#I might quit for that alone cause I can't fucking stand those

[ya-gurl-emily]

The awesome thing about college is that being there is miserable, and not being there is worse.

Nifty!

[diazsdimples]

Tommy can remember the day he knew he was going to kill Vincent Gerrard. Or, not kill exactly, but do some serious, irreparable damage to him. He'd kind of figured this day would come, if the way he felt like ripping the old man's mustache right off his face whenever Buck came home upset was anything to go by. He just didn't think it would happen quite so soon. He's held Buck plenty of times after rough shifts, where Gerrard would make him man behind for no other reason than "I want this place clean and perfectly organized. That's what you people do, isn't it?". He's heard enough stories from Eddie, and Hen, and Chim, about the abuse they were all getting but how most of Gerrard's hellfire seemed directed towards Buck.

But nothing could prepare him for the fury he felt when that day arrived.

He'd gotten a text from Eddie, a short and simple "he needs you", and he'd been in his car in a flash. The whole drive he'd been worrying, not sure what he'd be arriving to.

When he gets there, he knows it’s bad. Hen and Chimney are locked in a furious screaming match with Gerrard, their faces all varying shades of puce, and it looks like Hen's about to punch Gerrard in the nose, based off the hand Chimney has wrapped tightly around her wrist.

He spots Eddie and Buck immediately; they're in the locker room and Eddie has his arm around Buck's shoulders. When he looks up and locks eyes with Tommy, he can see the flames of rage licking behind Eddie's eyes. Buck's got his face in his hands, and his shoulders are shaking in a way that tells Tommy that he's crying. Tommy's across the station in 3 quick strides, dropping to his knees in front of Buck and taking his face in his hands, stroking his thumbs over his cheekbones.

"What the hell happened?" he asks Eddie, because Buck's not in any shape to breathe right now, let alone talk.

Eddie doesn't reply immediately, but his jaw ticks and he looks like he's carefully picking his words. Just as he's about to speak, Buck's voice, quiet and broken, cuts through the silence.

"He made me watch."

Tommy's brow furrows in confusion, and a ball of dread settles in the pit of his stomach. Buck swallows convulsively and even Eddie looks like he might throw up. It's bad.

"Watch what?" Tommy asks carefully. He doesn't want to push it, not if Buck isn't up to speaking, but he needs to know.

Eddie speaks up first, and his voice is shaky too.

"We were called to a massive haemorrhage at the Pride Event in West Hollywood. A man and his husband had been attacked by one of those bible bashers that stand there and tell everyone they're going to hell. A bystander said they'd been arguing with him and he pulled a knife. Got the first guy in the stomach, second just above his heart. There was nothing we could do."

Buck takes a deep breath, a whine issuing from the back of his throat. Tommy puts a hand around the back of his neck and rubs soothing circles just below his hairline.

"He made me watch," Buck repeats again, a little louder this time, and Tommy's heart clenches cause he knows, he fucking knows what Buck is going to say next. "He said "ride with Wilson, Buckley. This is a good opportunity for you to increase your medic skills." He knew they weren't going to survive but he made me...." Buck trails off, unable to finish his sentence, and Tommy's vision goes red. He's never hated anyone more than he hates Gerrard right now.

That is, until Buck finishes his sentence.

"He said "you might learn something valuable," but he wasn't talking about the job."

Buck's fists are clenched so tight his knuckles are white, and there's blood under his fingernails. Eddie's got a fistful of Buck's shirt clenched tightly in his fist and he looks like he's doing all he can to not run upstairs and tear Gerrard limb from limb.

There's a ringing in Tommy's ears and everything sounds kind of muffled, like his head is underwater. He's clutching the back of Buck's neck so hard that it's got to be painful, but he can't make himself let go.

When he left the military, Tommy made a vow that he would never take another man's life. But for this - for Gerrard - for what he did to Buck, the light of Tommy's life, he might just make an exception.

[oval3000]

Chapter 3

Yandere Psych Patient König x Nurse Reader

Warning: Possesive, Obsession, Death, Gore, Blood, Smut, Toxic behavior, age gap.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

(This might suck idk. I don't know German so it's all Google translate)

-------------------------------------------------------

He hasn't left his room for a month. They kept him in their with the straitjacket on. His meals are just vitamins that he has to swallow. You would go in to check up on him, but new orders from the administrator's to not go near at all, so you pass by his room. You would peak through the little window and see him laying on his back with little no to motion on his arms or body entirely. His psychiatrist, Dr. Smith is the only that goes in there. They have sessions in his room instead of the usual spot they have it in.

She was pissed at everyone, specifically you. You are her punching bag, even though it was Ben's fault. "Why hasn't he been given his meds!" She yelled at you.

"We are not allowed to go i-" you tried to explain your her, but she could care less.

"You are his nurse right! Your job is to give him his meds! How did you graduate when you can't even do that!" She yelled at you.

You plead for her to listen to you "I'm sorry, Dr. Smith. I can't it's Mr. Millers orders. No one can go in except you because you are his psychiatrist."

So she strolled her way to the administrator's office.

Ignoring his assistant from telling her that she can't go in. Slaming the door open to see him sitting on his chair, writing whatever cral he writes on paper.

"Sarah calm down!"

"Do you have any idea how dangerous he is, and you want me to deal with him alone! On top of that the lack of guards is making my job harder!" Dr. Smith argued with a hand on her hips and her finger pointing towards Ben.

"Do you remeber when you wanted a nurse to look after him." She rolled her eyes. Yes, you, the nurse. "Do you have any idea how much money is going towards her. Triple the pay for looking after him."

Her hands swing in motion, showing her frustration. "She can't even do her fucking job Ben!"

"If she's alive, then she's doing her job well. What's making this hard, is you barging into my office and telling me what to do when you are the one demanding this." He stood up from his chair, fixing his navy tie. "We're loosing staff. People don't want to go near him. Gabriel is threatening to sue the company. Gaurds are quiting left and right so sorry that there aren't enough staff attending your needs."

She crossed her arms with an annoying sigh leaving her lips tinted with red lipstick. "Then hire more people, I don't see the problem?"

"Did you not hear what I said" he walked towards her, standing toe to toe to her. "Majority of our budget is going towards (Y/n). She's been here for two months now, lasting longer than any other nurses. We can't afford another hire with the same pay to deal with König. Besides he hasn't actually killed anyone in those two months, I'll take that than dealing with someone who has a broken jaw from a simple punch."

"Then ask for more money." She scuffed like if it was a joke she said.

He laughed at her face, "Do you think the government cares to fund more for this place, I already have the staff on my ass for new medical supplies, do you think they are gonna hand me the budget to hire someone with triple pay just because you are scared."

"Then fire (y/n) and hire a new guard, maybe someone with military experience."

"Why would I do that. You came into my office, spreaded your legs cause you were so desperate for a nurse and now you want me to fire her. She hasn't done anything in particularly wrong."

"She doesn't follow orders!"

"She does, you just make it difficult." He came in defense.

"Wasn't she trying to stop you from putting him into a straitjacket?" She smirked while her arms crossed at her chest.

"Yes, and she was right. Putting him in a straitjacket does nothing. He was fine it's just that..." he closed his eyes taking deep breath.

"Just what?" She came closer to him, placing her hand on his shoulder, gently caressing it.

He turned his head to her, he used to lovy dovey with her seduction, but now it's more annoyance. "Eli, the other guard, came to my office the other day and told me that Gabriel was provoking König."

She rolled her eyes, looking around his office. Paying attention to the paintings hanged up on the wall and the light objects he has on his desk. "Like what? Making fun of him? We all make fun the people here what else is new?"

"I don't know the full details, but that's what he told me." He sat a bit on his desk.

"Why does that matter?" She shook her head without a single thought in her brain.

"Gabriel is threatening to sue us. If we fight the legal action, we'll have to defend König. König, just like any other patient represent us, our care. If they find out that Gabriel was the one that caused this, making König the victim it doesn't look good after we placed him in the straitjacket. Like we silencing him out. It will ruin our reputation, we'll all loose our jobs and you fucked your way up here for nothing."

"But he harmed a worker, beside murdered multiple people." She let out a little chuckle, placing her hand on his chest.

He didn't give in, instead, he gave her a stare. "He's ex- military and as for you being his psychiatrist, you'll have to speak on behalf of him. Meaning that people will find out about you, how you never studied to become a doctor you fucked every professor you had to get your degree."

"What are you saying, Ben." Her smile dropped.

"I won't fire (Y/n). She stood up for König, making us look like we care about our patients. As for Gabriel, all he's asking is for some 20,000 thousand dollars, which we can easily give him worth than standing infront of the judge. Which means that we can't afford new guards for you. Besides they're taking off his straitjacket today, so stop being so scared and do your dam job."

"I still think you should fire, (Y/n) atleast." She hummed, wrapping her arms around his waist.

"I'm not doing that. Beside she's the only staff that doesn't barge in here demanding stuff. She nice and sweet...." he looked down to the side, " and...young and beautiful. "

She let go of his waist, clenching her jaw. Yes, you being so beautiful. "So what? You want to fuck her? Is that it. Never head young pussy before?"

"You should leave, I have work to do and so do you. This discussion is over." He walked to his desk, sitting down on his chair, unbutton his last few buttons from his dark, navy, blazer.

She stormed off his office, angrly stomping on the white tile floors with her heels creating a louder noise.

You heard the word going around that their taking of his straitjacket, so you quickly gathered what you need to check him up. You saw as the guards took off. He let out a big stretched, flexing more of his muscles. It caused a scare to the guards like a lion letting out a roar.

You walked up to and saw more of his face. He stared at you.

He missed you. He never thought he would miss you. During that month of not seeing you was a time he contemplated about you. Are you made for him or not. He will shut his eyes and images of you will pop up. You smiling at him. Taking good care of him. Watching you squirm under him as you take his full length cock inside your pussy. He'll treat you with respect as long as you do what he says that's all. Seeing your belly swell up with his baby. Can't wait to fuck your tits filled with milk. Can't wait to impregnate you with multiple of his children, making one big happy family. How protective he'll be for his kids, for you. To stand up to the bullies, to show them not to be scared of anything. To hold them if they cry.

He should kill you for making him react this way. He should just kill you. You are just another nurse thinking they have control over him. He use to give orders to people, being the colonel and all, he got the respect he fought for, why does he feel weak around you. You are so sweet and joyful to him. If he was back in the field and saw you, would he kill you. Or maybe fuck you. Maybe that's it. He hasn't done it in so long, so long he hasn't touch a women. He should've just fucked one of the other nurses. Yes, maybe he should do that. Fuck a nurse, just to see. I mean what's the harm in that.

"Aah...yes. right there ngh.... yes...oh fuck that feels good."

The sound of König's footsteps were low that they couldn't hear over the sound of skin slapping against eachother. Watching a men fucking his girlfriend on his bed.

"Does your boyfriend fuck you like this?" Slaming her ass back and forth on his cock.

"Ah....a-aah....he-..he could barley...make me- fuck!..mmgh....wet." She grip the bedsheets hard while he kept pounding her.

No. No. He can't. Not you. He can't. He can't betray you like they did. He can't imagine the face you'll make if you know he fucked another girl. No he should be pure to you. You should be the only one he touches.

He needs you. Okay, it's done. He'll make you his and you'll love him. You'll love him and care for him. Rather you like him or not it's done.

You wrapped the cuff around his bicep and squeeze the bulb reading the numbers on the circle, writing it down. Doing the usual things you have studied for. As you were checking his heartbeat, he reached up which caused you to flinch a bit. His index finger, gently, caressing your cheek. Your back was turned to the guards, making it hard them to see what's going. You stared at him as he touched you with such charisma. His thumb reaching to your chin, hovering over your lips. He placed the tip of his thumb on your bottom lip, gently pulling it out a bit.

You shouldn't have this feeling at the pit of your stomach. You couldn't tell of you didn't smack his hand away because you are scared or because you enjoy it. You never had this much attention, not like this.

"I don't have time to argue with you (Y/n)! Go to your room!" The little girl tuged at her moms shirt.

"Where's daddy?" She felt tears running down her face as her mother poured more wine into her glass, already finishing up the fresh new bottle.

"(Y/n)! Seriously go to room! You are such a headache! Why couldn't your father take you with him! Nauseating!" She dranked the entire glass, slamming the cup on the table.

"Where's daddy?" She said one last time not letting go of her blanket. The same blanket her father got her when she told him she was cold.

"HE LEFT! HE LEFT US (Y/N)! LEFT US FOR THAT BITCH! AND NOW I'M STUCK HERE WITH YOU. HE RUINED MY LIFE. I COULD'VE DONE SOOOO MANY THINGS! But no! I'm stuck to take care of a brat!"

He palmed your cheek, feeling your warmth. He went in closer to you. You could feel his hot breath, quicken as he got closer to your lips.

You pulled back, "I shouldn't- we shouldn't. I mean." You whispered to him.

"Mein liebling (my darling)." He whispered to you. The first time he spoke to you. You couldn't understand him, but he spoke to you. "Du bist mein (you are mine)." He pulled you closer to him, he didn't care if the guards were staring, if anything, he enjoys it. To show everyone that he is yours to touch. "Mein schatz (my sweetheart)," his lips were hovering yours, you felt a little tingle at how close he was.

You know this shouldn't happen. You turned your away from his. You walked back, feeling his grasp letting go. He stared at you witch a smile on his face. You saw the smile he gave you.

When your shift ended and went back to your apartment, the thoughts of what happened lingered into your mind.

That night, you couldn't sleep. He was in your dreams. What if you never pulled way. Were you really going to kiss him. You glazed over the parts where he touched you.

You searched the words he said to you to translate it. Sweetheart, darling, mine.

You felt the butterflies in your stomach again. You never felt so complicated before.

Having a crush on a patient.

You have a crush on König.

[strangersteddierthings]

ooo can i suggest prompt six? "Did you lie to me?" hehe

Thanks for sending a prompt, Nonny! It's my daily ficlet for today!

Daily Ficlet 6

Steve's never been a secret before. He's too likeable (or hateable) for that. He's never had to hide a relationship before because what girl wouldn't want to be with him? All his friendships are well known, or were, back when he was in high school. There weren't even secret rivalries!

So, it's an adjustment, keeping this thing with Eddie a secret. But he's trying. Even though all he wants to do is hold his hand every hour of every day he refrains because. Because?

Well, he's not really full on those details. He knows it's partially because Eddie isn't out to anyone in the group except Steve. He's not even out to Robin, and Steve thought for sure they'd figure each other out and bond over it but that hasn't happened yet. Eddie's also said something about keeping it to themselves so they can just be themselves, together, without other people. When Eddie had whispered that it had sounded so sweet and romantic. But that was, like, two months ago and it's.... it's still romantic, but Steve wants to ramble about how beautiful Eddie is to Robin.

Also! This secret keeping is causing Robin to worry! He can't keep secrets from Robin, he never has. He told Robin he thought he might like guys exactly 0.4 seconds after he'd realized it! In fact, he's so bad at secret keeping that he's told her he has a boyfriend. Won't say who, and Robin won't push. All he had to say was his boyfriend wasn't ready to come out and that was that.

He's out to the Party, too. Mostly as an accidental outing he didn't back down from even when Will offered him an out with his quick thinking. Jonathan knows, too. That was an on-purpose telling after Will came out to Steve when they were finally alone, and Steve learned Jonathan knew about Will.

Anyway. Steve's never been a secret before. He doesn't want to continue being one. He just wants Eddie's permission to tell Robin. He'll be fine with waiting even if Eddie says he's not ready for Robin to know, of course, but he just. He wants Robin to know who the amazing person he rants about is.

So, imagine his surprise when, halfway down the stairs to the basement at Eddie and Wayne's new house to talk to Eddie about telling Robin, he hears his name.

"-because it's Steve Harrington, y'know?" Gareth's voice floats up the stairs to Steve and he freezes. Is Gareth a goddman psychic!? How did he know Steve was here?

"That's your reasoning? Because it's Steve?" Eddie asks, and oh. They don't know he's here. They're talking about him. Steve should make himself known. He shouldn't just stand here and listen. But. Well, if Eddie's finally telling his friends about them, he kinda wants to hear it. Want to hear Eddie spill the secret so they can quit being so secretive.

"Well, yeah. You're the one who's always saying people don't change. Did you lie to me? To us? Has Steve changed?" That's Jeff's voice, and his questions make Steve gut twist. But Eddie's not Nancy. He's not- they aren't bullshit. Eddie knows that. He'll defend Steve. He'll tell them the truth. There's silence, though. Eddie doesn't defend him.

"What's with the silence?" Frankie asks, when Eddie's been quiet too long. Funny, Steve wanted to ask the same thing.

"I'm trying to not snap at you all," Eddie says, and he sounds angry. "I get that you guys might still be hesitant or whatever, but you don't get to come here and throw accusations when you haven't even tried to be friends with him! This is why I don't invite him to come hang out with us! 'Cause you can be a bunch of dicks sometimes!"

Steve feels a warmth bloom inside him. He knew Eddie would defend him, he did. It's just hard to believe sometimes, and he's not going to make that Eddie's problem. But hearing it. Hearing that Eddie does defend him even when he doesn't know Steve's around to hear it. Fuck, it makes him want to kiss Eddie so bad.

"Hey, man, I'm sorry," Jeff says, "you're right. We are being dicks, and pretty standoffish with Steve. We aren't giving him a fair chance."

"You're not!" Eddie agrees aggressively. "Even if he wasn't my b- my friend, he's still the reason I'm even fucking alive. So, respect that at least."

Steve stands at the midpoint of the stairs until the conversation turns to a different topic before he tiptoes back to the top of the steps to turn around and thunder down the stairs loudly, giving everyone in the basement a warning to his arrival.

He'll tell a lie, that he was driving around because he was bored and thought to stop and see what Eddie was up to, and get invited to stay and hang out. Eddie's friends are more open with him than they usually are and Steve doesn't waste the opportunity to try and really engage with them, get to know them.

He can be a secret just a little longer, he supposes, when he looks away from Jeff and catches Eddie staring at him with the same adoration he sees on Eddie's face when they're alone. And judging by the almost slip up earlier, Eddie might be getting closer to not being a secret, too.

[intimidating-fettuccine]

hi aubrie ^^

hope you're doing good today. as per my mistake in saturday I'm just feeling something hungry for crumbs about Jeff and little habits he does that are unique to him or a day to day with him as a s/o please.

i apologize again for sending the request on saturday. I hope you have a good morning and THANKS A LOT :))

att. number one aubrie fan

I'm glad you got it back in, and I hope you enjoy :) I decided to sort of combine your ideas.

Also to be fair, since I did this specifically for him and his s/o, if you just wanted to send in a question asking about a few habits of just his I'd be fine not considering that a request since it's just about him and not involving a s/o :p I think I've accepted questions for habits the creeps do and not counted them as requests

Living day-to-day with Jeff is probably more normal than one might expect. He tends to try and take things easy with you when he's spending time alone with you because the rest of his life tends to be a bit hectic and chaotic, so you're his nice, wonderful slice of domestic bliss that he can't help but constantly crave. He's developed a few habits with you over time in your relationship living side by side like this with you, some of them so subconscious he won't realize he has them unless you point them out to him directly, and some of which you can definitely tease him for.

One of those said habits is that every single time he has a rough or tiring day and he's on his way home to you he always texts you, "Snuggles? 🥺👉🏻👈🏻" every single time without fail. It doesn't matter what caused him to send it, it's just his codeword for saying he had a bad day and he wants you to cuddle the fuck out of him when he gets home because he's sad and you always make him feel better. If you're both at home and he's feeling a little sad, rather than texting you, he'll wait for you to walk into the room and pout at you with his arms stretched toward you while making grabby hands to get you to snuggle him. Jeff is handsy in general, and so one of his other habits, this one subconscious, is that if you're next to him he's going to fidget with you in some way. If you're sitting next to him, he's gonna be squeezing your thighs or wrapping his arm around you. If you're walking side by side, that arm is back around you or he's holding your hand and squeezing it in random patterns. If he's sitting next to you and bored he tends to pull your hand into his lap and play with it with both of his, rotating your hand around and playing with your fingers, just absentmindedly fidgeting with it, which is quite amusing to watch. The other creeps have also started teasing him for that one, as they always say they know when Jeff wants to leave and is done socializing because he's playing with your hand.

As I've said before, he makes it a habit to make you breakfast as often as he can, and he makes the best fucken pancakes. Another thing he does is that if he's starting to space out if he's standing behind you he'll spread out his legs and sort of bounce back and forth and start poking your back in random places while he does so. When he's spending time with you if the two of you see something even remotely cute he always points at it and very quickly says "That's you!" and if you try to counter him and say it's him instead he'll have a mini sassy argument with you over how it's obviously you, going back and forth with you. Also, absolutely randomly tickles you to try and catch you off guard, although he stops when you ask him to. He also encourages you to randomly tickle him as well to see if you can catch him off guard. When you're going to sleep together sometimes I think he likes to burrito you in the blankets, wrapping you up really tightly, and he'll just pull you between his legs so you're laying on his chest and he'll hold you and nuzzle into the top of your head or your neck and call you his little burrito or his little worm. He's also made it a habit whenever you're both going to bed to every night watch an episode or two of something with you so the two of you can watch new things together and just settle down together. He enjoys doing domestic things like that with you the most because it gives him some sort of semblance of normalcy amidst his very non-normal life, and that's one of the reasons he's so grateful to have you because you do that for him. He loves you so, so incredibly much, and he's so thankful to have you with him.

[honeybeezgobzzzzz]

𓅨 Sleepy Bitch Syndrome: Chapter Five

Sleepy Bitch Syndrome: You've got narcolepsy and have been visiting the Dreaming daily for years. Then its Lord and King finally return and he doesn't know quite what to think of you.

Warnings: Language.

To Note: Morpheus/Dream x Narcoleptic!Reader, for you dear @aralezinspace.

Word Count: ~2.4k

Previous | Masterlist | Next

You find yourself in the cold, sterile room of the sleep clinic. The bed beneath you feels foreign, the sheets crisp and unfamiliar. Electrodes cling to your scalp, chest, and limbs, tethering you to the machines that will monitor your every twitch and breath.

"You ready?" the technician asks, her voice breaking through the clinical quiet. Her eyes are kind but professional, revealing none of the potential outcomes of this study.

"As ready as I'll ever be," you reply, trying to keep your tone light despite the anxiety gnawing at you.

The lights dim, and you're left alone with the soft hum of machinery. You close your eyes, willing sleep to come quickly, but it evades you for a while. Eventually, exhaustion takes over and pulls you under.

You drift into a dreamscape that's unsettlingly familiar—Mervyn's garden. The flowers bloom in impossible colors, their petals shifting like liquid in a breeze that doesn't exist. Morpheus appears again, standing among the blossoms, his expression unreadable.

"Why here?" you ask, more to yourself than to him.

"Your mind seeks comfort," he replies. "And yet it brings you back to chaos."

The scene shifts suddenly. You find yourself back in the sleep clinic bed but not alone. Matthew perches on the headboard, his dark eyes watching over you.

"You think they got what they needed?" he asks casually.

"Doubt it," you mutter. "Feels like a whole lot of nothing."

Morning arrives too soon, dragging you from restless slumber into harsh reality. The technician re-enters the room with a clipboard in hand and a neutral expression.

"How'd I do?" You force a smile, hoping for some clarity.

"We'll discuss it with Dr. Andrews," she says. Her tone is too measured to offer any hints.

You're led to a small consultation room where Dr. Andrews awaits with your chart spread out before him.

"Your results are... inconclusive," he says after a moment's hesitation. "We didn't find anything definitive."

You let out a sigh of frustration. "So what now?"

"We'll need to run more tests," he continues. "Your symptoms are real; we just haven't pinpointed the cause yet."

You nod numbly as he explains next steps—more nights in strange beds with electrodes glued to your skin, more waiting for answers that might never come.

As you leave the clinic, Matthew swoops down from somewhere above and lands on your shoulder again. It still astounds you that he can travel between realms, but you are eternally grateful to have his company during your waking hours.

"Guess it's back to square one," he remarks.

"Yeah," you agree softly. "But at least it hasn't gotten worse… you wanna get food?"

"Fuck yeah,"

"How about that diner on Fifth?" you suggest. "They've got outdoor seating. I can pretend that you're a pet"

Matthew ruffles his feathers in approval. "Sounds good. You know I can't resist those fries."

You make your way through the crowded sidewalks, dodging commuters and street vendors until you reach the small, retro-style diner. The smell of sizzling bacon and fresh coffee hits you as you approach, and your stomach growls in anticipation.

You find a table outside, under the shade of a striped umbrella. A waitress with a bright smile brings menus and fills your cup with steaming coffee.

"I'll have the breakfast special," you say, glancing at Matthew. "And can we get an extra side of fries?"

The waitress nods and scribbles down your order before disappearing back inside.

"So," Matthew starts, pecking lightly at a napkin for amusement, "how do you feel about all this? The tests, I mean."

You lean back in your chair, taking a sip of coffee. "Frustrated, mostly. It’s like being stuck in a loop with no exit."

Matthew tilts his head, studying you. "But you're not giving up."

"Never," you reply firmly. "I need answers."

The waitress returns with your food—a plate piled high with scrambled eggs, bacon, toast, and a generous serving of fries on the side. She places everything down with a practiced ease and leaves you to it.

You break off a piece of toast and hold it out for Matthew. He pecks at it gratefully before turning his attention to the fries.

"Here," you say, picking up a fry and holding it close to his beak.

He takes it delicately, munching away with visible delight. "Best part of any meal," he quips between bites.

You smile, feeling a small sense of normalcy amidst the chaos that has become your life. Sharing a meal with Matthew distracts you—no doctors, no tests, just the simple act of eating together. Even he is a bird.

"Want some bacon?" You hold up a piece for him.

"Nah," he replies. "Too greasy for my bird stomach, you would not believe how much I had to shit after snacking on measly strip…” You try not to think about Matthew having bird diarrhea while you chew your bacon eyes wandering over the bustling cityscape. People pass by in waves, unaware of your silent struggles. Matthew’s presence brings a small measure of comfort. The bird’s casual attitude toward your predicament eases the tension you carry like an invisible weight.

Matthew finishes another fry and cocks his head at you. "You think they'll find anything useful next time?"

You shrug, swallowing a bite of scrambled eggs. "I hope so. It’s hard not knowing what’s wrong. But at the same time, how many tests have I already been though? Pretty sure they're gonna start running out and just chalk it up to me being crazy."

"Well at least you’ve got me," he says with a wink—or as much of a wink as a bird can manage.

You chuckle, the sound surprising even to you. It feels good to laugh, even if just for a moment. "Yeah, I do. Thanks for sticking around…" Then you think about it. Why is Matthew hanging out with you while you are awake?

"Matthew?" You question, catching the raven mid gobble of another fry.

You look at Matthew as he swallows the fry, his beady eyes glinting with curiosity. “Why do you stick around when I’m awake?”

He pauses, feathers ruffling slightly. “Good question,” he says, his voice taking on a thoughtful tone. “Maybe I just enjoy your company.”

“Come on,” you say, leaning forward. “There’s gotta be more to it than that.”

Matthew pecks at another fry, taking his time before responding. “Alright, alright. The boss told me to watch you, okay?"

The boss? Why would Morpheus care about your well being?

You stare at Matthew, his nonchalance doing little to mask the gravity of his revelation.

"The boss? Morpheus asked you to watch over me?"

Matthew's beady eyes meet yours, and he nods slowly. "Yeah, he did. Said you were important."

"Important? To who?" You lean in, your heart pounding in your chest. Did he still think you were a threat? "What does he mean?"

Matthew looks around, ensuring no one else is listening. Then he leans closer, lowering his voice conspiratorially. "Alright, but you gotta promise not to freak out."

You nod, the curiosity gnawing at you. "I promise."

"Okay," he says, settling himself on the table. "So, I think Morpheus has a crush on you."

Your eyes widen in disbelief. "What? That's... that's insane."

Matthew shrugs, picking at another fry. "Is it? Think about it. Why else would he send me to keep an eye on you?"

You try to process this information, but it's like trying to catch smoke with your bare hands. "But he's... he's the Lord of Dreams, and Endless. He's older than the gods. Why would he care about me?"

"Hey," Matthew pecks at the table for emphasis, "he's more human than you think. Just because he's got all that power doesn't mean he doesn't have feelings."

"Matthew, he has the emotional intelligence of a rock."

Matthew cocks his head, a twinkle of amusement in his beady eyes. "Maybe. But even rocks get polished over time."

"Oh my god, this conversation is ridiculous," you sigh in exasperation, shaking your head.

Matthew chuckles, a surprisingly comforting sound. "Ridiculous or not, it's the truth. Why else would he send me to watch over you?"

"Because I am an interloper within his realm he can't control?" You offer shortly before chewing your lip. You take a deep breath, trying to make sense of everything. "So, what now? Do I just... pretend I don't know?"

Matthew shrugs, fluffing his feathers. "That's up to you. But you should know, he's not just watching over you for no reason. He genuinely cares."

You nod slowly, the gravity of the situation settling over you. "Alright. I'll think about it."

Matthew pecks at another fry, giving you a reassuring look. "Take your time. Just know that whatever you decide, I'm here. And so is he. I think."

He thinks. Hah!

" Great talk," You say, not knowing what else to say. "Thanks, Matthew."

"Anytime," he replies, his tone light and playful. "Now, how about we get back to those fries?"

You wander through Fiddler's Green, your eyes scanning the landscape for the perfect spot to set up your painting supplies. The rolling hills are lush with emerald grass, dotted with wildflowers that seem to glow in the afternoon sun. Trees sway gently in the breeze, their leaves whispering secrets you can almost hear.

A narrow path winds through the meadow, leading you toward a small pond. The water reflects the sky like a mirror, capturing every cloud and beam of sunlight. You pause for a moment, taking in the serenity of the scene. It's almost too beautiful, too perfect—like a dream within a dream. Enough about that dream fuckery, this isn’t Inception…

You walk a bit further and find an old oak tree with sprawling branches that provide ample shade. The roots twist and curl around each other, forming natural seats. You set down your canvas and easel, unrolling your brushes and paints with practiced ease.

The quiet of Fiddler's Green wraps around you like a comforting blanket as you dip your brush into a vibrant blue. You begin to paint the sky, each stroke bringing the scene to life on your canvas. The colors blend and dance under your hand, capturing the essence of this magical place.

"Nice choice," a voice says behind you.

You turn to see Gilbert standing there, his ever-present book tucked under his arm. His eyes twinkle with approval as he takes in your setup.

"Thanks," you reply, smiling. "It's hard not to be inspired here."

Gilbert nods, stepping closer to examine your work. "You've got quite the talent," he observes. "Capturing the spirit of this realm isn't easy with its ever shifting state."

You shrug modestly, focusing on adding detail to a distant tree. "It's all about finding the right moment," you say. "The way the light hits the water or how the flowers sway in the breeze."

He watches you for a moment longer before sitting down on one of the gnarled roots. "Do you ever feel like you're painting more than just what you see?"

You glance at him curiously. "What do you mean?"

"Well," he says thoughtfully, "it's like you're capturing the very essence of this place—the dreams and hopes it represents."

You consider his words as you continue to paint, adding layers of color and depth. Maybe he's right. Maybe you're not just painting what you see but also what you feel—the peace and tranquility that Fiddler's Green offers.

As you lose yourself in your work, Gilbert's presence becomes a comforting backdrop. He doesn't need to say anything more; his quiet support speaks volumes. You don't notice when Gilbert fades, returning to his disembodied state as Fiddler's Green.

You lose yourself in the flow of colors and brushstrokes, the world around you fading into a blur of creativity. The air hums with the energy of Fiddler's Green, each breeze carrying the scent of blooming flowers and fresh grass. It's as if the very essence of The Dreaming seeps into your painting, making it come alive on the canvas.

A shadow falls across your work, and you look up to find Morpheus standing beside you. His presence is as commanding as ever, his dark eyes studying your painting with an intensity that makes your heart race.

"You paint," he states, his voice a soft murmur that seems to resonate through the meadow.

You nod, feeling a bit self-conscious under his gaze. "I'm not really that good," you admit. "But this place is too beautiful not to try."

Morpheus tilts his head slightly, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips. "Beauty often inspires creation," he says, stepping closer. "May I?"

You swallow hard and nod again, handing him the brush with trembling fingers. His touch is cool but not unpleasant, but rather than fully take the brush, he stands behind you, close enough that you can feel the faint rustle of his robes against your back.

"Relax," he instructs softly. "Let the moment guide your hand."

His fingers gently cover yours, guiding the brush across the canvas with fluid, confident strokes. The colors seem to blend more harmoniously under his direction, each line and curve coming together to form a more cohesive whole.

"See how the light plays on the water?" he murmurs, his breath warm against your ear. "Capture that essence—the way it dances and shimmers."

You try to focus on his words, on the way his hand moves with yours, but it's hard to ignore how close he is to you. His presence is overwhelming yet comforting, grounding you in a way you haven't felt in a long time.

"Art is not about perfection," Morpheus continues, his voice a soothing melody. "It's about capturing what lies beneath the surface—the emotions and dreams that shape our reality."

You take a deep breath, letting his words sink in as you follow his lead. The painting begins to transform before your eyes, becoming something more than just an image on a canvas. It feels alive, imbued with the very spirit of The Dreaming.

Morpheus steps back after a few moments, leaving you to finish on your own. His eyes meet yours, filled with an unreadable expression.

"You have more talent than you realize," he says softly.

You look at him, feeling a warmth spread through your chest at his words. "Thank you," you whisper.

He inclines his head slightly in acknowledgment before fading back into the landscape, leaving you alone once more with your painting and thoughts.

The colors on your canvas seem brighter now, more vivid—a testament to the brief but intense moment you've just shared with Morpheus. Your brain glitches and a solid blue screen appears behind your eyes, serenity is replaced with panic.

Shit. Matthew is right.

Date Published: 8/7/24

Last Edit: 8/7/24

Previous | Masterlist | Next

[bonny-kookoo]

Hihi! Really really like your [I Like You] couple, tihi. I just wanted to know who asked who our first, and how that went? Like was it an immediate thing, or did they go on dates first, were they friends who grew to like each other romantically?

Much love <3

- 🔭

(AN: I kind of escalated a little bit.. pls I love them both so much)

-> Masterlist

"Your eyes might fall out, kook." Taehyung jokes, making Jimin perk up from his breakfast as he looks over to what Jungkook might just be staring at like this. He's almost stopped chewing after all- food entirely thrown into the background at the sight of-

Oh.

"Hey, I know those pink bra straps!" Jimin laughs, getting up with his empty plate towards where you're standing, searching for what you might want to eat. At the sight of Jimin next to you you're surprised, before you start to smile so brightly Jungkook feels like he's watching the sun rise, just in a human body.

"Jimin and her went to the same University." Taehyung explains as Jungkook finally averts his gaze- especially when Jimin points at him. "She's pretty much his best friend. Just.. she can be a bit much." He chuckles.

"Does she have a boyfriend?" Jungkook wonders innocently, and Taehyung laughs. "Ah- wait no, I was asking if Jimin and her-" He starts, panicking, when his friend reassures him.

"No, they're not a thing, and neither are they interested in each other." Taehyung explains. "They're more like siblings, really."

"Oh." Jungkook simply says, before he looks back to the breakfast buffet-

Only to be faced with your face, pretty eyes staring right at him, making him almost fall from his chair as he leans back in surprise. "You're right, he IS cute!" You giggle, before pulling a chair from a different table besides his, sitting down with your plate. It's filled with fruits and many other things, telling him a little story about your personality already.

"Well, thanks for asking, I'm doing great, how are you?" Taehyung jokes, and you flip your hair over your shoulder, a wave of strawberry scented shampoo hitting Jungkook next to you.

It makes him nervous. You're so fucking pretty- he feels like he's already got a crush. On a girl that's absolutely out of his reach, of all things.

"I'm still mad at you for not picking me up last week like you promised." You huff at your friend across, picking up a piece of fruit from your plate. "So be glad I'm acknowledging your existence right now, peasant." You boldly say, making Jimin laugh. "Anyway, Jimin said your name is Jungkook?" You ask the young man next to you, who's entirely frozen like a prey in front of the predator hoping to stay unseen in the eyes of certain death.

"Come on, I said sorry-" Taehyung starts, but you whip your head towards him, hissing him into silence.

"Psst, I'm talking to Jungkook right now, can't you see?" You scold, before turning back towards the man in question. "Do you have a girlfriend?" You wonder, and Jungkook is entirely lost by now.

"...uh-" He stammers, before he shakes his head. Taehyung didn't lie- you're a lot.

"Heh, awesome." You chirp happily, before resuming to eat your food, not seemingly initiating anything else as you instead chat to Jimin and Taehyung about their trip- and why you're at the same hotel. "Oh, I kind of wanted to go here anyways." You shrug. "Took some time off work, and booked the flight and hotel."

"Isn't it.. a bit dangerous?" Jungkook quietly chimes in. "..to travel alone, as a woman, I mean." He wonders, unable to quite look at you- mainly cause he doesn't want you to think he's staring at what the cropped top reveals of your chest.

"Aww, a gentleman too!" You sigh, looking at Jimin. "Where the fuck did you hide him?" You scold.

"I didn't hide him, he hides himself!" Jimin laughs, and you giggle as well- and Jungkook feels a little odd. Like he's the butt of the joke, right now- so he falls silent, instead looks down onto his plate. He knows his friends and you don't mean to make him feel bad, probably.

It's his own fault for being so sensitive.

Suddenly, a small fork pokes at the cube of watermelon on his plate, and he looks up to see you looking at him with kind eyes, and a hint of worry. "You okay?" You wonder, voice a lot softer, and Jimin sighs, earning your attention back as you look at him.

"He's just a bit shy, don't worry." Jimin tries to reassure. "It's why we've been taking him along. He needs to get out a bit." He jokes, but you softly hit his shoulder suddenly, leaning a bit towards Jungkook instead.

"First of all I didn't ask YOU, second of all stop making him feel bad, you insensitive fuck." You huff, turning back towards Jungkook. "Blink twice if you're being held hostage." You ask him jokingly dramatic, having to look upwards a bit, and he can't help but notice how long your lashes are.

And also, how you've noticed the shift in his emotional state so quickly.

So he smiles a bit, shakes his head, and you grin back happily. "Do you guys rent a room here too, or?" You wonder, but Taehyung shakes his head.

"We wanna go camping, today and the rest of the week, so we rented an RV." He informs you, and you visibly deflate at that.

"Aww, I hate not having a driver's license." You mumble, stealing a cube of watermelon from Jungkook's plate. "I wanna go camping too. Make marshmallows and like, play Uno so I've got a reason to hit Jiminie.." You dream around, cheek resting into your palm.

"Hey!" Jimin barks offended, and Taehyung laughs.

"I mean, we could take you for one night, if you'd like?" He wonders, and suddenly, everyone looks at Jungkook.

"What?" He asks, and you blink once.

"I guess the unsaid question is: Are you okay with that?" You clear up, and Jungkook shrugs.

"..yeah, I don't know." He mumbles, putting another cube of watermelon on your plate which you happily accept. "I don't mind." He accepts, and you jump up at that.

"I'll go pack my shit!" You exclaim, before leaning over to steal the last watermelon cube that's stuck on Jungkook's own fork with your mouth, dashing away to do what you've said you would, leaving the poor guy to stare at his empty fork for a moment.

Taehyung and Jimin stay behind looking at Jungkook with suspicious smiles, making the youngest of the group blink with big eyes.

"What?" He asks again, and both shake their heads.

"Nothing." They respond with in unison.

Jungkook remembers that on that day, at this random hotel in New Zealand, something began that he could only describe as fate. Like he'd met his soulmate but didn't know it yet- because he'd only really realize it some months later when you're over at his apartment, sitting on his couch, cuddling up to him while you watch 'The Cat Returns' on his TV.

He's to this day not sure how he's been so at ease with letting you so.. physically close to him so quickly. You've stuck to him like glue from the very start, and he's never really felt uncomfortable with it.

Because your touch is kind, and soft, and you never try and hurt him. Neither with your hands, nor with your words, and never with your actions either.

You treat him with care, but you never belittle him either.

"Jungkook?" You ask suddenly, while Baron holds Haru in his arms on TV.

"Hm?" He wonders, watching the scene unfold on the screen in front of him, while you play with the sleeve of his shirt.

"I wanna go out with you." You say, and he looks down at where you're laying on his chest.

"Right now? It's-" He looks at the clock in his kitchenette. "-2 in the morning-"

"No, like, I wanna be together with you." You say. "In a relationship. Kiss and fuck you. Be all lovey-dovey with you." You try and clarify, and his eyes widen.

"...why?" He asks, unsure, and you shrug.

"Cause I like you. And you seem to be pretty cool with me too, so why not?" You wonder, and he's got to think about those words for a moment.

Why not?

There's nothing speaking against it. He does actually like you, feels oddly comfortable with you close like this- he can see himself possibly happier than he's ever been with you at his side. The only problem would be, that he's scared.

Not scared of you- but scared of what he might do to you.

He's known for lashing out when feeling threatened- not physically, but with words. He always holds people at an arm's length, never lets them close enough, always makes sure he can push them away without ending up hurt if he needs to. It's cruel, but it's how he was raised. How he grew up.

'Never get attached to people'.

And yet, when he looks at you like this, with eyes that show no threat whatsoever, he can't help but want to make an exception for you. So he nods.

Agrees.

And as you sit up on his legs, and hold his cheeks in your palms with the biggest grin on your face, he knows he's done the right thing.

Because your lips on his feel just as sweet as your cherry flavored Chapstick tastes.

[herblay]

Every Track in Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess and which BNHA character it is about.

Yeah that's right I did a bad one about Charli XCX songs and I'm here with ANOTHER atrocity but this time I'm desecrating Chappell Roan our lord and savior I'm sorry. It's out of love. But also a hot mess. And I'm drinking wine alone because I wasted a Sunday night on a first date and I did NOT jive with the gal (she kept talking about her ex help meeeeeeee). Just to #setthescene

Femininomenon: Uraraka Ochako. WHY CAN'T ANY MAN? I love lesbians man. I love lesbians so much. And Ochako you're my favorite as of yet undetermined wuh luh wuh. Love women who like women. And like. Yes. Also again Uraraka is THE Femininomenon. We need her.

Red Wine Supernova: Kirishima Eijirou. I just think he would be on this song. Also his hair! And the vibes! The cool roommates! Didn't quite think it through! I just think he fits! Honorary lesbian! I adopt him into lesbianism!

After Midnight: Shinsou Hitoshi. I also can't explain this one besides "I love a little drama/Let's start a bar fight" being very MonoShin coded and I think Shinsou would be more lighthearted about that. And the spoken part is very command. I like this for him. And it fits the vibes of those two. I love them.

Coffee: Sir Nighteye. He's singing about All Might. I'm crying. Me too bestie! I'm unwell! I love my divorced fathers!

Casual: THEEEE Dabi Hawks anthem and I will not hear otherwise! We kiss I have anger issues! Knee deep in the passenger seat! I love this song it goes so fucking hard and so do they! They are not telling their friends all the details! It's embarrassing and they cannot help themselves!

Super Graphic Ultra Modern Girl: Asui Tsuyu. WE DON'T DESERVE HER! She is my goat! And everyone was hyper mega bummer and did not treat her as she deserved that one time (I'm still mad about how they hurt my girl's feelings at Kamino Ward). I love her, they should all get on her level! (But also I know) (I KNOW) (Present Mic sings this to Aizawa all the time when he's feeling like messing with him) (I support him)

HOT TO GO!: Jirou. Sung to Momo. And it's adorable. It's wonderful. It's perfect. They are all lesbians because I SAID SO damnit. STAND AND CLAP NOW TOUCH YOUR TOES! (The really sick part of me said hot to go is about Dabi but that's just a mean joke how could I ever make it oh wait I just did)

My Kink Is Karma: Todoroki Shouto. Given how he is about his dad! I support a petty queen and Shouto is nothing but a petty queen and this song is about PETTY QUEEN RIGHTS. No need to be hateful in ur fake Gucci sweater because Shouto is doing all the hating in his REAL one u posers.

Picture You: Bakugou Katsuki late late in the narrative about Midoriya Izuku. Because like come on now. Come on now. "It's ritualistic" "I need you around" "Am I in the frame from your point of view?" like COME ON this is about THEM this is FOR BAKUGOU about his DEKU. I'm still wrecked from them. Horikoshi please.

Kaleidoscope: Midoriya Inko. I love her. She deserves better. And the absence of her man, the way she loves Izuku unconditionally no matter what on any terms he wants. Yes Kaleidoscope is a romantic song to an extent but the parental version of it or even just the abstraction of love in general. It's beautiful and unconditional and not always perfect but it's always there and that's what matters. Anyway. I ugly cry to this song. My best friend played it for me on a uke and sang it the other day and I was an ugly wreck. And I am a wreck for Inko because she's such a good and honest person and genuinely does her best for her son. Wow. I'm sniffly.

Pink Pony Club: This is obviously Izuku Midoriya. About quirks ofc, but like the kind of joyous wide eyed earnestness of it all. It's so him. It's so fucking Deku it is perfect. Keep on dancing baby. Have your fun. The joy of it all, the self acceptance, the finding a place of belonging. It's HIM. A year to cause a scene? YES BABY.

Naked In Manhattan: Momo Yaoyorozu. I struggled for this one babes! I did! HOWEVER I do think my sheltered girlie deserves a song about self discovery and fun and GIRLS. I am always on this shit. I will do this for my girlies. They're all lesbians u can't take this from me. The other fun option is David Shield with All Might in their #collegehomosexualrevelries aka when All Might was in the states. I love them. They're a great fling.

California: Shigaraki Tomura. Or Yoichi. Or really any of the OFA holders about their predecessors. Just that hope to get their dreams only to have themselves fail to reach them and it hurts even if it's through no fault of their own. Man. I want them to be happy dawg. But mostly Shigaraki because. Yes. Him and the LOV. Man. "I miss the seasons in Missouri/My dying town/Thought I'd be cool in California/I'd make you proud/To think I almost had it going/I let you down"

Guilty Pleasure: The later, better, more fun DabiHawks song. "I want this like a cigarette" SO TRUE. I love those two lmao they're one of my favorite relationship dynamics. "Some good girls do bad things too" okay girlies you can dream. I love them. They're so fun. Also you can't tell me Hawks wouldn't absolutely go ham on the yodels during karaoke.

ANYWAY TY FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK IT BANGS IT GOES SO HARD I LOVE THIS ALBUM I HOPE ALL OF U ARE YODELING. Please listen to this whole album. Man. I love this album. It goes so fucking hard. It's a pop banger.

[dirtytransmasc]

Ok

Ok

Hear me out

Miles!42 and Uncle Aaron!42 developing, rather unwillingly, a pretty protective attitude over Miles.

For Miles!42, it's brotherly. He starts viewing Miles as his kid brother.

For Uncle Aaron!42, it's that he sees the kid his Miles used to be before Jeff died and feels he failed to preserve or truly protect.

Miles (42) is so protective, and at first he hates it, cause loving anyone as much as he finds he has begun to love miles, outside of your blood (because this kids worldview is so skewed, I feel like only his mom and his uncle are "safe") is a weakness, a danger, and fuck, he doesn't want to let anyone in ever again. but Miles seems so small and young and almost fragile, in a way that is neither physical or mental, but something else he can't quite place, and he just wants to protect him. its those eyes, still trusting, still warm, but the flame is starting to flicker, and for reasons unknown to him, it makes Miles (42) feel sick. all he did was look at him, he'd broken his chains, taken Miles (42) out, pinned him with his webs, but still his eyes leaked trust and longing, even under the pain and fear. that's when part of him decided Miles (1610) was his brother, that he was something to be protected, that he might as well be blood.

then Miles (1610) begged for the chance to save his dad, their dad, and offered Miles (42) a way out, a hand, into the light, a second chance with his dad. he realizes he doesn't feel alone anymore, like he's in a world where despite having his uncle and his mom, at the end of the day, he was alone; now he has his brother, and he won't let him turn out like him, he won't let that flame die, he won't let him go cold, because he needs him.

so while it is terrifying, he lets Miles (1610) in, he protects him, not just in a physical manner, but emotionally too, even if he isn't the best at it. he makes sure even when they're both trapped in the darkness, with the odds against them, isolated from their worlds, that he feels loved and safe, cause that's what a big brother does.

in short, Miles (42) will kill for Miles (1610), he'll go up against all of spider society, his uncle (in the context of him not being protective of him, which isn't where this post is going, but you get the point), anyone, because his brother will not be alone in the world anymore, dependent on ever-shifting variables as to whether or not he has someone standing behind him. in a way, its easy, even when scary and he doesn't know what to do, he just lets instinct guide him.

the same can't be said for Aaron. seeing Miles (1610) hurts his very soul. he's forced to see how badly he has hurt his Miles, even if it was necessary for their survival, to see the softness that's been stolen from his miles, the warmth, the gentleness, its all been taken away. Miles (1610) is like a second chance, he couldn't save his miles, but he can save this one, and in the process, maybe his own, in away, if already too late to really save him.

he has a harder time connecting with Miles (1610) but he tries, tries to give the kid some sort of reprieve from the grief of losing his own uncle, much like Jeff is giving Miles (42) reprieve from the grief of losing his dad, he tries to soften for both boys, but unfortunately, he's damaged, and his idea of protection isn't as soft, it hasn't been in so long, since he lost Jeff. he tries to be tough on the kid, while also not squashing the good in him, trying to find the balance the failed to find with Miles (42). he's scared of losing the kid, losing his Miles in the process, hell, he's scared of losing himself. he's been terrified of losing his own Miles for so long, he's not sure if he could lose two of them. what's scarier, is like Miles (42), he's losing his edge to the kid,.

so he kinda lurks behind the boys, letting them remain soft and somewhat off gaurd, happy, kids, while he makes sure they're safe. his apartment is open to both of them, but he lets Miles (42) fly the coop, more than ever before.

eventually he would accept that maybe, just maybe, he can let himself soften, that he can be more for his boys than just a scary protector.

Aaron knows he failed once, but doesn't know how to help, doesn't know how to give them the softness they deserve, and once he does, he's scared of it. he wants, needs, to protect them, to protect Miles (1610) so he doesn't become like his Miles, to protect his Miles from losing anymore of himself. in his efforts, he'll fuck up, many a time, sometimes he thinks he's done more harm than good, but he knows, even if both his boys hate him, he will protect them from the world, its the very least he could do.

both of them would do anything to protect Miles (1610), because he's practically blood, but he's also a physical representation of everything they've lost, and they won't lose it again. plus, big brothers are notoriously overprotective, and the same goes for uncles turned father figures.

[burinazar]

...

this is the last time i'll talk about the kpop mia thing i promise. i pinky promise. just have to get this off my chest. (post contains mentions of Unpleasant fanservice elements with underage characters in other shows, not terribly detailed but they are described.)

Imagine if every time someone said they liked Gainax’s beloved mecha classic Gunbuster everyone who heard them assumed it was specifically because of that one locker room scene that is in there more prominently than the scenes of nudity in MiA and feature more visible, more detailed, and more prolonged underage nudity and quite unambiguously exists for the sake of titillation alone

imagine if mentioning you were a Fate fan caused everyone to think you were watching it for the little girls making out in Prisma Ilya or the microbikini-clad underage version of Jack the Ripper in FGO. or saying you liked Gurren Lagann immediately caused people to come running with that one interview where a staff writer randomly said Yoko is 14 while most of the merchandise featuring her is heavily focused on sexualization and fanservice, retroactively rendering the show's many many fanservice scenes with her highly questionable for reasons lying totally outside its established canon

or to take a break from objectionable sexualization even though that's the internet's favorite subject: what if every LOGH fan was assumed to share Tanaka's potential tendency of according validity of Great Man Theory or take an uncritical view of the authoritative military autocracies like the one Reinhard establishes amid a mostly positive framing in the story. there are definitely fans that do this by the way but good lord i can't imagine someone assuming the entire fandom does instead of being prone to creating many healthily-critical diatribes questioning the above, even alongside our great love of the characters of the story and the overall work

like nobody assumes these things because it’s widely agreed there’s lots of other good shit in there for all of those shows, and many fans enjoy them without liking and thumbs-upping everything in it. so can you give us Giant Hole Show Liker People that bare minimum of consideration. huh.

like. man. i’m not out here standing by everything in MiA as something I am pleased is in it — like, fucking duh i’m not, since everyone who’s heard me rant about how the otherwise consistent and fantastically delineated theme of “condemning and inspecting a world that exploits innocents for its advancement and those who partake in this” is veritably kneecapped by some of s1’s dumbass lolisho fanservice moments (that Tsukushi just haaaad to throw in, where trauma and humiliation is thrown into casual everyday life montages and brushed off as funny-sexy), knows perfectly well how i feel about them.

but I’m so so tired of people not affording the fans any consideration that we might like The Fucking Rest Of It when there’s way more mainstream things with worse-or-as-bad elements of underage fanservice whose fandom isn’t assumed to be there primarily for the worst bits of fan service.

like can you just accord people the grace of potentially being human beings with complex opinions and well developed reasoning skills and nuanced opinions

[integra1127grimmreaper]

You'll Never Know

Prev

Ike Evans Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Warning: angst, etc.

Summary: You're forced to attend a new year's party with your husband, causing old feelings to flood back when seeing the man that broke your heart four years ago. Inspired by- Mindy McCready's - You'll Never Know.

A/N: Based off; Would you hold it against me universe. Can be read as stand-alone.

I bought a new red dress to lift my spirits up And just like you did, honey, it cost me way too much Next time you see me, I'll bet you'll take a second look You'll wonder why I look so good

You absolutely dreaded having to be at this cursed place, the place that would have been your home had life not fucked you over. What you dreaded the most though, was running into him again after all these years.

Life wasn't fair though, you learnt that the hard way. So, here you were; forced to ring-in the new year at the Miramar Playa, home to the man that broke your heart four years ago.

Why where you here though? It's quite simple; you were accompanying your husband.

You smile at your reflection in the mirror as you think of him.

Ben was a good man, a good husband and father too. You found yourself blessed to have him in your life, in your daughter's life. You had solely believed finding someone that loved you weren't in the cards for you, but then Ben came along.

Marrying Ben Diamond was the best thing, aside from having your daughter, to have happen to you. But at this instance, you might be doubting it a little.

It'll be fine. You reassure yourself while rolling your shoulders backward a few times in attempt to calm down.

The place it packed full. What are the chances of running into him?

With those words in mind, you give yourself a once-over in the mirror and head out the restroom to join the new year's celebration hosted this evening inside the walls of the Miramar.

You'll never know how much I miss you, you won't see it in my face You'll never know I'll never find another that could take your place 'Cause I'll be smiling when I see you, my tears won't ever show Yeah, I might always love you But you'll never know

*

Fate was not on your side this evening it seemed though, because when you exited the restroom, just a few feet away from you, there he stood.

He had his back toward you, but you would recognize that tall broad-shouldered form of his anywhere, anytime.

He hasn't seen you. Move before he does though!

Taking a deep breath, you take a step forward to go to your table, but you're stop instantly in your tracks when he turns around to directly face you then.

Don't acknowledge him. Don't acknowledge him. You internally remind yourself as you stared him dead in the eyes.

When I saw you out last night, you seemed so surprised That I could walk right by and not blink an eye To look at me, you probably think I'm doing fine Good thing you can't read my mind

You stare at Ike as if looking at a stranger, breaking eye contact then to stare pass him as if you're looking for someone. Panic rushes through your veins like ice water when noticing from your peripheral vision, that he was making his way towards you.

Fuck! No! Run!

You were shitting yourself as you thought of a thousand ways in which to escape from the room before he could reach you. Then as if sent by God himself; Ben entered from another direction, calling Ike's attention away from you then.

You let out a sigh of relief at your husband saving you from an extremely awkward situation, panicking just a bit still at the fact that Ben might call you over if he saw you. So, before either of them could realize; you hightailed it back to the rest to wait it out.

* You'll never know how much I miss you, you won't see it in my face You'll never know I'll never find another that could take your place 'Cause I'll be smiling when I see you, my tears won't ever show Yeah, I might always love you But you'll never know...

You sat on the luxurious sofa in the restroom, silently playing with your fingers as you waited it out to go back into party. Hearing the music from Frank Sinatra playing, you knew it was safe to head to your table.

"What took you so long, Sweetheart?" Ben enquires as he pulls out a chair for you.

"There was a long line" you answer, smiling when he presses a kiss to your cheek when seated.

Ben returns the smile, gently brushing your hair aside to press an open-mouthed kiss to your neck then.

"I missed you..."

Your eyes flutter shut at the sensation, turning fully towards him; you press your lips against his.

"I missed you too."

Breaking away from the kiss, Ben beams happily at you and turns back toward watching the show again.

Feeling a lot more at ease, you reach out for your wine glass and direct your attention toward the show as well, but not before your eyes land onto Ike's table that had his wife and children seated at.

He's moved on and so have you. 

Nxt

[sleepy-aletheas]

Penacony Quest 2.2 messy thoughts

I played it all in one go through a migraine, so now it feels like my brain will leak out of my ears. But, some random thoughts I had during playing was:

I fucking knew Sunday was tied to Ena. He wasn't just visually matching to THEM, but also I just kept remembering the whole thing of civilizations rising and falling if they heard THEIR voice, and honestly, the more idealistic and dreamy (heh) the place is, the more one can be sure that it will fall apart. Especially if the place is supposed to follow Harmony.

And since I'm thinking about Sunday already, I knew he was somehow tied with the Stellaron, solely for that deep blue he has in his pupils and on his clothes. It gave me big Cocolia vibes the first time I met him, and I just knew. I feel so good about it.

On that note, Penacony has quite a bit in common with Belobog in general. There is the Overworld/Dreamscape in contrast of the Underworld/Land of Exile, and their differences. One is the face of the planet, where people live normal lives, where they can indulge and live as freely as the space and rules allow. And then we got the separated underbelly of the planet, where it's dim, dreary, wet. It's hard to go there, it's isolated from the outside, and there is something slowly growing to swallow the space whole (be it the fragmentum or memoria). These similarities definitely made it more enjoyable for me, both in a "oh I know how this goes" and in a "where is the catch?" type of way my brain often goes, and it just made it so much more fun.

Also, knowing that Aventurine left secret letters that Robin found and then followed to uncover the truth of Penacony makes my brain reel. When and where did he put those? What did he already know? How? I need to pick his brain apart, please Hoyo.

Also, Aven being rescued by Argenti who called him "dashing" and likening him to a peacock made me kick my feet. More characters should praise Aven, just saying. But him apparently being in a woeful state made me question where he came through and what happened between his last goodbye to Kakavasha and him being out of the dream.

Also, Aven saying the word "friend" when we talk to him for a moment in a kind, non-sarcastic or double-meaning way made me so excited.

Also, I need more babysitter Dan Heng and I-wanna-swear-but-can't Boothill to cause shenanigans a bit more. Add the Trailblazer and we got a riot (maybe even a literal one, poor Dan Heng, he can take it). I just really liked their personalities bouncing off each other, it was nice that Dan Heng was more outspoken and his voice was warmer than when he was on the Luofu. It's a more subtle character development that might mean nothing, but I still think it's neat.

The boss fight was pretty good. I miraculously didn't die once, neither did any of my characters go down (Asta clung to her 60 hp with sheer will alone). Thanks Aven, I knew I can depend on you.

Also the chicken wing siblings are just great characters in general. Robin is so soft and delicate and absolutely resolute to stand by her principles, it was delightful to have her on screen. Her determination is just great, I wanted to stay with her some more. And Sunday made me so frustrated with his monologues and philosophy, I absolutely love him. Seeing the differences between my own principles and his, getting to know why he thinks this made it so satisfying. I need more characters like that.Tho, I still wanna take him by his wings and slam him face first into a wall, but in a affectionate way (questionable, but okay). And their dynamic was also really fucking cool, cause they love each other, but they won't sacrifice their own ideals, and even go against the other. Not out of pride or hate, but simply because they are two different people that have their own opinions.

The whole quest was delightful, but it's hard to focus my thoughts into something coherent and I will have to make my migraine go away to actually process what I played through.

[byanyan]

@gnarledbite sent:ㅤHe hands them a simple box wrapped in red paper. Inside is a new sharpening block, and a new butterfly knife. The handles are solid black, but the blade is a different story. It's iridescent, with markings carefully etched into the metal resembling some of the simpler tattoos adorning the teen's hands. “Tempering it so the metal turned those colors took… three tries? It's not paint or coating, so it won't chip or flake off.”

ㅤthey're already confused the moment the box is in their hands. it's christmastime, sure, but a gift? for them? from garrett, whom they've been little more than a nuisance for? the unexpectedness of it is plain as day in their features, caught too off guard to even attempt to conceal it as they stare down at the present. dark eyes flit momentarily up to the other kindred's face, as though to make certain that there isn't some mistake here, then return to the bright red paper.

with an air of caution, almost like they're sure this is some sort of trick and they're waiting for the twist, long fingers begin peeling the wrapping paper back to reveal the box beneath. it seems normal enough once they've pulled it free, so byan progresses to the next step and lifts the lid off too, only to draw to a pause at the sight of what lay inside.

it's... amazing. the blade of the knife alone is gorgeous, the colours shifting in the light as they turn the box slightly, but it's the markings that have been engraved into it that really catch their attention. images they'd recognize anywhere, ones they can see mirrored this very moment across their fingers and the backs of their hands, carved into the metal of a knife. for them. struck dumb as they are by the surprise, they almost miss garrett's words. part of them wishes that they did, because the realization that comes with them tugs their wide-eyed stare up to his face, alarmed

ㅤㅤ" you— "ㅤthey start, but their voice catches before they can get much more out. clearing their throat, their gaze quickly drops back to their hands as they take a moment to let things sink in a little more.ㅤ" ...you made this? "

having some of their tattoos engraved in the blade is already a lot, especially with how accurate they are. the ones chosen might be some of the simpler ones, but even that would have required to notice them, to pay attention to what are ultimately quite small details, in order to replicate them. him purchasing a knife and having those designs etched into it is already a large amount of thought and effort to put into a gift, but if he's actually made the entire thing himself? and it took three tries to get it right? that's just... that's too much. it's too much to waste on them, so much more than they're worth when all they've done is invade his home, steal his things, and cause him trouble.

ㅤㅤ" what the fuck. "ㅤfeeling that familiar tightness tucked just beneath their chin, that sensation which always foreshadows tears, the distinct urge to flee flares up. for a long moment, they consider acting on it, their fingers twitching as they come so close to shoving the box back into garrett's hands and turning to run off. for a long moment, they simply stand there in a silence that practically vibrates with their intense, conflicting emotions.

ㅤㅤ" this is so... —you shouldn't've... "ㅤtwo sentiments begin and die on their tongue, and byan pauses again to swallow thickly. they can feel it, that threatening sting in the corners of their eyes, and they know that if they let those tears fall, they'll be thick and red and even more mortifying than crying in front of someone has ever been before. it can't happen. they're already embarrassing themself enough as it is. clearing their throat again and giving a quick sniff, they draw a steady, if unnecessary, breath in and stand up taller as though to play off their entire reaction thus far.

ㅤㅤ" i, uh. i didn't know you could do that. that's really cool though, an' this— "ㅤa gesture to the knife and sharpening block, neither of which they have yet managed to pluck from the box,ㅤ" ...this is... i mean, i dunno what t' say, this is dope as hell. "

[whatspastisprologue-blr]

Hellooooooo 😊. For the ruin album ask game, 12 and 15?

12 and 15, got it! Be warned, I wrote this on my phone at about 1:30 in the morning. My already tenuous control over my long-windedness is virtually gone. This isn't quite stream-of-consciousness but it's close.

12.

Which song do I always sing to? I mean, all of them? Lol! I really love the vibes for The Calling (gender, identity, past self versus who you're becoming now, "I really fucking tried" and "I watched that woman drown" and the whole chorus), The Old Witch Sleep and the Good Man Grace is one of those wild songs that makes you feel powerful while regretting your lack of an archenemy to have ~tension~ with, and Ruin itself is just... It's just a really good depiction of repairing a relationship.

The answer is certainly not Chords, but only because I can't get through it without crying. It's a beautiful song but it hits me in a really vulnerable place and I just can't go there often (like Marbles, actually, though Marbles is worse).

Blossoms hits home a lot ("as I make myself acquainted with the saint of never getting it right"), and as an introvert with social anxiety (well, anxiety in general, including social situations), I relate a lot to Drinking Song for the Socially Anxious. I also enjoy D&D and I might dress my cat up as Batman for Halloween.

But I think, ultimately, it might be down to Secret Worlds and Inkpot Gods.

I really love the excited energy of Secret Worlds, "come on!", this sense of wonder, "do I have to be who I am", "cause I will suffer silence for the strings you tune and I will stand what's written for the writer in you/write me well, my love, write me weird, write me willing, write me well". I get a laugh out of Joey's tone of voice at "well, we thought you were mental/you were talking to trees".

And, oh, Inkpot Gods. Just, Joey's whole verse, really, and Madeleines. Really gives me hope and comfort. These aren't tears, it's just your voice learning for once to stand up tall. Making a vow to the dark for someone's life. And then Madeleine shows up with, "what you hear is not silence, it's just the trees waiting to hear what makes you howl", which is such a raw and wild line followed by a moment of actual silence to emphasize the point. Picking up with "what you see is not the dark, it's just the gods upturning inkpots cause they know what you'll become". Just, unending the plans of the gods as they realize you've gone outside their plan, no big deal. And then she doesn't bother to make a vow to some other entity, no, she outright threatens the gods to keep this man safe or else she'll make them pay. I really resonate both with "I will be the man my father never was" and "Cause I'm more than what my mum taught me to be". And, of course, "If I don't make it back from where I've gone, just know I loved you all along."

So, all of that to say, it's probably Inkpot Gods. Especially since it's the last song on the album, it feels like TAD is assuring us as we go on our way that we'll be just fine.

15.

What song would I recommend? Well, I've recently told my mom about Chords, though I didn't technically recommend it because I knew she wouldn't like the swearing. I did tell her about the chorus and "they might laugh because you're leaving but know we'll sing your name when you come home".

The song I've recommended most, actually, is Drinking Song, because I love how it depicts that anxiety so well and how there's no shame or embarrassment over not being an extrovert. I enjoy the bonding moment when you realize someone else at this gathering is also a nerd and it's just such a relief because, whew, I'm not alone anymore. There's someone else standing awkwardly in a corner not knowing what to say to anyone, feeling like a total outsider, wondering when they can finally duck out and missing their cat/questioning why they thought going to hang out with humans was a good idea when they could've been relaxed at home with their cat this whole time. Finding someone you can be an introvert with, someone you can just exist alongside, both of you maybe doing separate things but in the same room and that honestly feels really nice, just existing quietly around someone else without necessarily interacting with them and having that be okay between you.

[aluckiicoin]

The thief stares with contempt. He really shouldn't. After all, the pot is calling the kettle black. That's why it aggravated the man. Because they were the same. Though be it by age or experience, Sampo has a better handle of his feelings. Aventurine... Was still green. A child one could say. It showed with how his arms came up in a defensive position.

Koski sighs, his arms unfold. He can't get angry at him. Not when he's being sincere now. "I simply wanted to know. Now that I do... I suppose we'll have to find a way to work." Whatever that work may mean to them. Fuck buddies, friends with benefits. Lovers. "That's the joy of existence." Sampo mused aloud. "Finding out what it all means." Even if it leads to ruination.

Ah, now that's an expression he knew too well. Should've known it would come down to that. It was the way most people looked at him after all – with exception of those who saw him as a pretty thing to ruin to their desire. The thief didn't seem like the later if he was Aventurine might had been able to avoid this for a while longer. He hadn't even told him what else he got up to – for business or in his free time.

If something as harmless as his inability to emote like other people caused this reaction already, he really didn't wanna know what he'd get to see if he had actually 'opened up'. But wasn't it better this way ?

His eyes wandered off, unwilling to subject himself to that expression any longer. The blonde got what he asked for; didn't he? He had reached out tentatively, tried to connect, once he got the expression that he could somehow get himself to feel alive while dealing with the conman. In a sense? The weird ache was a sign that he was alive. It's not the result he aimed for sure. But it was what he got for still not having learned his lesson.

He thought he did. This experiment on being a person had failed on a spectacular level. Well, better now than later. He was alone before, he could do so again. He'd rather not imagine how he would react when he had kept up his efforts – had been successful in them even.

Ah, he'd probably be in shambles.

He could deal with the crack in the confident mask he was showing now.

The thief's sigh caused him to move his eyes back onto the other – a mistake, really. Because somehow, for some reason, he flinched at Sampo's movement. Funny, how fast one could go from being fine with a person keeping lethal weapons on themselves around you to looking like being lashed out at was a likely occurrence. Aventurine only really listened to half of the words spoken.

No - no that wouldn't do. He wasn't sure how he had deluded himself into believing the other had enjoyed being around him in the first place. But even it there was anything there before - clearly that's not the case now. And Aventurine did not want the other to stick around a person he couldn't stand. Especially if that person was himself. If honesty got him into this terrible situation but omitting the truth and hiding himself had worked fine before, maybe he could salvage the whole scenario with outright lying. Without the cursed tagline he was under no obligation to be honest again. The mask slid back in place, but both his smile and his words fall flat.

“Oh, I do have a proposition then.”, he started focusing a spot right over Sampo's shoulder to fake eye contact. “Anyone paying you to spill my secrets, or what we've been up to? I'll pay you double. Just, send me a message and it's done.”, his eyes close, he was quite certain that if he kept them open he'd start leaking – and that was something he still refused to do – even though he wanted to, quite desperately. Nothing would happen either way. It would come to haunt him days later and he'd probably be awake for at least one night and sick to his bones yet again.

“No need to deal with me directly any more. No other obligations.” The joy of existence? Now that was a really cruel joke. There was valid reason to doubt existence had genuine joy in store for him. He would just have to keep taking those little dances with death or the risky deals to summon a pallid imitation of it. “Otherwise I'll just hurt you too.”, followed finally, barely audible. Nothing wrong with being honest about that part – it could as well be read as threat, though it lacked all signs of being one.

[gooddadbetterhusband]

Good Evening,

If you read the bio you saw that I am a father and Husband, my job causes my family to move every couple of years. I have an beautiful wife who I love with all my heart and 7 amazing kids who I would die for. And so far this year it seems I have had to push myself to close to that. For starters I'm writing this blog from my son's Hospital room where he has been for the past week, nothing life threatening but never the less the strain it puts on a family.

Currently my family and I are in Ohio, the state where I was raised I left here in 2016 and swore I would never live here again. I can't stand this state there is to many horrible fucked up memories here. However we moved here a long last year, my wife and I welcomed our youngest child here and I made some pretty decent friends in our year living here. One of those friends We can call him Bill, dude is a life saver always gave sound advice always there when I needed him. Problem is I wasn't, my life is so hectic and I put such a tremendous amount of pressure on myself to be what everyone in my family needed that I forgot to give absolutely any effort to my friendships and let me tell you gentlemen that you need your boys. Your head does some fucked up shit if you don't have your boys. I quit making time for him or hell anyone. So there I was 2 weeks ago and I had just found of one of the guys who I used to work with when I was younger died and I had no one to call. On top of that my wife has been sick, still don't know what exactly is going on but it completely knocks her on her ass. I don't mean like just kinda sick I mean like we've been to doctors and specialists and we are still searching for a diagnosis. And now my son is sick, which he will recover but we don't know how long.

I guess what I'm trying to say is I know I have always been an asshole, as my wife puts it Im the nicest asshole she knows, but because I put myself last now I'm an alone asshole. Some women might read this and be like this guy is an idiot he has is family, yes I do, and yes I am so thankful for them. But as a man when you sacrifice every relationship for your family, when things get dark there is no one there to pull you up.

-GDBH