#ITS OKAY I CAN SAY THE F SLUR GUYS ITS COOL

[bull-shit-suji]

actually i cannot fathom being a new/casual/anime only black butler fan and coming on this website for the resurgence only to find everyone rageposting about ciel not saying fag

[tr0ubl3d-tr4n53nd3r]

i dont really know much about american girl dolls but i think theyre really cool! do you think you could tell me about your favorite one?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! YES YES YESSSSSSS! IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS AGHHHHHHHHH OMG OMG OMG.

Okay um... I didn't just do that. Fr fr. No I'm cool.

Okay... who do I infodump about? I read Caroline Abbott, cécile Ray, and Marie Grace Gardener's books growing up, but I own Kit and Maryellen.

I think imma go with Kit Kittridge, from 1930's Cincinnati, Ohio

OKAY SO. I NEVER READ ANY BOOKS PAST MEET SO I REALLY DONT KNOW TOO MUCH BUT I WATCHED THE MOVIE SO...

her meet outfit looks like this

"Shes (not) a faking lying blone schemer and her name isn't Kit... ITS MARGRET"

Had to throw a total drama reference in there, but it's true. Her real name is Margaret Mildred Kittridge. She was named after her mom and like... grandma, but like she wasn't her grandma? Idk it's hard to explain. I know what I mean so I guess it works. She got the name Kit because when she was a kid her father sang this song that went like "pack up your troubles in your old kit bag" and kit loved it so she would always say "dad! Sing the Kit song!" And the name stuck. (The song is a bop and I obsessively listened to it last year when I first heard the actual song.)

Idk if you want to listen to it it's there. I did research on it but that's a whole separate thing. Also yes it does use the f slur. It was regarding cigarettes (damn British people)

Okay... storyline (I remember the movie more. I only read the beforever book too so my memory of the actual story is a bit tainted. And because the beforever books are honestly horrible because they cut out legitimately the entire story to make it shorter, I will be referring to the movie.)

So the movie starts out with kit going to her brother Charlie's place of work to turn in a newspaper she wrote herself (he works at the Cincinnati News thingy. Idk I don't read the news.) In the book he is living at home about to leave for uni, and he doesn't go because they are too poor. So this guy is like "hey this is a giant company... we can't take ur newspaper sorry" and she goes home.

When she gets there there are two hobos who need a job for some food and she brings them to her mom so they can get some. Tbh I can't remember their names. One is this like... tall white boy, and the other is a child. He isn't white. He's prolly black but idk. The mom, Margret is hanging out with Judgy socialites and she is nice but the others are not. One of them makes a comment about how it's disgusting how they don't have a place to live (keep her in mind she is important later.) Then her and three other girls go into a treehouse together and take an oath of allegiance to the treehouse club. It's basically about women who did great things like Amelia Earheart. In it is her best friend Ruth-Ann "Ruthie" Smithens, and two other girls. They are sisters and live across the street.

Unfortunately in the middle of the oath the look outside to see the girls mom weeping outside the house, and all of their furniture being moved out. A foreclosure sign was being nailed into their front yard. Both girls ledt to never be seen again. Seriously where did they go? Anyway this didn't really affect our unvothered queen Kit and she decided to write a newspaper article about it for her father to read. (In the book he came home in a car, in the movie he walked. Idk why tbh.) It deeply bothered him and he had a sad demeaner

Nothing really happens for a bit if I remember right, until she goes on a little trip to the store or something and she sees a little dog with a sign that says "name is grace. Can't feed anymore" and she begs her mom to get her. She reluctantly says yes and suddenly a man runs by with a stolen wallet. He has a parrot tattoo. Remember that for later too.

That night her snobby rich uncle came over and raged over the fact they adopted a dog and nothing else really happened. He has more importance in the books I think.

Anyway. Remember that socialite from earlier? Yeah. She becomes homeless. Karma. Margret, who felt they were doing fine invited her to live with them, and she did. She moved in with her son whatsitsface or whatever. Idk he's not #girlpower or whatever. He is girlypop. Defo fr. Anyway in the book he's like "frail" or whatever and kit hates him for it. So not slay kit. Be nice to him (I just rememyhis name was Stirling.)

Anyway her dad comes home from work and is concerned about the fact they moved in and then kit goes to school. There is a bully and Stirling essentially tar and feathered him (kits school outfit ft. Maryellen because this is the only one I took btw)

Anyway so basically they're taking a field trip to the food kitchen to help the less fortunate and kit sees her dad and throws a hissy fit saying she hates her dad or something. In the book he just sold the car and that's what set her off. He went to Chicago or something and she got so mad and typed on the typewriter about how stupid Chicago was and money and how she hated her dad, then scrapped the letter and wrote about how cool the boarders she took in were. Yes boarders. The ones in the book seem lame. It was like a few teachers and a doctor or something idk. In the movie tho, a dancer, a librarian, a magician, then of course Stirling and his mom.

Nothing really happens for a while excepy that those two hobos have been working for them still and Margret gives them the dad's old boots. That's important to know.

Kit goes to the hobo camp with Stirling, Ruthie, and the two hobos and she writes a newspaper about it. She tries to get this one published but fails again.

Then she goes home and her family and all boarders put their values into a box and hid it in the house because Ruthies dad (a rich banker who keeps none of his money in the bank) was robbed. Actually it was robbed by some guy... no someone they know. They had kits dad's shoes. YES JT WAS THE HOBOS. but they wouldn't do that... would they? No... because the culprit has a parrot tattoo and neither had that!!!

So basically they were framed... but by who?

No time to figure it out because the kitties were robbed and their house was foreclosed. They had only a little bit to move out, but until that one of the boarders' cousins moved in. Kit saw that he had a tattoo and investigated his room while they were gone. She found EVERYTHING that was stolen, and chased them down. They found her Ruthie and Stirling and they got into this epic chase. Because they could read hobo they figured out which way the camp was and switched the sign backwards. The hobos knew them, and liked them, so they hid them when the people came (the magician, his cousin, and the librarian oddly enough) and they threatened the hobos. Basically the popo caught them or something and the other hobos were released (oh yeah I forgot to mention the short one ended up being trans omg)

Kit won her family a cash reward because it turned out they were like major criminals, then she wrote a newspaper article, got it published, and got like 3k in modern day money from it. They were saved.

Thanksgiving day came up and it was pretty normal, except now there were boarders. Then the door rings. Kit jumps up thinking it's her dad and it ends up being every single hobo from camp bringing a different kind of hobo food. Also the trans one learned to read thats like a whole sub plot I forgot to mention. She reads in front of the whole group of people and everyone is happy, except for kit. She misses dad. All of a sudden in the isolating quiet of such a loud place she looks outside and sees a figure. HER DAD.

Anyway that was basically it tbh but here are some other outfits I have

[solarwaters]

gay representation doesn't matter. First of all, I'm a homosexual, but I'm not a part of any community. You guys celebrate pride but what pride is there in liking the same gender. There is no pride in it and there is no point of celebrating something that isnt special. Yes, Im very sorry to tell you but you arent special for liking a girl when you are a girl. You're just being a human being. You cant change the norm and literature, the natural thing and the norm in literature, history and religion is heterosexuality. Obviously when you see shows and books they will usually only have straight people. You dont seriously expect homosexuality to be put into historical books? I respect transgender people that are truly trans. The ones that always felt somehting wrong with their gender, the ones that cried and felt dismorphic. I dont respect the "transgender" people who only became trans after they heard of LGBTQ community, they just decided they are trans because its "cool." Causes problems for your family. It means you have been taken over by the 2020 effect. Lesbians made a "lesbian apocalypse." okay, cool. and then bisexual people decided they wanted one too. Lesbians got mad at them for taking away "lesbian rep." what kind of bs is that? What do you need representation for? Liking a woman? There are queer youths who actually struggle. Their parents are homophobic and they wont accept their child. THEY need representation. More than half of you "lesbians" dont have that struggle. Your parents dont care, you tell everyone you're gay. You dont need any representation. I hate that REAL queers and trans people that have struggles are being over shadowed by people who just use homosexuality as a fun thing. People have called me slurs sometimes, people have been homophobic to me, but I'm not the one who truly struggles. People are mean to others all the time and this just falls into the category. Someone calling you the F-slur (dont want to get banned lmao) is the same thing as someone so sensitive person an idiot if they get offended by it. But it doesnt matter if you say asian, black, gay slurs no matter what race etc. you are If you only use it in a term that isnt specified to anyone who cares. like in the context of eminem saying f-slur in 'rap god.' He couldve said the n-slur since he wasnt targeting someone for being black. it doesnt matter then. Also it seems that yall have a little bias. like eminem can say the f-slur but your straight friend cant cause eminem "earned it." see how biased you are? you care about slurs and representation but you dont care about wars, gossip and back biting. freaks.

[aficwhore]

Truth Is

Chapter 1: A Night Many Months Ago

Frankie "Catfish" Morales x F!reader

Summary: When reuniting for the mission in Colombia, Frankie and the reader (nicknamed "Chipmunk"), bicker due to their rocky past. After some angry exchanges, a few truths come out, changing both of their perspectives. Will the relationship be mended? Or once this is over, will they go back to the way things were before?

Word Count: 3K

Warnings: explicit language, blood, violence, guns/weapons, lots of angst and emotions, infidelity, talk of sex and sexual encounters, drinking, mentions of drugs, talk of death, and talk of mental health(PTSD, depression).

A/N: This was inspired by the song "Truth Is" by Sabrina Claudio. I want to make this a series (my first series ever), but it's still being decided, so please let me know if you want this to be continued! And I am still taking requests and prompts! Thanks Lovelies <3

"Cmon, please Chip, we can't do this without you." Santiago begged, his hands clasped together in front of him to show his desperation as he stood before me in my small apartment kitchen. I sighed, glancing around our surroundings. He had come to ask about joining one last escapade, one last job and we'd all be set for the rest of our lives.

Finally breaking the silence and meeting his weary gaze, "Who all have you rounded up? If Will or Benny said no, there's no way I'm doing it without them." I took another deep breath, turning to continue the dishes I had been doing when Pope showed up.

Santi's face began to light up, his stance growing slightly as he grinned, "Great! They both wanted in, so did Tom." Seeming relieved he leaned against the counter next to the sink and crossed his arms.

"And F-Fish?" I hesitated, pausing the scrubbing on the porcelain dish in my hand. It felt like the air in my lungs no longer existed. My heart began to pound it's way up my throat and into my ears.

His head dipped down, feeling the concern laced in my voice. Clearing his voice, he quietly explained "Haven't asked him yet, he was last on my list."

I silently placed the last dish onto the rack near the sink and wiped my wet hands on my jeans, looking down and watching the wet marks gradually making themselves known. No longer forcing myself to make eye contact, I nodded at the ground.

"Look, querida, if you two just talked I'm sure it would work out." He pushed himself off the counter and stepped towards me, reaching a hand out and gently rubbing my shoulder to console me. "But don't let this change your mind, we really do need you."

"When are you going to mention it to him?" I breathed out, wanting to keep any and all emotions at bay. His hand on my arm squeezed, as if he was trying to give me some courage.

"Tonight, at Benny's fight, I thought his spirits would be up enough to persuade him." He chuckled lightly, knowing his plan was to take a little bit of advantage of Frankie's mood.

I laughed softly, "Definitely sounds like a Santi move if you ask me."

He smirked and shook his head "I know, shame on me." As he dropped his hand back to his side he quirked, "You should come tonight, we can go out for drinks after the fight, relax a little before we leave tomorrow."

It took me a second to register what he said, but when I did I burst out "wait what?! Tomorrow? Santi, why didn't you tell me that? You forgot the biggest detail!"

He cowered down slightly, rubbing the back of his neck "Because I knew you'd yell at me, it was worth a shot putting off the anger a little longer." He smiled coyly.

Rolling my eyes I couldn't help but forgive his dumb smile. "Well it starts soon, why don't I get my things real quick and we can head to the arena together?"

His smile widened, "Of course!" I grabbed my purse and keys, making sure to turn off the lights and lock the door behind me. As we made our way down the elevator and out to his car, Santi told me a few details about the missions and the plan. But once we got into his rinky dink ford truck, I turned to him.

"About Frankie, I'm sure one of the boys told you, but just in case; his license was revoked." Santi's face contorted with confusion.

"What? How? Did he crash or hurt somebody?" He questioned quickly.

After taking a breath of courage I spoke, "No Pope. He-He was caught with coke."

Santi stayed quiet, turning the engine on. "I don't get it" A sad expression plastered on his face.

With a furrow in my brow I spoke again, "What don't you get? He was doing drugs, hardcore ones at that". I began to ramble more, "For what reason, I'm not sure, maybe the PTSD and depression. Maybe he felt he had no one to go to-"

"Stop. I know." He cut me off while finally shifting the gear into drive and moving up forward. "You can't blame anyone for this. All we can do is move on and help him. He's our friend, okay? But I know he's still the same Fish, just a little turned around."

"I know, okay. I can't help it. From what the boys told me, he seems to be a lot better." I added, stirring in my seat. "Anyways, it's been awhile since all of us have been back together. It's exciting."

Santi snickered, "But didn't you all hang out while I've been out of the U.S.?"

Seeing that we're close to the arena's parking garage I explained, "I mean, yea, but only me, Ironhead, Benny and Fish. I haven't talked to Redfly in months, we all had a fallout with him. Especially me."

"Tom didn't say anything when I talked to him, Do you wanna fill me in?" He asked with a quirked eyebrow.

Huffing, I turn to face him, telling him the events of that night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~flashback~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The four of us, the Millers, Frankie and I sat on my couch, watching TV and talking, when we hear a bang at the door. I got up to open it and find Tom slumped on the doorway. He looked rough and smelled like he had been drinking the past several days. "Woah, Tom, you're really drunk, and you drove here?"

He snapped, beginning to yell, "Who are you to judge me? Huh? My wife left me, this is how I cope." He angrily pushed his way past me and tumbled into the living room. He was greeted with the boys standing around him with concerned faces.

"What the hell were you thinking? You know how dangerous that is? You know you could've called and we would've been there for you!" I raised my voice back, causing Tom to swing around to face me.

He laughed darkly, "Oh shut up 'Miss Perfect,' just like you did for Fish? When he was nose deep in coke? Or are you too self obsessed? Or do you just have favorites!"

"Hey man, that's not cool." Will interrupted and tried to get a handle on Tom. Frankie lowered his head in embarrassment. Will reached forward and placed a hand on his back, but things escalated more.

"Oh okay, yea protect the whore, we all know she's there for you guys more than just talking. I wouldn't doubt it if you all fucked her too. But me? Nah, you leave me out of everything." Tom howled, yanking away from Will and slurring his words and no longer making sense.

Anger becoming more prominent, I spoke, "Seriously?! Whore?! How is it my fault that you push us away and don't let us help? We include you in everything, but you have your head so far stuck up your ass you never show up!" I've come face to face with him, my hot breath and voice blowing into his face above me. "And another thing, I'm not a whore, you asshole, I'm with Frankie!"

He leaned closer to me, his breath reeking of alcohol, "Just him? Does he know where you're at everyday Monday and Wednesday at 1?! I doubt it!"

Frankie speaks up, "What? What is he talking about?" A devilish smirk makes its way to Tom's face.

"Nothing, I swear it's nothing." I try to explain, making eye contact with my partially hurt lover.

"Tell him, tell him you've been seeing a 'Dr. Philips.' Go on, do it." He rubs it in.

Looking behind Tom, I saw Frankie looking like his world had just shattered. "You've been seeing someone?!"

Panicking, I speak, "Yes, but it's not what you think, I promise!"

"Then what is it?" Tom adds, stumbling back a foot and crossing his arms contently at the damage he just caused.

Benny spoke up, knowing the truth about who I was "seeing." "You need to leave man, you have no right to say shit like that. You don't know the real situation"

Tom burst, yelling "I want her to admit it! I want her to admit that she isn't the perfect bitch she makes herself out to be!"

"Fuck you! Get the hell out of my house!" I scream, tears slightly welling in my eyes. "Frankie-" I turn to him, but to find him grabbing his things. "Baby please, let me explain."

"Explain what? You've been cheating on me?" his voice is loud, and cracks slightly.

A tear breaks its way down my cheek, "I haven't, Frankie, please believe me." I grab his hand, trying to stall his movements, but he pulls away.

"You just admitted it!" He frowns and yanks his hand away and heads for the door.

"That's right Fishie boy! Leave her, she's no good anyway!" Tom squawks as Benny grabs a hold of him and shoves him to the door, Will right behind to help.

"You bastard!" I lunged forward and swung my hand, landing right on the side of his face with a loud crack. Frankie spun around, startled at my actions.

The action only fueled Tom's anger because he ripped away from Benny's grip and grabbed me. I didn't back down and started to shove him and swing my arms, hitting him in the face and chest as he fought back.

But just as quickly as the fight started, it ended. Frankie tore me off of Tom, pinning me to his chest and stopping my brutal hits. Will and Benny wrested Tom into submission and dragged him out of the front door as he yelled slurs at me, and dumped him outside with a battered face.

While the brothers were dealing with a drunk Redfly, Frankie scolded and verbally fought with me.

"Just tell me! Who is Dr. Philips!" He questioned, slightly shaking me by the shoulders.

With many emotions running through my head, I couldn't process what was going on. "I-I can't, Frankie, I can't even admit it to myself." Tears streaming down my face I brought my hands up to the sides of his face. "But you have to believe me, por favor (please)."

Francisco looked like he was fighting an emotional battle in his mind. He finally spoke, "Either you tell me, or I leave, I can't do this, not if you keep things from me."

Feeling my heart break, I whispered "Please, mi amor (my love), don't make me. I'm not strong enough." My eyes now running like an open faucet and my hands tightly pressed to his cheeks.

He blinks away tears, reaching his hands up to grab mine and pull them away from his face, "Then I have to go." He drops my hands and turns to leave.

"Por favor no me dejes! (Please don't leave me)" I call after him, watching as he heads out of the door and into the night, leaving me alone. I drop to the floor, tears blurring my vision and all that can be heard are my sobs.

After what feels like hours, Will and Benny return, picking me up off the floor and taking me to my bed. They lay me down, attempting to help my emotional breakdown. They pick up whatever mess that was left after the event of that night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~end flashback~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"And after that night, Tom was no longer invited anywhere with us. Frankie distanced himself and refused to talk to me. But Will and Benny did their best to be there for me in any way they could. They did the same for Frankie. But as for Tom, they casted him out, because he changed, badly." I finished covering the story of that night, fighting the tears that threatened to spill. "And the Dr. Philips I was seeing, was my therapist. I didn't want anyone to know I wasn't okay mentally. I was embarrassed and part of me didn't want to admit I needed help. The lives we chose aren't easy."

Santi parked, and seemed shocked, "I'm sorry love, I knew you split with Fish, but didn't know any details or about Tom." He reached over and patted my thigh sympathetically. "I really am sorry that you went through all of that because Tom was an asshole. You really don't have to do this-"

"No I want to, I'm in a better place, so is everyone else." I smiled shyly, wanting to lift the spirits. "So what do you say? Let's go wrangle up our boys and get rich?"

Pope smiled brightly, "Hell yes!" We both got out of the car, and headed to the back of the arena and knocked, hoping Will was there to open it like he told Santi he would. Much to our luck, the door swung open to reveal a tall, smiling, blonde Miller brother.

"Brother!" Santi chuckled as he pulled the eldest Miller into a hug, clapping each other on the back. They pulled away as Pope headed inside to find the others.

"Hey pretty girl, long time no see." Will joked, hugging me tightly.

I scoffed, "Will, you were just at my house last night." We both laughed and he led me into a rank smelling locker room, which I assumed was for Benny to get ready. As we rounded the corner, I saw Benny and Tom chatting on one of the benches between the lockers.

"Chipmunk!" Benny roared as he ran over, picked me up and spun me around. "I missed you! I'm so glad you could make it!" He sat me back down and stepped back to sit on the bench again.

"Of course, I wouldn't miss you getting your ass beat for the world!" I giggled as I winked at him, showing the younger of us a bit of love.

He shook his head with a grin. As my eyes left him, they met with the eyes of Tom. He seemed to have a look of regret, trying to give me a sad smile.

I walked over to him, reaching my hand in a fist forward, lightly tapping his shoulder, "Hey fly, how you been?"

A small wave of relief washed over him as he responded "I'm good Chip, how are you? And look I'm really sorry, I wasn't in a good place and I regret-"

"Its okay Tom, really, it is. I'm just glad you're better. It's water under the bridge." I sit next to him and pat his back, showing that all, or at least most, is forgiven.

He nods slowly, "Thank you, it means a lot that you're here."

"Oh cmon you have to admit it, you couldn't do it without me, the best there is." I pretend to act over confident and burst into laughter. And Tom joins in.

As Tom and I begin to catch up, talking about what we've missed these past several months, I overhear a conversation.

"Hermano (brother)! How are you?" Santi greets Frankie, I assume, he was the last of us, who wasn't already here. When I realize that it is him, my heart begins to race. My skin starts to burn and get hot, my palms becoming sweaty.

"Pope! Benny! Ironhead! What is this, a reunion?" Frankie's voice echoes as they come closer. As the three round the corner, "All we need is Redfly and Chip-" Frankie stops as we become revealed to him. Tom gets up immediately and struts over to give Fish a hug. Frankie's face lights up with glee and hugs him back. When they step away from each other, I wearily stand up and all he does is give an awkward smile and nods in my direction.

Benny attempts to whisper to Santi, "Ouch, that's cold." And Santi jabs him in the stomach with his elbow, causing him to double over and make a "hmf" sound.

Being slightly hurt, I break the uneasy tension by opening an invitation, "Alright well I'm gonna go get a beer and find us some good seats, it's close to showtime!" Faking a smile I continue, "Who's coming?"

"Me, I can't be in here with this doofus anymore." Will chuckle as he ruffles Ben's hair and follows right behind me.

When we make it to the concession stand and order beers, Will taps my arm, "How are you feeling?"

With a sigh, "Honestly I expected that, but it hurt more when it actually happened. But what can I say." I grab out drinks from the concession worker and thank her and turn on my heels to find a seat. "I love him, and if that means waiting to mend things, it worth it, even if it means waiting forever."

Will offers a sympathetic grin. "It'll work, just watch. Oh! Over there! Perfect seats!" He points as his attention was caught by an opening near the rink. He pursues it as I follow behind.

While we sit, we joke around, waiting for the rest of the gang to come sit and watch Benny get thrown around. Finally the last three show up and sit with us, Tom sat on Will's right side, me on his other side, Santi on my left, but when Frankie walks up, he bends down and whispers to Santi, causing him to scoot further away from me and leaving room for Frankie to slot himself between us. Which took me by surprise. Once he was seated, he glanced over to me and gave me a genuine smile.

We don't say a word as the lights begin to dim and the announcer's voice breaks through the speaks, introducing our dear Benny and his opponent.

Our small group starts to cheer and scream Benny's name, to show him support. As he enters the rink, he searches for us, and when he finds us, he smiles big.

In the midst of all the commotion, Frankie leans over and whispers to me, "I missed you, cariño (sweetheart)."

My face whips around to meet a very close Fish, who is smiling. "I missed you too." I give a small smile and lean to my side to shoulder bump him, as he places a hand on my knee.

[imaginedxlan]

Beta (Fred Weasley)

a/n: I had a whole frat boy series for the dolan twins and I cannot stay away, frat boys have my heart, both in real life and in imagines. Everything I do in life is for the chads and brads of the world.

beta theta pi has always been a fraternity you were intimidated by. they’re title as top house has always made you feel too insecure to go anywhere near them, but when your best friend starts dating a beta boy you’re forced to face the top house at their annual spring darty (day party for those who are unware)

disclaimer: hogwarts is basically just one greek row shawties. beta boys are hot, so expect the hottest of hogwarts to be in it.

y/f/n = your friend’s name

warnings: alcohol, sexual allusions, fratboy!fred

_____________

As the weather gets warmer on campus, that can only mean one thing: Darty Season. After suffering through the brutal winter, greek row opens up its lawns and lake front docks to the brothers and sisters of the greek system. Being the undisputed top house, Beta Theta Pi’s spring darties are always the most coveted invite. With their massive backyard and gallons of supplied liquor, theres not a soul on greek row who wouldn’t want a taste of the party of a lifetime. Well, except one.

You never bought into the beta supremacy like all of your sorority sister have. To be quite honest, you’re slightly terrified of the brick faced mansion only a block away from you. You’ve never heard anything that bad about the brothers, just that their looks and entitlement make any girl an easy target for heartache. 

Before you came to college, you had a longterm boyfriend who you agreed to stay with as long as possible, even over long distance. However, the summer before you kissed your hometown goodbye, he decided being tied down wasn’t for him and slept with a girl he met at orientation. He was only away for three days. So you kept your distance from beta and all the boys who had the capacity to make you feel as shattered as you did the July morning your ex boyfriend returned from his trip with a hickey on his neck. 

Your distance suddenly became harder to keep when your best friend, your roommate and sorority sister, shacked up with some beta boy she met in her communications class. You warned her as much as you could, her boyfriend being the blonde rich boy every girl whispered about, but Draco proved you wrong the minute he started begging her to be his girlfriend. 

So here you are, next to y/f/n who’s tucked under Draco’s arm as you walk toward the house thats bursting with sound and alcohol. He insisted on walking the two of you to the house, assuring none of the pledges would look at ‘his girl’ the wrong way. You’ve passed the beta house plenty of times over your past two years at school, never once have you gotten over the sinking feeling in your stomach to ever go in.

“Y/n, relax, we’re not a bunch of cavemen,” Draco speaks up once he notices how you’re holding your arms across your chest. Y/f/n told him about why you were so apprehensive about him, about his fraternity, he promised he’d be with you both the whole day. “Lets get something to drink, loosen you both up a bit.”

He takes you both to where there are pledges handing out cans of seltzers and beer and snags you both white claws before they’re gone. He sticks to his word and hangs around the two of you no matter how many times his brothers come up to him and try to convince him to join in on a game of beer di or chicken in the lake. You start feeling bad for him, y/f/n too, you know you’re holding them back in a sense. You tell both of them you’re okay if they want to hang out with his friends once you spot a couple of other girls in your sorority. 

The minutes feel like hours, while you’re having a fine time with your girl friends, you wish this party would end more than anything. Before you know it, y/f/n is screaming your name from the dock, waving you over. Once you get there she’s dragging you toward the lake, urging you to take off your top and shorts so you could play chicken with her and Draco. You immediately agree until you’re hit with the realization that you needed a fourth in order to play chicken.

Enter Fred Weasley. You’ve seen the twins around campus, everyone talks about them. Six foot something with fiery red hair and gorgeous bodies. You’ve seen their bare torsos on more saturday night snapchat stories than you can count. His baby blue swim hang low on his hips, putting his freckle littered chest and abdomen completely on display.

“Fred,” He says casually, reaching out his hand. “Most people call me Weasley, or Freddie.”

Your breath hitches, his hands are massive. You bite your lip to take his hand in yours, you’ve never actually shaken hands with any guy you’ve met at this school. You reply without meeting his burning gaze, “Y/n.”

All he says is a quiet ‘I know’ almost like you weren’t meant to hear it, before y/f/n is calling from Draco’s shoulders for the two of you to hurry up.  Your stomach turns at the thought of being on top of his shoulders. This won’t be a fair fight, Draco isn’t even six foot and Fred is a giant.

You edge closer to the stairs of the dock, Fred just jumps right in. The water is cold, unsurprisingly. Everything in you is praying that the chill of the water cools the flush that is running across your cheeks. Fred dunks his whole body under the water and feels for your ankles to pull you over his shoulders. The grips his huge hands have on the tops of your thighs makes butterflies erupt in your stomach.

“You ready?” He asks once you’re steady on his shoulders. You can’t see his face but you wish you could. His messy, wet hair splayed across his forehead must be a sight to for sore eyes. “I’ve got you tight up there, just don’t tip.”

You tell him you’re good before he makes his way over the Draco with y/f/n on top of him. She’s shorter than you, at least half a foot which makes it easier for you to put your hands on her shoulders to gain control. You’re both laughing as you try and push the other over. You’re almost having too much fun to forget that you’re in a bikini on top of arguable the best looking boy in your year in front of a backyard of hundreds of drunk students. Usually you would be more insecure about your current situation, but you can’t bring yourself to care. Eventually y/f/n loses her balance and topples over, bringing Draco down with her. Fred shouts out in celebration once they emerge front the lake. In a swift motion, his slippery hands pull your body off his shoulders to stand in front of him. His hand absentmindedly goes to your waist as he continues to shout at Draco for ‘being such a loser.’

His smile is radiant. It makes you smile with him and laugh with y/f/n as she rings out her hair. For the rest of the day, Fred barely leaves your side, his hand continues to make its way to hold you close to him by your waist. The drunker you get the less you notice it, you actually sort of like it. Any time a drinking game arises, he immediately pulls you along with him. Beer pong, flip cup, rage cage, he’s always planted next to you as you drink the day away. You meet his twin and his other friends who give him a knowing look when they see you practically joined at the hip.

His friend Blaise can’t help but smile your way, a shit eating grin gracing his features. He whispers something in Fred’s ear which makes him laugh a little. His laugh is perfect, you wouldn’t need even alcohol, you could get completely drunk off his features. You like the beta boys, you can’t understand why you were ever scared of them in the first place. George and Oliver talk to you as if you’ve know them for years, chatting about your mutual friends and your hometowns. You feel comfortable with them, it makes you happy.

“S’getting late,” He says, he isn’t slurring but his wobbly stance gives off that he’s clearly drunk. As the sky turns all shades of orange, you realize just how much time you’ve spent with him. You haven’t seen Draco or y/f/n in a while, meaning their probably up in his room. “I’ll walk you home.”

“You don’t have to do that,” You protest, shaking your head but he stops you. His hand rests on the side of your neck, making you choke on your breath as you meet his eyes. His lazy smile makes your heart race.

“You’re very pretty, you know that?” He drunkenly stumbles over his words. Your heart is hammering against your rig cage, you feel weirdly sober now that he’s staring into your eyes. “Had class with you last semester, couldn’t keep my eyes off you.”

You continue to shake your head, wondering if this day had just been a wild dream and you were going to wake up in yours and y/f/n’s shared room in your pajamas any second. But his hand travelling up your side pulls you into the realization that this is reality.

“Can I kiss you?”

You don’t reply, you simply lift onto your toes to meet his lips with yours. If you were completely sober, you would never be so bold but everything in you was screaming for his touch. His lips are warm, a completely one-eighty from his cold hands against your skin. The party goes on around you but you feel like time stands still in Fred’s embrace. He pulls away from you for just a second to catch his breathe before leaning down to catch you in another kiss. His hand moves from your waist to the small of your back as the kiss deepens.

You eventually pull from each other, breathless, once you feel beer from various cups splash against your skin as a group of boys huddle next to you to sing out whatever song is playing at the moment. You both laugh as you lean your head against his bare chest, drinking in this moment.

“Come on then,” He says, taking your hand in his. Your head is spinning, not from the alcohol, but from the complete state of bliss you’re in. “I’ll grab you a shirt and get you home.”

You walk back to your house, hand in hand with his tee shirt hanging just above your knees, talking about everything under the sun. While the walk itself is short, the moment seems to last forever. When you each your front lawn, he tugs on your hand to pull you into him once more, feeling his soft lips meet yours. Your heart flutters as you walk toward your front door, turning back to him and he smiles at you, making your heart melt.

“Goodnight, Freddie.” You call out from the opened door. He gives you a small waves and tells you he’ll see you soon. Once the door is shut you close your eyes and can’t help but smile. You squeal, causing the girls in your living room to look out the window and see Fred Weasley with his fingers on his lips and a wide smile. They pull you onto the couch and beg you to tell them all about your day in the background of beta theta pi. You can’t contain your grin as you relay today’s events to your sorority sisters.

Maybe beta isn’t so scary after all.

[cloudytamaki]

so, this is how the summer ends • k.denki

⤷ genre: fluff, angst - quirkless au, everyone’s 21, set in LA

⤷ warnings: mentions of sex/implied sex, mildly suggestive, alcohol

⤷ summary: a casual drunk hookup between two young strangers became something ... more than sex.

a warm breeze blows a curl of hair from your forehead and you exhale, corners of your lips lifting into a small smile. it’s almost the end of august; the leaves on the trees are becoming orange and the warm summer winds are cooling down.

the end of an era, and the start of another.

you subconsciously turn your head and look beside you, almost wishing for someone to be there. he isn’t – the cushion of the porch swing is empty. the small smile slips off your lips and your brows furrow; you close your eyes as if the sight’s painful, turning back to watch the trees and sun.

you can’t help the tingling heat that begins to spread through your nose; the promise of tears yet to come.

your mind drifts back to the start of your summer – june 14.

the neighborhood nightclub music is loud, likely booming throughout the area and annoying the neighbors.

but the old neighbors don’t seem to matter as much as the glass of alcohol in your hands and the prickling heat in the back of your skull. there’s a lazy smile sitting upon your lips as you survey the club, taking sips of your drink every few seconds.

ah — there’s your friend, out twerking on the dance floor, getting cheered on by men who are whooping and waving their fists in the air. you cross your legs, the thought of shaking your ass in front of many men seeming unappealing to you.

“hey! can i get another, please?” a golden blonde stranger is suddenly beside you, left arm on the bar counter, a wide grin on his face as sweat runs down his temples.

the bartender sighs, slides him a filled cup, then goes back to cleaning the other glasses with a towel. the energetic looking guy plops down onto a stool beside you, nice white teeth catching the light.

“hey, why aren’t you out dancing?”

your lips flatten into a thin line as you turn to him, “don’t feel like it. it’s nice sitting over here and watching, though.”

“i guess.” he furrows his eyebrows in thought, lips scrunching a bit, “you come here alone?”

“nope.” you sigh, taking a bigger sip this time. “i had a friend come with me, we’d had a few drinks before she’d gone off to the dance floor.” you tiredly gesture towards the crowd, “so yeah. what about you, where’s your friends? you look like you should be over there partying rather than talking to me.”

“they’re all over the club.” he scratches the back of his neck sheepishly, “some of them didn’t come, others’re just.. around.”

“that makes sense.” another sip and you turn away from the blinding lights, “parties are fun for me, just not when i’m the center of attention.”

“i get that,” he chuckles, takes a sip of his own drink, “i know a guy exactly like that. 8:30 pm bedtime, 6:30 wake up.”

“are you serious? 8:30? i go to bed around 12.”

“yeah, i know right? he’s super strict on it too, we all make fun of him.”

“damn, that sounds fun.” you exhale before taking a bigger sip, the burn of the alcohol stinging a trail down your throat. “you have a name?”

he laughs at that, running a hand through his golden tufts, “denki kaminari, pleased to meet you, madam.” he jokingly places a kiss against your fingers and you let out a squeal of surprise, laughing as you pull your hands away from him.

“(y/n) (l/n), pleased to meet you too, denki kaminari.” you nod at him, drinking the last of your empty glass.

you both ask the bartender for more, and when you both stumble on your words in fear of interrupting each other, you decide to go against each other in a drinking challenge – five shot glasses filled with the second strongest liquor on the shelf.

you manage to down four glasses, determination the only thing keeping you going at this point; your cheeks are hot from the alcohol, brain fuzzy, surroundings beginning to blur every few seconds.

“y-you good?” denki doesn’t look all that good either. shit, he looks terrible – happy, but terrible nonetheless. five empty glasses are at his side and his golden eyes are focused on you.

“yeah, i’m fine.. round two?” you give him a challenging smile and he pouts, pushing out his lower lip as he asks the clearly tired bartender for more, once again.

you crack your knuckles and take a deep breath, picking up the first shot glass as you look at denki, nodding at the same time. you bring it to your lips and suck all the liquid down, almost feeling its burn in your spine when it goes down your throat.

another shot glass, then another – before you know it, you’re swaying on your feet like an idiot, brain spinning, muscles loose. you glance towards denki and you wonder why you’d let yourselves get so inebriated.

“damn, that was fun!” he’s slurring on his words and you bring a hand to your head, sighing.

“jesus christ, i need to sit down.” you both stagger towards a staircase, not caring about how idiotic you look while doing so.

you’re about to pop the dreaded question—how’re we getting home?—when he speaks instead, tilting his head back with a yawn-sigh.

“i’m horny.”

and that’s when you really notice something about him; his jawline is sharp and young, his lips pink and parted, his skin flushed from the drinks, his golden eyes piercing.

you find yourself saying something you’d never imagined would leave your lips, “i can help with that.”

“really? you?” he turns his head towards you and points to you almost accusingly.

you shrug, “i think it was the drinks, but yeah, me. don’t wanna pass up a good offer.”

he seems to think about it while you take a quick look at your phone. “11:48 pm – you stay horny or not, your choice.”

“okay.” denki does some jazz hands and you roll your eyes, “sure. i think there’s some upstairs rooms over here.” you both stand and turn, ascending up the stairs, deciding to walk into a decent looking room.

“so ...” you stand there awkwardly, surroundings spinning but you manage to look over to denki, who’s equally confused. “you said you were horny.”

“and you said you could fix that.” the both of you are standing there, looking at each other, not fully knowing what to do, so you decide to get the ball rolling.

walking over to him, you begin to plant kisses along his jaw and down his neck. he lets out a small whine when you pull away, but you’re feeling more confident when you look at him again.

“kiss me.”

you almost laugh at your confidence that night; you started off sitting alone with a cup of alcohol, not even planning to get drunk – where the fuck did that even come from?

a cooler breeze hits your skin this time, carrying the scent of nearby cooking. smells like some sort of pie, you guess, rubbing your hands over your thighs in remembrance of that drunken hookup. deciding to go inside, you slide off the porch swing, walking over to the back door, twisting the knob and heading inside.

the elevator comes surprisingly fast when you push the button; stepping in, you punch in the number five and wait as you’re lifted above all the other floors.

you take out your keys and step out of the elevator when it dings, walking down the hall to your door, inserting the keys and walking inside.

it’s cold, as expected.

sighing, you toss your keys onto the counter and open the cabinets, rooting around for some food. you come out with a packaged ramen cup; you open it and fill it up with water, then pop it into the microwave.

you lean against the stove as you wait; two minutes and the microwave beeps, you take out your hot food and grab a spoon, walking over to the kitchen table, switching on a light.

you eat alone, in silence.

“oh shit!” you practically throw yourself out of the twin-sized bed; your bare ass is on the cold floor and you’re frantically gathering as much of the sheet as possible, pulling it against your naked chest.

from the other side of the mattress, there’s a girlish scream and a head of golden blonde hair pops up, amber eyes wide with surprise and panic.

“who are you?” your hand comes up to your forehead to ease the pounding in the back of your head. “wait.” something clicks and some tension leaves your shoulders as you point at him, “aren’t you that kid from last night?”

“i’m 21, thank you very much.” he scoffs in disbelief, “how do you not remember me? you were literally moaning my—”

“okay!” you cut him off quickly, cheeks warming up in embarrassment as your brows furrow, “i ... drank too much.”

“same here.” he stands up, unintentionally putting himself on display, “where are we? i can’t remember going—”

“denki!” you practically scream, shielding your eyes, “please put some damn pants on!”

“sorry.” you hear some movement and rustling before the sound of a zipper, “there. what about you? you’re naked too.”

“i know, give me a minute...” you look around and locate your underwear and jeans. you slip them on, clasping your bra and throwing on your shirt.

you stand up, face to face with denki; his neck is spotted with love bites, his hair tousled, cheeks a light pink. “we.. should probably get going.” you grab your dying phone and check the time, “oh my god, it’s 10:15, i’m late for work.”

“you work on saturdays?” your relax at the question, exhaling in relief.

“no, not on saturdays. i thought it was friday or something.” you laugh but a stab of pain shoots from your head all the way through your body.

“how much did we drink last night?” you turn to the golden blonde, who sighs as he opens the door.

“i have no idea, i was gonna ask you. but we drank something strong.”

“i’m surprised we didn’t puke.” you both walk down the staircase, surprised to find that the club’s empty; pretty sunrays peek through the windows and dust floats in the air around you.

“well, i didn’t, but you did.” denki’s hand is at the back of his neck and he turns away from you in embarrassment, shuddering.

you cringe at what he’s insinuating, closing your eyes for a brief second. “um.. i’m sorry.”

“it’s fine,” he feels kind of weird asking, “where are you going?”

“well, i was planning on heading to my apartment, which you don’t typically do with a one-night stand, but i guess i can make an exception for you.”

“i’m getting special treatment? i’m flattered.”

you roll your eyes as you open the door, squinting when the sun hits your face, “it’s the least i can do in exchange for the fun last night.”

denki bursts out into laughter, wiping faux tears from his eyes while you stand there, watching him. when his laughs finally slow down and he’s standing upright again, you elbow him in the ribs.

“looks like we’re gonna be walking a few blocks. we’d better hurry before it gets hot.”

“you don’t have a car?”

a glare from you is enough of an answer for him.

you throw the empty cup into the garbage, the spoon into the sink. you walk into your bedroom and water your plants on the windowsill, wishing that night would come fast.

it’s only 6:52 pm, and the sun sets at 7:30. before, time never felt so slow – probably because you had someone to spend it with. 

your lips pull into a frown and you place the green watering can back on the windowsill, huffing out a sigh. when had you gotten so damn lonely?

the second week of knowing denki and you’re holding onto his hand tightly as you walk through the dark field, ignoring his protests of ‘it’s dark!’ and ‘what if there’s wolves out here?!’

“calm down already! look, we’re almost there!” you point ahead and he shrieks.

“but there’s no light! seriously, we’re gonna get eaten by wolves or maybe even hawks!”

“jesus christ, denki. there’s no wolves out here, and hawks can’t grab us.” you aren’t fully sure about the wolves, but it’s just a white lie.. that he doesn’t need to know.

“are you sure?”

you stop, turning to him, looking him directly in the eyes. “come on, have some faith in me.”

denki slowly nods, visibly relaxing. you keep walking; it’s silent for the next few minutes, and eventually you finally come to a stop in an area where you can perfectly see the moon.

“why’d we stop?”

he stands before you, watching curiously as you grab a branch and wink at him.

“just watch.”

slowly, you sweep the branch over the grass, and fireflies rise in the air around you. a faint buzz fills the air as they float around you both; you sit down beside him.

denki’s eyes are half-wide in appreciation, lips parted. he turns his head to you, voice much calmer than it was earlier. “it looks.. magical.”

he was right, it did look quite magical that night. you check the time on your phone, 7:05 pm – just a little longer, you can make it.

placing the phone on your chest, you sigh as you close your eyes, letting your mind wander again.

“uhh, i don’t know about this...” this time you’re the one who’s hesitant to do something with him, worry consuming your mind as you sit on the side wall of the apartment.

“come on, you can do it! just glide.” denki excitedly holds a hand out to you and you pull your bottom lip between your teeth in worry, but you reluctantly nod and grab it.

his hand’s warm and soft when he pulls you up onto your feet, flashing you his all too familiar grin. “you’ll be fine, i’ve got you.”

your skin warms at his words and you decide that rollerskating with him is worth the effort. “okay.. so you just go forwards and gently push off each time?”

“pretty much, look.” he demonstrates proudly, you give him some applause before copying his exact movements, and surprisingly, you don’t fall.

“there you go! okay, come on, i wanna show you somewhere cool i found earlier!” he grabs your hand and skates forward so quickly you panic, unable to do anything else but glide with him.

“oh my god, don’t go so fast! you’re gonna run into a streetpole!”

“no, i won’t, i’ll be fine! come on, i think you’ll like the boba place i found!”

you open your eyes, checking your phone again – 7:32, just in time for the sunset. you get off your bed and start to walk out of your room, but a red gleam catches your eye – you turn to see the red rollerskates you wore with denki.

ignoring the pang in your heart, you grab a jacket and head out of your apartment, locking the door behind you before heading into the elevator.

you’re heading to the highest floor; up there, you’ll be able to get to the roof.

after punching in number eight, you lean against the wall, looking at your hands. a ding alerts you that you’ve arrived; you step out of the elevator and open the door at the end of the hall, walking up the small metal staircase – finally, you’re here.

you don’t make any moves to sit; that’s something new. instead, you stand on the roof, hands in your pockets as you watch the swirling plethora of colors dissolve into darkness in front of you.

“how long have you been living here?” denki shakes his head, droplets of water hitting your skin and you release a small laugh, stepping away from him.

“about four years or so.. it’s nice, isn’t it?”

“yeah, it is. it’s.. always awake, you know?”

“oh yeah,” you chuckle, understanding what he means about the city, “always. there’re cars going at 3 in the morning all the time. so many places are open to eat, it’s nice they cater to people’s late night cravings.”

“true.” he looks up at the leafy branches in thought, “i like citylife. it’s kinda boring if everything’s slow paced and sleepy.”

the rippling lake water catches the sunlight, glittering in the late afternoon sun. the field’s light green and grassy, all flat except for the few lone apple trees that dot its surface.

“sometimes you have to step away from the city to really enjoy nature.” you stand up and grab a red apple off a lower branch, taking a bite and offering it to him.

“they’re sweet, y’know.”

denki gives a huff, “i know what apples taste like.” he bites into the fruit, humming at its taste. he hands it back to you and you take another bite, savoring the fresh, crisp taste.

you sit down beside him, tilting your head back to look up at the different branches above you. your hair’s still damp from the swimming, your skin dewy with droplets of water.

“should we go back in?” you question, looking out towards the lake.

“only if we’re skinny dipping.”

“it’s.. light out. you’re supposed to go in the dark.”

“so?” denki grabs your hand and brings you up, “come on, it’ll be fun!”

you lay back with a sigh, arms crossed behind your head as you stare up at the cloudy night sky, unable to see any constellations due to the clouds and city light.

the moon peeks out from behind the clouds, almost shy to reveal its full light.

a rush of sadness fills your chest and you move your feet, not wanting to remember the particularly painful memory made right here.

“you’ve been silent all night, denki. what’s up with you?” his hand finds yours and gives it a squeeze.

“i’m sorry.”

“for what?”

“for not telling you something i should’ve told you sooner.. i’m heading back to japan tomorrow.”

you don’t respond but your heartbeat quickens as you look up at the sky. “why are you going to japan, denki?”

“because.. i live there. i come here every summer from the beginning of june to the end of july with some friends.”

“so you won’t be able to...” your voice fades in realization.

“we can call and text! we both have phones, right?” he’s trying to be cheery.

“it’s not the same,” you say, voice suddenly strained, “you’re.. what, sixteen hours ahead of me? it wouldn’t work, it’d be inconvenient for both of us.”

“here, i have an idea. give me your phone.” he hands you his, which is open to the ‘create a new contact’ page; you do the same, now sitting up.

you type in your phone number and a small note, then hand it back to him.

denki seems quite invested in his typing; it takes him a few good minutes before he’s finished. “don’t open the note ‘til i’m gone, okay?”

it seems you’d never opened it. why not? you take out your phone to open it, reliving your last memory.

“call me, okay?” denki’s grinning again, giving you a tight hug before getting on the plane. you’re wondering why he’s so happy – it’s a facade, of course. smiling always fends off the tears, right?

when he’s about to pull away, he realizes how you’re not letting go, head buried in his neck. “denki, be safe. don’t forget anything on the plane, okay?” your voice is light and you’re trying to joke with him, but he can sense that unsteadiness.

he hugs you tighter, tears forming in his eyes. “i love you.”

a weak sob escapes your lips and the tears start rushing out of your eyes. “i love you too, please be careful.”

you hadn’t spoken to him since that morning – three weeks ago. why hadn’t you stayed in touch?

the note opens and you immediately read it, tears welling up in your eyes.

‘to y/n, the most amazing girl i’ve ever met.. i’ve enjoyed it all, from the most awkward morning of my life to the first time i’ve ever gone up on a roof with someone. it’s been really fun, i’m going to miss this. i get it if you don’t wanna stay in touch; it’s too painful sometimes, you know? but aside from our adventures, i’ve really enjoyed bonding with you as a person. you’re funny, sarcastic, and all around amazing. i love you - see you next summer.’

he was right in his message; it is too painful to stay in touch sometimes. you exit the contacts list, wiping at your eyes and smearing your makeup as you open the messaging app, beginning to type out a message,

hey, i miss you.

taglist // @sobaluvr​ @bbytamaki​ 

[bethanysnow]

Okay! Everyone listen up. This is one post and only one post.

Some of yall need to chill out with the Damiano stuff. First it was his hair, some other stuff happened, now a bunch of folks are upset he said a lyric/slur in a kanye west song that doesnt hold any weight in any other place other than the U.S. Which I get and understand isnt a good thing. And should be sorted out. The lyric being said when they were a band with a smaller fanbase.

I am not black, but I am from the u.s and wasnt even aware this word A. Exsisted B. Was a slur until today.

If the black fans from the U.S are upset then of course, we can figure it out from here.

But some of yall are acting very inappropriate, digging through peoples ask boxes and calling them racists just because they dont wanna participate in this discourse. Some of us (a lot of us) are tired of this. This is a particularly U.S centred slur, when most of the fanbase is international from the U.S.

Like how Brits call cigarettes f*gs, words dont have the weight they do in other places. I am not saying that it’s not wrong and forgive and forget and all that. What I am saying is, we as a collective shouldn’t bulldoze and destroy and vilify. He said a slur that was originated in the U.S. That is not okay. Plain and simple. But we must keep in mind whats idk, important? Like knowing when something is too far. I know so many people who just hear a song on the radio and think its cool and sing along. Does that make him a bad person? for liking a song? no. What it does is make him uninformed. Everyone is uninformed until they learn. So, for context the word was a derogatory word to describe black people from the 1920s and 1930s. It has changed and been used in different ways, but that's where it originates from the research Ive seen.

If you are black and from the U.S and are upset you have every right to be. But if you are any other race and upset I ask you why? Are you upset on behalf of black folks from the U.S? Are you legit upset he said a slur? On behalf of black folks in general? Did they ask you to be upset on behalf of them? What is your reasoning- I dont want to know your reasoning, but its important you do.

Because then I ask are you upset cuz you wanna be upset about something-

We are a baby fandom. We are working out the kinks. They are a bunch of 20 year olds who got really lucky. Things happen and we grow as people but my god. Stand behind the yellow line my guy.

And I know for a fact if most of yall had a giant group of 'fans' digging through your shit that you did when you were younger? There would be some stuff that yall would get crucified for. So chill out.

Take a breath. Touch grass. Stop calling people in the fandom racists. Stop telling people to kys. Damiano david is a singer in a italian rock band. We should be here for the music. And if the people who are effected by this want an apology then they will ask for one. The best thing anyone can do is educate themselves and then let it breathe. Holding someone in a vice grip will drive them away and off the internet. Do you want damiano to stop posting on the internet? I know I dont.

I am not here to say what we should or shouldn't do as a fandom on a grand level. But we sure as hell shouldnt be telling people to kys. That's human decency and common sence.

Stop spamming the writers.

[1990jeevas]

Plesse tell me about queerness in the get down!!

okay okay queerness in the get down let's fuckn goooo

disclaimer: I havent watched this show in full for like 5 months at least, probably gonna get something wrong and/or forget some more important bits. also this wasnt proof read I just word vomited

tws: period typical homophobia, abuse mention, f slur use, bury your gays trope, overdose mention, mention of a creepy possible age gap (the age gap hasnt been confirmed so that's why its possible), cops

going from least to most prominent queer characters, let's start with mylene cruz!

so, from the beginning of this show she has an established romantic relationship with ezekiel (although the status of their actual relationship changes frequently throughout the show) and though this was a relationship she was hesitant to pursue, it is clear that she does have romantic feelings for him and if not for them both having growing careers in very different music genres (zeke specifically working in a genre that she repeatedly labels as bad because she thinks they're ruining records + that it isnt real music because they're using someone elses piece and rapping over it, that's not really important here tho lol) they probably wouldve had a much healthier, smooth sailing romance. that being said theres a few things that happen in the show that, while not explicitly clear, or even really good coding at that—to the point where you wont catch if you really arent looking for it (and trust me, I always look for coding, hers was just so little that it flew over my head until I saw someone else mention it)—are still cool to think about!

so, for starters, I wanna mention the toy box performance, which was performed by mylene and regina, who are best friends. that's all cool and shit, and you dont really think much about it...until you hear about the fact that the show runners purposely colored a lot of the scenes in that performance with the bi colors. like. the writers after the show ended basically said "oh yeah there was plans to make her coding more explicit, but our shit got cancelled soooo" and then dropped the fact that she was gonna be bi (or at least implies bi) in the series, which puts a new twist on a few things.

now, besides the bi coloring in the background of the toy box performance (which was mostly on scenes with her and regina, which involved a lot of uh,, lowkey lewd dancing. with each other. in very revealing outfits. wooooo), there's her music! I dont tend to read too much into this one bc, like I said before, her coding is fucking light and the writers themselves said they didnt really get to do much with it, but I think some stuff with her music is interesting. specifically how her, yolanda and regina's song set me free blew up because dizzee, resident (lowkey enby coded) bicon, got their song played in a queer club. also that the song was majorly important to dizzee and started playing literally right as he kissed a boy for the first time and realized "oh shit I like boys that's bonkers". also that the song can be taken in a gay way since literally the entire thing is about becoming your true self, fully and unapologetically, which is what both dizzee and mylene's entire character arcs are about. dizzee (and a lot of other queer people, apparently), heard this song about being set free and it resonated with them so much that they got that shit most of its popularity.

speaking of dizzee and mylene, they parallel each other a lot in the way that their arcs are about them realizing who they are, coming into themselves and no longer just letting people treat them like shit in a sense (dizzee starting to tell people essentially that they can call him weird all they want, they can make fun of how he acts, what he likes, how he dresses, etc. but he likes how he is and quite literally saying "it's okay to be an alien" as he has consistently compared himself to one throughout the show vs mylene learning that if she wants to be a disco singer she needs to put her foot down, not let anyone, not even the love of her life, not even her abusive father, stop her from achieving her dreams, etc. and continuing to pursue her career with or without their support). one more little parallel that I think is interesting is during I think s2 towards the end of the show is when dizzee and thor are shown together having fun with each other, painting all over the building and each other and are basically just being happy and in love together and then they have these clips of them being interspersed with clips of mylene at a party where she is starting to realize that if she wants to get anywhere she needs to be her own main priority and that she needs to put her career and her dream, which is what makes her the happiest, above all else if she wants to succeed. idk I just think how the show made these two into a weird parallel, accidental or not, is neat. maybe not an explicitly queer parallel, but I think at least how her music and whatnot helped dizzee, the main queer character in this show, blossom, is important.

moving on we got shaolin fantastic also known as "oh no your internalized homophobia is showing-"

so, heres a quick list of...interesting shao facts:

Consistently referred to as fag/faggot (shaolin fanfaggot is my personal favorite); he gets really defensive about this despite nobody actually thinking he's queer, it's just people being assholes to be assholes, and he is the only character consistently referred to using a slur, especially a homophobic one, especially for a "straight" character. dizzee, a canonically queer character, is called a fag less than shaolin is even though dizzee actively goes to gay clubs, has a not so secret dude he "hangs out with" and wont let anyone properly meet, paints his nails, wears less than straight clothes even by the 70s standards and is just all around the definition of fucking queer (and I mean like in the weird way, not the gay way). in fact theres only like once I can remember him being called a fag and it had nothing to do with him actually being gay it was literally just like thrown out there the same way you would call someone a bitch.

Has only shown sexual interest in women, yet refuses to have deeper relationships with women in general (possibly because of trauma but who knows) but takes his relationships with his "brothers", specifically zeke, very seriously

Tells zeke and zeke ONLY his real name when zeke was planning to stop being his friend bc shao more or less got boo boo, a like 14 year old black kid, arrested for selling hard drugs; he was clearly scared and trying to do anything to keep zeke around, literally chasing him down the street and hounding him until he got zeke to stop and argue with him

Kept threatening to beat up zeke in the end but couldn't actually bring himself to do so, instead saying that zeke is "fucking lucky" before walking away

Let's zeke get away with things that nobody else can, in general just has a weird soft spot for ezekiel that he shows with nobody else

when shao found dizzee with thor in a vaguely compromising situation (like they were just shirtless covered in paint sleeping next to each other but shao had also seen everything they painted on the walls ((which some of it was sus)), it was clear they had painted on each others bodies and dizzee had been routinely disappearing with this guy for weeks now yet not producing nearly as much art, at least, as far as we audience members know) he didnt judge him but instead, waited for him to get cleaned up and then told him something along the lines of "theres a reason why im so secretive blah blah blah [not everyone needs to know everything about me]", which, in context, kinda implies that he might be a lil. a lil homiesexual. jus a lil.

whenever even the possibility of zeke leaving him comes up he absolutely loses it. he has literally cost ezekiel life changing opportunities because he thought zeke would just up and leave him for them. this could be abandonment issues bc he's a severely traumatized character, and that probably does contribute to it, but it also is just not a reaction he has to any of their other friends just randomly dipping in and out of his life soooooo

generally speaking, this mfer has got either bisexual with a big hard on for zeke coding or homosexual with terrible internalized homophobia and still a hard on for zeke coding. either fucking way, that nigga gay. he gay as hell. gay as fuck man. there wasn't really much to analyze here tbh bc the coding is just so fucking obvious if you look for it or you are/have been a gay person who's dealt with at least a little bit of internalized homophobia.

also, just a sidenote, idk how fucking old shao, but I'm praying hes like at max 19 bc I'm pretty sure zeke is a minor in this show and shao definetly is not so the whole him being heavily implied to have a crush on ezekiel thing is kinda. oof. not oof if zeke is like 17 but any younger than that? OOF.

edit: apparently the characters are only supposed to be a year apart in age but i had no clue about that before writing this post and since shaos age was never actually stated in the show i naturally assumed he was an adult since his actor Looks Like An Adult. this is definetly on me to a certain extent, but i also never saw anything about this when trying to find our their ages so 🤷‍♀️ maybe i just didnt look deep enough, sorry!

now moving on to the main event...marcus dizzee kipling :]

so, first things first, let's talk enby coding bc him being bisexual was already confirmed!

um, to start off, I just wanna say I dont think this enby coding was intentional or even really coding, it's just moreso me being a dizzee kin on main and knowing as a transmasc enby he has very transmasc enby vibes. for example:

cool, gender neutral nickname that everyone calls him

paints nails various different colors

the whole wardrobe is just a transmasc enby heaven...fishnet shirts, jean overalls, jackets and cuffed pants galore, the big colorful pins, etc

gender neutral hairstyle (when I had my fro it was very sexy and made it easy to transition between hyper masc and vaguely fem, which is pog)

comparing himself to/representing himself consistently with an alien character (though this is meant to represent his sexuality, it could also double as a gender thing too, not neccesarily bc of the whole nonbinary alien trope but bc an enby who likes aliens might heavily identify or compare themselves to whatever their idea of an alien is, whether that just be a genderless entity or a motherfucker with fly style and no need to be perceived as anything other Wacky As Hell)

moving on from there, let's talk about how his queerness is presented to us and how, while it may be a really good piece of representation, especially coming from netflix, it still lacks in A Lot of places.

so, let's start with good things!

i personally really like the get down's queer rep with dizzee bc it's (for the most part) nonsexualized and very very soft, about dizzee figuring himself out and realizing there is a place where he fits in, and about two teenagers in the 70s falling in love over their shared passion for street art. it also features an interracial couple where both boys challenge stereotypes both about queer men and men of color, which is epic poggers and very sexy. this piece of rep specifically is very important to me bc I am a queer black person and even tho interracial relationships are mostly normalized now, I've still had people give me shit for primarily dating white people in a town that is...primarily white lol

mm anyways, I can also appreciate how in the get down, dizzee being represented by rumi the alien is not a thing specifically related to gender (as it often is) and instead is about his sexuality and just in general weirdness and how it has led to him being alienated amongst his peers, poc or otherwise. him seeing himself as an alien is not about just his queerness, which is important, it is about him being a queer black man who talks different, acts different, dresses different and is "soft"—he isnt a walking black male stereotype and he wouldnt have been seen as masculine back in the 70s by any stretch of the imagination. this can be relatable to a wide spectrum of queer poc, from queer black men currently who still have to deal with this shit or to people like myself who are afab neurodivergent mixed race enbies that have always been signaled out as weird and alienated for it. dizzee is god rep bc while he has a small part in this show, his parts are very impactful, hard hitting and show queer poc of all ages that they arent alone and that it's okay to "weird", you just need to embrace it because somebody will love you for you, as thor did for dizzee.

that being said theres um. some minor problemas here,,,

namely:

dizzee and thors first kiss

the lack of development this pairing got

the way dizzee was confirmed bisexual off screen, he never said the words himself, just showed interest in both genders

the way dizzee and thor were never even confirmed boyfriends or just fwb so most of the fandom just calls them boyfriends bc Why Not

dizzee was implied fucking DEAD??? AT THE END OF THE SERIES?????? AND THOR WAS IMPLIED ARRESTED?????????????

now, these might have been things that wouldve been fine had the show been given it's full run but it wasnt which is why we are now left with probelms.

so, from the top, let's go over these: dizzee and thor's first (and only "on screen") kiss was one that was shown in a montage of other queer people making over and doing other vaguely romantic/sexual things, one of those things being a whole ass naked titty being mouthed at, but the actual kiss...was just not shown? like they really did just say "yes they kissed <3 you know this from the context clues of it being in a montage with kissing, hickey giving and titty sucking <3 but no we will not show it <3" LIKE HELLO? I SAW A NAKED BOOBIE BUT NOT TWO MEN KISS??? HUH????????

also, dizzee and thor were both fucking high as hell during this bit like this isnt a terrible thing but it's also like sometimes you do shit when you're high that you wouldnt do sober and they just never kissed again on screen so like?? like idk that's not that bad but it does kinda irk me since they deadass got no other on screen intimacy after that unless you including painting on eacher other or sleeping next to each other on a shitty mattress but not touching at all during it bc they were both at opposite ends of the mattress like half way off it

so yeah, that was trash. then we got lack of development, which kinda goes with the "dizzee being a bisexual but he never says it in canon" thing cause like...okay dizzee was already sort of a side character from the get go like he wasnt the mc by any means, but he became way more of a background character as things continued until we basically only saw him for performances or when he was with thor, yet they got no fucking development as a pairing other than "dizzee realize he gay, he like thor, he and thor spend time together and ig probably do some gay stuff but we dont really know bc we only ever see them do graffiti together now" like?? tf am I supposed to do with that shit. answer. quickly. and then theres dizzee not being confirmed bisexual, which is just a running problem with shows literally doing everything to say a character is bi except for having the character just...say they're bi? which would be so easy? like a good way dizzee and thor couldve had some development is by thor teaching dizzee things about the queer community that he didnt even know existed, thor couldve helped him understand what being bi meant and helped him label himself and whatnot but instead we got an off screen confirmation that the writers had bisexual in mind when writing him. which is garbagé.

the whole thor and dizzee never having a confirmed relationship status is also a development problem cause like literally nobody knows if they were just friends who made out, maybe fucked, who knows, or if they were dating bc dizzee does give a love confession but a love confession doesn't mean there is a relationship, especially since thor didn't say he was in love either (as far as I remember, I could be wrong, plus whether or not that really happened or was apart of dizzee literally overdosing during a performance is unclear so 🤪)

and now for the biggest issue...bury your gays trope.

during the season 2 finale, dizzee and thor are chased by cops after they are found doing graffiti, one of the cops is able to catch thor while the other chases dizzee into a train tunnel and there is a train seen headed straight for him before the show cuts to black on a train horn. the show writers claim that if they had gotten another season, dizzee wouldve been alive but since they didnt and since that's essentially super fan trivia knowledge, most people dont fucking know that and instead had to watch a black queer teenager chose death over being fucking arrested by a white cop. on top of that, thor didnt see any of that shit because he was caught and the cop started hauling him off while dizzee was still being chased so thor literally has no clue where his friend/possible boyfriend fucking is or that he's likely dead in a goddamn tunnel all alone, unless you count the fucking pig that chased him in there who wouldve died too. this shows rep was so fucking good as far as most shows go on not having major fucking problems, on not being toxic and over sexualized, etc, etc. and then they just. killed a black queer teenager for no fucking reason. like it was literally the last episode ever, it would add nothing to the plot, it would just devastate fans and devastate it fucking did. I dont cry easy but seeing a character I identified with, who I had hyperfixated on, die because he'd rather that than be arrested is terrible. it fucking sucked.

so yeah. that's my all too extensive thoughts/analysis on the get down's queerness. theres definitely stuff I missed, or misinterpreted, or looked too much into, etc, etc., but this was a fun thing to spend time writing sooo yeah!! thanks for the ask anon, sorry this was just a big rambley info dump, but hopefully you get some enjoyment out of it since it took like 3 hours at least 😭😭 feel free to ask clarifying questions lol

[i-did]

hi hello i couldn't sleep last night so i was scrolling thru all ur asks and stuff and ur opinions and analyses are so interesting!!! and then afterwards i was thinking about what u were saying about mlm smut and i'd also been thinking about such things a little bit recently bc like.....at a certain point it becomes quite clear that the vast majority of smut-writing is just imitation. like there's the sex noise verb list and all and the whole general mechanics of the sex and those things just .... replicate over and over. and the whole thing w people writing mlm vs wlw smut regardless of their own sexual orientation..... like i feel like a big part of that is just a self-perpetuating thing. like if u have not had sex and u r getting all ur (pleasure-related) sex ed from fandom (even if u do watch porn, that doesn't rlly tell u how to describe stuff? idk) regardless of What fandom , the majority is going to be mlm smut. which is itself majority imitation of other mlm smut, imitating and imitating back to whoever knows what the first smut fanfic was etc. there's just way More to mimic than there is on the women side of things. which then becomes a self-perpetuating thing, bc the mimicry continues and generates more and more. and---if there are fundamental misunderstandings of anatomy involved---those self-perpetuate as well. and maybe even exaggerate. and yeah. does this all make sense? idk i was just thinking about it. like all the stereotypes and stuff continue bc writers are getting their inspo from other writers rather than their own brains. or something. idk!!!!! it's just all... divorced from reality? bc words. or something!! i hope u get what i'm trying to say. just thoughts i've been thinking. anyway i think ur thoughts are cool. and ur writing. ok bye have a good day!!

Okay yeah this is kinda messy but hope u see this, uhh yeah I think you're right about the echo chamber effect fr about stuff. I think it's a mix of projecting too sometimes. talk more under the cut and also link to a video essay since I love video essays.

Here’s a video that sort of touches on this topic: 

“Gay fanfiction” by Sarah Z. (has CC)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8E_C00dKwI

This video begins to talk about fetishization at the end, but also… not really. The words “gay fanfiction” is used as a catchall, when really gay fanfiction is largely mlm written by non-mlm.

Fandom is a largely women's space dominated by the female gaze in a media industry world that is dominated by men and the male gaze. I'm really glad women have this space to explore creativity and queerness, and I don't expect the female gaze to go away, but I am still ultimately bummed out I can’t read most fanfic or interact with most fandom spaces without having fetishization in my face. 

So about 80% of fandom is women, and most of those women aren't straight, but 90% of those women prefer mlm ships. Why don’t they prefer wlw ships? Well definitely part of it is the fact that queerbaiting is centered around white straight men, and then there is also the fact that women tend not to be written as well charcter wise. But the fact still remains that you get jerjean getting priority over Layla and Alvarez who are in canon just as much and are a canon wlw couple who actually interact as well as Alvarez could likely be a woc because of her Hispanic last name. Korasami doesn’t get nearly as much hype as zuko and saka, despite the fact that they are 2 fully dimensional characters who canonly kiss and hold hands, something the creators fought for and ended up having to sacrifice another reboot for. 

I do believe the fandom echo-chamber is largely responsible for… a lot of things, like you're saying. But what's interesting is that the complaints I've heard about visual porn from non mlm in the fandom space is that they can’t get off to it because its for the male gaze and misogynistic usually. But they also don't seem to notice how the mlm smut circles has the female gaze and is also… almost always mlm. If it was a pure anatomical not knowing thing, I get that, but I also think that leads to the question of “then why the male body for porn, and not your own? The one you know and are familiar with?” 

I know some people want to get outside of their own body for porn and don’t want to think of their own anatomy at all, but overall I'm still uncomfortable. If an anglo said “well I watch porn of only Mexicans so I don't self insert” I'm gonna be like … hhhh in a similar way. I understand people “like what they like” but I wish they also noticed said patterns in the first place. I understand the t4t tumblr porn circle, and how it's different from cis people who only watch trans porn. 

I actually wished that instead of fandom focusing on mlm ships where some asshole guy hits on bottom troupe charcter for top troupe character to save, was instead… a wlw character experiencing said shitty getting hit on and other wlw swooping in. what's interesting is fandom writes a lot about misogynistic experiences without often realizing it. Ive read fanfic where guys get called sluts for sleeping with people or called bitch for speaking their mind, these arent things men usually experience, but rather women. Fandom has a lot of internalized misogyny and also queerphobia imo. Women characters often get pushed to the sidelines and men become the canvas for female fans to project onto. 

There is this natural inclination to mlm. When people are talking about “gay shipping” or “gay books” or “gay feels” or even just “gay” mlm is what’s largely in mind. I honestly am kinda saddened by this because if gay fanfiction was really solely about writing more to feel represented, then you would see a lot of bi and ace and lesbian rep, but this isn't the case. Queer women are seriously underrepresented, and I want to hear their stories and read them in fanfiction as well as published. 50% of lgbt literature is mlm, and of that its largely written by women. Becky Albertalli, Rainbow Rowell, Maggie Stiefvater, are the YA big names and are all women writing mlm. Red white and royal blue is written by Casey McQuiston and Captive prince (which is not YA) is written by C. S. Pacat, who is non-binary, but is also TME and not mlm. These are all the big names in mlm lit, behind them is some gay men, but honestly their stories aren't preferred, they're not the right “flavor” for the consumers usually, who are largely women. In general YA consumers and authors are women, but I wish that they… just wrote about women too. I think there is a certain… snowball effect to the overrepresentation of mlm representing the whole LGBT community that leads to fetishization, as well as misogyny playing a factor in: less women characters being written well to write fanfic on, when they are written well they're taken less seriously or the audience struggles to relate to them, they're less marketable then men. 

Idk I never feel “seen” or “represented” by any of the books above, which don't address boyhood and manhood and queerness intersecting really, and AFTG doesn’t either. I relate to AFTG as a trauma victim who has experienced a lot of what many of the characters go through and have gone through in the EC as well as them just overall being very well written characters, but I don't relate to it as a mlm really. I've never seen like.. gay voice or being straight passing or femphobia or how boyhood can be affected from a young age by those around you sensing you're ‘other’ or if you didn't experience this you feel outside the mlm community. Let alone sub cultures like bear and leather and pup, at most you see the word “he's such a twink” in fandom which... i fr hate non mlm using that word because it's usually used to replace the f-slur essentially, used derogatorily or to call him “such a bottom” and stuff like that. It’s like a joke or an insult.

Long story short, idk mang this was a ramble and I think I'm coning down with something. I wanna see more queer women rep and women authors writing about being a queer woman too. I think it's a complex web of fetishization and a bit of forbidden love yaoi culture (or it used to be in the BOYXBOY days) as well as misogyny on an industry level, creator level, as well as reader/consumer and fandom level. I don’t think it’s inherently wrong to explore other peoples stories and what we read has to be segregated, “only mlm are allowed to read and write mlm, only wlw are allowed to read and write wlw,” but I also think author’s intent and audience and background is telling, as well as overall statistics. Like about an hour ago I was looking for cookbooks in spanish or in english, and I was looking for some mexican food cook books, but I had to look for them using words in spanish because otherwise what came up was a bunch of “fiesta party, easy as uno dos tres authentic cooking!” and I was like… hm. Since I could tell they were marketing to anglos. (also the author’s last names were like michelle smith, james cooper, and this could be for a variety of reasons, but I trust Hispanic names more tbh and deadass would look at the authors pictures and if they had other books in Spanish or what their specialties were.)

anyways. not sure how to end this. uhm if anyone has any book recs (my to read list is like 500 books tho no joke) preferably not YA white mlm written by a white lady, hopefully queer women written by queer woman, LMK, I need more wlw and queer women stories on my list. I have a decent amount but always looking for more. I kinda wanna link my goodreads or my storygraph but I also don't want to get doxxed and it has my legal name on it so.

Also, I'm dyslexic and using spell check but if there's like some wild typos my b.

[infernwetrust]

Never Enough [Jim Mason x Fem Reader] Pt 1.

Summary: The one where you and Jim have been dating for about a year and a half. And even after a year and a half, he still feels like he’s not enough for you, but of course you know he’s more than enough. 

Warnings: drug use, swearing, mentions of drug use, mentions of drug abuse, teeny bit mentions of domestic violence, mentions of smut, (don’t worry it’s coming)

WC: 2.1k 

A/N: First time writing about Jim. Honestly, he came to me in a dream a few nights ago and I just had to write something. Part 1 of a 2 part series. Thank you for reading! -Juno

Jim had finally convinced you to come to a party hosted by one of his friends. The music was loud and the only thing that lit up the room was a set amount of strobe lights. As you danced next to Medina, you watched your boyfriend closely. It made you warm to see him so happy. Drink in his hand, joint between his lips, he shared laughs with his friends. His hair was a sweaty mess from dancing all evening or engaging in stupid stunts.

He noticed that your eyes were burning into him. He looked up from his cup, his blue eyes meeting yours in a haze and whirlpool of emotions. You could tell sober Jim was far gone, but he was still your Jim. Jim has had sex with you not sober more times than he was sober. Shrooms were his favorite. He liked how sometimes he felt like a feather and sometimes he felt like a brick.

Removing his lips from his cup, he smiled at you, motioning for you to come over, but as you told him, this was his night. You two spent most of the days wrapped up in each other and decided that a few hours not being down each others throats were okay. You shook your head no, biting your lip at him.

"Have fun with your friends." you mouthed causing him to give you a drunken grin.

"You are my friend." he mouthed back, motioning for you to come over again and of course you shook your head no again, turning your attention from him and back onto Medina. It's not that you didn't want to be around him, because trust me, you did. You wanted to walk over there, take a sip of his drink, and press your lips to his. You wanted to jump into his arms and carry you away, but, you meant what you said.

"He can't get enough of you, can he?" she asked, running her hands through her hair.

"I would hope not." you replied. "But it's also good to give the boy some space. We haven't had any time apart really and I know he's been wanting to hang out with his friends."

"Well, I'm getting pretty tired of being inside. Beach house, beach party. Did you remember to bring your surf board?"

"I did! It's in Jim's car and he has the keys.. which means I would have to go ask him for the keys."

"And you know that comes with 21 questions."

"Orrrrrrr, you could go ask him."

"Where's the fun in that?"

"It's not gonna be fun when I get trapped with Jim."

"As if you don't want to. I know you've been staring at him all night."

"Will you please just go get them? Pretty please." Medina giggled knowing that she was just messing with you. She made her way off to Jim, engulfing her brother into a hug before engaging in conversation. After what about 5 minutes but seemed like 30 due to your own mild intoxication, you assumed she asked for his keys because he darted his eyes back and forth between Medina and you. He took his keys out his pocket, placing them in her hands before running his hands messily in her hair and sending her on her way.

"Okay, come on." she said, grabbing your hand. "Let's go get that surf board and change into our suits." Changing, you and Medina stood on the beach, staring at the ocean as the sun set.

"I'm glad I met you." you say to her. "And I'm glad you introduced me to Jim. Surfing was never something I thought I would be doing, but look at me now."

"Do you always have to make me cry, Y/N?" she asked. "We love you, so much. I'm glad I met you too and that you haven't turned your back on Jim and I. Especially, Jim. He's so fragile nowadays, especially with, you know. I don't like to bring it up at all. You convinced Jim to stop abusing those pills, something I've been trying to do for a while. You saved his life, Y/N."

But all of that came with its consequences. In the beginning of your relationship with Jim, the two of you fought constantly. Argue, fuck, and then makeup. And that's all it was for about 2 months into your year and a half relationship. If you were fighting Jim about his pills or trying to throw them away, he was fighting you about another boy that talked to you that day. No matter how many times you tried to reassure Jim that you weren't going anywhere, for the first 2 months of your relationship, he didn't believe you. And of course, that crushed you, but it wasn't enough to make you leave him.

Jim has only ever gotten physical with you once. High off of whatever he did that day, he shoved you a little too hard, causing you to hit your head on the side of the door frame a little too hard. You saw stars before you blacked out and from that day on he never touched you in a way that wasn't caring. Of course you forgave him. When Jim wasn't acting crazy, he was the sweetest boy in the world. Beach campfires, dinners, shopping sprees, Jim showed you nothing but love, because you did the same for him. In reality, you and Medina are all he has.

But Jim doesn't know how much he's helped you either. He was your first. Your first love too. You love him. You are in love with him and he knows that. Because he feels the same about you. Yes, you've dated other guys, but they were no where close as worthy as Jim was to having you. He rushed nothing. You didn't want to be touched right now? He was okay with that. You wanted to make out all night and not go any further? He was okay with that. You wanted to dry hump him just enough for the itch even though you weren't ready? He was okay with that.

4 months. You made Jim wait 4 months for you and when you finally told him you wanted to go all the way, a fire ignited in him. He took care of you. He made it all about you. He made sure you came first and more than once. You still remember his sweet voice asking if this and that is okay or if he was hurting you, but all you kept telling him was that you need to feel him and that you need to feel him now. And once the pain turned into pleasure, you got lost in him. For the next week, all you wanted was Jim inside of you. He was covered, back, chest, arms, and ass, in scratches that stung like hell to touch. He would laugh as you apologized for it, kissing on them, cleaning them up so they wouldn't get infected, but he loved that you loved to mark him up. The two of you caused a great concern, being covered in hickeys. Your parents thought he was abusing you and Medina thought that he was on the streets fighting, but the both of you know why. Jim, he was, he was made for you.

"Medina." you said, snapping yourself out of your own thoughts.

"Hmmm?" she questioned as the two of you continued to stare off into the water.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"Everything. Now let's go hit these waves." The evening, well into the night was spent with you and Medina laughing as you toppled over on your surf board a few times. You played in the sand, drawing random things, even playing tic tac toe. As soon as the two of you dried off and decided that you wanted to get back in the water again, just to swim, you felt a strong pair of hands around you. Whoever grabbed you smelt heavily of beer and weed. You were about to freak out when you saw the pair of hands that were wrapped around your body. Jim.

"Heyyyy." he slurred in your ear, wobbling as he struggled to hold himself up. "You two enjoying the ocean without me?" You turned around to meet him, he was so sweaty, not just his hair, but his whole body. His eyes were super red and bloodshot.

"Jim." you said. "Are you okay? You're burning up. Let's get you out of these clothes. Medina you can go ahead and get back in the water, I'll be out there with you in a minute."

"I'm fucking thriving, baby." Jim answered you, almost falling back into the sand, but you grabbed his shirt to hold him up.

"How many have you had and what did you have?"

"Shit, I don't fucking know. Maybe like 9. I smoked a little green. Just kidding, I smoked a lot of green and I took a shroom, baby, I am on cloud nine right now. They tried to get me to take a pill, but I said, no no no, Y/N wouldn't like that." He started to giggle.

"Jim you look like you're about to expire."

"Expire from happiness!" You sighed, getting Jim to sit down in the sand. You took his jacket off, followed by his shirt, moving his hair out his face so it wouldn't get into his eyes. You fought for a little bit to get his pants off, but he did let you take them off of him.

"Come on." you said, struggling to pick him back up. "Let's sit a little closer to the water, cool you down."

"Mhmmmmk." was all he said as stumbled getting up, falling back down hard into the sand. "Mmmph, shit. I'm okay. I'm okay."

"Is he gonna be okay?!" Medina shouted to ask you from the water.

"Yeah!" you responded. "He's just fucking out of it!"

"Hey, don't you talk about me." he slurred, finally getting back up on his own two feet. "I'm doing just fine." You wrapped your arm around his waist and the both of you, mostly because of him, stumbled closer to the water, sitting on the beginning of the sand bar. "You are so fucking pretty, has anyone told you that? Well no one besides me should be telling you that anyways."

"You do, all the time, baby." you replied, giving him a warm smile. As the waves came on shore and went, you made sure that Jim got wet to cool his body down. You got water in your hands to put on his hair, making sure none of it got in his eyes, because it is ocean water after all. And all while you were doing this, he was sitting there thinking how he didn't deserve you. He was sitting next to you, a drunken and high mess in the sand, wondering how he got so lucky.

"Why do you do this for me?" he asked, swaying a little bit.  

"Because I love you, Jim. No matter what. We all still have some demons to fight and we're going to fight them together."

"I'm so tired of fighting my demons." You could hear that he wanted to start crying. "I'm so fucked up. I feel like I'm never enough for you. You deserve so much more than what I give you."

"Jim do you remember what we said to each other the first time you ever spent the night at my house?" Well he probably doesn't because he's too intoxicated. You questioned yourself as to why you even asked, but then he gave you answer.

"If it ever gets too much, or you want out, or you feel like you can't do this anymore, the first sign, so we don't hurt each other, say something."

"And I haven't said anything and I don't plan on saying anything. Jim you are more than enough for me. Behind your hard exterior, is a caring guy and that's who I fell in love with." He sighed, slowly laying back into the sand, not caring how many times the water brushed up against him. You did the same, turning your head to meet his gaze. You ran your hand across his cheek, running your thumb over his perfectly shaped jaw. You could tell his was trying to calm down, trying to ride his intoxication, rather than letting it ride him. His breathing slowed from being erratic to almost normal. He grabbed onto your hand, giving it a gentle kiss before placing it on his chest.

"I love you so much, Y/N. And I know I'm a little fucked right now, but I mean that. Sober or not sober." he slurred. "I m-m-m" He hiccuped.

"Ssssh." You put your finger to his lips, just wanting him to focus on calming himself down. "Relax, baby. Close your eyes if you need to. I know and I'm right here with you."

I'll always be right here with you.

Taglist: @jimmason @angelicmichael @whatcodysaid

[jasonndeans]

young gods - shane “dio” morrissey x reader

word count: 1,990

warnings: brief scene involving harassment and brief use of the f slur at the end.

chapter: 1/?

summary:  You weren't looking for anything when you met Dio, but you also couldn't take your eyes off of him. You were drawn to him, shrouded in black mystery and his softer side he kept well hidden under that duster. A part of you knew when you first saw him, he was destined to fly too close to the sun. At first, it wasn't really anything he said or anything he did. It was the feeling that came along with him. You'd never felt this way before, and the crazy thing is, you didn't know if you should. You knew his world moved too fast and burned too bright, but...how can the Devil be pulling you towards someone who looks so much like an angel when he smiles at you? Maybe he knew that when he met you, too.

Dio didn’t have much to bring with him on the day he took you up on your offer to live with you in your small New York City apartment; small, albeit big enough for two. He carried almost all of his earthly possessions with him in his pockets — the keys to his father’s ancient, barely running Honda, a pack of cigarettes, loose cash and change, and his trusty switch. The rest would have to be crammed into his car and hauled over, mostly consisting of clothes and shoes, thrifted or stolen. 

“I was wonderin’ when you’d rescue me from the Smack Shack,” he’d quipped, lips curling.

“The Smack Shack” is what he’d dubbed the worn-down, abandoned place he and his buddies — all of them pursuers of a list of drugs, some of them sellers like Dio — often crashed in when a softer, more secure sofa couldn’t be reserved for the night. Thus, The Smack Shack. You’d visited a handful of times despite the fact that it gave you the creeps. Dio had your trust, as did…some of his friends. The neighborhood just wasn’t the safest in Manhattan, needless to say, and there was no guessing what shady characters were looming about in these hollowed out homes. You’re just glad he’s out of there. And with you.

“Ohh, I rescued you, huh?” You’d teased back, your voice lilting in a sing-song tone. “I must be your knight in shining armor.”

He hummed in the back of his throat with a mock grimace, leaning forward to kiss you. “Don’t make me sick, birdie.” His lips were chapped and tasted of smoke, and as much as you detested the habit, it was something so purely Dio. A smirk played on his lips upon pulling back with decorated fingers idly tapping out a rhythm onto a tabletop of a squat little sandwich shop you worked at. “I seem to remember things differently.” Expectant, he cocked his head, casting a shadow of his star-shaped earring onto his neck -- one of many, many things that endeared you to the boy in black.

As if on cue, you turned sheepish with a duck of your head and a bashful smile cast downwards. He was referring to the day you two first met. Officially, that is. Along with the thrill of waitressing and constructing sandwiches, you worked behind a cash register at a record shop -- Empire Records. Music’s always been a constant comfort for you, in your ears when you needed a voice to scream your sorrows, your rampages or your little victories. You’d amassed quite the collection of records as you grew and your music taste with you for a player you’d fixed up and obtained from a seller when on the hunt for more important things like furniture and necessities to fill your then new apartment. You didn’t consider yourself to be one of those douchey vinyl connoisseurs, but you liked the place well enough. It was only a matter of time before you noticed the tall, dark, handsome boy who’d frequent the place without buying anything. He’d stick to the Industrial Rock or Post-Punk ailes and he definitely looked the type, decked head to toe in grungey black attire, adorned with silver jewelry and chains. Every so often the two of you would lock eyes, make slightly painful small talk about whatever was playing through the speakers. You even inquired once if he’d learned your shift schedule with how often he’d appear when you were working, and, leaning suavely on his elbows before you, he’d replied:

“Maybe I have. Maybe I haven’t. That all depends...would you think I was a creep if I said yes?”

Perhaps a normal individual would confirm this, but you had to admit the guy was cute. Okay, he was hot with his dark eyes lined in black, brow piercing and air of confidence. So you smiled and shook your head. Dio smiled back.

You recall during one of your early morning shifts, Dio asked for your coffee order, motioning to the cup in your hands. You gave it to him and he advised against grabbing your morning coffee the next time it was scheduled on your calendar. With curiosity, you obliged and on that day and each day after, in he strolled with your cup in one hand, his in the other. So you carried on like that for a while, chatting over coffee, much to the dismay of your manager.

“Your boyfriend’s a distraction,” she’d remarked one day. “And a loiterer. I don’t care how dreamy he is, he can’t keep hanging around here if he’s not gonna buy anything.”

Admittedly, that caused your heart to sink a little. Yeah, you understood her frustration from a business perspective, but despite not even knowing this guy’s name, his gloomy presence brightened your otherwise dull work days.

When you transferred your manager’s message, Dio issued a breath of...disappointment?

“I don’t believe in money,” came his confession, almost hardly classifying as one what with how casually it was delivered. He chuckled at your raised brow. “Everyone’s a slave to these meaningless pieces of paper and metal, even you. ” A nail painted black pointed at you. “If I want something, nine times outta ten, I’ll find my own way to get it. Seems a little fucked up to work for the essentials for survival, don’t you think?”

For a moment, you sat with this new information. Yeah, it was a little fucked up to fork over hard-earned cash for things like basic needs, but how else was someone expected to live? Mulling it over, you sipped your coffee, once again brought by him. You shot Mr. No-Name-Kid a knowing look. “Am I drinking stolen coffee?” Your smirk couldn’t hide from him.

Dio only laughed.

One night as you closed up shop, you were disheartened at the absence of a certain trench coat clad “customer” in the store that day. You couldn’t place where this was coming from. After all, the two of you were only..what? Acquaintances at most? Names hadn’t even been exchanged, and yet you found yourself scanning the streets outside for any sight of him at the door; reminded of his face when bands like The Cure filled the shop.

Your sigh deflated you as you dug for your keys in your bag -- both to lock up and for your car. It was whatever. This guy had a life too and was under no obligation to visit you as you worked.  You turned the key to Empire Records, locking it shut and gave the doors a pull to be sure, Yup. All good. Nodding to yourself, you turned to locate your car in the lot next door. The night was brisk, pushing past the fabric of your cardigan as you walked an empty sidewalk. Under the glow of buzzing streetlights and neon business signs, you tugged it closer to you. The work day was dwindling, at least on this street, cars every so often rolling past. You’re about halfway to the car park when your ears catch a second pair of footsteps behind you. Your lips and spirits lift with the hope that they might belong to the heavy boots of Dio after all and you turn to greet him.

“Nice night, huh?”

This guy’s not Dio. His hoodie covers shaggy chestnut hair, hands in his front pocket as he trudges along. This dude reeks of weed and booze. You ignore him and continue on your path.

“Not a talker. Got it. Listen, honey, you don’t gotta clam up around me, I’m a swell guy. I’ll walk ya’ to your car, that’s where you’re goin’, right?”

Jaw clenched, you ball your cool hands into fists at your sides, keeping your car key poking out from between your fingers should this douche not get the hint. “I don’t need an escort, thanks.” Your reply is sharp, eyes remaining en route. Other than that, you try your damndest to ease calm through your body. Tempting as it is to dash to the safety of your vehicle, you’re not about to put any fear on display for him. You’re okay. Breathe. The lot’s less than a block away now.

Then a hand snakes its way around your waist.

“C’mon, baby, ‘m just tryn’a be a gentleman. Isn’t that what broads want?” His breath is rancid in your nose.

You jerk away, shooting daggers. “Offer declined, now leave me alone.” Now you pick up the pace with your destination in sight. You don’t make it far before you’re jerked back by fingers at your forearm that tug forcefully. The bastard opens his mouth to spew more drovel, but you don’t give him the chance to speak. Screwing up your face, you reel your arm back and jab him with your key in the ribs.

Pain sputters through his lips. No skin was broken (unfortunately), but he’s stumbled back a few paces and grabs where you’d struck him. “You bitch!” He spits, his glare glassy. “Fuck’s your problem?!”

You’re halted by a chilling mixture of fear and shock at your own actions, snapping out of it when the drunk stranger lunges forward. No time is wasted in absolutely fucking booking it now. He may be hammered, but you’re taking no chances. You pay no attention to the string of swears and slurs from behind you and finally reach your car. The vibrations in your hands make unlocking the door difficult, and glancing up you can see your pursuer drunkenly heading toward you.

“Fuck!” You cry. “Stupid fucking--!”

“If I were you I’d stop right there, you piece of shit.”

The familiar voice that hadn’t been there prior snaps your head up, scanning the darkness to catch Dio crossing the street looking more menacing than you’ve ever seen him. You could get in your car and peel out of there right now, but you’re frozen in place watching the scene unfold.

Your attacker finds his way to his feet again, looking dumbfounded at the character who’s walked onto the scene. “Who -- who the fuck’re you?!”

You catch a smirk on Dio’s lips under flickering streetlights. “That all depends on what your next move is, jagoff.” He looks pissed as all hell, though there’s a layer of calm to his words that stirs your stomach. Dio now stands in front of the other with his hands in leather pockets, like he’s provoking him. He’s always exuded this...intimidating aura, clad in all black and chains but you’ve never seen this side of him in action. Maybe now is a bad time to come to this realization, but you have to admit: it’s sexy.

“Oh that’s, ‘s cute,” Mumbles the brunette guy, snickering. “‘S this your boyfriend comin’ to the rescue? Looks like a fuckin’ faggot if I’ve ever seen--”

Dio’s boot to this guy’s crotch cuts him off in the middle of his “insult” and he crumples to the concrete with a groan; if that isn’t enough, Dio lands a second kick to his temple.

You can only stand there lamely with your jaw agape and watch him swagger over after he just knocked a dude in the nuts.

“Sorry I was late,” he says smoothly. “I was in a meeting. You alright?”

Stupidly, you blink at him in the low light. “I--um...I’m…” Real nice. You shake your head to jumpstart your brain. “Yeah, I-I’m okay. I’m good. Thanks. Really.” So he’d come to see you after all.

Dio nods, appearing grateful to hear you’re unharmed.

You two begin to speak at the same time and chuckle in unison. He falls silent, ushering you to continue. You look your rescuer in the face, unable to swallow a smile. You’d missed those eyes, seeming so warm in the cool of the night. “So, do I get to know the name of my savior?” You prod.

He laughs once, low in his throat. “Dio.”

[kitkat4406]

TW- the homophobic f slur, homophobia in general, racism, a swear

Pairings- Platonic Virgil and Remus

Part five > Part seven

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Remus whispered, fixing his hair that showed under his beanie. Virgil laughed lightly.

“Yes, it's just a small lunch date, there's nothing to worry about, I'll meet him with you and then I'll head off so you can go to lunch in peace,” Virgil said, fixing Remus’ collar of his plaid shirt. “Just calm down, it's going to be okay” Remus stared at him in the mirror.

“You're telling me to calm down.” Remus muttered, stepping away from the mirror and slipping his shoes on. “Look, I’m just nervous, okay? He ghosted me all day yesterday then just randomly said let's go out for lunch” Virgil smiled reassuringly, patting his shoulder.

“Remus, I’ll be with you for the first like, ten minutes. If he seems like bad news i'll get you outta there, I promise” Remus sighed, nodding.

“I know you will, I again.. Just worry” The two came to a comfortable silence, before Remus almost jumped out of his skin when his phone went off.

“Who is it?” Remus showed the phone to Virgil, nervousness rolling off Remus in waves. “He just wants to make sure you can make it dork,” Virgil laughed lightly. “Just saying that he wants to meet in the park you two went for a walk in” Remus said oh softly, nodding.

“We should get going then shouldn’t we…” Virgil hummed, grabbing the bag he had brought over.

“Yeah, it's a bit of a walk isn’t it?” Remus nodded, putting his phone into his pocket and following after Virgil.

“I don't want to keep him waiting, ' Remus mumbled. Virgil shrugged it off.

“We won't be late”

“We’re late! Awesome, wow! Thanks” Remus muttered bitterly. Virgil groaned.

“I didn't think we were going to be!” Remus looked at him exasperated.

“You stopped at a busy coffee shop because you needed tea!” Remus said anxiously, hoping Logan wouldn’t be upset. Remus looked around the park, spotting Logan at a bench reading. Remus bit at his lip, tugging on Virgil's sleeve. “He looks content” Virgil looked at him with an eye roll.

“He’s biting his lip, checking his watch every few seconds, and also, he is looking around not reading” Remus stared at Logan.

“How…” Virgil shrugged.

“I’m engaged to a therapist, Remus. Work it out” Remus shoved him playfully.

“Lets just go over” Logan then looked up, smiling slightly and standing in all his 6’ 8” glory. Virgil blew out a breath.

“Damn,” Virgil muttered. “He’s tall”

“Hello Remus, is this Virgil?” Remus nodded, not finding his voice as always. Virgil cleared his throat.

“Yeah, nice to meet you. I’m Remus’ best friend.” Virgil said, not letting Logan's taller nature affect him unlike Remus. Logan nodded.

“I’m sure you know who I am then” Virgil nodded, looking Logan up and down.

“Lets go have a chat while Remus works through his gay panic.” Logan snorted, while Remus looked at Virgil with an embarrassed whine. Virgil gave a peace sign, grinning before his face fell, looking serious as he talked with Logan. Logan nodded with what Virgil said as Remus attempted to calm down. Remus watched as Logan said a few things, before a serious and grim expression came over his face for half a second. Remus looked away, nerves flooding his veins.

“Remus?” Remus jumped, looking at Logan. He noticed Virgil off to the side thinking, before he nodded and waved by to Remus with a soft ‘your going to be in good hands.’ Remus looked up at Logan.

“Y-Yeah?” He asked, grabbing his shirt sleeve tightly.

“I hope you know I don't mean to hurt you in any way or bring you stress” Logan explained softly. Remus nodded.

“It’s okay, I just worry” Remus said lightly. Logan nodded before clearing his throat.

“I am not… very good at dates and feelings like these, so I hope you will forgive me with any mistakes I may make,” Logan said with a soft nod. Remus nodded.

“It’s okay, I’m not the best at saying how I’m feeling so its going to take a lot of communication on both ends,'' Remus said lightly. Logan hummed, the two falling silent before Logan cleared his throat.

“Well, we should go to our lunch now, yes?” Remus nodded, following after Logan.

The two talked and walked for awhile, before Remus very hesitantly touched Logan's hand. Logan hummed, stopping what he said and looking down at Remus, offering his hand. Remus shyly took it, smiling nervously as many thoughts filled his head. Was he holding his hand too tight? To light? Was he holding Logans hand right? Was his hand sweaty?

“Get a room you faggots!” Remus flinched, dropping Logan's hand and falling behind. Remus didn't notice Logan's eyes fill with rage, or how Logan seemed to examine the girl before his eyes narrowed.

“Last I knew, what me and my date did was none of your business” The girl rolled her eyes.

“Get out of America, I don't know where you’re from, but I know that you should go back” The girl hissed at Remus. His family was from Ecuador, yes, but he had been here since he was a year old. Remus shook his head, quickly walking away with Logan. Logan glanced back at the girl, before looking down at Remus.

“Are you okay Remus?” Logan asked kindly. Remus nodded.

“It happens all the time” Remus muttered bitterly. Logan shook his head.

“I apologize for that then Remus, you shouldn’t have to deal with it” Remus shrugged.

“Lets just get to our lunch thing” Remus mumbled, not taking Logans offered hand, even if he wanted to. Logan nodded with a slightly hurt expression, dropping his hand again.

“We’re just going to a restaurant I used to frequent, the food is very good in my opinion” Logan explained as they turned a corner. “They’re very friendly people too” Remus nodded, looking around the street, looking at the only restaurant around.

“That one?” Remus asked, pointing towards it. Logan nodded.

“Indeed it is” Logan said with a soft smile, crossing the street with Remus.

“That was a very good lunch,” Remus said with a grin. “It tasted like home cooking,” Remus laughed. Logan hummed with a smile.

“I happen to agree,” Logan nodded. “Now, should we go back to the park?” Remus hummed, nodding.

“I should probably get back to writing, my boss is on my ass again about getting this book out '' Remus said off handedly.

“I thought you were an author, not a newspaper editor or something” Logan said with a confused tone. Remus nodded.

“Exactly, I’m an author meaning I shouldn’t have any due date. God, I wish my boss just conveniently stopped existing sometimes” Remus laughed. Logan nodded.

“What’s his name?” Remus looked up at Logan.

“Why?” He asked with a light smile. “You gonna take him out for me or something?” He laughed.

“Sure” Logan shrugged, seemingly completely serious. Remus giggled.

“You're funny Lo, but no, he is normally a really cool guy, but his family is in a rough patch from what I know. I'll be fine” Remus grinned, taking Logan's hand with hesitation. Logan smiled, holding his hand.

“Okay, I suppose nothing will happen.” Remus laughed.

“Silly goose” Remus said, smiling up at Logan. Logan smiled at him too, before looking back up to make sure the two didn't run into anything.

[curly-bangtan]

Heatwave Drabble #1: That Night in Mykonos

[Heatwave // Godless] [Drabble Masterlist]

Pairing: Taehyung x reader

Summary: That one not-so-forgotten filthy drunken night in Mykonos that you and Taehyung never speak about again. For good reason.

Genre: drabble, smut

Warnings: unprotected sex (don’t do it), beach sex, oral (m/f), taehyung’s tongue technology, dom!Tae, daddy kink, exhibitionism kink, facial (lol oop), cumplay, spanking, degradation if you count slapping your face with his dick, may make you fall in love with this couple even more soz

Word count: 6k (why am i incapable of making even a drabble short and quick?)

A/N: As per highly requested… :) If you’ve randomly stumbled upon this, definitely read Heatwave first to understand the plot.

.

The gentle washing of the waves sings a lullaby to your ears. You have always loved the sound of the ocean, so serene, yet holding so much power. Wiggling your toes, you watch the minute grains of sand trickle off your feet like a waterfall. Nonchalant, you take a swig of cider, its fruity acidity burning a bittersweet trail down your throat.

‘Man, I fucking love Mykonos.’ Taehyung slurs beside you, tipsy from his fourth bottle of beer he’s clutching like a trophy.

‘Thank you again for bringing me here, Taehyung.’

The two of you are sat on a towel by the beach, watching the moon paint its own reflection in the water. Sky crystal clear, as it is every single night here in Greece, the constellations hanging over your heads set a tranquil tone to the last evening of your trip.

‘Hey, what did I say? Stop thanking me. Now you have to finish your drink.’ Playfully, he flicks the tip of your nose in reprimand.

Grinning, you roll your eyes but follow his stupid rule. Not that you can’t hold your liquor, but this is your seventh drink, and you’re starting to feel it pulsating up to your head.

‘No, but you were right.’ Words tumble out of his pretty lips that you can’t help but admire. ‘It was a good call not to go out tonight. If we actually went hard at VOID, our flight tomorrow would be hell.’ He is referring to the club you have been religiously visiting almost every night this week. ‘This is much better. Nice and chill.’

With a mighty sigh, he falls onto his back, head hitting the edge of the towel, narrowly missing sand invasion in his hair. Rolling your empty bottle away, you join beside him.

‘This has to be the weirdest but also best holiday of my life.’ You ruminate. The stars are shining particularly bright tonight, you wonder if they know it’s your last night here and want to bid farewell.

The chesty chuckle Taehyung lets out reverberates into you. ‘Definitely the weirdest.’ He turns his head to face you. ‘I can’t believe I’m in Mykonos with this random chick I met in the club, who offered to rent me her place, so I guess she’s now my roommate, when this whole trip was planned to be a surprise for my girlfriend who had been cheating on me for months.’

Taehyung is especially chatty and vivacious when drunk, you’ve noticed from the past few days. Normally he’s laid back, spaced out even. But give him some booze, and all his emotions and thoughts cartwheel out of him. Though you’re only beginning to know him, he’s immensely interesting, you can tell he holds so many layers to him that requires inquisition over time.

‘Wow, random chick from the club? Bitch, you ripped out my hair.’ You laugh and smack at his chest, hand lingering for a little too long.

Wait, chest smack? Why are you using your classic move on him?

You’re a flirt, you can’t help it. The cider’s doing its thing, you guess.

‘Man, I’m so sorry about that, you have no idea how awful I felt.’ He inches closer to you until his head is rested upon your shoulder. Right, he’s also especially touchy when drunk. Anyone who walks past right now could mistaken you as close friends, when in reality, you’ve known each other no more than a month.

To be completely fair, you have spent everyday of this said month together since that club night, helping him move in and unpack, and now travelling together. You guess you’re kind of friends now.

‘These past few weeks have been so crazy. I was just trying to have a good night out when a wild Kim Taehyung appeared and somersaulted into my life. And now we’re lying by the Mediterrenean sea together, tanned and drunk.’ His hair is tickling your neck so you push it away. Your fingers brush against his forehead and he hums at the contact.

‘But hey, on a serious note, hand on heart,’ Taehyung gazes up at you, ‘I’m so glad I got to do this with you. You are one of the coolest people I know, and I wouldn’t have wanted to come here with anyone else. Not like I have anyone else right now… My ex can go fuck herself, or fuck Jimin. I have a bigger dick anyway.’

You sit up, choking on your laughter. Out of the blue, he’ll always hit you with these one-liners that are absolutely pure gold. ‘Okay, Mr. I’ve-Fucked-Nine-Girls-This-Week.’

Pride beaming from his smile, he tugs you back down beside him. ‘Hey, I was in a relationship for three years, I need this. Miss I-Had-A-Threesome-With-Two-Guys-On-Our-First-Night.’

The two of you splutter your drunken giggles. The two guys were Italian, come on, how could you have passed up on the opportunity?

Despite the time of evening, the breezes that gust pass are humid. The temperature is perfect, actually, no sun blazing down to melt you into puddles. You’re probably too drunk to appreciate this moment but one day you’ll look back at this night cherishingly, you hope.

‘You’re right. I’m glad I came with you, Taehyung.’ It’s your turn to look at him. ‘I’ll get such an earful from Lotta when I get back but it’s all worth it. I can’t believe we got away with half of the things that we did!’

‘I know right?’ His arm feels particularly warm against you. It may be the alcohol working its magic but his voice sounds so deep and mellow tonight, like dark chocolate dissolving in your mouth. ‘The way they upgraded our room to a premium when we pretended to be a couple on our honeymoon.’

The memory is fuzzy but fond in your inebriated mind. ‘You’re welcome. I’m a master bullshitter.’

‘We even got that couple’s spa treatment and free wine and dine night.’

To be completely honest, it wasn’t difficult pretending to be loved up newly-weds. A lot of that affection you were displaying towards Taehyung wasn’t fake; he’s this perfect specimen of a man, gorgeous face, toned body, captivating personality, quirky humour - anyone’s dream boyfriend, really. You’ve tried to tone your attraction to him down, you can’t be lusting over your new roommate after all. Things would get too messy. But it was just for fun anyway, there’s no harm in a few pretend embraces and neck kisses to get those couple’s perks.

You’re just friends.

Though a part of you envies the nine girls he’s slept with this holiday, because you’ve seen the outline of his bulge in his swim trunks and Holy Shit… But as much as you like to fuck around, there’s a clear line that separates roommates and guys you bang. Those are two mutually exclusive groups of people in your life, the Venn Diagram does not intersect.

‘Hey, you wanna go for one last swim?’ You’re pulled from your thoughts by Taehyung’s suggestion.

It’s a bad idea, swimming this late at night, having downed a few bottles. But when has your inner conscience ever stopped you from doing what you want?

‘’Course.’ He is already removing his shirt as he stands, and you can all but ogle at the muscle of his moonlit back as you reply.

Following his action, you turn away from him and peel off your shorts that have stuck to your skin from sitting for so long. Are you perhaps trying to tempt him with the view of your bent over ass? Hmm, possibly… He does pay an awful lot of attention to your rear every time you wear these shorts... Carelessly flinging your top onto the rest of your things, you spy him staring at you in your periphery, hands stuffed into his shorts pockets. You adjust the pad of your bikini top, perhaps more dramatic than you needed to.

A smirk plays at your mouth. Why are you trying to get his attention?

Feet sinking into the soft sand, you pad after him towards the calm beckoning water. Your head is feeling hazy from the ciders, and when you spot the lazy smile he’s wearing, you know it’s hitting him too. Gazing up at the moon, you realise you feel blue. Not blue in a sad melancholic sense. But blue as in cool, relaxed, heart-at-peace blue; you’re going for one last night swim in the most beautiful country with your handsome new roommate, blue. A hint of romantic lyricism. Maybe.

‘I’m really gonna mis- Taehyung!’ You screech into the quiet night when he all of a sudden picks you up and carries you bridal-style into the sea.

And tosses you into the water.

Arms flailing midair, you’re catapulted into the waves like a pebble. The cold hits your curled spine first, harsh and shocking. Then it detonates within you, a volcano of ice numbing all your senses and aching your bones.

When you find your bearings and gasp up for air, you see him, ocean up to his knees, head whipped back in laughter, clutching his tensing core, eyes pinched into crescents as the most warming sound leaves his mouth.

‘You piece of shit!’ You lunge for him, but your limbs feel heavy in the water, restricting the power of your attack that he dodges so effortlessly.

But you don’t give up so easily. Tide washing you towards him, you launch yourself again, saltine droplets splattering all over his face. Resigning, Taehyung lets you drag him by the hand away from the shore, waddling clumsily against the stubborn current that’s determined to push you back to the beach.

‘Dick and balls, it’s freezing.’ He heaves.

‘Wuss. You’re not the one who got dunked.’ The chill is licking at your skin, seeping into your hair that splays out in floating silk tendrils. You’ve stopped walking on the sand now, instead spreading onto your front and allowing your swimming arms and paddling legs to move you.

Water up to his chest, you see the goosebumps rise on his blue-bronze unsullied skin, star-freckled sea reflecting wavering diamond silhouettes onto his chiseled front. Following the defined protrusion of his salient collarbones, then the sleek inward curve of his neck, your gaze arrives at his face. His strong brow never fails to strike you; tongue loitering out between his folded lips; brown tufts of salt-kissed, breeze-licked hair a mess but a masterpiece still. Eyes painted with a warm summer glimmer, sapphire and still, he observes you from where he stands.

The fluttering in your heart is now indistinguishable from your shivering due to the wet cold.

‘Come on, let’s swim out a bit further.’ He nods to the open ocean, refusing to spare you from his pinning stare.

Body heavy from the alcohol, the cold and simply your lethargism, you dive below the surface. With your water-blurred vision, you swim after his slow walking legs, bubbles you release tickling your face. You grapple onto his ankle, hear his muffled yelp and stifle a mischievous giggle.

Launching off the sand bed, you lurch up to the surface, inhaling sharply at your first breath of air. You push your hair back to see Taehyung regard you with a mystical expression.

‘It’s too deep here,’ you whine, ‘I can’t touch the floor.’ Not particularly athletic, treading water in order to stay afloat is wearing you down.

‘Hold on to me then, midget.’ He chuckles and holds out his hand which you quickly grab onto. With the stability he provides, you pull yourself up his arm like a buoy line and perch your elbow on his shoulder.

Which draws you unexpectedly close to his face. Nose mere inches from his chin. You smell his familiar honey musk.

Unfazed by your proximity, his arm circles behind you before landing one your waist, the warmth of his touch blooming like flowers on your skin. Why does his hand feel so nice on you? Why can’t you stop staring at him?

‘Better?’ Vibrations of his throat hum into your core.

‘Thanks.’ Your poise on his shoulder is sliding so you snake your arm around his neck, hoisting your body up against his. The contact snaps a cord inside you, sensation of him tingling everywhere you touch.

‘You’re such a little princess.’ He rolls his eyes theatrically in feign mockery, but his smirk betrays his mirth.

‘Shut up, you love it.’ This playful banter weighs heavy in your chest, constricting it, winding it. Because if it were anybody else, it would be flirting... Or maybe you are flirting with him right now. You’re not sure anymore.

A droplet of water is trickling along the edge of his jaw, your focus is transfixed at its smooth descent to his chin. Your bodies are bobbing with the calm waves, up, down, up, down. Then your eyes lock and-

Fuck.

You want him.

You really fucking want him.

Right now.

Right here.

Taehyung’s glare sears a mark in you, and it’s burning like the flames of hell all the way down to your sex. With the side of his finger, he doesn’t need to so much as touch you to tip your head up his way because that’s how willing you are. One tilt, that’s all it takes to kiss him right now. His fingers are sinking into your tender waist, and immediately you wonder how they must feel inside you.

‘I do love it.’ He slides his cheek against yours and traces the bridge of your nose with the tip of his.

And then.

You taste the sea on his lips, salt and cold. It feels like diving into the ocean, plunging into the deep blue and simply allowing your body to be swept away. His kiss is greedy, hungry, willing you to submit to him and follow his lead. And in your intoxicated state, you do so.

Legs wrapping around his torso in the water, his hands caress up your thighs to your ass, digging into your plump flesh with an ardour that releases a damp arousal from your slit. Your own fingers grope down his chest and toy with his hair, scratching and tugging. When he nibbles on your bottom lip and you know that you’re done for. You melt like putty in his control, meeting his tongue with a soft obedience you don’t normally exert.

‘Taehyung.’ You gasp into his mouth.

‘I’m all yours tonight, baby.’ is all he says before diving back into you. Those words sends the possessive animal in your mind wild with satisfaction. Because yes, he better fucking be all yours tonight.

Kissing Taehyung feels different. Perhaps it’s because of the build up of tension you have been harbouring these past few days. Or maybe it’s the thrill of knowing that you shouldn’t be doing this, the thrill of doing the forbidden. Or rather, it’s the way he wields his dominance over you so ferally and fervently, like he’s been waiting for as long as you have to do this.

Kissing Taehyung is teeth and tongue.

Kissing Taehyung is salt and the midnight breeze.

Kissing Taehyung is blue. The kind of blue you see only in the hottest of flames.

When you feel his stiff length poke underneath you, your cunt is set ablaze with desire. Desire to sink down onto him this instant and have him pound into you amidst the ocean until you both feel faint. Desire for him to break you in half with all his might, make your eyes water with from the pleasure he stabs into you.

Slowly he begins to walk you back to the shore, gripping your legs around his waist as you lock your arms around his neck. Lips never leaving each other longer than a second to breathe.

His ravenous mouth travels down to your breasts, and he doesn’t hesitate to devour them from your bathing suit, suckling angry red marks down your cleavage and around your nipples. Though clothed, the prominence of his cock burrows between your wide open entrance, rubbing against your bikini-clad clit and making you thrust your hips further into him.

Feverish from his touch, you don’t realise you’re on land until he gently falls onto his knees and carefully places you on the towels below him. Too drunk to even care if anyone else is on the beach, not that there was before you got in the water, you pull him by the neck onto you.

As he kisses a torching trail down your wet body, your mind is somewhere else, in a heaven that worships Taehyung. Hands kneading your exposed breasts, the wisp of his breath tingles down your navel, tying a knot in your core. With his teeth, he obscenely tugs loose the string that ties your bikini bottom together. The fabric falls loose lifelessly, revealing your soaking cunt, shimmering with want for him.

‘So wet.’ He muses as he kisses your pelvic bone, finger stroking up your slick to gather the liquid of your arousal. Then he prods his finger into your mouth, your tongue compliantly lapping up your own taste, salty from the sea. ‘Who made you this wet?’

‘You.’ You’re practically pleading as he sucks viciously at your inner thigh, so close to your weeping pussy.

‘I want you to call me daddy.’

You stiffen under him. Daddy. He wants you to call him daddy. Oh, but of course Taehyung has a daddy kink. It’s so ridiculously characteristic now that he has revealed it, that if you aren’t drunk, you would be rolling your eyes and laughing.

‘Fine, daddy.’ There’s an undertone of travesty to your reply. Whether he notices, he doesn’t show as he kisses closer and closer to your slit.

At the first contact of his lips to your clit, your hips buckle upwards and fingers fly to entangle his hair. Sucking harshly on your sensitive bud, all you’re capable of is squirming and writhing underneath him like a possessed body. The sensation of his mouth sucking on your succulence sends a shot of ecstasy down your quaking legs. Your head feels dizzy.

‘Fuck!’ You whine.

‘You like that, baby?’ When he looks up at you, wet smirk on his lips breathing hot air into your cunt, a coil winds in your stomach.

‘Yes, daddy.’ Your grip on his hair tightens.

Then he’s gorging you like a feast, tongue fluttering on your swollen bundle of nerves, your kryptonite, teeth scraping along your folds seductively. After several licks of your entrance, he pushes not one, but two digits into your cunt. They ease in, lubricated by your moist walls that welcome the pressure of his intrusion into you like the open sea. He draws wide circles inside you, and it feels like your innards are being stirred to perfection by a metal rod. In the meantime, his assault on your clit does not falter, rhythmically hitting his tongue against you, allowing the vibrations of his humming to penetrate your core.

Looking down, this is simply the most beautiful sight you’ve ever witnessed. Taehyung, eyes glimpsing up at you hungrily, face buried nose-deep in your pussy, hands gripping under your thighs that are rested on his shoulders, all the while the moon shines its ethereal glow onto you and the iridescent ocean in the background plays a symphony harmonious to your moans and his filthy slurps.

Suddenly, an explosion of pleasure arrives at your clit. ‘Oh, fuck yes!’ You screech, throat raw from the pure elation that washes over you. The throbbing in your cunt releases at his continuous friction, pulsating so wildly you think you will burst. His fingers pump out your high as he sucks one last time, long and hard, on your beating clit. ‘Ah… Oh my god… Taehyung…’

Finally he emerges from between your legs to breathe. You watch as your fluid dribble down his chin lewdly, your thumb swipes to catch the wetness.

‘How was that?’ Untangling his arms from your legs, he walks up on his elbows to meet your lips in a tender kiss.

‘Mind-blowing.’ You utter against his mouth, eyes rolling to the back of your head for dramatic effect. ‘Let’s continue back in our room.’ Quickly you do up your bikini, impatient for more.

Without needing another word, Taehyung sweeps you into his arms, gathers all your belongings and hastily carries you back to your hotel located just a minute away from the beach. Although, it takes much longer than a minute for you to arrive seeing as multiple detours are made along the way, fondling behind a tree, kissing in the elevator and missing your floor.

And when you’re finally in the confines of your room, he pins you to the closed door, not even bothering to switch on the lights, lips latched onto your magnetising neck. Your wrists trapped in his grip against the hard wood, you ache to touch him as his teeth find your earlobe. Nipping at your soft round flesh, a pleasant shock is sent down your spine at the twinge of pain.

‘Daddy…’ You sigh.

He pulls away to stare into your beseeching eyes. ‘What do you want daddy to do to you?’ His voice is a low grumble of dominance, digging its talons into your brain.

‘I want… I want you to fuck me until I cry.’ In the dark of the room, your attention flickers to the moonlit terrace outside. ‘Right on that balcony over there.’

Something in his obsidian eyes ignite at your suggestion. Zealous with lust, he brings you through the glass door that opens to the fresh night. ‘You want me to fuck you right here, baby? For everyone to see?’

Danger lurking one kiss away, you sense the precarious position his sanity is at. So you reach down and grab his hard member over his shorts, and tip his mind to a carnal frenzy.

‘Yes please, daddy.’ The name is the last straw for him. His breath hitches as you tug down his pants and allow his enormous cock to spring free.

Spinning you around roughly, he bends you over onto the rail of the balcony and strips off your swimsuit in one deft gesture. From here, you have an unobstructed view of the coast, lined by bustling bars and closing restaurants. The neighbouring terraces are a metre away, if anyone walks out now, they would horrifically witness Taehyung’s gargantuan length about to drill into you from behind.

Your heart is pounding in excitement of the risk as well as the anticipation of his cock. Not being able to see him, he can thrust into you any moment now, he must be revelling in such control he holds.

Then you feel it, his large round tip pressing against your entrance curiously. Your legs shake expectantly while fresh arousal leaks out of you, mixing with his precum he’s pressing into you. ‘Beg one more time for me.’

Taehyung and his motherfucking ego.

‘Please, daddy.’ Allowing the words to drag out on your tongue, you twist your neck to look at him with wide pleading eyes. He looks like a king, towering over you with this much assertion, relishing in the power he holds above you in this very moment.

‘Good girl.’

Hands holding your hips in place, he slams his tremendous member into your gaping cunt in one forceful plunge. You can’t help but cry out at the sheer stretch of your walls he’s spanning. Holy fuck, he’s so big he makes it feels like your first time.

All you feel at first is an incredible cinching of your core, the ache of him impaling his rigid shaft through the resisting pressure of your vagina. God, is he fucking massive. He seems to know it as well because he gives you a second to adjust to his size, palm scaling smoothly up the hill of your back to gather your hair in his hand like a rein. Then he is pummelling into you, hips slapping against your bottom, ringing such vulgar sounds in your ears. His cock, hard as if carved from marble, piercing through the pain and moulding a thing of sweet sweet pleasure inside you. You grip the rail so tight its edge gouges marks into your skin, your head hung low between your tense arms.

‘Fu-u-u-uckk-k-k-’ He fucks those syllables out of you one by one. At this angle, his cock is curving up the wrong way into you, jabbing at pockets that normally aren’t reached.

A part of your soul is no longer with you, propelled elsewhere by his ceaseless merciless attack on your cunt. Then comes the sting of his palm when he spanks a searing hot mark into your ass cheek. The sharp pain is refreshing alongside the dull ache behind the euphoric throb he is penetrating into you.

‘This fucking ass of yours, baby. Been driving me nuts in those shorts all week.’ Another slap echoes in your ears, and you welcome it by curving your back more to tip your tush higher for him.

‘Daddy, you fuck me so good.’ Playing along with this narrative he’s into, you egg him on further, stroking his ego as your walls are stroking his dick. Because, damn, he is fucking you so good. Pounding into you with such vigour and violence that your folds are beginning to sting.

You’ve reached a point now where you’re no longer intoxicated by alcohol, but more the addictive fumes of him.

Moans that fall from his lips tingle at your clit, which you start to play with to add to your stimulation. Another smack on your ass, this time so surprising that you scream out. ‘Yes, be loud for me. Let everyone hear how good I make you feel.’ He coaxes.

Taehyung begins to slow, which you know is a sign that he’s close but doesn’t want to blow his load yet. He bends over you, your hair still tied around his wrist, and nips at the shell of your ear. You’ve never known your ear to be such an erogenous zone, for when his tongue flickers at your inner shell, a shudder convulses through you. Leaving slobbery kisses down the curve of your shoulder, he slowly pulls out of you.

‘Finish on the bed?’ As Taehyung embraces you from behind, his strong arm comes under your cold lonely breasts that perk up at his attention, his dripping wet cock sitting between your red ass cheeks. The hum of his deep rasp on your neck sends your head lolling back onto his sweat-dotted chest.

‘Sure.’ What leaves you is a mere huff, you can’t even conjure your voice.

His lips seal yours as he walks you back into the room, leaving the glass door open for the night breeze to grace you. Amidst the savage sex, you treasure such a soft, delicate moment on your tongue, delighting in the way the tips of his fingers trace up your side. When his hand slithers up to your face, you melt into the warm flesh of his palm, mouth opening up for him to unfurl into.

Then the back of your knees hit the bed, and you know it’s about to begin again. Without breaking the union of your lips, you clamber onto the sheets with his frame hovering over you. Grappling on his neck, you drag Taehyung atop you as your head sinks down onto the plush of the pillow.

He sucks on your plump bottom lip one last time before pulling away. Fluid still profusely oozing out of the slit of his tip, telltale of his concupiscence, he perches between your legs. ‘How do you want it, baby?’ His tone endearing, yet eyes deadly dangerous.

Impatient for him to fill you to the brim again, you lift your both legs up for him to grab and place onto his shoulders. ‘Like this please, daddy.’

That’s all you have to say for him to grunt okay and push deep into you, knees digging into the mattress like lampposts. In this position, his cock reaches your cervix without hindrance, his swollen head slamming into your end every thrust he gives. It’s a different type of ache this time, more acutely targeted at the one sensitive spot inside you. As he continues you thrust into you, bollocks swinging at your ass, a build up of sensitivity gathers at your core.

You feel it approaching, that imminent contortion of your cunt, looming over you, on the brink of toppling your senses.

‘Keep going.’ You whimper, the filthy feeling of his prick hammering so fast into you enough to bring tears to your eyes. You try to keep them open, watch his tongue poke out in concentration as he watches your body quiver under his. But the intensity of his fucking is truly too overwhelming that a single droplet leaks out and flow down your temple.

‘I’m so close.’ Taehyung heaves, pecking the bone of your ankle. Something ruptures within him, his sanity, humanity, and suddenly with an even more arduous determination he drives into your walls like a crazed beast. Sole purpose now to reach the climax awaiting him, he spreads your legs open wide before him and rabidly plunges his twitching prick.

And for the second and third time this night, your orgasm hits you, one immediately followed by the other. ‘Taehyung, I’m-’ You’re a crying thrashing body beneath him, the ecstatic pleasure obliterating your mind into ruins as your cunt erupts. The string of profanities that leave you sound incoherent to your own hearing.

You won’t be able to walk straight tomorrow, you’re sure of it.

Taehyung watches you break on his cock, walls tightening impossibly around him, until only a husk of your being remains.

‘Holy shit, I’m gonna come.’ Frantic with excitement, his hips move sloppily. ‘Where should I come?’

‘All over my face? In my mouth?’ Cupping your breast, you gaze up at him with salacious eyes.

‘Oh my fuck- Yes.’

Yanking himself out, a string of your own release threaded at his tip, he slides himself up the bed until his knees are on either side of your head. Pornographically he slaps his hot length on your cheek several times as you roll out your tongue for him. ‘You like that? You like my dick on your face?’

‘Hmmm.’ You engulf his seeping tip in your ready mouth while he jerks himself off with a teenage boy’s zest, his knuckles hitting at the underside of your chin.

Eager to coax his orgasm, you lick fervently at his sensitive head, right on the patch of skin around his slit that drives every man insane.

‘Oh fuck! Baby-’

Abruptly, he withdraws his cock from your mouth. Not after two strokes, he is shooting hot white spurts of his seed onto your face, your eyes shutting just in time to avoid being fired at. Some of his fluid lands in your mouth, brewing bitterly on your awaiting tongue. Eyes squeezed shut, his cock pulses involuntarily in his hand as he lurches his high to an end.

‘You look so fucking good with my cum all over your face.’ Taehyung stares at his piece of work, splattered across your cheeks, on your forehead, and unfortunately for you, in your hair. Feral demeanour dimming, he leans down and gently smears his ejaculation all over your skin before nudging it into your mouth.

Like his good little baby you are, you swallow it like it’s your milk.

‘Mm…’ Throat hoarse from all the moaning, you suck his taste off his thumb.

Exhaustion dawns over the both of you when the adrenaline drains from your blood. Ache straining between your thighs, you waddle over to the bathroom quickly before him cum dries into a crusty nightmare.

Your sex-ridden, hair-dishevelled, hickey-speckled reflection greets you in the mirror. Realisation of your actions sink into your heart along with the sour taste of guilt.

What the fuck have you done?

You just had the wildest sex with Taehyung, your new roommate.

Taehyung, your new roommate.

Taking a deep breath in and out, you try to form back the logic shattered by his brutal fucking. Why do you have to be the way that you are? Just why are you so incapable of controlling your nymphomania?

‘You okay?’ Taehyung’s bass booms from the bedroom, startling you from your turmoil.

You gave into your temptations. You fucked up.

But this isn’t unsalvageable, you two can recover from it. After all, it’s not like you have been lifelong best friends, you’ve only just met each other, still stepping into deeper stages of your friendship day by day. As long as you don’t let this happen again, stop seeing him in a sexual light, you two should be fine.

Yes, you’ll be fine.

Drying your washed face with a towel, your answer is muffled. ‘Yep, all good.’

When you roam back to the room, you see him sprawled out like a Greek God, still shirtless but now wearing sweatpants that outlines his bulge all too well, bed sheets bunched to the side to aerate his sweat-dampened body. His eyes crawl over your naked form with a thirst that has you willing to drop to your knees and suck him off again. Spoilt in the attention he’s doling you, you climb beside him perhaps too seductively than you should.

Stop. You shouldn’t.

Taehyung doesn’t waste a second to pull you into his chest and smother you with slow, passionate kisses. Such contradiction to his rough handling of you sheer minutes ago. His tongue feels heavier, nicer as it rolls along yours, maybe because you’re now sober, senses no longer dulled by alcohol.

It’s a difficulty to retract from his romantic poet of a mouth whose sole purpose is to entice you into its warm embrace. But you do. ‘Hey… We really shouldn’t have…’ You can’t bring yourself to finish your sentence because you care too much for his feelings to hurt him.

But then the cool nonchalance in his pupils relieve you of your fear. ‘Yeah… Probably not the smartest move.’

His fingers toy fondly with your hair, twirling it like a velvet ribbon. Eyes wide with his boyish innocence, you wonder if this is the same person who was just slapping his dick on your cheek and made you call him daddy. This trip was meant to allow you to understand him better, yet you remain stuck, perhaps more than before, in his enigma.

And you wonder how his girlfriend could ever have sought after anyone else Taehyung is… Well he has just done that…

‘It doesn’t change anything, right? We’re still friends?’ You want to roll out of his clasp yet his arms feel so soft and smooth and perfect to fall asleep in.

‘Of course, Y/N’ From the earnesty in his tone, you know you can trust his word.

To resume your previous playful dynamic, you pinch his nose between your knuckles. ‘Then let go of me, friends don’t cuddle.’

‘Friends do cuddle.’ He frowns, shocked as if you’ve just slapped him across the face with a whole cabbage of kimchi.

‘Uh… No they don’t.’ Repulsed by such affection, you try to wiggle away but he locks his arms around your torso like a vice.

‘I don’t know what kind of friends you’ve had, but you’re stuck with me now and in Taehyung-land: Friends. Cuddle.’ Blowing raspberries on your ticklish neck, he lets you squirm like a fish in attempt to escape his coddling, chest rumbling into your back with laughter. Your squeals of help turn into giggles. Raspberries turn into kisses.

You freeze. ‘Oi, friends don’t kiss friends’ necks.’

‘Come on, we just had sex, let me just kiss you a bit more.’ Watching him pout so babily, your heart squeezes. Fuck. Why is your heart squeezing?

But you kiss his jutted lips, still. Savouring his taste that you know you won’t have the chance to delight in again. ‘Fine, but if you try to kiss me tomorrow, I’ll kick your nuts.’

Taehyung takes that as a green light to use you as a snuggle toy for the rest of the night, mouth gallivanting the ocean that is your skin.

.

07/09/18

© Copyright 2019

.

@shookpreme @taetaeobsessed @tangledsparkles @nonexistentfucks @evilkookie @nbiased95 @shimtatae @taehyungmakesmeoof @itscalledgayhoney @tahaing @deliciouslydisturbed365  @expensive-bangtan-girl @jwlmnbt @herakimkim @dnyad @kaepjjang365 @angelswrld @expensive-bangtan-girl @icyi-sky @gingerpeachtae @taexxxiiaa @spring2787 @monixreal

[richietoaster]

Review/Reaction of IT Chapter Two

Let’s just start right off the bat and let me just say that Bill Hader better get a fucking award for his performance.

Alright. Here we go y’all. im trying to stay in order with what happened but so much happened in the movie that my brain is just all over the place so excuse me while i try to form words

UNDER THE CUT CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS

• first opening scene is a fucking LOT okay like i sobbed my eyes out and it was just not cool. adrian and his boyfriend? CUTE AF. Him getting brutally beat up and then killed by Pennywise while Don just watches? NOT CUTE AF

• Mike is a precious boy and I love him so. He cares about his friends so much holy shit. they all get mad at him for lying to them tho.But he only did it to protect them. Mike knew some SHIT(tm) our boy is so smart?? I’m glad they kept to his original storyline

• Older Bill gave himself so much shit this film and i just felt so bad. like we know it isnt ur fault okay?? We know you loved your brother, stop putting yourself down. also?? him becoming protective over dean? please stop my aching heart. 

• Jessica Chastain owns my whole heart and she can kick my ass anyday. She plays Bev so well and captures young bev’s personality so well. her scene with mrs kersh was very weird. i knew the second she ran naked in the hall i’d be seeing some weird fucking shit okay 

• Jay Ryan could kick me and I would personally thank him like?? wow what a man. He immediately recognizes bev when he first sees her and im just?? im happy. so many hidden new kids on the block reference and it had me fucking rolling in my grave

• JAMES FUCKING RANSONE MY DUDE OH LORD okay listen. he gives off young eddie’s panic and chaotic energy so perfectly i felt like i was watching him as an adult, who just never grew up. I think thats what he was going for honestly. He played eddie SO FUCKING WELL 

• I’m so sad about stan. THats all you need to know okay. I’ll talk about his letter later on in this. Stan deserved better. that’s all. 

• if you are not a fan of vomit you’re not gonna enjoy richie tozier. literally any time something bad happens hes just like ah shit here we go again *vomits* and honestly? that made me laugh. like hes just like oh shit something is happening let.. let me just.. no no its fine guys ill catch up.. EHBWFIJHDFSIJ no okay but bill hader stole the fucking show. his acting was phenomenal and,, again,, i’ll add more onto that later. 

• richie scares the shit out of dean. because he thinks hes pennywise. but can you blame him? the kid just. stared at him all creepy and shit. but its so funny. the losers make fun of him bc he doesnt know his own lines from his acts and richies just like “I dont write my own material” and eddies just like “I KNEW IT! I FUCKING KNEW IT” dead. goodbye.

• Young losers were still my favorite part honestly. Eddie kept bouncing that stupid ball in stan’s face in the clubhouse and i was waiting for him to get punched in the face tbh. That didn’t even seem like eddie, that was Jack’s energy bursting through the seams lmfao

• young eddie runs into a fucking box and shrieks and if that isn’t me idk ewhdfiajksjdoi 

• THE FUCKING. HAMMOCK. SCENE. okay listen to me. thats gay. hammocks are now gay. gays only. gay interacts only. the bickering between reddie had me in TEARS. eddie kept kicking at his face and just?? casually??? lays on him when richie wont move?? 

• stan’s fucking shower cap ehfdiujasdiosa and then richie being like “nobodys afraid of spiders stanley okay” and eddie slowly removes his because he cares what richie thinks more than spiders ok

• a flashback from after they defeated IT in the first move with reddie “eddie youve been gone for 24 hours your face is most likely on a milk carton by now” “shut up richie” 

• yong Richie has me weak af this whole movie, like always. just getting on Eddie’s case. HE PINES SO HARD OH Y GOD Like wow my sweet boy is so fucking in love ouch. which?? BRINGS ME TO MY NEXT POINT??

• THE ARCADE SCENE?? he checks out the kid standing next to him and tries to get him to hang out more and then the other kid tells him to stop being weird because he’s not gay, too, and then uses the F slur. richie was just so hurt. paul bunyun scene happens after that and hes just like “I just shit my pants” and i cried. 

• pennywise screaming “lets play truth or dare, you wouldnt pick truth! you dont want them to know your secret” gave off the same energy as eddie’s leper blowjob scene from the book. same energy. do with that as you will. 

• they had some flashbacks that included pennywise and im not sure if this was before or after they had defeated IT in the first movie but i interpreted it as after and if thats the case... hes supposed to be dead. but now thinking back on it, it was probably just more scenes before they put pennywise to rest for 27 years. 

• young richie went to the kissing bridge after that and we ALL KNOW WHAT HAPPENED THERE. fucking.. r + e :((( although we don’t see him carving the E. but reddie is canon so suck toes antis

• stephen king pretty much being like “I know u and ur endings really do suck” to bill when he comes to buy his bike was so fucking funny. it almost felt like a self insert lmfao. ALSO HIM MAKING BILL PAY 300 BUCKS FOR THE BIKE BC HE KNEW HE COULD AFFORD IT? iconic. 

• richie and eddie opening the door to the dog had me laughing. pennywise was just mocking them at that point. they’d be such good dog dads and now im sad

• i was really confused because they added part of stan’s bar mitzvah?? like it wasn’t even the same from the first movie. like they should’ve just put the deleted scene in from ch. 1 and then added that part. thats one of my very few complaints. im slowly hiding them in here. 

• henry bowers was kinda irrelevant in this honestly but thank you eddie for stabbing him and richie for killing him for trying to kill mike yall heroes 

• BEVS BLOOD SCENE ?? CORRESPONDING WITH BENS BURIED ALIVE SCENE? poetic cinema. 10/10

• the big fight really disappointed me in all honesty. but i think thats because andy said he cut so much from there. i expect it to be better with the director’s cut

• eddie saving richie and then immediately being stabbed by pennywise’s claw? IM DEPRESSED.

• “Rich! rich, i did it! i think i killed him!” Our boy was so happy with himself :( 

• eddie’s last words WERE NOT “i fucked your mom”. he was talking to richie and you can hear them talking while the rest are preparing to end pennywise. so im hoping we get that as a deleted scene. 

• richie goes back to help finish pennywise but when he goes to check on eddie.. he’s dead. ://// and bev is like “richie, come on, honey.. im sorry” and richie does not want to believe him. he grabs and hugs eddie so tight i swear i could feel that hug from the audience. 

• another thing im disappointed in and am sliding in is some of the animations? Like. fucking weird. but okay. luckily i didn’t care too much.  

• THE SOB that richie lets out when he holds eddie really hurt my fucking soul jesus christ just kill me

• the losers try cheering him up after and like. thats their friend too but you can just totally tell he’s crying in a different type of grief. THAT WAS HIS FIRST FUCKING LOVE. 

• they all remember after and thats really important to me okay

• stan writes letters and its spoken outloud while the other losers get little montages of what theyre doing with their life after the battle. Richie goes back to the kissing bridge and recarves- YES RECARVES AND YOU CAN CLEARLY SEE THE E BEFORE HE DOES- he recarves the E and while doing it, stan’s voice says “be proud of who you are” and im fucking cry ibg okay

• in the end, i give this movie a 7/10 rating. although some of the animations were weird and some of the flashbacks had pennywise in it (like hes supposed to be currently dead but ok... maybe nightmares??) the actors were PHENOMENAL and the chemistry between older richie and older eddie made me so happy. my ship is canon. but im still sad about stan and eddies death. 

• ignoring canon in 3.. 2.. 1.. now 

[ironmansuuucks]

Like Father, Like Daughter - Part 3

dewey finn x stark!reader 

bonour mon petite croissants! okay so like this part is vvv different to the other parts and the ending is really rushed so my apologies. there’s pretty much no dewey in this one its all reader and tony because context and story lmao but it is vvv angsty!!!. sooo i hope you enjoy! also, i tagged you guys because yous have read and commented on the last parts and i hope yous are still liking it lmao lotsa love xxxx

Part 1 

Part 2 

words - 1800

warnings - alcohol, mentions on drugs, angst 

“JARVIS, you up?” Tony questioned his AI as he walked back into the workshop. “for you sir, always”. It was dark and cold in Stark Tower. Tony had been footering around with mark 34 all day, non-stop. He had no idea where his daughter was. In fact you hadn’t spoken in days. It broke his heart but he knew that he needed to wait until you were ready to talk, and the fact that you were both as stubborn as each other didn’t help. As he checked his watch he couldn’t believe the time, 3:20 AM. “yeah, now flip it.. uh huh and push the revolvers up.. more to the left” Tony spoke to JARVIS with a holographic model of mark 34’s chest cavity moving around in front of him.

Suddenly his phone began to ring. “send it to voicemail” he quipped at JARVIS, still spinning the holograph, but the AI hastily responded “uh sir, it’s y/n’s mobile that’s calling you”. “what? Where is she?” he replied worriedly. Tony had a secret tracker on your phone for years and you had never noticed. JARVIS checked and replied “she’s in Katie’s bar sir”. Tony furrowed his eyebrows, folding his arms, expecting some drunken call from his daughter about how much she hated him, “ok answer it”. The AI answered the call and all Tony could hear was the loud, muffled music of the bar.

“hey sweetie how you getting on?” he answered the phone condescendingly, preparing for her shouting and swearing. But the voice he was met with was not his daughters. “uh, hey Mr Stark, it’s Peter, y/n’s friend?”. Tony furrowed his eyebrows again, concern building. “oh hey Pete, everything ok?”. Peter paused for a second. “well uh.. no, not really.” Tony’s heart was racing, his mind spinning and coining the worse scenarios. “I think you may need to come pick up y/n. She’s super messed up, worse than I’ve ever seen her.. and she uh.. she was about to buy.. uh cocaine from these random guys on the streets before we stopped her” Peter replied hesitantly. Tony was furious. Who the hell did you think you were and what the fuck did you think you were doing. He had been down this route before and it was one that he struggled to get out of. The rich and famous lifestyle was not an easy ride, but he would die before he let you fuck up as much as he did when he was your age.

Tony darted toward the door, not even lifting his jacket “uh huh kid, keep her at Katie’s bar, I’ll be there in five”. He didn’t even wait to here what peter had to say. He almost ran out to the Mercedes and drove at a speed that was lethal to get his daughter back and safe in his arms.

* * * * * * *

“yeah well fuck off” you shouted at the bouncer as your friends dragged you out of the bar, stumbling into the back of them. You pulled out of Peter’s grip and slid down the wall to sit on the ground. Your head was spinning. You had consumed a destructive amount of alcohol. You put your head in your hands. “ugh I haaaate my liiife” you almost shouted as your friends stood in front of you, patiently waiting for Tony. Peter bent down and rubbed your knee “you’re fine, y/n, everything will be okay”. You sobbed slightly “n-no it won’t Pete, im.. I’m fucked up”.

Just then was when the jet black Mercedes stopped outside of the bar, the door flinging open. You looked up at the sudden noise of the car acceleration, Peter standing up and thanking the lord that Tony was here. You squinted your eyes as someone got out the car, and then the realisation hit “you dicks called my dad?!?!?” you shouted drunkenly at your friends, who stood in silence. “right, come on.. up you get” Tony said as he attempted to pull you to your feet. To be honest, you didn’t want to protest too much. In your head you didn’t have to speak to your dad, you could just go to your own cosy bed, so you let him pull you to your feet, stumbling into him as you did so.

Your friends stood silent, feeling bad, and severely worried about you. “what has she had?” Tony questioned Peter as he put her in to the front seat of the car. “ugh, tequila, jack, vodka.. honestly a mix of everything”. Tony sighed, shutting the door and ignoring your protests from the car. “ok so just about everything she could lay her hands on? You’ll be the death of me kid seriously” Tony spoke as he walked round to get in the car. “Thanks guys, I’ll let you know how she gets on” he thanked your friends as he drove off.

The car ride home was filled with silence. Tony was too angry, and you were too drunk. You stumbled trying to get out of the car and fell on your knees, Tony went round and helped you up, putting your arm around his shoulder, almost carrying you up to the penthouse.

When the elevator dinged, and you both walked into the living room, you pulled yourself away from him “I don’t need your help”. “uh huh, sure you don’t miss independent. If it wasn’t for me you wouldn’t be here”. You rolled your eyes “I’m away to b-bed” you drunkenly began to attempt to walk towards your bedroom but you swayed and fell into one of pillars. Tony crossed his arms and watched you as you slid along the pillar and attempted to walk without it but couldn’t.

“please to god tell me what Peter told me wasn’t true y/n” Tony began, sternly. “w-well I don’t know? How th-the fuck am I supposed to know what peter told you” you snapped, head spinning. Your eyes were closed, head resting against the pillar. “you know damn right what I’m on about y/n. Cocaine? Random guys in the street? I’ll be damned if I let you ruin your life like that.” Tony lectured you as he went to put on the coffee machine. “well you kn-know what they say dad.. like father, li-like daughter right?” you slurred.

That hurt. This was the last thing Tony wanted to happen, for his daughter to end up like him. He had tried his best on his own, and he was so proud of you, but he just didn’t understand. Was it his fault? He walked out of the kitchen area and looked at you. His heart was shattered seeing you like this. His eyebrows were furrowed, and the hurt was seeping out of his eyes. Once you had locked eyes with him you looked away. You knew you were hurting him but you didn’t know how to help yourself.

You started to tear up. All of your emotions coming to fruition. You bounced very lightly against the pillar as tears began to stream down your face. You still couldn’t look at him. “dad.. w-why am I such a f-fuck up”.

This broke Tony’s heart. He instantly came over to you and pulled you into his embrace, tightly. “no- listen y/n. You could never be a fuck up. Look at everything you’ve achieved. I’m so so so incredibly proud of you sweetheart”. You sobbed into his shoulder as he rubbed you’re back. “y/n I just want you to realise your worth. You’re so beautiful and smart and you deserve the world. I hate seeing you try to drown your sorrows every night and bring home these random dudes. I just wish you’d talk to me”. He stroked your hair and kissed the top of your head.

“why don’t we make a coffee, if you can stomach it, we’ll go lay on your bed and you can talk to me if you’d like, or I’ll just lie with you until you fall asleep?” he pulled you off of him but kept you in his arms. You nodded, sniffling.

Tony took you to your room and sat you on the bed, you still being too drunk to function properly on your own, then went and made you both coffee. He came back in and sat it on your bedside table “this should help with the head in the morning”. He then went to the other side of the bed and laid down, “here, come rest your bones next to me”, he opened his arms and gestured for you to go and cuddle into him. You instantly shuffled over and let yourself relax into your dads embrace. You began to sob. Tony ran his hand through your hair.

“dad, I just feel like I’m not good enough” you managed through your sobs. “now what in your damn mind would  make you think that y/N?”

* * * * *

You and Tony spoke all night. It was the first time you had both spoken like that in a long, long time. It broke his heart to hear why you felt the way you did and he would pay endless amount of money, and do anything in the world to help you, but he couldn’t. Eventually you both fell asleep, you had needed to get up a few times to be sick, and your dad was right there for you. He never left your side that night, and hardly slept a wink for fear you would throw up and choke in your sleep.

In the morning you thanked him, and you both made a plan. You had promised you would stop going out as much, and you both promised to spend more time with one another, which meant Tony had to stay out of the workshop more. And as time gradually went on, your relationship got better and better. You would both have coffee in the morning together, you both went to concerts again, and you were both cheeky smart asses to one another. You were a new person. You became more responsible, looked after yourself, stopped hooking up with random guys. You were unrecognisable.

“did you ever get in contact with that guy?” Tony had asked you one day as you were both working on mark 36 in the workshop, “what guy? There was that many” you joked. Tony laughed lightly, “no the one who uh, liked all the guitars remember? Had the cool ACDC t-shirt on?”. Dewey Finn. Suddenly you were taken back. Where the hell was he now? It must have been 4 months since that one night, but you would never forget it. That was one of the best nights of your life. “uh, no.. I don’t know if he would want to meet up really, given the circumstances. He probably hates me”.

But little did you know..

tags: @large-unit​ @little-miss-shy-goth​ @paxenera​ @heknowshisherbs​ @thewolfisapartofmysoul​

[sombreboy]

Love Maze »8

Previous  » Next Series Masterlist ▎ 18+ ▎ pairing: Taehyung x Jungkook ▎ genre: School AU, crack humor, smut, angst, ETL, slow burn, fluff. ▎ word count: 8.8k ▎ ch.warnings: cursing, use of homophobic slurs (censored), mentions of abusive parents, floooofff

Co-writer: @velvetwicebang ♡♡♡ Banner made by my lovely @ppersonna​ chu chu ♡

The next day came quick enough, Jungkook throwing his backpack over his shoulder before heading to the morning practice. Even if he technically barely got any sleep, he still felt more rested than he's ever been before.

It's crazy what a new relationship does to you.

Jungkook headed down to the locker room, empty as it was due to him being early-- nothing new. He enjoyed the silence, but this time, he wondered when Taehyung would arrive. 

Kooks mind wandered, a small smile on his face as he pulled his hoodie off, digging in his backpack for his Jersey

~

The following morning, Taehyung showed up to school earlier than normal. He didn’t want anyone to question him, even less gawk at him like they did the last time.

So, he figured it’d be best to change into his basketball attire and keep to himself for the first half of the morning. Of course, Jungkook would most likely want an explanation, but Tae had yet to think of one.

Just the thought of that stressed him out.

What could he tell his boyfriend?

Definitely not the truth. At least, not now..

Avoiding eye contact with a few of his peers, Taehyung pushed on the locker room door, not expecting to see anyone else there.

The elder looked bad, more bruises now adorning his face. It seemed like he could never seem to catch a break.

Much to his dismay, Jungkook was there. Tae’s eyes widened, before quickly recollecting himself.

“Before you say anything, I’m fine.” He lied, and maybe it was obvious he was lying. He didn’t want Kook worrying about him.

The smile that had adorned the younger's face quickly faltered when he laid eyes on Taehyung. He looked like absolute shit

"You call that fine? how could that be fine?" Without hesitation, Jungkook drops his water bottle to the floor as he jogs up to Taehyung, his hands immediately reaching out to delicately cup the elders face, guiding it into different angles so that he could examine the bruises. These were new, not at all the old ones because of Ash from the other day.

"What the fuck happened..?" His doe eyes were, indeed, worried-- whether Tae wanted it or not.

“Nothing happened, okay? I just..”

What else could he say to justify himself? Taehyung had nothing.

Jungkook was smart, he’d be able to pick apart his bullshit of an excuse in a second.

“I fell somewhere..”

He dreaded waiting for Kook’s reaction, he knew what he said was stupid,

“I don’t want you worrying about me, alright? I’ll be fine.” The elder smiled, pulling Jungkook close to him by the waist, “Quit frowning so much.. your face is going to stay that way.”

Taehyung teased, hoping to ease the tension for now.

He pressed a soft kiss on Jungkook’s scar, still holding him close.

Jungkooks frown fought the muscles pulling in his face, eventually losing the fight as he couldn't help but smile at how easily he was swooned over and over by Taehyung-- even if it was through a simple kiss on his cheek, and feeling him close.

"Fine," he breathes out, still not completely convinced that it was nothing, however he can tell that Taehyung doesn't want to push it further. And knowing him-- there was no use in trying at this time. 

"Hey, you're here early..." Jungkook's hands settle at the elders waist, memories from last night replaying in his head. He loved this part of his body, the way his waist slightly curved inwards, kooks hands perfectly molded into the dip, "Wanna join me for the warm up?"

The moment Jungkook’s hands moved to his waist, that same submissive, whiny, pathetic Taehyung arose to the surface.

It was insane how much a touch came with so much recollection.

He still had some bruising on his hips, given to him from Kook’s strong hold.

The younger one was buff, there was no doubt about that. Those continuous days at the gym paid off.

At this moment, no matter if he was taller than Jungkook, Taehyung felt incredibly small in his arms. He only towered him by an inch, so there was barely any difference, but still.

“Warm up? My ass still hurts.” Tae threw his head back with a groan, really not looking forward to any future practices.

The elder couldn’t move without a limp, how was he supposed to run across the court?

“Fine. As long as you promise to go easy on me.” Taehyung smirked, pulling away to change out of his clothes and into his Jersey and shorts.

"If I could do it, so can you," Jungkook chuckles, cringing at the memory-- the day after the locker room fuck. He was such a mess at that time, now it's Tae’s turn to run with a sore ass.

He was only kidding though, his genuine care for him slips through as his eyes are fixed on the elder changing, almost dumb looking for how hes not even subtle about his stare in admiration.

"You look pretty."

His eyes rake Taehyung's torso, able to distinguish the bruises caused by himself-- but also noticing the bruises that weren't.

When Taehyung noticed Kook staring at him, he grinned, until he remembered the other bruises painted on by his father.

There was a noticeable splash of dark purple on his stomach, where the man had kicked him before leaving him to bleed on the floor.

Not wanting Jungkook to continue looking at it, Tae quickly threw on his Jersey.

“Thanks..” He smiled, a boxy smile too. Those were rare, but Kook easily brought them out of him, “Now come on, let’s warm up.” Taehyung threw an arm around Jungkook’s shoulder after he put on his shorts, leading them out of the locker room.

It was nice being the only two ones there, quiet, not so much commotion. Sometimes he needed that in his life.

Jungkook must be growing into a man-- because lately all he seems to think about when Taehyung's body is so close, is to touch. Kiss. Even the urge to sink his teeth into the elders skin hits him way too frequently. He was like a source of gravity, a temptation from the devil himself-- and not just indulging in him every second felt like a sin in itself.

And then there was the other feelings; the raw, pure, appreciation for the man. He felt so calm, safe, and happy around him.

The two sides of his love really created a clash. 

Anyway, some running always helps when he needs to clear his mind. As they make it to the court, kook still keeps his hand tightly wrapped around the elders slim waist,

"If you can't run, just jog." Kook reassured, rubbing his large palm on taes side for a moment, eyes glancing over at him with pursed lips, "Or just stretch. You can watch me?"

The elder thought about it for a minute, nodding his head,

“I’ll watch you.” Taehyung hummed, walking next to Jungkook’s side, the word ‘personal space’ so foreign to them. 

What he didn’t know was that Namjoon was standing outside of the practice hall, a smile so big his dimples could be seen. 

What could he say, he was proud.

It was a nice change, not having to break up their arguments anymore. The elder didn’t want to intrude on their time together, so he went down to the locker room.

“Go on, baby. Show me what you’ve got~” Taehyung bit down on his lip, preventing a grin from spreading. He sat down in the middle of the gym, cross legged whilst he watched Jungkook make circles around him, giggling when he’d get a little dizzy.

He liked this, that was for sure.

Jungkook kept shooting glances and silly grins towards taehyung as he ran around the court, shoes squeaking against the floor,

"Taehyungie, do I look cool?" The younger fished for praise, a mischievous smile playing on his bunny like teeth. He kept going for a bit until he decided to make an abrupt turn, instead jogging towards his boyfriend. He slows down, halting in front of him as he gazes down at the elder through his sweaty, dark locks that dangle over his eyes.

Taehyung stood up, fishing for his water bottle before extending it out for Jungkook to take, one hand resting on the younger’s back, “The coolest. After me, of course.” He playfully nudged Kook with his shoulder, about to reward him with an innocent kiss when the rest of their teammates began showing up.

Taehyung made some more room between them, scratching at his nape. He wished they could’ve spent more time alone. 

“I think I’m just gonna sit this one out..” The elder murmured, taking one last look at Jungkook before limping over to the bench, getting greeted by some of the guys.

They asked him about the new bruises, as well as the limp. 

Taehyung lied straight through his teeth, saying that he got in a fight and ‘beat someone’s ass.’

The guys joked about it being a f*ggot, taking into consideration some of Tae’s homophobic remarks in the past.

Taehyung just laughed, like a chameleon blending into its surroundings. 

It was fine, it wasn’t like he actually thought that..

A little bit of acting can’t hurt.

He looked at Jungkook one last time, eyes softening. As long as they didn’t call Kook a f*ggot, he would keep quiet.

Jungkook chugged his water down, eyes following taehyung in confusion, as to why he suddenly distanced himself in the presence of the team-- until the homophobic remarks are echoing, a little confused by why tae would laugh. Maybe kook was just sensitive, but he chose to let it be, a small, cringey smile on his lips at the situation. As long as they didn't keep going on about it-- he would keep quiet.

Jungkook averted the elders eyes during the moment, a bit uncomfortable hearing the words being so casually thrown. Instead, he refocused on stretching a bit before his hyungs will come over to him, catching small glances towards tae.

After stepping into the Gym, Jimin made his way towards Jungkook, a beaming smile on his face remembering yesterday’s events. The shorter would’ve been lying if he said it didn’t make him feel single as fuck..

But, it was okay. His prince or princess charming will come in and sweep him off his feet anytime soon.. at least he hoped.

“Hi Kookie!” Jimin ruffled the other boy’s hair, following his gaze which seemed to lead to Taehyung.

He smirked.

“Looking at your boyfriend?” The elder teased, not knowing how much truth lingered behind his words. The most he knew was that Jungkook and Taehyung liked each other, that’s it.

“Woah, what happened to Tae?” Jimin finally asked in the midst of his stretching, taking notice of Taehyung’s new complexion, dark red with a hint of purple.

Jungkook shrugged at Jimin's questions,

''He got into a fight,'' He wasn't sure what really happened, but it must've been it. What bothers Kook however, is, how did Tae manage to get into a fight from when he dropped kook off at home until the morning? It didn't make sense...

At the mention of 'looking at your boyfriend', Kook wasn't sure if he could expose the fact. The hyungs knew they liked each other, right?

But, he simply decides to avoid the question, finishing his stretching before catching another glance towards Taehyung.

He just wanted this practice over with, so he could spend more time with his new lover.

All Jimin could do was nod, mind wandering back to Taehyung’s ‘delinquent’ years. The latter’s always been someone who kept to himself, but it was in Middle School where a lot of the physical fights began. 

God, the moment Jimin found out was the moment he wanted to beat Tae’s ass. His friend wasn’t violent, he knew that.

Taehyung barely spoke about it, but Jimin was sure that it had something to do with his mother’s death. Not a lot of people knew about this.

“Well, he needs to get that treated before it gets worse.” The elder noted, looking at Taehyung one more time before diving into practice.

After a couple hours of hard work, practice was finally over.

Tae mainly just sat there, staring at Jungkook like a proud boyfriend. Kook was a really hard worker.. It was something that only drew him in even more.

“Fuck, that was tiring.” Yoongi whined, his skin glistening with sweat whilst he changed out of his Basketball attire.

Taehyung didn’t say anything, just waiting for his hyungs and Jungkook to get dressed.

Jungkook wipes his forehead with the sweaty jersey that he’d pulled off his torso, chest heaving as he’s still exhausted from today’s practice. He’d put his everything into it today, he really needed to get all his energy out— so he could manage the rest of the day without being too jittery about his boyfriend.

“Ah, tiring but it felt good.” Kook chimed in before he dug out his clothes to put on.

Quicker than he expected, Taehyung’s sharp eyes enlarged when he looked at the clock.

School was almost out. A few more minutes and he’ll finally be free from the boring lectures and piles of work.

Tae guessed the time ticked by faster than usual because he was doing something he enjoyed. He probably looked like an idiot smiling down at his crotch, texting Jungkook in secrecy.

The boy was a mushy mess..

To: Kook🥴 Don’t take forever this time, I’m gonna give you a ride 😁

The elder pressed send and leaned back in his chair, anxious to hear the familiar bell ring.

Once it did, he was one of the first people to get out of there (per usual). But this time around, Taehyung’s strides were more quick paced.

He wanted to see Jungkook.

The boy waited in the common area, peeking above students’ heads to hopefully catch a glimpse of Kook, rocking on his feet.

Jungkook smiled like a dork when he checked his text. He didn’t reply— he was a rather terrible texter. But the indicator of “read” should be enough.

He strapped his backpack over his shoulder when the familiar bell finally rang, quick on his steps to shuffle through all students to make his way over to the common area, doe eyes searching for Taehyung.

Once he found the familiar face, he also caught a glimpse of another pair of eyes in the crowd. There’s no way he wouldn’t know who those eyes belonged to.

Ash.

Jungkook froze when they made eye contact, however, before he could react, ash had left the area. He didn’t do anything.

Kook was frozen in place, lips slightly agape in shock, momentarily he forgot about his boyfriend waiting for him just a few steps away.

“What’s wrong with you, Kook?” Taehyung playfully nudged Jungkook’s shoulders with his, keeping his hands in the warmth of his pockets despite having the urge to tangle their fingers together.

Too many people around..

“C’mon, let’s go.” Tae swung an arm around the boy’s shoulders, not thinking much of it since he’s seen pairs of friends do the same thing.

As he practically dragged Jungkook towards the exit, Taehyung let out a quiet wince. One of the cuts on his face from his father’s ring stung like hell, small beads of blood oozing from the opening.

If only Tae knew how to bandage himself up properly, this wouldn’t have happened

Taehyung immediately shook his head at the idea of going home, the memories from last night were still too fresh, and apparently so were the cuts and bruises. He didn’t want to risk meeting gazes with his father again, at least not so soon.

What happened last night.. it was new. The most he’s ever endured from the man was a slap on the face, and a lot of mental abuse. But never this..

“I’ll go with you to the store,” Taehyung smiled, shifting his attention to Kook whilst they continued walking to his car, ignoring the injury pricking at his skin.

The elder felt guilty; Jungkook will have to bandage him up again. He should’ve kept his mouth shut and not cared about his father’s toxic decisions. But, he did.

“Then we can hang at your place?” Tae unlocked the doors, sitting on the driver’s seat before turning the key, the somewhat crappy engine starting to run.

Jungkook slumped down in the passenger seat, closing the door with a loud thud. He looks over at Taehyung's face once more, and without thinking his hand reaches out for the elder, as if he wanted to graze his chin with the pads of his fingers,

“Sounds good to me, I really need to patch you up...”

As there were still students around, the sweet gesture Jungkook was offering had the elder turn his head away without thinking, causing kooks hand to stop mid air. He let his hand fall back into his lap, thinking maybe it was too painful for kook to touch him.

“I still don’t get how that even happened?”

“I told you.. I fell.”

Taehyung turned his head back to Jungkook, knowing his excuse was far from believable. But, he had to say something.

And in his mind, something was better than nothing.

He knew he needed to confide in Jungkook some more, but it was hard when Tae couldn’t really admit that to himself. He didn’t want to believe that his only parental figure was an alcoholic, that he didn’t give a shit about him..

It hurt to think of it, much less voice it out loud. Maybe when he, himself, comes to terms with the fact that he basically has no family left, then Taehyung will open up to Jungkook.

Someday..

Not saying another word, Tae drove off to the nearby store.

Like a lost puppy, he followed behind Jungkook, not having any clue where anything was.

“What is it that you need?” The elder asked, letting Kook do his thing while he stayed close, much like a little kid at a store.

Jungkook made his way through the shopping isles, filling up the little basket in his hand with anything from med supplies to some food. He’s been saving up, and he finally could treat himself a little bit.

Well.. he really wanted to treat Taehyung. For dinner. That he’d cook.

Hopefully that wouldn’t be too cheesy.

It wouldn’t be anything too complicated, a simple dinner of rice(the nicer kind!~), meat (a luxury in kooks household), and some sides. Just the thought had kooks mouth watering.

“I’ll patch you up and feed you, is the plan. Sound good?” Kook flashed Taehyung a wide smile, but as soon as his eyes shifted focus on the statures moving further away behind the elder, the same frozen expression from earlier adorned Jungkooks face.

Just, this time, it wasn’t Ash, It was worse.

His parents.

He almost drops his basket, clutching into it before it would slip from his fingers, eyes widening as panic strikes— he needed to get the fuck out.

But all he could do, was to turn his back against them, head hanging low as he struggled to breathe.

Fuck, he hasn’t had an anxiety attack in so long. Why did it have to happen now?

“Yeah, sounds gre— Jungkook?” Taehyung didn’t waste a second before dropping the huge bag of chocolates that he was looking at, settling his hands on the boy’s shoulders as he craned his neck to meet Jungkook’s eye.

“Hey.. what’s wrong?”

Tae’s brows furrowed, worried from the sudden change of attitude.

The younger looked terrified.

“Baby, look at me.” Taehyung whispered so that only Jungkook could hear, gently tilting his chin up with his index finger, “Kook, you’re scaring me.”

The elder wasn’t aware of the pair of strangers behind Jungkook, his only focus being on his boyfriend, as it should be during a time like this one. Tae’s never seen Kook act this way.

Shallow, quick breaths were heaving from Jungkook's chest, his eyes glossed over and blown wide as he stared into Taehyung's eyes. He couldn't get the words out of him even if he tried-- screaming inside of his head to say something.

"Jeon?" A deep voice vibrated a few steps behind Taehyung, the clicking of the man's shoes indicating that he's coming closer.

Jungkooks body was almost shaking at this point, but as soon as his father's voice reached his ears, he stopped. Instead, that face was replaced with a stern expression, jaw clenching as he refused to meet the man's eye.

"Father."

Taehyung didn’t know what to do other than watch the whole thing unfold from the sidelines. 

He stared at the man ahead of them, remembering one of the most shocking words Jungkook had admitted to him the day he took him in. Honestly, with the strong hangover he had, Tae was surprised he still remembered.

But this wasn’t something he could just.. forget. This was huge. Kook’s parents threw him out, for fucks sake. And all because of him..

“Hey.. Jungkook, maybe we should go.” The elder gently tried tugging on the boy’s arm, keeping an eye on his father.

He didn’t want this situation to worsen, it was already uncomfortable enough.

“What, are you not going to greet your own father?” The man stepped closer, a growing frown on his face. He hadn’t seen his son in months, and had honestly hoped that he’d come crawling back to them. But he never did.

Jungkook didn’t say anything, but he could feel the fury build in his body, his biceps clenching as he curled his hands into tight fists.

“And who’s this?” The man clicked his tongue at the sight of taehyung, a small hint of recognition in his eyes, “Ah...” his eyes returned to his son with a mocking grin, “I see. You still haven’t grown up, hm?”

“You know what?” Kook hissed through his teeth, “Go. Fuck. Yourself.” Any moment,, if he wasn’t held by taehyung, he swears he’d end up throwing hands.

The moment the man’s devilish eyes landed on him, Taehyung had trouble staying unbothered. The words that followed after surely weren’t of any help, and Tae wanted to punch that mocking grin off the man’s face.

But, Jungkook’s father wasn’t worth it. He wasn’t worth their patience, nor the commotion.

“Jungkook, let’s go,” Taehyung said more sternly, “He’s not worth our time.”

The elder glared at the man, his grip tightening on Kook’s arm, as if he was afraid that he’d slip away from his hold. His eyes soon landed on Kook’s mother, noticing how she was keeping her distance from the chaos.

‘Pathetic.’ Was all Taehyung could think, internally judging her for keeping quiet in a public place, when she had no trouble screaming at Jungkook inside of the house.

Jungkook eyes flickered towards his passive mother, his expression mixed. He loved his mother— far more than his father. And he knows she loves him, she was there for him. But she’s too devoted to her husband to have a voice of her own, and it hurt their relationship more than anything.

“Yeah..” kook sighed, his heart beating so hard it could burst any moment from the mix of emotions he’s going through. He didn’t relax in Taehyung's hold, but it did help him feel grounded. Collecting himself, his hand moves to wrap around Taehyung's arm, while the other is still holding the shopping basket.

He had nothing else to say to his father, keeping his eyes on his mother as he pulled his boyfriend close with him to head towards the cashier to get what he needed, leaving behind the two people who told him he’d never make it on his own— that nobody would ever want him.

They were wrong. And that’s the biggest victory of them all.

His father was dumbfounded, frowning as he watched his son leave with the very boy he deemed at fault for his sons...difference. He had nothing else to say right now. He’d wait for him to crawl back when his heart was broken and needed money.

He’s sure of it.

Once they stepped back in the safety of his car, that’s when Taehyung turned to look at Jungkook, his vision no longer set on glaring at the boy’s father,

“Are you alright..?” He asked, not really knowing how to confront someone in a situation like this one. It was messy, “He’s a fucking ass, Kook. They don’t deserve you, it’s their loss.”

Taehyung stated, gaze laced with worry as he waited for some sort of reaction, anything to let him know that Jungkook was here with him/, not hung up in the store with his father. Tae knew it wasn’t that easy, though.

He pursed his lips, moving his hand to rest on top of Kook’s, thumb caressing over the skin.

“Come on, let’s go home.”

Taehyung said ‘home’ as if he lived there as well, not fully aware of his own phrasing yet as he started the car.

As it turned out, Jungkook and him did share one common item: Shitty fathers.

Jungkook felt numbed, his head racing to process the situation. His body had gone through probably every single emotion he was possible of having throughout the span of ten minutes.

He glanced over at taehyung when he started the car, focusing entirely on the features of his boyfriend. He was just... everything.

Home? As if all his anxieties were slowly washed away, they were replaced with warmth. 

Jungkook wouldn’t stop looking at the elder, leaning back into his seat with a content smile pulling on his lips, arms crossed over his chest.

“I’m glad that I have you.”

“Okay, this is no excuse for you to be so corny.” Taehyung scrunched up his face in displeasure, acting like he didn’t enjoy Jungkook’s sweet words.

He prayed that the tint of pink dusted over his cheeks didn’t give his obvious acting away, but, his smile surely did.

“I’m..” The elder chuckled, softly squeezing Kook’s thigh. “I’m glad that I have you, too..”

God, Taehyung wished he would have kissed him right there, but he held back. 

It was okay, he’d have plenty of opportunities to kiss Jungkook tonight.

With one last cheeky grin shot at him, Tae drove off to the younger’s apartment, happy that they were out of there once and for all.

Jungkook went back to his old self within the span of the drive home, feeling giddy from Taehyung's words. Never did he ever imagine for this to be his reality. 

But he sure was grateful for it.

As they got out of the car, kook unlocked the door and stepped inside with the elder, making his way to the kitchen to unpack all the groceries on the counter, “Go sit down and I’ll take a look at your face” he glanced over his shoulder as he grabbed the med supplies, “Then I hope you’re hungry,we’re eating good tonight!”

Taehyung did as Jungkook told, plopping down on the couch when— “Fuck..”

For a mere moment, he forgot he was a little sore.

Fuck you, Jeon Jungkook.

With a small grimace, Tae situated himself a little more comfortably, patiently waiting for Kook to join him as he mumbled sour curses under his breath.

“We’re eating out tonight?” Taehyung cocked a brow, looking up at the younger, watching the boy’s every move from his spot on the couch, “I’ll pay.” The elder offered, knowing he had some leftover money left. 

Since Jungkook was his boyfriend and all, Tae wanted to help him. With rent, food, whatever it may be.

Jungkook strolled over with a wide smile before he sat down next to Taehyung, putting the supplies in his lap as he turned his body towards the elders.

“Nope, I’m cooking.” He was excited, raising his eyebrows in a playful manner. Kook loves to cook, and he’s rather decent at it. He just hasn’t been able to show it off because- well, money. 

And he’s never had anybody to cook for.

“Look at me.” He murmurs as he scoots closer, brushing Taehyung's fringe off his face before leaning in to examine the cuts in his skin, “the one on your cheek is deeper than I thought...” he pouted, grabbing a disinfectant pad, “It’ll definitely sting.”

As if it was a natural reaction, Taehyung raised both brows. His mouth went ajar, wondering if he’d heard right.

“You cook?” He questioned, his expression gradually reverting back to normal. Never in a million years did he think that Jungkook would be making him a meal— let alone cook.

Tae was enjoying learning new things about the boy, and he was excited to get a taste of the food.

“You’re pretty, handsome, cute, and talented. What can’t you do, hm?” Taehyung teased, wanting to praise his boyfriend.

Looking at him, Tae slightly tilted his head to the side to give Jungkook a better view of the cut.

He wasn’t looking forward to the stinging part, knowing he was a baby when it came to such things.

“Hey, thanks for taking care of me.” The elder mumbled, trying to stall him. But a bigger part of him truly meant it, and what better occasion to tell Kook rather than now?

''I'm good at everything.'' Jungkook smiled with a spark of mischief in his eyes, but giddy over the praise nonetheless.

He used one hand to gently hold Tae's chin between his fingers, as to hold him in place when he used his other hand to carefully pat the wound, knowing it's gonna sting badly. Kook hisses sympathetically, as if he could also feel the pain when he feels the elder twitching underneath his touch, ''I'll always take care of you, but... I'd prefer if this didn't become a regular thing-- You being wounded, I mean..'''

Taehyung squeezed his eyes shut and clenched his teeth together, gripping onto Jungkook’s thigh to keep himself grounded.

“Fuck..” The elder hissed along with Kook, wanting the initial discomfort to be over immediately. His face was scrunched up into a frown, but slowly, the strong nip began to fade away. 

The muscles on his face soon relaxed, and so did the grasp on the younger boy.

“It won’t become a regular thing.” Taehyung reassured, bringing up his index finger to feel at the cut on his caramel skin, wincing slightly.

Jungkook finished cleaning his boyfriend's wounds, putting the medkit to the side before shuffling closer to the man, softly cupping his jaw to draw him in for a kiss. Nothing feverish about it, just a soft, slow press of his plush lips onto his, humming in content when he feels the warmth.

He withdraws to look at Taehyung, a small smile pulling on his lips,

''Good. I like your face, so I'd like for it to be bruise-free... Now, are you hungry? I'll start cooking.''

The elder happily gave in to the soft kiss, smiling in the midst of it. 

When Jungkook pulls away, Tae’s eyes are still drawn to his lips, licking over his own at the inviting sight. The elder leaned back into the couch, shyly grinning from ear to ear, east to west. He felt much better, lighter, too.

“I’m always hungry!” Taehyung shouted, excitement obvious in his low voice. The latter couldn’t wait to spend a calming evening with Jungkook, eating delicious food (At least gets hoped..), cuddling— maybe watch some TV?

It all sounded like something he’s craving for god knows how long.

“You need any help?”

''You just need to look pretty and keep me company,'' Jungkook chuckled, getting up from the couch. He wanted to do everything, and give Taehyung a chance to just relax--- And he /really/ wanted to do it perfectly for him to eat.

Kook smoothed the pads of his fingers across Tae's jaw in an affectionate manner before turning to walk into the kitchen to prepare a cutting board, shuffling through his drawers for that one knife he likes to use, ''And I don't want you to accidentally cut yourself, you're clumsy!''

“I’m not clumsy.” Taehyung childishly fought back, pushing himself up from the couch before walking over to Jungkook, wrapping his toned arms around the boy’s waist.

“What are you making?” He questioned, chin resting atop Kook’s shoulder whilst he looked down at the different veggies on the cutting board, eyes studying the way Jungkook carefully handled the knife.

Yeah, maybe he was right. Tae would cut himself, he could be a bit lost at times.. and clumsy.

''Ground beef vegetables stir fry, I've been craving it all fucking day..'' Jungkook already felt his mouth watering at the thought, skillfully chopping up the vegetables before he put them momentarily to the side, grabbing the meat to put it in the sizzling pan, all while having his boyfriend sweetly embracing him. 

This was nice. really nice. Jungkook could get  used to this. In reality, he probably already was, he couldnt imagine being without the elder at this point...

''I'll make a lot, so we will definitely end up in a food coma tonight.''

While everything is finally blended together in the pan, he slowly stirs the food, the aroma of the delicious food filling the room.

''It's almost done, so you could go and pick a movie if you'd like? I have a few dvd's by the tv''

Untangling his arms from around Jungkook’s figure, Tae waltzed over to the TV, crouching down to examine the list of DVD’s that ranged from comedy, action, adventure, fantasy— anime.

Yet another thing Taehyung didn’t know about the younger..

He was a fucking weeb.

He couldn’t help but chuckle, fingers brushing over the plastic, trying to see if a cover caught his attention.

“You like anime.” Taehyung asked, but it sounded more like a statement than anything. 

“Spirited Away? What’s that?” The elder flipped the package over, eyes quickly skimming over the movie description, trying to make sense of what it's about.

“Spirited Away it is.” 

Tae decided, crashing down on the couch with his arms outstretched along the backrest.

Truth be told, he didn’t care about the movie. He just wanted to spend time with Jungkook.

Jungkook hummed a quiet song as he prepared two generous bowls of the finished stir fry, proudly decorating the dish with the colourful garnished vegetables. He always was quite the perfectionist, whether he knew tae would simply gulp it down in an instant or not.

He grabs the two bowls and carries them out to the living room, a beaming smile on his face as he finds the very man that will be the tester of his cooking,

''Did you find a movie? Hurry, hurry, sit down!''

“I am, I am!” Taehyung laughed, his boxy grin on full display as he made room for Kook on the couch, carefully reaching for one of the nicely decorated bowls.

The smell.. if it tasted the way it smelled, Tae was sure he would love it. 

The elder brought the bowl down after sniffing it, picking up a spoonful of the food before shoving it into his mouth. His cheeks were puffed out whilst he chewed thoroughly, humming in delight.

“I like it!” Taehyung smiled through a mouthful, giving Jungkook a thumbs-up for accentuation. It’s been a while since he’s had a nice home cooked meal. It made him feel warm, “I thought it would taste like shit but..” He laughed, eyes crinkling. “I’m kidding~” The elder took it back, pecking Jungkook on the lips after his first bite.

“I like it a lot.” After Taehyung repeated himself, he held up the DVD in front of Kook’s face, “Spirited Away.”

Jungkook was vibrating with joy at the praise, his cheeks flushed at how fucking /cute/ Taehyung could be. It irked a part of JK that was severely less innocent than he usually is.

His doe eyes blinked two, three times as he stared at the DVD cover, grasping it into his own hands, 

''You like anime?'' Kook looks up at the elder, ''This is a really good movie~'' He chimed, moving so close to taehyung that their sides were pressed together. He was excited, this movie is his favourite-- And food, and .. Taehyung.

He wishes this night would just go on forever.

“First time I’ve ever heard of it. Spirited Away, I mean.” Taehyung shrugged, blowing off the steam on his spoonful of rice before stuffing it into his mouth. The elder learned from his mistake; the previous bite nearly burnt his tongue off.

Tae let out a content moan, finding Jungkook’s cooking to be delicious. It definitely beat frozen pizza any day.

He would love to have this sort of meal on a daily basis, but Taehyung was aware of how lacking he was in the cooking department.

After he fumbled with the DVD player, the beginning music was his cue to join Jungkook back on the couch, bowl of food situated on his lap whilst he ate, gaze flickering back and forth between the bright screen and the dish. 

Sometimes, Taehyung would be so into the movie that he’d spill a few grains of rice. And much like a little kid getting caught red-handed, he would look back at Jungkook and hope that he didn’t see a thing.

Halfway through, and the elder’s bowl was squeaky clean, not a single trace of food was left behind. Taehyung was full and entertained, what more could he want?

Surprisingly, he did want something else though.. answers, to be exact. He still couldn’t forget about what happened in the store, quite frankly, Tae’s been thinking about it ever since it happened.

He just wanted to make sure Jungkook was really okay.

The younger had an anxiety attack, it wasn’t just something Tae could brush off..

“Hey, Kook?” The boy turned to look at him, treading carefully with his words, “About what happened earlier.. with your dad, how do you feel?— I mean, are you fine? I know it must’ve been a lot.”

Taehyung mumbled, fidgeting with his fingers.

“When was it that you got thrown out..? Since when have you been living on your own.”

Jungkook placed his empty bowl away and repositioned himself on the couch, knees pulled up close to his body as if he's hugging himself. He turned his head slowly towards Taehyung, a little surprised by the sudden question.

"Hm... I'm okay." He smiled vaguely to prove his point, a small head tilt following,

"Just a couple months." It was more than a couple months, "almost the entire semester? I don't remember... since I joined the team." Kook shrugged, his expression turning sadder,

"It's been... tough." His eyes flickered between the bright tv screen and back to his boyfriend, "But I'm okay now. It was worth it... I just.. seeing them again was like-- everything just came back to me like a fucking wave."

Taehyung acknowledged the younger’s answer with a faint nod of his head, letting Jungkook know that he was listening to his each and every word. Letting him know that he could confide in him— that he was there.

That’s what boyfriends do, right? 

“Your dad’s an asshole..” Taehyung spat, angry that Jungkook had to go through any of that. He couldn’t help but feel like it was his fault— Kook caught feelings, and he made the mistake of trusting his parents.

The elder turned his body to face him, scooting closer.

His attention was no longer on the movie, simply allowing it to be background noise whilst they spoke. Jungkook’s ‘DVD’ about his hardships in life interested Taehyung far more.

“Your mom didn’t take a part of it; she was quiet.” He paused, “Is she like your dad?”

If Jungkooks expression wasn’t sad enough yet, it surely was now. He can handle the topic of his father far better than about his mother—she’s just... well, she’s mom,

“No, she’s... she’s a great mom.” Kook sighed, his shoulders sagging, “She just...chose her husband first when it came down to it.” He shrugged again, “Always did. When it was just the two of us, she was the best mom.. but when he’s around, it’s like I don’t exist.”

The thought in itself had Jungkook eyes glassy with tears threatening to fall to his cheeks any moment. He takes a deep, shaky breath to calm down, but his next words broke him,

“I just wish she—“ his voice breaks into a sob, “ah—fuck...”

Frustration grew into his sadness, biting his lower lip to prevent it from trembling.

It pained Taehyung to see Jungkook like this, so he immediately engulfed the younger in a warm embrace. With Kook’s face pressed up against his chest, the elder’s hand gently smoothed over the boy’s hair, occasionally running his fingers through the loose curls.

“Hey, it’s okay..” Taehyung’s voice was muffled against the side of Jungkook’s head, not pulling away before pressing a chaste kiss on the spot.

When he finally looked into Kook’s glassy eyes, Tae wiped the stray tears away with the pad of his thumb. He didn’t want to see Jungkook cry anymore.

Jungkook breathed in a sniffle, nodding once as he blinked, forcing the remaining tears out of his eye to trickle down to Taehyung's thumbs,

''I'm okay...'' He smiled through the tears, his own hands wrapping around the elder to pull him in for a hug. He really needed it, and the warmth of tae's body was comforting, leaning his face into the crook of his boyfriends neck,

''Because I have you.''

Taehyung swore his world had come to a halt, chuckling softly at Jungkook’s words whilst he rubbed his back, feeling the wetness of Kook’s tears temporarily staining his skin.

“So cheesy..” Tae quietly breathed out, nevertheless burying his nose against Jungkook’s fluffy hair, letting him know that the feeling was mutual even if he didn’t say anything. 

Taehyung was not the most open person, but for Kook, he’ll try to be. The younger had just opened up to him about his past, it was only fair that he did the same.

Tae wouldn’t say everything, but, just enough to let Jungkook know that he wasn’t alone.

“My dad is a drunk.”

Just admitting that out loud.. it was a big step for Taehyung.

He didn’t want to admit that someone he cared for was partaking in something so self-destructing, but it was the truth. It was about time he came to terms with reality.

“He doesn’t like to admit it but, he is.”

Taehyung gulped, jaw clenching.

“After my.. uh..” He had to take a small pause, trying to desperately fumble with his thoughts so they made sense, “After my mom died, he became worse.”

The elder’s mind immediately traveled back to the beating, the constant cursing.. the /yelling/.

Taehyung didn’t know how much he needed to let those demons out until now, in Jungkook’s embrace.

Jungkook's breathing stopped momentarily, processing the information he just heard. For a bit, he remained simply silent, keeping his arms around the elder. Slowly, the embrace tightened further in comfort, nuzzling his nose against Tae's neck,

''It's not your fault.'' He whispered out the words carefully, his hand rubbing circles over Taehyung's back. They both needed this, and they both had each other. Together, they could be stronger, ''I'm sorry...'' He's sorry that Tae had hardships like this on his own, and he was sorry that he couldn't change his reality.

However, he knew one thing for certain;

Taehyung wouldn't have to go through this alone, just like Kook wouldn't ever have to worry about anything, because he had his one strength embracing him already.

“No, don’t be sorry.” Taehyung weakly assured, drowning in the younger’s touch, his own hands losing the steady momentum they once had. Instead, they gripped at the fabric of Jungkook’s shirt, Tae inhaling the younger’s scent as a way to obtain some closure.

Jungkook made him feel comfortable— he made Taehyung’s skeletons easier to reveal.

“Every time I’m with him.. I just, I’m scared, Kook.” He squeezed his eyes shut, fingers digging deeper into Jungkook’s back.

“Every time I’m with him, it makes me miss my mom even more.”

The elder’s hands relaxed, nestling his nose on the younger’s shoulder. He had a strong urge to cry, but he wouldn’t allow himself to.

Taehyung was already vulnerable enough, ‘“She would’ve loved you, you know.”

Jungkook felt torn between his growing anger towards Taehyung's father and the sadness of the long lost mother. Their lives were so different, their families so different--- yet it wasn't different at all.

They were both hurting. They were both treated unfairly.

He pulled back to look at his boyfriend, a small smile shining through his still glassy eyes, ''Yeah?'' His lower lip trembled at the thought-- being loved by taehyung's mother? He wishes he could say the same about his own. Maybe one day.

''Taehyung,'' He whispered as he leaned in closer, his hands moving up to gently cup his face, guiding the elders face so closer to his own that their lips were grazing as he spoke in words so quiet it was barely audible, scared to sound it out properly-- But unable to keep it hidden any longer, ''I love you.''

The elder nodded, mirroring Jungkook’s look of happiness.

Last he remembered, his mother was very open minded. 

When little Taehyung was about to begin Preschool, he was obsessed with ‘My Little Pony.’ So much so that he begged his parents to get him a backpack with the familiar characters on it. 

Heck, it had Rainbow Dash in the front; it was the best backpack in Taehyung’s big, sparkling eyes!

After a lot of begging, his father refused. Instead, the man held out another backpack with the ‘Hulk’ on it. It didn’t matter what his son preferred. It was green, not pink.

That same night Taehyung couldn’t sleep. His parents were fighting again, making Tae bring up his small hands to his ears.

He flinched under his covers at the sound of furniture being tossed around, followed by more yelling.

His papa could get very angry at times..

Long story short, the next day his mother surprised him with the backpack. She wore a dark bruise on her wrist, but Taehyung was too excited to notice.

At the age of four, that backpack was Tae’s greatest possession. He wouldn’t go anywhere without it.

It was too pretty not to show off.

Subconsciously smiling at the memory, Taehyung shook himself out of it, meeting Jungkook’s eye.

“Hm.” The elder hummed, waiting for Kook to spit it out, nuzzling his nose against the other’s as he waited.

God, he wanted to kiss him. Hard.

Then, pushing all of his longing to the side, Taehyung’s eyes went wide. 

His lips were slightly agape, as if he couldn’t believe his ears. No, he definitely heard wrong.. Right?

“You— you love me..?” Tae questioned, frozen in his place.

He didn’t know what to say, he was at a loss for words.

The elder’s heart felt like it was about to beat out of his chest, hands clammy and mouth dry.

Taehyung hadn’t heard that phrase in a while, it was a little overwhelming.

Jungkook nods, withdrawing himself a little to get a proper look of Taehyung's reaction. He seemed shocked— frozen. Maybe it was too much. Maybe Jungkook shouldn’t have said that.. anxiety in the form of a heavy weight in his gut appeared, his own eyes flickering between Taehyungs, obvious growing panic. 

Fuck, he should’ve stayed quiet. Maybe this was not at all something tae wanted to hear.

“I... sorry...” it’d just slipped out, and he meant it. But now, he felt scared to have opened himself up this much. What If this scared the elder off?

But he couldn’t lie..

“Yeah.” He whispered weakly, and the vulnerability in his voice was apparent, feeling his heart beat harder and harder until it almost hurt underneath his rib cage.

Kook averted the elders eyes, quickly looking down in his lap as he could basically hear his heartbeat drumming in his ears.

Taehyung wasn’t stupid; he was aware that when two people date, there’s romantic feelings involved but.. love. That’s not just any feeling, it came with a price.

Jungkook loves him. He couldn’t fully process it.

Did the younger interpret the word in the same way? Because to Taehyung, loving someone is to admit that the other person completes you in every way, that they’re the reason that some mornings shine brighter than others— It’s equivalent to the love you have for your favorite videogame, plus a thousand. It’s equal to a lifetime supply of strawberry milkshakes from McDonald’s, because lord knows how much Taehyung loves those. 

To him, that’s love. 

Is that how Jungkook felt..?

Breaking the distance between them, now it was Tae’s turn to sandwich the boy’s face in between his hands, gazing into his doe eyes.

“Thank you for opening up to me,” he whispered, not wishing to make things uncomfortable.

This was the best night he’s had in awhile, Tae didn’t want to ruin it.

Slowly, Taehyung’s lips clashed against Jungkook’s in a soft kiss, taking his time with it this time around, “You taste like vegetable stir fry.” The elder breathily chuckled after withdrawing from the kiss, thumb brushing over Kook’s rosy bottom lip before placing one last peck on it.

“Are you tired?”

Jungkook's eyes widened and softened within moments, his anxiety washed away with the simple gesture of the kiss.

He wasn't rejected, but the words weren't repricocated either. And that's /okay/, he did expect too much too quickly, Taehyung had, after all opened himself up more the past week than he's had in years.

Kook smiled at the comment about his foodie-breath, nodding vaguely at the question,

"Yeah, it's been a long day..." he melted into taes soft touches, feeling his body relax once more, "Do you want to... stay?"

He offered the elder to stay the night, itd be the first time since he'd spent the night, and leaving the very next morning. 

This time he hoped that he'd be able to wake up next to him instead.

"I...you can, if you'd like... I want you to."

“Yeah,” A lopsided smile pulled at the corner of Taehyung’s lips, who was comforted by Jungkook’s calm demeanor, “I’ll stay, but I gotta warn you.. I snore.” 

Taehyung forced himself up from the couch, walking over to the sink to rinse his plate.

He felt lighter, like there wasn’t an excruciating weight on his shoulders sagging him down any longer, like the build-up in his chest had vanished.

The elder might’ve not opened up completely in terms of how he got his recent bruises.. but, someday. Someday he’ll tell Jungkook all of it. But, tonight, it felt like a good start.

Jungkook followed into the kitchen like a puppy, rinsing his plate quickly after taehyung is finished, "That's okay, I kickbox in my sleep." He joked, letting his hand stroke along taes back as he passed him on his way back to the living room, turning off the tv. They'd have to pick up and rewatch the movie on another occasion.

Jungkook strolled over to his bedroom, automatically pulling his shirt over his head out of habit, "I'm ready, I demand a proper cuddle-up!"

The elder scoffed, taking off his shirt as well as his pants, leaving himself in just his boxers.

It was more comfortable that way.

“So you’re a kicker and a little bossy. Unbelievable.” Nonetheless, Taehyung wrapped one arm around Jungkook’s shoulders, drawing him closer after pulling the blanket up to their naked chests.

Tae could feel his feet brush against the younger’s from under the cover, legs practically tangled together whilst they stayed in each other’s arms.

Jungkook chuckles breathily, cuddling up close and positioning himself so that he could press his cheek against Taehyung's chest, one leg and arm tangled on top over the male. He melted into the elders body, softly exhaling a content sigh as he was able to listen to the rhythm of Taehyung's heartbeat, slowly calming down with every passing second.

He could stay like this forever-- he was certain of it. 

Sleep came quicker than he expected, the warmth of safety and love giving him a sense of peace he's never been able to experience since he was a child, when his mother used to hold him to sleep.

After minutes of Taehyung’s eyelids struggling to make up their mind, they eventually fluttered close, pulling the elder into dreamland.

That night, Taehyung slept like a baby. 

His worries were left outside Jungkook’s front door, neglected and alone.

For the first time, he was at peace; holding Jungkook tight.

The only thing that was far from peaceful was Tae’s loud snoring. 

Hell, if it was one pitch higher, it might’ve actually been enough to serve as an alarm for the entire apartment complex.

It was an endearing (noisy) quirk of his, but that was Kim Taehyung.

© sombreboy 2020. Do not edit, repost or translate.