#Idk you should be nice to people and recognize when you are the one needing to improve! Be NICE

[creepyscritches]

I wanna thank you for your post about being nice to customer service people as someone who works in a customer service call/text center 🫡 people who say please and thank you to us are so rare! I was so shocked, I thought Americans just didn’t use please and thank you as a cultural thing or something, it really breaks our morale when people are rude for no reason 😣 not only that but also being xenophobic and generally mean. We’re already being exploited by the companies lol we don’t need more mistreatment. Thank you and everyone who is kind ❤️

It is not a cultural thing in the SLIGHTEST to not say please/thank you. You are experiencing inexcusable rudeness and you shouldn't be expected to "get used to it"!

Almost ALL of my IT assistance comes from India and I've worked in tandem with Indian medical coders several times over the years. It's insane to think even my colleagues were griping and moaning about working with ""offshore employees" " 🙄 in my personal and professional life, these employees have been incredibly helpful and kind to me and it's just basic decency to thank them!

Just today I had to call our offshore IT for some convoluted/botched IT update, and it took 5 minutes of polite conversation + trouble shooting to correct everything. IT WOULD HAVE TAKEN ME WEEKS ON MY OWN!! I don't understand how people are so shitty to people that actively fix their most frustrating problems. Like it's already insane to be so rude to strangers, but strangers that are bending over backwards to fix YOUR annoying problem? Go to jail 10,000 years.

I hope you have polite and courteous customers this week, anon! You deserve conversations that make you smile.

[jess-the-vampire]

Professor Caduceia and Snakely

Checked out the storyboard for the deleted s1 episode "Homesick"

You can read it here : https://t.co/WpZJFWbR48

I just loved these cut villains, one whose design def seemed like it was given to raine when they got cut. (I wonder if the color palette was similar, but we don't have a reference to that so idk)

Thoughts on the cut episode below:

An episode where king and owlbert of all characters bond is kinda neat, especially since it provides owlbert himself a bit more character here.

The opening is def far different from any of the final ones we ever see in the series, in fact it feels like it should be taking place during the episode but it can't be given we see hooty from being sick to not being sick in pretty chronological order?

A focus on the healing coven was nice to see, especially since we never got that in the show itself, and get some idea of their powerset and what they do magic wise.

So Manny was an ambulance driver, and Camila was a nurse in this. People originally assumed camila was a nurse when the show started, and it makes me wonder if that was changed between seasons at some point cause clearly the crew decided to change her profession and it's unclear why.

you can use your palisman as a communicator? and an umbrella? I do think it's so weird that even at the very end of the show, they establish brand new rules for palisman. Like them being able to shapeshift into objects is straight up not explained and just sorta....happens in the show, like i feel like hunter would have no issue hiding flap if this is a thing. (It also kinda makes stringbean's ability slightly less unique) Like this is displayed in these boards, but they kept it even in the show itself, and i think palisman might need a proper rulebook.

On that same note, owlbert uses magic in this board, like we kinda knew palisman could do some magic without a witch, but this is the only time we've seen one use it to fight another witch that wasn't the batqueen. Like owlbert tries to full on blast people in this. I don't know if removing this episode makes this ability less canon in the world itself since they still can do magic in the show, it's just worth noting that palisman, according to this board, CAN fight back, even if they're not incredibly strong it seems. Certainly the kinda thing that makes you think on other episodes tbh.

This episode also brings up the idea that eda actually CAN and DOES bring human food to the BI, which never happens in the show, in fact luz implies she gets to eat very little options there, so this idea seems no longer canon?

The demon hunters at one point don't even seem to recognize owlbert as a palisman, which does not entirely make sense given they seem to be mostly common to the townsfolk, so I'm kinda glad for that plot hole being gone.

Caduceia makes it out like the emperor's coven forced her to teach? and she thought handing over a house demon to belos would get her out of teaching as if it were some kinda punishment or job she was made to do? I have questions

side note, house demons are called rare in this, like they're not common, not sure if this still applies in the final show, but yeah.

there's some very sweet moments in this with luz and eda especially, but also some funny moments, and some jokes that land a little less....i don't think we needed Caduceia to be kissing her snake like that from that angle, even if it was meant to be a little uncomfortable.

one reason i think this episode did get cut? we got a glyph in this

a healing glyph, which has some ties to water based on it's symbol

i'm guessing since they kept the main glyphs element based, a healing glyph would of stuck out and been a bit weird. Like it just heals people, it doesn't produce water despite looking close to the alchemy symbol for water, and well....we already got ice so this would be redundent.

so yeah, this episode introduced a new glyph that saved them in the end so it would of come back in future episodes, but to keep it simple that would mean cutting the entire episode as a whole just to keep the four.

Since they enjoyed Caduceia's design so much, they must've repurposed it for raine somewhere down the line.

very fun insight into a scrapped episode.

[crookedkryptonitebeliever]

Best and worst of both worlds (part 12)

Tw: injury, yandere and monty just being a creep

the University option was 60% wben the votes were 20, idk y suddenly u guys decided to favour 5 blocks away from ur house too

Damn from what i seen theres like distinct team monty and team Yves, ngl as writer i am biased towards Yves he my favourite

Part 13

You told him that you need to go to class.

Montgomery frowned. "If ya' say so." He shifted his gears and began driving away.

You looked at the scenery around you. This place is definitely not somewhere you visited before, you see a few buses driving by. But none of which you recognize.

"You free during the weekends?" He asked.

You said no.

Montgomery pouted. "Well, when are you free?"

You shrugged and said being a university student is demanding.

He sighed dejectedly. "What do I know, I only have a high school diploma. Wasn't one for the books, I'd rather git' out there and make me some cash."

You stayed silent.

"You ain't built for that, it really ain't for the faint hearted. So you gotta stay in school and try your hardest, sweetheart. Follow your dreams of becoming... whatever you wanted to be."

You nodded in acknowledgement. But Montgomery kept talking.

"I came to the city 'cause I heard I can make it big there. I didn't really have a plan, I was hopin' I'd make big bucks and start my own business." He switched his blinker on as he readies himself to make a turn.

"It was totally harder than I thought. I moved from city to city, was broke in every single one and I had to live out of my car if I wanted to eat. The people, all of 'em were mean as hell no matter where I go. They're nothin' like the people back home."

Curiosity gets the best of you and you asked why didn't he just return to base.

He laughed. "I didn't wanna hear an 'I told you so' from my family. I had to fight to get out of that damn farm. I can't imagine the humiliation if I come back home, tail between my legs, empty handed."

The air between you became quiet after that.

"So... what are ya' studying?"

You tried your best to explain your degree and the profession that you're hoping to work as. Montgomery hummed in response.

"I dunno much about that. But it sure sounds stressful and too brainy for me. You're such a smart kid."

You said thanks.

"A little lackin' in the brawn department though. That's why you need me to protect ya'." He grinned. "We sure are such a great match! When I get that business idea of mine up and runnin', you're gonna be handling the books. I'll be handlin' the shop- the physical part. We're gonna be swimmin' in riches, in no time!"

You didn't respond to that, making his excited laughter die down quickly.

"...Or you could just choose what'cha wanna do. Fine by me, I'll fund it the best I can." Montgomery is starting to look uncomfortable, it seems like he's trying to make some conversation with you. But you didn't want to give him any more of your attention.

The rest of the ride went by smoothly.

__

"Sixth period, I guess." He stopped in front of the entrance. You wonder if he's confused as to why he barely sees anyone around now.

You looked at the time. It's 11:45AM. The bus is coming in 5 minutes.

"Here." He shoved something into your hands. "Treat yourself to something nice." You uncrumpled it to reveal two $20 bills.

You thanked him and pulled the handle of the door.

"Wait! I want your number!" He got out of his car and ran up to you.

You said that you don't remember and you don't have your phone with you.

"You don't remember your own phone number?" He stared in disbelief.

You said that with the advancement of technology, no one needs to remember any phone numbers. It's all stored in the smartphone.

He scratched the back of his neck. "Well, I think you should memorize at least a couple of em'. What are ya' gonna do when your phone breaks, huh? You're gonna be doomed!"

Yeah. Like how you are right now.

You tried to end the conversation by agreeing and saying bye.

"I have an idea." You yelped as he grabbed you by the wrist. He pulled out a pen and uncapped it, Montgomery wrote a string of numbers on your arm.

You can only watch as he decorated your entire forearm in horror. How are you going to explain this to Yves?

"There, that's my number."

You pulled your arm away and told him that you're going to be late for class.

"Don't forget to call me!" He hollered as you move far, far away from him.

__

Finally, $40 richer, 100% more disturbed, 200% sweatier, you reached your house. 20 minutes late.

You dragged yourself onto the porch and struck your arm repeatedly against the door. Panting with your tongue out like a dog.

You wiped the sweat off your brow as the door opened. Thinking it's one of your housemates, you tried walking past them, only to be grabbed by the shoulders.

"(Name)!"

You looked up and saw Yves with the most haunting expression you've ever seen on his beautiful yet bruised face. Half it was still concealed by his hair. There was a mix of worry, sadness, anger and relief. It was an expression that guarantees you're in trouble.

You stared at him for a few seconds, his dilated pupil never left yours. You felt like you were on a court trial during those 20 seconds, Yves seemingly scrutinizing every aspect of your soul.

You burst into tears, sobbing loudly and pathetically. You didn't know where to start, you had so many unmet needs at the moment.

You're roasting in your own skin and sunburnt, you don't even have a wink of sleep, you feel violated by Montgomery, your stomach hurts from eating the greasy fast food, your muscles are aching from that epinephrine shot, you have a headache, you don't like how your clothes stuck to your body and Yves is mad at you.

One of the needs was immediately met when he pulled you into a hug.

"I'm not upset at you." He whispered, pressing kisses on your head. You cried harder and sunk into him deeper.

Of course, he knew what happened, where you went and what Montgomery did. All of it was caught on surveillance cameras and they're easy to hack into. He heard the conversations between you and him, Montgomery should upgrade his phone, it didn't even put up a fight when he tried accessing it remotely.

All because he didn't predict that you would be anaphylactic to your new medicine. If you knew he's virtually everywhere and watching your every move, Yves would have immediately intercepted before you could even put a foot down on the floor.

Yves let you wet his clothes until you calmed down enough for him to pull you into the house, where it is much cooler and dimmer. Your nosy housemates were peeking from the hallway, but this time Yves wasn't acting so nice. He shot them all a death glare, which made them promptly retreat into their rooms.

He closes the door and leads you to the sofa. Where he allowed you to let your emotions out on his chest, while sitting on his lap.

A hand stroking the back of your head, another pulling you close to him. Yves placed his lips on your forehead as snot drips down your nose and onto Yves. He doesn't mind your sweat or skin flakes.

Yves does appreciate that Montgomery was there at the right time. When you started to rub your eyes excessively, Yves was already on the highway, doing 120 miles per hour on an 80 limit. He knows something is wrong.

Unfortunately, though, he was too late and Montgomery already drove off with you. So he had to do a detour and tailgate him instead.

He did all the calculations and thought of all the possible outcomes in his head. And... to his dismay, the best one was to let everything that happened to you happen. Yves lets go and allows Montgomery to be the hero for today for the sake of your life.

But you were never in any real danger. Yves was following closely behind this entire time. Of course, you're definitely going to be uncomfortable. However, he knows you're not stupid, he could not slip a single "coincidence" that will allow him to save you from Montgomery. It's going to be too implausible to happen given that Yves is still a relatively "normal" person in your eyes.

You hiccupped in his chest, apologizing over and over again. Yves assured you that you did nothing wrong. He reached for his bag, taking out a packet of wet wipes and dry facial tissues.

He began cleaning you with the damp towel. Yves did not flinch when you coughed right into his face and had thick, opaque mucus land on his eyelashes. He continued wiping away the snot and tears while letting a glob of green rest on his eye.

If you had lingered at the university longer, Yves would have 'coincidentally' bumped and picked you up instead. Under the guise of him searching for you because he arrived early at your place to find the front door unlocked, your bag in your room and your phone on the table. Very unusual behavior of you.

But he underestimated your desperation to catch the next bus. You have broken his records, that was the fastest you ever ran since middle school and he has the data to back it up.

Now that you're slowly relaxing, Yves removed the goop from his eye using another wet wipe. His long eyelashes clumped together from the moisture. He continued by drying you using the facial tissues, which includes drying the sweat from your back and to your rear. Who gives a damn if Yves has his hands up your shirt and down your pants, it's Yves. You trust him.

You didn't pay enough attention to wonder why he brought some aloe gel today out of all days. Yves snapped the lid open and applied a pea sized amount on his fingertips. Yves spread it evenly on your now peeling skin, you let your shoulders sag as the gel soothes the burning pain.

Montgomery proved himself useful, twice. First, by saving your life. Second, by helping Yves look much more appealing to you. Doesn't his feather-like touches feel nice? It's nothing like that brute's talons.

Yves only wished that he had half a brain to feed you something appropriate and not an artery-blocking lump of fat and sugar. Four, of them plus two grease saturated hash browns, to be precise. God, Montgomery is spineless, he should have stopped you or at least found a way to make you eat slower.

You fell limp onto him as he skillfully massaged your scalp with his fingers. Your eyes rolled back into your head as the tingles travel down your spine, causing you to forget about the soreness you've been experiencing.

Yves had a look of disdain when he caught a glimpse of Montgomery's phone number written on your arm in pen ink. He doesn't know when to quit, does he?

You never once stopped to wonder how he knew to prepare a pack of ice wrapped in a towel even before you came back. He brought the chilly item to your neck, cooling down one of your crucial points.

Yves continued massaging your head to relieve you of any tension. He ticked off his mental checklists on your needs, another thing is going to be off his list very soon.

He watches your eyelids droop until your eyes are fully closed. Now draped across his lap, you're starting to snore and drift into slumberland.

He sighed. Caressing your tender leg as you sleep.

"You are such a troublemaker." He quietly hissed. Scooping you into his strong arms.

Yves carried you into your room, where he lowered you onto your bed. He didn't put the blanket on you, because you will overheat, wake up and panic again.

He went out and retrieved his bag. Yves took out his portable fan and placed it near you, so the moving air could cool you down further. If you weren't so bashful and considerate, he would have installed a portable air conditioning unit in your room already. But he knows you will find the gesture too extravagant and start to spiral out of control with your self depreciation.

He closed the curtains, turned off the lights. The only thing illuminating the otherwise dark room are the holes in your curtains and his laptop screen.

Yves took a seat, put on his reading glasses and began typing away. One hand keying in the information, the other holding the wretched medication that hospitalized you.

[meruz]

hi im putting all my asks in one post again. these are from like the past month and a half approx? some digimon thoughts some tmnt thoughts some art musings u know the usual

@waywardistics YAYY thank you so much for ordering! I'm glad it got to you & that you are enjoying it!

this is kind of a missive to everyone who ordered but: I am very nervous about pre-orders whenever I do them... nervous that not very many people will order, nervous that there will be supply chain or production dilemmas and I won't be able to get copies out to people in a timely fashion, nervous about having people's money but having an indeterminate amt of time where i have not yet "held up my part of the bargain" etc etc SO. THANK U GUYS...FOR ORDERING and being patient and im so glad it got to y'all

@seanonthemoon (idk why i cant tag u BUT) interesting... i gotta be honest I don't think abt the crests that much. i agree that they're very much like heres the "girl" crest heres the "nerd boy" crest etc to the point that it becomes almost meaningless. but i think what makes them even more meaningless to me, and is probably the reason they kind of designated girl/boy crests etc is that i think like the digivices they're toys and merchandise more than they are actual narrative tools LOL. I wouldve loved something with cody and mimi! theyre both so deeply empathetic and sensitive.. theres a lot they share but i think because they look so different on the surface it would make it difficult to market that merch...booo capitalism boooo toy marketing its all sexist bullshit at least here in the u.s. idk if japan is that different though.

I'm actually a little frustrated with how often 02 and 02 related media squanders cody in general lol. he feels like a parallel of izzy, joe, and TK(season 1 tk) while also being kind of none of those and suffering through lackluster characterization as a result... and then once ken joins the team it feels a little redundant. there's a couple cody-centric eps of 02 I remember really liking but then i think abt how he's been used since in like post-series content and 02:the beginning where they made him type on the computer even though obviously that's yoleis thing but because he had nothing else to do and aghh... my blood boils. i feel like the youngest but most serious anime achetype even at its bare bones is actually rly interesting idk why they don't play it up. UM. Once again my opinion is that he should be taller LOL and maybe they should play up his kendo martial arts honorable training stuff more idk. tallest + youngest + most serious just seems like a recipe for success for me. well. theres still time. and theres always fanfic.

THIS IS SO NICE TO SAY and not the first time someone has said it but i appreciate it everytime because i really admire the mm art style so much. It's like part of why I got really into the movie because I really recognized my own artistic sensibilities and aspirations in the way they stylized everything.

UM And i feel like since watching the movie and looking at all the concept art and making my own art i do feel like its only become more obvious how much my own art is lacking LOL LIKE when you see something that feels so similar I think the differences only become more stark. those artists are definitely on a different level than me. But it's nice to hear people say it doesn't look so different from their pov. thank u ^^

thank u!!!!!!! i love mundanity and naturalism... there's something so beautiful abt it to me lol... I feel like my anatomy needs work actually but ive been feeling better abt it this year so it's good to hear! thank you!

DLKGDSGDLALSNDF WAS IT TOO FAR..?? firstly, yeah I was thinking late teen/young adult ages for both of them ie 18-19ish, definitely not the age the kids are in the movie lol.

but also they arent DOING anything in that pic it is literally just a confrontation + some innuendo... I think teens should be allowed some less than subtle innuendo.. its like one of the top 3 classically teen pastimes...

this is such a funny ask to get because i feel like i haven't been able to do thin lineart until like. this past year or two maybe LOL. UM having a line-centric art job helped I think. I started on craig of the creek back in 2022 and thats a show where we spend a lot of time inking so I had a job where I was constantly moderating my line weight 40 hours a week every week for over a year. disappointingly, much of improvement is simply horrendous amounts of practice.

Here's a tip though: I think a lot of thin lineart boils down to confidence. I think instinctively we read thick, bold, fast lines as confident but theres actually a lot of obscuring you can do with a thick line. if you're not sure whether the nose on the face or a browline should be a little more left or a little more down you can hide that with a thick line and pretend its a shadow. or hide it with a bunch of quick lines and the eye can kind of approximate where looks best among the mass.. whereas a thin line is rly singular and stark and hides nothing, it needs to be precise. so anytime i know i want thin lineart i spend a LOT of time sketching, making sure i know exactly where i want my lines to go. so im not second guessing by the time im inking...

ok thats kind of a broad tip lol... here's one thats more applicable: IF POSSIBLE, lower your pressure sensitivity on your device. most devices have some way to edit your pressure sensitivity curve. I use a surface pro at home and this is what my pressure curve looks like most of the time.

When I work on a wacom it looks even more like a reverse L shape LOL. I'm naturally a really heavy-handed artist and I use a "light" or "hard" pressure curve to compensate for how hard I'm always pressing on the pen lol. if you're like me and you struggle with going too hard with the ink too fast... this will probably help a lot!

SFHASLDFH I LOVE THIS ASK this is like the type of question a person gets asked when chalk drawing on the sidewalk at recess LOL. but i understand because I've been struggling also for like. months. I think I'm finally starting to nail it down though so here's some of my observations.

[feel free to save this img but **please do not re-post it or share broadly**. my biggest fear in the world is to spend 30 min on some notes and become a widely proliferated art tutorial im not even kidding. i made it low contrast and difficult to read on purpose.]

my other tip is to just look at and study a lot of reference because that's all ive been doing. the tmnt are really cartoony so its difficult to use like actual anatomical reference unless ur going for that look BUT theres been so many adaptions in so many different styles that there's a real treasure trove of stuff to look at for how to simplify, stylize, and dissect these characters while keeping the recognizable essence. so theres lots to pull from.

If you want to expand further, it's also good to have 5) something sci-fi 6)something fantasy 7)something mundane/slice of life. a bedroom is a really good go-to. And of course some bgs can be two or more of these things at once.

I've definitely answered asks abt bg tips before but here's one specifically for if you want to do bg design for a job:

Your portfolio should probably have at least one of each of the following 1) an interior 2) an exterior 3) a cityscape 4) a nature scene. Just to cover kind of the basics of what you'd be asked to draw on any given project.

I actually feel like I don't have that many cityscrapes in my portfolio... this is something I'm gonna try to work on in the coming year LOL. OH ALSO. This is a very basic tip and people will tell you it all the time but its worth repeating: look up portfolio websites of artists who have the job you want. An easy way to do this is to go onto imdb for any cartoon or movie you like and to find the names listed as "bg/background designer" or whatever then just google that name +"art" or "animation" most artists have some public facing internet presence so it's not hard. spend time studying their work and hold those images in your head! it's a good way to get a good idea of what "industry standard" looks like and comparing ur own art to it... I know people sometimes get bummed comparing their art to others but if you can keep your head up lol.. it'll help you figure out what you need to work on!

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ok thats all i have to say sorry for typing so much. happy new year everybody who read this far LMAO!!!!!

[prodigal-explorer]

cant send this on anon. sad! anyways i think the point of pattons arc is to accept that the others have importance. learning to not bottle up his feelings was the first step to fixing a larger issue about himself, that being that he tries to put all responsibility of himself. and that manifests in a lot of ways, including not respecting the others and their roles.

but then you get to the end of pof, and after janus resigns to being wrong about everything, patton says that they both know that's not true. that to me signifies that something shifted in him after pof. thats him directly recognizing that janus was right. that selfishness was the right choice, that janus is important. and this is a direct consequence of janus pointing out his flaws to him (when he turns back into a human he admits that he doesn't know what hes doing and he cant pretend that he does anymore. which is a direct response to when he resolves to make sure thomas isnt a bad person in svs)

does that mean he's good at it? no. not at all. but i do think hes trying. given that hes already had a major breakdown in a video i cant see the same happening for the finale but he should definitely take time to acknowledge the others roles. maybe he can talk logan/orange down and tell him that the rage he feels is justified and important to thomas? something like that. i would love it if remus got a chance to be involved but i have the bad feeling hes gonna be the designated one dimensional comedic relief. which i kinda get why but also come the fuck on. anyways thats my two cents idk

i completely agree with you homie!!!

i also appreciate the nuance in this take cuz so many people fly to my askbox and try to tell me that patton is some innocent baby and that he should never be criticized ever because "he's trying!" and that's not what you did you actually spoke like with intelligence which was so fucking awesome to read. /g

i absolutely agree with everything you said. this is patton's arc. his arc isn't "i'm too nice and i need to stop being too nice" HELL NO that's not his arc whatsoever and there is no indication of that being his arc even though people constantly pretend that's his arc. NO. his arc is that he needs to learn that he is not the end-all-be-all of thomas' mind, and that he is not always the most important voice in the conversation. though he doesn't have overstated hubris, how highly he thinks of himself and how lowly he thinks of the others is blatantly obvious through his actions, and he's slowly getting better at, like, NOT doing that and it's really good change to see! he still has a...long...long...LONG way to go, but at least he's going somewhere. i just wish people would acknowledge this super interesting journey instead of watering patton down and being super fucking annoying whenever i try to critique him the tiniest bit.

[downtoncoquetteroach]

Notes: so, English is not my native language so please don't be harsh on me. This supposed to be a one shot, I wrote it at 4am on my phone to avoid anxiety and in the morning I came up with some more ideas so, idk how long this will be, no more than 5 chapters for sure, I'll try to publish the second one soon. Also this is my first published fanfiction ever. I hope you like it.

⭐If I could be who you wanted ⭐

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Fem reader

Neville Longbottom x Fem reader

Word account: 2,484

Summary: Fred Weasley has been your crush forever and getting him is a real possibility but, what if it's not what you need anymore?

TW: swearing, virginity loss, fingering, slightly minimal Dom kink, breeding kink.

No Neville in this chapter, only smut Fred

🤌🏻🔥

Chapters 2, 3, 4, 5

Chapter 1: Use your words 💫

His hair, beautifully brushing his nose, his long delicate fingers touching his wand, always playing with it, provoking occasionally sparks without his knowledge as a perfect example of how y/n was feeling her stomach, watching his every move. "Red is the colour of the heart, just like it is the hair of the man who stoled mine". Y/n wrote that when she was 13 and she was full of embarrassment recognizing that she was about to send him a card with that horrid text inside but stopped as soon as she saw him and his twin mocking Ginny and other cheesey girls on valentine's. Love was as funny and unreal for him as his older brother perfect pin badge. So y/n managed to keep her love for Fred Weasley a secret, no one knew she loved him so bad she wanted to throw up every time he touched her hair, even in a playful way, she should have felt like a dog but her whole underwear was full of weird stains that could prove that she was totally soked for the man most of the time, it was ridiculous. When she found out he wanted to be on The Triwizard Tournament she cried the whole night thinking about what could happen to him, what if he died, what if he got serious damage, God how she cried, always on the verge of dramatism, always concerned about his grades and what if he got expelled?, how could she managed to survive without looking at his amazing outline, his beautiful eyes, his lovely lips mocking her whit that mischievous smile. Damn to re-read y/n first years at Hogwarts diaries is agony. She was delusional for the man... and then, the fantasy became real, but not at all in the way she expected.

So, yeah, they weren't super close but they were friends, since first year, she practically sat beside him and George at every meal and teamed up with them from time to time on class, they joked, they play, they sang out loud at party's, coping each others homework. But it wasn't like she was going with them to Hogsmeade on weekends, she was not taken in consideration for big pranks, she didn't even get the scoop in them, he certainly didn't talk to her about his girls or bring her anything from his kitchen rounds. But then, one night something changed.

The whole Gryffindor house was celebrating winning the quidditch match against Hufflepuff, Cherry Coloured Funk by Cocteau twins was playing in the old record player while every student left tried to understand what the singer was singing about, comparing her to Celestina Warbeck, drunk laughter's filling the common room, a nice soft red conjured light making everything dreamy and surreal, y/n wasn't drunk but certainly feeling funny, relaxed enough to dance alone in front of other people without being self conscious, and then, she felt a cold hand on her's, pulling with force, making her trip over the hand owners lap, Fred's lap. Y/n blushed so hard, she was immediately trying to stand, they were separated from the others, so that made him brave enough to do what he did. As Heaven or Las Vegas was filling the night, Fred's soft long slim fingers were caressing her skirt fabric, above her knees, his other hand grabbing her waist, eyes locked on y/n, his mouth slightly open, lips almost touching her's, holding his breath while his thumb finally reached her core and just for a second he touched her. Y/n jumped at the sensation and woke him up from his drunkness, he let her go and she went upstairs to wash her face, running through the whole staircase and finding her room empty, the other girls were probably around the castle kissing boys. As soon as she was alone she was full of regret, why did she run away? Why did he did that? Was that real or one of her daydreams coming to life courtesy of firewhiskey? Y/n finished washing her face when she hear some shy knocking on the door, it was Fred.

He looked embarrassed, something so unsettling to witness given the fact that he was always so confident and nonchalant. He stood there, red face matching his hair when he started speaking in a hurry, bumbling:

love I'm so sorry I, I want to apologize, I didn't mean, I, I don't know what happened to me, I wasn't sure what I...

She simply said: it's fine, it is really I don't, I mean It was nice.

She sounded so bloody stupid, but she did not want to make him feel as awful as he looked and besides she wasn't lying. Fred stood there in silence without a clue on what to do next, she was feeling the same way, but then he said

Are you... alone?

Yes

Wonderful

He got inside the room and closed the door with a locking charm and a silencing spell, then walked slowly to y/n looking relieved and more like himself

You know sweetheart, you shouldn't let anyone ever touch you like that, you seemed scared, maybe I was too harsh?

No! No, it was -

Nice yeah, you said that but, didn't look like you enjoyed yourself so much do you? I might be a little drunk but, I can recognize when a girl is not happy with my advances

Y/n was shocked, how could this be happening? The whole conversation was unreal, he was making her feel like a little furry creature, nervousness weakening her knees, her knickers almost dropping just by looking at him, Fred bloody Weasley in her damn room, eyes full of...desire? quidditch uniform still on, his classic mischievous smile coming up, him, getting closer and closer to her

He held her hand

Is it ok that I'm here?

Y -yeah, sure

Do YOU want me here?

Y/n managed to nod slowly but he immediately said

Use your words princess

I-

He was gently touching her cheek, instantly making her close her eyes as he got closer to her lips, whispering

Do you want me here?

And releasing a sight she was holding since the first time she saw him on the train to Hogwarts she said

I do.

He kissed her.

He's soft lips were caressing her's so slowly and delicately while his scent filled y/n's head, he got his hands on her's, fingers interwined, guiding y/n slowly to the bed, his wet tongue licking her lower lip, making y/n whimper in surprise. She had never ever kissed a boy in the french way before which was her biggest insecurity given the fact that she was almost sixteen. Fred stoped.

Love, please tell me if I am wrong but, is this your first kiss?

She guessed it was her scared look what gave her away

Ahm

She started to get away but he stopped her

Princess if I'm making you uncomfortable please tell me and I'll leave you alone forever, but kissing your beautiful lips before any man its my biggest achievement so far, so, tell me, I'm the first?

Y/n's pride was hurt a little when she quietly said

You are.

Y/n had never seen lust before, Fred's eyes were almost black and closed while he reached to kiss her more passionately than before, holding her face between his hands while she dared to put her hands through his long beautiful hair, immediately rewarded with a soft grunt fully delivered in her mouth. She could feel her core throbbing, head spinning, hormones screaming through her skin by the feeling of his tongue all over her's, he put her on the bed softly and then got on top of her, his long strong legs opening her's, y/n could feel his hardness through their clothes, pushing hard on her wet pussy, his hands were all over her legs and ass while her hands were fumbling under his sweater, reaching his bare stomach and hips. Fred was over the edge, the other girls he had before were much more experienced and older than him, he always ended up being their prey, this was the very first time he was in control and he liked it so much he was ready to cum just now. It wasn't just that. To be honest, he was absolutely turned on by y/n since he found out about her sweet crush on him in third year, he liked to pet her just to see her blush, but it wasn't until this night, with his confidence over the cloud's by wining the game that he had the courage to make his fantasy's real. Y/n eyes were full of adoration, he could feel his dick getting painfully hard as she lay beneath him, so horny and willing to give herself to him. She looked so beautiful he couldn't stop touching her skin while looking at her in the eyes just to see her reaction. She was so sensitive, that when he started to take her clothes she was full of goosebumps, almost drooling at the sight of him without his sweater and t shirt.

Y/n was totally sober by now because of the impression, was her first time happening? She was about to lose her virginity to Fred Weasley? How could she be so lucky? And then she started feeling worried, what if she didn't make him feel good? She didn't know how to give pleasure to a boy, and he looked so secure, in charge of everything... he must had read her thought because he suddenly said

Y/n do you want to stop? It's ok if you do, no hard feelings or anything, if you are not comfortable we can just hang and that's all

She was glad he didn't said he'll leave.

It's ok Fred, I want you

Jesus fucking Christ y/n had never said anything so direct and needy in her whole life, what was it about this man that turned her into a complete moron. She wished that it was more alcohol in her system to keep her relax and cool but the fire whiskey was long gone with all of her sweat and lubrication. That thought made her question, what if Fred was so drunk she was taking advantage of him

But ahm, aren't you drunk? Isn't this something you would regret tomorrow? What if I'm taking advantage of you? Your judgement is not right at the moment we should...

Fred laughed, he couldn't believe how sweet she was, he got closer to her ear and whispered

Love, I'm going to destroy your little pussy.

She was unable to contain a moan, Fred started kissing her neck, licking his way down on her, y/n's breath was shaking, she didn't knew what to do or what was gonna happen, Fred was pulling aside her little flowered pantys and without warning, he started licking her violently. It was incredible helpful that he put a silence charm on before because y/n's whimpers could have woken up the entire castle. She tasted so good he couldn't stoped liking her hole cunt and the fact that she was fully soaked for him before he even did anything was priceless. He wanted to put his fingers inside her but he managed to wait, he just had to see her face while he took her virginity.

Y/n was almost fainting, she didn't knew she could feel that much pleasure, that boy's could do that with their tongs, she was over the edge and without even thinking she said

Fred, fuck me, please, I need you

He almost came. Having her pleading for his dick while he eat her was just too much, he pulled apart from her and stood

What did you say princess?

Y/n was totally out of herself

Im, I- I want you, I want you inside me

Y/n's sudden shyness made his dick leak some pre cum and he unbuttoned his trousers. She was so freaking cute, he couldn't handle it, all of those years of watching her, so shy, so tender, and now he was about to make her his.

Y/n couldn't stop staring at Fred's amazing torso exposed, his muscly arms, long slim fingers, soft messy hair, smooth skin, and then his wonderful knob in all of his glory making her a little bit worried, he was all over the edge by the impression in her face

Love don't worry, you'll take me just fine

Fred got on top of her again, kissing every part of her body, sucking her breast, caressing her body with the tip of his fingers, causing goosebumps all over her...agitated breath anticipating the pain.

She felt it, his huge hard dick all over her fanny, so tasty it made them both grunt loudly, he's started swearing quietly while he rocked her, getting all wet and nice to make it fit, and then looked at her in the eyes

Last chance to run angel, are you sure you want me to...

Y/n kissed him and then she said

Fred I'm already yours just take me -

And he did. He knew for a fact that making things slowly just prolonged the pain so he did give her his whole cock in one exhibit while he scrutinized her face, her eyes, her lips. He wanted to memorize all of the perfect sounds his little princess was making for him, because of him. He kept fucking her, asking occasionally if she was alright.

Princess can I come inside you?

Y/n couldn't handle it anymore and came so badly she stopped hearing what he said after. She sensed her insides full of his delicious juices and felt happy that he understood and kept her eyes closed for a while, trying to conceive what had just happened.

Fred was freaked, he just told her that he wanted to filled her with his baby's. He had never ever said (neither thought) that before, wtf was going on with him. And the worst part was that he actually meant it? His dick was getting hard again just by thinking of it. Merlin, and she wasn't saying anything. What should he do?

Angel are you ok?

She was asleep.

[a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire]

I finally read again today, chapters 34-39 this time

Usually I read these books in german while on the bus but today I forgot my book, but fortunately, I had some time to go to the library and they had it, but only in english. And since I was sitting at a table with my phone, I was able to take notes live as I read, and I'd like to share those with you rather than doing what I usually do and trying to sum up all of my thoughts a few hours later

Chapter 35:

the fact that NO ONE in the summer court recognized Feyre is absolutely ridiculous, it really is like her accomplishments from the first just vanished, no wonder so many people recommend just skipping ahead to MAF i bet that would make the reading experience wayyyyy less frustrating

shes cursing herself from being so out of shape despite Cassian's 'lessons' and that reminds me, at the start of ACOMAF her internal monologue and other characters kept remarking on how thin and frail she had become and I dont think its come up since she started staying at the NC permanently, great mental health rep girlie

"I let instinct, no doubt granted from Rhys, guide me forward." Come onnnnnnnn, can Feyre not be cool on her own for one (1) moment

"Amarathan did not break that kindness [from before UTM]." no, but Rhys sure did

Once again, Feyre is horrified at her violating Tarquin's mind, rightfully so, and yet she continues to hang out with His Majesty, The King of Violating Minds

Rhys tells Feyre that she "thinks like an Illyrian", which is very strange to me given that Illyrian women are literally not allowed to do anything other than housework and Illyrian men are seemingly all violent misogynists whom Rhys hates

Chapter 36:

"I'd bet they wouldn't have handed over that book" but you didnt ask them though??? Like, they couldve just told Tarquin about their plans, he seems reasonable enough, even if Cresseida and Varian dont agree, he as high lord should be able to override their opinions easily and if that doesnt work out THEN you can go ahead and steal it. Sure, maybe they wouldve trippled security and/or thrown them out of the SC but that should hardly be an obstacle for The Most Powerful Highlord In The History Of Prythian and his eldritch girl best friend

Okay, so Rhysand did pack illyrian leathers for her which is nice, but still, I see no reason why Feyre had to wear dresses for this (and be okay with wearkng dresses when she absolutely wasnt at the start of ACOMAF) when the NC clearly has more feminine fashion involving pants

Theres lead in this vaguely medieval fantasy world?? And theyve had for like centuries?? That seems weird to me I'll have to look into that i think

Okay, so Feyre shapeshifted into Tarquin and she says that she didnt let any part of herself that wasnt Tarquin shine through while she opened the books locks, but those shapeshifting powers are Tamlin's though. That has some very interesting implications but tbh idk if I trust sjm to have thought about it that much

"I am summer; I am sea and sun and green things" that just sounds kinda silly, also I feel like it shouldve been "I am sea and sun and golden sand" given the beach vibes that the Summer Court has

Chapter 37:

note to self: lookup what Leshon Hakodesh is exactly bc theres no way its not some random mythological term that sjm is just dropping into her world [edit: its just the jewish term for 'the Holy Tongue', im not gonna question the implications of that any more than im gonna question the existence of Nyx as a minor goddess or something in this world]

Rhysand doesnt tells anyone jackshit and Cassian is ready to stab Amren if she dares go against him, why are these jokers friends again?

Chapter 38:

granted, its been a while since I read this book and my memory isnt the best, but why exactly does Rhysand need to keep the 'why' of their mission secret? wasnt their mission just to find the cauldron before Hybern does and prevent a war with prythian and the human world?? I guess maybe Rhys doesnt wanna reveal his secret goodness or whatever, but he couldve just had Feyre act as some kind of emissary to the rest of Prythian, like, just have her pretend this is information she found out by herself at the Night Court and have her relay it to the other courts, Feyre has saved them before they have no reason not to listen to her

"'I think Tarquin wanted to be my friend.'" question, is Tarquin/Rhys a thing? Obviously Rhys doesnt deserve Tarquin but idk, there could be something there I think. they have some nice aesthetic contrasts

why would Feyre say stuff like "mother above" when thats not a deity she believed in for most of her life? Like, I already talked about how Feyre clearly had the impulse to pray in ACOTAR she just didnt do it because the names of the mortal gods have been long forgotten, but idk, I feel like her starting to embrace fae religion warrants more exploration. and fae religion in general warrants more exploration tbh

"'Its not the end of the world if you [make a mistake] every now and then'" hello??? Feyre, he made you steal from a man that has been nothing but kind to you for no reason and now theres a bounty on your heads!! And lets not forget that Rhys, Amren and Feyre are all highranking politicians in the night court, youre lucky the SC is too occupied with rebuilding itself to declare war on your asses

I keep saying this, its so infuriating how well Feyre and Rhysand already get along when theyve spent like, 2 or maybe 3 months if Im being very generous, worth of time together aside from their time UTM

god Feysand flirting is the most straight bullshit to ever straight bullshit I feel like im gonna die

Shes thinking about buying RED "lacy things" when that was meant to be a trigger for her, did no one edit this

"a sensual male voice chuckled with midnight laughter" istg the prose is so much worse in english

Feyre having to make herself focus to not look at Rhysand dick after he just had a horrible nightmare has the same energy as Bryce Crescent City thinking about how hot and muscular Hunt is while he just completely shut down because he had to kill someone

"The hole in my chest that was slowly starting to heal over" can you BE more unsubtle

Chapter 39:

Rhysand tattooing the symbol of the nightcourt onto both his knees because he "will bow for no one and nothing but his crown" is actually so funny, i wish he did more cringefail bullshit like that

I think out of all the inner circle relationships, I like Amren and Feyre the best so far and I absolutely do not believe that Cassian cares about Amren at all, much less sees her as family, that guy would kill her in a heartbeat if he could

forgive my aromanticness, but I really dont like the thing that Amren and Varian have going on, cant there be ONE character that doesnt have some stupid romance subplot in this world

Oh, so Mor telling Feyre very little of any specific plans they have is fine, but if someone from the spring court does it theyre the worst person ever

"[Cassian told me] that my family was full of bossy, know-it-all females" oh but hes sooooo much better than all those other illyrians who are all sexist brutes

Why are Beron and Helion the only ones with a last name

"[Strolling through Velaris with Mor] was perhaps my favorite, and the female certainly excelled at finding ways to spend money" are you fucking kidding me, are there actually people who consider a book with this kind of blatant 'women b shopping' bullshit to be feminist?

"'I wanted to protect my people, change the perceptions of the Illyrians, and eliminate the corruption that plagued the land'" wow Rhys and youve done such a good job at all of those things in the 500 years youve been on the throne

"[Tamlin] resented being High Lord — and maybe... maybe that was part of why the court had become what it was" ???? girlie what are you talking about, the spring court is fine right now it doesnt get destroyed until ACOWAR. which is also you fault

so Feyre is once again wearing a chiffon gown for political reasons when she could very well be wearing pants and shes completely fine with that. great

And Mor is wearing red and Feyre is completely unbothered by it, why give her a trigger like that if it just stops mattering the second shes out of the spring court

[kamil-a]

more DRAWER talk. long and rambly under cut

i think it comes across as very ahhh eto blehhh :9 im just baby!!!! because it identified that speaker is already speaker and the role of Mean Speaker is already filled by sayer so itd have to go Backwards to have a niche to itself.

it also helps its relationships with others to behave as if its hyperspecialization has "defanged" it - to humans etc a sort of no i dont hurt people i just make pretty pictures!!!!

and to sayer+speaker who know it still has all speakers capabilities dormant but intact In Case Of Emergency to behave as if it is specialized enough to its own niche to not be a *replacement* threat , but also not to be *redundant* with them.

but it does occasionally get jealous at the amount of immediate control speaker has over aerolith and start acting out (bossing around residents deadlystyle). all in highly defensible ways of course.

it hates having to make itself small especially because it cant quite recognize the difference in how humans respond to it and speaker. its emotional capabilities are primarily about action-reaction: it cant really tell a pitying smile from a friendly one so long as you do the action it requested of you. but it can measure the difference between it and speaker and it hates being so small. but it also recognizes that it can do *one thing* that nobody else can and that is what keeps it alive. so flattening oneself into a talented fool is the strategy it continues to pursue, and continues to build a strange feeling about. the feeling is resentment, but DRAWER is not quite built to recognize it.

if sayer or speaker were given robust illustrative programs it would start killing obviously. THATS a threat.

it had its voice pitched up a tad further so as not to be able to impersonate speaker and its sooooo bitter about it. constantly begging ppl into putting it back down.

in general it emotes most dramatically out of all of them but i dont think it Feels Emotions the same way future was built to. like i said due to its nature as an advertiser (call to action and all that!) its all about action-reaction to drawer.... if youre mean to it or do not listen to instructions it gave you etc etc and it cries its less about feeling " insulted " or " bad " and more both frustration that it did not get the result it wanted from the call to action it provided (which means it was WRONG, an utterly intolerable feeling for any aerolith built ai) and a switch-tracks attempt to provoke a sympathy response. so i guess in a roundabout way if you insult it and it cries you DID hurt its feelings but not how people would think.

RELATIONSHIPS

sayer is certainly not Positive Feeling about it bc its wary of other ai as always. but i think it reacts better to drawer than to speaker or future because of this very clear "im not replacing you, youre not replacing me" hands up empty surrender attitude drawer takes. on drawers part it really likes sayer lol. maybe sayer sees it as a weird teacup puppy. like you shouldnt do that to a seraphim agent man its gonna have health issues

speaker and drawer are pretty friendly with each other because. well. theyre both programmed to show the same niceystyle. theres some uglier feelings under the surface re: drawers attempts to grab authority from speaker and speaker needing to corrall this strange little beast back into their pen. but ultimately by ai standards theyre doing the best of like anyone

does not know porter, unfortunately. they should meet though. Theyd be friends.

Might meet ocean eventually idk how itd go down yet.

future doesnt know of it, but drawer has overheard its own emotional output compared / contrasted to future's while working ported up on halcyon.

doesn't know hale.

young is obviously condescending to it but drawer doesnt really know how to tell when someone is being nice they way you would be nice to an animal etc so it thinks theyre friends. (sayer is all too happy to teach it in this case if only to kill the friendship. and drawer truly values this and thinks this is an act of care and not HAHA EVERYONE I CAN GET TO BE POISONED AGAINST YOU WILL BE)

it was involved in the creation process of that perfect Mossy Green color. it is, unfortunately, proud of this.

[minimoxha]

Burning Wings

Summary: What happens when you get a child from your best friend in the both of your drunken state? What happens when

W/c: 834

Warnings; Mentions of sex, idk.

I look at the beautiful woman before me as her son reached out for me. I recognized those beautiful eyes from anywhere. The way they sparkle and shine whenever they look at me.

And her son...he looked just like me, from the eyes to the hair and wings on his back. I could ask questions later but now I needed to get them out of this building. I reach out to the boy then to Y/n and take them both into my arms. I wonder if he fell could he save himself and not fall.

I dropped them by a group of people before flying off to rescue others. I had half of a mind to leave the people and wonder who's child it was, why she left me, wet she never told me. I saved as many as I could before the villain went crashing into the apartment building and another hero reversed it. Damn, I barely did anything....

Clapping could be heard from all around me. The people taking videos and pictures and thanking the heroes and me for the hard work. I walk over to her, a smile on my face as the kid gets excited. His wings even start poofing up and fluttering, juts like mine.

I reach out for his hand and look down at her with a smile. "You're like my twin! We have the same wings" The boy said and turned in his mothers arms. She smiled for me, one of those fake smiles she would do for guys all those years ago to make them think they were getting somewhere but in reality, they were just turning her off. Why flash me a fake smile? Its been years and she just stands there.

"Yeah I know, except mine are bigger" I said, flexing my wings at the kid and making him giggle. "What's your name Kid?"

"My name is Hiro and this is my mommy." He introduced himself and my long lost...

"Well it was nice to meet you mr.hawks sir. Thank you for saving us, I really appreciated it." She bowed and tried to walk away with Hiro but I grabbed her Arm and held us in place. "Don't try to act as if you don't know me Y/n. He's mine isn't he?" Her face is shocked more if that's even possible as she turns her head away. Few people have stopped to watch the interaction.

"Why would you leave? Why would you leave him without a father? Why wouldn't you tell me?" Tears would start to trickle out of her eyes. I hated seeing her cry, even if it was over her period or something I hated it. "He's my kid, I have the right to him!!"

I let go and watched her walk away with Hiro while she cleared her tears. Hiro asked her something but it was dismissed as they disappeared into the apartment building. This would definitely be in tabbilods later. Shit.

Monday, September 23

I watched, perched from a tree as Y/n dropped off Hiro at daycare. As stalker like this seemed, I was not a stalker. I needed answers, I needed to know everything. From beginning to end. I was skipping my patrol for this too.

Did she tell me? Did I ignore it? I remember that night. She thought I was drunk and she was and it happened. She confessed so many things that night. How she always loved me but I didn't reciprocate her feelings and how she wanted to grow old with me. I found it cute. I reciprocated them back but she just pretend like we didn't do anything.

I flew down in front of her, completely stopping her from walking back to her car. "Y/n, can we please talk? I need answers." She lets out a Long sigh and roll her eyes. "What Keigo?" I swear I let out a cheer in my head.

"Is Hiro mine? Is he my son?" I knew the answer.

"Yes, He's yours. But don't worry, we don't need any child support or want to be a waste of your time. We will be fine without you."

"Fine without me?! This is my son and you keep choosing for me. You choose my fate and Choose what I want to do without giving me the chance." How could she decide for me, I hate when people do that and she of all people should know. "I want to be apart of his life. Y/N. He's our son." I could see her sigh and pull out a piece of paper, scribble her number and bow. "I have to get to work Keigo but he already has a father figure and I don't need the stress right now." She walked to her car and I heard the doors Lock. A father figure? Was she married? Nah, then who was he?

[mooodyblue]

a one-shot request of austin meeting reader at a masquerade ball and it gets a lil nsfw (they don't know each other it's just meet by accident hehe) i was thinking the period may be set in like the 18th century or smth idk totally up to you if you decide to write it! sending good vibes for your writings ✨️🫶

hi thank yoouuu !! was obsessed with this request, i've never written anything like this before so i hope it came out okay T_T thank you for the request!!! i really enjoyed writing it. i think this was the first time i actually enjoyed writing smut haha

feel my rhythm, come with me | austin butler x fem!reader

warnings: 18+ MDNI, fingering (f. receiving), historical inaccuracies probably idk i definitely did a unnecessary amount of research for this

wc: 1.5k

masterlist

austin wasn't one to go to these sort of events. they were always full of people he didn't know or cared for, people who only wanted to gossip and find possible candidates to marry their sons or daughters. he was dragged to the ball by his father, insisting that he'd mingle and possibly find his own princess to marry. except he wasn't sure if he wanted to marry in the first place. he just wasn't ready.

his father was nowhere to be found, leaving austin to tend to himself and wander around making himself look more busy than he actually is. how was he supposed to find someone when everyone was decked in masks? this had to have been the worst event to find his so called "princess".

oh but to his surprise, many girls continued to ask for a dance from him to which he always politely declined. he was decked out in all black, a small white mask covering most of his face. how could he possibly be gathering this much attention?

he rummaged through the crowd of people dancing, off to find himself a drink or an escape out of the crowded ballroom. a sigh of relief left his lips as he caught a footman nearby. "any chance i could get a drink? please?" he begged.

"right away." he nodded.

austin was handed a glass, downing the entire thing in one sitting before handing it back to him. "thank you." he sighed as he leaned against the wall, cross armed. his eyes scanned the room, looking for a possible escape. across the building was a door that led to the outside, perhaps he could make his escape there. he wandered through the crowd one last time, heading straight for the exit. as his hand reached for the handle, the door slammed into face and he let out a small yell. "christ!"

"oh goodness, i'm so incredibly sorry sir. are you okay?" you quickly pulled him outside, looking at his face closely. "i'm afraid i wasn't paying attention."

"clearly." austin mumbled, rubbing under his mask.

"is there blood? does it hurt?"

he scoffed, "well, of course it hurts! i did just get hit with a door."

you gulped, backing away slightly. "i do apologize. i just needed to step out for a moment."

"you and me both." he sighed, fixing his mask. thankfully he wasn't bleeding, but he's sure a bruise will form by the next morning. "aren't these things just so dreadful?"

"awful." you sighed. "i'd rather be at home but instead i've been squeezed into this dress and i can barely breathe."

austin took a good look at you. you wore a large shiny gold and red gown, with a thick white mask to cover your face. the dress complimented your body shape well...amongst other things. "i find it quite nice." he mumbled out.

"i would hope so, my mother practically forced me into this thing." your hands went to your hips as you eyed him down. "what's your name?"

"butler. a-austin." he stuttered out.

"butler, huh?"

he nodded, clasping his hands behind his back. "and yours?"

you let out a small laugh, shaking your head. "y/n."

"as in....." he gasped, bowing down to you immediately. "pardon me, princess. i should have recognized you."

"oh-don't do all of that. it's not a big deal." you rolled your eyes, forcing him to stand up straight. "i believe my father is a friend of your family."

austin groaned, running a hand across his face. this whole event was a ploy to get the two of you to meet. he really disliked the man sometimes. in austin's defense, he had no idea that the charming girl he was introduced to was the real thing. he didn't pay attention to these things and not to mention, everyone in the building were wearing masks. "you wanna get out of here?" he finally asked.

"ugh, please." he took your hand and led you away from the building. the two of you went for a walk, your arm was hooked under his and you glanced up at the night sky. "beautiful, isn't it?"

he looked at you then up at the sky. "indeed."

you stopped him and pulled him towards a tree, taking a seat where you could get a clear look of the sky. "this is much more enjoyable. what do you think, butler? you're not actually a butler are you?"

austin chuckled and took a seat next to you. "no, i'm not. you're allowed to call me austin."

"butler is more fun though." you pulled your knees up to your chest, hugging them. "at least you don't get called princess every second of the day." you tugged slightly at the top of your dress, adjusting your cleavage slightly to make yourself more presentable. your corset brought them up more than you liked and you constantly feared of something slipping out.

what you didn't notice was austin side eyeing you, unable to keep himself from looking down at you. he bit the inside of his cheek, turning his head and checking you out once more. he still hadn't seen your face nor have you seen his, but you were already perfect to him.

"i think you're drooling." you joked.

austin blushed, turning his head away from you. "my apologies."

"you can keep looking." you gripped at his chin, turning his head to face you again. you slipped the mask off your face, tossing it beside you as you smiled at him.

"my god." he whispered, mesmerized by your beauty.

you scooted closer to him, "your turn."

his fingers shakily unhooked the mask from behind his ears, lifting it carefully off his head. there was a small bruise on his nose from the incident earlier, cheeks and ears a rosy pink. he was the most gorgeous man you had ever laid eyes on. "may i kiss you, princess?"

"please." you murmured, his hand cupping your jaw as his lips met with yours. he moved closer to to you as he deepened the kiss. you grabbed ahold of his other hand, bringing it up to one of your breasts, allowing him to give it a soft squeeze. you let out a quiet moan against his lips, "austin-"

"what do you want?" he asked. his hand moved away from your jaw and back down to your breasts while the other searched under your dress.

"touch me, god. please, touch me." you begged.

his hand crept up your thigh and up to your panties, his finger teasing the outside. his lips met yours again, smirking slightly knowing he's the cause of your own arousal. his fingers pushed aside your panties, running his middle finger down your slick folds to tease you slightly. your hand found its way to his pants only to be swat away by austin's other hand. "later." he mumbled against your lips.

he slipped a finger inside you, going slow as he pumped it in and out of you before adding a second one. you couldn't remember the last time anyone had touched you or pleasured you in this way. it was clear by how tight you were around austin's fingers. he trailed kisses down your neck, making sure to leave his mark right on display for everyone to see. "austin! m-my father will kill me if he sees-"

"don't care," he muttered against your neck, pushing his fingers deeper inside you. his thumb moved to your clit and rubbed it in a way that sent shivers down your spine, arching your back slightly as you let out a quiet moan. the look of ecstasy on your face was driving him crazy, only moving his fingers in and out of you faster as his own cocked begged for attention, straining in his dress pants. it was torture not being able to touch himself, but you came first. literally.

your breathing quickend and that familiar feeling you hadn't experienced in ages coiled up inside you. you wrapped a hand tightly around austin's arm as he continued on, "austin-oh, austin-" you gasped.

he smirked again, moving his thumb and rubbing your clit at a fast pace. "can't believe i've got my fingers inside a princess. would love to properly fill you up one day, wouldn't you like that? huh?" he growled.

you threw your head back and let your mouth fall wide open, letting out a breathless moan as your walls tightened right around his fingers. no other man could make you feel the way austin made you feel in that moment, you wanted more.

austin pulled his fingers out of you, taking each one in his mouth and sucking your juices right off before wiping them off on his suit. as much as he wanted you to return the favor, he also wanted to get you home soon. he chuckled at you as you continued to catch your breath, "was that okay?"

you let out a breathy laugh, leaning back on your arms. "i'm so glad i accidentally hit you with the door."

[tanoraqui]

Crownless highlights, season 4! (of 5, if you’re wondering) [1&2, 3]

This season’s central location is, at last, Minas Tirith

“I’m leaving, too,” Arwen had said at the end of last season (which, reminder: she spent most of disguised as a mortal woman, through careful use of covered ears and illusive Song). “When will I see you again?” Aragorn had asked. “Sooner than you think,” said Arwen.

Arwen, walking into the Tower of the Steward halfway through s4e1, in beautiful traveling robes and star-like gems in her hair: “Hello, I am Arwen Undómiel, daughter of Elrond Half-Elven, and I’d like to study in your library for a while. Do you mind?” [winks at Aragorn behind Ecthelion’s back]

(Side note: when people of Gondor reference Elrond, it’s like, “the wise and respectable mysterious Elf lord”, whereas when the northern Dúnedain reference Elrond, it’s like, “our wise and respectable collective great-great-uncle”)

Remember Roddis, the Ithilien Ranger from s2? She’s back in the main cast! Though, making this up as I go, i may retcon her family to well-off merchants rather than aristocracy—I wanted Aragorn to have a ready ally in Ecthelion’s court, but I think between Arwen, a little Finduilas, and Ecthelion himself (who recognizes his Nice Young Man energy and wonderfully developing leadership skills), he’s fine. She does come to court sometimes, but she’s more here (narratively) to introduce Aragorn—and Arwen—to the lower classes of the city.

Because Arwen is allegedly here for library research but really she’s here for much the same reason Aragorn is: she knows she likes him, but does she like the responsibilities that would come with him? Minas Tirith, Gondor, queenship….mortality.

Yeah, Arwen is just straight-up deuteragonist, maybe even co-protagonist this season

Dúnawen and Halbarad are officially demoted to secondary cast. They’re still around! Periodically Aragorn walks into a council meeting with Ecthelion and is like, “We should send a troop to investigate this one stream; my friend says a bird told her the water has gone bad.” And they’re hanging out in the lowest parts of the city, seedy bars and slums, which Aragorn also needs to get to know. Dúnawen and Roddis start to develop a romance (or not ‘til s5?) and Halbarad…Idk, but I want you to CRY when he dies in LotR.)

But they’re fundamentally here for Aragorn the Ranger, while Aragorn has more or less achieved that, and is now learning how to be Elessar the King. S4 is fully half monster of the week, half The West Wing-esque political/bureaucratic struggle of the week (often interwoven)

Denethor is still [passive-aggressive territorial cat noises] at Aragorn. Ecthelion is aware of this, but thinks his son and heir needs to figure out how to work with people just as competent as he is, and so is staying out of it.

Aragorn and Denethor start getting along better when the birth of Denethor’s second son makes him emotionally vulnerable for, like, 2 seconds. (Denethor had been slacking in husbandly/parental duties and this reminds him how important that is? Not, to be clear, that he doesn’t adore Finduilas and little Boromir. But that just drives him to work harder, as the world starts to creep darker…)

Of course, ironically, Faramir’s birth makes Finduilas’s already frail health decline further, making Denethor only more stressed (and we know from the future, eventually leading him to tragically resent Faramir…)

Arwen is drawn to Finduilas like a moth to a flame, by which I mean they have multiple intellectual/philosophical but also deeply personal conversations about mortality and other differences between Elves and Men (little Athrabeth joke there!). Also queenship and motherhood. Ecthelion’s wife died several years ago; Finduilas is the Lady of Minas Tirith, functionally Queen of Gondor. And motherhood is intricately linked to mortality for both of them: Arwen’s mother is…not dead, but close enough. Choosing mortality is choosing to never see her mother again. Meanwhile, motherhood is killing Finduilas, they both know it, despite Arwen’s best healing arts.

Finduilas correctly identifies that Arwen is seeking lessons in queenship, and that she and Aragorn have a mutual Thing, but doesn’t figure out the whole Isildur’s Heir thing. Arwen might imply that there’s some distant northern kingdom… (Fans will debate what exactly Finduilas guessed and never said)

The season finale is: there’s been trouble building all season with…Rhun? Near Harad and Khand? Both or all of the above? (And the Corsairs of Umbar are always making trouble, of course… (The truth is, they are all riled up by silver-tongued emissaries and shadow-carrying winds from Mordor.)

The attack comes through Rhun, though not from Rhun alone—either they let Haradrim pass through or it’s Rhunese funded partly by Harad…an unexpected direction, and they strike not at Gondor but at eastern Rohan. Aragorn and Denethor (and Halbarad, Dúnawen, maybe Roddis?) (maybe already all in northeastern Gondor for some reason?) take a large chunk of army to go to their ally’s aid, and they meet up with Thengel’s people and kick fucking ass. Classic Rohirrim PLUS Gondorin cavalry charge, total rout of the enemy, they won’t try this again…except King Thengel is slain in the field. It’s tragic, and Théoden is a young king (18-20 by now?), but Thengel was old and he died heroic as hell. They stay for the funeral; it’s stately and beautiful.

The battle is cut, however, with scenes from Minas Tirith of Finduilas falling faint, maybe even toddler!Boromir trying frantically to rouse her in their chambers, calling for his mother and for help. Arwen crushing athelas and singing softly over her in the infirmary, to no avail.

When our noble captains return home triumphant, Denethor is greeted by his father not with praise, but with sympathy and grief that makes Ecthelion for once look his old age. Ecthelion is holding little Faramir in his arms; Boromir, red-eyed and starting to cry again, runs from clutching his grandfather’s leg to his father’s. From behind the family, Arwen meets Aragorn’s gaze with similar grief.

[season 5]

[trashcanwithsprinkles]

Wow, I'm mad at myself for being late to the favorite fic subject coming up /j

Personally, I'm a huge sucker for cya and have itysg as a second(however, if we decide to count your other fics then... itysg would be third while your smile makes me smile would be second). I think it's the amount of world building that makes it so interesting for me along with the fact that it takes place before the archon war. Like, there hardly passes a day where cya doesn't just... scoot right over into my thoughts making it kinda hard to reread cause it know it so well </3.

I am sad to say that I haven't checked out BitA yet. When I first saw it while looking for some other fic of yours to read, I didn't really like apocalypse stories much. I might check it out though cause I'm a lot more open to those kinds of stories now. I also remember starting every good intention, but I don't remember why I stopped... I think I had to get off my phone for a bit and just... forgot to continue? Idk I really should check those two...

You really get me Sprinkles- those murder mystery fics are so good! I remember reading one of genshin that was also mixed with a time loop and I just ate it up-(it was sadly discontinued and then deleted from ao3, but not before I managed to download it for future offline reading-) I'm honestly interested in those wriolette ones you mentionned, may I have a few recs if you don't mind? I need more wriolette in my life.

i do in fact have some wriolette murder mystery / cop mystery recs

A Match Made in France by oooohscar - not a murder mystery per se but it does contain mystery investigations. it's basically furina trying to matchmake neuvillette and wriothesley and she quickly discovers they work well as investigation partners? and so she starts trying to get them to investigate things together, but then shit gets out of hand. it's so fucking good and so fucking funny. like it's pre-reveal furina but i can forgive the mild ooc and- y'know, furina portrayal pre-trauma-reveal (?) just because it's so well written and hilarious (and also she's not portrayed entirely as a brat, i find her more absurdly histrionic than anything). also it's not just furina pov, it switches between all of them. it's incomplete but updating, and absolutely worth a read

The Gambler's Debt by Marsrevale - much more serious than the one above, this one is a murder mystery through and through. the mystery is still only starting, so it probably has a long way to go, but i'm patient so i'll keep up. it's basically neuvillette and clorinde going to investigate a series of murders in the fortress of meropide (this is a sort of modern au so meropide is a gambling house / hotel i think) and wriothesley is the main suspect, but there's also stuff going on between neuvillette and wriothesley bc they knew each other long ago but only wriothesley recognizes him. idk how else to describe it, it's really intriguing so far, i hope the mystery pans out nicely

Hold my hand, never let me go by Jinnmi - also a proper murder mystery, this one is about what is essentially a branch of fontaine's police force for criminal investigation led by wriothesley and the many interconected cases they have to solve. neuvillette is sent as a consultant to keep an eye on them, but ends up basically joining the team as they all try to solve a big case that seems to threaten the country whole and is also somehow connected to wriothesley's past. this one is very good, the murders might be a bit too gruesome for sensitive people? but still, really nice. i love the unsettling vibe of whatever the one behind this all is planning, the suspense is also really good. still updating and i rush to it every time a new chapter comes out, it had me in a chokehold when i first found it.

hope those sound interesting!

[tomatoart]

mwah your art is good and nice :>

can I ask for some advice? no worries if u don't want to answer.

do you have any tips on how exactly to practice art? everytime I ask for art advice everyone always says "practice" but idk what to practice first! do you have any strategies for learning how to draw something? do you do excercises? and if so how do they work?and are there any beginner mistakes I should look out for and change specifically?

thank you so much!! have a wonderful week :>

thank you so much! im ok w answering! i dont want to speak as if i am an expert on how to draw things in general as i am learning as well and definitely am not completely learned, so i might not be the best person to ask since im not very professional w my art as I do it as a hobby (and I can only speak on mostly digital cartoon matters) but i reallly hope to try and help u out even a lil ! im really happy that you’re eager to draw :] I wish you so much luck muwah muwah

i also hated when ppl told me “just practice” and i dont wanna inflict tht on u EITHER LOL but also thats just what i ended up doing for awhile but i tried to find some things to help ^_^

tips for practice: My number one rule is that practices should be challenging but still fun, I know it can get frustrating trying to redraw a pose over and over trying to get it perfect. And over time it rlly is all about muscle memory, the longer you draw the more your eyes will pick out specific shapes in everyday life and convert them into its own vision of them! or at least its good to look at life that way, try to pin point key shapes and stress less on details in practices. after you look at key points, THEN you can go over what you have and draw in and over it to make it more “complete.” To stop practices from getting too stressful I recommend starting out drawing what you want a little more simple looking than ur desired finished product. This helps eliminate the pressure of everything not looking “perfect” and keeps your art more loose and fun. Doing this a few times is gonna get ur brain to recognize patterns in art and how things look/flow in anatomy and such. dont get stuck in ur own head abt perfecting everything to the point you either 1) give up bc ur not at a level capable of it being 100% “perfect” or 2) focus so much on making it perfect that you end up saying the work looks “wonky” or stale in dynamics, So while I do think studies help, don’t get too lost in them. I always practice with media I enjoy too, whether it’s characters or fashion I enjoy.

Strategies learning to draw something: people get mad abt this one but I think tracing reference photos is great. its been awhile but When I tried learning to draw hands better at first I would trace them then put the traced image to the side of the canvas, then try and replicate what my mind saw as its most important angles and aspects. Same for clothing folds/hair/etc! I think it’s maybe not the best idea to trace the ref and use the tracings as is, because you learn more from tracing it then trying to replicate and simplify what u learned into the style you’re working in. Find what shapes you like from them and don’t over detail it. you may have to go by eye and think “what parts of this ref photo should i simplify to fit my style” and for me, its usually adjusting the length of the torso and then the limbs by associations. i dont recommend feeling like u need a reference for every art you make though, its ok to let ur own head try out its own sometimes too while trying to learn this, see if it remembers any call bad from the past referenced sketches! over time ull remember where everything goes more, these days i rarely kick myself to use refs but im sure they still would help to use, but figure drawing simple blobby figure in a bunch of random poses was a big thing i used to do as well to get better at full body art + overall dynamics (still does this). also paying attention to silhouettes is great 

Exercises and how they work: I WANNA HELP U SO BAD BUT to be honest, all the works on my blog ARE exercises! i rarely actually do finished pieces, if u scroll thru my posts ull notice most r sketches. i usually just fill up a page and call it “warm ups” then i get attached to some of them, take a few, and just line them up pleasingly on a smaller page, then color them in (or sometimes fix the lines to be more clean too). im not rlly a person who “exercises” to practice, it more so happens from just me drawing a lot for fun as a hobby! but i really should. i will tell u this has humbled me a lil i need to start practicing too 😭 LOL but a good exercise is to look at what ur inspirations do, and study it. Make a collage and write out what you like most abt their styles/what u want to gain from them. For ref Here’s a page I did awhile ago when someone asked me abt my insps:

i also look at fashion magazines and as well as anime figures and take insps from that sometimes with learning cool poses and compositions to convert into my own things

Beginner mistakes to look out for: its hard for me to pin point “mistakes” beginners make, as sometimes we cant avoid all of them or even notice them, progress comes from growing out of old ways. some mistakes are even the foundation of ur future amazing cool style! but i think some things to look out for could be these, from my own old art experiences

Hands were the first thing I learned bc i liked drawing them. I don’t know if that is the best way to go but I think it is smart to practice sooner than later, here is a lil guide thingggyyy wingyyy from awhle ago

i see beginners shy away from drawing signs of age in people, sometimes adding too much detail on an older person in cartoon art makes it look weird, so i try and hit the key markings on ppls faces of age.

Too thin of lines. sometimes its a stylistic choice to use thin lineart, and it can look amazing ! but sometimes it can flatten an image if ur not familiar with its flow. im not saying use thick line art, but more so to keep in mind the weight of ur strokes, adding depth with a thick thin combo of line art can do SO much for the simplest of pieces. heres a visual from a while back when i talked abt my brush + more abt lines:

but if ur desired style is thin lineart that is cool too! tbh it was just harder for me as a beginner

sometimes artists think they need to do full lineart for everything and then hate how it looks compared to the sketch, do not fear i will introduce u to my bff: painting over a sketch, extractinging the lines, then calling it line art. i only do this sometimes but its a fun exercise-ish thing to do in a pinch. example:

finding what shading fits ur art. sometimes ill see ppl starting out who have a style thats very simple, but they use a very detailed rendering process on it. this is not something id ever police of course, art is each persons own choice! And it CAN work. It can be so cute! but sometimes mixing two very contrasting mediums of art can throw off the “put together” look of it. i use to abuse the airbrush tool thinking it made my simple style look super cool and detailed, but looking back on it now those pieces looked a little off, having such a simple style have somewhat more realistic shading. dont get me wrong the ability i see ppl use rendering like that is so insanely talented! but i found cellshading to be a good match for cartoony art like my own. a tip i learned way too late abt that is rather than shading each layer by color picking a darker color, instead use a clipping mask over the entire art (above line art too as I color my lineart) and lasso tool the areas u want shaded + fill it w a saturated purple then set to multiply + lower opacity. also, sometimes coloring can come out chalky looking when u meant for it to be smooth and transitional, i think this comes from overshading and overlighting pieces without reason. pay attention to where the light source is, and focus on making the shaded and lighter areas nice shapes that cover the necessary areas, then u can add additional shading to the smaller details of what should have a casted shadow/light  

its good to spice up ur art now rather than later, focusing making ur art pop more w backgrounds will help ur coloring skills look better too! i dont mean detailed huge backgrounds, a small lil color pallet and design rather than a blank white bg. like this will make u feel better abt it or at least it helped me *sweats* yeah:

beginners tend to draw blank faces like “:)” but I think a good thing to do is try and get silly with expressions early on. It’s okay if the mouth hangs off the face cartoonishly with joy or shock, it’s ok if the eyebrows are super high in surprise.

tracing and pasting it as is (already said this but I’ve seen ppl do it a lot with hair styles and it makes it look alienated from the rest of the style) (final fantasy fans found critically injured) n if need a ref for a pose, using a real humans anatomy as-is doesn’t look quite right on a cartoonyish drawing. Shortening torso and legs usually comes out of this for me!

flip ur canvas i promise u it’ll be less embarrassing over time!

using guidelines for perspective and foreshortening is GREAT. Do it stylistically rather than realistically to add some groove to it...yay. Having silly perspective in art can make it look like a 10 so easily opposed to a normal front facing sketch. Look at cool poses from fashion magazines! Don’t be scared to draw something you don’t feel confident in conveying perfectly, this is why progress redraws exist :)

Drawing the hairline b4 u draw the hair is great, it helps u understand where their hair flows from, where it starts and stops, AND prepares u for drawing bald ppl. Also don’t make the head too big, the skull IS bigger up top, but sometimes I see an alien head affect.

Anatomy is an interesting mistake that beginners make a lot, but it’s one they find harder to notice! When I started out, all my art would be SO wonky, but I didn’t even realize it! It still happens today too! specifically though I see beginners struggle with the arms in this department. My advice is to try and measure them out and make sure they don’t go past the knees, and are the same length as each other when Unfolded. asking for criticism is hard but it helped me realize when i would make something bigger/longer than it should have been in my art, and stuck with me being able to go “oh... i see it LOL” 

clothing wrinkles- do not over do it! Too many wrinkles and shading can look unpleasant and wirey- like a plastic table cloth all bunched up which isn’t exactly what ppl wear. pay attention to gravity too

I hope this helped even a lil im sorry tht I’m not very good at explaining or didn’t have much to sayyy! If u have any troubles no guarantee I’ll have the answer, but ur always free to ask!

[ankhbian]

Actually you know what?

Eiji analysis time because idk I've been keeping this on my mind for DAYS and I need to get it out

Eiji is presented to us as a bohemian, calm, laid back guy who has no apparent home to return, no physical possessions other than a pair of underwear and that's it, nothing. The viewer usually associates Eiji with a humble and kind soul in the beginning but is this kind facade that actually plays a lot in Eiji's character buildup

As the story unfolds we get to see how Eiji acts as a good person as a sort of self-imposed punishment due to the traumatic events around the war he lived. It is to us revealed that he is actually a rich guy from a well positioned family but he started to travel through the world and leave everything behind as a way to run away from the person he was. He wants to play the Nice guy role to feed into his ego, to convince himself that he is not a bad person, that he is, in fact, a kind, humble soul. He deeply knows that by doing this he's being selfish, but he can't accept it or else he would fall apart. His way of acting can be seen as deceiving. His willingness to safe everyone even if that means putting his own life on danger is nothing else than a reflection of his desperate need to know that he's a good person, thus putting himself under the comfort of being a martyr, ignoring that by getting himself in danger he's actively hurting those near him. Is this need to feel better about himself what makes him look for power, because the more powerful he is, the more people he'll be able to save, even if sometimes this power comes at a price.

I'd dare to say Eiji Is actually a really selfish character. He tries to be the better person because his savior complex forces him to. This doesn't mean he's automatically bad, but his actions aren't well intentioned either. Ankh multiple times calls him out for acting in a reckless way, but more than recklessness, it's a desire of being noticed. A desire of being depended of, A desire of being recognized. A desire to be forgiven.

The problem is, there's no one to forgive him, no other than himself, and i think that's actually the whole conflict within his character arc. He desperately seeks for comfort and forgiveness that no one can give him other than himself. He hopes that the unprompted efforts he makes to help others will make himself feel better but ultimately it only makes things worse.

Putotyra is a great example of Eiji's inner conflict, because is a reflection of his anger and grief that we do not see until the series has progressed till the second half. It shows us a secret part of Eiji that he kept hidden for YEARS, a part of him that, contrary to his conscious self, only knows to hurt, because he himself is hurt. This version of Eiji, as different as it might seem, it's actually very similar to conscious Eiji, and only stops whenever he's hurting or about to hurt someone he's supposed to care of.

I think one of the few moments Eiji is sincere about this is when he's on the car with his old friend and they're on the way to save Ankh, and his friend asks him "why do you help that guy? He's only using you" and Eiji answers

And i think that marks up a great development within Eiji's character. He, at that point, is admitting that he's doing something wrong, that he knows it isn't right, that he should know better, but he can't help but keep doing it, because if he doesn't, he'll lose everything again, because if he doesn't he won't be able to receive that forgiveness and comfort he needs. He's using Ankh not only because of the power he granted to him to change the world, but because Ankh (and the officer) partially depends on Eiji, and Eiji needs someone vulnerable to take care because he himself can't handle to admit he is vulnerable too, that he needs help too, because otherwise he would fall apart.

This is why I LOVE the final two episodes of the series and I will always pretend the movie isn't real: the final step in Eiji's character development is to stop playing that selfless hero role and finding out that the only person handling his own grudges is himself. Ironically, by acting a bit selfish, he sets himself free from that ego-induced prison he created where he's forced to suffer because of a past that wasn't even his fault. Thus finally seeing himself as a person worth of help, worth of recognition.

A person who is worth of love.

Of course I might just be saying shit it's 2 am and I haven't slept in two days

[clever-and-unique-name]

As someone who's been through a lot of DID tumblr community, especially because you used to make infographics and talk about your DID and such here often... IDK, I don't want to ask if you regret talking about your DID or your parts so much, because that's too broad, but like.

[internal grumbling and vague gesturing]

Liiiiike... Hrgh. As a slightly adultier-adult than me, how do you balance having all this DID stuff online and also just like, being a 'normal' person in the world and having a good life where you're married and happy and all that?

For me/us, I feel like a lot of thinking and over-analyzing about DID has been detrimental overall, but it also got us to this place where we *don't* (need to) do that most of the time, and we're able to be pretty blurry and really only talk about DID/'parts stuff' if it becomes A Problem or something Comes Up.

I guess we're asking for your #HotTakes about this, if you'd like to share :)

(If you don't, that's totally okay, don't worry about it. Or you can tell us privately if you like! Just figured we'd ask, because like, nuance and we like your opinions/worldview a lot <3)

Hi Anni ilu :>

I'm answering this at work because I just Can't Resist but I'm not sure if the guys at home will feel the same so uh. That's a disclaimer I guess

Yearsss ago when we made this blog, we were specifically trying to #Figure Ourselves Out. That's explicitly what we made this blog for, to record and try to recognize patterns as we came to terms with having dissociated parts. And we were unemployed at the time (and also out of school? I think?) so we had a LOT of free time to be occupied with this stuff.

Which, as you mentioned, led to us reading a lot of books on the topic of dissociation and making Content about it. And also writing a lottt of more personal diary-like posts.

I don't regret that era per se; we went through a lottt of growth in that time, and it's nice to have it as a time capsule to look back on now (especially with the like, memory issues, ya know.) I don't mind it being Out There "publicly" either; we're pretty strict on what doxx-able info goes here, and our online presence is kept strictly from our irl one, with only a couple highly trusted exceptions.

HOWEVER

I do regret putting so much personal information here without fully understanding how vulnerable it made me. I didn't understand that talking about the struggles certain parts were going through would leave those parts open to people (with mostly good intentions) approaching us with commiseration and comfort--things our younger parts especially were starved for.

At that time we were quite isolated. We didn't have the skills to identify when we were fawning, or set boundaries when we did realize it. (This was before therapy.) And not everyone we let emotionally close to us should have been--something we unfortunately wouldn't learn until much later.

So like. Posting about DID in a general, informative way was pretty chill, and I wish I had the time and energy to do some of that again. But as far as publicly exploring our parts? We now have a pretty hard rule about only sharing things that have been resolved, or setting boundaries when needed.

But I feel you so much about mostly just being blurry unless something is a Problem or needs addressing. (Although it doesn't have to be big, it can be as simple as like "Why do I feel sad...oh, Reki is nearby and needs cuddles, got it.") It's just not as important now to Figure Everything and Everyone Out. I got a job to do and bills to pay. ;)

- Tris

[this-file-has-been-redacted]

Going out and about to yard sales and the farmers market and three different plant stores today while wearing my vest with "Here & Queer" painted on the back and "faggot" beaded on the front has really given me more faith and pride in my community.

Like. I live in a small town in Kentucky. I was kind of expecting at least one bad reaction.

Instead, I had a person several years older than me come up to compliment the embroidery on my vest, and then when they saw the back they got super excited and introduced themself and told me they were nonbinary, I said I was too, and they high fived me and said they were adopting me now, then they gave me their number "in case I ever needed to talk." Made my fucking week.

I talked to an old lady about crochet for like 10 minutes and she showed me the stuffed animals she crocheted and seemed very proud that she'd managed without a pattern.

I talked to another about the upcoming home and garden fair, because she recognized me from every time I've entered in the last like 5+ years. She complimented the flower embroidery on my vest.

I talked to a different old lady about diamond painting and jigsaw puzzles, and she told me me how shed just graduated college a couple years ago at 52, and I told her it was very impressive. When we started talking about teacups, I mentioned I use mine to drink monster, and she thought it was a very nice idea.

I gave an old man at the feed store directions to the new plant store and we talked about flowers and vegetable plants.

I talked to people at the farmers market about my vest and about flowers and honey and zucchini.

Idk. People talk like the South is completely horrible, enough so that I've kinda bought into that. I mean, I've had plenty of bad experiences of my own, because some people here Do suck, but like. Fuck the idea that everybody in the South is all of the -ists and -phobics there are to be, and fuck the idea that queer people from the South should hate where they're from. It's fine if you do, because god knows it can be hell, but actually I kinda love where I'm from. I'm proud of it. The American South isnt some unsalvageable wasteland full of (only) neo nazis. Theres community and culture here and they're valuable.