#Like I know exactly how this shit goes now

[eddiemunson-reader-shame]

Good Morning Hawkins I Have Dad!Eddie Munson Headcanons

Why are we as a society not talking about Stay At Home Dad Eddie?

I know we want our little domestic fantasies. But this man consistently says “fuck the system” every day. No forced conformity in this private domicile.

If you’ve got the drive to want to work after having the kid, he volunteers to stay home and take care of the baby.

Honestly, with his reputation it might be easier should you decide to stay in Hawkins because you’re the face of the relationship. It might actually be harder for him to find a job in town than it might be for you.

He also 100% cleans up his act, stops selling, and goes on the straight and narrow after having a kid. He doesn’t want baby reaching into cabinets and getting into things they shouldn’t get into.

He may still sell a little grass on the side, but he keeps it hidden in the van where little fingers can’t access it.

Eddie might not be the best housekeeper, but god dammit he tries. Like, he will genuinely try over and over to get things right even if it kills him. You don’t have to worry about weaponized incompetence with him.

He’ll start having favorite brands of cleaning products, favorite brands of formula and diapers, and he might get fussy if you bring the wrong ones home.

He’s a nerd. Plain and simple. He’ll be picking up Dustin in the van and taking little munchkin to the library to find any kind of book in relation to parenting, cooking, etc.

I can see Eddie actually becoming a very competent cook. He even makes the kid’s meals into fun little shapes for their lunchboxes.

Fun finger foods is his main staple when he’s not being Betty Crocker.

Literally does not care how he looks, he’ll push the most dolled up little stroller around Hawkins in broad daylight. He’ll wander out to Bradley’s in a polkadot apron and a pink baby sling. And when the kid is old enough to play salon with daddy, he’s gonna wander out in public with anything from pink scrunchies and glitter polish to a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles backpack and magic marker on his face.

I can see Eddie being a little shit and purposely buying the most girly pink items for the baby when they’re little, no matter the gender.

He likes wearing pink in public. It pisses off the conservative parents who see him and the kid coming.

The only thing is you have to have a serious talk with him about is smoking around the kid, because Eddie’s one flaw may be that he’s got the propensity to be a cigarette mom. (It’s the late 80’s, and this was reality for a lot of older Millennials.)

So throw away his Camels and pay Dustin to tail him with a fire extinguisher.

Dustin is going to be Parent Number 3 in this relationship. I’m sorry but it’s reality.

Has absolutely no idea how to take care of a baby but is willing to learn.

Eddie would probably have to reschedule D&D nights with his buddies, because money would be hella tight now that the two of you have a little gremlin and one income. So you can’t exactly pay a sitter.

But he loves to make campaigns based on the stories he tells to the baby during bedtime.

RIP to y’all but once you have that baby, Uncle Wayne’s gonna refuse to let you and Eddie move out. He’s gonna change his work schedule too so he can spend time with the baby.

It would probably take a lot of overtime and a bit of Eddie’s extra side hustle, but the single wide is eventually going to get upgraded to a two bedroom double wide.

Uncle Wayne will insist on giving you, Eddie and the baby the master bedroom. Hell, he might even try to give the kid his bedroom.

Eddie is going to fucking refuse to let his uncle sleep in the living room of the new double wide.

Eddie might also become a little codependent on the kid. School will be a nightmare, because he’ll suddenly be alone in the trailer all day and chain smoke waiting for the kiddo to come home from school.

[suzukiblu]

Thank-you sentences for Ten; Billy adopts Conner and it actually goes pretty good! (( chrono || non-chrono ))

Billy, technically, is the kind of person that someone like Superman would literally never even notice when he’s not Captain Marvel. But he’s seen Superman notice exactly that kind of person more times than he can even count, and not say anything patronizing or pitying either to their faces or about them after, and it’s always . . . 

He doesn’t really know how to explain what that feels like to Lynn, he thinks. The wisdom of Solomon is not necessarily, like, the “emotional intelligence” of Solomon. Or at least, not in a way where Billy can always figure out how to explain what he’s thinking to other people. And feelings are so subjective anyway, so–well, yeah. It just gets complicated, and Billy doesn’t even know if Lynn even understands what he’s feeling all that often yet, considering, much less what other people are. He’s still brand-new, and he still mostly just knows what he’s been told, and on top of that Cadmus mostly told him stupid shit, too. 

A lot of stupid shit, it seems like. 

“Important,” Lynn echoes, and then–frowns, a little. “But not ‘valuable’?” 

“Like–everybody’s important,” Billy says, and shrugs again as he sets the plates on the counter next to the stove and starts scooping the veggies onto them. Though maybe he should’ve started with the salmon, because now there’s veggies rolling everywhere, so–shit, okay, this is fine, he can do this and still talk like, all reasonably and normally and stuff. “Not everybody’s got, I dunno, a net worth or a specialized skillset or super-helpful superpowers or anything like that. Or a price tag, I guess. Metaphorically and all.” 

“Eight point two billion,” Lynn says abruptly, his voice clipped. 

“Huh?” Billy wrinkles his nose at him. “What’s–?” 

“Me,” Lynn says, still clipped. “Eight point two billion USD."

[rrosamariaa]

I've been thinking a lot about a remus/sirius Ministry of Magic office AU..

Often I see ppl talking about what would Sirius work with if there wasn't a war going on and he could just live his life in peace and one of my favorite headcanons is that he would be an 'Unspeakable'. Those are the ppl that work in the department of mysteries, that by itself is one of coolest things in the wizarding world, according to me. The department of mysteries is responsible for confidential studies of death, love, time etc (A lot of crazy things that honestly no one should have to mess with but obvs they do anyways...) It's high-level security place, no one besides the researchers are allowed in those chambers. No one even knows who are those researchers and what they do, actually.

Buut, its sirius we are talking about and the guy is a genius but also can be pretty reckless and, in this specific scenario, I think he would be a borderline "crazy scientist" so. He fucks up down the line. I don't know what he does, exactly, but it's something that put his and others researchers' lives at risk. Bc of that, he is sent to work in a waaay more mundane department: Magical Accidents and Catastrophes. It's a cool department!! Remember that first poa scene where harry turns aunt marge into a balloon etc? well those are the guys who they call to fix that. They even have a Obliviators division, responsible for changing Muggles' memory in case they are exposed to accidental magic. Those guys are full of themselves and annoying as hell, btw.

and I see Sirius being sent there, after The Accident. It's cool in theory, but most of the time it's puuuure paperwork and it bores sirius to no end.

well, guess who works there as well. Our guy, Remus j. lupin.

Remus isn't one to do field work so he mostly works in the Muggle-Worthy Excuse Committee division (god I love those long ass names). Basically he comes up with stuff to excuse magic happening in the muggle world etc. like when peter killed a bunch of muggles and the muggle paper said it was a "big gas explosion". Pure paperwork. Boring as hell.

Anyway, Sirius turns up there out of nowhere and he is the office sweetheart. It fucking boggles remus mind, like. Sirius always goes to the office parties and seems to be friends with everyone but no one knows anything about this guy. He just gets there, a almost 30 yo with a bunch of obscure work experience and no one knows what he did before that, who his family is, where he is from and how the hell does he knows the stuff that he knows.

Sirius is great at field work, he mostly works directly in the Obliviators division and remus is really great with the paperwork stuff sooo they get paired up a lot. At first, they are a bit annoyed by each other (my fav wolfstar flavor). It's funny because they actually agree with almost everything but they just approach things veeery differently and so they are bickering all the damn time. And Sirius is a Certified Little Shit™ and is constantly doing things that drives remus a bit crazy. Once they had a case of a water fountain exploding bc two wizards were fighting in a public park and instead of obliviating the muggles into believing it was only a piping problem or whatever, he went out of his way to turn it into a sort of elaborate flash mob that went viral on tiktok. Remus spent the night awake documenting everything. He wanted to strangle sirius that day.

between late nights working and lots of crazy field work (thanks to sirius) those two end up getting closer and closer. Remus still thinks Sirius is a bit insane, but now in a I-want-you-to-fuck-me-into-this-desk type way. Sirius, on the other hand, doesn't let go of his previous research. I think that back then he would, specifically, study and experiment a lot with Love, in special familial love (yep.) The thing about those confidential dept. of mysteries' experiments is that they can be pretty... unethical. And that's the break point of their story: Remus finding out about Sirius research and finally wondering at what lengths did sirius went to understand something as complicated as Love and what the fuck he did to get banished from the department back then, and worse: if he ever used remus in those experiments. and even more worse: The fact that remus doesn't stop loving him even if he did.

A last fun fact is that they, at one point, would have an inside joke about that "MIB: man in black" movie, they watched it together one late night and sirius kept referencing it when he went to obliviate muggles and remus thought it was the funniest silliest thing ever

[pedroshotwifey]

Ok, random idea for drabble:

Overprotective girldad! Frankie

He and the guys get together to size up/intimidate the guy coming by to pick up his daughter for a date. 😅

Okay I'm really kind of loving this idea 🤣

Think I had way too much fun with it!

W/C: 660

Overprotective girldad!Frankie (G)

They could be doing anything right now. Bowling, flying, fishing, hiking, shooting pool, drinking—well, you get the idea. They could be doing anything on this cool Friday night, but the former Delta Team boys are sitting around the island in Frankie’s cramped kitchen, waiting for his daughter’s date to show up. 

“Frankie,” Benny speaks up for the group. “You have got to give her some slack, dude.” 

The glare Frankie sends the younger man’s way makes the rest of the guys glad Benny said it first. Benny—being Benny—doesn’t get the hint. 

“I mean, c’mon, she’s nineteen.” He tosses another handful of peanuts into his mouth, continuing his risky  and unwanted opinion with a mouth full of food. “And a grown adult.” 

For the sake of his good friend, Frankie pretends not to hear and goes back to scoping out his front lawn through the living room window. He peers out the temporary crack he’s made in the blinds for another couple of minutes, and then suddenly jumps away. 

“Little shit’s finally here,” Frankie grumbles as he walks past the group, glancing at his watch. “Minute and a half late.” He marches to the front door. 

Knowing that’s their queue to follow, the men eye each other before sliding off the barstools and gathering around their paranoid friend. It would be comical to see Frankie so worked up over this kid if he weren’t so serious about it. He’s absolutely convinced that there is no boy out there good enough for his little girl, and there is not a breathing soul on this earth that could change his mind. 

So they huddle up in their most intimidating stance, Santi to the left of Frankie, Benny to the right, and Will behind and between Frankie and Ben. If for no other reason than to make sure Frankie doesn’t give off “Little Man Syndrome” energy all by himself, they puff their chests, stand tall, and put on stern faces. 

The poor kid doesn’t even get to knock before Frankie pulls the door open. One glance at the guys, and he looks about ready to piss his pants—which really only proves Frankie’s point. 

“M-Mr. Morales?” The kid squeaks, doing his damndest to only focus on Frankie, and holds his hand out to shake. “I’m Tyler, here to pick your daughter up for—” he stutters when Frankie raises a brow— “for our date.” 

Frankie stares for a second, and the kid—Tyler—just about breaks down. 

“I-I mean, not our date, but y-your daughter’s. O-obviously. And mine—me and your daughter, our date.” 

Santi glances at Will, who is already side-eyeing Santi. That look conveys exactly what they’re both thinking: someone should really put this guy out of his misery. Luckily, Charlotte appears at the top of the stairs at that exact moment. 

“Oh my god, Dad!” She bursts out. “Stop making Tyler feel weird!” 

And it’s like a switch is flipped in Frankie. He turns around, smile bright on his face for his daughter. None of the guys are phased—this is how these things usually go. 

“Of course I’m not, sweetheart! Tyler and I actually just finished up a great conversation.” He turns back to the boy, still cheery. “Isn’t that right, sport?” 

Tyler, who looks like he should probably drink some water, quickly nods. “Yes, absolutely,” he agrees. 

Charlotte scoffs, not totally buying it, and quickly hurries the rest of the way downstairs. Before she reaches the torture circle at the front doorway, Frankie smiles one last time at Tyler. 

“Hurt her, and see what happens,” he says, just loudly enough for the kid to hear, and in a tone that would sound joking to anybody else. 

A hug for his daughter and a (possibly too aggressive) pat on the shoulder for Tyler later, the kids are headed down the driveway, one a tad more stiff than the other. 

“Be back by nine,” Frankie calls after them. 

Will glances at the clock and sighs. It’s 8:12pm. 

[ask-artsy-oncie]

Hearing "there's an active Talespin fan forum that someone got banned from for pointing out that it's a Jungle Book AU (and therefore shouldn't be considered 1:1 with the Jungle Book)" just gives me Klonoa fan forum flashbacks.

Very much over people who make geek culture their entire identities, but spend so much of their energy dictating how people should enjoy something rather than doing something productive and community driven.

[dont-offend-the-bees]

Fuck I hate being an adult. I need a more adult adult to help with the volatile emotional situation.

[todayisafridaynight]

reasons number A Million why not every rgg character needs to be +6ft he looks so fuckin stretched out. actually got put in the willy wonka taffy puller

[jrueships]

guess whos not going in at all this week, actually

[faaun]

the forest looks like heaven today i woke up feeling the heaviest weight at the top of my heart

[genesis-quoi]

nine after destroying the universe

[scienceisfood]

At the root of my problems.

[pepprs]

my depression is getting really really bad. like it’s been bad before but this is like… consistently really bad. like a long unending stretch for several weeks (and tbh months) now. to the point where no inoculation actually sticks (and im isolating myself from most of my inoculations anyway and feel unable to stop doing it even though i know it’s self destructive). im either helplessly unbearably miserable or numbing out on video games. i just don’t feel like it’s going to get better for me and i KNOW that is factually untrue but the feeling is louder than the knowledge and it’s just utterly immobilizing. ive been sinking in quicksand for 2 years.

[reverend-meat]

”oh no, I forgot my over the ear noise cancelling headphones for the grocery store!”

*pulls out a second, secret backup pair of noise cancelling grocery store headphones I keep in the car for just such an occasion.*

[fiendishartist2]

guys what if i want to make my own apollo justice game.

[snoring-dragon-productions]

Just spent some time crying while sitting on the bathroom floor and proceeded to stay there for Who Knows How Long with my eyes closed, not quite asleep but mentally checked out of Existing.

I’m winning at life lmao

[theflyingfeeling]

me in the Olli/Allu delelu land trying to explain how Olli acting weird and Aleksi suddenly smoking and them secretly glancing at each other must be all connected somehow

because they ARE!! 😭 we may be yet to connect the dots, but we're getting there okay, we're not crazy 😤

(don't forget the sunglasses!! I haven't figured out how but I just know they're somehow relevant in all this as well 😤 he just seems weirdly attached to them (and the bandana around his neck which he's been wearing in literally every picture we've seen of him for almost two weeks now?? not counting the pictures taken in the pool) like, did he pay and arm an a leg for them (I'm not sure if he's worn that exact pair before? I may be wrong though lol I often am with stuff like this) and justified the purchase to himself by swearing he'd wear them every chance he gets for the rest of the year lol