#and come up with the most detailed imaginary scenarios

[starcurtain]

Another Haikaveh Fanfic I Want to Read

It's a 5+1 compilation but it's just all the super soft, embarrassingly domestic moments Alhaitham is daydreaming will happen after he and Kaveh finally get together (he is certain this is going to happen someday)... Plus the timeskip where the best one actually comes true, of course!

[leidensygdom]

I gotta say, one of the wildest radical transphobes' talking "points" is probably bathroom discourse. I can't even put to words how utterly detached from reality it is. It's terminally online stuff.

So, bathrooms. I don't know if somehow other people's realities are somehow vastly different from mine, but I feel like the extreme clear divide between "men's" and "women's" bathrooms is just not real. Where I live, stalls are often gendered, but how much they get used in that way is far less consistent.

For example: If the place had only the space to make one bathroom accessible, it's gonna be the women's bathroom. Always. It doesn't mean only disabled women have access to bathrooms- It means that the women's bathroom is also going to be used by disabled people. And this is common. Really common. Maybe it's because the women's bathroom tends to need more space- For pad dispensers and trash cans, for baby-changing stations (yes, I hate that these are only on the women's bathroom usually), and so on. Now- You see a guy enter the women's bathroom. Are you gonna micro-analize if the guy looks disabled enough to use it, or are you going to wash your hands and go on with your life?

Again, baby-changing stations are almost always located on the women's bathroom. It sucks- It should be in all bathrooms. But it's how it is. You see a cis guy enter with a kid. Or maybe not even with a kid- Just enters, wanders around, finds the baby-changing station, gets a diaper from the dispenser and leaves. Are you gonna throw a fit or just let this guy handle his kid?

Bathrooms get cleaned on the regular. A lot of times, you may wanna go there, and get told it's being cleaned, and just get asked to use the other gender's bathroom. Cleaning can take hours. If the men's bathroom is being cleaned and everyone is now using the women's, are you going to deem the bathroom to be the world's unsafest place or are you just go take a pee and leave?

Fucking hell, sometimes the stall you want to go to is incredibly dirty. It happens. No need to get on details. Just the kind of stuff that makes you want to not use it. Or maybe it's clogged, or maybe it's not working. Maybe there's a note saying "Broken, do not enter". Do you cry about it or just go find another stall- Which may be on the other fucking gender's bathroom?

Most times I'll use whatever bathroom is available. One is busy? Ok, let me get to the other one. I'm AFAB and while I don't present femininely, I still look like a woman to most people. Have I ever been in danger because I cleaned my hands besides someone with a dick? No. Grow the fuck up. This isn't even rare. People will switch bathrooms for speed. People will switch bathrooms because one of them is out of paper. Because one of them is out of soap.

The mall in my current city recently installed "Family" bathrooms. They're not being marketed as unisex, or inclusive, or anything. Just "family" bathrooms. For everyone. They're great. It's the bathroom everyone will use- Men, women, anything in between and outside of that, kids, disabled people, etc. There's a bunch of stalls adapted to different needs. There's accessible stalls. There's pad and diaper dispensers. There's stalls that have a big toilet and a little toilet so parents can go with their kids. There's tall sinks and short sinks- So disabled people and kids can reach.

And, to nobody's surprise, there's no reports whatsoever of any sort of assault in them.

I'm just. I don't know. I'm sorry you can't detach the existence of a dick near you from immediate assault. I don't know why that changes in the context of a bathroom- I've never (in my long life of using whatever bathroom) been in danger for that. And I'm talking as someone who has had some unsavory experiences in other situations. Grow the fuck up and maybe stop basing your views on imaginary scenarios y'all need to come up with to justify your hatred of a minority. Maybe if y'all got off your keyboards and went outside for once, you'd realize bathrooms work much differently from whatever weird ideal you have formed about them.

[citrustan]

lovefool [6/6] (jjk)

pairing: jeon jungkook × reader

genre: angst, fluff (sort of), smut

summary: your boyfriend’s pretty girl best friend keeps hogging up your alone time with him.

word count: 5k

warnings: pretty tame mentions of parental negligence, almost smut at the end.

note: yeaah this is it for lovefool !! um 😁 i had fun writing it! i will add to this au through drabbles as i've already mentioned before :D hope you like it! and sorry it's a little longer than the other parts!

1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6

There are around a little less than three full sentences that you’ve conjured up to say to your boyfriend. In your haste of being quick (and dramatic) after considering Jungkook’s schedule, you were NOT ready for the conversation you needed to have.

One would assume you’re only running away from your problems which would still be okay because then you’d have time. The time you need to spend, sincerely thinking about exploring your options.

Things may seem bleak now but there’s always daylight after a dark night. Unless, you account for the Arctic Circle during summers, then this analogy doesn’t make sense, but you know you have a thing for cliches and the dramatic.

“_____, bloody shower already! Wash your hair so I can dye it tomorrow!” Sana’s screech brings you out of your thoughts.

“I’m not sure I want to dye my hair, Sana, bleaching itself is scary...” - “Bleaching is the only scary part, genius. And I already bought pink dye and purple shampoo for you!”

“I’m sorry,” you frown.

Sana softens at your guilt-ridden demeanour, “Hey, it’s no biggie, it doesn’t expire until next year. I’m sure I can get Jungkook to convince you. You’ll have matching hair colours! It’s fucking cute, babe.”

Sana smiles sweetly. “Now, shower. Now, now.”

“I will! Soon.” You pout.

“Okay! See you in the hall room.” She pats you on your butt before strutting away.

You swear your indecisiveness is genetic. As much as you’d like to blame your family for yet another thing from a really long list of ‘defects’, it’s pointless and a waste of time. All of this was on you. And Yuna. And Jungkook, but mostly yourself.

Taehyung has called to check on you twice now and unsurprisingly, he refuses to disclose any details about what you might have to prepare for. ‘I’d much rather you speak directly to Jungkook, I really don’t want to risk changing your mind for the worse—or better. Just know I will continue being your friend no matter what comes out of this,’ he had said.

And that got you wondering.

Are you truly prepared for the ‘worse’ outcome?

You don’t want to deal with a breakup and you don’t want to deal with Yuna. It’s highly unlikely that you may never see her or Jungkook again after your presumed, hypothetical breakup. It’d kill you to see Jungkook still around the person who kinda sorta pushed you, his presumed and hypothetical ex-girlfriend, away.

Honestly, deep down, you really wouldn’t blame him if he stuck with her.

If you had a relationship like Jungkook and Yuna’s, you’d struggle to ‘choose’ as well. You don’t expect him to throw away years’ worth of a friendship for or at the cost of a two-month long relationship.

At the same time, you would most likely disintegrate if you saw them become more than just best friends. You almost retch at the imaginary scenario.

How funny would that be? Very not.

Instead of getting yourself worked up over what may be, you Rory Gilmore it up.

You make a ‘pro and con’ list.

It sounds unethical to base your decision to date or not to date on a list of whatever reasons, which could very well end up being shallow and more logic based than your emotions and feelings.

Lucky for you, you don’t have a single logical bone in your body. You’re frantic and last minute. The most planning you can do for this ‘conversation’ is this, no doubt, very trustworthy ‘pro and con’ list.

Jungkook communicates with you solely over text and it’s a lot less frequent than usual. It’s awkward because he doesn’t try to push anything on you and you didn’t expect it.

You can’t help but think he may slowly be pulling away from you.

The distance has done nothing but make you miss him and want him more but you’re worried it’s only because you’re afraid of losses and change. You’re scared he doesn’t feel the same for you. You don’t want to be on a different page than him.

Before you psych yourself out over the possibility of Jungkook not wanting to be with you, you prepare for your little list.

The notepad you use to scribble on was on Sana’s desk, out of your reach.

You frown, not wanting to move from the comfortable blanket and throw pillows you were tucked under.

You think about ringing Sana but you had bothered her enough with tucking you in earlier that day, so you forgo it.

Then, you mentally list your cons of breaking up--- you’d miss him, this would wreck you, it would possibly wreck him, Yuna would swoop in, Jungkook and Yuna would form a hate club and then they would kiss. 

The pros would be--- you will not go through an emotional break up that would destroy your routine for a while, Jungkook realises he liked Yuna all along and it’d be harder for him to break it off with you because he is the nicest man you've ever met.

And now, you realise you lack a clarity of thought and all your thoughts are based on your insecurities.

You want to call Dr. Min but it seems a little excessive and spineless to ask him what you should be talking about with Jungkook.

Thought dumping is always an option. You could leave it all up to Jungkook. Whatever his decision is, goes.

This is coming from a very cowardly side of you--- letting other people take control of you and your life. It’s difficult to unlearn something you’re so used to doing. Recognising it is a good first step, though. So says Dr. Min. You owe him your life for the changes he’s making for you.

You confessed to him how grateful you were but he’d insist it was a collaborative effort.

In all honesty, you want Jungkook so badly. You want to be consumed by him, give into him. And if you put your insecurities away, you would stop running from this wonderful man. You can acknowledge his inexperience but it’s not like you’re any better. In fact, you’re more childish than he is. You don’t know any better than he does.

It’s still a young relationship and it’d be such a shame if it ended so suddenly without reason.

The only aspect you need closure in is this inner war you have with yourself.

Again, it doesn’t happen overnight.  ‘Rome wasn't built in a day, but it burned in one.’ (I forget who says this.)

You despise those “self love” mantras--- love yourself, you’re beautiful, you’re perfect, believe in yourself, you’re enough, you deserve better--- it’s all a load of bollocks.

You know relationships are hard work, you know you have a lot to sort out within yourself, you know you have a lot to tell Jungkook about yourself and it’s never going to be perfect. Nothing is perfect.

In a way, you’re grateful for the little bumps because it trains you for future adversaries (?) too dramatic? No?

The little tremors reassure you that you’re on the right track. If it were all smooth and seamless, you’d be more suspicious and paranoid. Ironically, those are factors you experience now as well. For a different reason.

“Hey, doll.”

Your eyes blinked open. Was your brain messing with you or did you actually hear Jungkook?

You crane your neck up from the soft pillows. The pillows and blanket did not aid you in any way, pushing you down further.

“Jungkook?”

“I hope you don’t mind me coming to you first---” He paused at your expression.

Your face was a true index of your mind. Erratic. Disbelief. Confused. You swore you had decided to meet the following day.

“See, I waited till today and I couldn’t stop myself.” He continued.

You establish that he’s here. It settles in.

In a way, this is great, you aren’t overwhelmed by anxiety from waiting and overthinking more than you already have.

For some reason, you aren’t upset that he showed up before decided. After all, you did miss him.  

Sitting up on your bed, you watch him awkwardly shift his weight from one leg to another, debating on taking a step closer to you.

You’re really happy to see him yet you contemplate running into the bathroom to avoid him for a bit but immediately shoot that thought down.  

It’s only insecurity about your appearance. You wished you didn’t look like you hadn’t showered or slept or eaten well in three days.

The silence is so loud when the closing of the front door breaks it, indicating Sana’s leave. She gave you privacy.

“I had begun to forget what you looked like. It’s been so long.” Jungkook almost whispered.

It had been a little over two weeks.

The mention of your looks made you a little self-conscious.

“_____.”

“Hm?”

“Tell me what you’re thinking about... please. Do you want me to leave? I’ll come back tomorrow; I swear.”

You stretch your legs out on the bed, revealing your thick, fuzzy socks and unshaved legs. It didn’t bother you at the moment because you didn’t notice it.

You point to Sana’s bean bag with your toes, directing him to make himself comfortable. You hope she won’t mind and make a note to wipe it down just in case. He obliges.

Discreetly adjusting your night dress over your thighs under the blankets, you stare directly into his panicked looking eyes.

"_____..." He starts again. Bur you cut him off.

“Honestly?” You begin, “I’m a little annoyed.”

“Because of me?” Jungkook points to himself with his thumb.

You frown, “Kind of? But not really. I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?”

“No, I meant--- Jungkook, I thought- I had your word. About tomorrow? Not today.” You stutter, unsure of your tone.

“I know- it’s an asshole move to just, ignore you and force you to talk to me and I promise you, I will leave immediately if you don’t want me here. I just wanted to make sure you’re OKAY. I wanted to make sure you’re still… I don’t know- here, with me.” He looks worried but so well rested. Fresh? And pretty.

You would have no idea he was this worried just by looking at him.

You furrow your brows, “I won’t deny that it was an… asshole move, as you put it, but...“ You struggle to maintain eye contact with him. “I am happy to see you. I missed you.”

Those words came as a relief to Jungkook, who now had a small smile graced on his lips, “You are so important to me.” It was the most random afterthought.

Your eyes welled up at that. It wasn’t supposed to happen this early on?#&!@

“That feels good to hear.” You respond weakly. “But, I have so much to tell you. Ask you. But, mostly tell you.” You pause, “I want you to be prepared to take everything in.”

“I promise you, I’m here. I’m with you.” Jungkook extends his hand for you to hold.  

You restart your sentence thrice before getting a hang of what you’ve half heartedly rehearsed.

“It’s a shame I don’t have a cocktail in my hand right now,” you nervously laugh.

Jungkook playfully scoffs, “Can I sit with you?” You pause, “No, I haven’t showered yet.” “That’s okay.”

You smile at the ground. “I have to start with, like, my upbringing, my family life, relationship- whatever.”

Jungkook tilts his head forward to indicate he was attentive.

“I haven’t had the best role models as a child. I’m lacking in many ways and I doubt I will ever feel completely confident in myself, at least for now. And none of this is-“ You find an object or something, anything to focus on. To compose yourself. Jungkook’s finger tattoos. His hands distract you for a second before you get back on track. “It’s not your fault. And it’s not your responsibility to make me confident. I know, I’m the only one who can change that.”

You can see it on his face that he disagrees with something you said but the floor is yours at the moment. He respects it.

“So, I’ve never really had anyone tell me that I’m doing okay? I swear I can explain this better...“ You scoff to yourself.

“Don’t worry.” Jungkook reassures you. “You’re good.”

Jungkook contemplates whether or not to ask to sit closer to you. He shook his head and let you lead him instead.

“Wow, I hate being this vulnerable. Ahh….” You pause for only a second or two, not wanting to break your flow.

“I have never been sure about anything in my life, stuff most people would find easy to, uh, operate through. I didn’t know where I’d be now a year ago, I could never plan for anything. I don’t have plans. I don’t have a goal or a dream. And, I didn’t know if that was… normal or okay.”

“You know? Things like, do I want to study more or take a break? What am I good at? What can I do that would help me in any way in life? How do I, I don’t know, grow a backbone…? Am I even stable enough to bring another person into my life?”

“Just the usual stuff.” Jungkook interrupts.

You smile a little, “Sure.”

“Up until I started therapy with this really great psychiatrist. Min Yoongi. That’s his name,” You looked up at Jungkook, feeling your lower lip quiver, “And he- I think, I mean I know this is incredibly weird but he has taught me a lot more in months than my parents have in years.” You squeeze your eyes shut.

You try not to let it affect you but fail. It’s a reaction you’re far too familiar with when you mention or even think of your parents. Even in passing.

A sob escapes your lips. “I feel guilty for talking about them this way. They have given me everything they could. I’m not ungrateful. I don’t want you to think I-”

“_____, I understand what you mean. Nothing you say right now will change my feelings for you.” Jungkook attempts to comfort you.

He was lucky enough to have the privilege of being paid attention to and loved. He knows this very well.

Besides, he wouldn’t dare make assumptions about you even if you kicked a child in their face.

You chew on your inner cheek to stop yourself from breaking down, “I respect my parents as people. I really, really do but I can’t go back to them. I can never do anything right for them and they’ve ruined possibly every future relationship of mine- any kind of relationship- I can’t trust people. It has held me back so many times…”

Jungkook switches his place from the little chair to kneeling on the floor next to your bed. Placing your hands in his, he kisses your forehead.

That simple action does it for you.

It’s like a dam breaking open when you finally give into him.

Your nose is warm, probably red and leaky and your cheeks are wet from the tears. His hands squeeze yours tighter than ever. “It’s okay,” he mumbles over and over.

You gently pull away from him. It has barely been a few, ten to fifteen minutes since he got here and you find yourself getting exasperated--- exasperated at yourself, at your inability to stay stable, to come up with non-nonsensical sentences and at the inability to make a decision for yourself.  

You give yourself a minute to breathe. You’re so tired you want to fall back on your bed and go to bed already but you refrain.

Jungkook’s instincts had kicked in.

He’s confronted with a social situation where he’d usually be panicked and confused. But for some reason, he was able to calmly steer through it.

When it suddenly dawned on him; Jungkook wasn’t being his usual defensive self, he didn’t feel cornered by you.

Not like you blamed him at all, he naturally went into ‘dad mode’--- in the most non-creepy way possible. Actually, ditch that metaphor, let’s settle with ‘boyfriend mode’ instead.

He snaps out of his thoughts when you sigh.

“Jungkook, I like you. I can’t help but feel… not enough- inadequate for you. You deserve way better than some childish, stubborn, stupid girl, but I like you so much I can’t navigate--- anything.”

“_____, I wish you could see how perfect you are to me.” He pouts.

“But, I’m not!” You digress.

Grabbing on to his shirt, you sob harder into his chest, “And don’t say things like that.”

“Why not? I really, really like you, _____.”

“Stop it. I’ve hidden so much from you.”

He envelopes your tired body with his sturdy arms. It almost energizes you. He has such strong effects on you.

“Well, it isn’t on purpose that it turned out to be this way. It’s your own defence mechanism, I get that.” Jungkook pulls away from you and grabs your face in his hands, forcing you to stare directly into his eyes, “I know you won’t accept it but none of this, anything, is your fault.” He pauses, “I mean it.”

“But, that’s not everything---”

He squishes your face as if to silence you.

“I’m here until you ask me to leave.” He doesn't stop there. “And even if you were keeping these feelings inside you on purpose, I would never- and I mean never, ever blame you for whatever.” He adds.

You secretly wished he would stop being so lenient.

One would argue that it’s the bare minimum but you still think he’s too good for you. It’s just something you aren’t used to.

Yuna’s involvement has not been discussed yet and you’re dreading bringing it up. You don’t know how he would react to her even though it seems to be going well at the moment. The build up to this moment finally ends.

“I appreciate that,” you whisper. “It’s a work in progress.”

You sit in silence for a few seconds. It isn’t awkward. It’s just weirdly serene and cathartic. The moment is possibly about to be disrupted though.

While you contemplate the beginning of your next snag, Jungkook thinks of telling you about Yuna. He hopes you won’t take it too hard.

“Before you say anything, I know how much she means to you and I’d never ask you to choose between us, ever. I can see that bond you have. I know we probably won’t see eye to eye on this.”

You focus on him, “Yuna does NOT like me. At all. I have accepted it, you should too.”

“Hear me out, before you counter attack--- I have learnt to be okay with Yuna, well… it is still a work in process, but it’s still happening! And I understand that she's your best friend!” You exclaim, low-key convincing yourself of it.

“Hey, give me some credit here.” Jungkook whines. “She came over the other day, I sent her away.”

You visibly freeze.

Things had slowly started piecing themselves together in Jungkook’s head. And, oh, how incredibly stupid he felt. The look on your face says it all. He understands that you weren’t expectant of him to do anything about the ‘Yuna situation’. It embarrasses him.

“What happened? Did she say something?”

“Oh, yeah, she said a whole lot. She even dressed like you,” Jungkook laughed. “It was crazy.”

Crazy? :(

“Crazy? Why?” You sadly ask.

“NO! NOt because of the- ok, no, wait.” He gulps, “She had like a floral dress on and she did her makeup like you do yours. And you usually have the glossy lip thing going on, I know because I love getting it all over me,” Jungkook scrunches his face in false bliss, clutching his chest.

You stare at him in astonishment with your mouth dropped open a little. Then you shook your head.

“Tell me what happened.”

“Right, I guess she came to do what you wouldn’t.”

You blink owlishly. You don’t know what this means.

Why was he being so cryptic?

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to sound cryptic, she just… showed me this other side of her that I didn’t know existed. Or, didn’t realise existed, I don’t know.”

That was so freakish, you didn’t even say that out loud. You sigh at him.

“Jungkook, I’m having trouble understanding you,” you rub your eyes roughly to wake yourself.

“She wanted me to break up with you. It… was this whole thing. She spoke of you terribly. She wanted me to choose between you and her.” He smiled humourlessly, “Obviously, I had to shut her up so I asked her to leave. Kindly.”

“Kindly?” You repeat, confused. It’s a weird detail. “Yeah, I mean- I made her leave. I haven’t spoken to her ever since.”

Your expression dulls, “Jungkook, when was this?” “A while ago. It was the day you texted me about tomorrow’s date.” You cannot read his expressions. You don’t know what to feel. He looks determined but then-

You gently raise your hand and bring it to his face and wipe a stray tear on his face.

“I’m sorry, hon. Why didn’t you tell me this sooner?”

“It felt wrong. I understood she was part of the reason you and I fought. I should’ve sent her away that day when she yelled at you.”

“You gave her the benefit of doubt. She’s your closest friend. I understand the issue- reluctancy, I mean.” You reason. “I’m sorry it turned out like this.”

“Hey, this is not on you, not one bit.” Jungkook shook his head.

You accept it, but still argue, “Yeah, I mean if I had told you about it before… I don’t know. I’m just sorry. Have you tried talking to her?”

“No. I didn’t want to,” He sighed, “Not until I’ve talked to you about it. I need to get my shit straight.”

“It’s great timing too.” You allude to his finals, sarcastically.

“Pfft, she sure does have her way of revenge.”

"She who?" You tilt your head in confusion.

"The time." He says it like it was the most normal reference ever.

“The time is a woman?” You pout.

“Of course. Like God. God is a woman, didn’t you know?” His banter lightens the mood by a small percent.

“But, really. Have you been well? I don’t imagine a fight as big as this to have no effect on you…” You trail.

He smiles cutely, “I’m a strong boy.”

“Besides, I only found myself worrying about you rather than Yuna. She scared me a little.” He adds.

You blush at his confession. “I’m sorry,” you grumble.

“Don’t be!” Jungkook startles you, “I like thinking of you.”

You shy away from his gaze.

Jungkook is trying to bring his pathetic self to properly address his role in this whole debacle. He lightly massages your thigh, unconsciously inching his high higher up. The presumed dead butterflies in your belly began to revive ragefully.

In all honesty, he’s afraid of losing you. He doesn’t want this to go badly.

“_____. Seriously, though. I ignored all the horrible things she said to you.”

“You didn’t!” You squeak. Because of both his statement and his hand nearing your centre.

He abruptly places his hand back on his lap, not noticing your embarrassment, “No. I need you to know that I was in the wrong here. Me and Yuna.”

“Jungkook, no. You- she’s your friend for a much longer time than me. I think it gives her more credibility than me. I mean, I wouldn’t have noticed either. I don’t blame you. Please.” You breathe out. “I’m sorry I walked out so suddenly during dinner that day, before your study break. It really set the tone for the weeks that followed.”

Jungkook's jaw clenched, “No, you don’t have to be sorry. I made it uncomfortable for you.”

“It was mostly her.” You point.

“Mostly!” He catches on making you cringe, “You don’t have to sugar-coat for me, doll. I want you to be comfortable enough with me to tell me I fucked up.”

He had mistaken your reluctancy for nonchalance and security when it was the stark opposite.

He really, really, screwed up.

He knows you’d never blame him because you’re the sweetest girl in the world but he wasn’t beneath taking responsibility for what he did.

“Really. I don’t blame you. She kinda called me boring and a drag or whatever on your trip and you agreed so it hurt me a little more than I- I don’t know. It’s in the past!”

His eyes widen in horror, “_____, I’m so sorry. I had no idea she- I agreed?” - “I- yeah. Like, when I begged to tag along, she had said I’d bore you or something? I don’t remember. It’s okay, Jungkook.” You try to change the topic.

“_____, I’m so fucking sorry, I definitely heard her wrong! You aren’t boring! I thought the trip would bore you! Or overwhelm you, my friends are obnoxious for people who don’t know them, that’s all. I promise.” He tucked a few stray hairs from your face behind your ears.

“I know that now.” You press your lips together, making your cheeks stick further out. “_____.”

He lowly whispers, “You’re my favourite girl.”

“You’re my favourite boy.” You look up at the origami hearts dangling from the ceiling, “Although, Taehyung isn’t that far behind.”

Jungkook’s mouth opens and shuts almost instantly. You grin and squeeze his hand in yours.

“Ow. Nails…” Jungkook softly whimpers. You giggle at him, smoothening his palm out, “Sorry.” “Yeah? Kiss it better.” He demands.

You pretend to think, “Hm…. Maybe tomorrow.”

“_____!” Jungkook whined harder, “That’s unfair, I haven’t even hugged you for weeks. Did you know I had to get by hugging Taehyung instead? He always smells like lilies and sandalwood; I’m used to your vanilla and peach!”

“Lilies and sandalwood?” You quiz, genuinely interested. Jungkook suddenly clears his throat, getting off the floor.

“I’m going to spend the night.” He side tracked.

You blush, “Sana would never allow it.”

“Pfft, she helped me set this up, doll.” Jungkook cockily stretches his arms over his head. She did?

Oh? Oh. Oh, no wonder she tried to push you to shower.

“_____.”

You look up at Jungkook who intensely gazed at you. “Yeah…” You whisper.

“Are we better now?” His voice is tainted with uncertainty. You can see fear and slight sadness on his face.

You know he’s still mourning his best friend.

He doesn’t show it out of respect for you but you make sure to remember to bring it up later. You’d hate for him to go through this alone.

“We’re much better now.” You hold his hand.

You never wanted him to come to this. There’s a fleeting thought of breaking up with him so he wouldn’t have to lose such a huge part of his life.

Somewhere, you felt at fault for everything that happened.

If you didn’t exist for him, he would never have to choose. On the other hand, you’re glad he chose you. But you can’t help but wonder what could’ve happened had Yuna been nicer. It’s your insecurity and trust issues speaking again.

And, who’s to say he would really go back to Yuna? You could be taking away his happiness regardless. You make note of the not very subtle self-depreciative thoughts.

You stand up and look up at him towering over you more prominently, “Stop,” you giggle.

“What?” He smirks.

You whine a little, “You’re doing that alpha male thing!” To which he takes great offence. His brows scrunch.

“WHO taught you that word? Taehyung? It was him, wasn’t it? Ahh, what is he doing making my girlfriend laugh?” He exasperates, mumbling off some ineligible words.

He puts his arms around your body and squeezes you close to him, “Don’t ever leave me like that. Except if you want to, I will not invade you. You know that, right?” He backtracks and reassures you.

You swore you heard a shiver in his voice. “I know.” You promise.

Jungkook sweetly smiles at you making you a little aware and conscious about the way you looked at the moment.

You hoped he didn’t focus on your dark circles too much, or at all.

Jungkook cuts your thoughts off by leaning down to kiss your ear. It tickles. Goosebumps litter your skin.

Jungkook sloppily leaves wet kisses up and down your jaw and neck. His hands caressed your waist. He knows it tickles you. You press yourself harder against him, not knowing what to do to soothe yourself.

Jungkook kisses the top of your breasts through the open collar of your dress. You gasp and clench your toes.

He moans like it’s the best thing he ever put his lips on. Jungkook rubs his face in between them and bites and sucks on your semi hardened nipples through your dress.

He groans about how much he missed feeling your tits while your heavy breathing turns into wanton moans.

He takes his sweet time, dragging his wet tongue around your nipples one at a time, giving them both an equal amount of love, before reluctantly pulling away.

You’re eager for him to just pull your dress down and suck on your bare tits.

But then, you hear an annoyingly loud ringing sound.

“Argh, fuck. Whose is that?” Jungkook rasps.

“It’s coming from your phone.” You complain.

“Oh,” Jungkook deeply sighs and let’s his arms drop from around you to find the source of the ringing.

“Fuck,” Jungkook cusses when he spots his phone. You nervously frown, “What happened?”

“Study group. Shit, I didn’t realise that was today.” He shows you his alarm reminder titled ‘STUDY GROUP REMINDER CALL’ in all caps and everything.

Not even a second later, you see the name ‘Jia’ along with a photo of a very gorgeous girl flash on his screen.

“Jia?” You pout. Jungkook stares at you for a second, then at his screen, “AND Chris and Yugyeom and Karina! Study group!” He quickly adds.

You giggle, “You should answer that.”

“Hm? Nnnghh, I’ll catch up tomorrow.” He opts.

“JK, no. Study group comes first. You have people depending on you.”

Also, you really want to shower and shave for him.

“Brat.” He throws at you, playfully sizing you up, looking you up and down.

“That’s YOU!” You scoff.

He licks your cheek, childishly, “I miss my shy baby.”

“Shut upughh, bye.” You blush, pushing him away from you.

He hates how right you are about the study group and kisses your lips briefly before answering his friend’s call while simultaneously setting up his laptop and notebooks on your table.

He wastes no time joining their group call.

And now, you’re left with two funny-looking wet spots on your tits.

[starspann]

wouldn’t it be nice (pt. 2) | 18+

joe cooper x reader

fem!reader, she/her pronouns are used

★☆✵☆★

warnings: cursing, smut

coop ruins everything

★☆✵☆★

weirdly enough, the blonde had been keeping calendar.

exactly 4 months and 8 days.

that’s how long cooper had been battling the urge to confess his feelings to remer’s girlfriend.

to be even more precise, he’s been wanting to for as long as the lovely couple had been together.

sometimes he’d practice his confession in the shower. while lazily shampooing his hair, he’d talk to the tiled wall, and somehow still manage to become embarrassed. he’d muster up a few broken phrases before falling silent.

“what a fucking wimp.” he told himself. he couldn’t even tell her in an imaginary scenario, how could he grow the balls to tell it to her face?

he’d shake his head, disappointed in himself.

then the soapy suds from his hair would fall and slide into his eye, he’d scream and almost slip on the slick bathtub floor.

not only did he lack the courage, but she’s dating sir fucking swish. doug remer, joe coopers best friend since they were little kids. they did everything together. used to read comic books together, ride bikes together… now, they drink together. a lot.

coop and remer found themselves seated at what could only be described as a seedy bar, like so many other nights they had spent together. and just like every other night, remer felt compelled to talk about y/n.

“hey man, we should get out of here soon. y'know, since y/n's coming over tonight." he opened his wallet to reveal a condom.

cooper let out an internal groan, feeling both embarrassed and annoyed at the same time.

"yeah, yeah i’ll follow you," he sighed exasperatedly as remer pushed off the stool and slowly made his way towards the door of the bar.

as cooper stood there, watching remer walk away, a flash of light on the dirty bar floor caught his eye.

it appeared to be a small, square-shaped, laminated paper laying next to his feet.

figuring it slipped from remer’s wallet when he opened it, he Immediately stooped down and swept it up, ready to call out for his friend, but before he could even get one word out, cooper turned the piece of paper around with curiosity.

his heart beat quickened and his cock twitched at the image.

a hazy, half-assed taken polaroid photo of y/n, stripped bare and invitingly curled up on remers bed.

though it was a little blurry, he could still admire all the details. her fists gripping onto remer’s baby blue sheets that he always refused to change, her eyes gently shut, her mouth hanging slightly open, and worst of all, remers hand placed on her thigh, his hips snapping into hers.

the picture was obviously taken mid-fuck.

cooper face flushed hot. it was like an instant dream come true; he had admired her from afar for so long yet never had the courage to act upon it. now here she was, willingly on display right before his eyes.

instead of doing the right thing, and being a respectable human being; he stuffed the photo in his back pocket, following remer to the old car.

coop’s dick strained against his jeans the entire car ride.

back at the house, y/n cursed at her curly haired boyfriend for losing such a thing.

“jesus fucking christ, doug! one thing i ask you to do, one thing!” she smacked him on the arm, furious with his careless actions.

“i told you not to put it in a place that you’d forget about!” her arms were crossed as she angrily paced around his unkempt room.

“hey, okay, first of all, i didn’t forget where i put it, it must’ve slipped out is all!” he threw his hands up in defense as if being accused of a crime.

“holy shit.” her breath was no longer steady, in fact, it sounded like she was on the brink of tears.

any girl would be if they had just learned their boyfriend lost a naked picture of them, most likely in a public space.

“y/n, baby, relax! it’s somewhere, okay? i’ll find it.” he held his pinkie up, awaiting y/n to hook hers with his, “just trust me?”

a promise, again. exactly like how he promised her he wouldn’t lose the photo in the first place.

“..okay.” y/n gave in, lifting her hand towards his and pinkie swearing to another false vow.

remer smiled at her with a toothy grin.

“see? that’s more like it.” he stood up from the bed and patted her on the back, “i’ll find it. swear.”

in the room next to theirs, coop was slumped, perched on his bed with his head in his hands. he was staring down at the tattered polaroid grasped tightly in his palms, considering what he should do with it. he could chuck it away, but what would be the point of disposing a perfectly good photo? a sexy one of his crush at that?

he quickly placed it on the side table next to him. avoiding its gaze, he shook his head, disgusted with his own actions.

without a doubt it was wrong. so fucking wrong.

he knew it, too.

despite his unease at the moment, that did not stop his hand from reaching for the lewd polaroid and feverishly pulling down his pants.

he felt an overwhelming sense of guilt as he considered how wrong it seemed for him to give in to such temptation, but yet here he was, desperately trying to satisfy his untameable urges.

he collapsed back onto his bed, the springs inside the mattress making an irritating squeak as he threw his boxers off, kicking them to the side.

he was already pretty hard, the view of polaroid only causing his cock to throb even more.

he laid his head against a pillow and began to work on himself, nothing but y/n on his mind.

he pictured her on his bed, her legs spread for him, her body inviting him to join her.

the movement of his hand sped up.

he’d make her feel so, so good. god, if he only had the chance, he’d spend hours between her legs. till her eyes rolled back. till she forgot remer’s name. eat her out like she was his last meal and he was a terribly starved inmate on death row.

he thought about what she might say,

“fuck me, coop. need you so bad. need your cock inside me.”

“you’re tongue feels fucking great right there, keep going.”

“sh-shit coop—“

he pictured her stuttering through her moans, unable to contain the pleasure he would give her.

his finger glided over his tip, playing with the pre-cum forming at his slit.

he looked at the picture once more, hand shaking and unable to keep steady as the other one stroked himself.

his hips bucked into his fist, pulling a noisy whine from his throat.

he was practically mesmerized by the image.

he really couldn’t help it. her name just rolled off his lips so easily,

“shit, y/n.” he groaned.

loudly.

it really wasn’t his fault. he had no idea that remer and y/n were still in the house at the time. in his mind, he thought they went out. he was far too busy imagining hot, wild sex with her to hear them arguing next door.

he moaned her name over and over again.

that’s when y/n opened his door.

of course, coop had forgotten to lock it.

why wouldn’t he?

[charmedreincarnation]

How do I get rid of my past beliefs? I have been trying so hard to manifest but I feel like when I try I get scared and feel like I'm doing something wrong. Is anything truly possible? Is this real? How can I know that this isn't something that is bad for me or isbt true? I come from a very religious conservative household so such things like this are considered dark and evil in my household. I fear they are right. I have very connecting beliefs on this because I feel like I'm supposed to manifest but there are some negative thoughts that make me feel like I'm doing something wrong. Can you help me?

we do not need to directly change in reality, but only need to imagine the desired outcome in order to manifest it.

Reality is what we observe and experience on earth, the physical world in which we live and have physical bodies. Imagination, on the other hand, is the creative energy that is available to us in our minds, free from physical boundary. Now imagine a scenario. Let say that your current reality has you feeling down and unmotivated. You decide that you want to change your life and start feeling more positive and optimistic. According to Goddard's teaching to whom I follow, you should focus on your desired outcome in your mind and imagine it as if it has already happened, as opposed to trying to directly change your reality through physical actions. By visualizing what you want and placing yourself in that imaginary reality, you are creating a vibration of energy that will eventually become your reality.

Goddard explains that this process is a lot like playing a movie in our minds; we should make sure we focus on the desired outcome and be sure to pay attention to every detail, from the sights to the sounds, from the feelings to the emotions, and from the things people say to the reactions they have.

This method works so well because it helps us focus our energy on something specific and direct it towards an outcome or goal. Our imaginations hold unlimited potential, so if we can learn to control what we are imagining and use positive affirmations, then anything is possible.

One of Neville’s most important quotes states, “You are not changing ‘3D’, but you are changing your awareness of your identity within 3D.” To understand what this means, some context on ‘3D’ is necessary. The phrase ‘3D’ is used by metaphysical philosophers to refer to the three-dimensional world – the physical material world. This world is shaped by our collective mental environment, beliefs, and laws.

When Neville says that we are not changing 3D, he means that many of the physical and material aspects of our lives may remain unaltered – our job, location, family structure, etc. – but by changing our beliefs, mental environment and awareness, we can create a completely new version of ourselves within the same 3D experience. Therefore, our imaginations are the only thing that matters when it comes to transforming ourselves; we can choose to see ourselves in a new light, no matter what life circumstances have shaped our present reality.

By visualizing and believing that we are in a new light, we open ourselves up to receive new experiences that align with our new self-concept. It has nothing with changing the past, or denying what you’re experiencing as of now, only changing self. the art of self-transformation is about giving energy and focus to what you want to become, rather than expending energy trying to change external circumstances. i would suggest visualizing the results you want to experience, and believing it is already yours in the present moment.

[cliozaur]

“Marius had preserved the religious habits of his childhood.” I interpret this as evidence that his aunt had a much greater influence on him than it may have initially seemed. Two chapters prior, we were told that  “When he emerged from the hands of Aunt Gillenormand, his grandfather confided him to a worthy professor of the most purely classic innocence.” This indicates that until a certain age (usually until the age of 7, when boys were typically under their mother's or another female relative's care), Marius was under the care of his aunt. I imagine there must have been a bond between them, but Hugo never cares to tell us about it. And we know that his aunt belonged to a religious society, so it was she who instilled Marius with these "religious habits" that led him to attend mass at Saint-Sulpice, where he was meant to meet M. Mabeuf (we remember that his grandfather was a non-believer).

Regarding the revelation in the church, it's hard to perceive it without sarcasm. Marius literary wasn’t interested, didn’t ask. He clearly stated, “There is no need of that, Sir.” However, as a result, he ended up with a story filled with tiny details that would ultimately change his life.

His dialogue with M. Gillenormand is amusing. “I have arranged a hunting-party with some friends” – each phrase in this sentence is a surprise. Marius knows how to hunt? Marius has friends with whom he could potentially go hunting? Is there so much about Marius that we do not know? Or is he inventing imaginary friends and hunting scenarios just in case he needs to lie to his grandfather? And it comes as no surprise that M. Gillenormand jumps to the conclusion, "Some love affair!" – what else could it be for this overly amorous old man.

[fitzrove]

pink and white 🩷🤍

🩷 Pink: Do you find a certain character (or characters) easy to write? More difficult -- and if so, do you avoid writing that character (or those characters) when possible?

I have this whole thing where most of my POV characters, in fanfic, are similar to each other - ie. some flavour of "emotionally suffering repressed young man"... 😭😅😅 So I definitely don't go out of my away to avoid it, and it does come pretty naturally to me at this point. Sometimes I worry about "fandom brain" taking over, ie. my takes on the character/s becoming too out-of-character. I really don't like reading extremely out-of-character stuff, to me being in character to an acceptable extent (but tbh that varies for everyone) is usually important in fanfic because it's what people (at least me) are looking for to be emotionally fulfilled while reading yknow.

My writing process is also very instinctual (it's like that for academic writing too), I will just start writing and try to combine what I think the character would do and say with what I know about the source material and possible additional context. So yeah, sometimes I actually start worrying that this is having an influence on and giving some level of bias to my work... but oh well, people seem to like it and I always try to improve 😂😅

🤍 White: What's a fanfic scenario or idea you'd like someone else to write so that you can read it?

Omg there's literally so many... One I'm thinking of is an affaire/elisabeth AU where Rudolf and Taaffe are childhood friends instead of Taaffe and FJ and they have this whole complicated antagonistic yet also deeply personal (not an innuendo) relationship going on. Someone told me they were working on one and I'm waiting with great anticipation... (😂😂😂 this is a targeted vaguepost)

On another note - always a [redacted] for canon divergent (ish) genderbent wlw todolf 😭 it's so niche but if done well it can be really good. Ooh and I've been thinking about how fun it would be to have something that tries to unpack stuff from Rudolf's historical context while also being todolf fic akslpdpf, like this whole expectation of strength and military masculinity that he actually worked hard to fulfill (he was a military officer actively serving in a regiment for some years and was very loyal to his men - to some extent the way he was raised worked, but it also led to anxiety when he couldn't measure up, I remember Hamann detailing an incident where his horse ran amok while inspecting the ranks and it was very embarrassing for a young general like him) OR like i once said in a post, the deep disconnect between supernatural imaginary boyfriend and rudolf's belief in science over superstition akdkdk

Also, just straight up any kind of (canon era) todolf fanfic in general, I am starving,,, 😂

[lookwhatilost]

is anyone here old and online enough to remember the final fantasy vii house? if you don’t, rewind to the turn of the century, 20 odd years back. i haven’t brushed up on the details, but i’ll give you a general synopsis.

so, this 19 y/o with a troubled home life – i think they were trans, which i only bring up to give some context as to how someone might stuck end up in a situation like this, because they need support wherever they can find it – ends up meeting some people at a con who are really into cosplay and really into final fantasy vii, jrpgs, anime, amongst other 90s turn of the millennium stuff, and ends up living with this deeply troubled lesbian couple, and some orbiters that come and go. “kinnies” wasn’t really a term around at the time, but that’s probably the closest description to what they were. “there’s this parallel universe, not one that’s just alternate potentialities of our world, but anything you can think of or imagine or conceptualize is spawning into a reality in and of itself. therefore, you can have these spiritual soul bonds with fictional characters. you are them, and they are you, and you have a dimensional link to this character from a video game that was written by a japanese guy who worked 80 hours a week” they all engage in this to varying degrees, but the person at the center of this did so the most strongly. they really sincerely believed this and it was this nightmare situation of this one central individual doing weird torture rituals to people. like putting them into ice water baths and stuff to try and bring forth their connections to these characters... but at the same time, making everyone else pay the bills and do the housework and everything. a proto cult. the initial kid who moved in with them gets out of this situation eventually and issues a warning to the ffvii fandom.

if you google final fantasy vii house, you’ll find videos and summaries. the original callout page is still up and down the rabbit hole did an episode about it.

that basic idea that “all the movies you love exist in a parallel universe that exists unto itself and can interact with ours” is something i’ve seen fiction that touches on it. wishbone goes into the book and becomes one of the characters. anybody remember wishbone? or the never-ending story. those were most of my imaginary kid scenarios when i was a kid playing in my back yard. some iteration of me interacting with all my favorite characters. it’s kind of... a stunted, juvenile mindset. but there are some people who don’t grow up and who are so, well, mentally ill that the intersection of these things makes their filter for reality so busted. they’re so emotionally connected to whatever fictions they escape into that they turn this into a cosmology that they really, sincerely believe in. and as the internet coalesces and comes into being, scattered individuals that have taken the ball and run with it on these fictional contrivances interact with each other and reenforce one another’s delusions. the story of tumblr dot com.

chris-chan is another huge example of this. if you look at the early chris-chan lore, like making billy mays the mayor of cwcville, which is something she was really upset about initially. that limitless capacity to make yourself believe whatever you want to believe, regardless of the external world. pure solipsism. the world is what i make it and i live entirely in my delusion. the same cosmology: all the fiction i love is real, and i can really meet those characters. ezra miller’s cult thing seems like it’s also hitting the same beats

as more and more people get online and grow up in a media-saturated environment, and as corporations embrace the multiverse concept as a way to have, like, 8 different versions of spider-man for every demographic and have them meet, i think this is going to become more a cosmology or ideology that gets built into new-age cults, etc. not to be super doom & gloom, because this is going to be an insane crank belief in the same way that if you went back 50 years, there were plenty of other insane crank beliefs. but i think this is going to be the new dominant one because, absent anything else to get invested in, absent a world of class consciousness or meaningful political movements, but post the atomic bomb, it’s kind of hard to have conventional religious beliefs.

even the people i know who are converting to catholicism, there’s a kind of post-modern self-awareness that is different from the sincere un self-reflective faith that would have constituted most people’s engagement with religion, like, 500 years ago. it has the same pieces of all the other new age stuff that gained prominence in the decades post wwii. it’s a search for something that fills a spiritual and social void, but can square with a reality where personal religious belief no longer seems tenable.

“what am i emotionally connected with?” i don’t know, sonic the hedgehog. or the flash . or kylo ren. or whoever. it’s so desperate to satisfy that emotional connection with those characters and their worlds, you convince yourself there’s some way to actually spiritually, mentally, even physically connect with them. that they are more than just fiction.

we’re gonna keep seeing more and more of this kinda shit. this is just the beginning.

and the core person behind the final fantasy house is still out there to this day.

[jisungswhore]

Last Night| Bang Chan

A/N: I’m new to posting on here, I’m still figuring it out so please bear with me thank youuuu.

*gif not mine credit to rightful owner*

JUST A PREVIEW! STORY SOON TO COME

Disclaimer: None of the scenarios in this story are true, it is just fictional and imaginary.

Warnings: Mentions of sex, hickeys, alcohol..more to be added when finished

⚠️MINORS DNI⚠️

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was late at night and you were surrounded by color changing lights, loud music, and had a 5th shot in your hand. Your eyes wandered around the bar again hoping the view had changed from just a few seconds ago, but against your wishes it was still couples dancing, kissing, and grinding on each other. Ugh…Valentines.

You hoped the bar would be filled with single people drowning their sorrows in alcohol just like you. Well being wrong was definitely an understatement.

“You drinking the pain away too?” You looked over and happened to see a familiar face. Chris. You hadn’t seen him since high school forensics class, now here you were at age 24 seeing him in a bar. Crazy world isn’t it?

“Yeah” you laughed seeing he was doing the same “disappointed to see all the couples?” He nodded in agreement.

————

The next morning you woke up in an unfamiliar room with nothing but a blanket over your body and the sun in your face. There was no recollection or a single thought in your mind until a heavy arm fell over your waist. “Fuck.”

You carefully moved his arm off of you “was he always this buff???” and quickly put your clothes on and gathered your belongings leaving the nice apartment and waited outside for your best friend to come to the rescue and pick you up.

“CHRISTOPHER?????” Soyeon couldn’t be any louder.

“Yes now don’t be so loud Soyeon!” You covered her mouth and tried your best to hide your face but half of the cafe was already facing the two of you.

“I’m sorry y/n I just cannot believe you ended up sleeping with someone from high school and Christopher of all people!!” Soyeon couldn’t seem to wrap her head around the fact that you found someone you had a slight crush on your senior year.

Slight crush. Yes it was just a small crush, it only lasted a month. Christopher was the friendly guy in school, he wasn’t popular or anything, he just happened to like having conversations with people whenever he got the chance. He was sweet, caring, and always remembered the small details. How? Nobody knew but you found it admiring. After high school you had lost contact with most people except for Soyeon.

“How did it even happen?”

“I have no clue” From what you remembered you were catching up with him after your initial greetings, he bought you a drink, you bought him one in return and from then on you couldn’t remember anything. “I had already taken 5 shots when we started talking and next thing I knew I woke up in his bed” you put your face in your hands, how could you have been so foolish? You couldn’t even remember talking with him much less sleeping with him.

On the other hand, Chris woke up cold. He turned around and saw you were gone, the only thing left behind were the scratches on his back and hickeys on his neck. Those would be there for a while. Even with everything that he drank, he could still remember quite a bit. The way you stripped his clothes off, the way your soft lips seemed to be chained to his neck and chest, he could still feel your fingertips roam around his body and your nails dig into his back as your legs and sheets were intertwined with his.

He sat up and sighed, there was a little part of him hoping to wake up next to you. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t heartbroken when he didn’t even see a note, but what else could he expect from a one night stand?

——————

You hadn’t seen Chan since that day, well of course you didn’t, you had been working your ass off. Not only had you taken too many shots, but while blacked out you also splurged on a few Amazon deliveries you have surprisingly received through out the week. You need to make up the money so here you were sitting at your boring plain desk filling out paperwork for what felt like the 500th time today.

“Y/N can you upload this into the correct file when you’re done please” Great. More work hooray! At least your boss asked nicely.

Once you finished your tasks you took your lunch break. A whole hour to yourself and you were happy about it…until your thoughts started drifting off. Since that night you slowly started remembering what had happened between you and your former classmate. You remembered how soft the skin of his neck felt against your lips, how gentle his initial touch was while undressing you, how his fingertips burned your thighs as they made their way up your body, how he would place his lips on yours like a gentleman while his hips rammed into you with desperation, almost as if it was his first time. Was it his first time? No he wouldn’t. There’s no way the boy had lost his virginity to you on a one night stand…right? And there’s no way a virgin could be so good at sex. At least that’s what you thought. The alarm on your phone rang bringing you back to reality and signaling there was only 15 minutes left of your lunch. You finished up and went back to your desk. Here we go again.

~~~~~~~~

I hope this is good, the full thing will be uploaded June 30th!

[deathblizzard]

“i’m not mad.” ((desk-work-expert/Nanao))

@desk-work-expert

“You say that, but clearly you’d much rather I accept the position already.” She frowns, the topic already draining her energy. She truly tries to take the idea up in her mind once more on the push to do so. But it’s the image of the white cloak on her arms that makes her shake her head, ejecting from the imaginary scenario within seconds. Upon return she finds her hand balled into a tight fist. It seems she will still need to keep her foot down on the matter. The idea has been approached before, at least in her head, enough that she’s at least comfortable in navigating through her reasons of refusal. 

Rukia sighs, guessing ahead any reason provided to try and change her mind. “I know it would make things easier if I took it up already. If I felt like it would be the right time I would have done it already.” Sometimes she questions if the efforts she makes to put off taking captaincy and the pressure others give her is worth the holding off. But it's something in her gut that denies it. Not an outright denial but something that says too soon, like a timer not yet gone off. She feels like there should be a feeling associated with taking it up, not an obligation and a duty to do so and not just because its been left to her. 

There’s emotions still raging, still grieving within her, still finding herself looking up at nothing, instead of looking down that hasn’t changed. Coming to peace with loss has never come to her quickly, if it did, she was lying to herself. She can’t help but wonder if these were feelings her own captain dug through when it came time to deal with his own vacancies of his division. But perhaps her still thinking of it as his division is just another sign that she hasn’t made the transition yet. “Acting captain will do me a while longer.” She declares coldly. Still, she doesn’t quite feel like she’s settled the manner. The bridge of her finger rises to her chin as Rukia wonders how she could convey herself better on the matter. “Honestly, it’s not so much the duties as much as... everything else.” Her words are likely obvious, considering she currently takes up most jobs of a captain already without complaint. But it's the title: which just feels broken and incorrect to her, the cloak: one tailored by her old captain’s thoughtfulness but bearing ever more the weight and responsibility, a new old office: waiting to be dug through and items and notes to refresh the sting of and make herself content with, the power: which still feels very much like a starving beast that she hasn’t given it’s meal; each hold something deeper and remain on her mental list. All of which she’s unable to give detail on and are the reasons of her hesitation.

“I’ll get there.” She conveys, feeling some kind of confident that it’s still a realistic goal. “The thirteenth is...” Rukia thinks, cutting off her thought, her mouth opening but pausing, still trying to retain her honesty. They have a lack of soldiers, many quitting, retiring, or dead altogether. The division is still in such a destructive state, but the first word that comes to Rukia’s mind is that it has a ever choking feeling of emptiness. “It’s managing as much as anywhere else surely.” 

She wants to listen to some words from her fellow officer, noting that she doesn’t quite giving herself the time to tackle that list and it hasn’t budged in anyway. She sighs once more, taking a step on the matter though she is far from smiling while doing so. “Fine. Next time, feel free to try calling me Kuchiki-taichou and I’ll see how I feel on it.“ Just trying to advocate that matter brings a red hue to her cheek, the idea of adhering to the same name as her brother and needing to discern between them which was being referred to as an off putting idea. Even as she continues, a bit of fluster remains, as she tries to shift the tone of the conversation, her words being spoken quickly than she intends. “B-Besides, do you really want to jump into the multiple captain’s called Kuchiki situation that quickly?”

[jupiterlaser]

What do You need To Know After Bunion Surgery in Jupiter?

While bunion surgery may have few side effects, the surgery can bring massive joy and relief to people who are dealing with a lot of discomfort and pain. While can surgeons can perform open and minimally invasive bunion surgery in Jupiter, you will recover in a few days.

After the surgery is over, you will need to understand a lot of things so that you can manage a lot of things. You will need to follow the procedures and need to wear boots and take crutches, as you receive traditional bunion surgery.

There are other things, which you need to manage at home, as the foot doctor in Jupiter Florida completes the surgical procedure. You will be advised not to put heavy pressure on the feet for eight weeks.  Let’s check out other things in detail.

Pain

After you undergo bunion surgery, you may expect a lot of pain. If you use a penny slot machine, it can be helpful. It is necessary that you need to think that there is no pain when you are walking, eating, and even sleeping.

There can be more pain if you are undergoing complicated surgery. You will need to intake inflammatory medicines and painkillers before or after eating food.

While the scenario of hallucination may affect you, there can be a slight amount of dizziness, as you intake painkillers.

Swelling

When you undergo bunion surgery as a part of the foot and ankle treatment in Jupiter, you will experience swelling in the surgical area. While it can stop your movement, it will remind you that you need rest, as the place is hurt.

As the swelling will go away with time, there can less swelling if you take a rest for a long time. There may be the development of sudden swelling after the surgery is over. There may be a chance of development of infection for three days, after the surgery.

You need to place your foot at a higher elevation so that you can reduce swelling. While the nerves and tissues will stay calm, they won’t get excited to develop the pressure.

While you need to slow down the nerve conduction, you need to stop excessive swelling, by application of ice. Such application of ice will result in providing comfort to your surgical area.

You mustn’t use ice for a longer period on the fragile skin for a long period. You need to place the ice in the ankle, rather than the toes. It is necessary to use the ice, during the time of pain elevation.

There will be a 40% improvement in pain relief, as you practice elevation and icing after the surgery is over.

Mobility and Exercise

You must start the gentle movement, after some time once the surgery is over. The surgeons will tell you the light exercise and movements, which you can do after the surgery.

The doctors will say that you need to draw an imaginary line and move your ankle through the exact line, once the surgery is done. There should be cycle movement exercises, which will help you to bend your knees and rotate them.

Once you start to do light exercises and movements, your mobility of the legs and toes will gradually come back. You will be able to create an upward movement, once your pain is controlled. You will be able to press your toe against the ground, once the pain becomes less.

It is seen that it takes nearly six months to get a full joint movement after the surgery is over.

Sopping clots

When it comes to stopping blood clots, exercise is the most important thing.  You must continue to do the exercise regularly. While the blood clot in the leg can occur after surgery, the chances are very rate.

The orthopedic doctor in Jupiter Fl will tell you that you need to continue doing the exercises regularly.

Standing

As you complete the surgery is over, you should not stand immediately on your feet. The surgical area must heal in the first place. You should not start to walk and run immediately after the surgery is over.

The surgeons will prescribe the resting period, once the surgery is over. You should build up on your movements, during the first week after the surgery. The gentle walking can be started after you pass through the first week.

Wound

The top podiatrists in Jupiter Fl will tell you that you need to keep your surgical area dry so that the wounds can heal with time.  It is seen that the wounds will take two weeks to heal, after the surgery.

After the surgeons take out the stitches, you will need to regularly dress the wound. It is necessary to provide fresh air to the wounds so that they can get dry with passing time.

Final Thoughts

The aftercare of bunion surgery is very important for all. You will need to manage everything so that you can recover well from the surgery.

[polyghostfacehours]

Pining/crushing headcanons for billy & stu (or even poly!ghostbois) thank u so much! 💚

Yes! God, I have a lot of thoughts about how these two pine and crush. This got fairly long for both because I kinda just went ham with this lmao. Enjoy!

TW: Very Mild NSFW. Mentions of Disturbing Mental Behaviours. Blood Mention. Homicide mentions.

Billy and Stu Crushing/Pining Headcanons:

Billy Loomis:

Billy pining/crushing is a slow process

And this partly because I hc him as demisexual and demiromantic.

Billy has a hard time forming meaningful connections. It just doesn't come as easily for him as the average person. And that extends to his romantic life.

When Billy meets someone, there isn't an immediate attraction like there is for many non-demi people. A lot of the sex he had in the past was for physical stimulation, ego, or control, rather than a genuine attraction to that person.

He gains feelings, both romantic and sexual in nature, the more he gets to know a person that he vibes with.

So more than likely, this is a person he has either eavsdropped on and liked what he heard, a bold person who approached him first, or, the most likely scenario: a friend of Stu's that he gets introduced to.

It usually takes a few months. But once Billy catches feelings, it's over.

That person becomes all he can think about. It becomes pretty obsessive in the early stages. Like, if he sees someone else touching his crush, he will absolutely seethe and get angry not only at the offender but his crush too. Not very healthy of you Billy boy :(

He'll find himself intensely staring at the person, in that intense way of his, and he starts noticing little habits and details about them.

He gets this intense desire to know everything about them. Partly for his feelings, and partly because it makes him feel more in control of his feelings. After all, if he knows them in and out, they can't surprise him and hurt him.

Billy decides relatively quickly once he catches feelings if they're just a crush/feelings or if it's love. But boy will he deny the love one for as long as possible.

Billy isn't shy, and he's confident in himself. He doesn't feel embarrassed easily (unless it's regarding weakness/crying), so once he decides he likes a person, he will very boldly insert himself in that person's life.

Approach them after class, on campus, at the video store, at the mall etc etc.

He's much more comfortable approaching girls, due to society's standards and the time period. But make no mistake that Billy is just as into guys, and will eventually stop holding back.

He plays it cool and aloof as per usual. His personal bad-boy mask stays on for as long as he feels is necessary.

Most of his crushes have never seen that darker part of him. That's reserved for someone he genuinely loves.

And the way he knows he genuinely loves them? When he slips up. Billy is in control, but he's not infallible, and he makes human mistakes like saying something weird occasionally.

And if his crush reacts well? Billy wouldn't show it externally outside of a pleased smile or smirk, but internally he's on Cloud 9.

Definitely jacks it to the thought of his crush lol.

He's not touchy with his crush, BUT he will make physical contact with them in private.

I'm talking like, if you guys are laying on his bed talking, he'd brush his hand or leg against yours briefly. Or if you're in his kitchen making popcorn, he'll put his hands on your shoulders or waist to move you to the side when he goes to open the fridge.

His loves consumes his thoughts. Like a lot. It's very frustrating to Billy.

But his crushes less so, bc honestly Billy has trouble taking his own crushes very seriously.

Okay, so this is just a super personal and maybe ooc hc, but I like to imagine that Billy imagines his love interest (not crush, I'm talking love love) with him in the room when he feels really bad or sad. Like, he imagines their presence and it grounds him. This'll sound sad, but kinda like an imaginary friend.

The dangerous thing about this is that, if he does hang with that person regularly, he sometimes has trouble differentiating when that person really was there and when he was just pretending they were. So he might mention something to them that they have no idea about bc they weren't there and that really fucks with him.

Stu Macher:

Hah, oh boy. If Stu has a crush he is not at all shy about letting it be known.

Unlike Billy, Stu's confidence isn't a mask. He genuinely has no issues approaching someone he's interested in.

Also unlike Billy, attraction for Stu happens at first sight. Does he like what he sees? Yes? Then he'll go for it if he's single.

Very touchy feely. Like, has no qualms about putting his hands on his crush in public. Hands on the waist, slinging an arm over their shoulders, picking them up, pulling them on his lap. Girl, boy, it doesn't matter. Stu is so confident in himself people can't help but not judge him. And if they do, Stu just doesn't care bc he knows people will still like him cause he's rich and throws banger parties. Sad, but true.

His crush might think he's just touchy like that with everyone, but honestly, Stu doesn't go around grabbing his friends that much and in many of the ways he grabs his crush lol. That's why it's so easy to tell when he's down bad.

When he crushes on someone, he lights up when he sees them. I'm talking internally. Stu actually has very little regard for most people, and much of his excitement around them is performance art. But around his crush? That shit gets to him inside.

Stu in love and Stu crushing is honestly not that different in behavior. He's very open with his crushes/loves (well about most things, not the murder things), and stays a pretty excitable and confident party guy.

The difference is in how okay he is being not excitable. Being more calm, or cold, or just sharing his more....disturbed thoughts in general.

Don't get me wrong, Stu is genuinely just a happy-go-lucky guy. It's not like fake or anything. It's just...if he loves you and he knows you're okay with him in all ways, then yeah he lets himself be sad or mad around you.

God, in the "honeymoon" phase of his crush, you could do literally no wrong. Everything his crush does has him over the moon.

He doesn't have his crush consume his every waking thought like Billy does with someone he loves, but he does think about them a lot and has no qualms calling them up.

Jacks off to the thought of them too. And I'm talking like, a lot. Almost every night.

Stu does have a problem with imagining his crush too perfectly? Like, he'll imagine them one way, and then they'll be another. And it gets him angry sometimes and he doesn't know why? Like he gets over it relatively quickly, but this happens.

Stu loves gore. A lot. And he can't help but wonder what his crush would look like dead, or at least very bloody. If he loves them, he doesn't actually want them dead...but if it's just a crush? Does he still want to rip them apart? Hm. Jury's still out on that one.

He will make his crush laugh at every opportunity. Like, he will legit take notes of what types of jokes hit with them and bust them out as much as possible around them.

If he sees someone else touching his crush, he gets beyond annoyed. Like, he will absolutely rip that person a new one via bullying. And if it happens at one of his parties? He will publicly humiliate them.

Has no qualms about it and never feels bad about it. Empathy is not this man's strong suit.

God he's the kind of guy who will offer his sweater or jackets to his crush to wear them at school. Like if he goes to his crushes house he will purposefully leave his clothes there and just tell them to return it to him later or use it once it starts getting cold ;)

The amount of money this man has spent replacing sweaters and jackets he gave to crushes is embarrassing lmao.

Stu honestly tries to get physical with his crushes early on. Bc he has feelings, it's usually not a pump and dump scenario like his flings, but he will want to fool around and do fwb stuff pretty early into the friendship.

Stu will try and buy his crush. Like, not kidding. He actually gets a bit offended if they don't want him to. Toxic rich boy is toxic.

But if it's not just a crush, but love? Holy shit is this man loyal. When Stu falls then, much like Billy, he falls hard. it's intense man. He becomes extremely loyal to that person, would do literally anything for them, no matter how fucked up it is.

[languagefluent01]

10 Best Spanish Novels for Improved Spanish at All Levels

One of the most acceptable methods to learn a foreign language is through "genuine materials," or items created in the language. Reading novels published in Spanish helps you improve your language abilities, but it also teaches you a lot about the culture that developed it!

If you want to be fluent in the Spanish Language then the most effective way to learn Spanish is to join an excellent Spanish language class in Nagpur city. This is if you live in Nagpur. 

Continue reading to discover eleven Spanish-language novels and stories for readers of all skill levels. We receive affiliate compensation when readers buy our independently chosen editorial choices, which helps fund our work.

1. Mara Torres's La Vida imaginaria (The Imaginary Life)

This book, a finalist for the prestigious Premio Planeta in 2012, follows Nata as she tries to pick up the pieces after her long-term lover leaves her. The story follows Nata as she relives many eras of her life while attempting to stay in the "real world."

While the tale does not follow the usual beginning, middle, and finish plot structure, the terminology is not unduly complex. Some colloquial terms and slang are sprinkled throughout, but it's not a challenging read.

Level: Beginner-Intermediate

2. Isabel Allende's La house de Los sprites (The House of the Spirits).

This work, written by the world-famous Chilean author Isabel Allende, blends elements from the supernatural realm with those from our ordinary lives. The novel follows a family through four generations, recalling the struggles of the post-colonial Chilean political movement through the eyes of those who lived through them. This narrative, which focuses on aspects of love, family, death, and revolution, is likely to enhance your Spanish and provide some insight into this critical and violent period in Chilean history.

While there are some convoluted stories and severe family tensions in this novel, the language is lovely and detailed. It's a little more brutal, but if you stay with it, you'll be glad you did (and so will your Spanish level)!

Intermediate level

3. Laura Esquivel's Como agua para chocolate (Like Water for Chocolate).

Laura Esquivel, a Mexican novelist, wrote the book, a must-read for everyone interested in culture and cuisine. That's correct—cooking! Each of the twelve chapters, named after the months of the year, begins with a recipe.

In the novel, Tita, a young Mexican girl, longs to marry Pedro, the love of her life. Unfortunately, she cannot leave home and seek a life of her own due to her mother's staunch commitment to family custom that the youngest daughter stays with her and care for her until her death.

The recipes that begin each chapter blend effortlessly into the plot, adding an artistic touch to an already complex story. Tita cooks each meal while recalling an anecdote from her life as she battles through her coming-of-age experience.

Intermediate level

4. Juan José Saer's El entenado (The Witness)

This book presents a terrific and compelling narrative, but it also raises many fundamental, probably unanswerable concerns about the human condition.

The plot follows Juan José Saer's youthful protagonist as he sets off into the unknown. He and his expedition crew will come face to face with the residents of the new world, and a slew of philosophical dilemmas will arise.

Not only will your Spanish improve, but so will your intellect. This narrative will take you on a wild ride into the unknown while also providing fresh ideas and unique viewpoints on life, death, order, and chaos.

Intermediate level

5. Ruben Dario's Short Stories

Short tales are an excellent way to begin reading in tiny doses. You'll still be engaged in the world of fiction while avoiding intricate narrative lines and drawn-out scenarios.

Nicaraguan Modernist novelist and poet Ruben Dario's short tales are written in the Modernist style. Dario is regarded as one of the ancestors of this 19th-century literary movement emphasizing the value of nature and the foreign.

6. Gabriel Garca Márquez's El amor en los tiempos de cólera (Love in Times of Cholera).

This novel by Colombian author Gabriel Garcia Márquez was released in 1985 and was turned into a film.

This is a love story, sort of. While many characters contribute to the story's development, there are two that stand out. Florentino and Fermina's love is banned from the outset. After years (decades, actually) and a slew of other adventures apart, the two are eventually reunited.

While some may see this narrative as real love withstanding the test of time, others believe Garcia Márquez's ultimate intention is to draw a parallel between passion and disease (i.e., lovesickness). This is accomplished by drawing parallels to the sickness that afflicted the historical period in which it was set (the late 1800s to early 1900s), Cholera.

Intermediate to Advanced

7. Lazarillo de Tormes's Life (The Life of Lazarillo de Tormes)

This work, one of the great masterpieces of Spanish literature, was written in the 16th century by an unknown author. The tale, registered in the form of a letter, follows the main character Lazarillo as he navigates his way through the hardships of his day.

This narrative is a societal criticism and is considered the antecedent to the "novel picaresca," in which the main character is the precise definition of an "anti-hero." In a sometimes hilarious fashion, it seeks to expose the hypocrisy of religious figures of the day (especially surrounding the idea of the Inquisition, which was in full swing).

This work is suggested for advanced learners, even though it was written centuries ago and had a sarcastic, sometimes satirical tone.

Advanced level

8. Carmen Laforet's Nada (Nothing)

Despite being created in the past century, this work has won multiple accolades and is considered a Spanish classic. This novella, published in 1944, offers a critical look at post-Civil War Spain and the poverty and suffering that were a big part of daily life.

The plot follows Andrea, a young woman, coming to Barcelona to live with her grandmother, where she plans to study and begin a new life after the war. The state of her childhood house, where she had so many happy memories, leaves her thoroughly disillusioned and provides the perfect background for her stay in the city. This novel is a coming-of-age narrative that follows the main girl through some of the most challenging moments of her life.

This book will help you improve your Spanish, but it will also provide you insight into one of Spain's most turbulent periods.

Intermediate-Advanced level

9. Gabriel Garcia Márquez's Cien Aos de Soldad (One Hundred Years of Solitude).

One Hundred Years of Solitude, another well-known book by Colombian author Gabriel Garcia Marquez, was released in 1967 and followed one family over several generations. The novel is set in the imaginary town of Macondo, which serves as a metaphor for Colombia, and has both factual and fanciful aspects.

The Brenda family discovered and founded Macondo. It's a fascinating spot with unique qualities. Although the beginning looks idyllic, the Buenda family immediately confronts a slew of troubles, the majority of which they make.

The plot is complicated, with many precise and not-so-obvious meanings. The story's fundamental topic is the inescapable nature of Macondo (i.e., Colombia) and the fact that history appears to repeat itself endlessly, and the residents of the island are unable to break free from the cycle.

Advanced level

10. Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra's Don Quijote de la Mancha

No list of Spanish literature would be complete without including Don Quijote de la Mancha by Miguel de Cervantes, perhaps one of the most famous books of all time.

This novel follows the erudite and well-read, if somewhat annoying at times, Don Quijote and his not-so-bright but very beloved sidekick Sancho Panza and is written in two volumes, the first published in 1605 and the second in 1615. This narrative took on a life of its own after being intended as a spoof of the renowned "knight-in-shining-armour romances."

It is a satirical, humorous, tragic, romantic adventure story that not only acts as a historical criticism but also raises many concerns about the human condition in general. Don Quijote, the main character, becomes engrossed in a fantasy world of knights and monsters, damsels in distress, and castles on a hill. Quijote, who is on a quest to become a "caballero andante" (knight), meets many different characters that add to the story's multi-layered flavor.

This narrative is intended for more advanced learners due to the story's complexity and the period it was written. (However, more straightforward adaptations have been created and areas worth reading.)

Advanced level

Conclusion

The Spanish-speaking world has produced many books, short tales, novels, and poetry. This collection merely scratches the surface of a vast world of genuinely beautiful books.

So, how about you? Have you read any of the books on the recommended reading list? What were your thoughts about them? Is there anything else you'd recommend that we didn't mention? Tell us in the comments.

[pure-kirarin]

The rose left unwatered (Law x f!reader)

Heyo guys ! this is my first multi part fanfiction and I hope that you will all like it =w=.  No TW for now apart for coming smut in next chapters~  This was originally a request by @soul-stealer-reaper​ . Thanks for requesting :) originally you asked for a scenario with rough NSFW where Law has a crush on a girl that the government is afraid of and that has high bounty. As this will have some parts, everything you asked for will come in the next chapters so no worries :’) ! I won’t hide that wrote quite freely tho, I hope that it’s fine.  Synopsis : You have felt unwanted for so long that you forgot the last time you felt like you belonged. Quite paradoxical, when you are one of the most wanted “criminals” in the new world. You cross paths with Law after joining the strawhats at Fishman Island to “kill some time” and you both feel a weird connection from the moment your eyes met, curiosity, hatred or desire, did it really matter as long as feelings were involved ? ---------------------------

A rose left unwatered will wither, A heart left unloved will rot, A sweet dream left untouched will go bitter,  A love left unspoken will be forgot. Nemo -  Murder in Venice

The first time that Law saw you, he found you extremely annoying. He remembered that he saw your wanted poster somewhere, with one of the highest bounties that he has ever seen. Seeing such a high bounty made him raise an eyebrow at first, what could you have done to have the whole world on your back ? The second thought that came to his mind was that of detachement, then he flinched at that thought.

The first time that Law saw you in person was after his Allience with the strawhats. You stayed at the ship the whole time, you didn't even bother to follow others to punk Hazard or to help them with their plans. He thought that you were an extremely selfish person and you reminded him of the person that he hated most. That way you had of doing what you wanted without caring about others, the smirk you had on your lips at all times, never submitting, always acting so sure of yourself, it irritated him.

How could someone get such a strong reaction out of him ? He didn't even know, he always eyed you from afar and it was enough to know that you prfoundly, passionately got on his nerves.

You joined the strawhats in the Fishmen Island, finding your way to them and just asking to join. Luffy's simplistic demeanor meant that he accepted right away, not caring about who you were and not flinching at your high bounty.

You made it clear that you were just staying to be entertained, in fact, you didn't want to fight, you didn't want to help anyone, your curiosity was just peaked by Luffy, by that man that defied the world government, by that man that defied everyone at Marineford. You weren't impressed, but you just felt sympathy towards him and wanted to find some company.

You found what you were looking for, in fact, life with the strawhats was enjoyable, you didn't get along with Usopp or Nami. The former thought that you were « too scary » and would kill them in their sleep, the latter hated how little you were willing to cooperate.

You had your own reason, but nobody on that ship was able to grasp your personnality, you just had your own way of thinking, your own internal logic that nobody seemed to get. Who were you ? Why were you there and why was the whole world on your back ? All these questions were provoking Law, teasing him endlessly. His curiosity was growing day after day and you were always there, on a lounge chair enjoying the burn of the sun on your skin, not caring about anything else, not caring about him, not that he cared...did he ? You got on his nerves just by being there, he felt obseverd yet, he wasn't the kind of people to get flustered but your gaze was so intense, feline.

It was a soft night on the sunny, a few days before getting to Dressrosa.  On this night, the strawhats decided to gather around after dinner like always. They enjoyed socializing and spending time together, telling stories and playing silly games.  It was quite late so Momo was already sleeping. Everyone was on the deck enjoying some drinks and you were on the crow's nest, peaceful.

« Y/N-chaaawn~ » Screamed Sanji, making you look down. « Come have some fun with us, don't stay there on your own ! »

« - Yeah Y/N ! We're all having fun here. »  Said Luffy.

You jumped gracefully from the crow's nest just like a cat. You then looked around circularly before taking place between Law and Robin as she silently made some space for you. The atmosphere was light and everyone was enjoying themselves. Zoro was drinking bottle after bottle as Sanji was screaming at him. Usopp was telling you all for the tenth time about how he took down a sea king with his little finger and Luffy and Chopper were captivated by how cool that was.

You were just silently enjoying that sense of peace till Nami asked you out of nowhere

« Oh true Y/N, I actually never asked but I am curious, why is your bounty so high ? What have you done ? »

For a second your expression changed and everyone's eyes were on you. You just decided to tell them some kind of lie and you said that you killed a celestial dragon. Everyone looked at you in awe, killing a celestial dragon means that you had to escape from admirals. You excused yourself then saying you were tired, therefore going to sleep.

After hours of partying Strawhats went to sleep. You got out of the girl's quarter wearing only a night gown. Your thoughts were waltzing since earlier's events and you were looking melancolically at the ocean. The sound of the waves was so calming, you got close to the board of the sunny, placing your elbows on the wooden surface. You didn't notice it when Law came your way, he wasn't sleeping either, his sleeping schedule was always herractic. He was still intrigued by the lie you told earlier and by your overall attitude, something about you drew him towards you like a magnet.

-(Y/N)-ya...You didn't kill a celestial dragon, did you?

His voice was low and hoarse, stealing a murmur out of your lips. Your eyes met his, gray, icy. It was the first time he said your name outloud, actually, you briefly ever interacted since he got on this ship.

-Trafalgar ?..

You were wondering why did he bring this up, he never ever showed interest in you and you in him. In fact, now that you looked at him more in detail, you could say that he was an exceptionally handsome male with soft dark hair and a gloomy but all the more seductive cast of demeanor.

He could obtain any female he wanted at a snap of his fingers. You looked away and added :

-I thought that you disliked me. Why do you even ask ?

He raised an eyebrow, but got back to his stoic expression almost immediatly. He didn't know that it showed. However, you were wrong, he was starting to get intrigued by you, by your high bounty, by the detached way you acted. He was usually the one to observe and analyse people, but something about you...He couldn't put a finger on.

-I don't like lies.

-I have my own reasons...I'm sure there are a lot of things that you want to keep secret.

You hesitated then looked his side. He seemed calm still and just shrugged, ready to go back to his spot but then you added ;

-I lied because I didn't want to involve anyone in this...When I was just a child, I was a part of a dozen kids that were selected to take part into a « government experiment »...I don't want to go into details but...you clenched your fist, eyes fixed on an imaginary point in front of you I am the only survivor of that experiment...Therefore I'm being tracked... We were given power...To this day I don't know its extent...But I know that with just a blow of my fingers I could...you gasped How could a child be granted such a power ? Why did they have to choose for me ? I didn't want any of this....I never wanted to fight, I don't want to fight. I just wanted to be normal, to have a family, to feel wanted...haha...your laugh was bitter I mean, I know that I am the most wanted person you probably met, but I didn't mean it in that way. I hope that this satisfies your curiosity, Trafalgar Law.

Your eyes met, he looked in them, deep, searching for traces of honesty. You were telling the truth, there wasn't a doubt. He liked the way his name sounded out of your lips, it was the first time that he heard these three letters murmured by you. It's as if his first name sounded different, you had that way of saying it, almost like a whisper. You looked so vulnerable in your nightgown, so fragile despite your usual arrogant carapace. The fiery tigress looked like a sweet kitten and he was surprised by the way he just wanted to reassure you. He brushed that thought quickly and added, stoic ;

-I see, why did you tell me ?  

-You just asked me to, no ? I just felt like we were a bit alike...Ah. Also, quit asking me questions....This is starting to feel like a doctor examination...Now it's my turn to ask. Why do you even care ? I didn't think that the surgeon of death was such a curious person.

He scratched his chin, hesitating for a second, but then he just said bluntly ;

-The first time I saw you, I thought that you were extremely annoying.

- Ah ? you looked at him with a straight face, but still a bit offended If we're playing first impressions then...

-But I get it now.

He wasn't annoyed, in fact, he was just fascinated. It wasn't animosity that he felt but desire to know more about you. It wasn't that he was making sure that you're not endangering anyone, he wanted to look at you, it was just excuses upon excuses, rationalization for a case of irrational fascination. Now that the diagnostic was there, he could understand his emotions more clearly.

-You are talking in riddles but well...Whatever...Why did you form an alliance with Luffy by the way ? I wonder how you're able to handle all of his energy if you can't even stand mine haha.

-Let me correct you ; I don't hate you. He stops for a moment then he adds. There is a man that I would like to kill.

You turn now, back against the wooden border of the ship. You had an amused look on your face, wondering who was that man that he wanted to take down ;

-Now that's interesting ! Let me guess, who is it ?

-You are quite curious yourself, (Y/N)-ya...

He thought it was only fair, you opened up to him, he opened up to you, but telling you the details wasn't for now.

-So you are using the strawhats ?

-I am not sure who is using who. And what is your reason for joing the strawhats ?

-Luffy, you said with dreamy eyes, it's the D in his name...I have been drawn to people with this letter in their names like a magnet...I don't know...I just believe it's fate...

He was startled by your answer, so you knew about the « D �� letter ? He also had this letter in his name...He just added then, with a face that didn't betray his surprise ;

-Oh , a girl like you believes in such romantic stories ?

-And what is a girl like me like ? You added, amused. I mean, apart from annoying.

-...Quit it already.

His tone was stable as always. He didn't show it but he thought that it was cute of you, how you insisted and played along. You faced him, your eyes looking right into his and you weren't one to look down, oh no. Irisis into his irisis, looking for him and digging something into him. He didn't even know what you meant by such a look, once again, feline.

The salty smell of the ocean's water mixed with the odor of your fruity perfume made that moment a bit more enjoyable and he wasn't even the type of person to enjoy chatting.

Check mate, you made up for that horrible first impression. You added then ;

-You avoided my question by the way, why wouldn't I believe in « such romantic stories » ? What do you think you know about « a girl like me » ?

You got a bit closer, amused, and he thought that it was getting a bit dangerous. You had a fake woeful look in your eyes. His limbs were filled to the brim with that ocean perfume of yours mixed with that sweet taste, and for a second it was as if that odor operated some kind of spell over him, because a surprising thought occured to his mind ; what would your lips taste like ? Certainly salty like the ocean and a tad like peaches.

Unsettled and unfocused he said ;

-Shouldn't you be sleeping ?

In reality, he didn't want these thoughts to make a nest out of his head and decided to cut the conversation quite abruptly. Your rocked your body back, almost like a child and rose your eyebrows in a semi-sarcastic semi-dramatic way.

-I'm a bit too old for a bed time don't you think, Trafalgar ?

-Just Law.

-Yes yes ! L-a-w...See you tomorrow ! You're not as uptight as I thought.

-(Y/N)-ya.

He just said your name in a strict way, probably indicating that you needed to go. His tone was firm, stop teasing already.

You looked at him with a diminishing smile, pronouncing every single letter so slowly, stretching his name on your lips so that these three tiny letters seemed endless. You tossed your hair, and something about the whole situation, about your feminine charm, something about the breeze of the night made the both of you feel unbearable tension. The type of tension that happens between a man and a woman at three in the morning, that tension that makes every little detail, every look in the eyes, every brush of the fingers feel indecent.

The eyes of a woman can't lie, his ego was stroked as he thought he had a glimpse of your hidden desire.You turned to go back to the girl's quarters, his eyes still hanged on your silhouette. ----------- I hope that you liked this first part. Please tell me what you think. It is a great motivator to know that I’m writing and being read. <3 I wish you all a nice day !

[vivianweasley]

Pride and Prejudice (Chapter 5)

Summary: Your father is Lucius Malfoy’s cousin, and after the war, it was really difficult for you to find a job because of your last name. So your mother and Mrs. Weasley came up with a crazy idea. A fake marriage between you and Fred Weasley. 

In this chapter: It’s already the last month of your fake marriage. Is all of this really going to end?

Pairing: Fred Weasley X Malfoy!Fem!Reader

Warnings: angst, misunderstanding, insecurity, mean relatives, reader being jealous?

Word Count: 2.5k

A/N: I apologize for not updating for so long cuz I was feeling burnt out. And I apologize in advance for this chapter, but since it’s Pride and Prejudice themed, I had to include a part like this afghjldfk Also, I may or may not named one of the characters after a Pride and Prejudice character:)

Pictures are from Pinterest. Credit goes to the original owners.

Please do NOT repost or translate my work on any platform! Thank you! Reblogs and comments are always welcome:)

Pride and Prejudice Series Masterlist

Sometimes you would wonder what would it be like if you and Fred were friends when you were still in Hogwarts. And as your mind wandered through these imaginary scenarios, you would also daydream about what would it be like if you went to the Yule Ball with him. But regardless, just being in this moment, dancing with him to your favorite love song, was magical enough.

You were invited to Fred’s cousin’s wedding, along with the other Weasleys. Playing the character of Fred’s wife for almost eleven months now made you a regular guest to all kinds of the Weasley family gatherings. 

As the music played and the guests joining the bride and groom on the dance floor, you and Fred decided to join, too. 

“I’m definitely playing this song at my own wedding!” you were excited when your favorite love song started playing.

“And I’m definitely play something livelier,” Fred smiled as he commented.

“Glad we’re not having the same wedding then,” you glared at him, trying hard not to step on his foot. “I have a feeling our idea of an ideal wedding would be completely different.”

“So what is your ideal wedding?” Fred asked. You looked up at him and realized he looked sincere. 

“I haven’t really thought about it, but a small wedding with my close family and friends would be nice,” you answered. You left out one detail. All you could think of now was what would it be like if you could really marry Fred. But of course, you wouldn’t tell him that, “I’m assuming yours would be something more exciting.” 

“Of course!” If you paid attention, you would notice the blush climbing up on Fred’s cheeks, but you were too flustered by your own daydreams. 

“Let me guess, someone would probably turn into a canary.”

“Very likely,” he replied while twirling you around with the music, “and that someone is probably you!”

You laughed as you twirled. You weren’t paying close attention to your steps, and your right foot tripped your left foot. But you landed in Fred’s arm.

You looked up at him as your heartbeat started to pick up. Your lips were only inches away now that you could already feel his breath brushing lightly against your lips. 

You didn’t know how long has passed as you two both froze on the spot. Just a little bit closer and your lips would be pressing together. You never knew you wanted this kiss so desperately until now, and the fact that this was already the last month of your one-year marriage contract made it worse. You would be lying if you say you have never fantasized about Fred reciprocating your feelings, and this fake marriage could turn into a real one by the end of the year. 

“Fred?” A voice interrupted this moment and your daydream.

Fred pulled away awkwardly with the blush still tainting his cheeks. “Mrs. Collins? Maureen?”  You turned and saw the owner of the voice was an older woman and beside her was a beautiful younger woman, who’s about your age.

“Freddie! I haven’t seen you in ages!” Mrs. Collins pulled Fred into a hug, and when she finally let go of him, her eyes turned to look at you.

“Oh, Mrs. Collins, this is Y/N.”

You put on a polite smile and held out your hand, “Hi, I’m Y/N-”

“Malfoy!” she cut you off, without acknowledging your hand, “I’ve heard that Freddie married a Malfoy. How interesting! How did you two meet?”

The way she said “Malfoy” and her question stung you. From past experiences, you knew this conversation is probably not going to end well. “Our parents are actually old friends, so we met when we were still little,” you answered, hands fidgeting and not looking at Mrs. Collins.

“What a coincidence! Cause Maureen and Fred have also known each other since they were kids, isn’t that right, Freddie?”

“Yea,” Fred smiled, not noticing how your expression froze in an awkward state, “Oh, Y/N, this is Maureen. We used to be friends when we were kids until she transferred to Beauxbatons.”

“Hey, it wasn’t like I had a choice!” She slapped on Fred’s arm, causing Fred to laugh while pretending to be hurt.

Watching them interact so naturally, you suddenly felt like you were interrupting something. A horrible feeling crept up in your mind. What if there’s already someone in Fred’s life, yet you still forced him to sign this stupid marriage contract?

“And Maureen’s an interior designer now! So if your little shop needs a makeover, I’m sure Maureen’s willing to help,” Mrs. Collins suggested. Her tone and expression all reminded you of your mum when she tried to set you and Fred up.

“Oh right! Fred,” Mrs. Collins continued, “come say hi to the rest of the family! I’m sure they all missed you a lot.”

“I would love to, but Y/N...” Fred looked at you. You couldn’t figure out what his expression meant? Was this an excuse because he didn’t want to go? Or did he want to go?

You didn’t know why insecurity started to cloud your brain. Growing up, you always thought you’re proud most of the time, but this was not the case when it comes to your last name. You knew you shouldn’t feel ashamed of it. The history and crime this name carried have nothing to do with you. And you knew feeling ashamed of it gives it power over you, but all you could do was retreating to your shell whenever someone brought up your last name.

So your final decision was, “It’s okay, you can go. I’ll go find Ginny.”

“Great!” Mrs. Collins started dragging Fred to her family’s table. Fred was still looking at you, but then you heard Mrs. Collins say, “Don’t worry about Y/N! I know she probably wouldn’t want anything to do with our sort of people, anyway.”

Your stomach sank. What did she mean by “our sort of people”? And more importantly, what did being your sort of people imply?

A few months ago, you thought changing your last name by marriage could solve everything. But the cruel fact was that it changed nothing.

And maybe it was your insecurity talking, but how could Fred not say anything when Mrs. Collins made such a comment? Did he not understand what she meant? Or did he...agree with her?

After they disappeared in the crowd, you immediately apparate back to the apartment like you were fleeing a monster from your nightmare. That was the only logical move you could think of at that time.

~

“Fred,” you kicked off your heels after you got back to the apartment from work and began rambling on about your day, “you won’t believe what happened today. I-” But the words choked in your throat when you saw another person in the kitchen. You recognized it was Maureen Collins from the wedding a week ago. 

You thought you already forgot about what Mrs. Collins said to you at the wedding, but those words immediately rushed back when you saw Maureen again.

“Oh, Y/N, you’re back!” Fred exclaimed, and he noticed the box in your hand, “Is that my favorite pie!”

“Yea, I didn’t know...” It was supposed to be a surprise, but now it just felt extra when it seemed like they were already cooking a meal.

“Oh, Y/N, I’m sorry we didn’t tell you earlier. This was really last-minute,” Maureen explained.

“Yea, Maureen was here to help with the makeover of the shop, and it’s almost dinner time when we were done, so we thought-”

“No worries,” you cut Fred off before he could finish with the explanation. You didn’t like the way he sounded. It almost made you feel like you were a party pooper. 

“We can just eat the pie tomorrow!” You tried to put on a smile when you shoved the pie into the fridge.

“Brilliant! All sorted now! Y/N, come help! Dinner would be ready faster if we had three people cooking.”

“Yea,” Maureen chuckled, “Fred was just talking about the first time you two tried to cook together. It must be difficult having to cook with an absolute idiot, let alone being forced to live with him for one year.”

Your heart sank. Fred told her that the marriage is fake? According to your contract, he shouldn’t have told anyone, unless...

Watching Maureen cooking and laughing with Fred, your mind just couldn’t shake off the images of her living here and being his real wife. You had to admit that you didn’t like these images, but why should you care if someone else is going to live here instead of you. Your mum forced you to live here anyway, and now you could finally go home.

Home. You sighed as the image of home appeared in your mind. And you finally admitted that for the past few months, you also considered this apartment your home.

But you put on the contract yourself stating that you both could date whoever you like during this fake marriage, and you had no business in interfering with Fred and Maureen’s relationship now.

So you picked up your jacket again, “Actually, I’m having dinner with my friend tonight-”

“But I thought you were planning to eat at home,” Fred pointed at the fridge, referring to the pie.

“Oh, that’s for tomorrow,” you lied, even though you knew your excuses didn’t match with what you just said a few minutes ago. You panicked, so you proceeded to say something that you never thought you would say, “Plus, I need to give you two space.” You even said it with a wink, covering for the fact that you panicked, and you just rushed out the door before anyone could say anything. 

~

You went back to your parents’ house for the night and only returned to the apartment the next morning. Knowing the exact time when Fred would usually go downstairs to the joke shop, you successfully apparated into the apartment without bumping into anyone. You just wanted to avoid seeing him.

You decided to start packing up. There are only less than two weeks left, and you didn’t want to occupy other people’s home for longer than you needed. Your pride demanded a graceful exit.

You knew it would be much easier and quicker if you used magic. Just by a flick of your wand, everything would be packed. It would be so clean like you’ve never been here before, but somehow, you just wanted to take your time with it.

And it was until you started packing when you realized how attached you were to this little apartment. One year wasn’t that long, just like what you said at the beginning of all this, but every corner of this apartment had trails of you living here and your memories.

It was just a contract, you tried to convince yourself, and now the time’s up. But it still pained you to remove your every trail. You realized you were not only removing your existence from this apartment but also Fred Weasley’s life. 

“Y/N?” You were so busy going down memory lane that you didn’t notice the series of footsteps coming upstairs. You turned and saw Fred, who looked very confused now as he glanced around and saw the packed boxes. “What are you doing?”

“Just packing up,” you tried to say it as indifferently as possible, “there are only two weeks left, so I thought I should probably start moving my stuff away.”

“Oh,” Fred paused for a moment before the corners of his mouth twitched into an awkward smile, “guess you’re finally free.”

“Yea, and so are you,” you tried to force a laugh, maybe he’s always waiting for this moment, the moment that he’s finally free, “I’ll move back to my parents’ house this week so that the divorce would look more realistic.”

His mouth opened, and you could tell that he was trying to say something. And for a second, you thought maybe he’s trying to think of a way to stop you. To say that he didn’t want you to leave.

But all he said was, “Okay.”

~

It was only around 6:30 am when you woke up. There were too many things on your mind that you couldn’t even enjoy staying asleep at ease. It was your last night here, after all.

Fred was still asleep with both his arm and leg on top of you. He’s an obnoxious sleeper, but you didn’t mind. 

You snuggled closer to him as your mind went through the nights that he comforted you when you couldn’t sleep, the sleepless nights that you would chat and laugh with so much ease, and the mornings when you woke with your limbs tangled together. It all felt like a dream, and maybe now it’s time to wake up. 

But before you do that, before you had to exit from his life, you just wanted to stay in this moment and stay in his arms for a little longer. You closed your eyes as you took in that familiar cinnamon scent and his cologne. Let’s just dream for a little longer.

~

Fred woke up with the other side of the bed empty. In a haze of sleepiness, he thought you just went to the bathroom. You would always come back to bed and try to squeeze in a few minutes of sleep before finally getting up and getting ready. But you didn’t come back today.

In fact, the apartment was awfully quiet today. He couldn't hear your footsteps rushing in and out of the bedroom to get ready for work. And he didn't hear you yelling things like "Did you see my keys?" or "FRED! Where did my apple juice go??"

Fred got up and tried to search for you in the living room, only to realize that most of your stuff was already gone. He collapsed on the nearby couch, not sure if he was still tired or feeling empty that you were gone.

How could you just walk away so easily? How could you just pull away from all of this almost like nothing ever happened? More importantly, how could you tease him about Maureen like it didn’t matter at all to you? And here he thought you two had great chemistry.

But without that and the contract of being fake husband and wife, Fred was confident that he could say you became friends. Even if you didn’t, at least you were roommates for a year, and that should induce some sort of emotion too.

But no, you just walked away, and all he could do was just getting used to not having you in his life anymore.

(to be continued.)

~

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[laufire]

(CW for mentions of csa)

A lot of Commonly Accepted (Often Through Uncritical Repetition) Wisdom in fandom leaves me baffled, when not straight up ticked off, but one that's been on my mind lately, that never fails to bring a scrunched up expression to my face, is the idea that Bela Talbot's backstory was some last minute add-on to her character.

You might argue that the reveal was rushed since the writers caved in and killed her off against their original plan (or at the very least, earlier than). Or that using abuse is a trite way to raise sympathy for an antagonistic character. You could even say that some of the finer details might’ve not been set in stone until they sat down to write her exist, although that one is dubious. But I’m never really going to buy that Bela’s backstory hadn’t been already planned, likely in big part.

The reason why is Season Three Episode Six, “Red Sky At Morning”, Bela’s second episode, co-written by Eric Kripke himself. As all episodes with Bela were, may I add; which means he had a hand in crafting her story from the beginning, as creator, director, and writer.

There Dean, a character that has been shown as sharp and intuitive (although his success rate ain’t that great when it comes to Bela, admittedly xD), immediately pegs her as someone with Issues TM, asking “how did she get like this”. He even taunts her by referencing her father, showing off his talent to hit where it hurts by asking if he “didn’t give her enough hugs”, ‘cause he’s classy like that. This visibly affects Bela, changing her demeanor in their conversation, from more playful to defensive. Hell, I remember during my first watch in real time this moment, especially paired with the rest of the episode, was when I first thought it was possible she came from an abusive family.

Because, c’mon. This whole episode is about parricide. The monster of the week is a ghost who haunts those that “spilled their own family’s blood”. We get two other examples: a woman whose accidental car crash killed her cousin, and two brothers who killed their father for the inheritance. Clearly, the ghost doesn’t have a narrow criteria when it comes to means or culpability -which makes sense given his particular story: he was tried for treason and his brother, the captain of the ship, issued the sentence.

And just as we find out this information... Bela sees the ghost ship that foretells her death. This, paired with the insinuations about an unsavvory past and her discomfort at the mention of her father, aren’t a wealth of information, but they start to paint a picture. We now know for a fact that Bela caused the death of at least one relative (mom and dad); that she wouldn’t have needed to do it directly (she made a crossroads deal); and that she might’ve had a sympathetic motive (her father sexually abused her and her mother turned a blind eye).

That scene offers some more tidbits of information about her past that seem too in tune with 3x15 to be coincidental, and that absolutely break my heart: Bela’s “You wouldn’t understand. No one did.“ and “I’ll just do what I’ve always done. I’ll deal with it myself”. See, I always thought Bela must’ve told people, when she was a kid. That she reached out for help not just to her mother, but to everyone around her that she thought could’ve help: teachers, maybe even law enforcement; adults that should’ve being worthy of that trust and protected her. Except no one did (and the fact that her family seemed to be not only very rich but influential paints a very bleak picture that surely contributed to her cynic view of the world). So she took matters in her own hands, and sold her soul for ten years of relative safety and freedom from her abusers.

To tie it all up, her final scene in that episode offers some more moments that again, are very in line with her backstory. We see how she treats relationships as transactionals: she pays ten grand to the Winchesters for saving her life, like she paid with her soul. Dean, again, draws attention to her likely messed up past by calling her damaged, and she replies that “takes one to know one”. Terrible childhood, ammirite. The show wasn’t been subtle here: it’s telling us Bela has a terrible past, like the Winchesters do, but of a different kind that has resulted in a different kind of person. So yeah, I think all the facts were hinted at back in 3x06.

We could go even futher back and point out 3x03, Bela’s introduction. One of the very first things she says in the show, during her first face to face with Dean (a character that just condemned his soul to Hell), is “We’re all going to Hell, Dean. Might as well enjoy the ride”. Sure, it could be an incredibly fortuitous coincidence; as a writer, I’ve had those and they’re damn great. But it seems VERY lucky, and more likely to be a case of the kind premeditated, well-placed foreshadowing that Kripke excels at.

So, okay. I’ve established why I think Bela’s backstory wasn’t a spur of the moment decision. But why is there a notable narrative in fandom that it IS?

First thing first, I want to get something out of the way: you don’t have to like it even if it was planned ahead. I understand it’s a very thorny subject, and to make matters worse, it’s inherently tied to her death. You might even be fine with the what, but not with how it was dealt with (although personally, I appreciate that neither the abuse nor her death were shown onscreen. In fact, the worse violence we see Bela on the receiving end of in her run is Dean’s threats and manhandling, which seems like a very purposeful choice ngl. Even Gordon freaking Walker was gentler lmao).

But I do disagree with some extended fandom opinions on the topic, and I guess that’s what the post is about. For one, I don’t see how the show “condemned” or morally judged Bela in this scenario. If anything, they clearly wanted to make her sympathetic, AND they showed Dean as being in the wrong by robbing him of information. Dean’s opinion on Bela couldn’t count for shit, for once, because he didn’t have the full picture; because Bela had deemed him UNWORTHY of the full picture, and thus anything he had to say on her couldn’t be taken at face value (except this is Supernatural, so I guess this was a little too much to ask of some people?). I think saying that just because Bela died and went to Hell as a consequence of her deal, IN THE SAME SEASON the same happened to our co-lead, because the writers deemed her evil and irredeemable is simplistic at best, and the audience projecting their own feelings (or being unable to see past Dean’s) onto the writing.

All that said, to go back to the initial point of all of this xD: WHY does fandom seem to insist on viewing this narrative choice as some cheap last minute addition?

There might not be one explanation that fits all, but I have a few ideas. One is that, if this wasn’t planned for and hinted at from early on, some people might feel as if this “absolves” them of their previous (and disgustingly hateful and misoginistic) reactions to Bela. Others will see this as absolving Dean, and maybe even Sam to a lesser extent, for not helping her and for being callous towards her; if her tragic backstory was this artificial, rushed choice made by Those Writers, then Dean wasn’t responsible for reprehensible attitudes towards someone who deserved his compassion (and it can’t be denied that this fandom loves absolving Dean of responsibility lmao). And a lot people are probably only repeating what they've heard from others as the accepted narrative, especially those that didn't even watch all of s3 if at all (Castiel is my fave too, but seriously, s1-3 are worth it).

It’s like they’re creating this imaginary separation between Bela pre-reveal, and Bela post-reveal, to make the situation easier to themselves. See, Bela pre-reveal was this annoying bitch who inconvenienced and embarrassed our leads (not to mention dared have chemistry with them), and thus deserved to be punished for it; or, if we’re going with more modern fandom sensibilities, she can be made to fit into the shallow #GirlBoss mold, with a side of “Secretly A Lesbian And Therefore Not A Romantic Threat” flavour -the current preferred method to make controversial female characters more palatable.

The reveal throws a wrench into this narrative. “Bitch who deserves her comeuppance” is a hard sell when you’re talking about a character who survived csa. And a shallow #GirlBoss reading doesn’t work if you have to acknowledge that Bela was one of, if not the most tragic characters in the entire run of Supernatural.

She spent over half her life at the mercy of her abuser(s), hurt by those who should’ve loved her and protected her most. The rest of her life was extremely lonely, with seemingly only a cat as company, and a surface-level freedom that hid under the sentence that loomed over her head. She died without a single friend, or a simple show of kindness and compassion, without anyone bothering to fight for her. And then she ended up tortured for who knows how long until she became one of her torturers.

All of that is extremely difficult to digest. And when things are hard to swallow, people do as people do, and they try to simplify them. So, sure. Bela’s reveal wasn’t ever hinted at, it’s completely removed from her character and the person we met, and is not even worth trying to fit into the narrative. Sounds easy.