#I um need to stop writing when half-conscious lol

[spikybanana]

the one where James’ ridiculous faith & trust in others saves them rather than kills them. [jegulily]

cw: injury, very near death experience/appearance

Hearing the chaos from downstairs, Lily rushes down into the living room, wand tight in her hand. And there's James, hunching over the one figure she'd been trying to kill from her head. Regulus. Barely recognisable, the way he’s drenched through, clothes and skin torn to shreds and dyed an eerie green hue of death. Letting out involuntary whimpers, wreathing weakly. Reeking of the chalky tepidness of still waters.

After all this time, Lily thinks, after all the spilled tears and fears and god don’t let him be among who we’re fighting this time, Regulus is on her carpet, gasping and chocking on air. And James is fumbling, terrifiedly trying to collect Regulus into his arms.

“What's going on.” She says, hand shaking around her wand pointing straight at Regulus’ chest. “Give me one good reason to trust this death eater in the same house as my son.”

“Lily, please—”

“You have three seconds to tell me why I shouldn't kill him.”

“Because he'd be dead!” 

Lily has never seen panic on him like that before, and all composure leaves her body. “And why would we care! We don’t know what he’s chosen to get himself into— what he’s become— or who’s on his tail—” 

“Lily, just, just help me look at him.” James sounds as scared as she is angry, and it didn’t help, it didn’t help to keep the panic at bay with anger but one of them has to think— “Lily, stop, please, just— he’s dying— he can’t— will you—”

But Lily is already doing it. With every glance down, diagnoses are forcing their way into her brain. Poison. Not irreversible. Swallowing a sob, she drops herself down by Regulus opposite James. 

Lily could think of a thousand reasons why they absolutely shouldn’t. But— but. This is for Regulus. This is for James. 

“Get the healing pack, James. You know where it is.”

[mimi-cee-hq]

Sendai's Pageant of Starlight - Iwaizumi x Reader

This one-shot is for @cafemiya​. I hope you like it. I get a little nervous writing for other talented writers. :)

Summary: Because of a pair of misplaced skates, you and Iwaizumi end up walking down Jozenji-dori Avenue together almost as if... Wait, is this a date?

Genre and Tropes: Fluff, Getting Together, Friends to Lovers

Words: 1,057

Author's Notes: I did some research on Sendai, but don't expect it to be completely accurate. I did what I could with online articles, photos and Google Maps. lol.

*****

Iwaizumi grabbed his hair as Oikawa asked him for the hundredth time, "Pleeeease. Just for half an hour at least?"

"Ugh," Iwaizumi threw his skates at him, knocking Oikawa over. You sighed at Oikawa's behaviour, but it wasn't like you were any better. Because you had forgotten about your plans in downtown Sendai, you rushed out of your house, leaving not only your skates but also your scarf and mittens.

You bounced your knees as you sat on the stone steps across Kotodai Park, watching the guys tie up their skates. You wanted to go someplace warmer, but that would defeat the purpose of coming here. So you grit your teeth and bore with the wind that bit your cheeks.

"Hey Y/n. Want to walk down Jozenji-dori Avenue?" asked Iwaizumi. "We could pass by a Seven-Eleven or check out some stuff in those heated tents."

Oh. That was right. You had forgotten that all the lights were up for Sendai's Pageant of Starlight. You had a passing thought about how he probably noticed how cold you were, but excitedly, you replied with a grin, "Sure! Let's go!"

As the two of you rounded the corner, you were met with the thousands of lights lining the usually green walkway that parted Jozenji-dori Avenue. Bare trees were now traced with lights. Some were yellow, others were blue and pink but, where you stood, most were laced with crystal white.

And suddenly, all the lights turned off.

"Uhh... what just happened?" asked Iwaizumi.

You giggled at him just as the lights turned back on a second later. "I guess it's 7 o'clock," you told him. "That's when the lights wink at you."

But with your next step, you slipped.

There wasn't much snow left on the ground since this morning's temperatures were above freezing. But it had gotten colder after the sun had set in the late afternoon, producing the patch of black ice that made you tumble.

"Y/n, are you alright?" asked Iwaizumi.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Except now your hands were numb from touching the frigid ice when you broke your fall. 'This is so embarrassing,' you thought, your cheeks suddenly feeling warmer.

A gloved hand offered to help you back to your feet. "Here, put on my gloves," Iwaizumi told you. He must have noticed your bare hands.

"No, it's okay!" you insisted, shoving your hands into your jacket pockets. "Don't worry about it!"

Removing his gloves, he grabbed your hands. "Y/n," he said sternly, "your hands are freezing." When you continued to deny his help, he sighed and placed his glove over your left hand. "We'll just share them then, alright?"

Just as you were about to ask how that would even work, he wrapped his fingers around your right hand and placed both of your hands into his left pocket. You blinked a few times, opening your mouth to say something, but you were speechless.

The warmth from Iwaizumi's hand comforted your cold, stiff fingers. After a while, you were able to move them again – not that you dared to. The rest of your body started to heat up as well and you were sure it was because your crush was holding your hand.

You often studied with Iwaizumi over the nine months of your third year of high school. You simply realized you worked well together after being in the same group for a project. (With a smirk, you also watched him scold the other third years to do their work.) It was all platonic and comfortable for you until you started realizing how attractive he was when you saw a glimpse of his skills as the ace of his team. Or maybe that was just the moment you knew those feelings were there all along.

On the other hand, Iwaizumi never showed any romantic interest in you – at least, not until now. And with his sudden boldness to take your hand so casually, your brain was trying to make sense of everything while your heart wanted you to squeal with joy and release all of your giddy feelings. But with all of this going on in your inner being, you were silent on the outside.

"Uh...," Iwaizumi rubbed the back of his neck, "do you want to grab some hot chocolate for a drink? It might warm you up some more."

"Oh! Umm...," you said shyly. "No thank you." You didn't need it. You were pretty sure the blush on your cheeks – and probably the rest of your body – provided more than enough heat.

You mentally scolded yourself to act like normal, to be comfortable around him like usual. But you gradually stopped being self-conscious, not because you told yourself to, but because Iwaizumi walked you down the avenue, chatting with you like always. You walked under a tunnel of lights together, watching some kids running down from one side and speeding back. You also took a selfie together in front of the star and lights that were fashioned like a Christmas tree.

Then you saw a wall with lights in the shape of a heart. You thought to avoid it, considering the two of you weren't actually on a date. Wait, was this a date?

"Could you take a picture of us?" Iwaizumi asked a passerby, handing his phone for a photo in front of the heart. If his hand still wasn't wrapped around yours, you would have buried your face in your palms.

Standing close by your side, with both his and your hands still in his pocket, he smiled at the camera. When you realized you were staring at him for too long, you finally turned towards the camera as well.

"These turned out nice," Iwaizumi said, smiling at the pictures.

"Um... Iwaizumi..." you started. Your reason had finally won over your feelings. You had to make sure what was going on wasn't just a dream. But before you could ask, he interrupted you.

"Would you consider dating me?" he said in a rush of words. And then you saw it. Under the night sky with the thousands of LED stars, you saw his face turn red, worried about your response.

"A-are you serious?"

"If you don't want to, that's okay too-"

"Yes!!! A thousand times yes!!" you hugged him in delight.

The lights suddenly turned off again signaling that it had been an hour since the first ‘wink’. Iwaizumi gave you a quick kiss during that split second when the lights weren't watching.

*****

"Uhh... Oikawa. Your skates are right here," commented Makki.

"Shhh... Don't tell anyone."

*****

I hope you liked it. Here's my masterlist if you want to check out my other stories and here's my taglist form (Google forms) if you want to be added or removed from my taglist. Info about what is a taglist is on the form as well.

Also, here are the other stories in the Winter Wonderland collab. :)

Taglist: @whootwhoot​ @charmingchikara​ @megumiisee @babythotshq​

[nicknellie]

Anonymous requested: an enemies to lover shot for Juke please

Seeing as you asked so nicely, I couldn’t not do this. This trope, man. I love it so much. Thank you for the suggestion! Also, I gave Julie my own comfort song (it’s held that title for about two years now lol) and I highly suggest you all go listen to it.

Rhythm in my Heart

Julie was beginning to wonder whether joining a band on a whim purely because the boy she had known for twenty minutes had asked her to was really the best idea.

It had gone like this: Julie had been looking for Flynn in the lunch hall but hadn’t been able to see her anywhere. That was weird, mainly because Flynn’s tendency to dress in colours brighter than stars usually made her recognisable anywhere, but also because Julie had seen her just five minutes ago. They had been stood in the line together, Flynn had got her food and hurried off to find a table, but now Julie just couldn’t seem to spot her anywhere.

So, Julie had begun wandering the lunch hall in search of Flynn. Granted, she could have been a little more careful as she did so instead of paying very little attention to her surroundings, but she couldn’t help but be a little worried. Flynn didn’t just disappear like this; normally it was hard to prise her from Julie’s side.

In short, Julie hadn’t been paying attention to what was going on around her as she meandered through the lunch hall. Which was why it was partially her fault when she walked right by somebody just as they jumped out of their seat and threw their arms in the air, knocking her tray from her hands and sending food flying.

Flying right into Julie’s face.

As she blinked tomato sauce out of her eyes, Julie could feel the eyes of hundreds of Los Feliz’s students on her, could practically hear them gawking and taking photos of her as she stood there covered in spaghetti. She was dimly aware of somebody apologising over and over again, but all she was really conscious of was the fact that she was angry. Really angry.

Julie wiped furiously at her face, picked a long strand of spaghetti off her jumper, and glared at the person stood in front of her, the one who had knocked her tray. It was a boy, maybe a year or two older than her, and she had to admit that he did look apologetic. But that wasn’t the point – all the puppy-dog eyes in the world wouldn’t get sauce stains out of her best jumper.

“I am so sorry,” the boy said when Julie locked eyes with him. He picked up a napkin with fumbling fingers and began dabbing at the hem of her jumper. She yanked the material away from him and, if possible, glared harder. The boy shrank away a little.

She swiped the napkin from his hand. “I got it,” she hissed.

“Um, I’ll, um… I can buy you another lunch?” the boy offered, scratching at the back of his head. “It was my fault, I shouldn’t have whacked the tray, I… Is there anything I can do?”

“Yes,” Julie seethed. “You can leave me alone.”

With that, she picked up the tray off the floor, dusted herself off a little more in an attempt to retain some sort of dignity, then tried to brush past the boy.

“My name is Luke, by the way,” he called after her. Julie didn’t respond, she just kept walking.

Luckily, even through all the stares and jeers and people getting in her way purely to laugh at her, it didn’t take Julie too long to find Flynn afterwards. She was sat right at the back of the hall at what appeared to be the only empty table, scrolling on her phone. When she saw Julie heading her way, she gave her usual bright smile, but it melted into mingled confusion and disgust when she saw that Julie was in fact covered in pasta and sauce.

“You got a little something there,” Flynn said, pointing to her own cheek. She was very clearly trying not to laugh, which Julie didn’t appreciate it.

“Thanks,” she deadpanned, “I hadn’t noticed.”

“Is there a reason you’re wearing your lunch instead of eating it?”

“You didn’t see?” Julie asked.

Flynn shook her head then scrolled down a little on her phone and said, “Ah. Now I see.”

Julie’s eyes widened and she grabbed Flynn’s phone in a panic. Sure enough, multiple pictures of Luke knocking her tray and her being covered in food had already made their way onto Instagram. With a frustrated sigh, she handed Flynn’s phone back to her.

“I hate this school,” she said.

Flynn patted her arm comfortingly. “At least you have your amazing and supportive best friend by your side.”

“You’re still trying not to laugh.”

Flynn snorted, but quickly tried to mask her amusement again. It didn’t work.

“I’m sorry,” she said in between laughs, “but it’s hard to take you seriously when there’s spaghetti in your hair.”

The whole incident had taken up enough time that there was only five minutes left of the lunch period anyway. Julie put her tray away and headed to the toilets to clean up as best she could – all she could really do was wash her face with the scalding water that came from the school’s taps, but it was better than nothing.

She tried to let the rest of the day cheer her up, but it just wouldn’t work. Not even the fact that she had dance class with Flynn and Nick could brighten her mood. She really needed a miracle.

Whenever Julie was feeling down, music was the one thing that could cheer her up. That had always been the way. When she was young, it had been the soothing, melodic voice of her mother Rose that had been the thing to calm her down; as she grew up, her comfort songs had been ballads by her favourite bands; nowadays, Julie’s own music was what she used to cope. Making her own music, her own sound, it felt so personal and freeing that it just made sense that it would help her out of any dark place.

So, when school finished, she headed down to the music rooms instead of going back home. Usually, if a student wanted the use of a music room after school they’d have to book it in advance, which Julie hadn’t, but she figured that she would only be in there for a few minutes so it wouldn’t matter.

She slipped into the closest and smallest music practise room – it housed only a piano, an amp, and a strange array of sheet music ranging from Beethoven’s Piano Sonata No. 8 to Jingle Bells. Julie quietly shut the door behind her and settled herself at the piano.

Just like that, she felt herself begin to relax. She could forget that her jumper was still stained, she could forget that even dance class hadn’t cheered her up, she could forget that anything bad had happened that day at all. She let her fingers rest atop the keys for just a moment before she began to play what was her current comfort song, Einaudi’s Nuvole Bianche.

She lost herself and the bad feeling all in one go.

It wasn’t until she heard the door to the practise room opening that she stopped and remembered that she wasn’t actually supposed to be there.

She abruptly turned to face the door, standing up and grabbing her bag, ready to leave. In the doorway stood a boy with a bass guitar slung over his shoulder. His eyes were wide, his mouth open, and he was staring at Julie like he’d seen a ghost.

“Sorry,” she said hurriedly, “I didn’t realise somebody else had booked this room, I’ll go and you–”

“Dude,” the boy interrupted, coming into the room and letting the door fall shut behind him. “That was awesome! You shred on the piano, man!”

Julie recognised the expression on his face then. It was awe.

She laughed nervously. “It’s nothing. Thanks, though. I need to get going.”

The boy frowned as Julie tried to move past him out of the room. “You can stay if you want, I don’t mind. We can jam together! Or you could teach me piano – I’ve been trying to learn by myself, I only know a few chords so far, but I’m getting pretty good. Watch this!”

He put his bass down, readied his hands above the piano, and plonked out a basic chord pattern. When he was done, he turned to Julie and beamed proudly. She couldn’t help but smile.

“That’s great,” she said. “Well done. Are you sure you want me to stay? You booked the room, I don’t want to get in your way.”

The boy waved her away. “No, come on. It’ll be fun. We can write a song or something! My name’s Reggie.”

Julie hesitated for a moment, but then made up her mind. She smiled and said, “I’m Julie. Nice to meet you.”

For the next twenty minutes, Julie and Reggie sat side-by-side on the far too small piano stool as Julie tried to teach him how to play the piano. He was a quick learner, and within that time she had managed to help him block the chords for a country song he was wanting to write.

She was about to move on to telling him about basslines (which, she thought, he should have been pretty good at already since he had shown up with a bass guitar) when he gasped loudly and hit her arm.

“You should join my band!” he exclaimed.

“You have a band?” Julie asked.

Reggie nodded excitedly. “Yeah! We’re called Sunset Curve, we’re a rock band. Our rhythm guitarist just left and we’ve been looking for somebody to take his place.”

Julie pointed to the piano. “That’s not a guitar.”

“Well, no,” Reggie admitted, “but we don’t have a piano either and we’ve always talked about finding someone who could do it. It could be you, Julie! Think about how much fun it could be!”

“Who else is in your band?” Julie asked. She couldn’t believe she was actually considering it.

“It’s just me and two of my buddies, they play lead guitar and drums. We have a really good sound, but it would be awesome if we added a piano. What do you say?”

Julie didn’t know whether it was the stress of her bad day getting the better of her, or the relaxation of playing the piano, or just the fact that Reggie was impossible to say no to, but she found herself shrugging her shoulders and saying, “Sure. When do we rehearse?”

She was regretting that now.

It was the following weekend and Julie had just arrived at what Reggie had described to her as a studio. She wasn’t sure the dimly lit garage with a low-tech amp and half a drum kit could really qualify as a studio, but she supposed that the homely touches like the dartboard and some drawings hung on the wall made it feel a little nicer. She shrugged off her coat and then regretted it because it was freezing cold in the ‘studio’.

“Hey Julie,” greeted Reggie excitedly. He waved at her from his perch atop the amp, beckoning her over. “Come and meet the guys!”

Julie headed in his direction and saw that he was sat with two other boys. One of them, a blond with a shy smile wearing a thick pink hoodie, was sat behind the incomplete drum kit – he gave a little wave with a drumstick in his hand and said, “Hey, I’m Alex, how’s it going?”

“Nice to meet you,” she replied. “I’m Julie.”

Julie turned to the other boy and immediately felt her face fall. The last time she’d seen him she’d had tomato sauce in her eyes but there was still no chance that she would forget those stupid puppy-dog eyes and that ridiculous haircut – it was the idiot who had spoiled her lunch.

“You,” she seethed.

The boy – what was his name? Lucas? Lydon? Larry? – looked utterly terrified. He took a step back from Julie with a nervous laugh and hit his back on Reggie’s amp.

“Hey… Fancy seeing you here!” he said, trying for a smile but failing miserably.

Reggie and Alex looked between each other, confused.

“You two know each other?” Alex asked.

“Know is a strong word,” the lunch-ruiner said nervously. “We’ve met.”

“Unfortunately,” Julie growled. She turned to Reggie. “I’m not sure this is going to work out, Reggie. I’m sorry.”

Reggie looked hurt, which was the only reason Julie didn’t walk out of the room right that moment. “Oh, come on, Julie! You’ve got him all wrong!”

“I’m sure whatever Luke did to upset you was stupid and entirely his fault,” said Alex (to which Luke – Luke, that was his name, she remembered now – weakly protested, “Hey!”), “but from what Reggie’s told us we could really use you in the band. We’d love to have you and we promise to try and keep Luke on his best behaviour.”

Julie sighed heavily, frowning as she looked between the boys. She knew that Reggie was an absolute sweetheart, and Alex seemed to be kind and sensible – maybe she could hold a grudge against Luke and the other two band members could make it work.

“Fine,” she huffed, pointing a finger at Luke. “But I’m not promising that I’ll like you.”

He shook his head, eyes wide. “It’s cool. Thanks for sticking around.”

The rehearsal went… interestingly. The piano they’d got Julie was hardly a piano at all – it was a little keyboard that only ranged two octaves and its keys were tiny, although it did have a delightful range of demos and sounds that Reggie spent ten minutes trying out. When they got to playing, Julie could hardly even hear herself, but the others all seemed to think it sounded good.

Julie found out that Luke was on lead vocals with Alex and Reggie backing him. He had written out a score for all their parts including his vocal line, but when he sang part of it Julie realised it was wrong – he was singing an E when it very clearly stated on the sheet music that it was supposed to be a C-sharp. She wasn’t going to say anything (it was her first day with the band and she didn’t want to overstep by correcting the boy who seemed to be their unofficial leader) but eventually it got too annoying.

“You’re singing that line wrong,” she told him flatly. Everyone looked to her, eyes wide.

“What?” Luke said, smiling but sounding insulted. “I’m pretty sure I’m not.”

She shrugged lightly. “I’m pretty sure you are, but go off, I guess.”

Luke’s smile widened even more but didn’t reach his eyes - definitely fake, definitely passive-aggressive. “What do you think I’m doing wrong?” he asked through gritted teeth.

Julie pointed to the music. “You’re singing an E on this line, but you’ve written a C-sharp. Want me to demonstrate?”

“I got it,” Luke snarled, snatching the music.

“I’d like to hear Julie demonstrate,” Reggie piped up, raising his hand. “Please, Julie?”

“Happily,” Julie said. “You’re singing this: I got a spark in me.” She ended on an E. “You’ve written this: I got a spark in me.” She ended on the C-sharp.  “Personally, I think what you’re singing sounds better than what you’ve written, but you’ll need to change one of them.”

Luke scowled. “Thanks. But I told you, I’ve got it.”

Julie turned to Alex and Reggie - both of whom had been watching their back and forth like a thrilling tennis match, heads bobbing in one direction then another - but now both of them were staring at Julie with their mouths ajar, seemingly unable to close them. 

“Woah,” Reggie breathed.

“You’re amazing, Julie,” Alex said. 

Reggie flung his hand into the air. “All those in favour of making Julie our new lead singer?”

Alex’s hand joined Reggie’s and slowly, just to annoy Luke further, Julie raised her own hand. Luke looked furious and betrayed.

“Hey,” he said, wounded, “I’m our lead singer.”

“Dude, that girl has the voice of an angel,” Reggie told him matter-of-factly, pointing at Julie who beamed back at him. “And if we make her our lead singer, you’ll be able to focus on things like neatening up your guitar solos.”

Luke gasped indignantly. “My guitar solos are perfectly neat!”

“Actually,” Julie interjected, “I wasn’t going to say anything but you’re coming in late on bar twenty-eight.”

Luke ignored her. “I’m our lead singer,” he repeated.

“Why don’t you share it?” Alex suggested, standing up. From the way Reggie and Luke immediately paid attention to him, Julie got the impression that Alex often had to act as a mediator when it came to band-based arguments. His unimpressed expression hinted that maybe he’d had to do this same thing one too many times. “You can both be lead singers. I think that’ll work - both of your voices are too good to omit completely.”

“You’ve heard her sing one line!”

“And she did it better than you,” Alex said flatly. “Now can we please carry on with rehearsal?”

Luke grumbled something, but readied his guitar again. Julie began playing her chords and, assuming they’d made their decision that both of them were going to be the lead, began to sing.

*

“So what you’re telling me is that you have a huge crush on this guy.”

“I have absolutely no idea where you got that from.”

Three weeks had passed since Julie’s first rehearsal with the boys. After a suggestion from Reggie and a heated debate that had transformed into a full-blown argument between Julie and Luke, Sunset Curve had been renamed to Julie and the Phantoms. Julie would now sing the melody with Luke on harmonies (an arrangement that had been painful to reach), and Alex and Reggie were happy to stay on backing vocals.

Julie was at her favourite ice cream parlour with Flynn - they were both tucking into enormous ice cream sundaes that both had claimed they would be able to finish but likely wouldn’t, and Julie was trying to tell Flynn about how annoying Luke had been at rehearsal the other day.

“I got it from the way you talk about him,” Flynn said, accusingly pointing her spoon at Julie. “And from the way your face looks when you talk about him. And from what I saw when I picked you up from rehearsal the other day.”

Julie shook her head. She did not have a crush on Luke.

“You’re going to need to explain a little better than that,” she told Flynn.

Flynn sat up straighter, smiling brightly. “Gladly. First of all, the way you talk about him - you may be describing your arguments, but you throw in compliments that are disguised as insults.”

“I do not do that,” Julie scoffed.

Flynn raised an eyebrow. “I can give examples. Like ‘He would be a lot easier to like if he didn’t have such a distractingly perfect smile, it gets in the way’. Or how about—”

“Okay,” Julie said, raising her hands. “I don’t need more examples. Just... just carry on explaining.”

“The way your face looks when you talk about him,” Flynn continued. “It’s kind of gross, actually. You go all starry-eyed and you smile like a dope, and if I’m honest I don’t understand how you don’t realise you’re doing it. Like, surely you feel your cheeks hurt when you smile that wide?”

“Ha ha,” Julie monotoned.

“I’m not joking.”

“Whatever. What else makes you so sure I like Luke? Which I do not.”

Flynn looked triumphant, as if whatever she said next would be the end of the discussion.

“The other day, when I came to the studio to walk you back to mine, Alex and Reggie came out way before you two. And when you and Luke finally emerged, you were both doing the heart-eyes-and-smile combo. And you were punching each other all playfully, which is definitely flirting. Then you tried to play it off like it was an actual argument!”

Julie rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, leaning back in her chair.

“That doesn’t mean anything,” she said. It was Flynn’s turn to roll her eyes. “It doesn’t! Just because he wasn’t unbearable that one time, it doesn’t mean I like him. In any way.”

“If you’re sure,” Flynn said, half defeated and half resigned.

“I am.”

But the thing was, Julie absolutely was not sure.

The band rehearsed the next day. Luke had managed to line up a gig that would take place in a fortnight’s time, so they were trying to get as much practise in as possible. In Julie’s extremely biased opinion, their set sounded fabulous - she had grudgingly worked with Luke to write most of it, and though she hated to say it, when they wrote together their songs were phenomenal.

As usual, Alex and Reggie headed out first. Really, that shouldn’t have been the case seeing as Alex’s instrument took the longest time to disassemble and Reggie was easily distracted, but Julie and Luke normally ended up being the last two there. It had started when Julie had reluctantly hung around to apologise to Luke for stealing his role of lead singer, and had become something of a habit.

“I was thinking,” Luke said to her as he packed away his guitar, “if we get Reggie and Alex to add echoes to the chorus in Great, it could sound really good. What do you think?”

Julie smiled. “Yeah. It’s a great idea, I’m surprised you thought of it.”

“Very funny,” Luke said, rolling his eyes. Julie noticed the tiny smile playing about his lips and couldn’t help but fight a smile of her own. “You are so hilarious it’s unbelievable.”

“I try,” she said with a shrug. And then her mouth didn’t consult her brain before saying, “Are you doing anything now?”

Luke looked at her, bewildered. “Why? Are you?”

Julie blinked, caught off guard by the situation. She hadn’t meant to say that. Now it sounded like she wanted to do something with him. She wasn’t meant to want to do something with him because Julie and Luke didn’t like each other. That was their whole relationship - dislike! She couldn’t ruin that by spending time with him.

Again, her mouth spoke before her brain could catch up. “No. Do you want to hang out, do something together? Just the two of us?”

Luke looked as confused as Julie felt.

“Yeah,” he said. “Sounds good.”

They didn’t end up leaving the studio. Instead, they sat together on the couch that Luke and Reggie had dragged in off the street one day (Alex and Julie had both refused to sit on it until they’d disinfected it thirty times and checked it for any number of animals, ranging from spiders to rats (god forbid)) and tried to work on some new songs.

Luke pulled his songbook out for inspiration and handed it to Julie to skim through. She skipped past the songs they had already performed or rehearsed to some further back. Luke, unlike any sane person, didn’t use his notebooks chronologically, so there were new songs and very old ones mixed in throughout.

Julie found herself not turning one page for a while. Eventually Luke realised that she wasn’t listening to him talk about chords, and looked over her shoulder. When he saw what she was reading, he snatched the book away.

“Why don’t we just try and think up something completely different to our usual stuff,” he suggested, clearly trying to change the subject.

Julie didn’t want to press.

She did anyway.

“That seemed pretty different to our usual stuff,” she said softly. “Luke... who’s Emily?”

She knew she didn’t have a right to be upset. She didn’t know why she was upset. It wasn’t as if she liked Luke; if he had a girlfriend or someone he fancied enough to write a song about then that was none of her business. She didn’t get to fret over the love life of a boy she didn’t even like.

Luke looked at her for a long time. She held eye contact. She could see the cogs turning in his head, see him considering whether or not to tell her.

Finally, he sighed and said, “Emily is my mom.”

Julie tried not to react. She hadn’t been expecting that response, and upon hearing that Emily wasn’t Luke’s girlfriend something inside her did a happy little jump. But Luke’s face was solemn and tense, so Julie knew that she had to be sensible right now. Obviously, whatever Luke was saying wasn’t something easy.

“Your mom?” she prompted.

Luke nervously tugged his beanie a little lower. “Yeah... she’s my mom. I wrote that for her last year. She... I... We... We had an argument - well, we had loads of arguments - but this was the worst one. I ran away from home after it happened and I’ve not been back or seen her at all. I... I wanted to do something for her or at least get some stuff off my chest, so I wrote that song.”

“Do Alex and Reggie know?” Julie asked tentatively.

“About the song or the argument?”

“Both.”

He nodded. “Yeah, they know. They’ve played the song with me before, and our old rhythm guitarist Bobby did too. It was really cool of them - they don’t bring it up unless I do first. It’s kind of hard sometimes. Like, I want to talk about it, but I don’t want to be the one to start. I wish they would sometimes.”

Julie nodded. “I get it.”

He shook his head. “And they let me sleep at their houses before I found my own place - here.” He gestured vaguely around the studio.

Julie felt her eyes widen. The draughty roof, the leaky walls, the way that the couch and thin blanket was the only bed in sight.

“You live here?” she said, astounded.

He shrugged. “It’s not much. It’s all I’ve got. And... well, I’d like to go home one day, anyway. It isn’t permanent.”

Julie had no response. Luke was practically homeless, living in their studio. It was nothing. Nothing. He had nowhere to go.

“You can come and stay at my house whenever you want,” Julie said quickly. “My dad won’t mind. He won’t want you sleeping in the cold.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

“I’m worried about you.”

“Don’t be.”

“I am.”

There was silence for a moment. Luke looked at Julie and Julie looked at Luke. She felt on the edge of something, she didn’t know what. Being there with Luke felt... exciting, even despite the conversation they were having. Just the two of them, alone, talking without walls built around themselves.

“I really do get it, you know,” she said quietly. “How it feels not to see your mom.”

Luke straightened up, his face scrunched in curiosity. “What do you mean?”

Julie took a deep breath. “My mom passed away about a year ago. Music was our thing... it took me ages to play again without her. I still haven’t been able to face writing about her or anything like that. But my point is that I know how it feels to have the most important person in your life missing. There one day and gone the next.” She huffed a mirthless laugh that turned into a sniffle.

She felt Luke take her hand.

“You are not alone, Julie.”

She held his hand in return.

“Neither are you.”

*

“Oh please, you two are so in love!” Flynn exclaimed when Julie told her the story. Julie smacked her arm.

“It’s not love,” she insisted. “But... fine, maybe I like him. He’s a lot different to how I first thought.”

“What are you going to do?” Flynn asked excitedly, her legs bouncing up and down.

Julie sighed. “I have no idea.”

*

It turned out that Julie didn’t need to have any idea of what she was going to do. It happened naturally.

Julie and the Phantoms finished their set at the gig Luke had booked them - with a flourish and a fancy trick of the light that Flynn and Julie had helped Reggie sort out, the boys disappeared off stage in the blink of an eye, and the audience applauded Julie as she instructed them to, “Tell your friends!”

It had gone swimmingly. Julie had hit the high note in Bright perfectly despite struggling with it in almost every rehearsal; Luke’s harmonies had been on point; Alex had more confidence with each song, adding more complicated drum fills as time went on; and as usual Reggie’s incredible stage presence had the audience howling and enjoying themselves. Julie was proud of all of them to an almost dangerous degree.

Elated, she hurried off stage after the boys. They were all huddled together backstage and grinned when they saw Julie coming towards them.

She didn’t think. It happened automatically. Running on adrenaline, she flung herself at Luke, crushing him in a tight hug. Luckily it appeared that he was ready too, because he hugged her back with ferocity and lifted her off her feet, spinning them around.

“You were incredible, Julie,” he said, laughing, “they were loving you!”

“They loved us,” Julie said as Luke put her down. 

She had intended to congratulate Alex and Reggie too, but suddenly found herself unable to look away from Luke. His hands were still on her waist, and hers on his shoulders. She didn’t want either of them to move.

Distantly, she heard Alex and Reggie shuffle away.

“Listen, Julie,” Luke said, voice raspy. “Ever since... I was going to say ‘ever since our conversation in the studio’ but actually I don’t know when it started. Ever since sometime, I’ve been wanting to tell you something.”

She swallowed. “I’ve been wanting to tell you something too.”

“I hope it’s the same as what I have to say,” Luke laughed. Then he turned a little more serious again. “It’s... I really like you, Julie. I think you’re an amazing singer and you improve the band a ton and you make me a better writer. You make me a better person. I just... I really like you.”

Julie couldn’t help but smile. “I really like you too, Luke. I really, really like you.”

“Really?” he asked, beaming.

“Really.”

“Thank god,” he said, and Julie couldn’t help but laugh. “The guys said you did but I wasn’t sure.”

“Tell me about it,” Julie said, “Flynn’s been on at me about this for ages.”

He laughed, smiling and ducking his head. “You really are something, Julie.”

She playfully punched his arm. “So are you.”

[sunkissedpages]

We’re Only Kidding Ourselves- Part Seventeen || Tom Holland x Reader

A/N: oh my god SEVENTEEN PARTS into this series the lovers part of enemies to lovers comes into play... I’m speechless honestly lol

Prompt: Enemies to lovers au (from @marvelellie‘s 1k writing challenge!!)

Summary: You work as a production assistant for the Spider-Man: Far From Home crew, or rather as Tom Holland’s handler. The two of you don’t get along very well to say the least, but you won’t quit and he can’t fire you so you’re stuck with each other.

Warnings: swearing, smut

What I listened to while writing: you already know

Word Count: 2.3k

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven | Part Eight | Part Nine| Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen

“Oh the pool’s been closed since eleven.”

“What? Why are we up here? Won’t we get in trouble?”

“My other assistant, Harrison, asked if we could use the pool after hours and management said we could.”

“Why didn’t you just say that?”

He smirked. “Wanted to see you sweat.”

You splashed water in his direction. “Asshole.”

His mouth hung open, feigning offense. You stuck your tongue out. “Oh, you do not want to start this with me.”

“Is that a threat?” you asked, splashing him again with a little more force.

He scoffed slightly and splashed you back using both hands, completely dousing you with water. “Like I said...”

“Oh, fuck you,” you bit out, wiping water from your eyes.

“You wish,” Tom snapped back a little too quickly, and a little too confidently.

You blinked your eyes back open and stared straight at him. “What was that?”

“Nothing,” he said with a smirk.

You narrowed your eyes. “Right.”

It was quiet for a moment, and you wondered if Tom had said that because he knew about your sex dream. He hadn’t said anything else about it, but you couldn’t be sure. Your cheeks grew warm just the same.

Showing no sign that you were going to splash him again Tom moved to stand next to you against the wall of the pool. The tile was cool against your back, making you shiver.

“Cold?” he asked, looking over at you.

“Just a little,” you admitted, wrapping your arms around yourself.

“Wanna go in?”

You looked up at the stars straining to be seen behind thin layers of clouds and took a deep breath of fresh air. “Mm, not just yet.”

You weren’t ready to let go of this moment, of this night, just yet, because tomorrow you’d have to go back to being a handler. Tomorrow meant schedules and flights and calls and protocol. Tonight was for you.

“Y/n,” Tom said suddenly, making you turn towards him. “I’m sorry.” You felt your body grow stiff with surprise as he continued. “I”m sorry for being so shitty, about that text, about everything. I know you were kind of just stuck with this job, and you didn’t deserve how much of an asshole I was to you. And I know that we get along more now, but I never really apologized, so, uh, I felt like I should.”

It wasn’t the most eloquent apology, but it was what you had been waiting on for three and a half months.

Then, in a move not even you could predict, you turned and kissed him gently on the lips. You didn’t give him enough time to react, because you were equally just as shocked that you’d done that, before pulling away.

“Um, there, now we’re even.”

Tom was speechless for a moment, and you pictured yourself banging on Harry and Haz’s door and begging them to let them sleep on your floor, before the corners of his mouth turned up into a smile.

“I don’t think so.”

You sputtered. “Wha- you kissed me, I kissed you, we’re even.”

“No way, I kissed you for like way longer.”

“But you said yours didn’t mean anything,” you protested.

“Are you saying yours did?”

“I- you-”

“I think you’re going to have to kiss me again if we’re really going to be even.”

You narrowed your eyes at him, but you were smiling. You pushed yourself up on your tiptoes to reach his lips and kissed him again. He kissed you back this time, and leaned down so that you could settle back on your feet. He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you close to him so that you could feel the warmth radiating from his body.

In the back of your mind you wondered what would happen to you if you got caught, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care. His lips were soft, like you remembered, but this time they were burning. Tom had always run hot, both emotionally and temperature-wise - you never grew cold in bed beside him, but this was entirely different.

Slyly, he moved his lips to the base of your jaw making you moan quietly. The noise only encouraged him to move further down your neck, and you were sure there would be marks you’d have to cover in the morning.

Suddenly, Tom broke away. “What about Harrison?” he asked.

“What about him?”

“Aren’t you two...” he trailed off.

“How is that your business?” you asked defensively, as was your instinct.

Tom pulled you closer to him, reminding you that you were still in his arms. “You’re kidding, right?”

“Right, well for what it’s worth, there’s nothing.”

He looked at like you like he didn’t believe you, but you weren’t sure what else to say. There wasn’t anything going on between you and Harrison, and you weren’t sure why Tom was so sure there was when he was around you all day and every day and saw the two of you interacting, but it was clearly something he was hung up on.

“Hey, who am I here with right now?” you asked, brushing his cheek with your hand. You sucked in a breath. It was the first time you’d touched his face, at least intentionally. Tom had such a beautiful face, he did, and whatever appreciation you’d had for it before you started working for him had vanished the second you met him, but now it was back in full force and you were in utter awe of the man standing before you. You knew he was a little self-conscious about his acne scars, but you liked them. You thought they made him a little more human.You had scars of your own too.

You couldn’t help but feel a little insecure about yourself as you looked into Tom’s eyes. As if he could sense it he took your hand from his cheek and kissed the back of it. Then, almost like he was asking permission again, he leaned toward you slowly. You met him halfway and kissed him, winding a hand through his wet curls.

Your heartbeat was thundering in your ears as you wondered for a second if this was actually real life. It was confirmed when Tom snaked one hand cheekily from your waist down to your ass. You smiled to yourself and slipped your tongue into his mouth, making him moan. The material of his swimsuit was loose, and being pressed up against him left almost nothing to imagination. You clenched your legs together at the thought, which didn’t go unnoticed by Tom.

“Fuck,” he cursed against you and pulled back. ”Wanna get out of here?” he asked nodding towards the door.

“Yeah,” you said breathily with a smile and allowed him to lead you by the hand down the stairs and back into the room. Despite the chill in the air, his hand was warm. It was a comfort to the nerves tingling all throughout your body.

You giggled as you struggled to keep up with Tom who was pulling you along down the hallway, obviously eager.

“Shit, do you have a key?” he asked, looking up into your eyes when you stopped in front of the door.

You rolled your eyes and handed him yours. “I don’t know how you survived before me.”

He grinned. “Neither do I.”

Once inside he was back on top of you even before the door shut all the way, pressing you against the wall and kissing you harshly. Your hands moved to his swim shorts and you began untying them as he pressed hot kisses down your neck. Both of you were still soaking wet which made the undressing part that much harder. You stifled a giggle as Tom struggled to wriggle out of his swim trunks until he was left only wearing briefs.

Then his hands were behind your back unclipping your bikini top without needing any help. As dumb as it was it only turned you on more and you moaned softly as he tossed your top over by his discarded shorts before kneeling down on the the carpet in front of you to pull down your swimsuit bottoms.

“Fuck, y/n you’re soaked.”

“We did just go swimming,” you managed to get out through shaky breaths and Tom looked up at you with a glare. Half of you wanted to laugh and the other half of you wanted to moan. The sight of him annoyed, down on his knees for you was driving you insane. Maybe you should have fucked him him a long time ago.

“You know what I mean,” he growled.

“Don’t flatter yourself, Holland.”

Tom rose slowly, trailing fingers up your legs as he did so. He met your eyes and you swallowed thickly at the sight of him. His eyes were dark, almost black, with desire and his lips were pink and swollen. You kissed him again, and he moaned against you as you did. He pulled away so that he could step out of his briefs, and then he was yours again, kissing you first on the lips, then the neck, til he reached your collarbone. You felt your knees go weak and slumped forward against him. He caught you with ease and together you stumbled through the familiar room over to the bed. You could tell he was trying not to be too cocky about the effect he was having on you, but a smirk still played at his lips, not that you were complaining.

The bed squeaked as you fell back onto it with all of your weight, then again when Tom climbed on top of you. He kissed you again and let his left hand travel further, fingers hovering on your inner thigh, right above where you needed him most.

“Please,” you whined and it was all it took for him to insert two digits inside of you.

You bit down hard on your lip to stifle a moan, and heard Tom’s breath catch in his throat as you did. You knew that if you weren’t in a hotel room with thin walls, you wouldn’t bother, and let Tom know just how good he was making you feel, but you didn’t even know what time it was. A call from the front desk about angry neighbors was the last thing you needed right now.

Tom attached his thumb to your clit as he worked his fingers in and out of you and you gasped out at the sensation, arching your back off the bed. You moved the hand that wasn’t fisting the sheets over to Tom’s leg, reaching around blindly for his dick. With an exasperated laugh he grabbed your wrist with his free hand and guided you to it. He was already rock hard, thanks to what had gone down at the pool, making the rest of your job easy. You stroked it slowly at first, running your thumb over the tip.

You picked up the pace as you felt yourself getting closer, causing Tom to hiss out. “Fuck,” he said. “Feel good?”

You nodded in answer, not trusting yourself to speak.

Without warning, Tom removed his hand from you entirely. You whined at the loss of contact. “Hold on,” he said and lept off of the bed. You craned your neck to see him rifling through clothes on the floor. His absence left you tempted to touch yourself, but you refrained, knowing he’d be back to give you what you really craved momentarily.

You smirked as Tom pulled a condom out of the pocket of a pair of jeans on the floor before climbing back onto the bed.

“How long have you had those?”

“Shut up, they weren’t meant for you.”

“Uh huh, sure,” you said snarkily, still breathing heavily, watching as he ripped the packet open with his teeth and rolled the condom on.

“You’re sure about this?” he asked, positioning himself above you. You took a second to take in the sight of him, holding himself up over you, muscles flexed, hair a mess, eyes full of lust.

“God yes.”

He didn’t waste another moment before pushing himself inside of you, letting you adjust to the stretch before finding a rhythm that had you seeing stars.

“Shit, Tom,” you moaned as he thrust deeper into you still.

You wanted to tell yourself that this didn’t mean anything, that this was just hate sex. But having hate sex with someone was usually rough and didn’t usually involve so much kissing, so much passion. But aside from all of that, the truth was, you didn’t hate Tom Holland anymore.

You didn’t give the admission to yourself another thought as you let yourself get lost in the pleasure.

When Tom’s hand found its way back to your clit you knew he was getting close. His hips stuttered and his thrusts faltered a bit as he chased his high, not wanting to get there before you. You urged him to keep going, begged him not to stop to let him know you were right there with him, teetering on the edge.

“Fuck, y/n.” he groaned, and hearing him call out your name was all it took for you to collapse, to finally fall over the edge, and Tom wasn’t far behind you.

He crumbled on top of you with all of his weight afterward, still inside you, breathing hard like he’d just run a marathon. Even though you were both sweaty and spent it was kind of nice. You let your fingers run through his chlorine saturated hair and felt him smile against your chest before pulling out and rolling over.

You both laid on your backs in silence, breathing shallowly, daring the other to break the silence. You didn’t know what the morning would hold, but it was safe to say you’d sleep without a pillow barrier between you that night.

okay, there it is! hope you liked it! it was fun, but hard as fuck (no pun intended) to write lol *also just a note: keeping condoms in pockets is not safe!! that shit gets worn down, which I’m sure you all know, but just wanted to remind you all to have safe sex, friends :) lmk what you thought I always appreciate feedback!!

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[benhardyisdaddy]

Check Up

MASTERLIST 

(here it is babies :’) that request yall have been wanting and i hope u like it, im sorry if its not as good. i literally don’t know any doctor terms so yeah i guessed LOL ily all sm BYEEE)

Word Count: 2,675

The bell on the door jingles as you open it up. Cool air washes over you as a slight chill creates tiny goosebumps all over. You walk inside the building and look around. There are two old women in the waiting room and they’re both reading magazines. You looked towards the front desk and slowly walk up. A young, pretty brunette greets you with a wide smile.

“Hi, do you have an appointment?” she asks cheerfully.

You can’t help but smile back. Hers was so contagious.

“Um, yeah. I have an appointment with Doctor Taylor.” you say.

You were at your six month checkup at the gynecologist. You hadn’t been going like you were supposed to, so you are starting to change that. This was a brand new doctor you chose and you were slightly nervous. You were sure that this man was old and had been in this line of practice for a while.

“Oh, perfect. Miss (Y/L/N)?” she asks, confirming you.

“That’s me.” you reply back, smiling.

The lady nods and types for a moment on the computer. You glance around and take in everything. Everything was marble and almost beautiful. It was clean and you were comfortable with your decision on choosing this place. The lady looks back to you.

“Alright, Miss (Y/L/N), you’re all checked in. We have everything we need so just take a seat and you’ll be called back shortly.”

You thank the lady and find a seat facing the door. You sit down and fidget with your hands. You were use to a women being your doctor, so having a man do it was almost nerve wracking to you. You shake your leg and space out deep in thought, not even noticing the door open up and a women looking around.

“(Y/N)?” she calls out.

You look up quickly and stand. She smiles to you as you walk towards her.

“Hi, (Y/N). Just gonna take you back to your room and get you all settled in.”

You walk down a narrow hallway and pass by a closed door. A man was speaking on the inside and you couldn’t help but catch his voice. It was smooth and attractive and you caught yourself wishing you could see the face behind it. The nurse leads you to a room all the way in the back and you step in. A table is sat in the middle of the room and a hospital type gown is folded neatly on top of it.

“Alright, so if you wouldn’t mind taking off your jeans and underwear and putting the gown on. When you’re done, just sit on the table and the doctor will be in here with you shortly. He’s just finishing up with a patient.”

You nod and sit your purse down on a table in the corner.

“You’re in here for just a check up, correct?” she asks.

“Oh, yeah. Just a check up.”

The nurse writes something down on her clipboard and looks up to smile.

“Alright, perfect. So just change your clothes and you’re all set.”

You thank the woman as she exits the room and closes the door behind her. You hurriedly slide your pants and panties off and sit them next to your purse on the tiny table. You rush to the bed and slide onto it. The paper under you crinkles as you situate yourself. You look around and stare at the giant posters on the wall that describe the female anatomy and get lost in the very descriptive illustrations. You’re brought back to reality when there’s a slight knock on your door. You sit up straight and make sure you’re covered properly.

“Come in!” you call out.

The door slowly opens up and a head peeks in.

“Just making sure you’re decent, love.” says a familiar voice.

“Oh, I’m-”

Your words are cut short when the man fully enters into the room. Your eyes open wide as a handsome, young blonde man enters. The complete opposite of what you were expecting. He was so good looking and now, even worse, you were self conscious. Why didn’t I shave my legs today, you harshly think to yourself. The man looks at you and stares almost a second too long. You watch him shake his head as he tries to clear his mind.

“Um, hi, Miss (Y/L/N). I’m Doctor Taylor. I see here that you’re in for a check up?” he asks, not able to look up at you.

That voice. That was the voice you had heard earlier and wanted to see the face behind it. Now you did and you were not disappointed. This man so gorgeous that it made your cheeks burn and you know that he noticed.

“Um,” you clear your throat, causing him to look up. “Yeah. My check up. Yes.”

He looks at you with those big blue eyes and you can’t look away. How in the world was this man a gynecologist and not a full time model? Why are you so flustered right now? Stop thinking about this! Doctor Taylor nods his head and places your chart on the counter. He grabs a few latex gloves and slides them on. He walks back over to you and licks his lips.

“If you can just lay back and place your feet onto the sternums.” he half whispers.

You stare at him as you lean back and spread your legs. He glances over at you and tenses his jaw as you spread them. You take in a breath as you place your feet in the sternums.

“So, Miss (Y/L/N),” he starts.

“You can call me (Y/N).” you say, looking at him.

Roger freezes and smirks to you.

“So, (Y/N), you seem nervous.”

Your eyes open slightly at his bluntness.

“Oh, um. I don’t know…” you say fast.

Roger smiles and sits down on a stool.

“Guess I’ve never had a gynecologist so hot before.” you say before you can catch yourself.

You freeze and can’t believe you actually just said that out loud. Roger smirks once again and looks up to you, watching your cheeks turn red.

“Well,” he starts. “Guess I haven’t had a patient as beautiful as you.” he says quickly, suddenly realizing the words falling from his lips.

Now it’s his turn for his cheeks to burn red. You bite your lip and feel a sudden burst of confidence hit you.

“Bet you say that to all your patients.” you joke.

Roger takes in a breath and half laughs.

“Only the ones I put my fingers in.” he says with a quick wink.

Fuck. That one made something dark in your stomach rise. Oh no. You felt your heat starting to get wet. No, no, no! Not right now! Not here! You squeeze your legs together and Roger notices. He clears his throat and scoots closer to you on the stool. He brings himself in front of your legs and watches you closely.

“Well,” you start. “Now I know why you have so many good reviews online.” you tease.

Roger suddenly feels his cock twitch in his pants as he catches sight of your panties on the table in the corner. He couldn’t get horny right now. That was so inappropriate. He attempts to clear his head, but that doesn’t help.

“Good thing you read them.” he says back, another wink. “Alright, I’m just gonna have you, um, spread your legs for me, doll.” he says quietly.

You bite your lip and open them up, feeling cool air hit you. Roger’s hand reaches towards you and he pauses.

“Just gonna check you now. Gonna insert a finger in you.”

You bite your lip and stare up at the ceiling, awaiting for it. Suddenly there’s a brush against your heat and a finger lingers at your entrance. You hold your breath as he slowly pushes it into you. You hold back a moan, but a heavy breath escapes you and it doesn’t go unnoticed by Roger. You were so wet and slick around his covered fingers. He knew what arousal was, and this was definitely it. He was so attracted to you, he couldn’t help his next actions. He could tell you liked him too.

“I’m gonna add a second finger, alright?” he asks, his pants extremely tight.

You nod fast and squeeze your eyes shut. Roger suddenly slides in a second finger and this time you moan. You don’t mean to, but it happens. Roger pauses his movements and your eyes fly open. Okay, you think to yourself. He definitely heard that. Your heart is beating fast as you lie there motionless. Suddenly, Roger slides his fingers even deeper into you and slightly curls them. You don’t hold back your moan this time and bite your lip.

“Doctor Taylor,” you gasp out.

“Call me Roger.” he whispers.

You grip the paper beside you as it crinkles up.

“Roger… I, um…”

“Do you want me to stop?” he asks, almost disappointed.

But his disappointment subsides when you breathe out a fast no. He smiles and curls his fingers once again. Your hospital gown had risen up and he could see your heat. It was glistening with your juices. Juices that were now dripping onto the paper under you. His crotch ached as you try to catch your breath. Just then, Roger adds another finger. This time you buck your hips forward and pause. Roger quickly slides them out of you and you take in a deep calm breath.

“(Y/N)-” he goes to apologize to you.

“Do you by chance want to fuck me as bad as I want to fuck you?” you ask, sitting up on your elbows to look at him.

Your face had suddenly turned very serious as you look him up and down. Roger gulps and a smile slowly forms on his face.

“You’re a blunt girl, aren’t ya?” he asks.

You smirk and shrug.

“Not every day my gyno is a super hot guy. I’m also really good at knowing what I want.” you say. “And right now, I really, really want you. As bad as that sounds.”

You look down at the huge bulge in his pants and smile.

“I’m so fucking happy you said that.” he says, walking closer. “Been thinking it this whole bloody time.”

You smirk and watch as his eyes look at your now very exposed lower half.

“On your back. Spread your legs.”

You listen to what he says. Roger sits back down on his stool and peels off his gloves, tossing them to the floor. He runs his hand over your thighs slowly as he stares at your heat.

“I never do this.” he says low. “Never.”

“Good, because neither do I.”

Rog smirks up to you then lowers his head, attaching his lips directly to your swollen clit. You moan and place your hand over your mouth. The feeling of his tongue swirl around your overly sensitive nub was amazing. You wanted this man from the moment you heard his bloody voice, and now his head was between your legs. Some kind of doctor appointment this is. You grab his hair with your free hand and pull harshly. Roger moans against you and you gasp at the vibrations.

“You taste so fucking good.” he whispers against you.

“Feels so fucking good.” you reply back.

You feel your legs begin to shake and you didn’t want to cum just yet.

“Wait! Not yet!” you cry out, but not too loudly.

The fact anyone could walk through that door was almost exciting to you. Roger backs away and wipes his mouth off.

“I just really wanna know how you feel.” he confesses.

You feel your heart beat fast as you grin at him. He suddenly stands up and looks down at you.

“On your feet. We only have five minutes left.”

You sit up and slide off of the bed. Roger cups your face and begins kissing you harshly. You can taste yourself on his tongue. You moan into him as he trails his hands on your lower back and squeezes your bare butt.

“Turn around and bend over.” he whispers.

You spin around quickly and lean yourself over the edge of the bed. Roger’s behind you as he rubs his fingers up your folds.

“I never do this.” he repeats himself as he pulls down his pants, freeing his hard cock.

“I know,” you laugh. “You said that.”

Roger spreads your legs even more and begins rubbing himself up and down on your wet heat, coating himself.

“I know. Just making sure you know.”

He continues rubbing and then pauses.

“I’m gonna fuck you hard and quick, got it?” he whispers.

You lean forward even more and wiggle your butt at him. He lets out a low growl and without warning, slams himself into you. You go to yell out, but his hand is brought to your mouth and covers it. Roger wasn’t joking. He was fucking you hard and fast. Giving you no time to adjust to him. He slams into you and doesn’t stop. He angles his hips and thrusts once more, hitting your sweet spot each time. Your eyes roll in the back of your head as he repeatedly hits it.

“Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck.” you mumble into his hand.

“I’m gonna cum.” he whispers, his voice shaky.

You feel him twitch inside of you. His other hand grips your hip to help roll yourself onto him. Roger leans his chest into your back and his heavy breathing turns you on even more. What were you doing? You come in to get a check up, and now you’re fucking your doctor. Guess you can cross this one off your bucket list.

“You feel so fucking good.” he moans out. “Who made you this wet again?” he teasingly asks.

“Y-You.” you mumble in his hand.

He smirks and continues ramming into you.

“I’m… I’m gonna cum. Where do you want me to cum?” he asks quickly, removing his hand.

“On my- Ah, shit! On my face!” you say fast.

Just then you orgasm hits you out of nowhere and hard. Roger replaces his hand over your mouth as you bite it. Your legs shake fast and your whole body convulses underneath him.

“Good girl. Good girl.” he praises you.

You come down from your high as Roger still slams into you. His thrusts become sloppier.

“I’m about… I’m about to cum! Fuck! Here I go!” he whispers out.

He pulls out of you and you drop to your knees. You look up to him and open your mouth wide, your tongue darting out. He looks down at you and watching you on your knees, ready for his cum to fill your mouth, is what pushed him over the edge. Roger jerked himself off a few more times and suddenly his seed spurts out of him and all over your mouth and tongue. You close your eyes and allow the warm liquid to run down your throat. Roger’s body shakes as his eyes roll back. He jerks once more and it’s done. You close your mouth and swallow all of him. Roger catches his breath and his eyes are hooded. He watches you stand back up and wipe your mouth off.

“Shit…” he whispers as he zips his pants back up.

“Best doctor appointment ever. Now I know why you have so many good reviews.” you say with a wink, causing Roger to laugh loudly.

He walks up to you and smiles.

“That was amazing. Thank you.” he says, moving a piece of hair out of your face. “Will I see you in another six months, or?” he asks, looking a bit sad.

“I was thinking about making my appointments weekly.” you say causing him to smile. “Or... You could just take me out to dinner.”

Roger smirks and leans his face awfully close to yours.

“As long as I get to do that again.”

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[jenosweave]

going to hogwarts w/ jaemin !

requested by anon!

talented. brilliant. incredible. amazing. show stopping. spectacular. never the same. totally unique.

basics

house: gryffindor

year: 3

patronus: dolphin

favorite class: defense against the dark arts

extra info: promotes the welfare of muggle-borns and half bloods by writing speeches and speaking before different executives among the department of magic. is also in knitting club so he can make his friends cute matching sweaters

personality

the nicest boy you could ever meet

is really just so caring

never lets anyone sit alone during lunch and always invites over kids to sit with him and his friends

stands up against discrimination

a bi icon but you didn’t hear that from me

countless rumors of him dating jeno that he “can neither confirm nor deny”

jeno denies it

has friends in every house

everyone likes him, it’s hard not to there is one exception but we’ll get to that

writes really sweet encouraging notes for his friends to find when they’re stressed over a test

everyone wonders why he’s not a huff bc he’s so sweet and cares so much

but then he threatens to beat someones ass after insulting a muggle born and everyone’s reminded he’s super bold and brave

has challenged some dumbass bitches to a couple duels

is undefeated

the dueling club leader BEGS him to join but with knitting club and all his studies? i think the fuck not!

kinda clingy with his friends

has cuddled with all his roommates before

soft baby

warms the hearts of all his teachers

a really good student tbh

relationship

les get it

basically, one day

jaemin really wasn’t feeling all too confident on a test everyone was gonna have in defense against the dark arts the following week

so he went to the class to beg his teacher to re-explain a concept to him that he couldn’t understand even after a fucking 20 min discussion abt it

his plan was to go during lunch and harass his teacher then

so, he set off during lunch and surprisingly found the door to be unlocked as normally he has to BEAT on the door to get his teacher to open it

and that’s where he found YOU

wand in hand

shaking wildly

with a fucking butterfly in front of you

and you struggling to cast the spell riddikulus

he BURST out laughing and caused his presence to be known

the teacher noticed him and placed the boggart back in the wardrobe and you were BRIGHT ASS RED

this super cute gryffindor just saw that you’re scared of BUTTERFLIES it was so embarrassing

and from that point on jaemin basically harassed you everytime he saw you

he called you “butterfly” and deadass won’t leave you alone and his friends and your friends always question you two about it and you choose NOT to say what happened

“y/n omg when did you meet that cute gryffindor? whats his name?”

“jaemin??? butterfly???? wtf?????”

and eventually it kinda dies down but he still makes little faces at you when yall see each other in the hallways or in between classes

you kinda wanna like talk to him... but he just really intimidates you.... like hes so pretty and funny and sweet and that just scares the shit out of you

so... you decide to take a different route and kinda... ask the defense against the dark arts teacher for a tutor bc you’re f*iling and need a pick me up

maybe you request jaemin omo but you BEG him not to tell jaemin that bc you’re like INTO him into him and you don’t wanna be weird or seem weird lol hahah

so the professor called yall into his office to discus it w/ yall (jaemin got fucking SCARED bc he thought yall were abt to get expelled for the teasing and almost shat himself 👇🤪👇)

and when he explained the situation jaemin was secretly like really happy

and you knew the teasing would worsen but you didnt really regret your request bc jaemins cute and funny!!!1!

the next day yall met in the library and it was highkey awkward

like yall just avoided eye contact and kinda sat there but you decided to break the silence

“um,,,,” your sudden words made him shoot up to look at you “how are you uh,,,.. liking dada so far?”

and unbeknownst to you... a beast was unleashed

but you found it oddly endearing how his eyes frantically searched the room as to figure out how to make his thought coherent and how his smile shown through his words and ESPECIALLY how his hands flailed around as he spoke

it made you deadass uwu and giggle and you guys just talked for hours and hours

like yall didnt get shit done mood

and like jaemin was like HIGHKEY so cute and it made your heart beat at a million beats and it didnt help that yall kinda became inseparable after that took place

like you two were so compatible and alike that like being with other people was so..... weird

not to mention that all the time you spent with the boy helped you catch feelings like drake omo XD

he made your heart race and you couldnt just like all of sudden tell him so you push it to the back of your mind for now

until his friends lowkey start hinting that he likes you like at least jeno tries to be subtle... hyuck just blurts it out

“hey y/n! lovely morning we’re having! oh and btw, jaemin likes u! see you in potions!”

so now that his friends have been hinting at it, you start getting like..,,,, really flustered around him

like you constantly blush and are at a loss for words when he hugs you now

like UGH feelings suck

soon, christmas rolls around and you weren’t able to spend it with your relatives :( so you had to stay at hogwarts and kinda just hang around

but then!!! before all your friends left (a lot of jaemins friends were now your friends too lmao) hyuck deadass whispered in your ear

“jaemin is staying here during christmas too for certain reasons uwu have fun!!”

and then he ran away skxjsjc

the days leading up until christmas,

you spent a lot of your time studying but rarely any of it with jaemin :(

it kinda sucked bc you were having withdrawals from not seeing your bestest friend

however! you finally ran into him where he was for the past couple days you had no clue and he asked if you two could spend christmas together :(

obviously you agreed and thus you counted down the next couple days until christmas finally arrived

you two planned on eating breakfast together and then was when you would exchange gifts !!!!

nervous doesnt even begin to describe how you were feeling bitch ooOjdjd

you saw him already sitting at the gryffindor table with a big ass bag and when he waved at you??? with that big ass smile on his face????? oh my GOD!!!!!!!! butterflies!!!!!!!!!!!

you felt kinda self conscious since your gift bag was literally a fifth the size of his, but you carried on and sat at the empty space across from him

you guys ate and caught up on what had been going on (why he had been afk for fucking days)

and when that topic was finally brought up he let out a sigh and reached for the gift bag and took a woolly sweater out and handed you what remained

“now! open it!!”

and in there was a pastel yellow sweater with the word ‘yes’ knitted in black

uhhhh???? you were so confused???? what does yes mean????? and right when you looked up to ask, jaemin pulled on the other sweater he took out of the bad and put it on himself

it was the same overall pastel yellow with black text... but the words were different and your jaw DROPPED

‘will you go out with me?’

BITCH YOU WERE SO SHOOK YOU ALMOST STARTED CRYING LIKE OH MY GOOOOOOOD

and that was when the power couple of hogwarts started

everyones been knew you two liked eat other hyuck said “its abt damn time”

anyway!!!!! yall are so cute like he walks you to class and even the teachers think you guys are just the cutest thing ever and when you told your friends???? they were SCREAMING like you got such an amazing guy UGH your mind

all i’m saying is... dating jaemin is like dating your really clingy and attractive best friend and you aint mad abt it

uwu that’s all for now!!! if you’d like to request another member.. our ask box is open!

[scuzmunkie]

Run, Little Rabbit, Run: Chapter 9

A/N: My darling little pumpkins!! How I love you so!! Thank you so much for coming in this journey with me!! I’ve made some amazing friends along the way and I appreciate each and everyone of my followers!! You guys have no idea how emotional I get when I read your comments!! Truly, from the bottom of my heart, thank you all so much!! And now for chapter 9! You know the drill, lmk if you’d like to be added to the tag list and if there are any mistakes!! Enjoy! Smooches!! Baron Corbin x OFC Word Count: 2000+ Warnings: language and moderate sexy times. (I suck at writing smut, so I don’t attempt it lol) Summary: Run, Addie, the Constable is coming for you..... +++ “Baron, I need some space.” Addie giggled, trying to gently push him away. This earned her a low growl and a soft nudge against her head. “Too bad, little rabbit, I wanna be close to you.” He rumbled. “Ok, love birds. As cute as you two are, I have a match tonight and I need to look flawless!” Alexa said giving them a mock scowl. “Watch it, pixie.” Baron growled, playfully snapping his teeth in Alexa’s direction. Addie softly bopped him on the nose with her pointer finger. “Be nice,” Addie stood on her tiptoes and pecked Baron on the lips, “I’ll see you later.” “Fine...” he mumbled against her lips, “I love you. See you tonight.” “Love you too.” Squealing when he smacked her ass as he walked away. “THAT’S RIGHT!” Alexa beamed, “Tonight’s your first change!! Ooooh, are you nervous?” “Um, a little. From what the others have told me, the first time is pretty painful.” Addie chewed her lip as she put the finishing touches on Alexa. “Michael offered to use his magic to try and dull the pain but I want to feel it all, y’know? Get an understanding of what Baron went through.” “Well, you’re a hell of a lot braver than I am. I’d spring for that magic offer faster than a jack rabbit on a date.” “Thanks for the visual.” Addie said as she grimaced. Alexa placed a loving hand on Addie’s. “You’ll be fine babe. Baron won’t let anything happen to you, he’ll be there every step of the way.” With that, she kissed  Addie’s cheek leaving a huge lipstick kiss mark. —- Baron stood in front of Addie, his nose buried in her hair. He held her small hands in his calloused ones as the night air kissed their skin. The wind blew through the trees as the leaves rustled. He could hear her heart beating faster than normal. It was natural for his little rabbit to be nervous. “Don’t worry, beautiful. I’ve got you.” He whispered as he pulled her into his arms. He loved how perfect her body fit with his. Leaning down, he kissed Addie, trying his best to calm her nerves. She happily welcomed the distraction. “Ok,” he whispered when they pulled apart, “first thing’s first, take off your clothes.” “What?” Addie squeaked out. “Don’t worry, I’ll put them in my backpack. They won’t get dirty.” He said as he nodded his head to the bag that hung from one of the handlebars of his motorcycle. It was a sweet gesture but her clothes getting dirty wasn’t what she was worried about. Although they had been together since that horrible night, they hadn’t been intimate yet. Addie still felt self conscious  about her body even tho Baron reassured her that he loved her body. Sensing her unease about shedding her clothes in front of him, Baron kissed her forehead. “Baby,” Baron murmured, “we’ve been over this, I think you’re sexy as hell. You don’t need to hide your body from me.” “No, I know... it’s not that, well not totally that. I got sick in my teens and I’ve only really been with one guy. We had math together. It was just one time and it wasn’t great.” She rolled her eyes when Baron growled at the mention of another guy touching what was his. “Oh stop that. What I’m trying to tell you is that I’m not super experienced and not used to people seeing me naked.” “Oh babe,” his voice low and husky, “I don’t give a shit about how experienced you are. When the time comes I’ll take care of you...” he buried his face in the crook of her neck, “I’ll make you feel things you’ve only dreamed of.” He gently bit her sensitive skin, “I’ll worship this gorgeous body so good, you’ll be a whimpering mess begging me to never stop.” He pulled back and kissed her lips then her forehead. By now Addie felt like she couldn’t breathe. She wanted to let go and lose control around Baron. But there was something that had to be done first. Taking a deep breath, Addie backed up, reached for the hem of her shirt and slowly undressed under the light of the full moon. Once she was completely bare before her alpha, she looked at him for further instruction. Baron was currently in a daze as he stared at his mate’s voluptuous, perfect body. His wolf was practically biting at the chops to take her right then and there. Shaking his head, he quickly removed his shirt knowing that the skin to skin contact will help her through her change. He walked towards Addie, pulled the hair tie from her braid and brushed his fingers through her hair. “This’ll be easier if we’re sitting, ok?” He watched as she nervously nodded her head as she sat on the ground. Sitting behind her, Baron wrapped his arms around her soft tummy and pulled her between his bent legs, against his chest. He kissed her shoulder where his mark was, pride running through his body when he felt her shiver under his touch. “Relax baby, breath with me.” Closing her eyes, she let her head fall back on his shoulder as she placed her arms on his. “You’re going to feel a dull heat throughout your body and it’s going to intensify. Do you feel it?” “Y-Yeah, it’s not that ba- OH! I lied!” Her nails dug into Baron’s skin. “It feels like I’m on fire, it hurts Baron!” She winced and whimpered in as it got worse. Baron tightened his hold on her while kissing her mark again, trying to ease her pain. He knew that what was about to come would be the most excruciating pain she’d ever feel in her life. “I know, baby, I know. I need you to listen, next you’re body is going to morph into an entirely different being.” He murmured against her ear, “Your bones will break and reform into your wolf. It’s going to hurt but I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.” “I’m scared, I don’t know if I can-!” She was cut off by her own scream as her back arched as they both heard that pop of her first broken bone. Just as she was about to scream in agony, Baron sunk his now sharp teeth into her shoulder. Addie moaned in pleasure and pain as her body leaned into Baron’s. He did all he could to distract her from the anguish that was tearing through her entire body. Unable to hold onto Addie anymore, Baron jumped back as her body changed into a breathtaking red wolf. Finally able to catch her breath, Addie looked at Baron with big eyes. She tried to stand, but wasn’t yet used to this new form. Her head felt like it was going to explode as all of her senses felt like they had just been cranked to eleven. “Easy babe, take your time.” Baron whispered as he slowly approached his luna. “It’s going to take some getting used to.” He helped Addie to her feet, running his hands over her fur once she was able to stand on her own. He stroked her fur, marveling at how soft it was. Unable to stop himself, he leaned into her side lying his head on her side as his hands continued to pet her soft coat. Closing his eyes, he listened to her heartbeat, never taking it for granted as he thought about the night he had almost lost Addie. It had been almost a full month since then and he made sure to tell her everyday how much he loved her. Feeling antsy, Addie gently shook him off. Her paws started to fidget, like they needed to dig into the earth while she raced through the trees. ‘Patience, my dear.’ A voice said in her mind, causing Addie to yip in surprise. ‘What?! Who are you?!’ Addie asked, trying not to freak out. ‘I’m your wolf.’ Addie recalled Baron trying to explain this to her, though she didn’t feel prepared at all for the real thing. ‘Relax and trust our alpha, he’ll take care of us.’ Baron stood in front of Addie, running his fingers through the fur around her neck. “You are so beautiful.” He whispered as he leaned her head down so he could place his forehead on hers. Stepping back, Baron took off the rest of his clothes and took on his wolf form as well. Addie watched as Baron crouched, his body morphing into a dark grey wolf that easily stood a foot and a half taller than Addie’s. Walking towards her, Baron ran his muzzle along hers, scenting her. Once he was satisfied with his work, he kicked her neck then playfully nipped at her. Wanting to be closer to him, Addie nuzzled under Baron’s neck. Nudging her head with his nose, Baron tilted his head towards the open woods. He started to run from her, barking for her to follow. Addie didn’t need to be told twice as she took off after him. When they had their fill of running under the night sky, Addie and Baron laid on the ground near his bike. Sensing that the sun would be up in a few hours, Baron stood and changed back to human. “Turning back into human is a lot easier. Close your eyes and picture your human form.” He instructed when she too stood and tilted her head to the side. Closing her eyes, Addie did as she was told. Although it took some time, she was finally back to her old self. She opened her eyes and looked at Baron. He looked so majestic under the light of the full moon. Closing the gap between them, Addie used Baron’s shoulders to pull him down into a heated kiss. Growling, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her flush against his body. Her plush body felt like heaven against his hard body. Pulling away, Baron quickly ripped open his backpack and pulled out a large blanket and laid it on the ground. Sitting on the blanket, Baron reached out a hand towards his beautiful Addie. Once she was in his arms, he laid her on her back as he hovered over her as he nestled between her luscious thighs. She cupped his face pulling him down for another kiss. Moving from her lips, down her jaw, finally reaching her shoulder, he left open mouthed kisses on her skin. He bit her skin as she dug her nails up his back, causing him to growl against her neck. Her thighs tightened around Baron as she ground her hips into his. “Little rabbit, if you keep that up I can’t guarantee that I’ll be able to control myself.” He growled against her ear. “Maybe I want to lose control with you.” She purred, pulling back to look into his now glowing eyes. “I need to hear you say it Adelina.” He said, a cocky smirk on his lips as he watched her shiver at the sound of her name on his tongue. Growling, she pulled him by the back of his neck, crashing her lips against his as she bit his bottom lip. “Take me, alpha.” She said as she stared into his eyes. Letting out a roar, he held her tightly by her hair as he marked the delicate skin of her neck with his teeth. She dragged her nails along his spine as she arched into him. Under the stars, Baron kept true to his word, reveling in every gasp, whimper and moan he drew from her as he showed her body the love she deserved. At the height of their love making, Baron stared into Addie’s eyes. “Tell me you love me.” Baron growled out. “M-More than anything.” She panted out as she bared her neck to him, a little tip Ruby gave her. Throwing his head back, Baron howled at the full moon then sunk his teeth into her neck as Addie cried out his name. Collapsing on her soft body, Baron held Addie close as they basked in each other’s afterglow. A single tear fell from Baron’s eye as he stared at the beautiful gift the moon goddess bestowed upon him. Stroking her hair as she let out a small yawn, Baron pulled a few things from his bag and gently cleaned their bodies. He pulled her to her feet and helped her get dressed then throwing his own clothes on. Packing everything back up, Addie took the bag from his hands and put it on her back. With ease, Baron lifted Addie and placed her on his bike then mounting it himself. Wrapping her arms around his torso, kissing his back between his shoulder blades. “I love you.” She whispered as she rested her chin on his shoulder. Baron turned his head and kissed her cheek. Staring into her eyes, Baron leaned back and exposed his neck to his luna, a sign of full submission and respect. Addie softly bit his neck, shivering as he moaned under her teeth. When she pulled her teeth back, she kissed the small mark she left on his skin. “It’s official now.” Baron whispered. “You’re my luna, my equal, my moon. Mine as I am yours.” “Yours as you are mine.” Addie whispered. “Forever.” He said as he kickstarted his bike and made their way back to the hotel. “Forever.” She whispered back as the wind cooled her heated skin. The Moon Goddess smiled down as she watched her wolves start their new like together.

+++

Darling Little Pumpkins:

@haven-raven012591 @kittysilver86 @calwitch @hanaslay @feathers-and-flesh-and-wrestling @melinatedmuse @neversatisfiedgirl @empress-with-the-crown @houndsofjxstice @thegloriousdisaster @lost-in-the-stories @wrestlingfae @captainwinterwriter @imagine-all-the-fandoms @hardyfangirl3 @team-elias @yndaree @briqueenofthenorth @belsoleleann @finnbalorsbabygirl @nonnirenea @scarlettquinn

[queenofcats17]

Hi! I just thought of an interesting prompt idea because of my new story. Do you think you could write a story where Bendy runs into Allison and Tom because they happened to be in the area and he tells them what Joey did? And then meanwhile Henry is trying to process what just happened and has a breakdown, while Joey is just being his regular evil self and stuff? (Even I want to punch him. Lol) Sorry for the angsty prompts! You always write them so well! 😅

Sorry this took so long. 

Bendy continued kicking and screaming all the way to the Heavenly Toys Department, where the Searchers promptly dumped him and left. And so the little demon was alone. Not for the first time. Bendy curled up on the ground, continuing to scream and sob at the top of his lungs. He’d been bottling up his emotions for quite a while now and needed to let them out. He wasn’t allowed to be sad or upset around Joey, so he had to wait until he was alone to express his emotions. Joey liked the idea of a family, but he didn’t know how to deal with an upset child. So he didn’t. He just pushed Bendy away and made Bendy feel as though he was being a nuisance. Bendy knew from the other members of the studio that he was not, in fact, a nuisance, but Joey certainly knew how to make him feel worthless. So he cried when he was alone. It was this crying that led Allison and Tom to the little demon.

They’d been in the area, doing their usual food run when they’d heard the crying. It wasn’t uncommon to hear people crying given where they were, but this was different. This was a child’s crying. And there was only one child in the studio. Allison and Tom exchanged a glance. 

“We need to go see what’s wrong,” Allison said. 

“He might not be alone,” Tom argued. “It might be a trap.” Allison gave him a deadpan look. 

“Don’t give me that look. You know Drew wouldn’t hesitate to use the kid if it suited his needs.”

“Let’s just check it out.” Allison sighed. “If it’s a trap, we get out.” Tom still didn’t like this idea, but he knew he wasn’t going to talk Allison out of this. So he followed her out to where Bendy was. Bendy was melting, forming a puddle around himself of ink. His form was still stable, just getting sort of…goopy. 

“Bendy? Sweetheart?” Allison called out. Bendy looked up abruptly, quickly trying to gather himself together and pretend he hadn’t been crying. 

“Oh, um, hi Miss Allison.” He said, forcing a smile. 

“What’s wrong?” Allison asked, walking over to kneel beside him. Tom followed tentatively. The little demon did seem to be alone. And he was genuinely upset. Bendy’s lip quivered at Allison’s question. 

“He got Henry.” He said, lowering his head. “Joey got Henry.”

“Oh, Bendy.” Allison gathered the demon in her arms, allowing him to cry into her chest. Tom’s shoulders slumped. He’d heard Henry was back in the studio, but he’d hoped the other man would be able to get out again. Tom had never had any belief that Henry could save them and fix all their problems, but he’d at least hoped the boy could save Bendy.

“He got Henry and he wouldn’t let me try and help Henry!” Bendy sobbed into Allison’s chest. “It’s not fair!”

“Joey doesn’t play fair.” Allison sighed, patting Bendy’s back. 

“It’s not fair.” Bendy sniffled.

“I know,” Allison said. “I know.”

“What am I gonna do?” Bendy asked, looking up at her. Allison pursed her lips. She wanted to tell Bendy that everything was going to be alright. She wanted to make the little demon feel like he had some semblance of control. But she didn’t have a good answer. She didn’t know how to fix this.

“You’ll get through this.” Tom stepped in. His voice was gruff, and not terribly comforting, but Bendy took comfort in it all the same.

“Really?” He asked quietly.

“I’m not going to tell you it’ll be easy,” Tom said. “And I don’t know how to fix this. But you’ll get through it. You’re not alone. Never let Drew make you feel like you’re alone.” Tom had met a lot of men like Joey Drew in his life, and he hated every single one of them. They preyed on the weak and the vulnerable, making them feel as though there was no one in the world who would love them, making them feel alone and scared. Tom didn’t trust people. But he’d be damned if he was going to let this child feel that way. 

“You’re not alone.” Allison agreed. “No matter what happens, we’ll be here for you. Me, Tom, Sammy, Wally. We’re all here for you.” Bendy smiled a little. 

“Thanks.” He said quietly.

“You’re welcome.” Allison kissed his head.

.

Meanwhile, Henry was still with Joey. Joey had been cooing over him for the past half an hour, stroking his ‘hair’ and telling him how much he loved him. Henry had only really been half listening. Even under the corruption’s influence, he was trying to process what had happened. Bendy had been there. Bendy had been trying to help him. And Joey had sent the little demon away. Joey had been deliberately keeping him from his son. Henry was distraught within the confines of the ink. Bendy was his son. 

“Ben…dy…” He rasped, tears beginning to spring up in his eye. “Ben…dy…! Where is…Bendy?” Joey shook his head, clicking his tongue in disapproval.

“I know, I know.” Joey continued to stroke Henry’s hair. “You’re worried about him. He is your child. But he disobeyed me. He knew the rules and he broke them anyway. If I don’t discipline him, he’ll never learn his lesson.”

“Bendy!” Henry screamed, trying to pull away. “Where is my…son?!” Big inky tears trailed down his cheek.

“Sssh.” Joey wrapped his arms around him, dragging him back. Joey’s touch made the haze in Henry’s mind grow stronger, but the animator tried to fight it. He had to find Bendy. He had to find him and help him! Joey’s temper flared a bit and he held Henry tighter, making a conscious effort to exert his pull on his old friend. Henry was finding it considerably harder to resist now. 

“Ben….dy…” He sobbed, his voice growing softer. His struggles grew weaker.

“That’s right.” Joey cooed. “Everything is fine. Just calm down. You’ll get to see Bendy again.” But it would be under Joey’s supervision, of course. Eventually, Henry stopped struggling, lying limply in Joey’s arms as he cried.

“I don’t want to punish you or Bendy,” Joey said, patting Henry’s head. “You have to know that. I love both of you. I’m doing this because I love you. The world is cruel and wicked and I’m keeping you both safe here. I’m the only one you can trust, Henry. Everyone else will leave you. But me…I’ll never leave.” Henry whimpered quietly. 

“I know, this is all hard.” Joey rested his head on Henry’s, sighing heavily. “You just have to trust me, Henry. I have your best interests at heart. If I let you go, you’ll just leave like you did before. I can’t protect you if you’re not with me. I’m just trying to keep you safe.”

You’re lying! Henry screamed in his mind. You don’t love me! If you loved me, you wouldn’t do this to me!

“Henry. That’s not very nice.” Joey’s voice remained calm, but there was a distinct edge to it. “Do I need to punish you too?” Henry let out another small whimper, drawing into himself. He wanted to think that Joey wouldn’t hurt him but, well, the corruption was proof enough that Joey was willing to do whatever it took to keep Henry beside him.

“You’ll be a good boy for me, won’t you, Henry?”

[insarations]

these are actually hella fucking cute y’all

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? more cereal

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? oh yes :) but gotta  get me some hot chocolate or blanket

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? usually just a scrap of paper or whatevers close

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? i put soy milk and sugar in my coffee....just sugar in tea

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? ya :/ well at least if my mouth is open...I have terrible teeth

6: do you keep plants? no

7: do you name your plants? noo lol

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? painting/drawing/crafting..sometimes writing or poetry

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? very much

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? usually side, sometimes back

11: what's an inner joke you have with your friends? too many to name

12: what's your favorite planet? hmm...never thought about it strangely. saturn for looks. but mars cause idk..it holds the most possibility

13: what's something that made you smile today? my cats

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? uhhh....idk

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! A day on Venus is actually longer than a year on Venus... wrap your head around that ;)

16: what's your favorite pasta dish? ooooh all of them lol but probably lasagna... ooh or alfredo

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? just darker...dark brown or black

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up when i made us play hide n seek in a hotel room and i hid behind a curtain. or when i peed on my friends foot cause she got stung by a jellyfish XD

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? I used to :/ I dont' really anymore..probably should

20: what's your favorite eye color? um idk really it depends on the person..I usually like brown or blue. not that green isn't nice but again depends on the person lol

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that's been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. ugh I really don't use bags or purses or anything like that much. currently my black vans drawstring

22: are you a morning person? nah, never will be. i'm used to getting up early but still hate it

23: what's your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? SLEEP

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? yes..a few people

25: what's the weirdest place you've ever broken into? umm i dont think ive broken into anywhere

26: what are the shoes you've had for forever and wear with every single outfit? i got rid of all my own shoes but the ones ive had a while i wear the most are my black slipon vans

27: what's your favorite bubblegum flavor? mint

28: sunrise or sunset? sunset

29: what's something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? only she could do it, cant even explain lol

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? more than a few times

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. I LOVE SOCKS lol absolutely not all white socks. I like fun patterned socks..especially my vans no shows... sometimes sleep with them on

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. oh gosh dont let me start

33: what's your fave pastry? uggghh too many. recently something amazing I tried... lobster tails from carlos bakery. but really..any pastry lol

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? lots of them. the main one I can think of is a small little grungy horse named Wickee lol...got him at this amusement park called Wickee Watchee... idk where he is atm :/

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? ooooooh yesssss...from time to time

36: which band's sound would fit your mood right now? 21 pilots

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? I mean I like it clean.... but it's messy most the time anyways lol

38: tell us about your pet peeves! ugh so many. the #1 thing probably is when I'm walking like in a store and someone just stops right in front of me..like i'm tryna get somewhere please move haha but otherwise I just had selfish spoiled people and attitudes and people who think they're better than everyone else

39: what color do you wear the most? black and gray

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what's it's story? does it have any meaning to you? um honestly I don't have any jewelry besides my liprings. There is this necklace that was my grandmas but I don't really wear it anymore

41: what's the last book you remember really, really loving? It's called Pawn by Robin Roseau

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! Starbucks. it's amazing. it's life. that is all.

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? this girl

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? um hmm on and off lately and I think i'm getting there again...but probably really completely like...last spring

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? as much and often as I can

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. oh you don't want me to do that

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? donald trump. oh food. hahahahah omg. i thought it said thing. hahahaha. i cant even answer now.

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? roaches. yes still same. I HATE THEM

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? eh neither like or dislike..rarely ever buy cds never records. But I did recently buy the Gwen Stefani Christmas album ;)

50: what's an odd thing you collect? nothing really odd. oh well.... unique boxes. I guess thats strange lol

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? so many songs.

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? uh hmm.. probably the spongebob mocking one lol

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? honestly..dont kill me...no

54: who's the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? myself XD

55: what's the most dramatic thing you've ever done to prove a point? gotten out of the car and walked a mile home XD

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? just being genuine and truthful and sweet and trying to be funny even if you're not really

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? BEAUTIFUL. I didnt actually listen but I did in my head. BEAUTIFUL SONG

58: who's the wine mom and who's the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? uhhhh..... dont really have a group of friends XD

59: what's your favorite myth? hmm too much thinking

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? depends, most the time...the Footprints poem

61: what's the stupidest gift you've ever given? the stupidest one you've ever received? given um...idk I used to get a buncha stuff from the dollar store for my fam every year lol received? a rock from my ex bf -_-

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? nah not really a juice person

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? yes organized

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? black

65: is there anyone you haven't seen in a long time who you'd love to hang out with? yesss....

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? uhhh eh..not for me

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? either calm or sad or sleepy or a combo

68: what's winter like where you live? it's florida. not usually cold. this week is as cold as it gets...low is like 38 but usually it doesnt even get there

69: what are your favorite board games? clue, monopoly is alright too

70: have you ever used a ouija board? no

71: what's your favorite kind of tea? not huge on tea but I like mint, or something fruity like berry or lemon or peach

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you'll forget it? with certain things

73: what are some of your worst habits? leaving drinks or bottles half finished out or like letting my room get messy

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. funny. sarcastic. sometimes an asshole. good time. gorgeous. fun.

75: tell us about your pets! They're two cats, sister, Lamb and Rue...they're 2 and 1/2 years old..and sweet and mischevious and fluffy and soft and cuteeee  and I love them more than anything

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren't? not really

77: pink or yellow lemonade? dont really like lemonade much but they dont make much a difference to me

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? fanclub :)

79: what's one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? wrote a song for me

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? white..nah I didnt choose

81: describe one of your friend's eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. honestly my minds going black lol im tired

82: are/were you good in school? yes for the most part..had my moments but overall good

83: what's some of your favorite album art? so many I could name. coldplays is always really colorful and abstracty. and imagine dragons.

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? already have two. want a lot more..too much to name and i dont even know still what all i want

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? nah

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? YAS. many. but first came to mind, Skillets Rise

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? Silver Linings Playbook. Paper Towns. Shrek. All the disney movies. Avatar. Wizard of Oz. many more

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? all of them haha... pop art, impressionism, renaissance..just all of it all special in they're own way

89: are you close to your parents? eh idk i cant explain..neither close nor distant. like we live together and talk alot but not really the close relationship as some do..im very different from them

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. Knoxville. the city I went to college in... interesting place with lots to do..best of both worlds. beautiful mountains and hills and views. but also the downtown areas are cool..lots of fun stuff

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? going to savannah ga for my bday. not sure where else yet but i'm sure there will be other places. i'd really like to go to phoenix..boston..new orleans..california..portland ugh so many places

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? CHEESE AF

93: what's the hairstyle you wear the most? just up in a bun which is boring but its too messy and long to put up with lol

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? my dad

95: what are your plans for this weekend? nothing really so far. probably will go to lunch or something with my friend

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? procrastinate

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? myer briggs- INFJ (advocate) sign- aquarius house- ravenclaw

98: when's the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? legitimately...like 3 years ago...hated it...too much walking and pain XD

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. ugh sooooooooooo many. pretty much any song by skillet or gwen stefani/no doubt recently..dusk till dawn by sia, new rules by dua lipa... also songs by ben howard..lots of indie stuff

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 5 into the future... i've already lived my past, and i've made a lot of progress...wanna jump to even more progress hopefully

[lattaescript]

To Succor a Calico Cat

Pairing: Jimin x Reader

Word Count: 4.1k

*Prompt-:“Person A and Person B are lifelong rivals and neighbors, but when an issue in the apartment building occurs, Person A ends up having to room with Person B” 

Since your days as a middle schooler in Busan, you and Jimin didn’t really share a friendly rivalry. But a certain calico cat makes your paths cross again…

“A calico cat has three colors.”

He then bitterly chuckles.

“It’s funny. I do art for a living, but I see more colors in you than in my life.”

-Artist!Jimin and Artist!Reader, Architect!Jimin InteriorDesigner! Reader feat. a very special calico cat

-I maaaay be really inaccurate with their professions but like bear with me here lol

-A lil angst…but…Fluff? Fluff. Short entry for @nightbts writing contest!

As you opened the door to the veranda, you sighed a cloud of white as you shivered from the early cold morning while clutching onto a hot cup of coffee. The neighborhood buildings as well as the flower pots and the nearby bicycles yet untouched for the day were all dyed in light orange from the sunrise. You breathed in the fresh crisp air and enjoyed the scenery when all of a sudden you heard a chuckle.

“You tryin’ to film a movie or something?”

You closed your eyes to revel in the pleasant air for just a little while longer. And then you turned to the source of the evil here to ruin your morning...yet again.

“Good morning to you, Park Jimin,” you grumbled as you tried to force a civil smile (but to no avail) to the guy leaning against the next veranda to your left.

It had been 6 months since you moved to Seoul, the heart of Korea. And it had been 6 months since you became neighbors with your archnemesis since middle school in Busan, Jimin. Park Jimin was the guy who stole your spotlight since middle school. Your parents, your teachers, and your friends were all smitten by him– him and his “creativity handed to him by God”. He took 1st place in just about everything- all the art contests your school could possibly hold, social life, and even academics. But you didn’t quite care much. He was the ingenious kid who was born to stand out, and frankly, you just wanted to enjoy the quiet student life in lieu of the bustling nature of being surrounded by the mass- or so you deeply ingrained in your heart. When Jimin was accepted into the top art university in Seoul, however, you failed to contain the jealousy you had for him. One day, I’ll be in my own place where I belong. Geniuses have it easy.

But several years later, you felt your dignity crumble as your neighbor happened to be that same Park Jimin, and that same Park Jimin happened to be working at a very famous spatial design company as an architect while you were working in a small and humble interior design firm. You really, really did not want anything to do with him after high school, but alas, fate was a cruel thing, was it not?

He seemingly didn’t change at all. His aura flaunted with confidence– rather, cockiness, and his flamboyant appearance and persona seemed to match that of his in high school. Except with time, he seemed to also grow a shadow of an adult, and as much as you hate to admit, he exuded maturity, but to everything and everyone other than you, it seems. He was so nice to the landlady of your apartment, helping her with fixing broken things around the apartment or help the elderly man who lived 4 doors down walk down the stairs. And yet, when it comes to you, he fails to lose the impertinent childish demeanor. But you were also equally as petty– maybe all the comparisons to him and you since middle school did take a toll on you.

And now, with your proximity closer than ever, you had to deal with the silent taunting that came from the occupant of the veranda next to you.

You side-eye him to see his smug look at you.

God. I hate him so much.

You hurry and head back inside to get ready for work.

But as it was, you weren’t having a field day at work either.

“Miss Y/N, you are never going to make it if you keep this up,” your boss sighs as she crinkles her nose and massages her temples. She was reviewing some ideas you came up with for a client, and clearly she wasn’t happy with it.

“I’m so sorry ma’am, but I–”

“Clearly this shows how much of an amateur you are. Our clients aren’t looking for something like this,” she waves to the file you handed her.

“This demonstrates your lack of ability to think outside the box. It’s like you grew up in a bubble. Now, bring me an actual plan next time.”

“…Yes, ma’am,” you mutter as you look down to the floor.

Your co-workers stare at you- some in pity, and some in relief it wasn’t them. At this point, you just wanted to give up and throw everything away but rent and paying back art school fees were actually a thing in life.

If the day couldn’t get any worse, as you start to head home, cold drops started to precipitate, and exponentially increased its speed.

Shit.

You didn’t bring your umbrella with you because you were too preoccupied with that damn Park Jimin to check the weather forecast.

Dammit Park Jimin this is all your fault.

As you cursed him you proceed to helplessly run, getting drenched in the freezing autumn rain anyways.

“God, I’m fucking freezing,” you shivered as you try to reach for your keys to open your door.

While you were desperately fumbling for your keys, you suddenly hear a soft whimper from below. You look down to look at the source of the sound, and next to the residue of rain dripping from your body was a small, shivering tri-color cat. You admire its coat of orange, black, and white as well as its exquisite green eyes but you found a color that did not belong. Your eyes widen at the sight of the color red.

“Oh, you poor thing, you’re bleeding!”

You bend down to the cat to check on it. It seemed like the cat could not move.

“Okay, let’s get you inside.”

You opened the door, and carefully carried the cat inside.

After you hastened to dry yourself, you placed the cat on top of a warm blanket, and proceeded to check more on it.

“Okay, it just looks like a scratch. The rain probably shocked you, huh?”

You gently swabbed at the wound with cotton wet with warm water, and the cat flinched. It weakly whimpered, gently moving its shaking paw towards you to signal its pain.

“I’m sorry. It’s gonna be over soon, just bear with me, okay?” You pet the cat softly as you try to reassure it.

After making sure the wound was cleaned, you carefully wrapped a bandage around the wound.

“There. You should be better soon!”

The cat purred in relief, and licked your hand myriad amount of times in gratitude.

“That tickles!” You giggle. You felt a heavy burden lift off your chest as your eyes soften at the cat.

You suddenly hear a ring from your bedroom.

“Oh, that’s my phone. Be right back, okay?”

After you took care of your phone call, you headed back to check up on the cat again. But there was no said cat.

“Huh?”

You looked around the entire living room. There was no sign of the calico cat.

“Huh, did it really just up and leave?”

You looked around your entire apartment twice and finally accepted that it left.

Hmm. Guess it’s fine now. Hopefully it’ll stay safe.

You scan the living room one more time and left to finish drying off.

Jimin sighs as he climbs up the stairs to his apartment. His face felt stiff from smiling the same smile for 5 hours straight at a company social dinner. Sure, he had it all– good connections, good position…but does he really have to sit in the same room with those arrogant ass middle-aged men? Those same men that mocked him with jealousy behind the scenes for being young and successful simultaneously? All he wanted was to go home, take a shower, plop on his bed and sleep. He stopped in front of his door only to be guested with a stranger.

A calico cat.

“Hmm? It’s…a cat. Haven’t seen you around here.”

The cat pleadingly meowed at him.

“Oh, you were injured…and someone took care of you, eh? But you look like you are starving though. Lemme give you something, hold on.”

Jimin then let the cat inside his abode, and he searched his fridge something soft for cats. He prepared a meal for the cat by warming up some chicken broth and crumbling pieces of bread. He set it in a bowl and placed it gently next to the cat and waited for him to eat. The cat’s pearly green eyes glittered and started nibbling quickly on the food.

“Wow, you really must have been hungry, huh,” Jimin chuckled.

Jimin stared at the cat whilst petting its royal coat of fur.

“A calico cat has three colors.”

He then bitterly chuckles.

“It’s funny. I do art for a living, but I see more colors in you than in my life.”

He then gets up, and stretches.

“Mm. I’m gonna go take a real quick shower– I really need one. Finish that up, okay?”

The cat meowed in response.

Jimin heads to the bathroom, and proceeds to take off his clothes when he turned on the water. But after an extended amount of time, the water wasn’t getting warm.

“Fuck…”

Jimin changes back into his clothes and rushes out of the bathroom.

“I gotta call the landlady– huh?”

Jimin expected the cat to still be eating the food, but instead, he found no cat and he found a completely clean bowl.

“Well. He ate that fast and he just left, didn’t he? Oh well, as long as he is fed, I guess. More importantly, the water…”

And Jimin hurriedly looked for his phone.

The next morning, you were rudely awakened by a knock on the door.

“…But it’s my day off today,” you grumble half conscious.

But the knocking incessantly continued. You reluctantly get up, pat down your hair, and trudge towards the door.

To your surprise, it was the landlady– together with Park Jimin.

“Um. Good Morning, Y/N,” the landlady hesitantly started.

“Oh, hello. What happened?”

The landlady was a fairly kind lady who usually hated intruding upon her own tenants aside from giving them occasional home cooked side dishes or cupcakes. She was that kind of lady. And when she happened to intrude upon her tenants like this, it was usually either a problem in the apartment or rent. You payed rent this month– it was most probably the former.

“Y/N, I’m so sorry to ask you this, but Jimin’s water heater has broken. Would you mind having him stay over for a while? It seems like they can’t fix it until next Tuesday, and most of the other tenants aren’t here over the weekend,” the landlady apologetically asks.

You and Jimin looked at each other.

He leans on your door, indifferently waiting for your response.

Reasonable desires to reject his stay bubbled up to the horizon- until you saw the landlady look at you in desperate hopes you’ll say otherwise.

“Listen. You. Will sleep on the sofa.” You succinctly hissed to Jimin while he pushed his bags inside.

“Fair enough.”

Jimin immediately swished passed you and plopped on the sofa.

“I’m only going to stay here to sleep and take a shower here for a couple of days. I’m busy after all.”

“Are you implying that I’m not?” You scoffed.

Jimin looked at you with his eyebrows raised.

“Nah. Just thought, you’d appreciate me not being here often.”

You paused your inner rage for a short second. Where was his usual rudeness?

“Oh…well no I–”

“By the way, do you have food in your fridge? I’m starving. Or do you usually get take-out? Mind getting something for me? I pulled an all-nighter last night and didn’t eat dinner.”

Ah. There it is.

You exhale in exasperation. This was going to be a very long couple of days…

True to his words, the next day, he was barely in your presence. This only served to fuel your irritation more since it screamed out the comparison between the difference of working status between the two of you.

You sighed for what seemed like the hundredth sigh and take out your laptop.

“Well. People who aren’t geniuses have to work hard. I’m busy too, y’know,” you spoke to a non-existent shadow of Jimin you conjured.

Jimin came back home at around the evening, but he came back earlier than you had since you went to the market to get groceries.

You come back to see Jimin making himself at home while he munches on a bag of chips on the sofa while watching some kind of variety show.

“Oh. Welcome home. Did you happen to get the groceries I asked you to get?”

“Yes. I did,” you grunt as you struggle to put the groceries down on the kitchen table.

“Oh? You did?” His eyes widen.

You close your eyes in frustration. His surprise in his completion of his request irritated you more than the request itself.

“Jimin– as much as I honestly dislike you, you’re still a guest. And as long as you are a guest, I have to make sure your stay here is damn great, 10/10 would recommend. Okay?”

Jimin stares at you for what seemed like years. His face stilled until it finally broke out into a wide grin.

And that was the moment your heart skipped a beat.

What…the hell? Nuh-uh. No way. No way in hell did I just think he was-

“Okay. Then in order to make my stay great, 10/10, you wanna join me?”

He pats on the seat of the sofa next to him.

“This show’s really funny.”

“Huh? But I have to make din–”

“Please? For a guest?”

Ohhh shit. What have I done?

You could not focus on the show at all. The parts you did listen to were all drowned out by his laughter. But you were just mainly confused to why you were watching this with him. You stared at Jimin who was so busily invested in the show. And you wondered- who really was Park Jimin? The more you thought about it, the more it became a wonder. You didn’t really know much about him after all. The way his cheeks touched his eyes as he laughed made you feel something. It was less closer to the irritation that you felt for him during the past few years.

The entire time was awkward- at least for you. And you felt your fatigue hit you as you yawned. You quickly cover your mouth hoping that Jimin didn’t notice, but it seemed like you were too late as Jimin started snickering.

“You tired?”

“Yeah– cause of somebody. It’s getting late, I should start preparing–”

“Lemme do it.”

“Huh?” Your eyes widen in shock.

“I know how to cook. I’ve been living by myself for quite a while now. Besides, I was the one who made you watch it with me. There are no rules that guests can’t pay their price, right?”

He smirks at your speechlessness. “Pasta, right? I saw the groceries earlier. I’ll have you know– I make one hell of a pasta.”

You couldn’t help but smile at that.

And as it turns out, and as much as you begrudgingly admit- he did make a hell of a good pasta.

Your time with Jimin turned out to be more enjoyable than you were willing to admit. He cooked for you when he could, and when he couldn’t he at least helped you. Pretty soon, it was just natural for you to take the spot next to him in the sofa and watch his favorite comedic variety show. Your laughs had echoed his.

But one day, you came home to find the room dim.

Huh. Guess he’s coming home late tonight.

And you convinced yourself that you felt relieved because you also felt another emotion that you didn’t feel like addressing.

You were in your bedroom working on a project idea at 2 AM when all of a sudden you hear the door unlock.

I’m just gonna check if he ate dinner.

You told yourself that as you made your way out to the living room. And you were surprised to see a Jimin leaning next to the door. His head was resting on the wall but the rest of his body was slumped, and it seemed that his body was slowly reaching the ground by the second.

“Ohhhh heyyyy Y/N. Wow, you still up?”

“God, are you drunk Jimin? How much did you drink?” You quickly run up to him and support him up by pulling his arm around you.

“Hmmm? Not much I dun think? Just a couple of shots with those smelly assholes,” Jimin slurred as he smiled.

“Just a couple shots, huh. Okay, let’s just get you to bed, kay?”

You manage your best to get him to the sofa. Your arms nearly give out as you release him on the couch.

“Actually, you want to go to my bed? I can–”

Jimin quickly grabs your hand.

“No. It’s okay. Just stay for a minute.”

“O-Oh. Um…okay.”

He inhales and exhales while still gripping your hand.

“I’m tired. Honestly…I’m so tired. Those jealous ass fucking higher-ups. Geniuses don’t get tired, they say. Who the hell are you to tell me I don’t work hard just as much as you do?”

A pang of guilt pierces your heart.

“…Jimin…”

He bitterly chuckles. “Yeah. I know you think that too. But I feel like shit. Like every human does. Cause you know what? I’m human too. But you…But you…” Jimin mutters.

You quietly clutch his hand. You couldn’t say anything- you didn’t really know what to say.

After a few moments, you heard a constant of breathing. You found that Jimin was fast asleep.

You felt your eyes hot with tears.

I’m such a fucking terrible person.

Your hands shake as you squeeze Jimin’s warm hands.

“I’m so, so sorry, Jimin.”

Jimin awoke to a heavy pang to his head. He crinkled his eyes to the unwelcoming sunlight. He found himself toppled with more blankets than he remembered.

Jimin rubbed his eyes and slowly became more aware of his surroundings.

Next to him was a cup of water, some aspirin, and a note that says, “There is breakfast I made in the kitchen.”

Jimin stared at the note for a while before everything hit him all at once.

“Shit…”

When you got home, you found Jimin on the sofa. He was startled by your entrance, and he uncharacteristically fidgeted and became hesitant on what to say.

His cheeks were tinged with pink, and you swore to make sure that you save the image in the archives of your memory.

“Um. Hey, Y/N. You’re back.”

“Oh…hey. Um. Yeah, I’m back.”

A breeze of awkwardness flowed between the two of you, and both of you were stammering to keep the conversation going.

“Hey! So. Apparently they are almost finished fixing my water heater. They should be finished by tomorrow afternoon. Aren’t you glad?”

“…Oh. Tomorrow’s already Tuesday, huh.”

Not met with the reaction he expected, Jimin came to a loss of what to say.

And after a very, very long pause-

“Sorry.”

Both of your eyes widen– both of you had simultaneously apologized to each other.

“Why are you apologizing?”

“Wait, why are you?”

Both of you stared at each other for a moment, and started laughing hysterically at how ridiculous it sounded.

“Oh God, we’re so weird,” you sigh between your giggles.

“Yeah, we definitely are,” he agreed.

And at that moment, the two of you hear a very familiar “meow”.

You turn to the source of the sound.

And a very familiar calico cat stares at the two of you with its very familiar pearly green eyes and white tail.

“Hey, that cat!” Jimin echoes your thoughts.

“You know that cat too?”

“Yeah, I fed it once. Were you the one that gave it that bandage?”

“Yeah, I did. Where did it come from though? Oh wait, where is it going?”

The cat turns around and turns to the two of you again.

“Oh, does it want us to follow it?”

And the cat swiftly turns. You and Jimin both try to follow it, only to stop in front of the veranda.

“Huh? The veranda? But where did the cat go?” Jimin questions.

You quietly open the door to the veranda- and you and Jimin were greeted with quite the surprise.

The dark sky spreaded with a myriad number of stars, each shining with their own dignity. It was a view that took the breath out of both you and Jimin, as the two of you had your jaws open and eyes never wanting to leave the wondrous view of the diamonds adorning the sky.

“Hey. I’m really sorry for my preconception of you,” you started.

“Hmm?” Jimin looked at you, puzzled.

“Last night, I realized that I’ve been such a terrible person. I didn’t realize my own jealousy was clouding my judgment to see you for who you are.”

Jimin stared at you for a while before grinning at you.

“You don’t remember, do you?”

He looked back at the stars.

“It was during high school, and there was a certain art contest.”

In your junior year of high school, the pieces of the said art contest were posted in the hallway.

And well, Jimin was first place, and you were second. You didn’t have any qualms against that; it was what it was. So you silently nod, and was about to head back to class when you heard a scoff.

“So…you aren’t angry? Annoyed by the slightest?”

You turn around to see Park Jimin. He had an expression of chagrin, and you were puzzled as to why. Shouldn’t he be happy if he were first place?

You raise your eyebrows. After a moment, you just sigh.

“Not even in the slightest,” you state, and you walk away.

“…Huh. I… don’t really remember.” You crinkle your eyebrows at the distant memory. Jimin chuckles.

“Yeah. Before, I was content that I was being called a genius with such emptiness. But at that moment, I realized how powerless I really was. I was only human, and a human with an inflated ego.”

He looked at you endearingly.

“People called me genius, but you were the first one to treat me like a human,”

He sheepishly smiles. “And I was really desperate to catch your attention.”

And this Park Jimin, the slightly awkward man that is standing right next to you, was perhaps the Jimin he desperately wanted you to meet. And he didn’t really know how to so all he could do was act like a boy who teased a girl because he liked her. After all, you bet, he never had to do the approaching– he was always approached. Both of you just needed some kind of push to become honest with your feelings.

The two of you stood close to each other. On normal days, he would stand in the next veranda, making teasing remarks at you and you would steam fury in response. But tonight, things were different. He was standing next to you, in the same veranda, and the two of you were ever so close you swear you could hear each other’s heartbeats.

You smiled. You no longer denied that your heart was indeed beating way faster than normal for no one other than Park Jimin. And that emotion that you have tried to deny for the past couple of days were closer to blooming than being extinguished.

“You know, I want to understand you better, Jimin.”

“Really? Then, maybe we can go out on a date? I mean, if you want to, of course,” Jimin shyly asks. His cheeks turn rosy as he gives you the signature eye smile he was always so popular for. You scoffed at it when you were younger. But this time, you just might fall for it.

“Sure. I would like that,” you softly say.

And when the close proximity between the two of you reached zero as your lips touched his, a shooting star flashed quickly in the background.

“You know, we could film a movie like this,” Jimin sneakily whispers.

You laugh as you slap his arm jokingly.

You ended up spending the entire night on the veranda, and saw the sunrise greet you. You and Jimin were wrapped together tightly in a blanket, and defeated the cold autumn morning air. You saw the landlady walking down and you waved to her.

But for a moment, you think you see a familiar white tail.

Hmm?

But as you rub your eyes again, the image of it was gone and you see the landlady wave back. You blame your lack of sleep as you smile and slowly close your eyes and drift off to your dreams.

Calico Cats bring good luck.

-Ahhh idk this turned out way differently than I expected lol. 

-Anyways I just did this for fun and it was kind of a breather against all my midterms and working on pt. 2 for hhdd

-I hope Darcy likes this :) Thanks for the writing opportunity!

[sanguinesprout]

Therapy/Counselling Diary #9 (and some silly but blah but good bits)

Weeeeeelp. As usual this session was uhhhh... *blank blank* I literally blank loads while in the actual session and feel like I totally have to wing my responses every single time in a slight panic (probably cause I’m not used to getting up early and am lacking sleep, also because I’m just really slow in general hahaha ugh). I’m still dying of lack of sleep idk if I can write right now so imma write out some real quick notes to go off and help jog my memory later before I forget anymores. Phew, wracked my brains all I can, time to go laze around and zzzzz... Okay slept some and shopped some and slept some more, time to write! Just get the main things down hoo!

About last weeks attempts at helping at front of shop, I kinda just observed instead, at first kinda just sat and shrank down out of view and no one really said anything to me, though I’m sure they noticed me lol. I managed to make a short convo with one customer with some general small talk stuff like the weather, where you work and stuff (yay?!) and then totally blanked so hard and welp, awkward silence (not yay!). I’m glad I tried and even my dad was impressed because usually I try so hard to avoid being seen by any customers and just don’t talk much to anyone. Felt kinda good but I got scared a bit and didn’t try that much afterwards, boo.

On another day I stood around eating fruit and helping set up stuff on my mum’s phone and said hello and bye to some customers which felt much more sort of natural in a way. Like because I was already doing something and not just sitting waiting and doing absolutely nothing else but looking awks as hell and stuff, so the conversation (or greeting in this case) was just the secondary focus. But... maybe people felt less inclined to talk to me properly because they can see I’m slightly occupied, that’s kind of bad sigh... I mean I’m glad I tried more than once, though I know I could’ve tried much much harder but I guess that’s what this week is about *wails and flails*

The counsellor said that it’s fine that conversation fades out, it’s natural and the customer only spends so long in the shop waiting for their order and has to go anyways. Also the more you try, the more you’ll ask and get to know about the customer (especially regulars), the general small talk might become more personal and specific over time and your knowledge base of general conversational content will grow. You could even lighten up things with small playful jokes and compliments. Like with everything, I always forget you have to start somewhere, start out small, baby steps and the like.

When I told her some customers knew me, as they had seen me when I was little (yeah, wow, it was so nice being young and not so afraid of people then or afraid of being recognised I guess *cry*) but I felt awkward as I don’t know them, she said to note that they said it in a positive way and take it as a compliment that they actually remember you and to reply you could just say thank you or even joke it up a little. Wow, it’s easy to miss nice things when you’re all fogged up with worry. Most people don’t remember a lot from when they’re little anyways too so I shouldn’t feel bad about it. I usually just kind of do that little smiley laugh but the powers of awk are always by my side, my faithful sidekick that helps me do my ultimate awk situation special move um, yay. 

I gotta let myself know that it’s okay, not to overthink and such as always. I did alright, I did good and I should use this to motivate me to try even more. Easier said then done huff, as usual I feel time and opportunity is slipping away so quickly. She noted that we only have 2 sessions left (that makes 11 in total haha how strange, I guess the first one kind of didn’t count maybe) so I really need to get stuff done so that when I am done seeing her and am left to my own devices, I’ll actually know what to do and won’t just stop trying and fall into the same slump as before. 

When you try, not a moment is wasted because you are doing and you are learning, but if you don’t try then nothing is learned and then it’s wasteful. Oh! ‘Nothing ventured, nothing gained’ hah! As with all quotes I happen to remember, I hope I’m using it right lol. I’m gonna try commit it to memory some more along with the rest of the stuff I sometime think to motivate myself, my derpy mantras that I also often forget lolol.

I also talked about how I went out shopping even more lately, that I was getting even less conscious of others and the irrational thoughts in that kind of setting. Repeated doing of something it always makes it easier, ‘it begins to feel like second nature’ is the phrase she used. I still feel uncomfortable at times and worry a lot when out but it’s true, if you just go and get on with what you’re doing, your focus is on that and everything else fades into the background where it should be.

She noticed I had a bag of some stuff I wanted to return to a shop and she asked how I was going to go about it. I said I was unsure if I wanted to return it even though it was not right for me, because I felt I hassled the shop keeper a lot, and felt bad about it. But the thing is, the thing isn’t right for me so there is no point in me keeping it, the shopkeeper is fine with me returning it, ‘no obligations’ is even what he said (lol), they’re professional, their feelings wouldn’t be hurt, and that’s why I decided to return it. 

In more hypothetical-ness I kind of said that I would say something like ‘the thing just isn’t for me, maybe I’ll come back another time/look at something else’ or w/e or maybe she asked what I would do in that situation if they wanted to be more salesperson-y and she asked is that really what I wanted and I was like ‘tbh no, I don’t want to look at anymore of their stuff, I want to go elsewhere and look’ and she was telling me to ‘stick to my guns’ and ‘be adamant on your first choice’ kind of thing and she’s right, there’s no point in me lying because I feel bad about it, they have plenty of other customers too and probably lots of them return things, it’s no big deal. There was some talk about customer rights and watching and learning how they handle things being useful to my own retail skill pursuits too.

When I actually actually went and returned the stuff (it’s shoes btw and they were uncomfortable, I keep beating around the bush about specifics again why why why? .__. ugh) the shopkeeper was totally chill, he has been every time I went to the shop and the refund was done super quick, no hurt feelings (lol seriously I don’t even know why I think like this, but even my mum was saying it feels bad with all the hassle, but I’m glad I didn’t let her words sway my decision) and he was still super friendly and reassuring (’oh no no, it’s fine, don’t worry about it’ c:). Tbh I already knew everything was going to be okay, it’s my sucky mind as always (and it’s just that sometimes diff employees were there instead of him and they were much less friendly and helpful, I was glad they weren’t serving that day lol, I hope that doesn’t sound too mean ack ><)

She talked a little about how irrational thoughts are totally normal and that everyone has them, it’s just that different people handle them differently and some people can become trapped in them while others don’t let them have their way so easily or at all. Also she asked about how much progress I think I’ve made and I said something lame I forgot and she said that she thinks I’ve done great and where I am now and how I am now is much different to how I was when she first saw me. She praised me a little more and told me I undermine myself a lot. I do see it too, I have been trying even though at times I felt it didn’t go right or wasn’t enough, but I have learned things and I have changed somewhat. Understanding yourself and your thoughts, it definitely  helps getting past them and challenging them a little easier.

For next week she wants me to write down a recap of everything I’ve learned so far eek..! Writing down stuff irl is so hard for me, all the writing I’ve done irl so far feels really half assed and bleh because feelings and stuff and ahhhh... I need to get over it, just do it! I also have a sheet similar to the thoughts and emotions sheet but a with more detailed columns that I have to fill in (the columns are like: situation, feelings, thoughts, evidence supporting thoughts, evidence against, actual facts and you score how much you felt it was going to be and how much it actually turns out being). I have a chance to redo the small amount of last minute scrawl I did on last week’s one, I’m nervous gdi, maybe I should write this situation as the first thing... not really... or should I? >< I really need to get out of the habit of putting off and leaving things last minute @x@

Also another main main thing I need to do is to help out in the shop for reals this time, like physically doing stuff and getting much more involved with chatting. Imma dieeeee.... no no, I’ll be okay, I gotta do it! I mean, I can do it! The first few steps are always the hardest, just try your best, go for it, yolo! ^^” I hope I’ll have enough to talk about and write about next time, c’mon hoo!

In non therapy related stuff, I spent some time with my sis and her bf. Went to a big shopping centre semi-unplanned, unfortunately on a day where I was super ill (like gut cramping run to the toilet and die there for like half an hour ill) but I got past that and it was pretty good! I felt like a total burden, at times I felt self-conscious as usual, but nowhere near the amount I would have some while before or the amount I thought I would if I didn’t go. Ohh! Damn, maybe I should write this on that sheet lol this is a prime example of proving myself/my thoughts wrong. 

I felt kind of brave that day, going out when usually I would have avoided it, I mean I actually had a reason to, but I didn’t let it or a lot of my bad feelings get in the way and the experience was useful and nice and something I’d really been wanting. I saw some nice things and took photos of some nice things too, I even found some shoes that were comfy but didn’t buy them... but there’s always next time! I’m definitely going again! Shopping is fun! Taking photos is fun! (even though I missed a few opportunities, but next time imma get em!) ^^ If only I wasn’t poor... but that’s what jobs are for and that’s my goal! All the more reason to be motivated about it >:D Somehow this doesn’t sound to good, but uh, whatever works! xD

I also went to my sis’ house and the supermarket some as an unplanned evening trip and did a little crafty stuff. I’m still working on the same project since a while back but like with everything else I’m learning as I go, baby steps some more! ^^ I still have to go to the post office again, I kinda avoided going today but imma do it all on my own again tomorrow. I also emailed some sellers online and asked about some products I was interested in. Sounds lame but I was chickening out on doing so for a long time, it turned out fine, was my silly thoughts and anxieties acting up. Phoned to ask about some post related stuff too (I can’t remember if I wrote this in the last post lol). I was trying to find a way to email to avoid phoning but there was no such thing and I thought, well just stop messing around and just do itttt! It was fine, I mean I awked a lot but at least I got my answer! I did it yay! More examples of doing and disproving my own idiocy! XD

Hmm.. hmmm this post, is it finished? LOL. I only wrote very few notes, but I’m glad I did because it helped me write and recall stuff. I’m a little sad I didn’t use food emojis and a bullet pointy style like last time haha. Ahhh ack! a scary sound just came from the wall wtf wtf wtf?! My heart just leapt out ahhh ;_____; I think I’ll go hide now... x^x No no, need to go do some useful stuff! 

When I started this post I kept thinking of it as a chore and kind if wanted to skip out on it, but I did it yay! (Per usual lol) I collected up all that useful and motivational stuff and now I’m pumped! Man I’m so nauseous and I think my writing came out real ditsy again and feel like I wanna edit it to hell but at the same time I cba and want to do other stuff like artsy things that I’ve also been putting off like hell, I seriously have the energy and motivation of a rock most of the time. W/e there’s no need to fuss over the post, it’s fine (I hope lol) and it’s okay to have some down time when needed. There’s no time like the present! Time to go do stuff!

Have a noice evening! Go go! ^^

[platinumjeon]

BTS Reaction - When another member finds your bralette in their room

Anonymous said: Could you do a reaction to where one of the other members finds your lacy bralette in their room please???

this is gonna be a little longer, I’m in a very write-y mood today lol This will be under a “read more” because it is kinda long!!!

Suga:

You and Suga had been together for almost two years now - and you’ve only slipped up once. You were alone with Jin in the dorm while all the other boys, including Suga, went off to do their own thing. You walked out of the kitchen and into the living room, and shouted at Jin to see if he wanted to order take out while the other boys were away for the time being. When he didn’t answer, you quickly pulled out your phone and sent Suga a text:

When will you be home? I think Jin and I are going to order Chinese or something x

I’ll be home in five minutes babe, just wait for me before you order.

You smile at his reply and set your phone down, now looking around for where Jin might have disappeared to. 

“Jin? C’mon, I’m hungry and Suga will be home in-” you stop as you open the door to Suga and Jin’s shared bedroom, revealing Jin, the most weirded out look on his face. In his fingers he lightly held onto your red, lacy bralette, as if it was the most disgusting thing he’d ever witnessed.

“Y/N. What. Is this?” 

At that moment, Suga walks in and sees you standing in the doorway to his room, and steps aside to see Jin holding up your bra. 

“Oh, shit. Sorry.” Suga laughs, and Jin starts doing one of his rants like the one he did in the Christmas VLive then flings the bra into a pile of dirty laundry that has yet to be finished. He begins to lecture you guys on the importance of cleaning up after yourselves when you’re “finished being little rabbits.” 

Namjoon:

Since the start of your relationship, you have always kept extra clothes at their dorm. Namjoon dedicated one of his designated drawers to all of your clothes. It was often that the two of you ended up making out, and making out led to other things, but it was not often that you left your stuff around.

You were very conscious of your boyfriend sharing a room with Jungkook, who granted, wasn’t in the dorm a lot except for when he was sleeping or wanted to pry one of the members off the couch to make them cook him ramen. 

It was one of those days that no one else was in the dorm, and somehow, you managed to steal Namjoon away from practice early. Lately the time you two spent together was taking naps and just cuddling. It’s not that you didn’t like that, but..you needed more Namjoon. 

“I’m glad the boys aren’t here.”

“Why’s that?” Namjoon would say, raising his eyebrows and letting a small smile grow on his face. You loved when he did that little half-smile, it was cute and suggestive all on it’s own. 

“Because I can do this, without worrying about anyone barging in on us,” you’d say, tugging at the bottom of his white t-shirt.

About an hour later, the two of you were dressed and back to normal - but without thinking, you just grabbed a new bralette from your drawer in Namjoon’s dresser and walked out of the room, calling for your boyfriend to grab the laundry from the dryer before it wrinkled.

The boys came home with Indian food and the entire house smelled amazing. Right before the lot of you sat down to eat, Jungkook jumped up and said he’d be right back because he didn’t want to get any sauce on his shirt.

Only seconds after the door to Namjoon’s room shut, you all heard a sharp squeal from inside. Immediately, everyone went quiet, and the door opened to reveal Jungkook - his hair ruffled, and a funny look on his face: and he was holding your lacy, bright pink bralette in one fist.

“Damn, clean up your stuff or keep it in your pants, you guys!” He shouts with a big smirk on his face as he chucked the bralette out the door where it landed at your feet. All the boys laughed and snickered, while you and Namjoon turned to look away, your cheeks on fire.

Jimin:

The two of you had plans to head out to one of the nicest restaurants in town. It was your one year anniversary, and you were happy to celebrate. You and Jimin had left all the other boys back at the dorm, and they just snickered when you told them Jimin was finally taking you out for your anniversary, shouting, “Have fun! If you’re gonna do anything after wards, please go back to your place instead!” 

You knew they were joking, but you couldn’t help but blush as Jimin guided you out the door with a smirk on his face. The traffic was terrible by the time Jimin pulled out of the parking garage, and the two of you sat in the car while ToppDogg played on the radio. 

“Do you think we should try to turn around and go to a different restaurant? At this rate, we’ll get there in an hour.” Jimin would say, lightly tapping his fingers along to the song playing softly in the background.

You sighed, wishing the world wasn’t seemingly against you for once. You’ve had this reservation for a month, and all you wanted was to celebrate with Jimin, but it seemed like this wasn’t happening.

Suddenly, your phone began ringing. It was connected to the bluetooth in the car, so the music stopped as you accepted the call. Both you and Jimin heard J-Hope’s voice shouting in the background, and you stopped dead as soon as you heard Taehyung begin talking:

“Uh, just so you guys - wait, can Jimin hear me? Just so you guys know, J-Hope found your, um, bra, on the floor in our room.” He said, whispering the last part like it was this huge secret.

“I FOUND ANOTHER ONE!” You heard J-Hope yelp in the back again, and you only groaned internally and looked at Jimin, who was stifling a laugh. 

“He’s freaking out,” Taehyung whispered again, before hanging up.

At this point, all thoughts about the restaurant and your dwindling reservation time were forgotten as you and Jimin laughed until your stomachs hurt, and it was ultimately decided that you two would go relieve the poor boys from the sight of your bras.

“Wimps,” Jimin muttered to you with a smile as he pulled into the parking garage.

Jungkook:

You were patiently sitting at the table in the boys’ dorm room, waiting for them all to flood into the room after a meeting with their manager. The place was an absolute mess - laundry strewn across the couch and empty gatorade bottles tipped over on the stained glass coffee table. The only area that was the kitchen - thanks to Jin.

You began cleaning up in the living room, returning laundry to their correct places and guessing who’s clothing was whose. After throwing the trash into the bin, you came across a piece of fabric sticking out from under the linen closet door.

Bending down, you snatch the off-white piece of cloth from under the door and realize with a look of horror on your face that it was underwear - and most of the stuff out here in the living room wasn’t clean.

Seconds later, the boys all barge into the house with loud chatter, and stop when they see you holding up the underwear with two fingers. 

“Who’s is this?” You demand, your eyebrows raised and a shit-eating grin beginning to grow on your face. All the boys look at each other before they sheepishly pointed at Rapmon, who glared at his members with a pointed look.

“That’s gross!” You said, flinging the underwear in Namjoon’s direction.

Namjoon sniffs, and goes, “Oh yeah? Look what I found the other day.” He disappeared into his and Jungkook’s room, and coming out with your black, lacy bra with a little bow in the middle, hanging from in between his thumb and index finger.

Your mouth goes slack as you and Jungkook look at each other in total alarm, and he’s mouthing stuff to you that you don’t understand as the boys begin crying with laughter. Rapmon only laughs with them and throws the bra in your direction.

“Our little Jungkookie has grown up, hasn’t he?” Jimin says in between bursts of laughter, ruffling Jungkook’s hair. Jungkook was as red as he could get and wouldn’t look anyone in the eye as he laughed nervously.

Later, after you smacked Rapmon in the back of the head for his little act, you find Jungkook sitting in his bed, scrolling through his phone.

“We gotta be more careful. Hyungs are mean.” He pouts, pulling you by your waist into his lap and tickling you until you’re both laughing loudly.

“Hey! You two better not be fooling around in there!” 

Taehyung:

You were at the studio with the boys for the day. They had a lot of stuff to work on, so while they needed to focus on their dancing, you hung out in the studio and watched them.

Taehyung would smile and wink at you periodically as they moved from song to song, not even stopping to take a break. The way their bodies moved so gracefully always awed you, and you only broke your trance when the choreographer’s voice would raise after the music stopped to direct one of the boys into a different position.

After going through BS&T, I Need U, Baepsae, and Dope, Seokjin surrendered and asked to go get water. Being the wonderful girlfriend you were, you offered to grab all the water bottles for the rest of the boys. Seeing as you couldn’t carry seven water bottles, Jin decided to accompany you.

You walked side by side the way down to the break room and talked about the dances, and he explained that BS&T was probably the hardest for him. You only smiled and told him to keep working on it, because from your point of view, it looked really good.

As you arrived in the break room, you began gathering all the boys’ personal water bottles. They were all different colors, and two minutes later you had collected all of them besides one - Taehyung’s. You searched around the table, in the bathroom, and in his backpack.

Just as you were about to give up and give Taehyung your water bottle, Jin stops.

“Y/N. What is...” He starts, rising slowly to reveal your hot pink lacy bra, “this?”

“Oh my god.” You said, and Jin began laughing before you could say anything else. His windshield laugh made you burst into laughter, before going serious and yelping, “Don’t tell the boys!”

Jin stops laughing just as Taehyung walks into the room, presumably wondering what’s taking you two so long. He stops dead in his tracks when he sees you and Jin standing at opposite sides of the room, and Jin holding up your bra.

“Oh, shit,” Taehyung begins, before dissolving into laughter himself. “Don’t tell the boys!” He says.

“I won’t, but keep it in your pants and not in the break room!” Jin smirks before walking out with water bottles balanced in his arms.

You and Taehyung look at each other. “No more sex in the break room?” He says with his eyebrows raised.

“No more sex in the break room,” you confirm, before pulling Taehyung to your side. The two of you walk out of the room together and as promised, the boys still don’t know about the whole bra-in-the-break-room incident.

J-Hope:

You were helping Jimin put up pictures on the wall in his, Taehyung and J-Hope’s room. It was obvious that they all missed their families, and Jimin had gotten pictures printed and put in frames to hang on the wall.

The other boys were strewn around the dorm, and you could hear Jungkook playing video games out in the living room. Taehyung was playing against him, and they were yelling things like, “You can’t do that!” “The red cart is faster,” and “Ha! I win!” You just smiled at their words as you helped hold the frame steady.

J-Hope opened the door a crack to see if you were in the room, and when he saw that you were, he opened it wider and stepped inside. “Whatcha guys doing?” He said, shutting the door to drown out Jungkook’s and Taehyung’s shouts.

“Alright, where did I put the box of nails?” Jimin said, completely ignoring J-Hope’s presence since he was so focused on getting the frame up.

“After you’re done, we should go out. I heard there’s this really nice new restaurant up the road.” J-Hope said, walking over to you and wrapping an arm around your waist. He stared at the picture lovingly.

“We need to get your family’s picture up-” You begin, but Jimin’s shrill voice cuts in first.

“Y/N! What the hell?” He says, and you and J-Hope turn around to see Jimin holding up your white, lacy bralette.

Your eyebrows shoot up and you begin to stutter as you look at J-Hope in hopes that he will help you out here, but he’s just trying to keep in his laughter. 

“I-its, I can explain!” You say, your hands held out in front of you to try to grab at your bra. Jimin only holds it higher, and just to your luck, Suga opens the door to see what all the commotion was.

When he saw the bralette in Jimin’s hand, his face contorts into silent laughter. Even Jungkook and Taehyung abandon their game to see what was going on and why Suga was laughing so hard, and when they did see, the two immediately stumble away going, “My eyes, they’re burning!” “I can’t unsee the image of Y/N and Hobi.”

All Suga does is go, “Damn, Hobi.” Before shaking his head and leaving the room.

Jin:

You laugh as Jin tells yet another dad joke, and all the boys just groan. They were sat around the table, filming another Bangtan Bomb while you sat behind the camera to watch. You had to be careful not to say anything because the camera could easily pick up your voice, so it was hard to not laugh at Jin’s dumb joke.

“Suga, do you have any stories to tell?” Jimin asks, as they were all sharing stories about the dorm and things that have happened.

Suga thinks for a minute before glaring at Jin playfully and going, “Well, maybe one. I share a room with Jin. And Jin has a girlfriend.” He starts.

Jin’s eyes go wide and he immediately interjects, cutting Suga off by clapping his hands. All the boys just rolled their eyes, but Jin had already launched into a story about how Namjoon burnt ramen once and it smelled like rotten egg for a week. 

Later, the eight of you were back in the dorm, lounging around the living room. It was a laid back night, and you hoped that everyone could agree on a movie. You and Suga had been arguing about it for a while - Nemo or I Am Legend.

Finally, Suga got annoyed and went to look for another movie you could all agree on. 

Seconds after he disappeared into his shared room, he came out again with a look of disdain on his face.

“I think I know what Jin and Y/N were doing while we were all gone last night.” He spoke with a small smile growing on his face, and from behind his back he pulled out your tan, lacy bra. 

Immediately, the boys gasped and began to laugh. You and Jin shared an embarrassed look as redness creeped up his neck and you hid your face in your hands.

“Oh, yeah? At least I’m getting some, are you?” Jin shot back, his windshield laughter rising up again as all the boys made an “ooo” sound. 

Suga only grumbled but began to laugh after you ran over and snatched the bra out of his hand.

Whew, that was a long one! Happy belated Valentines Day guys, I love you all.

Requests are open!

[noctis-and-friends]

Stormy Night

A quick Noctis x Female Reader one shot that I came up with. I’m a little self-conscious about my writing but I did my best! (✿´ ꒳ ` )

Exams were coming up next week and you, Noctis, and Prompto decided that a group study session would be a great way to prepare. The three of you went to Noct’s apartment. You’ve been there before to hang out and play games, so this wasn’t anything unusual. In addition to the obvious educational benefit, you had a lot of fun hanging out with the guys. You had been close friends with Prompto for the longest time, but you and Noct became fast friends because you didn’t fall head over heels for him like other girls did just because he was a prince. Granted, he was a great looking guy, but you’d never say that out loud.

Ignis came by half an hour into the session to make dinner - a heavenly meal as always. After about three hours of studying and the occasional round of King’s Knight, the sun had set and the city lights of Insomnia illuminated the streets. A light rain had started, quietly tapping the glass of the large apartment window. Prompto stretched and yawned. “I’m gonna take off and get some sleep, I was almost late for class this morning.” He stood up and slung his bag over his right shoulder. “We should do this again, it was super helpful.”

You said your farewells as Prompto left, leaving you and the prince to finish the last set of math problems. It took awhile, but the level of satisfaction and pride the two of you felt once you completed it made it well worth it. You were packing your books back into your bag and getting ready to leave when Noctis suddenly stopped you.

“No way you’re going home in this weather.” You looked up at him and then turned your attention to the window. The rain had picked up tremendously, it was like the gods were emptying buckets of water from the heavens. It was so heavy that you could barely see the building the next block over. You lived quite a distance from Noct’s place, so walking home would prove to be quite perilous; you didn’t expect it to get this bad.

“Well, what am I supposed to do?” You questioned, easing your bag onto your lap.

“Uh, I don’t know. Stay the night?” Noctis responded honestly. “No harm in it, I mean, I don’t want to hear you got washed away or something. Better safe than sorry, right?” He left you in the living room to find you some clothes to sleep in. “Make yourself at home,” Noctis said through an exhale as he walked off. You couldn’t pull yourself to move from the chair you were seated in. You suddenly felt old feelings about Noctis resurfacing. Being good friend with him had sort of suppressed that childish crush you had on the prince when you had first met him. Spending the night alone with him at his house spurned something within you. It almost felt like something new was beginning between you and Noctis. A sudden boom of thunder ripped you from your thoughts. You shook your head to further clear your mind. No, he’s just being the kind friend that he is, looking out for my well being, you resolved. You let the loud rain pounding against the window distract you from other silly notions as Noctis entered the room. “Hope you don’t mind sweats and a t-shirt.”

“O-oh not at all! Thanks!” You quickly took the clothes from him - a grey shirt and a pair of navy blue sweat pants - and made your way to the bathroom to change. They were a bit big on you but you still appreciated the kind gesture. You tried your best to keep it at that - a kind gesture - but other thoughts kept flooding into your mind, much like the intense rain outside.

You wandered out of the bathroom, your school uniform folded up in your arms. A quick glance to your right and you saw the door to Noctis’ room wide open. You can see him removing his school shirt, revealing his pale, chiseled upper body. You couldn’t look away, your eyes were glued to his form. Lost in a dreamy gaze, you didn’t notice that he was staring back at you.

“Did you need something?” Him pulling his shirt down was like closing the door of your fantasies.

“Ah! Um no…” you tried to recover your cool exterior. “Do you have an extra blanket?”

Noctis gave you a bewildered look. “You weren’t planning on sleeping on the couch, were you?”

You felt your cheeks heat up. “Noct!” You hissed, feeling almost embarrassed. “I can’t sleep in the same bed with you!”

The prince maintained his unperturbed demeanor. “Why not? We’re cool right?”

“Yeah, but -” All you could think about was his fine features that you had a glimpse of.

“Then it’s not a big deal. C'mon, we got school tomorrow.” Noctis walked past you, entered the bathroom, and started rummaging through the drawers. “I might have a spare toothbrush you can use.”

After utilizing one of his unopened toothbrushes, you awkwardly put yourself in Noctis’ bed. You lay as stiff as a board on the very edge, pondering over the strange feelings you were experiencing and if you were getting mixed messages from your good friend. Maybe it was just your mind playing tricks on you; part of you hoped that was true, but another part of you really hoped something more was developing. You pouted with the covers pulled up to your chin when Noctis came into the bedroom. He chuckled slightly at your ridiculous position. “I said you can get comfortable,” he reminded you as he crawled into bed.You tensed up even more as you felt him move around beside you. An extremely loud crash of thunder made you jump, eliciting a sly grin from Noctis. “Scared of a little thunder?” He asked playfully. 

“No…” You countered. 

“Heh, are you scared of a little rumor spreading around the school?” He continued. Your face heated up like a furnace at the sound of those sudden words. 

“What is that supposed to mean!?” You cried out defensively. 

“Staying at my place, sleeping in the same bed… No wonder you’re so worked up, (F/N), the possibilities are endless.” He mused enchantingly. Noctis shifted his weight slightly closer to you. “When you think about it, anything can happen.“ His succulent voice sent chills down your spine. You felt the subtlety of his body heat tickling your skin, and his steamy breath caressing your cheek. It felt like your entire body was aflame now. You never thought that you would fall victim to Noctis’ smoky voice, but it made you want to melt. You held your breath, unsure of what to expect. When you were studying, you didn’t anticipate spending the night at his apartment, let alone wearing his clothes and sharing the same bed. The sound of the pouring rain was soon drowned out by your own heartbeat. You were conflicted as to what you wanted, whether you wanted this to end immediately or if you wanted Noctis to continue. What did he want from you? You nervously waited for what would come next, only to hear soft, playful laughter. “You’re so cute when you’re all flustered,” Noctis commented lightheartedly. The seductive undertones of his voice had disappeared and he had shifted to his side of the bed with his back facing you. “Goodnight, (F/N). See you tomorrow.” He left you there with your body feeling like the surface of the sun as you tried to comprehend what had just happened. You were relieved, but also a little disappointed. Eventually, as the heavy rain and passing thunder started to lull you to sleep, a small smile formed on your lips. Maybe you can make something more out of your friendship with Noctis after all. At this rate, it would only be a matter of time.

This is my first time writing a FFXV fanfic down so yeah… It’ll get better with time lol. I have tons of ideas lined up that I can practice with.

[sanguinesprout]

Therapy/Counselling Diary #3- ish + 4 (plus some inter-related bits about monies and general stuff)

Ack! I um... I forgot what happened in the third appointment lolol I should really note things down straight away or in one of those neat diary apps on ze phone, they look so useful I should really just stop hesitating and try one really >^< 

I had such a bad inner meltdown the other day, I was thinking for so long and deep while doing everything that day that I just don’t even ;; I zoned out thinking too hard while sitting on the toilet and showering even more than usual on a whole bunch of other days too lol... The things I thought were really bringing me down so low and the intensity of the negativity in there was so strong but I can’t let it mess me up and take me off track. It’s okay to get lost in though sometimes, but gotta make sure not to pull the gloominess and irrational into reality. I got past it, I’ll be okay! ^^

Imma just merge my regular kind of post with the therapy posts because why not (also I lazy lol). The reluctance and anxiety I get over thinking about writing these posts is so ughhh the mental effort needed is more than I have the capacity for .__. I’m so distracted and restless and haven’t been well at all, but I gotta get this done. It doesn’t matter if it sucks, just do it, it’ll be fine! ^^

Anyways, in that 3rd week in general I um... I made cookies! And not just once, but twice! Hell yeah! X3 It’s sounds lame but it’s a great accomplishment for me! It was fun and every time I ate a cookie I would think yay I made this! Too bad my parents weren’t all that interested but they did try a cookie each (both batches) and thought it was alright! :D I hope to actually wow them with something in future, huff huff gotta keep trying! Gotta put even more love into it! ^^

Okay, skipping to this week for now. I went for my fourth session and my homework from the previous week was to have had a look at hobby clubs or classes and to join one if possible. I looked but the only things I could really find were actual college courses (which cost big monies) and some really basic craft clubs to make small specific things. I can’t help but feel like the things done there can be done at home with some online tutorials and that it’d be wasteful to go but that obviously defeats the purpose of everything @^@”

She said to make sure that the club or whatever is something I really wanted to do/am genuinely interested in learning and to let the conversation practice sort of thing always just be something there on the side, so killing two birds with one stone. This was also in relation to something I said about feeling awkward well... when there’s awkward silences. Since I and the other person/people should be focusing on the task at hand, it won’t matter if conversation fades because it’s only secondary to why we’re there, just a side quest of sorts on my main mission.

So uh, I told her that those were the kinds of things I found, not a lot out there and that they costed money which brought me on to start looking up jobs a little instead. Looking at the required skills and qualifications parts of the job pages made me feel pretty awful as I lack so much, but I saw people say to just apply anyways and you never know, you could be perfect for it even if on paper you didn’t seem so. I came across some jobs with no requirements too which is like ding ding! But the reviews on them were not so good. I feel like I can do it, but at the same time I feel like I’m not ready at all, gotta keep taking baby steps for now to build my confidence and skills, it’ll be okay.

She showed me this diagram of uhh... it was a vicious cycle of negative thoughts..? I can’t remember perfectly but it was basically a cycle where your mind jumps the gun and catastrophizes and causes anxiety to flare. This just goes on to confirm all these bad feels and beliefs you have originating from past things and allows them to seep into current things and scare and hold you back and everything just loops infinitely. That was probably the worst explanation ever, my bad, but my laziness and terrible memory knows no bounds @_@” 

I have seen this type of vicious cycle diagram before of course, but she explained it a bit more with an actual relevant example of an event or task I am or would do and how each step of the cycle relates to the workings of my thoughts then. Like to do with me avoiding doing stuff because I’m worried they won’t be perfect or turn out well or that I see myself badly because in the past that’s how I noticed people saw me (or assumed they saw me) and I keep believing it is going to be the same now (so I automatically assume the same again).

Oh! That’s something I went into a bit more, about people looking at me weirdly/not liking me. She asked how I could tell and I mentioned I’m really conscious of body language and stuff like them seeming disinterested, reluctant or with a sour expression when I try to talk to them and that it gives me the vibe that I’m undesirable to converse or look at. But she was able to unravel and dissolve most of that by saying how would I know that those expressions and behaviour are directly linked to me and that instead it could just be the person having a headache or a bad day and that even if they really are disinterested and reply half assed then well, so what... I am making the effort and if they don’t want to return it then it’s not my fault and it’s maybe not worth my time and I should just move on without taking all these self hurting assumptions and unimportant memories with me.

I do try to see things from others perspectives and sometimes I feel I am overly considerate but sometimes it’s just too hard when you’re just stuck inside your own head with all these bad thoughts and insecurities crushing you in and stopping you from seeing out. I want to not read in too deeply or to not misread others and to not forget to take care of myself and not be overly sensitive. 

When my mind jumps to a negative assumption I’m gonna tell it to stand down and not try to dive deep into where it doesn’t need to be. Also with jumping to negative conclusions about doing things, I’m just going to try to not think about it and just do it instead and if I can’t refrain from thinking ‘what’s the worst that could happen?’, I am going to also ask myself ‘what’s the best that can happen?’ too. I say this like it’s magically gonna happen from now on but I know it’s not gonna be so easy, I gotta just keep reminding myself and let myself fall into a much healthier pattern, baby steps some more! A stampede of baby steps might happen all at once, who knows ^^

Ah! On the 3rd week (I’m jumping back and forth I know but oh well, as long as my memory gets sparked and running again haha) I think we discussed what I would like to focus on, as in one specific area (as she had to write it down on this form thing). It was a lil disappointing to know it had to be so specific or closed and we decided on just self confidence in general (and just being myself which just lead her back to just putting self confidence). I’m kinda iffy about it though but oh well, just be grateful silly me!

I plucked up the courage to mention I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to put forth and resolve all my deeper troubles and to again to ask her about whether having an actual diagnosis would be a useful thing (even though I know she cannot give one). I know it would be valuable to me and possibly of use with the financial help stuff but she was just kind of like hmmm... nope (and not to worry about it I guess). That was a bit of a downer but maybe if I really wanted to I could pursue one elsewhere later on somehow. 

She said she feels I probably just have anxiety and am socially awkward. Hm... that definitely rings true and before knowing of AVPD that’s what I thought for sure. I guess it’s kind of nice in a way to not sound so bad? Or maybe she just doesn’t want me to self-prophecise (which I think I might have been doing all the while eep! xAx). Who knows what I have or what I am, giving myself a name or label to refer to might be a bad thing after all, maybe I’ll find out later on or maybe I’ll be able to get past all this without needing it or being it.

Um anyways, one of the things I was avoiding or kind of also forgot about is to apply for financial help (benefits) while I am unemployed and trying to get better. She used this as an example with the cycle diagram too. I was really stressing about it this week as she said to make sure to get it done for next week because without it (the monies) we wouldn’t be able to progress (pay and go to clubs or whatever and so grow some more socially and in confidence). I researched it more and I found another sort of option (as well as the other past option which I am going to ignore for now... bad me ><) and just well, after a long while of thinking all these negative outcomes and things just decided to kick all those thoughts and do it. I needed to do it and it is true, if I don’t try, I won’t know and I thought back to what she said which is that I do deserve it (because I keep feeling like I don’t even though my many struggles are indeed very real and valid .__.).

I did the phone call to start the benefits claim yesterday and it wasn’t so bad... I mean it sucked for sure, but well, it could have been worse I guess lol... The person on the other end kept talking fast and sounded out of breath and kind of accented, so many of the things they said was totally unclear and I had to say ‘pardon’ and ‘sorry what?’ about 20 times. Some things I still didn’t understand perfectly and the person was kinda unhelpful/unwilling to explain better even when I asked, which just felt like wthhh even, but welp I got through it anyways! :D I made sure to prepare all the info needed and to not overthink and just do it and I did it yay!!

Now comes the waiting for the actual form I have to fill in which I am so anxious about because of the amount of detail needed and it’s the super deep personal kind of details which I always struggle to express in any form. Then after that there’s a face to face assessment which is making me die just thinking about it x__x but... but, it’ll be okay, c’mon... I can do this!! I’ll never know if I don’t try! That’s the thought that kept pushing me lately, I gotta keep it in mind even more because it works pretty good (though I’ve ignored it a lot in the past or well, fear just always came first and eradicated any other thought pretty much, but that’ll change now!). The outcome may be bleak but I‘ve got to still hold onto the hope and to congratulate myself for trying even though it was hard, it was something!

I also emailed an online shopping place to see if they could reimburse the price difference on an item I bought recently which went on sale soon after which I really didn’t want to do, but my sis prompted me to as she’d seen many people try this with sometimes good results. So I did do it and even though I knew they were likely to not be able to do anything about it, at least I tried and that is something! I was scared to, but went for it. I mean their response still hurt a little, but it was mostly what I was expecting to get and was very professional. 

I need to keep pushing myself to just try in all sorts of things. Even if it’s scary, even if it hurts to think about what might be the outcome, I just need to try or I’ll miss the chance for even good things to happen too.

My other sort of homework was to practice and actually help out with phone orders at my parent’s work place. This is something I’ve been wanting to do and something my parents have been wanting me to do for a long time but I’m just so scared of it, phone calls are just something I’ve always avoided in the past because I get so awkward and panicky. 

In the session we did a small pretend/hypothetical phone order scene thing where she was the customer and I was prompted to just say what I would and it was easier than I thought kinda. I was jumping ahead and worrying about her asking certain things I often hear customers say (when other people answer it) but she never asked it. She told me I was working myself up by predicting something that may or may not even happen (just like in that cycle diagram). She said to be in the moment and not think past it, just go with the flow kind of thing and everything will be peachy and it’s well, pretty true if I think about other phone calls I’ve made like the one above where I was expecting them to ask certain things and was super anxious but they never even asked those things (or well not in the detail I was expecting) lol.

I think... I think I can do it. I mean, I know I’m capable. I just have to get past the fear of my family judging me, me asking them for help or me getting things jumbled and getting in trouble. I even tried to do another pretend practice conversation with my sis but neither of us took it seriously (or well maybe that was my fault for goofing around) and I wanted to look over the material so I was prepared but I just ahhh xAx I think I’m overcomplicating things again. There’s only one day left to try and then I’m at my 5th appointment. I’m worried she’ll be disappointed in me, but is’s just so nerve-wracking taking the first step into something scary like that. At least I’ll have done one of the two things I needed to do though. I need to psych myself up some more, toughen up and put all the negative behind me. I wonder if I’ll be able to do it before then... @~@ Maybe I’ll get my sis for more practice or moral support.

I’ve been wanting to try posting my other misc stuff on my other accounts and changed the name/urls again for the millionth time. I am a little happier with them than before but still iffy and overly anxious, over thinking to the max again. It’s true, I’ll never be happy and I’ll never move forward if I’m always second guessing myself, reaching for the unattainable perfection, being scared of failure, letting the past haunt me and the unforeseeable future scare me. 

I made a small step forward and it was better than nothing. I am finally starting to see the worth in my creations, to see the beauty (uhh) past the imperfections and I wish I could say that about myself too but that’s going to need to take a long while more. As always baby steps, baby steps all the way until I can buy a fancy tricycle or one of those electric mini cars LOL XD

About the way I keep mentioning time and me wasting it, I mentioned this to the counsellor also and she helped me realise that no time is wasted and that there is nothing lost when meeting with failure either. Learning from mistakes, moving slowly, it’s all okay. If I can keep going, even if I screw up, I’ll have the knowledge to do better next time and I’ll prove myself wrong and break the cycle. I can do things, I can do everything I want to do, I just gotta believe in myself and not let the bumps on my journey slow me to a stop ^^

Wow this post grew quite a bit in length. I thought I wouldn’t be able to do it! I’m sure there’s lots I’ve missed out, but it doesn’t matter, I feel I’ve done more than enough. I did it yay! Listening to the relaxing/concentration/meditation music really really works wonders! I still haven’t gotten round to making a nice playlist of it darn ><

Now to go worry about the phone order thing some more... :’< I kid, or am I srs ack! I’ll figure it out! Whatever happens, or doesn’t happen, I'll make sure to not be too hard on myself for it!

Time to try be more productive! Or maybe relax some more, who knows! Yolo! XD

Go go me! (and go go you!) ^^