#I’m not complaining. I think it’s funny that it does a bunch of stuff that isn’t explained and makes me go

[boypussydilf]

the idea that simon just needs to find a way to have magic and be sane is one of the most egregiously thoughtless missing-the-entire-point takes i’ve ever seen. with my disclaimer that i’m not remotely endorsing or seriously suggesting this: i’m surprised no one’s mentioned the fact that we’ve multiple times seen people use the crown’s magic without any of the mental effect. after flame princess destroys most of the ice kingdom, IK gives the crown to gunter to rebuild it, and again in thanks for the crabapples guiseppe, he gives it to abracadaniel and it lets him use ice magic just fine. the crown only has its full effect on one person at a time, and doesn’t seem to bond to a new wearer until the current one is dead… but it’ll give anyone who wears it magic.

In conclusion obviously the solution is for Simon to just take an ice crown that’s already being used (:

[silly-honeybee]

What Blue Lock boys would get you for Christmas🎁

~🐝 Happy late Christmas my lovely sillies! I have been rlly busy lately so I haven’t had time to write💔 so I hope you enjoy this lil headconon on what the Blue Lock boys would get you for Christmas!

~~~

Characters: Bachira, Isagi, Chigiri, Nagi, Kunigami, Reo, Kaiser, Alexis, Hiori

Headcanon ~ Fluffy fluff ~ fem!reader ~ not proofread

Warning(?): mentions of bras and panties in Kunigami’s part. (don’t know if that makes anyone uncomfy or not so I’m putting this here)

~~~

start~~~🐝

Bachira Meguru

Silly things. He’d get you some silly and unnecessary things—

Like he’d probably get you a shirt saying “I love pizza” or something stupid😭

But he’d also get you some pretty cute things.

Anything matching, plushies, shirts, bracelets, etc..

He is indeed a goofball(we love him for that), but of course he knows how to give serious gifts(somewhat)..

The wrapping would be horrible, I gotta say that.. probably a bunch of holes basically revealing what the present was before you even opened it.. (he’s trying his best)

Oh well, whatever he gets you just know that he means it with a lot of love💕

Isagi Yoichi

He’d probably get you nice things for the winter, like a fuzzy sweater, scarf, boots..

Or he’d find a cute dress that he thinks would look nice on you, if you don’t like dresses then a cute pair of shorts or pants..

But, in general he would make sure to get you something he knew you liked, he thinks about you a lot, yk? ^^

(This is rlly short I’m sorry🙏)

Chigiri Hyoma

This man will spoil you.

You like Sanrio? Sanrio it is. You want makeup? Makeup it is. You want the full series of your favorite book? Books it is!

He never disappoints on Christmas, he knows what you like even if you haven’t told him—

Like he just noticed a certain detail of you having quite a few of this and that. He’d then proceed to Google about it and then find nice things from it🫶

Nagi Seishiro

He’d probably be a little clueless on knowing what you’d want.. (not in a rude way).

So what he does is probably look back on the comments you made on certain characters you two have played in a game or what not. And the ones you liked he’d find some merch of that character..

Kunigami Rensuke

He’d definitely be brave enough to casually walk into the woman’s section of Target and get you a brand new bra and panties.

Based on his sister’s at home, they always seem to complain about their bras becoming loose and slack after a year..

So he assumes that maybe that happens with you too? He wants you to be comfy at all times💕

(I love this man😭)

Reo Mikage

He’d also spoil you like Chigiri, but probably in a more *ehem* Reo way..

Like he’d get you tons of stuff, too much to count. This man has money💰🤑

Every. One. Of. Those. Gifts. Have been thoroughly thought through as he was buying them.

He wanted to make sure everything was perfect💝

Michael Kaiser

Probably getting you something fancy..

A fancy robe, shoes, dress, etc..

Would also treat you to a restaurant date, Egon or something idk 🤷‍♀️

Alexis Ness

He’d get you anything you want😭

He’s such a sweetheart about it too, he would wrap your gifts in cute wrapping paper.

Every one of the gifts having a little tag in the shape of a heart saying: “To my love, from Alexis💕”

He’s such a cutie istg😭🙏

Hiori Yo

You two probably played animal crossing at some point together, so he’d definitely get you a plushie of whichever one was your favorite character!

He probably would accidentally reveal the gift before you opened it.. oopsie💕

~~~🐝 end

~🐝 I’m so sorry if some of these were short😭 like idk how to write for Kaiser,I sagi or Nagi- and there is no Rin included here bc I have no idea how to write for him🧍‍♀️ anyway! I wish you sillies a lovely rest of 2023💕

See you guys next year😋🙏 (I’m so funny haha)

Also look at this Bachira plush I got for Christmas AAAAAAA MY BBY😭 MWA MWA💋💋💋

[modelbus]

MODEL HELP-

i just typed a long ass message and it all deleted itself-

question, do you think you want to do another part on cut chaos? No pressure ofc, but I’d be cool! (I have a bunch of ideas for it I’ll send seperate (maybe) feel free to ignore them but like free crappy inspo man)

Request: Y/N is a part of SBI but they aren’t treated that great by the fandom or really the rest of the group. Its not like SBI MEANS to disregard the ‘hate’ towards Y/N like its nothing but they tend to dismiss or just ignore it, of course, they are still really close and care about Y/N, it still just hurts a little that they ignore it. But where the creators don’t realise they’re neglecting their friends emotions, the fans? They are fully aware they constantly joke about Y/N being the worst member of SBI. They are fully aware they also always ‘joke’ about forgetting Y/N exists. They are fully aware that despite Y/N being in as many if not more ‘SBI’ streams or videos than the other creators, they act as if they’re not actually a part of SBI. They are fully aware many of them aren’t joking when they say Y/N is not a member of SBI, or when they say they wish Y/N would stop showing up to streams. They are fully aware that the main ‘joke’ people think of when they think SBI is something along the lines of; “Whos Y/N?” or “Y/N is SO the middle child of the SBI, we all forget them!” or “Y/N? Ohhh you mean the one that’s annoying but its not funny!” .. When the SBI are streaming bedwars 2v2v2’s with a random viewer each game and that viewer happens to end up on Y/N’s team (and be an asshole) they, of course, decide to complain that out of every member they could be teamed with, they got the worst member of SBI! (Even though Y/N and techno practice pvp together regularly and the only person in SBI Y/N can’t kill is techno) While Y/N does what they always do and laughs it off with a SICK comeback (despite how much it hurts when they realise they expected that kind of reaction to being teamed with them), the rest of the SBI seems to snap as though that was their final straw (starting with tommy yelling ‘THATS BULLSHIT’ or smth) and all collectively go on a rant about how shitty most(?) fans treat Y/N, to Y/N’s surprise most of all of the fives chats are agreeing..? Y/N starts to realise maybe they aren’t as hated as they thought.. and maybe, just maybe, they are a lot more loved then they realised.

MODEL I’M SO SORRY MY REQUESTS ARE ALWAYS SO LONG-

Its funny how I’m not motivated to write actual fics but I can write 800 word requests-

LOVE YOU AND YOUR WORK!!!

✨🌌🌙 Annon-

I’d love to write more for Cut Chaos! My writing has been all over the place lately because I’ve been really busy (school stuff :/) but I do enjoy writing for that (not-so) little series

Pairing: Gn!Reader X CC!SBI (Tommy, Techno, Phil, Wilbur)

Found Fury

You aren’t unfamiliar with the term unwanted. If anything, you’ve burrowed yourself a home in the word, splitting it in two. Accepted yourself for what you are.

Quite honestly, if there was a record for ‘most hated SBI member’ it’d go to you. Actually, it wouldn’t, considering how most people don’t even see you as a member of SBI. The forgettable middle child, adrift alone.

There wasn’t much you could do except accept it.

Bothering the others with it was unfathomable. Besides, they’ve surely seen some hint of it. They aren’t quite that blind, even if Wilbur and Techno do wear glasses. And, seeing as how they haven’t said a word… maybe it’s best if you didn’t nag about it.

It’s not that you’re partial to the so-called ‘suffering in silence,’ because you really aren’t. But you’re uniquely acquainted with brushing things off, pretending that your friends’ continued silence doesn’t sting and that being excluded from the group isn’t heart-wrenching. In the end, who really cares what strangers online think?

You can ignore the messages in your inboxes. The emails to your professional email asking if you’re really a part of SBI. All the replies to all your posts. Every fucking comment on every video you’re in.

Sometimes, it piles around you so high that you can’t see past it. Words strung together to form sentences that rephrase ‘Who even are you’ a thousand times. Or the more creative, ‘How do you manage to be unfunny AND annoying’ mixed with a side of scorn. It’s worse when it trends on Twitter after a stream, but who are you to complain?

After all, you’re just lucky to be following SBI around according to Twitter. Blessed to be in their fucking presence.

For the most part, you just hire more mods. And they’re pretty strict with bans, so your chat tends to err on the positive side. Everyone else’s? Well, let’s just say there’s a reason you don’t have their chats open.

Today is no exception.

Bedwars with viewers, everyone being randomly set into 2v2v2. Tommy’s idea, although he’s lost every round that Techno wasn’t on his team. That was mostly due to you sneak attacking him while he targeted Techno, but still.

“POTATOMAN!” Tommy shouts, practically bursting your eardrums. “YOU ARE THE CHOSEN ONE!”

“Christ, mate.” Phil laughs.

“…my ears…” Techno mourns quietly, making both you and Wilbur laugh.

“We’re getting in! We’re getting in!” Tommy says excitedly, and everyone spawns into their teams.

Your heart sinks when you realize you’re with the viewer on white team. Their character, a potato in a suit, stares at you as you walk backward to collect iron and gold from the generator.

You’ve been lucky up until this far, always getting placed with one of the others. Logically, you knew you’d eventually be placed with the random, but part of you still hoped. Still dared to relax into the game.

Potatoman’s character stands there for a few minutes, and you buy wool with your iron.

“Funnel me the gold, Tommy.” Techno says calmly.

“No! Fuck off! This is my gold!”

“You’re just going to walk off the edge with it!”

“No I won’t! When have I ever?!”

“Last game.” Wilbur inputs.

“Wha— I was pushed! That’s different!”

A message pops up in game chat, and your eyes flick to it for a moment, too busy with building a bed defense. When you realize it isn’t Tommy’s death message (it would’ve been really funny, let’s be honest), you do a double take to read it.

<Potatoman> My luck omg

Your eyebrows raise. For a split second, you dare to hope that the viewer is a fan of yours. That they want to be on a team with you. Hope is a dangerous thing; it just makes things worse when it dies.

<Potatoman> Stuck with the worst member &lt;Potatoman> Not even a member fr lmaooo

Ah. And there it is.

Seeing the messages doesn't hurt; it's the fact that you knew to expect it right from the start.

That's not to say you're even the worst member, because in PvP you're a God. Hell, you and Techno train it all the time for fun! Even Tommy cheers when he gets teamed with you in PvP games like this. Being teamed with you for Bedwars was a pretty good thing, in theory.

Always in theory.

Because somehow, someway, you're never liked enough. Never enough for the viewers in general, even. Too annoying, too loud, too imperfect, too showy, too quiet, too anything. And you know to expect that feedback rather than to expect any semblance of compliments.

"At least the so-called 'worst member' didn't walk off the edge, unlike someone on my team." You quip, targeting your words at the viewer.

"Heh?" Techno asks.

"Oh, uh, nothing-"

"Look in chat." Wilbur interrupts.

There's a pause, then:

"THAT'S BULLSHIT!" Tommy screams into his mic. "WHAT THE HELL?!"

"I'm agreeing with the kid here." Techno sighs.

"Actually, we really should talk about how the fans have been online. It's not even a recent thing." Phil says, his calm a stark contrast to Tommy.

"I've seen it a lot too. Let's be clear; everyone here is part of the Sleepy Bois. I made it, I make the rules." Wilbur declares.

"You did not make it!" Tommy protests, but Wilbur doesn't stop for him.

"To make it clear, we won't tolerate any hate of anyone in this group, especially not to the extent that we've been seeing recently."

Your eyes glance over at your chat, already stunned, only to have your jaw slacken when you see that your chat is spamming hearts and "YESYESYES."

"Guys, you don't have to... do this." You try.

"I'm pretty sure we do." Techno deadpans, and you can practically imagine the optifine zoom on his character's face he's probably doing/

"The fans treat you like shit, and we're all tired of it." Wilbur agrees. "It's stupid."

"They're all internet assholes." Tommy chimes in, this time at a reasonable volume.

"So from here on out, anyone who says mean shit to you gets banned. From all of our chats." Your eyes go wide at Phil's words, and you quickly pull up his and Tommy's streams to see what their chats are saying.

But... that can't be right. The outpouring of agreement can't be right. The fans all hate you, you know this. There's no way they're agreeing with Phil, Tommy, Techno, and Wil.

So you open Wilbur's chat, then pull up a YouTube tab for Techno's stream too.

Agreement floods every chat, and for just a moment you can't breathe. You were the supposed forgotten middle child, the one nobody cares to stand up for. But that was wrong, wasn't it?

You are part of the Sleepy Bois, and you're just as deserving as everyone else. Of the fans, of the support, of being able to open chat and not see overwhelming hate.

Of being loved.

[goldenempyrean]

𝐌𝐲 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭 𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭!

〚 Main Masterlist || Request Here 〛

Hey, hey! I decided that instead of having a bunch of separate prompt lists it’d be easier to have one big one. So I combined all my prompt lists together to make one big list. This means I can just reblog whenever new ones are added! So same deal as usual, if you wanna request just pick some things from this list with your character choice :D 

>〚 Request Here! 〛  <

〘 totally feel free to reblog this list and to use it in your own writing too 〙 

𝐒𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐞 𝐃𝐢𝐚𝐥𝐠𝐨𝐮𝐞: 

“I don't feel well.” 

“I'm fine. Stop worrying” 

“Relax, it's just a cold.” 

“I'm not sick. I literally do not get sick” 

“I think I'm coming down with something.” 

“Its just allergies!” (Totally isn't) 

“No. I don't have hayfever.” 

“Can we take a bath together?” 

“Does my forehead feel warm to you?” 

“I’ve missed you today.” 

“I can't be sick right now! I have so much stuff I need to do” 

“Is it cold in here, or is it just me?” 

“Is it warm in here, or is it just me?” 

“Baby, can you pass me the tissues?” 

“Don't freak out but...” 

“I’d keep your distance babe, this is pretty gross.” 

“Do we have any coughdrops?” 

"Cmon, you know I don’t get sick.“ 

"My head feels funny” 

"I just need some sleep, I’ll be fine" 

"Please stop worrying" 

"Wait!.. Don’t go.“ 

“I’m Wallowing in self-pity.” 

"Couldn’t you keep your cold to yourself?“ 

"Stay still, you’re making me dizzy.” 

"…The central heating broke.“ 

"I’ll rest later! I have really important work stuff to finish.” 

*sniff* “No, I don’t need a tissue.” 

“Woah… Why is the room spinning?” 

“Tissues are for sick people!” 

 “This isnt fair! Germs should see me and run the opposite way” 

“You infected me.” 

“I caught your stupid cold!” 

*sniff* “We ran out of tissues.” 

“Don't come too close. You don’t wanna catch this.” 

“I'm really gross right now.” 

“Can we shower together?” 

“I didn’t want to ruin our plans…” 

“I don’t need you to check my temperature, Im fine!” 

“I thought the medicine was non-drowsy…” 

“I’m not drinking it! It tastes disgusting!” 

“Can we cuddle?” 

“I don’t think I can walk straight right now.” 

“If you keep kissing me then you’re going to catch this junk.” 

“I think that maybe…possibly… I might be sick.” 

 “Can we please just snuggle on the sofa?” 

“I'm just trying to get all this work done! I have no time to rest.” 

 “You’re overreacting, Im fine!” 

“All I’ve done today is catch your cold!” 

“You don’t need to worry about me sweetie.” 

“I’ve felt worst.” 

“You probably shouldn’t kiss me.” 

“Hey! Your gonna catch this now.” 

“Do I look okay to you?” 

“I must look a mess…” 

“I’m not really feeling too hot.” 

“This can't be happening-“ 

“Can you budge up, I wanna lay with you.” 

“You need to stop worrying about me.” 

“Im going back to bed.”   

“I can see you staring at me. You’re not discreet y’know?”   

“Naps are only for babies and old people. Im neither.”   

“I felt funny this morning, but it wasn’t this bad.”   

“I don't care what you talk about, can you just keep talking?” 

“I'm a little out of it today.”   

“We need to buy more tissues.”   

“I do not have a cold!” 

“I can't use toilet paper, it makes my nose get all chapped!”   

“I'm not pouting…”   

“I'm allowed to be miserable.”   

“Oh Im sorry. Is my sickness bothering you?”   

“You worry too much.”  

“Are you sure? I don’t want you to get sick.” 

“It’s a cold. I’ll live.”   

“Hey! Don’t tease me whilst I'm sick!” 

“You gonna nurse me back to health?” 

“I'm not feeling too hot.” 

“You better not complain when you catch this.”   

“I'm just a little under the weather that’s all.”   

“I said I was fine.”   

“I don’t need you to nurse me, I'm perfectly fine.”   

“Y’know… I heard cuddles can cure colds quick.” 

“I sneezed twice, is that a crime?”   

“You’re not going to drop this, are you?”   

“You didn’t have to go through all this trouble.”   

“It's just a silly little cold.”   

“Do you actually think I’ve had time to go out and get a flu-shot?”   

“It's chaos here. I can't just stop working because I have the sniffles.”   

“I want a hug.”   

“Don’t get lost in the sea of tissues.”   

“I'm not grumpy.”   

“Sharing is caring afterall.”   

“Can you just shut up for a second?”   

“That medicine tastes gross.” 

“I just can't stop sneezing!” 

“I don’t get colds.” 

“You don’t need to take care of me, I’ll be fine.” 

“You’re really sweet for wanting to look after me like this.” 

“I totally just got my germs all over you!” 

“We were meant to go out tonight!” 

“I didn’t want to cancel on you…” 

“Is it obvious..?” 

“Did you come home just to look after me?” 

“Aw, you made me soup?” 

“You’re literally my favourite person on earth right now.” 

“Can I lie on you?” 

“Can you turn the lights off, they’re giving me a migraine.” 

“I think I caught that bug you had.” 

“How long was I asleep?” 

“My boss won't let me take a sick day.” 

“I can take care of myself, thank you very much.”

"Why are you laughing at my misery?"

“Are you seriously going to say bless you every single time I sneeze?”

“I think I’m catching something.”

“I don’t want you to get sick too.”

“For the hundredth time, I am not sick!"

“I don’t don’t have time or energy to be sick right now.”

“Can you please stop pacing, you’re making me dizzy.”

“You gonna nurse me back to health then, Show me some bedside manner?”

“Jeez, if thats your beside manner, I’d rather take my chances on my own.”

“I can feel you drawing shapes on my back… it’s nice.”

“Maybe I should get you sick too so we can be miserable together.”

“I can’t tell if this movie is just boring or its because I’m sick but I’m really sleepy.”

“You’ll stay here while I sleep?”

“You’re hovering…”   

༘ ⋆｡˚ ✧ ˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚ ✧ ˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚ ✧ ˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚    

𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐫 𝐃𝐢𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞:  

“You feeling alright?” 

“Bless you! Are you sure you're ok? You never sneeze this much.” 

“Babe, im saying this in the nicest way possible, you look like shit” 

“Your cheeks are flushed” 

“Let me feel your forehead.” 

“We need to get that fever down.” 

“I’ve never seen you this sick.” 

“So much for your perfect immune system.” 

“We’re going back inside.” 

“Jeez, you look half-dead.” 

“Let's get home so we can get you feeling better.” 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“Your health isn't a joke.” 

“Thats it. You're going to bed.” 

“Let's just cuddle” 

“Your never usually so quiet.” 

“Aw, you're all sniffly.” 

“Wow. Bless you! That didn't sound too good.” 

“I'm going to take care of you.” 

“Would you like some tea?” 

"You look like death warmed over.“  "Bless you!… since when do you sneeze more than once?” 

"I’m getting you something for that fever.“ 

"Make sure you wear something warm.” 

"You’re going to catch your death out here.“ 

"Slow down, you’re slurring your words.” 

"I’m going to run you a bath.“ 

"Baby you're shivering.” 

"Your eyes are glassy.“ 

"Aw, your nose is all red.” 

"You know we own tissues for a reason, right?“ 

"You need some more rest.” 

"What are you doing up? You’re supposed to be in bed.“ 

"How did you get manage to get this sick, this fast” 

"Date night can wait, your health is what’s important.“ 

"Blow your nose, I can’t understand what you’re trying to say.” 

You can’t drive home in your condition.” 

”There’s no way you’re going to stay home alone like this.” 

“Please let me look after you.” 

“You shouldn’t be embarrassed, everybody gets sick.” 

“Please just sit down for a moment.” 

“I’m not going to take that personally, your high on meds.” 

“You shouldn’t be walking around when you’re this sick.” 

“You can barely stand, nevermind go out and do a full day’s work.” 

“If you sneeze one more time, I’m going to start getting worried.” 

“Baby… Are you sick?” 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“Do you need me to get you anything?” 

“How about we just snuggle and watch some movies.” 

”Bless you… Bless you! Are you okay- bless you again!” 

“It’s not like you to get this sick.” 

“You really should be resting.” 

“Please just lay down for me baby.” 

“Here, let me help you.” 

“Can you make it back to the bedroom?” 

“Hmm… I’m keeping my eye on you.” 

“You’ll feel better if you go and lie down.” 

“Stop sniffling and go blow your nose.” 

“Maybe you should just take it easy.” 

“Your too stubborn for your own good.” 

“You sound like you could use some more sleep.” 

“God bless you!” 

“Aw sweetie, your nose is all runny.” 

“Somebody’s certainly sneezy today.” 

“You’re not feeling well… are you?” 

“Your shivering baby.” 

“You’re sweating.” 

“You’re definitely running a fever.” 

“I’m going to need to take your temperature.” 

“You should take my jacket.” 

“Hey, hey, we can worry about that once you’re feeling better.” 

“You’re past the contagious phase… right?” 

“Make sure to drink plenty of fluids.” 

“Let’s just have a lazy day.” 

“Was it really worthy getting soaked?” 

“I told you to wear something warm.” 

“Are these flowers bothering you?” 

“Baby, I think this is more than just the sniffles.” 

“There’s no way that you’d make it past lunch in your condition.” 

“We could shower together if that’d make you feel any better.” 

“The steam will help with your congestion.” 

“Goodness, you look like your about to pass out.” 

“Baby you’re delirious.” 

“Let’s just get you home and into bed.” 

“Its your fever that’s making you feel cold.” 

“We should really get you in a cool bath.” 

“You can’t work in your condition.” 

“There’s no need to worry. I have everything covered, just relax.” 

“Wait… You’re not allergic to that, are you?” 

“I didn’t know you had cat allergies!” 

“Want me to make you some soup?” 

“Do you need me to carry you?” 

“You’ve been sniffling all day.” 

“Do you need any extra blankets?” 

“Baby please let me take you home.” 

“I have tissues in the car.” 

“You can sleep in the car, don’t worry, I’ll wake you up when we’re there.” 

“You’re not ruining anything.” 

“You should really try and eat something.” 

“Those sniffles of yours really turning into something, huh?” 

”There's way you're going out. Not with that cold.” 

“You’re looking a bit pale sweetheart.”

“Use a tissue for god's sake!”   

“You’re not one to go quiet, what's up?”   

“My poor baby is all sniffly, aren’t you?”   

“Oh honey… You can't be outside like this.”   

“Don’t be offended or anything. But you look horrible.”   

“I think you caught my cold…”   

“It sounds like you’ve caught that bug going round.”   

“You’re in bed early. You feeling alright?”   

“Oh my god. You’re completely burning up!”   

“I think your fever is spiking.”   

“We should get you into bed.”   

“Cmon, let's get you into the shower.”   

“You need a tissue?”   

“Jeez, blow your nose before you drown in your own mucus.”   

“Don’t worry, I'm gonna take care of you.”   

“How long have you been like this?”   

“If you’re trying to be subtle, I'm sorry but you’re doing an awful job.”   

“I bet I could toast a marshmallow on your forehead.”   

“I think you have the flu, nobody’s ever this sick with a cold.” 

“Want some ice cream for your throat?”   

“We’re going home, right now.”   

“Come on, let's get you wrapped in warm.” 

“Let’s get you in the shower.” 

“We’re gonna stop at the pharmacy, okay?”   

“You can sleep in the car.”   

“You’re home early?” 

“Do you not see how pale you are right now?”   

“Let's get you into bed.”   

“Cut the crap. I know you’re sick.”   

“Hush now, otherwise you’re going to lose your voice.” 

“I don’t think that’s exactly hygienic.”   

“You’re kinda cute when you’re all sick and needy like this.” 

“I'm now going to give you some tissues and pretend I never saw that.”   

“You need to wear something warmer.”   

“If you don’t get into bed willingly then I will personally carry you there.”   

“I thought you said that you were feeling better?”   

“You don’t need to be embarrassed; you’re allowed to be sick.”   

“Are the rumours true, is the (name) actually sick?”   

“I’d kiss you right now if you weren’t contagious.” 

“Your too stubborn for your own good.” 

“Let me take care of you.”   

“I told you that you should stay home from work today.” 

“Okay Ms I’m-not-sick, tell me why you sneezed five times in the span of an hour.” 

“Are you done pretending you’re fine?” 

“The only place you’re going is back to bed.” 

“I know, sweetie, but you have to take it so your fever goes down.” 

“Did you manage to get much sleep? I heard you tossing and turning all night.” 

“You might be coming down with something....”

“You’ve really got the sniffles today, haven’t you?”

“I’m not leaving you until i know you’re better, and that’s final.”

"When were you planning to tell me you were sick?"

"You're sick. If you overexert yourself, you're gonna get sicker."

“Great… Now I have your germs all over me.”

“I swear to god, If you don’t get back in bed, I will physically drag you there.”

[scarlet-fantasies]

Being Best Friends With Zeke HCS

::Description::

Zeke as your best friend and just him being a handful.

::𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬:: cringe

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

𝑃𝑟𝑜𝑚𝑝𝑡

𝐼𝑛𝑏𝑜𝑥 𝑖𝑠 𝑜𝑝𝑒𝑛

𝐶𝑙𝑖𝑐𝑘 𝑡𝑜 𝑗𝑜𝑖𝑛 --> 𝑇𝑎𝑔𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

© 𝑠𝑐𝑎𝑟𝑙𝑒𝑡-𝑓𝑎𝑛𝑡𝑎𝑠𝑖𝑒𝑠 // 𝑑𝑜 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑎𝑙, 𝑟𝑒𝑢𝑠𝑒, 𝑟𝑒𝑝𝑜𝑠𝑡 𝑜𝑛𝑡𝑜 𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑠𝑖𝑡𝑒𝑠. 𝑎𝑙𝑙 𝑤𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑖𝑑𝑒𝑎𝑠 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑜𝑟𝑖𝑔𝑖𝑛𝑎𝑙 𝑢𝑛𝑙𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑤𝑖𝑠𝑒. // 2021-𝑃𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑒𝑛𝑡.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If I’m being honest this is the most obnoxious friendship to ever exist.

He’s known you for way to long and is sooo quirky.

Like you see the text messages? That’s how crazy it gets between you two.

He always gets so philosophical and you sometimes just get so fed up with his bull want to tell him to shut up 😂 mostly bc you know he’s just trying to troll.

Although he means well.

As you’re best friend he knows everything about you and you vice versa.

Like he knows everything, dates, crushes, ex’s, all times you feel like you’ve failed, your accomplishments, and even your most shameful moments.

He even remembers something as dumb as you tripping over something from two years ago.

“Remember when you tripped over my math book?”

“How do you remember these things?!?” You’d complain.

He even remembers things like your middle name, the teachers you’ve had and even something dumb like the first two words you exchanged when you got to know him.

He’s very detail oriented on pointless shit and it’s just funny.

Aside from this he’s very corny and quirky as we can see with the text messages.

He makes a lot of dumb jokes as he likes to get on your nerves.

It’s always fun to him.

Even if he acts like he’s offended by your insults he actually lives for them.

And he just loves you.

Though he acts like a dork/asshole he’d do anything for you.

Something he likes to do is take photos because he wants to hold a lot of memories and let me tell you, you’re in a lot of these pics.

I could literally see him vlogging and he just randomly involved you in it somehow because you’re his bff.

He believe it or not he is able to cook so he’d probably make cute things with you like the snowman pizza.

Mostly cause he likes cooking and making arts and crafts.

He’s a softie too

He surprises you a lot sometimes it’s gifts and other times it’s just something crazy happening like one time he brought home a bunch of ducks and then swim in the sink.

Which yess was cute but you had no idea why he brought them all or what to do with them.

He also will look though Pinterest to get craft ideas and just do a bunch of like diy stuff.

And always tries to get you to make it with him.

He loves cooking so he randomly makes things sometimes. You also sometimes ask him to cook instead of you bc he’s good at it. Plus on bad days or your birthday he’ll make you your favorite food.

He does steal food from you. Because he believes in the “what’s yours is mine and what’s mine is yours” shit. So it can be annoying which is why you take his jacket with you when your going for a run, steal a shirt, use his laptop/phone for something, and sleep on his bed. Food wise, you make spicy food because he cannot handle it, which gets him off your back 😂

He probably is good at baking or cooking so he sometimes asks you to be his taste tester.

On a bad day he brings snacks and sweets you love.

Takes care of you when you are sick because what are friends for.

Sometimes goes shopping with you and gives advice especially if you’re going on a date.

“I think blue looks better, says a lot more about you.”

“It’s just a color.” You’d say confused.

“Guys don’t see it that way.”

“Guys don’t? Or you don’t?” You’d joke.

If you are near Eren’s age or seem like the kinda girl he’d date you’d best believe Zeke is shipping you two hardcore.

He’d try to get you to hook up and start dating.

One time, he asked you what you thought about him during one of your movie nights when you two were having a snack.

“Hey, what do you think about my brother Eren?” He’d ask, looking at you a little serious.

You’d shake your head looking at him, “Mhh, No, no.”

“What? I’m just asking.” He’d say playing dumb.

“No, Zeke.”

“No but seriously, you two would be cute together.” He’d insist.

“I don’t like him like that.” You’d say.

He’d sigh, “One day you kids will realize it.”

He’d try to scheme the two of you together it just really doesn’t surprise me at all.

Personally Zeke doesn’t seem like the kind of person to have feelings for a girl he his friends with.

However if he and his bff have been friends for over ten years and she’s able to still put up with him he may just end up liking her.

He has thought about it before but pushed it away because he thought he was thinking too much.

If he ended up liking you he’d end up telling you which would be a shock to you.

It would be like those text messages where it says I’m freaking out.

But this doesn’t mean you’re friendship would really change.

You’d still have plenty to laugh about it.

You’ll still be listening to his obnoxious theories and questions about the world at 3am while you’re trying to sleep.

You’ll still participate in his crazy games that he comes up with and put up with all his other antics nonetheless.

People have told him he looks like Jesus and he actually tries to use it as an excuse.

“I saw that.”

“Shut up.”

You once scent him a text saying Jesus crist but it auto corrected to Jesus Crispy.

And he’s never quit ever since.

@sp00ksic0la @bubs-world

::Previous Post::

1

[zylian]

Moments in the Branzy 4 stream that make me kinda insane

—————

Bacon: Did u tell Branzy about ur problem

Zam: No, not yet

Mapicc: What’s ur problem

Zam: I don’t think I will

*Bacon asks again*

Mapicc: Are u struggling with ur identity again PrinceZam?

Zam: Why would u think that-

Mapicc: Because u always are, and than u make a bunch of signs and than u complain for four days and u end up either not doing something or doing something way too drastic for no reason.

Spoke: Tru- Yeah

Bacon: Yeah, kind of fair… his name is Princezam

Zam: Yeah

*Mapicc laughs*

Spoke: wait can we do some lore now, like I’m tired of being funny, can we do some lore now

Zam: *muted* Why does he know me so well, why does he know me SO damn well, that’s so weird

—————

Zam changes skin: It’s me Pussn’boots

*Mapicc turns towards Zam*

*another conversation happening in the background*

Mapicc in a Angry birds skin: And I am Death

—————

*Zam in the Rek centre as Mapicc walks in*

Zam: Hey dude

Mapicc: you know, ah Rekraps obsidian thing still exists

Zam: Really!?

Mapicc: Yah look follow me

Zam: is it buried?! Yah sure

—————

*Clownpierce riding the horse with golden armour*

Bacon: who’s horse is that?

Mapicc: Hors! It’s mine

Zam: Ok

Mapicc: No he’s mine!

*Zam & Clown verbally fighting while with hors*

Mapicc: Hey, pls don’t hurt my horse

—————

Zam: why are the dogs racist

Mapicc: well because they called me a bad word that I can’t repeat on stream

Zam: oh ok

Mapicc: or off stream

—————

Bacon: there’s like a group of players; Spoke, Ash, Vitalasy, his whole team all have access to these weird abilities, to make creative mode and bedrock and barriers and whatever they want, alright. They’re doing stuff with it, there all doing different things and they’re on different sides. Like Mapicc is against Vitalasy and his team, which is eclipse but he’s also teamed with Spoke and they’re team is called Leviathan, So Leviathan and Eclipse hate each other but both have exploiters on each of they’re sides. So it’s a little bit interesting.

Spoke: And yeah jaron

Bacon: what wdym

Spoke: …yknow ur probably part of it!!

*Zam deafens*

Zam: After learning that Spokes on my side, everything he says is like… starting to make sense yknow. It’s like everything he says is to like cover for Vitalasy, yknow. Every joke he makes is like a deflection kind of- like I’ve seen a lot, it’s crazy, he’s like so good at just getting ppl to stop being suspicious of him. Everyone knows it’s him still but he puts suspicion away immediately, it seems like Spoke is like super loyal to Vitalasy.

*Zam undeafens*

Bacon: oh thankgod, we were all sitting in silence until you-

Zam: Oh

—————

Mapicc: Look there’s Spoke

Zam: Oh good job Spoke

Mapicc No, look there Spoke flowers

Zam: Oh I get it, yah

Bacon: Are they gay?

Zam: No

Mapicc: what?!

Bacon: I wasn’t sure what u meant by Spoke flowers

Mapicc: That’s cause there withers, and there’s like an analogy

—————

Branzy: My advice is anytime that you can betray Vitalasy, you just do it

Zam: *chokes into laughter*

—————

[adultswim2021]

The Venture Bros. #20: “Twenty Years to Midnight” | August 6, 2006 – 10:30PM | S02E05

In this episode: Brock stumbles on a box of old shit. Among the items is a video left behind of the senior Dr. Jonas Venture relaying a message to his son with instructions for assembling an important device. It will involve Team Venture going to several locations to secure various parts for this machine. Thank god it's not season one, because this'll require a lotta new backgrounds, baby!

I don't call this one a favorite, but I do think it's really good and has a lot of things going for it. The design of the episode is fairly elegant; it has the plot of a very solid sci-fi adventure film (quietly ignoring that the ending is basically a parody of Contact). The second act has a few strong funny scenes that barely have anything to do with the story. Jonas Jr. and the ghost Pirate from season one (whom we learn is now working for Jonas Jr.) visit a drug-addled Jonny Quest who is living in some kind of underwater pod. Hank and Dean visit Colonel Gentleman who is apparently passed away in his bed. They read his diary that's filled with nonsense.

I'm just observing where the episode COULD be stronger, which is not necessarily the same as complaining. Actually it's exactly the same as complaining. I just don't want to get yelled at. These scenes are funny but I always remembered them separate from this episode. This episode has a strong story and those scenes are fun detours, but it’d be nice if those characters had more bearing on the plot and not just there as a goofy obstacle. They're mostly just stuff happening, driven by the location of a macguffin. I actually found myself saying “oh! So THIS is the episode where this scene comes from!”.

I still consider these scenes a net positive for the episode. It's just imperfect in my eyes because this could be a very good standalone adventure and a gateway episode for new viewers, except for the fact that it does wind up being a bit of a previous-episode-reference fest. This episode directly references events from “Ghosts of the Sargasso” and the third act is a sequel to “Ice Station Impossible”. This could actually have the opposite effect; further intriguing people into visiting the backlog of the series. There WAS a season one DVD for sale.

Actually... now that you mention it: that might be what happened to ME. No shit! I actually remember sort-of half-watching this episode. I was a “person who did not watch Venture Bros.” mostly because of the bad pilot episode and the lukewarm first regular series episode. I did have a positive experience watching the first Burger King Have It Your Way marathon, which included a small handful of season one Venture Bros. episodes. I do credit that night for helping thaw the freeze-out I was perpetrating on my now-beloved brothers.

I remember half-watching this episode, and hearing Stephen Colbert's voice, and thinking “wow, Stephen Colbert is on this show sometimes? I should probably watch it?” (NOTE TO YOUNGER READERS: Before Stephen Colbert did limpdick lib comedy for CBS he was a highly-respected subversive comedy writer and performer that none of us knew was a Christian). Even though I remember having this thought about this episode, I still considered this the “try before you buy” phase.

Somebody else already made this point, which is why I'm tacking it onto the end of my write-up: The scene where Hank and Dean discover Colonel Gentleman dead (or is he?) and go through his stuff, they leaf through his journal and find a bunch of inane lists, like “TOYS HE WISHES HE HAD AS A KID”, “GOOD NAMES FOR AN IMAGINARY FRIEND” and “HOLLYWOOD ACTRESSES THAT COULD USE A GOOD PUNCH IN THE MOUTH”. The very smart point, which I nearly passed off as my own until I remembered somebody on twitter did already, is that this is basically what clickbait articles are now. That guy was ironically presaging the future of the internet. It somehow wasn't badly writing up cartoons for a tumblr blog that nobody reads.

Oh! Also: the Jonny Quest scene was maybe the last explicit reference to the Ventureverse and the Questiverse being one-and-the-same. They kept this character but only refered to him as “Action Jonny” after this, I’m pretty sure. Remember when I promised to watch every episode of Jonny Quest in preparation for this? Whatever happened to that idea? I wonder.

EPHEMERA CORNER:

Ed's Burger King "Have It Your Way" Lineup (August 5, 2006)

Speaking of the Burger King “Have It Your Way” marathon! This happened! It was all anime. The end! Nothing else to say! Bye bye Ed!

[frienderbender]

3, 10, 11, aaaaand 14 for the ask game. For ship perhaps.... murdertooth. Da boys. If not you can do my favorite bestie worsties (Rikki and Nikki)

Obligatory OTP Asks

i can do both because they both mean everything to me :’) be ready because you chose two pairs that i have like. so much shit to say about.

Do they wear the other’s clothes? (sweatshirt, bandana, necklace, etc.)

toki/will: yes but not in a cutesy way😭 they steal each other’s stuff all the time (not just clothes) and whenever they catch the other with it they just having annoying arguments about it. they DO have matching planet piss t-shirts though, for what it’s worth.

rikki/nikki: all the time! i’ve drawn this multiple times because it’s very dear to me. rikki puts on her clothes whenever he runs out of stuff to wear on laundry days, and because he thinks it’s funny. nikki thinks it’s funny for about .05 seconds but then she’s mad he’s stretching out her top. also sometimes he looks better in it than she does and she does NOT like that! nikki will wear his old shirts as pajamas. she also has merch shirts of his that she’ll wear if he asks nicely😌

Describe their first date.

toki/will: toki and will are the guys that didn’t even realize they were a couple until much later. they’d been on plenty of outings that would absolutely be first dates for anyone else, had plenty of late night heart-to-hearts, etc then realized way later like. oh i guess we’re a couple?? i think their first “official” date they just got a bunch of beer and drove out somewhere where they could throw the bottles when they were empty

rikki/nikki: i drew it!!!!! the first thing rikki asked her out to do was to hear him perform but their first real date was dinner then clubbing then walking on the beach then going back to his place.

Do either try to hide their emotions if upset? Can the other still tell?

toki/will: i think THEY think they’re good at hiding their emotions but. no. they’re both sensitive, just in different ways. they’re both complainers for sure. toki expresses things a lot more openly and loudly, while will tends to pout and brood. they can definitely tell when something’s up with the other but getting the other to fess up can be a whole other thing, especially for will🙄

rikki/nikki: rikki can put on the act for others but he can’t hide it from nikki. he just can’t. he feels things in extremes and they’ve known each other for too fucking long, not to mention that i don’t think he likes to hide things from her. nikki, on the other hand, doesn’t wear her emotions on her sleeve like rikki does, and can hide things from him better. that said, i think being with rikki actually helped her learn how to express her true feelings better. in general they’re pretty open about things so there’s not really any secrets between them.

How do their personalities compliment each other? How do they clash?

toki/will: toki and will enable each other in the best, funniest way. it’s a dynamic that’s rooted in like. being the odd man out. being the last person standing. always being left behind. and so it’s like. well. you might as well have each other’s back, because no one else does! they’re on the same, weird wavelength most of the time and i think all things considered they work well together. miscommunication happens, obviously, but they’re still each other’s go-to person whenever they wanna do something. they definitely butt heads at times because i think they both get frustrated easily. they dream big and when those aren’t met immediately, it’s easiest to blame the only other person in the room (when it’s probably BOTH their faults). all that to say, murdertooth is good and it falls into a lot of the “you’re the only bitch who can handle me” type dynamics i find fun. it’s also something i’m getting my hopes up for in regards to the movie like THEMATICALLY?? murdertooth makes so much sense. let toki revive will please brendon i don’t ask for much just give me that plea—

rikki/nikki: god i feel like i’ve talked about this. so much. it only makes sense they were meant to go to together because i created nikki SPECIFICALLY for rikki. they’re tuned in to each other’s needs, they’re extremely loyal, and they play into each other’s strengths. rikki, especially when he was younger and just starting out, needed someone more pragmatic and could keep him grounded but who wasn’t a stick in the mud. someone who loved to have the same wild fun as him, but who would still make sure he’d wake up for work the next morning. nikki, who’d been used to putting on masks her whole life, needed someone who could allow her to lower her defenses and love her for her real self, not for the image she puts out. that said, being together for like 15+ years definitely means they’ve clashed plenty of times and will continue to do so. it’s only natural. during his early days of sobriety (pre-rebranding though), he was unconsciously jealous of her still having a career, and assumed that she saw him as an embarrassment. not to mention it was nikki who would have to get him out of trouble, so that took a toll. they have their ups and downs like any relationship does, but i think they do have a genuinely unbreakable bond.

but on a lighter note, their artistic tastes could not be more different😭 she’s like your music taste makes no sense!! and he’s like your music taste is so basic!! then they have sex.

[casliveblog]

Custom Toonami Block Week 164 Rundown

Spy X Family: Yor continues her fight with kusarigama guy and Anya demonstrates that in addition to reading minds she may have the power to influence them because she’s like ‘oh cool this lady I don’t know is doing a street performance’ and everyone instantly believes her. (That’s a joke but I would legitimately not be surprised if Anya developed some sort of low level hypnosis with her powers and that’s the reason everyone acts a little more stupid and agreeable around her but it could also just be she’s a kid in a comedy show idk). But yeah Loid comes out in an outfit that would fit right in in a Saint’s Row game and it’s just great. Yor’s group decides to lay low and navelgaze about the old ‘soldiers in times of peace’ chestnut while Yor debates giving up assassining which I guess they’d rename the show to Regular Mom Girl X Family if she did that. The next day Anya tries to ditch Loid all day but ends up having fun doing all the stuff she’s trying to distract him with before finally just coming out and saying she misses Yor and Loid agrees to go see her tomorrow. Meanwhile the bad guys are honing in on the group and the ship that’s coming to pick up the mafia wife is on its way so the final showdown is at hand.

Inuyasha: I’m pretty sure this is still filler but it’s hard to tell since it does tie into the main plot tangentially and sometimes even the canon is just kinda written like filler sometimes. The gang (read: Inuyasha) uses Shippo as bait for the demon of the week and it turns out to be a parasite that is leeching off of other demons. Long story short Shippo gets possessed and lets all the stuff he usually lets slide build up as resentment and the gang has a whole episode fight of ‘well that wasn’t very dangerous but it sure was annoying’ which is funny because it even feels like the parasites give Shippo a minor power boost since he’s shown using more powerful variations of his gag techniques and doing stuff like teleporting which he normally can’t do (though oddly I think it is something he can do to a limited degree in Yashahime if I remember right) But yeah after a bunch of gags where it’s ‘Shippo’s gag attack but moderately more threatening’ like a toned down version of Luffy vs Usopp, Inuyasha manages to yeet the parasite off of him and they find a fuckload of the things and it’s somehow tied to Naraku harassing a large demon or something or maybe not because this is filler. Like they say the parasites are left behind because the demon changed location but I’m pretty sure if they’re parasites they’d just… go with the demon, like if they’re parasites and not symbiotes the demon probably wouldn’t care to warn them like ‘hey I’m going somewhere you guys can’t survive or some shit so get off’ so yeah the tie to canon is tenuous at best.

Yu Yu Hakusho: The final-ish round of Yusuke vs Yomi has finally arrived and for some reason they’re doing three rounds at once now and we’re having Mukuro and the girl that beat Chuu as well as chrome demon and beret guy having their final clashes at the same time which seems like it’s a weird thing to do, dividing the attention of the spectators and everyone complaining that the competitors won’t have enough time to recover for the next round you’d think they’d draw it out more but given how Togashi’s health was declining at this time that may be some sort of commentary on the manga industry. If I recall correctly this is the episode they played during the Toonami April Fools joke that revived the block so that’s pretty cool even though at the time I hadn’t seen much of the Three Kings arc and didn’t know what was going on I didn’t miss as much context as I thought I did. See the funny thing is as weird a rushed as the pacing is here the weirdest part is that the ending’s so focused on characters we know nothing about like fucking baret guy vs chrome guy is one of the final fights we don’t know shit about either of those guys and Yomi’s only marginally better. Still as the fight begins, Yusuke starts his Megaman Zero “WHAT AM I FIGHTING FOOOOR!?” monologue and if this arc had a proper… well, arc, this would’ve been something he’d been brooding over for a while but instead it kinda hits him all at once and he just kinda disassociates for half the fight. It’s a good angle to come at his character from this late in the series, him just wondering what he’s doing since he doesn’t want to be king of the demons and is just fighting because it’s all he’s ever done. He’s not an angry young man anymore nor is some brooding anime villain inspiring him to come kill them because they’ll kill his girlfriend because they want to be proven wrong, he’s wondering if all he’s waiting for now is to get beaten as well and have his own philosophy overcome. It’s good stuff but like I said it comes out of literally nowhere, though Yomi’s reaction to it is great he’s just like “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOU UPENDED THE GOVERNMENT OF A WHOLE DIMENSION AND YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING!?” like it really puts into context how over a dozen demon illuminati Machiavellian schemers were thrown off by a teenager that just likes to punch things. Yusuke gets a vision of Raizen which basically says that he still has to resolve what his demon half means to him, or more loosely interpreted what place his love of fighting has in his future. He gets his demon powerup and starts fighting evenly with Yomi but Yomi has an anti-demon barrier but considering Yusuke has only been using demon power for like five minutes anyway it’s pretty easy for him to just switch to Spirit Energy and blast through it. Like thematically it’s cool Yusuke showing his original spirit powers are what make him unique and the power bestowed by his demonic transformation doesn’t own him even if it informs part of his identity but it also means implementing a loophole to something that only just became a thing in this fight and Yomi having a weirdly specific barrier that only blocks one type of energy. I always thought this’d be a more interesting fight if it was Yusuke versus Shura, like Shura is basically a blank slate and having him develop the foundation of morals he’d eventually rule by in a fight with Yusuke, having him shape the demon world without actually winning, would’ve been kinda neat like I guess they’re going for sort of the same thing with Yomi becoming less of a dick but it’s a harder sell for someone that’s been running a demon dictatorship for 500 years. Still, Yusuke’s voiceover in the preview warning how the end is near does kinda get to me, I’m gonna miss this show when it leaves the block.

Jujutsu Kaisen: So Yuji has to fight a Grasshopper (or a Locust idk, his name is Grasshopper Guy and everyone calls him a grasshopper but the overview is talking about Locusts so I don’t even know) and it’s a pretty funny fight like the dude is pretty funny for a mid-tier mook to stall Yuji for two minutes and give him a win when he chops off this guy’s dick and it just feels like the JJK author gets random hyperfixations and wants to throw them in and I’m fine with that. Meanwhile the plan is just to jump Gojo with three dudes and flood the place with hostages and hope for the best. I feel like we’re watching One Punch Man but instead of following Saitama we’re following a Will-E Coyote style gang of people trying to kill Saitama and it’s just like you know it’s not gonna work, fucking Krakatoa is not gonna get one over on Gojo and I feel kinda bad for them. They do this thing where it’s like Domain Aura which is just like ‘power up all my moves and give piercing damage’ because you literally need piercing damage to even fight Gojo at all and he’s just like ‘oh that’s kinda cute so you’re looking for a beatdown instead of me just shrugging you off and killing you, congratulations on moving up on rung on the ‘still not even a fight’ ladder.”.

Scott Pilgrim Takes Off: So the finale has gone full Ember Island Players for a play about the original Scott Pilgrim plot and Scott’s kind of in the awkward position of everyone resolving their character arcs without him, like I think everyone’s actually better off than if he ran around punching them in the face, did we accidentally make the original plot obsolete? Anyway during the play, Even Older Scott takes the main cast to… the moon or something? Idk if they are in the future or just on the present moon but they seem to have changed location and time and Even Older Scott is basically a demigod. Turns out he’s the one that made the knockoff AT Field that stops them from kissing but he didn’t put anything on his dick I guess so they still ended up married and they just don’t kiss while Scott’s rawdogging her like Goku which is kind of its own nightmare but yeah. They all fight and it’s basically like that scene in One Piece Stampede where everyone throws everything they’ve got at Douglas Bullet and he just tanks it by being ridiculously fuckshow strong. The funny thing is everyone but Scott and Ramona get defeated and sent back to the theater which like… Gideon straight up asked for that at the beginning of the fight so what was the point? Like it’s cool for all the Exes to get powerups from Ramona’s bag to showcase the mended bridges and show how making peace with her has turned them into their best selves but like if they’re just gonna pop back when they’re beaten what’s the point? Like I don’t quite get EOS’s plan here since best case scenario he just punches his younger to death and dies? Like he kinda gets interrupted before explaining what the plan here is and knowing Scott there might not even be one. Either way Even Older Ramona comes in to save the day and I kinda like what they did here, at first it seems like EOS is just overreacting and it’s a dumb ‘haha a Three’s Company misunderstanding almost destroyed the multiverse isn’t that funny’ but it’s a little more complicated. Scott saw the thing I’ve been complaining about the whole time, that Ramona just seems to bail on relationships at the first sign of trouble regardless of the other person’s feelings, EOR says this wasn’t the case and EOS definitely took it way too far but regular Ramona does see the conflict here and does the only thing that can really fix things: she decides to love herself. It’s a twist on the whole ‘can’t love anybody until you love yourself’ deal in that she can love Scott without fully loving herself but it’s still going to cause problems and her Super Saiyan transformation involves making peace with herself so she doesn’t feel the need to let her self-doubt yeet herself away from happiness. It’s nice, I like it, like it definitely throws some shade at EOS for all the shit he caused but recognizes Ramona’s involvement and her character flaws that led to neither of them being happy. Everyone goes home and gets their good ending and Gideon, Matt and Jules do a stinger for their own little evil council thing for being directionlessly evil but at least they’re not stuck on a girl anymore so good for them. It’s not ‘the best animated thing in 2023’ like I’ve heard some people say but I enjoyed it, as someone new to the Scott Pilgrim universe I can’t say it gave me a good grasp on everything about the world given how short it was (still not entirely sure how the power system works) but it’s a cute little thing with a nice ending and it addressed all the obvious things I was wondering about along the way, endings are hard and increasingly not good in most things so anything that has a good ending is worth some credit.

Ranking of Kings: There’s another small story about how baby Miranjo met the baby demon and it’s done in that same storybook artstyle as last episode. It’s cute but not much happens, like if anything I thought there was more to her relationship with the demon but I guess it’s just ‘nah they just met in the forest one day and started playing’ like… okay. The second part is Bojji leaving on his journey from the end of season1 and giving everyone sentimental gifts from the titular Treasure Chest of Courage it’s cute but rather than things from the actual story or flashbacks it’s just a bunch of stuff they have to make up backstories for which is kinda less effective. Bojji does eventually leave and find Kage again and they reenact the first ED while the first OP is playing and that’s nice. It’s just kinda weird, like there’s one episode left and we’re finally back to where we were at the end of last season like are we really just doing a whole season for one episode worth of story progression? It feels like Higurashi Sotsu all over again like I’d almost prefer a full season of meaningless filler so you can just skip the whole thing.

Vinland Saga: Thorfinn has a dream about killing Einar’s family, now it’s not literal, he’s just reconciling his past sins with now being such close friends with someone that could’ve bene one of his past victims but it’s kind of funny that his mind constructed a young Einar and his family for the dream and made it exactly what he looked like because we know what he looked like even if Thorfinn doesn’t and it’d be confusing otherwise. Thing is Einar’s finally become a level 4 friend and unlocked Thorfinn’s tragic backstory so he gives him the whole deal about season 1 and even goes so far as to say he doesn’t hate Askeladd anymore and without that burning hatred in him anymore he feels empty (hey, YYH, second time today we’re dealing with a young man that doesn’t know what to do without being angry and fighting things all the time). He even says he’s forgetting something and can’t quite remember something very important (I have a feeling it rhymes with “I hate Bow Emilies”) and the old man and Einar both reinforce to him that it’s never too late to start over and do something else with your life and if you don’t know how to do anything but what you’ve been doing the first step to stop that is learning new things and it’s a really great message. Also they mention catching fish for Lent and it being ready to snow which is weird considering Lent happens in the beginning of Spring but maybe the weather’s just kinda always shitty.This chill vibe is kinda completely torn down when they come back and all their plants have been fucked over by jealous farmhands who’re just like ‘if slaves do farm work then that means they’re just like me!’ Bro it’s a FARM if they don’t do farm work what the fuck else they gonna do!? Farming is like 90% of what goes on on farms! But yeah, Einar’s pissed and Thorfinn trying to talk some sense because obviously nothing will get done if they just fly off the handle but also also if they just do nothing then they’ll just keep wrecking their crops so there’s really no winning unless they post an armed guard on their farm 24/7. So yeah, they find the farmhands and THORFINN actually throws the first punch and it’s pretty badass to see him getting worked up but it doesn’t last long given Thorfinn’s not in ‘anime character taking on 50 guys’ mode and they outnumber them three to one and have weapons and shit so back into the hallucination hole for Thorfinn.

[talenlee]

Game Pile: HitchHiker's Guide To The Galaxy

Did you know that one of the funniest English language authors in history wrote a bunch of videogames, and they’re really funny? Well, you probably did, because Terry Pratchett made that huge Oblivion mod, but also, his peer Douglas Adams also made stuff, though on earlier, clunkier, uglier hardware.

Yes, once more I delve into the infocom vaults to talk to you about a game that is, primarily, just text, almost as if I have some kind of bias towards that kind of media for some reason.

Anyway, I’m going to complain about Twine briefly.

Sometimes I feel like the web browser is the wrongest way to do a text adventure. I’m not against Twine, don’t get me wrong. Parser games are understandably, less accessible and they’re famously hard to make comprehensively responsible to how you

It sometimes reminds me of how I frame poker. Poker is a game where you and the other players spend enough time with one another to create a common language – how you bid, how quickly you bid, all that stuff – and then see how you can use that language to lie to one another. Parser videogames can kinda do something like that too, but all of that language is set up ahead of time and a little remotely. It had opportunities to create interesting tension, such as if a developer didn’t consider a particular word that could be a noun or a verb, as in the famous Put Bag Bottle problem from Leisure Suit Larry 2 –

What?

oh okay, so in Leisure Suit Larry 2, you have to hastily construct a molotov cocktail (kinda) with a bottle of fuel (kinda) and a paper airsickness bag from an airplane. There’s a bug? of sorts? in the late stage of the game where most people are typing phrases like PUT BAG BOTTLE or USE BAG BOTTLE. Normally, if that doesn’t work, the game will just say something like ‘I don’t understand,’ which is a good way the games handle a lot of their error states, but in the case of this little bag and this little bottle, instead, Larry does something else entirely with its own animation and puts the game into a failed state: he chucks the bottle down into the volcano you’re standing over.

It makes sense at the time.

Thing is, what was going on there was that the parser could interpret the word ‘bag’ as a verb. The way the parser worked to tidy up commands was to consider the first verb and the last noun – because that’s usually all it needed, which helped clean up when players were using unnecessary adjectives that might accidentally confuse them. If you were in a room with four phones and one was ringing, ‘answer phone’ was functionally the same as ‘answer the yellow phone in the middle’ because the game would happily recognise that ‘in the middle’ wasn’t a noun and since only one phone was ringing, knowing you meant the yellow one didn’t mean anything. You could use this to weird results in speedruns of some games, where you could type an extensive list of commands nested inside one another like USE HAT SCREW FLUFF BUG POTION and then just delete the words at the end each time you repeated the input.

In the case of the Leisure Suit Larry bug, the way around it was the use of the word ‘the’ – you had to PUT THE BAG IN THE BOTTLE, but also not PUT BAG IN BOTTLE because it’s missing the word ‘the’ that indicates it’s a noun and a noun.

Parsers are hard, and all of this predicates on the idea that you’re a person who looks at the word ‘bag’ and thinks of it as a verb before you consider its applications as a noun.

Text Parser games introduce ways that you can be wrong, and it introduces ways that you can be frustrated, and those two elements were definitely part of Douglas Adams’ vision of games in Beaurocracy. That game has a limited number of inputs you can make – a typo for example, uses up one of them. If you check your inventory because you’re stuck, that uses up one of your inputs. You ultimately need to only ever make correct, non-frustrating inputs to get through that literally and deliberately kafkaesque form input system of a game, and that means you need to know how all the puzzles are solved ahead of time. The only way to do that is to do the puzzles, note how you did it perfectly, then restart the game to do it again. This is before widely distributed cheat code or walkthrough websites. This game was explicitly, deliberately, inconveniently difficult, and it was trying to manipulate you and how you interacted with it.

Basically, you should hate Beaurocracy because it was trying to make you hate it. I know I’ve never finished it, even if I’m very impressed with the dedication to, as it were, the bit. Douglas Adams would have killed on Tumblr is what I’m saying.

Okay, but what about Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy.

I assumed I’d written about this in the past, a long time ago, and over ten years the words flow to me like I’ve probably told it in little bits and pieces, but Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy is a text parser game that really leant against all the surfaces of the kind of game it was. First of all there are just some deliberate uses of a turn based timer to fuck with you.

There’s this puzzle early on, where, in order to unlock access to most of the rest of the game, you need a babelfish to stick in your ear. These are super common in the lore of the world, so much so that there’s a vending machine you can get one out of. In the book series, and radio play, the babelfish is added to Arthur’s life by Ford helpfully jamming it in his ear after getting it from a vending machine, but in the text parser game, you have to retrieve it from the vending machine yourself.

It’s a pretty neat little puzzle; you press a button to get a fish, and then immediately find a problem with how it’s dispensed. So you solve the puzzle of how it’s dispensed and press the button again. It dispenses another one, but your solution breeds a new problem and now it falls down a grate. So you look at the grate and you devise a solution and you press the button on the vending machine and get another fish which now goes from solution one to solution two to problem three. You solve problem three, press the button, and if you’ve done it like this the vending machine is now out of fish. But it doesn’t matter, because you’re also out of time and get dragged off to solve another puzzle, which you can’t, because you can’t understand any of the text being spoken to you.

The only way to solve the puzzle is to know at least one of the steps ahead of time, and then you need to pick up all your guff you put down in the process because you need it later.

The game even asks you, as you’re putting the pieces down, hey, do you know what you’re doing or are you winging it?

It’s mendacious but also it’s deliberately trying to engage you, the player in a particular way because I feel like this whole genre of game expected you to play with the whole of its text. That there was a reason every word was put in a description and it was to make reading it and engaging with it interesting. That’s pretty cool, and the HTML-ification of interactive text (which isn’t a problem per se, but it does present a sort of ‘first point, easiest point’ for the genre of interactive fiction it creates) does kind of lose some of this just because it needs to make its point of interface pretty evident.

(Not that you can’t get sneaky with it!)

(You can make twine games that notice when they’ve been rolled back, like ‘remembering’ something is a chance to change the past.)

(This is an idea we talk about in game studies as ‘hypertext,’ where text you can experience multiple times in different ways does not present a dozen readers a dozen paths but rather, all twelve readers experience the same path, which is to say, they go back and play all of them.)

Anyway, this isn’t the real thing in Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy that I love beyond meaningful words. What I love is that at one point, you have to demonstrate a capacity for abstract thought by showing an NPC that you are holding both tea and not tea.

And like obviously, when you think about it for a moment, of course you are, right? Like if ‘tea’ is an inventory item, any other inventory item is ‘not tea.’ But that’s not it – you have to specify that you show someone both tea and the absence of tea, as a way of representing that you aren’t just treating the objects in the game like entities in a parser.

Which you are.

Because when you do this, in your inventory, you get ‘no tea.’

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

[percontaion-points]

Our Violent Delights chapters 3 & 4

Click to see the rest of the snark & image descriptions

Chapter 3

And it will have this city dance on its strings.

Chapter 3 summary: So a man walks into a cabaret in the White Flower territory. And despite this sounding like the set-up to a bad joke… what actually happened is so fucking funny, despite how serious that it is. So anyway, this man walks in, transforms into a monster and unleashes those plague bugs. 

And I’m sorry, but the author seriously sat there and said to herself “You know what I’m going to write about? A monster (whose origins are never explained and nobody ever stops to ask why these people are monsters) who unleashes plague bugs. Amazing. Well done. I’ll be on the NYTBSL within a week of book launch!”

Obviously news like this spreads fast, and Juliette storms into the White Flower HQ to demand to know why they didn’t play the blackmailer. A bunch of nameless (faceless) people pull out letters in unison that all say “Paul Dexter only had one monster. I have five. Do as I say, or everyone dies.”

Chapter 4

For the last few years, he had quietly done his job, to the point where Juliette would downright forget Rosalind and Kathleen still had a father until he showed up to a family dinner as a reminder. It wasn’t as though Rosalind and Kathleen interacted with him often either, given their residence at the Cai house, and as far as Juliette knew, her two cousins didn’t want to reside with their grouchy father.

Does anybody remember that random plotline where Kathleen was not actually Kathlee, but a random Chinese girl who was put into place after the actual Kathleen died? 

Mainly in how it was brought up, made to seem like such a huge deal, and quickly 100% forgotten about. 

Editors. HA. WHO THE FUCK ARE THEY?!

Walter shrugged. “Buy it or not,” he said simply. “It is not my city that is soon to suffer.”

Chapter 4 summary: Anyway, so the city is plunged into panic and fear yet again. Juliette basically sulks around her house, providing nothing to the actual plot. There’s this dumb bit where Tyler comes in, having done something to the White Flowers, but again, it provides nothing to the actual plot. 

Walter Dexter (Paul’s father) shows up at the house, and says that he found some of his son’s old research. Although Paul destroyed his most relevant notes, he failed to think of his old stuff. Juliette chews him out for having raised a disgusting piece of shit instead of an actual human being, but all Walter says, and I quote “I didn’t ask him to do any of that.” Anyway, he wants Juliette to pay an obscene amount of money for the research notebooks. When she complains about the price, he says that he doesn’t care if she buys it or not, because he’s leaving, regardless. (Although, this would be the point where Juliette simply murders Walter and takes the notebooks anyway. I don’t think many people would cry over Walter’s death.)

[queerpanikkar]

...i was following you

Buck thinks he could kiss this man. But the only thing that comes out is, “Are you a libertarian?”

Eddie’s face changes to one of horror. “Why would you even ask me that?” he demands. “Oh my God, Buck. What about me—please tell me what made you think I was a libertarian so that I can never do it again.”

2k | read on ao3 | (yes i am sorry)

Honestly, Buck doesn’t know as much about cryptocurrency as Ravi thinks he does.

He’s not unfamiliar with the concept. He knows that it makes you rich and lots of billionaires invest in it. Or maybe lots of people invest in it and then become billionaires or something. He knows that there’s something called Dogecoin that exists, somewhere on the internet. He knows that several of the people he follows on Twitter have funny animated icons as their profile picture, but only some of those mean anything.

He’s also rapidly figuring out that cryptocurrency is bad . Like, bad bad. He’s also learning, between Ravi’s irritated little pauses for breath, what market volatility is.

“And they’re terrible for the environment,” Ravi continues ranting. “Can you imagine powering, like, a bunch of computers for every second of every day just to store some information that may or may not ever be used in real life? That’s so stupid! The Amazon rainforest could be depleted because of fucking Logan Paul’s Pokemon card NFT.”

“Ravi,” Bobby suggests carefully. It sounds like he wants to say ‘Let’s all use our inside voices’. “Maybe you want to have this conversation when Buck doesn’t have a sharp object in his hand?” He motions towards the cutting board. “Also, I’d like to eat lunch in the next hour, if that’s okay with you.”

Ravi throws himself onto the couch with a groan, feet coming up to rest on the arm rest. “No one had a problem with sharp objects when Buck was chasing after me with a chainsaw.”

“For the last time,” Buck complains, chopping an onion with a little too much force. Hen looks between them as she climbs up the stairs, but she probably knows what they’re talking about. Ravi’s been on the topic ever since he got back onto A-shift after last week. “It was a misunderstanding!”

“It was a chainsaw.”

And yeah, Ravi’s got him there.

“This is your fault,” he mutters to Hen dramatically when she heads for the coffee pot. “If you hadn’t told him about what I said—I was just joking—”

“You called me middle-aged,” Hen replies, dead-pan. “I’m holding my grudge. I told Karen. She’s holding a grudge too.”

Buck groans. He has a habit of putting his own foot in his mouth these days—is trying too hard for Eddie and Maddie and Christopher that he slips up, a little, when it doesn’t concern those three. Maybe he’s taking it all a little bit for granted, but if there’s one thing he’s always been able to count on, it’s Hen. “But Ravi—”

“Ravi is correct,” Ravi interjects and then falters sheepishly when Bobby gives him a look. It’s almost like normal Ravi and political Ravi are two different people. “Sorry.” He shrugs. “At least you’re not a libertarian.”

For a second, Buck thinks Ravi just called him a lesbian. He frowns and crosses his arms. “I could be,” he says, and oh great now he’s got onion juice on his elbow. “If I wanted to.”

Hen rolls her eyes and Ravi opens his mouth to retort, that familiar gleam in his eyes that Buck’s begun to associate with words like, ‘Campaign Finance Reform’ and ‘Socioeconomic gentrification’. And Buck loves learning about a lot of stuff, really, but he feels like Ravi’s starting out with the assumption that he is at all able to name the three branches of government without consulting Wikipedia. So he’s very, very grateful when the alarm goes.

Lucy turns to him in the firetruck, and Buck thinks maybe he’ll get her to explain to him what a libertarian is because he’s pretty sure she already thinks the 118’s got a few screws loose anyway. But then she says, “You smell like onion,” and the moment just kind of escapes him.

read on ao3

tags: @berthulf @henwilsons @hetrez @kissyboytroye @dispatchersdiaz @1stbonesfan @polargypsy @whyisshesoromantic @itsbuckactually @buckbegns @himbodiaz @adamsparirsh @ravipanikar @fruitydiaz @dontknowwherethereis @bedhadakdiaz @theideaofhome @zaedabi @britishmysteries @lawyerlauren @moonn-liiight @sunshinediaz

[honey-milk-depresso]

Obey Me Opposites Attract (1)

Lucifer:

It’ll be that you are full of flaws, low self esteem, forgiving and merciful,

and Lucifer is flawless, high as fck self esteem, unforgiving and unmerciful.

Like a strict dad and a forgiving mother.

Like-

h u h-

Conversations sometimes go like this:

“That scumbag Mammon, I’m gonna-”

“Calm down, Lucifer, I’m sure he didn’t mean it.”

He’s somehow always calm around you.

And you somehow manage to calm him down easily

It’s a mystery and miracle to be honest-

So many people wonder why he would ever bother and fuss about you.

You were... mostly plain, you didn’t stand out, and you don’t really have much in you.

Your grades were average, performances were average-

You are basically average in the majority’s eyes.

But Lucifer thought differently otherwise.

How tf do you even not KILL Mammon? Or Levi? Or anyone?

How do you have that much of mercy??

Sometimes he reprimand you of letting people go so easily,

but once others see that you forgive them, 

I think they’d feel guilty if they do it again to upset you.

You’re kind hearted, unlike Lucifer,

and seeing you upset will break your heart. So they won’t cause the same trouble again at best.

And Lucifer was like “Wait, there was no murder involved??”

So, he’s thankful to have you around.

And he finds comfort in you.

Best to make sure those people once at fault don’t do their wrongs again,

if they made you sad, Lucifer will exterminate them.

Just for you :)

“Lucifer, no-”

Mammon:

If Mammon is greedy, a slack, immature, sensitive, empathetic and egoistic,

Then you are generous (if necessary), hardworking, mature, insensitive, coldhearted and humble. (somehow-)

He would be always trying to go to every gambling corner, and you’d be the one to drag him away from it.

Basically just dragging him away from danger, which he’s somehow always attracted to it.

At first, he’s always whiny and complaining about it, to which you gave him a glare and coldly ask him to be quiet, to which he promptly shut up afterwards,

it’s apparent that you two had a soft spot for each other.

Well, in different ways.

Mammon acts all haughty and stuff in front of you, saying he doesn’t need your help, or he’s doing it because he “felt like it”,

but really, Mammon’s just really protective over you,

and he knows he’s not good at helping or solving a problem at all, 

but he knows your human, and that the problems he’s dealing with most of the time, could get you killed if you weren’t careful, so he doesn’t want you helping him.

You on the other hand, always tell him cruel truths, coldly ask him to go back, because you’re worried about him too,

and you don’t want him to get hurt.

So you ask him to get out of the place or to shut up so he wouldn’t get into further trouble.

You actually help him in his tasks, since you’re hardworking and he’s a slack,

and though you have always told him to do it,

which he would cuz you’re pretty intimidating-

you end up helping him because you do love him.

And he feels sorta guilty for you doing all his work, so he helps you out-

I say you two are a tsundere couple- in different ways :3

Leviathan:

You’d be outgoing, confident, contented, optimistic and a social butterfly,

Levi would be reclusive, insecure, envious, pessimistic and a closet shut in.

Unlike with Lucifer, where you’re the loser (I’m sorry-) and the other is seemingly perfect in every way,

it’s the opposite.

You’re the one seemingly perfect in every way, while Levi is the loser-

huh-

Levi calls you the biggest normie he’s ever met,

and he was at first, super jealous of you.

you make friends so easily, and everyone seemed to like you since day 1,

and how could you be so grateful for everything?!

Won’t you feel upset if everybody else got the world, and you only get a grain of sand??

but little did he know, you were also kind of jealous of him, too.

That was because you couldn’t really survive on yourself without people wih you,

or the fact that you were a lot more dependent on other people,

not so much like Levi,

he does quite a lot by himself,

and he’s pretty independent too.

And Levi was shocked as frick-

You??

Jealous of him???

He became a blushing mess of embarrassment,

he doesn’t know how to react.

Your relationship is something like this:

“LEVI *pulling him by the leg* GET OUT OF YOUR ROOM, YOU NEED FRESH AIR-”

“FRESH AIR WON’T HELP ME, STOP PULLING ME AND LET ME BACK IN MY CASTLE-”

Yep-

But, he’s happy you actually look up to him,

and because you’ve always pushed him out of his comfort zone,

he’s a lot more confident than he used to be, so he’s thankful for you.

“What? No- I- I- okay fine yes, I like you, too... in a way..”

Satan:

Satan is a bookworm, practical, short fused, calm at times and overthinks too much,

You are, well, not a bookworm, more fond of video games, focusing more on emotional intelligence, more calmer and patient than Satan, and underthinking.

Satan actually thought you’ll get along more with Levi,

since you both are pretty hardcore when it comes to gaming.

Apparently not.

Now he’s rambling to you about a book he’s read, while you played on your game consoles while showing him an epic kill.

Pretty funny huh?

Like Lucifer, you tend to be the one calming Satan down, and he appreciates it.

And you help him understand the emotional side of things, allowing him to understand other people’s feelings and how to deal with them,

and you helped him get along with Lucifer after so many centuries.

He’s gotten a lot better in managing his anger because of you.

And he helps you not make a bad choice, get killed, and help you get out of the situation with his quick thinking.

He thinks too much, so you help him calm down and stuff, not to

ya know,

overthink SO MUCH-

And he helps you to actually process your thoughts.

He engulfs you with a bunch of knowledge he knows to impress you,

and while you love gaming,

you know when to stop

and just listen to him ramble-

before you start geeking about a game to him,

and while he doesn’t know anything,

he’ll just listen.

It’s you after all he wants to listen to, and that’s all that matters <3

[mondfahrt]

“historical accuracy”

yesterday i read an article about ofmd and the author guy (after praising the show’s historical accuracy up to that point) mentioned several times “this is where they veer from historic events” or “in reality” or something along these lines. my favourite is: “in season 2, they’ll have to really abandon all the real-world events... or don’t include blackbeard at all!”

and god... i mean, there’s so much to say about how these kinds of critiques pop up so much more around queer characters and relationships... but i’m starting to get more and more annoyed that we’re talking about “historical accuracy” at all.

don’t get me wrong, of course, there’s a time and place for historical accuracy, getting the facts right and everything, even in fiction. i like long-winded youtube essays about historical clothing as much as the next person, sometimes it feels good to point out every mistake, and sometimes these mistakes are actually harmful to real-life people, especially minorities who are only now being listened to when it comes to their own stories and histories.

and look, i also sometimes like to hate on artists’ biopics, just because i’ve read too much about these artists and some movies just suck the life out of art. i realize i do that, too, okay?

however. i’m really fed up with “historical accuracy”. especially when it comes to shit that happened a couple centuries ago. and double if we’re talking about queer comedies, ya know, where stuff is changed for the narrative. or because it’s supposed to be fucking funny.

i want to stress this: i have seen not one article complaining about mary bonnet basically inventing expressionism and cubism, about 200 years ahead of her time. to me personally, this is the biggest in-your-face anachronism in the show. and it’s because of the narrative, because audiences today wouldn’t look at a conversation piece from 1750 or whatever and think “oh yeah she’s really ahead of her time!”, so we need the anachronism, and also it’s fucking funny. mary bonnet is basically picasso. what the fuck. i love it.

but i did see articles where the author guy talks at length about all the pirate-y details the show changed, specifically where biographies don’t line up. (as a personal note, i do think that’s a lot to do with the pirate setting because some settings just hit the wannabe historians/history nerds more than others. imo if they’d set the story in ancient rome, it would’ve been worse. i’ve never met a bunch of people more annoyed by “mistakes” than ancient rome (wannabe) historians.) and the biographies never line up when there’s a queer romance involved. BIG SURPRISE.

and i think this is where my actual complaint comes in: history itself is just a story. we don’t know what happened with blackbeard and bonnet. sure, we have some records. but none of us were there, so we can’t know. just as an example, you could find edward teach’s personal diary tomorrow (or does that exist already, i have no idea, whatever, roll with me here) and you still wouldn’t know what really happened. because it could be completely made up to invent a persona for him. it could literally be a self-insert fanfiction. it could be forged. and even if none of that were true, we still wouldn’t know because first person accounts will always be unreliable to an extent.

and then we still have the problem of interpreting this text, this historical source. you could give this diary to 100 historians and get back 100 different opinions, told in 100 different voices with - and this is important - 100 different intentions. because when we’re telling history, our narratives always serve a purpose. this is why, sometimes, historic interpretations change over time. we change our views on the world as a whole, we let new voices be heard, we discover new facts, we disregard some blatant lies, we change the narrative over and over and over again. we never get any closer to the truth, we just start looking at our own time differently.

a historian could write a paper on why stede bonnet was gay, another historian could write another paper on why he wasn’t, they could both get an equal number of equally respectable sources, get peer-reviewed and published, and i still could read these papers and go “eh, but have you considered...”, and we could all be right in the end but we would all say these things, our opinions, with intention. so, the important part isn’t what the paper says but why the author says it, and when. “stede bonnet was gay and here’s why” sounds awesome in a paper from 2022 and is probably meant to discredit him in 1952. “stede bonnet wasn’t gay and here’s why” sounds exhaustingly ordinary coming from an author in 1952, but makes my eyes roll back into my head in 2022.

i’m not saying we should disregard facts when telling stories based on historical events. or that we should stop researching history. or that we shouldn’t get annoyed at inaccuracies. like i said in the beginning, that can be fun!

what i do want to say, though, is that we should ask ourselves (and i’m not only talking about wannabe history nerds here) why we find these things annoying. what purpose does the inaccuracy serve? am i only annoyed because it alters the way i see this historical figure and i don’t like it? am i annoyed because this inaccuracy actually hurts people now? why am i annoyed at this inaccuracy and not another one? can i even say it’s an inaccurate telling of the story or is this just inaccurate based on the facts that i have? maybe someone else has different facts? or different opinions?

and then, lastly: am i just annoyed because i, personally, don’t relate to this version of the story?

and to top it all of: does this change they made in the telling of this story serve a narrative purpose, and is this narrative purpose sometimes simply a way of saying “wouldn’t it be fucking great if...”, and is this something i should let other people enjoy while i go away to have my own opinions?

THE END. (except it isn’t because the telling of history doesn’t end and will forever change depending on the Political Mood of the Day and maybe these thoughts will be obsolete by next week. thanks for coming to my ted talk.)

[asteroshearts]

[Actor!AU] Relationship HCs

[Levi + Eren] 

Levi Ackerman: 

Even though he still has his RBF off-screen he’s a hell of a lot nicer than people think he is. 

Probably asked Eren if he was okay several times before and after the trial scene. 

They used one of your tweets that read, “I want Levi to break my back like a glowstick” during those “____ reads thirst tweets” videos and his face immediately became full-on red when he saw your @. 

I mean, he was blushing before, but when he saw that it was you he jokingly says, “I had no idea they posted this... Why are you like this. If you wanted me to break your back you could’ve just asked me to my face.” 

Great with puppies, kittens, children, and other infantile creatures. If he’s carrying a bouquet during an event or something and a kid comes up to him, he’ll give them a flower. 

“Levi Plays With Puppies While Answering Fan Questions” probably got over a million views in less than half an hour. 

NO ONE DOES BUSINESS CASUAL BETTER THAN HE DOES!! 

People probably take more pictures of you two at the front row seats of fashion shows more than the models themselves. 

Probably has the Rihanna Effect™ where he’ll wear something that looks bad on the OG model on the runway, but once he wears it, it’s suddenly fashionable. 

Speaking of Rihanna he’s probably in a random music video of hers like Mads Mikkelsen in “Bitch Better Have My Money.” 

HE’S STILL AN ACTS OF SERVICE MAN THROUGH AND THROUGH. 

On one hand he does expected “gentleman” things like opening doors for you, closing your car door after you, holding your bags, etc. 

On the other hand he goes to the extreme. 

If he’s not filming something or busy, he’s by your side doing all of the jobs your assistant is supposed to do. 

The directors and cameramen are looking around being like, “Where’s our Important Character Levi” when they need to shoot scenes, but if they find you they’ll just see him following you around, holding an umbrella over your head in one hand and holding your coffee in the other. 

When they first saw it everyone was like...couldn’t you find someone else...that’s not an extremely important cast member to do that... but it’s just Levi, he insists on doing it himself. Your assistant has the easiest job in the world because he elevates all of their jobs for them. 

CAREFULLY HOLDS THE TRAIN OF YOUR DRESS ON RED CARPETS 

When your hair gets tousled or locks fall over your face during filming or photoshoots, the cameramen will point it out, but before any of the hair or makeup people manage to get to you, Levi will just ;; walk over and fix it himself. The two of you probably have the softest smiles at that moment when he’s carefully brushing your hair out of your face. 

Isn’t in a lot of roles. He definitely gets offered a whole bunch of roles!! but especially when you two started dating, he told himself that he didn’t want you guys to crash and burn like many other celebrity couples since they normally spend a lot of time apart and are usually thousands of miles away from each other. When he’s not filming AOT, he tends to take a break from acting and go with you to your jobs. 

However, if he does find himself in a role that he wants to do, he’ll definitely appreciate it if you reciprocate, but doesn’t expect nor force you to. 

Instead he’ll leave your assistant with a long-ass list of how you like your coffee, what you like to eat after a long day of filming, how to approach you when you’re stressed, etc because this man has been doing your assistant’s job the entire time asdfghj 

The only time he’s gently smiling in paparazzi photos is when he’s with you, other than that he looks angry or bored. Like he’ll be at a beautiful beach party with Erwin and Hange but he’s just sitting in the shade with a drink in one hand looking inconvenienced. 

Eren Jaeger: 

OKAY 

There’s this one video of Dylan Sprouse putting his hand on his heart like it’s the national anthem or something when Barbra Palvin walks by on the runway AND THAT’S EXACTLY EREN 

When he sees you walk by either on a modeling gig or on the red carpet this man just stops ,,, and immediately stares and puts his hand on his heart like he’s seen Jesus. 

ALSO does anyone know that one video of the dude tripping over his words when he tries to talk to Jhene Aiko during an interview. 

When you and Eren first met he had to bring Armin as a translator because he was never able to get a straight sentence out in your presence. 

He was legitimately stunned stupid when he saw all of your red carpet looks or interview looks when you two were still new friends during S1 or something. 

follows Ere[Name] ship accounts on twitter and your stan accounts. 

Why do you even have a publicist. He’s your personal hypeman. Sometimes people get confused when they go to his official instagram bc it’s just pictures of you, him promoting your stuff, or really grainy, desaturated pictures of you two doing dumb things together like doing the JOJO Torture Dance together on an empty street at 3AM. These are interspersed with pictures of him when he has to promote something that’s like in his contract. 

When he posts pictures or stories that doesn’t have you in it, the comments are all, “Where’s [Name].” 

When little kids come up to him during panels or out on the street he’ll get jokingly concerned that they’re watching AOT. Like, “Y-You watch the series?? Do your parents know? Is it too scary for you?” 

Tries to make you laugh by pulling funny faces where the camera can’t see him. 

If you mess up on your line, he’ll immediately build on that and goof off with you, resulting in the two of you getting yelled at. 

Quality time is one of his love languages, so like Levi, your managers will work together to make sure your schedules work with each other. 

Sometimes when you have other roles outside of AOT, you might catch him as some regular extra in the background. 

It can’t be helped if sessions go on for too long sometimes, but if it becomes a reoccurring thing due to unorganized sets, he’ll fight with the director and crew to get a break since it’s important for everyone to get some rest. 

If your character is shipped with some character That’s Not Him, the directors know not to show his face during kiss scenes or romantic scenes because he’ll legitimately break character and pout or become so stone faced that he can’t emote at all. 

This Academy Award winning actor will just go 🧍 on the sidelines while you’re trying to kiss Jean for a scene but his stare is burning on the side of your head. 

Eren to Jimmy Fallon or something, “I guess Jean and [Name] are cute but it would be better if it was Ere[Name]. No, no I’m not complaining or anything...” 

GAVE HIS EVERYTHING TO ATTACK ON TITAN JUNIOR HIGH. 

Begged the writers to have more Ere[Name] content in Junior High.

If they let him direct an episode of AOT he will film it like Parks and Rec or The Office.  

[Eren: commits war crimes 

Camera: swerves and zooms in on your face grimacing and Levi’s dead expression while he stares right at the camera.] 

People probably know that they can’t interview him/force him to do lives after shooting because his voice is gone after all that shouting as Eren Jaeger. 

Has a Dan-Emma-Rupert relationship with Mikasa and Armin. He legitimately sees them as siblings even off-set. 

[hmslusitania]

What's your headcanon for each of the main characters' favorite show/thing to watch on TV?

Okay. Okay so

Athena — we know canonically that at least as of 2.01 her favourite show is Claws and she live tweets it and believes Niecey Nash should be on Mount Rushmore.

Bobby — gets extremely invested in every season of the GBBO, complains about the technicals every time, and then Athena and/or Harry will find him in the kitchen at like. Half two in the morning. Baking whatever it was.

Maddie — is a stated “reader” rather than watcher according to 2.02 but considering she lives with Chimney now I’m sure he’s done is best to curate something he thinks she’d like and I want to say it’s like. Downton Abbey or something else equally Austenian (I don’t know if that’s the right adjective it was autocorrect’s suggestion and we all know how that goes)

Chimney — has watched basically every scripted television show that’s gotten anything like buzz in the past ever. The West Wing? Yes. The Sopranos? Yes. Breaking Bad? Yes. Westworld? Yes. Game of Thrones? Yes. Supernatural? All fifteen seasons, baby. He’s also done the funny ones, your Mike Schur shows, your Office and Parks and Rec and Brooklyn Nine-Nine and the Good Place. His favourite right now currently airing is a tie between the Mandalorian and Ted Lasso.

Hen — doesn’t really strike me as a big TV person? But I feel like she and Karen have Movie Nights with a bottle of wine and a huge bowl of popcorn and it’s every sort of movie from old classics to modern comedies (Karen does a very good “here’s looking at you kid” Bogie impression that Hen does not find charming shut up)

Related but Karen has seen Every Episode of Every Star Trek Ever and this will be relevant later

Buck — much like Maddie (obviously) didn’t grow up with TV as a thing, like they had one in the house but it was in the living room in a cabinet and the only thing it got was the game and the only time they watched was Thanksgiving and the Super Bowl. In his adulthood, Buck is a huge fan of documentaries and docuseries. He’s seen every iteration of Planet Earth and Cosmos and the one docuseries the Radiolab guy did and watches all the space documentaries on all the streaming services and technically this all started before he started spending a bunch of time with an intelligent and curious kiddo but it got way more extensive when he wanted to impress Chris with random knowledge all the time. Also Jeopardy. He watched back episodes of Jeopardy on Netflix all the time and he cried when Alex Trebeck died yes I’m projecting onto a fictional character again

Eddie — my darling Eddie who has a Snake Plissken cosplay on lock? For no reason? Eddie is a closet spec-fic geek. And like yes he’s seen the big culturally significant stuff (Star Trek (he and Karen definitely bonded over that — they drive Hen and Buck a little nuts with discussions of Star Trek lore), GoT, Battlestar Galactica, the Mandalorian (he and Chim talk about it at work and it gets them both right in the dad places), Stranger Things) but I also mean like. Speculative fiction schlock and trash (I do not mean this in a derogatory way as Ive watched all these too). I’m talking like. Heroes. Legend of the Seeker. Timeless. The Witcher. iZombie. Eureka. Warehouse 13. Killjoys. Like Buck shows up at his house and finds him two seasons deep into a Magicians binge because Chris was on a sleepover. Eddie will never ever admit to any of this in public ever.