#also thanks again to josh because i owe him my life

[tomboyneedshercoffee]

Lovedust Pt.8 || Peter Parker x Stark Reader

Summary: Y/N and Josh talk things over about where they stand as Y/N tries to build the courage to confess to Peter. One night on top of the roof, Y/N and Peter reveal any secrets they’ve been keeping from each other. 

Word Count: 5k

Author’s Note: This is technically the last part of Lovedust but there will be an epilogue. I was going to go a whole different direction and make it too angsty because sometimes, life works out that way but you guys deserve a happy ending ;) This series was only meant to be about three parts long but because of ow supportive and kind you all have been, I just have no words except thank you all so much. I will give a better thank you for the epilogue  but until then, enjoy the chapter. 

Warning: adult language

part one || part two || part three || part four || part five || part six || part seven || part eight || epilogue 

You stared up at your bedroom ceiling quietly, picking at the stitching of your blanket to the point where you had about four inches of loose thread massaged between your thumb and middle finger.

Three minutes. 

Peter was presumed dead for three minutes as you were giving him CPR that was literally a race against the clock. One hundred eighty seconds was the span between life or death and you couldn’t help but think of what if you had stopped after a minute? What about one hundred and seventy-nine seconds?

Three minutes. Your mind was so fucked that the only thing you could compare the time to was that Peter was dead longer than the time it took to pop a bag of popcorn in the microwave.

You thought back to the time where you had gone to California with Tony where you were alone in the hotel room while he had a conference. You remembered how scared you felt when the ground started to shake underneath you as the earth rolled underneath.

That earthquake must’ve only lasted fifteen seconds tops and yet, you felt like it was an eternity of shielding yourself underneath one of the desks that would’ve surely broken if the roof caved in overhead.

It’s odd how times works, whenever you’re in a dangerous situation, your body literally slows downtime so you can have the best chance at survival. So while those three minutes didn’t seem like a long time, the lingering fear of losing Peter after everything sent your body through emotional distress like no other.

It felt like a cruel joke; you had only come to realize you were in love with him when he was dying in front of you. What was even crueler was that even though everything seemed less complicated now that you really understood how you felt about him, it was only the tip of the iceberg.

It had been a few days since you had seen Peter since the night of the party and you felt like you were slowly losing your sanity. Your dad tried convincing you that Peter needed to be monitored for a while but maybe he just wanted you two to stay away from each other since you practically almost killed him by kissing Josh.

You loved Peter and he “loved” you yet once he was cured, he wouldn’t share the same feelings for you. What would happen once he was cured? How different would things be between you, especially since you would be having feelings for someone who doesn’t love you back? 

Loving someone who surely wasn’t in love with you felt like a whole new level of self-destruction.

Your phone rang from underneath your pillow and temporarily interrupted your thoughts. You reached under the pillow to pull out your phone to find that Josh was calling you. 

You inhaled sharply as you practically leaped out from under your covers, unsure of what to do. 

The last you heard from Josh was the night of the party but just like Peter, you hadn’t seen or spoke to him since. That wasn’t the full truth, Josh had been texting you to make sure you were okay but you didn’t have the strength to even reply to his worried texts. 

Poor Josh. He felt like an innocent bystander who got hit in the crossfire of what was going on between you and Peter.

In past relationships, you were like Josh. Your past boyfriends seem to always treat you as a rebound, a backup in case things went south and as gross as it made you feel, it was like you could sort of understand why your exes felt that way.

You didn’t want to lead Josh on, he was too nice of a guy to deserve that type of treatment. Your thumb hovered over the screen and you answered his call at the last second. He deserved that at the least.

“ Hey sorry, I was um, preoccupied. Is everything okay?” You asked as you started to pace your room.

“ I was going to ask the same for you. You haven’t been answering my texts and I was getting worried.”

You bit the inside of your cheek as a wave of guilt washed over you,” Y-Yeah I’m sorry. I’ve just been going through some stuff. I didn’t mean to worry you.”

“ You don’t have to apologize, I get it. I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something in person, are you doing anything at the moment? 

You rolled your shoulders back as you let out a deep sigh. In all honesty, you didn’t feel like leaving your room but if you were going to pick Peter over Josh, you also would have to owe him an explanation.

“ Okay, where do you want to meet?”

“ We can meet outside your complex, I don’t want to inconvenience you.”

“ Oh that’s probably easier anyway, when are you gonna come over?” You asked as you fell backwards onto your bed.

“ Um...I’m already outside.”

Your eyes widened as you scrambled over to your window to squint out towards the entrance. Sure enough, if you squinted really hard, you could make out Josh’s car outside the front gate.

“ Oh fuck! Sorry um, I’m coming out now!” You didn’t bother to let Josh respond as you hung up the phone and practically rushed out of your bedroom.

You practically sprinted across the front lawn all the way to the entrance and once you opened the gate, you leaned your body against the side of Josh’s car to help catch your breath.  

“ You didn’t have to run all the way here, I could’ve waited,” Josh said with a smile as he watched you struggling.

“ I know,” You huffed as you felt yourself calm down,” but it would have been awkward if you just stood there for five minutes and watched me walk the whole way.”

“ Okay, that’s fair,” Josh chuckled as he leaned against the side of his car beside you,” I wanted to talk to you about the night of the party. I just want to make sure you’re okay and I’m sorry if I overstepped by kissing you. I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable.”

You felt your heartstrings tug at his words as you looked down at your flip flops. You didn’t know how to explain to him that he wasn’t the one who overstepped but that the kiss was never supposed to happen. 

“ You don’t have to apologize Josh and you didn’t make me uncomfortable at all. It’s just...I know how you feel about me and don’t get me wrong, I’m so flattered that you actually like me because to be honest, you’re way out of my league but um,” You awkwardly rubbed your sweaty hands against your pajama bottoms and let out a shaky breath,” I thought things were fine and that they would go back to normal but um, things kinda just happened and you were there and I thought hey he’s cute, like super cute, and Kim was being so pushy-”

“ I know you have feelings for Peter, it’s okay Y/N,” Josh interrupted as he took a moment before wincing,” I didn’t mean to interrupt you but I had a feeling that’s where you were heading with it. Plus you ramble when you’re nervous and I don’t want you to say something embarrassing. ”

Bless his soul, Josh really would be the death of you.

“ Is it that obvious I like him?” 

“ Painfully obvious yeah. I kinda figured you two had something going on but after you gave him CPR and you two gave each other that look, that’s when it all clicked for me,” Josh said as you felt the tips of your ears get hot.

“ Josh, I am so sorry. I really mean it when I say that you’re the sweetest guy I have ever met and I really do wish you the best,” You answered honestly and you felt even guiltier when Josh only shrugged, a small smile tugging at his lips.

You couldn’t believe that even now as you were telling Josh you didn’t share feelings for him that he was still being incredibly sweet towards you. 

“ Same goes for you, I hope he treats you the way you deserve to be treated. I have to be honest and say that I can’t get rid of my feelings for you overnight but hopefully we can be friends somewhere along the line,” Josh offered as you felt your heart snap in two.

As you looked back at Josh, that’s when you could really make out the distinct difference between the two boys. You weren’t sure if what Josh was saying was truthful, he was harder to read than Peter and even though his mouth was saying one thing, you could see that there was some pain behind his brown eyes that told a different story. 

Yet nonetheless, you admired that Josh, despite having the full right to completely guilt you and make you feel like shit because of what happened, still chose to put any malicious intent aside for your own good.  

“ Is it okay if I hug you?” You asked as Josh returned a sweet smile, embracing you in his strong arms. 

Despite the heaviness in Josh’s chest, he felt his heart flutter at the feeling of your body pressed against his. The hug was short but even in those few seconds, Josh felt himself trying to take a mental picture of this moment, something he would replay over and over as he did his best to get over you. 

After Josh had left, you made your way back into your cave and hid out in your room for the rest of the night. You had school first thing in the morning and yet, you found yourself tossing and turning yet again. 

To cure your restless mind, you left your room and headed into the kitchen to make tea. You were never the type to drink tea but you didn’t have the patience to just lay in bed, at least this way you were occupying your mind with something else.

As the water boiled, you kept your eyes on Peter’s bedroom door, your knee bouncing up and down as if you were anticipating him opening it. You wondered how he was feeling, considering he almost died and all.

You just wished you could have the confidence to just go up and talk to him, to admit that it was him all along and that you chose him. 

You poured the tea into a mug and cradled it in your hands carefully as a pair of feet made their way into the kitchen. You turned around, anticipating Peter’s face but instead, you looked up to see your dad.

“ You didn’t hear it from me but Peter is up on the roof waiting for you. Just in case if you were wondering,” Tony said as he nonchalantly dragged his finger across the countertop and peeked his head towards your tea,” aren’t you glad I made you learn CPR? I know it was part of your lifeguard course but I’m glad it came in handy.”

“  Too soon,” You sighed as you watched your dad haphazardly look through the cupboards,” and I wasn’t wondering about Peter. I’m just minding my own business and then I’m heading to bed.”

“ Minding your own business? That’s not the Y/N I know.”

“ Well, what would the Y/N you know do?” You asked as you looked down at the inside of your mug,” am I supposed to just run over to the roof and profess my love for him?” 

Tony furrowed his eyebrows and shook his head,” I never said anything about love kiddo but the Y/N I know loves to talk so yeah, I expect some emotional reunion of the sort. You’ve always been known to be a bit theatrical.”

“ And who do you think I get that from?”

“ The one and only Potts,” Tony chuckled as a small smile crept onto your lips,” I don’t know what to say because I don’t think I can bring myself to give my daughter relationship advice about a guy who lives only a few doors down. If anything, it’s against my best interest but I will make this the one exception where I will intervene simply because if I don’t, no one else will. I think you should talk to Peter. He’s been through a lot and he has some things he needs to talk to you about.”

” Well he’s the one avoiding me so maybe he should come over and say it to my face,” You didn’t know why you turned so aggressive but you took a small sip of your tea to try and ease your nerves,” I know he’s been through a lot but we both have. That night of the party was just...too much for me. ”

“ You really are my daughter, always making it about you. You gotta give the kid a break.”

“ I- Dad it is all about me. That night fucking-not sorry- sucked and I don’t know what else to say. I jumped into a pool with my clothes on and I thought Peter was dead-”

“ But he’s not dead. He’s alive and breathing and waiting for you on the roof like I told you,” Tony interrupted as you exhaled slowly,” you love him, it’s a fathers worst nightmare but even I can see clear as day that you have feelings for him, are you going to tell me I’m wrong?”

You liked to think you knew yourself better than anyone else and for the most part, it was true. Tony was probably the closest to knowing who you really were as a person and yet, everything he was saying still wasn’t enough to make you less paranoid.

“ I wouldn’t say you’re wrong but I’m too scared to say out loud that you’re right,” You said as Tony rolled his eyes,” what? What did I say?”

“ You love to talk and yet, you never say enough. I don’t have the patience to stand here and listen to you beat around the bush,” Tony kneeled down towards one of the cupboards and grabbed a bottle of whiskey from the shelf,” you have a problem. Let me know how things go with Peter. Or don’t. I’ll find out anyway.”

You stood there, mouth wide open as you watched Tony playfully bump into your shoulder, what a bastard,” Yeah sure! You’re the one drinking at three am but I’m the problem?”

Tony only gave you a hasty wave before turning the corner to where the elevators were, leaving you alone in the kitchen. He was right, everything he was saying made perfect sense and yet, it annoyed you on how right he was.

You had absolutely no idea how to start a conversation with Peter now that you were sure of your feelings and yet, all you wanted to do was find him and reveal everything to him. You looked between your bedroom door and the elevators. You could either go back to bed or you could talk to Peter and nervously choke on your words like a schoolgirl.

Fuck no.

You walked over to your room with your mug in one hand but before you could open the door, your legs started to move in the direction of the elevators, seemingly with a mind of their own.

Fuck it.

You stepped into the elevator and made your way up the floors until you hit the roof access. You hardly spent any of your time on the roof since you had no reason to ever be up there in the first place but once you opened the door,  you were immediately taken aback.

The greenroof took up almost half of the roof itself, the addition being nothing more than a general garden area to look aesthetically pleasing from the sky. Since most of the energy needed to run the facility was either solar or space related, the greenroof was more of a private garden that didn’t account for energy efficiency.

A mixture of moss and summer grass covered the roof in a thick blanket that never grew beyond the border of the garden and at first glance, the brightly freckled flowers planted along the pathway seemed random but as you walked down the graveled path, you could tell that there was some element of planning that went along with it.

Along the pathway stood different hues of green bonsai trees that stood tall and proud in their wooden boxes. You were so focused on the bonsais that you didn’t notice Peter sitting on one of the benches about a couple of yards away.

Your breath hitched in your throat but your feet continued to crunch along the graveled pathway as you made your way over to him. From Peter’s spot underneath the patio, he could hear you walking towards him but kept his eyes looking straight forward, unable to tear them away from the cityscape in the far distance.

You hesitantly took a seat beside Peter on the wooden bench and tucked your legs back so you could rest the mug on your thigh. The lights that Peter had strung up a few weeks back had lost it’s brightness, leaving behind a faded orange glow in its place but it was just the right amount of light needed to where you could read his expression carefully.

“ How are you feeling?” You asked quietly as you attempted to get a feel for what mindset Peter was in.

“ Good, I feel good,” Peter said back, almost quieter than the volume you started out with,” how are you feeling?”

While both of your minds were racing at the thought of the other person, the thoughts suddenly felt almost too personal, the atmosphere being instantly filled with the conversations you two weren’t having.

Out of the two of you, Peter felt like he had more to share and yet, more to hide. You were still completely clueless on the following; A) Peter was cured B) You cured him because of the kiss and C) He loved you back

It seemed like a dream come true, Peter was still in love with you without the lovedust and you felt the same way towards him and yet, he was still terrified. As everything began to feel more and more real, suddenly the idea of being with you made his chest tighten up.

He never knew if he could ever admit it outloud but he was scared that you liked him back because what if after all this time, after all the trials and tribulation the two of you had gone through, what if you two still didn’t work out?

There was so much history between the two of you and he was worried that all of the heartbreak and pining wouldn’t be worth it in the end. He loved you so much to where he knew that he needed you no matter what. It only hurt him more to think that from your last argument, you couldn’t even bring yourself to admit to him that you loved him. 

Now that you were here in front of him, Peter would make sure you wouldn’t leave without hearing you say it back. 

As Peter tried to carefully put his thoughts in order like he had practiced, you thought back to what your dad had told you and decided that you needed to start somewhere and you had to do that by being honest.

“ I’ve been struggling these last couple of days with what happened at the party. I can’t tell how you guilty I feel for putting you through so much pain and I wish I could take it all back. I feel so guilty because it was my fault you died- did you know that? I know the paramedics talked to you but you were dead for three minutes Peter and honestly, that was one of the worst moments of my life. I mean it’s up there with what happened to my parents,” You paused as you remembered to take a breath,” I don’t know what I would’ve done if something had happened to you.”

Peter felt his mouth dry up and for a moment, it was hard to swallow,” You didn’t kill me, you saved me. I still feel like I might be in shock from it all but I don’t blame you for anything that happened. I’m sorry I even put you through that cause I’m sure it was...a lot. But don’t ever say that you killed me, none of it was your fault.”

“ It was my fault. If it wasn’t for me and Josh-,” You stopped yourself before saying more. You didn’t want to talk about Josh, all you cared about was Peter but now, the thought was evident in Peter’s mind and he couldn’t seem to shake it out of him.

The image of you kissing Josh replayed in Peter’s head over and over again as his heart ached. Josh made things more complicated than they already were.

Peter’s biggest fear was losing you but to lose you to another guy? And yet, it still made Peter feel like he was between a rock and a hard place because Peter had only meant Josh on one occasion and it was enough to give Peter an idea that Josh didn’t have cruel intentions towards you.

Just because you loved Peter didn’t mean that you didn’t have feelings for Josh and that’s what made Peter crazy. You must’ve liked Josh enough to return the kiss right?

“ He’s a good guy, I see why you like him,” Peter finally said as he shifted awkwardly in his seat, not knowing what else to say,” he would make you happy.”

The comment shakes you in an uncomfortable way, was that supposed to make you feel better? Your annoyance was jealousy in disguise, you didn’t want to talk about Josh, you were here to tell Peter how you actually felt about him but because of how Peter was delivering it, it seemed like he was giving you an out.

“ It’s not- I don’t like Josh like that.”

“ You kissed him, I saw the whole thing. Do you just go around kissing people you supposedly don’t like?” Peter couldn’t help himself and let the words slip out so easily.

It was a low blow and the two of you both knew it. 

It took every fiber of your being not to lash out at the accusation because you knew Peter had a right to be upset but you didn’t like what he was insinuating and you didn’t want the conversation to take a bad turn,” You don’t have to worry about Josh anymore. If you want me to be honest, yes, I thought there was something there but things changed. I came to talk to you because my dad said you needed to tell me something important but if you’re going to just sit here and belittle me, I’m not gonna take it. I get it, the lovedust is messing with your emotions but I’m extremely sensitive tonight, more than usual so just come back to me when you’re calm.”

You got up from your seat with a quickness but before you could step off the patio, Peter grabbed your wrist and pulled you back towards the corner of the bench.

Peter felt like such an idiot, whenever he got anxious on the fine details, he had a tendency to let the big picture escape him but it was something he knew he needed to work on while he was around you. He wasn’t going to let the conversation die just before it had started, he knew his big mouth tended to escalate conversations with you but he couldn’t let you go, not this time.

“ I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that. I’m just frustrated because this feels so one-sided. I never know what you’re thinking because you never tell me anything. You always avoid answering the question but I need more,” Peter practically begged as you felt yourself get a bit aggravated,” I am being calm but I’m desperate at this point. I need to know how you feel about me, don’t try to change the subject, I need to know. Tell me how I make you feel.”

Your tongue felt heavy in your mouth as you pulled your hand away from Peter so you could regain your thoughts without him distracting you. You were suddenly chickening out, you had never felt so nervous in your entire life and you wanted to tell him how much you loved him. You wanted to tell him what he wanted to hear but it wasn’t easy taking a step forward when you don't know where your foot will fall.

“ This is hard for me Peter, I’m trying my best and I’m sorry if it isn’t good enough but ever since the lovedust, the dynamic is different and you’ve changed. It’s so much to get used to because of...how I feel towards you,” You said as Peter let out a frustrated breath.

He hated this feeling of going back and forth, he didn’t want to hear any of it. All he wanted was to just shake your shoulders because in his mind, you had no reason to be hesitant on opening up to him,” The lovedust didn’t change just me, it changed you too! I was vulnerable and I opened up to you, I showed you how I felt about you every second of the day but you have given me nothing!”

Nothing.

That word made your blood boil because nothing? Just because it was hard for you to let your emotions out didn’t mean Peter was getting nothing back in return. Since he was infected with the lovedust, you had been doing your best to open yourself more to him and you thought you had been doing a good job.

After all those years of Peter belittling you and tearing you down, of course, you would be a bit hesitant to let down your guard and yet, you did it anyway. It took so much to get to where you were comfortable with Peter to be vulnerable, especially when you broke down from your nightmare of your parents.

To break down and crumble in front of Peter wasn’t an accident, you could only be that vulnerable if you knew that he could help piece you back together.

“ Nothing? I gave you nothing?” You spat as you felt your eyes tear up,” I saved your life! I gave you the breath in my lungs to stop you from dying! I don’t owe you anything, I don’t need to prove shit to you!”

Peter stood up from the bench and while his heart ached from seeing you so upset, he knew that he couldn’t hold back,” Don’t pull that with me Y/N, you know you haven’t been honest with me. We both know that we can’t live without the other so don’t act like you did me a favor by saving me. Why won’t you admit it, even after everything we’ve been through, you’re still scared to just admit that you might love me!”

And just like that, you felt yourself let go.

“Of course I’m scared! I’m fucking terrified Peter! Is that what you want me to say? Do you want me to admit that me almost losing you would’ve broken me? Because you’re right! Yes, I love you!” You cried out as you took in a shaky breath,” I love you so much it hurts me and I didn’t understand how badly I loved you until I almost lost you! All I could think about when I was trying to save you was never hearing your laugh and never feeling your touch and I swear Peter, if you died, I would’ve never forgiven myself. I’m sorry it took me so long to say it but I love you.  But none of it matters, you know why? Because you’re sick in the head, the lovedust is fucking with you and now it’s fucking with me!”

There it was, finally. After all of that time denying it and trying to hide your feelings to save your own sanity, you finally confessed. You had so many chances to confess that yes, it really was him all along. 

When he came into your room and comforted you through your nightmare to the two of you shouting at each other in the rain, you had always loved him. 

Even though Peter knew how you felt about him, this was the first time he heard it with his own ears and it was like hearing the symphony for the first time. Like your own soundtrack that swelled during the climax of the movie that was you and Peter, Peter could listen to you say it over and over again.

He didn’t care that most of your confession involved a string of swear words because, without them, it wouldn’t have been your true self. He knew once he admitted to you that he was cured, there would be no going back.

“ The lovedust is gone Y/N. When you kissed me- or saved me by giving mouth to mouth- the lovedust flushed out of my system completely. Banner did extra tests and he confirmed that I’m okay and back to normal all because of you.”

Your heart dropped to the floor as your eyes raked up Peter, testing to see if he was lying but he didn’t falter. This is what you were afraid of, confessing everything to him only to find out that he didn’t love you anymore but who would’ve thought it would be you to make him go back to normal.

And yet, a huge part of you was relieved because finally, the lovedust was gone. You didn’t need to worry about it ever screwing with you and Peter again but as you studied his expression, your chest felt heavy.  

You had seemingly set up your own demise,” Oh, that’s good...I’m happy for you.”

You felt yourself take a step back but Peter reached his hand out to softly hold yours. You pulled your hand away but Peter swatted your stubbornness away and held your hand tighter. He rubbed his thumb over your knuckles and when he looked back up at you, he felt his heart swell.

“ And yet, even though the pain is gone, I feel more love for you now than I have ever felt in my entire life. I understand what they mean when they say love hurts but if anything, it heals even more because you made me feel whole again. When you saved me and the first thing I saw was you looking back at me, it was like I was given a second chance to love you the right way, the way you were meant to be loved.”

“You were right, the lovedust made me fall in love with you but ever since you cured me, it was only a matter of admitting to myself that deep down, I’ve always cared about you. It opened my eyes and showed me that I will never have to look further in finding the one for me because you are everything and more,” Peter said as you moved your eyes from the floor to his figure,” I love you. I mean it. No exceptions, no strings attached, no lovedust required.”

Right then and there, you were at a loss for everything you could possibly hold; no words, no breath, no thoughts. Any resentment you held had shattered into microscopic pieces that would dissolve once crushed between something as delicate as your fingertips because he said everything you wanted to hear.

“ You love me?” You said quietly to where Peter made you repeat yourself,” Are you serious? Do you really mean it?”

Peter nodded and softly let out an ‘ of course I do’ as he brushed his fingers lightly over your cheek. He cupped your face gently with one hand as his thumb wiped away a stray tear,” Can I finally kiss you?”  

Peter’s cheeks grew red as you nodded and leaned into his touch, innocently brushing your lips against his. Peter dipped his head down to close the space between the two of you and kissed you so softly, you had to pull him closer to you to actually kiss him back.

Even though Peter was the one who asked, he felt completely unprepared kissing you back. He had imagined over and over how warm your lips would be against his but now that he was actually kissing you, he didn’t think he had enough self-control to ever stop kissing you.

You never knew a kiss could be innocent and yet so intimate but as his lips moved in perfect sync, any other logistics of the feeling went away because all you could think about was Peter. You practically melted into his touch but before you could savor the kiss, Peter pulled away breathless.

“ S-Sorry, I forgot to breathe,” Peter gushed as you smiled back up at him,” what does this mean for us now?”

You traced your finger along Peter’s wrist as you thought quietly,” I don’t know but we can figure it out together.”

Peter hummed happily before dipping his head down to kiss you and when he pulled away, he fell himself falling in love with you all over again.

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[athenasbloodyspear]

Don’t Make Me Beg Now Baby

CHAPTER ONE: EDGE OF DARKNESS

Hello fellow Greta Van Freaks. This is my very first Greta fic! I hope you enjoy.

MASTERLIST

Note: This fic contains mature themes, discussions of past non-con (no members of GVF involved) and drug use. Minors DNI. 18+ only and please take care of yourselves. (See Ao3 for full tag list)

You can also read this fic on Ao3 if you prefer!

Jake Kiszka x Original Female Character

Picture this: The boys are in Northern Michigan to write the new album and they meet a wild young woman who works at a local record store who has a rough history with rock bands.

She doesn’t want to fall into the same traps she fell into before. He doesn’t want to hurt her.

The rest of them just want them to figure their shit out.

Note: While this fic is based on the members of Greta Van Fleet, I obviously do not know them personally (lol) and nearly 99% of this is a fever dream I decided to write down. Some tid bits are based on things said in interviews/photos/songs but please do not come for my neck if you dislike my portrayals as this is a STORY that I have entirely made up.

This will be a slow burn, overly dramatic, cliché fest of me missing my Mitten State and wishing more than anything I could move back home. Their music makes me homesick and for that I’ll never forgive them. ;)

Chapter Under the Cut

CHAPTER ONE: EDGE OF DARKNESS

The tiny bell on the door to “The Edge” clanked as Jake pushed his way in, followed by Josh, Sam and Danny. The afternoon sun streamed through the slats in the windows at a harsh angle, illuminating the swirling dust. The boys all immediately took a deep breath. They all loved the smell of this place. A mix of dusty old vinyl's, incense and weed. 

The Edge was the shop owned by an old friend, Levi, who had been a longtime family friend of the Kiszka’s. The boys had made the near three hour drive to the shop whenever they had a spare weekend in their younger years. They bought Levi out of his guitar strings and drumsticks and always looked through the boxes of vinyl's hoping to find treasures. Levi sold an eclectic mix of music equipment, records, books, home goods and comically horrific coffee. 

The Edge is where they had each bought their very first instruments, had their first beers and even smoked their first joint. It was a special place for them. 

The old wood floors creaked with every step, the wood walls were covered with old articles from Rolling Stone, photos Levi had taken and autographs from the artists who had cycled through the place over the years. There were stacks upon stacks of vinyl's. Shelves of old autobiographies and music theory books. There were speakers stacked from floor to ceiling, and the whole right side of the store was jam packed with basses and guitars. The back corner had a few keyboards and a drum set, but plenty of catalogues to pick even more instruments from. There were cases of drumsticks and guitar picks and strings. The middle of the store had tables full of incense, candles and interesting home goods. There were tables where local artists sold jewelry, art pieces and furniture. It was full to the brim, most shelves rising way up to the ceiling. Most needed a ladder to reach the top. The basement had a sound studio with even more equipment set up to be used to record, or to test out. 

Levi had inherited the place from his father, who had built up quite a legendary roster of friends over his years. The shop was just off Front Street on the main drag of Traverse City. Levi’s father had made a name for himself as a great host to bands looking to escape to northern Michigan to hole up in cabins and write albums. Levi continued the tradition and took it a step further by buying the space next door and turning it into a club with live music on the weekends. 

If you were lucky, you could catch some super huge bands playing for only about 100 people in the dark side room of The Edge. 

“You bastards finally made it!” Levi called out as he came sauntering out of the back room. Levi looked the exact same as the last time the boys had seen him. Tanned skin from his days paddle boarding and hiking along the Lake Michigan shore, sandy blonde hair that was brighter in the summer, perpetual 5-o-clock shadow because he just couldn’t be bothered to shave, shell necklace around his neck, light wash jeans low on his hips with the same old cowboy boots he’d been wearing since the boys were 12. 

“Is that grey hair I see Levi?” Josh leaned forward with an exaggerated squint. Levi laughed, snagging Josh’s head to give him a noogie. 

“I may be older than you punks by a few years, but I’m not greying yet.” Levi released Josh from his headlock and gave him a shove. 

“I’d say 37 is more than a few years older than us, grandpa.” Sam snarked. 

“You’re makin me regret extending my hospitality, kid.” 

Jake felt himself relax fully for the first time in a really long time. It was just like old times. Exactly what the boys needed. 

“Welcome back dudes. I’m surprised I’m still cool enough for you Rockstar types.” Levi crossed his legs and leaned back against the front counter. 

“We’ll never be too cool for The Edge. This place will always be way cooler than we could ever be.” Danny piped up, walking forward to wrap Levi in a hug. 

“It’s been too long man.” Levi commented as he smacked Danny on the back. 

“We know.” Sam said “Way too fuckin long.” He hugged Levi next. Josh and Jake followed up with hugs next. The room was heavy with a tinge of melancholy. Old friends who had missed each other finally reunited. 

“Well, have you guys been to the house yet?” Levi stepped around the counter and started pouring four cups of the famous nasty coffee. 

“Yeah we dropped our bags off before we headed into town.” Danny spoke up. 

“Isn’t it sweet?” Levi asked enthusiastically. 

“It’s wicked man. Thanks so much for getting that set up for us.” Josh grinned as he snagged a cup off the counter. 

The house was a mid century modern cabin right on the east bay shore. It came equipped with a huge garage studio, front deck and a dock out into the bay. Levi had bought the house in foreclosure and along with help from a bunch of locals (in exchange for beer of course) they turned the house into a perfect getaway for any artists looking to come take a break up north. The place had five bedrooms and three bathrooms with a giant living room with overstuffed couches and velvet chairs. The walls were covered in art and the shelves were full to bursting with plants. It was a kaleidoscope of colors and textures,  with mix matched rugs and lamps. It was Levi’s pride and joy. 

“I’m so glad you guys like it.” Levi smiled even bigger as he passed coffees to the rest of the boys. “Once you’re a little more settled, feel free to send me a list of equipment you want me to set up downstairs and you can start coming in whenever to work. But also, I think you should probably take a week or two off first. You all look about two seconds away from collapsing.” 

“Yeah we’re pretty fuckin beat dude. But we’ll send you a list ASAP.” Jake said, taking a burning sip of the coffee. It singed his nerve endings and he couldn’t have been happier about it. 

Levi opened his mouth to speak again, when a voice filtered through the window to the loft above the store. 

“Yo Levi!” the person shouted “Can you please get off your fuckin ass and pick music to play? I know Wednesdays are your day to pick but if you take forever I’m just gonna put on whatever I want and you can suck it.”

All four boys' heads snapped up to the window to the loft, but whoever was up there couldn’t be seen. All they could see was that the loft had clearly gotten a makeover. What used to be an upper level where Levi stored surplus supplies now looked like it had a plush velvet couch, lava lamps and plants in it. 

“Alright alright! I’ll get on it.” Levi called back up, shaking his head and chuckling to himself as he walked toward the central sound system behind the counter to scroll through Spotify playlists. 

“Who the fuck is that and what have you done to the loft?” Josh asked, hopping up to sit on the counter. 

“That would be the very best thing that’s ever fallen into my lap. A.k.a my new store and venue manager Maven. She moved back to the area after living in Hollywood for a few years managing bands and she completely changed my life. We finally have consistent stock, a longstanding line up at the club and I have had the time to start photography again. Truly a godsend, if not occasionally a pain in my ass. She turned the loft into a breakroom of sorts.  There’s a couch and table up there now. She practically lives up there sometimes.” 

“Damn she must be some woman if she finally got you to get your shit together with that club.” Sammy piped up. 

“She’s hellfire, I’ll tell yah that.” Levi chuckled, finally hitting play on a playlist. The first bars of Surfin USA by the Beach Boys came on the surround system and matching groans came out of Jake downstairs and Maven upstairs. 

“Not this shit again!” Maven yells. Jake chuckled to himself. Hellfire indeed. 

“It’s my day to pick so suck it!” Levi called back before faux stage whispering to the boys “I mostly just play this to piss her off.”

Levi clapped his hands together once “Well boys, It’s close enough to five o'clock and I owe you a beer. Let’s head over to Little Fleet for some grub and beers and we can catch up.” 

Josh grimaced as he sucked down the last bit of his coffee before lobbing the empty cup into the trash at the end of the counter. “You still make shit coffee Levi.” 

“It’s the one thing I wouldn’t let Maven fix.” Levi said with a grin as all five men exited out the back door. 

                                                           ~0~

The boys took a week to relax, as per Levi’s request. They spent the days hiking the shore, kayaking and drinking beer around the fire. It had been way too long since they’d done this. The release of The Battle at Garden’s Gate had been exhilarating and the fans' response had been everything they’d hoped for. People seemed to love the album and they were all so proud. But with press interviews and touring, they hadn’t gotten more than a day or two to relax at a time. And they certainly hadn’t gotten a chance to get back to their favorite old haunts in years. 

They stopped by the store almost every morning for a cup of coffee strong enough to jumpstart their hearts. Sometimes Levi joined them on their escapades, and sometimes he stayed behind to help out at the store. The boys spent a few afternoons sifting through albums and strumming on some of Levi’s vintage guitars. 

Mostly they caught up on each other's lives. The boys recounted their more personal lives that happened outside the coverage of the album and Levi talked about the past few years of his life in Traverse City. Levi told them all about Maven and how she was practically his little sister. They laughed. They drank. They had a blast. 

The boys noticed Levi was a little on edge occasionally, typically when they heard someone shuffling upstairs or equipment moving around in the backroom of the shop. They assumed it was Maven but weren’t sure, since they had yet to see her in the flesh. A week from their arrival they were all sitting in lawn chairs in the alley behind the store, smoking cigs and drinking their coffee when Sam finally asked. 

“So, why haven’t we met your precious Maven yet? Hiding her from us or something?” 

Levi shifted a bit in his chair. “Um..” he coughed out a laugh. “I am actually. Yes. But it’s the other way around, I’m hiding you from her.” 

“Afraid she’ll fan-girl or something?” Josh commented as he ashed his cigarette.  

“In… a sense.” Levi coughed. “But in quite the opposite way you’re imagining.” 

“She’s a fan then?” Sammy piped up.

“She loves your music. A lot.” Levi sniffed and coughed again. “It’s a real safe haven for her. When she’s having a bad day I catch her upstairs laying on the floor smoking a J with sound cancelling headphones blasting your albums as loud as she can.” 

“Exactly how it’s meant to be enjoyed. With a joint in hand.” Jake chimes in.  

“Yeah..” Levi toes the asphalt a bit with his boots, but doesn’t continue.

“Soooo” Sammy drawls “Why can’t we meet her? We’re no stranger to super fans. I’m sure she’s cool.” 

“Um, well. It’s a bit complicated.” Levi heaves a sigh before flicking his cigarette butt into the coffee canister at the center of their little circle. “I suppose I can trust you guys. You’re friends. Do you remember the huge lawsuit that the band Undercover Heart went through last year? The one about the um” He coughs again, “Rape of one of their staff members by the lead singer Ryan?” 

“Yes. That shit was horrific man.” Danny spoke up. “I read all the details I could. They kept the poor girl's identity private but goddamn I felt so bad for her. She was a badass for filing that suit though.” 

“Yeah. She was.” Levi breathed. “So, this is strictly off record and if you repeat this to anyone I will skin you all alive, famous rock stars be damned.” 

“Jesus Levi.” Jake said. 

“It was her.” Levi choked out. “Maven. That’s why she ran back from Hollywood and ended up here. That dude messed her up and she just… she struggles with meeting famous bands now. You know how many people cycle through this joint writing stuff. She just… has a really fuckin hard time with it sometimes. Particularly bands she likes. I think it’s because once you meet someone, and in her case, discover how much of a monster they can be, their music isn’t… safe anymore.” 

“Fuck.” Jake said, flicking his cigarette into the canister. 

“Well I feel terrible for joking about her being a fangirl.” Josh mutters. 

“She just genuinely loves you guys a lot. I never really told her I was an old friend because I didn’t want her to be worried about y’all stopping by. I just know that if she knows you’re here she’ll take off and avoid coming by the shop as much as she can and not only do I need her here, but I think she needs the safety of the shop too. I didn’t want to wreck it.” Levi sighs again. “I know she’ll find out you’re here eventually, it’s inevitable. I just was a coward and didn’t want to break the news to her.” 

“She was a pretty well known band manager wasn’t she?” Danny asks. “She like… completely made Undercover Heart what it was. Before they hired her they were slated to be a one hit wonder but she hauled them into relevancy basically by her will alone.” 

“Yeah. She basically built that man's career for him. She gave him everything, and he took everything from her. If I ever see the man I’m liable to get my ass thrown in prison.” Levi mutters.

“I’ll help.” Danny says immediately. 

All five sit in silence for a few minutes, smoking the last of their cigarettes. When they’d all finished, they stood and stretched to head back inside the shop. 

“So yeah. Anyway, If you see her that’s fine, just… well now you have context for… her.” Levi says as he yanks open the door. 

A few steps into the back hallway, Levi suddenly halts, causing all four boys to nearly bash into each other. The front door to the shop had crashed open and there were footsteps stomping across the store toward the front desk. 

“Listen Levi,” Maven’s tense voice carried down the back hall. “I know Wednesdays are usually your day for music but I’m having an absolute shit fucking day so I’m playing Greta all day and there’s absolutely nothing you can fucking do about it, kapeesh?” 

The very opening chords of Edge of Darkness scratch through the speakers after she finishes her sentence and the boys all exchange a slightly amused look, grins spread on all of their faces. 

“Kapeesh.” Levi calls out to her. He spins and silently nods to the boys to head toward the back door. The boys attempt to be as quiet as they can as they creep toward the door. 

“Also, Levi?” Maven calls again. Everyone halts in their tracks. “You said there was a band coming in soon. Are they here yet? Do you need me to set up the backroom?” 

“Uh, yeah they’re here.” Levi squeaks. All five men share nervous looks. “They’re uh… up at the house.” He cringes at his lie. “I’m getting an equipment list from them today and then you can get started. 

“Cool cool.” Maven calls back. “Do you think I’ll like their stuff?” 

“Uh. Yeah.” Levi grins then. “I think you will.” 

“Wicked.” Maven calls back. 

All five men repress giggles as they skedaddle out the back door and into the alley. 

                                                        ~0~

The next morning the boys wake up to a group text from Levi. 

COME BY THE SHOP ASAP. COME IN BACK DOOR. HEAD DOWN THE STAIRS TO THE BOOTH. BE AS QUIET AS YOU CAN. 

A weird request, but they did as they were told. They all piled into the SUV they had rented and headed to the shop. Danny peeled open the back door as quietly as he could, and Sammy opened the door to the stairs. They tiptoed down and through the door at the end of the stairs that opened into the booth of a sound studio. Levi sat in front of all the mixing boards with a cup of coffee to his lips. He glanced over at them and softly said “coffees on the table.” 

“Why the weird text?” Jake asked. 

“Because of that.” Levi responded softly, pointing through the dark glass into the soundstage. 

The sound stage was littered with mismatched rugs, and a few milk crates that doubled as tables. There was a gorgeous seafoam green drum set toward the back wall and stands full of various guitars and basses. Along the left wall was a piano and a Mellotron set up exactly to the specifications Sam sent over. However, with all these beautiful instruments to look at that would normally catch their eye, it was the woman sitting on stool in the center, cradling a dark purple Fender guitar that made Jake stop in his tracks. 

Maven, Jake had to guess that’s who it was, was wearing checkered distressed pants, with a ripped up old band t-shirt cropped at her ribs, revealing a sliver of the rounded part of her stomach. Over top she was wearing an orange leopard print cardigan that ran down to her thighs. Around her neck was a series of long necklaces, and her wrists were adorned with interlacing leather bands. 

She was plucking out a melody with her eyes closed, rocking back and forth on the stool. Jake had seen countless numbers of people playing the guitar before. On the road, in the studio, studying old masters on YouTube. There was nothing overly special about the way she was sitting or playing, but he felt a little bit like he couldn’t breathe. 

“She never fuckin plays anymore man.” Levi whispered. “It felt like magic hearing music coming out of the basement this morning. I just felt like you should see it.” 

The melody she was playing was sad. Haunting is a better way to put it, and Jake couldn’t look away. Not even when Sammy placed a cup of burning hot coffee into his hands. She was moving her head along with her playing, the strands of her dark messy hair shaking back and forth. The group watched in silence as she played out the riff a few times, Levi cranked the volume of the mics in the space and they could hear her humming softly. 

“She has a strong presence.” Josh murmured. 

Maven suddenly stopped. Everyone froze as she heaved a sigh and stood from the stool to put the guitar back on it’s rack. 

“You in there Levi?” Maven said then. The boys still didn’t move a muscle. Jake’s head was spinning, having finally seen the face that went with the voice he’d heard in the loft for a week. She was beautiful. He couldn’t even really put his finger on why, but he couldn’t take his eyes off her. Even seeing her through the thick dark glass of the studio. 

Levi hit the button to the mic in the booth and responded “Yah.” He paused before adding. “Sounded good.” 

Maven snorted in a self-deprecating way and said “Thanks.” 

Levi hit the mic button again and said “You should play more.”

“Don’t push it Levi.” Maven snapped back. Levi released the button to his mic and let out a heavy sigh. “Can you check some levels on the lines for me? I think I have everything pretty good but I want to make sure before they get here today.” 

“Sure.” Levi replied. 

Maven pulled the amp cord out of the Fender she had been playing on and plugged it into another guitar, one more similar to the guitars that Jake regularly used while they wrote. 

“Are we looking for a punk or a rock-y sound?” Maven asked. 

“Um.” Levi hesitated. “Rock. Their sound is like…” He tossed a small smile over his shoulder at the boys. “Like Greta’s actually.” 

“Dope. I hope they’re not just copying the boys. They’ve got a mellotron in here and everything.” The boys smiled. She pounded out a few chords on the guitar. “Good?” 

Levi looked over at Jake for confirmation. Jake, who still had not taken his eyes off Maven, nodded. 

“Yeah, that should be good for raw sound. They can play with stuff too. They’re a pretty well educated bunch.” Levi called back.

“Thank god.” Maven snorted. “Not like that indie punk bunch you booked last month who needed me to do fucking all their sound mixing for them.” 

“Maven, I don’t think they kept asking you down here because they need help with their sound.” 

Maven just rolled her eyes at that.  

They repeated the process with each instrument, Levi silently asking for confirmation from the respective Greta member until they were sure the sound lines were all functioning properly. 

“Great work kid.” Levi called into the studio. 

“Ew don’t call me kid. I’m a 27 year old woman.” Maven called back. 

Levi chuckled. “You’re a kid to me.” 

“Whatever.” Maven muttered. “I’m gonna go take a walk along the beach. Smoke a little. Text me if they need me.” 

“Will do.” Levi called back. The boys all tensed, looking for places to hide, or to run up the stairs and back into the alley. Luckily, Maven took the back door out of the studio and up another hallway instead.

“Well boys, it’s all you.” Levi said. “Text if you need anything.” 

Sam piped up and said “Yeah actually, can you pick my brother’s jaw up off the floor?” 

“Jake see pretty lady play guitar and Jake brain break.” Josh teased. 

“You guys suck.” Jake grumbled. 

Levi cackled. “I thought you’d like her.”  

                                                        ~0~

Maven walked along the coast of the bay and absentmindedly smoked a joint. It was an overcast and drizzly day which meant there was no one around, which she preferred anyway. She was feeling on edge. The drizzle was very slowly building a small sheen of water on her arms and hair, but she didn’t mind. The cool water and gentle breeze combination was perfect. 

Maven sat her butt down in the sand and stared out at the waves. She normally wore headphones on her walks, her world was a near constant stream of music, but she had opted for silence today. 

Levi was being weird. He was edgy around her all week, sending her out every morning for tasks and disappearing without saying where he was going around 4:30 every day. She had come to the conclusion that whatever band was in town this week was a pretty big name. Or big enough that he was nervous about her being around them. She sighed. She hated when he tiptoed around her. Maven didn’t blame him. When she first started working at the shop she had had a couple pretty bad PTSD episodes that had scared the shit out of him. She owed him everything for staying with her, talking her down and making sure she was fed and had water when she got into one of her states. 

Levi was her best friend, to put it mildly. He cared for her, kept her safe and in return she busted her ass at his store making sure they had the best products, the best shows and that their artist getaway was something that people would go back and tell their friends about. She loved Levi like an older brother, and he cared for her like his little sister. She would forever be grateful to whatever power in the universe made her stumble into The Edge two years ago. 

She had been high out of her mind, as she had been most days after she came running back to Michigan with her tail between  her legs, and Levi had been struggling with an amp in the shop. She had walked in, spotted his struggle and didn’t even say a word to him, just walked over and fixed the wiring so that it was functional again. Levi had looked up from where he sat on the floor and said “You don’t happen to need a job do you?” 

The rest was essentially history. It only took two months of seeing him every single day, and him not letting her sour moods go by unnoticed, for her to spill her guts over some bourbon one night. About Ryan and Undercover Heart and how badly the whole situation fucked her up. How after she’d recorded her testimony she’d boarded the next flight to Grand Rapids and hightailed it up north. She came crash landing into Traverse City because she’d always loved it as a kid, and figured it would be a great place to start over. The small town she’d grown up in had too many people who knew her. 

He was extra careful with bands for a while. Never letting her be alone in a room with too many male band members, and carefully vetting everyone who came through. Eventually she told him off about treating her like a porcelain doll and he backed down a bit, giving her free reign over lots of the equipment set ups and giving her plenty of hours in the shop by herself. She was happy to do so, so Levi could focus on fixing up the artist house and starting his photography again. 

But he was still very gentle with her sometimes, and she’d always love him for it even when it pissed her the fuck off. 

Once she’d smoked the joint down to the roach, she tucked the end into her pocket. It was sacrilegious to litter near the lake. It was too precious to be fucked with. She meandered back toward the shop. Her plan was to grab her bag and head back to let her Pitbull, Stacy, out for a walk and pee. The girl had been cooped up all morning and Maven felt bad. 

She threw her whole body against the front door, as the latch often stuck, and the loud sound of the chimes clanged in the empty space. She rolled her eyes. Of course Levi left the shop unattended and unlocked. It was Traverse City, no one was gonna rob them, but what if someone wanted to buy something? 

She was humming softly to herself as she made her way around the edge of the counter and plopped down on the stool by the register. She whipped out her phone to ask Levi where he was. She had the message halfway typed when the door behind her, the one that led to the staff restroom, popped open. 

“You know, crime is especially low in this town but that doesn’t mean someone wouldn’t come in here and try to steal your precious coffee maker.” She tossed over her shoulder. 

“Oh.” Was all that came back. It was decidedly not Levi’s voice. Maven spun back quickly. 

“Sorry I…” But that’s as far as she got. She was suddenly face to face with Jake Kizska and all thoughts quickly left her brain. 

They both stared at each other for a long moment. Maven couldn’t quite figure out why he looked just as shocked to see her as she was to see him. He also almost looked afraid for some reason that Maven couldn’t figure out.

He was dressed in an outfit she’d seen him wear plenty of times. A black button up, half unbuttoned, loose fitting light wash jeans and a pair of well worn boots. His wrists were full of bracelets and his hair was longer than the last time she’d seen footage of their concerts, well past his collarbones at this point. 

“Hi.” Jake finally broke the silence. “I’m Jake.” He reached out his hand for a handshake. 

“I know.” Maven replied, and then coughed. Why did you say that you freak? 

Suddenly the front door bell chimed again, and Maven whipped her head to see Levi coming in the front door. She stood abruptly from her stool, skirted around Jake’s outstretched hand, and out from behind the counter. She scooped up her leather satchel on her way. 

She headed straight at Levi. He glanced over his shoulder and saw an apologetic Jake looking forlorn and lowering his hand back to his side. 

“Oh hey Maven-” 

“Hey dumbass, don’t leave the store unattended again. I’m going home to check on Stacy. Probably won’t be back for the rest of the day.” Maven spit as she stormed past him toward the front door. 

“Maven wait-” 

But she was already outside, the hinges bringing the heavy wood crashing back into the frame. The chime of the bells rang through the space. 

“Sorry.” Jake muttered. 

“Not your fault. I knew she’d find out eventually. Right now she’s probably just pissed I didn’t tell her. Which she has every right to be.” Levi sighed. 

After a few more beats of silence Jake spoke again. “Who’s Stacy?” 

Levi huffed a laugh. “That would be her Pitbull.” 

“Oh.” Jake said again. He felt crazy because his brain couldn’t come up with anything else to say. She was prettier up close. She smelled like the Lake and weed and sandalwood. He really wished she’d taken his hand. He shook his head trying to find his brain in it somewhere. 

The other three boys came clambering up the stairs and into the store. They all looked between Levi, who was still standing in the middle of the shop, and Jake behind the counter. 

“Are you two playing freeze tag or something?” Sam quipped. 

“Jake met Maven.” Levi responded. The boys' heads whipped toward Jake. 

“And… I’m guessing it… went well?” Danny questioned.

Levi finally walked back toward the counter. “She left for the day. This is on me. I should have told her y’all were here.” He snagged his keys from below the counter and walked toward the front door to lock up. “I’m closing early, boys. Let’s go get a beer.” 

“Kowabunga baby.” Josh said with a grin.  

                                                     ~0~

Maven sat curled up on her velvet couch, Stacy was her little spoon. There was incense burning, a bottle of wine open on the side table and a lit joint in the ashtray. She had changed into a giant t-shirt and boxer shorts. The soft sounds of John Denver playing off her record player. 

However, none of these things were easing her mind. 

She was pissed, mostly. At herself. At Levi. She was pissed he didn’t tell her they were coming. She was pissed that he felt he couldn’t tell her. She was pissed that she had acted like a freak in front of Jake. 

The anxiety was an endless pit in her stomach. She couldn’t go back there tomorrow. She couldn’t see any of those people. Not when she felt like this. 

She whipped out her phone and quickly shot a message to Levi, before chugging her whole glass of red wine and snagging the joint out of the ashtray. 

                                                        ~0~

Levi’s phone dinged on the table where all of the guys sat drinking beers and chatting. Levi glanced at it and quickly picked it up when he saw her name. 

“It’s Maven.” He said. 

“What did she say?” Jake asked, sitting up a bit in his chair. 

“Fuck.” Levi said, tossing his phone on the table, still unlocked. 

All four boys leaned in to read the screen. 

CASHING IN ALL MY VACATION DAYS. I’LL BE OUT FOR TWO WEEKS. 

“Fuck indeed.” Josh said, pounding back the rest of his beer.

[oveliagirlhaditright]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/33155107

Of all the people in the Hachiko Group, aside from Neku… the person that Joshua had always valued the most, was Rhyme. Neo spoilers.

The Joshyme here is platonic, but you can see it as romantic if you want.

Beam of Sunshine

Of all the people in the Hachiko Group, aside from Neku… the person that Joshua had always valued the most, was Rhyme.

And so, he supposed it was a good thing he’d brought her back to life, when he really hadn’t had to, then.

And there were a few reasons for that he did love her… It was for the fact that the clever girl could keep up with him (so much so that she had said she’d known he was the smart one in the Tin Pin universe, when he’d rightly called her out on being a traitor)… for her laughing at his jokes at her brother’s expense (though she did clearly love Beat more than anything)… and since they could think alike sometimes.

Joshua had heard Rhyme thinking during her week of the Game, that everyone in Shibuya’s values were trying to come in the loudest, much like how he had later said it was impossible for people to understand each other.

…Rhyme was also nice. Much too kind for her own good, really, and he hated to see when she got taken advantage of (and almost wanted to give her a stern talking to when these moments happened). And Joshua knew that that was a lot of the reason he adored about her, since part of the reason he’d wanted to destroy Shibuya was because of its sin, after all.

But the reason he was making himself known to the girl now? And preparing to compliment her? It was because he owed her, that’s why.

At the moment, Rhyme was buying herself an ice cream cone at Miyashita Park. And while Josh himself didn’t like the stuff, he thought Rhyme certainly deserved the treat, if she herself did. “All work and no play made Rhyme a dull girl,” like she had told Beat earlier in the week.

Making sure that no one was watching him, Joshua sat on the bench beside the younger Bito sibling, willed himself into the RG, and touched Rhyme’s hand, so that she would know he was there.

…Though he supposed he shouldn’t have done the latter, because that seemed to startle the girl more than anything. She nearly jumped forty feet into the air, Joshua thought (quite impressive, for a non-flier) and her heart rate had gone quite high. Joshua was almost worried she’d have to start playing the Game again, if it shot up any more, and that just wouldn’t do.

He held up a hand and offered her a small smile to try and calm her down. “Sorry to startle you, Raimu. I admit, I could have gone about that all a bit better… This whole thing I’m about to do is largely out of character, and I’m out of my depth.”

“C-can I help you, then?” Rhyme breathed. Her heart calming down, as she caught her breath and cautiously took a seat beside the Composer.

Joshua could hardly blame her for her caution. Because while they had hung-out a little bit in the past, it had been three years since they had seen each other last, really. And he doubted she remembered when she’d been soul fragments in Traverse Town.

“After all, two people working as opposed to one lightens the load!” Rhyme carried on.

Joshua smirked and “hmmed” at her comment. Because he could have expected that she would use an adage, but for some reason he never would have guessed she would have directed one at him. Was he becoming too human for her to have done that, or was he not enough human, that he thought the little ray of sunshine wouldn’t try to win him over with her words, too?

“Normally, Raimu, I would take you up on the offer. And it’s quite nice of you to ask… But not now, when what I’m here for is quite simple. Just know that I’m here to tell you… I’m proud of you. And these words don’t leave my mouth easily. I don’t think I’ve ever even spoken so candidly with Neku. But… while I don’t know if I necessarily want you hacking my Game ever again, young lady.”

And somehow, Rhyme had it within her to first look guilty for what she’d done, but then also challenging—as if thinking that she would do it again, if she needed to—and Joshua, despite himself, found himself respecting her all the more for it. He resisted the urge to pat her head, for the good little girl she was.

But she was so much more than that, too, wasn’t she? And that was why he was here.

Forming an arch with his fingers, and placing it over his forehead, Yoshiya continued on. “But you really helped to save the day. Shibuya would not be standing now, were it not for your efforts. And that is something. Hacking is not the dream you originally had. You lost your dreams—your original Entry Fee—but you didn’t wallow in despair, but instead filled in that hole with something new, and saved the day when duty called… And if I didn’t know any better, I’d be thinking that maybe I should be calling upon you when the UG needs someone, and not Neku anymore.”

Rhyme gasped at that. And while Joshua was very much not human—especially not now. The Composer had come out to play at this moment. Joshua had never meant to make that proposition to Rhyme… and to get “creepy”, and so “god of death-like”, as it were, but perhaps Yoshiya had all along—he could allow her being so human as to be shocked, as he tried to get a handle on this horrible situation he’d just screwed up, when he’d just come to give the poor kid a solid… not give her cardiac arrest. Really.

After she had gotten her breath once more, it seemed it was Rhyme’s turn to surprise Joshua. The girl’s ice cream was starting to melt: again, this was Joshua’s own fault, for having such a conversation with Rhyme, when she was eating such a substance. And he comforted himself in the fact that it was vanilla ice cream (white), at least, matching his shirt. If the disgusting, overly-sweet gelatinous stuff got on his top, as Raimu leaned towards him now, he should be able to get the stain out with his powers, just fine.

“…Not that I’d ever really want to go back to anything involving the Game, if I had the choice, Joshua. I enjoy being a hacker, thank you very much. And I think I might try to work for the NPA… I have been thinking about it some… and if it ever came down to it, I wouldn’t mind trying to ascend to try and help everyone, if I needed to. But only then! Because where there’s no light, be the light, right? Kind of like I was the other da-.”

And here Joshua had to put a hand to the girl’s lips to keep her from finishing that sentence. What a minx Raimu Bito was! Who would have guessed it?! Because, yes: the lonely part of him would have been far too happy to find a way to make her into an angel now, so he could have someone with him forever; it was the same way that he desperately wanted Neku to be his Conductor.

Well, Joshua supposed he deserved this temptation for getting as off-track as he had. He tried to grab control now—as he got off the bench, backed away from Rhyme, and bowed to her slightly… which was all too weird, because even this was how Japanese politeness worked (Joshua knew it well), he couldn’t help feeling, she should have been bowing to him, and not the other way around. But he would stifle that feeling. “I, uhh… apologize I guess, Rhyme Bito. Thank you again for your assistance. But do keep out of the RNS, unless I specifically ask.”

Rhyme had sobered up now, too. And was somehow gracefully licking at all the melting spots on her ice cream cone, to try and salvage it so she wouldn’t have a complete mess, before she waved at him, “And thank youfor showing up and helping us, Josh! I know Neku doesn’t show it that much—still more than he used to back in the day, though—but it meant more to him than you know… And thanks for what you did for Shoka and Rindo, too! Don’t be a stranger!”

And Rhyme beamed at Josh, being very much like the ray of sunshine he’d referred to her earlier.

And so… Joshua decided that maybe for that—for her… for all of the Hachiko Group, really—he could try and keep the life-and-death things to a minimum, and be a normal person people would appreciate around them, and show up to these events that Neku and Rhyme had invited him to.

“Yes, Rhyme… thank you, indeed.”

Author’s Note: So, for those who don't know, Joshyme was a pretty big deal in the fandom, back in the day.... 

And I guess I've brought it back in the year of our Lord 2021. But this might be the last fic I write for them. Or it might not. We'll see.And I kind of wrote this by accident? I wanted to write some Bito sibling stuff... but that'll come later. 

But Joshua and Rhyme's possible relationship (platonic) has always fascinated me, because I feel there's some interesting stuff there. And I think Joshua could potentially be proud of her for what she did, even after she lost her dreams.

Hope you all enjoyed?

[aerielz]

Cj/Toby - Fluff #4?

“Shut up and hold me.”

This was supposed to have been out yesterday. It was also supposed to be just around three hundred words. Guesstimates are not my forte.

I had no idea where to go with it, so it ended up taking an interesting turn. Hope it still counts as fluff? Thanks so much for the prompt!

It starts with something stupid that Josh says, as many things have for so long, now, and probably will for the rest of his life, if he’s lucky enough.

Toby pushes him into accepting a guest lecture at Columbia, claiming that a few days outside of DC might do him good, and he accepts it, much to his surprise.

He hasn't seen Josh in a while, and the distance makes itself clearer and more acute while he watches Josh take the stage and command the auditorium with an authority he's never displayed before. A kinder, softer, authority. He has a gentler hand, now, a more apt hand to steer questions into answers and world views into realities.

He's changed, and later, when Toby asks about Donna, he's made fully aware of how much she's changed too. How much Sam changed. He feels a little bit stranged, then. Far away from the new world they've made, far away from them. Even if Josh is right there in front of him.

He's alright— he really is. This loneliness, he's used to it by now. But he's been wondering, these days, if this is what Andy meant, so many years before.

Maybe the question is apparent, because Josh says—

“You should see someone."

He scoffs, “Are you really going to stand there and tell me a woman is the solution to my problems— unbelievable.”

Josh chuckles a laugh, “No— I mean. Well. It wouldn’t hurt to get out of the shell for once, you know—”

“Why are we having this conversation, again?”

“—but I mean a therapist.”

He huffs and grumbles, and says thanks but no thanks, and changes the subject, and two weeks later he’s sitting in a beautifully furnished room inside a brownstone somewhere uptown, listening as his new therapist tells him that it wasn’t healthy — wondering why the fuck it is that he decided to pay any sort of attention to Josh Lyman.

“Excuse me?,” he says, half laughing.

She shrugs, “It wasn’t.”

Only he doesn’t need anyone to tell him that, does he?

The White House, a traumatic experience? Of course not, he says, mouth full of barbed sarcasm, “I’ve only lost my family and the better portion of my reputation— not to mention any peace of mind I can claim to have ever had and whatever was left of my hair.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she deadpans, “you still have plenty of hair.”

“Thank you, but I think I’m still more interested in, you now, all the other stuff?"

“Well, can’t help you there. You said it yourself, that’s all gone.”

This type of frankness is something he’s more used to listening to in his own voice. And someone else’s, but he doesn’t want to think about her. He's managed to not think about her for months now, he’s not about to start.

“I see I’m getting my money’s worth of good life advice.”

“Toby—,” she says, leaning forward, ”it’s gone. It’s not coming back. And you knew that would happen when you leaked the—”

“This is not about that.”

“—but I think it is. I think it is and if you want me to help you then you have to stop trying to bullshit me,” she says, dead serious, but with an amused smile on her lips. “Otherwise we’re in for fifty minutes of verbal sparring a week and I'm sure you’ve had eight years too many of that.”

It's after the first month that he allows himself to picture her face again. It's a memory. The day she found out.

"Once you said you lost your family," his therapist says that week.

"Yeah," he answers, "in more ways than one."

"What do you mean?"

And that's how he learns a thing or two about opening up and about emotional honesty. That easily. By just deciding to.

He hates it. Almost makes the decision to go back, too.

Then he calls Andy for the first time in seven months, instead of the other way around—

"Tobias!," she says, before he can get a word in, "I couldn't understand shit of what you wrote in that last article, but I'll applaud any attempt at academically calling out congress on our bullshit. When's the next one due? Oh, and Huck and Molly are going nuts about the whole summer in New York thing, won't shut up about it."

— and wonders if his isolation wasn't a little bit self inflicted.

"Just because what you had is gone, doesn't mean you can't have something else," his therapist says. "Don't you have a new reputation, now? Haven't you found some peace again?"

"Hair's still gone."

"Well, you said you preferred the other things."

Can't have everything, he says, he thinks, to himself and remembers of her voice.

"No, no, you can," his therapist answers, having heard him very well, "Just can't have the same thing twice."

It takes him years to understand that one. It takes a beautiful, blue, envelope in his desk, his name written on it in fancy calligraphy.

It takes seeing Josh place his hands on the small of Donna's back, like he's watched him do so many times. It takes Donna's exasperated smile, her eye roll, the naked affection playing in Josh's face. The slender ring on their fingers that's somehow a contrast to the walls of the East Wing ballroom. It takes everything that's always been there being now so completely different.

It takes the sight of her, coming from the other side of the room in a green dress that makes her tanned skin shine golden.

The pain of longing is there, surrounding his heart, threatening to wash over him, but he finds it that he likes what the distance did to them. There's a lightness to him that wasn't there before. And her smile is brighter, somehow.

They walk towards each other like drawn by gravity — naturally, inevitable, painlessly.

"Oh, God, I missed you," he lets out with a laugh.

She laughs, too. CJ laughs the laugh of recognition, and it's light and beautiful and a little bit shy, and he's falling in love with her again before he can even name the feeling.

"I don't think I've ever heard you say something like that so openly," she comments. He finds himself shy, too. It's a delicious feeling, the giddy happiness that washes over him. “Who are you and what have you done to—”

“Just— shut up and hold me, will you?," he retorts.

She steps into his arms, sinking into the warmth of his embrace. He encircles her tight, fitting himself around her and remembering the size of her against him like he would a rhyme from a childhood song. Uncertainly, bathed in tentative affection.

"Gladly," she says, against his neck.

The familiarity of it clashes with his newfound internal honesty, with the walls of the White House, with the reality that he doesn't owe anyone anything. "Don't let go."

"Wasn't planning to."

She clings to him, a little bit, unashamed to do so.

And he likes it best. Whatever this new thing is that he has now, he thinks he likes it best.

[misssophiachase]

For @klarolinefallbingo “Did you have to upset the goblins?”  

A/N Thanks to @helpfulfairy for giving me some supernatural tips that were so useful to make this happen : ) 

Mission Impossible?

Kol Mikaelson, the youngest prince of the underworld, is being held captive in the forbidden forest by an army of vengeful goblins. Two separate rescue missions are launched. One by a mysterious mercenary hired by the King and the other his older, and very suspicious brother. Who will come out victorious and what secrets will be revealed along the way? 

I

Yes, he’d upset the goblins. 

So much so that the young prince found himself captive in the deep, dark depths of the forbidden forest. 

Goblins weren’t considered a threat in the supernatural order of things but, at the same time, they could easily be underestimated. Although, the possibility they had joined forces with one of their bigger enemies couldn’t be dismissed either. 

“Your highness.” Klaus turned to see his servant mid greeting. Josh was young and inexperienced but at least he’d mastered his technique. “I come bearing news.”

“Well, how about less bowing and more talking. What news do you have of my brother from the capital?” 

The ruling family oversaw the entire realm and resided in the heavily guarded capital. Klaus, however, had recently taken up a posting in the northern region in order to quell rising tensions against the heirachy. 

This latest attack on his brother seemed too much of a coincidence, even if he probably did do something idiotic to deserve it. Kol was the black sheep of the family and their relationship was strained at times. Although, that didn’t mean he wasn’t anxious about his fate given he was missing. 

Abducted. 

Goblin fodder, according to Rebekah. His sister, the princess, never did possess much empathy or tact. 

“The King is displeased it has come to this,” Josh recited. No surprises there given Mikael was never happy and made his sentiments known on a regular basis. “He wants this dealt with quietly and swiftly so has contracted a highly trained mercenary to track down the prince.”

“This is father’s great plan?” He growled. Klaus was trying to remain composed but this latest news was doing nothing to ease his concerns. As much as Kol frustrated him, Klaus had no intention of leaving his rescue up to a questionable stranger whose loyalty could be bought. 

“I understand that the mercenary in question possesses the requisite skills for this kind of mission.” 

“I’ll be the judge of that,” he replied gruffly. “Do you know this mercenary?”

“No, Your Highness,” Josh replied. “All I know is that he is well trained in tracing, combat and speaks fluent Ghukliak.”

The language of goblins. Not many outside their close knit circle could speak it let alone were fluent.

Klaus felt his chest constrict, his instincts telling him he was right to question his father’s motives and that the supposed mercenary probably wasn’t who they purported to be.

Klaus knew someone who fitted that description. 

Someone he loved probably more than he should. 

But it was a she not a he. 

She was brilliant, that much he knew from their time together. She spoke multiple languages and dialects. In fact, they’d met when she worked as a translator at their annual summit which brought together representatives from all supernatural orders.     

He also knew she was handy with a weapon given that time she ‘accidentally’ stabbed him in the foot during an impromptu and mock fencing battle. Well, afterwards she maintained it wasn’t an accident because he was being an ass. Rather than incensing the hot blooded prince it only made him want her more. 

And more. 

But they were from two different worlds, so much so that their possible union would be considered a curse that could bring down the ruling heirachy and everyone they presided over.  

Suddenly, all of the good memories were replaced, not by their wretched circumstances, but by a renewed and sickening fear for her safety along with his brother. 

“Bloody hell,” he cursed aloud, unable to help himself. 

This was not a game, so what was she playing at? 

“I’m sorry, my lord, is there something I can do...”

“Summon Elijah and prepare the horses. We’ll be leaving at first light.” Elijah had been visiting when Kol disappeared, so Klaus figured the least he could do was lend a helping hand, especially given what they faced.

“But the King.” 

“Not a word, Josh, if you value your life,” he hissed, spinning on his heel and leaving the room without a backward glance.  

II

“I think my behind has gone to sleep.” Caroline rolled her eyes wondering not only why she’d opted for a companion but chosen this particular one. The fog was thick in these parts and for once she was glad her friend couldn’t properly gauge her reaction. 

Caroline was trying to tell herself she made the right decision. Katherine Pierce was a revered witch in these parts so was more than qualified for the mission but every minute they rode and every single complaint was telling her otherwise. 

“Luckily you’re not doing the work then is it?”

“I’m doing plenty.”

“Complaining doesn’t count.”

“I’m heartbroken, the least you could do is give me some pity,” she growled. Before Caroline could reply she continued. “In case you’re wondering, that means my most vital organ has been shattered into a trillion, tiny pieces.”

Drama really should have been her middle name. 

Caroline wanted to be that supportive friend who knew the right thing to say. Unfortunately, she’d had her most vital organ broken too and, not that she’d admit it to anyone, still hadn’t fully recovered. Well, not enough to give any helpful advice. 

“He’s not worth it,” she offered mechanically, thinking that line had been thrown at her enough times.

“I beg to differ.”

“You’ve never even mentioned anyone and now suddenly he’s the love of your life?” 

“What can I say? It all happened very quickly.” Caroline knew that feeling all too well. “He’s not my type at all so I wasn’t expecting it to hurt so much.”

“So, who is he?” Her friend gave her a look which said she wasn’t going to divulge his identity anytime soon. “Fine, then you can stop whining and let me concentrate.”

“Why are you doing this?” The question wasn’t completely unexpected but at the same time it was a difficult one to answer. “Not to mention pretending to be some kind of mercenary which we both know you’re not.”

“I have the skills required,” she argued.

“But mercenaries don’t possess loyalty or hold allegiances, nor do they care for anyone but themselves. We both know you are far good to be that way.”

“I might have misrepresented myself, true, but let’s just say I owe someone.” 

She’d been the one to leave in the middle of the night, to flee when their circumstances became too difficult. Caroline knew he would have fought to the death for her and a life together. 

She knew if she couldn’t give him that then the least she could do was help his younger brother. Someone she’d grown fond of in the short time they’d spent together. It wouldn’t fix them but she hoped it would make some amends at least.  

“You gamble? That I wasn’t expecting,” she offered. Caroline wanted to correct her but thought better of it. 

“Maybe I liked you better when you were complaining about your love life.”

“Fine, if I tell you his identity it stays between us.” Clearly they were back to her mystery man and Caroline was immediately regretting her clumsy segue. “Promise?”

Caroline only nodded by way of response, there was only so many theatrics she could take in one day.

“It’s Prince Elijah.” 

Caroline’s head flicked around to face her friend. Now that she wasn’t expecting, even if she did know him. She needed to conceal her surprise. “Well, now it makes sense that prince of the underworld isn’t your usual type. How did this all come about or do I not want to know?”

“We met purely by accident on the streets of the capital. He’s handsome, yes, but it was something else.”

“Let me guess, some imaginary magnet was pulling you towards him.” 

Caroline knew that feeling all too well when she’d been with a certain prince that happened to be his very own brother. 

“And how do you know that exactly?” She’d clearly said too much. 

“Uh, so, how exactly did he break your heart then?”

“He had to leave the capital on assignment. I must admit finding out you wanted help rescuing Kol Mikaelson seemed like a weird coincidence.”

“Does Elijah know?” Caroline did not need that complication. She knew Elijah and that, although they quarrelled, he was extremely loyal to Klaus. If he found out Caroline was on a mission to rescue Kol he wouldn’t let that stand. 

“Of course not,” she replied. “Although I did tell him I had business with you and I could have sworn I saw a flicker of recognition in his eyes. Do you happen to know why that would be?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Caroline could have kicked herself for being such a bad liar. 

“Okay, so tell me about this debt you owe, it’s the least I deserve.”

This was going to be difficult to explain without giving everything away. 

III

“I thought father said there was a mercenary rescuing Kol?” Elijah asked as they made their way through the forest the following day. 

“Well, if you’re not up to it, older brother,” Klaus responded emphasising the word ‘older’ on purpose.

“I was merely pointing out that it seems excessive given we are currently fighting wars on multiple fronts. But Kol does like to be the centre of attention so will appreciate the added effort, I’m sure.”  

That last part Klaus couldn’t argue with. 

“I’ll be sure to tell Kol you said that after we save his sorry ass,” Klaus joked before growing serious again. Something had been playing on his mind since he found out the possible identity of his father’s chosen ‘mercenary’. “Do you trust Mikael’s intentions?”

“Is that a rhetorical question, Niklaus?” 

“I find this whole situation unsettling. It seems all too much of a coincidence that father has sent us outside the capital and now Kol is missing. You don’t think that he...”

“What? That he Is trying to kill the heirs to the throne and his very own children? Mikael has many faults and he’s certainly not going to win father of the year but I think you’re being a tad ridiculous.”

“I know I’m the cynical one but think my suspicions are justified.”

“And what makes you think that?” Klaus hesitated briefly. He had no intention of mentioning Caroline, not yet, but when it came to her he couldn’t contain his feelings or his composure for long.

“I believe the mercenary father hired is Caroline.”

“Forbes?” He questioned dubiously. “Why would you think that?”

“She speaks multiple languages, a skill the very mercenary possesses.”

“Well, last time I checked she isn’t a mercenary but fallen fae royalty.”

“Watch how you talk about her, brother.” Klaus growled. He couldn’t help the over protectiveness, it just seemed to envelop him when anyone spoke adversely against her. Even after she left him he still couldn’t let her go. 

“Finally,” he acknowledged. “I admit I only said that to incite you, Niklaus, given she was the best thing to ever happen to you.”

“That I don’t need to revisit, brother. But we both know that nothing good could come from our union.”

“Remind me, was that before or after she stabbed you?”

“Elijah has a sense of humour who would have thought that?” Klaus drawled. “Clearly I’ll never live that incident down but right now, given present and urgent circumstances, it doesn’t matter.” 

“I must admit, I’ve been distracted.” That Klaus wasn’t expecting. His brother was the epitome of law and order and not much more. 

“I’m almost too scared to ask.”

“There’s a woman.”

“And here I thought you were celibate for life,” he chuckled. 

“Hilarious, Niklaus,” he shot back. “Although, given our brief discussions, apparently she’s travelling with the very girl you are pretending not to seek.”

Klaus was struggling to control himself. Not just because he wanted to kill Elijah for dropping that clue without warning but because the thought she was close only made him want her more. 

TBC - You Reap What You Sow for @klarolinefallbingo

[ravens-words]

to have and to hold

Written for @thebuckleysiblingsweek Day 3: “I can't believe you're getting married!” + fluff

.

Maddie squinted, and knocked clumsily on the door. She swayed in place and would've fallen to the floor if she hadn't steadied herself with a hand on the door.

Which was the exact moment her brother decided to open the door.

She tumbled inside, and instead of hitting the floor, she ended up colliding with his chest. He put his arms around her more securely, and she snuggled into his arms. Maddie felt his rumpling laugh against her cheek and found herself giggling.

"You are so wasted," he told her, still laughing.

She pulled back and pointed a finger at him. "I'm just a little tipsy," she protested. "A tiny bit."

"Aha. Come on, let's get you to bed." He hugged her to his side, and kept her from tripping and falling face first multiple times as they made their way up the stairs.

The first sight that greeted her was her daughter asleep in her crib. "Aww, my baby," she whispered as she moved towards her. "I thought she was gonna spend the night with mom and dad," she frowned.

She coould tell, even through the haze of alcohol, that her brother seemed a bit sad; or maybe angry?

"Buck?"

"I think she's just not used to them, Mads. Mom called me a couple of hours ago and told me Ami wouldn't go to sleep, kept asking for you or Chim. I went instead. Didn't tell you cause I didn't want either of you to worry."

She cocked her head to the side and watched him. He seemed a bit nervous, as if he expected her to be angry at him, which was the farthest thing from how she was feeling right now.

"Thank you," she told him softly, her hand on his arm. "For looking out for her, for both of us. Thank you for being there."

He smiled. "Always."

She put her hand on his cheek and rubbed the skin there, and he leaned into her touch.

"Will you walk me down the aisle?"

"What?" He spluttered, obviously surprised and she repeated the question patiently. "Mads- I- but dad's here."

"I've seen dad about four times in the last year, and that's including the video calls." She cleared her throat, and hoped to God the words coming out of her mouth actually made sense. "You've been there for me from day one. You saved me, Buck-"

"That was all you, Maddie," he interrupted her gently.

"I may have been strong enough to run away from Doung, but you gave me a place to run away to. And then you gave me a reason to stop running, to put down roots. It's because of you that I met the love of my life, and it's because of you that I get to marry him exactly one week from now. Through it all, you were my saftey net."

A tear slid down her cheek and he moved to wipe it away. He wasn't actively crying, but his eyes were glassy and red. "I love you little brother."

He pulled her into a tight hug. "Love you too, sis."

"So," she drawled out as she pulled away, smiling and trying to lighten the mood. "What do you say? Will you walk me down the aisle tomorrow?"

He chuckled. "Well, since you asked so nicely-"

She rolled her eyes and playfully punched his arm.

"I'd love to, Mads."

.

She smoothed her hand down the front of her wedding dress, turning thos way and that, and fiddled nervously her ring.

There was a knock on her door, and she turned just in time to see the stunned look on her brother's face as he saw her in her wedding dress. "Maddie-"

She grinned and did a half twirl. "How do I look?"

He came inside and closed the door behind him. "You look beautiful." Her smile widened. "And you look really, really happy."

"I am, Buck. I never-" she shook her head and he put his hands on both her shoulders.

His smile was gentle, and understanding, but then it morphed into something more playful. "I can’t believe you’re getting married. Again."

She smacked his arm and shook her head. "I honestly can't believe it either."

"Are you nervous?"

"A little bit," she admitted. "But I'm mostly really excited to be married to Howie, you know?"

"No, I've never been excited to marry Howi- ow, Maddie."

She poked him in the chest. "You deserved that."

He rubbed his arm in an exaggerated manner, then he dropped the act and grinned and she could practically feel how happy he was for her, and it made her heart full. "Thank you for being here."

"Nowhere else I'd rather be."

She smiled. "Where's Ami?"

"She's with Christopher."

Maddie smiled and shook her head. "I think he might be her favorite person."

Buck laughed softly. "He probably is." His phone pinged with a text and he looked down to read it. "Mom and Dad are here. You've spoken to him, right? About me walking you down the aisle?"

"I did it the Buckley way," she admitted.

"Ahh," he nodded with a teasing smile. "Hit and run, huh?"

She laughed, even though she felt like she shouldn't. "Kind of, yeah."

"Knock, knock!" Josh poked his head in, his smile widening when his eyes landed on Maddie. He entered the room filully and pulled her into a hug. "Maddie- you look beautiful."

"Thank you."

He put his arms on her shoulders and grinned. "It's time. Everyone's out there, and we're all waiting on you."

She blew out a breath, and found herself giggling excitedly, any previous anxiety evaporating.

Josh hurried out, leaving her and Buck alone once again. He offered her his arm, bent at the elbow, and she looped hers through it. His free hand settled on top of hers and he looked down at her, eyes filled with unshed tears. "You ready for this, sis?"

She beamed up at him. "Yes."

.

Walking down the aisle this time didn't feel like the ending of one life and the start of another, it was more along the lines of making an already great life just a little better. Her hands were shaking this time, not because she was afraid, but because she was excited. The only bruises underneath her dress and make up came from bumping into a door at 2 am to get to her daughter, and not from her future husband's heavy hands.

When she looked at him, he was staring at her in awe, his mouth taking on the shape of an O, and the clear appreciation in his eyes had her blushing.

Buck's hand tightened on hers, and once they got to the small three steps, he took it and placed it in Howie's.

The sound of little feet running, broke the hush of silence, and just before her daughter crashed into her legs, Buck swooped in and carried the little girl in his arms, tickling her. Ami giggled loudly, and everyone else followed suit. Buck hefted her up and put her on his shoulders, which she absolutely loved because it made taller than everyone else in the room. Maddie caught his eyes, and gave him a small smile, which he returned with a wink.

When she turned back to Chimney, she found that his eyes were also on Buck and Ami, but they shifted to her almost immediately. His smile was wide, making his eyes crinkle, and she felt an ache in her heart with how much she loved him.

She grinned and mouthed an I love you, and he did the same.

Maddie had honestly never been happier, save for the day their daughter had been born.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today..."

[gifted-burnout-archive]

Jim’s Best Friend

Part Eleven - How Time Flies

Word Count: 2222

Author’s Note: Big time jump time! Whoop! Also, to those on my tag list: I’ve put you down below but I don’t know if you’ll get the notification or not. I tried reading up on it, something about accounts being hidden by some setting or other... IDK, hope you still see this ok!

WARNING: none.

For previous chapters click here.

March, 2007.

A lot can happen in a year, well, ten months.

And despite phone calls and emails back and forth between you, Jim and Pam, there was a lot you missed.

After Casino Night, Jim had transferred to Stamford within a week, taking on their Assistant Regional Manager position, and after some careful consideration, Pam called off the wedding, and broke up with Roy. It was a shock for everyone including Pam, but after what happened with Jim, she realised two things:

1. She wasn't in love with Jim. 2. She didn't love Roy either.

You had helped her move into her new apartment, which was coincidentally the one you were packing up. Jan had talked to Corporate for you, and you had been selected as one of Dunder Mifflin's foreign agents, and you packed your stuff up into storage a day after Pam's cancelled wedding, and flew out to Vienna that evening.

Jim started dating one of the girls from the Stamford branch, Karen, Pam started back at art classes, taking the Dunder Mifflin designer course in New York on weekends, Ryan and a new temp took over your and Jim's spots on the sales team, Dwight got even more annoying (as reported by Pam). You had developed and quit a smoking habit at least twice, and spent the past 300 days flying from Berlin to Paris to Madrid to wherever else, collecting a small but secure list of European clients. But you all kept in touch as best you could, all doing your best to move on and up.

Things started changing when Josh from Stamford got a job at Staples. Necessary downsizing was going to close the Scranton branch permanently, but the departure meant Stamford ended up closed instead, and their staff were transferred to Scranton, reuniting Jim and Pam after months apart. Jim had phoned you about it months ago, waiting until you were at work in Madrid to call.

"Halpert? Isn't it like, 11 at night back home?" You asked, typing away at your computer as you spoke, pulling out a dictionary to remind yourself of a French phrase.

"I'm back at Scranton... And I saw Pam and, well..." He stopped, but you could hear the grin in his voice. "I've moved on. Officially. Karen and I are doing great and now, Pam and I are actually back to where we were. Friends..."

"I'm really happy for you Jim... It took a lot of you, she knows that." You smiled, glancing over to your colleague Miguel, who tapped his arm. You glanced at the clock. "Shit, I've gotta head for a meeting. Can I talk to you tonight?" You asked.

"Sure... We need to get you back on US soil, Y/N. Doesn't feel the same here without you." Jim said softly, and you bit your lip.

"About that..." you muttered, but Miguel was getting impatient. "Got to go! Love ya, bye!" You set the phone back on the receiver and grabbed your coat, rushing after Miguel to your next business meeting.

—

"Do I think it's unfair that Y/N got to go to Europe?" Dwight looked into the camera. "Of course I do. Not only was the job never publicly advertised by Dunder Mifflin, they sent her to the home of my ancestors without so much as a thought of me. Dwide Shroode, my great grandfather, was a man of great honour in Europe."

"Are you going on about Europe again? Dwight, she went to Spain... And we're all pretty sure your great grandfather was a soldier under Hitler during the war." Pam called from her desk, and Jim chuckled.

"He was a war hero!" Dwight said in defence.

"Criminal... Losing side become war criminals." Jim corrected with a wink to the camera.

—

"Había sido un placer hacer negocios con usted, señor." You said with a smile, shaking hands with the client, following Miguel out of the room.

"You were right to wear that top..." Miguel muttered as you both headed out to the waiting car. You were fast approaching a year as an international agent, and Miguel had been there since day one.

"Wow. Thanks Miguel." You rolled your eyes, and the pair of you stopped before breaking into laughter. "Fuck yes I was right. At least half my clients are with us because of my rack." You chuckled, getting into the car.

"Ready for the Vienna meeting?" He asked, the car pulling out and starting the trip to the airport. Your bags were in the back, your files from the temporary office packed up for you by an intern.

"If it leads to what I think is happening, then yeah... Scouting for a year is long enough." You commented, and Miguel nodded. He was from Spain, brought on by Dunder Mifflin from a third party company to help out with convincing new clients: he knew the right restaurants, the local dialect, the customs. When you had arrived, he spent a week running you through things you should be doing to secure clients.

"I'll miss you when you go." He said decidedly, and you smiled back at him, relaxing into your seat. It really had been a great year. When you were about halfway to the airport, you phone rang, and Miguel slipped in a pair of earphones so as to not eavesdrop.

"Hola, esta es Y/N de Dunder Mifflin. ¿Como puedo ayudar?" You answered the phone, only to hear English on the other end.

"Y/N, it's Jan."

"Oh, hi Jan. What do I owe the pleasure?" You switched to English, your smiling disappearing when you heard her sigh.

"I just got word... The Vienna meeting isn't looking like good news for you." She sighed, and you sat up.

"I... I've made more sales than anyone else in the Europe group..."

"I know. I know... I wanted to phone, in case they tried some stunt and let you go now that they are closing the division." She said slowly, and you nodded, trying to think.

"Why are they closing us down anyway?"

"The company took at gamble with the project to begin with, and want to shift one of our branches in the north east into an international business headquarters, teach the staff already there how to deal with the clients you've amassed." Jan explained. "Money's tight, and Upper Management can't reason a new branch opening in Vienna."

"And I'm not being moved to the International Headquarters?"

"The chances are slim..."

"Then, what do I do Jan? If they let me go here and I don't get transferred..." You started to panic, and Miguel glanced over, now concerned.

"Y/N, Y/N... Don't worry, I'll be looking on your behalf. Just... Just get through today, and fly back here the minute the meeting is over. We'll sort it out in New York, ok?" Jan assured you, and you thanked her before ending the call. Jan was your corporate contact, and after she had got you the position in Madrid, she had been keeping you up to date with decisions made back home. Up until then, everything had been looking positive for the Europe branch. It was out of the blue, but at least you knew now. You could expect the worst.

"Everything ok, Y/N?" Miguel asked, and you sighed.

"I'll be in New York by the morning..." You said, and he nodded, understanding that the worst was coming. You both fell silent after that, through the drive to the airport, and security, and on the plane. You needed to think over your next steps, and spent the time on the plane writing in a small notebook, drafting a CV, just in case it was needed.

—

"Michael, Michael please..." Jan spoke over the speaker phone, interrupting Michael's corny opener. "This is about Y/N."

"Oh right, how is the traitor?" Michael asked, still pissed off by your leaving the Scranton branch. Jim overheard Michael and Jan, and ended his call, leaning back to listen in through the ajar door.

"They are shutting down the Europe project, and I realise the merger has filled up all the vacancies in your office, but I'm looking for some options for her." Jan said, and Jim beckoned Pam over to listen in.

"You shouldn't-" Dwight started, but the pair shushed him.

"She betrayed me... But wouldn't you just put her in with corporate?" Michael whined, and Jan let out a loud, long sigh.

"The information I have is that... Well, they're laying off the entire Europe team. Giving their work to the Rochester branch. Quick and easy way to save money." Jan admitted, and Jim and Pam shared a look.

"Even if we did have space in Scranton, we wouldn't want her Jan." Michael said quickly, lifting the phone and ending the call. He noticed the shuffling outside his door, and got up, flinging the door open to see Jim and Pam scrambling back to their desks, pretending they hadn't heard a thing. He looked around for a few more moments, shutting his room door and hiding himself inside.

The moment he was gone, Jim walked up and over to Pam. "Pam, you helped arrange Y/N's flights out, didn't you?" Jim asked, and Pam nodded. "Think you could find out when she's getting home? We could go meet her at the airport?" Jim suggested, and Pam smiled brightly.

"I'll see if I can find the info. You send her an email, see what she says about the whole thing. We need to know how down in the dumps she is." Pam ordered, and Jim tapped into her desk, heading back over to his computer, smiling over to Karen as he sat down.

They had been based in Scranton for a little while now, started dating, and Jim had explained his old feelings for Pam. And Karen understood, all of it. In fact, they were better than ever now. She came over after a half hour or so.

"So, tonight... You free?" She asked, leaning on his desk. Jim stopped typing and gave her a smile.

"I can't tonight, Pam and I are going to pick up an old friend from the airport... Do you want to come?" Jim offered, and Karen shook her head.

"It's fine, but you owe me, Halpert." She smirked, heading over to her desk.

—

And just like that, you were out of a job.

Corporate had tried to be nice about it, sure, and offered a severance package, but what you wanted was somewhere to work. If your life had gone differently, then severance and a chance to stay in Spain or Austria for the rest of your life would have been great, but you had only ever had Dunder Mifflin.

No college, no family. You barely scraped through high school and now all you had to your name was a suitcase of personal effects and eight years or so with a company that was downsizing. And as much as you wanted to believe that loyalty, dedication and language skills were going to get you a job, it was more likely that you would end up working in a fast food restaurant and couch surfing.

Jim had sent an email, telling you he had heard, but you didn't even have the energy to respond.

Your flight home was long, and you spent most of it staring out a window and picking at airplane food, wondering how in the name of God you would move forward from this. Maybe Jan had an idea, she had been a mentor to you while you were away, offering sound advice in times of trouble.

It's not like you could even go back to Scranton. The Stamford Merger had bulked out the workforce, there was more of a sales team in that Pennsylvania branch than there was in the whole Europe project. And you weren't looking to be squeezed in out of pity. You had self-respect.

After a sleepless flight, and landing at JFK as the clock struck 11 that night, you didn't feel good about being home. You didn't feel good about anything.

You grabbed your bags, your phone flashing with voicemails from Jan and a text saying she would talk to you tomorrow as you turned it back on. A drink would be nice, but terrible for the morning to come. A fresh set of clothes wouldn't kill you...

You stopped off at the bathroom, searching through your case to find a nice top and jeans, changing into something that made you feel more comfortable. You let your hair down out of the tight bun you had locked it in, and took a moment to look in the mirror.

Things had changed in a year. You had dyed your hair a little darker, your skin had tanned, you had lost some weight. The bags under your eyes were too visible, so you quickly shuffled through your makeup and pulled out some concealer, and tidied your face a little.

Maybe a drink would be good, stop having to flirt in Spanish... You fastened your suitcase back up and headed out, dragging your suitcase behind you and heading for the exit into the main airport building.

"Y/N!!" Two voices shouted, and you turned only to be tackled into a tight hug, two sets of arms wrapping around you and cementing you as officially 'home'.

--

Tags: @imsuperawkward​ @rosie2801 @onceuponahuntersrealm 

[startwithbrooklyn]

THE GREAT ND REWATCH OF 2021 / SEPTEMBER 30, 2019 // larkspur lane/the whisper box

this post is a double whammy cause they have 2 eps happen in the same day if u can believe it (thats how awful judging timelines in this show is!!)

-"hi josh..." LMAOOOOOOO

-BESS just breaking in lmaooo how many god damn times does bess just shit the bed in this show

-LOVE her frowny face at nancys closet ("my expectations are low" lmfaoooo but this would totally be me)

-"bet she meant it metaphorically" okayyy but then why did lucy say that at all? i feel like theres defo more to this story, combined with josh's cagey behavior (part of which is to get nancy to stop looking into shit d/t him and karen but still)

-"they dont accept visitors unless they're family" .....🙂

-ace "youre really good at that" to bess i fuckin love this friendship with all my heart (also love their talk at the claw mirroring nick & nancys talk in the last ep)

-also PINK AND ORANGE BESS ARE U BLIND (also 1) why tf would nancy own this and 2) where would she wear it??)

-okay wtf is vampire dip

-"boss??" see this is what i meant yesterday about nancy ruining everything for nick/george

-god DAMN she sucks at dealing with this news lmaooo that emotional competency babey + love george literally agrees to help bc she feels bad (AND nicks immediate look of "you just reprimanded me for helping her last ep and i know why youre doing this rn" lmaoooo)

-LOVE george noticing nick "shout out to jean valjean" lmaooo once again nancy would never have noticed/commented on something like that

-"get the hell out of here" was this foreshadowing for an epic dad joke for these two eps? "how do you make holy water? you boil the hell out of it" 😂😂😂😂

-so what i dont get about the whole haunting is the ball + kids' laughter but its all the emphasis on "mr roper" the adult? wtf like what kind of entity is this

-"how did you ever have a solo career??" 😂

-okay amaya's hair is gorgeous here (also "you feel like a snack" ....👀) *ahhh so the reason bess feels so off balance is bc its like a top vs a top scenario

-has anyone who's ever been to prison confirmed this is what it looks like?

-love how ace is the only employee there when they all leave so he had to fucking close the place when he goes

-why does she take the whole file? time constraints? it'd be smarter to take pics + replace it (better sleuthing) but this place is clearly not well run anyway 😂

-so this is a pretty decent cover she invents but theres no way she would get away with it so easily for a real guard

-love how ace recognizes ryan's car (+ is able to find it by driving around)

-"my father wouldnt do anything like that" LMFAOOOOOO SIS WHY ARE U DEFENDING HIM ironically, ace is actually the best person suited to engage w ryan here d/t the car accident + connection with laura being ryans SIL. its a unique set up

-i am fascinated by the concept of priests + holy water being so effective here combined with mcginnis' beliefs and basically nondenominational ghosts/seances etc after that. the show is very clearly big on diversity but definitely steers clear from too much WASP stuff yk? wonder if other stuff from christianity works against the ghosts/demons like taking refuge in a church "holy ground" or using silver etc

-"did this start after the night of sept 10?" *this is where you get the time line for the seance if you didnt know

-this is so fucking funny when u realize that patient sal talks to is actually a ghost so sal really is psycho i guess 😂

-bitchsplain/tall jar of mayonnaise 🙏🏻😌 2gether 4ever

-how did ace get this van? also heart attack when he yells at carson (but then grins at him like a goofball lmaooo)

-"for nancys sake and yours" damn she owes ace big time for all this shit

-"what do we do for 7 minutes?" ...ummm play 7 minutes in heaven lmaooo 👀🥵

-was not expecting ace to look this sexy holding an axe but okay (*ah, its his short sleeve shirt showing his arms. usually hes a sleeves guy)

-"desperate for attention" nancy (from gomber) vs "bc she's starved for attention" patrice --> lucy (and candace also...) we know nancys detective work makes her seem like an attention seeker, but what was lucy doing to make them all think that? she was trying to hide her relationship with ryan, not expose it. unless they just mean the rumors about her?

-so is patrice hiding lucy's "truth" talking about lucy being a whore or lucy being a ghost? what is lucy's secret? did patrice guess she was pregnant or did patrice's somehow garbled mind remember tiffany trying to show patrice the video with lucy on it?

-wonder what captain thom thinks of this stand off w ace lmaooo

-"like you do?" top v top shenanigans

-how awko for carson to talk to karen again like this

-"oh no" ACE 😂

-love how amaya says "be a human" like shes kind of admitting people in rich circles typically arent (^this is an interesting focus in s2 when bess's rich family rejects her, thus making her human again, but nancy embraces her rich fam and experiences subsequent moral struggle which is predicted with the wraith)

-wonder what ryan thinks he could get from the marvins (which he cant get now lmaooo)

-this damn whisper box. so many questions. who named it the whisper box? why are the ropers' old possessions still there? who decided to build a mental hospital on top of it? and patrice! she "hid lucy's secrets" hannah gruen thinks tiffany tried to show patrice video w lucy on it, which patrice then specifically says she hid in the thin mans book. so patrice knows of the thin man? can she see him? does she know he was a ghost/supernatural? she must have a supernatural sense to know about him (unless sal told or some shit) so then when tiffany shows up w/ lucy being supernatural in it patrice hides it to protect her? is this why she is "crazy" kinda like victoria? supernatural elements or ability to sense ghosts makes her unstable? this is why lucy being a ghost/nursery rhyme that she repeats makes patrice worse/"stroke"? how did patrice even get into the whisper box to put the key in the bible and get out without getting trapped? also, her dementia --> lucidity is really fucking off, some people mildly switch like that but usually with dementia they cant even register new shit anymore

-...so did bess take the ride? 👀

-interesting how celia says "your father will be disappointed" but nothing of her own opinion. wonder how much celia truly puts up with to keep everett calm and nonhomicidal

-like george asking nick follow up questions that nancy never really would have asked

🥞🥞🥞(ep13)🥞🥞🥞

-is this bitch just eating a plain pancake with her bare hand?

-"extra case load and excessive volunteering" ugh. nancy's family here are like, gross in how "good" of people they are // unrealistic, trying to paint carson in the best light/ no way ryan could ever compare (but the reality is theyre not that good of people for lying about nancy) **and shes arrogant to think shes better than everyone else ie the only one who truly lives virtuously, thinks she can do no wrong sometimes even tho using sex to cope, breaking and entering, etc is not morally "good" stuff she still thinks she is the only one who doesnt lie and plays fair (like in the pilot she lists everyone else as a suspect but herself- obviously we know she isnt guilty but no one else does. (i mean in theory we really dont, what if nancy was an unreliable narrator and was actually guilty, that would be a hella cool show)its reactions like that where she cant understand why others like the chief suspect her

-ooooh ironic that in the Good Place carson readily agrees to pay her for helping with cases as opposed to s2 in reality

-nick's house has "problems" so why does he need a lawyer? as opposed to an interior designer, plumber, or realtor?

-in the Good Place nick and george realize they are not going to work out after one date. does this failure in the Good Place predict failure in reality, or merely an easier way of figuring out the truth? does this mean that the "opposite" of the Good Place is reality, or only an opinion of what is better? (nancy says "you all like me" as her opinion of them liking her is skewed; does this then only reflect nancys version for what is the "perfect life"?)

-why is bess a hippie??? and love how george curls her hair and wears pink lipstick here

-if this dream is so realistic then why is the one thing it cant conjure smoke? like how random

-love the locket being a key realization bc with things like jewelry you dont notice the weight of them until theyre gone

-"you all like me" in her perfect life nancy means they "like" her objectively/regardless of circumstance even though liking her is still an objective choice (like they "like" her because of other reasons instead of her working at the claw? (like how you make friends with coworkers/people at school every day but after you leave the job/graduate you never speak to them again) and her "thanks for showing up!" as if theyre not doing exactly that in reality 😐like where is she getting this shit? she sort of acknowledges in earlier eps she is hard to like/that she puts mysteries before friends, but also pushing them away to avoid danger like the previous ep "why do u show up" etc

-is it just me or does the inside of nicks "house" look like the drews'?

-nick has a dick scar lmaooooo (or more likely was hit in the balls or smth)

-love how nick + george match their anger in confronting sal 100% on the same level

-so when did ace go back to work after having such a busy day earlier?? lmaooo

-damn father shane is a creep (casting defo hired him for his voice) and how tf did he just poof + escape? and what did he request???

-love bess's white hair bow here 😌+ her jacket, whole outfit on point as usual

-like how bess is right that nancy has to find her way out but thats kind of a nonstarter for a room full of panicked people wanting to help

-in the Good Place theres no bad blood between drews + hudsons bc nancy is really theirs

-"the only one who has the key is you" in the Good Place nancy has the key (smaller picture, to finding out what happened to lucy but bigger picture, post-reveal) but ryan has the clues nancy needs- following the Good Place's mirroring, this just means that in reality ryan will either be completely useless or an active hindrance (but you KNOW this is a dream bc in what universe would ryan remember clues like that 😂)

-so in a perfect universe ryan acknowledges his family's "criminal empire" as opposed to reality where he only makes under cover jabs about disengaging with being an "entitled corrupt legacy criminal" ie finding the bonny scot relics but does nothing about them, etc

-"strippers" 😂

-okay what is nancys obsession w her beanie?? bc her mom made it? "wear beanies do crimes?" idk

-making the call: nancy -unable to make up for lost time/both her mothers had to find out/suffer alone / in the Good Place nancy was able to be with kate while she called, and in reality she had carson; somethig about seeing the mother looking to the daughter for strength in the Good Place instead of the reverse (which is what reality sounded like, kate being strong for nancy through the illness despite the struggle)

-concept: nancy & nick "let's wait out the storm"

-"i believe that you believe it" nick in the Good Place + owen in reality both trust nancy when she says she's seen things (owen's is the teeth) but nick in reality (and not really knowing details) doesnt think much of their "moment" bc it wasnt real (so she had to leave the Good Place to save carson- but if she had known then he wasnt her real dad, would she have stayed to be w nick?)

-stranger - suede james 💙👌🏻

-"really anxious as a kid" v telling bc of her desire to know everything to remain in control of situations like she always does now

-"the medicine or the metaphysics?"/"you cannot beat supernatural with science"

-i love nancy playing with her pinky while saying goodbye 🥺

-"always seek out the truth even if it hurts" this is straight irony bc kate never told nancy anything. like does that include the truth about nancys parentage? they taught her to seek out the truth, but who taught her that the truth is the only thing to live by? ie things dont count anymore like carson and kate straight up raising her is tossed out bc she finds out its not "the truth" like all that work/stress to protect carson + she just drops him? with kate maybe shes just upset thst she spent all that time mourning for someone who lied. and would she do the same to ryan if needed? probably

-bess and ace head tilt 💙

-like how for all the time she spent there nancy only has a subconscious memory of blue curtains

-YESSSSS i LOVEthese beautiful overhead shots of hannah's hands. so out of character for the show lmao but so gorgeous

-i feel like future eps/grand future will be nancy going through the lock boxes to help people who asked hannah for help

-the video is officially dated Aug 22, 2019

-soooooo in the first ep nancy breaks into the hudsons house and finds tiffanys secret drawer w the nail polish and finds the amulet with a note that says "for your protection HG" yet on this video tiffany says she talked to a medium who gave her the amulet sooooo am i just confused? HG is hannah gruen obvi so is the address for the medium what hannah gave her? or was the address on the amulet which nancy dissolved in salt water to see? so how would tiffany know where to go? its chicken and the egg which came first hannah or the medium?

and lastly:

i close these two eps with a thought that everything in this show is sealed in death. all the lies, the imagery, the fake constructs people put up to get by all crumple the second someone dies- all the secrets come clean just like these doors have been unsealed.

[vandoornestoffel]

Hey has anyone asked you yet about the time you got to meet the Mclaren team? If not, I'd love to know about it more!!

oH WOW.

I wasn’t expecting this.

Well, I’m watching a 24hrs race with 11 hours to go, I might as well take the time to write this down. Sit down and get ready to read a lot of text. Seriously it’s a lot of text. I’m sorry but this story took part in about 4 or 5 hours so a lot happened. 

So the story has a little bit of background. I’m kinda vocal in Twitter. Not as much as the Papaya McLaren+ members, but somewhat vocal, specially around McLaren. The every weekend wishing the best for my babies, and such. Also, in 2017, I got to meet Stoffel and Fernando at the pitlane walk thing in the Mexican GP. Even appeared in Fernando’s Instagram Stories AND on the worldwide feed because I was the only Mexican with a Belgian flag cheering for Stoffel. So after that I told the team I was going to be back the following year and I did. For extra context, I had literally 48 hours earlier, broken up with my boyfriend at the time (fuck that guy), so I was really really sad. 

So the morning of Thursday before the 2018 Mexican GP, I jump into a plane and take the trip to Mexico City for the GP. I didn’t had a pitlane walk ticket but I was planning on going to the race track and buy one (illegally) outside. So I land, or well, the plane lands, and when I turn my phone on again I find a really surprising message. From McLaren’s official Twitter, I got a DM asking me if I had plans on going to the racetrack that day. For context, I had told the team I was excited to see them on action that weekend. So I said that I still hadn’t a pitlane ticket but that I was looking to buy one. I went to my hotel and then to have breakfast and while I was having a meal, I get a second text asking me if I could meet them up in a door of the racetrack, that they had a gift for me and give me a WhatsApp number to stay in touch. WhatsApp number is British, I don’t know how to save it up because my phone kept putting the Mexican first few numbers as I tried to send message to them, it was an stressful mess but when it finally worked, I was already outside of the racetrack. I met a guy, Danny, and when we meet he gives me a paddock pass. I’m freaking out. On the walk past security and all of that, we are chatting. He’s such a nice guy. I still have his phone number but I don’t dare to text him again. He explains I do have to give the pass back at the end of the day and teaches me to use it and then says Go and see the full paddock, let’s meet up here in 20 minutes. So I have plenty of videos seeing everything. Saw Mauricio Arrivabene, KMag, Romain, Charles, Russell, Gio, and a lot of drivers up close, but they were busy with interviews and I didn’t wanted to disturb them. 20 minutes are up and I meet up with Danny and two other men who I can’t remember their names. That’s when we are talked into the McLaren pit. They explained a lot to us, and the cars were being worked on so we could see the engines up close and many other amazing little details. We walk out again and that’s when we are told. They are also giving us a Pirelli Hot Lap. I cried. No joke. We were walked over the Pirelli Hot Laps place and got to see the cars up close, tried a helmet, met my driver (Josh Cook) and I was eating my brain off. Eventually it’s time to go. We walk the main straight to where the cars were waiting for us, and met Charlotte and Helen (PR girls of McLaren at the time), I got the second to last lap in a McLaren 570s, so as the cars came and went I got more and more anxious. They did delivered me a copy of the video that was filmed but I don’t appear in the Mexican clip they published in their YouTube Channel. And I never published it myself. But if you have seen the “Oh, you drivin’ drivin’” it’s pretty much the same. Going side to side. At times yelling but mostly silence of “holy shit this is happening”. When I got off the car I was shaking. Huge smile in my face. Asked for a pic with Charlotte and Helen, and now I wish I had asked pictures with Danny and Josh as they were super special for me that day. 

So this is where things get weird. Have you ever dreamt of something so much that you have a headcanon on how it’s going to be if something happens?? Well, I had a headcanon that I met Stoffel Vandoorne and in my headcanon I turned around to face his adorable smile. First time, that didn’t happen. This time around, we got invited to McLaren’s hospitality, got a free coke, Fernando was there but he didn’t wanted to even wave. He was in a chat with Buemi in the corner of the hospitality and Charlotte and Helen didn’t even made eye contact with him, it was clear to me that he has like “do not disturb” moments. So I was driving my coke and I hear one of the guys say “Oh the girl is going to freak out so much” and well, I was the girl, and I was wearing my 2018 team shirt with Stoffel’s name. So I was chilling and suddenly I hear a “Hi!” and I know that voice. I’ve heard that voice a million times in interviews. I leave my coke in the table and stand up to turn around and see him. Stoffel Vandoorne. I turn around again and sit down because this is not happening. This is a dream. I probably passed out and I’m dreaming. Charlotte asks “Are you ok?” and I know she’s talking about me. I turn again to face Stoffel and tears are in my eyes. It’s really him. And he has that stupid smile in his face. I can barely say “Hi” and my voice cracks but I’m trying my best to not cry. I raise my arm to shake his hand as Stoffel says “Don’t you want a hug?”, I crack again and just approach to hug him. IT IS THE BEST HUG IN MY LIFE. I can’t tell you what he’s smelled like because my definition is just clean. I didn’t smelled a cologne or sweat, I just smelt clean clothes and a clean man. We got a few pictures taken. On the first Lando is in the background, all funny, and we invite them to our picture. He stood on the side of the group and one of the other guys says “Why don’t you stand in the side of the girl, so she can have a McSandwich”. Best McSandwich ever. Stoffel had to leave (to track walk, I believe) and Lando stayed chatting with us for a while. When he finally left, we were invited for one last walk around the paddock. Even got into the stadium area of the circuit. And then it was time to leave. On the walk back to the main door where it all started I asked Danny why me? Why had they invited me? He said that he had noticed my tweets beforehand but the fact that I had tweeted to Lando saying I was excited to see him in FP1, and he retweeted me, was the reason why I got the invite. So, my dream way of meeting Stoffel Vandoorne became a reality thanks to Lando Norris and his really cute way of being with his fans. 

As soon as I gave the pass away, I started to run. I was on the opposite side of the circuit than the pitlane walk door. So I ran, bought a ticket, ran some more, and pushed myself to the front of the crowd to meet Stoffel again. Yeah, I’m that crazy. So Charlotte sees me and says “Hey, look who it is Stoffel!” and Stoffel sees me and he’s like HI AGAIN! so HE FUCKING RECOGNIZED ME. So I chat with Charlotte a bit and say that I forgot to ask for an autograph so as Stoffel is signing one, and hands it to me, she says, “give her more”, so Stoff signed 2 more and handed them over. I told him I was going to miss him in F1 but that he had my support wherever he went, and he said thanks and carried on with his duty before leaving. I stayed there, as people left when they realised there were no drivers to sign cards, until I was told I had to leave. Prior to this, I met Lee Mathurin (a McLaren mechanic who I just discovered he has deleted his Twitter account, and I’m scared) and asked for a picture with him and other mechanics (he chicked out in coming to meet me along so he asked some friends to tag along) and as I try to snap the picture he grabs my phone and walks to the pits. He snapped a few good pictures of Stoffel’s car and the people around and came back to me to take a selfie of us. So after that, I got asked to leave by security and I rode an Uber back to my hotel room. As soon as I walked in and my mom asked “How it went?” I started crying my eyes out. That was waaay beyond what I had ever dreamt about. I was coming there still crying about my ex (I literally cried about him on the plane) and I started crying about how lucky and happy I was 12 hours later. McLaren, unknowing to them, made my life experience something I could never afford, in a moment when I most needed it. I couldn’t attend to the 2019 race and I’m not going to the 2020 race either, but I couldn’t ask for a better and happier day in my life. I truly owe that day forever to that team.

[gvf-imagine]

Part 2

A/N: as always feedback is welcome! I hope you all enjoy it ❣️also if you would like to be added to the tag list just message me

Tag list: @karrotkate @satingrass-maidensfair @justacollegestudentyay @love-philautia @jimmypagesandbrianmayshair

Word count: 3206

———————————————————————

It had been a week since the festival show with Greta Van Fleet, you found yourself listening to their songs on a daily basis and every once in a while you smile absentmindedly as thoughts of them ran through your head. That night with the boys ended with passion and insight. After having that moment with them in that field of lush grass they went back to their bus and you went back to yours feeling like a whole new chapter of your life had begun and you knew for a fact that would not be the last time you'd see them. You truly liked all of them, Josh made you laugh, Danny made you feel safe, Jake made you feel reckless and free, and Sammy brought you a certain aspect of self-involved peace. They all had great qualities about them that made them special to you in the short time that you were with them. They left an impression and you couldn't help but wonder if you'd left one on them.

Unfortunately the alcohol that swirled in your veins caused you to stumble into a sleepy stupor and by the time you woke up , hazzy, with a migraine, your tour bus was already long gone from Los Angeles and headed back home. You cursed yourself for not getting at least one of their numbers before going your separate ways. In the week since, you had been spending your time with yourself mostly. Lounging around your apartment, catching up on sleep and some of your favorite netflix series. Now it was friday morning and you had just woken up, not by choice but rather from the sound of some ungodly loud construction worker who was jack hammering the pavement like it owed him money. The sun was up, the birds were chirping, it was another typical day in your small town. Immediately upon waking your body craved caffeine, you hadn't drank at all last night so the headache slamming in your brain was surely due to the lack of said caffeine in your bloodstream. Nothing a quick cup of coffee couldn’t fix. In your ever flattering attire of jogging pants and a tank top, you moved down the hall to your kitchen, the sun shining through your windows and warming your skin like a gentle hello. 

As the coffee brews you look at your phone, no messages or calls, which is not unusual as you don't have many friends or family still in the area. You open your instagram page with a flick of your thumb and you can't stop the smile that paints its way across your face when you see you had four new followers, Josh , Sam, Jake, and Danny had all found their way to your account, you followed them all back instantly and spent the next half an hour sipping your coffee and going through their photos. Four such gorgeous men literally at your fingertips, you were smiling so much your cheeks began to hurt. When you took a sip of your coffee and were met with a cold liquid you decided that was enough phone time for now, now it was time for a nice hot shower. 

Throughout your shower you absolutely could NOT take your mind off the boys. Josh’s smile filled your mind as water cascaded down your body, relaxing your muscles and awakening your mind. What a beautiful man he is, so gentle and enticing, you licked your lips thinking about him.

The skin on your fingertips began to prune, it was time to get out. You wrapped a warm towel around your body and walked back into your room to get dressed for the day. You settled on a simple outfit, a high waisted jean skirt, with a yellow collared shirt and black knee high stockings. You were doing your makeup when you heard your phone chime in the bathroom, you smack your lips in the mirror, evenly spreading the matte,nude color across your moist lips. You shoot yourself a smile and go to get your phone. 

Josh_gvf: “hey girl, miss me?” 

You laugh , elated that one of them got in contact with you. That must have meant that he was thinking about you, it was good to know you weren't the only one that recognized the connection you felt.

Y: “hey Josh, how'd you know?” You write back perhaps a bit too quickly. You were not ashamed to seem eager, you were eager.

Josh_gvf: “I got a feeling ;) so guess what?” His response comes even quicker than yours. 

Y:”what??” originally you had put three question marks but erased one as it seemed too overzealous. 

Josh_gvf: “were playing in detroit tonight, nothing huge, just a bar show but we'd love it if you would come…..to the show  mean”  You could almost hear his flirtatious tone in your head, he would have shot you a wink as well. God a show sounded wonderful, honestly fuck the show, seeing the boys sounded wonderful. 

Josh_gvf: “of course we would come pick you up, your town is on the way anyways” he sends another message. 

Y: “of course! I’d love to come, what time?” you reply, your heartbeat was quickening in your chest and butterfly wings tickled the sides of your stomach. You were so excited! 

Josh_gvf: “we’ll pick you up around 6 ok? Wear something cute, I need eye candy while im up on stage” more flirtation, god you loved it, you craved it you craved him. His words settled over you, like the warm welcome of an old friend, or that feeling you get when you hear a song you haven't heard in years.

Y: “sounds good and I’ll try my hardest not to disappoint ;)” you write back, you also send him your address. 

Six o’clock was not very far away, only a few hours now. You wondered if you should change your outfit and you decide to find something a bit more tantalizing. 

You dig through your dressers and rummage around in your closet until you've got the perfect outfit put together:  



You looked over yourself in the mirror, happy with your creation, your outfit on, your hair was done and so was your makeup, just a few squirts of perfume and you’d be ready to go.

You were so excited to see them it almost confused you. Why do you like them so much , honestly, you didn’t know them that well even. You couldn’t help it , being around them felt right in every way.

———————————————————

You heard two horn beeps come from outside your apartment. You scramble to the window and see a stretch limo below you, a smiling Danny Wagner hanging out of the sun roof. You practically squeal , grab your phone and run down stairs. When you open the door the boys pile out of the limo to greet you.

“Oh baby” josh winces upon seeing your outfit. His face looked as if though you looked so good it hurt him.

“Enough eye candy?” You question gesturing to yourself.

“You look gorgeous” Sam says grabbing your hand and leading you into a limo.

“Wow you guys get limo rides to your shows? Man My manager just gives me 5 bucks for gas” you joke. Jake laughs loudly as he climbs in the seat next to you.

“It’s good to see you again (y/n)” Jake chimes with a glistening smile, as he rakes his fingers over his head and through his hair. As he moved you caught a whiff of his cologne , it was sweet and very subtle not at all the scent you thought he’d go with.

As the limo begins to move your eyes move to josh who was already looking at you with a hind of mischief on his face. You wondered what he was thinking about.

“You want a drink love?” He asked. Hearing him call you love made your knees weak. His voice was so enticing , like melted chocolate. You wondered if he tasted like melted chocolate too. That satire thought escapes your mind through your mouth as you say “yeah I’d love a drink” you answer, clearing dirty thoughts from your head.

“Southern and seven right?” He asks holding up a bottle of southern comfort.

“Yeah!” You chime , happy he remembered your drink.

“Good because I bought this just for you, girl” josh informs. Your cheeks are blushing and you know it, you can feel the tingling burn on your face.

“Aw you made her blush” Sam comments running his index finger gently down your cheek. Josh looks over to you as he pours your drink. His eyes scan your face , lingering a bit on your lips. He looked at you with hunger as if you were sitting there naked and waiting for his touch. That image sent chills down your spine, he winks at you as he hands you your drink. Suddenly your throat feels dry so you chug the drink with an exasperated sigh when you finish.

“Jesus” Danny says with a chuckle.

“Get her another one” Sam speaks taking your empty glass from you and handing it back to josh. You heard a lighter spark to your right , Jake was lighting a blunt.

Oh that’s why he was being so quiet.

His lips rest around the end and he inhales watching the cherry burn as the smoke slips into his mouth, brushing over her succulent rose lips. He looks at you and smiles as he holds the smoke in then passes you the blunt as he releases.

You take two hits making “O’s” with the smoke as you exhale with a giggle.

“I can do that too” Danny says excitedly, you pass him the blunt and he gives it a try.

“Hmmm no. You can’t” josh states , all of you laugh at Danny’s sad attempt.

“You’ll get it one day” Sam chimes with a smile.

The limo was full of smoke now, you looked around at the boys through the hazy fog. Everyone is quiet now , you sipping your drink and watching the world pass by put the window. The alcohol and the weed were begging to take affect. The alcohol warmed your body while the weed pulled your mind into alleviation... a lusty combination. You were so calm in this moment , you knew this was exactly where you belonged, it just felt right and you hadn’t had the privilege to get that sense of fleeing very many times in your life.

———————————————————

Jakes hand reaches for you, offering his help as you step out of the limo, you accept and thank him. The sun still hung in the sky, blinding the earth unapologetically. The sunshine felt good casted over your skin, with your head still swimming in an elegant haze.

Josh grabs your waist and pulls you closer to him , his hand stays at your hips as you all walk through the door.

“I’m glad you’re hear, love” he coos in your ear before gently kissing your ear lobe. Your knees buckle causing you to wobble slightly, Josh tightens his grip on you and smiles

“Oh she likes it she likes it” he purrs with a wink.

Yeah. you loved it. You wanted more of him, you couldn’t stand the sexual tension anymore, you wanted to feel him and taste him , to know him in that way.

The bar was packed with people , you were sort of surprised. Josh said this wasn’t going to be a big show but it looked pretty big to you, there were people everywhere. Danny hops on the stage and begins tending to his drum set ,making small changes in its position.

“We gotta go on wish us luck” Sam chimes giving you a side hug.

“You don’t need luck Sammy, you guys are the best” you reply before he and Jake join Danny on stage. Josh plays with a piece of your hair , twirling it around his finger looking at you.

“I’m singing for you tonight girly” he whispers , his voice slick with liquor.

His hand trails down your cheek gently as he just looks at you. Seconds later he winks and joins his brothers on stage taking the microphone in his hand. Already the audience was forming and cheering for the boys. You found yourself right in front of the stage, a mass of people on either side of you and the smell of alcohol and smoke hung in the air.

Josh introduced the guys before Jake started to play the opening for ‘when the curtain falls’. A chorus of cheers and motion erupting from the crowd. Josh’s voice was all you could hear, the freeing sound of his bluesy rasp send vibrations through the building. His voice flooded from his mouth and filled the air like bright red fireworks exploding in the sky. He was so talented. The sound of Jakes guitar slices through you like a lightening bolt of sound and energy. Danny’s drums pounded into the crowd, his strong, muscular arms in control of it all. The sound of sam’s bass flooded over you like huge purple waves of calming spirit. He played that bass like it was all he knew how to do, like it was part of him. Song after song the boys held this vitality and vigor and the crowd was eating it up. Josh walked off to the side of the stage for a second before returning with something behind his back. Arms were reaching for him as he walked to the edge of the stage , his eyes meet yours and he brings a rose out from behind him and reaches to hand it to you



You can hear the jealous gasps of girls around you. You smile up at him before he brings the microphone to his lips once more and continues singing. You smell the rose and feel those familiar butterflies in your stomach again. You were in awe, these boys had such raw talent and capability. You know a band is good when they make a bar show feel like a sold out arena. enjoying the music you moved with the crowd , the songs taking control of your body and mind , you forget there’s people around you, you are thrown into a world of your own. You don’t open your eyes again until josh announces that the show was over and offers his thanks and goodbyes to the crowd.

Josh jumps off the stage in immediately walks to you.

“Come here” he utters his hands grab your face before he presses his lips to yours. You are caught off guard but you let him do it, you wanted this just as much as he did. You didn’t know what had gotten into him , perhaps the adrenaline from a wonderful show.

His tongue licks your bottom lip asking for permission before you open your mouth and let his tongue slip in, deepening the kiss and the passion. His hand was now behind your head and wrapped around your waist pulling you further into him. A small moan escapes your lips unintentionally but you couldn’t help it. He balls your hair in his fist as he continues to kiss you.

When he lets you go your face is flushed and his chest is rising and falling with desire. The rest of the night was spent drowning in liquor.

Eventually bar time came around and it was time to get back in the limo. You all stumbled in, you got in first then josh sat on your left and Danny on your right Jake and Sam sat in the seats across from you.

When the limo pulled up to your apartment you sighed sad to leave.

Danny put his arm around you and gave you a hug wishing you a good nights sleep. Sam and Jake did the same , Josh got out and walked to your door to help you out.

He smiles as he walks you to your porch.

“Let me see your phone” he says reaching for it in your pocket. You pull it out and hand it to him happily. He presses a few buttons before handing it back to you.

“There now you have my number “ he says flashing you a smirk.

“Awesome, I’ll text you in a little while to make sure you guys got home ok, give my number to the other guys too ok?” You chime as his hand grabs yours.

“I will” he promises before kissing you on the cheek.

“Thank you for coming tonight” he adds, his voice was softer now.

“Of course it was super fun and you guys did great” you reply. Josh looks back at the limo.

“We should hangout sometime just me and you yeah? We can go to dinner this Saturday if you want, would you like that?” He offers.

“Yeah that sounds great Josh!” You beam. Josh lifts your hand to his lips kissing it gently, looking you in the eye.

“Goodnight (y/n)” he coos

“Goodnight josh” you smile. He winks as he gets back in the limo , you wave until the car is out of sight.

———————————————————

In the week that passed you had gotten in touch with all of the boys , josh did as you asked and gave them all your number, you talked to at least one of them every day.

Tonight was your big date with josh and you were so excited. You found the perfect outfit and couldn’t wait for him to see you in it.

Just then your phone vibrates, you pick it up and look at the message.

Josh: hey girlie , I hate this but I have to cancel our date tonight ... something came up I’m so sorry , I really wanted to see you but I can’t get out of this, I’ll make it up to you though I promise

Your heart sinks as you read the message, you felt upset for josh and hoped everything was ok but at the same time you were really sad that you couldn’t go out with him now.

Y: oh no I hope everything is ok Josh, no worries we will hangout some other time ❣️

You set your phone down and walk to your room to change out of your new outfit. You grab jogging pants and an old ‘quiet riot’ t shirt and head to your living room to spend an uneventful night on the couch.

Hours later you’re scrolling through Instagram. When a post josh is tagged catches your eye. You look at the date and see it was posted one hour ago. It was a picture of him and some girl at a mini golf course. You deflate when you read the caption.

“Fun night with Joshy❣️”

“Something came up huh josh...” you say to yourself with disappointment.

You look at the girls name ‘Andrea hartnet ’.

You flip to your messaging and click on Danny’s name.

Y: hey Danny, does josh know anyone named Andrea?

A few seconds pass before he responded

D: yeah that’s his ex, why?

—————————————————-

To be continued

[tomboyneedshercoffee]

Lovedust pt.7 || Peter Parker x Stark Reader

Summary: It’s the night of the party and Y/N is having seconds thoughts about going but her friend Kim convinces her to go and have fun. While things get more complicated with Peter, Y/N and Josh get closer at the party. 

Word Count: MF 7.7K ( This is my longest piece I-)

Author’s note: YALL HERE WE ARE! THE BIG OOPSIE DOOPSIE OF LOVEDUST! This is probably my favorite part that I have written so far- it’s fairly long but boy did my heart HURT. I would say we have about maybe 2-3 chapters left give or take and I’m so bummed the story is almost over :(. Thank you all for being incredibly kind, your support means so much I can’t thank you guys enough. ALSO hehe there’s a lil easter egg from the first chapter and the chapter with Y/N having a nightmare. If yall pay attention to some of the wording at the end...

Warnings: Underage drinking, adult language, angst, mentions of death

part one || part two || part three || part four || part five || part six || part seven || part eight || epilogue

You wanted it to be a normal night, one that in hindsight, would’ve worked out in your favor if you were normal to begin with. You weren’t the partying type or maybe, you just convinced yourself that it wasn’t the case since you were hardly invited to them to begin with. 

As if it made any sense, you felt eerily similar to Cinderella at this moment; even though she was one of the worst princesses in your opinion, you still sympathized with her story. The idea of wanting nothing more than to leave the confines of her dusty attic to dress pretty for a ball was something you could sadly relate to. 

While the Avengers complex was by far well above the average means, it was Cinderella longing for just one night away from her complicated life that made you see the story in a different light. 

But after years of wondering what it would be like to go to a real party (now that you were offered the chance to go) it wasn’t the way you dreamed it would be. As you stood in front of your closet, recalling the times you had put on outfits that you thought would be the perfect party attire just seemed like pieces of cloth, nothing more and nothing less. 

Because you didn’t care about the stupid party. You cared about Peter. 

You had put so much blame on him for everything; his feelings that he couldn’t control and his past which he apologized for multiple times. When you had the chance to fix everything, you were too scared to be vulnerable with him and admit that maybe you were falling for him. 

You weren’t a coward, you wanted to convince yourself that you could still move on and have fun without thinking of him but you felt almost embarrassed that you were feeling the opposite. 

“ I don’t want to go anymore. This isn’t right,” You sighed as you turned to your phone that was propped up against your dresser,” I can’t just leave him here while I go off to some party.”

You watched Kim through the facetime call as she put down her mascara to take a second to look at you,” Y/N, you have been talking about this party all week. Hell, I gave you that blue top that makes your boobs look great and you even said you couldn’t wait to wear it to the party!”

You only hummed in response as you moved aside the hangers in your closet to find the top that Kim had let you borrow. 

“ We mentally prepared for this, we watched Superbad and Booksmart in one night to get the full spectrum of high school parties and we even practiced how to play beer pong!”

“ That was on our phones, I’m sure it’s different in real life,” You sighed as you took off your shirt and slipped on Kim’s blue blouse,” I just feel awful about going to a party knowing Peter is just gonna be here all night.” 

“ Y/N, you deserve this party. You’ve worked your ass off for four years and I know how badly you wanted to go ever since we got uninvited to that one theatre party where Timothy Chalamete supposedly showed up to. I know you feel guilty about Peter and yeah, you kinda fucked things up, for now, but you deserve a goddamn break,” Kim practically yelled through the screen, doing her best to hype you up,” if you don’t go, you’re gonna regret it, you and I both know that. So just get dressed, do your hair all cute and shit, put on makeup or whatever you do and go have fun at this party with Josh.”

“ Fuck, Josh! I completely forgot about him, he’s supposed to pick me up in an hour!” You said as you suddenly felt a wave of nerves come over you,” what do I do about Josh? What if he tries to make a move on me tonight?”

“ Do you want him to make a move?”

“ I don’t know...not really but then again, I wouldn’t mind. Don’t hate me cause I know this sounds shitty, but maybe I need a distraction from Peter...is that awful?” You asked as you slipped off your pajama pants and rummaged through your dresser for jeans,” don’t answer that, I know that’s awful to say. Am I turning into a fuckboy?”

“ If you feel empathy than no, you’re not turning into a fuckboy,” Kim laughed as you found a pair of jeans to slip into,” look, I know how you feel about Peter and if you see yourself wanting to be with him than this thing you have with Josh won’t happen. At the same time, even if you do like Peter and you want to have fun with Josh for a night, you’re not a shitty person for wanting that. You’ve been through the wringer with Peter and to be honest, Josh is literally a goddamn angel so I don’t blame you for seeing him as an option. Either way, you’re hot, smart as fuck, and you are a fucking Stark; you don’t owe Peter or Josh anything so do what you want to do because you deserve it.” 

Kim was every protagonist’s wet dream; the side character who had more to offer every time and yet, she practically thrived off of hyping you up. You knew that she had a point, she always did. 

A part of you could tell which way she was leaning in terms of who you would go out with and yet, she only cared that you were making the right choice for yourself and your own happiness. 

“ You really are a ride or die friend,” You said honestly as Kim smiled back,” I’m going to get ready but I’ll see you there okay?” 

“ Will do girlfriend!”

Once the facetime call ended, you leaned back in your chair and stared at yourself in the mirror. 

You didn’t know what your intentions would be for the night and even though Kim had said you wouldn’t be a bad person if you had fun with Josh, you knew you would still feel shitty doing so, especially when you knew that you had strong feelings for Peter. 

As you fixed up your hair, all you could do was replay the conversation with Peter in the rain and how close you were to confessing everything. Looking back, you knew you were stupid for running away, if you really liked him than what was the problem of letting him know how you felt?

Because you knew once he was cured, he wouldn’t share the same feelings for you. 

In every sense of the lovedust, the way Peter felt about you wasn’t natural and yet, it was the lovedust that really made you like Peter back. 

You were just saving yourself from future heartbreak and given your past relationships, you had a reason to be hesitant in being that vulnerable with another guy. 

And yet, you still feel like you owed Peter an explanation. 

You got up from your seat and walked out of your bedroom, making a beeline towards his room. You were sure he was done with testing at this point but after knocking on his door a few times, there still wasn’t a response. 

You opened the bedroom door to find his room completely empty with everything neatly tucked in place as if he was cleaning up for a guest. 

The complex was big but you knew you would run into sometime before Josh showed up so you walked straight out and went to the elevators to make your way up to the labs. As you pressed the elevator button, you felt some unease sitting at the pit of your stomach. 

Something felt off, whether it be your natural woman inclination or just the fact that you were nervous to confront Peter. 

The elevator doors slid open and you walked in before you pressed the button to the designated floor like it was second nature.

Just breath, you’re fine, why are you freaking out?

You felt your phone buzz in your pocket and once you pulled it out, you felt your heart skip a beat when you saw Josh’s contact name pop up. 

Josh: I just left my apartment! I’ll see you in 20 min!

Your stomach shifted once again as you replied back before stuffing your phone back into your front pocket. 

Twenty minutes. 

That was enough time to confess to Peter right? 

The elevator doors opened to the lab and you walked towards the main zone with a slow pace, as if the anticipation would suddenly make you feel less nervous. 

Once you rounded the corner to where your dad and Banner were usually working on Peter, you found the room to be completely empty besides for a few lab technicians who were working rather quickly. 

You took a moment to give one last look into the lab before going down the hallway to peek into the other glass rooms to try and find Peter. You had a feeling that maybe you should’ve checked the gym before coming all the way up to the labs but once you found yourself in front of the last room, you spotted your dad and Banner walking out with grim faces. 

“ Dad? Is everything okay?” You asked as their heads whipped around to turn to you,” have you two seen Peter anywhere?” 

You studied your dad’s face carefully but he gave no inclination of what the situation was, a talent he had grown accustomed to since he was your age. You gave up on your dad and watched Banner’s face, a face you always had a talent of reading easily. 

He kept his eye contact anywhere but towards your direction and the collar around his neck was wet, a sign that he was stressed out.

“ Banner, where’s Peter?” You asked again as you looked up at him before moving your eyes toward the room they had just walked out of,” is he in there?” 

“ He’s-”

“Resting. He’s had a day full of tests so we put him in one of the hospital beds just to keep an eye on him,” Your dad interrupted as you watched Banner gulp,” it’s not a big deal kiddo.”

Liar. 

“ Okay...well if it’s not a big deal than I’m gonna go check up on him to make sure he’s okay,” You said wearily as you tried to walk in between your dad and Banner but he took a step to block you. 

“ Y/N, he’s not feeling well-”

“ Why are you lying?” You asked as you looked back at Banner,” what are you two not telling me?”

Your dad kept up the charade and sighed as if he was annoyed,” Kiddo, he’s K.O’d for the night. You know, lots of tests and meds that’ll have him relaxed for a few hours. Maybe you should check up on him tomorrow.” 

You could tell he was trying so hard to keep up the lie and while your dad was a phenomenal liar, you were smart enough to see right through his act. 

All you could do was nod as you played coy,” Okay, that’s fine. Oh! I wanted to let you know I’m going to that party tonight so I won’t be home until later.”

As you were studying Tony, he was doing the same right back at you. It was like a game of chess; who would break first, who had the upper hand, and who was going to make the next move without disrupting their own game. 

“ Alright, just be safe than. Be back before eleven,” Tony said as he patted your shoulder and started walking with you back to the elevator, his hand almost leading you away from the door,” Remember; Beer before liquor, never been sicker.”

You couldn’t take it anymore, you needed to know what was wrong with Peter. 

You stopped in your tracks as you turned around to face your dad and Banner, who was still avoiding your gaze. You knew something was up, it was painfully obvious and you weren’t going to just turn over and accept defeat. 

“ Would you ever lie to me?” You asked as your dad inhaled sharply, immediately shaking his head without a second thought,” okay.” 

You peeked your eyes back to the door and before you knew it, you ducked under your dad’s arm and ran over to the room where you were sure they were hiding Peter away. 

“ Y/N, stop!” 

You ran even faster as you practically slid against the tiled floor before throwing open the door to find Peter in the hospital bed. A huge heart monitor was connected to the side that had immediately spiked when you entered the room. 

“ Y/N? What are you doing here?” Peter asked as he sat up in his bed as your eyes traveled to several IV’S that were attached to his forearm. 

The first thing you focused on was how pale he looked. Whatever the hospital gown couldn’t cover showed almost a ghostly touch to his usual lush color. Since the lovedust, he had always had a blushful expression, accessorized with flushed cheeks or red tinted ears but now, there was none of that. 

You could hear your dad and Banner behind you but before your dad could drag you back, you could hear Banner talking your dad out of it to ‘give the kids some time.’ 

You didn’t even bother saying thank you as the door shut behind you, leaving you and Peter alone in the room. You were almost scared to come closer to him, he didn’t look like himself at all. 

You looked towards the heart monitor again which caused Peter’s heart rate to spike up with the thought alone. 

“ Tell me what happened,” You finally said as you made your way over to sit on the edge of Peter’s bed,” it’s serious, isn’t it?” 

Peter swallowed nervously but shrugged like it was nothing,” Your dad was there before anything bad happened.”

You shook your head, you weren’t going to get any information out of him like this. You turned to the side of his hospital bed and picked up a clipboard with his medical information. Peter tried grabbing it out of your hands but you stared him down, as if to say ‘ don’t try me.’ 

Peter backed down as your eyes scanned the sheet carefully, trying to decipher all of the medical lingoes that were vaguely familiar from watching Grey’s Anatomy. 

You felt your breath hitch as you read over the same diagnosis. 

“ You had an acute heartattack because of me, didn’t you?” You finally said as you carefully placed the clipboard on the desk beside you,” because of our argument... and you weren’t going to tell me.” 

“ Y/N, there was no reason to worry you-”

“ You’re so stupid Peter, why wouldn’t I be worried for you? You think an acute heartattack is something as normal as a fucking cold?” You snapped as you watched his heart rate rise. You took a deep breath and ran your fingers through your hair to calm yourself down,” I’m killing you. Loving me is literally killing you Peter.”

Peter watched your gaze fall back to the IV’S while he kept his eyes on you the whole time. You looked absolutely defeated and he didn’t blame you. The way you stared at his arm made him feel like you were trying to somehow reverse the lovedust, as if you could take his pain away. 

And yet, what you didn’t know was that Tony had just come in minutes before you to announce that yes, you could actually take the pain away forever. 

“ What about you? Is it killing you?” Peter asked as you tore your eyes away from his IV’s and locked your gaze on him.

“ Seeing you like this? Of course it’s killing me, I’m not that cruel Parker.”

“ No,” Peter swallowed dryly,” is it killing you that you might love me?” 

Your first instinct was to laugh. What kind of sick joke was coming out his mouth? You tried to force any sound, anything that was a resemblance of something from English translation but your brain mentally stuttered. 

It was as if your mind and words went on pause to let your thoughts catch up to you. Were you really that easy to read or did Peter know you better than you know yourself? 

“ How do I answer that?” You asked quietly as Peter was quick with a reply. 

“ You answer it honestly.”

“ Oh, because you have been so honest with me?”

“ You haven’t been telling me the truth either. You’re a lot of things Y/N, but you’re not innocent.” 

“ Oh yeah? What am I then? Since you clearly know so much about me,” You replied to somehow detour the conversation. 

Peter gladly took the bait as he chuckled,” You’re stubborn. You’re the most stubborn girl I have ever met in my entire life and I love that about you. It makes things interesting knowing that you don’t roll over for anyone, even when you know you’re wrong.” 

You only hummed, he had a point. You had learned that from Tony and you weren’t ashamed about it one bit. 

“ Well, I love how foolishly selfless you are. You always put everyone else’s feelings before yours even when your health is at stake,” You said back as Peter’s smile faltered. 

Oh how spot on you were. 

Cause in this moment now, Peter was between a rock and a hard place. He had information that you didn’t have, information that would seemingly fix everything and yet, he didn’t want you to know. 

The cure for the lovedust. 

“ You’re keeping something from me, aren’t you?” You said after studying his expression for a moment as Peter released his bottom lip that he was holding in between his teeth nervously. 

Yes. 

“ I think you’re the one not being honest with your feelings,” Peter said as a matter of fact,” why won’t you admit it?”

You wanted to swallow your pride because damn it, you didn’t want a repeat of earlier. You didn’t want to chicken out but could you afford to be vulnerable again?

“ Peter...I don’t want to admit anything until you’re in the right state of mind,” You finally said, which was the most honest answer you could give,” after all, we both know what you’re feeling for me isn’t the same as how I feel for you...it’s a side effect of the dust.”

Peter only nodded, even though there was so much to say to you. Peter felt like he was in a slowburn novel, but damn, even at this point there had to be more to give right? If this was a story of two people who were meant to be together, then why the hell is it taking so long? 

If Peter could have it his way, he would rewrite it to where they could be happily ever after in the first chapter but sadly, this was real life and there wasn’t that kind of luxury. 

“You’re right, it’s not the same,” Peter said bitterly as his sympathetic smile faded,” just a side effect.” 

You both understood. As things stood now, it was more of a standstill than anything. A pause, a pitstop, anything to halt whatever momentum the two of you shared.  You felt absolutely broken that he admitted it, his “love” for you wouldn’t ever be the same as however, you felt about him in that moment. 

Just like that, you both knew you were doomed from the start.

You felt your phone vibrate in your pocket and you already knew it was Josh. You inhaled deeply as you gave Peter’s hand a squeeze before rising from his bed,” I’m gonna go but if anything happens, call me okay?” 

“ Same goes for you. Be safe,” Peter said in almost a whisper as you nodded before turning to the door. 

You walked out of the room and leaned against the door for a moment collecting your thoughts. You ignored the gaze of Banner and your dad and seemingly walked through the two without batting an eye. 

Tony felt guilty knowing that you had caught him in a lie but he really thought he was doing his daughter a favor. Once he knew you were gone, Tony walked through the door to find Peter deep in thought. 

Tony shut the door behind him and walked over, taking a seat in the chair beside Peter’s bed. No one said anything for a moment but Peter was the one to break the silence first. 

“ I didn’t tell her about the cure. I don’t think she would even want to...” Peter admitted as Tony nodded. 

Tony crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair, his mind wandering in every direction,” Good call. Thor said our time is fleeting so we need to make sure it works.” 

Peter shifted nervously in his spot,” You and Banner won’t stop finding a different cure though, right? Just in case?” 

“ Yeah, just in case.” 

                                                       -------

“ You look nervous,” Josh pointed out once the two of you pulled up into the driveway of Amber’s house,” did you want to wait a second before we walk in?” 

You shook your head as you tried to swallow any nerves that were building up in your throat. You couldn’t believe you were actually about to go to a party after everything that has been going on. 

“ No, I’m fine...It sounds stupid but I don’t really do parties so this is all kinda new,” You admitted as you took in another deep breath. 

“ It’s not stupid at all. If it makes you feel any better, I usually get pretty antsy before preforming but now that I know you’re going to watch me, I feel less nervous,” Josh smiled warmly as you started to feel your senses ease,” parties aren’t as scary as you think. Yeah, there are always a lot of people I don’t know but seeing a familiar face is always reassuring.” 

Josh had a way of calming you down that no other person could do so easily. You wondered if someone else had said the same thing to you like Kim or Peter and if it would have the same effect but maybe it was just exclusively Josh that had that sort of charm. 

“ Okay, I’m ready.”

The funny thing was, you really thought you were ready until you stepped into her house. The floor vibrated along to the beat of whatever song was blasting along the speakers and the smell of alcohol and weed felt almost suffocating. You were immediately overwhelmed with the amount of people already there and of course, you hardly recognized anyone from school. 

“ Here, hold on tight,” Josh intertwined his fingers with yours as he led you both through the crowd of teenagers almost too effortlessly. 

He led you outside and you thanked god the stage that was set up for his band was in the backyard. You walked along the poolside, following closely behind him before you felt someone splash you with water. 

“ Hey what- Kim!” You shouted excitedly as you let go of Josh’s hand to crouch down beside the pool to where Kim was swimming in just her bra and underwear,” you’re not even wearing a swimsuit? You dirty bitch.”

Kim laughed as she rested her hands against the edge of the pool,” Took you two long enough. Joshua, how are you this evening?” 

“ It’s going good Kimberly, I hope you’re enjoying yourself,” Josh teased back as Kim playfully rolled her eyes,” Y/N, I’m gonna check in with the guys real quick. Are you cool to stay here for a second?”

You nodded and shooed Josh with your hand,” Go, I’ll be fine.”

Josh gave you one last nod before jogging over to where his band was setting up. His bandmates had seen you walking over hand in hand with you and were now giving Josh hard pats on his back, as if to say ‘ nice job.’ 

“ He’s so respectful it physically hurts. Like I know the bar is so low for men but Josh checks every box. It’s annoying,” Kim sighed as you dragged a lawn chair from the grass and put it next to the edge of the pool to continue talking to your friend,” I would kill to be in your shoes right now. Oh to have two, brown-eyed guys fawn over me!” 

You couldn’t help but laugh as Kim dramatically placed her hand over her forehead and all you could do was shake your head,” Whatever, you didn’t even like Peter. You said so yourself he was a total douchebag.” 

“ Was a total douchebag and look, not that it’s any competition but I’m hashtag, team Peter. I’m a sucker for a good enemies to lovers trope,” Kim sighed as you felt your chest tighten up at her proclamation. 

You moved your eyes away from Kim as Josh came back over to you,” Did you want me to get you a drink?”

“ Thank goodness yes-”

“Y/N you should go with him,” Kim insisted as you turned to give her an odd look,” don’t get me wrong Joshua, I trust you but ya know, parties and alcohol and...men. Just to be extra safe.” 

You wanted to drown Kim on the spot for even insinuating that Josh would do something as terrible as spiking your drink but luckily, Josh gave a sincere nod. 

“ Of course, that’s not a problem. Men really are the worst,” Josh said casually as the two gave each other a little salute,” ready Y/N?”

Josh interlocked his hand with yours once again as he led you back into the house and through the kitchen as some people called out to greet him. 

“ Look at you Mr. Popular,” You teased as Josh squeezed your hand before opening up the fridge.

“ This is your first time drinking right?” Josh asked as you nodded, almost embarrassed,” Hey, that’s alright. You and I are gonna stick to the light stuff tonight, these taste better anyway.”

Josh pulled out three bottles of Mike’s Hard Lemonade and popped off the bottlecaps with a bottle opener before pouring it straight into two plastic cups. 

He tucked the third bottle underneath his arm as you watched him curiously. Josh caught you eyeing his actions as he handed you the cup carefully. 

“ Why not just drink it straight from the bottle?” You asked as you watched Josh take a sip,” I feel like we’re hurting the environment.” 

“ Looks cooler in a red solo cup,” Josh admitted bashfully as he clinked his cup with yours. 

You took a small sip, expecting it to burn like how it was always described in coming of age books but surprisingly, the fizzy taste of citrus wasn’t overpowering in any way. Josh raised his eyebrows and playfully nudged your shoulder,” See! It’s good, right? If you drink enough of these, I’m sure anyone could get tipsy but the goal of this party is to actually remember it the next day.”

There was just something about Josh that made you feel so much safer than anyone else. He didn’t tease you for never having gone to a party before or having alcohol; if anything he did his best to make sure you were as comfortable as possible. 

“ You’re being unreasonably cool, you know that right?” 

Josh smiled as he reached for your hand instinctively for the third time that night,” Only for you baby.” 

Smooth smooth Josh. Like putty in his hands, he led you back to the backyard but the whole time, you felt your heart practically melt at him calling you baby. 

Was it pathetic how easily you leaned into his touch? Maybe. 

But god, he really did make things harder for you. You had come into this party with your eyes on another guy and yet, Josh always managed to turn up the charm whenever necessary and you ate it up. 

Josh might be the charming, golden boy but you knew you couldn’t be too naive. Everyone had flaws, maybe Josh’s was that he was too nice and too friendly, or possibly him being a complete lightweight was the only thing holding him back in life. 

Lucky bastard. 

Once you made it to the backyard, you found Kim with a towel around her body, sitting on one of the lawn chairs. Josh walked over and whistled at Kim to look up from her phone, to which he handed her the bottle of Mike’s and she sounded a quick thanks in response. 

“ I’m gonna warm up with the guys. We’re only going to play a quick set but after, I’m all yours,” Josh promised as his cheeks started to get red at his own words but he turned back around at an attempt to hide his face. 

You took a seat next to Kim as you felt your heart practically skip a beat,” He’s really something isn’t he?”

“ Mm, he’s something alright,” Kim sighed as she struggled to open up the bottle,” dumb bitch, he didn’t bring a bottle opener or something?” 

“ It’s the thought that counts!” You said back as Kim popped the bottle cap using the metal part of the lawn chair.

As you listened to Josh’s band start their first song, you couldn’t help but feel guilty on how you were feeling. A part of you was holding on to the idea of you and Peter being a possibility but things were always so complicated with him. 

There was more to lose in being with Peter and it was painfully obvious that Josh made things so incredibly easy. You didn’t need to walk on eggshells when you were with him and sure, things were new and always changing but Josh could eventually be a person you could lean on. 

You reminded yourself that Peter “loved” you and that you did feel something for him that Josh couldn’t make you feel, but it wasn’t real love and that alone completely sobered you up from your moodiness,” Cheers Kim.” 

She watched as you drank whatever was left in your cup but Kim only ooo’d, knowing it wasn’t enough to get you drunk. 

You shook your head as you tried to think of anything but Peter. Tonight was your night to be free and you didn’t want to have to worry about who would be waiting for you once you got back home. 

And yet, deep down, you wondered why a part of you felt like it wasn’t right to hold Josh’s hand. Maybe because you knew you liked holding Peter’s more. Even as you looked up at Josh who stole a few glances your way, you silently prayed that it was Peter up on that stage instead. 

“ I can’t do this,” You said after a second of overthinking everything as you pulled your phone out of your pocket,” I need to text him.” 

“ Um fuck no! No drunk texts, that shit is so embarrassing Y/N!”

“ This is less than 5% alcohol, I am definitely not drunk Kim,” You mumbled as you slapped her hand away and pulled out your phone to text Peter,” I thought you were on team Peter?” 

Y/N: I need you

Y/N: *address*

Kim watched as you texted Peter but before you could send it, Kim leaped out of her seat and snatched the phone out of your hand,” I swear-! Yes, I am a new fan of team Peter, although Josh is getting major brownie points, but I have been a loyal member of team Y/N way before anyone else. I’m doing you a favor, what is texting him going to solve?” 

You pouted as Kim slipped your phone into her bag, unbeknownst to the both of you that the message had accidentally sent. 

“ Now get the hell up and lets dance bitch!”

                                                         ------

You and Kim had perfected your mental state to a tee; not drunk enough to trip over air and make complete fools of yourselves but tipsy enough to where even the slightest look at each other was enough to make you break out into a fit of laughter. 

You still ‘danced like people were watching’ but you managed to still let loose enough to where the music flowed so freely between your fingertips. 

“ Josh you guys were great!” You shouted as you pulled him into a surprise hug, which he happily accepted,” I think I’m officially your number one fan now.”

“ Wait in line,” Kim scoffed playfully as she grabbed her bag from the floor,” I’m gonna go get a cheese plate or something. Don’t do anything gross while I’m gone.” 

You shot her a prompt ‘ why would you say that’ with your eyes before turning back to face Josh. You weren’t sure where things would go next but he took your hand and led you to the other side of the backyard to a wooden bench, claiming that he just wanted to rest a bit after singing for so long. 

The bench was small enough to where your thigh was against his but you didn’t mind the contact. 

“ Thanks for coming out by the way. I know these type of things are pretty overwhelming but I’ve been having fun so far. How about you?” Josh asked as you exhaled deeply. 

“ I’m glad I came...thank you again for convincing me to come out here. I feel like there’s been a lot of stuff going on at home and it’s kind of nice being a normal teenager for once,” You said honestly as Josh rolled his shoulders back. 

You could feel how nervous he was next to you but for the most part, he didn’t really show it from his facial expression. 

“ Can I ask you something?” 

You nodded, trying your best to be as cool as possible but all you could think about was how dry your mouth felt. 

Oh fuck, the million-dollar question was finally here, wasn’t it? Was he going to reveal his feelings? What if he was going to make a move?

“ Is there something going on between you and Peter? The other day when I came over, it felt...intense. I didn’t want to overstep by coming over or anything,” Josh hesitated as he tested the waters. 

Oh. 

Well fuck, that question was just as nerve-wracking as the others. You wanted to be as honest with Josh as possible but at the same time, you didn’t want to ruin any chances you had of possibly having him around if Peter didn’t work out. 

You knew that was such a shitty mindset but Josh had a way of making you feel so comfortable and you weren’t willing to let that go. 

“ I thought I had something with him but it’s complicated,” You answered honestly,” you saw him, he’s...sick and I feel like the sickness is making him feel things that aren’t actually there. I don’t know, it’s so weird to explain.” 

Josh bit his bottom lip nervously as he hung onto your every word,” So his feelings for you aren’t there like he thinks it is?” 

God, it sounded so simple the way Josh said it when it was so much worst in reality. Of course, it would be way easier to tell Josh everything from the toxic relationship you and Peter had to how the lovedust was emotionally and physically a toll on both of you. 

For obvious reason, you could never reveal that much to him. 

“ Yeah, exactly that,” You sighed, sounding a bit too disappointed and Josh had caught the shift in your voice,” feelings are always so complicated.”

“ Not all the time,” Josh said quickly as he caught himself,” I mean, liking someone doesn’t have to be complicated. Sometimes it’s really easy because love shouldn’t hurt, you know?” 

You only nodded because you could tell Josh had more to say. He took this opportunity to shift his body to fully face you and you scooted your back against the armrest so you could show him that you were attentive. 

“ I mean, when I like someone, all I think about is how much I like being around them. Everything else kind of just falls away and it feels all warm like how the books describe it,” Josh could feel a blush creep onto his cheeks yet again but he knew there was no point in covering it up now,” it’s a cliche but I think when you have a crush on someone, everything just falls into place... And I feel that when I’m with...you.”

Your heart practically drew closer to him because what is going on, this was different. Even though Peter had generally been saying the same things to you for days on end, this was more. 

There wasn’t some magic space dust that was making Josh confess his feelings, it was just pure humanistic drive to step out of one’s comfort zone that had tugged on Josh harder than ever before. 

As if time had slowed down, you watched closely as Josh placed his hand onto your knee before leaning in, getting dangerously close to your lips. Josh stopped only a mere centimeter before your lips touched, as if to give you a chance to back away and yet, you stood still. 

You were trying to make sense of what your heart and your gut were telling you but you thought back to Peter admitting to you that the love he felt for you was a side effect of the lovedust, nothing more and nothing less. 

Peter would never like you back. 

That’s what pushed you over the edge and so, you closed the gap between you and Josh as you kissed him back. You could feel Josh smiling against your lips but the pure sensation of the kiss didn’t last. 

Kim had witnessed everything in slow motion. The text from Peter, indicating that he had entered and was heading to the backyard to watching Josh lean in to kiss you. It was like a sick hypothetical they always asked in ethics classes when presenting the Trolley Dilemma and yet, she barely had enough time to make a decision. 

All she could do was shout but it was a little too late. Peter saw everything. 

He saw you close the space between your lips and Josh’s. He saw Josh smile against your lips. He saw you pull away before leaning in for more. 

Peter knew what was coming next, he practically braced for the pain that he knew was coming because just earlier the same day, he had a miniature version of it. But he never expected the pain to be this unbearable. 

His ribs felt like someone had just swung a bat into the center of his chest and he could feel every bone splitting into various small fragments that were too small to ever glue back together. Each little fragment of whatever was left had seemingly pierced his heart in a thousand different places as more and more pressure starting to build in his chest. 

He couldn’t even let out a cry for help, not even a whimper because no air could come in through his mouth. 

The fear alone made his chest tighten up to the point where he felt his lungs almost give in from inside of him. His vision was the next to get blotched out with a violent array of reds and oranges, moving at a fast kaleidoscopic rhythm that sent Peter deeper into a panic.

The last to give was his legs; the dizziness from the complete distortion had made his knees buckle from the pain, sending him straight into the pool. 

You heard Kim cry out first as she pushed her way through a crowd that was blocking the door. You moved away from Josh to find the commotion and even though you couldn't see who fell into the water, you knew deep down who it was. 

You ran over to the edge of the pool and without a second thought, you dived into the water. Josh quickly followed behind you; it took him only a second to kick off his shoes before he jumped in after you. 

What scared you the most was how eerily quiet it was underwater. You could hear some muffled shouts but that’s not what was so quiet. His body was motionless in the water, there was no sign of struggling or thrashing or convulsing like how it was in the movies. 

Everything just felt slow as you desperately reached your arms out to swim faster to him. You only had one focus once you wrapped your arms across his chest and kicked up to the surface. In your mind, you were already going through how you would start compressions on him once you reached the top. 

You were panicked and scared but you knew you had to pull yourself together, pushing away any thoughts of how far gone Peter could be. 

You broke the surface with Peter in your arms as you called out to someone, anyone to take him from your arms. Kim and one of Josh’s bandmates helped lift Peter’s lifeless body onto the concrete as Kim quickly called 9-1-1. 

Her hands were shaking as she tried to press the three buttons and after an eternity, they picked up the phone. 

You scrambled up from the pool and hovered over Peter’s body and without a second thought, you started doing CPR. 

For a moment, that’s all you were thinking. Like a machine, over and over again on an endless cycle, chest compressions, open his airway, give rescue breaths. When you found yourself thinking about how panicked everyone else was and how pale Peter looked underneath you, you continued to give compressions until you felt like your arms would snap from the pressure. 

You don’t know how much time has passed but enough to where there would’ve been a sign by now. You sobbed for Peter and kept calling out to him, your voice shaking like a child, the same child who lost her parents all those years ago. The same child who held that heavy towel, pressing it against her fathers chest to stop the bleeding- no. 

You couldn’t think about that, this was different. You could save him. You kept reminding yourself over and over as you did a round of chest compressions, opened his airway, and gave more rescue breaths. Over and over. Non-stop. 

Again and again without hesitation. 

At this point, you couldn't stop your mind from thinking of Peter and the possibility of him actually dead. How long was he under? What had happened before? He must’ve seen the kiss- oh my god you killed him. 

You can feel it, building up inside of you like an unstoppable path set ablaze like pure lava. 

You thought about never hearing his laugh again, the one where he would grip his sides so hard, he would wheeze like an old dog toy. Chest compressions. Airway. Rescue breaths. 

You thought about him never calling out your name, whether it was followed by an insult or a loving comment about how you made him feel. Chest compressions. Airway. Rescue breaths. 

You thought about never touching him again, his strong arms holding your shaking body when you had that awful nightmare or how perfect his hand fit in yours when you two walked together in the rain. Chest compressions. Airway. Rescue breaths. 

You thought about never telling him how you actually felt, how stupid you were forever letting him get away because it was him all along. Chest compressions. Airway. Rescue breaths. 

It was always him. 

You were in love with Peter. 

And suddenly, almost finally, Peter jolted up and coughed up the water from his lungs. 

You stopped the compressions and held your own breath as Peter continued to cough up more water, his eyes squeezed shut. 

“ Peter? Can you hear me?” You called out between your choked cries as you snapped your fingers close to his ear.

After a moment, an agonizing moment, Peter nodded, as everyone else collectively let out the breath they didn’t know they were holding. Peter opened his eyes slowly, taking in everything like it was his first time seeing the world. 

“ Oh thank god, don’t worry, help is coming. Stay awake for me, okay?” You sighed in relief as you tucked a strand of wet hair behind your ear,” I’m so glad you’re okay.” 

When his eyes lock onto yours, he feels an odd sense of deja vu that he can’t explain. His chest isn’t tight anymore, his hands don’t feel as clammy as before, his mind feels almost cleared. 

He focused on your eyes while everything else drowned out around him. Your pupils, they’re big and they’re filled with a heavy deal of worry but there’s something else. Your eyes, he’s looked into them so many times before but why is it different? 

As shaken up as you are, you manage to cup his face carefully to console him, or more so yourself. Your hands are shaking but they’re warm against his cheek and he can’t help but reach his hand to lay across the hand that’s cupping his face. 

Peter feels his face flush, but this time it’s different, it’s...euphoric? Peter wasn’t even sure if he was saying the word correctly but that’s how he felt. 

Your eyes, he’s so enamored by the way you’re looking at him. You were worried of course, but no, there was something else. 

“ You’re safe Peter, you’re okay.” 

“ Don’t worry I got you.”

“ Just breath for me, okay?” 

There it was, the same deja vu. You had said that to him before, or maybe he had said it to you before through broken sobs when you had the nightmare. 

Peter’s breath hitched as it all finally hit him, he figured it out just by holding your deep gaze. 

Oh my god.

The lovedust had worn off, it was gone. All the anxiety and nerves from having it in his system had disappeared, evaporated off of him almost. The chest pains and the shortness of breath had gone away but Peter still felt something pulling, tugging at his heartstrings. 

The lovedust was gone, he knew that well enough.

 The only thing he could feel as he stared back at you was a pure, undivided, longing for you. 

That’s right, Peter Parker was still hopelessly in love with you, no lovedust required.

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[oveliagirlhaditright]

Trust Me Coda

The ending to the Joshyme story I wrote years ago "Trust Me", that I've since deleted. I was hoping, that with the Way Back Machine, I could get all the chapters back and post it again and include this as the ending. But unfortunately, the Way Back Machine only gives me the first chapter (maybe someday I can find a way to get it all back). So I'm posting the ending by itself. It can be read and enjoyed by itself, as it also summarizes some things that happened in "Trust Me."

How They Met

Rhyme’s PoV

“Raimu… you’re reading the Shiver series? What if I started calling you ‘Ringo’, since that’s what Cole calls Sam in that series? You both have names that begin with ‘R’, yes?”

…Somehow, Rhyme just knew that this was Joshua who had suddenly appeared beside her and was asking this question. Even though she’d never met him before and had only heard horror stories from Beat, Shiki, and Neku. Because who else would so brazenly come up to her and ask such a question? As if he’d known her whole life and she owed him an answer for reading such bad literature in his eyes?

Blinking at the ashen-aired boy here at Molco, while she waited for Beat and Neku to get their Tin Pins that they were shopping for, Rhyme couldn’t help feeling a little incredulous here. “Really? You make yourself known to the Player you just randomly bring back to life even though she didn’t win—which must be a huge deal—and that’s what you have to ask? Honestly, I expected more from you, Joshua—if you don’t mind me calling you that—from what I’ve heard about you.”

Joshua chuckled at this… which Rhyme saw as a good sign, and as a hint that he wasn’t angry that she wasn’t poking fun at him and wasn’t going to turn her back into a Squirrel Noise again. But he still seemed to want to want to insult her, however, she noted with a frown on her face. “I can’t believe you’re reading something like Twilight. I expected better from you, Raimu.”

Rhyme really wanted to let Joshua have it here. She did (and usually she was such a nice person, too!). Because first off, where did he get off insulting her literary choices? And why was he being a creep, anyway?

But deciding to be the responsible little sister that Beat had always looked up to her for, Rhyme smiled and decided to be the bigger person and extended a hand Joshua’s way for him to shake… which he did very reluctantly, as the sun seemed to get in his eyes. “Why don’t we just start over here. I’m Rhyme, and who are you?”

“…I’m Joshua, I suppose. Though I really don’t know if I want to play along here, dear Raimu. Though I guess I’ll bite, and give this to you… Why are you reading Inkheart? You are reading that series at the same time as that horrible Shiver series, right? Actually, that is a good question. Do tell.” That was the first question Joshua had asked Rhyme when they met, when he came to see her in Molco when day when she was reading outside in the beautiful sunlight, waiting for Beat to come back out and join her after he’d bought some new Tin Pins.

Rhyme had turned around to happily tell the stranger why she was reading the book, because she loved having conversations with people about literature, but then she was met with the look of who could only have been the Composer of Shibuya, based off Beat, Neku, and Shiki’s descriptions of him, in order to keep her safe.

“I-” Rhyme suddenly stammered here. Because she was suddenly afraid of Joshua, as memories of what Beat, Neku, and Shiki had said came back to her. She was afraid that her reasons for reading this particular saga might upset him, and he might even strike her down for them. What to say here, then? Rhyme panicked. Or maybe she shouldn’t say anything?

“Do you like the fact that Mortimer and Meggie don’t believe in gods?” Joshua filled in her silence, smirking, as he played with a strand of his hair.

And Rhyme really thought that she had done something to offend him now—and that he might actually murder her in cold blood, like he had Neku—so she knew that she needed to find her words, and do something to make amends towards her savior.

So, taking a deep breath, Rhyme tried to do just that. “Even if I did… it wouldn’t be because of you, Joshua. I know you’re somewhat god-like. I just think it makes sense that those two characters would think legends about gods are all just stories, since they surrounded themselves with literature.”

“…Hmm. And perhaps it does, Raimu. Perhaps it does.”

Joshua was sitting beside Rhyme now; he had simply been standing before. And curiously… he was sitting rather close to her—not like a lover might; not quite that—but he also wasn’t at all caring about her need for space. And he stole Rhyme’s book from her before she could even blink, and flipped it to a certain page (it didn’t escape her attention that he left the Shiver sequel, “Linger”, alone. He must have really hated that book for some reason, which made it even weirder that he did, in fact, start calling her “Ringo.” Though Rhyme oddly didn’t mind. Perhaps she was too nice). “What do you think of Dustfinger having a thing for Mortimer’s wife?”

Though Rhyme could tell that that wasn’t the question Joshua had wanted to ask; and she told him as such, as she gingerly tried to take the novel back from him. “If you think I’m reading this because of the Game… I’m surprised you don’t ask if I think characters getting pulled into the fictional Inkheart world, is like Players going into the UG when they die. Joshua… can you be honest, and not make this all about tomes right now, and tell me what you really want with me? I’m sure it’s not this. Honesty is always the best policy, right?”

“Hehehe,” the might-as-well-demi-god laughed, as he put his legs over Rhyme’s… not in a sexual way. But in a teasing one, as if he was showing he was comfortable with her and didn’t understand social norms at all. “I suppose it is, huh, Raimu? That being said… I came to visit you, because I did think you forgot who so kindly brought you back to life, and wasn’t thanking him. And because I wanted to see if bringing you back to life was worth it… fortunately for you, I certainly think it was.”

That was certainly a lot to process! And there was a part of Rhyme that wanted to slap Joshua for thinking she owed him gratitude for not playing with her life, while another side of her wanted to grovel in gratitude at his feet for what he had done for her and Beat (Rhyme knew Beat never would have ever gotten over it if she hadn’t come back. So, she almost appreciated Joshua more for his sake than her own).

Rhyme also wanted to know how, exactly, she had proved to Joshua that she was “worth it”… and if she could do anything to ruin that idea in his head. Though hopefully not!

But before Rhyme got the chance, Neku and Beat were leaving the store to join her, and Joshua was disappearing, with the words, “We’ll meet again, Rhyme, and talk for real. I promise,” just barely heard in her ears.

…

And Rhyme and Joshua did meet up after that… a few times, actually. He showed up to one of their group hang-outs, where they’d decided to make pocky, and ended up helping Rhyme with that (when everyone else went to get sauces), when it was clear she was a disaster in the kitchen, she thought…

And then one time when she was at school… and they’d doodled some together, while they’d sat on the green—getting grass stains—and then after that, at a dance, weirdly enough (that Rhyme thought Joshua had only gone to because it reminded him of his deceased parents. She, however, had been forced to go, because her parents had been trying to make more of a girl out of her. And they’d danced together, as Joshua had reluctantly told her some of his backstory before he stomped off).

But even with all of the mixed feelings and signals… the two of them had fallen in love. But neither one of them were fools. And they knew if they really wanted to be together, Rhyme might have to die for it to happen—which made things taxing for them, too—but even with that… they had found happiness.

One of their best times being when Rhyme let Joshua brush her hair, and she ended up relating a story to him that she thought she’d never tell anyone.

“For the longest time… I actually didn’t know how to brush my hair. At least not fully, to be able get all the tangles out, that is. I think that’s why I kept it short for so long.”

And thankfully, it showed just how far they had come, that Josh did not mock her for this. Instead, he began massaging her shoulder with one hand, while continuing to take care of her hair with the brush in the other. “Is this because you’re autistic? I’ve often wondered if that’s why you’re so smart. And sometimes, autistic people have a hard time doing normal, every day things, and can almost need caretakers for them, but do genius things to make up for it… and there’s no shame in that. You just see the world differently.”

“Yes,” Rhyme admitted, placing a hand over her heart now, and leaning back to kiss Joshua on the cheek once. And he leaned into her gesture, she noticed, smiling. “It took me a while to figure that out. But I think it’s the answer. And I’m not ashamed of it anymore. Even if I hadn’t figured out how to style my hair… I wouldn’t hate who I am. Especially since, in so many areas, I am a genius, as you say… And thanks for saying that, Josh. Though I swear I’m not fishing for compliments here.”

Joshua “hmmed” at that, almost like he didn’t believe Rhyme (though she knew he was just acting). And she thought about bumping him on the head… but then they turned to face each other and both burst out laughing. And they somehow found their way into each other’s arms, too, with Rhyme’s back against Joshua’s chest and his chin on her head.

“As if I think you’d ever do something as selfish as ‘fish for compliments,’ Raimu,” Joshua told her, rolling his eyes.

“Hey! I’m not that selfless now, I’ll have you know…” Rhyme protested. “But in all seriousness,” Rhyme pretty much hummed here, “can we stay like this forever, Josh?”

“Yes, dear,” he promised, starting to remove her clothes, so they could tenderly make love. “I think we can.”

…

But their happiness wasn’t meant to last.

Joshua had angered the previous Composer of Shibuya (Jeffrey), who he actually hadn’t killed (and who had instead ascended to become an Angel), and the current Setagaya Composer (when he had murdered the old one accidentally… when he’d been fighting the hold Composer of Shibuya to become the new one and had erased Setagaya’s, when he’d been standing right on the line that separated Shibuya from Setagaya, and Setagaya’s Conductor had had to step up). As, if he wished it, he could be both the Composer of Shibuya and Setagaya.

Because of that, the Conductor, Rinoa(1), who had stepped up as Setagaya’s Composer had always feared that Josh would try to take their throne.

And Shibuya’s former Composer—who had been an elder to Josh, somewhat like Sanae, who Josh had forced to ascend, lest he kill him, and Josh didn’t want that—was afraid that he would try to become Composer of both places and become even more powerful than the Angels, perhaps.

And there was even more to the story than that.

And they wanted revenge on him.

And to do that, they murdered Rhyme… they actually locked her in a meat cellar, so she would freeze to death. By the time Josh and Mr. H found her, she had already been fading away. And Joshua had then done something that no Composer or Angel was supposed to do (and Rhyme had found all of this out far too late), which was go back in time one day so he could save her… But it had had its consequences.

Josh had targeted the Composer and Angel’s loved ones so they’d know what it was like to lose the one they loved, and maybe leave Rhyme alone… but in seeing this hatred and destruction from Joshua, for no good reason in her eyes—and thinking that maybe he was the monster she’d feared all along—Rhyme had broken up with him… and doomed Joshua to fall to darkness even more.

But things hadn’t ended there, either.

Because of course the Angel and Composer wanted to try and steal Joshua’s powers back. Of course they did. And thankfully, Joshua had had the good sense to come clean and explain everything to Rhyme a week before everything went down, so they could try to plan for the worst accordingly.

Joshua had stayed in the Room of Reckoning, and the Composer and Angel had sent quite a few Conductors and Reapers after Josh.

And Josh, after everything, was too heartless to really fight back. Partly because Rhyme was being horrible in not telling him she loved him and that they were of course going to get back together, she knew, but it was all too much and she needed a bit more time to process here.

And honestly, as it was, Rhyme was afraid that with the way Joshua was acting, even he and Sanae together wouldn’t be able to win against these Reapers and Jeffrey and Rinoa when they made their appearance. Which was when she came up with an idea.

“Sanae,” Rhyme begged now, as Joshua and her world was falling apart (and how much of her world was in Joshua, she realized now. She loved him so much! And she was foolish for ever having doubted him and risking this. But Rhyme knew that if she told Josh this now, it wouldn’t change anything. It wouldn’t affect his morale, as he would think she was just lying for him), “can you fly me to where Joshua first became Composer and put me into the UG there?”

“I can…” he allowed. “But you’ll be vulnerable without your Partner, Joshua. Though I suppose I can stay and help you for a moment. What are you-”

“Actually, it’s the fact that Josh and I are Partners in every sense of the word that I’m counting on.”

So, Sanae held Rhyme in his arms, and flew her out of her Shibuya River and up, up, up into the sky and further away from Shibuya and Joshua—and how Rhyme prayed to him that she was making the right choice here—and closer to Setagaya.

Once there, the first person she saw was Rinoa. And of course she would be here and wouldn’t have left yet. Rhyme could only hope that she could make a big enough show to get the bigger threat, the angel, to show up here, too, and not just this sniveling girl with the stiff upper lip.

“Where’s Jeffrey?” Rhyme demanded, as she wasted not even a second and sent lightning flying Rinoa’s way with her pin in hand.

And the blonde with the near white hair (gosh, was she blonde. And maybe her hair had even gotten lighter with her Composer powers. And perhaps that had even led to her becoming as entitled as she had? Would Rhyme become the same way if she chose this fate, she feared?) didn’t waste a moment in sneering at Rhyme for her efforts and sending earth magic her way with her own pin.

And though Sanae tried his best to dodge it, the rippling earthquake sliced Rhyme’s left leg open a decent amount as they moved and she cried in pain.

“Nowhere you need to know, girly. You should know this is above you, anyway. You only ever learned how to use just one psych, didn’t you? What are you going to do with just lightning?”

“The key, though, is being clever with it,” Rhyme challenged, sending a blast right at Rinoa’s heart, as Sanae got them to the ground and desperately tried to heal Rhyme’s leg. Rinoa shrieked in pain. And Rhyme felt bad for having guessed right, that even in death the arteries and joints that would have hurt you if injured while alive, would still hurt you badly if touched in the afterlife… But she had to save Joshua, so she didn’t have time to worry about it right now.

“Rhyme, as silly as it is, Angels can’t use healing pins like Players can,” Sanae whispered to her now, reaching into a bag he’d been smart enough to bring with him to look for gauze to try and wrap her leg in. “I guess who or whatever’s even higherup than us feels we’d be too powerful if we could use magic as well as pins. But if I use some of my powers here healing you, I may exhaust myself so I can’t help you and J later.”

Rhyme was about to tell Mr. H that it was fine: that while she was in a great deal of pain right now, she had figured that that would be the case for a lot of this, and had tried to mentally prepare herself to be able to withstand it.

But, of course, the real deal was something else entirely. Rhyme found herself biting her lip quite a few times, so she wouldn’t start crying, and so that Mr. H wouldn’t feel horrible upon seeing it.

But before she could get the words out, Rinoa had already recovered and was running headlong at Rhyme with a sword pin. And Rhyme just barely whipped her own shield one out to try and be able to parry. And she was able to dodge a few strikes. And she was amazed that she was able to do just that, as her knees tried to buckle under her weight, for Rinoa was unfortunately right that Rhyme wasn’t the best Player.

And as such, Rhyme eventually lost hold on the shield psych, and had to attempt the lightning psych once again, to try and use as a defense… which was more than faulty, since thunder in her hand hurt her, as well, but it was better than if an enemy had been throwing it at her, or if she’d just been being hammered on by Rinoa’s attack.

“Stop. Please, stop!” Rhyme cried out. “I know we can reason about this, if we just talk!” Rhyme had of course come here planning to erase Rinoa and Jeffrey if it came down to it—as she doubted they would give her another choice—but Joshua had changed so much for the better in loving her. She knew that he would give up being the Composer, and just return to the RG to be with her, if they gave him the option (though she knew he, as well as her, would hate the idea of leaving Shibuya to these monsters). But they were so out for blood, Rhyme doubted that they would see reason, but she would try, as her face started to bleed now, and the night sky took on a yellow color because of this intense light show.

“Rinoa, we don’t have to do this! Just get over your hate for Joshua and stop! You all partly brought this on yourselves, you know, by destroying his family and perceiving him as a bigger threat than he is. He didn’t mean to get the power of two Composers, so…”

And here Rinoa tipped her head back and laughed uproariously at Rhyme. Sanae, bless his heart, flew to Rhyme now and got her out of some of the line of fire. She knew he couldn’t interfere here much (as Producer, and since then it would be like he was trying to become two Composers plus an Angel), but he could still defend her some. “That’s rich, little girl,” the blonde whispered now, while looking at her nails that she had bitten to the quick. “I’ve been told a lot of lies as an elite. But I think you’ve been told even more for being in love. Clearly someone who once thought of destroying all of Shibuya is on a power high and wants that power… I almost feel bad for you for believing his lies. Step aside, little one, and Jeffrey and I won’t erase you for your infuriating Partner.”

“What’s most of all infuriating is murdering someone’s parents in cold blood, just because he can see the UG as a child, and you think he will be a threat to you. It’s not infuriating. It’s cruel, cold, disgusting, and inhumane. Especially since you two destroyed Joshua’s parents through beheading. Beheading! And then what you did to Rhyme... ” Sanae said the words that Rhyme had so desperately wanted to here, as he bravely stood in front of her to protect her.

His voice was furious, and Rhyme couldn’t blame him for that in the slightest. She was furious about what they had done to Joshua’s parents. And Sanae had known about this longer than Rhyme had, and had had even longer for this to make his blood boil.

But at the same time… his body language wasn’t hostile. He had a hand outstretched towards Rinoa, as if trying to tell her it wasn’t too late for her to end all this hostility and make amends, but Rhyme in her heart of hearts knew she wouldn’t take the olive branch.

And she didn’t.

She started shooting fire at the two of them now.

And then, Jeffrey appeared from the Higher Plane.

Rhyme really only knew about him from what Joshua had been able to tell her of the Angel. While he’d been able to use some magic to show her some memories he had of Rinoa, Josh wasn’t powerful enough to do that for an Angel. But he was as she would have expected: someone carrying a war hammer, and desperately trying to look stronger, for having been born with a “weak-sounding” name, perhaps.

“Yoshiya really sent his girl to face us and do his job?! Get out of the way, girl, or I’ll squash you flat!” “His name is Joshua,” both Rhyme and Sanae countered now, as Rhyme rolled out of the way of Jeffrey’s hammer and then Sanae helped her get out of the way of roses that Rinoa had tried to aim at her, like she was Tuxedo Kamen or something.

“No, it’s not,” Jeffrey argued. At which point, Rhyme just glowered at him. How had Joshua ever been close to this guy? It was clear that whatever love they had once had was long lost. And also… why were they standing having a discussion here, while these two were trying to kill them? Rhyme almost would have rather had the violence without the aimless talking, thank you very much!

“It’s Yoshiya!” Jeffrey continued on, much to Rhyme and Sanae’s annoyance. Rhyme continued to glare. Rinoa looked at them with a gloating look on her face, as if she thought all of this was true, too. And Sanae, seeming annoyed, and sensing a break in the answer, fished into his bag and started eating coffee beans. “Which sounds like ‘Yeshua.’ And even though everything about him was a load of bologna—and ‘Joshua’s’ parents only named him ‘Yoshiya’ so he’d fit in Japan better, when they really wanted it to just be ‘Joshua’—the name on his legal documents being so close to ‘Yeshua’ still seems to indicate he was made for great things. And I can’t stand for that. For that reason, he must die.”

“And so must you, for calling him ‘Yoshiya!’” Rhyme yelled furiously, charging at both menaces now.

And it was with her rage for everything they had done to Joshua—and them not even respecting his identity and wishes for his name now—that she finally snapped and put her full plan into effect. Rhyme pushed the two of them onto the line dissecting Shibuya and Setagaya and stood there herself.

And she then thought of Joshua, and their bond in every way: how they were eventually Partners in the Game, but also Partners in every sense in the word (she remembered the time he had tried to seduce her by touching her back. And she had had her clothes on, and really it shouldn’t have had a large effect on her at all. But since it was them, and they were so bonded, it had. It had).

Eventually, she and Joshua would marry… and, legally, what was his would be hers (in the eyes of the RG, at least. But Rhyme was banking on that being enough here). And so, she chose to be Composer of both Shibuya and Setagaya like he had the right to do, and encased herself in lightning.

Rhyme absolutely shook with power, but did not feel like she was losing herself, and she erased these two like it was the simplest thing in the world. With a snap of her fingers.

And Sanae breathed the sigh of relief that Rhyme herself couldn’t right now, because she still felt horrible for her actions, and somewhat at a loss with this power.

But finally… it was done, and these two’s hate for Joshua would never touch him again.

And the followers of these two should have been giving up now, if they sensed an all-powerful Composer was coming their way and Joshua would finally—finally—be safe.

They would all finally be safe.

Crying, as she began flying back to Shibuya now—her city, for the time being—with Sanae by her side—Rhyme told her companion, “Let’s get back to that kid, who needs us more than anything.”

And Sanae laughed, flying closer to her, so he could wrap an arm around her shoulder. “You got it, R.”

He’d officially adopted her into the family.

And Rhyme grinned. “The more the merrier with the letter nicknames, huh?”

And honestly? She couldn’t have been happier?

…

Once Rhyme made it back to the Room of Reckoning, she instantly wanted to run to Joshua and wrap him up in her arms. He definitely looked the worse for wear. Even more than she did right now: Probably because she was the Composer of Shibuya at the moment, and Setagaya, and thus that massive energy was healing her.

But she knew that she couldn’t.

To do so now, would make Joshua look weak, while he was still surrounded by Reapers, surprisingly, and any one of them could make a move to erase him now, if they weren’t careful.

Rhyme did settle on yelling to him, “Joshua, I love you… and I’m sorry for everything. If you’ll still have me, I’ll be with you and marry you!” however.

And never had she been so tactless and reckless, perhaps. But she thought if it would do the duty of giving hope to one that had been so without hope before—the one she loved most of all—she would happily look silly.

And Joshua caught Rhyme’s glance from across the room then, and he smirked at her: he was gazing at her as though she was the big man on campus for being the Composer of two areas right now, and she supposed she technically she was. And for now, that was enough and would have to do.

There also might have been lust in his eyes, but she was not focusing on that now. No, she wasn’t!

“So, as you can see,” Joshua said, flipping a strand of his fabulous hair, as he stood atop his throne—even as a mere Player now—and looked down at the Reapers below him, as if they were mere insects. “My Partner and I have a million schemes up our sleeves. Go now, if you don’t want to be erased like your superiors were. There might even be a promotion in it for you social climbers, if you act accordingly. Hehe.”

And since most Reapers were angling for the spot of Composer, and would want it now that that spot would soon be open in Setagaya (once Rhyme let that power go, and gave Joshua his proper title of Shibuya Composer back), they didn’t have to be told twice.

Rhyme could barely make out that one of the Reapers was redheaded with blue sunglasses… that another was a bigger man with long black hair, and that the strongest one seemed to be a dark-skinned little boy, who actually seemed about to help Joshua, rather than hurt him, she could see now, as he’d been leaning towards him with healing energy in his hand…, before they were all flying away, leaving Rhyme, Joshua, and Sanae alone.

“Joshua, I can give you powers back right now, if you want,” Rhyme whispered, the moment that everyone was gone. And she found herself by his side before she could even blink, hating how he was slouched over and injured like this. “Because if you steal something, you spend your whole life trying to keep it, and-”

Really, Rhyme had no idea why she’d said just that. And perhaps that was why she had quickly cut herself off. She didn’t mean to keep Joshua’s powers, of course. And he knew it well, too. It was just one of her silly adages that had come out of her mouth. And now, more than ever, did Rhyme hate how she seemed to say them at the drop of a hat.

She was about to try and back pedal and defend her position here—while Sanae guffawed at her lack of grace in the background… which was kind of like how her and Joshua’s whole relationship had started, huh?—but Josh actually seemed amused by her words, and moved in to kiss her as he laughed.

And it felt so good to kiss Joshua again! Rhyme found herself thinking, as she found her lips moving with his and their bodies becoming nestled together. Even without his Composer powers right now, loving him was like loving starlight, and Rhyme now honestly had no idea how she’d ever planned on giving any of this up.

“Hold onto them for now, dear,” Joshua told her, looking into her eyes for a long time and looking for nothing, something, or everything. Rhyme wasn’t sure which. “I’ll get them back soon enough, I know. But if you’re really going to become an Angel for me… it might be nice for me to fully understand what you’re giving up. And for you to try your future kind of power out, too. Anyway. What you did was so clever, Rhyme. I’d say I was proud of you. But I would have never expected less of you, Raimu. Of course you would just come up with the most genius plan to save the day. That’s just who you are.

“…But if you don’t mind, Rhyme. I think I’m going to take a nap right now. My body needs to heal. And it’s been a long time since I’ve really needed to sleep, so it might be nice to try it out just once”

There was a part of Rhyme that couldn’t believe that Josh didn’t want to sleep with her, or at least cuddle, now that they were finally back together again, and after everything they’d just been through together. But finding that she was at least mentally tired herself, Rhyme thought that that was the best idea in the world here, and curled up with him on his throne, and closed her eyes.

Joshua’s laziness wasn’t the worst thing in the world, really. Sometimes, it could even be inspiring.

…And soon, the two of them felt another body joining them, as well. It was Sanae, Rhyme knew. And Joshua woke up for a moment at that, to glare at him. But Sanae just puckered his lips at Josh, and then just leaned in ever closer to Josh and Rhyme, so Josh gave up and went back to sleep.

If Rhyme had to guess, Sanae wasn’t really exhausted—and truly couldn’t get exhausted—but perhaps just wanted to cuddle the two of them after everything that had just happened, where he might have thought he might lose two of his favorite kids. Or maybe he was messing with them some. Or just wanted to spend time with them here, if he was going to have to go back to the Higher Plane for a little bit, to sort Jeffrey’s mess out.

And Rhyme was more than fine with that. She completely loved and trusted Sanae and saw him as a part of her precious family, that she was so glad to have now.

So, in the arms of two men she loved more than anything… even as a sort of god that really didn’t need sleep, Rhyme slept well, and felt like she was home.

And really, she was. She knew that she was.

Some Months Later

Joshua’s PoV

“Rhyme… are you sure you want this?” Joshua asked now, looking at this girl who truly looked like the sun and might as well have been the sun to him.

And usually, he hated the hyperbole. But how else was he supposed to feel after she had recently saved him as expertly as she just had? He just… loved her so much. And Josh was no longer afraid to think the word anymore. It just seemed like a simple truth to him, like how he would also gladly annoy Neku until the day the former-Player died.

And it was for the reason that Joshua adored her so much, that he was willing to let her go, if he thought there was even the slightest chance that her being without him would make her happier than being by his side would.

Josh seriously doubted that she would take him up on the offer to refuse him. In fact, as she stood above him now, about to ascend, she looked at him incredulously for voicing these thoughts and he chuckled, putting his hands in his pockets.

Rhyme had been standing on a raised platform, preparing to ascend. And though she didn’t have to actually be “up in the air” in order to do just that, she was putting on a show like she did have to. Clearly, she had been hanging out with Shiki and Eri too much for being so dramatic now… but Josh wouldn’t have had it any other way. He was glad she was becoming louder in voicing her desires.

As Rhyme gently stepped down the stairs to reach Joshua’s level now—in a room that might have been a wedding dress fitting area in another life—and he held her hand to help her down the steps, Joshua expected her to tell him one of her favorite sayings, perhaps. That a problem shared was a problem halved, so of course Rhyme would be helping him out this way.

But instead, Rhyme laid a gentle hand on his cheek, beamed at him with crooked teeth, and explained her vision to him with the most sky-colored eyes that Joshua had ever seen. And it was hard not to get lost in both and choke up a little.

And Joshua did choke up some. Because it was too much. All too much. After he’d been tortured as he had—and been left by Rhyme for what he’d thought to be forever; though he understood well why she’d done it. Oh, did he ever—to see and feel such grace. This kind of love was more than what his parents had ever given him, definitely.

“Joshua,” Rhyme whispered, her palm curling against his cheek and finding a strand of his hair there, too. And oh, when she unintentionally brushed her fingers through his lock of hair that way, it was good. So good. “I love you. I love you so much. I have for a long time now… And you know this—being able to read my mind and all, you creep,” and Rhyme giggled at the last thing she said, so Joshua would know that she didn’t truly mean the end part of that sentence.

And Joshua was certainly glad that she did. Because while he suspected it—and could have even gleaned it himself by listening to her thoughts, like she’d said—it was still better to hear it from her, in what, perhaps, truly was some kind of wedding here. “So… of course a part of me was always going to make this decision. But becoming Producer of Shibuya, as Sanae gets promoted so he can look into some of the Angels’ corruption, allows me to protect the city I love. It’s the best of both worlds. I can still be in Shibuya plenty.

“And, eventually, I’d die again and have to make this sort of decision, anyway. I’m just speeding up the process. And since I defeated Rinoa and Jeffrey… it’s like my body’s already begun to ascend, you know… So, I will happily do this, if it means you don’t have to be alone anymore. Trust me.” And Rhyme perhaps smiled wider at him than she ever had before. It was in her eyes, too, as she took his hand.

…“Trust me,” there was the lesson Joshua had wanted his Players to learn in his Game. It was what he had desperately hoped that Neku would, perhaps, to give him reason to save this wonderful place that Shibuya was. And, yes. Joshua did see Shibuya as wonderful now.

How could he not? In this room they were in, there was a large picture window just behind Rhyme. And Josh could see the green of Miyashita Park spilling in. He could see a man walking his dog… and a girl helping a little old man across the street… as well as all the beautiful multi-colored flowers that were starting to grow in the Spring here, that none other than Neku and Shiki had stopped to smell in this moment (though he suspected they might have also been giving Rhyme another subtle goodbye).

Shibuya—no, the world—really was a beautiful place. And Joshua could finally see it now, because of people like Rhyme, Sanae, Neku, Shiki, and Beat. And he wasn’t afraid to live life anymore. Rather, he wanted to make up for all the time he’d lost and he knew that this was a good place to start.

“…I do trust you, Rhyme. I love you. And I thank you for trusting me, even though there were times I didn’t deserve it.” There had been times when Joshua had been pretty abusive to Rhyme during their relationship—or at least unhealthy with her—and he hated himself for it.

But Rhyme understood it as being because of the trauma he’d gone through. And how he’d never really been taught how to love, as his parents had thought he was a freak for being able to see the UG. But he’d finally figured it all out. And he could make up for the past, by loving Rhyme better than she’d ever been loved every single day. It was the least he could do for someone who had treated him so selflessly and opened his eyes and soul.

“Joshua, you do deserve it. I promise you. It’s not your fault you’ve been hurt. And there’s so much good in you—good that I’ve ever seen—that’s growing every day, and I love to help that flourish. It’s my own personal garden, and I’m happy to be a gardener… But we’re talking about things we’ve already hashed out plenty of times. Hehe. Are you ready to go?”

“Has there ever been a time I haven’t been ready, Raimu?” Joshua quipped.

Rhyme swatted his arm for that, but it was all in good fun. They both laughed.

Joshua extended his wings then, so he could begin fly towards the Higher Plane, just above them.

And Rhyme watched him… and remembered when she’d been Composer just a little bit before, and drew upon that knowledge and power (even the intense love she’d felt then) so she could do the same thing. And she, too, grew wings, and joined Joshua as they flew about in the sky.

She would always join him, and stay with him forever.

Joshua’s PoV Towards the Start of This Story

Though Joshua would never admit it to anyone but himself after having met her… there was something about that Raimu girl, that he couldn’t put his finger on.

But she was interesting. And fun, perhaps. And she challenged him.

And his clairvoyance kicked in now—preparing to tell him some things, if he wished it—but Joshua pushed it back.

He would rather have the mystery.

Whatever was going to happen with Rhyme, he thought he was probably in for a wild ride with her… and as someone who had always liked fun that others might deem as weird, Joshua knew that he wouldn’t change it for the world, as he watched her gleefully join her brother and Neku now, with their Tin Pins in hand.

Author’s Note: (1) NOT Final Fantasy VIII’s Rinoa. I just chose to name her that for reasons I don’t entirely know now, but it’s not FFVII’s Rinoa. Sorry for any confusion that might cause.

And it should be mentioned that I don’t hate the Shiver series. LOL

I hope you all enjoyed:)

And if anyone remembers “Trust Me” from ages ago, are you glad it has an ending now? Let me know!

And happy reading!

And happy TWEWY days, now that we finally have a sequel! Hopefully we might get a third game, too!

Dedicated to Liz, Dina, and Nicole, if you're still around (heck, Saro, too. Because even though you never read "Trust Me", none of this would have been possible without you, dear), and everyone else who loved this story. I'm sorry I couldn't end this in the best way possible (with all the chapters together here), but I'm glad I finally ended it. Thanks for everything, guys! You're seriously the best!

[joaquinfeed]

Then, He Met You (Theodore Twombly x Reader)

Prompt: Theodore and Reader have been dating for a few months. He’s still insecure and worried about your relationship. Jealous!Theodore.

The scene in front of him was all too familiar to Theodore. Despite his brain telling him he was being irrational, he can feel the sliver of jealousy running through his veins like poison.

You laugh—God, he loves your laugh—and you blush, and you run your fingers through your hair. His eyes stay on you, hoping they can catch yours between the crowd, but they never do.

Anger wasn’t something that Theodore felt often. Happiness—sometimes. Sorrowful, regretful, apathetic, lost—often. But anger? Only a few times in his life had he ever let himself feel angry.

For a brief period, his mind wanders to Samantha. There were times when he questioned whether he would ever move on from her. He used to be tied down by the weight of his heart and felt nothing could ever set him free again.

Then, he met you.

You crashed into his life—quite literally—with your dazzling smile and alluring personality when you collided with him outside his workplace, Beautiful Handwritten Letters.

“I am so, so sorry!” You exclaim, already shoving your sweatshirt sleeve up against his button-up shirt to wipe off the coffee you just ‘threw’ at him.

Theodore just stares at you, not knowing what to say to the beautiful stranger who’s currently rubbing his chest. He lets out a small, nervous chuckle while reaching up to adjust his glasses.

“It’s okay. Don’t worry about it.”

“Are you sure? You look like you’re headed somewhere important,” You say, eyeing his tucked-in shirt and slacks.

“Just work. I have work,” Theodore gestures to the office building, and you follow his hand with your eyes until you’re peering at the tall establishment. “I just write letters.”

You turn back to him. “Letters?”

“Uh, yes,” He chuckles. “I write them for people who want to express something to someone, but they’re not exactly Shakespeare.”

“So, people pay you to write love notes and such? Doesn’t someone else writing it kind of, like, defeat the purpose?”

“I don’t think so. People are the ones feeling the emotions in the letters. All I’m doing is helping them write it out.”

You nod, a hint of a smile playing on your lips.

“Oh! Hey, what about your shirt?” You ask, suddenly remembering the events that led to this conversation.

He waves you off before moving to walk towards the office building.

“I don’t even like this shirt that much. I should probably be the one apologizing to you. Your coffee probably costs more than my shirt.”

“Maybe you can write me a letter to apologize.”

Theodore pauses outside the entranceway of his workplace to look at you with a curious gaze. A thoughtful smile makes its way onto his face before he says, “Maybe I can.”

Thinking about that experience usually brings a smile to his face. Still, as he stares at you across the room, he feels a new kind of feeling wash over him— jealousy.

Theodore agreed to come to this work party with you. So, he couldn’t understand why he was not at your side being introduced to the man that currently held your attention. All he could see was your hand softly touching the guy’s arm as you continued laughing at whatever the jerk was telling you.

On the other side of the room, you stand with—what was his name again?—trying to look for a reason to move on to other conversations without being rude. You’ve been talking to your coworker for a while, and your mouth is starting to feel numb from the number of times you’ve forced a laugh.

Normally, you would have left by now. But the man in front of you had the power to either promote you in your career or let you go. So, you’ve become accustomed to acting a little extra careful around him. This is precisely why you agree to leave the party to go grab a coffee with him. You pray this is the promotion talk you’ve been waiting for.

“I hate to leave, but I better get back to my boyfriend. He’s around here somewhere. After I talk to him, I’ll meet you out front, and we can go grab that drink,” You say, glancing around the room for Theodore. When you spot him, you wave to your coworker and quickly make your way over to him.

“Theo!”

He looks at you over the wine glass raised to his lips, barely acknowledging your existence. This makes you frown. Since when does Theodore not want to talk to you? Granted, it’s only been a few months since you started dating, but there hasn’t been a moment of it where he hasn’t wanted to talk.

“Is everything okay?”

He lets out a small ‘mmhm’ before continuing to drink from his glass.

“Okay… I don’t believe you. But I’ll let you tell me on your own time. So, I’ve got good news, baby.”

At this, Theodore perks up a little. He knows how important these parties are for socializing, and he hopes just as bad as you do—if not more—that you’ll be able to progress in your career.

“I think I’m going to get that job that we talked about! Think about it, Theo. By this time tomorrow, I could be making twice as much as I do now. Not only that, but this is another huge step towards my dream career.”

“That’s- that’s so great,” He smiles genuinely at you before engulfing you in a tight hug. “I’m so proud of you Y/N.”

“I don’t have the job yet, so don’t be too proud.”

“Don’t be silly. I know you’re going to get it.”

“Well, wish me luck tonight then,” You smile.

“Tonight?”

“Yep! I’m about to go grab coffee with that guy-“ You point over to your coworker, who you’re pretty sure is named Josh. “And we’re going to talk about the promotion. Hopefully.”

Theodore’s eyes land on the man from before, who he recognizes to be the same man that made his blood run cold just a few minutes prior.

“Are you sure you want to get coffee with him? You don’t seem sure that he’s going to promote you,” He reasons.

“Yeah,” You breathe out. “But I think, even if he doesn’t give it to me tonight, this could still help my chances later on.”

“Do you want me to come with you? Just in case he tries anything,” Theodore asks, and you chuckle slightly.

“No, no. He’s harmless. We’ll be fine.”

“Oh, okay. Well, I could still join you guys if you want.”

“Thanks, babe, but really, it’s okay.”

He nods, somewhat dejectedly. “I guess I’ll just walk home. Will I see you tonight?”

“Not sure. It might be pretty late when we leave, so I might just go back to my place. I’ll text you and let you know.”

It wasn’t until later that night when Theodore checked the time on his phone—1:34 AM—that he realized you weren’t going to text him after all.

The city lights glowed through the bedroom curtains, and it saddened him to know you were out there with someone other than him. Theodore sighed to himself; for just a brief moment, he wishes Samantha was here to talk to. Despite their grim and abrupt ending, he missed just how simple life was with her. She certainly wouldn’t be out with some guy talking about a job promotion.

He shook his head, trying to rid himself of these thoughts. He owed you the basic respect of not comparing you to his past partners; he has never done it before, and he does not want to start now. 

He clicked your name on his phone and sent you a couple of texts ranging from, “If you need me, you can call me,” to “just checking in.”

When Theodore woke from his restless sleep in the morning, he checked his phone only to see that you never responded to his messages. He didn’t want to come off as obsessive, but he was your boyfriend, and he’s allowed to be worried about you.

After getting ready in his usual attire, he races outside to start his walk to your apartment. By the time he exited the elevator to your floor, his hands were sweating. He knocked on your door before wiping his palms against the front of his slacks.

“Hey Theo,” Your eyebrows crease in confusion, but you shoot him a smile nonetheless. “Did we have a breakfast date planned?”

“No, no. I just wanted to check in, see how your night went last night,” He reaches up to adjust his glasses nervously.

“Oh. It went okay. We didn’t really talk about career stuff, but I did let him know that it would be something I’m interested in. So, maybe he’ll remember that,” You shrug. “Also, I got your texts. I was going to call, but I haven’t really been up all that long. We stayed out pretty late, so I had to sleep in a little extra this morning.”

“Sounds like you both had a lot to talk about.”

“Yeah. He just knows so much about my line of work, and you know how much I love what I do,” A hint of red tints your cheeks as you chuckle. “We actually had to come back here because I talked up until the coffee shop closed.”

Theodore wanted to laugh at that. He wanted to laugh because he knows first hand how much you can talk when it’s something you’re passionate about. But he doesn’t laugh. All he could hear was, ‘we had to come back here.’

“Here? You mean, your apartment, here? Why, uh, why did he do that?”

“It was only to finish up the conversation. He didn’t stay long,” You brush it off, grabbing Theodore lightly by his collar. “Also, how come I haven’t gotten a good morning kiss?”

He looks slightly torn before ultimately leaning into your touch and pressing your lips together. The kiss is slow and sensual, and he almost, almost, pushes you back into your apartment so he can give you a real good morning. He only decides against it when a thought pops into his head. What if that guy showed you a real good night?

With that thought infecting his brain, he didn’t even notice when you stopped kissing him.

“What is going on with you? You’ve been acting kind of weird since last night.”

“Yeah, I…sorry,” He scratches the back of his head before moving that same hand through his brown locks. “It’s nothing. I guess I’m just tired.”

You raise an eyebrow, not believing him for a second. “You’re my boyfriend, Theo. Don’t you think I can tell when you’re lying to me? C’mon, tell me what’s really going on.”

“I miss Samantha.”

“You—what?” You gaze at him, not really knowing how to respond. Of course, you knew all about Samantha. Just thinking about her, and what she put Theodore through, made your hands shake with anger. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“She was… easier.” 

You scoff, not believing your ears. You manage to keep your voice steady as you drag him into your apartment and shut the door.

“Again, what is that supposed to mean?”

“I never had to worry about her—not like this. In hindsight, I should have been worried. She was seeing more than six hundred people, and yet, the possibility of you seeing one somehow hurts worse.”

“Seeing…who? What are you talking about, baby?” You ask, genuinely confused. Your heart breaks into a million pieces once you see tears well up in Theodore’s beautiful eyes.

“The guy from your work. He was here last night.”

“So? Christ, Theodore. That doesn’t mean I slept with him. Who do you think I am?”

“You didn’t text me back. You told me you would let me know, and you didn’t. The only reason I heard from you at all was because I came by today.”

“I told you I slept in!” You raised your voice.

He matched yours, gesturing wildly. “Because you were out late!”

You groan. “We cannot keep having this same fight. A few weeks ago, you were worried about that bartender and me talking. Except you didn’t even give me a chance to explain to you that he was gay, and currently asking my advice about his relationship with a male. And this week, what? You’re worried that I’m sleeping with my fellow employees?”

He stays silent, looking everywhere but your eyes.

“Theodore, if this is how it’s going to be…we’re not going to make it very far in this relationship. You can’t be scared of me. I’m not Catherine, and I’m not Samantha.”

“You’re better.” He whispers, finally locking eyes with you. “You’re so fucking better, Y/N. I remember telling Samantha that I had experienced all the emotions I was ever going to feel—everything from then on out would be lesser versions of what I’d already felt. But that was so wrong. I have never felt such happiness, such jealousy, such overwhelming love for anyone else. And I am terrified of losing it. Of losing you.”

He pauses as you both wipe the tears that have fallen from your eyes. He gently takes your hands, continuing,

“I’ve never been anyone’s first priority.”

That hits you like a freight train, and you move to embrace him with all the strength left in your body. If there’s anything you want—no, need—in life, it is for Theodore Twombly to know how head over heels in love with him you are. Sure, it’s only been a few months. But you know he won’t mind hearing it this soon. In fact, you know it will probably be the only words that can truly comfort his heartbroken soul.

You tug on his hands that are still latched onto yours, and pull him down into a soft kiss.

“I love you,” You mumble against his lips.

“I love you too,” He gently runs his hands through your hair, before lifting your chin so that you’re eye to eye. “I’m sorry for saying that I miss Samantha. I’m lucky to have you, and that was out of line.”

“It was, but I understand,“ You sigh contently, before smiling at your boyfriend. “I’m sorry for staying out late last night and worrying you. I promise I’ll text next time for sure.”

Theodore nods, deciding it’s probably not the best time to overanalyze the ‘next time’ comment. Instead, he simply smiles at you and leans down to kiss you again. Yeah, he thinks to himself, he’s pretty lucky indeed.

A/N: Request fanfics if you want. Anything Joaquin related.

[connorandersons-blog]

Let’s Give them Something to Talk About, Chapter 4

Rating: Explicit     Word count: 4,328        Ship: RK1000 (Connor/Markus)   Chapter: 4/5

Summary: The Jericho team plus Connor need to think up a way to distract the  public from the fact that North punched a very important human. What  better way than the Deviant Leader dating the Deviant Hunter?  

Thank you to @gavincantreedthis for beta reading this!

---------------------------------

Connor went to work the next day and kept his head down. He did what he had to do and nothing extra.

Hank, Gavin, Tina, and Chris all try to question him, then comfort him but he blocked him all out.

He didn't want to think so he let his programming run him on what was practically autopilot.

He kept doing this for days, blocking all calls from Markus, North, Josh, and Simon. He knew North and the others had tried to come over but Hank always made sure they didn't bother him.

He'd have to make sure he thanked Hank later. He mostly stayed in his room when not at work and only came out to cook for Hank when he felt up for it.

It was over two weeks later when Hank knocked on his door after making Simon leave.

"Come in," he mumbled from his bed. The door slowly opened and Hank poked his head in before coming in and sitting on the bed.

Connor was once again cuddling his red panda and refused to get out of bed since he didn't have work.

Hank looked around the room then back to Connor. "I think you need to talk about this. I've kept the others away, but if they did something to you I can tell they are sorry. Not that you have to accept that, but maybe talking it out would help."

Connor could tell how awkward and uncomfortable this made Hank. He was still getting used to opening up to Connor and acting fatherly again. He never got to this point with Cole and Connor could tell he was thinking of him.

Maybe he owed him this. "Markus and I… we were painting. He painted me then I literally painted him, like on him. I don't know how it got to this but we were talking about fake dating and he," now was the awkward part. How was he supposed to talk about this with Hank?

"Did he confess his feelings for you?" Hank asked after Connor paused for a bit too long.

Connor jolted and shook his head. "No! No, he doesn't feel that way about me. He, ok this is really awkward and embarrassing. Please don't laugh."

Hank reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Kid, I'm a cop, I've seen almost everything."

"Markus slapped my ass and I liked it!" He said fast enough that he doubted Hank could actually understand him.

Hank's eyes went wide and Connor covered his face. Why? Why did he say that? He could have easily said anything else.

Then he heard Hank snort and Connor looked up and glared at him. "Sorry! Kid, you do realize that's really fucking normal right? It's probably the most normal thing out there."

"Normal? Hank, he literally slapped my ass and I went fucking limp! He probably thinks I'm a freak!" Connor said, hiding his face.

Hank dramatically sighed. "Kid, that's normal. He doesn't think you're a freak. From what I've seen he thinks you hate him. Do a quick search of- wow I’m saying this sentence today I guess- BDSM for me."

Connor didn't question it and did as told. It only took him two seconds before he was a blushing mess. "Hank! Why did you tell me to do this?"

"To show that spanking is fucking vanilla. You have nothing to be embarrassed about. If you wanna talk to anyone message fucking Reed," Hank said with a small shrug.

He'd be way too embarrassed to talk to about this currently, but maybe later when he wasn't internally dying. "I don't know. I don't want to make Markus uncomfortable."

"Son, he's the one that slapped your ass. He probably liked it too," Hank deadpanned.

No, there was no way Markus liked that. He was just joking around with Connor, there was nothing else. "No, he didn't."

"Did you give him the chance to tell you that?" Hank questioned, raising an eyebrow. Connor sunk into his bed, shaking his head.

"No." The word was mumbled, of course.

"Well, you're getting your chance today. North said you two need to go on a date tonight. You're going to a club." Hank said, standing up.

Connor sat up so fast he was almost a blur. "What?! Hank, no! I can't- not tonight."

"Oh, you had plans for tonight that don't involve lying in bed? Kid, just talk to him ok? He's coming over in an hour," Hank said before walking back out to the living room.

Connor groaned and slowly pulled himself out of bed. He could do this. He had to do this for North and his people.

He took his time getting ready, pulling out a black, loose, shiny transparent mesh sheer top with long sleeves. He'd never worn it before out of the house, but he thought it would be appropriate for a club. He also grabbed his simple plain distressed skinny ripped jeans that had a chain.

That seemed like a good outfit. He let his hair be curly and he put on eyeliner. Not too shabby.

He dragged his feet when he heard a knock at the door. Hank let him get it and even gave him a thumbs up.

He opened the door to see Markus standing there in a white button-up with short sleeves and jeans. It's probably the tamest outfit he's ever worn. He didn't even have a jacket on. That wasn’t to say he didn't look good, because he definitely did. Connor was just a bit shocked.

They both stared at each other for a bit until Hank cleared his throat. "Right, um I guess we should get going?" Connor said, staring past Markus.

"Of course, I've got a cab for us," Markus said, offering his hand. Connor stared at it for a long second before tentatively taking it.

It felt different than before- more charged. He's more aware of how his hands are, how gently he's holding him. He was lucky his hands can't get sweaty.

Connor got in first and the ride was the most awkward thing he ever had to do. Connor kept trying to talk but nothing felt right, so he always closed his mouth.

Markus seemed to want to talk but also had no idea what to say. It was so much easier talking to Hank, but even then it was like pulling teeth.

The club was busy but too much that it would cause Connor to panic. He may be uneasy near Markus right now but he'd still protect him with his life.

The two stood outside the club and Connor mentally said fuck it. "Markus, we need to talk."

"Of course, I'm so sorry for what I did, it was completely uncalled for and not appropriate at all," Markus said, looking at him with sadness.

"No, I didn't… look, I didn't run because of that. I ran because I was embarrassed that I liked it." He couldn't look at Markus, so he stared at the ground.

He was so ready for Markus to be disgusted. "Oh. That's fine, I don't mind. I honestly did mean to, uh, turn you on, I swear. I promise I'll never do it again unless you want me to."

He was not expecting that. "Wait, you're not disgusted?" He looked up at him, furrowing his brows.

"What? No, of course not! Connor, that's completely natural. I'm just sorry I did that without asking, this is on me," Markus said, reaching out.

This time Connor eagerly took his hand. "I don't blame you at all. I just thought I'd make you uncomfortable." This was far easier and going way smoother than he thought it would.

Instead of answering Markus pulled him into a hug, pressing their bodies together so close there's not even air between them. "You could never do that. I'm sorry I made you think that."

Connor slowly pulled back, fully smiling for the first time in a bit. "It's ok. Alright, we should probably get in there. I'm guessing we're just gonna let whoever is there take pictures instead of any reporters."

"Yep, everyone agreed that it would spread faster this way. We do have to dance together a bit, is that ok? And don't worry about your body's reaction, ok? We're gonna be in the same boat with that." Markus started tugging him towards the door.

In the club, the good vibes flowed like a virus, but a good one. There was excitement in the air, all hyped up and ready to give them a good time. The music was loud to the point where humans probably couldn't hear each other, but Markus and Connor would be able to hear each other.

They turned heads when people noticed but most were too lost in the music and their dance partners. Connor kept hold of Markus as they pushed their way to the bar. They'd both need a second to get used to the club before they'd dance.

The bar was filled with people to the point where Markus and himself had to squeeze in to get to the bar.

The bartender is a younger woman with walnut skin, short grey hair, and brown eyes. She also had tattoos up and down each arm and Connor would bet more were hidden under her clothes. She moved around the bar with practiced ease, making and pouring drinks without even looking.

She walked up to them with a grin, hiding her surprise at the sight of them. "Boys, what can I get for you?"

"I'll have the El Presidente please," Connor yelled over the music. She nods and looks to Markus.

"And you hun?" She yelled, already pulling out what Connor's drink would need.

e"A Mojito please," Markus yelled back. Connor hadn't been expecting him to order that.

The two stood there, taking in the club. The lights moved around the room, blinding Connor momentarily. "Have you ever been to a club before?" Connor asked, leaning close to Markus so they wouldn't feel the need to yell.

Markus put an arm around Connor and nodded. "I have. We all went out one night and it was fun. North even got me to activate my intoxication settings so I made a total fool of myself."

Markus and Connor both took their drinks and sipped at them. She really knew what she was doing. Neither could get drunk from alcohol but they both had the modulator to be drunk.

Connor had never used his, but he didn't think now would be a good time either. Maybe one day they'd go out again and he'd try it out, just to see. "I haven't, hopefully, I don't do this wrong."

He made sure to take in the different dance styles. Most didn't even seem to have a pattern, but they all seemed to move to the music. Hopefully, he'd be able to accurately recreate the same.

"You'll do fine. We'll start off slow, don't worry." Markus said, finishing off his drink.

Connor followed suit, putting the glass back into the bar. Markus grabbed his hand and pulled him into the crowd on the dance floor.

They faced each other and were pushed together by people bumping into them. The feeling of the bass vibrated in their chests and Connor wasn't sure how he felt about it.

Markus held his hands and pulled him around, trying to loosen him up. Connor moved slightly at first, unsure of himself. The more he relaxed the easier it was, and soon he was loose and happy, moving with Markus and the beat.

In the dark of the club, all he had seen was Markus's high cheekbones and mischievous eyes. He danced like no-one was watching, but of course, they all were, anyone would want to watch Markus. But Markus's gaze was purely on Connor with a grin on his lips.

Connor got a burst of confidence and turned around and pushed back against Markus. Markus gasped but only loud enough that Connor could hear, and he couldn't help but smirk.

He was the one Markus was focused on, and he was the one making Markus gasp. There was a certain thrill to that but Connor didn't know why. Was it because Markus was gorgeous, kind, brave, and so many other adjectives? Or was it because of what Markus had become?

He didn't think it was the latter, but he honestly couldn't care at this point. He let his body move to the music and Markus held him tightly by the hips. The music moved them like they are puppets on strings.

He rolled his hips and Markus's grip on his hips tightened, but he's moving in time with Connor too. "Fuck, Connor," Markus mumbled in his ear.

Connor chuckled and kept moving, not holding back. Markus cursed softly in his ear every now and then and it only encouraged him more. He was actually having fun with this.

"Connor, fuck you're amazing. So beautiful." Markus groaned, and Connor could feel exactly what he's doing to him.

He whined at the compliments, trying to breathe deeply to cool himself down.

Markus heard the whine, of course, and grinned to himself. "Beautiful. You move so well, and all for me. Everyone is looking at us with jealousy." Markus pressed a kiss to his neck and Connor's knees went weak.

Connor quickly turned and presses their lips together. They'd need to do this anyway, but it also felt like the string that had been so tight but the kiss snapped it.

It was fast and messy, and Connor didn't give a fuck about the people who were gasping and taking pictures. It made Connor's pump pound and he kept trying to pull Markus closer and closer.

Connor made a frustrated moan when his brain decided to tell him the chemical makeup of Markus and his drink.

Markus brought a hand up and gently gripped the back of his hair. Connor groaned and tilted his head to the side and Markus practically attacked his neck.

He let out another gasp and rolled his hips forward again, and Markus bit down enough to make the skin around Markus's lips pull away.

A few people were now giving them dirty looks for taking up space and going farther than acceptable. There were also the people who were staring and getting a bit too into it, but the pictures didn't stop.

Markus pulled away and grinned at Connor before dragging him through the crowd. After a moment of confusion, Connor was roughly pushed against the wall and Markus was back to kissing Connor's lips.

Markus's knee was between Connor's leg and Connor was practically humping him, panting into the kiss.

Markus nipped at his bottom lip and pulled at Connor's hair while the other was up and under his shirt.

Connor moaned when Markus tugged on his hair and Markus smirked. "Look at you... Fuck, Connor."

"Markus! Don't stop, please," he begged and Markus was glad to comply.

They were definitely putting on a good show and multiple people had taken shaky videos.

Markus brushed his finger over Connor's nipple and he jerked and yelped, eyes going wide. "Fuck," Connor whined.

Markus smirked and did it again, loving the reaction he got out of him. "Is this ok?" Markus asked as he moved the hand away from Connor's hair to grab his ass.

Connor nodded and panted, "Yes, yes please." Part of Connor was aware this was all for show, but he still enjoyed it. He still wanted Markus to kiss him until he could no longer think.

"Good boy, saying please," Markus mumbled soft enough that even Connor could barely hear him.

Connor's knees went weak and the only thing keeping him up was Markus. Neither of them really expected him to react that dramatically and Markus chuckled as he kissed his way down Connor's neck.

"Fuck, we should probably stop soon." Connor breathed out. He wouldn't be able to last long and they definitely made enough of a scene.

Markus pulled back and searched Connor's face. "We could… do you want to continue this somewhere more private?"

Connor tilted his head slightly. "Why? No one would be able to see us then."

Markus swallowed and moved back away with a frown. "Right, that's true. Ok, I'll get us another drink."

Connor didn't know why Markus was so upset, but he didn't question it. He needed a second to compose himself and calm down. Markus nodded and pushed his way to the bar while Connor leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes.

He tried to block out everything else around him, but his lips still tingled and it felt like he was floating.

The music was still just as loud but he felt like everything was muffled. He had literally just made out with Markus. The man who set all of his people free, but more importantly, his best friend.

It felt very nice and honestly, he didn't want it to stop. He just didn't want to go too far. He only just now was able to face Markus again. At least this time he could feel that Markus was just as affected.

He had been momentarily curious as to if Markus was equipped with genitals, but it was mostly just wanting to know. He wasn't too surprised, all prototype models were equipped with everything they could be. If they weren't actually needed then they'd be removed before another test was sent out.

He just wasn't sure since Markus was specifically made for Carl and not made to eventually be released to the public.

Connor jumped when he felt a hand in his shoulder, but was happy to see it was just Markus with his drink.

He gladly took it and chugged most of it, checking the time. He almost spat his drink out when he saw they've been there for three hours.

Most of it was dancing but they must have been kissing for at least an hour. That was far longer than he thought, it only felt like a few minutes at that.

"Do you want to dance some more?" Connor asked, pushing off the wall. He was much calmer now, and he actually enjoyed dancing quite a lot.

Markus shrugged and sipped at his drink. "We can if you want, but if we make out again we might get a drink thrown on us."

Worth it, his brain supplied but he shook his head at himself. "We can just dance, I won't um… do that again if you don't want."

"It's fine, dance however you want sunflower." And there's the pet name again that made Connor flush and smile.

Connor and Markus finished their drinks before going back out on the dance floor. They goofed off a bit, waving their arms around and laughing at each other when one of them would do something particularly stupid.

They got a few people around them to do the same and soon half of the dance floor turned into wild dancing that didn't go with the music at all. Connor chalked it up to Markus's neverending charisma.

That didn't last long as most people went back to dancing regularly or off to the bar to get a drink and cool down.

A few of the androids had walked up to them and thanked both Markus and Connor for freeing them. A few even hoped them happiness with their relationship.

Markus had put an arm around Connor and pressed a kiss to his cheek, throwing out that he was the lucky one instead of Connor. Each time he gave a compliment freely or hushed about him Connor would flush and duck his head.

It was hard to believe he'd ever have something like this with anyone. He just couldn't see anyone actually wanting this with him. He was so inexperienced and he had done so much in his past. He doubted even a human would want to be with him.

Yet Markus said each compliment with a smile and tone of voice that begged someone to try and tell him otherwise. If Connor didn't know better Connor would have believed him.

The way he looked at him made his pulse race and he couldn't help but look back. How was Markus so good at this? How could he pretend so well that he was even fooling Connor into thinking Markus's feelings may be real.

He couldn't stop thinking about it even as Markus kissed him goodbye and he made his way back home. He couldn't stop thinking about it as he laid in bed and stared up at the ceiling.

He finally let all of his messages come in just to try and distract himself. All the messages from North, Josh, Simon, and Markus flood in and it takes him a second before he's able to sort through them all.

All of Markus's messages were mostly apologies and explanations up until that night when he had tried to explain the date.

He read through each message and sent them each a message apologizing for his behavior and that he had overreacted. They all replied instantly saying he hadn't needed to apologize.

Then his thoughts were back to Markus. He couldn't stop going over everything they'd done together. His mind kept saying it was real, but Connor knew it wasn't. It couldn't be.

He had to find evidence that it was fake. Every time they kissed it was for the cause… Actually no, that isn't right. They had kissed just to do so before.

That's fine, there had to be more. Markus was naturally touchy so it wasn't too odd that he was more so with Connor during this. If anyone would have walked in on them it would have looked like they were together.

Markus would jokingly call him his boyfriend even in private. He was joking, right? He had to be, but he couldn't tell his tone over messages.

There was so much evidence that said otherwise but it had to be. Markus couldn't like him, it just wasn't possible.

»From Connor

I know this is sudden, but do you think I'm loveable?

»From Gavin

wtf? yeh definitely, why?

»From Connor

I think Markus may like me.

»From Gavin

uh… the dude is your boyfriend, i sure hope he doee

*Does

Shit, right Gavin didn't know. Well, he could trust him with this. He just had to talk to someone who wasn't like a father to him.

»From Connor

The relationship isn't real. We were using it to distract the public from what North had done.

»From Gavin

well shit man, yeah youre totally loveable. if markus doesnt like you even a little hes an idiot

Connor grinned at the message and shook his head. Gavin could be so overly dramatic.

»From Connor

I highly doubt that. I also highly doubt Markus likes me, but all the evidence points that way.

»From Gavin

dude wtf? is this gonna be the whole am i adorable thing? i swear ill call the whole city and id bet if they met you they had a small crush at some point

»From Connor

This isn't the same. It's one thing to be attractive, but it's another to be loveable. I've done too much to warrant this.

»From Gavin

just so you know, i face palmed. I literally pulled a gun on you multiple times and you forgave me. what makes you so different that your arent forgivable (not saying you need to be forgiven but you sure think you do)

»From Connor

That's different, you've changed and even apologized. I was just a machine back then, so I don't blame you.

»From Gavin

face palmed again. YOU WERE A MACHINE, dude you literally said that yourself. you weren't in full control, no one blames you

Connor stared at the message before closing his eyes and taking a deep breath.

Gavin was right. It would always feel like it was his fault, maybe he could have deviated sooner. The blame couldn't be put entirely onto him.

That didn't mean he was loveable, or even likable by someone like Markus. How was this even possible?

It made sense with how Markus had acted but still. Why was he so against the idea of someone liking him?

»From Connor

I blame myself. I just don't see how someone, especially an android, could like me.

»From Gavin

god damn my forehead is getting tired. and red as fuck. look you may not see it, but you are loveable. basically all humans are. did you know theres people that'll fall in love with convicted serial killers? if they can be loved so can you

»From Connor

I will try to believe that. Thank you, Gavin

»From Gavin

whatever tincan. see you at work

Connor snorted at the nickname and grinned up at his ceiling. Gavin was crude, but right, even appealing to his statistics that he could be correct. That maybe he could be loveable. If so, then he'd have to admit that Markus at least found him attractive.

Well, that was definitely a given after what had happened that night. It was clear Connor was also attractive to Markus but how much?

Was it deeper than just a crush? The thought made him shiver and he had to physically shake his head. No, he couldn't love Markus.

Even if Markus loved him it wouldn't be fair. It would be too easy to use Connor against him. Whatever was left of his programming could possibly be used against him and he'd never let that happen. He'd never let him get that close.

He'd see this through, though. He'd follow along and he wouldn't let himself get too deep.

After he'd let Markus down gently and they'd go back to being friends. He'd also make sure to not get too close that way too.

He will keep Markus safe.

[rk1kheadcanons]

A headcanon for Connor wholeheartedly captaining the Simarcus or Normarcus ship b/c he’s dying and he just wants the love of his life happy before he goes? (He’s already dealing with telling his dad Hank that he’s about to lose another son, he doesn’t want to also leave a lover behind)

First of all, OW my heart, okay?😭

Trigger warnings for dying or dying lover. Be safe, guys!

I'll admit that I have a tiny head cannon that I occasionally pick up and dust off that Connor was made not to last because he was a transient prototype.

That plays directly into this here prompt. Connor realizes something is wrong. Glaring errors, slowing runtimes regardless of rest mode, and slowing responses.

One trip to Kamski that Hank was sworn to secrecy about confirms it: he's dying and there's no fix for this shy of completely transferring his whole, entire being into a compatible mented unit, say like the RK900, had it met the light of day after the revolution. Hank takes it hard. Its to be expected. They'd grown past being just begrudging co-workers, to friends, to well, Hank was his father figure of sorts, leaving the man with another dying son.

Connor confided in Simon first. Simon pulled him into a hug and cried for him when Connor couldn't, not yet. Josh was next, his defeated face eched into Connor's memory. Josh had taken it like a personal loss, for Connor life, and for his best fruend's, Markus. That left North. North was all her old fiery fury and sadness and he was flattered it was for him. And she held him close and just promised things he knew wouldn't happen for him.

Then there was Markus.

Dear, loving, supportive, emotional Markus. He didn't want to leave him. This was beyond unfair. Connor had just began to feel real, like he was alive, and now soon he wouldn't be.

When he finally told Markus, the other man stopped. He stopped. Stopped breathing, moving. It was if time had just frozen him. It had been weeks and Connor had gotten worse. He tried to interface with the energy he had. It was accepted but the scope of what Connor had told him was shown bare to him: Markus was devastated. His heart was figuratively broken. He'd stopped because on the outside because he had three different protocols vying to act: scream, cry all the tears he knew that would never stop, and literally run until until his body fell apart.

His system had hung up.

Connor hated this. He hated it was him to cause these feelings in Markus. He thought to offer up Simon or North when he was gone and was met with such a whiplash of anger, hed almost disconnected the interface.

Markus simply said "Never discount your importance to me. You're my only love for my lifetime. I'll love you and only you until either of us cease to be. Until such a time we meet again, and I have full faith we will, I will mourn and only live for you alone."

Sorry again this was so long. May fool around and make something out of this. THANK you for the prompt

[lunanight2012]

A Whole New World Prelude Pt 3

Key:

E/C = eye color

H/C = hair color

H/L= hair length

S/C = skin color

Y/N = your name

L/N = last name

N/N = nickname

(Two hours later)

I screamed, {E/C} eyes shooting open and quickly sitting upright. Not prepared, I smacked my head into something equally as hard.

"Ow! What happened?" I asked, rubbing my head. 

"Ye bloody passed out on us two hours ago. I got ye stitched up." Harry explained, startling me. Opening my eyes, once more, I saw Harry pressing his palm to his own forehead, wincing as he did so. “Why is yer head so ‘ard!!” he hissed, glaring at me between his fingers.

"S-sorry!" I exclaimed, backing up.

I stopped when I accidentally knocked over a photo frame. I froze, catching the frame before it could fall. Lifting it up, I turned to look at it. A family photo it would seem.

Is that his dad? Wow he doesn't look like the Captain Hook I remember. His mom seems very pretty, and nice. But wait, how was this picture taken?

"Is this your family?"

"Ye. Now if ye don't mind." Harry took the photo out of my hands before I could even say anything else.

I blinked. "You have sisters?" I blurted out.

"Ye, now shut yer mouth and come on. School's out now and Uma wants us on the Lost Revenge." Harry stated, grabbing my wrist and pulling me off the bed.

~~~At The Lost Revenge~~~~~

I froze as soon as we got on the ship. Everyone was looking at me. I tried hiding behind Harry. Wincing in pain as I released my grip on Harry's jacket. 

'It's gunna be ok. It's gunna be alright.' I repeated in my head.

"{Y/N}? {Y/N}!" Uma yelled snapping me out of my thoughts.

I peeked out from behind Harry to see Uma glaring at me. 

"Were you listening?" She almost growled at me, I shook my head.

She rolled her eyes. "Well then you're going to pretend you know how to handle a damn sword. Come on crew! Let's prepare to face those worthless brats!" Uma exclaimed.

The crew cheered, holding up their swords. Harry took a spare sword from one of the crew and took my {dominant} hand and placed the sword handle there. Of course I still winced from the pain. 

Harry walked me over to a part of the deck and instructed me to stay put and to look mean. As soon as he walked away I looked up at the sky and noticed a small crack in the sky. 

'Huh? Wait, is that the barrier they were talking about?' I thought to myself, not even realizing that around the pupils in my eyes were thin rings of gold. Barely noticeable. 

"Oh Shrimpy~! What have you got there? That new girl shouldn't even be here!" An all too familiar voice boomed from the docks.

I shivered and gripped the sword handle tighter.

Mal and her gang. 

My hands started to shake. A memory of my past flashed through my mind.

My mother screaming at me when she found me in the backyard in the rain. But what she was screaming at me about was that the rain didn't touch me. It was pouring yet I was completely dry. I knew I had an affinity with water. But with this damn barrier I'm just getting nothing. Maybe it was just in my world. Maybe I'm just a freak..

Suddenly a knife came flying towards me. On some miracle of reflex I swung the sword and reflected it. I looked up and saw a boy… What did Harry say his name was.. Jack? No…. Josh? No….. Jay! That's his name.

Jay was Jafar's son. Hmmm cute but not my type. Suddenly I was sword fighting Jay. And I had never fought with a sword before…. Wait have I? Maybe as a small child.

"What's your name, new girl?" Jay asked me, snapping me out of my daydream.

"I don't have to tell you!" I replied, smirking.

Jay smirked as he continued to sword fight with me, slowly pushing me towards the edge of the ship. Shit. If he keeps at this I'm going to fall in. And yea, I never learned how to swim.

I'm unsure if he could see the slight fear in my eyes or he just thought he had the upper hand. But all of a sudden Jay got up close to me, wrapping an arm around my waist. He then whispered in my ear.

"We could use someone like you on our side. Consider this our offer~!" Jay smirked, a very quick peck to my cheek before he let me go.

I was too out of it. Didn't realize I was falling till i hit the ocean head first. Unprepared, I started drowning. Struggling under the water, my eyes were getting heavy. All I could think was, 'Why don't my powers work?????'

As my vision started fading the last thing I saw was a figure, then darkness.

~~~~~~~~~~~

"{Y/N}? {Y/N}???" I could hear my name but it was so far away.

Air? I could feel air entering my lungs. 

My eyes shot open and I quickly sat up, coughing up water.

"Oh good ye're alright! I'm gunna kill tha' bastard!" Harry exclaimed.

I looked up after coughing up all the water that was in my lungs. Harry was sitting on the beach, drenched, smudged eyeliner. And oh my god, my face was definitely heating up, mostly because Harry looked absolutely hot. Shit.

I sneezed. Shivering from having just been in the ocean. Harry sighed and stood up. Holding out a hand to me.

“Come on. We gotta go get ye dried off so ye don’t catch a cold.” Harry stated.

I grabbed his hand and with his help got up on my feet.

My {H/L} {H/C} hair was soaking wet. My clothes were soaked. My nose is starting to burn from the salty ocean water. I looked at Harry, hugging myself.

“L-Let’s g-go. I’m f-f-freezing!” I exclaimed in a shivering stutter.

Harry smirked, grabbing my hand in his. “Come on, {Y/N}. Let’s go back to my place, well I guess since ye’ll be stayin with meh it’s “our” place. But anyways come on.” Harry rambled on, pulling me to follow him.

Once we got to the apartment Harry had me go into the run down bathroom while he looked for some clothes for me to wear. I stood in the small bathroom, examining my surroundings. There wasn’t much. An old sink, a toilet that somehow manages to work, and a shower that looks like it could use some scrubbing down. I was startled when Harry opened the bathroom door and threw some clothes at me.

“There ye go. They were meh older sister’s clothes. They should fit. Ye can dry off with that towel in tha’ corner.” Harry stated.

I looked over at him and noticed his eyes were closed. At least he’s a gentleman. He closed the door, leaving me in the bathroom alone. I blinked, feeling my face heat up again. Was it just the thought of him seeing me? I shook my head. No. He’s only helping me because Uma would get mad at him if her newest recruit was sick. Also, is there medicine on this island? I have a feeling there isn’t.

I quickly dried off and got changed. {If your H/L is medium/long, then: I put my hair in a high ponytail.} I took a deep breath and opening the door. Harry was in the small kitchen area, though all it had was a retro styled rundown fridge and a sink. 

“T-Thanks for lending me your sister’s clothes.” I smiled.

Harry waved the back of his hand at me as he was at the kitchen sink. Was he hand washing dishes? 

I looked around the house. Messy, small, kind of reminded me of those studio apartments back home. This was definitely bigger than the apartment I had. But this one is definitely messier. Can’t complain though. I guess this is what my life is gunna be now. Hmm. 

“{Y/N}? Ye there? We need ta go. Uma’s gunna want us at the shop.” Harry explained, now standing at the front door, hook in hand.

How long has it been now? I walked over to him and we walked outside, and towards the Chip Shop. I looked up at the cloudy sky. Hmm. Has it really been an hour and a half already? Wow. 

“Ye alright lass?” Harry asked, raising his eyebrow in confusion.

“I’m alright, the day is just going by very fast that’s all. And…. I’m just thinking about the fight on the ship.” I responded, rubbing my left wrist with my right hand.

Harry continued with his confused look. “What do ya mean by that?” 

“Well. So um. Back in my world I had a small affinity for water. But here I can’t even make the water do what I want even a little. So I’m just bothered by that.” I explained as we walked through the market. 

I watched Harry steal a slightly rotten piece of fruit from a stall. Understanding now that this is not a place where good things happen. It feels like they get the leftovers from the mainland. I looked around as we got closer to the Chip Shop. 

This was just the beginning of my life here in this new world. What happens next? Well just wait and see? ;-)

That’s it for the Prelude! Just to let you all know that each chapter is gunna be 3 parts each. And oh boy is Chapter 1 gunna be exciting! Hope you all enjoy!

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