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okay like. i haven’t read a lot. crippling undiagnosed adhd and probably memory issues have kept me from consuming books since like elementary school. i probably finished one assigned novel in high school and i finally finished a whole novel for fun last year. i’m churning through moby dick slowly atm, but as a decent editor and writer and hence someone associated with the writing community and seeing those booktok recs or whatever…
girl tell me why the first book i open. starts with a fucking. spotify playlist. like, i was Aware that these books were wattpad-level. but i didnt think it was THAT wattpad holy shit
#and i dont tend to judge music taste either#but let’s just say im looking at half of these artists on this playlist. and i can already Tell#also for context since i know people can bitch#it’s not that i DIDNT read during that time#i tried so fuckin hard to read. it’s just i would power thru a chunk. then have to put it down. and then by the time id be able to pick it#up again. i’d have forgotten everything and would have to start over again. eg i restarted the chopin bibliography i have like 3 times#i read quite a few short stories tho#the one book in high school was the wars btw. fuck i cant remember the author. timothy smth. but it was very good#anyways. just had to rant bc i wanna see Just How Bad It Is since i technically Am kinda working in a writing-community-adjacent thing#and need to see for myself. how bad this is. i just cant get past the spotify playlist im gonna cry#a while back i tried kinda reading bits of love hypothesis and god. GOD. HFNGNGNNGG#so i already have a suspicion for what im in for#but i need to see MORE of the bad smut people are calling prose or whatever#mandont
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a friend who'd wait :)
#im posting this very late because i was sort of weary of how it came out and ended up messing w it until it was like 4am oops.#and i have plans tmrw so... oh well! i did my best and ill put it out while i can!#and i tried to make the scene match barnard's colors lol#finn's ocs#finn's art#i know i said id do more sillay stuff with the simpler screentone only style but i had a couple more of these in me#and this is the first piece im making thats like an actual part of the story too rather than just setting stuff for fun#i wanna write something to go with it too but for now ill just sort of briefly explain the context in the tags here:#barnard has a pretty bad case of OCD and his compulsions have made it difficult to make friends in the past#he was never outright bullied or anything but people just didnt really have the patience to deal with it#he has compulsions that include stuff like walking through doors until it feels right and needing things to be perfectly aligned#which in group settings has lead to people having to wait for him to finish his rituals and join them#they might find it tolerable at first but eventually they grow impatient and hes just... not invited to stuff anymore#but juno is a newer member of the guild who ends up frequenting the same library. hes also kinda a little weird#and they dont become fast friends or anything but just sort of naturally spend time in the same place#though they never plan meetups they eventually fall into a routine. around the same time theyd just both be at the library#and read next to each other. and maybe talk a bit. and eventually they end up walking back to the guildhall together#since theyre going to the same place after all. and juno always waits for barnard outside the door#eventually barnard asks if this bothers him. juno kinda just tells him 'of course it does' without any malice or anything. just a statement#barnard is surprised and apologizes and juno says not to. but the next day juno doesnt show up at the usual time.#barnard assumes hes committed somekinda more by bringing it up. he ends up staying there late reading to get his mind off it & not ruminate#but when he leaves juno is in fact still waiting for him down the hall (see pic) having collected a bunch of books literally abt ocd#he fell asleep bc barnard stayed later than expected. and hes an eepy guy generally. and also one very bad at expressing himself#but now barnard gets that juno's 'of course it [bothers me]' had the implication of 'but its worth it' which no friend has previously done.#and from the interaction juno was also able to understand that this isn't something barnard just does for the hell of it so. he studies.#and checks a bunch of stuff out because he thinks it could help his friend too (theres ocd workbooks and such- i remember working w them)#and thats the point where they became more ''friends'' than ''pleasant library acquaintances''#from there on they also do get into juno's problems. whole other bag of worms. but this specific scene is more about bernard from his pov#sorry about when i said briefly explain. i lied </3#but compared to the whole sequence im picturing its brief so shhh
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listening to starchild from ghost quartet and thinking about Rodion bc she's such an emotionally loaded character and i think abt her a lot
there's such a specific flavor of burnout gifted kid syndrome that she like. both does and doesn't have (chat me fr)
especially surrounding her general view of herself and how she handles things
she wants to change things and she's tried and yet it's all been pointless and she feels helpless and she's holding it together w/ a facade that's gonna slip
part of me wonders if she's gonna 'join' the other side for awhile/'betray' the sinners solely to do a lil' backstabbing, in similar fashion to like. raskolnikov
but who knows lmfao
#rodion lcb#limbus company#lcb#projmoon#project moon#devi_thoughts#cw: existential dread/cognito hazard#don't read further into the tags if you don't wanna think abt this stuff pls this is like partially my own dread#I just think starchild ties into all this bc it specifically focuses on being abandoned by a god you barely know + general mediocrity#and it's just something that like. outside of the painful need to do something special so you're seen and so you can change things#there's the underlying dread of just. being lost to the seas of time#and rodion 100% encompasses that feeling that I like. also personally struggle with so heavily#she's a character pretty much slept on bc her initial canto did NOTHING to pull from the book/the themes of the book#but I hope she receives the nuance she desperately needs and deserves#bc despite being different and separate from Sonya#she still clearly has a connection#and I wanna see how that versus her relationship with Dante + the sinners impacts things
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🧸♡ ⋆。˚
#it actually does make such a huge difference omg im like ... feels like i got thrown into the floor lost my breath#having someone i like so much to talk to abt things#and share stuff and details abt not only my days but their days too#and talking abt like books that we read or shows/movies we saw and etc etc#sending pics. sending voice messages. all of that#that was so amazing wth???#it sounds like such a mundane thing but it changed my enire baseline. it wasnt a littel thing to me#i didnt share as much as i wanted to because it takes me longer to settle into smth like this#or any kind of connection/correspondence/bond/rapport#im slow bc im so scared of ppl. scared of trusting. scared of opening up. rejection rejection all of that#yeah.. takes me a lot longer than the average person to settle into smth like this#avpd is its own special hell...#i miss it a lot and i wish there hadnt been all the other circumstances so i could've actually relaxed into it#and come out of my shell completely. which i was almost there. now that mental block is gone but it's too late....#i take too long... it is impossible to be patient with me. i really hate everything abt my brain#my desire overtook my fear and it was quicker than it ever has but not enough.. :(#i miss it sm and it made me feel so so much lust for life..#but it's gone now and i can really feel the loss of it#i wouldve done anything i could to save it. or nurture it. or whatever. but it was a sacred treasure to /me/.#it doesnt matter if i try to put out the flames in a burning house if the house is gone and there are actually only the flames left#and since to me it is so special. and like. the fact that this even happened is crazy to me stuff like this feelings and connection never#happen to me. it's like.. special to talk to someone u like & have an established rapport with on a regular basis#and tell them stuff and rant abt like a book or whatever. ask them details abt their life bc u know them and enjoy knowing them#i cant just transfer all of this to someone else. i dont feel like yapping abt the book im reading into the void or someone i barely know#i just dont know... i need that sm and it was so amazing w someone i like sm. & it makes me sad i takes me too long to get fully comfortable#bc of this time were it was the most intense and long lasting for me but also im in love lmao. but other times too...#i take too long and why would someone wanna wait like actually a year (which is how long it often takes me to pass a certain barrier)#im not special. im nothing that great. it is easy to find someone else who is x1000 better than me and wont take an eternity to warm up#i just feel so sad bc i try so hard and then all of my effort just goes down the drain and then i have to do it again if i meet someone#then they'll leave me behind too and get tired of me and not like what they see and then im back at square 1 again
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WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME BURROWS END WASNT FREE
#I DIDNT TALK TO ANYONE ABOUT IT BUT STILL. SOMEONE SHOULDVE WARNED ME BEFORE I GOT COMPLETELY INVESTED#I know next to nothing abt dimension 20 I’m pretty sure I just saw a post abt burrows end specifically MONTHS ago and was like 👀👀👀#opened a tab with the first episode to watch later and promptly forgot about it#until last night! having a bad night and was like hrm what if I just watch smth#and I’ve been reading watership down recently!! finally got my own copy bc it was my favourite book when I was like NINE#so I am fully primed to fall in love with a story abt little animals rn and man#I am OBSESSED with this and also realising yeah I’m at a point where I could get very into tabletop rpgs now#what if. what if I just get dropout. what if I just do that. would that not be fun. I would like to see the stoats do stuff#i am so in love with Ava and her player and I understand so much more about brennan lee mulligan now. and VIOLA#viola may be my favourite character I’m obsessed with how she interacts with other characters.m#i NEED to know what’s up with thorn’s cult thing. and also thorn. what is going on there#hrrgrhehh the thing that’s holding me back is I’m allergic to subscriptions#impermanence. even though I know it’s fairly unlikely I’ll wanna watch it again any time soon I don’t like the idea that I’d have to like#in a couple years pay for it again or not be able to bc I can’t afford it even though I already paid for it once#I’m a books + cartridge games guy and it shows.#okay. I will chew on this. the price is not unreasonable and I have coincidentally also been looking at make some noise clips#it does not help that I basically never watch things but my favourite podcast is also ending within the next month (2 episodes left)#and this IS primarily audio so I could cook + watch mayhaps. and I’ve heard good things abt all other d20.#they have a 20% off first year deal on. annual would make me less stressed long term if I end up liking this bc cheaper + choice premade#and would also mean I can do it now and not feel bad abt wasting the first month bc I won’t be able to watch much for a few weeks#fuck it I’m allowed to make frivolous purchases sometimes I will simply swallow the subscription distaste#more stoats >:)#that aside all the players are incredible I’m pretty sure when this is done I’ll wanna watch other seasons just to see what else they do#okay go do the thing I believe in you you can spend money sometimes#luke.txt#update I downloaded the app. I am putting off the decision for another day now bc it’s 1:21am and I have not been thinking clearly <3
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im considering making percy jackson the next class novel in my class but like, do i think the kids will actually enjoy it and that they're definitely the right age for it OR am i just wanting to do it because i want to read it???
#like they're a bunch of 9/10yos so im worried they're still a year or two off it being a better time to read it#maybe i need to reread it bc i haven't read it since i was 12 and decide then if they'd enjoy it?#or maybe i test the waters with deltora quest first bc that feels a lil younger and is also fantasy#but again i want to read deltora quest thus my consideration of it like will they even like it?#like obvs you gotta be a tiny bit selfish with class novels bc like. i do have to read it and be able to essentially perform it to the kids#but stilllllllll. they're a tough crowd my class and i wanna pick something good#i should investigate some other options perhaps#its just hard bc most of my class are fully in their diary of a wimpy kid bad guys weirdo era#and they're SO unwilling already to read outside of their preferred series so they're not very adventurous with the literary world#i guess i'll see if i can find some comedy options that are still chapter books.... that could be an in#damn this is the longest rant ever about something that matters so little. soz guys.#i am accepting class novel recommendations appropriate for grade 4s tho#for context we just did matilda to mixed reviews and they somewhat enjoyed paul jennings#my post tag
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🍪🥛
#out of sight out of mind....#im not gonna check his blogs every day from here on out#and i hid/archived our chat so i dont have to see it when i open the messaging app#i do have some kind of 'fomo' lol bc i dont wanna miss out on any potential glimpse into his mind or days#esp now when he doesnt tell me anything anymore. idk anything abt what goes on with him#but .. i am allowing and letting him control my life#i obsessively check my phone and refresh his blogs ALL day#it's extremely unhealthy and pathetic and i know this#it's just hard to stop bc i genuinely... love him sm#plus he told me he wanted me for real so he made me not only dream of a life i thought wasnt possible for me#but also WANT it. i only want him and to live with him and be his. that's all i want but he just cut me off out of nowhere lol#and im still hung up on it... i dont want my boring reality. current nor future. i just want the reality where im with him which he made me#think was smth i could have one day soon.#but anyway. if his feelings changed that's how it is. it's not even his fault it's just how things work in life#even if i dont want to accept it i have to. i cant keep living in this limbo. i try to talk to him but he's a wall so that's a No.#so i cant let him control my life and waste away all my days on him#i need to stop checking his blogs and our chat. that's the first step#im still gonna allow myself to think of him and daydream and fantasize. but that will have to stop soon too#then i have to focus on doing my assignments and read books and go to the gym#things that will help me get realistically where i want in my current reality#i want to finish highschool and then apply for a preschool or library program#and hopefully the plan is to get a student housing apartment so i can move out finally and live on my own and study#then when i finish i'll look for a job as either of those things. and a place to live (which is super fkn hard in these modern chaos times)#even if i have to live my life all alone... i want to be as comfortable as i can at least#i can live in my own row house and have pets and work and read and play games and watch shows#and see and talk to my mom#i mean hopefullyyyy i'll be able to try to make at least some shallow connections so i have ppl to hang out with#i can always hope to meet someone who'll fall in love with me but im not counting on it#ugh.. bc as it is now#i dont do ANYTHING but be on my phone
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yeah you need hobbies outside of media consumption or you’ll go insane. however if i spent an entire day reading books i would not go insane i would feel happy and fulfilled <3
#reading is my favourite hobby by far#to the point where i originally got into tma through reading the transcripts. if i’m having a Day with regards to focusing on audio#i can always read it. if i can’t i’m severely ill or utterly exhausted#reading just doesn’t feel like i’m consuming media. it feels like reading i don’t know how else to put it#sure there are books that give me brainrot and i would consider participating in their fandom to be a part of Consuming Media#but that probably accounts for maybe 5% of the books i read to be perfectly honest#i think rather than hobbies that aren’t Consuming Media people need hobbies that are offline#like sure they can be electronic i read ebooks all the time and i want to get back into html and css bc i liked it at school#but they aren’t socialmediaified. like when i post about my baking or my telescope it’s a) rare b) bc i wanna tell my mutuals what i’m up t#and i think making a hobby your entire online brand and doing it for money/clout is always going to change the way you enjoy it#also. tumblr is a weird case bc it’s the consuming media website it’s the fandom website. and you don’t see the people behind the blogs irl#so you don’t know what else they’re up to!! you just see them blorboposting!!#even the most deranged person here has interiority and likes doing other things#yes even the 24 year old children’s cartoon discourse bloggers. always remember that <3#morganposting
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i love esteban so much :(
#I know u guys all know but literally my FEELINGS I NEVER HAVE THIS MANY FEELINGS#Even when normally writing fic I'm like haha won't this be great#BUT NOW I'M LIKE FEELINGS FEELINGS FEELINGS#I'm not allowed to write til I finish this novel tho which is a really good novel bc I believe i have to recharge even if i am itching...#Also hi new followers I'm tetrapod7 i am a recently converted este fan in the last three months :)#And I LOVE him#And I write a lot of fic :)#This website is driving me up the wall... So much stuff#I need to read this book but I also just wanna see if I can get the pics without watermarks...#Also i guess drop in anytime! I'm friendly but shy I guess but also picky
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reading this blurb made me realise this is possibly the first time ive ever seen my own life experiences shared by another person. damn
#liiike who else up having childhood meningitis leading to moderate-severe deafness thats disabling but also 'not disabling enough'#exasperated by problems with new digital hearing aids GIRL ME TOOOOO we need to get coffee sometime#im reallyyy curious about this book now i wanna give it a go.. ive been meaning to read more abt deafness tbh#its never really bothered me before bc ive never really thought abt it that much. but actually theres very little lit on deafness#and also barely any fiction featuring deaf characters.... plus when it does exist theyre either a) old asf or b) fluent in sign#when actually like. if youre not raised with sign/dont have access to a signing community its very rare to learn it at all#ive met so many ppl irl across the deaf spectrum who cant sign like its WAY more prevalent than youd think#not that signing rep isnt cool!! but i guess no one wants to write deaf characters who cant sign bc then its not 'fun'#bit of a shame that ive never actually seen that massive part of my life + identity reflected in media like. ever lmao.#i mean ive seen more dyke rep than deaf rep.. which is weird thinking abt it bc deafness impacts my life so much more radically#anyway. might see if i can find a copy on abebooks 👀#Hearing Happiness: Deafness Cures in History by Jaipreet Virdi is the book if anyones curious i just saw it on someones reading reclist#.diaries
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oh my god has anyone read little mushroom?? i’m halfway through the book i am DEVESTATED i feel like something bads gonna happen but i care so much for an zhe 😭
#also like… i was so skeptical of lu feng at first but god the more i read his character the more i get torn thinking abt his position#in their messed up world#idk the entire concept of the arbiter is so fucked up but also i can see how it’s necessary in the conditions of their world??#the author is building this world so intricately so even though all the death is so hard to stomach you can’t even.. argue with it?#and the way the small romance is blossoming between a sentient little mushroom and the icy cold judge gawwwwdddddddd#it just has me feeling so so strange#like. idk . makes me wanna cry ………#i need someone to make an in depth essay about this book because it’s so conflicting and hard to stomach but also i love it sm 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#an zhe in the midst of that cruel world just feels so gentle and soft and unlike the misery existing in that world i think that’s what drew#lu feng to him 😭
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U know how sometimes you feel a bit (and that bit can vary wildly) sad about how many flaws you have (which is normal and human) and how much growing you can do (which is a good goal but perhaps self destructive once you're putting off A Certain Amount of life until you've done "more work" with that goal post of "more work" always moving farther even though at a certain point you should probably accept that every person is somewhat flawed and always needs to grow more and it's okay to Actively Live one's life and enjoy it DURING that endless process of growing)
Well I certainly feel that way again. I feel like all I should do in my free time for the next 3 months (rather than play or create or self care) is do workbooks for healing and growing. And that I shouldn't bother with my life goals again until I've completed the workbooks At Minimum. (And my instincts are saying ummm that plan sounds like a touch workaholic and avoiding actually living life and isolating)
#rant#i just. i decided i want a loving relationship. its been many years. id like to date again#so i. as usual when i have a problem. looked up HOW#well i read 1 book about physical and thought process changes i can make. and it suggested date within 3 weeks. among other tjings#and so i looked up INTERNAL work to find love. because perhaps if i can fix whatever INTERNALLY draws me to only run into unavailable people#will allow me to start running into AVAILABLE options instead. so i need to complete this 300 page therapy workbook.#and theres no point doing the date within 3 weeks if im only able to ask out unavailable people currently.#so ill do the date in 3 weeks AFTER i complete the workbook.#the workbook is exhaustjng and makes me cry but hey maybe itll help. anyway i wish someone had given it to me 5 years ago#but anyway to hqve time to do with workbook ASAP i dont have time for shows#and i rarely have time for Play anyway. something i hear i need.#because i got chronic illnesss wooh and a lot of my free time i need to go to doctors and physical therapy#and manage my diet (cause i have gastroparesis so if im not careful i Cant eat)#and also i need more muscle so my back stops fucking up.#and also i need time to meditate so my pelvic floor relaxes at least a little to lower the gi issues and pain.#so like.#and then also im sure friends would like to see me more.#meanwhile all i really wanna do? is go to a#cabin by the beach in rhe woods and sleep 2 days then eat cake then read and write my fucking novels
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update on the fic im reading: the second book is being dragged out Sooo much.
#glad ppl have been having gay sex left and right for the last 10 chapters i guess. but maybe we need to stop and be more plot-heavy now#if it didnt involve truly nice character study i wouldve dropped it already#i really wanted to finish this before vacations but Yeah it was never gonna happen it took me way too long to get past these 10 chapters bc#basically the same things happen over and over again. doesnt help that all the chapters are very long either#i feel like probably reading it waiting for the weekly update can also be kinda fun. u get a whole chapter of interactions and some#character introspection and some smut but frankly reading it all back to back is just tiring. please do something else. please put your#lives in danger to permanently change the trajectory of your relationship or wtv#i do wanna see where this ends tho. like in the third book. so yeah i'll push thru it until the end
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So, this week I ordered a new couch pillow because I had a husband pillow full of shredded memory foam, and the thing needs to be opened and shifted around about once a week with the way I use it so it doesn't shape up weird and actually fuck up my back when I bought it to NOT fuck up my back.
I now have a wedge pillow, made of one piece of foam. And I ordered a book cushion from etsy, and I just wanna say to anyone who has thought "that adaptive thing seems like it would be useful, but I'm not disabled, so maybe it's not for me?"
It's for you. Trust me. My back hurt because I was slouching weird on the couch. I got a husband pillow. It helped a lot. But, it turns out, what I need is one giant piece of memory foam, not a bunch of tiny bits.
And the book cushion? Books are heavy sometimes. Being able to rest it higher in my lap so it's easier to read and hold? Better for my body.
Also, do you wake up with pain in the mornings? Try a contour pillow and a knee pillow.
Get those extra-strong treaded soles to wear with your heels because you wobble otherwise.
Wear compression gloves when you type. Get those orthopedic shoes because you can walk longer distances in more comfort. Buy the bra that actually supports the weight of your boobs. Get a lapdesk for your computer. Use a neck pillow even at home to keep your neck straight. Wear socks to bed. Listen to audiobooks. Read large print books.
You see something that you think will work for you and improve how you feel? Use it! Let's fucking normalize adaptative shit for everyone!
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If Civil War didn't end in divorce and everyone lived together Part 2
Read Part 1 and Part 3
Tony: Why is Underoos mopping the ceiling?
Sam: Told him since he's sticky that's his chore
Bucky: It's only fair he helps out around the house
Tony: Hm. Makes sense
-
Vision cooked dinner:
Peter: *pushing around food to make it look eaten*
Natasha: *surreptitiously spitting into napkin*
Steve: *taking small bites with tons of water*
Bucky: *just stares at full plate*
Tony: Well this is disgusting, I'm ordering pizza
-
Sam: C'mon man stop moping around, you gotta get yourself a girl
Bucky: Ok.
Sam: Ok? Okayyyyy! I know-
Bucky: Give me your phone
Sam: Oh you got a number in mind already hotshot? *hands phone over*
Bucky: *ring* Hi Sarah ;)
Sam: BOY-
-
Peter: Ned thought you would seperate your colours from your lights but he also thought you'd be homophobic so I don't pay him much mind cuz clearly I'm more of a superhero expert than him but he does have a 2% better average than me in history so like maybe you do hand wash your clothes and that's why I asked what underwear you wear because-
Steve: *listening intently with apprehension and alarm*
Natasha: I can't believe you found the one person on Earth who talks more nonsense than you
Tony: I know right, it's incredibly unnerving. I'm planning on adopting him
-
Peter: Mr. Stark I have to tell you something. I think Vision is a... *whispers* pervert
Tony: Um, why?
Peter: He keeps floating through my room without knocking! He saw me changing, he saw my nipples !
Tony: Well if anyone's a predator here it would be you. I mean showing your nipples to a 2 year old? Deplorable.
Peter:
Peter: Oh god, I'm the pervert...
-
Bucky: Y'know animosity isn't good between teammates. I think we should spend more time together
Sam: Am I being punked right now? Where's the camera
Bucky: I'm serious. I think it would be healthy for us to bond
Sam: Okay fine I'll bite... what did you have in mind
Bucky: Wanna go for a run?
Sam: *slams door in Bucky's face*
-
*staring at Bucky's sparkly clean metal arm*
Bucky: Dishwasher?
Peter: Dishwasher :)
(later that day)
Bucky: I've decided to let the child live
Peter: YoU wHaT?!
-
Thwip
Tony: Who took my coffee cup, It was right here
Thwip
Bruce: Um, has someone seen my book? I just had it
Thwip
Steve: I could've sworn I was holding a pen a moment ago
*giggling from the ceiling*
Tony: Young man I will take those webshooters away if you use them for shenanigans and rascality
Peter, muffled: Mr. Hawkeye told me to!
Clint: Oh so you're just gonna rat me out like that?
Peter: Sor- OOF
*falls out of ceiling vent*
-
Sam: You're in my spot
Bucky: There are no spots, it's a common area
Sam: Well that's my spot
Bucky: Did you buy the chair??
Sam: No, but everyone knows that's where I sit. Right Steve?
Steve: Oops I forgot something in my car, be right back *leaves*
Sam: Still my spot
Bucky: Still not
Sam: *sits on him*
Bucky: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU ALL THE COUCHES ARE FREE-
Sam: IT'S MY SPOT YOU CAN'T TAKE A MAN'S FAVOURITE CHAIR-
BUCKY: YOU HAVE ISSUES GET OFF ME-
(one hour later)
Steve: Hey so turns out I don't have a car! Isn't that funn...
Sam & Bucky: *Squeezed awkwardly on the chair together*
Steve: I think I left something in my car
-
Steve: Leave the bedroom door open when you have Vision in there
Wanda: UGH you're so protective
Tony: Teenagers, am I right? Caught Pete reassembling my particle accelerator at midnight because he needed to neutralize a miniature nuclear bomb he nabbed off some guy he neglected to tell me was trying to kill him
Steve:
Steve: Wanda y'know what do whatever you want
Wanda: Really?
Steve: Yes just keep being normal. At least I can read about our issues in a parenting book
-
Thor: Ah, new warriors I see! Good to make all your acquaintance. But why are you so grumpy my friend?
Bucky: *glaring*
Peter: He's always like that. It's um, P- P- PMS? Wait -
Natasha: Yes it's PMS
Wanda: He's got it bad
Steve: *genuinely concerned* Bucky you didn't tell me something was wrong. What can I do to help?
Bucky:
Bucky: I like chocolate
-
Wanda: Welcome to the first annual girls night! This place reeks of men, so I thought we needed some women time
Pepper: Why is Vision here?
Wanda: I get sad when he's gone
Natasha: Why is Pietro here?
Pietro: Slay queens
Wanda: Moral support I think
Maria: Why is Peter here?
Wanda: He looked really upset when I said he wasn't included and I felt bad
Wanda: Anyways... yay girls! Who wants me to paint their nails?
Peter: ME ME ME
-
Steve: Pancakes or waffles?
Natasha: Pancakes
Steve: Good because I don't have a waffle maker
Natasha: Then why would you ask-
Steve: It's important for your voice to be heard, as team leader I value your opinion
*2 minutes later*
Steve: Good morning Clint, pancakes or waffles?
Clint: Waffles
Steve: Oh no.
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Some of these were based on requests (ex. more Sam & Bucky, dad Steve w/ Wanda) so if you have certain dynamics you enjoy let me know !
#irondad and spiderson#marvel incorrect quotes#marvel mcu#mcu#incorrect marvel#incorrect quotes#incorrect marvel quotes#avengers#domestic avengers#the avengers#irondad#peter parker#tony stark#steve rogers#bucky barnes#sam wilson#sambucky#natasha romanoff#wanda maximoff#clint barton#pietro maximoff#thor odinson#bruce banner#marvel#vision
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we need more moment where shy!reader was studying and practicing new things to show rafe!! ik that girl is so kinky and it’s always the shy girls <33
YESS omg i srsly love that drabble when i reread it im like she was cookin.. i feel like shes the type to try to prep herself with a dildo bc she can never take all of rafe but imagine he found it n was like ?!!?
really—your boyfriend was too big. it was excessive, and though you could never find the words to tell him to stop or slow down—mostly because you didn't want him to—he always did anyways.
no matter how much you insisted that you could take all of him, rafe didn't like to listen. so you were stuck in a conundrum, and your choices were either lying to your boyfriend that it didn't hurt or accepting the fact that he'll never be as rough with you as you want.
you were willing to sit down and accept a lot of things without a fight—but this was not one of them.
one discreetly wrapped delivery later, you had yourself your very own rafe-sized dildo—a pretty pink color and of such a size that it had your insides churning with anticipation. about half an hour later with the use of some lube and lots of work, you were successfully able to fit about three-fourths. it wasn't perfect, yet, but it was a work in progress.
you didn't want to overdo it and end up insanely sore either, and you were beginning to realize even half was enough to have you cumming over and over again. so much so that you almost forgot about the date you had planned with rafe for that night—scrambling to get up and get ready.
that night, after a nice date and way too much ice cream, you realized you were too fucked out from your afternoon activity to go for another round for rafe. it was no big deal—except it happened the next day. then the day after that. and the one after that.
you had mastered the rafe-sized dildo, and you could take the entire thing after week of practice. but it also meant that it had been a full week without your boyfriend fucking you—something that hadn't happened since you had lost your virginity to him.
a little too clueless around rafe like always, you hadn't realized anything was wrong. rafe was on edge—pent up and unable to keep taking out his frustration on the golf course after almost breaking one of his clubs—but you didn't really notice.
you were waiting for tonight, after another date to show him your new-found skills, but of course, he didn't know that.
getting ready in your bathroom, blasting music and doing your makeup, you don't even hear the door open to your bedroom. rafe came to get you early, knowing you would need more time but way too antsy to wait alone in his car.
he sits on your bed, listening to the muffled music from behind the closed door. he's not impatient with you and hardly ever like this, but the current situation had left him more desperate to see you than usual.
leaning against your headboard, he feels something under your pillow. lifting it to move whatever it was—knowing you, the book you had been reading last night—his jaw clenches when he sees it. a dildo. not just any dildo—a huge dildo. under your pillow like you'd just been using it or something.
the pillow stays in his hand but he has an overwhelming urge to chuck it across the room. was this the reason the two of you hadn't had sex in a week? were you finding pleasure from some stupid toy instead of him?
"rafe?" you ask, stepping out of the bathroom and staring at the scene in front of you with big eyes. you're distractingly pretty everyday but even more so today with a short skirt and done-up face for the date he's not sure if he'll be taking you on.
your face burns with humiliation—stupidly realizing you hadn't put the damn thing away after last night. rafe is looking at you and then looking back at your bed, his fist tight around your pillow.
"um, i-"
"do you wanna explain? i'll give you five fuckin' seconds to explain-"
"no, it's not what it looks like-"
"really, kid? what it looks like is you're fuckin' this stupid thing instead of me. y'know, i'll just fuck off and you can have fun-"
rafe stands, not really angry but still sounding like he is. it's more pent-up frustration bubbling up, but you rush over to him anyways, looking so panicked he feels bad the second he said anything. he can't stay mad at you for longer than a minute.
"it's not what it looks like, i swear-"
"what is it then, huh?"
"i was just practicing! i was just trying to get better for you. see, it's yours." you motion to the toy still on the bed.
"huh?" rafe asks, looking between you and the bed.
"it's you. see. it's like... your size. um-" you get flustered again, shutting up in the fear that you've just said something to rafe that you should have kept to yourself. "i'm.. sorry?"
"no you're not."
"no, but i feel bad. are your feelings hurt? i'm sorry."
when rafe glances back at you, tearing his gaze away from the bright pink that's beginning to hurt his eyes, he realizes how sad you look, thinking you've done something to upset him.
"no, m'fine. just.. tell me next time. it was a jump scare."
"okay.." you stay still infront of him, awkwardly playing with your hands waiting for him to say something. you're a little concerned rafe's still upset, but he doesn't seem to look it, rather looking at you expectedly.
"what?" you question immediately, eyebrows furrowing in confusion.
"what? get on the bed. you've had enough practice. time for the real thing."
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