jakjourneys

[abrilstevens]

madame web made me cry with laughter three times. and that’s cinema, babes

[b33zlebubz]

That last ask inspired me so how about reader gets REALLY bad migraines and just disappears for the night, missing dinner and then breakfast the next morning. The team goes to investigate!

yet another drabble I wrote under the counter at work oupe

TAGS: unedited, silly shenanigans, fluff, platonic found family, no content warnings RECKLESS ABANDON MASTERLIST

It seems they all suddenly want to pay you a visit and you couldn’t be more annoyed.

All the stress of everything seems to have all caught up to you at once.  With the lights too bright, your stomach attacking your insides, and the invisible band that seems to be continuously tightening around your skull—you’re practically bedridden.  

Slowly, the team begins to notice, and it starts with Price.  You’re not at dinner and he doesn’t know what to make of it.

He figures, at first, you’ve fallen asleep.  You don’t answer the door when he knocks so he leaves you to get some rest—knowing you need it.  He shoots you a text to let you know that him and the others will be busy with briefings and training the rest of the night to which you respond, hours later, explaining your predicament.  

The next day, Gaz is at your door.  His knock is softer than Price’s.  This time, you sigh and answer from your bed.

“What?”  Your voice is gravelly and muffled by the pillow your face is pressed into.

“Heading off-base for breakfast if you wanna come along,” he says, before adding, “Soap and Ghost are with me.”

“I’ll pass.”

There’s muffled whispering on the other side of the door.  British concern and Scottish protest.  Then, Ghost’s voice comes through the door.

“You alright in there, kid?”  

“Fine,”  you answer.  “Sick.”

Deciding not to press, they all decide to leave you alone for the time being—their voices fading to hush whispers as they disappear down the hallway.  You’re quick to sink back into a restless sleep, the uncomfortable cot stiff on your back and the pillow too flat for your neck.  Your peace doesn’t last long, though, because about two hours later you hear another knock.  

You wait for the sound of a voice, or maybe a second knock, but they never come.  Instead, there’s just the shuffle of a bag.

Your curiosity, momentarily, outweighs your pain.

Slowly you get to your feet.  Deciding against the dreaded lightswitch, you grab for your phone and use the light of your lockscreen to guide you to your door.  Then, slowly, you turn the doorknob and peak outside.

Soap is crouched in front of your door.  Surprised, he freezes in the act of placing a plastic bag on the ground—and you both just stare at each other for a moment.  

“What are you doing?”  You ask slowly.

He scoffs.  Instead of leaving the bag on the ground, he tosses it to your chest and you catch it.

“The Captain said you were havin’ migraines,”  he pushes himself to his feet.

“So?”

“So—I know the shit they’ll give you down at the med-bay doesn’t do fuck,”  he gestures to the bag.  “So me and Gaz went and got you shit that does.”

You eye him suspiciously, the very prospect of him doing something nice for you foreign and off-putting.  You’re shocked, to put it simply, after having done nothing but fight with him since you’ve arrived on base.  When you don’t immediately reply, Soap takes a breath.

“Anyway, I have shit to do,” he shoves his hands in his pockets before he turns to leave.  “And you’re welcome.”

You stare after him for a moment, still processing the interaction.  It’s only when he’s sauntered off down the hallway do you retreat back into your room and open the bag, expecting cheap, off-brand Tylenol or maybe some tea.  Instead, what you find causes you to let out an audible sigh of relief.

Excedrin, a water bottle, and a cold compress.  Thank fucking god.

[seoktized]

too far? (s.mt)

pairing: matthew x fem!reader

warnings: smut. somewhat mean dom!matthew, oral (m. receiving), matthew calls reader a slut, unprotected sex, creampie. lmk if i forgot any.

word count: 1.6k (kinda edited sorry for any errors)

a/n: finally done w/ this after putting it off for a month!! hope you all enjoy <3 also thank you to my baby @taeraelicious for inspiring me to finish this 😚

yes, you loved when matthew got jealous because that meant you’d get the best sex of your life.

but maybe it wasn’t such a great idea to tease matthew all night, wearing a short skirt that basically flashed everyone if you bent over, being overly touchy with his best friends or even worse; perching yourself on jiwoong’s lap.

he was furious, but he kept his jealousy hidden because he knew you were doing this on purpose. he knew you loved getting him all worked up in order to bask in the way he’d fuck you later on.

matthew tried to stay calm, but what sent him over the edge was how you had now leaned back against jiwoong’s chest, his hands finding place on your thighs, even going as far as caressing them.

matthew immediately stood up, apologizing to the boys, saying the two of you had to go. he pulled you off jiwoong’s lap, his grip was tighter than normal signaling that your plan had worked.

the drive home was silent, both of his hands were on the steering wheel gripping it tightly. usually he’d have his hand on your thigh or draped across the center console.

did you go too far this time?

he only spoke as he put the car in park, “you’re brave,” he paused for a second, “i want you to listen to me and listen to me carefully because i am not in the mood for your games,” he said turning his head in your direction.

his hand went up to pinch your chin between his fingers, forcing you to make eye contact with him.

“if i come inside and you’re not on the bed ready for me, i’ll go to bed and leave you untouched.” his tone was serious, causing shivers to run down your spine.

his hand dropped from your face and he was now facing forward and you took that as a sign to exit the car.

making your way to the door, you felt a little bad for pushing matthew this far, but you couldn’t help but feel a bit excited for the events that would follow.

you unlocked the door and stepped inside, taking off your shoes before walking up the stairs to yours and matthew’s bedroom.

you slipped off your top and your skirt, leaving yourself in the lingerie set you had picked out earlier which happened to be matthew’s favorite set.

hearing your phone buzz on the dresser you walked over to check who it was.

matty <3: you ready?

im coming in.

*one video attached*

your pressed your thighs together as you watched what he sent, it was a video of him palming himself over his jeans.

you heard the front door open and your placed your phone back on the dresser before scrambling back over to the bed, sitting with your legs tucked underneath your thighs.

the bedroom door opened to reveal matthew who had rid himself of his jacket leaving him in a compression shirt that hugged his muscles in the right spots.

matthew smiled a bit, seeing your eyes trail down his arms. he made his way over to the bed before reaching out to stroke your cheek.

“good girl,” he started, his hand suddenly went down to grip your jaw, bringing his face closer to yours.

“too bad you wanna act like a slut when we’re out.” he released your jaw before standing up to pull his shirt off.

though you’ve seen his bare chest many times, he never failed to take your breath away. you reached out to run your hand down his chest but your hand was swatted away.

matthew made a noise of disapproval, “you don’t get to touch me tonight, princess.” he then slipped his jeans off and your eyes immediately went to the bulge in his boxers.

“off the bed,” he ordered, he waited for you to climb off before he continued; “get on your knees.”

you obeyed and sunk down, now being face-to-face with the tent in his boxers.

matthew’s hand laced itself in your hair, pushing your face against his clothed bulge. he continued to rub himself across your face, groaning at the feeling.

“stick your tongue out,” he rasped, smirking when you obeyed.

he placed himself on your tongue, rocking back and forth. the friction from both his boxers and your tongue made him throw his head back with a grunt.

you let one of your hands drop between your legs, rubbing yourself over your panties.

matthew looked divine at this angle, his abs flexing everytime he moved his hips, his bottom lip finding place in between his teeth.

his eyes were now back on you, “move your fuckin’ hand.” he said through gritted teeth.

matthew felt himself growing closer to his peak so he pulled away, leaving you a bit confused.

“don’t wanna come yet.” he simply said.

matthew paused for a minute, his eyes trailing down your awaiting form.

“c’mere.” he said, pulling you to stand up. he sat himself down on the end of the bed, “sit right there on your knees.” he pointed to the floor.

you were a bit worried about what matthew had up his sleeve, but you obliged, sitting down in front of him.

“i don’t think you deserve my cock yet.” his thumbs hooked under the waist band of his boxers, lifting his hips up to push them down to his ankles.

you watched as his cock sprang out, hitting his stomach in the process.

he wrapped a hand around his length, stroking it slowly. matthew winced at the feeling, his hand gripped tighter, now fucking his hand at a slow pace.

you watched intensely wanting nothing more than to reach out and take him in your mouth.

matthew knew what you were thinking. he smirked watching how you ran your tongue across your bottom lip.

“pretty girl wants to touch, hm?” he waited for your response, smiling at how you nodded so eagerly.

“too bad, sluts don’t get what they want.” he spat. you felt tears start to well up in your eyes, wishing you didn’t tease him earlier.

matthew watched your facial expressions carefully. his eyes locked on the tears falling from your eyes, mentally noting that you looked so pretty like this, eyes red and wide, not wanting to miss any movement he made.

his groans rang through your ears, traveling straight to your core. you whined out hoping matthew would let you off the hook this time.

“do you think you deserve to be pleasured, doll?” he tilted his head to the side.

you nodded, “please matty, ‘m sorry for teasing you.”

a wicked smile grew across matthew’s face, “go ahead,”

once he gave you the green light, you pounced on his cock, taking him in your mouth. your tongue slid across the underside of his length. matthew groaned, his hand finding place on your head once again.

“fuck baby- slow down,” he moaned. you didn’t let up though, he’d teased you enough and you weren’t gonna stop now that you got what you wanted.

matthew knew he was going to come soon if you kept sucking him oh so good, so he pulled himself out of your mouth.

“c’mon doll. up on the bed,” he said, you arose from your knees and matthew moved out of the way so you could climb on the bed.

you crawled onto the mattress, pushing your ass out in the air and wiggling it in matthew’s direction. you heard a faint chuckle from behind before there was a dip in the mattress.

matthew ran his hand over the lacy panties you had on before running it down your back, pushing you to arch further.

he stroked himself a few times before running his tip over your clothed heat. he took his time, dragging himself at a slow pace.

“you’re soaking, baby..” he groaned. you whined in response, pushing your ass further in his direction.

“patience, doll, patience. you better be glad i’ve even gotten this far,” he snipped, “thought about leavin’ you like this, guess i still can, hm?”

“please don’t! ‘m sorry” you whimpered, matthew laughed at your desperation.

he pushed your underwear to the side, bending down to get a look at your glistening cunt. matthew groaned at the sight.

“prep or no?” he mumbled.

“just fuck me, matt!” you replied. he obliged and ran his cock over your wetness before pushing into your cunt.

you both moaned in unison at the feeling. matthew paused, relishing in the feeling of your pussy gripping him so tightly.

he bit his lip before sliding out then thrusting in harshly. you lurched forward, a broken moan leaving your lips. matthew gripped your hips, sliding his cock in and out at a ruthless pace.

the force of his thrusts made him hit that spot over and over again, making you scream his name.

“scream my name again—fuck—let everyone know who’s fucking you this good.” he said through gritted teeth.

“you are, matt!” you cry, his deep thrusts made your eyes roll to the back of your head.

“jiwoong couldn’t fuck you this good, huh? only i can right?” he chuckled, “you should’ve saw the way he was lookin’ at you. made me wanna bend you over the table and take you right there.”

“he can’t! only you—shit—only you can fuck me this good!” your hands that were flat on the bed were now gripping the sheets and your mouth opened in a silent scream as you came.

“so fuckin’ tight ‘m gonna cum!” matthew growled before he stilled, shooting his load deep into your pussy.

the room was filled with panting, both of you trying to catch your breath.

matthew pulled out, watching as your mixed juices leaked out of your hole.

you whined in overstimulation before letting your eyes flutter shut.

“let’s get you cleaned up, hm?” he said before picking you up and carrying you to your shared bathroom.

it definitely was a good idea to tease matthew all night long.

[sc0tters]

Wanna Bet | Quinn Hughes

summary: when Quinn tries to put you in your place it lands him in your sheets.

request: yes/no

warnings: sexual themes, oral (fem receiving!), p in v, swearing, choking.

word count: 2.51k

authors note: okay I liked this smut like way more than the Luke one from this morning. Quinn with enemies to lovers is something I don’t remember writing before but this was fun so we are gonna allow it.

Seeing Quinn always felt weird to you.

Since the moment you joined the Canucks you two just didn’t seem to get on, the constant bickering was enough to make anyone want to avoid you both. So eventually you both just accepted the fact that you were destined to be colleagues who tolerated each other. It was a silent yet assumed to be mutual agreement.

Yet it seemed that Quinn felt like testing that agreement as you were walking to your car as you were only meant to be working during the first groups practice session. Quinn had been apart of it and with what felt like the worst practice of his life especially after getting the C when you started asking him questions about his performance it only felt like a twist of the knife.

Quinn swore he was seeing red as he was hot on your tail “what the hell was that today y/n?” He spat as the door to the rink shut behind him.

You two were the only ones in the parking lot as you sighed “Quinn I did my job-” you spun around to explain it to him when you realised just how close he was to you.

The hockey player sent you a glare “your job is not to make me look like an idiot.” He pointed out crossing his arms that tightened as he was still in his compression shirt due to the rush he was in to get to you “don’t need to do that when you seem to do it all by yourself.” You flashed him a sarcastic smile as you turned back to your car where your face quickly dropped to a frown.

Quinn furrowed his eyes seeing that you had stopped “you forgotten how to walk to your car or something now?” The boy smirked “forgot to plug my car in.” You pointed out as you walked over to the plug your car into its charging station.

He couldn’t help but laugh “c’mon,” the hockey player motioned to you to follow him “you think I’m going home with you then you’ve got another thing coming Hughes.” Your eyes formed a glare as he walked over to you “princess I hate to be the one to tell you that it’s starting to rain so without me you’re shit out of luck right now.” Quinn’s harsh words made you look up at the sky to see the grey clouds that loomed over Vancouver.

Against your better judgement you nodded “where is your car?” You asked avoiding his smirk not wanting to see him win.

The drive back to your place had been awkward to put it lightly “you know you interviewing me like that was fucked up.” Quinn spoke as you stared at the traffic lights that illuminated a red glow in front of you “Quinn if you can’t handle the truth from me then maybe you need a reality check.” Your words were honest as you pointed your finger at him.

It made the boy scowl “I’m starting to see why Tito turned you down.” The Hughes boy mumbled as he started driving again “what happened between him and I is none of you business!” You groaned as you had helped the Canadian settle into the team when he got traded, and one night he ended up in your bed. The same thing happened twice more before you both agreed to simply be friends.

Quinn took your irritated state as an encouragement to go on “that must have been a bad night for him.” The boy continued driving on as the light changed to green “please I was a great fuck!” You blurted out no longer caring about your desire to have a filter “if anything I feel sorry for the girls that you sleep with.” Your words made the boy tense up as he turned to your apartment building “in fact I don’t think you could even make a girl come.” If you knew the response your words would get then maybe you wouldn’t have said it.

His knuckles turned white against the steering wheel as he gripped at it “don’t think you’re ready to eat your words.” Quinn confessed as you leaned against the centre console “I think you’re not ready to see that I’m right.” The car almost crashed as the boy kissed your lips.

It was strong as he brought his hand behind your head making sure that you couldn’t pull away “where do I park princess?” The boy asked as a hoot car from the car behind his “just up here.” Your cheeks turned pink as you could still feel his lips against yours.

He slipped his arm through your bags strap as he smiled watching you direct him to the elevator “who would have thought that the way to get you quiet is just by kissing ya?” Quinn cocked his head as your back was pressed against the elevator wall after you pressed the floor number “shut up,” you grumbled placing your hands on his cheeks as you pulled him into a kiss. His tongue danced over your lip as you moaned letting him slide it into your mouth “sorry,” a voice came from the doors as someone let out an awkward cough. You sent the guy a smile as Quinn pulled away from you. Thankfully you only had to stand there for a mere few minutes before you two got to your floor.

Your apartment door called your name as you dug into your purse to grab your keys when Quinn’s hands went to your waist “Quinn behave.” You pleaded as you felt his head drop to your neck “have I ever told you how much I love this skirt?” Quinn asked letting his lips nip at your neck as his fingers trailed over the shirt skirt “n-no,” you shook your head as you finally got the door open.

The two of you barely got into the apartment before he spun you around “want to see me make you come?” The hockey player smirked as he pushed your body against your door shutting it behind you “don’t think you could.” You tried to remain calm.

Quinn let his lips hover over yours “was gonna take you to your bed.” He confessed as he clicked his tongue “but now I’m going to make you come right here.” Your eyes went wide watching him drop to his knees “like to see you t-try.” Your palms grew sweaty as the hockey player pulled your skirt up revealing your white panties.

He let out a whistle hooking his fingers in either side of your panties “think you knew that you were gonna get fucked tonight.��� Quinn pointed out as he let your panties slide down your legs “told Tito to come o-” your words were cut off as Quinn lay his tongue flat against your slit licking a straight line before he practically pecked your clit “not so talkative now are you?” The hockey player smirked setting his tongue back on your clit as he let his two fingers thrust into your cunt.

Your hand slapped over your mouth as the boy comfortably found himself between your legs “let me hear you princess.” Quinn’s words sent shivers up your spine as you looked down to nod.

If you didn’t know any better you would have sworn that he was a starved man as he let his tongue work on you like you were his last meal “shit Quinn.” You groaned forcing your hips further into his face as your head pushed against the wood of your door.

Quinn left his pants grow tight at the sheer squelching noise that left your core as his fingers formed his scissoring motion as they thrusted deeper into you “you want to come princess?” He asked using his free thumb to rub against your clit “c’mon I know you want to just let it go.” With that the hockey player brought his lips back to your clit finally setting you over the edge “don’t stop.” You cried out as your fingers locked into his hair as you rode his face feeling him smile beneath you.

The hockey player pulled his fingers out from your core watching how they shone begin covered in your juices “taste how sweet you are princess.” Quinn ordered bringing himself back up to his feet as he tapped his fingers on your lips “pretty good for a guy that can’t make you come huh?” The boy smirked as your tongue swirled around his fingers like it was his cock in your mouth.

When you moaned it made him realise that his pants could no longer take simply watching you “where is your bedroom?” Quinn asked furrowing his eyebrows as he picked your panties off of the ground shoving them into his sweatpants pocket “you can get those back if you are good in bed.” The boy reminded you about the claim that you had yet to make good on.

You giggled beginning your walk to your room as you slowly began to shed your clothing starting with the Canucks polo that you were sporting revealing your black bra “you’re playing a dangerous game princess.” Quinn warned as you sent him an innocent grin “what are you going to do about that?” You clicked your tongue as you slipped behind your bedroom door pulling the skirt off of your legs as you were left in nothing but your bra when he came into the room.

Quinn took in the sight of your gorgeous body as he smiled eyes meeting yours “isn’t fair that you’re in so little is it now?” His voice was soft as your fingers danced over his compression shirt “leaves little to the imagination.” You pointed out shaking your head “knew you liked looking at me in this.” The hockey player lightly pushed you onto your bed as he pulled his shirt over his shoulders revealing his abs that made your mouth water “like what you see?” Quinn teased as he repeated the same action with his sweatpants leaving himself in his boxers.

Your eyes were practically glued to the bulge i that was barely hidden by the material “think you do too.” You teased as you watched him grab a condom from his wallet before he came down onto your bed with you “you’re taking your time cap.” You pointed out as you smirked seeing his expression harden.

What you didn’t expect was that he would flip you over causing your face to land in the fluffy blanket that sat on your bed “fuck princess I wanted to fuck you good but I guess I’m gonna have to fuck you like the brat you are.” Quinn grunted reaching down to break the clip in your bra letting your breasts hang free.

A whimper left your lips as you heard the sound of the condom wrapper ripping behind you “please Quinn.” You begged waiting to feel him against you.

Quinn smirked “you know that you aren’t calling me that anymore.” Before the hockey player gave you a chance to respond his cock was running over your clit before he let it thrust into your cunt.

Your hands could barely keep your body up as you adjusted to his size “Jesus cap!” You groaned letting your head drop into the mattress.

His hands grabbed at your hips bringing your body back to meet each of his thrusts “god princess you’re so right.” Quinn let out a grunt as he watched how your cunt repeatedly swallowed his cock as he made sure to bottom you out.

All you could do was nod as your hands grabbed at the comforter beneath you “shit Quinn.” You moaned as you began grinding your hips against him when the boy brought his hand down to slap your ass.

The gesture made you jump “you know that’s not what you’re calling me tonight.” The boy mumbled increasing the pace of his thrusts “you got a captains kink huh cap?” You asked letting your head turn to look at him as you smirked “get all hot thinking about me-” you were cut off as a moan left your lips “calling you cap when you fuck me?” You got your words out before he slapped your ass again.

Quinn felt his breath waiver as you clenched around his cock “should be finding a way to get you to keep quiet before you start running that fucking mouth.” With one movement he leaned down picking your body up “guess I’ve got to take matters into my own hands.” His words vibrated in the shell of your ear as his hand wrapped around your throat bringing you flushed against his torso.

The angle caused the boys cock to slide deeper into your cunt and that combined with the decreasing blood flow to your brain meant that you were overwhelmed with pleasure “fuck cap.” You cried bringing your hand down to rub at your clit as your head lay against his shoulder.

He took it as encouragement to go faster as your pussy began clenching around his cock more frequently “I’m gonna come,” you announced not seeing him shake his head “fucking beg for it.”

His order rang through your ears as you forced your eyes open “please let me come cap, I need you.” You pleaded almost having tears from in your eyes as you feared him saying no.

Quinn felt his cock throb “I’ll be your good little girl.” You added making him laugh “think you are already that baby.” The hockey player pointed out as he pressed a kiss to your temple “got you right where I want you right now and you can’t do shit about it.” His reminder made your cunt clamp down on his cock.

The boys hand squeezed around your throat “let me hear you go.” He smiled as you let out a min forcing your fingers to go even faster on your clit.

Your orgasm caused your body to shake against him “fuck fuck fuck!’ You cried not realising that your actions spurred on his own orgasm “so good princess.” Quinn cooed as he coated the inside of the condom with his come.

As his hand released your throat your body came down onto your bed as you let out a large breath “was I too rough?” He asked letting his cock slide out of your soaked cunt.

Quinn lay next to you as he watched you look up to him with a smile “not that was hot.” You blurted out leaning up to grab a hoodie off of your floor “where do you think you’re going?” The hockey player furrowed his eyebrows.

You turned to him with a smirk “I’ve got to go pick up my car.” You explained as to your surprise he shook his head reaching out for your hands as he pulled you back onto your bed “we aren’t done just yet.” Quinn mumbled cupping your face in his hands as he kissed you.

Clearly you were in for a long afternoon.

[racergirl-112]

Push Me Over - Chapter 2: Down Bad

MDNI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Content: Adult, Smut Warnings: mentions of orgasms, vibrators, language

A few days later

After a few days of shooting the main cast, Dani was finally making her debut on set. She had spent the morning in her trailer in hair and make-up and now was finally in her costume, the form fitting spandex, being more revealing than she thought. She heard the call over the radio of her assistant Kayla, that it was her time. 

“Are you ready?” Kayla asked. Dani nodded her head. Kayla replied to something over the radio before walking Dani to the main soundstage where they would be filming today. 

While they were on break from a scene, Ryan and Shawn were looking over some footage while Hugh scrolled through his phone. He had been divorced for a week and he and his ex hadn’t announced it yet, but he had people asking what had happened. He wasn’t really to ready to talk about it yet, nor was it anyone’s fucking business. He just happened to glance up as he saw Dani walk on set. The black spandex suit they had her in was hugging her curves and made her breasts prominent. He couldn’t pull his eyes away or stop the erection growing in his suit. She’s young enough to be your kid… 

Filming had wrapped for Dani for the day and she had gone back to her trailer to de-compress for a while after getting out of her costume. After being around Hugh all day in that suit and how it hugged all the right parts of his body, she needed to get away and fast. She pulled up the internet and searched his name. His filmography as well as his theater accolades popped up immediately, followed by his personal life. It said he had been married to a fellow actor for more than two decades and they had two kids. Her heart sank at reading that, but was happy to see a man in Hollywood stay loyal to his wife. 

At that new revelation, she grabbed her bag to leave and go back to the condo they had her staying at during filming. She put her headphones in and Push Me Over by Maren Morris began to play. Some of the lyrics being very prominent of how she had felt all day on set with Hugh. She began to hum then started singing out loud, closing the trailer door behind her and not paying attention to her surroundings. As she turned to leave, she ran into a body. It took a minute to register who it was, but when she saw the yellow and blue, her heart began to race. 

“Um, hi,” Dani said, embarrassed. 

“Hi darlin’,” Hugh answered. “You leaving for the day?” She nodded her head yes, taking her headphones out and putting them in her bag. 

“Yeah. Thought I’d go back to my condo, order some food and binge watch some tv. What about you? What are you doing at my trailer?” 

“Damn, are you always this questioning?” he asked, his eyebrow raising. Dani mentally added that to the on-going list of hot things this man did. 

“I was just asking a question,” she replied sarcastically. 

“I was going to tell you how great of a job you did today.” 

“Thank you?” she questioned. “I guess you haven’t seen my great background work prior?” The smartass smile on her face, making Hugh turned on as hell. 

“Damn sweetheart, you are a smartass. Didn’t your parents teach you to be nice?” 

“Not to strangers,” she smirked. 

“How about we fix that? Want to grab coffee sometime?” Hugh asked. Before she had a chance to register what her mind was thinking, she said it out loud. 

“No offense, but aren’t you married? I don’t want any headlines about me being a homewrecker.” That comment took him aback just by the look that came across his face. 

He closed the space between them and looked around before he spoke. “I’m actually divorced. It was finalized last week, but I haven’t told a lot of people. So, no sweetheart, I’m not married.” She felt like someone had sucked all the air from around them and they were outside. His face was inches from her’s and god did she want this man to kiss her. 

“Well, um,” she felt like she forgot how to speak. “I’m sorry. I know I don’t really know you, but if you do want to talk about it, I’m more than happy to listen. I’ve got to get going though.” 

“I’m going to hold you to that sweetheart,” he replied, his words sending shivers down her spine. 

After getting out of his costume, Hugh got back to his flat, throwing his stuff on the table. He wasn’t sure what the fuck had happened today, but he had been ready to fuck Dani into next week. He grabbed the bottle of Whiskey from the cabinet and poured himself a glass, replaying what had happened. Sure he had had eyes for only his wife for the past 27 years and had done countless love scenes with other co-stars, but there was something about Dani that made him want to break all the rules, especially the one where she was the director’s niece. He downed the whiskey and let the burn flood him as he closed his eyes, thinking about Dani. 

She had been semi right when she told Hugh, she wanted to go back to her condo and eat and binge tv. The food part had been right, but after their little conversation outside her trailer, she found herself using her vibrator to get her off while thinking about Hugh. How she wanted his muscular arms to wrap around her while he made love to her or fucked her into next week. Honestly, she didn’t have a preference. The more she thought about him, the quicker it got her high and soon she was reaching her orgasm. How the fuck was she supposed to stay away from him?

[to-the-stars8]

Learning to Love Slowly

Jason Todd x Reader All Chapters AO3

58-Masks and Confessions

Over a year ago

Jason could feel his breath hitch in his throat when your hands came up to his mask, feeling the texture before finally going to the back of it to feel for a release button. He told you could do it, but that didn’t stop the unease. What would you do when you realized it was him? The guy who you had called your best friend and shared your deepest secrets with. It was the fear of you wanting nothing to do with him that had kept him from telling you. 

As you felt along the jawline of his helmet, you mumbled, “You gotta release or something on this?” 

Jason chuckled before taking your hands into his gloved ones and putting them back at your side. You took the hint and kept them there as he reached up and behind on his helmet. There was a click followed by a sound of released compression. Before Red had taken the helmet off, he said, “Promise me you won’t get mad.”

That line had sounded too familiar to you, and the wheels in your head had started to turn. You only nodded and whispered, “I promise.”

Jason pulled his helmet off, taking in the cool air of your apartment and opening his eyes to meet yours. You were speechless, staring at him with eyes so wide that Jason could practically see the thoughts connecting in your head. Nothing came out of your mouth, and he wasn’t sure if he was grateful or displeased by it. On the one hand, you didn’t seem angry, but, on the other, you weren’t saying anything at all which left him in the dark about your feelings. 

“Jason,” You let out a gasp. Before yelling, “Jason!”

Sheepishly, he said, “That’s me.”

“What—why—No, when…” You stopped talking, plopping down onto the couch and burying your head in your hands. He slowly sank next to you, about to ask if you were okay before you looked back at him. “I think I’m mad at myself for not noticing sooner.”

Jason smiled. “I hear I’m a really good actor.”

You chuckled before turning to bury your head in your hands. “Oh, fuck me, why didn’t you tell me sooner? Were you worried that I would tell people?”

Jason was quick to deny this. “No, I just didn’t want you to think differently of me. Or hate me because…ya know.”

You wanted to hug him, to reach out and take him into your embrace. “I don’t hate you.”

Jason’s mouth felt dry and his hands shook a bit as anxiety and excitement all started to churn in his chest. If it was any worse, Jason seriously thought he was going to throw up all over your coffee table. Nodding his head, he ran his hands down the front of his pants in an attempt to get the sweat off his palms until he remembered he was wearing gloves. 

“That’s—that’s good to hear,” He said, trying to keep his voice even. 

“Yeah,” You looked away from him for a second before back at him again. “This might be a bad time, but I—I really can’t stop thinking about it.” 

“What?” 

You acted like you didn’t hear his desperate question. “Now that I know that you’re Red Hood and Jason Todd, I feel like it all makes sense now. You know?” 

Jason tried to be patient, but the anxiety was wearing it thin, “You really gotta just come out with it, sweetheart. You’re killin’ me over here.” 

After a second of staring at him, you said confidently, “I like you, Jason. A lot.” 

All at once Jason felt the sudden joy of your affection hit and it made him dizzy. He stared at you before choking out, “Really?”

You smiled, nodding, “Really. I’ve been so confused because of how I felt about you and Red Hood. It was weird because I liked you both for the same reasons. Now I know why.”

Jason felt the urge to lean forward and kiss you, but he wasn’t ready for that. He took a deep breath, finally saying, “I like you a lot, too.”

Grinning, you looked away to hide the blush coming to your cheeks. He turned his head, too, to hide his even though you weren’t looking. Jason couldn’t remember ever being so happy, not recently at the least. You liked him. Red Hood and all. The sensation made him want to jump around the room like a teenager. 

“So,” You said, turning back to him. “Do you, um—do you wanna go on a date? Like, I don’t know, tomorrow? Or, is that too soon?”

Jason couldn’t think because now you were asking him on a date. A real date. He could fucking giggle, he was so excited. He saw the anxious waiting on your face, and he realized he was taking way too long to answer. “Yes! Yes. I’d love to, and tomorrow is fine.”

You smiled again, looking back down at your lap, before reaching for his abandoned helmet on the coffee table. Throwing it between your hands, you felt up the sides and top, before starting to put it on Jason’s lap. You stopped just as his hands brushed it, taking it and flipping it over to see the inside. 

“It must get hot,” You said, holding the helmet up at just the right angle so you could see through the eyes of it. “Maybe, if you want, you could tell me more about being Red Hood?”

Jason smiled, taking the helmet from your hands. “Maybe. I don’t want to turn you off from me.”

“You won’t.” You assured him, and he could sense your sincereness. 

For the first time in a long while, Jason looked forward to tomorrow.

[hazelfoureyes]

What if... In Safeword Radioapple... Alastor and Lucifer were so engrossed with their beef that they missed the tap-tap from Y/N?

oh I think we’d (reader) die and respawn? Like it would be a bad time for us Lmao

for me, the tap tap is for when the person cant speak loudly or clearly, usually because of choking or compression (if you cant expand your lungs you cant speak loudly or in some cases at all, even if you can breath enough to stay conscious) , as well as a way to let the partner say like “no” and “stop” in passion but not in earnest. Maybe the pleasure is so great it’s overwhelming and you say “stop”, but don’t mean it? Then don’t tap tap, say whatever you want. Or say tap tap I guess,idk that’s your shit now

This is from ✨personal experience✨

I *“came up with” tap tap with my former partner because he had giant hands and once, while trying to cover my mouth during sex, his big hand also covered my nose and I thought I’d fucking die because he was 1) former BJJ fighter and strong as shit pressing his weight onto my mouth and nose and did not know his strength because he was also a nerdy boy and 2) we liked rough sex and sometimes he couldn’t hear me over his own growls

so… after that, we started tap tap to his arm to snap him back to sweetheart mode lmao

*I am sure many people have nonverbal cues I just didn’t look into them before hastily saying IF I TAP TWICE, LET GO

referencing this series:

⟢Lucifer x Reader x Alastor - The Safeword is RadioApple smut💦

Alastor would give you anything, all you had to do was ask. When you asked for Lucifer, he delivered. But after seeing just how much you enjoyed Alastor’s rough handling, Lucifer takes a turn and gets a little lost in the pleasure.

Part 1 ꒰აMaleReader✧FemaleReader໒꒱ Part 2 ꒰აFemaleReader໒꒱ Part 3 ꒰აAlastorxLucifer໒꒱ tidbit (cute, not smut) Part 4 ꒰აFemaleReader໒꒱✨NEW✨ ₊⊹⁀➴ Lucifer wins⟡Alastor Wins

[spatialwave]

taking aspiration from your ankle, i'm so sorry😭 but... limoreau where jordan or marie have a broken/strained ankle and one of them has to take care of the other (i know they're supers but i'm gonna ignore that lol)

SCREAMING SKFKDDN… if anyone knows a thing or two about bad ankles it’s me.

-

living a busy life as a student and t.a. had left jordan working anywhere from sixty to eighty-hour weeks. there was an abundance of full-time classes, homework and grading papers with most days starting at 6 a.m. and ending at 6 p.m., oftentimes later. they didn't mind the busy lifestyle, though, marie could see under that facade the stress that was beginning to eat them away.

there was an old belief that marie's mom believed in, that sickness and injuries were often the universe's way of telling you to slow down and relax. marie was reminded of that belief once or twice when she was younger and working tirelessly away for her school projects and riddled with stress, only to be hit with a terrible cold that would leave her on bed rest for a couple days.

she always found it to be so odd, why would the universe make you sick if it felt like you needed to relax? there was so much to worry about when you were sick.

then she got older and it began to make sense. the more she let stress eat her away and the less she focused on her well-being — the universe would remind her that she need to learn how to take time to just exist (in a twisted sort of way).

that belief came to mind when jordan had called them early in the morning one day, their heavy breath audible through the phone as they explained to marie that they needed help. a sprained ankle, the last thing they needed to disrupt their busy week.

jordan was mad about it, especially when luke and andre were called by marie to help get jordan back to their dorm. it was so fucking embarrassing, but marie was so damn good at making them feel okay about it. she didn’t hesitate on finding brink and explaining the situation, that jordan would be out of commission for a few days. she comforted jordan’s worries with the old wives’ tale that her mom would say — maybe it was the universe telling them to slow the fuck down. it was laughable at first, but the sentiment kept them from exploding into a ball of stress.

“this sucks, moreau,” jordan was laying in bed with their foot resting on a couple pillows, elevated. they let out a slight hiss in pain as marie adjusted the tensor compression bandage over their swollen ankle, her fingers moving carefully as she murmured a soft ‘sorry’ under her breath, “it’s totally messing with my goddamn routine.”

“it’s been four hours, jordan,” marie snorted through a smile, her eyes looking up at them as she clasped the bandage tight and set the ice pack back on the injured joint, “give it a few days and you’ll be back to being jitter bean’s most loyal morning customer.”

jordan rolled their eyes away from marie with a huff, trying not to let her teasing remark actually make them smile; they were back to feeling frustrated about the situation. with another dramatic huff they readjusted themselves on the bed, reaching behind them to try fix the pile of pillows they were laying against.

“let me,” marie murmured, quickly moving to jordan’s side and motioning for them to lean forward so they could fluff the pillows, “is that good?”

jordan sighed as they leaned back, looking up at marie with a sheepish nod. the worst part about the injury was how helpless they felt. being fiercely independent wasn’t going to help this situation. “you don’t have to stay. you’re missing classes.” their voice was soft as they spoke, gaze flickering away.

“it’s fine, i told you already. i’ll catch up.”

jordan leaned forward again, “but it’s not the same as-“

“jordan.” marie spoke with sternness in her voice, a hand reaching out to their chest as she guided them back against the pillows, “it’s fine.”

a disgruntled sigh came from them, but they didn’t fight back. jordan forced themselves to relax against the pillows and lifted a hand up to rest over marie’s, grabbing it gently so they could bring it to their lips and press a chaste kiss over her knuckles.

“thank you,” they murmured against her skin, “i’ll make this worth your while once i’m back on two feet.”

marie giggled, pulling her hand from them, then walked around the bed so she could let herself collapse beside them, “oh, yeah? a morning jitter bean coffee date?”

“fuck you.”

“kidding!” marie laughed harder now, moving to rest up on her elbow so she could have some height over jordan while she composed herself, “just buy me a nice dinner and we’ll call it even.” she said as she lifted a hand to their cheek, thumb brushing skin.

“okay,” they whispered, smiling as they nuzzled their face against her hand and appreciated the physical affection for a few moments. guided by the heat of the moment, jordan moved their body towards marie so they could press their lips together, but a groan followed right after when they twisted their ankle in an unfavourable position, “fuck.”

marie pulled back slowly, the hand that was on their cheek was on their chest once more, guiding them right back to where they were, “easy now.” she said as she tried to fight off a smile, “we can do more of that in a few days.”

“this is fucking torture. the universe fucking hates me.” jordan breathed out, running their hands over their face.

“it doesn’t hate you. it just wants you to remember to take care of yourself…” marie murmured, “or to at least remind you that i’m here to help.”

jordan watched as marie tucked herself neatly against their side, remote in hand as she moved her attention back to the television they’d been watching earlier before marie rewrapped the ankle. they admired her for a few moments, easily reminded that they’d be losing their mind if she wasn’t here.

“just try to relax, okay?” she spoke up, tilting her head back to meet jordan’s gaze, a small smile adorned on her lip, “and let me know whenever you need something. don’t be stubborn.”

jordan’s lips cracked into a smile and they could feel their heart flutter in their chest. “i love you.”

“i love you too, dork.” she giggled.

[yanderederee]

Rest,

tw: mild self harm. Comfort post tho.

~~

Baji gave you a pitiful look as tears streamed down your face. Stone solid and eyebrows furrowed. Silent.

“You’re overwhelming yourself-” he started in, but so over hearing the same things over and over again, you practically scream back. “No shit! I can’t catch a break! I literally have nothing to show for all my hard work I’ve done! The phones won’t stop ringing! I hear them in my sleep, Kei!!” You cried, shaking from the anger and stress that’s build up all day.

“I’m literally working my ass off and there’s no quantifiable measure of it!” You cried into your fists, accidentally allowing your muscles to take over when one of those fists came crashing down against your head.

“What the hell stop that!” Baji yelled back, going to grip at the offending fist. But now wasn’t the time. You pulled your fist away from his grip and screamed with all your pent up feelings. “It’s such bullshit! I can’t keep a solid strain of thought for longer than five fucking minutes Kei! I’m more capable than this!”

You had tried to run through your coping techniques. Deep breathing. Venting your emotions. Write them down and burn them. Cry. Running through everything you should be doing adding fuel to your demise. For your job, take applications. Render them. Data entry. Return emails. Answer phone calls. Reply to voicemails. Handle walk-ins. Everything. Everything. Everything-

Without realizing, you were hyperventilating while you curled up around yourself. Shaking and crying openly now. “It’s not that hard Kei! I’m capable! I-I can do these things! So why—“ you sobbed harder, your nails digging so deeply into your scalp, until you were pulling on the strands of hair beneath.

“It’s okay,” Baji spoke up in his deep vibrado. He pushed his thumbs into your palms, releasing the vice grip you had on your hair, assessing for any bruising you may have given yourself. “Being hard on yourself isn’t gonna make the work any easier.”

“You’re taking things at the only pace you know how. Too much too fast.” He knew you were about to retort back when your squeezed your grip around his thumbs, but before you had the chance to do that and push him away again, Baji pulled your head in and circled one arm around your neck. “Calm down first, nothin’ good ever came from solving problems in this kind of state of mind.”

The way he spoke was more order like, but it was comforting. There was no room for argument. No room for doubt or disagreement. He was right. There wasn’t anything you could say to take away what he meant. Baji pulled you in close for a hug, the compression against your body made you realize just how overworked your muscles actually were.

“They’ll hire another smart ass to take some of that work load off of ya. Don’t work on getting everything done, just what’s in front of you.” He consoled you with words you used to give him in your youth.

‘It’s okay to be there for Kazu! But beating up Chi—‘

‘You don’t know shit, shut the fuck up’

‘Oh you wanna play it like that?!’

Even if he was stronger than you, there was no way in hell he could push you around like he normally would. Even when you tackled him down to the ground and practically concussed the poor guy with you shaking him by the collar of his stupid Valhalla jacket.

‘You’re being a dick! Burning the bridge with toman ain’t gonna save anyone from anything! Tryna prove your loyalty?! Give me a break! Your acting might’ve fooled those bunch of bone heads, but you can’t fool me, idiot!’

Tears were streaming down your face at this point.

‘Stop it with these dumb back alley tactics! Would it kill you to be honest!?”

Seeing Chifuyu’s beaten up face really set you into a spiral.

‘You. Don’t. Know. Shit.’ Baji tried spitting back, only for your to yell in his face again.

‘I KNOW YOU KEI! STOP TRYING TO PLAY THE BAD GUY! I-‘

You finally stopped your assault on the poor guy.

‘I know you won’t stop trying to save everyone. That’s who you are… B’but damnit Kei..! You… don’t kill yourself in the process.. please,’

Keisuke Baji has never broke a promise with you. Not once. Not after that day.

You were too important to lose to underhand fightings.

“You’re doing enough.”

“Alright, rest” he ordered finally, pulling your entire body out from its seat across from him, and into his lap. “Take a nap. When you feel up to it, we’ll grab a bite to eat.”

“Just stay here and rest. We’ll get through it. Promise.”

[gracebrooklyn]

BODY SAWP

Dabi was hurt to say the least, hawks killed one of his best friends how could he not be on the other hand he didn’t know if hawks was dead sure it’d be on the news eventually but he still didn’t know how bad the damage was. He may be angry but he can’t stop caring for hawks after all, why did he kill twice was the big question and when will dabi see him again and be able to talk with him again say sorry and all that shit that he can’t think cause he’ll have a break down and he’s rather Mr compress and Toga don’t see that at the minute.

He stops, writing appears above his head he looks around to see if anyone else noticed, they don’t seem like like they do so Dabi reads

* BODY SWAP, you shall swap places with the person you hold nearest to your heart * “shit” Dabi says as the count down gets closer to zero. Toga turns to him and he say he forgot something before his mind was not in his own body.

He is lying in a rather large bed in a nice apartment, he turns his head and stares right out a window with a city view, the building looks to be taller then most as he can see a lot of roof tops and clouds. He than noticed red feathers lying next to his head attached to wings, and strand of blond hair falls into his line of sight.

Fuck he was in hawks body well at lest he knew he was alive but damn his body felt like a paper weight and fuuuuuck were these hawk’s feelings he feels like he’s gonna crack at any minute. Guilt, Fear emotions he doesn’t know the names of how does he live like this. He knows where the guilt is from but what could he be fearing,

Hawk’s phone starts ringing on his bedside table dabi turns his body already knowing what to do with the wings somehow. He answers the phone and says this is d- hawks speaking, the person on the other side hesitated for a nanosecond

“ hawks is twice dead “

dabi tenses “ yes “ he manages

“ good, good to see you can still fill you your tasks “

another wave of unknown fear washes over dabi,

“ well is your recovery going good “

dabi somehow knew they weren’t actually worried “ yes “ he replied

“ good we need you back on the seen soon “ of course that’s what they wanted

“ I’ll be back soon “

“ you better now if you don’t have anything to tell me “

dabi stays quiet

“ seems you don’t, I expect you to be back with in a month “

and the other line hangs up. Dabi sighs and rolls over onto his back does hawks have to put up with this every day he and killing twice was a task does that mean he didn’t my want to dabi needs answers.

[nightmarevore]

I Get a Craving and I Wake Up For You

6/?

First | Previous | Next

AO3 LINK.

Rowan belongs to @wonderful-bellies. Luke belongs to me. (Medli wrote half of this chapter! We're going to be writing together from now on!)

Rowan sits alone.

Rowan doesn’t know what’s wrong with him. He can’t let people get close to him, because he’s just going to hurt them. He tries to push his roommate, Luke, away, and things just get worse. He’d hurt Luke. Does he even care? He doesn’t want to hurt Luke, but he ended up hurting him anyway. He knew that the moment he thought of eating Luke more than once that things would go down hill, and they did. 

Oliver called him an asshole. Luke started panicking and shrunk down, unresponsive. Oliver made it sound like he was the cause of that, and he was right. It was ROWAN who cut Luke off and got in his face. ROWAN, who yelled at him and told him he wasn’t interested. He had to lie. Of COURSE he did. If he didn’t, Luke was going to end up just like…

The predator groans, slapping his face and pinching the bridge of his nose. Don’t think about it, don’t think about it.

His predator urges were always so easy to control. They never were so bad. Rowan used to be able to go weeks to a month without needing to bribe someone to be eaten and stay in his stomach for an hour or two. They would never see each other again. 

Rowan lays down flat in his bed, keeping his hands covering his face. He feels so horrible. Like a massive dumbbell is compressing his chest. If he had one with him now, he’d definitely lay it on his chest. The feeling within his chest overwhelmed him. It felt like a heavy, black tar that pumps itself from his heart and into his veins.

He hates this feeling. 

“What did I do wrong?” He asks himself. 

A lot, clearly. 

“For Luke’s sake, you’d best think of an apology. You were being an asshole, and I can’t believe you can’t see how hard he’s trying to make this work with you. The way I see it, you don’t deserve it.”

If pushing people away made him an asshole, maybe being an asshole is okay. 

( No, you idiot! Oliver essentially told you that you triggered him and forced him to shrink like that. That was YOUR fault, and he felt it necessary to use sarcasm. )

But what if he hurts Luke by being open with his predator bullshit? 

He doesn’t even know how he was being an asshole in the first place. He was trying to protect Luke from Rowan himself. How is that an asshole thing to do? 

Could he have been nicer in tone about it? Maybe his yelling is what forced Luke to shift tiny. It triggered something that Luke felt he needed to hide, right? It was something that Luke was hiding from Rowan, just like Rowan tried to hide the fact he’s a predator from Luke.

Oliver said that Luke never tells anyone what he goes through. It’s the same thing as himself, isn’t it? God, it’s like his hunger forcing fugues, isn’t it? His stress forced his body to change size. Stress that he caused. The fact that the predator was responsible for that… 

Rowan, for all his faults, tries so hard to keep himself from hurting people. He was told that the fact he needed to eat people was something to be ashamed of. It would hurt other people. Instead, he hurt Luke just by… well, being himself. Not by being a predator.

Why does the thought of this bring such agony to the man? Why does his stomach churn uncomfortably at the thought? Why does Rowan feel nauseous? 

He may as well dig a pit for himself and fall into it. Disappear and never return. He’d already fucked up this roommate situation. Luke’s going to get rid of him. Oliver will tell him to kick Rowan out, and it’ll be what Rowan deserves. He doesn’t deserve anything nice. 

He should starve himself.

No, No, wait… No he shouldn't. He shouldn’t, because the last time he didn’t feed himself around Luke, he nearly fell into a fugue, and the second time he did fall into a fugue. What was he supposed to do, then? 

Hide the monster, never let anyone get too close and risk seeing that side of him. It was his one rule, his biggest most important rule. It was the first lesson he’d learned as a predator. He is dangerous, he is deserving of punishment in the face of his voracious instincts. The lesson was drilled into his head; a flashing neon sign. Always reminding him in his subconscious that he was a monster and always would be.

So why… Why did it always seem to go so wrong? Hiding this side of him was supposed to keep himself and others safe. Being distant was a necessity, yet the pattern was becoming clear to him. He’d lash out, and others would get hurt. The worst part of it all was one simple fact that pushed its way to the forefront of his mind as he sat alone in the all too quiet apartment. It was because of him.

Him. Not the predator. The predator came through and caused its own problems, of course, but what happened today? What kept happening for years? It was always simply because of him. Not the hunger, nor the fugues. Rowan clenched his fingers hard into his palms as nails sank into his flesh, nearly drawing blood. The revelation pounding in his mind and repeating itself over and over. A chorus of voices, vitriolic and unrelenting.

Rowan was not only a ravenous freak, he was simply a terrible person, as well.And he did not know what to do.

He felt stuck. He felt dirty. A virus that planted itself in one location to wreak havoc upon its environment until it fell apart around him and then moved on to the next. Starvation was not an option, as it would bring out the monster. Isolation was what got him into this situation in the first place. So what could he possibly do? He wishes he could just cease to exist. Erase himself from history entirely. Wipe the slate clean of his presence and avoid so much unnecessary hurt brought upon so many people. His family, his friends, his…

The predator scowls as he feels hot tears trail down his face. He had no right to cry. Oliver was right, this was all because of him. Rowan was dragging down Luke with him. It wasn’t right. He shouldn’t be here wallowing in his own miserable thoughts. He hurt another person, and the thought of running away and ignoring it again was unbearable. The shifter would be back. After Oliver fixed the mess he created, Luke would inevitably come back. Whether it was to gather his things and leave or continue living with his asshole of a roommate, Rowan wasn’t sure, but he would see the brunette again eventually. He needed to be prepared for it. He has no idea what he’s going to do, but he needs to do something.

Fuck, Rowan, get yourself together and fucking figure it out!

The predator slaps his face and clears his throat a couple times. He had to do something. The lump in his throat wasn’t getting any smaller by sitting like this. 

Thinking of a way to say sorry and truly mean it would be a good place to start. 

Thinking of a way to avoid closing himself off and making the same mistake twice would be a perfect place to start.

[sunlightmurdock]

Fair Game | What Happens After | Drabble

Find the full fic here, this is just a thing I’ve had sitting in my drafts for a couple of weeks, for anyone wondering what goes down after Bradley finds them. Is really just a Drabble, under 1k words

Warnings: swearing, cheating, angst etc

…

“Y-Yeah, well you’re fucking Phoenix!” You bite back, still shaking as you sit on the bar stool. Bradley pulls the cold compress away from his eye and squints at you even though it hurts him to do so.

“What?” He scoffs at you. Like it’s the most ridiculous thing he has ever heard. Like you’re stupid for thinking it. “No I’m not! — Why the fuck would you think that?”

You frown. Bradley usually has a tell when he’s lying. Usually he fiddles with his hands, or his class ring. He struggles to keep still. Now, he’s deadly still and staring right at you.

Your head whips around to look at Jake, sitting a while away with Coyote checking that his nose isn’t broken. It might be.

“B-But I thought…” You frown, trying to piece together how this could have happened. “We thought-“

Bradley’s eyes widen angrily. He drops the ice and launches himself up from the stool, glaring at Jake, “What the fuck did you tell her?”

Javy steps in front of Jake and Jake pushes himself up from his perch on the edge of the pool table.

Penny slams a glass down on the bar to catch their attention, “Boys! — Don’t think I won’t call the cops if you start that crap again.”

You stare at Jake. He shoots a glance over to you.

Rooster’s jaw clenches as he settles back down against his stool. He picks up his bag of ice, wincing as he settles it against his eye socket.

“I’m not fucking Phoenix,” Bradley mutters dejectedly, your eyes are on a Jake. You realise that Jake already knows that. “I would never have hurt you like that.”

Your lips part slightly as your heart sinks into the pit of your stomach.

You stare at Bradley.

“B-But - I-I-I thought that…” You tremble, voice shaking as you realise what you did.

Bradley shakes his head as he presses the ice into his eye socket. He knows what you thought. His eyes land on Jake. He knows why you thought it. He just can’t believe you would trust Jake’s word over his.

Jake presses his tongue to the inside of his cheek, still tasting copper from Bradley knocking his head into the dated tile of the women’s bathroom. He can’t breathe through his nose yet because of the dried blood in his nostrils. But, he did get a good hit in and he smirks as he watches the colour of Bradley’s under eye deepen towards purple.

Plus, Jake got what he wanted. Who cares if he won the fight?

“Even if you weren’t fucking Phoenix,” Jake pipes up and ignores the glare that Penny gives him. Bradley stares at Jake, willing himself not to stand up and tackle him off of the pool table. “You were still a shitty boyfriend, dude.”

Bradley rolls his eyes. He isn’t going to take relationship advice from Jake Seresin of all people.

“Do you even like me?” You ask softly.

Javy winces on Bradley’s behalf, turning and pushing Jake’s hair back off of his forehead to check the cut that Bradley’s class ring gave him.

“Excuse me?” Bradley scoffs, raising his eyebrows as he turns his head to look at you. He hasn’t done that much since the fight got broken up and Penny closed the bar so that they could clean up.

“I just…” You swallow slightly, “You’ve been so mean recently, but you’re so kind to everyone else. I just feel like sometimes you don’t even like me.”

Bradley looks between you and Jake, who appears to agree with what you had just said.

“What? — Are you serious right now?” Bradley slams his cold compress down onto the counter and stands up, making you flinch. “You fuck my wingman in front of all of my friends, but I’m the bad guy because I’ve been a little grouchy recently?”

You stare at him as he barks at you. Your lip trembles. He’s right.

“Fuck this,” He shakes his head, “Fuck both of you. You fucking deserve each other.”

You stand up quickly as Bradley heads for the door. Penny grabs your wrist, giving a slow shake of her head. You sit back down on the stool.

[oh-surprise-its-me]

Roy/Jamie prompt: It's the dead of night and Jamie is burning with fever. It's not so bad that he has to go to the hospital but Roy is just a hair's breath away from taking him anyway. Roy's doing all he can, rubbing vapor rub on Jamie's chest, putting cold compresses on his forehead, and just assuring him. At some point Jamie is sleepy and out of it and it's like he's a little boy again and he's talking to his poster of Roy Kent. Roy doesn't even bother to keep the tears from flowing as Jamie tells him how much he loves him, how much he wishes Roy would just come out of his poster and protect him from his dad, and that they will play together one day and be the best of friends. When Jamie is more lucid he's adorably embarrassed, but Roy's having none of that, telling Jamie that it's one of the greatest honors of his life to be Jamie Tartt's man. Jamie of course says he's just as honored.

I live for fever confessions

When Jamie passed out on Roy’s couch he didn’t think much of it. Jamie had been tired all day. What Roy didn’t expect was Jamie burning with a fever.

He had dragged Jamie into bed. That was yesterday. He barely slept last night watching Jamie breath.

Jamie’s fever got worse overnight but his sister said it wasn’t something to worry about yet.

Jamie makes a noise on the bed. “Yeah Jamie?”

His eyes open blurred, seeing but not looking at Roy. “Sorry Roy, I know I should be better. Dad always said be better. Don’t get sick. Don’t be weak.”

Jamie wetly laughs, “I wish you were here, I know I’m a dumb kid and you’re a star but fuck. I wish you could tell me it’s okay. Tell me I’ll be someone someday. Tell me it’s all worth it.”

Jamie closes his eyes again, he sighs back into the pillows. “I wish you could be my friend. Wish you could be here for me. Save me from dad. Hell I wish you could love me.”

Roy watches as he slips back into sleep with tears running down his face. He doesn’t know how he was ever so horrible to Jamie at the beginning.

—

Three days later the fever breaks, Jamie refuses to look at Roy.

Roy is sitting on the bed reading when Jamie starts whispering apologizes. “Sorry I said all that. It was stupid. Fever dreams I-”

“Stop apologizing for nothing baby. I’m sorry I couldn’t save you but you never needed me. You are someone. You’re the person people have on their walls now. You’re incredible Jamie.”

Jamie sniffs. “I can’t believe I said it all to you though. I thought. Jesus. I used to talk to your poster when I was a kid.”

Roy slides down so they’re face to face. He touches Jamie’s face, “I love you Jamie, I’m so proud that I get to be yours. I think you’re incredible for making it through everything you did. If you having my poster made it better then goddamn it I’m glad you have it.”

Jamie is crying now. Hell they both are. Roy leans forward and kisses him. “I love you too. Thank you for being here. I know I get scary when I’m sick.”

Roy pulls Jamie closer curling around him. “Sleep pretty boy, you’re okay now.”

Jamie passes out again, Roy knows they’ll talk more later.

He just hopes he can keep the nightmares away from Jamie.

[dulcedebusse]

Six months on low dose T 🥰🥰🥰

Here is a rambling list of things

General body changes: My waist filled out a lot around months 3-4. I don’t mind it but I do have remnants of the “ugh I’m fat” teenage girl syndrome. My muscles are continuing to grow and get stronger and it’s amazing. I started going to the gym and my lifts have increased in weight significantly from when I last went a few years ago. My body is a little less lean and defined than it was in the very early days but I think I’ve found a healthy point. I have little to no chronic pain and it’s so life-changing I can’t believe how good I feel day to day. I have lost some flexibility and I make sure to stretch to maintain it. My face and neck are more defined and I love it.

Sex drive: So I went on BC to stop my period months like 2-4. The side effects of being dry as a fucking desert, lacking sex drive, and it taking forever to reach orgasm were too much and I stopped. Now that I’m off it, I’m back to being wet and horny and yay! My daily drive is a bit much sometimes but it’s so fun. I also started probiotics and I don’t need estrogen cream or lube much anymore, 10/10 recommend.

Hair: I am noticing more hair on my arms, thighs, and especially stomach. I shave my thighs and most of my stomach because that’s the look I like personally. My arms I leave alone. I started doing IPL on my lower legs, stomach, and uh other places and it’s a total lifesaver for ingrown hairs, itchiness, and just how fucking long it takes to shave. The peach fuzz on my face is thicker and I shave 1-2 times a week right now.

Mental: I’m so much more myself and so much happier. Sometimes I get into fear spirals of being undesirable, sometimes my dysphoria is mega bad. Overall I’m a lot more stable and I think about killing myself about 700 times less per day. Having more energy and confidence is helping me so much. My chest dysphoria has gotten a lot worse but it’s not crippling as long as I wear a compression bra (I can’t stand binding often or for very long). I’m on a waist list for a consult for a breast reduction (sometimes I think about flat top surgery but I don’t think it’s for me).

Voice: My voice dropped a little months 2-4 and it seems to have (probably just temporarily) settled. I think some people notice and some don’t. I notice when singing I can hit more low notes, and that my break is lower. I haven’t lost my upper head range though. I had sore throats almost daily for awhile and I’m glad they’ve stopped for now because it got annoying.

Bottom growth: Maybe a little more since month three but I’m not sure. No more hella growth spurts anyway. I love it and I’m getting used to how it feels differently and how I like to be touched now. How swollen my other parts get around it is also insane and hot hot hotttt.

[rosie-the-posie]

🩷🎀 My DR List 🎀🩷

below is a pretty very long list of all the drs i’ve made scripts for

lmk if any of you want some more detail of any of them, dw i have EXTENSIVE detail on everything babes

don’t judge pls 😖😖 this is a safe space…hopefully 🩷

Fame DRs :

Phantasmagoria DR: my main fame dr where i’m the lead singer in a band called Phantasmagoria w my friends. We’re like, really famous. Like more famous than Taylor Swift famous. And I go on to become a really famous writer/director as well. This is the dr i think about all the time, i fucking rule guys. NO BAD SONGS. NO CONTROVERSIES. ONLY GOOD VIBES AND GREAT MUSIC. ofc i’m an EGOT and pretty much revitalize the film industry single handedly. 😋😘

Heartstopper Cast DR: i’m a part of the cast of Heartstopper (an OC named Vivienne Green - Harry’s sister - who’s besties with the group, helps Elle when she transfers school, and is Pansexual and eventually gets in a polycule). I’m honestly so cool in this one. I have my SHIT together at 19, like, it’s crazy. I’m dating Kit Connor cuz why not, and I eventually become one of the best actors of my generation no biggie 🤷🏻‍♀️

Harry DR 1: yes, I have more than one dr where i’m dating harry styles, who can blame me. I’m a songwriter that met Harry in his 1D days and became one of the band’s main songwriters. We became best friends after that and stayed close. We both become extremely famous in our respective areas in the music industry and are the power couple

Harry DR 2: this one came to me in a literal dream. I’m Harry’s secret fiance that literally no one knows about. My job is solving and rating puzzles (don’t ask me why idk either). I get pretty famous on tik tok for being one of those satisfying accs that people followed during the pandemic yk? Anyways, there’s this whole thing where I’m invited onto the Late Late Show to talk abt my job (Ellen style) and everyone loves me. Harry is just there ig

Harry DR 3 (LAST ONE): OK SO DONT JUDGE ME W THIS ONE. LET ME LIVE. so, basically, I’m Harry’s secret wife and - stay with me here - we have 6 children together. I really only wanted to go here bc I noticed how many tattoos he had of peoples names and i thought, hey, what if those were his kids’ names that he has tattooed on him and no one knows? like, why not? so this is a purely self-indulgent dr where I’m just living the domestic life with Harry Styles and our brood of children. this may or may not have been influenced by a fanfiction series i read

Hozier DR: in this one, I’m Mr. Andrew Hozier-Byrne’s girlfriend who lives with him in the Irish countryside. I’m a seamstress who has my own clothing brand. Think dresses to run through a field of flowers in, or to slowly decompose in a lake littered with petals yk? I end up making the dresses for the Folklore stretch of the Era’s tour. not to brag or anything hehe

MGG DR: I’m dating the one, the only, Matthew Gray Gubler. I just thought it would be really funny and interesting to go to a reality where him and I are pretty much polar opposites. I’m an ex-ballerina who still practices, so I have that grace and elegance around me. I love to dress in dark neutrals all year round. For my job, I’m a famous published horror author. I have an rbf and a WRY sense of humor. Literally black cat aesthetic to the max. And then there’s Matthew who’s a ball of sunshine compressed into colorful grandpa clothes. honestly i love this one

Tom Holland DR: okay so this one is from my Spider-Man phase. But i actually love it so much. I play Felicia Hardy in the Spider-Man films, who is as much of a love interest as MJ in this reality. Tom and I actually grew up together since I would always vacation at my aunt’s house in the UK who was also neighbors to the Hollands. We’ve always ‘hated’ each other growing up (when really we were closer to each other than anyone else) and so when we started working together on the Spider-Man movies, all those underlying feelings started coming to the surface

The Joes DR: Okay, so. In this one, I play Chrissy Cunningham in Stranger Things. Her character is actually a lot different than in this reality where she’s actually secretly dating Eddie Munson behind Jason’s back. She doesn’t die, her friend Angie does, so Eddie and Chrissy join the party to save the world n stuff. Basically, Joe Quinn (his name is Thomas in this reality) and I got really close on set and are rly flirty hehe. And, to make it even better, we ALSO have a thing with Joe Keery as well (hence the name change to make my life easier). So we’re all a budding throuple and we kinda try to sneak that dynamic into the show hehe. note: certain actors aren’t poopy people in this reality and don’t support genocide 🙄) 

Hogwarts DRs:

Draco DR: this was my first ever dr! draco tok got me into shifting. I’m a gryffindor who’s friends w the golden trio. I transferred into Hogwarts in 4th year and pretty much just am there for the ride as the canon happens. I’m in a secret relationship w Draco (shocking ik) and he’s actually not a bad person. i obvi scripted out the supremist in him guys, dw. i actually have so much detail about all the ways we meet up behind everyone’s back and stuff. you never forget your first guys 🩷

Tom Riddle DR: AGAIN. BEAR WITH ME. ITS NOT BAD. basically Hogwarts is more of an elite rich kid college for wizards than a high school type place. BLOOD SUPREMACY DOESNT EXIST. But there is a whole powerful family hierarchy. kind of like a mob family thing??Instead of Slytherins being the ones most likely to be death eaters, they’re the ones most likely to be from those more powerful families. The Riddles are one of the most powerful families (and rich bc sorry but i’m not dating a poor orphan guys). I’m a Gryffindor who transfers in and becomes besties with the Slytherin group (Theo, Enzo, Mattheo -i’m a mattheo truther, never matthew- Blaise, Pansy, and Draco). Anyways, I fall for Tommy bc of his whole dark and broody best friend’s older brother thing he has going on.

MCU DRs:

Peter Parker DR 1: i’m obsessed w the idea of being genius buddies w Peter Parker and eventually taking over SI, so this is that. We’ve been best friends and neighbors since we were little, and got bit by spiders at the same time. I’m Silk, and we fight crime tgt. We’re both geniuses and go to Midtown together. When we meet Tony Stark, him and Pepper pretty much take us under their wings and we become their heirs to SI. We revolutionize the tech industry before we even graduate high school, we’re that smart. example: we build a water filter that we use to completely clean the Hudson River. we create inter-dimensional communication to talk w the other spidey gang after we get sucked into a rift and meet miles. on like a random tuesday too. I absolutely love this one, i put SO MUCH DETAIL into this script it’s actually insane.

Peter Parker DR 2: My first Peter dr that i made, but kind of abandoned. Him and I have an enemies to loves relationship bc after talking w Ned, he thinks the way to attract me is to act as if he doesn’t care about me 🙄. these dumbasses. anyways, i’m Tony’s adoptive daughter who he rescued from these evil scientists who gave me powers n stuff. it was a pretty cool concept when i first thought of this reality. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Stucky DR: Takes place in the 1940s at first, bc I’m best friends and eventually dating Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes. The three of us are a force to be reckoned with guys. I’m super fucking smart, Steve is super fucking stubborn, and Bucky is super fucking protective. So, chaos basically. I’m really interested in science and am offered a spot to work on the super soldier serum by Howard Stark. Canon events become canon, I create SHIELD with my besties Howie and Peggy, Howie tells me he’d been working on cryogenics but needs a volunteer to test it, so I agree. I wake up in 2017, after the Civil War was actually dealt with civilly and am reunited with my loves in the present time. One of my favorites that I ever scripted out. 🩷

Misc. DRs:

Peaky Blinders DR: I was a nurse during the war that took care of Tommy and his brothers, and him and I became really close and fell in love. We reconnected a couple of years after the war ended, and I basically become his right hand when it comes to all the Peaky business. He trusts me more than anyone else because we’re both ass over tits in LOVE with each other. Like, yall don’t understand how in love we are. Also, you know that scene of Elle Woods pulling up to Harvard in a full pink outfit? Literally me every single day. Me in my lil pink blazer and skirt sets and the brightest fucking smile on my face making everyone confused why tf someone is as happy as i am in birmingham of all places. Everyone thinks i’m ditzy and just Tommy’s arm candy when rly im the smartest person in the room at all times. i just love to manipulate people into thinking im harmless and then learning all their secrets 🩷🩷🎀

Haikyu DR: i’m the manager of Karasuno that takes over for Kiyoko. I’m the granddaughter of Nekoma’s coach, so i know all about the game and play just as good as the players. Just because those 4 minutes of him had me licking the screen, i’m Kiyoomi Sakusa’s girlfriend. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH ITS CRAZY. we have a whole friend group with Ushijima, Tendo, Iizuna, Komori, and Atsumu. Imagine the chaos that group brings everywhere. It’s such a fun dr, i should really revisit it more often.

Lloyd Hansen DR: i watched the gray man and this man with his white pants and pornstache burrowed his way into my heart. pretty much im his ditzy lil girlfriend who he adores and just skips around the place in pink and he spoils endlessly. 🩷

Mafia DR: didn’t really flesh this one out, but the gist is that i meet this guy in college and he turns out to be a part of the mob. 🤷🏻‍♀️ and so yeah.

Whore DR: yes, I have a whore dr. hehe. don’t judge me but like, a reality where slut shaming doesn’t exist and you can live out your horniest fantasies w/o any judgement whatsoever. bc that’s completely normal. 😋😋

Sunny DR: this is a better cr one, where i’m pretty much just really fucking smart and in a FANTASTIC AND LOVING relationship with this guy named Peter. He sadly doesn’t exist in this reality 😞😞. But he’s literally the sweetest ever and he’s blond, so I call him Sunny. Like, my sunshine boy ☀️. Literally everything i want in like, a mundane life is in this reality. also, for no other reason than i think it’s so funny, peter happens to be the son of one of my teachers in school. Why? i have no fucking clue 😭😭. like, i go to his house to meet his dad and he’s my fucking history teacher. it’s mortifying but absolutely fucking hilarious.

Criminal Minds DR: i join the BAU after Emily’s whole arc where she dips, and everyone but Hotch and Spencer are a bit prickly with me. I’m best friends and eventually get into a friends with benefits relationship with him (which is so out of character it’s crazy, but let me live). We obvi get our shit together and just start dating and become a power couple hehe

Deity DR: literally thought of this 2 days ago 😭. most of the details are on my prev posts, so you can check those out

Narnia DR: last but not least, I’m a human who was transported to Narnia a few years after the Pevensies saved Narnia from the White Witch. However, I’m instead sent to a nearby country where they take me in and basically make me their crowned princess. After a couple of years, I meet and fall in love w Edmund Pevensie. All Hail Queen Rosemary the Radiant. 🩷

THIS SHIT IS SO LONG TF. I DIDNT REALIZE HOW MANY SCRIPTS I MADE 😭😭😭😭

anyways, if you read all of this i love you 🩷

thanks to @luvieshifts for giving me the motivation to write all of this out

OKAY IM GOING TO SLEEP NOW GN POOKIE BEARS

you are the universe and more, babes 🎀

[chainelunaire]

of people you lied to

pt.1

“listen” that’s the thing shigaraki says to you, snapping fingers right before your face “you need to cut that bullshit, okay? you hear me?”

you kind of do, kind of don’t. head’s too heavy for any thought, had few minutes to sleep this night. so you don’t want to hear what he has to say to you, frankly.

“y/n!”

“stop fucking screaming, jeez” your head hurts so fucking bad, like your scull crushes your brain itself; you don’t need tomura shouting loudly any near you. “what” you ask in a most flat tone.

“have you heard me? what did i just say?”

“don’t care”

“are you stupid?! did you fell off the stairs and your head’s now finally completely fucked?”

“nah”

“seems like it”

“aish, fuck off”

it’s embarassing, really. even if you stand behind the bar, shigaraki near you, and everyone is on another side of the room, actively pretending to be deaf, you still feel frustration and anger. you still caught some of glances from toga - she looks scared a bit, and compress is totally worried. they stand on the other side of the room, spinner’s eyes searching for shigaraki constantly. you don’t really know, if he’s on your side or if he’ll help shigaraki hide the body. if there’s a body at all.

he definitely knows what he’s doing. he became so good at that. putting people on their place, show them how to behave. you’re partly proud of him, actually, because he doesn’t yell how he would’ve only few months ago.

you still want him to leave you the fuck alone. 

and he’s so, so angry with you. you haven’t seen him this mad in years.

“when did it start, huh?” he looks like his usual self, tall and frightening, yet you see right through him. you know how guilt looks on him, it’s like his younger self is still back, changing guilt on anger, on blind rage. whatever works, if it’s better than what he feels in the moment. 

and he kind of overlooked it. your... failure.

“tell me, when did it start.”

“what are you even talking about?” you still play dumb. he hates that game, because you both are not stupid.

he breathes so heavily, you start to actually worry for your life. you see toga coming a bit forward, eyes on shigaraki and back on you. it’s clear that she doesn’t know what to do. jin right back at her, and he also looks lost. you feel sorry. only a little bit, because your brain is still foggy and mean, but you do. 

he takes deep inhale. exhale.

“okay” he says, closing his eyes. “okay.”

“tomura-kun?” you hear someone say. you can’t distinguish who that was.

you kind of fall on the bar table. you take the support to get straight and be somewhat presentable, but there are drums in your ears and you head’s killing you.

somehow you meet dabi’s gaze. so clear, burning blue. no shade of drunk red, whites are so stark bright. he hadn’t said a word since tomura started his little argument with you, and you haven’t seen him, he kind of got lost in the shadows. 

because you’re still not good you can’t clearly tell if there’s a pity or a digust on his face.

what a shame.

“alright then” shigaraki says after a long pause. you sort of giggle when you hear him saying that. your mistake - if you weren’t so hangover you’d see those sparks of pure rage in his eyes. the rage he showed when somebody he believed in let him down.

“get the fuck out of here”

“what?” you smile, still not comprehending what he says. his jokes were always bad. “what did you just say?”

“suddenly sober? good. now pack your shit and get the fuck out of the bar. you’re fired or whatever.”

you’re too dumbfounded to answer. and you start to feel even worse.

“shigaraki-kun, you can’t do that!” toga almost yells, “that’s not fair!”

“i don’t care what’s fair.” 

“we still need a bartender” compress tries to reason with him. “those bars here are shitty, even spinner hates them” spinner looks at him, offended, but says nothing “look, we all made mistakes, but we stick together.”

“yeah! that’s our chance to help!”

“there’s nothing to help here”

you both turn your heads to dabi. he looks bored as usual, maybe tired. you feel anger deep inside, because you know he doesn’t care. what you know, is that he’s a spiteful little bitch, and he, sadly, has a very good memory.

“nobody can’t help y/n because y/n doesn’t want any help.” with how rarely dabi speaks up on meetings, his words are very impactful “you can’t stop someone who doesn’t want to be stopped, i mean, look at any of us. no one else can decide.” he sighs “you can’t change y’n’s mind, it’s not up to you. it’s that easy.”

for a few moments there’s a total silence in the room. you feel not only weakness, but a shame now. why you always feel it near him, that’s what you want to know.

and you want to kill him, so you don’t ever feel that way again.

“don’t listen to that burnt draft of an actual human being” and now tomura looks at you, a bit taken aback, with your usual laid back persona. “he doesn’t know what empathy is. he knows nothing”

dabi smiles so widely, because well. he actually knows a lot.

“what a pretty face you’re showing now, y/n. are you so nice because it’s eye candy?”

“fuck you” you growl lowly “get lost”

“you want help?” tomura asks you, face blank. you chew your lip. “that’s what you really want from us?”

“i don’t know” you answer truthfully. “maybe”

“okay” tomura says after inspecting you for a few long minutes. “i’ll take that as your promise to get better. we can’t allow ourselves to lose because of you” you hear compress exhaling quietely, spinner relaxes a bit. dabi’s the only one who doesn’t move at all. “you can stay. but i need a guarantee”

“of what?”

“that you keep your promise. so what should i do, dabi?” he asks, without looking at him directly. 

dabi only shrugs.

“dunno. kinda need to keep it really busy, so you don’t have time or will for anything”

“that we can do”

and before you actually can say something, shigaraki touches a shelf with alcohol bottles right near him. touches with his open hand.

“no!” your scream rings in your own ears, you move forward, trying to stop him, but it’s already late. “please, don’t! please! stop, please!” he only pushed you lightly, so you wouldn’t stay in his way. his decay is so strong and fast this days, he trained it constantly. you can’t even stand up straight, let alone stop him from going in and erasing everything from storage. it happens so fast, you can’t fully comprehend it until the very end.

you watch as the last bottle turning to ash, empty walls, and the faces of the rest of the league. some are shocked, some are afraid.

dabi looks sad. and tired.

“now” tomura says, returning back in the room, clapping his hands “new rule. since this second, no one is allowed to distract y/n. all y/n does since this very day is restoring the bar back.” he turns to you with a smile, oh so cruel “you owe me some money, so i expect only great work from you. we need a bar, right? think of where we get those back.”

and to this, you actually really start crying, here, on the spot. you can’t see toga or jin anymore, you can’t see anyone clearly. your heart hurts now, when you think of a really expensive collection of wine which kurogiri brought here, of those bottles he showed you, which were the special ones, you didn’t touch them even when you were so drunk you couldn’t remember your name, yet you could name the year those were bottled. 

shigaraki hurt you in so much more ways then one with this. you can’t bring anything back. you’re weak. you won’t be fine.

you wipe your face and look him in the eyes - now big and shocked, because it has been years since he saw you crying. you see yourself in it - so weak and down, so miserable. he looks scared of what he’s done to you. you see his hand extending to you, and you snap back without even thinking. 

i hate to do this to you, but i hate to see you like this more.

you’re able to stand straight now, any fog in your brain is gone.

“as you say, boss” you whisper, barely audible. “anything else?”

nobody answers you.

you get out, and before you go through the door, you feel something warm touches your hand. there’s a lot of things you can imagine now, so you choose not to think of it at all.

*

“need help?”

“no”

“i think you do” toga replies carefully. then takes the cloth from your hand. you just take a new one.

“y/n please let me help you”

“shigaraki will be angry, toga-chan” you say quietely. “go do your things”

“you rarely talk to me these days. i almost never see you. i don’t blame you, you now? none of us.”

she’s the sweetest girl you know. so wise, so thoughtful of those she loves. you once let her bite you, and she let you go really easily after. she looked a lot happier though.

you don’t understand people sometimes.

“i know” you agree, because what she says is true. everyone tried to help you one way or another. it was still on you, to get it all restored from a 0. and you feel that pain in your chest constantly since shigaraki destroyed the bar, you can’t get rid of it that easily. you want to get drunk so it would be easier, yet you can’t. you know shigaraki well; when he sets his mind to something he’s like a dog on a hunt. he would find everything. he’ll know. 

toga glances at you cautiously last time and disappears. there’s only an old music player, few dirty tables and you in the bar now. you feel almost at peace when you don’t think of your loneliness, of how you don’t have anyone to really talk to now. you don’t even have alcohol. your last resort.

“i know we’re kind both hate each other, yada yada” you hear a voice, and snap out of your thought immediately. “yet i wanted to say, i didn’t snitch on you”

“that’s exactly what a snitch would say” you answer tiredly. you don’t have anything in you to fight dabi right now. you have enough on your shoulders already.

“you left too many clues, he was quick on that.”

“great”

“it looked like he knew what to look for” he continues, carefully studying your face “we all knew you’re his favourite, yet i didn’t know if it was to that extend”

“isn’t miraculous?” you ask, “to be his favourite? i mean look at me” so much sarcasm in your voice, his face turns blank.

“and here i was, wondering if the two of you were fucking”

“not right now, clearly”

he scoffs and finally shuts up. you continue to clean the tables, jazz music relaxes you a bit, even with dabi watching your every motion.

“why were you drinking so much? and alone?”

“why you asking? you never cared about anyone in league, not from what i remember”

“i don’t say i care. i’m just curious.”

“well fuck you and your curiosity then” you reply easily. he laughs lightly.

“maybe my curiosity can help you”

“you’ll help me even more? how generous of you!”

“i’m serious” you don’t like his tone and calm attitude, you don’t like anything about him. “if i were you, i’d listen, because you’re doing everything wrong”

“you listen to no one.” and it’s laughable how it’s him who lectures you.

“i listen to everyone.” he argues calmly, and maybe he’s right, you remember that he’s always there, he’s just always silent. “it’s just i find it pointless to speak to some of you sometimes”.

“oh and now’s not the time”

“no. it doesn’t hurt to talk to somebody from time to time”.

“it may hurt someone you talk to.”

“maybe it’s good for them.”

“maybe. and maybe it’s easy to handle for somebody as strong and scary as you, but we’re not all that, you know?” he looks impressed, because now you look as calm as you were before all that, cool head and shit, except that now you’re mad as hell. “some of us are simple people trying to get through it, so i’d be thankful to you if you wouldn’t shit on my cake every once in a while.”

“oh shit” he laughs, looking at you in amusment “i look scary, sure, but do i look strong to you?”

you nod, somehow resistant. then you remember him fighting geten. how he’s always avoiding big battle.

he’s strong. and yet, that’s not all to that.

“think of it” he says, leaning closer to you “what fears you more - not being able to drink some shit ever again or just not drink today?”

“first” you say quickly, becuase when he said it, it actually left you breathless. the thought only is scary as fuck. not being able to do anything ever.

“so just don’t do it today. it’s really easy, when you get a grip on it. i do the same shit, if you ask me.”

“what do you mean?” 

he grins.

“i just won’t die today. that’s what i say to myself every morning. works pretty well, as you can see.”

you see his scars - now in all it’s glory. raw, bleeding stitches, burning and rotten flesh. you never thought of it, yet it was always right in your face. you feel like an idiot.

and when you finally chose what you want to say to him, he’s already gone.