#and I may actually die from these allergic reactions

[roguemonsterfucker]

Saying “I guess I’ll die” to my mom at a minor inconvenience is probably not a good thing when she doesn’t know the meme and knows I’m suicidal.

[eustasskiddsprosthetic]

Hey, remember when I said I shipped Lawlulaw? Yeah, I finally have an idea for them!

As I was fleshing this out, I suddenly felt the need to shove in Acelaw and Sabolaw in there so uh that's fun. I wanted this to be Lulaw centered but the moments of Ace and Sabo can be very easily spun into a romantic direction if I wanted and I wanted to be open to having a Law harem!

Welp, anyways, onto the plot I cooked. Edit: I elaborated more on this au here (x)!

I'm thinking of Law as a scientist who studies marine life. He has a huge lab where he collects specimens and spends a lot of time sketching out the intricate details and labelling them. He loves drawing these because it helps him get a clear, objective view of the world. His ultimate goal is to know just what makes the world tick.

He wants to know the inner workings of everything, kind of to compensate for how he barely knows himself and the depths of his subconscious nature. He believes everything has a place. A creature's ever part, every organ, every component is like a gear that keeps the whole system running and Law loves analysing them.

It may or may not be surprising but he actually believes in things like monsters, aliens and cryptids. From his experience, there's so many interesting sea creatures within the realm of science. It seemed a bit rude to dismiss the possibility. You never fucking know.

So that means when he sees a merman washed up one day in front of the beach near his home. He shrugs and says, "Well, he looks better than a drunk Bepo."

From indifference turned curiosity, Law squats down and starts poking this merman with a bit too much force and said merman jolts awake. Law notices how sharp his teeth and claws were. Law knew he would die if he did not approach him correctly.

"H-hello. I'm Law. Are you okay?"

The merman was visibly confused. Law realised he seemed a bit dehydrated and realised his gills on his neck looked uncomfortable. Law understood. He pointed to the ocean behind the merman.

"I'll take you back," Law said. He did not know how to approach the situation beyond rolling up his sleeves just in case the merman had an allergic reaction to his shirt and very gently trying to carry the creature princess-style.

Law was horrified to feel that this creature was heavy and struggled with carrying him. So much for wanting to be brave. The merman did not do anything to make things difficult—Law just was not the strongest out there. He just stared at Law with literal stars in his eyes. He made a cheerful little sound that was admittedly quite cute.

Law let the merman go when he was just around waist-deep in the ocean. He gently poured some water over his gills, which elicited even more happy sounds. When Law let go, the merman suddenly looked sad and Law felt like a horrible human being.

"Good bye. Take care"

The merman was swimming rather freely in the ocean now and he circled around Law. Law felt anxious. Did he walk into a trap? Was the merman going to attack? The merman did not seem hostile but you never know what these creatures were thinking especially when they were alive.

When the merman stopped swimming, Law took a good look at his features. He was quite cute in the face with large round eyes and an equally large mouth that occasionally broke into a large smile. If he were human, Law would've fallen in love.

"Good bye, it was nice meeting you-"

The next thing Law knew, he was immediately submerged underwater. He could barely breathe and felt himself choke. Meanwhile the merman was giggling like this was all very amusing. Law was knew he would die, if not for something rapidly swimming up and forcibly dragging the merman away.

Of course it was another muscular merman. He looked older than Law's murderer and had dark red accents on his hands and neck. There were spots on his face that looked like freckles. Now this one looked predatory. In human terms, he looked like he was nagging the other merman. Irritated, Law stood up as best he could and punched them both on the head.

Law's murderer seemed annoyed and sad at the violence, while the other one looked mildly impressed. He whistled through his gills. At least Law knew what that meant—it was a fucking mating call.

"Shut the fuck up! You're both annoying me! Go away!"

The black-haired mermen tilted their head to the side at the same time. In the distance, a pale, almost albino merman swam closer. Unlike the other two, he seemed friendlier even with a heavily disfigured face. He laughed as he happily said, "I'm sorry for my brothers, bastard!"

Law was flabbergasted. This was not his day.

"You can talk?"

The blonde merman seemed more surprised than Law. Law would punch him too but he was much faster than the other two in grabbing them by the shoulders and swimming some distance away so they would have to shout at each other. Law's murderer seemed sad that they were separated.

"You can talk, human?" The merman replied. He laughed. "Bitch!" He seemed to say those vulgarities with great childlike amusement. Though, Law would not be surprised to hear that he knew what those words meant and meant them sincerely. He seemed cunning.

Law felt wet, disgusting and thoroughly upset that he did not die. "Why, yes I fucking can! Piss off!"

As Law made his way back to the base, he suddenly heard the blonde merman tell the pervert and his murderer something. They went silent when Law looked back. Three seconds later, they started making loud, hysterical noises.

For God's sake, Law walked away with a ruined morning, wet clothes and the horrible memory of nearly dying. That was annoying, as he walked up the ocean where he was comfortably knee-length. He felt something gently grab his foot.

"What do you want, murderer?"

The merman pouted slightly and fuck isn't that just the cutest thing? He tried to pull Law back but gently this time. Law realised this was kind of like a child trying to make friends. He sighed and squatted down again to meet this creature at eye-level.

"I won't go with you but I'll come back tomorrow morning. Don't pull that shit again, or I'll kill all three of you. Understood?"

That seemed to be what the merman wanted for he smiled brightly and made those happy clicking noises again. He hugged Law's shoulders, licked his cheek quickly, jumped off and swam off with his brothers who seemed more interested in this little guy more than anyone else.

The sight was sweet. Maybe tomorrow morning would be better...

(Also, Law read up on Merfolk. Apparently, they were acknowledged to be legitimate sea creatures only three years ago and there were proper laws to forbid the act of hunting and killing them. Law found it strange that policies viewed them more like an endangered species than human beings.)

(More importantly, Law found out that there were some highly intelligent merfolk could learn human languages. And even more importantly, merfolk use their saliva to mark their territory... Including their mates, whom they usually commit to for life... Huh.)

[thebucketpail]

When You Accidentally Kill a Clown pt. 9

Okay so I may have gotten a bit lazy with posting to tumblr, but I figured I ought to so. Ye.

Pt 1. Pt.8 Ao3

---------

Red Hood doesn't get nervous. Not when on mission, not when delegating his criminal empire, not when the Batman pokes his nose in his business, not even when all his plans are failing in a spectacular fireworks show. Because he knew he always had a way out. He had met death and come back. He had tangled with the nastiest foes the universe had to offer. No. No Red Hood didn't get nervous. Jason Todd though?

Well maybe he did.

No matter what he did to calm his nerves, anxiety continued to prickle at his skin. It's just a date right? No reason to be nervous. He would take Danny to get a quick dinner at his favorite diner, then they'd go to this big party at the Gotham Planetarium. It was simple. No way to mess it up.

But what if Danny had an allergic reaction to something at the diner? What if the event was too stuffy and boring? What if they hung out in person and Danny decided he didn't actually like Jason in that way? God, what if Jason said something that comes off a bit too stalker-y or murder-y? Well he had stalked them hadn't he? What if that drove them off?

The thought spiral was cut off as Jason splashed water onto his face.

No. Can't think like that. he sighed as he reached for a towel. Tonight's going to be fine he assured himself. no. Not fine, amazing.

---------------

Danny's heart couldn't stop racing as he stood on the outside steps of his building. Well, more of beat at a normal-for-humans-pace, but the point remains; He was excited, to say the least. Despite the whole week having drug on and on, the day had passed in a blur. Wake up, classes, lunch, get ready for the date- which honestly proved much easier than expected. The event flyer had said 'formal dress code' and well, Danny didn't have many formal clothes so the choices were easy to choose from.

He'd scrounged up some black slacks, to pair with his dark blue dress shirt, patterned with gold constellations, which matched with his gold half moon earrings. Both had been birthday gifts from Jazz. Completed with a simple black tie and jacket, Danny was really proud of his outfit. He'd even managed to find an ironing board to use!

All this paled in comparison when Jason arrived.

Ancients, this man was gorgeous.

The incessant beating in his chest, that had been driving Danny nuts for the past hour, finally died down as his heart literally stopped for the man who was now climbing off his parked motorcycle. Danny couldn't help but admire him. His dark grey suit was perfectly tailored, and he moved with such smooth ease it was almost hypnotic.

His breath caught in his throat as Jason finally reached the top of the steps, although that may have been his ghost sense.

"Evening," Jason said as he pressed a kiss to Danny's hand, "you ready to go?" Ancients Danny was going to die again.

"Yup," he responded as Jason led him to the motorcycle.

-----------------

Okay so the problem is: that diner that Jason wanted to take Danny to? Yeah it got robbed last night, and maybe slightly blown up in the process.... but it's okay because there'll be food at the event right? It's fine. Except it's fancy rich people food, hmmm. So they got fast food instead. It was nice. Danny didn't seem too upset by the change of plans and the conversation flowed easily between them as they shared fries.

He was absolutely everything. Jason loved Danny's laugh. The way his eyes would sparkle, almost glow, under the right lighting. The sound of his voice as he regaled Jason with stories of his friends. And he couldn't get over Danny's freckles, spattered across his face and down his neck.

Jason would readily admit that he had been stunned when he first saw Danny standing on those steps. He seemed the pinnacle of style, it had made Jason a bit self conscious of his own boring grey suit.

He'd had to take a moment to gather himself before he'd climbed the stairs to meet him. Danny had blushed when he had taken his hand. Jason loved that too.

The rest of the date would go perfectly, he'd make sure of it.

While galas weren't exactly his thing, Jason had never been fond of them even when he was legally alive and living with Bruce, this one was amazing. And it wasn't the rich party goers, or the live music, or the fancy rich people food. Most of it came from the way Danny's eyes lit up upon entering the observatory. The man was practically bursting at the seams as his eyes flit from the star charts on the walls, to the various astronomical instruments littered about the room, until they finally zeroed in on the giant telescope at the center of the room.

Jason let himself get dragged around as Danny ranted about one thing or another.

"I've been following this comet all month, Harington-Abel was actually one of the first comets I observed. I was almost six at the time. It comes by every seven or eight years and I always make the time to see it." Danny said, a fond smile gracing his lips as he turned to Jason. "Thank you for taking me here."

Jason just squeezed the hand that had yet to let go of his, offering a smile of his own. "No problem," he whispered.

Danny's grin grew wider as he launched into another explanation on the comets history. The night went perfectly.

Until it didn't.

It should have been expected really, being in Gotham and all, but Jason was still caught off guard when the shots rang out. And when the crowds began to surge he hadn't been able to keep ahold of Danny. Within minutes the two were separated.

Damnit, this was supposed to be his night off. Oh well, looks like Hood would have to rock the shit out of whichever of Gotham's rouges gallery had decided to crash his date.

--------------------

The room was in a panic. Danny had lost Jason and had to turn slightly intangible to avoid getting stampeded. Luckily, floor space became much more abundant as party goers fled. Unluckily, those who remained in the ballroom found themselves staring down the barrels of several very big, very scary, guns.

"This is a hostage situation!" Someone yelled, "everyone sit your asses down and put your hand on your heads!"

Oddly enough, most of the party goers only looked mildly annoyed as they followed orders. Danny considered not complying for a moment, but then one of the goons pointed a gun at him and growled. Danny decided he didn't feel like getting shot today, because while it wouldn't kill him, it would still hurt like a bitch, and he didn't want to worry Jason. Ancients, Jason. I hope he got out, or is at least safe.

Danny craned his neck to search the room but came up with nothing.

"Alright! Everyone empty your pockets, put any valuables in a pile in front of you! No funny business, ya hear?" The same man from earlier called.

Honestly, there were probably smarter things to do, but see, Danny is what we in the business like to call; an idiot? Which is why he didn't move to take out his wallet, unlike everyone else in the room. Unfortunately this did not go unnoticed, evident by the way a goon stomped over to him, crouched, and stuck the barrel of their gun under Danny's chin.

"Fork it over pretty boy," They growled, their smile not reaching their eyes. Danny noted how they were missing a considerable amount of teeth. He voiced that observation. (See this is why we call him an idiot).

The goon seethed, anger flaring in their eyes as the gripped the front of Danny’s shirt. "Why I Oughta-"

"Oof," Danny cut them off, having caught a whiff if their horrendous breath, "when was the last time you brushed your teeth dude?"

It was at this moment that Danny knew: he fucked up. Silently he cursed himself for his lack of filter, and/or sense of self preservation. Oh well, sorry Jason. If Danny's getting shot he may aswell punch a few people.

"What's that?" He exclaimed, staring pointedly at something behind the goons back; grinning when they turned to look. Danny took the opening, landing a solid blow to their face which sent them careening to the ground. He winced at the sickening popping sound, wondering for half a moment if he had put too much strength into that punch.

The room suddenly filled with shouting once more and Danny knew he would need to move fast if he was going to avoid unnecessary casualties. Although it had been awhile since he'd fought living people, his core thrummed with the promise of a fight.

Duck. weave. move. Punch. It all came easily, he didn't even have to transform or use any of his more ghostly powers.

One guy came charging at him, yelling and brandishing his gun like a club. Danny simply took a step to the side and let the behemoth of a man crash into his cohorts. He ducked another swing at his head and swept another's feet out form under them. Someone grabbed him from behind and Danny bit that motherfucker's hand, hard.

"GET THIS GUY OFF OF ME!" The man screamed as he tried pulling away, but Danny held tight.

Someone else- fuck how many of these people are there?- grabbed Danny by the waist and pulled him off the man who would probably never have a career in hand modeling after this.

Danny scrambled In the person's grasp, kicking, clawing, and biting at anything he could reach. His foot connected with something soft, followed by a wheeze, causing the grip around his torso to lessen enough for Danny to squirm out. He turned In time to see his aggressor curl up on the floor, tears streaming down their face.

"Fucking Hell!" Danny screamed as something tore through his calf. Great, the idiots remembered they have guns, Danny thought, sparing a glance to survey the damage. He'd probably be fine, the bullet had only grazed him, but it would hurt like a bitch for a few days at least.

Like a demon straight from hell itself, Danny went after the remaining goons. In a matter of minutes, the fight was over.

"Damn, that felt good. Everyone okay?" He called, surveying the room for any sign of injury, or Jason. Danny kind of hoped he hadn't seen that, might scare the man off, and he had been getting fond of him too. Luckily (or unluckily depending on how you see it) Jason was not in the crowd of faces in the main ballroom where the fight had taken place.

Some of the hostages managed to break their shock enough to help Danny tie up the bad guys and toss them in a pile near the center of their room. Danny was just about to toss the last guy on said pile when his ghost sense did that half sense thing like when-

"Jason?" He called.

Instead, Red Hood burst through the doors, pistols at the ready. "Alright, which one of you fuckers decided to ruin my evening because I swear to fuck-" He stopped short at the sight displayed before him. He lowered his pistols as he took it in. "What the-" Finally his gaze landed on Danny.

"Oh, hi again!" Danny beamed, shifting the guys weight so he could wave at Hood. "Sorry for the uh- mess. None of them are dead though so don't worry."

There was a long pause, Danny almost flat uncomfortable with the way Red Hood was staring at him. Finally, the vigilante broke the silence.

"You have blood on your face." The unbothered tone stunned Danny for a second before he wiped at his face.

"Probably from that guy's hand," he responded, gesturing at the man he had bitten who was currently at the bottom of the pile.

Hood chuckled at that, a creepy sound coming through the modulator. "Sick," he said before turning on his heel and matching right back out the door. "Looks like you've got this covered so imma head out."

"Well bye then, I guess."

Then Hood was gone.

.

.

.

A few hours of police questioning later, Danny finally found Jason sitting on the steps outside. Apparently he had been swept out the door in the stampede of people and had spent the whole time worrying about Danny who found it incredibly sweet.

Danny breathed a sigh of relief as he plopped down and leaned against Jason's (incredibly muscular) shoulder.

"Sorry about such a terrible first date."

"Don't sweat it man, this isn't the worst date I've been on." Danny replied, turning to face his date, "Besides, I had fun. Y'know before the hostage situation bits."

Jason chuckled at that. A win in Danny's book. Ancients, Jason has a nice smile.

"Alright let's get you home, it's been a long night,"

"Ugh I don't want to get up," Danny bemoaned as the other stood, taking his shoulder with.

"Come on," Jason laughed pulling at Danny's arm. He groaned more but allowed Jason to pull him to his feet. Danny hissed suddenly at a sharp pain in his leg before falling forward into Jason's arms.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

Danny winced as he shifted his weight, damn he'd be sore tomorrow. "Nothing, got grazed by a stray bullet is all," he said, but quickly hurried on when worry washed over the other man's face. "Don't worry I got the paramedics to check it, it should be fine in a few days so long as I keep it clean." Danny of course, hadn't talked to the paramedics, he had, in fact, been avoiding them. But Jason didn't need to know that.

Jason frowned but seemingly accepted the answer nonetheless. "Alright," he said. Danny smiled at him.

"See it's fine, I can even walk," Danny said moving to take a step. But as if by some cruel joke from the gods, he tripped. He fell for only a moment before Jason caught him and pulled him back.

"Deja vu," he smirked. Danny felt heat brush at his cheeks just as his feet were swept from beneath him.

"I can walk you know," he pouted but didn't struggle as Jason carried him to his bike.

"Yeah I'm sure that why you fell after one step."

Danny humbled indignantly in lieu of a proper response as he was deposited on the leather seat.

"Beside I feel kind of responsible for getting you home safe after this whole debacle. I mean it's my fault you were here and all." Something warm bloomed in Danny's chest as he accepted the helmet Jason gave him.

Danny didn't stop smiling the entire way home. Jason walked him all the way to his dorm. They parted with promises to do this again, minus all the hostage-y bits.

All things considered, it was a really good date.

Pt. 10

[foap-enjoyer]

2023 Halloween funny moments.

Bit of a different kind of post than normal, but I just wanted to share with the world.

I answer my door each year on Halloween (In the UK) with my many, many animals (snakes, lizards, spiders, ect), and these are some of the best responses I've gotten to each animal this specific year:

With pictures!

So trigger warning for snakes/lizards/cockroaches/tarantulas.

Lizard (Bearded dragon) (adult) - Is that a gecko? - Oh mum look, it's a... it's... a dinosaur? - Oh wow, that's cool. It's a Komodo lizard thing, right? - Mum! Mum look! He has an armadillo-thingy! - Oh my teacher used to have one of those. It died, I think. - It licked me IT LICKED ME I'M GOING TO DIE - Oh my God it's ACE, HI ACE I KNOW YOU (People know my lizard more than me..)

~

Snake (Royal 'ball' Python) (adult) - Holy SHIT - Get that thing away FROM MEEEE - Why would you own one of those. Respectfully, Mr.. snake.. owner, sir? - That's one wicked worm my guy - Is it a boa constrictor? I know snakes really well. - I WANNA HOLD IT MUM CAN I HOLD IT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE - I like snakes. They like violence, like me. ("Oh, actually he's very shy and gentle...") I don't like this snake. - MUM IT'S THE SNAKE MAN! (I'm well known in these parts as the 'reptile man' haha)

~ Snake (Hognose snake) (adult) - Why can't I hold this snake? ("Because he's very mean. He eats children") *cries* ("Only bad children, I promise!") *cries harder* - He's ginger! Ewwww! - He's very small... But it's the personality that counts, hey mate? - It's a cornsnake! With a.. oh. It's nose is deformed. Was it inbred?

~ Tarantula (Nhandu Chromatus/Brazillian Red 'n' white) (adult) - FUCK NO. FUCK. NO. - PISS OF YA DAFT CUNT (To the spider, not me... I think?) - Is it fluffy? Like a dog, I mean. It looks spiky, like a hedgehog. - Can I hold it? ("No, I'm sorry, they're fragile) Wow I've been lied to I thought they were tough as hell. - You, yeah both of you, you've got issues. - It looks like a Tony or something. Is it called Tony? - That fuckers bigger than my face, you feed him fingers or something?

~ Tarantula (Brachypelma hamorii/Mexican red knee) (baby) - Oh my God... You know what? That's kind of cute. - Mum, can we get one? "Fuck no, Tyler." - It's... what exactly does it do ("Nothing?") well that's boring. - It at least looks cuter than the house-spider I let stay in the corner of my room. He's called Terry.

~ Madagascan hissing cockroaches (adults) - Why would you own these. - Oh these are those hissing ones... Why aren't they hissing? - It bit me ("It's just her legs holding on") damn gurl you got some daggers on your feet - Can I steal them - Can I eat them - Can I take a selfie with them? - What are their names? ("Oh they're named after Mario princesses-") DAMN where's Princess Peach? PEACH?? PEACH WHERE ARE YOU?! (Don't worry, he found Peach, Peach is the third one. Yes, I can tell them apart)

~

Just a small reminder that I am an actual professional with these animals and I don't recommend doing this for Halloween unless you know what you're doing and, more importantly, know your animal (especially with tarantulas!). I did not let any child or adult hold my tarantulas nor my hognose (They're venomous, even if it's a small dose, allergic reactions may occur), and I know my python well enough to know he'll never strike, same with my beardie.

These are, also, not the only animals I have. I have thirteen in total :)

Just a lil notice! All fun though! Hope you enjoyed!

[paradoxcase]

Chapter 17 of Harrow the Ninth

Was also originally going to put this one together with Chapter 16, but again, it got long. There's way more to think about, and way more that's being obscured in this book than in Gideon the Ninth

This is funny coming after them all being upset about forgetting Cytherea's House name

Does "our holy resurrections" refer to them becoming Lyctors? Like, presumably if Augustine and Mercy were the very first people in their Houses they might have actually been part of the original resurrection, but it sounds like Cytherea was probably just born the usual way long after that

You know, it's funny, I noted it in the Dramatis Personae, but I actually forgot until now that Mercy was the Eighth House Lyctor. It's funny that there were two Lyctors who were experts on spirit magic (Augustine and Cassiopeia, if I understand the last chapter correctly) and neither of them was from the House that specifically specializes in spirit magic. Meanwhile, the founding member of the Eighth House specializes in having a very exacting knowledge of physical anatomy

So, I guess by this scheme, Ianthe is like, the Saint of Duels or something, and Harrow thinks she is the Saint of Epic Poetry but is actually the Saint of Bad Jokes and Titty Mags

It's kind of funny that John was completely wrong about how Mercy and Augustine would react to being asked about Cristabel. I wonder if there was something more complicated going on with her, or if John just has a really bad memory, like on the order of my grandfather remembering that my mother had a special relationship with peanuts, but incorrectly thought it must have been that she loved peanuts instead of the reality that she was deathly allergic to peanuts, and therefore sent us a giant thing of peanut brittle every Christmas that had to be handled like it was nuclear waste

Although, on second look, Mercy's reaction sort of seems sort of like maybe Cristabel meant a lot to her and she's just unhappy about talking about her with Harrow because she doesn't like Harrow and doesn't think Harrow is worthy of being part of a discussion about her. And Augustine does say she was "a delight" but he also says

so possibly the first part was sarcastic, or this is just Augustine's general fake affect that was mentioned in the last chapter

Yes, not being able to cook is infinitely more disabling when you don't even know what pasta is. Is this Harrow's issue with cooking, then, that she just doesn't know anything about the food the most people eat in places that don't have constant food shortages?

This is very interesting. Has Mercy killed a Lyctor, or planned to kill a Lyctor, or this just Augustine opportunistically saying something nasty about Mercy?

She says this, even though literally everyone on the Mithraeum hates her to some degree except maybe John, they complain about having to associate with her or help her and talk about how she's broken, and they all think she is going to die and none of them care. I guess from her perspective this is not actually worse than being constantly told about how she is 200 dead children, not to mention being told by her parents to commit suicide

Dying to know why this is. I mean, I guess he might be weirded out that she calls him Ortus and not Gideon, but other than that, why would he want to kill her? So far the only thing he's done on screen was tell John about Number Seven and agree to stay and fight it based on John's decision. Does he think she will endanger them in the fight, or something?

I seem to recall that John and Mercy had some thought that Gideon the First would be interested in some recent happenings in the Nine Houses, or something that was part of the BOE war back on the shuttle. Along the same lines that the Body may have been worried that Mercy would connect Harrow with Gideon's mom, is the recent event that Gideon the First would be interested in actually Gideon Nav's mom crashlanding on Pluto? In which case, does he think that Harrow maybe had something to do with that? Only, I think whatever it is that Mercy and John were discussing, it sounds like they haven't actually shared that news with Gideon the First, or at least hadn't at the time they were on the shuttle

[frizzle-mcshizzle]

!!!!!!! OKAY WOW I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS

about Amias and Regaila; did amais actively dislike josie or was he mostly indifferent to her? and how would that affect the way he parented her compared to regaila?

(i'm enraptured with this story now but I'll try not to spam you with asks lol)

(als BABY JOSIE!!!! SHE WAS SO CUTE OMG SHE'S SO TINY AND BABY. i have a few questions about her design but I'm trying not to flood your inbox haha. ALSO I'M IN LOVE WITH HER OUTFIT)

FLOOD MY INOBX, PLEASE, IM BEGGING YOU, IT IS LITERALLY WHAT I WANT i miss getting tons of asks

at first he was indifferent, just like ok this is my kid now I guess? it doesn't matter of being around her reminds him what he lost or that hes not ready for another kid. she makes my wife happy so thats all that matters.

he cared about her but not as much as you should about your own child, burshed her off a lot didn't spend a lot of time with her, he thought of her as Regaila's daughter not his

when she had an allergic reaction when she was three he was genuinely terrified, he may not have loved her as much as he should but he didn't want to lose another child, she only because Forkle did end up helping in a disguise and making sure she didn't die, but both he and Regaila refused to ever give her another exiler so they wouldn't risk losing her again.

But as she got older she started to act oddly, would stare at Callista and Evander's wanderlings and ask people if they could hear them singing, which confused everyone because only Gnomes could hear the songs, she would write notes in a "secret code" that Amais recognized from his father's papers from the council but couldn't remember what they where for. the way animals seemed to just a little to friendly to her. she knew the names of every star because of all that she was mostly unpopular with the kids outside her family because they thought she was strange, so she mostly hung out with her cousins, and Amais just kinda brushed it off when she was picked on telling her shes gotta be tough.

when she manifests as a telepath at nine rumors start going around about how she’s some kind of weapon that was made by the council especially after people realize telepaths can't get her mind. (when originally the only rumor about her origin was that she was Oralie and Kenrics illegitimate child) some people around them even mention project moonlark. Ideila Cyrus and Regaila acknowledge to her that she’s possibly something like that, but tell Josie if that’s true whatever she was made for they won’t let them hurt or use her.

around that time Amias starts to actually say that Josie is not his kid when Josie and Regaila arnt around when people ask and just say she’s his wife’s kid, and when Josie overhears him saying that to some of his friends sue realizes he doesn’t love her for the first time. Josie goes to Regaila about it but shes is in denial for a bit before trying to convince him that Josie is still his child, because she loves them both, and Amias loves her, so he just had to learn to love Josie.

she pushes them to spend more time together and it really doesn't go anywhere, Amais just stops denying that Josie is his daughter because it upsets Regaila not because of it's effects on Josie.

When Josie is ten Regaila gets pregnant, she doesn’t tell Amais for a bit because she doesn’t know how he will react considering he still doesn’t accept Josie and its been ten years.

while Regaila is out with Athena asking her how to tell Amias asking her how to tell Amias shes pregnant, Amias goes in the tent exhausted and relaxes in his "room" leaving Josie watching T.v in the largest part of the tent. someone comes to the door for some arbitrary reason and Josie answers it and says her dad is in his room.

after Amias deals with the person at the door he turns to Josie and tells her to stop telling people he’s her dad because he’s not, Josie asks what he means. Amias tells her he just "only let Regaila adopt her because it made her happy to have a baby again and all he wanted was for her to be happy, he didn’t want another kid, he just wants his baby back, but that wasn’t going to happen, so he made a sacrifice for her sake. but he didn’t sign up for some thing who stares at trees and draws odd symbols in the dirt. and he definitely didn’t sign up for a kid who manifests four years early and who’s mind no telepath can get into."

Josie starts crying and saying she'll try to be normal promising nit to use her ability until the normal manifestation age. Amias starts scolding her saying it’s impossible for her and it escalates to the point that Josie manifests as a inflictor and inflicts on him. they both collapse and when Josie snaps out of it and runs over to him and starts shaking him trying to wake him up, when he comes to he shoves her away and tells her to stay away from him, she scoots closer crying and says “dad, i didn’t mean to hurt you!” and he backs away and says “i’m not your dad get away from me!!”

Josie starts crying harder and she starts to spark again and Amias realizes whats coming and runs to his and Regaila’s room and zipps the door shut, Josie follows him to the door and keeps apologizing through it but he keeps yelling at her to shut up and stay away from him sounding completely terrified of her.

Regaila comes home because of all the commotion and finds her 10 year daughter curled up at the door apologizing to her husband and promising she would be normal over and over.

Regaila scoops up her up and takes her to the couch and asks her what happened and Josie is to upset to explain properly so Regaila gets her to transmit the memory of what happened to her and Regaila is pissed, she takes Josie over to Idelia’s house and leaves her there over night while she and Amias talk (fight).

Amias spends the time trying to convince Reagila to leave Josie and they can move to a new village and start a new life there, because Josie is dangerous and not even their child.

Regaila spends the time trying to convince him that Josie isn’t dangerous, and she is their new life. But Amias doesn’t agree and ends up saying that Josie is monster who attacked him, Regaila says she wasn’t trying to but Amias is insistent that she did it on purpose. Regaila ends up kicking him out of her house and telling him to find somewhere new to live, not even mentioning her pregnancy because she didn’t trust him with how hes treating Josie.

they try to convince each other to change their mind for several months, Josie staying with her family during the late nights that her parents are talking thinking to herself how she definitely ruined her parents marriage

at the end of the few months Regaila picks up Josie from Idelia's tent and takes her home telling her that "Amias is gone and he won't be able to treat her like that anymore, apologizing for not noticing sooner and telling her that she loves her, and no matter how many abilities she manifests she won't stop loving her" trying to hide the fact that she’s upset about it but Josie notices she’s upset and reads her mind and finds out about the conversation and gets upset again almost enough to inflict and Regaila tells her "it wasn’t her fault, but thats why she shouldn't read people's minds, sometimes you're not being told information to protect you"

[leonstamatis]

reasons to vote for jacob/moses/layna in the @blaseballshipbracket :

(listen. I can’t make you do anything. i almost didn’t submit them at all because they won’t make it all the way and it will lowkey devastate me when they lose. i’m not even offering rewards, because i want to save those for the more contentious battles later on. but, yknow, just for kicks, let’s make a case.)

my second-ever blaseball fic was about these three. it was the first ship that i thought of all on my own, and i was very nervous about putting them all out there.

since then, i’ve written 21k across four fics detailing their relationship through pretty much all of blaseball, up til gamma.

they quite literally have everything? i’m not even joking. moses was involved in the masoning before they came to the flowers. layna was on the beams when they fell into the hellmouth. jacob is a good enough player (or was before gamma rerolls) that he would almost certainly have been vaulted or at least gotten ego a couple times if not for the flowers’ insane lineup.

(moses and layna have sucked outrageously for most of their blaseball careers. that’s not related, it’s just infinitely funny to me.)

that’s not even all.

layna was sent over to the garages during an absolutely absurd three way swap in s12. later, while she was there, she also got alternated.

moses was a receiver, was temporary alternated, had an allergic reaction, watched quitter and wyatt mason vi die (while they were echoing elsewhere, actually! it pains me), and then, instead of staticking out, moses themself died! a regular incineration, at random!

jacob was mostly fine during all of this. he doesn’t experience much. that’s what makes him special. but he’s on the magic now! he fell to their shadows. i’ve given him a wizard hat, in my head.

layna was involved in the first major swap of the expansion era, and one of the biggest ones from discipline, too. moses was the first death on the flowers since cali. (it had been a little over ten seasons.) somehow, in picking three largely unconnected names off a roster to write about, i pulled some players who would have a lot of outside significance. (i did not know this at the time; it was season seven.)

there’s even a dramatic breakup at the end. i made a playlist about it. (there are annotations, too! password’s jacoblayna.)

and like look, i’m detailing all of this because I think the gameplay comes first in storytelling. i can talk about moses as a victim of the game and layna as a victim of the game and jacob as an extremely anxious, but largely untouched, guy, watching both of his loved ones experience tragedy over and over beyond any of their control.

but yknow, I think the fic actually explains their dynamic better than i can in a (relatively) brief post giving an overview. so i’m focusing on what happened to them canonically, and in the spirit of irm, allowing your brain to fill in the gaps of what that’s like for people who love each other.

point is, this may not be the layna you know or the moses you know, or even the jacob you know! but they’re good. and if you are undecided (or have perhaps been persuaded), you should vote for ‘em. because they’re good.

[jmtorres]

had a weird conversation today where I said Id gotten vaccinated for flu & covid (bivalent booster) and it knocked me flat and i slept for three days, and the guy i was chatting with thought i'd contracted the actual illnesses not been vaccinated

i think we have a reluctance to talk about normal vaccine effects--I don't even want to side effects, because you're deliberately setting off your immune system, this is what is supposed to happen. But because there's so much anti-vax bullshit we try to pretend vaccination is 100% positive and has no downsides and... I think that's actually more harmful in the long run, like people who may not have an opinion get a vaccine and the experience kinda sucks for a few days and they go "oh the anti-vaxxers were right!" well no they weren't, the vaccine is NOT worse than the disease, but it's not fun, that's true.

So it's always remotely possible you will have an allergic reaction to a vaccine, and this is why pharmacies ask you to hang around for 15 minutes after the jab to make sure you don't come down with hives or start having trouble breathing. This is really rare and if you've had all your childhood shots without a problem it's unlikely to affect you. But it's also why they ask you if you're allergic to any of the components of vaccines, like egg proteins, which, if you've got that allergy I'm sorry and you probably already know better than I do what vaccines you can have and what alternates are available to you. Anyway: an allergic reaction to a vaccine if you've never had one before is an abnormal problem and not one most people will ever deal with. But if you are worried, hang around the pharmacy for 15 minutes, they're equipped to help you if you do have an allergic reaction, and if you're going to have one it should happen in that time frame and you can stop worrying about it after.

But then: normal vaccine reactions. Many people get sore in the arm that was injected. This usually lasts a couple of days. I got two vaccines at once and opted to have them in the same arm so I only had one arm affected. It's really common to be fatigued the day or two after a vaccine, because your immune system is in overdrive. I ran a low-grade fever and flopped around adjusting my covers on and then off when it broke. Again, this is a normal immune response.

Some people are like that sounds like being sick, why bother getting vaccinated, why not just risk getting sick? Here's symptoms of the illnesses I got vaccinated for I got to skip the experience of:

runny nose, congestion, sore throat

headaches

full body aches

vomiting

diarrhea

fevers high enough to risk brain damage

difficulty breathing

hospitalization because you can't breathe

death

you think it won't happen to you but people do die of both covid and flu

not to mention long-term bullshit, I had a relatively mild case of covid a couple months ago and I'm still not up to my usual level of activity, plus I have scar tissue behaving super weirdly? and there are so many worse longterm covid effects ppl have reported. sense of taste or smell being permanently fucked up. lungs wonky for months. new blood pressure problems. worse fatigue.

so I got to avoid all that, and I got to choose when I wanted to deal with a couple of days of being too tired to do anything, so I could do it in a holiday weekend and not miss much.

Also, at no point was I contagious! I never risked giving even my minor miseries to other people!

And that's why I would rather get a vaccine and have a couple of sucky days while my immune system learns from it than get the actual disease.

Vaccines aren't fun. But in most cases they're better for you and for society than the disease they're preventing, and for those few people who have allergies or are immunocompromised in ways that prevent them from getting vaccinated, they're relying on as many of us who can get vaccinated to do so, to lower their risk of exposure. That's what herd immunity is and does--when the majority of a population is vaccinated, a disease can't spread through the population, so rare ppl who can't get vaccinated are protected.

Please get your vaccines! As of the beginning of September, 2022, in the US, this season's flu vaccine is out at pretty much all pharmacies, as well as the bivalent covid booster, which is supposed to protect against two common strains of omicron. Pharmacies can also handle all your standard childhood vaccinations and stuff like tetanus (you want a booster every ten years!) and HPV and others. Vaccines are preventative medicine so they're free under pretty much every insurance and government medical care.

[ID: "it's free real estate" meme edited to say "it's free healthcare!" end ID]

[mangodestroyer]

I think something that's always bothered me about society is just how cold it can be.

I mean, any time I've been distressed in some way, well, you'd think the natural reaction would be, "Oh, you're distressed. Will you be okay?" Nope! It either becomes an interrogation about WHY I feel that way, and people either not getting it and overcomplicating it (especially if it's related to existential dread or some horrible personal problem that can sometimes be related to abuse) or dismissing it as stupid, or not even asking and maybe just taking note of the fact that I am obviously someone who was born with a uterus, and so it must be those crazy girl hormones or whatever (misogyny is a beast that will just not die!)

If you get distressed a LOT, it's never seen as an indication of a pressing problem. You're just dramatic and like attention. Some people may even call you manipulative (usually a sign that they are a manipulative POS themselves when they project that onto you).

It might even be considered inappropriate in your close friendship to suddenly come forward about something that's a bit heavy. I've almost lost a friend admitting to something a bit heavy (they made it a point to act EXTREMELY disappointed in me), so I've since refrained from doing so.

So I haven't really found comfort from friends or family. What about romantic partners? They're supposed to be your number one supporter, right? Well, I've only had one. And I wouldn't exactly say that there was the deep, wholesome connection I thought there'd be, like there is in the books. In all fairness, I don't think they were serious about me and I have zero clue why they even wanted to date me because I just remember them being cold and distant the whole time, and not wanting to do ANYTHING that couples do. They showed zero enthusiasm upon seeing me, so obviously, they weren't very emotionally supportive either (they were the type to assume that crying=manipulation). Just, for whatever reason, wanted me to move in with them right away and get those adult responsibilities going (like having kids and all that), without actually forming a real connection. I mean, it was like this: they wanted marriage, even right when we started dating, but admitted at some point that we probably won't have a wedding. So in other words, nothing fun. No actual bonding experiences. No sign that they actually wanted to put effort into their relationship with me (while I was about ready to move with them to places I really didn't want to live, as well as do many things there way because they were allergic to doing anything my way). And now I'm afraid that this is just how relationships are. It doesn't sound REMOTELY appealing and I still haven't put myself out there again.

So in conclusion, human society seems kind of cold. Like, we just work to justify our existence, do random things to satiate our boredom, but only those of us who are lucky can actually form emotionally fulfilling relationships. Some of us just don't find that and are told to just deal with it. Like, we're not even allowed to be sad about it because it's "toxic" or whatever. Or we're told that we don't deserve it because we don't bring enough to the table, or that we aren't good enough, or that we must be terrible if people are emotionally distant with us.

Meanwhile, my dogs are always RIGHT THERE if I feel even remotely sad. They don't overcomplicate it or try to turn it into some elaborate thing. Just go, "Human sad, I'll make feel better!" and start getting affectionate. And funnily enough, it just works.

[automatismoateo]

Near death experience today. Debunked a Christian myth and am alive to talk about it. via /r/atheism

Near death experience today. Debunked a Christian myth and am alive to talk about it. Today I went in for allergy testing and they did a second round after the initial panel to double test the negative reactions. They did like a TB vaccine style injection just under the skin. Turns out I was extremely allergic to things and went into anaphylaxis. For me, it wasn’t like the movies where your throat just suddenly closes. It was a slow decent that gave me time to reflect on my mortality. 💀 I went from a small welt, a little mouth itching, and an allergy attack to: face, ear, neck, and tongue swelling with shortness of breath. Before I was administered steroids and then whisked to the ER for the epipen cocktail, I had that moment where I was thinking “well, this may actually kill me.” And as I gulped for air I wasn’t crying out to a man in the sky. I actually only wished to have my man I’m married to with me. That was it. I cried wishing he was there and didn’t have a single thought about what would be next or my salvation like my die hard Catholic upbringing made me think I would. My amazing mom came too, and she’s devout Catholic. It was actually hilarious because that experience made me even more set in my atheist ways; and my paperwork at the hospital was super old, stating I was Catholic. I asked the clerk to change that to nothing or atheist. My mom was like, oh no just say Catholic because wouldn’t you want someone there like a priest. And I was able to firmly say no, I’m atheist and I don’t need that but thank you for the concern. It felt good. Happily everything worked out. I know what my priorities are. Man in the sky isn’t my priority especially if he made me to get anaphylaxis from fucking birch and hickory pollen. Like, thanks for making me allergic to literal air. 🥴 That’d be enough to crush my faith if it wasn’t gone already. 💀 edit: Just gonna edit and clarify that I didn’t have an out of body near death experience in which I flatlined since people are saying what I had wasn’t an NDE. I consider it a near death experience as I did begin to actively die. Call it a brush with death if you prefer that phrasing. Regardless, I didn’t call out for god when facing my mortality, and that honestly made me so happy and I will now be able to refute that claim from first hand experience. Submitted October 18, 2023 at 01:14AM by __cat_cat_cat__ (From Reddit https://ift.tt/phzKM0b)

[hocusbogus]

The Double Agent

Author’s Note: I found this in my google doc, I wrote it on December 7 2015, I can’t help but read it from a third person POV because 2023 can’t remember being 2015 me, but these words were written by me.

I don’t know which part of the story was the twist. I wish I could just step back and watch my life unfold and be there during the “oohs" and “aahs” while people gasp at the things that others are doing behind my back or the things I said behind their back.

When I can no longer grasp reality, when the truth is too twisted and there are multiple versions of it, I can’t seem to digest it. Am I doing the right thing? Am I doing what’s good for me and those I care about? Or am I just as selfish and fucked up as those people we see on TV?

Maybe I am just pretending to be this self-righteous person to mask the truth that I am actually a horrible person. Just like I believe that everyone has the potential to be better than who people think they are, or what they are projecting to be, I also believe in people’s potential to be a monster.

You think murderers are horrible... rapists and sadists, all horrible. Yes, of course, they are. In ways that we were all taught what horrible is. Gruesome; it is blood, psychotic inhumane behavior, gore. What about those who hurt people for sports? Because it’s fun. What about those who pretend to care but actually don’t? What about the people who can’t pick sides and end up hurting both? They may not literally kill you, but they can kill you. In more ways than you can imagine.

In the quest of making everyone happy, to make myself happy, it felt like I was doing it with a double-edged sword. Except, I didn’t know it was a sword, I only saw flowers. So when I bleed, I think it’s a side effect of happiness, an allergic reaction to these beautiful flowers I am handing out to everyone who is willing to accept. Everyone else knew it was a sword, and the reason I am bleeding is because a double-edged sword hurt both, and thus as I swung it, it hit me as well. Or at least that's how I imagined it to be, you get the metaphors.

I was so convinced I was doing the right thing, maybe I have been doing the wrong thing all along. I have been trying to convince myself that I am doing this for them, none of it for me. Maybe my words weren’t truthful, or maybe it was and my words came back to haunt me. Maybe I ruined everything I touch, maybe I hurt too many in the past, that I can’t seem to know anything else. No, not maybe.

Of course, I deserve the pain. Of course, I deserve the guilt. People are falling apart because of me, and yet I still convinced myself that I’m there to catch them, to piece them back together. What if I am the one who tears them down? You can't just tear people down to build them back up again.

My love kills. It never heals. I should never open up to anyone and let anyone open up to me. We’re gonna end up pouring poison into each other and intoxicating ourselves with it. If we didn’t die from it, I’m sure everyone else we came in contact with would get poisoned as well.

I should stop touching people.

[jonssoneliasen]

Write Your Personal Personal Obituary Without Hesitation!

Since time passes so fast, you have to make every day count. One on the exercises I conduct in my seminars is the associated with writing your own obituary. What expenses written about you when you die? I challenge you to take a little bit and write your personal personal obituary. It doesn't need to say that you became President or that you taught me to be of world hunger. I noted this need to the social worker who communicated the request towards the boy's grandmother. It took several months, but the picture finally arrived regarding mail. Has been created an obituary card is not mother's picture on the front, the card that has become passed out at her funeral. the funeral program site I know you do not need one more thing over your to-do publish. However, this particular task is an individual which will buy from you back in new sales-revenues generated. That sort of payback is worthy of the time invested. Below are a few are the few opening lines of a newbie's cold-calling script. This the actual first is geared more towards those thinking about taking up a vegan lifestyle. This last week a couple was responsible for the death of their 11-month old who was being exclusively fed by her vegan wife. The autopsy cited that the child died from vitmain A and vitmain B12 deficiency, vitamins in ample quantity if meat-based foods. It really is alright get rid of food groups from your diet, but meat isn't right another one. Some people are lactose intolerant associated with difficult permit them to consume dairy, while others have an allergic reaction to gluten, a protein found in grain-based certain foods. If you are looking to cut a food group from a diet, begin with one of those. You may need to respect the deceased families' beliefs and wishes. Your site include their religious objectives. Most religions allow flowers to get delivered for the funeral home and also the burial site. Others though, Orthodox Jews for example, think about this rude. So in situation you would send them directly to your home. Will need to also avoid flower arrangements that are centered on the religious belief for very same reasons. This can especially true if you unaware of the religious beliefs and style. the funeral site At aged 40 however, Sister #3 went through a total transformation with her diet. She followed the most strict fast for several days. Then followed a 100% raw food diet with intermittent starting a fast. Sister #3 went through a dramatic shift. Her Eczema and Asthma been consumed. She experienced tip top health within one month. She showed love and kindness towards others absolutely no longer suffered any disorder. https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1jgI4oF0gndBxw-XyWtL_K1UWdX1Qckcg

Environmentally friendly . option you just have for locating a funeral poem will be write one yourself. Just not a lot of people will elect to do this because think that they're just it possibly be too stiff. In reality it is probably not any longer difficult than writing a eulogy properly lot of men and women will actually find it become easier. Obviously you aren't going to wish to write a poem unless an individual comfortable executing it but if you are it could be be a good option.

[vaciena]

(Can’t handle more than quick asks and dash games today, sorry. Tags are just a rant)

[luna-rainbow]

Steve's medical conditions

Today's thesis that no one ever asked for: I know there's been tons of meta on Steve's medical conditions already, but some of the terms on this list have been bothering me so I had to check them up myself. This is again more for my own record.

The TL;DR version:

The combination of asthma and sinusitis/chronic colds suggests Steve probably also had allergies, so take your pick

Asthma/sinusitis medications could be the culprits for "high blood pressure", "palpitations", and "nervous trouble"

Scarlet fever causes rheumatic fever which is a nasty disease that killed a lot of young people. It also causes chronic heart problems (that can include "palpitations" and "easy fatigability"), often shortened people's lifespans, and I don't blame Bucky for freaking out that the military might accept him.

"Nervous trouble" was poorly defined and could be from his heart condition, medications, or actual anxiety

You know that meme that said Steve why are you even outside the house, yes that's how it feels.

Warning: this is super long

Asthma, sinusitis, chronic or frequent colds

I want to draw attention to this first. Sinusitis/chronic and frequent colds sounds on the surface like an underactive immune system - and it could well be true. But the other (statistically more likely) possibility is that he's got a hyperactive immune system, i.e. allergic.

There is a phenomenon called the "atopy triad": asthma, eczema and hayfever. Kids who score this triad tend to be prone to a lot of allergies. Of interesting historical note is that atopic dermatitis wasn't described until 1933, so it's quite possible that Steve had this without being recognised, and he already has 2 of the 3 in the triad -- so even if he didn't have eczema he's still more likely than other kids to have allergies.

Allergies

Common allergic reactions:

Anaphylaxis (*)

Skin: hives and swelling

Gut: vomiting, tummy pain, diarrhoea

Airways: difficulty breathing, throat tightness, hoarse voice, wheeze, cough, tongue swelling

Heart: low blood pressure, dizziness or collapse, pale or floppy

(*) I just want to note here that the EpiPen was not invented until the 1980s, so uh...if you write an anaphylactic reaction make sure he's close to medical care because he would otherwise die within minutes. Adrenaline was patented in 1901. The earliest timepoint someone has given for cardiac arrest is in the 1960s. I'm having trouble finding when adrenaline was first used for anaphylaxis.

Common childhood food allergens:

Nuts: peanuts, sesame, tree nuts

Grains: soy, wheat, rice, oats

Milk - depending on type, may need to avoid all mammalian milk

Fruit and vegies

Seafood: shellfish, fish

Egg - note sometimes kids can tolerate baked egg in cookies and cakes, but not otherwise cooked or raw egg

Frequent colds/Rhinitis

Nasal decongestants ephedrine and pseudoephedrine were available in the 1920s, followed by amphetamines (Benzedrine) in 1930s, and their abuse was recognised soon after. All adrenaline-based meds are stimulants, which cause high blood pressure, palpitations and anxiety. Guess what else is on Steve's file? It is probably also important to note here that if Steve had any pre-existing heart problems (rheumatic fever being one of them - we'll get there), these side effects will hit hard.

Amphetamines were introduced in 1933 and was over the counter for 15 years. Apart from being used for the minor sniffle, it was also used for narcolepsy, Parkinsonism, chronic pain, obesity, low libido and depression (!!!). The US (and most other) military supplied it to servicemen during the war to help sustain their performance. German soldiers were using it to help dampen the emotional impact of committing atrocities.

Psychiatrists based at military prisons in 1945 were recording large numbers of agitated and hallucinating patients. It is quite possible that the Commandos would have used it on long missions; or even if Steve didn't need it because of the serum, he might have had to deal with soldiers suffering from the psychiatric side effects.

Asthma history and treatment

Even in the 1900s, it was well known that asthma had an environmental influence: food, dust, pollen/flowers, reflux were potential triggers -- so I imagine Sarah would have kept the house very clean and been cautious about Steve's food (as mentioned above).

The mainstay of asthma treatment in those days were anticholinergics, adrenergics, and PDE-inhibitors. These days PDE-inhibitors are rarely used, and steroids play a big part in asthma management. Coffee was also recommended for treatment of asthma in a 1914 textbook. This section got super long (mainly for my own sake) so the key takeaway is: all of these drugs cause some form of stimulation - restlessness, palpitations, irritability and nervousness.

Anticholinergics: the famous asthma cigarettes were available since the end of 1800s to the mid-1900s. They were tobacco with added belladonna alkaloids (anticholinergics) which open up the airways. These days it's been replaced by ipratropium (1980s). Hypodermic injections of pilocarpine was also introduced around 1910s.

(As an aside, sorry this is already getting long, opposition to the use of fumes and cigarettes for asthmatics were already growing in the 1920s, although it wasn't until the 1950s that a link between tobacco and lung cancer was demonstrated. Meanwhile the tobacco industry tried all sorts of strategies to maintain their relevance. I'm so glad they didn't show Steve smoking even if that would be historically accurate because they do not need the free promo.)

Phosphodiesterase inhibitors: Theophylline (syrup) were available in the 1920s and IV aminophylline in the 1940s. They're used these days only in severe asthma exacerbations because of significant side effects and interactions -- reflux, nausea/vomiting, irritability, lightheadedness and dizziness. They have a narrow therapeutic range and can lead to convulsions and arrhythmias.

Adrenergics: as mentioned earlier, adrenaline was available by the start of the century and was recommended for use in asthma in the 1920s as a subcutaneous injection. By 1947, medical textbooks documented inhaled adrenaline solution via nebuliser. Metered-dose inhalers of adrenaline and isoproterenol (beta agonist) were available in the mid-1950s, but a spate of deaths were linked to high dose isoproterenol. Salbutamol, the drug used today, was introduced in 1968.

Corticosteroids: not available until late 1940s and did not become standard therapy until 1970s.

Poorly managed asthma in early childhood leads to progressively worse lung function even into the adult years.

Scarlet fever and rheumatic fever

Scarlet fever is an illness that is caused by a bacterial infection. Rheumatic fever is an inflammatory condition that can develop if scarlet fever is not identified and treated early. (medicinenet)

The TLDR version: scarlet fever is strep throat, but killed a lot of kids in the pre-antibiotic days. Rheumatic fever happens a few weeks after an infection like scarlet fever from the body attacking itself by mistake. It usually leaves lasting damage to the heart and was a big cause of death in kids and young people.

The nerd version: there was no treatment for scarlet fever in the pre-penicillin days. All doctors could advise was to keep hydrated, nourished and keep the rooms ventilated. The epidemics in the 1800s mostly affected kids younger than 16 (>95%), and 42% of childhood deaths during the 1858 epidemic were due to scarlet fever. Interestingly, it hit both the affluent and labourers in equal measure.

Rheumatic fever affects: joints (arthritis), heart, central nervous system (chorea - more common in girls) and skin (nodules). It was the leading cause of death in the 1920s for age 5-20, and second only to TB in those aged 20-30. Childhood rheumatic fever accounted for about half of adult heart disease. Pre-antibiotic era mortality following rheumatic heart disease was 1.5%/year (UTD). Management was mainly salicylates (aspirin) and bed rest, often for weeks and sometimes months, at times needing to be in foster homes or specialised institutions.

Super jargony stuff ahead: rheumatic heart disease predominantly affect the valves (mitral and aortic), detectable as new murmurs. Pericarditis is less frequent (15%). Heart failure is usually due to severe valve disease (mainly MR). Chronic valve disease can proceed to heart failure, angina (from AR), AF, and strokes (MS has the highest risk, especially if concommittant AF). Valvulotomy for severe MS was first trialled in 1923 with the patient surviving for 5 years after, but was abandoned due to a string of failures and not done again until 1948.

Nervous trouble

At some point I want to look up mental health in the early 1900s, because I think that's probably more pertinent to Bucky's story and how he would perceive mental health treatment.

I'm having a lot of trouble finding a 1930s definition of "nervous trouble". There's even a record in the education papers that "stammering" was a nervous trouble. The closest I got was a 1922 paper which described something psychologically:

When the conditions of life are unfavorable and adverse, tending to further cultivation of the impulse of self-preservation and the fear instinct, the outcome is a psychopathic disposition, ending in a nervous state with typical symptoms of some definite nervous trouble, formed by the latest or ultimate fear experiences.

Another interesting quote was from the US army, where a WW1 soldier wrote 6 years after his concussion that he has improved but "the only time that I can notice any trace of nervous trouble is upon being excited over some happening or some loud noise at an unexpected time." -- Which to me sounds like the hypervigilance of PTSD, if not some persistent traumatic brain injury symptoms.

In any case, it's very likely that nervous trouble was referring to anxiety-like symptoms, which would include shortness of breath, palpitations, dizziness etc -- all of which can also occur with Steve's heart and lung problems as well as medications. This is not to say that Steve didn't have anxiety, only that he had a lot of other medical issues that could be misinterpreted as symptoms of anxiety.

There are definitely medical conditions not on his list that could cause anxiety-like symptoms - e.g. thyroid and adrenal problems, but people do poorly when untreated so it's less likely that Steve has them.

High blood pressure

This is getting into real guessing territory now. My preferred take is that Steve's high blood pressure is from medications, because most other things, without good medical treatment, is going to be life-limiting. High blood pressure at his age is very unusual and would be kidney issues until proven otherwise. That's a bad thing to have in those days especially if he's already got heart and lung problems. Again, it could be due to thyroid/adrenal problems, but less likely.

Easy fatigability

Like, aside from all the meds he's popping (or smoking), is there any reason he wouldn't feel tired?

But the other big causes? Anaemia and hypothyroid (underactive thyroid) -- and most common causes for these (in his situation) would be malnutrition. Prior to the 1920s, iodine deficiency was endemic in the US, and it's one of the most common causes of hypothyroid. Iodised salt was introduced in the Great Lakes region in 1924 which saw significant improvement in cases. Anaemia from nutritional deficiencies are commonly due to iron, B12 or folate.

What does this all mean?

Assuming he has no other weird conditions: his lungs aren't at full capacity, neither is his heart; if he overexerts himself he's probably kicking into palpitations. If he gets a bad cold, he's winded; if it grows into a pneumonia, he's out for days, with a real risk of dying because of no antibiotics. Medications he take for asthma and sinusitis will make him feel better in the lung but worse in the heart. His heart is a ticking time bomb and unless he's lucky, it's probably going to kill him in 10-20 years...and luck hasn't really been on Steve's side for most of his life.

Added to this is his financial status, which will impact on how he can access medications as well as his nutrition, housing, sleep and stress levels, all of which can directly worsen his health.

In a way, the only thing he had left to lose was Bucky, and now Bucky is going off to war.

[turing-tested]

Hal, I gotta know, what neuroses do you have that compel you to violently and vehemently reject the possibility that you might in fact have allergic reactions to food, or color blindness, etc. There’s nothing wrong with it, you’re not any lesser of a person for not having the Standard Human Body, but this is denial to a worrying degree. It’s like watching someone drive a car that has two flat tires and smoking out of the engine, while the driver just white-knuckle grips the steering wheel and insists that the car is driving buttery-smooth, pointedly ignoring the flames coming out of the hood. Seriously, you should probably talk to someone about this. If not a therapist, then at least a close friend. I’m not one to judge what is or isn’t an effective coping mechanism but as a long-time follower this is like… straight-up painful to watch you refuse to even consider it. Unless this whole bit is just irony where you’re just pretending to pretend that you’re not allergic, in which case… why tho

to me it's more like I have a 2012 Subaru Zillyhoo and I'm like 'yes this car is just a little fucked up in different ways bc the manufacturer had never made a car before and didn't take the best care of it and I got it used but also checked out at a mechanic and it doesn't really quit on me, it's just got super weird features like it tells you that the song on the radio sucks and sometimes it changes color' and everyone's like 'your car changes color? you need to get that checked out' and im like. no but like that doesn't affect its ability to drive at all. and someone's like 'but cars shouldn't do that' and I go 'yes but mine does because it's a weird fucked up car that runs mostly fine and the color changing thing again does not affect any internal mechanisms'

and then I'm like 'sometimes when I drive over gravel it stretches out long ways' and people are like 'that sounds like a suspension issue,' and I go 'but aren't suspension issues normally like this?' and they go 'yes' and I go 'my car doesn't do that. it just gets longer' and they're like. 'so a suspension issue' but im missing a vital component of the Suspension Issue and if I go in to a mechanic they ARE just going to be like 'ok well is your car getting longer impacting your life' and I go 'not really. its kind of weird but it's not impacting any ability to drive I just have to drive a little differently' and the mechanic says 'yeah, you're right, I can't actually do anything about your car getting longer. sometimes people just have weird cars that get longer but I can't just make it not do that at cost that's reasonable especially if it's not fucking up anything'

but on top of that I think it's funny to be like 'no, all cars get long on gravel' and see my friends be like 'hal my car has never gotten longer' and I'm like hm! sounds like you just don't have a Honda Zillywho. MY car gets longer, and yours probably does too, you just don't notice it. besides. plenty of people tell me that their cars get longer and their cars are mostly fine'

its half joke and half not joke. its like ironic irony. i have many idiosyncrasies in my brain and body that do make me different from average person but I do get a joy out of saying things that may or may not be true. i love to live in a reality slightly to the left in many ways that doesn't actually impact my ability to function in every day life. part of the fun is just going online and living the equivalent of my kin list where I tell you that three of them are lies and it's your opportunity to figure out which ones aren't true. and also it makes my friends and me laugh

also ive considered it and it's just again like. 'you have this' 'but I don't experience this aspect of what you're saying I have' 'but you still have it' 'yes but I don't x and this thing you're saying kind of needs x, you can't have it if you just have 0.x' and a combination of that and being pedantic. that and I know my own limits and I am not going to die from eating mangos or rice and bring ridiculous is part of the way that i express myself as well

[goddess-of-green]

More Tobi please !!! It’s so good 😫🙌 I love ur writing so much 😊

I'm running out of Tobi gifs you guys (Part 2 here!)

Warnings: Language, suggestive themes, submissive reader

"Yay! It must be Tobi's lucky day!" Tobi exclaimed as he threw down his cards—his winning cards.

You paled.

This generally wouldn't be such a problem.

Sure, Tobi was suspiciously good at Poker when he needed to be, but you never minded when he beat you by a landslide and proceeded to gloat until one of the other Akatsuki members had to shut him up.

Although, since you didn't really want to wager money on the game -your savings had been dwindling recently and you jumped at any opportunity to save some extra Ryo- you and Tobi decided to instead, make a bet.

If you won, Tobi would be at your beck and call for 24 hours; if Tobi won, you would be at his beck and call for 24 hours.

You knew such a bet could go either horribly wrong or horribly right.

However, you hadn't really let the implications of being at Tobi's beck and call hit you until you saw that winning hand.

Tobi was completely unpredictable and a known troublemaker.

He was always 'innocently' finding ways to insult people or taunt them. You were fairly sure he had some weird sadistic hobby to see how far he could bend people before they reacted violently.

You and Tobi had meshed so well in the organization because you were extremely patient and always reacted positively to Tobi's teasing and jabs.

After a while, Tobi seemed to realize that his taunting and teasing wouldn't make you upset, so he claimed you as his "best friend" and took to following you around in his freetime, you being the only one who could handle his overbearing and deliberately annoying nature.

Tobi loved to cause trouble and make fun of people. Despite his 'innocent' nature, you knew his humor was a little twisted at best.

What the hell did I get myself into?

Tobi was giggling like madman at your expression, a hand raised to where his mouth would be to ineffectively muffle his snickers.

"Y/N-Chan's time starts now! She has to be Tobi's maid for a whole day!" Tobi cheered, throwing his arms up into the air.

You blinked.

Maid?

Fuck.

"M-Maid?" You asked, already knowing that no matter what he responded with you were screwed.

Tobi giggled a bit more, "Yep! Tobi's even got Y/N-Chan a cute little outfit to wear while she does everything Tobi desires~" Tobi explained, his amusement coming off him in waves.

Maid? 'Cute little Outfit'? Tobi's desires!? God, help me.

You sighed, "Very well, Tobi."

"Actually, Y/N-Chan...there's something else Tobi would like you to call him~"

::

Here you are, dressed in a maid outfit.

A frilly black and white choker secured around your neck and your hair down, your top doing nothing to hide your cleavage, and your skirt giving you about two inches of leeway.

If you so much as bent over, your panties would be revealed to anyone in the vicinity. To top it all off, you had a white waist apron with little frills on the ends.

It covered even less than your skirt.

Kami, where did I go wrong? What did I do to deserve this?

Your internal lamenting is brought to halt as you hear Tobi cooing at you.

"Y/N-Chan~ you look so nice, all dressed up for Tobi like this~" He put his gloved hands on your hips, pulling you closer to him as he continued to inspect your form.

You swallowed, "Thank you, Tobi~Sama." You said softly, as he had requested you call him.

You blushed in embarrassment as you said it, unintentionally making yourself look even cuter as you looked up at him through your lashes, hoping he wouldn't make fun of you.

Tobi was unusually silent as he stared at your inadvertently coy expression. His hands still on your hips, and his expression unreadable through his mask.

After a moment, he started giggling.

"Y/N-Chan is such a good little maid for Tobi~ Tobi has a feeling he's going to enjoy this very much~" Tobi purred as he brought his arms up to wrap around your waist and buried his masked face into your neck; his body snuggling into yours in the process.

You gulped as his warm body encased yours.

Is it just me or is it a little hot in here?

You would have tugged on your collar if you had one.

Tobi pulled away from the embrace with excitement as he grabbed your hand.

"Alright Y/N-Chan, you're going to make some for lunch for your master, and then we're going to play a game~" Tobi said brightly, a teasing tone slipping through his usual beaming attitude.

Something about the way Tobi said "game" raised some flags, but you complied nonetheless.

You certainly didn't want to give Tobi a reason to punish you, as he had warned.

You shuttered at the implications.

He didn't mention or signal any sort of sexual things happening, but you could never be too careful. This entire situation was more than a little suspicious.

He's already made it clear he's got a pervy side, if the outfit was anything to go by.

You sighed lowly as Tobi's hand slipped from yours and he wandered off to wait in the living area of the base while you prepared him something to eat.

"It's too bad Tobi has his mask, or he would love to have Y/N~Chan feed him~" Tobi sighed wistfully as he walked off.

Clearly talking to himself, but you were sure he meant for you to hear.

You blushed at the thought, shaking your head to rid yourself of such thoughts as you continued on your way to the Akatsuki base's kitchen.

After you finally washed your hands and got to actually making something for Tobi, you ran into a little roadblock.

You had no idea what kind of food Tobi liked, or even if he had any allergies. He rarely ever ate around you, and when he did you tried not to stare at him too much and respect his privacy.

(Even though you were definitely curious as to what lied underneath his infamous orange mask.)

Even if you had paid attention, you doubt you would have caught much anyway.

Tobi is very sneaky when it comes to keeping his face hidden, and his food is off the plate and in his mouth faster than anyone can even tell what he was eating.

"He's so annoying all the time, yeah! The least he could do is let me catch a glimpse of his damn mug for once, un!"

You smirked as you recalled Deidara's ranting.

Remembering your situation, your smirk slipped away as you considered your options.

You could take a stab in the dark and make something that Tobi may or may not like, or you could go back out and ask Tobi what he wanted.

Neither were very good options.

If you took a wild guess then you would risk Tobi either not liking what you made or having an allergic reaction to it.

The last thing you wanted was to make Tobi sick or unhappy, but going back out to ask posed its own risks.

If you went out into the living room to ask Tobi what he wanted to eat then there was a good chance one of the other members would see you.

Then, they would ask questions.

You knew that Tobi wouldn't hesitate to embarrass you and go into great detail about how you were his cute little maid who would do anything to "satisfy" him.

Your face heated up in embarrassment just thinking about it.

You sighed, biting your lip as you ran through the pros and cons in your head.

You wilted after a moment, your morality winning the internal battle.

Discarding your dignity, and swallowing the last of your pride, you turned around to exit the kitchen and go find Tobi.

::

"But D-Deidara-Senpai! Tobi's not lying! He swears!" Tobi exclaimed, waving his hands around wildly as if that helped his case.

"Tch. Sure Tobi, un. You really expect me to believe that you got Y/N to be your maid?" Deidara scoffed.

It was then that you peaked from the hallway. Calling Tobi's name and desperately hoping that he was alone.

"Ah! Y/N-Chan! Impeccable Timing~!" Tobi said happily, Deidara snapping his head over towards you to see if Tobi really wasn't lying.

Uh oh.

Your face flamed as you tried to retreat back into the hallway, Tobi one step ahead of you, grabbing your wrist and pulling you into the living area for Deidara to see.

Deidara's eyes widened as he looked over your form, clad in a skimpy maid outfit complete with the lacy little headdress on top.

Deidara slowly but surely flushed, before turning to Tobi.

"I want in." Deidara said earnestly.

Your face flamed and you literally wanted to die in a hole of pitiful embarrassment.

Completely appalled, Tobi gasped quite dramatically at Deidara's words and pulled you close, as if protecting you. "Deidara-Senpai! You can't! Y/N-Chan is Tobi's maid! And Tobi doesn't think you would appreciate her like Tobi does!" Tobi said indignantly as he snuggled into your chest.

Good lord, you felt like your face was permanently pink today. From all this excitement you had nearly forgotten what you came out to ask-

"What?! Tobi! You can't keep her all to yourself like this! You're being selfish!" Deidara yelled.

"Nuh-uh senpai! Tobi won Y/N-Chan's free will fair and square! And why would Tobi share? This way she's all mine~" Tobi exclaimed, trailing off into a creepy giggle at the end.

It's like they're two kids fighting over a new toy... You sighed.

You blushed when you realized that you were the toy.

Before Deidara could fire back or you could finally ask what the hell Tobi wanted to eat, something awful happened.

Hidan walked in.

It took him five seconds to skim his eyes over your form, Tobi's face pressed into your chest and Deidara blushing... and burst into laughter.

"Pfft Hahahaha, what the hell kind of kinky shit is going on in here?" Hidan howled, bent over and holding his stomach from laughter.

Tobi hurriedly let go of you and turned around, putting his arms in front of you as if to hide you. "Nothing Hidan-Senpai! Y-You don't have all the information!" Tobi exclaimed, his slightly shaky voice not convincing anyone.

"Tch. Tobi got Y/N to be his maid, and he's keeping this opportunity all to himself!" Deidara scoffed, crossing his arms indignantly.

Interest piqued, Hidan walked over to you, promptly pushing Tobi out of the way and grabbing your jaw.

"His maid, huh? And just how'd he manage that...?" Hidan said, his voice quieter and more husky since he was so close to your face.

You tried to repress the shiver that threatened to crawl down your spine...Hidan had always creeped you out.

Before you could stutter out a response, you felt a stinging on your ass.

Oh my-

He pinched my ass!

You squeaked involuntarily and pushed Hidan off you, Deidara starting to fume as he realized what happened.

"Hey man! Don't touch her like that, un!" He exclaimed, though he probably wanted to do the same thing.

"Hidan!" Tobi gasped, rushing over to pick you up bridal style and cradle you in his arms.

"No one is allowed to touch Y/N-Chan like that! She is Tobi's!" He exclaimed, and you would have been happy for his defense if he didn't keep referring to you as 'his'.

Deidara and Hidan were now straight up fighting, Tobi's yelling falling on deaf ears.

The lewd things Deidara and Hidan were saying about you as they fought had you desperately hiding your burning face in Tobi's chest.

Tobi pet your hair in a soothing manner before running off, with you still in his arms.

"It's too dangerous out here with all the other members! Y/N-Chan will just have to serve Tobi in his room! Alone~"

Lunch completely forgotten, you worried for what was to come as Tobi carried you off, Deidara and Hidan still wrestling on the floor.

It was then that Kisame and Itachi walked in, just in time to hear Tobi's exclamation as they saw you being carried off by Tobi while Deidara and Hidan were rolling around the floor and pulling at each other's hair.