#a man who is 6'2" by the way

[rafesgfs]

Strauss asking reader into her office to talk about the tiktoks reader made about Hotch? 🤭

You haven't even greeted the team before Strauss sends you an email, asking you to meet her in her office as soon as you get in. You can't help but feel annoyed at the message, dropping your stuff off in a huff on your desk.

When you knock on her opened door, you see Aaron sitting in one of the chairs across from her, eyebrows raised when he sees you enter. "You wanted to see me?"

Strauss nodded, gesturing to you to come inside. As you shut the door behind you, she continued. "I wanted to talk to you and Agent Hotchner about a few videos you posted that are questionable."

Immediately you know what she's talking about. Glancing at Aaron with fear in your eyes, you saw his lips twitching, fighting back a smile. You don't know whether to be embarrassed and mortified or annoyed he isn't as worried as you.

Clearing your throat, you turned back to your boss's boss, slowly sitting down in the chair next to Aaron. "What videos?"

You see Aaron cover his lips with his hand when Strauss pulls out her laptop, a video you made from your TikTok account on the screen. Without a single word, she hits play and Umbrella fills the office as you lip sync to it with Aaron in the background looking up after a second and a smile forming on his face.

In the caption you've written, "When he's a 6'2", 45-year-old criminal profiler in a suit and tie." while lip-syncing the "Come into me" part of Rihanna's song. When the video ends, you look over at Aaron and see he's expressionless. You start to panic.

"Oh ... That one. I see." you said, inwardly slapping yourself for the answer. Strauss

raised an eyebrow. "What about it?"

"There's more," Strauss replied, ignoring your question as she clicks on another video.

You can't help but cringe as the sound plays very loudly. When the video finishes, she raises an eyebrow. "Now what did you mean when you said 'catch me on that dick tryna ride like a rodeo' with a picture of Agent Hotchner?”

You can't help the awkward laugh that escapes you because despite not knowing if you're in trouble or not, Strauss saying dick made you giggle. "Technically, I didn't say it. It was the song."

"You wrote it in the caption, didn't you?"

“. .. Yeah."

Silence fills the room and before you can ask, she pulls up a video of you filming

Aaron-who was well aware of the video, by the way, with the caption "Him in a beard >>" and the sound of dogs barking as the audio. You hear a nearly inaudible laugh from the man sitting next to you but you don't dare look.

Strauss clicks on another TikTok, but instead of a video, it was photos in a slideshow. You had to bite your tongue when the "Get destroyed or get destroyed" caption showed up along with a picture of Aaron with his tie undone. This was truly the weirdest, most embarrassing, and funniest shit you've gotten in trouble for.

When Strauss doesn't continue showing you videos you made about how hot your boss is—there's so much more, so much that someone might think you're dating—you meet her eyes and give her an apologizing look. "I'm sorry, I didn't know this was against policy."

"It's not," Aaron answers, speaking for the first time since you entered the room. "What did you want to talk to us about, Erin?"

She sighed, closing her laptop. "Aaron, I've told you before, there's no reason to hide this relationship. It's better to tell me what's going on other than have someone else find out and have another sexual harassment meeting again."

"Oh, he and I aren't—" you start to say, gesturing between you and Aaron.

"No, but you'd like to be." Strauss cuts you off, eyes narrowing at Aaron. “There's no policy against coworkers dating but there are rules if you start dating your subordinate."

Aaron nods, glancing briefly at you before speaking. "And what are those rules?"

"You must BCC your emails to each other to someone in HR, and complete the sexual harassment training segment again," she responded.

"Alright," Aaron replies, nodding once again.

You're dumbfounded when she dismisses the both of you, eyes flickering back to Aaron as you walk out of her office. Once you're back at your desk, you turned to him. "Well that was embarrassing.

He snorted. "Not as embarrassing as Bob from HR will be when he reads our emails."

You blinked. "What?"

Aaron smiled, slowly backing up from your desk as he made his way to his office. "We'll have to BCC him in our chats, honey."

[seliasvault]

this popped up into my brain and i decided to write it instead of my paper due on monday

nsfw below, mdni

gym!ghost x reader

tw: pervy simon, mentions of stalking

It was the new year, meaning the collective motivation to be better than the year before was flowing through everyone, including you. The past year had been a whirlwind, and so celebrating the new year felt right.

Like most, you decided this would be the year you focused on yourself, that 3 am motivation to change your life coursed through your veins and so you impulsively bought a gym membership.

You had joined the gym once, trying it out for a couple of days then shying away, all the different equipment required far too much learning and you simply didn't have the time. But this year you felt motivated enough that you would try.

And so on the first day, your membership was activated you made your way over to the local gym, dressed in the new sportswear you had bought the weekend prior.

Parking your car you walk in, a small bag in hand, still unsure what you're supposed to bring to the gym, so you settled with a water bottle and a change of clothes.

At the front desk, you're greeted by a man in his late 40s, he went over the basics, where everything was, how to get in if there was no staff, and the basic rules.

After your introduction you headed to the lockers, securing your bag inside, you popped your earbuds in, the playlist you made especially for today filled your ears, and you headed straight for the treadmill.

Sure it's stereotypical for a first-time gym goer to only use the treadmill, but you just needed to get a lay of the land and so what if that's the only thing you did while you were there, who really was looking?

Simon joined this gym a few months ago, after getting stir-crazy in his small flat, he thought what better way to spend his leave than working out?

With nothing to do, during every leave, he would come to the gym, spend 2-4 hours doing whatever he felt kept his body sharp, then he’d head home, eat, sleep, and repeat. It was a grim cycle, only interrupted by Soap's persistent invites to local pubs and deployment. That was until he saw you.

A normal Tuesday for him, he had been in for roughly an hour when you walked in, it was a small local gym so they rarely got newcomers however because of the new year it was to be expected. He paid no mind, not even a glance at whoever had walked in, and went back to whatever workout he found himself doing.

That however didn't last long, mid lift his eyes caught sight of the shy little thing on the treadmill. One of the only women occupying the space. You were dressed in basic workout clothes but he'd never seen them look better on anyone. He could tell you were shy, unsure of your surroundings by the way your eyes darted around the room, taking in every machine, each person.

You were trying to acclimate yourself and wasn't that cute. A slight smile played on his lips but he didn't let it last long, going back to finishing his set.

He continued his workout, observing you at every chance he got, and by the end of the hour it looked like you had enough and were headed to leave. He watched you wipe the sweat off your forehead with the back of your hand, his mind thinking about you wiping your mouth the same way after he'd filled it.

He mindlessly shot up to follow you.

After an hour on the treadmill, you decide that was more than enough for one day, especially your first day. And so you wiped at any sweat gathering on your forehead and headed to the locker room.

The gym had showers but you weren't too comfortable using them just yet. Though this gym was uncrowded, it consisted of mainly men and you were unsure how you felt about that.

You open the locker, get your stuff, and close it, only to be startled by a man you hadn't heard come in.

"Sorry! Didn't hear you come in." tensing immediately, you nervously laugh. He was at least 6'2 maybe 6'3, towering above you.

"S'alright didn't mean to startle ya'" His reply was smooth, voice deep. "It's no problem." You give him a smile, standing awkwardly, unsure of where this interaction was going.

After what felt like a couple of awkward minutes, he talks again.

"Just wanted to introduce myself, Simon Riley, saw your new 'ere and thought having a friend might help." He gave you a soft smile, one that seemed genuine, not like the countless creepy ones you've received during your short time here, and so you relax, just a bit, thanking god that he wasn't fully a creep

"Oh thank you! that's really nice of you, it'd be nice to have a familiar face."

"Since you're new, how about next time you’re in I'll show ya' around, show you the basics, help ya' out? Couldn't help but notice you stuck to the one machine, nothin' wrong with that just might be better to see what else is there yeah?"

Your cheeks heat just a bit, you hadn't clocked anyone staring at you, but then again you hadn't noticed him when you initially surveyed the area. You were still weary but the offer sounded good enough, nothing too bad.

"Uh-yeah sure! That sounds great actually, thank you, Simon."

"S'no problem, see ya' next time." He doesn't so glance back, abruptly leaving. You wondered how he would know when you'd be in next, considering this gym operated on a different days for everyone basis. But you shoved that aside, he probably had one of the fancy passes that allowed him in whenever, and based on his body, it's safe to say he was here often.

With the interaction over you push the slight heat creeping up on you down, leaving to head home for a hot shower.

Simon couldn't have imagined that going any better, he didn't quite realize what he was doing till it was done.

The moment you opened your mouth he swore he hardened right there and then, the sweetest voice he'd heard. He knew he intimidated you, saw the way you were weary, a couple of his best-mastered smiles and he had you relaxing into his grip.

Who else was going to protect you against the number of creeps that littered the gym?

And the way you said his name? He couldn't let you go after that.

If he broke into the gym computer to find your billing address, what days you come in, and your number, who's to know? And if he finds out everything else he can about you, like your name, birthday, social media, and access to the cameras he's discovered outside your house, really it's just a matter of getting to know you.

And so what if after a couple of weeks of coming to the gym, the panties you bring with you start going missing?

Simon's bleak life's been given a mission, that mission being to make you his.

[mrs-fatu]

Blossom in Summer

Chapter 1: Why me?

Paring: jey uso x Jasmine (fem!reader)

Warnings: Language, anger, confusion

WC: 2,824

Summary: Jasmine wakes up in an unfamiliar bedroom with no memory of last night. Who is this man? And why did he pick her?

As I slowly opened my eyes, the morning sun cast a warm glow across the lavish bedroom, bathing me in a soft, golden light. The silk curtains, adorned with intricate patterns, seemed to dance in the gentle breeze, and the sweet scent of dior Sauvage wafted through the air, filling my senses. But as I sat up, my head began to pound, and I was hit with a wave of confusion. Where was I? This wasn't my bedroom. The silk sheets tangled around my bare legs felt luxurious, but I couldn't shake the feeling that I was a stranger in this unfamiliar surrounding.

I forced my eyes open again, taking in the room around me with a sense of disorientation. The walls were a deep, rich blue, accentuated by traditional lavalavas hanging in beautifully crafted frames. To my left stood an antique black armoire, its intricate carvings telling a story of elegance and sophistication. The plush blue rug beneath the massive four-poster bed seemed to have been imported from a far-off land, and I felt like I was sleeping on a cloud.

As I sat up, holding my throbbing head in my hands, memories of the previous night began to trickle back. The fancy cocktail bar with my friends, doing shot after shot of tequila until the night blurred into a haze. Stumbling into a swanky hotel suite afterward, though I couldn't remember exactly how I'd gotten there. Who did this room belong to? And where had they gone? The questions swirled in my mind like a whirlpool, pulling me under.

I swung my legs over the side of the bed and stood up on shaky feet, clutching the bedpost for support. My head felt like it was going to split open, and I needed to figure out what happened and get out of here. As I looked down at myself, I saw that I was still wearing the silky black dress from last night, now wrinkled and creased. It was then that I noticed something heavy on my left wrist - a tennis bracelet so bright it almost blinded me. What was it doing there?

Just as I was trying to make sense of the strange circumstances, the door on the side of the room swung open, and a tall figure emerged. He stood at 6'2", his chiseled physique on full display as he walked towards me. His ebony shorts clung to his toned thighs and waist, accentuating his inked legs and tribal tattoos that glistened against his damp skin.

His hair was styled in a seductive mullet, and his lips sported a perfect shade of color, revealing his dazzling grillz as he parted them. It was like he had stepped out of a steamy romance novel, and I felt like I was staring at a character come to life.

"Morning," he spoke, his deep voice low and husky.

I stood there in shock, unable to form words. He walked around me, opening a drawer from his dresser to pull out his clothes. My eyes followed him, mesmerized by the way his muscles flexed as he moved.

"I'm sorry, who...?" I stuttered before I could finish.

But before I could even get the words out, my stomach began to churn and I felt like I was going to vomit. I stumbled backward, but it was too late. The morning sickness washed over me, and I threw up right on the floor.

He darted towards me, concern etched on his face. "Shit, you good?" he asked as he brushed away a dangling curl from my face.

"I'm sorry...I'm..." I spoke, feeling tears pricking at the corners of my eyes.

But before I could finish speaking, he ushered me towards his bed and sat me down on the edge. "Sit down," he said softly.

As he left the room, leaving me alone with my thoughts and emotions, I felt like my world was spinning out of control.

I just wanted to go home, to crawl back into my own bed and forget the reckless night I had just endured. But instead, I found myself in a luxurious bedroom, surrounded by the opulent trappings of a life that was not my own. A diamond tennis bracelet glinted on my wrist, a constant reminder of my foolishness. How could I have been so irresponsible, drinking so much that I ended up in this strange and unfamiliar place?

As I sat on the bed, trying to gather my thoughts, my phone began to ring. I picked it up from the nightstand, hoping for some semblance of normalcy in this chaotic situation. "Hello?" I spoke, trying to keep my voice steady.

"Girl, where the hell are you?" asked my best friend Natasha, her voice laced with concern.

"I...I don't even know," I replied, trying to gather my thoughts. "I'm with a man, and...and I threw up on his carpet, so..."

Natasha's laughter came through the phone, followed by a gasp. "Wait, is he sexy?" she asked, her tone playful.

"Um, well...he looks like he's from some kind of Pacific Island or something," I replied. "He has all these tribal tattoos and lavalavas on his wall."

Natasha's squeal of excitement was music to my ears. "Don't stop there, bitch! Tell me more! How does he look?"

I took a deep breath before launching into a detailed description of the mans handsome features. "Well, he has a short-cut mullet, and he's kinda muscular. His thighs are thick...and he has bottom grillz...and his voice is low and smooth."

Natasha's reaction was immediate. "Oh my god, Jas! You're in trouble!"

I glanced up to see him standing in the doorway, his expression unreadable. "Shit, I gotta go," I said hastily. "he's back."

"Okay, girl, let me know if you need me to pick you up," Natasha said, her voice dripping with concern. "I love you, be safe Jaz."

The line went dead as Natasha hung up, leaving me alone with him once more. I felt a sense of trepidation wash over me as he walked towards me, his eyes fixed on mine with an intensity that made my heart skip a beat.

-

As I stood up from the bed, I felt a sense of unease wash over me. He had just finished cleaning up the spot where I had vomited, and now his eyes were locked onto mine with an intensity that made my heart skip a beat. I felt a flush rise to my cheeks as I met his gaze, my mind still foggy from the previous night's excesses.

"I'm really sorry...I need to leave," I said, trying to sound apologetic as I began to step into my shoes.

His eyes darted as he stood up, his expression unreadable. "You just gonna forget about last night?" he asked, his tone laced with accusation.

I hesitated, searching for the right words to say. The truth was, I didn't remember what happened last night. It was all a blur of music, laughter, and tequila shots. But I knew that I couldn't keep it up forever, not when I had no idea what had happened or who this man was.

"I don't..." I paused, feeling a sense of embarrassment wash over me.

The man let out a huff, his expression turning annoyed. "Damn, you don't even remember," he said, his voice dripping with disappointment.

"I am very sorry," I said, trying to apologize once again. "And...the bracelet. You can have it back, I'm sorry."

I started to unhook the bracelet, feeling a sense of relief wash over me as I handed it back to him. But instead of taking it from me, he spoke up again.

"Just keep the bracelet, Jaz. I don't want it back. If you want to leave then go, the door is over there," he said, his tone hostile.

I was taken aback by his words. "I'm sure you spent hella on it," I said, trying to reason with him. "I don't want to..."

But he cut me off again. "Bruh, keep it, Jaz. I gave it to you for a reason."

His words were laced with aggression, and I felt a shiver run down my spine as I realized that he was genuinely upset with me. But why? What had happened last night?

As I stood there, feeling a sense of unease wash over me once again, he spoke up again.

"And I bet you don't even remember my name huh?" he asked, his tone dripping with disdain.

I lightly shook my head, feeling a sense of shame wash over me. How could I have forgotten someone's name?

He sucked his teeth in disgust before speaking up again. "It's Joshua, Jey Uso," he said agitatedly. The name sounded slightly familiar but not quite.

With that, I grabbed my purse and made my way towards the door. As I left the room, I couldn't help but feel a sense of relief wash over me. I had no idea what had happened last night or who Jey was or why he was so upset with me. All I knew was that I needed to get out of there before things got any worse.

-

I stood on the sidewalk of the penthouse, my head still throbbing with a dull ache. The morning sunlight was harsh, and I winced as I squinted up at the towering skyscrapers. I pulled out my phone and dialed the familiar number, hoping that my friend Tiffany would be able to come and rescue me from this situation.

As I waited for her to answer, I took a deep breath and tried to clear the fog from my mind. What had happened last night? Who was Jey Uso, and why did he seem so angry with me? And why, for that matter, had he let me keep the diamond tennis bracelet? It didn't make any sense.

The phone rang again, and Tiffany's cheerful voice answered. "Hey, what's up?"

I took a deep breath before speaking. "Hey, can you come get me? I'll send you the address."

Tiffany's voice turned serious. "Yeah, I'll see you soon. Be careful."

The line went dead, and I was left standing alone on the sidewalk, feeling like I was in a fog. Who was Jey Uso, and why had I ended up in his penthouse apartment? What had happened last night, and why did I have such a pounding headache?

-

As I stood there, trying to make sense of it all, my thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a car approaching approaching. It was Tiffany, looking stylish and put-together as always in her benz.

"Hey, girl, get in" she said, concern etched on her face. i stepped into her car and took a deep breath, "What happened?"

I shook my head, feeling a sense of relief wash over me as I handed her the keys. "I don't know," I said. "I don't remember anything from last night."

Tiffany's eyes widened in surprise. "What do you mean?"

I shrugged. "I don't know who Jey Uso is or what happened. But I need some coffee and some crackers. Like, right now."

i rubbed my temples in an attempt to alleviate the throbbing headache, my friend Tiffany's eyes lit up like a bright light bulb. "JEY USO?" she yelled in question, her voice piercing the morning air.

I winced, feeling a wave of pain wash over me. "Goddamn girl, my head," I groaned, trying to hold onto my sanity.

Tiffany's eyes sparkled with excitement. "I'm sorry, but you said his name is Jey Uso, right?" she asked, her voice filled with curiosity.

I nodded my head, feeling a sense of resignation wash over me. "Yeah, why? Then he let me keep this bracelet," I said, holding up my wrist to show her the diamond tennis bracelet.

Tiffany's reaction was immediate. She squealed like a little child, her eyes wide with excitement. "YOU STAYED WITH JEY USO AND HE GAVE YOU A TENNIS BRACELET?" she repeated, her voice rising to a near-shriek.

I palmed my face, feeling a sense of embarrassment wash over me. "My head. Please stop screaming," I begged.

Tiffany's laughter died down, and she looked at me with a mixture of amusement and concern. "Oh, girl, I'm sorry. Jey Uso is the WWE wrestler, and he's fine as hell!" she exclaimed.

I gave her a skeptical look, feeling a sense of unease. "What? Come on, you can't tell me he's not sexy. He's main event Jey Uso. And God, the way he flicks his tongue... We have to go to the supershow tonight, you gotta see him in the ring," she said.

I raised an eyebrow, feeling a sense of trepidation. "I mean, he's okay, but he was kinda rude. If going to the show will make you happy then sure. But I really need some fucking coffee," I said.

Tiffany rolled her eyes. "Fine, we'll get you coffee and then get ready for the show," she said before driving off into the morning traffic.

I couldn't help but feel a sense of confusion. Who was Jey Uso, and why did he seem so angry with me? And what had happened last night? The questions swirled in my mind like a whirlpool, refusing to be silenced.

But for now, all I could think about was getting home and getting some coffee into my system. Maybe then things would start to make sense again.

—

I knew that having a hangover wasn't the best, but coffee always seemed to come in handy.

I reached for my trusty brush and gel, and began to work my hair into a sleek, curly ponytail. The hard bristles of the brush glided effortlessly through my locks, leaving them smooth and tamed. I then moved on to my eyebrows, using a precision brow pencil to reshape them into a thin, arching shape that I preferred. The gentle strokes of the pencil seemed to calm my frazzled nerves, and I felt a sense of clarity wash over me.

With my brows in order, I turned my attention to my makeup. I carefully applied a light foundation to even out my complexion, followed by a subtle blush to give my cheeks a healthy glow. A swipe of mascara added depth and drama to my lashes, and a swipe of lip balm left my lips feeling soft and hydrated.

As I finished up my makeup routine, I stood up and surveyed my reflection. I was pleased with the results - my hair looked luscious and bouncy, and my makeup was understated yet effective. I then gathered my clothes, selecting a nice outfit that would see me through the day.

As I dressed, I couldn't help but feel a sense of gratitude for the simple pleasures in life - a hot shower, a good cup of coffee, and a fresh start. The night moonlight streaming through the window seemed to hold promise, and I felt a sense of renewed energy coursing through my veins.

I took one last look at myself in the mirror, smoothing out any wrinkles or creases in my outfit. Satisfied with the result, I headed out into the night, ready to face whatever happens.

-

As I emerged from the hotel, I was greeted by the warm night and the sound of Tiffany's horn blaring in the distance. I rushed towards the car, my mind still foggy from the lingering effects of the night before. As I slipped into the passenger seat, Tiffany flashed me a bright smile. "You look good, girl!" she exclaimed.

I smiled back, feeling a sense of gratitude for her kind words. "Thanks, you look good too," I replied, taking in her stylish outfit.

As we hit the road, Tiffany began to drive, her eyes fixed on the windshield. "Okay, so remember, we're going to see Jey tonight. I got us front row tickets, so at least cheer when he comes out, because I definitely will," she said, her voice filled with excitement.

I raised an eyebrow, feeling a sense of confusion wash over me. What was up with this man? Why did women like Tiffany drool over him so much? I mean, I got it - he was hot as hell - but I didn't understand all the hype. The traffic lights seemed to be flashing in sync with the diamond bracelet on my wrist, and all I could think about was why me? What had happened? Would it all come back to me?

As we navigated through the crowded streets of Las Vegas, my mind began to wander back to the night before. The anger in Jey's eyes as I told him I didn't remember anything was still etched in my memory. It was enough to keep me away from him, to make me realize that I didn't need another angry man in my life. Not again.

After dealing with Aaron, I had promised myself that I wouldn't dare let another angry man into my life again. And now, as I sat in the car with Tiffany, I knew that I had to keep my distance from Jey Uso. Maybe after the show, I could find him and give him the bracelet back - never look back. It would be for my own good.

As we pulled up to the venue, I took a deep breath and let my thoughts settle. I had five days left in Vegas, and I was determined to make the most of it. No more worrying about waking up in a random man's bed. No more drama or stress. Just me, myself, and a fresh start.

[adh-james-version]

explicit sexual content

⚠️trans reg⚠️

"But that's the fifth time 3 days!" Regulus' said exasperated. Another "fan" tried to for real grab him again. Regulus' though being a world known musical artist would be fun until people started mobbing him. Actually mobbing him. He was sitting in his 3 bed room Penthouse with his brother sitting on the edge of his bead "I'm sorry Little Star. But to make things better I got you a bodyguard? Especially since I don't live with you anymore you need someone around. His name is James, James Potter and h-" Woah. Full stop, pause, rewind. "James Potter? As in your best friend who was a bumbling jock who had an IQ of 12. How in the living fuck is he gonna save me from anything."

"Don't be so quick to judge, Regulus. James was actually very smart and he was in the military and is trained in multiple forms of martial arts. And trust me, you know how you thought he was attractive in highschool?" Regulus' just rolled his eyes. "You just might pass out, Regulus' and I'm being so serious. More Sirius than my name." Regulus rolled his eyes again. After he was done laughing he added. "He's gonna stay here with you by the way, in the spare bedroom. Regulus had the sudden (very common) urge to slap his brother in the face.

"You know what?" Regulus started deciding to take the high road for the first time in his life, "Just tell me when he's gonna get here; so I can set up the spare room." "Funny thing is he's gonna get here at 5pm...today..." "SIRIUS WHAT THE FUCK?! That's in 30 minutes!?" "Sorry, Sorry. But after that girl grabbed you I wanted to get somebody here as soon as possible.

The elevator that was only used for his apartment went off indicating someone was here went off. "You already gave him the key to the elevator? What if I didn't like him?" Regulus said walking down the stairs with Sirius close behind him "Oh trust me you will." The elevator doors started to open. "I highly dou-" Woah.

A beautiful 6'2 god of a man with gorgeous dark brown eyes, muscles that have definitely increased since high school and unruly dark hair that Regulus itched to run his hand through, stepped into his penthouse with a small rolling suit case. "Jamie!" Sirius ran up to give his friend a hug. "Hey Siri!" He turned his attention to Regulus. "Hey Reggie! Long time no see!"

"Too long." Regulus said smirking and letting his eyes roam James shamelessly. When he made it back up to James' face he could see the blush already forming on his face. Sirius cleared his throat, exaggeratedly. "Anyways," he eyed them both suspiciously, "I'm going back to my house. Reg you basically get to order James around and that's kinda all." Sirius turned and left, probably sensing what was about to happen.

"So I get to order you around, huh?"

- - -

"Fuckkkkk~" Regulus back was arched high off of his bed as James ate him out like he had never eaten a  single things in his life. His tongue was swirling in all kinds way that had Regulus trying to push his head further  into his folds. As James kept devouring him, Regulus felt two fingers enter him, curling and rubbing as if James was trying to map his body.

A third finger was pushed in while James kept licking and sucking on his clit. His stomach began to tighten and his vision began to blur and the Regulus fell off the edge shaking with pleasure.

When he was finally able to form a thought outside of pleasure and or James he felt kisses on his neck and jaw. "Are you okay, love?" "Mhmm," Regulus hummed. "But you still need to cum." "No I don't, I'm fine, love." "No you need to. Use me." "No, it's okay Regulus." James pressed a kiss to Regulus' lips from when he was hovering over him with his hands next to Regulus' head. Regulus held James down deepening the kiss while running his hands through his hair. "I remember being told that I get to order you around." Regulus murmured against James' lips before kissing him once again, quicker this time, causing James to whine. "So I order you to fuck me so hard I can't think, and then I order you to cum inside me and keep fucking your cum inside of me until I forget my own name."

James whimpered, the words affecting him in all kinds of ways. Jame flipped Regulus over pushing his face into the mattress. "Okay I'll fuck you, baby. But remember, you maybe able to 'order me around' but," He thrusted in roughly, pushing Regulus' head down,

"I'm In Control."

James slowly pulled out of Regulus before thrusting in hard. The sound echoed across Regulus' entire room. "Feel good, love? Feel good to be treated like a slut? Like you have no choice?" James teased, still with the same slow and hard strokes.

"Maybe if you AC-tually fU~cked ME like one then maybe I WO-uld have and ansWEr." Regulus said breaking when James thrust in particularly hard. James pulled out completely, and grabbed Regulus and turned him over so he was facing up so James could see him. He had such a smug grinned that was wiped of his face as James wrapped his hand around Regulus' throat and tightly gripped it.

Leaning in close to Regulus so their lips would brush but Regulus couldn't reach up and kiss him, James said. "Regulus Arcturus Black, if you don't fix your attitude I will fuck you up."

"Well you'd actually have to fuck me for that to happen." Regulus rolled his eyes before they rolled back in his head as James chocked him harder than he'd ever experienced in his life. "You know what, that mouth is a problem, and I'm gonna fix it. Off the bed. On your knees." Regulus was quick to get off the bed, sitting in between James legs. "Suck."

Regulus got to work quickly, sucking on James' cock faster and deeper. "Look at that, you're so much better when you have my dick shoved down your throat." Regulus moaned and James' words and James smirked. James ran his hands through Regulus' hair before pulling it and holding him still while he started fucking his throat ruthlessly.

Regulus gagged and James dick but never once have a sign to stop. James started to feel himself unravel and he held Regulus down as he came deep down his throat. "Nghh- now, do you think you can handle being fucked without the snarky remarks?" Regulus just nodded looking up at James.

"C'mon then" Regulus got back up on the bed lying on his back. James lined himself up and then pushed in. "Ohh- fuckkk yes" Regulus said and James started fucking into him at a moderate pace. "Such a slut, I'm barely even fucking you." Regulus tried to reach up and grab James but he found his wrists pinned above his head in one of James hands, the other was around his neck. He felt simultaneously helpless and safe at the same time and he relished in it.

James sped up his strokes while keeping them just as hard, Regulus felt like he was choking on the man fucking  him. "Is this more what you wanted? Huh? This how you think a slut should be fucked?" James tightened his grip on Regulus' neck. "Yess, James. More please." 

"There we go,  that mouth has already gotten more polite." James said as he kept fucking the younger man ruthlessly. "Gonna c-" "I know baby." James moved then hand from Regulus' wrists to circle his clit causing Regulus to squirt all over him. James slowed to his movements, the thrusting, the grip on Reggies neck and the circling of  Regulus clit. Regulus was beet red. James leaned down and kissed Regulus lightly."You squirted for me baby? Hm? You ever done that before?" "N-no." He kissed him again, "Guess you have never been fucked well. Just know you're gonna be fucked well by me this time, next time, and every time after that." 

James resumed his fast strokes and pace, and Regulus was falling over  the edge of an even high cliff in no time. James came deep inside of Regulus and did just as he wanted him to do: he kept fucking his own cum inside him, making him feel every, single, thing. Regulus whined but made no effort to tell James to stop or push him off, "Mhm that's right love, take it, this is what you ordered me to do right?" Regulus lost himself completely, not comprehending anything past the pleasure he was receiving.

So in the end, Regulus did get to order him around, but James was 100% in control. 

[l1ttlelucy]

Lucemond high-school au!

Lucerys has always been pretty, and it shows with his popularity. Unfortunately, along with popularity comes love confessions, which Lucerys rejected quite regularly.

Aemond Targaryen– one of the 'nerds' of the school, short in stature as well as glasses (only 1 side had a lense, supposedly the other eye is fake) and only known throughout the school due to his older brother, Aegon Targaryen who throws some of the best parties, chooses the last day of this school year to ask Lucerys out.

Lucerys lets him down softly, apologizing as he's not looking to be in a relationship right now.

Aemond Targaryen seems dejected, but Lucerys is surprised when the boy puffs his chest and nods, confidentially saying

"Then I'll wait!"

And Lucerys heart coo's at the cute sight. It's highly unlikely that he'd date Aemond Targaryen (He wants to be held down and railed, okay 🙄) but Lucerys had to admit, the boy was adorable.

So he ruffles the white locks teasingly and agrees, not having the heart to let the boy down once again.

Summer break comes and goes, and Lucerys walks in with his curls longer than the previous year, a bright smile on his face, and ready to face another school year.

He stands at his locker, messing around before Rhaena knocks into the locker next to his, gasping for air and eyes wide, face flushed from exertion and something else.

"Holy shit, I just saw the hottest dude."

Lucerys huffs, rolls his eyes, and closes the locker, turning to face Rhaena head-on with a raised eyebrow.

"Why hello Rhaena. It's so nice to see you Rhaena. How was my break? It was refreshing, and much needed. Yours? Good? Great." Lucerys huffed, deadpanned as Rhaena's blush darkened, swatting at his arm.

"Sorry sorry, yes my break was good. Grandfather misses you, by the way."

He and Rhaena were cousins, her mother and his father were siblings. They'd grown up together, before the divorce of their parents split them up.

Lucerys smiled softly, he'd been meaning to visit Corlys, but the man was nearly always out at sea, whether that be on business or on his yacht, their availability never matched, and it had been many months since he'd seen his grandfather.

"Well, if you happen to see him again before me, be sure to tell him I miss him too."

Rhaena gave a nod, before returning to the main reason she had sprinted here.

"Okay, so, I was walking around showing a new kid to the office, poor thing got lost. On the way back, I heard a little commotion and when I looked over, I saw the Baratheon girls giggling and pointing at something. You know me and my curiosity, I had to investigate!"

Lucerys can agree. Rhaena had always been a curious thing, to the point Lucerys could never hide anything from her as she would figure it out somehow.

It helped with others, always being one of the first to know about rumors or secrets many hid.

"I walk over and, low and behold, the most gorgeous sight I've ever laid my eyes on. Some guy– he must be at least 6'2, he was huge. Jacked. Like pick me up with one arm and throw me over his shoulders jacked. I couldn't see much, as he had his back to me. But I didn't need much. Long white hair? Leather jacket over those broad shoulders? I was on the floor. A puddle. I was gonna die Luce, I was ready to risk it all right then and there!!"

The girl babbled, and Lucerys blinked, unsurprised. Rhaena always had a thing for guys that could throw her without even blinking (not that Lucerys didn't, but he was more silent on it).

"Well? Why didn't you? Nothing ever stopped you from admitting your attraction before."

Rhaena, many times before, had gone up to those she found attractive and admitted it to their face. If they rejected her, she'd shrug it off, an attempt was an attempt. And if they returned said feelings, then it was a win in her book.

"You see, I was. But Casandra beat me to it! She'd walked right up, confessed. And guess what he said!!!"

Rhaena's voice had raised considerably, heads turned in their direction but she paid them no attention.

Lucerys sent them apologetic glances.

"Apologies. But I am already taken."

Rhaena had deepened her voice considerably, a bad mock imitation of the stranger. She'd even raised her arms and puffed her chest to make her seem bigger. Lucerys slapped a hand over his mouth to muffle the laugh. She grinned goofly at him.

"Anyways. I'm not that desperate to steal a taken man. I am fine with standing back and ogling from afar." She sighed, shaking her head in fake dejection before raising it once again, grin slipping back onto her face.

Said grin soon dropped quickly as Rhaena's jaw dropped. Her eyes widened, blinking rapidly as her gaze flickered behind him. She looked like a fish out of water.

Curious, he turned around and came face to –chest? (It was a nice chest too, Lucerys resisted the urge to bury his face in it). He was stunned for a few moments, staring blankly before his eyes rose to meet lips pursed into a smirk, a single eye staring down in a way that dragged shivers along his spine.

This must have been the mysterious man.

Rhaena had not been wrong.

This man was one of the hottest people Lucerys had ever seen. Long, white locks were pulled back so half was tied into a bun, whilst the lower half was let free, cascading and framing sharp cheekbones and dropped over thick, broad shoulders.

An eyepatch was pressed over the left eye, while the right dragged itself down and back up Lucerys body as though he were an art piece framed in a museum. Lucerys felt like prey standing before a predator.

"Hi." Lucerys uttered, voice coming out high pitched and embarrassing.

Lucerys already wanted to bury himself in a hole.

"Hello." The taller man mused, and Lucerys too was ready to risk it all right then and there. The voice was not too deep, but deeper than his own and silky. In a way that made Lucerys wish to drop to his knees and pray (amongst other things).

"Lucerys!" He squeaked out, flushed and holding a hand out. The taller male looked surprised before it slid into amusement as he grasped Lucerys hand in his own– Lucerys nearly tumbled to the floor. The mysterious man's hand dwarfed his own, large and rough and Lucerys was going to see God. He would not survive this encounter. He felt like goo as he watched their size difference.

Lucerys had not ever been one to lose his composure so easily, especially for another. But something about this man ruined Lucerys for any other.

And then– unfortunately for both Lucerys heart and little friend– the stranger raised Lucerys hand and pressed a gentle kiss to his hand as though he were a maiden.

Had Rhaena not informed him that the man was taken, Lucerys would have jumped his bones right then and there.

A throat cleared itself behind him, and both Lucerys and the stranger turned to see Rhaena giving them a look. Lucerys blushed.

"I guess... I'll leave you both to it!"

And she scurried away like the traitor she was. He sighed internally, before his attention was brought back to the other male.

"It is great to see you again, Lucerys."

And all simping was paused, as Lucerys brows furrowed in confusion. Again? He was sure he would remember someone who looked like the gods had spent extra time crafting. He squinted as he once again took in the appearance of the other.

The only familiarity was the straight white hair, most commonly belonging to the Targaryens. Yet, the only ones he knew of were Aegon, Helaena, and Aemond. This man was most definitely none of them.

His confusion must have shown on his face as the taller laughed, husky and Lucerys gut heated up at the sound.

"Well, I guess I do look different from the last time we saw another. I cannot shame you for the confusion. Perhaps.. this shall remind you."

And the man stepped closer, fingers brushing along Lucerys cheek before dipping to grasp his chin, raising and tilting Lucerys head the slightest so the man could lean down, lips brushing against Lucerys ear.

"The last we spoke, I confessed my affection for you. It was unfortunate they were not shared, but I was not deterred. I was and still am willing to wait. So now I ask you, shall you make me wait longer?"

And Lucerys inhaled harshly, having not noticed he'd stopped breathing at their proximity and during the man– no, Aemonds words. Small, little Aemond who had doubled in both stature and build.

"A-Aemond?" And though he knew it was him– there was no other explanation. The only man who had said such a thing was the sweet little boy Lucerys had rejected. Lucerys just could not comprehend how the other man had grown so much, in such a little amount of time.

Lucerys could feel the way Aemonds lips quirked up against his ear, breath hot and ruffling his curls before Aemond leant back, eye eating Lucerys up.

"Good boy."

I love the thought that earlier that morning, Aemomd had stood before his mirror and spent hours on his appearance. Aegon definitely laid across the man's bed, exhausted as he was forced to wake up to give tips and recommendations to the outfit.

"With or without the eyepatch?" Aegon groans in reply.

[technician-para-driver]

Heya, there! Anji is here~

I was born in 1977 (as from 2004 then I'll be 27y.o), and my pronouns is she/they (but I conversationally prefer to be referred just by my name, Anji)

I am one of PPTH's Ambulance Operator (driver and paramedic). I also am an automotive technician and a part of Abhimanyu Automotive Garage and Warehouse for Automotive Service.

Feel free to interact with me and my family (Araya - twin brother, Abhi - older brother, Anjani - mother) on "Welcome to the Garage!" ; for emergency and automotive needs, or anything!^^

Also! I'm using this blog with my family (me and my family lore is here), so here's the blog guide:

Creator speaking: Hello! It's Rain @rainismdata , who has created these OCs. Feel free to interact with any of them! My other OC is Dr. Maddox @dr-visionary-counselor . I'll be glad to talk further with these character and developing the interactions with all House MD OCs of @ppth-staff and also obviously everyone. I'll be talking in indented and italic word!

Yeah. That's it from my creator. So, I'll use the reds. Now now, I'll let my family to introduce themselves.

This is the narrative speaking, in small chat. Anji lets us in to her family house, showing us pictures of her family, a couple parent and three children. And proceed to the kitchen room, looking at a man who's standing tall in about 6'2", cooking. She patted his shoulder and giving him signs.

1, 2, 3, check and recheck. Is anybody here?

Bro, are you serious?

Obviously not, actually. Sorry. HAHA.

Hi! Call me Araya! I am Anji's twin brother and currently a librarian in Princeton. I was also born in 1977, obviously (so I'll be 27 in 2004). But, hey... I'm moving out with my husband in 2013, and he's a chef!

So fitting with Araya's big appetite.

So, so, true! Feel free to ask or talk to me about books, or is there a copy of any book in Princeton Library. I'll be talking in greens, by the way... And, that's it from me~

I'll take it from here, then.

Another man who's 6' is approaching them and stealing a few bites of Araya's snack.

Good Morning! I am Abhimanyu; just call me Abhi or Abi for shorts. I am the twins' older brother, was born in 1975 (if it's 2004 then I'll be 29y.o).

I'm moving out to live with my wife and kids (yeah, I also have twins) near my Automotive Garage and Warehouse for automotive service; still in Princeton anyway... I'll be happy if Anji referred you to my Garage for automotive services. If you were referred by Anji or Araya, or even my mom, then you'll have a discount! I know... I shouldn't be giving discounts out. But— what do I say? Happy customer, happy me.

I'll be talking in blues. So, I'll see you when I see you!

We proceed to the dining room as Abi also joining us. Currently works as a knitting workshop where the threads are scattered nicely on the dining table. A woman in her 50s is knitting, putting on a glasses.

Mama?

Uh-hm...?

Mom— Oh my god. Sorry, fellas. I might need a second. She's focusing on making that temperature knitted blanket.

Mama... Please, introduce yourself. We are in an introduction here.

Oh! Hey! I'm sorry. I was so focusing on— Ah. Anyways...

Hello! I am the siblings' Mother. You can call me Anjani, or Anja, or Jani. Or just simply Auntie. I'll be fine either way. I'm an old soul, born in 1953 (I'll be 51 in 2004).

I currently am working on temperature knitted blanket. It's been fun and I have done 237 days! My children says my cookings is the best in the world. That's what kids says to their mom, wasn't it? They might've exaggerate that so much—

No, Mom.

We're not exaggerating that.

Araya heard his mom's word, too, from the kitchen, he's speaking loudly so that we could all hear him.

I have a chef husband, but that stays the right for me.

That's so nice of you! I might've going to broke the roof if you speak so nicely about me.

Aye aye. There you go, fellas. That's my Mama. Don't get surprised of who I got that from.

What should I say, I like foods. So, I'd like to rate your cookings; maybe not by taste because it's virtual. I'll be talking in— idk, is it pink? I guess it's pink.

Thanks, Mama. I'll leave you with this knitted blanket. I'll proceed further with this introduction.

We are now sitting on a couch in living room. A teapot is on the table and a cup of tea is served.

That's all from my family. I'll be using this blog as the main user. And now that you know, my family has bold sentence on their introduction to tell you their main interest. But the basic rule is still works; that we can basically talk about anything, even outside our interest.

That being said, SEE YOU!!^^

So, that's how it's done... This family is going to be LOUD loud. Please, bear with me ╥﹏╥

Also, I'm not an artist, so I use picrew for this.

[rubberducki20]

Background and descriptions:

World:Earth, a place with humans and demi humans, they don't usually exist peacefully but there are safe places and people.

Characters:

Jarek: 6'2, 25 year old Demi human, grouchy dickhead cat man, been in a gang since 14 (refuses to speak on it), tattooed and the peen is pierced (arm sleeves and a ladder piercing oh my)

Lavender (Kora): 5'1, 22 year old human, sweet but assertive, army drop out, her mother married a Demi human so she loves Demi humans, no tattoos or piercings, just scars

MDNI 🔞 NSFW 🔞

Here's a photo rep or Jarek

Kora's POV

I place the first aid kit in the table beside him, "shirt off, I gotta see how bad they are." I sit down in front of him, half expecting him to just leave, but he doesn't. He huffed and takes his shirt off showing toned and muscled chest and stomach, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I dabbed peroxide on a cotton ball and cleaned the wounds and blood up.

I wasn't expecting to have a 6 foot man in my house, I cringe at the blood he smeared on the couch. Oh well, at least it's old and leather. "Tsk, why the fuck did you drag me here human?" He asks, his cream colored black tipped tail flicks showing his annoyance. "Maybe because you were getting your ass kicked on my lawn. Humans are so selfish and racist. It's Kora by the way." I shout back from the bathroom, the poor man had blood soaking his shirt and face, he was definitely gonna have bruises that lasted more than a week. "Whatever bitch. What are you even doing anyways?" He quirks, wow this man was a fiesty one. "If your gonna call me a bitch at least pull my hair and spank me. What I'm gonna do is fix your wounds and put that shoulder back in place."

He took his shirt off, showing me that the wounds werent so bad as they looked. I cleaned the wound with peroxide and cotton balls. After that I put my hands on his shoulder, "this is gonna hurt, I'm sorry." I shove the socket back into the blade and all I get from him is a hiss of pain.

"So how do you want me to pay you back?" His question surprised me. I laughed at it, "Nothing, but if you need a place to stay you can, If you feel like you owe me then I'll just as for help moving big furniture or at my store." I get up and put the first aid kit back, "I'm not some pet for you to oggle human." His ears were to the side, and he didn't look to happy. "Who said you were a pet dumbass? You want to pay me back, then that's how. I only offer a room cause it's clear you don't have a place to go." I snap back, heading to the kichean to make dinner. I could feel him seething but he didn't answer me, but the chair squeaking on the floor did.

I made salmon and ramen with eggs, and slid a bowl with chopsticks in front of him. I sat down across from the man and began eating myself. "Can I at least know your name?" I questioned, "Jarek." was my only response.

After we both finish, I grab our dishes an wash them. "Let me show you the room you'll be staying in." I beckon him to follow and he does. I stop at the green door, open it and move out the way so he can come in. "You have a private bathroom, and tomorrow we'll go get you some new clothes." I turn towards my door that's 2 down, "if you need me just holler or knock." I walk into my room and and lea against the door. Eventually I hear his door close and my body relaxes.

I got ready for bed and tried to sleep. After a few hours of tossing and turning, I couldn't help it, I was turned on by Jarek, ofc I wasn't gonna tell him that. So, I grabbed my vib and toy to relax my ache. Hoping to God Jarek couldn't hear.

Jarek's POV

I didn't get why that little human was being friendly, it was weird..but she did cook really good and the room was nice, especially the bed.

Jarek was too high on alert to sleep, and it didn't help that with his hearing, he could hear little human being promiscuous. He felt himself stiffen, and sighed at himself, hating that he was turned on by it.

Eventually the little one stopped, more then likely finding the high she was chasing and it wore her out. Finally, Jarek was able to get some sleep. He'll deal with his raging cock later.

Morning ♡

Jarek woke to the smell of pancakes, he couldn't remember the last time he had them. He stalked to the kitchen, Jarek smelled the remnants of pleasure that stuck to his little human. He wanted to taste it, but refrained from it.

She was dressed in shorts and a sports bra, her hair wet, mustve taken a shower. "Smells good for a human cooking." Jarek sat in the seat he did last night and 3 pancakes were put in front of him. He wouldn't ever admit it, but she was amazing at cookin. "Well im glad you like it, I know a demi friendly store we can go to for some new clothes. Then we gotta go open up my store." She said to her food, she was nervous around him. He loved it.

"Yea yea, just don't be tryna say I'm your pet or sum shit." Jarek put his plate in the sink, and sat back down. "If anyone asks, your my roommate and new hire." She chirps, throwing a discarded shirt on an grabbed some keys. They both walked out of the house and got into her car. It was nice, solid black with dark green leather seats. Jarek adjusted the seat to his liking and their little journey began. "Ok, so here's my card, don't go too crazy but get what you need. Imma go do store owner duties and come back to pick you up." She pulls up to a store, the sign saying demi humans welcomed in all black. "Alright. See you later then." Jarek gets out the car and reaches in to get the card.

He watches the car drive off and he goes into the store.

Kora's POV

She liked this softer side of Jarek, definitely not the softest, but at least he wasn't calling her a bitch. She pulled up to her pride and joy, Lavender Layers, a bakery she's gained ownership of when her parents passed. She noticed two cars parked in the back, must be her two employees, Viva and Chancellor. As she got out at walked to the back of the door, she guide was right cause the two demi humans got out of their cars and joined her. "Hey boys! How yall. Ready to fill some orders to day?" Kora smiled, the two men agreeing. "Oh, we have a new hire, he's my roommate too, so don't be too hard on him..he's had a rough past."

The men hummed in acknowledgement, they didn't speak a lot either, I hired them the day they got out of prison. I had their backs and they had mine.

Kora let the men get to their daily duties and she went to order jarek a few store shirts and a cap that'd fit his cat ears. A knock on the office door startled her, and as it opened she was given a coffee. "Thank you Viva, your husband's coffee is the best." She took several sips enjoying the honey hazelnut coffee. With the clothes ordered, Kora went to the front to unlock the door, and to help finish baking her mothers favorite desserts.

A few customers human and demi alike to enjoy Sweets. The door opened and jarek stalked in. "Oh hey! You find everything you need?" She smiled, and went to the side to let him in the back of the store. "Yea I found it all. You didn't tell you owned Lavender. I loved this place as a kid." Jarek looked around, tail swishing with curiosity. "My mom and step dad owned this place, I got it once they passed. Here's our coworkers, Chancellor and Viva. They don't talk much but their great." She started showing Jarek everything that he'll start learning the next couple days while the boys took care of the line out front. "I also ordered you some shirts for the store and a cap. If I'm not around, the boys will be able to show you. And-" glass breaking stopped Kora mid sentence.

The pair went up front to see Viva helping a lady with two kids clean up a broken mug, the poor lady was apologizing profusely. "Ma'am it's perfectly okay, we all break things sometimes. Trust me we have more mugs." Viva says and goes back to remake her drink.

That's all I'm writing for today guys, works got me a Lil beat 😮‍💨😅 love yall! I hope I get to wrote more on these little love birds.

[quistal]

can you write a full 5 paragraph essay on your love for venat

ask and you shall receive LOL

Venat: Best Waifu **SPOILERS FOR 6.0** The question of who the best waifu is, is one that has set fans against each other since the dawn of fandom. The “great community by the way” of Square Enix’s critically acclaimed MMORPG (with an expanded free trial up to level 60 which includes the award winning Heavensward expansion) was no exception to this, with players all over the world unable to decide who is truly the best waifu of the game. That is, until the release of Endwalker in December of 2021 , which introduced the true best waifu Venat to our collective awareness. With the trifecta of perfect looks, perfect personality, and perfect backstory, I will prove that Venat is objectively The Best Waifu.

Preferences for appearance are extremely subjective, but it is certainly true that society as a whole has preferences for individual appearance. To simplify this point, I will proceed with the assumption that traits that are seen as attractive or desirable by a large proportion of people are "better" in terms of rating a waifu. Venat's notable physical features are her tall height and long proportions, her blue eyes, and her curly, voluminous white hair. First, multiple studies corroborate the idea that taller people are seen as more attractive, higher status, and higher prestige, benefits that Venat would receive at her towering height of 6'2". Next, according to a survey of 1000 people by 1800contacts, blue had the most votes for "Most desired eye color in a partner", almost doubling the number of votes for the next lowest color. In addition, 47.6% of respondents said that they would choose to have blue eyes if they could choose their eye color. Thus, blue is obviously the best eye color for a waifu to have. Finally, Venat's hair solidifies her position as having the perfect visuals. According to a survey commissioned by L'oreal in 2013 of 2000 U.S. adults, nearly 80% of women respondents would choose to have curly hair if they could, while only 16% of respondents chose straight, and 42% of male participants said that they saw curly haired women as sexy. Obviously, curly hair is seen as an attractive and desirable trait among the populace (though I am not sure why the results were reported in such a heteronormative way. Anecdotally, as a woman, I would also agree that curly haired women are sexy. No, this essay is not biased). Additionally, as an artist, long curly hair is the most fun to draw, and white hair is the most fun to render, therefore it is obviously the best combination. Thus, it is clear that Venat has the perfect combination of physical traits for a waifu.

As the popularity of hit Chainsaw Man’s female lead Makima shows, mommy-type character personalities are at an all-time high of popularity. Compared to many other mommy-type characters, Makima is notable for just how popular she is, in conjunction with the casual dominance and condescension with which she treats the other characters. The Ancients of FFXIV as a race are somewhat similar to Makima - they held a superiority complex over the rest of life on Etheirys. The Ancients saw it as their duty to guide, nurture, and also control the trajectory of other life forms on the planet. This is reflected in Hermes’s decision to end life without consent of the rest of the universe, as mentioned by Yoshi-P in a live letter lore discussion. Venat’s decision to sunder everyone without the consent of the majority is also a reflection of this sense of control and superiority, beyond even that of her Ancient peers, putting her on equal grounds with Makima as far as her level of dominance, and her position as a god watching over the world of Etheirys. Venat stands out above other waifus with these qualities when it comes to personality due to the love she exhibits for the player as well. When talking about the best waifu, it is important to consider that the character that turns you on the most is not necessarily the best wife material, much as it is with 3D love interests. Many characters, like Makima, who have the attractive dominating personality, do not possess other personality qualities that would make them good partners. However, Venat is, in addition to being assertive and dominant, adventurous, kind, ambitious, virtuous (dedicated her existence to helping others and fighting for individual autonomy and freedom), talented, and intelligent. In fact, one would be hard-pressed to name any negative personality traits that she might have. In the story, the Ancient's penchant for making decisions for others was seen as a major character flaw in all of the notable members of the race, but given that dominance is a desirable trait in waifus, it cannot be considered a flaw. Aside from this, she may be argued to be a "himbo", consistent with her role as past Azem in the FFXIV story, however, the juxtaposition of this with her traits of being a caretaker and mentor, create a "moe-gap", which is also a desirable trait in waifus. Therefore, she has the perfect personality for a waifu, and all the flaws she may have actually work in her favor (no, this essay is not biased).

Finally, due to the perfect backstory, Venat is truly the perfect waifu. One drawback of having a waifu is the fact that it is ultimately a type of parasocial relationship - no matter how much you love your waifu, usually, they exist within an enclosed story and can never love you back or even know who you are. However, the FFXIV story is written in a way to create a real relationship between Venat and the player's character, and the real love and care that Venat feels for the player character is clear as day in the writing of Endwalker. In addition, the setup for this backstory is the likes of which would more often be seen in something like a soulmate fanfiction. Having been close associates in a previous life, the player character and Venat meet again far in the future - and the truth comes to light that Venat had been watching over the player character for a long time, protecting them, so that you could fulfill a promise you made to each other. The fact that Venat dies at the end of 6.0 is only another reason why she is an even better waifu. As the classic appeal of Romeo and Juliet shows, star-crossed lovers are seen as a paragon of love.

Venat has the ideal looks, personality, and story, making her the perfect waifu. Thus, for all of these reasons, she is clearly The Best Waifu. With her introduction to the world in the release of Endwalker, we live her iconic words: "No more shall man have confusion over who is the best waifu. Henceforth he shall worship the Mother Crystal." And although she is gone in the canon story, our love for her and the infinite possibilities for headcanons, fanfiction, and fanart that she provides us will live on forever.

[thebranchesofshe]

Abe Kisro

"I just go walkin' sometimes when I sleep. I see people long gone. My mama had it too, and I hope she ain't still walkin' now that she's gone. By the way, Miz Liz, that paintin' of a horse in your son's room is the most heartbreakin' beautiful thing I ever seen."

Three words: observant, unorthodox, empathetic.

Name: Aberham Kisro

Date of birth: April 9, 1948.

Age as of Chapter I: 22.

Height: 6'2"

Gender: Gender? I hardly know her! (He's such a boy.)

Orientation: yes.

Occupation: nothing at the moment but there's a vacancy at Vick's Diner.

Where's his middle mame?: don't have one.

Is his name really spelled like that?: yes and it's gotten him out of a few jams when someone was looking for an "Abraham" Kisro.

Favorite book: he doesn't read so well. His brain gets a little cloudy.

Favorite film: he doesn't really go to pictures either.

Favorite treat: the boy has a soft spot for chocolate cake.

Background: he was born in east Texas and lived there all his life until just now. His mother was a sex worker and his father was a circus clown who quite literally came and went. Abe was mostly deafened by a shotgun blast when he was 12, which is around the time he dropped out of school. Not because he was deaf, but because he figured he could read, write, and do math, the basic tools anyone needs. That, and he needed money. He tended to horses since he was small. By 13 he was driving farm trucks. By 17 his mother had died and he went into boxing after discovering after one too many fistfights that he could get hit a lot and not fall down. He's a 6'2" welterweight.

Why is he in Tennessee?: he killed a guy.

How?: guy starved and dehydrated to make the weight class and died during the bout.

Sounds like an accident: yeah, and it is, but Abe was traumatized by it and swore off of boxing and violence in general. He also started having photosensitive seizures after too many hits to the dome. He had no real ties or roots anywhere so he started drifting from town to town in his truck. Tennessee is a pretty nice place to be, he heard.

What's with the walkin' thing?: he astral projects when he goes to sleep. Make no mistake, he knows exactly what that is.

What does he want?: he wants connection, community, roots... to help people, do good. He doesn't quite know how, but he wants to try. He's been looking for a place to put down roots for a long time.

Can he see the man with the blurry face?: and how!

Does he like books? Movies?: he can't make much sense of fiction, but he likes art books and nonfiction stuff, and movies are too visually unpredictable, but he likes that they're loud. Mostly he just likes watching public access television. It's kind of fascinating to him. He likes music, folk, country, prog rock, but he can't listen to it often because he needs it loud.

What else?: he's constantly drawing. All the time. Keeps notepads on him. Draws surreal little doodles of people he sees.

What would he change about himself if he could?: he would like to not have seizures. Why do you ask?

There's someone coming to Decaelo who might be able to take them away: Lyle? Lyle Everett Love? The faith healer? That guy's a phony.

Does he know any sign language?: not much, but he has some stolen library books about it and he sometimes practices in front of a mirror. He wishes he had someone to talk to.

Does he have any friends?: he hopes he will soon.

Any enemies?: it's hard to have beef with a dadaist noodle.

What does he look like?: tall slender pale dude with very straight black hair that's always a little greasy and a little too long to do much with, so he brushes it back. Pale blue eyes, tall forehead, little upturned nose. He wears sunglasses all the time and has a scar on his cheek.

Bro you're just describing like... a strung out 70's Nick Cave: shut up no I'm not.

I lied, bitch!

[castle-dominion]

Half of one. 4x8 heartbreak hotel.

Castle??? Castle has been to this bar 20 years ago & is still kicked out my guess.

Poor depressed alexis. No murder teaser today The 80s are so right

Where is atlantic city? Heavy? oh gun Six Still aSleep Cylinder (Ooh ryan's outfit today hhh except the stripes, espt is wearing pyjamas again tho) Come on captions, let me hear The Gambler being quoted! CASTLE: Well, you gotta know when to hold ‘em. And know when to fold ‘em. ESPOSITO: Know when to walk away, and know when to run. At least the transcript has it [Lanie glares at Esposito.] LP: Detective Esposito, a little respect please? I mean, there is a dead body here. JE: What’d I do? [Lanie turns away with a saucy/annoyed tilt of her head.] RC: You broke up with her. JE: We broke up with each -other. That’s different. RC: Yeah, you think it’d be different, but no. JE: (to Beckett)What’d you tell him? KB: No, I told you I’m staying out of this one.

JE: Women. You sure you want to spend the rest of your life with one? KR: Uh, yeah. !! Mine likes me. RC: (chuckles) Ooh! Speaking of Atlantic City… perfect place for a bachelor party. KR: JE: Ooh, that’s what I’m talking about, bro. KR: JE: We could rent one of these right here, hit the casino, maybe the club. KR: Uh, I was thinking more along the lines of…camping trip. [Castle bursts out laughing, but Ryan looks serious.] RC: Oh, you were…oh. JE: Uh, first of all, no. Second, it’s not up to you. The bachelor party is strictly best man territory. And, by the way, your big date is what? Like, two months away? So, you need to officially tell the guy so that he can start planning something. KR: I still got some time. Um, I--I’m gonna go check on those cameras. [Ryan leaves.] JE: What the f--? Did you see that? He just sidestepped me. What’s that about? RC: It’s almost as though the thought of marriage fills him with an impending sense of doom. (chuckles) Oh, no, wait, that’s me. You know, having a best man is just So Gay. You're proposing to another man to be by your side at a wedding.

RS: We don’t really get along anymore. Me: Well yeah, that's why u got a divorce I'm beginning to remember this episode. There is some intense stuff & I don't understand it. Good thing I'm watching twice & care more about the characters than the mystery. I suddenly figured out why people like writing high school AUs.

Rick trails off as soon as gates looks at him

VG: Go to atlantic city. KR: *Checks his watch twice over* That's true, I thought she meant all the boys but then castle isn't one of the boys he's some tagalong but then she DID want him to go with them & it's good bc then she gets to see becks working w/o castle. She's going to be frustrated & angry without his comic relief & coffee taxiing.

[Castle stops the elevator from closing, he looks all silly & squished.] JE: What are you doing? RC: What does it look like? Did you think I was gonna pass up a road trip to the Boardwalk Empire? (Wow he really is 6'2") The east coast epicenter of dancing, gambling, showgirls, and sin? KR: You do realize we’re going there to investigate a murder, don’t you? RC: Gentlemen, *puts arms around them* JE: *looks at castle's arm around him in discomfort* RC: if I have learned one thing, it’s to not let a little thing like murder get in the way of having a good time. *espt shakes his head, ryan frowns* Oh, and also…shotgun.

Poor ryan, espt always drives & castle, the non-cop, somehow had them respect his call for shotgun "Love you bai!" He loves his daughter sm.

KR: Ah… I’m starting to understand why you ditched Beckett. A--and for the record, the one guy in this car who’s not a real cop is not allowed to call shotgun! RC: Called it fair and square. *KR shakes head* JE: Maybe Castle’s right. I mean, since we’re gonna be there, we might as well consider The Sapphire as a potential bachelor party venue. *smirks slightly to castle* RC: I’m so happy you said that, because there are a number of establishments down there that cater to bachelor party events. I think maybe we should take a little sampling. KR: No, no, no. We are not “sampling” any clubs. JE: What? *looks at him in the rear-view* Come on, bro. Why are you stallin’ us on this? KR: Look, Javier, (he doesn't tap the r, & pronounces it with three syllables instead of two) I— I… (sigh) I've got some bad news. I had to ask Jenny’s half-brother, Nelson, to be my best man. JE: *face falls* RC: *turns to look out the window* JE: Nelson? KR: *looking sadly down* JE: That guy I met at your birthday party? (I'd like to see that. Someone write a fanfic.) Sixteen with braces? Couldn’t stop talking about being a mathlete? KR: It was a family thing. I--I didn’t have a choice. JE: Yeah, you did. RC: No, actually, when it comes to weddings, uh, (chuckling) you don’t. Trust me, you do not want to start a marriage with a family feud. JE: RC: *looks back out the window* JE: This sucks. >:( KR: I know, JE: And I was gonna give you an awesome sendoff, bro. KR: Ugh, I know! RC: Well, boys, I’m sorry. I’m sorry it had to come to this. I didn’t want it to, but it looks like we have no choice. There is no other way. I.B.P.W.O.C. Me: what (also, we should start saying "wed" not "double-yu" RC: Impromptu Bachelor Party While On Case! *holds up for a high five which nobody takes*

I am quoting too much Nice music lol CASTLE: Ah…smell that? That is the smell of hopes, dreams, and endless opportunities. RYAN: Not to be confused with cigarette smoke, day drinking, and desperation.

Love her hair RC: Who's playing? KR: (poor guy looks so uncomfy)

Beckett is wearing PJs this time. Maybe she WAS dressing for castle like he says in s5

This tony fellow. Card counting is legal as long as you can remember it. Btw Dan Sullivan looks like a half-brother mathlete nelson Ryan: sitting straigh Espt: Sitting normal Castle: Standing Is that... slang for sexual favours? Or is it for good luck? Is the good luck smth you only ask your girl for?

Well that's loud, & also I love the little old lady there

LT, one of the two cops I know have names! Along with Velasquez I swear to god AND MY MOTHER I respect this guy.

rystlesito is great lol I know I'm trans & folk catholic but I want to try burlesque. RC: *excited* JE: *pleased* KR: *uncomfy* that is a LOT of cams

Castle: *grabs a chair & rolls over* What about me? DS: Disorderly conduct, resisting arrest in 2003 and, uh…wow. Apparently the last time you were at The Sapphire you accidentally set a mattress on fire and the drapes were covered in.. jam. KR: JE:

I love how gates is beckett's partner here *calls espt rather than ryan or castle* Love ryan's voice: No bloody lip yet. Let it play, please.

Ryan *casually puts hands in pockets, revealing his sexy waistcoat & badge* Haymaker not hook I think but idk He was On The Floor when that happened? CT: And now it’s today and my friend is dead and the money’s still gone. Oof

KB: ... Actually, that’s something that Castle’s pretty good at. VG: *eyebrow* KB: Taking a look at what we have and then helping to find that piece.

This gal looks like someone I know, a mix of several ppl I know. She also does not look like a SW but yk don't judge a book. RC: Well, what with mobile devices being so small and slim, perhaps he had it in his hand. KR: *gestures to castle meaning "yeah what he said"* Amber: His hands were otherwise occupied. RC: *waiting* Amber: KR: *squinting* JE: *looks at rystle* KR+RC: *faces immediately change* RC: OH. JE: *looks back to amber like "my friends are so dumb"* RC: OH, *laughing* I get it. THAT KIND OF MASSAGE. *looks her down*

Gates & beckett are talking to Ryan here. Castle is there too & espt is off somewhere else.

WOAH OK THAT WAS INSANE (also the way espt turns around with his arms out. so cut but the muzzle control is not making me happy)

Mum paused the show to tell us about the time she accidentally threw a party very similar to this. Mum was the goody two shoes kid like alexis & accidentally threw a party like alexis. She was also a wild child sometimes like castle & needs me to parent her, like castle.

CT seems like he is not the guy tbh. Love the music design there with them getting phsyically thrown out XD & the rolling & falling is so good. You can tell that they are actors but idc bc it is great

KB: (on cell) Okay, sit tight. I’m driving down. RC: (on speakerphone) No, no…! KR: (on speakerphone) Beckett, we-- you don’t have to do that. We have – JE: No! We’ve got-- no, we really-- RC: …we got it. KR: Yeah, she’s gone.

Poor alexis, accidentally started a party. Really is like my mom. Cut to RC: This is the worst Impromptu Bachelor Party While On Case ever. JE: This is humiliating. We’re homicide detectives with the NYPD. KR: Unfortunately, we’re in New Jersey. At least we’re not on a ticking clock because a woman’s been kidnapped. *hits espt on chest* Oh! Wait. *espt looks at where ryan touched him* We are. There’s got to be some other way we can get in. *Castle sees a bellhop push some costumes into the casino, leans way over, & smirks.* I HAVE SEEN IMAGES FROM THIS & I AM SO EXCITED. Except facial recognition measures the points between your face doesn't it? distance between the eyes? eye to the tip of the nose?

I need to stop I need to not I can't do this this is too good i will die i have work in an hour (well what I mean is I need to leave for work in an hour & a third & then I actually start my shift in nearly 3 hours but it is not a short bus ride & I need to be there early enough to change but that means I need to take the earlier bus instead of the bus that gets me there only 5 minutes on-time rather than 15 minutes early ugh I forgot to take my anti-depressants yesterday & so I'm hella angry rn. I don't like having a job. The horrors. Maybe if it was an easier commute, I didn't have to iron clothes, & it was JUST line cooking, no prep, or JUST prep & no line cooking, & I actually understood what I was doing, & I didn't have to take a long bus ride in the heat, & I actually passed for male, & I understood whom I'm supposed to confirm my breaks with, & I only had to work 5 hours instead of anything more like the horrific 8, I would be ok. But sadly that is not the case. I should take my anti-anxieties.)

Ok I pressed play & it only lasted for a few seconds. I love the way the two of them are wearing the same outfit but castle in the middle is not. Also daaaang I love seeing ryan's I-have-hip-problems walk with that shirt undone so far, & then even castle's walk is good, & tbh espt is doing p good himself. Can you believe I went through a phase I thought I was a lesbian?

[The boys enter the casino as Elvis impersonators. Castle passes a showgirl and they catch each other's eye. She inspects his outfit.] SHOWGIRL: Very nice. RC: (Elvis voice) Thank you. Thank you very much. [Castle turns back around.] JE: How do you know she wasn’t talking to me? RC: (chuckles) Well… [Castle indicates his costume.] JE: What? Elvis can’t be brown? I’m Elvez. (XD XD XD I LOVE IT F YEAH NATIVE BOY) [Esposito turns around and struts off. He nods to some strangers nearby.] JE: Hey! How you doing? [The boys pass security personelle.]

I need a fic of castle pitching the idea now

In some way I'm all for holding 10mil hostage to get out of sleeping with him. [The bouncers find them.] JE: Oh, hey, guys. Uh, we were just leaving. KR: This isn’t the ballroom. Huh. [Ryan and Esposito exit, but the bouncers stop Castle from leaving.] This is the 16 hours previous, isn't it? It might have been 6am, now it is midnight, that's 16 hours. Long day of work huh. You know, legally you can only have someone work up to 16 hours & not longer than that.

Oh no the piano Oh no the gizmos too! Castle would be mad but proud. AC: Now everybody: OUT! Cut to rysposito getting thrown out KR: Really? JE: Really? If it wasn’t illegal I’d kick your ass. (tho I can't tell if espt said both "really"s or if one was from each like the transcript claims.)

Love how castle is just letting his feet hang yk it took me a second in the beginning to realize it was castle. The cutting for the intro was, interesting Wait illuminati? I like the card playing analogies.

Beckett: *walking out* *stops when she sees her boys looking like elvis & elvez* [Beckett arrives to find Ryan and Esposito in their Elvis costumes.] JE: Oh… KR: Um… funny story? KB: JE: We, uh… Look, this is… We can explain. KB: No, I’m not even sure I want to know. KR+JE: It was Castle’s idea. [Castle exits the casino.] RC: And it worked. I know who killed Sam. All three: Who?

Love the way ryan points that little sneer castle does lol

Oh thank goodness they are back to normal. I really like dan. You said you'd let her go. & just stares down the mobster. *leaves the laptop up* That was ryan not charlie... TM: Come on. If I killed Sam, you’d think you would ever have found the body? The guy you’re looking for ain’t me. He's right He's right again, u can't get money from a dead guy He forged her signature. When her laawyer found out the layer killed sam.

Oh yay back in NY, finally they got some sleep.

Oh wait I was wrong it was not a forgery or a lawyer. Girl u should have burned it. RS: So, when he told me that someone wanted him dead, I thought, “Here’s my chance.” Wait americans can just do that? Don't you need a license to own a gun? You need a license to carry & a license for concealed carry, right? Gosh that's scary. We should get rid of guns. If you want to fight someone, do it right.

I like gates. I like her jelly beans VG: You mean Castle. KB: You said it, not me. [Beckett takes some candy.] VG: He’s not a cop. KB: Yeah, but that’s what makes him so good. VG: (scoffs)Well, speaking of which, where are they? KB: I gave them the afternoon off. Apparently, Ryan got stuck with an underage best man, so the boys are giving him the unofficial bachelor party. VG: I trust you’ll edit their side of the investigation in the report.

Poor alexis, but I love the music Took castle a long time to open the door. Becks gave them the afternoon off tho, why is he back so early? & why does he seem SO hungover? RC: Where’s the, um… where’s the little silver dog statue that’s usually on the back of the couch? AC: Oh, I think Gram said she needed it for set dressing for her play. casually blames gram XD Alexis should have also leaned her head back on the couch like rick. Would have been a good ending.

So I have to go to work in half an hour & I want to punch smth. I'm usually fine once I get there but it's just... starting out is difficult. I can feel my face getting red as I type this from the anxiety. idk what to do for the first part of my shift. idk who to talk to. idk where to get instruction from. The sous chef & the chef are both busy af so I shouldn't talk to them but idk who the shift leader is. I hate doing prep when idk what I'm doing, I hate the cramped space there, I wish I was skinny not necessarily for aesthetic purposes but for mobility purposes. I wish I had a better memory I wish I had better communication I wish we had a 4 hour work day with a four day work week. Except that's full-time, I wish I personally got a 3 day work week. Edit: I'm content with my two day work week. I might be happier with a 3 day work week if I didn't have 8h shifts

So wish me luck. I love you all. I'll be sure to work on my fanfics on the bus ride there.

[millenialfanfictionaddiction]

Polyship with Atsumu and Oikawa:

Are you ok YN?

Oikawa Toru x Miya Atsumu x Female! Reader

Warnings: None? It's so wholesome 🥺 again idk what's wrong with me 🥺

AN: This is a request from my bestie Spooky anon!

🏳️‍🌈 Please Like, Share, Comment to support my writing 🏳️‍🌈

I spent a good long while laughing at this 🤣

Because like OMG YN-

Like are you seeing the same picture above that I am?

Because like these two are literally copy cat versions of one another

I just imagine them being on Team A during the promotional match and I can't deal 😅

Like how chaotic

But you know what, we love this for you

Honestly if anyone can handle it, it's definitely you

Our queen, our SAVIOR 👏🏻

YN the great 👑

So because these two are SO dramatic

Imma make this one UBER dramatic mkay 💅🏼

First off, you were hired by Kuroo as Team A's Manager

You lucky B-

Nope not today Tiffany, not about you 🤚🏻

However, our bbys didn't know this yet

So after you were hired, you decided to celebrate wirh your favorite drink at a local coffee house

Looking all stunning in your power suit and gorgeous face 😍

You get in line when you suddenly feeling a looming presence behind you

As in like 6'2" looming-

You turn around to see a man who really needs to tone his hair but hey he's cute 👀

You smile as he smirks back at you 😏

You turn around to walk up to the counter when some jerk face cuts you off

"Hey! I was next"- you say

The man looks down at you, rolls his eyes and turns to place his order

Oof 😬

"Umm excuse me"- you say tapping the man on the shoulder

He ignores you until 👀

"Hey jerk face"- the man behind you booms

"You cut this gorgeous lady off as well as me and these other people. Now get in the back of the line before I rearrange your face"- the blonde says as the man in front of you turns to face you

"I'd like to see you try"- the man says as the blonde pulls you out of the way and behind him

"Sir- you need to leave or get to the back of the line now!"- the batista shouts at the rude jerk

He scoffs as the blonde gets in his face and pushes him towards the door

"Get the fuck out and don't come back ya hear!"- the blonde says shoving the man out the door and onto the sidewalk

Everyone watches and cheers as the blonde comes back in

"Are you ok?"- he asks you approaching

"Yeah I'm ok. You?"- you say smiling back

"I'm great. Now let's get you your coffee gorgeous. By the way, my name is Miya Atsumu"

"LN YN"- you say shaking his hand and going to order

Now I won't get into much because I feel like you'd talk with Atsumu and then you'd both part ways

Atsumu is definitely kicking himself for not asking for your number

Little does he know 😏😏😏

Now you met Oikawa in much a similar way

Randomly before you started your manager job

While grocery shopping, you were reaching for a loaf of milk bread 😏

Your hand touched someone's as you quickly pulled it away

"Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry!"- you say, apologizing

"Oh no please after you"- the man says smiling back

"There's only one left. I insist- I don't need it, I can make my own at home"- you

The man 👉🏻😳 you- you can make milk bread?

You smile and nod

"Milk bread is my favorite but I've never had homemade before"- he says

"Oh its really good! I make mine a little sweeter than most. Oh gosh, how rude of me not to introduce myself, my name is LN YN"- you say extending you hand

"Oikawa Toru but please call me Toru"- he says shaking your hand

"Well it was very nice to meet you Toru, I hope you enjoy the milk bread!"- you say, waving to him as you stroll away

Oikawa 👉🏻👁👄👁 thank you

Please Oikawa is too stunned to even move

By the time he realizes it, you've already left and he's cursing himself for not grabbing your number

🙃🙃🙃 don't we just love how things work out

The chaos I create makes me so happy 🥰

The guys all line up, waiting to meet their new manager

Please Oikawa and Atsumu are forced to stand together 😃

It's going great-

Not

"Will you please not stand so close to me?"- Atsumu says

"Maybe if your ego wasn't so big you'd have more room!"- Oikawa retorts

Team A 👉🏻😐🙄

Please we all know Kuroo created the teams just to cause this chaos 🤚🏻

The door opens and you stroll in

Gorgeous in your leggings and Team A shirt, hair tied up

Atsumu and Oikawa 👉🏻😐😳😲

You smile when you see them, waving at them

Everyone looks at Oikawa and Atsumu as they both say in tandem "Hi YN"

Atsumu and Oikawa look at each other and we'll, the picture above is literally them 👆🏻

You just giggle and smile "it's nice to see you Atsumu and Toru"

Our boys instantly stop fighting and immediately swoon over you

Now I think we all know exactly how this is going to go YN

They will fight for your affections the entire time

It's literally "YN did you see that setter dump?" "YN did you see that perfect set?"

YN this, YN that

Of course you are an absolute angel and you just adore them both

They will silently fight over you for weeks

Until one day, Oikawa decides to be Oikawa

"Hey YN! I was wondering if you'd like to go to the museum with me?"

Atsumu hears this and RUNS 🏃‍♂️ to you

"I was going to ask YN if she wanted to go to the outdoor gardens with me!"- Sumu

Again, see picture above for reference of interaction 🤪

"I know! Why don't we do the museum and gardens together"- you 🥰

The boys look at you and then at each other

They see how happy you look and both nod in agreement

Now this definitely has the makings of one of those polyships where it's like enemies to lovers for two other characters but they both have a mutual interest in the third person

Now, your date out with the two of them goes surprisingly well

I mean, as well as any Atsumu and Oikawa interaction can go 😬

They did argue and try to one up each other like usual

But they also managed to agree on a few things

Like that they both desire to beat Kageyama

and that they both think you are adorable 🥰

As the weeks progress, they somehow get in a routine with each other

Yes there is fights but they somehow manage to keep it locked down

"Hey YN, how about we go to the movies tonight?"- Oikawa

"There's this great Sci-fy movie playing" Sumu adds

"Great idea Sumu!"- Oikawa says as everyone on team A stares in stunned silence

You agree and hug the boys as you turn to see the team

The team 👉🏻👁👄👁

You 👉🏻🤷‍♀️

Your feelings develop as you grow close to both of them

BUT I also their their feelings for each other would develop too

Lile they realize they are more alike than anything

While I know them both to be super competitive, I don't think they would compete over you

Especially since I do see them as caring for you and seeing how the other one makes you happy

It's like a cohesive unit 🥰

A unit that sometimes fights over who is the better setter but still 💅🏼

In fact, it's actually Atsumu and Toru who being up the idea of a polyship to you

Now I can't say you haven't been conflicted

I mean, who wouldn't be

You literally have two hotties at your beck and call YN

Your feelings for both were strong but you'd never want to break up a team or a budding friendship by ruining it with feelings

Honestly same YN 😔

So you took what you could get and just let whatever you three had together develop

So when Sumu turned off the TV one night and faced you and Toru you were confused

"YN what do you think we have here?"- Sumu

Blunt approach- ok cool 👌🏻

"Umm well- I uh"- you, nervous

"YN Sumu just wants to know what you consider us"- Toru

Ok not clearing things up here but we must forge on

You 👉🏻🤨 umm well-

"Toru and I consider you more than a friend"- Sumu interjects

Literally this is a conversation between Sumu and Toru and YN is just an invited guest 😅

"I consider you guys that too"- you say

"Ok then it's settled"- Toru

You 👉🏻👀 what's settled

Congrats YN you now have two Boyfriends 🥰

What a dynamic team honestly 😅 love that for you

Your relationship has its ups and downs like most

But honestly you all manage to make it work

Toru gets homemade milk bread

You and Sumu take trips to the get coffee everyday

You talk to Kageyama-

Wait 🤚🏻

Yep that's right? Your boys are literally sulking in the corner as you talk to their arch nemesis

"Ugh why does YN have to talk to him?"- Oikawa murmers

"Right? She's out Manager and girlfriend" Atsumu

"You two are so pathetic"- Sakusa says walking by

Suddenly it happens, Kageyama pushes your hair back from your face

Faster than lightening Oikawa and Atsumu are right beside you

The literally said "I am SPEED" 🏃‍♂️ 🏃‍♂️

"Ahh get your filthy hands off of my YN"- Toru

"Our YN"- Atsumu 😑

"Right our YN"- Oikawa says pushing you behind him

"Toru stop"- you say as Oikawa and Atsumu face off with Kageyama

You manage to squeeze yourself in between the three, pushing Toru and Sumu away

"I'm so sorry about this Tobio. I'll talk to you later"- you say, shoving the boulders known as your boyfriends away

"You call him Tobio"- Atsumu 😱

Oikawa is literally making this face as you push him away 👇🏻

You just roll your eyes

"Having fun YN"- Aran laughs as he walks by

You 👉🏻😐 the time of my life

Seriously YN, that feels like your life motto dating two of the best setters in Japan 🥰

[themorphine]

3rd Times a Charm Chap 1

"Excuse me? What did you just say?"

Alis rolled her eyes and took another sip of her wine. "I said you should sign up for tinder."

I looked at her in shock. She set her wine glass down before she would spill it on the white couch."Why would I need to go on tinder?"

"Come on Feyre, It's been like what? 3 years since you broke up with Tamlin. It's time to move on!"

My spine locked up a bit at the reminder of Tamlin. She was right, it had been 3 years since she broke up with his sorry ass, but the memories still stayed. The only person she ever told was Alis. All her sisters knew was that shit went down, but that was pretty much it. One day she thought. One day I'll tell them.

" I have moved on. I'm just not into dating anyone. Being single is nice." That was true. I loved having my own space, but indeed there were days when she lay awake wishing that there was someone sleeping beside her, their hand around her waist keeping her close w-

"You don't even have to go out with anyone! Just get back into the game and see who out there! Pleaseeeee Feyre!" Alis begged, her hands clamping together.

"You are a little minx. Fine I will download tinder, Not to get a date but just to see."

Alis nodded vigorously, her eyes alight with excitement. I pulled out my phone and went into the app store. Alis took the phone from my hand because I was "taking too long." We set up my profile, and after many attempts to stop her, my profile picture was one we took at Velaris park. I thought it was a bad one but Alis insisted on it and one thing I learned from our friendship was that Alis never budges. I wonder if that's what makes her such a good guardian for her two nephews.

"Okay. Your profile is set up!" she exclaimed. I snatched the phone back before she could make any matches for me. I swiped through tinder, finding an alarming rate of males with fish in their hands. As I was scrolling my eyes snagged on one person

Name: Cassian

Age: 26

Height: 6'2

He was Not really my type, but the wine was making my brain go mush so I swiped right. A few minutes later I got a notification saying "it's a match!" I clicked on the message and was lead to a chat between me and this Cassian.

Hey!

My thumbs hovered over the keypad, wondering what to respond with

Hey! What's up? I replied

Nothing much, just talking to you. Pictures are gorgeous by the way

I blushed a bit. Alis caught that and smirked at me

Not to be rude, but I have had a lot of wine, and ur not really my type. Well, you are but your not. And don't try to woo me by saying my pictures are gorgeous, you gotta try harder than that.

My apologies ma'am, why not I take you out tomorrow so you can decide whether I'm up to your boyfriend checklist

I snickered at that. This man definitely had a good sense of humor.

Fine. But no guarantees, I already told you that your not my type. 5 pm tomorrow at Rita's

Fine by me

I turned off my phone and got up, my feet swaying slightly from the wine. Alis was passed out on the couch, her wine on the coffee table. I smiled at that and placed a blanket over her. She moved slightly before sinking back into unconsciousness.

I walked over to my room and plopped into bed. I lay awake wishing again that I had someone to hold me, or someone to hold.

Hope you enjoy!!

[captainjimothycarter]

Tattoo artist Peggy and florist shop owner Steve.

You'd think it be reversed but nah Steve puts his creative art towards florist shop making. He knows not many people care about the language of flowers but he does.

And it seems so does the new tattoo shop across the street does too.

What many people think is just a beautiful daily change of flowers outside both of their shops is in reality a competition going on between them and Peggy is winning thank you very much.

Steve's not letting her go down without hell of a fight and she appreciates that.

However for a man that's 6'2 and 250 pounds and looks like he should be an Olympic Weightlifter, he's a complete fucking dork.

And damn does she love it.

Of course how they meet is anything but traditional.

Steve burst into Peggy's half finished tattoo shop - ready to open next week. He doesnt say a word beyond "borrowing", steals her wrench, and leaves.

She chases him back to find his shop flooded and gets a proper scolding after they both fix the pipe.

"You could've said something!"

"My brain was in panic mode! I was gonna bring the wrench back."

"Thats not the point - how often are your pipes leaking?"

"It bursted this time but its been overdue. Its an old building so...monthly at least."

"I'm calling a plumber."

"I cant afford that!"

"No one says you have to. Besides he's not offically a plumber just a guy with skills who owes me a favor. Nice mums, by the way I havent seen that purple in years."

That's how Peggy ends up with a bushel of mums on her doorstep and a note that says, "I was stupid and lucky you didnt hit me with that pistol when I barged in. Your pictures are crooked, I fixed em myself. Your welcome."

It becomes a friendly spat between them. Passive aggressive but friendly over state of their shops and what's wrong.

Peggy can't help but adore this guy who gives old ladies free roses and helps them bring their groceries to their apartments or watch as he listens to an old veteran tell his tale outside his shop while they share a coffee. He's an old soul, she finds, an unusual one at that.

Steve finds a few months later a letter pinned to his door from her despite cellphones perfectly exist, "I have a project I need your assistance on. Beer and pizza on me. 7pm. Hudson Garage."

He can't deny he's curious and that's what drives him to take a cab towards their destination. Peggy is laying on the ground, underside of a bike straight from one of his sketches. She is all grins when he's there. She's covered in oil, a streak of grease over her brow.

"What's this?" Steve breaths tenderly touching the bike.

"I think you know. Have you suddenly gone blind? Should I call your mum?" Despite this she's grinning. "Howard gave it to me. Figured you'd need a project to keep you busy during low season given winter and all."

"How'd you know? And he just gave this to you? No way."

"I pay attention. Yes way, I asked him for it and he aint using it."

"You're starting to sound like a Brooklyn native everyday."

"My worst nightmare." Peggy shudders. "Besides I dont need you breaking in and stealing my wrenches again while I got clients. Howard says you fix this, it's yours. Plus it'll keep you outta his way while he fixes your shop up. 101 year old building..."

"Pegs." Steves almost crying. "How can I thank you?"

"Well a date or two might make up for this trouble."

[tonystark-is-daddy-af-blog]

The Less I Know the Better Part III: Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus

Part (III/?): Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus

“Hey, Peter!” Happy yelled out as Peter entered the lobby.

“Hey, Happy!” Peter confidently strutted towards the two men, journal and pen in hand.

“This is your tutor, Wade,” the man turned around and stopped Peter in his tracks upon seeing the mystery man’s face.

Wade Wilson was perfect. He had piercing green eyes, a defined jawline with a bit of stubble on it, sharp cheekbones, small freckles across his perfect nose… brown messy hair… he was 6'2 at least and his biceps were threatening to rip out from under his tight misfits shirt.

“Hey man, what’s up?” The man put out a fist. “The name’s Wade, bump it.”

Peter gave the mystery man an awkward fist bump. “You’re a teacher? Aren’t you kind of… young?”

“Oh no, I’m not a teacher, I’m a tutor-slash-intern,” He explained with a mischievous smirk. “I’m only 17, but I know the freshmen curriculum enough to teach it to you so here I am.”

“How much do they pay you?” Peter asked with a skeptical look across his face. This guy was way too young to be teaching.

“They pay me shit, but you gotta do what you gotta do, am I right?”

“Yes, you’re right…I guess,” Peter fumbled nervously with his pen.

“Don’t worry, we’re gonna have a lot of fun,” Wade wrapped an arm around Peter’s shoulder. Peter could smell the cheap cologne and cigarettes on Wade… but it was surprisingly pleasant. Those muscles pressed against him definitely weren’t something to complain about either. “See ya later, Hap, thanks for your help.”

Wade kept his arm around Peter as they walked across the lobby. “Where do you want to begin the lesson? Is there a library around here?”

“Um, I have a desk in my room, if you want to work there.”

“Sweet. Let’s go.” Wade released Peter and dug into his messenger bag as they walked. He pulled out a pack of cigarettes, placing one in his mouth and lighting it. “You don’t mind if I smoke, right?”

“No…I guess not…” Peter shrugged. “I’m not sure what Mr. Stark’s policy is though.”

“Oh well, I won’t tell anyone if you don’t,” Wade took a hit of his cigarette before winking at Peter.

Oh god, not now. Peter blushed as he felt heat rush to his groin. They continued the walk to Peter’s room, with Peter holding his journal to his thighs, hoping to God that Wade wouldn’t notice his growing problem….

–

Overall, the lecture went well. Peter had sat at his desk writing while Wade made himself comfortable…too comfortable… in Peter’s bed. Wade had thrown himself on the bed, feet against the pillows, all the paper’s from his messenger bag dumped across the sheets. It was hard to focus with the constant throbbing in between Peter’s legs but he did the best he could. Wade had covered the different themes found in The Scarlet Letter, the first of many books that they would be reading together, and then he had explained to Peter the right way to write an essay.  Despite Wade’s overall rebellious attitude, he was very well read and was a lot more intelligent than Peter was expecting.

“Make sure you read all the way to chapter 8 by tomorrow,” Wade told Peter as he packed up his bag. “This class is going to move by fast, you gotta read 3 books over these next couple weeks and write me three essays, so gotta keep up.”

“Okay, I will.” Peter nodded in agreement.

“Nice meeting you, shorty, I’ll see you tomorrow,” Wade put his fist out again and Peter bumped it. Wade made his way out the door and Peter was memorized by the way his ass looked in those tight jeans. Peter looked down at the bulge growing in his pants again and groaned in frustration.

Why was this happening? Peter wondered. Maybe his wires were getting crossed. Peter was straight, he was attracted to girls and girls only. He had the biggest crush on Mary Jane, he had fantasized about her multiple times… he had woken up stuck to his bed sheets because of her for crying out loud! Why was he suddenly feeling these kinds of feelings towards a random dude? Did he want to have sex with him? What would sex even be like with a guy? He shuttered at the thought. No I’m straight, he repeated to himself.  This is probably because I saw Steve and Tony together yesterday and I’m just traumatized or something.

Peter decided it would be best to take a cold shower before starting his homework.

–

The shower cleared Peter’s mind and most importantly cooled his body down. Feeling refreshed, he went up to the common room, covering his eyes to make sure he wasn’t catching anyone in the act again. When the coast was clear, he made his way to the sofa. Perfect reading spot, he thought to himself. He plopped down on the sofa and opened up the book.

He was able to knock out all eight chapters in one sitting. He placed the book down on the coffee table and looked down at his phone. It was 6 pm and he was feeling hungry, he hadn’t eaten since breakfast.

Peter skipped down to the kitchen to find everyone preparing a meal together… this time Steve and Tony were there. Steve glanced up from the boiling pot to give Peter a soft smile. “We’re making spaghetti and meatballs today, old family recipe.” His neck was covered in what looked like small bruises — were they hickeys?

Peter glanced over at Tony, knowing who the culprit was. Tony simply avoided eye contact, “Uh, take a seat, kid, join us.” Yup, Steve was right, Tony’s a coward.

They were all sitting on the bar stools surrounding the island in the middle of the kitchen. “You seem to have some bruises on your neck,” Vision commented on Steve’s situation.

“I think Americans call them hickeys,” Wanda smirked. “Looks like Steve had a visit from a lady friend.”

“Okay, that’s enough, let’s all have some spaghetti,” Steve poured out a plate for everyone before taking his own seat.

“Where’s Natasha?” Peter asked, realizing she was the only one missing.

“She’s a loner, she’ll probably come down later to eat alone,” Steve explained before changing the subject. “Peter, why don’t you tell the group a little about yourself?”

–

Dinner went well. There were laughs and story telling and everyone got to know Peter a little better. He was starting to feel like he was part of the family. Tony remained quiet the whole night…he only spoke up to have someone pass him the wine bottle.

After dinner, they all made their way to the common room to have a few drinks, they even let Peter try a beer but it was too gross for him and he left it unfinished. Steve played Peter at fuseball, beating Peter every time. Tony only talked to the others, avoiding Peter whenever possible. Steve did his best to include him in everything, and mostly kept the conversation around Peter.

Around 10 pm, everyone called it quits, wished Peter a goodnight and made their way to their rooms. Tony and Steve remained behind. It was silent for a few minutes as the three of them stood in the empty room before Tony mustered up the courage to speak up.

“Don’t stay up too late, Wade is coming back tomorrow morning…” Tony warned as he walked towards the elevator.

“You have anything else to say?” Steve asked, stopping Tony in his tracks.

“And…eat your vegetables, they’re good for you,” Tony stepped into the elevator, not looking back, and was gone.

“He’s trying… just give him some time…he’s not good with emotions,” Steve explained. “I’m going to head to bed, let me know if you need anything else.” Steve started walking towards the elevator doors.

“Steve?” Peter gulped. He wanted to ask Steve about the feelings he was having towards Wade and the overall confusion he was going through, but he wasn’t sure how to word it or if Steve was even comfortable talking about it.

“Yes?”

“Nothing — nevermind, have a goodnight.” Peter gave a nervous smile.

Steve stepped into the elevator and gave Peter a slight nod. “Goodnight, Pete.” The doors closed and Peter was left alone in the common room.

–

Peter stayed up watching T.V in the commons, unable to sleep. Wade was still lingering on his mind, he could still smell his cologne, he could still remember those piercing eyes…that perfect smile… he was perfect.

He clicked off the T.V in frustration. Looking at the time, he realized that it was a little after midnight. He decided to head to the kitchen to grab a glass of water before bed.  

He made his way across the quiet building to the kitchen. He put the code in and opened the door before turning on the lights to the kitchen. To his surprise, there was someone rummaging through the fridge.

“Oh sorry I didn’t see you there.” He apologized.

“No problem, just getting a midnight snack,” The red-head stuck her head out from the fridge and walked over to the counter with a tub of ice cream. Peter instantly recognized her.

“You’re Black Widow!” Peter exclaimed.

“Yes, you can call me Nat.” She side-eyed him as she opened up the tub of ice cream and searched for a spoon. She was obviously annoyed with him.

“Nice to meet you, I mean– well – like officially, I’m Pet–”

“I know who you are,” She cut him off as she stuck the spoon into the tub. She brought the spoon up to her mouth and sucked the ice cream off the spoon.

Peter just stared in silence. He just watched as her plump, red lips slid over the spoon. She was gorgeous. These teenage hormones are out of control. Keep it together Peter!

She was in a small black nightgown that left nothing to the imagination. There were little red bows on each strap. Peter could see the outline to her black panties through the gown and could clearly see the outline of her breasts. She was so…curvy…was the only word Peter could use to describe her. Almost a perfect hour-glass, her nice round hips and ass complemented with a small waist. Peter was mesmerized.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer,” She placed the spoon in the sink and placed the tub back in the freezer, placing a sticky note on it.

“I’m sorry — I didn’t mean – I mean–” Peter desperately tried to cover up his groin. Damn puberty! Why do you forsaken me!?

Natasha made her way to Peter, almost gliding across the floor, as if she was walking on a cloud. This was heaven, or maybe one of Peter’s wet dreams, this couldn’t be real.

She stood right in front of him and it took all his willpower to not look down at her body. He focused on her face. Her stern green eyes were staring back into his brown eyes. He gulped.

“You know you’re too young for me, right?” She pushed a strand of red hair away from her face.

“Yeah of course,” Peter’s voice cracked. She licked her lips, drawing Peter’s attention back to them.

“So don’t try anything, or I will kill you,” She warned before leaning forward, pressing her body against Peter’s and whispering into his ear, lips brushing against his earlobe. “I’m a trained assassin you don’t want to mess with, honey.”

Peter’s eyes rolled back and he bit back a moan. Natasha pulled away and made her way towards the door. She looked back one last time, “You might want to change your pants,” she winked as she left the room.

Peter looked down to see the growing stain in the front of his jeans. She was the queen of manipulation. She had completely manipulated him for the fun of it and he had let her get away with it.

Well, he smiled, at least he knew he liked girls after all.

He reached around to grab his phone from his back pocket to check his messages only to find that it was missing. Natasha had stolen his phone. This was just great.

–

Part IV: coming soon

[cedar-woods]

My husband's "man boobs" are killing my sex drive

I know I'm going to get flamed for this because there's a huge double standard in society. That, as a woman I'm not supposed to be visual or have any desires of my own. But I've always been a highly visual and sexual person. I married my husband because of an unplanned pregnancy after two months of dating. I was never physically attracted to him but he was a nice guy, treated me well, and had a good job.

He's not overweight but he's skinny fat. He has a belly and a bit too much fat in the wrong places. His body isn't hard like a man. I can overlook all those things - but he has Gynecomastia and I don't think it's fat, but actual breast tissue. I mean it's not hugely noticeable over a t-shirt (they're quite small) but men shouldn't have any breasts obviously. He's self conscious and keeps his tshirt on during sex but it still bothers me his chest isn't hard muscle like a man.

I'm not turned on by him because his body isn't masculine. It's like my mind doesn't see him as a man. I dont want to "submit" to him for sex because he doesn't inspire respect for him as a man ,in me

I'm constantly craving attention from other men, and even flirting with them to get my thrills. There's a guy at work who makes me wet from just talking to me (6'2", 200 lbs, broad shoulders, hard body, deep voice , basically pure masculinity)

By the way I'm 5'1 and 105 lbs, active, fit and take care of myself. Yes my body isn't perfect, I have some stretchmarks from pregnancy, and my breasts aren't as firm anymore but I'm still feminine.

I think a similar situation if the genders were reversed would be if I had an extremely hairy body with hair in the wrong places like my chest, stomach, etc. Men wouldn't be attracted to me and who would blame them?

submitted by /u/ShallowWife [link] [comments] source https://www.reddit.com/r/sexover30/comments/c2fc8h/my_husbands_man_boobs_are_killing_my_sex_drive/

[sunshinekarliekloss]

Conquering fashion and crushing tech, Karlie Kloss is just getting started

Taking an Australian to an Australian restaurant is a very Karlie Kloss thing to do.

Heartily recommending dishes (green goddess salad! Avocado toast!) and knowing everyone who works at the joint (Two Hands in N.Y.C.’s TriBeCa neighborhood) is also très Karlie Kloss. Almost 10 years in, her modeling career has encompassed more runways than JFK, more covers than a ... cover band, and more campaigns than some presidents (Swarovski, Express, L’Oréal, Adidas). But the St. Louis–raised Kloss remains a Midwestern girl who was brought up right. She’s two years into Kode with Klossy, her 10-city (and growing) program to inspire young girls to learn coding and enter the tech world, and over a year into her feminist studies at NYU (complemented handily by today’s look: a Dior T-shirt that says “We Should All Be Feminists”). But right now she’s just going to extend her illegally long legs under the table for a chat. LAURA BROWN: At the British Fashion Awards in London last December, you were posing away on the red carpet in a sparkly Swarovski thing, and it was freezing. I just thought, “How does she keep turning up and doing that?” KARLIE KLOSS: First of all, I’m a Leo, so when I need to turn it on, I do. I enjoy the adrenaline—not just when I’m walking the red carpet but also when I’m on set or in a runway show or even in the small film things I’ve done. I don’t know; I’m going to throw it to being a Leo because I have no other explanation! But I also know the feeling of being spent. What happens when you’re spent? I book myself out. I take time. I shut off. I don’t post to social media for a couple of days, and I find that to be really rewarding and healthy. It actually reenergizes me to be able to turn it back on and have fun. We’re multitasking women; we all have a lot going on. But you also have to protect yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally and give yourself time. “Book yourself out”: I know that’s a model term, but metaphorically, it’s a good idea too. Yeah. Because you know what? It’s not a matter of being lazy—the returns are tenfold: You’ll be able to show up with more energy, more drive, more focus. It’ll pay off. Are you type A? I don’t know if I’m type A. I’m super-driven, but I’m not a perfectionist. Women are always told we can have it all, but acknowledging your limitations is a wonderful thing too. There’s a beauty in knowing what you can’t do. There’s also a beauty in not trying to figure it all out. Things like Kode with Klossy happened because after graduating from high school, I was fully focusing on my modeling career but at a certain point was uninspired. That’s why I started taking a coding class. When you sat down for that first coding class, did it feel like, “Oh, great!” or “Oh, s—!”? I only got myself into that first coding class because I was genuinely curious about it and I met someone who started the Flatiron School … I am someone who if you tell me I have to do something, I’m less inclined to do it, but I took that class because I was really interested in how all this works. It’s how the world is actually built. Code is the secret language that builds all the digital architecture of everything that we rely on. And pretty much a fraction of people know about it, yet we all use it. I’ve always been intrigued by the direction nobody else is going in. Not following the herd. If anything, the herd is following you, especially when you’re, like, 7 feet in heels. Honestly, I never owned a pair of heels until I became a model. I remember buying a pair of black high heels from Target in St. Louis because I had to practice learning how to walk in them. OK, set the scene for me, please. I had just turned 15—now 18 is the minimum age to model—and started high school on a Monday, and by Friday I was on a plane to New York for a casting call. I thought, “There’s no way anyone is going to book me for New York Fashion Week, but it’s good to go and see people.” I had my high heels from Target and a little black dress from Macy’s that my mom bought me. It became my lucky little black dress that I continued to wear again and again. That was the outfit I was wearing when I walked into Calvin Klein in 2008 and got cast in the show that launched my career. I look back at photos, and I’m like, “How and why did anybody book me?” I was a child! But I was a very tall child. I’ve always been kind of an old soul, I guess.

You’ve always read older. I’m still surprised at how young you are. I really loved those years. And it was so different. The whole digital situation was different. Do you think social media makes it harder or easier to succeed? I think it’s a different ball game. You have to have a strong presence on the runway, schlep around the world to build a book for editorial, work with the right people, and be in the right campaigns. You also have to have a digital presence and brand yourself. Maybe it’s easier to break through now because it’s democratized. It’s not like there are three important people in the fashion industry who are going to say, “Yes, you’re going to be successful.” It’s the people’s choice. Right, and that’s what’s really interesting. Something can become successful if it’s a good idea or if it’s going against the grain. It’s hard to predict. It’s important to have constants in all this, right? How do you manage a relationship with all your travel and everything else? [Kloss dates venture capitalist and health-care entrepreneur Joshua Kushner.] You make it work. We’ve been together almost five years. Time flies. It’s crazy. He’s a super-solid dude. Is it nice to know someone’s there? Yeah. I’ve always been super-close with my family. They are my rock. There’s so much uncertainty in every direction, like, “Are you gonna get this job?” So having a solid crew, whether it’s your family or a partner, that’s a big part of being able to function. What does being a feminist mean to you? Actually, I’m taking a feminism class at NYU right now. It’s about the political history of feminism, really, since the ’60s and ’70s. The term “feminism” means different things to different people; a lot of people throw it around without really understanding the weight of it because it is layered. Two women can identify as feminists and have wildly different ways of living their lives. I love what Maria Grazia [Chiuri] is doing at Dior. She’s such a powerhouse. Having women in leadership positions is so important. Hopefully it will happen in the White House someday. Would you ever consider making a run for the White House? Never say never, right? So, we did a superhero shoot together for InStyle. Who’s your real-life superhero? My mom, for sure. She battled really aggressive breast cancer when my three sisters and I were young. She survived by the skin of her teeth. I’ve grown up completely idolizing her. She’s so strong. Were you ever into superheroes? Wonder Woman, of course! First of all, she’s got great style, hair, and accessories. And I love that she’s fearless. She doesn’t need a man. She’s so independent. Where would you go if you could fly an invisible jet? I would love to be able to fly, period. Being invisible would be amazing. I’m 6'2", so it’s hard to be invisible, but at times I love just being a people-watcher, whether it’s in a café or the places I travel. Do you have days when you’re not recognized? I put on a baseball hat and jeans and a T-shirt and nobody pays attention to me. It’s great. I hope that never changes. Maybe when you hit 25 and get real old. Hopefully I’ll start shrinking too! When was the moment you knew you’d made it in your career? I haven’t hit that moment yet, but when I bought my apartment in New York six years ago, that felt like a major milestone. So you had a mortgage at 18? Yeah. All my friends were, like, just getting their driver’s licenses.

What do you spend your money on? I am very ambitious as an entrepreneur and as a businesswoman, but it doesn’t matter how much money I make. I am frugal. I spend money on experiences. I like to take amazing vacations with my loved ones. I like property. I just bought a beautiful home in St. Louis. That must be wonderful—coming back home with such success. You know what’s crazy? I bought the house I used to babysit in. My only job before modeling was a $6-an-hour babysitting gig, which, by the way, was great. I feel like I have this Cinderella story, and I’m really grateful for it. It was not the path I was anticipating. Anyway, it’s come full circle for me. I always loved that house. What’s something you do every day that would surprise people? Indulge in chocolate in some form. Chocolate is my weakness. It’s my Kryptonite. If you’re really on a bender, what do you do? What’s your “f— it bucket”? Halo Top ice cream. It’s lower in calories. I’ll smash a whole pint. I have a sweet tooth. That’s how Karlie’s Kookies happened, because I love sweets. You’re super-diligent about working out. Do you try to keep it to a certain time every day? I like to work out in the morning and get it out of the way because it changes how I function the rest of the day. I feel more awake and am more aware of what I eat. Since I’m always traveling and in a different place, I started running. I love running in Paris and upstate New York. I also love strength training. If I work out, it doesn’t immediately change my body, but it changes my clarity, focus, and emotions. My job right now is reliant on my body, but that’s genuinely not why I work out. What’s your favorite thing to do? Do you cook a lot at home? I love to cook. I love going to the market and getting fresh stuff and just getting creative. How ambitious are you? I want Kode with Klossy to grow. Last summer we had three camps with 20 girls in each one. This summer we have 15 camps in 10 cities and 20 to 25 girls in each class. All of this and you’re not type A? I’m grateful that I’m successful at 24 in a way that I never imagined I would be. I feel lucky I started working at 15—it’s been almost 10 years. I feel like a geezer! What was the last thing you bought for yourself? I bought this sick handpainted Gucci leather jacket. It was from a special collaboration. My frugal self broke the bank on that one. And also the house. [Laughs] What’s your favorite thing that you’ve worn out lately? It was this cute little Dior sleeveless dress that was just way sexy and athletic. I loved it. Most important, where are the Target shoes now? My mom has the first crayon drawing I ever made, so I’m sure those shoes are in a box somewhere in the Kloss attic. (x)