#I haven't read it and probably won't until I've finished writing this

[atreuloonynew]

So I wrote another chapter of my riko redemption, riko x seth fic, if y'all wanna check it out. 

[knightyoomyoui]

TWICE Sana x M/F Reader - "I Want It That Way"

I'M BACK. After 3 months of no update, your one and only Knight Yoo-Myoui returns to bring you readers more stories in my book. Author's been in a really tough situation especially last month, but that still ain't gonna be enough to take out my passion and motivation to continue writing for both mine and your entertainment. I'm gonna continue this as long as I can. However, from now on; please understand and expect that I won't be updating very often like weekly or everyday as before. Studies is my current priority as of the moment but I promise that I will always update yall. Actually though, this new kind of pacing for both my writing procedure and publishing has somehow lessen the pressure in me. I'm really liking it so far, makes me comfortable. This story is requested by ShaShaSha029 BUT..., sorry Sha because I made some changes on your requested plot hehe. I already made the same concept from my previous works so I used your other request from another member to come up with something new that I haven't done yet. And as for the other member you requested to me, I'll give you a brand new plot for her. I hope you and the readers will like this. Enjoy reading! STREAM "I GOT YOU" and "ONE SPARK" MVs btw!

"I'm going home, guys. I'll leave the office to you all."

YN/LN, a current 4th year student from Cheongnamdong Polytechnic University and the campus' ongoing president of the student council, has just finished your tasks for today and is now about to depart from their office and send your goodbyes to your fellow members kindly to end the day on a positive note.

"Be safe on your way home, Pres!"

"You too."

You continued walking after sending him all the bright greetings, but before passing to your own cubicle and reaching the door, it opened. You then heard some footsteps behind it until a familiar figure made its presence known in front of you.

You watched your classmate, friend, and the secretary of their council, Yoo Janghoon, peeking at the door with a weird smile before you find him standing on your way.

Janghoon then approached YN.

"Seems like you're about to leave."

"Yeah." You nodded. " What's with your smile in your face? You look like you just saw something amusing.", he said in a judgmental look.

"Not with my own eyes, but the words I've heard are enough to picture her on mind." Janghoon smirked and bounced his brows.

"Her? You're into hunting chicks again?"

"Idiot, I have a girlfriend now, ofcourse I'm not." Janghoon mocked YN as he was about to throw a punch. "But seriously though, not even me could deny that it really does interest me."

"Why, what's going on out there?"

"Well, I've heard from my acquaintances from the other courses that there's a newly transferred female student here in the campus earlier after the class break."

"That late?"

"Yeah, I was a bit confused too but they said the professor just let it passed because they said that her documents were finalized at the last minute so that's why." YN hummed to react.

"And would you like to enlighten me what's so interesting with this random transferee student? I mean, no offense. Welcome aboard to the university but... what's special?"

"Dude, I'm telling you, it's not just "random", this girl was a legit bombshell. Based from how they described her, it was like when she stepped on the room, they felt like there was a legit goddess that got manifested into reality."

"And that's it?"

"Y-yeah... but you know and I know, dude. Our university has been missing it's "queen" for quite some time now. And probably the students are making noise about it is because they see a huge potential on her."

"Okay. Well, I do hope she doesn't feel overwhelmed with the attention she's about to receive on the next days of her stay here."

"But we're here as the council officers to take control, right?"

"Exactly." you nodded. "Anyways, gotta go now. I still have a family dinner not to miss."

"Alright, take care pres."

"You too, sec."

You left the office and the campus with a curiosity forming in your heart and mind on the identity of this woman that has been the center of the gossips you were unaware of due to how busy you are on the duties.

Arrived at home, you entered and got welcomed by your mother who is preparing their table for a lovely dinner tonight while your father is busy watching basketball on the living room.

"Good evening, mom."

"Good eve, YN. Tired?", she said while placing the plates on the table.

"Not that much but I would be glad to rest as always.", you spoke with a timid smile.

"Perfect, meal's coming right up real soon. Join your father there, okay?"

"Okay. Thanks, mom."

You walked near to your father and greeted him courteously. You sat beside him and laid your back comfortably on the soft cushion of the couch to release all the pent-up exhaustion your body has consumed on today's packed class schedule.

Minutes later, your mother commands both you and your father to position yourselves on the seats. Each grabbing their own meal, all of you started praying first before taking your first bites and swallow on such a delicious food.

"Uhm, dear. We want to talk to you about something." Your mother inserted a topic to be discussed.

"Sure, mom. I'll be listening. What is it about?"

"It's like a business talk but this also concerns about your personal life too, YN which we much rather prioritize." Your father said after swallowing his throat. "We meet up with our partners on the company regarding this and we all come to an agreement."

"Agreement to what?"

"Me and your mother are placing you in an arrangement contract with their child."

"Wait, come again?"

"Arrangement contract. It means we set you up with someone as your age to date and marry one day, and we figured out that to strengthen the connection between us, we decided to-"

"Yes, wait. I know that part, dad but... why need to? Wasn't it too early? I get that you want me to have a wife and a family someday but... it's not one of my priorities so far.", you complained.

"YN, please do understand that your mother and I ain't be getting younger as time goes on. Someday, you'll be alone, and we just wanted to give you another family that you would be glad to remain and... hopefully, to remember us like how we raised you from the beginning."

"But wasn't this too fast? You're making me rush things."

Both sides went silent, as the father felt guilty also for how true your words are.

"It's my life. You may be the one who gave me that but I developed and earned a right to decide what's right for my future."

"We know, son... but we had no choice. It's for the sake also of our business. You know that we have to keep it to the mountain top so that we don't have our efforts of raising it go to waste, especially when this is the main reason how me and your mother were able to give you a better life that you deserve. And some way or another, you will be for sure, the one who will take the mantle and own my properties. You can use it also to raise your family easier."

"We are not forcing you to do this, YN. Please, we just wanted to inform you and talk about this because you also have a side and opinion to be heard. Whatever your answer may be, we will respect it. We are just suggesting, but hopefully you can consider it, honey." Your mother's soft voice effectively kept you at ease more.

Taking deep breaths and a short length of silence to contemplate, you looked at them both as you made your choice. "Fine. This is because I love you both and I owe you two everything. I'm doing it."

They both smiled in relief. "Thank you for this, son/daughter."

"No problem. So... can you tell me more about this contract?"

"Well it's simple, an arranged contract but we requested to have you and the girl we chose to spend 30-days or let's say a month to get to know each other and figure things out if you two would believe that everything will work out as a couple." Your father explained.

"And who's the girl that you guys have prepared for me?"

"They have an only child just like us, and it's an easier idea to place her because as we learned, their daughter is currenly in search of finding somebody to love."

"Sadly, we're unalike."

"But she may be able to change your mind, on whatever that hold your heart back. You accepted the offer, now you just have to see how she really is, but we're certainly sure that she's good just like her parents."

"And what's her name?"

"We haven't been introduced nor asked for her name, but from what we know, her nickname should be "Minatozaki", and is Japanese. She was also studying now at the same campus as yours."

"I'll try to look for her and maybe we can talk there privately."

"Whatever you want, YN. Just keep us updated okay?"

"Noted." You replied before everyone returned on focusing to finish their foods.

The next day, you were a bit irritated from how the discussion last night distracts you in the middle of your duty. You couldn't concentrate at the curiousity that dwells inside of you.

So you decided to to take a break outside. You encountered a vacant spot to breathe some fresh air and drink at the iced coffee you prepared on your tumbler as you roam your eyes around at your surroundings.

That's where you spotted some group of students huddling around at a spot near the bulletin board, as if they're being crazy or attentive at something.

Eager to find out the rucus, you approached the scenario and tried to peek around, and there you noticed a female student entertaining the other fellow students by asking her randomly and even asking for some pictures like she is a celebrity.

As she turned around, her long chestnut colored hair flips around as if it denied the gravity, her side profile appeared, until it all fully rotated to have her face evident at you for the first time.

And my oh my the rumors shared by your secretary were true.

No wonder why she was already popular, she does look magnificent, enough to be mistaken as a famous personality.

Your eyes couldn't leave the sight of her just doing everything even in such bare minimum if movements that still effortlessly made her very attractive. Thankfully, there's your boy distracting you as you snapped back when you felt a shoulder wrapped on your neck.

"You finally met her." Janghoon said, smirking at you. "From what I heard earlier, the exchange student's name's Minatozaki Sana. She's a foreigner, a Japanese to be specific."

"Minatozaki?" Your thoughts murmured. Contemplating if you heard it right, but that was the same surname your father was tasked you to find, and she even has the same nationality.

Having exchange students in your campus are very rare.

You are flabbergasted as you slowly realize that... this woman is going to be the one you'll date and marry.

Unconsciously, you turned around at Janghoon with your forehead crumpled and mouth slightly gaped.

"What? Did I say something wrong?"

"Oh n-no. Not-thing." You shook your head swiftly. Returning your gaze back at her, you couldn't believe it at all that your parents and her friends does picked a perfect girl for you.

But you wondered if it could be said the same about you.

Hours later, Sana who was about to enjoy her recess, instead went to the council office to meet the president, as per the classmates told her after being tasked to do so.

She stepped in front of the door that says "Student Council Office, knock twice before entering". She followed and slowly pushed the doorknob. A person sitting at the far end of the room, looking busy on his desk greeted her.

As the door closed, it alarmed the president that the person is now here for a scheduled conversation, only that when you raised your head, you looked at her having a shocked reaction.

Sana stares at the reveal of this mysterious person that runs the entire student government of the campus. Flashbacks began to run back into her mind, slowly making her upset.

"Thank you for agreeing to come here and t-"

"Am I looking at this very clearly?" Sana immediately spoke.

"Pardon?"

"You? Out of everyone here... was chosen to become a leader?"

"W-what? Settle down, miss. I think you n-"

"A representative figure for everyone, and I get to be under your orders around here?" Sana chuckled bitterly. "I didn't know that even after years later, we'll still have our paths crossing onto each other despite how I wanted to never meet you in my life again."

"D-do we know each other?"

Sana scoffed as she looked at you ridiculously. "Ofcourse, how could you recognize me. First of all, I was just a complete nothing to you. A plaything of your cruel antics and delinquent actions. And second, I'm not the same girl you used to belittle everyday."

You furrowed your eyebrows as you looked at her intently. "W-what... you..."

"Still doesn't ring a bell? Oh, how about this. The name Minatozaki Sana? That fat nerdy girl back in elementary that you used to bully so hard in our 8th year that forced her to transfer to other school. How about that?"

Your eyes sprung open as you instantly remember the name and that student you used to include in one of your prime victims in your dark past.

That description of her past self brought you back to the times when you remembered looking for her first to rather mock, annoy, or play with her until her feelings broke and look helpless.

You were a bully before in elementary days, and she was your classmate back then. But that was all only the past now as you are now a changed person, with all the better and positive things that came into your life had taught you more valuable and nice things to consider yourself reevaluating your personality.

But it looks like it could tell the opposite for Sana's part.

"I remember you now, Sana. And... please, let me tell you right now that I'm not the same person you used to despise before."

"Do you really think I'll be fooled easily by that?" Sana retorted. "We just met after what... 7 years and you're supposed to have me believing that when in fact, I still look at you as that same horrific figure I never should've want to see again, but yet here you are."

Sana still didn't took a seat. She walked around and observed the room. You were a bit relieved that all of your council members are absent in this tense confrontation. "What a hypocrisy it is to have you getting involved in an organization that focuses on student rights when in fact, you have a record of violating it before. Shouldn't be a student fitting for that must be... clean?"

"Sana, believe me or not, I changed. I wouldn't even dare to take this position if I'm not sincere for it, and I'm not forcing you to believe me."

"Oh, ofcourse you should. Because I really don't buy everything that comes into your mind not until I see it" Sana shook her head and smugged. "Maybe it'll change my mind of me planning to expose you from every-"

"Wait! You can't be serious?"

"Oh indeed I am." Sana clicked her tongue. "You ruined me before, but here I am who helped myself and from people I loved to become this better version of mine to stand here in front of you, I'm going to get you this time, YN. I'm going to make you feel what is it like being... excluded."

She leaned forward on the desk, staring at you sharply and observing your nervous expression. "But...if there's some sort of a miracle that... you did changed. Then you're going to prove it on me. Make me convinced that this YN I hate with every fiber of my being is... gone."

"What if I tell you that you already have a chance to make me?"

"And that is?"

"Have you heard about an arrangement contract from your parents?"

"Y-yeah... but they don't tell me who it is because- WAIT" Sana quickly lunged back away from you. "Please tell me who I'm thinking is correct."

"Sorry to tell you but I was just in denial as you are yesterday."

"Oh God." Sana poured out the biggest disappointment she felt in her entire life so far. "W-why does my fate has to be very unlucky everytime when it's about you? Me being in an arranged contract with you? I think I have to vomit."

"Wait! But you said you want me to prove that I changed?"

"And you really think I want it this way?" Sana looked at you disgusted. "Being as this fabled student council president or just a random student from me would be fine but... YOU AS MY FIANCE? That won't do, mister." Sana swayed her pointing finger. "Unfortunately, the answer would be NO. Now please, I have to go already. I still have a lunch to take before I lose my appetite."

Sana walked away from you and left the room unbotheredly. You sat there, back falling flat on your swivel chair. Your hands caressed your hair as you reacted unbelievably and stunned that this heavily improved Sana that you used to know many years before has returned to actually be your woman, but unfortunately, her hatred for you still lives on her till this day.

Her opposal didn't worked however, as Sana tried to request later during dinner, she was informed by her parents that the contract can only be cancelled after 30-days for the people to finally reassure their decision.

She mentioned that YN and her have a bad history in the past, but instead her parents reasoned out that maybe YN has changed and it will not hurt to give another chance. If only they know what the real reason it is, but Sana was clearly affected by their suggestion because honestly, Sana is a forgiving soft type of person.

Still, confident that she's satisfied with her answer, she became impatient and hated being with YN more.

Meanwhile, you shared to your mother about how the unlikedness of you and Sana's interests about the marriage arrangement in a deatiled manner.

"We met and had a talk, but... it wasn't as proper and civil as I expected because, I was surprised that she confessed something very familiar to me. Something that I've been trying to get it out on my head. Something that I wanted to let go for a long time."

"What was she to you before?"

"A nuisance, even though she wasn't doing even wrong. I look at her before thinking it wasn't right for her to be in this type of high class campus that I study at too, but then I figured out that me ending up bullying and making her emotional and mental state suffer is way worse than she is."

You flinched when your mother slapped you in the head. "What??? How could you bully someone?! Is that how we raised you?"

"Mom, wait ofcourse no... but, I was just made to be like that because of what happened to us, you know that!"

Your mother became speechless and a glimpse of pity became visible to you. "But it's all good now, mom. I'm not like that anymore, I'm telling you.  And that's what I should've just wanted to prove to Sana but... I understand that she won't let me anymore. I broke her too much, I can't let it happen again."

Stepping closer in front of you, she placed her hands gently on your shoulders to massage them and make your ease down. "Even I was mad and disappointed that you once turned into that type of guy you never should be, but I know from the bottom of my heart that you will always be a good kid of mine because that's how I raised you to be. You just got affected too much by our struggles before. And I believe you always, YN. The only thing I can do now for you to support you, and that is for you to keep on moving forward and never stop to make Sana forgive you, alright?"

"I will. Thanks, mom."

She patted you on the cheek. "Goodluck, okay? You have a month to do it."

----------

"Okay, class dismissed. Group 1, remember to prepare your report by next week okay?"

"Yes, prof!", the students who are part of the group that the professor mentioned chanted.

The professor left the room, leaving the students have the freedom to eat lunch during their vacant time.

"Sana, cmon! Did you bring a lunch with you?", one of Sana's classmates asked her while she's clearing her table.

"No, I'm gonna buy for today."

"Nice, let's go!"

Sana brought her wallet and cellphone with her, joins her newfound friends named Miyeon and Sullyoon as they make their way out to the classroom.

However, as they were about to, a figure suddenly pops out of the doorway, stopping their tracks. The two classmates of hers had a visible shock in their faces unlike to Sana, her bright mood quickly shrank down into a gloomy one.

"Hi, sorry if I'm almost late." You straightened your lips. "Good thing I was about to catch you leaving yet, let's go eat lunch together."

Miyeon and Sullyoon's jaw dropped at the student council president's proposal. Sana's eyebrows knitted hardly. "Huh? What nonsense are you saying?"

"Why? I'm just going to invite you to eat with me?"

"With you?" Sana scoffed and chuckled. "You have the guts, I'll give you that... but NO." Sana leaned forward at you to say this.

"Let's go girls."

Sana was just commanding her classmates and taking a step again away from you but in her surprise, she felt her body being pulled by a force. She tried to process what happened, and there she found her skin contacting with yours as she stood by your side...

with your hands wrapped around her waist.

Miyeon and Sullyoon's eyes largened in utter shock at what they're seeing. They couldn't believe that such a new transferee would get to gain closeness and change the behavior of the famously respected and knowned leader of the students around the campus.

Sana's lungs skipped functioning as soon as she felt your fingers dug deeper into her skin. Her face then starts to turn red and her face showing almost hilariously stunned reaction, with no hint of an idea what has turned you to be like this today.

"Pardon me for Sana's antics right now, we just had a fight yesterday and I wanted to come up a solution to fix that." You said in a melodic and apologetic tone to them. Sana was dumbfounded at the ridiculous fake words you are talking about.

"W-wha"

Sana wasn't able to finish her words, when she felt herself getting pulled again, now squeezed against your body which intensified her heartbeat and blushes.

"So, please. Can we eat together today, love?"

Any words that are synonym to what I mentioned earlier can be heavily applied now to all three women witnessing the sudden change of the president's act.

You led the way, bringing Sana with you as both crossed the hallway with the confused and flabbergasted duo following on the back while some of the students can see the two having this kind of contact has began to grab attention.

As they reached the cafeteria, Miyeon and Sullyoon shyly approached the "couple". "Uhm, Sana. I think we can just eat sometime. We'll let you have you two your private time okay?"

"B-but w-"

"Thank you for being considerate on us, girls." You smiled humbly at them and they nodded before they left you and Sana to find their own seat. As the two of you remained, Sana's face crumpled and seethed much air to unleash her full force on escaping to your touch.

She quickly unhooks your arm on her waist, pushed you aside, and punched you in the shoulder. "Oww!"

"Seriously, what the hell did you do to me, YN?!" Sana started to bicker out on you. "How come you just started to spit out and let my friends hear and see you assuming that we have a relationship now, huh?! Did you ate something bad that had you acting like crazy today?"

"Nope. I'm perfectly fine, and what I did there earlier, consider getting used to that." You replied. "Because from now on, I'll be going to do it with you again and again and again a-"

"Woah wait no what?!" Sana paused you. "And why is that, huh? I haven't even agreed yet on the deal-"

"But was the contract got cancelled?"

Sana fell speechless. She remembered yesterday that she swore to dump the contract by requesting to her parents after she gave her disapproval. However, she failed to do so.

You took her silence as yes. "I suppose it didn't. If it does, my parents would've informed me immediately."

"Yeah yeah yeah, you won. So what? You still can't just do it like that to me randomly. I still haven't gave you the consent to touch me or do anything lovey dovey around me. Just because the contract states that we are arranged to be a couple that doesn't mean I can let you easily do everything free around me. Especially when the fact that I still hate you so much." Sana pointed at you as she stares deeply within you.

"Alright, fine. You do have a point. I shouldn't have done it. It's my fault, I made you uncomfortable, and I'm sorry for that." You spoke in a calm tone. Sana got her insides tugged at your sudden softer behavior. "But just know this, I hope you can let me do these with everything I can. No matter how much you deny, we are still stuck in an arranged contract that has a month allowed on us to come up on a decision if we'll take a marriage, and that gives each of us the right to do what couples does.

And I'm going to use it also, for me to prove myself to you that I've changed through all these years, Sana. Consider it me acting or say whatever you want, but when it comes to you, I'll show my improved self and nothing less than that." You said plainly to her. Sana is just listening at you patiently, sticking out important details to her mind while her emotions were a bit being brought by your committed words.

"I can't force you to love me back and have our marriage settled someday after the deadline comes, I wasn't even into love these days but I had no choice but to follow. But, I really do hope that before or when these all ends, I can hear you saying that I am now forgiven."

Sana was struggling to come up for a words to answer, and you took the opportunity to let her have time to remember and process everything as you locate a seat and bought foods for both of you. You left the still pissed off Sana became completely silent and come back to join her in an awkward lunch together.

That went on and on, with you trying to get along with Sana through most of the occasions. You supposed to take it all as a yes coming from Sana that you were being a chance to prove everything to her that you are not this same bad person she used to resist before.

With your frequent actions around Sana led to the campus knowing also about your rumored relationship with her.. Some were supportive that the president finally get to have a girlfriend such perfect as Sana while some were not due to the reason of jealousy most concerning about the fact that they are not the ones standing on the shoes or position of either you or Sana.

That didn't affected both of you, especially Sana who is trying her best to become unbothered with all of these because she is too tired to explain it to many people for some truth that everyone wouldn't accept easily. She knows it all to herself anyway that it's all part of the act, that none of them are interested with each other or has a growing fond being developed.

Not until one day, she accidentally finds you tutoring a female student in the library. She saw how entertained you are on how easily the girl gets to understand quickly with your teaching, thus turning you both looking happy together.

Feeling a bit uncomfortable at the scene, her lips unconsciously forming into a frown. Sana instead leaves the room and went on to return with her friends who noticed her bad mood as she buried her head around her crossed arms on the desk.

It all procceeded until their next subject when the girls tried to approach her about it. "Hey, Sana what's with the grumpy look?" Miyeon said as she peeked at Sana who looks completely out.

"You weren't participating with us lightly, what happened when you left the room earlier?" Sullyoon added.

"Yeah, you seemed in a no good mood."

"Nothing." Sana blabbered.

"Was it YN?"

"I said NOTH-" Sana paused and realized that she just made herself obvious, Miyeon and Sullyoon were just staring at her.

"Welp, that confirms it." Sana sighed. "Care to tell us what's the problem?"

She remained silent. She wasn't sure why she's getting a bit embarassed to reveal it until she also got nervous when her friends began to list down some of the possible things a couple creates problems.

"Was he cold to you today?"

"Hmm maybe you're the one who's not?"

"Or... could it be somebody's jealous-"

"What, no?!" Sana rapidly reacted. Miyeon and Sullyoon exchanged a "gotcha" look.

"Oh unnie, you're too obvious." Miyeon laughed.

"Jealous of what? Or should we say, who?" Sullyoon curiously asked.

"S-stop! I said it's nothing, okay! There's no chance in hell that I am jealous because of him." Sana made a "tch" sound on her mouth. "I don't even like him at all." She rolled her eyes as she whispered it, barely to be heard by her friends who returned focusing on their own. As she was left alone with her trouble, her eyes went staring at the window, she sighed deeply as she felt a strange regret inside her after saying those words while remembering what she saw back in the library.

As if she meant it.

Hours later, Sana bids goodbye to Miyeon and Sullyoon before she walked at the hallway all by herself. She stopped on her steps when she felt this unsettling feeling near her shoulder.

Her head goes turning around, searching for something but was unsuccessfully. Sana sighed and shook her head. "YN isn't coming. That guy/girl is a student council president, Sana. He/she's probably busy." she muttered to herself.

Sana continued to move, with a blank face and a moderate speed. As the afternoon light about to engulf her, she felt her sling bag slowly float, the weight she's carrying quickly became lighter.

Her breath got taken away shortly in surprise until she realized what caught her from that action.

It was you, smiling while standing beside her as you taking off her bag gently from her shoulder.

"May I?"

Sana didn't respond, she just let her arm spread a bit to let the strap fall, easily allowing it to fall from your posession.

"You do look like having a bad day." you peeked at her expression. Sana slightly got shy, and turns her face away as she pouted while rolling her eyes arrogantly.

"You just noticed? I'm always like this whenever you're around me."

"You sure there's nothing more than that? I know it's pretty much of a 'me' problem but... can you be more specific?"

"Oh come on, wasn't that enough for you? Stop triggering me, please. I said what I said, you are an eyesore that's why." Sana crosses her arm. She started to walk down the stairs as you slowly followed her with a faint smile on your lips.

"Okay, if that's what you say. I'll just be here behind you. Too bad, I wanted to lead the way because I want take us somewhere unwinding first." You sighed and tightened your lips. Sana heard it, sensing a weird sensation through her. She must be saying no or even meaner than that, but how come she became more curious?

Sana heaved out a large breath of air before pausing on her walk with a stomp. She turned around to face you as she gestures you to come forward. "It's only because I needed it."

And you grinned thankfully.

The two of you went to a cliff from a road outside of Seoul. Just in time, Sana was about to whine about how dangerous this place you chose until she was distracted of the magnificent sunset in display to the skyview.

Each of you took a picture, with her being first. You clicked the button, instead the shot accidentally captures Sana turning her attention back at you. As she approaches you, you dragged down your phone in embarassment and nervousness that she might found out and suspect that you're secretly spying on her.

"What happened to you?" Sana finds your tensed manner.

"N-nothing. I just... remembered something."

"Weirdo." She teases you. "So what's gotten into you choosing this place. Are you gonna push me there down the cliff to show me your true colors?"

You looked at her exhaustedly, no much in an energy to enlighten or defend yourself. "Say or think of anything suspicious about me, Sana but I wasn't even harming you even in my imaginations anymore." You didn't bother to look at her because all you'll see rather is an irritated, sassy woman whom you had a price to pay for.

"This is my favorite place to chill." You simply answered, leaning at the front of the car and posing your limbs as you supported yourself with your arms pressed on the car. Sana looked at your side-figure.

"I started finding this when me and my mom used to go here when I was young. She was the first one to notice how beautiful the sunset is to watch from here, and I did agree on her... and it turns out to become one of my favorite scenery." Sana just listened to your story as you continue to witness the sun hides from the clouds.

"My mother told me to stay with her longer here because for a moment, she found peace and serenity. She felt like there's nothing to worry about." You paused as you smiled proudly. "She felt like she wasn't going to be alone in this battle she's facing, because I was there by her side. Even though I... wasn't that too much vocal or expressive at what I've gone through in our family, but... my heart knows where I need to stay. Where I can surely find a better outcome for my life someday."

"That's why when the right thing happened one day, I started to listen and follow to my heart first. I kicked out all those delinquent students away from my company and I only remained my wonderful mom and dad... step-dad..." You corrected yourself, Sana shrank her eyes at that intentional pause. "Because it felt like it's the right thing to do, and it did. It helped me to get back up to my feet and reshape myself to become a proper man that my mom always wanted to see in me.

Sana, mind I if ask... am I progressing?"

Sana stares at you as you glanced at her with your glistening eyes full of hope. "I'm not gonna lie this time, but you sure are doing quite an effect on me..." Her voice is slowly decreasing through the words.

"But that won't still change anything about what you did to me before. People can say past is past easily but me? If it wasn't for that, which I don't know... should I say thank you atleast anyway... for motivating me to change my appearance? Lose a massive amount of weight, beautify myself more, get rid of those eyeglasses and braces just so that I can be accepted and liked by many for my features like what you said?" Sana said with a bit of a hatred rising through her again. You remain speechless as you understand why it's driving her mad.

"I achieved a better life too but unlike you, what I did I get? You put me into a trauma that I'm still bringing to myself till this day. Fear and anxious that...  makes me still remember it all."

"I like the passion, YN... but I will never going to forgive you for what you did to me. I will always hate you for that." Sana said it with all honesty. "And that's enough of a reason for me to have no interests on having our deal contract settled."

Heartbroken, you chose to ignore and hide as you have nothing more to do than to accepts her decision. After all, you were the one who already said that you can't force her to make amends with you.

"Understood."

The next week, Sana was about to go downstairs when she found a student sipping lollipop at the corner. The guy looks completely wasted, obviously breaking the proper uniform rules. She decided to ignore him as she continue to go through but insteas, the guy catcalled her before moving on its own, approaching Sana.

"Hi there, hot stuff." The guy said before taking off her lollipop with a slurp. "Where you going at?"

"A-at my class." Sana nervously said.

"Hmmm... okay. Nice and proper, I like it. Ladies like you are easy to be tamed, isn't it?" He smirked menacingly.

Sana stepped back and grabbed her sling bag. "E-excuse me? How dare you-"

"Ohhh, daring. Such a duality we got here huh, I wouldn't mind if you can do switch roles with me, however we can only apply that in the bed."

"Shut up, pervert!"

"Cmon, lady. It's that simply, feel free to take a shot on me, and you can be there to your classroom without a problem."

"And if I don't?!"

"Challenging and fightful, I like that."

"Then you're going to love me."

Sana and the delinquent both became surprised as you made your unexpected emergence from the stairs, hurrying down ss you pushed away the guy and had him bumping his back on the barred metal gate.

"This one's pestering you?" Sana only nodded.

"Ugh shit! Ah, look. It's the bastard of this goddamn student council!" The delinquent said while touching his upper back in pain.

"Choose your words more carefully. I can report you and have you be placed in a sanction that you'll regret."

"Go on, make me. As if I give a shit. This entire university is a complete bullshit anyway. The only reason it got me staying here everyday, is if wasn't for some sexy chicks like here roaming around-" The deliquent didn't had to speak disrespectfully and point at Sana longer as he ate a crunchy right punch from you straight to his face.

"You crazy bitch!"

The guy fights back at you, returning the punch you gave. It agitated you and led yourselves into a brawl that had the groans and growls echoing to the upper floor, catching student's attention. Sana panicked and tasked them to call a guard to seperate the two.

The guy got the advantage during the fight, he continues to give you a barrage of kicks to the waist before he pulled Sana closer to her and inappropriately traced her sides while he chuckles dangerously.

Sana felt disgusted and quickly slaps the guy. "What do you think you're doing, huh? Fucking slut!" He gave Sana a fast backhand slap that had her twirling and crashing next to the metal handles of the stairs.)+•~

You saw what he did, with anger fuming in you, you pulled his leg and sent him down on the ground before you tackled him andgave him multiple punches until the guards and the officials broke up the fight.

"THE TWO OF YOU, PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE. NOW!"

As a result of the fight and from the decision made by the higher ups, the guy was kicked out of the campus for multiple delinquent offenses while you got suspended for your role as the president for a couple of months when they learned that you just did that for self-defense.

Sana was sitting on the bed with the nurse preparing the first aid until you showed up and requested the nurse instead to leave it all on your hands. She hesitated for a minute that you are also bruised but you bargained until she gave up and listened to you as a respect for being a student leader.

Sana in her surprise, watched you sit down and grab the first aid beside you. "W-what are you doing?"

"Treating you."

"Don't make me a baby, YN. The nurse can do it herself."

You just stared at her and Sana felt a bit intimidated. She decided to shut up and forcefully let you do your thing. "Good. Now come closer and lemme see your cheek."

She leaned forward and directed her aching cheek on you. "That idiot." You cursed as you search around the reddening spot. You weren't aware that it was mixed by Sana's blush now to have you staring very closer at her.

You started applying the ice pack around the hurting spot as Sana hissed before she swallowed in her throat and spoke. "T-thank you... for earlier."

"No problem. That's unusual, atleast I got a positive comment from you.

"I- I wasn't expecting you to come to rescue me, okay. And I didn't know how much I needed it."

The awkwardness between each other formed as none dared to speak afterwards when both got lost in their words. However, you started a topic that might break the silence and for Sana to understand more.

"I wasn't always like this."

"I know, you said it. It's just that there's something happened that I don't know-"

"It's my dad." You answered it. Sana looked at you. "I know you've been itching to ask me what exactly happened."

"I just don't want to because I felt like it's not my intention to know more and all I had to do is to understand you because it seemed too personal that I might sound forceful. But I do really wanted to know why." Sana replied. "So... step-dad?"

"No. My biological dad." You revealed. "My original father was abusive to my mom. I learned that he became like that when he started to fell addiction to gambling and other crazy stuffs that risks your money badly. He releases his frustration to my mom until she couldn't take it no more when she heard it loud and clear from my father that he despises her for me not turning out to be the one he's expecting. He always wanted a son/daughter but... nope. That's just all a part of his excuses that made my mom snapped and file a divorce  and report to my dad, and guess what. Her attorney became so interested in my mom and here he is, my mom and my dad broke up and him, who is now my step-dad, saved mom and I." You said as you applied care on her bruises.

Sana looked at you pitifully and for the first time, she frowned for you. "W-why are still helping me or... treating me good, even though I don't return it back at you?"

"Because... I got influenced. At first, I look up to my dad. I thought at first that he was tough, strong... I started becoming like him when him and my mom always gets to have a proble but then I realized that he was a true coward for proving all that by beating up my mom. And she was the one who is actually tough, because despite of all the suffering she took from my dad, she didn't hurt him back physically but that doesn't she has no plans to fight. Because if she does, then I wouldn't be in a better state if it wasn't for her.

So I changed. I took mom as my role model. I remained calm as much as I can. I did it all to reshape myself from the ghost of the past. Now here I am, rather choosing to prove myself and mean it all on my words on you. I don't want to fight anymore to cause trauma, Instead, I'll do in a need to protect the people who are close to me."

Sana tied all the strings together, and it did finally all comes to a clear point that it wasn't really your fault that you turned out to be that reckless bully that she had to go through a hard time before. She would be lying if she won't admit that she is a supporter of a belief that people can change, and it comes through this moment that she decided that she can use that phrase for good.

"There, all done." You said as you tucked all the hair to her ear and patted the bandage firmly on her face. Sana was just staring back at your tender and admirable demeanor. "Does it still h-"

"I forgive you."

"..."

You fell silent. That was very out of nowhere, but suddenly it got so uplifted to hear that successfully.

"Y-you do?"

"And we still have a week remaining ahead of us. We can use it to finally be able get along together."

You smiled widely as you saw how Sana's bright and cute grin shines right in your eyes. She looked so beautiful, and you even felt more guilty and poor for her on vanishing this irresistable kine of joy within her before.

"Yeah we can. T-thank you a lot, Sana."

Sana patted your hand to calm your happiness down. She smiled as she stared down at your hands stacked together. She took a grip on it and even felt the heat crawling through her skin, sending to her overflowing emotions in her heart.

It actually does look... fitting in her opinion. And she even agreed more to herself when she looked back up to see the owner of the hand she would actually love to hold more in many occasions.

That moment, Sana confirmed to herself that she has now began to discover a liking on you, who is also discreetly sharing the same serenade as her too.

Days after you and Sana tried to start this brand new closeness both of you has started for each other, its aftermath had left you ran out to became so overwhelmed about it, now that have reminded you of something that requires to be done more important before the expiration was reached.

You wanted to be happy because you have now made peace with Sana, but today wasn't the right time for you to celebrate fully.

Too much occupied on spending time for each other, that it almost made both forgot that you had to deal with a serious matter when the next day comes.

Your mood disrupted as you got conscious of the date today, not even Sana's bubbly personality can distract you from it or anything. You couldn't even join her as you remained watching her instead for some reason.

"You seem like you're in deep thoughts again, YN." Sana poked you with the tip of the ice cream she bought. "Are you okay?"

You didn't answer right away as it took time for you to snap back into your senses and found yourself being confronted by Sana.

"Y-yeah."

A lie. Sana detected that disturbing twitch of a forced smile on your lips.

"Really, what's going on? I know i've seen this last time on you getting blacked out of nowhere but this one feels different."

"How can you say?" You asked in a dead tone.

She shrugged and opened her ice cream first before she continued speaking. "That something's definitely bothering you. You're so stiff and uneasy. Does it makes you scared?"

"M-maybe it is..."

"Care to share what it is then?"

You were about to respond but Sana introduces you to her cold palm blocking your sight.

"But first, eat your ice cream. It's gonna melt, plus... it's my favorite flavor, okay? I don't want it getting wasted." She pouted adorably.

You chuckled and sighed as you opened your ice cream. "Delicious."

"Who? Me or the ice cream?"

"W-what?" You looked so baffled at her suspicious remark.

She laughed loudly at your embarassed expression. "I'm sorry- it's just... you keep on staring at me while you're licking it and commenting it for me. I thought you're teasing me so... I tried to get back on you."

"S-stupid, you and your pervy thoughts..." You rolled your eyes and blushed intensely at her own silliness. "And what if I say you?" you smirked a little and glared at her.

"Then I don't mind having you grab a taste as much as you like~" Her eyes didn't even had to glare back at you to look flirty and seductive, instead aura changed on its own as Sana ensures that the one who started this kind of fun won't end up getting defeated in the end.

You gulped and looked away from her enticing look as she wheezes. "Sorry, what's gotten over me. Anyways, let's go backto where we left. Oh yeah, what's making you scared?"

You had to compose yourself before replying to her. "Of us. Certainly... for you."

"Why?"

"I can't tell if this luck that I have of making myself had to witness this whole you being... just the way you are is only temporary for me to see, because I fear that... I might lose this... real you, again." You said.

"I appreciate the consideration YN but, risks are inevitable okay? It's fine to take it as long as it won't step or abuse my whole being again." Sana said. "I know you're scared but... face your fears. This is why you seek for another opportunity, right? To make things right."

"But would it be wrong for me if..."

"If...?" Sana waited for your next words to follow up.

Your heartbeat quickened, nerves trembling, emotions rising, as there's no going back once you have revealed this secret you have been keeping from her in weeks. "Would it be wrong for me if I don't just want you as a friend anymore? That I also began to admire you more than that?"

Sana's smile dropped. Her gaze went more focused on you as she couldn't believe what she's hearing. "Y-you like me?"

"I know it's ridiculous of me to say that to you, because I feel like I don't have the right to feel this way because I made you like this... forcefully with my wrongdoings. But, I don't know why my heart is being like this." You said to her.

"Maybe it's due to what I've said to you last time that I started to follow what my heart wants, and it pains because... I feel like this is what I may be missing after all these years when I rather ending up hurting you against my will. And now it makes me worry if I continue this feeling i'm having now that we have buried your hatred, I might lose this... bright side that depicts the real you, Sana. That I mercilessly thrown away when we first met.

I don't want to let it go but... I couldn't  get rid of this feeling in me, even after you told me you have declined our contract, I'm heartbroken but I still keep on loving you." You started tearing up. For the first time, Sana has fully visualized this fragile self of yours and it truly does hurt her deep inside.

"But I don't want you to pity me. I still respect your decision, but... for the last time... a last hope in me, I just want to ask... do you... still want to reconsider it?"

You looked at her with your poor eyes. Sana got her breath taken away by your weakened state. Her heart crumples in pain seeing you like this because you are heavily concerned of something that you don't even had to.

Because she likes you too, and you don't even know yet.

If your heart chooses her, her heart needed you more.

"I'm sorry..." is what came out as a whisper to Sana's shaking tone. Your heart shattered and there's your last hope disappeared like a popped bubble in the air. She was about to speak but you interrupted her.

"I see. I get it, no matter how much a person forgives you for your sin, there's always be time that would grant you the punishment for wasting that moment that you should've been good rather. A karma, in short. And this one, is what I have to bring and suffer for the rest of my life."  You said to her with a bitter smile. Sana was in awe at your guilty pronounce.

"I enjoyed our time but I think I have to go now, Sana. I'm sorry." You excused yourself to Sana as you emptied your ice cream and left her speechless on your spot with her. Her frozen consciousness has what costs her to respond late to unable to catch you as you walked away from her sight.

Sana was left in distraught, as the words she was about to say and the entirety of your confession sinked down to her.

March 31. The day of the proclaimation has come. The month is ending and that means the contract has reached its breaking point. You and Sana met again in the court along with your parents in each of your sides.

Both parties are worried and confused on why you and Sana seemed so dull and devastated that neither couldn't look at each other's eyes anymore. This is what you feared, and the regret is eating you up again so bad.

"Mr/Ms. LN, are you in favor of the contract to be published and hereby signed by you?"

"I do, your honor." You said. You wanted to give it up but you chose to fight for what you have desired more. You wanted to be with Sana longer, and even if it won't grant you the same opportunity, it doesn't matter. Atleast you have become honest to your heart that you would've love to have her as yours.

Sana's lips trembled as she tried to fight the tears about to pour down on her face but was unsuccessful that the judge had to halt the question. It breaks your heart more to see her in an emotional breakdown in front of you.

"Miss Minatozaki, are you okay?"

"I... I'm not..." She sniffed her nose and wiped her tears before proceeding. " I'm not in favor of the contract, your honor."

Your family and Sana's both were in shock and saddened. You weren't surprised, but you are surely devastated that she is really this a hundred percent certain of her decision.

"Are you sure with your answer, Miss Minatozaki? You look hesitant. Perhaps you can provide a clear explaination why you still responded the opposite?"

"I'm really not in favor of the contract, your honor." Sana shook her head. She wiped her tears again before she stepped forward and came closer to you.

"Because I don't want to have it done arranged."

Your eyes widened. The collective gasps of the both sides can be heard from the court.

"I'm rather hesitant because I want to be with you more, YN... but not through this. I want us to build the story of our relationship through our own. I want it that way, not this where others had to dictate and rush us how things should go for us." She apologetically looks back at yours and her family, and gladly they nodded understandably at her point.

She immediately pulls you into a hug so tight that you wouldn't even care also if you got suffocated into her endearing gesture of what finding your home should feel like. "I'm glad that you didn't let go, YN... because I love you too."

She sobbed into your shoulder and you gave up with your emotions as flood of tears fell down on your face, but this time it was all full of joy and relief. You reciprocated her action as you wrapped her body into your own embrace and cuddled her head on your side.

"Thank you... thank you for giving me a chance, Sana. I'll do everything I can not to ruin this. I love you.

She leans away fron your shoulder and holds your shoulders as she traces your face super close between each other. "I'm so proud of you, YN. You deserve it."

"And yes, I would be glad to be your girlfriend... and your future wife soon." She winked before she pulls your head next for a wholesome romantic kiss.

Your families and even the judge clapped and congratulated in support for your newfound stronger relationship with Sana since this is a sight to behold seeing two couples aren't destined to be torn apart from each other... but rather to stay together forever despite all the harsh and crucial situations they had gone through.

Love, in cooperation with time; always finds a way to connect two people's hearts no matter how long it might take, and this... is the way their story had to go.

[emotionally-damaged-carrot]

"Just another character in your book"

Part 2 of this

Here is the part 2, haven't had motivation for writing a part 2 lately and I've been super busy. Hope this was worth the wait? I tried to proof read it but I am too tired it's 2am here. I will get to the request rotting in my inbox when I can. I have just been super busy lately and most likely until december. Hope you understand but I try to do the requests asap.

Warning: none, surprisingly

Hope you enjoy ✌️

Walking back into the apartment it filled me with sadness and betrayal. A place I once felt safe and loved, now it felt more cold and fake.

"I-i'll make dinner after I freshen up."

I told Charles as I pulled away from him and rushed to the bathroom in our bed. 'Smells like cheap perfume mixed with sweat.' I said to myself as I noticed 2 used condoms in the trash as I entered the bathroom. 'Guess she wasn't all that if he they only did 2, or did I interrupt?' I asked myself, trying to ignore the thoughts from plaguing my mind.

As I undressed and entered the shower the tears began to flow again, the sobs coming out louder. I opened the shower to try and hide the sounds, hoping he won't hear. But then again, if he didn't hear me enter earlier, he probably can't hear me right n-

"Y/n, you okay?"

My thoughts were cut off by his voice.

"Y-yea, why'd you ask?" I asked trying to sound normal but my voice faltered.

"Are you sure?"

"Of course, why wouldn't I be?" I asked cheerily, hoping it's enough to get rid of him.

"If you say so, I'll skip dinner, I already ate earlier. Sorry." He said apologetically.

"No worries, you don't have to apologize for eating." I said with a chuckle. 'You only need to apologize for doing her on the bed we sleep in.'

"Okay, I'm gonna go shower and chill on the couch."

"Okay."

After our little interaction, I finished showering and dressing myself up. Walking out of the bathroom I see that he changed the bed sheets and the pillow cases. 'So I won't smell the intense session you two had.' I thought to myself with a smile.

I got out of the bedroom to go make dinner for myself. I see him on the couch with the t.v on but he's focused on his phone, laughing and blushing. I caught a glimpse of what was on screen, seeing a name with a heart beside it, and some not so safe for work texts and a video. 'They even recorded it? Wonder how long before it gets leaked, I wonder how everyone will react when they find out everything?'

As I got the ingredients ready, and cooked, I accidentally burned myself on the pan. Not fully concentrated as my mind wondered about the events that occured just some time ago.

"Fucking bitch." I whisper shouted as pain shot up from my fingers. I immidiately ran my hand under cold water.

"Amour? What happened?" Charles asked as he entered the kitchen and walked towards me.

"I-i-i'm fine, j-just made an oopsie, I'm gonna go back to cooking again with more care this time hopefully." I said with a dry chuckle as I avoided him, trying to distance myself from him. I can't stop imagining the things they did.

"Are you sure?" He asked as he tried getting closer. But I end up just hurrying with the cooking, turning the fire on high to cook faster. Luckily I only need to finish up the egg which takes little time to cook.

"Yep." I said as I put the egg on my plate. Along with some fish, beef, and rice.

"You want some?" I asked as I offered him my plate to stop him from advancing to me.

"Okay, What's wrong y/n?" He said as he stopped in his tracks completely looking confused, hurt and annoyed. 'He doesn't really have a right to be hurt, does he?' I asked myself as I began to overthink everything, maybe I wasn't what he needed? Maybe I didn't do it for him anymore? Maybe, just maybe, I did something for him to seek comfort in someone else?

"D-did I d-do somth-thing?" I asked with trembling voice as I looked at him with teary eyes.

"W-what? Of course not, mi amour. You could never do anything wrong." He said in a loving tone as he closed the gap between us and hugging me tight. I hugged him back just as tight as tears began to flow down my cheeks I burried my face on his chest wetting his shirt.

"What makes you say that?" He asked worriedly as he kisses my hair and ruffles it while rocking me side to side.

"Y-you looked a-annoyed." I said but my voice is muffled by his shirt.

"I wasn't annoyed, I was just confused why you were acting like that. Did something happen at work?" 'Not at work.'

"Did I do something?" 'Of course you did.'

I tried to shake my thoughts away as his questions continued. My mind being overrun by guilt and confusion. My emotions being overwhelmed by sadness and anger. Feeling guilty that I am like this, that I made him worry. Confusion as I can't explain why I am feeling like this, why do I feel bad for him, when he hurt me. Waves of sadness hit me as I felt helpless in his clutch, feeling like without him I would be nothing. My mind and everything are all jumbled up, not knowing which is which or what is what. But one thing I know for certain is that, I shouldn't feel this way.

As I gathered myself I pulled back and away from him, removing his arms from around me.

"I-i'll just go eat." I said, trying to hide the hurt from my voice. I removed my apron, put the dishes in the sink and grabbed my plate from the counter and speed walked upstairs towards the guest bedroom.

As I ate in silence, pondering on what to do. I heard Charles on the phone with someone, he seemed to be having a great conversation if you take into account the loud laughters.

"Of course not, mate... Yea, I'll be very careful. Oui, oui okay, I'll see you tomorro, ciao."

As I finished eating I hear foodsteps getting close, and a door opening and his voice.

"Y/n? Where are you? Amour?"

I heard he say as he closed the door and his voice became a bit muffled, after a bit I heard a door open again and close.

"Y/n? Are you okay?"

He said as he tried to open the locked door to the guest room.

"Y-yea, I just wanted to eat in silence is all. Don't worry."

I said in a cheerful tone.

"I feel like you're not okay, y/n." 'Of course I'm not, after what you've done.'

"Can I come in?" 'No, I don't want to fall for you again.'

"I'll be out in a bit, just gotta tidy up." 'Wipe the tears and clean your face don't let him see.'

"Okay, I'll be downstairs, talk to me.. please."

He said with a brief pause before saying the last word in a sad tone.

"I will."

—

After fixing myself I decide to come downstairs to watch the dishes and clean up. Stepping down the final step I see the t.v is off, and a sleeping Charles on the couch with his phone on his hand and unlocked. 'I shouldn't.'

After I clean up everything in the kitchen, I check back on him to see if he's still asleep. He looked so peaceful, with his eyes closed and mouth open a bit. He looked so relaxed, without a worry in the world. I look back at his phone, curiousity winning. I step walk closer to him to take his phone, surprisingly with no resistance. The first thing I saw was his messages with someone, a woman, I saw the messages sent earlier today. Full of pictures of a woman, in lacy undergament thst barely cover her breasts and other parts.

"Are you sure you want this one?

Those look perfect on you.

They would look better in your hands. ;)

I will make you scream my name"

As I read a few of the messages I started to tear up, looking up at the name of the woman, I saw a heart beside it. Scrolling down I began to see pictures and videos, all sent recently. I saw the pictures he sent to her of him in nothing but underwear with a prominent bulge. The tears began to fall, down my cheeks and onto the phone.

"Amour?"

I looked towards the source of the voice, seeing a sleepy Charles rubbing his eyes. His began to show concern after seeing tears falling down my face.

"W-what happ-"

He didn't finish his sentence as he saw what I was holding. I silently gave him back his phone and made my way upstairs to pack all my belongings, which was not much considering he owned the apartment. I packed my shoes, clothes and nessesities that I bought with my own money, not wanting to take anything from him.

"I can expl-"

"It's okay, I knew you could never love true, that you can't be loyal. I mean, you are Charles Leclerc for crying out loud, ladies and men flock to you, they crave even an drop of your attention. They go crazy from a single glance from you, you could get anyone you want. And it appears you chose a new one, I won't make a scene and get angry, I knew what I signed up for the moment I accepted your proposal to be in a relationship with you. I should've expected this, with a body and face like yours I don't blame you. I want to, but my mind won't let me. I will be out as soon as possible, just get to bed and sleep. I hope she is worth it, I hope it won't happen to her. I loathe her, I envy her, but I don't want her to get hurt. Take care of her, maybe she will give you what you want and you won't have to look for anyone else, I hope she will be the last."

I said as my lips quiver and tears fall down freely from my eyes. I began to close my suitcase and bag, all my belongings now with me. I couldn't bare to look at him as my eyes looked at everywhere but him.

"I-i'm sorry, I love you, it was a m-mistake, please please please don't do this. Don't leave."

He said, his voice breaking. And for the first time ever since I said what I said, I looked at him, tears falling down his cheeks as he walked closer to me.

"I don't want to leave, I want to stay b-"

"Then stay, I will cut her off completely, I will the best boyfriend from now on I will try my hardest to earn your love, I will do everything you want. just please..please.. don't leave me. I need you, I lo-"

"I want to believe you and I want to be with you, but, I can't. Holding on will hurt me more than letting go."

I said as I walked closer to him my hands going o his cheeks, the pads of my thumbs wiping away the tears as his hands hold mine.

"D-don't please, I-i-i-i need you, I love you."

"Please, don't say that, because if you really meant it, you wouldn't have to say it to prove it, instead you'd show it you make me believe it."

"I-i-i can prove it, I can show it, please, just stay with me, don't leave. I-i-i need you, please I'm begging you, give me another chance to show you how much I lo-"

"I want to, I really want to give you another chance, but I don't think I can. I've been hurt far too many times by second chances. I really wanna believe you, I want to love you. I want to be with you, but I'm not going to stay with you if it causes me pain, I can't say I wasn't happy with you, because I was, I really did enjoy being with you. But, it's time for me to let go, the song has stopped and the dance has ended."

I said as I hugged him tight and burry my face on his neck, his arms wrapping around my waist tightly, hoping that if he held me tight enough I won't go.

"Please, I can show you happiness, I ca-"

"I know you can, and you have, but. It's time for you to show it to another."

I said as I pulled back, looking at his face that is now red and tear stained, his eyes red and hair a mess.

"It's time I go, it's very late, you should sleep."

I said as I pulled away and went to collect my suitcase and bag.

"One more night, please?"

He asked me pleadingly, hoping I will cave in if he asked me with the way he looks, like a broken man who lost everything.

"I c-can't."

I said as I put on my bag and grabbed my suitcase, and making my way towards the door. I tried to avoid him, to avoid his hands that were reaching out for me. I walked out of the bedroom and onto the living room, looking around one last time to see if I missed anything. With one last inhale and exhale, I made my way towards the main door and went out, I looked back to close the door to see a broken Charles looking at me with sad pleading eyes.

"I'm sorry Charles, I guess I was only another character in your book."

[a-killer-obsession]

Wanna say real quick if you're a fanfic writer and you're looking at my page like "ohhh they hit 500 followers so fast and they have a upload schedule and post twice a week, maybe i have to post twice a week to get followers" - Stop

This turned into a whole guide for newbies so more under the cut

Please do not use me as an example! Im disabled and unemployed which means i have time to write two chapters a week, please do not put that sort of pressure on yourself!!! I only let myself have a upload schedule because i keep a small backlog of chapters, meaning i have some buffer if my health is bad or i get writers block, and as yall saw recently i will take a break if i loose that backlog. If i was forcing myself to write two chapters a week on a strict deadline i would absolutely loose my shit and probably burn out very quickly. And to be entirely honest, I haven't seen much difference in follower growth now that I have a schedule versus when I was just posting whenever I remembered to. I really don't think a schedule makes a huge difference, I just like having one because it gives me some sense of routine now that I'm unemployed.

What im trying to say, especially if you're new to posting fanfics, is please dont stress yourself out by thinking you need a strict schedule for anyone to like your fic or follow you. You shouldn't be writing for followers anyway, write for yourself! Write because YOU want to write. And if you fall out of love with that writing, dont feel like you need to force it just to make others happy! When i get burnt out writing Wavelengths, I keep going because *I* want to get to the ending, I've been excited to write it for months. Its another reason i dont start writing new long forms until i have a generic plan of where im going, which is something i highly recommend. Having a chapter you're excited to write really helps when you're trying to find motivation.

While I have you here, let me lay down some general tips for new fanfic writers, especially for those who post on tumblr:

Write because you want to write. Don't ever feel like you need to cater to someone else, that's a sure fire way to get burn out

If you do get burn out: don't worry about it, either it'll pass or it won't. Maybe you'll drop that idea all together and move to something new. Don't sweat it, write what makes you happy. Forcing yourself will only make it worse and it'll show in your writing. Writing fanfics is a hobby, it should be FUN. Sure someone might come across your fic years from now and be sad that it's not complete but they'll probably only be sad for a few days at most and then they'll forget about it. Its not a big deal. Who knows, maybe you'll find inspiration years down the line and make someone's day by randomly updating after years of hiatus. It happens 🤷

Dont worry about how much engagement your fic gets. I know absolutely incredible fics that get barely any engagement, and some frankly hard reads that have a ridiculous amount. Its all just dumb luck really. Again - write because you want to

Don't sweat typos too bad. I recommend finishing your chapter/one shot, giving it a day or so, and THEN come back to proof read. I find doing this gives me fresh eyes and I often find a lot of ways to improve the chapter while I'm fixing typos. If you accidentally leave typos in there, don't worry too much. As long as it makes enough sense for people to understand what you meant, people will still read it. Just look at the first few chapters of Wavelengths for example, they're riddled with typos from swapping from 3rd to 1st person, but people still read them (I'LL FIX THEM SOON I PROMISE LMAO)

Don't worry about being cringe. Cringe is dead, make your characters as self inserty and over powered as you want. CRINGE IS DEAD. If you think its fun to write powers and tropes that you're worried will be cringe, fuck it, write it anyway. As long as YOU have fun writing it. Do you know how many "whoops accidental pregnancy" trope fics I've written? Every single one of my long forms has either had it, or planned to, because I like that trope! I don't care if its cringe, I will continue to get my characters knocked up

Some quick accessibility things:

Please left align your fic! I've seen people posting center and right aligned because it "looks cool". These alignments should be used sparingly! As well as things like italics and different fonts/font sizes/colours! They should be used to highlight small sections only! Otherwise they can make it very difficult for people with reading difficulties to read!

If you're posting on tumblr:

Make sure the majority of your fic uses the default black font. Some people set the whole thing to a different font or the "small" font or a different colour and I literally can't read them, and it makes me so sad! I'm sure I'm not the only one with this issue! Its okay to use other fonts for things like headers and descriptions, but for the bulk of your fic use the default! Theres a graphic designer out there somewhere who spent a long time picking the best font for the body text on this website for a reason!

If your fic is longer than a few paragraphs, use the READ MORE function!!! Either cut under a description or the first few paragraphs so people get a preview of your fic. You may think it's silly to hide most of your fic, but if someone, especially on mobile, comes across your fic automatically trimmed on the fyp, and likes your stuff, and they go to your account to see more and have to scroll for a million years just to get past your newest post, they're quickly going to give up trying to read your other stuff. Using the read more function makes it easy for people to browse your blog and check out more of your works!! It also makes it more likely people will reblog for the same reason.

Along the same lines: have a masterlist. This can be as simple as a pinned post where you add a link every time you post something new. This makes it super easy for people to check out more of your work!

If you have a long form/multi chapter I also recommend going to the previous chapter and adding a "next chapter" link when you post the next one. Not 100% needed though, if you have a masterlist that can be enough on its own, people just appreciate having that next chapter link for binge reading. PUT IT AT THE BOTTOM PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING. I hate when I finish a chapter and have to scroll for a million years to get to the top for the link

Feel absolutely free to use the way I format my fics and masterlist as example, but like I said, it can literally be just as simple as a list of links. I recommend listing the links at bare minimum as the title of the fic, and the pairing people can expect (including if its nsfw is a good idea too)

Speaking of NSFW: if your work isn't suitable for minors please make that clear! Even just a 'minors DNI' at the start of the post is good! If you wanna get fancy there are lots of creators who make lovely 18+/minors dni banners you can use for free, just google it and plenty will come up. If you're not adding a cut before the NSFW content then make sure you mark the post as for mature audiences (idk how you do it on the computer because I'm mostly a mobile user but on mobile you can find it bottom right, the icon with the two people). Not appropriately censoring your posts can result in tumblr restricting and possibly banning your account.

Finally, and this one is oddly specific to people who use google docs, but you can use a copy of this google doc to automatically add all the html to your writing so you can just copy and paste it into tumblr or AO3, instead of having to manually fix all the formatting. Do not just copy and paste AO3 html into tumblr, for some reason it has major issues with italics and will cause you a major headache. Just use the linked doc, its a super time saver, I've been using it for ages now

Okay thanks for reading bye

[shiny-jr]

hiiii!! I recently got into quotev to read your most recent release, "how to steal a heart," and was curious if u have any recs for other yandere quotev fics? :o or just any quotev fics in general!! ^_^

feel free to disregard this question tho if u don't have any recs or simply don't want to answer!

Thank you, anon! I'm glad people seem to be liking that story so far. I'm hoping that I can find the time to write for it soon. Hopefully. Anyways, as for recommendations. That's a difficult request for me to answer for two reasons. One: I rarely have the time to read, and when I do read these days its physical books. And two: I'm terribly picky so if I don't like something about a fic its automatically out.

But, I managed to fish out a couple of things from my library that I finished reading ages ago. However, keep in mind, I meant what I said when I say that it has been a long time since I read these fics. So they may not be as good as I remember, or I may get some things wrong. Keep that in mind. Also, these are all yandere x reader stories.

Infectious Intent by Darkened Warrior. I remember when I first discovered this story, I stayed up reading it. I stayed up late, and legit got kinda scared because imagining certain scenes in this story and reading the details gave me the chills and was just not a good idea to read it while it was pitch black and the dead of night. Even the ending got me.

the martyrdom of a final girl by MAI. This is one of the more recent stories I've put in my library, and by recent I mean it's probably been there for almost a year now. I haven't caught up with the updates, but I remember the story really gave kinda protagonist and friend group in the 80's-90's sort of horror vibe to it. Although I don't remember if it got to the yandere yet. It really hooks you in with action that starts fairly quickly which I very much value when starting a new story.

Humorously Inconvenient Tragedies by riz. In all stories, I very much value action. If there's not action in the first few chapters, I usually toss the story out. However, this story managed to be the sole exception to that. I think it's the written tension that managed to keep me hooked. Like the questions of why and how, along with the tension between characters that keep me intrigued.

Bonus: Shameless plug for How To Steal A Heart because damn it if people won't write Latino yanderes then I gotta do it myself. Also because its a vital part in the whole oc lore I have which has been obscure up until very recently.

[silenzahra]

I have a concert tomorrow at this very hour and I'm SO excited and it just got announced on TV and I got so freaking nervous 😂

This means I probably won't be around till Saturday, but I wanted to let you know real quick a few things!

-Even though I'm in the middle of a reader's block right now, please know that I'm saving ALL your stories on my "Marked for later" list on AO3 so that I won't lose track of them when I'm ready to get at them! I truly LOVE your writing and your stories, dear friends, and I really hope I can read them all very soon! 🥰

-Since my new blog is still not properly organized (and this will still take some time), I'd like to let you all know that my old content, both the one I fixed and the one you all saved with your reblogs (💖), can be found under the tag zahra's writing which I've recently started using. That way you can easily find all of my stories and my headcanon posts in case you'd like to! And you're obviously free to use it too if you reblog my stuff 🥰

-Related to this, I know I have yet to properly thank each and every one of you who reblogged my musicians post after I fixed it! I'm sorry I haven't done it yet, but you'll all get proper answers as I deeply appreciate you supporting it even if it's already a few months old 🥰

-And last but not least, I'll continue to check the doc and get at my tags and PMs next week! These last few weeks have been a bit busy/hectic (and emotionally terrible as you know), and I haven't been doing so as much as I should. Hopefully I can finish soon with the doc as I feel so bad to keep you all waiting for almost a month now 😅

With this said, I'm most likely disappearing until Saturday! I truly can't believe I'm literally 24 hours away from relieving this 😭 Wish me luck trying to get some sleep tonight lol, I'm not exaggerating when I say I'm extremely nervous 😂

Love you all so much! 💖

[savemeafruitjuice]

TMNT 2012 Headcannons Because I Can't Function Well Enough to Make a Fic

yeah I'm sorry for not being able to write super well rn,,, but I'll make headcannons to make up for it!

TMNT 2012 HCS! (Slight spoilers! Don't read if you haven't finished season 4!)

TW!: Some Swearing! (my bad)

why does he look like that- /j

Leo

Lee:

I feel like he's decently ticklish but hides it most of the time because of his "I want to look super professional and ninja-y" persona, but there are times when he can't help it.

Worst spot is probably his sides (I've seen this around and it just suits him)

Second worst is likely tied between his feet and underarms

After the battle with Shredder and his vocal cords were trashed, his laugh is much more raspy and doesn't get very loud. Shrieky giggles at most.

Hasn't effected his sensitivity though.

Will squirm like his life depends on it, but generally is sapped of his strength after a few seconds.

Splinter would tickle them as tots, but as they got older it became less and less common.

However, when Leo became more edgy and stoic, his dad came around to make sure he kept smiling.

Gets tickled the most by Splinter and Raph

If asked, won't downright admit to being ticklish, but definitely won't deny it if it's with someone he's comfortable with.

Karai had to do some serious coaxing to get him to let her, but after that she continuously pokes at him to catch him off guard, sometimes even full on tickling him until he can't remember his own name.

All ideas for attack and protection go out the window as soon as he's tickled

Just flops around a bunch

Can't take multiple lers at a time unless it's light tickling- he almost instantly crumbles

Gets really flustered hearing "the t-word"

He'll blush and stutter, looking all taken-aback

Will literally always get his ler back

Unless it's Splinter, he only tried that once as a tot- never again.

Ler

Big brother privileges galore

If Leo's in a good mood, he'll take any and every opportunity he can to wreck his siblings

Tickles all of his brothers equally, but it's really just a matter of who needs it the most, as well as who happens to fall into his sight.

Likes using cheer-up tickles- and needs to. (These poor children are so traumatized)

Tickles vary between scribbling and poking, to squeezing and wiggling his fingers.

Isn't suuuper ruthless, but his brothers still fear him.

Especially if they've made him mad.

If so, it's game over.

Is also very teasy.

Will avoid saying the word because it flusters him as well, but still makes sure to embarrass his little siblings to no end.

I feel like he'd laugh along with his lee, making notes on the silly faces and noises they make.

The most common reason of being forced to take his wrath is refusing to move from in front of the tv while he watches Space Heroes.

Likely a ler-leaning switch

Donnie

Lee:

Donatello looks like he's super ticklish.

And absolutely is.

Worst spots are underarms, thighs, and general stomach-area, but he's definitely ticklish everywhere

Screeches and flails when tickled no matter how light

Laugh is pretty loud, but his giggles are very light and airy.

Will beg the entire time, but doesn't actually mind being tickled all that much.

There was a time when April found out he was ticklish (she walked in on Mikey wrecking his shit) and joined in.

Let's just say his face had never been as red as it was then.

Is tickled the most for not sleeping for literal days straight, or for freaking out, but there are times when his brothers (+ April and sometimes Casey) just tickle him to mess with him.

If multiple people are tickling him, he just completely loses himself.

Don isn't able to formulate words, his face goes beet red, and will go limp after a while.

If April is tickling him, he is so terrified of accidentally hurting her that he just stops moving- complete bodily shut down.

He still laughs and pleads with her, but refuses to move an inch, barely even pulling him arms down to protect himself. He gets teased about it so much too.

That completely flips if it's his brothers though, slapping and punching and kicking so much that it's the main priority to pin him down, rather than actually tickle him.

Actually cries very easily when being tickled

Gave his fam a big scare the first time it happened

Cannot take teasing.

He will hide in his shell until he either feels safe again or is forced out.

Such forcing is done by giving him raspberries on his shell. (The method was discovered by Mikey, and was passed down to everyone they know)

Ler

I don't see him as much of a ler, but let's give it a shot anyways.

Isn't very teasy per se, but there are lots of little things he does that fluster his lee regardless.

Things like creeping his hands close to a tickle spot before actually getting it, pausing every once in a while, things like that.

Doesn't really say much, and kinda just stares at whoever he's tickling. Especially April.

After everyone started noticing this, he switched to giving compliments sometimes so it was less awkward.

Tickles Mikey and April the most, but it's still pretty rare.

Has pretty light tickles

Spidering, soft scratching, and tracing are his go to.

Has only tickled April a couple of times, but it didn't go on for very long because 1) He got too shy, 2) He didn't want to hurt her, and 3) She turns the tables every time.

In all the times he's tickled people, there was only a time or two that they didn't get him back.

Almost completely a lee.

Raph

Lee:

I'm not sure where his worst spot would be, but for sure has a really ticklish torso and neck. Also Underarms.

I love that he's canonically ticklish- it's just so wonderful.

Gets tickled the most by Mikey (much to his embarrassment), but Leo is a close second, followed by Mona.

His laugh is surprisingly high-pitched, making a prime topic for lighthearted bullying.

Attempts to hide his reactions, and does so fairly well, although there are certain things that absolutely make him crumble.

Fights and fights and fights until he's too tired to move.

Absolutely will not hesitate to knock a tooth loose or beat anyone who tries to tickle him, but there are two instances where he will restrain himself.

One of these instances is when it comes to Mona Lisa.

If she is tickling him, he'll wiggle around, but composes himself enough to not accidentally hurt her.

Both of them know there's no way he'd actually do any substantial damage, but better safe than sorry.

The other instance is if he really pisses Leo off.

This has only happened a couple of times, but it is extremely scary.

Raph pretty much accepts his fate.

There's still a struggle, but there is a significant decrease in the amount of effort he puts in to stop his older brother from tickling him.

Still stubborn af though.

Mikey was the one who found out he was ticklish and has been using it against him ever since, almost always resulting in Raph absolutely getting him.

Ler:

Despite the ler energy I've seen him with, I feel like he doesn't tickle people a whole lot.

Doesn't mean he isn't the scariest ler in the Hamato household.

When the tickle monster that is Raph is unleashed, all of his brothers cower.

Has a much rougher approach to tickling, leaving his lee a breathless mess on the floor

He's also extremely teasy, though it's more so sarcastic comments the entire time.

Running from this turtle is not an option. He can and will catch you every single time.

Donnie has learned this the hard way, very many times.

There's a pretty even balance as to who Raph tickles the most, but the most common to see tickly-interactions with is Casey.

Those two have tickle fights all the time.

Leo has rushed into the lair multiple times because of Casey's unholy screeching.

Tickles people the most for getting on his nerves or to get them to be quiet. (Mikey)

Has tried and failed to tickle Mona, and is still unsure to this day if she isn't ticklish, or just hides her reactions well.

Switch-leaning ler

stopp what is this gif 😳

Mikey

Lee:

Very ticklish boy.

Worst spots are neck, knees, and ribs

His laugh is loud enough to make his ler retract and cover their ears for a moment before continuing.

I think he absolutely loves using tickling as a way to mess with his bros or just have fun.

Is mainly tickled for being obnoxious, but April and Casey will get him more casually, exchanging pokes and squeezes every now and then.

That said, his main lers are April and Casey, followed by Raph.

Squirms around a bit, and tries to hide in his shell half of the time.

Isn't as stubborn as his brothers, but he has his moments.

Is more sensitive to physical teasing, such as wiggling fingers, etc.

Needs some kind of affection after being tickled, such as a hug, head-pats, even just some water will do.

If caught off-gaurd, he may accidentally punch his ler in the face. (It has happened on multiple occasions)

Is generally open to being tickled, but will get a little flustered if asked about it directly.

Ler:

Pesters his brothers All. The. Time.

Loves to sneak up behind them when they're not paying attention and poke them or wiggle his fingers into their side.

Is the only one of the four to incorporate tickling into every day life.

Seriously, he'll sneak it into training to gain the upper hand, (it never works for long but A for effort) cheer-up tickles after a tough mission, even declares tickle fights sometimes!

A very quick tickler, rapidly changing spots and moving his fingers at terrifying speeds.

Gets extremely full of himself when he takes someone down, teasing and laughing galore, though this is usually his downfall.

Tickles Raph and Donnie the most often, Raph just to annoy him, and Donnie to initiate a tickle fight, or to make him relax.

Casey is slightly rarer to see, but that's because he mostly hangs around Raph and Donnie.

Loves playing chase before getting his lee.

Also will tag-team with April to get his nerd brother, secretly being a wingman to up his ego in April's eyes.

Makes goofy noises when tickling people to make them laugh more, and it works a lot of the time.

A full switch

Geez, I apologize for not responding very much, my mental health is seriously kicking my butt, but I'm still holding things together so far! Next on my to-do list is lee 2012 Raph, so I'll see what story I can put together for you all. I hope you all are doing well and have a wonderful day/night!

[satancopilotsmytardis]

How do you settle down to write? Like do you put music on, have a certain set up, a snack?

I’m mainly asking because I have multiple fanfic on hiatus (some for 3 years 💀💀💀) because I can’t just sit down and write 😭

I have all this inspiration, and all these ideas (I have 582 open docs 0-0) but struggle to write more than a few sentences a week. I’m not short on ideas by any means, I just can’t WRITE them.

Okay so you gotta figure out what works for you. I read this and my immediate reaction was "well I can't answer that, I just sit down and write, that's not going to be helpful". And I do just sit down and write, I have a lot of things I'm working on, but I pick one or two a day to do and then I just write.

BUT I use 4thewords which is a website that creates an RPG around writing. Every amount you write can progress the story, give you in-game rewards, and help you build a writing streak (at the time of writing I am at 999 days in my streak (I have absolutely missed days but you can recover those with stempos)). I'll be honest, I haven't read a single game pop-up that actually explains the story, I literally don't care about it. But I knew I wrote the most when I was at school participating in Nanowrimo where I could do word sprints and word crawls with other people, and I couldn't hold myself accountable to do them on my own. But the monsters on 4thewords and the quests that can be done help me to stay on track and keep writing.

On days when I don't want to write, I still often end up groaning and saying ugh, if I just defeat ten monsters that each are only 44 words, then I can earn my daily chest, that won't take that long. And I do it. Or if I'm at 3.8k words and I want to stop, ugh there's another reward if I hit 4k, so I might as well just finish the last 200 words. And then, oh wait, there's another reward at 5k, how long will 1k more take me?

I use this site because it has built-in goals and rewards so that I have accountability outside of myself to keep me motivated and producing words. That's the method that I've found works best for me. If you're someone who likes external goals and deadlines, then that might work for you too (or a different similar site-- this one does have a paid subscription, but there is also a free trial to give it a go if you'd like).

If you think that having outside deadlines is too much pressure, then this probably isn't the method for you. Do you edit too much as you write? Try writing in white font on a white page (or whatever color you'd like) so that you can't see what you're writing. Do you get distracted researching something that will amount to one line of text? Put that thing [in brackets] and don't research it until you are going back to edit and adjust from there (same works with naming places or characters). Do you need other people to motivate you? Join a forum (4thewords has lots of these but I don't visit them) or have an IRL buddy who will check in with you and ask you if you wrote that day. Is your writing space uncomfortable? Too comfortable? Optimize it for you! No motivation due to mental illness? Been there, fully understandable, take the time you need to work on that first and other things will start to fall back into place as the brain recuperates.

Not writing when you want to write means that something else is going on, and it has to be you who figures out what that is and makes the changes that are needed to get you writing again. Idk if this was actually helpful, but literally I roll out of bed every day thinking about doing my dailies like a mobile gamer so like... this is all I've got, sorry!

[amethystfairy1]

What I'm getting from the hermit-a-day-may s is that now there are a lot more characters in ttsbc mainly that we just have to wait to see more of

And they are all amazing as well so I can't wait

Btw what's next in the rotation for ttsbc?

(I really should start binging tt at some point cause rn I haven't and I found you through ttsbc but my finals are starting soon so I've decided I'll wait until they are finished, trying to be reasonable here, I should work)

I'm so glad you're enjoying all the new characters in TTSBC thanks to Hermit-a-Day May!

I will say, for a lot of these guys, they probably won't show up again in anything beyond minor roles in the background of our main storylines...y'know, probably. I make no promises, because my main promise to myself with both my AUs is that I'm gonna write what I feel like writing at any given time...that's why I've been able to continue writing both of them so frequently without feeling bored or burned out, I'm still just as thrilled and giddy and excited to work on my AUs as I was when I started them both!

Next for TTSBC? To be completely honest, I'm not sure 😆 I have a few multi-chapter stories in the works, one of which is done, another of which is nearly done, just gotta decide which one I wanna put out next.

I've mentioned in other places, but I'm planning to use the rest of May to work on TT while adding to TTSBC with the Hermit-a-Day fics! I'm just really in the mood to work on TT right this second for some reason, plus like 90% of the Hermit-a-Day fics take place in TTSBC, so it's not like that AU is getting neglected 😆 So once you escape finals then I think now would be a great time to start binging TT! Please read the tags as you do, I'm sure you've seen my rambling about how it's got some dark themes in it. I'm very proud of how it's coming out! I hope you enjoy it! 💖

[99corentine]

Corentiiiine!

First of all I want to say that I love love love Gol Hah Dov! Definitely one of my absolute favourite fanfics of all time. I'm on my 5th or so reread at the moment and love it just as much as when I first ready it. The way you write the relationship between Miraak and Chrysanthe scratches that fated-enemies-to-lovers itch perfectly.

I loved GHD so much that it has inspired me to start writing my own Miraak/LDB fanfic, I have read most of fics available but want more! I have been planning it for ages (an embarrassing amount of time and many, many notebooks in fact) but have just started writing it out officially. The first chapter is very nearly done, and I have plotted up to the final act, but I just wanted to ask how you found the writing process and managed to keep motivated? I haven't evenn published it yet, but I'm already worried that it won't hold up to the other fics out there, especially one as amazing as GHD. I also fear I have bitten off quite a lot with the amount I want to write, and keeping momentum may be difficult.

Thank you again for sharing Gol Hah Dov with us! I look forward to reading Tooth for a Tooth, Tavstarion is another favourite ship of mine and if it's anything like your other fics I'm sure to love it!

Hello, and thank you so much for such wonderful words! I too have been re-reading GHD as I'm proofreading it one last time at the moment, and it's been interesting to see how my writing style and preferences have changed over the course of the story. I'm very proud of how it turned out, and endlessly bowled over by how many people have come forward to tell me they liked it. My dumb self-indulgent story about a 2011 game! It's crazy that it's had so much attention.

You can never over-plan for a story, so having a number of notebooks worth of planning is a great start! I would say you'll want to write the first few chapters before publishing it, just to assure yourself that you're going to keep writing - I have written loads of stuff I was sure would turn into an epic longfic and I never made it past chapter one or two, sometimes it's just like that. When you're confident you'll keep going, publishing it will then motivate you to do more.

I've covered a little of my writing process in this guide I knocked together (which you may have already seen). I'd say specifically for writing motivation, these three things work for me:

Absolutely DO NOT discuss the plot or story arcs in great detail with anyone, as mentioned in my guide this will demotivate you to actually create a finished piece of writing. Holding onto that cool plot thing you want to show to the world and what people's reactions to it might be will fuel you to Write The Thing

Sometimes it's hard to get stuff down on paper, and when that happens eventually I just brute force it: sit down, no distractions, no phone, and force myself to write something, anything, even if it's garbage. I kind of hold myself hostage sometimes, e.g. I'm not allowed to watch this TV show/play this game/do this other project until I've worked on this one

It's helpful to break writing down into smaller chunks. You mentioned you've bit off a lot, can you break it down into story arcs or segments? If you do you'll be writing not to the end (a distant and unattainable-feeling finish line), but just to the end of the next story arc, which is less daunting.

As for quality, I wouldn't worry about that because you'll improve over the course of your story. I loved the events in the early chapters of GHD (scary Miraak is my favourite Miraak) but I think the writing of the later chapters is much, much technically better, because writing so much made me improve. We're also our own worst critics, of course! So your writing is likely better than you think, and it can only grow.

Best of luck to you with it! A longfic is no easy endeavour (and Tooth for a Tooth is probably going to be enormous too...) and it takes a lot of patience and perseverence, but I believe in you!

[totaldramafan-lauri]

Make Use Of Me (chapter 1, preview)

Dec. 7 EDIT: ONCE MORE, WITH BRAVERY THIS TIME. No more chickening out. You can read this thing FOR REAL now. Sorry for being weird, and now....sorry if this wasn't worth it. XD

O-OK...here goes....

First thing's first: I am not expecting a lotta people to read this. I'm not asking people to read this. At this point, I'm making this mostly as a passion project, and if anyone enjoys it, it'll be a really cool bonus. My writing style isn't gonna be for everyone, and the characters I write aren't the most....popular characters in the CRK X Reader community, and I imagine this isn't really something a lotta fans'll be demanding more of.

This is LONG. This one chapter is 56 pages long. I am a VERY wordy writer,

So......why'm I posting this preview? Well....partially as an interest gauge for people who WOULD wanna read it, but...mostly as a motivator. As something to remind myself of whenever I get lazy. After all....I can't quit after I made the first chapter public, right? By doing that, I put myself out there...And, hey, I even tagged it, so, if by the off chance, someone did read it, I'm basically promising them more eventually.....

But, again, I'm not forcing anyone to read this.

Not only is it long, but.....This first chapter is probably my least-favorite thing I've ever written. By posting this chapter by itself, I'm testing to see if it does its job of making people wanna read the rest, cuz....right now, I'm not so sure how well it succeeds at that.....

This is the boring part of the story. It's a bunch of setup, and me jumping through hoop after hoop after hoop to just get everything started. I know setup is important and all, but....I'm already a very wordy writer, so....oof....There is some interesting stuff that happens, but it takes a while to get there.

I-I....kinda hate it, actually. The only reason I didn't scrap it is that I didn't realize I hated it until I was about halfway through it and the "good part" hadn't started yet. And I still spent a month writing the thing, so....I finished it.

I'm tagging this...as an experiment. If you wanna read this, go ahead. W-well, read my tags first, THEN go ahead. XD

All I can really say in this chapter's defense is that....I do try my best to salvage it. It's just setup, but I TRIED to make it interesting. And everything that seems like it didn't go anywhere, will later. This isn't the whole story, it's just the beginning of what's gonna be a BIG story. Anything that seems weird in this chapter, gets explored in the other chapters. This does set up a bunch of stuff that becomes important later (The friend character shows up later, the Colosseum becomes relevant later). This chapter is boring, but I tried not to make any of it pointless.

For the future: I'm aiming for five chapters. Chapters 2 and 3 will be a series of smaller vignettes that take place over the course of a few years, chapter 4 will be the climax, and chapter 5 will be something of an epilogue. After that, there will be two endings to choose from (which will make sense when we get there).

This probably won't be my favorite thing I've ever written, but it will be the most ambitious thing I've ever, and probably will ever, write. I haven't written something like this before, and it's all to flesh out this story and make it believable.

Right now, I.....I want to finish this. I'll probably still be writing this in February at the rate I'm going, but...at this point, I've put too much into it to give up on it. However, I'm STILL not completely ruling out the idea of my motivation dying before then. It COULD happen. So, what I'm planning to do is...setting a short-term goal of finishing chapter 3. After I do that, I'll post the first three chapters on AO3 together, and work on the rest. That way, even if I don't finish it, I'll at least have it over half done, and chapter 3 will end on a somewhat high note.

So, yyyyeah....Not a lotta people will read this preview. Overly wordy writing style + boring setup part of story + 56 pages long + assumed lack of interest for X Readers of this character (At least, I haven't SEEN many simps for her, m-maybe I'm wrong, I might be, I-I haven't checked any tags cuz I've been nervous, b-but it doesn't make my writing any better. In that case, this is my first time writing her so I'm trying super hard to do her justice >//////<)

I-if you wanna read this, and see if this first chapter does a good job of making you wanna read the better chapters, then...Go ahead.....

Some notes:

-This is still not the final draft. It's finalized enough for me to share, but I'm still not considering it finished. Even tho I'm working on chapter 3 right now, I STILL go back and edit this, even very recently. So, chances are, even if the story is finalized, small details and sentences are still subject to change. I know for a fact that there are still SOME placeholder bits in here that will change after I get some stuff cleared up. Recently, I even considered chopping off an entire section to make it shorter. I decided not to, but hey, it could still happen. I don't wanna waste anyone's time. The first chapter of a story, even if it's boring, is still very important, and I wanna make sure it's the best version of itself.

(A-and yes, this means that I've finished chapter 2 as well. The reason I'm not sharing it is that, unlike chapter 1, it was finished VERY recently, so I might still need to give myself time to edit it. From what I have, tho, I do like it a LOT more than chapter 1. There are some parts of chapter 2 that I'm legit proud of.)

-Even tho this first chapter is completely clean, I-I should mention that....this fic is for adults. The full version, at least. Chapters 3 and 4 are gonna contain some light N/S/F/W moments (the "fade to black" variety, so nothing explicit) and there'll be other slightly racey comments here and there. Just a heads-up. I'm gonna be uncomfy with minors reading this.

Th-that's all? I-I think that's all.......O-OK, so......h-here goes..... E-enjoy....

[jokeringcutio]

Open for Halloween Prompts & Updates

Hiya all,

I'm open for Reader insert prompts that are Halloween-themed or set during Halloween. If you want to be inspired, these are my fills from last year. They can be SFW or NSFW. I personally would love to write a few more consensual or more romantic kind of Halloween fics.

I'll accept prompts for fandoms such as: Stranger Things, One Piece, Harry Potter, Blake's 7, Joker (All versions), Peaky Blinders, Supernatural, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Wednesday/Addams Family, Xena Warrior Princess, The Lord of the Rings & Hobbit, Good Omens, Crimson Peak, Dead Boy Detectives, Beetlejuice, Enola Holmes & All Sherlock fandoms, Shakespeare's characters, Many European Movies & of course TRHPS, Five Nights At Freddy's & most Slasher Movies, & Many more so check out my interests or just take plunge and see if I will write your request.

Will I fill all prompts?

Unfortunately, unless I receive just one or two, I probably won't be able to fill them all. I am currently recovering from surgery (Yay, this is a good thing, means we're going to come back babesss) , but still have long-covid weighing me down. So although I'm poking my nose into Tumblr again, I still have limited energy and might have to make choices. But I'll try and fill as many as I can.

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN????

Sorry, I was ill and it became so bad, I couldn't write anymore. Luckily, I've had surgery and got rid of the nasty things so things are looking up. I need a month or two to recover from the surgery. I'll still have my long covid stuff that is weighing me down, but at least I'll be able to write again and slowly return to the living.

WHERE"S THE JOKER FIC????* *Or any other fic I started but haven't finished yet. As said above, I was unable to write and update. The Joker fic: The Man Who Claimed to be Yours is finished, but as a rewritten version that was meant to be an ebook. Because of my health, I've been looking into other ways to make a living and since writing was the only thing I could do (until a few months ago), I decided to explore my options there. I have been working on original tales that I hope to publish in the near future. I WANNA HELP YOU OUT AND COMMISSION Thank you to everyone who kindly donated to my Kofi in the past, or asked me for one of my ebooks or for a commission. I am planning on posting a wishlist in the near future with financial goals I wish to achieve, and setting up a system where I will write a tale for people who donated as a thank you :) I will, however, keep filling prompts when I can, so don't worry about that. I do this for fun and I love sharing with you.

I DON"T KNOW WHAT TO REQUEST BUT I WANT TO READ

Yay, that is wonderful. You can always follow my account. I usually place warnings and add a 'read more' so the post won't show the entire text. If it's not your cup of tea, you should be fine and able to ignore it and wait for something that is more to your taste. And you can always send in a prompt at a later date, when you come up with something. Or just poke me via chat and we can try and think of something together :)

[ghostoffuturespast]

WIP Whenever

Tagged by @streetkid-named-desire! Thanks for thinking of me!

Writing

Quite literally nothing has happened in this department since I finished So It Goes two weeks ago. Taking a bit of a forced writing sabbatical because my work schedule has been insane (and will continue to be insane until August, summer's my busy season) and I've just had a bunch of random social/housekeeping things I've had to take care of on my weekends. Hopefully things'll settle down soon.

I've got a lot of smaller projects on the back burners at the moment that I've been mulling over, but I haven't had the time to do any actual writing. Been jotting down notes when they come to me though. I also need to go back and give SIG a polish too (and take notes lol), there's a lot of formatting and continuity things that need to be fixed.

And I'd like to try out some other writing software/apps. Google Docs is great for working across multiple devices and any general word processor is fine for shorter writing projects, but considering how massive SIG ended up being and the likelihood that Part 2 Electric Boogaloo is probably gonna be a similar length... It'd be nice to have something that's got a wider array of tools, better file organization, and won't crap out on me after hitting a character limit.

(If anyone has any suggestions, I'd be happy to hear them! I've got a couple of candidates so far but candid reviews would be appreciated.)

VP

Still taking VP even though I haven't booted Cyberpunk up in like three weeks. I have a substantial backlog to work through and have the tail-end of the base game missions to post still. I am currently at the beginning of PL again and did take photos of the main missions getting into Dogtown. Got some pretty epic shots if I do say so myself.

Gardening

Trying to see about getting my front yard and my hellstrip converted into a pocket prairie! This is the preliminary design, which makes no sense without the plant list, but hopefully once this gets approved by my HOA I can start working on it. I'm planning on doing my own installation, so this'll definitely be a whole summer project.

Reading

I've been very slowly getting back into reading again! It's been nice. Mostly non-fiction books I can get away with reading at work, but I'm coming around to read folks fics too. It's just finding some free time to sit in my new reading chair rn...

Tagging with no pressure: @fly-amanitaa @merge-conflict @vox-monstera @baublekute @shimmer-like-agirl @mynonsenseistingling @dani-the-goblin

[anoramactir]

book recs! tagged by @rosenfey & @jennystahl. blows kisses to both of you <3 i'll tag @a-treides, @katsigian, @dekarios, @shellibisshe, @devilbrakers, and @frankensteined.

last book you read. the salt grows heavy by cassandra khaw.

horror/fantasy, kind of a little mermaid retelling? i had mixed feelings about it. there was definitely an interesting plot in there, but i thought it was bogged down by purple prose. felt more like a challenge to write the prettiest sentences possible - and there were v lovely lines! - than a story at times.

book you recommend. fight club by chuck palahniuk.

hard q, but i went with this one because i feel like the reputation the movie + it's fans have makes people avoid it. i could repeat all the soundbites about it being a brilliant satire & criticque of toxic masculinity (especially if you read the narrator as closeted) but tbh... i'm reccing it because i think it's fun. that's really it.

book you couldn't put down. bunny by mona awad.

disclaimer: i've seen this one hyped as the weirdest shit you'll ever read in your life but i didn't think it was that weird. lower your expectations. i did like it enough to finish in three days, though. idk what to say about it that won't spoil the plot— kinda heathers meets frankenstein? more eerie than scary.

book you've read twice or more. the queen's thief series by megan whalen turner.

society if this was the old school ya fantasy that blew up on booktok instead of shatter me: ☀️🌊🌳 i read this one back in high school and it rewired my brain permanently. attolia irene is the only girlboss that matters. i come back to it every few years (rereading book 4 now) & i think it still holds up.

book on your tbr. last call at the hotel imperial by deborah cohen.

it's a non-fiction about a group of reporters that covered ww2. i picked it up randomly at a bookstore because the cover was pretty, lol.

book you've put down. the priory of the orange tree by samantha shannon.

i know i'd love it if i finished but it's just so long. 😭 i've tried like three times and i always lose steam about halfway through. at this point i'll finish it by 2050.

book on your wishlist. hollow places by christopher hadley.

ambie actually recced this to me ages ago and i've been dying to read it. it sounds so interesting! but it's not available as an ebook or at my library, and i'm banned from buying physical books until i get through my stupidly tall tbr stack. one day.

favorite book from your childhood. howl's moving castle by diana wynne jones.

nobody is surprised. it's probably my favorite book of all time. a+ vibes, characters, romance, everything. i own three copies and refuse to get rid of any. if i could find an autographed version, i'd own four.

book you would give a friend. interview with the vampire by anne rice.

i need you all to become obsessed with lestat & louis and then watch the amc series so it gets renewed for season 3. please & thank you.

book of poetry or lyrics you own. time is a mother by ocean vuong.

haven't read it yet, but i've heard great things!

nonfiction book you own. girl sleuth: nancy drew and the women who created her by melanie rehak.

goes into the creation of nancy drew & how it evolved through the years, especially how it was shaped by the original ghostwriter and the daughter of the creator, and their decades-long beef with each other. i came out of it with a parasocial grudge against a woman who died in 1982.

what you're currently reading. a conspiracy of kings by megan whalen turner.

book 4 of the queen's thief series. crown prince sophos has been kidnapped and sold into slavery and it's all very dramatic.

what you're planning on reading next. moby dick by herman melville.

i've never gotten around to this one and i feel like i have to eventually. there's a 75% chance i'll get sidetracked and pick up something totally different, though.

[spicysix]

WIP Focus

okkieeee so last year i did this little game a couple of times, where i'd make a poll with my WIPs and the most voted one would be my main focus until i could finish writing it

i've been having a very hard writing block the last months, since my obsession with ST dialed down, but i still have WIPs i'd really really like to finish. and lately i've been reading more, and that inspired me so i've actually came up with MORE fic ideas and it's been driving me crazy cause i can't focus on one to finish writing

so once again i'm here begging for your help

the fics in the poll are in order of which one i wrote most for so far and they're all planned to be one shots. under the cut you can find more info about each fic. you can reblog for a wider range!

birds of a feather

based on billie eilish's new song of same name, a soulmate!AU where you can feel pain when your soulmate gets hurt. robin had her theories, but they're only confirmed when she's stuck on the russion lab under the mall - steve harrington is her soulmate. how does she deal with that little bit of a character study on robin, will probably not be too long and won't stretch out further after the events of s3

illinoise

based on sufjan steven's song "The Predatory Wasp of the Palisades Is Out to Get Us!", i'm not actually sure exactly what i wanna do with this. i have two versions of this fic that i started, but the main thing is that it's through steve's POV as the Party grows and moves out and does things with their lives, but he and eddie grow a friendship through the years but eventually eddie also moves out and that's how steve realizes how he felt - it was more than friendship for him, he was in love. oblivious baby. again, i'm not so sure about this one, it's just that this song has touched me so deeply i need to write something for it

punk!steve

i talked a bunch about it here MANY months ago, but basically, spicy six moves out to a city with a big punk scene, jonathan introduces that scene to steve who finds a way to express his emotions through that music and the concerts and the culture as a whole, but without an extreme change of visuals. fic is told through eddie's POV, seeing steve finding comfort and finding himself in this new subculture, changing himself so subtly but also so obviously, and kinda falling in love in the proccess. i'm still not sure if anything's gonna happen between them in this fic, or if it's a pre-relationship, or if it's gonna be a throuple thing [eddie x steve x jonathan] but the ship is not the focus here

trains

based on song of the same name by porcupine tree, haven't written a single word for it yet but i really want to. i'm thinking cousins chrissy & steve who reunite every summer when chrissy spends it at steve's home, and robin is steve's bff of course so that's how they meet. i'm thinking robin's POV every summer waiting for chrissy to arive, and as they grow older they fall in love

[familyvideostevie]

Ok I was not expecting November to be out until actual November so when I saw your post about au reqs and that the story was finished, I was like ??? Omg what ???

Anyway, loved loved the fic, the concept was original and executed so well, give me x1 farmer’s market steve please. You and your writing talents are incredible! ❤️

And I also have some au requests! and tbh it’s mostly like Steve pov for like everything 🫢 I know it’s going to hurt so much but Steve pov when he comes back and reader’s not there 🥺 And then on the flip side, steve’s first impression of reader at the market 🥺 And also, steve and reader’s first date when they’re back together 🥺

thank you so much for reading!! i'm so glad you liked the fic <3 as for your request, i'm going to go with the middle one -- steve's first impression of bee girl at the market! i have a hard time getting into steve's head but i've tried my best <3

steve's first impression, 1.1k | a no good at waiting one-shot | au masterlist ___

It's not a great Saturday for Steve. The thin fabric on the knee of his jeans finally tore when he tugged them on this morning and he's pretty sure he's getting a sunburn since Robin stole his hat. And, to add to his stress, said best friend is trying her very best to ruin his birthday surprise for her.

Nothing big, not really, just a few candles in her favorite scent from New-Bee's. Which he's meant to pick up today, but Robin won't leave him alone. Despite all of this, Steve manages to take a few deep breaths in the hustle and bustle of market prep. He's a pro at this by now -- making sure all of the produce is organized, prepping the bags for customers, and getting the change drawer sorted. He knows that Claudia Henderson will be by for her plums at 10 and that Ted Wheeler will want apples without any bruises at 1. He'll swing by Rick's to give Eddie his eggs at 11:30 and Joyce will want some berries for Will at close.

This is Steve's life and damn, he's got it down to a system. And he loves it. The Hawkins farmer's market is his home and he knows it like the back of his hand.

Which is why he barely stops himself from swearing out loud when he sees you at the New-Bee's stand instead of Melanie. How could he have forgotten that the new girl was due? Everyone has been waiting for you to show at a market since you got here but this weekend seems to be the one you've decided to make you appearance at. All of his stress rushes back to the surface and he knows he's not going to be his best self for the next few moments. But he needs these candles before Robin notices he's gone.

Even still, he allows himself to stare at you for a few moments before he gets your attention. You're pretty, he realizes with surprise. Really pretty and you look a little lost, a little shy. The stand has been organized much more carefully than Melanie ever bothered to, everything in neat rows with the labels turned out. You care, that much is clear. But why? he wonders. How did you get here?

Not questions for now. He looks over his shoulder but finds no sign of Robin. "Hello? Anybody home?" he says, waving his gloves in front of your face. You startle a little, then smile hesitantly.

"Hi," you say. "Can I...help you?"

He taps his foot once. "Who are you? Where's Melanie?" He doesn't really listen to what you say, eyes taking in your name tag. He says your name aloud in his head, turns it over in his mind before casting it away. And then you say his and he fights the urge to shiver. Get a hold of yourself, Harrington, he thinks.

Maybe he can turn on the charm for you. You probably don't have any friends yet, maybe haven't talked to anyone your age in weeks. So he figures he can pull it off. He decides to lean in, but that only gives him a better look at your face, at the color of your eyes. He has to blink a few times to get himself to focus.

What happens next isn't entirely his fault. That's what he tells himself. It's the unfortunate combination of the day: he's a little stressed, you're new and he doesn't know you, the threat of Robin seeing his activities at any second. But one second he's thinking about flirting with you for real and the next you're telling him you don't have the candles and then you're snapping at him and--. Well. He's backing away and heading for Sara's empty-handed and tasting something sour.

"What was that about?" Robin asks him when he slides behind the berries and starts to fuss with them. "Did Eddie just say you were being mean to the new girl? I haven't even met her yet, Steve! You can't ruin my chance to charm her."

"Yeah, good luck with that," he scoffs. "She's a real treat." Maybe he's being a bit cruel but you were pretty rude to him. He doesn't want you to be rude to Robin, too.

He drags her with him to Rick's to drop off Eddie's eggs during a lull. She interrogates him the whole time.

"I don't get it, Steve," she says and he shushes her. "She just refused to help you? I don't think Bob would hire someone like that."

"Yeah, Harrington," Eddie says, watching the conversation with interest. "You sure you're not just rattled by how pretty she is?" Steve scowls and hopes he's not blushing. Will no one believe him?

"What's it to you, Munson?" Steve bites out. Eddie holds up his hands and gins.

"No need to get jealous, dude," he says. "She's all yours." Robin cackles.

"She's not -- shut up!" Steve runs his hands through his hair. These fuckers will never let him have a moment's peace. "That's not what this is about. Besides, she doesn't seem eager to make friends. I mean, she was pretty rude to me!"

"Yeah, I'm sure you were so nice to her," Robin says. "How did she piss you off so much?"

"She couldn't find the...uh...stuff I ordered weeks ago, Robin. I mean, keeping track of stock isn't hard. I don't know where she came from anyway. Maybe she'll be gone once Bob realizes she's losing stuff like an idiot." Steve has his back to the crowd and he catches Robin's grimace too late.

"Steve," you say loudly, and then your hand is on his shoulder, not so gently turning him around to face you. His brain moves a little too slowly, eyes widening and cheeks flushing as he realizes you overheard him. Shit, he thinks.

Maybe he can salvage this. "Uh--"

"I found your things," you say. Your grin is downright terrifying, and yet he still thinks you're pretty. "So sorry it took so long. I'm just so new and stupid." He grabs the parcel you shove into his hands and doesn't even lean back when you get really close. He can see you pupils dilate. "You don't know a thing about me," you hiss, "so I think you should go fuck yourself."

You turn on your heel and stalk away and Robin and Eddie start to laugh a little too hard.

"Oh my god," Robin says around her heaving breaths. "She's amazing. That was amazing."

"Pick your jaw up off the ground, Harrington," Eddie says. "You'll catch flies." Steve snaps his teeth together and frowns at his friends.

"Stop laughing," he demands. "This isn't funny! I told you she was rude!"

Robin pats him on the back, eyes on the parcel. He shoves it behind him and she sticks her tongue out.

"Yeah, dude," Eddie sighs. "You're so fucked."