#and I guess at least my opinion is written Somewhere

[rawliverandgoronspice]

I can kind of see why Hyrule reads as imperialistic to you in totk, but why do they read white? Sonia is brown and rauru is a black goat. What makes the difference between them and Ganondorf so bad?

Hey, thanks for the ask!

So... I have an answer, and it's kind of in layers. So I hope it's fine if I kind of go on Journey TM where I figure out my own feelings on the topic alongside you, the person reading! It's long! Kind of meandery! Sorry!!

Also, I had written a great version of this reply to this ask that Tumblr fucking ate and I'm furious about it, so this version is slightly more annoyed as a baseline because of Tumblr and not the ask itself. But I got stubborn and decided I would rewrite the whole thing tonight. So.

Here we go.

Layer One: My Basic and Unfiltered Gut Reaction

My first, potentially unwarranted gut-level reaction would be: I kind of think it's a stretch to consider them POC-coded. Sonia gives me more tanned Ariana Grande vibes than anything else, but that's... I mean, I'm aware that there are brown people with lushious blonde hair and blue eyes out there, that race as USA-infused Internet understands it is Complicated (I'm half-brazilian, and even though I'm very very white and don't consider myself biracial but bicultural, I had people discussing my ethnicity to my face a non-zero amounts of time, including quite recently, including in my own family! so I super get that it's more complicated than what I make it out to be here). But given vibes don't count as an argument, I completely get + accept if that reading on her ethicity is therefore dismissed. She could very well be brown. Fine by me.

(so, I feel like I have to add this borderline-conspiratory reason why I'm suspicious of her skin color being considered a factor here, which can 100% be dismissed but I still want to bring it to the table: I've been to several meetings and heard about many instances where "diverse traits" are being handed over to characters with the explicit purpose of using that diversity as shields against deeper criticisms of core aspects of the storytelling instead of fixing the storytelling itself, and honestly it could very well be the case here. I really hope it's just the team thinking Sonia would be prettier with a darker skin tone, because her design is genuinely lovely and I really like it, wish she didn't die like immediately and had a character arc of her own, but. Imagine the kneeling scene with two very white ladies and everything else, etc. It might be overly paranoid of me, but I can't help but squint a little bit in this specific instance, especially since the biracial trait here is so toned-down that it's barely there and barely committed to anything. Which would also make a good argument against this suspicion too tbh! Anyway. Just wanted to bring that up so you get the whole picture of where my brain is at.)

Rauru... Okay. Here's the thing: I can't unsee The Rauru. The original one I mean (and his Skyward Sword Gaebora counterpart), aka: the White Patriarch of all times.

(this has nothing to do with anything but Link's little recoil animation here is so funny to me, like he looks so shocked and his nose is so pointy)

I do think that removing the origins of this character from his DNA for TotK is kind of overly convenient when discussing this iteration, especially when his role in this game is basically a mixture of OoT Rauru and the Unnamed King of Hyrule (and every king of Hyrule that came after). I mean, okay sure maybe the Unnamed, Unseen King of Hyrule wasn't white but... it's obviously not true, right? And while I understand this is a different iteration of that character, many characters in the series maintain their base ethnicity across different reimaginings (even Blue Pig Ganon remains a gerudo at heart post OoT, at least in the way we keep on understanding him). And beyond this, given the fact that Rauru retains this energy of a Founding Father (in the largest possible sense), I feel that, at the very least, that patriarchal energy is extremely important to his character to a core degree.

But even so, yes. Rauru is now indeed a Goat Man. Not only is he a Goat Man, but he dresses in ways that are very inspired by mesoamerican cultures; undeniably so. So that would make him at least mesoamerican-coded, right?

I mean... I guess? I guess. Sure. But. I have now to introduce the Layer 2 of my argumentation, which is that...

Layer Two: Zonai Culture is Hylian Coded

So. Pretty bold claim I know. Let me explain.

Now I certainly do not want to say that mesoamerican civilizations are not *everywhere* in the aesthetic inspiration for the zonai culture in Tears of the Kingdom; I'm sure these real life references are overflooding the moodboards, from the color palet to the symbols to the artstyle, the costumes and the buildings. It's the main way the game communicates zonai-ness to us the player. And it's great! I wish they had went even harder in that direction (I think there's even pretty dramatic differences between the zonai ruins on the surface, much more interesting imo, than what was done with the actual zonai architecture at its peak).

But now, I will ask a question that I asked myself often while playing. What is zonai culture, beyond the feathers and the indented patterns and the swirls and the dangly bits? What characterizes it? I would say that zonai civilization is primarily interested in automation, technology, mining to develop said technology, and things that float in the sky. Beyond this, and from the limited perspective the game gives us through Rauru and Mineru, we see a society ruled by a patriarch (neutral term, it is just patriarchal in nature), married to a woman who is a priestess and doesn't seem to hold an equal amount of power (she doesn't speak as much, seems content to handle the religious side of things), who values collaboration and engineering prowesses, has an army, servants, robot servants, administrates other races through, to be docile and go the game's way, collaborativeness... It's Hyrule. It's just Hyrule, except older and with a different paintjob; but at heart, the style of society upheld by Rauru is very (eerily?) similar to what we get to know in the TotK/BotW era. Actually, this version of Hyrule seems extraordinarily similar to the Hyrule we get to see in BotW pre-Calamity: replace the zonai technology with the sheikah's, and what's the difference --except that this later version of Hyrule isn't trying to pass itself off as perfect? Zelda doesn't experience any kind of culture shock. Even the language seems to be basically the same. It is Hyrule, because it is. It's the origins of the kingdom. This is the whole point of the zonais: being that familiar thing that we know and love, except more pristine and more glorious and more mysterious so we can be sad when it gets destroyed.

So is it aesthetically inspired by mesoamerican cultures? Yes. Does it evoke specific details about said culture? The way politics and religion interconnect perhaps (unless we consider Rauru coming from the gods as such, but it's nooot super specific and not really elaborated upon)? What that culture valued, or what we assume it once valued? Cultural shortcuts we tend to make with these cultures, for better or for worse? I may be extremely uncultured here, and if that's the case I apologize, but I never really saw any of the aspects highlighted as the core pillars of the zonais commonly associated with either mesoamerican ancient civilizations, or current living native decendants of these civilizations. The biggest connexion or shortcut I see is the "mysterious ancient advanced civilization", which is pretty vague and was honestly more convincing in BotW.

Then of course, it doesn't invalidate that connection. But now, as a point of comparaison, to see what happens when Zelda takes active steps in coding one of their fantasy races... Let's take a look at the gerudos, shall we?

(Urbosa appreciation break. She's just so freakin cool look at her goooo!!! okay now we can keep going.)

I have said my whole spiel about the gerudos about a bajillion times now so I will try to make it quick. My tl;dr is: gerudos were always meant to be culturally disruptive. It's their whole point in the Zelda series. I won't rehash the whole thing about the crescent moon, the orientalism etc, but I think it's important to remember that they are meant to be considered foreign in a way no other Zelda race ever is. What I mean by this is, if we return to OoT: they are the only race hostile to Hyrule enough to not only consider and carry out an invasion, but to forbid entrance to their territory if you are not one of them. They have a different (apparenly evil-looking) god and their ears are rounded when everyone else is some sort of elf, their script is different, their cultural values are different, it's a weird semi-matriarchy where the man-king's occasional patriarchy has a very different social role than the king of Hyrule even if we don't get to see all the details... Won't return on the thievery and the 90s islamophobic kick of that time period, but the gerudos were very obviously crafted to be culturally deviant to the Hylian norm; their difference so great that getting accepted by them is an actual fighting and infiltration challenge. And even though they are much friendlier in TotK/BotW, they are still, by far the most innaccessible and different race out of all the rooster of, and it's worth mentioning, fish-people, bird-people and rock-people. They are the only one with their own language, their own strict rules that oppose your freedom as a player, a series of side-quests that directly address the subject of culture clash and differences; and, even then, they still parallel the real life western fantasy about the Orient TM (even more-so in TotK I would say, which I didn't love): the locked-in harem foreign men are forbidden to enter. This core idea is so entrenched that it becomes gameplay.

When it comes to Ganondorf, the parallel remains, more present than ever: in that game he gets to embody the foreign, cruel, brutal, cunning, manipulative, uncomfortably feminine at times, envious, physically intimidating, oppressive Man of the Desert in a long tradition of Men from the Desert and the rich legacy of literature and movies that portray them. It's not new to TotK, to be very clear: but TotK did double-down on the trope at the cost of Ganondorf's specificity as a character instead of questioning the trope that birthed him the way the series had tried to do in the past (even TP wasn't that bad, doing away with a lot of the baggage altogether --for better and for worse).

So to me... saying that zonais are mesoamerican-coded, in a world where we simply do not actively interact with these cultures all that much anymore (not at all to minimize the very real oppression of their descendants and the extreme and sickening violence their ancestors were met with to be extremely clear --I'm just saying that the violence wouldn't have worldwide cultural resonance in the same way and I don't think would have much reality in Japan unless, again, I'm saying dumb things and in that case please do correct me), or the extremely mild and non-invested way Zelda handled these cultures (to me it's much more costume than coding), positively too (good!), and comparing them to the active coding of the gerudos (and especially Ganondorf) as a means to equalize them as "basically the same thing" feels... a little off to me.

But! Now we're getting to the last layer!!

(you have no idea how long I searched for this gif, I typed "Ganondorf kneeling" in the gif search, like a fool, and parsed through much, much horniness to finally find my little dude anyway layer 3!!!)

Layer Three: It Isn't What Actually Matters Now Is It (at least according to me, the person writing this post)

Honestly, I don't really care whether Rauru and Sonia are white-coded or not. They could be, they could not be, cool by me either way. I don't really care if the zonai culture is meant to stand-in for mesoamerican cultures for Real for Sure or not, and heavily doubt it was done to increase diversity (otherwise Rauru wouldn't be, like, a Goat-Man but just a brown man). I do appreciate the visual diversity of the cast of NPCs, that hylians can look like a whole number of people and it's really cool Hyrule is moving into that direction instead of being very typecast into a sort of Japanese-ish representation of western middle ages/fantasy/fairy tale thing.

But at heart, what bothers me between this whole dynamic has less to do with whom is coded as whom than the fact that this game twisted itself into knots to tell a very suspiciously clean story about its complicated world and complicated history, and I feel like it's completely fine to ask for more than the bare minimum of visual representation and question the way these characters get to interact with each other and how their real life struggles are meaningfully talked about in the worlds Nintendo spend millions crafting? Sometimes, what they do is already great! Sometimes it's half-great! Most of the time, it could be so much better --especially when some of these subjects have been talked about to death for over 25 years (sorry to beat that dead horse one more time btw)

At the end of the day, the story itself is strange for many reasons. The power dynamic between the characters is attempting to be several things at once; maybe it's not on purpose, but either way, the world TotK paints is a strange one that only holds itself together if we accept to take it at face value. Which we don't have to.

And to me, TotK felt particularly shallow in that specific department of representation due to the whole... Imperialist Vibes thing (the other ask about this is queue'd, it's coming!), which nullified a lot of these efforts for me. It's not only about who's represented, but how they are represented as well, and, very importantly, why.

[loimposibleesloquenoseintenta]

I've been thinking about how things would be in Panem after the revolution. But I mean like 30 years or so in the future, when there's a new generation of children that have been born and raised without the existence of the games. I think about how the themes of memory and rebuilding would unfold. How would the relationship between the districts and the Capitol evolve? And the relationship between the districts? How would they organize themselves? What about the tension between people from the Capitol and people of the districts? And that's without mentioning what would have been of Katniss' and Peeta's lives, and all of the other characters of the series. How would their kids react after learning about everything they had to go through? What would their world view be like? I guess we'll never know. But lately I've been unable to stop thinking about it.

I read somewhere that Suzanne Collins said she only writes when she has something to say. And I mean, we used to think she wouldn't write another book after the trilogy ended, but then the ballad came out and (at least in my opinion) it was a great adition to the universe. Not only it added plenty of layers to the original story, it also introduced new themes and concepts to explore which are just as relevant as the original's were at the time.

What I'm trying to get at is that if she were to write a new book (or series) related to this universe, I think it would be interesting to see the future. I know some people want to know more about Finnick's or Haymitch's games, but there's always fanfiction and fanmade content that can explore those in deep. I'm aware of the discourse regarding this topic, and I agree that the games for the sake of the games (as merely enternainment) goes against the premise of the series. I won't dwell on that because it's been explained before, but I did mention it for a reason: would people be interested in a new story set in a future without any games? One about the rebuilding of a nation, the small steps towards a presumable better world and the awareness of the mistakes of the past?

I don't know, I got caught up in that idea and I wanted to get it out of my mind. I mean, we do get a little hint when Plutarch mentions how stupid humans are and how quickly we forget, at the end of Mockingjay. And then, if a story like that was written, what would be the culmination? Certainly not a utopia, but that's what life's about, right? Constantly trying to do better than yesterday, or at least not as bad? Maybe? Hopefuly?

Anyway, I just needed to rant for a bit.

[prince-liest]

First off; I LOVE 666!!! 'Multi-series hard kink/edge play pwps (though I'm with you on the 'without plot' being a total misnomer) that are actually in depth psychoanalysis of characters and complicated relationships' is one of my favorite parts of any fandom ( I'm being specific with that because no really for years in a lot of fandoms there's been that one ((or 2)) series that like. Will stick with me forever and make me think about sex/intimacy/myself differently. And your fic is 100% that for HH). I have a lot of squeeing about a lot of it that I hope to be able to coherently comment about at some point but for now!!!!

I was wondering if there was specific purpose behind where certain scenes take place? Like if they're at 'Vox's place' or 'Alastor's place'? because I thought there was a pattern of when Vox is (or ends up) subbing it's at his place (where he would feel safer and therefore more comfortable being vulnerable maybe) and vice versa with when they're at the hotel. But looking back at it to write this maybe I'm making that up? Because they just mostly do take place at somewhere of Vox's? Because I guess Alastor did end up 'going home' at the end a lot. In which case is there specific reasoning behind them not being at Alastor's place as often? (Does he just have less privacy at the hotel lol?) Idk I thought I was getting something, especially with that 'we're at the heart of your territory' line in part 8??? The more I type into this rambly chatty ask the more I think I was just overthinking. But it stood out to me anyway. ANYWAYS. *Finally pauses to breathe*

I really appreciate your series and I love your interpretation of these two weirdos relationship!!! Every snippet and every update I see drives me crazy!!! Thank you so so much for all your work!

Ahaha, I'm so glad to have written that fic for you in this fandom! Someone left a tag on one of the art posts for 666 recently that said "can't wait to see what emotional revelation unsafe kink will lead to this time" and it's. Pretty on point for the series, ehehe. With the likes of Alastor and Vox, it's really hard to dive into any form of intimacy without, like, emotional repurcussions, and that's my favorite thing to write! Thank you so much!

As for your question: To be perfectly honest, there's no specific pattern behind which location I choose for a fic as far as their roles are concerned! They mostly take place preferentially at Vee Tower because Alastor doesn't want to invite all the fuss and bother of Vox's...everything...to the hotel until much later in their reacquaintence. It's much easier to decide that he's done with whatever's going on and to dip out of Vee Tower than it is to have to remove Vox from the hotel (or, well, at least in theory: he portals Vox back into his own bed pretty easily after their night of drinking, haha).

Alastor inviting Vox over for drinks is a sign that he's actually, like, opening up a bit in certain ways by actually inviting him into his living space. Previously they'd mostly only been at the hotel transitionally, and during the second time they slept together, which is also the first time Alastor actually slept with Vox for reasons other than "for the meme", and was looking for a more comfortable, controlled environment to try this new thing in. (And also gave fewer shits about kicking Vox the fuck out without a second thought.)

In a way, the locations follow the general pattern of Alastor's emotional evolution throughtout the series: he's fine with it being at his place at first because he feels more secure and doesn't give a shit about Vox; then he transitions to being more careful and shutting Vox out of his personal space; and now he's slowly gotten to the point where he's comfortable inviting Vox in on occasion.

Alastor's opinion tends to matter more between the two of them as far as location is concerned, so it's mostly down to that, plus occasionally me thinking, "Hm, this episode would be cool to do in blue shark tank mood lighting," hahaha.

[dawnscales]

I'm gonna start this post with: None Jews please do not answer the questions I am gonna ask, nor do I want your opinion on it .

But I figured I would ask jumblr because haha I am a bit in a predicament.

I probs should start with this info: I was born and raised for the first 7-8 years of my life in Israel. I never had any doubt that I am Jewish, not there at least. I wasn't raised conservative but rather reform but you know, major holidays were celebrated, shabbat was held. I felt safe and I felt Jewish. While I did grow up speaking 3 languages, Hebrew is my mother tongue and I was able to write and read just fine ( for an 8 year old !!)

My mother moved herself & I to the DACH region of Europe. There is a tiny community in this city but nobody who spoke Hebrew. I did however fly over to Israel bcs i still got my dad and siblings there. But... my school was extremely antisemitic. So I started to feel incredible shame for being Jewish. My teachers deliberately placed Exam dates on our major Holidays if they could. My mother became an absent mother and I just. Pushed that side of myself further away. To the point that the language escaped me and Judaism did too.

It has only been over the recent years that I grew proud of my heritage again and started to wear my Magen David. But I wanna also properly get back into practicing Judaism??

So like does anyone have tips on maybe good books for studying Hebrew?? I mean it still gotta be in my head somewhere. I usually can follow ppl speaking Hebrew rather fine, I just stutter the moment I am supposed to talk.

But also all the prayer books I find here are written in Hebrew and I guess I would need them either in Latin characters or in English/German. It's so hard to get my hands on anything Jewish here ...like how do I even start celebrating Shabbat again by myself, or major Holidays.... if anyone got tips for that I'd be super grateful,,,

[crystallinestars]

That one BL ask you received is so funny to me because it would have been so easy to just send you something like "if you don't mind me asking, is there any particular reason you dislike BL?" but no, I guess it was more satisfying to just throw an accusation and then promptly block you 🙃

Anyway, I just wanted to say that I can relate to what you and the other anon said! I fall somewhere on the aroace spectrum and while my policy for this is just to live and let live (and block when I think it's necessary), it's sometimes pretty jarring (and alienating ngl) to see just how often people focus on relationship statuses between two characters when I'm like??? What about the rest of the story??

I think a lot of people live vicariously through their ships, especially if they're starved for representation in media. But that's kinda why I think it's cool when relationship statuses remain unconfirmed or ambiguous, because that way the source material can be elevated with another layer of possible interpretations (I hope that makes sense 😅)

My point is, I see way too many ship wars and like?? Who cares if it's platonic or romantic or something else?? It's all so boring to me because ultimately, what does it matter if it's one or the other? Ultimately it doesn't change the common factor in every scenario: that two characters were written to care about each other / be close, etc.

I also often see people throwing around literary / media analysis terms such as "x-coding" etc. to justify getting on their high horses and feel better about their preferences, when I'm pretty sure that the whole point in literary / media analysis is to find elements which can be linked into a coherent argument to support an INTERPRETATION. I'm sorry if the way I wrote this sounds dismissive, I'm just genuinely confused by this whole debate

Anyway, I'll stop ranting now 😅 Ultimately I just wanted to tell that I also agree with what you said and that I hope you won't get any other unpleasant asks in the future, especially if it's something that could be solved by a "let's agree to disagree"

I would also have appreciated it if the first anon didn't jump to conclusions before blocking me, but it is what it is. I can understand his reaction, though it's a bit immature.

As you pointed out, some people probably live vicariously through their ships, but therein lies the problem. They see their ship as a reflection of themselves, so anything that goes against their ship feels like an attack on themselves. This goes for practically any interest, not just shipping.

My guess is that investing so much of themselves into their ship/interest is what makes it so difficult to accept people's opinions/interpretations that go against theirs. And in the age of the internet where anyone can hide behind anonymity from the safety of their home, it makes is easier to send hate to those whose opinions you don't like.

As for literary/media analysis... I'm not versed in this at all so I can't say much other than I am sick and tired of people tossing those terms around. "Y character is X-coded" has stopped meaning "These are the reasons I think the character is X" and became "These are proof by the original source that the character is X, IT'S CANON". There are instances where characters truly are coded to be something, but in Genshin, 95% of the time there's no coding. Everything people preach is canonically implied is just their headcanon. Mihoyo would be shooting themselves in the foot if they assigned a sexuality to a playable character (I still despise the ship teasing though).

People are just scared of feeling like their interpretations are invalid, so they use anything at their disposal to shut down those who disagree. At least, that's what I think. In the end, I'm just as puzzled as you are about this behavior 😓

Thank you for your rant Anon, it was entertaining to read and think about. I also hope to not have to deal with accusations anymore, but I should be fine since I'm a small blog. Thank you for your support, you are very sweet :)

[claireelizabethsblog]

~ August's Books Reviewed ~

The month started out strong with me riding a Sanderson high, then I did a thing that I objectively hate and know will 9 times out of 10 have me reading less, which is started several books at once.... as of the end of August I was reading three books at once, yet none of them were finished so none of them get included in August's round up... look forward to that in September I guess!

The Well of Ascension by Brandon Sanderson

(763 pages)

The stress I felt reading this was unreal... which is simply evidence of how good it is. It genuinely was pulling actual visceral reactions from me and I physically could not put it down at points. I know this is a shorter review than usual, but I can think of nothing else to say.

I gave this book 5 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

The Hero of Ages by Brandon Sanderson

(748 pages)

An amazing conclusion to a really really good trilogy. The twists and turns of this were so well executed and completely shocking in exactly the right way. The ending in particular I never could have seen coming. If this were a spoiler review I'd be able to go on more, but for now, I leave with simply the promise that if you love fantasy novels, Sanderson novels, epic twists and/or social/religious/political commentary then you should definitely give this series a try!

I gave this book 5 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid

(585 pages)

I was gifted this book and admit to being a little wary before committing to reading it, as a general rule books that blow up exclusively on social media tend to be a let down to me after the copious amounts of hype they've received. I'm pleased to say that was not the case with this book. If anything, I was pleasantly surprised with how much I enjoyed it. It was extremely uniquely written; it was emotional, clever and beautiful. The characters were all so complex and felt genuinely so real. I would say that was the highlight of this book, the characterisation. Every character you could relate to a real person. You sympathised with their decisions, or at least understood them. Like real life, there was no villains and heroes. Bad people and good people and somewhere in the middle people, sure. But also like real life, the last group was the most prevalent, and the first two groups different to each individual's opinions. I would actually really recommend this book to almost everyone I know who reads, I'm pretty sure everyone could find something in it that keeps their focus, be it the mystery, the love story, the characters....

I gave this book 5 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

The twist of a knife by Anthony Horowitz

(373 pages)

I am like 90% sure that this was not the first book in a series, however it stood well as a stand alone book too! Like the other Horowitz book I read earlier this year, I found this novel a little slow to pick up at first, however I did get into it in the end. I found it clever and quirky and I loved the meta elements. Ultimately, it was exactly what it was advertised as - a light, humorous murder mystery - and actually, I'm not mad about taking a break for something silly every so often!

I gave this book 3 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️

If We Were Villains by M. L. Rio

(422 pages)

After the success of The Seven Husbands, I felt brave enough to try another recent social media favourite book. I'd seen mixed reviews over this one, however my flatmate strongly recommended it and as usual, our tastes in books aligned and it was extremely good. Despite the predictability of the plot, I was fully engaged the entire way through which speaks to how well the characters were depicted that I was willing to look past the predictability of it all just to read more about the people. In fact, I would like to make this a formal call for more people to start writing fanfictions for this novel because I want to read even more about these characters and am being denied that currently based off the limited options on ao3 (if anyone has any good recommendations please let me know!) I think, if I had read this in another month it would have received five stars, however it was let down by the fact that it was read within the same weeks as Sanderson and The Seven Husbands which meant I could not in good conscience give it full marks when the plot was just a little too easy to see coming for me. Therefore....

I gave this book 4 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

[ambrosialdesire]

I saw your post about yandere Levi so I was wondering what your thoughts would be on yandere Jean? (I’m ngl I can’t really picture him as a yandere but he’s so fine.)

to this day, i think his s4 hair is still kinda goofy (pls don't come for me haha it's simply my opinion, maybe it's because i'm still used to his old hair lolol)

my thoughts on yandere jean are kinda standard. as of now, i can only see him as a yandere that's not going to have much changes to his personality, whether or not the reader is an enemy or on his side. yeah if you're an enemy, he's first going to be a little hesitant on making a move on you but regardless, his outcome/methods are the same. he's not my most favorite character but i do like him and his character. back in middle school, i used to be OBSESSED with reading eren x reader x jean because of the conflict LMAO

sorry this is kinda short compared to my levi post, guess i gotta write more yandere!jean if i want to get used to his character haha

again this is sorta written as a gender neutral reader but it's also slightly implied to be a fem reader.

tw: manipulation, inappropriate touching, possessive behavior, implied non-con, jealousy themes

anyways back to yandere jean explanation. for me, he's not the one that's going to strike first. he’s the one that’s gonna wait it out till the end, but he will have his influences in order to get what he wants. he's cunning and observant, using what he's seen and known so he can properly manipulate. to the untrained eye, it seems that he's just cocky about being able to do this but he's secretly nervous and doubtful in his abilities, constantly thinking if what he's doing is morally correct. he's still as temperamental as he was when he was a trainee but it now eats him on the inside; he doesn't express his anger that much anymore but his jealousy is at a consistent all time high.

to his friends and other soldiers, jean just seems like normal jean. sure, he's a little overprotective and tends to move you away from the others so it would be just the two of you. sure, he may tell you things about your friends that make you think twice on why you're still talking to them. sure, sometimes you can feel his hands wander a little more than you're used to. but that's only because he knows what's best for you, right? jean promises he's everything but a dishonest man, he's only looking out for you!

jean is also known to be quite the daydreamer too, imagining a homely life with you despite the circumstances going around in the world around him. he loves the thought of you and him being all domestic, a child on your hip while you waited for dinner to finish before he came home from work. sometimes the daydreams wander into something more steamy but it's always quickly cut short because of the others interrupting it. he swears to god that everyone has it out for him whenever he has a daydream about you, like it's some kind of sixth sense.

he's always going to be a little mean to you, always teasing you but he always means well (in his standards at least). i wouldn't say he's a complete tsundere about his feelings but he definitely flirts, feeling embarrassed in secret about it afterwards. remember, he may seem confident on the outside but he always feels a little doubtful internally. he's definitely a force to mess with whenever someone else tries to flirt with you, he has a bite behind his bark at all times.

but when jean gets jealous, it quite literally takes over him. it's always a sickly, crawling feeling that resonates in the pit of his stomach to the edges of his fingertips. his temper is ten times worse too and he gets super insecure, to the point where he'll just straight up grab you and pull you into somewhere that's seclude enough to fuck you raw. he always puts in jabs about if the other person is better than he is and if the kindness he gave to you meant nothing at all. the hate-fucking always leaves you a sobbing mess, begging for his forgiveness and blubbering about how you only wanted him. then and only then will he comfort you, kissing your tears away and quietly apologizing, again repeating that everything he does to you is for your own good.

[luimagines]

Wanting interactions and opinions from the people that support you isn't annoying. It shows how much you value our voice and feedback as well as want to improve upon your craft. It takes a lot of courage to speak up and ask for something you need I mean the fact that you are even willing to take feedback about your writing is impressive and very admirable because most people would throw a down right hissy fit if someone said "oh well I didn't like this part and I feel it can be improved upon" now don't get me wrong constructive criticism is one thing but being down right rude is another if someone is being rude I wouldn't dignify the "question" with a reaction even less an answer sorry I think I started rambling and I forgot my original point that happens alot to me I want you to know that I for one am more than happy to talk although I can't say anything yet cause you haven't released the fic part that I commissioned yet and I don't want to spoil it for everyone lol

Well Soulmates from the Start has already been published because I couldn't wait. XD

I know, at least, that it's a popular series of mine so I wanted to give while I had to motivation to write it. However, it had mixed results. So it's whatever.

I understand what you mean and there are some people whoa re rather rude, or unintentionally rude when they disagree with how something is written, but I'm the type of person who gives the benefit of the doubt in almost every interaction. Either that, or assuming the best intentions of others. Very few people are malicious on purpose and I sleep better for interpreting it that way.

As for accepting feedback in general, it's just how you get better at something period. :D

And asking for ... a need, I guess I can say, is something I'm trying to get better at. I figured I had to say something about when I'm teetering on the edge of giving up the blog when I could very well just say something. You know?

I might as well try all my options, including posting somewhere else. So I'm going to see how this all places out before I throw in the towel.

[mollymarymarie]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you for tagging me @squintclover you treasure ❤��😘 i'm gonna make this a keep reading, because i get wordy

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

In total, I have 39 works on Ao3

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

so i didn't know this but apparently i have over a million words

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I don't write for HP anymore, but that's the majority of my fics. I have a few for the marvel universe and two weird real people fics (which now give me the ick so i won't be writing those anymore either)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Dear Your Holiness (lots of people share my priest kink apparently)

The Road Not Taken (for the angst, i'm sure)

The Lad That Loved You (it's my oldest wolfstar fic)

Bird Set Free (figure skating, Yuri On Ice, what's not to love)

When It Counted (this one sort of surprises me, but it's amortentia-based, so I think that aspect is the draw)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do! not as often as i'd like but i do read them all right away, i have notifications for ao3 comments turned on. in that way, i get to enjoy them twice!

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I have a short oneshot called Midnight about Halloween 1981 and I have another one called Where The Willow Don't Bend about Remus being a ghost at Hogwarts. I think those both end pretty angsty

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

In general, all my fics have happy endings. i go to fiction to escape the fact that almost nothing in life has a happy ending so i don't really like ending stories with anything except happiness. I really like the ending of We Can Pretend - they're in love, they get to be together, they're in Paris, their friends are all there with them, they're singing Nat King Cole to each other on a balcony while coq au vin is on the stove. fantasy scenario tbh.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

sure do. i won't list it. one thing that happens (which isn't exactly hate, but it makes me laugh) is when people criticize the fact that wolfstar are mentioned as having greys in The Road Not Taken because they're only 28/29 so they can't possibly have grey hair lol (i definitely had greys by that age, 100%)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yeah most of my fic is smut, but i'm sort of getting away from that. the TENSION is the best part, in my opinion.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

nah, not really interested, i guess.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so. my fics have been put up on other sites without my permission but my name was still attached to it, at least.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

a few! usually DYH. it's always nice to have someone ask for permission to translate.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no, mostly because i'm a control freak lol

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

it used to be wolfstar (kinda soured on me for multiple reasons, the biggest one being JKR is a piece of shit and getting associated with her works is not fun)

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

back when i was watching Preacher, i was (still am) obsessed with Joe Gilgun, so i definitely have a Proinsias Cassidy fic in the WIPs somewhere that will never get finished, but i do go back to it from time to time because, i mean, irish vampire. give it to me.

16. What are your writing strengths?

do i have any???? people tell me i do tension well. maybe that?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

first of all, NOT PLANNING AHEAD, figuring it out as i go and then having to go back and change a bunch of shit when i inevitably fuck it up. also, commas. i use FAR too many commas. i won't be stopped.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

i have a few fics that i have done that for. with French, with Russian, and now with Portuguese. it's difficult, Google Translate will only get you so far, but i LOVE languages so much. people will usually politely correct me

19. First fandom you wrote for?

OH TRUTH BE TOLD the Good Charlotte fandom, i am not even joking you right now. wrote an ENORMOUS self-insert fic for me and my friends with the members of Good Charlotte (i was with Benji, obviously) at the age of like 15 and the plot was SO fucking ridiculous. i mean. john mayer was there, ville valo from HIM was there (the main character had dated both of them before benji, of course). Elijah Wood was in there at some point and i think he was a murderer???? i should do a dramatic re-telling of what happens in this fic over tumblr (i will not post it, it is so so badly written)

20. Favorite fic you've written?

truthfully, i think it's Dear Your Holiness. i wrote that just after losing my grandmother and all of the conversations about faith still sort of hit me in the gut even now. plus the tension is really nice, i love the idea of a heavily tattooed Remus, and it's the music of my teenage years so it's very sentimental for that reason, too.

[jasontoddsguns]

I’ve read a fair amount with Talia (not a huge expert but good enough) and this is what I believe to be the situation as far as her age:

When she was originally created, she was SUPPOSED to around 18, yes. But in just the comics, I don’t believe it exactly got stated? We knew she was college-age, but not necessarily only 18. However, Dennis O’Neil stated in interviews that 18 was what he was going for. In my opinion, her behaviors in those comics, as well as her relationship with Ra’s, does make most sense with her only being barely an adult, even if obviously the fact that Bruce most certainly was in his late-20s or older is… not great, to say the least.

I’m not sure if saying they DATED when Talia was 18 would be accurate, though. In the early comics, their romance was mostly kept to Talia kissing Bruce on the cheek, and him smiling or blushing and complimenting her beauty/intelligence, while also trying to get her to understand that in the long run they weren’t going to work out. As far as Bruce’s receptiveness, he does kiss her (on the lips) once, but I don’t think much happened besides that.

Anyway, the whole 18yo thing got retconned around a year after her creation, in Marv Wolfman’s Lazarus Affair storyline (Batman #332-335), in which it’s stated that Talia is semi-immortal like her father, and (if I’m remembering correctly) around 150-200 years old. In this, they start actually dating for real and whatnot, but it doesn’t really matter since they’re both over the age of 25 (when brains are fully developed).

Her being immortal then gets retconned 6 years later in Batman: Son of the Demon, where it’s told that her mother most likely got pregnant with her somewhere around the end of World War 2. With today’s dates, she’d still have to be using the pit to look as young as she does, but this was in 1987, making her around 40. Probably not far from Bruce’s age, but possibly a bit older? (Also mentioned in Batman: Bride of the Demon, published 2 years later and by same writer, that no one but Ra’s has used the pit since Talia’s mother’s death, so she really couldn’t have used it before.)

Of course, this only lasts 5 years before Batman: Birth of the Demon, written by Dennis O’Neil once again, is published. In this, Bruce asks how old Talia is and assumes she’s immortal, admitting that he was hoping to get beauty tips from her on how to stay looking so young. Talia, although flattered, quickly denies this assumption and explains that she is “not yet thirty”. But obviously, when as young as 18 is a possibility, that’s pretty vague.

That’s where her parents meeting at a music festival comes in. Birth of the Demon was the original comic to include such a concept, with Talia stating that her parents met “in Woodstock, New York, during a music festival”. The confusing part is that I’m pretty sure Woodstock (1969) didn’t end up actually happening there? Either way, I’d assume that was probably still what she was referring to (most likely just an error on the writer’s side).

This, on its own, actually says a ton about her age. Birth of the Demon came out in 1992, which is only 23 years after the Woodstock festival. With pregnancy time in consideration, even if Talia was conceived at Woodstock itself, she couldn’t be older than 22. It also talked a ton in this graphic novel about how Ra’s and Bruce have known each other for a lot of years now, so… we’re back at the start. Yet again, Talia was canonically around 18 when they first met.

I haven’t read much from post-2006 (for obvious reasons), but between 1992 and 2006 the only age mention I can think of is Talia being younger than Nyssa, who… I believe is maybe around 200-300? Actually, just in general, it seemed like Talia definitely wasn’t immortal in Batman: Death and the Maidens.

Uhhh I guess there’s also Batman Odyssey to take into consideration? It’s one of the few things I’ve read post-2006, but I’m also quite confident it took place in a different universe. Anyway, it was a plot point in it that Bruce and Talia were friends as toddlers due to their parents being business partners. Since they were both toddlers at the same time, the age gap there really couldn’t have been more than a year.

That’s really it as far as my own information, so maybe someone else can add on to me as far as post-2006.

“Not an expert” bitch then wtf is this. Don’t sell yourself short.

[riko0youth]

plz no hate also,don't justify,you could hardly change my opinion even if its wrong

Since i started shipping Kaishin i always restored to translated DJs and Fanart to feed it, whenever i thought of reading fanfic i simply felt repulsive, that it won't taste good, and boy was i right, i understood the reasons very clearly, but yesterday, due to accumulation of a few reasons , i caved and tried it , and now i need heaps of DJs and Fanart mouthwash to forget this taste.

no offense intended, the writing style of authors is actually super good, the plot is very entertaining, overall a good well written fic, but it just not my thing, simply because the western eyes(and i don't mean ppl living in the west, im talking abt the ideology itself, wherever they're from) and mine don't match, they don't see or understand the characters as i do, and same for me, i fail to see and understand most stuff they way they do, so simply, me and the anime fics, we can't mix, i can have some tolerance for stuff like bkdk , but a classic literally older than me DCMK is out of question, how they portray the characters and take them out of context, while its good and fun...its just not them so its pointless for me to read fics abt absolute strangers, i would rather go through my kaishin pins twice than read smth while i enjoy it, gives me a foul taste (i guess that's what alcohol drinking is like for people, yeah, its good that i don't and won't drink ever in my life)

also, if you don't know, i merely write for the sake of journaling, this post is not meant to criticize anyone, especially not the hard working authors, simply my pov that most won't agree on.

I am not trying to defend myself saying this, but i am merely stating how my mindset came to be, first, my childhood, pre-teen years, and the first quarter of my teens were spent watching Anime, and the rest of my teens was spent reading manga/hua/hwa and Danmeis , that's it, no friends, no social media, no way to understand how my peers from any part of the world thing, only how the Japanese, Chinese and sometimes Korean ''Characters" live, like and think, so ya, very very low tolerance, when i unfortunately started opening up to the "world" it was merely to look for more resources for a good read, my mindset was already set by then and i felt like an alien (still do, but meh that's me) among everyone else, and more often than not i feel super uncomfortable from a comment with a mindset that's just so foreign to me it feels sickening (im not exaggerating)

so ya, lgptq+ , most of the relationship 'cues', ideas of (in my weak pov seems extreme) individuality in romance ,etc etc, they are all things i am not very fond of, cuz my mind is attached to a more simple process, watching ppl be in love ,period.

oh ya and the concept of incent, which i find hilarious but that's just horrible of me, incent is wrong for two reasons, ethically, you can't marry your sibling because they're your sibling sharing the same blood of at least one of your parents and that is sooo wrong (im not too far gone to think on even such a thing) but speaking ethically , for me a sibling is diffrent from a COUSIN they don't share your blood, their blood is just closer to yours from a stranger, they are not the children of your own parents, so, i just find it pointless to be so hung up on it, i could marry a cousin and only discover they're my cousin after we've had kids and lives happy stable lives, should i just destroy all that and make my children live in agony cuz someone somewhere sometime decided that marrying the cousin is same as marrying an SIBLING and even giving it the same label? of course , another point ,which is actually, speaking abt cousins, more serious , is Genetically speaking you can't mix DNAs too similar because it increase the risk of genetic mutations and disabilities in offspring, but the risk is always there, so its *unadvised* at most to marry a cousin if you are planning to have kids, but that's it, and everyone is free to choose between marrying the one they want and increasing their chance of healthy children, so its absolutely *hilarious* for me to be so hung up on "incent" between 2 MALE COUSINS , like really, *where are you even coming from?* (and yes im talking abt what you have in mind , as i said, i started kaishin fanfics just yesterday which is apparently the worst possible timing since the whole M24 trailer fiasco or whatever it is that's bothering them and got swarmed with confusing tags that just made me lose my appetite and feel vaguely uncomfortable, and "what's the big deal?" confused)

ofc as a person opening up to the world the first thing i did was to try to fit in, it wasn't wholly unpleasant ofc, i got some of the dearest ships to my heart that sometimes support me post-breakdown, but i tried to think like others, only to discover its futile, i can guess how others would think , but im mostly unconvinced by it or don't feel like agreeing to it, and that just works to make it easy for me to gain enemies and unpleasant impressions, so i mostly lay off commenting my opinions since its as foreign to them as theirs are to me , and im not so free or sinister to make others feel unpleasant on purpose, ofc no one is perfect so i slip from time to time when my battery (i call it LXC battery of patience cuz that's what i think of portraying when im controlling myself from commenting and arguing, using LXC as a role model to extend the Battery's life) and as expected those slips catch fire , i also mostly use the method of burning letters, except i don't burn them , i have a very short memory span on most thing, so i write it, say i will post it later, and the when i see the draft i don't remember if i did post it or not , and it would be very stupid to post the same thing twice, also im not so attentive to open a site or an app specifically to check, i would rather spend that time reading

Most of the time i didn't understand why the "western" ppl make a big deal out of everything and are so hung up on realism , i still don't but i could get one thing, and ironically im the living proof of that one thing, that is, most people's mindset is affected by what they are exposed to, aka, what they read, see, or hear, so if something say like intentional harm like pushing people off the stairs and people always survive, if crazy troupe like that spiral into normality smh, and someone ALWAYS read it and always seeing it, them it won't be that hard to apply in real life, so the westerns are just looking out for others, or less selflessly, like every human, are trying to convince others of their opinion.

ofc in my case, which i don't know if its an exception or there are many others like me (again, i don't socialize) that help is absolutely unnecessary, since everything i read see or hear are for me strictly fictional, I won't fall in love with a minor as much as i won't fly off on a dragon, for me they're all fiction, love, itself , is something fictional i don't expect to see in the real world, that's why i love reading it the most, for me what i read is what can't be found in my reality like dragons, travelling to other worlds, falling in love at first sight, forbidden love etc, so its no surprise i feel unpleasant when some person out there try to stain my "world" with realism after i always painstakingly separated them anyways bye.

[alexmercer2424]

Hello, could i get some headcanons for the HH cast with a (Gender Neutral) reader who rips out the very last page in there book, and when asked why, they say: "I always rip out the last page in my books, because then it doesn't have to end. I hate endings."

Hate the new app icon so that’s terrible…

HH Main 6 w/ Someone Who Hates Endings

Alastor

Finds this behavior almost admirable

After all, he was busy being a killer on earth and now he’s busy being a killer in hell

(Even if it’s like one or two a year but he’s gotta keep appearance and keep his power status)

He does similar with books but rather than ripping out the pages he sometimes like the speculate and make up his own ending, extended from what he read on the last page

Also makes your conversations with each other that much more entertaining

Alastor may ask you about the books you’ve read and ask what it was about

And of course he asks what the ending was about knowing you don’t know

Well the true ending at least, the written ending by the author, but loves to hear what you’ve got to say about it

May even start a mini book club with you where he finishes the ending, you don’t, and he sees how close you can get

Sometimes he broadcasts these ideas and speculations over the radio as well, he’s entertained by it all and he wants to share the entertainment

And like with his radio, he loves classics when it comes to reading

But also like with his radio, he’s into the murder aspect of it all so be prepared to read a lot of murder mysteries fiction or fact

Angel Dust

Thinks an odd behavior but doesn’t question it

It’s none of his business but also he has minor concerns you do this with all forms of paper media

Such as if you try to take his magazines, be it trashy reality or an adult shop catalog, he will likely start a fight

After awhile questions it, he got curious can you blame him?

He’ll go to sit somewhere and there’s like random pieces of paper around and none of it makes sense because it’s the end of the book

When he does finally get an answer he wanted, it’s not what he expected

He then asks what happens if the last page is only like a sentence or two like you’ve essentially read the end already and the idea of the end just minus a couple words

Ever since he finds more pages lying around…

Vaggie

Like Angel Dust didn’t really ask about it

It’s not her or Charlie’s property so it’s not like she could get mad, they were your own books, and to each their own she guesses

May pick up and read whatever is left behind from your reading wondering if it sounds familiar to her at all

But also like Angel Dust will eventually ask why you have this behavior

When she learns the truth finds it almost endearing

She knows about not wanting things to end, whenever insecurities get the best of her she has similar thoughts about her and Charlie

Or about them and this hotel

So in a way she understands, but her disconnect is real life experiences over reading fiction

If she does try to intervene in anyway, which she likely won’t, she may just take the book away from you before you can tear the page out

But again this very likely won’t happen

Unless she hears you talking about the book and wants to read it herself

And she would like to know the ending please

Charlie

Is troubled by this behavior at first

Wonders if something went wrong or that you were angry about something

But when she learned about your dislike for endings she only smiled and asked why you didn’t want to know

And expanded on similar ideas of Alastor as in making up an ending or extending the ending you just read

Also asks how these cliffhangers don’t bother you at all, in her opinion that’s worse

But she doesn’t try to directly stop your behavior, she’s never told you to quit it or anything if the such

But time to time she may come up with a different solution besides tearing out pages

From things as simple as closing the book and setting it down

Or something such as giving it to someone else to read so they can also experience the book with the ending if they’d like

May try to connect with you on the level of wasting papers and the trees

(I have no idea how paper is made in hell but I’m assuming tree)

Husk

Probably asks right away besides Alastor because he wants to know what the hell you’re doing

But when you tell him he’s the less likely to care

Remember, as of now, the only reason he’s around is because of Alastor otherwise he wouldn’t be here

What you said to him, your reasoning behind tearing the last page from books does stick with him

If he ever does find himself reading something and he closes the book as he finished it will pop in his head sometimes

Sometimes questions how your behavior would work as he reads something online

Do you just deleted or close the book on your phone or do you all put destroy the device?

Niffty

Niffty takes the longest to question the behavior

She’s an odd character with a few screws loose so the actual act doesn’t catch her attention

What does catch her attention is these loose pages lying around everywhere

With her craftiness and love of fanfic (as well as cleaning like that gets under her skin most) she’s more likely to collect the pages instead

Tries to put them together at first thinking it’s all one book

But when that doesn’t work that’s when her interest in fanfic and creativity spark

She writes her own story!

Finally asks who’s doing this so she can share her story with whomever helped her

When she learned it was you, both shared her story and asked about the behavior

(Quickly took away her fanfic upon learning the truth…)

Also offered the idea of creating your own ending

Also introduced you to writing and fanfiction too if you’re interested!

[booksandabeer]

Hello, I hope it is fine for me to ask you about this. I would like your opinion on something. I have just gotten into the steve/bucky community and looking through some blogs that seemed a good starting point to get fic recommendations. Yours is one of them but it seems to me, that there is less drama here, if you know what I mean. The question I have is about two series that I have seen discussed really controversial, people only seem to hate them. One is "Not Easily Conquered" and one is "What I'm Looking For". I appreciate that you seem to be more levelheaded about these things, so would you say it is worth it? And do you know more blogs like yours that aren't so hateful? I trust your judgement, thank you in advance.

Hey anon,

What a message! I don’t even know where to start with this one. Well, first of all, welcome to Stuckyhell™—I hope you enjoy crying about two centenarian super soldiers because you’ll be doing that a lot! I have to say that my experience in the community has been overwhelmingly positive so far. Maybe I’ve just been lucky, but I feel that if you don’t go looking for drama and realize early on that occasionally the best course of action is to privately roll your eyes and simply keep on scrolling, you’ll do just fine and it’s a pretty chill experience overall.

Now as to your fic-related questions. I'm honestly a bit surprised. Where did you see all that hateful talk about these two series? I think I can count on one hand the number of people who have ever dared to utter even so much as a mildly critical opinion on NEC? And I’ve never heard a negative word about WILF at all? Hm.

But you asked my opinion so here we go:

Okay, so. NEC. There's a reason why you won't find any mention of it on my blog. Honestly, I had kind of hoped that I could get away with never having to publicly speak about my, ahem, complicated feelings about this series. Guess not.

Let's just rip off the bandaid: I'm not a fan. Now, it’s not a *bad* fic by any means, not at all. The letters in particular are exquisitely written, and I can see why people go feral over them, but almost everything else about this series leaves me somewhere between cold, uncomfortable, or mildly infuriated. That’s all I’ll say about it outside of DMs because (1) I’m not interested in creating any drama here, (2) trying to understand the excessive popularity of this series just leads to me being frustrated and baffled all over again, and (3) I know that a lot of people—among them some of my most beloved mutuals and fandom friends—really, really love this series and I think it’s mean and frankly bad form to talk negatively about something that they love with all their heart, in a space where they are very likely to see it. I probably already said too much, but you asked, and this is my honest answer.

(And btw, this is also a big part of creating a chill fandom experience for yourself: Just accept that some things simply aren’t for you and you will never understand why everybody is so into it. But publicly & repeatedly railing against it in great detail is very unlikely to change anyone’s mind.  You’re just going to make them feel bad about a thing they love and they won’t thank you for it. Also, people can like different things and still be friends. I know—what a concept!)

So back to your question: should you read NEC? I mean, yeah, go for it. So many people adore it, maybe you'll end up being one of them. Just because I personally don't love it, doesn't mean you won't either. If nothing else, you'll at least know what people are talking about when they praise it or, apparently, hate on it, and you'll be able to form your own opinions.

The other series you mentioned, What I'm Looking For, I absolutely recommend. If you're in the mood for a long, sprawling series that stays very close to canon while also trying to make sense of its often faulty narrative logic and inconsistent characterization, this will certainly do it for you! However, keep in mind that this is a veeeeery slow burn series, so if you want to read something that rather quickly gives you all the fuzzy happy romantic Stucky feels, then perhaps you better pick something else.

As for other blogs that do rec posts. @voylitscope makes fantastic themed rec lists. @burberrycanary occasionally makes rec posts with the added bonus of beautiful "fake" book covers. @sparkagrace and @xoxobuckybarnes put together monthly reading lists, and @hazel-wand and @msilverstar often post individual fic recs. I'm sure there are many more!

And of course, you can always send me an ask if you're looking for fics that feature certain tropes/genres/time periods/etc.

[shinidamachu]

Hi! I love following your meta and detailed analyses and I swear you had one somewhere about the actual chapters/instances that had InuKik in the manga as compared to the anime but I can't find it :( Did I imagine it? (Why I'm asking is I'm writing one of my fics IWFA and I had someone ask me why I write InuKik the way I do and I was about to say cuz in the manga they give off the impression of being distant like that. Then I second guessed myself and wanted to reread the parts... anyway I blab.

Hi! Thank you so much! This means a lot because I do love writing meta. Unfortunatelly, I don't think I made the post you're looking for.

I'm still in the process of reading the manga and even though I use a panel here and there to make my points across, I refrain from going into deep, side by side comparisons because I feel like smarter people than me have already done it to exhaustion. And with a level of coherence I can only dream to achieve.

One of these people is definitely @inukag so maybe you'll have more luck asking her? If Cynthia didn't wrote it, she's still your best shot at figuring out who did.

And for whatever is worth, I think your interpretation of manga Inukik is actually pretty spot on. In fact, I'd go even further and say that anime Inukik was almost just as distant. The difference is that at least Sunrise tried to give them some substance, which in my opinion didn't work at all, since it butchered their characterization (Inuyasha's especially) by omitting very important scenes and adding meaningless fillers that in my opinion only made more obvious how superficial their relationship really was.

To me, love is something you build and trust is the foundation in which you're building on. To trust — and consequently to truly love — takes time. On top of that, a strong relationship requires efffort, honesty and fully acceptance from both parts, none of which I believe Takahashi or Sunrise showed us.

Boat dates under the sunset and passionate kisses are just bells and whistles. Yes, it looks great on screen, but it doesn't necessarily equal to real love. Infatuation, sure. But love? It's easy to make you characters go on boat dates under the sunset. It's easy to make them kiss passionately. It's even easier for the writers, for the audience and for characters themselves to confuse it for love.

What's hard is to actually take the time to create, develop, test and expand a romantic connection. To show how deep it runs instead of just telling. To make it unfold and progress and grow stronger before our eyes. To make it dynamic rather than stagnant. Inuyasha and Kikyo didn't have that at all, be it in the manga, be it in the anime.

Their relationship was based on mutual loneliness, on seeing each other through rose colered glasses and of the fundamentally wrong idealization of the life they thought they'd have together.

That being said, here's my unsolicited advice: if you're anything like me, I can totally understand why you'd feel the need to try and defend your point of view, especially if the person asked you to explain it in good faith.

However, even if your interpretation of the Inukik relationship was way off — which, again, I don't believe it is — remember that you don't owe anyone an explanation for your writing choices, but you do owe it to yourself to write what feels right. It's your story to tell and you can tell it any way you see fit.

I know our takes on this matter aren't particularly popular within the fandom, but they are just as valid. I lost count of how many Inukag fanfics I've read where Inukik was written to be a much bigger thing than I personally believe it originally was, but even though I disagree with that interpretation, I'm also not entitled to an explanation other than... that's the author's vision. And that's okay.

The important thing was that people had fun and were proud of what they wrote. As they should, because it takes courage to post your stories online. And if I'm bothered by an specific story to the point of not being able to enjoy it, that's my problem and I should probably search for something closer to my own interests to read.

Anyway... I can't wait to read If We Fall Anyway. It has been on my to read list for a while now and I'm sure I'll love it.

[garoumylove]

Garou and romantic relationships

I don’t usually write meta, however, I just want to get this down as a ‘meta’ for my headcanons of Garou and romance and why I will always view him like this.

NB: This post will include mentions of sex and sexual feelings. 

Also, this is my meta and I do not assume everyone has to agree with me. Everyone has their own opinions and analyses of Garou and I respect however people choose to headcanon him but this is mine and how I view him.

Let me be frank. To me, when it comes to romantic and sexual desire, deep down inside, Garou is not different to the majority of young men. That is, he has the same wants and needs as those of us who don’t identify as aromantic and asexual. To me, there is nothing in the manga to suggest he does not have these thoughts and feelings or that he doesn’t desire romantic companionship somewhere deep inside. 

He is standoffish, aloof, pushes people away and does everything to protect himself from any kind of interpersonal relationships, save for Tareo, but all this is coming from a place of fear (which he won’t admit). We can want something, like intimacy for example, and be absolutely frightened at the prospect of actually getting it. I know I have experienced this myself with things in my life.  

He has been emotionally burned and tortured so many times by so many people in his life that to him, to have that romantic and intimate connection is basically a crazy fantasy. Something he believes will never ever happen so I believe he has buried those wants and needs so deeply he doesn’t let himself go there in his mind. He is not so inhuman as to have actually lost the basic human desire for connection, no matter how much he rails against such things. All sound and fury, signifying nothing in the end. A blustering act.

Also, he has been relentlessly bullied and, as we all know, lacks a lot of confidence in himself. I think on the surface he is aware that now as a young adult he might turn heads or that people react to him in a certain way but he doesn’t actually believe it and probably finds it somewhat amusing. He is also not the kind to focus on looks so even if girls (or boys) were non-stop telling him how handsome he is, it wouldn’t do anything for him. He would still feel like shit about himself inside, that sort of inner child part of him. He basically sees himself as defective and the outside isn’t going to make up for it. 

I don’t believe Garou is not interested in love and sex and romance. It’s just that he believes these are not an option for him, and him wanting or not wanting these things has nothing to do with it. He believes everyone sees him in a very terrible light and there’s nothing he can do about it except become the self-fulfilling prophecy and become the monster everyone thinks he is (in his mind). We know he yearns for at least something resembling romance as evidenced by his cute Gau Rangers crush but he does not believe it is possible for him to have this with another person. 

So, catching feelings... Garou wears his heart on his sleeve pretty much and feels things extremely deeply. I do not think he would fall for someone very easily or fall in love at first sight, but once someone has caught his attention he would be in the deep end. The kicker though is that he would rather die than admit that he has those feelings since he’s trying to preserve this cold, lone wolf image, this independent cocky bastard that doesn’t need anyone. But as we all know he is just a soft cinnamon roll on the inside. It would take him a while to be ok with the idea of having these feelings inside as he’d see it as a form of dependence. And at first he’d see it as a terrible thing that ties him to something and stifles him but eventually, as things progress, he’d realise the comfort you can have with someone whose love you can depend on and how safe stability can feel. 

As for sex, and I guess this is something I can talk at length about (but I won’t)   having written the vast amount of Garou smut I have, I do not believe he’d be particularly shy or timid about getting naked and physically being with someone...the thing that would set his heart pounding, get him completely overwhelmed is getting naked with someone he had caught feelings for. Because it’s the feelings, the emotions he’s been fighting so long, it’s the intimacy that frightens him, not the physical act. 

I’ll stop here before I write a whole PhD on the subject and just TL;DR: Garou wants love, romance and sex but is too afraid of being burned and has no confidence in himself when it comes to these things.

Thank you for reading this far. I’d also like to just mention, I appreciate people headcanoning him completely different from me but I don’t really want to debate anyone on this topic. I respect people have their own opinions and the last thing I want is to try change them, just like mine aren’t going to be changed. If you’d like to engage with me on this topic, I’m more than happy to chat but I don’t want to debate. This is Garou to me. Always has been, always will be. My ideas and the details and nuance of my interpretation of him are always evolving and developing but I’m not going to change my basic stance that Garou is a touch-starved and lonely young man who wants what many of us do but that his trauma prevents him from really going for it.

xoxo ^.^

[thatgermanandbalkangooseguy]

Joy Division & New Order part 1. Ian Curtis, his illness, the fault of the UK NHS & the lost lyrics of "Ceremony"

This is purely an opinion piece: All of the names listed here are public knowledge, they have been listed in news, books, songs and movies. Does anybody else here feel like shit after listening to Ian's last two songs? (I don't understand how their audio engineer fumbled Ian's microphone THREE TIMES) Despite the songs being good or great even, it puts me off of listening to them, simply because of what Ian did a few weeks later, and how this SHOULD NOT have happened. I understand that he had something which wasn't curable, but he also had a dumbass of a doctor who gave him medicine which made both his seizures AND his mental state worse. If he had gotten a new doctor (although I feel he did not care any more) and had gotten the best/correct (at the time) medication he might've made at least a partial recovery and not resort to...what he ended up doing. The fact that we're not sure what Ian's lyrics are for "Ceremony" because the audio engineer screwed over his mic THREE TIMES in a row also angers me. He MUST'VE had them written down somewhere, and that "somewhere" is where even his wife or bandmates/friends did not know, as they had to use a graphic equalizer (this was around 1980-1981 so you can guess how horrible it was probably) to try and figure out bits and pieces of what the hell Ian was actually saying during the song.

There is absolutely no way that the lyrics to Ceremony were not written down, it makes NO SENSE. My worst theory is that the British/English/UK police found the written lyrics, among other things and confiscated it pending the investigation, which kind of makes sense. Once the album "Closer" was done and "Martin Hannett", the producer, reviewed it, his girlfriend "Susanne O’Hara" at the time read the lyrics and outright said "Did you even read these lyrics? He is talking about (...)!" to which Martin said "Oh Ian is just an artist, he doesn't really mean any of it!". Uh huh, Martin you scumbag. And as for his friends and band members? They helped him as much as they could, but the most they could help him is by dragging him to the studio and some concerts to "brighten him up" as he made his last two songs (In a lonely place and Ceremony) and then went on to a very small tour, his seizures became worse and worse, there was no stopping it, (this was the 70s and 80s in the UK) his doctor kept prescribing him new medicine each time he visited him, so it's hard to even keep track of what he was taking, but people know that there were barbiturates, and other disgusting things. Today, treatment for his type of epilepsy (pharmacoresistant focal epilepsy) do exist, but, it was simply too late.

There's a photo floating around where Ian is with his wife and his very young daughter Natalie. His facial expression in that picture is simply a bare stare due to the INCORRECT medicine he was on, and if you didn't know the backstory of that picture and suddenly saw it, you would think he's a psycho. I won't post the picture here, it's on google. Anyway, what I wanted to say was that the lyrics for "Ceremony" were definitely written down somewhere, but my theory still falls under the UK police confiscating it as a possible (...) note.

Ian, I wish you would've been born later, you didn't deserve to suffer like this but I understand why you did the thing you did. Everyone does.

Pt 2, when I get around to it will be MUCH shorter, it's about New Order, specifically one of their songs, and a certain Canadian in Montreal, and how one of my favorite songs of theirs was ruined by that piece of trash.