#I know my process for art is kind of weird. I usually sketch on paper then fix the lines in Clip Studio and print it out and trace it

[blueoctopussss]

Been thinking about what Ashton's FCG-inspired vest might look like, so here is a sketch based on that! I'm not 100% happy with it and I feel like it should maybe have a quote from FCG on it or something, but I'm posting it anyway because not everything has to be perfect.

I did make a long sleeve variant because they need warm clothes for the journey to Aeor, but I don't think it looks as nice.

[coolfireguy73]

I love your art style so much! If it's not weird to say, I aspire for my art to be like yours someday :)

Two questions:

1. The way you add different element to your traditional drawings (Different paper, colours, or materials is amazing. I'd love to hear about that process if you're willing to share

2. For the cryptid AU, it seems like everyone kept some remnants of their weaponry/knowledge. You've talked abt Engie purposefully not using his buildings, so I'm curious about what might have happened to the Medigun/s

Thank you for indulging my curiosity, I hope your day is good :)

First off: sorry to reply so late !!!

I wanted to reply to your question properly and take my time to share my process, so I waited until I had time to do so.

Anyway:

First question

I've filled up a lot of sketch books over the years and on of the problems I had was the emptiness of the pages.

I used to draw very small and like... one drawing per page.

I always loved how scrapbook looked, but was never able to fully integrate it in my sketch books (I'm still working on it)

Until I saw what David Armsby sketch books looked like. I mean, they aren't really sketch books but they included drawings and they looked so good ! They made me realize I could totally do something like that !

I started really trying to implement scrapbooking things in my sketch books one or two years ago. And I really should have stared sooner.

So, how do I go about it.

1. Colored paper

Usually when I start a new page I just draw what I have in mind. Then I'll glue pieces of colored paper in some of the empty spaces to draw on top of. Like this page for exemple:

I first drew Old medic in the center, then glued the two red papers and drew on top of them. Doesn't really matter what drawing will go on top of which paper. The whole point of this is to make the page seem more full and busy.

There are two other ways I use colored paper. One, I draw directly on the colored paper, then glue it in my sketch book, or I cut it depending on the size of the drawings:

And two, I already know what I will draw and I want to use colored paper to add to it, for exemple those Medic faces:

Then, you can use all of those on the same page:

Note, you can use all kind of paper, all colors, texture, motif, etc... You can also glue colored paper on top of different colored paper, go nuts, I'd recommend looking at scrapbooks for inspiration. Or any core and aesthetics you like really.

Also, I haven't used then yet but I bought thoes:

These are just craft packs I found for cheap. They provide really cool paper I can use in the future. I also have a pack of normal colored paper.

2. Hate space

Try to fill the page as much as possible.

I've learned to hate every small inch of blank space on each page, if there is any I will try to find a small drawing to make or a doodle or glue more paper etc...

And if I don't find anything I'll come back to it later.

I'm still struggling with this part 😅 

3. Stickers and tape

Another thing that can help you fill your sketchbook are stickers and colored tape.

If you don't have any idea of what to put to fill a hole it's very easy to just stick a sticker there.

The tape, I use for places a piece of paper would be to big (I usually write the date on it)

All in all, Just put whatever you want. You can add glitter, glue seashells and flowers and leafs, or candy wrapper even, the choice is your's really.

You should be proud and happy about your sketch book. It's yours, have fun with it !

Second question

I'll be easier to replie to this one 😅 

Most of the weapons were left at the base, like Sasha and, yes, Medic's medigun.

But that's normal, Medic was sent to a mental hospital, I don't think they would let him bring his medigun. Same for Heavy, he just went to get back medic, he didn't really need Sasha.

Sniper and Demoman still have their weapons because they were already quite affected when they left and already acted somewhat aggressively so, naturally, they brought their weapons whit them.

Hope this answers your questions, and again, sorry to reply this late 😅 

[eebie]

Sorry if this is kind of a strange question, I'm sure my wording is weird as it's hard to explain this in words, but would you be open sometime to maybe demonstrating/explaining/(not sure what word honestly) how you go about your doodles? There's this quality that's particularly noticeable in your sketches and less polished work where your grasp of things like movement and main forms and stuff becomes obvious- basically, you're pretty good at comprehending the bigger picture- and as someone who struggles with getting caught up in details to the point where it impedes my ability to draw, I'm curious to see if I can get into your brain a little bit.

sure!! it's very easy to get caught up in all the deets when it comes to drawing, n i totally relate. Sometimes as im drawing, i notice myself slowly drifting into more detail oriented stuff before i even get the main 'picture' of what im tryna draw down, and when i catch myself i have to be like LEAVE IT like i'm a dog trying 2 eat something i shouldnt off of the ground N haul myself back on track. it's very much something you have to unlearn, rushing to get the final thing you're picturing in your mind down on paper ASAP.

there's a metaphor I like to use with the tendency of bein stuck on the details: Imagine someone's carving a statue. Usually it starts off with em carving out a rough shape of one large stone, and only then moving onto the details once everything is sorted. Pretty straightfoward, right? Now, imagine they're trying to carve the same statue, but instead of doing that on one large, coherent piece of stone, working in stages, they immediately go to carve every detail out onto individual pieces which will then be stuck together (like a puzzle) to form the statue at the end. The results will be hella janky, and it will take MUCH more time to achieve something satisfactory, because there was no rough guideline that came before going into detail. you're essentially working backwards.

so i really try to focus on getting that gesture down before Anything else. gotta know where everything goes before you think about detail, and it can feel really awkward at first, it was for me, but it is an incredible help. Look at some of the gesture sketch examples that you can find on google, or even better watch videos of people doing it! For my figure sketching, i start with a single line that represents the spine, (S and C shapes are super important! Use them!) and then two rough shapes to represent the hips and shoulders. then it all branches out from there. You start with the trunk of the tree, then the branches, and then the leaves.

And it doesn't hurt to brush up on your general anatomy as well, cos it does help with knowing where things go. I really recommend watching Sycra, I learned almost everything about drawing anatomy from him ( https://www.youtube.com/user/sycra ) His story's pretty inspiring too, as he started art Very late and still became an incredible artist Hell yeah.

ik its better to actually See this stuff so here's a rough sketch to show my process :

[plagueislost]

Hii, for the artist ask game: number 4 and 10 is something I'd love to know :3

i wrote A LOT for this ask, sorry! i wanted to do the questions justice, yknow how it is.

4. piece you wish got more love?

Ive found from experience that original art tends to not do very well on social media, which kind of makes me sad. It's not much of a problem for me (because most of the stuff i post is fanart anyways) but i can't help but think that part of the reason i rarely ever draw original pieces or make OCs is because of the lack of feedback i get on social media. I know tumblr is supposed to be the fandom website, and maybe id have a different experience on another site, but it is disappointing when i post something original that I'm very proud of and it barely manages to get more than 20 notes, whereas something i like less easily surpasses 100 just because of the tags i put on it. i think the most recent example of this is this piece, which admittedly did get quite a few notes for an original piece, but definitely would have gotten more had it been fanart of the same caliber. this is also not to blame anyone or make anyone feel bad about not reblogging original art (god knows im guilty of that too, and art piggybacking off the popularity of other works of art are of course gonna get more notes), its just something ive noticed from my time on social media.

10. how do you deal with artblock?

i dont get art block very often, but when i do, its ANNOYING. it mostly manifests in me having a bunch of motivation for a part of my process that i cant get to without doing the stuff i have no desire to do (does that make any sense?). like, ill have a strong urge to render an artwork, but no ongoing WIPs that are at that stage, meaning i would have to sketch and color and shade a whole new piece before i could satiate that urge, or do the steps out of order which could mess up the flow and end look of a project. when i get like this, i find its best to try and translate those desires into different activities and take a step away from art. for example:

if i want to sketch, but nothing comes out right digitally, ill find a scrap piece of paper and a crappy pen and make thumbnails until i cant think of any other iterations of the ideas in my head. if one of them turns out good, ill take a picture and transfer it into my software, but only go over it a day or so later so i can have fresh eyes.

if i want to color, but i have no sketches currently ready for coloring, ill go into my photo editing program, find some random old photos that i never edited, and post-process them until i get something im happy with.

if i want to shade, but have no colored artworks ready for that, ill usually do a study of a photo ive taken, because most of the time me shading is really me wanting to see how light and shadow interact in certain scenarios. i actually did a whole AP portfolio on that because i liked shading and lighting so much!

if i want to render, but ive got no pieces ready for rendering, i find its easiest just to find a tedious activity where i can be a perfectionist but also feel like im the smartest person in the world. this generally turns into me cooking some big meal because its constantly engaging but also not that difficult. i know its probably weird for it to not have anything to do with art but this is just what works best for me, and i get the bonus of a nice meal at the end of it!

if i get the more classic kind of art block where everything sucks and nothing i make is good, i find its best to go back to the media that inspires me to make art, and not worry too much about having made something by the end of it. generally the media that inspires me ends up, well, inspiring me, and i can remind myself that art is a voluntary practice that i do because its fun, not because i want something out of it. if it doesnt manage to inspire me, thats okay, i can just tell myself im taking a break and live life for a bit.

i hope that was helpful, and i really enjoyed answering these questions! if anyone else wants to ask a question, the artist ask game is here.

[comicaurora]

How old were you when you decided to start taking Aurora seriously? ("taking seriously" as in, deciding to start making it a comic, and putting work into making it come to life rather than it just be a dream project or a fun thought)

File dates indicate I first started drawing proper test pages for the comic at the very beginning of 2018 (a random snippet of a very early draft of Dainix's intro arc, just to get a feel for the comic tools in CSP) although I remember I had drawn up some short experimental intro comics probably as early as 2016, and I had full digital illustrations of some of the characters in my college application portfolio around 2013-2014, although I don't think any of those made it onto my current computer.

I started on the proper comic, like the actual illustrated pages that made it onto the site, in march of 2019, but it seems like I created those files as early as october of 2017, so it's possible I was playing with the sketch of the first chapter pretty dang early.

It's a little tricky to answer this question, because the very first form this story took was comics I drew in my old sketchbooks, so there was never a time when I didn't want to make it exist in some comic-shaped form. Initially I just wanted to make a story for me to read, because I was very bored and hungry for fantasy that wasn't boring, depressing or both. But somewhere along the line it occurred to me that I could make something other people would want to read too. I don't know exactly when I made that switch - I suspect it was fairly early in the process, because due to who I am as a person I have a very strong urge to share what I make. For me, just making the thing wasn't enough - I got so much more energy from showing it to people and discussing it with them than just drawing it for myself. I got zero interest or positive feedback from my peers in middle school and quickly resolved not to share anything until I was certain it was good, which in hindsight was a maladaptive attempt to avoid being bullied by people who, shockingly, didn't actually determine their bullying schedule off any internal logic I could work around. But it did motivate me to practice a lot and branch out artistically in directions that had previously not interested me. Having a distant but attainable end goal was exactly the kind of carrot on a stick I needed to lure my baby ADHD brain into actually sticking with something for a change.

At this stage I'd say it was firmly "I want to do this someday." Not because it wasn't practical or realistic, but because I wasn't ready. That's how it was through most of high school, though after I got my first drawing tablet and began exploring digital art around 2012-2013, things went from "it'd be cool someday" to "I have the tools I need to do this as soon as I'm ready." After that I started playing with drawing programs, acclimating to the weird experience of using a drawing tablet instead of pencil on paper, and even toying with a little simple cel animation with the built-in bare-bones app that came with my tablet.

The idea of drawing the illustrations for the videos I was starting to do came from the same impulse - I wanted to get better at digital art, and needed to in order to make the comic a viable possibility. Again, it let me trick my brain into focusing on getting really good at something, which was a practice I'd never been able to sustain for long without a concrete end goal in mind. Sticking with something for its own sake didn't work - I needed that delicious dopamine feedback to keep me going, and the constant rush of "I'm getting better at this and that's getting me closer to this thing I really really want" apparently did the trick.

But I actually think this is around where I started faltering - late high school and very early college, so like 2012-2014. Aurora was the first big writing project I'd ever really loved, and I knew from experience that first writing projects were usually bad. They were valuable for skill-building and refinement, but were they actually worth showing to anyone? Plus my notes/timeline file had gotten really massive and unwieldy at this point, and playing with the cast and story was turning into a chore of continuity rather than a fun exercise. It was getting bloated - rather than making the story go anywhere I was just adding little bits onto it every time they occurred to me. Every cool idea I was having had to be mashed into this one world I was playing with, and I worried it was getting out of hand. So I dropped it for over a year and spent my time playing with an urban fantasy ghost story concept instead. That got far enough in development that I still have a saved color swatch for it.

I played with it and built it out and felt more serious and cool with this Edgy Dark Adventure with a psychopomp vs an immortal witch vampire and a wild cast of colorful supporting weirdos, and then I realized I was really bored. Once again I'd built a cast of characters without a plot to actually use them, only this time they weren't even characters I particularly liked.

So I tentatively went back to Aurora. I think this can't have been much before 2014, but I'm not certain on that. And with the benefit of a year's time on the backburner, I'd boiled it down to the core elements I really liked and rendered out all the filler and padding I'd stuffed it full of back when I was just using it to store every cool idea and character I had. I was relieved to know that this story and cast of characters I liked so much was turning out to be actually worth exploring, and I went a lot harder on the worldbuilding and establishing an actual set of arcs and plots to keep the characters engaged and occupied by an interesting diversity of setpieces, side characters and events.

By early college (2014-2015) I think I was back in the swing of things, determined to actually make the comic happen (once I was ready and good enough, natch) and enthused about rewriting the basic arcs and beats from scratch rather than touching that bloated timeline file I'd abandoned a year earlier. By junior year (2017) I have a distinct memory of doodling out the first designs for Tynan in my Greek Thought And Lit course, which is a pretty good indicator that I was getting committed to the granular parts of the story.

It wasn't until after I graduated in 2018 that I really started thinking about, you know. actually doing it. not someday, now. I was free from school and mentally decompressing from a decade and a half of nonstop stress and pressure, the channel had hit its first major jump and was actually making us a proper living so I didn't need to pivot to a job hunt like I'd feared, and if I didn't bite the bullet and start immediately I would probably just keep procrastinating it out of a mounting sense of guilt and insecurity until I couldn't bear to look at it again. Sure, I could still get better, but at that point I'd done enough headfirst dives into the unknown to conclude that it is literally impossible to fully prepare for something before you experience it for the first time. If I kept waiting until I felt ready, I would never start. So that's around when I started looking into building the site, drawing up the first three chapters and going from there. Sometimes you gotta say "fuck it", push yourself off the diving board and hope you figure something out before you hit the water.

[sparkling-moonbeam]

Xiao x Reader (Genshin Impact)                 🍀A Subject🍀

A/N: It’s been a while since I posted something so here’s a Xiao one. Sorry, it took a while but I’ll try me best to write more since vacation is now here. Reader is gender-neutral. Hope you enjoy reading!

🍀💐🍀🍀💐🍀🍀💐🍀🍀💐🍀🍀💐🍀🍀💐🍀🍀💐🍀🍀💐🍀🍀💐

Black smokes and a pair of golden eyes. It’s the first thing that caught your eye as you arrived in the rooftop of the Wangshu Inn, a place that the traveler recommended on you as you told them you’re planning to go to Liyue, looking for a subject to sketch. The traveler warned you on the dangers you might encounter, making sure to remind you to call a friend of theirs in times of great danger and when you try to questioned it:

“He knows what to do. He’s an adeptus, a protector of Liyue,” they stated.

“Like a Knight of Favonious?” you questioned.

“You can say that…except the fact he works directly for their archon and really held great responsibility for the duties that the Geo archon laid upon him,” they explained further. “Oh and, please don’t forget to call him in case of danger. His name is-”

“Xiao.”

You uttered, staring into his golden eyes. You notice the black smokes surrounding him, you don’t know if it’s the effect of the teleportation he used or something else. You also take note of the spear he’s holding, the color same with the tips of his upfront hair. The once peaceful feeling on the terrace suddenly disappearing as the intense tension in the air completely evaporated it.

“How do you know my name?” He questioned, eyes squinting in suspicion. “You don’t seem like a citizen here. State your business.”

You blinked, “I-I’m from Mondstadt, I’m a friend of the traveler that-”

“The traveler, you say?”

As soon as he heard that, his whole demeanor changed. The black smokes slowly disappearing into thin air, clearing the whole tension that build up earlier. His grip on the spear relaxing a bit as he continues to inspect you.

“Did they send you here?”

His eyes remained looking at you carefully, maybe taking notes of your actions and what you might be up to. If not for mentioning the traveler, you might be in great danger now. Thank the Archons, the traveler warned you and lend you their knowledge for this trip.

“Not…exactly.” You answered, smiling slightly as you try to explain your reason. “You see, I came here because I need a new subject-”

“For what?”

“…Sketching an art. The traveler just assisted me on the things I should know before going here. They told me about you and to call you if ever I face something..really dangerous?”

He didn’t move an inch after your explanation. His lips remained in a straight line as he stared at you, processing your words before flipping his spear into the air which quickly disappeared in a blink. The movement making you flinch a little.

“The traveler’s right. In any case that you face something dangerous ahead, call my name. I’ll take care of it.”

He turned his back at you, looking at the view on the terrace as if scrutinizing every place around the inn. You watched as the wind blew, his hair dancing with it as the leaves on the tree fell into the terrace. You gently tiptoed to the side, not really going near him as it might put you in a bad situation. The sun reflecting half of his face add effects on what you were witnessing just right now. His gold eyes looking seriously but also faraway. You notice how the tips of his hair and his eyes seems to glow, you thought it might be because of the shade of the tree and the sun. His pale lips never moving an inch, remaining still like before.

You were too busy taking notes of everything you’re seeing. It’s perfect, way too perfect, in all honestly. The timing, the lighting and him, it’s pretty. A beautiful sight that you’re actually witnessing right now. A smile escaped your lips as you were taken in by the view. Fascinating.

“What are you still doing here?”

You blinked as he took a glance at you. All of your thoughts moving away for a second. Your smile turning into an awkward one as you thought he caught you looking too intensely at him.

“N-Nothing.” You tried to laugh, fixing your gaze into his gold orbs. “I just…really wanted to stay for a while. I mean, the scenery here is breathe taking like really breathe taking.”

He blinked slightly, confusion filling his eyes as he continued to look at you. You’re being weird in his eyes; your actions are too baffling for him. “You should go somewhere. Liyue has more places to offer with breath taking views. Don’t come near me as it might bring you in danger.”

Your head tilted in confusion, looking at him with a blank stare. “I don’t get it.”

“What?”

“I mean, you told me to call you whenever there’s danger and yet you threat yourself as a danger too. Aren’t you the protector of this city, Liyue?”

He scoffed. “You know there’s different kind of protectors, right?”

“Oh, so you mean like a vigilant or something. You’re like that?” you questioned; your voice fills with curiosity.

“Yes. Now, stay away-”

“But still, you’re just doing your duty right?” You cut him off unexpectedly. “Regardless of how evil or dangerous your actions are in your eyes, at the end of the day, it’s for the safety of the people here.”

He looked away, “You don’t get it, it’s much more complicated than that.”

You smiled, sitting down as you grab your sketching materials from your bag. “Can you explain it to me then?”

He sighed, “It’s something hard to-”

He stopped as soon as he saw you sitting down, a brush and a piece of paper in front of you as you were surrounded by brushes. At first, he was confused at what you were doing then it hits him.

“Are you secretly just keeping me distracted by talking to me?”

You hummed, glancing at him. “Not really, I’m curious too but I won’t pass any opportunity to sketch something…remarkable.”

“You’re wasting your time. Like what I said, there’s a whole lot of places than-”

“Say, can I…interest you into something?”

He looked at you in confusion. His eyes eyeing your brushes and other materials on the floor. You’re cutting his words, usually it was him that always cut someone off. It’s amusing, he thought but you’re being bizarre on your actions as time goes by. It’s not unusual for him to find a really determined and hard-headed mortals and you give off the same aura, except that you’re not begging him to give you wealth or something.

“Hello?” He snapped to reality as he heard your voice. You smiled as his eyes meet yours. “Are you okay?”

He closed his eyes; you should be no exception still. A mere mortal like you can’t get close too much to him or you’ll suffer, sooner and later.

“Get all of your stuff and leave.”

You lean back to the railings of the terrace, a sad smile forming your lips as you sighed. “Don’t I really stand a chance?”

“I told you, no.”

“Even if you’re the subject?”

His eyebrows knitted. “What? Do you really think that would make a difference?”

You chuckled. “Look, I’m trying. I’m not a good persuader like the traveler.”

He sighed, “You’re hopeless.”

A laughter escaped your lips on his remark. He looked at you as you laugh. He was never one for jokes, that meant to be an insult, he thought. Why are you laughing so light-heartedly? He wanted to ask you but you seem like you’re really having your time laughing and for some reason, he don’t want to disturb you. It’s the first time someone laughed at his comment with no any sign of malicious intent or hurt.

“Alright, I’m fine.” You fix yourself, fixing your throat for a second to stop yourself from laughing. “But seriously, don’t you wanted to see yourself in-”

“I’m not interested. A common behaviour of mortals like you was to always look for something priceable. I assumed you’re just going to sell it in high price anyway.”

You gasped in exaggeration, clutching your heart in a jokingly manner as you look at him. “That’s a very harmful stereotype to the people out there!”

“It was a normal act for mortals,” he deadpanned.

You hummed, “I mean, you’re not entirely wrong…”

“Because it’s what they are.”

You looked at the sky, thinking about what he said. “Say, do you have some deep grudge against these mortals?”

“Don’t call them like you’re not a part of them,” he stated.

You pouted. “I’m just asking.”

“Stop asking then.”

A sigh escaped your lips. “I don’t really sell some of my works, I only sell paintings or sketches of sceneries. It’s different when it’s personal.”

“Personal?”

“Something that really caught my eye, you know. Like what they said, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Whenever I see those moments, I keep them or sometimes I gave them to the people I shared the memories with. So…”

You looked at him, a warm smile on your lips. “I’ll give it to you once I’m done.”

He turned to you with a puzzled look, “What benefit is there for you then?”

“Connection with different people.”

“You should get close too much-”

“I know. Just let me sketch you and the scenery, then we’re finished,” you stated.

“Will you keep-”

“It’s a deal. I will keep those words.”

He looked at you intently as he tried to decipher your mind but no matter how he tried to looked at you, his curiosity just eats him more. You’re a weird one, he wanted to tell you but instead he kept it in his mind. He has a feeling you’ll just laugh again anyways.

He looked away. “Fine, just do it quickly.”

You cheered before picking up your brush again. “If I do it quickly, I won’t caught it perfectly.”

“You’re the one who wanted this,” he stated.

You pursed your lips. “It’s not my fault if I found my subject earlier than I anticipated.”

He glanced at you for a second before returning his gaze to the scenery ahead of him. He took note of the orange hue of the sky and the cold breeze of the wind. He closed his eyes as a thought entered his mind.

Maybe he can let this one slide.

[anotheranimestan]

Sweet Intoxication

Tamaki fans!! Come get yo juice!

Tamaki fluff with a lil spice (just a lil)

wc: 3.2k

I can’t be the only one who thinks the Suneater is 🤤 I could write about him for days

Being UA High’s #4 ranked third year, it’s no surprise you’d created a great friendship with the Big Three. You were particularly close with the group’s resident “kitten” as Nejire liked to call him. You met during your first year when you were sat next to each other during class. He was so shy and wouldn’t talk to anyone except Mirio, even despite your many attempts at making conversation.

Until one day, you hurt yourself during practical training and he offered to walk you to the nurses office (much to everyone’s surprise). The entire time he was dead silent with a look of pure embarrassment across his face since you had to cling to him to walk. Once he dropped you off you expected him to leave while Recovery Girl fixed you up. But when you exited the office, there he was. Sitting on the floor waiting for you, his face riddle with concern.

When he spotted you his eyes lit up. “So um-are you okay y/n?”

It was the first time you got to hear his soft voice so clearly. It made your heart swell. You knew right then you wanted to keep him.

Ever after that moment you two stayed close and kept an eye on each other. He was still timid at first but over the years it blossomed into an air-tight friendship. You were practically apart of the Amajiki family after the amount of dinners you had with them. Not a day went by that you two didn’t walk home from school together.

That is until today. You see, during lunch Nejire let it slip that Tamaki had a crush on you when she thought you couldn’t hear. Little did she know you were standing right behind her as you approached the lunch table.

You were so caught off guard and your eyes grew wide as you locked eyes with your best friend. His face was pure horrid humiliation. Mirio desperately tried to make light of the situation and pretend it was all a joke but the damage had already been done.

Tamaki immediately fled the cafeteria, knocking over a few first years on his way out.

You were still frozen in place trying to process what was happening. You definitely didn’t expect him to have a crush on anyone, let alone you. He never talked about romantic interests like that. And considering he tells you almost everything on his mind you’d think you’d have some sort of inkling about this.

Your train of thought was quickly interrupted by the horrible thought of how much of a hit to Tamaki’s self-confidence this probably was. He’d become so much stronger and more social. You couldn’t let all his hard work get reversed.

You chased after him but he was gone. Disappeared off the face of the planet for the rest of the day.

You were worried sick and couldn’t think about anything else but finding him.

As soon as the final bell rang you bolted for the Amajiki house. Of course his mother let you in with no hesitations and immediately informed you of his exact location (His room. Where else? That’s where he was always hiding). Although the suspicious look on her face told you that Tamaki’s condition must be bad. He probably came home early and locked himself away without a word. Not completely out of character, let’s be honest, but still it didn’t put you at ease.

You slowly approached his door trying to form some kind of plan to fix this. What was the best tactic though? Should you tell him? Tell him that you’ve secretly been crushing on him this whole time? Since that day at the nurse’s office when he held your hand for the first time? When his voice alone captured your heart. You were sick over the thought. You’d desperately tried to keep it a secret and hadn’t told anyone, even Nejire (for obvious reasons). You were scared that you’d scare him away with your feelings. You’d rather have him as a friend than nothing but that didn’t stop you from constantly dreaming of kissing him or holding hands again or cuddling every night while watching his favorite movies.

You didn’t have an exact plan but you desperately wanted him back so you had to try something. Anything.

The door was locked. You knocked as gently as possible. He was easy to scare.

“Tamaki? It’s me. Let me in.”

You heard a miserable groan from behind the door. “Please leave me alone to die.” He plead from inside. Always one for the dramatics. Something you secretly loved.

“Come on! You’re really going to lock me out like this? A bit dramatic don’t you think?” You insisted, slightly amused.

And just like that the lock clicked open. You let yourself in. It was dark except a little glowing ball lamp in the corner of the room that illuminated everything up with an indigo glow.

He was sitting on his bed against the wall, hugging his knees and burying his face.

You shut the door behind you and stood for a moment. You really just wanted to run over there and cuddle him. Tell him every reason you’re putty for him. But you didn’t want to push him. There was an art to dealing with a mopey Tamaki and you knew it well.

“So how long have you been sitting up here? I hope you at least finally ate some lunch.”

He peeked his head up at you. You were rustling a bag filled with his favorite snacks. You saved these in your locker for moments exactly like these.

Your heart fluttered when you saw those eyes you loved so much. Although his eyebrow were furrowed in embarrassment, still, he looked adorable as ever.

You took this moment as an opening and slowly approached, careful not to spook.

You took the spot directly in front of him. He’d still not managed to look you directly in the eyes.

“Sooo...” This is where you had no game plan left.

You finally had the chance to feel nervous now that you knew he was okay. Your heart started racing in your chest as the anxiety coursed through your body.

“This is the worst day of my life.” He concluded covering his face again with his hands.

You rolled your eyes. “I think there are worse things.”

“Like what?” He said like he was proving a point.

“Like...” You exhaled and gave your honest answer without thinking. “losing your best friend.”

He groaned again. “That’s exactly what I’m saying, y/n!”

Your head tilted. “What?”

“I can never talk to you again now.” The pure teenage agony in his voice was ridiculous.

You giggled. “You’re talking to me right now, dummy.”

“And now you’re laughing at me.” He leaned his head back against the wall in distress.

You reached up and grabbed one of his hands, pulling it away from his face.

“I’ll be very offended if you stop talking to me.” You inform him with humor in your tone.

He looked down at you finally. You were breaking through.

“But...aren’t you weirded out?” He was grimacing at the horrible cafeteria memory that had been replaying nonstop in his mind.

You laughed.

“No more weirded out than usual.” You poke him in the stomach. He was aggressively ticklish so he jumped and grabbed your hand instinctively. Now you could see his whole face again and you were so relieved. You missed it.

His eyes were trained on your hands and he nervously played with your fingers. He did this a lot and it always sent butterflies flying in your stomach.

“You ran out the cafeteria so fast you didn’t even stay for my reaction. Also, those first years are gonna be looking for revenge tomorrow.”

He cracked a tiny smile.

“So...what is your reaction?”

The nerves were really electric now. You almost panicked. Were you really about to admit to your long time crush just how head over heels you were for him?

You were silent for a while which didn’t put Tamaki at ease. He was sure you were going to reject him. You were way out of his league. You were heavenly and pure beauty in his eyes. You could make him warm just by smiling at him that’s how much he loved your aura. How could you be into a loser like him. He could barely stand up straight next to you and the other members of the Big Three. You didn’t know it but right under the bed you sat on he had a hidden a sketch book filled with his drawings of you. Or at least attempts as he called them. He could never capture the curl of your eyelashes or the soft slope of your neck quite right. And the lips. They were always off. Yours had this perfect kissable quality to them that he wished he could experience rather than just draw onto paper.

His pining was interrupted by your sharp inhale as you began to answer. He looked at you under his thick lashes, dying to hear your response. It made your cheeks burn and the words get caught in your throat. Your mind must have overheated because it completely shut down and your body acted on its own.

You didn’t say a word. You just pulled his legs down from against his body and climbed onto him. You wrapped your arms and legs completely around his body like a teddy bear and squeezed him tight.

At first he was stunned but quickly recovered and hugged you back. Your hair was completely covering his face but it was comforting being indulged in your familiar scent of shampoo.

You two confided in each other for a long moment. No words could express what you were trying to say.

After a while you pulled back to look at him. Big mistake. The soft glow of the rich indigo light made him look dream-like. Suddenly you were picturing all the things you had been imagining doing with him...to him.

He wasn’t blind to the way you were staring at him. Blank eyes lost in thought and lips parted like they wanted something. You looked angelic. Sitting on his lap and holding him tight. You were exactly what he needed.

He knew this could be the moment he’d been waiting for all these years. But of course his usual anxiety was holding him back from experiencing you like he wanted. You were so so perfect. He couldn’t possibly...

Your brain switched on just for a moment to spill out a few incoherent words. “I want...this....you. I’ve been.”

Overwhelmed by your words he finally gave into his desires as his head dipped down into the nook of your neck. His lips hovered over your skin and you felt his hot breath ticking your sensitive spot. You wished he wasn’t so hesitant but you could also easily savor this moment forever. Tamaki was finally satisfying your craving for him.

Your hand rolled up gently into his silky hair and your eyes fluttered shut when he finally made contact.

His lips were so soft and molded perfectly into the curve of your neck. He slowly trailed around your collar bones and up to your ear.

Your face nuzzled into him as he tasted you.

His gentle touch made your heart swell and bespelled your body to curl into him more and more.

His tongue began grazing the tender skin he’d laid the ground work on. Dragging circles around your sweet spots and sealing them with kisses. His warm breath sending chills through your through your muscles.

The sweet rhythm of his breathing, his snug hold on your waist and the vibrating hums of enjoyment resounding in his chest...

He was mesmerizing. This little Suneater easily held you in a trance like it was nothing and without even knowing it. Your body was soft like dough, molding into him as you succumbed to his warmth. Your head had fallen limp to the side so he could access as much as he desired.

His voice was thick like honey as he shyly spoke into your ear. “You...taste really good.”

Your eyes were still locked shut, under hypnosis but a smile spread across your face.

“Does that mean one of your limbs is going to turn into me?” You said with a drunk little giggle.

He noticeably shrunk under your words. “Please don’t tease me. You’re making me so nervous already.” He cried desperately.

Your eyes finally cracked open to look at him properly. His face was wrapped in conflict and self-doubt as usual.

So many responses flashed through your mind but only one managed it’s way past your lips. There was truly only one thing you wanted to say anyways. “Can you kiss me please?”

You needed more of him, his previous performance already had you hooked and aching.

Red flush spread across his cheekbones and the tips of his pointy ears. His gaze fell under as he considered something. “I’ve been wanting to do that for a long time. I’m honestly surprised I’m even getting the chance.”

As if you weren’t already deep under his spell, his words managed to further melt you like butter.

His voice was dark velvet. A sharp contrast to his normal shaky tone. “I just want to ask...do you really like me?”

“Tamaki...forget like...I’m pretty sure I’m in love with you.”

Your words slipped out of your mouth but it was like hearing them underwater. You were so detached from reality in this moment. Just pure bliss was conducting your movements while your mind was on hiatus.

His red washed face turned bashful as he tried to comprehend your words. He couldn’t stop a cute little grin from spreading across his face.

Before he could recover enough to verbally respond, your thumb placed itself on his bottom lip that was still lightly swollen from exploring your neck. The weight of your hand pulled it down to expose his pearly white bottom teeth.

This pouty look made him even more appealing, your mouth was practically watering at the handsome sight before you.

He acknowledged your hungry look as his invitation and his pouty lip puckered around the pad of your thumb. He placed kisses on each of your fingers and finally your knuckles before he pulled you close to him.

The movement wafted some of his cologne into your nose and just like that you were drunk on him again. He could have you.

His lips pressed into yours and it was like your whole world came to fruition. You realized then just how badly you’d wanted this. He trapped your bottom lip and gently sucked letting his tongue start it’s magic again.

Your arms contracted around his neck to pull him as close as possible and he respectively deepened his kiss.

He nibbled on your lip just enough for butterflies to start flapping around on your chest. Just when you think you’ve hit sensory overload he whips out something new. You already identified kissing him as your new addiction before your first kiss was even over.

His confidence was slowly building as he became more familiar with the curves of your mouth. Assessing exactly what you were liking by the barely audible gasps of euphoria you were making.

He strung you along for a while like this, each next move being more endearing than the last until finally he pulled away to give your lungs a chance to pull in some air. Obviously you didn’t want oxygen right now but at least you got to be intoxicated by some more of his scent.

“You’re so pretty.” He mused as his eyes glazed over your features. “And—and your lips are really soft.”

Suddenly a little self-consciousness washed over you. You weren’t used to his compliments like that. You accommodated this by nuzzling your face into his. Your lips were drawn to his cheek and you littered kissed all over, using your other hand to trace his jawline. He closed his eyes so he could focus on your touch. It was sending him over an edge having you on him like this. You felt his breathing deepen as you started gently sucking on the nook of his neck. Your hand fell and started exploring his chest. He didn’t look it but he was concealing muscle under his baggy shirts and you were dying to feel them.

Just when your teeth grazed the red blood pooled spot you’d been working on, a soft moan escaped his lips. He was lost under your control.

Without warning he shifted you down on your back with ease. Taking care to support your head as you fell onto the pillow.

He crawled on top of you between your legs and supported his weight on his forearms.

This sudden bold streak was really turning you on.

He spared no time as he tugged your shirt collar down just a bit to expose that sensitive part of your neck again that he just loved so much.

His tongue teased it with a few gentle circles before his mouth came down instense and started sucking.

Normally this sort of thing would hurt but you were so entranced that it only felt like a rush of intense pleasure. You ran your fingers through his hair encouraging him to do exactly what you suspected he was doing. You squirmed gently under his heavy body as he targeted your neck. Your hands slipped under his shirt and you got to feel the smooth skin over his broad back muscles which contracted as he moved.

Suddenly you let out a little squeal as the pleasure turned to a little shooting pain. He snapped out of it and brought his face back to yours. Nose to nose.

You glanced down at his work to see a little red bruise the size of a coin. For some reason you loved the idea of Tamaki giving you a little mark.

“Sorry y/n, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

You bit your lip, his concerned face was so cute. It reminded you of that day so long ago when you first realized you wanted him.

“Put another one.” You said only half joking.

He laughed nervously. You took his face in both your hands. Today couldn’t have gone more perfectly.

“I didn’t reply before but...I want you too.” He mews with soft eyes.

Just when you think your body is completely melted, he finds one more spot he missed.

He placed a few more gentle honeyed kisses on your lips before anyone could say anything else.

But much to your dissatisfaction, you heard Mrs. Amajiki call for dinner. You were prepared to aggressively reject this interruption but Tamaki’s smile broke your resolve.

He tucked some hair behind your ear as he spoke again after what felt like hour had passed since the last time. “Can we do this again like...soon?”

He was aggressively adorable you could barely stand it. You merely nodded in response you couldn’t possibly form any coherent words right now.

You laid there, trying to unmelt yourself with little success. You could only gaze at your little Suneater with twinkling admiration in your eyes as he lifted you to stand up in his arms.

His new love bite was still exposed on your neck. He pulled your sweater up to cover it and kissed it through fabric as he muttered a few more quiet apologies. You immediately started thinking of ways you could try to permanently keep it on your skin.

You eventually walk down to dinner together holding hands, fingers interlocked. Yea...he was definitely your new addiction.

~~

Thanks for reading 🥰

[bogkeep]

Hey! I'm the one who asked the poorly worded art process question. I'm here to give it another try by being more specific. The problem is . . . that's hard. Because that was about a specific as I can get, since I kind of want to know everything about how your art works.

Big things, like how you come up with ideas, or how you design characters. But small things, too, like what tools you use for drawing, how you balance between traditional and digital art, and how you decide what color to use for your unique and beautiful line art.

I want to be more specific so you can answer, but the question in my head is too vague and broad for me to be specific about it. So . . . here are some subquestions of my question, I guess! Maybe that helps?

Sorry this is so weird, and thank you, your art is amazing

first of all, thank you so much <3

and yes, this is far more answerable! i hope i can satiate some of your hunger for insight without writing a whole book.

HOW DO I COME UP WITH IDEAS?

this is obviously going to be very different for everyone. i very rarely have to dig for ideas or sit down and brainstorm, unless of course i am trying to achieve something very specific, like fulfill art contest criteria or working on a commission. my brain is very visually wired, so a lot of my ideas literally just pop up in my head (i know of several artists with aphantasia - some people don't have any visuals in their head at all and I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THAT'S LIKE AND I AM IN AWE OF THESE ARTISTS), sometimes i see a character or character design and im like HNNNG i need to draw them, or i just... have a concept i really want to Exist and i'm going to figure out how.

my biggest problem is that often, when i get an idea i want to DRAW IT, NOW NOW NOWNOWNOW, and that's just Not Feasible. sometimes because i'm Literally In Bed, sometimes because i have too many things i need to do or draw first... but i need to clear up space in my head, because my Urge To Draw will be like, beeping and whirring until i satisfy it... so i write it down on my TO DRAW-list! it's a real list that exists on my phone and i have to use it frequently. if i keep scrolling down i start finding weird notes that i have NO idea are supposed to mean anymore, but that's fine. i can't satisfy every Art Urge. sometimes i need to let them pass.

HOW DO I DESIGN CHARACTERS?

this one might vary a bit, but it can often be boiled down to "i sketch around until i figure something that Works." many of my characters, especially my older characters, became characters by accident when i kept drawing them over and over and i was like Ah I Like Drawing You... You Exist Now. that's how sparrow spellcaster happened, at the very least. this could happen because i had school and i would focus in school by doodling/sketching while listening to class. since i no longer go to school, pretty much all of my new characters are far more intentional. Timian and Vinta specifically exist as a result of a "favourite character fusion" challenge, and a lot of iphimery characters started with a Purpose rather than just harnessing the vibe of something i drew multiple times without thinking.

it helps to write down elements or tropes i want to include, like "sturdy-looking" or "VILLAIN OF EVIL SCARY MAGICS but it's a little girl and the dark magic is bright lightning and not shadows" or something. it can vary from a tiny visual detail to their role in the story. whatever i want to Achieve. my Intent. because my brain works so visually, i just really need to sketch somethign repeatedly until i nail it and can be like Yes That's It.

sketchbooks look a little messy but that’s what they’re for.

WHAT TOOLS DO I USE

for digital art, i’m currently using an ipad pro and procreate. i use a lot of the brushes that came installed, like Mercury is my primary lineart brush, and Moorilla is my primary sketching brush, but i also buy a lot of custom brushes on the hunt for More Delicious Textures (DAUB has a lot of good ones, especially if you want some that imitate traditional art). i have also used Huion and XP-pen tablets and generally recommend them, as well as clip studio paint as an art program (i love it very much and if it wasn’t subscription-based on ipad i would still be using it).

for traditional art, mostly just whatever sketchbook i have + my trusty mechanical pencil. i mean i have two: one with softer lead (it comes out darker) and 0,7 mm thickness, and one that’s 0,5 and harder lead for more light sketching, or if i’m going to line it with ink.

i also have a trusty pentel brush pen that i love DEARLY and feel bad for not having used in a while for reasons i will get to.

when i work on calendar pieces traditionally, i like to draw lines with ink - i use a dip pen with exchangeable nibs - and then color with watercolors. i have several sets because they’re all slightly different and i want the Range.

i sometimes travel with a little sketchbook in my bag and an assortment of pens, so that i can sketch Anytime, Anywhere. i think doodling with a pen can be very useful because you gotta become comfortable with the mistakes and imperfections and keep going anyway. if i doodle at work that’s the tools i have -  regular ball pens and a bunch of paper lying around.

HOW DO I BALANCE BETWEEN DIGITAL AND TRADITIONAL ART?

currently, i... don’t, really. it was easier when i had school, and i would just doodle freely and then maybe use some of my sketches as thumbnails or concept ideas. it’s harder now that i need to intentionally sit down with my sketchbook, and tbh... the ipad works very well for sketching. it’s so CONVENIENT and i have WORK all the time and my time to create art has become much more limited than it was. i miss going to my weirdo art high school where we would try out a whole bunch of different tools and methods. sure, yes, i had to paint with Acrylics My Beloathed, but getting to play around in different mediums is VERY valuable.

i genuinely want to be able to make more time and space for non-digital art again, but i just don’t have the ability to right now. it’s also different now that i’ve moved away from my parent’s place - i used to have an enormous desk and my mother has a large collection of art tools and there was a lot more storage space for whatever i created. digital art is very convenient and very accessible. ah well!

HOW DO I DECIDE ON THE COLOR FOR MY LINEART?

i usually line in black or a very dark color, and when i’m done coloring + shading i might play around with the colors and see what works. if you lock the layer you can just throw all the spaghetti at the wall you want. i decide on whatever fits the piece. i tend to be pretty fast and loose about it too, sometimes you can probably spot parts of my lineart that have slightly mismatchy color, but it’s like... done is better than perfect! i don’t have the energy to overlook every single pixel of my piece or else i would drive myself utterly mad.

HOPE THIS ANSWERS ANYTHING AT ALL!! THANKS FOR ASKING!!!

[icollectyoursins]

Kishibe Rohan x Reader SFW + NSFW

Anon said: “Consider Rohan sfw and nsfw hcs? And in nsfw Rohan could be a top,,? Prrtty pleade hhh, since there is only one work of Rohan ;;”

I hope these are good, not too familiar with Rohan, so I hope you like it!

Wanna know what I’m willing to write? Rules here!

Have a character, but no idea? Prompt list here!

Looking for more? Master post here!

WARNINGS: Making out, stands used in inappropriate ways, fingering, voyeurism, dildos, fucking machines, spanking, hand jobs, blow jobs, oral, face fucking, cock warming, nipple play, nude modelling. 

Word Counts: 2201

SFW

Rohan is a jackass who cares. In the beginning, he’s very private and stand-offish, but he does warm up to you eventually, though he’s still nicer in private than he is in public. He claims this is because he’s a “celebrity” and can’t have his fans see you too close together yada, yada. It’s bullshit and you know it, but you have the feeling it’s because he’s not used to people being close to him. 

Yes, he does have a binder dedicated to paintings, drawings, sketches, etc. all for you. Some are a little on the artistically lewd side, but most of them are of your hands holding something or your smile, your face and shoulders. Some of them he asked you to model for, others he quickly sketched down while you weren’t paying attention and then finished later.

When he’s not holed up inside, he enjoys walking down to either parts of Morioh where he can people watch or down to the park where he can study wildlife (and maybe draw you playing with ducks). 

You are literally never bored in his house. He has every book under the earth and so many loose painting supplies that he painfully lets you use to fool around. (Though let’s be honest, He likes that you take an interest in his job and would be more than happy to give you tips.)

You know what? Rohan is a backseat artist. He watches every stroke you make over your shoulder and tells you maybe you should move the hand this way to make it more natural or add some light shading here to make it dynamic. It may come off as a little pretentious at first, but if you keep with it, he’ll notice the improvement and (occasionally) tell you how good you’re doing while being a total blushing mess.

    You sat in the window seat, knees up with your back against the wall. Resting on your thighs was a sketchbook. Currently, you were just idly drawing lines of shading onto a face. Rohan himself was also busy colouring in his most recent page, though every now and then he would catch himself looking up at your silhouette, lit up by the light in some kind of halo effect.

     Finally, he caved in to his curiosity. Setting down his pencils, he strode over to you. You didn’t notice until his face manifested itself over your shoulder. Startled, you jumped, causing your pencil to make a long line on your artwork. 

     “Jesus, warn me next time.” You said, grabbing your eraser.

     “Have you been struggling with the nose?” He completely ignores you, still staring at your drawing. The paper was clearly marked up by the eraser with deeper marks from where the pencil was.

     “Yeah, actually. It’s either too big or too small. Kind of just gave up.” You carefully tried to erase the long line but wound up taking away parts that you were actually happy with.

     “Be more gentle with the pencil, it’ll make it easier to erase.” He suggested with a monotone.

     “I tried-”

     “And then you got frustrated and pushed harder. I admire your persistence, however, if something isn’t to your liking, walk away and come back. Remember to look at the picture as a whole, not just the nose.” You rolled your eyes, gently tossing your pencil onto the window seat. As much as you wanted to appreciate the advice, you had heard it all before. You were getting sick of it, frankly.

     Rohan took note of your agitation, studying your face carefully. “You’ve improved, though!” You looked up, a little shocked. What? “The eyes are well done and your shading is very even. Good job.” 

     What? Your cheeks grew hot. That was the first bit of praise you had heard from him. About your drawing, at least. He looked down into your eyes, then felt his own face getting hot. He turned away. “Go take a break. I’ll help you when you get back in an hour. I’ll be timing you, don’t be late.”

Like I have said, he’s not overly fond of affection in public (in the beginning), but he can’t deny that holding your hand or feeling you on his arm makes him feel pretty good. The first few times, he’s internally a mess, though he won’t show anything other than a light tint of blush on his cheeks. But when he’s relaxing at home, he enjoys having you under his arm, leaning against him or with one of your heads in the other’s lap. He’s not used to people and even less so used to affection, but can be worked up to being more comfortable with stuff like kissing in front of the Morioh gang and the like.

When he’s comfortable, he is so cocky. Like, boarder line makes out with you in front of literally anyone just to prove you’re his S/O. This always makes you blush so much (unless you’re into that.) More often than not, he’ll have an arm around your shoulders, hand in pocket, looking so smug and proud and cool. 

Pet names? He can either go one of two ways, depending on his mood. Either it’s just your name or babe OR it is every teasing name under the sun. Oh, darling can you do this for me? Oh, baby, oh, honey, oh, my love, oh, my flower. It’s usually used to get something from you or to get you to do something a little out of the box.

I can see Rohan as being the kind of person who is very strict about his bath time and hates when people interrupt him. On the rare occasion, he’ll let you in with him with the promise of either massaging him or something else *wink, wink*

NSFW (Dominant specifically)

Rohan literally does not shut up during sex. Praise, degradation, mocking, you name it! As a writer and an artist, he knows how to stitch words together in a masterful way that never fails to make you hot in the face.

Uh, yeah. He’s used Heaven’s Door on you before. Did he do it to learn your kinks? Maybe to put some kind of loose control over you in certain situations? Looking for people you find attractive for potential erm... art inspiration (voyeurism)? The world will never know.

Staying-on brand with HD, he absolutely uses it to learn everything that you enjoy in the bedroom. He knows how to make you squirm, where to push to make you scream, how to make you beg. He knows everything.

Particularly enjoys using this “power” to finger you, pressing into every sweet spot (that he made more sensitive with HD), licking over the edges of your hole in a way that just makes you dumb (either hole, not picky!)

     A delicate finger was trailed up your twitching hole, making you shiver. Rohan had already stretched you open enough for it to easily slip in again. You were so sensitive from being teased over and over again, but with no relief that you cried out, tears threatening to burst forward.

     He curled his finger up into a particularly sensitive bundle of nerves, slowly pushing into it more. You groaned and whined, blabbering out his name along with various ways to beg. He shushed you carelessly, sounding annoyed by your desperation. God, you wish you could move! You would give anything to be impaled by him right now. Or anything for that matter.

     He removed the digit quickly, then promptly smacked your ass with a flat hand.

     “Quiet.” You had no choice but to listen to him, involuntarily shutting your mouth and stifling your whimpers. “If you want something, be polite about it. Do you know how to be polite?”

     You nodded your head, a single tear trailed down your cheek. Your hole was teased again, repeating the same process as before. Rohan was such an asshole, but god if you didn’t love it.

If you have established a relationship where he has complete control over everything you say or do, he will abuse it so much. Just, tells you to sit still, turns on a wand or vibrator and just tortures you to the point of tears. You can talk, he didn’t take that away (mostly because he wants to hear you beg), but the position he put you in on top of the order. It’s too much for you. 

He’ll do the same with a dildo, a fucking machine, his own dick, does not matter! Once you give him that power, RIP to your organs.

Alright, now. Voyeurism. This man is a freak and does not try to hide it when it’s under the guise of “art.” Again, if established, he will hire random people to do whatever he wants to you. If you’re okay with it, he’ll record it for later research. 

Rohan is a weird jealous type, so he checks out every person you meet and makes sure they’re perfect (ie. not competition and someone you’ll enjoy). Very rarely does he let you pick out the people. Like I said, he’s a weird jealous type. Likes to see you with other people, but not with other people, you know?

There is only one person who he considers competition that he wants you to fuck at least once and it’s Jotaro. Are we surprised? No. Dude is built like a god and has the goods to match. Even Rohan can’t deny it. He would probably want to join in as well, but Jotaro would never do anything like that.

Mmmm, punishments for being bratty? Ooooh, yes. Smack my ass like a drum! Makes you count, absolutely. If he’s in a bitchy, lazy mood he’ll use a paddle or something like that, other than that, he uses his hands. 

As you’ve probably surmised, he likes having control over you in the bedroom, so it’s no surprise he also enjoys tying you up and has a particular fondness for swings where he’ll hang you up and tease you until you can barely walk. 

I mentioned baths in the SFW section, now let me elaborate. Doesn’t like sex in the bath, he hates when the water gets everywhere, but loves when you worship him while scrubbing him down and will allow you to work him up with a light hand job. This usually leads to a blowjob of some kind whether it’s gentle or rough.

Speaking of! His favourite part of sex is probably oral. From sucking bruises into each other’s necks, rough kissing, right down to holding you against the wall and choking you with his dick. Or a dildo, if he wants something a little more adventurous like mirror sex with him taking you from behind and making you watch yourself choke over and over again.

Cock warming is only ever used as punishment for being too needy, but he will keep you in his lap until you’re in tears. He is absurdly patient when it comes to sex.

     You whined, grinding yourself onto Rohan’s dick. He chuckled before letting out a theatrical sigh. Your grip on his shoulders got harder and you buried your face into his neck more.

     “What’s wrong, (Y/N)?” He trailed a soft, teasing hand up your thigh. “You wanted attention, yes? Then, why are you complaining? Now, up, I need another look at my reference.”

     You sighed, tired and riled up at the same time. With new vigour, you sat up, leaning back to show your artist his latest obsession. He hummed in appreciation, taking a minute to admire his muse before licking a warm stripe up your sternum making you gasp. He stopped, giving you a look of warning.

     “Don’t move.” You gave him a curt nod, trying your best to follow your command while he returned his tongue to your chest, exploring your skin’s taste. He flicked over your nipple with the tip, testing your resolve before wrapping his lips around it, sucking harshly. A moan fought its way through your throat as he became more feverous with his suckling. 

     Rohan hummed with you, theatrically mulling over the saltiness, then switching to the next one. Satisfied with the redness around your nipples, he pulls back, looking you over once again. A lightbulb seems to go off in his head and he reaches for his sketchbook which only made his cock shift inside you, rubbing against your walls in a delightfully painful way.

     “Rohan-sensei,” you moaned out. Admittedly, you didn’t like calling him that, but he insisted you call him sensei during times like this. 

     “Stop moving, you’re ruining the picture,” he chided. “Go back to the way you were, darling.” He leaned back, rolling his hips into you to punctuate his words as well as tease you. 

Model nude for him. Whether you like it or not, he will ask you to do it and, if he’s in a sexy mood, you will be asked to do uncomfortable positions that will definitely leave you sore the next day. “It highlights how the muscles work for a new character I’m drawing” or so he says. Other than that, he’ll just let you pick somewhere comfortable and sexy to lie down. 

[sevlgi]

patient

requested: yes

group: mamamoo

pairing: hwasa x fem!reader

genre: fluff

contents: tattoo artist!hwasa, flustered!reader [15/33]

warnings: none

synopsis: It’s hard for you to be patient about your next tattoo session when your artist is so damn gorgeous.

a/n: um??? I love tattoo aus???? also don’t come at me for the name, I’m not creative

word count: 1.9k

“Elegant Chaos.”

You test the name out on your tongue, staring up at the slightly grimy neon sign of the shop. The entire front is one-way glass, so all you can see is your own reflection and the ones of the people bustling around you.

Before you can make up a decision to open the door to the store or not, someone else does; a pretty brunette woman steps out and smiles at you, crazy beautiful with full lips and crescent-eyes. “Hi. Can I help you?”

“Uh, yeah.” You show her the printed-out address your friend sent you and step a bit closer. “Is this a tattoo shop? I searched the address up but nothing resulted, I was referred by a friend.”

She barely takes a glance at the address before flashing another bright grin. “Oh, yep! This is our tattoo shop, we opened a couple months ago. It’s weird that we’re still not showing up, but oh, well. Want to come in?”

You barely register her quick words but step into the shop after her, the smell of rubbing alcohol, paper, and perfume vaguely stinging your nose. “I’m Solar, the receptionist,” she introduces, walking behind what you presume to be her desk. Out front, some teenagers talk quietly, a tall, dark-haired boy with a sleeve sipping at a banana milk.

“Cool. Uh, I’m Y/N. I don’t have an appointment, is that okay?”

Solar nods, tapping at her phone. “Sure. Jungkook over there is just waiting for Byul to finish her other client, and Wheein is prepping to pierce the kids. Hwasa’s our best artist, anyway, does that sound good?”

Her question startles you from staring at the intricate sketches taped all over the walls, the same 3 signatures stamped everywhere. “What?”

She laughs, though it’s not rude. “We have one artist left, Hwasa, but since you’re referred, you probably don’t have someone in mind, right? You can go to see her now, she’s free.”

“Great. Do I just...?” At Solar’s nod, you walk past her and into the back. The studio’s quite small, to be honest; there are 4 stations, two of them occupied. One of them, who you guess is Byul, is tattooing an elderly man, her sleeves rolled up to reveal the art on her bicep. 

The second, probably Wheein, is wiping down her tools, and she’s the first to notice you. “Hi!” she grins, turning the music blasting from the radio down with her ungloved hand. “Can I help you?”

“Yeah. Solar mentioned that I should come find Hwasa,” you explain, eyes widening at the complicated art being tattooed on the elderly man. “Are you...?”

“No, I’m Wheein.” Ah, so you were right. “This is Byul, she’s a bit preoccupied,” Wheein smiles, dimples poking into her cheeks. “I’ll get Hye- sorry, Hwasa for you.”

She hurries out to the back, and you can hear talking through the open door, before she comes back, the woman you presume to be Hwasa behind her.

Instantly, you’re starstruck; she’s stunning in a way that’s completely unique, long dark hair and tanned skin contrasting beautifully. The only makeup she wears is a bold red lipstick, her tank top showing the delicate tattoos she has. “Hey, I’m Hwasa,” she greets, sticking her hand out. Her nails are long, too.

“Y/N.” You accept the handshake, trying not to stare. “Uh, Solar said you were free for a consultation?”

“Yeah.” She sits at one of the free stations, clearing the things scattered on the table. “So, what’re you looking for? Do you already have a design chosen or am I freehanding?”

You fumble in your bag for a piece of paper, sliding it over to Hwasa. “Um, this is just something my friend drew up for me. I want it pretty small, on my forearm.”

The dark-haired woman shrugs, unfolding the paper. “I could do that. Is this your first tattoo?”

Nodding, you watch as Hwasa taps her long, red-painted nails on the desk. “Okay. Is this part of a sleeve or by itself?”

“Uh, how long would each one take?” To be honest, you have no idea why you said that; you didn’t consider a sleeve at all, though you considered multiple tattoos or a large one. There’s just something about the other woman that makes it impossible for you to think.

She considers the question before answering, “Depends on the size and how many small ones you want to work in for the sleeve, but I’d recommend a separate session for each small square, so maybe 8 or 10. I’ll be done with this in less than 30 minutes, though, if it’s just the one.”

To be honest, the only thing causing you to consider a sleeve is getting to see Hwasa again, and you curse your own attraction to her when you blurt, “Maybe a sleeve? I have to think about the other ones I want to work in, though.”

“Okay. I can just do the one today, and we can schedule another day for you to come in and design the whole thing,” she offers, picking the sketch up. “I’ll go make this into a stencil, then.”

“Sure.”

When she takes the sketch and walks to the back room, you slump down in the chair and pivot to look at the others. You quickly realize how long you were talking with Hwasa; Byul is already working on the coconut-haired boy, and Wheein is already done with the teenagers.

She seems to be the outgoing type, and waves at you while sanitizing her needles and packing her kit up again. “So, how did it go? Are you going to start today?”

“I am, yep. You’re already done with the kids?”

Wheein nods, placing the studs back into their cases. “Yep. They just wanted more lobe piercings, it’s really easy. I’m a tattoo artist, too, but I think the kids like me more. Except for Jungkook over here, they think Byul’s intimidating.”

“I’m not!” the other woman protests, hands still steady as she works on the boy. Her voice is deeper than you’d expect. “You literally call me a hamster.”

Flapping a hand, Wheein flashes you her dimples again. “So, what do you think of Hwasa?”

“Huh?” you blink, brain basically short-circuiting. “Uh, she’s a good artist? I saw some of her sketches, yours too; you’re all really talented.”

“No, no, that’s not what I mean. Wait, you’re not straight, are you?” she narrows her eyes at you, scanning you from head to toe. “Maybe my sense is broken, I didn’t peg you for a...”

“I’m not. Straight. I’m a lesbian.” Your cheeks burn to say it aloud, though nobody really reacts, not even Jungkook. “Are you?”

Wheein shrugs, “I mean, I’m attracted to women. All 4 of us are- Hyejin, Byul, Yongsun. Solar, to you. And we make sure everyone who comes in is accepting, we won’t serve bigots.”

For whatever reason, you’re almost relieved to hear that Hwasa’s also attracted to women in some sense, even though it doesn’t necessarily mean that she’s attracted to you. “Oh. That’s cool.”

“Yeah. So, is it just one tattoo or a sleeve?” Her knowing smile puts you off a bit; how did she figure it out? “A lot of girls who come in here change their original idea because of Hyejin-ah. You’re obviously attracted to her, to, so it’s no surprise.”

“Is it really that obvious?” you groan, surprising yourself with how open you’re being about it. “Do you think she knows?”

“Probably,” Wheein giggles, nodding when Solar pokes her head in the studio to tell her something. “Anyway. I’ve got to go, good luck!”

She waves as she leaves, the only noise left in the studio being the quiet music and Jungkook’s quiet talking. He seems just as awkward as you are, lifting his free hand in a half wave.

You’re saved by Hwasa returning with a stencil. “Here. Does that look good?”

She’s modified the original design just the tiniest bit, making the lines a little bit darker and the shading simpler, and it looks... “Perfect.” You grin, a weight on your chest lifted by your conversation with Wheein. “Should we start?”

“Sure.” She brings you over to one of the actual tattoo stations, the seat already smelling sanitized. You can barely listen as she explains what the process will be like- cleaning, the actual tattooing, pain; you finally come to when she asks, “Are you ready?”

“I... yeah. I am.”

It’s quiet until the buzzing of the tattoo gun brings you to life, the tiniest bit of fear sour on your tongue. Hwasa looks concentrated as she peels the stencil off, not exactly reassuring, either. “So. Is there a meaning behind this?”

“Uh, not really. Are there meanings behind yours?” You gasp when the needle first touches your skin, the cold wipe taking off excess ink.

“I have some matching tattoos with Wheein,” Hwasa explains, smiling at the mention of the other girl. “Uh, one is Maria, my Christian name. Wheein has more, but all of us have some kind of meaning behind ours. It’s not bad to have no meaning, though.”

You wince as she continues with the linework, slowly getting used to the pain. “Are you and Wheein...”

She looks up, raising an eyebrow. “Together? No, we’re best friends. I haven’t been with someone in a few years.”

“What’s stopping you?”

Hwasa laughs, wiping your arm once again. “Nothing, I guess. I’m just patient enough to wait for the right person.”

“Patient. Right.”

Conversation flows smoothly, mostly light topics. You learn each other’s ages, and you’re told to call Hwasa ‘Hyejin’ instead. You learn when she got her first tattoo, and when she learned to tattoo others. The more you talk, the more drawn in you are, fascinated by her every word.

The half an hour is over far too fast. “Done,” she announces, smiling as she turns off her gun. “Take a look.”

It looks gorgeous, as expected, though Hwasa plays off your barrage of compliments. “Uh, should I pay now?”

She shrugs, placing saran wrap over your arm. “We’ll go talk with Solar about that, she’s better with pricing than I am. But it probably won’t be much.”

“What? Why?” you frown, examining the tattoo. Usually, discounts only happen when something goes wrong, or you have a coupon. You’re pretty sure neither of those things apply.

Hwasa pauses, turning to send you a small smirk. “Well, the cute ones usually pay less.”

Your heart practically stops, though you force yourself to walk to the front with her. “Besides, you’re probably coming back again soon, right?”

“Oh! Uh, yeah. I think so. When will that be? The next session, I mean.”

She frowns, tapping at the tablet Solar hands her. “You can come in as soon as you’re free to design it, if you want, but you have to wait a bit for the next session, especially if you’re doing the things close together. If you want, I can give you my number.”

At your stricken expression, Hwasa’s lips curve into a knowing smile. “So you can send me ideas, for the sleeve.”

“Ah, of course.” Your cheeks burn as you take out your cash, counting out a surprisingly small amount. “That sounds good. I guess I’ll just have to be patient, then.”

“I guess so. Call me, Y/N,” she smiles, handing your phone back with a new contact in.

Being patient is going to be so damn hard. 

[chimeowrical]

Dear Chimeowrical, how does one draw faces and hands???

Oh man, that’s a pretty tough one just because I rarely follow a super specific set of steps? It definitely depends on what I’m working on, the angles, the character, etc, but here’s basically how I operate I guess! I’m 100% not an art teacher and it’s been upwards of 5 years since I’ve done any actual guided art class so my fundamentals are lacking lol. Also the BEST art tip is to always always always use references. You might think you know what a thing looks like, but reference > memory. So I’m constantly using refs.

I’ll do hands first bc they’re simpler. I start off with a very rough shape that’s usually about the length from the bend of the wrist to the middle of the fingers. The shape usually depends on the context within the sketch, but it’s kind of a placeholder while I’m roughing something out. Then, unless the hand is at like a super weird specific angle, I almost always draw the line from the wrist to the tip of the pointer finger, joints included. That finger usually “leads” and influences where the other fingers fall. From there I use that to guage the rest and basically connect the joints of each finger, and round off the tips!

Faces are... somewhat similar. The guidelines I use are pretty superficial, but the circle and ‘t’ shape just kind of show me what angle the face will be at so I can keep it in mind. Then I rough out very simple shapes - little lines for the brows, a shadow for the nose, and a couple of lines for the jaw. Then I just fill in those spaces.

My process is really a combo of like... reference and “mental math” . Really the important things to remember are that 1. You are learning, be patient with yourself and celebrate everything you make, even when it’s hard to. 2. References are so helpful, and not just photos - it’s great to look at other artists’ work and learn from that! 3. Practice is the only way to really improve, you can study all day long but, baby, you gotta put pen to paper sometimes and just make! Even if you think it’s ugly or “bad” (every artist struggles with this), you’re still creating things and that’s pretty amazing.

[artificialqueens]

Fool for You (Crygi) - Frankenvenus

After realising she has fallen for her straight best friend, Crystal’s therapist recommends she write her crush love letters. So instead of communicating her feelings, she scribbles then down and slips them into Gigi Goode’s locker.

A/N~ I hope you like this cause it took forever. I finished it super late at night and I did read through it twice but I apologise for any errors.

Crystal stormed her way into her therapist’s office, throwing herself onto the pink sofa that she sat and rambled on for an hour and a half every week. Her therapist looked at her bemused as the blue-haired girl uttered the words, “I’m in love with my best friend.”

Her therapist, Widow, huffed out a sigh, placing her clipboard down on the coffee table in front and pushing her glasses slightly down her nose, “Well. That’s a common issue for young queer folks like yourself.”

Crystal groaned and rolled over, displaying her puffy eyes and messed up bangs, “But I thought I was immune to it.”

Widow chuckled slightly and leaned towards where Crystal lay, brushing her hair from where it stuck itself in her lip gloss, “Do you need to rant to me about it? You know that’s why I’m here, sweetie; to listen.”

The young girl groaned again before sitting up, straightening her back and recounting the events of her day.

It had started off a normal Thursday. On Thursdays, she would usually peddle to her best friend Gigi’s house before school began so they could scribble down fake absence notes for phys ed, then Gigi would hop on the back of Crystal’s bike and they’d cycle the last half mile to their high school. It was routine for them. Never weird, never crossing any lines. It had always been the two of them, best friends, since middle school. So when things shifted, it took Crystal by surprise.

“I wanna do something different today instead of just sitting in the library until Phys Ed ends. I’m sick of the librarian shutting us up. We literally aren’t even loud,” - Gigi had said, fixing her dirty blonde ponytail in the school bathroom mirror after the bike ride messed it up.

Crystal had agreed with her, before asking her if she wanted to try something new. Although Gigi was her best friend, she hung out with the stoners whilst Gigi hung out with the high-fashion Instagram girls. The dirty blonde had never tried weed, and Crystal never offered - but today she did, and Gigi was eager.

The two of them snuck to the abandoned bike shed at the back of the school, covered in ivy with smashed windows. It was a spot that only Crystal and her friends Daya, Daegen, Lux and Tiff knew, so Gigi was curious to see it.

“This is so cool,” Gigi had gaped, finding a spot in the corner while her friend rolled her a joint. Crystal had to assure her multiple times that they wouldn’t get caught, but Gigi didn’t shut up until the sizzling rice paper was placed in her mouth. The older girl talked her through how to inhale it properly, and soon enough Gigi was coughing the smoke into the air.

“Can you feel it in your chest?” Crystal had asked, and when Gigi nodded, she said, “Good. That’s how you know it worked.”

They sat there, minds foggy, trying to hold conversation despite their thought process and immediate short term memory being cut off every few seconds. At some point, their pinkies intertwined, followed by the rest of their fingers. And then, Gigi was nestling her forehead into the crook of Crystal’s neck. That’s when it all tumbled down on the latter.

The contrasting feeling of the coldness from Gigi’s skin against her own warm, buzzing skin sent jolts of emotion through her, and the gentle brush of Gigi’s wavy locks against her jaw caused her heart to squeeze itself in a way that was unfamiliar to her. It didn’t seem too serious to Crystal whilst she was still in her high, but when the effects of the weed began to fade by fifth period, the sudden feeling of need for her best friend’s touch remained in place.

Her mind kept travelling elsewhere during fifth and sixth period, which happened to be double Spanish. Jaida had to pinch her multiple times, bringing her back down to Earth. Jaida didn’t question Crystal’s behaviour too much though, because the latter wasn’t usually focused in Spanish class anyway, and that’s why she was failing.

Gigi had debate team practice after school on Thursdays, so instead of going home together the same way they would travel to school, Crystal biked alone. She had her earplugs in, blasting Clairo like usual and wondering what the hell it was that she felt today. It wasn’t until ‘Sofia’ by Clairo came on did everything click in her mind. Something about the lyrics ‘Standing here alone now, think that we can drive around, I just wanna say how I love you with your hair down’ made her realise that oh, she wanted to be able to call Gigi her own, and not just platonically. Then she almost crashed her bike.

She swerved into a fire hydrant, gratified that her bike sported thick mountain bike wheels to soften the hit. Luckily, she didn’t fall off - she just got a fright. She decided to walk her bike the rest of the way home, which thankfully wasn’t far.

When she reached home, she spread herself across her bed and allowed herself to make connections that she should’ve made before. Why else could she never take her eyes off Gigi’s plump lips? Why else did people at school assume they were a couple because they were so touchy all the time? Why else did she feel such tremendous jealousy whenever Gigi showed even the tiniest bit of romantic fondness towards someone that wasn’t her.

Her mom knocked on her door, reminding her that she had her therapy appointment in an hour, and that led back to the present.

“That seems like quite the epiphany,” Widow smiled warmly, passing Crystal a tissue box when tears began to spill over, “Normally falling for a long-term best friend is something that you realise over time, but not for you apparently.”

“I think maybe I’m just an oblivious fuck,” Crystal sniffled. “But even if I realised it today, years ago, or tens of years from now, she still wouldn’t like me back.”

“Well, I’m not your friend’s therapist, but we can’t be so quick to assume.”

“Once you see the girl, you’ll know. She’s a hardcore ten. I’m a five, at best.”

“Crystal, remember what we went over…” Widow began, and the blue-haired girl finished the sentence.

“…Instead of self-deprecation, tell yourself you’re the best person ever, no matter whether you believe it or not - yeah, I get it,” Crystal rolled her eyes, “It’s just hard when you know it’s not true.”

“Well, I have a little tip I give my clients when they’re in a similar situation to you. The whole unrequited love thing,” the older woman got up from her seat and walked towards a cabinet, pulling out a packet of fresh, plain envelopes, “I usually tell them to write their crush love notes. It’s up to them whether they send them or not, or whether it’s anonymous or not, but they can be very therapeutic when needing to express bottled up emotion. Do you see where I’m coming from?”

Crystal raised a brow and tilted her head to the side slightly, the hint of a smile on her lips. She actually didn’t mind the idea.

“That’s actually super cute,” she giggled, taking the stack of envelopes from her therapist, “Thank you.”

.

As soon as Crystal got home, she sprinted to her room and grabbed an old notebook from the back of her stationery drawer. It was a plain A5 paper notebook, but spread across each page was a ginormous red opaque One Direction logo. Crystal had got it for Christmas about a decade ago, but it had only been used a handful of times for random sketches and one draft of a Louis Tomlinson and Harry Styles fanfiction.

She grabbed an ink fine-liner from her art pot which she would normally use for her pointillism artwork and began the first letter.

You don’t know who I am. Well, you do but like, not who is writing this. I hope you aren’t scared or anything - cause that’s the last thing I wanna do. I promise I’m not a freak. Well, I sorta look like one but, I know you aren’t one to be bothered by that kind of thing. It’s beautiful, you know. The way people look at you and assume you’ll hate them for who they are cause you’re so pretty and popular, but then you’re just as wonderful on the outside as you are within. That look on your face when you meet a new person drives me nuts. The way you look like you’ve swallowed the sun. Radiant. Always.

Sometimes I wish I could just tell you how I feel about you to your face, but I think you might faint out of disgust. You do that a lot. I sound like a stalker, but I promise I’m not. I think I’m just smitten.

She finished the letter, reading it over to make sure her handwriting looked unrecognisable. Although Gigi wasn’t the most observant person, she and Crystal were so familiar with each other that she was bound to notice her unique handwriting. She also made sure to spray it with an old perfume that she never wore, so Gigi wouldn’t connect their scents. Gigi always made comments about how she loved Crystal’s perfume, so the blue-haired girl had to take precautions. Her strong scent of cocoa and vanilla was bound to rub off on the paper, so she sprayed it with a men’s cologne that she had likely shoplifted years prior, spraying it onto the paper from a distance.

Although Widow had given her the option not to post the letters, Crystal felt like the weight of her crush wouldn’t be eased unless she actually posted it. So, she placed it into the envelope and slipped it into Gigi’s locker the next day at school when the blonde wasn’t around, her heart pounding in her ears with anticipation and verve.

She sat through her first class of the day, social studies with Daya, desperately trying to take her mind off the painful wait. Daya ranted to her about dinosaurs and how everyone’s perception of how they looked was wrong, but Crystal hardly paid attention. She would nod every so often, just so Daya wasn’t insulted, but she wasn’t really in the conversation.

After social studies, she shared a free period with Gigi. She made her way to their meeting spot in the library after the bell dismissed them from their first period, and sooner than she would’ve liked, Gigi was marching across the library towards her with the smuggest grin on her face.

“Oh my God Crystal Elizabeth you will never guess what I just found in my locker,” she squealed as quietly as possible, sliding into the seat opposite Crystal’s.

“What?” Crystal raised a brow, her mouth full of skittles. Now here was the hardest part - pretending to be shocked.

Gigi reached into her blazer pocket and pushed the familiar envelope towards the older girl, who plastered a confused look on her face. The dirty blonde gestured for her to open it, so she complied. She pulled out the letter that was already likely covered in her own fingerprints and unfolded it with a faux-expression of excitement.

“What the fuck is this?” she chuckled, trying to suppress the shake in her fingers as she held the letter.

“A letter. From a secret admirer,” Gigi beamed, placing her beautiful shaped chin into her palm and flashing her angelic white teeth. Wow, Crystal was more whipped than she thought.

“This is so dumb,” she lied blatantly, and to her surprise, Gigi frowned.

“You think so? I think it’s so sweet. And shit… whoever wrote it has a way with words,” she exhaled, tugging her plump, peachy lower lip between her teeth.

Crystal’s breathing hitched and she felt her skin redden. She assumed Gigi would find it painfully corny, but it seemed like she felt the opposite. The blonde promptly took the letter back from Crystal’s grasp, taking a look at it once more. The older girl wished she was imagining the blush that began to cover Gigi’s face, but it was definitely there.

“I hope they write again. I wanna play Nancy Drew,” Gigi smiled sheepishly, taking Crystal’s hand suddenly, “Will you help me, you know, try and crack the code?”

“Sure!”

Fuck. Crystal felt like Hannah Montana.

.

They spent Saturday together, drinking on Crystal’s roof and gossiping about their own respective friend groups, however, the conversation kept moving back towards the letter. Gigi was conflicted on whether or not she knew the person, but her repetitive use of he and him pronouns when she referred to the secret admirer caused Crystal’s blood to simmer.

When Gigi left the next morning after spending the night on Crystal’s couch, the blue-haired girl was quick to begin her second letter.

I hope these letters haven’t made you uncomfortable in any way. The look on your face when you read it tells me they haven’t though. What I want to tell you though, is that I’m not what you think. I hate to disappoint you, but I’m not a boy. I’m a girl. I don’t know if you like girls. If not; I’m sorry, but if you do; so do I. I like you a lot. All I want is to make you smile.

She spent Sunday at the skatepark, smoking with Daya, Daegen, Lux and Tiff, before slipping the note into Gigi’s locker first thing on Monday morning. The two of them, as well as Gigi’s friends Nicky and Jaida, all shared music class first period of Mondays. Whilst Crystal was pulling her viola out of its case, Gigi suddenly began dangling the envelope in front of her nose.

“Another one!” Gigi grinned, her voice cracking with adorable excitement. She took a seat beside Crystal and opened it. “I haven’t read it yet.”

Crystal watched her friend’s face with anticipation whilst she read the letter aloud, quiet enough that surrounding people wouldn’t hear. Gigi’s eyes widened as she read it over, and her grin faltered into an unreadable expression.

“What does it say?” Crystal questioned nervously.

“The person who wrote it isn’t a guy,” Gigi sighed, scratching the top of her head, “It’s a girl.”

The tanned girl pursed her lips, not knowing what to say next.

“Wow, uh. So… what do you think about that then?” she queried stupidly.

“About what?”

“You know… a girl liking you…”

The blonde crossed her legs and looked away from Crystal, “A pair of tits isn’t gonna stop me from loving this girls way of words. The anonymity is sexy. I should’ve known a man wouldn’t have the mental capacity to do something so romantic.”

This could not be real. Crystal felt like she was lucid dreaming.

“So you like… girls?” she pressed.

Gigi turned to her with a glint in her eye, “No gender or sex will stop me from wanting to kiss someone pretty.”

Oh.

“What? Are you homophobic or something?” Gigi added, and Crystal simply laughed.

”As if! Have you seen me? I think I should get ‘flaming lesbo’ tattooed on my cheek. I just didn’t know about you…” Crystal rushed out before she could even think about it. Never did she think she would come out in that way. In her mind, for most of her life, she had anticipated coming out in a very deep, emotional way - likely crying on Gigi’s bed. This was nothing of the sort.

“You’re a lesbian? Wow. I should’ve known,” the blonde simpered, and Crystal shoved her shoulder playfully.

.

When my therapist recommended I write these, I thought it would help me get over you, but fuck I think I’m falling harder for you. That floral outfit you wore yesterday was so cute. When you walked into class, it lit the whole room up. You truly are God’s favourite, huh? Just kidding I don’t believe in God, but whoever sculpted you took their time.

“Crystal look at this one! This is the most poetic piece of artwork I have ever read,” Gigi gaped, rushing towards Crystal after the latter had waited outside her human biology class for her.

The older girl took the letter and read through it, biting hard on her lower lip whilst Gigi watched with a smile, “It’s cute,” she said.

“It isn’t just cute! It’s… beguiling!”

“Do you even know what that means?”

The blonde groaned as they began to walk through the hallways together.

“I think you’re jealous because no one is writing you captivatingly beautiful love letters.”

Crystal shrugged and continued walking, eventually bumping into Daegen and going for a much-needed smoke. The blue-haired girl didn’t want to come off as cold to her best friend, but she feared that if she said too much, Gigi would make the connection. She smoked in silence, allowing Daegen to rant about her weekly argument with Daya that would likely be resolved by Friday. Occasionally she would nod, but she kept quiet.

It was surprising to Crystal that Gigi appreciated the letters so much. She thought the blonde would find them creepy and stalker-like, and perhaps fear for her own safety, but the opposite reaction was apparent. So now Crystal didn’t know what to do. Gigi was falling for her words, but she didn’t know it was her.

Apparently Daegen had been saying something because suddenly the girl was snapping her pink acrylic covered fingers in front of her eyes.

“Are you listening to me, Crys? I asked what you were planning on doing for Halloween this Friday?”

Oh. Crystal had almost forgotten that she had been working on her Corpse-bride inspired Halloween costume since July, putting her entire soul into the concept and causing her fingers to bleed with the many late nights of sewing layers of tulle. Everything with Gigi must have been really getting in her head - so much so that she forgot about the object of her whole summer.

She was too old for trick or treating now, unfortunately, but she had been planning to have a small get-together (edging on a party) with her remote friend group as well as others. Gigi had promised to attend, after spending the last two Halloweens with the popular kids getting shitfaced at college parties.

“Don’t you remember? I’m throwing a party. My dad is out of town for work and my mom is spending time with our grandma. The house will be empty,” Crystal grinned, puffing a cloud of smoke into the air.

“Crystal Lucia Elizabeth throwing a party? Who would’ve thought,” Daegen smirked, “Is Geege coming?”

“Yup,” Crystal said, her smile faltering slightly as she popped the ‘p.’ Daegen didn’t press on, so soon they were both putting their cigarettes out and heading to their next class.

Word of Crystal’s Halloween party spread like a virus, and the prominent conversation around the school was what everyone was wearing. Thankfully for Crystal, most of her friends were art kids, so instead of wearing a slutty (insert random occupation) costume, they’d all be wearing actual thought-out looks.

At lunchtime, Crystal and Gigi sat under the bleachers together, sipping Yakults and talking about their days. The blue-haired girl asked Gigi what she’d be wearing to her Halloween party, but the blonde wouldn’t tell her.

“It’s a surprise.” her eyes were glinting smugly. Gigi was a seamstress, and everyone knew it. She would create intricately designed, beautiful outfits and sell them to big names on Instagram. Crystal often wondered why she hadn’t just dropped out of school, considering it seemed like she had a strong career set in stone.

But oh boy, Crystal knew whatever it was that Gigi was planning to wear would sweep her off her feet. Figuratively and literally - she was quite clumsy.

.

I can’t wait to see you at the Halloween party tomorrow. I know you’re going to look ethereal. You always do. It’s so hard to look at you without kissing you. I don’t know why I would ever think you would kiss me considering I’m not even half as pretty as you, but I will continue to manifest it as long as you’re in my life. I think I love you.

“She said she loved me in yesterday’s letter,” Gigi shouted through the wind, holding onto Crystal’s waist tight as the latter peddled through the neighbourhood.

“Do you love her?” Crystal replied, thankful that her friend was unable to see her expression at that moment. She couldn’t think straight with Gigi holding her in that way.

“I mean. I guess I have to talk to her face to face. For all I know she can’t speak for shit in real life. She said she’s going to your party tonight. Maybe all will be revealed…”

Crystal breathily laughed out a response as she turned into the school gate. She knew she wasn’t ready to come clean yet. Gigi would simply have to wait another day.

The day passed in a blur. The girls skipped Phys Ed as per usual, but instead returned to the library again for extra revision instead of going back to the bike sheds to get high like last time.

Friday night took a painfully long time to come, but when it did, Crystal could hardly breathe the entire day. She managed to flirt her way out of sixth-period history so she was able to speedily bike her way home to make a start on her eccentric Halloween makeup. People were set to begin arriving at 9 pm, and there wasn’t much preparation to be done aside from throwing a couple of fake cobwebs around the place and placing stacks of red solo cups on the kitchen counter. Her makeup would take at least an hour and a half, so as soon as she got home she took a five-minute shower before beginning the look.

She painted her entire body a silvery grey before carving out strong cheekbones with black paint, giving her an undead appearance. She shaped her brows in a way that would make her look constantly mournful. She slipped her dress on, threw on four different silver necklaces, pulled her voluminous black wig over her head, and clipped the vail to it carefully. After admiring her masterpiece through her phone camera for a few minutes, the doorbell rang. It was Lux and Tiff, who had texted to say they were arriving early.

“Oh my God,” Crystal squealed as she opened the door, revealing the two girls. Both of them were dressed in beige prison outfits, and it quickly clicked to her that they were supposed to be Alex and Piper from Orange Is the New Black. “Lesbians, I assume,” she grinned, but the two girls in front of her were too busy gaping at her own outfit.

“Wow. You are Tim Burton’s wet dream,” Tiff said, pushing past Crystal and entering her home.

“No, I’m not. I’m not white, remember,” Crystal joked.

Lux had brought her large overpriced speaker to blast music. She heaved it into the living room and plugged it in, immediately starting to blast Stupid Love cause she was that girl.

Luckily for Crystal, her neighbourhood adored her. Her street was predominantly old women, but instead of constantly yelling at Crystal for dressing slutty, partying and smoking weed on her roof, they would simply envy her recklessness.

After an hour of pre-shots, people began to arrive. Most people brought their own alcohol, but it was clear that many of them were already drunk before they even arrived. Crystal remained in the foyer, leaning against the wall, singing along to Lux’s music and answering the doorbell whenever it rang. Every time the ringing echoed across the house, she’d subconsciously pray Gigi was on the other side, but for the first two hours, it never was.

Nicky, Jaida and Gigi all arrived at once, and Crystal felt herself get cotton mouth for a second when she looked over them all. Nicky was dressed in a basic white gown with her blonde hair down, however, she was absolutely drenched in fake blood and she wore a small prom queen tiara and sash. It was obviously a Carrie cosplay, and Crystal adored it. Jaida had her entire body painted green and wore a black catsuit over it, cosplaying as Gamora from Guardians of the Galaxy.

Crystal complimented their costumes first, but she couldn’t take her eyes off Gigi. Her Halloween costume wasn’t as bold as they had been in the previous years, but there was something about it that took Crystal’s breath away. The blonde had her hair down and curled in smooth waves and she was wearing a loose white dress with a victorian-Esque corset pulling her waist in impossibly tight. She had dripped wax below her eyes, giving a crying illusion, and her makeup was a shimmery purple, making her look angelic. Yes - that was her costume - an angel. Strapped across her back was the largest pair of faux feather angel wings Crystal had ever seen. They were reminiscent of the ones a Victoria’s Secret models would wear, and they shimmered under the moonlight.

“Holy fuck…” Crystal blurted, before squeaking slightly.

“I know right? They’re so fucking heavy,” Gigi giggled before hopping in and air-kissing Crystal on each cheek, “You look so good, girl.”

“Thanks,” Crystal smiled, deciding that she would no longer be taking doorbell duty. She wanted to enjoy herself, so she walked through to the kitchen where Daya was doing body shots with some guy she had never seen before and promptly decided to join her.

Every so often, she would catch Gigi dancing and knocking things over with her wings. She didn’t mind if Gigi ended up shattering a vase. She would glue up every fragment of china for her.

After her second shot, Crystal made her way to the living room with Daegen to observe people’s dancing, and that’s when she saw them.

There was this guy from Gigi’s geography class that she never shut up about. His name was Toby, and he was one of those ‘hipster boys.’ He was a self-proclaimed feminist but probably cried about rejections from women on the internet. Every time Crystal saw his lanky frame enter a room, she felt sick and fantasized about decking him. There was something about him that was just so irritating to her, and every time he stuck his tongue out at her friend or wiggled his eyebrows like a fucking loser, Crystal wanted to cave in on herself.

And there he was, in her home, dancing with her best friend to ‘If You’re Too Shy’ by The 1975, grinding against her cause her angel wings were too large for the roles to be reversed. Gigi was biting her lip and grinning wide - evidently drunk - and she flipped her hair and bounced to the upbeat synth. Nicky was cheering her on from the couch, and Crystal wished she could just shut the party down. So much for Gigi falling in love with her words? Now she was grinding over some flimsy incel that looked like he would have to be pegged by a woman in bed.

It only got worse from there. The blonde caught Crystal’s eye and she walked up to her slowly, her hand still intertwined with Toby’s. Her words were so slurred that the older girl almost didn’t catch them, but she heard Gigi say: “Hey Toby was wondering if your bedroom was free? All the other ones are occupied but I’m desperateeee.”

Crystal had to hold back the mouthful of vomit threatening to spill from her lips. Gigi was so incredibly drunk, and it seemed like Toby was sober, so the entire endeavour didn’t sit right with her at all. She mentally cursed herself for being so generous, because before she could even register what she was doing, she was pulling a small key out of her bra and Gigi and Toby were rushing their way upstairs.

“Fuck, Crys. Have some respect for yourself,” she mumbled when she was out of earshot from her friend. Decidedly, she made her way to the garden where she knew Daegen was smoking with Tiff. She had to ease her mind.

.

“Fuck, Goode, you’re so hot,” Toby grunted, carelessly pulling Gigi’s wings off her arms. Gigi’s mind was hazy and she couldn’t think or speak properly, so she wasn’t able to tell the boy that the wings were handmade and extremely fragile.

“Thanks,” she slurred as he began to undress her, “Wait.”

“What?”

“Let me try and find a condom.”

She hopped off Crystal’s bed and somehow managed to find her way to her friend’s chest of drawers. She found panties and tampons among many other things, but she couldn’t find a condom. She reached the final drawer and frantically poked around for one. Then she grabbed something, and suddenly she sobered up.

It was a red A5 notepad with a black swirly binder. On the red cover, Gigi spotted five faces; Zayn, Niall, Liam, Harry and Louis. She chuckled slightly, before opening the notebook. Her heart dropped. If the familiar 1D watermark print paper wasn’t enough to make the connection, the titular scribble saying ‘Love letter for Geege draft’ at the top sealed it.

“Are you okay, Gigi?” she heard Toby ask from the bed.

The blonde paused and furrowed her brow, not sure what to do next. “Um. I can’t do this. Sorry.”

“But it was gonna be so good… You look so fine…” “Not tonight, Toby. Sorry.”

Her tone was serious, and Toby knew not to cross her. The boy watched as she pulled her dress and wings back on, and squinted his eyes when she saw a small red notebook in her hands.

“What’s that?” he pressed.

“Get out. Crystal wouldn’t want you in her room.”

After muttering a few disgusting insults under his breath, he left the room, leaving Gigi alone on her best friend’s bed with an overwhelming amount of thoughts.

Downstairs, Crystal had a growing concern as to where Gigi was, because she swore she saw Toby leave with another girl on his arm. Instead of being petty, she decided to be a good friend and creep up the stairs. To her surprise, her bedroom door was wide open. Upon entering, she realised it was empty. And then she saw the small A5 One Direction notebook wide open on her bed, and knew it was time to shut the party down.

It didn’t take more than fifteen minutes to get everyone out, but she was still met with groans of annoyance due to it only being little after midnight. Daya stayed back to help Crystal clean up, but the blonde knew something was wrong.

“Crys? What happened?” she asked, placing a hand on the girl’s shoulder. Her other hand was occupied with a large bin bag filled with chip packets, put-out cigarettes and paper cups.

The small motion of comfort caused Crystal to break down, tears tumbling down her cheeks and creating streaks in her white face paint. Patches of caramel skin showed through as she cried more and more.

“No one… touched you… did they?” Daya questioned, dropping the trash bag and wrapping her arms around her friend’s waist.

“No,” Crystal sobbed, “I don’t really wanna talk about it. I’m fine. I just have to figure out a couple of things.”

“Do you need me to stay over?”

“No. It’s fine. I need some alone time.” The house was back to its usual state after twenty minutes, then D aya’s Lyft arrived and she left. Crystal found herself in front of her vanity, scrubbing at her face with cotton pads in an attempt to remove her many layers of makeup. She turned on her ‘Sad Girl Hours’ Spotify playlist whilst she cleaned herself up and continued playing it when she slid into the bath.

Gigi knew.

She couldn’t even think about why Gigi was snooping about in her drawers, she just knew that Gigi knew. Gigi finally made the connection. Crystal’s mask of hiding behind her romantic words was gone. There was no coming back from this. Part of her wanted to slide her body down the white acrylic bathtub surface, submerging herself in the water and remaining there until her lungs couldn’t function without another breath.

Instead, she simply sat there, neck and below beneath the steaming water, eyes shut. Her mind swarmed with escape plans. Would transferring to another school be worth it? Her current school was the best in the district. Should she give it up merely to run away from her problems? Should she face the issue head-on and talk about it with Gigi? Yes. Will she? Absolutely not.

She clambered out when the steam from the water began to make her dizzy. She straightened her blue hair every morning, but it had returned to its curly, frizzy state when it became dampened by the water. She rang it out into the sink using a hand towel, droplets of water falling from her naked frame. Everything was calm. The only thing that could be heard was the occasional sniffle - for Crystal was still crying sightly.

But, like all things, the peace came to an end when Crystal heard a clattering noise come from her bedroom. She yanked a towel from behind the bathroom door before hesitantly making her way back to her room, gasping when she saw someone climbing through her window. Instinctively, she grabbed a tennis racket that was hanging in the corner of her room.

“Jesus Christ - put that down!” the intruder gasped, and Crystal realised that it wasn’t an escaped prisoner coming to steal her and hold her captive in their trunk - it was Gigi.

Part of Crystal wanted to hit Gigi across the head with the racket painstakingly hard so the blonde’s memory would be wiped, forgetting the humiliating events of the day, but instead, Crystal just placed the racket down and covered herself tensely. She was still in her towel, and her hair was still dripping down her shoulders. She likely looked a mess, but it was too dark to notice.

“It’s almost 3 am…” Crystal whispered. Although she didn’t ask anything, it was clear her statement meant ‘why are you here?’

Gigi’s eyes trailed over to the blue-haired girl’s bed where the notebook still sat. Crystal had been afraid to touch it.

“Listen, if you’re going to ridicule me, do it on Monday, cause I’m too tired for this-” the older girl began, but Gigi stepped closer towards her.

The blonde had removed her costume and had her face now bare of any makeup. She was just stood there in black sports leggings and a pink sweater that was three sizes too large, swallowing up her slender frame. Her hair was damp and now in plaits, and her eyes were as puffy and tear-stained as Crystal’s, yet somehow still so beautiful.

“I’m not going to ridicule you, Crys,” she whispered, “I just wanna know… Was it you all along?”

Crystal didn’t wanna say it. Her body had never burned so bad, despite being bare and dripping with water. It was impossible to look Gigi in the eye, so instead, she looked at the gathering dust on the floor, gulping instead of responding.

“Answer me, Crys.” - she was getting closer.

“I don’t know if I can- if I can say it-” Crystal stumbled, her voice cracking under pressure.

Gigi stepped into Crystal’s bubble suddenly, reaching for the latter’s shaky hand. She took it in her own and pressed a soft kiss to it. “Don’t be scared to talk to me. We are best friends, remember. We vowed to always be transparent with one another - so I need you to tell me.”

After too long, Crystal finally met Gigi’s sparkling blue gaze. She swallowed back yet another lump in her throat before nodding. “It was me. I wrote them. All of them.”

The older girl swore she heard Gigi’s breathing hitch, but if the blonde was shocked in any way, she didn’t show any sign of it.

“I wanted to believe it was you, but when you seemed so disinterested in the letters, I began to question it. I never knew that you could write in such a way, Crys,” Gigi smiled sadly, reaching over to catch a tear spilling from Crystal’s eye with her thumb. The touch seemed to burn, sending electrifying sensations through both of them. “Did you truly mean everything you wrote in those letters or was it all a big joke to make me feel special?”

Crystal gasped slightly and furrowed her brow.

“Gigi Goode… You are special. When we got high during Phys Ed and you were all touchy I- I realised that I liked you. Even though it hasn’t been long since I realised it, I know my attraction to you has been there from the start. It started to become impossible to be around you without telling you how I felt, so I wrote it down in letters and hoped I could send the feeling away.”

Crystal was crying now - hard. She was a crier, and everyone knew it, but there was something about the quiet whimpers escaping her lips at that moment that took Gigi off guard.

“I wish you would’ve told me but, I can’t blame you. It’s terrifying,” Gigi sighed, stepping even closer. “I can’t even begin to explain how those letters made me feel, Crys. They made me feel like I hold some significance in somebody’s life. That someone might want me. That I am good enough for someone. You made me feel all that.”

In a bold move, Crystal was reaching towards her friend and tucking an escaped wisp of blonde hair behind her ear, “I can’t imagine a world where you aren’t good enough, Geege.”

“Your letters made me feel so loved,” Gigi sniffled. “Do you love me, Crystal?”

Crystal parted her lips, her hand still lingering by the side of Gigi’s face. It was a make or break moment.

“Yes,” she breathed, and then Gigi was leaning in.

The blonde paused before their lips could meet, looking for a sign of approval in her friend’s eyes. Crystal nodded, and that gave Gigi what she needed to finally press her lips against the former’s frown. They instantly became so content like that, lips moving together so perfectly like they just fit.

It was so gentle, to begin with, Crystal’s hand barely touching the side of Gigi’s face - but then the blonde’s fingers grabbed the top of Crystal’s arm, pulling her closer and prying her mouth open with her tongue. Their lips shifted clumsily against each other, but it still felt so right. Crystal tasted like teardrops and pineapple juice, and Gigi tasted like mint.

As the kiss became more and more heated, Crystal figured out what to do with her free hand. She took Gigi’s hand and led her towards the knot that held her towel together, staring at the blonde with dark, lustful eyes.

“I want you,” Crystal said, like it was a promise, “I need you.”

“I’m yours,” Gigi replied, pulling the knot loose and watching as the towel dropped by Crystal’s feet, showing off tanned curves glistening in water drops, begging to be marked.

They pulled one another in once again in a knee-weakening kiss, their noses colliding with each other as the passion fogged their minds. Soon, they were falling onto Crystal’s bed, and Crystal was watching whilst Gigi undressed herself in front of her.

“Promise me we’ll do this, and then we will talk everything out?” Crystal asked whilst Gigi was pulling her leggings off.

The blonde pressed a gentle kiss against Crystal’s cheek before whispering, “Of course. I love you.”

While Crystal watched Gigi hook a naked leg over her own, all she could think was: Widow VonDu needs a pay rise.

[clan-sayeed-fic]

It’s just a moment (Kamilah Sayeed & MC)

Book: Bloodbound (property of Pixelberry Studios) Pairing: Kamilah Sayeed & MC: Amy (I do not own those characters, they’re the property of Pixelberry Studios as well.) Warnings: fluff

Author’s note:  I’m not a native English speaker, I’m sorry for any mistakes (feel free to correct me).

Hi, it’s been a while since I posted 😄

It’s a one-shot story, yeah, I know, you can be angry at me for not continuing Meant To Be, and instead, writing something new haha 😅  

I hope you’ll enjoy this short story 💕 

~ 1900 words  

————————

It’s just a moment

A sound of quiet scratching of the pencil on the paper filled the air in Central Park in New York.

It was dark outside, as almost everyone in the city was sleeping for a long time, except for Amy. Instead, she was sitting there near the lake, with her earphones on, lost in her drawing.

A delicate gust of wind was brushing her blonde hair from time to time, making it fall on her face. That was the only thing interrupting Amy’s creative process as she had to every couple of minutes tuck her hair behind the ears to see anything.

Beyond that, everything around her was peaceful, as always.

Recently she had been spending most of her evenings out there. She usually went to the park after her classes at college or her part-time job finished. Then, she used to stay there until the evening, writing down her thoughts next to the drawings she made during the day.

That night would have been no different, except something happened.

Amy was in the middle of sketching the panorama of the city when she noticed a slight change in her surroundings. Maybe it was her sixth sense that people keep talking so much about… perhaps not.

It had to be so much more… fate?

She looked up from her work to see someone walking far away from her in a different direction. Because of the faint light of the lamps, she could only recognize the shape of a human. Someone who, like a shadow, was hidden behind the darkness of the night.

The girl took out her earphones. The sweet music faded away, making it possible to focus on the quiet sounds of the park. But as soon she did that, the shadow disappeared, impossible to find anywhere.

“Weird…” Amy muttered to herself.

But since the person she saw was walking in a different direction, she decided there was nothing to worry about. Just to be more cautious, she left the earphones alone, turning off the music and focusing back on her work.

Another few lines appeared on the drawing, creating shadows of the buildings. Amy wanted to check something in her notes, so she put the current sketch and a few previous ones aside. Suddenly, the wind got more powerful, and even if the girl managed to catch in time most of the sheets of paper, the one on the top went flying in the air.

Her eyes followed the journey of the drawing until she saw it landing on the ground a few matters ahead. The girl let out a short sigh of relief as the sheet of paper might have as well landed in the water.

But her relief faded away when she noticed someone bending over to pick it up.

Amy stayed in one place stiff, but luckily it was just a strange woman that probably went out for a walk in the dark of night.

She was wearing a fancy, and probably expensive, burgundy suit. When she stood up straight, Amy was able to look closely at her features. They were absolutely perfect, creating a beautiful image that left the girl speechless.

“Out of pure curiosity,” the woman spoke aloud, an intoxicating sound of her voice certainly wasn’t helpful at that moment. “What a young artist is doing here at this hour?”

Corners of the woman’s mouth curled up a little, making Amy finally stop staring at them. Instead, she moved her gaze up, meeting those beautiful chestnut eyes, getting lost in the view… again.

Say something, the girl scolded herself, prying for her own voice to sound natural.

“Um…” she slowly got up, gathering her things. “I’m no artist.”

The woman looked at her confidently, taking Amy’s whole appearance in. For a moment, the girl could swear that she saw a red spark among the warm brown shade inside her iris. That’s when another gust of wind appeared, messing Amy’s hair, causing her to blush a little.

“Alright, No-artist,” the woman said when the wind went down. “That doesn’t alter the fact that it’s still late,” her eyes squinted, “and dangerous for you to be out here.”

This time Amy was the one with the confidence in her green eyes. She didn’t like to be bossing around, and despite aura this woman had around herself, she felt like the stranger was crossing the line.

“Well, I’m not the only one out here,” Amy smiled teasingly, pretending to sound like her, “at this hour.”

The woman raised her left eyebrow at those words, quite impressed. But even this small gesture caused Amy to lose all of her previous confidence, making her cheeks turn pinkish.

“Fair enough,” finally, the brunette spoke, giving Amy a short break from her intense stare. “My name is Kamilah.”

She took a few steps toward the girl, reaching out her hand. In the other one, she was holding the drawing of Amy’s. But the girl completely forgot about that, paying all her attention to this intriguing person she had just met.

“I’m Amy,” she shook the hand, feeling the electricity coming through her body as their skin touched with each other.

Again, this spark in the woman’s eyes. Amy was almost sure that she saw a crimson shade inside of them, but… that’s not possible, right?

“Haven’t you had enough art for one day?” Kamilah took her hand away, keeping eye contact with the girl.

“Excuse me?” Amy stiffened slightly, a mistrust building inside her chest.

But the woman only smiled softly, noticing this change in her appearance. She was able to easily sense her muscles tensing, breath getting lighter before it would, as the opposite, become heavy from fear.

She knew the pattern of her victims.

“Can you see this enormous building?” Kamilah pointed in the direction, making Amy’s eyes follow. “That’s my company, Ahmanet Financial,” she said, still noticing a misunderstanding in the girl’s eyes. “I can easily see you from my office, sitting here every day, drawing.”

Amy looked once again at the building, measuring the distance inside her head. After a moment, she laughed shortly, looking back at the woman.

“What do you have there, a telescope?” Amy laughed again, but seeing that her joke made no impression on the woman, she bit her lower lip to shut herself up.

“Let’s call it,” Kamilah stared for a moment at her mouth before she looked into her eyes, “good eyesight.”

“Sure…” Amy let go of the topic, but inside her head, thoughts were fighting with each other.

How good eyesight she had to have to notice her from such distance? To recognize her?

“And now,” Kamilah went back to the question, “why, pray tell, are you still out here?”

For a moment, Amy considered if she should answer this question. But, after a while of searching for a hint of bad intentions inside the woman’s eyes, she gave up.

“I…” the girl wasn’t sure what words to use, but Kamilah’s encouraging nod helped her keep going. “I like drawing during the day because I can capture the moment of people’s life. The one and only moment from my perspective, as the couples sit by the lake, talking. Children play around after finishing school. Owners come out with their dogs for a walk…” she smiled, reminding herself all sketches that she had of those situations. “I like it a lot, but what I truly love…” she paused, looking at the surroundings, “…is cherishing those moments. Improving them on the paper, maybe adding something new, taking something away… it depends.”

A short silence fell between them, as Kamilah was listening, lost in this answer. After a while, she lifted the piece of paper that she held in her hand all this time. And for the first one, she looked at the sketch.

“So,” her voice full of curiosity, “what kind of moment do you capture by drawing the city that will remain the same for years?”

Amy laughed sweetly at this clueless tone of the woman’s voice. But in return, Kamilah only gave her a small smile, nothing less, nothing more.

“The city will stay the same,” the blonde started patiently, “but I won’t. It’s about capturing how I see it tonight. Tomorrow my eyes might see this building differently. I might focus on different aspects, "she looked at the panorama covered with darkness. "What if I can’t come here tomorrow, and today is the last opportunity for me to catch this memory?”

Their eyes met again. Brown with the green ones, looking into each other’s souls. The invisible connection was growing between them with every second.

“I know,” Amy laughed again, looking down, “it sounds crazy, I’m sorry, I got lost in this explanation.”

“No, it does not,” Kamilah’s confident voice made the girl lift her gaze. “And don’t ever apologize for being passionate about something,” she returned the sketch. “And this is really a good drawing.”

For a while, they stood in front of each other speechless, but there was no awkwardness between them. The silence seemed natural until Amy interrupted it after catching herself on getting lost in the woman’s eyes once again.

“So…” she started quietly. “What about you, Kamilah? Why are you here tonight?”

The question clearly caught the woman off guard as she moved slightly, composing herself. She wasn’t expecting Amy to ask her anything, she wasn’t expecting anyone to be curious about her at this point.

And for sure, Kamilah didn’t plan on telling the real reason for her visit to the park.

“I wanted to get some fresh air after work,” a lie smoothly escaped her mouth.

“At this hour?” Amy tilted her head to the right, smiling.

“Yes,” Kamilah smirked at this adorable human being. “I work late, and I really appreciate the night air. There is something calm about being outside when everyone around is sleeping, waiting for the next day,” she closed her eyes for a second, taking herself out of those thoughts. “See? You’re not the only one talking crazy,” Kamilah laughed nervously.

“You’re not talking crazy,” Amy was listening to her mesmerized.

Another gust of wind picked up, breaking the tension between them.

“I should get going,” the woman spoke after the wind calmed itself.

“Wait,” Amy’s voice sounded more panicked than she wanted. “I mean… why don’t you stay with me a little bit longer? I could use some company.”

She didn’t want to scare the woman with her invitation, so she added a little smile, patiently waiting for an answer. Kamilah studied her face for a few seconds, considering her options.

She could stay there with this charming young woman, enjoy her company, learn more about her. Maybe even let her in. But it wasn’t hard for Kamilah to predict how it would end up for both of them.

The vampire knew too well how this whole situation would have turned out if not for this one piece of paper landing in front of her, interrupting her previous plan.

“I really appreciate the invitation,” chestnut eyes looking deeply into hers. “Maybe some other time, Amy.”

The wind picked up much more, making Amy’s hair fall on her face, leaving her struggling with it for a moment.

“I’m looking forward…” the girl finally regained control over her hairstyle, just to find herself alone in the park, “…to that.”

She looked around, but the mysterious woman was nowhere to find. Amy was confused, but she decided to not overthink the situation too much. Instead, she sat down on the ground and took out a new sheet of paper.

The graphite of the pencil left several lines on the white surface.

As Amy was capturing another moment.

[midshipmank]

i wanted LWJ with a motorcycle & somehow ended up with this librarian!LWJ & art student!WWX au

LWJ is a librarian at a public library 

WWX met LWJ when he returned some books 3 months late

LWJ looked at him all judgy like “these are 3 months late,” & WWX promptly became obsessed 

WWX is now a much more responsible library user, mostly because he’s there all the time

but listen he’s not great at focusing in the library, that’s why he doesn’t even use the one on campus. so now he’s his usual amount of restless + distracted by LWJ

trying to figure out how to make a move 

meanwhile LWJ is just like “do not throw crumpled pieces of paper through the air”

some of those crumpled pieces of paper are failed sketches of LWJ

one day WWX stays all the way to closing because LWJ PRETTY OKAY? also he has an art theory paper due pls don’t talk to him about it

so anyway he’s there when the library is closing & LWJ is like “leave”

so he goes :((( but he’s so late LWJ practically follows him out 

which 

is when WWX discovers that that pretty white & blue motorcycle that’s always parked out front?

that’s Lan Wangji’s 

he absolutely loses his mind

all of his friends know about his ridiculous librarian crush by now & they all make fun of him for it

but anyway, the poor boy has it bad

he’s like “A-Cheng, you don’t understand, he could step on me & i’d thank him. actually i think i need him to step on me.” 

JC is like “i did Not want to know that”

meanwhile WWX is bemoaning the fact that he ever became a responsible library user

“how am i supposed to interact with him. i can’t return books late anymore bc i’m always there! what would my excuse be? & he’s already explained how to use their database to me 3 times, i can’t keep looking this dumb” 

JYL is very gently like “maybe just ask him out?” 

“but he doesn’t like me! i committed library crimes! i have to get him to like me first!”

then WWX sees a flyer in the lobby asking for volunteers. there’s gonna be an event in the kids section! for some special reading day! who tf knows, WWX doesn’t care, the point is, he’s good with kids. that would probably be appealing to LWJ. right? right? WWX really doesn’t know. LWJ is so hard to read. on the one hand, he’s the most tight-laced & responsible person WWX has ever met. on the other, he has a very sexy motorcycle. WWX doesn’t know what to do with that

but okay he has a plan

he calls up WQ & goes “can i borrow A-Yuan”

he already babysits A-Yuan every week, so it’s not that weird right?

WQ is like “i stg WWX if you are going to use A-Yuan to attract hot guys like in that movie with the people who love dogs....”

& WWX is like “i would never use A-Yuan like a dog! WQ do you even know me!” 

he gets A-Yuan, barely

anyway, he gets to the library ready to read to a bunch of kids & gets side-eyed by a lot of parents, but he still has fun!!

LWJ is, unfortunately, not the librarian supervising the event, but he is reshelving when WWX is off reading duty & A-Yuan gets the zoomies

ie, zooms right into LWJ’s legs

LWJ is, surprisingly, good with kids. WWX may need to marry him. he somehow manages not to make a complete fool of himself after this revelation

in fact, after this interaction, WWX thinks he may actually have scored some points with LWJ. he’s elated

he’s building all these elaborate future schemes in his head when suddenly he gets a call from Auntie Yu

she wants to know why his grade in his art theory class has plummeted. 

oh right. that class. that class that’s taught by that professor who hates him & that he honestly can’t understand a word of & honestly he hates art theory, he’s good at art, why does he have to take theory too? 

Auntie Yu lets him know in no uncertain terms that if he doesn’t improve his grades by the end of the semester, she will stop supporting him—it’s bad enough that they let him go to art school after he flunked out of his business degree anyway 

so—fuck. fuck. 

WWX throws himself into the redo paper he manages to beg off LQR. he has 3 days & he’s gonna make them count 

the first day goes well, if by well you mean that he raids the art section of the library & works himself until closing & tries desperately not to look like he’s dying in front of LWJ

day 2 goes........similarly, except he falls asleep at his desk & doesn’t wake up until LWJ tells him the library is closing, which? wtf? LWJ usually wakes him up when he falls asleep in the library. WWX has been asleep for hours. 

& also he looks like a wreck, which is not cute

he flees from the library only to find that the bus is going..... going......... gone

fuck. he doesn’t have a car. 

he’s staring down the road after the bus, trying to figure out which friend with a car is available for him to call when he hears someone say “Wei Ying?” behind him

it’s Lan Zhan.

how mortifying. 

he tries to laugh off his situation, but LWJ gets this set expression on his face & says, “i will give you a ride home” 

& WWX is like kinda definitely freaking out because this was not how his first ride on LWJ’s sexy motorcycle was supposed to go. WWX had a plan. he was supposed to be flirtatious & ask LWJ about his bike & then LWJ would offer to give WWX a ride & they’d go all around the scenic parts of the city & when they stopped WWX would be all flustered & breathless & he’d wobble getting off the bike & maybe fall into LWJ & maybe—

okay so his plan was more like a daydream, but at the very least, he wasn’t supposed to look like he’d spent the last 48hrs out of the sun, drinking unhealthy amounts of shitty coffee, wearing a ratty hoodie & art-grimed jeans. like, they’re not even grimey in a cute way

but LWJ is insistent & WWX is weak, so somehow he ends up on the back of the bike wearing LWJ’s helmet with LWJ telling him to hold on tight

he’s half-convinced he’s fallen asleep on the bus stop bench & is dreaming the whole thing

but soon enough, it’s over & they’re stopped outside of WWX’s shitty student accommodations

he gets off & is trying to awkwardly thank LWJ when LWJ says, “you’ve seemed upset these past 2 days”

“ahaha, yeah, i’m just writing a paper”

“for an art theory class?”

WWX is like ????? but then he remembers that LWJ knows what books he checks out 

“yeah. it’s a redo actually. professor Lan hates me.” he forces a laugh. why did he say that. being hated by a professor is not cute, especially not to sexy librarian LWJ. 

“my uncle has high expectations,” LWJ says. 

WWX brain short circuits. 

“your uncle???” shit shit shit Lan Qiren is LWJ’s uncle! LWJ’s uncle hates him! he has no chance now! 

“mn.” 

WWX wants to die

LWJ looks considering, then says, “it is my day off tomorrow. if you would like, i can help you with the paper.”

WWX is already the least cute, most pathetic version of himself he’s ever been in his life. he says yes. 

so they meet up at the library the next day & WWX apologizes profusely for making LWJ come into work when it’s his day off. he promises LWJ endless free coffee from the coffeeshop he works at (even if he has to pay for it himself—he doesn’t tell LWJ that part). 

LWJ is way too nice to him & also manages to explain this school of art theory in a way that?? sort of?? makes sense?? though not in a way that makes WWX like it. but LWJ seems neutral about it, so at least he’s not trying to get WWX to agree with it. 

but anyway, WWX manages to pull a passable paper together & in the process LWJ reveals that he’s noticed WWX sketching in the library a lot more than WWX realized, and that he likes WWX’s art. 

WWX is lightheaded

he stares at LWJ for a while & LWJ looks at him & says, “Wei Ying. you should be typing.” 

WWX gets the paper done by 5pm somehow. somehow! he sends it off to LQR with a groan of relief. he’s so tired his bones are aching, but he looks over at LWJ, art theory & citation king, who of course always looks perfect & beautiful, & goes, “i could kiss you.” 

instead of “i don’t know how i’m ever going to thank you for this,” which is what he thought he was gonna say

LWJ’s eyes widen slightly & his ears go red. WWX wants to smack himself in the face. he wants to eat his words. he wants to crawl into a cramped dark place like a disgusting little mole & never see the sun again.

then LWJ says, “have dinner with me first.” 

WWX gapes at him. LWJ looks back, ears still red but eyes steady. 

“okay,” WWX squeaks. 

they go to dinner. WWX still feels like trash, but they end up having a rousing discussion about art & WWX learns all about when LWJ studied art history in undergrad & how he actually doesn’t like the kind of theory his uncle teaches (“but you’re too good to ever tell him that,” WWX teases. “....most of the time.” WWX laughs in delight.) 

LWJ reveals that he brought an extra helmet today, in case WWX needed a ride again. WWX is embarrassed & pleased & wants to marry LWJ again. feeling foolish, he leans into LWJ flirtatiously & suggests they go for a ride—just for the view. LWJ looks at him so long his knees turn to jelly. then LWJ says, “mn.” 

they make out on some scenic ridge somewhere

the end! 

other things about this au:

WWX does digital painting mostly, his ideal job is illustration/comics; he has a instagram/patreon he uses for art commissions (some of which are pornographic—LWJ catches him sketching in the library one day, early in this tableau. it does not go well.) 

his instagram/patreon is mostly anonymous. it’s not that he minds people knowing he draws explicit stuff sometimes, it’s that he doesn’t want Auntie Yu to find out 

he draws LWJ a lot

not explicitly

(at least not until he’s got a life model and LWJ’s consent)

he’s not at the library 24/7. he has a coffeeshop job, classes, studio time for non-digital art, A-Yuan, and friends. but he’s at the library a lot.

this is undergrad for WWX, but he’s non-trad. he flunked out of a soul-sucking business degree in his first go at undergrad & was on pretty shaky ground with the Jiang family for a while. then he sold some of his art & Auntie Yu said they would support him through art school if it was the only thing he was good at. kinda stung, but at least he doesn’t have to pay tuition.

he’s desperate to prove he can make it as an artist

when anyone asks LWJ about his bike, he says he got it because it allows him to weave around traffic. yes, there’s more to it than that, but no he won’t go into it. (this entire au formed because i found out WYB rides motorcycles professionally & went, “wow that’s hot.” we have no thoughts here.) 

WWX did not have to try to make LWJ like him. LWJ liked him. & while WWX might not have gotten his ideal first bike ride, you better believe LWJ got his. he daydreams about scooping WWX onto his bike & riding off into the sunset

[pluto-fics]

Inspiration is Motivation － Prologue

Fanfiction | Artist!Taehyung x SingleMom!Reader

Genres: Fluff, Romance, Humor, Smut

Rating: G (for this chapter)

Word Count: 2.385 words

Chapter Warnings: none

Your brows furrow at the earlier statement of your best friend, Hanna.

"Believe me, it'll help you to relax for a few hours and I'll take good care of Ty."

You have no doubt about the latter. Hanna might be that stereotype single woman who likes to go out for a couple drinks every so often, but she is a reliable caretaker and one ridiculously good cook. Based on this, she was an absolute blessing the last two times she watched over your son. However, you still feel a little uneasy about her suggestion.

"I don't know... Tyler is kind of stubborn and moody lately, how could I leave you both alone for nearly four full hours? Not to mention that I can paint at home if I want to, I don't need to go to some weird art course..." you try to defy yourself. The idea of entrusting Hanna with your five year old son for so long worries you. Just the thought of it causes a bad feeling to spread throughout your body. Hanna just rolls her eyes, however. "Listen. I already signed you up for that course this Saturday. It's supposed to start at eleven, won't go past three in the afternoon and you can calmly come back home to Tyler and me having a great time without setting your apartment on fire."

You can't fight down the amused giggle at her statement before you sigh. "Hanna, I really don't-..." you begin, only to be interrupted mid-sentence. "Yes, you do want to try it. I'll be here at 10 this Saturday and you can either go to that course or stay here with us and bathe in my judgment."

And here you are, two days later and sat on a chair in front of an empty canvas and an A3 sized sketchpad, surrounded by strangers who, just like you, are waiting for the course to begin.

You take this time to inspect the equipment provided to you. Brushes and pencils of rather good quality, however accompanied by a cheap, fizzy eraser. The watercolor paint seems decent enough. But the big bottles of acrylics and oils on the desk in the middle of the room, accessible for everyone in it, clearly are not top-notch quality. That of course does not mean it is bad per se, you just might have expected something fancier in the art department of the local Community College.

Your train of thoughts comes to an abrupt stop when you hear someone opening the big wooden door and entering the room, a deep but smooth voice wishing you and your fellow course participants a good morning. The slender figure who just stepped into the room makes your eyes grow wide the second you lay your eyes on him. He is tall, with model like features, facial as well as bodywise. His fashion sense clearly is a little extravagant, for he wears a way too oversized dress shirt with a pair of what almost seemed to be pajama pants of some sort, and a matching beige colored beret topping his head. The big round glasses topping his nose make you curious. Does he need them to see? Or were they simply added to this retro outfit because they fit the vibe?

"I'm glad you all made it here on time, unlike myself" he then speaks while rummaging in the bag he has just placed on top of the desk in the front of the room. You hear quiet giggles erupting from two slightly older women in the back. His lips curve into a handsome smile, not even needing to show the whites of his teeth to make you doubt the existence of a man with such impressive visuals. Yet, you feel kind of stupid for the way you swoon over his looks like a teenager, despite being a grown woman with a child waiting for her to return home.

The young man claps his hands together as if to catch everyone's attention, even though he already possesses the full concentration of everyone in this room. "Now, I'd like to start by introducing myself, if that's alright by you."

He swiftly turns to the chalkboard behind himself and writes down what you assume to be his name.

"My name is Kim Taehyung and I teach traditional art at the local University. But as you can tell, I'm also hosting art courses like this one once a week, while also working as a hobby freelance artist. So I guess you could say that art is my passion."

There it is again. That charming smile of his as he tends to the attentive group of people in front of him. "But enough of me, I think we're all here to improve our skills, so how about we start with some easy warm ups to get creative first?" You notice everyone responding by nodding or already flipping over the cover of the massive sketchpad in front of them to reveal a blank page. Imitating your 'classmates', you flip open your sketchpad and face Mr. Kim again.

He begins by instructing everyone to warm up their wrists by drawing circular shapes of several sizes and shading them to your heart's content to make yourself familiar with the medium you're using. Another hint of his is to try the different art materials provided to each one of the participants and see which one you'd preferably work with today.

A couple minutes later, you can tell Mr. Kim valued his participants' individuality. Only giving a rough theme for the artwork you are supposed to create, he left everything else to you. "Warm Autumn" was the theme he came up with and your mind immediately drifts off into what you would like to call your ‘creative mode’. Images of brown leaves, soft breezes of air and fluffy fabrics of knitwear come to your mind. Thus, you begin by settling on a color palette in warm brown, red and yellow tones and soon start by sketching an idea.

Mr. Kim does no longer talk to the whole course. Instead, he begins to slowly walk around the classroom and take a look at everyone's approaches on the topic. Usually, you'd get so engulfed in your works that you would blend out most of your surroundings. However, Mr. Kim's presence makes it hard for you to fully concentrate on the sketch before you like you usually would. You don't even need to look up to know where Mr. Kim currently stood at, while he gradually comes closer to where you are seated at.

The sound of his steps approaching you slowly sends shivers down your spine, just like the feeling of him standing right beside you, wordlessly examining your sketch. You can't keep from glancing up at his face as his gaze remains locked on the paper before you, an approving look surfacing on his face. He then glances at your face, his eyes meeting yours immediately as he leans down a bit to speak to you with a quieter, low voice. "Nice choice of motives. Do you have an idea for the final composition already?"

You feel your cheeks heating up as you mumble out a shy "Um, kind of", unsure of how to feel about the genuine interest Mr. Kim shows. It's been a while since someone other than your son Tyler had commented on one of your works. The young artist next to you smiles. "You're a fast one, huh? I like that. But let me know if you need anything, alright?" His voice is just as unique as his appearance. And the more you get to hear of it, the more you come to like the sound of it. Nodding your head with a smile, you thank him before he smiles back and moves on to the next participant of his course.

By the end of the course, you have created a piece you are rather proud of - the motives assembled in a harmonic way, adding to the calm and welcoming atmosphere of your painting. Throughout the creation process of it, Mr. Kim came around every once in a while to praise you for your ideas or help you improve parts of your piece in ways you wouldn't have been able to think of yourself. You have actually truly enjoyed today. At the end of the course, Mr. Kim gives his final speech in which he thanks everyone for participating and gives some last advice before sending everyone home with their final artworks. You had just put the materials you had used back to where you got them from, ready to pack your things to leave, when Mr. Kim approaches you with a gentle smile. "(Y/N), am I right?" He addresses you, your heart seemingly skipping a beat at the way your name sounds when spoken with his smooth voice. "Yes, that would be me" you say, turning to him with faked confidence. In reality, something about this Kim Taehyung makes you feel like a shy teenager again. He smiles apologetically as he asks "Do you perhaps have a minute or two to talk? If you're not in a hurry to be somewhere, that is."

To be honest, you want to apologize and leave right now. Tyler is waiting for you at home, after all. And so is Hanna. But your head nods on it’s own accord before your mind could stop it from doing so. What are a few minutes anyway, right?

"Great! Actually, I was curious to see how your piece turned out. To be honest, I didn't really get to look at it yet," he then says as he regards your artwork which is still on the easel at your seat. Examining it interestedly, he chuckles. "You're really talented, you know? This can't have been the first time you’ve painted something like this."

Your lips curve upwards in a bashful smile. "Ah, well actually... It's kind of my hobby. It's just that I haven't had much time to pursue it recently..." you answer. A soft humming noise resonates in his throat before he faces you again. "Are you interested in modern art too?" He suddenly asks, catching you a little off guard. "Modern art?" You repeat, to which he nods. "There's an art exhibition at the City Hall next friday. The main focus of it lays on contemporary artists and most works shown there are paintings and sculptures, rather than installations or anything like that. But I have a feeling that you might like it." You aren't sure where he was aiming at with this information, but you appreciate it. Mirroring his friendly smile, you say "It does sound interesting, yes. But I'm really busy lately, I'm not sure if I'll be able to go."

Mr. Kim seems understanding as he nods. "Well, if you do make it, maybe we'll meet there." He responds, making you nod slowly as you mumble a barely audible "That'd be nice." You want to ask him if there'd also be works of his exhibited there, remembering that he introduced himself as a freelance artist earlier, but the sound of your phone vibrating in your pocket interrupts you. "Ah, sorry" you then say, quickly looking at your phone to see messages of Hanna coming in. It’s nothing serious, just questions about whether Tyler still takes naps after lunch or not, since he apparently got a little energy boost after having eaten well. But it is urgent enough for you to decide that it is time to go home now. "I better get going now. Today was really nice, thank you. And thank you for telling me about the art exhibition, too. As you said, maybe we'll meet there." You speak as you collect your belongings and art piece, Mr. Kim nodding calmly and smiling as he wishes you a nice day before you leave.

On your way home, you keep thinking about today's events. About the fun you have had while painting for the first time in months and the useful help Mr. Kim had offered. The giddy feeling you got whenever he would lean in to talk to you quietly with that soothing deep voice of his. You have really had a great day, even if you still feel a little awkward for being so affected by the male's looks and kind words. But who could blame you, if said artist looks like a piece of art himself?

Arriving at home, the first thing you notice right after opening the front door is the welcoming scent of warm pancakes coming from your kitchen. Peeking past the doorframe, you smile at the sight of your best friend and son pouring dough into a frying pan together, your little son giggling in excitement.

"Hello you two" you greet the diligently working duo and laugh when your son immediately comes running to you to hug your legs and welcome you back excitedly. Crouching down to meet his eyes, you then give him a kiss on his cheek and smile at him. "Did you have a nice time with Hanna?" You ask, your smile widening when Tyler nods eagerly. "Yes! Hanna knows so many fun games for two! We played hide and seek too!” You give Hanna a glance, relieved to see her smiling just as happily as your little son. For some reason you’re always worried that he might be a little too challenging for her sometimes, but seeing her reaction to his happy storytelling, you have no doubt that she adores your son almost as much as you do.

Getting up to greet your friend properly with a short hug, you then look at the pile of pancakes on the kitchen counter. "Someone seems to be hungry, huh" you comment, Hanna rolling her eyes as she speaks, avoiding the topic. "How was the art course?"

You can feel Tyler leaning against your legs, silently requesting your attention. Picking him up to hold him close, you then begin to tell Hanna about the building, the people there, the fun you had when painting something from start to finish for the first time in ages, and in the end you thank her for having made this possible. Yet, a very specific detail you keep to yourself for now － Kim Taehyung.

Thank you for reading the Prologue to my new series “Inspiration is Motivation”!

If you can’t wait to read the next chapter, check out my Series Masterlist and follow @pluto-fics to be notified of new updates.

Stay safe and see you soon! 💜

- Pluto 🌑

[sanderssidesfanfiction]

Royal Growing Pains - Chapter Twenty Six

Warnings: Homophobia, transphobia, misgendering, sympathetic Deceit

Royal Growing Pains Tag

They sat in companionable silence for a while on the bottom step, Roman resting his head on Damien’s shoulder. “I’m glad we both like each other,” Roman said idly. “I know we completely skipped over boyfriends straight into fiancés, but regardless, liking each other is...good. Nice.”

Damien laughed and said, “Are you always this flustered around guys you like?” and Roman groaned.

“Look, not having the words to describe how I feel about love is not an uncommon thing,” Roman protested. “You’re the one who thought my smile was pretty enough to fall down the stairs for.”

Damien huffed in annoyance and Roman smirked. “You know it’s true,” Roman gloated.

“Are you going to bring that up whenever we have a debate?” Damien asked.

“It’s entirely possible, at least until you do something stupider,” Roman said.

Damien sighed. “Well, you’re honest about it at least.”

Roman grinned before looking up at the stairs behind them. “I hate that sooner or later we’re going to have to leave,” he sighed.

“Tell me about it,” Damien sighed. “I just hope we aren’t punished by being separated again.”

“I will fight tooth and nail against that, for what it’s worth,” Roman said. “I would argue I hated that more than you did. I had to be with my mother, after all.”

“That’s true,” Damien mused. “Maybe if they force that, I only do it under the negotiation that I stay with your mother so you can’t be in the same room as her?”

Roman snorted. “I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy, let alone you,” he said.

“And yet you do it to yourself?” Damien asked.

Roman went quiet. “Someone has to, at the end of the day.”

“That someone doesn’t have to be you,” Damien said.

“Well, I’m not going to wish it on anyone else in this castle, so I’m the only one left,” Roman said with a shrug. “This afternoon, and then tomorrow. The day after that is the rehearsal for the wedding, and before you know it, this will all be over.”

“I don’t want you being punished for the next three days, my dear,” Damien said.

Roman shrugged. “Punished for the next three days is better than punished for the rest of my life.”

“That’s what this was intended to be, my dear,” Damien said. “And that’s not fair to you. I want to lessen the suffering and punishment as much as possible.”

“I would argue you already have,” Roman said, stroking Damien’s cheek.

Damien turned pink and Roman bit his lip, wondering if it was too soon to try for a kiss. Roman leaned forward but Damien pulled back, and Roman stopped. Too soon, then.

“We should probably move away from the steps,” Damien said, standing up. “If we leave through the door behind us we’ll almost certainly be caught in an instant, but I know some ways to sneak around this castle and not get lectured quite yet.”

“Could we retreat to my room?” Roman asked. “Spend some time away from everyone before the inevitable lecture?”

“Of course, my love,” Damien said, holding out his hand, and Roman took it.

Damien helped Roman to his feet and they walked further into the basement. It wasn’t the most well-lit, but it wasn’t completely dark and dreary. “Is this storage space?” Roman asked.

“Mostly,” Damien agreed. “But the perk of that is that there are multiple ways to get to the storage from around the castle, depending on what you need.”

Roman nodded.

Damien led him up a flight of stairs to a nondescript door and held a finger to his lips. He pressed his ear to the wood, and, apparently satisfied with what he heard, opened the door and ushered Roman up and out of the basement. Roman recognized the mudroom he had ran through his first day here right down the hall, and Damien led him up the back stairs and both of them rushed to Roman’s room, Roman closing the door with a click and sighing. “My mother is going to be furious,” he lamented.

“You retreated to your room to regroup and think things over,” Damien said. “No one would blame you for that.”

“You are far too good at coming up with excuses,” Roman laughed, walking over to his bed. Damien sat down next to him and Roman sighed. “I admittedly don’t know how we’re going to pass the time without causing a ruckus and being found out.”

Damien glanced around. “I mean, you packed art supplies...and...at least one book,” he said, pointing to the nightstand. “I could read and you could draw, if all else fails.”

“True,” Roman sighed. He looked at the flower crown Damien was still wearing, and smiled. “I’m glad you like my little gift to you.”

“Of course,” Damien said, sounding almost offended. “It was a gift from you. Why wouldn’t I like it?”

Roman squeaked and turned cherry red. “Rude!” he sputtered.

Damien chuckled, arching an eyebrow. “I fail to see how that’s rude, but if I must repay you for that somehow, I suppose I will.”

Roman was struck with an idea and he grabbed his sketchbook and pencils. “Sit still, then, I want to draw you with your flower crown,” he said, flipping to a blank page in his sketchbook and beginning to get the basic shapes on paper.

Damien laughed, putting the back of his hand to his forehead. “Oh, woe is me! I have to sit still for five minutes while you sketch, I never should have agreed to this!”

Roman snickered and shook his head. “Well, that’s what you get for being rude!” he shot back.

“That wasn’t rude!” Damien laughed. “Rude would be doing a dramatic rendition of ‘Say Something’ using your hairbrush as the microphone just after you’ve gotten out of the shower.”

Roman laughed harder. “You’re so weird!” Roman declared, pointing his pencil at Damien. “That’s such an oddly specific example. Who did you do that to?”

Damien turned light pink and looked away. “No one in particular,” he said.

Roman squinted at Damien. He would have just admitted if it had been a boyfriend, and he had thick hair, but his father always kept his hair neat and it wasn’t nearly as curly as Damien’s, so he doubted it was his father. Roman’s eyes lit up and he giggled. “You did that to your mom, didn’t you?!”

“Shut up!” Damien hissed. “How was I to know she was in the shower in the hotel?”

“Uh, if you were sharing a hotel room, you definitely should have heard the water running,” Roman laughed. “And ‘Say Something’? Really? You would sing ‘Say Something’? That’s such a specific song!”

Damien huffed. “I was in my angst phase, all right?!” he defended. “And my mother ripped her hairbrush out of my hands, so her hair didn’t dry tangled!”

“That doesn’t make it better!” Roman crowed. “Oh, if you do that on our honeymoon, I will personally kill you. My hair is a mess enough without it getting all tangled after a shower.”

“Speaking of honeymoons...anywhere you want to go?” Damien asked. “I’m personally fond of the Meditteranian.”

“I kind of want to see Rome, and Italy in general for that matter,” Roman said with a shrug. “But the Carribean would also be nice. White beaches, blue skies, nothing but the open ocean for miles on a rental boat?”

“Hm, true,” Damien said. “The Carribean is lovely. How about this: we honeymoon in Italy, and for Valentine’s, I take you to the Carribean? Get away from the freezing winter.”

“You would do that?” Roman asked, eyes lighting up. “You’d take a vacation for a couple days just to go to the beach with me?”

“I’d make it two weeks if at all possible,” Damien said. “Just enough time for sun, sand, water, and maybe some fun inside, too, if you catch my drift.”

Roman gripped his pencil so hard he was surprised it didn’t snap in two. “Damien!” he exclaimed indignantly as Damien started snickering. “That is impossibly rude! Don’t get me thinking about those sorts of things when I’m trying to draw! It never ends well!”

“How does it end?” Damien asked.

“Usually with certain images drawn that should never see the light of day,” Roman said seriously, focusing on Damien’s nose in the drawing rather than looking up at Damien himself.

“I’d love to see those,” Damien said, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Maybe once we’re married,” Roman muttered. “But not before.”

“Oh, you wound me!” Damien exclaimed.

“The marriage is in three days, you doofus, you’ll live,” Roman said definitively.

Damien sighed. “...You know your mother is probably going to kill us both when she finds us.”

“Yep, trying not to think about that, thanks,” Roman said, continuing to draw.

“Do you have any plans for trying to get out of it?” Damien asked.

“Nope. I just figure she’ll yell at me for a while and then be done with it. She can’t call off the wedding at this point.”

“Why not?” Damien asked. “You said yourself that she arranged it, and you said it in front of half a dozen dignitaries. The secret’s out, my dear. They know it’s not a marriage of love, but of convenience.”

Roman sighed. “I choose to believe that she wouldn’t stoop so low as to cancel the marriage. She’s too desperate to have her perfect daughter.”

Damien frowned. “You know, I think it’s rather sad,” he mused. “She’s so desperate to cling to someone you never were that she’ll shove who you really are away. I know parents dream of their perfect children, who could never do a thing wrong in their life, and who are everything they want those kids to be and more, but...in the process of trying to preserve her daughter, she’s chasing away her son. I know that what she’s doing is inexcusable, and I know it hurts you, and of course, I’m not trying to defend her, but...that desperation...that sheer fear of the unknown that turns into bigotry and ignorance...it’s saddening to see.”

“Because she could be good, if only she opened her eyes and saw the error of her ways,” Roman agreed softly. “If she didn’t try to micromanage myself and Remus, and let us do what we wanted, be ourselves, explore who that really is without fear of judgement, she probably could have loved who we really are. Everyone who I talk to when I’m myself...when I’m not pretending to be Veronica? They say that I’m the happiest man they’ve ever seen. They say I’m full of life, that I’m energetic, that I light up a room when I enter it.

“That’s how I was when I was a kid, too. That’s what my mother is trying to cling to. But what she doesn’t realize is that when she saw a little girl, the reality was that I was being a little boy. I was being myself. And yeah, some more ‘feminine’ interests like art have stayed through the years, but...at the end of the day...I’m a man. I was being a little boy, getting dirty and scuffing my shoes and wearing my hair short and insisting on wearing pants and suits like Remus did. That wasn’t a little girl going through a rebellious phase, that was a little boy trying to get the world to agree that’s who he was.”

Damien nodded solemnly. “I don’t suppose explaining that to her would go over well?”

“I’ve tried. More than once. She never wants to hear it. She’s too wrapped up in her ideal little world to accept that life doesn’t always turn out the way she wants it to,” Roman said. “It’s beyond infuriating, but right now, I’m resigned to my fate. Three more days of pretending. And then hormones, surgery, therapy, the works.”

Damien’s lips twitched up. “If you keep focusing on the light at the end of the tunnel, you’ll be there before you know it.”

“I hope so,” Roman sighed.

“I know so,” Damien assured him. “Pretty soon no one in the world will be able to deny that you are a man. Not even your parents.”

“They’ll argue it anyway, because of what’s in my pants,” Roman sighed, making marks on the shading of his drawing.

“If we keep you hidden away for a couple months until the HRT kicks in, they won’t recognize you at first,” Damien suggested.

“As soon as we say my name they will,” Roman said, rolling his eyes.

“My love, by that point I will most likely have swords at your parents’ throats and if they misgender you they will lose their heads. Literally. I will not hesitate,” Damien said determinedly. “No one will be allowed to misgender you again.”

Roman felt his cheeks heat up and he couldn’t help but look away, finding Damien’s gaze to be far too intense. “I appreciate it,” Roman said. “Truly. I just wish that it weren’t a problem in the first place.”

“I know,” Damien tutted. His eyes drifted away from Roman and to the page Roman was signing. “Oh, wow,” he breathed. “My love, that is beautiful.”

Roman giggled a little. “It’s not my best work,” he admitted with some reluctance. “I am proud of it for the time I took, but it’s not the best. I will admit the flowers came out better than expected.”

“I can’t wait to see you draw more, so I can see the work you’re actually proud of,” Damien said. “Because this is incredible. The pieces you put time into must be heart-stopping.”

“Stop!” Roman whined. “Oh my god, you’re going to kill me at this rate! Don’t!”

Damien gently closed the sketchbook and put it on the nightstand, and removed Roman’s hands from his face so he couldn’t hide behind them. “My love, you can create the second most beautiful masterpieces in the world.”

“What’s the first?” Roman asked.

Damien smirked. “I think you know.”

“If you say me, I will kick you, and it will hurt,” Roman warned.

“If I said anything else I would be—oof!” Damien was cut off by Roman roughly kicking Damien in the jewels. “...Lying...ow...”

“Serves you right,” Roman huffed. “You’ve been nothing but rude to me all day with your compliments.”

Damien winced and tried to uncurl from his fetal position. “I had been informed that most boys generally liked being flirted with...”

“I’m not most boys,” Roman said simply.

“...You’re right. I should have taken that into account.” Damien took a deep breath through his nose and let out a sigh. “Okay. I’m not going to puke from that one kick, that’s progress.”

Roman offered Damien a smirk. “You’ve puked from that type of thing before?”

“Yes, although I was fairly young,” Damien admitted. “I told a girl I liked her brother and she screamed and kicked me, essentially gave me the shovel talk, and stormed off. Apparently Nate already liked a girl. And my giving him my bubblegum lollipop meant nothing.”

Roman laughed. “Oh, that’s priceless!”

Damien pouted. “Come on, giving up my bubblegum lollipop was a big deal! And he just took it and didn’t even say thank you!”

“Still hilarious,” Roman said, grinning.

Damien huffed. “I see how it is,” he grumbled.

“No, baby, come on, I love you,” Roman said, hugging him. “I just also love laughing at you.”

Damien continued to pout and grumble for a couple minutes, but Roman hugging him meant that the mood in the room wasn’t too dark.

Damien grimaced as his stomach growled. “It’s about lunch time,” he said. “But I anticipate we wouldn’t be allowed to sneak into the kitchen to avoid the dignitaries.”

Roman took off his and Damien’s flower crowns and placed them gently on the nightstand. “I’m willing to wait for an hour or so to try and sneak down.”

“That’s probably our best bet,” Damien agreed. “Until then...” he grabbed Roman’s hairbrush and said, “Care to duet?”

Roman laughed. “Sure, what song?”

“‘Say Something’?” Damien offered with a grin.

“Uh, maybe not,” Roman laughed. “What about ‘all the good girls go to hell’?”

Damien’s eyes lit up, “I love that song!” he declared, pulling out his phone and typing furiously. After a second, the song started to play, and Damien started singing into Roman’s hairbrush. “‘My Lucifer is lonely...’”

Roman belted out the lyrics along with Damien, and at some point during the song they wound up standing on the bed, dramatically posing to each line. By the end of the song, they were breathless and laughing, and Roman was beaming as Damien bit back a grin. “That was fun!” Roman exclaimed. “Another song?”

“Sure,” Damien agreed.

Roman scrolled through his phone, looking at what he had recently played, and he laughed. “Hey, want something ironic?” he asked.

“Always,” Damien said.

Roman played Lorde’s “Royals” and Damien burst out laughing as the beat started. They sang just as dramatically as before, Roman bouncing on his toes on the bed while Damien struggled to simply remain standing. Roman giggled as the song came to a close. “That was fun,” he said.

A knock sounded on the door and both his and Damien’s heads snapped to it as it swung open. Virgil walked in, looking furious. “There you are! Your Highnesses, the whole castle has been looking for you for two hours!”

Damien shrugged. “Roman was upset after confronting his mother. We came back here to talk and after a time we decided to have some fun just singing. Did you not think to look here until now?”

Virgil seethed. “I knew you two were still on the grounds, but that didn’t mean you two weren’t out of danger! Do you have any idea how much of a state your parents are in, Damien?!”

Damien slumped and shrugged. “Honestly, they should know that I do this sometimes, they should expect it, really.”

“Well, whether they did or didn’t this is the longest we’ve gone without finding you, and the two of you have to answer to them,” Virgil said sternly. “Out. Now.”

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