#also schools and units should care way more about this

[tomorrowusa]

Don't risk a rerun of the 2000 election.

In the first presidential election of the 21st century many deluded progressives voted for Green Party candidate Ralph Nader.

Their foolishness gave us eight years of George W. Bush who plagued the country with two recessions (including the Great Recession) and two wars (one totally unnecessary and one which could have been avoided if he heeded an intelligence brief 5 weeks before 9/11).

Oh yeah, Dubya also appointed one conservative and one batshit crazy reactionary to the US Supreme Court. Roberts and Alito are still there.

Paul Waldman of the Washington Post offers some thoughts.

Why leftists should work their hearts out for Biden in 2024

Ask a Democrat with a long memory what the numbers 97,488 and 537 represent, and their face will twist into a grimace. The first is the number of votes Ralph Nader received in Florida in 2000 as the nominee of the Green Party; the second is the margin by which George W. Bush was eventually certified the winner of the state, handing him the White House. Now, with President Biden gearing up for reelection, talk of a spoiler candidate from the left is again in the air. That’s unfortunate, because here’s the truth: The past 2½ years under Biden have been a triumph for progressivism, even if it’s not in most people’s interest to admit it. This was not what most people expected from Biden, who ran as a relative moderate in the 2020 Democratic primary. His nomination was a victory for pragmatism with its eyes directed toward the center. But today, no one can honestly deny that Biden is the most progressive president since at least Lyndon B. Johnson. His judicial appointments are more diverse than those of any of his predecessors. He has directed more resources to combating climate change than any other president. Notwithstanding the opposition from the Supreme Court, his administration has moved aggressively to forgive and restructure student loans.

Three years ago the economy was in horrible shape because of Trump's mishandling of the pandemic. Now unemployment is steadily below 4%, job creation continues to exceed expectations, and wages are rising as unions gain strength. The post-pandemic, post-Afghan War inflation rate has receded to near normal levels; people in the 1970s would have sold their souls for a 3.2% (and dropping) inflation rate. And many of the effects of "Bidenomics" have yet to kick in.

And in a story that is criminally underappreciated, his administration’s policy reaction to the covid-induced recession of 2020 was revolutionary in precisely the ways any good leftist should favor. It embraced massive government intervention to stave off the worst economic impacts, including handing millions of families monthly checks (by expanding the child tax credit), giving all kids in public schools free meals, boosting unemployment insurance and extending health coverage to millions.

It worked. While inflation rose (as it did worldwide), the economy’s recovery has been blisteringly fast. It took more than six years for employment rates to return to what they were before the Great Recession hit in 2008, but we surpassed January 2020 jobs levels by the spring of 2022 — and have kept adding jobs ever since. To the idealistic leftist, that might feel like both old news and a partial victory at best. What about everything supporters of Bernie Sanders have found so thrilling about the Vermont senator’s vision of the future, from universal health care to free college? It’s true Biden was never going to deliver that, but to be honest, neither would Sanders had he been elected president. And that brings me to the heart of how people on the left ought to think about Biden and his reelection.

Biden has gotten things done. The US economy is doing better than those of almost every other advanced industrialized country.

Our rivals China and Russia are both worse off than they were three years ago. And NATO is not just united, it's growing.

Sadly, we still need to deal with a far right MAGA cult at home who would wreck the country just to get its own way.

Biden may be elderly and unexciting, but that is one of the reasons he won in 2020. Many people just wanted an end to the daily drama of Trump's capricious and incompetent rule by tweet. And a good portion of those people live in places that count greatly in elections – suburbs and exurbs.

Superhero films seem to be slipping in popularity. Hopefully that's a sign that voters are less likely to embrace self-appointed political messiahs to save them from themselves.

Good governance is a steady process – not a collection of magic tricks. Experienced and competent individuals who are not too far removed from the lives of the people they represent are the best people to have in government.

Paul Waldman concludes his column speaking from the heart as a liberal...

I’ve been in and around politics for many years, and even among liberals, I’ve almost always been one of the most liberal people in the room. Yet only since Biden’s election have I realized that I will probably never see a president as liberal as I’d like. It’s not an easy idea to make peace with. But it suggests a different way of thinking about elections — as one necessary step in a long, difficult process. The further you are to the left, the more important Biden’s reelection ought to be to you. It might require emotional (and policy) compromise, but for now, it’s also the most important tool you have to achieve progressive ends.

Exactly. Rightwingers take the long view. It took them 49 years but they eventually got Roe v. Wade overturned. To succeed, we need to look upon politics as an extended marathon rather as one short sprint.

Republicans may currently be bickering, but they will most likely unite behind whichever anti-abortion extremist they nominate.

It's necessary to get the word out now that the only way to defeat climate-denying, abortion-restricting, assault weapon-loving, race-baiting, homophobic Republicans is to vote Democratic.

[little-pondhead]

So, for the Supervillain Danny and Everlast Trio Villains Au's....

What about Jazz?

Since I understand everyone's villain alter ego is based around their trauma and becoming their own antithesis and what not, I'd like to think that Jazz's alter ego would be a bad girl, kinda like Ember and Kitty (the former who mind controlled her twice and the latter who almost took her place while slowly corrupting her), maybe with a hint of Spectra (the school councilor thing, the hospital thing, and that one time with all three of them).

Instead of being the nice, normal girl who tries to be perfect, she's a loose cannon who does all the wild teen stuff, doesn't care about anyone accept for those who are in her 'gang', and will absolutely resort to violence the first chance she gets. Maybe she also has some kind of mind control powers, given how these incidents relate to her being under someone else's control.

Maybe she doesn't come around as often, because she has college and the like, but once she does, things get messy as she takes the chance to let out all her school related stress.

you have read my m i n d

Jazz had almost no childhood since she helped raise Danny from a very young age. She's intelligent and respectful and really wants to be an excellent example for Danny, so she acts as such. Therefore, Jazz never got to go through her 'teenage rebellion' phase. She wears modest clothes and upholds a pretty solid moral code. So here I present Nightingale, the punk-rock social justice warrior who comes and goes like a hurricane. She takes on the name Nightingale to avoid confusion, but once the JL realizes she and Fenton are related, some of the members consider going on a very long vacation to another world so they don't have to deal with this shit.

Now for her powerset, I'm not entirely sure if she should play meta or not. It's a common trope in fics that Jazz has been ecto-contaminated from her parent's experiments, thus giving her some sort of body enhancement. I played on that to give her a set of ears and teeth that match Danny's. She may not have ghost powers, but if she's fighting alongside Team Phantom, she must have some freaky abilities, right? (I love the mind control idea, btw) I feel like Jazz would be the Exception, where she's obviously enhanced in some way, but it's not an obvious power she can consciously separate herself from. It's like trying to tell your body to stop using your eyes. Unless other outside forces are preventing it, Jazz can't really not use her enhanced strength or speed. It drives the JL nuts because either Nightingale is a very weak meta or just an Olympic-level teenage athlete, and no one will spill the beans.

Also, this is personal preference, honestly, but I think it'd be really fucking funny if the DC universe is where Jazz and Danny have all their sibling fights. At home, they have to put up a united front so their parents don't get suspicious and the house doesn't kill them. (Also so none of the rogues takes advantage of their anger at each other) But they're siblings. Even if Jazz and Danny are the best of friends, they have to have arguments over the stupidest stuff. That's practically rule number one of having a sibling. So they go there to blow off steam and duke it out like they've always wanted to. It's mostly to release tension and stress, but each fight is getting more and more elaborate, and this whole thing is ridiculous. None of the heroes get paid enough for this. They're just gonna sit back and watch the show.

[mistypsych]

ANATOMY OF A CRIMINAL - CHAPTER 1

/ yoongi / suga / agust d /

summary: as a doctor you never expected to be dragged into “the criminal life”, nothing and no one seems to be true anymore, your whole world turns upside down after you save him.

pairings: yoongi mob boss x f.reader x non idol bts members.

warnings: smut, guns, knives, stabbings, blood, gore, murders, drugs, criminals, gang life, medical emergency, illness, abuse, swearing, angst, dubcon, gang violence, corruption, manipulation, lies, cheating - 18+ minors dni.

Note: Hi! This is an attempt of writing a fanfic long after writing anything at all. Please also keep in mind English is no longer my first language and it might be a bit rusty and odd at times but I try my best. The story is a non idol BTS fanfic with Suga being the main character. The first chapter or so there might not be a lot of Yoongi but I want the backstory to be clear. The next chapters there will be way more of him I promise! If you want to be on the tag list let me know!

You slowly stepped into the on-call room, sighing while rubbing your aching nape. The painful muscle tension was starting to turn into a headache. You sat down on the big couch and leaned your head back, instantly feeling your body loosen and sink into the soft cushions. Today was a rough day for the ER unit. The hospital was dealing with multiple trauma victims due to a horrendous bus collision. Some patients were barely banged up others unfortunately were looking like they might not make it threw the night. You were already dreading the moment you would have to talk with their family members in case the worse was to come.

The weight of the hour-less intense work and surgeries was starting to rub off on your whole body. As you were almost about to doze off, the doors slammed wide open. “What a fucking trip…” Jungkook stopped mid sentence when he saw you glare at him from under your hooded eyelids. “How many energy drinks did your pour into yourself Kook?” you said in a bit agitated tone. You were tired and running on fumes. He seemed way less strained.

The on-call room was called so for a reason. It was supposed to be a safe heaven for peace and rest. It seemed as tho people like your long time friend let those facts slip their mind. “Sorry Y/N. I did not think you were about to sleep… You looked on fire there!” scoffing a bit under your breath you mumbled “Sometimes I really doubt your capability to think at all… and yes I was lit because I had to at the moment plus I had tons of adrenaline pumping in my system. Now it’s all wearing off”. Running his tattooed hand threw the thick and shiny locks of hair he sighed in defeat. He knew your were right. At times he was way to energetic and high maintenance.

“Still good for tomorrow?” he changed the subject not wanting to get into a war of back and forth bantering. Nodding your head you hummed in agreement.

Both of you usually made plans on your days off to go out and give medical attention to those who were less fortunate. You took care of the homeless, drug addicts and poor elders that were embarrassed to seek help at the official medical institutions. Many times it was also the lack of insurance that could get very high. The two of you saw it as charity and giving back to society.

You met Jungkook at med school in the USA. He was a scholarship student that worked his way into getting the opportunity to study overseas. You were the only person at your year that was able to speak Korean due to the fact you went to Seoul during part of your high school years. So of course you were more than happy to help Kook who at times struggled with the more difficult English terms during the lectures.

Over the years you two grew close and he was the one to say you should once again go to Seoul and take up your internship there. Being an adventurous young woman the mere thought of it seemed a great idea. So here you were years later already after your internship with a secured position as one of the junior trauma surgeons and planning charity work with your friend. You already scheduled some “appointments” with your long term patients.

To be honest you preferred this type of work more than the big shot tasks at the hospital. For you medicine should focus more on helping people. The world showed you many times that if you were less fortunate or simply made some bigger mistakes in life, the cruel reality was that usually there was no way to afford medical attention and insurance. Sometimes it was also the cost of meds themselves. Those could be unbelievably high, especially when it came to rare or terminal illnesses.

You and Kookie worked with official charities that did their best to find funds for some crucial medication for the poor. Not once did you also end up saving lives of some addicts that overdosed. Usually people just let them lay on the streets and did not care to help. You could not blame them tho. The less nice areas of the city were also full of con artists and people simply did not want to risk their own lives. At times it was also the mentality of “they did it to themselves, now they need to bear the consequences”.

You were not there to judge. How could any of you know what these people went threw in life? What pushed them to “self medicate”. So you kept focused solemnly on helping those who seemed like they needed it.

You closed your eyes again trying to ignore the fact that Jungkook was rustling around with some food wrapping. “If I am to survive the last two hours of this hell shift and be of any use tomorrow I would greatly appreciate you stop making a ruckus and let me rest!” you huffed angrily, not even bothering to open your eyes. Once the room was filled with silence, a content smirk spread over your lips. At last the well deserved quiet. Sweet darkness of dreamland slowly took over your mind.

*** *** ***

Getting to your apartment after ending a difficult day at the hospital always filled you with relief. It was close to 8 p.m. Not having to work the night shift this time and having the day off tomorrow made you really happy. As you walked deeper into the hallway your nostrils got hit with a mouthwatering smell of delicious food cooking, it instantly made a smile spread on your lips. The sizzling sound coming from the kitchen meant that your fiancé was already off work as well.

He was one of the best criminal detectives in the city. You both worked hard and sometimes very long hours, but you somehow managed to keep your relationship flourishing threw all the years. Walking towards the sweet and sour smell, you saw his slim frame hovering over some pans and stirring their content. His wide slim shoulders moving under a simple black t-shirt. They matched so well with his thin waist shaping his figure into a perfect triangle.

Resting against the door frame you stared at him in awe. “Are you gonna keep looking or do you plan on saying hello?” he said in a joking tone and turned to you with a big grin that reached to his eyes. You always wondered how he could keep such a sunshine attitude while working a job full of murders, death and gore.

Pushing your back off the frame you walked to him humming and wrapping your arms around him. You rested your chin on his shoulder, breathing in his fresh scent. “Hoba… you are too good to me…” you murmured and kissed him behind the ear. The fact that after a surely long day of work for him, he was there making you both a nice late dinner made your heart squeeze.

You really appreciated having him in you life and that somehow you both were deeply involved despite having hectic and difficult careers. The saying - where there is will there is a way - always made you think of your relationship with Hoseok.

After finishing dinner and basically licking your plate clean, you turned to Hobi with a smile “I’ll take care of the dishes” you said taking the plates from the table and making your way to the kitchen. As you were about to dry off the last glass you felt slender fingers creep up your back. You turned your face a bit a small smirk twisting the side of your lips.

“I was thinking of desert…” Hoseok said in a deep voice staring straight into your eyes. “Oh yea? You want me to run down to the store and grab something?” you teased, being well aware that was not what he had in mind. The twinkling of your eyes giving away how much you were enjoying this. But your fiancé was not the type to put up with games for too long so his only response was rolling his eyes, grabbing you and lifting you up. Wrapping your legs around his waist you kissed him desperately.

Lately both of you were so busy with work, you barely had the time or strength for even watching a movie together, so you excitedly welcomed the attention he was giving you. Not bothering to make it to the bedroom you ended on his lap on the couch. Your kisses were getting wild and messy. Just as you started to grind against his growing member, your breaths getting fast and uneven, you heard the loud ring of your phone.

If it were any other signal you would chose to ignore it completely, but the ring tone suggested is was Jungkook from his “special” number in case of an emergency. “Foooor fucks sake!” you growled trying to wait out the call, still kissing and moving your hips over your fiancé. If it was just a couple rings you could try and tell yourself your friend was piss ass drunk messing around.

Much to your dismay the phone kept on buzzing “I need to take this…” you said sadly looking at Hobi who was trying to even out his excited heartbeat. “It’s ok babe” he said, he knew he could not be angry about it, usually it was him being called into some crime scene. You walked away to answer the call “You better be almost dead or something close to that to have a reason for calling me at this hour!” you hissed into the speaker.

“Y/N! This is serious. A guy needs help… he can’t get into the hospital and the wounds are beyond my expertise. I am downstairs waiting for you. I really need your fucking help. I will explain everything later” his voice was shaky and full of what seemed like fear, so you stopped your ranting right away.

You quickly ran to grab your coat “I am coming down!” closing the door on your way out you told Hoseok you might have a very late night and maybe he should not wait up for you. Taking quick strides down the stairs of your apartment building you once again were thanking the universe for the most understanding man to have chosen to exist in your life.

*** *** ***

You quickly got into Kooks car throwing your medical bag onto the back seat. “I brought all my suturing stuff in case it was really that bad…” you said under your breath still a bit irked at the fact you were driving somewhere instead of getting frisky with your lover. “You will need it. Trust me…” is all your friend said.

Turing to finally look at him you saw he was pale, his hair was messy and his forehead was beaded with sweat. He was clutching the stirring wheel to the point his knuckles were white. You never saw him so nervous, not even at the hospitals ER unit.

Driving in silence for some time you finally snapped out of your trail of thoughts and realized you made it into the shady outskirts of Seoul. Even when working on your charity missions you both never made it into the really dangerous corners of the city, so you were very surprised and felt a shiver run threw your body.

You let your questioning gaze fall to Kookie, you were about to blurt out a “what the fuck man?” but before you could, he was out of the car grabbing your bag and walking to your side. Seeing your face full of questions, he opened the car door for you looking at you seriously “It’s fine… we are fine… we need to go there” he pointed towards a dark building that looked like a hangar.

Your body involuntarily shook at the sight. You immediately thought of all the crime scenes and stories Hobi shared with you from time to time when you asked him about work. But instead of listening to your panicking mind, you decided that surely Jungkook had to know what was going on and since he said it was fine it had to be, right?

You cautiously walked behind him letting him carry your bag. Usually you would always rip it out just to show what a strong and independent woman you were. Once you walked into the building you could hear the soles of your shoes clank on the hard floor. It all started to feel like some thriller movie, the type with a bad ending. The beating of your heart was so loud you could swear Kook had to hear it. The adrenalin was rushing in your system and you were starting to feel in flight mode.

Before you could panic more, an unknown voice broke you out of the cycle “Fucking bout’ time!” a tall and strong built guy growled at your friend and then eyed you top to bottom. “This is that great surgeon? She is supposed to be better than you?” he scoffed, a look of disbelief forming on his face. “For your information I am fucking better at surgical work than most!” you snapped. You were freaked out and now some dude that looked like a typical thug was trying to insult you.

“You better not be just running your mouth hun” he smirked grabbing you by the wrist and pulling you to the next room. He basically shoved you inside and tossed your bag at you. You didn’t even know when he managed to take it from Kook. The sight in front of you was gruesome. A young male about your age was laying on some banged up table. Blood was oozing out of his stomach. His pitch black long hair was sticky, his skin pale as a sheet of paper.

“Bloody hell…” you whispered walking up to the man. You turned to look at your colleague giving him the “what do you expect me to do?! make a fucking miracle happen?!” stare. You bent over the man and checked for a pulse. To your surprise he was still alive.

Looking at his slashed abdomen you thought to yourself there is now way you can do anything in these conditions. Even if by some chance you were to manage to stitch him up, the place was far from sterile, so he would die of sepsis anyway. “He needs a fucking hospital!” you say and take your phone out to call up an ambulance.

Suddenly your cell got knocked out of your hands and fell to the floor with a loud thud. Just as your were about to scream your head off, you saw it, the end of a gun pointing straight at your forehead. “No hospitals” the tall male snarled. Now you were sure, you got into some gang business and this was not gonna go the way you want.

tag list: @wobblewobble822

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

I realise you're HE, but any thoughts on how high school level education should be run/changed/etc? I'd love to know your views!

Oh sure, plenty, but they're not particularly informed lol

Well; Wales is actually massively and fundamentally changing secondary education atm, but we won't be getting students from it until the year after next, I think, so no real comment on effectiveness yet - but it's very interesting. They're getting rid of isolated subjects in favour of broad umbrella areas, as I understand it? So there's now Science and Technology (Physics, Biology, Chemistry, Computing, and all the various DT subjects like Woodwork, Electronics, Cookery, etc), Maths and Numeracy, Humanities (History, Geography, Ethics, Religion), Languages Literacy and Communication, and Health and Wellbeing (actually maybe Cookery comes under this one now? Dunno.) And there's a sixth to do with arts but I can't remember what it's called. But it includes Art, Drama, Media Studies, etc.

And then the idea is that a class will learn about a given topic at a time (I don't know for how long, so let's say six weeks), and this will be taught in each of those six umbrellas but via their own methods. So like... I dunno, let's say the Tudors:

That's fairly straightforward for Humanities, but in addition to giving you the historical facts you'd also explore historic trade routes and natural resources of the time and how they related to the politics (geography), the religious make up of the country and how THAT related to the politics (religion), etc.

Maths and Numeracy might explore how to use statistics to analyse Tudor era population or trade data.

Science and Tech could look at disease outbreaks and virology, or technological advancements and how they worked and get students to build one, or get students to construct a Tudor-era town using computer software

Languages can study plays from the era (Shakespeare), look at linguistic development, or use historical events as talking points to practice using vocab in conversations

Health and Wellbeing can explore stressors and challenges of the average Medieval peasant and how they overcame them, or play some popular Tudor sport or game, or make food to Tudor recipes, etc

The Arts one (god I cannot remember the name) can look at art history of the period, fashions, perform plays, etc

So everyone is still teaching the skills and knowledge of their subject areas, they're just united by one big case study. It apparently allows for far more integrated teaching, too, where two previously discrete subjects can join forces on a project.

All of which seems pretty good, on the whole, but also rife with issues if everyone isn't careful, so we'll see how it shakes out over the next few years.

From my own experiences of school though. Jesus. Something definitely needed to happen, fuck me.

What I should have learned in Textiles:

How to use a sewing machine

How to sew by hand to mend a tear

How to darn a hole

How to hem, dart, take in, and let out clothes

How to sew from a pattern

What I actually learned in Textiles:

How to use a sewing machine on its most basic setting

How to phone in creating a hand puppet out of felt because gluing was easier than sewing

How to badly sew an extremely makeshift and shit bag out of scrap fabric that you in no way want to then use

How to lose all interest in Textiles because it was useless and uninteresting

Like that is a VITAL skillset-imparting subject, and they fucked it, lads, they completely fucked it. Why did they never set us the task of buying a cheap shirt from a charity shop that we then amended in class? That would have been so useful.

Games and PE! Fucking hell! Here's what I should have learned:

How to stretch my body safely to target specific muscle groups, and in particular, how to cultivate a daily stretching routine I enjoyed and wanted to do

How to find a physical activity active enough to get me out of breath that I genuinely enjoyed, so that I wanted to continue it, e.g. salsa dancing or rope climbing or ice skating or hill climbing or assault courses or fucking anything at all

How to build my body up to doing particular activities safely and sustainably

How to find a physical activity to do on wet, cold, rainy days that would still be fun and I would still enjoy

Here's what I actually learned:

Physical activity is always uncomfortable and miserable and sometimes even painful

If you aren't enjoying running around in the wind and rain instead of the indoor gym The Problem Is You. Start Enjoying It.

Wanting to stay warm and dry and comfortable is a punishable choice.

You are only permitted to do physical activity in clothes that make you feel profoundly exposed and uncomfortable (a gym skirt and gym knickers in my school. Cycling shorts got you detention. Don't get me started on jogging bottoms.) Again, if you do not enjoy this, The Problem Is You. Start Enjoying It.

There are only three activity options. If you don't enjoy any of them, physical activity is not for you.

You should be able to Just Do physical exercise, without any training to build you up to it. If you can't and it hurts, this is because you're Bad At PE.

You will only be shown Once

Physical activity is only ever a team sport that you aren't good enough to be willingly picked for

LIKE WHAT THE FUCK

And you know what, LET'S round off with Food Technology/Cookery. Because I remember the things I was asked to make in FT. As a little baby Year 7, I still vividly remember two of the things we made.

Angel Delight. Easy, you might say! A simple treat, you might think! Easing the children into food prep, I hear you cry! But no, because the theme of the year was healthy eating, and so we were to add fruit to our Angel Delight. Any flavour Angel Delight, any fruit. Off you go. I don't know if any of you have encountered fruit, Tumblrs, but it famously has faintly acidic juice. This will prevent the Angel Delight from setting within the one hour lesson, no matter how well you mixed the pudding, or how quickly you got it into the fridge. It will result in soggy gross lumps of oxidising fruit in sloppy liquid pudding. Lesson learned: fruit makes food worse.

Cake. Easyish, you might say! A little harder than the Angel Delight but good training, you might think! A fairly straightforward process with a child-friendly food at the end, I hear you cry! But no, because the theme of the year was still healthy eating, so the teachers made it into an experiment; make four small cakes. One with sugar, one with sweetener, one with apple, and one with carrot. Then taste them and rank them in order. Off you go. I don't know if any of you have ever tried eating sugarless carrot cake, Tumblrs, but I have, and I can tell you categorically that it really puts the "Did you know" into the phrase "Did you know that fructose and sucrose are not actually equivalents of each other in a culinary setting?" It was rancid. It was disgusting. It was vile. It made me hate carrot cake for the next 12 years, in case my mouth had to go through that ordeal again. I'm still highly suspicious of the stuff even now. To (I assume) the surprise of fuck-damned no one, we unanimously put them in the order of sugar, sweetener, apple, carrot. Lesson learned: FRUIT MAKES FOOD WORSE AND CARROTS ARE ACTIVELY DISGUSTING

What possessed them?! No idea. Fucking hell.

Anyway this is getting long and I am still ill-informed. Peace out.

[sourlove]

My In-Laws ~ Part II of 'My Mistake' YANDERE TODOROKI SHOTO

TW: OBSESSION, DELUSION, MENTIONED ARSON, IMPLIED VIOLENCE, MENTIONS OF MAFIA AND GANG ACTIVITIES

A/N: This is a quirkless AU so the Todoroki family isn't as fucked up. Touya never left but Enji is still lowkey an asshole. Also sorry this took a while, haven't been feeling very well.

READ PART 1 HERE

You should have gone to law school like your mom wanted you to. You had such a bright future. Now here you were, dressed to the nines, heading to an event you had no business being at, with a man who was convinced the both of you were madly in love.

Some people would consider it a win, especially with how powerful and wealthy the Todoroki name was. However, the circumstances that had led to your situation were less than ideal.

"I'm so glad you decided to match with me, my love," Shoto said, sending a small smile your way.

"You burned all my other clothes," you responded dryly, swatting his hand from your thigh.

The asshole pretended like he didn't even hear you. "It's good for us to present a united front against my family. This might come as a surprise but we aren't exactly a regular family."

You glanced out of the blacked out windows of the chauffer driven car you were in to the convoy that followed in front and behind, filled with armed guards. "You don't say."

Shoto sighed morosely. "It's shocking, I know. I must warn you that some of my family aren't very, how would you say, mentally stable."

"...is that so?" you asked the man who decided he was in love with you as he was tied up in your basement. Honestly, the whole thing was starting to sound like some big, elaborate prank he was pulling. But no, Shoto began his spiel, completely oblivious to your sarcasm.

"Take my eldest brother for example," he began. "We aren't supposed to talk about him, actually. It's...really been very difficult for my family..."

"Oh...did something happen to him?" You asked, feeling kind of bad.

"Hmm? No, we just can't reveal too much information so it won't be used against him in court." Shoto gave you a blank look. "He burnt down a school district. It's been really hard for my family to keep him out of prison so he's on house arrest now."

...of course he was.

The rest of the drive was filled with stories of Shoto's siblings and mother. You weren't sure if you wanted to meet actually them or if you wanted to throw yourself out of the car, but before you could make a decision, the car arrived in front of a large compound. You gaped in awe as the gates swung open to reveal a mansion and grounds even grander than Shoto's.

There was a butler who welcomed you to the mansion, while his eyes tried to communicate with you to run. Now that was a tempting idea. But there was no backing out now. Plus, Shoto had gotten used to your escape attempts and his hand was like a shackle on your wrist. You gazed around the interior of the mansion, your hands itching to pinch some of the smaller but still expensive looking art pieces.

"You're here!" A cheery voice made you turn towards the large grandiose staircase where a beautiful woman stood. She had long white hair, tipped with red, similar to Shoto's half. Must be Fuyumi then, the only 'normal' one in the family according to Shoto.

You smile thinly as she wraps you in a hug. "It's so to finally meet you!" she exclaimed. "Everyone is in the dining room already!"

Shoto snatched you back into his arms before Fuyumi could drag you away but she just chuckled and rolled her eyes at you. "Shoto was always so possessive with his things."

Things? Your smile grew a bit more strained but neither of them seemed to notice or care. The dining room was just as opulent as the rest of the house but you barely got to appreciate it, instead, all you took notice of was the mix of bright blue and grey eyes staring at you.

"This is Y/N. Don't be weird," Shoto introduced, oh so eloquently. The heads of the table were occupied by a giant red haired man and a tiny woman with silver hair flowing down her back. Two young men sat opposite each other and Fuyumi slipped into a chair, patting the seat next to her for you. Shoto ignored her and pulled you to sit next to him.

You nodded at them awkwardly. "Hello. Nice to meet you."

"You're kind of hot." A redhead with an ankle monitor and a disturbingly predatory grin piped up. "Like in a trapped mouse kind of way. I like it."

"Hush, Touya," the older woman said sternly. "He didn't mean that, dear."

"Nah, he has a point." The other young man, Natsuo probably, smiled at you, looking at you slowly from top to bottom. "There's something appealing there."

"I said don't be weird. Keep it in your fucking pants." Shoto glared at the both of them and if it were anyone else, you might have felt worried for them, however, the atmosphere in the room never changed.

"That's enough, all of you." The large man said gruffly. He must be Enji, the generally disliked patriarch. "Y/N, was it? Welcome."

"I'm sure Shoto has told you all about us. But we barely know anything about you, my dear," Rei said kindly. "How did you and our Shoto meet?"

"Oh, um-" You glanced around the room, wide eyed, only to be met with curious gazes from the family. Panicked, you shrank back into your seat. "We- uh, we met by chance, you know, it was like sooo romantic, haha. It was a park-yeah...".

Touya rolled his eyes and Natsuo scoffed into his wine glass. Enji silently raised an eyebrow. "Well, that sounds...nice," Fuyumi laughed awkwardly. "Very romantic..."

Shoto cleared his throat. "Y/N tried to kidnap me the first time that we met."

It was as if the tension just bled out of the room. Rei gasped in delight and smiled at Enji. "Oh, it reminds me of how me met! You remember when I tried to kill you?" He gave his wife a small, fond smile and nodded.

"Oh now, I'm definitely interested," Touya purred. "Looks like we have a little psychopath on out hands."

"You'll fit right in then, pretty," Natsuo added with a laugh. "We're all some kind of fucked up."

"I knew it!" Fuyumi exclaimed, eyes sparkling. "The moment I saw you, I knew you were special!"

Shoto leaned in, whispering, "I think they like you. Not sure if that's a good or bad thing."

Oh you knew what it was. As excited chatter from the Todoroki family began to fill the room, you knew that you had just gotten yourself entangled with one of the most dangerous groups of people in the world.

And that was a very bad thing indeed.

A/N: If you enjoyed this, please leave a like, comment and reblog! I need to sleep and get my shit together lol so this might not be my best work. Thanks for your support either way!

@sky2lar @justabratsworld

[horanghaejamjam]

Vampire Kisses - {WJH}

↪   Summary: He is the head of the Wen family, the highest ranking family of vampires in the country. You are a mere human sold to them for the purpose of being his mate and bride. Jun is determined to win your heart before you wed, and perhaps a few playful kisses are the key to doing that.

↪   Pairings:  Vampire lord Jun x Human female reader

↪   Rating: M 18+

↪   Genre: Vampire Au / Slight rivals to lovers / Smut / Fluff 

↪   Word Count: 16.3k

↪ Warnings/Contents: Smut, Blood and blood drinking, Biting, Jun being super flirty and teasing, Arranged marriage, Virgin!reader,  Unprotected sex, Body Worship, Oral (male receiving),  Praise, Soft bondage (Jun ties/blindfolds reader with silk), Fingering, Talks about impregnation. Mostly just very fluffy and soft with Jun being whipped for reader. 

↪ Side Notes: My first post of 2023! This also turned out way longer than I was expecting so I guess I got carried away lol. A few of the other svt members also make cameos in this story. It is implied that reader is younger than Jun.

↪ Huge thank you to the lovely @xiubaek-13​ for betaing and editing this fic for me!

↪ Click here to see my other Seventeen stories

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↪ Click here to join my fic taglist

Growing up, your mom always told you stories about marriage and weddings. How a woman's wedding was supposed to be the happiest day of her life, a once in a lifetime moment. Ever since the first story, you dreamed about the day you would get that moment, planning your dream wedding down to the very last detail. As a child, you imagined a royal ceremony in a grand castle, wearing the most beautiful and lavish dress you could ever imagine. Your husband would be royalty for sure, a man who would love and cherish you for as long as you both shall live. You would be happy together, have the perfect family, and live beautifully in your life of luxury. Looking back at those memories, you realized that you should have been careful about what you wished for. You were getting that wedding you always wanted, but it would not be under your terms. The other thing you learned young was that the world you lived in was not simple, in fact one may consider it the merging of two separate worlds. Two dominant races ran this world and fought for power, similar enough to coexist but different enough to segregate them to keep the world in balance. 

For centuries, humans were the dominant race on Earth. The knowledge of others existed, but their numbers were far too small to be considered a challenge, so humans called the shots. Then, overtime, vampires became a much more prominent presence, easily taking over and claiming areas for themselves. Regions quickly became divided as vampires took control of certain areas, forcing humans to either fight back or surrender to the change. This caused a conflict for many years until leaders on both sides met and finally came to an agreement. They would coexist and operate together, with humans during the day and vampires at night. The agreement was sealed with a marriage of the royal families that united both sides. From that moment forward, it had become customary for the most powerful vampire families to marry one of their kin to a human as a way to honor the unity. The marriage would be sealed by the vampire claiming their spouse by taking their blood on their wedding day, and from there the human could choose if they wished to stay that way or transition to a vampire by drinking the blood of their mate. 

You were born a human, raised in a lower class family who often struggled to make ends meet. You were an only child, and your parents did the best they could to make sure you had everything you needed growing up. You did your best in school and worked a part time job at a local bakery. Overall, you felt that you were pretty average but nothing special, especially not someone that any royal family would set their eyes on. Hell, you never even recalled meeting a vampire so you couldn’t imagine you would catch one's attention, but somehow you did. 

Your whole world changed on the night of your 23rd birthday, being awoken to a knock at your door. Standing there, dressed in a black and red suit with a devilish smile, was one of the most ethereal beings you had ever laid your eyes on. He was tall, with piercing eyes and an almost dark aura to him, his fangs undeniably poking out against his lip as he smiled. You didn’t know what you expected vampires to look like, but it certainly was not this. He bowed and introduced himself as Mingyu, the head servant of the Wen family. He then explained that they had been observing you for quite some time and wanted to ask for your hand in marriage to their eldest son. You had been too stunned to speak, staring at Mingyu as if he had two heads while your parents argued against the idea. You had wanted to refuse also, not wanting to marry someone you had never met, let alone a vampire. However, they had promised protection and financial stability for you and your family as long as you stayed mated to him and provided an eventual heir to the bloodline. As much as you hated the idea, you knew deep down that it was what was best for your family, and so you said yes and prepared to move into the Wen family estate, where you now resided. 

You had been living here for a few years now and never found adjusting any easier. Your wedding to Wen Junhui was set to take place within the next month, falling on the first full moon after your birthday. You didn’t quite understand how everything worked but you remember Mingyu explaining to you that this would be the time where the energy was highest and you were both at your prime. There was a chance for mating bonds to go wrong so this was the best chance of eliminating that risk. You had tried to ask what happened when it went wrong but all Mingyu did was pat your head and tell you not to worry about it. 

That time had been spent allowing you to learn about the family and adjust to what your new life would be. Mr. and Mrs. Wen had met you almost immediately upon your arrival, giving you a once over before welcoming you with open arms. You learned a lot about the family, and about vampires in general from them, helping you to adjust more to your new life. Mr. Wen was born into the family and had been around for many hundred, if not almost a thousand years despite the fact that he didn’t even look 50. Mrs. Wen had been a human when she married into the family, making the decision to transition and stay with her husband when she was in her late 20s. Though she had also explained that she had only been turned after her 30th birthday so she was, technically, significantly younger than her husband. This made you question how age worked with vampires, especially the aging. All you were told was the brief explanation that aging was slower and it took many years for them to age the way a human would in one or two. There was also something about blood slowing down the process but you decided to tune that part out for your own sanity. 

You were also informed about the family line, and how the head of the family would change every couple hundred years to keep up with the changing times, though the original head will often stick around for a while before moving on. The family had two known sons, with Jun being the oldest and only bred vampire which gave him the title by birth right. In human years, he would have just turned 26 making him a few years your senior, when in reality he was slowly nearing 300 years old which was the prime age for a vampire, if not still a bit young. He also had a younger brother, Minghao, who was a transitioned vampire. The human born son of one of the servants that Mr. Wen took in and claimed as his own child. The two brothers, despite not being blood related, were very close and did almost everything together. They had been traveling together at that time, so you hadn’t been able to meet either until a while later. 

It had been during dinner (or breakfast for the family), when the two brothers finally returned. Polar opposites in style and personality, but both striking in their own way. Minghao was more delicate but striking in his features, jet black hair falling over his face in messy locks and dressed in an all black trench coat that hid most of his frame. He did not speak much around you, but when he did his voice was soft and his words were sharp and to the point, he had almost reminded you of one of your highschool professors. He acknowledged you briefly with a calm smile before excusing himself to his study, leaving you to finally turn and acknowledge your soon to be husband. 

You would have been lying if you said Junhui wasn’t one of the most gorgeous men you’d ever seen. Immediately you could tell he was taller and had a larger build than his younger brother. His gaze was softer but still had an alluring touch to it, almost as if he looked bored. His hair was longer, practically touching his shoulders with a striking blonde color. Most of it was slicked back but a few strands fell in front of his eyes. He had been wearing a slick black button down with the top three buttons undone, tucked into fitted pants that suited him nicely. You were immediately attracted to, if not very intimidated by the man standing in front of you, even when he gave you a gentle smile and sat beside you. “Y/N,” he had muttered softly, taking your hand and kissing it, “I am so happy to finally meet you.” His voice was soft, and even a bit higher pitched than you had been expecting, and he seemed more than eager to get to know you. 

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From that moment forward, it seemed like Junhui, or Jun as he preferred you to call him, would not leave you alone. He was always following you around, attempting to talk to you or get you to acknowledge him. Whether it be genuine questions, teasing you over the smallest things, or even flirty advances, it seemed that no matter where you went Jun was there. You gave into him occasionally, but for the most part you found his presence to be quite annoying. Yeah you knew you were being forced to marry him but you hadn’t expected him to be all over you the second you met him. You figured, or more like hoped, that the two of you would stay acquaintances at most and just keep the formalities when his family was around, but it seemed like Jun had different ideas. 

You tried your best to tolerate him, but as your wedding drew closer you found the whole thing weighing on you more and more. The situation became too real for your liking and suddenly you were questioning if this was really a good idea. You were marrying a complete stranger, someone who was infatuated with you but you wanted nothing to do with. You were expected to spend your life with this man and eventually have children with him and you didn’t know him, let alone love him. The thought alone made your skin crawl, trying to suppress the thoughts of what would happen on your wedding night, all for the family to stay in power. Unfortunately there was no way for you to change your mind, knowing that your family would suffer if you tried to back out was the only thing keeping you from running away. Instead you developed a new routine, sleeping through the night while they were up and taking advantage of the daytime to sneak out and enjoy the last few days of your freedom. Today was no exception, with you waking up early and pacing around your room, waiting for the day to arrive so you could sneak out and meet up with your friends. 

Looking out the window, you saw the sun slowly starting to peak out over the horizon, just enough to paint the sky with a purple hue. Within the next hour or so it would be light out and, if your calculations were correct, the family would be asleep by then. Mr and Mrs Wen specifically were likely already in bed by now, the older vampires having no desire to wait for the sun. They were much more sensitive to the light as you had learned, keeping their curtains drawn hours before the sun even thought of rising. They were easy to sneak around, often following the same schedule so you knew where they would be at what time. Minghao was a bit trickier, the man not following a set schedule and often staying up way past when his peers had gone to bed. However, you also learned that he was a bit of a recluse, preferring to stay in his room or study whenever possible. Even when he did catch you, he seemed to either understand your feelings or not care enough to stop you, simply giving you a nod and a knowing look as you made your way out the door. You made a mental note to thank him one of these days for not stopping you or ratting you out to his parents. 

Jun, on the other hand, was not as easy as his family. You weren’t sure if he liked the thrill of being up when it was day or he just didn’t trust you but he would be up for hours before finally resting. Sometimes you found him in his study working on who knows what and other times you had run into him chatting with one of the servants in the kitchen as if that was a normal occurrence for him. Well, technically it was, but that didn’t mean you liked it any more. Day time was the only time you ever had to yourself, enjoying the quiet and freedom before you would be forced to adapt to the nightlife. Though it seemed your soon to be husband didn’t like the idea of leaving you alone, always knowing where you were and sneaking up on you like the two of you were playing a twisted game of hide and seek.

“Enjoying the view Sweetheart?” speak of the devil, you nearly jumped out of your skin when you heard his voice behind you. You hadn’t even heard him enter your room so you had no idea how long he had been there. Jun chuckled at your obvious shock as he walked up behind you, reaching out to close the curtain before the rays of the sun could peak out and threaten him. Glancing at him over your shoulder, you saw that he had ditched his usual suit and jewels for his pajamas, a simple white shirt and baggy pants, giving you hope that this visit would be short.

“I thought you would be in bed,” you muttered as you turned to face him fully.

“Without saying goodnight?” he questioned, “I would never! You should know that by now.” He hummed in thought for a moment as he glanced down at you, bottom lip finding its way between his teeth, “Though judging by the way you’re dressed I’m assuming you’re staying up again. I don’t understand why though, it’s so lonely when everyone's asleep isn’t it?”

“I like being alone, and I’m not ready to give up my life just yet for the sake of your family,” you argued, making the male wince as if your words burned him.

“You really don’t like me do you?” he asked, or more like whined which made you roll your eyes. Surely the fact that an all powerful vampire such as himself was pouting at you like a kicked puppy was pitiful. Still, it seemed to have a bit of an effect on you as you sighed softly. 

“It’s not that I don’t like you,” you started to explain, “I mean come on we’re practically strangers and I’m supposed to give myself up to you completely in a few weeks time, do you really expect me to be happy about that?” You watched Juns eyes shift around the room for a moment, clicking his tongue as he processed what you said. His slender frame leaned against the support of your bed with his arms crossed over his chest as he looked back at you. 

“We wouldn’t be strangers if you gave me a chance you know?” he pointed out. You opened your mouth to argue but he cut you off with a single lift of his finger, “From the moment I came home to you I’ve been trying to get close to you and every time you push me away. I like to think I’m a patient man Y/N but your actions hurt me you know? So do tell me how am I supposed to get close to you when you constantly keep me at arm's length?”  You froze, eyes widening and mouth hanging slightly open as you tried to defend yourself. Even though you knew that Jun was right, the prideful part of you didn’t want to admit that fact. Just like you didn’t want to admit that you were too scared to let him get close to you. You weren’t sure if Jun read your mind, or he was just that observant, but you were snapped out of your little daze when you heard him chuckle. “So that’s how you want to play it then? You want to keep me as a stranger despite everything?” 

“Is there something so wrong with that?” you challenged, mirroring his position. Juns eyes scaled your form for a moment before sighing and glancing away. 

“I am trying you know,” he argued, “I wouldn’t have chosen you to be my bride if I didn’t see something special in you and you won’t even let me prove myself to you. That’s quite cold hearted you know.” You paused for a moment at his confession, not realizing he was the one who chose you but also never seeing him this sincere before. 

“What do you mean you chose me? You never even met me before that night?” you questioned, though it seemed Jun was back to his normal self as he merely clicked his tongue. 

“That is a story for another time my dear, you still haven’t answered my question?” he urged. Jun adjusted slightly and hardened his gaze as he looked back at you, making you feel tiny compared to him. You bit the tip of your tongue as you tried to think of a way out of this but it was clear he wasn’t leaving without an answer. 

“I guess I don’t know what I want,” you admitted sheepishly. Jun hummed in thought and you could have sworn you saw a smirk ghost across his lips before he was hardening his gaze again. 

“Well, let's think about it this way then, I want to get you close to me and you are afraid of opening up and letting me do that correct?” you wanted to protest but he shook his head, “It’s a yes or no question Y/N.” 

“I suppose,” you whispered, though it seemed he heard you anyway. 

“Well clearly neither of us are going to get what we want with how things are now, so why don’t we try something new? If you are willing to put that hard front of yours aside for a minute I have a deal for you,” he proposed, effectively catching you off guard. 

“What kind of deal exactly?” 

“It’s a simple deal really,” he assured, “one that I think both of us will benefit from. How it works is you give me a chance every day to win your heart. If I succeed, I get to give you a kiss. If I fail, that's a day you get to go out.” Your eyes widened as you processed his words. It seemed like it would be easy for you given how you avoided him thus far, but you knew this also meant he would be trying harder to win your attention. “Of course,” he continued after a moment, “this means you will also have to adapt to my schedule in order to be fair, but I’m sure you’d have just as much fun in the night life.” You nodded and took a moment to think it over, having the sinking feeling that there was more to this agreement than he was letting on. 

“What’s the catch?” you asked. 

“There’s no catch, it’s as straightforward as I can possibly make it. Our wedding is in three weeks, yes? That gives me ample time to prove myself to you, and if I don’t that’s more free time for you before you end up stuck with me, no?” The more you thought about it, the more you realized he had a point. 

“I suppose you’re right, but why are you so insistent on this deal?“ Jun let out an almost annoyed chuckle, but his expression didn’t falter. 

“We are destined to be together, you know. Not only is this a chance to be close to you but it’s also a fun build up to the main event where I finally get to kiss you where I want.” His words made you internally cringe, shaking your head to regain your composure. 

“This is a terrible idea!” you finally exclaimed, causing Jun to scoff.

“What’s the matter, doll? Are you afraid you’ll fall in love with me?” he raised his eyebrow in a teasing manner. You were sure if you tried to roll your eyes any harder, they would end up stuck in the back of your head. 

“I highly doubt I’d ever fall in love with you,” Jun visibly deflated a bit at your words, but regained his composure before you could fully process it. 

“Then there’s nothing for you to lose, might as well humor me and prove me wrong no?” It was getting increasingly harder to argue with him, and at this point you just wanted him to go to bed and leave you alone so you reluctantly gave in. 

“Okay, fine, you have yourself a deal,” you muttered, “are you happy now?” 

“Once you finalize the deal, yes I will be,” Jun agreed, standing up and walking over to you with his arm outstretched, offering his hand to you. You gave him a look of ‘Are you serious?’ before groaning and reaching out to shake his hand. His skin was cool at first, but quickly warmed up with your heat and you also took note of how soft his hand was. He firmly gripped your hand for a moment with a smile before letting go and slipping his hands into the pockets of his pajama pants. “Alright we have a deal, try not to have too much fun out there darling, tomorrow night is when the fun starts,” with that he turned and left your room, the door closing behind him with a gentle click. You stared at the spot he just stood for a minute before sighing and collapsing back down on your bed. Your head spun as you processed the mess you just got yourself into, suddenly no longer feeling like going out. 

ღ ღ ღ ღ ღ

The first week following your agreement went by painfully slow. Most of it was you trying miserably to adjust to the nocturnal life, meaning you were way too tired to acknowledge any of Juns advances. He didn’t seem to mind too much though, giving you space and allowing you to enjoy your victory, though you only left the house maybe once the whole time. The rest of the time you were busy staring off into space or reading whatever book you could get your hands on in the study to keep from passing out. Minghao had actually been a great help during this time, giving you story suggestions and even suggesting a certain tea he drank often that could help you stay awake. He also introduced you to Wonwoo, another one of the prominent workers at the manor. Wonwoo had spent most of his life as a scholar so he showed you all the best stories both hardcover and digital. You also learned he had quite a knack for video games and showed you how to access them on one of the computers in the main study. After that, you found it very easy to stay up during the hours of the night, something Jun immediately took notice of. 

“Good Morning Starlight,” you jumped at the sound of his voice as you stepped into the kitchen, turning to see Jun perched up against the counter. He wasn’t as dressed up as he normally was, wearing only a thin shirt and leather pants with the familiar family jewels adorning his fingers and ears. His hair also wasn’t slicked back like it normally was, merely brushed to keep his bangs out of his eyes. He also didn’t appear to have any makeup on, the familiar black shadow from his eyes all but gone. You hated how attractive he looked even when he didn’t seem to be trying. Though the main thing that caught your attention was his lips, stained red from the thick red liquid he was swirling in a glass. Every few moments he would sip at it as if the drink were a fine red wine, though you knew better than to try and trick yourself. “It’s cows blood, don’t worry,” he muttered when he noticed your hesitation, “we only really need to drink blood maybe once or twice a week to keep up our strength. The supply is donated to us from the local butcher and lasts quite a while. We never feed from humans, unless they offer themselves to us of course.” You blinked a bit as you processed his explanation, again watching the liquid slosh around as he spun the glass between his fingers. 

“I take it you don’t get offers very often?” you questioned, not really sure you wanted to know the answer. 

“You’d be surprised,” he responded, “a lot of humans get curious. They come to us asking just for just a quick bite, allowing them to know the sensation. There’s a rumor going around that a bite from a vampire can be quite pleasurable and they want to know if it’s true so they basically throw themselves at us. It’s kind of funny if you ask me.” You raised an eyebrow at him as he answered the question, addressing the topic like it was the most simple thing in the world. Though you also noticed the underlying tone in his voice when he mentioned pleasure, knowing immediately what he was implying. 

“Does it taste different then?” you asked, and this time it was his turn to raise an eyebrow. 

“Is this really something you’re interested in or are you just trying to make conversation?” when you shrugged he chuckled, “well in a way yes it does. I can’t really describe it to you but the different proteins and types change the flavor.” He quickly finished his drink and set the glass to the side, wiping his lips with his sleeve. “I’m flattered you’re actually taking interest in me though, it means a lot,” he teased as he walked over to you, “enough about me though, I’m guessing you’re hungry right? How about I get you breakfast and then we go through a walk around the manor.” You nodded softly and he smiled, patting your shoulder and motioning for you to take a seat. Jun hummed softly as he roamed around the kitchen, grabbing an assortment of different items and setting them down in front of you before taking a seat himself. 

“Did you just grab the whole kitchen?” you asked, slowly beginning to pick at the food in front of you. 

“I’m not too sure what you like so figured I’d just grab what we had. You’re also the only one who requires food to survive so we don’t have much at the moment,” he confessed. 

“You mean to tell me you guys only drink blood?” you exclaimed, making him laugh. 

“No of course not,” he replied with a chuckle, “we still like to drink and have meals but it’s just for the fun and taste of it. We don’t really get any sustenance from meals like this.” To prove his point he snatched a grape from one of the bowls in front of you, rolling it between his fingers before popping it delicately into his mouth. You hummed in thought as you copied his action, letting the flavors rest on your tongue for a moment before grabbing a roll. There was a silence that fell over the both of you, you focused on eating and Jun watching you intently. Normally this would make you shy away from him but something about this reaction was oddly domestic and quite comfortable. You tried not to overthink this change though, telling yourself you were just used to his presence now that you had spent a week with him. 

“You said you wanted to go for a walk after this?” you remembered as you finished up your breakfast, “doesn’t that seem kind of boring though?” Jun tilted his head and raised an eyebrow at you which made you shrug, “I mean, I’ve pretty much seen everything here already so what’s the point?” This made him chuckle a bit, leaning back in his chair without taking his eyes off of you. 

“I can assure you that you haven’t seen everything, so I figured I’d show you a few fun places you haven’t seen yet,” he explained. 

“Places like what?” you asked.

“Well for starters, do you really expect to stay in a guest room after we’re married?” he answered your question with one of his own, “we’re going to be sharing a lot so I figured I’d show you where you’d be staying after. There are also a few special places that are technically for family only but I don’t think they will mind if I show you a bit early.” You had to admit, now you were intrigued to find out what was being hidden from you. Jun noticed and smiled at your eagerness, standing up and walking over to where you were still seated, “Once you finish eating I’d recommend grabbing a jacket, it gets a bit chilly at this time. I’ll meet you by the staircase when you’re ready.” With that he patted your shoulder softly and exited the room. You turned your head just enough to watch him leave before sighing and returning your attention to the food. 

“He’s planning something, I just know it,” you mutter to yourself, finishing the roll you had been snacking on and putting everything back where you thought it belonged. With that out of the way you ran upstairs to your room and rummaged through your closet for something warm you could put on. It wasn’t that cold in the manor itself so you didn't want to wear anything too heavy, but you assumed based on what Jun said that you would end up outside at some point so you wanted to be prepared. It took a minute for you to finally just settle on a sweater that you could throw over your top, thick enough to keep you warm but not enough to make you overheat. 

When you left your room you saw Jun standing by the staircase as promised, though his back was turned to you as he conversed with two individuals you had never seen before. Two other males, one dressed in all black with his hair slicked back and the other in all white with his hair down, almost as long as Juns but not quite. They dressed like polar opposites yet seemed like they belonged together as you watched them talk with your fiance. They were laughing at something, the one in all white even reaching out to hit at Juns arm. You were curious as to what they were talking about, but didn’t want to be rude and interrupt so you stayed put. The other male noticed you after a second, pointing in your direction which made Jun turn to face you. 

“Ah there you are, don’t be shy come and join us,” he urged you over. You stayed put for a moment before doing as you were told, silently walking to stand beside Jun with a shy smile. “Y/N meet Joshua and Jeonghan, they have been close friends of the family since even before I was born,” he introduced you, both males bowing their heads to you. 

“It’s nice to finally meet you,” Joshua greeted, “though I’m sure we’ll get to know each other very soon.”

“We work very closely with Jun and his family so we were summoned in to help with the wedding, specifically to help you,” Jeonghan explained. You shrunk a little bit in realization, nodding and forcing a smile so as to not be rude. 

“Ah I see, then I guess we will get close won’t we?” you muttered. 

“I hope so, it would be nice to have a friend that’s normal,” Joshua teased.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Jun whined, “I am normal!”

“Suuure you are,” Jeonghan stated with amusement. The three went back and forth for a minute which made you laugh softly, finding the interaction similar to you and your friends. It didn’t last long though as Jun quickly regained himself, clearing his throat and placing his hand on your shoulder. 

“Anyways, I promised this one I’d show her around so we should probably get on that, I’ll see you too before bed though,” with that he was guiding you past the two males, pausing only long enough for you to wave goodbye. 

“They seem fun,” you commented as you walked with Jun down the hall. 

“They’re a pain but I love them,” Jun agreed, “everyone here is like a big family if you haven’t noticed already.” In reality you had noticed, having seen the way the family interacted with each other and their staff. Of course there was mutual respect but it never seemed like a boss and employee type situation, more like a friendship if anything. 

“Is that because of how long everyone's been here?” you asked. 

“Perhaps that may be part of it but I wouldn’t say that’s the reason,” Jun replied, “We may all work together but everyone here has a different story for how they got here. For certain people like Joshua and Jeonghan our families ran together so we were raised together. Then you have people like Mingyu or Wonwoo who came from lower class families and grew to bond with us. Or, on the complete opposite side you have my brother, we’re not related by blood and he was born a human but we took him in and I love him just as much as I would if he were born into the family.” Jun paused for a moment before shaking his head with a soft laugh, “I’m rambling now but my point is that it doesn’t matter where you come from or how long you’ve been around someone, it’s all about the bond you build with them.” You sighed as you processed his words, casting your gaze down to the floor. He talked about bonding with someone as if it was the easiest thing in the world and yet here you were, making things more difficult by avoiding him. You never cared about getting to know him before so why did you feel so guilty all of the sudden? If Jun noticed your shift in mood he didn’t say anything, continuing to walk a bit before stopping in front of a door. 

“Enough of that though, I’m here to show you what your life will look like with me. This should be an exciting moment,” he gave your shoulder a reassuring squeeze and opened the door, gently nudging you inside. You couldn’t help but gasp as you walked in and looked around the room. Juns bedroom was nearly twice the size of yours, the walls mostly the same white color as the rest of the manor but with red accents that gave it an almost romantic glow. The wall opposite you had large window like doors that opened to a small balcony overlooking the outside of the manor, dark red curtains pulled back to let the moonlight seep into the room. The light hit his bed perfectly, centered in the middle of the room like a centerpiece. Delicately carved wooden frames accented with the same red curtains and satin sheets in the same color. The walls were decorated with a few paintings, one of Jun, another of the family, and the last you couldn’t quite make out but the rest was bare. Cautiously you stepped further into the room, feeling the soft rug tickle at your ankles as you walked to the bed, Jun stayed quiet as he watched you. His figure leaned against the doorway with an amused grin as he watched you explore, touching things so gently as if you were worried they would break. 

“Don’t be shy,” he spoke up after a moment, “this will be your room soon enough so don’t be afraid to get used to it.” He closed the door and walked over to where you were, falling back onto the bed and laying with his back against the headboard so he could watch you. 

“This room is amazing,” you said in awe, moving away from his bed and walking over to the balcony. 

“It’s a bit old fashioned for my taste but it is nice,” Jun remarked. 

“Old fashioned?” you asked, to which he nodded softly. 

“This original manor was built by my great grandfather when he was elected into power,” Jun explained, “my grandfather and dad made a few changes to the decor to match the changing times but a lot of it is still the same as when it was first built.” Vampire age was still a concept you were confused by, but given how old Mr. Wen was you could only assume the manor was over a couple thousand years old, which was shocking because it looked brand new. “If you’re wondering why it’s in such good condition, it’s gradually rebuilt and redecorated whenever a new head takes over,” he added. You couldn’t help but scoff a bit at how easily he seemed to read your mind, or maybe he was just that used to these questions. 

“So do you plan on renovating when you take over?” you asked, brushing your hands across the curtain. 

“I have a few ideas, I won’t change much but it would be nice to modernize everything a bit,” he explained, “it would be nice to have a TV in here don’t you think? Maybe a few more computers since I’ve noticed a lot of people here like playing games.” He glanced over at you as he said this, making you smile shyly. 

“There was nothing else to do and Wonwoo showed me how to play so...” he cut you off before you could finish explaining. 

“It doesn’t bother me at all, I want you to be comfortable here,” he promised. You nodded and glanced back outside, having to focus to see outside through your own reflection. Your fingers brushed against the cool railing, searching for the handle to open the door when you heard footsteps behind you. You could almost feel Jun press against you as he reached up to undo the latch and swing the doors open. “It may be a bit high for you to reach,” he teased, patting your head and brushing past you to walk onto the balcony. You quickly followed, shivering a bit at the cold. The balcony wasn’t large, just big enough for the two of you to stand on it comfortably. Over the railing you could see out into the back gardens, a vast maze of different flowers and other plants illuminated by the moon. In the middle stood what appeared to be a fountain, though you couldn’t make out its shape, and in the distance you thought you spotted a greenhouse. “It’s beautiful isn’t it?” 

“It is,” you agreed, looking at the vast array of flowers, “I didn’t even know we had a back garden.”

“There’s only really one way to access it and it’s kind of hidden by the study so it makes sense you didn’t know,” Jun said with a chuckle, “do you want to see it up close?” You eagerly nodded, an action he repeated with a smile, “Alright then, shall we?” He gestured for you to go back into the room, closing the door behind him before offering his arm to you. You hesitated slightly but gave in and wrapped your arm around his, allowing him to guide you out of his room and down the hall. The general study was a place you were familiar with, a large room decorated with multiple wooden desks and bookshelves. The main room branched off into two smaller studies, one that Minghao used as a personal art studio and the other that belonged to Jun, though you’d never seen the older brother use his. 

Jun led you through the room to a back area that had previously been concealed by one of the large bookshelves. Had he not led you right to it, you wouldn’t have even noticed that it was there. 

“Wow this is hidden,” you commented, Jun nodding and letting go of your arm to open the door. 

“There’s quite a few rare plants out here with very special properties. We keep the entrance hidden from guests to keep people from abusing them,” he explained as he opened the door and nudged you through. This time you were prepared for the chill that attacked you as you stepped outside, pulling your sweater closer to your body. Almost immediately your senses picked up on the scents of the various flowers surrounding you. It was almost overpowering but you found it quite pleasurable. Jun wrapped his arm around your shoulders and led you through the rows of flowers and into the clearing. You stopped a few times to glance at certain ones that caught your eye, careful not to get too close and ruin them. Jun didn’t have the best knowledge of all the flowers, but he told you the brief information he did know, such as names or where they were from. You had to give him credit for trying, making it clear that he was trying to impress you, and perhaps it was working.  

When you finally made it to the middle of the garden you gasped. You hadn’t been able to make out the full view from the balcony but now you could see everything. The area was outlined with various shrubs and trees that blocked it off from the rest of the garden, though there was an opening that allowed the moon to shine through. There were a few benches nestled into the corner, and in the middle was the fountain you saw earlier. Carved marble base leading up to the silhouette of an angel, the vase she was holding being the part of the fountain that water spilled out of in addition to small jets around the base. 

“This is beautiful,” you mused, walking over to take a seat on the fountain. There were a few stray water drops that sprayed you but you paid no mind, closing your eyes and listening to the sound of the water. Jun stayed in his spot the whole time, smiling to himself as he watched you, enjoying the first peaceful moment between the two of you. 

“It really is, isn’t it?” he agreed, though he wasn’t exactly talking about the fountain. He couldn’t stop his eyes from trailing across your frame, taking in every detail while you were peacefully unaware of what he was doing. Eventually he got tired of watching you though, moving to take a seat beside you. Your eyes opened as you felt his leg brush against yours, glancing over to see Jun looking up at the sky. Now it was your turn to admire him, taking note of the way his long hair framed his face, and how he seemed to glow under the moonlight. You wondered, if he hadn’t been immortal, would he still be this beautiful? “Like what you see?” he asked without looking away from his spot, making you shy away from him. 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you tried to argue, “I was just enjoying the view of the garden.”

“I take it I am part of the garden then? You’ve been staring at me for at least the past five minutes.”

“Does my staring bother you?” you questioned. 

“No not at all,” he assured, finally looking down at you, “in fact I actually find it quite comforting. It means that there’s at least some part of you that’s drawn to me.” You wanted to argue but opted against it, knowing there was no winning with Jun. He smirked at you before glancing at the sky one last time, “Damn, time really does fly by fast doesn’t it. The sun should be coming up soon.” 

“Wow already?” you exclaimed, glancing up but not seeing any sign of the sky getting brighter. 

“You learn new tricks to tell time when you need to avoid the sun,” he said, “I’d rather go in early than be caught off guard otherwise I would take you to see the greenhouse. If you’re impressed by this I can imagine what you’ll think of it.”

“What happens if you stay out in the sun?” you asked, causing him to side eye you for a moment. 

“We don’t burst into flames or anything if that’s what you’re thinking,” he said with a slight hint of amusement, “It does burn us pretty badly though, like think of the feeling you’d get if you kept your hand on a hot stove or even a flame. For purebloods like myself, if we didn’t get inside within a few hours we would likely succumb to the heat and burn. Though some half bred vampires aren’t fully developed so they can go out if they wish.” You let out a soft “oh” before looking away, not even wanting to imagine that pain. Jun gave your shoulder an assuring pat and urged you to look at him, “Don’t worry about me though, I don’t plan on letting myself get hurt anytime soon,” he smiled softly at you, squeezing your shoulder until you smiled back, “there we go I like it better when you smile. You’re more than welcome to stay out here if you wish, but I really should get inside before the sun comes up.” He squeezed your shoulder one last time and was about to get up before he stopped himself, “Oh but before I go, I do believe I get a prize for today, no?” You were confused and about to ask what he meant before remembering the deal you made with him. 

“Alright I guess you do win for today,” you gave in. Jun smiled and grabbed your hand, playing with your fingers for a moment before placing a soft kiss on the back of your palm. His lips were soft and slightly cooler in texture, much like the rest of him, but you couldn’t help feeling your body heat up at the contact. 

“One of hopefully many,” Jun whispered, his breath and lips tickling your skin, “until tomorrow my love.” He placed your hand back into your lap and stood up, adjusting his shirt as he walked out of the garden, slow enough for you to follow if you wished but not pressuring you. You watched him leave before returning your attention to the fountain with a sigh, glancing down at your reflection in the water. Without Jun beside you, it suddenly felt much colder, the breeze blowing the water onto you like a harsh mist. Still you didn’t move for quite a while, even as the sun rose and you felt exhaustion creep into you, you didn’t want to move. You hated how lonely it suddenly felt without Jun beside you, and you hated the way your hand still tingled where he kissed you. Though you told yourself it was just being flustered and touch starved. Jun was still a stranger to you, and there was no way you could ever see yourself falling for a vampire. You kept telling yourself that as you finally stood up and slowly made your way inside, even as you changed and tucked yourself into bed the words repeated. 

You could never fall in love with Wen Junhui. 

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Unfortunately for you, fate seemed to have other ideas for what you wanted. Jun, encouraged by getting his first kiss, seemed to only up his game as the days went by. Meal dates, going for walks, performing a song for you, even taking you out into town to give you an idea of what the nightlife was like. You quickly learned that things didn’t operate much differently when vampires were running things and most were more than welcoming to you. Jun had taken you to all of his favorite stops, including his favorite restaurant and an arcade he went to with his friends a lot growing up. You also learned a lot more about him during that time. Jun explained to you how his family line is actually from China and they weren’t always as powerful. The Wen name grew with his great grandfather, who had moved in search of business opportunities and ended up in the right place at the right time. Because of their heritage, the family was in charge of many international affairs. You also learned that Jun was multilingual, practically begging for him to say something to you in Chinese when you heard that. Lastly you learned that Jun was a man of many talents, especially when it came to singing or dancing. It felt like you were meeting him for the first time, and every time you learned something new about him you found yourself falling for him more. No matter how hard you tried to deny it, or to distance yourself from him, he always made his way back with a kiss right before the sun rose. After your hand it was your wrist, then the top of your head, then your forehead, and, most recently, your cheek. Every kiss made you tingle and crave more of him, as if there was some type of love potion on his lips that he applied to you with each one. You supposed that wasn’t entirely out of the question but you doubted that Jun would be desperate enough to try a stunt like that. 

Not everyday was a victory for Jun though, there had been a few where you weren’t in the mood for his antics or something happened that pulled his attention away from you. Those days he would sigh and tell you to enjoy your night out with a semi forced smile, making sure you knew to call him if something went wrong. You tried to enjoy going out alone those days, and to be fair you did have fun exploring the new shops that were usually closed in the day, but you always felt slightly guilty. Every time you left you saw Juns disappointed expression in your mind and you ended up dragging yourself back to the manor way earlier than you intended. Most of the time he would be busy with something work or wedding related and wouldn’t realize you were home until much later. One time, however, you caught him working in his study, smiling at your presence and inviting you to sit with him as he worked. You ended up staying there for hours talking about whatever came to mind. 

Unfortunately, there was a new issue presenting itself that threatened to drive a wedge between the two of you. That issue being the fact that your wedding was now only a few days away. Meaning that not only was Jun being dragged away, but you were as well. The realization of everything happening weighed on you like a million bricks and suddenly it felt like you were back to where you started when you first moved in. You were nervous, on edge, and it seemed like all progress being made with Jun was starting to go backwards. You never saw him anymore, and when you did he was too busy to acknowledge you. The most you ever got was a hello or him telling you how gorgeous you looked before he was being dragged off again to who knows where. 

You didn’t even know why the distance upset you so much when not even two weeks ago all you wanted was for him to leave you alone. You did your best to convince yourself that you were just lonely without him, occupying your time by hanging out with any servant you could find or even Minghao. The younger vampire was clearly put off by your sudden attachment to him, but he allowed you to keep him company anyways. You would read with him or sit in his study/studio with him while he worked on a new painting until Jun or a worker came to find you. Minghao definitely wasn’t one for words but you learned quickly that he was good with advice and listening. Whenever he saw that frustrated look on your face he would offer you a glass of tea or wine and listen to you as you vented your frustrations. Depending on your mood he would either then offer you advice or distract you with something else like picking out colors for the wedding. You also quickly learned the younger vampire had quite the eye for color and fashion, so much so that you swear he lit up when you asked him to help you with your wedding dress. 

That was exactly what the two of you were doing now, with the assistance of Joshua and Jeonghan. You had been standing in the middle of your room modeling every style, color, and fabric known to man. Jeonghan and Joshua seemed happy with most of the designs, but Minghao still hadn’t found anything he had liked. 

“This one’s too long.”

“This one's too short.”

“Neckline on this one isn’t flattering.”

“The dress shape hides your figure too much.”

“This color doesn’t match your complexion at all.”

“This color is cute but the style is all wrong.”

By what easily felt like the millionth try on, you were frustrated and about ready to throw a pillow at Minghao. The male in question was humming softly to himself as he circled around you, clicking his tongue in disapproval. 

“Hao, is all of this really necessary?” you whined, struggling to stand up straight as you felt something poking your side. 

“Of course it is!” he replied, “you want to look perfect for your wedding right? We should not settle for anything less than perfect.” He circled around you one more time before shaking his head, “We’re getting closer but no this one is still off, next.” You couldn’t help but groan, half tempted to slam your head into the nearest wall when Joshua spoke up. 

“I think that’s the last one we have right now and I think Y/N is getting tired,” he stated softly. Minghao sighed and shook his head, muttering something under his breath as Joshua spoke again. 

“How about we just sit down and discuss what we did and didn’t like about all of them, so you can narrow down the list and we can find something.” You had half the mind to run over and kiss Joshua for the idea, nodding eagerly when Minghao glanced at you. 

“Very well,” he agreed, “go get changed Y/N and we can discuss this, we need to get this done soon so we can find the dress before the wedding day.” You wanted to roll your eyes at the mention of the wedding. Honestly you didn’t care for your dream wedding at this point, you felt like you weren’t getting a say in much and you were so stressed that you just wanted everything to be over. 

Nonetheless, you sat down with all three boys and discussed your ideas until you had designed a dress that everyone agreed on. It would be slightly form fitting to flatter your figure, but also allow you to move around freely, with a neckline that was not modest but not too revealing either. The same red, white, and black color scheme that the rest of the family seemed to love, and a few lace accents to make it elegant. You would decide on your accessories and veil later, but Minghao seemed satisfied with the design and ran off to get working, Joshua and Jeonghan hesitantly following after apologizing to you for the younger's attitude. 

Exhausted and beyond frustrated, you found yourself leaving your room and going to the one place you knew people would leave you alone, the garden. Tucking yourself away on one of the farthest benches, you sighed and buried your head in your knees. The sound of the fountain and the wind rustling the leaves brought you great comfort as you tried to clear your mind. No more stress about the wedding, no more stress about Jun, no more stress about anything. Why couldn’t your life just go back to the way it was before? Why did you have to be stuck here, getting married to a vampire to help your family? Even worse, why were you actually starting to fall in love with him? Why couldn’t you have just stayed strangers and just used the wedding for show? Part of you wished you never met Jun until your wedding day, then all of this would have been significantly easier. 

“There you are,” lifting your head, you locked eyes with the one man who occupied your mind. Jun looked exhausted, his shirt messily unbuttoned under his vest which also wasn’t fastened properly. His eyeshadow was smudged, making it look like he hadn’t slept in years, and his hair was messy as if he just rolled out of bed. He was a mess, and yet you still found him unbelievably gorgeous. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you,” he confessed as he sat down beside you, “Jeonghan told me you were in a pretty bad mood earlier.”

“I suppose you could stay that,” you muttered, “what about you though, you look like a mess.”

“Thanks I tried my best,” he replied sarcastically, though his expression quickly softened, “I just have a lot to do, that's all. My parents have been preparing me for the wedding and taking over the family so I guess I’ve been stretched pretty thin.”

“So I’ve noticed,” you whispered to yourself, Jun heard it though as you felt his arm wrap around you. 

“Awe don’t tell me my sweet girl missed me?” he teased, “I’m sorry I haven’t been giving you much attention, will you ever forgive me.”

“Shut up!” you groaned as you nudged him off of you, “who said I missed you?”

“Your actions are worth a million words, you know?” he pointed out. When you didn't respond he huffed and leaned closer as if telling you a secret, “Also you should know that word gets around quickly in this family.” It took you a second to realize what he meant, internally groaning as you realized his brother probably told him everything. 

“Remind me to kill Minghao next time I see him,” you hissed which made Jun laugh. 

“You can’t kill what’s already dead My Love. Also don’t be mad at him, he’s only trying to help.” You bit your bottom lip and cast your gaze down, watching the grass sway beneath your feet for a moment. Jun quickly dropped the teasing and cleared his throat, tapping your shoulder to get your attention, “Seriously though Y/N, I know I haven’t been around much recently and I’m sorry. I can’t make up for that but I am here now so talk to me, what’s bothering you?” You debated answering for a moment, gnawing at your lip and curling up more. Jun waited patiently for you to collect your thoughts, not taking his gaze off of you as you finally sat up properly and looked at him. 

“It’s stupid but this isn’t what I wanted,” you confessed, “I always dreamed about having this royal and lavish wedding and now I’m getting it but not how I wanted. I don’t know anything about how vampire weddings work and I haven’t gotten a single say in anything. I didn’t get to choose who I marry, when, how, hell I barely even got a say in my own dress. It hurts even worse because I’ve been so confused about my feelings for you and now I don’t know what to do.” You took a deep breath after speaking, feeling like a huge weight had been lifted off of you. Jun stayed silent for a second, his occasional blinking the only sign that he hadn’t completely frozen. Then, before you had time to react, he was pulling you against him in a tight hug. You gasped, needing a moment to process the contact before giving in and hugging him back. Your arms wrapped tightly around his waist and your head buried into his chest, ignoring the lack of a heartbeat and instead focusing on his scent. Of course you had been close to Jun before but not like this. His scent was very floral, but there was also a hint that reminded you of herbal tea, it was refreshing and very much him. 

“I’m sorry,” Jun muttered into your hair, pulling away from you just enough so that he could look at you, “this is all my fault. I’m the one that dragged you here, and I’m the one that kept you in the dark. I should have told you everything from the beginning.”

“Can you tell me now?” you asked, looking up at him. 

“What do you want to know?” he answered you with his own question. 

“Everything, why did you choose me? Also what is going to happen at our wedding and what happens after? I want to know so I can prepare.” Jun exhaled harshly but nodded, keeping one hand on your arm while the other moved to run through his still messy hair. 

“Well to start, I chose you because I saw something special in you. Families like mine always married off their next in line to a human, that’s an agreement to keep things fair on both sides. I am the oldest son and so I knew when the time came I would need to find someone to marry, my parents knew this too so they often sent me out during the day. I was disguised of course and protected from the sun, so I think I did a good job blending in. You probably don’t even remember that you’ve met me before, I stopped by your work one day with a friend. I don’t know why but something about you was different, special, I knew that exact moment that you were the one. So I asked my friend to get to know you and everything he told me only proved to me that I made the right decision.” You tried your hardest to remember ever getting close to someone that would know Jun, or even when you saw him before but your mind was coming up blank. 

“What was your friend's name?” you asked, desperate to know who it was he was talking about. 

 “Kwon Soonyoung, but he often had people call him Hoshi,” your eyes widened at the name, recognizing it as one of your old coworkers. He started working there about a month after you and you two became friends almost immediately, you had no idea that he had any connection to someone like Jun. 

“Him, really?” you asked. 

“What, didn’t expect that I could befriend a human?” he questioned. 

“No no not that it’s just, how did I have no idea?” Jun smiled and patted your head playfully, laughing as it messed up your hair. 

“You not knowing means he did his job well, but yeah I learned about you through him, and then when I was told it was time, I sent Mingyu to get you. The timing wasn’t the best though as Hao and I had to return back to China to deal with a few personal matters, which is why you spent the first year with just my parents,” he explained. You were both silent for a moment as you processed the information, then Jun spoke again, “as for the wedding, it will probably be a bit different than you’re expecting. Everything will still happen that does at a normal wedding, but there is also the business element and the mating ritual that goes along with it. All our friends and family will be there, but so will the main political powers on both sides to ensure that the wedding is official, so it may be a bit more crowded than you’re used to. Though it is your wedding as much as it is mine so if you would like to join me in planning things I would love to have you with me.” You nodded and smiled, glad he was giving you the chance to be involved, though your smile quickly dropped as you remembered the mating part. 

“What exactly is the mating ritual?” you asked, albeit a bit hesitant. Jun sighed, almost looking like he didn’t want you to ask.  

“Divorce isn’t really a thing in our life,” he started, “so vampires are known to ‘mate’ for life I guess you could say. When we marry the bond between us is shared by a blood exchange, it will keep me connected to you, allow me to know what you’re feeling and be close to you even if not physically.”

“A blood exchange, that means that...” you trailed off. 

“I will have to bite you,” he answered your question for you, “but it will be quick I promise and you can choose where you want me to do it.”

“Will it hurt?” 

“It shouldn’t, remember I said most people even say it’s pleasurable. You’ll feel a little prick and then after that it should just feel warm,” he explained. 

“I don’t have to drink your blood though, right?” you asked. 

“Not unless you want to become a vampire yourself,” he responded with a chuckle, “but you don’t have to decide that now.” You nodded softly, looking down and feeling your cheeks heat up as another question entered your mind. 

“Umm, what about the wedding night?” you immediately regretted the question as you saw a mischievous glint in Juns eye. 

“Why are you that excited for what’s going to happen?” when he saw you blush harder he snickered and patted your shoulder, “relax Qinqin I’m just teasing you. Eventually my parents are going to expect an heir to the Wen family, but if you’re not ready on our wedding night we can just share a drink and relax.” 

“What if I am ready?” you asked yourself outloud, not really thinking about it until you saw Juns expression. 

“Are you ready?” he pushed, you quickly felt shy and looked away, but he placed his fingers under your chin to make you look at him. 

“Yes? No? I mean...I don’t know I don’t even know how I feel about you,” you confessed. Jun hummed in thought and you could have sworn you saw him blushing a bit himself. 

“I think you do know and you’re lying to yourself,” he whispered. Your eyes widened as he drew slightly closer, barely inches away from you. His dark eyes were blown and piercing as they stared at you, your own glancing down on his lips then back at his eyes. “Just admit it Y/N,” he whispered, “I won, you’re falling for me.” Your breath hitched, wanting to turn away but feeling like you were frozen in place. Jun huffed and leaned forward, placing a kiss to the side of your lips, just enough to tease you. Your eyes fluttered for a moment at the contact before opening again and looking up at him in confusion. “That’s how I know you do feel something for me,” he pointed out, placing another kiss to your forehead before pulling away, “don’t worry my dear, you’ll get the real thing in a few days, just be patient.” You didn’t know whether you wanted to hit him at that moment or pull him close to you and kiss him. He didn’t give you the option though as he was standing up and excusing himself, letting you know that he would be in his room if you needed company. You whined to yourself as you were quickly up on your feet and rushing after him, not wanting to be alone just yet. 

“I’ll get you back for that Wen Jun!”

ღ ღ ღ ღ ღ

You definitely took Jun up on his offer to join him in wedding planning, getting a say in everything from the decor to the catering. You also got a glance into the life Jun lived, watching as he handled different affairs and communicated with different workers. It was honestly endearing watching him in his element, though you did your best to stay out of his way. Whenever he wasn’t too busy though you guys were enjoying your time together, oftentimes with him having his arm around you while you looked at decor ideas for the manor or holding your hand as you organized seating for the wedding. That domestic feeling returned and this time you didn’t fight it, actually finding yourself excited for your wedding. 

It felt like only a minute before the day in question came, you were woken up early when Minghao, Joshua, and Mrs. Wen burst into your room. The sun hadn’t even set completely, as you could see the rays poking out through a crack in your curtains. Minghao quickly rushed to pull them fully closed though as Mrs. Wen placed a tray with fruit and tea on your nightstand. 

“Rise and shine my dear,” she urged, “it’s time to get you ready for your big day!” 

“Already?” you asked, rubbing the sleep from your eyes, “it’s so early.” 

“Yes but there’s a lot to do,” the older woman reminded, “we need to get you fed and dressed, do your hair and makeup, and then get the final preparations ready. Our guests will start arriving in a few hours so we need to make sure everything is done now.” You groaned softly but nodded, taking the tea from the tray and sipping at it as you woke up, Mrs. Wen fretting over your health and complexing as Minghao and Joshua focused on getting your dress. “You look a little pale my dear, do you need anything? I can go get you some medicine.”

“I’m fine I promise, just a bit nervous,” you assured. 

“Mom, relax, I’m sure you remember how nervous you were when you got married,” Minghao argued, making a few last minute adjustments on your dress. 

“You shouldn’t listen to everything your father says, you weren’t even there,” the woman argued, though Minghao only giggled as he focused on his work. You also laughed a bit at the family's banter before finally giving in and getting out of bed. 

“Alright what do you need me to do?” you asked. 

“You go wash up and then I’ll help you get dressed, just call when you’re ready for me. Then the boys and I will help make sure everything is in place and do your hair and makeup. By then it should be almost time to start so you can rest,” Mrs. Wen explained. You nodded and made your way to the bathroom, quickly showering and brushing your teeth before calling for help with your dress. It was simple enough that you were mostly able to get it on yourself, but you still needed help with the zipper and the layers. You couldn’t help but look at yourself in the mirror as the older woman helped you out, tearing up at the sight of you in the dress. You hadn’t been the most fond of the idea at first, but seeing yourself in it made you realize how gorgeous it actually was. It seemed your soon to be mother in law agreed as she stared at you in awe. “You look gorgeous Darling,” she praised, adjusting the bodice and allowing you to glance at yourself. 

“Thank you, I feel gorgeous,” you agreed. She clapped in excitement before helping you back out to your room where the two males were waiting. Minghao was holding various sewing supplies and Joshua was holding your veil and a few other accessories. Behind them on the bed was a kit which you assumed was for your hair and makeup. Both males smiled as they saw you, Minghao clapping softly as he walked over to you. 

“I told you this would be perfect,” he boasted, getting a gentle whack on the back of his head from his mom. He didn’t acknowledge it though as he looked over you to see if there were any needed adjustments. “I’m sorry if this is awkward to ask but,” he said nervously, “but have you decided where you want your…mating bite to be?” The room went awkwardly silent, you stiffening and looking at him which made him rub the back of his neck. “I’m only asking to know if I need to adjust the dress at all so Jun can access it, that’s all.” The room went silent again, all the attention on you as they waited for a reaction. 

“It’s fine if you don’t know yet,” Mrs. Wen assured but you shook your head. 

“No no it’s fine,” you promised, “I guess I haven’t really thought about it, what would you suggest?”

“Well,” she trailed off as she thought about it, “I personally chose my neck, it’s a bit more intimate than your wrist but it would be easier for him to reach and the mark is easier to hide.” You nodded, placing your finger on your pulse point as you thought about it. 

“If you want to consider both options I was bitten on my wrist when I turned,” Minghao said, showing you his wrist where you could clearly see the scar, “it doesn’t hurt but it does feel tingly and if he bites your wrist it may take a bit longer.” You reached out to gently grab the male's wrist, which he allowed, tracing your thumb over the two bite marks then letting him go. 

“I guess I’ll go with my neck, it seems easier,” you decided. 

“Good choice,” Joshua muttered from his spot on the bed. Minghao nodded and moved to adjust your sleeve, pinning it down a bit so that your neck was exposed. 

“That should stay put,” he commented, “all you have to do when it’s time is tilt your head back a bit.” He mimicked the action and you nodded in understanding, not wanting to question how he knew what to do. 

“Now then,” Mrs Wen quickly spoke up, “we still have a lot to do, go ahead and have a seat and we’ll finish getting you ready.”

The next three hours were spent making sure everything was absolutely perfect, eventually Minghao had to excuse himself to help Jun and get ready himself but Joshua and Mrs. Wen stayed with you to keep you company. Apparently there was also a moment where Jun tried to sneak in and see you but he was promptly dragged away. To pass the time the two told you stories about the past, specifically stories they knew would embarrass Jun. Moments like him dancing around with his arms behind his back, failing miserably at sports, or just randomly running up to a mirror and saying how handsome he was before running away. Every story made you laugh more as you imagined the Jun you knew doing all these things. Before long you got a knock on your door, one of the female staff poking her head to let you know it was time. Joshua quickly took his leave after giving you a reassuring smile, leaving you with Mrs. Wen. The woman glanced at you to silently ask if you were ready, handing you your bouquet before linking your arms and leading you out of your room and to the stairs. 

The manor was set up so that the main room was turned into a ballroom type setting, all of the guests sitting with their backs towards you. At the front of the room, stood by the now decorated front door, was Jun. He was wearing a perfectly pressed white shirt under a black vest with red accents and a matching red tie. His makeup was sharp but toned back a bit, enough to make his eyes look piercing and his lips stand out more. His shoulder length hair was also slicked back, the top layer tied up in a half ponytail. Minghao, Joshua, and Wonwoo were standing behind him, all dressed up in matching suits. At the announcement of your arrival, all the guests immediately turned to face you. Many of them were faces you didn’t recognize, but you could see your close friends and family towards the front, all smiling up at you. Mrs. Wen gave your arm a gentle squeeze before walking you down the stairs and towards the front, your eyes locking onto Juns from behind your veil. He couldn’t see you properly yet, but you swore you’d be able to see his smile from a mile away. 

Mrs. Wen bowed her head to the officiant before handing you over to her son and moving to take her seat beside her husband. Jun took your flowers and handed them to Joshua behind him, lifting your veil and running a finger across your cheek. 

“You look breathtaking,” he whispered. 

“So do you,” you replied. He chuckled softly and grabbed your hand, both of you turning to face the officiant. The majority of the ceremony went by in a blur for you, mainly because you were more focused on the way Jun was looking at you and the way he was holding your hand. Your warmth seeped into him and warmed his skin, and you could feel his thumb rubbing on the back of your palm. You only snapped back into reality when it was time for the rings, Jun slipping a black band with his family's crest engraved on it onto your ring finger, you doing the same for him. With that the officiant closed their book with a satisfied smile. 

“It is my honor to present to you Mr. and Mrs. Wen, you may claim your bride.” Jun could no longer hide the mischievous glint in his eye as he looked at you. 

“Finally the moment I’ve been waiting for,” he whispered. 

“Yeah, me too,” you teased, cupping his cheeks and pulling him down to kiss him. Jun gasped in shock but quickly melted into you, wrapping one arm around your waist and the other cupping your cheek. The room was silent and for a moment it was just the two of you, finally sharing every emotion that you had been hiding from yourselves and each other. Though the moment couldn’t last forever as you had to pull away from each other. Your eyes were glazed over as you looked up at Jun, the male smiling down at you as if you were the most precious thing he’d ever laid his eyes on. Though you remembered that it wasn’t over as you felt him brush your hair away from your neck. You stiffened a bit which he noticed, the hand on your waist rubbing soothing circles into your side. 

“Deep breath okay, it’ll be over before you know it,” he promised, “are you ready?” You did what he said and took a deep breath, closing your eyes and leaning your head back like how Minghao had told you. 

“I’m ready,” you whispered after a moment, though you didn’t dare open your eyes. Jun didn’t say another word, but you felt his fingers tracing your neck, followed by his lips. You felt him kiss your neck once, then twice, then you felt his fangs poke your skin. You gasped as you felt a sharp prick against your skin, the pain only lasting a second though before you felt a warm tingling sensation. The feeling was hard to place, but it almost felt like your body was going numb despite your senses being heightened. Jun hummed against your neck, sucking for a moment before pulling away and swiping his tongue across the bite. His hand that had been on your shoulder moved to rest against your back to support you. 

���How do you feel?” he asked, keeping his grip tight on you just in case you got dizzy. It took a moment for your feelings to return to normal, you relaxing a bit in his arms before opening your eyes and looking up at him.

“I’m okay,” you assured. Jun smiled and nodded, pulling you against him for a moment to kiss the top of your head before turning to face the crowd. The proof of a successful bond had the room erupting into loud clapping and cheer, almost loud enough to be deafening. Jun chuckled a bit as you winced away from the noise, wrapping his arm around you and leading you to the kitchen where a banquet was already prepared. 

You stayed beside your husband the whole time, practically hiding behind him as hundreds of people came to greet you. They all congratulated you both and would introduce themselves to you as family friends or business partners or whatever else. You didn’t care enough to remember all of their names, knowing that you likely wouldn’t see them again for a long time. Jun did all the talking for the two of you, allowing you to hide behind him as he made pleasantries with all of the guests. Though you did stray away from him long enough to greet your parents. Your mother was already in tears when she approached you, pulling you into her arms and crying about how grown up you were. It took everything in your power not to cry yourself as you embraced her, promising that you were fine and happy with Jun. You stayed holding her for a moment, letting go to hug your dad before deciding that it would be best for them to go. Every other human guest had excused themselves at this point and you knew your parents would be working again in the morning so you bid them goodnight with one last hug and a kiss from your mother. After they left you returned back to Jun, the male glancing over at you with a smile before returning his attention to his guests. It was fine at first, and you tried to interact with as many guests as possible, but after about an hour of still meeting new people you quickly got bored. Not only did you want to get away from the crowd but you were also desperate to finally be alone with your husband. It finally got to a point where you decided to take matters into your own hand, tugging at Juns arm to get his attention. 

“As nice as this is, I would love to go get used to my new bedroom now,” you whispered when he finally looked at you. Jun immediately caught on to what you were implying, smirking down at you and licking his lips. 

“You’re a scandalous little thing aren’t you?” he teased, but still he quickly excused the both of you for the night. He used the excuse that you were tired and still getting used to the change in schedule to anyone who asked as he escorted you out of the kitchen and up the stairs. No one even gave you a second glance as you followed Jun into his room, quietly closing and locking the door behind you. 

ღ ღ ღ ღ ღ

The second the door locked you were all over Jun, gripping his vest and smashing your lips together in a desperate kiss. The male eagerly returned the kiss, removing your veil so he could tangle his hands into your hair. Your tongues battled each other, lips remaining locked as you started exploring each other's bodies. Your hands made quick work of undoing his vest while he fumbled with unzipping your dress. You pulled away once you felt him pull the zipper down, his lips attacking your neck as he pulled your dress down your body. Due to the shape of the dress you had opted not to wear a bra underneath exposing your breasts to the cool air once your dress was off. Jun took advantage of this, gripping at your breasts and pinching your nipples between his fingers. You moaned softly at the feeling, growing louder as you felt his fangs graze against your neck, kicking your dress off as he pulled you close to him. 

“You have no idea how good you taste,” he muttered against your neck, “it’s almost addicting.” 

“You can have another taste if you want,” you gasped out, he paused long enough to glance up at you, making sure you were serious. You smiled and ran your fingers through his hair as a silent confirmation. Jun took the hint and trailed his lips back to where he originally bit you, running his tongue across the area once before biting down again. This time you moaned at the sting, tightening your grip on his hair and throwing your head back as the same warm feeling returned. This time Jun groaned into your neck, sucking harder and pressing your bodies together. His hands gripped at your hips desperately, grinding them against his own as he continued sucking at your neck. Though he pulled away out of fear of making you dizzy. Jun placed one last kiss on your neck before lifting his head and licking his lips. 

“Yep, very addicting indeed,” he groaned. You took a deep breath and chuckled softly, pulling away from him slightly so you could loosen his tie. Jun watched in amusement as you undid his tie and the first few buttons of his shirt, pushing him back until he fell back on the bed. 

“I think it’s my turn to have a taste,” you cooed. Jun leaned back and watched in amusement as you climbed on the bed to straddle him. He grunted softly as you trailed kisses down his neck and chest, slowly undoing the buttons of his shirt as you went. You had known Jun was slightly muscular but you hadn’t realized how much until now as you felt the outline of his muscles. 

“Like what you see?” he teased once he realized you stopped your actions. 

“A lot actually,” you teased back, Jun chuckled and licked his lips as you trailed more kisses down his stomach until you reached his belt. You made quick work of undoing the belt and popping open his button. Jun lifted his hips just enough to allow you to pull his pants and boxers down, revealing his already semi hard length. You could already tell his length was more than you expected and suddenly you were frozen. In fact, you actually had no idea what you were doing so seeing him exposed for you was a lot to handle. Jun noticed this and adjusted a bit to look up at you. “Are you okay doll?” he asked, reaching a hand out to stroke your cheek. 

“Yeah I just…I don’t really know what to do,” you confessed. Jun had to keep himself from chuckling at your adorableness. 

“You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to,” he told you. 

“No I want to!” you whined. 

“Very well, want me to tell you what to do then?” he asked, to which you nodded, “okay then, grip it gently and start by stroking it.” You hesitantly did as you were told, Jun immediately gasping and falling back against the bed at your touch. You stroked him softly for a minute, feeling him twitch in your hand and rubbing at his tip for a second before gaining your confidence back and leaning down to place kitten licks along his head. Jun twitched at the contact, groaning softly and throwing his head back as you licked across his length before finally taking his tip into your mouth. “There you go, just like that,” he urged. His hand that had been on your cheek returned to grip softly at your hair, tugging it softly and brushing it out of your face so he could see you. You looked up to meet his gaze and moaned softly at the sight of him. His eyes were wide and his mouth slightly opened as he panted, his muscles were tensing from the pleasure and his hair was now out of its bond and falling messily into his face. His grip on your hair tightened more as you took him deeper, an audible groan leaving his throat, “Good girl, treating me so well.” The praise got to you and had you rubbing your thighs together, taking him as deep as you could and using your hand to stroke what wouldn’t fit in your mouth. You continued your actions for a few more minutes, enjoying the way Juns groans got louder and more desperate, but he quickly tugged on your hair to pull you away. “As good as your mouth feels baby girl, I’m getting close and I would rather finish inside you.” You felt your cheeks heat up at his comment but you nodded and allowed him to flip you both over. 

Jun took a moment to rid himself of his shirt as you got comfortable on the bed. He stepped away for a moment to grab something from the dresser before returning to you, with something hidden behind his back. “You trust me right?” he asked as he crawled on the bed with you. 

“Of course,” you replied with a soft smile. Jun returned the action and gently pushed you to lay down fully. 

“Good, now relax and put your hands above your head,” you immediately did as you were told, feeling the smooth silk run over your wrists before tightening around them. “Is that too tight?” he asked, watching you shake your head and nodding as he carefully tied your wrists to the headboard. He tugged on the knot for a moment to make sure it was sturdy before grabbing another silk tie and draping it over your eyes. “Still doing okay?’ he asked as he tied the silk behind your head. 

“Yeah I’m fine,” you assured, squirming softly at your now loss of vision. 

“Good, just let me know if it gets uncomfortable,” with that his hands were back to roaming your body. His large hands kneaded your breasts before moving down to play with your hips and thighs. You continued to squirm and moan at the contact, tugging lightly on your restraints. “You are so gorgeous,” he whispered, trailing kisses from your neck down to your breasts, “I always knew you were beautiful but your body is so perfect.” He placed kisses along your breasts before taking one of your nipples into his mouth. You shivered as you felt his fangs brush against your skin, his tongue swirling around your nipple as he sucked softly. Soft moans left you as he continued, gripping into your thighs as he switched to the other nipple. 

“Jun,” you whined out, making him hum against your skin. 

“Yeah baby? Do you need something?” there was a teasing edge to his voice that made you whine more.

“More, please touch me,” you begged. He chuckled softly and removed himself from your breasts.

“As you wish,” he muttered, one of his hands left your thigh to run a finger across your clothed core. You shivered at the feeling, grinding your hip into his hand to get more friction. “Shit, you are so wet for me,” he groaned as he pressed his finger harder against you. 

“Stop teasing me please!” you whined, desperate to feel more of his touch. 

“Fine, fine, because you’re being so good to me,” he agreed, slipping your panties off and spreading your thighs so he could get access to you. His finger trailed against your slit, gathering your wetness before pressing his finger into you. You moaned and squirmed softly, not used to the intrusion.  “Just relax,” Jun cooed, “it’ll feel weird at first but I promise it’ll be worth it.” You nodded and did your best to relax, squirming and gasping as you felt his finger move inside of you. Jun pressed a kiss to your thigh as he continued, curling his finger and making you whine as he hit that special spot inside of you. “Found it,” he muttered, continuing to hit that spot and watching as you squirmed and moaned at the feeling. Slowly he urged another finger into you, curling them and making a scissoring motion to help stretch you out. The sting burned a bit but that was quickly washed out by the pleasure he was bringing you, constantly hitting your G spot and his thumb moving to rub at your clit. “How are you feeling Y/N?” he asked, not slowing down his motion. 

“So good, it feels so good!” you moaned out, arching your back and pulling at your restraints. 

“Good,” Jun muttered as he pulled his fingers out, “are you ready for more then?” You didn’t hesitate to nod, practically shaking in anticipation as you felt him line up with your entrance. You arched your back and groaned as you felt him slowly enter you, his hands gripping your waist and soft pants leaving him. Jun stilled once he bottomed out, kissing you and muttering praises while massaging your hips to distract you from the pain. It took a moment to adjust to the stretch, but the second you felt it fade you were nodding at him to continue. His thrusts started off slow, simply letting you get used to the feeling before picking up the pace. You couldn’t hold back your moans as you felt him inside you, wrapping your legs around him to hold him closer to you. Juns grip on you tightened and he groaned as his thrusts continued. “You are so tight, you feel so good,” he grunted as his head dropped to rest against your neck. With each thrust you felt a tightening in your stomach, whining and squirming more as you realized you wouldn’t last much longer. 

“Jun I’m gonna..” you couldn’t find your words as you lost your breath. Jun seemed to understand though as you felt him nod against your neck. Without slowing his thrusts, he reached up with one hand and undid your blindfold, brushing your hair out of your eyes as you blinked up at him. 

“Go ahead and cum for me baby,” he groaned, that was the approval you needed to finally let go. You tightened around Jun and arched your back with a soft cry as your orgasm washed over you. Jun slowed down for a moment before continuing his movements, making you whimper from overstimulation. “Hold on for me just a little bit longer okay?” he urged, “I won’t last much longer. You’re going to be good for me though right? You’re going to let me give you my heir?” You couldn’t verbally reply, simply nodding and whining. Jun thrusted a few more times before stilling inside of you, a low groan left him as he reached his climax. 

You both panted softly as you came down from your high,  Jun carefully pulling out and leaving gentle kisses across your face and neck. “How are you feeling?” he asked as he untied you, massaging the soft red marks on your wrists as you sighed. 

“That was amazing,” you gasped out, staring up at Jun with a tired smile, “but I’m exhausted now.” He smiled and laughed softly, kissing your head as he climbed off the bed. 

“You stay here, I’m going to grab something to clean up with and then we can rest okay?” you gave him a hum of confirmation and closed your eyes. Jun disappeared into the bathroom for a moment before returning with a wet cloth. He hovered over you and gently wiped down your neck and chest before folding it and gently pressing it against your core. You sighed at the cool feeling against your sore body, letting Jun clean you with no hesitation. Once you were clean he quickly cleaned himself off before setting the rag aside and crawling into bed with you. You immediately crawled under the covers and snuggled up against Jun, with your head on his chest and his arm over you. “You’ll probably be pretty sore tomorrow, so if you want to stay in bed I’m not opposed,” he mused, chuckling when you weakly hit his chest. 

“We’ll see,” you muttered, “right now though I just want to sleep.”

“As you wish,” he agreed, kissing your head as he snuggled up with you. 

“I love your kisses by the way,” you whispered, placing a kiss on his heart before closing your eyes. 

“I’m glad,” he hummed, “it took a lot of effort for me to get them, you know?”

“I know, and you will still need that effort,” you teased, hearing him scoff. 

“We’ll see about that,” he placed one last kiss on your head before closing his eyes, “rest well my love.”

“Goodnight Qinqin.”

At this point it was safe to say, you had fallen in love with Wen Junhui. 

↪ Vampire Kisses Release Taglist: @eli-ljkh @foxdaisy @honeyhuii @kpxpseoul @knucklesdeepmingi @kmoon  @woohoney @kimsabinaskzlover @meowjunhui @blizzardfluffykpop @d-noona​ 

↪ Authors Notes: Qinqin means dear one or kiss 

Also I’ve been considering doing a spinoff of this story where reader ends up with Minghao instead of Jun, would anyone be interested in that? 

[the-au-thor]

A la Velocidad de la Luz (at the Speed of light) | Steve Harrington x Fem!Reader

Hello! I just wrote something for my Steve Harrington people out there. I hope you like it

TW: read this!

word count: 9.1k

Synopsis: They're friends, they're not idiots, and yes, they're falling in love. Let's dive a little bit into the friendship between this two and get to know Steve's love language

It's not like I got inspiration in this song by Los Bunkers and you should totally listen to it

Part 2

Steve had totally recognized the symptoms the minute he saw you that Friday Movie night.

After the gnarly events you've all been through, it was obvious you have formed a bond, a bond that would bring together the fancy house on the fancy side of town with the humble trailer in the trailer park on the wrong side of the tracks. A bond that would unite ages, circumstances, and tastes without discrimination, gathering a group of people religiously every Friday to eat popcorn and watch some horror movie. Then you'd all crash for the night because for some reason, nobody wanted to split up or be apart from each other. You needed each other to keep on living, and it wasn't something you would readily admit to in unison. It was more like a tacit agreement, and everyone was perfectly okay with it. The ongoing practice of cohabitation had made Steve more perceptive, somehow discovering that he enjoyed taking care of others, and griping about it was just part of a ritual where Dustin would have to go somewhere while pretending that Steve and only Steve could take him, and then, after grumbling, repeating that he wasn't his babysitter and whining, he'd grab his keys and take him wherever the kid desperately wanted to be. He could predict stomachaches when the kids stuffed themselves with sweets and be there with antispasmodic drops and chicken soup. He could also intervene in a bar fight at The Hideout just in time to prevent them from ruining the night when Corroded Coffin was playing and to keep them from calling Hopper for no reason. He had been there for Robin, Nancy, Argyle, and even Jonathan and each of the kids. Maybe that's why Hopper had suggested the Police Academy. Maybe that's why he felt like all of you were largely the reason he wasn't that lost kid with a terrible social life anymore and didn't know what to do with his life. You glanced at him with a half-smile right in the middle of the break to hit the bathroom that Nancy had instituted after Dustin suffered a urinary tract infection because he preferred to hold it in rather than miss out on Freddie's massacres.

"What's up?" you asked, popping a handful of popcorn into your mouth as you looked at him straight on.

Steve didn't know you much before the catastrophic events in Hawkins brought you together. You were buds with Robin at school, worked alongside Nancy on the school paper, but you said you never had the same reporter spirit as Nance; you just liked to write, and you thought being a member of the school paper would look dope on your resume once you applied to college. There was a time when you and he bumped into each other at some parties because Vicki's twin brother, Justin Carmichael, was trying to convince you to go out with him. He remembered that afterward, Justin had been complaining for a week because you hadn't even had the decency to let him get to first base at the best party in school. Inside, Steven was relieved it turned out that way; Justin Carmichael was a big asshole. Just as much of an asshole as he used to be back then. After you graduated, you both ran into each other when he was at Scoops Ahoy and you visited Robin at the ice cream shop, that time Hawkins was in danger -AGAIN-, and they barely even counted it -AGAIN-. You were going to Indiana University during the week, and you'd come back on weekends because unlike Steve, your parents were loving people who loved having you around and were genuinely interested in what you liked, explaining your concerned and always open personality. Steve didn't find it odd, anyway, not to have noticed you before you just abruptly entered his life as you did. The Steve from the past wouldn't have noticed someone like you because he was a selfish jerk; he'd proven it with Nancy, and he had to suffer a lot before he could prove to himself that he was much more than what his parents and old friends expected of him.

"Are you okay?" he asked then, listening to Lucas and Max's whispering kisses on one of the back couches.

Robin was making more popcorn in the microwave while Nancy filled her in on her long-distance relationship with Jonathan back when he was still living in California and how Robin could make it work as well with Vickie. Steve always knew they could handle the distance; it was just something Nancy and Jonathan would be able to make work. Dustin had gone to the bathroom, obviously, while Will mocked the silly argument Mike and Eleven were having, which was occasionally interrupted by Eddie to make a comment that would serve as an argumentative catapult to fuel the little dispute.

Your eyes stopped at Steve's in silence, and finally, you nodded.

"Sure," you replied. "Finally, vacation; I missed not having to pack my bags every weekend," you murmured with a smile, "and I'll be able to take a break from Professor Lewis's lectures."

Steve grimaced. "Is he still making it tough on you?"

You nodded. "Until the very last second of class, I really don't know how I'm going to survive this year if he keeps up with his hate campaign, I don't know what I did to him."

Steve frowned.

"There are people like that, you know? Bitter. Maybe he's jealous because you're so talented," Steve saw you scrunch your nose and let out a snort of laughter.

"He's a writer for The Times, jealous?" Steve shrugged.

"Maybe he sees in you something he can never be," he explained easily, "it's not uncommon for adults to project onto younger ones and make them pay for it."

Again, you studied him in silence. You took another popcorn into your mouth just before speaking. "And how's your dad taking you being the first one in the academy?" you asked.

Steve let out a small snort.

"Oh, he's thrilled. Especially because Hopper seemed to be his nemesis in school when they both belonged to the same basketball team," Steve drank from his Coca-Cola can, taking two big swigs big enough to make his mouth no longer feel dry.

You smirked ironically. "Ah, well, speaking of adults projecting…"

Steve nodded, watching you rummage in your purse for your pills. He remembers the first time he saw you show them to everyone, explaining what they were; it was right after closing the portal once and for all. The government had put them up in fancy hotel rooms while you all took care of cleaning up Hawkins and the reputation Eddie had gained because of the serial killer they hadn't managed to subdue in the first place. You were safe; everything was finally okay. There wouldn't be any more interdimensional creatures flying, running, crawling, or floating around there thinking they could eat, scratch, possess, or kill whoever they encountered, but even when you knew it, you couldn't sleep.You have been there, ordering the most expensive food from the hotel and playing video games nonstop for twenty-four hours. For you, it really hit the limit when you saw Eddie spend three straight hours curled up in the fetal position on his bed without really sleeping. Steve saw you get up, turn off the kids' TV, and take the pasta tray away from Argyle. The kids didn't even have the energy to protest. You stood in the middle of the room in your hotel robe with weariness in your eyes.

"So,” you finally said, taking a bottle of medicine out of your purse. "I'm going to do something I shouldn't do, and you must promise not to tell your parents. And yes," you looked at Erica threateningly, "I'm specifically talking to you," you said and then began handing out a small white capsule to each of the kids except Erica, to whom you gave a bigger one, explaining that you wouldn't give her anything other than melatonin.

Dustin sniffed the pill and then looked at you curiously.

"And what's this?"

You glanced at Robin out of the corner of your eye and then at the rest.

"My sleeping pills. They're gentle, but I need them to sleep, which you haven't done for a long time, and you can't just keep ignoring that you can't fall asleep. So this is the deal; we're going to ignore the fact that I'm breaking the law with this, and everyone will take a dose, it's small. I won't tell you what it is, but definitely don't be alarmed if you taste a bitter flavor in your mouth," you explained gently. "And you must commit; everyone will go to the therapist as soon as we leave here because what happened isn't normal, and you need help."

Eddie accepted the deal without thinking, sat on the bed, and swallowed the capsule without a second thought. After that, he opened his bedclothes and wished everyone good night. You watched the kids take the pills after promising to go to therapy. Steve remembers helping you and Robin turn off the lights and dim the night lamps as you watched everyone settle into whatever corner of the room they could claim and cover themselves with blankets to try to sleep.

"I didn't know you needed those sleeping pills," Steve piped up in the dark when the snores kicked in. Robin was out cold smack dab in the middle of us, snoring up a storm, her face finally looking peaceful and carefree.

Steve had seen the danger lurking in your eyes before, the fear, the terror, the concern, but that night was the first time he caught a glimpse of this new emotion; it was like an internal retreat to pain being reflected in your irises. For a moment, you diverted your gaze, avoiding Steve's, before nodding.

"I started having panic attacks at fifteen. Got diagnosed with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder," you confessed. "Had too many sleepless nights, screwed up my school game, messed with my emotions and reactions," you whispered matter-of-factly, but Steve could sense there was a lot of pain behind those words. "It was rough at first, but trust me, with supportive peeps and solid therapy, it's worth it. And these pills? They're tame compared to what I had to down initially. Missed two weeks of school and just slept” you nodded, letting out a stifled yawn, and Steve couldn't resist but follow suit as fatigue weighed heavily on his eyelids.

"Thanks for letting me in on that. You're tough, you know?" he responded, his words already starting to slur with sleepiness.

Your arm slinked over Robin, and your hand found its way to Steve's arm, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"Night, Steve," you murmured softly before drifting off into slumber.

You only needed one pill back then.

"Two?" Steve asked, furrowing his brow as he watched you down both capsules quickly, chasing them with a gulp of water as he nodded.

"Yeah, been having some trouble with the meds," you explained with a shrug. "Now that I'm free,I'm gonna see the doc and see how it goes."

Steve's expression clouded with worry. "Want some company?"

You took another sip of water, already formulating a quick response in your mind. "And have you wait around for an hour while my psychiatrist has me spillin' my guts in his office? Thanks, but I won't do that to ya."

"It wouldn't be a bother," Steve settled back on the couch, eyeing you. "But the offer's there."

You smiled, genuine gratitude shining through. "Thanks."

You and Steve watched Eddie make his way towards the TV as Dustin settled in next to Steve. Will nestled back on the floor, leaning against your legs as he always did. Steve had noticed, subtly since you and he met, that you two had formed a bond. Sometimes he caught glimpses of you two in your car, sharing ice cream and jamming out to tunes. When no one was looking, or so you thought, Will would lean towards you, and you'd start braiding his hair with a smile. Steve wondered if Will might have a bit of a crush on you, and you just didn't realize what was brewing there. Maybe he should chat with you about it; he wasn't sure if letting the kid catch feelings was good for him. The lights dimmed once more, the movie rolling on, and Eddie plopped down between you and Steve. Eddie shot his friend a sly look, knowing Steve was perfectly comfy where he was before. Steve rolled his eyes at Eddie and decided it was best to focus on the movie, but even in the tensest moments, he couldn't help but cast concerned glances at you; you'd taken your sleeping pills, yet you didn't seem to be yawning or preparing to nod off on Eddie's shoulder or curl up in the corner of the couch.

The next morning, you were the first one up, showered and clad in your athletic shorts, oversized Clash T-shirt as you whipped up breakfast for the sleepyheads still sprawled and tangled on the couch and rug, snoring away. Nancy was the second to join you, followed by Robin and Argyle. Steve then roused himself, greeting the ones awake, and headed to his room to grab a quick shower before joining them. While Nancy whipped up waffles, you manned the eggs, so Steve filled the coffee maker with his old man's favorite brew, which he never touched because he was hardly ever home.

"Wouldn't it be better if they woke up?" Nancy queried. "I mean, they were the ones hellbent on going to the lake for a swim."

Argyle snagged a piece of crispy bacon and started munching on it. "Sis, it's vacay, you can't go all dictator on 'em. When they're ready, they'll wake up."

Nancy snorted but didn't argue with his logic; instead, she piled the waffles onto a plate and leaned against Steve's kitchen island, eyeing you.

"You doin' alright?" she inquired.

You had been quiet, focused on the eggs as you stared into the pan with a distant gaze. You nodded, flipping the eggs before cutting the heat. You turned to Nancy with a smile.

"I'm good," you replied. "You been dealing with school drama?" you asked, catching Nancy's eye roll.

"I swear, if I get stuck with one more group of knuckleheads for a project, I'm gonna lose it," Nancy grumbled under her breath, eliciting a chuckle from Eddie, lounging between the cushions.

"Come on, Wheeler," he laughed. "We've worked together, and it's been smooth sailing, what could be worse?"

Robin sauntered over, tossing her threadbare cardigan—ridden with holes courtesy of Eddie's antics, claiming it looked "metal." It landed over Eddie's face and Robin shot him a look with arched eyebrows.

"You got no modesty, Munson?"

Steve chuckled as he poured coffee into a couple of mugs.

"Yeah, man, what's with the strip show in the dead of night?"

Eddie struggled to dress until he finally managed to awkwardly clamber up from the couch.

"Well, next time, you get to share a couch on a sweltering summer night with Henderson, what’ya think, pretty boy?" he griped before shooting Dustin a glare, who was still sound asleep with his mouth agape. Eddie tossed a blanket at him with force. "Wake up!"

Dustin startled awake, only easing when he saw everyone was fine and the worst thing that happened was a slobber stain on one of the sofa cushions in Steve's parents’ living room. He shuffled over to the couch, snagging the marked cushion and grimacing at it. Steve’s brows furrowed, mouth twisted in a disgusted grimace.

"Dude, this couch is worth a fortune. My mom's gonna flip when she sees this," he protested, lobbing the pillow back at Dustin, who was unapologetic about the incident, even wearing a smug smile, if anything.

Steve's house was a flurry of activity for the next few minutes; utensils clinked against dishes, and Steve’s parent will definitely notice those scratches Eddie left behind from trying to cut the bacon on his plate. You washed up everything each one of you used because, according to Nancy, it was better to leave everything clean, or else no one would have the energy to do it later. Robin, Steve, and you followed her orders because they weren't about to argue with someone like Nancy Wheeler. Argyle, Eddie, and Jonathan dried everything off and stowed it away while the kids geared up for an afternoon at the lake. When you arrived, you settled into lounge chairs and giant towels while most of the kids bolted for the water. Steve watched as you made the rounds, armed with a bottle of sunscreen, making sure everyone got slathered up on their backs, arms, faces, and shoulders, even though Mike protested about his fair, skinny skin. The rest splashed around for a while, indulged in ice creams, and even had a few impromptu swimming races where Steve had to fake a cramp so Dustin could finally win. Steve didn't realize, but you noticed, and you observed the little event with an amused grin. Steve wasn't the type to talk about feelings in front of a crowd out of the blue; that was more Eddie's style. He wouldn't stand in the middle of a bonfire and pour his heart out, declaring his undying love for everyone, but he had to admit moments like these made him feel damn happy. He'd always been a lone wolf trying desperately not to fit in but he never realized it was an issue until he met all of you, and it was something he could dig while the sun was still shining big and warm near the horizon. The kids were splashing around in the water with Robin, Eddie, and Argyle. Jonathan and Nancy were chilling a bit further away, exchanging kisses and small talk. You gave Will a hug and a kiss on the cheek, then playfully messed up his hair, making him laugh and shove you back. After that, you splashed water in his face before swimming off towards the lake shore. When your feet hit the stones, you strolled over to the stretched-out towel next to Steve with a smile and threw yourself onto it to soak up the sun. Steve looked as you adjusted your hair to the side, watching the little drops dance across your skin before disappearing or evaporating. Quietly, you quickly cracked open one of the books you always have with you, diving into its pages. He saw your fingers flick across the pages and your tongue peek out between your lips in concentration. He half-smiled and settled onto his towel, soaking in the warmth of the sun with a relaxed sigh.

"Can you imagine a dude with a freaky sense of smell going all psycho and killing a bunch of virgin girls to get their essence?" you broke the silence without taking your eyes off your book.

Steve arched a brow, somewhat amused. "Nah, I mean, we've seen worse stuff to not picture a human killing others," he replied sarcastically, earning a small, amused chuckle from you.

"Fair point," you replied, licking your finger to turn the page.

Steve cleared his throat, shifting on his towel, and turned to you, feeling a bit uneasy. "Hey, I think you should watch out for Will."

That made you glance up from your book, peering at him over your shades. Steve could sense the intensity of your gaze even though he couldn't see your eyes directly.

"Why? Has he been sniffing around and plotting murders?" Steve furrowed his brow.

"What? No! What are you talking about?" he asked, bewildered.

You left the book resting on your stomach to give him your full attention.

"Oh, it's just that we were chatting about the book, and then you brought up Will… but never mind, explaining a joke is lame, right?" you laughed, then sighed, suddenly feeling awkward. "What's up with Will?"

Steve scratched the back of his neck, trying to respond tactfully. Internally, he regretted starting that conversation without thinking it through first.

"I dunno. I just think maybe he's catching feelings for you… and it's not your fault, you're just nice to him," he cut himself off, trying to clarify his point, "…it's just that he might be getting the wrong idea…"

You lowered your shades a tad to meet his gaze directly.

"So, you're saying Will Byers might have a little crush on me?" you asked with a measured tone, leaving no room for misinterpretation.

Steve squirmed, shoulders shifting as he scratched his nose, eyes darting away from yours.

"It's possible," was his only response. "I mean, it's not the first kid who has a crush on an older girl, y'know?" Older girl. You gave him a calm smile, picking your book back up to resume reading.

"Will doesn't have a crush, Steve. At least, not on me; trust me, I'd know," you reassured him gently, giving Steve one last look. "Seriously."

Steve didn't know, but you understood his concern all too well. There was a reason why you and Will were so close, and why your bond had grown stronger lately, and it had as much to do with Will's feelings as it didn't. It wasn't something you could explain too much; it was something that belonged to Will, not to you. You'd noticed a change in Will for a few months now, even before they moved to California, but you weren't close friends; you'd only tutored the kid a couple of times, and that wasn't enough to butt into his life. When the Byers returned to town, Will was even quieter, more withdrawn, even when he was with the whole crew. You couldn't help but worry, especially on the day Joyce came to you, asking for an hour of your weekends to help Will with his English essays; he was starting to get more and more distracted, Joyce's super-mom side wanted to step in, but her more rational side said to give him time to readjust. That talk had you worried all week until Saturday came and you saw for yourself the kind of distraction in Will's gaze. He wasn't just somewhere else, far from the room where you both tried to finish the essay the teacher had assigned to help him get his English back on track; no, he was deep inside himself, locked in some cell with the door wide open, but he was too comfortable and scared of the world outside to step out. You remember spotting an old school project he made in California, hidden away and dusty under a pile of canvases with sketches of massive dragons and knights in armor. The project was about Alan Turing; the dedication in that work caught your eye, and you dusted it off to showcase its potential. When you slid it in front of him, you told him that's the Will you wanted to see at school; you saw his eyes well up with tears, and you knew something else was weighing on him. Then you set aside the task, sat beside him, and took his hands. You promised to keep anything he told you discreet, then he started speaking. You'd never heard Will talk so much, and you were shocked as you listened to every word, how well he'd hidden his turmoil, and the loneliness creeping in. He was just a kid and he was facing his first heartbreak, and worse; you couldn't promise it'd be his last, he had it rough, and his road ahead would be bumpy. Since that day, you'd made sure to be there for whatever he needed, even planning a trip to the MET together to get him hyped about art. You were the baby sister in your family, you had three older brothers and you never knew what it was like to look out for someone else until you met the boys, and it brought you joy to make sure everyone was alright, especially making sure Will had a good summer with his friends and that his heart would heal, with hopes that a good boy would come along someday to help him pick up the pieces and mend all the crap he might face.

It was pretty late when they decided to head home. They dropped the kids off at the Wheelers', where they'd be crashing for a sleepover. Eddie invited you all to catch one of his Corroded Coffin rehearsals at the Hideout, and you were about to accept along with Jonathan, Nancy, Argyle, and Robin, but Steve put his hand on your shoulder with a grin and said you had plans. For a sec, you looked at him confused, but a gentle squeeze on your side from him convinced you to play along. They bid the kids farewell outside the joint, and you climbed into Steve's car, curious. You saw him wait for both of you to buckle up before asking what he had planned.

"I thought we could do something, just you and me."

A date? You wondered innocently, Steve Harrington and you hanging out without the rest? You could only think of one time you'd decided to do something together. Once, you brought cookies to the Academy; he'd aced all his workouts, but his parents didn't even bother to pat him on the back. You and the rest planned a party for him to celebrate, but you wanted to do something special because you were hella proud. You baked his fave cookies (crunchy with cinnamon, caramel, and peanuts) and met him at lunchtime; apparently, they were just showering because his hair was still a bit wet at the ends. He was rocking shorts and a tank top, sweat glistening on his skin, cheeks flushed from exertion. He had a lil' towel draped 'round his neck as he dabbed his forehead. You were waiting for him in the lobby, standing up with a grin plastered on your face. You remember your cheeks hurting like hell, the slight ache nagging at you that night when intrusive thoughts came knocking uninvited, making you wonder if you looked like a loon.

"What's this?" Steve asked with a half-smile and a curious look as you held out a box.

"Congrats for passing your test," you replied, watching as Steve's expression shifted, a mix of sadness and gratitude, then he hugged you out of nowhere. You and him hugged before, especially after some close call that put their lives at risk, but this hug was different, more intimate. He rested his chin on your shoulder, rubbing your back tenderly. You heard him sigh softly, murmuring his thanks. After you and Steve pulled apart, you still on your toes and he with his hands on your shoulders, your eyes locked for a moment, and you felt like something was left unsaid, but it happened so fast you didn't have time to question it. You never talked about it again. You hadn't swung by the academy again, even though you had more than one reason to. For some reason, you felt like you needed to guard yourself, so you'd avoided being alone with Steve or making excuses to see him without the kids around. When you arrived at his house , you felt something strange stirring inside you. Maybe Steve caught your furrowed brow or your hesitation to step out of his ride and cautiously scoped out the entrance, because he walked over to your door and popped it open with a smile that somehow put you at ease.

"I gotta show you something inside," he announced, extending his hand toward you, offering it up for your trust.

You half-smiled, unsure how to react. You didn't know whether to feel pure curiosity or straight-up unease. You took his hand and follow him to the entrance. He didn't let go; he held onto your hand and occasionally traced circles on your palm, as if he knew exactly how to calm your jitters.

Inside the house, it looked just as you left it, except for some cushions outta place on Steve's parents fancy sofa. Steve kept his steps leading you upstairs. As you ascended, you checked out the family pics Steve's mom had hung on the wall. One was snapped in a studio with a basic blue backdrop adorned with clouds, featuring a smiling baby decked out in sailor threads. You smiled then; that baby was Steve. "Did you want siblings?"

As you hiked up the stairs in silence, Steve shot you a curious glance, and then nodded.

"Yeah, actually, but my folks shut down production very soon. My dad blames it on my mom, but we all know it's on him," he responded.

You made a face, recalling the one time you'd seen Steve's dad. He seemed distant, preferring it that way; he introduced himself as "Mr. Harrington," and you were pretty sure he'd adopted it as his first name. He seemed like the type to pin his own infertility on his wife.

"I always wanted little siblings" you murmured, lightly tracing your index finger over the wood. "Feels like I got them now."

"Yeah, some real pests," Steve grumbled, coming to a halt in front of a closed door, eyeing you.

You nervously smiled. I mean, with him looking at you like that, what were you supposed to do? You shrugged. "It ain't all bad," you murmured, eyes darting impatiently between the door and Steve's relaxed demeanor. You didn't see him like this often; he had that look that seemed to peer into your soul with those huge brown eyes. He slipped into the room, being all suspicious, and after a minute, he emerged, shutting the door behind him.

"I got somethin' for ya on the other side of this door," he said without giving you a chance to process how odd that might be because he knocked on the wooden surface and pushed it open, revealing the guest room of his enormous house. Inside, blackout curtains shielded the huge windows that overlooked the Harringtons' backyard.

You were struck by the scented candles and the distant sound of the sea emanating from some speakers by a massive, fluffy bed piled with cushions and pristine, crisply-stretched sheets. You looked at Steve with a mixture of confusion and fun.

"Could you at least invite me for a coffee first, Steve…?" you quipped, trying to dispel the slight unease creeping up your spine.

Steve half-smiled, giving a weak chuckle. "If I were goin' that route, I'd spring for somethin' a bit fancier than a brew; give me some credit," he played along, entering the room and picking up a neatly folded outfit from his hands. "No, babe; this is an intervention plan."

With your feet still lingering in the doorway, you arched an eyebrow, perplexed.

"Intervention for what?"

"Glad you asked," Steve said, handing you the folded clothes; the soft fabric of the pajama set brushed against your fingers as you wondered what all this was about. "I'll get the tub runnin'. My mon left this stash of bath salts that supposedly turn you into a new human; so, enjoy the bath, Slip into these PJs, then come down for dinner and after that, off to bed, and I don't wanna hear from you until at least tomorrow at noon ."

You frowned. "Steve; What…?" You shook your head quickly, trying to dispel the confusion as if by magic. "I don't get it."

Steve placed his hands on your shoulders, meeting your gaze squarely. "You haven't been getting proper sleep for months; you ain't fooling me. You said it's just sleep trouble, but I know it's deeper; you've been mega stressed, and when that happens, insomnia kicks in, panic attacks, negative vibes, and the urge to be completely alone. I've seen it; so let's try sidestepping that, and for that, I've whipped up a sleep bomb. I just need your cooperation, can I count on that?"

You studied him, trying to read him in return. You were surprised Steve had clocked your distress signals. You hadn't wanted to tip off anyone, not even your parents who'd been through it all before. You didn't want to put them through it; you didn't want to tell them that during your college days, when you weren't studying or dodging Mr. Lewis' attempts to fail you out of spite, all you could think about was returning to Hawkins; to be with them, your friends, your fam. You didn't want to confess that you'd revisited that dark place where you wondered, during those long, sleepless nights, how it would feel to just snooze forever and wake up when everything hurt less. Every so often, your mind dragged you there; you knew they were bouts triggered by high stress, and you knew they'd pass, but not knowing when or how long it'd last was another torture on your plate. You hadn't needed to voice your cries for help for Steve to come through was both surprising and scary. Surprising because you didn't think he'd notice; he was busy running the mansion his parents barely occupied, looking after the kids, and navigating the rigors of the academy while trying to fend off the hordes of newfound fans who were back to fawning over him. Would there even be room for you in his schedule? You knew you were friends, but honestly, you'd hung out more often with Nancy, Robin, and Eddie—shopping, hitting the movies, catching gigs—than with Steve on a single aimless stroll downtown. Among your friends, Steve was honestly the last person you'd figured would clock your silent pleas for help. And yet here he was, front and center; at some point, he'd carved out time to spruce up a whole room, light candles, have a bed that screamed comfort, and a silky PJ set just for you. It felt like your lungs swallowed all the air in the room, and oxygen only reached you for a fragile, feeble thank you that stumbled out haltingly. Steve seemed to appreciate that sliver of gratitude, and something in his eyes softened for a beat. He gave your shoulders a gentle squeeze before leaving you to run the taps, filling the tub with glorious hot water that soon had you melting into bliss and your muscles thanking the heat. You tilted your head back as your toes curled in delight. You were pretty sure the salts hadn't done much beyond a certain softness on your skin, but the pleasant aroma had managed to unwind you. When you decided it was time to get out, mainly because the water had cooled and your fingers were pruney, you dried off and slipped into the comfy satin Pijama, a lovely mahogany color that smelled of detergent and fabric softener.

It was pure bliss; that's what you thought as you descended the stairs and found the table set with iced tea, a salad, and two plates brimming with bolognese pasta.

Steve didn't know how to cook much else; his waffle game was weak, and his scrambled eggs were always overdone. But if there was one thing Steve Harrington could nail, it was a homemade pasta dish. You couldn't figure out why he'd never flexed that culinary muscle with his dates; you were sure by now Steve Harrington was off the market for a good long while. Part of you, a part you tried not to dwell on too much, wished that sliver of Steve that only you and the rest of the group knew would remain under wraps. Then you felt guilty for even wishing that; you knew Steve felt lonely and wanted to find someone, and as you twirled pasta onto your fork, you knew he deserved it, because the pasta was divine, and because he'd taken the time to make it himself.

You would've kept munching, but you knew it'd be greedy. Steve rose and led you to bed, rattling off a laundry list of reasons why you wouldn't be lifting a finger, starting with the fact that you were caught up in a smartly orchestrated intervention by him.

"What's up?" Steve asked as you settled under the covers of the bed and the reality hit you.

"Every night I give this a shot, Steve; trying to calm, close my eyes, and just sleep, and I really wanna now but I just can't…"

Steve rubbed his nose, nodding, plopping down beside you, all ears.

"Look at yourself," he murmured. "You're stressing about not being able to sleep, and that's why it ain't happening." You shook your head. "It's not that, really, Steve. It's just that I know myself; I know, and it's frustrating. You have no idea how many nights I've spent staring at the ceiling, feeling like my body just needs to move. It's practically physically impossible for me to lie in bed, no matter how comfy it is."

"Alright," Steve nodded thoughtfully. "I have an idea. Remember when we were keeping watch to make sure Vecna didn't snatch Max at the Wheeler's house?" You nodded. "Yeah, Dustin never shut up, and God knows I couldn't shut him up myself, so I just resigned myself to having to listen to his annoying voice for the rest of the night, and then boom! I woke up, and it was morning."

You raised your eyebrows, surprised. "You fell asleep on your watch to keep an eye on Max?"

"Hey, Henderson was still awake, and nothing went down, right?"

You opened your mouth, astonished. "Something could've gone down, Steve."

"But it didn't!" he retorted, letting out a sheepish laugh and trying to defend himself. "But that's not the point. The point is, I fell asleep," you rolled your eyes, crossing your arms while still sitting on the bed. Steve must've recognized that you looked adorable trying to scold him for his irresponsibility. "Listening to Dustin's voice, I slept like a baby all night."

You raised an eyebrow, finally getting it.

"Are you telling me that all this time, I've just needed Dustin's voice to sleep soundly?"

"No," he replied, pointing his finger at you with a victorious grin. "My voice, babe, my voice will make you sleep like a rock tonight." He then got up and gestured for you to lie down in bed. You looked at him, suppressing a laugh. "What?"

"Nothing."

"Look, now you find it funny, but when you wake up in the morning feeling rested, I'll have the decency not to tell you it was thanks to me."

You smiled, adjusting your hair to the sides.

"Oh, Steve, thank you so much, how considerate of you," you laughed, but the laughter was immediately stifled when you saw Steve start to settle down next to you in bed. He lay on his side and rested his head on his palm to look at you. "What are you doing?"

"I'm just gonna lie down next to you and talk to you. The only rule is that you can't speak; you'll close your eyes and listen to my voice."

Bossy.

You nodded silently and closed your eyes. You heard Steve sigh but didn't look at him again; after all, he had gone to all this trouble, so you would cooperate. You would do your part.

Then Steve began to talk. He spoke for at least an hour about his life, his folks, and what he wanted to do in the future when he graduated as a cop and started taking care of this town again, with Hopper as his boss. Damn it, it would be tough following the old man's orders, but he'd take it on. He didn't stop even when your intermittent breathing became a steady rhythm that could only mean you were finally catching some sleep. Steve didn't stop looking at you as he reached out to the speaker and lowered the volume of the ambient sound. He didn't stop even as the chirping of crickets seeped in from his backyard and formed a whispered melody along with the croaking of the frogs.

He couldn't stop looking at you.

Steve watched your eyelashes brush your cheeks. The air entering and exiting through your slightly parted lips as you breathed. He looked at your nose and traced imaginary lines on your face, following it with his gaze as if he were redrawing you. It wasn't fair that you couldn't rest, that it was so complicated for you. Steve had seen you sleep deeply in the most complicated places and under the most critical circumstances. You were perfect under pressure; something told him that you would prefer Vecna as an enemy than any internal demon that haunted your mind. He had seen more fear in your face when you thought that it would be another sleepless night than when one of the demodogs that attacked at Hopper's old cabin pinned you down with its weight and drooled over your face as if they were thinking about your taste even before taking a bite. Steve hit it right in the middle of its neck with his bat and didn't stop until Dustin told him it was more than dead, impaled against the wooden floor. He didn't know it then, but he would have killed any monster for you. Even the one that tormented you in your mind.

"Thank you," he finally spoke, stretching his other hand to caress your hair. "You've always taken care of us, and that's very little to say." He admitted, "I think you try to do it because you haven't managed to take care of yourself as you should." He whispered, removing a strand of hair that had floated over your face. "Relax; I'll do it."

You had made them all fulfill their promise in the hotel room that night with the sleeping pills. They had each been given a separate room, but trauma unifies, and they couldn't spend time apart; they all gathered in Eddie's room and spent hours together. After that, when things calmed down and they went through interviews with men dressed in black and serious looks, they went to a high-security clinic where Owen was waiting to give them a physical examination. None of the scars they had were completely healed; Eddie had to undergo skin grafts on his abdomen, and Max had to undergo rehabilitation to walk normally again.

"It's not enough," you had told Owen when he discharged them all with prescriptions for the best free medicine. The man raised his gaze from his folder to look at you through his glasses. "We need therapy."

"Kid…" Hopper spoke behind you with a tired voice, but you stopped him firmly.

"No," you turned to him and looked at Owen for a few seconds. "He smelled like a distillery even before the first attack of the first demogorgon," you reminded everyone. "How do you think he's going to be when all the adrenaline from this is gone? Hopper needs therapy. We all do. Max almost lost her sight; Eddie came back from the dead. You can't say everything is fine and send us back to a town where everyone will still judge us no matter what." Owen opened his mouth, but you weren't ready to stop talking. "You weren't there; you don't know what we had to go through. We don't even fully understand it ourselves; we literally avoided a dimensional catastrophe that wasn't our responsibility, Owen. They owe us."

The truth was, none of them except you thought therapy was a good idea. A monster had used their worst nightmares and traumas to get rid of them. They didn't want to have to open their hearts once a week to another stranger to take advantage of that. But you had been firm in making them all fulfill the commitment, and against all odds, they all agreed and completed their therapies as they should. Even Mike, who had shown extreme resistance to the heart-to-heart talk, had finally relented. You had won those kids over, Steve saw it. And he had to admit that was part of the reason why he sometimes felt jealous. It was pathetic to admit it; an adult jealous of children. But damn it; he would feel good if one day one of the hugs you gave to Will Byers was meant to be given to him.

"You are going to a lot of trouble for her," Dustin told him the next morning as he rudely chewed on a raspberry. "Hey! Little human vacuum: stop eating someone else's breakfast; this isn't for us." "You see? This is what I mean! I could be planning a new D&D campaign that would surprise Eddie and have him kissing my ass for the next decade, but here I am helping you surprise a girl." "It's not to surprise her; she finally slept more than eight hours and needs to eat," Steve began to respond as he poured some of Robin's pancake mix onto the hot skillet. "And I remind you that I'm the one driving thousands of miles so you and your sexier-than-Phoebe-Cates girlfriend, a fact I highly doubt, can see each other. So I would appreciate it if you stopped eating her food and helped me with this as I asked." Dustin frowned but continued to add raspberries to the mix anyway. "You know? I always thought you and Robin had something," Steve rolled his eyes and snorted. "Then for a moment, I thought you and Nancy would get back together by the dumb way you kept looking at her. But now this makes more sense." Steve squeezed a drop of the splashed pancake mix onto his finger and brought it to his mouth. "Yeah? Why is that?" Dustin, focused on his work, shrugged. "When you and Robin are together, you joke around like you and me, Steve, and I refuse to think you're into me." Steve made a disgusted gesture. "Gross, dude, enough." "That, and when you looked at Nancy, you suffered, Steve; you were the most miserable, pathetic…" "Don't be so kind, you'll make me cry." "…sad, and depressed," Dustin ignored his friend, handing him the bowl full of pancake mix. "but with her, you're happy; you smile. You don't have to pretend to be cool all the time, and you actually talk to her. Plus, you take care of her, and that's good because you've been breathing down my neck for so long and acting like my mom. I didn't want to tell you, but you were suffocating me, and you finding a girlfriend would be great for my individuality, Steve." Steve flipped the pancake to let the other side brown while making a face. "I get it, Henderson, you need space, and I'll give it to you as soon as you finish helping me with the coffee and get out of here." Dustin scratched his nose and coughed. "Ass-hole." Dustin was right; you brought out the best in him. Steve could talk to you and not feel like he had to impress you all the time. You made his stomach flutter, but you didn't make him act like an idiot. It was too difficult for him to figure out whether what he felt with you was a friendship that was too strong or something more. He missed you the weeks you were studying at the University, and when you came back to Hawkins, you were never close enough to him.

"I think it would be a big step to go on dates with lots of girls that would end when you drop them off at their houses the next morning," Robin had told him one day while they were rearranging the movie shelves at Family Video after Steve told her about his plan. They had stood up after the earthquake, and Keith hadn't wanted anything to do with the business again. Steve and Robin decided to take over; having a business and extra money in their pockets wasn't bad. Max, Will, and Dustin took turns after school, and they had officially entered the workforce, earning some bills that they could later spend on whatever those little gremlins spent their money on now. "Robin, it's already weird enough to have an ex in your friend circle, two would be too many, and it's a risk I'm not willing to take." His best friend let out a mocking laugh. "Ding, ding, ding, ding, Dingus! you just admitted you like her." Obviously, Steve liked you, he thought now as he plated the pancakes after getting rid of Dustin and dispatching him to Eddie's house where they would plan their new campaign or something like that. Steve liked many things and people; otherwise, he wouldn't surround himself with them. The issue was figuring out what kind of feeling he had for you. It didn't help that everyone seemed to have it figured out except him. Besides, even if he did figure it out. What about you? What did you feel about him?

Steve was your damn hero, you thought as you stretched between the soft sheets of the most comfortable bed you had ever tried and opened your eyes after a huge and shameless yawn. You looked at the ceiling of the room, trying to contain your joy. You looked at the clock on the bedside table on one side of the bed and laughed softly when you saw it was exactly noon. You had slept for over twelve hours; that was more than you usually rested in a week at College. You raised a victorious fist and got out of bed to brush your teeth and freshen up a bit before heading downstairs and looking for Steve on the first floor. You found him squeezing the juice from an orange in his kitchen when he looked at you somewhat dismayed. You walked towards him with a smile and gave him a tight hug, burying your face in his chest and feeling him slowly return the hug.

"Thank you, Steve. I really rested," you moved away from him and looked around; on a tray were syrup, raspberry pancakes, and freshly scrambled eggs. "Did you make all this?" Steve scratched his neck, somewhat embarrassed. "Dustin came over for a while to help," he admitted, and then saw your rested face without being able to help but smile. "How nice of him," you said with a smile. If you had heard his string of complaints, you wouldn't find him so nice. But he wouldn't tell you that. "Are you hungry?" "Famished!" Steve saw the sparkle in your eyes; even your smile was different when you rested. As you chewed your breakfast with gusto and asked him about his graduation from the police academy, Steve observed you again carefully so you wouldn't notice it, partly because he didn't want you to think it was strange, but also because the little adrenaline rush he got from it was addictive. He didn't know what was going on: he had known you for years, you were never a point on his radar. He knew that if he tried hard enough, he could count the times you both talked in high school and would only need the fingers of one hand. You were never attractive to him enough to be his friend, let alone something more. It's true that if he tried to remember, he could say that you always had that pleasant smile and those huge eyes that seemed to read whoever they saw. You were also nice; you never paid special attention to Tommy and Carol, nor did it seem to matter to you to be part of the school's social hierarchy, nor did it seem to matter to you to be his friend even after the Hawkins attack. Although it's true that you were always kind, he couldn't say that they became friends until a year or two ago. Steve had lived a life without you; the curious thing was that now he found it hard to imagine the rest of his life without you in it.

Your heart seemed to ache. It was strange because you were happy, very happy; you had had a bath with aromatic salts, a good dinner, most importantly: a good rest and a delicious breakfast. But your heart hurt. Today was a good day, and you didn't want to be ungrateful, but you wouldn't have this forever; and you didn't talk about the shower, the food, or the, oh, comfortable bed the size of a Cadillac. No, this; to Steve. You couldn't help feeling that your happiness had an expiration date, and it was too soon. Your stomach hurt, your chest hurt, and your mind hurt. Anyway, you tried not to show it, and in the afternoon when Steve dropped you off at your house after vegging out in his living room eating the leftovers from the night before and watching comfort movies like The Breakfast Club and The Princess Bride, which Eddie had gotten in some non-legal but not illegal way since it had come out only a few months ago in theaters, you tried not to look at him too much or try to count the moles on his neck because it was real torture. He had looked at you with those eyes and smiled as he said goodbye to you. You saw him watching you until you entered your house and said goodbye with a wave one last time. He drove away in his car, and you stayed by the window because it was almost physically impossible to move away from there. "And then?" your mother's voice sounded behind you, which was the only thing that made you move. You turned to her still holding the bag with the soft pajamas that Steve had refused to let you return. "Steve told me his plan. Did you manage to sleep?" You nodded, and your mother approached to hug you while making little cries of joy. You hid your head in her neck and started crying, it took a couple of seconds before your mother noticed. Damn Steve Harrington and his consideration for telling his plan to your mother. Damn, damn it. "What's wrong?" your mom asked, worried, cradling your face. "I need help, Mom," you hiccupped, and the phrase was barely understandable. You saw your mother raise her eyebrows and nod. "Of course, but what's wrong? What do you feel?" You tried to breathe and put your hand on your chest. "F-fear" Your mother's expression softened, making her look younger when she seemed to understand what you meant. "Oh, no, sweetheart. No," she kissed your forehead and wiped your tears with a small consoling smile. "You're in love."

Yes, at least Steve had recognized the symptoms.

[waiting-makes-me-antsy]

Why the KOSA Bill Should Not Pass

tw: ab0rtion talk, assault mention, su1cide mention

also, credit to @the-realest-spot-conlon for getting this strike started. i've known about this bill for a while but until she talked about it, i hadn't really researched what this bill would have in store for the united states.

this will be a bit dark because this is sort of a speech against the KOSA bill and the bill basically wants to ban any talk of abortion, protesting and the LGBTQ+ community from kids under 16- WHICH the parents have no control over controlling what their child could see and the government would basically be saying:

"oh that's inappropriate" to say something like, idk, an inclusive video

and basically sort of brainwashing an entire generation

so yeah this will be a bit dark so don't read if you might be uncomfortable with the topics this sort of speech will have

(and this is directed at the government so when I say 'you' in the paragraphs it's towards the government)

[i removed the first part because it's a bit more personal and uh i dont think it should be shared here :sob]

And while it might seem a bit overexaggerated, it’s true. There are teenagers all over the united states, countries and the globe who face problems like these. And it’s not just verbal. No, there is physical violence and assault, hate crimes happening to students everywhere.

You might now be asking: “What does this have to do with the KOSA bill?”

I hate to say it but the internet has truly been my one and only friend I can ever count on. Who I always know has my back. The LGBTQ+ community doesn’t care if I’m not super skinny or if I have scars lining my arms. They support the fact I don’t really have any romantic feelings towards other people or really just romantic feelings in general. They make me feel normal. That it’s okay to not feel inclined to have and align with the normal gender rules. That I don’t have to follow the binary.

The internet is the only place I can analyze poetry and art deeply with different interpretations and analyzations of every single line, or every single stroke in a painting or word in a novel. Where I can freely talk about my new hyperfixation and no one will stare at me weirdly. Instead, they will respond with another essay.

They won’t say it’s “fucking sad” that I like to write essays in my free time- one of the only ways I can truly express myself because no one at school wants to hear me talk.

And it’s not just a safe place for me. No, it’s a place where everyone as a whole can express their rights and their thoughts. This is our future generation- our future leaders we’re talking about. If the only things that can make us realize what we need to change are censored, how will we ever be able to fix these problems that citizens make? 

Abortion laws. Yes I’m saying that. You want to censor any talk of abortion. What about all the innocent girls out there? Brutally assaulted and forced to ruin their career because they can’t get rid of a baby that’s not even developed yet. That doesn’t even have feelings or a brain yet. It’s just a tiny hint of life, not a fully classified human being yet. An embryo. And so now, they will have to face anxiety, depression, guilt, maybe even shame and ruin for the rest of their lives. 

They don’t have a free choice. But America is supposed to be freedom for the people! And here you are, taking away futures. Taking away future doctors, lawyers and even presidents. Just to save a cell inside their stomachs. Just to make them risk their lives giving a painful birth that will destroy their bodies. No brain, no feelings and no heartbeat. 

We need to know the wrongs in our world to stop them! To be able to protest against them! To be able to stand up for ourselves! So the older generations won't keep making votes that will ruin OUR futures.

Let’s look back at the first right for our states. Freedom of Speech. Huh, sound familiar to your bill? You want to take away protesting from the eyes of our future. From what can help them make the right decisions for our nation. So they can learn to lead. But no, you just want to raise mindless sheep that will bend to your will because they never had any exposure to what can help them break away. 

This bill will ruin lives. It will break apart the nation into pieces like a glass window broken by a bullet. Because if this bill passes, I bet you this: suicide rates will go up. Depression rates: up. Without the comfort of people who you actually connect to, isolation will take over your feelings and it just leads you into a downward spiral.

Imagine you’re a 13 year old who just watched their entire future torn to shreds by a bill signed. You just took their voice away. Their rights away. Possibly their entire life away. Consider that.

[yourtoradorasextendedwarranty]

You're Ignorant

This is going to be a lengthy post. Or I will manage to short form this.

So it does not matter if you are on the left or on the right in the United States. However, over the past 15 years, the prominence of this problem seems to happen far more frequently with those that vote for Democrats. IT DOES happen with republicans, but it's not as frequent or with the same fervor.

So public perception of Bills that go through the senate and the house is normally based on the name, or what the people putting the bill out tell you that it does. However since around the time of the Obama admin, bill drafted by democrats have been getting longer and longer and longer, so much so that they are massive enough to be wheeled out on a little red wagon.

Bills that are quite literally 100's if not 1000's of pages long. The reason people that are "Blue no matter who" voters actually piss me off is because they don't care if the bill actually kills people so long as the NAME is good. To paraphrase someone from a different post when this topic came up. "A bill could come out called the "Don't kick puppies act". And when it goes through the legislative, some republicans will vote against it, and then Democrats and the media will come out saying 'X amount of republicans want to kick puppies'. What they don't tell you is that on line 2 of the bill, it says it will send 2 billion dollars to Brazil to teach gay dance theory."

And that's the point. It's not about what the bill is called. It's not about what they WANT the bill to do. It is about what the bill will ACTUALLY do. What does it say? What are the legal implications? Does the legal jargon of the bill do something other than what is specified in bill? But it gets a little worse than that with all of this. Politicians lie. Not only do they tend to lie, they normally do it by misrepresenting intent. This can be seen with both parties as well but happens far more often with people that vote democrat because they are far easier to manipulate.

Take the "Don't say gay bill". It literally had nothing to do with talking about gay stuff. What it did disallow was talking about sexual identity and sexual orientation as a class discussion or part of a curriculum. Funny enough that also includes talking about being strait as a point of class discussion, or curriculum. People kept talking about use of pronouns but that had really nothing to do with the bill. What the bill was actually even created for was because a teacher, behind the back of the parents of the kid, started to transition a kid, after convincing the kid that she was trans. During the process, the kid was not getting mental or emotional health help at all. The teacher helped the kid get on hormones I believe and was aiming to find a way to help with surgeries but the teen girl tried to kill herself. After the parents found out what happened, they removed the kid from the school and started getting her mental health help.

After she started getting the help that she needed she pretty much came to realize that it was just a combination of (initially) mild depression, pressure from her peers and, pushing from the teaching and administrative staff that convinced her she was trans.

So yeah. THE BILL IN QUESTION called the "Parental Rights in Education Bill", had nothing to do with "Not saying gay". Hell the bill did not even stop kids from talking to teachers or counselors about being gay in private. IT DID however stop them from hiding important things about their kids from parents.

Fact of the matter is, just because a name of something is good, does not in any way imply that is good. Just because the democrats LIE and say that something "should be called" something, does not mean that it is. Or we can talk about the Restrict act. Which YES was the spawn of certain Republican lawmakers but had some support from the democrats as a Patriot Act 2.0. Ya know another bill that would strip more freedoms from us and remove more of our privacy. All under the guise of "Banning TikTok". Which I agree with only the ban.

Mostly because the app is a spyware app, that is causing legitimate mental illness in today's youth. That and the algorithm used for the US's version of the app is actually pretty damaging over all to people. More so with the sensationalism it tends to spread.

Long story short. If your preferred reps push a bill over 100 pages long, you MIGHT want to believe that you are being lied to about its contents. Or understand that what you are being told about it is not the whole truth.

Because fact of the matter is this. You might think Democrats have your best interest in mind and every bad thing is the fault of the "EVIL MAGA REPUBLIANS", but look at California and New York. Rampant homelessness. Removal of several safety offices. Policies that claim to help minority communities but hurt them more and more every day. And excess spending and misappropriation of funds. And both of these states have been under full rule of Dems for YEARS. Meaning that ZERO republican influence makes their laws. HELL, California I believe tried to remove their own discrimination laws so that companies in the state COULD IN FACT discriminate in hiring practices.

It's time you start looking past the names of things, and start look at intent. You start looking at effects. You start looking at the results of. Get your heads out of the sand, and stop being ignorant. Your pursuit of "doing good" "being inclusive" "spreading diversity" yeah all of that is normally damaged more and more every day by people like you because the Dems and Reps (at least 90% of them) don't give a shit about you and only make you believe that they do.

[beardedmrbean]

This one didn't feel like it should sit till Morning

NASHVILLE, Tenn. (WKRN) — The Nashville Jewish community is speaking out following a downtown demonstration on Saturday involving swastika flags and a group of people described by multiple lawmakers as “Nazis.”

News 2 spoke with the Anti-Defamation League (ADL) on Sunday, Feb. 18 to learn more about the group marching and possible affiliations.

Carla Hill, the senior director of investigative research for ADL’s Center on Extremism, believed the group was mostly composed of members of the extremist Blood Tribe group, but also had members of the Vinland Rebels, most likely to bolster numbers. She said the salutes, chants, and marching under swastikas were all signs indicative of the True Blood group. In addition, logos for both groups were reportedly visible.

The march on Saturday, Feb. 17 was just the latest form of hate speech the Nashville Jewish community has experienced in recent history. In 2023, the Sylvan Park community had several homes spray-painted with swastikas. That’s in addition to the antisemitic flyers the Jewish Federation of Greater Nashville has seen distributed around the community, as well as rising reports of problems for Jewish children in area schools.

PREVIOUS: Lawmakers react to group of ‘Nazis’ marching through downtown Nashville

“Not only Metro Nashville, but also Williamson County, Rutherford County, Sumner County, all of those areas where children are verbally attacked and sometimes even physically attacked,” said Deborah Oleshansky, the community relations director for the Jewish Federation of Greater Nashville. 

According to the ADL, Tennessee saw 290 hate speech-related incidents last year.  

Another concern is the rise of sub-divided extremist groups, such as the Blood Tribe and Goyium Defense League, which the Jewish Federation reported seeing advertised on flyers distributed locally. 

“It is new for some of us from a certain generation to suddenly feel threatened in a way that we know our parents and grandparents felt threatened, but which we often really hadn’t felt until fairly recently,” Oleshansky said.  

Antisemitism and safety fears surge among US Jews, survey finds

Local Jewish leaders said social media has largely united and given a voice to these extremist groups and has led to an increase in propaganda spreading. Oleshansky challenged extremists to take a critical look at the messages being shared within these groups.  

“We are a tiny minority that could not possibly be in control in the way that they want to think that we are in control, and even if we were, the things we would want to be doing are things that they would probably want also, because our tradition teaches to take care of each other, to build strong community, to be in community, to help each other, to take care of our neighbors,” Oleshansky said. 

Oleshansky said the Jewish Federation felt the community’s support following Saturday’s march, but she urged all leaders to be outspoken in opposing the demonstration. 

She also encouraged those looking for support to attend one of the Jewish Federation’s upcoming events, including Jewish matchmaker Aleeza Ben Shalom coming to Nashville on Feb. 27, or the JCRC Social Justice Seder event coming up on April 11. 

Article Link

[andhumanslovedstories]

I’m looking for a second career after working corporate. I’d like something away from a computer, workin with people, in demand, and more flexible. I do have some autistic traits though (one therapist floated it but never officially diagnosed). Do you think nursing would be a bad choice?

Here's a useless answer: it depends! I'll also give my usual caveat that nursing is a very broad field and a school nurse versus a dialysis nurse versus an ICU nurse versus a home health nurse vs a community health nurse are all going to have different experiences. You'll probably spend more time at a computer than you might like (documenting......), but if you get efficient at it, you can blast through it alright. Except when you can't.

And you will work with people! In any part of nursing, you'll be working with people, often in intimate and vulnerable ways. You meet a lot of cool people and get to be there for a lot of cool moments, cool and funny and profound moments. Working with people when they aren't at their best can be exhausting. Working with people when they aren't at their best and also you're understaffed and also someone is complaining of new onset chest pain at the same time someone else is calling to be cleaned up because they've been incontinent--it's really easy to exhaust yourself out of compassion. You have to care and actively engage with people's often tragic situations, but you also have to protect yourself from secondhand trauma. It's okay if this is not something you're comfortable or good with, but if so, you should probably think critically about whether nursing is for you.

And flexible--maybe??? Again, different jobs will have different perks. A lot of nurses work prn which means they have to pick up a certain number of shifts a month, but they aren't on the schedule normally. You just pick up as you want. Very flexible! But also a lot of these nurses are getting their healthcare elsewhere, usually a partner. Like any shift work, you can always swap shifts with a coworker if you can find one who'll do it. When I worked in home health, it was very hard to adjust my schedule because there wasn't necessarily another nurse that could fill in. And often units in the hospital will have various schedule stipulations--work every other weekend, work a certain amount of holidays, work night shift until you get the seniority to go to days or become a nocturnal little freak (me). I currently work in float pool, which makes it way easier to call out and adjust schedules because I'm not assigned anywhere specific until like ten minutes before the shift starts.

And with regards to the last bit, the autistic traits, I don't know exactly which ones you mean, but none of them are an inherent obstacle to being a nurse. We need neurodiversity in nursing. Some patients might find you cold or awkward or weird or whatever way you worry you might come across. Other patients will resonate with those exact same traits. No one's the perfect nurse for all people. Some people want to that extra care, some people want competent work and then to have space for themselves, some patients want to learn everything about their situation, some patients don't even want to know what pills they're taking. Think of yourself as a specialty nurse. An oncology nurse can take care of a variety of patients, but they're most well suited and situated to take care of cancer patients. There's a patient type that is a perfect fit for you. And the same way cardiac nurses deal with strokes, and orthopedic nurses deal with respiratory infections, you work competently outside your specialty because you have a good base for your practice, but you also know that you have specialties that you are uniquely equipped to handle. Specialties like cheerleading through physical therapy, calming down dementia patients, knowing the shit out of telemetry, making sure patients get a bed bath and clean sheets, using a machine to pump a patient's blood outside your body--whatever you most like, you're most good at, what gives you energy to work. I think mine are working well with "difficult" patients, managing pain, and stealing cranberry juice from the patient fridge. for me.

I'll say too if you're worried like a lack of empathy or easy understanding of other people will be an impediment to care--I'm not saying I'm autistic, but I don't think I'm particularly empathetic. I NEVER know what people are thinking or feeling. I struggle to tell when patients are like "talk to me more!" versus "I am being polite to you, but please leave." I have never once been comforting a crying person and thought, "I am NAILING this. I am making them feel better." But I don't think I'm a bad nurse. I reverse engineer empathy by finding a situation that I was in that's similar to the situation a patient is in, and I think about what I would have wanted and appreciated in that situation. I think about what evidence says is a good thing to do in this situation. I think about what experience tells me has worked in this situation in the pas. I also just ask patients what they're feeling and what they want and why they do what they do instead of assuming I know. (That last one is so choice, we should all do it more.)

The job puts you in a lot of Situations that are hard for anyone to manage. So you can study up for a lot of Situations. I read conflict resolution books and writing by sick people, I think about how adherent I am to my own treatment plan when I get judgy, I ask patients a lot of questions in part so I can understand them but also so I can understand the next patient like them, I practice difficult conversations I can predict before I go into rooms, and I make sure I have certain phrases and reactions in my back pocket in case I'm caught by surprise. I've figured out my safe topics of conversations that I can chat about with patients that are personable but not intimate (cats, how long you've been in the area, how hard it is to sleep in the hospital at night). I periodically try out new conversation styles and topics to see how those work. I find people I admire and I try consciously to emulate them.

I make a shitload of rules too that help me structure my behavior so I can act like a person I'm proud of. If I can't get something for a patient, I have to go back and tell them that instead of just never returning to the room. Whenever I leave a room, before I go, I make sure the call light is within reach and I ask if there's anything I can do before I go. If someone is sad, ask if they want hot chocolate, and if they say yes, ask if they want it with hot water or milk. If I have a patient that is very chatty and always on the call light, allot conversation time with them like I'm scheduling wound care in case they're lonely. Whenever I tell a patient that they can't do something, I explain the clinical reasoning for that. If the only reason I can think of to tell a patient why they can't do something except "it's against hospital rules", I reconsider the refusal. I've got so many rules and guidelines I've developed for myself so I can best act in a way that I think a good nurse should act.

(usual disclaimer that this does not mean I always accomplish this or that I always behave in a way I'm proud of. but I do think developing these rules and following them makes behaving like I want to more habitual.)

All this to say--I care tremendously about my patients when they're my patients, but I don't take most of them home with me. I feel often feel very distant from the emotions of the situation. I used to feel like I was watching the world through glass. Now I still feel like that, but not in a bad way. I don't get mad when patients yell at me. I can view their problems as quests to solve. I'm engaged but I'm not flustered by distress.

look alllllllllllllllllll that to say is have you considered making nursing a special interest? works for me. oh and YEAH. The job security is AMAZING. It's such a weight off my mind to know that if I don't like my current job, it's so easy to get another somewhere else.

[carlsdarling]

She-Wolf

Y/N arrives in Alexandria and falls for Carl, but he already has a girlfriend... But Y/N is not going to accept this. Novel. Everyone is 18 and over.

WARNINGS: dark content, yandere! Reader, later violence, smut, angst

Actually, when Carl Grimes saw you for the very first time, he should have paid attention to his intuition. Because when he looked down from the wall and spotted you, your rain-soaked face under the red hood of the cranky red velvet cloak you wore, your big eyes pleading with him - he shuddered. Somehow there was something wolfish about you.

But Carl paid no further notice to the feeling; if he thought about it at all, he suspected it had something to do with the fact that you had so suddenly emerged from the sodden woods and demanded entry to Alexandria in the midst of the deluge of rain. Whatever danger there might be from you, he could see at once that you were just a lonely girl, a girl about his age.

And Carl wouldn't have been Carl if he hadn't let you in right away. After all, you could hardly take care of yourself.

What Carl didn't know was that it had only been a few days since your last group had outcast you and chased you away because you had become dubious to them. After Melanie had had her accident. But you couldn't help it, you were just the way you were. Your personality was as unusual as the red cape you wore; you had looted it from the trove of a school theater group, probably from a performance of Little Red Riding Hood.

But none of that meant that anyone had the right not to accept you for who you were, and of course you couldn't walk around alone among the walkers permanently, so it was only fair that Rick take you into Alexandria. And you weren't a bad person, either. You certainly had your good qualities, even if they were perhaps well hidden.

Admittedly, you weren't one hundred percent honest in the three questions. But at least you answered the first question truthfully, and that had to be enough. You were accepted in Alexandria and assigned a house.

From your first day, Carl Grimes had fascinated you. From the moment he met you at the gate, you were drawn to him. His charisma, his slender figure, his handsome face, his hair, you even found sexy the fact that Carl was missing an eye. And his hands. God, his hands, his fingers! Wonder if Carl even knew what he could do with fingers like that?

As it soon turned out, he knew, because he was in a relationship with a girl named Martha. When you found out about it, you felt as if ice-cold water had been poured on you, because in your mind Carl was just perfect for you and you for him. It had not been at all conceivable to you that he was already taken; it was certain to you that Carl and you belonged together. This fact was written in stone, so to speak.

You had just been on your way to the house where Carl lived with his family when he unexpectedly met you - hand in hand with this Martha. Your shock was followed by fiery anger. In your opinion, this Martha was an unremarkable, clumsy creature with straggly hair and a plain face, she was nothing special, she did not deserve Carl and by her presence prevented him from being united with his one true love - you. Martha was a worthless parasite, and you just couldn't understand what Carl liked about her. But after all, then it couldn't be serious and it would be easy to steal Carl away from Martha and make him understand where he belonged.

You were even more surprised when you met Enid, Carl's ex-girlfriend, a little later. You learned from Ron that Carl had broken up with Enid because of Martha. Enid had so much more charm and she was so much prettier; the whole thing was ridiculous. Carl had to have lost his mind. He just couldn't be serious about any of this!

In the time that followed, you often attempted to date Carl, but the two of you were never alone, he was always dragging that Martha along, and usually Enid, Ron, and his little brother Sam were also there. There just weren't many young people your age in Alexandria. Carl didn't seem to understand that you didn't just want to hang out with him, you wanted a date with him. The moment you let him know you loved him and wanted to be with him, he would break up with Martha, you were completely sure of that.

But Carl seemed to be evading you more and more after a few weeks, it almost felt like he was avoiding you. "I hardly see Carl lately," you complained to Ron.

The latter chose his words carefully. "Um, Y/N, I think he and Martha had a row about you," he said carefully. Wild joy took hold of you. Carl had probably said to Martha that he wanted to break up with her because of you, that he didn't love her. But then Ron went on to say, "Martha thinks you're trying to make a pass at Carl and is jealous. That's why Carl promised her to limit contact with you to the bare minimum, to prove her wrong."

"Fuck!" you screeched intemperately, hurling the can of Coke you'd been drinking from against the nearest tree.

Ron stared at you as if you were a ghost. "What's the matter with you?" he asked, confused.

Wordlessly, you got up and just walked away. You wouldn't let Martha do that to you. She forced Carl to stay with her, she coerced him and constricted him, even though he certainly didn't want to be with her at all! But now you would roll out the heavy artillery. You knew when Martha was on guard duty and when Carl would be home alone. You would go to him, in your prettiest outfit, and make it clear how you felt about him, and then Martha would be history. You were rock solidly convinced of that. You longed for Carl so much that it physically hurt - for kissing him, hugging him, inhaling his scent, having his dick inside you, hell, you lay in bed every night with a dripping wet pussy, pleasuring yourself, moaning Carl's name like you were insane. But it didn't help, your desire for him only grew. You wanted him. You needed him. You needed Carl Grimes like the air you breathe, and he had to finally understand that.

--

Tags: @loveforcarl @knochentrocken0808

[bronx-bomber87]

Happy Wednesday fandom :) I love this episode. The aftermath of 5x01. I remember being so very excited every week cause I knew this was their season. I was so giddy for every era we were getting. This ep started the hurts so good/pining era. Nothing better than having your ship on the cusp and getting excited every ep to see what comes next. Return of Genny in this one yay missed her. Imma need more in s6. Looking at you writers.

5x02 Labor Day

We start the ep with a guilt ridden Lucy bringing Chris home to her apt. We all know at this point that’s the reason they’re still together. She nearly cheated on the man for loophole sex with her best friend. Not only that but almost partook while he was dying in the process. Still glad it didn’t go down that way but guilt is the main factor here IMO. Lucy is getting him settled in when there a knock at the door. Love how this detective comes up and doesn’t even care she’s interrupted them.

Legend already haha Says her name is Detective Misha Porter. She teaches at the UC school In Sacramento. Lucy looks star struck saying she knows who she is. Mischa said she’s been doing recruiting and her name keeps coming up. Of course it does Lucy is amazing. Saying she’s worked several impressive OPs. That makes for an ideal candidate. That she is here to recruit her.

Lucy looks guilt ridden once again as she looks at stupid Chris. Just holding her back in so many ways it’s painful. She asks when classes start? Porter tells her next Monday. Saying it’s short notice but they had someone fall out. She’s sure her sergeant would approve it. Lucy lights up for first time at the mention of Tim. Knowing he would. He would do ANYTHING for her career. Something we will see of more at the end of this ep.

Lucy continues to hesitate. Porter sees this and says her classes will open up a ton of doors for her. Lucy tells her she knows. That Detective Harper has told her all about it. She hands her the folder. Saying every unit will want to poach her from patrol after this. Lucy tells her she will think about it…Oh my girl he is not worth giving up UC for. That guilt truly dominating all her decisions.

She returns to Chris and even he tells her to go for it. We see the stress and continued weight of what happened control her. Saying no it can wait. It’s almost like she needs someone else to push her in that direction...Also that someone else is the real reason she doesn’t want to leave. *cough Tim cough*

We see Tim pull up to meet Genny. What is it about him driving that big truck that is so sexy? Mmm. Also in civies. Yum take me now sir. Haha Love that smile of his when he looks at the house. Thank you to your wife for having you do this. It sounds like Genny is having an argument on the phone. Tim asks if she’s ok? She sweeps it under the rug like a classic Bradford.

She just needed his signature on some stuff before the open house. Tim looks so excited this is done and they can finally move on. Genny looks extra sad about it. Seems like it's more than just the house. Tim picks up on this and tells her not to get sad over this house LOL She should be excited they’re gonna get half a mill each for this place. He then is sweet and tells her to call him if she needs anything. Such a good brother ❤️

We return to Lucy at home with Chris. He’s going over her packet saying she has to go. I will give him this and ONLY this. He isn’t trying to keep her from UC school. Now he is trying to do the thing only Tim can. Which is talk her down and have her see some reason. Not gonna happen with you clown. You are not the one for that job. Lucy saying this is where she wants to be. It’s not though…

Lucy is still so angry as she talks about Rosalind. As she should be that’s some serious PTSD for her. Once again not the guy to help her through this anxiety. The guilt is eating away at her and nothing Chris can say will help. Because he is part of that guilt. She almost cheated on him while Rosalind got to him. That’s what’s really eating at her.

Another reason I’m glad it didn’t happened. Would’ve tainted their time together. That would’ve been a painful hill to get over. So no thank you. I’ll be forever grateful it unfolded the way that it did. She is putting off UC for one reason she can’t tell Chris about. Would only add to never ending weight on her soul currently. I wanna hug her.

Oh how I love this scene with Angela. First off I adore him giving her half his burrito ha besties. Second she truly is a cheerleader for Chenford. Also for Tim’s happiness. She just wants to see her grump of a friend be happy. Angela knows that answer is Lucy. It’s been her forever. So she does a little poking around in this scene. Fishing to see what answers she can get. Starting off asking Tim the question that’s been on her mind since Vegas. Even more so since Chris got attacked.

‘How’s Lucy?’ We all know this question isn’t as innocent as it appears. Because well Lopez. He’s out of his damn mind if thinks she gonna let any of this go. I adore this friendship so very much. We notice how Tim likes to surround himself with strong women. His bestie is one of them. His wife another. Only ones he allows to talk to him this way. Heh. I love it. The teasing she does early on in this season is amazing. We were all rooting for her doing this.

Calling him out trying to get him to face his feelings. Do something about them. Angela is as perceptive as they come. And they are as blatantly obvious as two humans could be. Even Nolan knows LOL Tim starts off with a standard answer. She’s shaken but taking time off with Chris. Angela doesn’t care about the Chris part. Asking why he was even there in the first place to find him? Her instigation makes me laugh so hard. Trying to get a real answer out of him. Tim deflecting as he attempts to hold it together for the moment. Just saying he was dropping her off after Vegas. Lies lies and more lies.

Angela’s face is everything. Her 'Mmm-hmm' Calling Tim on his BS answer with her facial expression alone. This is so funny. Tim catching onto what she is throwing down. Asking what she’s implying? When he’s knows EXACTLY what she’s implying. Because babe you almost did what she is suggesting here. You’re just upset cause you're getting caught in that suggestion. I love her throwing back ‘What do you think?’

She is trying so hard to get him to cop to what almost happened between them. Tim goes back to his platonic answer of ‘Just dropping her off. ’ Although his voice gets a little higher in pitch when he does,. Angela’s second ‘Mmm-hmm.’ Is everything. She isn’t buying what you’re selling Timothy. Not for one second. Angela Lopez is a QUEEN. I love her sfm. Man is lying to himself and she just wants him to realize that.

Poor Lucy is desperate for another opinion. So she seeks out her UC mentor. She is so cute when she says Harper is glowing haha I love her sfm. Lucy is asking everyone except the one person she knows would have her answer. So she is hitting up a very pregnant Harper LMAO Who is in no state of mind to be helping her out.

James basically ushers her out of the house. My girl. She needs advice so much and isn’t getting what she needs from those around her. Trying to find someone to validate her skipping for Chris. Thing is she isn’t going to find that. No one is going to validate this guilt of her's like she is seeking. Once again just wanna hug her.

We see Genny waiting in the parking garage for Tim. She called him earlier in the day about offers. Saying they had a developer who wanted over asking. But also a sweet family who wanted it for asking. Tim telling her to go with developer. Cause he doesn't care bout the house. So he makes a crack when she shows up about selling it to a sweet family for 100 bucks ha Such a brother things to do to her. Genny says no.... She has another reason for meeting up other than the house. It’s here we learn about why Genny has been stressed all day. Her and her husband are getting a divorce. Tim tells her how sorry he is. He has most definitely Been there.

Tim asks about the house and who they’re gonna sell it to? Asking if they’re gonna pick the happy family? Genny says no the highest bidder. That divorce isn’t cheap. HA That’ll it’ll soften the blow for her financially being a single mom now. Tim asks if her husband is moving out? She says no she wants to move. Here actually. Asking Tim if that’s ok? He lights up. If there’s anything he needs right now it's family. Especially with all the messy stuff with Lucy atm. It’s so sweet how excited he is. Also their hug is also very adorable. I just adore them so very much.

They nailed casting for his sister. They have an excellent sibling rapport. Good chemistry in that way. Also they do look like they could be related it’s unreal. I love the smile on Tim’s face as he hugs her. My heart. Family is so important to have around. Especially when you’re close to them. This is what Lucy wanted for him out of 4x08. Them to not be torn about their dad but be there for each other like this. Getting me all emotional cause what I have with my baby sister. You know he’s excited he will get to see his nephews more and such too. I love it.

We finally reach their first scene of the ep. It’s a doozy everyone. But such a good one. This is the stage I like to call it 'Hurts so good.' I will always take good productive angst. Well written angst. It’s the BS teenager angst I cannot stand. These people are in their thirties. They don’t got time for that crap. The secret child or breaking up for no reason other than just to make the miserable. Nothing makes me angrier than useless angst just for the sake of having it.

This right here is the good stuff. They did a damn fine job with their angst. It leads us right into that good pining era as well. There is a knock at Lucy’s door. It’s Tim looking mighty fine if you ask me. Says he’s checking in. Asks Chris how he’s feeling? He replies Lucy is taking care of him. The sweet almost sad look to his smile gets me.

Knowing first hand how caring she is. She cared for him long before he was ready for it. When he didn’t appreciate like he would now. This moment is their breakup before they even got together scene. Because that’s basically what it is. We all know Tim included why she’s really holding back from UC school. Her front is Chris. When really it’s Tim and everything they haven’t untangled from Vegas. They haven’t talked about it whatsoever. Tim is there to clear the air.

Lucy is a little bristly with him at the door. He doesn’t let it deter him. Asking her if he can talk to her? She says yes and follows him out into the hallway. Ahh this hallway where so much happened last time. The context and situation so much different this time around. Tim being straight with her right off the bat. Saying he hears she’s on the fence about UC school. She has been hunting down opinions all day long. The one she needs the most comes to her. I love this sfm. Kudos to the writers for setting up this scene so well. Lucy is shocked Chris called him.

Tim says yes it was unexpected..but he wanted him to talk to her. Interesting how Chris could know Tim would be the voice of reason for her. But can’t figure she’s in love with the man and vice versa. Lucy telling him it’s not the right time. Tim won’t stand for this answer. That she owes it to herself to go. Lucy has been the voice of reason for him many times. There to absolve him of his guilt when he blamed himself about Mitch and Caleb. She couldn’t stand him bearing a burden that wasn’t his.

The beautiful part of this heartbreaking scene is he is now doing the same for her. He came not only about UC school but for her guilt. The guilt she is wearing like armor at the moment. About Chris, about what almost happened between them while he was dying. Tim telling he’s going to be fine. That what happened to him ISN'T her fault. Telling Lucy what she used to tell him. Stop weighing your soul down with guilt that isn’t yours to carry.

Lucy brings up what they were about to do. ‘We were about to..’ The way she says that line there is some longing in there. How yes, she’s still with Chris and the guilt that exists with that. But her desire for what almost happened is still there. She doesn’t want to ignore what almost happened between them.

Tim following up with ‘But we didn’t. We didn’t.’ Gah some longing in his voice too. He too is sad they didn’t. The softness in his voice as he delivers that line. Gah it’s so good. Part of him still wishing they had. They had this awakening of their feelings mixed with UC. Then Chris almost dying throwing a nasty wrench in it all.

There is so much subtext behind the lines they’re saying to each other. Lucy then notes the thing she’s been clinging onto. Being his go-fer. Asking if he’s getting rid of her as it? The hurt in her voice *heart clutch* It's written all over her face. Last thing she wants is for Tim to push her away. It’s why she was avoiding UC school in first place. She doesn’t want to lose working with him if she can’t be with him. It’s the closest thing she has to that and now he’s proposing taking that away.

This feels like a breakup because well it is. Their work dynamic/relationship is a huge part of who they are. It’s how we got to this place we’re in. It’s a sacred thing to both of them. Tim is trying to ease her hurt with his reply. Telling her 'No…he’s just trying to look out for her.' The emotions in his voice as he says this. I wanna cry. They both have pre-tears in their eyes. Tim knows this is the right thing to do. Nothing and I mean nothing is more important to that man than protecting her career. Protecting her. Look how far he has come.

Was almost rabidly against her doing UC. Now he’s encouraging it because he knows it’s what best for her. Even if that means leaving him behind. Tim refuses to jeopardize her career in anyway. It’s why he fought her being his aide at first the way he did. Didn’t want anyone to question her or why she got to where she is. Didn’t want any hand in people thinking less of her when it wasn’t true. That even if it hurts them both he is going to look out for her first and foremost.

Lucy can't believe what she's hearing. It's all over her expression in that first gif above. The hits keep coming with this scene. Tim telling her it’s time to move on. When he’s really saying is about them. They had their shot and now it’s time to move on. That they have to accept it's not going to happen for them. Gah kills me as I’m writing this. Took the man years to realizes he was in love with her. Now that he does he can’t have her. So he’s willing to do the honorable thing. Step aside and put his feelings on back burner.

Set aside what he wants for what she needs. Because he knows Lucy. How selfless she is for those she loves. He refuses to let her give up her aspirations for him. Lucy is crushed with his retort of moving on. They’re both so vulnerable in this scene. It’s what makes it hurt so damn good. Props to Eric and Melissa once again. Conveying so much with their words, eyes, and expressions. We are truly lucky to have them as our ship.

Lucy does some double talk of her own. Saying some time away would be good. Really meaning she can’t be around him especially after him breaking this off. That if she can’t be with him better to be away from him. That this far too painful for her. For them both really. Tim trying to build up her saying what a great opportunity this will be. We know how hard this conversation is for him to have. But it shows the depth of growth in him to have it.

This is so very hard on him to give up. Lucy can’t even say more. Her heart is breaking in this moment. Her person is sending her away from him. All she can muster up is ‘Mmhmm..’ because if she speaks any further she’s going to cry. Tim most definitely won’t be able to handle that. Tim with tears in his eyes telling her she should go for it. Even if it’s killing him inside to be apart from her. To walk away from their potential romantically.

Tim feels the best thing he can do for her is distance himself. He is going to fall on his sword to make sure her future is secure. Now that is love. My goodness. The way she is searching his face in the first gif. Oof. She looks so hurt and angry at him for this. She also is trying to keep her shit together. It breaks my heart. This entire scene does. Then our boy walks away and she looks devastated. He has a smile on his face till he turns away from her. Then we see the heartbreak evident on his beautiful face. Ugh.

How she can go back in Chris after that I don't know.. After this scene I knew this season was going to be a hell of a ride. This was the perfect productive angst for them. Hurt like a SOB to watch. A true gut punch to your feels. But damn so well written and acted. I loved it sfm. Oh my lord I love this season.

~~~

Side notes-non Chenford

Nyla’s entire birth SL is hilarious. It’s an insane ride that I love. ‘It’s a girl’ LMAO LEGEND

Thank you thank you to all you amazing readers. Wouldn’t have gotten this far without you all. Your likes, reblogs and comments fuel My soul to write. Shall see you all in 5x03 :)

[wheels-of-despair]

The Last First Day Pairing: Eddie Munson x You Summary: This is it. Eddie Munson's last first day at Hawkins High. His final senior year. Class of '86, baby! Contains: Eddie and Evil Woman being annoying and ridiculous and so in love they don't care about making a scene, Higgins being So Done with them, a little suggestive humor. Words: 700ish

"BABY!"

You whip around in the crowded Hawkins High hallway, packed full of students hustling toward their next class on that always-awkward first day of school, searching for Eddie's voice. Where is he? What's wrong? He's not in trouble already, is he?

When you finally spot him and make eye contact, his jaw drops.

"It IS you! I haven't seen you in FOREVER!"

He literally saw you an hour ago, when he picked you up for school. And every day of the summer. And almost every day of the previous school year. But you know what he's doing, and you can't deny him this. Not on the first day of his last senior year.

You'd bullied the guidance counselor into putting you and Eddie in most of the same classes. It had taken some work to convince her that it really was for academic reasons, but in the end, she'd given in. What's the worst that could happen? He'd already repeated his senior year twice. The only way to go is up. Or, as most of the administration hoped: out. And since the faculty didn't seem to care about helping him get there themselves, they decided to let you give it a shot. You'd show them. You and Eddie would show them all.

Right after this happy reunion with your one and only.

"MY EDDIE! YOU FOUND ME!"

His face lights up when he sees that you're going to play with him. You stretch out your arms, thankful you'd shoved everything in your backpack after your last class, and rush toward him. Eddie takes off too, and after several grunts from people who'd been rammed into, the student body begins to duck to the side and clear a path for you.

You collide with a thump and hold each other in a crushing hug when you meet in the middle of the hallway, like you hadn't seen one another in years. Eddie finally lets go and reaches for your face, and holds it in his hands like a treasure.

"Oh my god, you're so beautiful! I'd almost forgotten what you looked like!" He's loud and he's obnoxious and you'll never love anyone more.

"I missed you!" You lean in to punctuate with a kiss. "So!" Another. "Fucking!" Another. "MUCH!" A longer one, which ends in a wet smack worthy of a cartoon. "Please don't ever leave me alone for that long again. I'll die. I swear, I'll die without you." You're also being loud and obnoxious, but not entirely untruthful.

You gaze into each other's eyes, in the middle of that crowded hallway full of people scoffing at you, and you think this just might be the happiest you've ever felt. The bell rings, but you can't bring yourself to pull away from him. Not yet.

A grown-up presence announces itself with a sigh, and you and Eddie break eye contact to look at Principal Higgins.

"That was the warning bell, which signifies that it's time for The Munsons to proceed to their next class," he says tiredly.

Eddie gives him a mock salute and hooks an arm around your neck, pulling you away from Higgins and toward your next class. Which you have together. You smile and lean into him, basking in the fact that you were just referred to as The Munsons.

"Pretty sure we just got married," Eddie observes.

"Oh yeah?" you grin. "Is Higgins an ordained principal?"

"Yup," Eddie says, eyes forward. "I've been studying in this place for a looong time. I know how things work. We're married now."

"Are you gonna carry me across the threshold into English class?" you tease, giving him a playful poke in the ribs.

"Don't tempt me, Mrs. Munson," he smirks. "I'm gonna wait 'til science. There's a human anatomy unit during senior year." He waggles his eyebrows at you. He should know; he's failed it twice.

"Is the unit… hard?" you ask seductively.

He stops just outside the classroom door and leans down to whisper in your ear, so only you can hear. His hair tickles the side of your face. "Not as hard as the unit that'll help you earn extra credit after school."

[transmascutena]

I think it's interesting how one of the healthiest relationships in the show is Wakaba and Utena's friendship. Obviously, it has its flaws and tensions. But those tensions arise directly from the concept of being "special," from Wakaba dealing with their sense of inferiority towards Utena, who actively puts their sense of self-worth in winning these duels to keep Anthy at their side (a noble Prince...) People talk about Tatsuya being rejected as a Black Rose duelist a lot, but it's so notable that he's rejected because he's just...a more emotionally mature, less toxic person. Yeah, his heart is broken, but there is something decidedly human and mundane about how he approaches the conflict by asking, "What's wrong with me?" He sees him and Wakaba as two equals, he doesn't put their love conflicts on a pedestal, and he wants genuine solutions and hopes to confront his own flaws to understand why Wakaba rejected him.

Literally no one else is doing it like him.

A key theme in this show is critique of the nuclear family, but an extension of that theme is how said family unit breeds deep dysfunction into the characters' lives. The lack of communal infrastructure means characters are constantly putting their eggs in one basket. Everyone wants to return to their past because Ohtori and the patriarchal system doesn't offer chances to form new connections outside of the ones born of your trauma/childhood. Their lives are defined by their suffering. I view Wakaba and Utena's relationship as so important BECAUSE of how mundane it is, these 2 people met and they became friends and they eat bentos together and Wakaba views herself as non-special, but she doesn't realize how severely fucked up and lonely all the special people are.

I could go on. I want to write essays about this anime, for real. But it's something that struck me as I watch the show for the first time.

one of the reasons i find utena and wakaba's friendship so interesting and appealing is the fact that it and its issues are so mundane in the middle of all melodrama of the duels and the student council relationships and all of those things. their flaws feel very real for a teenage friendship, and they're all things i can personally relate to on some level. they obviously genuinely care about each other, but their friendships suffers from them not truly understanding each other, mostly because of their own lacking communication (utena doesn't tell wakaba any of the weird things going on in her life, probably out of some desire to protect her from it, and wakaba doesn't tell utena how upset that makes her, and ends up resenting her.) and it's completely accurate what you said about the tragedy of wakaba wanting to be special like utena is, but not realizing that said "specialness" comes at the cost of abuse and trauma. ohtori (akio) purposefully obfuscates that abuse to make it seem like something you should want. trying to disguise grooming as romance, etc. etc. the beauty of the rose hides its thorns and all that.

i'm not sure i'd call it the healthiest relationship in the show (although the bar is so low that it probably is by default) but it's important that the ways in which it is harmful are so normal. who hasn't ever been bad at communicating their feelings to people they care about? who hasn't kept secrets that they probably shouldn't? who hasn't grown apart from a middle school friend once new things started happening in their life? i'd argue that the flaws in the show's other relationships are also pretty normal when you strip away the layers of metaphor and symbolism from them (in the sense that abuse is exceedingly common.) but utena and wakaba's friendship exists almost entirely outside of that, which makes it stand out.

[mulderscully]

i feel like oversharing today.

it's an odd feeling to be moving out at 30. i'm doing what i "should" have done over ten years ago and i keep going over and over how i ended up here.

there is the basic element of the pandemic & the housing crisis but for me, i cannot help but feel like my family failed me and i don't feel like me saying that is pity seeking or asking for sympathy. it's just true and i deserve to say that.

when i was 16 my mom died, she had been terminally ill for THREE years. my aunt and uncle knew she was going to die, they knew they would take me in. they promised her to take care of me.

the summer after my mom's death was one of the worst years of my life, but the summer after my senior year was even worse because that is when the situation genuinely became abusive and i just couldn't see what it was.

until i graduated high school at 19 (yes, i was always a little old in school for some reason) i was allowed to keep my mom's social security benefits, so i would recieve about $200 a month for my needs. at the time $90 of that would go to a storage unit that held all of me and mom's stuff from our old apartment. it got to the point that i couldn't keep paying it so me and my family decided to empty it out.

it gets messy here because my aunt is a hoarder, and i did not understand the gravity of that til that day. she didnt want to donate anything. at all, we physically had no space for the stuff so we went against her, this ended up in her throwing herself at me in the car and kicking me onto the street, grabbing me so hard she ripped my bra and i had to wait for my uncle to come and get me.

i did not understand this was abuse.

that night she jumped at me and choked me until my uncle pulled her off me.

i did not understand this was abuse.

because we threw "her" stuff away that entire summer she was a constant ball of fury that i have never seen. i would sleep and wake up her banging on my door, screaming to let her in.

i would feel dread when i was walking home cause i knew she would be yelling and throwing things because i "betrayed" her.

i did not understand that this was abuse. i JUST let myself start calling it that.

somehow as time went on this stopped happening as often. a lot of other things happened, my aunt also assaulted my uncle and my cousin and was arrested multiple times. but i just... got used to it? because i did, and DO love my aunt and felt like... i owed her bc she took me in.

so when this calmed down, and would only happen every few months, i stayed because i was so depressed. i would sleep until 3 pm every day. i worked nights around that habit. my bedtime was 4 am. i didn't ever wanna be awake when everyone else was. i did not understand how fucked up i was. no one asked me if i needed help,

it wasn't until right before the pandemic when i was 25 that i was like... finally waking up. the pandemic was hard because i had to be in the house all the time and the hoarding got worse bc all of us are too defeated to help now. the house is swallowing me. i come home and feel like i want to go anywhere else. i have a constant stomach ache that i fear is cancer but logically is probably just stress.

i cannot live like this anymore and i will not anymore. i never thought i would actually say i'm moving out and mean it but it's happening. i had to crawl my way out of the grief of my mother's death for thirteen years because my aunt considered her own more important, because she abused me.

i don't know how to even explain my life to people without them looking horrified, but i'm excited for that to change.