#and having a specific tangible example like 'this person took the time to be kind to me when i was at my least sympathetic' helps a lot

[monstermoviedean]

thanks for being nice to me <3

[thecomfywriter]

What's the wackiest worldbuilding rule you included in any of your high fantasy stories? Have you seen other authors do the same or something similar in their works? Would you want to see your writer friends and acquaintances do their own spin on your idea?

🎇 Wackiest Worldbuilding of TNV 🎇

navigation post preorder my book! buy me a ko-fi? discord! ToV community!

Oooo another fun ask from Satoh. Sorry this took so long. Work, womp womp. I'll have i queued to release soon though so it's not TOO postponed.

It’s not wacky per se… but i like to create mythologies, maps, geographical contexts/weather patterns, and history for everything that happened before the book started.

is it a bit intense? maybe. but it’s so fun.

i know a lot of authors like to do this, so it’s nothing really unique. so i guess I'll actually choose something a bit more specific to each book down below 👇

｡ ₊°༺❤︎༻°₊ ｡

ToV:

People own “domains” within the Dream World, each of which is unique to the other. And if they are an Arcanic, they can learn to “build”/“seize” a domain within the Arcane World.

The entire domain lore is genuinely some of the fun parts of the ToV lore. The idea that dragons try to replicate their domains in the tangible world of Elayza, which is why they build their dens the way that they do. Or that if you die within the Arcane World, your mind becomes tethered to that domain while your body calcifies, keeping you just alive enough to be a vegetable in real life, which living a groundhog day of suffering in the Arcane World.

And, of course—can’t talk about domains without talking about mental domains. The parts of a person’s mind that can shrink into and exist in without leaving, or invite others into as a telepathic connection or mind link.

I haven’t seen many authors do the entire domain thing, to be honest. But maybe I’m just not looking close enough.

LotF:

The idea that all magic sings and exudes a certain colour of fog invisible to the naked eye.

It’s tied to one of Evan’s unique ability of being a Singer with Artist Eyes. He is able to hear the songs of magic and see the colours of the specific spell before the effects of the incantation are fully formed. That includes with telepathic and telekinetic magic as well.

OH also! The ability to condense one's genetic code into a single string of Aura, or the magical specialty of trapping people in the labyrinths of their own mind.

It’s not the wackiest, if I’m being honest. But it is one of the less spoiler ones.

the mind labyrinth one might be common. i know i’ve seen some form of it in books featuring telepathy, like kotlc for example (my middle school self’s JAM). but i feel like the execution is different idk.

TIS:

The souls of the dead pass away into a river; and whatever the river feeds becomes the host of the dead.

The sun and the moon stones of the earth/soil you were born on determining the supernatural you are.

The "time-stealing" forcefields around the colonies that alter trespassers' ages.

THE SENTIENT HOUSE OF KEYS.

The lore behind the Cult of Hedon and their origins...

Bro, I could go on, but I’m not explaining ANY those ones in any more detail than that. Too many spoilers. But I definitely haven’t seen anyone else do these ones before.

I would be curious to see how other’s execute these tropes, but a part of me is also excited by the idea of having it unique to my stories. Nevertheless, if they already exist, I’d love to see how our execution differs.

｡ ₊°༺❤︎༻°₊ ｡

Thanks for the ask, Satoh!!! :)

Happy Writing!

(tagging the TCW crew for the lore drops. interact with the post linked or dm to be added)

TCW Crew!

*interact with this post here to be added to the list :)

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@kind-lion @mysticstarlightduck @agirlandherquill

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@thelovelymachinery @kaeru483 @leahnardo-da-veggie

[actualbird]

Luke Pearce and Conditional Faith: When Does A Skeptic Believe (or When Does He Want To)?

wc: 1.4k

obligatory disclaimer that these are just my own thoughts and interpretations. spoilers ahead for: SSR Shape Of You (the summer breeze card), SSR Overflowing Thoughts (the sott card), SSR Twinkling Eyes (the skadi card), and Main Story 9. 

Luke is a skeptic. 

I feel like anyone who is familiar with his stories knows and fully accepts this fact. While he’s a very emotional and warm guy, when it comes to like, his general view of Reality, he is the type of person to believe more in facts, science, evidence, tangible proof, and empirical explanations. A lighthearted example of this is in Luke’s Sweet Chapter Personal Story 3, where he and MC were investigating that abandoned school that everybody said was haunted by spirits and Luke calmly proved that it was nothing more than faulty circuitry. And in the same scene, MC fondly remembers how in their childhood, when other kids were telling ghost stories, Luke would just exclaim “THAT DOESNT MAKE SENSE” and spoil the fun of the spook. He’s such a STEM guy, it drives me nuts. 

And his skepticism doesn’t just happen there. It pops up over and over across a lot of his stories, and not just in terms of the supernatural. In general, Luke is a skeptic of anything that can’t be empirically proved, including: folk beliefs, spiritual things, the divine/gods.

(sidenote 1: which is REALLY interesting given what I brought up in a previous analysis I did about Luke and Catholic Guilt. Like, so much of his mental framework and morality is something very familiar to the kinds of ways-of-thinking you’d see in this religion. And yet he’s not religious. god gives the biggest ironies to his most skeptical soldiers, or something).

So he’s a skeptic, that’s clear. 

Except it isn’t, because there are times when he does believe in faith. Or wants to believe in it. And these moments are made so striking because of Luke’s general disposition towards skepticism, which is why I’d like to do a deep dive of When Luke “Skeptic Extraordinaire” Pearce Decides Or Desires To Believe.

(sidenote 2: just a disclaimer, all folk beliefs, spiritual things, the different kinds of divine/gods are all obviously very different from each other and I’m not saying that they’re conflate-able, DEFINITELY NOT, but just that in Luke’s stories specifically, they Do serve the same purpose to him; they're something he doesn't believe in)

But before I go into when he Decides Or Desires To Believe, I wanna first tackle why he Doesn’t.

The first reason for why Luke is a skeptic is just his general inclination towards empiricism (things are proven via experience and experimentation) and rationalism (things are proven through logic and reason). Like how it happened in the abandoned school scene I mentioned before. And it makes sense for Luke. He’s a STEM guy, but he’s also a detective. Proof matters, and proof creates reality. 

But another reason is more personal. Sometimes Luke doesn’t believe because of a sense of Betrayal mixed in with a “Fuck It, I’ll Do It Myself” mentality. 

In SSR Overflowing Thoughts, the AU shows Luke originally being trained to be a temple priest while MC was originally trained to be an assassin. But after seeing the sheer suffering MC had to withstand day after day even after praying to the for a peaceful life, Luke took her place and then later remarks “If gods truly exist, then why didn’t they help you despite all your prayers?” and in the flashback, he says “If she dies one day during training [...] then I’ll stop believing in the gods.” 

Here, Luke’s non-belief is due to what he expects higher powers to have responsibility over; taking care of good people. While this card is an AU card, I think it still carries over to regular-Luke because of Luke’s very strong sense of morality, of good and bad. If higher powers are good, but they allow bad to happen, then they can’t be good, or they must not exist in the first place.

So someone else has to do it. In SSR Overflowing Thoughts, it was Luke who saved MC, not the gods. And in SSR Shape of You, during their childhood, Luke had gone missing during the festival to seek the Land God to make a wish to erase himself from existence because Luke believed he was a burden and was robbing MC of the love of her parents buuuuut in the present, Luke remarks that he himself will be the one to repay all the love he had robbed her of.

In a way this is an honestly pretty noble kind of non-belief. There’s a cynical aspect to it, but Luke doesn’t just go “gods aren’t real, cowabummer”. Instead, it’s more like “there are no gods to do the good we want to see in this world, so we have to do that good ourselves.” 

So those are what leads to his non-belief, which is 99.9% of the time. But the few times he does the opposite were interesting because Luke only tends to do it under two circumstances.

1) I Want To Believe In This Because I Love You

Two cards I wanna talk about here: SSR Twinkling Eyes and SSR Shape Of You (again, not sorry, this card is so important to this post and also to mE PERSONALLY AHVKHS). 

In SSR Twinkling Eyes, Luke was his usual skeptical self at the whole local faerie folk beliefs up until Peanut’s messing up that faerie house meant that under the belief system, misfortune might fall upon MC. 

In SSR Shape Of You, at the very end of the story, he releases lanterns that are all wishes for MC’s benefit.

In both these cases, whether or not he truly believes or simply Wants To is up to debate, but it is clear that he does ascribe to actions under something that requires faith due to his love for MC. 

What happened to Luke the skeptic? He’s still very much there but there’s caveats now. He’ll ascribe to a degree of belief if it means keeping MC safe, if it means ensuring her safety and happiness in the future. Which is so fucking sweet and tender, fucking hell, Luke “I’ll give the divine a chance if only for you” Pearce, OOOAAAUUUGGHH.

But where there’s light, there’s also dark. Because sometimes his reason is…

2) I Want To Believe In This Because I Hate Me

Two stories I wanna talk about here: SSR Shape Of You (this card is a legend, mentioned 3 times in this post alone…) and Main Story 9

In SSR Shape Of You, the entire reason Luke even looks for the Land God (thus implying that, if even for one night, he did believe in the god) was due to self-loathing. He saw himself as a burden, he wanted to wish he never existed and that nobody would remember him because he was convinced his mere presence caused bad.

In Main Story 9…..hoo boy, Main Story 9, HAHA. At the very end of the chapter, we see a flashback where Luke—a little bit after the mission where he was the only survivor—has this exchange with Aaron

Now, it could be argued that this is more psychological than it is spiritual (this whole thing smacks of unaddressed PTSD, after all) and while that Definitely is a factor, it’s key to note the language used here being specific: spirits, gods, believe. 

And why does Luke want to believe? Why does he wish it was real even if his usual inclination is skepticism? 

Because he’s guilty. He’s so guilty. And you only ever feel guilty when you think you’re in the wrong. You only ever apologize when you think you’re responsible for wrong.

He wants to believe because he thinks himself a sinner and that only afterlife can grant him a chance at absolution.

That’s the flipside of his belief. Either he loves another so much or hates himself too much. 

So like, now that we’re here, what does it all “Mean” then? Ehhhh nothing much tbh jHVKJ. It just Struck Me. It’s just something I really liked seeing because it’s such a genuine and human kind of ‘hypocrisy’; no matter how rooted in reality we are, when we’re driven by intense emotion (positive OR negative), we’ll grasp for more.

More what? More Anything. More answers, more possibilities, just…More. Sometimes intense emotion makes Just Reality feel like it isn’t enough to explain or address whatever we’re feeling. 

When Luke is pushed by his devoted love or by his intense self-loathing, the limits of tangible empirical reality just don’t cut it. He’ll believe or want to believe in something more.

[deusvervemakesgames]

Project RBH Devlog 0001 – Finding Direction

There were some real-life complications that means this Devlog doesn’t have quite the progress that I would like, namely how long it took me to get feedback on my experiments. 70 mph windstorms can do that, apparently. The good news is that nobody was harmed, and damage was minimal.

To recap, I found three possible directions for Project RBH, and I promised to settle on one of them and write up a Game Design Document (GDD). And I have reached my conclusion from probably-not-extensive-enough playtesting.

Project RBH will involve the player starting out with a basic attack that they steadily upgrade over the course of a run, until by the end they are filling the screen with bullets like an angry god.

So the next step is writing out the GDD to make sure that the game actually reflects this idea.

I touched on it last time, but I feel like there’s more to say about GDDs and what makes them such useful tools for game design and development.

Conveniently, Game Maker’s Toolkit recently put out this video on means of analyzing games which ties directly into this subject.

The short version of this video is that a game’s systems and mechanics lead to dynamic interactions with the player(s), in turn coloring their emotional response. For example, a game where you have big guns and lots of bullets will probably make you feel like an unstoppable action movie hero, while a game with limited ammunition and powerful enemies will make you feel disempowered and cautious.

The GDD is a way for the development team and the designers to coordinate the systems and mechanics to steer the dynamics and achieve the desired emotional response. It’s an incredible tool for focusing design and development to a single, sharpened point. A way to ‘fail faster,’ so to speak.

Failing Faster refers to the practice of constant iteration as quickly as possible, in order to achieve more feedback and learn from the parts that don’t work. It’s the entire reason I threw together my current prototype even though I haven’t done my GDD yet. And yes, the GDD itself can be used to fail faster. Getting ideas out of your head and onto the page forces you to think of how to communicate those ideas, and gives you something tangible to show people and receive feedback on.

It's a way to prevent Perfect from being the enemy of Good.

But what’s included in a GDD? Yes. Yup, that too.

I’ve still got a template from my college professors while I was getting my degree in game design, and it includes:

The World,

Intended Audience,

Unique Selling Point

Multiple sections on plot and characters

Means of narrative progression

Locations, Layout, Maps

Intended Gameplay Experience

Enemies

Combat

Obstacles

Items and Equipment

User Interface

Art Style

Music and Sound

Among several other things.

As you can see, it’s a lot. Luckily, it’s divided into sections which makes it a heck of a lot easier to get through, especially because I don’t need to write an entire essay per section. The GDD is a living document, meant to be edited and updated throughout the lifespan of a project. I also won’t necessarily need every section.

This does, however, lead us to our next problem with the design. Story.

I’m the kind of person who really likes narrative in his games. Traditionally, Roguelike/lites are not known for being exactly narrative heavy. The cyclical nature of dying, restarting for zero, dying again, repeat, doesn’t always lend itself to storytelling.

Luckily this is a problem that has been solved multiple times. The recent Hades, for example, turns that very thing I listed as an obstacle to storytelling into a vehicle to drive the story forward. Heat Signature gives each of your playable characters a motivation; a specific goal they wish to achieve before dying or retiring, letting the player craft each character’s narrative through their successes and failures. Cult of the Lamb has a narrative explanation for your immortality and your runs with a plot that continues through the whole game, albeit a simple one. And, of course, the Mystery Dungeon games have been telling stories with roguelike elements for a long, long time.

The issue is not that it is impossible to tell a story in this kind of game. The problem is that calling my budget ‘shoestring’ is a gross exaggeration. Having a simple excuse plot like the one in Orbital Bullet would dramatically reduce the development time of Project RBH.

On the other hand, making this game the way I am is already enough of a pipe dream that it might be worth going all-in on it.

So that’s where things stand at the end of Week 1. Next week I’ll be checking in with the progress of my GDD, and deciding how and where to start actually making this thing.

Until next Devlog!

-DeusVerve

Special thanks to my Tier 3 Patron Haelerin!

Support me on Patreon

[eriisaam]

You can probably guess what inspired this, but what I'm about to discuss talks about a pet who passed away, bullying and harassment, and fandom discourse esque drama. If you're at all sensitive to any of these, it may be best to just skip this post entirely. Don't worry about it. The long and short of it is I'm just venting. Hope you have a good day.👍

---

You've all probably seen what happened with that cat poll between Jellie and Nefarious Anglerfish by now. Even if it's been a bit since, with it coming up again, I still can't shake off some lingering resentments of this being one of many examples of something I've seen and bottled up for a while now.

What the fuck happened to us? To fandom lately? What the fuck made enjoying things and letting other people enjoy things and liking or disliking certain things that turned into some kind of fucked up litmus test of whether or not someone is an appropriate target to just turn off all senses and be a complete asshole to them?

And over nonsense things like liking something someone else didn't like, or thought cringe, or thinks is overrated, or whatever. What the fuck happened to "cringe culture is dead"? And when did it evolve into "This person is ok to completely shit all over cuz they like Roblox/Minecraft/Undertale/Among Us/whateverthehell and that's cringe"?

No, dipshit, you're still an asshole whether they or you like those things or not.

Like, I'm sorry. I hate drumming up this issue when at this point the issue is long since done, the dust had settled, and that OP of that poll straight up fucked off.

But what gets me is how easily someone can "unperson" someone else - just shut off their brains, remove all empathy and common sense, and say the most horrendously cruel shit without a second thought - treating them like they don't have feelings and it doesn't matter if they do anyways, and over what?

Cuz they play Minecraft and you don't? They like something you think is stupid?? And you make fun of their loss of their cat for "milking the attention away" with their death and derailing attention from another cat in a fucking poll nobody's going to give a shit about by the end of the week??? Cuz the "cringey minecraft player"s cat died at a time too inconvenient for your poll?!

Fuck you. I said it before and I'll say it again: fuck you.

Back when I was way younger, what's now happening to Minecraft used to happen to a lot of things.

Back then? It was liking cartoons in general.

Then it was liking anime specifically on top of liking certain cartoons.

Then it was liking the "lame" (read: "girly") anime like Cardcaptor Sakura, Fruits Basket or Sailor Moon over the badass ones like Dragonball Z, Gundam or Cowboy Bebop. There were constant rotating fights of which anime was "cool" enough not to get shit on for liking it. (And there's still that shit even to this day, let's be real.)

Then it was liking Pokemon. Then it was liking Digimon. Then it was Yugioh, or Beyblade, or whatever. Then there's being a furry. Then it was being a brony or even tangibly liking My Little Pony. Then Undertale. Then Steven Universe, or She-Ra, or whatever the fuck else. Sometimes it's just the one thing. Other times it's an entire genre.

On and on and on the goalpost will keep changing when the old "cringey" thing stopped being an acceptable target, and there's a new thing people completely unload on without a second thought.

Like I said before. I used to be a pet owner. I've had, and lost, pets over my lifetime.

Back then I would've also been in that camp of "easily acceptable target cuz people who like pokemon/digimon/anime are losers who deserve it", and I've been on the receiving end of that shit all my life in and out of fandom circles back in the day.

When I lost my cat, it already devastated me. And I can't imagine the kind of way that pain would've magnified if I was still trying to cope with that, tried to find escapism just hanging out online or browsing or whatever, and someone took my loss to make fun of me about it cuz I was some cringey loser who liked pokemon, so they felt I deserved the kind of words that they wouldn't dream to say to the face of someone actually "worth respect".

Because how dare my cat die on a date that inconvenienced them and ruined their good mood. Some cat nobody gives a shit about, cuz she belonged to a pokemon fan, and we all know pokemon fans are huge no-life losers who never get anywhere in their lives, amirite?

It didn't have to be specifically Jellie, or even specifically about Scar.

In that moment, I saw me, when I was younger, going through that shit that's the same bullshit then as it is now, and where kid-me would've broke down and spiraled worse than I already had, adult-me wants to drop a fucking meteor on a bitch.

I said unkind things and lost my cool and I'm sorry you all had to witness that. By virtue of this post, I'm sorry you're still witnessing it now.

But I'm just so goddamn tired of seeing it, and that's not even the only time I've seen that shit happen, time and again over similarly petty bullshit. It's Minecraft now for whatever the goddamn fuck reason, but it could be anything next once Minecraft and those who play it stop being cool to bully. I've seen it in public with strangers in passing just as I've seen it thrown in the face in private at people I know. I've seen this shit thrown at friends just as much I've still had it thrown in my face time and again.

It never fucking ends.

Why is the message always "it's ok to say whatever the hell I want, as long as they like something that's cool now to shit on them over"?

When did we somehow stop caring about "If you're being a thoughtless asshole, I don't care if they like [insert acceptable cringe target here], you're still an asshole."?

[fadecrow]

This is just a vent if you come in here yelling at me I’m just gonna block you because I’m not gonna tolerate that shit here if you don’t like what I’m saying, just block me, close the page, hide the post, whatever. Constructive criticism is welcome, but you’re not allowed to be harsh. I can’t deal with that shit.

But I wanted to have a textual acknowledgement for memory reasons that in my experience, people like to talk big shit about oppression dynamics and the way they intersect until the point where they intersect in a way that makes them uncomfortable with the implications attached to how they’ve been treating people.

Like as an example, people like to talk about how oppression dynamics can compound the way people experience things. What they don’t like to talk about, and I’m sorry if I word this wrong but I don’t know how to say it in The Correct Way, is how they can make things a little bit fucky when you’re trying to figure out if oppression is even happening. Kind of like how some disabilities conflict but instead of being just disabilities it’s everything. You have a dynamic that is supposed to be oppressed vs oppressor yaaay punching up, BUT because of the way that it is people just get hurt.

For example, sex positivity and open sexuality is very important in order to kill shame, but there are also people who are sex repulsed and don’t wanna hear about fucking. This just kind of ends up with shame being thrown around on both sides of the argument and no one coming to a conclusion about how to accommodate both important things.

Or someone might have a symptom of a disorder that is very uncomfortable for one person to be around for one historical reason or another, but in all honesty, the symptom isn’t actually causing tangible harm. It just reminds someone else of the tangible harm they’ve already been through, and so they decide to take it out on the person who has the symptom. (Like certain disabilities that make you curse in public, etc.) When the person with the symptom tries to defend themselves because the one who is uncomfortable suddenly attacks them, the one who is uncomfortable leverages the idea that you’re not allowed to tell someone whether or not you’re hurting them, completely glossing over the fact that they aren’t in any danger to begin with. And then the person with the symptom in trying to express that they are allowed to exist in public without causing themselves unnecessary stress is now the bad guy. Nobody calls the person who was uncomfortable out and tells them maybe they should take a step back.

And I’m not even going to get into people who say silence is violence and that shows up for people with CPTSD or moral scrupulosity OCD, which might be exacerbated by the idea that if you don’t think and say and do things exactly the right way you are A Problem and Evil.

I have personally been told because I didn’t word things in exactly the right way and the person didn’t like how I existed in their twisted up perception of me I deserve to have my mental health tanked every day. They literally said they hope that my symptoms get worse right to my digital face, no anon. And I wasn’t telling them anything mean in regards to them or their family or political party or anything, I was trying to express something that upset me in my own life where I didn’t know how to deal with it in a space where others were also sharing similar situations. Trying to defend myself at all in that space just got more and more people yelling at me and I had to leave that site. (And no, I’m not going to name the site or exactly what the argument was about because I’m not going to go through all that shit a second time. It took hours for me to come back from it mentally, and I had people threaten to find me. I’m done forever talking about that specific difficulty in detail I’m just not going to do it ever again or seek any help for it.)

It’s really fucked up if people don’t exist the right way it’s acceptable to destroy them by dogpiling them.

I don’t know what this is called like social violence or something? Is it a form of gaslighting or a double bind or am I confused? Any way you slice it, it’s unacceptable in my opinion and I don’t understand why it’s so widely accepted in places that are supposed to be progressive.

It makes many spaces too hostile for me to learn in, and half of the time I just kinda have to absorb information from passive things that come across my feed instead of actually trying to seek out my flaws and learn actively because if I say things incorrectly, I only get attacked. Nobody will say anything in my defense and there is no compassion to be found anywhere anymore the way there was when I was a kid. I don’t want them to treat me like a child, but I want them to hold me to the same amount of value they did before if that makes any sense. It feels like now that people think my mind is sturdier, it means I am also trash that deserves to be chewed up.

[izusun]

*hands you an AU dump to hoard like a little goblin handing a small coin to a dragon*

OKAY so basically: after the doctor's visit where Izuku learns he's quirkless (I hc that they went when he was about five n' a half), Inko does a little bit of research on quirks and more specifically on her son's notebooks, learns that he's even more brilliant at quirk analysis than she originally suspected, and (after looking at some not great quirkless statistics) she instead informs Izuku that no, he's had a quirk all along! It's an analysis quirk!

So she updates the quirk registry, and Izuku goes through his life believing he has an analysis quirk, albeit teased for being a late bloomer, but he still can't shake the insecurity being quirkless for that one and a half year gave him.

He does research on all sorts of things, hacking, knife throwing, first aid, and building his own support gear and takes to all of it like a duck to water. He also does research on UA's policy for support gear in the entrance exam (cause surely they've gotta have a policy for non-offensive quirks like Koda and Hagakure) and finds that he can take one with him if he builds it himself. He goes fuckin bonkers.

Anyways: he trains with Katsuki, cause they're relationship is pretty good since Izuku has a 'quirk.' They both demolish the entrance exam. (Also Izuku kinda swears a lot because Katsuki rubs off on him)

Aizawa doesn't notice a goddamn thing is amiss until the battle trials on the second day (he decides to shadow All Might that day), where when he was using his quirk to silence his students while Izuku was rambling, he just didn't stop, as if he didn't notice anything was wrong. It happens again during the USJ.

So at some point during the sports festival, Nedzu (who is now intrigued because of Aizawa's complaining) invites Izuku into his office during a free period and lets him go ham on analysis, all while Aizawa is secretly there erasing Izuku's 'quirk.' Nedzu invites Izuku to be his personal student (making Aizawa go grey), he says yes, and then Nedzu drops the absolute BOMBSHELL that Izuku is actually quirkless. Cue an existential crisis.

(Also Izuku gets captured at the training camp alongside Katsuki because of his "analysis quirk," wonder how well that goes for him~)

- Goblin anon (sorry this one was kinda long)

GOBLIN?? DUDE???? HOLY SHIT I KNEW YOUR AUS ARE ALWAYS PHENOMENAL BUT THIS RIGHT HERE??? D U D E

i misunderstood the prompt a bit but i genuinely don’t know how to backtrack, so here you go goblin. sorry again o(TヘTo)

ok first of, inko taking on a stronger stance to support her son? love that of her. like, she doesn’t say sorry when izuku turned to look at her and cried that he can’t be like all might. instead, she took him in her arms and assures him that he will be a great hero. at first, of course half of it is lip service because she doesn’t know how to help her quirkless boy be a hero, since, you know, heroes need quirks.. (or do they)

and then she comes across a quirkless self help group which rang many many warning bells in her head. what kind of life do quirkless people live when a google research of them resulted in subsequent pages of results like how to stay safe when quirkless, or how to find jobs when quirkless, or quirkless mortality rates?

she fears for izuku, until she notices that her son’s smart. too smart for his age, but inko thought she’s just being biased. but izuku’s wit is something many people notice, for an instance, when izuku goes to the park to play and his friends’ (the few ones who stayed) parents tell her that her son’s smart for a quirkless person, she realizes that izuku’s wit is far more vast than normal.

then a thought worms into her head but wouldn’t it be bad to lie…but also, no one would be any the wiser.

further pushed by all the statistics she keeps seeing, or the lack thereof, about quirkless people, she makes the decision and pours it to izuku.

izuku who’s far smarter than his age and understood what his mom is asking from him. izuku who already saw the disparities between quirked and quirkless people at the tender age of five. izuku who knows what it means to lie about something as personal as a quirk, but realizes that it’s necessary for him to do so if he wants to live a “normal” life.

so he agrees; he tells inko that he’ll work even harder to sharpen his mind, and to keep expanding his knowledge.

when izuku’s quirk file is officially updated, he watches how his peers and teachers revert back into treating him as izuku. he regains his old friends, but he chose to drop them because he doesn’t want to surround himself with people who thought he was less for being quirkless.

katsuki stayed, surprisingly. katsuki stayed and everyday he kept bothering izuku to “get your quirk already!” katsuki stayed because he can’t fathom that the smartest boy in their class (of course not as smart as him, psshh) is quirkless. deku couldn’t be quirkless. (but if he found out that izuku, indeed, is, i wonder what would happen…)

katsuki was one of the loudest to celebrate when izuku announced that his quirk arrived.

“finally!” he screams and bothers izuku about the semantics of his quirk. he really wasn’t surprised to find out that izuku has an analysis quirk because he thought that nothing else would better be suited for izuku.

he doesn’t know that izuku pours so much of his time into learning and studying, often bypassing basics and intros to take more of the developed courses that are usually recommended for older ages. he doesn’t know that izuku is just a naturally smart kid with the ability to fill the gaps of his young mind with knowledge upon knowledge, storing and stacking them until he feels that he’s laid a sturdy foundation for his fake quirk.

then izuku began threading into different areas. he learns how to get into cyberspaces; hacking into accounts and delving more into how to access private information. he doesn’t thread too close lest he gets caught, but he learns the logistics of maneuvering around the web and burrowing in empty spaces to branch out his own. he creates and designs web algorithms for himself, just so he doesn’t trigger anyone who is looking into the web movements. he hones this and uses it to access more information.

then when he deems it enough, he turns his attention to something more tangible and something more physical. he learns other ways to be a hero; how to fight without a physical quirk, how to win against bigger opponents, how to use analysis quirk in fights.

izuku becomes more than a fake analysis quirk user; he creates it.

mental quirks are hard to describe, more so to compress, thus he creates new definitions of an analysis quirk. what used to be a silly lie is now a tangible fact that izuku believes in. because what makes a quirk? because what makes analysis a quirk? he learns these semantics (often political) and uses it to his advantage.

then he finally threads to hero analysis. at first it were classmates he analyzed; eyes running quickly at their forms and watching with great interest before calculating everything he’s seen and transversing it with the things he learned, and bridges these two facts together to create an analysis. it was a struggle at first: he didn’t know which to put emphasis on until he realizes, he doesn’t need to. he weaves them together and lets his analysis run long and watches how his hobby comes into fruition.

following his classmates are current heroes. these were more tough and more fun, and any of the information is less shared. he doesn’t tell his classmates or teachers about his analyses, only katsuki. and katsuki’s breath hitch every damn time at izuku’s talent quirk.

it is in their second year of middle school that midoriya begins to incorporate the facts with himself to create physical performances. the issues and things he learned through observing are now practiced by himself. he calculates the best way to fight with a body as petite as his, often taking examples from pro-hero hawks and other women heroes. their agilities and physicality suit izuku’s young body; he doesn’t see the merit in punching his way through things when he physically cannot.

so he learns ways to ease his muscles. he learns ballet and gymnastics; lets his muscles contort and mend themselves anew. he finds his balance and roots himself firmly, and learns to calculate his actions so he doesn’t waste his energy. katsuki doesn’t say anything, but he sees izuku’s dance and falls in love.

then in the spring of their third year of middle school, izuku learns how to build and handle weapons.

this is the easiest. izuku learns that weapons aren’t tools, but extensions of his arms and hands. they are not to be revered and not to be depended on because they can fail. instead, he learns to wield weapons as though they are parts of his bodies. he learns how to use swords and often narrowing to wooden sticks that can be picked up anywhere; he learns how to fire guns and how to hide daggers in his uniform. he learns that his body is the best weapon to use and that tools are just arsenal to help him win.

then he learns how to build them.

by summer, izuku begins reaching into UA’s servers. they are hard codes to crack, but not impossible. it takes him five days to access old entrance exam videos. the next day, the videos are snuffed and he is left to try digging deeper into UA.

he fails.

nezu must have caught onto his codes and proceeded to build walls against it.

so he slithers out. but a five minute video of last year’s entrance exam is enough for izuku because he learns two things: one, heroes must defeat villains and two, heroes must save others.

izuku prepares for this. unknowingly, katsuki is taught these same principles. katsuki would grumble and tell him that he knows what heroes must do, but izuku continues to hammer it down to him.

by the time of the UA entrance exam, izuku falls into the ease of having a fake quirk. he passes the written exam with flying colours and although it took three teachers to approve his support gears (present mic had to pull in powerloader, midnight, and hound dog to ensure that the well designed support gears are made by the hero student examinee and not by a support student examinee. majima saw the works and begged nezu to allow izuku to be his student.), izuku still succeeds and dominates the entrance exam.

when the zero pointer was released, he had flung himself towards the girl crushed by debris and yanks her out. he doesn’t waste a modified grenade to explode the zero pointer because through his calculations, doing so would not only create more collateral damage, but would also endanger the examinee in his arms because she still would be caught in the crossfire.

nezu hums in appreciation from the screening room, after all, smart minds always do think alike.

izuku gets a whopping 92 in the physical aspects of the entrance exam.

katsuki gets 85.

aizawa gleefully takes them in.

izuku thinks that no one will ever know of his and inko’s secret, but one look at nezu’s beady eyes and he knew that the stoat knew. it became a game to them, then. a game to see who else would realize.

and while izuku is smart, he doesn’t realize that nezu has basically taken him as his personal student the moment he and izuku had created a bet.

it takes two months for aizawa to figure things out. surprisingly, he is the only one to do so and he only realizes due to the many untimely attacks of LoV.

——

how angst would it be if katsuki realizes that izuku’s always been quirkless during their captivity in the LoV’s hideout.

[eponymous-rose]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E127 (March 2, 2021)

Tonight’s guests are, of course, Ashley Johnson and Marisha Ray!

Marisha, on her thought process behind the date: “It was a fascinating study on designing something with another player in trying to navigating how to do that in a way that makes sense and wouldn’t be too metagamey or overly scripted or anything like that. I had a bunch of ideas thought out, then I just typed it out and sent it over to him, and then he interpreted it as such.” Liam had ideas, but Marisha wanted him to keep the details a surprise. The theme of “let’s start over” was the leading motif for the design. Three acts: pre-game cocktails at the Nestled Nook, picnic in a field of Xhorhasian wildflowers, and then close it with after-dinner drinks and hot tub at the Steam’s Respite. And the very last thing was “and all the cats were dogs”. Brian: “What was his response to that?” Marisha: “He texted me and was like, ‘Are you serious or is this dog thing a joke?’”

Ashley is asked what it was like to know it was coming but not know the specifics. “For both of us, I don’t think we thought it was going to be right then. I think because it’s been so long in the relationship between Beau and Yasha and it felt like such a natural progression for the two of them, and they’re both awkward together. I think there was something to just being thrown into it.” She spent time thinking about what things Yasha would talk to Beau about on a date. “We got to maybe one of them. It was just so fun! Exploring romance in D&D can be super weird, especially when you’re streaming. But it felt like that’s where our characters were going. There was that excitement of trying something that is out of my comfort zone, and I think so much of Marisha was part of that, as being the initiator as Beau, where I was like, okay, this is where it’s going it. Let’s do it, let’s see what happens!” She mentions how “fun and freeing” it is to trust your improv partner in something like this.

Marisha: “I just wanted Beau to be a fuckboi!” But she highlights that it’s hard to deny the deeper connections that come up in D&D scenarios. “They’ve been with each other through so much that it’s difficult to deny when those bonds start to happen.” She texted Liam in a panic before the game. “What do I wear? And he said, ‘In the game or in real life?’ Both!”

Marisha was expecting a Sam curveball at some point. “My/Beau’s reaction of ‘I love you!’ was pretty accurate. She does care! She’s not just  a troll trying to ruin our shit.”

Marisha on Yasha liking dogs: “I clocked that shit when you bought a dog figurine.” She keeps notes about all the members of the party when they reveal things like that.

Ashley has started taking more detailed notes, partly to play catch-up for events she may have missed earlier. “Turns out, notes are very helpful and can help you in your RPing!”

Favorite parts? Marisha: “The fade-to-black moment at the very end, and I think it’s because Ashley’s eyes--maybe this is going to get weird--we had this moment where we were in the hot tub at the end, and I looked over and was like, ‘hey’, and you looked over and were like, ‘hey’, and I was just dead. I will never forget the look on Ashley’s face. There was just a pure moment.” Ashley: “That’s so funny, because I was going to talk about this one moment with Marisha. It’s just clicking into the scene and clicking into the moment.” Marisha talks about how the moments associated with the game have real, tangible emotional connections. Brian highlights that the emotional side of things is what you remember the most after the campaign is done.

Character thoughts on Kima? Marisha: “I was like, step on me! Please! Both of you! We’d be friends.” Ashley: “It’s also that nostalgia that feels so good at the table. These characters we know and love are still living and breathing and happy together and just kicking ass. For Yasha it was an amazing example of a relationship that works in this world, and something beautiful that these people who are different but are connecting. It was a lot of-- it was cool. I think Yasha’s a very big fan of Kima and Allura. When she gave over the sword, Travis texted me and was like, it’s the Holy Avenger. Looking it up and talking about it, it was like, holy mackerel, this sword is insane. But there’s going to have to be some conversations had to attune with the sword. But I like that Matt presented that challenge, that this isn’t necessarily in your class, but let’s do some RP and see what happens.”

Where’s Yasha at with the Stormlord right now? “I’m curious to explore that more, but knowing that the Stormlord was the first person to bring her back to her own will, of pulling her out of whatever was happening with Oban and the Laughing Hand for however long. It’s also weird to see the relationship that the clerics have, and I think Yasha’s still figuring out how to be her own person, but also... not serving somebody, but still trying to figure out that relationship with her god. But again, he saved her from a very, very dark place, and I think that’s something she values and holds on to.”

Cosplay of the Week: An amazing Essek! (Blushingvioletcosplay on Instagram)

How is Beau handling the Eyes? “All the theories! It’s hard for it to not feel like a ticking time bomb. I always have to try and separate my theories from Beau’s theories. That’s acting and shit. I, Marisha, am very interested if I can somehow utilize this to our advantage. Beau, also interested but simultaneously terrified that it might be a bad idea and I might just get further initiated. When it comes to Matt, you know there’s always something more lurking underneath all of this. As players it’s kind of our job to navigate that.”

How about Yasha? “I think it’s one of the things that didn’t really come up in the date, which is funny, because it’s something I was thinking about. Me as a player, that’s something I’m extremely stressed about. We don’t know what’s going to happen. We kind of got into it, but I think the fact that Lucien was listening, and the Eyes, I think it made me as a player as Yasha very nervous about interacting with Beau, because I don’t know what they’re picking up on. There’s so much we don’t know, and Lucien is so confusing, and the Eyes, and with Matt... we don’t know! It’s a point of extreme concern for Yasha, especially someone that she has feelings for and cares about, it’s an extra level of I don’t know what this means and I can’t lose this person, but I need to protect at all costs.”

What was it like for Beau to discover that Dairon and the Soul not only listened but took action? “That moment was so deeply powerful. Honestly, I was just as taken aback as Beau was. I never in both mine or Beau’s thought process did I think Matt would take action in that way, or that would ever be handled. And I think that’s what makes it so emotional. You condition yourself to think these things just happen, so much so that they permeate your D&D game. So rarely do abusers get held accountable for their actions. What was powerful about it was that he was, and other people cared. That alone was so emotionally impactful, and I was completely thrown by it. I feel like I had to walk away from that situation kind of unpacking those things. What does that say, what does that mean? Same thing for Beau, where the cycle of abuse has happened repeatedly to her with no repercussions to anyone who’s causing it. It’s why she’s always had a weird tenuous relationship with the Soul. It throws you into these layers of reconciliation and thought. I didn’t think this was going to be addressed. What does that say about society? So many different layers to peel back. It all speaks to so many real-life experiences that happen every damn day to so many people. There’s not many examples in media of abusers getting handled, and especially not in a way that’s not some sort of device to motivate somebody.” She highlights how rare it is that the abuser was handled without pulling the victim into the mess. I’m definitely not doing what she’s saying justice with my speed-typing.

How is Yasha feeling about solidifying her identity as a protector? “Putting together this character and starting to play as her, there was a part of me that wanted-- when I work on characters, you go through the list of questions you have as an actor, what’s your motivation and all that stuff. But I very much wanted to see if I could have a character that doesn’t necessarily know what their purpose is, because I feel like a lot of people feel that way. I think when we see movies or TV shows, there’s always a character who says, I know what my purpose is. I wanted to explore what it meant to not know what that is. I left that open with Yasha, and I didn’t want to set that for her, because I thought that was an interesting thing. I still like that idea, but in the conversation with Beau and knowing the date was coming up, there were a lot of internal conversations I was having of how is Yasha feeling in this moment. At the end of the day, I feel that’s a very solid purpose for Yasha in this moment, of all I can really provide is protection - and of course she can provide more than that. But now I’m just, yeah, I think protection for her is the best way she knows how to describe her purpose.” Brian: “And once we arrive there, the goal is to find a greater purpose, to be of service.” Ashley has tied in Yasha’s protectiveness with her grappling with loss.

Fan art of the week: A second amazing Essek! (by Saturday_sky)

Thoughts on the amulets: set-up or bad luck? Ashley: “I thought they were a set-up!” Marisha: “I think [Astrid’s] an opportunist. But I think it’d be much more convenient if anyone other than her killed Trent. To what end, I don’t know.” Ashley: “Me, personally, how I interpreted her crying in that alleyway, I felt like she was crying because of a betrayal. But I don’t know! I think she definitely cares for Caleb.” Marisha: “I also got betrayal tears. That felt like guilt-crying to me.” Brian: “I don’t like any of this.”

What prompted Beau going full assassin? “If they were to get in and out and I could have jumped over that tower without killing that guy, I would have.” She didn’t have a lot of options as a monk and not a rogue assassin, but needed a quick and quiet way to get him out of the way. “I went through so many ideas in my head. I thought of an idea to dump all of the ball bearings under him, then light fireworks” to try to get him to fall off the edge.

Is Yasha’s hope for Molly still alive? “Yes. I think that because Yasha has been on the other end of doing terrible things under someone else’s influence, she has a lot of forgiveness for people. At this point, of course, it’s hope that he’ll come back or have some type of recognition of his life as Molly. There’s a lot of questions. I don’t think she’ll ever give up on him.” The only moment of hesitation was when Lucien was cool with Gelidon leaving with Beau.

How are they feeling about their odds? Ashley: “I feel really great about the ideas that the group has to get out of tricky situations. This one I’m nervous about.” Marisha: “I agree. We have our little side player thread, minus Matt, and I don’t see how we’re getting out of this without some sort of compromise that’s not necessarily in our favor. I think we’re going to get out of it, but I don’t think we’re going to get out of it completely.”

Ashley didn’t tell Brian about the date after the episode ended, but wound up blurting it out right before he was about to watch the episode for Talks.

[inmyarmswrappedin]

So, because Fatou’s season ends today and, as far as we know, Druck hasn’t been renewed yet, I want to go over the things I feel the team did well in this season and the things I hope they take with them when they sit down to write the next season (which I’m manifesting will be Ava’s).

I think that s5 and, perhaps to a bigger extent, s6, were the team’s attempt to address fan feedback for and criticisms of s3 and s4. So I have hopes that, after possibly the most scrutinized season of any Skams, they are still willing to read even more feedback and sit down once again to craft a couple more seasons (possibly even 3 or 4 more seasons!).

So, without further ado, things that were done well! (Do I have to add “in my opinion”? Do I??)

I liked that for both s5 and s6, the thorough-line for the season wasn’t made obvious or shared in a press release, but rather it was up to fans to connect the story threads for themselves.

I loved that the team sought to address one of the biggest criticisms of s3, that is, that Matteo was given so many symptoms of a mental illness, but it ultimately went unaddressed in the narrative. They did this by giving Nora a dissociative disorder, and Fatou dyscalculia. (Matteo has been headcanoned as being mentally ill and having a disability.) It allowed the teams to develop both fan theories into full-blown seasons and give each of them the importance they deserved.

I have said this already, but I really appreciate that the team chose misunderstood, misrepresented and underrepresented mental illnesses and disabilities. I feel like s5 and s6 will be referents for many years, because they really took the time to portray a dissociative disorder and dyscalculia in a down-to-earth, unhurried way that isn’t meant to shock and awe, but simply allow us to understand why and when Nora and Fatou will struggle. Druck got the viewers to anticipate when Nora and Fatou would struggle, and that’s the first step in being able to anticipate and accommodate the needs of the Noras and Fatous of the world. I really can’t overstate how important this is and what a difference it makes in a real, tangible way. These seasons aren’t meant to be enjoyed for voyeuristic reasons, but they will legitimately help people.

One of the biggest criticisms of s4 was that Amira and Sam didn’t connect as women of color. In fact, it seemed like in s4 Sam was treated as another white friend, when in s2 both she and Amira were the victims of Kiki’s racism. The team addressed this by giving us Ava and Fatou’s friendship, which I want to say might be the first friendship between main characters of color where their race is a substantial reason for their bond. (There are the Sanas with their Jamillas, but the Jamillas aren’t main characters, and then there are friendships like Jo and Megan and Zoya, or Imaan and Liv, or Luca and Yasmina, but iirc in every case their bond as women of color isn’t made explicit.)

Another criticism of s4 was the way Kiki turned into the world’s most understanding white friend offscreen. The team addressed this with the Ava and Mailin storyline, which I think was wonderfully and subtly set up in s5, then built on with the biology test leaked answers.

On the topic of race, I think a major criticism of s3 was that David’s ethnicity wasn’t acknowledged (to the point where a white actress was cast to play his sister gvhvhv). The team has made up for this with Josh (more in the s6 sm than in s5, but I still count it) and with Kieu My. Fatou and Kieu My bonded over being first/second gen children of immigrants, and in doing so, they acknowledged that these characters aren’t white and have different experiences than white Germans.  

The first 6 episodes of this season were some of the finest writing in the Skams. The storylines all connected and built on each other. The motifs were just so good and beautiful and fitting. The themes were all clearly defined and easy to follow.

The tortoise plot was one of the most fun and imaginative storylines in any Skams, it connected Fatou and Ismail in a believable way. And not to rave about a fucking tortoise, but animals can be really uncooperative and that tortoise delivered every fucking clip. Druck has a reputation for being one of the most depressive versions of Skam, but the Maike/Burger plot was just plain fun.

I feel like some of the old gen’s instas were a bit self-indulgent. I’m thinking specifically of Matteo’s memes and how they they weren’t necessarily the kind of memes a gay dude born in 2001 would pick, but someone a decade older. I think this is much better done with new gen. Fatou’s memes reflect her age and her sexuality, and not just that, but Ava, Mailin, Kieu My, Josh, etc. all pick memes and even focus on different aspects of recent news, based on their gender, race, personalities, interests, etc.

I appreciate that the team found a way to fit a sex scene between Fatou and Kieu My to add to the small catalogue of wlw sex scenes on Skams (I’m including the scene in lovleg or we’d only have two lol). While I understood the reasons eskam opted not to include one, I thought there were ways to feature a sex scene that didn’t sexualize the actresses and didn’t require nudity. Cases in point: the lovleg scene, and this scene in Druck.

And it also needs to be said. This is the first original season with a main of color, and the third season overall (after Liv and Imane) where 10 episodes are given to a character of color and no one else. Of the three, it’s certainly the season that loved and respected its main the most. The bar is so low it’s in hell, but Druck did clear that bar!

With all that said, let’s talk about the things I would really want the team to address in following seasons:

The thing I most want them to fix might be small or unimportant for a lot of people, but I think it’s at the core of why the season has been unenjoyable or certain plot points haven’t come across the way the team wanted, for many people. I am talking about the overly expositional nature of the writing.  It appears as if the team approached the writing of the clips with the intention of hitting each beat as noted in their agreed upon outline, and absolutely nothing else was to be added. This is an issue both in s5 and s6. It’s just less noticeable in s5, because s5 is setting up stuff for Fatou’s season, and possibly even seasons that haven’t been written yet. The fact that absolutely every second counts makes for a stressful watching experience for me, because the narrative tension is always heightened. Whereas with Skam, the narrative tension would build throughout the clip. Take the Pride scene in Skam, for instance. The clip allows for Isak and Eskild to get increasingly more agitated as they butt heads. I feel like if this Druck team had done the Pride scene in s5 or s6, the clip would’ve started with both Isak and Eskild already on edge, and cut much of the dialogue that got them there.

On the topic of naturalistic dialogue, this season doesn’t have it. Here is an example from ep 10 clip 2, Wieder vereint/Reunited 11:37.

Fatou: I’ll get a certificate too and bring it over to you. And I checked it, I only have to change one course and my schedule will work.

Teacher: Miss Jallow, you are not the first one to come to me with an epiphany. We could fill entire school weeks with the lessons you missed. In addition, Doctor Steinberg told me about your, well… activities. You don’t have a lot of arguments on your side. 

Fatou: But I’ve spoken to all of the teachers and they said they are okay with it. 

Teacher: You seem to have friends among the teaching staff. Mrs Pavlovic put in a word for you. Okay then, do it and go before I change my mind. [translated by @kieu-tou! Thank you!] 

Like. This is the bare bones version of a dialogue. This should be the first draft, not the final version. The coordinator goes from absolute no to yes, with just one line from Fatou. The coordinator gives reasons that would necessitate more than one sentence of counterargument, like Fatou’s absences and the Biology test leaked answers. The coordinator even says Fatou doesn’t have a lot of arguments on her side, and yet it takes Fatou one line to change her mind!

And of course we viewers don’t want or need a lot of time with the coordinator. And particularly at this point in the season, no one would enjoy a naturalistic dialogue with the coordinator of all people.  But my point is that this is an issue with the dialogue all this season (and last season as well, but this season has been more scrutinized), the reason I picked this example is because of how easy it is to see here.

Which brings us to the pacing of the clips, and specifically the Friday clips. Because the script goes straight to the information the team wants to convey to the viewers, skipping the build up to it, many Friday clips have fallen flat, felt abrupt, and have been, tbh, unsatisfying. Again, I had this issue in s5, but as that season went on, I felt like the team had a better grip on Friday clips. But then they did it again in the first Friday clip this season, and so I think this is something the writers really should work on. The first Friday clip in Isak’s season closes on Isak being sandwiched by Emma and Even on a bench, visually setting up the love triangle, or more accurately, the personifications of who Isak should want to hook up with and who he really wants. But in order to get there, we’re shown a good amount of info, from the way Vilde, Eva and Sana are handling Noora’s absence, to Chris and Kasper, Even hovering around Isak, Emma trying to impress Isak, Isak escaping and, like, draping himself on the walls because he’s so over it all. Isak playing a game on the bathroom to stall for time. The paper towel maneuver to immediately give us a sense of what a weirdo Even is. A conversation between Isak and Even that gives us some clues about Even’s shame, as well as establish interests in common (like weed), and this is all before Emma even joins them! Just think of all the stuff we learn about who Isak, Even, Emma, Eva, Vilde or Sana are as people, before we get to the point of the clip! Fatou’s season simply didn’t have that. Compare it with the first Friday clip of Fatou’s season where the cashqueens quickly talk about the leaked answers, one of the major storylines this season that only gets a couple lines, before Fatou says she doesn’t want to talk about school (Fatou’s struggles with school, another major storyline), and then we’re onto the point of the clip, which is that Kieu My likes girls too. AND FADE TO BLACK. When people say they want longer clips, what they mean isn’t artificially inflate the clip length or add more plot stuff. Just let us watch the characters interact with each other so that we get a feel for how they relate to each other. I know I wish we’d have gotten more of Ava and Fatou interacting with each other before things turned to shit, and Ava with the other girls, so that I know why they all like and value Ava so much. I wish we’d have gotten more of Kieu My talking to the cashqueens about, like, why she didn’t make use of the biology test answers, instead of getting it on a chat. Or food combos they don’t like. So it makes more sense that later on Kieu My actually thinks she and Fatou are friends.  And every line doesn’t have to count. In Skam España, the characters are constantly talking and not everything they ever talked about ended up being relevant. When one of the characters lied about her house undergoing renovations to hide the fact that she was poor, the characters joked about Italian marble and put on bad Italian accents and made that Italian hand gesture. None of this was important to the plot because those renovations weren’t real to begin with, but they made viewers feel like these were real friends joking around, instead of characters needing to hit every storyline beat in a clip.

I have this joke with my friends about Druck always going 🤪🤪 in the last third of every season, in which a season that was very tightly written and cohesive suddenly pulls something inexplicable and pretty much impossible to resolve in 1-3 episodes. Hanna’s season suddenly switching to Mia, Björn creeping on Mia in episode 9! of a total 10, David getting outed in episode 8 and then disappearing for a whole week, Amira’s season pivoting to Mia and Hanna. It has happened in every season except Nora’s, so I thought the team had learned its lesson, but then the forgotten date with Ava happened. To be clear. It really makes no sense that Nora would have hung out with Ava several times since Tuesday, and the topic of the cashqueens being officially introduced to Kieu My wouldn’t have come up. it’s just not realistic.gif I feel like at that point the writing for the rest of the reason became super contrived to keep Fatou miserable and apart from Kieu My and Ava to artificially delay the reunions until episode 9 and 10. Why add a cheating insinuation and the main checking her partner’s messages in episode 8 if you know you won’t be able to properly resolve it? Why make Kieu My mock Fatou’s “uhm” if it’s not going to be addressed in their reunion clip? Kieu My had taken the initiative for a lot of the relationship, so it’s okay for Fatou to take the initiative when it comes to making up. You don’t have to add things that can only be resolved through an expositional info dump. (Please no more exposition than it’s necessary! I think we’ve established that at this point lol.) In the case of Fatou’s season, this is even sadder because I feel like Kieu My’s intimacy issues could’ve been the reason to drive them apart for two weeks, rather than the Maya/uhm stuff. This could’ve also been resolved through Fatou and Kieu My explicitly negotiating their boundaries and how they want to be comforted and how they want to comfort each other, which I thought was the issue with Fatou rejecting Kieu My’s attempts to help while wanting physical touch, while Kieu My didn’t want to be touched but rather seen.  

There are going to be many thinkpieces on why a myriad of stuff didn’t work for people, so I’m going to keep this simple and address one last thing. I think that choosing to focus on Nora’s mental illness and Fatou’s disability is a great choice that doesn’t complicate the themes too much, but Druck (and all the Skams, but I’m invested only in Druck succeeding at this point) still struggles with being intersectional. This is the major reason why the Ava/Mailin storyline ended not with a bang, but a whimper. There just wasn’t enough work done to connect Fatou’s struggles not just to her disability, but also to her race (and even her sexuality). I think that if people really want (and lbr, it’ll be mostly poc who will put in that effort and work), they can see how Fatou’s race affected the way other people and especially adults reacted to her, but this wasn’t made explicit. If Ava and Mailin are going to argue about racism all season, why not connect that with Karin firing Fatou from Aquarius? As it stands, Karin fired Fatou because of a disability neither of them knew Fatou has, and that was the resolution to that storyline. Why not make it explicit that the Physics teacher had preconceived ideas about Fatou because Fatou is black? Why wasn’t Fatou’s disability addressed in the meeting with the coordinator? Why didn’t Fatou express to Mailin that Fatou, too, had issues with how Mailin was acting wrt racism? It felt like, with the way the season was putting so much emphasis on racism, all these threads were going to be connected. In the end though, it almost felt as if only Ava is affected by racism (aside from Mailin mentioning Fatou in the last episode). It’s not like talking about how racism affects Fatou is going to make the topic redundant for Ava’s or Ismail’s season. As a light-skinned black lesbian with a disability, Fatou’s life is going to be impacted by racism in a different way than Ava’s will, as a dark-skinned black fat straight cis girl, or Ismail’s, as a Turkish-German possibly Muslim possibly non binary person. All these experiences are specific enough, and different enough, that they can be touched upon in different seasons without becoming redundant. The fact that Fatou’s season almost seemed to forget at times that she is a black lesbian, doesn’t bode well for Ava’s and Ismail’s season to acknowledge all their struggles.

The bottom line is that this season really was great and did a lot of good, and I feel like the writing just needs to be tweaked a bit for further seasons to be even better and more enjoyable overall. I am very pleasantly surprised by how the team took s1-s4 fan feedback to heart and worked to implement suggestions, and so I really trust them and hope they keep working on the show. It’d be a shame if Druck wasn’t renewed, with this team at the helm.    

[mamamittens]

Long Awaited LoZ Thoughts

I’d like to start this off by explaining my background. I have a BA in English with a minor in Humanities. I have lived all my life in the Bible Belt of America, so my PoV of this series is inevitably going to be, at least in part, from the perspective of a Western-centric, Christianity-influenced woman. I have grown up with a deep interest in folk tales and mythology though, and took several classes on ancient cultures, so my base knowledge of religion all over the world is broader than what you’d probably expect. I am not religious myself, I’m actually agnostic. And this is just an in-universe look at the very strange religion of Hyrule. So, to make things easier, let’s just put aside the obvious meta issues with this world. The wonky timeline, complex lore changes between said timelines, and the fact that the whole series has clearly grown wildly over the course of its development without an overarching plot. The game mechanics being game mechanics. All of it. This whole thing will just be me trying to make sense of the world without the ‘it’s just a game, bro’ crutch. I will be drawing on what I know from the many games I’ve played myself, so if I don’t mention a big piece of lore from a specific game, it’s because I didn’t play it. Go ahead and rule out the early games before Ocarina of Time, as that’s the first game in the series I can remember playing. I was legitimately too young to have ever played anything prior to that, having been born in 1996. Now let’s get started, shall we?

 So, obviously everyone knows that the LoZ world is said to begin with the three goddesses. Din, Nayru, and Farore came together to create the world and before they yote themselves out of the narrative as direct players, they created the Triforce. A powerful artifact capable of granting a wish and giving their respective bearers undefined power. This is directly from Ocarina of Time and we see their symbol, the Triforce, all over the many games with very few exceptions. Now, to be clear, having a polytheistic religion with three main gods is hardly new. Hinduism has three main gods after all (Brahma, Vishnu, and Shiva), and depending on your flavor of Christianity, you have the holy trinity (God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit). There’s even the Celtic goddesses that come specifically in threes (collectively called The Morrigan; Eriu, Fodla, and Banba). This isn’t an exhaustive list of three divine beings, by the way, just know that three is a weird trend in western-centric stories, including religion. But what’s different about the three Hyrule Goddesses? Well, they’re weirdly small for big shot gods. Let me explain.

        So, the three Hindu gods I mentioned earlier each handle a specific aspect. Creation, destruction, and preservation, not necessarily in that order though (which god does what isn’t the point, so just roll with me here). These are very broad and powerful subjects. Christianity is much the same, even though it’s a monotheistic religion. God is literally an all-powerful, omniscient, omnipotent deity. Jesus is his son who gave his life to basically forgive all sin. And I’m not totally clear on the Holy Spirit, but these three are clearly Big Deals with Big Ideas behind them. A good rule of thumb for old religion is that the older the deity, the wider the scope of their job or what they represent. Which makes sense. If you had to personify the forces of the universe, you’d probably start with the sun instead of like… whatever god is responsible for the creation of rice specifically. The bigger and scarier the natural force, the bigger deal that god usually is, putting aside politics and cultural trends. Egypt is a good example of this, as their roster of gods tended to change a lot depending on who was Pharaoh at the time and wherever the city center was. Horus is the god of the sun, or at least one of them, and is generally considered king of the gods. Which makes perfect sense for a land largely made up of a desert.

But what are the three goddesses’ rulers of? Power, Wisdom, and Courage. Each with clear elemental associations and people that are obviously affiliated with them. Nayru, Goddess of Wisdom, is clearly associated with water and likely has a close connection with the Zora. Din, Goddess of Power, is associated with fire and has clear connection with the Gerudo (unclear if the same goddess as the one present in the desert temple in Ocarina of Time). Farore, Goddess of Courage, is associated with all things green and of the earth, including the child-like race of Kokiri who perpetually inhabit the forest. Sure, these are broad topics, but not really… the first thing you’d think of for creators of the universe, are they? And it raises the question about the Hyrule people, who are said to be able to hear the gods due to their pointed ears… let’s put a pin in that and move on.

So, we know there are many gods in this universe, primarily because we meet them. For example, Zephos, God of Winds, in Wind Waker. But he’s clearly a fairly forgotten god, as he shares a shrine with Cylcos, God of Cyclones, which is about as bare as it can be. Just what appears to be a Tori gate with two stone monuments with the simple notes to summon them, almost completely out of the way. Which… I mean, I don’t know many gods with their extension number written on their monuments. That would kind of like going to church on Sunday and seeing “Hit me up if you need me, J-Boy 555-TAKE THE WHEEL” written on the podium. And remember, this is a world and game where the gods actively flooded the world and would therefore hold or have held enough power to directly interfere with Hyrule.

And Skyward Sword clearly has divine beings, one of which even flooded a whole area, though they’re subservient to Hylia. Who we will get back to later, I promise. The three dragons (again, that magic number), capable of divine power, though where that power comes from in unclear. The dragons are of a high status though, as evident by their servants and clear reference to high-class dress of their clothes. These dragons are revered, but clearly not worshipped, much like nobles in that regard. A curious note is the parallels to the three goddesses, and how the symbols are muddled and mixed for these dragons.

Lanayru clearly has the symbols associated with the Zora, and by extension Nayru, but is yellow. He also is saved by time travel used to grow a magic fruit, which Link often uses (time travel) in many games to advance the plot himself (and wouldn’t you know it, but mixing blue with yellow does produce green. Weird). Faron is the water dragon who flooded an area, and she is almost entirely blue (as well as unsettling to look at), surrounded by a species clearly related to the Zora though closer to octopi. But her name is Faron, which is weirdly close to Farore’s name, not Nayru. I mean, they are close to locations that resemble their names of course, but it’s still an interesting note. Finally, there’s Eldin, clearly bearing a symbol associated with the Gerudo without any strange mixes of symbols for the series. Oddly, he’s also the most open of the three dragons, especially considering the Gerudo’s traditional stance of being a ‘no-sausage’ club. Not terribly relevant, but I just thought it was interesting to point out. You can consider the Giants in Majora’s Mask on the same level as them, though their status is unclear (Since they’re summoned by a song and can stop the moon from falling, they probably straddle the line between mortal and divine).

Now, spirits also exist in this world, both as the ghostly variety and the more pseudo-divine. Not to be confused with actual divinity. Divine being can be spirits, but not all spirits are divine. In this context, spirits can be defined more as being of power capable of granting aid in return for something. Zephos can change the winds if called upon, but you don’t need to feed him, for example. But the spirits in Twilight Princess need aid before they can help you. And they’re also not very independent and are able to be fooled easily, which isn’t usually a god-like quality. While more physically present than the three goddesses, they’re also not strictly tangible, and seem to be extremely limited to their location. At best, these spirits could be classified as minor deities below the gods we see in Wind Waker. They also share the same abilities in keeping the realm of Twilight from falling over the land of Hyrule, as well as their weakness to parasites of undetermined origin. An interesting note is that they all seem to live in bodies of water. Let’s put a pin in that one too.

Someone that also counts as a spirit would be Fi and her counterpart, Ghirahim. Literally two halves of the same coin, these two are both very limited in power and function. They don’t represent anything on their own and are very dependent on others to achieve results. How or why they were made is unclear, but it is obvious that both were forged at some point, and clearly gained sentience. Even their personalities and allegiances are a bit odd. Fi for her sci-fi appearance and calculating personality in a fantasy land, and Ghirahim for his… well, everything. I don’t know why the root of all evil would make his weapon a full-tilt diva, let alone on purpose. Ghirahim always struck me as odd since his bombastic personality seemed to clash with his ultimate fate of just being a weapon for Demise.

Okay, so the Great Fairies are weird, okay?! Like, really weird. They act as spirits (I can’t think of any that aren’t restricted to a body of water in some form), but are very independent. They also don’t necessarily need anything from Link to offer assistance. Sometimes, just opening the fairy fountain is enough to gain items needed to progress. And there’s also the fact that fairies heal you upon ‘death’, though with a limited heart capacity. Sometimes they need you to do something though, like the Breath of the Wild fairies need rupees to function or items to upgrade equipment. They also usually look human, like Majora’s Mask Great Fairies are clearly just… giant women with color coded accessories. But like, they float. Where Great Faires come from, or even just regular fairies, is unclear. Until Wind Waker, Great Faires were adults. But when you finally meet the real Great Fairy in Wind Waker it’s… a child. With a doll that looks just like the ‘Great Fairies’ you’ve seen along the way. This sort of implies that Great Fairies age and die, though clearly with a different lifetime than most races in Hyrule (the child Great Fairy also only looks somewhat human compared to other Great Fairies, so make of that what you will). And it also implies that all the adult Great Fairies are dead (you’re welcome for that depressing thought), with the last one trapped in a hollow tree only accessible by the power of a God.

In Breath of the Wild, the Great Fairies are both diminished but more powerful. They literally are stuck in a giant flower with water in it, with few fairies around them, and require riches to get stronger. The connection to their new restrictions to this need for material wealth is unclear. It’s also interesting to note that their fountains are no longer places that appear to be man-made holy temples and they seem to be out of the way… well, for a given value of ‘out of the way’ (looking at you ninja village). These fairies can accomplish more tasks, but certainly won’t be doing it for free or with minimal effort. A far cry from their first appearances (no, I don’t consider using explosives a difficult task).

But Fairies are also companions with nebulous tasks, such as in Ocarina of Time, where Tatl follows Link until the end of the game. And Kokiri have their own fairy as a sign of whatever accounts for adulthood in their race. The Skull Kid in Majora’s Mask has two fairy friends who seemed to have been either lost or abandoned. Who or what gives them purpose and life is unclear, though the Great Deku Tree from Ocarina of Time can give commands, it doesn’t seem to be something he does normally? As a side note, it’s really not clear what, if anything he can actually do. Though the relative safety of the surrounding area is clearly tied with his wellbeing in all iterations, he doesn’t seem to directly influence it, or be capable of self-defense.

Now, onto the elephant in the room! Hylia! Who the hell is this?! A more recent entry to the series, her divine roll is unclear (though she clearly guards the Triforce in some capacity). It can be assumed that she’s somehow a goddess tied directly to the Hylian people, but when she appeared is up for debate. Timeline wise, it’s almost like knowledge of her was suppressed for some reason, giving rise to the Triforce mythos we all know and love without hide or hair of her seen. We know that she favored the original Link greatly, enough to shed her divinity to be reborn as a mortal and assist him. How or why is also unclear, though it wouldn’t be unfair to assume she loved him, as divine ladies holding an affair with a mortal isn’t uncommon in mythology (or even male gods doing the same, before anyone brings up Zeus). But she makes a resurgence in Breath of the Wild, with statues and everything, with the three goddesses left to only vague references in the background. Which is super weird, though not uncommon for places like Ancient Egypt. The fact that the ruling family was literally descendant from a goddess is what makes it weird though, since any monarchy worth their salt would milk that until the peasant folk revolted and made a new religion to justify killing a god.

Zelda in every incarnation is literally descendant from the original and still held at least a fraction of that divine power. So much so that a cornerstone of a powerful religious artifact inevitably ends up in her hands (or on the back of her right hand, as it were). But what is Hylia a Goddess of? We don’t know. It’s never said. Anywhere. And that’s super weird, even for a ubiquitous deity. Sure she’s a Goddess of Hyrule but… what does that mean? That can’t be all she is? Her reincarnation is literally locked in a generational struggle against the forces of darkness! What can she do as a Goddess? Well, she makes Link stronger in return for items, but that seems to be it. In Ocarina of Time, Zelda was capable of sending Link back to the past, but that was with a magic item. And we know Hylia isn’t the Goddess of Time, because Zelda references her in Majora’s Mask (sequel to Ocarina of Time, therefore implying that there are more gods unmentioned at that time), when Hylia should be mortal or at least fragmented (because Zelda exists at the time with powers and a Triforce piece). The Guardian of Time in Hyrule Warriors also fell in love with Link before splitting into Cia and Lana (and was unable to fuse back together again), so it’s unlikely that she’s the Goddess of Time Zelda was referring to, though that detail is interesting to note. No, I will not discuss if Hyrule Warriors is canon (either game), as this is already long enough as it is.

So, that brings us to Ganon, or in his original form, Demise. Which… what’s up with that? Who is this guy? He directly opposes the gods and just… gets away with it! Repeatedly! Sure, he loses most of the time, but still. It’s unclear where Demise came from, or even what he is, though judging by Ghirahim’s ‘Demon Lord’ title, it can be assumed that he is some type of demon himself. And that the many monsters we see are also considered demons, which makes sense with how they always work for Demise (or his many iterations) in some form or another. Considering how much it takes to simply seal him away, he can’t be just a demon though.

        Demise obviously pulled the same trick Hylia did, which directly sets him up as a counterpart to her, but what does it mean? Why would he do that? What is Demise that he can’t be beat with the power of a Goddess alone and needs not only a brave knight but a blade literally made to counter him? Within the context of religion, the best guess I can make is that he’s some form of a God of Darkness, possibly also Temptation, Greed, and Pigs Corruption. It fits within the narrative since power is often the strongest form of temptation and we know that demons capable of opposing the gods exist. The Horned Statue literally takes Hylia’s blessings in exchange for wealth, and was turned into a statue for it. What it stands to gain from any of it is unclear, but interestingly enough, Hylia doesn’t mind that it closely resembles her own statues. So, this raises the question… why isn’t Demise a forgotten statue somewhere along a dusty road? How did he curse(?) both a reborn goddess and a human in an eternal struggle for the fate of Hyrule?

        Being a god is about the only explanation for why he can do the things that he does. It explains why, in every incarnation, he ends up a rule (like Zelda). How he controls so many different species with ease. He corrupts the conflicted as easily as breathing. An interesting note is how Demise in his many forms usually ends up corrupting once good forces in some way, typically with parasites or evil spirits. And with this context, Hylia must be a Goddess of Light, and possibly some form of Will and Purity to oppose Demise’s power. It would also make her a good candidate for looking after the Triforce in that case. And yet we don’t know any of this for sure either, which is, again, very strange considering their presence from the very beginning. Literally.

Now, I want to mention the temples as a last point before wrapping this up, because it has bothered me since I was a wee little whipper snapper. For a place of worship, they sure are hard to navigate, even when they’re empty of monsters. And it’s not like Hyrule doesn’t get this, because the Temple of Time in Ocarina of Time is straight up a church. Just… without pews, so clearly not perfect, but it is possible for people to come in and… worship time, I guess. And no, not the Goddess of Time, because there’s no statue for that. I mean, I know it’s secretly hiding the Master Sword, but it is definitely a church otherwise. What a normal service looks like I can’t say for sure, but it’s definitely not like literally any other temples we see.

        Now, I know it’s a little hard to remember, but temples are usually places where one goes to worship the gods (or even just a god). And we know gods exist in a very real way in Hyrule! They still manage to name Zelda the same thing despite having seemingly buried their divine origins, so some knowledge of gods walking the mortal realm exists. But the temples/dungeons we see usually don’t have much in the way of religious iconography, with a few exceptions (interestingly it’s typically the desert area that actually has statues and could feasibly have had a real capacity for worship). You want to be a devout follower of a god anywhere else? Well, fuck you. Hope you brought a sword and a good pair of boots. If you’re allowed inside at all, since it’s usually the local leaders that are only allowed inside for some reason. And most games don’t seem to have very religious people, despite all the references to divinity. Not like we’d expect them to, at least. And I personally can’t blame them. If I tried to join a religion but found only a wall as an entrance, I’d be pretty disheartened too. Then I’d be pretty pissed to find out I needed not only a royal instrument handed down the monarchy, but their freaking lullaby to even get in to the place of worship. But we know they pray to the gods at least semi-often, since that’s one of the inciting incidences in Wind Waker. And they have offering to statues of Hylia.

        The temples suggest the bar to impress the gods is pretty high, and not in a ‘sacrifice your eldest child’ kind of way. To even get the chance to reach the inner chambers you better hope it’s been kept well and that you didn’t skip leg day recently. Something I didn’t really mention before is that usually, the less involved the gods are, the more independent the people are from worship. If you worry that your local deity will flood your fields, you’re probably leaving regular offerings at their nearby shrine or temple. But if you know that the gods don’t care about literally anything you do, why worship them at all? Why make statues, art, or temples? Why bother with any of it? The answer is you don’t. So these highly selective temples are pretty weird unless you go with the idea the gods are just really done with people and never want to talk to them unless absolutely necessary.

So, I’ve rambled for over twelve pages now. What’s the point? What does any of this mean? I’m honestly not sure, but I have a sinking feeling that there’s some serious shit going on in the Hyrule pantheon. Mortals have been mostly abandoned to their doom. Gods cast out and forgotten entirely. And somehow advanced civilizations keep forming and getting destroyed with only remnants left behind with zero explanation. Assuming the original gods are even alive at this point, which I’m not entirely certain of. Their death certainly explains how Demise/Ganon keeps getting stronger, looking less and less Hylian as time goes on, if he looks humanoid to begin with.

I wouldn’t even assume it’s entirely voluntary at this point either, as Ganon clearly doesn’t have the same motivations in every incarnation (see my previous post about Wind Waker). I’m rather excited about Breath of the Wild 2, as the implications of dehydrated husk Ganon is compelling. Particularly in light of the character development Link and Zelda have received in the first Breath of the Wild. I wouldn’t be surprised if Ganon/Demise turns out to be a fallen god trying to get back home (a nice parallel to Wind Waker, actually), cast out as a scape goat. Blamed for every form of corruption and greed that naturally follows in his wake. I think I said this before, but it is interesting that he is always reborn among the Gerudo, a race famously all females. Sometimes thieves, but nearly always in a position that would naturally crave power to take control of their lives compared to Hylians. Regardless of the consequences.

Is it true? I don’t know. Probably not, but the fact that I can draw these conclusions in three hours of writing is pretty neat. I have a lot of feelings about this franchise, having grown up with it, but I eagerly await what comes next. And I should probably go to bed. Make of all this what you will.

[hobidreams]

hey babe… i was wondering if you had any advice for starting a difficult conversation with a friend? without getting too specific, she has this coping mechanism where yknow, if done in moderation is completely fine. however,,, it’s not really done in moderation and she has expressed multiple times that she doesn’t like doing it or the way it makes her feel. it’s been going on for almost a year now and we’ve been telling her that we’re always here for here and that we’ll always be here for her if she needs us but nothing has changed yknow… and i’m all for respecting other people’s choices and their lifestyle but it’s hurting her at this point….. i just don’t know how to approach her about this whole thing without being too invasive, i guess? hnnnng i just love her so much and seeing her suffer like that while also refusing help from anyone is painful to see.

hi babe!! ahhhh... yeah i feel you. i was in a similar situation a few years ago where my friend and i had to decide whether or not to directly intervene with the behavior of the third friend in our group. we also did the same thing you did, telling her that we were there for her endlessly but it didn't give her the push she needed to change. and it also was hurting us in return bc we kept getting more and more frustrated at the situation. so i think direct intervention is the most effective way since you've been trying other methods for a year.

full answer under the cut!

you say we, so i assume you’re in a group of friends that’s concerned about one in the group? personally, i would send the person she's closest to in to have a one on one chat with her, whether that’s you or not. i think its important not to make her feel like its you all vs. her, so having everyone there might be overwhelming. im not sure if this is a RL friend or online friend but i think its best to do it in person, in a location that they’re comfortable in, if that’s an option. that way a) they feel more relaxed and b) they can't just ignore ur messages (like my friend used to do when she was running away from problems. she used to not reply for weeks even tho she was actively online all the time). obviously dont do it before an event or dinner date or anything.

i would frame it as being ultimately her choice whether or not to change, but that your friendship with her is being negatively impacted by her decisions. i’d emphasize that you’ll continue to be her friend, but that it’s because you care so much about her that you wish to see her in a healthier place. you can maybe suggest working with her to create steps towards change, or guiding her to some resources she might look into, depending on what the mechanism is! overall, i would say just try your best to frame it coming from a place of love, not of judgement. since she already seems to know that its a bad habit for her, i think presenting her with the tangible help she needs might be most effective. for example, if she keeps buying too many things she doesn’t need, you might work together to create a budget, or to go through several steps to rationalize/slow down each purchase before she clicks check out on any shopping sites. or you could help her find a therapist or other professional to help her, depending on the severity of the coping mechanism!!

also i would say... be prepared for her to lash out. when i talked with my friend, it was a suuuuuuper awkward conversation because i didnt want her to feel attacked (she was going through a lot but .. she’s kind of always going through a lot of drama lol...) but i had to keep pushing through. thankfully, my friend took it well. but i think, from your description of the situation, this is a conversation that has to be had. and though she might be upset with you for directly discussing it with her, it will likely help her in the long run. so yeah. 

i hope everything goes well for you 💜 i can really feel your care for your friend through your message. if only we were all blessed with such wonderful friends in our lives! 💞 i hope this was able to help a bit <3

[mallowstep]

I just thought about this

Do you think the Clan cats might ever have some form of PTSD from eather witnessing another cats death in any form like in battle or another disaster or even killing another cat themselves

I really do want to expand on this

okay matthew from the end of this post here it turns out i have a lot of thoughts and talked for like, almost 2k words about this. sorry. there's a tldr at the end.

hmmmmm

my official answer is, "sure, anything is possible, especially if you want to explore that."

my more rambly answer is...kind of.

we're just going to jump straight in with serious cat talk here, but cats? those mofos are killing machines. they are highly efficient hunters. kind of like people and creating things.

on the other hand, cats are also huge cowards who don't like to fight. hence cat and mouse: the cat doesn't want to go in for the kill unless they're sure they can execute it.

i like to think of them as a very krav maga idea: "we don't fight unless we absolutely have to, but once we go in, we go all in."

so...on one hand, "do cats experience ptsd from killing each other?" feels kind of like asking, "do humans experience ptsd from making things?", and yet, that's clearly extremely reductive.

it's also worth talking about what ptsd is. it's easy to think of ptsd as equivalent to trauma, but it's not.

trauma is, well, traumatic events, ptsd is one possible response. most people who experience trauma do not develop ptsd.

(there's also c-ptsd, but i'm getting to that.)

ptsd is, basically, an overactive adrenaline response, basically. it can look similar to depression and anxiety, but it's not the same. things like flashbacks and triggers are not exclusive to ptsd, or even any specific mental illness. it's normal to experience ptsd-like symptoms after a traumatic event. that's a traumatic response.

ptsd is, instead, the unhealthy extension of that, in time, and possibly severity.

before i go any farther, i just want to say, this is not to say you need to have ptsd to have trauma, that you can't have ptsd/trauma if XYZ, etc., so please, give me the benefit of the doubt here. it's always tricky to word these things in a way that is both clear about what i mean and not harming people.

mental illness is always a tricky subject. trying to fit a sum of many symptoms into boxes will never work, but i am going to lean on it as a tool to categorize and discuss experiences in a general sense.

i also want to mention c-ptsd, or "complex post-traumatic stress disorder." this is a debated diagnosis, in that where it fits into mental illness boxes is argued and it's yet to be included in the dsm, but for now, it's sufficient to think of it as ptsd's fraternal twin.

c-ptsd develops when trauma is prolonged, and there's little/no chance of escape. think kidnappings and child abuse.

it shares a lot of symptoms with ptsd, but it has its own unique cluster of symptoms, especially surrounding relationship issues.

right. we can rule that off for things cats typically experience from battle. but i still want to talk about it.

but ptsd is in reference to human reactions to trauma, which is fine! all warrior cats are at least a little anthropomorphised, or it wouldn't be fun to read about.

okay, before i lose the thread, circling back to my point, the conditions for ptsd are a prolonged response to a traumatic event. i, personally, don't think that your everyday warrior is going to experience this. some amount of battle is normal for cats, yeah?

but i do think ptsd/ptsd-like conditions are quite possible. i'm going to move into a discussion of various characters, now, and i'll put that under a read more.

okay, let's examine a few different cats, starting with mudfur.

why mudfur? because he chooses to be a medicine cat specifically because the battles of being a warrior are too much for him. does this mean he's experiencing ptsd? no, i don't think so. we never see any indication of him having flashbacks or hypervigilance. mind, i have

okay sorry you uh

i took a break to read mothwing's secret

see i've been putting it off bc i knew it was going to make me feel things and lord it did

phew

well i was going to talk about mothwing but first, back to mudfur

i can now confirm that we don't see any evidence of ptsd in him. trauma, maybe, but not ptsd.

which...checks.

next cat, ivypool.

but my ivypool, not canon ivypool, because i gave ivypool ptsd.

if you haven't read it, hedera helix is my canon compliant ivypool series, and you can get the Deets there, but i think "fair is the night" is the piece to focus on here. specifically,

The dark is the same, and the heat, and the way she slinks through the shadows, trying not to take notice. The way every pawstep is echoingly loud, and how she can't catch her breath or find her thoughts over the noise. All that's missing is.

Him.

Maybe Ivypool does still dream.

She hisses, her belt bristling, tail lashing, and raises her paw, claws extended.

what's going on here is that she mistakes tigerheart for hawkfrost.

yes, she has ptsd.

she also has c-ptsd in my writing, but i don't want to talk about this at the moment, because ivypool is complex, and i don't feel like bringing dovewing into this. but no, this is her having ptsd from her (dark forest) mentor trying to kill her. a cat she, at least on some level, trusted turning on her and attempting to kill her.

so for ivypool, it's the unexpected that traumatizes her.

which i think makes sense: cats don't generally expect to be attacked by those they trust. which leads me into...

character three: bluestar.

now, bluestar is complex because of the dementia, but i think it's pretty easy to say: tigerclaw (a cat she trusts) betrays her, she gets hypervigilant and stops trusting people.

i'm deliberately going short on this because i'm at almost a thousand words and uh,, i just want to talk about mothwing.

mothwing. my baby. my beloved. my beautiful.

fuuuuck okay so i should not have read mothwing's secret because this is going to turn into me writing mostly about that, but i actually knew 90% of what was contained in it through moonkitti videos + doing research for various mothwing related projects.

i think the only thing i learned was the moonkitti scene about bees is actually completely canonical, as written, and that it was possible for me to love mothwing more than i already do.

usually, i'd want to also talk about willowshine, but i'm going to keep my focus on mothwing. willow my love is going to come up, but i'm keeping my focus tight.

mothwing! onto my purpose: mothwing and c-ptsd and religious trauma.

she will get her own essay i have a document titled "mothwing and religious trauma" but with trope-bingo i've been writing the essays less, so bear with me.

anyway. i'm not waffling, i'm just trying to set up a good starting point so i don't ramble past the purpose. and i think...the scene with mudfur and mothwing near the end is what i'm honing in on. (spoilers, duh, but also, you don't need to have read it.)

so mudfur comes to mothwing after the battle, and she turns him away. he doesn't understand, but i do.

religion has been used against mothwing her entire life. her clan used it (inadvertently) to keep her from her purpose, hawkfrost used it to maintain his control over her, and mistystar used it to again keep her from her purpose and passion. (and yes, i have strong feelings about what this does to willowshine, but i'm trying to stay on-topic.)

and then, the first tangible proof she has of starclan is the dark forest. and her brother. attacking the nursery. and her.

and then mudfur has the audacity to say, "yeah sorry we don't know anything! but like why are you still rejecting us?"

(makes me want to rewrite the ending of "if you love me any, let me know it now" actually, i'm angry. not going to, but i want to.)

adfskjl mothwing is my new purpose for existing. i may actually consider changing my blog title from "in this house we lovewing dovewing" to something mothwing themed. i love her. expect a mothwing focus sometime soon-ish.

right, so, i don't think mothwing's perspective needs to be explained here. but...she is very self-aware of her position. she struggles with it. she doesn't want to talk to willowshine about her beliefs — she's grateful when willowpaw just accepts it and doesn't discuss it with her.

mothwing as a character has always been appealing to me. but. again, trying to keep focused, her brother is manipulative and cruel.

(i'm not saying abusive because i don't know if he really is. i'd want to do a proper analysis for that, not just ramble in a blank document for a while. he's toxic, but i try to reserve abusive for abusive characters. i think he is, but i don't know how i would defend that, ergo, i'm avoiding it for now.)

just. her whole life.

she spends a long time trusting others, looking to starclan for answer and salvation, and it keeps letting her down, and others keep using it against her, like a weapon. there's a lot to mothwing, but i'm really trying to stay on topic.

before i get to my closing arguments, some honorable mentions for characters i didn't talk about, but could have:

squirrelflight

feathertail, stormfur, and mistyfoot

dovewing

briarlight. okay she's such a good honorable mention i just have to explore this for a second, but the scene in bramblestar's storm where she's afraid of falling trees is good. i don't know, she seems fairly functional, but she's definitely not "over it."

anyone captured by twolegs.

tawnypelt

bramblestar. before you gasp, he too trained in the dark forest and was manipulated by hawkfrost and tigerstar.

probably a lot more.

so anyway, if you hung around for nearly 2k words to listen to me talk about cat trauma, here's my closing statement:

i think ptsd in clan cats is definitely going to be a thing, but i think, more often than not, it's not going to come from the battle. we looked at several examples where the incident happened during a battle, but i think it's the betrayal that's more shocking than the actual fighting.

i didn't address ptsd from cats killing each other, other than mudfur, and that's...frankly that's because i don't know. it is very hard for me to sympathize with those characters long enough to think critically about it.

like, i can write villain pov, but i don't think i can actually say, "what if XYZ feels bad for killing someone?" even if i was going to write about like, firestar killing scourge, i don't think i could.

not in this context, anyway.

similarly, i think a lot of what we'll see is trauma. cats are already extremely vigilant, and while it's possible to get hypervigilant cats, i'm not sure how often it's going to come out. cats are good at hiding physical pain, ipso facto, i imagine they're good at hiding emotional pain.

which isn't to say that they...you know what? you know what? if you want to come argue with me about human ptsd, you can do that on my main. but i'm talking about cats, and i say that they probably don't experience ptsd because they probably shove away a lot of the external symptoms, and that's mostly how we identify ptsd. this is not an end-all be-all, nor does it apply to people, but i don't know how to begin couching this, and i'm tired.

alright, well...

tl/dr: yes, trauma and maybe ptsd occur in clan cats, but i think it's more likely to be from betrayal than fighting.

dkjl this was a lot if u have follow up qs or just wanna discuss this my ask box is open! <3

[ewineenaenae]

Perception Erina's Hiraishin Theory: Teleporting vs Leaping(Traveling)

An excerpt from chapter 4 of 'Perception'

Disclaimer: I do not own JJK in any shape or form.

In all aspects, fuinjutsu wasn't an easy thing to tackle. The very essence of fuinjutsu is that it is the base of all seals. Seals are used to store items. A basic example is storage scrolls. The laws of the previous world didn't apply to this one though the two had their similarities. She had to revamp the entire concept of fuinjutsu into one where this world could comprehend and allow.

It was an effort that took a decade to perfect. Unlike Erina's previous world, fuinjutsu was solely for seals in this world. She couldn't cast a sealing barrier, retrains, or any of the incredible sub-counterparts that fuinjutsu could have offered. For now, at least.

What's more, the hiraishin wasn't originally of her creation. A long time ago, curiosity was eating her away about how the technique worked. So she stoled a forbidden scroll of the original.

Safe to say, whatever she uncovered didn't live up to her expectation.

Her own hiraishin was an improvised version of the original. It took her almost a lifetime to develop to complement her fighting style. For lack of a better name, she referred to the technique as 'hiraishin.' She supposed she could rename it. However, she didn't have the slightest clue on what to call it.

She can apply a specialized hiraishin formula seal with the merest touch onto any surface, granted it has to be tangible. There are no limits to how many targets she can mark with the seal. By placing her formula on her targets or a place, she can 'teleport' to them. Though, 'teleport' wasn't the word she'd have described it.

The word she'd prefer was 'leap.'

It was not like switching places or immediately appearing on the target. Judging by Erina's current location, she would leap to the closest hiraishin seal and the next until she reached the specific mark.

The thing or person transfers to a pocket dimension while simultaneously leaping from nearest seal to seal at high speed. By doing this, it spares minimal cursed energy usage, but there is also the time lag. They would then resummoned at the desired target. That was why most people sometimes get nauseous when they travel with the hiraishin.

In Erina's case, she rarely feels sick due to the numerous times she uses the hiraishin. She compares this effect to how objects sealed in a storage scroll's pocket dimension. It creates a separate space for the person or thing(like a mini domain expansion?). The pocket dimension exists to prevent any damage to the items or bodies kept in there.

To put it simply, the teleportation of the hiraishin and the action of taking out the object were similar. Explaining it any further would be one hell of a theory that was a pain that would bite at her butt.

She rarely utilizes her hiraishin in combat situations. It was more of a form of transport and one-way escape route.

Summing up, fuinjutsu was a literal mind-fuck Erina did not recommend anyone crazy, even sorcerers, to learn unless they are prepared to get emotionally scarred for life.

Her hiraishin does not stick to the English translated name of 'Flying Thunder God,' cause apparently the technique is far from that kind of speed. Fast but not quite.

I'd like to think that the movements are more of leaps and travels than teleportation, which is more automatic and direct. The thing or person is transferred to a pocket dimension at the same time, do not have any recollections of the place.

You would feel that not much time has past even though, it did.

On that note, I've attach a visual representation on Erina's technique hiraishin.

[houchlife]

Top 7 Law Of Attraction Tips To Manifest More Of What You Want!

By Heather Mathews Author of Manifestation Miracle      “Everything is within your power, and your power is within you.” ― Janice Trachtman Charlie, a stay at home dad, works out of his living room while looking after his three-year-old toddler. As a social media consultant, he depends on his laptop to make a living. The problem is that his beat up computer was as old as his kid, and it was always glitching on him. So Charlie kept focusing on getting a new computer – a 13-inch Macbook Pro in particular. Eventually, his old laptop gave out, which made him panic a bit. So Charlie went online to look for another one while having the shiny new Macbook in the back of his mind. After hours of searching, he couldn’t find a reasonably priced model. So he was about to settle on another type of laptop and was close to closing the sale. But at the last minute, Charlie decided to check the price listings for a used version of the computer that he REALLY wanted. And just like that, someone was selling a six-month old Macbook Pro for a price significantly cheaper than a store-bought one. So Charlie got what he wanted, and at a better deal than he had hoped for! Now, Charlie’s incredible stroke of luck seemed like a fluke to him at first, but then another awesome thing happened shortly after. You see, Charlie was also looking for a new job because he felt stuck in his current one. So he had his sights set on another company with a position in mind. The truth was that he wasn’t all that confident he was even qualified for the position, but he went over the job description again and again. Charlie even printed the job ad and put it on his refrigerator door so he could see it every day. A couple of weeks after his interview, he got a call from the company and said he got the job. On Charlie’s first day, his new boss told him, “Honestly, your skillset isn’t an exact match for what we were looking for. But I really liked how you did at the interview…and besides, we can train you for the other things you need to learn, anyway. You have a great attitude and that’s more important than being 100% qualified for the job.” Click Here To Discover the Lazy Person’s Secret To Get Everything You’ve Ever Wished For      Is It Coincidence - Or Something Else at Work? It’s easy to brush off Charlie’s streak as plain dumb luck, but could he have WILLED his good fortune to happen? After all, the common element between getting his new laptop and the new job was that he focused on both things intensely. Charlie kept it in his thoughts all the time. More than that, he created a detailed picture of his desired state in his mind. He imagined what it would be like to hold his new laptop and how he’d feel working in the new job he was aiming for. Charlie visualized both scenarios so vividly that he could almost taste it. Whether he knew it or not, he was putting the basic principle of The Law of Attraction to work - and it served him well. As the name implies, this law decrees that “like attracts like.” There’s a global movement behind this belief, and it says that the kind of thoughts you send out to the Universe emit a certain frequency – be it helpful or harmful. And you have the power to control the wavelength you operate on, which in turn attracts circumstances that match your energy. So by focusing on positive outcomes and giving out positive vibrations, you can turn your thoughts into a tangible force of good in your life! On the other side of the coin, dwelling on the negative aspects of life and focusing your attention on the things you resent attracts even MORE negativity into your world. Like Charlie, you can think of something specific you want, and hold that image in your mind. Create all the details that bring the picture to life, then believe that you already have it. When you go about your day thinking that the object of your desire is already a matter of fact… …this sends out a clear, strong message to the Universe that you truly WANT and BELIEVE it. But this is just the tip of the iceberg; there are other ways to raise your frequency even higher. By following these 7 Tips to Create the Life You’ve Always Dreamed Of, you’ll naturally attract everything you’ve ever wanted – and MORE:

#1: Set aside time to focus on what you desire

    The first habit is simple enough: give yourself at least 5-7 minutes daily to visualize the things you want to turn into reality.

You can do this by finding a quiet place to contemplate, then sit upright with your eyes closed. While keeping your desires front and center in your thoughts, breathe deeply in and out.

Focus on your breath and the sensations your body is feeling, and use that as anchor to keep your thoughts from straying.

If your mind does go on a tangent, gently bring yourself back to your breathing AND your desired future state.

You’ll get a lot of benefits from doing this for just a few minutes every day. For instance, many studies have proven the stress-reducing properties of meditation.

A study at the Massachusetts General Hospital showed that people who tried their meditation program experienced significantly less health problems than before.

They ended up not having to see a doctor or go to the emergency room, saving them about $2,300 in medical costs for EACH person!

On top of that of course, meditation also helps you keep your eye on the prize and give you the determination to make it happen.

Some people however, have trouble meditating and get easily distracted.

If you need a little guidance with this habit, I’ve got a special gift for you – but more on that later…

MORE ABOUT  Motivational / Transformational

#2: Be grateful and practice gratitude

    Ever hear the expression “Thank your lucky stars”?

Back in ancient times, people believed that celestial bodies played a huge role in someone’s destiny.

Today, many still believe that these same external forces affect our lives.

The Law of Attraction draws from this belief, and it states that we should be gratefull whenever the Universe sends something good our way.

This is another way of fine tuning your frequency. When you actively pay attention to the positive things that happen around you, it acts like a magnet that attracts similar things.

And by being thankful for your blessings, you’re sending a powerful message to the Universe that essentially translates to:

“Thank you, that was awesome! More please!”

MORE ABOUT  Motivational / Transformational

#3: Take a leap of faith

    The main challenge that people have with manifesting their desires is dealing with the world of the intangible.

It can be daunting (and even discouraging) to imagine a future outcome that hasn’t happened yet.

It takes some faith to push past that hazy uncertainty, and not everyone has it in them to do so.

So you need to check your inner Doubting Thomas at the door for a moment and appreciate how other people have used the Law of Attraction to succeed.

Consider the great figures from the past: Albert Einstein, Nelson Mandela, Marie Curie, Vincent Van Gogh and Nikola Tesla.

All of them were shining examples of how they used their mind and willpower to create something valuable in this world.

They raised their own frequency and as result, had a different energy from the rest of humanity.

Even though they’re gone, their legacy lives on, and we can still feel its impact today.

It’s all because they took a brave step into the unknown.

Even though they couldn’t see how their work would ripple through the next several decades, they still powered through.

The skepticism that people have is the result of growing up.

As you get older and have more experiences, a certain amount of jadedness sets in.

That’s why you won’t find any of that in kids. Just think about how children play make-believe.

When they yell, “The floor is lava!” you can bet they’ll be scrambling for the nearest couch or chair to avoid getting ��burned.”

On a certain level, they TRULY believe that the floor is literally molten rock.

They can see the hot, glowing lava, burning everything its path…

…and they do everything to stay out of its way.

That’s the power the mind and imagination in action.

Learn how to see the world on this level again. That way, you can see a bright future before it happens – then go on to make it a reality.

Click Here To Learn How to Force the Universe to Manifest Your Dream Life 

MORE ABOUT  Motivational / Transformational

#4: Keep on keepin’ on

One of the realities of this world is that you can’t eliminate adversity.

It’s always going to be an uphill climb at some point, especially when you’ve just taken on a new challenge.

You’ve been eating right and working out, but the pounds aren’t quite flying off as you’d hoped.

You started a side income project, but your cash flow hasn’t been anything more than a trickle.

You’ve tried beating your depression with exercise, therapy and medication, but the dark thoughts still charge at you like a freight train.

That’s called RESISTANCE.

It will always be there, even as you dig deep and do everything in your power to manifest the reality you want.

Being a grown-up means expecting those external circumstances to work against you.

Your best response? PUSH BACK.

Keep your inner world together, and the outside world will follow suit.

Dumbledore once told Harry Potter, “Help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it.”

Remember: the hero of the story is never a one-person army.

Harry had Hermione and Ron.

Luke had Obi-Wan and Yoda.

And you don’t have to fly solo in YOUR journey.

Think about the people in your inner circle – are they giving you the energy, motivation and inspiration to succeed?

If the company you keep sneers at growth and being better, maybe it’s time to look for other friends to round out your squad.

Seek people who lead by example and can show you how to overcome that resistance in your life.

Learn from them and let their enthusiasm rub off you.

While you’re at it, use technology to connect to like-minded folks who can help you in your quest. Open your phone or laptop and fire up YouTube, Vimeo or any other video streaming site.

TED talks, self-help lectures and tons of other empowering content are literally at your fingertips.

The Universe has too much abundance for you to ignore.

We’re part of a vast human network, and our collective energy affects everyone else in ways we can’t yet fully comprehend.

This network has always been around; the Internet merely accelerated it. Tap into it and unleash its power.

MORE ABOUT  Motivational / Transformational

#5: Tune out your Negative Ned (or Nancy)

    There’s always that voice in the back of your head that kicks in when life gets tough.

It loves whispering things in your ear, usually at the height of your frustration and despair:

- “You totally blew that one, why do you even bother trying?”

- “You had one job and you screwed it up like always…I’m not even surprised.”

- “Getting back on the horse, are we? I give it a week before you go back to your old ways. Better to quit while you’re ahead!”

- “You actually thought he was complimenting you? Oh, bless your heart…it’s called ‘small talk’ and ‘being nice’.”

If you’re like the rest of the human species, you’re going to run into those nasty folks called insecurity, self-doubt and fear.

They’re going to take up space in your head and try to drown you out with their noise.

Rumi, a 13th-century Persian poet and scholar, knew this well. It his poem “The Guest House”, he spoke an ancient truth about the human condition.

He likened all our thoughts and feelings – both good and bad – as visitors who stopped by the guest house of the soul.

And this line struck me the most:

“The dark thought, the shame, the malice. Meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.”

Once I understood what it meant, I realized that I didn’t have to resist it. I could simply let my obnoxious guests do their thing, and see them out.

It’s not about covering your ears and going, “La la la la! I can’t hear you!”

Acknowledging their existence in your head is NOT the same as letting them win.

The world’s greatest achievers go through bouts of darkness and anger like everyone else.

The main difference is that they use their failures as material for an instruction manual called “What NOT to Do and How to Do It Better The Next Time Around”.

MORE ABOUT  Motivational / Transformational

#6: Ditch your story

    You shouldn’t stop at managing your negative thoughts, however. You need to peel back another layer and go deeper.

Here’s the thing: you grew up on a set of beliefs, whether you’re aware of it or not.

Your parents, teachers, friends and pretty much everyone you knew growing up contributed to your programming.

You don’t know it, but you operate on this programming on a daily basis.

And it influences every decision you make – and how you choose to see the world.

Now this can be a good thing if you grew up around people who were positive, motivated and had a good outlook on life…

…but this is the real world we’re talking about, so NOT everyone had that kind of effect on you.

Somewhere along your journey, someone discouraged you in a subtle way, or put some sort of label that you can’t shake off.

Words like “Underachiever”, “Oddball”, “Loser”, “Nerd”, “Small Fry”, “Ugly Duckling” and “Black Sheep” come to mind…

…and each one is damaging in its own toxic way.

Sadly, most people carry this invisible weight their whole life.

But starting today, you can lay those bricks on the ground and walk away for good. You don’t have to carry that weight for anyone, especially not for THEM.

Stop living your story based on the false narrative that your negative programming created.

All those preconceived beliefs need to go if you want to attract happiness and prosperity in your life.

I’ve seen people achieve INCREDIBLE things – even the impossible – just by doing this one thing.

Lionel, a heroin addict from Michigan, was in and out of jail for the longest time.

But after overdosing within an inch of his life, he decided to ditch his old story.

Even after everyone gave up on Lionel and called him a “screw-up”, he turned it all around.

He let go of the labels that people had been putting on him for YEARS…

…and Lionel decided he didn’t have to be any of those things anymore.

Lionel created a NEW story for himself – one where he was finally free of his crippling addiction and lived a clean, sober life.

What kind of story do YOU want to live out?

MORE ABOUT  Motivational / Transformational

#7: Make your affirmations “pop”

    You might have heard of people making declarations about themselves to manifest them as truth, and not just as an opinion.

When you affirm some truth about yourself, it validates the awesomeness within you.

Words of kindness heal the soul and help forgive past failures.

In short, it’s about LOVING yourself.

After all, you can’t give what you don’t have.

However, saying “Boy I sure love myself!” doesn’t quite do the trick.

To make your affirmations stick in your subconscious, it needs to have a little something extra.

Don’t stop at “I love me!”- take it up another notch to really drive the point home.

Try these on for size:

- “I love myself so much that I want to use my gifts and share them with the world. I want to take this love inside me and use it to lift other people up.”

- “By sharing the love I have, I possess the power to change myself for the better, and the world around me.”

- “I am love, light, peace and prosperity. Anger, hate and scarcity have no power over me.”

- Aside from loving yourself, you can also infuse a dash of humor in your affirmations. Who says you have to be so grim with his Law of Attraction stuff, anyway?

When you add a bit of levity while you affirm yourself, it shushes your Negative Ned (or Nancy) into silence.

Try coming up with statements like these:

- “I’m so awesome that I kick mediocrity in its big fat butt!”

- “I’ve come here to be awesome at everything I do and kick major butt. And I’m all out of butts to kick.”

- “Did you say something, self-doubt? Sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of my awesomeness!”

It’s all a matter of finding the right attitude and tone that suits you. Take a crack at making these affirmations, and you’ll soon find your true inner voice.

What matters is that you inject your affirmations with a serious amount of attitude, and above all, ENERGY.

Without that energy, you won’t give your messages enough “juice” to reach the Universe and show up on its radar.

Those who practice the Law of Attraction often combine these affirmations with their meditation sessions to hit two birds with one stone.

And the results are nothing short of phenomenal.

Now, about that gift I promised you earlier…

To make the MOST out of your meditation, I’ve got a series of audio tracks to help you manifest incredible benefits in your life.

If you want to be the picture of health…

…naturally create wealth wherever you go…

…and enjoy authentic, fulfilling relationships…

…you can achieve ALL of that by simply claiming your FREE gift below:

100% FREE Meditation MP3 Audio Tracks – DOWNLOAD THEM HERE 

[littlemisssquiggles]

So ...about "The Warrior in the Woods"...

Okay so this morning, this squiggle meister took a read at a preview for one of the stories that would be featured in the upcoming RWBY: Fairy Tales of Remnant set to release this year September 15th. It’s titled “The Warrior in the Woods”. If you haven’t read the small preview of the tale for yourself, you can find it right here on kobo.com where you can also preorder a digital copy of the book.

Speaking of, does anyone know where one can preorder a hardcopy version of this book? Or do I have to wait till it comes out in September to order the hard copy version then? Of all the upcoming RWBY-related projects that I was most looking forward to, it’s definitely this one and I’d definitely love to own a tangible copy of the book for myself if it’s available.

Anyways let’s talk about “The Warrior in the Woods” story specifically. Obviously I read it and without spoiling much from the short story, all I can say is that I definitely loved it. I think right out the gate, I’m going to peg this one as one of my favourites of the fairy tales purely because I found it to be a rather sweet one.

[SPOILERS AHEAD! NUFF SAID]

Plot-wise, the tale focuses on a young boy who ends up getting lost in the woods after wandering out too far from his home village while out playing with his friends. Basically the gist is that the people of this boy’s village have lived in peace away from the Grimm; so much so that the villagers; as well as its youths had never encountered a creature of Grimm before.

While lost in the forest, the boy is attacked by a Bolbatusk Grimm (I believe) during which he is rescued by a woman with silver eyes. In a nutshell, the boy is saved by a Silver Eyed Warrior which leads into a routine where every year from the day they met, the young boy would always return to the forest in the hopes of meeting the Silver Eyed Warrior again.

Let’s get into what I liked about this tale:  The whole relationship between the young boy and the Silver Eye who I will hereby refer to as “Warrior”. From the get-go, it’s very evident that the Boy is infatuated with the Warrior but what I found adorable was that this boy’s interest in the Warrior was what encouraged him to brave the forest in the hopes of seeing her time and time again for two to three more years (I believe if I’m remembering correctly). And what I thought was interesting was that each time the boy ventured into the forest, he was described as being much braver and stronger than previous encounters.

During his first encounter with the Warrior, the boy was completely powerless during his first run in with a Grimm but as the years went by, the boy would learn from his experiences and would go in a little more prepared each time. While he still needed the Warrior to come to his aid (which she always did in spite of saying she wouldn’t save him and telling him never to return), I definitely dug how much the boy began to mature with each time he met the Warrior as reflected in his growing combat competency.

I liked the angle of the Boy being motivated to become a stronger person thanks to his meeting with the Warrior. I liked that just as much as I love the angle of how much the Warrior in turn grew to care for the Boy in her own way.

When we first meet the Warrior, she described as strong and beautiful (by the Boy) yet hardened and reserved due to her past experiences since according to her story, her kind were known to be hunted and slain by humans because of their power (as we the readers are aware of from the main series as of V4-V6).

So due to this, the Warrior has basically settled into a life of solitude and survival. This is even reflected in her initial attitude towards the Boy since after saving him the first time, she warned him never to return again.

Unfortunately for the Warrior, she had underestimated the Boy’s persistence since he did return to her and each time they’d meet in the woods upon her saving him, the young boy would bring her gifts as a token of his appreciation and fondness of her as well as a symbol of their growing bond.

And in spite of pushing him away at first and all the times they would “meet” afterwards, I liked how it was shown how much the Boy had grown on the Warrior and how his compassion had warmed him up to her to the point that I think she began looking forward to seeing him in a way---or rather she expected him to always return to her in a sense.

Until one year when the boy returned to woods, he would find his Warrior gone. Whether that meant the warrior had eventually met her fate or simply moved on, I don’t know. It is of my assumption that the Warrior was ultimately killed in battle. The ending of story in regards to the Warrior’s fate felt a bit ambiguous to me. The story mentioned the possibility of the Warrior being dead but honestly never confirms it. Not really. So for me, I’m only assuming that the Warrior did die since that’s how the tale left her conclusion.

Now for the real meat of this post---the comparison that I’ve already seen my Rosegardening peers make after reading this tale and now I’m going to chip in and basically say the same thing too. 

Yes, the Boy and the Warrior definitely remind me of Oscar Pine and Ruby Rose. 

It’s actually kind of hard to NOT make that stark comparison.

After finishing the tale, my theory is that the Boy was probably around the same age as Oscar is currently when he first met the Warrior. Probably 14-15 years of age and I’d like to think that he was probably 17-18 years old by his third and last encounter with the Warrior since later in the story, the author began referring to the boy as a “young adult man” (I believe).  

As for the age of the Warrior, that one has me stumped to be honest. In the story, she is described as “woman”. I also recall the author describing the Warrior having strands of silver in her hair which made me think she was probably a much older woman---probably in her 40s.

Then again…women in their late 20s to early 30s can start showing signs of grey hair. Not to mention that people as young as 18 can start greying out due to family background and stress. 

So…in that case, I dunno. Going off the featured artwork of the Warrior in the preview, she doesn’t look to be that old at all. So I’m going to safely assume, that compared to the Boy, she was probably in her late 20s or so.  

That’s my cookie crumb deduction.

Either way, here we have yet a second example of a RWBY content featuring an adolescent male expressing romantic interest in an older woman with the writers behind the tale treating this dynamic as something wholesome and rather quite sweet. I would be lying through my teeth if I said I wasn’t rooting for the Boy and the Warrior to end up together-together.  I am NOT sorry. My hopeless romantic of a shipping heart couldn’t help but find the boy’s interactions with his Warrior to be adorable since the story treated it that way.

It’s for this reason why despite the story’s ending, a part of me is still kind of hopeful that the preview isn’t the whole story for that specific tale; y’know what I mean? Like I’m kind of hoping that once the full book is out, there will be more to the Warrior in the Woods story that potentially reveals the young boy and the Warrior reuniting and having their happy ending together.

I could be completely wrong here but dagnabbit, they got me again folks. Not gonna lie. I want this now. I need Roosterteeth to adapt this book into a new animated series like World of Remnant. These characters don’t even have names and already I adore their bond and story together.

Overall, as you can tell, I’m smitten with the relationship between the Boy and his Warrior. And the ending where the boy; now a man, professes his love for his Warrior since the day they met only made me gush even more over this pair. In the squiggle shire, we stan “A Boy and his Warrior”. That’s what I’m going to call this pair.

I guess the point that I’m trying to make here is that it’s nice to see a love---even if it was unrequited in a sense---between a young man and an older woman be treated respectfully in literature. We live in a time when people would screech over the slightest age difference while ignoring the context of the relationship itself.

Though only a short story, I’m happy that the author of Fairy Tales of Remnant portrayed the rapport between the Boy and his Warrior as a sweet relationship.

It’s here where I’m reminded of the Rosegarden dynamic. For the most part, the CRWBY Writers have always treated the bond between Ruby and Oscar as wholesome. It’s what makes the arguments against it in regards to their small 2-year age different sound so silly in my opinion.

So that being said, thank you CRWBY and E.C. Myers for creating yet another sweet dynamic between a young adolescent teenage boy and an otherwise “older” and much more experienced Silver Eyed Warrior.

“…I wish I could have been there for her,” he said slowly, “the way she was there for us.” If she was dead, she had died alone.

“Why did you keep going back there, year after year?” a village woman asked him. “Because she saved you?”

“For that reason, and for many more,” he said slowly. “But I believe she knew the deepest reason of all.”

The group waited. He gazed into the fire.

“I fell in love with her the moment I saw her silver eyes.”

- “The Warrior in the Woods” | Fairy Tales of Remnant by E.C Myers 

 I would like to say more about this story but I’m afraid right now, all I can give are my first impressions. In a way, my mind is all a tizzy with how much this tale got me thinking in respect to the growth and potential future of the Rosegarden relationship.

I’m not trying to imply that I’m taking this as a sign of their endgame. Nah. That would be too premature of me. But it did get me thinking and excited for them in respect to Oscar’s continued development.

I think what I loved and enjoyed the most out of this tale is how much the Boy reminded me of my favourite little prince and how his endearing love for his Warrior made me think of how much Oscar looks to Ruby as someone to believe in and perhaps, even fall in love with.

And what got me the most was the line about the Boy wishing he could’ve been there for his Warrior the same way she had been there for him and by extension the people of his village.

That line hit me deep since that’s exactly how Ruby has been with Oscar from the moment the two met!

Out of everyone amongst the hero team, Ruby has supported Oscar the most from the start. She’s always stood by him. Looked out for him. Protected him and believed in him or supported him even when others were reluctant about that.

She was the first person to mention how brave he is in spite of his fears. And above all else, Ruby inspired Oscar to be a stronger person. Not just for himself and the huntsmen in his care; like his teammates. But for her.

The Boy was inspired by the Warrior to become a stronger man, not just for himself but also the people of his village. Not only that but I loved how the young man even wanted to be strong enough to support his Warrior too

“…I wish I could have been there for her,” he said slowly, “the way she was there for us.”

I love that. I love that line because it reminds me of everything I’ve been saying about Oscar and his inspiration from the Little Prince.

What was the lesson the Fox taught the Prince? Love and responsibility. To be responsible for the people who love and support you just as much as you love and support them.

I got the same vibe from this story from the relationship between the Boy and the Warrior. The sad reality is that the Boy never got a chance to be there entirely for his Warrior and thus she was believed to have died alone; never truly knowing the whole truth of how much she meant to him and how much he loved her.

This is a parallel that I’m hoping for in V8 in respect to Oscar’s side of the story with him on his own in Mantle with only Oz. I’m hoping that during his journey back to Atlas; Oscar comes to terms with his feelings for Ruby. What would even be amazing is if at some point, the tale of the Warrior in the Woods is brought to life and told in the main series.

I would absolutely love it if at some point Oz would tell Oscar the Tale of the Warrior in the Woods when the little prince starts thinking about his rose. Even better, what if…“The Warrior in the Woods” is how Oscar learns the “Fox’s lesson to the Little Prince”?

Imagine if…Oz, fairy tale and it through hearing that story and learning of the Boy’s dedication to his Warrior that it helps Oscar realize how much Ruby means to him!

Overall, what I’m mainly anticipating is for Oscar to come to terms with his true deepest feelings for Ruby. For me, I would love it if Oscar really is no different than the Boy in the fairy tale. 

What would even be more of a trip is if Oscar is a descendant of the Boy or meets someone in his travels who is related to that boy in the tale and it’s a story and lesson that’s been passed down throughout their family for generations.

I know that might be pushing it a little bit but it’s not a bad concept. Either that or…Oz is the one who tells Oscar the Tale of the Warrior in the Woods. It would make sense for Oscar to hear that tale through Oz since, ironically, isn’t he the one who compiled the Fairy Tales from Remnant book? Correct me if I’m wrong. I know his notes are a feature of the book.

Anyways,  either way, I want to see Oscar realize how much he loves Ruby and it’s his love for her that further fuels his drive to support and protect her.

The Boy never got his chance to be there to protect his Warrior. While he kept her legacy alive through her story, the sad truth is the Warrior died alone never knowing how the Boy felt for her.

This is something I’m expecting NOT to be repeated with Rosegarden. I want to see Oscar promise to Ruby that he will always be there for her; fighting by her side for the cause they both believe him: Saving humanity. And above all else, I want to see Oscar realize his love for his rose in the hopes of one day telling her that to her face.

While I don’t know if we’ll have Ruby return Oscar’s feelings. Regardless, this is what I’m anticipating to see at least for Oscar’s side of things and this fairy-tale gave me more believe for that. Then again, it’s just a story and only time will really tell for what the CRWBY Writers have in store for V8. But a squiggle meister can wonder and hope, right?

In the meantime, like I said, I’m excited for the official release of Fairy Tales of Remnant.

I don’t plan on reading any more of the previewed stories though. I don’t know about some folks, but for this squiggle meister, I more want to wait till the book is out so I can hopefully get a hard copy because I do want to own the book itself.

That way I can read it through, make notes of things and always have that stuff on hand when I want to make a point of analysis for future musings and headcanon posts. Plus I really want that book. This is one of the sure-fire times where RoosterTeeth will actually get my money. (Still waiting patiently on dem Oscar merch though).

So with that being said, I think “The Warrior in the Woods” will be the ONLY story preview I will read and talk about for now.

I know there are previews for the other stories available but I’d rather not read them now. I think I’ll wait for the full book to go through and give my official thoughts then. We’ll see. Until then, this is all I got to say for now folks.

~LittleMissSquiggles (2020)

[adhd-adept]

hi! i like your posts! they're real helpful

anyway a thing i need help with

i want to ask my dad for therapy because i think i might have adhd? and also some other shit

so basically

(this is going to be a long post)

back in summer 2020, i thought i might have adhd because i was reading some comics from adhd alien and the signs of adhd she shared seemed eerily familiar?

and i did some research and more signs came up and i thought i might have them?

and i found a therapist who specialises in adhd and other issues

but when i talked to my dad about it he was all "ADHD is only hyperactive idiots who are useless without meds" and he yelled at me for a while and I'm now basically scared of mentioning the topic up ever again

he brought me to some sessions, but i think once he said it was "so the therapist tells you you don't have adhd"?

anyway after the summer ended i couldn't get therapy again because school and busy

with the 2 week spring vacation coming up i was thinking of maybe asking him again? but I'm really scared and he probably won't take it seriously again...

signed,

an idiot

Hey! Thanks. I’m glad I can be helpful. I wanted to answer this right away, but it took me a little time because this question deserves a thoughtful response. This is going to be a long post.

[If anyone with more experience in situations like this has advice, I would welcome suggestions]

First things first! I don't think you're an idiot. This world can be hard to navigate even in the best of times, and I will never think you're foolish for needing a little help with anything that that entails!

Looking for a therapist is a great start! I’m glad that you are taking yourself seriously and taking steps to get help. That can take a lot of courage, and I’m proud of you for it!

Know that it may continue to take courage, and persistence - it can be really difficult to get an official ADHD diagnosis. I definitely have ADHD, and it actually took two tries when I got diagnosed around age 12, as the first doctor thought I had been perfectly attentive during the meeting and thus could not believe I was struggling with inattention elsewhere. My friend in her early twenties has been attending periodic doctor and therapist sessions for a couple months now, because the first doctor didn’t take her seriously, the second said she clearly had ADHD but sent her elsewhere for prescriptions, and the doctor they sent her to insisted she get a second opinion. She is finally starting to get accommodations, but it’s been an ongoing effort.

And you may simply not get along very well with your first therapist. You can always try reaching out to another. It can be a long process, and I hope saying that does not discourage you because there is a lot of good that comes at the end of that process; specifically, a better understanding of yourself and access to some resources that can help you seek accommodations for the things you struggle with.

It sounds like you’ve done your research on therapy, though. If you want any help with looking for a therapist, I am happy to help, (or at least try to). But it sounds like what you’re asking is how to approach the subject with your dad?

You’ll have to take some of my advice from here with a grain of salt; I’ve never been in the specific situation you’re in now, and of course I don’t know your dad as well as you do. But in my experience, rephrasing a request can do a lot to make it sound more reasonable.

I think the first step is understanding where he is coming from. Again, you have met the man and I haven’t, so this is more suggestion and guesswork than any kind of statement.

It sounds like your dad has a significant bias against neurodivergence. But I think it does matter WHY he feels that way. I can only imagine that it comes from a lifetime of hearing those things about ADHD from the people around him, and it will take time for him to reverse that prejudice. I feel sorry for him to have grown up in that hostile environment, and I am sorry that that hostility is being carried through to you.

But the result is that he thinks there’s something wrong with having ADHD. Of course, that isn’t true, but no parent wants to believe there’s something “wrong” with their child, and he will probably be resistant to the idea for as long as he believes that there is. 

More than that, I think parents don’t want to believe that, if there IS something wrong with their kid, it might have come from them. A child twisting their ankle in PE class or getting bitten by an ant is one thing - it hurts to see the child in pain, but it isn’t their fault. It’s much harder for a parent to see their child suffer because of a hereditary condition, because I think there can be a lot of guilt associated with that.

On top of that, if he’s been told that ADHD is a terrible thing, it might be disagreeable to him because if you have it then maybe he has it too. People don’t want to believe there’s anything wrong with themselves either.

I don’t know if that’s, on some level, why he reacted the way he did - and even if it’s true, I don’t think any of this justifies yelling at you for it. Nothing justifies that. And I want to be clear that it shouldn’t have to be your responsibility to figure out why he feels the way he feels - that should be on him, and it’s unfair to you to have to work through his issues on your way to getting the help you need. This isn’t necessarily the best or only approach. But trying to at least figure out why he feels the way he does might help you figure out how to approach the subject again. 

Maybe even ask him where he got his impression of ADHD, if it does not feel like doing so will start a new argument. (Maybe don’t mention the part where you’re asking because some stranger on the internet is trying to psychoanalyze him.) But I find, personally, that conversations go better when I can approach them with patience, and I have more patience when I make an effort to remember that the other person’s reactions have to come from somewhere, and if I can at least start out believing that they are misinformed rather than actively hostile.

I think a good start would be to try educating him about ADHD and see how that goes. Anything might sound scary because it is unfamiliar; or, worse, it might sound scary because it sounds vaguely familiar even if the only information you know is that you think someone said it’s scary. 

An aside, to give an example: There was a meme a while ago where water would be referred to as “dihydrogen monoxide” and framed as a dangerous thing with vague-but-technically-true statements such as “it’s a common byproduct of chemical reactions,” and “it’s found in our sewer systems”, or “it has the highest pH value of any acid” (you may recall that the strongest acids are those with a low pH value).

I think it’s easy to do the same with neurodiversity. If all you know about water is that it’s a chemical, it may sound scary. If all you know about ADHD is that it’s a mental disorder, it may sound scary.

Talking with him directly may be better than sending him articles - they tend to start with phrases like “mental health disorder” and “chronic condition”, or big (scary) jargon words that you might want to avoid if you want it to sound approachable (I mean, even the “Simple English” version of the Wikipedia article has the word “neurodevelopmental” in the first sentence).

I think it’s important for him to know that everyone’s ADHD experience is different - symptoms can be strong, or they can be very weak, but even people with very weak symptoms may benefit from seeking professional advice. You can be very “high functioning,” and still find certain tasks more difficult than most people do, and thus benefit from help even if you don’t “need” it to achieve your goals or lead a “normal” looking life.

You might tell him that a lot of ADHD treatment is about paying attention to your own behaviors and learning what works best for you - that even if you do not have ADHD, you may have some experiences in common with people who do, and that seeking a therapist who specializes in ADHD may help you find someone with the kind of attitude you are looking for; maybe you want someone who will be especially patient, and who will be prepared to take you seriously with the symptoms or traits you do have.

After all, most people can understand that you don’t have to have clinical depression to benefit from some of the behavioral things often recommended to people who do, such as getting regular exercise and more sunshine. You can do things that improve your mood even if you don’t have diagnosed clinical depression. 

Similarly, if you are seeking help with some things that people with ADHD struggle with - organization, time management, staying focused - a therapist who specializes in ADHD may be a good fit for you for that reason alone, even if you don’t have it.

And yeah, it sounds like he doesn’t want you to have ADHD, so I don’t think there’s anything wrong with saying “even if I don’t have it, talking to a specialist can help me rule that out,” if that’s what helps him feel more comfortable with you getting an appointment. Again, it will take time for him to overcome the negative impression he has now, but at the very least, if he forms a positive impression of ADHD therapists he might not be so hostile about ADHD itself.

Maybe remind him that there can be a lot of overlap between ADHD and other experiences, but that it seems like a good place to start seeking help because it is a relatively common cause of some of the things you’ve experienced.

Know how much you would be willing to compromise before you have this conversation - would you be okay with getting a therapist even if they do not specialize in ADHD? Would you be unlikely to get an appointment if he made it conditional on something like maintaining good grades? Have a clear, tangible goal in mind; while you may leave room for uncertainty in your diagnosis until you speak with a professional, you should try not to leave room for uncertainty in what you are asking for. Know what you want - a session (or a number of sessions) with a therapist - and have your reasoning for that ready, maybe even written down. People tend to take you more seriously when you can demonstrate that you’ve thought something through.

If you say you think you have ADHD, I believe you. But regardless of that, you have recognized that there is something you need help with, and you are taking action in response. I hope that, at the very least, if your dad does not want to take the suggestion of ADHD seriously, he can at least take you seriously when you say that you need help. 

And you will get help. You are moving in the right direction. Don’t lose sight of that.

I hope I’ve answered your question! If this is hard to read I can maybe come back and re-write it as a set of bullet points, maybe suggestions of things to say, but I felt that in the case of more personalized advice it was important to address the context of my advice. If you needed more specific advice, feel free to clarify. And of course, if you have any other questions, I’m always around.

Best of luck!