#Like Real People Do

[lifemod17]

He's singing this more gentle than usual. I need to go lie down. I am unwell 😭

Kia Forum night 1 || 09/17/2024

[cowboylikeyouu]

when hozier said "[insert his entire discography]", bitch i felt that

[kaidenchii]

Honey just put your sweet lips on my lips

We should just kiss like real people do

[poppy-in-the-woods]

Just leaving this here, because someone sent it to me and I have to save it somehow.

[black-brained]

GAHHHHHH RAHHHHHH ITS SO THEM I HATE IT

[hoziercriespower]

Hozier performing at Forest Hill in New York.

Hozier taking in the crowd while performing 'Like Real People Do.'

[hoziergifsdaily]

HOZIER — Like Real People Do | Barn on the Farm Sessions (2014) [part 1/2] requested by anonymous

[justgivemeabookplease]

I’m thinking about how Wasteland, Baby was a call to action and a tongue-and-cheek acceptance of the end of the world. And how Eat Your Young and Unreal Unearth are about the nine circles of Hell, about the afterlife, about the consequences after death. I’m thinking about one album cover being under water and another being buried under earth, about NFWMB “ain’t it like thunder under earth the sound it makes”, about Unreal Unearth and unearthing something, un-burial, about Like Real People Do “what did you bury before those hands pulled me from the earth.”

I’m thinking Eat Your Young, about Kronos’ mythology, about hunger for and to keep power, about gluttony. I’m thinking about Swan Upon Leda, about the lust Zeus had for Leda, about the greed of man over bodies, about who is the sinner. I’m thinking about angels, about their lack of power in Swan Upon Leda “could never belong to angels”, about their fall from grace in the “Unknown” song “I thought you were like an angel/going unknown as any angel/you called me angel.”

I’m thinking about Hozier.

[lisafrankenstan]

Hozier - Like Real People Do (2014)

X

Lisa Frankenstein (2024)

[fanficsbyme-causeimgay]

Imagine, if you will, you have been hiking. Regardless of your disability that gave you problems walking, hiking was an activity you loved doing.

Sadly, one day, that disability does not help.

You trip and fumble, rolling down a hill. Thankfully, you haven't broken anything, but you have lost your backpack that had the means to contact others to help you. Your phone broke, but even if it hadn't broken, you wouldn't have any signal.

Lying there in pain because of the many injuries you've sustained - as minor as they might be, they're still painful - you just see a shadow looming above you.

When you wake up next, you're in a cabin in the middle of the woods. The owner and sole person living in it is what can only be described as a lumberjack. Big man with thick arms and even thicker and strong voice that was a lot gentler than you'd expect from a man of his size. He helped you, he took you from where you were and brought you to his home - Here you have been for three days until now. He lives away from proper civilization, and although he has an emergency kit, he doesn't really use it, and some things have expired already. He can't exactly leave you here because it would take him days to get to the closest town, and you can't possible be by yourself for so long in the state you're in!

So he stayed.

As he lives alone and you're taking his only bed, he sleeps on the ground. At first, you felt really guilty about it - it is his house, so he should sleep on the bed! - but he keeps insisting that this wasn't the first time he slept on the ground and probably won't be the last. Still, you insist that at least you share, right? But it is awkward to share the bed with a stranger. So, why not become friends? That way the awkwardness will fade away... right?

You learn a few things about him. Very important things indeed.

He loves star fruits. His favorite color is green. He is an avid reader of what he explained to you to be scientific texts about soil and rocks (he went on and on about the differences between various types of rocks). He has taken to the art of woodcarving. And he also loves bears! He has made various small hand sized little bear statues that he has all around his house.

Talking about his house, although you have been mostly confined to the bedroom, you have seen a bit of it, mainly the kitchen. After a week of living together, you can finally move your body without too much pain or strain on your muscles, but walking still eludes you, cane or no cane. It is too painful. Maybe you tore something? Regardless, he sets you down on a chair he most likely makes himself and talks about whatever he wants as he makes dinner, and he is a good cook! He lives alone, so he has to be... Or make food good enough to eat.

He loves soups, too. "They're easy to make, hut hard to truly master." Is what he said when you asked about it... and it kinda makes sense.

One week turns into two, and you're starting to move around a little more, and that's when he takes you outside. It was cold, very cold, and that is when you find out he lives on top of a mountain. Without windows in his house ("I don't like them for... personal reasons."), you didn't really know you were higher up, but it was a beautiful, beautiful place... Miles and miles of forest as far as the eyes could see - and you could see your original trail too. It was two or so miles away and a steep drop down, too.

He sat you down by the porch and you two just watched the horizon as the sun set down before going back inside... it felt weirdly romantic.

Maybe that was when things started.

You began to help him with cooking - just small things. "Let me cut the potatoes for you." Oh yeah, he grew them and a bunch of other things too. He likes gardening, too... "Let me help you with that!" Or a good ol' "You look like you need some help."

And soft touches when reaching out for the same thing became more natural. Touches become more natural. Sleeping on the same bed becomes natural. Cuddling becomes more natural. And that was when you noticed it - He was gruff with it. He just told you: "I turn into a big bear sometimes." Like was the most common and perfectly normal thing for a big guy like him to do!

"Uhm, like, regularly?"

"Whenever I want to."

"...can I see that?"

And he shows you. He is big. He is brown. He is fluffy.

Secrelty, he is also extremely happy that you didn't freak out and tried to run away. He is even happier when you literally cuddle the fuck out od him.

But time, as always, moves on.

You were well enough to return to civilization. And he knew that, so he told you that the next morning, he would bring you to the nearest town. As a last farewell, he made a campfire, and you both sat together and watched as thunder rumbled above your heads. The dark clouds rolling in as rain would soon fall - and that is when he pulls out a simple guitar.

"...can I sing you something?" He asks, nervous. "I don't make any promises about the quality. It will probably suck."

"I would love to hear it." You say.

And he sings -

And when he finishes, you can't help it.

You don't wanna leave.

That night, you both did kiss, like real people do.

[darkpoetrynprose]

"But how could you live and have no story to tell?"

– Fyodor Dostoevsky, White Nights

[lifemod17]

SIR why are you making those faces during Like Real People Do?? RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY SALAD.

[eyndr-stories]

Last Line Challenge

Rules: in a new post, show the last line you wrote/drew and tag as many people as there were words (or however many you want to tag).

Hi @trees-can-draw!!! Thank you for the tag :] <3 I've been getting back into the Monty centered fic i started writing ages and ages ago dfhkjgfhjf (which is actually why i'm up at , 5am ,, ahem anyways)

"The repairs had gone well, and even with the social nightmare they'd agreed to looming on the horizon, Lark felt a sturdy sort of comfortable feeling deep in their gut that had settled in like a home cooked meal."

I do not know as many people as there are words for this fkjgfhkgf so instead i will shrimply tag @shirajellyfish, @victarin, and @lavenoon (very no pressure tags, feel free to ignore <3)

[loosethreadsofyoursoul]

like real people do — hozier

[hazbinwhoree]

reader that is related to one of adams band members. but has no interest in adam due to his reputation (at first) since she only bothers with long-term and committed stuff. tends to hide behind her sibling and snitch if adam ever tries to make a move. at some point its more to fuck with adam than actually avoid him, I assume it eventually works out, after more effort than expected from adam

My Bandmate’s Sister

A/N: The song is Like Real People Do by Hozier, my lord and savior.

Adam and his drummer, David, had beef. Was it because Adam constantly pursued David’s sister? Well that was David’s beef. Adam’s beef wasn’t exactly clear, but he had started pursuing David’s sister for the sole purpose of pissing David off.

(Name), David’s sister, came to all of their shows and had a free pass backstage due to being family. She had absolutely no interest in Adam. Every time Adam flirted with her, she would tell her brother and hide behind him, smirking as he and Adam got into a fight.

But Adam was nothing if not persistent.

His reputation was working against him, his fuckboy persona not benefitting him for the first time in his life. (Name) was a conservative girl, only interested in the long term and unconcerned with hookups and all things shallow. And in her mind, Adam was a shallow as they came.

“There are 206 bones in my body. Want to help me grow another one?”

Unimpressed, (Name) turned to face him. “I’m shocked you know how many bones you have in your body. I figured you were too stupid to know a fact like that.”

Adam placed a hand over his heart in mock hurt. “Babe, you wound me.”

“Leave me alone or I’ll tell David you’re trying to fuck me again.”

Adam pushed a little more, and true to her word, (Name) spun on her heel and marched over to the drummer, tapping his shoulder. She whispered in his ear and David looked over at Adam, pissed.

He stood up and just like that, he and Adam were in another fight.

See, maybe Adam would have given up by now. It was funny the first few times, but the constant fights with David were getting old. The problem was, Adam had legitimately started catching feelings for (Name). He supposed he’d just have to try harder.

Maybe heavy flirting wasn’t the way to go.

Instead of heavy flirting, Adam started asking her questions about herself instead. (Name) seemed skeptical and sometimes she’d tell on him to David just to fuck with Adam, but it was working much better than the heavy flirting was.

(Name) actually enjoyed having normal conversation with Adam. Once you got past his flirting and ego, he was actually a good conversationalist. (Name) came to learn more about him too. He only takes his mask off to sleep. He can’t cook. Doesn’t have any STDs (surprise), how that conversation even came to be, (Name) didn’t know.

It was kind of nice, but Adam could tell her guard was still up. He started ignoring his groupies in lieu of talking to (Name) after every show, much to David’s chagrin. If David had it his way, Adam wouldn’t interact with (Name) period, but she was more than capable of making her own decisions and if she wanted to talk to Adam, he couldn’t stop her.

(Name) felt slightly special that Adam blew off easy lays just to pursue her. Still, she was sure it was an act to get into her pants, so she was cautious.

Adam started dedicating sets to her at shows, and David hated it. (Name) found it kind of sweet that he was pubic about liking her. He was getting in his own way when it came to getting laid and he didn’t even care.

One night, after a show, (Name) was talking to her brother when Adam approached her. “Hey babe, can I steal you?” David scowled. “No–” (Name) silenced him with a hand on his shoulder. “Sure,” she agreed.

Adam grinned and led her away while David glared after them. He led her outside the venue before abruptly picking her up bridal-style and taking flight. (Name) shrieked. “I can fly by myself, asshole!” Adam just laughed at her.

They weren’t in the air for too long before Adam reached their destination. It was an open field, a beautiful clearing, where the stars and moon shone brightly. Adam carefully set her down on her feet before pulling his guitar off his back.

“I learned a new song, I want to play it for you.”

“Did we have to come all the way out here?”

“I needed to set the mood,” Adam rolled his eyes. “Just listen.”

He began to strum his guitar.

“I had a thought, dear, however scary

About that night, the bugs and the dirt

Why were you digging? What did you bury

Before those hands pulled me from the earth

I will not ask you where you came from

I will not ask and neither should you

Honey, just put your sweet lips on my lips

We should just kiss like real people do.”

(Name) was silent. Adam had such a nice voice. She’d never been serenaded by a guy before.

“I knew that look, dear, eyes always seeking

Was there in someone that dug long ago

So I will not ask you why you were creeping

In some sad way, I already know

So I will not ask you where you came from

I would not ask and neither would you

Honey, just put your sweet lips on my lips

We should just kiss like real people do.”

(Name) couldn’t believe a metalhead like Adam had learned a love song just for her.

“I could not ask you where you came from

I could not ask and neither could you

Honey, just put your sweet lips on my lips

We could just kiss like real people do.”

(Name) was quiet when Adam finished the song, and her heart fluttered when she noticed how nervous he looked. “Did I get the message across?” he asked.

“That you want to fuck me? You’ve made that very clear.”

“No,” Adam said exasperated. “That I like you.”

“Oh.” (Name) was quiet. He seemed so genuine she found herself believing him. It scared her.

“Oh?” Adam repeated. “Is that all you have to say?” (Name) shook her head. “I’m just… processing.” “I thought I’ve been making it pretty clear,” Adam said.

“Well sure, but you’re a fuckboy,” (Name) retorted.

Fair enough.

“Which is why I did all this. I wanted to ask you something and make it special.”

“Ask me what?”

Adam put his guitar back on his back, reaching his hands out for (Name) to take. Cautiously, she did.

“To be my girl.” “What?” “I’m asking you to be my girlfriend,” Adam said, tone devoid of all humor. “Are you serious?” Adam nodded. “Dead serious.”

Now (Name) looked unsure. “What is it?” Adam asked. “Anything you’re worried about, any questions you have, I’ll answer. Put your mind at ease.”

“I’m just having trouble believing the great Adam wants a serious relationship.”

“You’re forgetting I’ve been married twice. And I really loved Lilith and Eve. They left me, not the other way around. Fuck, Eve cheated on me. So I know that pain and I’d never be unfaithful. I know I’m kind of a man whore but who cares what I do when I’m single? I’m a man who can commit. To the right woman.”

(Name) had to admit he plead his case well. She couldn’t deny her own feelings for him any longer, not with that reassurance.

“...Okay.” “Okay?” “I’ll be your girlfriend.” “Really?” Adam almost looked like he didn’t believe her.

(Name) smiled. “The song kinda sold it. Did you really learn it just for me?” Adam blushed. “Yeah, I know you like Hozier and I figured that was the most applicable song so…”

(Name) took her hands in his. “That was sweet.”

They stared at one another, faces illuminated by moonlight, before Adam bent down and carefully connected their lips. He’d waited for this for so long.

The stars twinkle above they as they kiss like real people do.

[sunlight-fics]

Sick day.

•Andrew Hozier X reader

-Warnings: fluff, taking care of Andrew, convincing himself he’s not sick.

ENJOY!!!

———————————————————————

It was a stormy Monday morning, you woke up to your fiancés head laying on your chest. Which is something he almost never does unless he has had a rough day or if he’s sick. His eyes were open and he was looking out the slightly opened blinds of the window. You start running your fingers through his hair and he turned his attention towards you. “Good morning darling.” You said softly. “Mh….” He slightly groaned and laid his head back down. “Are you ok?” You asked softly. “Yea…. I’m fine.” He gets up and sits on the bed, he softly groans and the flops back down on the bed. “Hon, I think your sick. Just stay in bed, I’ll take care of you today.” He sits back up and puts his head in his hands. “No…. I really gotta finish up writing for the new album.” You get up and sit next to him. You gently rub his back and kiss his forehead. “One simple day of rest won’t kill you, darling. Just please rest.” He sighs and stands up “No, babe. I promise I’m not sick.” He starts to walk out the bedroom, you get up and follow him down the hallway and downstairs to the kitchen. The entire way you tried to persuade him to stay home and rest. “Will you just at least let me check your temperature?” You begged. He finally turned around and sighed, “Sure fine.” You then reached up and gently touched his forehead with the back of your hand. “Honey, you’re burning up. Please go back to bed and I’ll make some tea.” He softly smiles and sighs “fine. I’ll go.” He said while also walking back to the bedroom. You started making tea and called into work saying you “sick” and taking the day off, which wasn’t true but luckily they bought it. A couple minutes passed and the tea was done steeping. You pour it into a mug and walk to the bedroom, you walked in to find Andrew sleeping with three blankets piled on him. You smile and say the tea down on his nightstand, walked over to your side of the bed. You laid down next and gently kissed his forehead.

You soft hummed and ran your fingers through his hair. You most literally admired him as he laid there, sleeping peacefully. “I love you, Andy.” You whispered gently.

Notes: Tysm for reading!!! Ik this one is short again, I just got really busy and kind of forgot about it. Also I couldn’t think of a song to go with this Fic so Like Real People Do is what y’all get.