#Merlin’s banished

[ink-through-her-veins]

One day Merlin uses his magic to save a child. It’s impossible to hide it. Arthur is right there. Merlin’s shocked that Arthur isn’t. He’s wrecked and sad like the world has split apart or the ground crumbled beneath him.

“Arthur-“

“Don’t.”

They return to Camelot in silence. Arthur’s face is unreadable. Merlin’s heart breaks with every kilometer they travel. They arrive in Camelot at dusk.

“Arthur?”

“Say your goodbyes and leave.”

It’s better than Merlin could have hoped for, but he had hoped. He’d hoped that Arthur would understand. He’d hoped that Arthur would forgive him. He’d hoped Arthur had known him. He’d hoped for a chance to explain. He’d only wanted all the parts of him to be known—to be accepted.

Merlin’s goodbyes are tear-filled. They are heart wrenching, but the goodbye he doesn’t get to say hurts the worst.

A horse awaits him in the courtyard. Arthur’s doing undoubtedly. A little bit of Merlin clings to hope even as he lifts himself into the saddle.

Arthur thinks he’s hidden well enough in the shadows to not be spotted. He isn’t. Merlin sees him and their eyes hold each other’s until the silence feels like a knife twisting in their chests.

“It doesn’t end like this,” Merlin tells him. “We don’t end like this.”

Arthur doesn’t argue, but deep down he knows that Merlin’s right.

[atdawn]

MERLIN | 4.09 Lancelot du Lac

[leondegranced]

My piece for DarKymi for the Merthur Glompfest 2023!

[dead-inside-pt2]

*Merlin gets banished from Camelot for being a funky little magician*

Arthur: Go, If you ever return it would be on the pain of death

Merlin: Okay *Exits the gates* Merlin: *Immediately turns back around and runs into Camelot again*

Arthur, who would never allow his death: You are the stupidest person in all the five kingdoms

[springs-hurts]

Lmao but imagine if Gwaine was son of a known Lord/knight or Lady/princess, or known to pendragons atleast.

So he comes to Camelot with merlin and Arthur, Uther sees him and goes "so, how's your mother boy, there was a time we'd meet almost daily, if things hadn't gone wrong, You and Arthur would have been as good as brothers" Uther thinking wistfully.

Meanwhile, Arthur and Gwaine shocked 😐😐

Lmao😭😂

[fluffypotatey]

*smashes in like the Kool-Aid man*

PENDRAGON SIBLINGS YOU SAY????

I have. So many Feels. About Themst™

The complexity?? The layers?? The angst?? Hello??????

Their relationship is just So Much, because you are right, it's all tangled up in miscommunication and missed opportunities, and so many problems that can be sourced back to Uther "War Crimes" Pendragon, who wouldn't know a healthy relationship if it bit him on the ass.

If Merlin and Arthur are two sides of the same coin, then Arthur and Morgana are edges of the same blade.

Because it's the lonely childhoods, the shared grief, the friendship, the vulnerability, the fondness, the teasing, the envy, the jealousy, the almost romance, the protectiveness, the betrayal, the loss, the hurt, the refusal to let go and the desperate hanging on, and the love, the love, the love.

Indifference is the true opposite of love.

Hate is love that's gone rotten.

“If Merlin and Arthur are two sides of the same coin, then Arthur and Morgana are edges of the same blade.” oh fuck….

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FUCK

WAIT HOLD ON WAIT LEMME PIGGYBACK ON THAT BESTIE @0hheytherebigbadwolf (tagging you bc it will be a couple days after you sent this ask)

(Also, for anyone wanting background context on what me and bestie are bouncing off on: voilà)

OK OK SO

we are all familiar with King Uther being the greatest (worst) dad of all time, correct? places such high expectations on his “only son and heir” whilst never officially acknowledging Morgana as his daughter until the very end?

F+ father of the year :)

he is not above sending his children into the dungeon if they disobey him as seen here:

(Jfc he even put Morgana in chains like wtf)

also, he is not above using emotional guilt towards them when he deems it necessary (aka one of the only times he actually acknowledges them as his children)

UTHER (1x02 Valiant) I trust you will make me proud.

UTHER (1x08 The Beginning of the End) I’ve treated you like a daughter. Is this how you repay me?

UTHER (1x12 To Kill the King) You are the daughter I never had.

UTHER (2x08 Sins of the Father) You would believe a sorcerer’s lies over the word of your father?

not to mention that when Arthur or Morgana try to reason with him or argue with him since they are the only ones with the status to do so, he pulls rank

UTHER (1x12 To Kill the King) May I remind you that you are speaking to your King [...] Take care, child, or I’ll have you restrained.

UTHER (2x08 Sins of the Father) I am your king and your father. You will show me some respect!

UTHER (2x06 Beauty and the Beast) We live in dangerous times, I cannot allow you to undermine my authority.

UTHER (3x10 Queen of Hearts) You have caused this to happen, Arthur. My decision is final.

ngl i could include more but i have already spent hours searching for shit (YOUTUBE WILL DIE BY MY HAND THAT STINGY BITC—) but y’all get what i mean: Uther is an abusive fucker and it has messed up the conditions of Arthur and Morgana

now, about the double edged blade…..

as previously established, Uther is a fucking dick and wants his children to obey him but also adore him. with this behavior, the Pendragon siblings react in two ways: with anger & contempt or submission and remorse

way #1

i’m gonna start with Morgana because anger is the easiest to pick out throughout the show. in the first episode of the first season, our introduction to Morgana’s character is her lecturing Uther about executing the man Merlin witnessed upon entering Camelot (such a warm welcome for Emrys, mh?)

MORGANA I just don't think chopping someone's head off is cause for a celebration. That poor mother. UTHER It was simple justice for what he'd done. MORGANA To whom? He practiced some magic, he didn't hurt anyone. UTHER You were not around twenty years ago, you have no idea what it was like. MORGANA How long are you going to keep punishing people for what happened then?

early on, it is easy to pick up on Morgana’s resentment and anger at Uther, who she believes is blinded by his fear of magic and his need for control (which she isn’t wrong about). also, we find that she isn’t one to back off when poking the bear (Uther). she does it constantly in seasons 1 & 2

MORGANA (1x03 Mark of Nimueh) Why would she kneel on a cold stone floor morning after morning when she could make these things happen with a snap of her fingers? Like an idle king!

MORGANA (1x08 The Beginning of the End) How can this child be your enemy? He's just a boy. UTHER He is a Druid. MORGANA Is that such a crime?…What have these people done to you? Why are you so full of hate?

UTHER (2x04 Lancelot and Guinevere) How many men would you have me sacrifice to save a servant? MORGANA  As many as it takes!

to be honest, i wouldn’t be surprised if screaming, arguing and berating Uther about his morals and ethics is her way of proving that she is not weak or submissive to his actions. i mean, Morgana grew up in a household the complete opposite from her time in Camelot. Gorlois, the man whom Morgana considers to be her father and one and only family member, was said to be “just” and “kind” and someone that Uther even considered a good friend who openly kept him in check. Morgana, until the age of ten, understood parental love and empathy unlike Arthur, who spent his whole life without any good or healthy substance of it.

the culture of Camelot and Uther’s wrath is not something Morgana was ever able to fully acclimate to as Uther himself pointed out in 1x12. She “was at odds with [him] since the beginning” and could never picture herself as a Pendragon (point further proven in 4x05: she looked revolted when Queen Annis compared her to Uther) because she didn’t share in their idea of magic = evil and a king = absolute control.

ironic in terms of future plot events, isn’t it :’)

way #2

compare that to Arthur: man’s respressed af. keeps all his emotions under lock and key if they are anything but haughty and serious. y’all, Arthur even says it himself how he “[can't] disagree with Father [Uther] in public.” whenever Arthur finds himself at odds with Uther, he holds his tongue and waits until he can disobey secretly (2x05 when he leaves to rescue Gwen, 1x08 when he helps Morgana sneak out Mordred in the dark of the night, 2x08 when he sneaks out to meet Morgause for more info about his mom, etc). it is only the rare moments when Arthur feels impassioned enough to speak up without fearing any retribution does Arthur talk back at him (so satisfying 👌)

ARTHUR (1x03 Mark of Nimueh) [Morgana’s] right, Father. You hear the word magic, you no longer listen.

ARTHUR (2x08 Sins of the Father) This is what fuels your hatred for those who practice magic. Rather than blame yourself for what you did, you blame them….You hunted her kind like animals! How many hundreds have you condemned to death to ease your guilt?!….You speak of honour and nobility! You're nothing but a hypocrite and a liar!

ARTHUR (3x10 Queen of Hearts) You can't forbid my feelings any more than I can. I won't deny them any longer, I love her. I love Guinevere.

we can even compare how the two react to Uther’s violence towards them

(ahahahahahaaaaa what a wonderful dad)

on the left, you see Arthur’s face right when Uther crushes the morteus flower needed to heal Merlin (his manservant/friend/????) and on the right, is Morgana after Uther discovers she was harboring a Druid child in her chambers and she refuses to listen to his reason.

notice how both faces are remarkably similar 👀

however, Arthur’s look of shock and dismay come from his hope that Uther would do the right thing. that he would help save Merlin’s life from dying of poison. that he wouldn’t use this as a method to teach Arthur “what it means to disobey and cross the king.” he truly did hope, just like he always does with the people he holds close. Arthur cannot help but hope and trust that those close to him will not betray him and yet so many do. hence the remorse

looking at Morgana, her shock comes from the fact that this might be the first time Uther reacted to her words and actions in a physical manner. my suspicion is that most of the time, all Morgana previously got was Uther reprimanding her and yelling at her to stop questioning his methods (bc, let’s be real, she was the favorite child.) never has he lifted a finder on her like Arthur and i have proof (cue transcript!)

AND! and, Arthur is constantly warning Morgana about not angering Uther any further because of the consequences she might face (consequences this boy is very familiar with) when Uther deems it necessary to “teach” his children obedience.

UTHER (1x04 The Poisoned Chalice) You have to learn there's a right and a wrong way of doing things. I'll see you're let out in a week. Then you can find yourself another servant.

UTHER (3x10 Queen of Hearts) You have caused this to happen, Arthur. My decision is final [...] This is for your own good. - UTHER She will die. The enchantment will be broken. You'll see I was right.

UTHER (2x08 Sins of the Father) I am protecting you from your own foolishness!

so educational 🥰 but see, because Uther presents his punishments as lessons, Arthur himself views them as just a fucked up but meaningful way of his father’s concern because “yeah, I am the first born son and only heir to the throne. of course I need to learn not to do silly things like disobey, talk back to him, be my own person.” <- I’m paraphrasing here

Arthur does and has never seen a way out of the life thrust upon him by Uther (see 3x06). succeeding Uther as king, marrying a noblewoman of high standing for heirs and alliance strength was always expected of him. Arthur never saw a way out of this. even when he and Gwen were in their secret relationship phase, Arthur had to remind himself that this would never last. he loved her and knew she loved him, but there was always that reminder (that sounded a lot like Uther) in the back of his head telling him that it would never last so long as he was prince. he had a duty (constructed by Uther) to serve Camelot and going against his father would mean (in his eyes) that he is going against Camelot (as Uther always presented it to be).

so unlike Morgana, he did not kick and scream but stood firm because that was what he believed was stronger. if he stayed in his lane and did his part, then he would be a good king, maybe even a better one than his father, for Camelot. however, the show proves that differentiating himself from Uther actually made him the better king and more respected, but this is not the meta for that. I am getting side tracked.

OK: so we’ve established parental issues between the two siblings. now onto their very complex, complicated yet beloved dynamic

sO, as i mentioned in this post (because i am lazy and too tired to copy/paste the evidence from there), these siblings do care for one another. they just go about it in the most hilarious and repressed and in-denial way (hilarious to me 😤)

when we meet them, it’s established that these two have known each other for some time. enough for them to bicker and have banter, you know, as you do with a Pendragon. also, should add, neither character are ever aware they are blood-related until s3 (because of some weak-ass bitch named Uther), so you have that very, uh, interesting subplot in s1 that everybody forgets about until you rewatch it. (honestly, I have so many questions. number 1: why???? number 2: it’s only in s1—was it scrapped??? is it like it never existed???? what was its purpose to the plot??? bbc explain yourself—)

however, despite how much it is shown that they do care for one another, they’re relationship in s1 is still undefined and vague as if they also don’t know how to accurately define what the other means to them. it’s very similar to the whole “i really love this person so much but is what i’m feeling platonic, familial, or romantic?” because….you know, guy and girl besties who are close are typically expected to grow romantic feelings for each other, so tbh i would not be surprised if both mistook their love as romantically inclined in the beginning bc, reminder, neither of them were aware they were siblings until much later.

[and this is ALL i am saying on this subplot. i do not want to cause any negative discourse, so if anyone has a few choice words about it, either keep it to yourself or feel free to talk about it with people you know. personally? not a fan of the ship and never will be, but i am not here to post about that.]

anyway, have some featured receipts showing Arthur and Morgana slipping up and showing how much they care for each other.

SEE!!!! LOOK AT HOW THE CARE!!!! SEE HOW THEY WORRY FOR THE OTHER AND WISH TO PROTECT THEM FROM HARM!!! (and see how even when they’re on opposite sides there is still that same love. just more warped and corrupted T^T)

^worried/protective Morgana

^Arthur’s face after Merlin informs him that there’s an intruder heading to Morgana’s chambers

Morgana is very aware of Arthur’s trusting nature. Arthur is very aware of Morgana’s empathy and righteous nature. they understand each other so well which is why Morgana knew just how to harm Arthur in later seasons and why Morgana’s betrayal hit Arthur so hard. it’s also why he never stopped trying to reach out to her in s4 & s5. as @merlinemrys said in this lovely post, the show’s driving force is love. love of all kinds. whatever conflict it is, love is there at the center of it all and, in Arthur and Morgana’s case, it does not save them (just like how love does not save Merlin or Arthur from what lies ahead, as the op of the post pointed out).

that is what makes their relationship/love be like a double edged sword!! that is why they are edges of the same blade!!! they protect and fight for what they believe in and for the people they love, but the same blades cut deep and twist their wounds into a lasting scar.

it is because of Arthur’s love for Morgana that he cannot help but hope and mourn the woman he once knew. it is because of Morgana’s love for Arthur that her feelings of hatred are so strong and ugly.

like honestly,

look at them T^T compared to before

their relationship is so tragic T^T because we knew them before it all went wrong. we knew they cared and understood each other. we knew that for some time, they only had each other to rely on for a friend, a crutch, a breather for when the royal life was too much. both of them were fighters and strive to honor their values. both of them had once leaned on the other for support, had wanted nothing but happiness for each other.

fuck, they didn’t even get the chance to really be siblings because they found out too late, and by then Morgana was on a war path and Arthur only found out at the last minute.

like fuck, man

two sides of the same blade: forged with love, yet used for blood

screencaps brought to you by me, @sourdough-morbread, and farfarawaysite

[queen-of-obsessing]

the people have spoken (@merlinjoyer @astudyintheburningofhearts)! here's my take on the magic reveal scene thingy that i mentioned here

---

The air was tense in the throne room as the remaining council members and onlookers filed out of the room; Gwaine casting another worried glance in Merlin’s direction, who was still knelt to the floor. Arthur stood at his throne, leaning against it in silence, a deep frown creasing his forehead, remaining even after the birch doors slammed shut, deepening the silence. He slowly turned, stalking across the room. “What are you still doing on your knees; am I just your king?” Merlin looked away from his dark stare. “Get up, for goodness’ sake.”

Merlin reluctantly stood, his whole body feeling like an undertow dragging him deeper into the murky depths of the guilt and shame he had been trying so hard to avoid. This day was never supposed to come. Arthur returned to the front of his throne, and for the first time since before the battle, they were face to face. Merlin bravely met his eyes, mired with a disappointment that made him want to curl into a ball and die. The silence was endless, neither of them knowing what to say to the other.

“How long?” Arthur’s voice was leveled; low and controlled.

Merlin’s heart pounded in his chest. “I was born with it.”

He watched as Arthur took in this information. “You’ve lied to me all this time.” Frustration threaded through his voice, a restrained anger boiling under the surface. “Why?”

“Arthur, I wanted to tell you -” Merlin insisted.

“All those times you said you respected me and trusted me, was that all a lie too?”

“No!” he cried, tears spilling down his cheeks. “I meant every word.”

“Did you want to overthrow me, like Morgana? Like Morgause? Is that what you want? Power?”   

“No!” Merlin cried in disbelief. “I never wanted any of that!”

“Then forgive me, because I must really stupid!” Arthur exploded, lunging forward to grab Merlin by the shoulders. “WHAT WERE YOU DOING?”

“I did it for you!” Merlin tearfully yelled. “To protect you! Because I care for you, and love you, and believe in you!” Arthur softened his grip on his arms, eyes widening as he spoke. “But forgive me, for not baring my soul to you in a kingdom where my mere existence could have me burned alive! I was scared!”

Arthur backed away, horror clouding his gaze. “Of me?” His friend went silent, swallowing back fresh tears, and his silence was all the answer he needed. “All these years and you never understood,” Arthur said quietly, his anger now shrouded in sadness. “I stuck my neck out for you, I broke you out of jail, I helped Mordred, a known druid, escape execution, hell, I even made him a knight! I executed Kara because she tried to murder me, not for her magic! Did you pay any notice?” Merlin looked away in shame. “I am not my father, but you should’ve known that.” He hesitated. “I thought we were friends.”

Merlin lifted his head. “We are friends.”

Arthur shook his head. “No,” he said softly. “A friend would have had faith in me.” He straightened, a steeled resolve passing over his face. “I don’t want to see you dead, Merlin,” he said. “But I don’t want to see you. I cannot look on you every day. You will leave Camelot at first light.”

Merlin’s eyes widened. “Arthur – no!” he protested, as his king signalling for the guards. “You can’t do this!”

“I am sorry,” Arthur said, as they grasped him by the arms, escorting him out of the room.

[rendnotmyheart]

LANCELOT??????? What? WHy??? I did not remember this😭😭😭

[merlinfic]

hi! your page is absolutely incredible, thank you so much for making it exist! i hope you’re having a lovely summer!

i was just wondering if you know of any fics where arthur is grieving merlin in some way, be it after sending him away after a magic reveal or merlin’s death with a happy ending? i recently read “only a dream of the grass blowing” who i can’t remember was the brilliant author, and “the second time around” written by prattery, and they were exactly what i was looking for! if you know of any fics like that, that’d be incredible!

thank you so much again, y’all are amazing <3

Hi anon! You’ll want the banished!Merlin, Merlin leaves, and the presumed dead tags! Here’s a few more:

all our dead, unfinished selves

Fate Itself Unravelled 

tomorrow is uncertain

For those interested: Only A Dream Of The Grass Blowing & The Second Time Around 

[ink-through-her-veins]

Arthur regretted the day he didn’t execute Will.

Merlin had looked up at him with those big blue eyes and that adorable pout and he’d gone against everything he’d been taught and let a sorcerer live. Now, he was reaping his just punishment for his stupidity.

Arthur glared at the crude drawing of what he assumed was himself. Merlin snorted behind him. Arthur turned, the same withering hateful glare on his face. Merlin tried and failed to suppress his grin.

“I think Will draws the posters himself.”

The wobbly handwriting looked more like chicken scratch than words but the message was surprisingly legible:

‘hERE thE faNtastic tails of pRiNcE aRthuR, the pRat.’

Arthur could believe that Will drew the crude likeness of him. The crown upon the figure’s head tilted to one side. In the middle of the face a hooked nose took up more space than any human nose possibly could. It looked nothing like him, except for the eyes. Will had used some sort of rudimentary blue pigment to make the eyes a startling shade of blue.

“He knows he’s not allowed in Camelot?”

Merlin nodded and bit his lip. If he let out even a single giggle, Arthur was placing him in the stocks.

“And that I could have him executed?”

“He knows you’d never do that.”

Suddenly everything became clear.

“How’d he hear these fantastic tales, Merlin?”

Merlin looked away. Arthur ripped the poster down before turning on Merlin. He thrusted the parchment into Merlin’s face.

“What did you tell him?”

“Nothing!” Merlin backed away from Arthur. “He must be spreading lies and rumors.”

The door to the tavern opened and from inside Arthur could hear a noise like a dying cat. Raucous laughter followed and then a few strums of a lute before Will began singing again.

“Arthur ate a rat… though when it ran across his floor he was a scaredy-cat,” Will sang pitifully.

Arthur glared at Merlin. The parchment crinkled as his hand balled into a fist.

“I’m having him burned at the pyre.”

[chaos-has-theories]

Yesterday my roommate said that Arthur talks like he's constantly picking the wrong option in a dating sim

and I don't think I'll ever stop thinking about that

[aus-nobody-asked-for]

In a land of myth, and a time of magic… the destiny of a great kingdom rests on the shoulders of a young boy. His name… Merlin.

When Merlin opened his eyes, his first instinct was to growl. It was the 311. day of the banishment of Arthur Pendragon. The 311. day in the reign of a troll. And and even longer since Uther Pendragon first stated he was madly in love with said troll.

And as fun as it was to think about Uther sharing his bed with a troll, Camelot was going downhill.

[castelled-away]

The scene in „The Hunter’s Heart“ where Arthur unknowingly hunts Gwen (while she’s a deer) gives me Disney’s Swan Lake-vibes bc the prince (Derek) also hunts Odette in her swan-form while also not knowing that it is her

[immortal-clotpole]

“Merlin" Arthur breathes out as his former servant sits down on the throne that used to be his.

“Arthur" Merlin mutters, looking at the former king, now kneeling in front of him. Arthur's hands are held behind his back by manacles but no one really thinks the misty eyes are at fault for that.

“I don't know what to say....“

“Neither do we" Gwaine walks up right next to Merlin. "You should have him thrown in dungeons“ He looks at the one he used to fight for with face full of disgust.

“Thought you were a loyal knight." Arthur let's out a humourless chuckle.

“I always told you." Gwaine raises his voice. "I was loyal to you because I'm loyal to Merlin."

"Gwaine, enough." Merlin turns to him and the crown on his head almost slides down to the side.

“Of course, My king.“ Gwaine's eyes get that mischievous spark again as he walks back to stand next to Leon.

"So, what will you do with me?" Arthur looks up to the blue eyes that never were nothing else than soft and caring ever before. Now there's hardly any trail of the man he knew in the person sitting in front of him. It's his fault. Arthur knows. “Will you have me executed?"

"I've told you when you find out about my magic." Merlin scoffs. “I would never hurt you, Arthur. As much as you might deserve it"

A small shard of the Merlin he knew before shines for a good second before Arthur's eyes.

Maybe Arthur can fix this. Maybe he can have Merlin next to him again. Maybe they-

Not the knights and definitely not Gwaine nor Lancelot will ever forgive him.

But, most importantly, Arthur can't let Merlin to forgive him. He can't. He can't. He can't...

[dracolunae]

I have made a tentative alliance with the cats at my aunt’s birthday party. We are the stairwell dwellers

[lonesomedotmp3]

gwen is finally queen! all it took was the total annihilation of her entire character and also the unjust unrestored destruction of her reputation within the story! slay I fucking guess!