#WHAT IS THIS SHIT. WHO THOUGHT IT WAS A GOOD IDEA

[leilohsstupidgaystuff]

You know what I would have loved in Days of Future Past? Hank snapping and yelling at Erik, about what Charles went through in the past 10 years.

Erik: You sacrificed your powers so you could walk?

Hank *putting on autopilot and storming out of the cockpit* You fucking asshole! So what if he did? What do you care? Shouldn't you be glad? Aren't you happy you don't have to put on your stupid helmet again? Shutting him out again? Breaking his heart even more? You made him already feel guilty about having his powers, do you really have to make him feel guilty about not having them? You have no right to talk about his legs like that. You shot him and then pulled out the bullet, I mean how little common sense do you have, to do such shit?

Charles: Hank, it's alright...

Hank: No. Nothing is alright. Don't you dare say that anything is alright, not after the last fucking ten years. *turning to Erik again* Do you have any idea of what you did? Not only put you on that stupid helmet and killed Shawn, which Charles felt by the way. -Oh you didn't know? Strange, and I thought you two were so damm good in talking about your feelings- Not only did you shot a bullet exactly at his spine and pulled it out again. No you had to take Raven with you. His only family left. The only nice person there was, in his fucked up childhood. You took her with you and left him alone, in pain and with the feeling that his powers were something wrong, the only mutation you shouln't be proud of. So yeah, excuse him for not only taking the opportunity of being able to walk again, but to shut his so damm hated power down. And don't even get me started on your fucked up relationship. Do you honestly think, we belived that you two were just really great friends? What do you think happens, when you break the heart someone, who loved you so deeply, in such a cruel way? Not just someone, but a telepath, with a range of emotions we can't even grasp to understand. That they stay as cold as you? That they just keep going?So again; excuse him, excuse him for having emotions, for falling into a depression and for getting addicted to drugs and alcohol. Now would you do us all the favour of having a little bit of emotional intelligence or shutting the fuck up, asshole?

Logan: *grinning* I just rememberd why I like you.

[bigfatbimbo]

Hey there! @hazbinhotelmollykisser here yet again, with the promised bill rambles :)

Forgive me if the following words sound like nonsense, I'm trying lol

SO. I'll be covering the bill with a more powerful reader and sub bill because your works have changed my brain chemistry, masochist bill because I'M GOING INSANE AN I NEED TO BE SEDATED, and bill with a reader that likes to tease him (with a more powerful reader version and a just a human version) because I need to study his reactions to teasing like I'm Stanford studying like... Science + math = triangles or something.

・Bill x More powerful reader

So I actually made an entire oc for this literally as soon as I finished reading the og post, which I will refrain on ranting abt, but the idea of a reader that's more powerful than bill is fascinating to me.

Because like, he's bill so he's obviously gonna try to get under your skin, but imagine a reader that sees his attempts to annoy them and just... Like laughs? A reader that finds his attempts almost endearing? Reverting whatever bill did back to before with just a snap and maybe a passing comment about his mischief.

It would drive him mad I think, he'd be rlly annoyed and pissy about it.

Or alternatively, a reader that does get angry when he tries to annoy them, (a loud and aggressive angry or a quiet festering angry both yielding different reactions from bill) and Bill takes it as motivation to keep annoying you (and it's definitely only because he thinks it's funny and totally definitely no other reason).

(Holy shit this is already getting long)

・Sub!Bill

So obviously a brat right? Like very obviously? We all agree on that.

And this next bit will probably just be regurgitating your points because I can't stop having the same opinions as you,

I personally need to see any + every version of bill cipher getting taken down a peg. Like I need to just. Ruin his life a little. Like I need to cause him mental peril and make it up to him (but actually it's only for me) by making him beg for what he wants and not giving him anything unless he asks out loud because "well I'm not a mind reader" (more powerful reader probably IS but shhhh..)

I want him to cry and beg (as do most people who read your blog honestly)

・masochist bill

Thinking about the way that bill literally talks about going out of his way to inflict pain onto the bodies he "possesses" (? Idk if that's the word I should use) made me think. Like too much thinking too many thoughts, to the point that I at multiple points almost wrote a small drabble in my notes app about it. (I would've if I could think of any words to write down when I need them 😭)

But like he's definitely some kind masochist right?

I can't think of any scenarios for human reader he made a deal with and bill for this category but imagine with me pls, a HUMAN reader, that he made a deal with (is actively trying to manipulate), causing him PAIN somehow (directly or indirectly), and he... DOSENT MIND? because 1. He's gonna have a mental breakdown because of it probably, and 2. He dosent JUST not mind. It's like EXCITING but not normal exciting.

So basically he'd be freaking out.

And with a reader that's more powerful than him? I think it'd be clear as day. Going hand in hand with the angry reader that's more powerful than him thing above, he would absolutely get off on annoying them until they snap at him (specifically the snap at him part). And when reader notices, they're obviously gonna make fun of him because hes being pathetic lol.

I think I have run out of masochist bill words now so onto the next topic.

・tease reader (human) x bill

My main reason for bringing this up is I love the idea of the powerful bill cipher being.. Well, flustered.

Like maybe when it's triangle form bill its easier to hide for him but if it were human bill reader would be able to tell almost instantly probably.

And more opportunities to make fun of bill for being a pathetic little creature are always good :)

・tease reader (more powerful) x bill

OOWOWHEOEJEIEBSJBSISNDH I love this idea so so SO SO SOSOSOSO MUCH!!!3&:28&:9.

SO MANY MORE OPPORTUNITIES TO TEASE AND NOT GET KILLED :)

Like imagine with me, your teasing bill and he gets all "upset" and probably threatens you, you don't gotta back off, you infact can tease him even more for thinking that he can threaten you. Shheheheheheheh.

I think that's all my words, I seem to have run out.

I hope that big lump of nothing text (800-ish words 😰) was enough to make up for my sudden dissapearence after promising to talk about bill TWO WEEKS AGO

Forgive my probably dogshit spelling and grammar pls

and hope you have a good day/night/whatever!

IUAHAHSHSHSHSHHSHDHSHAHS I LOVE THINGS LIKE THIS IN MY INBOX!!!!! Because it’s like wow, you did all the work for me! 😊

Ugh, this is so good tho. I always love to hear your thoughts, you are one of my FAV anons!!!!!

[nitrowyverine]

I think I write dating sim/VNs/etc reviews now? Anyway,

LOST IN LIMBO REVIEW/THOUGHTS

This VN piqued my interest, so I gave the demo a shot! This review will follow the same general format as my Obscura/Touchstarved review, except there's 7 (!!!) romance options.

Since I totally loved this game, I'm going to put the conclusion promo up here too: if Lost in Limbo interests you, consider playing it Here, Here on steam, and/or backing it Here!

ALSO! THIS REVIEW CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR THE DEMO!

My (long winded) thoughts are below:

(Banner image courtesy of the Ravenstar Games tumblr account pinned post. Individual character pics courtesy of tumblr posts from the studio. Individual posts are linked in character titles.)

Gameplay design thoughts:

the plot immediately sucked me in, I'm pretty invested in whatever the hell is going on with the protag, the realms, the lords, etc. I think the setup/land are deep enough to draw me in, but not so intimidating in it's depth that I'm afraid to explore more.

I always enjoy a little bit of nightmare fuel in my games, so the voidbound are perfect. They're so gross and horrible, but not just a stock zombie/nightmare creature design. Whenever the voidbound pop up, it makes the back of my neck itch, which is perfect.

I have no idea whose route I'll pick first. Usually I have one candidate that I can pick out as number 1. This game however? I go back and forth all the time, since I love all of them. I do think I have bias for Ara/Gael/Amon/Envy, maybe?

I really want to design an MC to doodle for this, but I feel like I don't know enough about other people in the realm. (Mostly, I'm assuming that standard humans don't have pointy ears? how close to our reality is the regular world?) I might say "screw it" and design an MC anyway (with some speculative clothing for once they get cleaned up)

The backgrounds have been great set pieces so far. Sometimes I catch myself just kinda staring into space at them. They've got a fantastic flavor.

Misc. Thoughts written during a replay

Fun touch to have Evie's rock image from the beginning fortune shop scene line up with the 7 LI's color schemes.

Each of the VA's does a lovely job with their voices. I've been turned off of certain dating sims because of bad voice acting, but the acting in this game is superb so far. It really helps set the richness of the story.

I have a theory that the LI's (and possibly people in Limbo in general) experience pain differently. The characters seem largely uninterested in the MC's stabbed, weakened state, beyond a "Oh that sucks....we'll clean you up later" mentality. I wonder if they have different pain tolerances, or are just less attached to such things. (Then again, Amon and Raeya have full missing limbs/eyes, so they probably have a decent perspective on pain altogether)

What does wielder/non-wielder mean? Xal says the MC "Can't wield, can't see." What do the LI's see that we don't? Ara mentions that the MC seems "Completely normal". Many mysteries.

I need those monster forms like crazy oh my goodness. Please devs PLEASE SHOW THE MONSTER FORMS

Now, to the lovely love interests!

Amon

WHO LET THIS MAN BE OVER 7 FEET TALL? PRIDE YOU HAVE SOME EXPLAINING TO DO

I only just noticed he also has a few freckles, *chefs kiss* (Waaaiit do all of them have little freckle skin textures??? Oh this is a glorious day.)

It's hard not to love a big friendly guy. I was honestly relieved when he first showed up, because I did Envy's route first, and I was thrilled to see a friendly face in the big dark scary woods.

This does not mean, however, that I'm not excited to see what this guy turns into when he's mad.

I like that he has pity for MC when they first show up, but I do worry it makes his resolve weaker. I'm not as confident that he could handle society/reality breaking down as well as the others. Can he put aside his affable nature for when shit hits the fan?

Question: What level of fight had to happen for Amon to lose his eye? He's already huge, and has some sort of telekinetic powers. My theory is that he was taken by surprise, maybe by someone close to him.....(Envy I'm looking at you)

RIP Amon you would have loved Hawaiian shirts

Conclusion: Most likely to be the camp counselor who hurts his back from always giving piggy back rides. Least likely to keep his composure during a badly timed pun/dad joke.

Raeya

I'm fighting for my life whenever shes on screen good LORD

Similarly to Amon, I GOTTA know the story behind her prosthetic arm. Its so rad looking, but how did she lose a whole arm? (I am also considering that she was also not born with one)

Playing the demo again, she makes a specific comment about the monsters having not "infected a limb" of the MC. My bet is that's how she lost her arm.

I wish I could have spent 1:1 time with her, but it wasn't offered in the demo. I'd love to have like, a sit down discussion with her about history. (Well I'd be fine getting lectured about history and drinking tea and hanging out)

Out of everyone's motivations, I think I understood Raeya's the most. Even if she was against MC, I think her concerns are completely valid. If an alien fell out of the sky from a different reality to earth I'd ALSO be taking every precaution

She and Amon have matching ear chains, that's adorable....

I hope I can take her on a nice date and spoil her and let her relax in the full game, pretty please. Nothing bad will happen right???

Conclusion: Most likely to gently remind the waiter that you said NO pickles with your order, thank you very much. Least likely to admit to being the one who farted in a crowded room.

Envy

every other line from him is "UGGGHHH" and i love that for them.

After playing, I think I've finally realized that I've got a soft spot for grumps. just grumpy lil friends with their pouty faces

I want (vivi's) Envy's nails SO BAD. I need him to do my nails because theirs are perfect. Envy, envy PLEASE

They pretend not to care, but are already getting attached to the MC by the end of the demo. I can't wait to see what they're like when they actually DO get attached

Elephant in the room, what could he have possibly done to get himself demoted so severely? Everyone seems to be fine with him being demoted except Amon, who sheepishly vouches for him when he can.

I just wanna wrap him in a blanket burrito like you do with a spicy kitten. and then give him little smooches

Conclusion: Most likely to be they guy who gets one drink at a party and sits in the corner with the dog/cat all night. Least likely to allow their partner to willingly boop their nose with any regularity.

Pride

Old man yells at cloud? No....old man IS cloud.

The dev's tumblr has mentioned that he's a pathetic old man, but for now at least, I am afraid of his authority and power. since hes like. yaknow. the big god of this world

The VA did some fabulous work for his voice. I definitely got actual chills in certain parts. 10/10

Okay, so WHAT is this guy's deal with mirrors? He looks great, why is he worried about it. I sincerely doubt he's just 52 though, if he's a god. (as a note for all these interests, I have a feeling that the ages are their physical ages, and not their actual ages. Or at least, age relative to ours. I think they're much older in our years than in their years.)

We also didn't get any 1:1 time with Pride in the demo, so I'm fascinated to see what alone time with Pride would be like. Is he quiet? a chatterbox? Just a guy??? does he only play piano and not talk to you. (power move)

Conclusion: Most likely to show up WAY over-prepared for Parent-Teacher conferences. Least likely to understand and survive the cinnamon challenge.

Ara

Certified CUTIE PIE

We got a pretty clear demonstration of everyone's powers in the demo, except for Ara. Unless it was too subtle for me to realize, I'm not actually sure what her cool powers are yet.

If she DOESN'T have plant powers I'd be very surprised.

I keep wanting to think things like "I have to protect her" or "keep her safe at all costs". But then I remember she's likely absolutely terrifying, and I honestly should be actually afraid for anyone who gets in her way.

I would like to remind/inform everyone that so far, she is the only member of the cast who is visibly armed at all times. (Raeya doesn't count even if her arm claws look really really sharp.)

If I have to pick anyone to party with, it's probably Ara. I know she'd throw an absolute rager, but would also make sure you stay hydrated. I wanna hold her hand too. Please?

I'll go butch for her, i'll do it if thats what she wants. I'm weak

Conclusion: Most likely to be able convince you to give her your kidney. Least likely to let you skip a bloodthirsty game of monopoly because you "Have a headache"

Gael

where did he find pants long enough for him.

Okay. So its HIS fault that Amon has the deepest V-cut since time immemorial. Do you think Amon and Gael had an extensive argument about the minimum amount of clothes Amon has to wear at any given time? Because I do.

His powers certainly did not. Awaken anything in me. Nope.

he has the shortest and most perfect arc from stranger -> friendly -> ???? -> BETRAYAL

I am MASSIVELY curious about his dissociation/spacing out during the demo. He was 8 million miles away in the tower for some reason, and I HAVE to find out why. I just KNOW this man is doing some questionable shit with good intentions and I can't wait to find out what it is.

So, he has SOME issue with touch. No idea what it is, but I can't wait to find out what it is. Also noting he's the only one with full-coverage gloves in the cast. Interesting...

Conclusion: Most likely to cry after being sent those sad FB/insta animal stories. Least likely to let you open your own car/carriage/etc door under any circumstances.

Xal

He looks so soft. I have to bully him, in a good way. (Like grim from Date with Death)

I am fascinated as to why he would lie for MC. That's such a great hook to his character. What does a guy who so desperately wants to be left alone have to see to stick his neck out for a stranger?

SOMEONE get this man a NINTENDO DS POST HASTE

THIS GAME HAS TO GET FUNDED BECAUSE XAL SAYS HE HAS A CAT AND I WANT TO SEE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I will do it, I will be the one to tuck him in when he is too eepy. I will carry him to bed and kiss his little head good night

Wait, if he can "Figure something out" by touching it, he could be like, the worlds greatest doctor. Xal please get off the couch and help me diagnose mystery ailments in a medical sitcom

Conclusion: Most likely to injure himself rigging up a Rue Goldberg machine to scratch his back. Least likely take it easy on you once he learns how to play super smash bros. (He's a fox/falco main)

Concerns:

What the Ravenstar team has already been able to accomplish is incredible. I'm worried that with 7 whole love interests (with a possible two more on the way if the kickstarter goes well), i'm worried the devs are taking on a whole lot of work. I think they're fully capable of taking this on, but I hope they don't burn themselves out in the process.

I'm pretty happy to see the kickstarter is moving along, but there's always the chance that something happens, and/or the kickstarter goal isn't met. BY THE TIME I FINISHED WRITING THIS IT GOT FUNDED LETS GOO!!! I still hope this project makes it all the way to completion beyond the kickstarter. Things can always happen, so Ive got my fingers crossed for the Ravenstar team!

OVERALL CONCLUSION:

I loved the demo, and I have now backed the project! The team is trying to hit stretch goals now, so share Lost in Limbo with your buddies! I crave content for this game like nothing else.

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

What about an AU where it’s not Adam and Eve but Adam and Lucifer.

Lilith and Adam are created from the dust as equals as usual to make love to each other, but Adam instead falls in love with Lucifer after Lilith being a little shit to him.

Out of spite for being denied control of Adam and losing him to an angel, Lilith leaves the garden. Angels, not accepting how Adam might not want to lie with women, make him a new wife, Eve. But he doesn’t want her either, just down for his little angel. And makes it clear one night.

That shatters Eve’s world and makes her incredibly devastated as she thinks she failed in serving her husband and making him happy with her that he doesn’t want her. She gets away from him for a while and begins searching for a cure.

Only to stumble to Lilith of all people, who had returned to the garden after hearing about the new bride she could trick easier.

She leads her to the Tree of Knowledge, and says all she has to do is to bite from the apple and get Adam to do so too -But she can’t tell him what it is, that way it wouldn’t work- if she wants them to be truly happy like the angels told them they would be.

In desperation and cause she had no idea what lying was, Eve accepts, takes two apples from the tree, brings them to where she and Adam sleep, and gets Adam to eat it by saying it’s a regular fruit. Which causes sin to enter the world.

After noticing it, the angels were simply going to throw the two to Earth and Lilith to Hell, but how Lilith screamed about Adam loving Lucifer and that was why he denied to lie with women caused a problem.

Adam and Lucifer both denied it violently, but how Lucifer tried too hard to get the angels to let Adam and Eve stay, how much time they spent before and how close they were physically for most only fueled their suspicions.

So, they decided to look into their memories and see that they were clearly in love. In one they admit it, in one they kiss intimately and in one Lucifer is literally making love to Adam.

And that makes them furious.

They rip Lucifer from his status as an angel, and make him Adam’s new wife instead by giving him both a woman’s and a man’s parts, they do the same to Adam, and also put a baby fever curse on the pair so they would have no escape in populating the Earth where they are sent afterwards. Eve is sent too, but she goes to a completely different place all alone and lives a life of isolation.

Either Lucifer is mostly forced to submit and be the one pregnant because of the curse and how the angels wanted to humiliate him for being with a human, or Adam is because the angels officialy took his title as the first man away and “downgraded him into the level of woman he was too good for”.

I like them both a lot so I’ll just make two versions.

Wow, got a little longer than I thought there..

Whaddya think?

Wow that's sad and amazing. I like both ideas but you know me lol

Adam being "downgraded" when really it makes him happy to have kids with his love.

[softfeelingsandangstywriting]

my thoughts about how Stanley got into the In-Between in the HWINEBHABWNAJCAHOWEEATOWEUB au :3 bc he's my son and i am in terrible terrible pain. i just got a little silly and neeeeeded to get this out of my brain

@a-scary-lack-of-common-sense i'm lowkey (highkey) sure you didn't want 2 be pinged but here is my offering (ricky, when i catch you ricky. when i catch you ricky. ricky when i catch you ricky. ricky when i catch you ricky--)

uhh word count is ~600, just a little baby drabble

---

Shadows. Gold and red, triangles and hands and overwhelming fear.

Stanley.

Stanley, Stanley, Stanley, the cause for Ford’s own terror, he was with the gold and not the scarlet, but he was not supposed to be there, so close to the screaming dangerdangerdangerdangerdanger.

So far from them, he could see his brother's lips moving, moving fast, no doubt speaking whatever he thought may get him out of the situation.

Good, Ford thought bitterly. The demon was his problem and his problem alone, born of his own foolishness.

He’d be damned if Stanley found his way into its maw because of him. He needed to get up, get going, movemovemove before he lost something so dear to him once more. Fidds had been enough to teach him his lesson right and proper.

(Stanford tried to ignore that he’d almost missed the universe’s cue. That he’d almost continued his work towards the likely end of his species.)

No, no– He was almost stilled by the choking darkness, as though he were moving through a sea of molasses to get to his brother. The great beast’s eye did not move, but he could feel its look upon his skin, boring through flesh and sinew and bone into the very depths of his skull. His struggles had drawn its attention.

Yet still, it did not look as starved as it did trapped.

And its newest victim was its only likely way out.

STANLEY!

His voice, though loud in his ears, rang out exactly nowhere. This damn place, trapping him as a witness. Could he fight it? Could he push against it? Where even was he?? A mindscape? If so, who’s? Stanley’s? Because this was a very depressing mind if so. But it wasn’t his, and he had incredible doubts it was Cipher’s. And that was hinging on the question of if they could enter his or not.

A dream, maybe. He prayed it was a terrible, awful, fever-dream vivid nightmare.

That he was very much consciously thinking about and aware of. He wasn’t one to experience lucid dreams, they’d never come to him as easily as they did–

Right, Stanley. Stanley. How had he forgotten? It was, quite literally, the most important task at hand. He needed to try and do something, fight against the oppressing disgust the place was beginning to cause him and the way it felt as though it was beginning to crawl into his limbs and settle there, weighing him down.

Shit. Keep moving, keep kicking. If he stopped he might not try again to get up and that would leave his twin all on his lonesome.

Red and yellow and white and black black black black black black black black– It was all alarmingly starting to mix together in his swimming head. It was getting to him.

What was getting to him?

Right. Stan. Stan. He had to move. The scarlet was being swallowed up by the grow of the golden glow and that was never a good sign.

Stanley still wasn’t looking at him, he’d hardly moved besides the short, uncomfortable fidgets Ford knew of him (they hadn’t talked in so long. Did he get any back from their childhood, out from under pa’s thumb? Did he lose any? How well did he even still know his brother?) and the occasional glance around when the triangle had moved.

Oh, but now he was hastily backing up. A good idea. Ford was closer, but still not close enough.

Not enough to reach Stanley. Not enough to stop the gilded arm that grabbed at his twin while Ford shrieked.

Up it went, the pyramid breaking its shape to bend backwards and

down

and

down

and

down.

And Stanley was gone.

[quinacridonered]

Rings of Power Recap - Season 2, Episode 6

Orc #1: All I wanted was to settle quietly in a suburb of Mordor.

Orc #2: You still can. 

Orc #3: Put a downpayment on an ox… 

Orc #1: Get a warg puppy for the wee ones…

Arondir: Nope.

—

Passing Mouse: You look like you’ve been subsisting on pizza, but apparently it’s all scrap metal?

Assistants: Good point. Lord Celebrimbor?

Celebrimbor: Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow… Creeps at this petty pace from day to day…

Mirdania: Shall we order some pizza, my lord?

Celebrimbor: Who the fuck are you?

Sauron: Perhaps you should stop spending the food budget on Red Bull and vodka.

—

Eregion Citizens: Lord Celebrimbor!

Sauron: I’m taking over. What’s up, citizens?

City Guards: The only inbound traffic has been dead bodies covered in foreign graffiti.

Sauron: All is well. You are getting very sleepy. 

Mirdania: I don’t feel sleepy. Your new dress is making me very awake indeed.

Sauron: Don’t worry, we’ll get you one just like it.

—

Orc Daddy: We both love-hate Sauron. Friends forever?

Galadriel: You are the only one who understands.

Orc Daddy: Look, I got you fresh produce and everything.

Galadriel: Aw. You’re really trying.

Orc Daddy: What’s new in your world?

Galadriel: *full disclosure of elven state secrets*

Orc Daddy: You know how Sauron makes you feel seen and understood, and then you give him what he wants, and then he totally fucks you over?

Galadriel: Uh-huh…

Orc Daddy: I did mention he was my leader and teacher for centuries, right?

Galadriel: What’s Black Speech for “fuck my life”?

—

Elendil: Traitor!

Pharazon: Takes one to know one.

Elendil: The Valar will show who’s right.

Pharazon: Brilliant idea. 

—

Homeless Wizard: What episode is it?

Tom Bombadil: Episode 6, why?

Homeless Wizard: Does time flow differently in Rhûn? My plot feels like it hasn’t moved in months.

Tom Bombadil: Fine. Here’s the next bit. Betray your friends or doom the world.

Homeless Wizard: Suddenly I miss when you were just forcing me to bathe.

—

Poppy’s Love Life: *occurs*

—

King Durin: Look who’s here!

Prince Durin: Annatar. You look… asymmetrical.

Sauron: What can I give you for more mithril? Timber? Grain? Eregion’s finest virgins every full moon?

Prince Durin: I need a shower just talking to you.

King Durin: I am knee deep in all the virgins I could possibly want.

Balrog, via Fire Zoom Call: Cousin! Missed ya, where you been?

Sauron:  Spent a millennium as evil goo. Not my best moment.

Balrog: Sworn enemies?

Sauron: Disloyal minions.

Balrog: Gets you every time.

King Durin: *taking notes* Watch out… for disloyal… minions…

—

Disa: Is he still…

Prince Durin: He’s worse.

Disa: I hear the League of Disloyal Minions is looking for new members.

Prince Durin: He’s my Dad. I can’t do it.

Disa: Who do you fear more, me or him?

Prince Durin: Tough call, but frankly, you.

—

Pharazon: We’re gonna feed you to the Sea Wyrm. 

Elendil: I’ll take that over your company.

Miriel: Over my dead body. I mean it literally.

Guards: Incoming!

Eldritch Marine Horror: I’m hangry.

Miriel: I am the rightful monarch of Numenor.

Eldritch Marine Horror: For fuck’s sake. This used to be a normal ocean. Now it’s crawling with the cosmically significant. Is there at least a fish and chips?

Pharazon: We can hook you up with some gumbo.

Crowd: MI-RI-EL!

Giant Eagle: My god, they are fickle here.

—

Eregion Citizens: Oh shit. Orcs. Many.

Sauron: Celebrimbor! Chop fucking chop! I can’t move this whole forge into a trebuchet projectile shelter now, can I? You wanted the world’s tallest tower and now you work in the world’s easiest target!

Celebrimbor: This is the point in our relationship where I normalise physical violence.

Sauron: Baby, I thought you’d never ask.

—

Hallucinatory Eregion Citizens: What a fine sunny day we are having in the middle of the night. 

Clock tower: *strikes thirteen*

Sauron: Asking nicely for the last time: make the fucking rings. Here’s your grandpa’s hammer. Go get ‘em, tiger, etc.

Celebrimbor: Rings… Gotta make some rings…

Sauron: Servants! New case of Red Bull and some Zero Age tequila! Let's party like it's 1999!

[zxxccx]

Don't Take Too Long

This is a work of fiction. All characters are 18+. Contains male fart fetish, piss, and scat content.

Senior year was almost over. We were all looking forward to being done with high school and the end was in sight. We just had a few more random assignments left, finals, and then graduation. I was sitting in class one day and went to get my homework out of my backpack. After looking for a bit, I realized I didn't have it and must have left it in my locker. So, I got up and asked the teacher for the hall pass so that I could get it. As I was walking out of the classroom, one of my classmates named Josh called out to me. Josh was your typical gym bro and had a big ass. I turned to see what he wanted and he said, “Don't take too long, I have to take a massive dump.” I looked at him with a mix of confusion and disgust. After a few seconds, his friend Joe who was sitting behind him said, “What are you wanting for? You heard him, hurry up!” And with that I left and tried put that weird interaction out of my mind. Why did jocks think that poop and fart jokes are so funny?

My high school was actually a small campus with multiple buildings on it. Of course, given how life works, my locker was in a completely different building than the one my class was in. So, it took me a while to get to my locker, get my homework, and walk back. And let's be honest, I was a senior in high school so it's not like I was exactly in a rush to get back to class. When I did get back to the classroom, I was surprised to see Josh standing outside, almost like he was waiting for me. “I thought I told you not to take too long. You think it's funny for me to me have to sit there and hold it in while I wait for you to get back with the hall pass? You're lucky the teacher’s chill and let me out anyway.” I didn't think I had done anything wrong, but wanting to avoid conflict I apologized anyway. Apparently that wasn't good enough for Josh though because he told me sorry wasn't going to cut it and that he thought I needed to be taught a lesson. He told me to follow him and then grabbed my arm and started leading me down the hallway. I tried to say something but he told me to shut up and said that if I tried to make a scene I'd regret it. He was significantly stronger than me so I figured it was in my best interest to listen.

Finally, Josh pulled me into the bathroom. I was very confused at this point but, before I could ask what was going on, Josh shoved to the ground and forced me to lie on my back on the grimey bathroom floor. I went to sit up and tell him off, but he held me down, spun around, and sat his ass on my face. This made me try to protest even harder (even though my protests were heavily muffled by his ass), but Josh reacted by simply ripping a nasty fart on my face. It smelled absolutely disgusting and made me gag. All of the sudden, I heard the bathroom door open. I started freaking out because I didn't want anyone to see me like this, but it turned out to just be Joe. Based on his reaction, him and Josh both found my current position to be hilarious. “Damn, can't believe we're actually gonna fucking do this to him. It's gonna be so nasty!”, Joe said.

I had no idea what he was talking about, but I wasn't kept in the dark for long. While still sitting on my face, Josh explained their plan: “I was pretty pissed when you took your fucking time coming back with the hall pass after I told you I needed to shit. So, Joe and I got to talking and we decided you needed to learn the error of your ways.” Josh paused for a second, pulled down the back of his shorts and boxers, and slammed his bare ass down on my face. I was caught completely off guard by this and unwittingly took a breath in through my nose. His ass smelled awful. He continued, “Now I'm sure you're already having a rough time down there, but I don't think you realize how much it sucks to be you right now. Ya see, I haven't taken my dump yet and you're in a pretty unfortunate spot. I was originally just planning to shit on your face and leave you to deal with that, but then Joe said it would be even better if I shat in your mouth and made you eat it. I thought that was the most disgusting thing I'd ever heard, but I decided it was too good of an opportunity to pass up on. If we're doing this to teach you a lesson, might as well make sure it sticks. But in all seriousness, there are two reasons we're gonna do this to you. First, it'll be fucking hilarious and will probably scar you for life, and second…because we can.”

I was horrified. There's no way I would let this happen. I started squirming as much as I could to try to get away. They both found this hilarious. I was no match for Josh's body weight though and only succeeded in tiring myself out and making myself sniff Josh's rank ass more. I decided I had to try to scream for help. Unfortunately, that idea ended up working against me. Not only was I not able to get any meaningful noise out from under Josh's ass, but the minute I opened my mouth, he spread his cheeks and firmly pressed has asshole down over my mouth. This resulted in my mouth being locked open by his body weight with my lips sealed around his hole. I felt like my skull was going to crack from the pressure. “Bad move buddy”, Josh said with a laugh. He punctuated that thought with a massive fart that echoed in my mouth. I gagged and started to struggle again. “If you thought that was bad, you're really not going to like what's coming”, he added, ”Hope you're hungry, because I'm about to burst!” Him and Joe started laughing again. He ripped a few more farts into my mouth and I felt like my taste buds were going to burn off. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I began to accept my fate.

Then, it happened, I felt Josh's asshole start to expand. “Here it comes”, he said while grunting. He continued to push and a large turd started to slide into my mouth. Nothing could have prepared me for the taste when it first touched my tongue. It was absolutely rancid - very bitter and slimy with earthy notes as well. I thought I was going to be sick, but Josh kept pushing and next thing I know I felt the log start to slide down my throat. “Look you can see his throat bulging. This is awesome!”, Joe said. He sounded thrilled. As the turd slid further down my throat, Josh and Joey continued to talk and crack jokes at my expense. Meanwhile, I was being completely defiled and the two of them could care less. Finally, after another minute of pushing, the end of the turd came out of Josh's ass. Most of it was already down my throat, but part of it was still in my mouth.

Josh told me to swallow it, because there was more to come. I didn't know if I'd be able to bring myself to do that but then, as if he was reading my mind, Joe told me that if I puked they'd make me eat that too. Seeing no other options, I forced myself to swallow the turd. Josh and Joe were elated by this. Josh continued to take his dump as if I were just a toilet. Apparently he wasn't joking when he said he had to take a massive dump. Over the course of what felt like ten minutes, he forced two more sizable turds down my throat followed by one smaller one. My stomach felt really full with all his shit. Then, to add insult to injury, he told me he wouldn't get up until I licked his asshole clean which resulted in my tongue getting up close and personal with his shit once again. When I finally thought it was over, Josh had one more surprise in store. He told me he was feeling generous and wanted to help wash the taste out of my mouth. He then pulled out his dick, aimed it at my mouth, and told me I better open up if I didn't want to go around smelling like piss the rest of the day. His piss was acrid and unpleasant, but nowhere near as bad as his shit.

Josh finally got up and I just laid there. I couldn't bring myself to move. I was relieved that this ordeal was finally over. That relief was short lived though when I looked up and saw Joe holding his phone with the camera pointing at me. He had filmed the whole thing! They both found it funny how horrified I was. After capturing my reaction Joe put his phone away. I went to sit up and beg him to delete the video, but he pushed me back down. “Who said you're done?”, he asked. “Lunch didn't agree with me today and Josh shouldn't be the only one who gets to have fun. Hope you saved room for dessert!” I started freaking out again, but he was easily able to hold me in place and I eventually ended up with him sitting his bare ass down on my face. I wasn't about to let them put me through that again, so I refused to open my mouth. A swift hit to my nuts took care of that though, and once again I found myself in a familiar position filled with dread.

Like Joe said, whatever he had for lunch was not sitting well with him. This resulted in his dump being a lot less solid than Josh’s. He began with some wet farts before I was presented with a mouthful of mush. The texture alone made me gag and the taste made me wish I didn't have taste buds. After making me swallow that, I was presented with two more mouthfuls that were pretty similar to the first. Joe's “grand finale” really took the cake though and made me regret thinking things couldn't get any worse. His final push filled my mouth to the brim with liquid diarrhea. It almost overflowed, but the seal between his asshole and my mouth was too tight. Realizing what just happened, Joe burst out laughing and then told me not to swallow under threat of Josh standing full weight on my balls. As much as I wanted to get the disgusting liquid out of my mouth, I did as I was told. Joe, then ordered me to swish his shit around like it was mouthwash and really take in the flavor. I didn't want to, but Josh starting to put pressure on my balls with his foot helped persuade me. I hated every second of it until they finally let me swallow. Joe also made me lick his asshole clean, but didn't give me the “courtesy” of rinsing out my mouth with piss like Josh did.

After he stood up, before pulling up his pants, Joe said they should see how good I did at cleaning his asshole. He picked up the homework I had dropped and wiped his ass with it. When he was done, it had a large streak of shit on it. “Whelp, guess someone's getting a zero. Hopefully you'll do a better job next time”, he said. He crumpled up the homework and threw it in the trash. As I got up, I shuddered at the idea of there being a next time. I wanted to run into the nearest stall and puke or at the very least rinse my mouth out with water from the sink, but the two of them where insistent that it was important for me to savor the flavor and fully digest their loads. They made me walk back to class with them and I was surprised that the teacher didn't question the fact that we all came back together or were gone for so long. When asked about my homework, I didn't want to give Josh and Joe an excuse to torture me more, so I just said I couldn't find it.

Fortunately, the two of them actually left me alone for the rest of the school year and never forced me to go through that again. I guess they had their fun and were done with me. They still did manage to get one more blow in though. One night, I got a text from an unknown number telling me that I had been gifted a video from a pay-per-view porn site. I initially thought it was spam, but curiosity got the better of me and I clicked the link. I was completely shocked to see it was the video of Josh using me as a toilet. His face was blurred and his and Joe's voices were altered, but it was still clear exactly what was happening. It was awful seeing myself in that position and having to relive the moment. But the biggest surprise came at the end of the video. When Josh finally got up, my face wasn't blurred and when I begged Joe to stop filming my voice wasn't altered. I felt a pit in my stomach and started to cry. I couldn't believe that this was out there. I looked at the profile that uploaded it and saw they had a second video available for purchase. Based on the thumbnail, I could tell it was my shitty experience with Joe.

All of the sudden, my phone rang. It was the unknown number. Nervously, I picked up. It was Joe. He asked me if I liked the video. I begged him to take both videos down, but he said not a chance. He also told me that if I ever told anyone about what him and Josh did to me, he would make sure everyone I knew saw the videos. He ended the call by telling me that he hopes I never forget the experience and that if I ever wanted to taste his shit again, all I have to do is call. I cried myself to sleep that night. I was glad when graduation came, because it meant that I didn't have to see Josh and Joe every day anymore since I went to a different college than them. But when I was home during breaks, if I ran into either of them while I was out, they would give me knowing grins and brag about how much money they made from the videos they posted. That combined with recurring nightmares in which I was back in that bathroom with them meant that the experience was a constant presence in the back of my mind. I would always remember what had happened and I would never forget the vile taste.

[tater-tot-jr]

Yapping time! Spoilers for DRDT C2E14

So the entire episode was great, but there’s one part I’d like to talk about most. David’s monologue towards the end. Specifically the second half, where he gets away from his logical stuff and into the more interpersonal stuff. I’ll break it down line by line.

“All I want is for Teruko to distrust others.”

Okay we are starting off interesting. Now, due to David’s nature we can’t trust him to be honest. We cannot take this as explicit confirmation of any sort of goal. With that said, his goal appears to be fucking up the class trial in some manner. We don’t know his motive, but that goal seems consistent enough to work with. So let’s work with it. Teruko is literally one half of this classes helpful trial participants. Her and Charles are the entire brain of this class. Charles can be killed, he has a glaring flaw in a debilitating fear of blood, he’s easy enough to deal with when the time comes. Teruko is stupidly resilient. To everything. The one thing she obviously struggles with is her trust issues/paranoia. If you’re looking to get under her skin that’s where you gotta go. Saying this is a clear demonstration he intends to poke at Teruko emotionally, which is an interesting thing to admit out loud. If I had to guess, it’s because he’s trying to kill two birds with one stone and make the class start to distrust Teruko as well.

“That’s why I’m doing this, telling such obvious lies.”

This is him saying he’s lying about seeing the body, I think. He’s doubling down on inciting paranoia, in both Teruko and the class. It’s interesting he would say this out loud. He’s hyper focused on fucking with Teruko and it shows. If you take out the brain, the body goes as well. It’s certainly a strategy of all time.

“There is no other proof of Eden’s innocence.”

As far as we know, this is a true statement right now. Unless I’m unaware of something that was the biggest piece of evidence meant to clear her name, and he brought it into question.

“As long as there’s a possibility that the evidence is false, as long as there’s even the slightest reason to distrust others, then Teruko cannot trust Eden.”

Oof, he’s got her dead to rights. I don’t think there’s a good faith argument for him being wrong. It’s cool to see how much he understands the cast. It’s an interesting way to show how Teruko’s thoughts process works without betraying her guarded nature. Having a character so ready to pick at her weakness is a good writing choice, and I hope they keep David around for a time. Teruko is the least trusting character I’ve ever seen in any fangan game, granted I haven’t played them all but still. There’s a chance the story doesn’t have any sort of lesson, and we’re just gonna watch Teruko suffer. The idea that she can’t bring herself to trust if there’s even a 0.001% chance of something being false is such a good character flaw. She’s clearly terrified of risk, and she doesn’t know how to get rid of her paranoia, even though I think she wants to.

“Isn’t that right, Teruko?”

Ohohoho you smug piece of shit. You fucking dick. This is more proof he’s not just saying these things in an objective way. He’s just trying to hurt her, as far as we can assume.

“…”

Yeah she’s fucking rocked. Teruko really doesn’t take things lying down. Befitting of her backstory, she’s the type to struggle and fight back against anything she can. But here she has nothing to say. David has read her for filth and they both know it. Now that I think about it, this probably also plays on her fear of being vulnerable. What could possibly be more vulnerable than someone telling you your own exact thought process?

“It’s in your nature to distrust people.”

This is a more interesting statement than it appears at first glance. Specifically because he says it’s in her nature. To him, this isn’t a choice she’s making because of the killing game. It’s not circumstance that has pushed her into this. No, this is who she is, and this is who she’ll always be. Which is a horribly insulting thing to say, because it’s within most humans nature to trust each other somewhat, and it’s life circumstances that push them away from collaboration. He’s saying that Teruko is so fucked in the head that she’s fundamentally different from the standard human baseline.

“Everyone you know has already betrayed you. There’s no one in this world who won’t hurt you. Even the people you love will turn their backs on you in the end. You know that well enough, don’t you?”

…Jesus Christ. He really is just the devil on her shoulder. These are her worst thoughts said out loud and back to her. Do you think she considers someone dying on her and leaving her alone a betrayal? Is that a part of this? Him saying “even the people you love” is interesting, does she really even have anyone she loves in the cast? Or does she just tolerate them. He’s making grand, sweeping statements about her life potentially before the killing game and hitting the nail on the head every time. An impressive feat of manipulation and perceptiveness.

“So distrust in others. Because that’s the only way you know how to live.”

Ow. Ouch. Owie. Not only is this a banger way to end the monologue but it’s just so telling. Teruko doesn’t even say anything in response she just waits for Charles to change to subject. Also, is he even really wrong? She tried to afford people trust and then she got stabbed and everyone else blamed her. She’s definitely swung too far the other way, but it’s not like she was good at knowing how much trust to afford people. This life is really the only way she knows how to live. How things are now, she’ll suffer any other way. It’s such juicy character writing. Damned if you do damned if you don’t. David has definitely been watching Teruko’s behavior, and quite frankly he has her figured out. He’s perceived her, and she hates it. I think we all know Teruko is lonely, she deeply wants people around her. But between being a danger to them and all her trust issues she shuts herself away. David is doing everything he can to keep her as far away from forming meaningful connections as possible. He’s clearly got some sort of plan.

—

There’s also a few things I want to talk about that I didn’t have the ability to put under a spoken line, so I’ll yap down here.

Firstly, Teruko extending some “trust” to Eden doesn’t prove David wrong. If anything, it strengthens his argument. Looking at the actual content of Teruko and Eden’s back and forth, it’s barely a scrap of trust and it’s completely conditional. Teruko basically said “because you helped me last trial I will trust you enough to investigate you second” which is still incredible progress for her, but it’s nothing close to genuine trust. This is not to diminish the progress Teruko made in that scene, but it’s nothing close to countering David’s claims.

Secondly, THAT VOICE ACTING HELLO?!?? David’s VA has always been great, but combined with DRDTdev’s wonderful writing and sprite design/choices he really brought this scene to life. He was perfectly smug and condescending. He had a voice that really portrayed that “I’m 100% right about you and you can’t do anything about it” vibe. Just a total piece of shit. 10/10 would listen again.

[subby-succubus]

Imagine you're sitting in my lap and I'm giving you pills from an unlabeled bottle. Little capsules, all different colors, almost like candy. You keep taking them like a good little whore, sucking my fingers each time. You have no idea what they are, and you don't care. You'd do anything you were told to do AND you'd probably take a pill you found on the ground. There was no way this could ever be your limit.

Your head is spinning a little already. The lights are brighter than they should be. You can mostly think clearly. Well, you THINK you're thinking clearly. Oh, it's time for the next pill! How many is that? Has to be more than five, couldn't be more than, um... Twenty? You think maybe they're starting to really kick in now. Every sense is pulsing, growing and receding in intensity. You try to say something, but it slips out of your mouth and turns into a few happy syllables. "I know, Angel. Here, one more."

I ask what you want to do. You giggle and turn and slip to the floor. You reach for my belt and fumble at the buckle. I smile at you as I undo it and strip off my pants. "Of course we can."

Your mouth isn't so much opened for me as it is hanging limp, but it's warm and wet all the same. I take hold of your hair and push inside your throat. I'm having to do all the work, but you seem happy enough. You're not blacking out just yet, but it can't be far away. You moan and fumble at your own tits and pretend to help me fuck you, but you're getting limper with every passing second.

I figure I'm ready to move on. You figure you're ready to go to sleep. We can both have what we want, really. I strip off what little you're wearing, and the last thing you feel as you drift away is the head of my cock starting to enter your...

Imagine you're waking up, right where you went to sleep. How long has it been? You're still naked. I'm still there. I have one hand on your cheek and the other jerking my cock, slowly. When I see your eyes flutter open, I speed up. You try to say something. Try.

I take my hand off my cock to grab the pill bottle. I shake three of them into your hand. "Go ahead."

You take them, of course. Then I throw back the rest of the bottle into my mouth and swallow them all.

You're shocked. I'm laughing. My hand is back on my cock, making myself cum on your face. "It was a joke, silly slut. They're all placebos!" I smear my load across your face, let you down gently to a lying position. I wipe my cock on your clothes, throw them on top of you, and walk away.

Now imagine that before starting our little game tonight, I took the placebo bottle and put two dozen real pills on top of it. You swallowed them all. What were they? You don't know. I've already forgotten. Who gives a shit anyway. What matters is I drugged you into unconsciousness, did God knows what with your body, and then convinced you that you were sober the whole time. Isn't that hilarious?

- Sinister

Wow. Wow wow wow. Yes please.

I'd just keep taking anything you gave me. I'd want to be a good girl for you after all. Each pill making me more and more needy. Each time I think less and less about the consequences by replacing those thoughts with how badly I want to be obedient. I mean, I can't say no. How could I? I want so badly to please you. Wanting to pleasure you with my mouth. Wanting more, but feeling too sleepy. I fall asleep for you to do whatever you want to my little, weak body.

I wake up feeling hot and used. Not sure what happened to me. Not sure what is currently happening. Not fully understanding how I could be like that with placebos. But if you say so, it must be true. After all, you wouldn't lie to me. It's my fault for being such a dumb slut. It's my fault for being so easy.

It would just make our game so much harder for me to win. Just like it should be.

[fingertipsmp3]

Oh fuck I have the update

[ganondoodle]

the company i work for decided that its switching from the german formal "You"(Sie) to the informal "you" (Du) in all of our websites so now we have to scour the entire database to change it and i quite frankly hate that, not just bc the unecessary extra work but especially bc its such a weird and unecessary change

i bet its bc everything here is getting englishfied (both literally and culturally it feels like, when my new boss talks its half in english bc every second german word is just replaced by an english one despite there being perfectly fine words for it in german too, its so annoying) and bc they want to sound more personal in hopes of getting more clients bc 'company is your fwiend uwu!!', i know this here is the amercian tm site so you wouldnt understand really but i do not want to be greeted with 'du' by companies, no, thats too personal, you dont know me and im not giving you my data, stay away!!

i guess thats how i would describe it .. the formal you is like a polite distance, like someone you dont know staying outside your personal space, but when its the informal 'you' it feels invasive unless i told you you can call me that, and that goes double for companies

maybe its a small thing that doesnt seem important but i cant stand it, im just a little part time worker doing data work so i got no say in it but the companies founder also announced hes giving his post to his kids some time ago so ...... since then theres been alot of changes and new projects that solely aim to imitate whats popular and whats done by other companies, despite ours being one that is, or used to be, intentionally different, like, that was the POINT, but i guess chasing trends is just too appealing for CEOs

[lady-charinette]

I cannot believe the Teen Wolf Movie forced me into my old Sterek phase

I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE AN OLD STEREK PHASE

[princess-of-purple-prose]

Fish, 7 (For your prompts! ❤️)

Hi, anon!! Thank you for the prompt, you were the very first one to send one in! 7 was, again, the wildcard, so I randomly generated a different number to land on Yue Qingyuan (from Scum Villain)! I have no choice but to dedicate this to @bytedykes, because I told her about this prompt and she said “yqy pet fish mental health speedrun” and we went, uh, a little insane about it. Enjoy some yuefang, folks!!!!

“Mu-xiong,” Yue Qingyuan says. “I’m sorry to bother you. Are you available?”

“Yue-xiong is never a bother,” Mu Qingfang says warmly. “And I am, actually, yes. Is everything okay, Yue-xiong?”

“I think I need help.” A bit dramatic, perhaps, and Yue Qingyuan hates to trouble Mu Qingfang on a rare day off, but Yue Qingyuan and impulse have never been the best combination, and he would appreciate a second opinion.

Mu Qingfang’s voice turns hard. “Where are you? I'll come right away.”

“What—?” Yue Qingyuan stares at his phone like the blank call screen will tell him why Mu Qingfang suddenly sounds so serious. “I'm at home, but—”

“I'll be right there,” Mu Qingfang says, and hangs up.

Yue Qingyuan stares at his phone for another second, then lifts his gaze to his sparkling new aquarium. His new betta, white and black and resplendent of fin, stares back. Was his crisis of faith about his viability as a fish owner really so deserving of such urgency…?

—

“So,” Mu Qingfang says. “This was your emergency?” He looks about as unimpressed by the betta as it does by the two of them.

Yue Qingyuan feels obscurely like he’s being scolded. Mu Qingfang is one of the nicest men he knows, but that just means that his censure takes the form of a blunt instrument of mass disappointment.

“In my defense,” he points out meekly, “I didn’t say there was an emergency. Mu-xiong just assumed.”

“That’ll teach me,” Mu Qingfang huffs, but at least he looks amused. “Yue-xiong should get used to asking for help more so this gege doesn’t have to panic every time he does ask.”

Yue Qingyuan’s mouth almost drops open. He can only hope his cheeks aren’t as red as they feel. “Er—well, I asked this time, didn’t I?”

“You did,” Mu Qingfang allows, looking something horribly close to fond. Yue Qingyuan swallows and tries to hurry on.

“So—not an emergency, but I do want your opinion,” he coughs out. “I’m having… doubts. About the fish.” Mu Qingfang’s eyebrows contract. Yue Qingyuan rushes it out. “Do you think I should keep it?”

“Yue-xiong…” Mu Qingfang looks politely incredulous. “Why does my opinion matter? The fish is already yours, isn’t it? If you don’t think maintaining its upkeep will be feasible, that’s one thing, but… Surely Yue-xiong did the research before getting it?”

He doesn’t sound judgemental, but Yue Qingyuan feels his cheeks warm. “I did, but I wasn’t planning on getting a fish; I was only admiring the tanks. There was a salesperson who was… very insistent.”

Mu Qingfang regards him doubtfully, which is fair. Yue Qingyuan towers over most people he meets, and his bulk only further adds to the impression of immovability. It’s only when he opens his mouth that it becomes clear how spineless he actually is.

Yue Qingyuan falters. “I had thought… I thought it might be nice.” The bettas had seemed so majestic in their tanks, iridiscent monarchs of false grass and plastic coves, and Yue Qingyuan had thought, wildly, that one might be rewarding to keep, might breathe a touch of life into his immaculately sleek living room. The whole affair hadn’t even been expensive by his shiny new standards, forget difficult to physically arrange. It was only when installation and set-up for his new aquarium had finished and he was left to watch that jewel-bright being swim disaffectedly through its new home that doubt had seized him, all-consuming and black. He had, admittedly, panicked a little after that.

(Yue Qingyuan’s apartment is very large, and very clean, and very empty. It holds the barest amount of decoration and muss to qualify as lived-in rather than a snapshot from a magazine ad. The fish may, in fact, be the only thing in the entire place which really qualifies as his. No wonder Yue Qingyuan wanted to jettison it from his life as soon as he got it.)

Mu Qingfang’s expression hovers between concern and simple confusion. “I’m sure Yue-xiong will be a more than adequate caretaker,” he says, more gently than Yue Qingyuan and all his neuroses probably deserve. “What’s this really about, Yue-xiong?”

Ah. There it is. Being the mildest person of Yue Qingyuan’s admittedly sharp-tongued social circle doesn’t preclude Mu Qingfang’s wit from being as keen as the scalpels he works with.

“I don’t…” Yue Qingyuan falters. How to express to Mu Qingfang how manifestly unfit Yue Qingyuan is to care for any living creature at all? He changes tack. “I think he hates me,” he admits dolefully.

Mu Qingfang stares at him for a long time, long enough to imply that he’s reevaluating certain opinions about Yue Qingyuan’s intelligence. “Yue-xiong, with all due respect to your new pet—it’s a fish.”

“Fish have emotions!” Yue Qingyuan argues. He flushes at the volume at which it comes out, and at the way Mu Qingfang’s eyes go wide-eyed in startlement. But the salesperson had been very insistent about that, as well. “Bettas are intelligent animals. They dislike certain colors, apparently, and they’re very sensitive—ah, to environmental disruptions, that is. And—”

Mu Qingfang’s eyebrows are still high, but his face has relaxed into a smile. “It sounds to me like you like it quite a bit already. Isn’t that reason enough to keep it?” His tone curls with sudden mischief. “Have heart, Yue-xiong—you’ve hardly known each other for a day! Give it time to adjust to you, and I’m sure you’ll win it over as surely as you do everyone else.” And he grins, sure and easy in his trust that Yue Qingyuan won’t fumble and shatter something so small and monumental as a life that he could cup in his palms.

While Yue Qingyuan is still dazed by that, Mu Qingfang’s eyes alight with interest. “Ah, Yue-xiong—what have you named it?”

“...”

Mu Qingfang’s face falls as devastatingly as it had lit up. “Yue-xiong…”

“Mu-xiong is aware that I was unsure of whether or not I’d keep him!” Yue Qingyuan is terribly aware that his ears are now heating up to match his cheeks. Mu Qingfang’s ensuing laughter does not help with that matter.

Yue Qingyuan is not very good at holding onto things. More often than not, he makes a mess of whatever he’s set his clumsy hands to, lets it fall right through his scarred fingers. But Mu Qingfang’s words ring through his head: Isn’t that reason enough to keep it? And, well, isn’t it? Surely Yue Qingyuan is adult enough to follow through on this. Maybe happiness can be look like his new betta swimming up to the tank to observe the new colorful form moving in front of it, can come as easy as Mu Qingfang quipping that his knowledge about fish is clearly lacking and vowing casually to read up on bettas to be a better fish uncle.

Yue Qingyuan buries a smile and walks over to let Mu Qingfang know that bettas can be trained to follow fingers around. The betta’s clear preference for Mu Qingfang over Yue Qingyuan is as good a marker of intelligence as any fun fact the pet shop worker could have given him. Yes, Yue Qingyuan thinks with a smile—he thinks he’ll be keeping this after all.

[marcsnuffy]

as the tumblr's resident snuffy expert I have to ask you what you think snuffy and lorenzo's actual legal relationship is (like did he take on the role of his guardian or is he technically more of a sponsor) and furthermore what you think their dynamic is like behind the scenes. like even if you accept the idea that snuffy is more of a father figure to lorenzo than an employer there's no way that this guy who was a homeless orphan until he was a teenager and the man who took him in *on the basis that he be athletically successful* have like. a normal unremarkable parent-child dynamic

Thanks for the question, sorry about the yapping

I'm torn on how to answer the legal relationship question. To me, it depends on how old you think Lorenzo is during the flashback. I always thought he was around 15-16, so I rarely consider an option where Snuffy isn't his legal guardian. However I could see some PIFA fuckery involved to avoid any legal trouble in the case he didn't have a legal guardian involved before becoming an adult legally.

Even then the process for getting gold teeth takes more than one day (all the visits you need to get your teeth properly checked for the procedure, the healing process takes months and more visits, etc) and he was near death so I'd like to think he was taken care/supervised of by Snuffy during that time (which is why Lorenzo's so attached to him). (the amount of care is up to interpretation bc it's hc territory anyway)

After that, when Lorenzo started playing football, *then* it's more of a sponsor/employer/advisor?/mentor? situation that occasionally bleeds into guardian-adopteé territory but never completely. I think they had something similar to how Ray Dark ended up dropping Kaiser at the BM dorms, except I think Snuffy directly had a hand in training/teaching Lorenzo before and still kept somewhat in contact during. I also like to think he got him a tutor or something, but this is more so I can sleep well at night. Snuffy IS the "what will you do when football's no longer an option" guy anyway so it's not unrealistic.

I need to add somewhere in this post that I believe/know in my heart that Snuffy picking up Lorenzo happened a bit after Mick died (months, maybe a year max) and specifically because of it. Comparing dead Mick & almost dying Lorenzo was super common when ch. 229 came out so I won't elaborate much on it, I just wanted to mention it.

Dynamics wise... There's too much going on for them to be in a normal boss and employee situation, Snuffy isn't fazed by Lorenzo's antics at all, Lorenzo goes up to Barou* to convince him to succeed Snuffy while also bringing up Snuffy's promise to Mick and also just everything about Lorenzo's reaction to Snuffy going back on his retirement, he literally told Barou he loved him & offered him a gold tooth. I don't think he says that to anyone yknow

*and by the way this interaction always stands out to me, since the timeline of events is not clear at all. all bc the fucking blue lock building is built like a prison and idk what time it is. I think Snuffy&Barou´s conversation happened at least some hours or a day after the Ubers introduction bit. During Lorenzo's backstory dump they're wearing pajamas but then Snuffy tells them it's time to train, so I assume it's the morning after that. Anyway I wonder if Snuffy just told him about it or if he directly asked him to talk to Barou. I feel like it's the former (given their reactions to Barou accepting Snuffy's deal) but the setup kinda makes it feel like the latter. whatever it was I think it's evidence for me to say that Snuffy trusts Lorenzo.

And I feel like there's nothing direct I can point to to say they're close enough to have a regular parent and child relationship. Still I feel like just by having Lorenzo be a NG11 and the fact that he enjoys football and doesn't scream cry and throw up when he loses or when he is inconvenienced (THE BAR IS ON HELL) makes me think Snuffy is mostly a positive influence on him. I like to think Snuffy does care a lot about him but he's the type of guy that shows it by meddling (kinda like Reo or younger Sae (who wasn't much of a meddler iirc. this makes sense in my mind)) and just isn't that visibly affectionate with anyone anymore.

More about the father and son thing. This is also headcanon territory I'm sorry. I don't think they, like, go out fishing as a bonding thing or anything like that. but I do think they don't go a week w/out talking bc I think Snuffy's a bit neurotic about how the people he cares about are doing because of reasons and Lorenzo loves talking people's ears off about everything and nothing. I think Lorenzo tried giving him an expensive gift with one of his first paychecks and mentioned "paying back his debt bit by bit" as a joke that wasn't really a joke and Snuffy's face twisted & he said something along the lines of Lorenzo not owing him anything and it was awkward between them for a while after that. I think its fucking WEIRD but they care abt each other and that's what matters

TL;DR: I think there had to be a point where Snuffy was his legal guardian or at least acted like it to some degree. In regards to their dynamic behind the scenes, that is not a father that is a grieving tutor-guardian-mentor-advisor-employer-professional football player and his renowned domesticated possum employee/adopteé who is soooooooo normal about worth.

[chiimeramanticore]

[deduction-substitute]

I have this other weirdly specific au again...so obviously its not very canon compliant

Lucky, because of Graveyard Girl, is able to see ghosts.

Some have been there the whole time, while others appear when a new survivor/hunter arrives. They look the same as the day they died, but still age "mentally"

Those who have kept Lucky company since the start of his stay include Miles, Michiko's husband, Sam Bourbon, and for some reason, Nathaniel Norwell, whose cause of death is unknown to everyone but himself

Three more ghosts appeared. Vera, Claude, and Ella arrived at the manor the same time their sibling did, which gave Lucky some insight to the survivor/hunter

Its weird seeing them just. Lounging around without no one noticing them at all. Even more disconcerting if its one of the twins; Lucky's had to stop himself from calling out to Ithaqua with the name "Nathaniel" more than once. He doesnt want to know what would happen to him if he did

Theyre a weird found family that should've never been founded in the first place. Sam loves teasing the others like theyre his younger siblings, Nathaniel's a prick, Vera loves to comment on every single thing, and Claude and Ella won't stop squabbling with each other (or ganging up on Nathaniel). Miles is the only normal guy here and Lucky is so grateful that he's sane enough to deal with everyone else's bullshit

Lucky gets used to every new addition, and he likes to think that he's getting a hang of the whole ghosts thing

And then the novelist arrives at the manor. With a ghost that wears the same face.