#IM SO SORRY MY RESPONSES HAVE BEEN SO BAD LATELY. OR LIKE THE ENTIRE TIME SINCE I STARTED THIS BLOG.

[goldfades]

Hihii I absolutely love the manager series and I was wondering if you could do something where manager has a bad day and the team cheers them up?

You don't have to but it's just a thought

─ UCONN WBB MANAGER

౨ৎ ─ summary | manager has been stressed out so paige and kk cheer her up!

─ word count | 665 (im sorry it's so short)

─ warnings | stressing out, paige and kk being absolute menaces, uhhh mention of bigbacks..............

─ taglist | @xocherishxo @iienstein @yazmunson @euphternal @uraesthete @hello-nah817 @wanderlusturous and here's a link to my taglist if anyone would like to join!!

YOU SAT ON the bed, flat on your stomach as you scroll on TikTok. The entire team was out and you finally had some time for yourself.

You usually enjoyed away-games ─ the bus rides, the free food (most of the time), the hotels. However, this time it felt more stressful than usual. As you mindlessly scrolled through TikTok, the events of the past few days replayed in your mind. The pressure of the upcoming game, coupled with the tensions within the team, weighed heavily on your shoulders.

You sighed, setting your phone aside for a moment as you put your face into the sheets. The weight of responsibility as the team's manager felt heavier than usual today. You wanted nothing more than to see the team succeed, but lately, it felt like every obstacle was stacked against you.

The pressure was on, and you felt it weighing heavily on your shoulders. The team looked to you for guidance and support, and while you did your best to provide it, there were moments when doubt crept in. Had you made the right calls? Could you have done more to prepare them?

You were too keep in thought to hear the hotel room door until you heard KK's voice. "Gyatt,"

"Oh my gosh, shut the fuck up." Paige laughed as she rolled her eyes at KK's immature comment.

You turned around to face them, then sigh heavily and turn back to your phone on the bed. Nika came in a few moments later, exhaustion evident in her expression as she took a seat next to you on the bed.

You glanced up briefly as Nika joined you on the bed, offering her a small smile before returning your attention to your phone. Despite the presence of your teammates, you couldn't shake off the weight of your thoughts and the heaviness in your mood was noticeable.

Paige's and KK's laughter seemed distant as you continued to scroll through TikTok, the videos failing to lift your mood. Nika's arrival only added to the heavy atmosphere, her tired demeanor mirroring your own.

"Y/N, you good?" Nika asked as she glanced down at you, her glasses on the bridge of her nose slightly sliding down.

You nodded thankfully, a small smile on your face. "Yeah, just tired."

Nika nodded with understanding as she turned her attention back to her phone, the two of you tuning out Paige and KK. Your stressed-out mood didn't go unnoticed by the duo as they exchanged glances.

"Are you hungry?" Paige speaks as she glances at you. You look up at her with a confused expression, turning around so that you were sitting on your back. Before you could protest, Paige continued. "You look hungry. Wanna go get food?"

"Like what?" You mumbled as you looked back at Paige.

Paige scoffed as she glared at you. "Doesn't matter, just get up and let's go get food."

"I'm not in the mood, Paige." You gave her a stern look before picking your phone back up.

Paige was not having it though, she grabbed your arm and forcefully got you up causing KK to burst out laughing at her attempt. "Jeez, you're strong." You just kept glaring kept glaring at her.

"I'll even pay bro, just get up." Paige persisted, her tone firm yet laced with concern.

Reluctantly, you let out a sigh, feeling the weight of Paige's grip on your arm. "Fine, fine," you relented, giving her a small nod.

Paige and KK gave her each other a smile as you grabbed your bag, waving Nika goodbye as you left the room.

"So you're paying for me too, right Paige?" KK asked with a smile as Paige glared at her, causing you to laugh. KK then shot you a glare, "Why are you laughing, big-back?"

"Big-back?!" You repeated in disbelief as Paige bursted out laughing, KK joining in a moment later. "I hate you guys."

"Do you really?" KK asked with a grin on her face.

↳ make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated !

↳ thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡

[voidedaurora]

Apologies for the ask about the 🍉 thing.

If you have a story to say you should say it, the group who made the document thought it was important to make it public. Maybe you can reach out to them if you need help. It’s never too late to share your story if you believe the person deserves to be called out.

She’s already known for lying. And she never addressed a lot of the things in the document. Like those multiple false grooming allegations. Just remember that there’s no backing out once you have it out to the public. Once on the internet always on the internet.

Hope you’re ok. Don’t be intimidated because of fans. They don’t know what you’ve gone through. You have a support group who already set the ground for you. Good luck with what you choose.

Not specifically replying to this ask but Im going to use this to say a bit of what I need to say. Follow up to my last post, Mel has made it clear that she is not going to talk to me, one of her friends dmed me (one of the two I mentioned prior) trying to get me to vc with all 3 of them to get "closure" and talk about things, this was only prompted by the fact I am now speaking out about this (clearly just trying to save face), I stayed silent for nearly 3 months giving her time to come and talk to me and it was honestly the last nail in the coffin for her to clearly only give a shit now that I'm speaking about it. So I'm done, I'm not going to keep any of her shit to myself anymore, I know I shouldn't have been keeping them to myself to begin with and I completely accept anyone who is upset at me for not speaking up sooner. Quickly, I will say that some of this I cannot provide solid proof for, you will all have to take some of this with a side of salt / use context to come to your own conclusions, but I still think its important to mention because I know what I saw and experienced, It is up to you whether you believe what I have to say or not Aswell, Some of this obviously could be wrong as she has refused to clear things up privately but I believe them to be true since I experienced what I experienced :/. I do not condone Harassment, witch-hunting, threats, attack anyone involved, or anything else of the sort You obviously may be honest about your feelings on the matter but have your morals about you when doing so. People that did not consent to being mentioned here will be censored when possible I will be reffering to Quartelz as Mel in this, just felt I'd clarify TW: S/A, Coercion, Grooming(?), General Toxicity, etc.

Firstly, To everyone who supports Mel after the google doc she "made" I've got some unfortunate news to share, She did not write that doc. Mel had quite a few of her friends at the time essentially write the entire document for her, I was one of those people. To clarify, we were not forced but since we all wanted the best for her and for her to be able to move on from it all so we all helped her. The apologies ESPECIALLY she did not write nor mean, She has stated many times to me personally that everyone did not deserve an apology, I will provide some screenshots backing up these claims below Others writing the doc/Proof I can edit the original doc (the public document was moved into a fresh file because I suggested it)

Proof of Mel being an unapologetic asshole about the whole thing (sorry for the rudeness) Her saying "how to write an apology I don't mean" which Is pretty self explanatory, Included more context of the convo so she cant scream at me for not, AS you can see I was very insistent on her writing the apology because I did think they all deserved one, aswell me saying "I'd write it for her but that'd "I would literally write the apology for u but that'd be bad" Which is bad on my end 100% especially because I went through with that, I accept full responsibility for that and I am sorry, you all deserved better

More apology stuff bruhh

(so sorry archi I know you are mentioned here alot but I need you for proof, If anyone attacks you I am so so sorry) Admitting the apology wasn't written by her directly + re-stating she didn't mean the apology a million times and not taking any accountability

Bonus SS of talking with one of her friends at the time about our frustrations of helping her with the doc only for her not to work on it I think that's enough proof she didn't mean a lick of that doc and didn't even write it herself, I do NOT have proof that I specifically wrote the apologies but before the doc was sent out to the public I practically rewrote entire areas to make her sound more genuine aswell fixed the entire thing up, then I had her go over it and edit it to "sound like her" Time for the next part which is one of the more serious topics within this whole thing, I initially was NOT going to bring this to the public or mention it at all since its fairly private but after thinking on it really hard ,and the fact this will never have any closure Clover and I have decided to let you all know about it, I am sure she's going to be quite upset this is public now but she shouldn't have done any of it in the first place. TW:// S/A and Coercion I don't really know how to approach talking about this but around the 30th of march 2023 (before and after) Clover, Mel, And I had all gotten pretty close as friends, This eventually evolved into us having sexual interactions with each other as a group twice. At the time we had all had lengthy conversations making sure everyone was ok with it, the whole consent protocol and such. Edit: for the record, our age differences at the time were me: 16 (10/16/2006) Clover: 17 (3/03/2006) Mel: 17 (8/30/2005) This is relevant because a while back (I am not sure when) Mel had admitted to me one day that she had only slept with Clover to do things with me. I know for a fact she will deny this. This obviously horrified me and clover both because we were under the impression it was a mutual thing between all of us, I'm sure Clover feels violated, used, and a sleuth of other things, I feel absolutely terrible about the entire thing because I was the one who had helped her feel comfortable with the whole thing in the first place and convinced her it was something mutual, and to have Mel later on admit it was not and she just wanted an excuse to do shit with me is absolutely disgusting. Clover and I are both extremely damaged from this and neither of us ever got an apology for this and probably never will, not one that she means at least, shes already proven she doesn't feel remorse for anything she does. You'd think the person that allegedly got assaulted herself and had dealt with homewrecking related things herself wouldn't do something like this but here we are. (Just clarification this was a 3 way, sorry to have to blatantly state it but I didn't want any confusion. Aswell I'd like to state for the record that the interactions happened twice total) I will not be sharing proof of any of this as it would include sharing sensitive information/conversations I don't think any of us would be comfortable being public, You may take this as you will but Clover and I both are living proof of this happening and I just hope you'll take our word for this one as it was already obvious Mel had a thing for me to literally everyone around us, I genuinely do not think I need proof to prove that part alone. There was another section I was going to add explaining another situation but I do not have enough proof gathered to speak on it at the moment so I'll keep it at these two for now. I initially wasn't going to make a big post like this but I wanted to get the stuff I know 100% out there (aswell wanted to get some of the worst out of the way :/) There is absolutely MORE I could/want to talk about but I simply do not have the context/proof to make a proper statement on it at the moment, maybe in the future I will.

also, if any of ya'll need more proof of stuff I CAN dig but I think I got it all covered? That's it for now, She's either going to deny everything, have her friends to defend her, flee the internet, or retaliate. Have a good day ya'll, I am done staying quiet for her also I'm so so sorry if this isn't written well in certain parts, I don't really know how to make stuff like this

[snowyquokka]

SECRET SECRET

K. SEUNGMIN

chapter 1

cw: swearing, fem reader, academic rivals, angst if you squint, both like each other but wont admit it

wc: 1.2k

a.n - welcome to my first full fic !! im super excited to share this and im actually really proud of it. happy reading <3

✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧✧

You’re sitting at your usual spot in the library on your college campus when a book is slammed down on your table, ripping a yelp from your chest as you practically jump out of your skin. You look up to see a smug grin splayed on full, pale pink lips.

Brown eyes sparkle back at you mischievously and before he even opens his mouth, you just know he’s going to say something to purposely aggravate you.

“I don’t want to know, nor do I care.” you grumble before turning back to your book.

“Where the Crawdads Sing.” Seungmin hums, “Didn’t know you had taste,” You ignore him and turn the page.

He huffs and plops down in the seat next to you, his knee brushing against yours as he does.

You snap your head up and admit defeat, placing a bookmark where you left off.

“Since you so rudely interrupted me,”

He rolls his eyes in response to your complaint, “Here we go again,”

“Don’t give me that.” you snap, “You came over here unannounced while I was clearly doing something. So tell me, what is it that you want to brag about now? Hm? Perfect score on the English essay? No wait- I know, you’ve finally succeeded in ass kissing every professor in the building.”

The entire time you were ranting, Seungmin sat with his chin in his palm, face angled towards you. His grin never faltered, which in turn only pissed you off more.

You snap your book shut and move to stand before you feel a hand tug on your sleeve, forcing you to sit.

“I didn’t come over here to brag,” Seungmin readjusts in his chair so his knees are poking the side of your bare thigh, the sudden contact sending warmth throughout you.

“I was hoping we could- I don’t know. Maybe we could be at least civil with each other?.”

Your eyebrows shoot up and your eyes widen.

“C-Civil?” you sputter while searching his face for any trace of ulterior motives.

He nods and fidgets a little. That’s when you realize that he’s nervous.

Seungmin is anything but nervous when it comes to talking to you. He’s always confident while spewing whatever insults he can think of on the spot.

“I uhm- I think I owe you an apology.”

“Excuse me?” That’s not what you meant to say.

Though, you’re fairly certain that whatever you were going to say would’ve come out ten times worse.

“Yeah.” he winces, “Fuck- you know I’m bad at this kind of stuff,” Seungmin huffs and runs a hand through his blonde hair.

“I’m sorry for being a dick,” his broad shoulders deflate and he looks like a weight was literally lifted off of him.

“You’re sorry?”

“Will you stop repeating me?” he scowls.

You can’t help but giggle a little, he couldn’t last two minutes into an apology without looking or sounding annoyed.

“‘M sorry. I just,” you bite your lip to stifle another laugh, “I didn’t think I’d live to see the day that Kim Seungmin apologized for- well, anything.”

He grumbles something incoherently and pushes his knee farther into your thigh. You swallow hard and look behind him at the now very interesting bookshelf.

Seungmin sighs and gets up without another word and leaves. You watch as he rounds the corner and slips through the door.

“What the hell just happened,” you blink and whisper to yourself.

After his sudden apology, Seungmin has avoided you for an entire week now. He won’t even spare you a glance. You’re complaining about it to your best friend, Hyunjin, who also happens to be close with Seungmin.

Small world.

“Look, I don’t know exactly what happened but, like, could you maybe talk to him about it? He’s been killing the mood lately.” Hyunjin brings his iced americano to his lips while you form a bewildered expression.

“Me? You want me to talk to him?” you scoff and lean back in your chair, “Why should I have to? He apologized, I listened. End. Of. Story.”

“Why are you always so stubborn,” Hyunjin rolls his eyes, placing his coffee on the table.

“Ridiculous. Absolutely fucking ridiculous.” you huff and pinch the bridge of your nose. Hyunjin gives you an ‘are you serious’ look.

“If I let you put his number in my phone, will you shut up about it?” He grins and holds out his hand for you to give your phone to him. “And you’re buying me another coffee.”

[You] - cheer up

[Intellectual Demon] - who is this?

[You] - jinnie said that you’ve been a real downer since apologizing to me

[Intellectual Demon] - it’s not even that bad

[You] - i can feel the frown radiating off of you rn

[You] - it’s your aura.

Seungmin smiles to himself proudly. After all, it was his idea to get Hyunjin to give you his number.

Now all he has to do is convince you to meet with him. He’s got it all mapped out; you’ll meet with him at his place, he’ll confess, you’ll reciprocate his feelings and you live happily ever after.

The guy gets the girl, like he always does. It’s a simple, foolproof plan.

Right?

“Yeah, no thanks. I’m good.”

Wrong.

Seungmin was so wrong. Immediately after you pick up the phone he’s already hit with a groan and a ‘what do you want now?’ Nonetheless, he pushed through and asked you to go to his place. You declined, which shouldn’t have surprised him, but it does. Seungmin thought that if he apologized all would be forgiven and you would be more willing to speak to him.

Though, he can only blame himself. He fell-and crashed- first, hard. Instead of admitting his feelings to you, and himself, he tried his hardest to distance himself from you, making you find him unbearable to be around. It worked, of course.

Seungmin wishes it didn’t. He wishes he would’ve just grown a pair and told you. He wishes he didn’t feel so unlovable.

You, on the other hand, have attempted to make your attraction obvious. Someone can only take so much rejection, however. You stopped flirting, stopped even looking in his direction at one point. Seungmin made it crystal clear that he wanted nothing to do with you, and now that he’s apologized you can’t help but catch those feelings all over again.

“Please, just- what do I need to do for you to come here?” Seungmin’s voice echoes through your head, bouncing off the sides as you feel yourself slowly start to give in.

You seriously should stop being a pushover.

“Send me your address, I’ll be there soon.” There’s a pause at the end of the line when Seungmin mutes himself and screams into his pillow.

tags: @godslino @skzstarnet @anakin-sweetheart

dividers: @chaeneuu

[bunnyreaper]

shy fingies

im having a really bad dysphoria day

if possible can i have some trans masc reader/141 comfort? no pressure, im just havin a hard day bc i have medical issues that make a medical transition unsafe and my dysphoria is kicking my asssss

hi!! no need for shy fingies! the dysphoria has been coming too for me lately, so im sending my love your way!! if this sucks im sorry in advance!! ;__;

tf141 x trans male! reader, platonic. brief mentions of transphobia, protective!141, reader users a binder.

It had been a shitty day all round, and things only continued to get worse. 

The day had started with forcing yourself into the shower, in the pitch black darkness, because you just couldn't face it with the light on. Your chest felt tighter than usual, and your skin just felt distinctly not like home. 

When you'd made your way into the canteen for breakfast, the new recruits were staring again, clearly talking about you amongst themselves as they snickered and judged and whispered words and phrases you really never wanted to hear.

Your only salvation was that you were ending this shitty day with a movie night with your task force. 

"Lad!" Soap calls out to you as you enter the rec room with a bag of snacks in hand. "It's yer lucky day, you get ta pick the movie." 

Soap pats the couch beside him as Ghost, Gaz, and the Captain offer their usual smiles. 

"Uh, I'm not too fussed, you can pick." You offer Soap a forced, tight smile as you try your hardest to get comfortable, despite the constriction at your chest. Today it felt a little worse than usual. 

Gaz lets out a groan, as Ghost's eyes narrow. "He picked last week." 

Offering a shrug, you remember you need to grab a drink before you get too settled into the plush of the couch. When you approach the kitchenette, you notice Price beside you.  

"Everything alright, son?" He asks, his hand clasping down on your shoulder as he offers a soothing smile. "Not yourself tonight." 

Son. As the youngest in the taskforce, Price's sweet and affirming nickname for you makes your heart soar.

You struggle to meet his eye as you mumble your response--a clear lie. "I'm fine, just tired." 

Your captain doesn't seem convinced in the slightest, as he remains by your side as you move round the kitchenette. 

"Can always talk to me, you know that? Or any of the boys?" 

"I know." You sigh, knowing they'd be supportive even if they never can quite understand. 

Another body comes closer, joining in the concern party that Price is throwing. It's Gaz, the same look of worry plastered over his face.

"Something happened?" He asks. 

"No." You snap, just a little too quickly, and the entire room falls silent with Soap and Ghost's conversation ending as they turn their attention to you. "Oh god, can you all stop staring at me?!" 

Gaz's hand replaces Price's on your shoulder as he tries to soothe you. "Talk to us, c'mon." 

Ghost and Soap join you all in the kitchen, and the pressure of them all worrying about you is almost too much to handle. They all look so worried, so protective--though you'd long come to accept that it was mostly because you're the baby of the team. 

"The new recruits were talking shit about me behind my back, you know, that kind of shit." You sigh, staring at the floor and wishing it would swallow you whole. 

The atmosphere of the room changes in an instant. 

"I want names, now." Price's words are a demand laced with anger, though not a shred of it directed at you. 

"Captain..." You call out, as Price is already halfway to the door ready to pull the recruits out of bed and give them the dressing down of a lifetime. 

Soap shakes his head. "Easier if you just tell him, lad." Soap's eyes are kind and soft as he considers you, though you know that he will have some choice words for them too next time he's training them. You almost pity them. 

You mutter out the names of the ones you had recognised, and try not to flinch as Price nods and slams the door behind him as he leaves.

"How long have you had your binder on for?" Ghost asks, his gaze severe with concern. 

"Uh... since 6am." 

He sighs, in his 'not mad, just disappointed' older brother way. "Did you take a break at lunch like you're supposed to?" 

You give him a sarcastic look, and cross your arms over yourself defensively. "It'll be fine, promise." 

The door swings open, Soap coming back into the room with Gaz in tow, and you hadn't even realised they have left in the first place. 

Soap holds out a massive bundle of black fabric, while Gaz has a silky garment in his hands. 

"Biggest hoodie of mine I could find, lad, and a fresh compression shirt." Soap explains, as passes the clothes to you. "Binder off, yeah? Then we'll get under the blanket and turn off the lights." 

"And you still have to pick the movie." Gaz smiles.

You nod in compliance before you head to the bathroom to get changed--freeing yourself from the binder and quickly covering yourself with Gaz's shirt and Soap's hoodie. While your chest still aches just a little, the unease you expect doesn't come on as strong as you expected. 

Maybe it's the sense that you get to go back into that room with a group of guys who accept you for who you are and have never made you feel lesser. 

When you get back to the rec room, Price has returned, and the room is cast in darkness. The Captain gives you a nod, but offers no further comment--which means he won't be addressing it tonight. 

You get comfortable on the couch between Soap and Ghost, and try to ignore the groans as you make suggestion after suggestion that they all hate, and you eventually settle on something all of you have seen before. 

You snuggle under the blanket with Soap, and feel euphoric when Ghost wordlessly accepts your toes wiggling under his thigh. Every once in a while, you'll meet the eyes of your captain and see his fond gaze, or Gaz will look to you when there's something funny so he can see if you're laughing too. 

Right there, on that couch, you feel at home with your brothers, with yourself. 

[seancekitsch]

ok im resending cause i either forgot to send or tumblr ate it! so i know versions of this concept have been done before im eternally weak for jealous/possessive/dom adrian chase fics.

i wanted to request something where adrian and the reader are bffs they're very touchy feely and flirty but it never goes anywhere. reader gets frustrated waiting for adrian to make a move and sets out to make him jealous...it works a little too well, he snaps, smut ensues.

hehehe sorry this is late my entire house and life fell apart but here it is!!!

This doesn’t really feel the way you thought it would. It was a bad idea really. You know Adrian better than this and you’re fucking stupid for thinking this would work. 

Adrian Chase, your best friend of the past five years, the man you share a bed with more often than not because you get sleepy after long hours hanging out, your partner on any missions, your defacto person to make up ridiculous and convoluted bits with on your very limited down time. 

But the flirting banter and the touching have gotten more intense, and you find yourself almost miserable when he gets up in the morning and leaves your little cuddle pile of blankets and limbs. Every time you think he’s going to make a move, to do something, he just… doesn’t. 

Now that you think of it, you could have made a move at any time. You could have been the one to pull him in for a kiss at any time between your constant bantering and snuggling on his couch. You absolutely did not need to be trying to make him jealous right now and having the worst conversation of your life.

Adrian’s eyes are set with pure anger at the back of the head of the guy youre talking to right now, and you keep trying to avoid looking at him. This guy… Angelo? Papa John? Something Italian, you think, is a bro in all senses of the word. He offered to buy you a drink and brought you a vodka cran, something you never drink but if it means you can talk to him without gagging in disgust, so be it.  He’s talking about his old frat days and you’re nodding and giving your best “wow, that’s crazy!” where it feels appropriate. But now he’s trying to put his arm around you and lazily waving at the bartender to get you another drink. 

“She doesn’t need another drink,” A voice cuts in, this one somehow both a needed comfort and a spike of unease. 

“And you are?” The guy asks, and it gives you the distraction you need to sneak out from under his arm. 

“That’s my girlfriend, actually. Yeah, I know I look like a late bloomer but some chicks actually go for that,” Adrian retorts, looking proud of himself as he definitely flexes his muscles. You don’t even have time to think about the fact that Adrian upgraded you to girlfriend because the guy’s voice cuts through your train of thought.

“You with him?” he asks you, pointing at Adrian in disbelief before turning to him, “Well she let me buy her two drinks and get cozy, so maybe next time keep your bitch on a tighter leash.”

Oh fuck no. 

Adrian looks angrier than you’ve ever seen him. Anger isn’t really an emotion he holds, and if he does it’s very brief. You’ve seen him kill a room full of people while smiling before. 

“I hope you didnt actually say that, bro,” Adrians voice drips with venom, “because that was really sexist of you. And while thats not against the law, it’s fucking gross and you don’t talk to her especially like that.”

And with that, Adrian doesn’t wait for his response, he just shoves him against the bar and stalks off. Adrian is certain to get your group banned from the bar sooner rather than later, but at least he didn't hit him. You don’t spare a glance at the guy to chase after your friend. 

“Adrian!” you shout, trying to catch up to him as he marches into the parking lot. He doesn't slow his pace for you.  

“Adrian, slow the fuck down,” you pant, jogging the rest of the way to where he’s fumbling with his keys at the door of the Vigilante-Mobile. 

His jaw is still clenched when he turns around, the anger still rippling under the muscles of his handsome face, distorting and changing him. 

“Why? So I can keep watching you let men that don’t respect you and smell like salami touch you? Then what? By the end of the night you’re going to go home with them and I don’t get a sleepover buddy and you’re going to fuck them and smell like salami too.” he’s ranting, and there’s hurt laced into his voice there. You ignore the slight offense you feel at him thinking you’d let that guy fuck you. 

“No,” you scoff, “I was going to thank you. You know, for standing up for me.”

“Oh,” he seems genuinely surprised by that, “You’re welcome.”

His face doesn’t soften though, your goofy friend doesn’t ease up. 

Fuck, this is weird. 

“Do you wanna… go back inside?” you offer, and your voice does nothing to hide how unsure you are. 

“You can,” he answers, finally finding the right key on his keyring. 

“Adrian, cmon, I’m sure we aren’t—“ kicked out. Kicked about is what you were about today. 

“If you’re just going to let someone else put their arm around you or buy you drinks then I want to go home and watch Kill Bill,” Adrian is serious. Fuck.

And what feels like a missing puzzle piece falls into place. 

“Adrian… are you jealous?”

“What?” his voice jumps half an octave, and you’ve got him. 

“No.”

“Seemed like it.”

“No!” he gets a bit more indignant. It’s cute.

“So if I went back in there…” you trail off, finding it hard to hide your smile as you continue to poke the bear.

“Do whatever you want!” 

He yanks the drivers side door open and you realize just how much you fucked this up. 

“Oh shit Adrian wait don’t leave!”

He stops mid sit, freezing in a goofy squat. 

“I was trying to make you jealous,” you admit. 

“Well that’s stupid, you can’t make me jealous.”

Fuck it, you have to explain it. You were hoping he’d just get so mad he’d bend you over the hood of the Sebring, but now you have to explain your sexually frustrated thought process. 

“Shit, well. I thought if I made you jealous you would…” you shrug, and he stands back up, “I don’t know, make a move or something?” 

You have literally never wanted to curl up and die more than you do in this moment. 

“I thought you were the smart one out of the two of us,” Adrian says, crossing the distance between the two of you. 

You furrow your brows at him, worried that if you speak you might end up saying something even worse… or crying. 

“If you wanted me to kiss you or something you should have just asked! You know I don’t understand social cues.”

Okay, he’s right. Thats on you. 

You nod, and Adrian reaches out to grab your arm. 

“So, I guess this is me asking,” you weak confirm, focusing your eyes on the glare from the streetlight on Adrian’s glasses. 

“Thank god,” Adrian breathes a sigh of relief, “It was so hard to hide all those boners!”

An unintended bark of laughter leaves your lips, all of your anxiety and nerves immediately melting away as he pulls you in for a kiss, not giving a shit that you’re laughing against his lips. He kisses you hungrily, sloppy and wild and his hands are all over you. You’re on autopilot with your hands finding their way to the back of his neck, balling your fists in the material of his sweater. His hands reach lower, and you break the kiss with a gasp when he squeezes your ass hard. 

“Let’s go,” you pant, and he nods, only letting go of you to slap your ass while you practically run to the passenger side of the car.

You don’t even remember the drive from the bar to his house. No, you only remember his hand firm at the top of your thigh, his middle finger dipping between your thighs every so often to tease you. He has you whining and hot all over by the time he’s parked at his apartment complex and leading you up the stairs. 

He moves the same way he does through a mission, his front door slamming against his entryway table and shaking it, practically knocking over the key bowl. 

“Get on the bed,” he commands, not at all hiding his desperation as he kicks off his sneakers, “get on the fucking bed.”

You waste no time yourself throwing your jacket and purse and shoes into a corner and then throwing yourself onto the bed face first. 

By the time you’re rolled over onto your back Adrian stands in the doorway, flicking the lights on. 

“Ready?” he asks, and you nod. Immediately, he climbs himself onto the bed on top of you, pressing his hips into yours.

“Been ready,” you confirm, and he pulls at his sweater, shrugging it down his shoulders as he captures your lips in a kiss again. This kiss is no less desperate than the first, as if Adrian is trying to consume everything that is you. 

He wrestles with your clothes, gripping and pulling until youre bare beneath him, your bare legs parted around his jean clad thighs.

“Thought you could make me jealous,” he laughs, his glasses sliding low on his nose as he smirks. 

“I’m sorry,” you whine, his hands leaving trails of fire in their wake down your ribcage. He gropes at your chest, tracing every swell and expanse. 

“Are you?” he asks, and you nod profusely. His hands dip further down, tickling at your navel before teasing at your core.

“Are you?” He repeats. 

“Yes,” you gasp, his hand dipping down further and just barely touching where you want him.

“Making me jealous isn’t very nice, is it, baby?” he asks, and there’s something predatory in his eyes. You fucking love it. 

“No,” you answer him as he ducks his head down and starts pressing sloppy kisses into the underside of your jaw and the pulse point of your neck. Fuck, you feel white-hot on fire, everything too much and not enough. 

“You gonna be a good girl for me now?” he asks, his breath hot against your neck. You can only nod. 

“Better be,” he demands, his hands leaving where they tease you to unbuckle his belt and push his pants and boxers down in a fluid motion. You curl into yourself a little to look at him, not at all feeling ashamed at wanting to catch a glimpse of Adrian’s dick. 

"M' Gonna be so good for you," you sigh, desperate as he presses his now bare thighs back against yours, his rock hard length brushing against you.

"Shut up," he grunts, and then back tracks, "Not in a sexist way, but god I can't concentrate when you sound so hot."

You listen, and obey, nodding again before kissing his neck now, smooth from a fresh shave and reveling in the happy hum from his lips when your lips and tongue get to work.

“That was so mean,” he gasps, struggling to talk as you give him the same treatment he gave you, “Earlier tonight. Didn’t have to flirt with a ninja turtle. I woulda kissed you so many times if I knew you wanted me to.” 

You moan against his skin at his words, and let his hands drift low again. Your hands graze against his nipples, his abs, his hips. 

“Fuck me,” you whisper, daring your fingers to go lower, but wanting him to go lower first. 

“You want me? Not him?” 

You nod. 

“Gonna make you forget his name.”

You don’t bother telling him you don’t remember the guys name anyway, not when he pushes in ever so slowly and letting you feel every centimeter of him a he sinks himself into you. You sigh in delight, a dazed smile overtaking your lips as he bottoms out. 

“That’s a good girl,” he breathes, not at all hiding how you’re effecting him either, “So right for me.”

And he's right, you're so right for him, he's so right for you. Everything about this feels so correct and perfect.

“Move, please move, please,” you beg, breathless and almost delirious in pleasure. You’ve never felt so full in such a lovely way, in a way that fits you and feels so good that you could scream from this alone. 

He obeys, finally pushing his glasses up as he can focus in on your face and watch what he does to you.  Adrian leans up, opting to grab your hips as he gets on his knees to tilt your hips and snap into you. He holds you in place, his thumbs digging into your hips in a way that’s sure to bruise but you’ll wear those bruises with pride, happy to carry him with you even after this. 

“Adrian!” you shout, your breath trapping in your throat. 

“That’s right, this is for me,” He grits his teeth as he answers you, forcing all of his strength into the snapping of his hips, the force of him fucking you. 

“All—All for… you,” you struggle to get out, the angle leaving you short for breath but god, you could never imagine your first time fucking Adrian better than this. 

“Fuckin right you are,” his lips curl up into an almost sneer, but his eyes are full of love. It’s so hard for him to hide himself from you, even if he says he doesn’t understand emotions, he shows them. 

You pull him down to kiss him, even if this puts him at an awkward angle, he kisses you happily; like a man drinking from a fountain after walking through a desert. He kisses full of love and passion and his hips never slow their pace, always hitting the spot that makes you gasp, always pushing you closer to the edge. 

“I—,” your breath hitches, and with a particular harsh thrust from Adrian you can finish the thought.

“I love—,” he starts to respond, and then stops everything. His speaking, his thrusting, everything. 

“Shit, sorry, forget I said that!” he urges.

But you’re stuck, frozen. You heard the end of that sentence even if he didn’t want you to. 

“I’m sorry; fuck. Sorry.” He moves, as if he’s going to pull out, and then you snap into action.

“No!” you shout, startling yourself and him. You anchor your ankles around his back and hold him in place. 

“I love you!” you blurt out. Adrian relaxes, only slightly. 

“Adrian I love you so much I tried to make you jealous to get you to kiss me please please don’t leave,” you beg, ready to do anything in your power to keep him where he is. 

“You… do?” he asks, and again tonight, you nod profusely. 

“Fuck yeah,” he whispers, and resumes his position. 

You think you hear him say “I knew it” but you can’t be sure over the rush of blood you hear in your ears as he resumes his pace and sets every nerve in your body on fire. If you were ready to come before, you’re on overdrive now. Adrian spares no inch between your bodies and kisses everything he can reach, ever practically folding you in half to do so. 

“Fuck I’m—“ 

“Do it,” he answers, giving you permission for everything to want. It only takes a few more thrusts, the drag of his hips against you, the friction between you, to drive you to oblivion. You come in staccato, your body seizing and shaking quickly in succession, your breath and moans stifled and punctuated as if by impossible beats; Adrian guides you through all of it. For a supposed late bloomer, he knows what he’s doing to take care of someone. 

He slows, but never stops his pace, until you come back to him. Adrian kisses your face all over, holding you tight to bring you back to your senses. 

It’s not until you start kissing back that he starts up his pace again. 

“Fuck, I’m gonna… soon,” he works out between thrusts, hoping for your guidance. 

“Do it, do it please,” you beg, wanting everything he can give you. “Where should I…?”

“In… Fuck, inside if you want.”

“What do you want?” he asks, so gentlemanly it makes you want to punch him. 

“Inside!” you almost shout, the word comes pushed out through a moan because he hits that spot inside again that drives you wild. 

“Fuck…” he stalls, and then his hips stutter, and it’s hot. He releases full into you, all over warm like the first sip of soup. You feel safe as he stills again and the lowers himself on top of you, kissing your jaw and neck. 

“Adrian, fuck, Ade,” You whisper, not sure what you’re asking. 

He picks his head up immediately.

“What’s up?” he asks.

“This won’t change sleepover night, right?” you ask, in the lamest way possible.

“Is this sarcasm I should pick up on?” 

You only hug him closer as you laugh.

[pasta-in-the-pudding]

Stumbled across this blog and ah, my heart is blessed! If you’re still taking request, is it possible for you to have Ticci Toby, Masky, Hoody, EJ, and Jeff celebrating the teen!reader’s (kinda like unofficial siblings) birthday?

So many sibling asks lately!

Thank you so much for requesting!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Masky

Tim's never been a birthday guy, but he wants yours to be special

And so, he wakes up a little earlier than usual, throws on some clothes, and hops into his car to go to the store

He picks up your favorite cake mix, your favorite icing, and last but not least, your gift

He then heads home and begins to set everything up

He bakes the cake as best he can, and it actually doesn't look half bad

He throws on some candles, and then gets to work on wrapping your gift

By the time he is done, it is late enough into the morning that you should be awake

He walks up to your room and knocks, when he receives no response he opens your door and finds you sound asleep

He walks over to your bed and shakes you gently

"Hey, wake up" he mutters to you

As you begin to wake up, he tells you to close your eyes as he leads you to the kitchen

Once in the kitchen, he uncovers your eyes

You smile at the scene around you

"Do you like it?" He asks, still standing behind you

You nod and go to sit at the table

He lights the candles and brings you your cake "make a wish" he says, leaning against a chair next to you

You think for a moment, before blowing out your candles and smiling at your wish

Tim stands and grabs a knife "alright, since its your birthday you get the first slice. I also cant promise that it'll still be here by the time you come back for more, you know how Toby and BEN are." He says with a chuckle as he cuts you a slice

You eat your cake cheerily and open your gift, before heading back up to your room to plan what you wanna do for the rest of the day

Hoodie

Hoodie loves birthdays

He ends up being the party planner for most birthdays because of how well he coordinates them

So when your birthday comes up, he gets super excited

He'll decorate your entire room while you're asleep

Streamers, banners, balloons, you name it, it's there

After he's done decorating he goes and makes you a homemade cake with your favorite flavors of icing and mix

He then goes out and buys your favorite snacks and drinks for your mini party

And he's already had your gifts for months now, just waiting to be given to you

When you wake up, he suprises you with your favorite breakfast in bed

Then its onto the gifts

And in the afternoon, you get your cake!

Accompanied by some of the creeps you are close with, singing you happy birthday

Speaking of the other creeps

Expect to get lots of "happy birthday y/n!" Alllllll day

Yeah, brian has not stopped ranting about how excited he is

So now almost the entire manor is aware of your special day

You might even get some more gifts from those who are close to you!

Eyeless Jack

He's not super huge into birthdays either, but since your his sibling, he'll make an exception for you

He makes a quick run to the grocery store, getting a premade cake and a few decorations

He then gets permission from slender to reserve the picnic table in the garden all afternoon for just you, him, and a few other friends of yours

He sets the cake, few decorations and drinks up, and then goes to get you

Honestly his gift would probably be a book 💀

"You can never learn too much"

Don't worry, all your friends bring you gifts too

Ones you'll actually use

Definetly the most boring one to celebrate your special day with

Im sorry 💀

Jeff the Killer

Jeff gets really excited about birthdays

Usually his most excited about his own

But he makes an exception for you and Liu

His parties are kind of half assed though

He gets a store bought cake and just grabs something random for a gift

"Oh wow jeff thank you! its a....app controlled heated blanket??"

"I saw it and thought of you 🫶"

Liu is more thoughftul

He gets you something you actually want

And if he isn't sure what you want, he just gives you a bunch of cash so you can get whatever you want

Jeff would also be adamant that you go out on your birthday

He knows you're only a teen, but he would love to take you out to a concert

Which if course, teens can go to concerts

But the older members of the manor aren't exactly too fond of the idea

He doesn't care though

Fuck those old people

Hed totally get you tons of merch

You'd come back really late at night, totally partied out

But boy was it fun

Ticci Toby

Toby gets really excited for your birthday

Since youre the only family he has left, he wants to make sure that your special day is, well...special!

He gets a ton of decorations ahead of time, as well as a bunch of gifts (as many as he can afford)

The day of, he will spend the entire morning making sure you stay out of the ballroom while he and a few other creeps decorate

He goes all put throwing an amazing party for you, making sure it would be up to your standards

He invites all of his and your friends to come celebrate with you

He tries to make a cake, but hes not a good baker so it turns out a little ugly

But other than that the party is perfect!

All of the attending creeps sing you happy birthday, and you almost drown in a sea of gifts

Also, so many pictures are taken

So many

By toby himself, and other creeps

[saphirered]

Heyy!! So lately I've been in a very domestic, fluffy feel. SOOO NOW IM PROJECTING THAT onto this request rq teehee. I was wanting to do one for Percy, with season two out I missed the angsty gunslinger on screen. Set after the campaign, maybe during winter's crest? As of you and Percy coming back to whitestone for the occasion, its decided to round up all of Vox Machina. For a night of fun amongst friends, with a whole lot of ale to go around and stories to tell. Percy seems distant lately, staying more to his workshop and genuinely his own tasks. Not like his workshop isn't already a second room, it's just ODD to say the least. As the day rolls around, everyone starts to arrive at whitestones castle. With happy greetings and laughs, that night's activities begin. To sum it up , Percy proposes to reader. Thinking it would be a nice gesture to pull. Also cause I know this extra bitch would make a ring for you. I know it sounds cheesy but like hear me outtt!! The moment just sounded so sweet to me and I NEEDED to send this in. I'm a sucker for this cute content <3 Byeee Saph!!! :D

A proposal you asked for, a proposal you'll get. Fluff and cheese and all of the things. Sorry for the wait but I hop the 3.6k word count made up for it. Hope you enjoy and thanks for requesting! 😘

“I’ll be right with you, dear!” He’s spoken and shouted those words over the noise of his ongoing projects far too many times. Percy feels somewhat guilty for all but banishing you from his workshop and hiding this one secret project of his. He’s been so caught up in it; it has to be perfect after all. But that did mean he couldn’t spend as much time with you and his mind is elsewhere whenever he does leave his workshop. He’s seen your accepting but sad smiles whenever he wanders off. His heart hurts when he finishes late and you’re already in bed, asleep and alone curled up on your side because he missed yet another dinner. It’s reached the point where he’s been considering just spilling he beans. He doesn’t want to hurt you over some stupid secret but you’re so damn understanding and accepting. Of course you’re disappointed when he does join you for a meal and he informs you he has errands to run and won’t be back until late. You’d simply give him a kiss and wish him good luck. He’s barely seen you outside of your overlapping responsibilities. He just feels bad. But then there’s a breakthrough!

The door to his workshop slams open, or rather off its hinges entirely. Now very few people are able to break a deadbolted several inch thick heavy steel door clean off its hinges and that immediately signals him; it’s not you at that door. Given the shadow that all but blocks the light from entering He knows enough. He’s all but grabbed by the shoulders and lifted from his seat and can barely settle his things before he’s dragged out of his workshop. 

“Come on Percy, you’re not going to let us have all the fun, are you?” Scanlan speaks in a sing-song voice when he’s pushed into the hallway and sees the gnome casually leaning against the wall like the arsehole he is. 

“I was perfectly content finishing my work instead.” He counters but Scanlan wouldn’t have it. 

“We’re having a night out, like old times! Let’s drink dry a tavern! Start some fights!” The gnome tries to persuade him and while anything coming out of Scanlan’s mouth should always be questioned, He can’t help but long for some normalcy. No matter how much he might pretend to hate the ruckus his friends cause which inevitably ended with them getting kicked out of the establishment, district or even city, he likes it and misses it. And before he know it he’s spiralling in memories of you, covering his back while he tries to fight off that minotaur barkeep, and the time where you smashed that stein in pieces thug’s head. He also thinks of the conversations you’ve had, the things you learned about each other, and the sometimes drunken ramblings where your questionable theories actually hold some weight. He misses it all. He misses the glint in your eye right before you’re about to absolutely decimate some card players. He misses your laughter at Keyleth’s horrible jokes, and your caring side when she has a little too much. He misses your little battles of charm with Vex as the two of you attempt to have the group drink for free and negate the expense of the damages done to the establishment or people. 

Percy is so caught in his mind that he automatically walks with when Scanlan and Grog begin to move. He doesn’t even put up a fight. He’ll have this one night. He’ll enjoy it. Then he realises how bloody stupid he is. 

“Excuse me. I’ll meet you there.” He turns on his heels but comes face to face with Grog’s chest.

“Nuh-uh! Pike said she won’t let us have any ale if we don’t bring you back.” Grog pouts at the thought of being refused ale. No surprise there. 

“And what’s your motive?” Percy wonders out loud. He already knows the answer and Scanlan just raises an eyebrow implying the same. 

“You really wanna know?” 

“Point taken.” Percy shakes his head, takes a step back from Grog but that doesn’t mean he’s not craning his neck to stare up at him. “If you have to come along, be my guest. I just need to get something from my workshop. That is all.” Scanlan shrugs at Grog. Grog shrugs back. Scanlan shrugs again. So does Grog. Percy’s already sick of this so he just starts walking and they follow whispering not so inconspicuously. He still choses to block him out.

Once back at the workshop he engages the safety door; not ideal but at least it wards off snoopers. He walks over to his work bench, sits down and pulls open one of the drawers under it. He pulls out two bands of precious metal, notices they’re a bit dirty and quickly cleans them with a rag. He sees Scanlan peeking around the corner. The gnome knows not to enter his workshop but Grog has no such reservations, not even when he tried to ingest some very caustic materials. 

“Ooh! What are those for?” Grog exclaims trying to peak over his shoulder. 

“What? What is it Grog? Get out of the way I can’t see. Ugh.” Scanlan tries to look around the goliath blocking his view right now. 

“Nothing concerning you.” Percy replies but Grog talks over him.

“They’re fancy rings. Super shiny.” He says and Percy just sighs, pockets the set of rings and gets up walking around Grog and back towards the doorway. 

“You’ve been making some jewelled cock rings or something? I might have a commission for ya. Something with diamonds-“ Scanlan keeps going but Percy tunes him out. He’s had plenty of time to practice ignoring the bard after all. They continue their journey to the tavern Vox Machina had chosen.

The Tavern is already lively with people and music by the time they enter. The rest of Vox Machina had already taken up a table and safeguarded it from any thieves with death stares for those who didn’t recognise them. They’d already started dwindling the top shelf by the looks of it. You’re leaning your elbow on the back of Vex’ chair as she plays a game with Keyleth. You point at a card but in doing so, with some sleight of hand exchange it for Vex to gain the better hand. You haven’t noticed him yet, or so it seems. So Percy casually walks up beside you, lets his hand drift to your back to draw your attention and when you look over your shoulder, whatever words he wanted to say, fall completely silent. His lips part but no words leave. You chuckle and rise fully, brush your fingers along his arm and press your lips to his in a greeting. 

“Hello to you too.” You grin when you pull back and Percy’s somewhat come to his senses. You pass some coins to Vex who takes them with a ‘thank you, darling’ and keeps playing her card game with the druid. 

“What was that for?” 

“Well, I may or may not have lost a bet.” You lace your fingers with his and pull him along to the abandoned seats only to see yours has been dragged off to another table. You have half the mind to demand it back but haven’t had nearly enough to drink to start a tavern brawl this early into the night, so you just push Percy to sit in the remaining empty chair and sit yourself down across his lap. 

“Do elaborate.” His arm wraps around your waist as you lean over the table to grab the bottle of wine and an empt glass. You pour a drink and hand it to him while Pike slides over your own glass and you wink a thanks. She raises her cup. 

“Vex said you’d walk through the door willingly because you didn’t want to make a fool of yourself. I said Grog would drag you by the back of your coat while Scanlan loudly announced our esteemed presence to this good folk in song.” He gives you a disapproving look. You hide your smile behind your glass. “Oh please, not as if it would have been unlikely.” The look fades very slowly as it only puts more truth to your statement. Were it any other situation he might have been the victim of just such a scene. 

“I don’t get it! Why do you always keep winning?” Keyleth hiccups and Pike and you share a look as the cleric quickly takes Keyleth’s cup, downs it, and fills it with water before putting it back in its previous place. You exchange a nod. 

“That’s because she’s cheating.” Vex might as well have shot him then and there given the look Percy receives at his comment. 

“Are you calling me a cheater, Percy?” Her eyes narrow leading you to interpose yourself between the two; an easily achieved feat given you’re in his lap. You tap his arm, telling him to let it go.

“I’m merely saying you apply different rules to the game than commonly accepted.” 

“I knew Vex wasn’t cheating.” Grog mumbles but gets his bubble burst pretty quickly. He still doesn’t get it though. An argument ensues though none of it serious. Keyleth tries to steal a card from the deck using her druidcraft but doesn’t pan out well. To be fair, drunk Keyleth and magic use have not and will never go well together, Voice of the Tempest or not. Before you know it some other patrons rather rudely insists you and your friends take this elsewhere or they’ll make you. You should have known the moment Grog smiled, this wouldn’t end well. And in a matter of seconds a fight ensued. It spread like wildfire like any tavern brawl does. You let them fight it out, stay seated with Percy as you two clink your glasses together. 

“So how has your day been?”

“Uneventful until now.” Percy speaks casually. “And yours?” You bite the inside of your cheek in the way he knows you to do when you’re trying to formulate a nice answer as opposed to a more unfiltered one. 

“Eventful. Given our friends arrived a couple of hours ago. You’re welcome by the way. I managed to keep them from exploring the clocktower on their own.” You take a sip of your wine. 

“Oh thank the gods.” He breathes in relief. You spared him a likely disaster. “How will I ever repay you?” He adds a bit more dramatically. Maybe it’s the wine. You laugh. 

“Marry me?” Were he less schooled in proper etiquette he might have spewed across the table. He looks around but no caught on, they’re too occupied in the fight. You’re content being a witness for now it seemed. Percy worries you might have caught on somehow, that you might have figured it out but you don’t let anything show. “I’m joking. Partially. One day. If you ask nicely but for now, think we should help them out?” You gesture to the tavern-wide brawl and save the bottle you two were sharing before someone is thrown onto the table and pummelled right in the face by Pike. 

“Yes. You’re probably right.” He blurts out and downs his whole glass. You down the last bit of your glass, a large swig from the bottle and get up. You offer your hand. Percy takes it as well as  the bottle as you help him to his feet. He feels like he is going to need that booze to deal with the near heart attack you gave him but before he can take a swig of his own he’s forced to turn the bottle into a weapon. Quickly he turns it in his grasp and hits it over the head of some man charging for the both of you. The man didn’t see the blow coming and glass shatters along with the remaining liquid inside. 

“What a waste of a perfectly good chardonnay.” You pout. 

“I’ll get you a new one.” He’ll buy you a whole cellar’s worth if you want. He might actually… 

“My hero.” You joke pulling Percy aside and aiming a high kick at the face of another drunkard coming for the two of you. You peck his cheeks before the fight continues and you’re no longer able to have this brief bubble of solitude. You’re in the fray now but you’re in it together. Together and you kick some ass. It’s magnificent and just as he had thought, it does feel like old times. You’re having a grand old time. He’s not ashamed to admit you saved his ass when he got a little sentimental and couldn’t shake a certain memory or simply stopped to admire your magnificence. 

But all good things get even better when the guard shows up and Vox Machina ends up running like some juvenile troublemakers. The guards didn’t notice who you were and you doubt any of you look like the respected and well known group of heroes in this state and so you took advantage of this. Scram! You ran and enjoyed losing their trail but as a group of stumbling oafs that’s an incredibly difficult thing to do and so you separated. You stuck with Percy pulling him into alleyway and street though he could have pointed out the fastest and quickest way back to the castle. It’s his city after all but he enjoyed living in this moment and when you pushed him against the wall a couple of times pressing close to him while trying to cover your own giggles, you were simply adorable. He was going to make this moment last. By the time you got closer to the castle district you’d been going so long what little booze you had had all but faded. 

“So how about we continue this inside over a bottle of true top shelf from Emon? I brought some from my last visit. I think you’ll appreciate the vintage.” The two of you begin to climb the stairs of Whitestone Castle. 

“That’s a fantastic idea…” You nod satisfied with his answer. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you…” Percy can feel the blood pumping in his ears, his entire body is pulsing. He feels short of breath, and everything is just chaos but so right at the same time. You look over the city. 

“Did you hear that?” You wonder but Percy gently grabs your chin, turns you to face him and standing level with you; the castle to one side, the town to the other. This is it. This is the moment. 

“Tonight was quite enjoyable. I’ve missed times like these. My fondest memories are in the trivial things. I couldn’t help but reminisce-“ You smile and bring your palm up to cup his cheek. 

“Is that why you almost got a barrel to the head and thrown through a window? Because you got distracted?” You jest and peck your lips to his briefly brushing your thumb along his cheekbone. 

“I’m trying to say something nice and you’re making a fool out of me.” He returns in jest. 

“Okay okay. I’m listening. Please continue proclaiming your undying love for me.” He lets his fingers slip into your hair and gives an ever so light tug. “Oi!” You exclaim and roll your eyes at him but smile. You’ve had your fun. He knows you’re joking but little did you know in part that was very much his intention. The irony. He’ll forever hold it over your head. As you would want and expect him to do. He needs to keep you on your toes after all, or you might accuse him of slacking on the job. 

“I’ve not been the partner I should have been for the last few days. I’m aware of my flaws and you have put up with them, you’ve scolded me for them and pulled me out of my own insanities. You keep me walking the path I did not ever think I could. I owe my life, my home, my world to you and I could not ever repay you for what you have given me. I feel my life would be duller without you in it. I’d be lost with out you. Perhaps it is selfish of me to think so but I would love to have you at my side, to be at your side for the rest of our lives.” Rarely does he get you speechless. You always have something to say, some witty remark, some teasing quip or just some input. He’s always welcomed it. He always will but now it is your turn stand there wide-eyed processing his words, lips parted ever so lightly. You had been stroking your thumb along his cheekbone before but your motions had frozen. You try to formulate a response and he awaits patiently. 

“If you’re selfish then so am I. Let us be selfish together.” You smile and pull him into a deep kiss. He still hadn’t asked the question he intended to ask but he’ll take this moment. He gets caught up in it for a while until he breaks the kiss. He leans your head against his, reaches into his breast pocket. Your eyes dart to the side but you decide to ignore whatever caught your attention. He takes one of your hands and within it you feel something cold and metal. 

“Will you marry me?” Percy breathes. This is not what he intended or how he intended it to go but he couldn’t wait. He couldn’t analyse it to death. He couldn’t plan every single detail. This, this was just perfect. No grand displays, no banquet or a fancy ball. Instead it was a night out with a tavern brawl and a run from the authorities. It was perfect and now here, on the steps of his home, at the root of his life in this moment he entangles it with you. 

You look down, at the rings in your hand; two of them, one beautifully detailed but not ostentatious. The set stones are precious and enhance the design. The other is a slightly simpler version, more muted but still beautifully made. You’ve never seen anything like it. They’re unique and that’s when you realise what they’re made from. Your first job with Vox Machina. Percy had given his share to Vex as he always tended to do with his earnings. She resided over the finances. You’d come across a beautifully made silver broach, large and very ostentatious made from platinum and set with the most gaudy aquamarine and diamonds. You’d told him he should keep it; because you thought it matched his eyes and should he ever need a rainy day fund, that piece would make him a king for a day. He’d kept it. He’d kept it all these years. The stones had been cut down to smaller ones and the platinum melted to form the bands. They’re beautiful. They’re perfect and you know Percy well enough he would have trusted no jeweller with this task. He’d have trusted non but his own hands. 

“You made these?” You ask enthralled as you pick up the simpler of the bands. 

“Yes.” He’s practically shaking in anticipation. You take his hand, and place the ring around his finger. 

“If you even for a single second-“ His heart beats so fast he thinks he might pass out. He’d almost be more content facing the Briarwoods as opposed to dealing with this stress. 

“Of course I’ll marry you.” Percy feels like he can breathe again. 

“Oh thank the gods. I thought I might have fainted.” He chuckles as he takes the remaining ring from your palm and places it on your own finger. 

“I’d have caught you.” The image passes through his mind.

“Before or after you had a laugh?” He never said it was a graceful image. 

“Can’t have my husband-to-be mess up his handsome face, now can I?” You grin and press your lips to his entwining your hands. That satisfying feeling; of that cold metal against your skin, and feeling it on his, that’s something out of this world you could not have begun to describe. 

“Excuse me?! You were going to propose all this time and made us miss like half if it?” Scanlan pushes forward, clothes stained by you don’t even want to know what. “I would have made an awesome show! We could have had fireworks, music, hell, I’d even teach Grog an interpretive dance.”

“Intentrepative what now?” The goliath seems more focussed on the leaking barrel of ale on his shoulder. 

“Wait you’re engaged? To who?” Keyleth clearly hasn’t sobered up yet and is leaning on Vex who just pats the girl’s arm. 

“Let’s get you sobered up, Keyleth.” She begins dragging the druid past you and up to the palace but not without a quick “Congratulations.” and the implication of leaving you to enjoy your moment. 

“I’m officiating.” Pike follows suit and begins ushering the others forward as well. You watch them make their way up the stairs. 

“That’s our life in a nutshell, right there.” You claim. 

“I couldn’t agree more.” He takes a step forward and your entwined hands urge you to join. You do without a moment of hesitation, unable to wipe that smile of your face. Neither can Percy by the looks of it. That’s okay. You can be fools tonight. You’ll be fools in the morning still and when people come knocking. You’ll tell them to fuck off and be fools a moment longer. 

“You sure you want to spend the rest of your life with me?” You ask jokingly. 

“Oh yes.” That’ll do. 

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Phullo there, I’d like to ask you a question! I hope I won’t be such a bothersome.

So, I’m planning to write a story about Laughingstock and since I find your storytelling very pleasing I figured it’d be a great idea to ask for your advice about the writing!

My Idea in general for this story is just Howdy taking a day off from working in his bodega. And basically, he’ll be just wearing normal clothes.. shocking truly.

And thennn, Barnaby and Howdy accidentally stumbled into each other’s path. They later then of course had a very long conversation that lasted until evening maybe.

Of course there’ll be some fishy moments like them looking at each other with goggly eyes and other cheesy romantic nonsense- but it’s just mainly them having their usual conversation with a ‘couple’ of jokes here and there. It’s supposed to be a sweet memory for them to remember basically.

So, what I’m really trying to ask you for is- how the heck do you start a story exactly and not make it into just the dialogues? Like, I want my story to be kind of long but I’m afraid it’ll be just them, y’know, talking and I really don’t want it to be boring.. therefore, I really need your help.

I am so sorry if it’s such a bad timing considering the fact that you just had an interview which I am very proud for you for that! Even if it didn’t go as expected at least you did good half of it.

Soo, yeah! I’d very much appreciate your advice and I am sooo sorry that this was soo long!!! And again, a bad timing too.. but hey if you got any time, please consider answering. Thank you..

Also any response yet? On the interview of course.

hmmm... in my experience and Knowledge Accumulated Over The Years via reading And writing... the best place to start is to just drop in. no story introduction, no "it was a dark and stormy night", just Start. it sounds like your story begins with Howdy taking the day off, so maybe kick off with him getting ready / choosing an outfit, or w/ him reflexively almost opening the store before he stops and chides himself for almost forgetting that he's taking the day off

to combat the dialogue, maybe detail him leaving the bodega to go into the neighborhood. what does he see? hear? feel both physically and mentally? is there anyone else out and about? set the scene! ive been struggling with this too lately since i haven't seriously written in a while and i haven't been reading actual books

WHICH! IMPORTANT TANGENTS!! read well-written books, Not fanfic! im not saying dont read fanfic ever or i'd be the world's biggest hypocrite, but also read actual books. it's important to study how published authors write, how stories are structured, dialogue and action. because these books have more often then not gone through a Rigorous screening process. multiple drafts, beta readers, publishers reading it with great scrutiny before agreeing to publish - of course there are exceptions, but a lot of books are the highest quality they can be, and will outshine most fics. because, and i say all of this as good things, fics are unregulated. most dont have beta readers. a lot are from amateur authors new to the scene. there will be spelling mistakes, weird grammar & sentence structure, etc - most fics have Entirely different writing styles from each other. so if you only read fanfic, That is what your brain will learn, and it's gonna be harder for you to write. published books have less variation in styles, and the styles are subtler. there's less spelling mistakes if any, so your spelling will improve. your internal vocabulary will expand. even if you don't consciously study what you read, your brain will pick up on & internalize patterns, how action works, how dialogue works, how to structure a story, all that good stuff. if you want, i can recommend well-written books! i've been an avid reader since... like, ever. i've got recs galore! you can tell me your preferred genre & literary interest and i'll probably have something for you! and if you're not big on books, well... get out of your comfort zone lmao, books are fucking awesome and i guarantee there are plenty out there that you would love.

and when you're writing dialogue, intersperse it with little actions or the main povs' internal dialogue. if there's a natural lull in the conversation, explore that lull! what do the characters do in this moment? what's going on around them? sprinkle bits of setting in so that your reader knows where they are and what's going on.

plus, exploring the non-dialogue sections of your story can, and often will, spark inspiration in your brain for scenes and actions to fill out the story if you want it to be long (but also! if you just want to write the scene of their conversation, that's the beauty of fanfic - there's no requirements. do whatever you want lmao). when Howdy is going into town, maybe Wally calls him over for a quick pose - does Howdy say yes or no, and how does that decision change the story? maybe Julie invites him to join her in a game, or Eddie stops to talk to Howdy about him being out and about. maybe there are some complaints over the bodega not being open. what's the lead-up to Howdy and Barnaby running into each other? do they literally run into each other? what happens when they do? those are just a few possibilities of many!

remember, when you're writing, you're that story's god. you can do literally fucking anything. you decide what the characters do, where they go, what happens in their world. that mindset should help you bolster the plot instead of just "these two characters have a conversation", yk?

i hope this helps!

[sailorgreywolf-german]

Ahhhh Im really bad at picking out prompts but dying for more 19th century ruspru; it's hard to find any that's good and you do it so incredibly well! Maybe "Things you whispered in my ear" but seriously I'll take anything

Prussia was lying on his side reading a letter by the light of a candle. He felt Russia’s breath on the back of his neck, and it was making it hard to focus on the scrawled handwriting.

Russia whispered in his ear, “That is enough for tonight.”

He reached over Prussia’s head and pinched the wick of the candle, plunging the room into darkness, save what moonlight was filtering in through the windows.

Prussia sighed and put the letter on the side table. He replied, “I was not done yet.”

He could not bring himself to truly be mad, not when he felt Russia’s arm wrap around his waist. He did not care about what the letter nearly as much as he cared about being held.

Russia nuzzled his neck and said, “I know. But I do not want to invite Count von Bismarck into my bed.”

Prussia turned towards him and was momentarily captivated by the way that the moonlight played across Russia’s eyes. He had to take a moment before he responded again, “Vanya, you know I have plans that need my attention.”

Russia softly pulled him closer and said, firmly, “I need your attention. I don’t invite you here so that I can watch you read letters to another man.”

He sounded more frustrated that Prussia had anticipated, and it left him at a loss for how to respond. He had promised that he would not cut off contact with Berlin while he was in St. Petersburg. There was far too much moving too quickly for him to be unavailable for even a day.

Prussia brushed a piece of Russia’s hair away from his eyes and then caressed his face, “It sounds so strange when you put it like that. Don’t tell me that you are jealous of the old man of all people. I love you, and I thought I had made that abundantly clear.”

It sounded absurd to say, and he was certain that Russia could not be implying that there was something romantic going on. But he was clearly jealous of the volume of letters.

He saw a shadow pass over Russia’s face, like he was processing some emotion. He finally seemed to decide on saying, “I do not mean it in that way.”

He paused, chewed on his lower lip like he was choosing his words carefully. He finally said, “I love you, Gilbert. But I am not fond of Preussen the politician. He is stealing time from me.”

Prussia sighed. He was not going to deny it entirely. He had been remarkably busy since the plans in the German states started in motion, but he had not thought that anything had fallen by the wayside.

He absent-mindedly touched Russia’s face as he tried to think of what to say. Russia leaned into the touch, like it had been exactly what he wanted when he snuffed the candle.

Prussia had never been eloquent about his feelings, and he had to fight his gut impulse to be a contrarian. But he knew that he owed Russia a response. He felt the way that the other was holding his hip, like he was afraid of him slipping away and he felt like he understood the anxiety.

Prussia said, trying to make what he imagined to be reassuring eye contact, “I made this trip to see you. I know that I have been busy, but I still want to see you. ”

Russia replied with another small sigh, “And why were you late to dinner? What have you been doing all night?”

If not for the uneven light, Prussia would have sworn that he was pouting. He admitted, “I was catching up on my correspondence.”

Russia’s raised eyebrow told him that was the point. And Prussia did understand how it sounded as soon as he said it. Russia sounded annoyed as he said, “I doubt your plans will fall apart if you put the letters away for a night.”

Prussia knew he was right, and that he had perhaps not noticed how much time he had been spending on politics. He conceded, “I’m sorry. I have perhaps been a bit too focused on other things.”

Russia leaned forward and kissed him on the forehead and then planted small kisses down his cheek, saying between them, “I don’t begrudge your success. But I need you too.”

Prussia smiled, “So, no Bismarck in bed?”

Russia confirmed with a brief, “Mmmhmmm” before kissing Prussia on the lips.  

[intertexts]

HIIII ROS i am sorry i never replied to your reply to my ask from a while ago i am so bad at that ;-; in response to that kinda (bc we were talking about jhariah) i did see them live! 3rd concert ive ever been to in my life & it was life changing... i was front row n there was a baby mosh pit n i was with my best friends it was so good <3 i didn't get to see all the songs off TRUST CEREMONY live but if he tours again i will try to get tix because i must see CONTROL BABY live... my faves are control baby n fire4fun n russian doll <3 but it is my fave album ever created (except maybe Måneskin's Teatro D'Ira vol 1)

Dont wanna yap too much but other music im liking rn: Dua Saleh's ROSETTA ep; Missouri Surf Club's songs Rotten & Kingdom Come; Jean Dawson's entire discography generically but specifically SICK OF IT* and New Age Crisis; Ethel Cain's everything; and then im still consistent w the narcissist cookbook, an unkindness, sons of the illustrious father etc. I have been getting into a crazy amount of music since summer started though so there are sooooo many others but i wanna know what you're listening to! i like your music taste as ive said :3

ANYWAY I think i might just send another ask because this is ramble-y n u dont have to reply to it bc its overwhelming but!! Yeah hehe okay p. 1 - mare

HII HI HI no worries!!!!!!! all good i'm also really terrible at it!!!!!! hehe <33 jhariah concert & mosh pit is SO awesome though.. man.. thats so cool.... love that experience for u!!!! <333

checking out all of these rn they're SOO GOOD.... dua saleh ROSETTA ep literally going on the repeat playlist rn omg. ough. how have i not heard them before. holy fucking shit. missouri surf club goood i love the florence influence.... jean dawson & ethel cain WHOO!!!! hell yeag. god. u also have such good music dude. good shit.!!!!!!!

what have i been listening to!!! shit!!! this is gonna be LONG but u asked for it!!! a lot of morcheeba (big calm), de la soul (the grind date), sneaker pimps (bloodsport), tricky (maxinquaye) <- one of my all time faves, madvillainy, cibo matto (viva! la woman), yaeji (with a hammer), chai (wink)... summer to me is usually very hot & humid & sticky & dreamy to me (busted ac) so this is my laying on the floor staring at the fan vaguely dissociating rotation.

other than hip hop & trip hop-- dragon new warm mountain i believe in you by big thief!!!!!! somehow never listened to this one & i'm ill over it. & july flame (other all time fave) by laura veirs & central reservation by beth orton (<- huge recent discovery ill over her voice) & broken social scene self titled for my acoustic rotation...

heavier set: been getting BIG into creature feature they're literally so fun. i think u might like them tbh. american gothic is my fave so far!! summer is for shitty pop punk 2 me!! esp. when i actually have to Do Stuff & not lay on the floor melting. so. we the kings, fall out boy (cork tree & infinity on high), the cab, the academy is..., yellowcard, motion city soundtrack, alkaline trio :]

ALSO special mention 2 blue sky black death (slow burning lights, late nite cinema, noir) bc their instrumentals make me so insanely nostalgic & have been my writing soundtrack for the past month!!!!

[thesherrinfordfacility]

tried to send an ask forgetting my connection's awful rn, so if you're getting this twice rephrased that's why. i'm just gonna try and type it as close to verbatim as i can remember:

i might be on to absolutely nothing, but i think this is interesting with the introduction of the BOL. my bad if i'm repeating things you've gone over a thousand times, but.

it's never made much sense to me to add something so huge so late and not offer any explanation. obviously it'll be a thing in s3, but why wouldn't heaven have used this in s1, if they have no qualms with rewriting history by removing Aziraphale? stopping armageddon entirely sounds like a wayyyy bigger transgression than sheltering gabriel (and crowley, ofc, wouldn't have then managed it without him). they'd at least be equal? if everything's how it seems, it all sort of comes across as a really lazily added threat. i'd rather it wasn't

if book canon can be factored into show theories at *all* at this point, i think this line lends some weight to thinking things are not in fact how they seem. the BOL could really, really, not be a book. i'm just typing words with no meaning at this point, but what if it's got something directly to do with jesus? am i reading ridiculously far into a throwaway line? do i sound as crazy to you as to myself right now

hey @aq-uatic, beloved!!!✨💕 im so sorry i said i'd answer this yesterday but then it fell out of my brain and i forgot about it in my drafts 💀

i have however ruminated on the bit from the book you've screenshotted and i'll come back to it in a minute (because Oh Boy), but im totally with you on the BOL thing -

i know i tagged you in another ask response because the same kinda thing came up, but yeah im still a little confused on why they didn't threaten it when aziraphale derailed the apocalypse? it's such an op weapon to have tucked in their back pocket (same as the miracle blocker, tbh), and it not have been even alluded to in s1/book?

the only thing i can attribute it to is that a) only the supreme archangel or above technically has the power to use it, b) michael assumes they have that power bc they insert themselves as supreme archangel duty officer, and c) heaven never does seem to change its passwords*

but then it further brings into question what is so different between gabriel and michael that gabriel would prefer to punish aziraphale by execution, instead of BOL'ing him (and therefore risk unmaking so much shit that happened because of aziraphale)... compared to michael who goes straight to the nuclear option? this further brings up some possibilities:

michael is an idiot to consider it, and gabriel is clever enough to know not to use it (both eventualities are... debatable)

michael misunderstands what the BOL actually is, that's it's not what they have told us - the audience - it is, and it does something else.

so yeah let's consider that all the archangels know of its existence (uriel and saraqael do not seem to react when michael threatens aziraphale of it in ep6), but only SA has the authority to use it, but michael is not actually SA... well, is there actually an instance where michael would truly know what it does? arguably not, not unless they went looking in the files on the BOL* which, presumably, in their arrogance, they did not.

(by the by, this could also suggest that AWCW was not an archangel - if all the archangels knew of the BOL, but he thought it was just a rumour to frighten the younger angels, then he evidently did not seem to have known that it was real. could however be something to do with his seemingly faulty memory, though - the fact that he doesn't seem to remember the BOL?)

(ALSO if the BOL is indeed to erase existence, as a punishment against angels, and this concept existed pre-fall/before the earth was created etc (given what crowley says in ep1), did aziraphale know about it? is this what punishment he appears to be afraid of when AWCW starts asking questions? would that mean that aziraphale was an archangel or was privy to archangel-level info?)

okay unrelated mental gymnastics over (before i talk myself into a hole, but also worthwhile notes @me to remember) - let's talk about the adam quote!✨

it's interesting to think, because how far do we consider adam's powers as the antichrist? could consider it as the exact mirror of, yk, jesus, or as a hereditary power from his father - former SA and now literal satan. we know he can resurrect the dead, he did so in s1; to resurrect 25 people equates to the power "only the mightiest of archangels" would have (according to shax, though, so - pinch of salt here). but ultimately he has the power and ability to unmake reality, full stop. even if we ignore the exact wording from book!canon, we have this in the show:

do we take this as adam having the same power as the BOL? yeah, think that's fair to say, (especially if we consider that, from the christian bible, jesus appears to be the one to wield the BOL, revelation 3:5), and i definitely think you're onto something... but what does it mean? does that mean the BOL doesn't even exist? that adam would be able to counteract the BOL? gonna need to think on it more, but i also think it might be something to do with this:

💀✨

[milf-n-dilf-dippin-dots]

IM GOING TO KILL IM GOING TO KILL IM GOING TO KILL

Last night my roommate and I got some drinks- i shared some soju w him and hit the hay after packing away some stuff n tidying/rinsing etc

I leave at 9am this morning, 3 bottles of soju on the table, 2 cans of sprite and some snacks on the table "oh its fine, he knows im out im sure he'll tidy and throw out some of the counter rubbish for me :>"

Come home at 4pm

The only thing thats been done is the 8 dishes that were in the sink (lil cups, 2 bowls from dinner and cooking utensil) not including the pan on the stove

Nothing thrown away!! Im going crazy!!!!!!!!!

Be so fr gang, am i like. Blowing it out of proportion? Or is the fact that im the primary cleaner of the house insane.

Important note is that i have no choice but to be the person who does mostah the cleaning- because he sleeps 12 hours a day, waking up around 2 or 3 pm and not going to bed until 5 or 6 am.

I went away for 2 nights n i come home and hes like "oh i could finally get stuff done because im only productive at 4am"

Which hey man sure dude you do you i dont care what you do in yer free time-

But my ass isnt gonna go 'yes! Sure! You can vacuum and wash dishes late at night/early am! Even though it keeps me awake because i cant close my door!'

But i also dont want to end up being this dudes damn mother the fucking manchild doesnt even know how to mop properly- or vacuum properly! And he doesnt vac the carpet! Or wipe down the oven/benches after using em! Like cmon man!!

"Oh but maybe he didnt get taught!"

Dawg i am his roommate, at what point is it my responsibility to teach a whole entire dude how to take care of his surroundings. I saw his room when he moved out- it was bad. This dude borders of raw negligence of his surroundings, and if it wouldnt cause me the harm i would stop cleaning up after him just so hed suffer. And he leaves the tap running to wash dishes.

I dont know what i expected tbh- his parents built 2 houses for their kids next to their 2 storey spiral staircase chandelier having house.

Im fighting for my fuckin life over here- 300 rent a week, 125 a fortnight for a couch, 50 a month for wifi, etc while this dudes like "yeah i paid all my rent a month in advance, and i get my money from dividense" it makes me want to break his trachea.

Like lets be fr i am blatantly not a pleasant person, moreso in high doses, and moreso when i have to deal w someone who fucks their own life even when theyve gotten dealt the perfect hand of cards to do well.

Like, yeah man im sorry you cheated on your girlfriend of multiple years for 5 whole months then got sad about it and became an insomniac but im not gonna suffer your shit schedule and not sleep well because you wont see a therapist or take meds. Like is that my problem? To be clear im not a cunt to his face, but i am a cunt. And i am annoyed at him. Maybe i should commune like a normal person, but that involves me sitting this dude down to tell him he needs to pay attention to things like 'responsibility' and 'reasonable expectations'.

He had guests over a while ago and i ended up cooking for them all!! And cleaning up after them!! And making breakfast the next morning!! He apparently makes 1800 a fortnight and he spends almost all of that. He owes me money!! Sometimes i pay for groceries n he just has to pay me back! Like dude???

[raid3r-r4bbit]

@fuzzydreamin thanks for the lol. ive been a little busy with life so sorry for the late response.

Favorite Color:

Green. Like Blindingly Neon almost yellow bile/acid toxic hazmat pukey green. Also black. I'm also a fan of earthy tones, warm greys and browns, rusty orangey reds, and i also unironically love that "some smoker lived here for 5+ years but i swear the walls are white" sepia color.

Last song:

Either Childish Flamingo or 1x1. I've been hopping in between really screamy and just goofy shit atm because i cant focus with anything else. 🤷 But (I also jsut got a new BMTH hoodie) BMTH's post human album has been feeding me. It's a really good (visual? no.) example of that like just angry and over it nihilist feeling and I just *MUNCH CRUNCH AAAA* like i feel like it could be just the tiniest bit angrier and louder but i think that's my headphones.

as for childish flamingo, its like that miseryxcpr thing imo. It's goofy and funny and it slaps. and it's so catchy. it's like right on the edge of aha funny and fuck you street and i love it. i hope any of that makes sense im sorry lol.

Last movie:

the Demon Slayer movie. I skipped all the way to the end to see the fight between Akaza and Rengoku because they're two of my favs ( in order from that show: Uzui (my mom calls yuzu (my cat) Uzui and its adorable) Akaza and Rengoku. I Found out the english dub is out (im way behind) and just needed to hear their english voice acting. all of it is amazing and Akaza's lil gigles during the fight make me incredibly happy. Guys who laugh/giggle mid combat? Ugh >\\x//<

Currently Watching:

Demon Slayer, Chainsaw man, Tokyo ghoul (im rewatching a bunch of animes) Steven universe. (i love all of these and full recommend them. I literally just yesterday(or the day before idk time is a blur) got a new funko pop, it's the half-kakuja kaneki and i love it.)

Other stuff i've watched this year:

Spy x Family, the Junji ito Collection, Yamishibai (if you like picture style art and horror this is great, its somewhat junji ito like, but shorter stories and ngl the zanbai ep scared me a bit) psychpass (some reccomended this to me cause im (obviously) a fan of darker more gruesome shows, and it is very dystopian, love the art work, but i just dont get it.) Given (if you havent watched this show please watch it its amazing) Yuri on ice, Banana Fish (also another fave)

(I work from home, and pretty much exist at my computer, and need to keep on music or tv to keep the bad thoughts out, so i have a lot of time and opportunity to watch stuff ok)

Shows I dropped this week:

Psycho pass. again, i just couldnt get into it. I know a lot of people seem to really like and it full seems like a show that would be up my alley. that first ep was kind of a lot though. I'm not ashamed to admit i love shows that are unafraid to show nudity and violence but the two together (ifykyk) make me uncomfortable. If this case had been a little further in the show i think it would have been fine, but it's litterally the first like ten minutes of the show. I also tried watching this a few week ago while at wasteland but we were pretty much just out the door.

Devil May Cry. I still love the games and the characters, and i remember loving the anime as a kid but its just... so different from the games lmao.

Currently Reading:

random internet stuff, fics and shit. I feel bad because i used to go to the library all the time but at the same time, i dont really have the room to store a whole bunch of books and despite being super dyslexic, i read insanely fast, so renting/buying books isnt worth it to me. (i've read entire full length series in the span of a day or two, while doing other stuff. I need longer, more conveniently packaged novels and that typically comes in the form of fanfiction. )

tagging: @snowmutant @ivanpahdrylakeracer @glaochormfitheach(idk if ur cool tagging you in this kinda stuff, if not just lmk i though it'd be fun :D) @the-soup-witch(im dragging you into tumblr culture whether you like it or not, welcome to tagging games)

[theclosetedskeleton]

heyyy hey hai!!!! just a reminder little that ^_^

i love youuu!!!! sososososooo very incredibly much. more than words and numbers could ever think about describing. even if the right words/numbers did exist, it still wouldnt be enough to accurately describe just how much. the amount is just incomprehensible. you are the light of my life, my everything, the brightest star in the entire night sky. you make everything better when things are bad. everyday whenever i wake up, even if im unsure if the day will be good, i always have talking to you to look forward to. you make me the happiest every single fucking day just by existing. even if we dont talk on somedays, just the idea of you makes me so giddy. i will do legitimately anything and everything just to make you as happy as you make me. it doesnt matter what that entails. if i have to construct a new invention no one has ever seen before just to get a grin out of you? well you can consider me already working on it. youre in my mind 24/7 and i really cant go 5 minutes without thinking about you, how you are, what youre doing, etc. you are the most amazing, kindest, talented, and just. best person ive met. ever. i dont know what the future holds, and it kind of scares me, but all i know is that whatever itll throw at me as long as im with you, everything will be okay. i love everything about you. your perfections, imperfections (i say this in a way as if theres any imperfections in your eyes. youre absolutely perfect to me <3), your art, your humor, your jokes, your silly images you make, your bracelets, everything. i really mean that. you can always, and i mean ALWAYS, talk to me if there is ANYTHING bothering you. i will always he here for you, no matter what. time, day, place, doesnt matter. you NEVER bother me. never have and never will. i love hearing you ramble about things and i could listen to you all day. i care about you more than anything could describe. if it was possible, i would make all the bad and nasty things in your life go away. you dont deserve anything of what youve been put through. 

you are fucking amazing. dont you ever forget that.

i love you so much ez <33333333/gen/qp!!!!!

HIIII IM SO SOS SO SORRY FOR THE LATE RESPONSE I DIDNT HAVE THE MOTIVATION TO REPLY TO THIS SORRY

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EAHGDH <3333333333333333!!!!!

I LOVE YOU TOO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO SOS SSOSOSOO SO VERRY EVERY VERYER MUCHHH !!!!!! THE WORDS THAT EXIST AND MORE CANT EVEN DESCRIBE THAT!!!!! THE AMOUNT IS FUCKING INCOMPREHESIBLE.!!!!! YOU ARE MY ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING. THE LITERAL REASON I GET OUT OF BED IN THE MORNING !!! IM ALWAYS SO FUCKING HAPPY WE GET TO TALK, EVEN ON THE DAYS WE DONT GET TO/BARELY DO !!!!! THE THOUGHT OF YOU MAKES ME THE HAPPIEST PERSON ON THE PLANET OH MY GOD !!!! EVERYTHING REMINDS ME OF YOU. !!!! ALL THE SONGS YOU SHOWN ME, YOUR FAVORITE COLOR, THOSE SILLY WOLF IMAGE SYOU USE ALL THE TIME, FALL, ETC !!!! THERE DOESNT GO A SINGLE MOMENT WHERE I THINK ABOUT YOU, IF I COULD I'D HAVE YOU HERE WITH ME ALL THE TIME <333 you make EVERYTHING so sos SOOO MUCH BETTER !!!! I COULD BE HAVING THE WORST DAY I EVER HAD AND YOU WOULD LITERALLY MAKE IT THE BEST DAY OF MINE !!!!!!!!!!! IM LITERALLY SO LUCKY TO HAVE YOU HERE. I DONT FUCKING KNOW HOW I HAVE YOU IN MY LIIFE, BUI IM SO HAPPY I DO!!!!!! I'D DO ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING FOR YOU !!! LIKE I MEAN THAT. DO YOU WANT ME TO COLLECT THE STARS FOR YOU? GO ON VC WITH YOU? OR JUST BE WITH YOU? CONSIDER ME ALREADY DOING THAT. YOU ARE THE LITERAL MOST AMAZING. KIND. AWESOME BEST FUCKING PERSON LIKE. EVER !!! I MEAN THIS!!!! I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU. THERE IS NOTHING, AND I EAN NOTHING THAT I WOULD CHANGE ABOUT YOU, I LOVE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE !!!! YOURE PERFECT IM MY EYES, AND IT DOESNT MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, YOU ALWAYS WILL BE !!!! I WILL ALWAYS ALWAYS (SHAKES YOU BY THE SHOULDERS) ALWAYSSS BE THERE FOR YOU !!!!! IT DOESNT MATTER HOW BIG OR SMALL SOMETHING IS BOTHERING YOU, OR IF THERE IS ANYTHING BOTHERING YOU, I WILL ALWAYS BE THERE FOR YOU !!!! I WILL NEVER. EVER. EVER LEAVE YOU, IF I NEEDED TO, I'D CLAW MY WAY JUST TO TALK TO YOU AGAIN. FUCK EVERYTHING THATS IN OUR WAY, ILL BE THERE WITH YOU UNTIL WE DIE, AND LONGER THAN THAT !!!! ID TAKE ANYTHING THAT WOULD EVER BE BOTHERING YOU AND MAKE IT SO THAT WAY YOU'D NEVER SEE THOSE ISSUES AGAIN!!!!!!

YOU ARE SO FUCKING AMAZING AS WELL!!!!!1 I LOVE YOU SO MUCH RICKY !!!!!!!!! <333333333333333/GEN/QP

[miss-styles]

Ok wait I have a question if you feel comfortable answering on your blog! I really want to have casual sex, but my dilemma is that I’m a virgin and I would need someone to be very patient reassuring and understanding with me that first time or first few times, but I feel like that’s difficult to find when you’re hooking up especially with men. I really wish I would’ve lost it already so that I would feel more comfortable and experienced having sex with other people. Like although I haven’t ever had sex before, I just think I would really enjoy it because I love intimacy. So idk how to overcome this because I don’t want to be in a relationship rn, but I do want to have sex but still have some level of trust respect and care for each other’s bodies. Thoughts or experiences you wouldn’t mind sharing?

omg i dont know if im seeing this really late but thank you for coming to me with this!

okay so to share my own first time experience... i had just gotten out of a really bad situationship. the situationship was my first time making out with someone and just genuinely having feelings for someone. first love if you will. but we had never had sex. the most we did was just his fingers being on my underwear. after this ended i just started going on dates with random people. realistically i knew like i wasnt ready for a relationship at the time but it was a good distraction for me to put myself out there. after like a month or so.. i went out with this one guy and i reallyyyy liked him. the first time we went out he fingered me in the theater (sorry guys!) and the second time was also similar. the third time i was over at his house and we had sex.

now i will admit that i was so incredibly lucky to have my first time with him. he was so understanding and so nice he didnt make it awkward at all i was just really comfortable through the entire thing. but i can't tell you that everyone youll meet will be the same way and ive definitely had some "bad" (not as good) experiences after that

and also to me sex or virginity has never really been a THING. so i never had a need for my first time to be special or to be with someone i had been dating for a while etc etc. i know for some people sex can be this very special thing but for me it just isnt. and from what i understand you also seem to feel the same way? (correct me if im wrong) so i just felt good to get the first one over with someone i felt comfortable with and it just opened up a whole new world for me. controversial but! like i love having sex. it has made me feel so much more comfortable in my body etc etc.

now my advice would be to (at least for your first time) dont have sex on the first hangout. ofc you can do stuff but just get to know them first and see if you feel comfortable with them. i would also advise that you tell them youre a virgin not in like a weird way but i promise it would make them be more understanding. also definitely discuss what you like (sexually) bc it can get real awkward if you realize your preferences dont align at all.

just overall be open with them. for your first time (and even in the future if you wish) let them know that you wont have sex in the first hangout (and their reactions to these kind of boundaries or their reactions to your preferences can be very telling of their character) and use the first hangout to get to know them to see if youd be comfortable having sex.

and also!! (sorry this is a very long response) awkward things will happen during sex but just laugh through them and i promise it will be fine. i promise you wont be the only one who's embarrassed by sth the other person will have things that they're embarrassed about too. its natural dont stress about it.

i feel like this was a lot of blabbing but i hope it makes sense to you and if you have ANY other questions feel free to come back. i promise i would never judge

[squeet-smooch]

I'm really sorry for the message i sent yesterday. It was uncalled for, and not okay for me to send to you.

My immediate response to seeing your reply was "oh, no! Mitten sent that, no! That was bad of her, i don't know why she thought she needed to say that. Even in her distress and confusion she acknowledged that you would be triggered and sent it thinking it would be okay, because you 'cared more about our wellbeing than your triggers'." That's not at all how it works. That is a pretty awful way to try to excuse myself, and me apologizing repeatedly doesn't fix it, or the fact that we do this often. But i need to be sure my message comes across.

It shouldn't have been sent, and i should be able to recognize what's okay to come to you with, but i don't. I cannot tell what's okay to share. I don't know how to approach either of you or anyone else anyway, and it's simply worsened by my overall nature. I believe everything that makes me, Me, is one of your major triggers. My male identity, my transition, my inner and past relationships, and my personal use of drugs. Regardless of why i use them, which is entirely to soothe trauma and body issues, it's not okay to mention it to you. I've tried really really hard to suppress it, a lot of things about myself, and i still break that a lot. I still do things and say things that i know are unacceptable and i do apologize for acting careless. Despite proof, i do care. I care so much that i don't approach with anything anymore.

In fact it's why I've been so distant. I miss you, so so much, but I'm tired of hurting you, and you're busy with yourself and your other partners. Which is fine, and i should be better and more understanding about it.

The fact that i have felt so lonely lately is entirely my fault, and i never expect anything from you. Ever. I never need you to give more than you have, and you haven't had anything much for me except my needs(food, very good food im so grateful for. A wonderful beautiful home, which I cannot praise and express enough gratitude over. Other related things). I do not want you to feel like i demand anything from you, ever. But i am lonely. And i do miss you, but that's also in part why i pulled away. It was too much, i craved too much. And I'm so sorry for the times I've hurt you in the month I've been here. I've had plenty of time to do it repeatedly, nothing like the individual weeks i spent up here. The one night i spent that one time (because I'm an idiot. Im still sorry for that.) The amount that I've triggered you heavily outweighs any positive experiences we've had together and i cannot express how sorry i am. I am not supposed to be that for you. It isn't okay.

I need to be better but I'm just not. I do not know how to solve it. I cannot look you in the face, i haven't been able to for a while now. Everything hurts, and i do not need you to feel guilt for any of it. I just want closure, clarification i suppose. I want to propose solutions. Maybe i stay sleeping on the couch, so you don't accidentally touch me while i cuddle your husband. So you don't have to be afraid of me, or hurt anymore. Or see me, infesting your sacred spaces. I can be assigned more chores, and i can take better care of them while you and him do the actual work, instead of always being asleep when you get home. I can get rid of more of my things, so you're less reminded of how invasive my presence has been.

There is never a good time for any of this, and i don't know what to do or think anymore. I'm sorry the way i am is so hard for you, and im sorry you decided to choose me before you seemed to realize how bad i actually was. How triggering and upsetting my way of life and existence genuinely always seems to be for you.

This is not me seeking sympathy, it is a massive apology and an urge to just. Let me know how i can alleviate it before things get so much worse. I don't want to see you feel bad, especially about any of this. I cannot keep pulling you down. You fight so hard just to stay standing and breathing to no rest. You deserve so much better.

I'm not improving, and it could be my fault and i don't look like it, but im fighting to get better. I want to fight for you, but if it would be better, i can stay further away.