#I just feel bad for her kid man cause not only is his mum dying of cancer but she's also getting cancelled on her deathbed and it impacts n

[hjartasalt]

Are people off tikok aware of the lady who is dying of cancer and signed off all her rights to her latest single to her 7 year old son in the hopes that she'll have some amount of money to leave behind for him and initially her song was taking off and getting a lot of streams until someone pointed out that she follows the IDF on instagram so now people are debating over whether or not it's morally correct to stream her song even though the money exclusively goes to her son what stage of capitalism is this

[2-cute-4-school]

𝚗𝚌𝚝 𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚖 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚝𝚘 𝚊 𝚌𝚞𝚍𝚍𝚕𝚢, 𝚎𝚡𝚑𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚜/𝚘

a/n: hiiiii so i decided to make this a 2in1 reaction; basically i just put together 2 of my requests that were *in my opinion* closely related. hope y’all don’t mind and enjoy!! ( ˊᵕˋ )♡.°⑅

requested by annonies: ‘Hey.. could you please do nct dream reaction to s/o having high fever and just wants cuddls? 🥺 like how would they take care of them.. make it fluffy please.’ & ‘nct dream reaction to their s/o being EXTREMELY tired and then like ummmmm cuddling and stuff maybe?? *uwuing in the distance*’

Mark Lee

okay but just imagine this (๑◕︵◕๑)

cuddle sessions when you’re both stretched thin and overworked

even though we all know he isn’t big on skinship i think he would throw all reticence out the window when it’s crystal clear that you both NEED each other ꒰๑˃͈꒳˂͈๑꒱ﾉ*ﾞ̥

so you just crawl under the bankets into his arms and you both just lay together in silence just enjoying each other’s presence

bonus points if he runs his hand through your hair and you trace shapes with the pads of your fingers on his skin (´,,•ω•,,)♡

it would probaby take a couple of lazy kisses and if you’re really really soft he might just hum some song lowly in your ear

just a lil heads up:

you ain’t getting out of his arms ‘til next morning so better hope you peed beforehand and have a bottle of water in reach (ಠ‿↼)

the only thing that would make him get up without a second thought?

if you’re feverish because of your exhaustion

his worry wouldn’t allow him to settle down until he’s 110% sure he made everything in his power to keep you comfortable 

“cold towels, water, painkillers just in case, is there anything i’m forgetting? babe, should i make you some tea-”

“mark, you know what would make me feel SO much better?”

“huh?” ｢(ﾟ<ﾟ)ﾞ??

“CUDDLES, BABE, CUDDLES!!” (╬ Ò ‸ Ó)

you don’t have to say that twice, your man is tucking you into his side in an instant flash ain’t got nothing on mark, he’s a man on a mission

he’ll try to stay awake long enough to make sure you’ve fallen asleep properly since he knows your fever won’t go away without proper rest

might hover over you the next morning too!! ( ≧Д≦)

Huang Renjun

this boy would FRET like CONSTANTLY

especially if you develop a fever 

he keeps piling up a lot of stuff in your room, anything he deems would be potentially helpful at some point is surrounding your bed

“jun, why tf is a cactus on my nightstand?” Σ(-᷅_-᷄๑)

“what if haechan walks through the door?”

“... understandable” ¯\_( ◉ 3 ◉ )_/¯

your room looks like a deposit at this point and you’ve tried to drag him to bed more times than you can count

but he’s restless ༼ ಥ ‿ ಥ ༽

until your frustration topples over and you’re on the verge of tears as you ask him for ✨cuddles ✨

he might actually feel bad for not joining you earlier so he’s gonna be EXTRA soft with you enjoy it while you can

he’s gonna pepper kisses all over you as he encases you in his lil arms and nuzzles his face into the crown of your head (っ˘з(˘⌣˘ )

he’s ready to offer free massages or head scratches!!!! LIMITED OFFER DON’T MISS OUT!!!

also he’s ready for literally anything

fever? medicine and wet towels nearby. thirst? 4 bottles of water AND gatorade. hunger? your favourite take out is waiting. any intruders? cactus is right by his hand. cuddles? CUDDLES!!!!! (۶* ‘ꆚ’)۶”

i think he’ll probably stay up even after you fell asleep, reading about how exhaustion affects one’s body and how to help i just think he’s a really wholesome person despite his all ‘don’t talk to him he angy’ character

but he’s still SO attentive to you!!

he’s down to anything that would make you feel better and if that means 20 hours of non stop cuddling so be it (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧

Lee Jeno

i think he’d be REALLY clingy with you even in normal circumstances kind of like how he’s with mark ya know

so your affected well-being will just give him an extra reason to evolve to his ULTIMATE LEVEL OF PHYSICAL AFFECTION◝( ′ㅂ`)و ̑̑

he won’t let you lift A FINGER

my man is cuddling you even while standing up (灬 ♡ ω ♡ 灬)

he’s also going to insist on carrying you anywhere even if it’s just from the bed to the bathroom this boi is strong you have no excuse to shy away from him he won’t let you

you have no chance at escaping him btw his arms are made of iron when it comes to cuddles good luck prying them off you

and even though he’s clearly focusing on your requested cuddles, he’ll ask you from time to time if you need anything, how you’re feeling, if you’re comfortable

lowkey uses the excuse of checking your temperature to give you endless forehead kithes cuz he can (*＾∀ﾟ)ъ

he also becomes kind of hyperaware of every little move you make

you shiver? he’s cocooning you in yet another blanket. you’re becoming restless? he adjusts your cuddling position until you’re fully comfortable.

NOTHING gets past him ┌༼ σ ‸ σ ༽┐

idk why but i have a hunch that jeno sleeps like a rock

so if he happens to fall asleep too and you need to get up? pfft yeah sure better call for a crane to lift you up from the bed  ૮( ᵒ̌ૢꇴᵒ̌ૢ )ა｡

he’s also going to be EXTREMELY cranky if anyone dares interrupt your extended cuddle session this is strictly ‘only y/n and jeno time’

he might also entertain you with a few pictures of his cats if you’re feeling soft or ugly pictures of his members if you need a good laugh

would totally recommend leaving yourself in jeno’s care!! ♡(.◜ω◝.)♡

Lee Haechan

he would LIVE for your cuddle sessions (●♡∀♡))

despite that, he WOULDN’T STAND you being uncomfortable for a single second if he can do something against that

i think he’s the type of person who wouldn’t leave even the smallest of papercuts untreated when it comes to his partner so exhaustion? fever? yeah no. frickin. way. ┐(;Ծ⌓Ծ;)┌

and after he’s absolutely sure he has everything you might need nearby and put a cold cloth on your forehead and made sure you were hydrated and well fed

he finally climbs into bed with you and just SMOTHERS the shite outta you i’m not even kidding ꒰๑*´ᗜ`*꒱*›◡‹꒱꒱

he’s full on *leech mode*, kisses and nuzzles and gentle caresses

and best part of the package? this man is a walking spotify premium!!

you get to choose whatever song you want and switch with no ads and he has no complaints since his payment is already made in cuddles

you thought this was the end of it?? SIKE

also an entertainment king!!  ୧༼✿ ͡◕ д ◕͡ ༽୨

we all know he probably has shit on all of the members and he’s not shy to do some harmless story telling to put you in a good mood

so just imagine and try coming up with anything better

sleepy you engulfed in the sunshine himself’s arms, tightly cradled against him with his soothing honey voice murmuring and humming to you and only you ��̡̞(◞⁎˃ᆺ˂)◞*✰

his protective side might surface too btw

no one is allowed near you and if someone somehow managed to bother you? oh hell naw  🙃

now they’re on hyuck’s black list good luck mate

his babie gets the royalty treatment in those times guaranteed

Na Jaemin

he’s a doting boyfriend either way i think we can all agree on that

but you clinging to him and asking for cuddles? you not feeling well?

yeah not on his watch mother hen in action part the sea (ﾉ･ｪ･)ﾉ

i don’t think he’d panic tho, his only struggle would be postponing the cuddles you’re asking for while he prepares something to eat and a tea and fluffs up the pillows and blankets he’s gathered (oꆤ︵ꆤo)

but once he’s done?

yeah you’re bundled in a mountain of softness and most importantly? our cuddle bug jaemin (♡ >ω< ♡)

he’ll keep you propped up against his chest while he feeds you himself, proper care is something unskippable in his agenda

but after that any cuddling position is FREE REAL ESTATE!!

anything his baby wants, his baby gets ෆ╹ .̮ ╹ෆ

but for the sake of his mental stability he’d prefer to be in a position from where he can see you

boi is too worried to let you out of his sight so he’s aiming to be the big spoon or facing you directly 三 ( ◜◡‾)っ)⁰▿⁰)

he’ll help you fall asleep in any way he can

he’ll caress your back, your arms, he’ll softly massage your neck and shoulders, he has a playlist ready for sleepy moods

he is PREPARED ٩(๑•̀ㅂ•́)و

he checks your temperature every so often and he grumbles with a pout if it doesn’t seem to be going down

but if it comes down to it he won’t hesitate to ask someone to bring some medicine and if your exhaustion and/or fever doesn’t relent he’ll insist on getting checked by a doctor

it would break his heart to see you so weak and no ammount of cuddles could repair it until he sees you up and healthy again (◕⌓◕;)

but he’ll do all the pampering in the world so don’t worry

Zhong Chenle

i think he would hesitate at first but only because he’s kinda scared he’ll only make it worse and he WOULDN’T want that ( ⚆ _ ⚆ )

eventually i guess he’d step out to call his mum for help before he pulls some bull like ‘let’s do some math it’s gonna be fun’ and you lose your shit like no thanks fam i wanna live (┛ಠДಠ)┛彡┻━┻

he’ll listen RELIGIOUSLY to his mum’s advice 

makes you some chamomile exactly how you like it, probably pulls together something small to eat but won’t force you

what he will force you to take is some medicine you ain’t dying on his watch (๑･`▱´･๑)

and most importantly... DAEGAL CUDDLES!!!! imagine getting to cuddle every nctzen’s bias

he might get *a little* jelly tho if you pay too much attention to her tho

so he makes up some dumb excuse about dog hair aggravating your fever or some dubious other reason why you have to let go of his puppy and cuddle HIM!! ೕ(•̀ᴗ•́)

he’ll do that cute thing where he leans his forehead against yours to check your temperature he has to be extra until the end

and before you go to sleep he’ll  try to prod at you to tell him what caused you to be so exhausted that you developed a fever might nag at you too about how unheathy it is to let it get to that point

he just wants to help okay? baby is worried in his own way ( •́ ∧ •̀ )

if there’s ANYTHING he can do to help consider it done by the time you wake up he’ll ALWAYS go an extra mile for you

and chenle wants to make sure you are aware of that and can lean on him so it never gets to this point again

but for the time being... it’s cuddles and relaxation time!! ✧(๑✪д✪)۶

better believe he’s already preparing a spa day for both of you to enjoy like the  ✨spicy ✨ bitches you are

Park Jisung

his heartbeat accelerates

and unfortunately it’s not because he’s flustered shame (#ﾟﾛﾟ#)

his only thought when he sees you with bag under your eyes and a cold wet cloth on your forehead is ‘shit, they’re dying wait no censor the first part i can’t get my mouth washed with soap but... poop, they’re dying’

ONE step away from calling for an ambulance or morgue in his mind

he SWEARS he’ll let you teach him how to ride a bycicle as long as you get out of this safe and sound (╬⁽⁽ ⁰ ⁾⁾ Д ⁽⁽ ⁰ ⁾⁾)

he’s a bit of a mess, but he’s your cute mess

it would take *quite* a bit of reassurance that you’re going to be fine after a good night’s sleep and some jisung time for him to somewhat relax

his cheeks will flush once he curls himself around your form no matter how many times you’ve cuddled before

but once you sigh blissfully once he wraps his arms around you, it’s game over for him ε=(｡♡ˇд ˇ♡｡）

he MELTS against you

he’ll caress your head and gently scratch your scalp, lays kisses on your cheeks/forehead/crown of your head

but he will also fret every time you toss and turn or you make any sound that seems ‘distressed’ to him

we all know he can sleep anywhere under a frickin carpet so he won’t have any problems adjusting to whatever works for you since all that matters to him atm is that you’re comfortable (♡ >ω< ♡)

he just wants you to get better faster

he’ll talk to you in a hushed voice, encouraging and praising you and assuring you that once you’re all better he’ll help you with whatever you need and EVERYTHING will be well in the end ٩(ó｡ò۶ ♡)

he’s a senstitive person so he just wants to be there for you in any shape and form he can be

[marvelslut16]

Idiots in love

Pairing: William ‘Bill’ Weasley x reader 

Synopsis: (Y/N) has been in love with Bill ever since she met him their first year at Hogwarts. Will she finally tell Bill how she feels, like Mrs. Weasley hopes she will, or will Fleur and Ginny’s assumptions about (Y/N)’s love life get in the way. 

Word count: 2.9k+

Warnings: Angst. Dumb asses pining after each other. Fleur, if she counts lmao. Brief mentions of death. 

A/N: This has been sitting in my drafts for months, I wrote it as a self indulgent piece since I can’t date Bill in Hogwarts Mystery and I wasn’t sure if anyone would actually read it. It's cannon divergent. Also, tell me if you want a part 2!

My first fic of the new year! Hopefully I'll be way more consistent and inspired this year. Thank you to everyone reading any of the fics I write, I love you all!

“Molly, he’s happy with her,” you roll your eyes at the older woman who had become like a mother to you over the years. 

You met her at Kings Cross Station the morning of your first year, she helped you cross the barrier, your parents are muggles who are afraid of anything different. You were in Bill’s year, the two of you becoming fast friends on the train ride. Through your years at Hogwarts you two became inseparable, both becoming Head Girl and Head Boy together. You two always studied together, explored the castle together, went to Hogsmeade together, you did everything together. Well, except one thing, you didn’t fall in love together; you fell for him, and he fell for that foul, loathsome Emily Tyler and now Fleur Delacour.

You spent almost every Christmas Holiday under the burrow’s roof, along with most of your summers. The burrow was your real home, and the Weasley’s were your family. After you and Bill had graduated Molly and Arthur insisted you use their first names, both convinced you and Bill would finally get together. But that didn’t happen, you both went separate ways, barely even owling over the years. He went on to be this fantastic cursebreaker for Gringotts, getting sent all the way to Egypt. And you, you became the astronomy professor at Hogwarts, you thrived in the subject and Professor Sinistra transferred to Uagadou.

“But you’re perfect for him,” Molly nags. You loved the women with your whole heart, but she really needed to learn when to drop matters of the heart. Especially when the topic of discussion was set to arrive soon. 

“Not everything works out how we want it to,” you sigh as you hand her a clean dish to dry, you had wanted to clean the dishes the muggle way. “Especially when it involves one's heart.”

The two of you are waiting for everyone to arrive, Arthur is picking the kids up from the train now that it’s summer holiday. You had apparated to the burrow after the students boarded the train, now officially a part of the Order. Dumbledore and Sirius are dead, but that just means that everyone needs to fight harder. 

“I just want you to be happy,” Molly’s eyes are soft and sad as she looks at you. 

“I am,” you smile through the lie. There’s a pop from the living room, assuming it’s just Charlie you continue. “I don’t need a man Molly, my students make me happy.”

“Mum,” the unmistakable voice of William Weasley calls as he walks towards the kitchen. “I have great news, Fleur and I are engaged! We want to get married this summer!”

You accidentally drop the plate you're washing back into the soapy water, causing some to splash your shirt. For a split second you see Molly’s face fall before she puts on a bright fake smile as she turns to her eldest. You refuse to turn and see him, you thought you had enough time to prepare yourself to see him again, but you didn’t. He refused to see you after he got hurt during the battle of the astronomy tower when he was in the hospital wing and ignored you in the few weeks following.  

“Oh, wow,” Molly tries to come up with a response that won’t upset him. “This quickly?”

“I can’t take the chance, not now,” his mood is hard to read from his voice. He almost seems too defensive when he responds. “Not with everything happening.”

Your heart stops its thumping for a second, you didn’t realize it would hurt this much to see him happy. You want more than anything for him to be happy, but you also know that his mother and sister will never approve of Fleur. And he’ll never be fully happy because of that. But maybe you're wrong, maybe you don’t really know him. Maybe you never did. 

“I can’t believe I signed up for bloody astronomy again,” you can hear Ron complain through the open window before Molly can respond.

“You know you love me,” you holler out the window as Ron and Ginny get closer to the house. They’re the only two at Hogwarts now, they’re growing up so fast. 

“Yeah, yeah professor,” he mutters as he walks through the door before grinning widely at you. 

Even though you had seen Ginny hours ago, the younger girl runs up to you and throws her arms around you. You laugh as she pulls back and makes a face as some of the soap suds transferred to her shirt. 

“You just saw (Y/N),” Ron rolls his eyes at Ginny’s actions.

“Yeah but that’s different,” Ginny defends. “At Hogwarts I can’t talk to her about boys, or eat dinner with her, or ask for Quidditch tips.”

“I’m always up for talking about boys,” you grin down at the red headed girl. You laugh and apologize to Molly as Ginny pulls you from the kitchen and up to her room. 

You don’t glance at Bill, you can’t. You’re too scared that all of the feeling you have bottled up will resurface with just one glance. You miss the way his eyes soften at your interaction with his sister, and how they trail after you as you get pulled past him. You sit with Ginny as she fawns over Harry for close to an hour, interjecting occasionally when she asks for your opinion. This is what you always imagined having a younger sister would feel like. 

“What about you?” she asks with a teasing tone in her voice. 

“What about me?” you laugh lightly as your eyebrows furrow in confusion. 

“You and professor Snape,” she’s smirking. 

“Severus?” you laugh before your face pulls into a disgusted look only Ginny can see. “We’re coworkers. Dare I say friends. And he’s a part of the Order, we have to at least tolerate each other.”

“Mhm,” she sounds unconvinced. “He smiled at you the other day! In the Great Hall, where people could see! He never smiles!”

“Ginny, we’re friends,” you try to get through to the stubborn teen. “Plus he’s known me since I was eleven, that would be gross.”

Before Ginny can respond there’s a knock on the open door, you turn around and see Bill for this first time in years. His red hair still falls to his shoulders, and he still has that fang hanging from his ear. There are scars down his cheek now, those and the fang make him look bad ass. Your heart stutters as your eyes meet his, the heartache that disappeared when you were gossiping with Ginny resurfaces with just one look.

“Dinners ready,” he says before turning and walking back down the stairs. 

Dinner is loads of fun, the two eldest Weasley’s joining the group since there’s a small Order meeting afterwards. Dinner is full of Charlie joking with you, something you're happy about since Ginny wouldn’t be able to bring up Severus again. You ignore the giggles and the French accent that poke holes in your heart as Bill only pays attention to Fleur, who showed up at the Burrow when you were upstairs. 

After dinner you agree to show Ron and Ginny some Quidditch moves you had picked up over the years, borrowing an old broom left behind by one of the other boys. Remus and Tonks appear in the front yard, signaling that the meeting would start momentarily. Ron thanks you as he continues to practice the moves as you fly to the ground. Ginny follows you, wanting to get a drink from the kitchen before it's closed off to the youngest two. 

“Are you going to take his last name, or is he going to take yours?” she teases. 

“Ginny, not now,” you sigh, not sure how to get it through her head that you have no feeling for the potions master without revealing that you’re in love with her oldest brother. You aren’t sure who’s worse, her or Molly. 

“Alright, whatever you say Mrs. Snape,” Ginny wiggles her brows in your direction as you head for the kitchen. 

“Mrs. Snape?” Severus’s monotonous voice comes from behind you two. Ginny’s eyes widen before she takes off running, and a strangled sound leaves your lips.

“Ginevra Molly Weasley, that’s a month of detention next year!” you yell after her. You take a breath before turning to stare into Snape’s obsidian eyes. “Ginny saw you laugh at my stupid joke in the Great Hall a few weaks ago and now she’s convinced you have feelings for me.” Severus raises his eyebrows at you before looking in the direction Ginny ran off in. “She’s just a kid Sev, don’t hold her delusions against her.”

“Weasley’s,” he mutters before heading to the kitchen himself. Dumbledore had told a select few in the Order the plans for Severus to kill him so Draco didn’t have to, and since the Headmaster was already dying nobody was as mad as expected. “Don’t you have feelings for the oldest one?”

“Be quiet!” you hiss, as look to make sure no one heard. He smirks before walking into the room where the meeting is to be held, leaving you standing confused in the hallway.

The meeting is small tonight; Remus, Tonks, Charlie, Molly, Arthur, Sev, yourself, Bill, and Fleur. The rest had prior engagements unfortunately, so it was essentially just family and Severus. 

Molly uses her magic to pour you a glass of tea as you sit beside Sev, the only open seat. You smile a quick thanks before lifting the cup to your lips. The warm liquid soothing your tired throat, students liked to talk over you during the last week of school so your throat was a little raw. 

“Do you want a cookie with that, love?” Snape’s monotonous voice is slightly louder than it normally is. The term of endearment comes as such a shock that you spit out the tea that's in your mouth, landing across the table on Fleur. 

There was no denying that Severus’s question was directed at you, he’s holding the plate full of Molly’s cookies right next to your face. The room goes deathly silent as the seconds pass by. Ginny, who was getting herself some pumpkin juice, drops the glass she was holding, it shatters when it hits the ground. Molly, Arthur, and Charlie abruptly stop their conversation to stare at you and Sev in shock. Remus furrows his eyebrows as he looks between you two, Tonks looks like she's holding back a laugh. A flash of pain seems to cross Bill’s face before it goes blank, and horror crosses Fleur’s when your tea lands on her. 

“I’m so sorry!” you cover your mouth, thankful the liquid wasn’t warm enough to burn. Bill doesn’t even turn to look at his fiancee, just stares at you. 

“Are you alright?” Snape has a small smile only you can see. You aren’t sure how to respond, especially as you stare at the amusement dancing in his onyx eyes. 

“I knew it!” Ginny yells, finally breaking the few seconds of silence, seconds that felt like years. You flick Sev’s leg under the table, and he has the audacity to grin larger.

“Thanks honey,” your eyes narrow slightly as you grab a cookie off the plate, passing it to Bill without looking away from the man in all black. 

The rest of the meeting is awkward, and as soon as it’s over you pull Sev out of his chair and outside. The cool night air cools your burning cheeks and he lets out a laugh that he had been holding in.

“What was that?” you pull at the ends of your hair. 

“We made your precious Weasley jealous,” even though he’s smirking, there’s no change in his inflection. 

“And now they all think we’re together!” your voice is high pitched and squeaky. 

“Good luck with that,” he disapparates before you can respond.

“I hate you!” you yell at the spot where Severus was just standing.

“You and Snape, huh?” Charlie’s voice cuts through the silent night. 

“Not bloody likely,” you roll your eyes, before plopping onto the ground. Charlie joins you as you lay and stare up at the stars. “He heard Ginny saying she thought he liked me, and he knows who I like, so he decided to run with it. He’s actually fun when you break through his cold exterior.”

“You still love Bill,” it isn’t a question. No matter how many times you denied it while you three went to school together, Charlie never believed you. 

“Yeah,” you sigh, turning to look at him. He’s already facing you so you continue, “your mum kept going on about how I should be the one with him this afternoon. She won’t drop it.”

“I love my brother,” Charlie makes sure you keep eye contact with him as he continues. “But he’s being stupid. I agree with mum, you should be the one marrying him.”

“He’s happy without me,” your voice comes out sadder than you thought it would, guard finally down. “We’ve barely talked in years, and he wouldn’t even let me see him after the attack. He doesn’t need me, nor does he want me in his life anymore.”

Charlie just sighs, annoyed that neither you nor Bill could see the truth starring you both in the face. You love each other. Charlie just lies next to you in comforting silence, staring at the night sky until he has to head back to Romania and you off to bed. 

A single tear slips down your cheek as you lay down in the bed that once belonged to Charlie. Ginny enters the room without knocking, and you quickly wipe away the tear. 

“Why didn’t you tell me!” she practically screams. 

“There’s nothing to tell, he was messing with you, Gin,” you look her directly in the eyes so she knows you aren’t lying. 

“What aren’t you telling me?” she sits beside you on the mattress. 

“I’m in love with Bill,” you whisper, finally saying the words out loud. Sure you had agreed with Charlie earlier, but you had never said the five words out loud before. It feels like a weight is lifted off your chest, until a new wave of heartache hits you. “I have been since we were in school, and it hurts Ginny. Fleur, she’s perfect, I couldn’t possibly compete with her.”

“You’re so much better than her, (Y/N),” Ginny grabs your hand, causing you to look up at her. “And he’s a fool if he doesn’t see that.”

“Thanks Gin,” you smile sadly, squeezing her hand before she heads off to her room. 

--

“Zank you,” Fleur’s French accent is the first thing you hear in the morning. Ginny comes up behind you as you stand in the hallway, and puts her hand on your shoulder. Today is the day you forget about all of this foolish childish love you have for Bill. 

Molly watches you closely as you sit down at the breakfast table, Ginny plopping down beside you. As you talk to the young girl about Quidditch over breakfast, a black owl flies through an open window. You roll your eyes as it plops a letter beside you, you give the owl some of your toast before it flies out of the window again. Ginny looks over your shoulder as you open the letter, the rest of the Weasley’s not-so-secretly watch you read it. 

The letter isn’t anything special, just Severus letting you know that you had left a book at Hogwarts. You know full well he’s being his dramatic self, going out of his way to send an owl, just so he can say he was right. He even added a p.s, asking if Bill had gotten jealous yet. You laugh at the ridiculous question, causing Bill to excuse himself and walk outside. Fleur doesn’t move from her seat, causing you and Ginny to make a face at each other.

A few moments pass before you decide to follow your old best friend against your better judgment, but someone should check on him. He’s in the backyard pacing like a madman, running his hands through his long hair and pulling on the tips. 

“Bill?” you ask softly. He whips around and looks at you, once again his face is hard to read. Your eyes, however, soften as soon as they see what Fenrier Greyback did to him. “What’s wrong?”

“You and Snape?” his voice is hard and cold. “He hated us growing up, and you just pretended that never happened and you're with him? He hated you!”

“It’s none of your business William!” your voice is high pitched, you’re angry. He doesn’t talk to you in ages and now all of a sudden he thinks it’s okay to judge your relationships. “We were annoying kids back then, of course he hated us.”

“You could do better than him!” his anger seems to rise at the use of his full first name. 

“We’re just friends!” your voice is shrill, and you're sure everyone inside can hear you two clearly. “Not that it’s any of your business anyway! Severus was letting me know I forgot some of my belongings at Hogwarts. You have no right to judge who I choose to spend my time with and who I befriend, not when you haven’t tried to talk to me in years Bill!”

With that you turn and head away from the burrow, not wanting to face anyone right now. Especially any of the Weasley's, and most of all, Molly. Bill calls your name as you walk away from him, but you don’t turn around. You can’t. William Weasley has broken your heart multiple times since you met him, and you aren’t about to give him the satisfaction of watching himself break your heart all over again.

Part 2

Permanent tags: @crimson-knuckled-queen​ @rexorangecouny @mrs-malfoy-always​

[angeli-marco-writes]

Bill and Fleur - Our Spot

A/N - I do not own these characters, this is a work of fiction. Fleur is an absolute darling and I absolutely adore her. Please enjoy this cuteness despite the awful writing from my wattpad. It was fun to write in my two best languages as well, even if the French is just in bits.

Warnings - mentions of other character death, fluff, bad English and French for 1.6k words. 

Summary - After the final task, Fleur finds herself in despair, and goes to the only spot she can think of to unwind, not expecting to be approached by a handsome stranger.

AFTER CEDRIC'S DEATH and the events of the maze, Fleur could be found in a hidden corner of the Hogwarts grounds that she'd discovered in her time there. She didn't realise anyone else went over there, until she heard footsteps. She didn't really want to be found, she was heartbroken and kind of traumatised. Inside that maze she'd encountered terrors that she never thought could be real.

She looked up, still wearing her blue velvet tracksuit in the faint moonlight mingling with remaining sunlight, and was met with the strikingly handsome ginger gentleman that she'd marvelled at in the stands, and in the relatives room much earlier on.

"Fleur is it? Are you ok?" he asked softly, going up to her and crouching next to her sitting figure. She wiped her eyes instinctively of mascara mingled tear tracks, even though they'd been dry for a while and met his eyes, nodding.

"Yes, I am ok merci. Cedric dying just upset me. Sorry, my Eenglish is not good. Comment t'appelle tu?" She spoke gently, seeing the man sit down next to her in the grass.

"Je m'appelle Bill. Nice to properly meet you." He held her hand gently and kissed it gently, making her chuckle a little but the smile didn't reach her eyes. "I don't speak much French, but I speak enough to get me through a conversation. and your English isn't too bad." He winked, causing her to smile again.

"I'm so sorry zat you found me here. I'm a mess, covered een mud!" She insisted, pointing to the patches of tried mud and blood stains all over her pale tracksuit, but Bill kept his grip on her hand firmly, so she let it happen, intertwining her fingers with his.

"You're beautiful you know?" He murmured after a moment of silence, making her flush a little despite constantly receiving compliments on her looks. She was startled also at how forward he was, and she felt special, like he really saw her. "I know you're part Veela, I can tell, and my brother said so... but it's not just that. You're beautiful even when you're dishevelled and muddy." He chuckled. "And you were so brave to take on that tournament. as soon as I saw you in the chamber and I saw your eyes, and then I saw you outside the maze and I was rooting for you despite Harry basically being my brother." he continued and she laughed a little.

"You should not 'ave looked at me before ze maze. Your handsomeness distracted me." a coy smirk began playing on her lips. She moved her spare hand up to brush some stray red hair off his face and tuck it behind his pierced ear.

She couldn't help but revel in him, despite her own good looks. He was tall and muscular, freckled with piercing blue eyes and a warm smile. He had quite long fiery red hair which was tied at the base of his neck in a little pony tail which suited him, as well as the fang dangling from his ear. Fleur had never felt this way about anyone before, she'd never been nervous around a guy due to her Veela heritage, but that didn't matter here. Despite only knowing him a short time, she felt that Bill could see who she really was beyond her billowing silvery blonde hair, perfect good looks and terrifying anger.

"You wanna talk about any of it? I don't have to get home for a bit, I was just visiting Harry in the hospital wing with mum, and before you ask, he's fine." He said, seeing the sorrow in her eyes, and she nodded. Bill sat down on the ground and pulled her velvet covered legs into his lap, allowing her to be comfortable.

"I feel like I failed me and my school in zis tournament. I did not complete ze second task in le... le lac. Ron et Harry saved ma Gabrielle. Et I messed up in ze maze, bringing shame on Beauxbatons et Madame Maxime. C'est mon année finalement, I wanted time to do somesing special and I failed. And Cedric-" She paused, a single tear rolling down her cheek. "We were friends, ze four of us. Because of this task. And now 'e is gone. I'm so sad he's been killed." 

A lump began forming at the back of her throat and all her pent up emotions from the past year were being released. Bill could somehow tell that she'd be shunned if she showed this emotion to her classmates or headmistress, so he let her cry it all out, wrapping a reassuring arm around her.

"Fleur, you didn't fail your school. You performed admirably in this tournament. It's designed to test you and put you out of your depths ok? Quite literally in that second task, and no one blames you. You were an admirable champion and you've brought glory to your school in your final year, that's nothing to be ashamed of. And Cedric. I know you were friends, Harry wrote to me. Cedric lived in the same village as my family, I saw him growing up; the same year as my brother-" He began, but was cut off by a confused expression from Fleur.

"Your brother eez en Harry's year, non?" She asked with a bemused face, perfectly illuminated in the moonlight, and he laughed, having to gather himself before continuing. He held her legs closer to him, absently drawing shapes on her joggers, but she didn't mind.

"I have five brothers and a sister," He said, and her jaw dropped in response. "There's me, I'm 24, Charlie's 22, Percy's 18, Fred and George are in 6th year here so they're 17, Ron is in Harry's year so 15 now, and Ginny my sister is a year below Ron, she's 13."

Even after he finished, Fleur still looked astonished.  She was admittedly a little awestruck, and it took her a while to speak, to find the words. Bill couldn't care less, he could sit with this beautiful young woman in his old spot under the stars forever.

"You 'ave a grande famille!" She said and he chuckled to himself, their oceans of eyes connecting and forming a bond. "It's just me and ma soeur Gabrielle, she eez almost ten." Her heart seemed to glow as well as her cheeks when thinking of her sister, and Bill could instantly tell they were close.

"Family's amazing isn't it? I want a family of my own one day, just maybe not with seven kids..." he said playfully, and her tears subsided, leaving her able to just enjoy his presence.

"It's ok that you're sad about Cedric, you know, a lot of people are, and you'll be able to go to his funeral. But the ones that love us never really leave us do they?" She nodded, a smile meeting her eyes this time. "There's that gorgeous smile. I know I only saw it at the start of the task and I've only known you, what a day? Properly, less than an hour, but your smile is wonderful." He marvels at her perfect pearly white teeth and her dusty pink lips. 

He didn't mind that she was donning a dirt covered tracksuit with mud and blood on her face, he didn't mind that her hair was messy and held together by a breaking hair bobble, he didn't mind that they didn't speak the same language or that she'd just cried to him. Bill just enjoyed her company and honestly never wanted their meeting to end.

"So, when school ends, what are you gonna do?" He inquired, breaking the silence and pulling Fleur in closer to him, she happily agreed and nuzzled her head in his neck.

"I'm working at Gringotts 'opefully, maybe just in a shop, to make my Eenglish better. Just for ze summer." She smiled before asking him a variation of the same question and seeing his eyes light up.

"I'm a curse breaker for Gringotts!" He grinned, and she joined him, her cheeks beginning to ache. "I was working in Egypt, but now things are getting bad here, I'm gonna work at the main building in England. Guess I'll be seeing you at work then." He teased and nudged her lovingly which she thought was more than amiable.

"You will 'ave to 'elp me," she gazed up at him with wide eyes and he nodded almost immediately in agreement.

"Anytime..." he murmured, their faces getting closer until their lips were inches from one another. "We shouldn't do this. we'll be working together and I'm years older than you." 

He tried to reason his desire, but couldn't even convince himself as their lips met in a lustful kiss. Their lips moved in unison, understanding one another, and they didn't dare let go until they couldn't breathe.

"Madame Maxime will want me at ze carriage now. Eet was nice to meet you, Bill Weasley." She blushed as she stood up and scrambled away, the moonlight reflecting off her hair, but Bill hurried after her and caught her wrist.

"Here." He said, slipping a hair bobble on her wrist. "Yours is about to break, and I know how often they go missing. A token to remember me by, until I see you next month of course." He flushed himself, his cheeks matching his hair, as she stood on her tiptoes to plant a kiss to his cheek.

"Fleur Isabelle Delacour. I come to England on ze 10th of July."

And with that, she ran off into the starry distance, he could see her small frame turn into a faint shadow as he smiled to himself. Maybe it wasn't so bad that someone found his old spot, maybe it was their spot now.

[phoenixhalliwell]

Well Helloooo Nurse

Pairings: Will Miller  X Gender Neutral Reader ( Nurse Lark but goes by the name of Birdie) 

Word count: 1887

Author's Note: Good Evening all, welcome to the Will Miller show. Please be gentle as it’s my first time writing for him. I also have no idea how the inside of an ER works, i’m just winging this whole thing lmao  I hope whoever stumbles on this enjoys it :) 

Hope you don’t mind the tags: @lilacyennefer​ @cinewhore​ @dignityneeded

Thanks to his idiotic brother, Will ends up in the ER. Benny in an attempt to make amends, tries to be his wingman. 

Throwing yourself down into your chair, you let out a small cry at the relief at finally being off your feet. To say it's been a long week is an understatement. Your back is in agony, your stomach won't stop growling  and there's a throbbing pain behind your eyes . The ER has finally quietened down after a disastrous morning and you're counting down the minutes until it's home time.  

'Is it just me or is time moving slower?'

You glance at the clock. Another 20 minutes  and you are free for the next two days to do absolutely nothing. Closing your eyes you smile at the thought of the large glass of wine, warm bath and take out that awaits you when you get home. Your happiness is short lived though when you hear your name being called out.

'Urghhh, just leave me alone'

"Birdie, my good friend. How are you? You are looking fiiinnneee today, is that a new pair of scrubs."

Opening your eyes, you glare at your friend Letti who is currently batting her eyes at you. You scoff. You  know for a fact you look like shit. Your hair looks like a bird's nest ( no pun intended) and you're pretty sure that your scrubs have seen better days.

"What do you want?" you narrow your eyes at her.

"You know how you're my absolute best friend and you love me so much? Could you find it in that golden heart of yours to stay on just a little longer and cover the end of my shift. It's only a couple extra hours. I wouldn't normally ask but Scott has managed to ship the kids off to his mum's tonight and it's been so long since we've had adult time, if you catch my drift. Please. Help me out here Birdie I am dying" She begs.

'Pfft least you're getting the option for adult time' you think to yourself.  You watch as she clasps her hands to her chest and starts to give you the sad puppy dog eyes .You can feel your resolve start to crumble. Groaning, you throw your head back in defeat.

"Fine, but you owe me one and you better believe I will collect" you sigh. Letti fist pumps the air before grabbing your face and giving you a quick kiss on the cheek.

"I fucking love you Birdie. I will name my next child in your honour"  she promises.

"Yeah like I haven't heard that before" you snort, wiping your cheek. Letti suddenly thrusts a clipboard into your hand before rushing  you through your next patient, eager to get home to her husband. You're not really listening to her, nodding along  every so often as you try to decipher the chicken scratches on the paper in front of you.  

' Did a child fill in this form?'  

You hear snippets of what she is saying: "Hotter than sin..... If I wasn't married...  wouldn't be able to walk straight"

You are finally able to pick out the important information:  

Exam Room 3 - William Miller, 40, laceration to left arm.

'Ok I can work with that'

Calling out your goodbyes to Letti  and telling her to have a good time, you make your way to exam room 3 to get started. Drawing back the curtain, you step into the room and  call out

'Mr Miller?'

"Yes?" two voices answer at the same time.  

" They are talking about me Dumbass, I'm the one that's currently bleeding no thanks to you. Please excuse my brother, he was dropped on his head a lot as a child"  your patient apologises to you. You let out a snort at the quip.  It's not until you get a proper look at his face that  your laughter is quickly cut off.

'Oh' is all you can think before your mind goes blank. Sitting in front of you is a man you can only describe as an Adonis.  Even though his face is twisted slightly in pain, you would gladly stare at him  for the rest of eternity. Beautiful  blue eyes, soft blond hair, a well groomed beard. Your mind  takes you to some bad places when you think about that beard.

'Hotter than sin indeed...."  

A choked out laugh causes you to tear gaze away from William and over to the other man in the room who waves at you looking far too amused.

'Oh god, he knows I was checking out his brother' You cringe internally.

"Hi I'm Benny in case you were interested" the other man jokes. He is also a fairly attractive man  -you can see some similarities between the two. However, Benny has nothing on his brother. You shyly nod your head in greeting before making your way to Will's bedside.

"Ok Mr Miller, I am Nurse Lark. From what I could make out from your form, it says that you have a laceration on your left arm. Is this correct?"  you ask the older Miller.

"Yes that's right. Sorry about the scrawl, Benny didn't make it past the 3rd grade."  Will  teases.

"Fuck you dickhead" Benny hisses back.

"Boys, settle down, this is an ER  not a playground " you interject. Both men mumble their apologise and you try not to laugh. Gently picking up Will's arm, you turn his arm left to right to get an idea of  the extent of his injury. He's lucky in the fact it's not too deep. Unfortunately it cuts directly through the tattoo on his lower arm. Potentially a future scar but that was out with your control. Raising your head, you notice how close you are to each other's faces. Will stares back at you and you lose yourself for a minute.

"For fuck sake, get a room" You hear Benny mutter behind you. You cough and busy yourself getting the equipment you need to start patching Will up.

"I'm sorry but this might hurt a little"  you warn him in advance.

" Don't worry about me, I'm tough as nails " He smiles reassuring you.

You nod before getting started. So focused on your work, you didn't notice Will admiring you from where he sat. He liked the way  your eyes never wavered from your task despite Benny blabbering on in the background. How your nimble fingers made quick work of his wound. He thought the way you stuck your tongue out slightly in concentration was the cutest thing.

Benny was quick to notice his brother's heart eyes and started snickering.

" You know what Will? Maybe if you're a good boy the nice nurse will kiss it better once they are done"

You glance up in time to see Will's face turn scarlet. 

'Just when I thought he couldn't get any cuter'

"That's it, Benny get out now!" Will  growled.

Benny sighs dramatically and sulks out the room but not without muttering "just trying to help you get laid dickhead". You glance back at Will who is now staring up at the ceiling, looking as though he wants the ground to open up and swallow him whole.

"It's days like these I really wish my parents had got me a puppy instead of a little brother"

"Well from what I've seen of him so far, the man is basically a gold retriever in human form" you joke back. The laugh he lets out catches you off guard.

'I  could get used to that sound.'

You had to stop yourself from sighing and scolded yourself for acting like a love sick fool instead of the professional you are.

The conversation came easy for you both after that.  You started by telling him your name before the both of you shared little tidbits about each other. Will seemed like an interesting man from what information he gave. He was funny and incredibly smart.

'He's perfect'  is all you could think. However, it didn't take long after Benny got asked to leave to finish patching the rest of Will's arm up.  

"Well Mr Miller, I guess that's you done. Please make sure to keep the area as clean as possible and have someone help you change your bandages"

You feel sad at the idea of him leaving. It is evident that he feels the same by the way he stalls collecting his things. He looks like he's debating with himself before he finally turns to you looking determined.

" Would you maybe like to go to dinner with me sometime? I know we haven't met under the best circumstances but I had a really great time talking with you. I'd end up hating myself if I didn't at least ask"

Your heart races at the question and you don't hesitate to tell him yes. His face lights up and you find yourself falling a little more for Will Miller. Grabbing a pen from your top pocket, you hastily write down your phone number and hand it to Will. You both wish each other goodnight before parting ways. You find yourself grinning and bite your lip to try and contain your glee.

" Guess  I will be naming my first child Letti"

 Outside the hospital

Benny leans against the wall (pouting like a child) and waits for his brother . He still can't believe he got thrown out of the room. It feels like forever and a day before Will finally makes his appearance with a smug grin on his face.

'He looks like the cat that got the cream'

' What's with the grin man? Did they give you the good shit for the pain or something?"

Will shakes his head before showing Benny the piece of paper in his hand. A set of digits.

"William, you sly dog" Benny laughs in delight before he slaps Will's arm. He's quick to realise his mistake when his brother grunts in pain clutching his bad arm. Benny panics and makes to touch him but is stopped in his tracks.

"Don't . Fucking . Touch me.  Just get in the fucking car. " Will hisses. He marches off to the car park, swearing under his breath.

'Well that victory was short lived' Benny thinks, following his brother.

Bonus Scene - Date night

'Is it just me or is time moving slower?'

You glance at the clock for what feels like the millionth time. Another 10 minutes before Will is suppose to arrive. It's been so long since you were last on a date and you can't remember being this nervous. You look down at your outfit and run a hand over it to make sure there wasn't any creases. Will had text earlier to let you know to dress casual for your evening out but wouldn't give you any more information. The sound of the doorbell interrupts your thoughts and you let out a nervous giggle.  Trying not to seem too eager, you give yourself a beat before  opening the door. You feel yourself go weak in the knees. Will is dressed to impress - A black leather jacket over a soft grey t-shirt with a nice pair of black jeans that does wonders for him. He lets out a soft laugh at the way you are blatantly eyeing him up before doing the same to you. He lets out a low whistle.

"Well hellooo nurse"

[reversecreek]

pops hip n winks at the dash. haaaaiiii. me again. i’ve honestly missed playing lana fr a while she’s one of. my most treasured muses bc she’s jst a silly n vivacious ball of sunshine or alternatively? a train wreck depending on which way u turn her in the light..... i actually hv two playlists made fr her n one is rly old bt it’s more like. songs that Remind me of her which u can find here n then here is more like. stuff u’ll most often catch her blasting on her record player as she dances around in her underwear w the curtains open. OH and here is her pinterest 🍓⚡

* kristine froseth, cis female + she/her  | you know lana jameson, right? they’re twenty-three, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, a few hours? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to play that funky music by wild cherry like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole cherry red gym socks worn with nothing else, doodling penises in the condensation of a stranger’s car window, a bumper sticker on the back of a convertible cadillac that says ‘scrappy doo is a filthy slut’ thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is june 2nd, so they’re a gemini, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( nai, 24, gmt, she/her  )

HISTORY:

lana grew up in a big house in albany, NY. i picture it w dark oak floors n lots of light furniture. albums framed on walls. mayb some rolling stone covers too frm way bk when of the bands her dad’s label signed. kind of like… a rock star palace w no evidence of children at all. i think i described it best in one of lana’s self paras once when i said the garden ws “as big as it was unloved”

lana’s mum victoria (vic) ws a music journalist w a pretty fruitful career ahead of her when she met lana’s dad richard (rich). his record label ws jst starting out, founded on the coattails of his wealthy best friend’s (jensen peters) investment w his other best friend (who he jst calls knoxville). it rocketed to success when they signed poppy injects, a rock band w an electric stage presence, n vic ws drawn to the glitz n glamour of a man tht ws at the helm of his aspiring industry. their love ws very impulsive, all or nothing right frm the start, n it ws almost like she ws mre in love w his accomplishments n what he represented than him.

(DRUGS TW) anyway so jameson records repped a few rock bands bk in the eighties, altho poppy injects r who they’re mostly known fr, namely bc of hw brightly they crashed n burned. they were a big chart success bt the lead singer hd quite an intense struggle w heroin (wsnt rly subtle abt it either while he ws in the public eye as u cn probably imagine frm such an on-the-nose band name) n he ws always in n out of the papers. it eventually brought down his career n it ws a big publicity nightmare

lana pretty much… grew up around figures like this throughout childhood. real characters who wld kind of… b extremely volatile n destructive abt their troubles. the jameson house was an open one as welcoming clients went n a lot of parties took place there. a lot of the time musicians wld b snorting lines in the kitchen when she wnted to grab a bowl of cereal fr breakfast n it was just. a very strange environment fr a child to grow up in. more zoo than home. more shaken snow globe than resting place. (END OF TW)

(ABORTION REFERENCE) her parents always kind of jst… didn’t like her much. her older brother caleb ws unplanned bt they sort of welcomed the surprise more bt… quickly realised they weren’t cut out fr parenthood n then when lana came as another surprise 3 yrs later they didn’t even try to hide their resentment abt the situation. her mum ws actually booked in to have an abortion bt cldnt go through with it at the last minute. once when lana ws a kid she asked her why she’s so cold towards her she jst turned her head frm her dresser, looked at her, told her abt this n said “idk why i didn’t go”. lana didn’t kno wht to say to tht so she jst left her room n closed the door (END OF REFERENCE)

(DISSOCIATION TW) bc of the intensity of her parents ignoring her growing up lana adopted this sense of like…. she didn’t rly kno what it ws bt it ws a delusion of sorts where she thought she ws a ghost bc she gt this strange outside feeling. she’d jst sort of… drift around the halls w no-one acknowledging her n sometimes she ws jst convinced she wsnt actually there or they cldnt see her n she ws jst haunting the house frm a previous family. (END OF TW) her imagination festered an explanation out of smthn she didn’t understand essentially. lana used her imagination to do this a lot growing up. it ws kind of like the band aid she slapped over everything. after all she wasn’t alone if she was sword fighting imaginary pirates dwn the hallway with a poker from the fireplace. 

the one saving grace tho tht sort of?? gt her thru this n made her feel Seen ws caleb. lana quite genuinely hs always thought the sun shines out of her older brothers ass like she jst thinks. he’s the best person in the entire world. wld b rly bewildered if anyone questioned tht. he wld always look out for her n cut the crusts off her sandwiches (he’d cook fr them most of the time bc their parents were too busy/didn’t care to) n sometimes wld even sleep at the bottom of her bed curled up like a guard dog. it ws always lana n caleb n his best friend tommy against the world in tht house (tommy lived next door bt was always over bc he had very strict parents tht he found suffocating)

(ARMY MENTION) SO when tommy announced tht he’d signed up to the army (bc of pressures from tommy’s military dad to fulfil some kind of stupid “legacy” tommy didn’t even care abt) n caleb said he was going with him lana ws understandably…….. completely blindsided. she ws rly upset tht they were leaving n was kind of like “wtf why are u doing this like what do u even think this is gna solve” etc n begged caleb not to leave her there on her own n jst to not sign up in general bc tommy had to bt he didn’t listen. 

ERM i won’t go into it but it didn’t turn out well as u can probably imagine bc the army is a terrible industry n caleb had to return home without tommy. he wasn’t the same after that. (END OF MENTION)

what’d been a rly close relationship before where he ws basically like a surrogate father figure to lana was Not there any more. he ws rly withdrawn n always pushing her away n snapping at her for the sake of getting her to leave him alone. on top of this lana had a lot of shit go down while he was away n rly just shouldn’t have been a kid alone in tht house. regardless lana thought if she kept grinning as wide as she cld she’d convince caleb to join in too. maybe if she seemed fine n happy he’d take the lead. maybe she’d believe it too n start to feel it n everything could go bk to how it was before her world became so different. lana liked the way the sky flipped when she tipped her head back on the swings bt this was different. everything was upside down bt this didn’t make her belly feel like she’d swallowed a butterfly and it wasn’t funny bt still, she kept laughing. always desperate to find something to laugh at n if she couldn’t find it she invented it. as long as ur laughing the world can’t b that bad.

she ws always well liked in school bc she jst tended to treat everyone like they were bffs no matter who like u cld have literally bumped shoulders w her once in the corridor n she’d be like OMG HAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII let’s kiss<3 n like she ws a huge notorious flirt w any n all as well as incredibly impulsive n jst. wild honestly to put it simply too bt things like. changed a bit frm 16 onwards. (HYPERSEXUALITY & IMPLIED TRAUMA TW) she jst became far more reckless honestly n like....... jst didn’t rly seem to care after a certain point abt herself too much.... got herself in a bunch of bad situations.......... kind of jst flung herself to the wolves numerous times without any caution abt the way they’d bite. formed a lot of self destructive habits one of which ws cruising craigslist personals fr random hook-ups n like. she literally cld have wound up in a ditch somewhere honestly it’s a shock she hasn’t. despite various dips n inclines in her journey navigating this side of her it’s very much still present in her life to this day n she struggles to kno hw to control herself at points. sometimes she feels like a melting candle tht needs moulding by thumbs until it can form a person again. sometimes she’s only sure she’s real when she’s being touched. (END OF TW)

ANYWAY. laughs nervously. went to college to study dance bc she’s always loved dance in general bt specifically ballet (despite definitely not hving the discipline for it) n honestly this was both good n bad fr her. had a whole string of terrible heartbreaking relationships bc she tends to fall into those hard n fast n they were w a lot of bad people fr like 98% of the time. she kind of learned more abt what love is during her time there tho which is a gd thing bt she still isn’t very good at knowing hw to believe she deserves it so it’s a process. she hd fun tho. threw 498572598475 outrageous n elaborately themed parties. ws friends w pretty much everyone on campus. 

despite a strained relationship w her brother n having to go home to visit n check on him whenever he got rly bad it ws the first time it actually felt like she’d found a home in a lot of rly loving n genuine friendships n lana will never forget hw much that experience meant to her even if she definitely struggled there too. college felt like a place she belonged n then suddenly she couldn’t belong there any more n there was a big sense of floundering in that. like where do u go now when u’ve never known home elsewhere? how do u happily go out into the world if it means leaving ur world behind?

she applied to a dance company in LA n fell in w a pretentious art scene there full of wannabe andy warhols n the like. became a makeshift edie sedgwick to some guy w dyed white hair n the idea his every concept was revolutionary when rly he jst shot her dancing barely clothed splashing around in a random fountain in his friend’s mansion on an ancient film camera. she’d spend her days floating around on lilo’s and prancing in feather boas and racing with glitter leftover frm last night in her leotard w smudges of faint red lipstick to barely make her job on time. always a sexy train wreck bt this time? make it hollywood. 

(IMPLIED ALCOHOLISM TW) i won’t lie to u lana hs always partied way too hard bt then partying way too hard turned into slurping merlot thru a crazy straw shaped like a flamingo at 4 in the afternoon wearing penis novelty sunglasses n it wasn’t quite so much of a party when u were doing it on ur own. this rly snowballed into place in college bt carried on n wound up getting her fired from the dance company bc she turned up to rehearsals drunk one too many times n they didn’t allow fr sloppiness like tht. it was a “professional operation” that didn’t “accept that kind of behaviour” bt lana was jst like ummmmmmmmm that’s totally dramatic btw way to spank me in the town square like i’m gale w a raw ass n back in the hunger games bt ok sure i’m out ig. BOOP! (literally booped the director on the nose before leaving) (END OF TW)

honestly hd no idea what to do w herself after her job fell thru in LA n was pretty embarrassed actually upon sobering up the nxt day. cldn’t bring herself to tell her friends for a hot minute bc she felt like a failure or smthn n she was meant to be living this glamorous life out there being the classic wild n silly n fun Lana Jameson. cldn’t figure out how to repackage it into a funny story tht wouldn’t worry ppl. eventually wound up jst caving n telling her closest besties (shoutout freya n rosa) bc she ws hving a weird time dating losers n randomly living in LA even tho she didn’t kno why she was there any more after losing the job n they were jst like. fk it then. jst come here. we’re in irving. and so? mizz jameson packed her bags....

PERSONALITY:

always smells vaguely of wild cherries or strawberry starburst or jst the candy aisle in general. if she ws a vinyl record she’d b this one n she’d only play good vibrations by the beach boys, dancing on my own by robyn, play that funky music by wild cherry, femme fatale by the velvet underground n (i can’t get no) satisfaction by the rolling stones

the jameson family r pretty well off n bc of her relation to such a big music industry figure she’s hung out w a fair few relatively high rep ppl thru her teens. mostly kids of celebrities n stuff like tht. she amassed a bit of an instagram following #nepotism bt also fr her style (v penny lane-esque in some aspects. lots of fur cuff trimmed jackets bt then also jst…. a wild combination of everything honestly. pastel faux fur coats, seventies style platforms, bright red cowboy boots, pink fishnet tights, holographic stickers of planets on her cheek n glitter used like highlight, 90% of the time a red lip) n bc she’s not gna make ur eyes bleed to look at or anything let’s b real

growing up lana was always a huge social butterfly. knew everyone n everyone knew her. she ws one of those girls tht ws kind of impossible to ignore or forget. very animated, always made u feel like u were the centre of the universe whenever she spoke to u, always made it feel like u were best friends even if ud only spoken to her once.

deliberately puts on tht kind of Magnetic Alluring Act tht femme fatales wear in movies w most ppl. kind of…. is always playing A Role of the person tht she wants to b seen as. hates being sad n always wnts to be happy / making ppl happy. chameleons to situations. feels like she’s performed as the vivacious n fun loving Lana Jameson fr so long tht she doesn’t rly kno who she is beneath tht bt she isn’t too keen to find out. sometimes gets glimpses n feels the urge to close her eyes.

she’s always been rly spontaneous n adventurous. always doing something weird n wild every weekend. she has ten thousand ridiculously absurd n chaotic stories. she’s like oh ya this one time this guy made me ride him with a daddy saddle like i was woody and he was bullseye. he literally made me call him bullseye. or she’s like. oh ya once i had to run barefoot thru a cabbage patch bc this one farmer wanted to have a threeway w me n my friend tht we met off craigslist n every framed photo in his house was a pig dressed up in cosplay bt honestly they were kind of cute n he was sexy aside frm the murderous vibes n the fact he kept calling me babe which i’m pretty sure means he wanted to dress me up next bt like whatever honestly.... she tells jst the most batshit stuff n the person she’s telling it to is left blinking like. wtf.

uncontrollably flirty. insanely confident. cld make a joke out a paper bag n will try. she tends to laugh when she feels like crying n has a smile brighter than a ray of texas sunshine.

likes to roller skate n hs a red pair she’ll glide around in at night lit up by amber street lamps breath sticky w the taste of wine n lollipops probably heading to a random hookups. who needs ubers?

always dapples her fingers thru the breeze when she’s driving in a car w the window down. honestly likes dangling her whole body halfway out too. she almost always has some sort of sweet on her, whether it’s sour haribo cherries or strawberry lollipops.

luvs bowie (ONLY aesthetically) n prince (wholeheartedly) n madonna (completely) n anyone tht’s a vintage style icon w little care fr what ppl think.

daisies n poppies r her fav flowers bc daisies r wild n overlooked n poppies r the first thing u look at in a green field. she’s had like 8472493874 ‘relationships’ n none of them hav lasted beyond a month / hav been terrible / hav seen her being treated badly / she’s cheated on them. honestly it’s like a burning train wreck but u can’t quite tear ur eyes away. often the heart of many sordid gossip scandals.

PLOTS:

TBA bc she’s only jst arrived in town i won’t lie to u all but i’m gna whip things up on here anyway n link in chat w updates at some point........ that said? lana is insatiable n it isn’t rly unlikely tht she cld’ve bumped into ur muse in a grocery store aisle n somehow a wild spontaneous adventure spawned frm that alone.......... if u have any immediate ideas we can discuss 😋

[crowdedimagines]

BFB - Harry Styles

best friends brother an// y’all don’t care but pretend holmes chapel has a big airport lol. 2.6k

“How long are we planning to keep this from her?” Harry asks, tracing his fingers lightly over my bare shoulder. I lean against him, pulling the covers a little higher as the air is cold on bare skin. It’s a question we’ve been struggling with the answer for a long time now.

“I don’t know. You know that Gemma would absolutely freak out if she found out about us.”

Harry and I have been dating for about eight months now. It’s been bliss, better than I could even imagine, other than one thing. We’ve been hiding it from his sister and my best friend. I’ve never kept anything from her before, nothing like this and it’s killing both Harry and I.

“She’s going to hate me.” I whisper, thinking of how angry I’m sure her reaction will be, “I can’t lose either of you.”

“Gem could never hate you, you’re her best friend.” Harry presses a kiss to my temple, “You won’t lose me ever.”

Gemma and I met a few years ago and became fast friends. We bonded over similar personalities and being in need of a loyal friend. She brought me to meet her family one random weekend because her brother was finally home. The whole drive there she talked about how friends in the past have tried to hit on him, or they only get close to her with the prospect of meeting Harry Styles. She made me promise to stay away.

I reassured her over and over that I wasn’t interested in the man that I had never met, I mean sure I would have to live under a rock to have not heard of him. We met that same day for dinner. Both Harry and Anne excited to meet the best friend Gemma was always hanging out with.

I was never expecting to make such a connection to Harry. I wish more than anything that I didn’t know how she felt about Harry because I would’ve asked for his number that night. She caught on to us right away.

After eating we all settled in the living room to continue talking. I should’ve known that getting along with Gemma so well it would apply to the whole family as well. Anne is a sweetheart, making me already feel so welcome in her home.

“I see what the two of you are doing.” Gemma states as soon as Anne goes back into the kitchen.

“What?” I ask turning away from Harry who had been talking.

“Harry, you’re flirting with her, you’ve been eyeing her up since she walked in the door!!”

I grow quiet, unsure of what I could even say to that.

“Gem-” Harry starts.

“I don’t care. Y/n is my friend, you’re not ruining this for me. You two aren’t happening.” Gemma sits a little straighter.

“Sure, the two of you could maybe date a few times, fuck, whatever, but at the end of the day, I still want my best friend. I don’t want to have to separate you after Harry doesn’t call or Y/n doesn’t like the fame. It’s never gonna happen.” Gemma finishes right as Anne comes back with a plate of treats. We all drop the subject and put on smiles, not wanting Anne so suspect anything. Harry and I are silent, still digesting what Gemma just dropped on us.

After that day I shut down even the idea of being with Harry for two years. It didn’t matter that I had never felt that connection with anyone before, Gemma was my best friend. At least it didn’t matter until my job relocated me to Los Angeles.

It was a hard decision to move, but it was a promotion after all so I made the decision to return to the states. Gemma helped me pack up all my things, then I flew across the world for Harry to help me unpack. He was glad to have another friend in Los Angeles. He’s taken up residence in Malibu while working on a new album.

We hung out more and more, Harry happy to have a reason to get out of the studio for a little while and I was just happy to have someone to hang out with that I didn’t work with.

One day however it changed, I drove out to his house for a movie night and one thing led to another. We didn’t let our shared person hold us back for once, and once we did it was impossible to go back to being just friends, but we didn’t want to.

After that we started dating, sneaking and hiding from paparazzi, hiding more importantly from Gemma. We were our own little secret. Harry’s band were the only ones privy to the information. It was hard for them to not figure it out anyway once Harry came in the next day, happier than they had ever seen him. He finished his album and released it, now he finally has some time off before tour starts next year.

“Alright, so you’re coming home for Christmas?” Gemma asks, cheering into the phone.

“Yeah, I’ll be coming home for Christmas.”

Harry looks up and smiles, he loves the fact that I’ll be flying back with him and spending the holiday with his family.

“Thank god, I haven’t seen you in so long! I need my best friend. Do you at least love it there? Otherwise you can totally move back.”

“I miss you too, and yes I love it here. You might have to just move out here instead. I’m out here, your brother’s out here. If you did then we could definitely convince Anne do make the move too.”

Harry smiles once again, I can tell he’s not focused on the book in his hands, rather he’s focused on my conversation.

“I don’t know, I don’t think I’m much of a L.A girl. Do you ever see Harry?”

Her question catches me off guard, Harry too when his head snaps up to look at me.

“From time to time.” I answer.

“Well if you see him before you’re back for Christmas, tell him I say hi.” She laughs.

“I will. We actually booked the same flight so we’ll be flying in together.”

I swallow, hoping that she’s not picked up on anything.

“That’s lovely! It’s a long flight, plus that means only one trip to the airport.”

“Yep, it’ll be good.” I smile, “I’ll see you in a few days, love you.”

“Love ya!”

I hang up the phone and let out a sigh. I throw my back down against the mattress, successfully knocking into Harry’s legs.

“This is killing me.” I groan.

“Only a few more days and then we can tell her.” Harry reminds.

“I know I know, I’m just so nervous. I have a bad feeling.”

“At least we know that my mum will have a good reaction!” Harry crawls down to the end of the bed.

“Yeah?” I turn to face him.

“I’m sure she’ll be thrilled. She’s loved you almost as long as I have.”

“Shut up.” I roll my eyes, I pull lightly on his shoulder so he falls on top of me, “You’re so cheesy.”

“Don’t act like that’s not one of your favorite things about me.”

Only a few days later we pack up a suitcase and board a plane to go all the way to Holmes Chapel. By the time we land, it’s technically Christmas Eve.

“Ahh!” Gemma screams, running towards us as we leave our gate.

She rushes forward to pull us each in for a hug.

“You’re both here!” She smiles.

We walk to Gemma’s car, it’s a short drive to Anne’s house. Harry takes the backseat and lets me sit in front with Gem.

“Y/n, you’re glowing!” Gemma grins and looks between me and the road, “California is treating you right?”

“Yeah, I absolutely love it. I wasn’t so sure at the start, but now I don’t think I’ve ever been happier.”

“Meet any cute boys yet?” She asks.

Harry starts profusely coughing, causing everyone’s attention to go to him.

“Jesus, do you need some water?” Gemma asks.

“Nope, I’m okay. I just had a catch in my throat.”

“Before Harry almost started dying I asked you a question.” Gemma sings the tease, reminding me of her question.

“Yeah, there’s been one guy.”

“One guy?” Gemma cheers, “Give me all of the details.”

“Let’s do it later.” I look out my window and avoid anymore questions for the rest of the ride.

We pull into the driveway and Anne comes out before we even get the chance to grab our luggage.

“Merry Christmas!” She pulls Harry into a hug first. I smile at the interaction.

“Y/n!” Anne says with glee. She pulls me in for a big hug and it makes both of the siblings roll their eyes.

“She’s always been the favorite.” Harry mutters with a laugh.

“Mhm.” Gemma agrees.

Anne pulls away after a while and we all make our way into the house.

“I set up the guest room for you, Y/n.” Anne explains.

“Thank you.”

We all stay up in the living room talking for a while, Anne eventually calls is quits and goes to bed.

“Gem, I need to talk to you.”

“Ooh, is it about your mystery boy?” She grins, setting down her tea. She turns to look at Harry and I on the couch from her spot on the chair.

“Uhh, yeah.”

I look back to Harry for reassurance, he gives me a nod.

“Gem, first and foremost, I love you.”

“Yeah, I love you too.” Her brows furrow, “What’s going on?”

“Harry and I are dating.” I blurt.

She doesn’t even flinch, the room fills with silence. She stares at me, completely unwavering. It’s like she’s waiting for a just kidding or one of us to say ‘gotcha’. It never comes though, I turn to see Harry looks just as concerned as I do.

“For how long?” Her voice is a whisper.

“Eight months.” Harry answers.

“I trusted both of you.” She tries not to whimper.

“We’re both sorry Gemma. We didn’t mean for it to happen.” Harry explains.

Tears fill Gemma’s eyes while she looks between the two of us before she settles on me.

“Everyone has always loved him more. You were the one person that was mine, you were my person. You let him steal you away.”

“No, that’s not what’s happening-”

“Isn’t it though? I can’t believe I thought you were my friend.” She scoffs.

“I’m still your friend!” I cry out.

“Gemma!” Harry scolds.

“No you’re not. You’re his now.”

“Gemma, please.” I sigh, she quickly gets up and starts stomping towards the stairs.

“What? So you don’t love him?” She stops in her tracks to look at me. I come up with no words, I can’t lie about this, “That’s what I thought.”

“Please, Gem, wait!”

“Gemma, come on.” Harry suddenly speaks out

“No, Harry. You’re an ass! You couldn’t let me have one thing? You get everything you want, you always have. Y/n was the one thing.” She yells. I can only hope that Anne is completely out of it.

“Do you want us to break up?” I shout, “Is that what would make you happy, to have both of us miserable? You’re being selfish! You’re supposed to be my best friend and you’re using me like I’m some trading card. I’m a person, I’m not a way for you to one up your brother.”

“Wow, so I’m the bad friend? You’re the one who broke her promise.”

“A promise from over two years ago. A stupid promise.” Harry reminds.

Gemma rolls her eyes and continues up the stairs.

“Cheers, I hope you both are very happy together.” Her words dripping with sarcasm.

We both hear her door shut and neither of us follow her. I turn around in Harry’s arms, he rubs slowly up and down my back as the sobs start.

“I told you so.” I laugh bitterly, tears still falling.

“I’m sorry, love.” He presses a kiss to my forehead.

Harry and I stay like that for a while until the exhaustion hits. I go up to my room and change into pajamas. Harry goes to take a shower before he’ll be back. In the past few months we’ve spent very few nights away from each other. Harry decided he’s going to sneak in.

I tuck myself in, turning out the lights. The bed is big and comfy, but I’m staying up until Harry comes in.

“Come in.” I answer the knock at my door. Why is Harry knocking?

The door opens and I can see with the hall light that it’s most definitely not Harry.

“Gem?” I sit up.

“Can we talk?” She asks.

I nod and pat the spot next to me for her to lay down. She wordlessy walks over and slides in the covers next to me. We both lay on our backs and stare at the ceiling.

“I’m sorry I’m selfish with you.” She states.

“I’m sorry I hid this from you.” I reply.

Without a word she reaches to connect our hands.

“I really do want you to be happy, and if it has to be with him than so be it.”

“Thank you.” I smile.

The door opens again and this time is actually is Harry.

“Oh, hey.” Harry notices Gemma is in here too, “Are you guys talking? I can just go.”

I look to Gemma and raise my brows and she rolls her eyes.

“You can stay.” Gemma says, catching him before he walks out.

Harry smiles and walks back in, climbing into bed on my other side. Thankfully it’s a big bed, we all three fit easily. I roll my eyes, having a jealous Styles on each side of me.

“You know you’re lucky, right?” Gemma sits up to look at him. “You can’t screw this one up.”

“I know, Gem.” Harry smiles.

We all fall into a comfortable silence, we’re all just thinking.

“This is actually going to be really amazing!” Gemma cheers, completely changing her attitude from an hour ago.

“How so?” Harry asks.

“Now she can actually be a part of the family! Y/n, you’re going to be my sister!”

“I thought I already was your sister.” I question.

“You are, but once you both get married, you’ll actually be my sister.”

“Woah, Gem.” Harry laughs.

“I think you’re moving faster than we are.” I tease.

“Whatever, I know both of you. I give it a year before you’re engaged.”

I roll my eyes, but I can’t help but get excited at the prospect of it. I’ve known Harry for years, and I’ve never felt a love like this. I know that if he asked me tomorrow even, I would say yes.

“We’re telling mum about us tomorrow.” Harry informs.

“Please let me be there. This is going to be her favorite Christmas present.”

“What do you mean?”

“She’s been dying for you to be a permanent part of our family for a while now. Plus, she always wanted a second daughter.”

I turn to look at Harry and he nods agreeing with her. His eyes are closed with a smile on his face. I reaches out to put his arm around me, pulling me a little closer to his side of the bed. I let out a loud yawn, it’s been a long day.

“So, are we having a sleepover?” I ask.

Both of the Styles children chime in with yes, making me grin. I didn’t know if it would work out, but now I have them both. Best friend and boyfriend and the best family I could have ever been thrown into.

[disorganizedkitten]

Surprise reminder I am not in fact dead. Happy whatever. I’m brainspewing a bunch of aus, mostly DC/batfam and Harry Potter atm and wanted to share some of my favorite moments from the HP planning sessions. These are... sort of from the same story? It’s evolved enough that I could split it into multiple stories based off which update/version it’s from.

Welcome to my Regulus Black Survives and ends up Raising Harry au that eventually melted into a very fun Twin Au that I hope I finish.

Harry: I CAN DESTROY HORCRUXES BY BLEEDING ON THEM

 Reg also sends him with a communication mirror because it's been four or five years, he's not going to be so callous as to deny he loves his kid.

  So they, being 12 and dumb, end up going in after her/him.

 Upon seeing Riddle leave the diary, Harry and Theo, who were raised by a Black and a Nott respectively, freaked. Theo didn't know what it was for sure, but could tell it was Bad, and Harry saw 75.9% sure it was a horcrux because really. What else can a person materialize out of?

 Riddle proceeds to monologue about how he hadn't expected this, Slytherins and Gryffindors working together? And aren't you a Nott? I wonder how your forefathers would feel. Etc. While Harry and Theo dodge the curses and continue to try to destroy the diary.

 "How can you be so powerful if you were defeated by a baby?!"

 The Basilisk ends up trying to listen to both of them, and then Connor tries to help, and Riddle tries to kill Harry w/ Ukri and Connor tries to take Riddle down, and Theo is darting around and tripping Ukri and Riddle up, while Ron has given up on his wand and is trying to wrestle Riddle, which leaves Harry again to take the diary.

When Sirius breaks out, Harry makes a lot of comments about just… cutting off his left arm. After all, no dark mark, no loyalty to the cause. Crippled, even if he was a loyal follower before. This is also his first elective year, which means that Reg sends him an old prosthetic to unravel for Ancient Runes.  Draco screams when Harry gets an arm in the mail.

Also Theo gets kidnapped by Sirius summer of 95 after he runs away to escape becoming a baby Death Eater. It's in broad daylight and causes so much panic

("I was wondering what that unholy shriek was" "a horcrux dying,")

 This leads to all sorts of hijinks because due to it being accidental, young, and without due process or practice, Fay is essentially an inferi. Except she still has a soul. It's weird. The necromancy-gone-sideways means that they're bonded.

Neville Longbottom and the Suspicious Letters - the Godbrother letters begin!!

 “I thought my brother was supposed to be raising you.” “I can go?” “Absolutely not, someone has to keep you alive.”

Regulus is a panicked box of nerves who accidentally acquired a child who should by all rights be his brother’s, and now he has to keep him

 Harry grew up around Reg who has Very Dangerous Magic™ all over the house, and has the time of his life watching things blow up 

 “Harry you’re going to singlehandedly give me grey hairs”

 “Honestly if it wouldn’t get more attention than I need I’d just kidnap you, they’re such horrid guardians. And I’m a Black, so that’s saying something!

(The Black Family Madness isn't inherited, it's learnt)

Adrian is a mortician because I really liked the idea of a murder basement except no one has ever actually died in the basement.

 Fay Dunbar vs the natural order

Neville Longbottom and the wallflower society

Charlie and Ginny Weasley are Parselmouths bc it makes me happy

 Happy Hogwarts day, Harry! Or should it be Happy Hogwarts Hour, Harry? Since you like alliteration? (I clearly remember Mass-Machete-Murderer).  I’m sad there’s no chance of running into you in diagon today, but hey! Hogwarts is coming soon! And then we can hang out whenever, right? Well, maybe not whenever. I guess we’d have to attend classes and make more friends. But otherwise! No more sneaking around! Unless you're a Slytherin. Then there might be some sneaking. But not as much! (Have we talked about that yet? I’m pretty sure I’m a shoe-in for Gryffindor, but… yeah. If you’re not, that’s completely okay!)  (^letter between Harry and the Other Potter Twin(tm) )

Hey, Harry. Mum just learned you’re a wizard (forgot to ask how, sorry, I’m sure she’ll tell you later) and has decided you need to come live in the wizarding world with us. I didn’t tell her anything. You and your Axe-bear uncle need to figure something out and fast. I’ll see what stalling I can do. XX, your lovely brother. (On the upside, we get 2 c e/o b4 Spt1!) (^Another actual letter from version 2-3 of this au)

 "You know," Theo says to Conner at one point. "It's a bit like Harry was raised by a Black."  Conner shrugs. "He was raised by an ex-death eater with one arm. Close enough." Theo does research and pretty much just figures that whenever Harry says he was raised by a dead man, he means legally. Theo puts his money on Regulus Black early on.

Theo’s a very smart cookie

 Harry also writes letters to Regulus using a constantly changing code which is really just pop culture references.

 We have a bunch of parselmouths this generation. See: Charlie Weasley, Ginerva Weasley. Henry Potter/Peverell. Connor Potter. Fay Dunbar/Black. (Also, Theo Nott, Neville Longbottom, Hermione Granger, and a few others learn it for the sake of keeping up with them).  Bry is… one of those groups.

 Bryony becomes a Basilisk Breeder

 There are five prophecy children bc I can

‘Tuney rushed out “He's not here."  No duh, Connor thought but didn’t say. He hoped the adults had a plan for this, because if Harry and Connor had to come up with stories on their own (lie to their parents) there was no way it would end well.  Three years of letters and visits and Connor still didn’t have a name for Harry’s adult figure. He wondered morbidly if that was going to change today.’

‘Connor decided with a new thread of despair that yep, the adults were going to be lying to each other for the foreseeable future. Ugh.‘

‘When Reg catches Barty, the only one who does, neither of them attack.  "Why, Barty?"  "What else can I do?"  "Join us?"  "That won't be safe. Won't be fair. I'm trying to send one of those boys to their death."  "You're also helping keep them alive. Let me get you out." Barty switches allegiances that night. The moment he has a choice.’

 There are a lot of people who are willing to step away from Voldemort but don’t know how. They got in over their heads decades ago and now they’re stuck.

 That doesn’t mean they’ll sit around and watch their kids make the same mistakes.

[jae-daddy]

Chubby (13)

Jaebum AU Series

one / two / three / four / five / six / seven / eight / nine / ten / eleven / twelve / fourteen

masterlist

Pairing: Im Jaebum x Reader Genre: Romance, Drama, Mature, Angst Plot: you are getting bullied, and jaebum decides to help you a/n: if anybody doesn’t like this, im disowning you. so, i hope y’all like it. this is the fifth try <3 not edited

The first time you had seen Jaebum your whole life changed. The world twisted from its axis, and everything tumbled upside down and sideways. Everything flowed into the beckoning cosmos, leaving only the boy standing in front of you to exist.

The first time you had seen Jaebum was by the supermarket around the corner. It was spring, a week before school came back into session. The cherry blossoms bloomed and rained down on him, drifting into space as the ground disappeared from beneath you. He showed up in front of you like an angel, ethereal; making a calm fall over you and causing the world to explode all at once.

His hair was slicked back showing his forehead and angry eyebrows scrunched in concentration. A leather jacket covered his broad shoulders, and ripped washed jeans exposed his knees as he knelt down. A little white and orange kitten snuggled into his hand. As if just his appearance wasn’t enough to take your breath away; his adoration towards the kitten pulled you further down the tortourious path of falling in love with this man. 

His eyes crinkled as a sweet smile stretched across his lips. His smile was beautiful and radiant that it seized your heart from your chest. Your heart stopped beating as your eyes met his. 

A tear fell from your eyes. 

He was so beautiful.

You walked out of the apartment complex to find Jaebum just like the first day you had seen him. 

You had never seen his hair slicked back since that day, it was normally just a sexy mess. But today, it was like it was the first time you had seen him. He wore a leather jacket and ripped jeans once again, and a simple black shirt underneath. 

“Hi,” you whispered, breathless as you stood in front of him. Jaebum turned around, looking you up and down before raising an eye at the skirt you wore. You remember telling him you were going to wear jeans, but it was a last minute change because the jeans didn’t fit. You pursed your lips, as you adjusted the demin skirt,  “Last minute change.” 

“You look good,” Jaebum said, a corner of his lips lifting, as you handed you a helmet and got onto the bike. “Your hair looks nice like that.” 

You froze behind him, as blush climbed over your cheeks. You had styled your hair today instead of letting it fall down normally. 

“Thanks,” was all you could manage to say without stumbling over your words. 

            ------------------------------------------------------------------

The party was in full swing when Jaebum and you entered the mansion owned by Bambam. As if the house wasn’t impressive enough, the scene in front of you that belonged to a hollywood frat house party made you gawk in amazement. 

You’ve never been to a party; especially one as big this. 

Jaebum sighed at the scene in front you both, before closing his eyes in annoyance. He already looked annoyed and ready to get out, and you hadn’t even been here a proper minute. 

“JB! My man!” Bambam walked over with yellow sunglasses and a sunset printed shirt that you had seen in billboards for expensive brands. “You made it!” 

He hugged Jaebum, before turning around and giving you a tight squeeze. “Glad you could make it too, y/n. I was afraid JB wouldn’t bring you along.” 

Jaebum jokingly glared at Bambam, who chuckled and put both his hands up in surrender. 

“Okay, come on, let’s go meet the guys,” Bambam turned towards the party, just as lazer lights began bleaming over the crowd, shining through low hanging cloud of smoke. “They’ve dying to you see you again, JB.” 

Bambam wasn’t overexaggerating. A group of five guys jumped up from their seat as soon as Jaebum came ten feet within the sofa set they had been sitting on. They all ran towards Jaebum, jumping onto him forming a huge group hug and then all guys greeted him over eachother. 

“HYUNG!!!” 

“Where have you been?!”

“Nice to have you back, bro.” 

“Ohhhh, the mans back!”

“Sup’” 

They all crowded around him, and you stood next to them unsure what to do. You nervously fiddled with the zipper of your jacket, as you chewed on your bottom lip. You felt like a kid at the supermarket, waiting as your mum chatted to a friend she had bumped into.

“Oh guys,” Bambam pulled their attention towards you both, as he put his arm around your shoulder, friendly. “This is y/n. She’s a friend of JB.” 

You shyly, said hi, giving them a small give. They all replied kindly in different volumes and manner which you were starting to realise was their constant way of being. 

          ------------------------------------------------------------------

You were standing around a table of beer pong, where Yugyeom and Bambam were loosing miles behind Mark and Jackson. 

Mark and Jackson had almost half of their cups still left, while Yugyeom and Bambam had two cups left before they lost. 

Bambam took a shot and it went in, making the two boys cheer as if they had already won the game. They chest bumped, as they laughed and boo-ed Mark as he chugged the drink down. 

“Those guys,” Jinyoung shook his head chuckling, as he scooted closer to you. You laughed slightly with him, nervously. 

Jaebum hadn’t left your side even for minute. He always loomed over every conversation you had, checking the cup in your hand, and asking you if you were okay every few minutes. He stood facing the game as he took a sip from his cup.

He wasn’t drinking tonight, and you weren’t too, obviously. 

“They always do this and it’s fun looking from the outside, but when you’re versing them,” he sighed, shaking his head. “You don’t who’s really loosing, because they act like that. 

“Sometimes, the win isn’t even worth it cause you can’t even rub it in their faces as well as they rub getting one shot in.” 

You laughed at that, and you could see what he was talking about as the pair of youngest made another shot. You felt bad for Mark and Jackson, who kept getting annoyed at them more. 

“Have you ever played?” He asked, making you look at him. He was good looking; you couldn’t deny that. Actually, all of Jaebum’s friend’s were attractive and looked like they had walked out of a manga or tv show. 

“No,” you replied, shyly. You felt like you weren’t contributing much to the conversation so you added, “I don’t drink. I’ve never even ever been to a party before.” 

Jinyoung rose his eyebrows in surprise, before nodding shrugging. 

“Why are you surprised?” You asked, was it really that rare for someone not to engage in these kind of activities. 

“Well, it’s not you,” He sighed, shaking his head with a small smile. “You definitely look like a good girl. It’s just that you’re not the type that JB normally has hanging around him.

“Hell, JB never has a girl hanging around him for too long.” He shrugged, as if it was normal. But then looked over at JB, and a small grin grew on his lips, showing perfect teeth. “Well, ofcourse there are exceptions.” 

You turned in Jaebum’s direction confused by what Jinyoung meant. But then you saw a girl wrap her arms around Jaebum’s neck pulling him close, as she hid her face into the nook of his neck. 

You looked away, feeling as if you were intruding an intimate moment. 

Your cheeks tinted red, in a feeling you could not place, as you tried to giving Jinyoung a small smile. 

“YESSS!!! SUCK ON IT YOU LOSERS!!!” Jackson yelled in victory, jumping on Mark, as he stuck his tongue out to the other two boys laughing uncontrollably. It only seemed to make Jackson more annoyed as grabbed Youngjae, and asked him for affirmation of his victory. 

Youngjae just laughed, unable to speak; and laughing harder as Jackson shook him aggressively. 

“Okay, it’s time to break them up,” Jinyoung sighed from beside you, and began walking towards the table. 

“Next game, Youngjae and I,” Jinyoung broke the boys up, before setting the table. “JB you wanna play?” 

“JB play!” The others cheered, making JB sigh in defeat as he nodded his head. He turned towards you, lifting his eyebrows. 

Did he want you to play with him? You’ve never played this before. You don’t even know if you’re good at this. This was a bad idea. But as always Jaebum gave you a look that told you to trust him. 

You shoulders fell as you relaxed slightly, and a small smile came on to your lips. 

“JB and Leena!” Yugyeom cheered, making the others join in. “Like the old times.”

Your lips parted in surprise upon hearing the words.

Your eyes grew, as you felt your cheeks grow hot. You tried not to let your smile fade, as Jaebum kept his eyes on you. 

A feeling you didn’t want to understand tugged your heart, as you stood there trying to be okay. 

It’s just a game.

You nodded at Jaebum, cheering him to join the table where the girl who had hugged him stood waiting for him. 

You gulped, and felt stupid. 

You hoped no one had noticed how you had gotten your hopes up. How your heart was racing that Jaebum had turned to you; how he wanted you. But that wasn’t the reality. 

The reality was Jaebum at the table, with the long haired girl that fit into the picture with others. She was familiar with him; you could tell by the way the other boys treated her. How she was treating Jaebum, like he was the back of her hand, and knew every single thing about him. 

There are exceptions.

She was Jaebum’s exception. Jaebum never let girls hand around him, even you knew that much. 

Jaebum decided to fake date you to stop girls from hovering around him; that’s how much he disliked it. But there have been exceptions. 

She was an exception. And you... well, you were the lesser of two evils for him. 

Jaebum’s eyes met yours a few times during the game, and you tried to look happy and cheer him on. You tried not to notice how Leena was touching him, how comfortably her body leaned into his, how she hugged him. How they jumped and cheered and laughed. You tried not to notice it.

But, when you did, you tried not to show how it bothered you. 

You liked him. You have liked Jaebum from the very first day.

And it only seems to get worse with every moment you spend with him. 

          ------------------------------------------------------------------

You stood in the kitchen with Jaebum beside you. He poured a glass of water for you, before getting a cola for himself. 

“It has to look like a drink or the guys would make me one, and it’ll be the end of it all if Yugyeom mixed it.” Jaebum laughed slightly, as he handed you a cup.

“They’re nice,” you commented, looking at the boys jumping to the music and singing along. Jaebum nodded, leaning on the counter, next to you. His shoulders brushed yours, causing your tummy to flip.

“They call you JB,” you commented again, peering up at him. “They don’t call you Jaebum.”

Jaebum smirked down at you as his dark eyes gazed into yours. 

Jaebum was different tonight. His eyes weren’t soft; the golden specks in them almost taken by darkness. His smiles weren’t light as they normally were; they seemed heavy and full with purpose. 

This Jaebum terrified you. 

“No one calls me Jaebum, y/n,” He said, as he leaned in closer, “They all call me JB.” 

Your heart sped up, and you dug your nails into your palm to calm yourself.

You called him Jaebum. 

“Except you,” Jaebum leaned down closer. His warm breath tickled your lips, making you tilt your head further to meet his gaze. You breath got caught in your throat, he leaned in closer, bringing his eyes to your level. “You call me whatever you want.”

“Jaebum,” you whispered trailing off unsure what to say. 

You could feel yourself burn brighter with every passing second. You were sure your cheeks were glowing in the dark at this point. You gulped and looked away from his heated gaze. 

Jaebum chuckled, a playful smirk dancing on his lips as he straightened. 

You looked at the cup in your hand in desperation, as you tried to calm your hammering heart. You didn’t know what was happening; all you knew was that your heart could no longer take this. 

As if one cue, someone came running towards you both. 

“Hey, care for a dance, m’lady?” Jinyoung bowed, humourfully. You turned to Jaebum who stared at Jinyoung unblinkingly. Leena appeared from behind Jinyoung, clinging onto Jaebum’s arm before whispering in his ear taking his attention away. 

You cast your gaze away once more before giving Jinyoung a tight smile. You turned back to Jaebum and met his eyes. He shrugged nonchantly, and you looked back to Jinyoung and his outstretched hand. 

You placed your hand in his, as you nodded. 

You felt Jaebum’s gaze follow you as you made your way to the makeshift dance floor and you tried to ignored it. You refused to look back and see him standing there with her as she stood close to him and whispered something into his ear.

You stood infront of Jinyoung, almost in the middle of the floor, when you realised that while you had agreed, you actually had no idea how to dance.

“I don’t know how to dance, Jinyoung,” you told him, your eyes wide in panic. Jinyoung chuckled, shaking his head. 

“I figured,” he said, before smiling at you kindly. “Give it a second.” 

As if on cue, the music changed from the pumping techno into a soft song. 

“Will you do me the honour?” Jinyoung opened his arms into position, making you laugh slightly. A few people moved away from the dancefloor, taking a break with the slow jam, but many others remained breaking into pairs. 

“Did you do this?” You asked stepping closer to him. He placed one hand on your waist, bringing your hand to his shoulder, before holding the other with his hand. 

He shrugged nonchantantly, failing to hold back a smile. “I figured you’d like this much better.” 

He swayed you with music, and you let him lead you. 

“How did you know I’d say yes?” You asked, lifting your gaze to meet his. 

His eyes were dark, almost black. They were so dark that it pulled you in closer, challenging you to lose yourself in them. 

“It was really a guess.” He replied, nervously. “If not, I would have been doing this alone.” 

You laughed at that, leaning your head forward. It slightly brushed on his chest, and you straightened up instantly. Jinyoung noticed but didn’t say anything and just smiled knowingly. 

You were thankful that you had disgarded your jacket already, because as the song neared to its end you could feel yourself begin to sweat. The song lulled to an end, and you moved away from Jinyoung. 

“Thank you for the dance,” you said softly, as you tucked your hair behind your ear. 

You walked to where Jaebum and Leena still remained. You felt your cheeks paint red as you noticed Jaebum’s gaze remain on you from the moment you turned away from Jinyoung and walked towards him. 

Your eyes met his dark ones, and you instantly looked away. You tucked your hair once more, not sure what to do. 

“How was the dance?” Leena giggled, wiggling her eyebrows at Jinyoung who just chuckled. You didn’t answer and just gave a small smile shyly. 

You kept your eyes low, as you felt Jaebum’s eyes remain on you. 

You felt your heart sink as he moved away from you, and moved closer towards Leena who got brighter. 

“So, how do you know eachother?” Leena asked, looking at Jaebum and you. 

“We’re just friends.” Jaebum replied curtly, making your heart sink further. 

You were just friends. Friends who were pretending to date at school. But they didn’t need to know that.

You nodded, keeping your eyes low. 

“Yeah, but how did you meet?” She asked, and you felt Jinyoung look at you both in interest. 

We met because I was getting bullied and Jaebum decided to help me by fake dating me. We both agreed because I liked him. 

“We’re in the same class,” Jaebum replied, coldly. 

Same class. That was it though. Was that all we were to him? 

This was the second person he had introduced you as.

Was that really all you were to him? 

Did all those nights eating together, taking care of Tuesday. Watching Twilight and doing everything else... it all didn’t matter. You were just class mate friends?

Leena seemed content with that answer, but Jinyoug must’ve noticed your discomfort. 

“Another dance?” he asked, lightly bumping his shoulder against yours. You looked up at him, in surpirse. 

“The song...” You tralied off, it was back to the fast tracks. Jinyoung shrugged, pouting slightly as he blinked. 

“We can dance however we want,” he took your hand. He smiled at you with such intensity that your cheeks flushed, “We make our own beat.” 

You let Jinyoung drag you to the dancefloor. This time you looked back at Jaebum. He stared at you, his eyes widening as his lips parted slightly. 

It looked like he was holding himself back, but for what, you didn’t know. He obiviously didn’t think much of you.

You casted your eyes away from him. 

You shouldn’t expect anything more from a friend. 

Jinyoung let go of you, as he turned to face you.

“Okay, follow my lead,” Jinyoung called over the music, has he held both your hands. “One. Two. Three, and jump! jump! jump!” 

You giggled as you both began jumping to the beat of the music. 

Jinyoung let go your hand, before making V’s with his hands and sliding them over his eyes. You copied him; doing all the cheesy moves he did making you laugh harder. 

“See who said you couldn’t dance!” Jinyoung cheered as he pulled you out of the crowd. “You were a natural!”

You laughed, before shaking your head. “I just had a great teacher!” 

You lightly pushed his shoulder, making him puff out his chest in as he nodded, making you giggle. 

When you reached the kitchen, you couldn’t find Jaebum. And then you realised you couldn’t find Leena either. You tried not to think about it; you tried to ignore it. 

But all the happy vibes you started evaporating from your body as you thought of Jaebum and her together. 

“Oh, y/n!” Yugyeom smiled at you, before handing you a cup. “Jaebum went to the bathroom.”

You thanked him, before bringing the cup to your lips. You coughed at the bitter taste burning down your throat.

“What is this?” You gasped looking at Yugyeom. 

“It’s my special mix,” he said a proud smile stretched on his face, slowly dissolving as he realising your condition. “Oh, I can make you another-”

“No. No, it’s okay,” You smiled at him, taking another sip. You tried to keep a smile on your face and hide the grimince and shiver of disgust running through you. “I just wasn’t expecting that.” 

You thought it’d be better to finish the drinking quickly so you gulped it all down in one go, making you frantically quivered as the horrid taste ran through your entire body. 

“Yo, what the hell,” Mark said looking at you, in horror. 

“I just had one of Yugyeom’s special drinks.” You told him, and instantly Mark’s face turned into one of sympathy. 

“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” he clicked his tongue as he shook his head. “That thing is 99% five different hard liqours, and 1% cola.” 

You laughed, before freezing, “Wait. Hard liqour?” 

“Yup, the worst party drink maker in history,” Mark laughed. “Unless, you’re going through something; then he’s the best.”

With that he walked away, and you looked at the empty cup in your hand. 

“Hey, Jinyoung,” you called, getting his attention. “You can’t get drunk from one cup right?” 

“Yeah, you shouldn’t. Unless you’re a newbie then you might get buzzed,” He looked at you, chuckling, his laugh increasing as he continued; “or unless you had Yugyeom’s special drinks. One cup of that and even we get fucked sometimes.”

“What if,” you squinted, feeling dread wash over you. “You’ve never drank before and had a cup of his special drink?”

Jinyoung looked at you, his eyes studying you. 

“Then you better have the alcohol tolerance of an alcoholic, or you’re absolutely fucked. Why?” 

“Nothing,” you said, not wanting to worry him. You blinked fast, trying not to be suspicious “I think I’m going to sit.”

Jinyoung squinted at you, leaning in closer. When you didn’t budge, he leaned back and nodded. “I’ll join you.”

You had been sitting for fifteen minutes and it wasn’t that bad. It wasn’t that bad at all. You didn’t feel anything, you felt normal; you felt good. 

Except you needed to pee. 

“Hey, where are the toilets?” You asked Jinyoung. You must’ve been louder than you thought because he covered the ear towards you before staring at you in shock. 

“Cleanest one is probably upstairs in Bambam’s room. Third room, on the left side.” 

You told him thanks and went off. 

The whole room was swaying, and you tried to ignore it.

Maybe if you didn’t acknowledge it, it’d go away. But that wasn’t happening. 

You held onto the railings of the stairs and heaved yourself upstairs. You counted the door, loudly, three times, and once you were sure you turned the knob. 

It was locked. 

You sighed as you left the urge to pee increase. 

You instantly tried the next door and it magically opened. And luckily it was the bathroom. 

You sighed loudly as you finally settled on the toilet seat and relieved yourself. You must’ve stayed there for longer than you thought because you heard someone knock loudly on the door. 

“Sorry! Just a minute.” You called out, before getting dress and washing your hands. 

You turned towards the door, opening it, and then you froze. 

You must’ve opened the wrong door, because this didn’t lead to the hallway. 

This door led to the bedroom. 

A bedroom with a bed, where Leena was on top of Jaebum straddling him. Her hands holding his over his hands, and her lips on his. 

Jaebum’s eyes snapped to yours, and he instantly pushed her off. You saw him sit up, before getting up towards you. 

You closed the door, locking it. 

“Fucking bitch!” The other person called from the other door, before they walked off.

“Sorry,” you whispered, as you heart stopped beating. You slid to the floor, as your whole body felt numb. 

A tear fell from your eyes, and then another. 

“Y/n,” Jaebum called out, as he knocked on the door.

You didn’t answer. You stayed like that; your tears silently falling down your cheeks. A sob threatened to escape, and you covered your mouth with your hand. You cried into your hands, you sobs drowning in tightly pressed palms and the loud bass of the house. 

          ------------------------------------------------------------------

You didn’t know how long you were in the bathroom, but you knew it was longer than you had thought. 

You sighed as you caught your reflection in the mirror. Your cheeks and eyes were red and puffy; there was no denying you had a full down meltdown at a party. 

You stared into your eyes, and felt another wave of sobs coming. You pushed it back, as you smiled through the tears that fell. 

Jaebum was kissing her. He was probably doing more than that with her. 

There are exceptions. 

She was his exception; she was the one he went back to. And you, you were a pity, a chairty. 

He enjoyed his kiss with her; remembered all of them. 

Jaebum can kiss another person so easily. Jaebum has kissed so many others as easily. 

He had kissed you too. 

But it was nothing like how he kissed her. He never told her it was a mistake, and to forget it. But he had told you. 

Your kiss meant nothing. It was only you. 

It was only you who always put more meaning into things. It was you who considered the kiss you shared with Jaebum more. The moments you shared with Jaebum; eating, Tuesday, cooking... It was all you. 

This was a mistake. Maybe coming here was a mistake too. Maybe you were overstepping your boundaries.

You walked to sofa where Jaebum was sitting with the boys. 

Jinyoung spotted you first, his face merging from one of happiness to concern. 

“Y/n,” he gasped. 

Jaebum snapped his head towards you. He sat on the edge of his sit. No cup in his hand, no Leena beside him anymore. His eyes widened. his lips slightly gasping before it grew into a tight smile. 

Coming here was a mistake. He looked annoyed. He looked upset. You were only in his way of fun. You probably spolied his time with Leena too. And now you’re spoiling the remainder of his night with your post-meltdown face. 

“Damn, that drink must have fucked you up,” Jinyoung chuckled, but his voice still filled with concern. “Are you okay? Did you vomit alot?”

You nodded, as you leaned down and grabbed your jacket. You wished the room would spinning now. You wished you could stand straighter. You wished you hadn’t seen Jaebum kissing another girl. You wished you didn’t love him. 

“I think I’ll go home now,” you told the group, as you gave them a wave. You refused to look at Jaebum, even though you could feel his eyes remain on you, unmoving. 

You turned and began walking away before they could say anything. You staggered to the side slightly, but luckily didn’t fall over. You kept walking, picking up speed, until you were running out of the house and onto the pavement of the street. 

You turned the corner before you fell on your knees. You welcomed the sting of the pavement scraping your knees. You dug your palm into your eyes as you cried. Your throat hurt, your lungs burned and your heart clenched as you thought of Jaebum. 

The world kept spinning; this time slower but it worse this way. 

You cried as you thought of Jaebum. You cried for you heart. You cried because of how stupid and delusional you’ve been. You cried as the world around you faded into nothing, and it was just you, your aching heart, floating spinningly through the darkness. 

“Hey,” you knew it was him. You didn’t look up, you kept sitting like that. Maybe he’ll go away if you pretended like he wasn’t there. 

But that didn’t work at all the entire night, and once again, it failed to work. 

Jaebum settled down infront of you. He didn’t say anything, but you could feel him in front you. 

What was he doing here? 

You didn’t want anymore of his pity. 

“What are you doing here? Like this?” Jaebum asked softly. 

I’m crying because you don’t love me. I’m crying because you’ll never love me. I’m crying because my heart is breaking into a million pieces and you don’t even know. 

I’m crying because I love you. 

“I’m waiting for my uber,” you told him, your voice thick with emotion and smushed by your hand. 

“Yeah, that’s a good idea,” Jaebum told you, making you frown harder, as more tears fells from your eyes. 

“There’s no way I could drive the bike with you like this.”

Like this. Like what?

“You should go back to the party,” you told him, but you wanted him to stay.

He didn’t leave. 

He didn’t leave, instead he moved closer to you and bought your head to his chest. 

“I’m sorry, y/n,” Jaebum whispered softly. 

You cried harder, making your whole body shake. You felt Jaebum’s shirt soak with your tears, but you didn’t move away. 

You stayed there. 

And he stayed there, wrapping his arms around you. 

He didn’t leave. He stayed there even when an uber didn’t come after an hour. 

And then one showed up, and you both got in. You didn’t look at him for the rest of the night. You just kept crying. 

But Jaebum couldn’t look away. He kept his eyes on you, unable to look away. He kept you close until you closed the door of your apartment. Your hair covering your face, your eyes low and tears falling down. 

He stayed until the sun greeted the moon. He stayed until he heard your mother get ready to leave for work, and open the door. He stayed even when she looked into the apartment and told him you had just fell asleep. 

Jaebum couldn’t move. He was stuck.

[antigoneidk]

One last time|t.h.

a/n: seriously this was a random idea i had at 2 am in the morning.

(edit: how the heck you guys were reading this this entire time? i can believe that someone is able to make SO many mistakes like me. all i can say is thank from the bottom of my heart)

warning:fluff,angst

The day was shining and the birds were singing. The sky was blue, peaceful,making you feel like a whole new person. You wanted to get out,filling your lungs with fresh air,celebrating every moment with the love of your life.

Your boyfriend.

He was sleeping on the other side of the room. His wavy hair coming down to his face. Closed eyes and a slightly open mouth. His hands were hugging the pillow near him. His breathing was slow,heavy. The lighting in the room made him look like a angel.

Well he was a angel. A kind person, always there for you and his loved ones. A funny boy, making you laugh whenever you're feeling down. Silly and cute at the same time. Your fears were terrified of him, ‘cause he was the only one that could make them disappear.

You were in love and you couldn't deny it.

You smiled as you were approaching him and sat down next to him with this stupid smile still on your face. You ran your fingers through his hair and pulled some of them behind so that you can admire his beauty.

He was no longer asleep. He opened his eyes slowly and looked at you staring at him as you grabbed his face with your hands and leaned to him.

"Good morning"you said and kissed him on the cheek.

"Good morning love" he said back, his voice deeper than usual.“Can you please wake me up like this every day?"he added and looked at you with his still sleepy face.

You looked at him weirdly.

"What did I do?"you laughed.

"Staring out your window and then at me with this beautiful smile on your pretty face. I love that"his heavy morning voice made your heart beat faster. He leaned towards,grabbing your cheek and leaving you a soft kiss on your lips.

This. Your favourite. Your entire being melting at his touch and falling in love with him even more.

“Do you wanna get out? I mean the weather is perfect outside. We can go eat something and then go for a walk in the park. If you want to or else we can stay home and I can make you som-"

"I want to" he stopped you. He liked it when you were talking so fast like this every time you would suggest something to do together. He knew deep down that you cared for him, and time like these his heart flattered.

"Okay then. Get dressed and we're leaving"

---

The air was hitting your face. You breathed clean and fresh air. You were looking out the window like a little kid,happy, excited to discover anything new. You knew the road very well, every inch of it, but it felt like the mother nature would do something, that would drive you insane.

Tom was amazed by your beauty. Your hair,your face,the way you placed your hand out the window, the expressions you made through out the entire road.He knew he made the right decision. He was in love with you. He loved you. Every single piece of you, from the way you talked to the way you remained silent when a situation was bothering you, or how you had the power to control your emotions when there were people around, or even how you turned red whenever you felt embarrassed and smiled shyly. For him you weren’t the girl next door but a creature to pure for this world. 

He parked in front of a little coffee shop. There were 2 little tables in front of it with plants decorating it. You already had the taste of the croissant and the coffee in your mouth, your inside getting excited with the idea of food, but as you tried to get out of the car a hand stopped you.

"I suggest taking something and go to the beach for a walk. Huh?"he smiled as he raised his eyebrows, waiting for your reply.

"That is an wonderful idea baby. Yes let's do that" you clapped your hands and looked at him with a smile, closing your eyes for a moment and placing your hands to your face giggling.

"Okay stay here. I want this day to be perfect just for you" he said making you curious. 

"I'm an independent woman. I can do this" you said pulled your hair back from your shoulders.

"I know pretty girl but let me do this okay? I want this day to be perfect for you"he kissed you as he opened the door making his way inside the store laughing just like you did. He was being such a lovely man for you.

---

"This croissant is just perfection. Like,hmm,the chocolate and-oh my God I can't even put it into words. This is heaven and I'm not accepting other opinions" you said, letting your thoughts out loud in front of your boyfriend. You weren't thinking, just enjoying your food.

The guy next to you started laughing. This noises of his laughter and the way his eyes closed a little making him even more attractive to your eyes. No, this was perfection but you played along.

"No I disagree. Look at my face. This is perfection darling. Ohh yes" he placed his hands over his face,posing in front of an imaginary camera acting like the supermodel he was.

"Hands on the wheel sir"you demanded dying from laughter. His goofy expressions, even though he was trying to be a 'proper model' were funny to you.He placed his hands back on the wheel making fun of himself and how stupid he was, but you shut him off by kissing his cheek.

You connected your phone and opened a playlist. You two had time to get to the beach he wanted to so what a better way to enjoy this little trip than jamming to some songs?

Knights of Cyndonia came. This was your favourite song. The rhythm,the lyrics,the voices.

“No one's going to take me alive.Time has come to make things right. You and I must fight for our rights.You and I must fight to survive” you were dancing now to the beat of the drums ,screaming these words to each other and forget about everything else.

Your problems, fears, everything that could ruin this moment was no longer in your mind. You always had that problem of thinking about other things, distracting you from the present. That was something you didn't liked about yourself and tried to change.

But now you were dancing and singing,well actually yelling, full of happiness and joy. Little tears came down your face but you were quick enough to stopped them before him noticing it. You kissed your man on the cheek once more and kept acting like a foolish kid,not giving a damn about the rest of the world.

Tom was feeling the same way. His attention was all yours, enjoying every second as much as possible, but he knew that the two of you were about to have moments even better than that.

But the universe didn't give a damn about you either or your happiness in this car, but it was ready to destroy this wonderful moment. 

A car from the opposite lane came to your way.

None of you noticed anything,even thought the other car tried to warn you. You were paying attention to each other. You looked at him as he looked at you smiling and laughing like a little kid.

You were a fool for this boy.

His hair brushed all the way back, his black t-shirt around his upper body and his strong muscular hands that when they were around you, you knew you were safe. As you kept looking at them you remembered the first time he ever hugged you. A moment you could never forget and the feelings you got. Or how his eyes met yours before his lips touched your soft ones.

That was the last thing you got to your mind before black.

---

"My little girl, my child, I love you. Please come back to me little angel. You have so much more to discover and see from this world. We missed your soft voice and your cute laugh. Oh dear God, why are you doing this to us? Please, I'm begging you, bring this little angel back to us. I love you baby. I love you so much. Please be strong and fight, I know you can"

Those were the first words you heard. Your head was hurting. You felt weak,alone,hopeless. You tried to open your eyes, trying to figure out what was happening, but the room was spinning making it even harder for you.

The first thing you saw was your mum and dad sitting next to you holding each others hands and yours too keeping it warm.

"Mum?Dad?" you whispered, to weak for anything else.

"Baby? Oh my God? My little girl" your mum said and left her tears all the way down to her face. She hugged you left a kiss on your forehead.

Your dad left the room running.

"How are you feeling? Are you okay? Are you tired? Do you want some water?" she sounded worried as she kept asking questions you did not have answers to. Your head started hurting even more trying to understand what was happening and why you were in a bed and not at the beach you were supposed to be.

"Its okay darling. It's okay I'll explain later okay?" she kissed your forehead once again, seeing you confused looking around at the room. Your dad got inside and ran to you, with a smile on his face that you were back to him. Soon an old man showed up and both of your parents step aside.

A doctor.

"What is happening here? Someone explain. Please" you begged your mum for answers but your powers faded away as soon as your words left your mouth and you just went back to sleep, even though you had been in a coma for 1 and a half week.

---

"Mummy? Are you here?" you said as your eyes were still shut. Your pain wasn’t as bad, but still you felt exhausted, fatigue. This was the worst you had been since forever, sick without even knowing why. Is this your fault or somebody else caused it? How you got there? How your loved ones found out? 

"Shh.Im here now" she whispered as she was touching your hair looking at you the way moms do. With love you can’t have from another person in the whole world. You opened your eyes facing her and the white wall behind her body.

"Please explain to me. What is happening?" you begged and tears fell from your eyes. You couldn't help but cry from the pain and the confusion you were dragged to.

"You have to rest first and then we'll talk I promise"

"No mum. I wanna know  so please do me a favor and talk to me" you tried moving your hand but the pain became worse.

You looked at your body. Your mum was seeing bruises all over you face this entire time.Your right hand was  broken and scars decorated your legs all over. A white robe covered your whole body and you were sure underneath were also bruises or even stiches.

"You were in the car with Tom when a car crushed with yours. The other driver claims that he tried to warn you but you didn’t listened as it seems. So now you're here. You've been in a come for almost 2 weeks. You scared me baby. Please promise me you'll never do this again"

From all this the only thing that was in your head was Tom.

Where was he? How he was feeling? Maybe he was better than you.

You couldn’t think of the other scenario.

"How is Tom?Where is he? I wanna talk to him" you said and tried to stand but you collapsed back down.

"He is fine. Trust me he is, just stay here and relax, you can’t leave now"

"No I don’t believe you mum. You're lying! I know you do! Just let me talk to him. Or even see him. I want to make sure he is okay" you tried to scream a little with the hope of scaring her a little just so she can help you get to him.

"No honey I told you. First of all you can't even get up. He is okay baby, but please stau where you are" she wasn't longer looking at you. This was a sign that she was lying. She always did that, cause she was a person that never lied.

"NO!MUM JUST LET ME GO"you were crying now, your pain not only physically but mentally too. Your anger started to built up really fast, not only with yourself for not knowing it sooner, but from the fear that might something bad had happened to him.

You managed to stand up. Your mum was watching full of terror, that she even tried to stop you by grabbing your shoulders and pulling you back, but your anger was huge that it gave you the strength to stay still.

You were now through hallways trying to figure out where might his bed be. As you were searching you fell down on your knees. Your mum ran behind you and trying to get you up with a help from a doctor that just got out from a room.

You asked the doctor for his room with tears in your eyes, but also hope. You were breathing really hard and your body was exhausted from the walk you took,even for these 20 steps. It was a lot for you to handle.

"I'm sorry miss, but this young man passed away few days ago"

Those weren’t the words you expected.

This young man passed away

So that was it? You would never see his face again? His eyes, his smile? You would never hear him talk to you, or laugh, or whisper to you when you would need to? You would never ran to his arms just so you can feel him, or comfort him, or sleep knowing that you are secure?

Your heart was broken into billion pieces. The only thing that was left from him was memories, some clothes at your apartment, his smell on your sheets and the ghost of him following you for the rest of your life. You wished you were in his position. He had so much to do in this world, to share, to create. 

That last memory of him in the car was repeating in your head. You never got the chance to say goodbye properly.You had been in a coma, not by his side to hold his hand, whisper to him, telling him how much you loved him. But you also didn’t have the chance to share one more kiss. Make love one more time. Hug each other one more time. Hear him one last time.

--------------------

Stay home and stay safe:) *gif is not mine*

[defenderrosetyler]

Words in the Office

For: @anyfandomgoesbingo​ Square Filled: Office CEO WC:  1724 Show/Pair: Rose Tyler and the 10th Doctor from Doctor Who No Beta “Rose Tyler, you are not going out like that!” Jackie Tyler scolds her daughter. This caused the young woman to huff as she grabbed her three-inch high heels. She knew she should have changed her outfit in the TARDIS. It would have saved her from this particular conversation with her Mum.

 “Mum, it’s nothing major and I don’t look all that bad,” Rose says pinning her hair back from the curls she’d just spent at least an hour on. “Besides, no one will be looking at my bum anyway, it’s mainly for research.” She attempts to lie biting her lower lip. This sent Jackie into a whole rant about how she’d changed ever since she met the Doctor only three years ago. That particular meeting saved her life and made Rose realize what she wanted, besides being a girl in the Henricks shop folding clothes all day. Of course, the Doctor had regenerated since she’d first met him, but that didn’t mean she loved him, and his two hearts, any less. The Doctor was a Time Lord from the planet Gallifrey. When the two met, he’d saved her life from plastic window shop dummies that were destined to attack all of London. Since then, they’d shared many adventures. Rose even got to officially meet her Dad, even if she’d mistakenly caused a paradox. 

This time the Doctor, the 10th incarnation to be precise had noticed some strange readings in a nearby office space. Hence the reason why Rose had dressed up for this particular outing. She was showing as a Health and Safety officer, distracting others so the Doctor could come in and see what type of alien was threatening the earth this time. Having finally escaped her Mum, Rose sighed approaching the blue police box that was the TARIDS. The Time and Relative Dimensions in Space box. Made of Gallifrayen tech, bigger on the inside than its outside. Using her silver TARDIS key, Rose entered inside. Heels click-clacking on the grates. “Doctor? We’re gonna be late for my appointment!” The blonde called standing by the console. Echoing in the halls, the clank of the Doctor’s sneakers echoed. His eyes glanced over her figure. Rose had chosen a subtle blue dress that hugged her body and seemed to make her look more beautiful than the normal ‘Pink and Yellow’ human he’d nicknamed her. Seeing her in this outfit, reminded him of the first time his previous face looked at her before they met Charles Dickens. Or, on most recent adventures, of how she looked in a roman toga dealing with the goddess Fortuna. “Wow….You look stunning,” he says, stammering a bit. Normally the Doctor liked to ramble, but when it came to one Rose Tyler, she took his breath away. “Ya know I still don’t like the idea of you posing for something again, you know what happened last time. Had you and me both turned into stone.” He reminds her gently. 

Rose rolled her eyes just like Jackie. “I’m not dealing with a stone carver now am I?” She teased, giving him her usual teasing tongue through her teeth smile. Arriving at the artist’s photo studio, Rose made her way inside to wait for her photo session. The Doctor was busy using his sonic screwdriver to make his way past locked doors. There was something here, he just didn’t know what yet. Something was wrong, but he wasn’t able to figure out what. As the Doctor explored the office, Rose stood with the photographer when a certain stench had filled the air. “Do you smell that?” She asks one of the other models. 

The redhead brushed it off as if it was nothing. “No worse than my husband’s cologne,” she replied in a Scottish accent. 

Rose rolled her eyes and tried to focus on the photographer. The Doctor in the meantime was trying to figure out what this alien was. The creature he’d faced was bothering him, that nagging feeling of knowing something before but couldn’t put his finger on it. As his luck would have it, he and Rose were not the only ones working on this. Kate Stewart. Daughter of the Doctor’s dear friend the brigadier, now head of UNIT, the unified task force, had caught wind of this. One of her officers had reported the sighting of the TARDIS to her. Her father always made sure to have the number to the TARDIS in her phone in case he was ever needed, or in the event of his passing, the Doctor would be the first to know. She dialed him, but there was no answer as he wasn’t in the TARDIS. Blast. How was she supposed to tell him the Zygons were back? Having a gut feeling of what was possibly occurring, The Doctor had grabbed the machine he’d invented when it goes *Ding* there was an alien nearby. Needless to say, it never had a name, just called ‘the machine that goes ding. As he neared the set of the photoshoot, his machine started chiming like a bell. “Oh no….” he whispered. He finally realized what they were dealing with. “Zygons, Rose is surrounded by Zygons!” As he’d figured it out, the red creatures appeared, ready to take Rose as their next victim. “Oi! You lot!” The Doctor called, popping out of his hiding spot. “I don’t think you want to mess with her.”

“Doctor….We meet again.” The Zygon hissed. This made Rose puzzled She’d never met them before. Was this another part of his past she didn’t know? Like Sarah Jane.

“Yes, but it’s just me this time, but I’m still going to have to ask you to leave.” He says politely as possible, even if the Oncoming Storm was boiling underneath whenever Rose was in danger. The Zygon’s threatened Rose with a snarl, but seeing the storm underneath, they seemed to cooperate and back off. “This planet is defended remember, and I will stop you. Even if I’m not wearing this face, you will cooperate.” The brown-haired man issued as a threat just like he had when he’d first regenerated and lost his hand. With the matter of the Zygons settled, the duo of timelord and human returned to the TARDIS, Rose having ditched her high heels to be more comfortable. As they relaxed in the console room, Rose bit her lower lip. “You met those creatures before, but never told me. Why?” She questions filling the empty space of the room. The Doctor who had set them off for a random location wondering where they’d end up this time and looked at the human confused. “I’m sorry?” he blinked. Her expression repeated the question without her needing to ask a second time. This made the Doctor sigh and pinch the spot between his eyes on the bridge of his nose. “If you say wibbly wobbly timey wimey your down for a smack.” Rose teased interrupting as he seemed deep in thought. The Time Lords dual hearts hammered in his chest. What was she trying to get at? “Rose, I’ve had a lot of adventures before we met. You know that. I mean, you did meet Sarah Jane after all.” He reminds. “What were you going to tell me that day on the street? When you said you’d never forget me?”Rassilon damned she went there. This made him let out a long sigh. Shoving his hands in his pockets as he usually did when he was nervous to talk about something. “Does it really need saying, Rose?” His words filled the tense air, you could hear a pin drop if one listened close enough. The Time Lord let out a breath, shaking his head. “Rose….” he whispered. The girl in front of him meant so much to him. Hadn’t his actions told her how his hearts felt for her?

“Its just three little words. Why can’t you say them?”

“As I told you before, as a Time Lord I don’t age. I’ve seen so many people live and die. People I care about, people who mean the whole universe to me. But you, Rose Tyler are something special. You’ve saved me on more than one occasion. Shouldn’t actions speak louder than words?”

“But sometimes we want to hear them. We want to hear how one person feels about the other.” Rose argues.  “You and Mickey do that? Tell each other how you feel?” He tossed back. Rose was growing irritated with him now. Why was the Doctor always this stubborn? Crossing her arms over her chest, she glared.  “I’ve known Mickey when I was a kid. Or did you forget that when we went and saw Dad? I did love Mickey, and we tried dating but I kept seeing him as my brother, with you it’s different. It’s why I looked into the TARDIS that day when I saved your life. Or have you forgotten I did that too” She says, anger dying down to a soft whisper. 

Hearing her explanation, the Doctor felt his hearts breaking. Of course he remembered her saving his life on that platform. Nearly burning out her brain to do it, causing him to regenerate from the previous face he had to this current one. “Come here,” he whispered and reached into his pocket. “I’ve been wanting to give this to you but never knew when to.” Rose looked at the box he was holding. A small velvet box inside was a heart-shaped necklace. The design held in the middle was that of a pink rose surrounded by gold. The Time Lord cleared his throat seeing her in awe of the jewelry he’d just given her. “Open it up.” He says gently. Inside was a picture of the two of them on their first Christmas together at Jackie’s.

“Got that from one Fanny Price,” he explained. “The-The necklace. The photo was from your Mum.” Rose hugged the taller man tightly. Pressing a kiss to his cheek. “Doctor I love it.” She exclaims, tears falling down her cheeks. On the other side, were three little words, engraved in silver so they could be seen against the gold. Rose waited, looking up at him with her hazel eyes, which looked green most times. Holding her breath, allowing him to say the three little words she’d been waiting to hear.  “Rose Tyler, I love you”

[aw-eather]

Heather Watches SG1 s7ep13: Grace

Hello friends! I asked on twitter which one you wanted to see next and this was the one so.. I genuinely really enjoy this episode but I don’t think it would be top five? The Kiss TM obviously is up there but its so... sad.. BUT I think its a beautifully shot episode and the director is wonderful. Also if I ever meet Damien Kindler, I have a list of questions. 

I watched this a few weeks ago but am posting it today (11/085/2020) because I forgot I had even typed the notes until the other night when i asked. 

As always, I swear quite a bit but I also cried quite a lot in this episode becuse well I’m a hopeless romantic, I love Space Dad and I had just been dumped so all the angst hurts haha

also also, I leave most if not all my typos in here because I think it makes it funnier and I don’t usually look at my keyboard when I type so I make mistakes. I’m not perfect at touch typing by any standard and I still don’t do it properly anyway. 

Previously on which I don’t need because I’ve seen this show soooo many times 

Fucking Ronson man

Mum says she’s prepared but she’s not

Thers a storm coming and she doesn’t know how bad its gonna be

Two hours top turns into 4 days, 

HER FUCKING GRIN OH MY GOD

Remember your mission, bitch this is Samantha Carter, she forgets nothing and always stick to the mission plan (see The First Commandment, etc. etc.)

Uh oh

Not a ship on its way

I wonder who or what is on it. Well we never find out so no point asking

CREDITS

I am trying to eat and type at the same time this will  not go well

END CREDITS

Love that black curtain with tiny lights they’re using for stars

Cute ship, foe

Of course you wanna talk to them, Ronson but I don’t think its gonna go well babe

Powering up weapons but you won’t get awwwwaaaaayyyyy

Straight into the unknown not-quite-nebula 

SAM NO

WHAT A BAD FUCKING IDEA

WHAT ARE YOU DOING

DAMIAN KINDLER

And BAM baby hit her head

Silence

More silence 

Fucking creepy kid

But if you wanna feel old she’s married and has a kid on the way

You are alone my love

Poor Sam

Of course you do hun cause you’re a good solider 

The didn’t leave you alone honey, they were beamed out

Cuts gone 

Just saying 

Poor Sam

She’s all alone and nothings working and I just wanna hug her

Teal’c being a sweetie 

Being the voice of reason

Stopping her from dying 

“If you sleep, you will die” *Sam falls asleep*

FUCKING KID GIVING ME THE CREEPS

Sam: Is someone there?

Me: IDK Are they? 

Cuts back 

Smart girl <3 

We don’t wanna play with you, you scare us

Cuts gone

“Were you this annoying when you were ascended?”

“Depends who you ask”

The answer is yes, Sam

He is always that annoying 

Her subconscious brain is trying to provide her people to bounce her ideas off of

This is the part of her that wants to explore the cloud, the scientist that battles with the military side of her

Beautiful shot of him standing behind her

Uh oh the ships making noises 

Peter Woste (director) makes some really beautiful shots

Ooooh 

This hurts

Daniel has no idea how lost Jack is

Of course he heard, ya bloody dick head

Jack is so worried about his girl

“Tok’ra can’t send a ship” no they ever can

What is the point of an alliance if only one side ever does anything? 

Is this the first time Daniel is realising Jack’s feelings for Sam? 

Because he seems shocked at Jack’s anger/frustration

THIS FUCKING KID

TEAL’C

He calls her Samantha which he NEVER calls her its…. An interesting choice

He’s right, everything is not as it seems 

Sam thinking of other ideas that she would normally bounce off her boys so she’s bouncing it off… subconscious images of her boys 

And she passed out again

Poor babe :(

Awwww I wanna hug her and protect her 

Honestly I think this way would have worked if it weren’t for that FUCKING KID

She’s not real Sam! 

Who is this kid anyway? 

Alien? Gas cloud?

Her face at the idea of it being a sentient cloud 

“Because its corrosive?” LOL

And shes out again

Did she?? Interesting

 Yeah but actually talking would have helped kid

Ooooooh no

Dad’s about to be here 

I’m Grace… https://youtu.be/688OPQ9WFpA

Hold on while I cry

HES NOT TALKING ABOUT JACK SAMANTHA 

HE WANTS YOU TO BE WITH JACK YA BLOODY GOOSE

DON’T BE AN IDIOT

Oh an initial trace huh? 

Useless fucking shits

They all know he loves her

Its written on their faces

And he’s been doing such a good job of holding it in, damnit

That little look down

A brother to Teal’c awww 

JACK HE JUST TOLD YOU SAM STILL LOVES YOU 

AND YOU LET HER GET ENGAGED TO PETE IM A CREEP SHANAHAN 

WHY YOU DO THE THING AT THE END OF THE EPISODE 

Oh NO NOT THE BUBBLES 

Baby Sam wondering how a bubble can exist 

Adorable 

I’m gonna cry again

Interesting that jack is in street clothes not uniform 

Because this is how she pictures him

Samantha 

I’m crying at this conversation

I could write out everything they say And what it all means because it all HURTS but we all know it off by heart I’m too lazy to rehash it here

I HAD TO HOLD IN A SCREAM

THE KISS AND LETTING HIM GO (she never really did tho let’s not kid ourselves) AND OH MY GOD IT HURTS

THIS FUCKING KID

Bubbles

Dead ass tho i nearly threw something during Sam and Jacks scene 

And whats worse is when she’s back, he would have sat there the entire time until she woke up

And the fear of anybody else hearing her call him Jack

And making an assumption that they’re together and therefore ruining her career 

Makes him shut her down and then she really knows that she has to move on

Because she doesn’t know how scared he was when she was missing

And that he was just as scared as she was when he was gone

But she’ll never know that 

Because he’ll never tell her 

I’m crying again

The way he looks at her

And says shes fine and says you are 

And her sad look

I fucking can’t handle it y’all

I just want them both to be happy and with each other but they’re too emotionally inept to say anything to each other so this is what we have to deal with

And now I have to deal with PETE 

FUCKING PETE 

Final Thoughts: 

I literally cried three times in that episode. Normally its once with Jacob’s scene but this time it was every time Jack was there too. I think my recent breakup is making me soft and all I can handle right now is fluff. Anything else hurts. 

I love that episode with my entire being but fuck me does it hurt

Also who or what is Grace? I have SO many questions. 

Its a beautifully shot episode though

And Amanda’s acting is ace. So is RDAs. 

BUT FUCK MGM FOR NEVER LETTING US HAVE CONFIRMATION OUTSIDE OF ONE PICTURE AND A PASSWORD

[mollyhw14]

Fallen Angel : Tied to the Devil's Daughter (demon au Lee Donghyuk / Haechan ) ♛ CH2♛

Seraphina was beyond livid.

She'd come to the dance studio to let off steam but it felt like the complete opposite. Putting on some music, she decided to let loose and see if dancing would at least loosen her temper a little bit.

Stretching to warm up, she slowly began to let her body flow with the rhythm, eventually flowing into the choreography she'd been practicing for the last week. Flawlessly, she completed every step, finishing with a grande jete and her final pose. Once the music stopped she collapsed to the floor, sweating but feeling more alive from the buzz of the dance. Prying herself from the floor, she heard distant clapping from the door way making her whip her head round fast to see who had interrupted her alone time.

Phina was definitely not impressed to see the boy she had glared at previously before for taking over her time slot.

"Wow princess didn't know you were quite the ballet dancer. I must say, doesn't really fit your temper like but you got some moves." His voice was almost teasing-like and this irritated Seraphina a lot. Getting annoyed by his presence, she scowled at him, waiting for his explanation as to why he was even there. Not getting an answer she took matters into her own hands.

"So you gonna tell me why the fuck you're here or am I gonna have to slap some sense in to you?"

He chuckled at her tone, she sounded pissed and it only amused him.

"Now now, sunshine, that's no way to speak to people is it?" He made sure to drag out the word sunshine just to piss her off even more.

"You call me that again and I'll snap your fucking neck!" She'd moved to grab her phone, getting angrier the more she was in his presence.

"Feisty one aren't you? Princess, as much as I'd love to break your neck too, don't think it would go down to well with the police now would it?" His condescending tone irritated her and she stormed out, barging past his tall ass to find her next class.

"By the way, I came to take over my time slot, not that I didn't mind you staring at me Sunshine," he shouted from behind her.

'Staring? Fucking idiot, he's obviously blind to not see I was trying to burn him with my eyes' she thought to herself as she slowed down once entering her classroom. 

Maths was Seraphina's most hated class. It wasn't because she wasn't good at it, if anything she was top of the class. However, she unfortunately had to share this class with the demons in the year above. Three of them being the dicktrio who thought they ran the school. Their dumbasses had dropped a grade and now she had to have this class with them. Not only that, her teacher was a demon too, favouring them more amongst the humans within the class, no matter how dumb they were. Phina often wondered to herself if there was many more teachers who were also demons, and they just kept to their human form?

Waiting for the teacher to come, she glanced around, trying to not make contact with the black orbs that almost laughed at her from across the room. The demons giggled to themselves, knowing how much humans hated eye contact with them, believing they would die from a single look. However this wasn't the case for Phina, she was introverted, and this was why she hated eye contact. She didn't give one shit if this girl was a demon, she just knew the moment they shared eye contact, she wouldn't hear the end of it.

"How's my favourite person!" Phina heard the angelic voice of her friend, before being engulfed by a pair of arms.

"Cheonie, you're strangling me!" Phina managed to choke out before her best friend finally sat in the seat next to her.

"Can I not be happy to see my best friend? Have you calmed down yet?"

Before Phina could reply, she heard the high pitch voice shout out from the other side of the room.

"Shut up Chansa, you might as well be an Angel you're that fucking annoying!"

Hurt flashed across her friends face and Seraphina saw red. How dare she insult her best friend.

"First of all her name is CHEONSA, get it right bitch! Maybe mind your own fucking god damn business before insulting my friend. At least she has a heart unlike you whores."

She glared straight into the black pits of hell, and everyone around them muted. All shocked that not only had she stuck up to the three dicktrio demons, but also because she actually looked them straight in the eye.

Shock was evident on the demons’ faces, but was gone as quick as it came.

"Did you just call us whores?"

"Yes and what the fuck are you going to do about it?"

"You're dead human bitch-"

Just as the girl was about the pounce at Phina, the door swung open to reveal both the teacher and the person she hated just as much as the dicktrio. Lee Haechan.

"What are you doing Seraphina! Get in your seat right this instant and don't utter a single word for the rest of class." Black orbs glowed from the door way at her, stopping the demon in her tracks.

Seraphina was beyond mad. Not only had she been humiliated by the teacher, but that the demons always got their own way. The smirk on their faces showing everyone who had the higher ground.

"Utter bullshit" she mumbled to herself, Cheonsa gave her a reassuring smile.

"Right class we have a new student joining us, Lee Haechan. Make him feel welcome and please, no funny business. Haechan please take a seat next to Seraphina."

Could Phina's day get any worse? Banging her head on her desk, she heard a low chuckle followed by, "You really are a badass aren't you Sunshine? Going against a demon you're definitely asking for a death wish."

Oh how she wished she was dead.

The bell rang signally the end of the day, and nobody was more exciting to be leaving school that Seraphina. The ringing of the bell actually made her smile for the first time that day, as she skipped down the stairs to go meet her best friend outside.

Finding Cheonsa under the school's apple tree, they linked arms before heading off the their usual cafe down the road.

"Why don't you ask Mark if he wants to join us, you said he's been stressed out with exams recently he'll need a break." Cheonsa looked at her friend for an answer, watching as she frowned at the mention of her brother.

"I know, he really stresses himself out too much, mums had to put a lock on the fridge because he's been stress eating."

Mark was Seraphina's older brother, who never let her forget that he was the older ones. He was doing his finally exams to get himself into college, and the boy literally stressed himself out so much over it, he would lash out at anybody who distracted him.

"Do you think he'll be calm enough to even talk to me on the phone?"

Cheonsa hesitated,

"He should be done with them soon, he'd probably appreciate his sister inviting him out."

With that said, Phina brought the phone to her ear to call her brother, entering the all too familiar cafe.

"Yah what do you want I'm busy Phi!"

Phina closed her eyes at the loudness of his voice, knowing her brother would react this way she sighed.

"Never mind. I was going to ask if you'd like to come hang out with us at the cafe but if you're busy just leave it." She snapped at him down the phone, her temper getting the better of her.

"No wait!" the voice on the other side made her jump. He really needed to stop shouting.

"I'll come, I'm sorry for shouting I need a break these exams are driving me fucking insane." His voice was more softer this time, regretting the way he'd spoke to his sister. After all, she was just trying to be nice.

"I'll see you in 5."

Just as the phone line went dead, Cheonsa was walking over with two cups in her hand.

"You know me to well Cheonsie, a peppermint hot chocolate is always the way to my heart."

They both chuckled and sat in their usual spot, before Phia decided to fill her friend in on the new kid.

"Honestly you should've seen him Cheonsa, he thought he was fucking amazing, interrupting my dance slot-"

"Hello to my favourite sibling!" Her brother practically screamed from across the cafe, interrupting her rant.

"Mark I'm your only sibling."

"I know that but still... anyway I brought Renjun because he was with me when you called." Renjun stuck his head out from behind Mark, waving at the two girls.

"Hey Rejun, how've you been?" Cheonsa beamed up at the blonde, eyes never leaving the male.

"I've been good thank you, just trying to finish my portfolio for art."

Phina almost gagged at the way her friend was making heart eyes at the man. She pulled Mark into the booth they were sat at, earning a glare from her friend at their chosen seating arrangement.

"I like your new hair Renjun, have you dyed it?" Cheonsa's attention was back onto the male, swooning at the way he blushed that she'd noticed his hair.

"Yeah I just fancied a change. Do you think it looks okay-"

He was about the finish his sentence when the sudden buzz of his phone interrupted him. Confused, he put the phone to his ear, quizzing the caller.

"What's wrong? Are they being bad again?- Well I don't know....I can ask wait a sec-"

"Hey Cheonsa is it okay if my friend joins us?"

His eyes were pleading at her to let his friend come, and Phina wondered why he would even be pleading when he knew fair well that Cheonsa would agree to anything he said.

"Of course, anything for you." Cheonsa giggled, causing Phina to fake gag, and earning a chuckle from her brother and death glare from her friend.

After getting off the phone, Renjun announced his friend was round the corner and would go and grab him a drink from the counter, asking if anybody else wanting one too.

As he neared the counter, her friend sighed, love evident on her face.

"He's just so charming isn't he?" She sighed again, looking towards the boy she had a huge crush on.

"Yeh he's alright I guess-"

"Oh hey Sunshine, didn't know I'd be seeing you here."

Phina's eyes nearly popped out their sockets at the high pitched voice she could recognise anywhere.

Why did her day just keep getting worse.

[doof-doofblog]

"I've Got Everything Under Control!"

Friday 8th December 2021

Hello again everyone! Hope you're having a good weekend so far! Before we jump into the review of last nights episode, I have a little bit of a spoiler for you! It's been announced that there's going to be some big changed ahead for the Panesar family! What the entails however, remains to be seen! Part of me telling me that maybe we'll get a new member of the family, like the Father? We've heard a lot about Ash, Vinny and Kheerat's Father being in prison - but for what? Is he really a dangerous man, which is why the Panesar family behave the way they do? Who knows? What do you think the changes could be? Will we see a new family member or will the family go down a really dark road? Either way I'm looking forward to seeing it all unfold!

Firstly, let's talk about Sharon, Ian and their party to celebrate their marriage! It is just me or does anyone else actually feel sorry for Sharon? She's having to put on this absolute charade of actually being in love with Ian! Obviously she is doing this to get justice for her son, but something tells me she won't really be able to carry on for much longer. She is hating every single moment of being in Ian's presence, even more so being his wife! You can see the awkwardness in her face as when everyone is gathered in the pub to celebrate with the couple and she's stood behind the bar with Ian and he makes a romantic announcement and gesture of buying her a ring and placing it on her finger. She looks incredibly awkward and a little nervous also, but even having to kiss him must be awful for her, especially when she doesn't love him. When Ian says the words "I love you, Mrs Beale!" you can tell she can't even say the words back to him, she simply can't. Even if she is trying to play him, she refuses to say it! Even though I feel for Sharon, she is clearly a woman on a mission and she won't rest until her mission is complete, as later as she approaches Phil, he warns her that she needs to tread carefully if she's still planning on poisoning Ian. He's insisting that they wait a few more days until they start giving him more pills, however when Sharon reveals that she got pills from Jean, without her knowledge, Phil is stunned and warns her that she can't be stealing pills from other people and there could be a risk of getting the police involved. Regardless of his warning, Sharon makes it perfectly clear that she wants to job done as soon as possible, and if he refuses to help her, she'll do it herself!

The second thing I want to mention is Sonia. After a visibly emotional couple of days, she seems to have taken Ash's advice and come to the decision to take a flight to India and see her daughter, Bex and have a break. I just want to point out that this DOES NOT mean that Natalie Cassidy is leaving the soap for good, she is taking a temporary break and will be back later in the Spring. The only thing that is bugging me really is, we still don't know for sure what was causing Sonia to have her emotional outbreaks? Was it simply due to the fact that, because of her being a nurse and being surrounded by patients suffering and dying from Coronavirus, had it all got too much for her? And I'm still interested in finding out what that piece of jewellery was all about. She did explain it was from a patient she looked after - maybe I'm looking into too much, but I don't know, something tells me there's more to it? Will this break do her some good? How will she be feeling when she returns? All these questions are going through my head, even though I'm pretty sure the answers will remain a mystery. Before she leaves anyhow, she bumps into Martin and she can see he's got his own worries on his mind. With their history, she encourages Martin to open up to her. Before he does, he makes her promise not to mention it to anyone else, she gives him her word and he reveals that Ruby is pregnant. Sonia is clearly surprised by this news, but she can see from her ex's face that he's not at all happy about it, she questions whether they were even trying for a baby and he reveals that they weren't. Is Martin maybe thinking that Ruby cheated on him? Does he believe the baby is? Before she leaves, Sonia warns Martin that he has to speak to his wife about how he's feeling about her supposed pregnancy. I personally believe that Ruby is NOT pregnant, she's only saying that to keep hold of her husband, gain the attention she's desperately longing for, and also to get one up on Stacey! But if she isn't pregnant, it mean she will have to get pregnant pretty damn quick before her lies come to light! But, if not by Martin, then who? My first bet - Kush!!! What do you guys think? Is Ruby lying or telling the truth about her pregnancy?!

Thirdly, the next brief thing I want to mention is Gray and Karen. After a lengthy amount of time of the Atkins children living with her Grandparents, they have now moved back in with their Dad, even though Gray is happy to have his children back, Karen is visibly saddened. She asks her Son-In-Law whether she could still help more with the kids - take them to school, do their dinners etc etc. But Gray is adamant that he will be fine in supporting and being there for his children, however when Karen mentions that she's been telling the kids stories about their Mother, it looks as if he's not very happy with her interference. Later, when they're all sat at the dinner table, the children ask for a story about their Mum, much to Gray's surprise, Karen explains to him that it's been their ritual since living with them, having their dinner together and talking about Mummy. I have to mention though, did anyone see the disgust in Gray's face as his dinner was placed in front of him? I know it's bad but I found it kind of amusing how he wasn't impressed with the potato smilies and dinosaur chicken dippers placed in front of him! Suddenly the children start asking about Tina and where she was and how much they enjoyed her being around, it seems to get a bit too much for Gray, a little bit of anger gets to him and he informs his children that they won't be seeing Tina again and that she walked out on them! Even Karen is surprised by Gray's outburst - should Karen be more careful whilst she's around him? Something tells me he is going to more and more angry with her, of course she's just trying to help and keep the children close to their Mum, but he will end up resenting her for it and grow more and more angry and think she's interfering. Karen had better be very careful, I'd hate for her to be his 3rd victim! Also I just want to mention how lovely it is to finally see Bailey back! Feel like it's been so long since we've seen her!

The next thing I want to mention is Frankie. I'm so glad she's back and it's nice to see her having some screen time! Interestingly, she visits the Carter household in an attempt to see Mick, but unfortunately he's not there and she's left with Linda. I have to say though, this is the first time Linda has seen Frankie since learning the truth about her identity and I have to say how much I loved her kindness towards her, even offering to give her her number incase she ever needed anything. For some reason, I thought Linda would be full of questions for Frankie, but I think deep down, she knows that whatever happened between Mick and Katy, it's not Frankie's fault and she can't take it out on her. Frankie is innocent in all this and is a victim, just as much as Mick is, the only one who Linda's anger should be targeted at is Katy! Something tells me that Linda would be welcoming to Frankie and let her be a part of their family. It'll be interesting when Frankie finds out that Linda knows who she is. Later when Frankie attends the bar, she seems to be drinking her worries away - everything she's learnt about Mick and her Mum, even her Mum's offer to fly her away to Australia, she must feel that there's something not quite right? I have to mention that it's so nice to have Ben and Callum bumping into Frankie again after such a long time! Frankie was such a big impact on Ben's hearing loss storyline - it's nice to see them rekindling their friendship. However, when Ben and Callum share a kiss in the club, a bystander hurls abuse towards them, to which Frankie takes it upon herself to stand up for her friends. But when he suddenly mocks her, Frankie sees red and lashes out, beating the youth to a pulp. Ben and Callum have to rush to drag Frankie off of him, poor Callum though - after witnessing everything and having to follow his job role, he knows he can't simply let her go, even if she was sticking up for him and his boyfriend. Frankie is arrested for assault. Whilst at the station she decides to make a call to Linda, even though Linda knows it's her calling, she can't answer the phone at that current time as she's in the apartment with Mick. If he knew that she has given her number to his daughter, how would he react?! He's mentioned that he wants to try and forget about it, but I feel it's going to be hard for them not to? With Frankie back and Katy likely to make another appearance any time soon, I think it'll come to clear to the Carter family that Katy needs to get her comeuppance. After not being able to get through to Linda, Frankie then decides to call her Mum - what's going to happen next?!

Finally, the last thing I want to mention is Lucas, Denise, Patrick and Chelsea. Following the previous episode after Patrick collapses after having a confrontation with Lucas, it looked as if Lucas was going to leave Patrick to die. However Lucas did call an ambulance, informing the operator on the end of the phone that Patrick is having another stroke, however when they ask for Lucas's name - he simply hangs up the phone, as he knows he can't give that information. Later, after Denise has had a private word with Jack, she returns home to find Patrick alone and slumped on the couch, it becomes clear to her that he's in desperate need of an ambulance, she begins to panic and starts to call an ambulance. Poor Patrick though is trying to tell her something, only he can only muster one word "Lucas!" - leaving Denise even more terrified. She contemplates what he's trying to say - Did Lucas do this to him? Was Lucas in their house? Suddenly, an ambulance pulls up outside just in time and she rushes them in to Patrick's aid. The next big question is - Who called the ambulance?! Later at the hospital, all the family have gathered to hear on Patrick's progress - Denise, Sheree, Isaac and Kim are all waiting to hear news of the man who's at the very centre of their family. Eventually it becomes known that he has suffered another stroke and that he will have to be given more medication. Suddenly, Denise phone rings and it appears to be her daughter, Chelsea on the other line - interestingly she asks how Patrick is. Now this instantly answer's Denise's question - she wouldn't have known about Patrick unless Lucas knew, which means that he was there in their house when Patrick collapsed. Chelsea confirms this and asks her Mum to meet them as Lucas wants to talk to her. Denise seems very reluctant, but agrees to her daughter's request. Eventually she meets them away from the Square in an unknown Cafe ....  (Does anyone know what or where this Cafe is? As I've noticed it's been used a lot in recent months for secret meetings and for revels of character's returning!) ...  As Denise sits herself away from Lucas, she notices the bruises on his face, instantly he questions her involvement or her knowledge about his attack. Denise is instantly insulted and claims she has no knowledge about it, let alone has anything to do with it! However, when Lucas mentions Phil - it seems that she might know who was behind his attack, Patrick - but of course she wouldn't tell him that! Before she leaves, she warns him to stay away from the Square otherwise she will call the police! After she leaves, Lucas and Chelsea are sat together when her phone begins to ring, when Lucas proposes to buy her another drink, she steps outside to take the call - this is when things start to look a hell of a lot more interesting. It's unknown who she's on the phone to, but she's telling them she's getting the job done as soon as she can and she has everything under control! It becomes clear that she was in fact the one who was behind her Father's attack! Who is she talking to? Is Chelsea also out for revenge on her Father?! What is her secret?!

Oooooo so many questions and I can't wait to see everything revealed. So many things I'm looking forward to! Katy getting her comeuppance! I pray that Frankie will stay in the soap and become part of the Carter family! What's going to happen between Lucas and the Fox family?! Will Patrick be okay? Is Karen going to be Gray's 3rd victim?! When will Sharon's actions towards Ian come to light, and when will he know that she's aware of his actions due to her son's death?! Oh my gosh! There's so much speculation and I'm loving it!! Ha! I hope you've enjoyed reading! I hope you all have a brilliant weekend! I'll look forward to hearing any comments you may have! I'll be back very soon! Thank you all for your on-going support! Love you all xXx

[chickensarentcheap]

Best Part of Me - Chapter 3

WARNINGS: NONE

TAGGING: @c-a-v-a-l-r-y​, @innerpaperexpertcloud​, @alievans007​, @alievans007​

The clock reads 5:07 am when he snaps awake. Torn from a comfortable, almost pain free sleep by a nightmare. He hasn’t had one in three months; since the images of his wife’s brutalized and violated body in place of Erin Ferguson’s had finally subsided. That one had haunted him every night since returning from New Zealand; having him bolting awake, drenched in sweat, chest impossibly tight and making it difficult to breathe, tears streaming down his face. Those dreams had thankfully stopped just as fast as they began, and from that night on he’d been able to sleep reasonably well when paid didn’t wake him.

Tonight, he’d dreamt about Austin; the exact same images that he’d seen while dying on the Sultana Kamal Bridge. His tousled blond hair and his steel blue eyes and his sweet, innocent smile. Only this time he hadn’t been alone. Millie was with him and they’d been holding hand as they waded through the surf; talking and laughing as if they’d always known one another. Both smiling as they looked over their shoulders at him, holding their hands out towards them.  But when he’d reached out for them, they’d simply faded away, leaving him despondent and heartbroken and calling out for them.  It was then that he’d woke; eyes snapping open, feeling the sweat that beads on his brow and gathers at the nape of his neck and the small of his back, his lung fighting to draw a steady breath.  

It takes several minutes for his brain to register his surroundings; the smell and the sound of the ocean trickling through the screens of the wall to wall windows, his wife’s gentle, rhythmic breathing behind him,  the feel of her smooth leg pressed against his. She lays on her stomach, comforter pulled up to the back of her head, her bare feet sticking out at the bottom; the same sleeping position she’s had in the six years that they’ve shared a bed.  And he rolls over onto his side, fingertips gentle as they pull the comforter down to her shoulders and then brush her hair to the side; lips placing feathery kisses along smooth, warm skin, his palms sliding down her arms.

She gives a long, content sigh and her hands come up to rest over his; lacing their fingers together and then placing them against her stomach as she wriggles back into him.  “What time is it?” she inquires sleepily.

“Early,” he presses a kiss to her shoulder, then her ear.

“How early is early?”

“Quarter after five early.”

She groans. “What is wrong with you? Why do you insist on waking up at ungodly hours? You’re supposed to be retired.”

He’s been waking up at the crack of dawn for as long as he can remember, since his military days, and is able to function on little to no sleep. A trait that’s come in handy since having kids. Often the one that gets up in the middle of the night to change diapers and fetch bottles.  

“I told you,” his lips are on the side of her neck now. “I’ve got shit to do with Ovi today. And we have to go into Port Douglas. To my dad’s place.”  

The anxiety nags at him the second he mentions his old man. He’d reached out as soon as they’d moved back to Australia, but his father hadn’t requested to see him in person until a week ago. Sending him a text message in the middle of the night, rambling about things he needed done around the house and how he couldn’t handle them on his own. From what Tyler understood, the dementia was rapidly progressing; he had his good days and his bad days, and required a live-in personal support worker and a nurse that came every second day. He wanted to feel bad about it; that his old man was struggling. But the bitterness is still so raw; all the anger he’s been holding onto since he was a kid, the years he   had to listen and watch his father abuse his mother.  Abuse that was turned on him when he turned nine and his mum passed away. He can’t get past it; that rage that he hangs onto. The desire to teach the old man a lesson whether he remembers half the shit he’s done or not.

But he promised Esme he’d give it a shot, that he’d be the bigger man and try to put the past behind him, at least for the sake of his children. The kids deserved to spend time with their grandfather before it was too late, she felt. After all, her entire family -aside from Kyle- considered them dead.  Tyler could care less whether the kids ever saw his father, let alone spent time with him. Why expose them to someone that had caused so much agony in the first place?  

“Oh yeah…” she yawns noisily and rubs the side of her face against her pillow. “…and you’re okay with that?”

“How bad could it go? If things are as bad as his nurse says they are, he probably won’t even remember me. Maybe that’s a good thing; he won’t have a lot of shitty things to say about me or my mum.”

“Even if they aren’t that bad, don’t let him get to you. He’s a bitter old man who’s so miserable that he wants to make everyone else that way. I thought maybe he was turning over a new leaf when he’d contact me all the time, but…” she shrugs.  “Don’t let him get to you, Tyler. Just let it go in one ear and out the other.”

“We’ve been here six months and he’s called how many times? Twice? And never asked about the kids once? His only grandchildren?”

“I know it’s easy to take it personally, but if he has dementia, he likely doesn’t even remember even having grandchildren. He might remember you, but he probably doesn’t remember you have kids. I mean, Millie was two months old the first and only time he saw her.  And she’s almost six now.”

A little more than a month away. Until she hits that milestone. And he wonders if that is the reason behind the dream involving her and Austin. That she’ll be turning the exact age he’d been when he’d passed away. Part of him is even scared; that she’ll wake up that morning and be sick and it will turn out to be something horrible she will never recover from. It’s irrational and he knows it; the chances of that happening. But his brain doesn’t exactly recognize the difference between rational and irrational these days.

“Did the baby wake up?” she asks. “I thought you got out of bed earlier, but I didn’t know if it was for her or if you had pain or…”

“Around two thirty. I just got her a bottle instead of waking you up.”

“Baby, you’re the best. You spoil me. You let me sleep through the night, you let me take naps, you help me get off.”

He smirks. “Three times.”

“Yes…” she sighs happily. “…a very nice three times.”

“You almost woke the entire house the third time.”

She giggles into her pillow. “I can’t help it. You have that effect on me. If you weren’t so good at the things you do, there wouldn’t be a problem.”

“If I wasn’t so good at them, we wouldn’t be here right now.”

“It’s true. I would have had my five days of fun and that would have been it. If you hadn’t known what you were doing, it would have ‘boy, bye’.”

He chuckles into her hair. “That’s fucking harsh.”

“Well you had nothing to worry about obviously because it’s six years and five kids later and I’m still keeping you around. You’ve got some skills.”

“Yeah? You’re decent, I guess.”

“Fuck you, Tyler,” she huffs, and directs an elbow at his stomach.  

“I wish you could, actually.”

“Do you even have that in your cell phone? When the dry spy officially ends?”

“Maybe…”

“You have absolutely no shame,” she declares, and then rolls over to face him, pecking his lips. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For being you. For being the way you are. With me. With your kids. You put the work in. Without complaining about. You don’t piss and moan when the baby wakes up in the middle of the night or when you have to do dishes or laundry or take the garbage out.”

“Any man who complains about all that is a little bitch.”

“You’d be surprised. There’s a lot of little bitches out there. I’m lucky,” she kisses him again. “Very lucky. You help out, and you’re eye candy. What more could a woman want?”

“A big dick? Oh wait…”

“See? You’ve got it all,” she laughs and tucks her head under his chin, an arm curling around his neck, fingertips gliding back and forth at the bottom of his hairline.  

He wraps his arm around her, drawing her tight against him, hand rubbing her back in slow, smooth circles. She feels so good; the thin fabric of her tank top against his bare chest, the warmth that radiates from her, the feel of her lips and her breath against his throat. He closes his eyes, finding himself easily lulled back to sleep; the sensation of her fingers against the back of his head and pain in his shoulder and back settling down to a dull manageable ache. Until it’s interrupted by the alarm on his cell phone.

“Really?” Esme grumbles, as he rolls over onto his back and reaches for the phone.  

“Really,” Tyler sighs, turning off the alarm and then staring up at the ceiling; mentally trying to prepare himself for the day.  

Even with the pain, it isn’t the physically challenges that hold him back. He’s learned to live with it and work through it. It’s all the bullshit that does on inside of his brain.  The anxiety, the illogical fears, the hypervigilance. All working together to make it extremely difficult to function as a normal human being. He can’t believe what he’s been reduce to; not even half the man he was six years ago. When he got stare down the barrel of a gun and not even blink. Now there’s moments where he can’t even go into a store without something triggering him and bringing back all the memories and the trauma.

“Do you really have to get up this early?” Esme asks, as she moves closer to him, resting the side of her head against his chest, her hand on his stomach.  

“I do.”

“Like you can’t stay in bed for like ten more minutes?” she drags a finger down to the waist band of his boxers. In the beginning stages of things, they’d both preferred to sleep naked; loving the feel of skin pressed against skin. But back then they didn’t have little ones that could sneak up and burst into a room unannounced. Making some clothes a must.  

“Not even ten more minutes,” his hand captures hers, moving it back up to his chest.

“Fine,” she huffs, and reaches up to comb her fingers through his hair.  

“Go back to sleep,” he presses a kiss to her forehead. “I’ll get the baby if she wakes up. I’ll bring her to you before you leave.”

“You’re a keeper,” she says with a smile.  “You’ve even learned to put the toilet seat down and put your dirty laundry in the hamper. You can teach an old dog new tricks.”

He grins and slips out of bed, grabbing a pair of jeans and a t-shirt as she moves back over to her side of the bed; tucking one of his pillows underneath her head and then pulling the comforter back up past her eyes, kicking and wriggling her feet until they’re once again poking out from the bottom of the blanket.

“Be safe,” she says when he reaches the bedroom door.  

An old habit, he supposes, used to saying it every time he left for a job in the middle of the night or the wee hours of the morning. And it hurts his heart; that she’d become so accustomed to him leaving that those words are now second nature.

****

Ovi saunters up onto the back patio at quarter to six; hair still messy from sleep, eyes heavy. He’s grown considerably since the move, packing on the weight and the muscle: less stress, more eating right and a consistent work out schedule, and hard, manual labour. It isn’t a full time job by any stretch of the imagination, but their clients pay well and Tyler pays even better. Ovi and Chloe can live comfortably, pay all their bills, and never worry about finding themselves in financial trouble.

It’s become their routine. Sitting out back, drinking coffee and eating breakfast before setting out on the road. This morning neither of them offer a verbal greeting, instead exchanging smiles and nods before Ovi drops into the chair across from him. Both staying silent as they watch the sunrise, the rippling ocean painted in a brilliant, breathtaking golden hue.

Tyler doesn’t think he’ll ever get tired of the sunrises and sunsets, the smell of the salt that hangs in the air, the breeze that rolls in off the water. The mountains had been beautiful; it had been one hell of a view from the back deck at their place in Telluride. But nothing compares to this. Maybe he’s biased; he’d spent almost thirty-six years in Australia. It’s home. He’s admittedly much happier here, far more relaxed. The privacy and the seclusion not enough to solve all of his problems, but helping the healing process tremendously. He feels grounded. Secure. As if he’s finally able to put down real roots. Able to raise a family somewhere that feels totally safe.  

Ovi watches the final moments of the sunrise with the rim of his coffee mug pressed against his lips. There’s pure wonder in his eyes; as if it’s the first time he’s witnessed the scene playing out in front of him. Wide eyed and amazed, like a child on Christmas morning that’s rushed downstairs to find the living room covered in presents and treats.  

It reminds Tyler of the first time the kid had ever seen snow. He’d glanced up from the dinner table and had given a loud gasp, eyes impossibly wide, and dropped his fork onto his plate with a loud clatter as he sprung up from the table and out the sliding door. For a half an hour he’d stayed out there on the deck; clad in nothing but a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. Tears streaming down his face, unable to even form a proper sentence as he let the soft, white flakes fall onto his upturned palms, laughing when they got stuck in his lashes and his hair. Millie joining him and teaching him to catch the them on his tongue.  

After that he became fascinated with anything to do with winter. Throwing himself into helping the kids make snow angels and snow men, even building forts and having snowball fights. He and Tyler would go ice fishing on the weekends, their main bonding time. And he loved Christmas. Not necessarily getting gifts, but giving them. Enjoying the decorating of the tree and putting lights up on the house, and all the delicious food that he’d never been able to experience in India. He was a child again; filled with wonder and excitement, able to forget all about what happened in Dhaka and the trauma he still struggled with.

“That was an awesome one,” Ovi breathes, shaking his head in disbelief before turning to the plate of food in front of him. Nothing extravagant; some scrambled eggs, toast and a selection of various fresh fruit.  

Tyler nods in agreement, pushing food around his plate with his fork. The meds fuck with his stomach first thing in the morning; often not able to actually eat a meal but resorting to smoothies and supplements to get the calories into him. He likes the weight he’s at now; a little extra around the middle, but larger through the chest and shoulders, biceps and forearms bigger, as well as his thighs. He feels healthier than he has in years, maybe even since before Dhaka. He’d been running on nothing but booze and pain meds back then. And a death wish. Now he concentrates on what he’s putting into his body and how hard he works it.

Addie stirs in the car seat carrier that sits on the ground beside his chair; the soother tumbling out of her mouth, prompting that tiny whine that comes shortly before an epic meltdown. Two weeks old and she has a temper already; small and feisty, just like her mom. When putting the soother back in doesn’t work, he picks her up; laying her across his forearm, stomach down, her face rubbing against his skin as she settles into him.  

“I don’t know how you do it,” Ovi comments. “Make it look so easy.”

“It’s far from easy, mate. Trust me. Being a parent is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.”

“You don’t make it seem that way, though. You make it seem like you’ve been doing it forever. It’s only been six years.”

“I just learn as I go along. Pray I don’t screw it up. Or screw them up.”

“I think you’re doing a good job. A great job, actually. It’s still funny seeing you like this though. As daddy Tyler and not Tyler, Tyler. Do you ever miss it? Miss him?”

“Not often. But yeah, sometimes I do.”

He feels guilty for even saying it; as if he’s somehow disrespecting his wife and his kids. But he’d been Ovi’s age when he had joined the army and began building and honing his skills; the ones that he’d taken with him into the job. He'd spent years on the move; being deployed while in the military and then bouncing from job to job, never settling down, never having to worry or think about anything other than his work. Now everything had ended abruptly and with it came a much slower pace, consistency and routine, more responsibility. Not just for himself. But with six people that depend on him.

“Do you ever want to go back?” Ovi asks.

“Once or twice I’ve thought about it. But I’d never actually do it. I don’t have it in me anymore. Not mentally. I need to work on myself. Not worry about helping other people. And I kind of love my wife and the life we have together, and I want my marriage to work, so...” he sips his coffee. “I’d never do it. I lose everything. And no job is worth that.”

“So if something came up, you’d just say no?”

“Unless it’s a threat to my wife or my kids or you. Nothing will make me go back. What’s going on? Why are you asking me about all of this?”

“No reason,” Ovi shrugs.  “Just curious.”

“You’re a shitty liar. You always have been. Who’ve you been talking to? Nik? Yaz?”

“No one!” he insists. “I’ve just been thinking about things.”

“What kind of things?”  

“Things that I can do with my life. On top of what I do now. I thought maybe if you ever got back into it, I could too.”

“That’s never fucking happening,” Tyler scowls, and Addie begins to fuss again. Maybe even hearing the change in his tone of voice or feeling the tension that takes root in his body.  And he lifts her to his chest, a hand on the back of her head, fingertips gently rubbing in her dark hair. “Not for me.  Not for you.”

“We could build our own business,” Ovi suggests. “We could get the word out, take on clients.”

“I said no. We’re not doing that. We’re not even going to talk about it. Get that shit out of your head. All it’s going to lead you to is a really fucking dark place. Trust me.”

“The money is good! You used to say that all the time.”

“No amount of money is worth not coming home to my family. You’re the last person that should want to get into this. After everything you went through...everything you saw...why the fuck would you want to get involved in that crap?”

“It was exciting. When you had me take the kids. Being on the run like that. Being responsible for the lives of others. I finally got over being scared of everyone and everything. I want to help people. Just like you helped me.”

“I didn’t help you, mate. I fucked everything up. I fucked you up.”

“It wasn’t your fault that things went bad,” Ovi argues.  “It was my father’s fault. Not yours. You got me out of there alive. Even when you knew there was no money. And you almost died doing it.”

“And I don’t want you almost dying...or dying...trying to solve other peoples’ problems. We can’t save everyone. No matter how much we want to.”

“I just want to give back all the good I’ve been given.”

“Find something else to do then. Feed the homeless. Work at an animal shelter. Volunteer somewhere. Do anything that would make you feel good. But fuck the job. Don’t even think about it. You want to mess things up with Chloe? Because that’s how you’ll mess things up with her.”

“It didn’t mess things up with you and Esme.”

“Like hell it didn’t. We split up for six months. You know how close it came to her filing for divorce? You know how close I came to barely seeing my kids? It was a goddamn miracle she took me back. And I still kept doing the job and I still kept making promises I never kept and I still keep abandoning her and my kids. You don’t think that hasn’t caused problems? That I don’t pay for my shitty decisions every day? We see a marriage counsellor, for fuck sakes.”

“Chloe said she’s fine with it. That if that’s what I want to do...”

“You actually talked to her about this? About becoming a mercenary. Are you fucking serious right now? Why the hell would you do that?”

“She’s part of my life.  I can’t make a decision like that without talking to her about it.”

Tyler frowns. “You’ve actually been thinking about this? For how long?”

“I don’t know,” Ovi shrugs. “Couple months, I guess.”

“A couple months?! And you’re just bringing this up to me now?”

Addie begins to cry in earnest now; startled by him raising his voice.  And he pushes his chair away from the table and stands up, a palm against the back of her head, the other patting her back as he sways his body back and forth in an effort to calm her.  

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” he whispers harshly to Ovi. “Why would you even think about doing the job?”

“The excitement. The danger. The...”

“The danger is exactly why you shouldn’t want to do it. You saw what happened in Dhaka. You were right there the entire time. Why would you want to put yourself through that? And never mind that, why would you want to put Chloe through that?”

“You and Esme...”

“Don’t even bring Esme into this. I’ve screwed up. A lot. I’ve made a lot of mistakes that could have ended my marriage. We have to see a goddamn therapist to try and fix things. Is that you want? You want to screw up someone else’s life? Because that’s exactly what you’d be doing.”

“But if she’s okay with it...”

Ovi is interrupted by the sliding glass door opening; Esme holding it so Declan...in just a diaper and a t-shirt and his hair sticking up in all different directions...can toddle through.

“Sorry to interrupt, guys,” she gives a tired, sheepish smile. “But someone woke up wanting daddy.”

Little arms wrap around his leg and Declan rubs his forehead against Tyler’s jeans before looking up at him with a huge pout on his face and those blue eyes rimmed with red and filled with tears.  

“What’s a matter mate?” Tyler asked. “What did the mean lady do to you?”

“He was pissed because I had to change his diaper before I would bring him down here to see you. If one of them could not have your temper that would be great,” Esme helps herself to a sip of his smoothie. “Is she okay? Want me to take her? Just so this one...” she lays a hand on Declan’s head. “...doesn’t pitch a fit because he’s jealous?”

“She was just a little unsettled,” he says, handing his daughter off and then scooping Declan up onto his hip. Running a hand over his strawberry blond hair, pressing kisses to his cheeks; letting him grab at his ears and his beard and anything else he can get those little hands on before sitting down and settling him on his lap and helping Declan feed himself the leftover food on his plate.

“Oh typical,” Esme grumbles, and sits down beside Ovi,  settling Addie against her chest and laying the side of her head against her daughter’s.  “He knows daddy will give him ‘big people’ food. And you wonder why he’s going to be six six and two hundred and fifty pounds when he’s sixteen.”

“Don’t listen to the mean lady,” Tyler says to his son. “You’re going grow up and be big and strong and kick some major ass.”

“Ass,’ Declan repeats, and shoves scrambled egg into his mouth.

“Oh, way to go Tyler,” his wife sighs. “You couldn’t leave one all innocent and sweet. Don’t you dare think you’re going to be teaching my last one any of your potty words.”

He grins. “She’s going to be the worst one of them all. It’s always the small ones you’ve have to worry about.”

“Your dad talks a lot of nonsense,” Esme says to the baby, pressing a kiss to the side of her head. “Don’t listen to him. He’s a bad influence. He already has your sister beating up kids on the playground and using the F word.”

“She’s got a hell of a right hook,” Tyler says, and Ovi nods in agreement. “She messes up her brothers.”

“We don’t want people messing anyone up this house.  Don’t pay attention, Addie. You’re going to grow up sweet and kind and never hurt a fly.”

Tyler snorts. “Not if she’s your daughter she won’t.”

“Can you believe I put up with him? That I willingly do this every day? Listen to that mouth?”

“It’s the other things that I do with my mouth you like,” Tyler says, and shoots her a wink across the table.

Ovi nearly spits out a mouthful of coffee.

“Oh god...innocent ears...”  she places a hand over one of Addie’s ears, and then a hand over one of Ovi’s.  

“Yeah, he’s not so innocent. He’s probably getting it more than I am.”

Ovi bites down on his bottom lip and shakes his head in embarrassment.

“You’re not used to this yet?” Esme laughs. “You know what he’s like. You’ve lived with him for five years now. You know the crap he talks about. Only the strong survive in this house.”

Ovi wipes his hands on the thighs of his jeans and holds his hands out in a request to hold the baby. He’s always been a natural; taking on the role of a big brother the moment he’d first laid eyes on Millie when they’d travelled to Mumbai and stayed at the Mahajan house. Lending a helping hand in taking care of the kids whenever Tyler was out of the country on a job, never shying away from dirty diapers or spit up.  He is a calming presence. Never raising his voice or showing any signs of nervousness of anger. And Addie snuggles right into him, one of her hands gripping his shirt, her head against his shoulder.

“This is nice,” he smiles. “Babies are nice.”

“Remember that they’re always nicer when their someone else’s,” Esme says. “So you don’t end up with one of your own way before you’re ready for it. Because they’re sweet and they’re cute but they’re a lot of work.”

Tyler nods in agreement.

“So no kids, okay?” Esme tousles Ovi’s hair. “I’m not old enough to be a grandma. Give it a few years. At least. Okay?”

He nods in agreement.

“So what were you guys talking about? Things looked kind of intense when I came in.”

“Just stuff,” Ovi shrugs. “Nothing important, really.”

“For something that wasn’t important, you two looked like you were going to get into it about something. Everything alright?”

Both Ovi and Tyler nod.

Her eyes narrow. “What aren’t you guys telling me?”

“It was no big deal,” Tyler gives her a reassuring smile. “Just normal talk. Guy talk. Nothing serious.”

“Well I’ll let you guys get back to your guy stuff,” she says, ruffling Ovi’s hair once more before standing up. “I’ve got school lunches to make and bags to pack. Ughhhh. Is it the weekend yet?”  She places her hands on Tyler’s shoulders and presses a kiss to his cheek before heading inside.

“Whew...” Ovi breathes a sigh of relief. “...that was close. I thought she’d hear for sure.”

“Don’t ever bring the job up again,” Tyler’s voice is calm and even, his attention fully on the toddler in his lap. “I don’t ever want to hear it come out of your mouth. That’s not something you want to get involved in. And it’s not something I’m letting you drag me back into.”

“I wasn’t saying I was going to do it,” Ovi attempts to reason. “Just that I thought about it.”

“Well don’t think about. You’re too good for that. Way too good for it. Go back to school if you want. I’ll pay for it. I’ll support you no matter what you do. But not if you do that. You go into the job, I can’t have your back. I just can’t.  I can’t just sit on the sidelines and watch you kill yourself. Understand?”

Ovi nods.

“You deserve so much better than that life. So does Chloe. And I wish every day I never got back into it. That I’d just walked away for good. It would have saved me a whole lot of hurt.  It wasn’t fair to Esme. Or my kids. And that’s something I’ll have to live with for the rest of my life. Trust me, kid. You do not want that guilt on your shoulders.”

It will always be there. He knows it will.  He’ll spend his entire life looking for absolution that will never come.

[heyyyharry]

Chapter 9: On-screen Lover

(from the My Girl Trilogy: Be My Only)

…in which Harry struggles with acting for the first time in his life.

Warning: smut.

Word count: 6.1k

AU: actor!Harry, older!Harry, younger!Y/N, (4-year age gap).

Chapter 8: Sweet 25 - Y/N feels alone at Harry’s birthday party.

Wattpad link

A/N: The song mentioned in the chapter is Don't Keep Driving by The Paper Kites. This chapter is also inspired by The Archer by Taylor Swift (this is where all the anxiety comes from).

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Squirming in the soft, warm sheets, Y/N rubbed the remainders of sleep from her eyes to greet the rose-pink light of dawn. She supposed this was something most people would consider beautiful, but she didn't. Perhaps waking up grumpy and alone had clouded her judgment.

She slowly sat up, clinging on to the very last memory of the night before, but with little success. She remembered her and Harry drinking in the back of her car after the party. She remembered having sex on this bed — hot, intense, mind-blowing sex, which caused her to think it might've been just a crazy wet dream. Maybe he had never been here, maybe her brain had made everything up. But soon her doubt was washed away as she saw what he'd left on the nightstand.

Y/N lazily brushed her hair into place with her fingers and picked up the pink notebook to find a sticky note attached to the first page.

Morning, baby!

I was supposed to give this to you after my birthday party, but we got carried away and I forgot. Enjoy reading the other notes.

Your one and only,

Harry :)

Curious, Y/N flipped through her journal to find plenty of colorful sticky notes filled with his sloppy, yet adorable, handwriting. For every entry about him, he'd written a little message to retell the event from his point of view. He talked about how he'd felt when they first met in the treehouse, when he lost Thumper, when she kissed him for the first time and ran away...All the things he had wanted to say to her, but never had a chance to. And for her final entry, he'd added a line right next to her last one.

Your girl, always. (Now you're really my girl, always)

That morning, Y/N strolled down the streets of London, looking like she'd just won the lottery. She felt elated, her footsteps were light as a feather as she not only dodged between grumpy morning pedestrians but also said hello to them. She couldn't wait to see Eddie's reaction to her showing up this early. He would probably freak or even throw on a raincoat in case it started raining indoors.

"Good mor—"

"I'm in emotional distress!" Alice cried out the second Y/N walked in. "Harry Styles has a girlfriend!"

Those words froze her to the spot. She looked at Alice with her mouth agape, but Alice didn't give her time to let that sink in. The girl yanked the phone from Eddie, who was sitting quietly behind the counter, and showed Y/N a photo on Twitter.

"This just got released this morning. He was kissing someone at his birthday party last night!"

Y/N peered at the shot, feeling like her chest might explode. Fortunately, it'd been taken with a terrible camera, from a bad angle that you could mostly see Harry's back. But that one poor quality photo was all it took for Harry Styles to trend on Twitter. Fans were going insane and wanted to know the identity of this 'lucky girl'. Some, especially those who shipped him with Ruby, like Alice here, weren't thrilled at all.

"I'm going to kill myself. True love doesn't exist." Alice slammed her hands on the counter and dropped her head on them dramatically.

Eddie seemed concerned, yet too afraid to speak, so he signaled Y/N to say something.

"Hey, Al, I think..." Y/N trailed off as she shrugged off her coat and hung it up. "I think maybe Ruby and Harry are just...you know...normal friends...They're co-stars after all."

Alice groaned even louder, making Eddie roll his eyes. He nudged her with a pen and said, "at least now you know Ruby's not taken."

The girl lifted her contorted face to glare at him. "Oh please, as if one of us has a shot with her!" But then her eyes lit up, and she turned to Y/N. "Hey, you were at the party last night, right?"

"W-what?"

"I saw the story Isaac posted of you eating sushi."

"Oh, yeah." Y/N faked a laugh. "But I didn't see anything. I was in the house most of the time."

"Was Harry talking to someone there more than the others?"

"N-no, he was with his manager the whole night."

"What about Ruby? Was she there?"

Y/N parted her lips to speak, but thankfully, Eddie cut in, "give her a break, Al. She said she didn't know. Now please get to work."

"Fine!" Alice gave him a shrug. "Guess I'll be at the back using the new books to wipe my tears."

"Hey, if you do that I'll cut down your salary, ya hear me?!" Eddie shouted at the girl before turning back to Y/N.

The poor girl was still in shock. After all, it was the first time she'd gone viral. Though nobody had figured out it was her, she knew it was her in the photo, kissing Harry. And he wasn't just her Harry, he also belonged to everyone who knew and loved him. This feeling in the pit of her stomach made her feel sick. Her heart was beating like a drum, and her palms soaked with sweat. She didn't realize she'd spaced out until Eddie's voice pulled her back to reality.

"Y/N! Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm okay." She nodded fast.

Maybe she was naturally good at faking smiles, maybe Eddie was insensible to her feelings. Either way, she was glad he changed the topic.

"You're not gonna be here on Monday, right?" he asked, to her surprise.

It took her a second to realize that he was talking about Celine's wedding. "Right," she confirmed. "I'll be gone for a week."

The man clicked his tongue in frustration as he heard. "Oh God, I hope Alice's mental state will go back to normal soon."

"Has she ever been normal?"

"You're right. She's always been a little off. Now she's just worse." Sighing, Eddie fixed his glasses and went on, "are you going to the wedding alone? If you need a wedding date, I'm always available."

Wedding date. The voice inside her head sighed at those two words. Celine and Amala still thought that Harry would come back to Holmes Chapel with her to attend their wedding. They didn't know that their best friend was too afraid to ask him, for she already knew what the answer would be. There was no way he could squeeze a wedding in his tight schedule.

"I already have a date." She felt bad for lying to Eddie. But since when did she feel bad for lying? Being in love had really changed her.

"Guess I'm gonna have to take my mum to the movies next weekend," Eddie said with a shrug. "But I'm happy for you, Y/N. I showed up at my aunt's wedding alone and they put me in the kids' table. You wouldn't want that."

"Maybe because you look like one."

"Shut up!" The man waved her off and fixed his glasses. "Okay, get to work. I have to make sure Alice's not crying on my new books."

"Okay, love you, Ed!"

"You don't!"

Eddie had just walked away when Yellow by Coldplay blasted from Y/N's pocket. She didn't need to check who it was, because she'd set that ringtone especially for him.

"Hi." A corner of her mouth lifted as she could feel him smirking on the phone. "They gave us a five-minute break and I miss you," said Harry. His voice was raspy and low, so she imagined him hiding somewhere to make this call. The thought of them being secretive and sneaky when in public always excited her. She loved to think of them as the modern Romeo and Juliet, of course, minus the dying part.

Y/N rested her elbow on the countertop as she held the phone at her ear. "I miss you too," she said, grinning. "Saw your little surprise this morning. I loved it."

"I knew you would." He chuckled lowly. "Have you read any of my notes?"

"Just a few. I'll read the rest when I get home."

"Good." Again, the sound of his stupid smirk made the butterflies in her stomach soar. She found herself picking at the wood and chewing on her lip, like a nervous fourteen-year-old talking to her crush on the phone.

She hated to ruin this happy moment for them, but her anxiety didn't let her enjoy it fully. "Hey, baby," Y/N lowered her voice. "Have you seen the photo?"

"Yeah." He breathed. She could imagine his smile slowly fading. "It's awfully blurry though. No one knows it's you."

"It's taken from inside the house, H."

"I know. My team's trying to find out who took it. I bet it's the Declan twins."

Or Ruby, Y/N thought to herself, but decided not to say it aloud.

"Don't worry, kid. Whoever took that photo probably didn't even know it was you, or else they would've told the whole world already. Everything's fine."

Though Harry sounded calm, she didn't know for sure if that was how he actually felt. However, there was nothing she could do now but to leave it all to him. She'd signed up for this, and now she had to go with the flow.

"Hey, I have something to tell you," she changed the subject. This might not be the best time to pop the question, but since Eddie had brought up the whole 'wedding date' thing, she thought it wouldn't hurt to just ask. "So I'm going back to Holmes Chapel in two days, and I'll stay there for a week for Celine and Amala's wedding."

"You already told me that." He chuckled.

"Yeah, but...like..." Just say it, God damn it! "Would you like to go with me?"

"Back home?"

"I mean...yeah...Would you like to come as my...wedding date? I mean, only if you're free next weekend."

There was a long pause. And his answer was exactly what she had expected. "I'm really sorry, love," he said with a heavy sigh. What came next, however, was completely out of nowhere. "I'll be in Paris for the next two weeks."

"P-Paris?" She felt a lump in a throat and struggled to release the words from her mouth. "You'll be in Paris for what?"

"We're filming some scenes there. I'm...I'm actually...leaving in two days. I was going to tell you last night but..."

Two days?!

"How long have you known about this?"

"Uh..."

"Harry!"

"S-since the first day we started shooting."

His answer felt like an ice bucket in the face for her. She was surprised she hadn't hung up on him yet. "So you've known since the day we officially got together and kept it from me this whole time?"

"No, that's not—" He stopped himself with a hiss. "The trip was supposed to be at the end of next month, but they've made a few changes—"

"I don't care if it's next week or next month! You knew, and you didn't tell me!"

"I'm really sorry." His voice lowered. "Are you...are you mad at me?"

"I'm not," she said, staring at the ceiling.

"Really?" he questioned as if testing the water. "Because I'm pretty mad at myself."

"Look, it's fine. We'll talk more about it tonight, okay?"

"Promise you're not mad at me?"

"Harry..."

"Promise me, please!"

"Fine! I promise I'm not mad at you." Y/N exhaled. She wished she could be mad at him, but then again, people who were in love didn't feel and think the way normal people did in certain situations. With this man, Y/N knew she had gone too far from being sane.

"Good," Harry happily said, probably wearing that boyish grin that she adored. "Now say you love me."

"I love you. Gosh, you're such a baby sometimes."

"I love you too, Bambi," he responded with a light chuckle. "See you at home."

It was the first time he'd referred to her cheap flat as 'home'. He probably didn't even think when he said it. Still, it meant so much to her. It made her feel secure even though this was the most insecure position she had ever been in. And so she kept replaying the word in her head and telling herself that everything would be just fine.

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Harry stepped into the shower, fully clothed, toes flinching as they touched the cool tiled floor. His mind was in shreds as he watched the drops trickled down her bare back and slowly looked up to meet her questioning stare. Guilt washed over him like a tidal wave, but he refused to acknowledge it.

Ruby didn't say a word, not asking him to leave, not asking him to stay. She turned her head and resumed bathing her skin gently, letting the lukewarm water darken her hair. The unfamiliar melody she was humming got Harry distracted as he stepped forward, and circled his strong arms around her little waist. He pulled her in, pressing her naked form firmly against his clothed chest. Now his face and neck were flushed, not just because of the steamy shower.

The ex-lover ran her hands across his arms and her body shuddered at his slightest touch. Slowly, she turned around, their eyes met once again. The air almost drained out of his lungs as he finally found the courage to reach for her face. His fingertips followed the water streaming down her cheeks to her neck, then her shoulders and her arms. Ruby breathed out gently as goosebumps pimpled her skin.

Her voice was soft. "I thought you wouldn't come back."

"I...I had to," Harry faltered. "I missed you...so much."

She gave him a bashful smile and then guided his hands to her hips. "I know you did," she said contently.

Without breaking their eye contact, she began to unbutton his shirt, pushing it off his shoulders. Her palms smoothed across the tattoos on his chest, the ones that she'd touched and kissed and tasted too many times before. As she lifted her face, Harry lowered his head.

"Take me," she murmured, her lips ghosting over his. "Show me how much you missed me."

His entire body was on fire, but it wasn't the kind of burn that brought him comfort. Now he was gawking at the naked girl without blinking. Shit. What was he supposed to say next?

"Cut!"

Harry snapped back to reality as all the lights came on and the director told the whole crew to take five. As he followed Ruby out of the shower, two girls from her team came with a big towel to help her get dry and into her robe. The ones on his team tried to do the same to him, but he waved them off and took the towel to do it himself.

"Mon Dieu! What's going on between you two?" asked the French lady in the quirky satin dress as she pointed to Ruby, her eyes on him. "Do you hate her?"

"N-no, I—"

"Then stop acting like you do!" she cried out. "Harry, sweetheart, I love you to death but that was terrible! You were supposed to be her amant, the lover who kept coming back every time she pushed you away! You were supposed to love her more than anything in this world! That wasn't what I saw back there. It felt like she loved you completely and you didn't even want to be with her."

"I'm sorry, Eva. I'll...I'll fix it."

"Non!" The director shook her head. "You cannot do that alone. Both of you, talk to each other and work things out! We'll shoot another scene later and will do this scene again tomorrow."

"But—"

"Early lunch for everyone else!"

As Eva ignored Harry and walked off, he was left alone with Ruby and their gigantic problem. She was wearing the biggest frown, so he expected her to come at him with a her most ruthless comments. But no, she calmly took the towel around his neck and began to help him dry his hair and his face.

Flustered, he pushed her hands away. "It's...it's okay. I can do it myself."

Ruby froze for a second. Her eyes narrowed as she shoved the towel back in his hands. That was how he knew this conversation would not turn out the way their director wanted.

"Look into my eyes and be honest with me," she spoke with her arms crossed. "Do you hate me?"

"No."

"Because if you do, you should say it aloud so we can get it over with."

"I don't hate you." He breathed into his palm and shoved that hand into his damp hair. "But after what happened last night, I don't know if I even want to be around you anymore."

"What I said was wrong, but those were just harmless words!" She rolled her eyes and soon noticed the change in his expression. "Go ahead," said the actress, to his surprise. "I know what you're thinking, so go ahead and say it."

"Did you take that photo?"

"Fuck you," she spat, but made sure not to draw any attention in this room to them. "Look what she's done to you, H. You're worrying about her way too much that it starts to affect everything you do."

"She hasn't done anything to me," he grumbled as she was getting on his nerves. "But what have you done to yourself? Why are you so hateful now? I moved on and I'm in love. Why can't you just be happy for me and fucking accept that?"

Though Ruby appeared unbothered by those words, both of them knew they had never hit her harder. Even so, she didn't allow herself to look vulnerable.

"How you feel about me, and how I feel about you and that girl have nothing to do with this," she asserted, anger overtook her face. "Yes, I'm still in love with you, and I think you two are bad for each other because she will ruin your career. But when the camera starts rolling, we aren't you and me anymore, we're Elia and Jay. So if Jay cannot love Elia because Harry's afraid his little girlfriend can't handle a simple sex scene, then maybe Harry's a terrible actor and should consider giving the role to someone more deserving."

And then she stormed off, leaving him standing there with the damage her cruel and thoughtless words had done.

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When Y/N answered the call from her boyfriend, she knew right away that he was drunk. He greeted her with the loudest "I love you, my sweet Bambi!" and jabbered away just to hang up because he needed to pee. A few missed calls and unread messages later, he finally made it back to her place.

He stumbled into the flat with his hair a mess and his shirt half-untucked. The first thing he did was wrap his arms around her waist. The words "I miss you" and "I'm sorry" poured endlessly from his lips. Though drunk, he still remembered how she felt about him visiting her so late and plastered.

Last year, he'd told her that alcohol used to be his coping mechanism. Once he'd started, he didn't know how to stop. Each drink seemed like a better idea, his jokes got funnier and he could flirt with any woman he fancied. He felt more charming and witty and invincible. That was why for months after his scandalous break up with Ruby, he'd had a drinking problem which he'd proudly called therapy. And Y/N guessed it had happened again today. Something bad had happened to him at work and he needed to feel better about himself. It saddened her that he'd chosen alcohol instead of coming home and talking to her.

With a six-foot man glued to her front, Y/N struggled to reach the door and lock it with one hand. His grip around her waist tightened as he hummed into her neck, making her think he would pass out, but then he said, "I kissed her and she was naked...and I didn't like it at all..."

The little confession froze her to the spot. Y/N swallowed as she pulled away and her arms came around his neck, bringing his forehead to hers. "Kiss who? Ruby?"

He nodded with hooded eyes. "I don't wanna hurt you, but I made everyone angry. Do you...do you think...I'm a bad actor?"

"No, of course not." She cupped his flushed cheeks. Although she didn't fully understand the story, she could guess most of it. Now a part of her felt guilty knowing she was the reason he couldn't do his job. He even assumed it was his fault, that he was bad at something he'd been passionate about for most of his life.

"Wait on the couch, I'll draw you a bath," she said, changing the subject, but he kept on nuzzling her neck and refused to let her go.

"What's it that you use?" he asked quietly. "You smell like...like my mother's garden in the spring."

His lovely comparison made her smile. "That's what you would smell like if you were sober and clean."

"I am sober and clean!"

"No, you're not. You need a bath or you'll be sleeping on the couch tonight."

"Will you join me?" He puckered up his lips while slightly tugging at her t-shirt. "Take this off. Get naked and join me."

"Harry..."

"Please? I'll be good. You don't have to fuck me."

Her mouth twitched in amusement as he brushed his nose against hers. She had just taken a shower before he arrived, but a warm bath didn't sound like a bad idea. After all, she desperately needed to get rid of the smell of alcohol on her body.

Taking his hand, she led him to the bathroom and asked him to wait for her to return with some clothes and towels. However, he didn't listen and ended up following her around like a lost puppy. As they waited for the tub to get filled, he sat on the edge with her and tried to braid her hair. The steam helped sober him up, so by the time they finished taking off their clothes, he had become more self-aware.

Y/N sat between his legs, with her back against his chest and her head on his shoulder. She'd made it clear that they were both too exhausted to have sex, but once his fingers had found her clit, her moans encouraged him to continue. The next thing she knew, she was riding him. His head tilted back on his neck, and small grunts snuck passed his lips every time she sunk back down on him, fucking him slow and steady.

It started out as sweet love-making, until Harry couldn't take it anymore and gripped her hips, driving himself into her. She clung to the back of his neck with one hand, the other smacked flat to the tile wall above his head as he thrust harder, sloshing more water out of the tub. She was the first to come, shouting his name as his body tightened and his cock twitched against her sensitive walls. She rode him through his orgasm until there was nothing left of them but heavy limps, numb fingertips, and fireworks exploding in their minds.

Harry panted and bit down lightly on her shoulder as he recovered. Her eyes slowly opened and took in the sight of him chewing on his delicious lip, his brows puckered up, and his eyes lazy. She watched the tiny beads racing down his handsome face, not sure if it was sweat or their bathwater, but she knew they would have to draw another bath.

"No, Harry, I can't. I'm too tired," he mocked and his softened penis slipped out of her, making they both groan.

"You do that voice again and you'll be sucking your own dick," she warned him, her nose scrunched up. The threat made Harry chuckle as he pulled her in and kissed her twice on the mouth.

While waiting for Harry to refill the tub, Y/N went to get her phone and put her playlist on shuffle. She put the phone in a cup, placed it on the sink before joining Harry in the water again. They sat in the same position with her back against his chest.

The light in Y/N's bathroom was bright and sterile, lacking even a trace of warmth. That was why she normally hated to look at herself in her bathroom mirror. All the scars she'd got growing up would shine like a beacon under this light, and then she'd be reminded that she wasn't his perfect girl. But tonight, she wanted to stay here forever with him so he could caress all the places she hated on her body.

Half of this city turning their lights on Like half of this city has an idea Cars slowly passing right down on main street Don't keep on driving, let me say something

"What's the name of this song?" he asked, breaking the silence between them.

"Don't Keep Driving by The Paper Kites," she said with a beam. "You love it?"

He gave her a nod and nibbled at her earlobe. "It's a good song. Makes me feel like I'm driving around the city at night while it's raining."

"Exactly!" She brightened. "I listened to it on repeat while we were apart last year."

"Does it remind you of me?"

His question made her smile. Still, she never answered.

There's nothing wrong with a little space But not right now, don't leave There's nothing wrong with a little time But for the memories, for the good things Don't leave

"Did you write me those notes to make up for the Paris thing?" she asked all of a sudden.

He gave her a nod, but then realized she was facing away from him, so he spoke, "yeah."

"Hmm." Not the response he was hoping to hear.

"Have you read them all?" he went on to make sure she wasn't upset.

She didn't sound upset when she said, "not yet, I'm saving them for when you're not here."

"I'll video-call you every night to see your reaction when you read them."

His chest felt a thousand times lighter when her giggle softened the room, as if her gentle sound could turn this cold light golden and the water warmer.

His heart was full again, but at the same time, he couldn't ignore the melancholy feeling sinking in. He knew that he would miss her a lot when he was away. Two weeks wasn't a long time, but for a relationship as fragile as theirs, it could feel as long as two months or even two years. Who knew what would happen during those two weeks? They had a lot to lose now that they had each other.

Don't leave me Call me Turn around, turn around now Don't run away from me Don't leave, don't leave

The song went on, coming to an end, but its last words were still echoing in his head.

.

.

.

Harry had stayed up all night to mentally prepare himself to reshoot the sex scene. Even though Y/N had reassured him that she trusted him and understood that it was just for his role, he felt as if his lungs were on fire as he stepped into the shower and ran his hands all over his ex's body. But because Ruby continued to give him the silent treatment, he gave a better performance this time and didn't have to reshoot the scene.

Maybe he'd lulled himself into thinking if he didn't interact with Ruby off-camera, then it wouldn't feel like he was cheating on his girlfriend. But how was this fair to Y/N at all? If he were her, he wouldn't be able to stand someone else touching her the way Ruby had touched him, for a movie scene or not. Knowing his girl, he knew that even if his job did bother her, she wouldn't admit it to make him worried. That, unfortunately, made him a thousand times more anxious.

Last night, while drinking alone, he'd thought a lot about what Ruby had said. Though she was wrong about Y/N, she was right about most things, one of which was, he and Y/N might not be right for each other. At least, he might not be right for her. That thought came and went several times since he'd woken up, but he kept brushing it off. Because the last thing he needed right now was self-doubt. He'd struggled so hard to make her his, and now he was afraid that he didn't deserve to have her. That sounded absurd, stupid even. Still, he kept pondering it.

It was around 3 AM when he finished his last scene of the (previous) day. His plane to Paris departed at six-fifteen and he had to be at the airport at five, which gave him less than two hours to rest before the flight. As he got in the car, he immediately phoned his assistant to get his luggage ready and bring it to the airport. Then he asked his driver to take him to Y/N's place.

He had texted her in the afternoon that he might head straight to the airport after finishing work, and also promised to call her when he arrived in Paris. That had been the plan before he changed his mind at the last minute. He couldn't stand leaving without a proper goodbye. For such an emergency, he was glad she'd given him the key to her place. He didn't have to wake her up when he arrived.

Pulling his hoodie over his head, he went to her room, trying not to make a sound, but she had heard him come in and was already staring at the door, expecting him. She watched him take off his jeans, leaving only his t-shirt and boxers on as he slid under the duvets and cuddled her. Though her eyes were red from the lack of sleep, she was smiling, content, and at the same time, wondering.

"Aren't you supposed to be at the airport?" she asked.

"Not yet," he replied, kissing her forehead. "I'll hold you for a moment, and then I'll go."

He expected a cheeky response, but his Bambi didn't make another sound. She was just happy with the fact that he was here, so it didn't take her too long to fall back to sleep. Harry, on the other hand, couldn't close his eyes. Even though he'd set an alarm on his phone, he was wide awake and staring at the ceiling. He feared that if he took some rest, time would fly much faster, then goodbye would come much faster, and he had to leave much faster. He wasn't ready yet.

Lying still, he focused on the sound of her breathing and counted the number of times she talked in her sleep. Eleven in total. She never made sense, but he thought it was endearing because each time she spoke, she would shift closer to him. As time and space slowed down around them, unexpectedly came an ominous thought. Would she be happier if she had stayed with Isaac?

If she'd stayed with Isaac, she wouldn't have to wake up alone, she would never have to worry about her boyfriend making out with someone else and calling it acting, and she would've been able to kiss him in front of his friends at his birthday party. Scared by the thought, he squeezed her tighter. But that was also when the buzzing of his phone told him it was time for him to go.

He tried to be as careful as he could to sneak out without waking her up, but it wasn't his fault that Y/N was sensitive to the quietest noise. Slowly, she stirred awake and sat up as he did. Her voice tore down the gloomy silence of the room.

"Stay with me."

He looked over his shoulder and his heart almost broke when he saw her face. He'd never seen her like this, at least not when she was sober. His girl was tough and independent, and she'd never begged for his attention. But now she was clinging onto him like a little octopus, her face in his neck. He wished he could stay, but sadly, he wasn't the one to decide.

"I have to go now, love."

"No." She shook her head, pouting slightly. He was caught off guard when she snuck her fingers into his boxers and slowly stroked his hardened length up and down.

"Bambi, no." He gasped, his nostrils flared and so did his pupils. Quickly, he seized her wrist and groaned when the warmth of her soft hand left his erection, but he knew if he hadn't stopped her he'd give in and missed that Goddamn flight.

"I'll make it up to you when I get back, baby. I promise," he said, watching her lie back down and cover her face with both hands.

"It's gonna be the longest two weeks of my life," she groaned.

He rubbed her knee, scooting back to the center of the bed and sat with his legs crossed. She propped herself up on her elbow, now lying on her side, looking at him. In this orange bedroom light, her skin looked so warm, and her eyes so dark. He reached out and touched her face, stroking her bottom lip with his thumb. She was hypnotizing him with those sweet doe eyes, her ultimate weapon that got her exactly what she wanted and how she wanted. He had never won a battle against them before.

"What are you—"

"Shh."

Getting on his knees, he lifted her thighs and spread her legs. She was bare under the oversized t-shirt, already glistening and ready for him. He pressed a delicate kiss to her inner thigh, so close to where she needed him the most as his eyes fixated on her, taking in the breathtaking sight of his love with her head tossed back, her eyes shut and mouth agape. If only his mind could take pictures of her looking like this and save them for when he was alone in a different city.

"Harry, please, make me come."

And he'd miss this too, the way she moaned his name and begged for his touch. Smirking, he took her hands which were gripping the pillow and guided them to his hair. "Show me how you want it," he ordered, his breath made her hips buck in his face and she tugged hard, just like he'd asked her to. Who was he to deny her then?

He began with a closed-mouth kiss, followed by a wet and messier one before his tongue stroked into her, lapping at her moisture. Her heat tightened when he pulled away, his mouth returned to her clit as he worked two fingers in and out of her. The slippery sounds were driving her insane. She was a delicious mess when he held her down and lapped his tongue skillfully, not letting her arousal go to waste. Y/N had never come this hard and fast, she thought she might've passed out for a second. Her fists were tight against his skull, but he loved it, he let her ride his face and fingers until she was too spent and delirious to even flinch.

"Oh, shit..."

Harry broke into laughter as he crawled up to attach their lips for a dirty kiss, letting her have a taste of herself before he pulled back to admire her face.

"Hi." He grinned, his dimples were more prominent in the hazy bedroom light. She loved his dimples. She loved his smile. She loved this face. She loved him. When he pulled away and helped her up, her stomach clenched in the most unpleasant way.

He carried her to the bathroom. She hated when he picked her up like a child, but she didn't have a choice as her knees were too weak for her to walk on her own. After getting her cleaned up, they returned to the bedroom and he began putting on his clothes. She sat on the edge of the bed in silence, watching the man she loved get dressed. He wore that black hoodie she'd got for him because she didn't want him to get cold on the plane. She knew he'd got plenty of hoodies that were more expensive and could keep him warm much better. She'd only wanted an excuse to buy him clothes. At least now he could carry her warmth with him to another country.

She walked him to the door. Her heart sank lower to his every step and when he turned back to kiss her goodbye. She held him tightly, arms locked around his neck, inhaling his scent for the last time before he went.

"I love when you're like this." He chuckled. "So clingy."

"Shut up," she rasped, but not letting go. "Call me when you get to the hotel?"

"I will. I love you so much."

"I love you more."

For every single 'I love you's they'd said to each other until now, they had always meant it. But this time, they meant it more than ever. Y/N supposed normal couples didn't say goodbye this way. Some didn't even bother to say goodbye at all when one of them went away for only two weeks. But normal couples didn't have to hide from the rest of the world nor face the never-ending fear of losing each other for the hundredth time. Maybe one day, they could be one of those normal couples. But right now, this was all they got.

After sending him out of the door, Y/N went back inside so she didn't have to watch him leave. It would break her heart and she'd burst into tears and made a fool out of herself.

Telling himself the same thing, Harry rushed down the stairs and didn't look back, not even once.