feminist-fluttershy

[sweet---sadness]

No matter how deep I think the love is, I will always bring that out in a man. There is no such thing as a man that will truly never hit you, there is something deeply wrong with me. I was meant to die a long time ago, everywhere I look there is just reminders that I’m passed due. There’s no softness for me anywhere, no place to feel at home, not with my mother or my father or family or friends. I am bitterly alone and will never be able to make a home with anyone. Any life I try to bring into this world will die just like I should have long before I started fighting this. Love is the only comfort I have and I can’t obtain it in any shape or form. And I never will no matter how hard I try. I am a unloveable, unfixable sack of shit.

[nereidprinc3ss]

light of the morning

in which spencer sneaks into bau!reader's hotel room and they share a little more than just the bed

18+ (smut) warnings/tags: softdom!spence x sub reader, munch!spence, unprotected piv sex (dont do that), creampie (hate that word btw) praise, mentions of having to be quiet because morgan is right next door LOL, fluffy, established co-workers/friends with benefits, soooo idiots in love a/n: here is the promised smut. i am literally kicking my feet and twirling my hair and giggling and blushing at my own writing. I'm gonna have a freak out. requests are open like my legs

It’s late when the knock finally comes. Late enough that you’re dozing on the bed above the covers. 

It takes you a moment to reorient yourself—you’re rubbing your heavy eyes when you finally get the door. 

"Hi."

"Hey," says Spencer, hands awkwardly shoved into his pajama pants pockets. It’s funny, really. He never gets any better at this. 

You step aside and he enters the room, looking around as you close and relock the door. 

"Did I wake you?"

"How could you tell?"

"You’re in pajamas. And you look tired. I mean—you don’t look bad. You never look bad, I just meant… you don’t look tired but you’re not—I didn’t mean to—"

"Relax," you yawn, putting him out of his misery. "I was joking. I know I look tired." You glance at the digital clock on the nightstand. "It’s late. We have to be up early tomorrow."

"Yeah, I got, uh, sidetracked. Sorry."

He was reading. If it was anyone else, you'd be offended--but a sinkhole could open up under Spencer's feet and he probably wouldn't notice if he was absorbed in a book.

You shrug, a knowing smile lifting the corner of your mouth. 

"It’s fine. But I don’t know if tonight is a good night. I really am exhausted."

His eyebrows dart up. 

"That’s fine. That’s totally fine. I’ll just, uh—"

When you don’t move from in front of the door, he pauses, unsure. You bite the inside of your cheek, studying his rangy frame and choice of clothing. Blue pajama pants, slippers, grey CalTech zip up hoodie. It feels wrong to describe a 6'1 man as adorable, but that’s how he looks in his sleep clothes. There’s a very real chance, you find yourself thinking, that you are the only member of the BAU to ever see him in something other than slacks and a button-down. He looks so cozy that you kind of really want him in your bed even if he’s not doing anything but sleeping. The invitation slips out before you can think too hard about it. 

"You could… stay, anyway, if you want?"

His mouth parts slightly, and those eyebrows raise again. There’s a moment of awkward silence and you are very much beginning to regret your offer, wondering if you somehow violated the sanctity of your co-workers/friends with benefits situtationship. Clumsily you try to backtrack. 

"Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, you can—"

"No, no! You didn’t, I just don’t want you to feel obligated to invite me to stay in your room. I’m right across the hall, I can go back if you want me to."

You smile awkwardly, silent relief replacing the brief anxiety. 

"It’s fine. It’s not like we haven’t shared a bed before." And not like you wouldn’t have ended up doing it tonight anyway, if things had gone as originally intended.

He chuckles, looking to the floor and nodding. The blush on his face does not go unnoticed by you. "Fair enough."

It’s incredibly endearing how nervous he still gets after six months of this little arrangement. 

"Do you wanna get your stuff, or…"

"No, that’s okay. I’ll just go back early tomorrow. The chances of someone seeing me leave your room are significantly higher if I do it so soon after entering."

You squint, unable to tell if he’s fucking with you or if that’s an actual statistically sound probability. And then you realize, blissfully, that you don’t really care. 

"Okay, well. Make yourself comfortable. I’m just going to brush my teeth."

Once you’re enclosed in the bathroom, hotel vanity lights blinding you as you brush, you find that there is a jittery sort of apprehension buzzing in your chest. But that’s silly. As you yourself pointed out, the two of you have shared a bed many times over the past few months. But the sleeping together is always a byproduct of the sleeping together. Never have you shared a bed in a completely decent, virtuous, strictly non-sexual manner. It’s always been a matter of convenience—less bother if he doesn’t have to worry about sneaking back into his room in the middle of the night when you’re both exhausted. Or maybe that’s just what you’ve been telling yourselves. 

You rinse your mouth out and exit the bathroom, flicking off the light and finding that Spencer has indeed made himself comfortable. The hotel room is dark and he’s already under the covers, fiddling with his phone. 

"What time should I set the alarm for?" He asks, looking over at you as you crawl into bed, drawing the covers over yourself. "I was thinking 6:23. That should give me enough time to—"

"Sounds perfect," you affirm, wiggling under the blanket as you get comfortable. He schedules the alarm and sets his phone on the bedside table, dousing the room in complete darkness. Your eyes stay open despite, waiting for them to adjust. A few moments of utter silence and stillness pass, and you can tell Spencer is completely stiff next to you. 

"Spencer."

“Yeah,” he answers immediately. Like he’s even more wired about this whole situation than you are. 

"You know you don’t have to avoid touching me at all costs, right? I’m not a leper."

He looses a nervous laugh. 

"I know. We’ve just never really done this."

You frown at the darkness.

"We’ve definitely slept in the same bed before."

"Yeah, but… this feels different."

That, you can’t argue with. Can friends with benefits share a bed just to be near each other? Does that blur some line? And why does it feel more intimate than the sex? 

Screw it. If there is one thing you don’t want your relationship with Spencer to be, it is uncomfortable. Uncertain, you can work with. But not uncomfortable. You reach for him, hand sliding under the duvet—and find his hand already waiting for yours. 

"I don’t think it’s that different," you lie, interlacing your fingers together slowly. 

"Prolonged physical non-sexual contact does have measurable health benefits…" the words are murmured, like the moment is fragile and he doesn’t want to shatter it. 

"Can’t argue with the facts," you breathe, trying to modulate the shakiness of your voice. But you have a feeling you’re doing about as good of a job at concealing your nerves as he is. He shifts.

"Can I…"

"Yeah."

Your heart is pounding as he slips one arm under your neck and the other around your waist, pulling you close. Instinctually you curl into him, slinging your top leg over him as you’ve done before, but always dismissed as post-sex brain chemicals making you feel all warm and fuzzy. A neurological reaction that is so solidly scientific, neither of you ever questioned it. But it feels bigger now. 

He exhales as you settle against each other—a sound of relief that mirrors your own. He’s so warm, so safe as he envelops you, physically and sensorially. In such close proximity, so clear-headed, you notice each layer of his scent. Toothpaste, lavender, vetiver, detergent. You sort of feel like a creep, but you can’t deny how comforting it is. Nor can you deny the pirouette your heart does when he begins minutely rubbing your back, like he’s not even thinking about it. 

"Goodnight," you whisper into his shirt. 

"Goodnight," he whispers back. 

You fall asleep pretty quickly after that. 

------------------------------

It’s unclear what wakes you up—maybe it’s the blue-grey dawn light filtering in through the filthy window (doubtful, it’s still mostly dark) or maybe it’s the blinking green digital clock on the nightstand. 5:02 AM. Your alarm will go off in an hour and 21 minutes.

Sometime in the night you shifted, turning over in your sleep, but Spencer is still holding you close. The arm slung so casually over your waist is slightly domineering, but you manage to rotate again and face him once more. Mere inches away from his face you can see every detail. His expression is so peaceful, it makes your heart ache. 

But you’re just friends. 

Perhaps he felt you moving, because his eyes flutter open and you watch as they flood with consciousness. He takes you in, takes in his arm over your waist. For a split second you’re nervous he’ll pull away. 

"What time is it?" His voice is scratchy with sleep. 

"Five."

"Why are you awake? We have over an hour til the alarm goes off."

"Sometimes waking up early is okay."

His eyes flicker between your own, and momentarily you’re paralyzed as you realize this is a limbo state for the two of you in which you’ve never operated. You don’t know what’s acceptable. You don’t know what to do. Being close to him feels so good, that the idea of separating hurts. But you don’t want to make him uncomfortable, or—

He leans forward and kisses you softly. In the blue light of dawn, rather than frenzied and hidden in the dark, a desperate tear of clothes and teeth and hands—it’s almost freeing. All the anxiety you were feeling just seconds ago begins to melt. 

Friends. 

"You looked anxious," is his whispered answer after he pulls away a moment later, like a kiss is the simplest remedy in the world. He brushes a lock of hair behind your ear. "We should go back to sleep."

"I don’t want to go back to sleep."

The corner of his mouth twitches as he studies you.  

"No? What do you want?"

Emboldened by your mutual indiscretion, it’s your turn to kiss him. You feel him smile against your lips, hand finding the back of your neck and raking up through your hair to pull you closer. 

The delirium of sleep seems to have softened you, filed down the rough edges of your boundaries and kicked away the lines in the sand. What’s a kiss or two when you’ve just woken up? A small, innocuous display of affection while you’re still barely conscious. Nobody could fault either of you for that. People don’t think clearly when they’ve just been asleep.

So what if your lips part against his, and his other hand finds its way under your shirt to stroke the bare skin of your waist and hips? So what if you hitch that leg over him again and press closer?

Spencer breaks the kiss, still ghosting over your lips. 

"I thought it wasn’t a good night?"

"It’s not night time anymore, is it, genius?"

You sneak another kiss, nipping his bottom lip gently as you pull away. 

Instead of whatever array of responses you were expecting, Spencer smiles slightly, eyes almost sparkling in the faint light. The hand on your hip moves to your face, gently thumbing across your cheek. He begins to say something, and stops himself—biting his lip to hold back the words. 

"What?" you ask, heart dropping. Illusion fracturing. 

"I was just—" he begins, pausing for a moment before the words all come out in a rush. "I was just going to tell you how beautiful you are, but I don’t know if that’s something I should say, or if it would feel too… I don’t know…"

He trails off. A rare instance in which he doesn’t have the words. 

You do. Intimate. Real. Romantic. And he’s right, it does feel too much like all of those things. But that doesn’t mean you don’t like it, perhaps more than is strictly good for you. 

"It’s fine. Thank you."

He continues chewing on his lip for a moment. 

"Did I just ruin the mood?"

"No," you laugh, "not at all."

"Thank god," he sighs, surging forward again. 

"Since when do you thank god?" You manage between kisses. 

He moves to press his lips to your jaw and down your neck. 

"Do you want me to talk about the historical and cultural transition of religious expressions into ubiquitous secular colloquialisms right now?"

"Kind of," you breathe.

"No you don’t," he murmurs against your neck as his hands find the hem of your shirt. "You want me to take your clothes off."

Well, he’s not wrong there. 

You help him tug the shirt over your head before leaning back into the pillows as he situates himself over you and lavishes more kisses down your neck and collarbones, pausing to suck a mark only when he knows it’s low enough to be covered by your clothing later. 

You gasp when his lips brush over your nipple, before running his tongue over the sensitive skin. He glances up at you, and though his mouth is occupied, you can see the humor in his eyes. He loves how sensitive you are—how easy it is to get a reaction out of you. 

Of course, you continue to prove him right when he takes the other into his mouth, trying to hold back your little whimpers as he darts his tongue over the peak. Maybe somebody else wouldn’t hear them, but Spencer does. He’s hyper attuned to the sounds you make. Something of a catalogue has begun to form in the back of his mind; he knows exactly what each noise means and how to get them out of you. 

Once satisfied, he moves to press a kiss to your sternum. 

"You’re gonna be quiet for me, right?" Another kiss above your bellybutton. "Because Morgan is sleeping right on the other side of that wall, and we don’t want to wake him up."

"I’ll be quiet," you promise, somewhat breathlessly. Spencer’s mouth trails lower until he’s pulling your shorts down your legs, leaving you completely naked. He tosses them somewhere on the floor and hooks your legs over his shoulders. 

"Good." He plants one last kiss to your thigh and the next one lands right between your legs. 

You regret the need to be silent almost as soon as he drags his tongue over your clit. It’s not like the two of you have ever had the privilege of making a lot of noise, as the hotel rooms are always so close to each other, but it doesn’t make it any easier. 

Instead you opt to rake your hands through his hair and try to take deep breaths. But he knows exactly what you like—he knows starting light and slow, teasing around your most sensitive spot will work you up to the brink of insanity, just like he knows gentle circles make your back arch and elicit the prettiest little moans. 

"More," you beg, and the hands wrapped around your thighs rub soothingly, reassuring you that if you can just be patient you’ll get what you want. 

He takes your aching clit into his mouth, sucking lightly and you’re forced to clap a hand over your mouth, muffling the sob of pleasure you can’t hold back. Spencer keeps it up until you’re practically riding his face, teasing your dripping entrance with the tip of his tongue when you get too close. 

"Fuck, please, Spence," you whisper through your fingers, hips rutting in your desperation. Somehow it always ends up like this—with him in charge and you begging. Not that you have a problem with it, of course. 

He hums into you, and if the way his tongue moves back to circling your clit with newfound fervor is any indication, is apparently satisfied with your entreaty. 

You gasp and try to control your breathy moans, but his mouth feels so good on you that your vision is going out and you’re losing touch with reality ever so slightly. You use the last of your brain power to bite down on the back of your wrist, hoping it adequately muffles the noises you make as you come on Spencer’s tongue and he greedily continues lapping at you. There’s really no way of knowing—your ears are ringing anyway. 

When you come to a moment later he’s peppering kisses on your thighs, rubbing your hips gently. 

"So pretty," he murmurs, climbing back up so your lips can meet again. "Everything about you is pretty."

You paw at his shirt, signaling that you want it off as you moan at the taste of yourself on his tongue, feel your slippery arousal staining the kiss. Spencer helps you, sitting up briefly to unzip his hoodie and pull off his shirt. 

You’re the one to drag him back down, and you notice that he pulls the covers back over the both of you in a sweet gesture he probably didn’t even think about. 

"Need you to fuck me," you beg, reaching down to try and undress him further. 

"So crude. What happened to my nice, sweet girl?" He mumbles against your neck, but helps you with his pants anyway. 

"You must have me confused with someone else."

"Doubtful."

You don’t have much time to consider what that could mean before he’s running the head of his cock over your clit and you’re gasping into his mouth, saying please like it’s the only word you know. 

"There she is," Spencer croons, slipping inside you slow enough for you to feel every inch but quick enough for it to expel all the air from your lungs. Once he’s opened you all the way up, impossibly deep and close, you’re seeing stars, barely breathing. His head has dropped to your shoulder but now he drags his lips up your neck and jaw. "We okay?"

It’s been a while, you realize, since that last case in Maine. He always takes some getting used to. Hardly able to think around the pressure of his cock you nod, trying to string together a few words. 

"Fuck, I need a second." The words come out choked, but you manage. Spencer rubs your hip, his lips brushing yours as he speaks. 

"Relax, sweetheart. I don’t want to hurt you."

He curses to himself, dropping his head momentarily. You’re so fucking soft, and warm, and perfect, he can’t think straight. But he has to try because he has to take care of you. 

"Spence," you gasp, failing to verbally communicate the intensity of the physical sensation. 

"I know, baby," comes his sympathetic coo. "You know you can take me. Deep breaths."

"Mhm," you squeak, trying to take follow his directions and soften your muscles. Spencer keeps rubbing soothingly over your hips, stomach, whatever he can get his hands on, really, pressing kisses all over your face and telling you how good you are, how perfect you feel for him. After a few moments he feels you fluttering around him and experimentally pulls out halfway, before pushing back in equally as slowly. Your jaw drops as he begins to leisurely fuck you, arms wrapping around his back. He gets deeper than you expect every time, rubbing you raw and stretching you out in the most delicious way. 

"Perfect, baby. Such a good listener, did exactly what I asked."

You cry out when he begins fucking you impossibly deeper, but still so slow and sweet.

"You feel so fucking good for me," he groans. "This is what you were made for, huh?" You agree enthusiastically, eyes fluttering shut. 

"Only for you."

Just three words—but he wasn’t expecting to like hearing you say that as much as he does. A strong desire to possess you overtakes him—one that he’ll probably have the decency to feel guilty about later, but for now feels fucking fantastic and intoxicating. 

"Only me?"

You moan an affirmation. 

"Good. I don’t want anyone else fucking you, do you understand me?"

"Yes!"

"I’m the only one who gets to touch you," he breathes, speeding up ever so slightly, "nobody else is going to feel you like this. Such a good girl, spreading her legs for me at five in the fucking morning. You’re not doing this for anybody else, baby."

"Uh-uh, please, pleasepleaseplease Spence—"

He knows what you need, reaching a hand down between your bodies to rub your clit. 

You gasp an airy, high pitched curse, hips twitching but unable to escape the near-punishing rhythm of his own. It’s obvious that your orgasm is close, but you can’t even warn him, too overwhelmed with pleasure. He kisses you, swallowing your moans that have probably become just a bit too loud given the whole hotel thing. 

No words are exchanged between the two of you as you near the finish line for a change, open mouths slipping against each others in what is too messy to be called a kiss. Your orgasm body-slams you, a choked silent scream as you tighten around Spencer and he seems to come at nearly the exact same moment—deep inside you, slowly rolling his hips in a few more strong thrusts as he finishes. 

You let out a delayed moan at the sensation of being filled up, still pulsing around him as he comes to a halt, buried inside of you. He drops his head to your neck, and you can feel each breath against your flushed skin. Other than the panting, you’re both silent for a while. Spencer seems to gather himself sooner than you do, finally breaking the quiet. 

"You okay?"

All you can manage is a little squeak, at which he looses a breathy chuckle. His hand slides to your hip, gently stroking the skin with a thumb. 

"Need your words, angel girl."

"I’m okay," you coo into his shoulder, but he has to strain to hear it above his own breathing. 

"Yeah? Why so quiet?"

But it seems that at least for the moment, he’s gotten all the words he can out of you. When he tries to move, you whimper indignantly, clutching onto him tighter. 

"I really did a number on you this time, huh?" He laughs when you nod into him. "Are you falling asleep?"

"Mhm," you hum dreamily, little puffs of warm air slowing against his neck. 

"You can have…" he cranes his head to check the digital clock, "48 minutes."

"An hour."

He settles his weight on you once more, pressing a chaste kiss to your throat. His voice is low and gentle as he admonishes you. 

"I said 48 minutes."

But it doesn’t matter—you’re already asleep, or close enough to it. Spencer takes the opportunity to shift you to your side, and the way you wrap around him like a vine even unconsciously makes his heart ache. He really should go now—the earlier he gets out of your room the less likely certain complications will arise—but how can he possibly leave you like this? A vulnerable, dreamy girl with tangled hair haloing around her on the pillow case, clinging to him with blind trust that he’ll watch over her as she sleeps? No—there’s no way he’s leaving yet. Instead, he brings you closer. 48 perfect minutes will go by far too quickly, he’s sure. 

[imaginespazzi]

Part 6: To Trying Again

Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10

I don't wanna mess this thing up (I don't wanna push too far)

(In which an "evil" writer might surprise you guys just a little bit with this part)

Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd

Themes: Fluff and Angst

Words: 5.6K

TW: Swearing (I think that's it?)

A/N: Happy Monday lovelies! This is sort of a filler-ish short chapter though I do think it's important to both plot and character development. I'd like to preface this by saying I've never been to Minsk or Park Pieramohi so I'm very much going off of pictures. Editing and I remain on very, very bad terms so pretty please let me know of typos so I can fix them. As always, let me know what you liked, what you disliked and what you'd like to see going forward. Have a lovely rest of your week my loves <3

July 2018 

“You’re being too loud,” Azzi whisper-screams at the blonde girl in front of her as she closes the door to her room behind her with a little too much force. 

Paige turns her head back every-so-slightly with a pronounced eye roll, “will you please relax.”

“I would if you’d just be a little more careful,” Azzi glares, taking cautious steps as if the sound of her sneakers across the carpeted floor could potentially wake up any of the coaches. 

“Azzi,” Paige says exasperatedly, “the coaches are all the way on the other end of the hallway. Besides, they're probably all sleeping.”

And despite her stubbornness, Azzi can concede that Paige has a point there. It’s nearly midnight and the game against Spain earlier in the day might have had a final score that made it seem like the USA U17 women's basketball team had won handily, but the game itself had been draining to say the least. The post-victory dinner had featured a bunch of worn out teenagers gobbling their food without much conversation and a cohort of coaches who seemed like they needed an hour of drinking followed by good night’s sleep. But even the exhaustion of the day hadn’t been enough to prevent Paige Bueckers and her diabolical mind from coming up with the idea to sneak out into the city of Minsk. 

“No,” Azzi had said immediately even before the words had been spoken, that shimmering glint in Paige’s eyes a dead giveaway as she sidled up to Azzi at the salad bar. 

“You don’t even know what I’m going to say,” Paige had pouted. 

“You never say anything good.”

“That’s crazy. You’re so mean to me.”

“So mean,” Azzi had nodded in agreement, “so how about you go and bother someone else.”

“Azzi please. We haven’t had just Paige and Azzi time in ages. Don’t want someone else. Just want you.”

And after that well, there wasn’t really any chance of saying no. Azzi’s only fifteen and she doesn’t know that much about love, but sometimes when Paige looks at her with those earnest blue eyes and a smile that promises i’ll always be here, she thinks the way her heart starts to flutter erratically to a beat of and i wouldn’t want anyone else to stay, might just be the start of her finding out. 

“See,” Paige grins triumphantly as the two girls find their way out of their hotel and onto the street, “told you we wouldn’t get caught. Shit’s just too damn easy.”

Azzi rolls her eyes at the attitude, “don’t tempt fate.”

“Fate’s got nothing in front of Paige Bueckers. I make my own fate,” Paige winks as she links her arms through Azzi. 

It’s a mundane amount of contact, absolutely nothing special to it, but Azzi feels herself shiver in spite of the humidity that’s circling around them. She doesn’t quite know how it happened. One moment she was staring across the court, judging the skinny blonde practicing free throws and coming to the conclusion that she’d be no threat; the next moment said girl was next to her on the plane back from Argentina and Azzi, a self-admitted introvert, found herself rattling off about everything and nothing with this girl who seemed to have discovered the keys to all of Azzi’s locks. Hours of talking had bled into days and days had bled into months and despite the fact that facetime had taken the place of in-person conversations, the word friendship had seemed too cavalier a word to describe the relationship Paige and Azzi were building. 

Paige had whittled away all of Azzi’s carefully constructed armor until she was buried deep underneath her skin and Azzi’s sure there’s no knife in the world sharp enough to carve the blonde out from where she lives underneath Azzi’s ribcage. Azzi doesn’t want anyone to try and dig her out. She  thinks she might bleed out if they do. 

“Az,” Paige whines, waving her free hand in the younger girl’s face, “are you even paying attention to me?”

“That depends,” Azzi hums, “are you saying anything interesting?”

“I’m always saying something interesting.”

“You’re always saying something. The interesting is subjective,” Azzi teases, laughing when Paige pouts. 

“I sneak you out to give you an adventure and this is how you repay me? With insults?” Paige puts a dramatic hand to her heart.

“Walking boring streets is not an adventure. Virginia has streets too.”

“It’s not about the streets, it’s about where the streets lead to,” Paige says with grave seriousness. 

Azzi raises an eyebrow, “are you entering your philosopher Paige era?”

“I’d make a good philosopher,” Paige waggles her own eyebrows as they two girls find themselves entering park Pieramohi. 

“Virginia has parks too, you know Paige?” Azzi says skeptically. 

Paige lets out a dramatic sigh, “will you just keep walking, woman. Sometimes I wonder if you even like me?”

It’s said like a joke but there’s a hint of insecurity beaded into it that buzzes in Azzi’s ears as she wraps a careful hand around Paige’s wrist, stopping the two of them where they are. 

“Hey,” she whispers softly, nudging the older girl, “you don’t ever have to wonder with me. I’m always gonna like you Paige. Even if you’re a pain in my ass half the time.”

“Had to ruin it with the last part, didn't you?” Paige complains but her eyes twinkle at the reassurance, “Just so you know I’m gonna be a pain in your ass forever.”

“I’m gonna hold you to that,” Azzi promises as they continue strolling through the park. 

The silence is peaceful and the breeze that flows around them is like a comforting hug. And Azzi thinks that she’d be okay if there wasn’t a destination for them to get to, as long as the journey came with Paige by her side. 

“We’re almost there,” Paige says slowly, a slightly nervous edge to her voice. 

“You sure you’re not just getting us lost-” the teasing quip dies on Azzi’s tongue as she stares at the scenery in front of her. They’re standing on the edge of a bridge overlooking a lake and it looks like something out of a disney fairytale; the picturesque image of green trees silhouetted against a magically starry night is captured perfectly on the still surface of the water that’s flowing beneath. As Azzi peers across the railing, Paige right next to her, she feels her breath hitch at the reflection that peers up at her. Because the view in front of them is beautiful but Paige’s eyes are on Azzi and she’s staring at her as if the view is nothing in comparison. 

“C’mon,” the blonde says softly, lacing her fingers through Azzi’s as she tugs her along, “I have a plan.”

“There’s more?” Azzi asks in awe as Paige guides her to the gazebo in the middle of the bridge. 

“Just a little bit,” Paige says and oh- that shy smile is different. Azzi doesn’t think she’s seen that one yet and she makes a mental note to herself, to memorize it and store it along with all of Paige’s other smiles that make Azzi’s insides swoop like a rollercoaster. 

She watches intently as Paige begins to peruse through the purple rucksack she’d been carrying. The first thing out of it is a picnic blanket and then a horde of different snacks, all of Azzi’s favorites. Two plastic champagne glasses are next and then a sheepish grin as Paige pulls out a bottle of soda. 

“Couldn’t quite risk trying to get alcohol,” Paige scratches at her neck. 

“Next time maybe,” Azzi shrugs as she helps Paige set up the arrangement and she feels herself fluttering at the thought of doing this again and again and again. 

“How’d you even find this place?” she asks as Paige begins to pour out the soda. 

“You ever heard of googling?”

Azzi rolls her eyes at Paige’s teasing smirk, “how’d you even have time to do this?”

Paige is quiet for a second as she passes Azzi her glass, “wanted to do something special for us,” she says quietly, keeping her eyes intently on what she’s doing as she pours out a drink for herself, “wasn’t hard to find time for you.”

“You could be a poet, Paige Bueckers,” Azzi whispers and she knows it’s unfair of her but she thinks it anyway. As long as all your poems are about me. 

“The poets are lucky I chose a ball instead of a pen. They’d be out of a job otherwise,” Paige says, trying to ease back into the more familiar arrogance. 

“Always so humble,” Azzi says, rolling her eyes as she holds up her glass, “alright what are toasting to?”

“I came up with this whole thing. You can come up with a toast,” Paige scrunches her nose and Azzi shakes her head at it. 

She thinks for a second before smiling brightly at the girl in front of her, “let’s just keep it simple and toast to us.”

“How original,” Paige teases but she clinks her glass against Azzi’s anyways, “here’s to us.”

“Here’s to us,” Azzi repeats as they both take sips of soda. 

They melt into a comfortable silence, relishing in this rare moment where there isn’t a screen separating them from each other. Facetimes is a wonderful creation but a blurry screen, Azzi decides, doesn’t nearly do justice to just how damn pretty Paige is. Her hair is golden as it basks in the glow of the moon and Azzi wonders if the stars are jealous of how brilliantly the blonde’s blue eyes twinkle.

It’s Paige who speaks first, her voice hesitant, “you uh- you never asked me how my date went a couple of weeks ago.”

Azzi feels her whole body go rigid. She’d almost forgotten about Paige’s wretched date. The blonde had told her about it a couple of days before the actual event and Azzi had played the dutiful role of a best friend, teasing Paige with a light-heartedness she didn’t feel and congratulating her with an excitement that came from anywhere but from the heart. She’d purposely avoided Paige’s calls the day of the date and then two days after, coming up with some sorry excuse she no longer remembers. On the third day, when the hollow ache of i miss her voice in her chest had become too hard to ignore, Azzi had finally picked up the phone and diverted the conversation straight to a different topic. She hadn’t thought of the date since. 

“Guess it slipped my mind,” she says airily, fingers gripping the edge of the picnic blanket. 

“I could tell you about it now,” Paige says slowly. 

I’d rather you didn’t, Azzi thinks but that’s a thought that veers a little too out of the sphere of best-friend-isms and so she simply nods her head, “y-yeah tell me about it. How was it?”

“It was nice,” Paige begins and there’s something hidden in her tone that Azzi can't quite place but she’s a little too busy sulking at the idea of Paige with anybody else to try and decipher it, “dinner was good. Took her to a movie after. That was good too.”

“That’s cool P. I’m glad- I’m glad you had fun,” Azzi says nonchalantly, gripping the glass in her hands just a little too tight. 

“I didn’t.”

“What?”

“I didn’t really have that much fun,” Paige clarifies and Azzi gawks at her in confusion as the older girl fidgets with the frayed edges of the picnic blankets, “just didn’t- didn’t feel right. Don’t think she had much fun either. She never texted me after.”

“What a bitch,” Azzi bites out, suddenly irrationally angry at a girl she’d never met because how could anyone possibly not have fun with Paige, “I’m sorry P. You deserve-”

“I didn’t care that she didn’t text back-”

“Still. It’s just the decent thing to do,” Azzi rants. 

“Maybe,” Paige shrugs, “but I didn’t have time to care about that. I had other things on my mind. Like the fact that you weren’t talking to me.”

Azzi flinches at the accusation, rushing out her previous defense, “I was busy.”

“Bullshit,” Paige sneers. 

“Paige-”

“But I get it,” the older girl says softly as she reaches for Azzi’s hand, tugging the brunette closer to her and Azzi feels something inside her erupt at how close their faces are, “I probably wouldn’t have talked to you for two days either if you went on a date with someone else.”

“Oh,” Azzi breathes out and there’s probably something more eloquent she should say but there’s this realization of maybe you feel it too that’s beginning to creep up her spine, rendering her speechless as Paige continues to stare at her like she’s mapping out all the tiniest details of Azzi’s face. 

“The whole date, I kept thinking how you wouldn’t order what she ordered off the menu or that you would probably hit my hand if I tried to steal something off your plate but then give it to me anyway. And that the movie would never have been so quiet with you and we’d probably get yelled at for giggling too much and I-” Paige pauses, dragging in a deep breath, “I definitely would’ve kissed you at the end.”

A sigh of relief escapes Azzi’s lips, “you didn’t kiss her.”

“No,” Paige confirms as she drops her forehead against Azzi’s, “but I-,” the blonde gulps nervously and Azzi can’t help the way her hand reaches up to caress the blush forming on Paige’s cheeks. 

“Ask me,” she whispers.

“I really want to kiss you,” Paige confesses, voice shaking slightly, “can I kiss you?”

Azzi doesn’t say anything, choosing to reply instead by pressing her lips softly against Paige’s. They move slowly at first, testing each other’s boundaries and savoring their first taste of each other. Azzi pulls the older girl onto her lap, hands firmly on Paige’s hips as the other girl clasps her own hands around Azzi’s neck.  It’s a little messy and uncoordinated and Azzi thinks they might need to practice a little more to really get it right but still, it’s everything.

And Azzi just knows

She knows it then just the way she knew Tim was meant to be her dad. The way she knew Jon and José were meant to be her brothers. The way she knew she was meant to play basketball. Azzi knows that she’s meant to fall hopelessly in love with Paige Bueckers. 

March 2033

There are three things Azzi should do. 

Push Paige away 

Tell her this a bad idea 

Run the fuck away

She does none of the above.

Instead Azzi kisses Paige back. 

And it’s still everything. Like the sun and moon are colliding and creating something so insanely powerful; something that feels so eternal. 

There’s nothing soft or slow about it as Paige presses every inch of herself into Azzi until she can feel Paige’s heartbeat as strongly as she can feel her own. It might be impossible but she swears their hearts are talking to each other, tapping out rhythms against each other’s chests that confess all the things their owners are too scared to say. And Azzi wants nothing more than to lose herself completely in the moment because Paige’s lips feel like a drug and Azzi thinks she might just be an addict in relapse. 

Except to relapse, you need to have recovered. And Azzi doesn’t think she ever fully recovered from Paige. 

It isn’t until she feels her back hit the edge of a desk and the sound of something crashing onto the floor infiltrates her ears, that Azzi finally comes to her senses. She tears her lips away from Paige as the older woman groans in protest, arms tightening their hold on Azzi’s waist so she can still have some semblance of control over the situation. And really Azzi knows she’s strong enough to escape Paige’s grip, could easily fight it if she wanted to. But well, she doesn’t want to. And Azzi’s tired of doing things she doesn’t want to do. 

“Paige-”

“If the next words out of your mouth are ‘we can’t do this’, Azzi I swear to god I’m going to kill you,” Paige threatens, pressing her forehead against Azzi’s. 

Azzi laughs softly and she can feel Paige’s whole body relax at the sound of it and like clockwork, she feels the tension beginning to release from her own muscles, “if you kill me then we definitely can’t do this.”

“I’ll revive you after or something,” Paige says with a half-smirk. 

“Or something,” Azzi rolls her eyes, “but we can’t-”

“Azzi,” Paige groans. 

“We can’t do this right now and definitely not here,” Azzi amends, alluding to the fact that they’re still in Steph’s office. 

Paige raises an eyebrow, cocking her head slightly, “but we can do this later? Somewhere else?”

The question lingers between them as Azzi bites her lip. She knows what this is, knows that it’s Paige putting the ball in her court. A ‘no’ would likely be the end of things and that scares her more than she’s willing to admit but she’s not quite ready to commit to a ‘yes’ yet, even if that flame of desire inside of her, the one that can only be lit by Paige, is blazing hot through her veins. 

“I don’t know,” Azzi says carefully, shivering at the way Paige’s thumb is rubbing circles against her waist, the flimsy material of her shirt doing nothing to prevent the goosebumps forming on her skin, “TBD.”

“That’s not a no,” Paige says carefully, hope blossoming freely on her face. 

“That’s not a yes either,” Azzi warns half-heartedly. 

“But it’s not a no,” Paige presses. 

“No,” Azzi admits, playing with the neckline of Paige’s shirt, “it’s not a no.”

And Azzi’s so scared of the future, scared that if she lets herself burn, she’ll incinerate everyone around her but there’s something in the way Paige smiles at her words. Something that feels a lot like a promise of i’ll be the rain that washes out the fire before you can turn us to ashes. 

“I can work with that,” Paige says softly, tilting Azzi’s chin up. 

“So desperate to get back into my pants Bueckers,” Azzi teases and she expects a witty remark in return but instead she’s met with nothing but sincerity. 

“So desperate to get back into your life,” Paige whispers, voice cracking on the last two words. 

Tears prickle against Azzi’s waterline as she stares in awe at the girl in front of her. Sometimes she thinks Paige doesn’t even know that there’s a halo of goodness sitting above her head, doesn't even know just how beautiful her soul is. Paige is stunning on the outside; it’s something no one can deny. But it’s nothing compared to how gorgeous she is on the inside, nothing compared to how kind, how humble, how forgiving Paige is. 

“Why?” Azzi asks, her tone rife with heaviness. 

“Why what?” 

“After everything, after all this time, why would you still want to be in my life?” the tears fall harder as Azzi struggles to breathe, “I- I broke your heart. I broke us. How could you possibly want that again. How could you possibly want me again?”

Paige's eyes soften as she cups Azzi’s cheeks, thumbs brushing away at the drops of water running down them, “because you’re Azzi. My Azzi. And I get it- I get that you’re not ready to be all in on this with me yet and if I’m being honest with myself, I’m not completely ready either. But we can work on it right? Take it slow and see where it goes and maybe we’ll- maybe we’ll be even better this time.”

“You think so?”

“I believe so.”

Azzi presses her lips delicately against Paige’s, reveling in the way it makes Paige’s breath hitch. She pulls away faster than she would like herself and Paige chases her lips, eyes still closed. 

“What was that for,” the blonde asks, slightly dazed. 

“For being my Paige.”

***

Azzi taps her foot impatiently against her wooden patio as she glances at her phone clock for the umpteenth time. Paige is almost twenty minutes late to pick her and Stephie up to go to dinner at her parent’s house. The invites had technically been separate but Paige had insisted that they needed to go together because Paige didn’t want to walk into the house alone. Azzi’s not sure why Paige is nervous to see her dad and brothers again, not when she’s pretty sure they’re bursting with excitement to see the blonde whose pictures still have a permanent place on the family photo wall, but if Paige wants Azzi by her side, well she’s not going to say no. Not anymore. 

 It’s been a week since they’d agreed to take things slow and Azzi’s still not quite sure what exactly that means, but she thinks she likes it. She likes being able to call Paige and not having to come up with a lame excuse for why. She likes that she and Paige can take Stephie out for ice cream after Curry Camp and they don’t have to pretend they’re only tolerating each other’s presence for the little girl’s sake. She likes that they can brush their pinkies while walking and instead of jolting away, they simply just link them together. There’s boundaries of course. No sleepovers at either of their houses. No doing anything more than kissing. No kissing in front of anyone else and definitely no kissing in front of Stephie. No doing anything in front of Stephie really. And there’s still so much mountain left to climb but as long as they’re pushing up it together, Azzi doesn’t think there’s any incline steep enough to stop her from continuing up this path.

“Miss Buecks,” Stephie squeals as Paige’s car rounds the corner into Azzi’s driveway. 

Paige steps out of the car, arms wide open and ready to catch Stephie as the little girl goes tumbling down the front porch, aiming straight for the blonde. Azzi’s not an artist by any means but if she was, she thinks she could paint a thousand pictures of Stephie and her Miss Buecks. It terrifies Azzi a little bit, just how perfectly Stephie fits into Paige’s side but it calms her too because there’s a part of her that’s in love with how much they love each other.

“You’re late Bueckers,” Azzi chides as she follows her daughter’s path down the patio stairs. 

Paige grins, shifting Stephie on her lap as she opens the side door to her car to pull out two bouquets of flowers

“Will these make up for it?” she asks slyly as she hands the larger one, an assortment of pink flowers, to Azzi and a slightly smaller bouquet of purple hydrangeas to Stephie. 

“These are so pretty Miss Buecks,” Stephie gushes before pressing a kiss to Paige’s cheek left cheek and Paige beams at the compliment, “thank you Miss Buecks.”

“You took that long to get flowers?” Azzi asks with a raised eyebrow. 

“Mama,” Stephie chides immediately, “you’re supposed to thank someone when they give you a gift.”

“Yeah Azzi,” Paige’s eyes glimmer with mirth, “thank me like Stephie thanked me. Don’t you think Mama owes me a kiss on the cheek Steph?”

Azzi narrows her eyes at the scheming pair in front of her as Stephie nods animatedly at Paige’s question, “yeah Mama you owe Miss Buecks a kiss on the cheek.”

Shaking her head, Azzi walks over to Paige taking deliberately steady steps. Slowly Azzi leans in, puckering her lips. Paige closes her eyes and Azzi winks at Stephie who’s eyes widen. 

“I’m waiting,” Paige sing-songs, a self-satisfied smirk taking over her features. 

And instead of the promised kiss, Azzi licks a sloppy strip down Paige’s cheek and the blonde shrieks as both Azzi and Stephie burst into laughter.

“EW AZZI GROSS,” Paige whines, hurriedly rubbing her shirt against her cheek, “is this what you’re teaching your daughter?”

“I’m teaching my daughter not to let anyone manipulate her,” Azzi says, giving Paige a careful look, “now why were you late?”

Paige grins sheepishly as she opens the door to the backseat of the door. A lavender car seat is placed on the left side of the car and Azzi feels her heart lurch with no one’s ever cared like this. 

“It’s pu-ple,” Stephie claps excitedly, “is it for me?”

“Of course it is,” Paige confirms, booping Stephie’s nose before looking at Azzi, “it’s just- we uh- we always have to take your car cause it has the car seat and moving it between cars is such a hassle. So I just thought- you know- I just thought it’d be cool- useful- practical- if I had one too? And this way if you ever need me to take Stephie off you then I uh- then you don’t have to worry about me driving. I don’t- I don’t really knows much about car seats but I looked it up online before and the person at the store agreed that this is definitely the best one- like I swear it’s safe-”

She’s cut off by the feel of Azzi’s lips pressed to her cheeks. 

“Thank you Paige.”

***

Just as Azzi expected, Paige merges herself back into the Fudd family with the same ease she’d first had when she’d carved out a place for herself almost a decade and a half ago. It’s a little emotional at first when Tim opens the door, a smile almost as big as him decorating his face as he pulls Paige into a hug even before she can say a word. 

“Welcome home kid,” he whispers into her blonde hair and Azzi doesn’t have to see Paige’s face to know that her best friend is blinking away tears. 

Guilt surges in Azzi’s stomach and she tries to swallow away the lump of i took this from her that’s blocking her throat. It had been so simple at 15 to give Paige a part of her world; Azzi hadn’t thought twice about it. And then with the snap of her fingers, she’d taken that world away. She knows her parents had never cut Paige out; hell they’d been at her wedding to some other woman -and Azzi had pushed them to go knowing Paige would need it- but it was a far cry from what they’d been. A far cry from when Paige’s schedule was a key factor while planning Fudd family summers. 

“Hey,” Stephie pouts, tiny hands crossed over her small body “I thought you always gave me the first hug Pops.”

“We’ll make an exception today,” Tim says with a wink before letting Paige walk into Katie’s arms and spinning his granddaughter around, “but you’re always gonna be my favorite.”

“I better be,” Stephie threatens and the adults around her laugh. 

And finally it’s Azzi's turn to be pulled into one of her dad’s patent bear hugs. She goes willingly, always at her most warmest in the arms of the man whose blood might not run through her veins, but whose love had always protected her from the cruelties of the world. 

“You look really happy today sweetheart,” Tim says softly. 

Azzi’s eyes flitter over her father’s shoulder to where Jon and José are embroiling Paige in a group hug with Stephie in the middle of it, screaming about finally having their “white sister” back, as Katie and José’s fiancé Tallulah roll their eyes at the group of them, and she can’t help but smile into her dad’s shirt, “I feel pretty happy today.”

*** 

“You cheated,” Jon yells. 

“Miss Buecks does not cheat,” Stephie yells back loyally. 

“Don’t get into this Stephie. You don’t know her like we do,” José glares at Paige who narrows her eyes at him, “she’s been stealing from the bank.”

“Miss Buecks does not  steal,” Stephie defends again, wrapping her arms around Paige’s neck from behind as the blonde presses a quick kiss against Stephie’s temple. 

“It’s okay Stephie,” Paige reassures, gently swinging the little girl into her lap, “some people are just sore losers.”

“Can’t be a sore loser because I didn’t lose-” José coughs and Jon corrects himself immediately, “because we didn’t lose.”

“Y’all let it go,” Tallulah groans, leaning her head back against the sofa, “it’s literally just monopoly. Please, I'm so tired.”

“Just monopoly? JUST MONOPOLY?” José guffaws dramatically, “I can’t believe I’m marrying someone who doesn’t understand that it isn’t just monopoly Tallulah. It’s about liars and cheats and honor-”

“Miss Buecks has plenty of honor,” Stephie says stubbornly, leaning her head back against Paige’s chest.

Jon rounds on Azzi, who’s been silently watching the situation, “did you help her cheat?”

“Excuse me?” Azzi asks, glaring at her brother from where she’s been comfortable reclining on the sofa. She’d opted to be the banker instead of playing, content just handing out money to the rest of them while watching the game unfold. But really she hadn’t been paying much attention to anyone else but her daughter and Paige. Stephie didn’t quite understand the rules yet and so she was always on someone’s team. It had been a given tonight, that of course she would be with Paige. And Azzi had watched, trying not to be too obvious, with a foolish grin on her face, as her two favorite people whispered to each other, Paige listening intently to all of Stephie’s ideas whether they were good or bad. 

“Oh good point,” José turns to look at Azzi too, “you’re the banker, did you help Paige cheat?”

“Mama would never cheat,” Stephie argues defiantly as Azzi pushes herself up from the sofa to send a menacing look to both of her brothers. 

“I’m not going to dignify that accusation with a justification,” Azzi says, standing so she’s towering over her two brothers who are still sitting on the floor, “now clean up the game. It’s almost Stephie’s bedtime.”

 They might be well into their twenties and José might be taller than her now, but they’re still not quite  immune to Azzi’s wrath. Tallulah and Paige snicker as the two men, sulking at each other, obey their older sister's command without another word. 

“You’ve gotta teach me how you do that,” Tallulah says, hi-fiving Azzi who smirks in response. 

“Miss Buecks,” Stephie whispers, “what does dig-ni-fy mean?”

“Mean she’s not gonna entertain your uncles being dumba-”

“Paige!”

“Being dumbapples,” Paige corrects and both Azzi and Stephie give her an odd look at her ridiculous attempt at saving the bad word from leaving her lips. 

“Alright Stephie-bean,” Azzi says, pulling her daughter off of Paige’s lap, “it’s late enough. Off to brush your teeth you go.”

Stephie looks hesitantly between the staircase leading up to the guest bedroom -where she and Azzi normally stayed- and Paige. 

“Can Miss Buecks stay with us tonight?” she asks softly, one hand bunching in Paige’s shirt as she stares up at her mother with large doe eyes, “please Mama.”

“Stephie I don’t think-” Paige begins, ready to stick to the boundaries they’d laid out for themselves and really Azzi should let her; should follow her lead really.  

Except the words are tumbling out of her mouth before she can stop them, “yeah she can- she can stay.”

“YAYY,” Stephie squeals, jumping into Azzi’s arms as Paige stares up at her in surprise, “thank you, thank you, thank you Mama. I’m so happy,” she swings from Azzi to Tallulah, “aunty Tully did you hear? Miss Buecks is gonna stay with us and you can make her your famous pancakes in the morning.”

“I can, can I?” Tallulah asks with a raised eyebrow as she lets Stephie and her excited chatter lead her towards the bathroom. With Jon and José both having already started towards their own rooms and Azzi’s parents fast asleep, it leaves just Paige and Azzi in the living room. 

“You’re okay with me staying?” Paige asks softly, finally lifting herself from the floor and onto her feet. 

Azzi scratches the back of her neck, “if- if you want to. You don’t have to. I can- I’ll explain to Stephie-”

“I want to,” Paige says, taking a cautious step towards Azzi, “but the rules?”

“This doesn’t count,” Azzi justifies and Paige smirks, taking another step towards the brunette. 

“It doesn’t?”

“We said no sleeping over at each other’s places. This is my parent’s house. So technically it doesn’t count,” Azzi shrugs, trying to keep her face from breaking into a grin as Paige moves one more step closer. 

“And where exactly am I sleeping?” Paige asks with a knowing grin as she loops an arm around Azzi’s waist, briefly checking to make sure no one’s around. 

Azzi tilts her head, letting the grin break through, “I think Stephie would like it if you slept with us.”

“Ah well if that’s what Stephie would like,” Paige says, nodding commiseratingly. 

“For Stephie’s sake,” Azzi repeats as she wraps her arm around Paige’s neck, pressing her forehead against the older girl’s and letting herself just breathe in the peace that comes with being all consumed by Paige. 

“Azzi,” Paige’s voice is laced with uncharacteristic vulnerability as she speaks again, “you won’t- you won’t run away again tomorrow morning will you?”

“No,” Azzi promises, gently brushing her lips against Paige’s, “I won’t run away again.”

[turtle-steverogers]

Consider: Bucky lets Alpine wander all over their kitchen counters if she pleases. Steve, however, tries to keep her off the counters. Sometimes Bucky walks in on Steve having a dead serious conversation with Alpine (sometimes even in his serious, disappointed Captain America voice), like, c'mon, girl, we talked about this.

OKAY CUZ ALPINE AND STEVE'S FEUD FEEDS MY LITERAL SOUL LIKE ON FUCKING GOD THIS IS EVERYTHING TO ME. now this isn't about kitchens or sandwiches, but you get the gist.

also norman is their dog. here is a picture commissioned from the super talented @hopelessartgeek by my dear friend @buffyscribbless !!! coolest thing ever!!!!

Enjoy!!!

-

“Bucky, get your fuckin’ cat, Jesus Christ!”

Steve resists the urge to throw the goddamn thing as Alpine bats his head with her paw for the millionth time since the movie started. Norman was growling up at her, drowning out the sounds of Indiana Jones in the background.  

“If you wanna murder her already, I’m not gonna stop you,” Steve grumbles to Norman, ducking his head as Alpine takes another swing at his ear.

“No, no one is murdering anyone,” Bucky snaps, padding into the room and plucking Alpine up from her purchase on the back of the couch. “You coulda just moved her if she was bothering you so much.”

“I tried!” Steve cries, sitting up indignantly. “She just hissed at me and started doing it again!”

Norman was whining now, turning in circles by Steve’s feet and casting furtive glances towards where Alpine was grooming herself on Bucky’s lap.

“That fucking gremlin seems to only like you,” Steve says, not bothering to keep the distaste from his tone.

“She can sense that you’re bothered with her,” Bucky says, staring lovingly down at Alpine, who is now asleep against his stomach.

“I don’t think cats work like that,” Steve scrunches his nose. “I just think she hates me.”

Bucky shrugs. “She’ll warm up to ya.”

“Hip hip fucking hooray.”

-

“Norman, no! No, Norman, leave her- no- fuck, BUCKY!”

Bucky barrels into the room freezing momentarily to take in the scene of Steve holding Norman back while Alpine shoves soil at them from her perch on one of the windowsills.  

He stifles a laugh and Steve shoots him a glare. “Shut the hell up and get your fucking demon out of the succulents.”

Swallowing his laughter and putting on a solemn face, Bucky crosses to Alpine and sets her on the ground.

“She’s just restless,” Bucky insists. “I just need to get her a cat tree or something.”

“Then fucking do it and don’t let her mess with my plants!” Steve just barely stops himself from stomping his foot.

“Okay, okay.” Bucky raises his hands in mock surrender. “I’ll go do that now. Go walk Norman or something.”

Steve huffs, grumbling to himself as he grabs Norman’s leash off its hook. On his way out, he tosses a middle finger in Alpine’s direction.

“Steven Grant!”

“She deserves it!”

-

It’s the middle of the goddamn night and Alpine is scratching. Bucky had kept to his word and gotten Alpine a cat tree, but since then, the fucking terror has done nothing but scratch the fucking thing. Steve wouldn’t mind if Bucky hadn’t insisted that they keep the tree in their bedroom so, ‘Alpine can sleep near us, c’mon, you let Norman sleep in our bed.’

Steve had lost that argument as soon as the Norman card was pulled. You can’t really argue with hypocritical logic.

“Will you please stop already!?” Steve hisses into the dark quiet of the room, careful not to wake Bucky or Norman up.

He sees Alpine’s yellow eyes turn in his direction and they hold eye contact for a tense moment before she hops up onto the bed next to Steve.

“Oh no you don’t,” Steve says through clenched teeth as Alpine begins to knead her paws into his stomach.

Steve groans, letting his head drop back onto the pillow. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

-

He’s home alone, fist clenched tightly in his hair as he tries to regain control over his breathing.  Norman’s hovering nearby, providing company and comfort, but not coming closer for fear of overwhelming Steve.  

He hadn’t expected the movie he’d been watching to trigger him, but one loud fight and a door slam later, he was 7 years old again, cowering under the kitchen table while his ma and dad screamed at each other. 

The shaking is getting worse and Steve has half a thought to call Bucky, but he’s in a meeting right now at the Tower and that would be unfair to ask of him. No, he could handle this by himself. Everything was going to be okay.

Another shout sounds from the TV and Steve gasps, reaching for the remote and forcefully shutting it off.  He braces his forearms on his knees and leans forward, opening his eyes and attempting to tap back into his surroundings.  Norman comes a little closer, nudging his hand with his nose until Steve begins to run a shaking hand down his head.

It does a little to calm his nerves, but his heartbeat is still too erratic and his senses are still foggy and anxious.  Across the room, Alpine meows loudly and Steve looks up in time to see her knock her plastic food bowl off the counter.  It’s empty and bounces when it hits the ground and Alpine fixes Steve with a look as if to say, ‘feed me’.

Steve huffs out a surprised laugh, panic forgotten as he stands from the couch, crossing to pick up the bowl before filling it with cat food.  He sets it back on the counter and watches in surprise as Alpine nestles her head against his arm before digging into the food.

“Ya know, you’re not actually that bad.” Alpine purrs in response and Steve smiles. “I think I might not hate you.”

Alpine cuts herself off from eating and begins to convulse violently, spitting up a hairball a few moments later.

Steve blinks. “What the fuck.”

Alpine just looks at him again, meowing.

[its-time-to-write]

your mind is not your friend

HUGE shoutout to @whimsical-roasting for being an absolute babe and helping me out of my writing slump. Been feeling like I’m just churning out the same story over and over, but she gave me a prompt that absolutely knocked it out of the park! This actually contains chunks of text from our conversation, she was so helpful. Literally could not have written it without her, so be sure to check out her page and see what she’s got going on.

your mind is not your friend

It’s 2:30am on the dot, and you’re in your car, staring at the steering wheel. How did I get here? you ask yourself, rhetorically. You know exactly how you got to be in this driveway at this god-awful time in the morning.

You had been awake two hours ago, and sent a u up? text to a somewhat-friend you met at a bar a couple weeks ago. He was attracted to you, you needed to blow off steam, and thus your relationship began. “Relationship,” being used in the most technical sense of the term.

Pretty much all you did was hit each other up for sex, but that was kind of the whole point. You had no feelings for him, he didn’t have any for you, so you were in a mutually beneficial friends-with-benefits type situation. No strings attached.

The sex wasn’t bad, it was actually pretty good, especially if it was dark enough and you were feeling delusional enough to convince yourself he was someone else. On occasion you’d have to bite back a moan with the wrong name on your lips, but you’re pretty sure this guy wouldn’t have noticed.

But here you are, at 2:30 in the fucking morning, feeling strangely empty.

As you pull out of his driveway, you promise yourself this is your last hookup with this dude.

You can’t bring yourself to have another night like tonight.

It’s weird. You feel weird. You’re too aware of your arms and legs, and the night lighting isn’t helping anything. There’s barely anyone on the road, and you can’t bring yourself to turn on any music. 

You’re just tired because god, the sex was good, sure, but it was emotionless. He didn’t match your energy nor your affection, and it felt physically draining.

You’re not even sure where you’re driving but you’re sure as hell not going home right now. You pull your car to the side of the road under a streetlight and just sit.

After a few minutes, you pull out your phone and toy with it for a second, then think fuck it and call Jamie. You’re pretty sure it’s too early for him to be awake for training, but you never know until you try, right?

Right. 

He picks up on the first ring. “Yeah, love?” he says by way of greeting, voice thick with sleep. 

“I’m sorry, did I wake you?” you ask. “I wasn’t sure what time you woke up and I’m having a shit night, so I thought I’d just check to see if you were up. You can go back to sleep.”

“Not asleep,” Jamie yawns. “Been up for a bit. You alright?”

You pause. There’s something about Jamie’s voice that’s bringing tears to your eyes. 

“Darling?” he asks softly, “You still there?”

You nod, then remember he can’t see you. “Yeah, I’m still here.” You can’t erase the tears from your voice. 

You can hear Jamie turn a light on somewhere in his house. The mental image of him padding around that big empty house calms you somewhat. 

“It’s just-” you start then stop. 

“Hm?” Jamie hums, encouraging you on. 

“I don’t wanna get into it, but he didn’t even make me feel desirable. The entire night he was like ‘Yeah, sure, whatever. Fine, let's get it over with,’ and I felt like a pity fuck even if we didn't go all the way. And I’m just- just tired,” you finish lamely. 

All you get back is silence. 

“Jamie?” you say, half-pleadingly, desperation tingeing your voice. “Are you still there?”

“I’m here. Come to mine, yeah? I’ll unlock the door, so just walk in.” His voice sounds thick again, almost like he’s crying, but you chalk it up to the early hour and start your car again. 

—

You’re at Jamie’s house in no time at all, walking up the steps through the doorway and into his arms. You can’t even cry at this point, because it just feels like too much work.

“D’you want a shower?” Jamie asks, chin on top of your head. “I already pulled out some clothes for you, and I can throw these in the laundry. They’ll be a little big, but,” he shrugs, arms still around you. 

You tilt your head up and nod, no energy for words. He says “Alright then. You know where you’re going,” so you make your way up the stairs.

“Gonna make some food,” he calls after you, “You know I fuckin�� hate eating alone, so you have to eat some too.”

—

After a long, long hot shower, you’re in Jamie’s clothes and headed back downstairs. Your skin feels raw from where you scrubbed it, but you’re starting to feel more like yourself. As you walk into the kitchen, Jamie looks up from where he’s making grilled cheese on the stove.

He asks, “How you feeling, love?”

Love. Darling. God, his pet names are going to kill you. You’re not sure why you thought this was a good idea.

You’ve been in love with Jamie Tartt for, like, ever. He was just so funny and so sweet and so goddamned sexy. 

You are positive you have no chance with him, given his dating history. He’s not really one for commitment. You figure if he were interested, he would have made a move by now, but he’s comfortable where you are, just being friends.

You’ve been doing your best to erase all feelings from your body, hence: casual sex. 

It was working out great for you in all respects, obviously.

But, to answer Jamie’s question, you just shrug. He seems to pick up on the I can’t speak vibe, so he tilts his head at you, lower lip sticking out in sympathy.

“Right,” he says, flipping a grilled cheese sandwich on a plate, “take this and go sit over there.” He points to the couch. “You want anythin’ to drink?”

You shrug again, so Jamie goes to the fridge and pulls out two bottles of water. He grabs his own plate and you follow him to the couch.

He sits down first and pats the space right next to him, so you sink into the cushion. He adjusts so you’re curled into his right side, arm slung around you.

You eat in silence, and you can feel yourself slowly floating back into your body. It’s funny, really, because you hadn’t realized you were detached. 

The sandwiches are long gone, and you’re feeling more like talking, all wrapped up in Jamie’s too-large hoodie and sweatpants. Your face is the only thing that’s been visible this whole time, hood pulled up. Jamie’s hand has been running a comforting pattern up and down your arm, and it hits you that sitting on the couch with Jamie feels more affectionate than literally kissing a man who was like a damp board of plywood essential.

“I’m sorry.”

Jamie looks at you in surprise. “How d’you mean, love?”

You return his gaze, teary-eyed. “You have training and shit soon, and you’re supposed to be getting rest. I know you lied about me not waking you up. And I shouldn’t’ve bothered you. It’s my problem and my fault that I even feel like this.” You stare at the empty plates on the coffee table in front of you. “God, I don’t know… maybe I’m too affectionate. Like, I was kissing all over his face and he barely even did anything back. I know it’s just sex and not a relationship. I don’t even want him that way. But it just feels like it fucking sucked my soul out of me.”

You feel Jamie shift slightly, and you catch the tail end of what you think is- a wince?

It just makes you feel worse. “I felt undesirable and I KNOW I didn't look it tonight. I looked desirable as fuck. But he kept on being like 'yeah, sure, whatever spread your legs.’ And I want to be wanted, you know.. like, crave me like it's a not a chore.” Your shoulders slump as Jamie sucks in a breath. His hand, which has maintained a steady pace on your arm, is erratic now. You misinterpret the wince and the breath and keep going.

“Look, I know that you… you know, you’ve had sex with a lot more people that I have. I’ve been with like, three, including this guy. I know that I messed up, it’s just- I don’t want to feel cheap, you know?”

You can’t look at Jamie. You’re not sure that you can bear him explaining how you’ve breached some innocuous rule of casual sex. You can feel his eyes burning a hole through the hoodie. You didn’t realize you were using it as protection until you felt like you lost it.

You force yourself not to cry, and determine to pokerface your way through whatever Jamie has to tell you. He slides off the couch until he’s on the floor in front of you reaching for your hands.

“That fucking bag of dicks don’t deserve you,” he says, with such feeling that you’re sure you misheard him. You just keep staring past him at that empty plate.

“Oi, did you hear me?” Jamie says bringing up one hand to gently pinch your chin. “He don’t. Any man that makes you feel this shitty about yourself, especially after spendin’ the night with you, is a fucking piece of shit.” He squeezes your hand. “That arsehole has no fucking idea what he let slip away.”

His words are so far from what you expected that you’re having trouble registering them.

You let out a hoarse, “What are you saying,” and Jamie chuckles ruefully.

“I’m saying- shit. This is a shit time to be telling ya, but fuck it.” He takes a breath. “I really fucking like you. I think you’re fucking great. I’ve hated hearing you talk about that arsehole since the first time you fucking went home with him. Told meself that it should’ve been me you were goin’ home with, not that prick. I love when you’re affectionate. You know, when you fucking… hug me too hard ‘cause you’re excited bout somethin’ or kiss me forehead before leaving. But I didn’t want to fuck up what we already have going, so I didn’t fucking say anything. I should’ve said something a million fucking times, but I’m saying it now. It ain’t your fault. It’s that prick’s fault for making you feel fucking disgusting about the best part of you.”

You’re not starting at the plate anymore. You’re staring at Jamie’s face, and his pleading eyes, and you feel your soul reconnect to your body. You slide off the couch and into his arms, both of you on the floor between the sofa and the coffee table. He holds you like you’re the only thing anchoring him to earth when, in reality, you think it just might be the other way around. 

Jamie wraps one arm extra tight around your waist and heaves you two off the floor. 

“C’mon,” he says, voice muffled from his face buried in your neck, “we’re going the fuck to sleep.”

“You have training,” you remind him into his hair. 

“Nah,” he says, beginning to walk you to the stairs. “Told Coach I was sick right after you hung up.”

“Oh,” you say in a small voice. You can feel him smiling against your skin.��

“Right,” Jamie says. “I’m done fucking talking. Let’s get some proper sleep, yeah?” 

You nod, and he takes you all the way upstairs into his room. It’s the second time within four hours that your in another man’s bed, but this time feels different. This time is checking all the boxes you were looking for, and this time, you have the one you want.  

[lunajay33]

My Beast🐺🪵

Summary: Y/n finds a wolf in the woods but isn’t scared, she finds comfort being around the big wolf and continues to go out to the woods to be with it, until the wolf shows it’s true self

It was the weekend and I thought after the stressful week, I’d decide to go down to La push and relax

I made it to the pretty empty beach and sunk my feet in the sand, I always loved it here, the sound of the waves, the silence away from society, sometimes there would be guys from the reservation but they were always nice when we would interacte

I stayed on the beach for a few hours letting the wind calm me down, then deciding to take a walk through the woods, rarely anyone went out there and most of the time I strayed from the path and wandered around

As I walked through the thick bushes and tall trees I heard a noise, I looked around and saw something in the distance, I followed and once I got closer I realized it was a wolf, I usually would have ran but something about being near this beautiful creature made me wanna stay

It turned around and spotted me, I slowly walked closer and by the look in its eyes it seemed rather calm almost excited

“Hello!” I said smiling

It walked closer and circled me making me laugh in excitement

I placed my hand on it head, gently rubbing its soft fur

“You’re so beautiful, but how on earth did you get this big”

It whined, swaying it’s tail quickly as it laid on the ground, i soon followed

It placed its huge head on my lap and closed its eyes, I could feel it’s strong breathe against my thigh

I brushed my hands through its fur for what felt like forever but in reality it was only an hour, I could stay like this forever

It stood up and walked around me curling its body around me, it’s warmth was so comforting that I ended up falling asleep

When I woke up I felt a push against my stomach, I looked up to see the wolf standing over me, using its snout to wake me up, I sat up realizing it was night time

I stood up feeling sad

“Will I see you again?” I asked knowing I wouldn’t get an answer

But to my surprise it nodded confusing me but exciting me either way

“I’ll be back her again tomorrow, if you understand me please meet me here at the same time” I placed a kiss on its snout and reluctantly started walking away but it followed by my side, all the way until the I got back to the beach then he ran back into the woods

That night I barely got any sleep, all I could think about is how I managed to hang out all day with a huge wolf and leave without a scratch

Once I woke up I raced to get ready, grabbing a quick breakfast and heading back to La Push, the boys were at the beach today, I waved once they noticed me and headed to the woods

I made my way to the same spot as yesterday and the wolf wasn’t there, it was a long shot anyways, to think that the wolf understood me but I sat against a tree, I didn’t want to give up hope just yet

I sat for a while when I saw the wolf running towards me, I stood up and opened my arms as it snuggled it head against mine, I wrapped my arms around it neck and held it close, i still didn’t know if the wolf was a girl or boy but for some reason I had a feeling it might be a boy

“I missed you my pup” I said as I pulled away

It whined and licked my face

“Ahhhh” I laughed wiping my face

It stepped back and leaned down confusing me

“What? Do you want me to get on?”

He nodded and I gently got on, not wanting to pull on his fur, he stood up and ran off shocking me, I leaned down and held around his neck, he was incredibly fast and it felt so freeing

We finally made it to a clearing, noticing a cute house and those boys from the beach were here now, I leaned down and whispered

“Are these your friends?!”

He nodded as I leaned down against him as he laid on the ground letting me hope off but I stayed close, right next to him snuggling into his neck since he was still taller than me

We walked towards the boys noticing they seemed excited

“Hey Seth!” One of them said

“So your name is Seth! It’s nice!” I said and he licked my face again

“Hi everyone! How do you know Seth here?” I asked

“He’s a friend of ours! Part of our pack!” Sam said

I had met them many times but only for small amounts of time

“Wait so…..wait are you guys wolves too or do you just call yourselves a pack for fun?” I asked confused

“It’s true we are all wolves but you must keep this a secret”

“So why even tell me if this is suppose to me kept secret?” I asked

“Seth here will explain everything to you, right Seth?”

“Yup!” I turned to see a boy, a really cute boy standing next to me in only shorts

I didn’t even realize the change

“So you can change into a wolf?” I asked and the look on his face seemed nervous

“Ya it’s in our genes, we turn into wolves to protect people” he said fidgeting with his fingers

“That’s amazing! I wish I could do that, but why show yourself to me?”

“Well as wolves there’s this thing that happens, we can’t control it but we imprint on our soulmates, we are connected to them, to be there to protect, to love, to be a friend, brother, boyfriend what ever the imprint wants and…..I imprinted know you” he said looking at me waiting for my reaction

“So I’m your soulmate?” I said beyond happy, my soulmate is this sweet guy and also a wolf who protect others, I must be the luckiest girl in the world

“Ya you’re my perfect other half”

“Wow this is crazy, I can’t believe I landed the cutest soulmate!” I said

“Hey I’m not cute I’m a man” he whined

“Okay you’re a man, but what does this mean for us then?”

“What ever you want, it’s up to you”

“No I can’t decide everything, this is a part of you too, why don’t we just get to know each other and see how things go!”

“I’d like that a lot!” He smiled and pulled me into a hug, he was still as warm as he was when I first cuddled with him

“I’m proud of you Seth!” Sam said and that’s when I realized the guys were still there but I’m the end I knew that I just became a part of this beautiful and magical family

[haodore]

THE STURNIOLO TRIPLETS HEADCANON

⇢ how the sturniolo triplets would react to you having a nightmare

𓂃 ⋆ 𓈒 masterlist

genre: platonic, hurt/comfort

word count: 0.5k

warnings: nightmares

NICK

you were having a sleepover at the triplets house when it happened, and you decided on sleeping in nicks bed because you and him were always the closest.

the nightmare was horrible, but by the time you woke up, shaking and crying, it slipped from your mind of what exactly the dream was about.

when a hand touched your shoulder softly, you jumped—which was unlike you, you heard: “hey, it’s just me. it’s nick.”

he’d say it in the softest way possible ☹️🫶

hearing his soft voice in the darkness made you feel relieved, and he looked at you worriedly while opening his arms for a hug.

now, let me tell you, nick would absolutely give the BEST hugs.

when you’d fall into his arms you’d feel so warm and safe and loved.

“just go back to sleep. i’ll be right here.”

MATT

you woke up on the triplets living room couch, the horrible nightmare still engraved in your mind as you stood up shakily.

you’d always had a problem with nightmares, but you’d kept it to yourself. you felt a bit embarrassed, to be honest, so normally you wouldn’t tell anybody it happened, and you’d attempt to go back to bed.

this dream, however, was so bad that it was like your mind was on autopilot, and before you knew it, you were standing in front of matt’s door.

you knocked lightly, and he’d open it a few seconds after. he would probably already be awake, to be honest.

the first thing he’d notice would be the way you were holding yourself—you looked smaller, in a way.

“what’s wrong?”

you’d chew on your bottom lip in thought for a moment, deciding if you should tell him. you were already there, so, why not.

“i, uh—had a nightmare.”

matt wouldn’t judge at all either.

“oh, that’s all right. do you wanna stay here for the rest of the night?”

you’d nod gratefully, and don’t tell anyone but matt would secretly be glad you felt so safe with him.

CHRIS

correct me if you think i’m wrong but i feel like chris is the type to be so tired he wouldn’t handle the situation properly??

like, picture this:

you both have a fucked up sleep schedule, at this time you should be awake but you’re not, and you fell asleep in his bed with him sleeping next to you.

you’d wake up, shaking, and the first thing that comes to mind is you need chris’ comfort.

you’d place a hand on his shoulder, shake him lightly until he groans, upset that someone disturbed his sleep.

“chris?”

“what…”

waking people up is literally my least favourite thing ever because i always feel bad, so if you’re like me, you’d hesitate before shaking him and speaking again.

“chris— i had a nightmare.”

his tired brain would mean he’s too tired to really do anything, but not too tired to comprehend what you said.

he’d wordlessly put an arm around your waist before tugging you into his side. “go back to sleep, i’m here.”

had a lot of fun writing this one icl

the sturniolo triplets taglist. @stxrniqlo

[elisysd]

Physical - Dua Lipa

Masterlist - Previously - Next Chapter

I don't wanna live another life 'Cause this one's pretty nice

Charles didn’t leave her side, refusing to go celebrate with the team or anyone for what mattered. He couldn’t, wouldn’t leave Lya, alone. Not anymore. And not certainly in a hospital that reminded him one of the worst moment of his life. Lya was sleeping peacefully and the only thing that could be heard was the regular “bip” from the monitoring machine, breaking the silence of the room. She looked so fragile, in her hospital gown and her being so pale. Charles gulped and let a tear fall. He realised he could have lost her. He had already lost so many people in his life; he couldn’t lose her too. It was unfathomable. She was his family, the one he longed to come home to whenever he was away. If something were to happen to her, he couldn’t get over it.

The white walls made him sick. This place made him sick. Too many dark memories were attached to it and seeing Lyanna there, he couldn’t help but think of his father. He shook his head trying to make the images of his dad go away. He was suffocating, as if an invisible hand was strangling him. And then he broke down. All the events of the day came rushing in. His dire need to gasp for air ended up waking up Lyanna who opened her tired eyes and looked straight at him.

“Charles… Oh my God, Charles, talk to me. Baby, please talk to me.”

She was fully awake. She was dying to stand up and take him in her arms to whisper sweet nothings to him but couldn’t because of everything her body was linked to.

“I can’t lose you, Lya. I can’t. It will break me. If the doctors find something…”

“They won’t find anything. I promise you they won’t.”

“You can’t promise. You don’t know that. I already lost Jules and my dad, I refuse to loose you too. You’re the love of my life. You’re the one I want to grow old with. I refuse to give up on that.”

“And we will grow old together. The doctors are just being careful, okay. Please don’t assume the worst.”

“I want to be strong Lyanna. For you. You need me to be strong.”

“I need you to be you. If you feel the need to break down, please let me be the shoulders you cry on. I don’ t need you to be the hero who will save the day. You can be the little lost boy with me. I want to see all your flaws and failures because it makes me love you more. Not less. Never less.”

Charles took his head in his hands and started to sob uncontrollably. Lyanna tried to scoot over to give him a little space that he took promptly. Carefully, he put his head on her chest, listening to her heart beating steadily. His hands reached for her as he tangled his legs between hers. Lyanna ran her hand through Charles's hair, doing her best to calm him down. She could feel his tears wetting her gown and against her will, a tear escaped her eye.

“I’m staying the night here. I’m not leaving you alone.”

“You can’t stay Charles, the nurses won’t be okay with that.”

“Watch me. I was shit scared today.”

“I’m sorry. Really. But you need to rest and prepare for Canada.”

“I’m not going. I’m staying here, making sure you are okay.”

“Don’t be stupid. You are going, you have a championship to win. And I’ll be fine, no more promo for me, no more shooting, plenty of time to rest and take care of me. I was thinking of a spa day with Carla and your mom. I promise you, I’ll be fine.”

“Fine.” he mumbled. “But you are coming with me for the European races and it’s not negotiable.”

She sighed and kissed his forehead. Charles shifted a little and got up delicately, making sure he was not hurting Lyanna in the process. Willy-nilly, he kissed her one last time , promising her to be there first thing tomorrow as she would go through a series of medical tests and he definitely didn’t want her to do this alone. And if he was honest with himself, he needed to personally make sure she was okay. 

On his way back, he stopped at him mom. He was exhausted and needed the comfort of his mother arms. And he didn’t want to go back to his place without Lyanna. It was hurting him too much. His mother welcomed him with open arms and made him a cup of tea before he proceeded to explain to her what the doctor had said and shared his worries with her.

“Lya is strong Charles, I’m sure she’ll be okay.”

“I hope mom. Because if she isn’t…”

“Shut up. I only want positive thoughts, okay. For Lyanna.”

“I’m so scared mom, I’m just so, so scared.”

“I know, Charlie. I know.”

“It’s been years since you called me that way.”

“It’s been years since I’ve seen you this lost and sad.”

He ended up spending the night in his childhood bedroom and as promised as soon as visiting hours were up, he was in Lyanna’s room with a little bag full of pastries he managed to sneak in without the nurses noticing. Lyanna was already feeling a little bit better, she was not as pale as the day before even if she was still tired. She thanked Charles for the breakfast, complaining about how a glass of orange juice and a tea was simply not enough for her. They chatted for an hour or so before the nurse arrived to prepare her for the biopsy. Lyanna could see Charles gulped and offered him a reassuring smile.

“When will we know if she is okay?” he asked.

“It depends… I’d say, in a week or so but between us the doctor doesn’t suspect anything with her, it’s just a precaution. She is okay and will probably be discharged tomorrow or the day after.”

Charles nodded, feeling a little bit better. But he knew he would feel totally fine once they would have the results and Lyanna would be cleared completely.

And indeed, two days later, Lyanna was back home with a ton of medicines to take but she was better. She felt a little less tired and at least she could walk on her own. The following days, true to his words, Charles was not leaving her side to the point that it started to get on her nerves. That’s why one morning as Charles was packing for Canada, she called Carla to ask if she would like to go shopping with her. She needed to get out of the house and away for Charles and his constant needs to make sure she was okay. He treated her like a fragile thing unable to do anything. If she was listening to him she would have to stay in their bed all day, every day, and she just couldn’t and didn’t want to. That’s what she explained to Charles when expressed his concerns to her.

“I’m suffocating Charles. I love you, I’m so grateful that you have been there for me, you helped me so much but I need to breathe. And to be away from you a little bit, okay.”

“But if something happen to you….”

“Carla will be here. And if it makes you feel better, I text you when I find her and when I’m coming home, okay? But I really need to get out of here and you need to pack.”

“Fine…”

As soon as she found Carla at the shopping centre, Lyanna started to tell her all about how Charles was acting like she was made on paper.

“I love him, I truly do but he was such a pain in the ass. You know, I’m kind of glad he leaves tomorrow because that means that I’ll finally get some time for me. Does that make me selfish? Am I a bad girlfriend?”

“No you’re not, you’re human. But Charles was so scared. We all were. But Charles, it was on another level.”

“I know. Believe me I know, I feel bad enough… That’s why I needed to get out of the house and what’s better than a shopping therapy between girls to forget all about boys problems?”

“100% agree! Any ideas in mind?”

“Since I’ll be coming with him for the European races, I was thinking of finding new outfits especially for that. And we will be going to Wimbledon together so I definitely need to find something cute and dressy and chic for the occasion.”

“I like how you think, Lya.”

She came back late at night and as soon as she opened the door Charles rushed to her to check if she was okay.

“Charles! I’m good! You, on the other hand, need to sleep because you leave early tomorrow.”

“I know but I wanted to wait for you. Did you eat properly? Did you drink enough water? I can prepare you something really quick,if you need…”

“That’s a big no, you stay away from the stove. And I’m fine! I’m just tired.”

“I can give you an extra pillow if you want, so you get more comfortable and…”

“No Charles! I’m tired of you!” she exclaimed stopping Charles in his track.

There was a pause during which Charles looked at her, shocked.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to say it like this…”

“But you mean it.” he added with a sad look on his face.

“I… it’s just… How can I explain without looking like an ungrateful bitch? You’ve been amazing with me. Patient and thoughtful and all. But sometimes, you are too much. I get it, Charles. I know you’ve been scared but the truth is, I’m fine. You are not losing me; you’ll never lose me okay. You need to let your fears aside, I’m not going anywhere.” she explained as she sat down on the sofa taking his hands in hers and forcing him to sit next to her. “Here’s what we will do, I promise you to tell you whenever I feel even slightly sick okay?”

He nodded and put one arm around her shoulders and pulled her against him.

“I know I’ve been a little overprotective. I’m sorry. You’re right, I’m just scared but it stresses me out to still have to wait for your biopsy results and knowing that I probably won’t be there when you’ll get them… I don’t like it.” he confessed.

“What about this, I call you as soon as I receive them and then we can open them together.”

“I think it would make me feel better.”

“Then, it’s settled.”

She got her results the Thursday before the Canadian Grand Prix. As soon as she received the envelope from her doctor, she texted Charles who told her he would call her right after the press conference. When she received his call, he was in a corner near what seemed to be the public toilets.

“So, tell me.” He hurried her.

Slowly she opened the envelope and carefully read the letter.

“It’s negative, Charles.”

“Negative as in you are all good, no trace of cancer or anything?”

“No trace of cancer. I’m all good.”

“Thank God. I could cry.”

She laughed at his reaction. Truth is, she was relieved as well and as much as him.

“Stop it! We are acting dramatic over stupid medical exams, imagine when I’ll tell you that I’m expecting our first child.” she blurted out before gasping.

There was a long silence, a little awkward. They never had that talk, or at least it never had been serious. Of course they both wanted to spend their life together and Lyanna guessed that at some point it could mean having children, but nothing was planned. She didn’t know when she would be ready or if she would be one day. And Charles was focused on his career. There was no way, a child could fit in their life today.

“Yeah… but you’re not, right? Pregnant I mean.”

“No. No I’m not, I’m sorry I don’t know why I’ve said that.”

“No, don’t be. Uhm… I’ve got to go. I call you later, okay?”

It’s a Charles distraught that bumped into Pierre who was on his way back to the Alpine’s hospitality to get a coffee.

“Hey mate, you good?”

“I just had the weirdest conversation with Lya. She is good by the way, no cancer.”

“You must be relieved. It’s a good news. So, what happened?”

“She mentioned us having kids. It was totally out of nowhere and I wasn’t prepared. I might have told her that I had somewhere to go when in fact it’s just that I feel weird.”

“You want kids, though.”

“Yes, I do. And sooner rather than later.”

“Okay, perfect. And with her, right?”

“Of course with her!”

“So, where is the problem? I’m not following or maybe I missed something.”

“I don’t know where the problem is, Pierre! I don’t even know if there is a problem! That’s the problem!”

“Okay… stop freaking out. Get a grip, Charles.”

“I’m not freaking out! Or maybe a little. I don’t know. Do you think I’ll be a great dad?”

“You are amazing with kids, I’ve sen you around my nephews and nieces they love you.”

“But there is a difference between being good with your kids and being good with other people kids. What if my kid resents me because of my job? What if despite trying my best I fail them? What if I’m not making them proud. I want to be the superhero kind of dad, the one they brag about, you know. Not the one they are ashamed of.”

“Charles, you are overthinking it. And I think you have all the answers you need. The fact that you are asking these types of questions just show that you’ll be just good.”

“I don’t want to be just good. I want to be the best dad ever to them.”

From the other side of the Atlantic, Lyanna was freaking out as well, on the phone with her best friend.

“I’m stupid. I’m so stupid. Why did I ever mention kids? Like, I don’t even know where it comes from!”

“It comes from the fact that you have a boyfriend that you love very much and that is not just a random guy in your life, he is the one with who you want to spend your life with. It’s called growing up Lyanna.”

“When did you ever get that wise?”

“It seems like I grew up as well. No but seriously, it will be fine. Talk to him, face to face, I don’t think it’s a conversation to be held over the phone. I’m sure the poor guy is panicking as well.”

“Thank you for listening to my rambling.”

“I love you, you’re my best friend. My annoyingly cute best friend, almost my sister.”

“Shut up you’re going to make me cry!”

“Hormonal much, sweetie?” Emilie joked.

“I hate you!”

When they spoke on the phone later that day, both Lyanna and Charles were careful to avoid any mention of the previous conversation, even though both knew it was on their minds.

Charles scored another podium finish in Canada by taking P3, despite starting from P2, a result of wet weather oscillating between sun and rain and poor tyre management. He was happy to leave Canada, even though it was a track he loved, to finally be able to return to Europe and reunite with Lyanna. Charles didn’t really have the opportunity to enjoy is little time off as it was already time to prepare for Barcelona.

Him and Carlos, especially Carlos, were welcomed warmly by the crowd there, as Lyanna was staying a little on the side, letting Charles talk to his fans and enjoy the moment. She let him do his thing as she started to wander around the paddock, enjoying the sun on her face and the calm before the big rush of the Sunday. She was about to sit outside the Ferrari hospitality with a coffee and a good book when she heard two young girls squealed at her sight.

“Oh my God, oh my God, Lyanna! We are such big fans!”

Lyanna looked in their directions and waved at them. The two girls were wearing Ferrari merch and signed caps with the number 16 on them, making Lyanna smiled.

“Can you sign our caps as well. We already managed to have Charles autographs but we would love to have yours.”

“Yeah, sure. Do you have a sharpie or something? I was not expecting that to happen so I didn’t really come prepare.”

“Well, we did! We love you and Charles together, you are so cute and couple goals together.”

“Thank you! And we’re not goals, believe me. We are a normal couple with their own problems and disagreements sometimes.” she laughed as she was putting her signature next to Charles’.”

“And we are so excited for Flowers and Crown! Ferrari as well! Is Charles doing a cameo in it? There were some rumours online about it.”

“Well, at the risk of disappointing, no Charles in the movie. Between us, I think he is a terrible actor.” she confessed with a wink to the girls.

They chatted for a little while before the two girls leave to roam around the paddock, not without giving to Lyanna a big scrapbook for Charles that they didn’t have the time to give to him.

The weekend ended up with a double podium for Ferrari Charles getting P2 and saw Carlos’ win in his home race. It was a pretty emotional weekend for everyone but there was no time for them to recover as Austria was next.

Charles was pretty confident with the weekend and it was particularly relaxed that they entered the paddock ahead of qualifying. On their way to the hospitality they were both stopped by a journalist who wanted to get a few reactions from Charles.

“So Charles how do you feel about qualifying? And the weekend overall?”

“Pretty good, to be honest. We have the car and the performance and it’s a track where I always had good results. And I have my own personal lucky charm with me, so I’m not worried.”

Lyanna blushed and looked at him weirdly. It was the first time Charles was this open and public with their relationship. The journalist then looked at her.

“What it is like Lyanna, for you, to be there? How important it is?”

“It’s definitely an experience that I’ve never thought I would live that’s for sure. But there is something particularly impressive to watch Charles on track. I’m really proud of him.”

The journalist didn’t take up much more of their time and they both continue to walk to the garage.

“I’d almost said that watching you doing your job was particularly sexy. Thank God I stopped in time or the media team would have had damage control to do” she laughed.

“Sexy, uhm?” he whispered in her ear, her hand in his.

“Very sexy. This red racing suit does inexplicable things to my body.”

“I have a few minutes to spare, care to show me what it does to you?”

Charles ended up on pole right in front of Max. The Dutchman was the first one to congratulate him after the session as they were both headed out of the paddock. As Max started to talk to Charles and explained exactly what he thought went wrong in his performance and how he thought Charles was at the top of his form, Lyanna approached Kathryn, Max’s new girlfriend, after his split with Kelly a few months ago.

“Hey, I don’t think we’ve ever met, I’m Lyanna, Charles’s girlfriend.”

“Nice to meet you. It’s my first Grand Prix, I didn’t know what to expect… it feels a little bit overwhelming.”

“I know what you feel. It’s not easy to manage with two men who attract a lot of attention. But if you ever need a friend here, I’ll be happy to be your. I know a few people as well that would be glad to meet you.”

“Thank you Lyanna. It means a lot.”

And then, it was finally time for Silverstone. Charles had never been the luckiest there but he was feeling on a roll, accumulating podiums and wins and beginning to slightly distance Max in the championship even though he had to be careful since Red Bull first driver was not that far, a mistake from Charles’ end he could easily make a come back. But the stars seemed to be aligned for once for Charles and he finished the race first. He was on roll and Lyanna could see that it was slowly getting to his head and he was cockier than usual, something Lyanna didn’t like very much.

Since Silverstone was once again the same week than Wimbledon, Charles and Pierre were invited and brought Kika and Lyanna along. Lyanna loved tennis, a sport she practised when she was younger and it was the first time that she was attending a game. It was the semi-final Alcaraz-Medvedev, two players that Lyanna loved. She loved and enjoyed every second of it, stressing out for the players, gasping and burying her head into Charles shoulder during moments of tension. She knew that pictures would circulate but she didn’t care, she was comfortable enough in her relationship to not be bothered about what people would think.

After the game, Pierre asked if anyone would be tempted to play to which Lyanna agreed happily. First they decided to make Lyanna play against Charles and Kika against Pierre. Charles was pretty confident he would win and what a surprise it was when she crunched him, winning by far.

“It’s not fair! I had the sun in my eyes and couldn’t see the ball.”

“You are a sore loser. Admit it, I played well.”

“You made me run from one side of the court to the other all the time! I’ve played nice with you.”

“I’ve never asked for you to do that! Finally a sport that I’m better than you! I’m not going to let you live it down!”

“Are you guys up to play double? Let’s say Lya and I against you and Kika.” Charles turned to Pierre who was laughing at something Kika had said.

This time Charles won and it made him really happy.

“I had the best partner to win!” he bragged putting one loose arm around Lya’s shoulders.

“So now, I’m a good player and it was not only luck? Interesting.”

The group continued to laugh together as they later decided to roam around the streets in London, enjoying Lyanna’s comments as she was showing them her favourite places. They spent a few days in the English capital enjoying the little break before Hungary where Ferrari was bringing a huge upgrade package. Unfortunately it didn’t work as well as expected. despite a start P3, Charles had to DNF rather quicky in the race due to a mechanical problem with the engine. It was a frustrated Charles that Lyanna met in is driver’s room.

“Charles, it’s okay. It can happen…”

“It’s not okay, Lyanna! I was fine, I was ahead of Max in the championship, I didn’t have to worry about anything, just to secure a top 5 to get a little bit more of a comfortable advance. But this fucking DNF is making me do a huge step backward! The upgrades were supposed to give us more pace and regularity! Not the other way around!”

“I know that I can’t understand what you feel but…”

“No, you can’t! You don’t know what it is like and you’ll never know! You are just there, looking pretty and cheering me on but you’re not useful in that type of situation, Lyanna.”

“Okay, now you’re mean.”

“I’m not mean! I’m just stating the truth and if you can’t handle it then you are free to go. I don’t need your pity, I don’t need you to try to comfort me when we both know that you know nothing about motorsport and you know nothing about why is it so important for me to win and to win with Ferrari. I can’t offer any mistake, the team either.” he angrily said while throwing his cap towards the door, where Lyanna was standing.

She flinched but did not move. Charles needed to get rid of his frustration and if it had to be on her, then so be it. She knew he didn’t mean anything he said. She preferred seeing him like that all worked up than seeing him keep things to himself and pretend everything was fine.

“Mistakes happen, and you are great enough to bounce back. You did it in the past, you will again.”

“I need to feel that the team is 100% focus and behind me. I can’t DNF for an issue that could have been seen prior and already fixed.”

He sat down the couch and took his head in his hands, sighing. Lyanna didn’t move, letting him process his thoughts on his own.

“I’m sorry, Lya.” he said after a moment. “I didn’t want to snap at you like that, you are not responsible.”

“It’s okay. Sure it was not pleasant but I know you by now. You didn’t mean it.” she sat down beside him putting her hand on his back and tracing small circles. She could feel him relax a bit. “I’m proud of you, no matter what, even if I don’t always understand everything I can see all the hard work and all the love you put in the team. It will pay off. I’m sure of it.”

“I've always thought that I was good at handling the pressure. But there is so much at stake.”

Lyanna could see him slowly breaking down as he was explaining to her all the reasons why he felt insecure about the championship.

“Of course, there is the outside pressure with the media, the fans and all… Of course I want to win for you, for my family and for everyone that believed in me at some point in my life. But, I think… I should I phrase that? I feel guilty and it’s eating me whole.”

She listened to him in silence, letting him process his thoughts and phrase them the way he wanted.

“I’ve never told you that but one of the last things I told my dad before he passed away was that I had secured a seat in F1. It was a lie. I lied to my dad on his death bed, Lya. What kind of son does it makes me? My mom was so mad at me. But my dad… he was so happy. So, so happy. Bu there is a part of me that feels guilty ever since. As if I had betrayed him somehow. It’s stupid I know, especially considering that I did end up in F1 and I’m here in Ferrari and I know that from wherever he is, he is proud. But I think, in order to feel completely in peace with myself, I need to win. It’s more that just a title and a pretty trophy for me, Lya. It’s about making things right.”

“Oh, Charles… come here” she said as she was seeing a tear rolling down his cheek. “It’s not stupid. But you have to let go of the guilt and the pain and remember why you race in the first place, why it makes you so happy. Why are you putting you through all of this, Charles? You don’t need to tell me if you don’t want to but I just want you to think about it. I want you to step in the car happy and not guilty because you feel embodied by some sort of sacred mission. The trophy will be yours and yours only, not anyone else’s and certainly not ghosts’. You have to move forward and not let the past guide you. There are so many amazing things waiting for you.” “I know. You’re one of them. Thank you, I needed to hear that.”

==========================

author's note: Well... we are officialy three chapters away from the end. As usual, let me know your thoughts through the comments or ask box if your too shy. And don't forget to leave a like or reblog the story. It helps. And it lets me know that you like the story.

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[impalanna]

Title: You Found Me

Second Chapter

Warnings: Smut. Lots and lots of smut. Sex gifs. Cussing.

•••

I woke up to the sound of my alarm, set every morning for 7 am. I really need to turn that thing off, I don’t have to work my shit job anymore.

“Sweetheart, what’s - what’s goin’ on?” Dean rubs his eyes and looks at me, squinting from just waking up. He has the most confused, adorable look on his face and it makes me look at him and giggle. “You’re so cute, Dean.”

The sight in front of me was so gorgeous. I’ve been wanting this for a long time. You have no idea how much I have missed the man in front of me.

“Yeah, I missed you too.” He looks up at me with a guilty gaze. “I didn’t want to leave you.” He looks down at the part of the bed I was sleeping in.

Noticing the look on his face, I sit down in the spot he’s laying in and I tilt his jaw gently to face me. “You did what you had to. You’re here now and that’s what matters.” I kiss him slowly, my hands cupping his jaw.

“No, I mean I had no choice. I wouldn’t leave you, ever.” He had a look on his face, anger mixed with pain. “I- I just didn’t have a choice.”

“Tell me what happened.” I know he wouldn’t just leave, and I’ve been thinking about that since he picked me up from that dumb ass job. “I know you didn’t want to leave, so what made you?” This isn’t anger, it’s worry.

“I can’t talk about that right now.” His face was stern.

I leaned into him. I kissed him, then I whispered in his ear. “When you can, I’ll be here. I’m here now.”

Dean backed away to look at me. “Damn right you are.”

The look on his face was intense. His eyes were so green. His eyes always did that whenever he wanted to have sex with me. He didn’t take his eyes off me, he knew that I knew what he wanted.

“Dean, it’s been a while since I’ve done it.” I felt so stupid saying this to him. It made me feel so pathetic saying it out loud.

“How long, sweetheart?”

“Since, the night before you left. The sex we had that night. I haven’t done it with anyone else.” My cheeks were so red, I knew they were. I had to look like an idiot standing in front of him saying all this.

“What? Since, that was -“

“A long time ago, I know.” I finished his sentence.

“Sweetheart, that’s, that’s amazing.” He had a look on his face I’ve never seen before. He leaned in and kissed me gently, ending the kiss by biting my bottom lip. “You’re amazing.”

“Dean, I love you.” I couldn’t help it, it flew out of my mouth. I meant every word of it, but I know how he is with this kind of thing so I’ve never told him until now. It feels good and scary all at the same time, telling him.

“I know you do, sweetheart.” He kissed me again.

Dean crawls on top of me, I can feel his boner against my body. I couldn’t help but moan when I felt him on me like that. He whispers in my ear, “baby, I love it when you moan for me.” He grinds against my leg. “I wanna feel you.”

“Dean, please.” I begged him. I couldn’t help it.

Dean moved his hips at the sound of my voice, letting me feel how hard he is.

“Please, please Dean, I need it.” Dean smirked down at me. You want more, baby?” His voice is like honey.

“Yes, Dean please. Please fuck me. I need it so b -“ and the door slammed open. It was Sam.

I heard a low “fuck” in my right ear.

“Uh, damn - Wait, is that -?” Sam was so surprised.

“Hey, Sam.” Fuck. I did miss him too, but fuck. He always did have horrible timing.

“I’ll go, sorry -“ I can’t kick him out of his own room.

“You’re okay.” Dean gave me a stare that would kill me if it could. I bit my lip looking down at his red chest, sitting in my own wet.

“O -okay.” He looked so embarrassed.

“Sorry, Sammy.” Dean sounded so pissed.

“I’m sorry.” I whisper into Dean’s ear.

Sam walks into the bathroom to get ready for bed. I immediately get on top of Dean. I slide myself onto his hard and throbbing cock. His hands are on my hips, grabbing me hard, looking into my eyes like I cooked him a whole ass meal.

“Damn, your pussy is so tight. You feel so good.” His voice was shaky and on edge. I knew he was about to cum, so I slowed down and I rolled my hips, grabbing my boobs in front of him. “Dean, I’ve been needing this.”

I feel his nails dig into my sides. “Fuck, I missed this.”

I bite my lip when he says that. Something about him cussing during sex, it’s so hot. I roll my nipples between my fingers, moaning Dean’s name so loud I know Sam heard me, but I didn’t give a fuck.

“I’m about to cum.” I could feel it. I leaned down and I sucked on his neck. Whenever I knew he was about to explode in me, I leaned up so I could look at him. He squeezed my ass as I rolled my hips.

“Fuck, fuck” he is so so close. I am, too. But I always like to wait and cum with him. I can feel his skin on my clit, getting me closer and closer. I feel the grip on my ass tighten as hot juices fill me. “Dean, don’t stop I’m coming - DEAN!” I scream his name as I clench around him. My hips are rolling, and I slow down, my body almost twitching as I finish on him.

“That, that was beautiful.” Deans voice was breathy, his chest and neck covered in sweat. “You are beautiful.”

[xo-lesserafim]

FALLING FOR YOUR SMILE AND EYES

EPISODE 4. TGIF

authors note: Thank you to everyone who liked my post, since we made it to 50 likes<3. Anyways, enjoy episode 4

Bold: Korean

Italics: Over the phone

Both: Korean and over the phone

Back to masterlist

“Minho! I actually didnt think you would call Campus Police! Plus why didn’t you call it or on me?” I asked “Because I told you, I wouldn’t call it on you, I didn’t say I wouldn’t call it on Kitty.” Minho replied. “UGH! Now I’m gonna be the only girl, thanks a lot Minnie Mouse.” “Welcome pup.”

It was time for Literature, I was sitting by Kitty when she fell asleep. “Kitty! Wake up.” I whispered. “Huh? Did something happened.” “No, but are you okay?” “No, but I’ll tell you after class, promise.” “Alright.”

“So, what’s going on?” I asked. “My new roommate sucks, she’s always gaming, and I can’t sleep or study.” “Oh my, that sucks. let’s go talk with Professor Finnerty.” “Professor Finnerty?” Kitty asked.

“Hi Kitty and Andrea. What the problem?” He asked. “Please you have to help me” Kitty pleads. “I understand that the living situation may be a little bit difficult.” “Professor Finnerty, have you ever seen a Jenga Tower of pizza boxes? Have you ever smelled a Jenga tower of pizza boxes?” Kitty asked. “Actually-“ He says before he’s cut of. “You’re our resident advisor. Isn’t there anything you can do?” Kitty asked. “Sorry, Kitty, but the girls’ dorm is full.” “I can’t sleep. I can’t study. I can’t get the mozzarella out of the carpet. And I’m gonna fail all of my classes.” Kitty says. “There’s always the library. I believe you can make it work. You’ve already survived your first week of junior year.” The school bell rings. “ I’m here if you need me. And let’s look on the bright side. This whole living situation, it could be a lot worse.” “How?” Kitty asked. “Could be blue cheese.”

TIME SKIP: AFTER SCHOOL

As Kitty, Q, and I were watching a Korean film, “I dont know.” Kitty said. “It’s a lot of bulging eyes and rotting flesh.” I said. “Drea, what? This is a classic” Q said. “You know who you should be watching this with?” Kitty asked. “Florian.” We both said. “You guys are vibing!” “I don’t know. I mean, I’ve been with plenty of guys before… but I’ve never liked anyone this much. It’s making me nervous.” Q said. “I have an idea. What if we got a group together tomorrow for a binge party?” I said. “We can invite Florian, he’ll love and get hooked on the show, and you, and start watching more episodes, with fewer people, at night time.” Kitty said. “Just take it at one step at a time.” “Yea. Right. Like how you flew across the world for Dae without telling him.” Q said. “Hey, if I hadn’t, I wouldn’t have met you.” Kitty said. “Yea, same.” I said. “Plus we wouldn’t have discovered that we have a half-sibling somewhere in Korea.” “You got me there.” Q said. “ What sucks is that I can’t tell Dae anyone of this, because Yuri is always around. I miss my bestfriend.” Kitty said. “Excuse you?” I said jokingly. “After you, you’ll always be my bestfriend.” Kitty said. “Well, I might know one place Dae will be that Yuri definitely wont.” Q said. “Nature. That girl is not outdoorsy, and you guys are talking to the president of KISS’s outdoors club. First hike is tomorrow.”

“All right people, welcome to KISS’s outdoors club. First rule of Outdoor, please talk about Outdoors Club. That would be quite, no very helpful because we did lose a few members this summer. All right, let’s get started with some stretches.” Q said. I saw Dae come up to talk to Kitty, so I gave them space. Then Yuri came. How many more people are gonna magically come? Then I heard the one voice i never wanna hear. “All right, who’s ready to go on a hike?”

MINHO’S POV

“All right, who’s ready to go on a hike?” I asked. “Min Ho! What are you doing here?” Dae asked. “What!? I can’t hang out with my best friends?” I said. And I also happened to see Andrea. Those gorgeous golden-brown eyes are just so… Wait why an I thinking about her. “Min ho?” Andrea asked. “What?” “Why are even here? I thought Minnie Mouse doesn’t hike?” “Just shut up, Pup.” “Whatever.” “Make sure you guys stay hydrated. I hope you guys used the bathrooms because there are none.” Q said.

ANDREA(Y/N’s) POV

“Andrea.” Min ho said. “What?” “Stop for a second, your shoes are untied.” Minho ties my lace as he said that. “I could have perfectly tied themselves, but thank you.” I said running to catch up to Kitty. But the smirk he gave was so cute, wait… am I think about MIN HO? Gosh, someone help me. I was able to catch up to Kitty at-least. But she was in a race with Yuri. “KITTY WATCH UP.” I yelled. I have never ran as fast I as did, but I beat them somehow. “ I won, you guys both suck.” I said. When Kitty,Dae , and Yuri were up that, Kitty had taken a photo of Yuri and Dae. “Kitty! The baby bracelet has the same symbol as the one in the photo. Come on, let’s go!” I said as me and Kitty ran to the hospital.

As Kitty and I ran through the crowd of people to the hospital, we finally made it. “Hello.” The receptionist said.” “Hello. We’re looking for a information on somebody who was a patient here.” I said. “A current patient?” “No. In 1993.” “Sorry, all past records are strictly confidential.” “Okay, thank you.” I said bowing. “Kitty, all past records are strictly confidential.” I said whispering “Wait what? Really? Wait, I have a good idea.”

As we brought flowers to the maternity ward to cover our faces, Their was a women who had a pass to get into the record room. I had a great idea. “Excuse me ma’am. These flowers are from him.” I said. “Oh, my he likes me!” The women said. “Come on, Kitty.” I whispered. “Let’s go.”

As we sneaked into the records room, Kitty got to the computer, it was in korean. “Let it to me Kitty.” I said. “Found it!” I said. I searches up Eve Song. “Oh my gosh.” I said. “ We have a brother.” “Oh shoot the door opened. “Security!” A man said as security guards came running in. “Do we get a phone call?” Kitty said. Oh my gosh, Kitty.

When we got out, “Thank you so much for saving us at the hospital.” I said. “What were you guys even doing in there.” Professor Finnerty asked. “It’s a ling story.” Kitty said. “Well lucky I was there to sweet-talk the guards.” “Yes, but your Korean could work a bit.” I said. “And, your Korean was almost bad as mine.” Kitty said. “Hey, don’t judge. You’ve had a head start.” “A head start?” Kitty asked. “Well, one of your parents is Korean, right?” He asked. “Mine are both white.” “Really?” I asked. “Yeah, I’m adopted.” “Oh” Kitty said. “Cool.” “Yeah, it is pretty cool. I was adopted by some amazing people.” He said. “Have you every met your birth parents?” I asked. “No.” “ Are you curious? I feel like I would be curious .”I said. “ You certainly are very curious person.” “Have you always known you were adopted?” Kitty asked. “Uh, yeah. It was kind of obvious.” “Right. Duh.” Kitty said. “Do you ever see people on the street and think,like, “Oh my gosh, that person has the same shapes ears as me, maybe they’re my mom, or they could be my dad, or we could have the same ear shape?” I said. “We kinda do, huh.” “You ask a lot of questions, and I’m not an ear expert.” “Wait, Kitty, he was adopted my Australians.” I said. “Adopted by Australians. Twenty-nine-ish. When’s your birthday?” Kitty asked. “I think it’s gonna rain soon. Uh, we should hurry. I think the subway’s this way, Yup.” He said “Okay,” I said. “I think we found out who our half-brother could be.”

“Is Q here? I have 8 minutes until curfew.” Kitty said. “Yeah, in his room.” Okay, thanks, come on Drea.” Kitty said. “All right.” “Come in, “Q said. “And when were at the the hospital, look at we found.” I said as Kitty was showing him a photo. “Adopted by Australian parents, just like Professor Finnerty, and born around the same time.” Kitty said. “ He could totally be our half- brother.” I said. “Okay, what?” Q said. “ The facts add up.” Kitty said. “ I don’t you guys, This could be a huge coincidence. I mean, a lot it Korean Kids are adopted by Australians.” Q said. “But why else would he be at KISS? He probably looking for answers ” I said. “Answers we can find together as brother and sisters.” “Whoa. I think you need a little bit more bit evidence. I mean you guys will be dropping a lot of information on him, including the fact that his birth mom is, well not alive. “Yea, you may be right. But I just get the feeling that our mom kept the bracelet for a reason. I think she wanted to find the baby one day.” Kitty said.

As Min ho and Dae knocked on the door, “We need to show you something.” Dae said. “What?” I thought. “What?” Kitty said. “What the fuck is this?” I asked. “My roommate put on some weird website as I was sleeping?” Kitty said. “My gosh.” “I don’t see the appeal.” Min ho said. “Yea, totally as if you weren’t the one to call Campus Police.” I said in my head. “Yet, you found the site.” Q said. “Kitty, you should move.” Dae said. “You can’t live with that girl anymore.” “ Yea, I kind of agree with Dae. This is kind of sketchy.” Q said. “ I tries to move, but there are no other rooms available.” Kitty said. “Uhh, how about a hotel? My driver could take you right now,” Min ho said. “Cant afford that for an entire semester.” Kitty said. “I sure Dae could hook you up with a discount at Hans Hotel.” Min ho said. “Shut up Min ho.” Kitty said. “Move back in with us!” I said. “What! No, I called Campus Police for a reason.” Min ho said. “Whatever.” I replied. “Yea that could work.” Dae and Q said. “She can bunk with Drea and I, and Dae and Min ho will bunk.” Q said. “Yea!” I said. “Let the moving begin tomorrow!”

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Copyrights © 2023 xo-lesserafim. All rights reserved. I do not own XO, Kitty , Netflix does. do not copy, translate, or repost anything without my permission.

[legitalicat]

Player 3 Found (mixed media au) - part 6, Jace 1

AN: omg I finally got this part done! Thank you all for the love so far, and I hope you enjoy!!

Series masterlist here!

Summary: Jace and YN are on a call, and everything feels right.

CW: Language, slightly sexually charged, fluff

Pairings: Jacaerys Velaryon x reader, mentions of Aemond Targaryen x reader

Word Count: 565

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You felt insane. Truly.

You had agreed to be in a relationship with two people at once, ones you barely knew. It felt like the greatest way to say fuck you to Erik. He had you entirely, and he didn’t want you. Now two men, gorgeous men, wanted to do nothing but make you happy. Wouldn’t you be a fool to deny this?

“You’re so pretty when you’re thinking,” Jace commented.

You felt the heat flood your cheeks. You had been on a call for a few hours at this point. It was as easy talking to him as it was Aemond. And he was just as willing to compliment you all day if you would let him.

“You’re too sweet,” you said to him.

You were laying in your bed, only the light from your call to illuminate your face. He was gaming to wind down from his earlier gig, so there was plenty of light on his end. You just enjoyed watching him.

“You wanna talk about it?” he asked you.

“I just. The last guy I dated was sooo fucked. I just thought he was better than that,” you said.

You didn’t really know how to talk about Erik. It felt so fresh to you. You always thought of it as being recent but it had been near three months since he moved out. He had been the person you planned on marrying and spending the rest of your life with. But, you figured if he could move on while you two were together you could move on now.

“He’s an idiot,” Jace told you.

“Or maybe I am,” you muttered.

“Princess, don’t think that,” he said quickly, firmly, leaving little room for argument. You watched as he paused his game without a second thought and turned his attention fully to you.

“It’s not like he wasn’t obvious with what he was doing, Jace. Looking back, it was slap in the face obvious,” you told him.

“They say love is blind. And you want to see the best in people, anyone can see that. You’re not an idiot for trusting the person you loved.”

He gave you the kind of look that left little room for doubt in your mind. He spoke so certainly about everything, confidence seeping out of him from every pore. It was, in a lot of ways, incredibly sexy to you.

“When we get to King’s Landing, I’m gonna kiss you so hard,” he said casually as he turned back to his game.

“Oh?” you asked.

“Mhmm,” he said, nodding. “I mean, at least I’ll start there. And I’ll give you more and more until you’re on your knees begging.”

You couldn’t help but bite your lip. He glanced over at you, smirking a bit and chuckling. He truly didn’t understand how you of all people could get so flustered so easily. You were gorgeous, smart, funny, and guys constantly hit on you and asked you out. How you could still be so easily embarrassed was something he already adored about you.

“You get some sleep, Princess. I’ll be here when you wake up,” he told you, smiling at you.

“Don’t hang up,” you said quickly. “Just. Just say on call, yeah?”

He nodded, once again smiling, and settled into his chair. You watched him silently until sleep overtook you, dreams of him blessing you through the night.

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Taglist: @zaldritzosrose @lady-phasma @fan-goddess @shari-berri @thenameswinter99 @paigeestrawfordd

@abecerra611

(if you wish to be tagged let me know!)

[hearthotchner]

for @my-mummy-dust

Another blurb request: the reader tiredly cuddling (basically falling asleep on Aaron) on the plane back home from a case and then maybe quite possibly when she wakes up Aaron is tucking her into her bed and she wakes up and asks him to stay with her bc she’s scared? Idk smith like that

tw; implications of sexual assault (non-consensual touching)

no matter what you did, you couldn’t get it out of your head. how his fingers dug so far into you, that they left deep crescent marks. how his hands roamed your body, gripping onto whatever part of you he could. the way he pulled you into his disgusting, sweaty chest, and calling you a “pretty little thing.”

which is why you had barely slept the night at the hotel, after the case. finding one way or another to busy yourself: watching a movie, catching up on paperwork, taking a shower — you scrubbed so hard, your skin turned red, yet you still felt filthy, still felt his vice-like hands all over you.

when it was time to get to the airstrip, you felt a sense of relief wash over you; maybe, the trained agents around you would bring some comfort.

they didn’t.

your eyelids felt so heavy, they’d constantly be closing; you only got a few seconds in, though. when his gravelly voice would begin to echo in your head, the feeling of fingers ghosted over the bruises he left, they’d snap open.

eventually, you gave up, leaving your seat to make a coffee — not noticing the second set of footsteps, following closely behind you.

a heavy hand took its place on your shoulder, “hey.”

you jumped at his sudden appearance, “hotch!”

“are you okay?” he asked, brows creased with worry.

“yeah.. i’m fine. i just, haven’t been sleeping properly.” it was half the truth, but you couldn’t say anything else. you didn’t want aaron to think you were weak, he’s been dealing with stuff worse than this for years. what would he think if you got emotional over one case? he’d probably demote you.

“alright, well, you wouldn’t mind me sitting with you, then? i’m working and i don’t wanna wake anyone else.” he was always so gentle with you, soft-spoken, you didn’t think someone like him could have a voice like that.

“not at all,” you smiled, but it didn’t quite reach your eyes.

“you know, if you’re having trouble sleeping, that’s not gonna help.” he informed, motioning toward your coffee cup. “i think there’s some chamomile tea, around here. go sit down, i’ll make you some.”

“hotch, you don’t have to.”

“but i want to. go sit down, sweetheart.” the pet name that fell from his lips, filled your stomach with little butterflies, and caused a blush to rise up your cheeks. you turned and left without an argument, after that, so he wouldn’t see the affect his words had on you.

resting your head against the window, you thought about your boss. the rest of the team always made comments about how he had a soft-spot for you, and how he’d do things for you, that he wouldn’t do for anyone else.

obviously that wasn’t true in the slightest, aaron was just a caring person in general, always looking out for everyone, especially his team.

he sighed sitting down, but gave you a quick smile,“here.”

the scent of sandalwood, with some citrus, filled the air around you — it smelled good, comforting.

“thanks,” you looked over, noticing he hadn’t brought any of his files with him, “aren’t you gonna get your stuff?”

“no, i figured i’d leave it. there’s more important things.” he turned to face you, eyes filled with worry bore into yours “are you sure you’re alright?” you nodded, wishing you could kiss away the frown etched onto his face. “i’m here if you need anything, okay?”

“okay, thanks hotch.” your voice nothing but a whisper.

you didn’t know if was the smell of his cologne, or hotch himself, that was lulling you to sleep, but you finally got to rest your eyes; neither did you know, when the wall you were laying on became so soft, firm, but soft. though, you didn’t dwell on it too much, when you slipped into the dream world, free from the events of the last few days.

—

it was a sight to see, for the bau team: their unit chief, and colleague, who swears to not have a crush on him, cuddled up together on the jet, asleep. all the frown lines, that were thought to be engraved on aaron hotchner’s face, seemed to disappear.

they made sure to send pictures to their favourite tech analyst, for safe keeping, of course.

—

“(y/n).. (y/n), wake up.” you woke up to him, gently shaking your shoulder.

“hm?”

“i’m sorry,” he whispered, “this is my third time waking you, but we have to go upstairs, to my apartment.” you murmured something in agreement, got out the car and followed him.

his apartment?

“hotch?” he hummed, in acknowledgment, his focus shifting from the ascending numbers on the lift to you, “why are we going to your apartment?” you tiredly asked, eyes still heavy with sleep.

“i figured it’d be easier to let you sleep here. i didn’t want you driving yourself home when you’re this tired, and i could give you a lift in the morning too.” he offered, “i hope that’s okay. i can take you home, if you really want. i thought the extra hour of sleep would help.”

what a gentleman, you thought to yourself. “no, it’s fine. thanks again, hotch, it means a lot.”

he was so sweet. you didn’t think it was possible to fall harder for him than you already did, before today; he always seemed to prove you wrong.

how couldn’t you fall for someone like aaron? it was inevitable.

—

pulling the covers over you, he said, “there’s an extra blanket at the foot of the bed, if it gets too cold. and, if you need anything else, let me know, okay? i’ll be in the living room.”

you insisted that you took the couch, he’d done enough for you already, but he wouldn’t accept: telling you he’d gotten enough sleep on the plane, and that he wouldn’t need anymore.

when the door clicked shut, you were left alone again, with nothing other than your thoughts, and the dark.

you tossed, and turned, not being able to calm yourself to sleep. whenever you closed your eyes, you wound up being there, with his hands all over you again.

your eyes were trained on the door, fearing that he’d burst through any minute — even though you knew he never would.

you slipped out from under the covers, and hesitantly made your way to the living room.

aaron was laying there, staring up at the ceiling, lost in his own thoughts, until a small voice filled the silence,“hotch?”

he sat up, and was met with glossy eyes, “yeah?”

“can- could you stay with me for a bit?” wiping your cheek, you continued, voice beginning to shake, “i don’t want to be alone right now.. please?” and when your voice cracked, his heart broke.

almost immediately, he got up, “yeah, okay. let’s go.” he spoke quietly, leading you back to his bedroom.

—

again, he pulled the covers over both of you, and let you cuddle into his chest, “when you’re ready to talk about it, i’ll be here to listen.” he spoke softly, covering your hand with his larger one.

“goodnight hotch.” you mumbled, eyes already closing.

“you can call me aaron,” he began to rub the back of your hand with his thumb.

“goodnight aaron.”

“sweet dreams, (y/n).” he whispered.

[kellanved-ammanas]

TF2 Drabbles Demo & Scout - Medic's Making a Frankenstein

Summary: Scout wakes Demo to share news on Medic's latest medical atrocity.

[A/N] Special Halloween drabble, yay!

~

A frantic knocking jerked Demo out of sleep. It sounded urgent, clearly it was important. He stumbled out of the bed to answer it.

It was Scout. “Medic’s making a Frankenstein.” Never one to mumble, his words were perfectly audible if spoken a bit fast and yet… Demo had no idea what he meant. It was too early in the morning and he was too hungover for whatever this was.

“What?”

“Medic’s making a Frankenstein,” Scout repeated, speaking slower this time.

“He’s making a…” Demo cut himself off as it finally clicked. Of course Scout would make that mistake. “You mean he’s making a guy outta corpses?”

“Yeah, a Frankenstein! And it’s important because what if it does what Frankensteins do and goes on a rampage? Not that I’m like scared of it or nothing but it’s Medic so he’s probably gonna buff it. What if he gives it like permanent uber or something so we can’t kill it? So I was gonna destroy it before it’s even finished but Medic caught me and kicked me out. But with two people one us could distract him while the other destroys the Frankenstein. And you’re the best guy here at destroying shit. So that’s the plan; I give the doc the run around while you blow up the Frankenstein before it becomes a real threat.”

Demo barely held back a groan as he lifted a hand to pinch the bridge of his nose. He hadn’t had as much to drink last night as he could’ve had, resulting in his hangover being relatively light as far as hangovers went. But that didn’t mean he wanted to be woken up at the asscrack of dawn for this bullshit.

“First off laddie, why the bloody hell you gotta wake me up for this? Medic’s always doing weird shit with corpses, this ain’t nothing new. It easily could’ve waited. Second, Frankenstein is the doctor’s name so if anything Medic’s doing a Frankenstein, not making one.”

“Nah, his name’s Ludwig, isn’t it?”

“I meant Frankenstein’s the doctor that made the corpse monster. It doesn’t have a name… I think.” Demo had read the book but that had been a while ago and he’d since had more black out drunk episodes than he cared to count so his recall of its specifics was spotty at best.

“Whatever. All that doesn’t matter. What matters is I don’t wanna face the possibility of an ubered Frankenstein. You know what I mean? So you down to cooperate or not? I’ll go ask Pyro if you aren’t ‘cause he’ll probably be happy to burn the thing to the ground.”

Demo could try to correct him again about the monster’s name and/or about how said monster actually wasn’t prone towards violence – though admittedly in a real life scenario and with Medic at the helm, such wasn’t out of the question – but he was just too dang tired. Correcting Scout on anything almost always took more effort than it was worth. And destroying it before it as finished just in case might be wise but… if anyone could pull off such a feat, it was Medic and Demo wouldn’t mind seeing it.

“How ‘bout instead we just make Medic promise not to uber it or whatever? ‘Cause if we destroy it he’s gonna be right bloody pissed at us and that’s scarier than any ubered monster.”

Scout grimaced. “I guess that’s true. But still, I don’t like it. I watched that movie when I was kid and… and nothing ‘cause I ain’t scared of nothing. Not even Medic when he’s mad. I just think blowing it up would be funny.”

If the pounding in Demo’s skull wasn’t starting to grow more insistent with every moment the bright hall light pierced his eye, he would’ve poked at Scout for more. Scared of Frankenstein’s monster was not what he would’ve expected from him. It was kind of cute; loud brash hired killer was frightened of misunderstood fictional monster. He must’ve been real young when he’d watched that movie, perhaps something do to with being the youngest of however many brothers he had.

“Look, here’s the deal lad, I’m gonna head back to bed. We’ll chat with Medic ‘bout making sure he contains his monster properly later, ‘kay? And if he refuses, we’ll blow it up.”

Scout glared at him at him for a couple seconds before rolling his eyes. “Fine. Long as we do it before he ubers it.”

“Yeah, yeah. Soon as I wake up properly, promise.” More like after he’d had at least a coffee if not breakfast but close enough.

“Got it. I’ll keep an eye on it in the meantime.”

Demo shut the door with a relieved sigh, shutting out the wretched light. In payback for being woken so early he was going to tell everyone Scout was scared of Frankenstein’s monster. … Or maybe he’d be merciful and keep it a secret. He’d decide when he woke up. For now, he just crawled back into his bed.

[another-dr-another]

testify before koba?

Maeda, narrating - I don’t want to detract if Kobashikawa wants to say what happened…

Maeda - …But he really doesn’t seem like he’s ready to go under the spotlight like that.

Maeda - It’s fine. I can take the heat for not remembering what I heard.

Maeda - I have to bring it up eventually anyways.

~*~

Kobashikawa - I don’t wear a watch, so I’m not sure what the exact timeline was- my guess would be… somewhere around midnight.

Maeda - Ōtori wears a watch though. Maybe he can verify what time it was?

Maki - Ōtori was involved?

Maeda - Mhm. Kobashikawa, Ōtori, and Tsurugi all woke up briefly last night. Kobashikawa told me after I reminded him, and I verified the story with Tsurugi.

Maeda - Tsurugi and Ōtori both witnessed what caused Kobashikawa to wake up last night. 

Maeda - …Personally, I don’t think it’s our number one priority right now. I’m a third party, I can promise you, it doesn’t seem connected.

Maeda - We can discuss it later, but…

Maeda - …

//He sighs.

Maeda - Honestly, I… I have my own testimony I wanna share. It’s… I forgot about it, because it happened so late… I was really practically asleep-

Maeda - But- I think it’s really important.

Ōtori - …Wait, what’s happening?

Tsurugi - …You witnessed something last night, Maeda?

Maeda - Yeah. Yeah, yeah- I’m so sorry. Really, I completely forgot- I only remembered when I was talking with Taira, just before the trial started.

Maeda - But… better late than never, right? 

Tsurugi - …Yeah.

Tsurugi - No, yeah- no- that’s fine, Maeda- that’s good!

Tsurugi - You’re completely right. It’s good to get whatever information you have! Um- that’s good to share.

Tomori - …

Tsurugi - …So. What happened last night?

Maeda - …Right.

Maeda - I really didn’t prepare what I was going to say… I’m nervous I’ll screw this up.

//Everyone is looking at Maeda. Taira is the most lax, the only one aware of what Maeda knows. Kobashikawa seems more confused, curious about what Maeda’s planning to do here, and Tomori is simply staring straight at him. He fixes his posture.

Maeda - A-Again… I only remembered this earlier today, just before the trial started. I’ve been trying to remember more clearly… but I was mostly asleep- if I wasn’t, I would have done something.

Hatano - “Done something”?

Maeda - …

Maeda - I think I overheard the murder.

Maeda - L-Last night- I didn’t hear anyone’s… dying screams, or anything- but I heard the conversations that led up to it, I think.

Hatano - …

Tsurugi - …

Taira - …

Maeda - …Uhm.

Maeda - Okay. The first thing I heard was-

Ōtori - No, let’s wait for a moment.

Ōtori - Maeda, you overheard the murder?

Maeda - …Told you it was important-

Maki - Maeda.

Maeda - And I said I forgot!

Maeda - Seriously, I was asleep! I just wanted the- the noises and the lights to stop!

Uehara - …Lights?

Tomori - If lights had come on, wouldn’t we have all woken up…?

Maeda - Mm- it wasn’t the lights of the room, it was something else.

Taira - It’s always possible that Maeda was dreaming.

Maeda - Taira…

Tsurugi - Hold up, I’m with Maeda here.

Tsurugi - Stress can make people forget things.

Maeda - …

Tsurugi - It’s good that Maeda has more information for us. Even if the testimony gets thrown out, it gives us something to think about.

Tsurugi - Plus, dreams can be affected by what we hear while we sleep… everyone should listen to Maeda’s testimony, then we can figure out what we think.

Maeda - I don’t think it was a dream… but I’m glad Tsurugi’s on my side.

Maeda - Thank you…

Maeda - I don’t know when exactly this happened, but I think I’ve worked out the order, and as much detail as I can get.

Maeda - First, something moved in front of me, and then I heard a person talking. I 

Maeda - I don’t remember details about the voice, because it was quiet, and sounded… a bit rough? Not like a deep voice, though- like how sleep makes you sound. 

Maeda - They were talking with someone else, but I don’t remember what they were saying.

Maeda - The person I did hear, though, said… I think it was something about the time? Or- the length of something?

Maeda - Uhm- they gave the other person permission to go… do something.

Maki - …What did you hear.

Maeda - “Wait, how long… Jesus, okay, no, don’t worry, go ahead.”

Maeda - I’m omitting a little bit, but that’s because I don’t remember too well.

Maeda - Sometime later, I heard… it must have been a door opening, because I remember there being a light- I kept my eyes shut, but still, you can tell if there’s light or not with your eyes closed.

Maeda - I tried to open my eyes, but I couldn’t really, because I’d been asleep. I think someone was in the doorframe, though.

Maeda - I didn’t think anything much of it- I thought it was weird, but… the fact I was tired kinda outweighed anything else, so tried to fall back asleep.

Maeda - It got bright again, I think from the door re-opening, and then all the lights went away, and I was able to fall back asleep.

Maki - All of the lights?

Maeda - Tsurugi’s lights were still on, I meant the ones coming from the door.

//Maki nods.

Maeda - Okay. I missed a lot of this next part, I think, but…

Maeda - …

Maeda - I heard someone say… I don’t know, something about the conversation they were having, the part I missed-

Maeda - And then- “Oh my God. Did you just kill somebody?”

Maeda - Then the other person came in, and they said they didn’t know what the first person was talking about, and then they started to fight.

Maeda - I couldn’t make anything out- they were talking over each other, and I just remember being upset, because I was tired, and wanted to sleep.

Maeda - But…

Maeda - But, thenI heard a thump. And all the noise stopped.

Maeda - Someone… god, I don’t remember, because it was just as I was falling asleep, but- I heard… a cry? Sort of… like, a whine, but not how a person can whine or moan about something but-

Maeda - Like an animal that wants something, or got upset with you. Kinda heard a sniffle, maybe.

Maeda - So, then I fell back asleep, but I got woken up again- for the third time, I think?

Maeda - I heard sobbing, and there was more noises from… I think from where I heard the voices coming from. 

Maeda - There was a bit of light- it was brighter, but… there was somehow less of it than when the door got opened the first time. 

Maeda - I started wondering… I think about going back to my dorm to sleep, but there was some sort of… it wasn’t white noise, but it was like white noise, and that was kinda soothing.

Maeda - There was another sound too, and then the light got brighter for a moment, then dimmed back down- it happened in that order. White noise, something else under it, and the light changed again.

Maeda - It was really frustrating when the light got bright, so… I think I rolled over to try and avoid it. 

Maeda - Maybe if I’d let it wake me up, we wouldn’t be here right now.

Maeda - The noises kept going, but I was starting to fall back asleep, so… I don’t know what happened.

Maeda - Then, there was just white noise, and I remember because I thought maybe everything would go away-

Maeda - But then there were sounds again, and I remember… thinking that someone was talking, but I didn’t know where, or what they were saying.

Maeda - Uhm… I don’t really know. Then the white noise went away, and the light shut off, and…

Maeda - I don’t know. There were a few, small noises? But… I fell asleep. 

Maeda - Hopefully, that means nothing else happened.

Maeda - …That’s all.

Ōtori - …

Uehara - …

Tomori - …

Maki - …Okay.

Maki - …Jesus. Okay. Okay.

Maki - I-...

Maki - I’m really glad you remembered hearing that.

Maeda - Yeah. I am too…

Ōtori - …I think I’m confused.

Ōtori - It’s- There were a lot of noises and lights at the end there.

Maeda - Yeah… it was hard to put everything into the right order, but… that should be it.

Ōtori - God…

Kobashikawa - …

//He holds up his whiteboard. 

Kobashikawa - There was the first two conversations, the second one ending with a thump, and crying.

Kobashikawa - Sobbing, a sound from the area of the voices, and light.

Kobashikawa - Something like white noise, which was covering up other sounds, and the light got brighter, then dimmed again.

Kobashikawa - The noises stayed the same for a bit, nothing changed- then the noises under the white noise went away, so it was only white noise.

Kobashikawa - The sounds came back, and it seemed like people were talking. After that, all the noise stopped, and the lights went away.

Kobashikawa - Maeda heard a few quiet sounds, but nothing distinct, and he fell back asleep.

Ōtori - …Succinct. Nice.

Tomori - …

Tomori - Maeda, you said you didn’t see anything, right?

Maeda - No… I just wanted to sleep, I wasn’t really thinking.

Tomori - Ah…

Tomori - That’s understandable, of course!

Maki - …It isn’t a lot to go off of, though.

Maeda - …Huh?

Uehara - M…most of that feels important… right? Huh…

Maki - I meant the lights and the sounds.

Maki - It’s proof there was something happening, but if all we know is that… well, that something happened, it’s no further than we were before.

Maeda - W-Wait-

Maeda - I feel like what I heard should definitely be relevant?

Maki - And it is.

Maki - The confusing part just isn’t the priority right now. It’s good Kobashikawa was able to sum it up, but I’m more concerned about what happened before it.

Maeda - The argument.

Tomori - Y-You mean…

Ōtori - …

Ōtori - Odds are, that was Higa, and whoever killed him, right?

Maki - Right. That’s what makes sense.

Maki - But, if we assume that, then we can figure Higa died shortly after. If he seriously thought someone had committed murder, he’d probably have woken everyone up.

Maki - …

Maki - …

Maki - Which makes what Maeda said really important.

Maki - Higa died shortly after the argument, but it was well after all the noises and lights that Maeda heard talking with the white noise.

Maki - It’s possible that someone woke up, and randomly had a conversation with someone.

Maki - But the odds of that are wayyy lower than the odds that one of the members of that conversation was the blackened.

Maki - So, that begs the next question.

Maki - Who remembers having a late night conversation last night, and who were you talking with.

Maeda - …

Taira - …

Tomori - …Oh my god.

Tomori - Wait. Wait-

Tomori - Couldn’t the blackened have been talking to themself?

Tomori - We-We know there wasn’t a murder before Higa’s last night, they probably weren’t expecting him to accuse them of that-

Tomori - Maybe- maybe he didn’t wake anyone up because Higa attacked them!

Tomori - So they’d have been caught by surprise, right? They wouldn’t have been planning to kill someone… 

Tomori - So once it happened, they talked to themselves.

Maki - …

Maki - Yeah, that could be it.

Maki - I won’t act like there’s only the one possibility. But whatever happened last night was enough to wake Maeda, it could’ve woken up other people too.

Maki - And for the noises to keep happening, and the blackened to keep talking to themselves for the entire time Maeda described…

Hatano - But the talking was only at the end. If it was talking beforehand, why would Maeda only be able to tell halfway through, when he was closer to being asleep?

Maki - …

Maki - God.

Maki - Did anyone hear anything, or have any conversations last night?

Kobashikawa - …We haven’t discussed the first conversation…

Ōtori - No one thinks it’s connected, right?

Maeda - Ah- I don’t think Kobashikawa’s erased the notes off of his white board- Ōtori is translating for him again.

Ōtori - I mean, to better paint the picture of what happened, last night, sure-

Ōtori - But it seems like we’re operating under the view that Higa died after falsely accusing someone of murder.

Ōtori - Since we know no one did anything prior to Higa’s death, it’s- well, similar to earlier. It just isn’t the priority right now.

Kobashikawa - …Okay.

Ōtori - Okay?

Kobashikawa - …

//Kobashikawa nods.

Maki - …I agree. I think the thing that’d help us the most is working out what happened with the argument, and with the noises Maeda heard after.

Tomori - Mm…

Tomori - There’s nothing saying someone couldn’t have gone to the bathroom, and that’s what some of the sounds were?

Tomori - It’d explain the lights…

Maki - But not the voices.

Tomori - Ah…

Ōtori - …

Ōtori - Tomori, are you alright?

Tomori - M-Mm?

Ōtori - …

Taira - …I’m sure you heard what he asked.

Tomori - Ah… yeah, I’m fine.

Tomori - Sorry.

Tomori - …I just-

Tomori - …

Maeda - …What is it?

Tomori - …I think… it’s feeling a bit too real now.

Tomori - I- I don’t like it. I don’t like thinking about the fact that was all happening right by my head, and I didn’t know.

Tomori - I’m sorry, though. I’ll compose myself.

Taira - …

Maki - …It’s alright, Tomori.

Ōtori - …

Ōtori - It’s a weird feeling, the moment things dawn on you. Like how you said it, when things start to feel real… it’s difficult.

Ōtori - …

Maeda - …Is he done talking?

Tomori - …Thank you.

Kobashikawa - …

Hatano - Okay.

Hatano - So, Higa got mad at someone, and he died about it. What else have we worked out?

Maki - …

Maki - God. That’s effectively it-

Maki - …

Maeda - …Maki, what’s up?

Maki - …Uh.

Maki - From here, it might just be extrapolation-

Maki - Tsurugi, Higa seems to have gotten into a fight last night. Are you sure you didn’t hear anything?

Tsurugi - No hearing aid while sleeping. 

Maki - …Okay. That makes sense.

Tsurugi - Yeah…

Tsurugi - We’ve established motive, but that’s it.

Uehara - …Wait, what’s the motive?

Tsurugi - Higa was being a dick again.

Maeda - …!

Uehara - Ah. Tracks.

Tsurugi - Mhm…

Tomori - …

//Maeda watches as Tsurugi looks over at Tomori. She doesn’t say anything.

Tsurugi - …

Tsurugi - It definitely checks out.

Tsurugi - Someone was just… hanging around, and Higa gave them hell over it. It’s sad to say, and it was always sad to see, but that’s how it always was.

Tsurugi, quietly - …I don’t like it. I was really hoping he’d be able to get better.

Tsurugi - But…

Tsurugi - I won’t say that I wasn’t expecting things to catch up to him.

Tsurugi - In fact, odds are it wasn’t even the murder accusation, or Higa attacking them, or whatever.

Tsurugi - Maybe it was just… well, maybe it started as something else, as someone trying to get him to go away, but…

Tsurugi - Higa was the way he was because of things that happened to him, things that hurt him, taught him that was how he stayed safe.

Tsurugi - And Higa hurt other people, made it so they weren’t safe…

Tsurugi - …People don’t do well when they feel like that. And he stood alone as the… reachable source of fear and pain.

Tsurugi - …

Tsurugi - I don’t know.

Tsurugi - Maybe they didn’t even mean to kill him. Maybe… maybe they just meant for him to stop. 

Tsurugi - …Anyways. It shouldn’t be surprising to anyone. In fact, it’s pretty simple- I’m surprised we didn’t land on this for the motive sooner. 

Tsurugi - Higa got what he had coming. Even in the end, it looks like it was his fault.

Maeda - …

Maeda - Hearing it… summed up like that…

Taira - …Is it? Simple, I mean.

Tsurugi - Well, it is- but I was wrong to say that. You can get a lot of motives easily if you’re creative.

Tsurugi - More important is that this one checks out. It’s what makes the most sense when you look at the situation Higa died in- it’s most probable.

Tsurugi - It was the result of a fight- this death wasn’t premeditated. Uhm- second degree, not first.

Tsurugi - Anyways. Deciding to kill someone while everyone’s in the same room, and choosing a method that takes time- one that necessitates killing an athlete with your bare hands…

Tsurugi - …It can’t be premeditated. No one would choose that as their plan, even if we thought Higa died from someone wanting him dead.

Tsurugi - You can’t even make the argument that everyone would have the same alibi in this situation, because while it’s true that that works in your favor, there’s lower-risk situations that run the same, 

Tsurugi - And the matter of the murder method stays the same. It’s risky, which can mean there was a lot of planning and preparation, to try and negate risks, or there was none, and it happened on the fly.

Tsurugi - With the argument, we know it was the latter.

Tsurugi - …Right?

Maeda - …

Taira - …

Maki - That…

Maki - That… should all track, yeah.

Maki - I- Tsurugi, it’s fine if you can’t answer this. Have you ever seen a case like this one?

Tsurugi - Oh. 

Tsurugi - One time, I saw a star go pop, and there was new colors inside? Uhm. But, I don’t know if that’s…

Maki - Okay. That’s- okay.

Maki - …Well- does anyone disagree with Tsurugi’s explanations?

Maeda - It makes sense to me…

//No one speaks up.

Tomori - …We have our motive, then. 

Kobashikawa - …

Maeda - Oh- back to the whiteboard.

Kobashikawa - But, not a suspect.

Tomori - …Yeah…

Maki - Mhm…

Maki - This was good though. This is good.

Maki - Before Maeda gave his testimony, we didn’t have any clue what happened. We know now though that Higa and… probably the blackened had an encounter last night.

Maki - …Irregardless of the exact order of events, it’s good to have some stuff ruled out- like the idea of it being premeditated.

Ōtori - Right- but where should we go from here?

Taira - There are a few things we could discuss.

Taira - While we seem to be in agreement on what it was, we could discuss the cause of Higa’s death a bit more.

Taira - There’s also the time of death, and we could expand on what Maeda thinks he heard last night.

Taira - Each of these subjects could be examined more thoroughly, I believe.

Ōtori - …

Maki - …Okay. Sure, yeah-

Maki - Does anyone have anything they want to bring up, though?

Kobashikawa - …

Tomori - …

Maki - …Alright. 

~*~

Maeda, narrating - Maki is facilitating a lot of this… I feel sort of bad. 

Maeda - Maybe I should help pick the direction we go in. 

Multiple Choice!

{Debate the Cause of Death}

{Debate the Time of Death}

{Go Back to Debating the Noises}

[garbinge]

When Summer Ends (4)

Topper Thornton x Maybank!Sister OC Nicky Maybank From these August Prompts:  “Necessary Theft"

Summary: Nicky Maybank, JJ’s older sister, just graduated.  Her summer break was supposed to be normal. Work, party, chill. But then she somehow Topper came into the mix. Fun little summer romance fic with the twist of a pogue navigating a relationship with a kook.  

A/N: A little update for my favs.

TW: All my fics are 18+. Cursing, angsty. 

Chapter Index

Word Count: 1.6k

Taglist: @drabbles-mc​ (Let me know if you’d like to be added to the taglist!)

Nicky woke up to the sound of water splashing, her eyes opened wide from the noise when she realized she was in the hammock at the chateau. Her memories of the night prior filled her head. She was out with Topper, like she had been for the past few nights. The two of them mainly spent their time more south than the cut, away from prying curious eyes of Kildare. Occupying parks, beaches, sometimes they even just stayed parked in Topper’s car and talking, laughing…making out for hours. That didn’t stop her from her usual shenanigans with the Pogues, while she was around a lot less, she tried to keep up her appearances to avoid anyone saying anything. And if they did, she’d say she worked late, was spending time with friends from her grade that even though each Pogue knew, they wouldn’t ever run into them let alone ask if it was true. 

As she came to it she saw John B on the dock tying the HMS Pogue to the boards, likely what the splashing was that woke her up. The fire pit was ashing out, just small embers pulsing as the low breeze killed any hopes of it picking back up. The empty beer bottles and silence outside of the docking boat let Nicky know she was the last one here, it wasn’t that it was unlike her to sleep at The Chateau but lately she was very aware and preservative of her time. Her hands searched for her phone in the hammock and found it. 2%. It was enough for her to check the time and her messages. 

9:54AM

Topper 7:14AM:

You still wanna go take the boat out today? 

She quickly responded back with the little battery she had. 

Nicky 9:55AM:

Yea, sorry I was asleep. Wanna go in the late afternoon? Sunset ride? 

After hitting send, she crawled out of the hammock and placed her phone in the back of her jean short pocket. John B was making his way up the dock to the yard. 

“Sorry to wake you!” He chuckled. 

Nicky stood in the yard, hand on her hip and other hand shielding her eyes from the sun. “I’m sure you owed me a wake up call!” 

John B laughed at that. “That’s true, you normally are the early bird Maybank.” 

“Speaking of Maybanks, JJ went home?” She looked around at John B approached. 

“Uh,” John B paused to think of what to say. “Yea, I think, he left here kind of early.” 

“Freaky Friday.” Nicky smiled oblivious to John B being on edge. “Alright, I’ll catch ya later.” She threw up the peace sign and turned to grab one of the many bikes JJ and John B shared between themselves.

Nicky tossed the bike against the house before dredging her way inside. Her phone pinging before she entered the porch door. 

Topper 10:09AM: 

Sounds good, pick you up normal spot at 4? 

But before she could respond, the noise of banging from inside the house alerted her and she placed her phone back in her pocket, she tried to open the porch screen quietly but it was old and creaky so it was impossible. Whoever was inside didn’t mind or hear the creaks so Nicky proceeded with caution. It could have been some of low life townies breaking in and stealing whatever was around, but more likely it could have been her father back from whatever bender. She hoped it was the shithead townies, she could scare them easily but her father, that was a whole other beast. 

The living room was quiet when she entered but immediately a figure walking by in the kitchen alerted her. Her eyes jumped to the person. JJ. Relief exhaled out of her mouth and the tension left her body immediately as she rested against the back door. 

“Jesus Christ, JJ. You scared the fuck out of me.” Another sigh left her mouth as she stepped closer to the kitchen. Her relief was short lived when she saw tons of metal pieces and parts littered on their kitchen island and counters. “JJ, what the fuck is this?” 

“It’s our rent, our bills, our past dues, and oh yea,” he lifted up a copper part and smiled at his sister, “free, fun, spending.” 

“JJ what the fuck is all of this?” Nicky wasn’t nearly as happy as her little brother was. Their entire table space was covered, as she got a closer look she realized they were boat parts, some older and rusted and some brand new. 

“Boat and drone parts from the salvage yard.” JJ was so nonchalant in how he answered. 

“JJ.” Nicky stared at everything. 

“Nicky.” JJ mocked her with a laugh. 

“Tell me you didn’t steal all of this.” Her hand raised to her forehead as she processed everything. 

“What does it matter, I can sell this shit off on the mainland and it’ll never come back to us.” JJ acted as if he had everything solved. 

“There’s fuckin trackers in the drone parts, JJ!” Nicky lifted the one part of the drone that was still on. 

JJ was quick to grab it from her and smash it on the table along with the other one he had as well. “Problem solved.” 

Nicky closed her eyes as she tried to think of what to do. “This is fucking theft, JJ.” 

“I’d like to consider it necessary theft.” He tilted his head from side to side as he leveled with his sister. 

“That’s not a real fuckin’ thing, JJ.” She kept saying his name, like that was going to ground him or something. “And even if it was, necessary theft would be stealing food or clothes, something of necessity!” Her voice raised. 

“I’m pretty sure money is a necessity, and these parts = money, Nicky.” JJ was getting aggravated. 

“And what happens if Dad comes home, huh? Sees this shit and fucks off with it? Then what? Then we’re left with the crime and nothing to show for it.” Nicky began arguing with him. 

“Dad’s not fucking coming home. You know that!” JJ met her tone. “C’mon, Nick, we need this.” 

“No, I’m taking care of us. Rent is paid through till the fall, there's food here isn’t there? Our bills are next to nothing because we’re never really here.” Nicky argued the anger boiling in her gut. She did everything to avoid this. 

“Exactly, you’re never here!” JJ yelled now, his voice being fully raised. “I had to step up!” 

“For what reason?! Everything was taken care of! You don’t realize this is just digging you into a hole you’re never going to get out of, everything I do is so you can avoid this shit but you always end up back in it, what the fuck is wrong with you, JJ?!” 

The last sentence cut. He was just trying to help. Nicky knew that, but she was frustrated. 

“I guess I’m just a chip off the ol’ Maybank block.” JJ was hurt, Nicky could hear it in his voice. He was starting to walk away when Nicky blocked him. 

“Fuck, JJ. No I’m sorry.” She grabbed his arms. He looked down at her uncomfortably. “I just, I don’t want this for you, I don’t want this for us.” She pointed at the parts. “I try so hard for us to live comfortably and legally.” She laughed hoping JJ would ease down. 

He did let out a chuckle. “I appreciate you wanting to help, I always do. But this will do more harm than good. We gotta bring it back, or dump it somewhere that it can’t be tracked back to us. It’s too risky to bring it to the mainland and sell it.” Nicky explained in a more calmer voice. 

JJ just nodded, his disheveled hair falling into his face as he did. Nicky nodded back and brought him in for a hug. “I love you, little brother.” 

“Love you too.” He mumbled as he embraced the girl back. 

“You want my help dealing with this?” She pointed to the mess on the table as they ended their hug. 

“Nah, I’ll call John B. We got it over, we can get it back.” His hand raked through his hair. 

Nicky smirked thinking back to John B coming back to the chateau this morning and feeling like an idiot for missing the obvious display of anxiety he had from hiding all of this from her. 

“I got plans in a bit but you wanna hang out tomorrow? Just me and you? I heard I’m never around anymore.” Nicky’s eyebrows raised as she stared at her brother who let his head fall down in a laugh. 

“Yea sounds good, we can catch the morning break if you’re down?” 

“Sounds like a plan, I’m gonna go shower, I smell like the bonfire from last night.” 

JJ nodded again and turned to take care of the hundreds of parts scattered everywhere while Nicky turned to lock herself in the bathroom. That was a lot to digest, there was a lot done and said. While she thought she was doing a good job at hiding things, she was MIA a lot and exhausted from hiding things. But she still felt this was better than the alternative, for now at least. She turned the shower on and as she let the water warm up she brought her phone out. 

Nicky 10:25AM

“Usual spot in an hour?” 

Topper replied within seconds. 

Topper 10:25AM

“Eager to see me? I’ll be there.” 

[toomanystoryideas]

Alright I’ll be ✨nosy✨ if you’re still willing to talk about it— what’s going on with your roommate?

yeah i’ll talk about it!! i haven’t moved out yet so i guess i’ll update if anyone is curious how that goes. here’s the story because it’s kind of long:

anyway i’m a trans man right, but i’m closeted because it probably wouldn’t be safe to come out to my very republican family, so i basically live my life as a woman. and because it’s not safe for my parents to know this, i keep a list in my notes app of everyone i’ve come out to that i know irl. i made it when i was like sixteen and jokingly called it my “hit list” and never really thought much about it after that except updating it whenever i trusted someone enough to open up to them about my identity

i now attend a university in chicago and i have two roommates and two other suitemates who are all women. i’m not out to them because it just didn’t really come up and i didn’t want to make them uncomfortable rooming with a man yknow? i’m used to being closeted it was okay

anyway about two weeks ago now, on the sunday before halloween, i’m in the common lounge area of the floor we live on talking to a few people i’m out to and i told them about my “hit list”. i was being vague because one of my roommates was there but not really listening and i didn’t want to out myself, but regardless i was saying this in a very jokey and lighthearted way, like, a way that should have made it extremely obvious that i am not going to actually kill anyone. because duh? should be obvious it’s just a joke

fast forward to halloween (tuesday); it’s like 11:30pm and i’m alone in our room almost done with my homework. i get a knock at my door and go to open it to find it’s an RA i’ve never met before, who says we have to have a conversation in the RA office downstairs. he tells me someone who heard me saying this (i have a sneaking suspicion it’s one of my “friends”) reported me and i have to explain myself to a worker on the protocol phone line. so i have to vaguely and very uncomfortably out myself, and i’m really emotional and pissed off, but whatever, i’m told the situation is cleared. (my roommates don’t sleep in our room that night and they told me they just didn’t wanna wake me so they had a sleepover with some of our friends.)

anyway the next morning i’m on the train to come back from a class i have in another part of the city and i get an extremely rude email from a dean of students telling me we have to have a meeting at a specific time; he didn’t even ask for my availability. i think the situation is cleared already but i go anyway, really mad about it. so we meet and he’s SO condescending, talking about how what i did is like yelling “fire” in a crowded theater (not true at all?) but eventually i get through to him and he resolves the situation.

but my roommates don’t sleep in the room that night either, which is when it starts to get weird, so i try to ask but they’re kind of icing me out of our entire friend group. eventually one of them tells me they’ve been told to stay in temp housing and they can’t sleep in our room. they tell me they’re not even supposed to talk to me or know the situation.

so i send an angry email to the dean and he calls me on the phone the next day—patronizing as ever—and i tell my roommates they can come back as soon as they’re back from their weekend trip back to their hometown (because, oh yeah, they’re childhood friends from a small town, and i’m their randomly selected third person)

so they do and everything is normal for a little while, but weirdly they don’t ask about it and don’t want to hear about what happened when i offer to tell them. whatever i just don’t talk about it then and we pretend nothing happened.

until about a week ago when our building’s RD emails all five of us saying we have to have a meeting to “process feelings and impacts” or some shit. none of us can agree on a time until we finally meet two nights ago. and that’s when everything goes to shit, because as soon as i re-explain the situation everyone starts freaking the fuck out

basically they are shaking and/or crying saying shit like “you can never say that in a joking way” “that’s never something to joke about” “i’m just worried l like what if it’s real” “so there is a list” “i’ve had panic attacks” “we all lay awake at night wondering if something will happen” “[other roommate] and i lost a pair of scissors and we were freaking out”

the conclusion of this meeting is that they all want me to leave. over a joke i made one time. and the fucked up part is because the dean cleared me, i don’t have to do anything and nobody from admin can make me leave. but my roommates avoid me at all costs and haven’t even been sleeping in the room or coming in more than like for one second once a day to grab something since that meeting happened. so now i don’t want to stay here anyway, since our whole friend group also lives on this floor of this building and i can’t stand to see them all hanging out without me all the time it’s horrible. but i also live in the best freshman residence hall and we’re all in a living learning community so i don’t want to leave this building

the three options i have right now:

move right now into an open spot on a sophomore-only floor of this building (i want this the most but it is NOT likely admin will let this happen)

move into temp housing in a worse building and then move back into a spot on a freshman floor that will only open up after the semester is over (i want to stay in this building so i’d hate the temp housing plus it’s like moving twice within one school year which sounds like torture)

stay here for the rest of this semester and then move into that spot that will open up after the semester is over (i just want to get out of here atp since half the people that live here are either avoiding me or being avoided by me)

sorry for how long this post is lmfao. i’m having a meeting on monday or tuesday probably to discuss the options and see which one i will go with