#I have four!! I just got my fourth one yesterday

[theidiotwhowritesthings]

A Fresh Start [13]

Din Djarin x F!Reader

Warnings: sick child, medical procedures, anxiety, reliving past traumas, panic and fear about losing a loved one

Word Count: 3,439

Summary: When you made plans for your future they never involved being hired by a Mandalorian to baby-sit his adorable, green gremlin of a child. However, after your life fell apart in the span of one disastrous night, you found it to be the only feasible option you had left. Nevarro was a far cry from Coruscant, but the thriving community turned out to be exactly what you needed. Every day you spend in Nevarro you fall more and more in love with your new life, but when your past rears its ugly head you find that perhaps peace wasn’t meant for everyone.

A/N: HEY MY DUDES. THIS IS IT. THIS IS THE CHAPTER THAT INSPIRED IT ALL. I pictured the scenes in this chapter in my head, wanted to write it, but I knew in order to have the emotional impact I wanted it to have i had to build a full ass story around it and I did lolol.

Thanks to all who have shared their love! This is like my fourth update in four days but unfortunately that will slow a bit this weekend. I’m crazy busy this weekend so it might not be until next week that you get a real update.

Ch. #13: THE DANGER HAS PASSED, CYAR’IKA

Chapter Summary: You must relive your past in order to save your future.

“She was powerful,

not because she wasn’t scared

but because she went on so strongly,

despite the fear.”

-atticus

After deciding to go to the clinic, you paused only to tuck your blaster into the back of your waistband before sprinting out the door. It would take you at least fifteen minutes to get to the clinic, and that was if you ran the entire way. Hot wiring and stealing the neighbor’s speeder bike? That would take you two minutes top. A talent you had Tatooine to thank for. 

When you set Grogu in the speeder’s basket, so your hands would be free, he screamed. A mixture of unintelligible cries and ‘Ma’ over and over again. Hands trembling, you got the bike going and jumped on. It maybe wasn’t the safest to drive with Grogu in your arms, but you couldn’t bear to not hold him. The streets were bare of anyone and everyone. There had been no city wide siren for a warning, like Coruscant had, but the word about the pirates must have got around. 

Everyone was hiding.

As predicted, you got there in a quarter of the time on the speeder bike and when you reached the clinic you hopped off before it came to an actual stop. The bike ended up slamming into the clinic wall without someone to turn it away, but you were already halfway through the door. Just like the rest of Nevarro, it was bare. 

“Hey!” You screamed as you reached the empty front desk of the waiting room. “Daelar! Where the kriff are you!?” A woman, a young Twi’lek, poked her head out from around the corner. “You!” She jumped at your tone. “Get me Daelar right now.”

“He’s not here, ma’am.” She shook her head.

Whatever. You didn’t have time to chase that bastard. “Fine. Where’s the med droid!?”

“Broken.” She admitted. “If this is an emergency I can call a shuttle to take you off world.”

You felt the blood leave your face, your heart stopped in your chest, breath caught in your lungs. The words slipped from your mouth, aghast, “What did you just say?”

“Daelar left off world hours ago, and the droid has been malfunctioning since yesterday.” She repeated. “But I can…”

She was still talking. Her mouth was moving, but all you could hear was Grogu’s whimpering cries and a high pitched whine that filled your head⏤ as if a bomb had gone off and left you deaf to the world. Daelar left? He left off world knowing the droid was broken? Knowing that he’d be leaving all of this world without a healer? 

“How long for a shuttle?” You demanded. “How long to get to the⏤ How long!?”

“An hour tops, I would guess, but I cannot guarantee⏤”

“No, no, no.” You moaned. Even if that time estimate was accurate it was too long. Grogu was getting hotter and hotter, his cries getting weaker and weaker, and you hated the way his eyelids fluttered weakly. You shook your head. “Unlock the doors for me. I need to get back there.”

“I’m sorry. That’s for medical personnel only.” She replied. She set her hands on the desk.

“I don’t care.”

“Ma’am⏤”

Without blinking, you pulled the blaster out from the back of your waistband and leveled it at her. Her eyes widened in panic. Hands shot up in surrender. You chose to leave the safety on. You didn’t want to hurt this woman, but you weren’t going to let her stand in your way either.

“Here’s what’s going to happen.” You seethed. “That door will be unlocked, I will have access to the medical supplies, and I am going to save my son. This is going to happen regardless of the decision you make right now, but it’ll be easier for all of us if you help.”

She nodded once and you lowered the blaster. The Twi’lek hurried to the side door and you followed her. She used her hand print to open the door into the emergency medical bay. The large room had four cots in total, and the side wall was made up entirely of glass cabinets where you could see supplies and ingredients. You quickly set Grogu on the closest cot and the fact that he didn’t even react to being set down sent a sharp strike of fear through you.

“Hey, what’s your name?” You shouted back at the girl while hooking up Grogu to the vitals machine.

“Aayla.”

“What’s your training?”

“I’m⏤I’m new to this. I’m a tech.”

No official medical training, but a tech would be helpful. You pointed to her, voice clear and loud, to get your order heard. “Aayla, get four ice packs. I want one under him, on top of him, and on either side. I need to cool him down quickly. Understand?”

She nodded and turned to the supplies to get the ice packs. The vitals machine began to blare, and your head snapped back to look at it. Heart rate was much too fast, even for Grogu who ran high naturally. His oxygen level was hovering on the lower end of normal. His temperature though⏤ Maker⏤ it was 102 degrees and you watched in horror as the decimal point next to it changed from 3 to 7. It was still steadily rising. 

The sound of his whimpers, the blaring of the machine, you felt stuck. You were trapped in that moment once more watching Soran die. You shouldn’t have been her physician. It was too personal.

This was so much worse.

Aayla returning with the ice packs was what snapped you back to reality. You were scared, terrified, but you couldn’t afford to be. You swallowed every ounce of it and forced yourself to move. You needed to act. 

You had told Din it was normal for parents to panic, but you couldn’t.

Your next movements were a blur of muscle memory. It didn’t matter that this clinic was unfamiliar to you. Training kicked in and you moved like a woman possessed. Fluids first. You grabbed a bag and set it in the cooler before returning to Grogu with IV gear.

“Aayla.” You sent her to the supplies and called out all the materials and supplies you would need to compound the medicine. While shouting them out, you began to attempt to start an IV on Grogu. It wasn’t easy. His arm was small, his veins smaller. It took you three tries before you finally got it in. Aayla had brought over all the items requested and you sent her for the fluids you set in the cooler. “Clip it in, and hang it.”

Aayla confirmed the order and you stepped aside to begin to work. You needed an antipyretic first. The rising fever was the most dangerous aspect of Grogu’s sickness right now. Any higher and he could start to have seizures⏤ any higher and his body could shut down. Anxiety crawled up your spine and latched to your mind. It had been so, so long since you compounded anything. What if you messed this up? No. You didn’t have time to doubt yourself. Go with your gut. Trust yourself. 

When you added the last ingredient the liquid turned from clear to an electric blue and relief flooded your body. Aayla watched intently as you hurried back over and connected the vial of antipyretics to a medigun. You pressed the clean needle to Grogu’s outer thigh and pulled the trigger. All of the liquid disappeared and you set the gun aside.

 “How do you know how to do all this?” Aayla gasped.

“I’m a doctor.” You answered mechanically. 

Now, you needed an antibiotic. Same process. Different ingredients. You wanted to cover as many bugs as possible, go as broad as you could, and then once Grogu was stable the coverage could narrow to something more specific. It took you about the same time to make the antibiotic and when the liquid turned the shade of purple it was supposed to be you rushed back to Grogu’s side.

Aayla held up the medigun when you went to search for it and you realized she had replaced the needle with a fresh one and sanitized the entire thing. You thanked her and injected this one into Grogu’s opposite thigh. Fluids. Antipyretics. Antibiotics. That was all you could do. 

Now, it was out of your hands.

Din’s entire body ached, and he was exhausted. The only reassuring thought being that the fight was over, and he could go home. Home to Grogu. Home to you. As much as he still wanted to have that talk, he wondered if he could convince you to hold off until tomorrow. All he wanted right now was to crawl into bed with you and his son in his arms. Granted, he might need to have the talk before inviting you into his bed again. Details, details. Din just needed to get home, and you’d have a plan⏤ you’d know what to do.

 Clearing the rest of the ex-Imperial base had gone very well. When only two pirates were left standing they both surrendered. Din figured this could be used to their advantage. Pirates were hardly the loyal kind. A little squeezing and they could possibly find where Gorian Shard liked to hide. Granted, that was more along the lines of a bounty hunter’s thoughts than a Marshal’s. Din chose to come back with Mayfeld and Cara to shove the two pirates into the cells. They could be dealt with in the morning. 

“Good job today.” Din grunted, already moving toward the door, “Stay home tomorrow. Rest. I’ll work the shifts.”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” Cara scoffed. “We can still come in.”

“Uh, speak for yourself.” Mayfeld chimed. Din was halfway down the hall when Mayfeld called out for him. Din’s feet came to a stop and he heaved an audible sigh. This really was the day that would not end. “Boss man! Seriously! Get in here now!”

Din jogged back, happy that his helmet wouldn’t show just how annoyed he was right now, and when he re-entered the room both Cara and Mayfeld were crowded around a holopad. Cara glanced up and the look on her face filled Din’s stomach with lead. “An intruder alarm was set off while we were out. From the clinic.” Din’s entire body stiffened. No. He was jumping to conclusions. You promised you’d stay in the house, he called Daelar to go to you. There was no way you and Grogu could’ve been there while someone broke in. “You should see this.”

Mayfeld flipped the holopad around at her words and Din’s eyes focused on a security feed. A young Twi’lek girl stood behind the front desk with her hands raised in surrender while a familiar figure wielding a familiar blaster aimed the end at her chest. Din would recognize your voice anywhere, in any setting, at any time. Even with the security feed adding in a garbled white noise under it all, he knew your voice.

“⏤supplies, and I am going to save my son. This is going to happen regardless of the decision you make right now, but it’ll be easier for all of us if you help.”

He lifted his gauntlet to check his communicator link. What was going on? Why hadn’t you called? His eyes widened when he realized the circuitry in his vambrace was dead. No, no, no. He slammed his other hand into it as if that would miraculously fix it, but it stayed dead. The taser. Dank farrik. He should’ve been paying attention. Din had lost contact with you hours ago and was only just now realizing it.

Din spun on his heel and took off down the hall in a sprint. Cara and Mayfeld were calling out to him, he could hear footsteps following, but he didn’t pause and wait. The clinic was right down the road. He needed to get there. Din needed to be there⏤ now.

You had pulled over a stool and sat by the cot’s side. One hand resting on the half melted ice pack on Grogu’s belly and the other holding his tiny hand. Then you waited on baited breath. Aayla was moving about the room, cleaning you thought, but all you could do was stare at the young boy who looked so small on such a large cot.

“Please, please. Oh, Maker, please.” You mumbled the pleas under your breath⏤ willing the universe to bend to your will. Grogu was your first patient since Soran. If anything happened to him you wouldn’t survive it. You barely survived losing Soran. Kriff, it could be argued that a part of you didn’t. You watched Grogu’s chest rise and fall. ‘Please, please, please.’ You were pleading⏤ begging. If you thought it would help you’d get on your knees and scream at the sky.

Finally, the machines chirped and when you looked up from Grogu to read the numbers you saw his temperature had fallen two full degrees. Your lower lip quivered, relief slamming into you, and it took all your strength to not crumple to the floor.

Din barreled through the clinic’s doors⏤ hard enough that he accidentally shattered the glass as it slammed into the wall. The Twi’lek he had seen on video popped her head around the corner with wide eyes. She held her hands out.

“You’re the Marshal.” She shook her head. “I’m sorry. I hit the alarm because a woman came in⏤”

“Where is she!?” He barked.

“This is a misunderstanding. I don’t want to press charges⏤ she’s actually a doctor and⏤”

“Where⏤”

Cara slid in behind him and blurted. “That’s his son and wife. Let him through.”

The girl nodded in understanding, and Din couldn’t even spare a thought toward the title Cara had given you. The clinic worker pointed through a set of double doors and Din stormed past her without another second of hesitation. The back room was filled with cots and shelves of medical supplies.

Sitting in the corner though, he saw Grogu lying on a cot with an IV in his arm and connected to the machine on the wall. Din didn’t recognize all the numbers and symbols, but they were all written in a neutral green rather than a dangerous red. Right by his bed, you were perched on a stool with your hands holding onto Grogu while your head rested on the cot. At the sound of his arrival into the room, you lifted your head and your eyes widened. Din rushed toward you and you stood up so fast the stool fell to the floor. 

“He’s okay now. He’s stable.” You blurted. “Daelar never brought me the⏤ the medicine. Grogu spiked a fever and got worse, I tried to call⏤”

“My communicator broke. I’m so sorry.” Din leaned over the cot and cautiously ran a hand over his son’s head. Grogu didn’t look sick right now. He just looked like he was sleeping. Snoring softly without a single cough. “The fever⏤”

You spoke up. “It broke maybe twenty minutes ago? It’s normal now. All his vitals are. I gave him antipyretics and antibiotics for whatever infection he has. He’s stable.” Din let out a sigh of relief and he bowed his head to lightly tap against Grogu’s. Your voice shook. “He’s stable.”

Din slowly lifted his gaze to look to you. You had never looked so small before. Panic and fear still shone bright in your eyes despite the air of confidence you were trying to push out. Your arms were wrapped around your own body. Din took a step toward you and you flinched. 

“Cyar’ika.” He whispered. “It’s okay.” You nodded once⏤ swallowed hard. “You said it yourself. Grogu is stable. He’s safe.” Your lower lips quivered and he watched you bite down on it. Din took another step and held his hand out to you. “You saved him. You. You did this⏤ you saved him.” Tears collected in your eyes and you lifted your gaze to the ceiling as if to avoid looking directly at him. Din knew you must have been a storm of genius confidence just like he saw you last night. He had seen the video of you holding a stranger at blaster’s end to get the supplies you needed. Din also knew that sometimes it was easy to take action, grab ahold of the danger, and let your body act while your mind took a backseat. Instinct took over. When that happened, it was hard to slip back into reality. To relax. “It’s over now. The danger has passed, Cyar’ika.” Din set his hands on your arms. “Talk to me.”

Your eyes snapped to meet his and those collected tears streamed down your face. You shook your head, voice shaky and pained, “I was so scared, Din.” 

He was already pulling you into his chest at the same time that you leaned into him. Din cupped the back of your neck, squeezing in reassurance, as you buried your face in the crook of his shoulder. You sobbed into his neck⏤ tears soaking into his cloak. He whispered that everything was okay and his words slipped out in Mando’a out of habit. Din added in Basic. “You did so good, ner kar’ta.”

“I was so scared I was going to mess up.” You clung to him so tightly. As if he was the only thing anchoring you here. “He was so sick and I⏤I haven’t done this in so long. I was terrified⏤ He⏤If he⏤ If he died⏤” Din didn’t even like thinking along those lines. You suddenly pulled your face away from him, but Din wouldn’t let you get far. He kept you caged in his arms. You shook your head. “I⏤I didn’t want him to end up like Soran.” Your words came out between harsh sobs. “I didn’t want to be the reason somebody I loved died again.”

If Din wasn’t the kind to pay attention then your words would have been nonsensical. However, he knew you were hiding from something. He knew you had a past that led to a terrible injury. And he knew your name wasn’t Soran. The way you screamed it out that night he woke up. Plus, half the time when he called out to you using that name you never answered. Din got more response from calling you ‘Cyar’ika’. He knew all of this, he just didn’t care. Who you were didn’t matter to him. You mattered to him. You in this moment. You in his arms.

Din tore off his gloves, something he’d never do outside of the safety of his ship or home, but he needed to touch you. He needed you to feel the warmth. Din cupped your face tenderly, using his thumbs to swipe away the lingering tears. He leaned forward and pressed his forehead softly to rest against yours.

“I don’t know your history, I don’t know your past, but here’s what I do know.” Din spoke slowly, enunciated every single word so it would be seared into your mind. “You are an incredible woman. Smart, beautiful, brave⏤ You never cease to amaze me, and there is nobody in this galaxy that I would trust Grogu with over you.” The words rang true as they left his lips. It wasn’t a simple comfort. It was a declaration. “Every single day I leave my home, I know⏤ without a doubt⏤ that I am leaving Grogu in the most capable hands other than my own.”

“Din…” You breathed.

Maker, he wanted to kiss you. It wasn’t a desire born of lust. Not this time. Din wanted to press feather light kisses against every inch of your face. Use his lips to brush away your tears, to stop your lip from quivering, to chase away your fear. Never, in his entire life, had his helmet felt like such a restriction to him. A wall of beskar keeping him from bringing you the comfort you needed. The comfort he wanted to give.

“I trust you, and all tonight does is prove that I was right.” Din said. “You saved Grogu. Not me, not anyone else. You.” You took in a slow breath, the first steady one he had seen from you since he got here, and he felt his entire body relax at the sound. “Thank you. Just thank you.”

“Don’t thank me for that.” You replied. “I’d do anything for him. Anything, Din.”

“I know.” 

“I’d…” You paused. Your eyes closed and Din found himself missing the color. Even for the brief moment it was missing. “I’d do anything for you too.” Your eyes opened once more and the panic and fear had faded. Leftover tears clung to your eyelashes, but he was staring into eyes he recognized⏤ eyes filled with so much kindness and care that his knees felt weak. “I love Grogu and I… You…”

Din nodded and pulled away from your face so he could tuck you into his chest. His arms wrapped around you as he set his head atop yours. Din needed to feel more of you. He ran a hand up and down your spine, “You’re important to me as well, ner kar’ta.”

For the first time since he left the house this morning, Din felt at peace.

mando’a translations

Cyar’ika: Darling, sweetheart

Ner Kar’ta: My Heart

[darth-mortem]

This is a fifth chapter of my COD fic "At the Crossroads of the Worlds" translated by @g8se.

Task force "141" was sent to clean up a secret laboratory, the research of which was financed by states recognized as sponsors of terrorism. The soldiers broke into a bunker located in the Caucasus Mountains on the Russian-Georgian border. At first, everything went according to plan, but after the fighters split up, Ghost came across a strange room, the door of which locked automatically the moment he was inside. Without knowing it, Simon Riley had set off an experiment that had been brewing here for years, and now he would have to be very strong to finally return home.

First chapter | Second chapter | Third chapter | Fourth chapter

Chapter 5 of 6. 826 words (it's small, but important)

Past character death, angst, action, secret lab, experiment, parallel worlds

August 18, 2016. Temporary base of TF 141. Iran. Zagros Range. Coordinates classified. Experiment status: concluded. Subject has completed reverse transportation. Reality LW414/2016.

“So, when you woke up, he was already gone," Captain Price summed up, glancing at Lieutenant Riley, who nodded. "Well, I hope he made it home in one piece. Although I can't help but admit, I was somewhat hoping he'd stay. A soldier like him would be a nice addition to the 141.”

"And I never properly thanked him," Sergeant Sanderson shook his head. "He saved my life."

"I'm sure he knows everything you could say or do," Captain MacTavish spoke, his tone also tinged with sadness.

All four fell silent, sipping their coffee and puffing on cigarettes and cigars. Then Johnny got up, extinguished his cigarette, and left the room. Simon watched him go, stayed for a minute or so, then got up and followed suit, determined.

Roach glanced at the door, then turned back to Captain Price and tilted his head slightly to the side. The captain only shook his head, as if to say he had no idea what was going on, then got up, collected the cups, and carried them to the kitchen.

Simon found Johnny just where he had been talking to Ghost yesterday. MacTavish was hiding from the sun in the shadow of a shabby building, casually twirling a lighter in his hand, not in a hurry to light up. The lieutenant approached as quietly as ever but intentionally stepped on some debris to announce his presence.

"Oh, it's ye, Simon," Soap turned at the sound and smiled. "Well, I can ca' ye Ghost again. Ye dinnae like it when people use yer real name."

"I want to talk to you," the lieutenant said, ignoring MacTavish's remark. "There's something I need to tell you."

"I'm listening," Soap dropped the playful tone and looked at Ghost with some concern. "Is something wrong?"

The lieutenant took a deep breath and clenched Captain Riley's tags in his hand through his clothes. His resolve wavered, but he gathered his courage quickly, not wanting to back out completely, and blurted out:

"I like you!" Then, after a moment's thought, he added more softly, "Not as a commander or a fellow soldier, but... differently."

"I like ye too," Johnny replied calmly, and a smile returned tae his lips. "Actually, I've liked ye for quite a while. I just dinnae want tae say anythin' because, well, ye know... ye're a bit... no yersel' lately. I dinnae want tae upset ye, ken?"

"Yeah," Simon nodded, then stepped closer.

MacTavish cautiously placed his hands on his waist and pulled him closer, ready to let go at any moment. Riley, however, didn't try to break free or resist. Quite the opposite, he wrapped his arms around Johnny's neck and looked into his eyes.

"Lift yer balaclava," Soap requested. "No all the way, if ye dinnae want tae. Jist a wee bit."

Ghost remembered his older double’s tale of struggling to trust and how much time he lost with his Johnny because of it; he remembered Captain Riley calling him beautiful. Anxiety clenched in his chest, his heart quickened its pace, but the lieutenant overcame himself once more, took hold of the edge of his balaclava, and pulled it up completely, tucking the piece of fabric into his pocket.

Johnny's eyes widened in surprise. Then he raised his hand and gently stroked Simon's scarred cheek before tenderly and passionately kissing him.

They didn't have time to savour this newfound connection between them. Captain Price received the information they had all been waiting for, and 141 began preparing for departure. The pilot double-checked all helicopter systems for the last time, the soldiers gathered and donned their gear, as well as what the mysterious visitor from another world had given them, who had managed to become a good friend to all of them. Sitting in the cargo hold and heading towards a new objective, which might lead them to Makarov and allow the soldiers to redeem their names, Gary brought up Captain Riley again. They exchanged a few words, and then Simon, holding the MX25 on his knees, spoke with sorrow in his voice:

“He helped all of us. It's just a shame we won't be able to do anything for him.”

“Hold on, Ghost," Captain Price objected. "We know that certain people and events in our world and his are identical. We know when his MacTavish died. We know where and when in his world that lab was built. So what if we can still help him, just not now, but later?”

“Later for us, but not for him!" Johnny caught on to the thought, rubbing his palms.

“2030?" Roach smiled. "Well, that's not too far off. We'll make it.”

“We have to make it," Riley said seriously and reached his hand downwards.

MacTavish covered it with his own, then Price and Sanderson joined in. Having sealed their promise, they settled in more comfortably and switched to discussing current affairs. A new battle awaited them, one they simply couldn't afford to lose.

[bewitchingivy]

pac ; reminding you why you're so amazing

Welcome to another pick a card by yours truly! I really loved doing a reading for this topic, I originally planned to read four piles, but when I got to the fourth one; the messages that I got were just repeating the ones that were already dealt with in the previous piles, no matter how many times I shuffle, so I decided to leave it at three. So generally, the purpose of this pick a card is to remind you how amazing you are, to remind you why you should love and appreciate yourself, but there's also gonna be some short messages about how you should care for yourself right now and a channeled message from a love one. Gosh, I really hope that you'll feel good about yourself after reading your pile <333

methods used in this reading: intuition, tarot, music.

࿐ DISCLAIMERS:

Tarot or any forms of divination is not set in stone. It’s not your only future, but a probable one with the current energy you have right now. If a reading doesn’t resonate, simply let it fly away and shift your energy. Because you can change your reality, and you have the undeniable power to do so.

Please keep in mind that my readings are for entertainment, positive, or inspirational purposes only. Please don’t take them as a professional or medical advice. Any actions or decisions taken are your responsibility.

The images I use in my blog are not mine unless I say so. The pictures belong to their respectful owners.

Enjoy your reading! <3

pile one

How to care for yourself right now: have fun and feel young. Don't ignore your inner child. Do the things that you've done when you were a child, or do the things that you've always wanted to do but have never done it when you were a child. Don't be afraid. Don't hinder the child in yourself.

To you who's chosen the first pile, I would like to start off by saying that you should be proud of your mind. You're a curious person; you always ask questions and you always strive to learn whether that be flipping through pages in a library or keeping your eyes and mind open by learning and accepting the lessons you could learn in your life. You're witty, creative, and never doubt any idea you have. In fact, I'm hearing right now that you're being advised by your spirit guides that whatever idea you have in this current moment, go do it. Don't second guess yourself. You're a lively and charismatic person. You have a charm and aura you carry around that bring people in and warm them like the comfort you'll have when sitting by the fireplace. You have the power to bring love and positivity into your loved ones lives, and you should know that even though you haven't heard this from them, they're really grateful to have you in their lives. Remember that. Last but not least, you are resilient. Your strength and your will to never give up on whatever you're doing is very admirable. You have gone through so many storms, but you're still here standing tall and proud for the things you have overcome and learned. You have grown wise and stronger than you were before. But you seek to constantly grow and learn, asking yourself to become more better than yesterday. Smile. Because I believe—and you should too, especially you—that whatever storm you'll face next, you can overcome it just like before.

A short message from a love one (anyone, but it was my intention to channel from someone from your soul family): You're not alone. You shouldn't be afraid to ask for help too. It's completely okay. You know I'm always here for you, I'm not going anywhere. You'll always have me. Even if we're physically apart, my spirit is always watching over yours; encouraging and comforting you when you need it. I'm sure you feel that sometimes. Don't forget how worthy you are.

Clues to who this person is: a grandmother/godmother, father/father figure. Your spirit guide. An older brother, an older male friend.

Shufflemancy: Only The Young by Taylor Swift

Take care of yourself, and remember that you are an important and loveable human being! Feel free to leave a feedback 🫶🏻 — Ivy

Check out my masterlist for more!

pile two

How to care for yourself right now: Whatever creative project/passion/hobby you have on right now that you're thinking of postponing/abandoning, don't stop it. If you're feeling overwhelmed or anything by it, set it aside for a while and give your mind some rest. But don't quit.

To the person who's reading this, you are someone who's a great leader. You inspire people around you and you are willing to help someone in need. You are talented, even if you don't see it, but others see that in you. I'm seeing that there is something that you're particularly talented/skillful at—if you are doing something creative like I mentioned above, then this message particularly applies to you that you are skillfull in that field. Don't you dare let your doubts/insecurities stop you from continuing. You should know that you are trustworthy, and when you are in leadership, people look up to you and trust you. You will do/are doing something in this lifetime that helps people. You're setting a good example in your community. You are a kind and open minded person. You accept imperfection and see it as beauty because you understand that nothing and no one in this world is perfect, and that's what makes it beautiful. You are a highly courageous person. But just like everyone else, you get scared over something. But you are determined and you push on even if you are afraid which makes you fearless. You're well aware of your strengths and weaknesses, and I am proud of you for accepting yourself for who you are. You have done well and will continue to do so.

A short message from a love one (anyone, but it was my intention to channel from someone from your soul family): Take breaks when you can, love. Remember that. Your body needs some rest, and you need to listen to your body. Be healthy. Start eating healthy, eat your fruits and vegetables, and don't always eat out. Be mindful of what you eat.

Clues to who this person is: a platonic/romantic soulmate that you haven't met yet. A best friend who “acts like a mom,” you know that kind of friend who reprimands their friends for not taking care of themselves, heh.

Shufflemancy: Lego House by Ed Sheeran

Take care of yourself, and remember that you are an important and loveable human being! Feel free to leave a feedback 🫶🏻 — Ivy

Check out my masterlist for more!

pile three

How to care for yourself right now: Ground yourself. Be in the present moment. Your mind has been everywhere, the past and the future, but you haven't been focusing in the now. Breathe and look around you. Be still and be at peace for a moment. Do some meditation.

The people who have chosen this pile are very intellectual and intelligent. I shouldn't be surprised that all the cards that came out right now are swords. You guys might not even consider yourselves or you don't believe in yourselves a lot. Don't underestimate yourself, you literally have no idea what you can do and make possible with your mind. You can even make manifesting so effortless. But you won't be able to unlock all your potential if you doubt yourself, therefore you should start opening your eyes and see how powerful you are. You are also very intuitive and psychic, you don't need to seek answers outside yourself because it is already in you and you know it better than anyone else. To anyone who's reading this, you should know that your ideas are spectacular. You should give yourself more credit. You are very clever. You are a mastermind (you gotta listen to Mastermind Taylor Swift, because that just came up to me.) And when you promise something to anyone or to yourself, you are true to your word. You are responsible and you hold so much respect to yourself, and other people will see that in you therefore they will start respecting you too. You are a planner. And when you have something to do, you always work hard to complete it. You never give up. You grit your teeth, but you keep moving on. Keep going, because you're doing well.

A short message from a love one (anyone, but it was my intention to channel from someone from your soul family): Honestly, don't take life too seriously, you deserve to have some fun too. Go out and have fun with your friends. Celebrate that you are alive with the people that you love. Don't be in hurry, just enjoy the ride. Take your time, alright?

Clues to who this person is: a group of people in your soul family, they are/will come into your life as your friend group.

Shufflemancy: Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana

Take care of yourself, and remember that you are an important and loveable human being! Feel free to leave a feedback 🫶🏻 — Ivy

Check out my masterlist for more!

[p0rchc0ll4ps3]

If I don't figure out a lot of minute worldbuilding details about the disco elysium universe I'm going to explode

A 50 cent euro coin fell out of my pocket yesterday and when I picked it up I got this insane need to fucking draw currency

And architecture. God I want to draw architecture. Cityscapes. Food???? Economy. Fuck man. I need to grasp the culture I need to know it you can't have such extensive politics and factions and countries and cities and have NO MAP and NO PRESENTATION OF DIFFERENT ARCHITECTURAL STYLES OVER TIME AND WHAT COUNTRIES THEYRE INFLUENCED BY and NO FOOD. AT ALL

god imagine if they had to take breakfast lunch and dinner breaks. If I could see the fucking menu and the fucking prices. What's the minimum wage???? Can people afford to pay for shit or is it in crisis????? What countries went into debt after the war??? What's the taxation like?

The world feels so fucking real to me and it's so fucking magnetic and I'm obsessed with it it's like one of my favorite fucking characters in this game so far and it PAINS me that I can't fucking VISUALIZE IT bc there's so many DETAILS I want

God the technology. What corporations are there. What about the monopolies. What regulations? What corruption? R they fucking the environment? HOW POLLUTED IS MARTINEISE? How polluted is the world?????

How global os the economy? Do they get products from other countries? They do they get radios from seol. R the factories in other world countries

They mentioned FOURTH WORLD countries

I'm just. Fucking. Losing my mind there's SO much here and it's just barely BARELY tangible and it's driving me batshit

Also if anyone comments please no spoilers I'm only on day four!!!!! The game has barely started picking up yet for me

[dreamwritesimagines]

I have a feeling that Bucky has had a crush on Charm for a long time and the main victims of it have been Becca and Steve. Becca because she gets drilled with questions after every night out at breakfast and Steve because he has had to hear about it for years:

Bucky, pretending not to care: so, how did she get home last night? The driver said he only dropped you off.

Steve, who can already see where this is going and its barely 7am: You uh- you talked to the driver, Buck?

Bucky: We chatted.

Steve: At four am? I-

Bucky: Anyways. Bex?

Becca, still wearing her club clothes and sunglasses at the table, glitter all over and half convinced someone poisoned her coffee (no one did, she's just hungover): huh-

Bucky, trying to appear nonchalant but it's not fooling anyone: how did Charm get home?

Steve: Buck, c'mon, she's a big girl-

Becca: Liam dropped her off... I think. Are we sure this food is safe? I feel sick.

Bucky: Whatever. What the fuck is a Liam?

Becca: A friend. I really think we should-

Bucky: whose friend? At what time? What was the car number-

Steve, who has been in this exact same situation ever since the girls started to go clubbing: Bucky, I think we should let Becca get some rest.

Becca, who wishes Steve were her brother but is also currently swaying on her seat: That's a great idea-

Bucky: She will as soon as she answers some questions- this Liam kid, is he safe? Haven't heard that name before so he can't be from one of the families... is this a school friend? Don't tell me it's a guy from the club.

And that's the fourth time that Becca throws up on the table and the third that Steve helps her get to bed.

OMG OMG DARLIIING😍😱❤️

I’m so going to fangirl over this and you because THIS IS ABSOLUTELY AMAZING 😍

So first of all, you are incredibly talented! 😍 This scene is so good, like I need this to happen, I’m so taking this as canon 😂❤️

Steve going like “At four am?” with a completely exasperated expression because it’s too early in the morning 😂

Becca, still wearing her club clothes and sunglasses at the table, glitter all over and half convinced someone poisoned her coffee (no one did, she's just hungover) HELP, THIS IS SO BECCA-

What the fuck is a Liam? There are Kill Bill sirens going off in Bucky’s head for sure 😂

whose friend? At what time? What was the car number- HE’S FIRING QUESTION AFTER QUESTION, I CAN’T-😂

Steve, who has been in this exact same situation ever since the girls started to go clubbing Oh Steve needs a painkiller, fast😁 He will whine to Sam about how Bucky’s all braincells stop working as soon as Charm is mentioned 😂

Awww Steve being so nice to Becca, that would be their whole dynamic! ❤️ It’s so sweet! ❤️

Omg my loveeeee, this made my whole day, I will read this over and over again! 😍 Thank you so so much, ILY! ❤️

Also since your wonderful scene inspired me, now my mind is full of this trio, Bucky relentlessly asking questions, Becca totally not paying attention and Steve facepalming 😁 It would happen like every Sunday breakfast, because they probably all have breakfast together as a family and Steve is always invited ❤️ So Bucky would clear his throat and go like,

“Becca.”

“Hm?”

“So I was by Stark’s territory yesterday-“

“Why? It’s miles and miles away.”

“I had things to do there, it’s not important.”

“Is this why you ditched me and Sam? We had a meeting and all I got was a text saying you were busy?”

“I was busy. By a total coincidence, I saw Charm there and-“

“Oh yeah she mentioned she had this date there.”

“…Date?”

“Becca. Becca no, don’t do this to me.”

“She was having a date with that asshole?”

“Oh you’ve met him?”

“No. No, it’s just- he looks like an asshole.”

“Great. Now this is going to be the only thing I’m going to hear for the whole week, thanks a lot Becca.”

“What-I said nothing!”

“Who the hell is that dude?”

“We met him at the club last night-“

“At the club?!”

“Yeah. I think he’s a-“

“No. No no, some dude from a club? He cannot be trusted, also he’s not even that good looking, go tell her that.”

[humanitysstrongestsoldier1]

𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐃𝐋𝐔𝐒𝐓. | 𝑍. 𝐾𝐸𝑁𝑃𝐴𝐶𝐻𝐼 x Reader

TW: violence, blood, stitches, battle, cursing, explicit sexual content

AO3 LINK!!!

"Rage, love, lust, on fire." - ODETARI, NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER

I was walking back to squad 4 after healing some injuries of the men from the skirmish that happened yesterday. However, some idiots decided to block my path and try- keyword try- to flirt with me. Unfortunately, they weren't good men, they were men who thought I couldn't fight so I proved them wrong. Lurking in the shadows was the Captain of Squad 11, Zaraki Kenpachi, who loved the smell of bloodlust seeping from my aura. He too, wanted a fight, an honourable one.

____

Notes:

Kenpachi may be OOC a bit. Since I am a new writer, this was the most explicit smut I have ever written in my life- atp even god can't save me 💀

PS : I feel like Pachi smells like lavender cuz like u know the colour of squad 11 is like a lavender-purple, idk man just a headcanon🤷

_______

The heat of the summer in the Seireitei was getting to me, and I was sweating my ass off. Tending to the wounds of those two-bit wannabe captain soul reapers had ruined my mood for the day. My captain, Unohana-sama, had stationed me in the barracks of Squad 11 to tend to the injuries of members who participated in the small skirmish that happened yesterday. It was definitely not fun, mostly due to the men ogling my appearance. Unlike most soul reapers, I did not wear a traditional Shihakushō with long sleeves; instead, it was cut short and covered my shoulders. I did wear a haori over it, but due to the summer, I opted not to today. I also had some buttons opened to let my body breathe. Most of the men who were staring me down were quickly shut down by a simple flex of my muscles; my biceps were not playing, and they were begging to be wrapped around someone’s neck to hear the crack.

 Ugh, what was I thinking? If my captain heard my thoughts, she would definitely shut them down, reminding me that I am now a healer and no longer a warrior or even a scientist. I continued walking down the alley and saw a group of men approaching me. I rolled my eyes at their snickers and giggles—they sounded like a group of middle school girls around their crush.

"Hey squad 4 bitch!" One of them yelled out as they got closer.

I was now trapped by four men who were staring me down like I was a piece of meat. I arched my eyebrow and looked at them, beckoning him to continue.

"Women from Squad 4 seem to be very skilled with their hands; wanna prove that to me?" One of them said, his crooked teeth and unruly eyebrows made me want to gag, but out of professionalism, I kept my calm.

"Hey, bro, it would be easy to just bring her with us; it's not like she can fight back; she's just a healer." The other said this while smirking, while keeping his eyes on my breasts.

With a small smirk, I finally spoke up: "What makes you think we of the 4th squad can’t fight?"

"You are healers; you probably can't even punch for shit, hell even-"

I cut him off right there and sent a hard punch to his nose. He went flying back and caused the dirt to cloud around us.

"Can’t punch for shit eh? How's that?" I said, grinning at the pool of blood forming around him. "Maybe that ‘weak’ punch fixed your crooked ass teeth." I said, quoting the ‘weak’ part with my fingers.

"Why you little bitch!" One yelled out, lunging for my neck.

I was too proud to pull out my Zanpakuto, so I blocked him with my bare hands. The other two tried lunging at me while I was occupied with the first, but they failed due to my legs kicking back and twisting around them. I changed my stance to an offensive Melee-style fight. I focused my strength on hand-to-hand combat and lunged at the three. Luckily, the fourth one that I punched was knocked out, lying in a pool of his blood. I laughed at their pathetic excuse of a battle and immediately released some of my spiritual pressure, causing them to buckle and kneel at my mere presence.

I chuckled at their horrified expressions. "You call yourselves Squad 11 warriors? How disgraceful. Now if you wish to die by my hands, I would happily comply; if not, then get your sorry asses up and run while you can."

Not even a second passed, and the three picked up their knocked-out friend and ran for their meagre little lives. I noticed the lurking figure watching the battle in silence a while ago, but I didn't speak to him until now. I knew who it was—the captain of the 11th.

"How long are you going to stand there and gawk, Captain?" I said, smirking at his shadow. "How come you didn't stop your men from attacking a woman like me?"

"I was about to step in, but after that punch, I knew you got it. Who are you, woman? And why aren’t you in my squad if you are so strong?" He said this, stepping out from the shadows and standing in front of me.

"(Surname) (Name), Captain Unohana Retsu’s first line of defence, scientist, and ex-soldier." I said, holding my head high to meet his dark eyes that seemed to pool with desire—a desire for battle. I know that look because, back in the day, I had those same eyes.

"First line of defence? Ah, you must be that girl who was that weirdo’s researcher in squad 12." Captain Zaraki said, grinning.

"By weirdo, I'm assuming, Mayuri-sama. Yes, I was head of microbiology research." I answered.

"So a scientist, healer, and warrior, or ex-warrior? Why refer to yourself as that?"

"Captain Unohana said to leave my warrior mindset behind because I’m now a healer. The only time I can truly show myself is when the 4th Squad barracks are attacked. Since I'm the first line of defence, my job is to destroy the intruders and protect the people. Or, in certain instances like this, where I am surrounded by rapey-looking men," I answered, scowling at the thought of the peasants who dared to speak to me earlier.

Captain Zaraki hummed at my answer, acknowledging the logic behind it: "You have a cocky look to you, darling. Yet, you still hold respect to refer to people with proper dignity."

"I'm not a beast, sir." I give my respect to those who have earned it. And you have earned it with your battle prowess."

"Test that respect." He declared.

"Excuse me?" I was honestly puzzled by his statement.

"Fight me and test me to see if I deserve your respect. If I lose, you can call me as you like."

"I think it's highly inappropriate to fight a captain, and I'm not supposed to." I responded quickly, trying to persuade him.

"Fight me; it's an order, woman." He said it with a small growl.

"I know this isn't about respect; you want to fight me because you're bored."

He chuckled and said, "I live for battle, sweetheart, and I enjoy a good fight more than anything. And you are bringing some fun into this summer."

"Please, captain, this is highly unprofessional. I can’t-"

Before I could finish, she had already pulled his Zanpakuto out and swung it at me. Without missing a beat, I immediately ducked and went behind his large frame.

"Please sir! I can't break my rule. Unohana-sama will-"

"I’m attacking you, aren't I? You are not breaking any rules; you are defending yourself. Bring your sword out and fight me, woman!" He cut my pleading off and turned to swing at me again.

I pulled my Zanpakuto, Homura, out of its sheath and blocked his swing, grimacing at his brute strength.

He laughed maniacally: "There it is, darling, that look in your eyes! That bloodlust!  Come on!"

"Tch, you are killing me here, Captain Zaraki!" I pushed him back with my sword and grinned at his shocked expression at my strength.

"Oh yes, I'm going to have so much fun with you!" He lunged back, grinning.

I manoeuvred my way around him, blocked his futile attempts, and cut some of his back and chest in the process. He was coming at me nonstop, and I was getting tired and sweating even more because of his great strength. So I decided to put an end to this fight. I pulled away and placed my sword horizontally in front of my face.

I let out a breath. "Kokoro O Moyase, Bankai: Homura Suryastra!"

Searing flames surrounded the blade and the area surrounding the attacker. Colours of red, orange, yellow, and blue burst from my aura. I immediately lunged at Captain Zaraki while he was busy looking at the beautiful flames. His guard was down, and I kicked the back of his knees very hard, punched his gut, and caused him to kneel. I asked Homura to relax the flames while I pointed the sword at his neck.

"Had enough Zaraki-taichou?" I teased, smirking at his kneeling form.

He looked up at me with blood spilling out of the corner of his mouth and said, "For now, yes, for life? Never. Oh, how I wish you were in my squad; I would never let you go."

My cheeks reddened either from the heat of my Bankai or from the words of the man panting and smiling at me.

"A deal is a deal. Speak my name without the honorifics; you deserve it." He praised her, standing up.

"But I can’t possibly—" I tried exclaiming before he cut me off with a sharp look.

"Okay, Kenpachi." I spoke his name softly, liking the way it felt on my tongue. "Please allow me to heal your cuts; it's the least I can do."

He nodded and ushered me to follow him to his private quarters.

_______

I stood behind Kenpachi, stitching up one of the deeper cuts I made. I apologised to him earlier for cutting him up, but he said that he took his scars as memories of great battles. He urged me to only stitch him up so he could relish the experience of the fight.

I ran my fingers over the stitched-up wound and felt his chiselled back tense at my hands. I mumbled a quick apology and moved up and off the engawa to stand on the grass in front of us. I stood between his legs and found the gash on the left side of his chest. I grabbed the antiseptic and dabbed it on the cotton before placing it on the wound.

He hissed at the feeling and wrapped his large hand around my waist, pulling me closer to his chest. My hands were fisted, and they rested on his collar bones.

"Sorry, it always burns." He groaned.

"It's alright; I don't quite like the feeling either."

He didn't push me back or remove his hand from my waist; he just waited for me to continue. So I did. I pressed the cotton again, and he winced at the burning sensation, squeezing my waist slightly. To console him, I bent down and blew some air at the burning wound. His muscles relaxed, and I started stitching him up once more.

A gentle silence blessed our presence, and I sighed, "You're all good, Kenpachi."

He hummed and removed his hand from my waist. "(Name), what do you feel when you fight?" He randomly asked, trying to entice a conversation. He removed his strapless eyepatch with a grey border and awaited my answer.

My cheeks slightly reddened at the use of my name: "Umm. I would say it was a thrill. Like a rush of adrenaline and pleasure. I always win. So it's an absolute blast watching them fall to their failure."

He shifted his eyes around my face and did not respond to my question. I met his eyes, and I saw a familiar look. The look of desire. But not the one that I saw when we fought. No. This one was different.

"Kenpachi? What’s wro-" My question was shut off.

His large hands wrapped around my neck gently and pulled me to his level. His warm lips met mine, and my eyes widened at the sudden action.

I pulled back and said, "Kenpachi, this isn't right!"

He smirked and yanked my arm to pull me forward. His arms grasped the back of my knees and wrapped my legs around his toned waist. I gasped at this movement and looked at him.

"Why is it not right?" He asked, smirking slightly.

"Well, because I-I-" My words weren't coming out because I couldn't think of an excuse.

"Hmm? Tell me (Name)." He whispered.

I didn't respond.

Kenpachi chuckled. "That's what I thought, princess. I’m going to ruin you."

His hands grabbed my chin and brought my face closer to his. His lips met mine once again, and this time I didn't object. I wrapped my hands around the back of his neck, moved my lips with his, and sighed into his touch. His warm tongue slipped into my mouth, and the kiss got deeper and much more passionate. Being a tease, I bit his bottom lip, to which he growled and moved back.

"You are going to regret that, baby." He whispered in my ear.

His hands went to the back of my head and pulled my hair back to give him more access to my neck. His lips bit, sucked, and kissed every area he could find on my neck. He found one certain spot, and I let a breathy moan out. He smiled against my neck.

"Pachi please-I-"

"Say it. Say it, sweetheart."

"I need you."

He growled and immediately got up, lifting me with him and connecting his lips with mine once more. He walked away from the garden and closed the shoji door with one hand. My lips didn't stop moving with his. I wanted more and more of this man.

He walked towards the bed and laid me on it before pulling back and attacking my neck once again. His hands unbuttoned the rest of my uniform and removed the top. His lips met my chest, leaving his art behind, sucking and licking at my skin. One of his hands went behind my back and unclasped my bra. He ripped it off of me, and I moved my hands to try to cover my chest.

He stopped me and said, "Don't you dare, woman. I want to touch and see all of you."

Kenpachi's mouth moved towards the top of my left breast, leaving a dark bruise behind. His tongue slipped out and licked the peak of my hard breast. His lips latched on, sucking, biting, and tugging on the sensitive flesh. My hands tangled in his mid-length hair, pulling every now and then. One of his hands moved to the other breast, kneading it and swiping his thumb on the nipple.

"A-ah~ Pachi, please." I begged him to give me more.

"Patience, baby, I want to feel every inch of you." He whispered against my skin, moving his lips down my naked torso.

He pulled down my pants and threw them on the floor before moving down and leaving kisses on my inner thighs. His thumb brushed my clothed pussy and I moaned at the feeling.

He grinned and said, "Fucking hell, (Name) you’re soaked." He moved his head between my thighs and swiped his tongue upwards on my clothed warmth. My hands immediately grasped his hair, and I sucked in a deep breath.

"Want me to clean you up, love?" He whispered, his lips ghosting over my black panties.

"Mmm yes."

He swiftly pulled my panties off, and his tongue met my clenching cunt. The tip of his tongue met my swollen clit and he moved it around, causing me to moan and writhe below him.

"That's it, pretty girl, fall apart for me." He groaned before latching on to my clit. He sucked hard. Pain and pleasure clouded my mind, and I pulled at his hair and closed my thighs around his head. His room was full of unholy sounds, but Kenpachi most likely thought of them as music to his ears. His lips pulled away from my bundle of nerves before he lowered the tip of his nose so he could tongue my entrance once again. He ran his wide, flat tongue against my core. The heat of his mouth felt so good at my core that I felt myself clenching at nothing.

Taking note of this, Kenpachi slipped two of his fingers inside of me easily. "Look at that, pretty. You take me so well; you want all of me, love? You want my cock? You want me to fill you up?"

I quickly nodded without any hesitation; my walls pulsed under his thick fingers.

"I want to hear you say it, darling. Don’t shy away now. Where did all your fighting go, eh?" He said this while thrusting his fingers upward and curling them to brush against my spot.

"Please pachi! I need- fill me up; I can't- please i need you in me." I looked at his lust-filled eyes looking up at me, I begged him to fuck me, to make me see stars,

"You ask so nicely, princess." He whispers while pulling his fingers out. My cunt clenched at nothing, begging to be filled once again. Holding my jaw, his mouth smashed into mine, again distracting me from his action of removing his trousers. I was met with the taste of my cunt lingering on his tongue, and I was getting more and more impatient, writhing for his cock in me.

Reading my thoughts, Kenpachi rubbed his hardened length against my core, spreading my legs even more. His tip teased my clit and I dug my nails into his back, which he groaned lightly at.

"Careful, don't pull my stitches." He said this while he continued teasing me.

"Kenpachi, please stop teasing me i- ahh~" My pleading was cut off by the feeling of him lining up against my aching hole. 

"You want this pretty? You want to be fucked senseless, my little warrior?"

I nodded, struggling to bring the word ‘yes’ to my mouth.

"Say it. You want my cum in you, baby?" He prodded, trying to get me to beg even more.

"Yes! Kenpachi, please paint me white. I swear I’ll do anything."

He chuckled and said, "You are just perfect for me, aren't you? A strong woman who can bring me pleasure in battle and in bed."

I hummed at his praising words, moaning now and then at the feeling of his tip at my pussy. "Yeah," he rumbled, sliding his seeping head slowly to me. "Yeah, that’s it."

I felt the stretch of him inside me, and I bucked my hips, trying to get more of him. He laughs: "Impatient, aren't we?"

Kenpachi pulled back before sliding into me so fast that I couldn't help but release a scream. He sat fully inside of me, stretching my walls out as they clenched around his length.

He grumbled into my neck, "Pretty little pussy. Hm~. All mine. Mine to breed. Mine to fuck."

My nails scratched the muscles on his back as he slowly started thrusting. I locked my legs around Kenpachi's waist, the stretch of his girth becoming more and more heavenly. He let out a groan at the feeling of the tightness. A loud moan left my lips as he went even deeper, his hands gripping my waist so tight that it would likely leave bruises.

"So g-good, Pachi, please, moree-" I breathed out, pleading.

"Yeah?" He groaned, smirking, enjoying the view of me begging.

He moved. Harder. Faster. With every thrust, I jolted, and another lewd noise left my mouth. I was seeing stars as he fucked the living hell out of me. His fingers moved to my sensitive nub, rubbing to try and get me closer to my climax, all while reaching for his as well. The stimulation immediately made me clench harder around his cock, to which he responded with a groan. He buried his face in my neck, kissing and leaving bites while still moving.

"Say my name. I want the entire Seireitei to hear it." He whispered on my skin.

"Ken-Kenpachi!" I yelled, feeling a knot form in my stomach. His name echoed off the walls of his room.

"Yes-yes, that's it; you're so perfect, my little warrior. Mine. Mine. Mine." He growled, his thrusts becoming more erratic.

Taking my lips into his own, we came at the same time, moaning into each other's mouths and muffling the unholy sounds. His seed coated my walls, making me feel so full. He kept thrusting, helping me ride out my high. He pulled out, and I shivered at the feeling of emptiness. Kenpachi gently moulded his lips with mine; I nibbled on his bottom lip, and he pulled away with a gentle smile. He took in my flushed cheeks and blissful expression before kissing my forehead. He moved down to look at the flesh between my legs, smiling at the mess.

"You look so pretty like this—more prettier than when you fight." Kenpachi whispered while kissing my inner thighs. "I’m stealing you. You're mine now."

I chuckled at his possessiveness and ran my hand through his jet-black hair. "How can I go anywhere? You said it yourself: we are perfect for each other. However, I do need to get back to Squad 4 barracks; my captain is waiting for me."

He groaned and cursed under his breath before lifting me over his broad shoulders and saying, "Not yet. Let's take a bath, then you can go."

I couldn't resist, so I ended up taking a nice, warm, lavender-scented bath with him. Kenpachi helped me get dressed and led me outside, walking with me to the gate of the 11th squad barracks. My legs were on the verge of failing, and I was sore, so Kenpachi wrapped an arm around my waist on the way there.

He kissed the side of my head, his lips ghosting over my temple. "Come over tonight. I’m not done with you yet."

My eyes widened, and I nodded my head as he chuckled at my reddened face. He gave me one last kiss, and I walked out of the 11th Squad area.

~~~~~~

I hummed a song while walking through Captain Unohana’s quarters.

"That happy? Was healing those men really that fun?" I turned to the voice to see Captain Unohana smiling at me.

"Umm, I-yes captain!" I said, standing tall. She hummed and walked past me, asking, "Is that so? You smell like him, (Name). Lying to your captain isn't a good thing."

My eyes widened, and I tried to explain, but she was already gone. I sighed and continued walking to my quarters for a quick nap. I plopped on the bed, staring up at the ceiling and smiling like a madwoman at what just happened with Kenpachi. If showing my bloodlust would cause him to fuck the daylights out of me, then I would show my bloodlust every day.

That night, when everyone was asleep, I did end up going back to Kenpachi’s, looking for more and more of him, whilst he happily obliged.

End Notes:

I am an absolute whore for this man...the things i would let him do to me are so unholy i could never post it anywhere

GIF AINT MINE!!!

[notyour-valentine]

a charlotte blurb on the day of her birth?

A blurb is supposed to be short, right? Well, rambling old me failed - here's a oneshot instead. Thank you so much for asking. This was fun to do especially since the circumstances of her birth will play into the main storyline massively. This was written as part of my crossover series Welcome to Downton, Mr. Shelby

"Lady Grantham's fourth daughter"

Cinncinati born Countess of Grantham has given birth to another daughter, making the fourth. [The Earl of Grantham, Robert Crawley then Viscount Downton, married on February 16th 1890 to Miss Cora Levinson, only daughter of Mr. Isidore Levinson, and now has four daughters: Mary, b. 1891; Edith, b. 1892; Sybil, b. 1895; and the present infant. As yet there is no son and heir to the Earldom.

The door was what woke her, the slightest clinking of the lock. Or maybe it was the renewed warmth that came from the foot of her bed.

They came almost every hour, to make sure their beds were warm enough, and that the fireplace was still crackling. 

Rubbing her eyes, she sat up, glancing first at the slight gap between the curtains. 

Outside was a wall of white. Like yesterday. And the day before that. And the week before that, and the month too. 

It didn’t even have to have snowed again. Whatever had fallen since before Christmas just remained there. Perhaps they could go sleighing, she thought, but only if it was all over. 

Maybe it was already over. 

Glancing to the other side of the room, she saw Edith still fast asleep, her golden curls spread on the pillow with her teddy clutched in her arms. 

And the door to the baby’s nursery, Sybil’s nursery, was still shut, keeping Nanny within. Well, not infinitely, so Mary decided to take her chance while she still had it. 

Exchanging her woolen night stockings for her slippers, she reached for her robe. It was pale blue and wonderfully fluffy, but not as warm as usual, since she got up before the maids had a chance to warm it. 

Holding her breath, Mary confirmed that Edith was still asleep, and the Nanny still with Sybil next door, before she slipped out into the corridor. 

The light coming from the entrance hall confirmed what the gap in the curtains had told her. It was already morning. The judgment was sealed by the front door opening. Anthony, one of the footmen entered, his face hidden behind a thick woolen scarf, rushing in first before Bes slipped through.

“No, no Bes - the carpet!”, he called after the dog who was leaping up the stairs before either he or Carson could catch her, wagging her tail and spraying droplets of molten snow everywhere as she went to greet Mary, rubbing her icy cold nose against her palm and wrist. 

“Good morning, Milady.”, she heard Carson say, having come up from the entrance hall. “Are you up already?”

“Yes.”, Mary said, building herself up to her full height and looking at his dark eyes and black hair. 

“May I go see Ma- Lady Grantham?”, she asked. Fräulein Kelder had scolded Edith just last week for referring to their parents as Mama and Papa to staff. She wouldn’t make the same mistake now. 

Carson was kind enough to ignore her fumble. 

“I’m sure she will be delighted to see you, just not yet. I’m afraid Lady Grantham is still very busy.”

Mary sighed deeply. “Still?”, she asked. 

Carson stretched out his hand and she took it, allowing him to take her back to the nursery. 

“Your grandmother is with her, as are the doctors from the hospital. She is in the best of hands, I assure you.”

Mary couldn’t help but frown. Her mother had been so absent-minded in the last few weeks, and everyone was so restless. 

“That she is!”

They both turned to see her grandmother standing in the corridor. She had been staying here for the last two weeks, since the roads were practically frozen and she wanted to be close to her mother. 

“Good morning, Granny.”; Mary said, offering her a smile. 

“Yes, morning to you too, dear.”, she said in a rush. “Carson, I think it would be wise for the girls to take their breakfast downstairs for a change, and that they be allowed to play games in the salon or library.”

“Breakfast downstairs for the gir-oh yes, yes of course.”

Whatever it was, it had taken Carson a moment to realise, but he then jumped at the chance to hurry them all out of the nursery, and downstairs. They were met on the steps by maids carrying jugs of warm water and more towels. 

The only time they were allowed to eat breakfast in the dining room was when they had a birthday or on Christmas Morning, so it was a rare treat, sitting in the big chairs, with Carson there and not just the nursery maids. But Mary found herself glancing up at the ceiling. 

Treat indeed…Mary scoffed, but she didn’t know what to ask, or how, so she just watched. 

Downstairs it was just as warm as upstairs, with all the fires lit, the curtains half drawn even during the day and added pillows to keep even the slightest ghosts of air out. And candles, candles were everywhere Sybil couldn’t reach them. 

Over their winter dresses, Fräulein Kelder made them all wear extra cardigans to be sure, with Sybil crying and fussing until Bes made her forget all about it. 

Since it was too cold to take their morning walks, they moved some sofas in the library to give them space to run and play, as well as ringing down all sorts of games from the nursery. 

But Mary didn’t want to play. She couldn’t hear what was happening upstairs, but she had counted the times people rushed up and down the steps, paid close attention to whomever came in and who whispered to whom. 

For a while there had been mad rushing, up, up, up, always up, some down, but mostly up, and always in great haste. 

Then, one by one, people were making their way down. Slowly, without any rush. Without any haste. 

“It’s over.”, she said under her breath, so quietly only Edith could hear. “What do you mean?”, Edith asked.

“Mama.”, was all Mary said. 

“You don’t know that. They haven’t said.”

Mary didn’t need them to tell her, she knew. They reason they were sent downstairs, the rushing of the maids, the haste of all those that took the stairs, and the calm descent. 

But why weren’t they telling them?

Her stomach tightened in knots. Sybil was too little to know, and Edith too stupid to understand. 

Luckily, she at least kept Bes busy so she wouldn’t give her away again, especially as Sybil had yet another outburst at the scratchiness of her cardigan and put a right fight up against Nanny and Fräulein Kelder.  For the second time that day, Mary saw her chance and she took it, slipping through the door to the hall and sneaking up the stairs, making sure to keep her head low so no one would see her from below. If they weren’t going to tell her, she was going to go and find out for herself. 

The bust of King George III, or rather the cabinet it was displayed upon, was her greatest ally as she snuck to the bedroom her mother had moved into. It wasn’t her usual bedroom, but one closer to the stairs. 

Mary was about to knock when she heard her mother’s voice. “Robert was so sure.”

“Men are always sure.”, she heard her grandmother answer. “And then they are wrong.”

“Wrong about what?”, Mary asked, pushing the door open to enter. 

“Mary!”, her grandmother scolded, but she didn’t care. Instead, she looked to the bed. 

Her mother was pale, and she looked like she hadn’t slept much, but then again she had been tired in the last few weeks anyway, resting up against a good dozen white pillows. 

Beside the bed was the crib, the same one Sybil had been in, and Edith, and Mary and Aunt Rosamund and Papa and all the other Crawleys before him probably, and inside, was a baby. 

It was sleeping, with red lips slightly parted. There was nothing much to see but the squished face babies had, and the bundle it was wrapped up in. There looked to be nothing amiss with it. It was sleeping just fine. And if the baby was fine and her mother was fine, there was only one thing that could be wrong. 

“It’s a girl.”, Mary said, turning back to her mother and grandmother. 

“Yes.”, her grandmother said. “It’s a girl.”

But it was supposed to be a boy. 

When she reached her mother’s bed, she sat down on the edge and took her hand. 

“Are you sad, Mama?”, she asked. 

Her mother took a deep breath and offered her a small smile, but it wasn’t a real one. Her mother didn’t smile small smiles. Sometimes Granny said that was what made her so American. 

Her own hand came to cover Mary’s, warm and soft. 

“It’s not what we all hoped for.”, she said, her blue eyes shining. 

Yes, Mary thought, a boy would have been better. A boy would have been an heir. 

“Well,”, Granny said with her usual decisiveness as if she was a judge in a sentencing, “there’s no changing it now.”

Within three long strides, she had crossed the room to stand behind Mary. 

“You are well, and you have delivered a healthy daughter Cora. There is reason for gratitude in that too.”

Her mother took another deep breath, glancing at the crib. Mary’s eyes followed her gaze.  A baby. A sister. Another one.

At least she wasn’t screaming, and that was something at least.

~

Thank you for requesting!

[witchcrafting-kitten]

One Muffin After Another

Pippin Took x fem!reader

Trigger Warnings: use of she/her (?); fluff; use of y/n

A/N: I thought it might be fitting to write an autumn themed fic given it's the season. Plus I thought it'd be really cute to do one with Pippin in it. Apologies for it being on the short side.

"These smell so good! Are you sure I can't just have one?" Pippin looked at y/n with those big puppy dog eyes of his.

Y/n and him had spent yesterday afternoon gathering ingredients for pumpkin spice and apple crumble muffins. The two of them had promised to make them for an autumn festival the following day. Pippin wasn't the best baker, but he knew how much she loved it, so he always tried his best.

"No! You've already had about four of each behind my back," y/n shook her head as she stuck the fourth batch of apple crumble into the oven to start working on the fourth batch of pumpkin spice. "I don't hear or see you doing a lot of helping, Peregrine Took."

He got it all prepped and sorted, she was the one with the magic hands. He would check on the oven and wash the dishes, she would make them all look perfect. The time passed by slowly at one point and fast at another during the whole day. Y/n was content when the two of them were finally done. Pippin just had to keep his hands off of them till tomorrow.

An autumn breeze kicked off the festivities and Pippin couldn't stay away from y/n's muffins as she suspected. Having a good time was something that made him happy, but it was always happier with y/n to enjoy with him. There were other Hobbits in attendance who dug into some muffins as well [Pippin knew better than to eat the whole lot on everybody, not when he could help y/n make some any day, any time].

The End

Hopefully this turned out kinda cute. That was what I was trying to aim for, but I've been a little out of sorts with fic writing at the moment, so... almost like a writers block adjacent.

[imonlyhereforthexreaders]

by four and a half lengths (part 2)

Thomas Shelby x reader

length: 2075 words/ 3.5 pages single space

summary: after an initially favorable interaction with the infamous thomas shelby, the reader is blindsided by a seemingly malicious decision only to find out that it may not have been exactly what it seemed.

a/n: hello darlings and dears, here’s part 2 of a series that i’m really enjoying at the moment. as usual dont be afraid to send your love and criticism my way i thrive with the attention. also lmk if you want to be tagged for future parts! as always, be gentle with yourselves.

----

Following the conclusion of the final races owners and trainers alike gathered for an informal cocktail hour to celebrate placings. With the Catalpa Downs races being regarded so highly within the racing community it was an achievement to have even had a horse running, so even the biggest losers of the last couple days showed their faces proudly for having qualified and competed. The gathering was held in the large outdoor pavilion just beyond the stabling area in the late afternoon. After giving Damascus his evening feed and double checking he had fresh water you made your way over to the already bustling party. With all races having been won cleanly and without major upsets, spirits were understandably high. You accepted a flute of champagne before spotting just the man you were hoping to see.

  Richard Boyd was an old timer in the racing industry who, although not much of a trainer, was responsible for the importing or breeding of the majority of the most successful race horses in Great Britain. So while the horse of his that you were interested in, Saint Clement, may have placed fourth, he had run three other horses in the same race who had placed first, second and sixth so he was understandably in good spirits as he gestured wildly to another man in the midst of telling a story. When he finally turned from his conversation to spot you he smiled widely and motioned for you to join him.

“How good to see you, Miss (l/N)!” He greeted, with an enthusiastic handshake. Richard was someone who didn’t concern himself with the politics of racing so the issue of your sex didn’t concern him in the least. You had a solid racing record and were known for treating both your horses and your staff with the utmost respect which in turn made Richard a big fan of yours and a big supporter of your career. “I saw Damascus yesterday, he just looks better and better with every race” You smiled proudly at the compliment. Although Damascus had not come from Richard, his breeder was one which Richard frequently worked with. “He’s got a great mentality,” you agreed, “he runs great on the grass as well. His shoulders are so upright that he sinks a bit on sand turf but these grounds have been perfect for him” Richard laughs heartily and gives you an affectionate pat on the shoulder. “You’ve got a great eye (y/n)” he compliments, running a hand through his greying hair “have you added any new blood to your barn that I should keep an eye out for?” “Actually, that’s something I wanted to talk to you about” you admitted, “I saw Saint Clement had a sales ribbon in his tail today and was looking to see if I could take him off your hands.” “I actually did have you in mind when this one started training, he’s got the French bloodlines on his dam’s side that I know you like” you nodded in agreement having already researched his pedigree beforehand, “Unfortunately I was approached earlier today and already sold him to another gentleman” You tried and failed to hide your surprise. It wasn’t unusual for offers to be put in at social events such as these on horses that didn’t win, however it was strange that Richard would accept the first offer without waiting to hear from others. This told you whoever had bought the horse had paid a pretty substantial sum. “Can I ask who the buyer was?” you inquired in a hushed tone, knowing that early sales like this are usually kept quiet. Richard in turn leaned in, eyeing around the room suspiciously. “Thomas Shelby” he nearly whispered “I knew he was involved in racing, he ran a horse against yours yesterday, but I wasn’t aware he was trying to expand it” you nodded, encouraging him to continue. “I didn’t really want to sell to him, I don’t want my name associated with whatever shit he gets up to in Birmingham but he made an offer I couldn’t refuse without offending him and that’s something I wanted even less” Richard revealed, taking a step back with a deep breath. “Well if he’s running horses here that at least means he’s running clean races these days” you offered weakly, knowing that while he may be able to fix races in Birmingham, Catalpa Down was a whole different animal. Richard nodded in agreement, mouth pulled into a straight line in thought. “That’s true, sorry I couldn’t make this one work out for you, lass. If I see another one that looks like your type I’ll give you a call. I plan on heading to the states at the end of August to find some to import so I’ll keep an eye out.” 

You thanked him before he got pulled into another conversation with another trainer. Finishing your champagne you make your way to the small bar area, plopping down on a stool. You tried several times to flag down the bartender only to have any man who approached the bar get priority over you. After having already been moderately pissed about losing the opportunity to buy Saint Clement after you had opted to stay an extra day at the races just to watch him run, this was just the icing on the cake.

“What are you trying to order?” asked a familiarly gravelly voice beside you. You turned to find Thomas leaned against the bar beside you. You didn’t even bother hiding your scowl, he was the last person you wanted to be seeing right now. “You bought the horse out from under me” you accused, not caring that you were bitching at someone who in theory could have you disappear off the face of the earth. You opened your mouth to say more but were interrupted, “Can I get you anything sir?” the bartender asked Thomas. If you were angry before you were now fuming. “What would you like, love?” Thomas implored with a smug smirk seeming unbothered by your noticeable rage. You clenched your teeth so hard you could feel the blood pumping in your temples. “Two old-fashioneds” you finally manage with a tight lipped smile. The bartender, sensing the tension, offers a curt nod and runs off to prepare the drinks. “Kind of you to order for me” Thomas quips, leaning further against the bar to see over your cold shoulder. “They’re both for me Mr. Shelby, you can go kick rocks” You snarl, sneaking a glance at him to find even at your rude remark that he only smirked further and raised a curious eyebrow. His indifference was pissing you off but then again so was everything about him so you decided to air your grievances. “I know this is not your wheelhouse Mr. Shelby, I’m fully aware that racehorses are not your largest concern in life but what you did was unprofessional and also quite honestly a stupid move.” He nodded along to your explanation, “And why was it a stupid move?” He inquired, tilting his head with that signature stony expression. You turned to face him fully, “You bought a horse that runs middle of the pack in his current training program. I know you can easily afford any trainer in England and they can probably get that colt to finish consistently in the top three. However, they will not try to train him the way that I will. I know what to do with this horse to make him sweep the competition but you don't, and neither will whatever trainer you hire. Saint Clement could be great but you haven’t got the faintest idea on how to get him there.” You explained, albeit a bit pridefully. The bartender returned with your drinks, placing one in front of both you and Tommy and you made a point of pulling them both in front of you, raising the first to your lips, gauging Thomas’ reaction over the rim of the glass. “That’s why I intend to hire you to train him” Thomas stated matter of factly, expression not changing as you choked a bit on your drink. “Excuse me?” you wheeze out, still coughing the old fashioned out of your lungs. “I own all of the horses that I train, what makes you think I’d suddenly change my business model to work for you” You ask in confusion. All of Thomas’ previous smugness had vanished from his face, he was 100% serious in what he was saying. Although you suppose most people wouldn’t buy a whole horse for a business venture that they were not serious about. “You’d be paid handsomely,” he begins “I own stables in Birmingham so you could bring all of your personal horses to maintain their training while also heading the training of both Saint Clement and Monaghan Boy” You couldn’t hide your surprise at his proposition, you had only met him hours ago and he likely knew nothing of your record other than your horse had beat his. “I don’t race in Birmingham” you stated, which was an honest truth “The races are historically fixed so it’s not well respected within the community. It would reflect poorly on me” You explain tentatively, knowing he was likely involved in the fixing of the races in Birmingham. “That’s no longer the case. Races have not been fixed since I came into management of that issue and also came to the conclusion that the Birmingham races didn’t even begin to tap into the money that there is to be made in this sport. I found that running larger races had a much better payout and those can’t be fixed without losing support of the industry which would cause the profits to plummet” He could see in your face that you didn’t like his reasoning “That being said,” he continued, “I understand that Birmingham now has that reputation so I would support you racing the horses anywhere you think they would be most successful. They would only be trained in Birmingham, and it would be at a private training facility of which you would have influence over management.” “I’d still have to live in Birmingham,” you pointed out “I hope I don’t offend you by saying it’s not exactly a safe of pleasant place to live” “There’s a cottage on the property where you could reside, it has enough room for yourself, your husband and any kids to-” “No husband,” you interrupted quickly, he offered only a raise of the eyebrow “no kid either” you mentally slapped yourself for blurting that out so quickly as it definitely was not the point of the conversation. “Right,” Thomas said slowly “regardless, if you were not a fan of the cottage we could also work out a stipend for renting elsewhere, there are places in the city that are safer and cleaner than others. I could also have security implemented if it was a concern of yours.” You had nearly forgotten who you were talking to. This wasn’t just any wealthy businessman trying to tap into a new market. This was a gangster who controlled organized crime and bribed policemen on the regular. “I’m worried about the reputation of your... business will impact my reputation as a professional who has made it this far in her career by only running clean races” you admitted “I’ve had to fight tooth and nail to be respected in this industry, I’m not prepared to sacrifice that by getting involved in whatever you and your folks are up to in Birmingham” Something that looks like sympathy flashed across his face briefly, you imagined it wasn’t often he dangled a good opportunity in front of someone only to have them hesitate on the principle of honor. “I understand your concern, however I fully intend to only run races cleanly and any involvement in this industry has been a personal venture which is not associated with my family business” you nodded, trying your best to take comfort in his reassurance. Knocking back your old fashioned you stood up from your barstool, “I’ll consider it” you stated, pushing the second old-fashioned towards Thomas. “I thought you said I could kick rocks?” He said with a hint of a smile. “You’re still welcome to do so, but you’re turning out to not be as bad as I thought” you admit with an honest smile before heading in the direction of your lodging. You had much to think about and not much time to do so.

----

taglist: @shelbyteller

[yourtouchismidas]

this thought has plagued me since yesterday (mads knows) but imagine matty helping gigi make a birthday card for rg's birthday (like a milestone birthday or something) and they spend the whole day (day before the birthday) being all secretive in gigi's room and rg is not allowed to enter. and finally at midnight she's presented with 1) the card and 2) 2 babygirls covered in glue and glitter

this is so cute!

you're sitting in the lounge, in the sunlight, warm coffee in your hand and the house is quiet, peaceful. you take a sip, enjoying it, before the slow creep of suspicion infiltrates your mind. your youngest is napping but the other two, the ones who can walk and put their hands in things are up and about and should be with their father. but then again, sometimes being with matty is like having a fourth child. a big overgrown baby girl, just like your three little ones. mischief follows him and now mischief follows your girls too. especially when they are all together.

you take the baby monitor and leave the coffee. your phone starts buzzing where you left it on the table and you see it is your friend's teenage daughter mila, probably calling you to have a melt down at what to wear for your birthday party tomorrow (a meal out and then drinks back at yours, literally nothing to stress about but you know she will). you will call her back later. it's too suspiciously quiet in here. come to think of it. there should be a couple of dogs running around here too. and they're no where to be seen either.

you check the garden. the kitchen. the bathroom. your room. you peak in on baby valentine, who is sound asleep still. gigi and shay have a loft room at the top of the house and so you head up the last flight of stairs.

you can hear taylor swift music, muffled through the door, and little voices, and matty's voice cutting through to tell them to stop arguing. a dog barks inside. ah. here we go.

"erm, hello?" you say outside the door. the voices, which were loud before, stop abruptly. the taylor music carries on. even the dog is quiet.

"what are you guys doing in there?"

nothing.

"i'm coming in," you say.

you hear a little "noo!", not sure which girl it is, and scrambling, and then the door opens, just a crack, and matty's head pops out, the music getting louder.

"we thought you were having a quiet coffee," matty says.

"i was. but then i got... suspicious."

"nothing to be suspicious about!" gigi calls, from inside. matty nods, a floating head in the door way.

"hmmm," you say, "think you guys are hiding something from me."

"nope. no. nothing at all," matty says, "goodbye now."

he tries to close the door on you but you stop him.

"you can't leave me out. that makes me sad!" you say, putting on a sad voice, targeting your middle daughter, which works immediately.

"oh no!" you can hear her gasp behind the door.

"shay," gigi whispers, too loudly, "the surprise!"

matty is shaking his head at you.

"fine. fine. i guess you girls dont want me to play with you."

"that was low," he says. you smirk.

"can i least have the dogs? maybe just one? i'm lonely."

"no, sorry, they're integral to the project," matty says, then quickly, "the project that does not exist. okay then. bye now."

he closes the door. you laugh and head back downstairs where your coffee is still warm. might as well make the most of the peace.

an hour later, just when you're about to go and wake up valley, the five of them (two daughters, two dogs, one matty) come stumbling down the stairs. all five of them are covered in glitter, and paint, and matty has two red smudges of it on each cheek, one a little bigger than the other.

"oh my lord," you say, taking them all in. but your girls look so bright and are grinning and then they present you a big card, a3 size, which is covered in different coloured glitter, shimmering the floor with it as they pass it to you. it says happy birthday mummy, from your loves and on the front is a heart and inside that a four hand prints (three daughters and a matty) and two paw prints.

"we cleaned the dogs, dont worry. and the baby," matty says quickly.

you're crying and you assure them its happy tears and gather up your daughters in your arms.

"hope you have a good birthday mummy," shay says, climbing into your lap.

"i will baby," you say, "if you are all there with me."

"what about valley?" she says.

"valley too of course. i'm just going to go and get her."

you hear her crying.

"then i will come back and look more at your lovely card."

you leave the room, kissing matty's cheek as you go out and whispering that he is a nightmare.

you pick your baby girl out the cot, settling her in your arms and head back down to the rest of your family. on the way, you notice some paint on the side of her tiny wrinkled hand. you will always pretend that you didn't see two daughters, two dogs and a matty, sneaking into your sleeping baby's room and pressing her hand print on the card before wiping the paint off again, through the baby monitor. they will never know. but you will.

[loveharlow]

FOUR - HOT 'N COLD

CHAPTER SYNOPSIS; [5k] A day spent in the springs ends with a fleeting moment in a hot tub between two "best friends" that may be the start of something new or the beginning of the end of their nearly year long situation-ship.

CHAPTER WARNING(S); swearing, mutual pining, mild angst, mentions of food, little bit of pope x kie drama, a couple OC's I randomly added for shits and giggles

A/N; Okayyy so we finally got a little bit of confrontation and I feel like this chapter deserves a moodboard as well (or two...). SORRY FOR ANY GRAMMATICAL ERRORS I DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO PROOFREAD THIS TWICE

PSA; School is starting back up for me so the chapters will be moving a bit slower :/. Not too much, but still.

series masterlist jj masterlist

“IS THIS SPOT OKAY?” SARAH ASKED. She’d stopped in the tall-grass littered area marked “picnics” on the wooden sign we’d passed. I studied the area with a hand over my eyes, shielding them from the harsh sun that was beating down on us since this morning.

I was between the impromptu line we’d been walking in since we’d arrived at the springs, Sarah and Kiara in front of me while John B, Pope and JJ trailed towards the end. 

Kie nodded, her bottom lip sticking out and eyebrows lifted in acceptance. “I think this is fine. Plus, we’re a fair distance from everything else.” She was right. We stood about equal distance from each of the activities, not that it mattered. Canoeing to the right, the waters that were safe to swim in to the left, and some kind of free-play zone in front of us — people playing volleyball, racing and some simply lounging in the area where the grass was sparse and revealed more sand.

Sarah nodded and set down the picnic basket, the rest of us plopping down on the ground in a makeshift circle and unloading the contents of the woven basket. 

“What is all this shit? I thought you brought food. Y’know, mini burgers ‘n shit.” John B criticized as he examined the food we’d pulled out of the basket — chocolate covered strawberries, mini club sandwiches, cans of soda.

“It’s a picnic, you moron. Not a three-course meal.” Kie snapped back, eliciting an eye roll from the brunette boy. 

“Besides, we probably don’t want to eat much right now anyway. We’re going to be swimming and stuff.” I added, cracking open a can of soda — the cold metal can already cooling off my body from the mere touch.

I was sitting next to Kie as she opened up one of the plastic containers holding a sandwich, Pope and John B next to her while JJ and Sarah were sitting to my left. I sipped on the carbonated drink as my eyes scanned the area.

It was pretty and pleasing to the eyes. Tall trees with beautiful hanging leaves — similar to willow trees, tall grass surrounding us, water and sand further out as people canoed, swam, and just had a great time overall. It was the perfect day for something like this — sunny and extremely hot.

We didn’t actually have plans today, for the record. But we decided to find something to do, seeing as it was our, what? Fourth day here? It seemed too early for a lazy day. 

“So, what’s the plan?” Pope piped up, mouth full of grapes. Everyone looked at me, seeing as I had mentioned earlier that I had seen this particular attraction online before and knew a few of the activities we could engage in.

I shrugged nonchalantly, reaching for one of the triangle-cut sandwiches. “I thought we’d go canoeing first. None of us have done it before and it seems to be the leading attraction here.”

“I’m all in. As long as our personal tour guide is recommending it.” JJ joked. It provoked a small smile from me but it didn’t reach my eyes. 

I was still reeling from the events of yesterday. Him wiping the sauce from the corner of my mouth, the eye contact…and the abrupt cut-off. It wouldn’t be such a big deal if I didn’t know what he was doing — JJ was avoiding confrontation, something he did all too well. I’m not an idiot. And neither is he. We were more than friends, that much was clear. And if JJ knew me at all, and he knows me better than almost anyone, he would know that I want answers as to what we are. I need them. 

So, yeah. I was distancing myself from him a bit since the day started. Did he notice? Most likely. But maybe it was about time I started thinking less about why JJ was avoiding me and more about moving on and letting this whole fling-but-not-a-fling thing go. It wasn’t healthy for either of us and I don’t know how he felt but I felt ignored and played with in a sense. I don’t know how much longer I can continue to be friends with him and act like there was nothing there. Because it seemed like he’d keep this game up forever and I didn’t sign up for that.

JJ gave a confused expression at my lack of response but I averted my eyes elsewhere. “Well,” Kie chipped in. “-If we’re going canoeing we might as well hurry. The workers mentioned there’s a limited number of canoes so if we get there too late we’ll have to wait for another party to return.”

Everyone nodded in agreement, finishing off their sodas and snacks and stripping off their shirts and bottoms — revealing our bikinis and swim trunks underneath. The lack of clothing brought a welcomed cool to our slightly sweaty bodies as we folded our clothes and set them on the blanket to head off in the direction of the small boats. 

ARRIVING AT THE EDGE OF THE WATER WHERE THE CANOES WERE, AN EMPLOYEE APPROACHED OUR GROUP WITH A BRIGHT SMILE. She was a beautiful dark-skinned girl with dark brown shoulder length hair that was bouncing with tight curls — a bright smile and wide-brown eyes adorning her round face. She was glowing under the sun as she waltzed over to us in a one-piece sporting the springs logo on the front.

“Hi there.” She stopped in front of us, fiddling with the blue whistle that was attached to a lanyard around her neck. “First time here?”. We all nodded in response. “Okay, great. Awesome. Uh- so unfortunately, we are all out of three-seaters so we only have two-seater canoes but on the bright side-” She surveyed our small group, her eyes lingering on Pope a little longer. “It looks like there’s an even number of you. So if you don’t mind, you can pair up and I can go retrieve the canoes for you.” She suggested.

We told her that was fine and she turned around to start dragging the canoes closer to the edge of the lake. I nudged Pope’s shoulder and he whipped his head around quickly.

“I think a certain cute lifeguard likes you.” The boy scoffed and ran a hand over his head, avoiding eye contact with me.

“No way.” He shook his head, staring at the girl as she struggled to drag the canoes by herself. “She’s like- wayy out of my league. I mean, she’s hot.”

I rolled my eyes and moved to stand behind him as the rest of our friends chatter mindlessly behind us. “First of all, stop selling yourself short.” I reprimanded, pulling his ear. “You’re attractive, Pope. And smart. You’re...a little awkward but we love you all the same,” He rolled his eyes at my teasing. “And plus, that hot girl over there, who by the way could use a helping hand with those canoes, gave you the most obvious heart eyes eyes known to man. So, stop standing here self-deprecating and help that hot employee bring our canoes over.”

“Oh, no. I can’t-” He protested as I pushed him farther towards the struggling girl. “Y/n…”

“Hey!” I called out in the direction of the girl who looked around our age. “My friend, Pope here, can help you out if you need a hand.”

She smiled, a slight blush rushing to her face. “Yeah, yeah. That’d be great. Thank you,” She tucked a strand of her curls behind her ears, sticking a hand out in Pope’s direction — who was, admittedly, standing awkwardly as if he had no clue what to do with his body. “I’m Mallory.”

Pope smiled back and shook her hand. “Pope.” He shut his eyes tightly in mild embarrassment. “But you already knew that…” She giggled and Pope cracked an eye open, surprised she didn’t immediately lose interest at his lack of laid-backness, and smiled at her before helping her move the canoes over to us, me making my way back to the group as they were now staring at me in bewilderment.

"What?"

“Did you just set Pope up?” Kiara asked, arms crossed over her chest — she was trying her best to hide a look of annoyance but it was shining through in the slightest of ways. 

“Uh, yeah? Don’t act like we didn’t see her eye him up and down.” Everyone, except for Kie, nodded in agreement while John B and JJ muttered things like ‘finally’ and ‘that’s my boy’. 

“They got the boats in the water. Might as well head over there.” Kie spoke shortly, walking over and away from us. What’s up with her?

“Wait, what about the pairs-”

“Already got it settled, gorgeous. You’re with me.” JJ winked before walking past me. 

Great. Just great. I should’ve known.

AFTER MALLORY, THE SWEET EMPLOYEE, HAD EXPLAINED EVERYTHING TO US, WE GOT IN THE WATER. She had instructed us not to go past the bright red bowies set out in the water and that the canoe ride was purely for scenic value — no “horseplay”. JJ and I were behind the other two canoes that held the rest of our group — John B and Sarah in the middle, annoying his girlfriend by poking her with the paddle while Pope and Kie led the way, making idle conversation. It sparked a question in my mind.

“Is Kie alright?”

JJ turned to me, continuing to paddle lightly. “What do you mean?”

“She seemed kind of ticked off when I brought up Pope and the girl hitting it off.”

“You didn’t know?”

“Know what?”

JJ shook his head and chuckled lowly, tilting his head back up to flip the hair out of his face. “Kie still has a thing for Pope.” My eyes went wide and my mouth dropped open slightly.

“Wh- she broke things off with him.”

“And now she regrets it.

I sighed and let my shoulders fall. “If I’d known I wouldn’t have pushed him to make a move.”

“Why?”

“Well because, now Kie is probably pissed at me and I feel like a shitty friend.”

JJ shrugged and looked me in the eyes. “So? That’s not on you. We’re adults now. If Kie is pissed it’s no one’s fault but hers. She can’t expect him to wait forever. She has to toughen up or he’s going to move on.”

I laughed at this, a bit bitterly in all honesty, and turned away from him to look at the water as we continued to paddle and take in the scenery. He’s one to talk, I thought. JJ had basically voiced my own troubles, our troubles, vicariously through Pope and Kiara. If he could read them like a book with no problem, why was he struggling to do so with me? I practically had it written in sharpie on my forehead; “I am hopelessly in love with JJ Maybank.” If having your heart on your sleeve was a real, physical thing, mine was stapled to my bare wrist.

I felt a broad hand on my shoulder and returned my gaze to the blonde beside me who now held a look of concern. “Hey, you alright? You went silent on me.”

“I’m fine.” I replied, being short with him. I was being petty, I know. He doesn’t even know that I’m upset and if he does he has no clue why. But I just can’t bring myself to care thinking about all the times JJ has made me feel that exact same feeling — confusion.

“Y/n,”

“I’m fine, JJ.” I snapped at him a bit. Taking a deep breath, I met his eyes. “Sorry, J. I didn’t mean to- I just thought about something. Don’t worry about it.” I sent him a reassuring smile. Nudging my head forward in the direction of our friends who were now more than a few feet ahead of us, I spoke once more, “C’mon. We’re too far behind.”

He nodded but the look in his eyes was hesitant. I felt like everything was coming to the surface and I don’t know how much more time we have to play this game of back and forth before I fly off the handle.

AFTER WE WERE DONE WITH CANOEING, WE HEADED OVER TO THE SWIM AREA. It was a beautiful lake and if you were able to swim back far enough, you could reach the soft, trickling waterfall — that was apparently a popular photo site for visitors Mallory claimed, the girl stuck with us after informing us that her shift was over and Pope invited her to hang out with us before she had to leave. 

It was cooling down but the water still held a nice warmth to it from the sun that was present earlier in the day.

We've been having a great time so far. Everyone seemed to hit it off with Mallory and to top things off, she was attending the same college as me. As the day dwindled and we fooled around in the glistening body of water, the people surrounding us decreased by the minute — soon leaving only us in the water as any remaining guests sat on the grass. 

I noticed Kie had drifted away from the group, brows pinched close together as she was lost in her thoughts when I waded up to her, setting a gentle hand on her shoulder. “You okay?”

She rolled her eyes and looked down at the water. “I’m trying to be.”

I sighed and wound one of my arms around her shoulders. “‘M sorry, Kie. I wish you would’ve told me you still had a thing for him.”

Her head lifted from my shoulder swiftly as her eyes went huge, before squinting at me. “How did you- I am never telling JJ anything ever again.” She grumbled under her breath, head falling to my shoulder once again as we waded slowly.

“He has a point, though. If what he said to you was anything like what he said to me, then he’s right. You shooed him off, Kie. He wanted you, badly. You can’t be mad that he’s moving on or at least trying to.”

She scoffed. “Yeah, well maybe JJ should take a page out of his own book.” I winced at her harsh tone, knowing the jab was directed at me in a sense as well. She sighed and squeezed my hand that was draped over her shoulders. “Sorry. That was rude.”

I shrugged. “It’s fine. You’re right. I mean, it was still kind of rude but I get it.”

“You are too. Right, I mean. I don’t even think I’m in love with him or anything like you are with JJ. But I did genuinely like Pope at some point. I guess it’s hard to see someone make him smile so easily in less than an hour than how I tried to for weeks.”

“At least you’re self-aware.” I joked, both of us giggling. “But I’ll have you know that I think you and Mallory would hit it off really well. She’s part of this beach clean-up program and there’s some open spots.”

I felt the brown-haired girl smile against my shoulder, lifting her head up, my arm slipping from her shoulders. She shook herself off and took a deep breath. “You’re right. I’m Pope’s friend. And I need to act like it. I’m happy for him.” She smiled genuinely, small but genuine.

I held my arm out for her to hook her own through mine, which she did with a bright smile causing one to break out on my own face. We made our way back over to the group where they were all still caught up in a conversation and getting to know Mallory, Kie unraveling her arm from mine and joining in. 

“What’d you say to her?” A gravelly voice spoke from behind me, startling me. I twirled around to find JJ looking down at me — shirtless and hair hanging over his face while his signature shark tooth necklace dangling in front of his toned chest.

“Nothing, really. Basically what you told me. That she has to pretty much let him move on and for her to do the same.” JJ smiled at me admiringly and slung one toned arm over my frame.

“When did you become so wise?” The boy teased as he lightly shook me back and forth in a playful manner.

I forced out a small laugh. “When I started to relate to Kie more than I thought I could.” I mumbled.

His playful smile dropped a bit and his eyebrows pulled themselves together. “What do you mean by that?” Looking up at him, I shook my head and shrugged my shoulders under the weight of his arm.

“Nothing.” He raised a curious brow as if to ask ‘really?’ and I plastered a smile on my cheeks. “I mean it. Honestly.”

“If you say so...” He still looked ambivalent but he let it go. 

“Guys?” Sarah spoke amidst the group of us, standing closer to the shore with a group of 3 girls standing behind her. None of us had even noticed that she’d drifted off. “You up for a game of volleyball before we hit the road? These girls need more people to play with.”

“Count me in.” Kie piped up. “Y/n, you coming? Three-on-three?”

I shrugged and pulled my lips into a thin line. “Why not?” I replied, slipping from under the blonde’s hold and facing him. “Duty calls.” He laughed before jokingly shooing me off. Averting my gaze to Mallory, she was chatting with Pope and I didn't know if I should interrupt but I didn’t want her to feel excluded. “Mallory-” She stopped talking, waiting for me to speak as she made contact with my eyes. “You wanna join? You can be our ref.” I taunted in a friendly manner, wiggling my eyebrows and shaking my shoulders.

She laughed out loud, throwing her head back slightly but shook her head ‘no’. “I think I’m gonna chill here until I have to go. Thanks, though.” I smiled and nodded shortly in her direction before waddling out of the water beside Kie.

We followed Sarah and the other group of girls to the volleyball net that was set in the middle of the sandy plane near the water’s edge, the trio turning to face ours. The girl on the far right broke the silence first — she had bone-straight blonde hair that was pulled back into a low-ponytail and she was significantly shorter than the two girls beside her. 

“I’m Olivia. This-” She pointed to the girl beside her in the middle with similar features to her own — fair skin and blonde hair that was noticeably shorter, enough that it just barely reached her shoulders. “-is Amelia. My older sister. And that-” She craned her neck to look at the girl at the end of the line — jet black hair and olive-toned skin. “-is Mariana. My sister’s best friend and my biggest pain in the ass.”

Mariana rolled her eyes and waved at us. “That is so not true. That little shit is gonna miss me and her sister both when we’re off at college for the next four years.” 

My friends and I smiled at their dynamic. “I’m Y/n.” I voiced, gesturing for the two girls on either side of me. “This Kiara and this is Sarah, my best friends.” We waved in return and got the game going.

They turned out to be really nice girls and Kie and Mariana seemed to be hitting it off and Sarah had even realized she had met Olivia and Amelia before when she went on a business trip with Ward one time. 

The only down-side was that they kicked our asses — Olivia’s one hell of a volleyball player and Amelia’s the one who taught her all she knows. She’s going to college on a sports scholarship. 

The sun had completely set at this point, just now realizing we’d been out practically all day. We were sweaty, damp and smelled like lake water but the day had been a success for the most part.

Sarah and I had bid farewell and separated from the other trio of girls, while Kiara and Mariana were chatting animatedly as Sarah and I stood off to the side and waited for her before a pair of hands came down on my shoulders rather aggressively and a loud “rah!” was heard from behind me.

Whipping around like a kid caught stealing candy, my eyebrows turned downwards and my lips pulled together. “JJ!” I screeched, shoving him back a few inches as he had a grin on his face while John B and Pope stood behind him laughing along, dripping water onto the sand, I assume Mallory had left. “You scared the shit out of me.” I grumbled.

Just then, Kie came bounding back to our group as Mariana returned to her own and bid farewell with a wave. Looking at Kie, I noticed a blush on her cheeks and a small piece of paper she was trying to conceal in her hand, but I’d ask about it later.

“Ready?” Sarah asked, everyone nodding and rushing back over to our spot where all of our belongings remained. We slipped on our shirts and shorts and made our way out of the spring and to the parking lot where the car was. Once inside, Sarah started the car and we were on our way.

WE’D GOTTEN BACK TO THE HOUSE SAFELY AND EVERYONE SPLIT UP TO GO SHOWER AND GO TO SLEEP. We’d tired out from the sun and running around all day.

I was about to head upstairs to hop in the shower and head off to bed. That was, until a hand on my forearm stopped me, craning my neck to find JJ staring up at me from his place at the bottom of the stairs.

“I’m gonna get in the hot tub for a minute. Care to join me?” He suggested. I was contemplating it. It sounded nice, in all honesty. We hadn’t touched the hot tub since we got here and having the powerful jets and hot water hit my body before a real shower and going to bed sounded appealing. 

“Lead the way.”

JJ AND I HAD BEEN SITTING IN THE HOT TUB FOR ABOUT TEN MINUTES. Talking about anything and everything and just reveling in the warmth of the bubbling water. It’d gone silent a couple minutes ago, both of our heads thrown back in ecstasy.

“What’s up with you?”

Lifting my head to look straight ahead at him, I tilted my head to the side in curiosity. “What do you mean?”

“You just...seemed zoned out today. Like in the canoe, I asked if you were alright like twice and you said it was nothing but I don’t buy it.” He reminded. “Talk to me.” The boy urged.

Oh. That’s what he meant.

“It really is nothing, JJ.”

“I call bull. Why won’t you tell me what’s wrong?” Would he please just drop this? I’ve been holding it together for the most part all day.

“Because nothing is wrong. Why are you so adamant that there is?”

“Because I know you. There’s clearly something going on-” Just fucking drop it-

“Why do you care so much?” I snapped. JJ’s neck reeled back at my harsh tone, a deep look of concern etched on his features as he moved from his place against the side of the hot tub to stand right in front of me, his tall and hot frame towering over mine.

“I’m sorry.” He spoke softly, his hand trailing over my waist under the water, making his touch one-thousand times hotter. “I didn’t mean to push you. I’ve just been worried ‘s all.”

I sighed. “And I appreciate, JJ, I really do. But I really don’t want to talk. Not now, anyway.” I replied gently, too focused on his presence and how the distance between us, or lack of, was making my heart beat out of my chest.

He wants to know what’s wrong? This. This is what’s wrong. How he makes me feel, how he knows he makes me feel.

Silence fell over us as his hand caressed the curve of my hip and the other came to cradle the other side, pulling me up to stand in the small pool of water as well. We stood chest to chest, his eyes glued to mine as everything else faded from my peripheral and I could only see him.

My own hands came up to rest on his chest. Pull away, I thought to myself. But it was too late. It was over for me the second he licked his lips and leant down to crash his own against mine.

And I was making the same mistake I made almost a year ago. The same mistake I made every time this happened. I was kissing my best friend without a care in the world for who saw or what it meant but I knew the second we pulled away that this feeling — the euphoria in my heart and the butterflies in my stomach — it would all fade away. It would all vanish and so would he.

So, I savored this moment because I knew, somewhere deep down I knew, that this, wouldn’t be happening for a while. And it would be because of me. Because even as I stood here — JJ’s tongue down my throat, my hands forming tight fists in his hair and his grip on my waist tightening by the second, I could hear the snapping of my heart strings in my ears and my brain yelling at me to stop whatever this was. To stop hurting myself by letting him hurt me time and time again.

I was the first to pull away, out of breath and head dipping down to stare at the small waves of water between us. I knew it was coming when his hands fell from my waist and he was stepping back. I didn’t even look up as I heard the water splashing, signaling he had exited the tub.

I just stood there — in the middle of the hot tub with swollen lips, the muscle memory of his touch on my hips, and hot tears brimming in my eyes at the realization that he was going to pretend like this never happened…again.

“I’m, uh- I’m getting kind of tired. Think I’m gonna head inside.” 

“JJ…” I spoke, voice shaking slightly as I still made no move to look at him. Hearing his feet pat against the concrete as he walked towards the sliding door.

“I’ll meet you inside-”

“When will you just admit it?” I snarled with a humorless laugh as I felt the first tear escape, trailing down my cheek. That was when I heard him stop in tracks, the atmosphere so silent that I could hear the drops of water that were falling from his body hit the ground.

So silent, I could hear the nervous gulp he took before speaking. “Admit what?”

That was when I found the courage to look up at him, my eyes red and one lone tear streak on my face. He was staring at me but his gaze didn’t reach my eyes and he was clutching his towel in his hand for dear life. “Don’t act like you don’t know. This whole cat-and-mouse game is getting really old, JJ, and it’s no fun when you don’t even know which role you’re playing.” I voiced my thoughts harshly and I stepped out of the hot tub, snatching my towel from the deck chair and moving past him to pull the sliding door open myself.

I didn’t look back as I made my way up the stairs, hearing him swear under his breath, to our shared room and into the bathroom to shower. By the time I got out, he was already in bed facing away from me. He probably showered elsewhere just to avoid brushing past me. I threw my clothes into the hamper and climbed in, facing away from him and letting my thoughts wander. Wander to how we got here in the first place…

“Heyy, gorgeous.” JJ slurred, beer in hand as he stumbled toward me. When his frame collided with mine, I could barely support him considering I was intoxicated myself. So I shimmied my shoulders to get him off of me.

We were standing by a tree, away from the core of the party, thrown by us at The Chateau, to celebrate our senior year. JJ and I leaned against the thick bark, both drunk and giggly.

“Why are you over here?”

“What do you mean?”

“Shouldn’t you be-” I took another sip from my red solo cup. “-with a touron or something.” I saw him shrug out of the corner of my eye, I think. 

“I’d rather be over here with you.” He spoke dazingly, turning to view me from the side before I turned to look at him as well. “Y’know you look, like, really pretty tonight. ‘M not sure if that’s a weird thing to say.” 

I blushed and tried to nudge him, missing by a few inches and merely brushing his elbow. “Shut up.” I muttered.

“No. ‘M being so serious.” He chuckled. “I always think you look pretty.” He was staring at me like he’d never seen me before, this starry look in his eyes before he was leaning forward and smushing his lips against mine — the taste of alcohol and fruit lingering around in the kiss.

I don’t remember everything from that night, but I remember the kiss. And the next morning, when we all woke up scattered around the Chateau, JJ and I had agreed that it was a drunken kiss, a one-time thing.

And that would’ve been fine had it been true. But it wasn’t. It happened again. And again when we were sober. And again. And again. And somewhere down the line I had ended up falling in love with my best friend. And when I went to talk about it, he’d find any and every way to avoid it.

We’d run out of excuses. And I was ready to face that fact — the fact that we weren’t just friends.

But he wasn’t.

He still isn’t. And I don’t know if he ever will be.

A/N: Not gonna lie, this chapter overall was not my fav so far but the ending does something to me and I'm the one who wrote it😭

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©loveharlow

[convenientalias]

Why You Should Watch White Christmas (the 2011 Kdrama): A Manifesto

Yesterday I was watching White Christmas (specifically episodes 4 and 5) for the fourth time. I watched it for the first time like five years ago and all my feelings are still there and still potent so today I am here to tell you that you should watch it too.

THE BASICS:

Seven kids at an elite private high school over winter break. They stayed there because they all received mysterious black letters, accusing them of vague, nonspecific crimes and claiming that on New Year's Day someone will die. When they find out that ALL of them received this letter, they decide one of them must have been the one to send it--and they set out to discover who it was. In the meantime, a giant blizzard shuts down all the roads, and telephone and internet connections go down as well, leaving the school isolated and all on campus trapped there together.

things develop from there.

THE CHARACTERS:

Park Moo-yul: A Good Boy. His grades are constantly second highest in the school; he's obsessed with studying and wants to someday come in first. Sort of a leader type, he tries to organize the investigative efforts (and later, keep things from falling apart--except, much as he'd like to believe it, he's not immune to the Lord of the Flies effect lols). For the first couple episodes, he's sort of the main/POV character, but by the end it's more of an ensemble cast show. In the episodes I just watched, there are multiple scenes with him staring down a gun and waiting to get shot. Some ppl think he's boring but I love a guy with a hero complex.

Choi Chi-hoon: The Genius. The first place to Park Moo-yul's second. People call him unemotional and heartless; it turns out later he does have difficulty feeling emotions due to a neurological issue. Loves science, interested in the black letters as a puzzle but for a while pretends not to be. The least likely to go Lord of the Flies but his Very Logical plans are often actually very risky.

Yoon Eun-sung: The Only Girl. (except for that one other woman who shows up later but she's not one of the seven so we're not counting her.) Used to be the most popular girl in school and also Park Moo-yul's girlfriend but then she Changed (aka she developed depression). Sarcastic and possibly suicidal. Everyone is OBSESSED with her (well, four, arguably five characters are obsessed with her, but this show only has a total of 11 characters so that's really too many).

Also, she's played by Esom, so if you like Esom, you should watch White Christmas.

Lee Jae-kyu: Why are you here???? For the first few episodes, that's a genuine question; he doesn't have an apparent connection to the others in the group, and it's a mystery why the black letter sender would have any grudges against him. It turns out later he has some secret issues. He's a bit of a snake in the grass. I won't go into it.

Yang Kang-mo: He wants to be a reporter someday! His nickname is Cameraman Yang, and he's always carrying a camera around. He's deaf, and partly as a result, gets bullied a lot. He is the favorite character of the friend I was watching this show with yesterday. Also there's a whole episode of him getting chased around with baseball bats, look forward to it.

Jo Young-jae: A bully, a coward and a messed up kid. A line he says in the show is, "Yes, I'm used to people hating me. To the extent that I'm scared when people don't hate me. But you made me hate myself!" A line someone else says to him is, "You're not a bad person. You're weak. If everyone knew how weak you were, they wouldn't hate you." To watch Jo Young-jae have multiple mental breakdowns, watch White Christmas, I promise it is very fun.

Also, he's played by Kim Young-kwang, so if you like Kim Young-kwang, you should watch White Christmas.

Yoon Su: His nickname is Angel. In general, it requires incredible academic acumen to go to Susin High; Yoon Su got in bc his parents donated money to the school. He's a loner and does not want to be here; his ambition in life is to be a musician, and he loves playing the guitar. He has some mental health issues and takes (unspecified) recreational drugs. He also has a giant grudge. Against who? Stay tuned to find out.

Also he's played by Lee Soo-hyuk, so if you like Lee Soo-hyuk, you should watch White Christmas.

Kang Mi-reu: THIS BOY IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE. Remember how I said seven kids got letters, seven kids stayed at the school? Meet kid number eight. Kang Mi-reu didn't get a letter and he didn't get permission to stay on campus either; technically he's on probation and on his way to being expelled. He sneakily stayed on campus to investigate who framed him for exploding a statue, the reason for his expulsion. He can go through air vents and has a great theme song. He wants to solve his problems with violence. Actually he once beat Choi Chi-hoon at academics but got pissed off at always losing to him and gave up on being a perfect student. We all love Kang Mi-reu.

Also he's played by Kim Woo-bin so if you like Kim Woo-bin, you should watch White Christmas.

Yoon Jong-il: The teacher who stayed on campus to supervise. Wow, I'm sure with a responsible adult around, there will be no chaos or violence breaking out on campus.

Kim Yo-han: He's not even affiliated with the school. He got in a car accident near it and then got stuck here due to the storm. He keeps getting concussions/broken bones/deadly fevers. Also, he's a psychiatrist, and finds all the weird shit going on at the school rather intriguing.

IS IT SHIPPY?

I mean, is there any actual romance? No.

Do we see slow burn friendships develop from suspicion to deep trust and affection over the course of the show? Also no.

Do I think some of these people should make out? Yeah.

A few ships I have specifically:

-Choi Chi-hoon/Park Moo-yul: Obvious rival ship, overemotional dude/kind of cold dude, leader type/genius type. There is also some hurt/comfort towards the end that I really can't describe without spoilers but the mix of resentment and trust is immense.

-Kang Mi-reu/Park Moo-yul: This is my just for fun ship. Good boy/bad boy vibes. Also Kang Mi-reu seems to actually listen to Park Moo-yul when for the most part he won't listen to anyone. Also he snuck into Park Moo-yul's bedroom once while he was sleeping and teased him about the fact that he and all the others got black letters and won't the sender be so offended he dares to sleep instead of sitting up paranoid all night. I just think they're cute.

-Yang Kang-mo/Jo Young-jae: Yes this is a bully/victim ship which is not usually my thing, but I love both of them and also Young-jae is so pathetic and Kang-mo honestly scares him at multiple points. Meanwhile Kang-mo is kind of tired and fed up with him but at this point has sort of a weird connection with him regardless. They know each other.

-Yoon Eun-sung/Jo Young-jae: Young-jae is my favorite of the dudes who's obsessed with Eun-sung, and the most toxic of them as well. She used to be perfect and he had a resentful crush on her for that; now she's kind of messed up but still aloof and superior, and he still wants and hates her at the same time. And she knows, and teases him about it, and he acts nonchalant but you can tell it grinds at him. The best m/f dynamic of the show.

I have a bunch of other ships.... explaining them involves spoilers so I'll just list a few: Kang Mi-reu/Yoon Su, Yang Kang-mo/Yoon Eun-sung/Park Moo-yul, Lee Jae-kyu/Choi Chi-hoon, Lee Jae-kyu/Jo Young-jae.

BUT, PERHAPS MOST IMPORTANTLY... THE VIBES!!!

I love the characters of White Christmas but I mostly rewatch it so much bc 1) the pacing is on point and 2) it's so cinematically satisfying.

In terms of plot and pacing--Everything moves fast. Each episode is very distinct from the others, the plot consistently moving forward at a breakneck pace. Each episode I would say gets a little faster and wilder (with the exception of episode 3, perhaps, which moves a little slow--but then episode 4 goes completely unhinged, so it's a fair exchange). There is shit going on and they are going to cram a whole show's worth of content into 8 episodes and you are going to eat it.

In terms of production: Visually stark. Lots of glass and snow and shadows everywhere. Fun shots. A great soundtrack. For one thing, Wake Up by Arcade Fire recurs a lot and the vibes are immense and very teenage angst and "what the fuck am I supposed to do".

Anyways here's some shots I think convey the vibe:

ANYWAY.

Watch White Christmas! And if you do, or if you've already watched it, please talk to me about it! I am currently in the White Christmas feelings, as I often am this time of year.

[overlydramaticinephile]

Number four.

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Fem! Reader (no physical descriptions) 

Summary: Steve and Y/N worry about their future together after high school. (Hope that's a good enough summary...)

Word count: 2,9k

Warnings: Based in season 2 Steve, Nancy and Steve never dated, underage drinking, drunk reader, Steve being kind of a douche, little angst?? Mostly fluff though. Also, like one curse word. (English is NOT my first language)

A/N: Hi! So, this is my first fic…I´m very excited but also super nervous. I wanted to write this because Steve reminds me a lot of Pacey Witter, one of my favorite characters ever so I thought I would do a Dawson´s Creek episode homage to a scene I love so, yeah, anyway…hope you guys enjoy! <3

Steve Harrington or King Steve as many in Hawkins High are used to calling him, he's the kind of guy to make someone nervous just by his mere presence, and don't even think about him talking to you because you will probably be left frozen to even respond. He's got the looks too, a high school version of Tom Cruise if you will, with that award-winning smile and hair that could possibly get its own talk show, Steve Harrington was the envy of many boys and girls in Hawkins.

However, Steve here was good at keeping secrets. Like the fact that he didn't like his friends and it was all a big status charade, that he and his parents never had a good relationship which made him feel lonely every time he was at his house, and that he might be the most popular guy in high school but that didn't mean it would get him out of it, high school I mean, because that's right, he keeps his below-average grades a secret from everyone. Well, maybe not everyone. There is, of course, Y/N L/N. Steve Harrington's girlfriend. When people talk about opposites attract, they might as well be talking about Steve and Y/N and their relationship. Y/N has always been a straight-A student and even if she won't admit it, she is pretty much a goody two shoes. You will never see her skipping class, except for that one time when it was Steve's birthday and she wanted to do something special and even then, she took her time to justify herself, it was his 18th birthday after all. Totally worth it, because believe it or not, Steve and Y/N are in for the long haul. They are pretty much attached to the hip at this point, and everyone knows they are Hawkins High class of '84 couple.  

 That brings us to the present. March 18th, 1984.

Y/N was sitting in her favorite coffee shop with her best friend, Nancy Wheeler. They were both drinking their not too hot, not too cold coffees. Nancy could see that Y/N was not fully present, she was most likely overthinking, she's aware that school for a senior can be hard in these couple of months; so close to graduating and not being able to get enough sleep for it.

“You shouldn't stay up all night stressing about college, you'll get in some place great. They'll give you tons of financial aid, and everything will be perfect” said Nancy trying to ease her friend's nerves that could be easily pointed out by how she was furrowing her eyebrows this whole time.

Y/N sighs looking down at her now empty coffee cup. “Yeah that's what I thought too…until yesterday.” you could tell something was really eating her up inside.

“What happened yesterday?”

“I had a meeting with the new college advisor.”

Y/N started doing that face she does when she's a little embarrassed, you know, the one where she gets her lips turning slightly up making her cheeks look even fuller. It was adorable really, not that she would ever think that though.

“So?” Nancy was waiting for Y/N to drop the bomb on her already.

While Y/N was having trouble addressing the issue until she finally said it. “I'm fourth.”

Now Nancy was trying to figure out what she meant by that. “Fourth? Four- Fourth in your class?” Nancy gasped with so much excitement that some heads turned to their table with confusion. “Y/N! That´s amazing!”

“Yeah…it's amazing…but Nancy, all the places that I thought I wanted to apply to, they're looking for people who are number four, and they're you know, concert violinists or they won the Westinghouse science prize, or they're legacies like Heather. I mean…maybe I shouldn't even bother, I--I'd probably just be wasting the application fees.”

“Come on, Y/N/N, your defeatist attitude has to go.” Nancy hated seeing her friend doubt herself like this. “What does Steve say?” she added.

Y/N furrowed her eyebrows even more, if that's even possible. “Steve is barely going to graduate, I can't exactly cry on his shoulder about my tragic lack of extracurricular activities. If I tell Steve how stressed I am, he's just going to think that I'm this pathetic, whiny crybaby, you know?”

To be clear, Y/N wasn't a snitch but Nancy happened to be one of the best math tutors around in school and she always found out what students needed help, that's when she saw Steve's name, and…well she pretty much got in on the secret.

Later that week

“Look, going to one of these schools could open opportunities you've always dreamed about, right?

“Yes.” said Y/N with no hesitation in her voice.

“So, your dreams are your dreams, Y/N. You can't apologize for them. Just talk to him. You'll probably find out they're his dreams, too.”

Steve and Y/N were studying at Steve's place. Y/N wanted to help her boyfriend with his schoolwork and be ready for anything in the process. Steve, on the other hand, was just happy he got to spend some extra time with his girl.

They have been studying for a little bit over an hour now, it's around 6 in the afternoon and Steve couldn't ditch the feeling that something was bothering her. He thought that in a couple of minutes she would be talking all about it but when she kept re-reading the same page of her English book report he realized she probably wasn't. Therefor, Steve knew he needed to know what was wrong and if he could possibly help. He always felt like he owed Y/N a lot, him always thinking that she deserves better or that she's too good for him happen to be one of his deepest concerns. Of course, she doesn't feel that way in the slightest but what can I say, they are both very stubborn people. While Steve was thinking about all of this for the third time this day, he didn't realize he was staring, which of course she noticed, that's when she finally had enough.

Y/N sighs. “I found out yesterday that I'm fourth. My class rank. I'm fourth.”

“If I tell you what's bothering me, will you promise not to laugh at me, or tell me I'm insane or insist that I should just get over myself?”

As Steve got out of his thoughts, he couldn't help but smile at her nervous tone. “I think I can probably do that, yeah,” he said with a warm and inviting voice.

Steve without a second thought to his previous promise, chuckles “That's your problem? That's not a problem. If anything, that's a reason to quit studying.”

“I don't even know why I bother. I knew you wouldn't understand,” said Y/N.

Steve caught the look of sadness in her eyes and said “Ok, I'm sorry. That was bad. Can we try that again? Yeah? But this time, you've got to cut out all that stuff about being number four, 'cause I know that can't possibly be the reason you're so bothered.”

Y/N rolls her eyes and sighs, now sitting next to Steve in his bed. “Well, no, It's…it's just that I always thought that if I did well in school, that these doors would open for me, you know, and--and maybe I was just being naive. Maybe I've just set these goals that are unrealistic, and you know, certain people get into certain places because of who their parents are, how--you're not even listening.”

“Uh, no, I was listening. Look, we should just all have your problems you know? You're sitting here as a girl with one of the brightest futures on the face of the planet talking to a guy who's not going to get into any school where they don't give him his own tools.”

Y/N looks confused and sighs. “Put your shoes on. Let's go out.”

Now it was Steve's turn to look confused. “Out? We can't go out.”

Y/N stands up looking for that baby blue top that she loves and always leaves at Steve's. “Yeah, we can.”  

“You know, just when this conversation starts to get emotionally complicated you want to bail. Who’s the guy in this relationship?”

Y/N turns to him and with an unbothered look says “You are, and like the guy, you have a choice. You can either stay here and prove how insensitive you are, or we can go to Amy's un-birthday party.”

“Right…I'll get my shoes.” with that, Steve knew in his gut he was in for a long night.

---------------------------

Arriving at the party you could tell everyone was already pretty wasted. It was the first big party of the year after all.

Steve and Y/N enter the house and instantly guys start to greet Steve while the girls were whispering behind Y/N's back. That was something she will never get used to.

 “We came for your immortal soul. That is if you got one.” Y/N mimicked his smile from earlier earning a very dramatic eye roll from Tommy.

Going to the kitchen the couple met with the voice of Tommy H, a grade-A asshole in Hawkins High and of course one of Steve's friends.

“Harrington. I knew you couldn't resist a party.” He says with that smug smile that you just want to wipe off his face. He then turns his head slightly to see Y/N, and let’s just say they don't get along. “I see you've brought the prim reaper.” He said with an annoyed look, they have hated each other since they can remember, and dating Steve definitely didn't change that.

Finally, Steve decided to cut in, “Actually I just want a drink.” he said with no emotion in his voice whatsoever.

Steve takes the cup away from her as fast as he can. “Oh, no, no, no. I don't think so. It is a proven fact, that you, madam, cannot hold your alcohol.”

“Mm-hmm. Here's one for you and for you.” Tommy directs the second drink at Y/N.

“Thanks.”

Y/N scoffs. “So let me get this straight, you can drink at parties, and I can't?” Oh oh, rocky territory.

“Yes, because as you so rightly pointed out, I am a guy, and if I'm going to get in trouble for being a guy, I think I should at least get to act like one every once in a while.”

At this point, Y/N looks at him with this fake agreement look which makes Steve self-conscious, that couldn't be a good sign. “You know, with your advance permission and approval. Of course, I wouldn't, you know, do it without asking first.”

 Later that night…

“That's fine.”

“That's fine?” Steve was waiting for the shoe to drop.

Y/N's face changes to a look of calmness and unbotherness. “Yeah. We'll both be guys tonight. Cheers.” And there it was. The shoe dropped.

As expected, Y/N didn't feel like being babysitted by Steve, wouldn't that be ironic? So, tonight she lost him while spreading in the crowd of people to find one of her friends. Leaving Steve to do some finding of his own.

Tommy H. was having fun that much they knew. “Excellent. I love this girl. It's like she's trying to lose.”

Y/N was pacing around trying to find Steve and give him a piece of her mind. Her drunk mind that is. Until of course her eyes went wide in surprise.

“Strip poker. I leave you alone for 2 seconds, and you end up playing strip poker?”

Shit. Steve thought. “Originally this was just poker-poker until I started kicking his ass. Then Tommy decided to change the stakes on me, but I'm finished, now, and, uh, we can just leave.”

Oh, this was too good for Y/N to leave behind. Mocking surprise, she says “Why leave? There's a half-naked chick in the room.”

Steve knew where this was going and he wasn't really looking forward to that. “It's just a game. Up until now, nobody's taken off anything other than socks.”

“So, it's all just good, old, clean fun?”

“Yeah, exactly. Just good, clean, American guy fun.” said Steve with a smile that thought would make Y/N leave the issue alone.

“You heard me, now, what does a girl have to take off in order to play this game?” Y/N took a chair and sat down while drinking her punch.

“Mm. Deal me in.”

“Excuse me?” by now everyone was just looking at the couple and their little moment. Hawkins High most popular couple having an argument at a party? Scandalous.

“Ok, that's enough”, Steve says with an unexpected clap to make clear he was being serious. “It's time for us to leave now 'cause you see, you're drunk, you're bordering on disorderly and you are definitely insane. So, get up. Let's go. Shall we? Finished? Stand up. Let's go.” he said in a sing like voice, hoping Y/N wouldn't cause more of a scene.

“And why would I do that?” said Y/N smirking at her losing patience boyfriend.

“You want me to stand up?” Oh, Y/N was enjoying this, he thought.

“Yes, I'd like for you to stand up now.” he said faking a smile.

“Because you are forcing me to make the ultimate guy maneuver.” And before she could give him a response to what he means by that, Steve carried her on his shoulder and starting walking to exit the party.

“Steve, uh, you can put me down now, Steve. I'm fine.”

----------------------

After a quiet ride full of inside thoughts from both of them, they finally arrived at Y/N's house. Steve got out of the car and went to the other door to help her very drunk girlfriend.  

“All right, you.” said Steve waiting for Y/N to get out of the car while he opens the door for her.  

“I can't walk, Steve.” said Y/N in almost a whisper like voice.  

“Before, I had to drag you kicking and screaming, but now you want to be carried? no.”

“It's a woman's right to change her mind.” says Y/N with her head out of the car.

“Ah, but tonight you're one of the guys, remember? and guys walk. So come on, number four. Out you get, watch your head.”

That's when the Y/H/C girl tried to get out of the car with her boyfriend's help. “Uh...I don't really feel so good.”

Steve scoffed. “Well, guess what? you're going to feel even worse tomorrow morning. And you still won't be any closer to getting into the ivy-covered institution of your choice.” he said with a mocking smile that didn't actually mean any harm.

“Steve. I've been doing some thinking.” Yup. this was really happening.

“Yeah. Drunk thinking…”  that made Steve nervous to say the least.

“Maybe… maybe that's not what I really want. Maybe I just want to stay here. You know, I mean--I mean, look, it's--it´s really beautiful here and...and I could just--”

“Just what? Stay here and work as a waitress all your life? Come on. Forgive me if you're losing me here, Y/N/N, but to be perfectly honest, you haven't made the slightest bit of sense all night, even before you were drunk--”

“I wanna be with you, Steve. I wanna stay and be with you.” she said with a tone of sadness in her eyes. Sure, she wanted to leave Hawkins behind for good but the idea of losing Steve because of it scared the crap out of her.

Steve sighed. “Baby, if you wanna be with me, then staying here would be a really stupid idea, considering I don't plan to be here, I plan to be wherever you are.”

Y/N's sad frown turned into a very happy drunk smile. “Really?”

Steve couldn't help but smile himself. “Yes. Really. Not that you deserve to hear such things right now.”

Y/N sighed while they finally stopped leaning on Steve's car and started walking to her house. “I know, I know. It was a very stupid thing to get drunk.”

“Yes, it was. I mean let's face it here, Y/N/N. You are destined for academic glory, and your boyfriend is circling the drain, which is a problem. In fact, that is a very big problem, but you couldn't possibly have thought that you could solve all your problems in one night, with alcohol of all things.”

“No…” said Y/N with a shy voice.

Steve decided to keep going with his thoughts. “No. Because alcohol, you know, it has that effect on problems. It just never solved them, ever. And I would hate to think that I fell in love with a moron.”

Oh, that definitely caught Y/N's attention making her turn to face her boyfriend with that drunk happy smile that she gave him earlier.

“So, you're in love with me, huh?”

“Well, not currently, no. Right now, you're just some crazy drunk girl I got to get in that door without waking up her parents, but generally speaking…yes.”

Y/N laughed. “May I kiss you right now?”

“Yes, please.” said Steve with a wide smile.

“Mm-mmm-mmm! But I'm still not carrying you.” Steve murmured between kisses.

Y/N pulled back and whispered in his ear. “Please.” with the most adorable pouty face Steve had ever seen.  

Y/N started giving him puppy eyes hoping that would convince him.  

“You can give me the eyes, it's just not gonna work.”

“Nope.” Steve laughed.

He pulled away from the kiss. “Halfway, that's it, I swear. I'm not kidding. My back's killing me here.” That made Y/N grin uncontrollably.

She started kissing him again.

“Oh, come on, honestly, you don't-- Y/N, do you think I'm gonna fall for this? Y/N/N…”

“Well, I guess since we're up here...”

Steve ended up carrying Y/N all the way to her room after he found the spare key of course. Even though he tried to act tough, there's nothing he wouldn't do for that girl.

FEEDBACK IS GREATLY APPRECIATED ❤️

[mozart-the-meerkitten]

Kitten update!

So Maraly's kittens are now four weeks (1 month) old and Leeli's are now 3 weeks old! And you know what that means...

NAMES! :D

I know some of you wanted me to give them Wingfeather names to go with the mamas, but the problem with that is... we can't keep 11 kittens. Even I, who am the epitome of a crazy cat lady with the softest heart for kittens ever, know that this is not feasible. We already had four cats before this, and we're keeping the three original rescues. We can't have 18 cats again, especially if 16 are inside our house! And it's going to be very hard for me to give the babies up as it is and giving them names of characters (or other cats I've had) I love will just make this harder. Also, my mom came home one day like, "so I think we should name the kittens after Inkheart characters" and who am I to disagree I love the Inkheart series. That being said there is one special baby kitten with a Wingfeather name but I'll get to her later.

Maraly's babies names!

So this is Elinor (Ellie), formerly known as Gray! She is the eldest kitten, Maraly's firstborn, and she acts like it! She is the biggest and most advanced in skills. My mom said the other day (and I agree) that she acts more like a 6 week old than a 4 week old (and she weighs 1.2 pounds! That's about a FOURTH of Maraly's body weight!). She leads the charge in most accomplishments (except eating, interestingly enough, she was the third to start eating wet food) being able to run, hop, climb, play with balls, use the litterbox and attempt to escape their playpen before all the rest of her siblings! And she is the SWEETEST little darling- loves to cuddle and looks at you with the most adoring eyes. We don't know who she's meant to help, but she is an awfully special kitten and God definitely has a plan for her.

This is Roxanne (Roxie), formerly known as Four as she was the fourth of Maraly's kittens born. She is right behind her sister Ellie in all physical accomplishments, though she was the last kitten to start eating wet food (I JUST got her to start YESTERDAY!). She is a BUSY little thing, always running and adventuring somewhere! She wants to go everywhere and see everything. She's also very sweet, though less cuddly and she likes to try and climb my legs. xD

Maraly's three black babies are nigh impossible to distinguish in pictures so here's just some cute pictures of the three of them.

The biggest black kitten's name is Inkheart, as she is black and easiest to see markings on in the right light (since Inkheart is the name of a book markings=words, I thought it was fun and my mom insisted we name a kitten Inkheart so xD). She was the first to start eating solid food (wet AND dry food!). She screamed a LOT at me when she was younger but now she likes to climb on my lap and cuddle (or bite me, y'know, depends on the mood xD).

The second biggest kitten is named Sabine, formerly known as white spot. My dad named this one after a character in the Star Wars show Rebels since we've been watching it and we all think she's cool. She was the second kitten to start eating wet food and she ALSO likes to climb on my lap and attack and/or cuddle with me. xD

The littlest black kitten is Maraly's one and only boy, named The Black Prince (Prince) and formerly known as white tip, since he has a few white hairs on the very tip of his tail and it's how I've been distinguishing him since he was a newborn. xD He's an awfully cute little bugger, and fiesty, very playful.

All three of Maraly's black babies frequently play together and get up to trouble together. For instance, today they were trying to climb on top of their play tent WHILE their baby cousins were sleeping in it! They also often gang up on Maraly to nurse from her. xD Two of them (Prince and Sabine, I think) have been claimed by a girl who works at a local bakery my mom often stops at, so they will be able to continue to cause trouble together even after they leave us!

Since tumblr only lets me put ten pictures in a post and this is already quite long I'm going to put the names of Leeli's babies in another post (hopefully soon). In the meantime, here's a few more pictures:

*I'll make a man out of you playing in the background*

Meeting uncle Kalmar! (he was so sweet and nice to her! didn't hiss or growl and I think he gave her a kiss here <3)

This kitten is illegally cute *flips table*

[twistedtummies2]

Glamour - Chapter 2 (Trade)

This is the second part of a four-part trade story with @hooter-n-company (a.k.a. Rchlis). She is making some very special art for me, and in return, she asked me to write a story to introduce a Twisted Wonderland OC she's sort of had stewing in the background for a while: his name is Taoka Latronis, and he is based on Tamatoa from "Moana."

I absolutely LOVE Tamatoa. He's a fun villain, and a surprising crush (albeit a somewhat mild one, for me, personally). Rchlis wanted to create a character for the TW universe based on the big glam crab, and I certainly wasn't going to say no. The advantage of this being a trade, instead of a commission, was I could go and make a much longer and more detailed story, in return for much more detailed and elaborate artwork, without either of us having to pay exorbitant amounts that frankly neither of us could afford. Win-win. XD This was a LOT of fun to make, and Taoka is one of my favorite OCs I've gotten to write for that I DIDN'T create myself, if not my favorite (at least as far as TW goes, I should clarify). Hopefully a lot of you like him, too. ;)

Like with other stories of this nature, the other parts will be uploaded one a day over the coming few days. So be on the lookout! Part one went up yesterday.

WARNING: THIS PARTICULAR SECTION DOES NOT INCLUDE ANY KINKS DIRECTLY. HOWEVER, THERE ARE IMPLICATIONS OF VORE AND OTHER KINKS SPRINKLED THROUGHOUT THE FIRST THREE PARTS. (I actually think this part might be the only chapter that DOESN'T feature kinks at all, possibly.) DON'T LIKE? TOO YOUNG? DON'T READ.

NOTE/DISCLAIMER: The lyrics to the songs used in this chapter are not mine. One is a song you should all know from a Disney movie that you should all also know. I used a cover by Jonathan Young as my guide. The other is a song from "Labyrinth," composed and performed by David Bowie - it seemed appropriate. All rights to the original tunes go to their owners.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

“AND NOW, AUDIENCE MEMBERS OF TRIPLE-S! IT’S TIME TO MEET YOUR JUDGES!” The announcer’s declaration was followed by much clapping. From your place just slightly offstage, you watched the opening ceremony get underway. One by one, the announcer presented the judges for the Sage’s Solo Showdown. The two student judges - Vil and Neige - were the first to step up. Given their celebrity statuses, each was greeted with screams and squeals, as well as great applause. Neige all but pranced up to his seat on the judge’s booth, waving excitedly to the audience. He flashed a peace sign and winked at someone in the crowd, before sitting down. Vil followed him. He strutted to his place and bowed regally, smiling a sort of indulgent, almost sultry smile at the crowd. You couldn’t help but chuckle as Vil sat down: when Neige had appeared, you’d seen fangirls bouncing with giddy excitement. When Vil appeared, however, you saw them swoon and faint dead away. That said everything about each of them, you felt, in a nutshell. Divus Crewel stepped up next, as the “teaching judges” now came into play. You were surprised by how much applause he got. He was no celebrity superstar in the way Vil and Neige LeBlanche were, you supposed his recognition as a professor at NRC, along with any clout his “extracurricular activities” had gotten him, would have still garnered him a decent fanbase. “I wonder who the fourth judge is,” you murmured. “Nya! We haven’t seen any of the teachers at Royal Sword,” whispered Grim with a nod. “I’m curious, too!” The pair of you would soon get your answer. “And now, ladies and gentlemen!” the announcer’s voice boomed. “Our final judge for this year’s competition, and our chief master of ceremonies! I’m sure a lot of you know him: one of the hottest musicians in Twisted Wonderland, a native of this very island, who’s just started a new career of teaching at Royal Sword Academy! Please put your hands together for the mighty…the magnificent…MAVERICK MOKULAU!” The crowd went just as wild as they had for Vil and Neige, if not wilder. From your vantage point, you could see the latter of the young superstars bounce happily as he applauded from his seat, a look of idolizing wonder in his eyes. (Vil and Crewel, for their part, clapped politely; the latter even somehow managed to falsify a smile.) Soon, you could see the mysterious Mr. Mokulau: your first immediate thought was that he looked like some sort of rock star. he was a very large man, similar in height and build to Coach Vargas, but with darker skin and long, curly, yet well-groomed hair. While Vil and Neige were dressed in their school uniforms, and Crewel in his usual attire (fur coat and all), Mokulau was wearing a short sleeved shirt with a green floral pattern, like the canopy of a jungle, and a stylish pair of leather pants. Around his neck was a leather cord, with a shark tooth pendant, and he tipped a pair of Aviator-style sunglasses up onto his forehead as he strode towards his station. He winked one of his shimmering, almost metallic hazel eyes, flashing a grin of pearly teeth to the audience and flexing one arm in a showy fashion; both of his brawny limbs were covered in a myriad of tattoos, and you could see the beginnings of a similar tattoo on the back of his neck, no doubt trailing down along his spine and shoulders, currently unseen under the cover of his clothes. Mokulau took the microphone from the announcer and addressed the crowd; not only was he built like Ashton Vargas, but his imposing, booming voice you felt sure would give the coach a run for his money. “Alright-Alright-Alright!” he called out, slipping the shades back over his eyes, and pumping his fist into the air. “Who out there is READY?!

The crowd cheered and Maverick laughed boisterously. “Aww, c’mon, you can all do better than that! LEMME HEAR YA!” The man held the mic towards the audience and they cheered even louder. “That’s more like it!” he boomed. “Now, much as I wanna get onto that stage and go wild for you all, that’s not why we’re all here today. I know, I know, I’m the best, it��s a tragedy you won’t hear me…but maybe if we’re lucky, some of these guys and gals we’ve got backstage can almost match! Almost, heh…” Grim’s ears twitched as he heard a sound from behind you both. He looked, then frowned and tapped your shoulder. You looked to see where his paw pointed, and scowled: you could see the glitter of a familiar pair of purple eyes, peeking out from a shadowy corner of the offstage area. However, Taoka’s eyes weren’t focused on you. They were focused on Mokulau. You tried to ignore the strange thief, and refocus attention on the Royal Sword instructor…yet you were keenly aware of his nearby presence the whole time. “Seriously, events like this are really something special,” Mokulau went on, pacing before the judges bar as he continued to address the audience. “Trust me, I’d know: when I was just a kid, livin’ on this very island, I fell in love with music. I could play, I could sing, I was pretty good at it! But, well…let’s just say finding somebody to SUPPORT that music wasn’t easy. I had to leave this place to find a real chance to express my passion, get a scholarship, and eventually become the person you see now…which is, to say, AN AWESOME DUDE.” The audience chortled. Neige giggled. Vil and Crewel looked thoroughly unamused and merely rolled their eyes in unison. “So, anyway, when I found out about a chance to teach at Royal Sword, and to help judge this competition as well, I was hyped! It was a chance to come back to my roots, and to reconnect with something I…well…something I think I lost a long time ago. But we’re not here to hear my drama: we’re here to hear some cool guys try to out-cool yours truly! They’ll probably fail, mind you, BUT the one who gets the closest is gonna go home with somethin’ real special!” Mokulau snapped his fingers. The announcer dashed offstage, then returned with a cart. The audience “oohed” and “ahhed” at what was upon the cart: it looked like a huge trophy cup, made of silver. The handles of the cup arched upwards into a sort of bridge over its mouth…and in the center of the bridge, you saw an ivory-hued, triangular item, with the shape of a fish hook etched into it. “This great silver trophy,” Mokulau declared, “Is topped with my very first guitar pick! Some of my earliest and best concerts were done using that thing…I like to think of it as my way of passing the torch, and a sign of not giving up on your dreams and passions, no matter what they are. Call me sentimental, ha! Trust me, the silver’s worth a lot of money…but that pick? It’s truly priceless. And whoever gets first place in this competition will go home with that shiny puppy in their hands. SO…” He waved one hand extravagantly, and the announcer wheeled the cart and the trophy away. “...I think it’s time I stop yammering your ears off! YOU READY FOR SOME MUSIC?!”  The crowd applauded and called out a resounding “YEAH!” in various forms. “Then let’s get this party started!” howled Mokulau, and gave the mic back to the announcer before rushing to the judge’s station. He sat down with a smirk, crossing his arms and slinging his legs up onto the table in front of him. Vil and Crewel - who sat on either side - cringed and flinched away as he did so. Neige just smiled blithely, clearly unaffected. As the announcer began the proceedings, you realized it was time for you and Grim to get to work.

“Come on,” you whispered to the little imp. “Let’s go.” “Right, Minion,” Grim whispered back…then blinked as he looked past you. “Nya…where’d that purple-haired weirdo go?” You turned and, sure enough, you couldn’t see a single sign of Taoka. “Forget about him,” you sighed, shaking your head and ushering Grim away. “We’ve got a job to do, big guy, let’s move it!” Grim nodded and bounded after you as you each scuttled away to take care of business. Neither of you noticed, as you hurried away, that Taoka hadn’t really left. Purple eyes watched the two of you go, then once again the shadowy sneakthief stepped out of hiding. From his place offstage, he narrowed his eyes, peering over the stage itself towards Mokulau’s cool expression. A strange expression - something that crossed a snarl, a sneer, and a decidedly unpleasant smile all at once - crossed his face. “Well, well, well…been a while since we last met, hasn’t it? If you can call it meeting…” The gloved hand clenched tighter, the fist shaking visibly before Taoka swirled his golden coat and prowled back towards his dressing room. “This time, you won’t be able to ignore me. And to make doubly sure…I’m going to see to it nobody shines like me today.” A slightly unhinged chuckle left the young man. “Then again…way I see it, nobody shines like me at all. But, hey, no harm in remindin’ ‘em of that.”

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“I don’t get it!” squeaked Hop, the blonde dwarf from Royal Sword, as he hurriedly looked around his room. “I had it when I came in!” “I told you to keep a better eye on it!” snapped his friend, Gran, grumpily. “Easy, fellas,” soothed Dominic. “It’s gotta be around seer humswear…I mean, here somewhere!” “I’ll make sure to keep an eye out for it,” you promised with a sigh. “Thanks, Stage Manager,” Hop said, with an apologetic smile, rubbing one arm. “I-I’m really sorry about the trouble.” “Trust me, it’s no trouble,” you said, and left the dressing room. Your smile vanished as soon as you did so. “Nya! I think it’s trouble!” Grim protested, huffishly crossing his arms. “How come nobody here is able to keep track of the important things?!” “I don’t think it’s entirely their fault,” you said, softly, scratching your chin as yourself and your companion patrolled the halls of the backstage reaches, where all the singers and performers were getting geared up or resting after their number. So far, however, those who had gone up hadn’t exactly faced smooth sailing. The first contestant had lost their microphone; as a result, their performance suffered, as they couldn’t be properly heard throughout the ampitheater. It was all downhill from there: another contestant lost an important piece of their outfit, and had to hastily throw on different clothes. Not only did this make them late to their cue, but it lessened the impact of their performance, as the costume had built-in lights that were supposed to go off at a certain point during the song. Now, Hop the Dwarf had lost perhaps the most important thing he or any other performer would need: the instrument he had brought to accompany him. These and more issues had plagued nearly every single person who’d gone up so far. ‘This can’t be a coincidence,” you muttered. “It feels like someone is sabotaging the other performers.” “But why?” “Why else? So they can boost their chances of winning,” you snorted. “Oh, yeah,” Grim murmured, nodding slowly. “I guess that would make sense…right! That’s obvious! I-I totally knew that already! Yep!” You could only let out a groaning sort of sigh. “You really ought to care more,” you grumbled. “This is going to make US look bad just as much as anyone onstage. We’re supposed to be on top of things like this.” “You mean…we might not get the money?” sniffled Grim. “You worry about the cash, I’m going to worry about my grade,” you groused in aggravation. “We’ve got to figure out who’s behind this as soon as we can.”

“Well, right now, I don’t think we’re gonna have a chance,” shrugged Grim. “We’re running around too much!” You grumbled again in reply; you knew that, for once, he was right. You’d have to take care of this issue when the show was over, and report things to security accordingly. But you REALLY didn’t like it. You could only imagine how Vil and Crewel were reacting to all this, and what they’d say if they saw it as poor management on your behalf…honestly, that hurt you more than any worries about your actual welfare. Your highly concerned musings were interrupted when one of the assistant stage managers - they had been assigned, not picked by you - came over to you. “Contestant 23 is about to take the stage,” they said. “Good,” you nodded back, and beckoned Grim to follow you. “Come on, it’s our job to bring Contestant 24 into place. They go on immediately after.” Grim nodded, and the two of you went to Number 24’s room. You knocked, and a polite voice from inside called out, “Come in!” You opened the door and smiled as you peered in on the performer inside. Said performer was a student of Royal Sword. Until this day they had been all but a stranger to you. They were slender and small of frame; their somewhat effete yet clearly strong and muscle-toned features vaguely reminded you of Epel or Lilia: petit and slim, yet tough and resilient all at once. He had skin the same bronze-like tone as Maverick Mokulau’s, and hair done up in dreadlocks. He wore a reddish-pink tank top, with striped tropical patterns on it, and beige trousers, with patchwork badges that resembled some sort of yellow flower or coral. His eyes were a rich chocolate brown, and filled with a warm, friendly light. “Number 24?” you checked, just to be safe. The young man nodded as he stood up, and adjusted his personal microphone. “Name’s Keala,” he greeted, extending a hand towards you. “Keala Cravalho.” “Nice to meet you,” you chuckled. “Nya…technically, you saw each other earlier,” huffed Grim. “Yeah, but we were both in a hurry then,” shrugged Keala, and smiled as he knelt down towards Grim. “Didn’t get a chance to say hi to you, either.” “I’m the Great Grim of Night Raven College!” the imp declared, puffing out his fluffy chest. “And don’t you forget it!” Keala chuckled and reached out to playfully ruffle Grim’s headfur. “I won’t,” he said with a teasing smile. Grim growled and swiped at Keala’s hand, batting it away and blushing beneath his gray fur. He grumbled as he straightened out the fluff of his furry noggin. Keala just chuckled louder and stood up again, raising an eyebrow in your direction. “I didn’t realize you two went to Night Raven. You’re not how I expected a lot of students there to be,” he remarked. “Eh. For me, it’s just a place to stay. And learn, I suppose,” you shrugged. This was, in fact, the truth: while you had your own school pride, you’d never felt the intense bitterness towards Royal Sword others at NRC did. Maybe it was because you weren’t originally from this world. “Come on,” you said, and ushered Keala out into the hall. “The act before you is about to go on. It’s time to get moving.”

“Oh-oh, wait a minute!” exclaimed Keala, and hurried back into their room. You frowned as you watched him check the locker of his dressing room. Keala’s smile fell, a look of confusion and then worry on his face. “Is something wrong?” you checked, already dreading the answer. “No,” murmured Keala…then shook his head and spoke a bit louder. “No, no, it’s fine. I’ve just, uh…just gotta get my backup plan real quick, hold up…” You and Grim shared a look, mouthing “backup plan?” to each other. Whatever it was, Keala fetched it quickly, tucking something into his pocket. He then nodded and smiled, indicating he was ready to go. Smiling back, you led him out of the backstage area and towards the main stage itself. “You nervous?” you asked as the three of you hastened to your place. “More than a little,” admitted Keala, brushing some of his dreadlocks from his face and giving an anxious sort of smile. “I’ll be okay, though.” “I’m sure you will be,” you smiled back. “You’ve got this.” “Not as much as OUR students have got it,” mumbled Grim. You made sure to jerk his tail for that one, giving him a strict look of reproach. Keala just sniggered at the exchange. Soon, the three of you were in view of the stage. Contestant 22 had just left, and Contestant 23 - in all his purple-and-gold glory - was now stalking onto the stage himself. “Welcome! And what’s your name?” you heard Neige’s voice call out. “Taoka Latronis,” came the somewhat snide reply. “And if I’ve prepared the way I think I have, I’m about to rock your world.” “Well, aren’t we confident?” Vil smirked, steepling his hands and leaning back slightly in his chair. “I try to be, Housewarden,” Taoka replied teasingly. “If you think being one of our students is going to help your chances, puppy, you are sorely mistaken,” Divus Crewel thought to point out. Maverick Mokulau just yawned. “Enough yammering!” he called out, and waved a meaty mitt through the air. “You’re here to perform, so perform. You can’t do anything more wrong than what some of the other clowns so far have.” Taoka’s smirk took on a slightly sinister, sneaky bend.

“Trust me, I know,” he practically purred, then seemed to shake off the aura of darkness. He straightened his back and adjusted the guitar strapped about his golden-clad shoulders. “This song is a short one, so you all know.” “Short doesn’t mean bad,” shrugged Neige, cheerfully. Taoka gave him a quick nod, then took a breath, closing his eyes as he tried to focus on his music. “Ugh…I don’t even wanna HEAR what this guy has to play,” grumbled Grim, and plugged up his fiery ears. “Hey, everyone here put a lot of work into what they’re doing,” soothed Keala. “Give him a chance.” Admittedly, you were on Grim’s side, given Taoka’s behavior…but once his fingers began to work on the guitar, you soon changed your mind. The tune he played was pounding and deep; like something primal, waiting to burst free from his very soul. Discordant, jarring jangles of the guitar strings were accompanied by melodic tones, the strong strumming rising in intensity and pitch with every couple of lines. Taoka kept his eyes closed, his expression filled with a sort of melancholy pain. This sensation matched perfectly with the lyrics he sang, which held a dark, conflicted message… “How you turn my world, you precious thing,” he crooned. “You starve and near-exhaust me. Everything I’ve done, I’ve done for you! I move the stars for no one. You’ve run so long, run so far!” Suddenly, Taoka’s eyes shot open. They fixed on Mokulau. There was a fiery intensity in them as he continued his song… “Your eyes can be so cruel! Just as I can be so cruel! Though I do believe in you! Yes I do!” Taoka’s eyes softened, and turned up towards the sky. His voice carried a shaky tone, as if trying not to cry. “Live without the sunlight. Love without a heartbeat…” His eyes closed again, just as they had begun to look misty. He turned his head downward again, as his fingers brushed the final, somber notes from the guitar. Huskily, he uttered the final lyrics… “I…I…can’t live…Within You.”

A few more plinking, plunking strums, and the lament came to a close. You let out a breath you didn’t realize you had been holding in. “That wasn’t too bad,” murmured Keala behind you. “Is it over?” muttered Grim, who had his ears covered the whole time. You just rolled your eyes. Meanwhile, the four judges and the audience behind them applauded. The bitterness that had been written all over Taoka’s face was erased as he smiled hopefully at the competition masters. “So?” he asked, as the applause died down, sounding perhaps a little too playfully sure of himself. “Will it pass?” “It passes for me!” chirped Neige LeBlanche. “You really put a lot of effort into that one, I could tell! There was a lot of emotion, a lot of passion, in what you were doing. It wasn’t very long, but you really sold it to me.You oughta proud of yourself!” Taoka’s broad grin indicated that he was. “Yes,” yawned Vil. “Well, unfortunately we can’t all be so forgiving.” Taoka’s grin fell in an instant. “You may be one of my dorm-mates, but - as both your dorm leader and one of your judges here - I have no choice to be critical,” Vil went on. You couldn’t help but smile slightly to yourself with mild amusement: Vil was ALWAYS critical, regardless. “The emotion you put into the song was truly palpable,” he commended. “I can tell this is a tune you are passionate about, and you did your best accordingly. HOWEVER, I feel you should have chosen a longer piece, to make a bigger impact, just for a start.” “I agree,” nodded Divus Crewel. “Furthermore, while your voice is good, there is a sort of rasping quality to it I couldn’t help but notice. In some places, it is quite effective, but in others, it makes your voice sound weak; I would strongly recommend working on developing more clarity to your vocals.” In a matter of moments, Taoka’s expression had gone from almost smug to looking rather nervous. He turned to face Mokulau. Maverick was looking up at him thoughtfully over the rim of his sunglasses. Finally, the judge spoke. “Sorry, kid, but I can guarantee you aren’t making it to the finals,” he grunted.

You swore you could hear Taoka’s heart shatter. “I didn’t mind the voice, and the song choice seemed fine by me,” explained the tattooed man. “No, my problem stemmed from the strings. Were those discordant sounds I heard intentional?” “Some of them,” peeped Taoka, in a shockingly meek tone. “Well, there’s your biggest issue,” snorted Mokulau, tipping his glasses up again to cover his eyes. “You were able to fake it to the end, but if you can’t play the tune properly, don’t compete over it.” Someone in the audience muttered a quiet, “Ouch.” You couldn’t agree with them more. “Is there anything you want to say before we move on?” Neige asked, politely, a sympathetic smile on his kind face. Taoka gulped. He looked like he’d been kicked in the stomach. You saw him lift his gloved hand. He looked at it with a strange sort of contemplation…then curled the fingers into a fist and shook his head. Once more, you noted the odd way one of his fingers didn’t curl as much as the rest. Suddenly, you weren’t so sure that was just a genetic peculiarity. “Thank you very much,” Neige said. “I still think you did very well! Keep up the good work!” Taoka gave no indication he had even heard what LeBlanche said. He stalked off towards the backstage area. He cast one last hate-filled glance over his shoulder at Maverick - the rock-star-turned-teacher didn’t seem to notice - then pushed someone out of the way as he stormed off into the shadows, golden coat fluttering behind him.

“Nya…talk about a guy who can’t take criticism,” Grim hissed. “Forget about him,” you sighed, then smiled at Keala as the announcer called for the next contestant. “Now’s your time to shine.” “Thanks,” whispered Keala with a grateful smile. He tossed his dreadlocks out of his face with a flourish of one hand, and sauntered onstage. “Greetings,” Vil welcomed, with a respectful sort of bow of his head. “We’re glad to have you with us today.” “I’m glad to be here!” Keala said, and gave a salute to Maverick. “Hey there, Mr. Mokulau! Hi, Neige.” Both of the Royal Sword members waved in greeting. “You know them?” Crewel inquired. “Neige is in my class, and Mr. Mokulau’s one of my teachers,” Keala replied. “Don’t worry: I don’t expect either of them to go easy on me.” “Well, you can be sure of that with one of us,” chuckled Mokulau. “Hey! I can be strict!” pouted Neige, childishly. “It’s just harder for me!” The two teachers chuckled. Vil just groaned and pinched his brow; it was as if every word LeBlanche uttered was painful to his mind. Then he looked up again at the newest competitor. “What is your name?” “Keala Cravalho.” “I don’t see any instrument on you,” Schoenheit observed, raising one immaculate eyebrow. A brief look of anxiety crossed the young man’s face. “Heh heh…yeeeeah, about that…” “Did you forget it?” Crewel asked, blandly. “Oh, no!” insisted Keala. “I brought it with me, but it…doesn’t seem to be in my dressing room anymore.” You and Grim shared a worried look. Whoever was taking things from the contestants had struck again. “Just like with Hop,” you heard Neige murmur sadly. “What do you plan to do then?” wondered Professor Crewel. “Sing a-capella?” Keala’s anxiety gave way to a sly smile. “Actually,” he said, and pulled his cell phone from his pocket, waggling it in the air. “I came prepared. See, my grandmother always taught me to have a backup plan, in case things went wrong. So, in case something happened to my instrument, I actually recorded a full instrumental for the song, so I could still have my own accompaniment!” “I’m impressed,” admitted Vil. “Such foresight would have helped a couple of contestants today.” “Not every contestant knew my grandma,” winked Keala. “If somebody could help me set this up to the speakers…”

You took that liberty personally. You scampered onstage with Grim, and the pair of you quickly hooked up the phone to the speakers, and reworked the mic, so that Keala’s music and voice wouldn’t bury each other or bust the audio levels. It thankfully did not take very long, and soon yourself and your trident-tailed companion hurried off again. You gave a final thumbs-up to the judges and Keala alike, and high-fived (well…high-pawed) Grim as you vanished back into the wings. “Ready now?” Mokulau checked. “Yeah. I’m ready,” said Keala, and looked back at the judges. “This is a song my grandma taught me. It’s based on the legend of a princess who used to live right here on Sage’s Island. Maybe some of you will know the legend.” “Well, let’s hear it!” cheered Neige. Keala nodded and tapped the play button on the recording before hastily scurrying to center stage. He had just a few seconds to breathe and collect himself before the music started. A slow build gave him a chance to envelope himself in the moment; you saw his face relax…and his eyes slowly reopened. He stared off into the distance, as if looking out towards the horizon…and began to sing… “She’s been staring at the edge of the water, long as she can remember, never really knowing why. She’s wished she could be the perfect daughter, but she comes back to the water, no matter how hard she tries.” The music began to build, a pumping, determined, unstoppable quality to the music. Keala’s voice strengthened in turn, from the gentle notes of a storyteller to something more powerful as he began to stride across the stage, singing directly to the audience. “Every turn she takes! Every trail she tracks! Every path she makes! Every road leads back to the place she knows where she cannot go: where she longs to be…” Keala tilted his head back as if soaking in the sunlight from above…listening to the distant waves upon the beach… “And she says…‘see the line where the sky meets the sea? It calls me! And no one knows how far it goes! With the wind in my sail on the sea, behind me, one day I’ll know! But if I go, there’s just no telling How Far I’ll Go.’” You glanced towards Grim to see his reaction. The imp seemed mesmerized, mouth slightly agape, eyes sparkling like a hypnotized kitten. You giggled, and then looked towards the judges. Mokulau had lowered his sunglasses; he was watching with very intense interest. Neige was beaming from ear to ear. Even Vil and Professor Crewel had raised their brows in apparent surprise, as the golden voice continued its song… “She knows everybody on the island seems so happy on the island! Everything is by design. Oh, she knows everybody on the island has a role on the island! She says, ‘Maybe I can roll with mine!’ She could lead with pride! She could make them strong! She’ll be satisfied if she plays along! But a voice inside sings a different song: ‘What is wrong with me?!’” As the question was asked in the lyrics, you caught sight of something else. On the opposite side of the stage, Taoka had suddenly reappeared. The disgraced youth’s eyes were exceedingly wide, and his jaw seemed to have fallen onto his chest. His skin had even turned a shade or two paler. He didn’t just seem surprised. He seemed downright SHOCKED. You couldn’t help but feel a mild twinge of satisfaction at that, even as the next chorus began to roll off Keala’s tongue… “‘See the light where it shines on the sea? It’s blinding! But no one knows how deep it goes! And it seems like it’s calling out to me: so come find me! And let me know what’s beyond that line. Will I cross that line?’” The key changed, and the music kicked up a notch. Keala’s voice soared straight to the heavens, eliciting cheers from the audience. No longer did he sing in the third person, the words coming directly from his heart as he called out the final chorus… “There’s a line where the sky meets the sea! It calls me! And no one knows how far it goes! If the wind in my sail on the sea stays behind me, one day I’ll know…HOW FAR I’LL GO!”

The final words ended in a long, powerful, strong note, and Keala’s dreadlocks whipped forward as he finished with a sharp bow, the music crescendoing and coming to a halt at the same time. The audience applauded louder than they had that whole time. All four judges clapped, and you could hear Neige laughing and cheering, “That was so great!” You looked towards Grim with a smirk. He still looked hypnotized. You snapped your fingers in front of his face. He mewled and shook his head, blinking at you blearily. “Sounded pretty good, huh?” you teased. Grim frowned and huffed, looking quite embarrassed.

“I guess so,” he muttered. “For somebody from Royal Sword.” You just scritched him behind the ears in response. By the time he started purring, the crowd had calmed down. “I don’t even have words for that!” Neige declared. “That’s gotta be one of the best performances I’ve seen and heard in a while!” “I find it hard to disagree,” Vil said, although it sounded like he VERY much wanted to, if only BECAUSE it was Neige. “While I personally feel your sentimentality was a bit overwrought, your voice is pure and your recording did nothing to negatively influence your performance.” “I second all that. And quite clearly the audience loves you,” added Professor Crewel. “Bravo, you daaahling puppy. Bravo, indeed!” Keala gave all three a grateful, speechless nod, then looked towards Mokulau. His eyes were filled with a sort of cautious optimism. Mokulau grinned back and nodded before giving a thumbs-up. “You made me proud, kid,” was all he said. “And I bet your grandma feels the same way.” Several in the audience clapped again. You could actually see Keala’s large brown eyes go slightly misty. “Thank you,” he almost whispered. “You’re welcome!” Maverick sang back. Keala bowed to the judges, and scurried back towards you. You laughed as he whispered a hasty thanks to you, as well, and waved farewell to him. You then glanced back towards the stage to see the next contestant. As you did so, however, your smile faded. Taoka was still standing on the opposite end There were no mortal words to describe the utter and complete look of hatred on his face as he looked first in the direction Keala had gone, then at Mokulau. Then, with a snarl and a sneer, he disappeared once again.

“Come on, Minion!” Grim yowled, tugging at your leg. “We still have work to do!” “Coming,” you whispered, and hesitantly followed Grim, glancing back repeatedly to where you had seen Taoka. You had a very bad feeling inside your chest…and if your time in this world had taught you anything, it was to trust those instincts. You wished it had also taught you to learn what those instincts specifically meant.

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Afternoon was beginning to change into evening when the competition came to a close. You had been told who the winner was, and now waited with them backstage, ready to usher them on at the cue. The Announcer stepped to the center of the stage, and declared that the time had come to present the silver trophy - topped with Maverick Mokulau’s treasured pick - to the first place contender. Naturally, Maverick himself stepped up onstage to present the award. The announcer hurried off to wheel the cart onstage once more. The other three judges all stood a pace or two behind Maverick, hands behind their backs, as if at attention, patiently waiting for him to make the presentation. “I think my fellow judges and I can agree that picking a winner for this contest was pretty tough. There were a lot of hiccups today in some of the performances, but these kids…they knew their stuff, and they clearly all worked hard,” he chuckled. “There’s only room for one proper winner, though…and that winner is…KEALA CRAVALHO!” You grinned and gave Keala a pat on the back. “Go!” you whispered, and the Royal Sword student’s dreadlocks bounced as he jogged onstage. He shook hands with Professor Crewel, Neige LeBlanche, and Vil Schoenheit (who visibly wiped his hands on his trouser legs afterwards). Then he approached Maverick Mokulau. The rock star tipped his sunglasses back onto his forehead, his hazel eyes filled with pride as he lifted the trophy from the cart. “Congratulations, kid,” he smiled. “You’ve really earned this today.” Keala beamed, and reached to accept the trophy… …And that, it seemed, was the moment fate chose to make everything go wrong. ZAM! Suddenly, there was a blinding flash of golden light. It flooded the entire stage, and even seared into the retinas of some in the audience. Gasps and yelps of surprise and alarm sounded from all corners. “What IS this?!” you heard Professor Crewel screech, as he shielded his eyes with one fur-shrouded arm, recoiling from the flash. “Trouble,” you heard Grim hiss at your side. You couldn’t agree more: the light soon vanished… …And the whole crowd in attendance gasped in horror. Maverick Mokulau gulped, absolutely stunned…as he looked at his now empty hands. The trophy had vanished too!

To Be Continued in Part 3...

[minimeowsom]

Moonlight Chicken just ended and i can't deal with it.

So i cried, not today no today i laughed and squicked mainly. But yesterday or last week, the last four weeks of Moonlight Chicken were gut wrenching sadness. And just two weeks ago I posted a Post saying I was ready to throw hands if Li Ming and Heart don't get a happy ending. I was willing to trait everybody else's happiness to make sure the babies are happy. But now I think I can't stay with that. but more on that later. 

JimWen

So I saw a very good post about people not being able to really care for JimWen because they can't relate to them. And I agree, I am , let's say, around 10 years younger than them. I didn't have to deal with the struggles they had to deal with yet, they feel genuine and tragic to me, but not relatable. This is in no way meant to discredit Earth or Mix Acting, they were really good in this, I could feel especially Jims Hurt and anger a lot. But what I am trying to say is I don't feel like I am able to say something useful about their Relationship or characters because I don't know what I would do in their situation, I will leave that to people who can. moving on.

LiMingHeart

 LiMingHeart the Heart and Light of this show, especially in the first seven episodes they were the light to everybody else's darkness.They of course both had their on set of problems and struggles do deal with, but between Li Ming feeling misunderstood and Heart not feeling heard at all, whenever they were together they were shining, loving and supporting one another. I would say as a couple i can relate to them the most, (alan is also a strong contender here but we talk about him later) I am just like one and a half years older then someone who is just finishing highschool, and i had to explain to my parents that i have no idea what i wanna do after school, and coming from an academic household that is not what they wanna hear. me going to university was always a given to them. Li Ming's main conflict with Jim revolves around a similar situation. I can feel how misunderstood he feels, especially because Fourth is an exceptional young actor, he is so good at conveying his feelings through his eyes. I am baffled every time. 

And Heart with his parents just breaks my heart every time. The way they needed some eighteen year old kid , come in and show them how to love their son is so sad. But we love to see some character development and how in the end they not only learned sign language for him, but allowed him to go to the states with Li Ming.Gemini as Heart was fantastic too, the boy had three lines in this show, so his lines were his facial expression, the way heart signed (because we didn't get subtitles for what he said either) and his body language. And Gemini made you feel it all, the happiness with Li Ming, or the anger and frustration at his parents for not trying to learn for him.  I loved their story and the way they discovered first love between them, and as I said I was ready to let everybody else suffer to make sure they stay happy…. but then someone just went straight into my heart.

AlanGaipa

Alan just struck a chord with me. Not two Weeks ago I got out of a four year Relationship my Partner ended (for me) out of nowhere and I still have him in my life, because we have the same friend circle and we don't want to break it because of our breakup. So yeah how do you deal with your partner still being there but not really being there. So from the moment we got introduced to AlanWens story I felt with him, yes he had no right to act like Wen cheated, which he didn't, but Wen didn't really help the situation by continuing to sleep with someone who was obviously desperately trying to hold on to him. But somewhere along the story I just wanted something bright in Alan's life. not just for him, but for me , someone to help us heal. And who better than a boy who has so much love to give, who needs someone that recognizes that love and is willing to give just as much love back to him. Because we know Alan gives so much to his Boyfriend, maybe a bit too much for Wen but I am sure Gaipa can take it, and respond with the same amount.

This is also very much swayed by my love for FirstKhao and everything they do. Khao is such a talented actor when it comes to his emotions and his feelings. It is the first time I cried for a TV series in my life, when I saw him breaking down in the hospital after his mother died. 

And the way First played Alan gave me the Feeling of looking in an emotional mirror, because yes i know what he feels like and how hard it is to let go of five years of love.

But in the end we got crumbs of what their flirting and future might look like and it was enough for me to fall in love with them and feel like Alan will for sure find Happiness in him and maybe just maybe a Geipa will walk into my life too. 

At first i thought for sure they wouldn't give Gaipa and Alan a story, i was sure they would just go off to heal on their own, because we had nothing after Episode 6 and normally the show takes time to develop something as big as a Relationship, but maybe that's what they tried to tell us, not every Happiness takes as long as Jim and Wen, maybe you can meet the cute chicken seller boy, get his number, and ask him on a date in a couple of days. 

Something i thought after watching yesterdays and todays Episode was that they put it in because it is FirstKhao we are talking about, their friendship and especially their success as a couple, but that is not true, they filmed Moonlight chicken while the Eclipse Premiered, before First and Khao became the “Powercouple” they are today. Like they let the scene in where First cried when Khao sang, because that is what it was, because it was not in the script, First is just a huge softie for Khao.So I am even happier about the fact that in the end even both people that were left behind by Jim and Wen found happiness in each other.

Something Else i wanted to add was a very interesting post about the color coding of the show. Alan is seen in dark and Blue colors, taking it with him wherever he goes and even putting it on other people, it shows his sadness and loneliness even more, but the moment he meets Gaipa at the Funeral he starts to glow golden like the rest of the characters in love.

And as he leaves Gaipa and the Funeral and goes to leave it comes back, we then again see him in yellow and gold again with Gaipa at the bank and the restaurant, because Gaipa brings the light slowly back in his dark world. 

Conclusion:

Honestly 10/10 would recommend, for everybody, not only BL or Drama Fans, just everybody, i am probably gonna force it on one of my movie nerd friends, just because of the Filmography and the superb acting in this series