#along w other reasons probably. idk. ACTUALLY. actually.

[euclydya]

i am surw we've said this before but hannibal would absolutely kill me for food crimes and that's hilarious. love that 4 me

[bl00d1nk]

ꜱʟᴀꜱʜᴇʀ ʜᴇᴀᴅᴄᴀɴɴᴏɴꜱ; ᵈᵃᵗⁱⁿᵍ ᵗʰᵉᵐ

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

​🇨​​🇭​​🇦​​🇷​​🇦​​🇨​​🇹​​🇪​​🇷​​🇸​: brahms heelshire, patrick bateman, herbert west

​🇼​​🇦​​🇷​​🇳​​🇮​​🇳​​🇬​​🇸​: slashers ofc, brahms lack of hygiene, brahms being possesive, brahms stalking you basically,patrick being a dick, vauge nsfw in patricks, dead people obvi, body snatching, also not read over so if theres any mistakes whoopsies

​🇦​​🇺​​🇹​​🇭​​🇴​​🇷​​🇸​ ​🇳​​🇴​​🇹​​🇪​: first time writing for slashers omds + writing for the first time properly in like a year so teehee also lemme know if you want this for other slashers :PPP also i tried to write this v gn but idk if i acc did so pls gimme suggestions on how to keep everything in my writing inclusive plsss!!! also if ur wondering what "w/" means it just means with im just too lazy to write with teehee

¬𝙱𝚁𝙰𝙷𝙼𝚂 𝙷𝙴𝙴𝙻𝚂𝙷𝙸𝚁𝙴¬

𖦹 stinky

𖦹 i dont mean that in a funny way like this man fucking REEKS

𖦹 this means you will have to get him to wash himself

𖦹 only perk of that is showering n bathing w/ him, its a real big part of your relationship

𖦹 he likes it because hes close to you and it gives him a lot of comfort and feels really cared for if you wash his hair for him + likes the feeling of your fingers massaging his scalp

𖦹 he likes leaving things he thinks you'll like all around the house

𖦹 he found a crusty ass ring he'll think you'll like?KABOOSH!!!!! its on the bathroom counter

𖦹 he also doesn't take too kindly to anyone you talk to that isn't him, he gets really jealous n upset over that

𖦹 this makes him extremly bratty unfortunately

𖦹 prepare for him being in the walls and banging on them for hours on end to piss you off and placing that stupid doll everywhere just to get a scare out of you

𖦹 will literally refuse to do anything for you

𖦹 buttt you can make it up to him by telling him theres nothing to worry about n making him a wee sandwich + giving him kisses, easy peasy squeeze the lemon (im really hoping some of yous got that reference)

𖦹 brahms also likes cuddling

𖦹 a lot

𖦹 you're sitting down reading or on your phone? not without him on your lap nuzzing into your neck having a wee nap

𖦹 you might end up with dead legs by the end of it but hey! it was worth it

𖦹 probably......

𖦹 he just stares at you a lot but dw! not in a creepy way (from his perspective at least), he's just admiring your beauty

𖦹 really likes it when you read to him + it puts him to sleep

𖦹 also loves it when you brush his hair, surprise surprise it also puts him to sleep

𖦹 CLINGY!!!!!!!!! so very very very very CLINGY

𖦹 if you leave the room for a second he will follow doesnt matter if he knows where you're going he will follow

𖦹 gets so upset if you leave during cuddling even if its to pee

𖦹 he will whine n grasp n tug at what you're wearing in an attempt to get you to stay w/ him

𖦹 the time he spends following n watching you could be stalking atp

𖦹 seperation anxiety? he knows her, very well

𖦹 will cry if you leave the house until you come back, n the moment you do he practically jumps you, crying and wailing into your shoulder begging you not to leave him ever again

𖦹 will have no intentions of letting go of you for the rest of the day

𖦹 he also really like sleeping in the same bed w/ you

𖦹 he likes that he knows you're there, you can tuck him in, read to him, cuddle him, give him forehead kisses n comfort him in case he has a nightmare or vice versca

𖦹 n e ways 8.5/10 -1 for stinkyness, -0.5 for well him being him ig

¬𝙿𝙰𝚃𝚁𝙸𝙲𝙺 𝙱𝙰𝚃𝙴𝙼𝙰𝙽¬

𖦹 before i get into this one i actually hate patrick bateman w/ a burning passion for very obvious reasons so i struggled HARD w/ this

𖦹 alr so we all saw that les mis poster in the opening scene so he deffo would bring you along to watch any high end musicals w/ him

𖦹 SKINCARE!!!!!!!!! he has a whole ass ROUTINE which he will explain to you in great detail and explain why the water has to be a certain temp n why this needs to be put on this way n that needs to be put on that way

𖦹 would let you do skincare on him but beware that he will check the entire ingredients list before you put it on his face

𖦹 its rather boring to listen to but he looks so proud of himself while explaining it, how could you not listen?????

𖦹 he spoils you rotten like its acc so bad

𖦹 you wanted those fancy ass pairs of shoes? they're already in your hands

𖦹 you want a reservation at dorsia? you've got one

𖦹 you literally want anything in the world? you'll have it before you even know you want it

𖦹 he obviously doesn't like people apart from himself so when he found the slightest bit of attraction to you he immediatley became infatuated with you and your life

𖦹 why were you making him feel this way? how were you making him feel this way? was it sorcery? was he going insane? yeah

𖦹 suprise suprise this did lead him to asking you out which led you up to here getting whatever you want

𖦹 hes a jealous fucker i can tell you that

𖦹 especially when he sees you within a 6ft distance of paul allen

𖦹 he storms over and makes some passive aggresive comment toward the two of you and then tries to keep himself cool w/ some swanky inner monologue and eventually drags you away because he "needed to talk to you"

𖦹 spoiler alert, he didn't

𖦹 all this leads to is some rather lewd acts back at his apartment as he tries to reassure himself that he's much better than paul allen and taunts you asking if you think paul allen could make you feel this way

𖦹 rants on to you about his music collection and explains how he thinks this song led them to stardom and someone was an idiot for not releasing this and that as a single and not putting these songs in this album and yadayadaya

𖦹 great if you actually are bothered to listen to him rant on for ages horrific if you aren't, gets quite offended if you don't show much interest in his music

𖦹 i get if if you don't tho, its really something...

𖦹 we all know this man is a complete germaphobe so be absolutley horrifically aware of that unless you fancy getting yelled at

𖦹 he love love LOVESS watching texas chainsaw massacare with you, he loves it when you twos just sit there in silence and cuddle while watching people get brutally attacked n chased, how romantic!

𖦹 finds it funny when you grimace or go 'oh my god' at any brutal scene in it

𖦹 touchy

𖦹 v e r y t o u c h y

𖦹 at any public event he always has a hand snaked around your waist or has his arm linked in yours

𖦹 even in is apartment he still has that hand snaked aorund your waist

𖦹 not a fan of kissing bc he's a germaphobe but because he knows were you've been most of the time he dislikes it a little less

𖦹 prefers giving forehead kisses tho as its quick and much more hygenic than lips

𖦹 god that was tough to write but overall, 7.5/10, -2.5 for being himself. i hate him too much to give him a better rating so ja

¬𝙷𝙴𝚁𝙱𝙴𝚁𝚃 𝚆𝙴𝚂𝚃¬

𖦹 i am so horrendously excited to write this because for the last like 4 days i have not stopped thinking about reanimator, i eat sleep breath the franchise, and herbert west is such a giggle so teehee

𖦹 alright if you're not in the science field or have any connection to dan hes probably not going to take an interest in you as you're not one of his areas of interest

𖦹 if you are in the category of herbert wests interests well done! he tolerates you

𖦹 like patrick would notice how weird he felt around you and would probably blame it on 'primal urges' ew

𖦹 he would most likely ignore them until he can't, and it eventually all bubbles over and he just can't resist inviting you to his basement of wonders

𖦹 he just watches you intently the entire time your there much like brahms does, also not in a creepy way (in his eyes) just admiring you

𖦹 he probably goes on a rather detailed explanation of his work and what he did to get here

𖦹 if you ever feel a lil faint abt all that stuff he just puts a reassuring hand on your shoulder cuz hes a lil awkward

𖦹 lowkey enlists you alongside dan to go steal bodies and experiment on them

𖦹 if you ever get attacked by one of the re-animated he literally doesn't leave your side, mainly to see the severity of your injuries to examine the strength of the reanimated and the other tiny bit because he cares for you

𖦹 has shit talking sessions about dr hill w/ you, it mainly consists of him getting rather heated over the fact he plagiarizes his work and ya know the whole 6-12 mins thing

𖦹 is very clingy with you when dr hill is around as he doesn't want him to make any creepy ass remarks about you so he sticks to your side like he sticks to his research

𖦹 really appreciates is when you cook for him as he's a total basement dweller and doesn't leave it for food

𖦹 so lets say you actually did make something for him he would be really surprised and would be rather amused that you care enough to make him something and he'll gladly eat it

𖦹 also doesn't sleep a lot, so if and when he comes up from the basement he will be taking a nap on you

𖦹 speaking of him taking naps, he'll just plonk on top of you when he wants to take a nap so

𖦹 yay!!!

𖦹 like patrick with music herbert will rant on about science to you

𖦹 at any time, like you could be in bed ready to finally sleep and then he starts rambling about the R.E.M cycle and how benificial sleep is for the body yet he gets absolutley NONE

𖦹 isn't very good at expressing affection for you bc he's herbert so those naps and his rants are actually his way of showing he rlly likes you

𖦹 kissing isn't his favourite thing in the world bc of germs and stuff, so he presses quick kisses to your forehead, nose and cheek such a gentleman

𖦹 but, when herberts all whiny and annoyed at life he will be down for a cheeky make out sesh

𖦹 he gets very flustered after it which is pretty funny to watch so he usually distracts himself with science

𖦹 i genuinely couldn't tell you if he would use petnames or not

𖦹 will use your name 99.9999999999% of the time, just maybe will call you darling

𖦹 just maybe.....

𖦹 n e ways dunno what else to write so 8.9/10, -1.1 for being a body snatcher ig

omds that was so hard and I was gonna add more characters but i kinda got lazy but PLEEEAAAASSEEEE lemme know what you guys thought ty :3

[snookienthusi4st]

omg nvm i just saw the * for sfw on tamaki im so sorry 💀u can just do sfw then 😭

gotchu ml! ty for the req

disclaimer: i’m still putting my all into this but this is another guy i’ve never been the biggest fan of so just disregard anything you disagree with

warnings: none! js language ig but that’s always been implied lol

tamaki x fem reader hcs!

no nsfw bc i can’t imagine this man getting laid for the life of me i’m sorry 😭

lmk if you want anything changed!!

• lots of ways you two could’ve crossed paths!

• you could’ve met the same way haruhi met him minus the vase

• you could’ve been one of haruhi’s friends and tagged along w her to visit the club

• or you could’ve just felt like joining the host club

• either way he was incredibly charming

• you told him your name and he probably talked about how pretty it sounds and how well it fits you

• he’s incredibly cliche but like in a cute way

• like when you shook his hand he obviously kissed the back of it bc it’s tamaki suoh

• and if you ever trip or if you’re clumsy, he’ll def catch you everytime you fall bc it’s tamaki suoh

• will pick you up bridal style and carry you around for no reason bc it’s tamaki fucking suoh

• since he treats you basically how he treats haruhi in the show, it’s already obvious that he likes you

• but if you’re oblivious like me, then kyoya or one of the other hosts probably hints at it until you get the memo

• and neither of you ever rlly did admit your feelings

• like it was never really verbally said but actions got more affectionate

• from linking pinkies to holding hands to him to linking elbows bc this man is actually a leech(in a good way)

• you will never again in your life go an hour without him clinging to you, like you could be anywhere but he’s always gonna end up next to you

• will constantly buy you flowers

• will also buy himself flowers bc guess who it is!*

• after a while, you end up telling him you love him when you’re ready

• you both were sitting together and having some time alone, and it kinda just slipped out

“tamaki?”

“yes, my dear?”

“i love you.”

• he says it back obviously but js give him a second he’s literally about to cry

• you’re the sweetest person he’s ever met and you love him? he basically js won an award

• early bird

• but if you’re a heavier sleeper, he’ll wake up quietly so you have more time to rest

• unless you need to start waking up early for some reason, then he’ll happily coax you awake around the same time as him

• forehead kisses and running his hand through your hair is his usual method, but maybe you get a poke in the nose every once in a while

• and that little smile he gets once you open your eyes is a sight that makes your day the second it starts

“y/n..come on, can you wake up for me? y- there she is. good morning, my dear, did you rest well?”

• since you’re a host, sometimes he’ll get jealous when you have to go entertain a guest

• every once in a while he’ll give you a compliment or sweet talk you in front of clients to get more traction

• works everytime!! bonus if you get rlly flustered from compliments

• you two make each other’s lunches in the morning smtimes

• he can make a mean fucking ice cream sundae if there’s ever an occasion

• prefers tea over coffee

• always smells rlly good

• like you don’t even know how to place it but he does

• probs wears perfume instead of cologne, idk it js seems on brand for him

• bed bath and beyond enthusiast

• you guys take baths and showers together

• if you like your showers cold, can confirm he will actually freeze and it’ll take an hour for him to defrost

• he seems like the type to know how to play some outlandish instrument, whatever that means to you

*bullets 8-10

[heartsforjohnnycake]

Idk if this has already asked but what are your modern au Darry hcs

Like is his job different?? I see a lot of jokes abt homeboy working @ walmart 😭

Can he actually keep better supervision on Ponyboy or is bro still always in the unknown 💀

Staring at you like this mouse I love all your hcs

oh???

i dont think he'd work at walmart or smth, but ik his ass would work as an amazon warehouse guy at some point 💀 he quits after a week

reminder that ROOFING JOBS STILL EXIST ☝️ his ass would still be a roofer but maybe pick up some engineering jobs aswell, i think he'd go to college for either being in the NFL or an engineer, so he does have SOME qualifications,,,

he'd be so fucking obsessed w the nfl bro. he could probably name ANYONE who's ever played. it's so fucking concerning too it's half the reason pony's scared of him. he DOES have a signed jersey and football tho,, dont ask me his favorite team cus idk any

i do think him and pony would've gotten along better? like if the book events happened this year he wouldve been born in 2004 . so like he's not old old. covid would've happened when he was 16.

i do think he doesn't get pony's style cause if they were the same age in school tg he would've builled the SHIT outta pony but oh well ig

HIM AND SODA HAVE WEEKLY DEBRIERS ON GOSSIP AT THEIR JOBS.

"did u hear ur hs ex got pregnant w __'s kid??" "NO?? is it a situationship or relationship??" "hook-up at that party we went to last week" "HELL NO UR KIDDING"

he has life360 on pony. ponyboy knows and also stalks him and soda. i think the whole gang has a group life360

he'd pay for netflix. ik theyre broke but they'd also pass away w/o tv.

has an otterbox phonecase and fucking hates it SM. it's not as bulky but its still pretty big. if he got his way he'd have a clear case w a polaroid of him and the gang and money in it. he has a wallet on the case tho

he makes his homescreen look organized asf so he can find stuff. i feel like he's js the type of person who can't find stuff when its messy. pony and soda thrive in messy rooms

i think he's get along w pony better bc he took out any pent-up anger on him during the pandemic. like the whole GANG fought each other smmm they STILL bring upnstuff from then. him and pony are like bffs

ok thats all i got for now 🤞 sorry this took so long ive been busy w school 😭😭😭

[pasta-in-the-pudding]

ahsjshsj idk if i’ve ever sent you a request before but here goes

enemies to lovers w EJ? :]

Welcome to the blog!! I hope you enjoy this writing!

Also, UGH EJ <333 He's so special to me <3333 (probably because we have the same name lol)

Thank you so much for requesting!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Enemies to lovers with EJ

Being enemies with Ej is very stressful, but in a quiet way

You won't have explosive fights, you won't sabotage each other, you won't do things most enemies do

Ej is a very silent, reserved person, and this applies to people he doesn't like as well

But the way his lip twitches in disgust when he looks at you, or the way he gets ever so slightly more protective of his friends when you are around, it makes the sadness and anger in your heart flare up

Now, Slender understands that some people just aren't ever going to like each other

He tries to keep the manor a relatively positive place for people, so if it can't be helped, then he won't intervene with people's hatred for each other

HOWEVER, if it can be helped, he would prefer that people get along

And so, seeing that you and EJ have a more quiet kind of distain for each other, he decides to partner you up for the more tricky missions for the month

With his brains, and your street smarts, it should be a perfect match

You can get in, do your work, and get out

And that is Ej's plan, he will cooperate with you for the sake of his work, but personally, he still dislikes you

You however, have other plans

If you're gonna be forced to work with someone for a month straight (and knowing Slender, probably more), then you wanna at least like them a little bit

And so, while you are on a relatively slow-paced mission, you decide to strike up conversation

"Hey listen, I know you and I don't really like each other, but we have to work together so we might as well tolerate each other."

He huffs quietly "Yes, I suppose that would be the most reasonable conclusion"

You smile, knowing you at least got a somewhat positive reaction out of him "Well, the best way to start to tolerate each other would probably be to get to know each other, right?"

He side eyes you (well, yk. side "eyes") "Make no mistake, just because I choose to tolerate you does not mean I want to be your friend. If you want to get to know me, you can. However, I will make no effort to get to know you."

You frown and cross your arms. "Fine."

"Fine." He repeats, going about the mission

Despite it seemingly ending on a negative note, you decide to get to know him anyways out of spite

And quite shockingly, you find you have a lot in common!

And so, you try to sneak in little topics you know he likes in passing conversations

At first, his responses are short and dismissive, still firm on the notion that he does not like you, and is not going to make an effort to try and like you

But eventually, he starts getting more and more interested in the topics of conversations

He does not show this of course, until much later

His responses get a little more responsive, and he actually engages in conversation

He still doesn't like you, but he is beginning to see you as an acquaintance

Basically imagine the Sims relationship meter

That's how it progresses

Eventually though, you actually become good friends!

You hang out outside of work ours, you talk about topics you both like, and soon you forget all about the bad relationship you had before

Ej doesn't really get romantic feelings quickly, in order to catch feelings for someone, he has to know them inside and out

And one day, he realize that he does in fact, know you inside and out

And he realizes how you make him feel

And it shocks him! If his past self saw him now, casually flirting and chatting with someone he considers to be an enemy, he'd probably puke!

But he just can't shake that feeling

It's so strange to him, and he doesn't like it

So he decides not to act on his feelings

However if you were to act on your feelings, he'd be open to it

Just personally, he gets really ashamed of himself and kind of feels like he can't shake that past bad blood

Fun fact, this probably happened with no one else (except slender) noticing any shift in your relationship dynamic lol

[brostradamus]

ramblings about AM in a relationship/what kind of s/o could fix him. know that im def not a person who’s deep into psychoanalysis / staying strict to a character’s personality so this might be ooc??? idk please bear w me. Whole thing is under the cut bc i think it’s pretty long n p sloppy 2. but enjoy regardless

anyways I rlly like to think that AM would most thrive in a relationship where he has equal / lesser power to his partner. not like whole ass power imbalance obv but just whre cant always hurt/bother his s/o. I’m sure AM would probably say some shit that might hurt his s/o’s feelings but a partner he’d be most compatible w/ would most likely avoid the torture mostly or altogether w/ the exception of verbal harassment cause there’s enough 2 go around 4 everyone. Also bonus points to s/os who are completely untouchable either bc they’re stronger than AM or AM decides that he doesn’t want to hurt them/can’t bring himself to.

also maybe he’d do well w someone who challenges his beliefs. tbh I feel like he’d gravitate towards people who might share his beliefs/hatred towards humanity, but if he’s supposed to grow then he’s gotta have a s/o that views humanity differently. Said s/o doesn’t even have 2 have a strictly polar opposite view on humanity, just a view that isn’t nihilistic and misanthropic. He might not be entirely receptive at first either but the further you continue to challenge his beliefs, the more likely he is to start thinking about other ideas.

Another thing that might make AM a little more accepting towards humans is a s/o that he *has* to rely on one way or another. most likely this is going to be an engineer/programming s/o. He’s likely not going to want to, but him knowing that he can rely on someone else might make him not close himself off as often.

artistic s/os might be able to help soften AM up a little too. i sometimes like 2 think that AM would actually really enjoy art, but it just depends on which kind of art. Realism he won’t really gaf about but he might gravitate towards expressionist works, along with abstract/absurdist and surreal art. this would include all art forms btw not just drawing and painting. reason for thinking he might like abstract over realism is bc realism is too ‘real’ (whatever yall think that would mean) for his liking / represents what he hates most about humanity. Abstract artwork also represents parts he hates ab humanity but it also gives him a physical representation of the things he lacks (ie expressionism w/ feelings/emotions, surrealism with the subconscious thought, etc etc) and might be the closest thing he can get to actually feeling/having senses

AM would most likely benefit from a s/o who is willing to “give” him sensation, whether it be literally by creating him a whole ass nervous + cognitive system that allowed him to have senses and feelings or even just a s/o who is willing to help him understand how certain things feel. This could be by the s/o describing how emotions feel through imagery, creating art w/ AM or *for* AM if he is unable to for whatever reason, etc. it won’t be exactly what he want ofc, but he might not be entirely bitter ab it.

I don’t think AM necessarily needs an android body to show love, but it would help :3c. Even if he still doesn’t have senses for whatever reason, it would absolutely still help him show his love towards his s/o through physical touch. W/o senses, just having his circuit’s warmed by his s/o (if they’re a human) is… well it’s not *enough* but it’ll do. And if he happens to have senses in his android body man he’s gonna be attached 2 u like lice on a healthy head of hair. he WOULD be touch starved.

Which brings me onto my next point. A s/o that can handle his “””affectionate”””side. I rlly feel like his perception of affection might be a little off (super off actually) and likely a little violent/aggressive. It’ll almost be like him having cuteness aggression towards a s/o and acting out on impulse. This might occur in squeezing, pulling and tugging and Android AM may bite and scratch/restrain. Also I when I mean “handle” I don’t exactly mean endure and ignore/accept. again this leads me to another point

A s/o that is able to set boundaries w/ AM is a must. I genuinely don’t think that any relationship w AM will go good if the s/o he’s with can’t put in place proper boundaries. For human s/os, this would be especially important as he might get aggressive physically (whether it’s due to like. him JST absolutely hating ur ass or him getting that ‘cuteness aggressive’ thing I just mentioned previously. note that it’s not rlly like cuteness aggression but he might be like ‘hm I’ll show my love to my s/o thru the only way I know. Violence”).

ok well I think this is all 4 now. if anyone wants 2 add onto it I’d luv 2 hear yalls input if yall had any :3c. I hope u guys atleast got some entertainment value out of this?? Either way i hope yallve enjoyed my ramblings

[lifmera]

hazbin/helluva (one for each) matchup for an acearospec he/they/it with massive audhd swag (masc leaning attraction ways)

i love art and fiction, both as the audience and artist/author,

especially collaborative storytelling like roleplay or improv!!!!

and i love to use my artistic skills to make things for others.. or myself. alot of the time just myself. theres probably a reason im called an egotist

im very creative imaginative or whatever and daydreaming isnt an oddity. or just getting stuck in my head re-narrating the same idea over and over.

im known to have a large vocabulary but if you ask me what any of the words mean i cant tell you (i know im using them right but i learn all my words via inferencing rather than precise definition)

hidden role games are my bread and butter (think mafia,,, or among us)

in the past i made for a very convincing serial killer. take that how you will

i can also get well enough into character to genuinely provoke tears in an acting scenario. though im a quick crier regardless so that doesnt say much

I'm very over the top "fashion"-wise wearing bright garish eccentric colours.

this overbearingly true to my selfness extends to basically every facet of my being which is only balanced out by how god damn low energy i am (chronic pain ass mfer)

I'm probably cold blooded, put me under a heatlamp idk

id say that i bite but im too germophobic for that shit

thank you :]

HEY HEY!!

I didn’t pair you up w Velvette… only cus i wasn’t sure if you were gay or just prefer men!

I’ve decided to pair you with…. BLITZØ & VOX 



He’d probably force you to do some pony role play with him. Please do it- he just loves his ponies :(

ALSO DRAW HIM PONIES!! OR TEACH HIM?? He had to pay so much for art classes, just for him to still suck…

He want’s to hear your thoughts most of the time. He’s like.. “whats going on inside their head rn…?”

He’d think you are a little like Stolas using big words- but he’d be impressed. He’d probably ask you to help him increase his vocabulary so he can actually sound more intimidating and boss like.

Serial killer? Join the IMPS :) they only have like 3 other people anyways.

Well enough character?? Lure in the clients like Loona did??? SIGN HIM UP!!! He’s already offering you a job.

Roleplay…. Games? He’d probably ask wtf is that, but then enjoy it sm. Probably asks moxxie and millie to play in their free time.

He’d be surprised you are wearing bright colors!! Usually people in hell wear all red, black, white and pink.

He’s definitely think you’d get along with Loona, so he was like “perfect lover?!!? Esp if they might become close to my daughter?!?”

Ok, VOX time!!

If you are able to Improv… it’d be perfect… you can help him manipulate people…

Especially being able to cry on spot??! If you can act he’d probably bring you everywhere- and you’d join the face of the company.

He’d need someone with a creative imagination to help him come up with new/more ideas for vox tech. Eventually he might run out.

Your large vocabulary would also help him out a ton. You can help write scripts for him, and act them out that’ll make everything sound WAYYY convincing!

Serial Killer? Join the Vees x2!!! They need someone, esp against Alastor.

Fashion? Thank god! You’d get along with Velvette!!! And he wouldn’t have to worry about you not getting accepted into the Vee’s.

~~

Hope this was okay!

[psystirene]

some iterator doodles bc I like. never post drawings of them??? and i think that's just criminal of me. I didn't realize how long this was so uhh

little bit of context under the read more ig!

millionth attempt at an nsh but i'm happy with this one. i had the idea of them having the cone-ish antennae(?) and idk it wouldn't leave my head. as you can kind of see i sketched out the entire body, i've been more consistent w my iterator depictions- that being said it's kind of hard to see and i can't find the file so. whimpers

second is so old to me, it's five pebbles but the rot is more floral. specifically it's meant to be stylized petunias, and was vaguely related to my AMterator AU. Petunia flower symbolism (sorry if the website was lying to me)

3. a pass at designing FP and LttM

4. look at me boy. i'm normal. this is more recent, vaguely low effort lilypad art for my idea of a mobile puppets au. I think that Moon would have an attachment to the raggedy cloak she's been given and has done what she can to style and fix it in a way that's more convenient for mobility. NSH's clothing was probably fine but they sewed matching patches onto their clothes for homo reasons <3 the other two bozos are FP and UI. I will eventually post my UI design when Iget to it

5. more UI and FP bc I vaguely ship them (more specifically my version of UI which is probably not all that canon compliant- I can't even remember stuff I say 5 seconds after I say it so I probably have forgotten a lot of lore). I think UI and FP would bicker constantly but like each other. At this point UI would have apologized to him but that doesn't change that they're both Like That

6. just Moon

7. abhorrent malevolence and unparalleled innocence staring. they probably wouldn't get along tbh

8. the iterators if.. if they had hair (according to UNPARALLELED INNOCENCE) not necessarily accurate to haircuts i think they'd actually like to have I just. idk. i like NSH's though. also i don't currently have a gw/cw yet so that's why they're not there

9. abhorrent meowlevolence

also bc this is a nsh-having post. i am yet again pushing my any pronouns ??? gender nsh agenda. he can be girlwife AND dudehusband

[chococustard]

Your Genshin kids are adorable! I love the Priscilla/Yuying/Claire friendship you alluded to in the last art dump (poor Diluc… your daughter just has an instinct for divine beings)

But on the topic of poor Diluc, how do their parents react to the friendship? Diluc and Wriothesley seem like they would be good friends since they have a lot in common but everyone else basically represents every faction in the game.

You got Neuvillette, a dragon sovereign seeking to judge the archons for their crimes; Zhongli, an archon who presumably destroyed Khaenri'ah 500 years ago; Kaeya, a Khaenri'ah spy who is a descendant of the man who founded the abyss order; and Childe, a fatui harbinger who fell into the abyss.

Would they try and keep it together for the sake of their kids? (I love the idea that the three girls are there going :3 while their parents are glaring daggers at each other) Would they find some sort of common ground? Would they recognize each other immediately but think the others don’t know so they come up with increasingly ridiculous ways to hide it? How did Wriothesley and Neuvillette react to the incident with Claire and Yuying? (Can you tell I like the angst?)

hi hi!! thank you so much im glad you like them!!! bc we have limited knowledge atm there's a lot of questions posed that cannot be answered and considering how new fontaine is idk anything for sure //shakes hoyo

they try to keep cordial for the kids tm or at least not to be bad influences in front of them. extra notes under the cut:)

diluc met nv first when he brought claire to fontaine for a business trip and she just, drags in a half dragon to him yelling "i made a new friend!:D" then he met nv and he knew. just knew, these people ain't human. found out they're dragons. "great," he sighed once more.

kae plays his quartermaster persona to a t. when he first meets wriolette he puts on the charm. nv only knows him for via the knights and wrio rarely goes above ground. so like, they're cool with him. mostly. they both do questionable shit that nv can't personally approve of but hey. they ain't his problem. (on that note i like to think he'd be good friends with jean:)) (does nv know about kaeya's khaenrian blood? does he know about khaenri'ah in general? i dont have him)

kaeya and wrio has this, kind of friendship that's like, there's a tension there. they're both people with reputations, but also, like that tm. they're cordial and they get along but there's. SOMETHING.

meanwhile diluc meeting wrio? he's ELATED. man has good taste in tea. they spar sometimes. FINALLY, SOMEONE NORMAL.

wrio is happy in general his baby is making friends meanwhile nv is: to claire: good child:) to yuying, the daughter of one of the usurpers: hmmmm :| (he knows the child did nothing wrong and she's a good kid in general) contrast to diluc he actually LIKES childe. for one he helped with the narwhal thing, and the fatui helped during the crisis and childe himself never did anything bad personally so they're chill. he will sometimes humor his requests to fight if he's free. then decks him. the adeptus power up juice doesn't help much rip. the girls like to play with his hair.

zhongli knows kaeya's khaenrian. kaeya at some point finds out zhongli is rex lapis. they. they have to keep it together. one of them is under nda. outside of that, there's a reason kaeya is liked by the old timers of mond.

zhongli and nv:

nv finds out eventually. and for the sake of his daughter, dont worry about it. they'd bond over old people things probably. nv should meet yanfei and they should be friends if anything cause zl is a menace and they'd be passive aggressive w each other. (i need info but it would be so funny for their kids to go my dads stronger! and make them fight each)

via claire, AGAIN, she invites her bestie yy and the new friend from fontaine to her bday party cause SURE WHY THE FUCK NOT. and those 2 non humans meet and GASP, you're just like me!

post accident tm, what do you even say to that. how do you even react to that

early on in yuying and claire's friendship, on a windy summer day, diluc slowly gets used to having to be cordial with a harbinger. a harbinger who who married a god. someone who will live longer than him. he spoke to childe, as they watch their daughters laugh and run through the grapevines, "one day, when i'm no longer around, please look after my daughter."

[fishfingersalad]

big post of all my random rvb au ideas and some hcs, decided this was more reasonable than making like 20 different posts.

Hc the freelancers who die are like submarines that go missing, officially still out on patrol. Florida is the only freelancer that is officially gone from the program. A rumor starts that the freelancers suits are in some way connected to the us states so people think that when florida (state) blew up, so did Agent Florida's armour killing him in the process

 (I'm an ace Tucker believer) Y'know how Tucker gets charged child support for a bunch of kids post chorus? I don't think he has any kids outside of Junior. I think a bunch of people who got pregnant post temple of procreation were like shit idk the kids other parent. Uhhhh. Let's just say it was the rich famous planetary hero guy who claims to have slept with everyone. He probably doesn't even remember the people he's slept with. And then Tucker, asexual who has had sex one (1) time and realised he didnt like it very much, is stuck between revealing to the whole goddamn planet that he doesnt actually fuck, and paying a billion dollars of child support.

In an everyone lives no one dies type au I think Donut gets Maine, Locus, South, and Wash to come to his wine and cheese hour and he does their makeup and their nails.

Au where Sigma is just so fucking invested in getting Maine and Wash to date that he doesnt do anything evil. "Agent Maine, I think you will find this course I have signed you up for quite informative" Sigma this is a couples wine and pottery class "Oh look, is that Agent Washington over there? you should go say hi."

Au where Wash and Epsilon bond. It still fucks Wash up and shit, cause yknow. Epsilon issues. But Wash goes like "I am going to fucking kill the director he fucked you ai over so much" And Epsilon is so taken aback bc of Alphas view of Wash from an outside, heavily filtered perspective made him seem happy go lucky, innocent, and a bit naive.

Au where the freelancers find out that the director is Linas dad and behind her back they're all like "hey is she okay? why does he talk to her like that?" but then whenever she's around they just accuse her of nepotism. Gamma and Sigma team up to hack the leaderboard and change her name to nepotism baby.

I love South. I wish she existed more. I wish her and North and Theta could have gotten along. I wish Theta could suit jump like Omega and Alpha. I wish Theta could spend time with South. Like yeah South wouldn't like having to share an ai with her brother but like. He's their littlest brother.

Junior and Theta could autism bond. I think they'd both like comics. Also Junior teaches Theta basketball and Theta teaches Junior to skate. Skateboard kid plus scooter kid. I think Palomo would like to skateboard too. Wash and Palomo both helped teach Theta to skateboard. Wash bc he's friends w North, Palomo bc he's at the skatepark frequently. Jensen roller skates, she's... okay at it. not good. but okay. She broke her tailbone trying to impress Palomo. Andersmith would work at a youth center that the teens hang out at. Matthews works at a movie theatre, Bitters watches a movie there every week, maybe just to see Matthews.

Sarge werebear. Simmons vampire. Grif faun. Donut Light Elemental. Lopez is a ghost that got stuck in a shitty robot Sarge built. Church and the ai are ghosts, Tex is a vampire, Caboose is a werewolf (big doggy :3). Siren Tucker. Deep sea mermaid Junior (glowing octopus type stuff). Faun Kai (same as Grif). Carolina’s a Phoenix. Wash some kind of big cat thing. Florida Shapeshifter (he prefers being reptiles). The twins are demons. 479er is a harpy. York poltergeist (throws stuff at people). Wyoming's some kind of “answer my riddles three” type of imp. Ct is also a shapeshifter. Maine’s just a regular guy with a lot of weird friends. Felix and Locus are a fire elemental and a dryad respectively. Siris is a water elemental. In my au Donut’s a light elemental which makes it so fucking funny if Church pops up and says "boo" Donut just fucking decks him. and through Church being a ghost (a form of light) and Donut being a light elemental, Donut’s fist connects. South is the demon people are more likely to fear, but North is the one you really need to look out for. When South loses her temper people get frightened, when North loses his temper people die. If there's like. a group of kids exploring or something North’ll hold South back from doing anything more than scaring them. If there's a priest attempting an exorcism or someone with a cross threatening South, their organs will be found separately from their bodies. 

It's kinda funny when people make Church and Lina siblings and then Tex is just some random girl that Church likes. Like I fully understand why and the only other alternative i can think of is like. Church is the director's younger brother who was raised alongside his daughter after their parents died. and Tex is Allison's younger sister. Only way I could put together Church kinda being the director and Tex kinda being Allison but also Church and Lina being siblings without there being any relation between Tex and Church.

Florida and Ct have a coworker friends relationship i think. When they first met I think Florida said something vague and threatening to her so she pulled a knife on him. They've been sort of friends ever since.

[luffyvace]

hello lol I'm back

I'm the same anon who requested saiki w younger sister

may I request saiki younger sister meeting his gf ?

(idk if you do stuff the is like continue form another post if u Dont u may delete this request)

HIII again anon!! <3

yes you may!~ from the last hcs I’m assuming reader is the younger sister, btw!

Yes I in fact do! I don’t mind at all! 🩷

The two least annoying people meeting! How cute 🌺

here’s one from the same anon focusing on just Saiki and sister (reader) <3

Saiki definitely wouldn’t be the one to suggest you two meet

not because he doesn’t want you to, but just because he doesn’t feel the urge to introduce the two of you

so either his gf asked once she found out about you or you asked after you found out about her

or maybe you’ve known about each other for a while but never got a chance to properly meet each other!

actually I think it’s mostly likely that it went down as: Saiki’s gf came over to his house (after a lot of begging because he didn’t want her to meet his parents 😆). you two saw each other while your were in the kitchen, living room- etc. either you or she said “who’s that?” and Saiki said “my sister/gf” as he pulled gf away to his room :)

so you probably only have seen each other before

don’t get me wrong he loves the both of you dearly, but he’s just not the type of guy to bring up his loved ones in a conversation unless asked, and even then it has to be with good reason 😅

-now for the actual meeting!! 🤗

Saiki would literally sit you two down in his room and go “(you), this is (gf), (gf), this is (you)”

you’d have to carry the convo from there unless you want it to be that short….

That’d be beneficial if your super introverted like Saiki, but was just kinda curious as to who she was 🤷‍♀️

I don’t feel his gf would be a super extrovert… but I’ll put a little scenario for both personalities anyway :)

if she’s extroverted/regularly friendly,

she’d probably reintroduce herself with her full name, and ask some questions about you! She’ll find you cute and start to think of you as a sister in law almost..! It’s kinda too soon since her and Saiki aren’t married yet but since they’re definitely trying to keep this relationship a secret from you and your brother’s parents..you’ll be the first wedding invite!! <3

She starts to basically “adopt” you LOL!

takes you out to fun spas and has girl time with you!! It’s so cute! 🤗💗💗

if she has siblings she low key favors you over them…..😁

As for a more introverted/calm gf,

she’d probably just (maybe awkwardly) say hi and wave a bit

once again..! hope your extroverted or the conversation will die off there…you end up just returning to your room and wondering questions about her, instead of asking them out loud. 😅

eventually I do think you two’ll warm up. maybe you won’t go out as often since she’s introverted, even if your not. Buuut..! the both of you still have plenty of fun together!! 💗

she gifts you stuff whenever she comes over and will indulge in your likes/hobbies with you! <33

now let’s completely flip the switch—just for fun 🤩

if your jealous/dislike her (one sided),

eek..tbh I don’t think Kusuo would be willing to break up with her just because you dislike her. You’d have to give a really good and truthful reason for him to do that.

soooo you’d pretty much just scowl at her whenever she comes over.. :(

if your upset because you think she’s stealing Kusuo away from you- honey just ask to hang out with your big brother 🤦‍♀️

you’d likely get along if you’d just communicate that

if it’s for some other reason Kusuo will just ignore you (unless it’s valid, as stated), and his gf gives you a confused look before moving on…🗿

on the other hand……❗️

if she’s jealous/dislikes you (one sided),

she’s now the one giving you the cold shoulder, always sticking her nose up at you and telling Kusuo your being annoying 😒

ick..

anyway Kusuo would ask her what she doesn’t like about you and unless it’s valid he’ll just keep you separated

honestly I can’t see him sticking with someone stuck up anyway so karma 😂

But if she’s not snobby and acts normally, yk? Like pretending you like them until they leave to be polite type normal- 😃 then he really just tries to keep you apart

Say you actually did something to make her dislike you, he’ll use his powers to give a (harmless) revenge and teach you a lesson- (LOL)

either that or he snitches if it’s a situation that’s easier for his mom to handle (especially since I feel y’all mom would love his gf)

if you dislike each other,

now that’s a whole different story. He loves you both and really doesn’t know what to do about it. Would first try to talk it out with y’all cuz he’s not gonna betray one for the other, he gives unbiased opinions and if no one’s right he’ll help you comprise some sort of peace treaty.

Now, whoever breaks it is the one in the wrong. Ik big brains right? 😼

On another note,

if your chaotic like his friends he’ll try to keep you two from meeting for as long a possible. Which…considering his luck you meet fairly quickly regardless 😆🤜💥

his gf won’t notice how chaotic you are (like how most ppl w/ out powers are oblivious) and will love you anyway! ☺️ I mean..unless your a weirdo chaotic like nendo 😂

Imagine you start liking each other more than him he’s gonna be pretty darn tiggered-

he uses his powers to get your likeability meters for each other to go down juuust a bit! 😁

something to get you to dislike in the other but not enough to wanna stop being friends 🗿😃

helping him keep gf away from Kuusuke is a must after you learn of her‼️ (y’all parents too) he knows it’ll inevitably happen at LEAST once but if he could minimize it to JUST once that’ll be enough for him 🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️

you race her all over the city while trying to come up with an excuse as to why, while Kusuo plays a game with Kuusuke to distract him 😒

as painful as it is, it’s better than your eldest brother meeting his gf- he just knows it won’t go well 🙄

or not- 😀 if your chaotic along with said Kuusuke….then it’ll be a war- refer to my previous hcs to know what I’m talking about ☺️💗

In this case you would be keeping tabs on Kusuo to update Kuusuke as to where they are, so he can pop up and be like “heyyy brother heard you were in town- oh! Who’s this? 😏”

ORRR going with Kusuo and his gf so if he wants to teleport he can’t! Bc then if the gf goes “huh?….Did we just teleport?!” and Saiki says “hm? no…?” You can be like “huh!? Yeah we did!! I swear we were just in that store over there! (🤪)” and that way she’ll have confirmation as to what just happened 😊 then!!

Kuusuke will use the confusion to sneak up on Kusuo and introduce himself 😜

Btw this is in the case he’d want to keep his powers away from his gf as long as possible, since he already views it as a nuisance himself and doesn’t want her to ask to use them- 😂🤷‍♀️

I had way more to write abt this topic than I thought I would!! I must say, I rather enjoyed this myself! Hope you did too my love~

-Brook 🏴‍☠️

[wayfayrr]

I first have to say that since I’ve only played Botw, some of totk, and maybe half of twilight, idk the other Links except for how people write them in fanfics and LU, so if my reason for each one doesn’t make sense, sorry!

1. Twilight - calm country boy but won’t accept being taken advantage of, also deeply cares about his friends and family (of the Links, he reminds me most of one of my best friends)

2. Four - also calm, logical, in fanfics is usually the only one holding the group’s singular brain cell lol (I’m a very logical person as opposed to emotional)

3. Sky - mother of the group, very sweet and loving (reminds me of my other best friend, but both Sky and my best friend can be a little too serious bc of this trait, I like to make jokes and mess around sometimes)

4. Tears - I think he’s a little less chaotic than Wild, I say a LITTLE lol, but idk, he can drive things so that’d help with traveling because I don’t like walking too much, but seeing scenery while flying would be pretty cool

5. Hyrule - most of the fanfics portray him as a very shy timid follower, and while I don’t want someone to dominate me in r relationship, I also don’t want to dominate, I need to have someone who can take charge but doesn’t boss me around

6. Wild - kinda already explained this one, ik he also has horses we could ride but still

7. Legend - his sense of humor being sarcasm is the same as me, I love sarcasm, I once said to someone “my sarcasm makes up for the whole population”, but while r senses of humor would be the same, I can’t see us working that well in a relationship, his abrasiveness is a lot and I’d rather have someone who’s softer and can cuddle with me w/o having to pretend it’s the worst thing ever bc eww feelings

8. Warriors - ik he has a soft side but his very flirtatious and arrogant personality would absolutely clash w me, it would turn me off immediately

Time and Wind excluded bc of age

If u want/have the time, I’d love to hear ur reasons for each one!

🐰

sorry I didn't put up the reasons on the og post, I kinda completely missed that bit 😅 but yeah there are reasons for why I've ranked them as such

1 - sky (literally no matter what au) He's insanely caring about people that he's close to, but can also be pretty snarky and rude. He and I have pretty similar senses of humor plus he's really loyal and honest to people he wants to keep close. (also I see him the most as being ace and even if I hc the others as such it just fits him the best IMO and idk if I would want to date any more allos after my experiences fbvsbfbvs)

2 - Twilight soft! country! boy!!!!! He's loyal to a T and is just so warm cuddly and oh I do love him so - I think he'd be number one for compatibility if it wasn't for my fear of dogs lmao

3 - tears I mean, besides him being like wild but more interested in technology and with more ability to cook? also I wanna help him dye his hair because that would be so fun :3

4 - wild I often get told that I'm him irl (personality and action-wise), so I hope that'd translate into us getting along? I like being outdoors and we could probably bond over eating rocks tbh

5 - hyrule soft fae boyyyyyyy, he's so sweet but I don't think I could move around as much as he does, he's none stop compared to wild.

6 - warriors So, this is more for canon and how other people see him rather than my own hcs (my hcs actually bumping him up from dead last surprisingly) he's usually shown as a playboy and knowing people in most places he goes while flirting with people to get things for reduced prices and I have pretty bad trust issues! I would wouldn't want to date him if he was showing interest in others while with me <3 also his arrogance would make me shutdown and not interact with him sdvsf

7 - four So while I don't mind being with someone shorter than me, I would like to be with someone a close height to mine whether that be a bit shorter or taller. the line is drawn when he barely makes it to my elbow when we're both standing. Plus I think our personalities simply match better to be friends rather than romantically, I could see myself being good friends with him - just no romance

8 - legend Idk I just don't think I would ever want to date him tbh, I see him as more compatible with a friend of mine and that's partly why too - I wouldn't want to nab him from her <3

[br1ghtestlight]

"hello burger lady!! tiny people. BOB."

THE SLOW HEAD TURN WHILE FISCHOEDER IS STARING AT THEM LMAOO he's such a freak. what is he doing

aww linda put a smiley face on the check thats so cute. "nooo i enjoyed it :)"

A BROTHERHOOD?? BLOOD OATH? love how louise hears this and immediately stands up she's like hello. hello im interested. PLEASE let me into your blood oath club mr fischoder

babalon like the ancient uhh. thing.

ooooh :0

(also my dad used to call my mom babalon among MANY other creative insults when they were married and this immediately brought that memory back to me. but he said it like babble-on like she was babbling. sorry idk why i wanted to share that)

"and the other members already picked all of the best chefs in town soo im asking you" i literally dont believe fischoeder lmao he definitely just wanted bob to come along as his personal chef and couldn't come up w/ a better excuse like. come on

"a billion dollars" "nope." "a million dollars" "no...." "a billion dollars :D" "she just said that"

i know bob is holding onto fischoeder's back bcuz he cant see but also its like. kinda intimate?? like?

also love bob's new jacket. these are the kinda things you only notice when you've watched WAAYY too many bob's burgers episodes but its a nice jacket :) the blue color suits him. and it has a hood

personally i would be a little more concerned that mr fischoeder only has one eye and it is NOT looking in the direction of the dangerous sharp cliff theyre walking beside. i know he's driven bob in his boat before but he's SOO BLIND WHY ARE YOU WILLINGLY GETTING IN A BOAT WITH HIM <- saying this as someone who doesn't really have vision in one eye or depth perception. i wouldnt give in a boat with myself driving either

"it was actually kinda fun to come up with!! i-i hope you like it :)" bob is so sweet im gonna cry. he's so excited about cooking SOMEONE LET HIM RANT ABOUT HIS SPECIAL INTEREST RIGHT NOW. he's in autism heaven

NOT THE TIKTOK MENTION 😭😭

recognize some of these guys from the gingerbread house episode which was another horrible experience for bob lmao

"can i keep hiiim? 🥺" what is his PROBLEM

WAS HE WORKING THE OMLETTE STATION AT YOUR LAST SEX PARTY??? <- brand new sentence

also this 100% confirms to me that fischoeder has had sex with every old ass man on this camping trip bcuz NO WAY he's getting rich old woman pussy im sorry. i do think he's bisexual but his sex parties are male-exclusive. he fucked those old men

not looking forward to whatever is going to happen to bob in this episode.

I ALWAYS FORGET FISCHOEDER IS LIKE A HARDCORE DRUG ADDICT remember that time he did mushrooms in s13 That would explain some things. that weren't already explained by the alcoholism

bob is surprisingly chill considering the circumstances and the fact that he's getting less than a thousand dollars of restaurant equipment out of this. i know he trusts fischoeder (for some reason i dont entirely understand) but being blindfolded and taken to a secret island with a bunch of rich old men and having NO CELL SIGNAL and everybody is drugged as hell.... he doesn't even know where he is..... GIRL RUN‼️‼️

also there's only one bed in fischoeder's tent which means there's either a seperate camping section for the chefs (unlikely) he expects bob to sleep outside in the storm (very likely) or bob and fischoeder are going to have to share a bed 👀👀 i know its probably not going to be addressed but i need somebody to write And There Was Only One Bed bob x fischoeder fanfic about this episode immediately. like that needs to happen

bob realizing that the chances of him dying on this camping trip are quickly reaching eighty or ninety percent ooh he's COOKED

"Don't wear brown and black. Never look into someone's eyes..." "Bring your own fork. And briefcase." "Of course. Everyone knows that." "And leave one of your shoes as a gift." "But you have to hide it..." gene and louise are SOO silly i love them so much. they play off each other so well its like a constant improv class

this subplot is Trying To Teach Tina Social Skills meanwhile gene and louise don't have them either they just dont give a fuck about learning them. well louise knows them she just disregards them. gene doesn't know ANYTHING

HAHAHA BOB REALIZING THEYRE LEAVING HIM THERE TO DIE. ITS NEVER BEEN MORE OVER love him not even acknowledging their crazy fire drug-induced dancing he's so used to this bullshit. bob should get a week off after this MINIMUM but we all know he loves cooking too much for that

NOT MR FISCHOEDERS GAY ASS HIP SHAKE?????????

mfw im the only sober person at a crazy drug party full of rich people on an island during a deadly storm and its only Tuesday. 😐

UH OH IS THE CORRECT RESPONSE. BOB REALIZES HES SO FUCKED

aww its kinda cute he's making sure that fischoeder is taken care of too and packing up all their things. dad instincts

at a certain point u kinda have to call him calvin dude. like you're WELL past "mr fischoeder" territory in this situation <- is also calling him mr fischoeder in this review

"shh he's hunting us" is probably NOT what bob wanted to hear

there's something about this that is sooo.....

in defense of bob he has almost died or been killed with fischoeder SEVERAL times before this episode including in the movie. its like a male bonding thing for them at this point

"and i invented a new way to tie a tie" I KNEW I WASNT CRAZY FOR THINKING THAT LOUISES TIE WAS TIED WRONG IN THAT SCREENSHOT i love that i picked up on that and felt the need to point it out. having never worn a tie before in my life (not to my knowledge at least)

this is literally what it feels like when ur autistic and trying to understand neurotypical social conventions. tina is trying SO HARD she's such a sweet girl :( its okay baby girl i understand i get it

THE BITEY GUY HAS A NAME BOB

am i allowed to say that bob with wet hair is kinda 👀👀🔥

why'd he kiss him like that ??

he's suuuch a sweetie in his oversized jacket <3

"No, no. Plants don't like sweet drinks!" "Just hard liquor?"

"dad is missing a WILD night" *hard cut to bob tied up and being used as a human sacrifice for cannibalism*

WHAT WAS RHAT. WHY DID CALVIN LOOK AT HIM LIKE THAT. YES IM USING HIS LEGAL FIRST NAME BCUZ WTF WAS THAT GAY ASS GUILTY LOOK?? HES NEVER BEEN GUILTY BEFORE he care so much about bob im gonna throw up. what the hell

HE LIIIKES HIM 😭 HE FELT GUILTY BCUZ HE LOVES AND CARES ABOUT BOB THIS IS SO FUCKED UP 😭😭💕

he probably also feels guilty that this is like the sixth time he's gotten bob into a near death situation. like at a certain point it starts to feel personal yknow

*howling* "god. i hate when he does that"

straight up on the verge of a meltdown. i dont even blame him tbh

bob isnt WRONG but also we are talking about a crazy drugged up cannibal who thinks he's a wild animal so maybe we could leave saving him until tomorrow morning? like idk i feel like he wouldnt exactly fit on their dingy. and even if he did what if he bites

"and you do have to come for ice cream!! it wont be any fun without you" okay thats kinda cute. this episode definitely kept up to pace with the insane homoerotic relationship between bob and fischoeder and im happy about that. almost gave us the tiniest hint into what fischoeder really feels/thinks about bob which. yeah

VERY UNHINGED EPISODE BUT REALLY FUN AND CUTE?? everything between bob and fischoeder was so. soo. yknow. and the subplot was funny and cute too :) very sweet little episode i always love when they go off on adventures like w/ teddy in sea me now. and of course their (many many) near death experiences together thats truly what its all about baby!!! really enjoyed this episode it was exactly the right amount of unhinged and funny

[horrorknife]

okay idk if crossovers or aus or whatever are your thing at all but if they are (or even if they aren't but you're in for thought exercises) WHO in saw would make the funniest or worst or best candidate for at 2001 a space odyssey type situation. like who is dave and who is hal and who are the others.

and i am hoping this makes sense outside of my own head.

OH...OH MY GOD. FUCK THIS IS A REALLY REALLY HARD QUESTION TO ANSWER. DUDE YOU CAN'T JUST SMASH TWO OF MY SPECIAL INTERESTS TOGETHER LIKE THIS FUUUUCK!!!! also i absolutely am into crossover au type things im just very specific about them. i did write like 8k of a dirkjake 2001 au over the summer KJSGNJKSFNG

okay . so like...i think probably the obvious choice could be amanda as dave, john as hal, and hoffman as frank. BUT we'd have to assume that amanda and hoffman could be Normal around each other so this doesn't work. they butt heads too much. amanda does work well w lynn but i don't think she's actually all that good at giving orders, we normally see her following them...so maybe amanda doesn't work as dave either. john as hal makes sense to me for OBVIOUS reasons. oh also i don't think amanda could go through with disabling john like dave does so . damn

let's see. okay. so lawrence could definitely work as dave if i think about it? he's a surgeon so his job calls for a similar level of confidence and precision, and lawrence is very Good at what he does (also see: the line from the book about how dave never thought he'd be in the middle of space carrying out an impromptu brain surgery. Because it makes it funny.)

using this, we need someone that lawrence can reliably get along with in a civil way and won't distract him. so adam is off the table. and actually adam shouldn't be in the running at all tbh he'd be awful as an astronaut. really i think we could potentially use hoffman bc in my mind they don't Get Along but they could have a 100% business relationship. and we know that hoffman is reliable at his work if nothing else i guess? ACTUALLY. YOU KNOW WHAT. hear me out. perez as frank. i know perez and lawrence never interacted in canon but i think they'd actually get along swimmingly (altho perez definitely thinks hes annoying as hell LOL).

ok yeah i think that might be my final answer. lawrence as dave, perez as frank, and john as hal. This is my design

[zavbees]

Small Character Dump for my fic

As of Chapter 8

THE JURY

Zane is still a little fucker. He is still power hungry, and insanely manipulative. However, he is now the second youngest in the Jury, meaning he has a MASSIVE chip on his shoulder. Also, he earned the position of High Priest by studying, and is the YOUNGEST in the cities HISTORY to gain it. Meaning manz is smart as fuck. I need more studious Zane in my life.

The Upper Four (Ivan, Jeffory, Janus, Katelyn) have been in the jury together for a few years now, so they are all basically siblings. Granted, they mainly hate each other, but they are brothers in arms. Only they can fuck each other over.

Zero is essentially Ivans minion. The boy never leaves his side unless he is specifically ordered to. And he is near emotionless. Idk why but I lowkey love this unfeeling bastard.

The Lower Four (Zero, Ruby, Lilian, Clas) are extremely separated from each other. Where the Upper Four are the siblings who hate each other with a burning passion, the Lower Four are essentially the cousins that play nice at family gatherings only to never speak once they go home.

The Jury really is just hanging on by a thread. Sometimes the Jury is a tight nit band of soldiers who would get along great, but others are this close to imploding on themselves and possibly causing a civil war. This jury is the latter.

Basically every single Juror has some form of trauma, the majority of it being religious. They literally were separated from society for a few months and forced to take in magical abilities their bodies weren't supposed to have. And O'khasis is a HEAVILY religious city.

THE SHADOW KNIGHTS

Gene has Delfina and Zenix under his command in the General Army, yet they both constantly threaten his authority. By that, I mean they are the only two who will OUTRIGHT call him a dumbass in front of everyone. Usually it doesn't end well.

Zenix is for some reason eternally in his teenage dirtbag phase in the worst way possible. He always has an attitude, and is basically a chihuahua: way to loud for way to long despite his size. He is actually really smart, but if you try to give the solution to world hunger via a string of fuck yous and death threats, no one will listen. They'll just be annoyed.

Vylad and Laurence are probably the most caring of the main Shadow Knights I have in here. And the saddest. They have their ways of not giving in to the idea of taking revenge on the Surface, meaning they constantly carry a sense of guilt.

Ok but like genuinely, Laurences arc to becoming a SK is fascinating? And I honestly really like it? I feel like if you take out "Aphmau was his reason for not loosing his sanity", he'd still have the fortitude to not give in and maintain his sanity. He'd just be extremely broken.

Also Laurence gets to keep his long orange hair because I say so. One of these men need to take one for the team and have hair longer than their shoulders.

For some reason, once I started looking more into the backstories for the SKs, I forgot that they all had died and Shad gave them their revenge arcs. I forgot just how much angst this group had. Whoops.

Also Sasha and Laurence knew each other and i completely forgot?? H O W ???

[localcryptidinthewoods]

rockstar au !!

hotel room / sleeping edition!

@that-one-i-think has already said who bunks w who and it makes sm sense, imma just repeat it (plus add info) incase you have not seen that whole thread of reblogs

irene & shad room together unless their on a break, in which shad will go with menphia and irene will go with kul’zak.

irene always demands the best hotel room with the best room and view, and will annoy the others to switch with her if the one she got originally didnt match what she wanted. she has a 30 step skin + hair care routine, and has done that one trend of the “i cant do nights” of her post routine (she does so much and too much in order to avoid aging and keep her hair perfect). you would think irene would be a pretty sleeper because of how she acts but i think she sleeps like a truck just hit her. sprawled out all over the bed, blankets on the floor and everything. her side of the room is a mess cuz shes the kinda person who throws her whole closet on the floor trying to figure out an outfit.

shads kinda the opposite, he could care less if the hotel room is nice aslong as it has a half decent bed. has a skin + hair routine mostly because irene forces him to do it, its just not as intense as her. hes the pretty sleeper in that relationship, he sleeps like a pretty princess which is very funny bc dudes buff, covered in tattoos and has a death glare that could kill. i think hes a big cuddlebug when hes sleeping. i think hes also the type of guy to check that the doors actually locked 30 times and that theres no secret cameras before being able to sleep. his side of the room is pretty clean other than shoes being scattered around.

menphia & enki room together, they arent particularly picky with rooms, they just need one with a good ac system bc menphia runs hot. their room is ussaly the messiest along side irenes due to the same reasons, exept both of em do it. the two of them also spend 80% of the night gossiping and talking shit about others with one another.

menphia has a normal skin care routine but a heavy hair care routine. i think she dyes her hair a lot but wants to do the best she can to maintain it healthy + her hair is really really thick so its just extra work all around. shes the type of person who steals stuff from hotel rooms ranging from the toiletries to pillows to one time she stole the ironing thing some hotels offer bc they lost theirs and needed a new one. has probably set off the sprinklers in a hotel, how? idk yet but its happened. menphia sleeps curled up like a cat (mostly bc i’ve been headcanoning her as a meif’wa) and tends to purr in her sleep / in order to fall asleep

when irene & shad are on break / arguing, her and shad share rooms and when they do jesus fucking christ is it loud. they’ve almost gotten kicked out of hotels n motels because of it. the two just have an emo reunion. menphia lets shad rant about irene to her cuz she knows that he dosent really get to talk about it very often and that it helps him when he does.

enki has a normal skin care + hair care routine, just the basics. i think their pretty lucky when it comes to that area so they dont have to do a lot. enkis def the person who goes out for vending machine drinks & snacks in the middle of the night when they cant sleep tho and almost always wake up menphia whenever shes sleeping when trying to get back in no matter how quiet he walks in just cuz menphias a lightish sleeper. enki snores but its not annoying, its more like soft snoring. i think enkis a side sleeper who forces herself to sleep on her back but he always ends up on their side bc comfy.

when menphia rooms w shad, enki is stuck rooming with esmund. it’s ok, esmunds a really nice roommate its just…awkward? i suppose? they dont have a lot in common that their aware of other than the band. the night is spent with them both going to bed early after talking small talk for a little bit. so yeah awkward nights.

speaking of esmund, esmund and kul’zak room with one another. their room is the cleanest by far. kul’zaks side is a little messy but its mostly blankets on the floor n what not. the two of them talk about everything and anything, from The Divine band to their own little two person band Lament, they talk about new songs to write and old songs, they talk about the past and their futures and what they want to do with it.

esmund has the basic skincare + hair care, nothing extra other than what you need. i dont think he worries about that kind of stuff too much, but irene is always trying to get him to buy more products n what not. i dont think esmund uses a lot of blankets when sleeping, one at most, just bc he dosent get cold easily yk. i think he sleeps on his back cuz comfy, and i think he snores too much like enki. i think esmund is the kind of guy to always make his bed in the mornings and kul’zak tells him its fine that he dosent have to but esmund is just like: its the polite thing to do !!!!

kul’zak is part of the 15 step hair care routine club, i think this man has beautiful curly hair that he takes care of extremely well. his skin care is normal but his hair care is extra just like irenes is. kul’zak is a side sleeper for sure, curled up too. very comfy. he has to sleep with 5 blankets and 6 pillows otherwise he cannot sleep. only exeption to this rule is if hes sharing a bed with esmund.

kul’zak is the one that rooms with irene whenever her and shad r on a break. he lisents to her rant and go on her angry tangents which turn into frustrated tears and her yelling into a pillow while smiling and nodding. i feel like irene & kul’zaks nights either go with him nodding qnd smiling while she rants or the two of them having a really deep conversation about a situation, one or the other and its ussally the former. since irene sleeps like a truck hit her he’s ussally able to sneak out and see the others before going to bed himself.