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batlingsstuff · 4 years

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|| DREAM SMP HEADCANON|| Ranboo with Dementia

✧─── ･｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

AYYY WHAT'S UP GUYS it's me :) i'm sorry this took so long to make, school is fxcking me over

okay okay now onto the headcanon

this will be pure angst, so be ready boys ;)

also, this is completely platonic.

insp: Everywhere at the End of Time - The Caretaker

TW/CW // anxiety, death, panic attacks, hallucinations, dementia

✧─── ･｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

┌────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────┐

GENDER NEUTRAL

└────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────┘

✦ - STAGE ONE

at first everything was normal, you two were best friends and did basically everything together

he ocassionally forgot little things, like where he left his pickaxe and other stuff

it was harder for him to concentrate so you always were there for him to help him with everythimg, even just little things

and he appreciates it so much

then the behaviour changes, like suddenly getting more angry and/or impatient

and being more cheerful than usual

then the anxiety, he was always scared and one time he had a really bad panic attack

you were absolutely concerned about him and decided to take care of him

you never left his side

he always talked about how scared he was

and ranted for hours

until he forgot about his problems

✦ - STAGE TWO

everything stayed like that for two years, then he started forgetting major things, like people's names

one day you two went to visit your friend, jack manifold

he couldn't remember his name or who he was

you noticed there was something wrong with him, and decided to take him to several hospitals and clinics

after several check-ups you got the results

he was diagnosed with dementia

you cried for hours while he was sitting next to you patting your back, constantly asking why you were crying

he would ask the same question several times, making you cry harder

you moved in with him to make sure he was taking his meds

"why am i taking these, (y/n)?"

'for your own sake'

one day you took him to a walk around snowchester and he looked disorientated, not knowing what was that place

✦ - STAGE THREE

everything was worse, so much worse

he lost his memory book because he misplaced it somewhere, but you don't know where

he had trouble with speaking and stumbled with his words most of the time

tubbo, his platonical husband, came to visit every now and then to check up on ranboo

but ranboo forgot who was him

"your husband? haha oh no, i don't rem...ember getting engaged, i'm sorry."

"why are you crying?"

tubbo stopped visiting after that

he often had problem differentiating colours

one day he was so depressed that he couldn't get out of the bed for two days

after that, he seemed to have trouble recognizing you

'ranboo, it's me, your best friend (y/n)! don't you remember me ranboo? please remember.'

"i... don't know who you are... i'm sorry. i don't even r...ecall having a b-best friend."

you couldn't stop crying

your best friend was slowly losing his memories, and you couldn't do anything about it

i guess it's over, isn't it?

✦ - STAGE FOUR

his memory problems got so much worse, he forgot that water could actually damage him

he was curious about the rain, so he got out one day when it was raining and put out his hand to reach the droplets

he hissed in pain when the water damaged his skin and stormed back inside

hopefully you treated his wounds quickly and told him that it was better if he stayed in bed for now

while he was in bed and you were trying to get some rest besides him, he allucinated about a whole ass wave drowning him and he started to scream, like if he was in pain

you woke up due to the screaming and tried to calm him down, hugging him tightly and shushing him

he calmed down after a few minutes, sobbing loudly and returning the hug

he was scared, he didn't want to die

he couldn't talk at this point, every noise that came out of his mouth was incomprehensible, he was unable to communicate with others normally

you couldn't understand him, he couldn't understand you

your friendship was falling apart with the time

but afterall, you were there for him.

and that warmed his heart, even if he wasn't aware of that.

✦ - STAGE FIVE

he stayed up late multiple times, just watching you sleep or looking at the window, not able to think about anything

he felt like he was disconnecting from reality, like if his soul was slowly leaving his body

everything was foggy in his mind as he started to forget who was he, what was his name and occupation, who were his friends

who were his friends? is a question that he often asked himself

he looked at you one more time while he repeated that question simultaneously

"they're my friend."

he repeated that sentence several times, like if he was reassuring himself so he wouldn't forget that you were his friend.

he wrapped his arms around you while you slept, pulling you in a gentle hug

"thank you."

why was he thanking you? he felt like you were doing something important for him

but he couldn't remember what it was.

and that frustrated him, so he started sobbing uncontrollably

but he managed to calm himself down thanks to the relaxing sound of your heartbeat

he felt like he was dying slowly, but he didn't care about that

he had a friend who cared about him, and that's what matters to him.

✦ - STAGE SIX

ranboo was worse than ever, he forgot how to eat food properly and the basic movements of the mouth to do so

so you had to help him by gently moving his jaw up and down so he could munch the food

deep down his heart, he was thankful.

he didn't understand what was happening to him or who you were, but he knew that you were his friend.

he would randomly start crying, but it wasn't out of sadness

they were tears of joy

he was thankful that you were his friend

as no one else came to visit anymore

so he spend up his last years snuggling with you, always trying to remind himself that you were special.

and he loved you dearly, platonically speaking

✦ - STAGE SEVEN

ranboo couldn't even get out of bed as he forgot how to use his legs properly, not being able to walk

so you brought him food to his bedroom and started talking with him everyday and you didn't care anymore if he didn't answer you

you knew he wasn't able to speak anymore

you even stopped caring about your life, like work and friends

you wanted to spend every single minute with ranboo so he wouldn't be alone in his last days of life.

the days passed by slowly and one day everything ended abruptly.

ranboo forgot how to breathe, his body reacted roughly to the lack of oxygen and started moving his hand uncontrollably

you were beside him scared and paralyzed, watching how the life drained slowly from him

after what seemed to be like a few minutes, he stopped moving

he gasped loudly as he remembered everything; his name, his friends, his origins, his house, his cats, his crown, his husband, l'manberg, his memory book, you.

after that, he whispered his last words:

"(y/n)?"

and boom, he was gone.

gone from this world, forever.

you shaked him in horror, screaming his name multiple times as you cried.

your best friend was gone, and you couldn't do anything about it

so i guess this is it, huh?

✦ - AFTER RANBOO // BONUS

you hosted his funeral and everyone except dream was invited

everyone cried for him, they felt guilty as no one except you were there for him when he most needed it

tubbo was heartbroken, he was in denial and left the funeral early, probably gone to spend time with michael, his son

after that, everyone went home and you noticed that a strange book was lying in your house's entrance

you went to inspect what was it and noticed the book was dusty so you cleaned it to read what the title was

the title was 'DO NOT READ'', you recognized that book as ranboo's memory book

you gasped and stormed inside the house to read it

you sat on a couch and flipped the first page, reading carefully every single page and making sure you didn't skip anything

while you were reading, a small note was found in one of the pages and you started reading it, noticing that his handwriting was more messy than usual

it read: "Hello, if you're reading this then this is embarrassing. I wanted to write out my feelings in this small note because I was scared to talk out this with (Y/N). The thing is: I'm scared. I've been losing my memories and it's scary, I'm scared of forgetting who am I or who are my friends, I don't want to lose them. I know I promised Tubbo and Michael that I would protect them, but I'm not sure if I can keep that promise anymore. Tubbo if you're reading this, I'm sorry, for everything. Things seem to go downhill everytime I forget about things, even if they're just small things like forgetting where is my crown, and I'm scared that I will eventually forget who are my friends. I don't want to lose (Y/N), they're my best friend and I'm not ready to lose them yet. I know it sounds stupid but I just wanted to write about how I feel, goodbye forever Memory Book."

oh no, you were sobbing again.

"why didn't you tell me sooner, ranboo?"

"why?"

✧─── ･｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

IT'S FINISHED, FINALLYYyyY Yy YY yes i love angst i love making people suffer

ANYWAYS thank you if you readed all of that shit, also big thanks to my friend moony for helping me with the grammar since i don't do english

moony if you're seeing this i love you /p

ANYWAYS THANK YOU ALL FOR THE SUPPORT!! I REALLY APPRECIATE IT!!!!!!

#ranboo x reader #ranboo #dream smp #headcanons #everywhere at the end of time #dementia #mcyt #angst #angst fic #eateot #NOO SHIT I FORGOT MY HOMEWORK

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onawhimsicot · 3 years

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I'm getting to the end of League of Dragons (seems like it's building up to the final confrontation with Napoleon!) and I'm sorta in denial about being done with the whole series, so I just keep putting off finishing it D:

long list of spoiler reactions below:

- I really loved the dueling stuff in the beginning, needlessly dramatic, love Laurence getting into ridiculous situations bc of his honor that make Temeraire lose his shit haha. Also Hammond unexpectedly being kinda a badass??

- I think it's really interesting seeing the universal culture/instincts dragons share! It was clear that all dragons cared about eggs to some degree, but I think it's really interesting that even though they don't rear their own young, egg-stealing/endangerment is reviled. But also, that protectiveness/parental instincts only extend to the egg; literally the second they hatch, the dragons are like welp, you can do whatever you want, our job is done. The change is immediate and the dragonet completely disappears from their list of priorities. Even though I knew Iskierka and Temeraire weren't going to be doting parents or anything, it was still really cool to see the drastic way their attitude changed. Like yeah!! they don't rear their young! they're done!

-I'm fascinated by Ning's combination of divine wind and fire! I'm bad at understanding and visualizing action scenes so I don't think I fully get what happened quite yet--- Was she making that shrieking noise as a version of the divine wind that's separate from the fire or was she building up heat like a tea kettle so that she could have that high heat blast of fire? I'm thinking it's more of the former, but I hope we get to see more of her skills bc it's incredibly neat. But who knows what the little schemer is up to lol It sounds as if she might just be companionless in the end? Maybe she'll "technically" be someone's companion but still do her own thing with politics. I really do love the dragonrider bond though so I would love to see how she would change if she bonded with someone

- PERSCITIA MY BELOVED, i care her so much, and I love that she and Temeraire are legit friends

- Temeraire trying so hard to keep a secret from Laurence because he realizes for the first time in a long time, Laurence is smiling and laughing 🥺 and then the cut to Laurence's POV that immediately reveals Laurence is hiding something from Temeraire too LMAO incredibly funny. Also love that we're seeing the ways Temeraire has matured-- he's still the same silly dragon but him trying to maintain Laurence's happiness was so sweet.

- I think my favorite scene so far has to be the little awards ceremony. Once again, seeing those cultural(?) things with the dragons haha. I love that all the captains are like okay...this is boring... and the dragons are like oh my GOD!!! BE RESPECTFUL!!!!! like the tables are flipped for once and the dragons are just embarrassed that they have to keep the captains under control. Fidelitas being upset that he's not getting an award but immediately putting that aside because this is a SOCIAL event, he has to be RESPECTFUL about the proceedings-- oh no, his captain is so embarassing!!!!! LMAO such a fun scene. I love the way we see dragons have their own society going on in the backgrounds and its more complex than just "me and my captain"

-Just know I am at all times going feral over any crumbs of Tharkay content, I like him so much

- and Emily Roland too, i'm always so happy whenever she's around. She was gone for a couple of chapters and i mISSED HER SO MUCH, i love the way she GETS Laurence at this point and is just like oh my god ughhh of COURSE he went dueling. I am so fond of her and I love that we got to keep seeing her grow throughout the entire series.

-oh and them finally seeing Temeraire's namesake? I felt that in my heart 🥺

#i never wrote down this much of my thoughts as i read through the other books but im thinking ill do that when i reread the series #which i really want to do since i had such a pretty big gap between LoD and the rest of the series #i want to own all the books SO badly so i can just keep flipping to my favorite scenes #temeraire #liveblogging about them dragon books #league of dragons #reading log

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animesmutfest · 4 years

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Hawks x Reader

You look at the clock in disbelief as the hand strikes twelve. You sat on the couch drinking wine with tears running down your face. Your husband is no where to be found. Again. Its your fourth anniversary and he has not been home at all today. Suddenly you hear the door unlock but you don't even look your just take another sip of your wine. You could tell he was at least tipsy as he stumbles in the house. He looks over to you and see your cup and tear streaked face. Walking closer he realized you’re dressed up and a card lays on the cushion next to her reading happy anniversary. Before he could even speak you start. "Two years. You haven't been here for an event for two years. You've missed even our own daughters birthdays." You say seething with anger. "Y/n listen" he starts. "You know what Kiego?! You can go fuck yourself! Get the hell out!" You scream at hawks throwing his jacket and shoes at him. "Come on Y/N do you really want to end things like this? Please don't give up on me!" He says pleading. "You have missed every single family event the past two years. If you want to drown in a bottle or use work as an excuse, me and our daughter deserve better than that!" You scream while crying. hawks now crying as well sinks to the floor realizing that you wear right. Every single family event for the past two years he has either been working or drinking. "Ill stop drinking babe! I wont ever drink again if that's what you want!" He cries. "I don't want you to do anything but be the man i thought i married. But i cant even trust you to do that considering you're never here" you shout. "Okay y/n ill leave. But i promise you I'm going to do better from here on!" He says walking out the door.you close it behind him and sink to the bottom balling your eyes out. His heart breaks as he hears your cries, the cries that he caused.

He gets in his car and drives to a hotel to give you space. At the hotel he cry's into his bottle of jack thinking about the facts and the facts are her has not been there for his own family. His two year older daughter ember is 3 and he hasn't been to her 2nd or 3rd birthday parties. He's always just told y/n something came up. "I really am a pathetic excuse of a man. My wife is perfect and my daughter is my pride and joy but I still do shit like this. I'm never fucking around when I need to be" he says crying harder. Back at the house y/n pretty much cried herself to sleep. The next day you send him a text telling him to stay away until he can prove to his family that we come first. He gave a simple okay response. You spend the day with ember playing with her and cooking dinner for her. Once you put ember to bed you head to your own room. You lay in bed with no one beside you and the loneliness makes you cry again. "I just wish he was here" you say as you drift asleep.

Six months later:

A few months ago I was strong enough to invite him over for dinner. Ember was with her grand parents as to not be involved in our issues. We made a deal that he would stay at a hotel and every weekend he can come over for dinner. So far he has made more time for our family than he ever has. He even has a glow on him now that he isn't drinking. That's right, he stopped drinking after that night. And tonight after six long and lonely months you really wanted him back home. He invited you out on a date at a nice restaurant and your mom offered to keep ember. You hear the doorbell ring as you make your way down stairs. He's wears a nice pair of pants and a button down. And this is what you have on with your hair in a pony tail.

"Wow... you look stunning babe" he says blushing. "Thank you kiego" you say blushing as well. You both leave and head to the restaurant. Once you are there the staff seat you and bring a bottle of wine. "Oh sir I don't drink thank you though" he says pushing the bottle away. "You sure you don't want any?" You asks. "No love I'm good you enjoy yourself" he says smiling. Impressed you start talking to him about how he's been and how work is. Come to think of it you haven't seen him even look at a drop of alcohol since that night. After a while he grabs your hand and looks into your eyes. "I miss you y/n and I miss ember" he says kissing your hand gently. "We miss you too kiego" you say softly. "I've been thinking a lot and would it be too forward of me to ask if I could stay over tonight?" He asks putting his head down a bit waiting to be rejected again. You have seen his efforts and he really has gotten better. Plus I really do miss him. You think to yourself blushing a bit. "You can come home kiego" you say shyly. His face lit up and he rested his forehead on your hand in relief. "Thank god..." he says as a single tear falls down his face. "C-can I kiss you y/n?" He asks. You grab his blazer and your lips crash onto each other's. You pull away blushing and ask him to take them home. He happily complies and after paying they head home.

As soon as they open the door you pull him into another kiss but this one more aggressive. His wings puff up a bit as things heat up. He takes his blazer off and pulls you close to him deepening your kiss. He pushed your back against the wall sliding his hand up your dress and grabbing your ass. You moans into the kiss at his touch and his mouth slowly moved down to your jawline then neck. Your moans are light as your hands rubs on his arms. "Can I please take you baby? It's been so long and I think I might lose my mind." He asks desperately. "Please kiego" you moan. He picks your up with your legs around his waist and walks you upstairs to the bedroom. He kicks open the door and places you on the bed with him between your legs. His mouth attacking your neck desperately searching for your voice. As your hands feel all over one another his head trails down to your panties and he licks your clit through the fabric making your body tingle a bit. "Don't tease me baby... please, I really need it" you say squirming. He smirks "As you wish baby" and slides your panties to the side and he begins to devour you. "Fuck~!” You moan as you tug on his hair a bit from the pleasure but also trying to show resistance. You use your hand to muffle your moans but this made him stop completely. He looks up at you with feral eyes. "I haven't touched you in over 6 months baby... move that fucking hand and let me hear you." He growls at you. His eyes even looked different as if he was truly an animal And you were his prey. You do as your told and slowly move your hand. He wastes no time going back to his meal. His hands now gripping your thighs to keep you in place as he slides his tongue inside you. "K-kiego ngh yes baby~" you moan loudly as you squirm under him.

He repeatedly moves his muscle in that motion and slurping you up as he pulled out. "I fucking missed you dove... your taste is even more delicious" he groans as he gently sucks on your clit. Your hips buck into his mouth as pleasure consumes you making you feel like melting into him. Minutes went by like this as you’re edged closer and closer. His mouth creating lewd noises as you gush over and over again. But soon to feel a tremendous pressure in the pit of your soul. Your moans slowly becoming whimpers. "I can feel it baby... cum for me dove" he groans as he laps at your throbbing pussy. Your breathing becoming quite heavy as he worked for your juices. "I-I I'm cumming ki- fuuuck" you moan wildly as he laps up your cum faster than it can come out of you. He suddenly takes one of his feathers making it sharp and cuts off both of your clothes before he lines himself up with your pussy. He shoves himself completely inside you unexpectedly causing you to cum again. Your mind melting as you clentch hard around him. He looks at you and leans down to your face. "Did my baby just cum from me putting it in?" He smirks. You nod shaking as your hands wrap around his neck. Without another word you kiss him deeply as he starts thrusting into your tight pussy. "I-I'm so sorry baby I can't control myself" he growls as he then pulls out of you and aggressively flips you on all fours and shoving himself back into you. You cry out in pleasure as he pounds into you at inhumane speeds. His hand digging into your hip and the other gripping your arm behind your back. You feel another climax close as your skin collides over and over again.

Feeling you grip him tighter he slows down a bit but slams into you as hard as he can again and again. "Yes! Yes! Yes baby aaahhh Break me!!!!" You cry out and after a few thrusts like that you begin to squirt all over the bed. He stops amazed at what just happened. "Damn baby... I didn't know you could do that" he says blushing. You couldn't speak just moan and pant. "Let's try that again shall we?" Flipping you on you back and lifting your hips to meet his while you upper body still on the bed. "This time I wanna see it" he says licking his lips. He slides back in and goes at it like he never left. He loved the way you looked right now. Feral and completely destroyed because of him. He drools at the sight of your wet pussy being filled by him, by the way your breasts bounced harshly because of his thrusting. Your completely a mess under him barely being about to say anything besides incoherent words and whimpers. Soon you feel that strange sensation again as you neared another orgasm. "Ki! Aahh daddy~" you cry out as you grip his thighs. "Do it baby!" He moans and with that you being to squirt all over his lower stomach, cock and legs. This time much more intense as your mind went hazy for a few moments. He doesn't stop though and thrusts into a few more times before slowing down and running his hand on your stomach. "I think it's time we gave ember a sibling~" he moans. Your eyes weakly looked at his and all you could do was smile. He thrusts into you one final time as his shoots his cum deep in your womb. "God b-baby you feels so good" he moans as his cock twitches inside your throbbing pussy. You both catch your breath before cleaning up the bed and yourselves before falling asleep.

The next morning the sun beams through the room as you wake up. Kiego sleeping peacefully next to you. You kept thinking about last night blushing from what he said about giving ember a sibling. "Well if that's true then maybe I should help him out achieving that goal" you think to yourself smirking. You knew he was a heavy sleeper so you crawl between his legs and slipped his boxers off. You grab his already hard cock and slowly pump him causing his muscles to jump a bit. After a few pumps you slowly lick around the tip and suck on it softly. He moans in his sleep and his breathing pattern become irregular. You then smirk and shove him completely in your throat quickly and wastes not a moment deep throating him. He wakes up moaning loudly pulling back the blanket staring at you with a red face. "B-baby what ahh~" his moans not allowing him to speak properly. You ignore him and climb on top slowly sinking yourself down on him. His head falling back into the bed from the pleasure. You roll your hips into his instead of bouncing making both of you moan aloud. You pull him back up and wrap your hands around his neck while he’s gripping your waist. His mouth sucking on your neck harshly leaving marks everywhere his tongue danced. "I'm so close baby~" he moans into you and he thrusts into you. You throw your body back and grip his thighs as you bounce on his cock forcing your skin to slap against his own.

His grip tightens as he nears his climax. Your pace quickens as you chase your own climax as well. "Feels s-so good daddy~" you moan into the air as you clench around him. "Shit dove I-I'm gunna cum" he moans as sweat beads on his forehead. "Fill me up d-daddy. I want it deep inside~" you moan as you cum hard on his cock. He fucks you back harder and soon after he feels himself about to cum. "Fuck yes baby! Mmmmph shiiit~" he growls as his cum fills you deep. You lean forward keeping him inside you and kiss him passionately. He grabs the back of your head deepening the kiss slipping his tongue in. He pulls back and looks into your wild eyes panting. "What's gotten into you?" He says. "You said you wanted to give ember a sibling so I thought I'd help you out" you say smirking. He laughs a bit before kissing you again. "Then let's spend the day making sure we achieve that goal. What do you say love?" He says as he gets hard again still inside you making you moan. "Yes daddy" you say.

#mha lemon #hawks x reader #mha smut #writing #fanfic #wing hero hawks #hawks smut #hawks #bnha #bnha x reader #kiego x reader #kiego takami

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xxisxxisxxis · 4 years

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Gateway Drug | Part Ninety-One [PT. 2]

Words: 2.5K

Warning(s): explicit language, mentions of drug abuse, mentions of domestic abuse

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"Your little one is here as of right now." Dr. Telille says, pointing to a very little area to the far side of my womb and I smile before she switches the focus slightly and then looks at the screen with a slightly odd look before flipping through my chart. "At your previous Obstetrician, did they mention any abnormalities?" She asks me.

"No." I shake my head.

"You said in your history you've had recurrent miscarriages?" She asks next.

"Yes."

"Okay, Mrs. Sixx, don't be alarmed by this because there is a solution but this," she turns the screen to me again, pointing at a shadow in the picture that looks like it's creating bunny ears or something. "Is a layer of tissue that's not supposed to be there. It halts fetal growth, and ultimately causes miscarriages, often times even before a fetus is interacting with the tissue itself, physically." She informs me and I feel like my chest is throbbing from how hard my heart is beating. "The good news is that we can fix this, I've had to do a few surgeries like this before--we can go in and cut that tissue out without disturbing your baby, but we will need to have it done within the next week--two weeks at the most." She explains and I raise my brows.

"What's my chance of carrying out my pregnancy to term without the surgery?" I ask, trying to stay calm.

"With a successful surgery, there is a 80% chance of you carrying it to term, and a higher chance at not facing as many pregnancy difficulties in the future like you've had previously. Without the surgery, with your history, it's very, very probable that you won't get to four months without miscarrying--if that far." She adds.

"What's the risk of this surgery causing complications?" I ask next.

"30%." She replies and I breathe out. "You don't have to make a decision today, you can go home and think about it and talk about it with the father but we need to get it scheduled in the next few days."

"Um, o-okay…" I rub my lips together.

"And if you are interested in the surgery, we can go ahead and send it in and see if insurance will cover it." She assures me.

"I don't have maternity insurance right now." I tell her and she looks at me uneasily.

"No worries, we can figure the costs out after you decide if you want it or not." She tells me, calmly, and I just nod.

I numbed myself. I would've been freaking out, having a meltdown, begging God to spare my damn baby for once...but as soon as she started in on what was wrong with me, the negative outcomes...I flicked the switch in my brain and just let myself feel absolutely nothing as best as I could. My nervousness was relief compared to blatant breakdown mode that I knew would hit inevitably.

And how the hell did I tell Duff and Nikki that I was going to need surgery that could potentially terminate my pregnancy--or suffer what I'd suffered before and still lose a baby? Oh, right. I didn't. At least, not as soon as I probably should have.

When I get to my new little house I'm renting with my savings, Duff's sitting on the little porch, drinking a beer.

"How'd it go?" He asks me, standing up as I unlock the door.

He couldn't go with me this time because he had to go look at a couple houses with Mandy, which I understand because they had already canceled once with a real-estate agent and would get charged extra if they missed another appointment.

"Good." I lie, clearing my throat.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Whisky's barking at us until he realizes it's me, and then he won't get out from under my feet until I pat him on the head.

"I need to finish unpacking." I say before Duff can ask anymore questions.

"Well, it's your lucky day because I know how to unpack." He states, grinning.

I go change into pajamas and when I get back, he's pulling pictures from one of the boxes, neatly placing them on the coffee table in the living room and I pick them up and start figuring out where to put them.

"So, my family really wants me to bring you up." He says, optimistically. "I was thinking leave Sunday and come back next Saturday."

"...Duff, I can't just up and leave right now. I have to finish unpacking, and I'm gonna be meeting with Nikki once a week and then him and the guys once a week so that's two different…" I trail off as he cuts open another one of my packed boxes with his pocket knife, a look of disappointment on his face. "...It's not that I don't want to, you know. I just have a lot going on right now."

"We'd just be gone for a week." He says, looking at me. "It's the only time off I have for a while since we're doing a few shows in New York and Europe." He adds. "And I really want my family to know you, kinda, before you have the baby."

"I don't know." I hesitantly tell him and he licks his lips. "I don't know, Duff, okay? I just...ughhh." I groan, raking my hands through my hair.

"If you don't want to meet my family then don't worry about it, Vivian." He says it a little passive aggressively and I raise my brows.

"'Vivian'? Since when the hell am I 'Vivian'?" I ask, mimicking his tone.

"That's your name isn't it?" He asks next and I cross my arms.

"You usually call me 'Viv', or...something…"

"Well, I'm not calling you, 'babe,' or, 'baby,' since we aren't dating anymore so…"

"You're being a dick."

"I'm not being a dick. I'm just family oriented and I want my family to know you and our kid and you're making up excuses to not go and meet them."

"Excuse me for not wanting to be judged." I snap back.

"They're not fucking judgemental."

"Oh, so you're cussing at me now, too, huh?"

"Quit trying to start an argument." He tells me.

"I'm not starting an argument, I'm making a valid point."

"You're making an assumption." He corrects me. "My family isn't judgemental. They're really not. I don't even think they're worried with the fact that you were married when we got together because they haven't said a word about it. They just want to meet you."

"Matt didn't seem so cool about it." I mumble.

"Matt was trying to keep both of us out of trouble." He explains. "He wasn't judging you. He just doesn't like drama and if we would've gotten caught he knew it'd just be a bunch of bullshit we'd have to get thrown at us."

I just stare at him.

"And I'm sorry for cussing at you, but I'm trying to be positive about all of this and I really don't want you to start bringing in your negativity." He exhales.

"My negativity?" I raise my brows, laughing humorlessly.

"Please, just come to Seattle with me next Sunday. I promise it'll be fun and my family's fun, they don't mean any harm by wanting you to come up and visit--they're already talking about planning a trip when it's born to be here for you and me both for a few days." He adds.

I think about it, seeing his eyes glint a little as he slowly smiles at me like a hopeful puppy.

"Okay." I relent and he puts his hands above his head, folding them together, letting out a loud, "Hallelujah!" and I roll my eyes, trying to hold back a chuckle.

The truth is, I don't want to leave Nikki stewing that long after revealing to him my miscarriages. He never came back when he left the therapy session yesterday, and I was supposed to go back today but decided I needed another day to just think about everything, but because of Amber's schedule, we won't be able to get back in the same room together--aside from me just visiting him--until next Wednesday...but with Duff wanting to leave Sunday and come back that Saturday, I won't be able to meet then, either. A part of me isn't even sorry that I won't make it since the morale of Nikki's story is that he married a maestro of manipulation that can play victim like no other but is really an evil bitch who loves to make people suffer.

I gathered that after reading:

"I married a fucking demon."

"Vivian climbed from hell just to neuter me."

"My wife's a fucking lunatic."

"I sometimes think Vivian's waiting for me to die so she can get the money."

"I hate her."

"I don't know what's killing me faster: my looney wife, or smack. Doesn't matter--they're both my drug of choice."

"If she didn't know how to fuck I would've already left her."

"She flushed every bit of what Jason dropped off last night. Cost me a couple grand. I'm so pissed, if I knew she wouldn't beat the shit out of me and go batshit-ballistic, I'd lay her out on the fucking floor. I'm sure it'd be like foreplay in her sick mind, anyway."

"I swear she cums every time she belittles me."

And, my personal favorite:

"Just woke up from a fucking nightmare. I was fucking around with Vivian and Vanity and once they got their satisfaction they started eating me alive while talking about their love for God. Even with them gnawing on me alive with their shark-like teeth and their completely black eyes, stripping flesh from my bone and going at it like a fucking pork chop, I was turned on. But as soon as they started about God, how good and wonderful he was, that's when I started panicking a little that I OD'd without realizing it and was in hell or some fucking incarnation of it. I see now that's how they both got me, being hot and knowing exactly what to do to get me going. And now they're both sucking the life out of me, eating me alive, while praying to their God and acting like they're blameless in my destruction. CHICKS = TROUBLE."

At least we both agree that we married demons.

It was strange for me to realize how he saw me--well, how Sikki saw me. Once I was able to differentiate between the two of them, it hurt less reading what he'd write about me. It was just confusing.

One page would be an entire rant (with unflattering, random song lyrics to match) about something I did that pissed him off--sometimes things I wouldn't even realize I did to make him upset and then the next page would be decently positive things about me that he'd profess after waking up sort of sober…

I knew he felt guilty about how he treated me, most of the entries from the end of '83 to '87 had "I'm an asshole" or "I really fucked up" or some version of it in them but the deeper into '87 he got, the less and less apologetic he got. Both in real time and his dairies.

Despite the black and white of his diaries, one thing still lingered in the grey area…

I stare at the little TV on my dresser, bowl of captain crunch in hand as I stuff my face while flipping channels, Whisky gnawing on his chew toy as a flickering, fuzzy and static blaring familiar face flashes across the screen as I turn to the next channel. My heart stops for a moment, my finger immediately going back, the screen and audio clearing as I see her.

Clear eyed and competent. A far removal from what I last saw of her with her gnashing teeth and tortured eyes, spewing at Nikki and I both before he and her got into a fight that left her dragged down the stairs of our old house...guilt tugs at me, remembering the look on her face, the pain, the hurt...perhaps she felt as bad as I did about the situation.

He was the one telling her he was going to leave me and marry her, after all. My feury swallowed him before it ever thought about swallowing her.

"...I'm currently looking at other scripts for other films." She replies very calm and composed to whatever question her interviewer was asking...I'm assuming this is part of her press run for her new movie coming out.

"If you could write a ticket for yourself, Vanity, what would it be?" The woman asks next and she furrows her brows, slightly.

"Write a ticket? To go somewhere?"

"No, write a ticket for the rest of your life, and your career. Just everything about your life." She explains.

"Ohhh," She thinks a moment before shaking her head slightly. "I wouldn't want to do that, actually, because, um, everytime I turn around something new's happening. I'm a very spontaneous person. I just like to get up and go, and I've been doing that since I was fifteen...so, um, I couldn't say I'd like to write that ticket." She chuckles a little, but not the crack-cackle I was used to seeing in her past interviews.

She's actually sober here.

"I just wanna go wherever life takes me." She continues.

"What you're saying then, is, you couldn't write a ticket because what you would write wouldn't be as good as what could happen?"

"No, I don't--"

"--No?"

"No, I don't think that, I'm not saying that at all. I feel that I have certain goals in my life. Very big, big, dreams that I set for myself. But I wouldn't wanna, um, question God's way about where he's going with me." She states. "That's just...not me."

"If you could go back and change anything--"

"--Nothing." Vanity says, biting her lip nervously, shaking her head.

"Any of the decisions?"

"Nothing."

"Wouldn't change a thing?"

"Nothing." She buckles down on it and I feel my eyes gloss over. "Wouldn't change a thing…" she trails off, thinking for a second. "...Can't say that I would." She adds, softly. "Because each time that I've done something, whether it be a mistake in my life, it's always...what you might call a mistake in my life is never a mistake to me. It was a definite meant to be and it was a definite learning process. So all the pain and all the glory...I wouldn't change a thing."

She's so unapologetically sincere.

I cut the TV off as they start closing out the interview, and toss the remote across the room, losing my appetite and putting my bowl on my nightstand before I allow myself to replay what she just said.

And I cry, not because she was in a relationship with him, not because she tried to steal him from me...I cry because I regret everything. I regret marrying Nikki. I regret meeting Duff. I regret getting pegnant.

I'm not angry at her.

I envy her.

#nikki sixx #nikki sixx x oc #nikki sixx fanfiction #gateway drug

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sendrickbecs · 4 years

Text

A Token Of Your Love (1/1)

"Come on dude. Help me out here, just stay in the grabby thing and don't fall – fuck."

Beca's hands slam down in frustration, coming in contact with the glass window on the arcade game she's attempting to play and then win – but it's kind of kicking her ass.

The concoction of various smells – burgers, popcorn and candy floss – mixes with the strong stench of alcohol – beer mostly. It's actually kind of nice, despite the fact that it's making Beca's stomach rumble and her craving for a drink intensify.

"One more. This is it. I can do this." She mumbles to herself, but she doesn't quite believe her self-reassuring words. "If I don't win this then Chloe will never love me."

She almost snorts at herself, she's being so ridiculous right now. Not only is she talking to herself in a very public place, but she's also talking to herself about Chloe – the girl she's been in love with for the last three years – and trying to convince herself that winning the toy and gifting it to Chloe will make her fall in love with her, just like that.

The chance that it could make Chloe fall in love with her is what gives Beca the motivation to keep trying, shoving token after token into the machine then failing again and again.

But if she wins the fucking stuffed animal then Chloe – the girl of her fucking dreams – might finally return those goddamn feelings that have her feeling completely smitten. It's Chloe's fault that Beca is even playing this stupid game anyway, and she kind of hates that she's doing something so cliché in attempt to 'get the girl' but it is what it is and Beca is not one to give up on something that she really wants.

She digs into her pocket and retrieves a token – every game in the arcade requires a token to play and she's used every single one of hers on this claw machine.

Once she's slotted the token in, she presses the button to start up the game and begins directing the claw towards the middle of the machine.

It's just her luck – or lack of skill – that the claw once again drops the prize back onto the pile of stuffed animals.

Her head rests against the glass whilst she dials down her anger and reminds herself that it is only an arcade game and it is not the end of the world if she doesn't win. Beca doesn't see it that way, however, because she needs to win this, she needs Chloe to love her, because she doesn't know how much longer she can be 'just friends' for and it physically hurts knowing that Chloe might reject her and then she'll lose her best friend.

So, to Beca, this arcade game kind of is a life and death situation. She desperately needs to win.

Another token is pushed into the slot. At this point Beca has lost count how many she's put into the machine, but she knows she's coming close to using them all up.

"Hi, Shawshank."

Fat Amy's voice startles her so much that she jumps, her hand jolting, nudging the button in the process. The claw reaches down, retrieving a small lion, carrying it a couple of inches before releasing it again.

The lion stuffed animal is not her intended prize so Beca lets out a sigh of relief when the claw drops it only seconds after picking it up. However, she supposes that if she had won the lion then that would be okay too. Afterall, Chloe's ginger hair looks like a lion's mane so she wouldn't throw it back in her face – Chloe would never do that anyway, but Beca just wants Chloe to like it.

She's been at this same arcade machine for a while now with the pure determination that she isn't giving up until she wins the stuffed version of Chloe's favourite animal. Beca cannot wait to see the expression on her best friend's face when she gives it to her.

"Hey, Ames," Beca nods, glancing at Fat Amy's reflection in the glass. She has a burger in one hand and a milkshake in the other.

Beca takes a moment to glance behind the blonde, attempting to locate the other Bellas, but mostly looking for the redhead. When she still hasn't seen them, she tears her eyes away and her gaze wanders back to the stuffed animal in the claw machine.

Fat Amy takes another step forward, tapping the glass lightly with her milkshake cup as both of her hands are occupied. "How much money have you put into this thing?" She asks as she lifts the straw of the milkshake to her lips and slurps loudly.

"Doesn't matter." Beca responds quickly, shrugging before reaching into the back pockets of her jeans, digging until she pulls out two more tokens – her last two tokens.

Amy leans her entire weight on the arcade machine, standing to Beca's right. The smaller girl is watching her out of the corner of her eye, she's munching on her burger yet is still focusing on the way Beca is staring intensely at the bear.

"You've been here for the last twenty minutes. Why are you so determined?"

Beca's facial expression is unclear which only heightens Fat Amy's curiosity. She clearly knows something is up with her friend but is yet to figure out what.

The question goes ignored, instead Beca asks a question of her own. "Where are the others?" Once again she is glancing around frantically. She doesn't want to be caught by the other Bellas – especially Chloe – playing (and failing to win) a claw machine full of stuffed animals. They are bound to tease her for it.

"They're getting Candy floss." Fat Amy responds, her tone a little muffled as she's just stuffed the last of her burger into her mouth.

"Okay, good." Beca nods, her eyes scanning her surroundings until her gaze lands on the candy floss stand. Instantly she's met with the sight of the beautiful redhead, she's grinning at the rest of the Bellas, obviously in conversation.

Cynthia Rose, Jessica, Ashley and Emily are holding sticks of candyfloss and the others are waiting in the line. However, Lily is holding three of the candy floss sticks (without the candy floss) in between her fingers on both hands. Beca shakes her head, not even questioning why Lily is pretending to be wolverine.

Her eyes land on Chloe once more, embracing her beauty at the same time as admiring her smile. Her happiness is just so contagious that Beca's own lips tug upwards, curling the corners of her lips until she's presenting a smile.

Every time she looks at Chloe, a damn smile breaks out onto her face.

"Why?" Fat Amy's voice breaks her out of her trance. Beca flips her head back around and locks eyes with the blonde. "What are you doing?" Amy is intrigued now, knowing the small brunette is up to something, she can see it glistening in her eyes.

Beca lifts her hand to the glass and points to the red panda. "I'm winning Chlo that red panda, I don't care how long it takes."

Amy's expression rises from confusion and a huge grin plays at her lips. "You're winning this for Chloe? Of course you are. That explains why you haven't given up yet."

The brunette scoffs in attempt to reign in her soft side, "Shut up. Red pandas are Chloe's favourite."

"When are you finally going to ask her out? You're head over heels for the girl."

Once again, Beca ignores Amy, simply focusing on the claw as she reaches into her pocket for another token. "I have to win this for her."

Just like every single attempt so far, the token slots into the machine and goes to waste as the claw releases the red panda.

"Motherfucker." Beca kicks her foot into the bottom of the machine, causing a few people to turn in her direction. They all throw her a strange, very judgemental look before continuing with their own games.

"Jesus. Chill out Beca." Amy says, reaching forwards and placing her hand on the smaller girl's shoulder in attempt to comfort her. She sighs, then adds, "You know you could just buy one from the booth over there." Amy throws her thumb back, gesturing to the small booth across from them.

"Those ones are smaller."

Fat Amy huffs at Beca's reply, "Chloe will love it either way if you give it to her. She loves anything you give her. You don't need to win her over with a stuffed panda because she already loves you."

Beca's head snaps up at Amy's words. "Chloe loves me?" She repeats.

"Chloe loves you." The blonde chuckles, as she nods. "You're both completely oblivious and it's annoying, but she loves you as much as you love her."

It takes Beca a few seconds to take in the words. Chloe loves...her. Why her? Chloe could do so much better than her because she's so beautiful, smart and happy, she's so perfect. Does Chloe actually love her? Shit, if Chloe loves her too then she's the luckiest person on the planet. No, the motherfucking universe.

Beca physically shakes her head to rid of the rambling thoughts. "Shit. Really?" She can't quite believe what she's hearing. The love of her life loves her back?

"Yes." Fat Amy nods, "So, let's win this thing and go get your girl."

Beca's sudden wave of confidence makes her a little cocky, causing another token to go to waste. Just because Chloe loves her back does not mean she can suddenly ace an arcade machine. The button is pressed to early and the claw reaches down, picking up nothing but a tigers leg, releasing it's grasp before it can properly grab it.

"Fuck. That was my last token." Beca grumbles, her face dropping when she realises that she's completely wasted the last half hour and spent way too much money to come out with nothing.

Fat Amy shakes her head vigorously, "No, we aren't giving up yet Shawshank." She places the empty milkshake cup down on the top of a smaller arcade game and reaches her hand into her pocket. She retrieves her hand after rummaging for a few seconds, opening her palm to reveal some chewing gum, a condom, a five-dollar bill and two arcade tokens. She takes the two tokens and drops them into Beca's hand, then shoves the rest back into her pocket.

"Thanks." Beca nods with a smirk, but she can't deny that she's nervous. These last two tokens determine whether or not she 'gets the girl' and she wants more than anything to tell Chloe how she feels, even though it scares the crap out of her.

The first token slots into the machine and both girls watch the claw, pleading for it to grip onto the red panda and carry it over to the prize drop. But when it slips from the claw, Beca isn't really surprised, she has never been good at claw machines so she doesn't know why she thought this would be a good idea.

"Last one BM," Amy eyes the last token in the brunette's hand and sends a reassuring grin her way.

This seems to be enough encouragement for Beca because she lifts her hand up and slides the final token into the slot on the machine. She exhales loudly, then clamps her mouth shut after taking in a sharp breath.

Her left hand runs through her hair, trying to get rid of some of the anxious energy. The button under her palm is finally pressed and the arcade game springs to life.

She guides the tiny lever until the claw is directly above the red panda, the four claws positioned so it can easily access the stuffed animal.

Beca shifts her gaze from the machine to Amy, who is standing beside her, she shuffles to the side and peers at the claw, examining the accuracy. She nods and flashes Beca a wide smile.

They both stare intensely into the machine, watching the exact movements of the claw. Beca presses the red button and the claw ever so slowly drops down.

It reaches into the pile of stuffed animals and grips tight onto the red panda, it's a firm hold which is promising, but Beca doesn't allow herself to breathe or say anything in case she jinxes it.

The claw rises back up, still gripping onto the bear securely. It carries it all the way to the bottom corner of the machine – to Beca's left – and releases it over the prize drop. The red panda falls into the empty space and Beca's face lights up at the realisation that she has finally won.

"Holy fucking shit. We did it!" Beca drops down to her knees and retrieves the stuffed animal from the flap at the bottom. She clutches it to her chest and takes note of its cuteness. She is so sure that Chloe is going to love it. "Thanks Amy, I love you so much right now."

Fat Amy is just as excited as Beca, grinning from ear to ear and jumping from one foot to the other. She's pretty sure that she wouldn't object to vertical running right now.

"Not as much as you love ginger." She replies in a singsong tone, teasing the smaller girl.

Beca's expression is displaying a mixture of emotions, she's feeling euphoric and she can't wipe the smile off her face. But there are also a lot of nerves present. She's sort of freaking out because now that she's won the prize she has to actually give it to Chloe, in aditition to confessing her feelings. Beca has never been good at talking about feelings or even understanding how she felt at times so knowing she is seconds away from confessing her love to her best friend is pretty damn frightening.

Losing repeatedly gave her more time to procrastinate and put off the inevitable, but now she hasn't got anything in her way.

After releasing a heavy sigh, Beca shakes her hands, attempting to hype herself up. "Shit. Am I really about to do this?"

"Go get her tiger." Amy presses her hand to Beca's back and forces her forwards a little. Beca gets the hint and moves her feet at her own pace, leading herself towards the other Bellas who are still standing next to the candy floss stand.

Beca switches the red panda to her left hand and drags it behind her back, blocking it from the Bellas view. Amy is behind her and knowing she has her support gives her all the encouragement she needs. If this goes badly at least she knows that Amy will be drinking with her later.

"Hey guys," Beca says, smiling even though she feels like she's about to throw up.

Chloe steps forward, her hands also trapped behind her back, "Becs, where have you been?" She asks, but she doesn't leave time for Beca to answer before speaking again. "I got you something."

The redhead pulls her hand from behind her back and reveals a stick of pink candyfloss. She pushes it forwards, passing it over to Beca. The two share a smile, one that lingers after their gaze shifts from each other.

"Thanks, Chlo." Beca grins at the candyfloss, then back at her best friend.

The other Bellas are standing back, no one daring to say a word, not wanting to risk bursting the bubble created by their two captains.

It's blatantly obvious to anyone that knows the two girls, that they are just meant to be together. The Bellas know them best, so they identify the longing glances and growing smiles between the two girls. They have watched two of their best friend's pine over each other for the last three years.

They know it's finally going to happen, and they don't want to ruin a thing.

"I didn't know where you were, and I didn't want you to miss out on the candy floss. You said it was your favourite." Chloe smiles sweetly, meeting Beca's eyes again. The dark blue misty eyes belonging to her best friend are her favourite and she finds herself falling deeper into them each time.

"It is," She nods, "Thank you. But, um, I actually have something for you as well."

Chloe's eyes light up, "You do?"

"Yeah. Close your eyes and put your hands out." Without question, Chloe does as Beca says, closing her eyes, opening her hands and pushing them forwards. She trusts Beca wholeheartedly so she knows Beca isn't about to so something that will make her feel uncomfortable.

The smile on Chloe's lips only grows as the seconds go by. She has no idea what to expect, yet simply just because it is Beca, she's full of excitement. Beca takes note of the smile and finds herself grinning in response.

The younger girl takes a step closer, pulling her hand from behind her and lifting the red panda onto Chloe's open palms. As the Bellas watch the interaction, they all have their own smiles, Emily is even close to tears.

"Okay. Open."

Chloe snaps her eyes open, taking in the sight of the red panda stuffed animal in front of her. Her entire face lights up even more and she gushes over the cuddly toy.

Her eyes find Beca's once again and both of their smiles are so full of love, that right here Beca is so sure that Chloe feels the same. She can see it in her eyes, and Beca knows Chloe better than anyone, at times she knows exactly how Chloe is feeling based off of the look in her eye.

In this moment, Beca's expression mirrors Chloe's, confirming that she is as in love with her as she is with Chloe. For once Amy is right.

"Do you like it?" Beca asks nervously.

Chloe grins, and nods her head lightly. Before she's even acknowledged her own actions her hands are around Beca's body, embracing her in a hug. Beca reacts quickly, wrapping her own hands around Chloe, squeezing back a little.

They pull away from the embrace after a few seconds, but neither girl lets go of the others hand.

"Becs, oh my god. It's a red panda. I love it so much. Thank you." Chloe squeals, and the sight makes Beca's heart throb in her chest. She takes a second to process that she is the reason why Chloe is so happy right now.

The brunette shrugs, smirking, hiding her inner freak out.

"I can't believe you won me this." Chloe squeezes Beca's hand, reminding her that they are still holding hands.

"First try and everything."

Chloe's smile hasn't stopped growing, but she can't help it. Beca makes her so happy and she loves seeing the soft, loving, caring side of her best friend. Another squeal leaves her lips and she clutches the red panda to her chest.

"Do you have a name for it?" Beca asks, glancing down at it and then back up to Chloe, completely forgetting the rest of the Bellas are here. "Please don't name him Mr Panda."

A giggle leaves Chloe's lips and it has Beca smiling once again. It's rare that Beca smiles yet today she hasn't stopped smiling. Chloe is the reason for that. When she's around Chloe, smiling is contagious.

"Mr Panda is an aca-awesome name." Chloe says, which makes Beca role her eyes.

"Sure." Beca nods, "But it's a red panda so-"

Chloe interrupts her when she has another idea, "How about we name him 'red'?"

Beca doesn't miss the use of 'we' and it runs through her mind on a repetitive loop for the few seconds that she doesn't respond. Chloe actually said 'we' meaning he is theirs, something the two of them will share. Granted he is only a stuffed animal, but simply sharing something with Chloe makes Beca's heart soften.

She really wishes she and Chloe can share something more – a kiss, or maybe even a bond of never-ending love. Because she has loved Chloe for as long as she can remember, from the moment she first set eyes on the redhead at the activities fair she knew she wanted her. It may have just been lust at first, Beca couldn't – and still can't – deny that Chloe is fucking attractive, but her feelings towards the girl only heightened when they landed naked and hot and wet in the dorm shower together.

Beca is sure that if Chloe made a move on her that day, she would have mirrored her actions and kissed her back just as passionately, possibly enforcing something more than a kiss.

She thinks about that all the time, more frequently than she'd like to admit.

The brunette is about to comment on the fact that 'Red' is one of Beca's nicknames for Chloe, but the older girl speaks up again before she has the chance.

"Will you be Red's other mom?" She asks, with a small, almost shy smile on her face.

Chloe Beale does not get shy, that just isn't part of who she is. The redhead is pretty confident and is never afraid to speak her mind yet standing in front of Beca – the girl she's been in love with for the past three years – her expression is bashful. She's almost wary, afraid of Beca rejecting the suggestion. As stupid as it sounds, Chloe really hopes – wants – needs, Beca to say yes. She wants the two of them to be co-parents as well as co-captains. Even if their kid is just a stuffed animal.

It's a pathetic thought but the idea causes tingles to flow all over her body.

If Beca accepts the offer then it's one step closer to Chloe confessing her feelings, which means it increases the possibility of them becoming girlfriends and eventually becoming actual co-parents to actual human babies.

Chloe can't hold back the smile that takes over her entire face.

Amy's previous words are still very present in Beca's mind, 'She loves you as much as you love her.'

Beca loves Chloe so fucking much. It's really no exaggeration when Beca says she'd do anything for Chloe. She literally joined the Bellas for Chloe. Everything she's ever done since she met the girl was for Chloe.

So, if Chloe even loves Beca half as much as that then it's worth the shot.

Amy was right about one thing, Beca is completely oblivious, they both are, because they've both been in love with each other since the day they met but it's taken them this long to finally do something about it. They've finally acknowledged that these feelings might not be one sided after all.

"You want me to be?" Beca asks cautiously, but there is still a slight smile still growing on her face.

Chloe's nod is clarification enough, and it sparks something inside of Beca. That nod is exactly what Beca has been hoping for. Chloe wants Beca to be with her, to share something special, and this is just the beginning.

"Come here." Beca says, holding her hand out for Chloe.

The redhead takes Beca's hand and instantly falls into her arms. Beca's hands find chloe's waist and Chloe wraps her arms over the younger girl's shoulders, locking her hands together behind her neck.

It's kind of perfect how well their bodies fit together. Wrapped up in each other's arms, they shape together perfectly, like they were made for each other - moulded as one.

Chloe is the one to break the contact, pulling away from the embrace, but she can't bare to let go of Beca so she reaches for her hand, gripping onto it, afraid that it might slip away - that Beca might slip away.

A pair of bright, ocean blue eyes meets the dark blue (with hints of grey) eyes. Neither girl breaks the eye contact, smiling at each other as if they're sharing a secret - in a way they are, but it's not going to be a secret for much longer.

Their thought process are so alike, they can tell what the other is thinking - feeling, and they both want to show just how much love they have for each other.

The older senior reaches her hand towards Beca's face and cups her cheek softly, her thumb carressing her skin in swift motions. Beca can feel her cheeks warm up underneath Chloe's touch.

As Chloe inches her face closer to Beca's, the brunette leans in. Their movement is slow, neither girl wanting to rush the moment that they've been waiting for - and fantasising about - for so long.

Their lips meet in the middle, but when they eventually touch, they crash together and all the thoughts about taking things slow have instantly been forgotten.

The kiss is messy and desperate.

Beca's tongue swipes across Chloe's bottom lip, and within seconds she's granted access.

Their tongues explore each other's mouths, memorising everything before Beca pulls away. Chloe's bottom lip is between her teeth, she tugs on it gently before letting go.

Seconds after breaking the kiss, Chloe pushes forwards again, recapturing Beca's lips with her own.

The second kiss is slower, yet more passionate.

"Bhloe is finally happening!" Amy shouts, her grin widening. Both Beca and Chloe hear her - she's not exactly quiet - but neither girl pulls away. Their contact is too precious and in their little bubble everything feels out of this world, they just want a little longer to appreciate that.

The blonde turns to face the rest of the bellas, who are all mirroring her expression. They've wanted 'Bhloe' to happen for so long, shipping their two friends since the beginning and now it's finally happening they are beyond happy for the girls.

"I still think 'Bechloe' is better." Stacie mentions, and a few of the girls nod in agreement.

"Bhloe." Fat Amy replies sternly, "But whatever. Let's leave these two lovebirds to it."

One by one, all of the Bellas begin to walk away. Jessica and Ashley disappearing before the others, heading towards the carousel hand in hand. Cynthia Rose, Stacie, Flo and Lily shift to the right, directing their attention to a row of carnival games.

The youngest of the Bellas is still in slight shock, she's always looked up to Beca and Chloe, and believed them to be her 'aca-parents' so watching the scene unfold in front of her eyes makes her so happy.

"Come on Legacy," Fat Amy says, tugging at Emily's cardigan and pulling her with her as she walks over to the other Bellas.

The two girls wait to break the contact until they're certain all the Bellas have left. Chloe presses a chaste kiss to Beca's lips once more before pulling away slowly, wanting nothing more than to press her lips back against Beca's.

A content smile plays at Chloe's lips as Beca's fingers drift down her arms until they find her hands, connecting them together then intertwining their fingers.

"So, where to first?" Beca asks, glancing around them at the different stands and booths as well as the rides towering over them.

With the biggest grin Chloe can muster, she tugs Beca's hand and pulls at her wrist gently. "The Ferris wheel?" Chloe suggests. Her eyes are sparkling with excitement and the smile on her lips light up her entire face.

It just makes Beca swoon all over again.

She can't imagine ever loving anyone else as much as she loves Chloe. But maybe someday she will. The day their child is born.

What the fuck has happened to the badass Beca effin' Mitchell? Before she met Chloe, she was so sure she was never going to have children, yet now she finds herself imagining starting a family with the girl.

The brunette lets out a laugh, and grins at the older girl. "I had a feeling you'd say that. Come on." It's Beca's turn to tug on Chloe's arm, leading her towards the Ferris wheel.

They manage to jump straight on the ride as there is no queue. The two settle next to each other, Chloe's arm reaching behind the smaller girls and Beca finds herself leaning into Chloe, placing her head on her shoulder.

Beca shuffles a little, lifting her head up so she can look at Chloe.

The way Chloe is looking at her causes a warm blush to run over her cheeks. Their gaze is so intense that Beca has to look away for a second, her blush only enhancing as Chloe's fingers trace patterns on her wrist, leaving behind a hot trail of tingles.

Her breath hitches when Chloe brings her hand to her lips and kisses it softly.

Beca's gaze snaps up to meet Chloe's again, her lips curling up into a smile, loving how it feels to have Chloe looking at her like that. It's the way she's been looking at Chloe for the last three years, but now that Beca really thinks about it, Chloe's been looking at her this way for a while, maybe even the whole time.

How the hell did she miss that?

Beca twists her position and turns to look at Chloe. They are nearing the top of the wheel now but Beca isn't paying attention to the view. As cheesy as it is, Chloe is the only beautiful view she wants to look at.

"Can I tell you a secret?" Beca whispers, close to Chloe's ear. It's so intimate, it's meant for only their ears.

A secret only they share.

A hot shiver runs up Chloe's neck, Beca's breath is warm against her ear and the urge to grab her and kiss the shit out of her grows by the second.

"Yeah." Chloe nods, it's so quiet it's almost a whimper.

Beca doesn't waste any time, somewhat afraid that the ride will be over or come to a halt before she can get the words out. She's spent the last three years hiding her feelings from her best friend and she doesn't want to do it anymore.

She lifts her lips and presses a kiss to Chloe's skin, just under her ear. Beca pulls back and is instantly lost in Chloe's ocean blue eyes, they're beautiful, she's never seen eyes so perfect, so mesmerising. Chloe's eyes are the direct route to her soul and she's so lucky to be the one that gets to know Chloe's soul better than anyone else.

"I love you." Beca says, barely above a whisper, but they are so close that Chloe can hear exactly what she just said even over the eruption of loud music and playful screams.

"I don't want to freak you out by saying this, but I have a pretty good feeling now that we're co-parents that you'll be okay with it, more than okay maybe. Chlo, I love you. I've loved you for a while now and it's freaking me out, but I think you're freaking out too, so I was kind of hoping that we could...freak out together?"

Chloe's grip on Beca's hand tightens. Beca has always managed to ground her, when she's overly emotional or too excited just having some form of physical contact with Beca has always calmed her and brought her back to the present. This is no exception.

Chloe opens her mouth to say something but she can't get much out before Beca cuts her off.

"Becs-"

"Oh fuck. I've totally blown it haven't I?" Beca groans, her eyes dropping to her lap and a frown settling on her face.

Chloe's giggling makes Beca lift her head up, hating the fact that Chloe finds it so funny. But when Beca looks up at Chloe, she knows she isn't laughing at her for what she said. Chloe's bright blue eyes are glistened with tears, threatening to spill.

Before the brunette can acknowledge what is happening, Chloe's lips are attached to hers again, kissing her softly. Once Beca finally gets her head around what is happening, that somehow she hasn't 'totally blown it' after all, she kisses back, mirroring Chloe's passion.

"You don't know how long I've waited to hear you say that." She whispers against Beca's lips.

She feels Beca smile into the kiss, then pulls away slowly, pressing their foreheads together. Chloe reaches down and grasps onto Beca's hand.

Her tears finally spill, releasing three years worth of pent up emotions from believing that the love was simply unrequited.

Now she knows it's not.

Beca loves her too, and that's all she needs to know to give her enough courage to say it back, knowing she isn't alone in this anymore, and she never really has been.

"I love you too, Becs." Chloe says.

Beca brings her hands up to cup both of Chloe's cheeks, stroking away the stray tears with her thumbs. Her soft strokes only encourage another sob to break free from Chloe, and Beca's eyes gloss with tears of her own.

The brunette smiles playfully as she takes a glance down at their child in Chloe's lap. She has to admit, The Red Panda is pretty darn adorable, but no where near as adorable as her redhead.

Her gaze drifts back up to Chloe's and she leans in to press their lips together, initiating another kiss.

She's expressing every single feeling towards Chloe in this one kiss and it takes everything in her to pull away. If she had it her way, their lips would never leave each other's, but they kind of have to get off this ride.

The cart tilts forwards, slowly taking them back down to the ground. After a few seconds, the ride stills, coming to a halt at the bottom.

They're back where they started - only now they feel lighter, they've finally confessed their feelings to one another.

The love they share is so passionate and real which is why they know they'll be okay. No matter what happens they have each other, neither girl is going anywhere anytime soon, and for now, it's enough.

They can freak out together and maybe even bicker over silly things, but they'll come out stronger in the end.

Because they're Beca and Chloe. Together they're Bhloe, and everyone LOVES a good Blowie.

------

also on wattpad: @writteninbechloe

#bechloe #bechloe au #beca mitchell #bechloe fanfic #chloe beale #annakendrick #brittany snow #Pitch Perfect #pitch perfect fanfiction #a token of your love #Wattpad

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writerseven · 4 years

Text

The next installment of props was giving me trouble, so I ended up doing some warm up writing in the form of flipping a scene from runaway to Dick's perspective.

I'm not posting this officially since it's super unpolished, probably redundant, and potentially even contradicting future fics in the series since I just wrote it as an exercise, but I figured I'd drop it here because this sort of thing is what I made this tumblr for in the first place. Enjoy this unedited minifc!

The kiss catches him completely off guard. Dick's brain gets caught in a loop of What? No, wait, why? What? Wrong-wrong-wrong, for a beat too long, before he realizes he has hand and should be using them. Frantic action takes over from shocked stillness, and he pushes Tim away a little rougher than intended.

Dick opens his mouth to—he doesn't know. Apologize? Ask what the fuck that was? Just gape aimlessly? It doesn't matter; Tim speaks before he can:

“Sorry! Oh god. I'm sorry.”

Tim looks genuinely horrified at his own actions, hand hovering over his mouth unconsciously, and it's the push Dick needs to get ahold of himself. He needs to—he needs to cut this right off at the root. Whatever wrong impression he's given, whatever wires has been crosses, he needs to fix that shit right now.

“Tim...” he says, trying to figure out where to start.

“Sorry,” Tim says, breathing hard.

Dick feels his brow pinching, heartbeat much faster than reasonable for a completely danger-free scenario. “I'm...Shit. I'm—way older than you, and you're a kid.” Oh, great, just really patronize Tim away while he's at it. “Which I know no teenager wants to hear, but I...”

Tim shakes his head, slinking further back against the couch. “No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have...”

Dick shakes his head slightly, trying to get this all out before it blows up. “I know you have a family and parents of your own, but when I call you my little brother, I really—I really do mean it.”

“I know that,” Tim says, looking down. “I know. I'm sorry. I wasn't even really—I don't even...I'm sorry. I don't know why I did that.”

The thing is, he seems completely honest about it. Completely distraught. Dick has...well, he's done stupid self-destructive stuff in all the wrong moments and not known why, but that was always predicated by something. Something he was dealing with really poorly.

A hands grips his heart before he breathes deep and forces it to release. There are still a million explanations; he doesn't know for sure that it's bad. It really could just be a kid with an inappropriate crush. Hell, Dick himself had a little hero-worship thing going on for about half the Justice League back when he was a tiny pre-teen in pixie boots.

Tim is pulling away, off the couch. “I'm sorry,” he says, stronger. “I should—I can go. I'm gonna go.”

Dick leans out to catch him on instinct, grabbing his hand. “Hey, wait, don't—”

Tim stops, but won't meet his eye. Dick scans over him carefully, lingering on those stark neck bruises for a moment, and tries to remind himself not to get worried when there might be nothing to worry about.

“What happened?” Dick asks, keeping his voice level. Tim glances up and away again. “I mean—” He swallows, trying to sort out a phrasing that implies the least. “Can you at least tell me what brought this on?”

“I don't know,” Tim mutters, rocking on his heels. It's such a guilty child's motion that Dick can't help but squeeze his hand. “I guess I just...thought you'd be nice about it.”

No, no, nonono.

“Be nice about what?” Dick asks softly, terrified he knows.

Tim glances up, exactly as ashamed and scared and desperate as Dick hoped he wouldn't be. Dick abruptly realizes he's still clutching onto Tim's hand, giving the kid no choice in the matter, and drops it, clearing his throat.

Okay. He's—If this is what he thinks it is, he knows how to do this. (And, god, he heard a million awful comments back when he was running Gotham's seedy streets, even as a kid, but he never thought anything would happen to Tim.) If this is that, Dick knows how to deal with victims, how to be calm but soft, ask without judgment. And if it's not, none of that can hurt. His back straightens on instinct.

“Can I hug you, or do you want space?” Dick asks.

Tim is in his arms almost before he's finished the question. Dick wraps him up immediately, tugging him closer onto the couch, practically in his lap. Tim would probably say he's too old for it, but Dick can't help but perpetually think of his little brother as younger than Dick ever was, even knowing that's far from the truth.

“I really am sorry,” Tim mumbles into his shoulder. “I didn't...mean it like that.”

“I know,” Dick says. He's wished so strongly he didn't, but it's worth it if he can use it to help Tim. They can do this. He's not going to let his brother deal alone. “I'm...I understand.” The words get caught in his throat, refusing to dislodge. Dick can't manage to say any of it more explicitly than, “I think I really, really do.”

He closes his eyes over Tim's hair, gentling rubbing his back. For a few minutes it's just that, and Dick lets himself get away with the delay on the thought that Tim needs it and they both deserve to calm down.

He still doesn't actually know, though. Dick is pretty sure he has the vague shape of it. The general category of what happened—or almost happened, if he's lucky, maybe just a scare—the ensuing feelings he knows far too well, the urge to reclaim it. But nothing has been said. He has to be sure he's not just projecting.

“I,” Dick starts, so, so slow and cautious, “I do think I still need you to tell me what happened, though. When you're ready. We can just sit here for now.”

“No, it's okay,” Tim says. His voice is a little hoarse, but when he draws back there are no tears in sight. Dick's heart aches for this too-strong kid. “It's...nothing. I'm handling it. I'm sorry I freaked out on you.”

“Tim...” Dick frowns.

Tim pulls away, returning to his seat on the couch. It's closer this time, though, one of Dick's arms lingering over his shoulder without a reach. His throat works hard a few times, drawing attention to those bruises. They're definitely finger-shaped. Dick has seen too many like that not to know.

He lifts a hand to examine them better, not thinking, and Tim—flinches. Hard, like Dick punched instead of barely brushed him. Dick's heart leaps in response.

“Sorry,” he breathes.

“S'okay,” Tim says, though he's a little breathless himself.. “The—the bruise, y'know.”

Dick clenches his jaw at the blatant lie. “It wasn't the bruise, Tim.”

Tim shrinks in on himself, even his voice lowering. “It's just. You know...Batman stuff.” His eyes flick up, bright and desperate on Dick's. “I'm sure you dealt with the same kind of stuff when you were Robin.”

He doesn't react. He's so goddamn careful not to react because now is not the situation to be losing it, and not the person to be losing it in front of, and not the time to be losing it when, again, he doesn't actually know anything. Not for sure. Not really.

But Dick's heart slams against his rib cage and his brain lights up every siren.

That doesn't mean what he thinks it means. That does not mean what he thinks it means. It doesn't even—there's not even anything like this that Dick “dealt with” when he was Robin. He doesn't even know why his brain is going there. Sure, Bruce can be distant or cold or manipulative or, much as he hates to admit, on occasion selfish to the point of cruelty, but Dick doesn't have any actual reason to believe...

(Only...) Robin stuff. It's just Robin stuff, those million awful comments Dick heard and Tim must have too. But. Tim did say it was Batman stuff.

Dick takes one more very careful, very steady breath, before he allows himself to speak. He fights to make his voice perfectly even. “Tim, did Bruce...Has Bruce ever...?”

“No, it's not—He's—Bruce is fine,” Tim interrupts quickly.

Dick is hit by relief that he grabs onto with both hands, and then guilt that he refuses to examine.

“He's—” Tim continues. “He just wants to reconnect with Jason, so he's...”

Conflicting emotions come to a screeching halt at that. Okay. Turns out Dick really doesn't know apparently. “Jason?”

He heart does an entirely unrelated funny little twist over saying Jason's name. It's been so long, and thing changed completely while Dick wasn't even there. But somehow his first brother is back, even if Dick is yet to see it himself, and apparently...involved in this?

It's not a hard jump from there. The only time Dick knows of when Jason and Tim have ever interacted led to Tim's near-death at Titan's Tower.

“So Jason...” He puts a hand over his own throat in demonstration instead of indicating Tim's and risking another flinch.

“I mean, I—Both of them, technically...”

Dick's hand stills. There's a horrible weight in his gut, but only one other person has been mentioned this conversation and it's impossible to ignore. He can't muster up the energy for proper emotion when he asks, “Jason and Bruce both...hurt you?”

It takes a long moment, before Tim nods.

No. Dick scrubs over his face like he's chasing phantom tears. It's like he's simultaneously too emotional and too numb to actual conjure any. The block in his throat doesn't feel like crying; it just aches.

“But Bruce isn't usually...” Tim is saying, Dick unable to answer.

He twists away, towards the couch, elbows digging into the backrest and face shoving into his palms. What he really wants to do it hit something heavy and solid and painful, but this is best he can get without hurting himself in front of Tim. No.

That's it. Just no. No, not this. No, it's a mistake. No, he's wrong. No, no, no, Dick has misunderstood and made leaps where he shouldn't and put the pieces together in the wrong puzzle.

But Tim's neck is bruised by hands, and he kissed Dick because he thought Dick was safe and that's—

Dick is still a pretty good detective, even when he doesn't want to be.

It's the hardest word in the universe to force out, barely able to peak through his hands towards Tim. “Sexually?”

Tim nods.

Dick selfishly, horribly, stays quiet as Tim tries to course correct and near-pleads with him for validation. He can't. If he opens his mouth he might scream.

#props series #it also cuts off abruptly because that's where i decided i had gotten into the groove enough and could move on to the actual fic #wrote this edited nothing bon apetit #7fic

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babbushka · 5 years

Note

I'M CRYIGN FLIP TRIES SO HARD I APPRECIATE HIM (coincidence im eating in a chinese resto rn). HE LIKES YOU SO MUCHHH HE DESERVES THE LOVE. Its been in my head and this maybe a biiiit angsty but what is the first big argument between young Flip and her? (Had a feeling this will be a bit silly misunderstanding) -cauliflower

The only big fight you’ve ever really had with Flip was when you were dating for literally like a month maybe.

One day he’s on his way to pick you up from work, he’s been thinking about taking you up to the cabin for the first time (and hopefully get lucky ayyoo) so he’s in a really good mood -- until he sees you talking with Landers.

[Backstory, Flip and Landers Do Not Get Along. They never have, ever since Landers played dirty at a game of basketball against Flip’s team for the high school championships, tripped Flip and cost him the game. He and Landers have had a bit of a rivalry throughout high school and it doesn’t really go away after they grow up (boys ugh lol).]

So when he sees you, the absolute love of his life, talking to Landers his blood kinda gets hot -- both with jealousy and rage. Especially when he can tell that you’re super uncomfortable via your face and body language, because the way Landers is invading your personal space is a little too friendly.

He parks the truck outside the library and slams the door, marches straight up to Landers and steps in between the two of you.

He does the whole “Leave her the fuck alone.” to which you’re like “I’m handling it Flip.” which he acutely ignores with a “yeah yeah okay -- listen pal she doesn’t want to fucking talk to you”.

You don’t like being completely brushed off like that, especially from Flip, “I said I was handling it Flip!” but he doesn’t hear it, he’s too consumed with rage at just the sight of him.

He gets a little too up in Landers’ face, Landers shoves him, and they get into a full blown fist fight to let out years of pent up anger and bitter rivalry towards one another.

You are not happy about it and you go from being annoyed to livid, so you try and push yourself in the middle of the fight to break it up because the cops are probably going to get called any fucking second and you’re gonna lose your job and what if Flip gets hurt and he can’t work --

and you accidentally get shoved to the ground from the scuffle.

And Time Stands Still when Flip and Landers both realize that you’ve fallen.

You’re all stunned, you’ve never been knocked over like that, even on accident, and tears are threatening at the corner of your eyes just from the shock of it and Flip rushes to help you up but you smack his hands away and just start walking in the direction of your house.

Landers sees that things are going to get ugly so he vanishes, leaving Flip to chase after you.

“(Y/N)!” He shouts your name but you don’t listen, so he panics and gets in his car and drives like 20 miles below the speed limit to keep pace with you as he’s trying to convince you to “Get in the fucking car!!”

“Just leave me the fuck alone Phil!” You shout back, clutching your books to your chest and trying so so so hard not to cry, and he knows he’s in deep shit when you use his real name like that.

Cars are pissed off at him as they beep and try and get around him and eventually just for safety sake you get in the car but you don’t talk to him the entire car ride.

When he arrives in front of your house, he parks the car and the two of you just sit there in silence, and he’s terrified you’re going to break up with him. Eventually, you don’t even bother looking at him when you say,

“If you ever ignore me or speak for me like that again, you can consider this thing between us finished.”

“I was trying to help.”

“I tried telling you that I didn’t need your help, Flip. I’m a big girl, I can handle some creep hitting on me.”

“I’m sorry it’s just Landers is the fucking worst and the thought of him even looking at you makes my skin crawl.”

“So the answer is you punch him? For fuck’s sake Flip, what, are you going to punch every guy who looks at me?”

“I just -- ”

“I love you but you can be such an asshole sometimes, you know that?” (it’s the first time you say I Love You and Flip tries really really hard not to dwell on that fact in the moment but when he gets home it’s all he can think about)

“How am I the asshole in this scenario?? I was defending you!!”

“You talked over me, ignored me, and then shoved me to the ground!”

“That was an accident and you know it.”

“It wouldn’t have happened in the first place if you had just let me deal with him and you know it.”

And then you’re both staring at each other, too stubborn to let the other win.

Eventually you just sigh and collect your books and get out, lingering by the car door before you close it.

“(Y/N)?” He asks, pleads, doesn’t even know what he’s asking for he’s just so so so so fucking terrified that he’s going to lose you over this minor thing.

“I’ll call you.” You say softly, but you don’t look happy, and you close the door with a little more force than necessary.

Flip watches you go into the house and for the first time in over a year of knowing you, you don’t turn around to wave him goodbye.

You don’t call him for three days after that.

It rains every single day. He spends his time being angry and confused and his whole family is just Tense. His mom just offers to hug him real tight and he talks with her about what went wrong and she gives him advice that he hates but he takes it:

He finds Landers and the two of them make a truce (Landers feels like shit about the whole thing and promises to leave you alone). They both agree that it’s not worth it to keep petty high school rivalries alive, no matter how shitty they were to each other.

He’s on edge, any time the phone rings he barely lets it go one ring before he’s answering, hoping it’s you.

On the fourth day, when the phone rings he answers it, and it’s you and he tries really hard not to cry as apologies tumble out of his mouth.

“I’m sorry, (Y/N) you were right I was being jealous and over-protective and I let my temper get the better of me and I’m so sorry, I spoke to Landers and we made a truce and I won’t punch people unless you explicitly ask me to and I’ll listen to you I swear I will.”

“Come over?” You ask, and you sound like you’re about to cry too and he literally runs -- runs -- in the rain to your house because his dad took the car lol, and he’s soaking wet and he’s standing outside your house and you run out in the rain and kiss him and he holds you so tight and the two of you just kiss and he presses his forehead against yours and the both of you apologize for yelling, because neither of you want to be that couple who yells, and you kiss him again and finally you’re smiling.

#reader insert #flip zimmerman x reader #young flip #:)#Anonymous #cowboy answers

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returnn-of-the-mac · 5 years

Note

Want some angst? Probably not, but I'm giving it to you anyways! Imagine if Sosu was actually affected by the radiation in the wasteland. So, basically, I'm requesting companions (And whoever you want to add in there) reacting to Sosu getting radiation sickness. Not turning in to a ghoul or anything, just, fumking suffering.

Oooh man this one was fun! I’d forgotten how much I liked writing angst! I hope you like it! (Also: I’m on mobile right now, so pardon the large gaps and the lack of a “read me.” I’ll fix that once I get back home😊)

Fallout 4 Companions React Headcanon: Sole Critically Ill From Radiation Poisoning

Sole and their companion had been venturing out toward the Glowing Sea when the pair stumbled upon a building apparently known as the “Electrical Hobbyist’s Club.” The place looked small enough, so Sole insisted that their companion stand guard outside while they scavenged around the decrepit building.

Danse: Danse shifted around uncomfortably in his power armor. “I have a premonition that something terrible is going to happen in there,” the Paladin muttered to himself, “I shouldn’t have let them venture in there alone. I was negligent of my duty as their commanding officer. Maybe I should-“ before he could finish his sentence, he saw a sickly Sole slowly crawling down the building’s ramp. “Soldier!” He bellowed, running up to his partner. “What’s…what’s going on? You look so frail.” Sole struggled to raise their head to look at their concerned companion. Then everything went black. Danse, now fully alert, promptly scooped up Sole’s limp body in his arms and used a Vertibird signal. He knew he needed to get Sole to Knight-Captain Cade as soon as possible. As he held his sickly companion close and waited for the aircraft, he verbally released his pent-up self-disappointment “Goddammit! Why didn’t I follow my instincts? I knew this would happen. If I had just accompanied [him/her], this could have been prevented. I’ve failed [him/her] just like all of the others who have fallen under my command.”

Piper: Piper was casually smoking a cigarette when she saw Sole crawling down the ramp. “Well there you are! I was beginning to brainstorm some catchy headline for a missing person’s article!” When she saw that Sole was unresponsive, she sensed that something was wrong. She immediately stomped out the remainder of the cigarette and rushed to her companion’s aid. “Blue! Oh Blue! What happened in there? Are you okay? Look at me Blue. Look at me.” Sole fainted. Piper gasped in alarm and held her companion against her, shaking them gently. “ [Name]? [name]? Say something. Anything! Please!” She desperately gave Sole all kinds of food and medicine in an attempt to help them.

Strong: Strong was standing with his arms crossed and pouting. “Bah! Why human leave Strong behind. Human not care about Strong. Strong leaving back to tower.” Before Strong could walk away, he noticed Sole crawling down the ramp. “There you are! Strong angry! Strong leaving!” Strong stopped yelling when he noticed his partner facedown in the dirt. “Human?” Strong flipped Sole over and realized that his partner was in critical condition. Strong picked Sole up and threw them over his shoulder. “Don’t worry, human. Strong help. Strong bring you to medicine man.”

Ada: Ada was rummaging for junk when she detected movement nearby. She scanned the area and noticed Sole crawling down the ramp. “[Sir/Ma’am]? My systems have detected that your functionality levels are critically low— a mere 2%. I will now run a mandatory diagnostics scan.” Ada scanned Sole and analyzed the findings. “The troubleshoot has indicated a dangerously high level of Radiation in your body. Immediate medical assistance is required. I shall send out a distress signal for help.”

Hancock: Hancock was taking a hit of jet when he saw Sole crawling down the ramp. “Hey there, pal. You ain’t lookin too hot.” Sole tried to look at Hancock, but failed to raise their head more than a few inches. Hancock frowned. “What happened in there? Take in too many Rads? When I suggested you to go ghoul I didn’t actually mean it.” Sole passed out. Hancock sighed. “I am not high enough to deal with this shit right now.” After popping a few Mentats, Hancock directed his attention back to Sole. “Now. Let’s see if I can work some magic here with the year of medicine I was forced to study back in the Diamond City days.”

Gage: “Damn. What the hell are they doin in there? We ain’t got all day!” Gage muttered. “Hey boss! Hurry the hell up in there!” Gage then noticed Sole crawling down the ramp. “You okay? You ain’t lookin too hot.” Sole managed to drag themself to the bottom of the ramp before blacking out. “Wha— shit!” Gage jogged over to Sole, crouched down, and started shaking them. “Wake up, boss. This ain’t funny. I’m serious. I swear, I’ll kick your ass if you’re messin with me right now.” When Gage realized that his partner was in critical condition, he rummaged through his inventory to find anything that would help. His search was unsuccessful. “Ain’t got much of anythin useful on me now, but I’ll get the good shit. Hang in there for a little longer, boss.”

Longfellow: Longfellow was eying a radstag when he heard movement coming from behind him. He turned around to see Sole dragging themself down the ramp. “Hm, what’s wrong, [name]? Throw out your back? That happens with old age. One day you’re a strapping, young buck, the next your a feeble, old goose.” Sole passed out. “Christ almighty! You’ve seen better days, haven’t ya?” Longfellow gently picked up Sole’s limp body. “Time to get you to a medic. You’ll be okay.”

Codsworth: Codsworth was humming to himself when he saw Sole crawling down the ramp. “[Sir/Mum]!” He cried as he rushed over to his limp companion. “What on earth happened to you?” When Sole was unresponsive, Codsworth activated medicine mode. He immediately got to work tending to Sole. After a few moments, Sole regained consciousness and was able to recover.

X6-88: X6 was sitting on a rock when he noticed Sole crawling down the ramp. He walked over to his partner. “[Sir/Ma’am], you do not look well. I am cutting this mission to the Glowing Sea short; we can resume it at a later date. You need medical attention right away.” X6 picked up Sole and teleported then to the Institute.

Cait: Cait was polishing her shotgun with an old dishrag she found nearby when she saw Sole crawling down the ramp. “There ye are. I was beginin to think you were gonna spend the night in there. Now quit fumblin’ around and let’s get a move on.” Sole suddenly fainted. Cait rolled her eyes. “Oh come on, quit fuckin with me. It’s not funny.” When Sole didn’t move, Cait began to worry. She walked over to were Sole was lying and crouched down. “Seriously, drop the act. You’re scarin me.” Sole didn’t respond. Cait began violently shaking Sole. “Wake up, god dammit! Please!” She the picked up Sole and tossed them over her shoulder and began her quest to find the nearest doctor.

MacCready: An annoyed MacCready lazily kicked a tin can across the dirt while waiting for his companion. “Hey, you know, if you had maybe told me you were going to be taking your sweet time in there, I wouldn’t have agreed to be the sitting duck!” He called out in frustration. Just then, he saw Sole slowly crawling down the ramp. “Finally. Jeez next time you search a place for a century and a half, you should-“ MacCready paused, sensing that something was off about his partner. “You good, [Name]?” Sole fainted. “[Name]!” MacCready ran over to his limp companion and sat them upright, using his arms and body as support. “No…no no no no. This can’t be happening. Not again. Tell me this isn’t happening again.” MacCready fought back tears as he frantically searched his bag for something to help Sole. “Hang in there, please. I can’t lose you too. Please stay with me, [name].”

Curie: Curie was examining a patch of carrot flowers when she noticed Sole slowly crawling down the ramp. She instantly sensed that something was wrong and rushed to their aid before they could even fully make it down the ramp. “Oh non [Madam/Monseiur]! Please, relax, stop trying to move. You will surely faint if you continue to expend energy in this state.” She got two purified waters out of her bag: one for Sole to drink, and one to hold on Sole’s forehead to cool them down. She gently held Sole as she injected them with a concoction of carefully selected medicine. After a few minutes, Sole was able to recover.

Deacon: “Hmm…do I want to go for the dreamy surgeon, the hunky park ranger, or the kinky fireman look for my next disguise?” Deacon wondered aloud as he waited for his companion. Just as he was about to change his disguise, he noticed Sole weakly dragging themself down the front ramp. “Hey! What do you think my next disguise should be? Maybe Angsty Teenager?” Sole fainted. “Too much? Yeah I don’t really want to wear a spiked choker, to be completely honest. Not my cup of Nuka.” Sole didn’t respond, and Deacon nervously scratched his head. “Earth to [name]! Hello? Anyone home?If you can hear me, say ‘Deacon is the coolest guy in the Commonwealth!’” When Sole remained silent, Deacon realized the gravity of the situation. He crouched down next to Sole and say them up, using his body as support. “Hey, I’m going to contact the HQ and get you some help as soon as possible. Hang in there, pal.”

Nick: Nick was reading a book when he noticed that Sole had been taking a really long time. “Wonder what’s holding them up in there? Maybe I should check on them.” Just as he started making his way to the entrance, Sole pushed themself through the door and started crawling down the ramp. “Oh my God, are you okay?” Nick asked, rushing over to his weak companion. He sat them against the wall. “You’re burning up. Here,” he said, giving Sole a purified water and some crispy squirrel bits. “I’ll contact Ellie and see if she can send out a distress signal out. Don’t worry, pal. We’ll get you fixed up.”

Preston: Preston was pacing around anxiously, waiting for Sole to emerge from the dilapidated building. “The General is taking way too long in there. [He/She] might have gotten into trouble. I have to check-in.” Just as Preston was about to enter the building, Sole weakly pushed themself through the door. “General!” Preston shouted as he rushed over to his struggling companion. He knelt down beside them just as they blacked out. “Goddammit, I’ve done it again!” Preston harshly whispered, tears streaming down his cheeks. “General, I’m so sorry I let you down. But I’m not going to let you die. I’ll contact the nearest settlement and get you treated.”

Dogmeat: Dogmeat patiently waited for his best friend to come back outside. Suddenly, his ears perked. He sensed movement coming from the direction of the building and knew it was Sole. Something was off though. He whimpered and sprinted over to the building at full speed just as Sole weakly pushed through the door. Before Sole could hit the cold, metal ramp, Dogmeat jumped in front of his friend and caught them on his back. Dogmeat widely whimpered as he sensed how critical Sole’s condition was. He didn’t want to leave Sole alone, but he knew they needed help. He began to bark as loud as he could in the hopes of catching someone’s attention. When that failed, he decided to take to the road to try to find someone who could help.

#fallout 4 #fallout #fo4 #danse #paladin danse #deacon #hancock #maccready #cait #piper #ada #strong #curie #preston garvey #longfellow #gage #dogmeat #codsworth #headcanon #hc #x6 88

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motleyfuckingcruee · 5 years

Text

Rocket Queen

0.6: Late Night Conversations

Henley's P.O.V

It's about an hour later after me and Duff had the conversation in the bathroom. Duff ordered the Chinese food so now we're eating it and watching some stupid movie on TV. I sigh, looking at the clock. It's only one in the morning. Fuck, how am I gonna make it home before my parents notice I'm gone? There's only one obvious answer. I can't. Unless I know for a fact that Hyde won't rat me out for being a minor in a bar, I'm stuck here with the blonde I barely know.

And where the hell is Madeline?

"What's goin' through your head?" Duff asks, breaking me from my thoughts.

I look over at him, then back down at my container of sweet n' sour chicken. "How do you know I'm thinking anything? I could just be enjoying my food."

Duff laughs, setting his container on the coffee table. "You have to be thinking of something. I doubt you're just sitting there not having one thought. That's, like, impossible."

I sigh, laughing a bit. He had me there. "You got me." I set my container on the table as well, losing my appetite almost completely. "I-uh-was just thinking about how I'm going to get home before my parents notice that I'm missing. They'll go bonkers if I'm not in my bed in the morning."

"You could just call them and tell them Madeline had an emergency so the both of you went to her place."

I smile at him. He has this hopeful look in his eyes as if he really wants to help. God he's so adorable.

I mentally groan at that thought. I just met the dude! Get that shit out of your head.

"You came up with that pretty quick."

He smiles, puffing out his chest. "I am the king of excuses," He says proudly.

I giggle, rolling my eyes. Damn, I haven't laughed and smiled this much since before Tommy left. "I'll call you up next time I need help with that."

"So, you still live with your parents, huh?"

"What do you mean still? I am only sixteen, y'know?" Did he seriously forget I told him how old I was not even a few hours ago.

Duff's eyes widen. "There's no fucking way."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I narrow my eyes at him.

"I just mean, you act older. I would've thought you were at least eighteen," He explains, taking a swig from the beer that was sitting on the table.

I really hope that's a new one and not a bottle that has just been sitting there for days. It's obvious he doesn't clean often. I cringe watching him drink it.

"What?" He asks. He looks genuinely confused as to why I was looking at him like I am.

I almost laugh at his look. I, however, manage to keep a straight face. "Please tell me it's a new bottle."

Duff looks down at his drink, laughing as he fully processes my statement. "Oh my God, Henley. You're seriously worrying about how old my drink is?"

I shrug, looking down. I feel my cheeks heat up with embarrassment. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything.

Duff's laughter dies down after I stay quiet for a while. I know it's stupid to feel embarrassed like I am, but I can't help it. I don't like it when people laugh at me.

"Henley," Duff says, his laughter still working it's way out of his system. I don't say anything. "Hey," Duff says, his voice quiet and soft. I look up at him, shocked at how his voice changed in a second. "Did I say something wrong?"

I feel my heart drop. He thinks he did something wrong. In reality, I'm just an oversensitive ass. It's amazing how my "Bad ass aura"-as Madeline would call it-disappears as soon as I'm alone with someone I'm comfortable with. I become overly sensitive with everything. I'm like that with Athena, Tommy, and Madeline. And now, apparently, Duff. Fuck, he's broken down the walls I put up within just a few hours. What the hell is wrong with me?

"No," I say, shaking my head. "I'm sorry. I'm just sensitive sometimes."

Duff's face is once again full of disbelief. Damn, do I really surprise him that much?

"What?" I ask, feeling shy with his eyes on me.

He just shrugs, shaking his head. "I just find it hard to believe that the Henley is sensitive. You're one badass chick."

I laugh at his use of the word 'chick'. "You say that as if I'm some notorious girl that has a reputation."

"You kinda do," Duff responds. I furrow my eyebrows. What the hell is that supposed to mean? "Anyways, you never answered my original question."

"Huh?" Then it clicks in my brain. I never did answer his question. Fuck, I don't remember what it was.

"Uhm, what was it again?"

"What were you thinking about before we started this odd conversation," Duff laughs.

"Oh, right," I respond, looking at the TV for a moment. I turn my head to Duff, feeling a smile spread onto my lips. He's so fucking cute. His smile is absolutely adorable. It's different than other people's. I can't really explain it. He's different than other guys I've met. Yes, he did try to kiss me, but he backed off as soon as I pushed him away. He didn't try anything else and he's kept his distance. "I was just thinking about Madeline. Will she be alright with Steven?"

"I'm sure she'll be fine," Duff answers, taking a swig from that same bottle. "She's a big girl. She can handle herself."

I sigh, leaning back against the couch cushions. "I know, it's just that she tends to not think things through. She gets herself into a shit ton of trouble all because she can't keep her mouth shut."

Duff laughs. "Sounds like someone else I know."

I blush, looking down at my lap. God, his laugh is like music to me. "I usually do a good job at shutting up. I was just a bit tipsy. If I get any amount of alcohol in my system, I can't shut up." The fight definitely sobered me up quick.

"Looks like I'll just have to keep my eye on you from now on," Duff says, nudging my thigh with his foot.

I laugh, looking back up at him. "You think we're still going to hang out after all this?"

"Of course we are. You're stuck with me now," Duff answers, giving me a heart melting smile. Fuck me, he's too good at making me feel.

"You say that like it's a bad thing," I say, deciding to be a little flirty. What could it hurt?

Duff shakes his head, running a hand through his gorgeous blonde hair. "It can be sometimes."

"I can't see how. From what I've seen of you since I met you, you're one awesome person to be around. Steven seems pretty cool too," I say, grinning at him.

"Yeah he is, but I can be-."

He's cut off by a sharp knocking at the front door. Duff groans, reluctantly getting off of the couch. He walks over to the door, opening it with a certain amount of sass. I giggle at him as he places his hand on his hip, jutting his hip out like a girl would. He looks back at me and winks. He's such a dork.

All of a sudden a ball of blonde hair pushes past Duff, toting a smaller dark haired person behind him. I grin as Madeline nearly falls from how Steven is pulling her.

"Stevie slow down!" Madeline yells, looking disheveled.

I take it those two had one hell of a night.

Steven laughs, pulling her into his arms. He kisses the top of her head. She grins, wrapping her arms around his waist. I smile at them. They really like each other. I guess I will be seeing more of Duff after all since Madeline will probably be hanging around Steven a lot.

"Aren't you two just adorable," Duff teases, sitting down next to me again. He's closer to me this time.

Just scoot over a little bit more.

I shake my head, trying to clear that thought from my mind. I focus my attention on the new couple in front of me.

Steven flips Duff off, giving one of his signature Steven smiles. "We're heading to bed."

Madeline and Stevie walk down the hallway without another word. "Don't have too much fun, kids!" Duff yells at them.

He's answered with a door slamming.

I giggle. "So I take it you and Steven live together?"

Duff lets out a mock sad sigh. "Yeah. He's such a pain in the ass."

I shake my head, laughing slightly. I yawn, looking at the clock again. Two o'clock in the morning.

"You tired?" Duff asks.

I try to shake my head 'no', but then my body decides to let out another yawn.

"I'll take that as a yes," He laughs, standing up. "Come on."

I get up, walking behind him. I'm way too tired to argue. Duff leads me into a bare room. The most he has is more records and a mattress laying in the floor. Duff walks over to the dresser that I somehow didn't notice, and pulls out some boxers and a shirt. He hands it to me.

"Here," He says. "I'm sure you don't wanna sleep in those clothes."

I smile, looking down at my feet. "Thank you." I walk over to the bed. "Could you at least turn around?" I turn to see a blushing Duff.

"O-Oh, yeah, right," He says rather flustered. He turns around, his head bent down.

I giggle, then change as fast as I can. "Alright, I'm done."

Duff turns around, a smile on his face. "Okay, well, I'll be on the couch if you need me."

"What? No," I say. "This is your bed. I can sleep on the couch."

Duff rubs his eyes. "I'm too tired too argue. Can we just share the bed? If that's okay with you?"

I nod, already climbing under the covers. I turn to face the wall. I feel the bed dip beside me as Duff gets in.

"Goodnight, Henley," He says almost in a whisper.

"Night Duff."

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Duff: @daisystuffsstuff

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nervousenemychild · 4 years

Text

hi I'm trying this for the first time ever. posting what I've written online for other people to see.

“James,” she said, entering the kitchen where he was organizing the glassware in cabinets too high for her to reach. She was surprised to find he was adequately following her instructions as to how she preferred them organized. “Please don’t be angry with me when I say this.”

He immediately put down the tea cup in his hand and turned around to face her. “Sure.” He of course was wearing his signature goofy grin.

She shook her head and smiled. “You don’t even know what it is yet.”

“Well, you’re you, so…” He trailed. “What could you have possibly done? Lily Evans, known horrible person.” He rolled his eyes in reply, still smiling.

She decided not to respond to his sarcastic remark and instead just break the news. “I think I may have misplaced the golden snitch from your Seventh Year Cup in the move,” she said, her eyebrows furrowing.

His face fell and she cringed. “I’m really sorry.”

He shook his head and walked past her out of the kitchen.

“James—“

“No, Lily. That was irreplaceable. What do you mean, you misplaced it? Where do you think it is?” he asked, irritation evident in his tone.

“I don’t know, James. That’s what I mean,” she replied. “I thought… When I packed up our bedroom, I could’ve sworn I put everything in our dressers in different boxes, knickknacks included. All of my journals are with my clothes, so—“

“Oh, so I guess all of your stuff is neatly squared away!” he exclaimed, swirling around then to face her. His face was beet red.

“I didn’t mean to—“

“But you obviously were careless about it. Shit, Lily, what is wrong with you?” he snapped.

She folded her arms. “What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with me that I packed up our entire bedroom last minute last night while you ran around and started schoolchild brawls with the same stupid people?”

“Better than misplacing something of extreme personal and historical value.” He sat down on the couch. “And better yet, I was protecting you.”

“Let’s you and I make a distinction between protecting me and being an idiot, once and for all,” she retaliated, “for the umpteenth time. If someone comes up to me and begins threatening me or shoving me or stabbing or kicking or—“

“You misplaced the one thing that used to make me fucking happy!” he screamed.

Tears came to her eyes as they stared at each other in silence. “The one thing that used to make you happy?” she asked him finally. “Quidditch. Quidditch is the one thing that used to make you happy?”

James pursed his lips and folded his arms.

“You’re a literal child!” she exclaimed. “Such a fucking baby, you are. Get over it, James. It’s a stupid ball!”

“A stupid ball. A stupid ball?” he asked. “Of course you didn’t pack it, Lily. You clearly don’t care about something that means a lot to me.”

“Well, you clearly don’t care about me because I don’t make you happy,” she choked back a sob before she fled the room.

At around ten o’clock at night, she retreated into the living room and threw the snitch at the couch. “There. Now you can think back on all the times you were happy with this hunk of metal.”

“Lily—“

“No. I don’t want to hear you. I’ve been looking for that stupid thing for hours and you haven’t said a word to me,” she said as she made her way back into their bedroom.

He followed her to find the room completely unpacked.

“I was unpacking the kitchen. I’m finished,” he explained.

“Well, that’s two rooms done,” she said resignedly, sitting on the bed.

“I’m sorry,” he said finally.

“You’re not sorry,” she replied. “You were so eager to yell at me. Why did you flip the switch like that?” she asked.

“Honestly…” he began, “I’ve just been really angry all day and I had no right to lose it like that.” He joined her on foot of the bed, and they both looked down at their new bedroom carpet. “You do make me happy, you know,” he said, his voice small. “You know that.”

“I guess,” she answered.

“You guess?”

“I don’t know, James. You screamed at me today,” she recalled, beginning to really be harsh towards him. “Over something of extreme personal and historical value,” she mocked, her voice adopting a childish pitch. “Something. Not someone. I said I was sorry, and I’d never lose it on—“

“I know you wouldn’t. Look at me,” he commanded.

She sighed and glanced over at him. “What?”

“I can’t believe I have to say this. You are way more important to me than anything, anyone even. Especially a snitch. Okay?” he asked.

They stared at each other in silence again before Lily broke it.

“Are you happy?” she whispered.

He wrapped his arms around her and broke out in tears. He sobbed into her shoulder for a moment before pulling away to find her face stained in tears too.

“It’s not that I’m unhappy, Lily… It’s just… All day, I’ve been thinking about how we had to move to live somewhere that I’m only somewhat confident is an area where you won’t be murdered for being who you are,” he said then. “And I can’t help it. I start thinking about how mad I am, and sometimes the only way to calm myself down is to think about our times at Hogwarts. And I know you weren’t even completely safe back there which is why when Sirius and I saw those creeps at the bar last night… Lily, I can’t see their faces without thinking about the threats they’ve made about you, how they look at you, how—“

“Okay, James. We’re away from it now. I don’t like it either, but it doesn’t mean I—“

“Sirius talked me out of it until they started bugging me, saying they knew we were moving and they were tracking us, and they…. Lily, what they said they were going to do to you,” he bawled then. “I can’t just stand by and let that happen. I physically cannot. You’ve asked me to I don’t know how many times, and if I could, I would. I promise.”

She kissed him on the cheek. “Calm down. You know they only do it to get a rise—“

“Really, Lily? Really? When we both know I’ve worked on cases where those threats happened to real Muggleborn women,” he said. “I understand it’s easier and probably healthier for you to just not take them seriously, but I won’t ever let my guard down around those scumbags. I hate them. Do you know how many cases they’ve been suspects in, how many times they’ve been taken into custody and released?” he asked.

“I know, James. I know. You’ve told me all about it,” she said, resting her hands on his shoulders then. “Calm down. It’s okay. I’m right here. I’m not hurt.”

“And I’m never, ever going to let you get hurt,” he cried, embracing her again. His sobs shook his entire body.

“Okay. Okay,” she told him. “Calm down. We’re right here together. Nothing is going to happen to us. We’ve got the place all secured, and it’s way out in the middle of nowhere. You made it that way, remember? This was finally the place you agreed to,” she reminded him. “It’s all right. This is the safest space for us to be.”

He kissed her hair. “I’m so sorry, Lily. It shouldn’t be you comforting me. You’re the one in danger, the one I treated terribly today—“

“I can tell that you were on the verge of a panic attack now,” she said softly. “You have been all day, haven’t you?”

“I’m sorry,” he gasped out. “Fuck. I’m sorry, Lily—“

“No, James. It’s okay. Just cry. It’s fine. We can talk afterwards,” she assured him.

He shook his head. “I can’t believe I yelled at you like that today.”

“I know. I was confused, too. Just cry it out,” she encouraged him, and finally, he lowered his head back onto her shoulder and cried a little more before stopping. “Okay?” she asked.

He nodded.

“Okay,” she said. She pulled away from him and kissed his forehead.

“I’m sorry, Lily,” he said then. “Really sorry. I should have never gotten that upset with you over something like that. You found it anyways, and if I was that concerned about it, I could have packed it myself,” he told her. “You make me so happy, which is why I love you so much and I never should have lost my temper with you.”

She nodded. “I understand. It’s okay.”

He kissed her on the lips. “I guess I just… In the moment you told me, I immediately thought about how if it was left in the old house, I didn’t want us to go back and look for it because it’d be unsafe. You know, with me starting a new sector at work, and being so far away form the city out here… It is kind of like starting all over. I don’t want to leave the old us behind… The us that took laps around the castle, studied in bed together, when you’d come and cheer me on at my Quidditch matches… That’s one of my favorite memories of us together, when you’d support me and scream your little head off for me. The snitch reminds me of all of those times we had back in the castle. It… It kinda sucks we have to leave everything behind in order to keep you safe. It’s ridiculous, it’s scary,” he said.

“I know,” she told him. “It’s like, all our friends think we’ll still be around, but… I don’t know. London has proved to be pretty dangerous, and now that it’s so far away… We’re just going to have to see if they want to make the trip.”

He nodded. “We have each other, though. And you make me so happy, and you have for a very long time now. I love you so much.”

She smiled. “I love you, too. You make me happy.”

He grabbed her hand and brought it to his mouth to kiss it. “I’m sorry, really.”

“It’s okay, James. It honestly startled me more than anything,” she told him. “I love you, James. I know you’d never… You’d never really treat me like that.”

He kissed her cheek. “I never would want to. I’m supposed to be someone you can trust. Come sit with me.”

She rolled her eyes. “James, it’s—“

“Come here.” He held open his arms and straightened out his legs.

“I’ve gained weight since we left Hogwarts, you kn—“

“Come here to me.”

She sighed and crawled over to sit on his lap.

“There, there. It’s all right. I’m right here.” He wrapped his arms around her and began to gently rock her side to side.

“I’m not a child,” she protested, but her voice was too soft for him to take her seriously.

“You quite enjoy this. Don’t lie,” he said back, smoothing her hair and kissing it. “There, there, Lily.”

She rested her cheek on his shoulder and shut her eyes. “I am tired.”

“Of course you are, spending all day unpacking and whatnot. Let me soothe you to sleep,” he said.

She looked up at him for a moment.

“What?” he asked her.

“Nothing,” she replied. “Nothing. Go on.”

He rocked her a little longer before he moved her up the bed to tuck her in beneath the covers.

“Undress me first,” she commanded.

“Lily—“

“What? I’m going to fall asleep with my day clothes on?”

“Your jumper and sweatpants?” he asked, quirking an eyebrow.

“Take my clothes off,” she restated.

He nodded and did just that, pulling her jumper over her head and then shimmying her pants off her. “Better?”

She nodded, grinning. “Much.”

He kissed her and moved the comforter overtop her. “There. Let me climb in next to you.” He positioned himself to spoon her, but she almost immediately flipped over to face him.

“You are going to be such an excellent father,” she told him.

“I am?” he asked.

She nodded. “Someday. Right?”

“Right.” He kissed her forehead. “Someday soon if you aren’t careful.”

She smiled at his honestly lame flirtation. It was strange yet pleasant how she became giddier and easier to impress the longer they stayed together. “Yeah.” She nestled her head under his chin before saying what she wanted to next. “How soon do you think we should think about it?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know, Lily. We have the see what’ll happen with the war. How safe we are in this house should play a big factor, too.”

She yawned. “You’re right. I just… I guess I’m somewhat eager. We have been married for almost a year now,” she said.

“Secretly married,” he contradicted.

She rolled her eyes and emerged from under his chin, kissing him on the lips. “Same difference. James, the reason we got married is because we wanted to be together forever as soon as possible if this war was going to rage on and keep us from doing that. Isn’t it just the same with a baby?” she asked. “I want to be a mother. I’ve wanted to be a mother since I can remember.”

He shook his head. “Not at all. I’m not bringing a child… our child… into an unsafe situation,” he explained.

“Nothing’s going to happen,” she told him. “Really. I wouldn’t… I wouldn’t want that either, you know that.” She grabbed his hand. “A baby would be great for us right now. Don’t you want something else to think about other than violence and hatred?”

“Sure. I’d love that. That’s not what a baby’s for,” he replied. “I really don’t need to speak any more on it, Lily. Give it awhile. I’m not getting you pregnant until I’m supremely satisfied that we are safe.” He brought the hand he was holding to his mouth to kiss it. “Okay?”

She nodded. “Okay. I understand.”

“Goodnight, Lily. I love you so much, and… and I really do hope that one day we can have a baby for you, for me, for the sake of having a family. I just want that baby to have a long, healthy life alongside us both.”

“Of course,” she replied. “Right. I love you, too, James, so much. Too much, I think, sometimes.”

He smiled. “Never too much for me. Goodnight, okay?”

“Goodnight.”

He shut his eyes and she immediately snuggled closer to him, her chest pressed against where he held her hand at his heart.

#jily fic #jily #hp #hp fanfic #harrypotter

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artificialqueens · 5 years

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Elastic Heart - Part 5/10 (Branjie) - Mia Ugly

A/N: The rest of this story is basically mostly written and I'm going to try to post it quickly before the ACTUAL SHOW messes with my Valentina-esque levels of fantasy. Thanks to everyone who has been reading and giving me feedback. I’ve never written in this fandom before and you’re all so kind (and talented, Jesus murphy.)

Relationships for Brock have always been complicated.

He really hasn’t met a whole lot of queer people who don’t have some kind of emotional hang-up based as a result of the world they live in. And his journey’s been easier than a lot of other people’s, so really, he should be over this by now. But he still has a helpless association between want and guilt, like the moment he feels something good it’s a ticking clock until it’s going to be taken away.

His most long-term relationship has been with ballet, and then he cheated on it with drag. He can’t imagine loving anything more than that. The thought makes him feel a bit sick to his stomach, because - that kind of love would be overwhelming. As big as the world. Completely uncontrollable, and Brock has to be in control.

But when he watches himself on Drag Race, there are moments up there when he sees someone who - isn’t. In total control, that is. Sure, he presents a very polished, curated image but sometimes he does this smile thing when he’s asked about Vanjie and it’s - just not a face he’s ever seen himself making. He knows what his face looks like. When did it start looking like that?

He goes out after the Snatch Game watch-party with a couple of other queens, ones he barely knows (but he’s trying to be unreasonably social, trying to stay distracted.) He can barely look at the screen as he epically bombs a Canadian legend, so he drinks too quickly, and talks to the bartender, and pretends to be live-tweeting when isn’t. There’s a guy there too (Jeff? James?) leaning close to Brock, touching him too much, buying him drinks he doesn’t want. Brock accepts them anyway, wanting to feel anything but his feelings.

His friends suggest another bar, and he follows them, and Jeff or James is comes too. There are vodka shots (he thinks) and Vanessa’s beautiful face on yet another screen and more shots and Jeff/James’ arm around Brock’s shoulders.

And Brock doesn’t want his arm there. But he laughs and smiles and reprises his war-crime of a French Canadian accent, because that’s easier. Easier than remembering that episode, those feelings. The sight of Vanjie, silver sequins across the mainstage, lips parting. the thought of: “this is it, they’re in the bottom two, it’s over.”

It wasn’t over then, of course. It is now.

Brock thinks he gets Jeff/James number although he can’t remember asking for it. Do they kiss? He hopes they don’t.

Somehow Brock is in an alley, leaning against a brick wall because he doesn’t think he can stand.

Somehow Brock is in his bed, and there are cats on his pillow.

Somehow Brock is on his phone, FaceTiming someone. Who is he FaceTiming oh dear GOD don’t be -

It’s too late, there’s no going back, and Yvie Oddly’s furious eyes are glaring at him. No, his name is Jovan. They’re here in the real world, they’re not on the show (Brock sometimes has to remind himself of that.)

“Oh.” Jovan says that one syllable like an obscenity, rubbing his hands over his face. Brock can barely make him out in the darkness. “I see you’re handling things well.”

Jovan’s in bed somewhere, still wrapped up in blankets.

“Whosit?” a quiet voice slurs somewhere beside him, a tumble of long dark hair against a white pillowcase. Jovan frowns and murmurs something indistinguishable, picking the phone up and taking it somewhere brighter.

Brock regrets everything, all of it. “Sorry - I shouldn’t have called.”

“There are lots of things you shouldn’t have done. I don’t know if calling me at 3 am makes the top five.”

(Top Five Things Brock Shouldn’t Have Done:

Number One, and fine, Number Two as well: Fallen stupidly, clumsily, unspeakably in love on national goddamn television. On a reality show, for Christ’s sake, like he’s a contestant on the Bachelorette, like he’s the kind of person who would confuse a paying gig with something real. Looked across a set full of cameras and lights and P.A.s and thought ‘holy shit, that’s Miss Vanjie,’ and then - not even one day later - thought ‘holy shit. I’m in so much trouble.’

Number Three: Started smoking. That stuff will kill you, and it’s so fucking hard to quit. He’s tried seven times, and the longest he ever managed it was six months, but he was touring and he was gaining weight and his body-issues were out of control at the time, so. Yeah. Don’t ever start, is what he’s saying.

Number Four: That Celine Dion, Jesus Lord, it was just hideous. The memory still wakes him in the night in a cold sweat.

Number Five: Thrown Ru-Paul’s fucking Drag Race.)

“I’m drunk.” The bedroom is spinning. The cats are in danger.

“Yeah, you are. Girl, what is going on with you?”

“I just - I know we can’t talk about it. But I wanted -”

In the dull light of a kitchen, Jovan raises an exhausted eyebrow - or at least the place where an eyebrow would be if he had one.

“I wanted to talk to someone who was there.” (Because Nina wasn’t there. And Plastique wasn’t there. And sometimes the weight of what happened seems unbearable on Brock’s shoulders. And sometimes he wonders if he even remembers it right. Sometimes he thinks that when the episode airs it’s going to be a completely different picture than the one he painted in his memory. Uglier. Bright and graceless and cheap.)

Jovan lets out a long, deep sigh. Brock can faintly hear a clock ticking in the background.

“Okay. Fine. I was there. But you know who else was?”

“Yvie -”

“Your fucking boyfriend. Remember that? So maybe there’s someone else you should be drunk-dialing at ass-crack-o’clock in the morning.” Jovan’s volume is starting to build, but he brings it down, casting a nervous look over his shoulder. “Listen, Brooke, you made a choice. Okay? You can’t go back, and you can’t beat yourself up for the rest of your life. There’s got to be a point where you move the fuck on.”

“I know.” This is why Brock called, must be what his vodka-soaked brain was thinking. Jovan can be mean and he can be abrasive but he’s never anything other than honest.

“And like, I’m pretty sure she’s fucking other people. Someone was posting about it. So.” (Okay, maybe a bit too honest Jesus fucking hell -)

Brock’s face must do something in response to that statement, because Jovan suddenly looks - sad. Ugh, that’s even worse than furious.

“Does she know?” Jovan asks before Brock can say anything.

“Know what?”

“Fuck off, ‘know what.’ Have you told her you’re in love with her?”

(“You want a ring or some shit?”)

Brock doesn’t answer.

Because - he hasn’t told Jose, not in those words. Not - out loud.

Jovan nods sharply. “And there it fucking is. Why do I have to have this conversation with you if you can’t cowgirl up enough to get your man back? I know this timid Canadian bullshit was good for the fans, they fucking ate it up, but this is real life now, girl. You can’t blame a bad edit.”

“Didn’t you just tell me to move the fuck on?”

“Well bitch, now you have two options. Maybe pick one. At least you’d be doing something.”

After Jovan says goodbye (well, flips him off and hangs up) Brock is still too tipsy for his own good. So he does another stupid stupid thing. He goes online.

There’s this picture floating around of the two of them. He remembers the P.A. taking it in the back seat of the van, promising them he’d send it to their managers (“Omg, you’re so cute right now.”) Brock looks at it for a long time, and there is sand and saltwater under his fingernails.

Is this what a heart attack feels like? Maybe he’s having a heart attack.

Maybe he should try to quit smoking again.

Maybe he should listen to Yvie.

(Move the fuck on. She’s fucking other people.)

Relationships for Brock are complicated. It’s only ever been simple once.

* * *

There’s a heatwave in L.A. and production takes them to a beach.

The whole area is guarded by P.A.’s on walkies, but its the queens’ day off, and there are no cameras for once. Everyone loses their shit after Brooke emerges from the changerooms with a wide-brimmed hat and long linen shirt over her swimsuit; for all that she’s accused of being thirsty AF, she’s still a pasty white chick who’ll burn in under thirty minutes. Vanjie laughs so loud and long when she sees her that it’s almost worth it (“yass girl, live that Diane Keaton fantasy.”)

When they get to the water, Vanjie is quick to ditch her clothes in favour of the tiniest black speedo, and a thin gold chain. She looks like a picture Brooke might have hidden under the mattress as a teenager, and Vanjie knows it. She grins at Brooke as she rubs some sort of oil on her (perfect, gorgeous) skin, and Brooke thinks she must have gotten too much sun already, might faint or dissolve with the weight of this wanting.

“Eyes up here, bitch,” Vanessa smirks at her as she walks past, heading toward the shoreline. Brooke watches her go, can’t help herself. After that precious five minutes in Brooke’s hotel room, every second around Vanjie seems electric. Brooke keeps having these terrible, delicious thoughts of pushing her up against every hard surface she sees; the stations in the werkroom, the side of the van, the runway. The way Vanjie’s body was warm and trembling, the way her eyes were blown black, the harsh rasp of her voice - fuck.

Brooke shouldn’t be thinking of this while wearing a swimsuit, she’s going to get arrested.

She lathers on the sunblock and keeps the hat (but undoes her shirt, so that’s something. She might regret it later when she’s lobster red, but she’s beginning to feel a bit like the girls’ spinster aunt chaperone.)

Yvie, seemingly oblivious to the heat, remains in long black jeans and a ripped up sweatshirt. She hangs back under a beach umbrella, nose stuck in a copy of Blood and Guts in High School while the other girls frolic in the surf like puppies or nymphs or something. Brooke sits with her for a bit, watches A’Keria and Silky and Vanjie hassle each other, laughing and swearing as they try to push Silky underwater.

Brooke isn’t sure what expression is on her face as she studies Vanessa from a distance, but it can’t be dignified. She twines her hands together, smiles down at her knees before anyone calls her out for it.

Of course, she’s too late. When she glances back up, Yvie is looking at her over the top of her tiny round sunglasses. She does not look impressed.

“You know what you’re doing?”

Brooke doesn’t bother pretending to be confused. She’s been asking herself the same question a lot lately. Too often to not be a bit of a red flag. A pink flag at least.

“We’re just flirting. It’s fun, we’re not –“

“Yeah, but like maybe drop the bullshit for ten seconds and remember that this is a competition. You know they’re going to make you lip-sync, right?”

Brooke’s mind goes conspicuously blank for a moment. She forces herself to take a breath, do a grounding exercise. Obviously it’s a thought she’s had before. She knows it would be a gag, knows it would be good television. But it’s also something Brooke has to avoid thinking about, move her thoughts in pirouettes and backbends around the idea, because she doesn’t know how else to survive. She can’t - she can’t be the one who sends Vanjie home. It just can’t happen.

“We’ll have to stay out of the bottom then.”

“Girl, they won’t care, they’ll fucking put you in the bottom to get that storyline. That’s the tea. Can you handle it? Because you’ve got little hearts floating around your head right now –“

“Fuck off –“

“-and I don’t think it’s an act. I think you’re trying to be cool about it, but you’re not being cool at all. The pair of you are being absolutely the least cool.”

Brooke rolls her eyes. Yvie’s been pissy since Scarlet left, but she doesn’t need to come at Brooke when they’re at the beach for Christ’s sakes.

“You know she’s not making it to the Top 4. With that runway -”

“Fuck off.” Brooke snaps her head toward Yvie, immediately done with this conversation. Yvie can say what she wants about Brooke, but no one gets to talk shit about Vanessa. “Seriously.”

“I’m just saying, you ready for that?”

“And I’m just saying it’s our day off. So maybe leave it for a goddamn minute.”

“Whatever.” Yvie gets up out of the sand, brushes off her jeans, and walks off down the beach, little black stormclouds following her. Brooke decides that the least she can do is steal the queen’s umbrella, shuffling her towel over into the shade and stretching out.

Fuck Yvie. She doesn’t know what’s going to happen. She doesn’t know anything about it.

Brooke dozes in the shade for a bit, enjoying the warmth of the sand and the occasional bark of Vanjie’s wicked laugh. She doesn’t know how long she lies there, only really waking up when a very cold, very damp toe drags over her bare calf.

“Poor sleepy Brooke. Just ain’t cut out for the pressure of television, hey?”

Brooke smiles before she opens her opens her eyes, squinting up at Vanjie in the sunlight.

“You need to pull a Dela, send your fine self home?”

“You wish,” Brooke smiles as Vanjie settles down beside her in the sand. Water droplets still cling to her shoulders, chest, stomach. Brooke feels her lips parting, thirsty as hell.

“That’s a damn lie, girl, don’t know what I’d do if you went home now. Be boring as hell around here. You know, cuz you got so much personality.”

“I leave the personality to you, you leave the challenge winning to me,” Brooke says deadpan, and Vanjie hoots with laughter.

“Oooh ,bitch! You may look pretty but you don’t act pretty.”

Nina and Plastique have gone to track down some food, and the rest of the girls are still down by the water, so it’s just Brooke and Vanjie under the umbrella together, lying side by side. Vanjie leans up onto her elbow, giving Brooke a once-over before raising her eyebrows.

“You undone a couple buttons, hey, Miss Brooke? Tryin’ to drive the boys crazy?”

“Only one of them.”

Vanjie gets that crease between her eyebrows again, that little nervous tell. It’s gone just as quickly, and Vanjie looks away.

“Sure, sure.” But there’s a flush to her cheekbones, the kind of blush that makes Brooke feel like she’s never been kissed before, or heard Tchaikovsky, or seen the Pacific Ocean.

Sometimes Vanjie does things that make Brooke feel like a sun that is rising. Completely new and so bright she’s blinding.

“Bet you say that to all the girls.” Vanjie stretches out on her back, staring straight up. “Top 8, Top 8, Top 8.”

“Top 4, Top 4, Top 4,” Brooke says back to her, and Vanjie laughs.

“Girl, I gotta take it one challenge at a time, right? I ain’t gonna think that far in the future.”

“What would you be doing today if you weren’t here? If you were just at home?”

“Hmm.” Vanjie thinks about it. Brooke watches her distractedly tug on the thin gold chain she’s wearing. “Same sorta thing, maybe. Hit up the beach, find some piece of trade. You know - what I’m doing now.”

“So this is just any other day for you.”

“Oh yeah. Definitely. Gettin’ bored up in here.” Vanjie grins at her. “What ‘bout you, girl? You be at the library or something?”

“Sure. Studying. Playing bridge. Drinking tea if things got really crazy.”

“I knew you was nasty.” Vanjie studies her, reaches out one hand. “One day and you already gettin’ scruffy.”

Her fingers trace Brooke’s upper lip, and Brooke can’t be held responsible for her actions; she opens her mouth and sucks Vanjie’s fingers inside, twisting her tongue around them. They taste like the ocean.

Vanessa’s eyes go dark and unfocused, and her breathing stutters. “Careful, girl.”

She slides her fingers out of Brooke’s mouth and sucks them into her own. Brooke wants to roll over on top of her and kiss her and grind against her, right here in the sand in front of everyone. She wants Vanjie’s nipples in her mouth, hipbones between her teeth. The want is something she’s never felt before, clean and simple and deadly as a knife. It shakes her knees, rattles her jaw.

Of course, she won’t do it. Vanjie might be known as this loud, dynamic, fearless queen, but when it comes to – whatever’s going on between them – she’s just as private as Brooke is. Maybe more so. Brooke was ready to spill the tea in the backstage lounge after being called out that first time, whereas Vanjie just laughed and disappeared. Brooke was talking about crushes while Vanjie was calling them friends.

She’s shy. Brooke’s realizing that more and more, and it blows her mind. Who would have thought that Miss Vanjie would be shy?

Most of the time it’s Brooke that makes the first move in the werkroom, and God help her she was never this touch-starved before - what the fuck is happening? She’s never had to clench her hands into fists instead of reaching out, she’s never felt electrified by something as simple as a raised eyebrow. She’s clearly out of her depths here, and she blames it on the structure of the show – the pressure of performing and being judged, the long days and almost sleepless nights (she’s dreaming in choreography now, wakes up en pointe.)

“You’re killin’ me,” Vanjie murmurs, staring at Brooke like she can’t help herself. Brooke flattens her hand against Vanjie’s smooth chest, and Vanjie lets out a tight, slow exhale. Brooke can feel Vanjie’s heartbeat leaping against her palm, and wonders how the hell she’s going to survive this.

The van ride back to the hotel is some kind of torture. A P.A. takes a picture of them in the backseat (“OMG you’re so cute right now.”) and then Vanjie takes Brooke’s hand and doesn’t let go. The two of them are pressed close together, shoulder to hip, and Vanjie smells of coconut oil and saltwater. It’s like sitting next to a mermaid. Brooke thinks she might be drowning.

At one point Vanjie dozes off, and her head tips toward Brooke. Almost resting on her shoulder but not quite. Enough that she can feel Vanessa’s breath each time she exhales. It’s making her feel dizzy, stomach tight with (well, want, that’s obvious) but also something else. Something sharper, like a needle full of ink. Something that feels permanent.

Vanjie’s hand is warm in Brooke’s, pulse slow and steady as music. Brooke does not let it go.

When the van is pulling into the hotel parkade, they’re jostled slightly. Vanessa grumbles, sighs and starts to pull away. Brooke turns toward her just as Vanjie wakes up and for a moment they simply – look at each other. Vanjie’s head almost on Brooke’s shoulder, Vanjie’s dark eyes blinking sleepily at Brooke. Their lips only inches apart, and the smell of salt in the air between them.

Vanjie’s forehead creases. Brooke would press her lips to that spot, if she wasn’t terrified the other queen would flinch away.

“Hey,” Vanjie says softly, their eyes holding. Something gives a lurch in Brooke’s chest, like a muscle being torn.

“Hey,” she says, but the word feels like something else.

“Out the car, bitches,” Silky shouts at them as the van door opens. As Brooke reluctantly pulls away, stumbles out of the back, she sees Yvie shaking her head, over it completely.

As they stand in the parking lot, waiting for the other girls to gather up their things, Vanjie reaches over and takes Brooke’s hand again. Their fingers lace together. Brooke has trouble remembering to breathe.

They hold hands all the way to the elevator, quiet. Brooke can’t shake the constant awareness of each move Vanessa makes, every time their arms rub together, the sudden pressure of Vanessa’s hip against hers as they squish into the elevator with the other queens and the remaining P.A.s. When they get to Vanessa’s floor, it’s all Brooke can do not to follow her out, hold hands down the hallway and press her up against the door of her room, get down on her knees and do anything, everything (get Vee off once with her mouth, and then take her to bed and eat her out until she’s begging to be fucked, and then -)

“Bye ladies,” Vanjie says as she exits the crowded elevator, followed by her P.A. A flicker of something crosses her face and she suddenly turns back around. “Oh shit, I forgot - hold the door.”

A P.A. stops the door from closing and Vanjie pushes her way back inside until she can grab Brooke and pull her down into a deep kiss, sloppy with tongue, noisy and wet and intoxicating. Brooke squeezes her eyes shut as the elevator erupts in cheering and whistling, puts her hands around Vanjie’s waist and holds her tight. If this is all they can have right now, Brooke is going to take advantage.

Much too soon, Vanjie drags herself away, lips swollen and shiny.

“Y’had something on your face, Hytes,” she says as she leaves again, and A’Keria wags her finger while Silky hollers.

Vanjie catches Brooke’s eye as the elevator doors start to close, and Brooke wants to rip her heart out of her chest and hand it over. Vanjie should have it, and she can do whatever the fuck she wants with it, Brooke doesn’t care. It’s not Brooke’s heart anymore. It stopped belonging to her a couple days ago.

Instead she smiles at Vanjie, struck dumb with affection, and Vanjie smiles back. The doors close and Brooke goes back to her room. She doesn’t turn on the lights on, doesn’t need to. She feels incandescent, shining bright enough to be seen from space.

And then the next day Snatch Game happens, and everything goes to hell.

#rpdr fanfiction #brooke lynn hytes #vanessa vanjie mateo #yvie oddly #branjie #angst #smut #canon compliant #elastic heart #mia ugly #tw binge drinking #tw anxiety #concrit welcome #submission #s11 #on set fic

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blissuniverse · 6 years

Text

I'm always watching you.

CHAPTER II

Sasuke cuts himself and hides it very well under his wrist protectors. However, a suspecting gaze from Sakura tells him otherwise.

Rating: T+ but I think i’ll add some dark scenes later.

Genre: Hurt/Comfort and Romance

I’m not sure if this will turn out as a three-shot but we’ll see.

A.N. English is not my native language and I am only new to writing. plus, I am not a medical expert so some parts maybe odd and not right even though I did some valid research. uwu annd lastly I didn’t have time to edit., so this is just a draft. lol

FF.net

Chapter I

“Shit. I can’t train like this.” Sasuke hissed in a frustrated groan as he tried to throw kunais and shurikens from a ranged target.

His wrists were being annoying and it burned like hell.

As he made every movement the wounds from his wrists would distract him. And just as he hissed a curse, the wounds from last night’s torture began to bleed again.

“Tch, another waste of time, I have no other choice.” he set off to the road of the hospital carefully clutching and hiding the secret infliction he had done in secret.

It was his entire fault really. Being lost in his own mind and being so easily controlled by his emotions that one thing he never thought of losing to. It’s a thing that disgusted him, it was a form of weakness. If nothing more, Naruto’s words only fit him right. “You’re a freak!” everyone would think that. But he never dwelled on the matter anyway.

As he strode his way to the hospital, He’d come to appreciate the silence he was met with

The good thing about walking past the streets at this time was that there were only few people beginning to start off their day. So, the trip to the hospital was quite efficient for him.

It was quiet, very and nobody gave him any attention.

And not for long the building of the hospital came into view

As he entered the hospital the first thing that any living people who entered was to ask the information desk. “Oh! Uchiha-san! Good morning! Is there any help I could get you?” The brunette girl with the nurse outfit said. A name tag dangled on the left part of her uniform that says ‘Ami’

“I need a physician.” He grunted. “Oh! I would be guessing those are wounds?” Ami said and Sasuke nodded at this. “He’s a walk-in doctor is that okay with you Uchiha-san?” Ami asked waiting for a preferral. Well they were Uchihas and they don’t seem to trust just anybody with something.

“Hn, anyone available would be fine.”

“Alright, Dr. Hiro-san is available at this hour. You should seek him at his office it’s near the emergency area.”

“Aa.” Sasuke said and walked off.

The walk wasn’t that long and that he made it within a spare of minutes.

The doctor was easy to communicate with. And it was just his luck as he stood there already on the operating room.

“So, Sasuke-san, what happened?” Hiro asked with a bright personality. “My wrists are bleeding.” Sasuke said and started removing his bloodied wrist protectors.

As he scribbled on the medical chart. Which was probably his. ‘fuck, my records are piling up.’

“Hmm…. I see, you seem to have previous ones like these as well.” As he scanned the medical chart. And dotting out his pen once more.

“Is there any reason why your wounds keep appearing like this?” Hiro asked Sasuke. ‘the bastard’s testing me.’ Sasuke thought.

He rolled his eyes and said. “They were bruises I acquired in training.” The doctor didn’t look convinced as he gasped at the wounds. Sasuke gave the doctor a final look that meant not to dwell on it any further. The doctor gave a defeated sigh and said.

“Well… It’s been cleaned thoroughly. But these are big cuts Sasuke-san. I think some might even need stitching.”

The sight of Sasuke’s hand unravelled as the doctor completely removed the bandage from his wrists. It almost made Sasuke’s stomach shudder. ‘I am a fool.’

“Alright, I’ll clean these up with some aqua oxigenada after I administer you with some shots and start stitching.” “did you drink some antibiotics this early morning?” The doctor asked as he assisted him to sit on the medical bed.

“Yes.” He answered shortly.

“What time?” As the doctor prepared and sanitized the needed medical tools and readied the syringes for the needed shots.

“4 AM.” Sasuke answered.

“What milligram?” the doctor asked as he flicked the syringe with his fingers. And measuring the right amount of vial.

“Hn.” Sasuke answered. The brunette doctor smiled and chuckled as he scratched the back of his neck. “I guess that says you don’t know.” He scribbled some things on the medical chart after washing his own hands and wearing some latex gloves.

“I’ll administer you with a small injection of anti-biotic just in case you drank a very weak one, And… of course some anaesthesia.”

Right before the first injection. The door gave out a loud thud. This startled Sasuke whom also looked at that direction,

he sensed a familiar chakra. His glaring towards the door only made him glare.

The doctor came up and peeped at the door but found no one to be there.

“Hmm… someone musta’ve bumped it accidentally. The emergency room is quite hectic today.” And then he shrugged it off and approached a very troubled looking Sasuke.

‘Tch! I have to be alert at all cost, someone is already spying on me.’

Under no conditions should people see him in this state, especially his teammates. He would never allow it. He could only die from humiliation, disgust, and self-deprivation. It would only hinder him from trying to get away from these selfish actions.

His mind is twisted he admits, and not any of this should be normal. Even though he’d said it in a million times.

He knew that he never deserved to do this to himself. So that’s why his resort to life is to avenge his entire clan. Because he never deserved to lose a family, and they never deserved to die. So, until he was alive. He strives to hate and become much stronger than his brother. Then, after all of that, he wished the sufferings his mind gave him would disappear. Because if he killed his brother, then so are his nightmares.

“There, all done! Please don’t do any strenuous activities for a week. It would reopen the wound. And just like I said, The hospital is quite hectic today. You can’t just grasp any medic nin here. They’re very limited people. And they are needed in a very serious case.”

Sasuke grunted at this and muttered his ‘thanks’ to the doctor.

He left the operation room and walked to the hallways knowingly going in the wrong direction as he sensed a familiar chakra. ‘Tch, I think I have an idea who it was outside the operation room I occupied just minutes ago.’

“SASUKE-KUUUUN!” an annoying screech was heard after that he felt someone latched tightly on his arm.

“Get off me Ino.” He said annoyingly while struggling to save his wrist from any contact. He pulled her off his body frustatingly. And the girl was literally reluctant.

“Awww… common you’re no fun Sasuke-Kun! I was just gonna give you the biggest kiss when I felt your chakra earli-”

“Get off my face Ino.” Sasuke cut her off. He looked irritated and ready to snap. “wha- what? Why?” Ino exclaimed.

“Didn’t you hear me? I said leave me alone!” Sasuke said with finality. She just had to be so clingy at this hour. It’s too early for all of this mess.

“And, don’t ever follow me!” he said in seriousness. Ino gasped at this and rolled her eyes annoyingly.

“Really Sasuke-kun, you should be upgrading your social skill more!” She said in a girlish manner which made him want to flinch more. If he didn’t learn all of those etiquette lessons from his mother about respecting women she would have been beaten into a pulp already. She had no right to spy on his privacy.

Finally facing him casually. “It seems today is not the day I changed that about you. But I’ll never lose to that forehead.” She said as she flipped her hair. Why do they keep going on about this? It just sounded like foul play. It was so annoying.

“Anyways! It was nice seeing you! Good bye Sasuke-kuuun!” She waved off flauntingly despite him being a rude prick.

‘Tch! She was the one who spied on me. I’d be in a real big trouble if she used that mind transfers of hers.’ He grunted at this and finally walked on the right direction.

Unfortunately not only for a few steps away from the scene did he felt a much more familiar chakra. It felt strong emotions, one that he might feel of confidence and oddly firing determination, it was of rare occurrences for him to feel her this way. After all, he never really did try to get to know her any better than Naruto and Kakashi.

The sight she saw of her. Short pink hair, resolute green eyes and a hint of smile that displayed self-pride as she hastily strode faster and frankly trying to avoid a room she just passed. She was clutching a thick book that seemed to weigh ¼ of her body. How can she manage to bring that all the way around in the hospital?

Just after a few seconds she crashed onto him and like he expected. As she was about to fall, he already caught her steadying and holding firmly on her shoulders.

“tch, you should be more careful.” He said in his usual tone.

“Oh, Sasuke-kun! I’m sorry I was in a hurry! I’m helping out in the hospital. The ER is quite hectic today.” Sakura answered as she smiled sheepishly. ‘phew that came off better than I had wanted.’

“Hn, I’ve been told.” Sasuke replied as he noticed she got nervous all of a sudden.

“I didn’t know you volunteered help.” he answered as he gave her the fallen book.

“Thanks. Err Actually, I’ve been volunteering in the hospital for almost 3 months now.” She showed a look of disappointment but immediately changed it to a brighter one before he caught it.

Sasuke’s eyebrows seems to have rose at this. He looked amused. Shouldn’t she be training instead of volunteering? It’d be much better if she can take care of herself more than helping others.

It was just very typical of her. That’s why he always felt the need to protect her. Because she always cared about others and forgot to think about herself.

“Anyways, Take care Sasuke-kun! I need to help out in the hospital I’m in need of a very important study today. I’ll see you at 7!” She waved off with a sweet smile.

“hn.”

‘smiles, her smiles are always so innocent.’

He thought as he watched her retreating back and hurried for the stairs.

For a really weird reason he found her smiles the most comforting. Yet never really dwelled on the matter. There were more important things he needed to do. Like training for the finals. And get stronger and kill his brother

He scowled quietly for thinking this way and followed the path to team seven’s training grounds.

It was only for a moment when he started training and came back from the hospital all patched up from his self-inflicted wounds.

He looked very serious and keen on his training until

he felt an enigmatic presence lurking in the forest. He activated his sharingan in secret and continued to train so he wouldn’t look obvious.

‘Chakra.’ One that seemingly is ranked as jounin or chuunin if he knew maybe even anbu. Someone was watching him from the shadows.

'Tch, he never even bothered to hide it.' He thought as he threw the kunai he was holding that was supposedly aimed for the training dummy to the open forest.

“Show yourself.” He said as he glared a few meters away from the training dummy he was training with just minutes ago.

“Hmm… It seems you have caught me. Uchiha”

A red head boy stepped away from the shade of the trees and came forward gracefully.

“Pleasantries.” Gaara said in a very calm but dangerous voice.

“What do you want Gaara?” Sasuke glared and growled.

“Oh, nothing I just wanted to get to know my opponent better.” He smiled. “Maybe this way, I could know your weakness.” The intense glares he had sent off to Gaara did little than to mock him.

“Oh wait, I think I wouldn’t be needing that. You already are.”

Sasuke grunted and strengthened the glare he only gave at Gaara. Sasuke's fist whitened from rage.

He dare say that to his face. He hadn’t even seen his skills when he trained for this examination 3 months ago.

“I can’t feel nothing but excitement at the feel of your bones being crushed by my sand.” He said and smiled wickedly and gave a dark laugh.

Sasuke the arrogant guy he was happened to earn himself a challenge. “Why don’t you ask yourself?” Sasuke said in a dangerous tone and readied for his battle stance. Taunting him.

“A challenge I see…” Gaara’s knuckles turned white from the tension. His eyes gleamed in attempt for murder. His bloodlust getting all excited as he felt the need to kill something immediately however he composed himself. There was little time left for him to mock a weakling.

“It would be a shame if I killed you right now.” Gaara said tauntingly. Sasuke growled audibly and Gaara almost let off a snicker.

“Besides, I want to see you die in front of the audience.” Gaara smiled and continued.

“ I will show them just how much of an excuse you are for a ninja.” He laughed darkly. That’s it, He just snapped. He had to have his head right now.

“Tch! Why you-!” Sasuke said as he launched in front of him.

“T’Hahahaha.” Gaara looked so twisted. His lips plastered on his cheek too widely as he saw his plan unraveling, getting him all worked up and looking like an idiot.

“STOP!” A tough female voice rang out of nowhere.

“Gaara! Where have you been? We’ve been looking everywhere for you!” A blonde sand ninja said. She looked familiar but he never really gave an effort to remember her name. It was no time for pleasantries.

“Temari. Get out of my way.” Gaara glared.

He looked like was ready to snap. The girl could only gasp as she looked at Gaara nervously, as sweat dripped from he brows.

The Kazakage their father would surely have their heads if Gaara created more trouble. Yet it could also get her killed if she stopped him. Handling Gaara was a very much delicate matter. One wrong move and you're dead.

She willed herself to speak and not to chicken out. It was her duty anyway. They were still siblings, in blood or not. Even though it killed for her to think this way.

“Father is looking for you.” She said as her heart beat too fast.

Just as she said this a Boy carrying puppets and wearing make up came rushing into them.

“Gaara, Father has sent us to fetch you. He has a very urgent matter to discuss with us please must come along, immediately.”

The newcomer said this with obvious nervousness. The tension could just kill them.

“Fine.” Gaara said in finality. He glared at the Uchiha and gave him his wicked smile.

“Till then, Uchiha…” Gaara said as he turned around following his siblings to the open forest.

“Tch! That bastard.” Sasuke muttered and continued to glare daggers behind their backs. He composed himself and started to train more.

Giving the kunai a harsh grip and throwing it with force. He had to let his frustrations out. He had to train and become much stronger. Truly those sand siblings were always bored and looking for trouble.

Sasuke wanted nothing more for the exams to end.

He willed himself not to dwell on what just happened earlier and continue to strive harder on his training. Yet, seeing it as it is the doctor had said that doing strenuous activities for the matter would reopen his wounds and it would likely render him useless in training.

He looked at his arm and instead remembered the events before going to the hospital.

‘Hn, Sakura.’

It was already 7:30 and surprisingly enough Sakura was running a little late past behind their team meeting.

__________________________

“I got it!” Sakura said in finality. Sachi could only gasp. ’t-this kid…!’

"Let me see, let me see!" Sachi said excitedly. after knowing the results and the poisoned blood returned to its original shade she could only jumpp in glee and hug the kid tight.

‘That’s amazing Sakura-chan!!” she screamed in delight!

"The formulas are finally done! Now the rest is up for distribution!” Sachi exclaimed.

“We’ll handle it from here, I know you’re running a little late for your team training. I’m truly sorry for that!” Sachii said in a bow. Sakura checked the clock on the wall and gasped.“Oh no! You’re right!” She gave out a horrified expression. What would Sasuke-kun say to her about being tardy? but she didn't dwell on the matter far longr when she remembered that this antidote she had just created will save many lives as of this day and the next.

“It’s okay Sachi-san it was a pleasure working with you. And I’m glad I could help!” Sakura said happily.

“I have truly no words! You know we could offer you a position here in the hospital if something comes up! I’ll arrange the paperworks and all will be good!”

Ami said happily and Sakura gasped as Sachi giggled.

“Besides, you’ve been helping out for a while now, and I’ve been guessing it’s what you wanted in the first place when you came here. Am I right?”

“Yes! Of course!” Sakura said excitedly. “Thank you so much Sachi-san!” she screamed in delight and hugged the 20-year old medic.

“aww! You’re welcome Sakura-chan!” and she hugged back. Truly Sakura was too sweet for her own.

“I will do my best and I promise you won’t ever regret this decision!” Sakura said in finality and hurried for the door.

“I must go now! Sasuke-kun must already be there!” Sakura said and ran off for the training grounds.

“wait-! Sakura! you’re wrist...!” Sachi exclaimed. Yet after she uttered these words Sakura was already out the door. ‘Oh, dearie that girl could be really reckless.’

“Oh, shoot I’m super late!” Sakura said as she ran on the streets of Konoha looking at her watch it already read 7:48

Sakura could only gasp and gave out a horrified expression. She wasn’t always the type for tardiness. She always showed up on time and kept that record straight up. That is until this fateful day.

‘This may sound lame but Kakashi sensei isn’t there yet anyways. And Naruto always comes up after an hour. That leads to Sasuke probably training alone on the training grounds.’

‘heh. This is never happening again.’ She thought.

After a few minutes of sprinting Sakura managed to arrive at the rendezvous.

and spot the boy she endeared.

“Hn, youre late.” Sasuke said as she arrived at 7:56 almost 8.

Sakura cursed mentally. “Ah! Sasuke-kun! I’m sorry. It took a while for us and the medic team to complete the formula but all is well and-!”

but was cut off by Sasuke already close enough within range. And soon enough he grasped her wrist that was injured. She hissed from the pain.

It was still bleeding profusely. ’I had completely forgotten about that!’ Sakura gasped in surprise.

“What happened?” Sasuke asked as he inspected the wound. “ah-! Eeeh. S-sasuke-kun” she said muttering lamely. She just had to act all shy whenever he was this close.

“You should take care of yourself more Sakura.” Sasuke said. as he puled out some ointments and bandages.

“It gets really annoying.” As Sasuke wrapped her wounds with the bandages.

She couldn’t see his expression because of his hair blocking her view. But she knew that he only cared. Yet seeing him like this only made her feel like a burden. The thought of his wrist having the same injury as hers were quite beguiling.

But she had intentionally cut her wrist this way so she could let him know that she noticed.

"Please, do the the same." She gave a somewhat pleading look as she replied secretly muttering the words and looked away immediately.

Sasuke caught sight of her expression and heard everything she said.

Sakura already knew what his wounds meant the very first time she saw it.

although the thought was so unbelievable she knew everything was possible no matter how much she wanted to deny herself she knew that he did it to himself intentionally. and he was suffering more intensely and was keeping it to himself alone again.

"What do you mean?" He asked in assumption. and stopped at his actions.

"Iiie! w-what? I didn't say anything" she all but said ridiculously.

'I guess I'm not quite ready to face him with this matter, but I have to!' She thought nervously

"Tch whatever." He said as he continued to roll the bandage around her wound. She was acting all weird again.

He felt slightly good when the injury was covered from his view. But the very reminder of her wearing these bandages only made it worse. Because underneath his wrist protectors he also worse of them.

He had a personal pull from his gruesome feelings when he saw her with this kind of injury. And he knew very damn well what it was.

Sasuke being the teammate he was only worried for her well-being and seeing the sight of her wrist bleeding only made his stomach churn.

“Ah- Thank you. I’m sorry. But you see I had to cut myself so I could test out the poison with my blood. And cutting it this way will give out more sample so-” Sakura said in a weak tone.

This in turn only made Sasuke pause on what he was doing. His expression looked unreadable. But turned away immediately.

The intentions for both of them were downright different despite how the same process of the injury goes.

Her wound meant to save others. While his were to hurt himself.

Oh, the irony.

'tch, always hurting herself and helping others.'

He made the wrong assumption. And for the first time he was glad.

“Hn, whatever.” He said.

Ever since the events from the forest of death she had begun acting this way. And it irked him because he always noticed.

“Just, don’t do it again.” He muttered the last part and tied the final knot.

He was met with a deafening silence from her which was odd. And quite frankly she was staring at him with an intense expression. Something that she only gave out when she was so sure of something.

#sasusaku #sasusaku genin #sasusaku fic #sasusaku fanfic #otp

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phandictioned · 7 years

Note

I'm not trying to be pushy or anything, but will you ever post that prompt about the weight gain?

I’m sorry! I went through such writers block for a while. But you caught me at the perfect time as I just finished reading an angsty fic and was in the right frame of mind for something like this. Here you go! I hope you like it. I didn’t have the time to reread it for errors or anything so sorry about that!

AO3 Link

Dan’s mouth hangs open, eyes closed in pure bliss. Phil is leaving scolding, rough kisses along his jaw. His hands hold Dan’s body solid where they sit on the couch. They’ve been at it for a while now and things have only gotten more intense as the minutes pass. Dan’s aware of how sore his lips and tongue are but it’s certainly not something he’s concerned about. His hands are fisted in Phil’s shirt determined to keep him there forever even if Phil doesn’t seem inclined to leave anytime soon. Phil is panting against his lips and Dan can feel his heart pounding a hundred miles an hour where his other hand presses against the older boy’s chest. He feels teeth scrape gently along the pulse point on his neck and groans obnoxiously. Phil chuckles against his skin and does it again. Phil is so good at this. Which Dan is grateful for, though it also makes him wonder who he’s the chance to practice on and if he things about too hard the thought drives him mad. After all, they’ve been friends for years and Dan doesn’t recall seeing too many people trudge up the stairs to Phil’s room. There was that one guy…Kevin…

Dan however, is still new to this. Not the kissing Phil thing. That’s been going on since their realized very non-platonic feelings for each other were expressed a few months ago. And when they first met in person all those years ago there had certainly been drunken make out sessions that they didn’t speak of the following mornings. That had been a long time ago though. And Dan hasn’t been very…active since that time. Over those years a lot has happened. Him and Phil’s popularity sky rocketed, events happened, interviews occurred, they’d even started writing a book and for Christ’s sake. As their entire career involves the internet they’ve spent a lot more time on it as well. Yes, believe it or not this does all have to do with why Dan’s heart suddenly flips anxiously as Phil’s hand slides down his back and onto his hip, not so subtly playing with the loose part of his shirt. Dan’s eyes shoot open in panic. You see, all this sitting around on the internet, eating pizzas because the book gives them little brain power to think of something to make for dinner, existential crisis causing him to lay in bed till two PM…all of this has resulted in some weight gain. When Dan first noticed the changes to his body he tried desperately to change his eating habits. But Phil was no help to that as he enjoyed the pizza as much as Dan did. Why didn’t the bastard seem to gain weight at all, no matter how much he ate, thought Dan bitterly. His frustrated thought came out in a physical as he bit and pulled at Phil’s bottom lip. Phil yelped but the act only made him more excited. He pushed Dan down onto his back, forcing a breath out of the younger. Shit, shit, now look at what you’ve done, Dan curses at himself. Him and Phil hadn’t necessarily discussed the idea of sex in their growing relationship just yet. But it’s certainly been on their minds. But things are different now. Dan has grown up. He didn’t have the skinny, tanned, tight body that he did when him and Phil were last sexually active together. Dan hates that he cares so much about how he looks. He knows Phil. Phil is the least judgmental person he’s ever meant and the fact that he’s afraid of what the man will think of him is very unfair. He’s aware of that. It’s not as if Phil hasn’t seen him with his clothes off. It’s just…different now. Oh God. Dan says to himself as Phil’s hand inches up his shirt. His body is very ready to accept this touch but his mind starts reeling. He can’t let this happen yet. He needs to lose weight first. Yeah, that’s a good idea. He will put himself a diet right away and the Phil will never know how bad Dan has allowed himself to get. Dan releases his hold on Phil’s shirt and encircles the wrist of the hand that has continued moving under his shirt. His mouth still engulfed in Phil’s he shakes his head fervently, fear punching him in the stomach. Of course Phil is going to think that Dan simply doesn’t want to have sex with him. He’s going to think the worst. He’s going to think Dan doesn’t want him at all even that is completely, absolutely not true in the slightest. If it wasn’t for this slight problem, Dan would likely be shoving his hands down the man’s pants.His predictions of Phil’s thoughts are confirmed when the older pulls away, resting his elbows on either side of Dan’s body and looking down at him in hurt wonderment. His eyes begging for an explanation. He tilts his head to the side and Dan wants to cry with how horrible of a person he is. His emotion is apparently evident in his eyes. Phil reaches a hand up and brushes the hair from his face “Dan? What’s wrong?” His voice is so utterly pitiful, so sad sounding. “I…I just…can we…I don’t want to. Okay? I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry.” Dan swallows the painful lump in his throat. “Shhh, it’s okay. I can wait for as long as you need.” Phil shakes his head in understanding. Or what he thinks is understanding. He places a chaste kiss on the boy beneath him’s forehead. “It’s okay Dan, really. It doesn’t change anything.”Dan’s voice comes out shakily. “Are you sure? You promise?”Phil smiles at him. “Of course I’m sure. I want you tonight but I’ll want you every other night too. But can you tell me why you don’t want to continue? Am I doing anything that makes you uncomfortable?” Dan lets out a short burst of laughter. “No. I just…” He averts his eyes, scanning briefly over himself and subconsciously. Trying to suck in his stomach. “You haven’t seen me…without clothes on for a while. I mean…not in a sexual sense.” Dan feels his face burning with humiliation. Phil’s eyebrows draw together in confusion. “So?”Dan’s eyes widen. “So? So I’m not that skinny teenager you used to make out with! The pizzas and the sleeping in and of my God.” Dan covers his eyes with his hands and groans. When Phil doesn’t say anything and he can’t handle the silence anymore he peeks from between his fingers. Phil has a cheesy smile on his face and is looking at him. Dan drops his hands slowly. “What? Don’t look at me like that.”“Dan, you are so, incredibly ridiculous and blind.”“W-what?” Dan replies uncertain of what Phil means.Phil snorts a laugh before pushing himself up into a sitting position. He takes Dan’s hand and pulls him up too. He places a hand on Dan’s cheek, stroking it and fiddling with his hair. He’s staring at Dan with so much affection that an unexpected pain burst through Dan’s chest. How could he look at Dan that way? He certainly didn’t deserve it. “Daniel Howell, since the day I saw that MySpace profile picture, and seeing you in person at that trains station, and staring across for you at that Starbucks, you’ve been the most beautiful, sexiest person I could ever hope to have in my life.”“But that’s the things Phil. That was when I was younger!” Dan tries to tell him. Phil only shakes his head. He takes Dan’s hands in his own. “I thought that a year ago when I woke up on my birthday and watched you make me pancakes in the kitchen. And when we spent an entire day doing nothing but play Mario Kart in our pajamas. And at that YouTube party where I watched you beside me, holding a drink and laughing at something I said that was probably not that funny.”“Phil-” Dan started, shaking his head and looking away. He was just trying to make Dan feel better. That’s what Phil does. He couldn’t mean any of this.“No. I’m not finished. And then there’s that time you fell asleep on the couch after having a little too much to drink and I wanted to kiss you so badly. Oh, Dan you have no idea how badly I wanted to kiss you in that moment and I couldn’t because you weren’t mine yet.” Phil closes his eyes as if recalling the memory. He sighs happily. Dan swallows, meeting Phil’s eyes when he opened them again. And still Phil doesn’t stop. The man leans close to Dan, whispering against his lips, his voice trembling slightly. “I’ve wanted you to be mine for so long Dan. And you are now and I love you. I’ve always loved you. You as a person, you as Daniel James Howell,” Phil tilts Dan’s head up to kiss him lightly, so gently that Dan almost doesn’t feel it. “You drive me crazy. Your body drives me crazy. I want to be with you Dan. I want everything about you to be mine.” Dan’s breath hitches as a hand snakes up his shirt again. Fingers tickle his abdomen and he’s squeezes his eyes shut in panic and disgust for himself. He’s about to pull away and Phil knows it. He connects their lips again, more fervently this time. He moans into the kiss and Dan’s body shutters as Phil’s hand skims across his skin. Phil pulls just a centimeter away to whisper something against his cheek. “Does it look like I care at all about anything you’ve just said? Tell me Dan.”“No.” Dan can barely speak the word but he knows it’s the truth. Phil really doesn’t care about how he looks. But he does care about he feels and that’s why he’s saying all of these things. Dan closes his eyes, pushing forward and kissing Phil again. Dan has a hundred negative thoughts about himself and no one has ever been able to change his mind about a single one of them until this moment. “Good. Now, is there any chance we can continue where we left off?” Dan grins against Phil’s lips and nods defiantly. “Please.”

Inspire me! Send me prompts!

#phanfic #phanfiction #phan #phandom #phan prompts #phan prompt

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imagineironfalcon · 8 years

Note

Imagine IronFalcon in the 'my Nana thought you're my boyfriend so now I have to bring you to thanksgiving dinner or I'm pretty sure she's going to hate me forever' situation where they're good friends who have to pretend to be boyfriends, and then becoming boyfriends for real.

(Watch out for the cut)

“So you don’thave actual plans for Thanksgiving,right?”

Tony glanced upas Sam sat down next to him, fingers already tapping nervously over thetextbooks for their shared lit class.

“Actual plans?”he echoed, and Sam nodded. “You mean like, actual plans besides the ‘annoy theshit out of Howard until Mom asks me to stop’ plans I already mentioned?”

Sam noddedagain.

“No,” Tony saidslowly. “No actual plans.”

“Good, good. Souh, I have a situation.”

Tony’s eyesnarrowed, suspicious and wary. “I’ve got a bad feeling about this….”

“Stop quotingStar Wars at me,” Sam said, then blurted, “Nana thinks you’re my boyfriend anddemanded I bring you to Thanksgiving dinner so she can finally meet you.”

“She… what?How’d she get that idea?” Tony yelped, eyes going wide and panicked.

“I don’t know!”Sam said back desperately. “She just did, okay, and she’s so happy aboutmeeting you and I am pretty sure if I show up without you that she’s going tohate me forever! Tony!” Sam whined. “I can’t have my nana hating me forever,she makes the best pies and she’ll not make my favorite for me if she’sdespairing that we’re not actually dating!”

Tony made arough noise, like a scoff. “She’ll hate us both if you lie to her!”

“Only a littlebit!”

“This is a bad idea,” Tony insisted.

“It’s just forThanksgiving! You’ll get free food out of it! I’ll buy you all the coffee youwant for the rest of the semester!”

Tony paused,giving him an incredulous look. “Finals are coming up. That’s a horriblepromise to make, Sam.”

“I am that desperate,” Sam said seriously.“Please?”

After a moment,Tony sighed, caving. “Alright, alright,” he muttered. “I’ll pretend to be yourdamn boyfriend, even though I think this is a horrible idea.”

“Thank you,”Sam gushed, hugging Tony for a moment before sitting back and opening histextbook. “Okay. Now that that crisis is over, on to this one.”

Tony grumbled,but opened his book as well.

~*~*~

“Mom,” Tonytried, and sighed when she interrupted him again. He turned, leaning againstthe doorframe, putting his back to Rhodey who was watching him closely thoughpretending not to. Quieter, Tony repeated, “Mom, please. It’s justThanksgiving. I’ll come home for Christmas.” That seemed to, finally, appeaseher, though she made him repeat his promise before she let him go.

Tony hung upand went to plop into his desk chair, spinning it in circles. Thanksgiving wasin two days. He should probably back.

“So you’rereally going to do this?” Rhodey asked, scribbling notes for one of his physicstextbooks.

“I told Sam Iwould,” Tony reminded him.

Rhodey lookedat him, brows furrowed. “Yeah, but won’t it be awkward?”

“Nah, notreally.” Tony spun around again. “I mean, a little bit. Sam’s like, my secondbest friend.” Tony shot Rhodey a grin. “But it’s just for a few days.”

“You describedthis whole thing to me as ‘the worst idea you’d ever agreed to’.”

Tony waved hishand dismissively.

Rhodey shookhis head after a moment, muttering to himself about idiots and how he hoped Godreally did protect fools – or something to that effect. Tony stopped reallypaying attention, instead debating if, as the “boyfriend”, he should bring somekind of gift. He was pretty sure that was the kind of good manners his momwould want him to have.

“What kind ofgifts do you bring to your pretend boyfriend’s family for Thanksgiving?” Tonyasked aloud.

Rhodey groanedand thunked his head down onto his textbook.

~*~*~

“We shouldprobably hold hands,” Sam muttered as they walked up the porch steps.

“Good idea,”Tony said, and linked their fingers just in time for the door to be yankedopen.

“Mom, Sam’s finally here!” yelled the kidon the other side of the door. He looked back at them, eyes locking on theirhands, and made a face. “Oh god, are you going to be as gross as Sarah now?”

“Shut up, Gid,”Sam said, pushing open the screen door to get inside.

Tony bit back asnicker when the kid – Sam’s brother, Gideon – grumbled, “That means yes. Ugh.”

Tony met Sam’s parents,Darlene and Paul, and his sister Sarah. It was a whirlwhind of hugs andhandshakes and loud voices all talking over each other catching up and greetingand Tony grinned the whole time.

He didn’t meetthe infamous Nana until they stepped into the kitchen, after they’d storedtheir stuff in Sam’s old room. Tony had been aiming for coffee; he wasintercepted and appraised by keen eyes in a lined face.

He froze. “Um…hi?”

“You’re Sammy’sboyfriend he’s been hiding from us?”

“…Yes?”

Her eyesnarrowed. “He tried to tell me he didn’t have a boyfriend. But I told him,there’s no way something put that kind of light and happiness on your facewhile talking about studying of allthings unless it’s a boy.”

Tony scratchedat his hair, down to his neck, and grinned sheepishly. “My best friend Rhodeycalled us fools, if that helps?”

She cracked asmile, the crinkles at her eyes thickening, and reached up to pat Tony’s cheek.“Does explain some things, yes.” She shook her head, turning to stir somethingon the stove – it smelled delicious, Tony wondered if Nana would be as sharp atprotecting food from tasting fingers as Jarvis was. “Sammy never could tellwhen someone was flirting with him.”

Tony snorted. “Herecognizes flirting just fine,” Tony said, as he noticed Sam walking into theroom. He grinned slyly. “Just so long as it’s completely cheesy.”

Sam rolled hiseyes, not missing a beat as he added, “Thankfully for me that’s the only kindof flirting Tony knows how to do.”

“Excuse you, Ican flirt just fine, you just never notice it when I’m being smooth!”

“Uh huh,” Samsaid, in a voice that completely conveyed ‘I’m just saying this to pacify you’.“Sure you can.”

Tony cast aquick look to be sure Nana wasn’t looking before flipping the bird.

Sam stuck histongue out.

~*~*~

Sharing the bedwasn’t a problem. Sam warned Tony that he snored, and Tony told him veryseriously that he would probably cling to Sam in his sleep worse than anoctopus, and they climbed under the sheets.

In the morningthey woke up with Tony using Sam as a pillow, arms and legs tangled together,and Sam snoring in Tony’s ear. They stretched and climbed out of bed and gotready, moving around each other easily.

Sam made Tonysome coffee, while Tony plopped across the entire couch in front of thefireplace. Gideon came in a few minutes later and whined for Tony to move hisfeet, but Tony just stared at him with a smile and raised brow until Sam camein with two cups.

Tony lifted hislegs for Sam to sit, and then put them in Sam’s lap. Sam passed over Tony’scoffee, just how he liked it.

Gideon groanedin despair and went to sit in one of the armchairs.

The daycontinued smoothly. No one seemed to pick up that they were only pretending tobe boyfriends.

To be fair, Samand Tony didn’t have to change their behaviors too much. No one seemed toexpect them to kiss or anything. They held hands a bit more, but the sittingclose and hugging and snuggling wasn’t that unusual. Tony was physically affectionatewith his friends, and Sam liked to reciprocate.

They banteredlike usual. Talked with Sam’s family. Sent Rhodey and Steve some snapchats ofthem, because their plan was gong perfectly despite best friend disapproval,and they both wanted to rub that in their faces.

They atedinner, played some games with Sam’s family, and went to bed again.

Tony stretchedthe next morning when he woke up before Sam, and rested his chin on his hands,over the top of Sam’s chest.

Sam keptsnoring.

Smiling, Tonywatched Sam for a few moments, before rolling out of bed and going to makehimself some coffee. Nana and Paul were already awake, sitting at the smallkitchen table in the corner, next to a sunny window. Tony joined them; none ofthem spoke, just sat and enjoyed the quiet and sunlight and coffee together.

When Sam cameout, pajama pants with little Superman symbols all over them low on his hips,covering his feet because they were too long, Tony smiled. He held out hiscoffee, and Sam sipped at it, before nudging Tony over so they were sharing thesame chair. It was far from comfortable.

Tony stole hiscoffee back before Sam could drink all of it, the thief.

~*~*~

“You know, thatwent… shockingly well,” Tony said onthe ride back.

“You’re thatsurprised?” Sam asked, glancing over his shoulder as he merged.

Tony shrugged,flipping through his music to find something good. “A bit? I mean I didn’texpect it to go epically wrong like some after school special or anything,” hesaid. “But I didn’t expect it to go that smoothly either. Like, seriously Sam.That was easy. It shouldn’t have been that easy to pretend to be dating.”

Sam was quietfor a little while, then said, “Yeah, probably not.”

“No one even suspected, did they?” Tony continuedwonderingly. “We were apparently like, super fucking awesome boyfriends.”

“Hell yeah wewere,” Sam said with a proud grin.

Tony laughed.He tilted his head back against the headrest, then turned it until he wasstaring right at Sam, thinking.

“You know, Iwouldn’t mind dating you for real.”

“Oh yeah?”

Tony nodded. “Sure.You’re smart. Funny. Caring. Damn fine. You laugh at my corny jokes.”

Sam snorted.

“You actuallylike me for me,” Tony continued, quieter. “You listen when I’m upset, and tryto make me feel better.”

“That’s whatfriends are supposed to do.”

“Yeah,” Tonysaid softly. “I don’t have many of those. Would hate to lose one. But if thepayoff was a super awesome boyfriend….”

Sam glanced athim, quick, before focusing back on the road.

“You want togive it a shot? For reals?”

“If you wantto,” Tony said. “I’m happy being friends. I think I could be happy beingboyfriends, too. So whatever would make you happy….”

He waited whileSam thought it over. He glanced at Tony some more, a few times.

“I wouldn’tmind dating you either,” he said. “All that stuff you said about me, I think it’strue for you too. Smart, obviously. And funny, with those corny jokes,” heteased. “Caring, despite how other people take advantage of it or misinterpretit. Always trying to help people.”

Smilingslightly, Tony slid his fingers slowly over the console. Sam dropped one handfrom the wheel and linked fingers with Tony at the edge of his seat.

“Rhodey andSteve are going to be so exasperated,” Tony chuckled quietly.

“Just an addedbonus,” Sam said, grinning cheerfully.

~*~*~

Tony leanedover and whispered to Sam, “I bet only dogs can hear the noises they’re making,”when they told their best friends they were now boyfriends during lunch the dayafter returning to campus.

Sam almostsnorted lemonade out his nose.

#ironfalcon #prompts #tony stark #sam wilson #tonyxsam #jules #marvelingjules #no powers au #college au #pretend relationship #get-together #anonymous

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ts-nightingaleislands · 5 years

Text

Episode #8- “people are going to be blindsided and i'm people”- Vincent

Holy guacamole I feel terrible. On one end I have four people who decided to work together and on the other end are people they told I wanted out. I am at a bit of a loss here but I always like a challenge! I'm gonna go finish my thinking, see if it sticks, and go then voice it!

wow how am i even still here because of my strong social connections! just 7ish tribals until the end! that's so much...i have no idea what's about to happen over the next few weeks except that people are going to be blindsided and i'm people a big part of my pitch to rizo and chris was that cheatham is a threat and he needs to go...which is why now that we're all together i'm in an alliance with all of them, as well as austin and noah. this six is absolutely not going to stick together but i'm in the middle so when it falls i'm not taking the hit! annmarie and liam are cool as well, so ideally the merge vote is between sara and kyle. for me i would ideally keep kyle bc he seems less likely to try and blow up the game in a way which is bad for me, like i feel like he may help me down the line. so i'm going to try to push for that. however, neither annmarie or liam are worth saving at this time so if either of their names come up i'm going along with it this is the first time i've merged in nearly a year and i'm ready to overplay and flop!

Right now Im in an alliance with...Austin, Noah, Rizo, Vincent, and Cheatham by the name of Bottom Feeders. Tbh its just irony at this poiint I am going to end up working with people I wanted out but hey that's Survivor!

(LATER)

My plan of action is to talk with Kyle, consider having a aide alliance with him and Rizo where we get AM/Sara/Liam out and then have BF target Cheatham and/or Noah or whoever in F8/F7..stay tuned!

(EVEN LATER)

Mark my words, this week is going to expose Austin! He has Liam/AM/Sara wanting him and then Bottom Feeders so no matter how this immunity goes and tribal, he will be seen sketchy to somebody.

Wow, So last week I decided what was going on bc i have the idol. If Gwen knew how to stop talking then maybe i would’ve. ANYWAYS, this week. So I got put in three alliances. Big Time Thrush (which I was already in from pre merge) which consists of Me, Noah, Austin, and Vincent. Then there is Bottom Feeders, consisting of Me, Noah, Austin, Vincent, Rizo, Chris. Basically Rizo and Chris made that bc they are on the bottom. I don’t trust it at all. Finally, the one that i’m actually sticking with, is The Frock Destroyers, which consists of Me, Noah, Liam, Austin, Ann Marie, and Sara.... JK i’m not working with that. There is a secret 4th alliance that is the same as the last one but without Noah. I know Noah is probably reading this. Basically, I don’t like the way he talks to me. Outside of the game, I would LOVE to stay friends with Noah bc i’m sure he is a great person. INSIDE the game however, i do not appreciate when someone tells me to shut up, calls me an idiot, or tells me i’m stupid. That is NOT okay. He never listens to my ideas and he acts like this idol, is his. This idol is mine PERIOD. I was his puppet early on because i was so busy with life shit. But now i’m realizing the way he is treating me/ using me. And revenge is gonna be awesome.

Ugh....this is like trying to choose which puppy is cuter when both are identical!! It doesn't WERK! Fricken the only people I really trust fully is AnnMarie and Liam but we can't get on the same damn page. AnnMarie leans more towards Rizo/Chris/Kyle but I have DEALT with them and I know how they are. And it's been confirmed that Kyle won't split from Rizo...he said it on call that they're tight. I like Kyle...don't get me wrong...but he leaks EVERYTHING (so do I...but that's different, right?) and twists and turns things. Yes, working with OG Thrush is risky AF, but so is working against the idol and with a [new] trio, some of which have ALREADY voted for you. I mean...I've done this before where I completely flip on my old 'tribe' to work with the other side and I've won...so it isn't impossible. I also generally just don't click with the other side (as in Chris/Kyle/Rizo) as well as I do with the noobs....so even if they are tight....I'm either on the bottom of the original Petrel or the original Thrush. Noah fence....but I like Thrush better and would rather lose to them than Petrel. And that's just the way it is!

So we gave Sara immunity, I want to use it as strategy to possibly have her like me again but we will see if it works. As far everything else, Austin wants Kyle/Rizo gone. I dont know where it leaves me in his ideal pecking order but Im not waiting around long enough to ask.

(LATER)

Nah, Im not accepting this. Im not waiting for Rizo to be voted out to make mends either. Im gonna get this Petrel chat going and maybe it is the one thing that can save him and me. Im not putting all my eggs into the Bottom Feeders basket just yet and sure as heck am not a out to welcome myself to the bottom of the barrel so easily

Wow...a lot has happened. My alliance with Cheatham, Noah, and Austin supposedly merged with Chris and Rizo to create a super alliance. Guess how long that lasted? As far as I can tell, Noah is targeting Austin but tried setting it up to ensure Chris and Rizo take the fall, using information I gave him (not necessarily important info, but something which incriminates Chris/Rizo which I only told him). Austin heard about this, of course, because he's just so good at this game and everyone is gravitating towards him. I've been completely honest with him, so hopefully he has been with me. Originally the vote was supposed to be Rizo, with myself, Austin, Cheatham, Liam, AnnMarie, and Sara on board. This is why Rizo got vote against him at the challenge. However, Rizo has never targeted me personally. Comparing that to Noah, who I have heard from multiple sources was hoping that I was going to be voted out last round, voting to ensure this happened, and it was clear to me that Noah was the bigger threat to my game. Additionally, Cheatham told me things about how condescending Noah would be with him, so at that point I felt like I had to change the vote. Cheatham was on board with it, and I told Austin as well. Liam, Sara, and AnnMarie don't know (as far as I know) as of when I wrote this, but I really don't see a reason as to why they'd not want to vote Noah. After this, it's 9. I don't want to get too far ahead of myself, just to see how the dynamic is structured to truly figure out whether or not Noah is the best move for me. Liam-AM-Sara are essentially a trio, and they're all good with me bc I voted with them and included them all Chris-Rizo will be an even tighter duo, with Kyle as their auxiliary, and they'll all hate me. However, because I pushed the vote off Rizo (which is evidenced by the fact he got the vote at the challenge), I don't think it's fair to say that I ruined these relationships beyond repair, which I would have if Rizo left. Austin is still the most powerful guy in the room, but he's a powerful guy who fully trusts me. Cheatham has the idol, so keeping him on my good side is essential. To be honest, earlier flushing the idol was my top priority, but now I would not mind if he kept the idol for the rest of the game. Doesn't hurt my game, and as long as Austin is here, why would he take a shot at me? So I think it's fair to say that, based on my current understanding of the dynamic, I am making the best move for my game.

Im gradually realizing Cheatham is the answer. We majorly messed up by not giving him immunity and now I want to talk to him to fix it. Rizo doesnt want me to with fear that it could ruin things but like I cant just sit here and do nothing. He doesnt wanna talk to Austin, Austin doesnt want to talk to him, OG Petrel doesnt want to talk to us, and so really this boils down to us needing to persuade Cheatham. I dont feel right if I dont talk to explain how bad of a decision it was and I'll work to fix it but for now Im just gonna do what Rizo says and wait

Merge !! Wohoo this is where the game starts and I must say I’m playing hard. And it’s starting to backfire. Chris not voting AM out our first Petrel tribal really fucked me because it showed where I lied. I was trying to play both sides and unfortunately it’s biting me in the ass. It’s crazy cuz austin is doing the same thing but it’s working for him. I got last in the challenge because my name is being mentioned and the next target. Austin is clearly the snake and I can’t say I’m mad good for him but he is someone I need out. He mentioned my name to Kyle and with a vote on me already I’m assuming I have 5 votes to my name going into tribal. I know I have Chris and Kyle on board to vote with me. Noah is next to go so he is down to vote with me and I saved Vincent so why wouldn’t he vote me. That leaves 5-5 with cheatham being the swing. I’m trying to convince him that I got his back and I truly do he is a power player With that idol and is a great shield. He is upset he wasent granted immunity by our alliance and that is a valid reason but I don’t want that to cost me my game. Cheatham says he is going to try to take the target off my back but I really want him to vote austin out with Us to make it 6-5 blindside. It would be iconic to get out a big player like austin who is playing a Rob C type of game. It just sucks cuz if I go Kyle and Chris my go too guys are next and austin will steamroll you the end. If it��s my time I played the game how I wanted to play. I’m not going to quit until my torch is snuffed but looking at it now, I have a big uphill battle but if I can pull this off, it goes down in the history books.

(LATER)

Oh shit coming back to you with some great? News. Cheatham and austin came to me stating that they will save me and they want Noah out? Is that what I want? NOPE! Will I do that to stay in the game ? YESSIR! Obviously I want noah to stay cuz he is a shield for me and seems to want to work with me but cheatham says Noah has treated him like shit and austin dislikes him. At this rate I have to lay low and just let austin and cheatham make the move to save me. I’ll tell Chris to vote noah and make sure as much votes go to noah as possible. After noah leaves I can regroup and think of a strategy but tonight the goal is to survive no matter who goes besides Chris and Kyle. I need us 3 to stick together to have a chance. But I might have some life in this game !

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Am I a mess for telling Cheatham Bottom Halfs votes in the challenge? Yes. But if it keeps him more likely to want Rizo in then I'll take the consequences

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SOOO. OH BOY. I'm in a pretty good alliance with Sara, Liam, cheatham, and Austin. We are all working together against everyone else. I like the comfort, but it's clear that it won't last for long. Apparently Austin is working both sides, and it's just veryyyy frustrating not knowing if there's another plan you're not a part of. I'm doing pretty good developing the trust I have with others, and I'm happy with how I'm doing right now. I want to nap.

So much has happened! So glad that Gwen's elimination went to plan and even ended up unanimous against her, she would've been even more scary in this merge. I've been taking a deliberate backseat in this past challenge because it's messy as fuck & I'd rather everyone else take the heat at the end of the day, I've not heard my name at all & both sides are speaking to me decently regularly so I don't feel in danger at all tonight. I'm hoping the votes to get Rizo eliminated are there because as much as I like the guy he rarely speaks to me & I'm not keeping around people who refuse to speak to me, enjoy ponderosa!

As of now I think the Noah votes over. Noah conveniently is told and only 4 people knew it. So it tells me that Cheatham/Austin probably planned to set us up or something. So now I just want to get Austin to own up to things...which is unlikely

Fuck Kyle lmao chatting shit at tribal with his fake woke bullshit, I'm so over this tribal & I can't wait for it to be over so we can move on and get the rest of this game underway because there's so many more angles I wanna explore & I need the people I know I can't work with on the jury.

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9 votes Rizo, 2 votes Austin.

#announcement

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