Tumgik
#all i can find are the first two chapters on yt
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I see these everywhere. and i mean EVERYWHERE. and also i need motivation so lets go ig
10 notes- i'll drink on weekends too(i forget cos on weekends im just at home and not at school lugging around my frank green in my tote bag)
20 notes- i will(try to) pay attention in class
30 notes- i'll watch my whole watch later playlist on yt
50 notes- i'll actually do the techniques im learning in ✨therapy✨ to help with my anxiety and shitty social skills
75 notes- i'll take my iron tablets every day
100 notes- i'll start my assessments when i get them(i have one due tomorrow which i was gonna finish now but i'm doing this apparently)
125 notes- i'll ask my crush to hangout alone during spring holidays
150 notes- i'll try to go for a run or at least a walk every day
500 notes- i'll write another chapter of my fanfiction
1k notes- i will actually make an effort to get clean
2k notes- if i see someone pretty that i want to go out w in public i'll ask for their number cos holy fuck i need to put myself out there. even if we js end up being friends cos holy shit im lonely
3k notes- i will actually finished the dress i started making
4k notes- i will try to get over my crush cos its ✨never gonna happen✨(she so pretty and masc tho its gonna be hard)
5k notes- (this is so far up here cos idk how to do this so im gonnna need a lot of time to figure out how) im gonna try to demolish the rumour that im gay thats going around a bit.**
6k notes- i will finish all my crochet projects and not start any new ones until im done.
**context. i go to an all girls school and theres a lot of people so its not like everyone knows everyone, even in my year(theres approx. 174 in my year alone, and theres 6 year groups at my school cos high school is 7-12 where i live) but some people know me ig cos i know a few girl who are more notable, im in the top class and i recdntly started sitting with a group that the popular girls call furries.
(theyre a pretty big group and popular girls hate them cos one or two of them are trans - ftm, ftnb etc, no mtf cos my lovely/s catholic school wouldnt let trans girls in- several of them are gay, a few of them are emo, most of them are poc's and a few of them dont have english as their first language. overall they are seen as the "weird kids" in my year)
so this rumour apparently is going around that i like a girl in my class(i absolutely do but if you havent noticed my school is hella hoomophobic and i could very well get beat) which js isnt ideal and is gonna lead to a lot of issues, especially if a lot of people start believing it so if you guys have any advice pls lmk. and its not like i can js get a fake bf and show him off cos its a GIRLS SCHOOL. if i reconnect with a friend from primary school tho we could pretend to be dating and like make a post on social media. but then kids at his school would find out and hed either have to tell them its fake(which would eventually find its way back to my school, and when i say eventually i mean immediately) or he couldnt get a girlfriend so that probs wouldnt work.
i know it sounds like im making a mountain out of a molehill but ive got years to go here and i dont want to spend all my high school years getting bullied bc even if i went to a teacher about it or smthing id have to like analyse them first and try to figure out which ones are homophobic or not.
like learning about why "being gay is a sin"(pretend im saying that really mockingly) is literally in our curriculum.
holy shit that was longer than expected.
no pressure tags: @wishiwereheather13 @loserboyfriendrjl @fracturedsunsets @chasingthemoony @stars-and-leather @starsofleo
thats all im doing idk how you guys can stand js copy and pasting moots over and over i cant do this i did the first six that came up and that seems like enough 🤷‍♀️
begun doing
going to do
finished
79 notes · View notes
purpletrashcans · 6 months
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i can't find the old solitaire audiobook anymore😭😭
59 notes · View notes
greensagephase · 2 months
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Nonviolent Communication - Part 17
Pairing: Spider-Man!Miguel O'Hara x Spider-Woman!Reader Summary: Miguel has been distant lately and you don't know why. Word Count: 23.9k Warnings: distant Miguel; he displays similar behaviors from the beginning of the fic, no sleeping and skipping meals; tones/mentions of death; small moment in which reader misunderstands Miguel's words and thinks he means something else (him wanting to be gone permanently); lots of fluff memories; both Miguel and you cry; lyrics for some of the songs (two) will be sprinkled in the dialogue, I tried my best to translate for one, while for the other one you can search it up. You may already know the meaning behind it since I think most of Miguel nation knows this one song already. I think that's it. If you find something else, pls let me know :) Music (Spotify playlist): "rises the moon (piano version)" - goated. "Baila Esta Cumbia" - Selena "Las Mañanitas" - Vicente Fernández (birthday song for Mexicans, at least) "someday i'll get it" - Alek Olsen "pluto projector (melody)" - emptiness "En Familia" - Carlo Siliotto (unfortunately this song isn't on Spotify, but it was one of the two main songs for this chapter. You may find it on YT here) "Luna de Xelajú" - Gaby Moreno, Oscar Isaac (yes, we're bringing it back and you better have tissues ready 🤧) "Jacob and The Stone" - Emile Mosseri Masterlist (where you can find all my other fics, but most importantly, all fanart for NC 🥹) Thank you for reading!! I hope you enjoy!! 🫶🏼❤️
Part 17
The sight of sunlight streaming through the holographic blinds of your bedroom meets your eyes when you first wake up. Yawning, you stretch beneath the sheets, slowly waking up. You roll over on your side with a sigh, staring at the little pockets of sunshine on the floor.
The warmth under the covers keeps you there, anchored to the bed for a few more minutes until you finally decide to get out of bed to start the day. You slip on both gizmos; the one everyone has available to them and the new one Miguel gave you to test for him, removing the wristband you wear around the penthouse due to comfort and to avoid glitching since you’re not in your universe.
Trying not to think about something, or rather someone, you make your bed and get ready for the day. It’s only when you’re done with your bathroom routine that you decide to find out.
“Lyla?” you say.
“Hey - morning,” she says popping through your gizmo.
“Morning… Is Miguel…” you trail off.
“He’s already at HQ, yes,” she replies, fixing her glasses. “He left two hours ago.”
“Thanks.” With a frown, you make your way downstairs. You only check the kitchen out of curiosity, not because you’re particularly hungry. Knowing Miguel is already gone has decreased your appetite. Sure enough, you find a note on the counter from him, stating that he’s going to HQ. With a sigh, you slip out of the penthouse and head to your universe for your usual morning patrol, feeling down about the situation.
The problem is… Today is not the first day Miguel has gone to HQ so early. He’s been leaving the penthouse as early as 5am, unlike the past weeks and months since you’ve been living with him. Typically, the two of you leave together around the same time you’ve left the place today. You have coffee and sometimes even cook a full breakfast, but it hasn’t been like that for a few days.
You eventually arrive to HQ after your patrol, still feeling a heaviness around you. You do your tasks such as working on the weekly report, going on missions, and helping other spider members when and where it’s needed until it’s time for you to head to Miguel’s lab for your weekly organizing.
It’s still something you enjoy doing, especially even more now that Miguel is so much more open than when you first started organizing his lab two years ago. Even if you’re not conversing, the simple enjoyment of being in each other’s presence is satisfying to the two of you.
You look down at the boxes with food from the cafeteria and the drink carrier in your hands as you head there. You’re certain Miguel hasn’t had anything to eat, except maybe a coffee, if even that, so you’ve decided to get him something. Of course, being lunch time, you got him his favorite meal from the cafeteria: empanadas and other sides, along with a water and a coffee.
As expected, he thanks you with a small smile, but it’s one that doesn’t reach his eyes these days. You both eat in silence before you begin to work. As always, you make your rounds and check each surface, seeing what all there is to organize before you actually begin. You do this quietly, noticing that Miguel is too quiet. In fact, he’s been so much quieter the last few days, as if something has been weighting on his mind. Deeply. Terribly.
You’ve found him staring off into his screens several times over the last few days, his crimson eyes unblinking and focused on nothing in particular, lost in whatever has been plaguing his thoughts these days.
His smiles are distant and sad. He’s been unable to give you a true, genuine smile.
To everyone else, it may seem like a normal thing. Maybe they haven’t even noticed it, but you know better.
He’s far too quiet when cooking. His gaze is unfocused when he’s reading in the afternoons. He’s sought more solitude recently, heading upstairs to his room after dinner, and has been working out every day in the private gym in the penthouse building for several hours at a time.
You dared asked him yesterday if something was wrong, in a far more subtle way, of course.
“I’m alright, just tired,” he replied blinking back into focus, raising his hand to move screens around. He was back to working, or well, actually working since he was zoning out before you talked to him.
You continue to work silently now, taking note of the fact that even Lyla doesn’t chat with you like she normally does. She pops in and out, doing her tasks without any banter.
With a heavy feeling, you glance at Miguel. He’s on his platform, his back to you. Your eyes trace his broad shoulders, the tense stance.
Those shoulders.
They’ve carried too much for far too long.
What is plaguing his mind as of now? You can only wonder to yourself.
You carry on with your tasks, giving Miguel his time. You hope he’ll feel comfortable enough to share with you what’s been on his mind soon, or at least that his mood will improve because his recent disposition has reminded you of the early days when you first started organizing the lab. And, the truth is, that that worries and saddens you. It almost sends little alarms to your head about the possibility of maybe… Losing him.
You shake your head, trying to get rid of those thoughts. You don’t want to think about that possibility. The possibility of him taking a step back and deciding to shut everyone out again.
Including you.
But surely, that’s not it. Right?
You’ve thought about it the last few days. Did you do or said something that made him upset? Is there a chance that you did and he doesn’t want to bring it up to avoid hurting your feelings? You even wonder if maybe he’s… In need of space from you. Maybe having you around too much has become stressful, even suffocating. You debate that specifically, having no other explanation for his current behavior.
You’ve both tried to give each other space while at the penthouse, so it’s not like you spend every hour together in the evenings. During the days, you’re off doing other things either at HQ or at your universe. Yet, you still wonder if you being in his personal space, in his home, has become too much for him. Maybe you’ve pushed his boundaries, those you always try to respect, without even realizing it.
With a frown and a bad feeling in your chest, one you’ve carried with you over the last few days, you continue to work wordlessly until you’re done. You decide to leave the lab afterwards and give Miguel space, thinking maybe he truly needs a break from you.
The rest of the day goes by in a blur. Miguel stays a few more hours at HQ than he usually does these days. When he gets home, he reheats his own dinner, even though you offer to do it for him, a gesture he politely declines. In previous days, you talked with him for a bit. You’ve told him about your day, back in your universe when you’re off to do patrols, which you’ve continued to do. Just because you’re living in Miguel’s universe for the moment, doesn’t mean you’ve abandoned your dimension nor left your city defenseless.
You know you have Miguel’s technology to help connect with your two-way radio in case of emergencies, but even then, you like to do patrols. It was your promise to Peter, your Peter, after all. To keep your city safe, so you do.
You patrol your city, witnessing all sorts of things. One thing you’ve definitely learned from being Spider-Woman is that people do strange, funny, and sometimes even wholesome things when they believe no one is watching. If only they knew Spider-Woman is often watching from some rooftop.
It’s these stories you’ve told Miguel, in hopes of bringing some light to those sad eyes. You’ve succeeded but only during those short moments of time.
Whatever is on his mind takes the happiness out of them and his heart.
Today, instead of talking to him, you opt to remain silent as you clean the kitchen to at least give him company. Not long after, he excuses himself after washing his dishes, heading to his bedroom. Once you’re done cleaning the kitchen, you decide to lounge in your room, or Gabriel’s rather.
The penthouse is, once more, silent this evening, and for the first time, you feel an emptiness from it.
With a sigh, you stare out the window. The sight of the sun setting reminds you of Father’s Day and how you both sat on the rooftop that evening, enjoying the view before the sun dipped below the horizon, giving you a memory you’ll forever remember.
You touch your elbow, recalling how you ended up hurting yourself that evening in an attempt to hide the gifts you got for Miguel. Of course, it’s healed now like other injuries have in the past regardless of how big or small, physical or emotional.
Time heals all.
Usually.
You turn towards the closet where you hit yourself that day. Before you know it, you’ve opened the door and stare at the top of it. Your eyes find Peter’s box with all of his belongings, the same one you haven’t opened since you packed it.
And today is still not that day.
You close the door again and lean back on it, the sunset filtering through the window. Silently, you wonder if Miguel is watching it, too, from his own room.
You almost wish you could send him a message, but that would be insensitive and inappropriate when he’s in such a mood.
Are you watching the sunset, too?
You scoff to yourself. Yeah, not the best time.
Isn’t it beautiful? The colors - that shade of red.
It reminds you of Miguel’s eyes.
Shaking your head at your random thought, you sit down on the chair within your room and stare at the sunset some more. You remain like that until the sun fully disappears, still thinking about him and wishing you knew what is bothering him.
It’s a few minutes after the sun sets that you stand up and do a little organizing around your room. You know you’re only trying to distract yourself from Miguel but you accept the distraction happily. It’s the only way you can stop thinking about him and wondering what’s going on, analyzing your actions and words from the last few days before his mood changed. Your organizing halts half an hour later when you hear Miguel’s bedroom door open.
You frown, knowing you’re only able to hear it because he wants you to. He always goes out of his way to make as little noise as possible in case you’re taking a nap or simply to avoid disrupting you.
You don’t hear his footsteps however. You hardly do. For a man his size, you’d think you’d hear them, but no. He’s so silent.
For a moment, you wonder if he even left his room. You foolishly hope that he’s opened the door to give you a sign, one that means he’s better and ready to interact, but your hopes are shattered when you receive the notification from your gizmo.
“I’m at the gym.” - M
A part of you wants to change into workout clothes and go to the gym just to be near him, even if you keep your distance, but no.
You recognize when someone wants space - when someone wishes to be alone.
Miguel wants that now, so, you stay put in the penthouse instead, though you can’t find it in yourself to do something relaxing such as reading a book, or watching a movie or show. You don’t engage with any of your hobbies, old or new. Instead, you slip on headphones and do chores like laundry and vacuuming the living room’s rug. You wipe the ceiling to floor windows of both the living and dining area rooms, needing no ladder thanks to your spider abilities as you listen to music.
You go through an entire album, marking an hour. You play another one, focusing on other chores like drying the dishes and placing them back where they go. You adjust the couches and fix your blanket. You dust the bookcases and Miguel’s new photographs before you sweep the living room, using some advanced broom despite having robot vacuums to take care of it.
Back at the kitchen, you wipe the counters once more and then sweep that area, too. You even venture to the other living room, the one that’s for entertaining guests, and repeat the process all over again.
You keep listening to music, the hours tick by. It’s eventually eleven and Miguel is still at the gym. You only know he’s still there because Lyla tells you so. After all the chores and restlessness, you take a shower before going to bed at last, even though you simply lay there, staring at the ceiling - alone in the penthouse.
You grow restless staring at the four walls, so you eventually get up and leave your room. You stand in the hallway of the second floor, noticing the silence and darkness. It brings a thought to mind, but one you immediately push away.
After standing there for a few minutes, you finally head downstairs. Your steps are the only sound as you reach the living room where one single lamp remains on, one that you left on for Miguel for when he comes home. You also left small lamps on in the other living room and another one in the kitchen so he can see where he’s going when he comes back.
It’s past midnight when you turn to the windows and stare out at Nueva York. You bring your hands to your arms, hugging yourself with a deep sigh.
Is Miguel even coming back to the penthouse tonight? Or, will he stay at the gym all night?
Minutes tick by as you keep your gaze on the city, waiting.
You wait, and wait. And wait.
“Lyla?” you break the silence several minutes later.
“Yeah?” Lyla appears next to you, her voice gentle to avoid startling you.
“Can you please turn off all the lights?”
At that, Lyla turns to you, a frown on her face as she processes the odd request. “Turn off the lights? Why?”
“Please,” you whisper, still hugging yourself and staring out the windows.
Despite her confusion and the urge to question and deny your request, Lyla does as you’ve asked. She turns off every single light, leaving the penthouse in utter darkness, save for some spaces that are somewhat illuminated by the outside.
You turn away from the windows and stare at the living room and the rest of the penthouse. Everything is dark. And you’re alone.
Your thought from earlier comes back as you take in your surroundings.
This is what it’s like for Miguel - what it was like back then when he lost Gabriella. All alone, sitting in darkness and silence with so many running emotions all on his own.
“This is what it was like,” you whisper.
“What was what like?” Lyla asks, still hovering near you.
“Miguel. After everything that happened with Gabriella.”
Lyla nods, now understanding what’s going on, recalling those nights. “Yes, this is what the penthouse looked and felt like on those nights - and there was something heavy that lingered in the space. I don’t like to think about those nights.”
“I understand,” you whisper, imagining what Lyla has shared.
She nods, still staring at the darkness. A frown is visible on her face. It bothers her to see you like this. “I’m turning the lights on.”
“Is Miguel still at the gym?”
“Yeah. He’s been working out, almost nonstop for hours.”
You nod. He’s been trying to distract himself with that. From what? You don’t know.
”Lyla?”
“Yes?”
“… I know I shouldn’t ask…”
“You want to know what’s happening.”
“Yes.”
Lyla sighs, or replicates doing so anyway as you turn to face her at last, still hugging yourself. She sits down and adjusts her heart shape glasses. “I’m honestly surprised Miguel hasn’t told you, but I suppose he still has some healing to do despite all the progress he’s done in the last year,” she says, staring at you. “I guess it’s why he still finds it hard to talk about her.”
Her.
“Gabriella. It’s about Gabby,” you state.
“Yes. Tomorrow…” Lyla sighs again. “Tomorrow, or well, I guess today, considering the time now, would’ve been… her birthday.”
Suddenly everything clicks into place.
Lyla watches the way your shoulders slump, the realization hitting you, and how your entire face changes to one of understanding and pain.
“Miguel,” you sigh, understanding everything now. No wonder he’s been so different lately, he’s been thinking about Gabby’s upcoming birthday for days. Probably thinking about what age she’d be turning today. Now more than earlier, you feel like going to look for him, to comfort him somehow, to be near him to offer at least your presence, but you’re reminded that Miguel doesn’t want that. At least, you don’t believe so. If he did, he’d be here in the penthouse, not at the gym alone.
“You should get some rest,” Lyla suggests. “I know that’s probably the last thing you want to do now but… Miguel would feel far more guilty if he knows he’s been keeping you up. I’m certain he already feels upset with himself for how different he’s been the last few days.”
“I don’t think I can sleep, but I know I can’t go and look for him,” you reply.
“No, that would upset him even more. He doesn’t like disturbing you, or rather worrying you.”
“Right,” you respond, even though you wish to run and find him right now. “I’ll be in my room. Please make sure those lights remain on. I don’t want him to come back to…”
“Darkness.”
You nod.
“The lights will remain on, no worries,” she reassures you. “Try to sleep a bit. I’ll keep an eye out for him, too. If something comes up, I’ll wake you up.”
Lyla “walks” you to your room, feeling the need to look after you. You’re after all, her boss’s best friend. Looking after you is her looking after Miguel, one of her integral designs.
You settle down on the bed, covering your body with the bed sheets, your mind running wild with thoughts. Lyla wishes you a good night after several minutes of her simply hanging out around the room, knowing you’re not much for conversation now that you know the reason for Miguel’s current behavior, before she flickers away.
Alone, you’re back to staring at the ceiling and the walls in an empty penthouse. It’s close to two in the morning when you hear subtle footsteps. They slow down in front of your bedroom, stopping by the door.
For a moment, you wonder if Miguel will come in, deciding to talk to you, even if he thinks he’ll have to wake you up. Instead, you hear a soft sigh before the footsteps continue, fading once Miguel enters his bedroom.
You’re not sure if Miguel gets any sleep, even though you’re tempted to ask Lyla. A part of you refuses to continue invading his privacy by having Lyla tell you what he’s up to, so you don’t. You stay up for a while, staring at the walls, tossing and turning. You eventually doze off despite wanting to remain awake, waking up at six only to be told by Lyla that Miguel has already been at HQ for an hour.
Tired, you start the day knowing what today is.
Gabby’s birthday.
As you move about the penthouse, you wonder how old she would’ve turned today. The few images you have of her pop into your mind along with the few videos Miguel has of her - almost like a movie, and one too short, like her life.
You ask Lyla what Miguel has done. Apparently, he’s been working on data since he showed up.
Downstairs, you find a sticky note on the counter. Ever since you began living with him, you started the habit of leaving him sticky notes around the place, something Miguel has begun to reciprocate. Like the previous day, he’s left you another one today.
I’m at HQ. - Miguel
You make yourself a coffee and gulp it down in a few drinks, needing the caffeine. You debate doing your morning patrol, but eventually decide to do it anyway, thinking it’ll give you time to think. Swinging around your city and watching from rooftops on your own, you question whether you should talk to Miguel, let him know that you’re aware of what today is, but you quickly change your mind.
You imagine Miguel might not be pleased to know that Lyla told you, so you decide not to say anything, at least for now. You’ll have to pretend that you don’t know the reason he’s hurting.
Back at HQ, you walk around the building and check on things, trying to distract yourself. It’s nine in the morning when you decide to grab some breakfast from the cafeteria for both Miguel and you. You’re unsure of what the day or Miguel will be like when it’s Gabby’s birthday, but you definitely know that you want to look after him, even if it’s only by making sure he’s eating properly.
With breakfast in your hands, you begin to head to the lab with hope. You’ve only taken about twenty steps when you receive a notification through your gizmo from Jess, which you quickly realize was sent to everyone.
“For all questions or concerns, direct yourself with me. Miguel is busy. Do not disturb him.” - Jess
Lowering your arm, you wonder if that message applies to you, too.
Standing in the middle of a corridor, hands occupied with food, it suddenly feels a lot like the time you entered Miguel’s lab and found him overwhelmed, upset, but more than anything, hurt at the discovery of hidden photos and videos of Gabby and his wife by Lyla. You recall the way it felt to have stepped into the lab and you wonder now if that’s what awaits for you because you quickly make up your mind.
You’re ignoring Jess’s message.
Two years ago, you would've simply oblige and made no questions. You would’ve try not to think about your boss and wonder what he did all day, wondered if anyone dropped off food for him, or if he even left the lab in his own discrete ways to eat and drink something, to nourish his body. You would've hoped that he'd at least let either Jess or Peter B. check on him.
Two years ago, you wouldn't had done it yourself nor pushed his boundaries because you were a simple member, not one of his close ones.
Two years ago, that would’ve been the end of it, even if you silently worried about Miguel from a distance.
Today? Things are different.
Two years ago Miguel and you hardly talked, hardly interacted.
Now, you're best friends, and best friends don't leave each other alone. They don't give up on you. They keep trying just like Miguel said Harry and your other former friends from a lifetime ago should’ve with you.
With a determined nod, you continue to make your way to Miguel's lab. As usual, there's other spider members walking around. You catch a few checking their gizmos, making you wonder if they’re reading Jess’s message regarding Miguel. You nod at a few, at least at those you're not too familiar with or who might be new. To those you do know and have more of a bond with, you give them a quick and simple greeting, not opening for conversation, not when you want to see Miguel already.
You turn the corner and it’s only thanks to your spidey senses going off that you don’t run into -
“Ben,” you say, recognizing him instantly.
Ben Reilly's eyebrows shoot up, surprise visible on his face. He shifts slightly. “Y/N… Hey.” He offers a smile, scratching his neck.
“Hey,” you greet him back, returning a small smile even though you're in a rush. “I'll see you around!” you say, walking around him, determined to reach your destination.
“Hey, Y/N!” Ben calls out, turning to face you quickly. “I was wondering if I could talk to you about something…?”
You turn to face him, walking backwards with both your hands occupied with the food and drinks.
“Of course. Can we talk …” you trail off. “Later? I'm in the middle of something. I'm sorry,” you apologize softly.
He sighs subtly, his shoulders slumping just barely before he fixes his excellent posture. “I understand. I'll look for you later today.”
“Alright. That sounds good. I'll see you later, Ben. Careful if you go on missions!” You offer him a quick smile before you turn away once more and hurry off, leaving Ben behind.
He sighs again, running a hand through his hair that earns him a few glances of interest from other spider members. He watches you become smaller and smaller as you retrace steps you take each day.
Everyone knows where you're going and who you're seeking: the one person they were told to not disturb today.
That person’s door is closed to them but not for a few people like Jess Drew, Peter B. Parker, and now you.
He huffs and turns away, heading to the training sector for a workout session to sweat his frustrations away. He turns for one more glance, seeing you disappear into the elevator and heading for Miguel's floor.
You reach the lab doors, wondering if you’ll be turned away. A few seconds later, relief washes over you when Lyla confirms, after asking Miguel, that you can go in.
As far as Miguel knows, you have no idea what today is, so you offer him breakfast, which he thankfully accepts. You both sit on his elevated platform and eat in silence, legs dangling from it. As you eat, you remind yourself that you agreed to saying nothing, to pretend like you don’t know. You stay true to that even though your mind is a mess, even though you want to do more than just offer Miguel food.
However, you say nothing as you eat. Even after breakfast, you reveal nothing. You don’t want Miguel to feel pressured to say anything just because you know, behind his back. No, if he says anything, you hope it’s because Miguel is ready and comfortable doing so.
So, you stick with him for a while, working silently from your own area in the lab now knowing that his behavior has nothing to do with something you may have done or said, or your mere presence as you were worrying about yesterday. At some point you leave him because you’re needed by Jess, so you do so reluctantly.
For lunch time, it’s the same with the small difference that you both make small talk. The hours tick by and when you look at your gizmo, it’s suddenly three in the afternoon. Due to Jess’s warning, no one sends Miguel messages except for Jess, nor does anyone show up to the lab. It’s just Miguel, Lyla, and you.
You yourself get a few messages from the spider gang, asking if Miguel is alright and why you’ve been hiding at his lab all day. You reassure them both Miguel and you are physically alright. You don’t know what else to say. It’s not your place to share something so sensitive and personal, especially when you’re not supposed to even know.
Standing up, you stretch quietly, remembering that Ben Reilly wanted to talk to you. You figure you should make yourself available at least for an hour. He hasn’t sent you any messages, so you wonder if he’s already aware that you’ve been at Miguel’s lab for the majority of the day, hence the reason for the lack of messages from his end. You pack your things silently, shutting the laptop and fixing the area, which catches Miguel’s attention.
On his platform, he turns to look at you. Seeing you pack up makes him realize you’re probably not coming back because if you were, you would be leaving your desk as it was. Watching you push the chair under the desk only solidifies the fact.
“Heading… out?” Miguel asks, starting the conversation for the first time in days.
It catches you by surprise, so much it’s clearly expressed on your face. It immediately pains Miguel, to see how surprised you are that he’s talking to you. His hands close into fists at his sides, cursing mentally.
“… Yes,” you reply, picking up your empty cup. “I’m heading out.”
Miguel nods, his expression neutral but quickly morphing into a pained one.
“Migs…?” you say softly, quickly noticing his expression changing.
“Mierda [shit],” Miguel whispers, looking away and unable to stop himself from thinking he’s undeserving of your nickname. A nickname, or a term of endearment, is a gesture from someone who cares about you, and here he is, hurting you with his behavior. Seeing the surprise look on your face just seconds ago solidifies that. Miguel’s guilt only intensifies as the look on your face flashes in his mind. You don’t hurt those that you care for and care about you, but now he has hurt you to some degree.
“Miguel?” you try again.
“I’m - I’m sorry,” Miguel says, exhaling deeply with a remorseful tone. “I’m … sorry. I didn’t mean to.”
Hearing Miguel say that throws all ideas about leaving out the window. You place the cup down and make your way to him, his head hanging low.
“Miguel,” you say once more, gently.
“I’m sorry,” he repeats, lifting his head enough so you can see his face.
“Don’t,” you say. “Don’t apologize.”
“You deserve an apology,” Miguel replies. “I’ve been - I haven’t been in a good mood… I need to tell you something.”
“You don’t have to, Miguel,” you counter gently.
“I do. You deserve an explanation,” Miguel continues with a sigh, shaking his head in frustration at himself. “I saw the surprise on your face from me talking to you. You shouldn’t be surprised by that, but you are because I’ve been - a jerk.”
You sigh, standing on his platform. “You’re not a jerk, Miguel.” You state firmly. “I… I was wondering what was the matter,” you pause, wanting to be honest. “Don’t be mad at Lyla but… She told me a few hours ago. Some time before you returned to the penthouse this morning from the gym.”
“Lyla,” Miguel says, not even upset. “A part of me is relieved you already know… I should’ve told you sooner, but I couldn’t…” Miguel shakes his head, his eyes closed. He gulps softly. “It’s her birthday,” Miguel whispers, finally sharing from his own lips what has been on his mind all these past few days. ”Today is Gabby’s birthday.”
Nodding, you take a step closer. “I know,” you start. “I know it’s her birthday…” you reply, not knowing what else to say right now. To be honest, you weren’t expecting Miguel to tell you today. “I know it must be hard to share that,” you add softly.
Miguel sighs gently, nodding. “May I be honest?”
“Yeah, of course,” you whisper.
“I don’t want to be here right now.”
Your eyebrows furrow and you’re filled with worry instantly, for a second thinking that Miguel means something else, something much sadder, darker.
“I want to be home,” he goes on, clarifying. “I don’t want to be here, trying to distract myself from my thoughts about her.”
You sigh in relief, nodding. “We can go home, if you want?”
Miguel nods, wanting now more than ever to leave his lab. “Lyla, please let Jess know I’m going home,” Miguel says before correcting himself. “Let her know we’re both going home, dulzura and me.”
-♡-
Back at home, Miguel takes a shower while you begin to prepare an early dinner. You know that there’s essentially nothing in the whole multiverse that can lessen Miguel’s hurt today, but you hope that a homemade meal will sooth his heart just a little.
When he comes back downstairs, showered and dressed in lounging clothes, you fix him a plate before joining him. He doesn’t say anything else about Gabby, which you respect. You’re grateful he’s at least told you about Gabby’s birthday and that you’re both home eating together instead of him staying after hours at HQ before coming home and hiding at the gym.
Even after dinner and cleaning the kitchen, you’re unsure of what to do. You search for silent cues from Miguel. Does he want to be alone or is he okay with you being near him? You receive your answer when Miguel asks if you want to watch TV together, a question that leaves you a little surprised to start with, but one you answer with a “yes.”
You sit together in the living room. As always, you’re both on your respective couches.
Miguel watches the TV, or tries to. His attention is not fully on it for obvious reasons. Gabby is always on his mind, along with Gabriel, but due to her birthday coming up, she’s been even more so. He’s been thinking about it for days, about his little girl and how old she’d be turning today. It pains him so much, knowing she’s not here. He’s been trying to distract himself with work at HQ and then working out at the gym, going for hours so he doesn’t think about the fact that Gabby isn’t here - that she won’t be celebrating her birthday like she should.
He turns his head to look at the windows, the sun setting now. He’s reminded of yesterday when he was in his room after dinner. He found himself watching the sunset from there and in that short amount of time while the sun dipped, he thought about you. He heard you entering your room shortly after him and he wondered if you were watching it, too. He typed the message but before sending it, he changed his mind.
Miguel turns to look at you now, sitting on the couch, keeping him company. His guilt washes over him again at the sight. You denied it earlier but he’s such a jerk for the way he’s been behaving, there’s no way to deny it, at least not in his eyes.
He sighs. He promised he was going to try, didn’t he? He promised for Gabby and Gabriel. He was going to try to heal, to move forward.
It’s that thought that compels Miguel to stand up from the couch, telling you that he’d be back before heading upstairs.
You simply nod and stay in place, hoping Miguel truly does come back. To your relief, Miguel returns a few minutes later, holding a guitar.
You recognize it instantly from Miguel’s ofrenda [altar] for Día de los Muertos [Day of the Dead] as Miguel approaches you, who then takes a seat on the ground next to you. You join him a few seconds later without a doubt, watching him hold the guitar carefully.
“It’s the only thing… The only physical reminder I have left of Gabby. It was pure… Coincidence that I still have it,” Miguel shares, staring at the guitar. “A day before her universe collapsed, she asked me to fix the strings for her, so I brought it to HQ to work on it. Unfortunately, there were a lot of things happening that day. It was one thing or another. Every time I lifted it to begin working on it, something or someone would pop up and prevent me from doing so. I ended up forgetting it at HQ that day. With so much happening, I left it in my lab. It was much later when I remembered it. That last night. When I got back to her universe just in time for school to be out, she didn’t ask for it. She was so tired from the school day, she didn’t remember it. Not even later in the afternoon when she was done with school work and was free to do what she wanted, whether that was coloring, or playing with her toys, or practicing the guitar. It was me who remembered it when I tucked her in for the night.”
Miguel brushes his fingers over the strings, gently. “I told myself I’d fix the guitar as soon as I got to the lab, so I could take it back to her… So I could hear her play it in the afternoon the next day.” He shakes his head in disbelief. “I had no idea that would be the last night… ever.”
Miguel doesn’t know why, but suddenly he feels like talking about that last night. He’s shared with you the last morning he spent with Gabby, just hours before one of the worst moments of his life took place.
“I used to think… After losing Gabriel, that nothing could ever hurt me as much. That there was nothing much worse that could happen to me. Nothing could ever, make me feel so much sorrow, grief, pain - and I was wrong. I never thought that I’d become a dad,” Miguel states, looking over the guitar, at the stickers that Gabby placed on it. “I never thought that I’d experience that, much less the loss of a child. I think - I know - a part of me always believed I was unworthy of such thing. I wasn’t meant for that life. Wasn’t meant to experience it. I was destined to be alone,” he continues. “And then she happened, and she - she was and continues to be one of the most beautiful things I’ve had the privilege of experiencing.”
Miguel shifts slightly, knowing you’re listening to him, like always.
“That last night, my wife and I cooked dinner. It was a normal evening, like any other. Gabby did her homework, got to play with her dolls afterwards. She had a lot, you know, but her favorites were the doctor and scientist dolls. Part of it was because they looked like her, and another part because of their professions.” Miguel smiles slightly, a sad smile. “In the short time I had with her, I always told her so. How they were mini versions of her in the future because she was so bright, so smart. I’d always tell her that she could do and be anything she wanted. I never once dampened her dreams nor her aspirations. I wanted her to know that she could be a scientist, or she could be a teacher, or she could be a bakery owner. It didn’t matter. As long as she wanted it and worked towards it, she could achieve anything, but I digress,” Miguel says, realizing he’s all over the place.
“She played with her dolls and showered afterwards. I arranged her school stuff for the morning. I always helped her prep her outfit the night before to save time in the morning, and made sure her backpack was set with her assistance to help her build responsibility, too, though I never struggled with that. She was so responsible for her age. She watched some TV that evening, and then, it was time for bed. I never missed bedtime,” Miguel continues, a fond smile on his face, his fingers splayed over the guitar.
“I loved tucking her in, reading to her. I’d climb into the bed to read to her sometimes. It was always a struggle, of course, and my back would be tense in the mornings, but it was worth it. So worth it. What I’d give… to repeat those moments. To be back in that cheerful bedroom and have her ask questions while seeking the comfort of her father… of her daddy.” Miguel sighs, thinking about that. How his heart would swell with a pure happiness unlike any other when she called him “dad” or “daddy.”
“I read to her that night and soon, she was drifting off. Sus ojitos [her little eyes; little is used as endearment, not meaning she had small eyes]… Her little eyes would flutter, trying to fight off the sleep to keep talking about the book. She’d blink real hard,” Miguel says with a soft chuckle, inhaling deeply and shakily. “Thinking it’d help her stay awake longer, but my little girl, she eventually doze off into a peaceful slumber with no worries. I was grateful for that, you know?” Miguel says turning to look at you. “There is no doubt in my mind that the original Miguel of that dimension was grateful for that, too. Gabby didn’t know what it was like to be ripped away from a peaceful dream because of your parents’ arguing in the living room. Nor did she have to worry about a younger sibling coming to her room to seek her comfort. I was always grateful that Miguel, the original of that dimension, had succeeded in providing such a safe space for her. And I was set on doing the same for her. I succeeded, too. So… she dozed off. I held her close,” Miguel whispers, recalling how it felt to hold his sleeping daughter in his arms.
“I remember thinking, ‘just a few more minutes. One day she’ll be all grown up, she may not want her dad’s affection anymore because she finds it embarrassing or uncool.’ So, I did. I stayed there with her. Now I wonder, if something deep inside me felt the danger coming. If I had sensed it somehow and I wanted to hold on to that moment - to her - just a little longer because something in me knew... knew that that would be the very last time I’d ever get to hold her like that, in such calm manner because the next day would be the very last time I held her, but under much different circumstances. That it’d be outside the comfort of her home with hundreds of frightened people running around us, seeking a safety that I couldn’t give to them because I didn’t understand what was happening.”
“Miguel,” you whisper gently, knowing to this day he blames himself for the collapse of Gabriella’s universe despite there being no evidence of such thing.
“I know,” he whispers back. “You’re too kind to me, so you don’t think I had something to do with it, but… my brain tells me so.”
“We still don’t know, you know that. There’s no evidence that suggests you did. Just because you were there, doesn’t mean you were responsible. It doesn’t make sense when so many of us have done the same, and yet those universes are still… here.” You inhale softly, hating the fact that Miguel still blames himself. You know it’s something that will take him time to let go, maybe until there’s further evidence that suggests otherwise. In Miguel’s mind, it’s not ‘innocent until proven guilty.’
It’s guilty until proven innocent.
“It probably doesn’t mean anything,” you start. “Because I know how these feelings can be rooted deep in us, despite any comforting words… but I don’t think you had anything to do with it, Miguel.”
He looks at you then, the pain in his eyes visible. “But what if it was me? I took everything from her. If I had stayed away - her universe might still be intact. She would be alive. She’d be celebrating today like she ought to,” Miguel says with desperation in his tone. “I ruined it. I should’ve never gone. I should’ve let things carry on like they were supposed to,” he insists.
“Miguel,” you say his name again but this time not in a whisper. You speak firmly, evenly. You almost lift your hand to place it on his shoulder but you remember not to. “I’m not saying that only because you’re my best friend,” you continue. “I wholeheartedly believe that you weren’t the cause. You’re not responsible for it. There’s something we’ve overlooked, the real cause. I have no doubt one day we’ll discover it, and it’ll show you that you were not at fault.”
“But what if I was?” he repeats. “She could’ve been alive today.”
“I’ve told you I don’t believe you are responsible. You know that, Miguel, but maybe there’s a chance she might have still been alive, if it wasn’t for the true cause of her universe’s collapse.” Next to you, Miguel huffs in frustration, as if he’s upset at your relentless faith that he had nothing to do with it. It frustrates you, the fact that he thinks you’re just trying to sooth his guilt. “Do you think it’s my fault Peter… passed away?”
That makes Miguel turn before he lowers the guitar to his lap. “What - no, of course not, dulzura. It wasn’t your fault,” he says, brows furrowed.
“Are you only saying that to make me feel better? Because we’re best friends?”
“Dulzura… No, of course not. It wasn’t your fault, and I mean that.”
“Then, can you believe that when I tell you that I don’t think you are responsible, I don’t say it only to make you feel better? Can you believe that I say it because I really do believe it?” you ask, holding his gaze with such a serious face that leaves no room for doubt or questioning.
Miguel blinks, keeping his gaze on you for several seconds. His gaze searches your face, so serious. He silently decides he doesn’t like such look on you - he prefers to see you smile, prefers the brightness in your eyes when you’re happy, when you’re in good spirits, but that serious face… Miguel sees you truly believe what you’re saying. You’re not only saying it to make him feel better, to reassure him, and lessen his guilt and pain. At last, he nods slowly.
“I can… a part of me can, but another part of me still feels an incredible guilt that I swear will never fade, no matter how much time passes,” he states softly. “I think about what she could’ve had, where she could’ve been. What she’d be in the future, the amazing things she could’ve done, and experienced.”
You sigh softly and nod. With deceased loved ones, there’s always those questions, especially when they pass away too soon, when there was so much for them to live and experience. You yourself have thought about Peter and all the things he never had the opportunity to experience nor accomplish. Then, there’s also the things that he didn’t even get a chance to wish for, or dream about. By now, he may have accomplished all his previous goals and dreams, and he might have been on to newer ones, but you’ll never know now. Still, you know that for however long he was alive, he lived a good life despite the few tragedies he experienced early on in life. He was a happy man, and he loved and was loved deeply.
“I know it’s a different age with Peter. He had the opportunity to live more but… That always hurt me to think about, too,” you admit. “About all the goals and dreams he had, about the ones he didn’t even get to think of.” You pause, looking at your hand for a few seconds. “A wise man once said, that seven years count the same as seventy, even seven hundred.” Looking up again, you find Miguel’s crimson eyes on the same hand you were just staring at before he lifts his gaze to yours. He raises an eyebrow, wondering, so you continue.
“Someone may live to ninety years and we think, ‘Wow. They’re so lucky.’ We imagine they lived and experienced so much, but that’s not always the case. Someone who only got to live nine or twenty-three years old may have lived more than the ninety year old person has. Just because we’ve had more years to live doesn’t mean we’ve actually lived, not for all of them,” you say softly, looking away. “I didn’t live for many years. I stopped when I lost Peter.”
Hearing you say that breaks Miguel’s heart, brings him so much pain.
“It’s probably… stupid and maybe even cringe,” you say with a smile and shrug, which for some reason pains Miguel even more. “My heart functioned, and I was alive, but I didn’t feel like it. I didn’t actually live over that time. And I didn’t even realize until much later, when I joined the Spider Society, how dull I had truly become. There’s still moments, even now, when I realize that all over again. Like, when I look at sunsets and realize I looked at sunsets during those times but I wasn’t really looking at them… if that makes sense. It was as if I was looking through a screen, someone else’s life. And then, I started to learn to live again. So… I’m sure you know where I’m getting at with this,” you say, looking at him again, at last.
“Gabby may have only lived for nine years but every single one of them counted as living. Her biological father, from what you’ve shared, loved her so much and gave her a safe and comfortable life with so much love, which you continue when you stepped up to be her dad. In her nine years of life… She knew and most importantly, felt, the important things. Unconditional love. Comfort. Happiness. Safety. That’s more than some ninety, or even forty year old have ever experienced despite being alive for several decades… because they haven’t lived. I wish Peter… Gabby, Gabriel - were here now. That they were able to still be here and live longer. That wish will never fade, not truly, I don’t think, but personally?” You offer Miguel a smile. “I’m thankful Peter knew and felt all those things - that he was able to experience them when so many don’t.”
With that, you look away and lean back on the couch, allowing Miguel to either absorb your words, or reject them.
“She was loved,” Miguel states almost a minute later of silence. “She was so loved. By both her biological dad, and then me. I’m grateful for that,” he whispers. “I’m grateful she knew love, kindness. That she knew happiness, comfort, and safety. Like every child should.” Whispering that, Miguel sighs. His head lowers to look at the guitar, his mind flooded with memories of Gabby being happy. He can’t help but feel a new wave of guilt at the fact that on a day that she’d be very happy on, he’s feeling this way.
Like a bolt of lightning, he’s reminded of Gabriel suddenly, of his words, to be exact, from his dream a year ago. He asked Miguel to live for them. Then, there’s also your words from a few weeks ago when you witnessed one of his nightmares for the first time. You said to honor them - to live how they would live if they were here.
Thinking about that, Miguel clears his throat. “You always bake a cake for Peter on his birthday.”
“I do,” you reply, looking over at him with curiosity. You didn’t expect the sudden change of conversation.
“You do it because that’s what you would’ve done if he was still around.”
“Yes.”
Miguel nods, thinking. He’s never bought or baked a cake for Gabriel or his mother. He’s never celebrated their birthdays after they passed away. That includes Gabriella.
He looks down at his gizmo. It’s not too late… Surely a bakery is still open. Maybe they still have cakes.
“Miguel?” you ask softly, noticing him looking at his gizmo.
“I… I think I want to buy her a cake,” he says looking up at you.
“You… do?”
Miguel nods, rapidly realizing he really wants to do this. “Yes. I want to. She deserves it.” He places the guitar on the coffee table and begins to stand up. “I’m going to check the bakeries and see if I can find a cake she’d like. Maybe I’ll have luck.”
Noticing Miguel begin to stand up, you stand up, too, and before you can stop yourself, you make an offer. “I can bake her one, if you want.”
Miguel freezes, looking at you. “You?… Really?” he asks, his entire face softening and lighting up. His tone is gentle, filled with awe and wonder, as if you’ve just made him the greatest offer in history.
With a nod, you smile and reply. “Yes, really. We can bake one together, if you want to help. You know I love baking, so I have almost anything I could need to bake a cake. Just say the word, Migs,” you answer softly.
The nickname, your smile, and offer brings a smile to Miguel’s face. He nods slowly, standing completely now. “Si, por favor [yes, please]. That would mean so much to me… and Gabby.”
You gesture to the kitchen. “C’mon.”
Miguel follows after you, carrying Gabby’s guitar, so precious to him.
You set the oven to preheat, already knowing how to use it since you’ve baked a lot at the penthouse since you’ve lived here. You have Miguel decide the shape, so you find the round cake mold when he politely requests a round one. He retrieves the mixer and the few ingredients he knows will be used, letting you tell him what else is needed so he can help.
As you stated, you have a little of everything so you give him plenty of options for the type of bread, filling, and icing.
Miguel quickly decides the filling should be out of strawberries since Gabby loved them, apparently they were her favorite fruit. For the actual bread, he decides to go with chocolate - it was also a favorite of little Gabby.
Once that’s settled, you begin working with the help of Miguel though your years of baking do not require it. You let him though because you know it’s special to him. It’s for his little girl, after all. So you let him pour the ingredients into the mixing bowl while you work on other things towards the cake.
The more you move through the process together, the more Miguel slowly begins to tell you about Gabby. It’s as if his mind is flooded with random little memories all fighting for his attention. You listen intently to every word, smiling and chuckling with him when he tells you something funny she did or said once.
He’s already shared some of the moments he talks about, but you still listen to him, noticing the glimmer of happiness in his eyes while talking about his Gabby.
As you bake and Miguel shares with you all these moments, you picture them in your head. You see Miguel carrying Gabby on his shoulders, her toothy smile on display. You see Gabby giggling when Miguel accidentally let go of the hair tie and it snapped against his finger while doing her hair. There’s Miguel making Gabby Choco Milk in her favorite cup, and the one time Gabby asked where babies came from out of nowhere, which Miguel didn’t know how to answer in the moment, so he told her he’d find that out and let her know later on.
“What about music?” you ask softly when you pull the pan out of the oven a while later. “What did she like? You’ve mentioned her favorite song before… ‘Luna de Xelajú’, but what else did she like?”
Miguel smiles softly at the fact that you remember her favorite song. “That was her favorite song, yes. She liked other songs, of course. Different genres and artists of all ages. She even liked Joan Sebastian,” Miguel says amused. “She sang some of his songs like she understood matters of the heart already. Then, there were some that always made her dance, like this song called ‘No rompas mi corazón’ - there’s a dance for it. It’s played at parties sometimes,” Miguel shares, not sure if you’re familiar with it.
“It’s something like this,” Lyla says popping out of nowhere, showing you a video of people dancing at a party.
“I know of it,” you say with a smile, not surprised that Lyla has made an appearance. She tends to pop up sometimes out of nowhere when both Miguel and you least expect her. “So Gabby danced to it?”
“Yeah, she’d hear it and it’s like her feet were tingling to move. She’d get so excited every time it came on,” he says with a smile. “She’d dance and look at me and say ‘¡mira, mira, papá! [look, look, papa]’… But there was one artist she absolutely adored, her favorite artist. Selena.”
“Selena?” you ask, surprised. Of course you know of her. “A version of her existed in Gabby’s universe?”
“Yes, but unlike in so many universes where her life is cut short, this version peacefully passed away before Gabby was born out of old age. She had a large and happy family. Gabby told me so,” Miguel says. “She knew a lot about her.”
“What was her favorite song of hers?”
Miguel smiles. “It was ‘Baila Esta Cumbia’ - she’d dance to it, too.”
“Do you want me to… play it?” Lyla asks Miguel while you work on the cake, wondering what his answer will be. It might be too soon for him.
Miguel stays silent for several seconds, thinking. It’s been so long since he’s heard the song, or any of the music that Gabby used to enjoy listening.
“Lyla can always turn it off,” you offer softly as you work, glancing at him for a few seconds before continuing to work on the cake. “If you decide to.”
He hums softly at your words, drumming his fingers against his thigh. At last, he nods to Lyla and a few seconds later, the upbeat song begins to play, filling the kitchen and lifting the mood.
Miguel watches you work on the cake, his finger tapping against his thigh to the beat, thinking about Gabby.
“If only she were here now,” he mumbles softly. He wonders if she’d still like the song, or if she’d have a new favorite song by Selena, if she’d still even be a fan of Selena to begin with. He wonders, just like he wonders about other things, what her music taste would be like now.
He leans forward, resting his elbows on the counter and interlocking his fingers to press against his forehead, looking at the counter surface for a few seconds before closing his eyes and just listening to the song.
He can pretend for a few seconds that she’s here, that she’s singing happily to the song and doing her little dances. He hears the ‘eh, eh, eh,’ part and recalls how she’d sing that part, clapping her small hands to it.
He uncovers his face, lowering his hands to the counter. “You heard that part? The ‘eh, eh, eh?’ She used to clap along with it,” Miguel shares, smiling softly. “She was always so elated when it played. It cheered her up.”
Miguel makes it without crying for the rest of the song, so Lyla deems it safe to play other songs she thinks are appropriate for what could’ve been Gabby’s birthday party. She keeps it light with the music as you work on the cake while Miguel shares other tidbits of Gabby.
After some time, you add the last candle before turning it around so Miguel can see it, his eyes softening immediately at the finished cake.
“What do you think?” you ask him as his eyes take in every detail about it.
He nods, eyebrows knitted gently before he turns his attention to you, smiling tenderly. “It’s… Beautiful, dulzura,” he states softly, his tone full of sincerity. “It’s so Gabby. She would’ve loved it, I know that. Thank you, thank you, thank you,” he whispers accepting the cake as you hand it to him with a warm smile, happy that Miguel likes the cake.
You find a lighter and reach Miguel’s side, not worried about washing dishes since Miguel got most of them while you were working to help, and even then, neither of you would’ve cared in order to celebrate.
At last, you both look at it, at the completed cake, sitting side by side while music still plays in the background.
Miguel continues to observe it, admiring your work with the details like the little bees and the sprinkle of lilac flowers. He doesn’t fail to notice the color you used to write ‘Happy Birthday, Gabby!!’ with - the color Selena was most known for, that rich purple.
“She…” Miguel starts, his voice soft and quiet, as he thinks about her. About Gabby. “She would’ve loved it.” He whispers, a knot forming in his throat. “Thank you - she would’ve loved it, so much.”
“The bees and her favorite color,” you say. “I thought she might have.”
“She would. She really would,” Miguel replies lifting a hand to his face. He tries to be subtle about it, but from your peripheral vision, you can see the action, the way he wipes at his eye.
You feel tears yourself but for Miguel, you try to stay calm, try to be strong. However, seeing someone you care for so much cry has never made it easy. A few tears pool in your eyes, blurring your vision. Biting your bottom lip because you feel it quivering, you dab at your eyes gently, trying to make the gesture subtle, too.
“Do you want me to…?” you ask raising the lighter.
Miguel turns, sniffling. Noticing the lighter, he nods. “… Please,” he whispers.
Miguel doesn’t need to say anything else. His simple response is all you need, so you lit the candles carefully, watching the cake come to life with their flickering.
You both stare at it, unbeknownst to either of you, imagining the same thing: a Gabriella standing behind the counter, her eyes lit up with happiness, her face illuminated by the gentle glow of the candles. There’s a beautiful, toothy smile on her face as she listens to the people around her sing happy birthday before she gets to make a wish and blow the candles.
You can imagine Miguel taking pictures from the very back to avoid blocking anyone's views due to his height with a happy, warm, and sweet smile on his face to see his little girl turn one year older.
Then, there's Gabby looking at the camera still smiling once she has made her wish, guests cheering and clapping.
And maybe, just to keep up with traditions - Miguel would gently get a little bit of icing on Gabby’s nose with his hand, but remaining alert that no one tries to push his daughter into the cake.
“Están son… las mañanitas [these are… the beloved mornings],” Miguel starts singing, his voice low. “Que cantaba el rey David. Hoy por ser día de tu santo, te las cantamos a ti. Despierta - [That King David sang. Today being your saint’s day (same as birthday), we sing them for you. Wake up -]” Miguel pauses, inhaling sharply. “Mi niña, despierta. Mira que ya amaneció… ya los pajaritos cantan, la luna ya se metió [My little girl, wake up. Look, the sun is up… the little birds sing, the moon is gone]…” he sings softly, trailing off.
The next part of the song carries on, credit to Lyla. She starts playing it from where Miguel left off, Vicente Fernandez's voice filling the kitchen.
You sit by, listening to the music and how Miguel sings a song he's known and sang many times in his childhood for friends and Gabriel, but one he never had the opportunity to sing for Gabby.
Despite wanting to join him, you let Miguel do it on his own, respecting he’d want to do so.
“Con jazmines y flores, este día quiero adornar. Hoy, por ser día de tu santo, te venimos a cantar [With jasmine and flowers, this day I want to decorate. Today, for being your saint’s day, we come to sing],” Miguel finishes at last, his voice just a tad louder than when he first started. He clears his throat, wiping some tears from his eyes.
“Do you want to sing ‘Happy Birthday,’ too?” you ask gently.
“… Yeah, would you…?” he asks taking a moment to swallow. “Join me?”
Of course, you nod. How could you ever decline Miguel when it comes to his daughter? Never.
And so, the two of you sing to Gabby.
”Cha, cha, cha” Miguel adds at the end. He turns to face you, his cheeks dusted with redness. “We always did that in the family at the end. Right before the ‘queremos pastel’ and ‘que lo parta’ - Gabriel used to love that when he was little [we want cake; cut it (referring to the cake)],” Miguel shares a fond smile on his face, his eyes misty with tears before turning to look at the cake again.
By this point, the birthday girl should’ve made her wish and blown the candles. He swallows harshly, realizing. Someone needs to blow the candles. He pulls the cake closer to himself, feeling the heat from the candles. He turns to look at you then, a sudden thought popping into his mind.
“I was going to blow the candles… Would you like to do it with me?” Miguel asks softly, his eyes searching your face for any discomfort. He knows he might be asking for too much already. You’ve done so much by baking the cake, by being so thoughtful with the details that he has no doubt Gabby would’ve loved and gushed about.
Now, he’s asking this extra thing from you, asking you to join him in blowing the birthday candles for someone you didn’t have the opportunity to meet, but the way you talk about Gabby and how you look at her pictures on the wall lets Miguel know you care about her as if you had known her personally.
And not just Gabriella, but Gabriel, too. You’ve told him how you wish they were around, so you could’ve met them and known them, something that always makes his heart swell with tenderness and happiness. How he wishes they were around for that, too, to meet you.
Knowing how you feel about two of the most important people in his life, makes Miguel feel a little less worried. Still, he searches your face to make sure he isn’t placing you in an uncomfortable position. However, when he meets your eyes, he finds no discomfort at all.
You nod gently. “If you wish me to.”
“Yes, please. If you’re okay with it,” he replies, still holding your gaze, giving you an option.
“I’m okay with it... In honor of Gabby,” you respond warmly, images of the little girl still flashing in your mind, thinking how much different this would be if she was here.
Miguel might still have tears in his eyes, but they’d be happy ones. Maybe a little bittersweet knowing that his kid is growing older, but he’d be happy because he gets to celebrate his daughter - because he’s a dad and he has family.
You wonder if some spider members, like the spider gang, would’ve been invited to the party, whether it’d be a small or medium size gathering. You wonder what the decorations might be like. Miguel would’ve gone all out, no corners cut to celebrate, no doubt. He would’ve probably blown balloons and stuck decorations on the walls. He would’ve planned the party for weeks, so it would be perfect for Gabby.
He would’ve ordered a cake with plenty of time to make sure there were no problems. If he was unable to pick it up himself, he would’ve sent his most trusted person to pick it up. Probably not Miles after he share the incident with his dad’s cakes when he became captain though.
Maybe it would’ve been Jess if she was available. Or, maybe even Ben Reilly. Maybe his wife if they were still together.
Or maybe, he would’ve asked you if you were still friends in this alternative scenario.
Either way, the cake would’ve been left to someone trustworthy while Miguel got other things completed. There would’ve probably been party hats passed out, the penthouse filled with people. You wonder what Miguel would have ordered for food, or whether he might have cooked it himself because Gabby requested her favorite foods for her birthday.
You think back to Dia de los Muertos [Day of the Dead] and the foods Miguel offered for Gabby’s ofrenda [altar]. Would she had requested some of those foods? You remember she especially loved Miguel’s breakfasts, specifically pancakes with chocolate chips.
Perhaps Miguel would’ve made that for her this morning. He would’ve woken up early, but not to head to HQ. No, the reason why Miguel would’ve woken up early would’ve been to make Gabriella her favorite breakfast, if it was the same to this day, of course. He would’ve cooked for her and then woken her up at an appropriate time, las mañanitas [the birthday song, Mexico’s version] playing thanks to Lyla.
You imagine her waking up, the sleepiness wearing off her face as she realizes it’s her birthday. Perhaps Miguel met her at her bed, giving her a tight bear hug, wondering how it’s possible that his daughter has turned a year older, wondering where time is going, hoping that she doesn’t grow up too soon.
He may have pushed his thoughts away, trying to avoid the bittersweet feelings and focusing on making sure that Gabby’s birthday is perfect, so he’d tell her to come to the kitchen only to surprise her with favorite breakfast, hinting at a special day ahead with the birthday party scheduled for the afternoon. And oh, you know he would’ve left HQ early. Nothing, no mission or anomaly, would’ve prevented him from making it to his daughter’s party.
You sigh softly at the thoughts, the wishes for Miguel and Gabby. How you wish they could’ve had today.
Maybe in another universe, still undiscovered by the Spider Society, a Miguel had the privilege of doing that with another version of Gabby today.
“One… Two…” Miguel counts softly, thinking of what could’ve been today - of all the ways he would’ve made sure today was perfect for his daughter. If only they could’ve had today. If only they could’ve had a full lifetime.
“Three,” you both whisper before leaning forward and blowing the candles.
You both watch as the small trails of smoke rise above the cake, leaning back once more.
“Feliz Cumpleaños, mija [Happy Birthday, my daughter],” Miguel whispers tenderly. “I hope wherever you are… That you’re celebrating with Miguel and your uncle Gabriel. Maybe with your grandmother Conchata, too, if she’s available. Te quiero, y te sigo extrañando. Como siempre [I love you, and I keep missing you. Like always].”
“Happy Birthday, Gabby…” you say gently after gulping a small knot in your throat due to Miguel’s words. “I hope you’re having a lovely day with Gabriel and your other dad. I hope there’s lots of pan dulce [Mexican sweet bread], especially pink conchas [seashell shaped pan dulce], and your favorite Mexican candy.”
Miguel chuckles, ducking his head to wipe the tears from his eyes with the back of his hand.
“Pink conchas and Mexican candy. That would make her day,” he says straightening up, smiling despite the tears. He dries them again, sighing. He turns to look at you, filled with ternura [tenderness]. “Thank you for your sweet words, for agreeing to blow the candles with me, for the cake…” He pauses. “Thank you for everything. I hope you know how much it means to me, how much I appreciate it - thank you, dulzura,” he whispers gently, sincerely.
You smile at him, nodding. “Always, Miguel,” you whisper.
He smiles softly before it fades, his expression turning to an apologetic one. “The last few days…”
“Don’t worry about it,” you reply.
“No, I do,” he states firmly, shifting closer. He turns his body to face you fully, his legs touching your leg closest to him. “I… want to say I’m sorry. I haven’t been… It’s been a few hard days knowing her birthday was coming up, and I… It still hurts,” he says. “It still hurts and instead of talking about it with you, I just - partially shut down, like I used to before… You,” Miguel confesses. “I’m sorry if I’ve made you uncomfortable the last few days, making it seem like I didn’t want to be around you. I wanted to but I didn’t want to burden you with all of this.” He sighs. “I didn’t want to cast my rain on you.”
“Cast your rain on me?” you question, tilting your head to the side. “You know that’s… what friends are for.” You give him a reassuring smile. “I understand though… About it hurting and shutting down. It’s okay,” you reassure Miguel. “And you don’t need to apologize. I was worried but… I understand.”
“I do need to apologize,” Miguel insists. “If it was you, I would’ve…” Miguel trails off, scratching his neck. “I would’ve felt that you were pushing me away without a reason. I never want to make you feel like that,” he shares unable to look you in the eyes, so he focuses on the cake again while he speaks. He reads Gabby’s name on it before turning back to you. “I’m sorry, dulzura. I’m still learning.”
“It’s alright, Miguel,” you tell him again. “Should we… cut the cake?”
“You refuse to accept my apology,” he says, brows furrowed.
“Is that necessary?”
“It was a jerk move.”
“I don’t see it that way, but if it makes you feel better, apology accepted,” you reply, flashing him a small smile. “I appreciate your apology, and your willingness to share what’s been going on.”
Miguel nods at that, relieved that you’ve accepted his apology for the way he’s been acting recently.
You nod back, still smiling.“Cake time?”
“Cake time,” Miguel answers with a small smile.
You both turn your attention to the cake again just in time to see two candles sparkling and then flickering back to full life for a few seconds before they go out again, on their own.
With knitted eyebrows, you turn to look at each other, equally surprised by the short moment before turning your attention back to the cake.
As you remain sitting, watching the cake, the mood changes to a significantly lighter one, as if something physically tugged a heavy cloak from your shoulders to relieve them.
For a few seconds, neither of you say anything, basking in the new and light atmosphere that descends on the two of you like falling leaves in autumn.
“I’ll get the knife and plates,” you say breaking the silence after a few seconds.
“I’ll get us drinks and utensils,” Miguel replies before you both gather everything on the counter and prepare to cut the cake.
You hand him the knife so he can do the honors but at the last second he pulls back. “Wait,” he says. “Before I cut it - Lyla?”
“Yes, jefe [boss]?” Lyla says appearing in front of you.
“Can you… Can you take a photo of it?” Miguel asks her.
With a little grin, Lyla nods. “I got you covered. I’ve already taken a few…” she admits. “But I’ll take one more.” With that, she takes one more photo, which she displays for you to see. “What do we think? You outdid yourself, D, by the way.”
“D?” Miguel and you say at the same time.
Lyla turns and smirks. “Well, Miguel gave you ‘Dulzura,' so I figured I could call you D.”
“Oh,” you say, not sure if you’re up for that.
“I don’t think that’s…” Miguel trails off, not liking it himself, but at least Lyla isn’t trying to call you dulzura either. For some reason the idea of someone else calling you that, even if it’s his own AI assistant, rubs him the wrong way, but he doesn’t say that. “I think… Maybe consider something else.“
“Fine. I see neither of you are happy with it. You outdid yourself, Y/N. There. Better?” Lyla says rolling her eyes. “The longer you two spend time together, the more you team up against me. It’s so unfair.”
Miguel and you chuckle.
“And now they’re laughing at me. Humans,” Lyla mumbles under her breath. “Are you cutting the cake or not?”
“Yeah, yeah, we’re cutting the cake,” Miguel says. “Thank you for taking the photo, L.”
“L?” Lyla repeats, offended.
“It’s for Lyla,” you say with a smile, making Miguel smirk softly since you’re following along with his teasing.
“You’re not calling me ‘L’ - I reject that,” Lyla replies, crossing her arms over chest.
“We’ll think of another nickname then,” Miguel replies, positioning the knife to cut the cake at last.
“Finally!” Lyla says. “Queremos pastel [we want cake]!”
“Queremos pastel [we want cake],” Miguel repeats, lowering the knife, imagining for a second that Gabby is the one cutting it, not him. He imagines himself taking photos from the back to capture the moment. “Queremos pastel, pastel, pastel [we want cake, cake, cake].”
You smile, listening to Miguel say ‘we want cake’ as he finally slices it. Lyla and you clap softly, which warms Miguel’s heart.
“Happy Birthday, Gabby!” Lyla says, smiling fondly at the cake. “I wish I could eat cake,” she adds frowning.
“You have no idea what you’re missing out on,” Miguel says with a smile as he cuts two slices, one for each of you.
“You don’t have to rub it in, Miguel,” she replies with a huff as she watches Miguel fix you a plate first, carefully placing it in front of you before fixing his own.
You wait until Miguel has his plate ready and then, you both try the cake at the same time.
You both sigh in content as the flavors melt in your mouth, pleased with it. Of course, there was no doubt in your minds that it was going to be good, especially not in Miguel’s mind. He loves your baking and cooking, but especially your baking since it satisfies his sweet tooth. So he had no doubt your baking was going to be excellent as always.
You both go for a second slice, which you take to the living room for more comfort after storing the remainder of the cake away. Miguel brings Gabby’s guitar along, placing it next to him on the floor. You’ve returned to the same spots from earlier, sitting side by side on the ground.
Lyla disappeared at some point while Miguel served the second slices, unusually quiet as she glanced between you before flickering away, so it’s just the two of you and light music for now as you eat your extra slices of cake.
Finishing with his, Miguel clears his throat and carefully dabs his mouth clean with a napkin. He rests his back on the couch, smiling gently as he watches you bring the fork to your mouth to eat.
“As always, your baking was incredible,” he compliments you. “Thank you for baking it. I believe Gabby would’ve loved it.”
“I’m happy and flattered to hear that,” you reply with a smile.
“She would be - probably giving you a lot of hugs right now.”
That makes you smile brighter, a warm feeling in your chest grows at the simple idea of Gabby loving her birthday cake so much that she’d give you a hug, or multiple.
“I would’ve accepted every single one of them,” you answer, still smiling.
“And returned them,” Miguel adds, knowing you so well. “You would’ve returned every single hug Gabby gave you and then add one or two more.”
“You know me too well,” you say chuckling before you take a sip from your glass. “I would’ve.”
Miguel picks up the guitar, a small smile on his face still. He brushes his fingers against the strings, thinking.
“The last few days were hard, knowing that her birthday was approaching. It’s hard, still,” he says, looking at it. “I didn’t expect for it to hurt less so soon, of course, but it always hurts to think she didn’t turn a year older, even if that would’ve been bittersweet.”
“In a way, I think I know what that would’ve felt like,” Miguel continues, his lips almost pouting. “I watched Gabriel grow older before my own eyes and it always made me feel bittersweet, to see my little brother grow older. I imagine I would’ve felt something similar with Gabby… but it’s not only that that hurts. It hurts that I can’t visit her somewhere. There’s nowhere for me to go. To visit her. I can go and visit my mom and Gabriel, but Gabriella… She’s gone. Really gone. There’s no resting place for her - because there’s no… her,” Miguel whispers, looking at the guitar in his hands.
To think he was the last one to hold her, his arms were the last thing she felt. “I was the last one to hold her. The last thing she felt… were my arms around her. That’s brought me some… comfort over time. She didn’t suffer in her last moments, not physically. I don’t know what I would’ve done if she had.” Miguel’s eyes shut tight, his head lowering. He would’ve hated himself so much more than he does already for not stopping what happened.
After several seconds of silence, he opens his eyes. “But as I was saying… there’s nowhere to see her. Nowhere to offer her flowers. I would visit her every day if there was. I would change her flowers every few days. I would’ve visited today and taken some things for her but there’s nowhere to go.”
You listen intently to Miguel, nodding as he talks. The very same thought has come to your mind before, about how Gabby doesn’t have a resting place, somewhere for Miguel to visit her. You remember thinking about it a while back, imagining how much harder it would be for someone like Miguel to heal from his loss when there’s no resting place for Gabby because her universe collapsed.
“It’s something I think about often, but I can’t do anything about it,” Miguel says playing a few strings.
You hum softly, staying quiet for a few moments and simply watching Miguel as his fingers move over the strings, not playing. “I can imagine, Miguel,” you reply gently after some seconds.
You look over to the wall, your gaze finding the photographs you helped Miguel hang not too long ago. It’s become a special spot for him in the penthouse, a detail that’s given the place a much warmer vibe along with the other changes Miguel has made.
Your eyes move to the console table attached to the same wall, decorated with a simply abstract figure. It’s a spot neither of you have thought about spicing up with Miguel trying to redecorate.
“I know you said there’s nowhere to go… But what if…” you trail off, the idea still forming in your head.
“What if…?” Miguel repeats, wondering what you’re thinking about. He’s both curious and excited to hear whatever is on your mind, something that might give him some comfort regarding the situation.
“What if you give her a place here?” you continue, nodding to the console table. “Her special place for you to visit her per say, close to you, here in your home.”
His eyes light up at the idea.
“Never mind, that’s probably… not a good idea,” you say, doubting yourself, but when you turn to look at Miguel, he’s shaking his head.
“I like it. I like it a lot. In fact… I love it,” he says softly with a little smile. “I spend a lot of time here at the living room, so it’d be nice to set it here. And,” he pauses, standing up and looking around. “This place receives a lot of natural light. She loved the sunshine. Sometimes I think she would’ve loved the living room especially for that reason, the sunshine coming through the windows while she colored on the coffee table,” Miguel continues, a hint of excitement in his voice, as his mind works on how he wants it to look - to honor his little girl, to have a place to visit her in a way as you said. He walks over to you and hands you the guitar. “Hold this, please, while I go get something. I’ll be right back.”
He exits the living room before you can say anything, heading towards the office on the first floor, so you hold the guitar with care knowing how special it is.
This is the first time you’ve held it, so you inspect it a little closer to look at the stickers Gabby put on it. There’s three flowers on it, a DNA strand, and a science symbol which doesn’t surprise you. Miguel has always stated how much Gabby loved science, how bright she was. You smile tenderly at it, allowing yourself to realize it was once held by her, a thought that makes you tear up a little. You think about how this guitar was once held by that little girl with the toothy smile who loved pink conchas, chocolate chip pancakes, arroz con leche [Mexican rice pudding], and Choco Milk. The little girl whose birthday is today, who loved science and candy so much her dad couldn’t say no to her, and who loved bees and the color lilac. The one that played guitar and fútbol [I don’t want to call it soccer], who sometimes fell asleep on the way home after a victorious game.
You turn the guitar over, reading the name on the back.
“Gabriella O’Hara,” you whisper, your fingertips barely touching it. “Gabby.” You sniffle quietly and wipe tears from your eyes, not wanting Miguel to see you crying but then, a tissue comes into your vision.
Startled, you look up and find Miguel, his own eyes teary due to seeing and hearing you cry. Despite his own sadness - his grief - he still finds it in himself to offer you a reassuring, little smile before he carefully dries your tears with the tissue.
“I’m sorry,” you whisper, embarrassed.
“Don’t be,” Miguel whispers back. “Seeing how much you care about Gabby, despite not having the opportunity to meet her, is so touching to me. You have no idea.” He clears his throat and steps back once he’s done. “It means so much to me that you care about her.”
You sniffle again, trying to recover. “I do. If I could do something to bring her back…”
Miguel’s face softens even more.
“I’d give my life so she was here with you,” you say, looking down at the guitar. “So you’d be happy.”
“I would still be hurting,” Miguel says quietly, which makes you look up, frowning.
“Why?” you ask softly, so honestly it leaves Miguel in disbelief for a few seconds.
“Why? You ask why?” he says, his brows raising. “I’d be missing and grieving you, dulzura. That’s why.” He sits near you with a sigh. “So… don’t ever sacrifice yourself,” Miguel says quietly, firmly. “Please.” Just the idea of something happening to you… It leaves more than a bitter taste in Miguel’s mouth. He doesn’t know what he’d do if you were hurt, if something else happened. He doesn’t want to think about it.
You nod slowly, his words sinking in. Without saying it directly, Miguel has stated that he cares about you. It brings a little smile to your face as you hand him the guitar, thinking he’d appreciate holding it again. Your fingers brush his as the guitar is exchanged but neither of you say anything about it.
“But I’m touched you care so much about Gabby - about me - that you’d try to bring her back if there was a way, without you giving your life.” Miguel adds. “To make me not happy, but happi-er because despite everything… I am happy these days, you know.” He turns to look at you, nudging his chin at you.
You smile, guessing he’s talking about you, so you nudge your chin back at him because you’re happier these days thanks to him, too.
He flashes you a small grin, for a second having the urge to gently take your chin between his thumb and finger, an urge that disperses quickly when you change the topic for his and your sake.
“You went to get something. What was it?” you ask.
“Right,” Miguel says, remembering. He reaches from his other side and retrieves a picture frame and a candle. “I want to add another photo of Gabby, a larger one to place on the console table. The candle… I want to light one for her. In Mexico, people sometimes have small altars for their loved ones at home throughout the year, you reminded me of that when you mentioned the console table. Tomorrow, I’ll go and buy her flowers from the flower market. I already have a vase that I think will be perfect. It used to be in my mom’s apartment when she lived in the building.”
“That sounds lovely,” you reply with a smile. “It’s going to look so beautiful. What picture are you thinking of using for the altar?”
Miguel sighs. “Well… All the pictures I have are already on the wall.”
You both turn your gazes to the photographs, your eyes finding Gabby’s few remaining photos.
“So, it’ll have to be one of them,” Miguel continues, to this day still upset that there’s not more photos of Gabby.
You nod, wishing there were more photos and videos of Gabby at least.
Seeing a sudden pop of white to your side, you turn and find Lyla. She gives you a look, as if asking you to wish her good luck before she floats farther away so Miguel can see her, too. The sight of Lyla and her expression, at this moment, has your heart racing suddenly.
“Hey… Miguel?” Lyla starts too quietly, too serious.
“Lyla,” Miguel replies his face changing to confusion, then to one of seriousness as his ears identify the different tone in her voice.
“I have something to tell you… It’s a good thing,” she continues looking at him and then at you.
“What is it?” Miguel asks.
“So… A year ago when you were injured in another universe, you know with the Goblin, the system shut down. It was rebooted by Margo and all was great, but some files were temporarily lost due to the sudden shut down. Others became corrupted. I started working on retrieving those files, slowly but surely. There was no rush as those files weren’t top priority, you know, essential to us for our day to day work at HQ. To be honest, I couldn’t even tell you what these files were, since they had no official name when I found them,” Lyla explains.
“Files… What are you getting at?” Miguel asks.
“I’ve retrieved them, uncovered what they were. Including the corrupted files. On my little free time, I’ve been restoring the files and well… It turns out that I had forgotten about some of these files due to previous system reboots. Since they were somehow omitted from my system due to previous shut downs, I didn’t even know they existed anymore, especially being lost and corrupted files within the system.”
“What are they? Why is it important to tell us this now?” Miguel asks, holding on to the guitar. His heart begins to race a little, even though he tells himself to not be stupid - to not have hope there’s more.
“Both the lost and corrupted files have turned out to be…” Lyla trails off, looking between Miguel and you. “Photos and videos of Gabby and you. New ones, not the ones you have already.”
Miguel inhales sharply, his heart racing as Lyla’s words sink in. “It’s not possible,” he says without thinking.
“It is, Miguel,” she replies offering a genuine look. “And I swear I didn’t hide them this time. They were lost and even I had no idea they were just sitting there in the system. I came across the folder sometime over the summer after you were injured and decided to work on them. It wasn’t until October or so that one of the files turned out to be a photo of her. I wanted to tell you right away, but then, I figured that since I didn’t even know about this one photo being lost, maybe a few more files would turn out to be photos of her, too. I was hoping to have it done by Father’s Day, but well, things happen at HQ…” Lyla says apologetically. “I finished today. My work proved to be successful because almost every file was of Gabby. I finished recovering the last one today and I’m happy to tell you that there’s over twenty photos on top of some videos. Do you wish to see them?”
“Yes,” Miguel breathes out. “Yes. Please show them to me.” He turns to look at you, his eyes filled with so many emotions - surprise, disbelief, happiness, and excitement.
“I’ll go - I’m going to wait upstairs,” you say, already making the move to stand up so Miguel will have privacy to look at the photos.
“You don’t have to,” Miguel says, suddenly placing a hand on your shoulder for a few seconds, making you go still at the unexpected touch. “Stay, please.”
You stare at each other as Miguel slowly retrieves his hand. He didn’t plan nor anticipated it. It was a genuine reaction, to keep you here, with him.
“Will you?” he asks.
Nodding, you settle back down. “Yes. If you want to, I will.”
“Thank you,” he replies with a small nod. He turns to Lyla, readjusting his position. “Lyla…”
“Yes, boss?” she replies, knowing.
“Go ahead,” Miguel states, his heart racing. His fingers fiddle with the guitar’s strings, feeling nervous. As Lyla prepares, the idea sinks further. There’s more photos and videos of Gabby. All this time, there’s been more memories sitting in the system, lost but finally recovered.
“Here are the photos,” Lyla says gently as she makes a holographic screen accessible. She turns to you, giving you a small smile and a subtle thumbs up. You suppose she was thinking back to the time when she hid photos of Gabby and his wife, and how Miguel reacted then by shutting her down, but his reaction today is far different. The Miguel from then, you suspect, had done little healing. You turn to the screen after acknowledging her with a nod and a small smile, giving your full attention to Gabby.
Three seconds later, there she is. Beside you, Miguel sighs the way a parent does when looking at old photographs of their children, with nostalgia.
“Gabby,” he whispers, his gaze soft as he takes in the photo of her sitting on a living room floor, coloring books and pencils scattered over a coffee table. Her face is one of concentration as she colors, dressed in jeans and a pink shirt with her hair down.
Photo after photo, Miguel and you observe each one, drinking in the details the way you drink café de olla [coffee]. Slowly, with delicacy and love. While Miguel is thrown right back into his memories, you get more glimpses of his life with her, of that short time. You finally see a little bit more of that universe, leaving an incredible pain in you knowing these photographs and Gabby’s guitar, is basically the only evidence left that that universe once existed to begin with.
Despite that feeling, you smile as the photos progress, seeing Miguel with such a happy smile with his daughter. Your heart beats with tenderness seeing how happy they looked, sharing father and daughter moments, such as them playing dolls on her bedroom floor, a flower sticker on Miguel’s hair.
“I didn’t notice it until I was going to shower,” Miguel says with an amused smile. “She noticed it for sure but she didn’t tell me.”
You laugh softly. “She was probably wondering how long it’ll take before you realized.”
“Most likely,” Miguel agrees, shaking his head in amusement before you both turn back to look at the next photo.
Everything is fine and lighthearted inside you as more photos are displayed but your throat suddenly feels impossibly restricted when the photo changes to one of a sleeping Miguel and Gabby on her bed. An open book, abandoned, can be seen on the side. It’s clearly night time, a single lit lamp in what used to be the little girl’s bedroom while Gabby and Miguel sleep, the latter having fallen asleep at some point while reading to his daughter. Your vision becomes blurry when you spot their same sleepy faces, their mouths open just slightly, identically like father and daughter. Silently, the tears roll down your face without warning.
You don’t dare turn to look at Miguel, or even make a subtle move to wipe your tears away because you don’t wish for him to see you crying. You don’t want your tears to make him tear up, too. Inhaling gently, you attempt to swallow the painful knot in your throat and rein in your emotions, but your eyes remain fixed on the photo, on sleeping Miguel and Gabby - no worries in their minds as they peacefully sleep.
For Gabby, she’s in the comfort of her father’s arms - safe and sound, protected. For Miguel, you imagine in those moments that the multiverse didn’t exist. It was a far away concept in those moments, so far he slipped into his sleep with ease and without a fight - a high contrast to what awaited him in the future. Sleepless and long nights in his dark and empty lab due to nightmares, alone with the exception of Lyla at times. The children’s books he read to Gabby replaced with data reports pertaining to the multiverse once more by a cruel and unexpected twist of misfortune, something Miguel has been no stranger to.
Still staring at the photo, you once again wonder how different Miguel’s life would have been had Gabby’s universe not collapsed. You wonder if he’d still live there in that universe, or whether he would’ve told Gabby and his wife about his universe, have them move to Nueva York, here to his penthouse.
You wonder, if perhaps, Miguel and his wife would’ve divorced and it would’ve been Gabby and Miguel alone then.
You wonder if her room would’ve been Gabriel’s, or if Miguel would’ve done changes to the penthouse, like making the upstairs office an extra bedroom. Perhaps, on this coffee table in front of you, Gabby’s coloring books or hair ties, or something that belonged to her, could be found.
“I used to read to her every night,” Miguel says, bringing his knees close to him, resting his arms on them. “I’m so glad there’s a memory of it. That I can see her sleepy face again physically, not just in my head.” He wipes his eye using the sleeve of his sweatshirt. He sniffles quietly before he reaches with his hand, zooming in on her specifically. He traces his daughter’s face as if he were actually tracing it physically, with such tenderness and so much love. “Su carita [her little face],” he whispers. “I’d forget everything about the Spider Society at the sight of that little face. I wasn’t Spider-Man. I was just ‘papá’ or ‘daddy’ - and my biggest worry was a scraped knee during practices [papa].”
He turns to face you slowly, finally realizing you’ve been so quiet, so still. His gaze softens when you turn away as an attempt to keep him from seeing your face, the tears staining your cheeks.
“Dulzura?”
“Yeah?” you reply, clearing your throat, trying to make it seem like you’re fine.
“You don’t have to hide your tears,” Miguel says gently. “Not from me.”
With that, you turn to face him. You offer him a small smile. “I’m sorry… This photo…” you trail off, looking away to dry your damp cheeks. “You just - Your sleeping faces are the same,” you continue, chuckling softly instead of crying, even though your eyes are still tearing up. “Even the way your mouths are open just slightly.” You sniffle. “It’s so… sweet, Miguel.”
You shakily huff, drying your face with the back of your hand. You wish you could blame your emotions on something else, like your period, but it’s not even time for that yet. Your emotions are running uncontrollably purely because of Miguel and his daughter. It’s due to the tenderness of this photo and every single moment they were able to share, but knowing it wasn’t, isn’t, and never will be enough for Miguel or Gabby.
And God, you wish on everything that Gabby was here right now. You wish there was a way that time could go back, that you had the answers to the real cause for the collapse of universes. And then, you’d go back and prevent it from happening, along with every other universe that’s been lost.
“You think so?” Miguel asks, his eyes twinkling with delight hearing you say that Gabby and he share the same sleeping faces.
“Absolutely,” you reply. “It’s clear as day.”
Miguel sighs, dropping his arm. He wraps his arms around his legs and stares at the photo some more. “Thank you for saying that,” he whispers. “That makes me feel… happy. Happier.”
“Always,” you whisper back, able to look at the photo again. “This one… It would be sweet to have in your room.”
Miguel hums. “My nightstand.”
“Close to you,” you reply, nodding.
You fall into a comfortable silence, despite the emotions, and continue to observe the photo for a few more minutes before Miguel asks Lyla to display the rest. Each one is as sweet and tender as the last one, but thankfully you don’t cry anymore, or at least not as much.
“There are a few videos,” Lyla says turning to look at Miguel, talking for the first time since she shared the fact that these files exist. She’s been silently watching the two of you, glad that Miguel has you by his side while he goes through the photos - relieved that he isn’t alone today, and tomorrow, and the date afterwards. He has someone. You. “Do you wish to watch them?”
“Yes, please,” Miguel answers turning to look at Lyla before his eyes turn back to the screen.
As time goes on, Miguel and you watch the videos, all of which are of just him and Gabby. And thankfully, they’re all long videos. You watch Gabriella play fútbol in the backyard with Miguel. There’s the one Christmas they spent together, with Gabby excitedly showing Miguel new toys.
“Christmas,” Miguel says softly. “She was so excited. I did the Santa’s snow boots footprints, she was squealing with happiness when she woke up and saw them,” he shares.
You watch the video, thinking. Miguel was that kind of father, and it makes so much sense.
At last, Lyla turns to face the two of you. “This is the last one,” Lyla says softly as the screen changes before it starts.
Miguel and you both watch as the video clip begins playing, starting with Gabby on display holding her guitar and playing it. Miguel sits on a chair watching with an expression that leaves no room for question how proud he felt in that moment. Like in every video and photo, Miguel’s eyes have a special spark, one you recognize in Peter B. and MJ, Jess and her husband, and Mr. and Mrs. Morales. It’s the spark a loving, caring parent has in their eyes when looking at or talking about their child. Miguel had it around Gabby, and now it’s only visible when he talks about her, or when he looks at her photos.
A warm, gentle, and beautiful smile grazes his face as he watches and listens to Gabby expertly play the guitar at such age, a look of concentration on her sweet face. She plays a melody you don’t recognize but one she seems to know by heart, no mistakes made. She ends her playing gently, the sound pleasant to the ears before she eagerly and expectantly looks at her father, a smile that reminds you of Miguel’s, too, on her face.
“That was amazing, mija [my daughter]!” Miguel says suddenly with such energy you swear you’ve never seen in him before. “You get better and better the more you practice, eh? My little musician!”
You smile, seeing Gabby’s smile widen before she runs to her father, throwing her arms around his neck. The sight of Miguel instantly wrapping his arms around his daughter makes your heart weak. There has never been any doubt in your mind that Miguel loved, still loves, Gabby, but this interaction hits you deeply. You see the way his eyes close in content, his smile unfaltering as he hugs his daughter tightly. He’s so proud of her. He’s so loving, tender, sweet.
There’s also no doubt in your mind. Being a father suits him so much even if he once thought he wasn’t meant to. Quite the contrary, Miguel was meant to be a father.
“Now it’s your turn, daddy! You play and sing!” Gabby says excitedly, pulling back to offer Miguel the guitar.
Miguel shakes his head gently. “I think you should keep playing, mija [my daughter].”
“Please? Pretty please, daddy?” Gabby insists, puppy eyes on full display. “Sing my favorite song, please.”
And just like Miguel has told you before, he was never able to say no to Gabby when it came to healthy, harmless requests like these. He accepts the guitar.
“Just one song, and then you play again. ¿Entiendes, chiquilla [do you understand, little girl]?”
“Okay, okay! Ya se [I know], but please! I like to hear you sing, daddy,” Gabby says taking a seat in front of Miguel on the floor, watching him like he’s the center of her universe.
“Okay, okay. Ay vamos [we’re going, starting]…” Miguel says with a little sigh. “How does it start?”
“Dad!” Gabby whines with a little huff. “You know how it starts!”
“I forgot. What are the first notes, again?” Miguel asks with a sweet, playful smile that stays on his face as Gabby tells him. “Ah, okay. So… Something like this,” he says playing a few notes that earns him eager nods from Gabby. “Okay, I think I got it, mija [my daughter].” He begins to play the guitar again, the same notes Gabby was playing earlier but continuing on.
And for the first time since you’ve known Miguel, you hear him truly sing.
“Luna gardenia de plata que en mi serenata, te vuelves canción. Tú que me viste cantando, me ves hoy llorando, mi desilusión. Calles bañadas de luna que fueron la cuna de mi juventud. Vengo a cantarle a mi amada, la luna plateada de mi Xelajú…” Miguel sings with ease, his brows furrowing slightly, gazing at his daughter who smiles tenderly at her father. “En mis noches de pena, por una morena de dulce mirar,” Miguel continues singing, smiling at Gabby, nodding at her. He earns himself a sweet, happy, and toothy smile along with an applause from Gabby’s hands, and it’s so heartwarming, so sweet Miguel can’t help himself from stopping midway when he sees Gabby rise and head straight for him.
He welcomes her in his arms, laughing softly as he places the guitar down to fully embrace her like it’s the last time he’ll ever be able to. The thought breaks you. He never imagined he’d lose her - not while embracing her like that nor when he read bedtime stories to her.
“Again, daddy! This time all the song, please,” Gabby says hugging Miguel, her father.
“Okay, okay, mija [my daughter], but first we need to have dinner. C’mon, the caldo [broth] should be ready now,” Miguel says carrying her to what you assume is the kitchen. “Le agregue muchas papitas pa’ que comas. Tienes que comer pa’ que estés fuerte y sana. ¿Recuerdas? [I added a lot of potatoes so you’ll eat. You must eat so you’ll be strong and healthy. Remember?]”
“¡Y pollito [and chicken]!” Gabby says making Miguel chuckle.
“Si y mucho pollito. También zanahorias [yes and chicken. Carrots, too].”
“Eugh, no carrots, please.”
The last thing heard is Miguel’s laughter as they both disappear into the kitchen, the screen returning to the all familiar marigold color used for all screens in the Spider Society.
You chuckle softly as you remember something. “So she wasn’t fond of carrots either.”
Turning to look at you, Miguel frowns softly yet he’s amused. He remembers that evening so vividly now, how it felt to carry his daughter to the kitchen so they could check on the food. “Either?”
“Remember when you were injured last year?” you ask, which instantly reminds Miguel.
“Dios [God], that carrot was disgusting,” he says frowning deeply. “I don’t know how we didn’t throw up right there.”
Covering your mouth, you laugh, recalling the face he made that day when he tried it. “I’m sorry.”
“You’re laughing,” Miguel says raising an eyebrow, feigning disappointment and offense. “Can’t believe you made me try it.”
“I didn’t think it was actually bad,” you reply. “In my defense, I thought since it’s this dimension, and all the great resources at HQ, that the infirmary food would be top notch.”
“Mala [Meanie, feminine version in Spanish],” Miguel replies, amusement dancing in his eyes. “At least you tried it, too. So we’re even.”
“Never again.” You chuckle again. “If I ever end up there, please spare me from the carrots.”
Miguel’s amusement falters a bit. “I hope you’re never there. Not even for a minor cut, but I promise I’ll spare you from the horrible food,” he says earnestly, leaving no doubt in your mind that you’ll never taste that food. Again. “I swear.”
“Thank you,” you reply softly with a smile.
“Always. I’ll protect your food palate,” he says, amused yet again.
You both smile at each other, staying quiet for a few seconds before you speak again. “That was… Very beautiful, Miguel,” you start quietly. “Your voice. You singing to Gabby her favorite song. You made her happy, so happy.”
He nods, his smile shifting to a much tender one. “I sang it to her every time she wanted me to. It was a pure request, an easy way to make her happy. I always wanted her to be so,” Miguel shares. “And if I could make her happy in such an easy way, I would. It was also bonding for us. I never wanted to make her feel like I didn’t want to spend time with her, like she was being rejected. I wanted her to feel loved,” he adds softly. “For her to know she was deeply loved and cared for. That she didn’t need to hide anything. I wanted her to have what I…” Miguel pauses, swallowing. “What I didn’t have at her age. That unconditional love, protection, and tenderness from a parent. Constant. Not in pauses, making her wonder if she had done something wrong.”
Nodding, you sigh softly. You know about Miguel’s childhood; about the situation with his mother Conchata and his stepfather, on top of the situation with his biological father. You try not to think about it often because each time you do, anger and sadness flares up inside you for him. You hate that Miguel experienced such rejection and negligence in his early life, how it has affected him throughout the years.
You’re glad, at least, that by the end of Conchata’s life, Miguel had somewhat of a stable relationship with her, something you’ve wondered about sometimes at random times. You wonder, if time had allowed, whether Miguel and her could’ve worked on their relationship, if by now they’d have a better one, but of course, it’s fruitless to think of such moments. Conchata has been gone for several years.
Another thing you wonder is if she saw the way Miguel stepped up to the role of father and how wonderful, tender, sweet, and loving he was to Gabby from wherever she is. You wonder if she felt shame, knowing her son tried to be everything she hardly was for Gabby.
“It’s evident you did just that,” you say at last, concentrating on the now. “She was so happy, Miguel. Her laughter, her smiles - all signs of a happy, safe, and loved child.”
Miguel hums, his gaze softening at your words. “Thank you,” he whispers. “I tried my best to be a good father.” He turns his gaze towards the guitar, the lovely and bittersweet song stuck in his head. He picks it up and holds it, remembering how many times he played the song for her. His fingers glide over the stickers, thinking how it’s still her birthday.
There’s a chance her favorite song would’ve changed by now. Maybe she wouldn’t be interested in playing the guitar anymore but rather another instrument. There’s a lot of things that could’ve changed by now, truly. Maybe Gabby would’ve stopped playing fútbol. Maybe she would’ve stopped loving science.
He’ll never know now.
But maybe there’s a chance, that despite the years… “Luna de Xelajú” would still hold a special place in her tender heart. Maybe she’d appreciate her father remembering the times she asked him to play it for her, to sing her the song while gazing at her, letting her know that she was his morena de dulce mirar [his brunette, or of dark complexion, girl with a sweet gaze]. Just maybe, she’d let her old man play and sing it for her on her birthday even if she no longer begged him to sing it by wrapping her short arms around his neck, giggling and calling him daddy.
Just maybe.
Miguel clears his throat and positions his fingers. How does it start?
“You know how it starts!”
He hears Gabby’s voice in his head, even the little huff. Right. Like this. His fingers move, playing the notes for the first time since he lost his daughter. For a moment, he thinks he messed up, but no, his memory doesn’t betray him, and so his fingers move, as if they had a mind of their own.
You watch as he begins to play, familiar to your ears now thanks to the video. Your eyes remain on him, not missing even a second of this. For a moment, you wonder if you’re imagining it, but no, Miguel really is playing the guitar and playing Gabby’s song, at least the beginning of it.
You suddenly realize what he’s trying to do, just as Lyla does, too because a second later, Lyla displays a photo of Gabby, one of the new ones, for Miguel.
Miguel is going to play and sing the song for her, on her birthday.
Holding your breath, you watch Miguel lift his gaze to the screen, still playing the guitar before he begins.
“Luna gardenia de plata, que en mi serenata te vuelves canción. Tú que me viste cantando, me ves hoy llorando mi desilusión,” Miguel sings softly, staring at his daughter’s photo, his expression gentle yet with a trace of mourning and grief. “Luna de Xelajú, que supiste alumbrar, en mis noches de pena por una morena de dulce mirar,” he continues, his gaze softening and his mouth pouting.
You remain still, almost as still as a statue itself. You have heard Miguel sing before when he does so under his breath, sometimes unaware of it, but nothing compare to this. If his voice sounds beautiful in the video, it sounds angelic live. His voice travels straight to your heart.
Still playing, Miguel’s eyes fill with some tears. After so long, he’s playing and singing her song. For so long, he’s tried to not think of it, finding it to be too much for him, too soon for his grieving heart, but his very heart seems to have found today appropriate for it.
Maybe it’s another sign of him healing, Miguel doesn’t know, but he has no regrets playing it now. It feels right, so he continues, hoping that wherever Gabby is, she’s listening to him sing it at last, just for her.
“En mi vida no habrá, más cariño que tú, mi amor. Porque no eres ingrata, mi Luna de plata, luna de Xelajú. Luna que me alumbró, en mis noches de amor… [in my life there won’t be more love than you, my love. Because you’re not ungrateful, my moon of silver, moon of Xelajú. Moon that lightened me up, in my nights of love]” Miguel sings, his fingers slowing down as he pauses for a few seconds. “Hoy consuelas la pena… Por una morena… que me… Abandonó [today you console the sorrow… for a brunette, or girl of dark complexion… that… abandoned me],” he sings the end in a whisper, a single tear rolling down his face as his fingers play the last notes, finishing the song.
He lowers the guitar to his lap slowly, still gazing at Gabby’s photo. He doesn’t bother to wipe away the tear that slowly trails down his face. Instead, he lets it run its course until it sinks into his skin. Miguel inhales heavily and sighs. Something in him, so deep, settling in. It’s a certain kind of peace.
At last, several seconds later, you sigh as well. You didn’t realize you held your breath throughout the entirety of the song, but you did. You didn’t want to miss a single moment of Miguel singing to Gabby; from hearing his gentle, soothing voice.
“That was beautiful,” you whisper quietly, looking at Gabby’s photo.
Miguel smiles slowly. “Thank you,” he whispers back. “I haven’t played, sang, nor heard it since then. The last time was before I lost her. Even the simple thought of it, the melody in my head - was too much for me,” Miguel admits, gathering his thoughts. “If she was alive, I know she’d be changing. The things she once liked, maybe she wouldn’t be much into anymore. Maybe this song wouldn’t be her favorite anymore. There’s a chance… I know, but even then, before I decided to play it, I thought maybe, just maybe, from wherever she’s at, keeping me safe, she might enjoy me playing her once favorite song from down here on Earth… I hope she heard it.”
You smile softly, still staring at the photo and think about Miguel’s words. Maybe Gabby’s music taste would’ve changed by now. Perhaps “Luna de Xelajú” would no longer be her favorite song, and maybe it’s wishful thinking, but a part of you believes that Gabby would’ve loved the beautiful gesture from her dad regardless. And for some reason, you also can’t help but think that maybe she did hear it tonight.
The two flickering birthday candles from earlier come back to mind. That was rather strange. You wonder silently. Maybe the two most important people in Miguel’s life, visited him tonight in their own way.
“I have a feeling she did,” you reply softly.
Miguel turns to face you, shifting his body slightly. “You may think I’m a little bit crazy,” he starts, making you tilt your head towards him with a raised eyebrow, letting him know you don’t. He smiles a bit. “The flickering candles.”
You nod. “I was just thinking about that. Two candles,” you reply.
“Two candles,” Miguel repeats. “Gabby. Gabriel.” He smiles a bit at that. “You don’t think I’m… overthinking it? Maybe with my messed up sleep schedule, I’m just… Not making sense.”
“You’re allowed to believe that,” you state gently. “I’m never going to judge you. I had my fair share of moments in which I felt like Peter and my parents were - leaving me little signs. I also thought about them, you know.” You shift slightly to face him better. “About Gabby and Gabriel.”
Miguel smiles, his head dipping to face the floor. It’s reassuring. He straightens up to look at you again.
“I know I already said it earlier, but, I want to say I’m sorry again. For the way I behaved these last few days.”
You prepare yourself to reply but Miguel lifts his finger, stopping you.
“I don’t want to… Push you away nor make you feel like I’m trying to when I’m not. I have,” Miguel pauses, thinking about that mutual agreement between you some weeks ago.
“We do. We have each other,” Miguel said, before adding, “Always.”
“Always,” you replied.
He also thinks about how you’ve only been a part of his life for a few years. Two, to be exact. It’s a realization that for some reason feels so wrong to him. He wishes you could’ve been in his life sooner, but there’s no time machine to do that, or Miguel would’ve already used it to bring back Gabby and Gabriel. There’s no changing the past, unfortunately, but he has control over some aspects of the future, and he’s already made up his mind. You may have entered his life only two years ago, but he’ll try his absolute best to make sure you stick for the rest of his - until his last breath.
“I don’t want to ever…” he tries and clears his throat. “I don’t want to - I’d like for you - stick around.” He sighs and runs a quick hand through his hair. “I’m not trying to push you - away. Ever.”
You smile at that. “To be honest, it’s going to take a lot for you to push me away. I’m afraid… You’re stuck with me,” you say.
He laughs softly, the sound making your heart swell. “Like that’s a bad thing,” Miguel answers.
“Well… Just saying, so you don’t complain later on.”
“I could never,” Miguel replies, smiling softly.
“Lyla, I hope you recorded that,” you reply, earning yourself a chuckle from Miguel, one that makes you chuckle, too before you both settle into a comfortable silence.
The holographic screen is still available, the same photo of Gabby displayed with one of the sweetest smiles you’ve ever seen.
It’s several minutes later when Miguel breaks the silence. “Tomorrow I’m printing all the photos.” And then remembering, he adds. “Thank you, Lyla. For recovering everything. I… I had no idea there were more photos and videos. Thank you.”
“You got it, Miguel,” Lyla says, looking between him and you, happy that she was able to restore everything. “I’m heading off now. I have some things to work on. Good night.”
“Night,” Miguel replies.
“Good night,” you answer before she disappears.
“Are you tired?” Miguel asks gently.
“Not a lot,” you reply, even though last night you only slept for a few hours. You know Miguel slept even less. “You?”
He shakes his head slightly. “No. Not yet.” He picks up the guitar and plays a few strings, ones you don't recognize.
You remain by his side, letting time go by in each other’s company. Despite the emotions, the mood is lighthearted. Miguel is no longer as quiet and he even offers a few more smiles as the hours go by, smiles that actually reach his eyes.
As time slips by, you notice Miguel grow sleepier and sleepier, which is not surprising. At some point you find him nodding off, so you suggest that he goes to bed but he declines, stating he’s not sleepy yet.
Except, he is and he ends up falling asleep sitting next to you. In a matter of minutes, you grab a pillow from upstairs and your blanket before you reach him. You talk to him softly, waking him enough to talk to him.
“Lay down,” you say, watching the way he looks at you sleepily.
“Mm - no,” he replies, sleepily.
“You’ve fallen asleep. Lay down,” you try again. “Please?”
He sighs, yawning. “I wasn’t sleepy.”
You hold back from chuckling. “I totally believe you. Now, lay down. Please.”
He sighs again, all sleepy and stubborn, but finally lays down.
“Sleep,” you whisper firmly. “Rest, Migs.”
“Are you going upstairs?” he whispers sleepily, his eyes fluttering as he gazes at you, with a hint of a pout.
You smile tenderly at him, the sight of his sleepy features and voice warming your heart.
“I'm staying here,” you reply as you cover him with your blanket, wondering if the reason why he’s asking is because he'll like for you to stay.
“Mm,” he hums sleepily, satisfied with your answer. “Thank you.” He sighs softly, relaxing and settling.
“Lift your head, Miguel.”
“Mhm.” Miguel does so slightly, more asleep than awake now.
You fix the pillow behind his head, your fingers accidentally brushing the small curls on the nape of his neck including the sensitive skin there, eliciting a gentle hum from Miguel, one of contentment, of satisfaction.
You freeze for a second, the sound surprising you. After a second or two, you smile and finish fixing it, pulling the blanket higher up.
“Sleep, Migs,” you whisper tenderly.
“Mhm, dulzura,” Miguel mumbles, dozing off at last.
You take a seat next to him. The holographic screen is still available, displaying the same photo from earlier.
You get comfortable and stare at the photo, thinking about all the new ones, about the videos. You got more glimpses of Miguel's life with his daughter. More glimpses of him being a father.
Turning your attention back to Miguel and taking in all his features, you think once more.
He was meant to be a dad.
You wonder if there's a chance of him opening his heart to someone one day. Of falling in love and having a child. Or, maybe two, or three. Maybe even four.
With thoughts of the possibility of Miguel building a family with someone, you fall asleep yourself.
It's many hours later when you wake up naturally, without the need of an alarm. To your relief, you find Miguel still sleeping peacefully by your side.
Standing up, you notice his sleeping face, once again remembering how similar it is to Gabby's. You hum to yourself, heart swelling with tenderness, before deciding to make coffee.
You go through yesterday's events silently as you prepare the pot and set up the mugs, opting for some simple ones today instead of grabbing more colorful ones, like the mug you gifted Miguel for Father’s Day due to the circumstances of Gabby’s birthday. You wait patiently, remaining quiet to avoid waking up Miguel and think to yourself. You can't believe that all this time there were more photos and videos of Gabby, lost but thankfully recovered and restored by Lyla.
“Good morning,” Miguel says entering the kitchen, his voice still laced with sleep.
“Good morning,” you reply, offering Miguel a smile. “Coffee is almost ready.”
He nods before running a hand through his hair, it being a little disheveled from his sleep. His movement slows down as he vaguely remembers your fingers brushing his hair and neck, a memory that makes his cheeks feel warmer. “I could use some, muchas gracias [thank you].”
“Always,” you reply, not noticing the gentle redness on his cheeks.
He leans on the counter, still waking up and trying to gather his thoughts. He looks over at the coffee and the mugs, remembering. He moves to where the mugs are found and finds the one. It’s the one he’s been using since you gifted it to him; his mug from Father’s Day with the bees. He retrieves it and moves towards you, placing it on the counter near the two you already have out.
“My favorite,” Miguel says looking at it, still so touched by your gifts, bringing a smile to your face.
So, you serve him coffee in that mug and watch him drink it, raising the mug you made with your own hands to his lips. It’s how you also notice the bracelet you gifted him with Gabby’s name on his wrist, another sight that makes you happy. It seems Miguel really liked the gifts.
“Do you want to come with me?” Miguel asks, lowering the mug. “I’m going to the flower market.”
“If it’s alright,” you say, remembering Miguel’s plans to buy flowers for Gabby to place on the altar. “I’d like to.”
Miguel nods. “I’d like for you to come.”
After drinking your mugs of coffee in peace, you both get ready and dress in civilians clothes. For the second time, you borrow the simple holographic suit Miguel allowed you to borrow months ago when your apartment building caught on fire and your suit was dirty and smelling of smoke.
You both slip out of the penthouse and swing through the city before most of the people of Nueva York are awake, before the city is truly buzzing with life. On an alleyway, you both deactivate the suits and step out onto the street wearing your normal clothes to search through the flower market.
You walk around side by side, admiring the different types of flowers available, trying to find the perfect ones for Gabby. You eventually find bouquets that seem to attract both of you; a lovely combination of white and lilac flowers. Together, you choose the best bouquet out of the bunch before continuing to walk around. Despite your mission being accomplished, it seems Miguel is in no rush to leave.
As you both continue to walk around, his gaze turns to you, noticing the way you eye certain flowers with glee and interest. You even stop at certain displays to take a closer look, so Miguel stops to look at them with you, sticking by your side while holding the bouquet he’s already bought.
His brows shoot up when he sees the owner, an older lady, of the display talk to you, inviting you to see further in the back when you stop on theirs.
You shoot him an apologetic smile as the woman enthusiastically talks to you about other options, so he smiles back with a look that lets you know that it’s okay.
“Mujeres. ¿Verdad? [Women. Right?]”
Miguel turns, a little startled by the sudden voice. He finds a man, a much older one.
“¿Disculpe? [Sorry?]” Miguel replies, towering over the man.
“Mujeres divinas. ¿Que haríamos sin ellas? Hermosas. Y mira como les encantan las flores [Divine women. What would we do without them? Beautiful. And look how much they love flowers],” the man says with a smile. “Parece que ya le llevas un arreglo pero le gustan mucho las flores. Así esta mi esposa [looks like you already have an arrangement (bouquet )but she likes flowers. That’s how my wife is],” he says, nodding to the owner. Miguel quickly realizes the owner is the man’s wife. “You know, she pointed you guys out from the little early crowd.”
Miguel clears his throat, looking down at the bouquet of flowers. His mind immediately puts together what the man is insinuating, or rather what he believes.
“She did?” Miguel questions.
“She said that was us thirty-five years ago.”
“Oh,” Miguel says simply for a moment, struck by the fact that two more people have confused him and you for a couple in two weeks, remembering the lady from the grocery store. “We’re… just friends. Best friends.”
The man laughs as his wife and you walk back to them, talking. “That’s how my wife and I started. Friendship is one of the most essential foundations for a blissful and long marriage, mijo [my son]. Take it from me. Thirty-two years of marriage, three kids later. Something to think about, eh? Take care, mijo, and take care of that one, too,” the man says nodding at Miguel and then at you before he withdraws to meet his wife, leaving Miguel speechless.
He watches as the couple talk to you a bit more before finally letting you free. You join his side a few seconds later, smiling.
“Sorry, Mrs. Gonzalez wanted to show me other flowers she has in the back,” you say.
“You learned her name,” Miguel states.
“She introduced herself,” you reply with a shrug. “She was very excited about showing me some flowers. I couldn’t say no.”
“Did you like them?” he asks.
“They were lovely,” you answer, looking at a certain bouquet that caught your eye.
He nods and before you can say anything, he talks to the owners in Spanish.
“Me quiero llevar uno de esos arreglos, por favor. ¿Cuanto es? [I want to take one of those bouquets, please. How much?]”
You watch as the transaction is quickly made between Miguel and Mr. Gonzalez, the latter whispering something to Miguel that you can’t catch.
“¡Gracias, tenga un buen día, don [Thank you, have a good day, sir]!” Miguel says before walking back to you. He hands you the bouquet. “For… you. I noticed you eyeing these.”
You accept them. “Yes, these….” you reply, looking at them and feeling a little awestruck by the fact that you’re suddenly holding a bouquet of flowers bought by Miguel for you. “Thank you. I’ll pay you back. Maybe with some snacks from my universe,” you add at last, moving past the awe, as you both begin to walk.
“No paying back,” Miguel answers as he looks ahead, his tone being one that leaves no room for you argue about it. “It’s… a gift. Look, food trucks. Do you want some breakfast?” Miguel offers, changing the subject, and nodding at the food trucks as you both exit the flower market.
You end up having breakfast on some wooden picnic table under a large umbrella to shield yourselves from the sun since it’s summer now. You talk with ease, the tension from the last few days gone, at last. You both watch as the area quickly fills with more and more citizens from Nueva York, the city coming back to full life.
Instead of swinging back home in your suits, Miguel and you silently agree to walk on the way back. He carries both bouquets of flowers in his arms since he insisted on doing so before you left the picnic table. Together, you walk home, sticking by each other’s side like glue, with Miguel walking closest to the street, keeping you on the inside of the sidewalk.
Once you return home, Miguel and you head to the office room. There, you watch Miguel inject himself with that neon serum you now know about. He looks at you sheepishly as he does so.
“I forgot about it,” Miguel says placing the device down, a glow passing through his crimson eyes.
“It's understandable,” you reply, glad that Miguel is in a different mindset and taking care of this.
With that, you help Miguel print the new photos of Gabby. He makes extra copies for backup purposes, storing them in his personal home computer and multiple USB flashes, or some version of them since they look different in this dimension.
Miguel also retrieves the vase he mentioned the night before and at last, he has everything to set up his little altar for Gabby.
As he places one of the photos in the picture frame, you open the bouquet of flowers he bought for her and arrange it in his mom's vase.
When everything is ready, and the surface has been cleaned properly, you both approach the console table with the items. You stand by, holding the vase, and let Miguel work at his pace.
The photo is placed first and then the vase with pretty and fresh flowers. Miguel retrieves the guitar from where he left it last night and carefully places it next to the console table, taking a few moments to look at it.
He’s glad that it's not hidden away anymore, that he'll be able to look at it every day now. At last, he places a candle and lights it, completing the altar for now. Maybe in the future he'll change something, but right now, it's perfect.
The altar is beautiful. You love the fact that Miguel has added Gabby’s guitar, the flowers that bring such a lovely energy to the living room, but most of all, you love seeing Gabby’s photo on the console table.
And so does Miguel.
You both stand in front of the console table for several minutes, simply admiring and thinking about her in silence.
A while later, you both sit on the rooftop of Miguel’s building, peacefully. You remember that it’s a work day and that both Miguel and you are technically “late” to work by now, but you say nothing. You’re certain Miguel already knows what time it is, and that if he wanted to, both of you would’ve already been there. It seems he’s okay with being late today.
He gazes at the sky, at the soft cloud formations, thinking and unworried about making it to HQ. He trusts that the rest of the team can handle the tasks, just a few more hours, without either of you.
After some time of peaceful silence, Miguel remembers.
“How’s reconstruction going for your building?” he asks.
“It’s almost done. I think in a week or two, we should get the okay to move back in.”
Miguel almost frowns, but he keeps the same look on his face. A week or two. His chest feels heavy all of a sudden and he wonders where time went.
“That’s… Good for the building, and everyone,” Miguel forces himself to say. Sure, he’s glad that everyone will be able to go back, that you’ll have your apartment once again - the one you love so much. Hell, even he misses the comfort and coziness from it, but… Why does the idea hurt him more than he thought it would?
He gulps. In a week or two you’ll be gone, back to your universe. He places his hand on the rooftop’s ground, accidentally brushing his fingers against yours.
“Sorry,” he apologizes instantly, worried he may have squeezed some of your fingers with his larger hand.
“It’s alright,” you reply with a smile, keeping your hand where it was, unbothered.
Miguel places his hand near yours, both of you silent and thinking about your upcoming return to your apartment.
A part of you is happy your place will be available again and yet… You sigh softly, staring at the clouds just like Miguel.
Neither of you say anything else about it, equally avoiding further conversation regarding the matter without knowing.
“I know it’s barely time, but what if we stay here for lunch?” Miguel says after a while. “A homemade lunch.”
“That sounds great,” you reply. “What do you feel like eating?”
“Hmm,” Miguel hums, thinking. “What are you up to?”
You laugh. “I’m up for anything.”
“That narrows it down a lot, thank you,” Miguel says sarcastically with a soft smirk.
“Happy to help,” you reply with your own little smirk.
God, he’s going to miss having you here, Miguel suddenly thinks. He forces himself to not think of that. Not again today. He clears his throat. “Let’s head back. It’s growing hotter. We can think inside of what to cook.”
You both slip back inside the penthouse, into the cool air.
“Maybe we can make some chilaquiles [Mexican dish]?” you offer, now in the living room.
“That’s an idea,” Miguel replies as you both stop in front of Gabby’s altar once more.
You both stare at it, the candle still on.
Slowly, you offer your pinky finger. A second later without hesitation, Miguel wraps his around yours.
“Thank you for sticking around,” he says quietly. “Despite my mood.”
“Always,” you reply. “No matter what.”
Miguel gives your pinky a hug with his own. “Always.”
A minute later, you both head to the kitchen to start prepping lunch, splitting up tasks to finish sooner, leaving Gabby’s altar in the living room.
The candle’s flame flickers and dances, peacefully.
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A/N: It's here!! The way life kept holding me back from writing this chapter?? But it's finally here :) I loved writing this one so much (I've loved writing every single chapter lets be real) but I've been planning the concept of you helping Miguel celebrate Gabby's birthday since part 3 when we first learned Miguel doesn't celebrate birthdays but instead, makes an ofrenda for his deceased loved ones. Can't believe we're already on part 17, or that we're even on a part 17 to begin with!
I'm going to make this as quick as possible because you've already given my fic and me so much time of your day/night, so... Some of you may or may not know but this month (July) will make one year since I started writing this story and writing fanfic again in general after several years. To be specific, I posted the first chapter on July 29th. 🥺
I seriously doubt that I'll have the next chapter by then, so I just wanted to take the time today to give you guys a huge THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart 🥹❤️ I say it again, and again, and again, but the support this story and my writing has received since I started writing fanfic again truly means so much to me!! I know I also say this a lot, but I genuinely didn't think many people would be interested to read this fanfic that initially was planned out to be only 3 or 4 parts long (lol). Almost a year later, I'm still writing and this story has turned into something so much more than I planned - so much bigger - thanks to you!! All the comments, the asks, the fanart, and you lovely people I get to interact with ... Wow!!! Never in my wildest dreams did I think I'd be back to writing fanfiction, much less have it be received and loved so much!! 🥹
Special thank you to every single artist who has created fanart of Nonviolent Communication!! If you read this, I hope you know that you've made me so incredibly happy, blessed, grateful, honored, and so much more - to see such beautiful art inspired by my fic. Each time a fanart has been posted, I've screamed and cried out of excitement, and that's not exaggeration. I am beyond thankful to have the privilege of saying there's fanart for something I've written (sometimes I'm still like "no way" fr). God - my hands are shaking rn and my chest feels fuzzy. I'm a bit emotional lol, sorry, but THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!! One day I may stop writing (I hope not) but please know I'm always going to cherish all the fanart (which is all saved in my computer and phone, and now tablet because it's that important to me)!!!!! 😭
I'm gonna end it here because as usual, I'm yapping in the author's note and also the tears are coming🫣 but please know, this means so much to me, and ily guys!!! Thank you for inspiring me to write for our fav Spider-Man, Miguel❤️
To celebrate a year, I'll be posting something regarding opening writing requests (for the first time) over the next week, so if you're interested, keep an eye out for my posts. I was trying to come up with something more exciting but that's all I could think of to celebrate!🤣
That's all. Thank you so much for reading again, and ily guys!! Take care!!
And for old time's sake, I still love Miguel O'Hara (even more)!!🥹
Alondra❤️
P.S. Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated!
taglist: @loverlorn @saturnknows @d1lf-loverrr @eddiestitmiguelsbigdick @freehentai @arithestrawberry @scaleniusrm @haradasaya @spidermanismyfav @bitchykittenconnoisseur @thecraziestcrayon @obi-mom-kenobi @natsury-kazuki @coraline750 @edgycatx @safixiovi @sunnyx07 @nxrdamp
@rorel1a @oceanstar19 @happishark @carmilla01 @somebodyelsethanyouthink @adora-but-ginger @angie2274 @vampi-amora @tired-writer04 @plzfeedmebread @shadow-pancake9 @tynakub @faretheeoscar @giulscomix @luvstuffies @coffeeauthorvibing @lauraolar14 @bl0osclues @pinkiemme @lil-cinn @mashiromochi @loveletterfrommwah @muzansucker @theleftkittycollection @kikookii @www-interludeshadow-com @holographicang3l @aisyakirmann @bucky-to-my-barnes @geraskier-thots @l3laze @yujyujj @taylorsmakingfuckingmacandcheese @damhanallagorm @heyohalie @kaliuea @moonsua1 @darksidescorner @geminis93 @1800-get-alife @hrrtkreuz @oharasfilipinawife @dropyoursocksandgrabyourcrocss @may4ri @t4naiis @f1-hoff @llumetrii
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coolingrosa · 22 days
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Sorry I'm sending in so many questions in a short time and ik I don't need to say sorry :p, but I thought in the video "What is RoseVerse", you said you'd be throwing out the continuity of the fanfic since stuff has changed since then? Or are you redoing the fanfic on top of the video episodes?
I was speaking about the old explanation doc and the old fanfic that focuses on teen nightmare! I decided starting with Nightmare was unneeded, and for the actual story, I jumped to when Killer gets introduced. However, that fic is still up as a prequel, as it holds important lore bits about Nightmare that make his actions in future chapters make much more sense.
What HAS changed is the video episodes- as my schedule as well as my co-writers has become hectic, and when first posting the pilot, the support given wasn’t enough interest to proceed. Rather than continue them, we’ve decided to stick to updating the fanfic and supplying lore heavy animatics to go along with them as well as comics that the remaining VAS who are now more friends than coworkers may jump on to voice. These people include the many that pop in on my YT lives, such as the iconic Kj Burbank, Artair, Null, Balladbeetle, Quinncosmos, TopSlimshady, MorganVa, and our Clementine and core frisk Va: Athenathebun and VreamusVa. The others have proceeded to their own on going projects!
Unfortunately, post ending production for future episodes, the support has skyrocketed, and now it’s a bit of a perplexing situation. I do have all the lines for episode two given, which would allow me to make animatics to certain scenes, but that’s only if I have the time and energy to do so. College is still a lot to get used to, and I definitely want to wait a bit before going with the idea of starting up the video series again. it’ll always be in the back of my mind with the hope that one day I can rehash it and begin the actual start of the video series, as the pilot is just that: the pilot! The test!
I know some may be disappointed to hear about this, and I understand. Just know that I empathize with you all and I’m sorry that circumstances have made it all complicated. But RoseVerse is not gone. I’m still very much creating for it, I just need to take a step back and find a way to regroup with other mediums!
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dialittlesandbox · 2 months
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Heya LMK Fandom!
I finally got my hands on all 5 Seasons of LMK and while watching S1, I started to wonder which characters/artifacts are from Journey to the West. Down the rabbit hole I go, starting a list that's all about that. For now I used a chapter summary as well as an Episodeguide, cause I haven't read the book yet and Overly Sarcastics Productions (YT channel) to start off and now a PDF of the translated version by Anthony C. Yu. (One of two full translations of Journey to the West) And while I go on and on, I think to myself, maybe somebody else would like to see that list as well, so I decided to post it here. Down below you find my sources and said list starting with the Pilot. I shall add more as I go on.
Scources: Episodelist on fandom.com Chapter Summaries of Journey to the West Overly Sarcastic Production Journey to the West PDFs of the Journey to the West 2012 Revised Edition by Anthony C. Yu
The following Template will be seen: Season, Episode: Name character/artifact - Chapter in Journey to the West Description in Journey to the West
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Pilot: Monkie Kid: A Hero is Born Monkie Kings Staff - Chapter 3 Description: After defeating "The Monsterous King of Harvoc" that'S been stealing monkies from Flower Fruit Mountain. Afterwards, the Monkey King decides that they'll need an army to defend themselves and he himself a weapon. So he visits the Dragon Palace in the Eastern Ocean and ask to "borrow" a weapon from that Dragon King. After much searching, Sun Wukong settles for a " heavy (17550 lbs or 7960,546 kg) magic size-changing iron pillar"
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Red Son - Chapter 40-42 Description: The Son of the Bull Demon King that's terrorising a mountain and the spirit population living there after spending years on training up his fire abilities. Now he can call upon the "true Fire of Samadhi" and was originally send there by DBK to guard the mountain. Monkey King fights him (after Red Son kidnaps Tripitaka), but with that fire on the demons side they call upon Guynyin to help out. Only then are they able to defeat Red Son and he is taken under Guynyin's care as a servant.
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Princess Iron Fan's Fan - Chapter 59-61 Description: After arriving at a mountain that is on constant fire (Fault of Monkey as one of the coals that were used to cook out the immortality pills off him got shot down and lit said fire when he escaped the coltr, the the pilgrims learn from the locals that they'll need the magical palm-leaf fan from Princess Iron Fan to extinguish said fire. The fan can produce such powerfull winds, that any who stand in it's way will be blown over 84 miles (135,1849 km).
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Princess Iron Fan/ Rakishasi - Chapter 59-61 Description: Wife of the Demon Bull King, the Princess was currently suffering under the absence of her husband and that her son is now a servant under Guynyin and she can't visit him. Those frustation she takes out on Monkey but can't defeat him but also refuses to give out her fan at first. At the end, she does give it up willingly, reflecting and coming to the conclusion that she wants a better life for herself. Monkey sees that she has "already worked her way up to a real human body*" and contiunes to better herself after.
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Demon Bull King - Chapter 59-61 Description: Leaving his wife, Princess Iron Fan, to guard Princess Jade Countenance - daughter of a tenthousend year old fox spirit, who was very rich and died. The princess offered all that money as a dowry to the Demon Bull King and he accepted. After causing sooo much trouble the entire celestial army comes to help out, Bull Demon King surrounders and is transported off.
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ramennoodlezzzao3 · 3 months
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nobody asked me to answer, but I’m gonna anyways 😝
🎱 ⇢ post your AO3 total stats 
Idk how to do that lol
🍓 ⇢ how did you get into writing fanfiction?
I couldn’t find any fics that I wanted bc I’m too specific, so I started writing. It was purely for fun and I wasn’t fully thinking about the fact that people might actually read it AND enjoy it lol
  🌵 ⇢ share the link to a playlist you love
me and some of my moots from TikTok created this playlist lol (it’s, like, 14 hours long)
🕯️ ⇢ on a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you enjoy editing? why is that? Idk what that means but ima go off of what I’m thinking and that is just editing while proof reading and I enjoy it! 10/10
🛼 ⇢ describe your latest wip with five emojis
🙏👉😁🔥💀 (no, it’s not abt the burning church 💀🙏)
🥑 ⇢ you accidentally killed somebody, which mutual(s) do you text for help?
I’m new here, I have no EXTREMELY close moots so idk. But @paul-ster seems pretty chill so probably them (
🥤 ⇢ recommend an author or fanfic you love
I HAVE SO MANY I LOVE! But if I had to choose rn Soracha for the author and “Ron Weasley and His First Year at Hogwarts” by snoopy_owl. Two of my favs!
💌 ⇢ how many unread emails do you have right now? 
none, believe it or not. I constantly check it for ao3 updates. But I also have three separate yt accounts so I get regular emails abt comments and updates and I normally check them everyday. The only exception is one email I use for spam sites like grammarly, that email has 408 unread emails.
🌻 ⇢ tag someone you appreciate but don't talk to on a regular basis
@fictionalcharactergraveyard
🐇 ⇢ do you prefer writing original characters, reader inserts, or a mix of both? 
ooo, neither tbh. Unless its a one-shot or a mini fic where I add a S/O or like my unpublished Uber fic where I had to add several OG characters, I don’t like adding new ones bc I think it disrupts the story a lot and I normally don’t read fics when people do that. And personally, unless it’s the ones that are supposed to be halrious and satire, I think self-inserts are kinda cringey bc most people who write them over-sexulize the characters and add weird stuff in that makes me cringe (key word: MOST not ALL) but also I just cant imagine myself dating someone let alone my comfort characters.
🧃 ⇢ share some personal lore you never posted about before
I don’t think I have any
🎲 ⇢ what stops you from writing more in your free time?
I just can’t get into the writing mood. But when I start it’s really hard to stop
  🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings
PURLY! I love to think Curly calls pony “Mi Amor” or like calls him pet names in Spanish. I think it’s really cute
🧸 ⇢ what's the fastest way to become your mutual?
literally don’t be fake as hell. Don’t be all shy and sweet like, if you are comeback or Yapping king/queen then tell me bc we can yap together. Like, If I can call you Pookie within the first four interactions, we are besties, considered us married at that point
🪐 ⇢ name three good things going on in your life right now
I’m redecorating my room, I got a new puppy, and- wait, bitch, who gives a fuck, let’s be honest 💀🙏
📚 ⇢ what's the last thing you wrote down in your notes app?
can’t say bc it’s an unpublished chapter of a on going fic 😝
  🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character
Harry Potter is kinda an ass
🔪 ⇢ what's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?
I don’t write anything too bizarre so I can’t think of anything
🦷 ⇢ share some personal wisdom or a life hack you swear on
strive to accomplish what you set as a goal, not what society set as a standard or a must
❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best?
My comfort character gets ignored hard core, makes new friends, get into shenanigans, and then a lot of angst ensues. Who would write it best? Mmm…Fictionalcharacter graveyard or Soracha
🌿 ⇢ give some advice on writer's block and low creativity
if you have a scene you want to write for a fic, start writing it but ONLY WRITE THE DIALOGUE. You can add who said it but I do it all the time and it gives me new ideas and gradually helps me continue a fic. It’s also easier to add detail in between when you are focused on that instead of getting to the next dialogue scene.
🥐 ⇢ name one internet reference that will always make you laugh 
Nick Sturniolos iconic “Then he will taste the rainbow while he goes out”
🏜️ ⇢ what's your favourite type of comment to receive on your work?
“I LOVE THIS, I CAN’T WAIT FOR ANOTHER CHAPTER!” Then they go on an entire yap session about how they think the fic will turn out or parts they’re excited for. It always makes me happy to see someone enjoy my hobby as much as I do even though we have different perspectives 🤭
🍦 ⇢ name three good things about a character you hate
Alr, ik im gonna get backlash but i cant stand Cherry Valence. 1. I will give it to her, she’s a downright badass.
2. her hair is really pretty
3. She was nice to pony at the drive in, I’ll give her some points (still don’t like her too much tho)
🥝 ⇢ do you lie a lot? what's the most recent lie you told?
Not much. Okay, this is gonna sound so fricking clique but that last lie I told was “Yeah, I’m fine, just tired” even though I know damn well I’m probably depressed asf
🦋 ⇢ share something that has been on your heart and mind lately
I have only older siblings and every time one moves out, I stop talking to them so I don’t become the annoying youngest sister, so I’m afraid their gonna forget about me, and they probably will. I only have two siblings that still live with me so that’s only two more people left to forget me before I’m totally alone lol. (Depressed, see?)
  🦴 ⇢ is there a piece of media that inspires your writing? 
book writers that can describe really well.
🍅 ⇢ give yourself some constructive criticism on your own writing
I think I’m too impatient and give myself an unrealistic deadline for stuff
🐚 ⇢ do you like or dislike surprises?
I like them a lot!
🪲 ⇢ add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here
I’ll add that later lol
☁️ ⇢ what made you choose your username?
it was a name my family wouldn’t be able to find. I’m embarrassed to write bc my family LOVES to pick out your insecurities and hobbies and never let you live them down.
🐝 ⇢ tag your biggest supporter(s) and say one nice thing about them
again, I’m new here, so nobody here is my “supporter” but @shae-pine has liked all of my posts so ig them? I got to say, that “The Youngest (The Favorite)” fic I really liked! Ur also just the sweetest person ever! 😭🫶🏻
🌸 ⇢ do you have any pets? if you do, post some pictures of them
I have 7 (I had 8 but my cat passed away yesterday, RIP in the comments for Sophie 🩵)
I won’t post pics because that’s a large file 😭🙏
🎨 ⇢ link your favourite piece of fanart and explain why you like it
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I DONT HAVE THE LINK BUT I LOVE THIS
🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?
self insert, too much OOC scenes, pairings I don’t like, oc’s/characters unless it’s the character I’m reading abt, pure smut or p*rn, over sexulization or romanticizing R*pe, over detailed non-con, specific characters are dead, and the fic doesn’t focus on a character that I wanna read about.
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bellshazes · 1 year
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my first two jobs ever, in order, were "board game teacher" and "university library assistant," so tho I've never formally studied games (I have been dropping out of college on and off since 2015, and was a freshman in 2012 lmao) I've been casually exposed to games and the people who make and play them in a professional context, as well as having the research skills to help close the gaps. i actually kind of hate playing board games but i loved GM-ing the coop arkham horror and watching my players, which i did for seven years straight.
my current fixation is the result of several years' fucking around on YT watching all kinds of game content, from LPs to specific game dissection to video essayists. jacob geller and folding ideas are kind of gold standards, but this week I've been really enjoying errant signals in particular. Sometimes I'm introduced to concepts this way - ludonarrative dissonance, ergodic literature, the magic circle, etc. that, and getting recommendations from friends or accidentally stumbling into game studies via other research (such as the paper i wrote a few years ago on theater-as-games in prison contexts). most of it though is having thoughts and opinions on things and letting it percolate until i am dangerous enough to find someone who's already explained a concept better than I could, and then running with that. find something that cites its sources, and then chase the ones that seem interesting.
my syllabus post is very much not a reclist, though i do in varying ways recommend everything on that list and it might be of use. here's some stuff I think would be great starting points:
Rules of Play - Game Design Fundamentals, Salen and Zimmerman. This book is an excellent resource, as it introduces a wide variety of scholars who you can dive into as it is relevant to your interests as well as providing tons of useful frameworks and vocabulary to go hunting. It's an easy read with concise bullet-point summaries after each chapter, and the PDF is hyperlinked for easy navigation. I might have found this via Wikipedia, honestly.
A Play of Bodies: A Phenomenology of Video Game Experience, Keogh. What I'm currently liveblogging - it is firmly a literary/philosophical work, rather than by/for designers, and correspondingly it's a little more difficult without at least passing familiarity with cyborg theory or any brand or offshoot of post-modernism, but still fairly digestible and a great read so far.
My Life as a Night Elf Priest: An Anthropological Account of World of Warcraft, Nardi. Found this during my theater-and-games paper, and MMO anthropology is not really my thing, but it's a nice complement to the other books as an explicitly player-theorist perspective. Also provides a more approachable introduction to a variety of theorists and sources. (Open access on JSTOR!)
Draw Your Weapons, Sarah Sentilles. I'm biased because I discovered this book by accidentally attending an author event at my local museum, and the games portion is incidental, but if you can find it I think this analysis of the relationship between depictions of violence and violence itself is worth your time. Memorable re: games for its discussion of Press F To Pay Respects.
here are some videos which I offer as examples of channels you might enjoy diving into, looking for additional jumping-off points:
Playing as Anyone in Watch Dogs Legion, Errant Signal. I really appreciate Errant Signal's thoughtful, personal approach to analysis and especially his highlighting of buried gems in his Blips series as well as his non-self-deprecating reevaluation of some of his older analyses over his decade plus career making videos.
Controllers Control Everything, Game Makers Toolkit. Discovered via the Boss Keys series highlighting the souls games, and although I think his channel is (increasingly) geared toward devs, these are well-constructed, thoughtful videos about many aspects of game design. Even when I don't personally get what makes him enjoy Zelda dungeons in that specific way (I'm an outlier), I appreciate his analysis.
Mega Microvideos 2, Matthewmatosis. Perhaps better known for his extremely long-form essays, I love Matthewmatosis' series of microessays framed like Wario Ware minigames. They are brief but don't pull punches, and the format is uniquely delightful. (See also this microessay mixtape.)
Making Sense of Catherine Full Body, SuperButterBuns. She doesn't do much essay content, I guess, but I she loves Catherine and the Persona series, and this dissection of Catherine Full Body is an absolute treat.
Jon Bois. Okay, mostly not about games, but like - come on. 17776 and Breaking Madden, alongside everything else he's ever done, fit because I feel like they do. If nothing else, I think Pretty Good and his general use of Google Earth as a medium for storytelling have a lot of utility in talking about digital media. He's good for the soul.
The Future of Writing About Games, Jacob Geller. One of the gold standards for a reason - and especially if you're looking for further solid recommendations for other writing/creating about games. This video in particular discusses & links to some really great pieces, but his Big List of Other People's Video Essays is also a great way to spend the next month of your life. (You might notice some crossover between this list and his, only some of which is coincidental.)
if i have any conclusion, it's that my current fixation on digital literalism is me finally finding an outlet/academic match-up with a fascination i developed in 2015 when studying gonzo lit. i think the utility of academia and the long history of scholarship on a given topic, as a non-academic, is to help you express ideas or reinterpret beliefs or experiences you've had to others without having to reinvent the wheel. i always become most energized when i stop worrying about knowing all the bg and chase whatever is useful and affirming or enlightening to me. and you can get pretty far if you think about why you like what you do, and just - enthusiastically also consume non-academic stuff. maybe this is a note more for myself! but thank you for the opportunity to monologue.
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khoicesbyk · 1 year
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Revenge.
A/N: This AU is a mashup of chapters from the new…ish book First Comes Love.
Book: First Comes Love
A/N 2: This book was cute until the LI got on my nerves. He's fine as all get out but oblivious as shit. So what happens when you decide to play his game? Read and find out!
A/N 3: In this series, you are the MC. So you get to experience all the emotional damage that comes along. Have fun!
Rated: Mature. | Contains sexual content and strong language. (You know? The usual from me. 😁) | Bolded and/or italicized words are conversations and thoughts of the characters. | Main Characters: Blake Marshall (LI) and Reader (MC) | All Characters and names: (except MC and original characters created by me) are property of Pixelberry.
Current Word Count: 8,825 words. (more or less. I stop counting after editing and re-editing. 🤷🏾‍♀️)
Tag List: @choicesficwriterscreations
If you’d like to be added to my tag list. Just reblog or dm me and I will gladly add you! 😁😘
This series is rated Mature. It is NOT reading material that is safe for those under 18. Reader discretion is STRONGLY advised!
Chapter 1.) Two Can Play That Game.
It was supposed to be the friend's trip of a lifetime. It was supposed to be you, Lino, Eve, and the finest black man in the world, Blake Marshall. Your man in your head and your heart, which makes sense given how you had always wanted him for years.  
He is pure chocolate perfection in human form. No man can touch him in the looks department, not even Adonis himself. All alone in Big Bear.  It would be perfect.  That's what it was supposed to be. 
But it wasn't.
Because Blake has a girlfriend.  And you're sitting here like "Where the hell did this spicy YT come from?" Ugh!  She's killing the whole vibe of your trip. And the fact her name is Rebecca?  If only the gods could take you now.
Becky with the straw hair has been doing everything she can to make you jealous. And sadly, it's starting to work. Every day that you've been at the resort she's had her mayo-flavored hands all over him and it's gotten harder and harder to resist the urge to bash her skull in.
She was always giggling at jokes she never heard before, speaking with ebonics she had never grown up with, and wearing trends that she had never made.
The lack of authenticity was becoming too much.  Not just because of her, but because he acts so oblivious. Like he doesn't see you standing in front of him, ready to give him everything he wants and desires. 
You know he's not in love with her and he knows he's not in love with her. And yet here we are. You have to watch them together and it's making you sick. There is no way this fine specimen of a man should be with any woman who wasn't you.
It's frustrating as all Hell. But hey, you're a Scorpio - an October Scorpio, which means you know how to use others' emotions to your advantage.
Enter Sky, your latest chess piece.
It was half serendipity and half he nearly capsized you and your friends with his huge yacht while all of you were out on the lake.  To make up for it he invited you all onto the yacht and immediately flirted with you.  And you wouldn't have cared for Sky until you caught a glance at Blake's face. 
He was jealous and failed at hiding it, which made you giddy. He clearly didn't like you talking to Sky, and you liked that.  
How dare you give attention to any man other than him? You were his. The one little starving rabbit only he could dangle a carrot in front of. That little smile on your face? Only meant for him. The way you tucked your hair behind your ear? You only did that for him. 
Well, not today. Today, you are gonna have some fun at his expense. After all, all's fair in love and war, right? 
Sky might not have been the finest man in the world, but since being around him was making Blake miserable, you could fuck him with your eyes closed. You spent that whole afternoon with Sky. You didn't know which was better - Blake being jealous or the fact he was actively ignoring little miss spicy white to focus on your conversation with Sky. When Sky absentmindedly put his hand on your thigh you spared a look at Blake, and he looked sick to his stomach. You couldn't help but smile to yourself. 
You were coming out of the lower deck bathroom when you ran smack into Blake.
"So, you and Sky huh?" he asked with an eyebrow raised. 
You roll your eyes at him, "Hello to you too, Blake."  Goddamn, he looks amazing. 
"You didn't answer my question."
"We're just talking," you reply. 
"Y'know he does have other guests and his friends."
"I'm not forcing him to talk to me, Blake. But gee thanks for accusing me of doing something that I'm not." you snap at him. 
His features soften. 
"Okay, I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to offend you."
You smirk at him.
"Don't let it happen again, Marshall."
Blake shook his head and flashed that pretty smile as he leaned against the door frame. 
"He's not your type you know," Blake said to you.
"Excuse me?" you ask.
"Sky. He's not your type," he replies, doubling down.  Fuck, his boldness was sexy.
"And how would you know?" you ask.
"Because I know you. And I know that you want and deserve someone who will treat you right. Someone who will care for and about you. And Sky isn't that guy." he replies. 
"What are you saying, Blake?"
"I'm saying that you have a type. And Sky isn't your type."
He's not wrong. But you can't exactly tell him he's right either.
"And you think you know my type?" you ask, smirking up at him. 
Blake leaned in closer tilting your chin up so you're looking into those pretty brown eyes. 
"Of course. You're an amazing woman. You deserve the world. You deserve someone who will treat you like a Queen. Someone who would care for you. Someone who would realize how delicate you are. Someone who would be gentle with your heart. Someone who would always tend to your every want, need, and desire. Sure he's gotta be aesthetically pleasing to you. But he'd have to realize and know how lucky he is to have you in his life. Like I always have." he replied.
It is taking every bit of restraint in you to not drag him into that tiny bathroom and have your way with him.
"You feel lucky to have me in your life?" you ask.
"Yes Y/N I'll always be thankful to have you in my life," he replies.
"But not in your bed...," you think.
"I know. And I'm thankful for you too," you say to him.
Just when you think he's going to say more, laughter from above deck startles you both. He steps back and smiles at you sheepishly.
"We should uh...get back above deck," he says to you.
"Yeah. Let's go," you say back.
You let him go up first before taking a deep breath and then joining others above deck. That's when Sky pulled you aside. 
"Hey Y/N. Are you busy tomorrow?" he asked.
"No, I'm not. Why?" you replied.
"Whaddaya say we go out on a date?"
And before you can answer, Blake pipes up.
"What's this now?" he asked.
"Oh! I just asked Y/N if she'd like to go out on a date with me." Sky replies.
"You did?" Blake asks him.
"Yeah, he did. I was just about to give him an answer when you two walked up," you reply.
"You know I think it would be nice for Y/N and Sky to go out. It'll give the rest of us a chance to spend some time together." little miss spicy YT chimes in with a smirk.
Bitch, nobody asked you.
"You know what babe? You're right. It would be nice for them to go out. As long as they don't mind us tagging along." Blake agrees with her. 
You watched the smirk on her face fall.
"Us?" she asked him.
"Yeah. I'm Y/N's wingman. I can't let her go on a date by herself." Blake replies.
"That's a great idea! I'm down for a double date. If that's alright with you Y/N." Sky added.
They all look at you and you shrug helplessly.
"Sure. I'm good with it." 
"Awesome! We can't wait. Right, babe?" Blake asks Becky.
"Yeah...great," she replies.
You never thought you'd wind up in a situation where Blake would be jealous and it would work in your favor but here you are. On a double date with Sky, Blake, and Becky with the straw hair. You rode horses up a trail that Sky had been on dozens of times. You played it up like you were hanging off his every word. 
Occasionally you looked over to see Blake stone-faced as his little plaything droned on and on about whatever and nothing. It was eating him alive to watch you enjoy Sky and you loved it. The date, while severely awkward at times, was decent. Sky is a great guy, but Blake was right. He's not your type. 
"So what's the deal with you and Blake?" Sky asks you, catching you off guard.
"Nothing. We're just friends," you reply.
Sky chuckled. 
"Friends don't jealously demand to go on an awkward double date."
You winced. 
"That obvious?" you ask.
"It was obvious yesterday. It was just painful today," he replies.
You shake your head. 
"I'm sorry Sky. You're a great guy. It's just..." you trail off.
"No need to apologize. I get it."
"And please don't think I was trying to use you. I did have fun with you. Lost horse, picnic, and all."
"It was a pleasure. And for what it's worth if he can't see what he has with you then he's not only blind but he's an idiot. Any man would kill for a woman like you."
You felt the heat under your cheeks.
"Even you?" you ask.
"Most definitely. Matter of fact my friends and I are going to a bonfire up the road Friday. I'd love for you to go with me." he replies.
"Can my friends come?" you ask.
"Of course, even them," he replies nodding towards Blake and Rebecca.
"We'll be there." 
"Good," he says to you, "and for what it's worth I hope you get your man. But in the meantime, since your goal is to make him jealous, I know the part to play."
You regard him in a whole new light right before he helps you dismount. There's a look of trouble in his eye. Perhaps a fellow Scorpio-in-crime can be useful.
"I'll see you Friday, Y/N," he says as he hands you a small piece of paper with his number on it. 
You kiss him on the cheek right in front of Blake as you hand him your number. 
"See you Friday, Sky."
You watch him take the horses back to the stables and suddenly feel a little warm. And for the first in your life, that warmth didn't come from being around your future husband. As you walk back into the resort with Blake and Becky, Lino comes running up to the three of you. 
"Well?! How was it?" Lino asked.
"Oh, it was gre—" Becky started to reply before Lino cut her off, "not you! I was talking to Y/N!"
You snickered to yourself.
"I had a good time. Sky is a great guy. Oh! And he invited us to this bonfire Friday." you reply.
"He did?" Blake asks.
"Yeah, well he initially invited me and I asked if my friends could come," you reply.
"That's a great idea! Nothing like drinking and bonfire marshmallows to bring the gang together!" Lino piped up, "Right Blake?"
"Yeah. It's a wonderful idea." Blake deadpanned.
The envy in his tone made you hot inside. He is going to pay for flaunting his little friend in your face. 
"Well, we should all rest up for Friday.  The bonfire is gonna be fun and most of us need our beauty sleep," you comment, your eye briefly drifting over to Becky.
"You mean all of us, right?"  Becky asked.
"Right. My apologies," you say in the same sugary sweet tone.
__
Friday could not have come fast enough.
Your dress had already been picked; a bodycon in canary yellow, which bounced nicely on your brown skin. It hugged your body and accentuated all your curves. None more than the curves of your breasts. It paid to not wear a bra with this dress. With your hair in a slicked-back ponytail, and one final check of your makeup and jewelry. You slipped your wedges on and were out the door and down the hall to meet the others. 
Blake looked fine as fuck. He had that cheap ass watch Becky brought him on his wrist, but it was offset by the crisp white shirt, black jeans, and Nike sneakers he had on. He had those beautiful dreads pulled back and made you weak in the knees. And he smelled delicious thanks to that Gucci cologne you bought him for Christmas last year. 
Becky tried to copy you but couldn't. Her bodycon dress was red, and not a sexy wine red. She looked like a melted cherry slushy.  
"Hey girl," Becky greeted, exaggerated blaccent on full display.  "Hi," you said with a fake smile as she hugged you.
"You look so good. I love your weave too."
It took everything in you not to snatch that fake hair piece off her head. She knows good and damn well you are not wearing a weave. 
"Thanks, boo. Yours looks nice too."
She smiled and you almost felt blinded by the fake gold chain around her neck.
That silver on her tooth didn't help either. That fucking cap could help planes land.
"We ready to go?"  Blake asked.
"Oh yeah, baby," Becky responds, linking his arm with hers, "You know I'm always ready to go wit' you."
If Lino wasn't standing beside you holding onto your arm, you would've shanked the bitch. She was working your last goddamn nerve. 
As you all headed to the bonfire, Blake stared at your ass. Even with Blaccent Barbie next to him, he couldn't help watching the way your ass moved in that dress.
___
The bonfire was lovely, as expected. The setting sun made the burning embers look like a stock photo, the food, the wine, the music. It was all so relaxing and fun.  
"Don't you look beautiful?"  Sky greets you, pulling you to him and kissing your cheek.
"You look mighty fine too," you replied.
"I do clean up good," Sky responded, showing off his red shirt and shorts,  "Your friends look good too. I'm glad you all could make it."
"Thanks for inviting us. Now if you lot will excuse me! The fire pit is calling my name!" Lino says before disappearing into the crowd. 
"And while he's off to roast marshmallows, I'm going to drink. Toodles!" Eve says before heading to the makeshift bar.
You look over at Blake and Ms. Milk of Magnesia as they go get snacks.
"Stop looking so desperate," Sky whispers to you.
"They're all over each other," you sigh, "My plan isn't working."
"That's because you're acting interested and Blake can smell it. Men don't appreciate women when they're sweet. They want the bitches."
You nod as you finally tear your eyes away from them.
"Dance with me."
"What?" 
He holds you closer, pressing your body flush to his.
"Dance with me."
The look in his eyes is kinda hot. You nod and he leads you to the dance floor. 
"Carlos! Play a little bachata!" Sky called out to his friend behind the DJ booth.
"Sky, I don't know how to dance bachata."
"Just follow my lead."
The music changed and the bodies around them started to sway. You were surprised at how well Sky knew how to dance. His movements were fluid and his hips definitely do not lie. You two took over the dance floor. His hand on your right hip was warm and slightly intoxicating. 
"Feel better?"
"Yes."
"Good."
He spun you around so your back was flush to his chest and his arms were around you. When you looked up, Blake was looking at you as he danced with his walking jar of mayo. Your feet started to hurt so you and Sky took a break and grabbed something to drink.
"You are full of surprises, Sky. Where did you learn to dance like that?" 
"Gracias, mami.  Mi Abuela would be mortified if I didn't know how to dance to Bachata."
"You're Latino?" 
"Afro-Latino actually. My mamí is Black and my Papí is Dominican."
"Curiouser and curiouser."
He snorted. 
"My dad wanted me to grow up knowing both sides of where I come from. I've never felt ashamed of being biracial.  It is a part of me, just as perfection is a part of you."
"Stop before you make me blush."
"I'll do a lot more than that if you'll let me."
Just as you were about to answer, here comes your husband and his mangy Chihuahua.
"Well, you got off the dance floor quick."
Why does her voice sound like nails on a chalkboard?
"Needed a break and a drink." Sky replies.
"Nice moves there, Sky," Blake pipes up.
"Thanks, man. Stick around and I might teach you a few more."
You had to hide your smirk behind your glass.
"Don't mind him, babe. I think you dance divinely." 
"I think I'm good but thanks anyway, Sky."
Sky shrugged. 
"Suit yourself."
"Hey babe. Let's go grab a bite to eat."
"Okay."
They left just as you finished your wine. 
Sky snickered slightly and you playfully glared at him, "That was naughty."
"Me? Naughty? I was simply being polite," Sky purred with a shit-eating grin.
"You're such a Scorpio."
"Takes one to know one, baby."
You smirked as he sipped his drink, "So, what do you wanna do now?"
Sky smirked and looked around, "Watching all these people shake their ass around a fire...mixed with all these drinks, and then seeing you in that dress...I think you know what I wanna do."
"Do tell."
He leans in so close that you can smell the alcohol on his breath. 
"There's a waterfall not too far from here. Maybe after the party winds down I can show it to you."
You give him a Cheshire Cat grin.
"I'd love that."
"Good. In the meantime, care for another dance?"
You take his hand and head back to the dance floor. After several rounds of dancing and drinking, you were buzzed. Throughout the dancing, you swear you can feel his lips on your neck. As the night wound down you weren't sure if it was the moonlight on his skin or the alcohol in your system, but Sky was starting to look almost as fine as your man.
"You ready to go?" he whispered in your ear.
"Lead the way." 
You slip one hand in his and carry your shoes in the other. He led you deep into the woods. You were unaware that you were being followed by Blake. After convincing Lino and Eve to take the mayo jar back to the resort, he took off after you and Sky. He wanted to make sure you were safe. It's not that he doesn't trust you. Because of his jealousy, he doesn't trust Sky. 
You and Sky were giggling and chatting all the way down the moonlit path. When you got to the waterfall you were in awe. It was breathtaking. Sky softly wrapped his arms around your waist. 
"Beautiful."
He nuzzled your neck.
"Yes, you are."
You turned around in his arms to look into his eyes. The lustful look he gave you sent chills down your spine.
"I love this dress on you, mamí. But I've been dying to get you out of it," he whispered in your ear. His low husky voice made you bite your bottom lip. 
"Then take it off, Papí," you whisper back. Your tone matched his. 
"Como desées," he said to you before capturing your lips. 
Much to your surprise his lips were soft. His hands went from your hips to squeezing and palming your ass through your dress. This is what you craved. You wanted and craved attention. And although he might not be your man, Sky is willing to give you the attention you deserve. With his lips still on yours he walked you back toward the side of the waterfall. 
With the waterfall roaring beside you, you both grabbed at each other's clothes. Desperate to feel the heat of each other's skin. Sky yanked your dress off, freeing your breasts and exposing your nipples to the cool air. Sky looked down and marveled at you.
"Tan Hermosa mamí." he whispered before taking your right nipple into his mouth. 
While his mouth worked your right nipple, he used his left hand to play with your left breast. You arched your back off the stone behind you. The sensation of his warm mouth and the cool mist of the waterfall was sending you. When he finally pulled your panties down you were in heaven. 
You thought it was the daze you were in. Because you swore you could make out the shape of something moving just behind the trees. When your eyes finally adjusted that's when you saw Blake. 
"Sky wait. Blake is here," you manage to breathe out.
Sky stopped.
"You serious?"
"I don't think he realizes that I saw him."
"He wants to see you so let him. Let him watch what I do to you, and what he's missing." 
The tone in Sky's voice was all the confirmation you needed, and with shocked enthusiasm, you nodded.
"Now if you'll excuse me. I wasn't finished."
With his left hand around your neck to keep you in place, Sky went back to what he was doing. He kissed down your stomach, letting his tongue swirl and play with your belly button piercing. 
When he got to the top of your panty line, he stuck his thumb in his mouth before slipping it between your thighs and putting it directly on your throbbing clit. He rubbed your clit in small circles. Driving you crazy. Whimpering for more.
"Please..." you pleaded. 
He nursed your breast as he slowly rubbed your clit. You were on such a high you forgot Blake was watching you and Sky. He pulled his thumb away from you and held two fingers to your lips. 
"Suck. Now." 
You took his fingers into your mouth. Greedily sucking and licking until they were drenched with your saliva. He pulled his fingers from your mouth just to rub them along your wet entrance. You felt him plunge his fingers inside you. 
"Yessssssss!!" you cried out. 
He wrapped his right hand around your neck and squeezed as his fingers worked you over. He was quenching your thirst yet you still felt dehydrated. While Blake is your endgame, even you had to admit that Sky was pretty good in the meantime. He knew how to take care of you. 
You dug your fingernails into the rocks behind you trying to ride the building orgasmic wave. 
"Sky..." 
"Sí, así es mi amor. Tell me what you want," he whispered in your ear.
"I...want your mouth. I want you to taste me." you breathed out.
"Con gusto mami."
He trailed open-mouth kisses down the length of your body. With a wink, he threw your legs over his shoulders and feasted. With one hand braced on the rocks behind you and the other behind his head, you braced yourself.
He used his tongue to open your very slick folds to him. When his mouth found your clit it was like heaven had opened up to you. He felt good. So good. He was licking and sucking like a panther in heat. 
He drove his tongue inside you causing you to nearly fall apart. You grabbed his head and smothered his face with your pussy. This went on for what seemed like forever. And just as you were about to hit your peak he stopped.
"No! Please!" you plead. 
"Paciencia mami. obtendrás lo que quieres."
He continued to lap at you. Tasting, licking, and sucking on your most sensitive parts. It was becoming too much. 
"Oh God! I can't stand it anymore! I want you inside me! I need you inside me!" you begged. 
Hearing you beg damn near made him lose it.
"Not yet mamí. Not until I feel those pretty lips wrapped around my dick," he responded.
You can't believe this. You were about to cum and now you have to hold it to suck him off. 
He let you go and you slid to the ground before you swallowed his dick whole. He closed his eyes and slowly exhaled. He looked down and watched you suck him off. And off in the distance so did Blake.
To Sky you were intoxicating. He loved watching you swirl your tongue around his dick. Slowly going from tip to base and base to tip. Your mouth was warm, soft, and wet. 
You made sure not to neglect his balls. He watched them go in and out of your pretty mouth. When he looked over to the tree line, he saw Blake anchored in place watching you two. When he looked down to see your head bobbing back and forth his lips formed a wicked smirk. 
"Look at me mamí. I wanna see that pretty face and those pretty eyes as you suck me off." he moaned. 
Once you made eye contact with him he nearly lost it.
"Sí mami así. Keep your eyes on me." 
His voice was husky and shuddering. 
"Oh Fuck! Fuck yes! Mamí! Just like that! Show me who you are! ¡Dios esto se siente tan bien!"
Hearing him speak to you in Spanish was kinda hot. Just imagine how hot it will be when Blake finds out you're a throat goat. 
Sky was about to lose it but he knew he wanted to take you right in front of Blake. So just before he was about to cum he pulled out of your mouth. He grabbed the condom out of his pocket and bent you over the boulder next to you. He nodded to Blake with a teasing smirk, before he rammed his dick into your waiting pussy. You shrieked as he began banging you out. 
Good God this man was giving it to you so good he made your future husband's blood boil. 
Blake couldn't stand the thought of another man having his hands all over you. Especially like this. But what could he do? He has an obligation to his girlfriend. You don't. You were barely hanging on as Sky willingly gave you everything that you wanted and craved, everything Blake never gave you. 
Sky latched onto your hips for dear life as he took your hungry pussy. You were in heaven as was he. 
"Sí mami así. Take this dick! Take! Me!" he said to you through gritted teeth.
He would fill you up. Letting you feel him throbbing inside before pulling out and slamming himself back in. Over and over again. He was hitting your spot with precision. Your hair was stuck to your back thanks to the spraying from the waterfall.
"Yes! Give it to me! Fuck me! I need this! I need you!" you scream. 
Blake ruBbed harder, imagining it was him between your legs.
You clawed at the boulder underneath you. Desperate to feel Sky swallow you whole. 
"Sí asi es mi amor. You feel so good. You're so tight! ¡Tómalo mi amor!" 
Hearing the way he spoke to you as he took you continued to make Blake's stomach twist. But he couldn't stop watching. Sky was just about there, and so were you.
"Mi amor estoy tan cerca. I can't hold on much longer!" he said through gritted teeth. He wasn't the only one. 
You were at your peak. You just needed that little pu0sh. He pulled you close so that your back was flush with his chest. He got a good firm grip on your breasts and his mouth was attached to the crook of your neck as he pumped into you a few good times. When he thrust into you one last time and that was all she wrote for the two of you. Your eyes glazed over like a Krispy Kreme Doughnut as you gave into your shattering orgasm. With Sky not too far behind you. 
As you came down from your delicious climax you looked over to see if Blake was still there and he wasn't. You started to wonder how much Blake saw and what he thought. You didn't wonder for long thanks to Sky breaking your thoughts as he pulled you close to him.
"Well that was fun." he breathed out.
"Definitely. You have made quite the impression sir."
He placed featherlight kisses on your neck.
"Gracias mami. I always aim to please."
"If that's the case why are you single?" you ask.
"I could ask you the same question." 
"Touche."
He noticed you shivering so rubbed on the inside of your thighs to create some warmth.
"Ooh! If you don't stop," you warned him playfully.
"¿Te gusta esa mamí?" he whispered in your ear.
"I will have you know that my Spanish is horrible."
He chuckled before nibbling on your neck.
"Do you like that?" 
"Very much so."
"Good. Now it's getting late. And we should get back to the resort."
"Okay." 
The two of you slipped on your damp clothes and then walked back to Sky's truck and headed back to the resort.
–—
The next morning dawned bright and early as you made your way to the breakfast buffet. You grabbed two plates and had just finished filling them up when Blake and Tartar Sauce walked up.
"Well, you have a little pep in your step," it says to you.
"Well yeah. I had a great time with Sky last night."
"Oh? And what did the two of you do?"
"He took me to a secret waterfall near the bonfire. It was so pretty."
You noticed that Blake was decidedly quiet.
"And what did you two last night, Marshall?" 
"Nothing. We came back and went to bed."
Liar.  But you'll be nice and not expose him for now.
"That's a lot of food for one person. Are you really gonna eat all that?" Tartar Sauce asks.
"Oh!  Only one of these plates is mine. The other is for Sky."
Yours was piled high with waffles, strawberries and bacon on the side.  Sky's had french toast, eggs and ham.
That caught your hubby's attention.
"Wait! He's here?" he asks. 
"Yeah. We got in pretty late last night and I didn't want him walking back to his room in the dark, so I told him he could stay with me." 
Though he tried, Blake once again failed at hiding the look of jealousy on his face.
"Well, I have a breakfast delivery to make. You two have a good one," you say as you grab some apple and orange juice then head back to your room. 
As you walked away, you could feel Blake's eyes staring holes into your ass. 
You purposely spent the whole day with Sky. Flaunting it in Blake's face the same way he'd been flaunting Tartar Sauce in yours. Going on the resort zipline, playing court volleyball, learning and failing to play cricket, and so much more all while Blake watched helplessly. Occasionally you would wave or wink at him. You were teasing him and it was working. 
That night you were getting ready for a midnight swim that Sky had planned. You were just about to get dressed when there was a knock on the door. It was Blake.
"Hey. You got a minute?" he asks.
You nod before letting him in. He is looking scrumptious. But you can't let yourself get distracted. Not yet. He sits down on your bed before looking at you in your robe.
"What's with the robe?" 
"Going swimming."
"I thought the pool closed at 9:30 every night."
"It does." you say as you grab your lotion bottle, "but Sky called in a favor with the owner and we're going on a late-night swim."
Blake made a face and you caught it. 
"What was that?"
"What was what?"
"Your face."
"What about my face?"
He's trying to work your nerves. Like he always does.
"You made a face! Now why did you make a face?"
"I didn't make a face."
"Yes, you did. You made a face when I said Sky and I are going swimming."
He sighs.
"What do you know about this guy anyway?" 
You look at him sideways.
"Why do you care?"
"Just answer the question Y/N."
No, he didn't.
"Well for starters I know he has a big family," you say as you start putting on lotion.
Blake watches you intently as you slowly massage your lotion into your skin. Especially your legs.
"How big?"
"Bigger than both of ours. His mom's name is Priscilla, and his dad's name is Alphonso. His last name is Fernandez. He has an older brother named AJ. And he is a twin. And he has two twin little sisters."
"He's a twin?"
"Yeah. Sky is actually his nickname. His real name is Ezra and his twin's name is Issac. And his sisters' names are Ashley and Erica."
"Is that all?"
"Nope. His dad is the Fire Chief of Santa Clarita County. And his mom is a pediatrician. His older brother AJ is a senior analytics executive at Google. His twin owns an architecture firm in San Diego. And his sisters own a bakery together in Seattle. Oh! And you two share the same birthday."
"WHAT?!"
"Yup. You and Sky share the same birthday of 11/12."
"Nope! Nope! Nope! Dealbreaker! You are only allowed ONE November Scorpio in your life and that's me."
"You're so possessive."
"Of course I am! It's MY birthday!"
Blake groans before laying back on your bed you took advantage of the situation and straddled him. He looked up at you through his fingers. 
"Poor Marshall! Doesn't like sharing his birthday." you teased. You weren't quite sure but you could've sworn you felt a rise in his jeans.
He huffs.
"So you learned all that about him today?" 
He's avoiding the CLEARLY oversized elephant in the room.
"Yes. He's a great guy. Fun to be around." 
"Even though he's not your type?"
"Why are you so obsessed with who or what my type is?"
"Because I need to know that he can be trusted." 
"With all due respect Marshall, that's not your job."
"Yes, it is. I look out for you and you look out for me. Like always."
"You have a girlfriend Blake. If I want to see as many guys as possible then that's what I'm gonna do. So why do you care what I'm doing?"
"Do you like him?" 
"Like" is a strong word. We're just having fun, that's all." 
Blake sat up on his elbows with an eyebrow raised.
"So is Stars the one?"
What is with this line of questioning? 
"First off, his name is Sky. And second, I don't know. Why?"
"Call me curious."
"You mean nosy."
"I'm not being nosy Y/N. I'm being vigilant."
"But why?"
"Because I don't want you to wind up in another bad relationship."
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?!"
"I'm not trying to go through another Derek situation with you."
"Excuse me?"
"Don't take this the wrong way but you don't have the best track record when it comes to men and dating." 
You stare at him in shock.
"Are you fucking serious?!"
"I'm sorry. That didn't come out right."
You scoff as you climb off of him.
"No, it came out perfectly clear. I can't believe you would throw that in my face!"
"I didn't mean it like that, Y/N."
"You know what?! Get out! Just go!"
"Y/N wait please!" 
"No! Get out! Since you think you're so fucking funny! Get! Out!"
He got up off your bed and gently grabbed your right elbow to stop you.
"Let go, Blake!"
"Please wait!"
"I said let go!" 
"Y/N I'm sorry. I swear I didn't bring it up to hurt you."
You just stood still. Hurt, angry, and resisting the urge to turn around and kiss him. That's when he wrapped those strong arms around your waist. When you felt his beard on your shoulder, you wanted to die in his arms.
This man was toying with you. And what's worse is you were letting him. You felt his arms tighten around you. You closed your eyes in hopes that it would stop your pounding heart. 
"Are you still mad at me?"
"Yes. I can't believe you."
"Again I didn't mention him to hurt you. I swear. I mentioned him to make a point."
You scoffed. 
"And what point is that?"
He took a deep breath.
"You have a tendency to listen to and lead with your heart. And I've seen firsthand what that can do to you. Derek is proof of that."
"You're comparing apples to oranges. Sky isn't anything like Derek."
"Maybe, maybe not. But you don't know that much about him. And I'm not trying to see you get hurt again."
"Whether or not I get hurt is my lesson to learn. Not yours. I get it you were there. You and Lino helped me move out of his place and move on from him and I am and always will be thankful to you for that. But it doesn't give you the right to throw one of the worst times of my life in my face."
"You're right. And again I'm sorry. I just wanted to make a point. That's all."
"Point painfully taken and noted."
He nuzzled your shoulder as he held you closer.
"How can I make sure that my #1 girl isn't mad at me anymore?"
"I thought your mom was your #1 girl."
"Okay how can I make sure my #1b girl isn't mad at me anymore?" 
You shook your head with a small smile.
"You're a mess."
"Messy messy me." he sings off-key.
Whether or not you wanted to admit it, you enjoyed this. You enjoyed being in his arms. 
"Still mad?"
One thing about Blake Marshall, he was relentless.
"No, not anymore."
"Finally! I got scared that I would have to serenade you."
You snorted.
"There is something you can do for me."
"Name it."
"Put lotion on my back?"
Blake grabbed your lotion bottle before gesturing to you to lie down on your bed. You laid down on your stomach and then felt his strong hands going up and down your back. Massaging in the lotion. It felt so good to feel his hands on you. You let out a small moan. You couldn't help it. His hands are blessed with magic.
Thankfully, Blake didn't hear you. Or at least you hoped he didn't. When he was done, all you wanted to do was fuck him in your bed.
"And done!"
"Thank you. Now beat it. I have to finish getting ready. I will meet Sky in a few."
"Just be careful Y/N. Can you do that for me?"
"Yes, dad. I'll be careful. Now go."
He shook his head and smiled softly at you before he left. This game of cat and mouse is starting to make him crack. And it was delicious to watch. 
You finished getting ready and then headed to the lobby. When you got there Sky and Blake were talking while Lino was on the phone with Felicia. The men stopped when you walked up. 
And you couldn't quite see it but you could've sworn that both guys were drooling over what you had on. You had on a military green one-piece with cutouts in all the right places, a white see-through top, and dark denim booty shorts. 
Sky was the first to speak.
"¡Ay dios mío! Te ves hermosa mamí," he says as he goes in for a hug.
"I do believe I've told you that my Spanish is hilariously bad."
"You look beautiful."
"Yeah, you do clean up nice." Blake pipes up. 
You smirked. 
"Well thank you both. I appreciate it."
Lino noticed how flirty you were being with Sky and decided to play along. 
"Since we're in a resort, why don't you two lovebirds get a room? I heard they're quite reasonable here."
You shook your head at him as Sky slipped his hand into yours.
"You ready?"
"Yeah. Let's go."
"You two have a good night," Sky said to the boys before the two of you walked outside. Blake stood there with his jaw set as he watched and Lino noticed. 
"Look at our girl Blake. She's all grown up and going on midnight rendezvous with guys. Isn't it romantic?" 
"Yeah totally romantic," Blake replied flatly.
"What's wrong with you?" 
"Nothing."
"You sure? Because it sounds like something."
"Can you just drop it, Lino?"
Lino looked at him. 
"Do my eyes and ears deceive me or is Blake Marshall jealous?" 
"I'm not jealous, Lino."
"You sure? Because you look pretty salty from where I'm standing."
Blake ran a hand down his face. 
"I don't trust him," he admitted. 
"Why?"
"We don't know anything about him!"
Lino snickers to himself.
"Awwww! Poor Blake! You're jealous! Which is kinda ironic considering Y/N is single and you're not." 
That stung. 
"I don't have to be single to care about her."
"Uh huh."
"He's not even her type Lino!"
"And why do YOU care what her type is?"
"Because."
"Because what?" Lino asks.
Blake sighed. 
"I might've screwed up."
"What did you do?" Lino asked before he took a swig from his water bottle.
"I mentioned Derek."
Lino choked and sputtered. 
"YOU DID WHAT?!"
"I wasn't trying to be mean I swear! I was just trying to make a point."
"By mentioning Dickhead of The Decade? What is wrong with you?!"
"You know how she is when she starts to fall for someone. I'm not trying to see her get her hopes up."
"While I understand that, I'm still trying to figure out why you would mention Derek of all people." 
"She doesn't exactly have the greatest track record in men."
"So you thought it was a good idea to remind her of that?"
Lino shook his head.
"I don't know why she didn't but if it were me I would've decked you."
"And I probably would've deserved it."
"Deserved what?" Eve asked as she walked up.
"Becky asleep?" Blake replies.
"Yup. She dozed off halfway through the movie. Now what is it you would've deserved?"
"Boy scout over here thought it was a good idea to tell Y/N that she has a horrible taste in men by reminding her of Derek. Aka Dickhead of The Decade!" Lino complained. 
"Blake you didn't!"
"I wasn't trying to be cruel!" Blake replies with his eyes closed.
"I don't know mentioning her ex from hell sounds pretty cruel to me." 
"Thank you!" Lino pipes up.
"Alright! I get it! I screwed up! You two don't have to keep piling on." 
"No, you fucked up Blake. And you need to fix it." Eve said to him.
Blake sighed. 
"After all of this, I need a drink. Eve you coming?" Lino asked.
"Right behind you," she replied.
Blake watched them head to the bar before looking toward the doors leading to the pool. He had to make sure you were okay. And he had to see whether or not Sky had his hands all over you.
—–
Swimming with Sky was a lot more fun than you thought it would be. Halfway down the path to the pool, Sky pulled out a blindfold and blindfolded you. Saying that he had a surprise to show you. When you got to the pool he took your blindfold off and took your breath away. 
There were rose petals and candles everywhere. It was sweet, romantic, and beautiful.
"Did you do all this?" you ask.
"I did. With a little help from your friends."
"Eve and Lino helped you?"
"Not in the way you may be thinking. I asked them what you like and they told me that you're sort of a hopeless romantic. So I went out and bought a few dozen roses and some candles. I hope you like it."
"I love it. Thank you."
"Look, I know why we're doing this. I know it's to make your man jealous but I was serious when I said any man would kill for a woman like you."
You couldn't help the blush on your cheeks. 
"Thank you. You're not so bad yourself cowboy."
"I know we have parts to play but who said we couldn't have a little fun?"
You smile at him before kissing him softly. 
"True. So wanna go for a swim? The water is warm."
"Let's go."
You two stripped down to your swimwear and jumped into the pool. It was refreshing to not have to think about Blake and his walking poor life choice. It was even more refreshing to have someone treat you the way you deserve. You two spent several minutes splashing, racing, and generally horsing around in the pool. After about an hour you were starting to get cold, so you two took a break and stretched out on a chaise lounge, and looked up at the stars. 
"This was everything. Thank you so much."
He kissed the knuckle of your right hand. 
"You're welcome. I just wanted to do something special for you."
"I appreciate it. It's nice to be wanted by someone."
"As you should be."
Sky trailed light kisses from the palm of your right hand to your wrist, up your forearm to your shoulder, and then your neck. 
"You're gonna have to stop."
"¿Por qué mami?" he whispered against your neck.
"Because I'm starting to get used to it. We're supposed to be playing our parts."
"Entonces juguemos."
"You're so giving me a Spanish lesson."
"Gladly mamí."
Sky tangled his left hand in your hair and pulled your head back and slid his tongue in your mouth. This is what you should be doing with Blake but in the meantime, there's Sky. He slid his right hand into your swimsuit cupping your breast and rubbing your nipple in circles. The sensation was enough to drive you up a wall. 
Sky kissed and sucked on your neck as he undid the top of your swimsuit. With your breasts free, Sky was able to massage and play with them much to Blake's chagrin. 
"Te quiero mami. Dame lo que necesito." 
Yup. You were definitely gonna make Blake take Spanish lessons. Because hearing it whispered in your ear is doing it for you.
You wanted him to devour you. To just gobble you up. You were getting impatient so you hurriedly took off your swimsuit and he tossed his swim trunks before having you straddle him. This gave Blake a very clear view of your very bare ass. 
"Habla mami. Tell me what you want."
"I want you to taste me."
He nibbled on your chin before going to your neck as his hands roamed your body. He slid his hands to your thighs. Massaging them open then sliding his hands in between. It didn't take him long to find your aching clit. You loved the way he played with you.
"You're so soft for me mamí."
"Must've been all that swimming."
You let out a sound that was half gasp half moan as you felt his fingers slip inside you.
"Grind on my hand mamí. Let me feel you."
Feeling his fingers move inside you, gave you all the motivation that you needed to move. This feeling was deliriously intoxicating. You wrapped your arms around his neck as you rode his fingers.
"Así es mami solo así."
Your moans started to get louder as your orgasm began to build. You could feel your muscles contract and release around his fingers. Bouncing and grinding against him building friction.
"Yes! Yes! Yes! You feel so good!"
"Take it! Tell me that you want it!"
"I want it Papí! I need it!"
Sky pumped his fingers inside of you a few more times then shoved them so deep that it sent your orgasm over the edge and you screamed. Flooding his hand. He slowly removed his hand from between your legs. He smiled wickedly at you. 
"Suck. Now!" 
He wanted to watch you taste yourself. You look him directly in the eye while you slowly lick and suck your own juices off of his fingers. 
"Fuck you are so beautiful when you do that."
He had a glint in his eyes. Half trouble half fun.
"I want you to sit on my face."
A slow smirk bloomed on your face. 
"You serious?"
"Heart attack."
You smiled wickedly at each other as he watched you stand up, he laid down, and you sat directly on his face. Your jaw fell open as you made contact with his tongue. You dug your nails into his chest and arched your back as he ferociously ate you out. 
"Oh shit! Fuck! You feel so good!" you moaned completely oblivious to your surroundings. You had no idea you were being watched. 
This was the second time Blake watched you and Sky together. And Blake was so ashamed of how hot the sex between you two was; even more of how aroused he was to watch you in the throws of passion.
With shuddered breath, he took his excitement out of his jeans and started feverishly rubbing.
You rode Sky's face like a jockey on a horse. Moving your hips and grinding into him as you buried his face in your pussy and lost yourself in the pleasure. He was doing exactly what you needed him to do. Your eyes rolled back, you shuddered, and your body shook as your second orgasm tore through you.
You got off him and noticed the satisfied smirk on his face. 
"God you taste so good."
"Thank you, Papí."
You noticed that Sky was hard as a rock. That's what you wanted. 
"Well someone is happy to see me."
Sky sat up slightly holding his dick.
"Siempre mami. Come get a taste."
He guided you to lay down on the lounge chair. So that your head was hanging of the edge. He ran his swollen head across your lips before slipping it inside your mouth. With his hands around the back of your head, he began to fuck your face. He looks ves the feeling of your mouth. It's wet, warm, and inviting. He watched your head bob up and down on his shaft in a haze. He was in heaven. Hearing the disgusting yet sexy sounds that cane from your mouth made him giddy. 
"¡Si asi es mi amor! Suck this dick!" 
Feeling his hips move was a high for you. His moans were music to your ears. 
"You feel so good mamí! Give me your mouth! Give me your throat!"
In this moment being slutted out was what you needed, wanted, and craved. Nearly choking, eye-watering, and saliva dribbling down made you feel more alive than ever.
When he shoved his dick deep into your mouth one last time, he unloaded his warm seed down your throat. When he pulled out of your mouth thoroughly satisfied. 
"¡Ay mami! ¡Eres tan buena!" he said while catching his breath.
You licked your lips just as satisfied as he was.
"Now what am I gonna do with you?" you purred.
"Whatever you want. I am yours."
You had him lay down on the lounge chair because you just had to get it out of her system. You had to ride him like a rodeo. You couldn't help it. You needed desperately to feel him inside you again. She slid down onto his dick after briefly sucking him off again and went to town. You bounced up and down on his dick riding him hard. Using him however you wanted just to get off. He enjoyed it as well. 
Feeling you pussy grip his dick drove him insane. He took advantage of the situation by grabbing your hips and thrusting his making him fuck you harder. He watched as you began to unravel. In that moment, all you cared about was your own selfish pleasure. You wrapped your arm around his neck and dug your nails into his back. 
This is what you wanted. This is what Blake should be giving you every night.
With a firm grip on your ass, Sky guided you up and down his shaft pushing you further and further to that climatic edge. When he brought you down onto his lap one final, your vision went white as you broke under the intense pressure of your orgasm. Sky moaned as he finished just as Blake climaxed all over his hand.
Whew! You both were spent! Clinging to each other in a haze of raw pleasure. Grinning at each other like fools.
Meanwhile, Blake was both ashamed and astonished at the fact he got off watching you fuck another man.
'Fuck, I need her,' he thought, retreating back into the shadows.
This situation couldn't happen again. Sky needed to go. Because girlfriend or not you belong only to Blake.
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The dragon prince season 4 rant(spoilers from like line one)
There's a lot of ppl complaining rn about aaravos only getting one scene but I think this was very well done for two reasons. One is fandoms love puzzles. Finding all the pieces, seeing what goes together and figuring out what the final picture is. But once they're done with the puzzle they move right onto the next thing to solve. They'll either not appreciate the work the crew puts in after solving the puzzle(I've done this in the past with shows like gravity falls- trust me I know) or just treat it as another show and move on to the next hyped up thing. There's also fans who's reviews/ reactions I've seen on yt and LITERALLY IN SEASON 2 they said "this guy's cool but once you know the mystery and big reveal he's kinda boring" IN SEASON 2!!!! SO YEAH NO WONDER TDP CREW ARE ONLY GIVING HIM SO FEW LINES.
Secondly the show is titled "mystery of aaravos" not "discovering aaravos" or "all about aaravos". "Mystery of aaravos". What kind of mystery reveals itself at the start of a new chapter in the show? And yeah yeah it's season 4 but season 3 wasn't "mystery of arravos" it was the dragon prince. We didn't get most of tdp clues until the end of season 3 / during the hiatus excluding maybe things like the elarion poem? Idk when that came in could've been season 1/2 as that was when we first saw the ancient book I believe right? Correct me if I'm wrong I need to rewatch the show. Also side note the show is definitely not a long show. I work full time 10-6 night shifts Mon to Fri and I still binged it all in 8 hours the Sunday after guy Fawkes night. So yeah even if aaravos only gets one scene so what? It's not like we're sitting through 40/50 min eps to get a crumb of hot elf man.
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Oh right yeah tdp is made by a lot of atla crew so they know what they're doing when they only keep the big bad in one major scene (which he slayed in btw) it's not just fanservice
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As fun as the fanservice is Aaravos' tiny scene is a great display of his power(which we've seen little regarding the extent it can go btw esp with a non consenting host) and raises many questions for us to theorise on(like is Aaravos' a monster fucker?/j... Unless). The crew knows how to stir the fandom and indeed were probably predicting this dissapointed response when they made Aaravos' scene. Yet they kept it this way bc that's how you reel in the old fans and even viewers. With puzzles and mysteries and hidden clues. It's also a good way to keep casual viewers who may miss the hidden clues on their toes. Even if most of the hints and clues fly over their heads they'll still think "why is this guy fallen?" "What does he gain from manipulating people this way?"(which is a whole debate of its own after elarion's poem).
So tldr: the breadcrumbs we get of aaravos are intentional and a lot of people don't get that
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oveliagirlhaditright · 6 months
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Cosmo Canyon in Final Fantasy VII Rebirth was done so well. It got me as good as it did in the original, with the story of Seto and Nanaki's reaction to it -sobs-.
...
I'm also a loser, who has been watching some scenes for Cissnei that I haven't gotten to yet (because YT has been recommending them to me), that are in some side quests and they're killing me. First off, they've just made me love her even more. Secondly... though I'll always be a Zerith, I did ship her and Zack slightly, and some of these scenes are reminding me of why I do. The fact that Cissnei is still waiting for Zack, in a way, just breaks my heart and gives me so many feelings. She loved him so much... But you can also see it as friendship, too (because they were friends, of course. And she accepted that Zack didn't return her feelings and his relationship with Aerith. In fact, here in FFVIIR she sees why he loved Aerith), and that's just as beautiful, of course.
...
Today, I got through all of Nibelheim--and it was great (the quest where Tifa finds her cat? -sobs- and Vincent!!!)--but some of the parts with Cait Sith made me want to rip my hair out: namely when you had to throw boxes at things far away from you. I feel like my target reticle was acting up, so my game never wanted to hit the things it was supposed to... and thus I had to attempt this numerous times and/or was sitting there forever, just trying to get said target to line up with the target, with it really refusing to line up. I almost was starting to think I'd get stuck here, in fact, and have to watch the rest of the game on YouTube, but it all finally worked out. But my game seemingly acting up wasn't fun (two areas in particular).
But I shan't look back! Cid and Vincent are finally with the party, I'm about to have my date with Tifa at the Saucer, and then it's on to the Temple of the Ancients!
Three more chapters to go (counting the one I'm currently in)!:)
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bylightofdawn · 1 year
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I cannot tell if my laptop is just dying or if I have a virus or WHAT but it's been so fucking laggy for the past month or two. I've run multiple virus/malware scans. My memory is like maxed out almost all the time with just Firefox, my focus writing program and email open which is....wild. My CPU usage is also pretty high so I think I've got a virus somewhere I just cannot find. I just order an extra stick of RAM off of amazon. I'm going to install that and see if that fixes this and if not I think I might just wipe windows completely. There's really not a lot of files installed on this because I never got around to moving my stuff off the external HD I have.
But I've run every malware program I can think of and am near to the point of breaking down and doing a hijack this begging for help post. We'll see if the RAM upgrade works. I really wanted to go 16GB but my laptop has 8 GB apparently soldered to the motherboard which cannot be removed. SUPPOSEDLY this can support up to 32GB but everything I've always been taught about ram is to match the ram size so if this non-removable ram is 8 then I should get another stick of 8gb. I can always upgrade to 16gb later, it's not that much more expensive.
It's just gotten so annoying it's actually interrupting my ability to write because firefox will just randomly freeze. Chrome was 10x worse and I just straight up stopped using it.
I've also never even opened the case on this laptop up till this point and I'm also nervous but fucks sake if I can't handle a ram upgrade then I should just turn my geek card in. That is legitimately the easiest upgrade you can do and I've already looked at a couple of YT videos and it looks stupidly easy. Also asurion still has not sent me this replacement box for the powercord. Thankfully the second replacement cord I got has been working and not giving me any of the problems the first one has. So it definitely must have been a dug charger.
I'm now just lowkey salty my warranty is apparently fucking useless with asurion. I just cannot work up the energy to call and bitch about it. Which is prolly what they are counting on. I also picked up a replacement cooling fan, mine is fine but it has been sounding like it's struggling a little bit so I might just swap that out since it looks to be a pretty easy swap as well. Assuming I can find my heatsink paste from the last time I swapped out the fan on my old laptop. LOL
ANYWAY. I've gotten to a whopping 3100 words on this fic, Cody is going AWOL now, I think I'm just going to call it end of scene or maybe end of chapter and pick up tomorrow with him being in dire straights and being discovered by Slick.
I'm highkey looking forward to it. But it's midnight so I should prolly call it quits for now.
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nazuri · 2 years
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So i am currently losing my mind over a book
No it's not a good book or anything it's just this one sentence that destroyed my faith in the author but that after a bit of context
So there is this polish author Katarzyna Michalak (i will call her Kasia) who is an absolute scribbler meaning that this woman can put out like five books a year
So Kasia is an absolute disaster of an author with not so big but not small audience and we can assume most of them are bored middle age women
There are two of her series that I'm familiar with and just to tell you they are an absolute gem in terms of destroying expectations
That is the Sunny trilogy and Year in Raspberry series (keep in mind I did my best to translate that but it may as well be wrong)
For the Raspberry one i know about the first book of the series from a video on YT and it's just so funny when you think of it
So Ewa the main character is just this woman who has like three months to get a book out because of a deal she made with her friend (and that is whole other thing we don't talk about because I think he later becomes love interest or sth idk) and that is basically the plot I might be wrong but well...
And the funniest part of the whole book is a character of a famous author in the book's universe who occasionally shows up from nowhere and helps the MC and drops some prophecies and I am not joking on this one and if you tried to guess that author happens to be no one else but our Kasia
Yes that woman basically did a self-insert into her own book as this omnipotent all-knowing person that sometimes helps the MC and it's hilarious and that is while ignoring how hilariously badly the book is written
So for the Sunny series actually it was my friend who read it but she was basically sending us every other page because it was so funny
In the Sunny series we explore the story of Patrycja (Pati) who has a dream and wants to make it happen and stuff (the MC "dream" in pretty much every book of this author is a little white house somewhere in the forest or a field or some place like that and a guy and that's about it) (this particular MC is also fun fact a witch particularly a dreamer who's dreams come true and stuff and it's all just Kasia's view in this so its pretty much all wrong but still)
So we see her story and stuff and at one point our dear Pati decides to write a book...
I don't think you can guess what the book was about
So the book that you are reading is called Poczekajka (no idea how to translate that) and our main character decides to write Poczekajka as her story just change the names
So the character in the book is basically writing the book you are reading...
Interesting right?
Well it gets better
You see if you do some looking you will find an actual music video from Kasia made specifically for Poczekajka that she herself is starring in
So what does our MC do?
She makes a music video and uses the exact same song that is in the irl video because Kasia put the words in the book
So you see just how weird it all is right?
Like this woman does so much self-insert in her book I don't know what is real anymore
But that was just the context for my pressing issue that doesn't let me sleep at night
You see i am currently reading one of her book on my own because we made it a thing in our friend group and I chose one titled Leśna Polana which translates into Forest Clearing or some shit idk
So in this we actually have three main female characters and three brothers that I assume will become love interest and so around chapter 6 one of the younger twin brothers (Patryk) comes across a women jumping out if a window to escape her abusive partner so he calls up his twin (Marcin who btw was at the moment meeting the other female character) to help him get her to the house of the third female character (who was once engaged to their older brother but they don't know it was her yet I told you her books are wierd) and through the whole chapter the jump out the window girl never once mentions her name to the men helping her (name's Julia btw)
And after they get her to her friend's house Marcin talks about the girl he met at the club and that he didn't ask her for a name and Patryk says somethin and Marcin is like "and you asked your Julia?"
And that one sentence destroyed my week
Because what fucking prophet is he that he fucking got that name especially since literally two chapter later they say that they don't know her name and I'm like bitch what
So you may think what if it's Romeo and Juliet reference
Well my friends came to similar conclusion but I don't have any faith in this author so I took matters in my own hands
I went and wrote sugar coated message in Instagram which she doesn't apparently read and if I say sugar-coated I mean it because I didn't believe in any of the words I wrote but I know if you criticize her even a little bit you can get banned or some shit and it just needed to be done for me to get noticed
So I know she won't read the Instagram message so I went through her website and there was that guest book corner where people wrote to her and she usually responded in like a day or so
And so I took my chances and asked about that one line that wrecked my mind
And what does she say
Yes Marcin meant the Julia he just met that hasn't introduced herself that he met for the first time in his life and I just
I am not even disappointed or anything because frankly I couldn't expect anything else but I wanted to believe that she knows what she writes but no
She just randomly plays Apollo shooting people with the gift of prophecy and it's just so bizarre it actually makes it a fun experience and I can't get over that fact
So yeah sometimes even a bad author can bring you fun no matter how awful they are at what they're doing
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rayslittlekitten · 3 years
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Bad
Crazy | Bad | Again | Boo'd Up
A/N: This is a fic inspired by the song “Bad” by Wale (YT link at bottom of post). Had this idea for a while but had never actually worked on it and I’m kind of having trouble with my other Jax fic so I did this instead.
Rating: E (18+ ONLY)
Pairing: Jax Teller x F!reader
Plot: You are part of a different Sons charter and you and Jax hook up when he comes to town.
Contains: smutty sex and sexy GIFS (one sourced from here.), light choking, teeny verbal degradation, playful face slapping,
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SAMCRO is in town again. They don't come here often, maybe once a year at most. Twice if something serious is going down. They've got some business with the Sons of Anarchy chapter you sling drinks for, which means you have to play hostess.
As you're putting clean beer glasses away, you see the members getting welcomed into the clubhouse. You recognize a few faces, mainly the officers of the group, especially the Vice-President. As they make their way to the bar, the blonde immediately makes eye contact with you. Those mesmerizing blue eyes you get lost in every time you see them are looking you up and down. Before he can make his way to you, him and his men are called into the room you and all the women are never allowed into to handle whatever they came here for. ***
After all the business is discussed, it's party time. You and the other barmaids prepped for tonight, knowing what to expect. Some of the girls hate it having to cater to the guests. Others love it as they warm up to them and try to make themselves old ladies. You? You're the chapter president's daughter so most are too intimidated to approach you, except for one person. As Blondie walks towards you, one of the other barmaids intercepts and tries to flaunt herself as she offers him a beer. He nods politely and takes it from her. He entertains her for a few minutes as she talks his ears off.
You smirk and chuckle at him as his eyes lock with yours. His body language is telling you he does not want to be in this situation.
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"Hey, sweetheart, let's a get a round of shots here," someone shouts to you over the loud music.
"Shots, coming right up!" You reply and start grabbing all the clean shot glasses you can find and empty out a fresh bottle of whiskey into them.
As the night goes on, you and Blondie keep stealing glances at each other, with each opportunity for him to approach you getting interrupted in one way or another. As the party winds down, many of the people are either passed out or left with a woman or two in their arms.
You start cleaning up, grabbing the empty beer bottles and glasses on top of the bar and tossing them into a large plastic bin.
"Need help with that?" 
You look up and see Blondie as he tosses a few bottles into your bin.
"Please, you don't need to help me with these. You're a guest."
Blondie folds his arms and leans into the bar top to get closer to you.
"Well if it means we can get out of here sooner, I'd be glad to help you out," he says to you lowly.
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***
You're pinned to the wall and Blondie is holding you up while your arms are around his neck and your legs wrapped around his waist. Your bottoms are completely off and his jeans and boxers are pulled down around his thighs. He's pounding into you hard and fast.
"Slow down, Jax," you pant. "We have all night."
Jax smashes his lips onto yours and you slip your tongue into his mouth. He then pulls you off the wall and walks over to your bed and drops you on it.
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He kicks his sneakers off and the rest of his clothes. He spreads your legs wider with his knees and shoves himself inside you again and drives himself into you.
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"I don't get to see you much so I'm making up for lost time," Jax growls into your ear.
Since you first both met, you and Jax have an unspoken arrangement. Anytime he's in town, you both hook up, no strings attached. Growing up with guys like Jax, the last thing you want is to be someone's old lady, but you know they can be a good fuck. Jax is living proof of it.
"Maybe you should come more often," you nibble on his earlobe.
"That's what I'm trying to make you do," Jax says before sinking his teeth into your neck.
You moan and thrust your hips up to meet his. He grabs your legs and throws them over his shoulders, shifting his position so he's stroking your g-spot.
"Oh, fuck..." you groan. It's literally been a year since you've had sex with Jax but he still knows his way around your body. Jax wraps a hand around your neck as he quickens and deepens his strokes, his hips snapping into you. You scream out as you feel yourself cumming on Jax's dick. Jax doesn't stop until your orgasm subsides, but he knows you have more inside you. He always makes it a personal goal to pull as many orgasms as he can out of you in the short time he has with you.
He flips on to his back and you straddle him, sinking yourself back onto him.
"Take your shirt off," Jax says as he grabs your hips and starts thrusting up.
You reach for the bottom of your tank top and pull it over your head, tossing it aside.  You then reach behind you and unclasp your bra. Your breasts hangs freely after removing the garment holding them up. Jax reaches up to grab and feel them in his calloused hands. You place your hands on his chest and start riding him, moving back and forth.
"Come on, darlin'..." Jax coos.
You find your spot and grind down against him as you feel your clit rubbing against his pubic bone. He helps you along by pinching your nipples. He knows when you're on top and you get into your rhythm, you're in complete control and you use his generous-sized dick like your live sex toy. He never moves as not to throw you off, but he knows the right words that will just push you over the edge as you're concentrating on your second orgasm.
"Cum for me, darlin'." Jax says. "Be a good slut and cum for me."
And just like that, you quicken your pace and unravel on top of him, your juices dripping down to his balls. 
"There you go." Jax smiles. 
You start bouncing on him, this time helping him to chase his own release. Jax grips your ass and helps you move up and down on him. You lean down a bit and move your hands onto the bed on each sides of his head and move your hair to one side and continue to slide over him.  You love the way he just fills you up. It's like his cock was shaped perfectly for your vagina. You can sit on him and not move at all and still feel pleasure from it. You're beginning to lose yourself into this feeling as you close your eyes and soak it in.
"You got another one in you?" Jax asks curiously.
"No, but your fucking dick just feels so good inside me," you answer as you continue to slowly grind against him. He smirks as he watches you enjoy using him as your human dildo. Like you said, you have all night. SAMCRO usually stays for the night and leaves the next morning so he's also enjoying this little show. This time though, he feels his dick is aligned perfectly in your pussy, like there's a "click" that happens when it's in the right place and he grabs your hips and starts thrusting up.
"Jax!"
"Give me another one, darlin'," he growls. "I know it's in there." He drives harder and faster into you, poking at your g-spot again, but you want him to really fuck the shit out of you instead and you know just what will make him do that. You suddenly slap him hard across his face. His face hardens and you smirk. Without warning, he flips you over onto your back and pins your wrists above your head and then shoves himself deep inside you. You gasp.
"You wanna play rough tonight, huh?" Jax smirks.
"Fuck me like it's your last time, Jax," you tell him.
"I never want to think it might be our last time."
"Don't go soft on me, Jax. Fuck me like I'm your good little whore."
"You are my good little whore," Jax smiles and fucks you so deep, so hard and so fast like his life depended on it. You feel your third orgasm building. You also know Jax is ready to blow his load soon too. The noises and faces he's making are his usual cues and you recognize them.
"I'm almost there, Jax. Don't stop."
Jax looks down at you as your body tenses up.
"Cum for me, Jax. I'm gonna cum too."
And just like that, you both come undone. You both get lost in each other's eyes and moan as you feel his dick pulsing and he feels your pussy milking him. He falls on top of you as  you both take deep breaths to fill your lungs with oxygen and try to bring your heart rates back down, but you know in 15 minutes you both will be back at it.
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whxreforsvkvna · 3 years
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mirage errone pt. 3 || bakugou x reader
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genre: Princess!reader x bandit!Bakugo, ft. Bakusquad
warnings: all bnha characters are above 18+ (unless otherwise mentioned), multi-chapter, minor (and some major) swear words here and there throughout fic thanks to Bakugo, Bakugo isn’t as rough as he is in canon
word count: 1.3k
prompts: in which a self-proclaimed good-hearted bandit group kidnaps the wrong princess
prev || next
You lost track of how much time was spent travelling. You assumed their hideout was located somewhere deep in the forest as the rustle of trees and the snapping of fallen branches were your only indication of constant sound.
The men rarely spoke with each other - presumably because of your presence. You feared hearing even just a sliver of information about your captors could result in your untimely death. It wasn’t as if you weren’t afraid at the moment, because you most certainly were.
You were ripped away from the safety of your home and are now in the hands of ruly men whose main goal was unknown. Is this a hostage encounter? Bibimi and yourself were briefed as children on what to do in situations like these.
The basic rules were to be followed: Remain calm, always comply with the enemy, never provoke your captor, and do not unveil secrets of the Royal Family.
You could proudly say the last one would stay unbroken, but as for the others… Well, we can leave it at that.
“Just up ahead now.” One announced, bringing your senses into high alert. You felt your heart rate pick up and the familiar feeling of your anxiety began to seep its way back into your chest.
Your horse came to an abrupt stop after its owner’s command, causing your body to shift forward. To your horror, this small action was enough to start a chain reaction where your body began to slide off the saddle and in your blinded and immobile state, there was nothing you could physically do to stop it.
Your legs began to dangle loosely off the animal’s side and your entire figure tensed up in the moment, your body unsure of how else to react to the situation. You felt yourself slip further off the horse and with gravity’s help, your body fell.
Your mouth flew open for a shriek yet it stayed lodged in your throat as you felt yourself fall against something that was definitely not the ground. Arms wrapped themselves around your midsection, causing your muscles to run taut and still. No one had dared to ever touch you in such a forward way.
You lurched forward, escaping the person’s arms only to bump into the horse - it snorted in response to your bruteness.
“Easy there.” You weren’t sure if the new voice - a male’s, you noted - was talking to the animal or to you. “Hold still for a second, will you?”
Hands were placed roughly on your shoulders, guiding you to turn around in your spot. The same pair helped untie your blindfold, allowing you to finally take in your surroundings. Upon the harsh glare of the sun, you turned your face towards the ground, eyes involuntarily closing shut.
After this quick action, you bring yourself to look up and your gaze is captured by captivating brown eyes. They’re squinted, with eyebrows furrowed to top the look of scrutiny off. Their owner’s appearance is rough-looking; with his mouth pressed in a thin line, jagged spikes of blond locks, and red eyes scanning your own. You curse yourself for having the simple thought of him being attractive.
“I assume the trip wasn’t to your liking?” he questioned, the corners of his lips curling further downwards. His voice is unsurprisingly deep - the last trait to complete his rugged look. “We figured you were used to horseback riding, in one way or another.”
He motioned to his companions, who were finally unmasked and you sent hard glares to the duo. The blond grinned at you while he unloaded their traveling packs on the horses.
The other simply shrugged, “It wasn’t as difficult as you made it out to be, by the way. After figuring out which room was hers, it was smooth sailing from there.”
“I apologize for the easy finding.” You retorted. “We will try to the best of our efforts to make it harder for you next time.”
“There won’t be a need for the next time.” He simply laughed before heading off further into the forest. Your body flushed with heat as you quickly grew angry at his words.
“Don’t pay mind to him. He likes to tease.” You looked back to the man in front of you.
“And who should I pay attention to, then?”
“Well, that all depends on you, Your Highness.” he teased and you cringed at the title. He grasped your hands, and it’s only then that you noticed the dagger in his hand. You flinched away, trying to escape his grip. He grunted, pulling your hands back, “Hey, don’t move. I’m just trying to cut the restraints. I don’t need to nip you and have you bleed.”
He skillfully tore the bounds in one smooth motion and your wrists cried out in relief. Out of reflex, you rubbed the irritated skin, hoping to ease the sudden numbing sensation.
The man seemed to take notice of this. “Jiro is good at aiding us with cuts and the sorts. She should have something for the discomfort.”
Why would someone who was in the same group as your captors want to help you? You found it hard to believe his intentions came from sole kindness. You were most likely here for ransom, so there was the possibility they would want you with little to no harm done.
“You’ve got the horses, Denki?” he spoke out to the man that was tending to the animals.
“Yeah, I’ll bring them back to the nearby town first thing tomorrow.” his comrade replied.
“We’ll be heading back now, then. Don’t waste any time.” With that, he signaled for you to follow him before heading off in the same direction his other companion did moments earlier.
For a brief moment, you debated on running. But one glance at the way the blond was monitoring your movements and the one ahead of you didn’t turn back to see if you were following him, you knew they were confident in stopping your escape.
So, you found yourself fighting against dangling branches and unearthed roots - an environment you were completely new to. You had never stepped foot off the palace grounds until now.
A bastard royal was not allowed to make public appearances unless it were balls held within their own castles. Even then, you only had a mere hour or so before the Queen was ushering you back into your bedroom chambers, cheeks flushed pink from lingering stares that followed your escaping figures.
It was after the umpteenth time you tripped on an uprooted tree branch, that the man in front of you spoke up.
“Here,” you looked up to see him offering a hand, “You’re slowing us down with all the clumsy steps you’re taking”
“I’m fine.” You brushed his aid away, refusing to accept anything from this criminal.
“Whatever Your Highness wants.” He rolled his eyes, continuing onwards. It’s quiet between you two, before he spoke up once more to your growing annoyance. “Can’t say I’m sorry for doing this, but I’m sure you understand our reasons behind it.”
“I can’t say that I do, unless you are looking to be paid handsomely for my return.” You spoke under the impression they all still assumed you to be your older sister. Otherwise, they’d get nothing more than a bronze coin for your return.
“What we want has nothing to do with money, although there is a large reward waiting for us.” His reply is quick and simple, confusing you.
“If it isn’t money you are aiming for, then what is the need for my capture?”
“Oh, well, that’s easy.” He halted, turning around to fully face you. “I want to stop a corrupt princess and her father from ruling this Kingdom.”
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Tag List
@animexholic ; @the2ndl ; @rynsuki ; @portalprincess ; @vanillaicedlatte-yt ; @kiwanna ; @random-fandom-girl-24 ; @cloudsgathering
if you'd like to be added to the tag list, please feel free to ask!
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earisridesagain · 2 years
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Earis Recs - 1.1 Defy The Stars
Theme: Defy The Stars - Star Wars Reylo fics with the word 'Stars' in the title.
On Dreamwidth - EarisParticipates - 1.1 Defy The Stars
On Twitter - Earis Recs - 1.1 Defy The Stars
I wanted to start with something kind of basic, which will allow me to a) put up a few quick recs and b) rec some fic that I adore, and that I think are great ways to introduce people to some of the big tropes in Reylo fic.
A Path to Broken Stars by stellardarlings (on tumblr here)
Who does mythology better than Reylos?  No one.  This is one of my favorite fics in the entire Reylo ship because of its skillful use of the myth of Eros and Psyche as a lens for the Reylo relationship.  Kylo Ren, a magic user, betrays his mother’s kingdom of Alderaan to Snoke’s armies.  In the desert of Jakku, Rey struggles to survive until a chance encounter with Kylo and his Knights of Ren reveal that, unbeknownst to her, she is a magic user as well.  Kylo takes her as an apprentice and begins to train her.  The fic deals with themes of masks and hidden identities, female desire, and the greatest moral of all time - AMOR OMNIA VINCIT. 
Status: Complete
Rating: M
Warnings: Rides the line of dub-con in places
2. Under Different Stars by Aaveena (on tumblr here)
Perhaps the largest and most fruitful type of Reylo fanfiction is where an author picks a moment in their story  and has a character make a different choice.  Under Different Stars has Ben choose to become something different - after Luke almost tries to kill Ben that night in the temple, Ben cuts himself off from the Force and flees.  Rey remains on Jakku, continuing to scavenge, until a bounty hunter named Kylo Ren comes to the planet to pick up an old YT 1300 light freighter from the junkyard.
Status: WIP, 24/35 chapters posted
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: not much, there is some discussion or reference to sexual assault
3. A Collision of Stars by dustoftheancients (no twitter or tumblr that I can find)
Posted and completed before The Last Jedi aired, A Collision of Stars was one of the first long fics I ever read in this pairing.  It has many of the hallmarks of classic, early Reylo - a darker characterization for Kylo,  the incorporation of a lot of established Star Wars lore, and a brilliant prediction of the Force bond but in a way that’s really kind of different.  This fic is painful in the best way, creative, gorgeous, and shot through with intense emotion and incisive characterization.  The author took what we learned in the Force Awakens and careened off into the galaxy, developing their own narrative that is completely plausible and incredibly engrossing.  
Status: Completed
Rating
Warnings: violence, cannibalism, plenty of dark side stuff
4. Stars Across Your Skin by andabatae
A modern AU with two of my favorite tropes - 1) at least one of the pairing is an artist, and 2) the two interact over the Internet without realizing who each other are.  Rey is an art director and Ben is a photographer working on the same project, a fashion shoot.  And they HATE each other - or so it seems.  This is a particularly beautiful story because it also deals with intense loneliness.  Both Rey and Ben are touchstarved, and it laces their interactions with anguish and, later, ecstasy. 
Status: Complete
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Discussion of emotional trauma and neglect
5. Broken, Accidental Stars by HarpiaHarpyja
Here we have a fic dealing with one of the tipping points of the sequel trilogy, a choice presented to a character that ends up driving much of the plot - Kylo Ren and Han Solo on the bridge in Starkiller Base.  Here, Kylo Ren turns back to the light and returns with his father as Ben Solo.  He is not entirely healed, not entirely forgiven, and not entirely comfortable.  And Rey? Rey is conflicted and difficult.  Honestly, this is one of my favorite characterizations of Rey out there - she is stubborn, smart, angry, compassionate, and curious and they both help her and hurt her.
Status: 34 /40 chapters posted
Rating:Explicit
Warnings: nothing I can remember
6. Holo Porn Stars: The Career Change by CaptainMarvel 42 (on tumblr here)
Oh crack!fic, the engine that keeps many, if not all, of us going.  This is a canon fic where footage of the Interrogation leaks on the holonet and many in the galaxy read the encounter as . . . charged.  So naturally, they start making porn about it.  Rey and Kylo are appalled at the low quality of much of the porn and decide to see if they can do better.
Status: Complete
Rating: Mature
Warnings: crack, porn? Dub-con as part of porn?
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an-annyeoing-writer · 3 years
Text
vulnerability. – chap. 3.
Story info:
Pair: Byun Baekhyun x Reader
Rating: +18 for mentions of s*x and violence (future chapters)
Genre: angst, smut
Chapter info:
Release date: 29th July 2021
Word count: 4 219
Warnings: none
Vulnerability Masterlist || Fanfiction Masterlist || Ko-Fi
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Taglist:
@shesdreaminginoverdose @mybiasdashboard @marimsun @byuns-asscheeks @multi–kpop–fanfics @vunv @making-me-blush @skittlez-area512 @bloopbloopkai @byuns-asscheeks @baekyeonoreo @devotedexolnhottest @mingxia-nikki04 @velvetjongin @ssssssul (won't let me tag you T_T) @nemi-mei @buttercupbbh
Please, always comment on the newest chapter if you wish to be added to/removed from the taglist. I will be also checking the tags, so if you’re shy – feel free to leave a note this way.
Previous (Chap. 2.)
Chap. 3.
The tension that appeared the moment you received the phone call from Baekhyun did not dissolve with time. In fact, the opposite happened – it grew as the time passed, and as Saturday came closer and closer. Finally, once your Friday to Saturday night shift came to an end and you stumbled into your flat around 4 in the morning, you knew that you wouldn’t be able to fall asleep easily. Yet, you forced a whole cup of green tea into yourself in an attempt to soothe your nerves before sleep. Your alarm was set for noon, and you were supposed to meet at 3 PM.
You woke up feeling energized, but you knew this pattern all too well already – the tiredness would come and hit you with its whole power the day after, and you’d spend Sunday sluggish and drained. But that was okay, because Sunday didn’t matter half as much as Saturday did.
You felt a small urge to dress up; even more, actually, you felt a need to pay attention to details rather than looking fine at the first glance. Some common sense hyped up by years of watching other people and reading stories – a thorough shower, shaving, paying attention to not only what you wore outside, but also your undergarments. You lacked things that could be considered “sexy”, but – let’s face it – you didn’t think it mattered much; not after what you’d found out so far. Yet, it would be a shame if your panties had a hole in them. Wearing something neutral, but fresh was your best bet. Every few minutes, you kept reminding yourself – you don’t even know what will happen, you don’t even know if anything will happen at all. There was no reason to think that he’ll want you to undress in the first place, you said it yourself that you’re not ready for sex.
But then, it still helped you gather confidence that you definitely needed at a moment like that. Details allowed one less thing to worry about, and a better ability to focus on others, and so, you made sure the details were worked out well, and that you didn’t overdress, either; a beige shirt and jeans, all wrapped up with sneakers and another knitted cardigan of yours – neutral and polite, maybe a bit school-ish, but these were the things you mostly wore on daily basis, and you felt that going in the other direction – of tight pants, mini-skirts and see-through shirts – would not be appreciated. Your hair was pulled up into a loose bun, nothing like the ones you admired in YT tutorials, but the best you could do on your own. Maybe it was the age difference that made you feel obliged to show respect rather than expose yourself. You trusted your instinct on that, and so far, nothing happened yet to prove it wrong. The weather was starting to get warmer; these days were particularly sunny and dry, so you felt at ease without an extra jacket. It couldn’t get that bad in the evening, and you put faith in your cardigan.
Baekhyun must have thought similarly.
You stood in the bar’s entry, looking up at him for a moment; he leaned back into his usual couch, not aware of your presence just yet. He was wearing a black button-up and jeans as well, something he still looked pretty well put-together in, but not too formal – similar to your own thought process, noticeably.
You inhaled deeply, and took your time to exhale the air – until you felt ready to walk up to him.
“Hi there” he spoke as you approached his couch; as expected, he was there alone today.
“Hi there” you replied with a slight nod and a smile; your voice was quiet, as quiet as it could be without trembling in anticipation.
“You want to drink something before we go?”
You considered it for a second, and then nodded again. Baekhyun moved a bit to the side, encouraging you to join him on the couch, and you took the offer with gratitude.
“Beer? I don’t want to get you drunk, but we may sit here for a bit just to relax.”
“You can tell I need it?”
“Yes. I can tell. Your shoulders are very tense. May I?”
His hand reached to your shoulder and you nodded slightly, a bit unsure what you agreed to just yet.
He suddenly squeezed your muscle, and you whimpered. He kneaded it, and you found the tension dissolving gradually as he went on. Even with only one hand and unfavorable position, he managed to find some of the spots that required touch; that touch was welcome, slight pain coming along with it was desired for the best outcome. You didn’t notice when Baekhyun must have given the bartender some sort of a sign, but the man soon came with a beer and water that he put on the nearby table. That was when Baekhyun’s movement slowly ceased, cautiously letting go of your shoulders. You felt as if you were in a different body, the tension in your body almost gone, just as the one in your mind – the moments of physical interaction were enough to chase some of your worries away.
“You don’t drink?” You reached towards the table – it was closer to you than to him – and took the two glasses, handing him the water and keeping the beer for yourself.
“Not before,” he explained curtly, which you accepted without further questioning.
“So… what are we gonna do?” you asked carefully, sipping the beer through a metal straw, trying to give off a casual vibe despite focusing deeply on what you were about to hear.
“Depends. On how much will you allow me to do.” Baekhyun focused his gaze on something in the crowd; you felt as though it was his habit to avoid a direct gaze in an attempt to sound collected. “I had the idea of showing you some things. Just so you feel it out a little. It’s not final, but it may help the both of us figure out how we feel about it. Like a free trial, you see my point?” You nodded, but didn’t say anything, so after a moment he continued. “I won’t introduce you to everything, and it won’t last as long as usual sessions, either. I’ll talk to you a bit beforehand so we figure out some basic things. It shouldn’t make you uncomfortable. I won’t be trying anything beyond your comfort zone.”
“So, no deals a’la Fifty shades?” you felt silly the moment these words left your mouth. Baekhyun laughed awkwardly.
“No, it won’t be necessary. If you want to draw a comparison to that, I definitely won’t be dumping the whole scheme on you when you don’t even know what it’s like.”
And you won’t fuck me first thing in the plot, you added in your thoughts.
“There are a few things that I may ask you here, so that we have those out of the way,” he spoke; his tone lowered a little. “I need you to tell me if you have any illnesses or old injures that could influence your physical capacity.”
You thought for a bit; the answer was important, but you couldn’t recall much.
“I don’t think there’s anything important.”
“Is there anything unimportant?” His gaze pierced through you as he caught on your wording.
“Uh… I’m taking pills for my thyroid, but it’s nothing very dramatic” you explained. “Nothing else that I know of.”
Baekhyun nodded slowly.
“Fair. Next question, is there anything you’re particularly scared of? Phobias, or things you’re scared of in general, anything overly triggering that you want to avoid at all costs?” You already revealed some of these during your first conversation. But now you felt more at ease, and you thought you could be more detailed without sounding overwhelming.
“I’m… scared of fire. And hate my hair being pulled. I don’t know, why. I can’t explain it. It’s just…”
“It’s alright. You don’t need to explain yourself to me” Baekhyun looked at you with his eyebrows slightly furrowed. “You sound like it would stress you out to share. You don’t need to be afraid of that. You don’t owe me anything, keep that in mind. It’s not supposed to feel like an obligation.”
“I-I know.”
“I’m scared of heights, by the way.” You stared at him in confusion. “Hm? Just thought it’s fair to share if you did.”
“Oh.”
“Chill out.” He nudged your glass with his hand to urge you to drink some more of the beer you managed to forget about by then. It was halfway through – you didn’t want to leave the glass with some of it still inside, although it managed to make you feel just a bit sick already.
His own drink was at around the same level too, and as you finished yours, he drank the remaining water in one go as well.
You weren’t the best at handling alcohol, and even the small amounts made you a bit weak in the knees. But you felt sober enough as the two of you finally got up; Baekhyun paid for your drinks and you left the bar.
The weather was nice, as expected. Going out into the sunlight again startled you, somehow; you felt as though a lot of time had already passed. But no, it was still the same afternoon.
It was true that Baekhyun lived nearby. His apartment was in a different direction than your place, though, and you estimated it would take around twenty minutes to get from one place to the other. You knew this area, although not too well – there were only some tenement houses, but no stores or academic buildings that could gain your attention or regular presence. It was on the more expensive side, although not a place a well off office worker wouldn’t afford; just maybe not suitable for a student. The tenement houses were old, but well-kept, and you knew that the apartments were way bigger than in a place like yours.
Opening the door for you, Baekhyun invited you into the dark hallway of his apartment. There were no lights, as every wall had doors to other rooms: two to the left, one at the end of the corridor, and two more to the right, perfectly symmetric.
“Kitchen, my office, bathroom, my bedroom, and the living room,” the man told you, starting from the left. One glance into the living room on the right made you realize just how big the rooms were; enormous, in your honest opinion, with the area of something around a classroom at school, but with ceilings that reached far up, almost twice higher than in your own place. Heavy curtains hung from the top of the tall windows like limp branches of a willow tree, giving the most dramatic effect, and – likely – gathering tons of dust throughout their lifetime. Wooden, carved furniture added to the effect, and you, in all your sincerity, would not dare to ask how much such a set cost, although it would be a lie to say that you weren’t curious. Wooden panels on the floor were already worn and grey, giving you a thought that the interiors were kept in this particular shape for long years before Baekhyun began to reside in there.
“That’s huge,” you only uttered. Your eyes rested on a painting in the middle of a wall on the left side of the room, above an eclectic-green, velvet couch, in front of which was a wooden coffee table, and which gave a perfect sight into an old TV on the side of the room, as it was one of the old-styled, small models that would be hard to look at from the distance between one wall and the other. The painting looked old, but you wondered from the distance, whether it was not just printed in good quality, with all the details of lights, people and nature making it look like a piece of national heritage rather than a small private property. It portrayed a battle scene coming to an end, warriors in shining armor stained with blood resting upon trees and a small pond of pinkish water, at either sunset or sunrise – you weren’t sure.
“You like it?” He caught your stare and followed it, giving himself a few seconds to adore the painting as well, as though he hadn’t looked at it enough despite living here.
“It’s too violent,” you decided after a moment. “But it’s nice to look at.”
“It’s not that violent in itself, I think. But it does conjure the thought of it.”
He left the living room with you still in the doorframe, staying to look at the painting just for a few more seconds. When you turned around, he was entering the kitchen – this room also looked old, but less well kept; it was cleaned up perfectly, however the furniture was shabby, with the surfaces often partly rubbed off and grey; this room simply screamed for renovation. But you felt way more at ease with the fact that it looked similar to yours – the one that was over twenty years old when you moved with and you had no way of changing it without getting in trouble with the landlord. And not like you’d want to do it at all, since you’d move out right after your studies anyway. The only difference was that you tried to make your apartment look a bit warmer with colorful lights and other cheap ornaments here and there, while Baekhyun’s kitchen was just left as it was, as though he gave up on it the moment he moved in.
“Hungry?”
“Not much.” You were still full of the freshly consumed beer.
Out of the fridge, Baekhyun took a bag of half-eaten potato chips. You stared at him with your eyebrow raised as he ate a few of these, and then extended the bag towards you, to which you only shook your head and he put the bag back in the fridge. He caught your look.
“Food moths,” he explained. You slowly nodded in understanding. That’d be a useful tip if you ever got those. The summer was slowly coming; soon, your small apartment would also be filled with bugs, and fruit flies, mosquitos, and sciarids because you kept a few plants in (discovering that sciarids and fruit flies were not the same thing was an important step in achieving perfect harmony in your adulthood).
You sat awkwardly by the table, observing him as he reached for the bag he must have left on the counter before he went to pick you up, and took out leftovers – probably from work – putting them back in the fridge.
“You worked today?” you asked.
“Yeah, just an average thing, a strategic meeting with co-workers. My working hours are not regular, so I didn’t really know I was gonna be out today.”
Once he was done, he sat by the table as well, and you leaned a bit forward, resting your chin on top of your hand.
“You could have postponed it with me, you must be tired,” you said.
“Don’t worry, I’d rather have a chance to relax with you.”
That didn’t sound as innocent as he probably tried to make it, and he looked over his shoulder to make sure he didn’t scare you with the choice of words. You only laughed awkwardly.
“Anyway. Since, as I said, I don’t want to intimidate you, I think we’ll stay in the living room since you seemed content with that,” he spoke casually.
“So, no playroom?” you uttered. Baekhyun choked on the chip in his mouth.
“I don’t own such a place. I just usually use the bedroom. Or the bathroom,” he explained.
“Or the office?” you felt bold enough to suggest, giving him a small smirk.
“No, I assure you the office is for what offices usually are.”
You smiled innocently as Baekhyun stared at you, probably trying to mask sudden shyness.
“Either way,” he cleared his throat. “I told you some about what I want to do, but you haven’t told me if there’s anything you’re interested in trying out. I assume you did see some things, so… Is there anything that you’ve been particularly interested in?”
The harmless way in which he phrased the question absolutely didn’t change the fact that he was, basically, asking what kind of porn you watch.
“I uh… I like watching different things, just out of curiosity, but I’m not really sure if there’s anything I like particularly more than other things… I suppose bondage is the biggest basic.” You tried, you really tried to sound neutral, but your voice trembled a little. “But I’m not really sure, to be honest. I’m quite open-minded, I suppose…” You felt silly; how could you not be able to answer the most basic question – what do you like? But Baekhyun seemed to understand that very well, as he only nodded slowly.
“What about, let’s say, pet play?” You blushed slightly. “You know what I’m talking about? I feel like a lot of young women start from there.” It took you a moment to realize that you, too, were a young woman. “Behavioral training. Humiliation. Regression. A bit of pain, if suitable. Trying out a few things to see how you respond. What do you think?”
“I think it may be fun” you said slowly. “Does it have something to do with the…?” you motioned your neck, hoping he’ll get the cue. You remembered the collars the other people wore – they were the main reason you got interested in the first place, after all. Baekhyun smiled, catching on your observation.
“Sometimes, but not necessarily. It’s just a thing I like. Do you?”
“…I may,” you answered carefully.
“Gotcha. We may try it out. You know, everyone is different. The collars are different too. I usually order them after I’m sure the person’s gonna stay, and when I know what type will be the most suitable for them. I can’t do that for you yet, but I have some spare items.”
“Do you have the ones of people who you’re not with anymore?” you asked, out of pure curiosity.
Baekhyun was silent for a moment.
“I do. But I’d rather not use them. They’re there for memory, not for use.”
“Gotcha. I was just curious,” you quickly explained.
“Do you have a safe-word?” Baekhyun’s gaze rested on you.
“…Not really. Never needed one,” you uttered sheepishly.
“You have anything on your mind?”
“Um, the… thing with lights? The red light, yellow and green?” you proposed carefully.
“That’s a good one. Tell me how you understand them.”
“So, the green one means everything’s alright, the yellow is when we need to slow down, and the red stops the scene,” you recited, as if you were reading from a book.
“That’s right. It’s easy to remember, so we can go with that.” You bit on your lips to prevent yourself from getting too excited with the apparent praise; it wasn’t anything big, of course – but you felt as though it was a praise in itself, being acknowledged for saying something right. “Another thing is that I need you to know a few rules, before we start.” You were all ears. “First, I don’t want you to be reluctant for the fun of it. Whether you want to be a brat later or not, today we’re just trying things out and I don’t want to mistake your attitude with actual discomfort, do you understand?” You nodded slowly, memorizing the words and waiting for him to continue. “Second. No pain that I will impose on you will be a matter of punishment, unless I specify so. If you don’t enjoy it, you need to tell me so. It doesn’t mean I’ll stop right away, unless – of course – you use the safe-word. However, I still expect honesty. During, as well as after the scene, when we review it. Do you understand?” The breaks in between the points gave you enough time to acknowledge the information and encode it in your memory. You nodded once again. “And for the last. Do you trust me?”
The tone made you look up at him, finally focusing on his person rather than the words alone.
“I do,” you finally decided; knowing very well what this answer would lead to.
Baekhyun’s eyes sparkled as he smiled at you warmly.
“Well then, shall we start?”
* * *
You stand in the middle of the room, the cardigan and shoes are off, your feet feel cold against the floor despite socks wrapped around them comfortingly.
Don’t move a finger, you’ve been told, and so, you stare at the painting before you, the warrior in the front staring at you back with contempt you haven’t noticed before.
Your breath trembles in anticipation as you try to hear sounds from other rooms – you do hear some shuffling, but nothing that you can figure out for sure. He must be in his bedroom, you think. What is he preparing? Which tools out of many that you’ve seen on the screen of your phone all these nights that, despite spending perfect eight hours in bed, did not end in getting perfect eight hours of sleep?
Your arm itches, but you fight the urge to scratch it; be obedient, he said.
Steps echo in the corridor and you hold your breath. Your head snaps to the side the moment you hear him enter the room again.
“Eyes down,” he commands without sparing you a glance; you haven’t had enough time to see what he brought, but you instantly obey his words. “Don’t look at me unless I allow you to.” His voice is stern, and it makes your stomach clench nervously. But it’s not a bad sensation, not at all – you grow excited. “Down. On your knees.”
You try to comply, but he still scoffs at your apparent sluggishness. You almost fall over as you let your knees bend and you finally kneel down as well as you can, eyes facing down as well, although you feel awkward as you do so.
“On your toes,” Baekhyun commands; something small but hard hits your heels, startling you, and your head whips around to see a wooden pointing stick. You swallow the gasp of surprise at the sight.
You fix your posture, your toes instantly begin to cramp; that’s uncomfortable, and your toes aren’t too flexible, it seems.
“Straighten your back. You’re slouching.”
The task turns out almost impossible to do, the whole weight lands on your toes and you frown in discomfort.
“Is it necessary…?”
“Look at me.” It feels unnatural to do so now, but you oblige, turning your head to the side where he stands. “What’s wrong?”
“My toes hurt,” you admit quietly. Baekhyun watches you for a moment.
“Straighten them. Kneel as you did before.” You bite your lips and nod, uttering a small thank you that you find suitable enough as the position gets a bit more comfortable. “Back. Straighten.”
You automatically snap back into the position. But it does feel a bit silly – like something your teachers would say, don’t slouch! A laughter comes out at the comparison, but you attempt to stifle it.
Apparently, not well enough.
The pointer hits the nape of your neck; not too hard, but the message gets through.
Baekhyun stands in front of you and, most likely, stares you down – you can’t tell; your gaze is fixated on his lacquered shoes. The shoes then move, kicking the middle of your thighs.
“Spread.”
You feel a bit awkward as you oblige this command; you only glance down to make sure your pants aren’t ripped – you never know. To your relief, they’re not. Then you try to glance forward – but, what’s in front of you, makes you more shy than anything, so you just fix your gaze on his knees instead.
“You’re slouching again.”
“Pets often do,” you note before you manage to bite your tongue; you do remember your conversation from before – wasn’t it what he was aiming for? You thought so at first. But the words were not thought through at all; you just felt a need to say something, anything, just like you’d talk back to a teacher when they became too annoying in their remarks.
You hold your breath as Baekhyun crouches down to your level.
You feel his eyes on you, and you unwittingly tremble under his gaze, forcing yourself to look even lower, not daring to break the rule. The seconds seem to last hours as he doesn’t speak a word – and he doesn’t have to. You feel intimidated.
“You want to be a pet?”
He stands up; he’s right in front of you, if you so much as leaned forward a little bit, your forehead would touch his thigh. You slightly crave the touch; but not enough to move, not when you grow petrified. The question is rhetorical. You wait for him to finish the thought.
“Then I’ll treat you like one.”
Without waiting for your reaction, he steps behind you. You hear shuffling in what had to be a box placed behind your back; you see nothing.
But you hear the harsh, recognizable clink of metal and your stomach drops.
* * *
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Author's note: Hello, have you missed me??? I'm sorry it took so long to upload, it's hard to find time among exams I had in June, and now my (first) new job! The next chapter is already being written, so hopefully, won't take that long. Remember to reblog if you liked, and I'll be really happy to hear what you have to say about this so far. Stay safe!
Next (Chapter 4.)
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