#also plays into the dogs = boys thing which is just kinda funny

[br1ghtestlight]

actually when ppl do bob's burgers genderbends and they give louise dog ears or make her hat blue or something i immediately lose 10 years of my life

[oikasugayama]

HOW HE F--KS YOU pt. 2

pt. 1 Dazai, Ranpo, Ango | pt. 2 Chuuya, Kunikida, Tachihara | pt. 3 Poe, Atsushi, Fukuzawa

smutttt. gn!reader, multiple anatomies mentioned. MDNI

Chuuya

He fucks you everywhere.

He loves picking you up and holding you while you fuck so he can pull your body into his thrusts to hit you good and deep. He loves watching your tits jiggle or your cock bounce while doing this, and he loves seeing your filthy expressions as he pounds you.

Because of his ability he can hold you up with no effort. He can carry you through his apartment, never needing to sit you down or rest your weight against anything because gravity is his bitch even more than you are. That doesn't mean he wont sit you on the kitchen counter to eat you out, or bend you over the back of the sofa and fuck you from behind. He's an ass guy for sure, he loves seeing that thang recoil when he spanks it or when his hips smack it as he thrusts. He will smack your ass or grab it or touch it almost every single time he hugs you or kisses you. He's gotta make sure one of his favorite assets is protected after all ;)

One time you asked if Chuuya could fuck you on the ceiling and he totally did it. He supported you fully so you didn't get a headache from being upside down at all. It just kinda felt like normal sex but it was funny to you to know that the damp spot up there was from ya'll's sweat while boning. (the spot dried, don't worry)

Any time Chuuya picks you up you get horny because he holds you while fucking so often. He's caught on, too, so if he wants you to hurry something up if he's getting impatient he'll just grab you and throw you over his shoulder or pick you up and force your legs around his waist, and you're getting horny before he even starts saying filthy shit in your ear.

Kunikida

He fucks you every night.

The ideal way to love someone is to do so consistently, and oh boy is Kunikida consistent. His routine shifted after starting to date you, and now "intimacy" is a scheduled block on his daily calendar. He may not actually write it, though, because if Dazai sees it he won't hear the end of it. His schedule definitely says your name.

He likes to try new positions, new techniques, new toys. He discusses them with you very seriously, asking what you'd like, what you wanna try, what you wanna keep the same. It doesn't get boring or feel clinical, though. It's really, really refreshing to be able to discuss this kind of stuff without feeling ashamed or immature.

Like all things in his life, Kunikida is good at what he does. He uses your pleasure as a guide and plays around with you until you're both satisfied. Though he loves the intimacy of just the two of you kissing and licking and sucking and fucking, he also likes the speed and efficacy of some toys like vibrators which make you both cum fast. No matter how you get down and dirty, he will make sure you get what you want before it's over, whether that's one orgasm or multiple or none if you're not interested or if you just wanna make him feel good. He's very much a "the needs of my partner come before my own" type of guy.

He's not opposed to spontaneous sex!! Yes he has a tight schedule, but sometimes if he goes out to lunch with you and you're looking really fucking good he might have to take you in the back of his car before he can go back to the office (^-^) After being in a relationship he's realized that it's okay to be late sometimes if you're acting in the throws of passion. He's gonna take love where he can after denying himself for so long.

Tachihara

He fucks you quick and dirty.

He's got a lot of shit goin' on for the PM at any given time, being one of the leads in Black Lizard. It's even more of a problem if you're hitting him up while he's also secretly in the Hunting Dogs. He doesn't have time or the interest for relationships, no matter how hot he thinks you are, but he is fully down for hooking up with you.

That's what leads to you being bent over any time he runs into you. You better grow your hair out of it's short, because he sure loves to grab it tightly in his fist while ramming you from behind. He'll pull your head back, bite your neck to leave a bruise, and call you a slut without batting an eye. All he's known is a life of fighting and being rough, so he doesn't exactly know how to treat you gently.

If it bothers you, you can ask him to stop or slow down and he will, but he's just as likely to spin you around, knock you down to your knees, and shove his cock in your mouth since you "apparently can't take it like you usually do."

If you have a genuine need for him to stop or treat you differently, he will!! he will never force you to do anything. he'll be the one to suggest a safe word for you to use if he's acting up too much. for the most part the extent of it is him being rough and calling you names, he doesn't hit you or hurt you while fucking.

He's not a fan of condoms, he doesn't like needing them, he doesn't like having to keep track of them so he's either getting snipped or you're taking measures to prevent potential pregnancy, because when he rails you he likes it messy. he'll cum inside and push it back in with his cock or his fingers or his tongue, asking if you like being used and pumped full of his seed like a dirty whore. it turns him on more seeing his cum spill out of you, so if he has time he likes to get a second round in before smacking your ass, standing you up, and giving you a messy tongue-kiss goodbye.

[oniikabuto]

one bed!

-- sfw --

characters: kyle broflovski, kenny mccormick, stan marsh, eric cartman

a/n: i did this for a different fandom like a year ago. i love the one bed trope i just had to write a new one for south park....,,, lmk if you want part 2

notes: fluff yayyy; gn reader; characters have a fat crush on you live laugh mutual pining;

guys requests are very much open rigjt now pleasseeeekksflkdfnkjs

— ⛧ k. broflovski

sweetest guy. he doesn't want to take your bed, but you insist.

he also hangs his jacket on the door and keeps his hat neatly on your desk... which is kinda funny and cute that he tries so hard to be neat

freezes up and goes red when you slide into the bed next to him. poor boy is about to melt.

"dude why are you so sweaty are you okay"

"huh- what? yeah, yeah it's cool i'm fine it's..,,,,,,,"

wakes up with a puddle of drool and a wet cheek. he panics and wipes his face and looks over to see if you're awake. you pretend you aren't for kyle's sake. he's so cute.

his nose also does that stupid whistley thing it's so funny

a relatively still sleeper. he just kinda curls up and.. sleeps. sometimes he murmurs something in his sleep.

"cartman.. shut up..",

"what?", you murmur groggily.

"no"

"kyle??? are you awake??"

(no response)

genuinely cannot remember any of that when he wakes up.

— ⛧ k. mccormick

it's like 1am and you turn off the movie as the credits roll.

when you look over at kenny, he looks like a baby that had just woken up.

"dude, what time is it..", he murmurs.

"um.. late." you definitely did not mean to have him over for so long.

"do you wanna go home, or like.. stay with me?"

kenny perks up immediately when you offer to let him spend the night. huge, shit-eating grin spread across his face.

"dumbass", you laugh. but you kinda wanted him over, too.

he sits in your room and pokes at all of your plushies while he waits for you to go get a change of clothes for him. ("no way you're sleeping in that eyesore of a parka!")

almost faints when you change your shirt in front of him

youre the only person that can fluster him like that.

sleeps curled up like a little car

(I MEANT TO TYPE CAT BUT THATS REALLY FUCKING FUNNY)

makes funny noises

like when a dog is sleeping

you'll wake up with his face in your chest and he'll swear it was an accident. it was not

— ⛧ s. marsh

you were at your desk doing homework and stan was on your bed on his phone, both doing your own thing as music played from your speaker.

it's not until that last math problem that you realize it's late. really, really late. you look over at stan, and he's face-down dead asleep on your bed, phone still in one hand.

you don't want to wake him up and tell him to go home, so instead you take his hat off and leave it on your bedpost.

he's splayed across the bed right in the middle.

how?? are you supposed to move him???

after a moment of deliberation, you hold your breath and roll him over, praying he doesn't wake up.

he does obviously

"ow..???? y/n??"

"shit. sorry. it's late, just go back to sleep. you can walk home tomorrow morning."

"wha- okay"

he's too tired to object

plus he secretly loves being in your bed. it smells like you

snores and breathes kinda funny once in a while

no matter how still he looks when you get into the bed with him, somehow you wake up with his limbs sprawled out like a spider.

in the morning, his leg is on top of you and his hand is on your face.

— ⛧ e. cartman

actually such a bitch about staying over

he definitely tried to distract you so that he would HAVE to spending the night

he just loves spending time with you but he doesnt wanna ask :(

"but the couch will make my back stiff! i'll be soo sore in the morning!"

"just say you want to sleep in my room with me, cartman."

"whaat?? if you insist, i guess!"

makes himself absolutely at home. if you want to sleep in your own bed, you'll have to sleep on top of him or touching him.

he definitely does that on purpose

as much as it pains you to admit it, cartman is actually like really really comfortable.

even if he's squishing you to death

and he claims he has no idea he does that in his sleep

smells like a dove soap bar or like. baby shampoo and its actually really nice

snores like a monster truck engine

leaves his shit all over the floor but also offers to help clean up to impress you

(he cant clean for shit but at least he tried??)

[outro-jo]

skz and their black cat partner

pairing: skz members x (gn) reader

type: headcanon?

warnings: none really

request: yes?

notes: i got an interesting request and i wasn’t sure how to go about it until i saw this svt reaction and so i went more this route

how i personally define a black cat personality: dark energy/vibe usually accompanied by a dark aesthetic but doesn’t always have to. not super fond of affection or prefers affection on their own terms. sassy with good quips and comebacks. has an interest in “darker” topics such as horror, the occult, “dark” psychology, etc. chronically unbothered. FIERCELY protective once you gain their love/loyalty. occasionally unhinged and feral (gets the zoomies whether physical or mental/verbal). big scorpio energy tbh

not taking requests at this time/clearing out inbox

masterlist | info

————————————

chan- think of how he is with lee know and seungmin sometimes. yeah. like when you’re sitting there like 😐😒, he’s squishing you and sticking his face in yours affectionately. you’re his baby. there are times when he respects your space but for the most part he’s all over you. most of the time he’s the protector but there have been a few times he’s seen your protective side and the pride he feels???? omg

lee know- omg he loves it sm. he already has the sunshine to his grumpy with some of the other boys. so you’re just like him. his fav thing though is when you get a burst of energy (zoomies) usually at the end of the day and you’re just goofing off with him. he LOVES to tease you. not rly the way chan does where it’s all cutesy but he just kinda pokes at you… physically and metaphorically. he just loves having someone he can chill with and really be himself.

changbin- so he likes to play that he’s this dark boy but he’s really a softie. he gets kinda nervous sometimes when you’re too quiet that he’s done something wrong but you do this thing where when you’re sitting together you take his hand and put it where you want affection at that moment. like you’ll just hold his hand or put his hand on your head and he just :> “oh so you do like me???”

hyunjin- he’s finally found someone as sassy as him. the funniest thing (for others really) is when something happens and you both kinda share the same look of confusion and disgust (judgement). everything is just really calm and lowkey with you, which he loves but then when you’re both alone you kinda bounce off the walls together.

han- beast boy x raven (gn) vibes. like he is an absolute SIMP for you. he thrives with a darker, kinda emo or goth partner. even if that’s not rly your aesthetic, he just likes having a partner that’s more lowkey to balance him out but whenever you do get your bursts of energy he always matches it and it’s kinda magical. you’re the one usually teasing him and it’s funny bc it’ll either fluster the hell out of him or like he didn’t even catch it. you 1000% become like a security blanket in human form for him.

felix- grumpy x sunshine. now, he’s not the type to poke fun at you or anything or tease you when you’re in your more quiet, grumpy moments. he just kinda sits there like the sunshine he is and loves you through it. damn, is he cute. he has you melting instantly but you obviously can’t show that. he loves to cuddle you even when you’re stiff as a board, unsure what to do with affection. felix also does this super 🫠🫠🫠 thing where he randomly tells you you’re pretty (✨gn✨) AND ITS ALWAYS WITH THE CUTEST FACE SCRUNCH and then gives you a little peck leaving you like 🧍🏻😳

seungmin- you two actually have similar energy but he’s like the dog version? i wouldn’t necessarily call him a black lab or anything, he’s just kinda the puppy version of you. (idk how to make it make sense. iykyk) you two just kinda vibe together and enjoy each other’s company without having to say a lot which is super nice. you just have this like rhythm and comfortability with each other that is just so ✨✨✨. there’s also this insane sixth sense with each other where you both feel out what’s going on in the room and know what to do without saying a word to each other. the amount of times where y’all have been hanging out with friends only to get up and leave without any notice to anyone else to be like, “yeah, we’re gonna go” bc both of your social batteries have drained and you two just need to go watch some tv. you’re both also incredibly protective of each other when necessary.

i.n- he just finds everything you do so adorable and endearing. think wednesday and enid but he doesn’t rly have the enid aesthetic, just vibes. you have more of a dark side which he admittedly kinda loves. you could be sitting there sharpening knives and he’s like, “aren’t they the cutest!” (exaggeration but you get the idea) you just exist and he’s your biggest fan though. omg you smiled at him once (kinda sarcastically) and it made his whole year.

[skitskatdacat63]

Happy Birthday to Seb, and Seb only.

+ some explanations

I realized as I was making this, some of the little stuff probably only makes sense to me, and maybe people who have been following me for a while atp. So I wanted to explain some of the little details I included cause I really love them!!

First of all, I wanted to incude my original sketch for this(from like 5 hours ago lmfao), bcs I find it sooooo cute. Look at him!! Little guy!

I. Fernando's Gift

This is of course a reference to the Fernando teddy bear, but more specifically to the vettonso comic with the bear I drew a while ago. As you can see from my sketch, this is the first gift I came up, which I'm pretty happy about!! It's always so cute to me no matter its form. Though...I don't think teddy bears existed yet in the early 1700s, but Fernando found a way, okay? I like to think Fernando is all gruff in the beginning, but gives Seb this or something similar and remarks "to keep you company when I'm back in Spain," and then he has to pretend he has food poisoning rather than living with having said something so sappy.

II. Mark's Gift

I don't think this is really a reference to any specific post of mine. Dog!Mark is just an important Mark characterization in general, but especially in boy king au where he is really reduced to the status of dog by virtue of his upbringing and vocation. He definitely plays this off as wanting Seb to get another hunting dog(something he advocates for often. Seb knows it's entirely self motivated but loves to humor him bcs its cute to see how much he loves dogs. Well Seb loves dogs too, one dog in particular-)

III. Jenson's Gift

AAAAHHHH I'm so proud of this one bcs of how many leves there are to it!! I couldn't for the life of me think of what Jense would gift him but then I remembered I characterize him as horse obsessed(read: ye olde carfucker.) So this is basically the ye olde version of him getting Seb ultra detailed minatures of his cars. HOWEVER this is also a callback to one of my favorite posts I've ever made, back when I translated Seb's car names into Latin. So it was fun to actually get to canonize that in a way. ALSO! BTW! Those horses are specifically Lipizzans, which are a very iconic horse breed in the Habsburg Empire and Vienna specifically. A horse breed sought after by the Habsburgs for both war but also riding schools, and they still remain as the breed of horse trained in Vienna's Spanish Riding School today. The emperor Seb is based on comissioned the school's main riding hall, and his portrait still hangs above where the riders enter. So I thought that was a fun little easter egg to include!

Also the characterization in this is so funny. I guess I'd consider them a polycule, like they're a unit and all have interesting relationships between each other. But one of the main focuses is the kinda love triangle between sebmarknando. Like Mark and Fernando constantly fighting for Seb'cs undivided affection and attention. But as per usual, Jenson, who is on the sidelines, swoops in effortlessly with the most perfect gift ever. I feel like he understands and gets along with Seb the best out of the three, but just doesn't want to deal with such a complicated thing so he's satisfied being a bit distant(he secretly takes a lot of joy one-upping the other two. It's impossible to not crave your ruler's attention, no?)

[fan-goddess]

His Pretty Muse

Pairing: Modern!Aegon Targaryen x reader

Summary: Every day Aegon goes to the same spot at the beach to photograph the wildlife. Todays wildlife? You

Warnings: Kinda stalker like Aegon with a camera?

Author Note: I will probably make a part two if enough people want it

Other Chapters: One, two, three, four, five,

Other Links:

- My main masterlist with other Aegon content

- My Pretty Muse masterlist

It’s the fifth anniversary of Aegon running away from his past.

He’s grown a nice comfortable life as a photographer. Well, he likes to say he’s a photographer. He makes no money out of what he does, he just likes the pretty pictures he can sometimes take of the beach and it’s occupants. He never even told the village he had hidden in his name. They simply call him Photo Man for sevens sake. The kids even gave him the nickname of PM for short.

He goes to the same spot everyday between nine and ten. A small yet sturdy ledge on one of the many cliffs of sand that are on the beach. Aegon sits there on a small chair he brings with a bottle or two of water and his camera and just takes pictures. Every single day he does this.

Somedays he takes pictures of actual marine wildlife, such as seals. Sometimes he takes funny pictures of people, such as one time when he took a picture of a dog stealing some man’s barbecue meat.

Though it’s one hot day, one where Aegons brought two bottles of water to his little cliff, where he spots you. You’re reading a book under a blue and white umbrella. It’s a red book, he can’t tell the name of it no matter how much he zooms in on his camera.

You’re here on holiday with your family. He only knows this cause he’s heard the small kids that bother you call you ‘sissy’. He’d worried they were your kids at first. Those kids though are how he learns your name. He’s glad for once for noisy kids with no voice control. As one morning when he’s taking pictures of you in your bikini, red with little white dots on them, the little boy shouts out “Come on we wanna play shark attack!” He also shouts a name, and by the way your head turns and pricks up he assumes it belongs to you.

He mutters it again and again under his breath while his finger flexes as the capture button. It’s unique and just oh so pretty to say. At nights Aegon would find himself muttering your name to himself just so he can sleep, dreaming of a life together with you.

He eventually grew the courgage to talk to you. On Thursday it was the fish and chips day, and was delighted to see you were in front of him in the queue. It give him the excuse to get near you and see just how pretty you were up close and not just threw a camera lense.

You looked ethereal. A word he never thought he’d use in real life, yet it was all he could use to describe you with.

“H-hi!” He stumbled after the both of you had ordered and gone to a table to wait for your orders.

“Hi?” You said back with a smile. “Seven you have such a pretty smile up close…”

“What?” You looked confused. Dear seven he said that out loud…

“I’m sorry I’m an idiot telling you your smile is pretty and you are?” He tried to play it cool, or what he tried to think was cool. Oh seven your laughing, please say your laughing cause you find his awkwardness cute and not because you think he’s pathetic…

You smile while you introduce yourself, and he has pretend that he doesn’t already know your name. So he simply decides to just charmingly smile and compliment it on how pretty and unique it is. He finds himself though loving how you blush when you’re being complimented.

Aegon begins to start a conversation with you about the village, and he’s amazed in himself when he finds himself actually holding the conversation about it. Apparently you come here every year for the summer. Like a holiday home kinda thing which honestly Aegon can’t help himself from finding cute. He explicitly tells you this and finds a pleasure in the blush that seems to only darken.

He even mentally curses when his nickname is called out to pick up his food. “PM?” You question with a crooked grin that makes his own heart race.

“Just a nickname pretty girl.” He grins. He still gets uncomfortable when his name is mentioned, cause he just knows that no matter how much he can run, his name still holds meaning in the world.

“Will I ever know what your name is?” You smile. It makes his own face reciprocate it similarly to an instinct. Maybe the former manwhore in him wants to get a chance at that former life again?

“Maybe pretty girl. Maybe we’ll need to talk more so we can get far enough in our relationship?” Aegon grins.

“Relationship? Bit presumptuous aren’t you?”

“What can I say. I can’t hold back when I have such a pretty girl in front of me. Can’t let this opportunity go to waste either as I think I’d regret it for the rest of my life if I didn’t talk to you.” The two of you are broken from whatever bubble he and you were ensnared in when your own name is called to pick up your food. You give him an awkward smile as you walk away to pick up the food and he returns it as the two of you walk out of the restaurant.

Aegon cannot help from smiling though as he goes one way while you go another. Maybe he will actually get to see you again without a camera lens being between you? He very much hopes so.

[otakween]

Digimon Data Squad (Savers) - Episode 19

Another lore episode, this one was kinda boring, ngl. I think I was also just tired when I watched it tho, so I won't judge too harshly. I did like the brotherly bonding going on between Masaru and Ikuto. Tohma was the one to get brushed to the side for once with Masaru and Yoshi taking Ikuto on a road trip. This is what I was asking for, so I'm pleased.

Notes:

This episode was very dialogue heavy. I barely got any screenshots because of all the subtitles (I try to avoid those). I didn't notice as many off model bits this time, so that's a step up.

We got some backstory about the Digital World Exploration Squad. (DWES? lol). It felt a little too vague, so I hope they plan on revealing more. I suppose we'll learn stuff from Ikuto's parents.

They did the dumb cartoon thing where Ikuto had his hair wrap as a newborn lol. Made me roll my eyes. I'm pretty sure we could figure out from context clues that it was Ikuto.

I was a little surprised by Ikuto's parents designs, they were very distinct. His dad is plus sized and shorter than his wife and the wife doesn't look like a generic anime mom either. Good job character designers 👍

As someone who has a systems related job, I felt bad for Tohma being forced to play IT guy for the whole episode lol

IDK about y'all but when I'm car sick, I'm pretty sure multiple hot dogs is not the solution. 🤢 (The non car sick me wants one tho)

Masaru simultaneously squabbling with and looking after Ikuto was nice big brother energy. And Yoshi was giving mom friend. (Although we barely see her interact with Ikuto which is a little disappointing).

When Lalamon was like "I'd love to take over driving but I'd be useless" I pictured what Lilamon would look like driving lol. I guess she'd be too big. Maybe Sunflowmon could drive tho? (In other words, I think Lalamon was making excuses >:/)

Ikuto's scream when Falcomon calls him a human was pretty intense in the sub. Made me think about what kind of psychological damage it would cause to have that sort of identity crisis. Boy needs major therapy.

The "no matter how you look at it you're human!" thing is kind of funny considering all the humanoid digimon out there. I guess those do have animalistic features though.

[messenger-of-stupidity]

Soup is for nerds

WOW ITS BEEN SO LONG SINCE IVE DONE ONE OF THESE!!

Welcome back to the Shaw Pack Mates Super top secret and totally unknown by anyone outside of the group groupchat. (Name trademarked by Angel.)

Whether these are real conversations I’ve overheard/seen/partaken in or not is entirely unknown and shall stay that way.

CW: Crack, Angel needs to learn what boundaries are but not in a toxic way, Sam is asking for a god to save him he’s not picky on which god he’ll even rely on science it doesn’t even need to be religious, Sweetheart please for the love of the universe put the cat down, Baabe why are you just sitting there laughing?

Actual CW: Crack, mentions to others being sneaky link/hoes/sluts but in a friendly platonic way, GN listeners. Any reference to gendered terms is purely for the memes and not to be taken seriously.

<-- Previous _______ Next -->

Redacted Masterlist

Angel: im so disappointed in u all

Sam: Oh dear. What’s upset you now?

Angel: is that lip im hearing

Baabe: if my boss finds out im on my phone right now im so dead. so whats wrong bb?

Sweetheart: Tracking down a covert breaker. Cant talk rn.

Sam: Now I’m actually concerned. Is this genuine, or is Angel being Angel again?

Angel: not one of u said ‘congrats on ur nuptials’

Sam: I wasn’t aware anyone called marriage nuptials anymore, but also if I’m not mistaken you two have yet to have your wedding since you both are still planning it?

Baabe: CONGRATS ON YOUR NUPTIALS YOU SILLY GOOSE

Angel: this is why im marrying with baabe

Baabe: LETS GET DOWN TO BUSINESS

Angel: ooooooo teeaaaaa

Sweetheart: That’s what he said.

Sam: I think one day I will gather the strength to leave this groupchat.

Angel: oh ill just add u back and then kidnap u to drag u to my basement so u cant ever try to leave me again

Sam: Angel what the fuck.

Angel: HE DIDNT USE A COMMA IM THE REAL WINNER HERE

Baabe: to defeat the huns~

Angel: im so upset rn its not even funny like i cant live laugh love under these conditions

Baabe: aweeee what’s wrong bby?

Sam: Is there something I could do to help? I will if I can.

Angel: hang on i gotta wait for sweetheart to respond so i can get all the attention necessary

Sweetheart: Sorry I was just filming a tiktok with Aggro. Whats up

Angel: perfect all my three hoes are here

Sam: I resent being called that, but I also recognize my powerlessness in getting you to change it, so continue.

Angel: do yall even have any clue how expensive it is to buy a mcdonalds bouncy house

Sweetheart: Why are you trying to buy a bouncy house

Baabe: ngl i’m kinda curious about that too

Angel: well i could just buy it because ur bitch is rich rich but i share a joint account with my mega alpha gigachad of a finance so i cant buy it without him noticing but i wanna keep it a surprise so theres just a bouncy house in our backyard when he comes home

Sam: Don’t you mean your ‘fiance’?

Angel: no i mean finance im just with davey for his money but my real loves is my three hoes in this gc

Sweetheart: Youre so romantic Angel

Baabe: ikr? like just marry me already

Angel: anyways this is my way of asking u to buy me a bouncy house who wants the privilege

Angel: DONT JUST LEAVE ME ON READ YOU SLUTS

Angel: SOS

Baabe: whats wrong sneaky link?

Sam: Once again, I am confused whether or not this is a serious thing or Angel is playing up the dramatics again.

Sweetheart: I can send you a picture of my son if that will help

Angel: yes pls i miss my baby boy Angel: and also were out of sugary cereal and davey is making me eat his yucky worm food

Sweetheart: WHY DID YOU WRITE SOS? THIS IS A 911 EMERGENCY!

Baabe: dw bb i got u. just ask him why hes giving you his dog food.

Angel: oooo good idea hell take it away then and tell me to just starve and give me the chance to naruto run to sams house for breaky

Sam: Now hold on just a minute. I don’t recommend doing that Angel, also I don’t need to eat food and Darlin isn’t here for me to have any reason to make breakfast. I think you’ll survive a morning without your cereal.

Angel: YALL HE THREW A PLASTIC SPOON AT ME HALP

Baabe: MWAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

Sweetheart: rip

Angel: You’re next. - David

Baabe: oh fuck

Sweetheart: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

Sam: rip

[albusthefakepitbull]

just scrolling your blog a bit and stumbled across a post asking about Sensitive Tummy Foods. i work at a training kennel so trialing tummy issues has been much of my life so i was going to pitch a bunch of stuff i've seen work in my experience, but for me the first thing i think of if a dog is consistently having runny shits is phasing out chicken-based foods. mild allergies to chicken can be pretty common, and so can beef allergies ngl. you mentioned using nulo, and we actually tried a pair of standard poodles in our guide dog program on nulo because they had a round of giardia as puppies and their stomachs have been fried ever since, and on nulo one of the boys managed to shit UP a wall, so don't worry lol you're not the only one with adverse experiences on that kibble lol

1. we had a lot of success with inukshuk. it's expensive so it's not the only option i'll throw at you, but it's a performance kibble with a higher calorie density and i've seen a lot of dogs do well on it. my personal dog is on inukshuk marine 16 because his gastrointestinal system does horrible things when in contact with chicken, it's probably the best kibble i've given him. if you have an inukshuk distributor in your area the price can halve though so i'd shop around and see if anyone has The Goods

2. pumpkin is a classic belly calming potion, if it's just mildish diarrhea you might have some success just adding a tablespoon of pumpkin puree to meals. propectalin is also a useful supplement for tummy issues and my life would be unlivable without it, it's expensive which sucks but it lasts a while. vets actually prescribe propectalin for dogs with IBS which is so funny to me like you can get it cheaper than prescription of amazon this is like doggie pepto bismol. in my experience propectalin has worked better as a probiotic than fortiflora does, but fortiflora does have a marked effect, and is a good compromise for price. we also used probios, which is definitely effective particularly for dogs with highly explosive stomach issues resistant to everything else; it's a probiotic designed originally for livestock with some combinations blended specifically for dogs. the people hocking goats' milk are dumb though lol. goats' milk does not help in most cases, it can increase inflammation in the GI tract which is the last thing you want for a Shitter On The Loose

NOTE: if you find your boy has issues with beef, DO NOT give propectalin, it has beef in it. you will have a bad day. learn from my mistakes

3. one thing to play with are organ meats. sometimes diarrhea isn't always Belly Inflammation but an imbalance of nutrition, and sometimes an easy fix is picking up some chicken hearts or dried sheep liver and playing a bit. i won't wade into raw food discourse here, but as a warning, if you do take this advice in the direction of purchasing raw items, just know that most dogs have slightly looser stools on a raw diet compared to a kibble only diet, so if you do transition and you're like wtf? that's a pretty normal thing

and random only somewhat related doggie supplement advice i'm pitching just because it's cool: B12 is more effective as a calming supplement than CBD or melatonin. i kinda think most calming supplements are total bullshit but B12 is effective ime not because it provides an innate calming effect but because it addresses a nutritional issue that leads to that effect. as a human i personally start seeing the hat man if i forget to address a particular nutrient so i understand, puppies.

anyway i hope some of this helps your poor teenage mal and his belly troubles! wishing u and ur pups the best and i hope my phd in dog shit can be of assistance to you

i’m saving this for future use thank you for all the info :)

[becomingkatie]

anniversary trip to the mountains

Friday we left work a little early to drive down near Shenandoah National Park. We stopped in Sperryville to go by a brewery we used to like to go to after hikes in the area. They were in a totally different building, and when I asked when they moved they said October 2020! Which shows how long it's been since our hiking days! Yikes - we used to casually do hikes that required hours-long drives to the trailhead just on a regular weekend, but now we've fallen out of the habit. We'd both like to do it more, and were excited to hike this weekend.

After beers we got pizza (at a restaurant we've been to before that had also changed significantly since 5 years ago) and then checked into the house we were renting near Luray.

Saturday we did the Strickler Knob hike. In the photos of the sky (view from the house we rented) where the mountain does a lil step up to the right of the sunset - I'm pretty sure that's the peak/overlook we hiked to. The hike was pretty miserable, but in that way where being miserable with someone you love is kinda funny instead of just shitty. The bugs were awful and we didn't think about bug spray, just sunscreen. And I chose the wrong shoes instead of my hiking boots and suffered. It got rocky, and most of the rocky section was like the picture I posted, but there were a few "climb up this 6ft boulder" moments where I felt like I was at the climbing gym but with real life consequences if I messed up. The peanut butter sandwich at the top was great though.

We got cleaned up after hiking and then checked out Luray Caverns. We have driven past the highway signs for it so many times over the years, so it was nice to finally see it. Was it worth the $34 apiece to get in? Eh, maybe. I'm glad we saw it. It was bigger than I expected - like a longer walk to get through the whole thing. And there's an organ inside that vibrates the stalactites to make music, and it played "A Mighty Fortress is our God" and I cried despite not being religious. I grew up in a church with really old/traditional hymns and a very solemn service, and that music still makes me so emotional even though whenever I read the Bible I am like "boy this is FUCKED up."

From the caverns we got dinner at a little diner spot, then ice cream and cocktails before heading back to the house. The distillery had a dog who enjoyed greeting all of the patrons. I enjoyed being greeted by a dog. But it wasn't climate controlled inside so the 90+ deg outdoors was more comfortable than inside.

Lastly, we stopped by Patty O's cafe on the way home. There's an inn with a very fancy Michelin starred restaurant in Washington, VA, and the chef there opened up this more casual cafe across the street. It's super cute and I really wanted to try it, but the vibe was better than the food. There was a live bluegrass band playing, and although I was bummed at first because it made it hard to hear each other talk, it was a nice atmosphere. The food was good but not mind-blowing. We also got some treats from the bakery to take home, and they were similarly good but not amazing. Except the chocolate mousse. That was mind-blowing, as much as a simple chocolate mousse could be.

Overall it was a really nice weekend getaway a few hours from home!

[1waveshortofashipwreck]

Hiii my love, can I ask for a ship? Sorry if it’s long or formatted wrong, thank you in advance 🫶🏼🫶🏼

I’m a female (she/her) , i have big heart, i’m funny, I like to relax, and I can be a bit of a grandma sometimes when it’s just me around the house, but otherwise i’m quite energetic . I love to chill and listen to music. I can have a bit of a short temper at times (I just think it’s because I don’t put up with peoples bs LMAO), I can also be very stubborn, i’m very loyal, like VERY loyal and I will always stick up for the people i love and go above and beyond to make the people around me happy. (which I think that can also lead me to being hurt or misused by friends)

I can be a little emotional at times, maybe a little dirty minded too lol, i love to cook, i’m a dog lover (really just an animal lover at that), and i’m competitive and passionate. I’m a very driven person and if it’s something I want to do i’ll make SURE it gets done. I Make up my own rules and I don’t give into unfair ideas that are put up around me. I lead with my heart and my emotions and if that gets me into trouble then so be it. i also LOVE scary movies, true crime, all that stuff, i’m also a SUCKER for reality tv 😭 (tlc does have some good drama though)

I would say I’m charming and it’s more of my words and my smile that gets the guys. I’m a bit of a germaphobe and maybe little ocd. Imma southern gal who’s very short, (5.0) I think I have more of an innocent look (despite my wild attitude LMAO) I have big brown eyes, wavy light brown hair, big lips, only like a couple light freckles on my nose ( you can see them better in the summer) , button nose, and an olive skintone that has paled over time, I would say I have more of a petite/hourglass figure but I think my chest is what catches people’s eyes (Im a size DD LOL) I have high standards, I can be very sympathetic, and I also can usually tell when people are in pain or when their vibe is off in general. I usually just joke or “laugh it off” and I can be very deadpan when something bothers me, or if it’s something that really hurt me I usually just shut down and become cold or distant. i’m an INTP, My hogwarts house is Hufflepuff ( even though I honestly thought I was a slytherin for so long 😭) My love language is physical touch for giving and acts of service as receiving (it’s really just the little things and showing that you care about what I’m saying or just being thoughtful). I grew up with brothers so i love watching sports and playing them (We grew up in a very competitive household lol) i’m very very family oriented, I’m a sagittarius, I like to play the piano, and read and write in my free time. and In the summers I love to fish and swim at my boathouse. And springtime is my favorite season.

For a guy, I wouldn’t really care about looks or any of that! I don’t have a type at all 😅 Just someone that can take care of me right. Sorry if this is long! Love you, Em!!!! 🩷🩷🩷

MY LOVE NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR THE LENGTH OF AN ASK I THRIVE OFF OF IT AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!

Alright so this one just kinda came to me out of nowhere while I was reading your thing and the more I read the more it just seemed to fit!! I ship you with…

Floyd Talbert!!

Song from my playlist that reminds me of y’all - Crazy Little Thing Called Love by Queen

How you met

So you both were in the pub in England where Buck and everyone were playing darts

Tab was just being his usual flirty self until he saw you

You were out just having a blast with your friends and he saw your smile and just

That's it he's Sold

So he sauntered over to you to try and put on his usual charm but your own way with words and just how PRETTY you are completely threw him off

So yeah sweet boy stumbles over his words and when you call him cute he just

Talbert.exe has stopped working

Suddenly your friends call you over so you give him a little wave before walking off but not before he asks you to dinner

Cue Talbert sneaking off in the middle of the night to see you whenever he can so y’all can sneaky make out like a couple of teenagers

How he knew he loves you

Ok so I picture it happening maybe you met up with him in Paris while he had some leave time

You and Tab and your friends were all out drinking and having a good time

Until someone bumps into one of your friends and gives them a glare

Like “watch where you’re going asshole”

And because your hands are rated E for Everyone of course you try and go to town

Until Talbert holds you back because he doesn’t want you to get hurt

Just… seeing your passion and loyalty to your friends, how much you cared, the fire in your eyes…

Something just clicked for him, he knew then and there he was in love with you

He tells you as he walks you back to your hotel room, standing outside the door, arms wrapped around your waist

He’s worried you won’t believe him because of his flirty reputation, but the look in his eyes when he says he loves you makes your heart just MELT

Of course you say it back because who wouldn’t

Before his leave is up y’all make the decision that you’ll go back to Kokomo with him after the war

A conflict and how y’all resolved it

So it’s after the war, both of y’all had long days, already on edge

Tab comes through the door and, instead of the welcome home kiss you always expect, he just goes straight to the kitchen, right passed you

You follow him because you’re worried about Tab, like, this never happens?? Tf??

You knew Tab had a temper but this felt different

You ask if he’s okay and he just stays silent

You ask him again in a quiet tone, “Floyd, talk to me.”

“Why should I? You don’t tell me everything. Why should I tell you anything?”

It just comes out of nowhere and cuts like a knife

Tab kept ranting, and you’re able to gather that apparently, a coworker that loves to get under Tab’s skin mentioned that he saw you at a bar flirting with a bunch of guys (literally never happened, you’ve been at home taking care of Trigger all week cuz he was sick)

Just… 1) the fact that it’s a lie… 2) the fact that Tab believed him??? Did he really have that little faith in you and your relationship????

The fight just blows up out of proportion, tears are shed, voices go raw, feelings DEFINITELY get hurt

Finally y’all just hit a wall so you just take Trigger out for a walk without saying a word

During the walk your brain just goes a million miles a minute

You thought your relationship was deeper than this?? Has it been like this the whole time but you just had rose colored glasses on??

You didn’t want to go home, but you knew Trigger was getting tired, and it was getting dark.

When you walk in the door, you see dinner on the table (your favorite), and Tab waiting for you, his eyes clearly red and puffy

“I… I can’t begin to say how sorry I am…”

He just looks at the floor ashamed

Tab takes a moment before quietly explaining that, when his coworker said what he did, it just hit different…

Tab never told you this, but he really doesn’t feel like he deserves you

Like, in Tab’s brain, you could go and pick someone ten times better than him, so why don’t you?

Tab got so scared, but he didn’t want to show it, so he got angry

By the end his cheeks are stained with tears, still looking at the floor

He’s so shocked when he feels your arms around him

“Floyd, you’re the silliest man I know”

At first he’s super confused, but you explain how much you love him and how you can’t imagine your life with anyone else

He just lets out a sob of relief and kisses you with the most love and passion you ever felt

Honestly it was rough but you’ve never felt closer to Tab than in that moment

Your Happily Ever After

Always taking care of Trigger together

Trigger needs a bath? Floyd “accidentally” aims the hose at you and starts a water fight

Trigger needs a walk? You have his leash on one hand, and Floyd’s butt in the other

SUPER romantic relationship, like, y’all are just constantly flirting with each other and it’s simultaneously disgusting and adorable

A silly headcanon about your relationship!

Ok but hear me out…. Once a week, y’all have a self-care night and it’s SO CUTE

Y’all help each other put on face masks, give each other massages

You just love to help each other relax and feel refreshed and rejuvenated after a long week

Sometimes Trigger gets in on the fun and y’all give him a little paw-ssage and he is in heaven

Honestly just being in that space with the two boys you love most feels like heaven to you

Aaaaaaa thank you for being my first ship Mac!!! Hope you like it ❤️✨

[sieglinde-freud]

Can I get you started on the derailment of Duncan and Courtney?

what is this, a total drama vent blog now? but yeah you can :) under cut

i think the derailment of courtney is like five thousand times more annoying than duncan but that might j be bc i dont really like duncan (hes fine in island, kinda boring in action (didnt deserve his win idgaf that shouldve been harold there. yes im still mad lindsay went home instead of him in rock n rule), and the entirety of that mid section of world tour just revolving around him and the stupid love triangle drama is SO annoying. and then he makes final five FOR WHAT??? FOR WHAT???? im sick of his ass. what was i talking about. right) but either way theyre both two very major characters so its just really sad to see them both fall victim to horrible characterization? cuz you start in island right and in general island is a lot more grounded than the other seasons and leans more into the fact that theyre all 2000’s teenage stereotypes so in island theyre just the good ol cliche good girl/bad boy couple its iconic, its cute, WAY more entertaining than gwent (but they get a pass cuz gwen was basically the main character of that season. u go girl. go get that bag AND that boring wet dog man) and its just nice. courtney shows signs of being controlling but for the most part duncan’s attitude gets courtney to loosen up a bit and have fun and courtney made duncan a better person.

and then action happens and then courtney is like. rightfully mad she got screwed out of the season after harold gets her kicked off and no one gaf but its like. you can see where this could go and it doesnt look great. not much happens for duncan except he gets more insufferable bc they didnt give him any friends this season? unlike when he geoff and dj to bounce off of now he just picks fights with harold and the other gaffers which IS funny but. basically action is where the red flags start being put up. their relationship is. fine. like i liked it at the time but knowing where it heads is upsetting. anyways

then u get to world tour and theyre close to their island dynamic again (with the exception of gwen being there…) but then duncan quits first episode which i think was actually a great choice bc of how courtney finally gets to stand on her own as a character without him (i actually really like duncney. but her character was always tied to him in some way yk?) and make her own friends and it was looking great! until i see london and everything goes to shit. dude comes back, cheats on courtney, and then everyone on that god forsaken plane gets involved. first of all, ISLAND DUNCAN WOULD NEVER??? no fucking way. not even action duncan. dude was HOOKED on her crazy ass. AND FOR GWEN?!?! who has never been the same since island but thats a different thing. but they had literally zero romantic chemistry. all they have in common is that theyre both alt kids. NOT EVEN THE SAME KIND OF ALTERNATIVE! just alt. ugh. and then courtney gets sent into a spiral which, is a valid reaction to getting cheated on i do not blame her. and w/ someone you thought was ur friend like i GET IT. and i am on her side. but then her character goes back to ONLY EVER BEING ABOUT DUNCAN except this time its how much she hates him and her character just. pauses! she doesnt go anywhere else from i see london until shes eliminated inn… what was it. chinese fakeout? like shes just a hater who makes zero meaningful relationships aside from getting played by alejandro and shes just. like its just. its not good. and to know that any of this only happened bc the producers forced a duncney break up. girl sit DOWNNN

and then all stars just tramples them even more. since when has duncan ever gave a shit what people think of him? jojo siwa acting ass with this “im a bad boy!1!!!!” act island duncan would never. and then courtney. ohh courtney. she got flushed down a toilet force feeding herself ice cream with bird shit on it. all i gotta say (but also. nerfed bc she literally has an iron stomach in chinese fake out. whatever)

i still love them though. well, i love courtney. duncans alright but still neither of them deserved any of that

[autisticbokutoenthusiast]

ep 6 playboyy rewatch stray thoughts

- not gaga auto jumping to nont and jump 👀 guess i rewatch that scene often….

- headlines: someone making noise complaint was killed, drunk partygoer shoots friend, i heard “lgbtq” but didn’t see subs about it…, leaked photos of elites partying on a. yacht with drugs and women

- the section in english is interesting is this a convo between nuth aob and puen?

- i feel like we don’t talk about this aobpuen scene enough….

ep 6 the truth is a glass of wine

- here we have the framing of the baddies but porsche is always cropped out

- zouey being like “we should throw a party” and first and captain immediately start discussing which animals to dress as. i see you

- kerjiejr nont like can yall be serious we are not having an animal themed party…. the theme will be sexy sleepwear skdjrkkrrjjr

- captain is such a menace akjsjdjsjejr wait why are his nails so long i thought he played rugby

- ZOUEYTEENA i’m popping them in my mouth

- is this rooftop the baddies? like what doesn’t their house have damn

- porsche being a menace for no reason

- get it tutor!! yes jump suck that boobie!!

- jump is so tired free my mans jdjdjdjjd on the phone sucking and moaning like it better be teena on the other line

- the sunglasses JUMP HAS CHAIN NECKLACE

- aob can do anything except role playing he’s in love with puen… aobpuen enthusiasts we are so back

- i can’t pretend to be in love with you because be- because because you’re not pretty… enough!!!

- aob crying scene oh i forgot…

- aob also in a chain necklace aurrrkay

- nont on the verge of just giving up

- promnont scene of all time “sex doesn’t change you, just reveals things… is there anything you want to reveal”

- jump walking into the party pointing at prom and walking away my autistic meow meow if this production. he also lookin like a whole meal

- first is so fucking dramatic skdjjdkd if jejdjjg

- why are you toasting me we’ve accomplished jack shit go solve the fucking murder

- it’s the way porsche zouey and prom have similar outfits….

- nonts boots don’t go with the rest of the fit… i’m sorry but it’s true. still love this fit tho

- captain is a FUCKING MENACE kaksjdjd that’s my boy

- discord peeps who said teena had sadistic sex with jason…. i’m starting to think yall are right

- zouey kinda taken himself out here cause he tried to have sex with teena and jump like now look where we are zouey you should have asked a different question skdjdjjdjfj

- wtf is going on with the belly button on captain rn 🤨

- why jump and keen kinda eyeing eachother up a ton like ok…

- PROM AND NONT YOURE FIRST SCENE TOGETHER NONT WORE A MASK PUT YOUR FINGIES DOWN

- i’m obsessed with jump teena soong hanging out also them all teasing jump for being a himbo i love them

- FIRST HAS BEEN STANDING ANGSTILY ON A CHAIR THIS WHOLE TIME AKDJJDJDJRJD

- does jump know jason is the daddy….

- “if we play more games we’ll definitely know” <- me when i’m about to be proven wrong skdjdjjr

- jump and teena hyping eachother up im gonna screammmmmm oh proms there too?!?!?!

- jump in the bg is killing me he’s so fucking funny

- i’m jumping on the teena can’t dance train yall im gonna roast tf outta this boy

- teena straight jamming through all the drama ekktkkrjjt teena is the only character in a romcom im obsessed with him

- teena got thr puppy dog eyes out someone help my man

- “you can choose to be masculine but be awful or be a pussy and not hurt people” ok zouey

- and teena returns to heal position

- captainkeen the only ones who understand the assignment of this game aksjjdkdk

- hold on what goes on with zoueys jacket….

- zouey first and teenasoong being chaotic besties yessss

- jump also understood the assignment

- “twins are so identical” always takes me out like he just says what comes to mind but this is the thing that makes nont want to burn him alive

- jump seems into the wax play before nont starts… being nont…. so noted

- nant appears to at least 3 characters as haunting visions…. aurrrrkay

- the lighting in this nuthphop scene is absolutely fantastic

- prom being so worried for porsche….

- porsche tells prom “if he finds out you gave nant his money he will kill both of you…” which might not mean anything but also….

- phop in his pearls and chains

- oh nuth…..

- nont really loves masks like ok

- here we go captain being a menace

- it’s soongs room?!??!? what?!?! do they all live in the same abandoned hotel?!?!? do they not run into eachother?!?!?!

- captain being a menace again skdjdis

- the bloody handprint still fascinates me

- poor nuth once again. kinda obsessed with nuth going through it in the corner and phop just continuing on. like it’s probably an average day for them…….

- nuthphop enthusiasts how we feeling… who else feels like they’re about to pass out…

- i’m kinda obsessed with the turn of events. like nuth being like i just got got on vid cam cause i was trying to be horny about the fact you made me so jealous i wanted to kill you…. wanna be my bf?

- i love this scene actually….

[floralcrematorium]

Ooooo what are your headcanons about Alfred's insecurities!? 8)

oops! i get really infodumpy. there's Migraines in Margaritaville context at the beginning and headcanons for this AU's Alfred's insecurities alllll the way at the end. if you just want to skip to it there's be a header in pink that says Woe, Insecurities Be Upon Alfred. anything that i talk about in the context section is stuff I've already talked about in the prologue and first chapter of the fic, found here, or information that isn't relevant enough to be mentioned in the fic and is more fun fact

okay so I came up with a really funny way to refer to Migraines in Margaritaville whenever I'm mentioning that fic casually

I will now refer to anything regarding that fic as The Margaritaverse

Anyway, to give a quick recap on Margaritaverse Alfred and Matthew:

Alfred (Kirkland-Bonnefoy) F. Jones is a popular Youtuber living just outside of New York City. His channel is all about food. You could consider him a food critic, but he also tries strange vintage recipes, debunks Tiktok recipes, and explores the cookbook left to him by his Papa when he and Alfred's dad moved back to Europe (The prologue actually starts off with him cooking a cake from his childhood that will be relevant later). He lives alone and doesn't have many friends aside from his old college roommate and Kiku Honda, a fellow popular food Youtuber (and full time surface design illustrator) who he met at Vidcon the year prior. His entire life right now is making content for Youtube because even though he's got a double degree in finance and marketing, he can't manage to find a job in his field

Matthew (Kirkland-Bonnefoy) Williams is a hockey star who moved to Montreal, Quebec immediately after college. Fun fact, he actually lives in Kirkland, which is a suburb of Montreal (I literally only chose it because of the name). He's been playing hockey practically his whole life and spends as much time outdoors as possible. He's doing really well for himself; He's got a lovely Samoyed dog named Kumajirou, a house (in this economy???), and his girlfriend of three years, Kateryna (I'm still not set on a last name for her, but I've been using Chernenko because that's what I've seen floating around. I'm up to suggestions!)

Alfred and Matthew are identical twins who grew up in Massachusetts. Never been quite set on how the boys came to be other than being born in 1998, so whether they're fully adopted or related to just one of their dads is up in the air. Regardless, they grew up unable being to escape being compared at home, at school, and anywhere really.

Alfred's insecurities stem from Matthew receiving a lot of attention from their dads. I thought it'd be fun to play with the idea that Alfred was accidentally ignored rather than Mattie and see what That Does To Him. Alfred's not a quiet kid -- he kinda just has a hard time fitting in. Not gonna lie, he probably has the Neurodivergent Kid Experience of being isolated from your peers for being "different." We see this in Chapter One of MIM when Alfred is excluded from a birthday party by their peers when Matthew is invited and he doesn't really fit in with the group his brother hangs around (Mattie tries to include him, to limited success). When Matthew picks up hockey, everything suddenly becomes about Matthew because he needs to be driven to practice, he needs equipment, oh no! he got hurt, and he also turns out to be pretty dang good at this thing.

Unintentionally, Alfred gets shoved to the wings.

Both Francis and Arthur have separate things they like to do with both sons. Alfred and Francis' thing is cooking. Alfred picks up a love for anything in the kitchen thanks to Francis, who is more than eager to teach him anything he knows. My favorite thought is that Alfred is the better cook but will eat almost anything, while Matthew can cook to get by but has a more refined taste (unless he's high, which in that case anything goes).

By the time of the events of MIM, the boys are estranged. I can't tell you everything just yet because spoilers, but they haven't seen each other in three years and Alfred's a bit resentful about it. He's tried to contact Mattie, but he's always too busy and eventually Al gave up.

Woe, Insecurities Be Upon Alfred

☆ Alfred's inability to get a real job makes him majorly jealous of Matthew. He spent years studying to get a double major degree to impress their parents in something he doesn't even like for none of it to pay off. Francis and Arthur aren't disappointed in Alfred, but they don't take his job as seriously as they do Mattie's

☆ Follow up to the point above, when Matthew got drafted into the NHL (I never name the team but I know Montreal has their own team so it's up to the reader if he plays for them or someone else), it felt like a shot in the heart to Alfred. He wonders if he could've had something like something Matthew's career if his dads poured everything into it like Matthew's hockey training

☆ Matthew was able to make so many friends when they were younger whereas Alfred couldn't. Nobody wanted to talk to Alfred about the things he liked, which made him really upset, because he knew sooooo much about those things! Matthew excelled socially because he's witty and thinks before he speaks whereas Alfred had to learn how to do those things. He's a bit blunt and when he tries to make jokes they really only make sense to him

☆ Alfred doesn't think his parents love Mattie more than him, but sometimes it felt that way growing up. Their schedules revolved around Matthew's games because he was the team's best player

☆ Alfred is jealous that Matthew's taller. This is literally the smallest thing, especially since he's only shorter by a couple of inches, but it's still something

☆ Alfred puts on an entirely different persona for his Youtube channel. He's more animated, he writes jokes, he does things that cater to his audience, and ultimately isn't entirely himself. I think it's a form of masking because he had to figure out a way to make himself more likeable to other people

☆ He doesn't know much about Matthew's partner except for the fact that they've been together for three years and she's from Ukraine. He doesn't know her name or what she even looks like until the Prologue/Chapter One. There's some contention here for reasons I can't mention yet ;)

☆ Matthew is a very private person because of his fame. Alfred also is (they both use fake last names for their careers so they can maintain some sort of privacy in their day-to-day). Alfred doesn't understand why this privacy also extends to him. He's Matthew's brother. His twin. Why is he shut out?

☆ Alfred's channel being food related calls back to his favorite past-time with Francis. His designated bonding activity with Arthur was watching bad old movies (I think they both love Monty Python and the Holy Grail, though), but he can't really do much with that. Maybe occasionally he recreates food from shows and movies his Dad likes, to bring both of his parents into one activity. Anyway, cooking and food is a way for him to feel connected to his Papa in a way Matthew never was. It's like something untainted by Matthew's success since he was never too interested in the complicated meals Francis cooks. Alfred wonders if he would feel different if he went to culinary school instead (he didn't go because being stuck in a kitchen for so long and at odd hours like Francis didn't seem appealing not like business is any better)

TLDR: Alfred is a very jealous person because of a variety of factors and internalizes his failures (which aren't really even failures). He spends MIM working through his jealousy for his brother and is constantly back and forth between being excited to see Mattie after so long and feeling inferior to him since Matthew seemingly has it all

anyway. all this to say I really need to start workin on Margaritaverse again. I think they're supposed to go to like. three margartiavilles in that chapter? I'm not sure, I need to refamiliarize myself with my giant Lore doc and make edits with my fresh eyes

[aldi-spice]

Retirement home anon again: I’d like to get your opinion on this (if you have one), it’s gonna be long sorry 💀

I bought Story of Seasons: A wonderful Life for the Nintendo switch which is a remake of the 2003 harvest moon a wonderful life.

I’ve bought other harvest moon/story of seasons games for the switch as well and honestly… I’m disappointed.

The character design lacks, they all look so dead and emotionless I don’t know how to explain it. The whole world looks like it’s straight out of Cocomelon. You also start with a gifted Cow and other things, that you’d normally not get in the originals and tbh it feels like they stripped all life away in all the newer versions, made it way easier in the beginning and tried to up the cuteness to a maximum which resulted in it looking like a kids show. The dialogs also turned so soft imo.

In harvest moon ds you straight up start with the mayor of mineral town insulting you and then the character (you) proceeding to try to kill him/punch him with an axe, a hammer, a scythe, even a watering can and in the end your dog bites him in the ass in a blackout screen.

It’s like how they took the sass out of the animal crossing characters with time and it just makes me sad. The new versions of the characters feel like lifeless copies :/

I‘m still hoping for more remakes and I’m still a big fan of the harvest moon/story of seasons franchise. But fields of Mistria honestly gave me the exact feeling I had when I got harvest moon ds on Christmas as a kid and started it up for the first time. I literally had a bit of a teary eye playing the demo and then the EA version of FoM 🥺

That’s also why I like FoM so much - it’s funny, it has innuendos, it’s made for adults/older teens despite it being cutely designed, the characters look and feel like they’re adults as well.

I‘m not trying to be mean to the newer games and I understand people enjoy playing them, hell I still buy them because I love the series, but they leave me hanging. ://

YESSSS I get it OMG it's so boring I have about 100 hours in PoOT (pioneers of olive town) and although I controversially found Harvest Moon One World better than Olive Town (I loved the open world concept and Jamil in particular), it was still kinda boring compared Stardew Valley which I bought as my first game for my switch back in 2019.

That day, I played SDV until 4 am, it was summer break and I just graduated highschool and it was magical playing SDV for the first time, I could barely put the game down for long enough to take care of myself lol.

And I get that exact same feeling again playing FoM, that kind of magical feeling where you're completly transported into a new world. I don't think ConcernedApe made SDV with children as a primary audience in mind, if he did he probably wouldn't have added depressed alocholic in there and I love it, I love a good story and good characters, inperfect characters with flaws, they feel way more real and more likable than the boring nice, polite ones we were getting in newer HM/SoS games. All I remember from PoOT is how claustrophobic the town feels, and how hard it was to decide who to marry because none of them was interesting enough, even Damon, the edgy biker boy, felt like he was taken straight from the Disney Channel. I want characters that I can call bastards, I want mean characters, they're the funniest to learn to love.

As for making the games way too easy, I'm not sure, I just remeber struggeling in older games but mostly because I was a child when I played them. I'm pretty sure you also could get a free cow in Animal Parade and in the tale of two towns but I could very well be wrong.

I'm not gonna lie, I never played Harvest Moon DS but that sounds hilarious, we need more of that back, and less Ned Flenders neighbors. That's another reason why I love SDV so much, Pam and Shane are so mean to the player at first (hell even Sebastian is kinda cold) but that's what makes them more compelling characters than the cast of PoOT, where frankly only the non-marriagable characters were interesting.

I think that's why I'm so obsessed with FoM right now, while yes the characters are so so nice, they're not boring and I don't even remember them by their niceness, Hayden is a super polite farmer, but I'd say his distinct traits are loud, open and so very passionate wbout farming, even his dialogue about being a good neighbor and lending you sugar is so much more memorable because he's so forward about it. I feel like most characters in this game can be described with a positive and a negative trait, which is what newer HM/SOS games lack, the balance between baby boy baby and bastard. And the dialogue in general is soooo good, I don't feel like I'm being talk down to, it feels like a normal conversation between adults, not between a child and their caretaker.

Laslty, thank god (NPC Studio) for the older characters, I feel like farming game fans are not in their teens (13-15) and more like in their twenties and up. We don't want to romace teens, we want something that doesn't feel illegal lol.

I totally agree anon, I love FoM so far and it has also made me super emotional playing this game. Ugh I can't wait for more content, I need to fall for this game harder.

[chuuyasfanboy]

Hi ! I Hope you’re doing well and I’m not bothering you too much with my random request, I’m here for a Genshin impact and bungo stray dogs romantic matchup with a male character

Sexuality : Straight

In my free time I enjoy reading, playing video games, listening to music, doing crochet, drawing, learning new languages, dancing and swimming.

Apparence : Long wavy/almost curly light brown hair and almond shaped brown eyes. I’m pretty tanned. 5’4,so I’m kinda short and normal weight though on the curvy side(I have a pear shaped body). My fashion sense is a mix of vintage clothes from the European 50s and kfashion.

So about my personality: I’m a Virgo, my mbti is intj, enneagram 5w6 I’m mostly withdrawn, individualistic, introverted and very honest even blunt at times. I need a lot of alone time.When im with people i’m close with, I tend to be more cheerful and energetic, I like to joke around too and tease people. One of the thing that stands out the most about me is that I’m extremely determined, ambitious and eager to learn new things. However, I do have some very specific subjects/ hobbies I tend to get hyper focused on.I’m also very observant and notices a lot of small details and I try my best to be attentive to my friends which makes me a good listener, especially for my friends who I value very much and try my best to be considerate with( for example by avoiding being too blunt).

I can be very anxious at times and I’m extremely cautious with people I don’t and sometimes do know, I have a hard time opening up and I’m an over thinker.

I have a hard time with small talk, the one where you talk just to be polite, although I don’t mind joking around with my friends and telling nonsense. I dislike noisy and crowded places, it stress me out.

I like funny/teasing and intelligent people who can give me a lot of personal space.

I suffer from insomnia and probably a bit of social anxiety too, my love language is physical touch and act of services.

Thank you very much and have a nice day !!!

Never a bother to get a request! I picked two fairly different characters for you just to keep them from being repetitive, but I hope you'll still like em!

For Genshin, I match you with...

Wanderer

Wanderer doesn't really tend to care about appearances. Or, physical ones. All he's looking for a partner is someone who's note entirely unsufferable, he does NOT have high standards. Though, he does find your fashion a little amusing. Those are two completely different styles and he thinks its hilarious watching you try to mix them in a comprehensive way. Just poke fun at his hat, he'll stop real quick.

He finds a specific interest in you learning new languages. A hobby? Really? Not something he considers a hobby, it took him a while to even understand the common slang in Sumeru let alone in nations he doesn't interract with much. Definitely asks you for tips every once in a while. He only goes to you and if you point it out he get's all defensive. He finds it really embarassing to have to rely on someone else, but if you don't point it out then…

Thankfully, Wanderer is pretty similar! He's introverted, and needs a lot of time alone to recharge his battery. That battery goes out QUICK too. Its a wonder how the two of you even met (probably Nahida's doing) because he practically ignores everybody. Most people are just really infuriating, especially when they're trying to make him like them. It's obvious, and annoying. When you got to the point you were comfortable enough to be cheerful around him, he almost did a double take. Because, really, he always figrued you were all sassy and cold. Then you just turn around and give him a bubbly smile and he's SO CONFUSED.

He wont ever rant to you, not on purpose. But with you paying so much attention to all his little trauma responses, it's hard for him not to be dragged out of his shell a bit. And oh boy, he has a lot to vent about. Mostly complaining about Ei, or Childe, or Sumeru, or this and that. He doesn't actually tell you a lot about his history, and certainly not about his time in the Fatui. Even with little hints, he's a mystery. It's frustraing, because he just wont open up to anybody, and is intent to never do so. He bottles up a lot, which leads to outbursts sometimes. Which, in turn triggers your overthinking, then triggers HIS overthinking and wow it's just a whole mess. Sometimes Nahida has to step in, because you two cannot function during arguments. Just a side effect of Wanderer, really.

You and Wanderer are both pretty similar when it comes to socialization. You both dislike small talk, and both hate crowded places. Thankfully, it means he doesn't find you annoying, not as much as everyone else. And he's more open to friendly teasing because of it, he knows you wont take offense. The two of you can stay in bed together at 3am and talk about whatever gossip he can think up. It's real sweet, he enjoys you a lot more than he lets on!

For BSD, I match you with...

Kunikida

Falling for you was a NIGHTMARE for Kunikida. I mean, you hardly met any of his 58 requirements. But I guess you cant stop your heart…

He really respects your fashion, finds it interesting. I definitely see him as the type to research random things, so he might actually dedicate a few free hours to reading up on your inspiration. It's bad, because he ends up knowing more about it then you do, which is- embarassing to say the least. Depending on what you want to put him in, you MIGHT be able to convince him to match with you. Maybe.

As long as you do hobbies only during free-time, he doesnt find any issues with them. Don't try to pull a sketchbook out a work, though. The furthest you'll get is passivey listening to music while doing paperwork. He's very serious about your responsibilities! He doesn't get free time a lot, but if he ever does, he doesn't mind spending it with you doing unscheduled home dates. It gives him a chance to finish up any last documents to sign and you'll get to spend time with him. Read out a book to him, he LOVES it.

He tends to akin you to a less annoying Dazai, especially when you're getting more energetic. Seeing as you don't go out of your way to ruin his day, though, he doesn't mind it. He's willing to indulge you as long as it fits within his schedule, just be mindful of any spontanious plans! He doesn't mind your bluntness, in fact, he actually appreciates it! Everybodys white lies in critiquing him makes it difficult to actually improve. If you're brutally honest, it's all the better for him. Though- he might start to take it personally, especially if it's something particularly important. Not that he'd ever change, buuuut it does bother him for a few hours and he'll busy himself to forget about it.

Kunikida doesn't mind your aversion to social outings, and is more than happy to take the conversation for the both of you. He does have a bad habit of planning things out to a T though, and if your social battery gets in the way he's just a TAD upset. He'll get over it, though!

Kunikida's not particularly funny or teasing, but he is fairly smart. Especially book wise. Now, he can't recite out the whole dictionary to you, but he can definitely help with spellchecking any essays or reports. He also doesn't mind beating up somebody for you if you may happen to ask. As long as it's deserved, he has a very short fuse with people who feel the need to insult you for any reason.