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letorip · 1 day

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hiiii! i loved reading “somethin’ stupid”, and I wanted to make a request for it. Not sure if it’s discontinued or not, but what abt reader when everything has healed and them being super insecure of their scars. Maybe getting bullied or harassed for them? And Wednesday comforting them, even though it’s not her thing + reassurance that she’ll always love them, no matter what. Ty for listening to my rant. :)

somethin’ stupid [iii]

“the time is right, your perfume fills my head, the stars get red and oh, the night so blue”

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pairing: wednesday addams x reader

summary: wednesday reminds you she loves you with an unending passion, even with the scars that you now wear for her.

warnings: mentions of bullying, body insecurities, percy hynes white the rat man himself existing, explicit words ig? if you can't handle cuss words idk what to tell you

word count: 3.9k

A/N: timeline a bit altered, there's about a week left before you return home for the summer, and xavier gives her the phone with this week left. thoughts are in red. i don’t usually accept requests from people but this was just too adorable to pass up, especially with the new season starting production. it kind of got away from me, in terms of length, but it was fun to write. next out will hopefully be the lottie matthews fic that i’ve been talking up

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Scars were remarkable things. The way they stretched along the skin of your arms and right up almost to the tips of your fingers, or branched along the bridge of your nose and twisted along your jaw, it was as if a tree of your life was etched fundamentally into you, and Wednesday was transfixed.

It didn’t matter how many times she traced her fingers over the paths— two fingers, gentle, watching your nose twitch with every curve— she still thought they were, that you were breathtaking to look at.

“Wednesday, that tickles,” you hummed softly, eyes still closed. She frowned, tugging her hands away abruptly and raising her eyebrows at you.

“I was unaware you were awake," she said.

You lifted one eye open, smiling when you saw her, and though she would have still rather died than admit it, the gesture held a great, mystical power over her.

The skylight overhead leaked morning light into the room, flushing itself against the walls and beaming gently down, over your cheeks. It felt nice everywhere except for the new slashes that were still healing, and you rolled over, away from her to sit up on the edge of your bed and get out of the uncomfortable heat that pressed on those delicate places.

"How did you get in?" you asked, stretching out your arms and wincing a bit at the uncomfortable tightness. "You weren't here when I went to bed."

She watched you go, leaning back on the scratchy, woollen armchair next to your bed and shoving the stack of comic books already there to the side. “Your roof has a window, and I’m a very good climber. You should lock that, by the way.”

You turned to her and raised your eyebrows, looking miffed, but disgustingly adorable. “You could’ve just texted me, you know. I would’ve let you use the door.”

“And use that phone Xavier gave me? Believe me, I’d rather not,” she rolled her eyes with disgust, thinking about the interaction and how it took up time of her life that she'd never get back.

“You’d better, actually,” you said, turning to her with a smile and then wandering over to the set of drawers in the corner, clothes thrown all over the floor. Your whole room in general was a mess, largely from the bottles of medication and knocked over piles of books and things. It had been a rather stressful endeavour to get you up the stairs and comfortably inside, when you were still in your casts and there wasn’t an elevator.

“Why?” Wednesday challenged, watching you. She herself was already in her uniform, but she watched as you moved in your white pyjama t-shirt, the fresh scars almost dancing with your arms as they moved while you walked.

You grabbed a white button down out from the top one, shaking it a bit to get out a few wrinkles. “Because you’re sure as hell texting with me over summer break.” You shrugged, taking the shirt with you and walking behind the dividing screen you had next to your wardrobe. “That was nice of him to do for you, actually.” Your shirt went flying over the divider, landing on the ground.

Wednesday rolled her eyes. “You’re too kind to him. The snivelling rat only gave it to me so I would feel obligated to text him.” She could hear you rustling around behind the screen, messing about with your clothes. “Besides, why use the phone when I can visit you in person? Are you so braindead you need to rely on your phone for communication?”

The small noises stopped abruptly, and when you didn’t reply to that for a minute, Wednesday furrowed her eyebrows, standing up in her heavy boots that thudded against the creaky old wood of your floor. “What is it?” she asked, stepping forward towards the screen. You had made a fool of her with how much you made her worry, but she still desperately needed to know what was going on inside your head. She needed to be sure that you were okay.

She expected to see you have tripped maybe, or you had somehow collapsed into a pile of clothes and drifted back off to sleep, but the reality was a bit more mollifying. You were on the other side, just standing there with your button down shirt open in front of the mirror. You didn't say anything for a while, staring into it with a frown.

The scars over your stomach were perhaps the deepest, with raw, pinkish impressions still pressed into them and greenish-yellow bruises around the edges that were still straggling to heal up. The lines criss-crossed over your skin and up your chest, ending at the peaks of your shoulders that the white button down draped over. “They look bad on me,” you said, quietly.

She didn't particularly know what to say, watching your eyes continue to stare with a rigid dislike back at yourself. To get her to comfortably lean on you had been quite the effort, and now that you were officially together she was still becoming used to saying she loved you or kissing your skin whenever she so felt like it.

“They look like scars,” Wednesday replied. “The bruising will heal and the redness will fade, and-”

“But they won’t go away.” You said it with a flat disappointment. Wednesday blinked, confused by how you spoke of them. Were you unaware just how magnificent they looked upon you? The thought was vexing, and Wednesday was unsure what it was she could say to ease your mind, so she chose to say nothing at all.

You did the buttons up quickly, tugging on the collar to stand as tall as possible. It covered most of the scarring, but one could still see wisps of hurt skin on your hands and cuts across your face and jaw— Wednesday liked that one especially. You didn't seem to like any of them.

"We're going to be late to breakfast," she said, leaning with her arms crossed against the wardrobe. You shrugged again, going to grab your trousers.

"Go without me."

This caused her great pause. You were never one to miss breakfast. It was probably one of the most consistent ways someone could find you if they needed to. "It's your first day back," she argued. "And you're still recovering."

You rolled your eyes but smiled as you messed with the button of your pants, and it relaxed her a little bit, if the Addams could. "I'll survive without breakfast for a day, Wednesday. I need to get ready for class."

She narrowed her eyes at you. "Then I can survive without breakfast, too." You straightened up, sending her a look as you buttoned your trousers. You entirely knew the game that she was playing. The game she was winning, too.

"You can go without me."

"But I won't," she replied. You narrowed your eyes, grabbing some socks.

"Fine."

She glared right back, but not in an angry way. Just to let you know she was serious. "Fine." You rolled your eyes, stalking over, now that you were clothed and planting a gentle kiss on her lips. She leaned into it, hands coming up to cup your cheeks. Her thumbs brushed over the sensitive skin there.

"You win," you conceded, pulling away and looking down at her with a smile.

"I always do," she said, looking up at you with a shine in her dark eyes.

===+++===

I guess (Y/n) is back.

Oh my god, the rumours were true.

Jeeeesus Christ, that kid's face.

The thoughts flitted past you like passing trains as you walked to the quad, loud and unfiltered noise in the back of your mind that acted as a constant reminder of the new skin you wore. You wore them for her, the short girl walking next to you, but even with her right by your side, it was like she was a million miles away.

That must've hurt, holy hell.

They stared, the people you passed, watching you with a weird half-shock, half-pity, their thoughts running wild. The worst ones imagined the scenario for themselves, and within their heads you saw a dozen different replays in different ways of you getting absolutely torn apart.

How are you still alive???

Fucking jumpscare...

That was about all it took before you shut off your noise completely. Maybe for once, it was better not to know what other people were thinking. You sent a glance to Wednesday, who was walking next to you with her eyes facing ahead. When you felt the people still staring, you frowned, bumping her with your hand. You needed her to hold it very, very badly.

But she sent you a look, shaking her head once as if to say 'not here.' You knew Wednesday didn't like PDA of any sort. She still struggled sometimes to wrap her arms around your shoulders or pull you in by your waist. It wasn't natural, but you still couldn't help feeling a little bit disappointed. The imaginary distance between you both widened, right then, and other kids' staring felt amplified by ten.

Suddenly, a colourful blur came bounding across the quad and right down the hall, straight for you. "Enid— Enid, wait—" Enid tackled you in a tight hug, squeezing you against her with an unrestrained excitement and trying to shake you like a rag doll, it felt like.

"Oh my god! You're back! Oh. My. God!" She screamed, beaming from ear to ear, pulling away to look at you for a second before going right back to hugging you tightly.

You grit your teeth from the discomfort of pressure being placed on the delicate skin, but made no move to pull away, and instead did your best to smile through it. A hug felt nice. It was the warmth you needed in a place that was being so cold to you at the moment. Enid didn't care what marks you had.

"Enid, down," Wednesday said firmly, watching the exchange and carefully monitoring your expression. She had caught your grimace, sending you a wary look and crossing her arms, subtly trying to make sure you were okay. You sent her a quick nod, and Enid gently pulled away.

"Sorry," she said, wincing at realising her mistake. The expression only lasted a second though, before she was right back to smiling at you. "Wait, we're scar buddies!"

You laughed. It had been the first time you felt good about them since finding Wednesday tracing them while you slept. "We definitely are."

Enid's were a bit more healed than yours, blending better into the skin than those that protruded from the bridge of your nose and sloped down into your cheek. You saw yours and thought 'ugly'; you saw Enid's and thought nothing. But you would take it either way.

The girl grabbed your arm, tugging you harshly forwards and dragging you towards your usual table. "You have to see Yoko. Her and Divina were worried sick about you." You sent Wednesday back a look as Enid dragged you, and she shrugged, watching you go, not that she'd be able to do much to stop her.

By the time she had comfortably strolled over to the table, Enid had already dragged you into a seat, and was brightly recounting everything you had missed. Wednesday had already done so, when you were still in the hospital recovering, but you let her continue to talk. It felt nice. Like everything was back to normal for once. She slid down next to you, not saying anything.

Divina and Yoko were being nice about your scars. They kept on trying to brush past it, like nothing was wrong, but you knew when they looked at your face, it was the first thing to catch their eyes every time.

"Are you excited to be back?" Yoko asked from behind her sunglasses, leaning against Divina's shoulders.

"Making up the homework I missed out on? Super thrilled," you said dryly, putting your elbows on the table and leaning on them as you partook in the conversation.

"Well, everyone's missed you," said Divina, trying to smile, but her eyes shifted down quickly, to look at your hands and the cuts upon them before back up to you. "We're all happy you're okay."

You sent her what was supposed to be a smile, but by the look Wednesday shot at you, it probably looked a bit more like a grimace. Could you even call this 'okay?' This wasn't being okay. Being okay would've meant you looked the same as you did before, and that wouldn't happen. It had been permanently taken from you.

"So what are you all doing, for summer?" you threw out the question, more as a way to change the subject, and it was successful. Enid lit up like a Christmas tree, super excited to share about a trip she was taking to see her extended family. It wasn't that you didn't care, but you stopped for a moment, realising this was the happiest you had been in a while. At a table with your friends, and Wednesday next to you. Of course, that was when it was immediately ruined.

From behind Enid, you could see Xavier spot Wednesday and similarly light up, bounding over with a smile.

"And then we're going to the beach with my baby little cousins, and—"

"Wednesday!" he called out to her, interrupting Enid and looking across the table at the girl. Her hand crept up to your knee, placing itself firmly, in a way that told you she was dreading his presence. He looked around at you all, spotting you and failing to hide his disappointment at your return. Xavier quickly glanced back to Wednesday. "Did you get my text?" He asked, smiling again.

Wednesday stared back, unimpressed. "I did. I ignored it."

"Oh," his face dropped. "Well, I wanted to ask if you would tutor me on botany."

She blinked. "There's a week left of school."

"I know," Xavier shrugged. "But we have that end of year quiz on Wednesday."

"I would rather watch Legally Blonde." You had to stop yourself from laughing at that one. You had been the one to show that to her, and she spent the entire duration looking horrified.

"We could do that, then," he offered, and you suddenly realised you had been too nice to him in terms of pursuing Wednesday. Most people knew by now, that you two were officially together, not that it had been much of a secret, even when you were just hooking up. It was rather insane for his pursuit to continue, when you were right there.

"Xavier, I think me and Wednesday are busy, for at least the next couple days," you said, trying to let him down easy. He sent you a glare, before looking back at Wednesday like she would have a different response. She stared back, maintaining her deadpan expression, but squeezing your knee softly as if to say 'thank you.'

He frowned. "Fine. See you in fencing, (Y/n)." You smiled back at him, figuring maybe things were good now. Wednesday sent you a wary glance.

God, you couldn't have been more wrong.

===+++===

Wednesday Addams stormed through the halls of Nevermore with a fire under her feet and a rage in her heart. She pushed through the groups of people, storming up the stairs and down the corridors like she was about to explode. And she truly was.

When she arrived at your door, she was knocking heavily, small fist pounding on the wood with fury.

"(Y/n). Open the door."

No response. It was just about as quiet as it had been that morning, when she had caught you staring at yourself. It filled her with an unmatched worry, sending her back to the night when she had seen those red and blue police lights and thought she had lost you forever. "Open the door." She demanded again, pressing her ear up to it.

"Go away, Wednesday," you said from the other side. It was muffled, but she could still make out the pain in your voice.

"(Y/n), let me in. Now." It was practically a plea at that point, and she cursed you for bringing her to this place of utter weakness for you. "Either you let me in yourself, or I let myself in," Wednesday said, firmly speaking to you with her head against the door. She needed to know you were okay. It came first, right before the rage she felt for Xavier, and she so needed to know that you were still there— still hers to keep.

You didn't say anything though, choosing to continue to stay quiet in your room. Wednesday sighed, grabbing a hairpin from her pocket and reaching for the lock.

She got the door open in less than thirty seconds out of habit, pushing it open gently and letting herself in before she rushed over to you. You didn't even look at her, instead continuing to stare out the window and the sunny day, clouds floating by as if nothing were different. It felt out of place, now.

The part of your face away from the window was covered by the dark of your room. You hadn't even bothered to turn the lights on, sitting in the dark. She used to like the dark, but it felt out of place for you to be hiding in it.

"Look at me," Wednesday said, standing in front of your armchair. Her hand went to your chin, gently tilting your face up. There was a bandage right there, on your forehead, over what could only be a giant cut.

"Who told you what happened?" you asked quietly, your eyes a bit misty. You weren't a usual crier, and it made her uneasy to see just how much of an effect his actions had had on you.

"Yoko. It's about the only time that idiotic phone came in handy. I came as soon as I heard. He's not supposed to start mach when you're not wearing your helmets. Mark my words, I'll curse him until the end of time." It didn't seem to comfort you like it usually did, the pain in your eyes only worsening.

"Do you know what he said, when he cut me?"

She blinked in confusion. "He said 'Frankenstein, I'll give you one to match the others'," you finished, looking her in the eyes for the first time since she had entered the room.

"He's an asshole, I told you," she said, trying to stop you, but you jerked away from her touch for the first time.

"It's not just him. Wends, I see it all the time." Your voice broke a little bit, and you stopped to swallow before continuing. It hurt her heart, as if she was being left to die again in that crypt. "In people's heads, from their mouths, in the mirror. It replays like a fucking movie. I keep seeing myself almost die, and I'm starting to think it would've been better if I had."

No. That was enough. She firmly grabbed your chin again, eyes glinting with violence at the offensive proposition. "Never say that sentence ever again, or else."

"He's got a point though, doesn't he?" you said it slowly, your scarred hand reaching out to her arm and wrapping around her wrist. She flinched at the contact but did not pull away. "I'll never be the same 'me' as I was before. There's something— I'm wrong. And you know it, too. That's why you won't touch me when others are around. It's not me."

Wednesday stared at you for a long moment, as you began to cry. Then her hands went to your cheeks again, just as they had earlier, gently cupping your face in her hands, as if you were the world, because you were. You were her world. "You're an idiot. It appears I've failed to make myself clear."

"What do you mean?" Your eyebrows furrowed.

"Your simple mind fails to realise why I'm even here," she said, and then she leaned forward, clambering up into your lap and resting her forehead on yours. Wednesday had become accustomed to, and rather fond of, making a home there. She was far from the greatest at expressions, but she wanted to make you realise the obvious and that was more than enough motivation to try. "I'm here because I burn for you, down to my core and back up again."

"But I'm not me, not with these—" But you were interrupted by her hand, sliding up to cover your mouth.

"Hush, idiot. You are the same you as before, and I wouldn't stop loving you for anything. I have loved you for all you were before and all you are now. I would have loved you if the damage was worse, and I would still yearn for you if you had died. It makes no difference, (Y/n), you fool. You're still you, and you're still as... captivating as the first time I saw you and wanted you in my possession."

Her hand came to your cheek again, stroking gently the skin there and feeling all the ridges under her thumb. "You've placed a cruel curse on me, as if you don't already know yourself. I am indefinitely, irrevocably yours. My refusal to touch you in public is a personal discomfort, but one I'll...overcome, if it means that much to you. Even if I am not touching you, you must assume I want to, because I do."

She brushed a stray tear away, wiping it on your jacket, and your hands came up to wrap around her waist, tugging her against you like you were afraid she would melt through your fingers. "Are you aware of how I was almost killed, in the crypt, when fighting Crackstone?"

You shook your head. "You don't like to talk about it," you mumbled, burying your head in her chest. Her hands went to your hair, lightly scratching at your scalp.

"It was an...incredibly confusing dilemma. I used to patiently await death. My family and I hold it with a special regard. But as I was dying, I only felt lonely. Do you know why?"

You frowned against her, shaking your head again. Wednesday scoffed. "The obvious answer is you. It would be leaving without you. And as obnoxious as it is, I don't want to. Today, tomorrow, forever; I want to do it with you."

You sat there for a moment, thinking to yourself, and then you nodded. It was slow, but it was there, and when Wednesday felt it, she sat back to look you in the eyes. "Are we clear?" She demanded. If you said no, she would only double down. But instead, you nodded again, looking up at her. She held your heart in her hands.

"Okay."

"Okay?"

You leaned forward, kissing her with the most passion you ever had, and Wednesday only returned it, cupping your neck and leaning into you. She would crawl into your skin, if she could. She'd build a little birdhouse in your soul, if she could find a way. You pulled away again, after a long minute, nodding again. "Okay. Same."

She blinked. "Same? I spill my heart to you and you respond with 'ditto'?" You laughed and she rolled her eyes, attempting to get off your lap. But your arms came up, entrapping her there and holding her close.

"You've put it perfectly. I want you forever, too." And so she melted into your embrace again, hand going to your scars to trace them and you nuzzling into her hand. It was a while, before either of you spoke.

"We have to get him back, forever, this time," Wednesday said, cold and calculating.

"Agreed."

About two days later, you watched in absolute delight as Xavier ran down the hall in his bathroom towel, a poisonous snake trailing behind him and half of his head shaved completely bald. Call it an ode of Wednesday's love.

===+++===

this was fun! i'm unsure of where to, if i do at all, take somethin' stupid from here. this won't be the only wednesday fic, so unless you all have more ideas, this may be it for this series. anyways, cheers!

#wednesday addams #jenna ortega x reader #jenna ortega #wednesday x reader #wednesday addams x reader #jenna ortega x you #jenna ortega imagine #wednesday netflix

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lazyjellyfish300 · 2 days

Text

Nanami Kento helping you with your daddy issues by spoiling you

CW: MINORS DNI, SMUT(cunnilingus, p in v, pregnancy and breeding mention, crying during sex) AFAB!READER, fluff, angst, daddy issues

A/N: all the things I wanna do today w him instead of being sad about my dad LOL

WC: 1k

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Nanami knows today is a difficult day for you. So he'll take your phone, change the TV channels, do whatever he can to treat it like any other day. Remove any triggers that might provoke painful memories on this holiday that unfortunately was far from celebratory. Rather, a day that reminded you that the first man who was supposed to love you was actually the first man to break your heart.

First and foremost, a bouquet of your favorite flowers from him will be in the middle of the kitchen counter, freshly cut stems in a shimmery crystal vase with a handwritten card and spoken words of love murmured into the nape of your neck.

If you love breakfast and brunch, he'll make reservations for that quaint yet upscale cafe you love, waking you bright and early with some passionate head then a peaceful wash in the shower, dressing you in a flowy sundress he picked out beforehand that matches his dress shirt, holding your hand with the other on the small of your back where a little bit of skin is exposed, goosebumps dotting your spine as he pulls you closer to his chest as he walks, occasionally leaving a little stray kiss in your hair as he casually shows you off.

If you love picnics, he'll pack one with all your favorite things you like to eat in the summertime along with a blanket and maybe some books or art supplies so you can do some watercolor painting or quiet reading. Or you'll just lay with your head in his lap with your full belly while he traces little shapes on your cheek, lowly humming while wispy clouds hang above you. Later, going on a peaceful, scenic drive in the country with no destination and endless, deep conversation.

If you like to go out, then he'll take you to one of the more upscale restaurants in town with an outdoor patio or waterfront, buying you as many fancy drinks as you'd like, holding your hand across the table.

"Of course you can get an appetizer and dessert, darling. Whatever you feel in the mood for, you tell me, okay?"

And he'll take you shopping. Even though Kento normally would sweat at the sight of letting you go crazy with his credit card, this occasion is a special one, spoiling you with clothes and stuffed animals and rings, or maybe some of your favorite treats from the candy shop and whatever your little heart desires. He's just there to swipe his card and make his darling happy.

"Sure you don't want that necklace, honey?" He murmurs as his lips lightly brush behind your ear.

"Think it'd look much prettier on you than the mannequin."

And who are you to say no to that?

Or, if you prefer lazy days, then the entire day will be spent between the sheets and under the covers in Kento's huge bed, his strong body wrapped around you, absentmindedly stroking your shoulder, while you listen to the steady thrummings of his heart, smothering you in endless cuddles.

"M' hungry Ken..."

"Yeah, angel? Okay, let me make us some coffee and breakfast sandwiches. No, no, darling...just me. You just lay there, alright?"

You sigh as you roll over, Kento smirking as he pulls the fluffy comforter over your chin, admiring how adorable you look all curled up. You feel guilty he's doing so much for you, but if you really want to help,

"How about you choose a movie for us to watch dear?"as he slides you the remote. "Pick anything you want while I handle breakfast, okay?"

And so you lay in his bed still in your pajamas, flipping through your options as the delicious, cozy, inviting aroma of fresh brewing coffee and piping hot breakfast starts to fill the air.

And later, after you're nice and full he'll take naps with you laying on his chest until you wake up sometime randomly in the middle of the afternoon. No timeline either of you are running on, only thing to do is get lost in a world of soft pillows, messy hair, comfy pajamas, rich coffee, and each other.

If you wake up horny all you have to do is ask and Kento's more than happy to make you cum on his cock or his tongue as many times as you need.

His strong hands gripping your plush thighs, groaning and leaning back for a better look with a cheeky smirk on his face at his eager baby who wants to take charge of things and ride him so badly just to say thank you for all the special attention he's given you, before the alluring sight of your bouncing tits is just too damn hard to resist and he's harshly pounding his thick cock into you from below, giving his sweetheart all the dirty loving you're so hungry for.

But after fucking you like a whore he'll go back to making love, spending lingering, seemingly mind numbing moments between your thighs, molding and swirling and flicking his tongue against the velvet of your walls and hearing all of your soft pretty moans you're so sweetly making,

"Fffuck... all for me, darling?"

Drowning in your bewitching nectar that runs down his pretty face in sinful streaks, fondling your beautiful breasts with tender caress and not a single inch of your warm skin un-etched in loving kisses he lays on you from head to toe.

Slowly taking his time, pumping you so full and perfectly and deep with his cock you can't help but cry. He holds you and whispers adoring words against your skin, chasing both your highs with cooing words of praise, silk tawny of his enchanting eyes pulling you in as he affectionately nuzzles the tip of his nose against yours.

No, Nanami can't make all the pain go away, but, for damn certain he'll spend the whole day in this bed loving you, giving all of himself over to you.

Now that you're dating him, Father's Day is all about you, until the day you're ready and he'll gladly fill you up with his cum whenever you wanna make him a daddy, giving you as many cute, chubby, babies as you'll let him because all self control goes out the window when he lays eyes on your pretty breasts full of milk and your belly full of his babies.

Even though the first man in your life failed you, he'll make goddamn sure he's the last.

-----

@1-900-venusluvs @thatone-writer

#jjk smut #jjk fluff #kento nanami #nanami headcanons #nanami kento smut #nanami kento x you #nanami kento x reader #nanami smut #kento smut #kento x reader #nanami x you #jujutsu nanami #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen nanami #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jjk nanami #nanami kento #nanami x reader

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pedriscroquettes · 3 days

Text

𝐈𝐌𝐀𝐍 ✮ PEDRI

summary. your boyfriend loves you more than yesterday but less than tomorrow.

warnings. none just pure fluff. i’m so glad my starboy is back.

gabri speaks! listened to iman by maria becerra and it’s so pedri coded. had to write this immediately.

the herd of sweaty players heading through the tunnel to their respective locker rooms was a surreal sight. this was the biggest assignment you had gotten in the three years of you working for a sports journalism column. obviously you knew your boyfriend had a hand in the big step and often received sly remarks from the coworkers you had never gotten along with because of it. luckily for you, you had never been one to undermine yourself or listen to the comments of others.

there was also your boyfriend who would constantly read your pieces out loud and compliment you on your endless knowledge of the sport and plethora of creative words. it was like having your own personal editor. you yearned for the nights before his breaks where the two of you would cozy up in front of the tv revising your works in progress.

“why can’t you ever write about me like this? actually why can’t you write about me period?” he would whine with his flushed cheeks making a special appearance.

“i don’t write about you because they only have me covering the scandinavian leagues.” you said matter-of-factly.

“just tell them you’re dating me.” he would always say.

you never did but with the spanish press it was inevitable that your relationship would see the light of day. your world had flipped instantly and you found yourself on the next flight to germany. it took you a lot of reassuring words to help you understand that you deserved to be there. your boyfriend didn’t write your pieces for you, you did, you were the important figure. so, there you stood with a mic patiently waiting for the player you’d be interviewing to show up.

your co-worker had failed to mention who you’d be interviewing which had you scrambling for various questions to ask. you were fortunate to have an extensive vocabulary for different positions so you were sure that no matter who you’d be talking to your manage to make them comfortable. when you’re met with incredibly pink cheeks you realize why your cameraman was so giddy on the walk towards the tunnel. they were making you interview your own boyfriend.

“live in one!” your cameraman yells loud enough for everyone to hear.

“you’re such a dick!” you quietly scold pedri who’s currently smirking at you.

“you wouldn’t have done it if you knew.” he shrugged and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes because it was true.

you notice the cameraman counting down from three and quickly regain your composure. it’s fascinating for your boyfriend seeing how well you hide your affection for him. this is the first time he’s ever seen you in action and it’s quite mesmerizing the way the lights make you glow and how well you speak. somehow with all the chaos surrounding you two and the sweat dripping off his forehead you’re more beautiful than ever. it must be because you’re in your element he thinks.

“croatia has really done a great job of keeping the ball outside their box, do you think you guys will be able to break through?” you move the mic towards him waiting for an answer.

“of course i mean my connection with rodri is just working super for well for us i think we’ll be able to advance through the midfield more in the second half. modric will not make it easy but that’s why we’re here, to stop him.” he pants.

“lamine has been excellent throughout the first half how do you plan on using him to improve the play?” you scramble to say as time is running out.

“well lamine is excellent with the ball i think he’ll able to get us far into their zone. it’s really a team effort. he’s probably ecstatic right now and that’ll definitely help us.” he answers.

“thank you pedri. good luck in the second half.” your words contain honesty and you give him the most sincere smile.

“thank you, hermosa.” he compliments you on live television.

you want nothing more than to slap him but his hands around your hips take you by surprise. his lips are so close to yours and you immediately forget the camera is still rolling. it’s a quick peck but it’s a kiss nothing less. it’s your turn to display your flushed cheeks. in the blink of an eye he’s gone and you’re left alone to deal with the aftermath. you hear your coworkers tease you through your earpiece and the cameraman is currently laughing at you. you’re quick to redirect to the anchors back at headquarters. that night you and pedri make headlines for your performance in the tunnel.

#iker casillas totally did not inspire this #pedri x reader #pedri imagine #pedri fic #football imagine #football fic #gabri writes

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tonguepiercedanyway75 · 2 days

Text

Phone call - Matty Healy

18+ mdni matty is away and you thought you’d surprise him with a toy, which he gladly uses while being on the phone with you

contant warning: phone sex, male and female masturbation, sex toys, dirty talk

You’re jolted awake by the insistent buzzing of your phone on the nightstand. Groggy and confused, you reach for it, squinting at the screen. It’s 3 a.m., and Matty’s name flashes, making your heart race.

“Hello?” you mumble, your voice thick with sleep.

“Hey, love,” Matty’s voice comes through, warm and teasing, his British accent a comforting lilt in the quiet of the night.

“Matty? It’s 3 a.m. What’s up?” you ask, trying to clear the fog from your mind.

“Well, I was going through my bag, and I found something interesting,” he says, and you can practically hear the smirk in his voice.

It takes you a moment, but then you remember. Your heart skips a beat as you sit up in bed. “Oh, you found the note?”

“Yeah,” he replies, chuckling. “It said ‘Call me before you open x’. So, here I am, calling you at this ungodly hour.”

You smile nervously. You actually bought him a sex toy, hoping for him to feel good when he’s gone for a long time. Hoping he’ll use it and call you every time he does. You feel giddy thinking about his reaction.

“Should I open it now?”

“Go ahead,” you say, feeling a mix of excitement and embarrassment. “I’m dying to know what you think.”

You hear the crinkling of paper as he unwraps the package. The suspense is killing you, and you imagine him sitting there, a mischievous grin on his face as he uncovers your gift.

After seconds he didn’t say anything you think you fucked up. “Matty?”

“Blimey,” he says finally, his tone a mix of surprise and delight. “You really went for it, didn’t you?”

“Well, I didn’t want you to be too lonely on your trip,” you tease, a smile tugging at your lips.

He chuckles, “what the fuck, Bluetooth-controlled male masturbator,” he reads out, and you burst into giggles. “Haven’t used a fleshlight since I was 16 or some shit.”

“Fleshlight with vibrator,” you correct him.

There is lube in the box as well because you didn’t know if he had some with him, very unlikely actually.

“You’re a menace,” he says, opening the box to pull the toy out. “You actually bought me a sex toy.”

You picture him with it in his hand, imagining how badly he wants to fuck it, but he pulls himself together. He’s definitely half hard right now, sitting on his bed. You’re getting wetter with every second as well, squeezing your thighs together because this is supposed to be about him.

“I did, and I’ve set everything up so you just need to use lube and turn it on.” You hum, laying on your back with your legs bend. Only in some panties and a shirt of Matty.

“Oh, so you want me to use it now?” He teases, grinning into the phone.

You think about the question for a second. It’s his choice if he wants to have some fun but you do want to listen to him.

“Yes.”

Matty groans, fiddling with his belt, squeezing his bulge over his pants. “You’ve got a toy as well, right?”

You nod even though he can’t see you, “yeah.”

“Go on and get it f’me.”

You turn to your bedside table, pulling out your purple vibrator. “Got it,” you say.

“Perfect,” he says. “Give me a minute, just sit there and be my patient girl.”

His praise goes straight to your core, a rather uncomfortable ache between your legs. You hear shuffling across the room.

Matty pulls his shirt over his head as he also gets rid of his jeans, leaving him in his impossibly tight boxers. “Tell me what you’re wearing.”

“Your shirt and panties.” You breath, lifting your shirt a little, so you can rest your hand on your bare skin.

“Bra?” He asks, plopping down onto the bed, his hand stroking him over his cock.

“No bra,” you answer, hand trailing up, your fingers ghosting over your hardened nipples. You hiss at the cold feeling.

Biting his lower lip to contain his moans, Matty jerks dick for a bit, before his hands go down to play with his balls. Small beads of pre-cum danced at the tip of his cock and he uses them to better and more smoothly stroke himself. “Wish I could see you right now.”

He closes his eyes, hissing through his teeth as he pictures you, naked with him, begging to be fucked.

“Touch yourself, love,” he says, picking up the fleshlight, “I’m gonna use your little gift now.”

He grabs the lube from his bag and lathers some onto his fingers. Parting the folds, he sticks his slick fingers into the hole and spreads the lube around, quite impressed at how lifelike and real it feels.

Having made it sufficiently slick, Matty doesn’t hesitate to place the toy right over his cock and slowly plunge into it. He throws his head back and moans at the feeling, the tightness of the wet walls around his cock excruciating.

“Oh, christ.” He pulls up the toy before plunging it back down, ready to fuck it mercilessly when his attention is suddenly diverted to your little moans.

You’re starting to rub your clit over your panties in a circular motion, Matty’s sounds compared to the sounds of the toys making you so horny.

“How does it feel?” You ask, “turn it on.”

Matty does as you say and he surprises himself with how loudly he moans.

“Fuck,” he grits out, fucking his hips forward. “Oh, fuck.”

“How does it feel?” You ask again.

“Fuckin’ good,” is all he can say. Now that you’re talking, now that he can hear the breathiness of your voice and the buzz of your vibrator in the background he can barely keep himself from coming apart. “So fuckin’ good, baby. Want you so fuckin’ bad. Feels so good. Want to press this up against your pussy and show you what it feels like.” he growls.

“Yeah? God,” you moan, dipping your fingers down your panties to spread the wetness around your pussy. You pull your panties down your legs and throw them away. “You sound so hot doing that.”

Matty is leaning back against the headboard. Lube is all over the toy, leaking out onto the soft curls between his legs and balls. He glides the toy up and down his length at a steady pace trying not to cum so soon already. His mind races with vivid thoughts of you.

“What do you think about Matty?”

He pulls his cock almost all the way out of the toy only to slam it back down hard causing him to groan loud.

Biting his lip to stifle another moan.

“Thinkin' about you squeezing around me." He breathes heavily in your ear. "Wishing this was your pussy instead of some..F-fucking toy.

Sinking his cock back inside making a loud schlick noise you can faintly hear in the phone. Pumping his cock while his other hand runs along his abdomen. He's trying to balance the phone between his shoulder and cheek praying he doesnt drop it. His face and chest flushed a crimson red. He lets out a loud moan when he thrusts upward. "Good god.”

You bite down on your lip hard listening as he fucks himself while talking about you. You want to touch yourself so badly.

“Need a m-minute, jesus,” he pulls the toy off of his soaked, angry red cock. “Can’t focus on anything when I’m fucking this, need to focus on you, can’t neglect my girl.”

You whimper which makes him laugh.

"I want you grab that toy and put it to your clit. Can you do that f’me?" He gets his voice low again. You bring the vibrator to your sensitive bud and gasp when you feel the vibrations.

"Good girl, think of my lips wrapped around your clit sucking so so softly. Imagine my face buried between your legs.." He's breathing heavier into the mic, tempted to let the toy sink down again.

However you struggle with making yourself come and especially over phone, he knows it.

“I bet you’re so wet, fuckin’ dripping down your thighs.”

You sink further into your bed as the vibrator continues working on your clit. Your hips bucking up as you writhe on your blanks, taking in every word he spoke. The phone keeps falling from your ear the more relaxed you become. Your mind in a fog while you listen to him say the dirtiest things.

“C’mon, baby, use your fingers now like I do it.”

You keep the vibrator right where it is at while you gently bring two fingers to your entrance. You slide them between your wet folds, getting them covered in your juices. You bite your lower lip hard as you tease around your dripping pussy.

You hear him groan in the other end of the phone. You gently dip your two fingers inside you, getting them as deep as they possibly could go. "Matty, fuck.” You moan in his ear.

“That’s it, find your pace yeah?” You whine, saying his name again, “feel good?”

“So good,” you moan, your fingers hitting your spot over and over while your vibrator is stimulating your clit.

Matty takes the toy and sinks it down onto his cock, letting out a gravely moan. “Fuck, bless you for giving me this.”

His cock is steadily plunging in out of his toy in a brutal pace. He's getting closer to his release, his other hand moving to cup his balls mimicking how you massage them. His hips thrusting up and all you can hear is the squelching sound his cock is making in the toy.

“Fuckin’ hell, baby, c’mon fuck yourself faster.”

"Miss you so much," you slur, your movements stuttering as the device works your body in ways you didn't know is possible.

“Miss you too.”

You are completely dazed, his sentences barely making their way through the fog as you'd like them to. You are crying, you think, hot and relentless tears carving a path down your face as you fuck yourself harder.

“Good girl,” he groans, “M’so close, fuck- can’t last in this.”

He flips over on his knees and lets himself fuck into the toy, the vibrations sending him into a different plane as his cock throbs, sticky come pulsing into the wet clutch of what he wishes was you. You’re wailing his name on the other end, and he imagines you underneath him, warm and soft, as he shudders to a halt.

“Fuck, fuck, are you close?” He asks and you moan in return.

“Y-yes.”

“Please- Christ, want to cum with you.” He torturously slows down, moving his cock out of the toy before slowly thrusting in.

Your fingers are pumping harder as you curve them upwards to rub against that sweet spot on your walls. Your thighs shake as you arch your back off the bed. You feel a tightness in your core building up, and you know you're getting close.

"Close,” You whine.

"That's it be a good girl and cum." Cum all over your fingers." He groans

The vibrator on your clit helps to bring you closer to your release. You spread your legs even further apart. You're moaning louder into the phone. You can't even hear Matty’s voice anymore. Fucking yourself with your fingers is becoming difficult the closer you are to your release. Your walls clenching up tightly around them, and your pulse quickening.

Matty is speeding up again as well, fucking the toy relentlessly, closing his eyes imagining it is you he’s fucking into.

“The second I’m home, I’m going to fuck you in every room,” he promises, “fuck, want to cum inside of you, not in this-.”

His words bring you over the edge, your legs shutting involuntarily, and the vibrator falls from between your thighs. Your eyes roll to the back of your head as your orgasm rips through your body with so much intensity. Your vision goes black, and you stop breathing for a second. The phone lays abandoned next to your head, having dropped it long ago.

“Gonna cum- fuck- love,”

He groans louder. With a few more strokes and he's spilling his cum inside the toy. Still pumping his length, milking himself of every drop. His cum spilling out and coating his balls. He lays there in bed, phone still on his shoulder. His head all foggy, and his vision is blury.

You’re both panting into your phones, smiling to yourselves.

“You feeling alright?” He asks, putting the toy on his nightstand, hissing when he cleans his cock with some wipes.

“Mhm,” you hum, putting the blanket over your body. “Miss you Matty.”

“I miss you too, love,” he says, “just have to hold on a few more days and then I’m all yours, you still have my hoodie right?”

Your head is currently wrapped up in it, that’s why you giggle. “Yeah, but it smells more like me now.”

“S’ a bummer for you, just go to my closet.”

“Can't move my legs," you mumble, the sound muffled by the way your cheek is squished into his hoodie. "Need you to come carry me."He chuckles which is replaced by a yawn. He tells you that you both should sleep but you groan and tell him you don’t want to say goodbye.

“Fuck,” he mumbles to himself quietly, “i know exactly why you’re my girl.”

You stay quiet, ignoring that the sun is slowly coming through your curtains, enjoying the heavy breathing of Matty.

Matty hears that your breathing is still, he smiles to himself. “Sleep well, my love.”

#matty healy #the 1975 #matty healy smut #matty healy imagine #matty healy x you #matty healy blurb #matty healy fluff #matty healy x reader #matty healy oneshot #ross macdonald #george daniel #adam hann #the 1975 fic

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baejax-the-great · 3 days

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One Last Drink

“Well, here we are old friend.”

Varric takes one cup out of his pack, then another. He plonks each down on the creepy green stone he supposes he’ll be seeing a lot more of in the coming days and pours in some brandy from his flask.

He raises his cup aloft and says, “I always wanted to have one last drink with you.”

This is a lie. But then Varric is a liar. Hawke would forgive him for it.

He didn’t want to have one last drink with Hawke—he wanted a hundred more drinks with Hawke, a thousand. He wanted to sit around with her in their old age with creaky knees and white hair drinking mead and shouting over the table because their ears were both shot. He wanted to slide into old age listening to her sass all those heroes that have followed in her footsteps. He wanted to see her wielding a cane in a bar fight.

But this—this is what he has.

He taps the rim of his cup to Hawke's. The brandy goes down burning.

“You know, I somehow doubt drinking in the Fade will make it any better,” he says. “Seems like the place you’d probably want to be sober for.”

His ears strain. Was that a whisper somewhere? The Fade is weird. Maybe he’ll get a response. What would Hawke say, anyway?

Isn’t the end of the world a good enough occasion for you?

Something like that. Light tone of voice, half twisted smile at the end, she’d clink her cup to his and take a swig, maybe point out that if the Fade is now leaking into everywhere, then anywhere is as good a place to sit and drink with a friend.

“This new generation,” he says, “They’re something. They grew up hungry for a fight. Fearless. They saw the sky explode as kids. They’ve known something was wrong their entire lives. But then, I guess you also were forged in the crucible of apocalyptic disaster.”

Lothering wasn’t that bad.

This she’d say with an artful quirk of her eyebrow before letting her smile take over her face.

Varric fills his cup again. He’s played this game before, become the author of who Hawke would be if she was still anyone. He can hear her voice in his head so clearly, but for years he’s had that creeping doubt that her voice is actually just his. It’s been ten years after all.

He doesn’t know why he thought the Fade might do something nice for once. Solas always talked about those friendly spirits, but it looks like one can’t be assed to channel Hawke for Varric.

“These Veil Jumpers—out of their minds. You know they come here on purpose? Reminds me of you and all those damn caves you dragged us into, except the caves didn’t shift around while we weren’t paying attention. Similar number of demons, though.”

Not by the time I got done with them.

“They told me that right here, right where we are? That’s a fixed point. A landmark.”

“Creepy, isn’t it?” Bellara had said when Varric stopped in his tracks on seeing the statue. “She always seems to be pointed toward an exit, though, so we’re always on the lookout for her. We call her Macabre Martha.”

I’ve been called worse and you know it. You wrote all those names down in your book—you know them better than I do. Not to mention the atrocious name my own mother gave me.

Varric pats the foot of the statue next to him.

“Should I tell them who you are?”

That question he has not been able to answer for her. He looks up the silent statue, Hawke, caught in the moment a spider’s claw pierced her chest, her mouth open, her eyes wide in horror, both woman and spider leg petrified together.

He somehow thought in this place, in this warped reality, if he summoned her up in his mind, maybe she’d still be here. Maybe she’d speak to him. Maybe he could get her to look less scared.

This isn't how she'd want anyone to remember her.

“Never thought I’d see a statue of you worse than the one we put down by the docks.”

Varric pushes himself to his feet. He puts a hand on her arm as if to comfort her in the last frozen moment of her life. He thinks maybe this time the stone will crumble under his hands and reveal her, still fighting, still able to be saved, still ready with a joke.

This? Minor flesh wound. It’s not like it’s the first time I’ve been impaled.

It’s just stone under his hand. Stone, and half his heart stuck in this awful place for the rest of time.

He picks up Hawke’s cup and drinks that, too. He places the half-full flask at her feet in case she ever gets thirsty.

“So long, old friend.” He gives her one last squeeze on the arm, then shuffles off in the direction of her terrified expression. The next generation of adventurers awaits, and Varric isn’t so quick these days.

The susurrations of the Fade are all that answers him, but he still calls her voice to mind. So long, Varric.

#dragon age #da fanfic #varric #hawke #varric & hawke #dragon age fanfic #tumblr can have my one shots again why not

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overlyspecific · 1 day

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Part 4 of Merlin as Robin Hood

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

The results are in, it was pretty neck and neck so i’ll try to get the other option posted pretty quick here too. This part gets a little dark towards the end so warning for injuries and angst for the future (whats merthur without a little trauma, you cant do hurt/comfort without the hurt).

Gwaine: *carrying a crate of fresh apples into the small clearing they’ve made into a hideout* I just don’t get it. Why would he risk getting captured just to see someone who would run him through first chance he got?

Lancelot: *smiling a little to himself* Oh, you don’t know the first thing about it, friend. You should have seen them when Merlin worked as his manservant. He would spend all night saving the castle with magic just to yelled at all morning by Arthur because he forgot to polish one piece of armor.

Gwaine: *he takes a seat on his makeshift hammock and takes a swig from his suspiciously ale-smelling water skin* I just don’t get why he cares so much about him. We do good work here stealing from rich douchebags and giving to people in need. I dont see what is so different about Arthur, isnt he the worst of the worst for rich douchebags? Merlin himself calls him a prat.

Lancelot: oh I see whats going on…

Gwaine: what?

Lancelot: You’re jealous.

Gwaine: No, I’m not. Look, Merlin’s great. I just don’t like him risking everything for someone who has proven they wont do the same.

Lancelot: and what? you would be better for him?

Gwaine: I could be, at least I wouldnt toss him out to fend for himself in the woods all alone.

Merlin: *returning from his forest meeting with Arthur catching the tail end of the conversation* Gwaine, I appreciate the sentiment, but no offense you werent there and *turning to lancelot* neither were you Lance. You don’t know what went down or the hard choices we ALL had to make. so respectfully butt out of it.

Gwaine and Lancelot: *feeling guilty for getting caught* sorry merls

Merlin: its alright. Let’s just take stock of everything we got so we can distribute it-

Merlin is cut off by a yell in the woods and they all go quiet.

Lancelot: Merlin, your magic is still in place, right? No one should be able to find us.

Merlin: Yes, no one can find us unless we allow them to. Stay here, it’s probably just a lost traveller.

Gwaine: No, you shouldnt go alone. We’ll go with you.

Merlin: If its a traveller by themself then it will be better to go alone to not spook them. I have my magic to back me up and i’ll shout if they are injured or need help. Stay here.

Merlin walks into the woods alone out of the magical safety of the hideout.

Gwaine: I dont have a good feeling about this…

Meanwhile in the woods, Gwen is searching desperately around the area largely covered by trees that look the exact same.

Gwen: *to herself* c’mon gwen focus! Did he say the trees with the fruit above or below the leaves?

Merlin: *appearing from the woods like the forest druid he is at heart* I actually said the trees with the blue berries and white blossoms. I think below the leaves means they are safe to eat.

Gwen: *running to Merlin and throwing her arms around him desperately* Merlin!

Merlin: *from inside gwen’s tight bear hug* As much as I appreciate the hug, do you want to tell me why you are in the woods alone trying to find me?

Gwen: *releasing Merlin from her death grip* Merlin, you are in danger! I came from the castle as quick as I could to warn you-

Merlin: Gwen! Gwen! It’s okay! I just got away from the knights, I’m fine. Better than fine actually. Arthur saved my life…

Gwen: *trying to get a word in but Merlin has started excitedly rambling about Arthur* No, Merlin. Listen to me.

Merlin:…and the way he looked at the knight that tried to kill me, Gwen, it was like he wanted to murder HIM. Can you believe it?

Gwen: Merlin!

Merlin: *Finally realizing something isn’t right and looking around the forest* Wait, we aren’t alone.

Gwen: That’s what i’ve been trying to tell you, Merlin! The king sent Arthur as a distraction. Arthur doesn’t even know. Uther hired a witchfinder with a really powerful magical tracking amulet. You’re the biggest magical target in the vicinity. Its going to lead them right to you! You have to run, get as far as you can!

Merlin: Gwen, I cant leave Arthur. He’ll die without me.

Gwen: He’ll die if you die. You have to go!

Merlin: Fine, but I’m scrying everyday to make sure he’s-

Merlin is cut off by an arrow plunging its way into his side. He falls onto Gwen who tries to keep him standing.

Merlin: Gwen, get out of here! Find Lance and Gwaine, they’re just beyond those trees. They wont find you there. You cant be caught with me.

Gwen: Merlin!

Merlin: Gwen, go!

Gwen takes off into the woods in the direction of the hideout. Merlin falls to his knees and calls his magic up but his eyes only flicker gold for a second before dimming. Collapsing all the way to the ground, Merlin sees black boots approach him from in front of him. Merlin doesnt have the strength to raise his head but he knows if he did, he would be met with the satisfied face of the witchfinder.

Witchfinder: So you’re the great and powerful Emrys, huh? I thought you’d be harder to find.

Merlin feels one of the black boots make contact with his injured side and everything goes black.

Sorry to leave you all on a cliffhanger but I had to do it. Next part will be a flashback to the magic reveal and then we’ll see how Merlin Hood gets out of this sticky situation.

#merlin #gwaine #merthur #lancelot #arthur #gwen #bbc merlin #merlin is robin hood #angst #merlin is injured

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crepezinhos · 2 days

Text

A Thorn in my Heart

(Men that would agonize in the regret of ever cheating on you one day)

⚠️ WARNINGS:

— This will be an angst fanfic with no comfort

— Mention of suggestive topics

— They are all gonna be assholes

— Characters included: Al Haitham, Scaramouche, and Heizou.

— I would like to state that I understand the need of open relationships for some couples, but in this fanfiction I’ll use a bad example of one.

Al Haitham: You knew ever since the day Al Haitham accepted your pitiful love confession that it would not be easy to maintain that relationship. You two met in the Akademiya when you two were only 17 years old and you two were complete opposites. Al Haitham was a very quiet man, disliked by most boys but known and crushed on by many girls for his stoic face, intelligence and beauty, meanwhile you were a social butterfly, loved by everyone, and also one of these simps. As expected, Al Haitham was a very unpleasant man and he would reject or ignore all those girls that insisted on the chance of going out with him, but what made you different from those other girls is that you actually did your best to be pleasant to Al Haitham. For example, you’d listen to him yapping about math equations and philosophy but you’d never yap about your favorite things, you’d let him teach you things the way he liked it even if you didn’t understand, you wouldn’t complain about his behavior while he would… you were like his shadow. That’s what convinced him to accept dating you when you terribly confessed your crush to him, tripping on your own feet and having to pull out the “script” to make sure you got everything right. And well, it worked for some months. Both of you were very pleased to be around each other, especially you, hanging out with the dreamiest man in the school there was nothing better than that for a 17 year-old girl! But Al Haitham always felt like something was missing in you and your relationship… and he realized what it was after some weeks after a new girl stepped in the class. Personality. You were pleasant to hang around with but you would never show yourself to be a smart or a confident girl, you were just his maid mostly. Comparing you to that new, tall, pretty girl, you were… nothing. And to your misfortune, she also developed interest in Al Haitham and he did not close the doors for her. He felt academically challenged by her and she felt challenged by him. That rivalry only fueled Al Haitham’s feelings more and more. You never made him feel so emotional like that. Your relationship with him after her arrival lasted some poor, loveless weeks until you finally saw her launching herself to his lips and him, instead of neglecting her, held her cheeks and relaxed his body like he never did with you.

“How could you, Al Haitham?!” You screamed at him, countless tears streaming down your face. Al Haitham was standing like nothing was going on, in fact, he thought your teary, freaked-out face was disgusting. Anyone who saw the scene would call you a maniac.

“Look, Y/N, our relationship has never really worked, I don’t know why you’re so surprised. Let’s just get this over with before you stress out more than already are.” Al Haitham bursted some of his real feelings.

“Of course I am stressed out, Al Haitham! You betrayed me! How could you?! I’ve always done all my best for you!” You cried out, stepping closer to him.

“I acknowledge that, Y/N. You’re not going to make me feel any worser about it like this. You should calm down before discussi—” He let out some of his stress for you.

“Make YOU feel bad?! CALM DOWN?! How dare you accuse me of something like this, Al Haitham?! You should be feeling worser about this, it’s no kind of manipulation! We’re fucking done! You’re a selfish piece of shit!” You screamed out, finally leaving the scene before he could even think of responding your insult.

Al Haitham as a kid and an adult never thought that his mistake as a grumpy teenager would make him feel that much of regret. He feels sorry for you to have lived with the worst of him, such an immature version of himself. He doesn’t even know for sure if he feels sorry for you or his ego. It makes him look stupid, because he was, and he hates to ever think that you’d never forget how easily stupid he had once been. That moment was forever going to be the thorn of his reputation un Sumeru. You’re a very well-succeeded woman now, all grown up and developed in many ways. Al Haitham felt bad for knowing he had hurt someone who became very influential and in Sumeru. The regret he should’ve felt 10 years ago only begun to hit him now, probably because he feels attracted to you again. Maybe he would be feeling better about himself if he hadn’t fell for another woman’s seduction, who abandoned Sumeru to have her dreamy life in Snezhnaya as soon as the opportunity rose.

“Al Haitham?” You asked as soon as you saw him coming close to you, turning off your phone and shoving it in your purse.

“Y/N…” He said out your name but went quiet for some seconds, unsure of what to say next. “Can we talk?” He asked, thinking that you would reject him immediately.

“I mean… is it an emergency? I’m pretty busy right now.” You answered, really believing that this wasn’t about his affair for a moment.

You two now were colleagues, sometimes working together in high-rank missions.

He looked down and realized you weren’t wearing your uniform. You had makeup on, high heels and a beautiful dress… you look just as pretty as when you were 16, and that just influenced him to speak out more of his feelings.

“I… I’m sorry.” He admitted, as high as a whisper, without answering your question.

“What?” You asked, genuinely not understanding what he said.

“I’m sorry.” He said again, this time with his eyes closed to increase confidence, and you got a little confused.

“Foooorrrr..?”

“You know… me cheating.”

“Oh, you’re already forgiven.” You chuckled, really careless about it.

“But I never apologized.” He said, surprised at your reaction.

“Yeah, I know.” You said, beginning to feel slightly awkward.

“Is there any chance we could be… better friends again or… even more?” He asked, scratching the back of his neck.

“What do you mean ‘even more’?”

“Like… a couple.”

“A couple?” You asked way higher than him, slightly shocked, and making him feel very embarrassed.

“Yeah.” He looked away.

“Al Haitham, first of all, you’re asking me for this in a very inappropriate situation, second of all, no.”

“Why?” He asked, slightly sad with his broken expectations.

“Al Haitham, just as you said to me when we broke up, our relationship never really worked. It took me a lot of time to realize it, but, yeah, you were right as always, haha! We weren’t really close to each other, you know? I was just your annoying shadow.” You explained, slightly offended at the absurdity of his words, but still being very kind to him.

But he could see how you really had overcame him and the trauma of being cheated on.

“I know and I want to redeem this mistake… I want to make things right. I don’t want you to take those stupid things that I said that day to your heart, I should be the one doing that.” He confessed, genuinely starting to feel emotional as he tried stepping closer to you.

“You don’t need to worry about that anymore, Al Haitham, I forgave you for a reason. And I think we already have a pretty good relationship right now, don’t you think? Even if it’s just professional…” You asked a little bit ironic.

You didn’t hate him nor loved him.

“But—”

“Remember our first time together? You couldn’t reach your orgasm, you couldn’t feel pleasure in me even if I was soaking wet for you, haha!” You gave him an example, making him go quiet in embarrassment.

You were right… and that messed him up.

Al Haitham hates to be wrong or defeated.

“I’m sorry, Al Haitham, I can’t and don’t want to take you back.” You said with a very comforting voice, even if he hated to hear your rejection.

“But, I just told you, I want to redeem my mistakes with you, they make me feel… horrible.” He vented.

“As I just told you too, I've forgiven you long time ago, Al Haitham. You don’t need to waste your time on this anymore… I don’t even know why you're doing this now, it’s been 10 years.” You checkmated him, finally making him go silent in defeat and you too. “Go home, take a bath and rest. You really won’t have problems on finding another woman to help you redeem your mistakes in the past and make you feel better about yourself, you’re really attractive.” You suggested very kindly, and you two suddenly noticed the presence of a third person arriving at the scene.

It was the General Mahamatra, also very well dressed.

Al Haitham clenched his fists his in agony of being wordless, defeated logically and jealously of seeing the woman he regretted letting go, walking away from him to hook up with his rival, Cyno.

“Did something happen, Y/N?” Al Haitham heard Cyno ask to you, taking a slight look back at Al Haitham in suspicion.

“Nope, don’t worry about it.” You answered with a smile in your face, hugging his arm in excitement.

And Cyno smiled back. As a man, Al Haitham could notice just how much Cyno wanted to fuck you in that dress, just like Al Haitham wanted too.

Scaramouche: As Scaramouche’s only girlfriend in the world, only you knew just how cutesy of a boyfriend he was. No one would believe in you when you said so, but everyone believed the reason why you two broke up. It was obviously not easy to become close to him, it wasn’t even something either of you desired, but your heart was too kind for him to not feel safe around you and you not get attached to him. A simple maid that worked in the Winter Palace, with a heart kinder than the archon herself, dating the worst Harbinger anyone could ever work with, the complete opposite of you. It was pretty obvious to you that Scaramouche’s personality was something crafted and not natural, so you never bothered to give him the reaction he desired when he called you names, instead, you gave him positivity, one that he has never seen or received. And that made him fall head over heels for you in less than a year. It was wonderful taking care of Scaramouche, teaching him how to treat people fairly and how to face and stop his constant nightmares. You wanted him to grow out of his past and let his inner kindness take control of his decisions, but accidentally, you also rose his ego. You always complimented him for the bare minimum, cheered him for anything and taught him some basic philosophy that made him feel smart, unbeatable and confident. So confident that in the first opportunity he found himself longing for you and your touch when he wasn’t in Snezhnaya, he used another woman to fulfill his desires, believing that he deserved it and that you’d never find out. But as expected, a vicious cycle of sleeping with other women begun. It was so damn obvious that you found out it only after 2 weeks of his arrival from his mission in Inazuma.

“Why..?” That was all you could say after crying for many hours of seeing the man you were healing and building… giving love to another woman like you were nothing. Even calling you names.

“Let’s just get this over with, ok? We’re breaking up, I don’t have time for a whole discussion.” He said, crossing his arms in embarrassment and even disgust of dealing with someone so emotional like you.

“How can you be so cold about this, Scaramouche?” You whispered, still staring at the window for not finding courage to look at his figure standing behind you.

“Why do you act like I’ve never acted cold with you or anyone else in my life?” He scoffed, trying to hide the fact that his ego was slightly hurt from being caught so stupidly easy and fast.

“Because it doesn’t make any sense, Scaramouche! This isn’t just rudeness, it’s raw cruelty! I spent so much time taking care of you, teaching you, singing you to sleep, trying to make you overcome your past and this is what you do to me?! Cheat?! How could you?!” You screamed, finally finding the courage to look back ar him and challenge him, which made him unfortunately… snap.

“You know what, Y/N? I never fucking asked you to help me trying to deal with this! I was fine being who I am! Why the fuck are you blaming ME for YOUR decision, huh?! But thank you for your waste of time on me… now all women in Snezhnaya desire me because they know that you made me a slightly better man and a better fucker! Congratulations on being used, Y/N, now I’ll move on like you never existed and enjoy my life the way it’s supposed to be enjoyed! Don’t ever bother on talking to me again.” He bursts all his anger out, storming off your home and barely breaking your door from banging it.

2 weeks. That was all the time necessary for Scaramouche to realize he fucked up. Initially, his ego was all up in the sky. He knew that he had broken you and your trust bad, he knew that he made you quit your job and stop having relationships with other men. But remember, the higher you rise, the harder you fall. Less women desired him after the gossip of your nasty breakup spread around the town, all the slight relationships he had built with his inferiors broke because you weren’t there to regulate what came out of his mother. But then, all the psychological help you gave him begun to crack. His nightmares came back and now he had no one to hug. What about the sluts he’d sleep with? Well… they found his behavior towards nightmares funny or childish whenever they witnessed it, they wouldn’t sing him a lullaby to sleep, they wouldn’t teach him how to not be inconvenient, they wouldn’t compliment his efforts as a Harbinger, they wouldn’t hear his venting and they wouldn’t cheer him up. Only you did. The woman he had absolutely crushed was the only person who did those. Things to him got so bad, and so quick, that right now, Scaramouche was absolutely panicking as he banged your door with his feat and screaming for you to open it, scared of the darkness of the night like a kid.

You gently opened it despite his aggressiveness, with a very sleepy and dead face.

“Y/N…” He called your name out, happy that you opened it despite knowing it was him.

“What?” You asked absolutely cold and unmoved by his relief.

But he didn’t know what to say anymore. If he even dared to start speaking his feelings out, he would collapse and his ego would burn his heart alive.

“If you have nothing to say, why did you even bother waking me up at 2 AM?” You asked a little stressed at his audacity of showing up, still not managing to make him say anything. “Well then, good night, Scaramouche.” You said trying to close your door and walking the other way around, but he instantly held the door with his hand.

“Wait! Please!” He screamed desperately.

“What are you do—?!” You tried slamming the door back, but he obviously he won the battle and managed to push you away and get inside your home, closing the door very gently compared to his last actions.

“Y/N…” He said again, slowly stepping closer to your figure sitting in the floor.

“You’re trespassing.” You said, getting up as quick as you could and stepping away, but Scaramouche finally gave up on trying to save his ego.

After all, he felt really safe when he was alone with you.

“I’m sorry.” He started, completely ignoring the fact that he could get big consequences from trespassing your home.

“What?” You asked, not clearly hearing what he said but Scaramouche threw himself at you, making you hit your back in the closest wall.

He hugged you hard enough to break a rib and shoved his face between your neck and your shoulder. Your soft skin and its warmth was already so comforting to him that he just wanted to hug more and more until his face was fully buried and melted in your neck.

“Y/N, please… hear me out… I didn’t mean anything that I said that day… I was just… I don’t know… but please! I’ll go to my mission in Sumeru tomorrow and my nightmares are coming back..! I don’t want to go alone, I don’t want to leave without your forgiveness, your comfort, that sweet smile of yours..! I don’t have a single person to support me on this! I’m sorry, I’m so, so sorry, Y/N… I’ll do whatever you want for you to forgive me!” He vented, absolutely wetting your neck from his many tears as his heart ached by his destroyed ego.

But you were silent, deadly silent.

He looked up at you again and met you just staring at the door completely careless. You just heard the Sixth Fatui Harbinger whimper like a kid… why were you acting like he wasn’t there? Like nothing happened? Like you didn’t care? You always listened to him when you two were a couple…

“You know, Scaramouche?” You said with an ironic smile in your face, finally making eye contact with him. “Ever since the day you told me about mother, your best friend and the orphan kid you met… I had the feeling I had to tell you just how similar you are to them, but I thought it would hurt you more than help you, so I didn’t, but you’re really just like them, Scaramouche.” You told the truth to him, making his his heart skip a beat in surprise at your capacity of saying something so cruel.

You didn’t even need to say a bad word or an insult, truth is Scaramouche’s biggest fear.

“Wha… what..?” He mumbled, trying to believe he did not just heard that.

“You’re just like them, Scaramouche.” You repeated with no remorse. “You’re irresponsible like your mother, you’re murderous like your best friend and a liar like that sick orphan kid.”

“No… Y/N, what are you saying..? Stop it!” He begged in realization that what you said made sense.

“Stop? You’re in my territory, Scaramouche. You might have some authority in Snezhnaya as a Harbinger, but you have no power here… at least, not anymore.” You joked.

“Why are you comparing me to them…? To people that destroyed my trust… who made me act like how I do..?” He asked, getting slightly away from you in fear but still gripping your shoulders tight.

“Because you betrayed me, Scaramouche… just like them. You’re a murderous puppet who used me and lied to me.” You made sure to make those words were understood one by one, which made him want to cry.

Puppet? You called him a puppet.

For the time ever, you didn’t see him as a human.

You always called him a human, you always reassured him that he was more human than most humans around. He even has this beautiful memory of you telling him he was indistinguishable from a male human while you cuddled him to sleep after sex… now being contrasted by your careless, cold voice telling him otherwise.

“Now I understand why you cheated on me, you can’t love. It’s either because you’re too fucked up in the head or simply because you don’t have an actual heart.” Time seemed to have stopped due to the pain in Scaramouche’s heart, sobbing like a kid on hearing that, and you still took advantage of his vulnerability to get close to his ear and whisper your final words to him.

“You’re my first betrayal.” You said it just like he used to say ir when he vented about his past.

In Sumeru, he didn’t even dare sleep. He knew he wouldn’t be able to because that was all that ran through his mind.

You’re my first betrayal, you’re my first betrayal, you’re my first betrayal, you’re my first betrayal…

You’re just like them, just like them, just like them, just like them...

You’re a murderous puppet, puppet, puppet, puppet, puppet…

You don’t have an actual heart, heart, heart, heart, heart, heart, heart…

In the few rests he took, he had nightmares of you too, which didn’t help too. They were all sick and made him feel ill. All of them were him being forced to go through his last moment with you again or you touched or pleasured by another man’s hands and loving it. And it was always men he hated such as Dottore, Tartaglia, Niwa… it was truly a bad time for him.

This lack of sleep destabilized him so bad that it took Nahida 57 attempts instead of 168 to defeat him, and she obviously noticed it. His mind was not focused on that mission as much it would’ve been if he hadn’t heard those words… if he hadn’t committed the mistake of breaking a smart woman’s heart… the love of his life.

As Wanderer, he still remembered the things you said to him that day but he finally accepted them and let those words define him. He really wanted to see you and maybe build things with you again, but he would hate the feeling of dating someone who would’ve never accepted it if the name Scaramouche still existed.

“Thinking about her again, Hat Guy?” Nahida asked, showing up from behind while Wanderer zoned out in Akademiya’s library.

Heizou: Heizou was always known in Inazuma for being a one-night guy, but somehow, he still managed to get you head over heels for him. It all started simply because Heizou thought you were really good-looking and wanted to push his way inside you, but when he went up to you to flirt and joke around, you seemed to genuinely enjoy the things he said. You giggled at his stupid puns and jokes, you got embarrassed when he complimented you… it was like you didn’t understand his true intentions. It pained him to see you not understanding his dirty jokes and rejecting his proposals, but Heizou still wanted you, so he never stopped talking to you, which made you two only get closer and closer to each other and made you like him more and more. It obviously led to what Heizou always wanted, both of you making out and fucking each other like two animals in a bed. He obviously had a lot of experience while you had very few, which made everything wonderful to you. He reassured you in each step of it, he gained your trust to see you naked, he gave you love and pleasure… it was perfect. Heizou was also very pleased on making such a cute and innocent woman scream and moan his name so loud and beg for more like a whore. That night was the moment you realized you really crushed on Heizou, but that night was just another night of sex for Heizou. He didn’t really fall in love with you and your slow brain. Still, the confidence you got from that night was so big that a week later, you told him how you felt for him. Heizou was doubtful at first, unsure whether he felt lust or love for you. But… if he felt unsure, that probably means he’s in love too, right? No, the relationship broke off in two months. Heizou was a great company and partner for you, but the women Heizou had done before you never really forgot about him and the sensation of his sex. They knew he was dating you, but they didn’t really care, it was just one round of sex after all. They would throw themselves on him when you were absent and seduce him just the way he loved it, telling him it was only going to be a one-time thing… a quickie… and that you’d never find out until he finally couldn’t keep his dick in his pants anymore. A vicious cycle begun, he was back to his addiction. Unfortunately, Heizou was great at hiding it and you were innocent, so it took you many months to find out. You caught him during an act with a prostitute when you came back home way too early from a business trip to Liyue as a surprise for his birthday. You had even bought him a lingerie of his favorite color, dark red.

“How could you, Heizou?! I was out there working for us and your birthday, and that’s what you’ve been doing?! In our bed, too?! The bed we used to cuddle each other?!” You screamed at him completely heart-broken at realization you were just another woman in his sex catalogue.

“Y/N, please… I can expla—”

“You told me I was special, that I was perfect… that you’ve never felt so good with any other woman and seen someone as beautiful as me… why..? If you just wanted sex, you could’ve told me!” You vented in grief. “I loved with all my heart you, Heizou…” You confessed, making Heizou turn his head in embarrassment.

“I love you too, Y/N, I just… can’t, I need this.” That was all he could say.

After all, he couldn’t really excuse his actions.

“What the fuck do you mean by ‘you need it’? I always gave it to you.” You scoffed, realizing the problem wasn’t you. “Fuck you, Heizou, we’re over.” You stated before beginning to step away from your home.

But Heizou held your wrist in the first step.

“No! Wait!” He screamed.

“What the fuck do you want?! Let me go!” You fought him back.

“I don’t want us to end…” He insisted for some reason.

“You only have yourself to blame.” You insulted, refusing to look back at him.

“What if we open our relationship?”

Initially, Heizou was very happy about opening the relationship, after all, he had many women to sleep with. But you were not happy. It made you feel horrible about yourself, ugly, worthless, a mere object for his pleasure. You didn’t care if you had the rights to hang out with other men too, you liked being personal. The only rule between you two was that you should tell when you’re going out, but it was the worst part of it. You’d stay all by yourself after he told you he was gonna go out and he wouldn’t even come back in the same day to cuddle with you to sleep. It has been 2 weeks since the change, yet, you haven’t went out in a single date. Today, you finally had enough. The thought of Heizou having sex with another woman finally made you have a breakdown and you left home. You ran away to Chinju Forest to enjoy nature at nighttime. Reconnecting with nature never failed in comforting you.

“Are you ok, ma’am?” A gente male voice asked behind you, but you were so depressed that you didn’t even get scared with the sudden appearance.

“Not really.” You answered truthfully, which made the man sit down by your side at the peak of the mountain just like you, legs hanging in the air, his eyes staring at the starry sky with you.

He had long white hair with a weird red streak in the left side for some reason. He looked incredibly beautiful with the moonlight shining his hair.

“Mind telling me what happened?” He asked, pulling out a blank paper from his kimono.

“What’s that?” You asked.

“Could a poem possibly make you feel any better?”

“A poem?” You asked slightly shocked.

“Yes, the name’s Kaedehara Kazuha by the way.” He offered a hand to shake.

“I’ve heard about you… you’re the man that held the Musou no Hitotachi by himself! It is an honor to meet you, my name’s Y/N Y/S.” You shook his hand, feeling a little bit more excited already.

“Thank you, but it wasn’t that much.” He said.

“Well then, Mr. Hitotachi, would you like to hear a story?”

“I’m all ears.”

You eventually broke down while telling the story, telling him all the details of it, even the most unnecessary ones, no matter how you lacked intimacy with him. All he did his focus on writing the poem in that paper, so you really felt safe telling him it. You kept crying in your knees for some minutes after finishing the story while Kazuha finalized the poem.

“Here.” He offered you the paper, and you took it.

Now, it had the poem he promised written in it describing the feeling of knowing you’re not the only partner in a relationship very sharply. It was exactly you, even if it had no genders implied. As you read word by word, you felt your heart ache just more and more due to the self-identification, making you sob even more tears.

“You’re no help…” You sobbed while giving him the poem back, barely damaging it.

“Is there any other way I could help you? It’d be rude of me to leave a lady all alone in a forest at nighttime, especially a pretty one.” He flirted while taking the poem back, making you stare his gaze back in slight surprise with his flirt.

It didn’t take minutes until you two were desperately making out and having sex in the grass, completely unbothered by the fact that you were naked to a stranger. That man was simply irresistible. He wasted his time hearing you vent and wasted even more time making a poem about it? Being that beautiful and charming too? Why would you say no? And now you really don’t regret it because he was making you absolutely go mad with his thrusts. It was like he was pushing out every single bit of pain you felt with his slow, precise thrusts at your G-spot, making it all leave from your mouth in form of shaky moans and screams. You two were arched in an impossible angle, your nails crawling his back and your eyes miring the shiny stars in the sky.

“That’s it, Y/N… let it all out…” He whispered in your ear, making your insides clench even more around his dick with the closure of your orgasm.

You still felt the butterflies of what you had done that night as you walked back home.

“Where were you?” Heizou asked pretty neutrally when you finally closed the door, standing in the home’s only corridor like he had been waiting for you.

“I… I was out.” You answered, still shocked with what happened. It felt like you could still feel his dick ejaculating inside you.

“You didn’t tell me.” He confronted.

“Sorry, I wasn’t planning on going out but I felt too horrible staying home alone.” You indirectly insulted him.

“It’s ok, just warn me next time.” He demanded, ignoring your insults.

You’d definitely warn him next time.

You’d definitely warn him multiple times.

Heizou’s catalogue has been decreasing a lot recently. He has enjoyed his partners way too quick but you would were just starting. He was spending most of his hours at home again but you weren’t there that frequently anymore to give him attention and love. He could tell you were hanging out with other men and for some reason he did not like it.

You and Heizou had just made sex again. You were sleeping peacefully but he was sat down at the bed, thinking. It was one of the worst sexes Heizou had ever had. Before the storm, sex with you was magic to him. You’d hug him during all of it, scratching his back like your life depended on it, you’d need to feel every single inch of his skin touching yours, you’d whisper to him how much you loved it, he would rip out the loudest moans of the world with ease, just by fucking you nice and slow in your soft spot, he would make you beg to go faster and scream his name when you were close to your orgasm… But now… you did none of those. Your moans were painfully low, your face was relaxed, like what he did to you were tickles, you wouldn’t beg and scream his name anymore, you’d grip on the pillow instead of his back and all that you’d whisper were orders… he didn’t like it att all. It felt like you had been already satisfied by another man who had shown you better and stretched your insides more than him, and it made him feel sick.

When he looked at your eyes, it didn’t feel like he was making love to his girlfriend, it felt like he was fucking one of the prostitutes of his previous affair.

Heizou was disappointed at himself for letting your experience with him become so ignorable and even opening the relationship in the first place. He was so desperate to know whether you were or were not hanging with other men that he decided to find out by himself.

“Archons, Kazuha!” You screamed his name once again after many times. “Fuck me to oblivion!” You begged like an animal as you received all his relentless thrusts inside you.

His theories were unfortunately right. There was indeed another man fulfilling you before than him, another man taking all your attention away, another man stealing you from him. That man was making you feel so good he could even hear soggy noises whenever he rocked your hips, like you were wetter for him rather than Heizou. He from the felt deadly jealous, but he knew it was unfair to. He gave the idea of opening the relationship, and now he has to face the consequences of it just like you had to.

He tried to actually fix the relationship before actually confessing his desire. He tried his best to spend more time with you and make you feel more pleasure in sex but it did not work, it would even get awkward sometimes.

“Beg for it.” Heizou ordered with a smirk in his face, trying to act he was loving the experience to make you more involved with it.

“N-No… not today, Heizou.” You ignored him, smiling in relaxation of his thrusts.

He hated it. Your closed eyes, probably picturing that stupid fucking criminal you were hanging out with instead of him. He couldn’t take it anymore, and even if it was as unfair of him, he told how he felt.

“Hey, Y/N.” He said, tapping you in both your shoulders as you brushed your hair in a chair.

“Yeah?” You answered still looking at the mirror of the table.

“Can we talk?” He asked, and you got confused, but already predicting what it would be.

“Don’t you have a date now?” You replied slightly ironic.

“Yes, but I don’t wanna go anymore… I’d rather stay home with you, talking...” He flirted with a cute smile, trying to convince you.

“Sorry, hun, I have a date in 30 minutes, can’t stay home.” You explained.

The way you used that nickname so lovelessly made him feel sad too. He remembers the day you invented the complete nickname, “Honeyzou” and started calling him “honey”, “hun” and any variation, now being used so carelessly.

“Y/N, listen, I want to close our relationship.” He finally confessed, sighing afterwards in relief of telling you.

You stopped brushing your hair and looked back at him, slightly surprised with the audacity his request.

“Are you serious?” You asked seriously.

“Yes.”

“Very funny, Heizou, now please, I need to finish my makeup.” You said, turning back to the mirror.

“No, Y/N, I’m dead serious.” He pleaded, crouching next to you to get your attention again. “It’s been a while since we last talked about our relationship and this lack of communication has created problems between us.”

“Heizou, you opened yourself to other women when our relationship was still closed. You created this lack of communication, not me.” You confronted, stoping everything again to look at him very angry.

“It doesn’t matter! We’ve grown distant from each other and it’s killing me! You’re fulfilling all your desires with a fucking ex-criminal and leave nothing for me! That’s not how it works!”

“First of all, you have to remember you did the same when we were closed, you hypocrite. Second of all, I warned you multiple times that I’m not an open woman and don’t think it would work for me. Third of all, how do you know I’m hanging with… oh my god, Heizou, what the fuck is wrong with you?!” She screamed in disgust and realization of his stalking.

“I was worried, okay?!”

“Worried about what?! That’s fucking disgusting, Heizou! Jesus Christ, just let me go meet him already, he must be waiting outside.” You tried storming out of the room.

“No, Y/N, please! I want to talk with you, I want to be with you, I want us to look like a couple again!” He pulled you back and held your chin gently to force eye contact.

“And I wanted you to not be a fucking cheater, but you still fucked thousands of women in my absence!” You screamed back at him. “Fucking hell, I should’ve known this was a terrible idea!” You scoffed, closing your eyes in stress.

“But I love you, Y/N, please… I love you more than Kaedehara Kazuha ever will.” He whined.

“You don’t, Heizou… you don’t and you won’t.” You fought back.

Knock knock.

You kept Kazuha waiting outside for too long.

“Heizou, I have to go.” You repeated one more time, already knowing what he would say.

“Y/N, please… I just need one more night with you to show you just how much I love and want you… walking with you around the town… cuddling you to sleep with that goofy smile of yours…” He flirted, putting a piece of your hair behind your ear.

“Why? Did the sluts you fucked stop doing it with you?” You confronted, making him go silent. “I think we should go separate ways already, Heizou.”

“No, Y/N, that’s stupid and unnecessary!” He argued back.

“For you! Because if you don’t have two or more women to have easy sex with, you go nuts! But I don’t need that! I am a personal woman who cried every single night you went out and left me craving for affection at home! You’re only hurting because we’ve switched roles!” You insulted him.

“You know that’s not true, Y/N! I don’t need anyone else but you!” He insisted.

“Then why the fuck did you cheat, huh?!” You argued once more, and made him go quiet again, defeated by the confrontation. “See?! I’m telling you, Heizou, we should break up… for good.” You finally separated his hand from your hair and wrist and begun walking out of the house, leaving him alone with tears forming in his eyes.

“I bought this for my ex-boyfriend when I was in Liyue but I never got the chance to use it… it made me feel horrible.” Heizou heard you whisper with that sweet, seductive voice of yours to Kazuha while arching your ass up to Kazuha.

Heizou just can’t let you go. He can’t accept the fact that you like an ex-criminal better than him. So he stalked you again to know if you really are in-love with this man or just having fun.

“You look marvelous.” Kazuha flirted, pulling your panties down with a very lusty smirk in his face. “Mind if I use my hands in your head?” He asked, now pulling his pants down.

“No, not all.” You answered, and Kazuha finally thrusted you as he pushed your head down in the grass.

Heizou thought his request was weird, but as soon as he saw Kazuha’s head lift up right in his direction with a very sharp face, he understood the request.

He had noticed Heizou’s presence and didn’t want you to notice it too.

As Kazuha stared him deep down at his soul, he mouthed the word “Leave” very clearly, making Heizou frown in slight anger. But still, he decided to leave and not watch the painful scene of you loving another man.

By the way, I’d just like to inform that I’ll begin working on my requests again but it might take a while because I’m a little busy with the end of my school year and a little less creative and motivated too. I just REALLY wanted to get these angsty ideas out of my mind lol. Hope you guys like it! ❤️

#genshin impact #genshin x reader #wanderer genshin #genshin scara #scara x reader #scaramouche #shikanoin heizou #heizou x reader #genshin heizou #alhaitham #al haitam x reader #al haitham #genshin angst #angst

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hrtsvivis · 1 day

Text

𝑺𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒖𝒈𝒈𝒍𝒆𝒔 ౨ৎ ·˚

"𝑩𝒖𝒕 𝒏𝒐 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒊𝒄𝒆𝒔 𝒖𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒍 𝒊𝒕'𝒔 𝒕𝒐𝒐 𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒅𝒐 𝒂𝒏𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈" -𝒕𝒂𝒚𝒍𝒐𝒓 𝒔𝒘𝒊𝒇𝒕

hwang hyunjin x fem!reader

summary: buried in work and distanced from you, hyunjin doesn't have that much time for you and doesn't notice your serious ed problem. Will you be able to overcome everything

word count: 838 words

requested by: @xxmaddymillerxx

The dim light of the living room flickered, casting elongated shadows on the walls. Y/N sat curled up on the couch, staring blankly at the television screen. It was playing a variety show, one of Hyunjin’s recent appearances, but her mind was elsewhere. He was really busy with the new comeback. As a result of that, he was rarely home, often late at night. She hadn't seen him properly in weeks. Their only interactions were though brief conversations over text or her hearing him coming home in hours way past midnight.

The strain of his comeback preparations had pulled them apart, the demanding schedules and relentless practices consuming all of Hyunjin's time and energy. You understood that this was his job, but it was impossible to fight the feeling of loneliness and distance between you two. You found herself skipping meals, the constant anxiety eating you out. It was a coping mechanism from the past that you never wanted to return. The meals that used to be enjoyable now felt like a chore, and the once comforting act of eating became a struggle. Sadly, it was too late now as you have already fallen into the spiral of anxiety and not eating.

Days turned into weeks, your appearance was getting worse and there wasn't any sign of getting better. You couldn't overcome this by yourself, but you didn't want to bother Hyunjin. Your face was way slimmer and paler. Your clothes hung looser and dark circles formed under your eyes because of the many sleepless nights.

Hyunjin was exhausted. The endless hours in the studio, the many dance practices, and the late-night rehearsals were taking their toll. Stray Kids was preparing for their next big comeback, and the pressure was immense. He barely had time to sleep, let alone see his girlfriend, Y/N. He knew that this wasn't good for any of them, but the worst of all things were those that were hidden from him.

One night, as you lay in bed scrolling through her phone, a notification from Hyunjin popped up. You opened it eagerly, your heart aching for any connection with him.

"Hey, love. I know it's been hard. Comeback prep is almost over. I miss you. - Hyun". Maybe he will finally have time for you.

One evening, Hyunjin finally came home, exhausted but excited to see you. “Y/N, I’ve missed you,” your boyfriend, pulling her into a tight hug. You melted into his touch, enjoying the rare moment of closeness. But he pulled back quickly, his brow furrowing as he looked at you more closely.

“Have you lost weight? Are you okay?” he asked, his tone shifting from joy to concern.

“I’m fine, just a bit tired,” you lied, forcing a smile to hide the truth “How was practice?”

He know something was wrong, but didn't want to ask again out of fear of upsetting you. He began telling you about the upcoming performances, clearly excited. You of course listened, nodding and smiling but you mind was a haze of guilt and fear. How would you even tell him about everything that bothers you.

More days passed, and Hyunjin's concern grew even more. He noticed your unusual behavior and you skiping meals. It was time to actually talk to you. One night, he found you in the bathroom, staring at your reflection with sad and hollow eyes. The sight there broke something inside him. He approached you, gently placing his hands on your shoulders.

“Y/N, talk to me please. What’s going on?” he asked softly.

Tears welled up in your eyes as you completely broke down. “I’m so sorry, Hyunjin. I didn’t want to worry you. I didn’t know how to handle everything. You were so busy, and I felt so alone. I thought you forgot about me. "

Hyunjin pulled you into his tight embrace, his heart aching at her words. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. I should have noticed. I should have been here for you when you needed me the most."

You sobbed into his chest, the weight of the pain you carried till this moment pouring out. "You’re never a burden,” he whispered, kissing the top of your head. “You’re the most important person in my whole life. We’ll get through this together. I promise. ”

From that moment, Hyunjin made a conscious effort to be more present. He rearranged his schedule, making time to be with you. Together you seeked professional help together, addressing your eating disorder with care and patience. Slowly, you started to recover, feeling a lot better. This was all because of him. He was your biggest support though these hard times.

Months later, as you sat together on the couch, Hyunjin wrapped his arms around you, a sense of peace settling over you. “I’m here for you, always,” he said.

“And I’m here for you,” you replied, leaning into his embrace. After everything that happened, your bond became even stronger. Hyunjin realized that no comeback, no amount of fame or success, was worth losing the person he loved most. Nothing was impossible to overcome now.

#stray kids x reader fluff #stray kids imagines #stray kids #hwang hyunjin x reader #stray kids hyunjin #hyunjin x reader #hyunjin #hwang hyunjin #kpop #kpop x reader #kpop x y/n #kpop fanfic #hyunjin x ed reader #stray kids x reader

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elliesspacewalker · 1 day

Note

i looovvee the song daddy issues by the neighborhood (definitely does not say anything abt me) do you think you could make headcannons inspired by the song?

where reader has never been taken care of but ellie come along and like heals her ig? 😏

Hell yeah

warnings: 18+, these are going to get dark, mentions of childhood trauma, abusive parents, panic attacks, mentions of murder, trans! Ellie.

- Ellie met you in her shared dorm with you and Dina, after you had a panic attack crying on the ground after you accidentally broke Dina's favourite cup.

"hey, hey, are you okay?" Ellie kneels down next to you, and caresses your hair gently as you sob and rant on about how you broke Dina's favourite cup, "it's okay- I promise, she doesn't care"

"are you sure?" sobs continue to leave your mouth as Ellie sits next to you leaning against the wall "I promise"

- Ellie who asked you about what you were thinking about, while you were both studying together.

"what are you thinking about, hon?" she questions, you shrug, trying to brush it off, "if I told you what I was thinking about you'd think I was insane" Ellie laughs "you couldn't say a single thing to me that would make me think you're insane"

"I killed someone" you joke and a choked out "what" leaves Ellie's lips "I'm fucking joking!" you say as soon as you realise she didn't think you were joking.

"I think I like you" and just like that, you and Ellie began dating—not only this, but this is when all your past trauma started taking effect on your relationship.

- Ellie who comforted you whenever you thought you did something wrong. she knew there was something deeper that you weren't telling her but never pushed you to say anything if you weren't ready-

- Ellie who sat and listened to you whenever you needed to rant, and in fact. it was the first time you ever opened up to Ellie.

"this is how my story begins and I don't ever wanna tell the story again" you cry as tears drip down your face "it's okay, you can cry- I'm here for you" you immediately find comfort in Ellie's lap.

"and my dad? fuck he was crazy, he was never present- he cheated on mom so many fucking times and i- he used to yell at me for leaving a light on, that's fucking insane am I right?" ranting on and on, Ellie didn't once turn her attention to something else. it was on you and only you.

- Ellie who pushed you out of your comfort zone to make more friends and learn that not all people are bad, she knew you had social anxiety due to growing up with your parents who never taught you how to communicate properly.

"I'd do whatever I can do to protect you, you know that right?" Ellie says as she places her hand on your thigh, as she drives to Jesse's place. you smile and nod, leaning on her shoulder as she drives.

- Ellie who watched you have a panic attack over eating the last brownie, that was in fact her brownie. "I don't care, it's not the end of the world babe, it's just a brownie" she chuckles, this doesn't calm you down once—ellie realises this and hugs you tight "it's okay"

"my dad left money in mom's hands but I always felt bad for eating the last food because maybe Mom doesn't have enough money and i-" Ellie pats your head in a comforting way, suddenly you realise there wasn't any reason to react to that.

- Ellie who was so happy to see you finally come out of your shell and actually enjoy life the way people should—she pushed you to finally get therapy, which helped a lot. she noticed you going out a lot more, not crying over every small inconvenience.

- Ellie who cuddled you so much that you actually wanted to push her off you sometimes "Ellie, I'm boiling" she grumbles, and you chuckle at her half asleep body, pulling a hair strain behind her ear as she snuggles into you more.

- Ellie who teared up when you told her that she saved your life, "are you crying?"

"what? me, ew get away!" she sniffles and hugs you, telling you how much she loves you.

#ellie williams #ellie the last of us #trans!ellie #transgender ellie #ellie x reader #ellie tlou #ellie x fem reader #ellie x y/n #the last of us #ellie x you #ellie williams x fem reader #ellie williams fluff #ellie fluff #wlw #lesbian #transgender #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x female reader

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steviewashere · 2 days

Note

hmmm i think for a prompt i will sayyy steve/eddie for not actually unrequited with steve scared of defining their relationship bexause he doesn’t want to be rejected but their friendship is super affectionate and closer than his previous friendships <3

Okay, finally getting around to doing some of the prompts in my inbox. But I gotta admit, I may not have gone the way that this was supposed to. It's still good, but I'm unsure. Thank you for the prompt!! <3

Tags: Getting Together, Love Confessions, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Unrequited Love, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Mutual Pining, Yearning, Domestic, Bisexual Eddie Munson, Friends to Lovers, Steve Harrington Has a Crush on Eddie Munson, Steve Harrington Loves Eddie Munson, Insecure Steve Harrington, First Kiss, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Hand Holding, Back of Hand Kisses (My Love)

💕—————💕 He brushes away a stray hair from Eddie’s face and wonders, not for the first time, when they got so close on the couch.

Steve knows that he’s doomed. There’s something in his relationship with Eddie that’s new, unspoken, treacherous. And he suspects that it started with the gentle touches. The way his fingers move over the frizz on Eddie’s curls and how he can map all the scars on their torsos. He’s aware of all the noises Eddie makes in his sleep and how their legs lock into each other under his comforter. He knows where Eddie is, based solely on the echoing steps his feet make. If they move soft, he’s in his socks, moving through the hallways to avoid waking Steve up.

There a lot of things he knows about Eddie, in fact.

Coffee with three teaspoons of sugar and a splash of milk. All laundry dried, except for his jeans; and he’s allergic to the Tide, but not Gain. He brushes his teeth with Arm & Hammer, flosses twice a day, and uses spearmint mouthwash only at night. Every Tuesday between 7pm-9pm, he allots time in his schedule just for campaign planning; he needs to be reminded to eat dinner on those days, so Steve always makes something and sits with him until he’s done. Sometimes they hold each other’s hands, a reminder, Steve supposes. Eddie enjoys pepperoni and olives on his pizza, and will gladly take Steve’s olives. He takes his eggs scrambled with cheese, but colby jack, not the Kraft American slices. Bees are his mortal enemy and just one sting would upend him in the hospital. His skin burns easy in the summer, so he applies double the sunscreen, and Steve has done this all before. He has freckles on his back, over his shoulders, up the sides of his neck, on his face. Steve likes to try and count them, but loses track the moment Eddie giggles or smiles.

When he comes over to watch a movie, he always slouches on the right cushion and lets Steve wrap around his left side. He prefers sci-fi over action, but action over romance, but romance over sad dramas. His favorite animals are cats and will adamantly refuse to watch or listen to anything involving that said animal dying. If silences stretch for too long, Eddie taps his fingers over the shapes of his rings, though never slides them off his fingers. He tapes his rings because they’re too big to fit naturally—they were hand-me-downs from his grandpa on his mom’s side, a last gift given before he passed. His mom smelt like Love’s Baby Soft, so when he’s having a particularly bad day, he sprays his pillows with an old bottle he kept. (It’s almost empty and Steve already bought a new one for when it runs out, he just has to have the gall to give it to him.)

Eddie runs cold. Eddie wears three layers all the time—at least. Eddie speaks softly when it’s just the two of them. Eddie always looks at him. Eddie listens to him. Eddie, Eddie, Eddie.

That’s all Steve’s brain is.

And he knows that it’s too much for them to just be friends. But that’s all they are.

He doesn’t want that to be the case, but when he gets the chance to open his mouth and finally say something, it’s like the words die half-way out of his chest. Because Eddie’s like him, in some ways, trying to find the right person, not finding that person, going out and trying again. He hooks-up with girls on the weekdays and goes out to seedy bars on the weekends. His collarbones are sometimes riddled with hickeys; when Steve chances a glance at him, when he’s shirtless and getting ready to share the bed, before he gets in the pool, when he’s a little too warm, when he wants Steve to apply the sunscreen, when he wants fingers tracing the edges of his scars—when he wants to talk about something that went wrong with the girl.

Like tonight.

Eddie’s on his couch. Hair in his face. Shirt off.

He leans too far into Steve’s side, even if it means nothing. He laughs and places a palm on the center of Steve’s back. He shoves his cheek against the side of Steve’s face and whispers hot and harsh on his ear, wet and warm and soothing, all too close—and Steve can smell him. Musk and sweat and Love’s Baby Soft and citrus and Irish Spring and a little like marijuana. He laughs again and stumbles into Steve’s side and places his head on the nook of his shoulder. He calls Steve sweetheart and squeezes his hand.

He always does, though. All of this. He always is this. Too much and too affectionate and too sweet and too ‘Steve’s type.’

Steve can’t take his eyes off of Eddie. Wondering, not for the first time, when he’ll just say what he needs to.

“I think you’re beautiful,” Steve wants to say, “I think you’re kind. I think you’d look good underneath me on my bed. I think I like when you wear my clothes whenever you stay over. I think I’d make you breakfast forever if it meant you’d sit at my table. I think I love you, Eddie. Eddie, god, I think I love you.”

They’re just friends, though. Nothing less.

Nothing more.

And Steve’s afraid of the nuance of this friendship he has. Is it better to never say a thing? Or should he rip the bandaid off and eventually plaster it over his broken heart the moment Eddie rejects him?

Because, as is, all Eddie talks about is girls. Girls with tattoos. Girls with nerd interests. Girls with wild makeup. Girls.

And Steve, noticeably, is not a girl.

He’s none of what Eddie is seeking. Nothing of what he wants. What he desires.

“I don’t know,” Eddie sighs, “she just isn’t the one.”

Steve grunts. “That makes no sense,” he softly exclaims, elbowing Eddie. Washing in the hiss and smirk that Eddie gives him. He’d bathe in whatever Eddie handed to him, if only to have him here, like this, all the time. “It just…You say she’s perfect under you. You say she’s funny and sweet and beautiful. You say all these nice things about this girl, but she isn’t the one? None of that makes sense to me, Eds.”

Eddie’s gaze on him shifts then, something more distant and pained. His fingers splayed over Steve’s thighs, they flex and flatten and tickle. He twists his mouth. And swallows hard, enough to flex the muscles of his neck. “Yeah, I guess I did,” he murmurs. Then, he leans in further. Further, somehow, always further.

And something in Steve wilts. Because, “This isn’t fair.”

“What?” Eddie mutters, brows furrowing. “What’s not fair, Stevie?” He blinks and Steve’s immediately in a daze. His eyelashes are long and dark and creating soft shadow under his eyes. His cheeks are flushed with rosacea pink blush. And has an overwhelming amount of sweet, sugary softness in his stare—enough that Steve’s stomach stirs nauseously.

“This,” Steve whispers. He wrenches his hand away from where it, on an automatic shift, went to trace Eddie’s scars—especially the one closest to him, a wide and silvery one over his left ribs. The one that’s smooth under Steve’s touch.

Nervously, Eddie chuckles. His hand instinctively tightens over Steve’s leg. “Sweetheart, I don’t—“

“That’s what I’m talking about!” Steve exclaims, finally jumping apart. He stands shakily from his couch and faces where he sat, towering over Eddie’s stupidly big, soft eyes and his gentle scowl and the flush of his pale skin. His shadow draws his attention towards the highlights over Eddie, the light yellow on his irises and the glint of scars and that shiny silver of his decade old rings. “This thing you’re doing. The—The—Flirting!”

“Flirting?” Eddie innocently asks. He blinks again, owlishly this time.

“Yes, Eddie! Flirting! You do it all the time…You—You always call me sweetheart and you’re always touching me and…” But he takes in Eddie’s face again. How pretty he is. How stupidly endearing every aspect of him is. And he—

God, Steve can’t do this. He can’t ruin this.

“…Never mind,” he mutters, “don’t worry about it.” And he sits back down. A noticeable gap between them.

“Steve?”

He shakes his head. But otherwise remains silent.

“Steve,” Eddie calls again, softly. So small that it could’ve been lost inside the couch cushions. “Do you not like when I do those things?”

“I like them,” Steve can at least admit. “I don’t mind.”

But Eddie doesn’t touch him again. He looks away, Steve can sense it, even with his own eyes facing forward. His t-shirt is put back on, Steve can see every movement Eddie makes and knows exactly what part of his body he’s using and what exactly he’s doing.

And then they’re just silent.

Maybe he’s already ruined it. He always knew that everything would fall through the moment he admitted anything. The moment he made some sort of realization. And it’s not like the crush was unprecedented. It was slow. Small things, at first. Other things, when time gave way to them. He catalogued everything. And he knew, the moment he learned to touch Eddie where it mattered most—over his scalp and the scars and down the slope of his nose—he was already falling in love.

Of course he’s in love with one of his best friends.

He’s always in love with a best friend. Always somebody that becomes unattainable. First, it was Tommy and then Tommy started dating Carol. Then, it was Nancy and they were great, but then she wanted Jonathan. After, it was Robin and he’s fine with not having Robin in that way, thank god not in that way. He should’ve seen it coming when Eddie stuck around.

He should’ve known. Why didn’t he know?

But if he spoke, Eddie would find a reason to not love him back. That was the scary part. Tommy—he couldn’t see it. Nancy—she never loved him, not really. Robin—well, that one goes left unsaid. What would Eddie find? Would he realize how clingy Steve is? Would he become embarrassed by Steve’s romance movie type of love: drive-in dates and sweet kisses on the lips and slow embraces that lasted forever? Would he come to terms with having nothing in common, despite having everything to talk about as friends? Would he get bored? Would he just…fizzle out?

Steve can imagine it all. Becoming boring. Becoming uninteresting. Becoming unlovable.

Not being desirable.

That’s all he wants. To be desired the way he desires. All too much. All at once. Like flames engulfing the world. He wants and he wants and he wants.

But if he spoke, he’d have to continue wanting—though from an arm’s length. Because Eddie would leave, probably. Turn him down. Realize the truth about Steve Harrington.

The boy everybody wants, but nobody loves.

He’d still want Eddie, though, even if he realized.

“I didn’t know—“

“Eddie,” Steve murmurs, “you don’t have to…Don’t do this with me. Just ignore it. Please, Eds, just ignore it.”

Gentle fingers on the back of his hand. Pushing the skin upward, towards his knuckles. “And if I didn’t want to ignore it?” Eddie asks. So soft. So small.

Steve blinks, his eyes wet and his throat burning. “Don’t—“ He takes a shuttering breath as Eddie’s palm wraps around his whole hand. “Eddie, please,” he pleads, “don’t do this if you don’t mean it.”

Eddie’s hand flexes, squeezing. “Steve,” he murmurs, “look at me?”

Hesitantly, and oh so slowly, Steve makes his head move. He catches Eddie’s eyes, the first thing he always notices when they’re together, and melts. They’re like voids, pulling Steve in. A warm void, though. A hot bath. He raises their joined hands to his lips. They’re a little dry, soft and warm over Steve’s skin.

“I want to mean it,” Eddie quietly confesses.

“But,” Steve mutters, “but what about all those girls?”

“They’re not the one,” Eddie says, “they’re not you.”

“Oh.”

Oh.

Eddie gazes at him now. The way love interests do in all the movies Steve’s ever loved. With a softness like that of cat backs, the ones Eddie likes. With warmth like that of Eddie’s dried laundry. With sweetness like that of Eddie’s morning coffee. His lips are pressed into the back of Steve’s hand again.

“They’re not you,” Eddie reiterates. “They aren’t sweet to me, they aren’t gentle or funny in those silent ways you are. And they aren’t handsome with your good hair. Or warm against me. I’m with them and all I can think about is coming back to you, talking to you, holding you, laying next to you. All I think about is you.”

Steve raises his free hand to the right side of Eddie’s face. Cups his cheek, runs his thumb over his cheekbone, tangles his fingers in the hair above his ear. “You’re all I think about, too,” Steve admits. “Even when I’m hanging out with you, I’m still thinking about you.” He smiles back at the received soft one Eddie has. His dimples have never looked this good. And his mouth is plenty kissable. His face is warm and pink under Steve’s hand.

So he leans in, slowly, enough for everything to be taken back. For him to wake up from this possible dream. And when there’s nothing left to do but lean forward that extra millimeter, Steve kisses him.

Eddie tastes like pepperonis and olives and spearmint. He’s focused completely, kissing back with enough force to make Steve nearly fall backwards. His lips move as if devouring. Steve hopes he tastes just as good.

“I love you,” Eddie confesses first. “I’ve loved you for…a fucking long time.”

Steve, the hopelessly hopeful romantic that he is, melts. “I love you, too,” he breathes.

“Boyfriends?” Eddie asks, smirking, but not teasing.

He nods. “Yeah, Eds. Wanna be your boyfriend.” Something more. God, they're something more.

💕—————💕

#stranger things #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #unrequited love #not actually unrequited #angst and hurt/comfort #getting together

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kunikida-spotted · 3 days

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hi hi!! since you like kunikida, i feel like you’re the right person to ask :D

how do you think kunikida would act/show care for people around him? the ada for example.

i’m writing a fic about how kunikida silently shows his care for the agency, but i tend to struggle with characterisation so i need your thoughts. because he obviously cares for the ada members a lot, but i don’t know how to portray it in a way that’s not too “soft” or “goody-two shoes” while still making it clear that he does love these people.

sorry if this is out of the blue lol :’) ty for your time!!

ACKKK THANK YOU FOR ASKING!!

I love analyzing characters 😼

this is going to be a long one. I do not apologize because I love kunikida

also tumblr ate this ask so I found this in my notifs and not my ask box

(also I want the fic please please please I want to read it please)

Some things are canon (first few) others aren't.

We already have seen a few ways he shows care for members!!

Dazai;

-Calling daily. It's in his schedule to call Dazai. And to make sure he's coming into work.

-Telling Dazai he can always vent if he needs to.

-"You were so talented. I couldn't have asked for a better partner."

-Buys Dazai food. Also Kunikida makes food for Dazai. (not canon but hey. he would and you know it)

-They banter a lot, but we still know Kunikida cares.

-Kunikida listens to Dazai (Dazai rambles a lot)

-Also hugs. A lot of hugs. Like he just gives him hugs. Kunikida will hold Dazai and rock him, idc what anyone says.

Atsushi; (I've realized this is all canon info and not personal headcanons)

-Praise. He does respect Atsushi, especially after he saved Kyoka. (After saving Kyoka, he praised him by saying 'good job')

-Yes he gives Atsushi lectures and reminders.

-Kunikida is proud of everything Atsushi has done. He compliments Atsushi's work (Kunikida compliments everyone for their work btw)

-Kunikida trains Atsushi!!

-Also let's not forget the hug they shared during the reunion.

Ranpo; (this is also all canon..)

-Kunikida praises Ranpo often. Like really often.

-"We'll be counting on you, Ranpo-san."

-"The ideal detective— no, in fact, the ideal ability user."

-Even after learning about Ranpo not being gifted, he still acts like Ranpo is.

-They do have a close bond. Ranpo has told Kunikida that he's the strongest. Ranpo also supports Kunikida, and tells him to stay calm and act like Fukuzawa during the cannibalism arc. (This is more about Ranpo, but still it shows they're close enough to say this stuff to each other)

Yosano;

-Respect! He does respect Yosano just like the other members.

-He surrendered his own life for Yosano's. This was because of the Hunting Dogs. (this goes along with respect)

-He knows Yosano's schedule. Take that as you will.

-Kunikida fully believes that Yosano can always help him no matter the injury. He doesn't care if he's injured because he knows Yosano can help him.

-Because of that one, I'd believe that he'd do a lot for Yosano as thanks. Gift giving, hugs, whatever Yosano is comfortable with.

Kyoka;

-Kunikida is very kind towards Kyoka. He opens up to her after her entrance exam. Which we can see the differences in the anime and manga.

-Kunikida gives lots of advice to Kyoka. He does the same for Atsushi. I'd say this is because he's technically a "higher up" because he joined before the two of them.

-He has also given Kyoka a page of his notebook in case of emergency while Kyoka was trying to save Atsushi. (canon)

-Definitely helps her with tasks. If she's struggling, no she isn't, Kunikida is right there.

-Headpats!! And he gives her stuffed animals as gifts.

-Did I mention that he definitely carries a stuffed animal on him at all times just so he can give it to Kyoka? Because he 100% does (prove me wrong challenge) (level impossible)

Kenji;

-Kunikida actually knows a lot about Kenji. Specifically his ability and the way he acts with others.

-Unfortunately there aren't many interactions of the two.

-However, I think Kunikida would do everything Kenji wants. Not just because he's a higher up/ superior, but also because he has a weakness to Kenji. nobody wants Kenji angry.

-Both can easily give bone crushing hugs, so I think it's easier for them to hug each other than to hug other people.

-Yes Kunikida buys Kenji food. Yes he gives Kenji blankets for when he falls asleep. Asagiri told me himself trust me

-Kenji and Kyoka play with stuffed animals and dolls/ toy animals. Kunikida now keeps some random toys and animals with him just to calm them down.

-Kunikida also buys Kenji stuffed animals because he realized Kyoka liked them and Kenji seemed to want them as well.

Junichiro;

-Canonically, they do trust each other!

-I think Kunikida treats him to food a lot. Just as a little treat.

-Also praise. If we know he canonically can give praise then he should praise Junichiro for his hard work.

-Junichiro likes physical touch (my opinion) so I think Kunikida gives him hugs and pats on the back.

-Like you know that thing people do where they pat someone's back and then rub it? That's literally Kunikida to anyone I think. Just mainly Atsushi and Junichiro.

Naomi;

-I don't think they've like canonically interacted?

-Also treats Naomi to food. Just mainly sweets because she loves sweets.

-Hugs. The Tanizaki siblings love physical touch. That's their number one love language.

-Pats on the head for good work.

Haruno;

-They don't hang out much. But he will visit her.

-Daily check ups. He just visits her or goes to her during work and asks if everythings okay. (I think he does this to everyone, just a headcanon)

-Also headpats. At this point he has probably patted every single person's head at some point. Except for Fukuzawa (out of respect for him)

Fukuzawa;

-He has a lot of respect for him. We know this.

-Asking how his day was, making sure he's okay.

-Buying/ making him tea.

-Taking him out for food or drinks, whatever Fukuzawa is preferring in the moment.

-Hugged him once. Was horrified about it. Was also embarrassed because he didn't even mean to like it just happened.

-Fukuzawa didn't mind and hugged him back. This only made Kunikida more embarrassed. Also I think Kunikida's face and ears go read when he's embarrassed.

Katai; (if you're including him)

-They've known each other for ten years. They know each other well.

-Kunikida visits him often. Normally he reminds him to do chores, or does the chores himself.

-Kunikida encourages Katai to go outside. He'll also tell Katai to try going out without his futon.

-They're very close! Kunikida knows basically everything about Katai, and knows how to help him out.

-Kunikida praises Katai. (all above canon and this too)

-Kunikida makes food for Katai. I think he does it because Katai doesn't eat healthy food often.

-Kunikida and Katai cuddle. Trust me guys (whatt I'm definitely not a kunikatai shipper hahaa that'd be so weird..)

-Kunikida tries to go out with Katai but because Katai is a hikikomori it's pretty hard to do.

-Kunikida listens to all of Katai's ramblings on literally anything. Katai will listen about Kunikida's ideals too.

-Kunikida gives Katai words of affection a lot. Katai is insecure and Kunikida knows. That is why.

----------------

Unintentionally he will headpat people at the agency. Like "Good work." and then suddenly his hand his on their head and he pats it. Not even for a specific reason, he's just did it so frequently to the younger members and now it happens to everyone.

He takes everyone out for food/ drinks seperately, just so they can have a little bonding moment.

----------------

This definitely didn't take like two or three days tee hee

Lots of tags because this took a lot of time

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd kunikida #bsd dazai #bsd atsushi #bsd fukuzawa #bsd armed detective agency #bsd headcanons #bsd analysis #bsd ranpo #bsd yosano #bsd kyouka #bsd kenji #bsd junichiro #bsd katai #kunikida spotted!#kunikida rambles

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laura1633 · 1 day

Note

Lestappen positivity

Is it just me that I have a thing for Max voice? Like his voice is sooooo cute and his accent and the way he can’t spell the s properly. I think he purrs a lot when he’s with Charles and the first time he does this is when they’re fucking for the first time and he got embarrassed bc he wanted to act manly in front Charles but Charles loses his mind about the purring because it’s just so hot and cute. I like to think that Max thought that he’s gonna top but turns out to be the perfect cutest bottom with the cutest sounds when he’s being fucked

It's definitely not just you anon, I love his voice too, it's adorable. Thank you so much for spreading some lovely Lestappen positivity.

Yes love Max purring!! I think it would be super interesting if Max was adamant that he was a top because he (incorrectly) had the impression it was more masculine and he thought Charles would prefer that.

Perhaps Charles is the opposite where he think people want him to bottom because that is just what previous partners have wanted without really asking him. It's fine, it's just not his preference.

They end up admitting that they actually would like to try it the other way around... and then they never look back! Max absolutely loves bottoming and can't stop moaning the first time he tries it. He's shaking and grabbing hold of Charles and just really overwhelmed in the most amazing way. He also realises that bottoming has nothing to do with being less masculine or being submissive (although he realises that he happens to also love being a little submissive 👀)

Charles loves getting to top and listening to all the beautiful noises Max makes when he opens him up and fucks him. He especially loves how Max seems to get more and more comfortable and confident bottoming.

#laura1633 mature asks #Bottom Max #Top Charles

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ddodol · 8 hours

Text

bedache — l.cy

drabble ⭑.ᐟ synopsis ⭑.ᐟ nothing better than spending mundane birthdays with anton. word count⭑.ᐟ 0.3k+

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂☆

✩🎧⭑.ᐟ [ bedache — christian leave ]

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂☆

anton snuggled up to you, pulling you even closer as he buried his head against your chest. you let him be, smiling as you feel his warmth against your body.

”happy birthday, baby.”

you giggle at the greeting, playing with his hair as he hums. it was your birthday today but you spent all day in bed with anton, just cuddled up at today's unusually cold weather. you actually couldn’t have wished for a better way to spend it, just having anton in your arms was enough. you’ve learnt how to get less greedy as you got older, appreciating all the little things as you fear other more important adulting matters.

”you’re so old now,” you playfully tug his hair at the comment, making him laugh and kiss your neck as an apology. “says the one who had their birthday months before mine, dumbass.” anton just smiles, eyes closed as he listened to your voice.

something about spending time with anton just like this made you happy. getting older was always a scary experience, especially since there were still so many things you’ve yet to learn but being in anton’s arms made all those worries melt away somehow.

anton pulled away, looking at you with a huge smile on his face. you chuckle, poking his cheek as he just stared at you so lovingly. anton always had his way of making you feel so loved even without having to say it, one that brings you great comfort and a sense of security.

”are you scared, y/n?” he asked quietly, hands gently patting you as he waited for your reply. you give him a small smile, “it’s always scary, toni.” anton kissed your lips, trailing kisses all over your face. you knew it was his way of comforting you, smiling as you melt into his little kisses.

”i want to keep spending more birthdays with you if it means i get to receive more kisses,” you teased as anton chuckled against your ear.

”you can, just stay with me and i’ll do the same.” anton’s voice was so sweet, slowly melting all of your thoughts away as you sink into his arms. “i love you, anton,” you whisper.

”i love you too, baby,” he smiled widely, “even though you’re so old now.” you laugh at the comment, slapping his shoulder playfully.

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂☆

a/n; happy birthday if there's anyone celebrating

#riize #riize imagines #riize scenarios #riize x reader #riize soft hours #anton #anton lee #anton imagines #anton scenarios #anton x reader #૮ > ⤙ < ྀིა #ddolfluffs #his name is anton #just a chill drabble for today

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measuredingold · 2 days

Text

to be in love and to be loved

chapter five: the liars club

authors note: helllooo ! i meant to post this last night but forgot... oops ! anyways, new chapter yay ! it was fun writing this and it's mainly in noah's pov. some parts hurt me to write so sorry for any pain caused ? feelings are just hard to figure out. anyways, as always enjoy and feedback is always appreciated :)

pairing: noah sebastian x ofc x nicholas ruffilo

masterlist / cross-posted on ao3

word count: 8.6k

cw: ~kissing~, angst, feelings not being understood, someone (noah) is stubborn and emotional, some yelling during an argument, sexual identity crisis has begun lol, 18+ (minors do not interact.)

Noah wakes up the next morning confused, with a raging fucking headache, and alone. It freaks him out at first, the feeling of the cold bed sheets against his fingertips when he reaches out causing his heart rate to spike, but then he sees his bedroom door ajar. His heart slows down, only briefly, and he groans as he wipes a hand down his face.

If he's being completely honest, he feels like he got run over about 50 times last night by a goddamn bus, and he can't even remember it. How much did he drink last night? With another groan he rolls over in his bed, face burying into the pillow next to him. He tries to sort through his mind around what exactly happened yesterday, but the only things he can remember are the moments leading up to the bar and then… nothing.

He remembers being on edge all day, freaked out of his fucking mind because he needed everything to go exactly as he planned because if it didn't he'd probably lose it. This wasn't their first show, no, but this was their first album. First time people were coming out to a show to see them specifically, excited to listen to the album they'd been anticipating for months now. He almost made himself sick at one point yesterday.

He remembers that it went way better than he ever expected. The crowd's energy was something he'd never experienced before, and there was no better feeling than having people actually sing your words back to you. He's been working at this for so long and he finally feels like this is exactly where he's supposed to be. Making music for people like him, searching for something that makes them feel like they belong.

Then he remembers all the congratulations, the pictures, the first few shots at the bar... and that's about it.

He's sure it was just a regular night out for them - throwing back shots and enjoying each other's company - but there's this nagging feeling in the pit of his stomach telling him he's missing something important. He doesn't dwell on it for too long, thought fleeting the very second Naomi steps back into his room.

Wet curls wrapped up in a towel on top of her head, adorn in one of his old shirts that he's sure she had stolen years ago. All warm and clean and probably smelled amazing, like lavender. One of her favorite scents. He remembers her telling him that it was a smell that brought her comfort, easing her anxiety. She shuts the door behind her quietly and he assumes it's because she thinks he's still asleep, and his assumption was correct when she turned around and yelped.

"Shit!"

Noah can't help but laugh, pressing his face further into the pillow.

"You suck." Naomi whines out, but he can hear the smile in her voice. "I thought you were asleep."

"I just woke up." He grumbles, followed by a yawn, and flops onto his back. "I thought you were gone."

Her gaze softens as she makes her way towards the bed, and Noah waits for her to sit before throwing an arm around her waist, face burying against her thigh. He practically purrs at the feeling of her fingers immediately tangling in his hair and his eyes flutter shut. He could fall back asleep just like this.

"Why'd you think I was gone?"

"Bed was empty and cold." His voice was muffled as he pressed his face further into her thigh, wanting to be as close as possible. "Thought you left me."

"I would never." He hears Mimi hum above him, and he smiles to himself at the giggle she lets out. She scratches at his scalp again and it takes everything in him to not moan out in pleasure, the feeling having his eyes flutter shut again.

Seriously, if it weren't the consistent pounding behind his eyes, he would've fallen back asleep already.

"Head hurts." Noah grumbles, reluctantly pulling away from her to bury his face against the pillow beside her legs. "How much did I drink last night?"

"You don't remember?" There's something behind her voice, an edge that wasn't there before, and if he wasn't battling this headache right about now he'd question it, but doesn't.

Instead he shakes his head, sighing out, "No. I don't really remember much."

The silence that follows doesn't make the ever growing pit in his stomach ease any at all, and there's a nagging voice in the back of his mind telling him something happened and he needs to remember it now, but he's so tired. He'll try to remember later. He feels Naomi shift next to him and clear her throat, and he peeks open an eye to watch her get up off the bed.

"I'll get you some water and Ibuprofen, okay? Fix that headache of yours." She's speaking so fast, that edge still there, and it has Noah opening both of his eyes, propping himself up on his elbows.

"Okay."

His stomach drops at the smile she gives him, one that doesn't quite meet her eyes and very much strained before she slips out the door. He falls back the second it shuts, eyes trained to the ceiling. What happened last night that has Mimi acting so... weird? He tries to search through his hazy memories of the night before but nothing comes up. It's as if whatever happened was completely wiped from his memory.

He tries telling himself that it's nothing, that he just drank way too much and maybe said something a bit out there in front of too many people and that's why Naomi is acting weird. Maybe she doesn't want to embarrass him? He knows he can say some outlandish shit when he's drinking. He covers his face with his arm, groaning quietly to himself.

Everything’s fine. It was nothing... right?

...

Something's off.

Noah would say these last few days have been fine, great even. The response to their album was amazing, people were loving it. In hindsight, everything was literally perfect. Except... it wasn't? He couldn't exactly put a finger on it, but the uneasiness from a few days ago still lingered, making a home in the pit of his stomach.

Naomi had been acting weird still, though he thinks she seemed more on edge than anything. He assumed it was because she was leaving tomorrow, and the edge was the sadness seeping out into the real world. He tried his best to mask his own sadness, hating that he has to see her leave again, but he's telling himself that they won't go as long without seeing the other again. That'll make it easier.

Jolly seems to be normal. Nothing off balance with the Swede. He’s always been kind of odd, anyways. Folio the same way. Now that he thinks about it, those two actually seem to really be the only people he's encountered the last few days. His brows furrow as his mind thinks back to the last few days, glimpses of the interactions slipping through his mind.

The more he thinks about it, the more he realizes the only people who truly seemed off were... Naomi and Nicholas. His stomach turns, the unease creeping through his veins when he realizes he's barely seen Nicholas at all since their album release.

He's barely left his room, door shut at all times, and Noah tries to think of the times he's even seen the male leave. His mind races, thinking of all the possibilities on why Nicholas was being weird, barely leaving his room and speaking to anyone - especially Noah - and for some reason his mind always wanders back to the damn bar that he still can't fucking remember.

Why can't he remember?

Something settles in his bones, something like... fear? He's not sure what he's even scared of. Maybe it was the not knowing. If he could just fucking remember what happened that night, maybe it could give him some sort of insight on what happened and why everyone is being so fucking weird and -

"Noah?"

His eyes moved from the television, stuck on some Netflix show he definitely had not been watching to Naomi, who was standing near the couch. She looked... anxious, for better words. Face flushed, brows furrowed, lips turned down into a frown. It's as if she was in pain, but he knew she wasn't. He knew her better than he knew himself sometimes, and he knew there was something on her mind. His stomach turns painfully.

"Yeah?" He clears his throat when his voice breaks at the end, lips pursing. "What's up?"

Naomi chews on her bottom lip, hands wringing in front of her. "...Can we talk?"

Those three words punch Noah in the chest. Can we talk? That could mean so many things. So many things that scare him, that make him think oh no, something's wrong and that the worst is about to come. He's heard it so many times before in the past, he just never expected it to be from her.

"Oh." He swallows, a lump now forming in his throat and he nods. "Yeah. Of course."

She doesn't seem to spot his panic right away and he realizes maybe he's getting better at his poker face, and comes to sit next to him. She's so close, so fucking close, but Noah feels like she's never been so far away. Their legs are brushing but she feels worlds away, not even braving a glance at him.

He's going to be fucking sick.

Something is wrong and he doesn't know what and he swears it has something to do with that god forsaken bar he can't remember anything about. Something happened there that made her far, out of reach, and it was obviously so bad that Nicholas won't even talk to him, and... God.

She's going to break up with him before she leaves.

He doesn't realize he's panting until he feels Naomi's fingers wrap around his wrists, breaking him from his thoughts.

"Hey, look at me." She sounds farther away, but she's right there, and Noah slowly manages to gaze at her. "There you are. Can you breathe with me? In, out. In, out. Just like that."

He tries to match her breathing, really does, and it isn't until he feels her nails lightly scratching against the inside of his wrists that he feels himself come back to himself. His breathing is still a bit ragged, and he thinks his eyes are burning just a bit but he blinks whatever it is away. They sit in silence for a little while longer and Noah really focuses on the way her nails feel against his skin and how soothing it actually is, and her steady breathing.

"...I'm guessing you already know what I want to talk about?" Naomi finally speaks after a few moments of bated silence.

Noah can't exactly read her, the look in her eyes something he's never seen from her before. Was it fear? He doesn't know exactly why she would be scared, but the voice in the back of his head is yelling at him because he knows what this is about. The nagging feeling, the deep pit in his tummy... this was it. He swallows away the lump building in the base of his throat, head nodding slowly.

"You want to break up."

He says it so definitely, his stomach dropping because this is it. This is what she's doing. This is why she's been so weird the last few days because she didn't know how to do it and let him down easy. He doesn't bother looking at Naomi, instead moves his gaze on his lap because he can't bear to see her right now. See the pitying gaze she's probably giving him, her eyes indicating that yes, this is over.

"What?"

He finally moves his gaze up to hers and pauses at how bewildered she looks, eyes wide with confusion, full lips dipping further into a frown. This almost angers him, almost, because how dare she look confused. His head tilts to the side, eyes searching her face.

"That's what this is about, right?"

"No, baby, that's..." She sighs, brows furrowing again as her head tilts to the side. "That's not even remotely close to what I wanted to talk about."

Noah pauses again, mind racing at her words. What did she want to talk about then, if not this? He feels her hand slip to his cheek, turning his head back to face her.

"Noah," She sighs out, frowning again, "Why would you even think that?”

He doesn't know how to respond so he shrugs instead, staring at her. Naomi scoots closer to him, their legs now pressing together, and he focuses on her bare skin against his rather than her pleading eyes.

"Baby..." Another sigh follows her words. "Talk to me. What's going on in that head of yours?"

"I don't know." He eventually says, but doesn't dare to look up at her. "You've just been acting weird. Felt like I did something wrong, I don't know."

He rushes his words out, feeling his cheeks heat up at the confession. He was never good at expressing how he felt, how things bothered him. Never wanted to be a burden, too scared of the things that he may say ruining whatever he had going for him. In his time of knowing Mimi, loving Mimi, he's had to come to terms with the fact he just can't do that with her. She insists that he talk about his feelings, always telling him communication is one of her top priorities in any relationship she has - platonic and romantic. That infamous therapy talk of hers.

It was hard for Noah at first, and it still really fucking is, but he tries. He tries his hardest because he doesn't want to let her down.

"You didn't do anything wrong, baby." She's quick to respond, reaching out to place her hand on his thigh. He watches the way her fingers flex around his thigh, trying to calm down his heart that still seems to be racing. "You did nothing wrong, okay?"

"Then what's this about?" Noah doesn't stop the words from leaving him and he doesn't think twice before flicking his gaze up to hers, brown eyes round and wide. "Because when someone says they need to talk, it's usually nothing good."

He knows it's just the anxiety talking, whatever she's wanting to talk about eating at him because what the fuck could it be? If not that, then what else is there to talk about that's made her so... weird?

"Do you remember Davis' birthday that year I couldn't go? I had to work."

He nods. "Yeah. Barely."

"Right." Naomi rolls her lips before speaking again. "Do you remember almost kissing Nick that night?"

As soon as she said it, the memory came back to him almost instantly. It was pretty shaky, the memory of Nicholas in front of him blurry, but he remembers that exact moment like it was fucking yesterday. They both drank absolutely way too much and the way Nicholas' cheeks were tinted red from the alcohol was... nice. So nice in fact Noah couldn't stop looking at him or his lips, and remembers wondering what it would be like to kiss his best friend.

His heart pounds against his chest and he swallows down whatever lump was stuck in his throat, gazing back at Mimi.

"...Not really."

Lie.

"Noah-"

"Okay, yes. I do. Sort of." He pauses to catch his breath, already feeling himself get worked up. "What's that have to do with anything? That was two years ago."

He hates the way she's staring at him, eyes narrowed but still gentle, as if she can see right through him, because she can. She's always been able to read him since the day they met.

"I never knew that until you mentioned it at the bar."

His eyes widened at that. He got so drunk that night that he confessed to his girlfriend that he almost kissed their best friend?

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

"I'm sorry. It was forever ago, before we were together, it didn't mean-"

"Noah." She drops her hand from his face and holds it up, and Noah stops in the middle of his sentence, lips pressing together as he watches her. "It's okay. I don't care."

"Oh." He feels himself sink back against the couch, relief filling his body.

Okay. Cool. She didn't care. That was good, right?

"Yeah." Naomi's voice trails and she stares off to the side, as if trying to find her next words. "Well, um. After you... mentioned that, you... Um."

Noah's eyes narrow at her. In the three years he has known Mimi, she wasn't one to stumble over her words. Usually that was his and Nicholas' jobs, stumbling through their sentences and Naomi helping them along the way.

"I... what?" His arms cross over his chest.

"You..." There was another pause and she finally looked back at him, lips pressed in a line. "We kissed."

His brows furrow. "...Okay?"

"All three of us. Kissed."

Oh.

Fuck.

Oh fuckfuckfuck.

“What?” He didn’t intend for his voice to come off so loud but he couldn’t help it, because what the actual fuck did she just say?

"We kissed."

Right. That's what he heard the first time yet it still doesn't sound fucking real.

What does she mean they kissed? Why the fuck would that ever happen? How did it happen? Noah's gaze tears from Naomi to stare off to the side, too caught up in his own mind to even register that Naomi's gripping his hand, begging him to look at her. His chest feels heavy again, like at least ten tons of weights were just dropped on it.

We kissed. There's no way he actually kissed... no. That couldn't have happened. Noah's stomach turns. He feels hot, almost like he's going to be sick, because this didn't happen. It couldn't have happened. He would've remembered kissing his best friend... or watching his best friend kiss his girlfriend.

His face heats up at the thought.

"...Noah?"

He sucks down a deep breath to try and come back to himself, finally looking back at Mimi. The weight on his chest lifted only slightly as their eyes met once again. He blinks.

"What?"

"Did it..." Naomi pauses and swipes her tongue over her bottom lip, and Noah can't help but follow it. "Did it mean anything?"

Noah tilts his head. "What did?"

"The almost kiss. Between you and Nicky.”

He feels his whole-body freeze, stiffening at the implication of her words. Did it mean anything? What does it matter if it meant anything? It was years ago, back before Naomi, back before Noah knew shit about anything... back when it was just him and Nicholas. Back when the only things that meant a goddamn thing to him was his music and his best friend.

And sure, maybe there had been a time where it may have meant something to him, back when he was still learning himself, all awkward and all limbs. Back when things didn't seem to make much sense besides the fact he loved being around Nicholas, he loved his best friend. He had never really had that type of safety growing up, never felt secure, but when he was bouncing around with Nicholas, sleeping on his family's couch, in his bed, shooting the shit into the wee hours of the night with him, he remembers thinking he could live like this forever as long as it was with Nick.

So yeah, maybe at the time it meant something. Or maybe it was the alcohol in his system that night that made him think that. He doesn’t know. He doesn’t want to know.

He swallows down the lump that was beginning to form in his throat and averts his gaze from Naomi, and he misses the look she gives him. He misses the way her face drops, lips pulling down into a frown, and instead wraps his arms around his middle, curling in on himself.

It didn't mean anything.

It couldn't mean anything.

"No."

It sounded like a lie. His voice wavered and he looked anywhere but Naomi, couldn't dare look at her. He felt... guilty, in a way. That even though this almost kiss was years ago, his skin prickled at the thought of it happening now and how he didn't seem to be to put off by it. His heart pounded against his chest just at the mere thought of their lips brushing and he's frozen in his spot. It happened, just a few nights ago, and he's more upset at the fact he doesn't even fucking remember it.

Why would he even want to kiss Nicholas, anyway? Naomi was his girlfriend, sitting right next to him. She should be the only person he wants to kiss, touch.

"...Are you sure?"

"Of course." He spits out, then flinches because he didn't mean to sound so harsh. He gives Naomi a quick glance before letting his eyes drop again. "Why would it? Nothing even happened, anyways."

Noah knows why. He fucking knows and it makes his stomach turn, throat close up, and he could probably throw up at any fucking second, but he chooses to ignore it, because the truth is too much. It's not like he still doesn't feel the same for Naomi, that's not it at all. She's the first person he's ever loved this hard, ever considered to be serious with, to start a life with. He knows Naomi is his endgame and has always been.

So has Nicholas, he briefly thinks, and has to physically shake his head to put the thoughts away.

They sit in silence for a moment, not uncomfortable, but silence nonetheless and Noah's scared to look at Naomi. Scared to find that she sees through him and his stubbornness, sees through the lies that he spits out, because he doesn't want to think about what'll come after. He can't lose Naomi and the life that they've built together, will build together. He can't lose the stableness she's brought into his life, the love she gives him when sometimes he thinks he doesn't deserve it. He can't lose his best friend - both of them.

So, he'll continue to lie, continue to tell himself and everyone around him that it meant nothing at the time and definitely doesn't mean a goddamn thing now.

"Noah." Naomi's voice is so soft, so gentle, he has to squeeze his eyes shut to will away the burning that it brings. "Baby, look at me."

Her hand is on his arm now and he feels her scoot closer to him, but she's timid, keeping her space. She knows how he gets when he starts to shut down, build the walls back up around himself when things get too complicated because he hates when it starts to feel like that. He's comfortable for the first time in his life and he can't let that slip through his fingers.

He takes a deep breath, then two, then three, and finally opens his eyes to find Naomi staring at him, brows furrowed in concern. Her hand doesn't leave him, and he relaxes ever so slightly at the feel of her thumb rubbing into his skin, trying to calm him down. Usually, she'd do the thing where she rubs at his wrists, gently scratching at the skin to bring him back down to earth like she had done earlier, but she can't with the way he has his arms wrapped around him, hands tucked away at his sides.

"Me and Nicholas had an almost kiss, too. I told you that night but I’m assuming you don’t remember." She starts slowly and her hand moves up his arm to rest against the back of his neck, fingers digging into his skin gently to rub out any tension there. It was helping. "We didn't, though, because of you."

"Me?" He perks up at that, but for some reason his chest aches, heart pounding again.

Why did they stop because of him? Why was he the reason for their kiss ending before it ever even started? The guilt comes back, settling in the pit of his stomach.

Naomi nods. "It didn't feel right... with how I felt about you and...."

She trails off and he can tell she's choosing her words carefully, like she was leaving out something, but he doesn't say anything. Noah swallowed thickly, eyes scanning her face.

"I..." He watches her eyes flutter shut and watches her throat bob as she swallows down whatever fear may linger there. "I wanted to kiss him, but I didn't. Well - he didn't. He asked me what about Noah? and we stopped."

"That doesn't make any sense." The words leave him before he can even think about it. "You shouldn't have stopped because of me."

"Yes, we should have." Her answer was quick, and Noah can only stare at her. "We should have because it wasn't fair to you."

"Why?" He doesn't get it, or... maybe he does, but he refuses to believe what's so obviously in front of him.

"Jesus." Naomi breathes out, a quiet laugh following. "This is a lot harder than I thought it would be."

Her hand drops from his neck to rest back against his arm, and he watches the movements, eyes following her fingers drawing circles, tracing the artwork that was etched across his skin.

"It wasn't fair to you because of how we felt about you." She starts off slowly, eyes dropping down to her hand. "We both cared about you so much then, and still do. At the time it was more confusing, but I think," She takes a deep breath before her eyes find him again. "I think it didn't feel right to do that with you not there. It didn't feel complete."

Complete. They didn't feel complete without him there and that has his stomach turning, as if a thousand butterflies were let off inside of him but he can't seem to be happy about it. It can't mean what he's thinking. He refuses to even believe that because that would mean what he's feeling is true and that's impossible.

How the hell can you love two people at once and it's fine? It sounds fucking selfish.

"I don't..." His words trail off and he has to look away from her, her gaze becoming far too much.

Both of her hands slide back up his neck this time, turning him back to her but he shuts his eyes before their gazes even meet. He's being stubborn, he fucking knows, but it's too much. He can't do this. Not now.

"Noah..."

"What?" He tries to make it sound harsh, but it instead comes out weak, voice cracking at the end. Noah opens his eyes, and the look Naomi is giving him is borderline painful, and he has to swallow down the lump in his throat once again.

"I... liked it when we kissed the other night." She finally starts again, voice barely above a whisper. Noah averts his gaze, eyes dropping to his lap, but her hand doesn't leave his neck. "...And I think you liked it, too."

His stomach is full of twists and turns, a voice in the back of his head telling him that she's right. Even if doesn't remember it he knows he liked it, more than he should have, and his eyes squeeze shut to try and wrack his brain around some type of memory to remind him of how it felt, but nothing comes.

He wishes he could remember, but he can’t. So, he says the first thing that comes to his mind.

"I... I don't know if I liked it." Lie, but he pushes through it.

"...And that's okay. If you don't know." Naomi speaks so carefully, thumbs brushing against his skin as her eyes scan his face. "You don't need to know right now. I just needed you to know."

"And what is it I need to know?"

"That I liked kissing Nicholas. Far more than I probably should." She pauses, sucking in a deep breath. "And that I think you liked it too, but you don't know how to feel about it, and that's completely okay."

They keep their eyes on each other for a moment or two, the silence slowly eating away at him. How could she know that? There's no way she could know that. Hell, Noah barely even knows that. He wishes he could fucking remember what it was like, his lips against Nicholas'. The way it felt when their lips finally met. The way it made him feel in that moment, after waiting for it for so long. He can feel goosebumps rise across his skin just at the mere thought of their lips brushing and his face flushes out of embarrassment.

Naomi doesn't comment on it.

"So," He clears his throat, eyes dropping again. "What does this mean?"

"Nothing. If that's what you want."

Noah's silent, and he doesn't move his gaze from his lap.

"I love you." Naomi presses, and she's leaning forward, lips ghosting over his cheek. "That hasn't changed and will never, ever change. I just... needed to be honest with you." There's another pause in her words and she pulls back, eyes scanning him again. "And I want you to be honest with yourself. It doesn't need to be right now, but whenever you're ready. Okay?"

He swallows thickly again, and he thinks his eyes are burning but he refuses to even acknowledge that. His stomach twists and turns at the implication of her words and he so desperately wishes he could do that, for her, for himself, but he can't. Not yet at least.

So instead, he nods, quietly saying, "I love you."

He hopes that's enough for her, for now, and he thinks it is when she leans in to press their lips together. It's different from the others they've shared, something else is behind it and he can't quite place it, but it only has him pressing harder against her, trying to deepen it. He loves her, with his entire being, and hopes one day he can be honest with her in the way she's wanting.

Maybe.

"Okay." She says once she pulls back, taking a deep breath to come back to herself. Her hands slide up and down his neck and she gives him a small smile, and this time it reaches her eyes. "Wanna help me finish packing?"

Noah nods, finally unwrapping his arms from around himself. "Yeah... I wanna help."

Her smile grows wider at that, and he actually returns it before letting her pull him up and off the couch, dragging him towards his room to finish packing for her flight tomorrow morning. He does his best to ignore the voice in his head screaming at him when they pass Nicholas' room, especially when he catches himself staring at the shut door longingly.

…

He's pissed.

No - he's downright fucking livid.

He'd never seen such heartache in Naomi's face when he told her that Nicholas wouldn't be coming to the airport to drop her off, even though he so clearly was home, holed up in his room. She acted as if it didn't bother her, only for a second, before the tears fell. Noah swore he saw red, never once in his life being so... disappointed in his best friend. He hated anyone that made Naomi upset, and knowing it was Nicholas at the other end of this anger was something Noah's never experienced.

He kept it together for her, even when he kissed her goodbye. Especially when she asked Noah to let Nicholas know that she said goodbye, and that she'll text when she lands. The drive home was excruciating and he swears he broke several traffic laws because he couldn't stop thinking about it. What the fuck was Nicholas' problem?

If he had been so bothered by what happened then he should say that. Noah can take the rejection - it hurts less because he doesn't exactly remember it. At least he thinks it does, but maybe this anger he's feeling is overshadowing the ache in his chest that's yearning to remember what it was like to have Nicholas' lips on his. He barely thinks about it, actually, so consumed by the anger and disappointment rising in him, he slams the front door shut.

No one else is home. Just him, Nicholas, and an empty house. His feet move before he can even think about it, taking him up the stairs and down the hall, second door on the left. Noah swings open Nicholas' door, the latter looking up from his desk, sketch pad placed in front of him. His brows furrow at the sight of Noah, confusion written all over his face and that somewhat pisses off Noah even more.

"What the hell is your problem?"

This surprises Nicholas, eyes widening. "What?"

"Cut the fucking bullshit." This has Nicholas' pressing his lips together and Noah steps into his room, shutting the door behind him. He points over at Nicholas, eyes narrowing. "Mind telling me what's been up your ass this last week?"

Nicholas pauses. "Nothing."

"Sure." Noah scoffs, arms crossing over his chest. "You seriously suck at lying, dude. You always have."

"It's nothing, Noah." Nicholas grumbles, low and annoyed, and he's swinging his chair back around to his desk, staring down at the flash sheet before him. "Just been busy."

"With what?" Noah knows he should keep it down, knowing the other guys are just in the living room, but he can't find it in himself to even care. "We fucking live together, man. I know when you're busy."

Silence.

"She was expecting you to be there, you know." Noah grits out, voice shaking. "Do you know how hard it was to watch her cry? Knowing it was over you? Really fucking hard, Nick. She wanted you there."

Nicholas doesn't say anything to this, but Noah notices the moment his shoulders tense, his actions pausing, before picking his pen up again.

"Oh, so you’re just not gonna say anything? How fucking mature.”

"I don't know what you want from me, Noah." Nicholas sounds defeated as he whips around in his chair, shoulders slumping forward as sad, gray eyes meet Noah's brown ones.

"I want you to tell me what the fuck is going on." He's angry, maybe irrationally so, but he doesn't care. He's pissed, hands shaking at his sides as his eyes narrowed down on his best friend.

"Nothing's going on."

"Stop lying to me!" Noah's voice booms throughout the bedroom and both boys pause, eyes widening.

Noah doesn't yell. In a song, sure, but never ever in conversation. And never at Nicholas. In the years he's known the boy, he can't really remember any argument that they've had that led to a raised voice. It was never like that with him, but maybe things have changed. A lot of things have changed.

He sucks in a deep breath, eyes fluttering shut as he tries to calm himself down. Naomi's voice fills his mind, softly chanting in and out, in and out, in and out. He feels like he's spiraling, the anger and confusion coming to a halt inside his body and not sure how to release. He hates feeling like this, he hates being angry at Nicholas, but he can't help it. He's lying. Noah knows he's lying and he doesn't have a damn clue on why he keeps it up.

"Stop lying." He says softer now, voice wavering. "You don't need to lie."

"Yes, I do."

"If..." In, out. In, out. In, out. "If this is about the stupid fucking kiss from the other night, it's not that big of a deal."

His stomach drops the second those words leave his mouth, and he's sure Nicholas has the same feeling with the way his eyes are widening, staring at him in disbelief.

"I remember - well, Mimi told me. But I know." He pauses. "That's it, isn't it? The kiss? You're being fucking weird because of a stupid kiss?"

It wasn't stupid. Even if he doesn't remember it he knows it wasn't, but he can't seem to stop the words tumbling from his mouth.

"Yes." Nicholas finally grits out, eyes narrowing at him. "It is about the stupid kiss."

"I knew it." Noah laughs and it's such a sad fucking sound, because he doesn't feel any better hearing those words from Nicholas. Actually, he somehow feels worse. "I fucking knew it."

Nicholas laughs now, a crazy sound, and he runs a wild hand through his hair before his arms flail out around him.

"What the fuck do you want to say then, Noah? I mean, since you already know everything." It's Nicholas' turn to narrow his gaze, anger brewing behind his eyes. “I don’t know what you fucking want from me if you already know so much. What’s there to even talk about, huh?”

"I just want you to be honest with me," Noah tries to keep his voice level, but there is another waver towards the end, and he has to curl his hands into fists and squeeze.

In and out, in and out, in and out.

"Honest? You want honesty?" With another laugh that sounds anything but humorful, Nicholas rises from his chair and takes a step closer to Noah. "Do you know how fucking hard it is to watch the person you love be with someone else? And then have them kiss you?”

There it is.

He thinks deep down he knew all along that Nicholas loved Naomi. The more he thought about it - and he's thought about it a lot these last 24 hours - the more it made sense. Noah remembers the longing glances shared between the two, remembers the tension whenever they first met. Maybe he tried convincing himself it was nothing just to justify his own feelings, but it was always clear as day.

Nicholas fucking loved her. His hands shake at the thought and he squeezes them into fists again, fingernails digging into the skin of his palm. It hurts to hear out loud even though he knew. He fucking knew.

But he thinks it hurts more knowing that it's just her, and not him.

"Naomi told me." He manages to get out, swallowing down the lump in his throat. "She told me about the first time you tattooed her. How you guys didn't..." He can't say it fully, taking a deep breath before continuing, "because of me. You spared my feelings because you'd rather, I don't fucking know, deprive yourself of happiness because you didn't want to hurt my feelings?"

Nicholas doesn't say anything again, just stares at him with his lips pressed together and for some reason that angers Noah even more.

"Did you think I couldn't handle it? Her rejection? I could have." He takes a step closer to Nicholas, the other boy watching him carefully. "I would have if it meant that you two were happy. That's all I ever fucking cared about."

They're toe to toe now, not touching just yet but almost there. Nicholas' eyes soften.

"Noah, that's all I cared about, too. That's why I couldn't do it, because of you and-"

"Because of me! That's all I keep hearing. Me, me, me. You didn't know how I'd feel. You didn't know how I'd react. Not once did you even think of yourself, either of you, because for some reason you both are so worried about how I'd feel." The words fall from his lips without much thought and a humorless laugh slips from him, arms moving wildly at his sides. "And now look, you resent me! Probably Mimi, too, because of a choice you made."

Was it harsh? Maybe, but Noah was done letting this shit build up inside of him. If Nicholas wanted to ignore him then goddammit, he was going to get out everything he's been wanting to say for the last two days.

Nicholas looks at Noah now as if he's just grown two heads and for some reason that just makes him angrier. Why is he confused? He doesn't get to act confused, he's the one that's been ignoring them, resenting them, for a choice he made.

"I don't resent you."

"Could've fooled me.”

"I don't-" Nicholas pauses, taking a deep breath and pinching the bridge of his nose. "I don't fucking resent you. I don't resent Mimi, either. If anything I resent myself for being fucking stupid."

It's Noah's turn to be confused, eyes narrowing down at his best friend.

"What?"

Nicholas opens his mouth to speak but closes it almost instantly. He doesn't say anything, just stares at him with wide eyes and Noah's not sure what to do next. He doesn't understand any of this. If Nicholas didn't resent them, then why the hell was he acting like he did?

"I..." Noah's stomach twists at the sight of tears welling in Nicholas' eyes and he forces himself to look away, anywhere and everywhere but his face. "How can you not fucking see, Noah?"

"See what?"

They're so close. So fucking close and Noah finally gains enough courage to look at Nicholas again, and immediately wishes he hadn't. He watches the first tear fall, stream down Nicholas' cheeks, and he feels like someone just stabbed him in the fucking chest repeatedly. Why was he crying? What was there to cry over?

"How I feel about Naomi. How I feel about you." Nicholas sounds so small, voice barely above a whisper.

"...About me?" Noah asks dumbly, but his mind is working double time already, heart thudding loudly against his chest.

There's no way Nicholas is admitting to this. Admitting to something that Noah told himself years ago would never fucking happen - could never fucking happen. That's why he shoved it so far back into his mind, his heart, because he could never allow something like that to come between him and his best friend.

"Noah, I..." The words are on the tip of his tongue and Noah knows what he's going to say. He can feel it in his fucking bones and he feels his hands shaking at his sides again, but this time with anticipation. "I..."

"Nicky." Noah all but whines out, voice soft and eyes pleading.

Nicholas' mouth shuts and Noah sees the exact moment his gaze falls to his lips before moving back up. His ears ring and his skin heats up, standing there while Nicholas reaches for him, tattooed hands cupping his face. He watches the boy lean in and barely even registers the fact that Nicholas' lips are against his before the other is pulling back, eyes wide.

"Shit, Noah - I'm sorry. Fuck. I'm so fucking sorry-"

Noah's not paying attention to his words, no, his ears are still ringing so fucking loud that Nicholas sounds muffled right now. He's too busy thinking about the way Nicholas' hands are still cradling his face and how gentle he was with him, their lips pressing together in what he thinks was the gentlest kiss of his life. Well, sort of a kiss. He didn't even kiss back, didn't think to kiss back because his brain short circuited. His lips were soft, not nearly as soft as Mimi's, but still softer than he imagined.

"- I wasn't thinking. I shouldn't have done that without asking, I'm fucking sorry-"

Noah reaches up to circle his fingers around Nicholas' wrists when he feels the other trying to slip away. He keeps his hands there, against his face, and stares at him for another beat before surging forward. Their lips crash together with such force that they both stumble and Noah's hands drop from Nicholas' wrists to rest against his hips, keeping him steady. He thinks he hears Nicholas make some kind of noise, feels the vibration against his lips, but that damn ringing in his ears won't stop.

This kiss isn't anything like the one they just shared. Far from it. It's messy, sloppy, and all teeth, but it has Noah's skin buzzing in what he can only assume is excitement and fucking relief because this is what he's always imagined it to be like. Years of pent up frustration, long years of fucking yearning has led to this and Noah can't help but whine against Nicholas' lips. It's like they fit perfectly together, like Nicholas was the missing puzzle piece in this story. It reminds him of kissing Naomi, and how much he loves it, and how perfect and right it always feels.

Naomi.

It's like his brain was on autopilot and just finally turned back out, screeching to a halt as the realization finally dawned on him.

He can already feel the panic settling into his bones, rising until it lodges in the base of his throat and he all but pushes Nicholas away from him as if he's been burned. He feels like he's going to throw up at any second and he wishes that his ears would stop fucking ringing so loud, because all he can see is Nicholas' mouth moving but no words are coming out. The other takes a step towards him, arms reaching out but Noah shakes his head quickly. He takes two large steps back.

"Noah?”

It's muffled and barely sounds like Nicholas. Noah shakes his head again and takes another step back, yelping when he comes in contact with the door. He has to get out of here.

"I'm sorry." He gets out shakily before he reaches for the door handle and throws the door open, rushing for the stairs.

FuckFuckFuck.

He needs to get out of there. He needs to leave and go somewhere so fucking far away because he cannot stay here. No, he can't. The last glimpse he had of Nicholas crosses his mind, the absolute heartbreak written all over his face, and his chest hurts. It hurts so fucking bad and he can't breathe and-

"Woah. Slow down there, man."

Jolly chuckles and rests his hands on Noah's shoulders, but the younger boy doesn't know what's funny. He looks at him, gets out that he's headed somewhere, anywhere but here, and sees the moment confusion and then concern crosses Jolly's features. He doesn't let him question it, already ripping himself from his friends grasp. He grabs his keys that are still sitting on the counter where he left them, pats his pockets to make sure he still has his phone, and bolts out the door without another thought.

...

Her apartment feels foreign to her. She's tried so hard to make it feel like home, and it did at one point, but now it just... feels like a space she lives in. Richmond feels the same. This was the place where she grew up, where she became who she is today, and yet she's never felt so disconnected from it. It isn't home. Not anymore.

Home is almost three thousand miles away.

Naomi's eyes glance over at her phone next to her on the floor and sighs when no new notifications show up. She's only been home for about an hour, texting both Noah and Nicholas the second she walked through the door. She wasn't too surprised that Nicholas didn't respond, seeing as he didn't even bother telling her goodbye this morning, but Noah's silence comes as a shock. Usually she's welcomed with a text right when she lands from the boy, asking if she's landed yet and that he misses her.

There was nothing.

She knew how angry he was when Nicholas didn't meet them at the car this morning, ignoring both their texts. She knew he tried his best to hide how he was feeling, especially when she didn't do a good job hiding how she did. She felt guilty, in a way, crying over someone else when Noah was right there. He was so understanding, though, and had been ever since she told him how she felt about the kiss and Nicholas.

Naomi knew deep down it was because he understood how she felt, but was too stubborn to figure it out for himself and admit to it.

She sighs again as she tosses another shirt from her suitcase into the dirty clothes pile she's made in the middle of her room, trying to distract herself from her thoughts. She doesn't want to do laundry. She wishes she could snap her fingers and everything would be cleaned and put neatly in its place, it'd save her a lot of time.

She really tries hard to not dwell on it, but her hand is moving for her phone before she can stop herself. She'll just text him again, make sure he's alright and didn't do something stupid like confront Nicholas. She never gets to ask, though, the incoming phone call screen popping up on her phone. Her breath hitches when she realizes it was Nicholas calling her.

She lets it ring three times before answering.

"Hello?"

"I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry for being a stubborn fucking asshole and not saying goodbye. I'm sorry for ignoring you like a child." Nicholas' voice comes out quickly, words rushing together that she barely even catches what he's saying.

"Nicky, slow down-"

"I'm sorry for running away and not being brave enough to even talk about what happened-"

"Nicholas."

"- and I'm sorry for not telling you I loved you sooner. I should've done that a long time ago, but I'm a coward." Nicholas pauses to suck in a deep breath, probably to try and center himself. "I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry, Naomi. I'd take it all back if I could."

"...What?" It's stupid to say but it's all she could manage out.

“… I love you."

Mimi is stunned into silence, mouth agape as her brain tries to process whatever the fuck Nicholas just told her. Their first conversation in almost a week and this is not what she was expecting. Well, maybe the apology, but not the confession.

I'm sorry for not telling you I loved you sooner.

It should feel good. It should feel really good to hear those words, to know that he loves her, because she loves him, but it doesn't. It feels far from it. Nicholas sounds so broken and defeated on the other end that she knows that this didn't come from a place of happy realization.

Something happened. With Noah, no doubt. Something stirs in the pit of her stomach.

"Noah talked to you."

"He did."

She stays silent, the confirmation swirling around her mind. Noah talked to him.

"He left." Nicholas' voice shakes and she can already see his face, crumbling as the tears well in his eyes. She doesn't bother stopping her own, the pit in her stomach now feeling like impending fucking doom. His sniffle on the other end breaks her heart. "He barged into my room, yelled at me. Deserved. I was being an ass, I’m sorry. And then I kissed him. He asked me to be honest and I fucking kissed him because it was easier doing that than saying it."

"Nicky..."

"He just stood there and I knew I fucked up, I knew it, but then... fuck, then he kissed me." He sniffles again, followed by a pitiful whine. "Then he left. Pulled away from me like I was some sort of fucking plague and ran off. He's been gone for like two hours. I don't..." A shaky sigh follows his words and her heart feels like it's about to fall out of her chest. "He’s gone. I don't know where he is, Mimi."

Fuck.

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