin tells him about his recent exploits with the Fakes, little adventures he got up to on his own when he managed to slip away from his minders. (Paranoid after the incident where some inconsiderate bloke carjacked Gavin.)

“Are you ready to order?”

Jeremy freezes.

Looks over to see a man dressed like one of the cafe’s waiters standing next to their table. Impressive mustache and tattoos he can see peeking over the collar of his shirt. More on his hands holding a notepad and pencil and this glint in his eye as he ignores Gavin to stare Jeremy down.

He’s seen the Kingpin on the news. Heard all kinds of wild stories about him, the things he did with the Roosters before coming to Los Santos to start his own crew.

Ruthless.

Merciless.

Only man in all of Los Santos who could get the Vagabond to join a crew and all the other rumors out there making him to be this terrifying figure in his own right, and for good reason.

And now he’s in a waiter’s uniform waiting to take their lunch order and Jeremy has no idea how to proceed, because his brain is having difficulty processing the situation.

Jesus.

He feels a sharp pain on his shin and snaps out of his daze or whatever the hell he’s fallen into to look at Gavin.

Gavin, who just kicked him under the table and is now giving him this look. All remember what I told you, and follow my lead and God’s sakes, Jeremy, don’t let them get to you, they can smell fear.

A lot to convey with a single look, but somehow Gavin pulls it off

“Actually,” Gavin says, looking back at his menu. “I was wondering if there’s any shellfish in the shellfish cioppino? I’m allergic, and it would absolutely ruin my day if I had even the smallest bite.”

That’s a blatant lie. They were just talking about Gavin’s love for shellfish after they got onto the topic of the east coast and Jeremy’s hometown of Boston in particular, but alright.

Jeremy stares at Gavin who lifts his eyes from his menu to wink at Jeremy before gifting their waiter with an arch look.

The Kingpin glares at him.

Takes a deep breath and in a voice that says he’s going to have words with Gavin later, and says, ”Yes, sir. Unfortunately there is shellfish in the shellfish cioppino as the name implies. Perhaps something else on the menu appeals to you?”

“Oh,” Gavin says, crestfallen that his first choice might kill him if he was in fact allergic as he’s claiming to be. “That’s a shame. What about the steamed mussels?”

It goes on like that for a while as Gavin asks about every dish on the menu where shellfish is a key ingredient and several where no seafood is involved at all.

The Kingpin goes from being annoyed to resigned and defeated, staring off into the middle distance as he answers Gavin’s questions.

“Well then,” Gavin says, when he’s done torturing one of the most feared men in Los Santos. “I suppose I’ll have the shellfish cioppino.”

There’s no reaction at first, but when the Kingpin realizes Gavin’s done tormenting him he snaps back to himself. Draws himself up to his full height and scowls down at Gavin as he angrily scribbles down his order to keep up the pretense as their waiter.

Gavin beams at him, hands folded neatly in front of him on the table.

The Kingpin snorts, corner of his mouth twitching before he turns his attention on Jeremy.

“And what would you like to order?”

He’s not glaring at Jeremy now, but it’s close enough to count.

“Hmm,” Jeremy says, mimicking the posh accent Gavin had slipped into. “Are there any mushrooms in your smoked mushroom ravioli? I have this allergy to them.”

No doubt he’ll regret it in the long run, but when he hears Gavin laugh figures it’s another one of those things he can deal with just for that.

========

They go for a walk along the beach after lunch, a nice leisurely stroll.

Sure, they’re being watched by members of Gavin’s crew, but Jeremy barely notices it anymore with Gavin laughing next to him.

“Oh, God, did you see his face?” Gavin’s giggling, all lit up with it, and Jeremy’s heart does that little flippy thing it started doing halfway through lunch with Gavin laughing and smiling and happy. “Geoff will make me pay for it, but his face.”

Gavin won’t be the only one paying for what they did, but that’s a future worry.

Right now it’s the two of them enjoying a nice day and being the horrible little bastards they are.

Amazing.

Their shoulders bump every so often, shifting sand under their feet and wandering along aimlessly as people are wont to do like this. Their hands do too, and after a while it gets to be a problem, so Jeremy has no choice but to tangle his fingers with Gavin to put an end to that.

Heart in his throat as he reaches for his hand, and that flippy sensation in his chest when Gavin slides a look at him, crooked grin on his face as he slides his fingers through Jeremy’s.

========

All good things end, or something like that, and Jeremy and Gavin find their way back up to the street next to the beach.

Gavin leads them to a pretty little thing parked next to the curb. Matte black and low-slung. Looks like it could go from zero to sixty in no time flat and Jeremy would love to see that happen one day.

He laughs when he notices Jeremy admiring it, hint of a blush on his cheeks as he gives it a fond pat on the hood.

“It was in the shop at the time,” he says, and shrugs, a story behind it he’s not telling Jeremy just yet. “That’s why I was driving my Blista.”

Jeremy raises an eyebrow because those stories Gavin told him earlier and his far from spotless driving record. Gavin coughs, gaze sliding away.

They lean against Gavin’s car and watch the waves roll in below them, sun starting to sink towards the horizon. They’ve shed their escort in Gavin’s crew, one by one until it’s just the two of them now.

Jeremy passing a test he wasn’t aware of or them getting bored enough to go off to wreak havoc in another part of the city, who the hell knows.

“We should do this again sometime,” Gavin says, light and casual, like he’s not holding on to Jeremy’s hand as though it’s a lifeline. “I had fun.”

Jeremy could do that. He could. Spend hours with Gavin without keeping an eye on the time.

“Me too,” Jeremy says, and squeezes Gavin’s hand. “I’d like that.”

Gavin ducks his head, and Jeremy laughs because.

Yeah.

The whole soulmate thing isn’t a guarantee you’ll fall in love the moment you meet yours, or that you’ll even like them, but goddamn is it nice when you do. (Amazing.)

After a moment Gavin looks up at him, expression on his face like he’s thinking hard on something, and then he breaths out this sigh. Annoyed at himself for something as he straightens.

“Jeremy,” he says, and he sounds determined. Focused. About to take a risk and intent on following through. “I think I’d like to kiss you.”

Jeremy bites back a laugh because it’s so formal of him. Right and proper and all that. Very British sounding.

“Yeah?” he asks, grinning at the annoyed huff from Gavin. “I think I’d like it if you did.”

Gavin’s eyes narrow because he knows Jeremy’s laughing at him, and try as he might he can’t hide his own amusement at their ridiculousness.

“Jeremy,” Gavin says, because this is no joking matter.

Jeremy tries to wipe the grin off his face, he does, but he can’t with the way Gavin’s looking at him and the way his heart is doing that flippy thing again.

Good thing, then, that Gavin does it for him when he leans in for that kiss of his.

========

Jeremy’s life isn’t all kittens and sunshine now, no.

Matt still has those debts of his that Jeremy and Trevor are helping him with because God knows he’s an idiot and things are getting better on that front.

Los Santos is still the same shithole it’s always been.

He’s still at the top of the Fake AH Crew’s most wanted list, albeit for a very different reason now.

But.

Jeremy’s found his soulmate and while the two of them have to deal with a few more hurdles in their path than most people do, they manage just fine for themselves.

“Gavin - “

Gavin laughs, pecks Jeremy on the cheek to shush him as the lights go down in the movie theater around them.

“Ignore them,” he he whispers, like Ryan and Michael aren’t a few rows behind them making sure Jeremy doesn’t kidnap Gavin (intentionally) under cover of darkness. “They’re just being ridiculous.”

“I - “Jeremy sighs, because Gavin’s got a point. “Okay.”

The Fakes like to show up on their dates from time to time, scowl and glare at Jeremy because they’re just “like that” according to Gavin, but they disappear after a while to let them have time to themselves.

More of a running gag by now than actual threat, even if Ryan still wears the mask half the time.

It’s weird as hell and definitely not the way Jeremy imagined what finding his soulmate would be like back when he used to think about it, but it works for them and that’s the only thing that matters.

#jerevin #ragehappy #fahc au #soulmates au #ahwuum #Prompt Fills #Kings of Nowhere #vagrant fic #thank you so much for supporting me friend!!!#<333333333333!#(...this is kind of what you asked for???#also it got out of hand on me #so there's that???#:D???)

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