#although if were being 100% serious i did find the page thing silly at first cause i was expecting it to be just peace terms

[tweedstoat]

It was Alicent's idea to use the page to manipulate Rhaenira. she a cunning woman remember that .

[introvertguide]

Chinatown (1974); AFI #21

The next movie that we reviewed was a very dark example of neo-noir film directed by Roman Polanski, Chinatown (1974). This film was a throwback to very dark crime thrillers that reflected the outlook of a Great Depression followed by world war. Polanski was experiencing a very dark period since he had just moved to America to get married and immediately lost his wife and unborn son in a horrific murder. The film was well received by critics and audiences, but it could not stand against the award winning juggernaut which was The Godfather Part 2. Polanski’s film was nominated for 11 Academy awards but only took one home for best original screenplay, a category that didn’t include The Godfather Part 2. It is hard to describe how incredibly down beat this film is without spoiling too early, so let me give the breakdown with the standard warning:

SPOILER ALERT!!! THIS IS A MURDER MYSTERY SO THE PLOT IS ABOUT TO BE WELL SPOILED!!! IF YOU WANT TO SEE THE FILM FIRST, NOW IS THE TIME TO STEP AWAY!!! COME BACK AFTER YOU SEE THE FILM!!!

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In 1937, a woman identifying herself as Evelyn Mulwray hires private investigator J. J. "Jake" Gittes (Jack Nicholson) to follow her husband, Hollis Mulwray, the chief engineer at the Los Angeles Department of Water and Power. Gittes tails him, hears him publicly refuse to create a new reservoir that would be unsafe, and shoots photographs of him with a young woman, which are published on the front page of the following day's paper. Back at his office, Gittes is confronted by a woman who informs him she is the real Evelyn Mulwray (Faye Dunaway) and that he can expect a lawsuit.

Realizing he was set up, Gittes assumes that Hollis Mulwray is the real target. Before he can question him, Lieutenant Lou Escobar fishes Mr. Mulwray, drowned, from a reservoir. Under retainer to Mrs. Mulwray, Gittes investigates with suspicions of murder and notices that although there is a drought, huge quantities of water are being released from the reservoir every night. Gittes is warned off by Water Department Security Chief Claude Mulvihill and a henchman (Roman Polanski) who slashes one of Gittes' nostrils. Back at his office, Gittes receives a call from Ida Sessions, who identifies herself as the imposter Mrs. Mulwray. She is afraid to identify her employer but tells Gittes to check the day's obituaries.

Gittes learns that Mulwray was once the business partner of Evelyn's wealthy father, Noah Cross (John Huston). Over lunch at his personal club, Cross warns Gittes that he does not understand the forces at work, and offers to double Gittes' fee to search for Mulwray's missing mistress. At the hall of records, Gittes discovers that much of the Northwest Valley has recently changed ownership. Investigating the valley, he is attacked by angry landowners who believe he is an agent of the water department attempting to force them out by sabotaging their water supply.

Gittes deduces that the water department is drying up the land so it can be bought at a reduced price and that Mulwray was murdered when he discovered the plan. He discovers that a recently deceased retirement home resident is one of the valley's new landowners and seemingly purchased the property a week after his death. Gittes and Evelyn bluff their way into the home and confirm that the real-estate deals were surreptitiously completed in the names of several of the home's residents. Their visit is interrupted by the suspicious retirement-home director, who has called Mulvihill.

After fleeing Mulvihill and his thugs, Gittes and Evelyn hide at Evelyn's house and sleep together. During the night, Evelyn gets a phone call and must leave suddenly; she warns Gittes that her father is dangerous. Gittes follows Evelyn's car to a house, where he spies her through the windows comforting Mulwray's mistress, Katherine. He accuses Evelyn of holding the woman against her will, but she says Katherine is her sister.

The next day, an anonymous call draws Gittes to Ida Sessions' apartment, where he finds her murdered and Escobar waiting for Gittes' arrival. Escobar tells him the coroner's report found salt water in Mulwray's lungs, indicating that he did not drown in the fresh water of the reservoir. Escobar suspects Evelyn of the murder and tells Gittes to produce her quickly. At Evelyn's mansion, Gittes finds her servants packing her things. He realizes her garden pond is salt water and discovers a pair of bifocals in it. He confronts Evelyn about Katherine, whom Evelyn now claims is her daughter. After Gittes slaps her (a lot), she tells him that Katherine is her sister and her daughter; her father raped her when she was 15. She says that the glasses are not Mulwray's, as he did not wear bifocals.

Gittes arranges for the women to flee to Mexico and instructs Evelyn to meet him at her butler's home in Chinatown. He summons Cross to the Mulwray home to settle their deal. Cross admits his intention to annex the Northwest Valley into the City of Los Angeles, then irrigate and develop it. Gittes accuses Cross of murdering Mulwray. Cross has Mulvihill take the bifocals at gunpoint, and they force Gittes to drive them to the women. When they reach the Chinatown address, the police are already there and detain Gittes. When Cross approaches Katherine, Evelyn shoots him in the arm and starts to drive away with Katherine. The police open fire, killing Evelyn. Cross clutches Katherine and leads her away, while Escobar orders Gittes released. Lawrence Walsh, one of Gittes' associates, tells him: "Forget it, Jake. It's Chinatown."

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I really cannot emphasize how much of a bummer ending this film has. It is right up there (down there) with Sophie’s Choice. A man who pays to dump water so that he can purchase cheap farm land, kills his partner who threatens to tell, and rapes his own 15-year-old daughter is the antagonist. In the end, he is released to take custody of his young granddaughter without punishment after the police shoot the daughter that he raped. The investigator who tried to help and solved the mystery is left with no say and a slit nostril for his troubles. Polanski later said in interviews that he wanted to emphasize the futility of trying to find justice in Los Angeles. Both his life and this movie really proved that as a fact. It is funny that the screenwriter who won the academy award wanted Cross to die and Evelyn to live, but Polanski insisted and the dark tone is what pushed the award in their favor.

There was some discussion about finding an actor that was willing to be the lead with a bandaged face or prosthetic injury for most of the movie. It was still all about face time and dialogue, so most lead actors didn’t want to cover up their face. Nicholson was not actually known for his good looks as much as other actors, so he was more willing to take on the role. Actually, it was Nicholson who wanted to work on a project with Polanski and suggested the script in the first place. Also, Nicholson really connected with Polanski at the time and was not afraid to play dark roles. Jon Huston was not as keen on the heavy pedophile incest role since he had a lovely young daughter of his own (actress Angelica Huston). It turned out to be a good choice for all the actors involved.

Something that came up during the viewing with my housemates was reactions to the scene when Jack Nicholson is slapping Faye Dunaway when she is admitting that the girl she visits is both her sister and her daughter. She keeps alternating between “she’s my sister” and “she’s my daughter” and each statement is punctuated with a slap in the face by Jack Nicholson. It is supposed to be deeply serious and a major reveal in the movie, but we were laughing so hard at the absurdity. It was truly unrealistic and more of a trope of film noir than anything else (slapping a hysterical woman). It truly was a throwback to 40s and 50s style Hollywood and some of the standards of film story telling at that time were a bit silly. 

I have reviewed this move in more ways than I thought because I realized on this viewing that the video game L.A. Noir borrows very heavily from this film. So many aspects, from the locations to the situations to the soundtrack, were all put into the video game. I have spent many hours of my life playing through that game a number of times and I am shocked each time. I am curious if Rockstar Games had to pay any money to Roman Polanski for such a close similarity to the film? I tried to look it up but didn’t find anything, so probably not. 

So should this film by on the AFI to 100? For sure. It is an Old Hollywood story about even older Hollywood. It stands out as one of the darkest endings that I have ever experienced. It has major star power and surrounded by amazing stories of Hollywood. Would I recommend it? I sure would. It is a great trip around old Hollywood with some of America’s greatest actors. I think just as interesting is the story of Roman Polanski (who I did an article on as well) and why his head space was so dark during the production of this film. Definitely worth a watch and a background deep dive.

[parkeraul]

anatomy | oneshot

a/n: i don’t know what it is but i had this stuck in my phone’s notes and i’m going to give it a try lol. i got inspired by a post here on tumblr and another one on twitter (both different, both NOT what you’re thinking they are) and this is like... nerdy!shawn? college!shawn? student!shawn? idk read it to find it out. plus, this is a work of fiction, so the situations named in here aren’t exactly what happens in real life, my dudes. i don’t know if this is how it happens, i’m assuming stuff just to give them an atmosphere. all built up for shawn and reader’s relationship to go somewhere on this imagine. sorry in advance to any medical students lmao.

shawn x reader  warnings: cursing, smut (?).  words: 7.272

It’s nearly 10pm in a saturday when he knocks on her door with his free hand, holding his book in his other hand kind of nervously. She tiptoes downstairs, quickly knotting the strap around her robe to cover her recent showered body. Her mind goes confused, wondering who might be standing outside at this time. Peeking through the magic eye, she can barely recognise the tall figure standing in front of her door with what she figured out as a backpack hanging on his back and something under his tattooed arm. She wasn’t expecting anyone from college because the finals were still happening and she finally managed to get home after passing hers, so everyone else should probably be stuck in their houses half studying, half praying. When she saw his hand coming up to curl in a fist next to the wooden material, she flicked the keys to the side and made sure to hold the upper part of her robe, pulling the edges together to cover her breasts and collarbone.  Opening the door, she meets him wearing a desperate expression on his flushed face. He sighs in relief before putting his shit together. “Shawn? What are you doing here?” She asks smiling insecurely, he doesn’t follow her though. “Thank God you’re home!” He vents and exhales heavily. “I know this is super weird and random, but I honestly don’t know who else to look for. I’m really sorry. God... I shouldn’t-“ “Spit it out, Mendes!” She giggles, opening the door a little bit more to show him somehow that she’s welcoming him. “You know you can count on me to something more than just having my veins available for you to train your blood-removal skills.” She winks and he smiles shyly, remembering how insecure he felt when first asking her to volunteer and be his pair to this class in specific.  

They’ve become pretty close, always getting paired for the classes because they knew that they were responsible and worked greatly together – always hitting high grades even in the most difficult subjects. Medical school is hard already, so they’ve found in each other an easier way to go through it all by supporting each other since their class is filled with so many selfish people. Shawn and Y/N were rarely hanging out when not in college – but more than friends, they are also something like partners in crime.  Although he had a very serious crush on her at first sight, he kept on doing his best to get rid of the feeling eventually, even though he knows he’s not 100% there, he thinks that he’s seen everything he could and his rational side is working constantly to make him get used to live next to her like a normal person would do (seeing her as a nice classmate who’s there for him, not someone who he wants to trace every single inch and experience his daydreams with). She finds him attractive, she can’t even lie. But she would never make a move considering how reserved he is, fearing that he might reject her right at first and never look at her face again. Things couldn’t get this awkward. 

Y/N opens some space for Shawn to step inside her living room and gives him a gentle smile, always reassuring him wordlessly that he can feel comfortable in her presence to ask whatever he wanted to ask – she felt more than glad to solve his doubts, actually. 

“I’m sorry for showing up so late and...” He finally sees that she’s wearing nothing but a black cotton robe and her hair is wet, clinging to her back. “Well, s-sorry for interrupting your s-shower, I-“ Shawn facepalms and rubs his forehead, trying to brush his nervousness off and find the right words to say. He doesn’t want to look like a creep. “Mendes, you’re rambling,” She warns him and closes the door, grabbing his stuff for him to have free hands to take off his coat and shoes. Knowing it, Shawn rapidly does it all before putting both hands together to wait for further instructions. “Stop apologising! You know I don’t care about it.”  Shawn knows that Y/N doesn’t really give a shit about things that some other people would do. She always says that a body is a body: it’s not an object and that a body and sex should be seen as something natural, not something who demands silly and unnecessary jokes when you look at it. And considering the partnership they’ve been developing, she felt more comfortable to talk to him about these things without stuttering or feeling embarassed. If they wanted to build a professional career, they had to deal with bodies normally. 

Maybe this is one of the reasons why they’ve never sat down to spill the tea about their secret little crushes. Shawn is a gentleman, of course, and that’s what keeps him fighting his willing to love on her like he never did with anyone else. He is misunderstanding her words, perhaps. She always talked to him about how much she hates when their classmates started joking and sexualizing human bodies like they were made for nothing more than sex. But that didn’t mean that she’s not into finding out how their touches can melt delightfully, because that’s been currently taking over her imaginations more often than she’d like it to – debating with her own mind how wrong is this, how awful it is of her to imagine Shawn maping her body with those intentions that she wishes her whole class could stop feeding. Maybe she had forgotten to say that, if they’re both agreeing on doing this, if their feelings are matching, then it’d be a whole another story (that she’d love to live intensely, thank you very much). This is such a hot mess.

She trails her way to the kitchen and he follows her before he can miss the sight of her. She points to the big island in the middle of her kitchen for him to sit as she places his book and backpack on top of it. “What’s going on, Shawnie Boy?” She asks while opening her fridge to look for something to eat to offer him. “Thank you for being way too nice, Y/N,” He chuckles to himself, also thanking the universe for crossing their ways. “I couldn’t pass Sally’s latest test and she’s going to eat me alive if I fuck up with the upcoming final exam.” Y/N grabs a box of grape juice to put on top of the island along with some Doritos she found on her cabinet. She thought he might probably want to sink down in unhealthy garbage to calm his damn nerves. “Sally is really unpredictable, isn’t she?” Y/N jokes and also grabs what’s left of her chocolate cake inside the oven to join the other stuff. “What was it about?”  “Anatomy,” Shawn says unpleasantly, grabbing the glass that Y/N is giving him so he can pour some juice to himself. “Women’s body kind of anatomy, more specifically. It makes me wanna give up on this damn class.” He opens the box and starts filling his glass with the deep purple liquid. “You actually can’t. This subject is... How do they say? Obligatory.” She says, staring at him and finishing setting the island with tiny plates and forks. “See? I know I should be studying music or whatever doesn’t envolve vulvas and labias.” His tone expresses all of his disappointment. Shawn hates to fail and also hates the whole process of learning from his mistakes. He never allowed himself to fuck it up even though he had no previous knowledge to execute something perfectly for the first time. “Keep thinking like that and you’ll end up seeing your own hand for the rest of your life.” Y/N is effortlessly pushing him over the edge of his stress, but he knew she was only playing around so he pretended not to care that much. He thought of replying her as boldly as she’s doing, but when she leaned forwards a little bit to cut a piece of cake, he accidentally saw her skin underneath the dark fabric – almost getting the view of the swell of her breasts. He swallowed harshly, immediately searching for his book to find the pages that have been driving him insane over the past weeks. ‘It’s fine. This is fine. Everything’s okay.’ He quietly warns his own body. Shawn shakes his head and takes a generous sip of his juice and tries hard to blink and miss the view of her not even noticing what just happened and still trying to cut a perfect square to place on a plate. “I... Mm... Have been reading from page 45 to page 97 over and over again for two weeks straight and-“ He starts with difficulty and, as if it wasn’t hard enough for him now, she’s licking and sucking at her fork she used to set under her piece of cake to lift it up and off the tin while looking him deep in the eyes, waiting for him to conclude his first doubt of the night. She didn’t mean to seduce him on purpose, but if she only knew the way she is messing with his head right now, she’d probably do something much worse. 

Shawn feels like cursing all the words he knows out loud. 

He’s been managing to keep his first impressions controlled for years. Why is this shit coming up again like he’s seeing her for the first time in his life? His brain, always hungry for coherent answers, figured things out in a matter of seconds. When he understood it all, he came back to earth and denied his own instincts angrily. Hopefully, he would never ever need to explain this reason to anyone else. 

“And?” Y/N snaps him back to reality, removing the fork out of her mouth and clicking her tongue to finish the small taste she had from the tiny crumbles that were glued to the steel.  “And... I...” He keeps on turning the pages frantically, not wanting to waste time. Who knows that she wouldn’t get him lost between running to the closest bathroom to splash some water on his face and staying frozen in his seat to never get up again until he stops hardening against his sweatpants during this quick lack of words? “I c-couldn’t quite understand and memorize these parts and their functions.” Shawn fixes a single curl back to its place and then he points to the figure on his book.  “Really?” She frowns. How a smart and handsome guy like Shawn can’t understand simple explanations about a vagina? “Why have you circled this so many times? You can barely see what it is.” She points to a messy grey sketch.  “It’s the clitoris,” Shawn rolls his eyes and clears his throat before moving on. “Need to remind myself that this shit is killing me mercilessly with this stupid amount of nerve endings.”  “You wish, Shawn,” Slicing her cake, she jokes and wraps her lips around the fork once again. Shawn can literally feel the palms of his hands sweating and he swears to God he could explode at anytime. Why anatomy of the reproductive system? Why not microbiology or pharmacology? He knew he should be a pro by now. “You better take notes about this little thing in particular if you want to pass or make a girl squirm under you.” 

Can she stop?  Great.  Now he’s picturing it. 

“Plus, I can guarantee you that, once you get to find where it is and how it works, you’ll wish you could reciprocate the merciless part everyday.” 

This is not study. This is torture.  Bad grades and bad thoughts. The “perfect” combo.  Shawn gets his notebook and pencils out of his bag and works fast to find a blank page to start writing. 

The time flies by with her careful explanations.  Y/N might joke a lot with him but she knows when to talk seriously.  She’s patient to describe every single detail and say things once more in a different way for him to see it all in a different way.  She speaks; he writes and asks again. All happening in a loop and Shawn’s pretty surprised that the chills that were taking over his lower region were gone now. He’s been doing his best by looking down at the paper all the time, refusing to peek at her.  “No! Nah-nah-nah...” She says and stretches her arm to grab the eraser next to him. He falls out of his concentration and reacts by traveling his eyes from her fingers to the expansion of her covered arm and finishing at her now exposed collarbone. The scent of her moisturizer escapes her robe to invade his nostrils. He can’t help but inhale deeply as she brings the eraser to rub the words he’d been writing.  “What’s that on your clavicle?” Still studying her skin, he asks impulsively. Shit.  She looks at him and then down at her own body.  “Oh... This?” She sets the fabric to the side a little bit more, now almost showing her entire shoulder. Shawn feels like choking on his own air. “It’s just a little scar. Got it when trying to run away from my cousin once. Nails strong enough to mark me,” She remembers and giggles lowly. “Unfortunately not as cute as this one you have on your face.” 

Shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit. 

She just noticed that she revealed loudly one of her favourite things about him.  For the first time in the night, he smiles.  He feels his chest burning – still shyly – and she can’t take her eyes off his beautiful teeth, perfectly shaped and getting her missing the patterns of her breathing. 

From there, the tension between them seemed to grow more and more and the emotions blooming up from this atmosphere were screaming louder than words, intensifying not only their desires but also the other feelings coming to their surface. It was like throwing alcohol in a bonfire. And it’s certain that the flames were getting higher and higher.  They tried to focus one more time on whatever they were doing now (neither of them cared to understand exactly what it was), Shawn a lot more lost than her, already writing things that weren’t even about anatomy, he thought. 

“Nope!” She says again.  Erase, wipe the dust, explain again. 

The clock is ticking. 

“Shawn, no.”  By now, he was finishing his third glass of grape juice and she had completely given up on her cake. Fork hitting the plate aggressively as she bends over the cold marble to repeat her actions. Shawn rubs his face and runs his fingers through his dark curls.  Erase, wipe the dust, explain again.

“Jesus fucking Christ, what the hell are you doing?” If she was patient before, she’s not losing her shit for fucks sake. “Vulva is this external part, not the inside. The internal part is the vagina, down here in this entrance, see?” She’s pointing with his pencil and circling the spots with caution, because otherwise she might rip the page apart. Shawn drops his arms against the island and tilts his head to meet the hard surface, hitting his forehead and his sighs turns into a deep growl. 

Erase, wipe the dust. 

“God! Have you ever seen a pussy in your life?” He freezes in place and doesn’t get up, hoping she’s going somewhere else with this question. “Seriously! C’mere, I’ve got this kind of a plastic mould and you’ll touch this shit until the information gets inside your head somehow.” She stands in her feet and she knows that she’s being kinda rude. He doesn’t care, he knows he’s not going anywhere if she keeps on being all nice and shit but at the same time he’s so nervous that he wishes he could stay in that kitchen for the rest of his life until his problem goes away.  “I don’t really-” His voice comes out muffled by the white marble under his face.  “Mendes, you’re coming whether you want it or not!” She grabs his arm and pulls him off his seat. “I told you I’d help you and you know I won’t stop until I get my work done. Come on!”  He seizes the last seconds where his face is still hidden to smile. He loves how much she cares about him now and it seems to vanish away all of her impulsive attitudes before. She just wants him to succeed and once she gets a goal inside her mind, she ain’t stopping until she makes it happen.  Shawn gives up and she’s practically dragging him upstairs to her bedroom, steps punishing the degrees under her feet. 

“Get yourself comfortable, I’m gonna find this thing.” She says as if he even could. Shawn falls in her bed while she turns the lights on and goes to her shelf, eyeing all the spaces where that mould could be hiding into.  She tiptoes across her bedroom and checks every part of it like her life depends on it. 

Wardrobe? No.  Drawers? No.  Desk? No.  Under the bed? No.  Bookshelf? No. 

If the bedroom was even larger, she’d be running a marathon across it and the way she’s walking with powerful footsteps and picked up rhythm makes the hem of her robe swing and get loosened, sometimes showing the back of her thighs a little bit more and gradually exposing her chest.  And if Shawn felt like dying before, now he’s sure that he’s floating between heaven and hell so quickly that he can’t do anything else but widen his eyes in desperation, fight his own mind and press down on her mattress for dear life. “You can’t think like that. She’s your friend, she’s not a piece of meat. Control your damn hormones.” He whispers to himself and closes his eyes. He doesn’t want her to think that he’s just another one of those stupid classmates of theirs or some kind of a weirdo who acts like he had never seen a semi-naked body before.  Although that yes, he had never.  Y/N might be cool about talking of sex and stuff, but he managed to just nod and agree. He never told her he was a virgin and something about the way she messes with him so easily makes him feel like organising a whole speech – in the most polite way ever – about how much he wants her to teach him everything: where to touch, how to touch and what to do to have her feeling not only relaxed in his presence but also pleased. If he only had the braveness, he’d be on his knees right now divided between begging for mercy or for a chance. 

She closes the last drawer where she guessed the plastic cast could be inside of and turns around with her hands covering her mouth. Shawn looks at her concerned expression and concludes that she’s thinking, considering how fast her eyes are running across the room. 

“Y/N, you don’t have to. It’s okay, I can find some other way...” Shawn tries to calm her and she tugs some strands, pulling them back and then dropping her arms down. She can’t think of anything else than this and she knows she might be taking a risk in here. She steps backwards to close her door and it gets Shawn frowning, gasping and blinking rapidly. What the hell is she doing? 

If he could’ve only guessed that some dreams can come true sometimes... 

“Mendes, don’t freak out, okay?” She looks at him worriedly and his grin is filled with doubts. He thought she was joking about his study routine or whatever happened a few seconds ago. But when he sees that her face ain’t changing to something more playful, he gulps once more. “You’re gonna have to do this in anyways in the final exam and, since you can’t even name things correctly, there’s no other way to do this. Tell me if you don’t wanna do this and I’ll stop.” She finishes and grabs the knot of her robe. In one fluid motion, she undoes it and the black fabric is pooling down around her feet. Right now she’s not thinking about her crush on him, she’s not trying to get him moaning her name. No. She’s trying to get anatomy inside his head because she’s been there before and she knows that, if he touches the wrong places, Sally is definitely not going to give him any other chances. There’s no dirty in here, there’s no seduction. She’s offering to a test just like she offered her veins once; or like when he let her feel his temperature and see if his throat was sore.  “What are you doing? Y/N, seriously...” He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. “Cover up, you don’t need to do it for me.”  “Is that what you want? I’ll do if you’re feeling awkward on doing this,” She reassures him and catches her robe from the floor. “But I want you to know that I’m okay with it. It’s totally up to you.”  Shawn can feel his limbs turning into cold stones and his leg starts to shake uncontrollably. He feels like someone just threw a ball on fire to him and he knows he’s got the opportunity to put the fire down. He just doesn’t know how.  “C-Can you... like...” He rubs his face, still not looking at her (who’s covering her front with the robe now) and tries to make a smart decision. “Get under your covers so I... can... t-touch you without looking at you?”  “Is this going to make you feel more comfortable?”  “Y-Yes.”  “I’ll try to guide you then.” 

An inconvenient silence takes over the place and it had never been so annoying. He gets up, turning his back to her and she goes under her blanket, trying to feel less unsuited.  “Hold on. I’ll wash my hands before... you know...”  “Second door to the right.” 

A few minutes later, Shawn is back and not so afraid. She looks at him and sees that his hairline is wet, he might probably had splashed some water on his face before returning.  “Are you okay?” She asks, feeling her chest heaving in concern.  “I’m good,” He closes the door with his foot and keeps his hands in the air, away from any object. “Sure you wanna keep going? You don’t have to-”  “I’m sure,” She nods and he sits at the end of the bed. “With that I’m even feeling like a real patient now.” She points at his hands with her chin and chuckles bending her knees. He follows her and giggles too. He can’t even believe how amazing she is, he feels like nothing in this world can gift her enough for being this good to him.  “You can, like, start from my pubic bone and then you can say what you remember, you know?” She incentivates him. “When you get to touch those parts we were seeing down in there, you’ll tell me what it is and what is it for.”  He nods and she shifts her body up closer to the headboard, making some space for him to come forward and slip one hand under the blanket.  “Don’t you want me to wear gloves?”  “I’m out of gloves in here but I don’t really mind.” She says and he’s just going with her flow. “Showed you my exams before the tests, so you also know that I don’t have anything you should worry about.”  She’s giving him so many reasons to leave his nervousness behind that he’s feeling like he’d forgotten for a moment that, on top of it all, they’re still friends. They’re not strangers. They should count on each other and this is what she wants him to do, this is what he wants her to do.  “Go on, I trust you.” Her sweet tone reaches his ears and he smiles at her, so happy to know that she’s there for him and, more than anything else, she sees in him a person that she can trust. It’s just priceless.  “And I trust you,” Shawn responds and she smiles back at him, feeling more comfortable against her pillows. “Excuse me.” He asks before touching her and she nods in confirmation, allowing him to go on. Shawn knows that this is not his body, so he must have her approval and excuse to touch her.  His palm is softly sliding along the expansion of her shin to her knee and inner thigh, looking her deep in the eyes, attentive to any sign that she’s not liking it so he can stop. He wants to show her that he doesn’t wanna hurt her or do something harmful, so he rubs his thumb from side to side, caressing her and showing that he’s being so careful. She looks at her own ceiling, trying to keep her breathing calm and remain herself that she suggested it, so she must stay true to her pure intentions and leave her dirty thoughts locked and forbidden.  He reaches the spot she told him to look for. He stops moving when he gets there and waits for her to give him another permission.  “What’re you touching?” She asks.  Shawn gets it as a chastise and lifts his hand up, widening his eyes. She slips her arm under the blanket and places it back to where it was, making him gulp and miss a heartbeat.  “I’m not asking you to leave, Mendes,” She laughs. “I’m asking you what’s this specific spot you’re touching right now. This is still a test.”  His eyes are still wide as ever, comprehending her words and looking for the answer in his mind.  “The pubic mound... Okay...” He answers more to himself and tries to remember the words she made him take notes about. “It’s... a fibroadipose tissue that stays on top of the bone and it divides into the labia majora on either side of the pudendal cleft.”  “Very good,” She praises and he smiles, actually wanting to scream in happiness for answering correctly and in tension, because her words made his nerves sparkle somehow. ‘Just breathe’ he says to himself as a mantra. “You can feel it if you want to.”  The tips of his fingers press lightly against it, choosing random spots to feel and then he lets go of it. He can read about it in the books where his gravity is going to be centered.  “Should I keep going?” He asks.  “Yes, please.” 

Oh God, not please.

Both of them getting a type of disquietude after this word in particular.  She didn’t mean to say it, she knows that ‘please’ doesn’t even fit correctly to the moment but somehow it escaped from her lips nearing a state of beg. She couldn’t let him know. This is still forbidden.  He swallows harshly and moves down slowly, almost reaching his next stop. 

“Okay, stop.” She says and he immediately stays still. “I’m gonna ask you something very embarassing but necessary.”  “...Alright?!...” Shawn eyes her with concentration, trying to understand if he did something wrong at any point.  “Lick your finger before touching this next spot,” Unable to look him in the eyes, she asks and covers her face. This makes him comfortable to remove his hand and lick his index finger before she can see him doing it. “You shouldn’t do this to your patients, but I’m very sensitive and when it’s all dry it might hurt a little.”  “Okay,” He gets back to where he was before and sets his hand back down on her. “Was I here?”  “Yup,” She says popping her ‘p’. “You can touch it now.”  His touch is now wet and cold, making her shiver slightly and it glides easily. She removes her hands from her face but keeps her eyes shut to focus on not getting wetter than his finger.  “Clitoris.”  “Nope.”  “No?”  “Try to remember about the first time I yelled at you downstairs.”  “Oh, alright.” He tilts his head down and laughs to himself. His finger is moving so delicately that it’s nearly tickling her heat. She shifts her ankles further just a little so she can see that flushy face of his, eyes now looking up as he tries to find a blank spot where his sight can help his imagination to picture what it looks like as he touches her. “Clitoral foreskin? Clitoral hood?”  “Hood is better.”  “Fine,” He grins. “It’s a mucocutaneous tissue that covers and protects the clitoris. It can fully cover the clit sometimes, but it also can just partly cover it.”  “Thought you’d never get it right, not gonna lie.” She confesses and he moves his pretty greenish eyes to look at her, and she finally reciprocates.  “Thought you trusted me!”  It’s so good to interact as they typically do. It’s so good to feel more normal and less awkard. The two of them could now feel their bodies relaxing and free to get back to joking and playing. Nothing’s really planned for ages before acting, it’s just natural. This is what they were looking for.  His cold calloused finger goes down shortly and she lets a sigh fly from her lips, instantly biting at her bottom one. She writhes sparsely, trying not to do what she’d normally do if they weren’t studying.  “Clitoris? Is it here?”  “M-hm.” “Erectile nub placed at the top of the vulva. It has around 8.000 nerve endings and blood supply. Would you mind if I see it?”  She shakes her head in denial and grabs the cover up to reveal her lower half, making it rest on her stomach.  Shawn takes his finger away for a moment to see the little nub and memorize where it is. He thinks he’d never seen something so beautiful in his life; he never thought it’d look this beautiful.  Totally compelled, he licks his digit again and touches her clit, differently from before. Now, he’s softly drawing tiny circles around it and she accidentaly moans lowly. The tip of his finger is sliding so deliciously that she couldn’t even notice the time when she showed such weakness.  “If you keep doing like this, you’re gonna turn me on and-”  “How sensitive is it?” He cuts her off and, to be honest, he wasn’t even listening. All of his concentration got directed to her clit, now swelling under his control.  “What?”  “How sensitive is it? With so many nerve endings, it must be really delicate. Isn’t it?”  She’s not quite understanding.  Shouldn’t he know this already? Or was he one of those guys who never finds a clit during sex?  “It’s sensitive enough to get me excited,” She warns but it’s not like he’s giving a single damn right now. “But if you press it hard, then it’ll hurt me bad. Like... you can add a little bit more of pressure...”  And he immediately does, watching the way his finger works carefully but performing firmly now. She exhales strongly, trying so hard not to lose her shit.  “A little bit more...” She demands and he obeys. Where is this going? She can’t answer herself now that this feels so good. His touch rounding her clit, sometimes going from side to side and he takes his time feeling all the extension of it. “Don’t go further than this, otherwise it’ll only harm me.”  This amount of pressure was just perfect for her taste. Shawn doesn’t even know about this, but he keeps going and he even leans closer to see it better. Now there was no hell, it was just heaven. Heaven in the way her face contorts everytime he hits the center of her clit; heaven in the way her chest is moving up and down, trying not to lose the pattern of her respiration; heaven in the way her eyes squinted – but no completely – peeking at him with some struggle. He stops eyeing her heat, saving the last information he got from it and looks at her, eyes practically dark.  “Let’s move on to-”  “Can I put my mouth on it?”  Her jaw falls.  Such a question she didn’t know she needed to hear today.  She knew she wanted to, but never knew she needed it so bad.  “Are you asking to eat me out, Mendes?” For a minute there, she thinks she’s dreaming. Dreaming wildly. She promptly supports her body on her elbows and tosses her blanket away from her body.  “I’m sorry. God, I’m sorry,” It’s like a force pushed him back to earth. He felt so intoxicated by her that his attention flew out to somewhere else. “I’m such a-”  “Do it.”  “What is it?”  “Do it,” She insists. Can’t miss the chance, can’t have him going back now. Not now. “You want it?” He nods kind of desperately. “Then show me what you can do.” She tilts her head to the side and smirks at him. His mouth forms an ‘o’ shape. Jesus Christ, she can get him around her finger so easily that he feels lucky that he was the one to get her around his finger previously. But how is he supposed to do this?  He decides to get started by kissing the inner part of her leg, planting wet kisses along her smooth skin and it feels so satisfying to have her skin exposing goosebumps under his touch. He’s getting closer and she sighs so sweetly that he’s hoping he’s doing the right thing.  The scent of her is driving him crazy, he can’t wait to know the taste.  “I-” He starts that old speech of explanation. He doesn’t want to but he feels like he needs to be honest with her and tell that he’s still a virgin. Lost and anxious to find himself. Find her.  “I know. I’ll guide you, don’t you worry about that.”  She’s just perfect. There’s no better definition inside his mind right now. He’s the opened book she loves to devour every single page of, absorbing the details and letting herself get immersed. She arranges her body on her bed to give him more space to lay down on his stomach and between her parted legs. When he finishes his trail of wet and hot kisses, she stands in one shoulder as her other arm goes to reach his brown curls that she loves so much.  “You can kiss it first,” She directs him. “See what it feels like against your lips and oh,” She moans because he wasted no time on licking his lips and kissing her clit. “G-Get yourself used to it, take your time to adjust yourself, no need to hurry.” But she didn’t really mean that. She does need the hurry, ‘cause she might collapse from this torture at any second.  Shawn tries the kissing, doing it from her clit and covering every inch of her lower lips then going back to the smaller ones. Over and over again, until he gets kinda bored. He wants to make her squirm like she said before in the kitchen. He wants to put his daydreams to a proof as quick as possible.  “You’re so wet,” He notices and is unaware of the effect it had on her. Her glistening pussy is inviting him and he wants to live in this for the rest of his days. He knows he has no experience, but this time, he doesn’t wait. He sinks his head down on her and his tongue is flattening against her heat to lick a stripe from her entrance to her clit, covering her with his mouth in order not to miss a single inch. And fuck she tastes so fuckin’ good. Nothing compared to his imagination.  “Oh my God,” Another moan slips out and she drops her head backwards, gotten my surprise. “That’s it...”  He embraces her thighs and her ankles are now resting on his back. His head buries in her pussy and she returns to look at him. It’s the best view in the world. Cheeks flushed and eyes closed, looking so serene and enjoying the taste of her like he never did with anything else. Shawn pulls her hips closer to him, growing hungrier and obsessed with this moment.  “Shawn!” She calls out and giggles, thinking that he’s also in the mood to play.  Not now.  “How hard can I suck you?” He pulls away, not going very far just to breathe and ask her.  “Hard enough to show me how bad you want me, not hard like a crazy animal would probably do.”  He groans against her heat and frowns in what he thinks it must be suffering. How can she get him so fragile to her? He feels his head spinning and she hasn’t even touched him back yet.  “What are you doing to me?” Shawn whispers, thinking out loud. He drags his tongue up and down against her boldly, mixing the wetness of his tongue with her wetness and it’s slow, painfully slow. She tugs his hair when she feels that tingling sensation down on her entrance and it spurs him on to try his first suction.  He does, giving her the best job he could do for the first time in his life.  “Close your mouth a little and suck harder.” She recommends and he promptly does. His lips are wrapped around her bundle of nerves as he licks her before, tongue gliding in circles and he’s keeping his tongue relaxed, what makes her see stars with this pleasant sensation. It’s so smooth and so tender that she’s afraid she’s going to pass out from the pleasure. He tries sucking for the second time and earns the perfect reaction from her: toes curling, eyes rolling to the back of her head and she gasps, body giving up against the mattress. She feels her clit throbbing and the way he sucks it is pushing her over the edge. It’s wet, it’s warm and so precise. “Fuck Shawn, fuck!” Her lungs are supplicating for air and she makes a good effort to look down at him again – eyeing her through his eyelashes – and, although he’s still finding a way to please her, he knows he’s being good, so he gives her a devilish smile. “Keep doing like this, baby, don’t stop...”  That’s it for him.  He tries to suck her again. It’s long he’s deliberately repeating series of suctions, having her crying out in her bed and arching her back. He tests it harder and faster and her hands instantly fly to grab his curls. Her moans are gradually turning into frantic screams and she’s trembling. Shawn Mendes never imagined he could get his friend shaking hectically with his mouth on her heat, sucking and licking her with his whole body and soul. His member is so hard inside his sweatpants but he doesn’t care, as long as she’s enjoying it, then he didn’t need something more. And he thinks she looks impossibly prettier with her beautiful lips parted to free her whimpers, sometimes smirking down at him to tease him; hair getting messier than her body quivering and being stopped by his large hands, caressing the sides of her waist and traveling down to the sides of her bum and legs, holding them forcefully so she wouldn’t escape from his touch.  “Shawn,” She gulps before moving on, throat dry from moaning uninterruptedly. “Pull away, I’m gonna come.”  With her clit gently tugged between his plump red lips, he shakes his head from side to side in denial lazily and it’s a new sensation to her, so so so good that her vision gloes blurry. Shawn just revealed himself not only stubborn in his studies but also in bed, and she’s so eager to dominate him like this...  He remembers about all the things they should be studying right now and maps her core to find her entrance with his index finger. Just as she taught him, he licks the digit and thrust it inside of her as soon as he finds it, bringing his mouth back to her clit to suck rapidly as his finger moves slowly. She fights back a loud scream, covering her mouth as she feels her pussy aching deliciously, searching for its release.  “Can you take two?” Shawn feels her walls squeezing his finger and doubts that she can keep another one.  “Yes, please.” She says through gritted teeth and it’s good to give this word the real meaning she wanted to give before. He pushes another finger into her and she moans once more, she doesn′t know how long she can wait. He thrusts the fingers so gingerly, not sure about what to do and what pace to pick. Was he hurting her?  “You’re so tight...” He comments so innocently, he thought that it wouldn’t be this constricted. He starts to imagine how heavenly his cock would feel hugged by her dripping pussy.  “Mendes,” She says under her breath. “I need you to go faster.”  “Like this?” He picks up his rhythm shyly.  “More.”  His digits are covered in her juices and moving with ease. She feels that knot on her stomach tightening and about to explode.  “More.” She begs and broken sobs are slipping past her lips. He goes deeper, fingers completely disappearing inside of her. “Right there! Oh, right there,” He finds her spot and her eyes roll to the back of her head once more, making Shawn dig the nails of his free hand into the skin of her thigh and suck at her bundle of nerves as fast as his fingers are working now. “Do it like this.” She can’t raise her hand right now to show due to her weakness but Shawn’s eyes are quick to find her fingers moving in a ‘come here’ motion and he immediately gives it to her. He can’t comprehend exactly where he’s taking her, but when she stops moaning and her legs starts shaking, he understands it. She’s feeling every inch of her core pulsating as her orgasm washes over her body and he can’t believe he just made her come. His fingers are slowing down and he pulls his mouth away, looking at her body coming down of her high. He removes his fingers slow and carefully and gives one last lick, catching what she released, and one last suck, her back arching for the last time.  He waits for her to settle down and get back to her senses before doing anything else. And when she does, she glances at him and silently invites him to come closer.  “You’ve done this before, haven’t you?” She taps his strong chest as he crawls over her, knees supported by the mattress under her parted thighs and upper half covering her front. He must be kidding.  “Not really...” He vents, embarassed but glad that he provided her something nice. “But did... Did this just ruin what we have?”  “I honestly couldn’t care less if it did,” She spits out and he fears her next words. “I couldn’t fucking wait to have you like this since the very first day we spoke.”  “Would it be weird if I told you I feel the same way?”  “Nope. But that’s something you can save for later,” She pulls him by the shirt and pecks his lips, savouring the taste of herself on his lips. “I wanna make you feel good first. What do you think about that?”  “Glad you finally asked.” 

[haydenstudiesblog-blog]

Paper Tips + Tricks in Lit(erature)

Sorry for that super lame title

Tip #1: Summarize in Lists

It’s always a good idea (BUT NOT REQUIRED) to include some sort of brief summary in your paper, but a common problem is allowing this summary to take up too much space on the page. We don’t need a run-down of the entire story; whoever is reading this paper has already read it. You just need enough to jog their memory. I suggest making a list of the important events in the story, the events that relate to your thesis, and pick the most important ones to use in the summary.

Tip #2: Include Author and Title 

It’s 100% required to mention both the author and title of the story you are analyzing or discussing in your paper. Like, non-negotiable. This may seem annoying, but there’s a super easy way to accomplish this... Just put it at the beginning of the thesis. Super easy, right? 

Here’s an example of an introductory paragraph I recently used in one of my paper, which got high marks (9.5/10 points) - 

Although many refuse to believe it, Christianity has a history of absorbing Pagan traditional values and forms. In her short story “The Company of Wolves” Angela Carter uses the fairy tale “Little Red Riding Hood” to demonstrate the complex relationship between Christianity and Paganism through the use of symbolic religious imagery.

So. Simple. And I didn’t even include a summary (which I did not get docked points for doing).

Tip #3: Include Genre

I took note of this the other day in my literature class. We cover up the name of whoever wrote the paper and project it onto the board to talk through together. One person included the genre in the middle of the author and title mention, so it looked something like this - 

In her fantasy-horror short story “The Company of Wolves” Angela Carter blah blah blah...

My professor commented on that, how she loved the inclusion of the genre, so I took note of it. It’s always nice to take note of the little things your professor likes to see in papers.

***However, I only recommend doing this if you’re super confident in the story’s genre. Or you can always look it up online.

Tip #4: Vampires Don’t Always Work

You may be thinking, “Uhh, vampires? When are there ever really vampires in literature? Why would I assume they always work?” Well, my friend, listen to this... There are more vampires in literature than we think. No, not the literal kind. I’m talking about literary vampire imagery. Example? You got it - 

Karen Joy Fowler’s “Heartland” is a short story about a young girl, Willina, who feels trapped in a tourist-trap version of Oz. She finds solace in a tourist who flirts with her at work, and she makes plans to run away with him. Then he leaves her behind, and she is so lost in anguish and longing that she decides the only way out is to take her own life. In this short story, Fowler plays with feelings of longing, ambition, and love; she successfully connects these feelings to victim-shaming and sexual assault through the use of vampire imagery.

Not my best introductory paragraph OR thesis, but you kind of get the idea, yes? It’s easier to understand if you read my paper, which you can; I posted it on my blog recently, the paper is titled “Vampires in the Heartland” and you can find it by going to my tag. But anyway.

Vampires in literature are any selfish character. They destroy others for selfish reasons. In the case of this story, the tourist is a vampire on this young girl Willina. He does not literally suck her blood, but she does end up killing herself so maybe in a way he sucked the will to live out of her. Vampires can be found in a lot of stories. But they don’t always work, so you have to be careful. If someone is acting purely out of desire and not selfishness, they aren’t a vampire.

Tip #5: Plan Structure

Let’s get straight to the point here - the best way to give your paper good structure is to just word vomit all over the page. But organize it into paragraphs. Word vomit everything you need to say about one point or one piece of evidence, and keep that all in one paragraph. Once you’re done, move on to the next piece of evidence or point and do it all again. Just keep it all separate.

I have a few ideas on how you can stay organized this way, whether you prefer to type or write everything down first.

Typing - Use a Word document, or your preferred place to type (I love Scrivener) and put each major point that you use to support your thesis on its own separate page. Word vomit on each page, then go through page by page and organize what you did until each page has a paragraph for that particular point that includes all of the evidence you want it to have. Once you’ve done that for every point, you can start organizing them in the order you want. The way they all flow together the best from one point to the other. After they’re in the order you want them, you have to create transitions between each point/paragraph. This is always the trickiest part for me, but once you have everything in the best order it makes it a lot easier.

Writing - Use a notebook and do the same thing; put each point on its own page and word vomit on each page. Keep it all separate. Once that’s done, mold each page until they are paragraphs instead of word vomit all over the page (also don’t worry about being neat with the word vomit, just make sure you can read it). Then consider ripping out all of the pages and physically laying them out in front of you, that way you can sort them into the desired order. Then of course you have to create transitions between each point/paragraph. 

If you are unsure about whether or not your points are in the best order, just hold tight...

Tip #6: Evidence/Points Order

Super basic advice here - decide what evidence is the strongest that supports your thesis and put that last. It’s easy to jump right in at the beginning out of excitement to talk about the best evidence you’ve ever found in your life that will make your thesis amazing and your paper a banger, but that leaves a very serious problem. What happens at the end, right before your conclusion? Your reader will be left disappointed. You got them all excited with that amazing evidence at the beginning, and left them hanging with the weakest evidence you had that really doesn’t do much. No. Leave them in amazement and put your best evidence last. Also a good reason to practice those structure processes I just talked about above.

Tip #7: Reevaluate Your Thesis

There’s a great chance that your thesis has somehow wound up in your conclusion. As you were writing, you probably got more and more excited and inspired and your mind created an amazing thesis and disguised it as a conclusion sentence. No. No. No. We’re not letting you get away with that. Hopefully you went ahead and waited until the end to do your introductory paragraph, because everyone knows those never hold up once you finished the rest of the paper, but in case you didn’t - go back and read it. Your thesis probably isn’t amazing anymore. Consider changing it.

Tip #8: Edit Forever

Up until now, you’ve just been writing your life away and organizing. Now, after you write your introductory paragraph (maybe before?), print out that paper and read it. It’s actually super important that you print it out to proofread it because our minds process it differently this way. You’ve been staring at it on the screen for a while now. Not only is your mind used to it, but our brains automatically skim things we read on screens. We read more thoroughly when things are in print. So print it out and proofread it. I recommend making marks in a color that’s NOT black, so it’s easier to see. And when you make a grammatical correction, circle it so there’s not a chance you’ll miss it when you go to fix it later.

Tip #9: Sentence Structure

Have you noticed that the rest of these tips are shorter? That’s because we’re almost done! But not yet.

You have limited space in this paper. You have a lot of points to make, and not a lot of room to do it. So you don’t have time for ramble-y sentences. Go through and get rid of those unnecessary words, like “that” (yes, 9 times out of 10 you actually don’t need the word). Where there are a lot of words where one will do, change it, but don’t do this so much that it doesn’t sound like you anymore. Your professor will notice if you sound like you have a PhD on paper and in person you couldn’t even tell them what half those words even mean. That doesn’t make you sound smart, it makes you look silly.

Also try to avoid going on long tangents in your paper. It can be hard, but try to notice them when you’re proofreading. Be concise in your sentences. Short, sweet, and to the point.

Tip #10: Double Check Citations

I’ll make a completely different post next week(ish) dedicated to citing literature papers. Until then, good luck. 

Tip #11: YOUR Title

You didn’t think I’d forget to address the title of your own paper, did you? Gosh. The key here is to just know your professor. I know my professor loves puns, so I try to make my titles appropriately punny. 

Here’s a secret - you actually aren’t allowed to just use the name of the story you’re writing about as the title of your paper. Annoying, right? Because that’s totally what I’d do if I could. You can use words from the title in your title. For example, the title of my paper of Karen Joy Fowler’s “Heartland” was “Vampires in the Heartland” but there’s a reason for this. The term “heartland” is actually what is used to describe the midwest, which is why it’s the name of the story. It’s used as a clue that this story takes place in Oz in Kansas, since that’s never explicitly stated in the story. There are just a ton of clues and hints dropped in that are meant to help you draw that conclusion. So I decided to use that in my title. And since my paper was about literary vampire imagery in this story, I settled with that name. My professor put a little heart next to it.

It’s fun to come up with punny names for your papers. Another example is my most recent paper, which was over a re-imagination of the Little Red Riding Hood fairy tale as a short story that demonstrated the history between Christianity and Paganism (my thesis statement for this is above). So for the title of that story I used “The Better to Preach to You With” which is actually super corny and I didn’t get a little heart next to it, but I almost got full points on the paper so she must’ve been fine with it.

You have to take the time to come up with a name, you might as well have fun with it.

That’s all I’ve got for now. I hope this was helpful. Feel free to add your own tips. Most of these are tips straight out of my literature professor’s mouth. Look for my post next week on citing a literature paper, which will be 100% tips by my professor. Of course every professor is different, but I’ve been using all of these tips on another literature professor of mine and she’s been good with them as well.

[scfrankles]

Thank you to @educatedinyellow for tagging me! How many fics have you written? On AO3 there are 149 listed. On DA, which is mainly original fics… er, 580. That does give rather a false impression though - about 100 are six word stories of varying quality, many of my ACD Holmes 60 word stories are crossposted there singly, and my 60 ACD Holmes clerihews are there too. There’s some other pieces that overlap with what’s on AO3, there’s poetry as well and a bit of non-fiction stuff. And of course on both sites I specialise in microfiction which doesn’t take long to write. Where do you share your writing? On AO3, LJ, DW and DA. What is your pseud? SCFrankles/scfrankles everywhere. Though I do also use maiden_aunt as a secondary pseud on AO3 for my Dear Ladies fanfics. Simply because I fancied having another name. Where/when do you usually write? I usually write at home, in the dining room (because it’s got a table) or sitting up in bed. And I suppose I do generally write in the evening after work. I am at my best in the morning and early afternoon though. I find it hard to concentrate and come up with ideas when I’m tired. I write best on my days-off, when I’ve had a good night’s sleep and I know I’ve got the whole day ahead of me. In terms of planning stories I often do that while walking or having a lie down. What is your favorite fanfic that you’ve read? I’ve rather fallen out of love with reading Sherlock fanfics but back when I was reading a great many of them, my favourite hands down was What to do When Your Flatmate is Homicidal by hyacinth_sky747. It is can’t-catch-your-breath-please-make-it-stop funny (there is a bit with John doped up on painkillers and writing a blog entry that I shall forever remember fondly - I’m laughing just thinking about it). But it also addresses the unpleasant and sad aspects of the world without any abrupt changes in tone. And it’s a story always full of hope and love. I’d love to be able to write like that. I do sometimes talk about ‘humorous stories’ and ‘serious stories’ as though it’s impossible to combine the two aspects but the best comedy always has a serious aspect too. Not that I make a habit of it, but the first time I ever stood up in front of a group of people and made them laugh was at my elder brother’s funeral. My fics tend to ignore real life altogether and be silly but I would love to write stuff that stares life in the face and makes you laugh anyway. Another fic I’d like to mention is the ACD Holmes fic Literary Shortcomings by rachelindeed - and not just because Rachel was the one who tagged me. Rachel wrote this as part of the summer 2015 round of ACD Holmesfest, with me as the recipient. It’s a beautiful, beautiful fic and I still love it. But I’ve chosen it here because I think it illustrates so well the possibilities of amateur writing, and the creativity in fandom. I can’t see there being much of a market for a story written in this particular microfiction form - it’s too left-field. I couldn’t see anyone ever writing something like this in the hope of selling it or a publisher ever commissioning someone to write something like this. Rachel wrote it for, I assume, her own artistic satisfaction and in the hope of pleasing me, the recipient, and the others taking part in the fest. Beautiful and experimental things that perhaps the professional world would ignore get to exist and flourish in the amateur world. What is your fave fic that you’ve written? Nothing really stands out as my favourite overall. I am quite proud of my longer Dear Ladies fics, my Without a Clue and Whitehead Holmes fics, and my collections of ACD Holmes 60s. And of course there is Watson’s Diary and my infamous ACD Holmes/My Fair Lady fusion… What inspired you to start writing fanfic? Er, it’s kind of a long story… I was a fannish kind of kid but I had absolutely no connection with fandom in any sense growing up - no fanzines or anything like that. And I came relatively late to using the internet - I first used it in 1999 when I was about 30. I absolutely loved it and from then I went online as much as I could, using computers at local libraries, but still no involvement with anything fandom related. And to be honest I had rather a skewed idea about what fanfiction was all about, as outsiders tend to do. In 2010 I joined DeviantArt. A couple of years later, we finally had a computer at home, series 2 of Sherlock had aired and I had just rewatched the series on DVD. And I felt the urge for more. I was looking forward to series 3 (hollow laughter) but it was a long way off, so I decided to investigate the Sherlock fanart and fanfics on DA. And I found a few perfectly nice and competent fics, and a fic that was off the scale badly-written but still oddly readable. And then I found Harry Knows Best by hbomb90. And I was blown away by it. Here was a writer writing prose at a professional level. At that point she was the best writer I’d come across on DA (it took me another couple of years to find the talented original fic writers there). And I wondered if she had other fics elsewhere on the internet. I Googled her name which took me to a rec list on LJ. So I did find more fics of hers but of course it led me to other Sherlock fics and other writers too. And those fics led me to other fics. I wasn’t paying too much attention at first to sites but  LJ and AO3 came up more and more. I did spend an awful lot of time on AO3 waiting for ivyblossom’s The Quiet Man to update so that encouraged me to explore the site. Like all kinds of fiction, with fanfiction you get all levels of writers. There are beginners, the competent, the experienced and the just plain talented. But I was just amazed by how many extraordinary stories there were online, written for fun and absolutely free to read. This was entirely out of my sphere of experience up to then. Good literature came in a book that you had to buy or borrow from a library. You became a writer only when a publisher graciously bestowed that title upon you. ‘Amateur work’ meant poorly written work. It was utterly amazing to me the quality of some of the work I was being presented with. And that you could talk to these talented writers! It wasn’t always a one way relationship. It changed my worldview - it really did. Essentially I thought, crikey, I want to be in that gang. Fandom was full of such creativity and, paradoxically, originality. But on a more minor note I also wanted to try new forms of microfiction and was very taken with 221Bs. Then I met someone on DA who was writing ACD Holmes 60s. I started writing them on DA on my own but was eventually brave and joined sherlock60 on LJ. And that was my proper entry into fandom - I found my niche in the ACD world. I think perhaps most of my Sherlock fics have a generic feel to them - I was essentially just reworking what I’d read. But I think writing ACD fics I found my own style a bit more. Though - I’ve said it before - I think I’m a good writer but I don’t think I’m a particularly good fanfic writer. Because although I enjoy discussing the source material that doesn’t really translate into the urge to write fiction about my thoughts. I think fanfiction is essentially about making closer examinations of the internal workings of the characters. I like writing stories in which people slide corpses down staircases on tea trays. What is your favorite trope to read? According to AO3, it’s ‘first time’. Which doesn’t surprise me. Though ‘angst’ is then joint second with ‘humor’, which really, really does. What is your fave trope to write? Not really a trope, but humour. What is the best piece of writing advice you’ve ever read/heard/would like to share? This is a difficult one to answer. Maybe adding on to the excellent advice I’ve read as part of other people’s answers - try not to compare your writing to others’ too much. I sometimes think someone is funnier than me, someone’s writing is lovelier, someone’s writing is better technically, someone’s writing is more insightful. And it’s generally true. But as a reader on AO3, I have 8 pages of subscriptions. Readers don’t just pick the top three best writers to read for the rest of their lives and ignore all the others. I read the work of many different writers because I enjoy them in many different ways. As a writer I try and remember to take pleasure in what makes my work mine. What is your favorite feedback you’ve received as an author? I had my answer ready even before I was tagged! On The Case of the Deceased Marmalade Thief, bubblesbythebeach commented: If a fic was ever going to be described as "shenanigans", this is the one and I for one am delighted Me too, kid. Me too… Anyone who sees this and wants to have a go, consider yourself tagged!

[sweetlifetownsville]

It's A Bugger ...But Maybe A Blessing, Too. Do We Need To Clean Up More Than The Mud And Mould?

The deliberate managed flooding of Townsville should be the catalyst for a far-ranging review of how we do things in this city and maybe the way forward is to know how we should not have done them before. Are we entering the phase of the faceless spokesman? Seems so, as Mayor Mullet suddenly refuses to comment on some matters. The floodwaters might have receded but some leeches are still hanging around firmly plonking their suckers on the public tit one exponent of the big suck is particularly prominent or has Shayne Sutton departed our company? and never the twain should meet its not just the Astonisher having problems with keeping the wrong ads away from the wrong story one of Britains more respected papers has dropped a complete clanger Plus your regular illustrated Trump gallery But first Damned If Adani Do, Damned If Adani Dont The Pies favorite acid-tongued columnist, the Guardians Marina Hyde dropped a wonderful line the other day, and while she was referring hopeless and hapless British conservatives, it is so apt for our Queensland goofarium in George Street, The Pie will borrow it the Palaszczuk Government is like a gif of someone lighting their own fart and then being consumed by the fireball. Jackie Treacherous Trad has the box of matches, and our premier is the one whos been chugging down the vindaloo and frothy XXXX, or should that be Adani Ale. Adding to the fireball was Queensland Resources Investment Commissioner Caoilin Chestnutt, who became a roasting chestnut when she described the Black Throated Finch controversy as an absolute mess which would delay any subsequent approval of the Carmichael mine by between six months to two years. That was a bit rich of her, considering she was talking in New Delhi, in a country which knows a fair bit about messes in politics and social ethics. But those critical of what they see as a cynical and dishonest delay are particularly incensed that arch-Greenie Associate Professor Brendan Wintle has been driving the review they see that as akin to having, say, Clive Palmer being out in charge of an inquiry whether chocolate doughnuts should be outlawed. But Bentleys on to the nutty professors game, who seems to have taken a page out of the hunting with hawks manual.

Still Searching For Icebergs

The mans sensitivity and sense of timing (not to mention decency) was on full display at the Casino ballroom a few nights ago, when Clive Palmer hosted a lavish dinner promoting his unicorn plan to build a replica of Titanic. This affair had a feel of as Rome burns, being staged just as the devastating extent of the flood disaster was becoming fully apparent. Clive seems fatally attracted to things that have been destroyed by natural disasters dinosaurs, the Titantic, but the cynical Yabulu disaster was all his own doing but his only nod on the night towards the immense local disaster was a pledge of $100,000 to help fund any class action against insurers that may emerge from a flood inquiry. Very handsome of the man willing to splurge $500million on a wild whim. But the bombast didnt finish on the night. A day or two later, Palmer called for the TCC to be put into administration and the mayor sacked, because of her handling of the flood disaster. While that scenario has been put in this blog and elsewhere as a question to be answered, it hasnt been asserted as a fact, until Clive came along. The response was predictable, but what was interesting was that although a subsequent headline said Mayor Hill Rejects Palmers Claim, the funny thing is she didnt. In fact, as far as The Pie has heard, she hasnt said tickety boo about his attack, and about claims from others that shes going to have to carry the can on this one. Instead, all of sudden, the mayor went all media shy and we got this

Now, all that be as it may, the thing that caught the beady eye were the words a council spokesman. That phrase has been as rare as rocking horse shit ever since former editor Mick Carroll ten years ago ruled that all such spokespeople needed to supply a name and position, no anonymity. (Dolan Hayes went thermonuclear over that one, but he lost anyway.)

So now it seems the council, via a faceless, nameless spokesman (they probably rolled out the rapidly expanding Tony Bligh of the Legal Dept) as an organisation is pre-judging any official findings about what role the mayor played in the deliberate flooding of hundreds of Townsville ratepayers homes. Something to be learned there, Jenna Cairney .. as Mick Carroll said all those years ago, if there is no name and position to go with statements, whats to stop people thinking the paper just made it up. And that is far more relevant now than when Mick was in charge. It Looks Like Its A Whole New And Overdue Ball Game For Townsville A trusted correspondent on this blog we know as Memory Man has offered many intelligent insights here. During the week, he sent in this story from the Guardian

and attached these comments. This stuff is actually serious, and requires very careful consideration. Simplistic fluff from the likes of Col Dwyer about the poor old North not getting its fair share doesnt address the underlying drivers of risk / mitigation that frame the market for regional insurance. I know talking to colleagues in the global insurance market that cutting out a middle man or two would reduce premiums by about 10% straight away. This means going directly to the underwriters. Only a local authority-backed insurance operation can do this. The Gold Coast City Council did this some years ago. The flip side is also risk mitigation. In part this means making sure the right things are built in the right places. This is easier said than done, because the right things is a function of a minimal specification, which in turn is driven by a given assessment of risk and impact magnitude. Now, the rule has been to build to a 1-in-100 year event impact. This isnt as silly as it sounds. Folk whove derided it as a meaningless measure because such levels have occurred more than once in the past 100 years miss the point of of probability. The reason why the measure is relevant is that it also goes to balancing out the costs of building the right thing versus the probable costs of loss (or replacement). Over-engineering is costly to build, and in many cases also unnecessary. Societies accept that there are some things that can be built to a lesser standard, and other things need to be built to a higher standard. Thats what the public debate should be focused on. Critical infrastructure should be built to a higher standard; things that are more easily replaced can be built to a lower standard. Additionally, everyone needs to recognise that the probability of severe events occurring is increasing (as well as the severity of events themselves). So, what would be described presently as a 1-in-100 may be better understood as a 1-in-75, for sake of argument. It also means that so-called 1-in-500 events may have a greater probability of occurring in the future than was the case in the past. So a revision of probability estimates to say, 1-in-400, may be necessary. Bottom line though is that all asset owners need to take proactive decisions to ensure their assets are built to such as level as warranted by the owners own assessment of the trade-off between cost to build today versus value of loss + cost to replace. Where there is a social cost, this externality needs to be added to the equation. The lesson is severe weather is more likely but this shouldnt be a reason to stop things being developed. It simply means being clearer about the right things being built in the right places, with trade-off risks being clear to those concerned especially when it involves public implications. A well debated argument, and The Magpie believes that new infrastructure rules about flood plain developments require urgent review. Chronic Cronyism: It Really Has Got To Stop The massive upheaval at executive level in the council has given us a glimpse of the outrageously blatant jobs for the boys and girls culture that the likes of Mooney (himself a beneficiary of the rort) and the mayor make little effort to hide nowadays. A very good case in point is this woman

Shayne Sutton, who is also the wife of Stephen The Screaming Midget Beckett, the lately punted Mayoral shouter at staff and ratepayers. It is not surprising that the council became stacked with imported Labor odd jobbers with questionable qualifications once Mayor Jenny Hills poisonous report commissioned from the Nous group in Melbourne was adopted by council, but Ms Sutton has added a new dimension in the grandest let them eat cake style. The Labor old mates club could not be shielded from view when Mrs Beckett arrived in town, following hubby north after the Qld Labor Party decided because of his bad manners, bad temper and bad judgements were not appreciated in the corridors of central power in Brisbane. Shayne Sutton has been a Brisbane City Councillors for 14 years when they upped sticks for Townsville. But she hadnt been here five minutes it seemed when she landed a plum $44k p.a spot on Tony Mooneys Townsville Hospital Board this has been reported here more than once. Seems mr Mooney just couldnt find any involved local suitable to his requirements. But what The Pie has just been made aware of is as well as handling that onerous hospital task (less than 6 meetings a year), Ms Sutton was a few weeks later tapped on the shoulder by Mayor Mullet for a newly created, totally bullshit position as wait for it the Executive Director of the North Queensland Regional Organisations of Councils (NQROC). The what, you cry? Well, this

Gosh, that must take a bit of doing, you wonder. Sure does, as the job description attests. The executive Director draws on her deep knowledge of the region, its history and its priorities and Provides strategic advocacy and engagement advice to five North Queensland Mayors and CEOs Facilitates regional collaboration between key internal and external stakeholders to progress agreedstrategic priorities for North Queensland Media management Organisational governance and financial reporting This is a made-up position that in fact didnt exist before, and at a guess since the kings of featherbedding the LGAQ are involved probably commanded a salary of around $70-80K. Gee, well, you say, shed have her hands as well as her purse full maybe, but not so much that didnt apply for a job the board of TAFE as well. Dont known how that went, and maybe well never know the full extent of Ms Suttons contribution to a community in which she has lived for barely a year. But this murky NQROC position seems to have been suddenly de-created as far as one can penetrate the layers of obscurity around these goings on, so perhaps she is on her way. Madam, you are a massive leech and our already benighted community can hardly mourn it if you pass on from our midst to infest some other poor bastards treasury. Making The Best Use Of Your Townsville Bulletin This latest in the series of cringe-worthy self-promotions caught The Magpie eye on Friday.

And good on you Freda, you really do look a very sprightly lady. May The Pie add his hearty congratulations on a milestone hell probably not even get within cooee of. And reading your story, mdear, the old bird now perhaps knows the secret of your wonderful longevity you gave a hint when you said your daily dose of news from the Bulletin was what set me up for a good day. Its part of ones everyday routine and I just cant get on without it. Its the first thing I need in the morning. Indeed, Freda. As it does for so many others, probably works better than prunes and porridge at a guess, youd be getting on by page 3 most days. Guess She Finally Came Out Of The Closet Seems the layout blokes at the Scottish Herald had a wee dram too many when they put this page together but then again, it may just have been the world renowned Scottish sense of humour. Eh, Jenna?

New Aussie Tennis Rankings .. Just released

And The Week In Trumpistan

It has come to our attention that too many of you are paying attention. The New Yorker

.. Back again next week, Allah willing, but have your say 24/7 on blog comments, plenty of frisky opinion out there along with information you wont get anywhere else (that is, until the Astonisher trolls have read the blog Mt Isa railway crisis two weeks after the Nest, anyone?) Hope you enjoy what you read here, and any support for the Magpies Nest will be greatly appreciated, the how to donate button is below. http://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/its-a-bugger-but-maybe-a-blessing-too-do-we-need-to-clean-up-more-than-the-mud-and-mould/

[lvlsrvryhigh]

LVLSRVRYHI-050: The Dance Pit | The Levels Are Very High

Hi Anuradha, how's it going? I usually start these things with a bit of an intro, so for anyone who doesn't know: who are you? Where are you from? Hi! It’s 3am and I think I’m finally done answering all these questions!

My grandfather named me Anuradha, though I’m still not 100% sure on how to “correctly” pronounce my name. I was born in Bangladesh, a year before Maluma. My star sign is a Capricorn and I’ve been living in the South Bronx for the past 21 years.

What are some of your early musical memories? I remember hearing Usher's Confessions album everywhere in 2004; Burn, Confessions Part II, and Yeah on rotation. That and Gasolina. That’s when I remember paying attention to music more (I think I’ve blocked most memories of MTV’s TRL out of my head), and then came the emo phase of ’07.

I also remember, though this isn't particularly musical, enjoying the Spice Girls lollipops that came with the stickers which is earlier in memory.

Whilst you run parties and a mix series as The Dance Pit, my first introduction to you was through (I think) the second issue of your zine Club Etiquette and then I kind of worked backwards from there. What first pushed you towards organising a zine? How did the specific idea for Club Etiquette come about? Mungo asked me if there were any parties he could play when he came over in 2015. I told him if I couldn’t find any, I’d put one on, which I decided to anyway.

At the same time, I was going to the club pretty regularly and would see the same people and we would always talk about what annoyed us, both on large and small scales, so thought a guideline would be handy, to be more conscientious of one’s surroundings and others. My school radio station (shouts to WBAR!) used to create zines, so thought that would be the most direct (least-bureaucratic) method. Since it was a guideline on “club etiquette,” that’s just what I decided to call it, although I still think the name sounds a bit bougie and will probably change it at some point.

My background is in activist theatre, so I was taught that anything I take on has to have a greater social purpose, cause what’s the point otherwise? (Don’t @ me with “art for art’s sake” – it may be for some people, but I have no time for it when so many other narratives don’t get heard).

Whitney Wei's illustrations that adorn the covers and grow throughout the pages of Club Etiquette provide the zine with this homemade warmth that carries over even into its digital copies, something that usually gets lost in the move to screens and online spaces of discussion. Did you find that it was important for you to produce the zine with that physicality in tact? Yes, shouts to Whitney! And Carmela Tzigana (who drew the Vol.6 cover). All cover aesthetic skills and most illustrations are credited to Whitney, who, regardless of the landscapes or deadlines I throw at her, manages to create something grounded and finely-detailed.

It makes me happy that you say that the physicality carries over (cause there is def some blood, sweat, and tears in some of those physical copies). I also really don’t like reading on computer screens, so if other people don’t mind and get past that, that’s great!

Tangibility, in a larger sense, is super important to me. Being able to cross over what’s written in the zine and enacting it in physical club spaces (or everyday life) is the reason why it was made in the first place. Theory is cool and all and part of the process, but actually putting ideas in practice is how I grow, and know what works.

A lot of Club Etiquette's material is necessarily born out of very personal and difficult experiences, but you also focus on some of the more lighthearted or even mundane aspects of club-going - 4am foodspots, hangovers, health tips, tv picks etc. I tend to find that these are the parts of the zine that fill me with the most nostalgia (for faceless nights I've mostly forgotten). What was the idea behind including them? How do you find the balance between them and the more serious aspects of each issue? I love the mundane. I also think there’s often a glamorization of going out needing to be the “best, most peak, night” of one’s life, like having a couple of nights where things get hella turnt is chill, but for me to constantly be at that level, I couldn’t do that. My club schedule is pretty routine and focusing on how to make up for lost sleep, or what to eat after I’ve danced for five hours straight, or what I watch when I don’t go out is really necessary for my survival.

Finding a balance between having both serious topics and lighthearted ones can be a bit tricky; I definitely don’t want to trivialize bigger issues by talking about/placing something silly right after. However, I do think that joy is also an integral part of our lives, and humor can be a place of learning as well. It’s the whole “I am not bound to one narrative” idea (that Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie talks about in her TED Talk), that I am not defined by only my traumatic experiences, but my day-to-day comforts too.

I also just watch a whole bunch of children’s television, so I’m trying to learn from that how writers can discuss heavy topics but not bombard people with negativity. Also, a very much large shout-out is needed for everyone who contributes; their perspectives make up so much of the humor and joy in the zine, and I really am grateful for the club community here that practices what they preach <3.

New York sits at this juncture between North, South, and Central American dance cultures which, at least this is in the impression I got when I was there, in turn, maintain musical interactions with and influences from the UK. You yourself have relationships that spread throughout this geographical club axis (from the stuff you've done with Hiedrah Club de Baile to your Dance Pit NY parties and UK tour dates). How much has the influence of this environment bled into the zine, your sets and/or the parties you put on? Is there anywhere else you could see yourself living? I want to preface my answer by acknowledging the “first-world” privilege of made-up “border” (by this I mean borders are arbitrary in conception but have very-tangible effects) mobility that I have. I have been immensely lucky to have been able to experience Club Viral, HiedraH Club de Baile, and the Salviatek nights in Monterrey, Buenos Aires, and Montevideo respectively as well nights in the UK before that (with HDD and the Hub-before-it-was-the-Hub <3) and each journey has definitely bled into every aspect of my life, as seen through my sets (which are all over the place), with the different translations of the zine, and through the djs I book.

I grew up and still live in a predominantly Afro-Latinx and Afro-Caribbean community so bachata, reggaeton, and dancehall are what I’m surrounded by most and I think that influence is clear in what I play. I will say though that it is irresponsible to just play the sounds and not give anything back to the communities who create this music both locally and internationally, so I’m still figuring out ways in which to support producers, djs, and club nights that have taught me so much that goes beyond just promotions or social capital. I think it can be easy to fall into the trap of appropriating sounds, so it becomes really important to *listen* when people say it makes them uncomfortable when you’re playing certain music. I want to believe there can be collaborative exchanges in music, but ultimately, under capitalism, someone will always reap the benefits off of the exploitation of other cultures, so I have to just be hyper-vigilant about what I play, who I play it for, how it affects them, and how I can give back.

For me, people rather than place define what home is, so with the hope that in the future all visa requirements and borders will be abolished, I would very much like to go back to South America (back to Argentina & Uruguay, and to the western coast this time around, but also with a much overdue visit to Brazil) and the UK (further north this time!) for an extended period of time to hang with people I very much consider family and give back what I can.

There's a growing tendency at the moment towards abstraction and experimentalism in tracks and sets, attempts to push (or destroy) the boundaries of what a dance track can be or how two (or three or four) tracks should be mixed together. Feeling and hearing an artist's intent in a way that I've barely even considered before is exhilarating but there's also been times when I've missed a certain concreteness. Come New Years - when I caught up with you in London - I was really just itching to dance. Is it important for you to get that sort of physical reaction to a set or a blend? What does dancing mean to you? I started djing, or rather selecting music, for friends who loved to dance when no one else would. So every time I dj or make a mix, I always have someone I know in mind who I want to dedicate the set to, they all just happen to be people who dance a lot. Getting a physical reaction to a set isn’t necessary, people react to music in their own way, but dancing may just be inevitable :)

Dancing is how I show my gratitude to djs and other musicians (in addition to showering them with compliments :3). It’s only a small token of appreciation for the continuous experience of listening to their music.

Talk me through the mixes - how were they recorded? What led to the two parts? It’s been three months since you have asked me to do this(these) mix(es). About a month ago, maybe, I chose to split them because my temperament was changing so often (I blame the weather, the 2+ retrogrades, etc.) and also my attention span was/is decreasing daily.

The first mix is definitely for when I’m in one of my angsty moods, and am placing expectations on others, when I should just let them be. I also wanted to try constraining some parts in the mix to just highlighting certain instruments.

The second mix I made so I that when I play it on my monitors, my neighbors can listen to even more Bad Bunny than they have already been blasting onto the block on a Sunday. 

Both mixes are heavily influenced by my travels at the end of last year.

I live-recorded these (way too many times) and added any extra effects on audacity.

What do you have planned for the rest of 2017? I’d really like to continue the translations series of the zines, and there are def a couple more zine release parties in store for this year. My annual tarot card reading said I’ll find a new skill which will be my life’s work in October, so hopefully that’ll happen. As I mentioned above, I’d like to visit all my friends if possible, maybe finally make that mixtape hehe.

But most importantly, curating netflix for my mom and volunteering locally to facilitate and preserve music, arts, and community spaces in my neighborhood when displacement is already happening.

Finally, if you had to pick something for people to listen to immediately after these mixes what would it be? Trick Answer: Go watch Steven Universe, give your eyes, ears, mind, and heart a treat. (That and Silver Spoon too please! - oh but also listen to Common Sense).

"Night" Tracklist

Sand Pact - Fervor w/ Nato - Cerita interlude Bad Bunny - Soy Peor (Axel Caram remix) DJ Nervoso - Djj Kala - Boriken Brazilian Percussion - Samba-Reggae 2 Cardi B interlude MC Lustosa_Shaded Pistola (MM edit) Gigi - Cah PayTay (Reply) Lechuga Zafiro - Suave Pero Rugoso (Diosa Tayhana remix) w/ TT The Artist - Worst Bday interlude Badgyal (Prod. Plata) - SMTHIN LIKE THIS x Dholi Taro Dhol Baaje Karaoke Version Aggromance - 1noche x Leokarlo - Intro ‘New Era’ x Dj Fofuxo - Raizes “Nu Guetto Qui Ta Bater” BAD$ISTA - Last night* Raman Saran - Dhak (Drum) Lechuga Zafiro - Orquídea T-Ney Kid Cala - Blue Magic (Loris Remix) Soda Plains - Espalho Meu Passo w/ Toshiro Masuda - Orochimaru’s** Theme interlude MC Linn da Quebrada - Mulher Totó La Momposina y sus tambores - Rosa FUNERAL - Cumbia futura Shivam Gupta - Durga Theme DJ Nervoso - Areia x Rebecca Sugar - Here Come’s a Thought Steven Universe - Rose’s Room dialogue***

*my phone# is on my last mix, call me up (thru facetime/whatsapp, bless) **i dont support/sympathize with orochimaru, they are a creep ***I hope Steven will be ok

"Day" Tracklist

Dj Valet - O começo Dj Nk - Caipirinha Vany-Fox - Me vs World Bk(blackinhO) - Funana [Batucada] Badgyal - Dinero (Prod. FAKEGUIDO) Bad Bunny ft. De La Ghetto, Zion, Bryant Myers - Caile (Dj Arturex & Dj Kris Club Version) MC Katia - Arrocha Das Fiéis (DJ Xaropinho) Conejx - Parvada w/ Bryant Myers ft. Bad Bunny - Un Ratito Mas interlude* Yxng Bane ft. Kojo Funds & Wizkid - Fine Wine Gage - Throat (Street Mongrel Riddim Version X Talkdunsk Remake) DJ Spinall ft. Wizkid - Opoju Yandel - Encantadora (El Kechu DJ Cumbia base Remix) Anuel AA - Ayer (Elián Acapella Remix) Epic B - Wicked Riddim Javed Akthar - Azeem O Shaan Shahenshah Instrumental Vybz Kartel - Fever (Dj YaMtZa Remix) Florentino - Bloodline x Florin Salam ft. Denisa - Cineva Ma Suna Cu Numar Privat deejay jeff love c pikachu 2pekes (Pininga Edit) Sikuri - Aamado Murlo - Hunter Tina Savage ft. Don Jazzy - Eminado (DJ Yoko Champeta Remix) Superficie - Febre Do Vale Joha - Me Llama Glolaluz - Me Controlas FUNERAL - Reverberacion Antenas ———————————————— J Hus - Did You See x Sikuri - 0

*use condoms! + Special thanks to Callosum, Mungo, Becky, and Michelle <3

[berbaquero]

Reeddit, six years old

6 years ago today, I gathered the courage to put Reeddit out there. To share it with other people. It was my first serious attempt at building a complete, frontend-only web-app.

Reeddit is basically an alternative way to browse reddit.com’s content. While I love to read and browse reddit.com, I never really liked their UI- specially on their mobile site, which was really cumbersome and ugly, at least back then.

Also, I wanted to become a proper web frontend developer! I had worked with Java for almost 4 years by then and sure, I had to work with HTML and CSS over the years, but it always felt like I was only scratching the surface, and JavaScript had always completely eluded me.

So this was, in my mind, the perfect way to address those things: I would design and build the reddit UI that I’d love to use, and by doing so, I would learn as much as I could about what frontend development really was, learn the proper foundation— JS included.

In the span of ~5 months, working a couple of hours every week after work and a bit more each weekend, I built a responsive, single-page web-app for just reading reddit. And by doing so, I had learnt so, so much about building things for the browser; how to tame the DOM (thanks to jQuery/Zepto!) and the Cascade, the Box Model, how to use Flexbox (so shiny and new back then!). And I had more or less built the alternative reddit client that I wanted.

But that was supposed to be it! I built it for me. So I could use it myself. I didn't consider publishing it on the web— not initially.

But after showing what I had done so far to a friend from work, he told me "you should put it out there! It's nice!", to which I said that wasn't in my plans because I didn't think it was good enough for people to use it and much less like it. And then he said "if you already find it useful or good for yourself, there will be others who will agree and use it as well".

And that made me realize: if there was a single person who finds Reeddit, uses it, likes it, and continues using it, that'd be a huge satisfaction for me. Enough of a reward.

So for a couple of days I worked on making Reeddit a bit more "presentable", and made sure it worked fine in all the browsers I had installed, which were desktop and mobile Safari, Chrome, Opera, and Firefox.

And finally, on November 20th, 2012, I shared it with the world; first with my Twitter and Facebook network (announcement tweet), and then on reddit itself (thread on r/webdev).

I considered also showing it to Hacker News, but decided not to because I thought it was definitely not HN-worthy and that it would be shat upon if I did share it there. So I didn't. Silly me.

The reception on twitter and reddit was pretty much what I expected and hoped; people gave me good feedback, suggestions, and compliments. It was great. It felt good to share what I had worked on and to see it being well-received. I figured the cycle was complete. That the project was over as it had served its original purpose.

But it was far from over.

Less than 2 months later, during the first week of January 2013, someone :) shared Reeddit on Hacker News, and I only found out about it because after waking up that morning, I saw I was getting a lot notifications from people making tweets about Reeddit! All because of the weird machine that is Hacker News top posts.

So, I learned that there's a bunch of twitter bots that automatically tweet when a HN post receives certain amount of votes; here's reeddit getting 50 votes and here's reeddit getting 100 votes. And I guess people that follows these bots started reacting to those tweets and checking and tweeting about Reeddit. Then HN's post reached the top 2 spot on the frontpage.

And then it quickly reached the top of HackerNews' frontpage. Gulp.

The buzz generated by HN and Twitter was picked up by some big websites:

Designmodo tweeted about Reeddit.

Venture Beat published an article and tweeted about Reeddit.

Mashable published a video article about Reddit — although the actual video doesn't seem to work anymore. Boo.

And best of all, Alexis Ohanian himself tweeted about Reeddit.

It was crazy.

Those were a very awesome couple of days. It made the whole thing so incredibly rewarding. Much more than it already was.

But it was not over.

Even after the online buzz faded out, I learned of another benefit from it; I started getting approached by a few companies that were interested on me joining them as a frontend developer. One of them was a big one, and I couldn't believe it. And even though none of those worked out –as I would have had to move to a city I didn't really want to– the fact there was interest in my profile as frontend developer gave me the confidence to persue that path completely, and apply for Frontend Dev jobs in Amsterdam, which is what I really wanted.

Very fittingly, while using Reeddit myself one day and browsing the Amsterdam subreddit, I stumbled upon a post from someone sharing a job opening in the city, to which I replied with interest. Long (sub)story short, it was the experience and knowledge that I got from building Reeddit, and the confidence that its reception got gave me, what ultimately resulted and me getting a great job and moving to Amsterdam.

Afterwards, I continuously used Reeddit as my code playground, trying new things while fixing its bugs or adding new features, experimenting with new frameworks or libraries, or just applying the new things I'd learned at work. I believe I learned Sass/SCSS by migrating Reeddit's styles to it.

Reeddit has also received some open-source contributions during these years, which has always made so happy, humble, and very thankful, and has inspired me to give back— even though I don't do it as much as I should.

But it's been a while since I've done any work on Reeddit. I still love the product, but I feel like I've moved on from the codebase.

For almost 2 years now, I haven't really improved Reeddit. It got an improvement some weeks ago via a Pull Request on GitHub (yay open source!) but that's been pretty much it since years.

And it's actually a great feeling to see something you haven't had to support for a long time is still working fine. Of course, that's partially also thanks to Reddit itself not breaking its public API and to a very stable GitHub Pages service. But it's ultimately a testament to how wonderful The Web as a platform really is. How things that haven't been touched for years are still perfectly usable and accessible. I love it and don't take it for granted.

And I will try to make sure that my now-6-year-old Reeddit web-app stays usable and accessible in the future; but it's time to officially feature-freeze Reeddit.

It's time to move on.

To Reeddit 2.

--

Footnotes:

The first improvement to Reeddit after releasing it was done just around 30 minutes after sharing it on reddit and getting the suggestion to show previews for image posts, in the comments view.

For some time at the beginning of the published codebase, all the JS code was wrapped in a single jQuery/Zepto $.ready() function.

Firefox had no support for Flexbox back then, so I had to do some sort of browser detection and use Floats instead. Yikes.

Reeddit's UI was inspired by HNMobile, now known as HackerWeb, by @cheeaun. When I used HNMobile for the first time on my iPhone 4S, I remember being blown away by the fact a web-app could look and feel so smooth and native.

Yes, I'm building a new version of Reeddit!

[reincarnatedasacupcake]

art by Stellaarts

Another month has gone by and I am really enjoying this whole summer vacation thing. That being said, I can't wait to go back to school in the fall, but I will take the time to relax and read while I have it. Here's what I read this month:

Long May She Reign

by Rhiannon Thomas

422 Pages (10:30 Hours)

Freya was never meant to be queen. Twenty-third in line to the throne, she never dreamed of a life in the palace, and would much rather research in her laboratory than participate in the intrigues of the court. However, when an extravagant banquet turns deadly and the king and those closest to him are poisoned, Freya suddenly finds herself on the throne. She may have escaped the massacre, but she is far from safe. The nobles don't respect her, her councillors want to control her, and with the mystery of who killed the king still unsolved, she knows that a single mistake could cost her the kingdom-and her life. Freya is determined to survive, and that means uncovering the murderers herself. Until then, she can't trust anyone. Not her advisers. Not the king's dashing and enigmatic illegitimate son. Not even her own father, who always wanted the best for her but also wanted more power for himself. As Freya's enemies close in and her loyalties are tested, she must decide if she is ready to rule and, if so, how far she is willing to go to keep the crown.

This was a lovely book that I truly enjoyed. Only in fantasy can you find an awkward girl who loves science and has severe anxiety who becomes queen simply because she couldn't stand to be social. I love it! As soon as I finished it I went to look for the next book in the series, only to find out that it was a stand alone book! Don't see much of that these days. It's kind of nice that it can stand on it's own, although I would totally read more about this amazing woman trying to do her best to be queen and still be herself.

Soppy

by Philippa Rice

108 Pages

True love isn’t always about the big romantic gestures. 

Sometimes it’s about sympathizing with someone whose tea has gone cold or reading together and sharing a quilt. When two people move in together, it soon becomes apparent that the little things mean an awful lot. The throwaway moments in life become meaningful when you spend them in the company of someone you love. 

SOPPY is Philippa Rice’s collection of comics and illustrations based on real-life moments with her boyfriend. From grocery shopping to silly arguments and snuggling in front of the television, SOPPY captures the universal experience of sharing a life together, and celebrates the beauty of finding romance all around us.

This is a very sweet book and I see a lot of reflection of this love in my real life, which is super nice. It reminds you that love is in the little things and that we all show our love differently. I had always loved when I came across some of these comics online, so I was thrilled when I found the whole collection of them.

The Kitchen House

by Kathleen Grissom

369 Pages

When a white servant girl violates the order of plantation society, she unleashes a tragedy that exposes the worst and best in the people she has come to call her family. Orphaned while onboard ship from Ireland, seven-year-old Lavinia arrives on the steps of a tobacco plantation where she is to live and work with the slaves of the kitchen house. Under the care of Belle, the master's illegitimate daughter, Lavinia becomes deeply bonded to her adopted family, though she is set apart from them by her white skin. 

Eventually, Lavinia is accepted into the world of the big house, where the master is absent and the mistress battles opium addiction. Lavinia finds herself perilously straddling two very different worlds. When she is forced to make a choice, loyalties are brought into question, dangerous truths are laid bare, and lives are put at risk.

A masterfully written book that really hits you in the heart. This was one of my LLB for the year and I'm really glad that I finally decided to pick it up. It's one of those books that discuss race, gender and the terrible treatment of each in the past. For people that loved The Help, The Secret Life of Bees, The Invention Of Wings and other similar books that break our hearts and remind up that we need to do better.

Garnet's Story (The Lone City #1.25)

by Amy Ewing

100 Pages

In The Jewel and The White Rose, we follow Violet in her servitude under the Duchess of the Lake. Now we’ll hear the Duchess’s son, Garnet’s, story in this digital novella—a companion story to the New York Times bestselling Lone City trilogy.

Garnet, the son of the Duchess of the Lake, has always been a spoiled playboy. But now, for the first time, Garnet is beginning to realize the horrors that his family, and the ruling community, have perpetrated. And he just may be ready to do something about it.

Unlike the other short stories for this series, I actually really enjoyed this one. Yes, it is a reiteration of the other book, but is a totally different, unique story. I really enjoyed watching Garnet and the beginning of his transformation. 

Adventure Time Vol. 1 (Adventure Time Volume 1; issues 1-4)

by Ryan North, Braden Lamb & Shelli Paroline

128 Pages

It's ADVENTURE TIME! Join Finn the Human, Jake the Dog, and Princess Bubblegum for all-new adventures through The Land of Ooo.

The totally algebraic adventures of Finn and Jake have come to the comic book page! The Lich, a super-lame, SUPER-SCARY skeleton dude, has returned to the the Land of Ooo, and he’s bent on total destruction! Luckily, Finn and Jake are on the case...but can they succeed against their most destructive foe yet? Featuring fan-favorite characters Marceline the Vampire Queen, Princess Bubblegum, Lumpy Space Princess and the Ice King!

Adventure Time... come on and grab a friend... This was pretty much what you would expect from an Adventure Time comic. I think my favorite part was that they introduced a new princess; desert princess, who is a cupcake who had sand powers. Love it.

It's All Absolutely Fine

by Ruby Elliot

256 Pages

IT'S ALL ABSOLUTELY FINE is a darkly comic, honest and unapologetic illustrated account of the daily struggles with mental health. Ruby Elliot, aka Rubyetc, is the talent behind the hit tumblr account, 'Rubyetc', which has over 220k followers and growing. Taking readers on a journey through the ups and downs of life, the book will encompass everything from anxiety, bipolar disorder and body image to depression and identity, shining a light on very real problems - all framed with Ruby's trademark humour and originality.

Ruby balances mental health with humour, making serious issues accessible - and very funny. With the superb talent to capture the essence of human emotion (and to make you laugh out loud), this book is as important and necessary as it is entertaining. IT'S ALL ABSOLUTELY FINE will include mostly never-before-seen material, both written and illustrated, and will be an empowering book that will make you laugh, make you think, and make things ok.

This is another of those comics that I always loved when I saw online, but wow was this book intense. I wasn't quite expecting that. Her comics can be too real and really hit you when you aren't expecting it and her writing gives you a look into her sometimes gritty reality that she tries to deal with through her humor. That be said, the humor is great, but not something to read to cheer yourself up. I made that mistake.

666 Park Avenue (666 Park Avenue #1)

by Gabriella Pierce

320 Pages (9:28 Hours)

What if your mother-in-law turned out to be an evil, cold-blooded witch . . . literally?

Ever since fabulously wealthy Malcolm Doran walked into her life and swept her off her feet, fledgling architect Jane Boyle has been living a fairy tale. When he proposes with a stunning diamond to seal the deal, Jane can't believe her incredible luck and decides to leave her Paris-based job to make a new start with Malcolm in New York.

But when Malcolm introduces Jane to the esteemed Doran clan, one of Manhattan's most feared and revered families, Jane's fairy tale takes a darker turn. Soon everything she thought she knew about the world—and herself—is upended. Now Jane must struggle with newfound magical abilities and the threat of those who will stop at nothing to get them.

This is the other LLB for the month. Yes, I am trying to catch up, since I am already so far behind with these. I tried to read this book a few times and kept putting it back down in favour of something better. Finally I found a copy of the audiobook on the Library and decided to listen to it instead. MUCH better idea. That being said, it still wasn't a great book. There were so many red flags going on that it was hard not to grimace through most of it. I'm glad it ended like it did, but I'm not going to pick up the next book.

A Wicked Thing (A Wicked Thing #1)

by Rhiannon Thomas

337 Pages (8:42 Hours)

A spinning wheel.

A prick of a finger.

A Terrible curse.

One hundred years after falling asleep, Princess Aurora wakes up to the kiss of a handsome prince and a broken kingdom that has been dreaming of her return. All the books say that she should be living happily ever after. But as Aurora understands all too well, the truth is nothing like the fairy tale.

Her family is long dead. Her "true love" is a kind stranger. And her whole life has been planned out by political foes while she slept. Everyone expects Aurora to marry her betrothed and restore magic and peace to the kingdom before revolution tears it apart. But after a lifetime spent locked in a tower for her own safety, Aurora longs for the freedom to make her own choices. When she meets a handsome rebel, she is tempted to abandon everything for a different kind of life.

As Aurora struggles to make sense of her new world, she begins to fear that the curse has left its mark on her, a fiery and dangerous thing that might be as wicked as the witch who once ensnared her. With her wedding day drawing near, Aurora must make the ultimate decision on how to save her kingdom: marry the prince or run.

A Wicked Thing is a surprising, spellbinding reimagining of what happens after happily ever after.

I enjoyed Long May She Reign (see above) so much, I looked to see what else she had written and came across another series by her that was right up my ally. What? A retelling of Sleeping Beauty after she wakes up waaaay in the future! Yes! Gimme gimme gimme....

I inhaled this book, listening to it as often as I could and finding excuses to have it on in the background. I would've gone right into the second book (yes, this one has a second book!) had I not had a few other audiobooks waiting in my auto-checkout. But I can't wait to get back into it.  

Suffragette: The Battle for Equality

by David Roberts

128 Pages

2018 marks a century since the first women won the vote in the United Kingdom, and Suffragette tells the story of their fight. This is a tale of astounding bravery, ingenuity, and strength. 

David's conversational style is accessible and his artwork full of rich detail, bringing to life the many vivid characters of the Suffragette movement - from the militant activist Rosa May Billinghurst to the world-famous Emmeline Pankhurst. Covering the whole range of suffragette experiences - from aristocrats to the middle and working classes, as well as a look at the global struggle for universal suffrage, Suffragette is a fantastic introduction to a fascinating topic.

This book was really neat; part book and part comic. History always seems to skip over these brave and crazy women that got us the vote and it was really neat to get to know more about them. Wow, some of them were super intense with their methods and suffered awful consequences. The one thing that I was sad about was that the last couple of pages were dedicated to women of colour who had helped in their own countries, but there was almost no acknowledgement of the fact that WOC fought along side these other women and were relegated to the back of the parades and congregations. 

Temporally Out of Order

by Joshua Palmatier & Patricia Bray

294 Pages

It’s frustrating when a gadget stops working. But what if the gadget is working fine, it’s just “temporally” out of order? What would you do if you discovered your cell phone linked you to a different time? Or that your camera took pictures of the past? 

In this collection, seventeen leading science fiction authors share their take on what happens when gadgets run temporally amok. From past to future, humor to horror, there’s something for everyone. 

Join Seanan McGuire, Elektra Hammond, David B. Coe, Chuck Rothman, Faith Hunter, Edmund R. Schubert, Steve Ruskin, Sofie Bird, Laura Resnick, Amy Griswold, Laura Anne Gilman, Susan Jett, Gini Koch, Christopher Barili, Stephen Leigh, Juliet E. McKenna, and Jeremy Sim as they investigate how ordinary objects behaving temporally out of order can change our everyday lives.

I pick up this book because it had a Seanan McGuire story in it and not really realizing that it was a bunch of short stories. As all collections like this, they can be super hard to read. I'm not a huge fan of short stories and I find very few people can tell them well. There were only a few that I really enjoyed and they others ranged from okay to (when will this be over) terrible. The authors I did like I ended up looking up to see if I could find other books by them, so if nothing else, I did find more books to read.

Spell on Wheels, Vol. 1 (Spell on Wheels #1-5)

by Kate Leth, Megan Levens, Marissa Louise, Jen Bartel & Nate Piekos

136 Pages

A road trip story. A magical revenge fantasy. A sisters-over-misters tale of three witches out to get back what was taken fom them.

Andy, Jolene, and Claire aren't your average twenty-somethings. They're legacy witches making their way through a modern world. When a jealous nonmagical ex breaks into their home and steals a spell that could awaken potentials with magical powers, the witches plan their revenge. Traveling down the East Coast, they must retrieve their powerful stolen artifacts and strengthen their friendship... the big bad is even worse than they imagined.

I need more of this. Why isn't there more of this? This comic was so fun and fabulous that I couldn't put it down. I want more stories about these 3 women. I want novels about them; full series of them. Or at least more comics if you please.

Lumberjanes (Lumberjanes #3)

by Noelle Stevenson, Grace Ellis & Brooke A. Allen

27 Pages

The girls have a lot more to worry about than crazy creatures and supernatural events...they have FIELD DAY. It's a competition between the Lumberjanes and the Genteel boy camp next door that's going to be filled with surprises!

I love this gaggle of girls who are ready for crazy adventures. I really wish that these comics had been out when I was younger. It's nice to see. In this volume they come across a secret cave full of magical traps and pit falls and it will take all of them working together to make it through.

A Tangled Web (Five Hundred Kingdoms #5.5)

by Mercedes Lackey

91 Pages

Kidnapping Persephone should have been an easy task. But in the Five Hundred Kingdoms, nothing's ever simple—and the wrong blonde goddess is stolen by mistake, leaving Prince Leopold without his new bride. At least until he braves the realm of the dead to get her back...

I think I've mentioned over the last couple of years that I've been disappointing in the material that Mercedes Lackey has been putting out. But I remembered loving this series of fairy tales turned on their head and couldn't wait to read this short story about Persephone. I shouldn't gotten my hopes up. It wasn't very good. The story takes place on Olympus and in the Underworld, which was interesting, but none of the characters had any life to them. Some of the main characters are secondary characters from the book before, but I can't recall them at all. It spends half the book trying to remind you of their adventures from before (which I am still coming up blank on. 2010 was a long time ago) and doesn't really go into the story that it's in. The only flipping of the story is that these 2 other people are involved in helping and that Persephone knows who Hades actually is from the beginning. 

Henchgirl

by Kristen Gudsnuk

304 Pages

Mary Posa hates her job. She works long hours for little pay, no insurance, and worst of all, no respect. Her co-workers are jerks and her boss doesn't appreciate her. He's also a supervillain. And her parents... well, they're the most famous superhero couple in Crepe City, along with her sister. Cursed with a conscience, Mary would give anything to be something other than a Henchgirl, but no matter what she does her plans always seem to go awry.

This was a really fun comic. Sometimes it's nice to read about the bad guy or his henchpeople. This comic takes a lot of wacky twists and turns that I wasn't expecting and has a great cast of heroes and villains. I also love all the little pop culture Easter-eggs that keep popping up. This is another series that I want more of.

Fraggle Rock: Journey to the Everspring #1

by Kate Leth & Jake Myler

27 Pages

When the water supply of Fraggle Rock mysteriously runs dry, the Fraggles have to journey deep into the caves of Fraggle Rock to find the fabled Everspring where adventure awaits and no Fraggle has gone before! It's the beloved characters of Fraggle Rock in their biggest story yet!

I thought this would be another fun volume to read, but it turned out to only be the first comic. It's very cute and reminded me how much I use to love the Fraggles. I actually had to stop and think about what each of them sounded like so I could get a better sense of them in the comic I wandered around for the next few days with the theme song stuck in my head... and there it is again....

Dance your cares away. Worry's for another day. Let the music play. Down in Fraggle Rock

Antigoddess (Goddess War #1)

by Kendare Blake

333 Pages (10:28 Hours)

Old Gods never die…

Or so Athena thought. But then the feathers started sprouting beneath her skin, invading her lungs like a strange cancer, and Hermes showed up with a fever eating away his flesh. So much for living a quiet eternity in perpetual health.

Desperately seeking the cause of their slow, miserable deaths, Athena and Hermes travel the world, gathering allies and discovering enemies both new and old. Their search leads them to Cassandra—an ordinary girl who was once an extraordinary prophetess, protected and loved by a god. 

These days, Cassandra doesn’t involve herself in the business of gods—in fact, she doesn’t even know they exist. But she could be the key in a war that is only just beginning. 

Because Hera, the queen of the gods, has aligned herself with other of the ancient Olympians, who are killing off rivals in an attempt to prolong their own lives. But these anti-gods have become corrupted in their desperation to survive, horrific caricatures of their former glory. Athena will need every advantage she can get, because immortals don’t just flicker out. 

Every one of them dies in their own way. Some choke on feathers. Others become monsters. All of them rage against their last breath.

The Goddess War is about to begin.

I picked this book up because I really enjoyed Blake's Three Dark Crown series. But the 3rd one isn't out in audio form yet, si I though I would give this one a go. Like a lot of Urban Fantasy, the first book of the series didn't start out very strong. It's not that it was bad, it just seemed to be ramping up. As in setting the stage for the later books. The Olympians were interesting and I loved reading about them, but Cassandra and her posse were down right boring most of the time. Again, I realize that not much can happen until they find her and get her on their team. I will read the next book for sure, hoping that it will follow the trend of always getting better.

The Young Queens (Three Dark Crowns 0.2)

by Kendare Blake

112 Pages

Three black witches, born to a descending queen. One would rise to become queen in her place. Perhaps the strongest of the three. Perhaps the cleverest. Or perhaps it would be the girl born under the best shield of luck.

Katharine, Arsinoe and Mirabella - three young queens born to fulfil their destiny - to fight to the death to win the crown. But before they were poisoner, elemental and naturalist, they were children, sisters and friends . . .

I find it strange that there seems to be a trend of writing these novellas that fir in between other books. I mean, I get it, but I just find that most of them aren't very good and don't really fill my need of them. This was one such book. It was ripe with possibility, but the mark was totally missed. She could've written the entire thing about Arsinoe's attempted escape from the island, but she just skipped over it entirely. I don't get it. It was okay, and I liked reading about the Black Cottage and the old Queen, but the rest fell flat for me. 

Lumberjanes (Lumberjanes #4)

by Noelle Stevenson, Grace Ellis & Brooke A. Allen

27 Pages

After a lot of convincing, the girls are able to agree to get Jen to take them on a hike. Making their way up to the tower and hoping to finally get some answers, they make their way closer only to be stopped by the neighboring boy camp! April, Mal, Molly, Jo, and Ripley have to figure out how to get to the tower, even if they have to use Jen as a distraction to do it.

Another great comic! I still really love this story line. Sadly this was the last comic I had so I have to go out and get the rest so that I can find out what happens next.

The Emperor and I (The Emperor and I #1)

by Mato

147 Pages

One day something emerges from high school girl Kaho’s refrigerator—an emperor penguin, the largest of all penguins! When this emperor joins the household, fun and wacky antics with family and friends ensue!

When I was a little girl, I used to dream about one day having a pet penguin and all the fun things that we would do together. This comic made me long for those dreams again. I've got to admit, I've been looking a little longer and harder into the fridge every time I open it. Can't wait to read more.

Herding Cats (Sarah's Scribbles #3)

by Sarah Andersen

108 Pages

Adjusting to life as a world-famous cartoonist isn't easy. Terrifying deadlines, piles of junk-food wrappers under a glowing computer screen, and an ever-growing horde of pets....umm, never mind--it's pretty much the same.

With characteristic wit and charm, Sarah Andersen's third collection of comics and illustrated personal essays offers a survival guide for frantic modern life: from the importance of avoiding morning people, to Internet troll defense 101, to the not-so-life-changing futility of tidying up. But when all else fails and the world around you is collapsing, make a hot chocolate, count the days until Halloween, and snuggle up next to your furry beacon of hope.

This book wasn't long enough. I loved it so much and I want it to go on forever. This comic always finds the right spot of funny, sad and relatable that I love so much. I hope she puts out more books in the future.  

The Winter Long (October Daye #8)

by Seanan McGuire

358 Pages

For once, it seems like the Kingdom of the Mists has reached a point of, if not perfection, at least relative peace. Queen Arden Windermere is getting settled on her family's throne; no one's going to war with anyone else; it's almost like everything is going to be okay. Even October "Toby" Daye is starting to relax her constant vigilance, allowing herself to think about the future, and what it might entail.

And then Simon Torquill comes back, and everything begins to fall apart. In Faerie, nothing stays buried forever. No matter how much you might want it to.

After 8 books, I finally thought all of my questions would be answered. Turns out only some of them were. I need more answers! I guess I'll just have to keep reading. Good thing I've got the next book sitting on my shelf just waiting for me. As always, it was hard to put this book down at any time. Usually it was because my eyelids were getting too heavy and I kept reading the same paragraph over and over.

Leia, Princess of Alderaan (Journey to Star Wars)

by Claudia Gray

409 Pages (9:53 Hours)

A LONG TIME AGO IN A GALAXY FAR, FAR AWAY....THERE WAS A PRINCESS WHO BECAME A LEGEND.

Sixteen-year-old Princess Leia Organa faces the most challenging task of her life so far: proving herself in the areas of body, mind, and heart to be formally named heir to the thrown of Alderaan. She's taking rigorous survival courses, practicing politics, and spearheading relief missions to worlds under Imperial control. But Leia has worries beyond her claim to the crown. Her parents, Breha and Bail, aren't acting like themselves lately; they are distant and preoccupied, seemingly more concerned with throwing dinner parties for their allies in the Senate than they are with their own daughter. Determined to uncover her parents' secrets, Leia starts down an increasingly dangerous path that puts her right under the watchful eye of the Empire. And when Leia discovers what her parents and their allies are planning behind closed doors, she finds herself facing what seems like an impossible choice; dedicate herself to the people of Alderaan--including the make she loves--or the galaxy at large, which is in desperate need of a rebel hero.

I wanted this to be amazing. It wasn't. It was still pretty good though. My main concern with it was that Leia didn't feel like Leia. She didn't have that cockiness and temper that makes her who she is. She felt a little more like a generic fantasy heroine in a Star Wars novel. This book is more about her "coming of age" and felt a little young at times. I loved that Amilyn Holdo (aka the kick-ass purple-haired Vice-Admiral from The Last Jedi) was a character in it and that her and Leia were friends, but at times she felt like she was just Luna Lovegood in a different skin.

Books that I am currently reading

A Fine Balance

by Rohinton Mistry

65 of 603 Pages

Ascent of Women

by Sally Armstrong

150 of 320 Pages

The Forbidden Heir (The Four Arts #2)

by M.J. Scott

 155 of 352 Pages

The Mermaid Chair

by Sue Monk Kidd

50 of 368 Pages

[char27martin]

Why I Write Poetry: Walter J. Wojtanik

A few weeks ago, I posted about “Why I Write Poetry” and encouraged others to share their thoughts, stories, and experiences for future guest posts. I’ve already received so many, and I hope they keep coming in. Thank you!

Today’s “Why I Write Poetry” post comes from Walter J. Wojtanik.

Walter J. Wojtanik has made a life of poetry without actually realizing it. Adhering to his premise that inspiration is everywhere we look, it seems those observations have lent themselves to the poetic process. Walter has published three poetry collections and various chapbooks along with the Poet Laureate designation in 2010, and is currently (finally) preparing his I Am Santa Claus collection for publication. Although he is writing in various disciplines, poetry remains his passion.

*****

Master Poetic Forms!

Learn how to write sestina, shadorma, haiku, monotetra, golden shovel, and more with The Writer’s Digest Guide to Poetic Forms, by Robert Lee Brewer.

This e-book covers more than 40 poetic forms and shares examples to illustrate how each form works. Discover a new universe of poetic possibilities and apply it to your poetry today!

Click to continue.

*****

Why I Write Poetry: Walter J. Wojtanik

Walter J. Wojtanik

As long as I can remember, I have tried to express myself in words. I suppose, it started with the stories I would contrive for my youngest sister to keep her entertained. These verbal meanderings never found their way to a page, eventually becoming a vapor of lost thoughts and imaginings. I never considered what I did as “writing.” I was a story teller.

As I got older, my stories took a more serious turn. These finally made it to page, first in my adolescent scribblings and then on the Smith-Corona typewriter my parents had gifted to me one Christmas. My initial attempts were somewhat juvenile and maudlin (for a twelve year old). These pages got filed away, never to see the light of day.

The next great thing my parents did for me came by way of another “gift.” Dad had a mild interest in music. But, for reasons that were never explained, the folks bought a Hammond console organ. It seemed like a confusing piece of furniture with dual keyboards, pedals on the floor, and these sliding drawbars that none of us knew what their function was. My five siblings had no interaction with this monstrosity. I had the fortune of being “charged” with the chore of dusting the beast. Once inadvertently powering the organ up, I ran my hand across the keys and I found myself mesmerized in the fact that I could teach myself to play and I was able to make ”music.”

As my musical acumen grew, I was able to compose pieces that were pleasing to the ear and with the addition of lyrics, I found a new form of expression. At no time did I consider myself a writer, or musician and certainly not a lyricist. At age 13, I barely thought myself a teenager. But I found myself fussing with my words, trying to find the right expressions to speak my soul. The words eventually became more important than the music.

It became a “chicken or egg” thing. Sometimes writing the melody first and penning lyrics to fit the meter and tone. Sometimes I wrote words that just begged for musical accompaniment. Those started to pile up. Then the realization hit me. These weren’t just lyrics, they were poetry. But as always, I never called myself “poet.” But for sure, poetry quickly became “my thing!”

40 years of written words finally found the light of day. Seeing a notice for the 2009 April Poem-a-Day Challenge here at Poetic Asides gave me the forum to write my poetry with great regularity (sometimes to manic extremes.) I found myself contributing to various poetry sites, but always found a home with Robert Lee Brewer’s crew. Being selected by Robert as the Poet Laureate in 2010 was my validation. It became sort of my twelve-step program. P.A. became my A.A. It allowed me to accept my fate and admit to my addiction. Hello, I am Walt and I am a poet!

*****

If you’d like to share why you write poetry, please send an e-mail to robert.brewer@fwmedia.com with a 300-500 word personal essay that shares why you write poetry. It can be serious, happy, sad, silly–whatever poetry means for you. And be sure to include your preferred bio (50-100 words) and head shot. If I like what you send, I’ll include it as a future guest post on the blog.

*****

Find more poetic posts here:

10 Best Poetry Podcasts for Poets.

Cywydd Llosgyrnach: Poetic Form.

Jaswinder Bolina: Poet Interview.

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The post Why I Write Poetry: Walter J. Wojtanik appeared first on WritersDigest.com.

from Writing Editor Blogs – WritersDigest.com http://www.writersdigest.com/whats-new/walter-j-wojtanik

[sanguinesprout]

Uhhhhh... *derp* (More stuff about indecision, some talk about doctors and some blog changes)

Lately has been well... kinda okay but mostly meh. I’ve been flip flopping between feeling somewhat content with myself and a little motivated and feeling absolutely empty inside and distraught. It’s been almost two weeks since my last post here (actually a reblog lol) and I’ve really been wanting to write a post but I’m still stuck in the habit of putting it off until I know for sure what I want to write or have the privacy to do so. Or maybe it’s just me being a big scaredy cat again :< I think from now on I’ll try to just write as if I’m writing in a diary, so more spontaneous and with less worrying about structure/keeping to just one topic or whether someone reads it or not, as I’m doing this for myself and my benefit most.

Although I was dawdling I did however sort out quite a lot of stuff to do with the blog and some good stuff irl (which I’ll get to later or in another post). One of the main things to mention is that I switched this blog from my primary one to a side one, which does make more sense and makes me feel a bit more at ease which should make it a bit easier to write and post without the restraint I was feeling before. Whether to keep them linked or not idk, I feel uneasy about it but I don’t think it should matter, I mean it is still me on both blogs and everything. I just wanted to separate the huge blocks of serious emotional text from the random cutesy and silly stuff I also wanted to post, but I think I might still post mental health related things to my main one, just in the form of images and not essays like these lol. 

Also I changed the urls from the hyphenated and maybe overly fancy termed things they were previously to more simple and cute ones. I still feel a lil iffy about them (like this blog url feels a bit ‘cold’ but looks pretty and flows well while my main one sounds more ‘warm’ but the world cuddly doesn’t flow well or look as nice lol) but whatever I’ll grow to like them or just change them again whenever, I spent way too much time agonising over them, it’s time to move on! I fixed up the about pages on both of them too, the links and tags pages are still empty for now, but I’m content enough with the way they are now to actually begin posting properly soon I hope. Oh and the current avatar/sidebar image is a really crappy drawing I made 2-3 years ago with a mouse when I was feeling down and was going to make and name this blog ‘rainysnail’ lol. I still might use that name/url someday for something though ^^

I searched for ‘extreme indecisiveness’ in google the other day because I was that frustrated with myself about well, being indecisive (and it was over the same lame url/blog stuff as before, not surprise surprise). I know there’s a lot of stigma around consulting ‘Dr.Google’ and self diagnosis being looked down on as it could prove to be more harmful in some cases and I won’t lie, I do get kinda hypochondriac-ish sometimes, but sometimes it can be very educational and helpful too. I just wanted to know if I was feeling something... something valid(?) or if I was just being an idiot. 

I came across ‘Aboulomania’ on my indecisiveness search and wow, it sounds pretty similar to AVPD and my current feelings but the way it’s written is kinda heavier? (and hella typo-ey/engrish-y lol I just chose that one because it seemed to have the most info from the few I clicked on). Idk... it doesn’t seem to be as much of a known/legit thing so there doesn’t seem to be that many sources on it or at least any reputable ones (though I didn't look particularly hard or for a long time though but once you’re past page 2 on google everything is bleh anyways lol). Also on its definition here lol it talks about ‘analysis paralysis’ and that’s something I kinda knew of and struggle with already. I feel some resonance with this finding and feel a little more assured and saddened at the same time, but I’m not about to run around screaming I have this thing or anything. Maybe I’ll look into it more another time but right now I kinda don’t have the energy to .__.

Indecision is something that appears and could be caused by all sorts of disorders, even just depression alone or a whole mix of other things and factors. Many disorders overlap (like the stuff in cluster c which I feel are most relevant to me) and trying to pinpoint exact reasons and causes for things to do with mental health is near impossible, so I don’t wanna dwell on it. I have therapy soon so having a professional help work out things is a much better idea (unless they also consult Dr.Google like some of the stories I’ve read online lol).

I did see some snippets of advice on indecision on another page and it was basically to let go of the feeling to try and always be perfect/choose the definitive ‘right’ decision and to just trust your gut feelings instead of leaving yourself to stress over it. Yeah, it’s nothing new really and I have been trying to do this but sometimes it’s just so difficult with all these automatic negative feelings weighing my rationality down and sometimes I forget because it’s so hard wired into me to get anxious and over analytical. *Sigh* ...but if I keep reminding myself I think it will stick more in the end. I have already adopted the ‘it doesn’t hurt to try’, ‘just do it, ‘yolo’, ‘no1curr’ etc. kind of mindset/mantra when I get hesitant before doing something that I usually avoid lol, sometimes it fails but the times when I have been brave and not overthought or avoided I’ve felt kinda proud of myself and there were some positive-ish outcomes too. So I just need to continue and allow myself to grow stronger in mind and spirit (and hopefully body too).

In relation to what I said before about the whole ‘Dr.Google’ thing, I thought maybe take the time now to write about my experiences with doctors in general. Many times in the past and even now when I would be explaining my problem (whether physical or mental) to a doctor, they would just shake their head and scoff to them self or even outright laugh smugly and then dismiss it straight away (especially if I mentioned I read something on the internet). The feeling of being fobbed off and even ridiculed by someone that’s supposed to be helping didn’t fare well on my confidence at all and I feel it is a reason I wasn’t proactive in sorting out a lot of the problems I’m still dealing with and obviously I am regretful, maddened and saddened as many of them could have been avoided or alleviated better if they were dealt with sooner.

I’m not saying all doctors are like this, I think it was those particular doctors that were the problem and thank goodness I don’t have to choose to see them anymore (I hope). My current doctor (who I actually came across due to those mean doctors being unavailable one time) is worlds apart in the way he handles things. He is so kind and accommodating to start with, listens well to any concerns, addresses them with great care and reassurance and is very adept at scheduling appointments for further investigations. I feel he really goes above and beyond and has both a friendly and personal but professional demeanour. I mean he isn’t 100% godly perfect as there were times I felt a bit iffy with some of the explanations and prescriptions and sometimes things were delayed, but he does try hard to help and is not against reading information from the internet and in fact encourages it and utilises it himself (eg. printing a informational page on a certain health thing from a reliable health website).

When I presented some info and concerns relating to a health problem I was having investigated already but felt was going in the wrong direction (ie. going down the typical ‘fob you off with the most common explanation so you go away’ route) he explained that it’s the typical process to go for the most common things first when investigating and agreed another route of investigation would be beneficial, more relevant and time efficient so he arranged that too. This doctor is such an awesome and good natured person and I’m so grateful, but he may only be temporary at the place I go to however and it makes me sad to think I might end up with the mean kind again someday. But the lesson is to not settle on doctors that are not helpful or any other type of awful and that there are good people out there. Something that was really very prominent and touching about going to this doctor is that my mother and sister who go with me sometimes were also stunned by how nice and helpful he’s been.

I distinctly remember one of the first times I went to see him with my mum and at that point I had been ill for so long already and she was obviously very worried about me. At the end of the appointment he announced what he would recommend me for investigation and assured that he’d help me get better soon with a smile and then he pointed to my mum next to me who I wasn’t facing at the time and I can’t remember exactly what he said but it was something about my mum crying. When I turned to look, she was indeed crying and I couldn’t stop my own eyes from watering either. I have never ever EVER seen my mum cry before, so it shocked me a lot and made me emotional too. I mean my sister told me she did cry one time recently, but that was when she was so stressed and upset over a family matter on her side of the family :c It’s not like this is something on my bucket list or anything, because I would rather her never be upset or cry for a bad reason, but this showed how much she cares and worries for me and in this case she was crying because she was happy, relieved that she would possibly not have to see me suffer as much and was moved to tears.

Unfortunately the problems have still not been resolved or fully recognised yet, and recently one of the doctors recommended to help investigate fobbed me off and it feels bleh lol... no not lol... very un-lol :< But at least the investigation is still going further in some way I guess and I’ll take his words with a grain of salt, I’ve yet to see my regular doctor to discuss what happens next. I think I’ve just backed down and passively taken whatever explanations too much in the past with negative results or progress and Idk I have a hard time accepting things some doctors say nowadays, a lot of it seems contradictory, sometimes illogical or outdated, robotic, insincere etc. 

When I’m reading what I’ve just written it keeps making me worried I’m a ass or have trust issues or something... :< I know doctors are meant to be serious and professional, but I can’t shake the feeling that some of them are not nice/unwilling to help as much as they could. I have had so many past experiences to do with being treated differently and being prejudiced against and it still happens today and not just to me but all of my family members, it’s tough and really upsetting... :c

It is true though, that you really have to push and persist if you want something done about a problem, and many times people are let go and misdiagnosed with stuff that ends up being something different or a lot more serious. I’m not saying whatever I have is ultra serious and I wouldn’t know anyways. I am clearly not dying, and I hope I’m not, but when I was without medication at the beginning I felt so bad and I was so scared of dying (even though usually idgaf thanks to depression etc.) I’m scared of being in pain and having to suffer both physically and mentally forever. I want to get better, become a stronger person. do the things that matter and well, in a nutshell live my life to the fullest.

Anyways, about the app with the normal doctor... I avoided phoning on a day I could’ve gotten a sooner appointment (my sister encouraged me to, but she was away that day and my mum said it was an inconvenient day to go, but it actually wasn’t really... I should I have pushed myself to go forward even so...) the appointment I do have is 2 weeks away from what it could’ve been. But I guess maybe someone else might have taken that appointment that needed it more urgently, or there might not have been any available that day anyways w/e. Avoidance playing up again... be more brave silly self!

I was planning to write some more happier stuff that’s been going but this post is already quite long so a separate post it is~ and I won’t keep putting it off! Tbh I’m only comfortable pulling up my blog and writing my feels whenever I am alone, so when my family are all at work, but this only occurs on random days and for such a short span of time. Or at least when I know they are all busy downstairs, I can try but I feel like I have to be extra alert and switch it away when they do come. I... ugh idk :c I don’t want to be secretive or feel guilty but I can’t help it, it’s just so hard and frustrating. I can’t even write what illnesses I was talking about earlier on (though I do hope to dedicate whole posts to writing about them later). I will improve and forgo this paranoid feeling someday though! Believe it! *cringe*

[nicolelearnstorun]

23 - 100 Days of Recovery

I usually like to sit down on Sunday evenings and see if there's reflecting to be had. But this week I didn't and I didn't on purpose. I knew I would tonight and I knew today was going to be a big day for me emotionally, so I put it off.

100 days ago I made a simple commitment.

It was personal and I kept it (mostly) to myself. I decided that no matter what happened from there (February 6, 2017) I would abstain from emotional and binge eating. I wrote myself what turns out to be quite an emotional letter,  "Dear future Nicole" that I struggle to read today, mostly because the Nicole 100 days ago was scared, unsure of herself and craved self love more than anything else. Nicole 100 days ago didn't know what she was fully capable of and used phrases like "preparing for battle". She didn't know she was going to make it through one full day of what she would later learn to call recovery, let alone 100 days.

On a daily basis all of this seems easy now. "Easy" is a funny word to use, honestly. The practices I've put in place have become so routine for me that it has become second nature. I'm not naive, trust me, I understand what relapse means and I understand that it can happen to me. But I'm so deep in this fight now, I am committed to only going forward.  I have plans in place if I need them, and I choose not to focus there, on the what happens ifs..., instead I choose to focus on each day, every day, one day at a time.

Some of the finer points that have helped get me through to day 100 include and probably aren't limited to:

"Fat is a symptom of our illness... But in order to get well we need to admit we are sick." (p.3). I gave it a shot and I gave in. It was easy because I was tired of living in such despair. The hardest part initially was admitting, without proper diagnosis, that I have an eating disorder (ED). I struggled with finding the proper vocabulary to describe what I was going through. But 100 days into the self-treatment of an ED it becomes very clear that with professional diagnosis or not, with the success that has come from treating an ED, that I clearly have an ED.  These two points, I feel the need to mention, were on the first 3 pages of the first book I'd picked up on ED in years. Everything was starting to speak to me and it was written about the exact issues I was facing. FINALLY.

By page 12 I had already found my new mantra. "One step at a time; one day at a time". In all absolute seriousness, every single day I remind myself of this and this one simple phrase gets me through each and every day. It started on that first day, by just getting through day one, and the feeling of accomplishment that went along with finally getting through one day binge-free. I tried to repeat the next day when it came, was successful, and then woke up and moved on to day 3. Stringing 100 of those days together has brought about some serious changes. The fat, the symptom the this illness, is shrinking through the treatment of an ED. All because I take life one day at a time.

I learned that although I found the idea of the traditional Christian God to go against everything I believed in Science-wise, I realized that I did indeed believe in a force greater than myself that would "provide the strength" I needed to remain in recovery. I gave up on the idea that I really had any control and handed it over to the universe.  I firmly believe that the universe has my back. It sounds silly, I understand this as I'm writing it out. But it's what's worked for me and that all that I really need to know. "One doesn't have to understand how electricity works in order to use it" (p. 23). I began to fully understand that even though "god" didn't exist for me, I wasn't actually alone with this struggle.

I learned to live solely in the present. That the past was something that was done and over and there was nothing I could do to change it. I stopped worrying about the future because I had shifted my focus onto today, one day at a time. The idea of remaining abstinent from emotional and BE for the rest of my life seemed rather daunting at first. But the idea of remaining abstinent for one day at a time really made a huge difference in my attitude. It really freed me. "The only way to be free is to go along with the Power that governs the universe... When my will is in harmony with the will of this Higher Power, I am free to be who I really am and do what I am supposed to do" (p. 31). And that is exactly what has happened.

There is far more work that I have done - far more readings and assignments and research but those few basic points are the sturdy foundation of my recovery. I decided to share my journey through this blog and one day finally found enough courage to put it out there for the world. Being honest with family and friends has been liberating - I hadn't known the weight of it until it had lifted. I'm still working on being honest with people - most days I have at least one conversation that begins with "Nicole, you've lost weight! What are you doing?" and I take a breath and smile and say "drinking a whole lotta water and tracking what I'm eating while being active" when all I really actually want to say is "Thanks, I'm in recovery from an ED". I strive for this blatant honesty. I will get there. Because it really is important to talk about eating disorders and mental health - even if it's going to make some people uncomfortable, because it's the truth. It's my truth. Yes, I'm tracking what I'm eating to be mindful about where my calories come from. Yes, I'm tracking how much water I drink in the run of a day because it's clear to me that that's one thing I can focus on day in and day out, and yes, I'm being more active because it resets my mind and makes me feel good. I'm not lying - but I am avoiding the full truth. It's a level of transparency I strive for.

I've lost weight. I've lost an incredible amount of weight. It has been a lovely side effect of treating BED. But I don't stress over it. I weight myself weekly because one of my programs asks for it. I know that when I plateau (I have, multiple times over the past 100 days) that there's really no need to worry or stress over it because weight loss isn't my primary goal. My primary goal each and every single day is abstinence. My secondary goal is 120oz of water daily. My tertiary goal is 4 of 7 days worth of whatever activity I like (yoga/walking). And that's it. I'm sure you'll hear about it when I hit100lbs of fat loss. But aside from that I'm probably never going to write about a number when it comes to my weight - and that's a very important thing for me because it shows me just how far I've really come. The important thing here is the abstinence, not the number on the scale.

I'm hopeful and excited and energetic. There's a bounce to my step that hasn't been there for a while. I learned that I used food to numb my emotions - the ones of shame, worthlessness and hopelessness. I learned that one cannot selectively numb emotions. You numb the sadness and you numb the joy. Life is now lived daily, in full gratitude for getting that joy back. For taking my life back.

Today’s a fantastic day.

[sweetlifetownsville]

It's A Bugger ...But Maybe A Blessing, Too. Do We Need To Clean Up More Than The Mud And Mould?

The deliberate managed flooding of Townsville should be the catalyst for a far-ranging review of how we do things in this city and maybe the way forward is to know how we should not have done them before. Are we entering the phase of the faceless spokesman? Seems so, as Mayor Mullet suddenly refuses to comment on some matters. The floodwaters might have receded but some leeches are still hanging around firmly plonking their suckers on the public tit one exponent of the big suck is particularly prominent or has Shayne Sutton departed our company? and never the twain should meet its not just the Astonisher having problems with keeping the wrong ads away from the wrong story one of Britains more respected papers has dropped a complete clanger Plus your regular illustrated Trump gallery But first Damned If Adani Do, Damned If Adani Dont The Pies favorite acid-tongued columnist, the Guardians Marina Hyde dropped a wonderful line the other day, and while she was referring hopeless and hapless British conservatives, it is so apt for our Queensland goofarium in George Street, The Pie will borrow it the Palaszczuk Government is like a gif of someone lighting their own fart and then being consumed by the fireball. Jackie Treacherous Trad has the box of matches, and our premier is the one whos been chugging down the vindaloo and frothy XXXX, or should that be Adani Ale. Adding to the fireball was Queensland Resources Investment Commissioner Caoilin Chestnutt, who became a roasting chestnut when she described the Black Throated Finch controversy as an absolute mess which would delay any subsequent approval of the Carmichael mine by between six months to two years. That was a bit rich of her, considering she was talking in New Delhi, in a country which knows a fair bit about messes in politics and social ethics. But those critical of what they see as a cynical and dishonest delay are particularly incensed that arch-Greenie Associate Professor Brendan Wintle has been driving the review they see that as akin to having, say, Clive Palmer being out in charge of an inquiry whether chocolate doughnuts should be outlawed. But Bentleys on to the nutty professors game, who seems to have taken a page out of the hunting with hawks manual.

Still Searching For Icebergs

The mans sensitivity and sense of timing (not to mention decency) was on full display at the Casino ballroom a few nights ago, when Clive Palmer hosted a lavish dinner promoting his unicorn plan to build a replica of Titanic. This affair had a feel of as Rome burns, being staged just as the devastating extent of the flood disaster was becoming fully apparent. Clive seems fatally attracted to things that have been destroyed by natural disasters dinosaurs, the Titantic, but the cynical Yabulu disaster was all his own doing but his only nod on the night towards the immense local disaster was a pledge of $100,000 to help fund any class action against insurers that may emerge from a flood inquiry. Very handsome of the man willing to splurge $500million on a wild whim. But the bombast didnt finish on the night. A day or two later, Palmer called for the TCC to be put into administration and the mayor sacked, because of her handling of the flood disaster. While that scenario has been put in this blog and elsewhere as a question to be answered, it hasnt been asserted as a fact, until Clive came along. The response was predictable, but what was interesting was that although a subsequent headline said Mayor Hill Rejects Palmers Claim, the funny thing is she didnt. In fact, as far as The Pie has heard, she hasnt said tickety boo about his attack, and about claims from others that shes going to have to carry the can on this one. Instead, all of sudden, the mayor went all media shy and we got this

Now, all that be as it may, the thing that caught the beady eye were the words a council spokesman. That phrase has been as rare as rocking horse shit ever since former editor Mick Carroll ten years ago ruled that all such spokespeople needed to supply a name and position, no anonymity. (Dolan Hayes went thermonuclear over that one, but he lost anyway.)

So now it seems the council, via a faceless, nameless spokesman (they probably rolled out the rapidly expanding Tony Bligh of the Legal Dept) as an organisation is pre-judging any official findings about what role the mayor played in the deliberate flooding of hundreds of Townsville ratepayers homes. Something to be learned there, Jenna Cairney .. as Mick Carroll said all those years ago, if there is no name and position to go with statements, whats to stop people thinking the paper just made it up. And that is far more relevant now than when Mick was in charge. It Looks Like Its A Whole New And Overdue Ball Game For Townsville A trusted correspondent on this blog we know as Memory Man has offered many intelligent insights here. During the week, he sent in this story from the Guardian

and attached these comments. This stuff is actually serious, and requires very careful consideration. Simplistic fluff from the likes of Col Dwyer about the poor old North not getting its fair share doesnt address the underlying drivers of risk / mitigation that frame the market for regional insurance. I know talking to colleagues in the global insurance market that cutting out a middle man or two would reduce premiums by about 10% straight away. This means going directly to the underwriters. Only a local authority-backed insurance operation can do this. The Gold Coast City Council did this some years ago. The flip side is also risk mitigation. In part this means making sure the right things are built in the right places. This is easier said than done, because the right things is a function of a minimal specification, which in turn is driven by a given assessment of risk and impact magnitude. Now, the rule has been to build to a 1-in-100 year event impact. This isnt as silly as it sounds. Folk whove derided it as a meaningless measure because such levels have occurred more than once in the past 100 years miss the point of of probability. The reason why the measure is relevant is that it also goes to balancing out the costs of building the right thing versus the probable costs of loss (or replacement). Over-engineering is costly to build, and in many cases also unnecessary. Societies accept that there are some things that can be built to a lesser standard, and other things need to be built to a higher standard. Thats what the public debate should be focused on. Critical infrastructure should be built to a higher standard; things that are more easily replaced can be built to a lower standard. Additionally, everyone needs to recognise that the probability of severe events occurring is increasing (as well as the severity of events themselves). So, what would be described presently as a 1-in-100 may be better understood as a 1-in-75, for sake of argument. It also means that so-called 1-in-500 events may have a greater probability of occurring in the future than was the case in the past. So a revision of probability estimates to say, 1-in-400, may be necessary. Bottom line though is that all asset owners need to take proactive decisions to ensure their assets are built to such as level as warranted by the owners own assessment of the trade-off between cost to build today versus value of loss + cost to replace. Where there is a social cost, this externality needs to be added to the equation. The lesson is severe weather is more likely but this shouldnt be a reason to stop things being developed. It simply means being clearer about the right things being built in the right places, with trade-off risks being clear to those concerned especially when it involves public implications. A well debated argument, and The Magpie believes that new infrastructure rules about flood plain developments require urgent review. Chronic Cronyism: It Really Has Got To Stop The massive upheaval at executive level in the council has given us a glimpse of the outrageously blatant jobs for the boys and girls culture that the likes of Mooney (himself a beneficiary of the rort) and the mayor make little effort to hide nowadays. A very good case in point is this woman

Shayne Sutton, who is also the wife of Stephen The Screaming Midget Beckett, the lately punted Mayoral shouter at staff and ratepayers. It is not surprising that the council became stacked with imported Labor odd jobbers with questionable qualifications once Mayor Jenny Hills poisonous report commissioned from the Nous group in Melbourne was adopted by council, but Ms Sutton has added a new dimension in the grandest let them eat cake style. The Labor old mates club could not be shielded from view when Mrs Beckett arrived in town, following hubby north after the Qld Labor Party decided because of his bad manners, bad temper and bad judgements were not appreciated in the corridors of central power in Brisbane. Shayne Sutton has been a Brisbane City Councillors for 14 years when they upped sticks for Townsville. But she hadnt been here five minutes it seemed when she landed a plum $44k p.a spot on Tony Mooneys Townsville Hospital Board this has been reported here more than once. Seems mr Mooney just couldnt find any involved local suitable to his requirements. But what The Pie has just been made aware of is as well as handling that onerous hospital task (less than 6 meetings a year), Ms Sutton was a few weeks later tapped on the shoulder by Mayor Mullet for a newly created, totally bullshit position as wait for it the Executive Director of the North Queensland Regional Organisations of Councils (NQROC). The what, you cry? Well, this

Gosh, that must take a bit of doing, you wonder. Sure does, as the job description attests. The executive Director draws on her deep knowledge of the region, its history and its priorities and Provides strategic advocacy and engagement advice to five North Queensland Mayors and CEOs Facilitates regional collaboration between key internal and external stakeholders to progress agreedstrategic priorities for North Queensland Media management Organisational governance and financial reporting This is a made-up position that in fact didnt exist before, and at a guess since the kings of featherbedding the LGAQ are involved probably commanded a salary of around $70-80K. Gee, well, you say, shed have her hands as well as her purse full maybe, but not so much that didnt apply for a job the board of TAFE as well. Dont known how that went, and maybe well never know the full extent of Ms Suttons contribution to a community in which she has lived for barely a year. But this murky NQROC position seems to have been suddenly de-created as far as one can penetrate the layers of obscurity around these goings on, so perhaps she is on her way. Madam, you are a massive leech and our already benighted community can hardly mourn it if you pass on from our midst to infest some other poor bastards treasury. Making The Best Use Of Your Townsville Bulletin This latest in the series of cringe-worthy self-promotions caught The Magpie eye on Friday.

And good on you Freda, you really do look a very sprightly lady. May The Pie add his hearty congratulations on a milestone hell probably not even get within cooee of. And reading your story, mdear, the old bird now perhaps knows the secret of your wonderful longevity you gave a hint when you said your daily dose of news from the Bulletin was what set me up for a good day. Its part of ones everyday routine and I just cant get on without it. Its the first thing I need in the morning. Indeed, Freda. As it does for so many others, probably works better than prunes and porridge at a guess, youd be getting on by page 3 most days. Guess She Finally Came Out Of The Closet Seems the layout blokes at the Scottish Herald had a wee dram too many when they put this page together but then again, it may just have been the world renowned Scottish sense of humour. Eh, Jenna?

New Aussie Tennis Rankings .. Just released

And The Week In Trumpistan

It has come to our attention that too many of you are paying attention. The New Yorker

.. Back again next week, Allah willing, but have your say 24/7 on blog comments, plenty of frisky opinion out there along with information you wont get anywhere else (that is, until the Astonisher trolls have read the blog Mt Isa railway crisis two weeks after the Nest, anyone?) Hope you enjoy what you read here, and any support for the Magpies Nest will be greatly appreciated, the how to donate button is below. http://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/its-a-bugger-but-maybe-a-blessing-too-do-we-need-to-clean-up-more-than-the-mud-and-mould/

[sweetlifetownsville]

It's A Bugger ...But Maybe A Blessing, Too. Do We Need To Clean Up More Than The Mud And Mould?

The deliberate managed flooding of Townsville should be the catalyst for a far-ranging review of how we do things in this city and maybe the way forward is to know how we should not have done them before. Are we entering the phase of the faceless spokesman? Seems so, as Mayor Mullet suddenly refuses to comment on some matters. The floodwaters might have receded but some leeches are still hanging around firmly plonking their suckers on the public tit one exponent of the big suck is particularly prominent or has Shayne Sutton departed our company? and never the twain should meet its not just the Astonisher having problems with keeping the wrong ads away from the wrong story one of Britains more respected papers has dropped a complete clanger Plus your regular illustrated Trump gallery But first Damned If Adani Do, Damned If Adani Dont The Pies favorite acid-tongued columnist, the Guardians Marina Hyde dropped a wonderful line the other day, and while she was referring hopeless and hapless British conservatives, it is so apt for our Queensland goofarium in George Street, The Pie will borrow it the Palaszczuk Government is like a gif of someone lighting their own fart and then being consumed by the fireball. Jackie Treacherous Trad has the box of matches, and our premier is the one whos been chugging down the vindaloo and frothy XXXX, or should that be Adani Ale. Adding to the fireball was Queensland Resources Investment Commissioner Caoilin Chestnutt, who became a roasting chestnut when she described the Black Throated Finch controversy as an absolute mess which would delay any subsequent approval of the Carmichael mine by between six months to two years. That was a bit rich of her, considering she was talking in New Delhi, in a country which knows a fair bit about messes in politics and social ethics. But those critical of what they see as a cynical and dishonest delay are particularly incensed that arch-Greenie Associate Professor Brendan Wintle has been driving the review they see that as akin to having, say, Clive Palmer being out in charge of an inquiry whether chocolate doughnuts should be outlawed. But Bentleys on to the nutty professors game, who seems to have taken a page out of the hunting with hawks manual.

Still Searching For Icebergs

The mans sensitivity and sense of timing (not to mention decency) was on full display at the Casino ballroom a few nights ago, when Clive Palmer hosted a lavish dinner promoting his unicorn plan to build a replica of Titanic. This affair had a feel of as Rome burns, being staged just as the devastating extent of the flood disaster was becoming fully apparent. Clive seems fatally attracted to things that have been destroyed by natural disasters dinosaurs, the Titantic, but the cynical Yabulu disaster was all his own doing but his only nod on the night towards the immense local disaster was a pledge of $100,000 to help fund any class action against insurers that may emerge from a flood inquiry. Very handsome of the man willing to splurge $500million on a wild whim. But the bombast didnt finish on the night. A day or two later, Palmer called for the TCC to be put into administration and the mayor sacked, because of her handling of the flood disaster. While that scenario has been put in this blog and elsewhere as a question to be answered, it hasnt been asserted as a fact, until Clive came along. The response was predictable, but what was interesting was that although a subsequent headline said Mayor Hill Rejects Palmers Claim, the funny thing is she didnt. In fact, as far as The Pie has heard, she hasnt said tickety boo about his attack, and about claims from others that shes going to have to carry the can on this one. Instead, all of sudden, the mayor went all media shy and we got this

Now, all that be as it may, the thing that caught the beady eye were the words a council spokesman. That phrase has been as rare as rocking horse shit ever since former editor Mick Carroll ten years ago ruled that all such spokespeople needed to supply a name and position, no anonymity. (Dolan Hayes went thermonuclear over that one, but he lost anyway.)

So now it seems the council, via a faceless, nameless spokesman (they probably rolled out the rapidly expanding Tony Bligh of the Legal Dept) as an organisation is pre-judging any official findings about what role the mayor played in the deliberate flooding of hundreds of Townsville ratepayers homes. Something to be learned there, Jenna Cairney .. as Mick Carroll said all those years ago, if there is no name and position to go with statements, whats to stop people thinking the paper just made it up. And that is far more relevant now than when Mick was in charge. It Looks Like Its A Whole New And Overdue Ball Game For Townsville A trusted correspondent on this blog we know as Memory Man has offered many intelligent insights here. During the week, he sent in this story from the Guardian

and attached these comments. This stuff is actually serious, and requires very careful consideration. Simplistic fluff from the likes of Col Dwyer about the poor old North not getting its fair share doesnt address the underlying drivers of risk / mitigation that frame the market for regional insurance. I know talking to colleagues in the global insurance market that cutting out a middle man or two would reduce premiums by about 10% straight away. This means going directly to the underwriters. Only a local authority-backed insurance operation can do this. The Gold Coast City Council did this some years ago. The flip side is also risk mitigation. In part this means making sure the right things are built in the right places. This is easier said than done, because the right things is a function of a minimal specification, which in turn is driven by a given assessment of risk and impact magnitude. Now, the rule has been to build to a 1-in-100 year event impact. This isnt as silly as it sounds. Folk whove derided it as a meaningless measure because such levels have occurred more than once in the past 100 years miss the point of of probability. The reason why the measure is relevant is that it also goes to balancing out the costs of building the right thing versus the probable costs of loss (or replacement). Over-engineering is costly to build, and in many cases also unnecessary. Societies accept that there are some things that can be built to a lesser standard, and other things need to be built to a higher standard. Thats what the public debate should be focused on. Critical infrastructure should be built to a higher standard; things that are more easily replaced can be built to a lower standard. Additionally, everyone needs to recognise that the probability of severe events occurring is increasing (as well as the severity of events themselves). So, what would be described presently as a 1-in-100 may be better understood as a 1-in-75, for sake of argument. It also means that so-called 1-in-500 events may have a greater probability of occurring in the future than was the case in the past. So a revision of probability estimates to say, 1-in-400, may be necessary. Bottom line though is that all asset owners need to take proactive decisions to ensure their assets are built to such as level as warranted by the owners own assessment of the trade-off between cost to build today versus value of loss + cost to replace. Where there is a social cost, this externality needs to be added to the equation. The lesson is severe weather is more likely but this shouldnt be a reason to stop things being developed. It simply means being clearer about the right things being built in the right places, with trade-off risks being clear to those concerned especially when it involves public implications. A well debated argument, and The Magpie believes that new infrastructure rules about flood plain developments require urgent review. Chronic Cronyism: It Really Has Got To Stop The massive upheaval at executive level in the council has given us a glimpse of the outrageously blatant jobs for the boys and girls culture that the likes of Mooney (himself a beneficiary of the rort) and the mayor make little effort to hide nowadays. A very good case in point is this woman

Shayne Sutton, who is also the wife of Stephen The Screaming Midget Beckett, the lately punted Mayoral shouter at staff and ratepayers. It is not surprising that the council became stacked with imported Labor odd jobbers with questionable qualifications once Mayor Jenny Hills poisonous report commissioned from the Nous group in Melbourne was adopted by council, but Ms Sutton has added a new dimension in the grandest let them eat cake style. The Labor old mates club could not be shielded from view when Mrs Beckett arrived in town, following hubby north after the Qld Labor Party decided because of his bad manners, bad temper and bad judgements were not appreciated in the corridors of central power in Brisbane. Shayne Sutton has been a Brisbane City Councillors for 14 years when they upped sticks for Townsville. But she hadnt been here five minutes it seemed when she landed a plum $44k p.a spot on Tony Mooneys Townsville Hospital Board this has been reported here more than once. Seems mr Mooney just couldnt find any involved local suitable to his requirements. But what The Pie has just been made aware of is as well as handling that onerous hospital task (less than 6 meetings a year), Ms Sutton was a few weeks later tapped on the shoulder by Mayor Mullet for a newly created, totally bullshit position as wait for it the Executive Director of the North Queensland Regional Organisations of Councils (NQROC). The what, you cry? Well, this

Gosh, that must take a bit of doing, you wonder. Sure does, as the job description attests. The executive Director draws on her deep knowledge of the region, its history and its priorities and Provides strategic advocacy and engagement advice to five North Queensland Mayors and CEOs Facilitates regional collaboration between key internal and external stakeholders to progress agreedstrategic priorities for North Queensland Media management Organisational governance and financial reporting This is a made-up position that in fact didnt exist before, and at a guess since the kings of featherbedding the LGAQ are involved probably commanded a salary of around $70-80K. Gee, well, you say, shed have her hands as well as her purse full maybe, but not so much that didnt apply for a job the board of TAFE as well. Dont known how that went, and maybe well never know the full extent of Ms Suttons contribution to a community in which she has lived for barely a year. But this murky NQROC position seems to have been suddenly de-created as far as one can penetrate the layers of obscurity around these goings on, so perhaps she is on her way. Madam, you are a massive leech and our already benighted community can hardly mourn it if you pass on from our midst to infest some other poor bastards treasury. Making The Best Use Of Your Townsville Bulletin This latest in the series of cringe-worthy self-promotions caught The Magpie eye on Friday.

And good on you Freda, you really do look a very sprightly lady. May The Pie add his hearty congratulations on a milestone hell probably not even get within cooee of. And reading your story, mdear, the old bird now perhaps knows the secret of your wonderful longevity you gave a hint when you said your daily dose of news from the Bulletin was what set me up for a good day. Its part of ones everyday routine and I just cant get on without it. Its the first thing I need in the morning. Indeed, Freda. As it does for so many others, probably works better than prunes and porridge at a guess, youd be getting on by page 3 most days. Guess She Finally Came Out Of The Closet Seems the layout blokes at the Scottish Herald had a wee dram too many when they put this page together but then again, it may just have been the world renowned Scottish sense of humour. Eh, Jenna?

New Aussie Tennis Rankings .. Just released

And The Week In Trumpistan

It has come to our attention that too many of you are paying attention. The New Yorker

.. Back again next week, Allah willing, but have your say 24/7 on blog comments, plenty of frisky opinion out there along with information you wont get anywhere else (that is, until the Astonisher trolls have read the blog Mt Isa railway crisis two weeks after the Nest, anyone?) Hope you enjoy what you read here, and any support for the Magpies Nest will be greatly appreciated, the how to donate button is below. http://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/its-a-bugger-but-maybe-a-blessing-too-do-we-need-to-clean-up-more-than-the-mud-and-mould/

[sweetlifetownsville]

It's A Bugger ...But Maybe A Blessing, Too. Do We Need To Clean Up More Than The Mud And Mould?

The deliberate managed flooding of Townsville should be the catalyst for a far-ranging review of how we do things in this city and maybe the way forward is to know how we should not have done them before. Are we entering the phase of the faceless spokesman? Seems so, as Mayor Mullet suddenly refuses to comment on some matters. The floodwaters might have receded but some leeches are still hanging around firmly plonking their suckers on the public tit one exponent of the big suck is particularly prominent or has Shayne Sutton departed our company? and never the twain should meet its not just the Astonisher having problems with keeping the wrong ads away from the wrong story one of Britains more respected papers has dropped a complete clanger Plus your regular illustrated Trump gallery But first Damned If Adani Do, Damned If Adani Dont The Pies favorite acid-tongued columnist, the Guardians Marina Hyde dropped a wonderful line the other day, and while she was referring hopeless and hapless British conservatives, it is so apt for our Queensland goofarium in George Street, The Pie will borrow it the Palaszczuk Government is like a gif of someone lighting their own fart and then being consumed by the fireball. Jackie Treacherous Trad has the box of matches, and our premier is the one whos been chugging down the vindaloo and frothy XXXX, or should that be Adani Ale. Adding to the fireball was Queensland Resources Investment Commissioner Caoilin Chestnutt, who became a roasting chestnut when she described the Black Throated Finch controversy as an absolute mess which would delay any subsequent approval of the Carmichael mine by between six months to two years. That was a bit rich of her, considering she was talking in New Delhi, in a country which knows a fair bit about messes in politics and social ethics. But those critical of what they see as a cynical and dishonest delay are particularly incensed that arch-Greenie Associate Professor Brendan Wintle has been driving the review they see that as akin to having, say, Clive Palmer being out in charge of an inquiry whether chocolate doughnuts should be outlawed. But Bentleys on to the nutty professors game, who seems to have taken a page out of the hunting with hawks manual.

Still Searching For Icebergs

The mans sensitivity and sense of timing (not to mention decency) was on full display at the Casino ballroom a few nights ago, when Clive Palmer hosted a lavish dinner promoting his unicorn plan to build a replica of Titanic. This affair had a feel of as Rome burns, being staged just as the devastating extent of the flood disaster was becoming fully apparent. Clive seems fatally attracted to things that have been destroyed by natural disasters dinosaurs, the Titantic, but the cynical Yabulu disaster was all his own doing but his only nod on the night towards the immense local disaster was a pledge of $100,000 to help fund any class action against insurers that may emerge from a flood inquiry. Very handsome of the man willing to splurge $500million on a wild whim. But the bombast didnt finish on the night. A day or two later, Palmer called for the TCC to be put into administration and the mayor sacked, because of her handling of the flood disaster. While that scenario has been put in this blog and elsewhere as a question to be answered, it hasnt been asserted as a fact, until Clive came along. The response was predictable, but what was interesting was that although a subsequent headline said Mayor Hill Rejects Palmers Claim, the funny thing is she didnt. In fact, as far as The Pie has heard, she hasnt said tickety boo about his attack, and about claims from others that shes going to have to carry the can on this one. Instead, all of sudden, the mayor went all media shy and we got this

Now, all that be as it may, the thing that caught the beady eye were the words a council spokesman. That phrase has been as rare as rocking horse shit ever since former editor Mick Carroll ten years ago ruled that all such spokespeople needed to supply a name and position, no anonymity. (Dolan Hayes went thermonuclear over that one, but he lost anyway.)

So now it seems the council, via a faceless, nameless spokesman (they probably rolled out the rapidly expanding Tony Bligh of the Legal Dept) as an organisation is pre-judging any official findings about what role the mayor played in the deliberate flooding of hundreds of Townsville ratepayers homes. Something to be learned there, Jenna Cairney .. as Mick Carroll said all those years ago, if there is no name and position to go with statements, whats to stop people thinking the paper just made it up. And that is far more relevant now than when Mick was in charge. It Looks Like Its A Whole New And Overdue Ball Game For Townsville A trusted correspondent on this blog we know as Memory Man has offered many intelligent insights here. During the week, he sent in this story from the Guardian

and attached these comments. This stuff is actually serious, and requires very careful consideration. Simplistic fluff from the likes of Col Dwyer about the poor old North not getting its fair share doesnt address the underlying drivers of risk / mitigation that frame the market for regional insurance. I know talking to colleagues in the global insurance market that cutting out a middle man or two would reduce premiums by about 10% straight away. This means going directly to the underwriters. Only a local authority-backed insurance operation can do this. The Gold Coast City Council did this some years ago. The flip side is also risk mitigation. In part this means making sure the right things are built in the right places. This is easier said than done, because the right things is a function of a minimal specification, which in turn is driven by a given assessment of risk and impact magnitude. Now, the rule has been to build to a 1-in-100 year event impact. This isnt as silly as it sounds. Folk whove derided it as a meaningless measure because such levels have occurred more than once in the past 100 years miss the point of of probability. The reason why the measure is relevant is that it also goes to balancing out the costs of building the right thing versus the probable costs of loss (or replacement). Over-engineering is costly to build, and in many cases also unnecessary. Societies accept that there are some things that can be built to a lesser standard, and other things need to be built to a higher standard. Thats what the public debate should be focused on. Critical infrastructure should be built to a higher standard; things that are more easily replaced can be built to a lower standard. Additionally, everyone needs to recognise that the probability of severe events occurring is increasing (as well as the severity of events themselves). So, what would be described presently as a 1-in-100 may be better understood as a 1-in-75, for sake of argument. It also means that so-called 1-in-500 events may have a greater probability of occurring in the future than was the case in the past. So a revision of probability estimates to say, 1-in-400, may be necessary. Bottom line though is that all asset owners need to take proactive decisions to ensure their assets are built to such as level as warranted by the owners own assessment of the trade-off between cost to build today versus value of loss + cost to replace. Where there is a social cost, this externality needs to be added to the equation. The lesson is severe weather is more likely but this shouldnt be a reason to stop things being developed. It simply means being clearer about the right things being built in the right places, with trade-off risks being clear to those concerned especially when it involves public implications. A well debated argument, and The Magpie believes that new infrastructure rules about flood plain developments require urgent review. Chronic Cronyism: It Really Has Got To Stop The massive upheaval at executive level in the council has given us a glimpse of the outrageously blatant jobs for the boys and girls culture that the likes of Mooney (himself a beneficiary of the rort) and the mayor make little effort to hide nowadays. A very good case in point is this woman

Shayne Sutton, who is also the wife of Stephen The Screaming Midget Beckett, the lately punted Mayoral shouter at staff and ratepayers. It is not surprising that the council became stacked with imported Labor odd jobbers with questionable qualifications once Mayor Jenny Hills poisonous report commissioned from the Nous group in Melbourne was adopted by council, but Ms Sutton has added a new dimension in the grandest let them eat cake style. The Labor old mates club could not be shielded from view when Mrs Beckett arrived in town, following hubby north after the Qld Labor Party decided because of his bad manners, bad temper and bad judgements were not appreciated in the corridors of central power in Brisbane. Shayne Sutton has been a Brisbane City Councillors for 14 years when they upped sticks for Townsville. But she hadnt been here five minutes it seemed when she landed a plum $44k p.a spot on Tony Mooneys Townsville Hospital Board this has been reported here more than once. Seems mr Mooney just couldnt find any involved local suitable to his requirements. But what The Pie has just been made aware of is as well as handling that onerous hospital task (less than 6 meetings a year), Ms Sutton was a few weeks later tapped on the shoulder by Mayor Mullet for a newly created, totally bullshit position as wait for it the Executive Director of the North Queensland Regional Organisations of Councils (NQROC). The what, you cry? Well, this

Gosh, that must take a bit of doing, you wonder. Sure does, as the job description attests. The executive Director draws on her deep knowledge of the region, its history and its priorities and Provides strategic advocacy and engagement advice to five North Queensland Mayors and CEOs Facilitates regional collaboration between key internal and external stakeholders to progress agreedstrategic priorities for North Queensland Media management Organisational governance and financial reporting This is a made-up position that in fact didnt exist before, and at a guess since the kings of featherbedding the LGAQ are involved probably commanded a salary of around $70-80K. Gee, well, you say, shed have her hands as well as her purse full maybe, but not so much that didnt apply for a job the board of TAFE as well. Dont known how that went, and maybe well never know the full extent of Ms Suttons contribution to a community in which she has lived for barely a year. But this murky NQROC position seems to have been suddenly de-created as far as one can penetrate the layers of obscurity around these goings on, so perhaps she is on her way. Madam, you are a massive leech and our already benighted community can hardly mourn it if you pass on from our midst to infest some other poor bastards treasury. Making The Best Use Of Your Townsville Bulletin This latest in the series of cringe-worthy self-promotions caught The Magpie eye on Friday.

And good on you Freda, you really do look a very sprightly lady. May The Pie add his hearty congratulations on a milestone hell probably not even get within cooee of. And reading your story, mdear, the old bird now perhaps knows the secret of your wonderful longevity you gave a hint when you said your daily dose of news from the Bulletin was what set me up for a good day. Its part of ones everyday routine and I just cant get on without it. Its the first thing I need in the morning. Indeed, Freda. As it does for so many others, probably works better than prunes and porridge at a guess, youd be getting on by page 3 most days. Guess She Finally Came Out Of The Closet Seems the layout blokes at the Scottish Herald had a wee dram too many when they put this page together but then again, it may just have been the world renowned Scottish sense of humour. Eh, Jenna?

New Aussie Tennis Rankings .. Just released

And The Week In Trumpistan

It has come to our attention that too many of you are paying attention. The New Yorker

.. Back again next week, Allah willing, but have your say 24/7 on blog comments, plenty of frisky opinion out there along with information you wont get anywhere else (that is, until the Astonisher trolls have read the blog Mt Isa railway crisis two weeks after the Nest, anyone?) Hope you enjoy what you read here, and any support for the Magpies Nest will be greatly appreciated, the how to donate button is below. http://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/its-a-bugger-but-maybe-a-blessing-too-do-we-need-to-clean-up-more-than-the-mud-and-mould/

[sweetlifetownsville]

It's A Bugger ...But Maybe A Blessing, Too. Do We Need To Clean Up More Than The Mud And Mould?

The deliberate managed flooding of Townsville should be the catalyst for a far-ranging review of how we do things in this city and maybe the way forward is to know how we should not have done them before. Are we entering the phase of the faceless spokesman? Seems so, as Mayor Mullet suddenly refuses to comment on some matters. The floodwaters might have receded but some leeches are still hanging around firmly plonking their suckers on the public tit one exponent of the big suck is particularly prominent or has Shayne Sutton departed our company? and never the twain should meet its not just the Astonisher having problems with keeping the wrong ads away from the wrong story one of Britains more respected papers has dropped a complete clanger Plus your regular illustrated Trump gallery But first Damned If Adani Do, Damned If Adani Dont The Pies favorite acid-tongued columnist, the Guardians Marina Hyde dropped a wonderful line the other day, and while she was referring hopeless and hapless British conservatives, it is so apt for our Queensland goofarium in George Street, The Pie will borrow it the Palaszczuk Government is like a gif of someone lighting their own fart and then being consumed by the fireball. Jackie Treacherous Trad has the box of matches, and our premier is the one whos been chugging down the vindaloo and frothy XXXX, or should that be Adani Ale. Adding to the fireball was Queensland Resources Investment Commissioner Caoilin Chestnutt, who became a roasting chestnut when she described the Black Throated Finch controversy as an absolute mess which would delay any subsequent approval of the Carmichael mine by between six months to two years. That was a bit rich of her, considering she was talking in New Delhi, in a country which knows a fair bit about messes in politics and social ethics. But those critical of what they see as a cynical and dishonest delay are particularly incensed that arch-Greenie Associate Professor Brendan Wintle has been driving the review they see that as akin to having, say, Clive Palmer being out in charge of an inquiry whether chocolate doughnuts should be outlawed. But Bentleys on to the nutty professors game, who seems to have taken a page out of the hunting with hawks manual.

Still Searching For Icebergs

The mans sensitivity and sense of timing (not to mention decency) was on full display at the Casino ballroom a few nights ago, when Clive Palmer hosted a lavish dinner promoting his unicorn plan to build a replica of Titanic. This affair had a feel of as Rome burns, being staged just as the devastating extent of the flood disaster was becoming fully apparent. Clive seems fatally attracted to things that have been destroyed by natural disasters dinosaurs, the Titantic, but the cynical Yabulu disaster was all his own doing but his only nod on the night towards the immense local disaster was a pledge of $100,000 to help fund any class action against insurers that may emerge from a flood inquiry. Very handsome of the man willing to splurge $500million on a wild whim. But the bombast didnt finish on the night. A day or two later, Palmer called for the TCC to be put into administration and the mayor sacked, because of her handling of the flood disaster. While that scenario has been put in this blog and elsewhere as a question to be answered, it hasnt been asserted as a fact, until Clive came along. The response was predictable, but what was interesting was that although a subsequent headline said Mayor Hill Rejects Palmers Claim, the funny thing is she didnt. In fact, as far as The Pie has heard, she hasnt said tickety boo about his attack, and about claims from others that shes going to have to carry the can on this one. Instead, all of sudden, the mayor went all media shy and we got this

Now, all that be as it may, the thing that caught the beady eye were the words a council spokesman. That phrase has been as rare as rocking horse shit ever since former editor Mick Carroll ten years ago ruled that all such spokespeople needed to supply a name and position, no anonymity. (Dolan Hayes went thermonuclear over that one, but he lost anyway.)

So now it seems the council, via a faceless, nameless spokesman (they probably rolled out the rapidly expanding Tony Bligh of the Legal Dept) as an organisation is pre-judging any official findings about what role the mayor played in the deliberate flooding of hundreds of Townsville ratepayers homes. Something to be learned there, Jenna Cairney .. as Mick Carroll said all those years ago, if there is no name and position to go with statements, whats to stop people thinking the paper just made it up. And that is far more relevant now than when Mick was in charge. It Looks Like Its A Whole New And Overdue Ball Game For Townsville A trusted correspondent on this blog we know as Memory Man has offered many intelligent insights here. During the week, he sent in this story from the Guardian

and attached these comments. This stuff is actually serious, and requires very careful consideration. Simplistic fluff from the likes of Col Dwyer about the poor old North not getting its fair share doesnt address the underlying drivers of risk / mitigation that frame the market for regional insurance. I know talking to colleagues in the global insurance market that cutting out a middle man or two would reduce premiums by about 10% straight away. This means going directly to the underwriters. Only a local authority-backed insurance operation can do this. The Gold Coast City Council did this some years ago. The flip side is also risk mitigation. In part this means making sure the right things are built in the right places. This is easier said than done, because the right things is a function of a minimal specification, which in turn is driven by a given assessment of risk and impact magnitude. Now, the rule has been to build to a 1-in-100 year event impact. This isnt as silly as it sounds. Folk whove derided it as a meaningless measure because such levels have occurred more than once in the past 100 years miss the point of of probability. The reason why the measure is relevant is that it also goes to balancing out the costs of building the right thing versus the probable costs of loss (or replacement). Over-engineering is costly to build, and in many cases also unnecessary. Societies accept that there are some things that can be built to a lesser standard, and other things need to be built to a higher standard. Thats what the public debate should be focused on. Critical infrastructure should be built to a higher standard; things that are more easily replaced can be built to a lower standard. Additionally, everyone needs to recognise that the probability of severe events occurring is increasing (as well as the severity of events themselves). So, what would be described presently as a 1-in-100 may be better understood as a 1-in-75, for sake of argument. It also means that so-called 1-in-500 events may have a greater probability of occurring in the future than was the case in the past. So a revision of probability estimates to say, 1-in-400, may be necessary. Bottom line though is that all asset owners need to take proactive decisions to ensure their assets are built to such as level as warranted by the owners own assessment of the trade-off between cost to build today versus value of loss + cost to replace. Where there is a social cost, this externality needs to be added to the equation. The lesson is severe weather is more likely but this shouldnt be a reason to stop things being developed. It simply means being clearer about the right things being built in the right places, with trade-off risks being clear to those concerned especially when it involves public implications. A well debated argument, and The Magpie believes that new infrastructure rules about flood plain developments require urgent review. Chronic Cronyism: It Really Has Got To Stop The massive upheaval at executive level in the council has given us a glimpse of the outrageously blatant jobs for the boys and girls culture that the likes of Mooney (himself a beneficiary of the rort) and the mayor make little effort to hide nowadays. A very good case in point is this woman

Shayne Sutton, who is also the wife of Stephen The Screaming Midget Beckett, the lately punted Mayoral shouter at staff and ratepayers. It is not surprising that the council became stacked with imported Labor odd jobbers with questionable qualifications once Mayor Jenny Hills poisonous report commissioned from the Nous group in Melbourne was adopted by council, but Ms Sutton has added a new dimension in the grandest let them eat cake style. The Labor old mates club could not be shielded from view when Mrs Beckett arrived in town, following hubby north after the Qld Labor Party decided because of his bad manners, bad temper and bad judgements were not appreciated in the corridors of central power in Brisbane. Shayne Sutton has been a Brisbane City Councillors for 14 years when they upped sticks for Townsville. But she hadnt been here five minutes it seemed when she landed a plum $44k p.a spot on Tony Mooneys Townsville Hospital Board this has been reported here more than once. Seems mr Mooney just couldnt find any involved local suitable to his requirements. But what The Pie has just been made aware of is as well as handling that onerous hospital task (less than 6 meetings a year), Ms Sutton was a few weeks later tapped on the shoulder by Mayor Mullet for a newly created, totally bullshit position as wait for it the Executive Director of the North Queensland Regional Organisations of Councils (NQROC). The what, you cry? Well, this

Gosh, that must take a bit of doing, you wonder. Sure does, as the job description attests. The executive Director draws on her deep knowledge of the region, its history and its priorities and Provides strategic advocacy and engagement advice to five North Queensland Mayors and CEOs Facilitates regional collaboration between key internal and external stakeholders to progress agreedstrategic priorities for North Queensland Media management Organisational governance and financial reporting This is a made-up position that in fact didnt exist before, and at a guess since the kings of featherbedding the LGAQ are involved probably commanded a salary of around $70-80K. Gee, well, you say, shed have her hands as well as her purse full maybe, but not so much that didnt apply for a job the board of TAFE as well. Dont known how that went, and maybe well never know the full extent of Ms Suttons contribution to a community in which she has lived for barely a year. But this murky NQROC position seems to have been suddenly de-created as far as one can penetrate the layers of obscurity around these goings on, so perhaps she is on her way. Madam, you are a massive leech and our already benighted community can hardly mourn it if you pass on from our midst to infest some other poor bastards treasury. Making The Best Use Of Your Townsville Bulletin This latest in the series of cringe-worthy self-promotions caught The Magpie eye on Friday.

And good on you Freda, you really do look a very sprightly lady. May The Pie add his hearty congratulations on a milestone hell probably not even get within cooee of. And reading your story, mdear, the old bird now perhaps knows the secret of your wonderful longevity you gave a hint when you said your daily dose of news from the Bulletin was what set me up for a good day. Its part of ones everyday routine and I just cant get on without it. Its the first thing I need in the morning. Indeed, Freda. As it does for so many others, probably works better than prunes and porridge at a guess, youd be getting on by page 3 most days. Guess She Finally Came Out Of The Closet Seems the layout blokes at the Scottish Herald had a wee dram too many when they put this page together but then again, it may just have been the world renowned Scottish sense of humour. Eh, Jenna?

New Aussie Tennis Rankings .. Just released

And The Week In Trumpistan

It has come to our attention that too many of you are paying attention. The New Yorker

.. Back again next week, Allah willing, but have your say 24/7 on blog comments, plenty of frisky opinion out there along with information you wont get anywhere else (that is, until the Astonisher trolls have read the blog Mt Isa railway crisis two weeks after the Nest, anyone?) Hope you enjoy what you read here, and any support for the Magpies Nest will be greatly appreciated, the how to donate button is below. http://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/its-a-bugger-but-maybe-a-blessing-too-do-we-need-to-clean-up-more-than-the-mud-and-mould/