#and Yes i am going to start a New painting tomorrow

[allbeendonebefore]

(sets the candle down and materialises a cup of decaf tea) so anyways after being very ill and then subsequently being possessed to catalogue, reorder, rebox and label every single cd, dvd and video game I could find in the house (successfully) I'm feeling quite refreshed so I'm going to finally go out tomorrow and get bubble tea or something you guys want anything while I'm out you just let me know

[dreaming-medium]

Stray Kids Kinktober Day 6

Stray Kids Kinktober Masterlist

Frottage - Bang Chan

Word Count: 8.8k

Summary: Being an award winning actress isn’t as easy as some might think. Award shows themself are one of the more difficult events to tackle. But luckily, during this ceremony, you get to meet some of your favorite idols, and they get to meet their favorite actress.

—————————————————————

“And after the awards ceremony there’s an after party at The Plaza.” Your agent’s voice is strictly business in the back of the limousine. 

You’re playing with the fabric of your gown while absentmindedly listening to her. 

“Do I have to be on set tomorrow?”

“Yes, your call is at 9:00 AM. Transportation will be at your hotel at 7:30.”

You groan and look up at the ceiling. “Why do they always put these award shows on weekdays?”

“Your weekends aren’t exactly free anymore, either.” 

Yes, you’re aware. 

The life of an actress was not easy. Especially an award winning one. Right now, you are the hot, new, up-and-coming actress that everyone has their eye on. The actress that every director wants in their movie, their TV show, their commercials– everything.

Currently, you’re in the middle of filming a TV show that has a high fantasy aesthetic to it. You’re the main role in the show, the main badass warrior that everyone roots for. The kind of character that has a million and thirty Tik Tok edits of her.

It’s one of those shows where your character is constantly going through the wringer. The amount of bruises that you have to sport on camera increases each day; real and fake. 

Your nerves begin to creep up on you the closer you get to the award venue. 

Red carpets were one of the hardest parts of the job. Memorizing lines? Easy. Learning blocking and fight choreo? You do that every day. 

Talk to strangers and pose for pictures? No, thank you. 

Who were you wearing again?

“This dress is Gucci, right?”

“No, it’s Christian Siriano. I’m glad you asked. Your jewelry is Gucci and your shoes are Prada.”

You stare at your agent blankly, she hasn’t looked up from her tablet once. You were not made for this part of the job.

“Jesus…” you sigh and lean back into the cushioned seat. 

“While we’re at it, do you even know what award you’re up for?”

“Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series, right?”

“And?”

“And?” you repeat incredulously. “I thought I was only up for one!”

Finally, your agent looks up with a smirk. “Trick question, you passed. Proud of you.”

You can’t help but laugh and look out the window. “You know I’m nervous as all hell, don’t test me.”

“Don’t be nervous. I’m sure you have this in the bag.”

“That’s exactly what I’m nervous about. I have to get up, walk up those stairs in these Gucci—“

“Prada.”

“Prada shoes. And then make an acceptance speech in front of everyone. Millions of people. No pressure.”

She laughs and looks down at her tablet again. “You’re very charming and everyone loves you, you can talk the paint off a wall, Y/N, just be yourself.”

Grumbling, you cross your arms over your chest. But you can’t sit still in that position for too long at all. You’re too fidgety. 

In front of you, there’s a chilled bottle of champagne. You pour it into one of the flutes and sip it entirely too fast for the quality of the drink. ‘Sip’ is putting it gently, you down it. 

A second glass is poured, but you choose to hold that one in your hand tightly. Absent-mindedly, you swirl the champagne around, watching the bubbles form and pop up at the top. 

A few moments of silence pass, you begin to mutter to yourself to ease the stress. “Christian Siriano dress, Gucci jewelry, Prada shoes. Christian Siriano dress, Gucci jewelry, Prada shoes..”

The crowd starts getting louder the closer you get to the event. Cameras are already flashing outside your limousine. 

“I haven’t even told you who’s going to be there.”

Your agent sounds extremely smug all of a sudden. When you look over at her, there’s a cocky smirk on her face. 

“Who?” With that look, you’re not even sure that you want to know the answer. 

“Maybe put the drink down before I tell you. Wouldn’t want you to spill it on your…”

“Christian Siriano.”

“Christian Siriano dress.”

After downing the contents once more, you put the glass down. 

“Okay, who?”

Her smile grows even wider. “You know Stray Kids, right?”

Your face pales, even under all that makeup all the color drains from your skin. 

“They’re going to be there?”

She knows, she knows you’ve been a fan for a while. You were a Stay before fame came your way. 

Your agent smiles and nods, the light from her tablet illuminating her face. 

“Don’t play with me,” your voice is strained. “That’s mean.”

You’ve been keeping your admiration of them on the down low for so long. Now that you’re in the public eye, you have to be very low key about things. 

It was killing you. 

“They did a soundtrack song for a show, it’s up for an award.”

You were nervous before. Now you’re downright hysterical. 

“They’re going to be there? All eight of them?”

“To my knowledge, yes.”

The limousine comes to a gradual stop. The screams outside are deafening, even through the car doors. 

“Will I see them?” You ask, gathering your skirt up to try and assist with a graceful exit out of the limo. 

“Probably!” There’s a little hint to her voice that you can’t quite put your finger on. What is she doing? What does she know? 

The driver comes around the limousine and you take a deep breath, activating your celebrity face. 

It’s never hard for you to muster a genuine smile. You’re humble about your life, you know how lucky you are. Thinking about how far you’ve come is all the motivation you need to let the corners of your lips perk up.

“Ready?” Your agent asks.

“Yes, ma’am!”

The door opens and the roar of the crowd goes insane. You’re practically blinded by the flashes of the cameras. 

You do your very best to keep a level head and follow the instructions of the security team around you. 

In the meantime, as you walk into the venue, you turn and smile at the fans behind the barricades. 

Sending them hand hearts, waving enthusiastically back at them. You look up at your head security guard.

“Can I please go sign a few autographs?”

He looks down at you, obviously annoyed. But annoyed in the fatherly way. Just by the look on his face, you knew he was going to say yes. 

You quickly pick up your skirt and walk over to the barricade. The screams get louder and louder the closer you get. 

“Hi! Hi!” You greet all the fans as they scream for you. So many different objects are thrust over the fence for you to sign. 

You grab a marker and begin leaving your signature over everything in sight: posters, shirts, books. 

Several selfies are taken with you. Every single fan is so sweet and kind that you can’t help but spend extra time with them. 

They reach out and grab your hands, you hold them back and have conversations with them. 

You always do this. It’s something you’re very well known for. 

“Miss Y/N.” your security guard says gruffly behind you. 

“Okay, okay. I gotta go, guys. It was so nice meeting you, and it was nice seeing you again!” You point to a fan that you recognized from a convention you attended a few months ago. 

After blowing a few more kisses, you leave the barricade and head towards the red carpet. 

If it was up to you, you would’ve stood there and talked with your fans all day and never gone into the awards ceremony. They’re the reason you’re here, after all. 

Walking along the carpet, you plaster a smile on your face and wave to all the photographers. You stand still right in the middle of the space and strike several different practiced poses. 

You make sure to look in all different directions and show off the dress hugging your body beautifully. 

It’s a dark yellow gown with huge puffed sleeves that sit off your shoulders. The center of the gown dips down to show off your cleavage. The rest of the skirt poofs out in a princess style. 

It’s absolutely gorgeous. Crafted to show off your body in the best way.

All the photographers call out your name, all of them trying to get your attention. 

You wave to several that you recognize and say hello to others. 

Your short minutes on the red carpet run out and you quickly make your way across to the other side to link arms with your agent. 

She pats your arm, “Great job! Now for the hard part.”

On the other side of the red carpet there are several different magazines, websites, and other fashion sources lined up with interviewers stationed in front of cameras. 

“I studied for this, remember?” you tease her and hug her arm closer before letting go. 

The first interview you do is with Vogue, they had grabbed your attention so fast you almost got whiplash. 

How’s the show? Who are you wearing? Are you nervous about tonight?

These are all questions you prepared for.  

Next interview was with Vanity Fair. You had recognized the interviewer, so you approached her first. 

“Y/N!” Her face lights up when she sees you.

“Hi!” you answer just as cheerfully, wrapping her in a big hug and then holding her out at arms length. “How have you been?”

“So good, you?”

“Can’t complain– busy. I’m so glad to see you!”

“Me too! Do you have time for an interview?” She asks hopefully. 

“I always have time for you.”

She says thank you and her camera man gets into place. A second microphone is handed to you. Before you can blink, she’s in interview mode. 

You smile and listen to her introduction.

“I am here with, Y/N L/N, star of the Emmy award winning show, Kings and Pirates. How are you doing tonight, Y/N?”

You lift the microphone up to your mouth and speak into it happily. “I’m doing great, thank you! Always a pleasure to be talking with you on the red carpet.”

“You flatter me, Y/N! Now tell us the obvious question here: Who are you wearing?”

“I am wearing an original Christian Siriano dress, Gucci jewelry, and Prada shoes.”

“The entire outfit is beautiful! An amazing dress to hopefully show off when you win Best Actress tonight…?”

You laugh humbly. “I don’t know, there are so many amazing actresses nominated tonight. A girl can hope, but when I see the other names around mine, I can’t help but be anxious.”

The interviewer opens her mouth to ask another question, but the crowd absolutely erupts in cheers. Louder than when you got out of your limo, louder than some concerts you’ve attended. 

“Oh my god, I think someone important just showed up.” You joked into the microphone. 

Both you and the interviewer are looking across the carpet, craning your necks to see if you can get a glimpse of whoever just stepped out. 

“Minho! Hyunjin! Felix!” Crowd members scream out several names and your heart rate skyrockets. 

“Oh my god, it’s Stray Kids.” You accidentally say into the mic. 

“Oh wow! Are you a Stay?” She asks you. Your head whips around and a dark blush covers your cheeks. 

Laughing nervously, you look down at the ground, suddenly sheepish. “Ah… well, yeah. I’ve been a fan of theirs for years now.”

“Did you know they were going to be here tonight?”

“I was told it was a possibility, but I didn’t want to get my hopes up.”

Joke after joke makes the interviewer and her cameraman laugh. 

The interview continues without a hitch. But the entire time all you want to do is turn around  and see if you can catch a glimpse of Stray Kids. 

Yes, you’re famous. But you’re just a Stay at heart. 

You say your goodbyes with the interviewer and turn to move onto the next one. 

A gasp catches in your throat as soon as you step away. 

All eight of them are right there, doing their own interview with Buzzfeed. They’re smiling and laughing about something. 

You’re just able to stare. They’re right there. You’ve never been in the same space as them. 

Act professional, Y/N! Stop acting like a fangirl, you’re literally on the clock right now!

Their laughter is contagious and you find yourself smiling as you turn away and walk to another interviewer trying to flag you down. 

“… excited to maybe meet tonight? You guys are usually at music award shows, so this is definitely new for you! There’s some new faces that you probably have never seen before.”

“We actually were just talking about this on the ride over,” Chan says to the interviewer, ever the front man. “We’re all huge fans of Kings and Pirates, we watch it together every week when new episodes come out. We joked that it would be an amazing opportunity to say hi to Y/N L/N.”

It’s like the red carpet is pulled right out from underneath your feet. 

“But that would be like trying to get a private conversation with royalty, you know?”

You? They want to meet you? They watch your show? Every week? Together? 

“I think I just saw her around…” the interviewer trails off, by her tone you can tell she’s looking around for you. 

Act casual, Y/N. Pretend like you weren’t listening to every word of their interview closely. Act normal for once in your life.

“Ah, no way.” Chan’s thick accent reaches your ears. He sounds so shy by his tone. Several other members murmur and tease one another. 

“Oh, there she is! Y/N!” The interviewer grabs your attention— she technically already had it. 

The members begin to get louder when you turn your head to look at the entire group of them staring at you. 

When your eyes meet all of theirs, each of them freeze like a deer in headlights. Do they even know who they are?

You can’t tell if you’ve gone sheet white or bright red. Your heart is beating so fast it might explode. 

The interviewer waves you over, you look over at the other one you were walking to and hold up a finger to say ‘one moment’ before walking over to the large group of them. 

“Hi, hi!” You cheer casually when you come up next to them. 

All right members look absolutely starstruck. Jeongin’s eyes look like they might bug out of his head. 

They all bow politely when you join the group. 

Chan’s bow is a second later than everyone else’s. He’s too busy staring in absolute disbelief. 

“Y/N! It’s so nice to see you!” the interviewer says. You think you recognize her from another event. 

“You as well,” you respond with a beautiful smile.

“Let’s get you a mic— oh, we have no more— maybe someone— can share?”

Chan is the member closest to you, he immediately angles the mic your way. He does it so fast and eagerly it almost hits right into you. 

You giggle and thank him, “Thank you! It’s good to see you too,” you repeat and step a bit closer to him to make sharing easier. 

He smells so good. You can feel his body heat radiating onto your bare shoulders. Thankfully, the outdoor chill isn't affecting you much due to your adrenaline being so high. 

“Y/N, before I ask anything else, I do need to ask who you’re wearing.”

“Oh, a Christian Siriano original with accessories by Gucci and shoes by Prada.”

“Absolutely stunning,” the interviewer compliments. 

A light giggle comes from your chest and you go to thank her. It’s under his breath but you hear Chan say something along the lines of ‘that’s an understatement.’

“I did call you over here for a specific reason, besides the fact that we would love to interview a nominee for Best Actress. It seems you have eight fans all eager to meet you!”

You turn and look over at the members with wide eyes. “Oh my god!” You say out loud and your hand flies to your chest. “I am literally honored!”

“You know Stray Kids?” The interviewer asks. 

Well, if they already said they were fans… 

You lean down into the mic and laugh, “I have been a Stay for so long, are you kidding?”

Every single one of them don shocked expressions. Chan goes stiff as a board. 

You look at each of them with one of the most gorgeous smiles across your face. “When I was called over here with you guys I thought I was going to pass out. I had your discography playing in the room while my stylists got me ready.”

All eight of them move around like little kids meeting their idols for the first time. They each stare at you with literal stars in their eyes. 

“The first album that caught my attention was In Life, actually. Haven is my favorite song.”

You rain compliment after compliment down on them.

“It’s truly an honor to meet you, we’re all such huge fans.” Felix is the one that breaks the silence into the mic. The rest of them all nod eagerly. 

“Since we’re all fans of Kings and Pirates,” the interviewer brings your attention back. “Do you think you could give us a small spoiler for the new season coming out?”

“Ah,” you laugh and look around a bit, sucking your teeth in thought. “I reaaally shouldn’t, but…” You look to the side to make eye contact with all the members but Chan’s piercing gaze is the one that stole your breath away. 

His stylist had done his hair in such a natural, curly way. Every single strand is sitting perfectly on his head. The makeup on his face highlights his features angelically. 

Especially that beautiful nose of his. 

Each of them wore black tie suits with a bit of personal flair on them. Chan’s entire suit, including the undershirt and tie, was black. 

It takes a moment for your brain to reboot, not that anyone noticed. To them, it just looked like you were thinking of a small spoiler to give away. 

“I think that fans can look forward to seeing an old face that we previously had to say goodbye to.”

Jeongin eagerly grabs Han’s arm and says something in his ear. The two of them start whispering about what the spoiler could possibly mean. 

The rest of them all move around anxiously. Except Chan. He continues to stare at you with his lips parted slightly. 

You hold his eye contact for one more moment before looking back at the interviewer with a sinfully sweet smile. 

“Wow!” She says over-dramatically on purpose, “I think us fans have a lot to look forward to. Best of luck to all of you with your nominations tonight!”

“Thank you so much!” You chirp into the mic and stand there with a smile while she does her required sign off to go back to the main camera back in LA. 

During those few moments, you feel Chan shift his weight so that his entire arm brushes against yours. Goosebumps immediately fly up your shoulder and through your neck. 

It takes every muscle in your body not to react to it.

He’s still holding the mic between the two of you just in case you need to speak again. You want to turn your head and look at him so badly. 

You want to talk to him in the worst way; ask him questions about the music, even just how his day is, anything. 

The cameras cut and you instantly let out a sigh of relief, next to you, you see the eight of them deflate a bit too. 

The interviewer says her thanks and the crew takes the mics back from everyone. 

“It really was a pleasure meeting you guys,” you say with your hand on your heart again. “Words cannot describe how honored I am to be talking to you all.”

“Are you kidding?” Chan jokes. “We all feel the same way. I don’t think we even thought we would be able to stand near you tonight.”

You laugh and see your agent signaling you out of the corner of your eye. 

“Bah! I’m just a girl, really! Best of luck to you guys tonight, I’ll be cheering extra loud from the crowd when you win!”

“The same goes for us,” Chan smiles. He sticks his hand out and you immediately grab it. 

Electricity shoots up your arm and you have to bite your cheek to keep yourself from screaming. 

Your hands shake and you say your goodbyes to each of the members before walking away to your next interview. 

As soon as they think you’re out of earshot, they all begin talking rapidly to one another about you. 

“Can you believe it?”

“She’s a Stay!”

“Oh my god, I think I blacked out, did that really happen?”

“You lucky bastard, you got to shake her hand and share your mic with her.”

“Stop acting like a middle schooler.”

Their voices fade into the background the further you get from them. You just can’t help but smile and look down at the floor sheepishly. 

---------------------------------------

“I’ll find you after the awards show, okay, hon?” Your agent catches your attention as you walk into the auditorium. 

She grabs both of your forearms lightly and kisses your cheek. “Best of luck to you, don’t make yourself look stupid on stage.”

That last part is whispered into your ear and it makes you laugh. “I won’t! I won’t!”

She says her goodbyes once more and you look up at the usher waiting for you. 

This award show has its nominees all sitting around large dinner tables. There’s about ten people per table. 

For your show, you were the only one nominated for an award tonight, so not even your director or crew was here to sit with you. 

The usher held out his arm for you to take and you did so with a gracious smile. There’s a reason you’re known for charming everyone you meet. 

He leads you through the vast room. Several fellow actors call your name and greet you, and you respond to each one happily. 

“Here we are, Miss Y/N.”

No way. Absolutely no way. 

Seated around the entire table are the eight members you saw mere minutes ago, their manager taking the ninth seat. 

Sure enough, your name is printed on a sign draped over the back of the chair. 

Minho looks up at you first and waves sheepishly. You immediately wave back.

If Lee Minho waves, you wave back. 

“Hi again!” You greet them all before turning up and gently laying a hand on the usher’s bicep to thank him. He bows his head once and walks off. 

Chan, who was seated next to your empty chair, practically springs out of his seat and stands next to you. 

“I can’t believe this,” you tell him with a wide smile. He mirrors it and holds his hand out to the chair. 

You laugh while he grabs the back of it and pulls it out from the table. 

It takes a little bit of special maneuvering, but you manage to fold your poofy skirt down in order to sit down. Chan pushes your chair back in and takes his seat next to you. 

He now sits on your left, Seungmin on your right. 

“I guess I would’ve met you guys tonight regardless, then!” 

“It seems that way,” Chan answers. He reaches up and rubs the side of his neck with his hand. 

Now, from years of being a fan, you know that’s a nervous tick of his. And with your friendly nature, all you want to do is soothe him. 

“It’s like I’m getting a deluxe, VIP fan meeting. When Stay watches the award ceremony they’re all going to put a bounty on my head.” 

They all laugh and you turn to look at Seungmin, “Can I have an autograph before I die? I didn’t bring any of my albums with me, though.”

He laughs at your joke and your heart smiles with his beautiful grin. 

“I knew I should’ve brought a photocard with me.”

Behind you, Chan shifts around. “You bought our albums?”

You turn back to him, “Of course I did. I wanted to support you guys. Best way to do that is streaming your music and buying the albums, right?”

“Yeah,” he answers nervously, his bottom lip pulling between his teeth. “Yeah, you’re right. Just didn’t think I’d ever meet a celebrity I admired and find out they’re a Stay.”

You giggle and lean forward on the table. “I hope that’s not weird. I think I would’ve exploded if I didn’t tell you guys how big of a fan I was.”

“Not weird at all, just unexpected.”

“I guess I feel the same way, especially after hearing that you guys watch the show.”

“We love the show!” Han tells you from across the table. “Sometimes Minho will cut dance rehearsals early for us to go back and watch it.”

“Seriously?” you ask. “Wow, that really means a lot, you have no idea.”

“It’s easy to be a fan of yours,” Chan grabs your attention. “You’re one of the kindest people we’ve met in a while.”

Oh, you are practically kicking your feet around. 

“Fame is a whole other universe to tackle. I wanted to make sure I treat my fans and everyone around me the way I wanted to be treated before all this happened to me. It’s important not to lose yourself. But I know you guys all know that already. You’re masters at it.”

“Hyunjin still lets it get to his head.” Felix jokes. 

“What!”

The pre-show continues like this as the rest of the celebrities file in. Many stop by your chair and say hello to you.

With each one, you get up out of your seat, hug and kiss them hello, then sit back down only to be interrupted again. 

“You certainly are popular,” Chan comments after you say goodbye to a fellow actor. “That last guy crossed the room to come say hi to you.”

With a giggle, you joke, “Is someone jealous?”

He stiffens for a moment, his back going straight and he clenches his fists on the tabletop for a moment. “No.”

His answer is not firm at all. 

Before you’re able to analyze it, producers come out among the audience to tell everyone the cameras are about to begin rolling. 

“When is your award in the lineup?” You whisper over to Seungmin. 

“Right before yours, actually.”

“Maybe I’ll see you all backstage then.”

You both smile at each other and shift back in your chairs. 

Several cameramen come out into the audience with their large sets of equipment. One of them is very obviously hovering by you. 

You know he’ll signal you if you’re being shown. The teleprompters strategically placed along the venue also show what is being broadcasted. 

Opening music begins playing and the lights dim among the audience. The centerpieces on the tables give off an evening glow. 

A waiter comes over and places your drink on the table. You actually had forgotten you requested one before sitting down. 

You thank him and he takes his leave. 

“What’s that?” Chan whispers in your ear. 

“Espresso martini,” you answer. “Wanna try?”

Chan looks over at his manager, who is busy watching the host make his opening speech. He nods quickly and leans down, taking a long sip off the top. 

A tiny ‘mmm’ comes from the back of his throat and he looks at you while licking his lips a bit. 

“Oh that’s delicious.”

“And dangerous.”

You lift the glass and take a long sip from it and place it back down on the table. 

“I got my first major role fresh out of college. I’m still learning how to not rely on alcohol to have fun.”

Chan just laughs and both of you direct your attention to the host on stage. 

“-and if all else fails, we have our lovely knight in shining armor to protect us, tonight.”

The camera man turns and has the camera on your face. You smile brightly and blow a kiss into the camera. The entire audience lets out several positive reactions. 

When the camera cuts away, you let out a sigh of relief. “I knew they were gonna do that.”

You take another large swig of your drink. It’s almost empty already. Curse these fancy people and their tiny portions. 

Chan leans over and suddenly his hot breath is on your skin. Goosebumps rip down your body and you can’t suppress a shiver. 

“Careful,” he whispers lowly. “I don’t think you want to be stumbling onto the stage.”

“I think you underestimate my alcohol tolerance, Mr. Bang.”

You both make eye contact.

The audience applauds as the host leaves the stage and the first announcer comes on. Both of you clap and Chan leans away from you. Out of the corner of your eye, you see his tongue dart out to wet his bottom lip before he pulls it between his teeth.

His cologne lingers around your senses even after he’s gone. 

Dammit, he’s right. But, my god, you need another stiff drink.

---------------------------------------

“And here are the nominees…” The announcer says into the mic. The entire table is holding their breath. 

This was it, this was Stray Kids’ award. Your jaw clenches with anticipation as the names are read off one by one. Individually, you crack each of your knuckles anxiously.

All eight of the members are staring up at the screen, each of them have their own nervous ticks. 

You reach under the table to try and comfort Chan a bit, your hand landing on his knee. He jumps in place at the table at the contact.

Without looking at each other, he places his hand on top of your and squeezes a bit.

“It’s going to suck when I have to sit here by myself after you guys win.” you whisper to him.

“If we win.”

“You’re going to win.” You squeeze his knee again.

“And the winner is…” 

You suck in a breath, all of them stiffen up. Cameras are pointed at each of the nominees tables. 

“Stray Kids!”

Immediately, you spring out of your seat with a gleeful cheer. Clapping your hands together and smiling at each of them. 

Without a second thought, Chan wraps you into a grand hug, pure joy written across his face. Your face morphs into a shocked one, but you hug him back happily.

He’s so warm. His hug is so tight.

After a few heartbeats, he tears himself off of you with an unreadable expression. All eight of them walk up to the stage and grab the award from the presenter.

Sitting back down, you take a second to catch your breath. 

So badly, you want to focus on their acceptance speech, but all you can think about was the way Chan held you. It went straight to your heart, and thanks to the alcohol in your veins, it traveled a bit south as well. 

Nervously, your hand comes up and rubs at your chest by your collarbones, a small nervous tick of yours.

The table feels so empty without the eight of them there. Their manager is the only one left sitting there with you. He’s watching their speech intently.

Both of you stand and clap once more as they walk off the stage. All of them pushing each other gleefully and playing slap ass. It makes you giggle.

All of the lights around the room shift again and another announcer comes into the stage. The same camera man as before comes around the side of the table to stand closer to you.

The announcer goes through their speech about how important actresses are, how each of you stood out, how it was an honorable nomination. Your heart is in your throat, you can feel each thud against your ribcage so closely. 

No one was next to you to hold your knee. 

“And the nominees are…”

Various clips of the other nominees in their element flash behind their names.

Your name is third. Several different dramatic scenes play out within the five second window. They chose some of your best scenes for that little animation. The next few nominees flash after that.

“And the winner is…”

You suck in your breath.

“Y/N L/N! King and Pirates!”

The entire audience erupts in cheers. Practically everyone stands up on their feet.

You bury your face in your hands in disbelief. 

“Oh my god!” you practically yell as you stand up. 

An actor from the next table places his hand on your back to help you out of your chair. You smile gratefully at him and make your way up to the stage. 

During the entire walk, several different people offer you their congratulations, you thank each of them, shaking their hands. 

Climbing your way onto the stage, you make your way over to the announcer, kissing their cheeks as a thank you and turning to speak into the mic.

“Oh wow,” you laugh into the mic, looking down at the award and then back up at the audience. “I know everyone says this, but I really did not expect this! I mean, have you seen any of the other shows?”

A gentle laugh comes from the crowd. 

The rest of your acceptance speech is short, sweet, and to the point. The timer on one of the teleprompters definitely motivated you to speak quickly. 

As you walk away with your award, music plays behind you. A stage manager comes up to you and ushers you through the wings.

Several more congratulations come your way, you respond to each of them humbly.

You turn a corner and are met with a cheer even louder than the one from the auditorium full of people. 

All eight members of Stray Kids are clapping for you, jumping up and down in excitement. Your enthusiasm immediately matches theirs as you come up to them.

“I can’t believe it!” you say loudly, holding the award out to look at. “I think I’m dreaming!”

You turn and look up at Hyunjin, “Pinch me, I have to be asleep!”

He laughs at you and lightly grabs your arm. You yip dramatically and look back down at the trophy. “Nope, definitely awake!”

“If you guys would please find your seats, we need to clear this hallway.” a stagehand ushers your group away. He turns and looks down at you with a soft smile, “They wouldn’t leave until you came back.”

“Aww,” you coo to all of them. Your arm wraps around Jeongin’s, who happens to be the closest at the moment. “You guys are too sweet!” 

Your head rests on his arm and you hug it close as a thank you. He pats your hand and bends his arm to escort you back to your table.

A pair of deep brown eyes burn into the side of your head the more you grab onto Jeongin. Not that you noticed. 

Walking through the hallways, you see one back hall that has signs for the bathroom.

“Actually, I’m going to run to the ladies’ room before going back to the table. I’ll meet you guys back there. Do you mind taking this back to the table for me?”

You drop Jeongin’s arm and hold the trophy out to him. The maknae is hesitant, but takes your award anyway. You laugh at him and rub his arm before you head back to the bathroom.

“Am I allowed to be holding this?” he asks as you walk away.

The venue was a grand, old hotel, you follow so many twists and turns to get to the bathroom. Was there even one back here?

Did you take a wrong turn? There aren’t even workers back here. 

You definitely aren’t supposed to be back here. Turning back and finding another bathroom is probably the best option at this point. 

A gentle grasp on your wrist makes your heart jump and a gasp tear from your throat. Frightened, you turn around and raise your hand to hit whoever snuck up on you. 

“Y/N! It’s just me!” Chan says quickly, cowering behind his hand just in case you still swing. 

“Ugh, Chan! You scared the shit out of me!”

“Sorry, I called your name a few times, I guess you didn’t hear me.” You shake your head, he sucks his teeth. “That explains it. Staff told me there’s no bathroom down here, I wanted to grab you before you got too lost.”

Chan chuckles nervously, you laugh too. “That explains it. I guess those signs must’ve been extras that they printed for the venue. Who knows?”

It’s now that you notice he’s still holding your wrist tightly in his hand. His hand is so warm, so soft. 

He nervously licks his lips and his eyes look all around the hall, anywhere but at you. His throat bobs with a gulp. 

“I don’t ah— I don’t believe I gave you a proper congratulations. So, congratulations on the award. You deserve it.”

“Oh!” You giggle. “Thank you! And a hearty congratulations to you as well, I can’t think of anyone who’s worked harder than you guys.”

Taking another step closer to him, you turn your wrist around and take a hold of his hand.

“I also can’t think of any other celebrities I would want to celebrate with.” The corners of your lips pull into a grin, Chan’s twitch as well. “You guys are so sweet, cheering for me. Made the win that much better.”

Slowly, his ears begin to turn red and his jaw clenches a few times. His chocolate brown eyes flit all over your face and around the hall. His nerves on clear display. 

“Yeah, well, you deserve it, so.” Chan clears his throat and adjusts the tie around his neck. “I can’t take credit for it, it was Changbin’s idea to wait for you and all.” 

You reach up on your toes and press a long, soft kiss to his cheek. With his lips right by your ear, you’re able to hear him gasp under his breath and then stop breathing. 

Underneath your lips, you feel how much heat is radiating off his smooth skin. It’s like you kissed a frying pan. 

“Thank you, Channie,” you whisper against his skin. 

The hand around yours twitches and tightens. 

You press another kiss to his cheek before going to back away. 

Quicker than you can blink, Chan’s free hand comes around your body and holds you against him. His hand curls around you to press into the small of your back. 

Your head tucks under his chin, ear against the dip of his throat. His heart is beating just as fast as yours. 

“Not yet,” he whispers so quietly you almost didn’t hear it. “Please, not yet.”

Your heart thuds in your chest at his words. How could you not? The Bang Chan is asking you to stay closer to him for just a little while longer. The same man you’ve admired from a distance for years. 

The man who created such a deep parasocial relationship with you that it took a lot of self reflection to bring yourself out of it. And now, here you were, in his arms in real life, tucked away in the hallway of this hotel. 

Smelling his expensive cologne and aftershave, listening to his shallow breathing, the entire world seems to stop. If your past self could see this, she’d probably pass out. 

Hell, you might pass out now. 

You squeeze his hand once and he responds with a grip of his own. 

Slowly, you pull your head back to gaze up at him. He stares down at you with the most thoughtful expression. 

Eyes are windows to the soul; and right now, his soul is so flustered and fulfilled at the same time. 

“I can’t believe tonight is real,” you murmur. 

Several times, you catch Chan’s eyes flicking down to your lips. Each stolen glance adds another butterfly to your stomach. 

His hand on your back pulls you even closer. 

“You keep talking as if you’re not one of the biggest names in the world right now.” he teases and you chuckle softly. “If anyone should be pinching themself, it’s me.”

His breath is cool and minty. Yours is tinged with espresso. 

Your tongue comes out and licks your bottom lip before you pull it between your teeth. Chan watches, trying not to make it obvious. 

“Can I try something?” Your question is deathly quiet. If it wasn’t for the silence of the hallway, there’s no way he would have heard it otherwise. 

“Yes,” he replies immediately. It comes out as a huff; quick, short, and desperate. 

“Close your eyes, Chan.”

He listens right away, his eyes snapping shut. 

You hesitate for a split second, just taking in his ethereal beauty. Every curve of his gorgeous, blemish free face. It’s not fair.

Both of his hands twitch, his jaw clenches. 

You lean up slowly and press a featherlight kiss on his plush lips. 

His shoulders seem to sag inwards, a large, relieved exhale leaves his nose. 

Fireworks explode behind your eyes, tingles shoot down into your fingertips. 

You pull back after a second, his eyes open a bit and Chan stares down at you, his lips parting for a moment. 

He stares intently into your eyes, as if trying to read you or see something within them. 

Without breaking eye contact, he leans down and kisses you again. You melt into the kiss with half lidded eyes, they unfocus as you fall further into his kiss. 

Chan pulls back for a moment to turn his head and capture your lips once more, his bottom lip slotting between yours. 

Both of your eyes shut. 

Your hands move and you wrap your arms around his neck, pulling his head closer to yours as he kisses you like his life depends on it. 

Chan holds your waist with both hands, the heat from his hold going right through your dress. 

Each kiss is hot and heavier than the last. His grips at your dress grow needier and needier by the second, he can’t hold you close enough to his body.

Within moments, you’re both opening and closing your mouths, with open mouthed, wet, sloppy kisses. His eyebrows pull together.

Erotic pants fill the empty hallway.

You ever so gently bite down on his bottom lip and pull your head back. 

Chan sighs and his half lidded, hazy eyes look down into yours as his lip snaps back after you release it. 

He takes two long steps and walks you backwards until your back hits the wall. 

“Tell me to stop,” he murmurs against your lips before capturing them in another heated kiss. “You’ll have to tell me. I can’t do it myself. Not when I’ve wanted you for so long.”

Your fingers thread up through his hair on the back of his head and you pull him closer against you. 

Tangled tongues and gentle grunts mix together. 

“What if I don’t want you to stop?” you ask lowly in between kisses. 

Chan groans and presses his entire body into yours. 

You felt like you’re on fire with the way you’re so feverishly pulling him closer. 

One his hands moves up and down your waist. The puffiness of your skirt getting in the way of his hips grinding directly into yours. 

“So beautiful,” he mutters between kisses. “So gorgeous.” Kiss. “Wanted you for so long.”

It’s your turn to moan at his praise, you suck on his tongue and his eyes roll back in his skull. 

When you pull away from each other panting, you look around in the hallway. There’s a door right next to you both, where it leads, you’re not sure. 

Chan kisses your cheek and then makes his way down your neck with his lips. 

“Chan,” you moan out. 

“Yeah, baby?”

Fuck. That goes right to your head and makes your stomach flip. 

He presses another wet kiss to your exposed collarbone and your head tilts back, knocking against the wall. He’s making it impossible to try and get any words out.

The hand on your ribcage squeezes when you let out a breathy exhale. 

“Did you need something?” he mouths against your neck and bites down right after. 

Oh, that cocky motherfucker. 

“Fuck, Chan…!” You pull at his hair. 

He brings his head up with a dopey look on his face, eyes half lidded and hazy. 

“Hm?” he hums and leans in, pressing another kiss to your check. 

One of your hands comes down and runs over his chest. You grab a hold of his tie and twist it around your hand before yanking on it. Your lips are right next to his ear and you make sure to let out hot exhales.

Chan gasps and presses a hand on the wall next to your head to keep his balance. A shiver wracks his body.

“You’re starting something you can’t finish.” The low, gravel timbre of your voice shocks even you for a moment. It’s raspy and sexy. It has an effect it has on Chan immediately. His pupils dilate and he takes a sharp intake of air.

“Oh, princess,” Chan bites your earlobe before blowing against it lightly. “I’ve never started something I didn’t intend on finishing.”

God, his voice. It’s like running your fingers over velvet. You yank his tie to the side and drag him towards the room like he’s on a leash.

Chan lets out a surprised grunt, but follows you nonetheless. Just like your little puppy begging you for your attention.

The entire walk over to the door, his hands are on your body. Anywhere Chan can reach, he’s touching you. 

When you push open the door, you’re happily surprised to find an empty dressing room. All the lights are off– perfect.

Once you both are inside, the door shuts and you push Chan against the back of it. Your lips desperately smashing together.

He’s everywhere on your body. His hands don’t stay in the same place for more than two seconds before he’s groping somewhere else. 

Blindly, he reaches for the door handle and clicks the lock in place. 

Your fist is still tightly curled around his tie, you wind it around your hand a few more times while your tongues tango. Sinfully wet noises emanate from your locked lips. Your other hand runs down his chest to unbutton his blazer.

Chan pushes off the wall and shucks the blazer off his shoulders, dropping it onto the ground. 

Never once do his lips leave yours. He’s intoxicating, you can’t get enough and neither can he.

He backs you up again until your ass hits a counter.

In one smooth movement, Chan reaches down and grabs your waist and lifts you onto the countertop. Your legs part and he stands in between them.

“This fucking dress,” he growls against your lips and nips your bottom one lightly. Desperately, he begins grabbing at the fabric, bunching it up around your hips. Underneath, you’re still clothed in stockings, corsets, spandex shorts, and many more.

He doesn’t seem to care. With both hands now grabbing your nylon-clad thighs, he brings both of your legs to wrap around his waist.

As soon as both of your hips meet, moans leave both of your mouths and you swallow each other’s. He’s hard as a fucking rock against you. So many layers of clothing separate the two of you from one another, it’s endlessly frustrating.

You pull his tie even tighter and one of his hands comes down to grip the edge of the counter for balance. 

Your hips roll against his once and he has to tighten his grip so much his knuckles turn white. 

“Do it again,” he whines against your mouth.

Who are you to say no? 

Again, you roll your hips up into his. This time, his hard cock rubs right against your clothed clit. It’s just enough to send a ripple down your legs and into your toes and they curl in your Prada heels.

You don’t stop in between hip rolls this time, you do it again and again and again. Each one feels better than the next.

It’s like your head goes underwater, deep within the riptide of the oceans of pleasure. 

And by the noises that are coming out of Chan’s mouth, you know he feels the same way. 

His hips begin to meet your thrusts with his own. Both of you are grinding into each other like teenagers in your parents’ basement. 

But you both are so needy at this moment that you’ll take anything you can get to scratch that insatiable itch. 

With each thrust, his exhales get heavier and heavier, whimpers and whines come out in between them. 

Your head kicks back against the mirror behind you after one particularly delicious roll. There’s no way you’re even on planet Earth right now with how much he’s making your body thrum.

“Fuck, babygirl,” he moans out and kisses your bare shoulder. 

You pull on his tie absentmindedly while you cry out when he thrusts even harder. 

“Wanna hear those moans with you on my cock,” he hisses when your legs tighten around his waist. “If I’m making you feel this good without touching you, think of how loud you’ll scream when I can finally fuck you into my mattress.”

“Chan-!” you whimper, your eyes squint closed, mouth falling open.

How is he so fucking good at this? Those dancer hips are merciless. It sends just the right amount of pleasure through your body.

“You know that Vogue photoshoot you did last month?” he moans into your ear, his lips right next to it. 

Your Vogue photoshoot was a borderline boudoir shoot. Only a black sheet covered you in most of your shots.

All you’re able to do is whine out an “uh-huh”.

“Babygirl, I can’t even think about that shoot without my cock getting hard. God, fu–huck! Shit.”

He’s going to make you cum just by grinding on you. You can feel it coming closer and closer. 

One of his hands travels up your body to grab at the side of your neck, his thumb caressing your jawline while he licks and nips at the other side. 

“Want you to pose like that for me. I want you all to myself.” He sounds like he would eat you whole if he could. And fuck, you would let him.

He could tell you to get on your knees and bark right now and you would.

“Close, Chan…” you whimper.

Just hearing that he’s going to make you cum makes his eyes roll in his skull. Every single wet dream of his is coming true under his own two hands. He has Y/N L/N’s legs wrapped around his waist, his cock pressed against her clothed cunt, her skin in his mouth.

Is this what winning felt like?

“You gonna cum for me babygirl?” he hisses and bites your neck.

“Yes! Shit! Don’t stop, please!”

When you try to meet his thrusts, your hips stutter, they’re unable to keep up with how fast he begins moving.

“Need you to cum, babygirl, need it so bad. Need it like I need oxygen.” Chan’s hand moves and he pulls your lips together.

He’s all consuming.

Three more thrusts and your body seizes, your orgasm gripping you so tightly that you think you might black out. 

You break free from his kiss to throw your head back. It thuds against the mirror. Your legs tighten around him so much he can barely move.

Chan rolls his hips a few more times, letting you ride out your mind-blowing orgasm. Each one is slower and more sensual than the last.

After a few seconds, your legs loosen up a bit around him. Chan trails softer kisses down your neck, over both of your collarbones, then back up to your cheeks.

They’re gentle and sweet. So different from the way he was absolutely devouring you mere moments ago.

“Chan,” you pant out. “Let me help you.”

“Soon, baby. Not here.”

He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a gold card– a hotel roomkey. 

Chan leans forward and presses a long kiss to your swollen lips. While he’s attached to you, he slips the roomkey into the top of your dress where your breasts sat.

“The Mark, room 103. Fuck The Plaza, you have your own afterparty to attend to.”

[annisassintchaska]

Daddy's Always Here: Lewis Hamilton X Black!Reader

NOTE: Lele is pronounced Lee-lee

The night is very cold as the time was approaching Christmas, so everyone had to be covered up to keep warm. Lewis was able to be at home during the week to spend some time with Y/n and his daughter, Leah Hamilton; however he had to leave for the last few races of the season. The little Hamilton was very sad that her daddy was leaving again, but promised to still cheer for him while he was on the track.

It was a couple of minutes after 8pm when Lewis returned back to the apartment that was given to him for his stay while in Barcelona as he had some extra things to go over. He decided that since he was lonely from leaving Roscoe at home, he would call to speak with his family. Lewis retrieved the telephone from his pocket and clicked on his Y/n's number to start the facetime; however after a the call was answered he was surprised to see his daughter instead of his wife. "Hi daddy, how are you?!" Asked the fully-energized toddler. "Hi baby, daddy's doing great. How are you and where is mommy?" Lewis asked confused to why his wife was nowhere in sight. "Mommy went to the kitchen to clean up the dishes. Should I give her the phone?" The smart baby asked as her father nodded his head yes.

Little footsteps could be heard until a voice broke out "Leah, you can't be running on the tiles with socks. You'll fall and hurt yourself" Y/n softly spoke to her daughter as she lifts her onto the counter. "Sorry mommy, daddy is on the phone and he wanted to see you" the toddler explains as she showed her mommy the phone. "Hi babe, you look tired. Why are you out in the cold?" Y/n questioned her husband. "Yeah, I'm a bit tired. Just got back from the track and thought I'd check in to see how my beautiful family is doing" Lewis answered causing Y/n to blush. "Well Sir Lewis, if I must have you know, your family is doing quite fine just sad because we miss you being here with us" She replied making a smile appear on his face.

"Daddy, when are you coming home?" Leah asked sadly as she took the phone from her mother's hand. "Why are you asking pumpkin?" Lewis asked suspiciously as she had never asked that particular question before. "I just wanna see you. You go away very quickly after coming home and we don't have enough time for bedtime stories or cuddles anymore cause you are never at home. Daddy, do you love me?" The toddler asked on the verge of tears, shocking both parents as the baby had never mentioned feeling this way before. "Of course I love you Lele, you're my daughter. As you know I have to work to be able to take care you and mommy so I'm away a lot which is why when I'm at home, I try to spend as much time with you as possible. Please don't doubt my love for you my baby. I love you with all my life" Lewis explained as his heart was breaking at the words he heard.

"Tell you what, daddy doesn't have work tomorrow so how about you both stay on the phone until you fall asleep. He can read you a bedtime story and you both can talk about your day at school and your drawings yeah?" Y/n suggested making the toddler become excited. Throughout the time, Leah showed her daddy some pictures she drew and painted in class as they spoke about the meanings behind them, then they talked about her new teddy that grandpa Anthony gave her and what she named it. Eventually things winded down as Leah was put into her crib with the phone because Lewis wanted to speak with his baby before she fell asleep. "Leah, I want to let you know that I love you very much and I know it's hard for you to understand now that I'm away most of the time but I promise you that you and your mommy are always on my mind. I wish I could take you with me everywhere I go but that is impossible due to you having school. I want you to know that no matter where in the world I am from home, my heart is always with you. Daddy will always be here ok?" He asked as he daughter nodded her head in response. They moved onto the bedtime story where Lewis read until Leah fell asleep when Y/n came to get the phone.

"She really needed that talk." Y/n said as she walked towards her bedroom. "Yeah I know. I'll be coming home on a three hours flight tomorrow for the Christmas break. So we'll be spending a lot of ime together with her alright?" Lewis responded as Y/n became excited to have her husband back home. "Yeah, I'll make sure to keep the secret. I love you Lew" Y/n said as Lewis replied "I love you too Y/n/n" before the call ended. This specific night, Lewis went to sleep feeling jittery at the mere thought of reuniting with his family.

[plenilune]

what a weird year it's been! this time last year I remember being so high on not wanting to die for the first time in years that I was ecstatic to greet 2023 and find out what I could do in it -- I don't feel that way this year, buffetted about by circumstance and my stupid human body and brain, but I don't feel defeated. I feel like I made a good first pass at a piece of work and now I'm going to take a hack at another draft. I made some good ground. not all the ground I was hoping to make, but a lot I wasn't expecting. I feel good about my ability to keep building a life and a self I can be more and more joyful to occupy.

I tried a lot of new things and some of them didn't work but most of them did. I said yes to a lot of weird shit. I had so many experiences this year. I'm glad I spent a night dancing and smoking on the fire escape outside a masonic lodge and being absolutely drenched in rain. I'm glad Corey and I went on a gorgeous queer group ride with a bunch of other queer cyclists through the streets of our favourite parts of northern Kentucky and then bicycled back home together. I'm glad I had a not-quite-one-night stand and bused home as the sun rose golden and alive and lovely. I'm glad I re-learned the importance of dancing at clubs until I can barely move. I'm glad I saw Oldboy in the cinema and was so adrenalised that I jumped up and down on the sidewalk and screamed waiting for my bus home. I started painting back patches and sewing things onto my clothing and making jewellery and collaging and cropping all my tshirts and sweaters.

I started writing again .god, I started writing again.

and I broke my phone, my glasses, and my computer and struggled financially and took a nightmarish disaster trip to Philadelphia for my grandmother's funeral and I lost access to meds for reasons that were completely my own fault and thus sunk into a mire of depression and fatigue for several months that could have been completely avoided. I struggled to connect to people and struggled to feed myself and been a goddamn wreck. I didn't really accomplish most of the things I thought I was going to, that I started with eagerness and energy at the beginning of the year.

but hell. I built some shit. now I can keep building on top of it. I feel like a completely different person sometimes now, with different possibilities. I fucked up and lost and careened into walls of bad luck over and over this year but I feel better for and about it than I have in a long time. okay, that's new muscles. okay okay okay. new page, new draft, we can go again.

anyway. this year I want to push forward more deliberately on some of the stuff I found out I could do this year -- obviously I am continuing to work on my goddamn space heist book, but also specifically pursue block printing, drag/burlesque, bass, and making zines in 2024 instead of just experimenting with them. bicycle more, cook more, invest in people more, Not Go Off My Meds At Any Point, play more video games, watch more films. (I watched over sixty this year! after barely watching films for so long I didn't know what my own taste was any more, and feeling the shame and confusion of having once been a kid who wanted to go to film school but didn't know what movies they liked any more.)

anyway. here's to all of you who have kept me alive and interested in the world this year. my beloved partner is making arriabbiata and playing jazz in the next room. I have to work first thing tomorrow but tonight I'm going to finish the first season of Better Call Saul and poke at my novel and the day after tomorrow I'm going to have tea and listen to music and sew patches onto my jacket and best flannel. I'm going to keep finding new things to be alive for. I'm going to create a self I want to live inside. I'm excited to know what things are going to happen to me in 2024. I'm excited to learn about new ways to feel joy.

goodnight, 2023. you were a mess and I loved you more often than I didn't.

[grazieschillivera]

Longing curses 2/5

-His persuasions-

Chapter Summary: After the little incident at the dueling club Tom has to start over to win you back. Now that he knows how the little dance of love works, he decides to not only show you how similar you both are but also shares a new secret with you

Word count: ca. 2000

Warnings/tags: some fluff (I guess), manipulation, making out

Some days went by. Tom could feel how tense you were again in his presence and he started to think about how he should show you that you were wrong. One afternoon Tom's studying got softly interrupted when a gentle laughter echoed through the shelfs. His head turned around in curiosity. He had never heard such a sweet laugh and his heart arched in a unknown way once his eyes found you. You stood there with a friend who just made you giggle and you suppressed the rest of it to not interrupt the other students further while you gave your friend a warm smile - instead of him, he thought. He was supposed to make you laugh, you should be at his side by now. Maybe you were right. He had to give something to get something, love needed commitment. True commitment, and Tom needed to find a way to share this with you without breaking himself.

                                                ✧ ⊹ I ✧ ⊹

A week later you had curfew again. Occasionally you would see some of the other prefects when your routes almost crossed.

,,Coffee?'' a voice next to you asked, making you stop in your admiring of the painting over the library entrance. The shadow next to you was easy to recognize. Unsure you looked down at Toms bottle.

,,Its safe, see. Helps with the tiredness'' he said while he held the bottle in front of you after he had taken a swallow.

,,Thanks'' you said when you took it from him. Your gazes were still locked.

,,You can trust me. I have every book I want. But I want to go inside to show you something'' he said. You drank some of the coffee and even though it was welcomed, your lips still curled down due to the bitter taste. Or maybe because of the offering Tom gave you.

,,I'm not interest in you showing me whatever you have in mind'' you said handing over his drink.

,,You don't mean that. I fear you misunderstood me last week. Give me another chance'' Tom said and made a step to the library’s huge wooden door, but you blocked his way by standing up in front of him.

,,I'm very clear with my opinions. You're just as cunning and self-serving as your friends, you don't care about others and just want things your way'' you said.

,,If I am all those things, then why do you think I had invited you to the club? Like it or not but I'm not the person you want me to be. In fact, I think you are scared to look at me without your assumptions. Thinking if you don't keep those borders up, you will get lost between them'' Tom said, showing you that he didn't lose his confidence despite your little argument some time ago.

,,Don't think of me as so stupid. I might suck in dueling but I'm not beneath you Tom! I know what I want. In a different world I would be a win for you.'' you said and tried to make you a bit bigger to meet his eyes. His relaxed smile really frustrated you.

,,Of course you would be. Thats why I like you. Me and you could be something special. Is my motive still so self-serving now?'' he asked still standing before you but not in an intimidating way you noticed. More like a friend who tried to talk you out of something harmful.

,,Well yes. After all I'm not interested. And I still have your little secret about you letting your friends sneak out during curfew. I will tell Professor Dumbledore tomorrow if you don't let it be Tom'' you said but not as sternly as intended.

,,Using our shared secrets as blackmail – who is cunning now? Seems we aren't so different from one another after all'' said Tom but you did not join his amusement.

,,No we are not. I follow rules, I treat people equally.'' you said confidently, knowing Tom had nothing in his hands that could harm your reputation.

An unsettled cry reaches your ear and you stop.

,,Thats in my wing'' you said and walked back upstairs. Tom followed you.

                                               ✧ ⊹ II ✧ ⊹

,,Its curfew. What are you doing here?'' Tom asked before you could.

A girl sat on a bench and wiped her tears from her cheek. She muttered something about her ex boyfriend and how she couldn't get back into her dorm, because he and his new girlfriend were there. Tom showed less interest in her excuse. With big steps he approached her to bring her to her head teacher.

,,Tom wait'' you said and walked in his way.

,,Its against the rules. Easy as that Y/N'' said Tom. Even though he didn’t care about the girl he still found himself very thankful of this lucky coincidence.

,,My wing, my understanding of the rules Tom'' you said, trying to not make a fool of yourself considering what you just had stated about your loyalty to rules. The way you said his name added more fun at his persuasions. Up to now it sounded always like a warning call but it would soon fade into something more suitable for his expectations.

Eventually Tom gave in and promised to accept your wish.

,,Please don't'' you simply said when your eyes met Toms again when you walked back.

,,I'm not judging your actions. Why should I? But since you are so keen to keep your reputation, you gave me a new secret. And I would like to trade it for a little favor. Just as you did'' said Tom, enjoying this feeling about giving you a taste of your own medicine.

,,Back then in the Pub I explained to you how getting to know someone works. I never thought you would misinterpret it so wrongly'' you said already knowing that you would go inside the library.

Tom lazily defended his actions, he already was occupied with other things in his mind but he played along for you.

,, You're sure this is a good idea. I'm not used doing such things'' you said silently, when you sneaking closely behind Tom, even though he had politely held the gate of the forbidden area open.

,,You'll be fine just stay quiet''. Tom took hold of your hand and walked confidently along the corridor, as if it was his wing that you walked in.

Due to the moonlight the bookshelves shimmered whitely when you passed them. You could only hear your own footsteps and it felt like Tom and you were somewhere completely else.

                                                ✧ ⊹ III ✧ ⊹

,,Sit down. I will be right back'' Tom said softly like he knew you needed someone to calm you down a bit. After all breaking rules made you still feel uneasy. He pointed to a bench that stood between some bookshelves from where you could look at a huge tapestry that showed the founders of Hogwarts. The air was cool.

Tom came back with a huge old book. On it laid a smaller one, that he took beside him. He tested the waters and asked you somethings about the founders. You both started to talk about it freely enjoying each other’s knowledge.

,,I have a next secret I would like to share with you. You Hufflepuffs can be trusted right?'' Tom said, his lips almost formed a grin. He seemed to suppress a feeling. Was it confidence? Or was it out of tension?

,,Sure I wont tell. Promise'' you said with a low voice prepared to stay open minded but carful.

For a moment you both shared in intense look. It was as if Tom wanted to read you despite your promise to be trustworthy. It crossed your mind that your odd friend fought an urge within him. But you couldn't really tell what it exactly was.

At first he kept his usual practical attitude he had whenever he talked to someone. Only the last part started to sound strange. For one second you thought it wasn't Tom who talked to you but then you figured, that this person was the actual Tom, or at least another part of him you hadn't seen until now:

,,Since my researches I finally understand myself, what I am, what I am capable of. I read everything from him, one day I will know all his secrets'' Tom said.

After am moment of silence he started to talk about the relationship Salazar Slytherin and Helga Hufflepuff shared in their lifetime. Loudly he questioned how they could share such a good bond, that was so infamous in Salazars diary, then he looked at you. Although he didn't mention it, you could sense what he thought after his last words. It made your stomach twist. But was it out of fear or curiosity?

You said that you are not the heir of Helga with a chuckle and that you don't live for this amount of pathos in your life. But it was useless, Tom saw something great within you. You couldn't change his mind and I a strange way you realized it did something to you. Being praised and called for the things you did so dearly. So you decided to also open up for him because that was what this night was about. Tom had decided to be honest instead of cunning. He was one of the good ones, it was clear to see for you.

 A bit shy you brought a book out of your robes pocket and presented an article that shows your family, who has a little reputation considering healing potions and herbology. It was almost like an unspoken law since the accident in the club to keep your distance from Tom but something made you break it.

You shared your story- that the glory vanished because your parents and grandparents had different interests, and that was completely fine for you. No one should practice something that made him unhappy. Nevertheless, you like it to sometimes research about your family from those better times. You found an ancestor of your father fell in love with someone very smart and they both ended up starting the little glory of you family.

,,I understand you, I do the same sometimes. Having a look in the past can give some orientation for what can be possible. Its like looking in a twisted mirror.'' you said still a bit lost in your memories about your family. After your words there was a cozy silence in the room. Being here didn’t feel forbidden anymore. It felt comforting.

,,I like this thought.'', Tom admitted showing his approval. You looked back at him and gave him an honest smile.

Now you knew what Tom searched for in life, and he knew what you searched for in a partner. And suddenly he became not only the keeper of your secret but also the answer to it.

With your permission Tom read some phrases out of Salazars diary to you and you started to get lost in the way his voice sounded so softly and his eyes now and then flew away from the lines and lingered on you. The words that held such a dangerous ambiguity couldn't reach your mind anymore, it was directed to Tom and the feeling he started to give you. At some point his hand had reached out for yours, he softly pressed it before using his words again.

,,I respect your values. Actually, we are quite similar Y/N. The difference between us is that I'm willing to prefer some people over others. Thats passion, isn't it? When there is this one person who outshines the others-who is simply more important'' he said and led your hand carefully to his lips to savor the feeling of your skin on them in such a way that your cheeks turned hot.

While you had the feeling that you and Tom melted into each other, Tom had the impression to finally wrap you around his finger, now you fell in love for him as well. At this moment you could only see him. Those not so beneficial values of your house would just vanish over time if you devote yourself truly to him. He would take care of it, and of you.

The hold Tom had on your arm stayed while his lips caressed your skin of it, carefully testing how close you would let him be.

,,You can't treat everyone the same Y/N.'' said Tom. He suppressed his satisfaction with you, who finally started to think, that you and him were possible. That only your mind was in your way of happiness.

,,And you don't want to treat me just as everyone else. Whenever I read about Salazars past, I see us. Just give it a taste Y/N'' added Tom close to your face after he had shoved you softly closer against him.

Slow and deep beats of your heart pounded against your and Toms chest, he was so close to you, he could feel how you were. If he couldn't see your pleading gaze, he had thought you planed on running away. But you weren't. Your mind told your body to stay still, Tom was finally in your head. To reward you, he pressed his lips against yours and felt how you fought against your last insecurities, while moving your lips shyly against his.

Patience, was all Tom had to remind himself of. Not only towards you. He realized despite his lust for you, that he was also in some way shy about this new form of intimacy. Still he would keep the control of it for you.

,,Doesn't this feel right? You feel so good Y/N. How can you ever deny us something so good again?'' Tom asked between wet kisses, that grew hotter the more he got lost in the feeling of your sweet lips and tongue that tried to keep up with his pace. It only made it harder for you to answer Tom, who demanded it.

But your shy nods and 'yes's weren't enough for him. Within minutes Tom had pulled you on his lap. His hands caressed the soft skin right underneath your breasts while his lips were attached to your neck to get every little moan out of you, that you tried to hid. You were in a library after all. But now fully consumed by this new ecstasy you moaned every answer out of your mouth he wanted to hear from you.

You looked down at Tom's eyes. They were so dark and yet so clear, that you could see yourself in them. And while you eyed this new side of yours, you also observed how Tom seemed to experience the same with you. 

The moment felt so unusual intense that your hands searched for Toms as a comfort, that were still around your ribcage. Before some fitting words of luck could be formed from your lips, Tom pressed his lips against yours again. It felt all so good your mind kept running and your heart beat so fast that you felt like a star that could explode. So you just made him stop.

Back on your spot on the bench you tried to study his feelings. For a second some kind of hurt crossed his frowned faced. Was it love that he wanted or was this just a trap you were naive enough to have fallen into for a brief moment?

,,Have you done this before Tom? Because I have not'' you said, your voice faded a bit away- you were unsure whether to feel pride or guilt.

,,Does this matter? It's what people do when they want I each other. And I only want you if this is what you want to know'' Tom said his last words with a secure smile, his hands brought you to his mouth before he gave them a kiss.

You were back at the same position where you just had started to fall for him again. But now something has changed. Something told you that he was meant to be yours and you were meant to understand him, to love him- because he had allowed you to do so. And Tom belonged to those people that rarely allowed such things- so this means he loved you truthfully, right?

,,We have seen each other’s true self now and we seemed to enjoy it'', said Tom now silently hoping to at least earn a nod from you. ,,Don't back away Y/N. Give it at least a try''. His hand that had held yours on the entire way back wouldn’t let go of you. Carefully he kept his grip around it.

So you nodded. Later Tom brought you to your common room offering you an invitation to a dorm party to give him and his friends a chance to show you, that you and your feelings would be safe with him.

[kaitlynpcallmebeepme]

Paint the Night Sky

Paint the Night Sky

Bang Chan x member!reader (more like the love he gives all his members)

Idea: Based off of this: https://youtube.com/shorts/zQg00zBAK30?feature=share 

Member!reader and maybe felix takes bang chan shopping and gets him some colorful clothes and stay asks who designed it and he's cute about saying it was her 

Requested: Nope. 

Author’s Note:  I know no one asked for anything Stray Kids related, but I wanted to do something short for Bang Chan’s birthday!  (me face palming and picking this up a year later the day after his birthday, but on my birthday) I am working on some other ideas, including a pt 2 to Late Night Talking, a couple Spencer Reids, and Bucky Barnes one but I am trying to make those longer and more like an episode, so they’re taking a bit longer to write.  Also, if anyone is a STAY and wants to talk Stray Kids, message me because I would like some STAY friends pls.  Last thing, I couldn’t tell you what their dorm looks like now, so just imagine that they still all live together. I also couldn’t find Chan in a pink hoodie, but I feel like the pink dolfin one would be a hoodie he’d like.  The title also sucks. lol.

Requests are still open.  Feedback is always appreciated.  Also, tell me if you want to be part of a Tag List and I’ll tag you when I upload something new. If you want to only be tagged when I upload something for a certain character or shows, let me know as well.  

Warning: None, just general fluff.

Word Count: 570

You walked into the dorm with Lee Know after a bit of personal dance practice.  It’s nice to practice with everyone, but it’s also nice to do some one-on-one practice to really help with your improvement.  And who better than Lee Know to guide you.

“Do you want to help me make some food?”  Lee Know asks you as he heads toward the kitchen.

“Yeah.  I’ll put on something for us to listen to in the background.”  You pull out your phone and see that the recent episode of two kids in a room came out, so you put that on as the background noise.  

You start by cutting the cabbage to put in the tteokbokki.  While Lee Know searched the freezer for something to fry.  You both continue to make food for the boys as the episode plays in the background.  There’s one particular bit of audio that catches your attention though.  

Chan: "I need someone to go together. I can't shop at all."

Felix: “You Always Buy Black Clothes. You look like a Reaper.”

This got you thinking and you had to ask Lee Know to be sure.  “Lee Know-hung?”

“Hmm”

“Does Channie-hung wear anything colorful?”

It took a second of silence for Lee Know to come up with an answer.  

“I don’t keep track of what he wears.”  That was the most Lee Know answer he could come up with.  “But if he does, then usually the stylist put him in it.”

“Yeah, he wears a lot of black.” That got you thinking and your mind set on what to do tomorrow.

You two continued preparing food as the rest of the boys came in from doing their various activities throughout the day.  When you saw Chan come into the kitchen, you enact your plan. 

“Channie-hung, you doing anything tomorrow?” 

“I was going to be in the studio then do Channie’s room, but I got nothing planned for the morning.”

“Good we’re going shopping.”  

“Ok.”  No an argument or anything, but Channie would honestly do anything for us.  

“Be ready to leave at 8.”

*Time skip to next morning*

You and Channie head down to the shopping district in Seoul.  Could you have done this online? Yes. But it’s like Christmas shopping.  It’s better when you get out there and get the full experience.  

You had to pull Chan away from anything black and white because he has a million of those already.  You had to do that more times than you can count.  You ended up going with a baby pink hoodie and baby blue shirts just to ease him into color more.  

“You sure you like…” Before you could even finish, you were captured in one of Chan’s hugs.  One of the ones that is fruitless to attempt to escape.  

“It’s cute! I love it Y/N.” 

Chan wore that hoodie all the way back to the dorms.  You parted ways when Chan went to the studios and you went up to the dorms.  A few minutes later, you see the notification of Chan doing Chan’s Room for Stay.  

Transcript from the live.

“Hi Stay. Hi. Hellooooooooooo.  Welcome to Channie’s Room.”  

“Chan you look so lovely. No, Stays look more lovely.  Chan you look so cute.  Yeah, um… Y/N picked the sweater because I’m told I need more colorful clothes *stands up so Stay can see his sweater* it has dolphins on it. I like it.”   

[txtmetonight]

ETA (estimated time of arrival)

call summary⋆ ★ "what's your ETA?" or when your lovely friends have caught your stupid boyfriend doing something he wasn't supposed to do.

pairing *. * choi beomgyu x fem!reader (lovers to exes)

genre⋆ ★ angst, dark themes

warnings *. * cheating, cursing, some dark themes (at the end), a car crash, slight usage of blood, violence, bad grammar

featuring ⋆ ★ new jeans, lee heeseung, chaewon (the last two are like only mentioned once)

call duration *. * 2.9k

a/n⋆ ★ obviously inspired by ETA. I didn't add too much to the warnings because I didn't really want to spoil too much but just know that there will be dark stuff...so just watch out lol. also if it sucks I wrote this in a day sooooo

taglist *. * @kflixnet

I accidentally choked on cherry pit while writing this and my first thought was thinking that I should clear my search history before dying

“(Y/n) look! Is that your boyfriend?”  

Eyebrows furrowing, you glance at your phone in confusion. Picking up a call from Hanni could mean anything, but this was something that you weren’t expecting. “Huh, what...where even are you guys?” You mutter, bringing the device to eye level and you notice the panicked look of your friends. “I cannot believe this” Danielle says, looking over to the side where the phone couldn’t capture.  

“Oh my god!” You stare intently at the screen as Hanni flips the camera over to film what looks like a young couple dancing. She zooms in and that’s when it hits you–that young couple was your boyfriend with another girl, whispering something softly in her ear, nudging his nose into her neck causing her to giggle and blush.  

“Hurry up and get here, we just sent you the location–oh shoot we have to perform, call you back in a bit!” The call cuts with Hyein getting her last words in. Leaning back in the driver's seat, you ruffle your hair with distress and betrayal, biting your lips hard enough to make them bleed. Your friends were right this whole time, and you didn’t have the heart to believe them. 

“Gyu will you be busy tomorrow?” You ask, laying on his lap, taking in the sweet breeze and warmth of your boyfriend who just chuckles at you, pinching your cheek with his fingers. “I am!” He pouts, “I have a family reunion to go to...why?” You shake your head at him, before turning over, laying right on your stomach as you stare at him with a lovesick gaze. “Just wanted to know.”  

That fucking asshole was lying straight up to your face. 

Pushing the gear stick forward, you sigh with anger, nails gripping onto the steering wheel, nearly breaking them from a harsh brake at a very reckless driver. You had a gut feeling that Beomgyu was doing something shady for the past six months or– that’s at least when the feeling started to become more apparent after your friends started complaining even more than usual about how nasty of a boyfriend you were dating (They’ve always opposed your relationship since the start). From always coming up with so many different excuses that it was starting to be deemed stupid, to hiding his phone when you had a chance to peek at it, he wasn’t very trustworthy. 

It just took so long to realize it when all of the signs were laid right in front of you, and it didn’t help that your best friends practically read out each and every syllable for you. 

“(Y/n) you’re dating Beomgyu right?” Minji randomly brings up while painting your nails, halting to look at your rose-tinted cheeks. “You’re dating Beomgyu, the fucking player!?” Danielle winces at the use of language, softly slapping Haerin on the arm. “Gosh, language! Anyways Haerin’s right...wasn’t he just dating Chaewon last week?” You hum at their words, silently admiring Minji’s pretty work on your nails. “Yes, but he told me that he’s liked me since sixth grade, and he was just super shy to ask me out!” The other five girls exchange worried glances, gulping at your infatuated state. “Don’t waste your time on him, he seems real bad! If you want my opinion you should end it with him.” Hyein simply vocalizes. Grumbling at her words, you start to feel disheartened at her words. But you really really wanted to give him a chance. “I–I’ll see. If he’s bad then I’ll break up with him, honest!” You place your hand on your heart giving a pledge to the rest of the girls, making them giggle. “Mhm alright.” 

Biting your tongue, you’re now sure you’ve made the grave mistake of not listening to them from their first thoughts about Beomgyu and now you’re paying the unfortunate price for it. And God it didn’t help that you had the biggest and fattest crush on the boy since seventh grade when he shared his colored pencils with you. You knew it was too good to be true when he mentioned that he liked you a grade before you ever did.  

The ringtone from your phone forces you to step on the brake pedal, abruptly stopping the vehicle in the middle of a parking lot that you were in because of a wrong turn. Beomgyu’s favorite song was playing on repeat, and you almost forgot that you had changed the ringtone the day you guys shared playlists for each other. On other days you would reminisce about the honeyed memory with a huge smile on your face but this time you start to get more furious, pressing the accept button immediately so you wouldn’t hear more of that foolish song. 

Background music was playing heavily from your phone as the screen shakes around, quickly flipping the camera around to face Beomgyu and that mysterious girl, and with a gasp you soon realize that the girl was one of his exes; Soo-Ah. They move in a little closer and her hand is grazing his bicep while his fingers thread through her hair, tucking it out of the way.  

“I saw it before, but you weren’t there” Danielle whispers, and it looks like she was holding the device this time because she then ushers the other to step closer with her. You stare incredulously at the act of infidelity between your boyfriend and his past ex as she tugs slightly on the purple cardigan that you bought for him, before she places a small peck on the corner of his lips, making him smile widely.  

From instinct, you try to look for the promise ring that he was supposed to be wearing but you turn pale once you realize that you can’t find it anywhere on any of his fingers. Twisting your body over, you open the glove apartment to find his faux diamond ring. He must’ve shoved it in there when you were dropping him off at your house. 

He gave you the pair of rings for your six-month anniversary, promising that he would stay by your side forever. 

“I’ve told you; he’s flirted with so many girls” Hyein comments. “So, dazzling” Hanni mocks, clicking her tongue at the cheesy touches of love they were both leaving on each other. “Honestly between us, he’s been totally lying this whole time.”  

“Why couldn’t you come to my birthday?” You smile weakly at the girl before letting out a strained cough. “Sorry, I was sick.” Biting her lip, Hyein looks at the other girls who looked like they felt pity for you. “You know… we saw your ‘boyfriend’ at the park. He was with a random girl!” Your heart drops but you brush it off. “Beomgyu was probably with his cousin. He said that they were coming by and it just so happens to be that she’s a girl and about our age, don’t sweat it.” You don’t notice the conflicted looks on the girls. 

“Hyejin got in so much trouble today.” It was a nice summer day today and you were having a picnic date with Beomgyu, a basket of sandwiches and snacks littering the heart-patterned blanket you brought. “Oh, okay?” Confused by his random outburst, you look at him through your lashes, arranging the meat on his lunch. “She–I have to give her my notes for class today” He breathes, his attention finally off his phone. “Wait, like right now?” Beomgyu sheepishly grins, taking the sandwich out of your hand, not even mumbling thanks to you. “Yeah. She’s going to fail the class if she doesn’t get them right now and you know how hellbent my parents and her parents are on me making sure she passes the class, right?” You ogle at him getting up, muttering for him to stay for a while. “Sorry babe, I’ll see you later alright?” And with that, he scurries away.  

You were walking to school with Haerin and Danielle, talking about the gossip that was circling around the school, and you don’t expect the topic to shift towards your boyfriend, but it does. “(Y/n), you know the day that Jiwon broke up with his girlfriend.” Danielle gasps, shaking your hand in hers while you nod a gentle ‘yes’ to her. “I caught your boyfriend, hugging her, Haerin back me up!” The cat-eyed girl jumps from her spot nodding frantically, hoping that you’ll finally open your eyes and see the truth. But instead, you just chuckle gingerly at the two, finding them entertaining. “They’re both very close friends, of course, he’ll comfort her. She just broke up her two-year-long relationship with her boyfriend. That doesn’t mean he’s doing anything wrong. If anything, I’m happy that he’s being kind!” Haerin’s jaw practically falls to the floor, “Oh my god, he’s got you wrapped around his fucking finger.” 

Snapping yourself from your daze, you catch the girls going even closer to the ‘couple’ and you find yourself on the edge of your seat, biting your nails in anticipation. “You’re not driving, are you? Because we don’t want you to get in a crash.” You whimper a small no to Danielle’s words. “Oh my god, what is he saying to her that has her giggling like that?”  

“It’s kind of gross–wait go in a little closer so us and (Y/n) can hear their words!” Minji heaves and you hear the phone tumble around a bit only for the screen to show the wooden tree bark before it moves, exposing the tiniest bit of the camera. “Stop shoving–oh God what an asshole!” Haerin gapes and you start to tear up a bit.  

The words he was saying to Soo-Ah were the exact ones he was whispering to you last night, with what you thought was so much fucking love and endearment, but you guess not. 

“We can go wherever you like” Soo-Ah nods at his words, pushing herself up against his chest. “Baby, say the words and I’m down” “Is that so?” The girl in his arm sighs, wrapping his arm around her waist and you notice the slight dig of his fingers in her skin. The same gesture that he did to you whenever he felt clingy and gentle. “Yeah,” He says, taking her cheeks into a pucker, bringing her up to her tiptoes, her fingers toying and clawing at his lilac clothing. “I just need you on my side” He finishes, taking her lips into his, enveloping her body into a hug, to kiss her tighter, making out with her right on the spot. 

“That cheating bastard!” You cry, slamming your fist into your steering wheel, eliciting a loud honk that caught the attention of some stray onlookers, though you didn’t really care. You loved him so much. So so much to the point you would do anything for him. And all he did was take your beating heart that was filled with so much adoration so he could rip it into tiny shreds.  

“(Y/n) …" Minji tenderly calls, obviously in shock that he would go so far as to eat her face, especially at a public party. “I’m fine! I’m fine! I’m totally fucking fine!” You start the car once more, fueled with even more anger and rage. “I’m almost there, just five minutes.” You hear Hyein curse the boy out and from how idiotic you were feeling right now, you have the urge to laugh. “Yeah, come quick, we’ll stop them from–oh shit!” Looking down at the phone, you’re met with the brown grooving again. “Are you guys, okay, what’s wrong?”  

“That stupid snitch Lee Heeseung must’ve told on us, we got caught!” You recognize the name ‘Lee Heeseung’. He was one of Beomgyu’s best friends and was part of that player group they had going on. “Was he even near us?” Hyein groans. “Cowards! They ran away...I think they left the party (Y/n). We’re so stupid, oh we’re so sorry!” You twinkle at their words, laughing silently at them. “It’s alright, I’ll be there soon, they shouldn’t have too gone far.” 

 The phone lifts and you see the bright blue sky again before the screen turns around to face your best friends, who look as angry as you. “We’ll look around for them and if we catch them, we’ll call you.” Hanni declares, saluting to you to lighten up the mood just a little bit. “Of course.” Driving with one hand, you carefully grasp your phone, finger hovering over the end button. “And if you see him, call us, bye!” Danielle cuts the call before you, having you drop the phone into the passenger seat. 

Gosh he was stupid, wasn’t he? 

“Hearing you ramble about that boy is making me spin. My head hurts when you can’t let him go, trust me you deserve better than that!” You were at a party at Hanni’s house and with all the girls there so you could touch up your makeup in Hanni’s room, you got ready for another round of grumbling about your boyfriend. “Don’t exaggerate that much, you know I’m the longest he’s ever been with!” You excitedly squeal, patting blush on your face. “I’ll give you a hand if you want! He’s just playing with your heart. Boys like him are always lying!” Rolling your eyes at Minji’s words, her words don’t give you an impact from the number of times you’ve heard them. “I promise I’m fine. thank you, guys, though! I’m sure I couldn’t ask for better friends anywhere.” Pulling them into a hug, you hope to distract their minds. You’d rather not talk about it anymore; it was starting to get tiresome. 

It was midnight.

Driving your car around the place, you find out that Beomgyu and his side chick haven’t gone anywhere by car, by asking your younger sister and the girl’s neighbor if their cars were there or not. Spoiler alert, their cars were still there, and double checking with Minji, you also know that his friends and her friends’ cars were still at the party and haven’t left since they were caught. You were ninety percent sure that Beomgyu was still here, crawling around to make sure that your friends left so he could resume his time at the party. Probably smooching up the girl. 

That rat. 

Starting to get more desperate you speed up your vehicle, silently praying that you would run into Beomgyu and Soo-Ah. Head floating above the clouds, you don’t notice a young couple, running into the street, crashing into your car, and shattering the windshield. 

Coughing at the debris, it takes you a second to register the two people on the hood of your car, one pinning the other one down. “Hey assholes, watch where you’r–Beomgyu!” You scream and the boy who looks bewildered freezes at your voice, quickly shooting his head down at the girl who seemed immobile against the hood. “I–(Y/n)–no baby, what are you doing here?” He shrinks from your furious eyes, dilated pupils trained on you as you reach over to the passenger compartment, the ring on your finger burning into your skin.  

Taking a small drive to the edge of the cliff to cool off wasn’t your ideal spot, but it helped. With the sun glowing in the background, you breathe in the fresh air of the morning breeze. Your car was ruined but you didn’t feel any pity for the old thing, instead sitting on top of the trunk where you could admire the swaying trees. Your ringtone startles you yet again, but you’re expecting the call this time. Hanni’s name pops up on your screen as you accept the call with a newfound sense of freshness and satisfaction.  

“Hey (Y/n)! Did you find Beomgyu at all? You didn’t call us last night.” Giggling at her eagerness, you play with an object in your hand, swinging it back and forward like a rocking ship. “I did! And you know we officially broke up! But he was like really fucked over, crying and begging for me to take him back. It was kind of funny.” You could almost see the pout on her face,

 “I wish I could’ve seen that!” You yawn into your hand, “I really wish too.” Hanni goes silent for a second before speaking up. “Let’s have a sleepover at my house tonight! We could help you get over him if you want.” Nodding to the phone, you place the device between the crook of your shoulder and your head, trying to lean down to inspect whatever was brushing your exposed ankle–seeing something purple. “That would be helpful, thank you. Anyways I’ll call you back later, bye!”  

You cut the call after her goodbye and put the phone down so you could jump down from the trunk, letting out a little grunt when you land on your feet. Moving back slowly you realize that you made a mistake. You accidentally let a purple cardigan slip through the crack of the trunk opening...not that it mattered though. Dropping the hammer that you were just swinging seconds ago, you watch with bittersweet memories as the red stains the sand, just as the dripping color, slowly slides down your ugly green car, clashing the hues together.  

Who knew that keeping a tool like that in a compartment in your car would become handy someday? Definitely not you, who knew from that damned party at your best friend’s house that he was being unfaithful to your loving heart.  

If only Beomgyu was aware of his surroundings, ho-hum.

[purple-thrill]

Can you do a Malleus ans S/O gn!reader where they go on a ice cream date and watch some movies please? I would like it super fluffy and sweet please.

Heyyyy

Sorry it's been almost a year but yes. Yes I can

Tw:none

Word count: 1048

Note: I did rush it at the end so sorry if that's not what you wanted!

The Sweet and Sour Impact of the Ice Cream Date

A Malleus x gender neutral! Reader

It was the middle of the night when you decided you needed to crack down on studying and the fact you couldn't sleep. Making sure Grim was sleeping from his day of shenanigans, and grabbing some school books, you go outside the fresh air hitting your nose.

You decide sitting down at the roots of a barren tree was a good decision to start studying there. So you cracked open the hand me down book and started to read it, making sure to make notes for tomorrow.

At some point firefly's started to appear near you, you looked up at the flying insects in time to hear a voice "up late again child of man?" Turning your head towards the voice you see Malleus, l.

His lips upturned at the sight of your figure as he approached you. Setting the now forgotten book down, you got up to greet your boyfriend. "Hello, Hornton, walking again?" You question giving Malleus a wave.

"Hm? Yes, it's a wonderful night for a walk." He said, smiling still. "I have something I wish to ask you." Malleus said, having a new glint in his vivid green eyes. "What is it?" You asked tilting your head a bit at the Fae in front of you.

"I was wondering if you'll accompany me tomorrow to town." Malleus said his smile weavering the slightest but as he asked. Your cheeks flushed heating up, "you're asking me on a date?" You asked, feeling your heart beat faster. 

"Yes, there is a new establishment I wish to visit with you, my child of man." Malleus voiced, having the same reaction as you. You put your hands into his and smiled like a lovesick fool you both were, "Yes, I'd love to go with you tomorrow Malleus." You say as Malleus nodded his head. You let go of his hands and backed up, "I shall see you tomorrow morning then." He affirmed as he waved at you walking away still having a flushed face.

You smiled softly at his retreating form, as you looked at the phone Crowley gave you, you decided to go inside your dorm at this ungodly hour.

You were the first to wake up other than the ghosts that inhabit your dorm. Carefully untangling yourself from Grim as he snored away, you got out of your bed. As you start your usual morning routine and getting ready for your date with Malleus. You'd also managed to get the ghosts to look after Grim for the day. 

There was a knock at the door, you open it and see Malleus. 

"Hello, I see you are getting ready, do you need me to wait a moment?" He spoke seeing your attire. You waved him off, "No, I am ready" you say and hook your arm around his, leaning a bit on him.

In the background you can hear Grim's sound of betrayal.

"Ah good, I got permission from Crowley to go with you today so there shouldn't be any trouble today." He says as he starts walking with you.

It isn't long of a walk before the two of you get to the establishment, you realize you hadn't asked him what kind of establishment it was but as Malleus came to a stop you saw an ice cream shop.

The ice cream shop exudes a cozy and inviting atmosphere. The exterior of the shop is painted in pastel colors, with hanging baskets of flowers, and a sign that reads "Scoops Ahoy!" in playful, cursive lettering. 

"Ice cream?" You say looking at the shop and at Malleus. "Yes, was this a bad place to take you?" Malleus asked, you shook your head at the Fae, "no! I just didn't expect this, not that it's a bad thing. Just sweet." You say as you look back at the ice cream shop. It had been a while since you had a treat like this.

"Then let's go." He said with a smile as he took your hand in his walking up to the ice cream shop.

As soon as you two enter, they are greeted by the sight of a glass display case filled with a colorful array of ice cream flavors, from classic vanilla and chocolate to more adventurous options like lavender honey and matcha green tea. The air is filled with the sweet smell of freshly-made waffle cones, and the sound of old-timey music playing softly in the background.

The walls of the shop are adorned with cheerful artwork and vintage ice cream advertisements, adding to the whimsical ambiance. Customers can choose to sit at one of the small tables and chairs, or relax in the cozy seating nook with plush pillows and blankets.

You two ordered your treats and sat down once you had them. The staff is friendly and enthusiastic, always willing to offer samples and assist customers in creating the perfect ice cream sundae although they are wary of Malleus. And with a variety of toppings, from sprinkles and hot fudge to fresh fruit and whipped cream, the possibilities are endless.

You two decide to share an ice cream sundae the way you like it. 

You laugh with Malleus as you two finish up at the table. You pick up your and his trash and throw it away in a nearby trash can. 

"I had a really nice time with you, Malleus." You chirped happily as you two left the ice cream shop. "I did as well." Malleus said before grabbing your waist and teleporting to your dorm's front door. "Oh!" You exclaim looking around. "I am sorry, you looked tired." He said looking at you.

"No, I am. I stayed up too late last night.. Anyways, thank you for taking me out on a date." You said as you opened the door. "Oh wait child of man" Malleus said, getting closer to you. You turn around to be met with your boyfriend's face. "I love you." He said before he kissed you.

[emmebearpaw]

natlan liveblog thread I guess. because I just walked there today. Yes I am late. No I haven't been spoiled somehow. I didn't even block the tags.

Like the fight music while I'm fighting the rift hounds why is the big saurian speaking to me telepathically. Oh i'm a dinosaur now

anyways please meet new child, Nugget. Baby has every disease <3. Baby is small and a little lump of gold but is also a dinosaur chicken nugget.

Pyroculi look weird. They aren't as tall as the others

yoooo the children of echoes / general area music is bopping Edit: definitely just one of the area themes. it's cycled. I'll find the one I like a whole lot later but this new one that was in a trailer is good too oh that feels plot relevant. Thank you random woman.

Thank you children of the Echoes for being the cliffside city i've always wanted to experience actually being lived in btw.

i love the painted cliffs

woaghhh so big! And has egg (pyroculus).

We sure have feasted in the 10 minutes since I got him

You know I think we could just. Use the word Xiuhcoatl. We could have flamelord as the alt text. That's ok. We can start with the word from the region.

I have to take him to the volcano! Later! After I plot!

Got sidetracked from my mission of get to all the statues so i can do the quest faster, big cave!

They lied to me. I was supposed to have MORE STAMINA

Weird trees spotted! Detour time!

Detour over, warp to the adventurer's guild acquired. Speedrun south Go

oh my god i just drowned a saurian by slipping into the lake and got an achievement for it

oh shit really tall trees

OH SHIT THE OCEAN? wait why am i surprised. I thought the ocean was going to be north towards fontaine not south. we have a boat route to liyue not through chenyu from Natlan!

The koholosaurs are the best ones. Speedy! the yumkasauri should be this fast! Ok! that's enough for day 1 of natlan. I ran my ass across the continent. Tomorrow we start on the plot!

[rereadanon]

🍂WEEKLY TAG WEDNESDAY🍂

Oops, I already messed this up! Here is me being chaotically late to our shiny new tag game, thanks to @deedala! And thanks to pals @mickeysgaymom @crossmydna @transmickey @metalheadmickey @gallawitchxx and @heymrspatel for the tags, it feels like a greatly needed hug!

---

Name: Anna

Age: 38 😱

Favorite color: Black or dark purple

What emoji best describes your current mood? 🥴 but if I think about it hard it’s also 😖😡😵‍💫👀🤡

What season is it where you are right now? Finally fall, finally less sweating

Were you up before or after the sun this morning? Both, thanks kid!

Are you currently in possession of a pumpkin? Yes, five small ones. Tomorrow is the big haul day!

Do you prefer to carve or paint your jack-o-lanterns? MUST have a carved pumpkin for Halloween!

Do you have a favorite pumpkin-spice flavored treat? Probably the Starbucks cold brew with pumpkin cold foam thingy. I get it without the vanilla, I don’t like sweet coffee unless it’s ice cream. The cold foam adds the perfect amount of sweetness!

What’s your favorite season and what’s your favorite pie that you associate with it? It’s a tie between summer and fall- summer is my mom’s family’s lemon ice box pie and fall is again my mom’s family’s mini lemon tarts ( the recipe calls for butter “the size of an egg”). 🥧🥧

We’re having a pot-luck, what are you going to bring? Pre- made margarita mix, both alcoholic and non, from my favorite margarita place. Extra chips for @gallawitchxx’s cowboy caviar. Fanfic related stickers to share with my pocket friends!!

It’s chilly outside and you need a hot drink in your hands, what are you drinking? Just hot coffee with some whole milk splashed in.

Will you be wearing a costume for Halloween? Is it ready? We are doing a family theme this year and as plus size person, my only choices that were quick and easy were Sexy Princess Peach or Toad, so Toad it is!

Finally, what’s something you’ve made or done recently that you’re proud of? Passed another college course and started the next. I’m doing school much slower than I imagined I would or like to, but hey, I’m doing it!

I’m not going to tag anyone, because I think everyone has been tagged and I am a day late. But imagine me hugging you!

[patrickztump]

RE: SRAR - I 100% agree with you, that it is a very red album to me too!

The Pheonix. Light 'Em Up. Death Valley. Young Volcanoes. So many of the song titles directly use imagery of fire, or miserable, all-consuming heat. I don't think it's a coincidence that the first two songs I mentioned are the two we heard first, and they both invoke the idea of burning everything down, in order to build something new. Even the poem you hear at the beginning of the "Miss Missing You" video ends with something like the words "Burn 'em all", iirc. And it's perfectly fitting, for where the band were then; They've passed through fire, and they're now reforged from the flames with new purpose.

And there's also, of course, plenty of red imagery throughout the Youngblood Chronicles, too. The aforementioned fire. The snakes with their red bands that appear a few times. The red pickup truck. The apples. And of course the blood. So much blood!

"Don't trust a band that wouldn't bleed for you" after all, right?

yes to all of this 😩 that's the thing i love about save rock and roll, it's the way songs are intertwined, often tightly, and there's a very consistent theme throughout every facet of it's creation. those themes are blatant with other records as well, but this one is very in your face about it – to me at least.

even songs that don't mention fire or heat in their titles still touch on it in their lyrics. "your hot whiskey eyes have fanned the flames / maybe i'll burn a little brighter tonight / let the fire breathe me back to life," "if heaven's grief brings hell's rain," and of course "rat a tat" is absolutely littered with fire references. i suppose you could even count the smoking of cigarettes in "where did the party go" as an indirect fire reference, as a flame is needed to light them and they glow orange from their heat. eight of eleven tracks involving flames of some sort is certainly painting the album as red.

and yes, the quote at the beginning of "miss missing you" – that was later added to copies of the record – drills the point home that the album has a specific theme. quoting it because it's so post-apocalyptic to me and i love the image it conveys:

they just sat back laughing at the wounded city, each breath sucking in ashes and fumes. oh it bled all right; drier than moore county. all expatriate fumes hurrying to find new nations of blinding dust. but the two of them. they just squinted at that pipe-cleaner skyline, and it burned hotter in their oil slick pupils. one elbowed the other and said "i've seen better." knowing that they were paid to remember the past - he blew out a hot breath and said "burn it all."

it's just so good?? and it makes so much sense being paired with "miss missing you" but also as an addition to the album. i don't know.

and touching back to the intertwining of songs, the redundancy of lyrics is so fun. some may argue it a lazy tactic, but imo it works so well that it's not. not even close. i've said it once and i'll say it again, "alone together" and "young volcanoes" are sisters to me, twins even. "this is the road to ruin," "when rome's in ruins" / "and we're starting at the end," "we're the beginning of the end" / "do you wanna feel beautiful," "do you wanna feel a little beautiful, baby." and the "and i said, i'll check in tomorrow if i don't wake up dead" between "alone together" and "rat a tat"? i love it so, so very much.

and of course the call backs in "save rock and roll" to "chicago is so two years ago" and "sugar, we're going down" is very fun and a [leonardo decaprio whistling and pointing at the tv] moment.

anyways, back to your original ask on color before i got completely side tracked (but felt i had to discuss). i am so glad you brought up the various calls to red in the youngblood chronicles as i have a project i've been working on for save rock and roll's 11th anniversary and it heavily revolves around red. and i can't elaborate because even i have no idea where i'm taking this lmao. i'm just going where the wind (curious thoughts) takes me.

so yeah. sorry for going off. i was on topic mostly until i became distracted by lyrics and the little cd booklet.

tl;dr: you are 100% right when you said "so many of the song titles directly use imagery of fire, or miserable, all-consuming heat" as the album is a scorcher in so many ways, and certainly is red through and through.

[andydrysdalerogers]

The Type You Save ~ S I X

Detective James Barnes hasn't seen the love of his life in three years. Since the night she was almost caught stealing a painting. He knows it was her and she disappeared leaving him confused and heart broken.

Alexandra Richards never expected to be pulled back into her old life two years after she left it. She had found love and a home and was happy. Until a note blackmailed her to take one last job. Three years later she walked into the last person she expected to see in San Francisco. Because he lived in New York right?

They always put family before everything. And he would do anything to get his family back. Because she's the type you save.

TW: mob, death, smut, rape intentions, angst, guns, family abandonment, dub-con, manipulation

I do NOT give permission for my work to be translated or reposted on here or any other site, even if you give me credit. DO NOT REPOST MY FICS. Reblogs, comments, likes, and feedback ALWAYS appreciated

Divider by @firefly-graphics

Previous : F I V E

Series Masterlist ~ Main Masterlist

“Are you my daddy?” 

Alex froze.  How?  How does she explain to her almost three-year-old about his father?  But it was like instinct when James opened his mouth.  

“Yea buddy.  I am.  I was able to come back for you and your mama.”  

“Yay!  Does that mean we can ride in your police car?” 

Alex tried to stop the giggle that escaped but failed.  Of course, that’s what Drew wanted, to ride in the police car.  

“I don’t have it with me, but we can later ok?” 

“Okays.” Drew started to exam the badge again.  “Can we go to the park daddy?”   

James looked at Alex.  She nodded.  “Sure pal.  Let’s get your backpack.”  

“Okays!  Miss Wanda!” He yelled as he ran for his bag.  

James drew Alex in.  “He’s perfect,” he whispered.  

“He’s you,” she replied with a smile.  

Drew came back, an oversized pack on his back holding his teacher’s hand.  “Miss Wanda look!” 

Wanda came over and gave a hug to Alex.  “Hey sweetie.”  She looked at James.  “Well, that photo does not do you justice.”  She smiled.  “Wanda Maximoff.”  

“James Barnes. Uh, how’s he doing? That’s what I should ask right?” 

Alex and Wanda giggled at his hesitance.  “He’s very bright.  He’s almost at kindergarten level with colors, shapes.  He can almost write, and he can read like a champ.”  

“Oh.  Well, he gets that from his mom,” James smirked, get a blush from Alex.  “Thank you for teaching him Miss Maximoff.”  

“Please, its Wanda and its my pleasure.  Been watching him since he was a baby.  I live next door to Ale,” she explained. “I kept an eye out on both of them.”  

The news that someone was watching for his girl and his child.  Something he wish he had the chance to do.  Something he wasn’t going to shrink away from it. It made him angry that Grey took this away from him. “Thank you, Wanda.  Really.” 

“Well Drew, I’ll see you tomorrow.”  

“Yes Miss Wanda.” Drew hugged his teacher again before taking James’s hand.  They headed back to the street and to the park that was down the street from the guys’ apartment. Drew reached up for his mother’s hand and started to swing in between.  James stopped, took his back pack and then continued to swing him.  The moment was so domestic, so normal, something they were both missing.  

Once they reached the park, Drew took off to the playground and James and Alex sat on the bench. “Tell me about him.”  

“His birthday is April 5th.  He was a big baby, 9lbs.  I went full term, all nine months. No complications.  I had Nat and Wanda to help me through … through most of it.” She swallowed.  

“Nat?” 

“Natasha Romanoff.  She’s a hacker, one of the best in the world.  She and I met at MIT before I left.  She went freelance.  We kept in touch and when I ran, she took me in.  Help me get set up with some work and found the apartment next to Wanda.  When she thought I was sick, she took me to the clinic.  Said she didn’t know you, but you would murder her if something happened to me.”  

“Damn right I would.   Will I get to meet her?” 

“If you want.” Alex chewed her lip. “What do we tell Steve?” 

“The truth doll.  He deserves the truth.”  

“Call him.  Maybe he can meet us here?” 

“Sure.” James texted Steve who replied he was on the way when Drew came running. “Daddy! Push me.” 

“So bossy.  Like your mama,” he said with a smirk.  “Ok Chief let’s go.”  He picked up his son and tossed him up, with squeals.  Alex held her breath until he was back on James’s arms.  

“Not ok, Barnes.”  

“What?  I would never drop him.” James threw her a wink as he carried Drew back to the swings.  

Alex sat, going over the last few hours, unbelieving that her family was being put back together.  Would she finally have a chance to be happy?  Or did she need to wait for the other shoe to drop? She jumped when a hand settled on her shoulder.  

“Sorry Alex.  I thought you heard me.” Steve came and sat down next to her.  “Where’s Bucky?” 

“He’s… he’s with our son on the swings.”  She couldn’t look at Steve.  She knew the face she would see if she looked up.  

“Son?” Steve looked over to the playground where James was with a little boy.  “Alex?” 

“Found out a couple of weeks after I left.  I had to tell him first, Stevie.” She looked up at their best friend. “It’s the main reason I stayed away.”  

“Oh Alex. I’m so sorry you had to do this alone.”  Steve wrapped and arm around her and they watched James with Drew. Alex told everything to Steve before Drew came running over.  He stopped short of Steve.  

“Who are you?  Don’t touch my mama!” 

James came running over and smiled when Steve removed his arm around Alex.  He kneeled down to the ground next to Drew.  “Drew, that is your uncle Stevie.  He’s mama and daddy’s best friend.”  

“Uncle Stevie?” 

“Yeah Chief.  He’s a policeman just like me.  You wanna say hi?”  Little Drew nodded.  He took his father’s hand and they walked towards his mother. “Drew, this is Uncle Stevie.  Steve this is Drew Richards-Barnes.”   

“Hello Drew.  It’s nice to meet you.”  Steve gave the little boy his hand.  Drew looked up to his dad, who nodded, before taking his hand.  

“You’re big.  Like daddy. Do you have a badge too?” 

Steve chuckled before pulling the badge out for Drew to see.  Drew took it and examined it.  He beamed that it was the same as his fathers.  

“He looks just like you Bucky.”  

“I know.  Did she?” 

“Yeah, she told me.  God, you’ve procreated.  Never thought I would see the day when there was a mini you running loose on the streets.”  

“Shut it punk. He’s perfect.” His eyes stayed on Drew as he sat on the ground to examine the badge.  He stood up to give it back to Steve.  

“Mama?  I’m hungry.”  

“Ok baby.  Let’s get some lunch.”  She went to pick him up, but James was quicker, pulling his son into his arms.  

“Whatcha want Chief?”  

“Macaroni!”  

“That happens to be my specialty.  Let’s go!” He put Drew on his shoulders as they walked back to the guys’ apartment.  

Alex pulled out her phone as they walked.  

A: Hey you  N: was wondering when you would text  A: why  N: I can meet you   A: How did you know  N: When you left the diner abruptly, I turned on your phone  A: Nat!  N: Ale  A: We promised  N: and only when we thought the other was in trouble.  I have the address  

Alex shook her head as she put her phone away.  Steve looked at her curiously.  “What?” 

“Who were you texting?” 

“Nat.  My best friend here.  She’s coming over.”  

James looked at her.  “What?” 

“We track each other, for safety reasons.  When I left the diner earlier in a rush, she hacked my phone and started listening.”  

“Jesus, Allie, you’re ok with that?” 

“She’s just watching out for me.  She knows about Grey and this is just a precaution.  She’s been wanting to meet you.” 

“Meet a woman who is stalking you.  Yeah ok.”  

Steve interrupts, trying to defuse the tension. “Is she cute?” 

“Don’t Stevie.  Doesn’t play for our team.”  

Once in the apartment, James set up Drew with some paper and markers while he went into the kitchen to make some boxed mac and cheese.  Alex slides her arms around him.  “Are you mad?” 

“I’m trying to go over all of this.  I mean, this day has been surreal.  You were gone yesterday and today you’re back and we have a kid.  Really, I’m surprise I’m not losing my shit on the couch.”  James looks into the living room where Drew is showing Steve his drawing. “This is real.”  

“Yeah, it is.  Blows my mind too.”  She kissed his neck, hearing him hum in pleasure.  

James turned around in her arms, wrapping his around her. “Let’s go to dinner tonight.  Just you and me.”   

“What about Drew?  I don’t have a babysitter.”  

“Steve can watch Drew.  He’s a giant kid himself. Besides, when you move in here, he’s gotta get used to the baby.”  

“Whoa, slow your roll?  When am I moving?” 

“Seriously? Alex, we are married.  Of course, you’re moving.”  

“I just assumed you would move in with me.”  

“And leave Steve by himself? The punk can barely take care of himself.”  

“He lived alone in New York.”  

“And was at our place more often than his own.  We have an extra room here.  We can make it Drew’s room.  Its be us, then Drew, then Steve.  It works.”  

Alex pulled back. “You really want us to move?” 

“This weekend.  Tomorrow, tonight if I could.  I need to have my family with me Alex.  That you, that’s Drew and that’s Steve.”  

Alex could see the desperation in his eyes, the fear that if he let go, she would slip away.  She looked at her son, who was now in Steve’s lap reading a book.  “What happens if Grey finds out were back together?” 

“He won’t.  You never changed your name, right?” 

“Legally no.  Here I go by Nicola.  Nicola Barnes. James cocked a brow at her. “I get paid in cash as a freelancer.” 

“Ok, so let’s get your name legally changed.  You can be Alex Barnes, like you were meant to be. He won’t find you, they aren’t looking.” He pulled in for a kiss and Alex was thrown back to their second date.  

Four years ago… second date… 

“So, what would be the ideal family look like,” Alex asked, chewing on the end of her straw.  

“We are going deep now,” James said with a chuckle.  “Let me think about this.” He rested his elbows on the table and head in hands, staring at her. “You, with my last name, and like four kids. Big house with an apartment for Steve because I know that punk would still not have a girlfriend.”  

Alex giggled.  “And what makes you think that I’ll take your name.  I happen to like my last name.”  

“You could hyphenate it.  Considering I don’t think you’ve ever told me your last name.”  

“Oh, well I can’t help that you flashed your badge when you paid last time and I got yours, Detective Barnes.”  

“So you’re not gonna tell me.”  He lifted her hand and placed small kisses on each knuckle.  

Alex swooned at the gesture.  “Richards.  Alex Richards.”  

“Beautiful,” he said with a smile.  “But Alex Barnes sounds so much better.”  

“I’ve known you a week.  How about we give it a year before this topic comes back up.”  

“Got yourself a deal doll.”  

“Don’t call me doll.”  

“Alex Barnes does sound better,” Alex whispered into James’s ear.  His face split into a big smile.  “But after you take me on a date, Detective.”  

“Its Inspector now.  But I’ll always be just Jamie for you, doll.”  

NEXT

@patzammit

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@tinkerbelle67

@before-we-get-started

@bunnyforhim

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@peaceinourtime82

[anatypicalwoman]

We often hear stories about family and romantic relationships with narcissistic individuals, with information that helps identify narcissistic mothers and husbands in particular. However, little is said about the other victims of these people.

I was a victim of my business partner. This story is stuck within me because I can't share it with many people; those I can talk to about it are tired of hearing it. I sound like a broken record. Things started to go downhill a very long time ago. Here I am, sitting on the floor of my house after finding more evidence of the ongoing scam through an Instagram post and a routine check of the bank statements (one of the few things I still have access to in the company, where I hold half of the fucking shares). Despicable. Psychopath.

The clinic's reception area had a hand-painted graffiti mural by two amazing artists—one of whom is still an employee of the company—which held so much meaning. Today, I saw that she had it painted over with a dirty white and slapped on tacky stickers from Shopee. Tacky. She was always tacky and cheap. Looking at the bank statements, I saw that she hired a new management system (ERP). It's a huge management decision, and I wasn’t consulted or informed. Tomorrow, I’ll have to send an email demanding that I be given an administrator-level user, a login, and a password. Without it, I won’t even be able to monitor the financial transactions that are happening, as she has already completely stripped me of my management rights.

One year, three months, and 26 days ago, this woman fired me from my own company on the day I returned from a psychiatric leave, which I had to take because of her manipulative games. And even today, I’m sitting here, watching her ERASE me from the project to which I dedicated my body and soul for two uninterrupted years. She’s erasing me without compensating me financially. And I can't do anything. I've done everything I could. Now, I can only watch, and I can't even talk to anyone about it because no one can bear it anymore. Most of the people I can talk to are also victims, directly or indirectly, of her. Everyone is exhausted.

Today, one year, three months, and 26 days later, I’m the only one who still feels the pain. And it hurts. It also hurts because I still miss her. Obviously, I now know that I only ever knew a meticulously curated version of her. Yet, I miss that person, even though I know she doesn’t exist. And that pain is so intense. I feel utterly alone because no one can stand to hear me talk about this anymore. And I’m angry because I feel small and petty for being angry that she’s erasing, literally, the values I stood for, replacing them with something beige, plastic, and tacky. She’s putting herself in my place, and that infuriates me even more because she was always there. I always felt the pangs of her envy, of how great I was in that space. I have never felt so good anywhere as I did in that company. I built it that way, and I was so proud of what I had created. So yes, it makes me angry when I see a once-beautiful wall painted beige. And it makes me sad to realize, once again, how foolish I was. Because her malice was always there. I was just too captivated to notice.

[spockandawe]

Okay! I'm rapidly reaching the point of needing some creative self-care, or I'm going to crash even more viciously than I'm already starting to. Bad things: work is about to be SO fucking intense for the rest of the month, and while my home is unpacked, it is Comically unorganized. Good things: being unable to walk to work leaves me with more free time and less exhaustion per day, and I've recently refreshed myself on what supplies i have. I also am all set to start figuring out how to paint a house as soon as I can test my samples and clear a room. This will scratch the novelty itch, so i can be responsible and avoid buying new things. But i also can't lose focus on the organizing or I'll Adjust and never finish 😂

Let me see

Crochet in general: crochet is what I've been patching the mounting anxiety with, and i DO want to use up yarn, but it's hard on my wrist already, I can't afford to get too deep.

Baby blanket: almost done, could probably finish tomorrow in meetings, but because it was pretty bland, it won't be that fulfilling

Big Boi blanket: god, it's been years, I want to finish, but i WILL need to buy some yarn

Rocky horror lips: tedious single crochet, fun concept, but need to avoid wrist fuckery

Cross-stitch starscream: yes! I want to do this!! But this will be the opposite of quick gratification

Art........?: ALSO YES, goddammit, i want to figure out the stupid tablet! But good LORD, it's hard to decide what to do. And I'm in one of those phases where I'm not FAST, and I'm not vibing with what i make. The solution is just to draw more often, i know. But fuck.

Hc/mq: had a conceptual breakthrough, maybe? But i still don't know how it will proceed, so idk whether to commit the energy

Bwx/xl: this is half done already, AND outlined, I don't know why I can't do it. If i make myself, maybe i can find my groove

Lqg fic: it'll be long and intimidating 😭

Bingge lite: it's been 84 years...... But i really really really really love it and want to be able to share it. But the scope will be Horrendous, it may need percolation and warmer weather

Raksura core: i, uh, um 🫥 (i want to finish it! I really do! I can't focus worth SHIT)

Quilting: that would be good! Use up stuff! I want to be better! But god, the PREP WORK

Addendum: can i think of a fandom quilt i could pull off? Even if it was. Idk. Bingqiu colors. That might help me focus. But i also need to use up my stash :T

Long furby: would be good. I've had the materials for-fucking-ever

Pyrography: ooh, maybe. Especially if I can find art i dont have to compose. But if i set off the smoke alarm while it's this gross outside ill Die

BOOKS: heavy lifts and decision paralysis all around. Could be star wars (long, not for me, have to match existing volume), cnovel (several wips, but each is so much work to format, good god), ofic (not for me, also have to revamp formatting), ilcbt latest edition (needs the luxury treatment, which requires brain), pof latest edition (needs the luxury treatment, which requires brain), and all of the most appealing projects need a lot of materials, and I'm still in debt, lmao

Peerless fic: I've had the concept locked down for years, but i need to refresh on more of their late-stage characterization before feeling confident

Fourteenth year of chenghua fic: i also have the concept locked down! But i want to see the final evolution of wang zhi's relationship to the other two first

2ha fic: I ALSO HAVE THE CONCEPT LOCKED DOWN. but i still haven't...... finisheddddddddd, and this is going to need to be a fairly lengthy fic to wrangle xue meng in a believable way

[mia-cot]

What if John and Charlie met (du'lie edition).

tags: hector soft. is jealous.

"So cute and shy" – Charlie looked with interest at the man who was sitting at the table opposite him. Just yesterday, Charlie had called him on the phone to help Hector lure new people. But who knew he was so cute.

– So you're a teacher? – Charlie tilted his head to the side, taking the tube in his mouth and sucking on a milkshake. At Charlie's request, all sorts of goodies began to be taken to the island. Hector didn't mind spoiling him.

John nodded and replied:

– Yes. I teach the guys. To be more precise, I am a professor.

Charlie continued:

– Great! I miss the time when I studied at the institute a little, eh.. there were so many hopes then, – Charlie leaned his elbow on the table and apparently thought a little, remembering his youth.

– Yes, they are still optimists. – John laughed a little, sipping his drink in a glass, – Mr. Du'Met, and your tours of the house will start tomorrow?

Of course, he and Hector agreed that he would now play this role, so Charlie responded:

– I think we can start today. Have your students already checked in?

– Yes. But it's late, I think they've already gone to bed, – John shrugged.

– Then… How about I do it for you personally? – He smiled at John with his trademark smile that could charm many.

– Well… I'm not sure… - despite the fact that John now also wanted to go to bed, looking at this smile, he was no longer sure about it.

“Du'Met is such a kind man” – John thought to himself.

– Come on! Let's have a little chat, – Charlie became interested in John's appearance and wanted to observe him a little more before he was killed.

– Okay, it would probably be really useful to know at least a little about this house before the real tour begins, – John gave up under the pressure of this cheerful man.

– Great! Thank you for agreeing. Let's get started? – Charlie got up from his seat and motioned for John to come with him.

***

At this moment in the camera room.

Du'Met watched the two of them sitting in the living room and chatting. Of course, he read Charlie like an open book and assumed that he would want to get to know John better. Still, such a similarity in appearance…

Du'Met was overcome by some nasty feeling that poisoned his taste buds, giving a taste of bitterness on the tongue.

– Char-rlie… – voice was low, almost offended.

When the people from the camera got up from their chairs, he watched them for a while until the people stopped in the corridor with the paintings.

Du'Met picked up the axe that had been leaning against the wall all this time and headed for the numbered door.

***

– What terrible pictures! - John was uncomfortable in these ordinary corridors, which made his skin crawl all over.

– Yeah, at first I couldn't even walk past them myself, – he shrugged his shoulders and stared at John again. The professor couldn't help but notice how Charlie was looking at him all the time, as if seeing something amazing in front of him.

– It must be hard to live in such a house alone...

– Well… not quite alone.

– Wife?

– …no – Charlie shook his head, waiting for the next answer.

– Oh, maybe one of the workers? – he remembered someone walking around in a yellow uniform in the backyard.

– Wrong again. Ah-ha. You have one last attempt, Professor, – Charlie crossed his arms over his chest, looking somehow too confident in such a pose.

John thought about it. As a professor, he wanted to give a correct and accurate answer to the question. According to the opinion that he had about Charlie, he could say for sure that this man did not have children, he was too carefree. Then…

– …husband?

Charlie thought for a moment what to say. Is it a husband? Somewhere in the distance, a floorboard creaked and they both looked in that direction, the sound coming from behind John.

– Did any of the students get up? John was about to head over there and see who it was wandering around, but a hand on his shoulder stopped him.

– Don't go there.

– But why? – John did not understand the reason for the refusal, but did not contradict the owner of the house.

Indeed. Why, Charlie?

– It's just old floors, nothing more. Trust me. Let's go further, there will be a room with a piano and a library. You like to read, right? – Charlie quickly changed the subject.

John nodded, he looked again in the direction of the sound, but he didn't hear anything else. Only pitch black.

"How creepy" – John was already tempted to leave this house.

They chatted all the way. Charlie led them through these corridors freely, but sometimes he turned around abruptly and they started walking back, as if Charlie had taken the wrong road.

In fact, Charlie was getting lost from Du'Met, whom he sensed ahead. As soon as his fingertips tingled and his hearing strained, he could see a white shadow ahead.

He was able to dodge it very cleverly. He was getting too comfortable in the hotel.

But he played a very bad game. Charlie so needed to make sure that John really looks like Hector and it doesn't seem to him. Passing by a room with numerous mirrors, he decided to look into it.

– How do you like this one? The glass is arranged so that a person feels the walls closer and closer as they are in it… and eventually suffocated, – Charlie looked around and looked at this thicket of mirrors, as if it was not a murder weapon, but really just an exhibit.

John began to feel dizzy from this. He took off his glasses and rubbed the bridge of his nose, reducing the strain on the eye sockets.

Charlie looked at him just as he took off his glasses. It wasn't his imagination. It was true that there was a man who was phenomenally similar to Du'Met.

– Impossible… Charlie couldn't believe his own eyes.

“How?.. How is this possible?...”

– Mr. Du'met, did you say something? – John looked at Charlie through his glasses, putting them back on.

– No, no, – Charlie waved away, looking away and digesting. Hector did not invite this particular person for nothing. He always selected people for the island very carefully.

“He himself became interested in what kind of person is this?”

Nearby, something flashed in all the glass. Appeared and disappeared. It's like 25 frames. The room was suddenly cold. Charlie tensed. John apparently didn't notice anything, continuing to inspect the room with the naked eye.

The tips of fingers tingled, breathing became quieter.

He's here.

– Professor, we have to… – before Charlie could finish, a massive figure stepped out of the shadows, covering John's entire height with darkness.

Blue light from a small window at the back framed the figure of Du'Met. The axe in his hands spoke for itself. The professor stood motionless until Granthem's hand took the axe more comfortably and it flashed in the light of the moon.

– W-what? – John screamed and rushed out of the room, taking Charlie by the hand, – run! There's someone here!

Charlie, not understanding what was happening now, rather by inertia ran after John.

He turned his head back and saw a pair of eyes in a slit in the mask looking at him.

He saw them wide open and looking at him with surprise mixed with excitement and concern. Those eyes…

Eyes unlike any other.

They ran out of the room and a pair of eyes disappeared behind the wall.

***

The masked man remained standing in place in this room. Looking at the doorway for a few seconds, where two people had just escaped.

The mirrors pressed down on him. His figure looked at him everywhere, as if in mockery:

"Ha! He ran away with it right in front of you! He's better! BETTER!"– these words sounded in his head, making him choke.

He pressed his palms to his ears in an attempt to calm these sounds.

– Charlie… Charlie… – it was as if he was trying to call him, to ask him to stay with him in this room and not leave him.

***

– Mister, please run a little faster! – John shouted ahead.

What should Charlie do now? Continue to play your role or show your cards?

Charlie decided it would be better if everything went according to Du'Met's plan and he didn't interfere anymore. Although everything was already not going as planned.

They ran into a room filled with old chairs everywhere. It smelled a little dusty and old.

– Who was that? – John, catching his breath, immediately moved on to the question.

Charlie was silent. Thinking about what he should say. They probably have 2 minutes before Du'Met looks at the cameras to see where they are.

– I-i do not know, – Charlie had to try to get back into the role of an ignorant person, – let's get to your students and leave the building together.

John nodded and replied:

– Yes… let's.

Charlie was the first to leave the room, and they moved to the right, walking quietly on their toes.

A fork appeared before them: to the right or to the left.

– I remember exactly, there were no forks here… only straight corridors – John frowned and looked at Charlie.

– I know where we are. Come on, – Charlie's acting exceeded all expectations. He was able to simulate shaking hands, trembling voice and unsteady gait.

Charlie kept an eye on the cameras, which are located in inconspicuous places.

He knew he was watching. What was Du'Met's plan now? Was he mad at him? Or maybe, on the contrary, he liked that Charlie was playing with his prey, passing his fleshy part over his lips, but don't let him bite. But that look…

Charlie wanted to discuss this with Hector the next time they met in private. But now it was necessary to bring John to the students, and then Hector would figure it out himself.

Charlie was in front, and John was two steps behind. There was a click and Charlie quickly turned around to push John towards himself, forward, and himself step back and stay on the other side of the wall, where John had just walked and whom Hector wanted to separate.

Charlie miraculously managed to say:

– Down the corridor to the right, then forward and left! Number 308! – the wall slammed shut between them and Charlie was left in complete darkness. He did everything he could to prolong this man's life a little. But he broke Hector's plans again. What will happen to him now?…

Charlie turned around and looked exactly where the camera was. A look of fright appeared in his eyes. He just realized what he was doing.

He lowered his head guiltily. His hands clenched into fists. He felt lousy about what he had just done.

He slowly walked forward to clear his head. He wandered aimlessly, as if sure that Hector was now occupied by the other five people. So he decided to head to the library to sit there for a book until this night is over.

***

As soon as he arrived, he began to choose a book for himself. There were old but interesting books from the 1870s and 1890s. He especially enjoyed reading the history of Chicago.

Sometimes the name of Holmes or other serial killers was mentioned there. But nothing about who caught them. He was so sad to realize that this was one of the reasons why Hector broke down. After all, really, no one cares about those who caught all these murderers.

Charlie sighed a little louder than usual and reached for the spine of one of the books.

Suddenly a shadow covered him and the next second a hand appeared in his field of vision, which stretched in the same direction. An index finger in a medical glove pulled the book by its spine, pressing on it and pulling the book half out.

Charlie was scared because he was sure that Du'Met's company would definitely not bother him until dawn. He wanted to turn around, but he was quickly pressed against the shelf with another body. And his hand, which had not reached the book, was taken in the palm of his hand and his fingers were intertwined together.

The man bent down to the back of Charlie's head and whispered:

– Charlie… – he sounded a little hoarse, offended, but still the tone was calm, as if Du'Met was looking for him and finally found him, calmed down.

– I'm here, – Charlie tried to turn his head, but he was turned back.

Du'Met made the double sound that people usually make when they say “no” without opening their mouths.

Du'Met's hand released Charlie's jaw and rested on his shoulder. Squeezing a little harder than if he just wanted to squeeze Charlie.

– It hurts me, Hector… - Du'Met, as if burned, removed his hand, – Hector, is something wrong?

Du'Met made a grumbling sound, as if he remembered that he was supposed to be angry at this man who was standing in front of him.

He separated their fingers and put his head on Charlie's shoulder, wrapping his arms across him. He snuggled up to him so gently, touching Charlie with his whole body.

The cold coating of the mask touched Charlie's hot neck, but he didn't budge. What's happening? Why was Hector suddenly distracted by him?

Du’Met, as if after a long separation, hugged Charlie so tightly. Or if he heard the words “I'm leaving” from Charlie and tried to stop him, forcing him to stay in his arms forever.

Charlie bent his head down to touch Du'Met's head, and with his hands he covered the other man's hands. He closed his eyes, listening to Du'Met's deep breathing.

They stayed in this cradling state for a little longer before Du'Met turned Charlie around to face him and their eyes finally met.

The mask was slightly splattered with blood.

“So he was there after all?” – Charlie was surprised how little time it took Du'Met this time to finish with the band.

The masked man's gaze was tired and a little sad.

Charlie's hand rested on Du'Met's cheek, which was half covered by the mask. Something definitely happened. And his heart told him that it had to do with John.

– Charlie… doesn't like Hector anymore? – his words were not a threat, and his eyes became a little wet at some point, his usually threatening pose now had nothing to do with a threat. On the contrary, it was as if he was trying to defend himself in Charlie's arms. The look was saturated with hope.

– What? – he raised his eyebrows in surprise. For a couple of seconds, just running my gaze over Hector's eyes, trying to figure out what's going on.

It finally dawned on him.

– Is it because of that professor?– Charlie gave the exact reason, provoking the older man to lose his temper, his hand abruptly rose above Charlie, he pressed his head and closed his eyes waiting for the blow,

– P-please n… - Charlie did not have time to finish his plea, as a fist crashed into the shelf, very close to his head. There was a crunch of knuckles… He opened one eye a little. He saw Hector looming over him. Closing his eyes in a fit of anger. He remembered how his palm cracked after the blow and exclaimed:

– Hector! You're going to hurt your arm like that! – Charlie quickly took Hector's injured hand in his palms, removing the glove from it and examining the bruise. Blood was oozing from several places. But Hector didn't seem to feel anything. He just stared at Charlie's worried gaze that was glued to his knuckles.

“That doesn't mean he loves you. He's just a kind person. He's worried, but not because it's you” – the voice in Hector's head continued to poison his mind.

Suddenly, he abruptly pulled his hand out of Charlie's gentle fingers that were stroking his palm.

– Hector… – Charlie raised his head, he met a look he had never seen on Hector's face. It was desperation that was mixed with deep affection.

Charlie understood everything.

– Do you really think so?

Hector looked up into the corner. Charlie turned his head in the direction of Du'Met's gaze.

Cameras.

– Didn't you invite this person because you also wondered why he looked so much like you?

Hector nodded.

– Well, I was also interested in it, – Charlie smiled gently and walked up to Hector and hugged him, – I just wanted to take a closer look at him before you kill him. nothing more, – he raised his head and looked at Hector from above, – do you really think that I will betray you so easily? – he asked with resentment in his voice.

He said these words while looking straight into Hector's eyes. It was the only way to prove something to this man. He could see the lie in his eyes. And Charlie knew that, so he didn't break eye contact while Hector analyzed him.

After a few seconds, Du'Met hugged Charlie back and hugged him like the most precious thing in his life.

– Charlie… – his voice was without any neurosis, as before. In one word, he could tell Charlie what he was feeling right now, but that one word was not enough for him to express all his emotions, so he continued:

– I love you, Charlie.

*** WELL. I FINISHED IT. SORRY FOR THE MANY LETTERS, BUT I NEEDED A JEALOUS HECTOR!!!!! THANKS FOR READING, FRIEND :)

[the-enzyme]

I repainted my fan-art Ken Kaneki (MYou Bettina male) for the second time. I had enhanced the 1st face up I gave him previously. However, I decided to attempt painting him the way I learned to do 1:6 sculpts, form that one (15 episodes) tutorial I watched. I was impatient however, which I regret to no tomorrow. So, I was able to get most of the pigmented skin texture on there with mostly acrylics. Then I grew impatient, because I was taking too long (it was dumb of me, terribly so!). 

I am still super happy with how he looks despite using pastels and ruining the beautiful subtleness I had going on. I did take progress photos, but they ar more awful than these. I am of course heavily disappointed in my hair strokes -- my eyebrows and eyelashes are horrid. However, I am happy with how much more mature he appears, due to the heavy dark brows, so I’ll probably be keeping them for a while (before I start obsessing and repaint him again!). 

I need to get a new pointy brush, because I managed to already ruin the one I was using to paint my Sephiroth and Leon 1:6 head sculpts. Bettina has much, much larger eyes, and I was still not able to get not-so-clean, but kind of sharp lines like on Sephy. I wasn’t able to do a better job on Leon either, but he has tinier eyes and they were sculpted way off, so I kind of have to cheat with the way I shade his lower eyelid to make it look like they are a more accurate shape. Leaving me to having to pain the lashes on an area that is hard to do so (and yes, I also suck, so there’s that too!). 

Still, I am super happy with my Kaneki fan-art doll so far. I wish he had broader shoulders, and overall, more lean-young-male body proportions, like Kaneki has in the anime. Instead of noodle arms and child-bearing-hips. Besides the proportions, I am in-love with this tiny face! He’s so pretty and has great lips, as he as intended to be female, but can be a very versatile sculpt! (: Now I just need to start making some actual Kaneki inspired clothes and maybe a more accurate wig, as painful as that will be. I was thinking of this wig as his default one, but it makes him look cone-headed. Lol! DX