#and i realized i dont experience aesthetic attraction like i thought I did

[aroace-confessions]

i’m having a really hard time figuring out my sexuality and idk i just want to talk about it rn.

so, until about 6 months ago i thought i was a demiromantic ace lesbian. then i realized that i dont actually want to be in a relationship and dont want to do all the things associated with being in one, i just think women are really pretty, so now i just think of myself as aroace

so idk, i guess i’m just mourning?? not being a lesbian anymore?? bc it was such a big part of my identity for such a long time and i loved being part of that community. i wish i could still associate myself with lesbian labels and the lesbian community because i definitely experience aesthetic attraction to women and femininity but it would feel like i was tricking/cheating/doing something wrong if i did

idk im just super conflicted :(

Submitted 29/07/24

[n7punk]

Let Me Ride Fic Notes

These notes are going to be shorter/looser than usual, this was an utter lie and I don't know why I thought I could abide by it when I wrote it a month ago. Anyway, Let Me Ride is done and as always I have meta.

Epilogue Life:

It's all set up in the fic, but they start working on spending time together more, talking things out, and generally fixing their relationship. They still have more growing to do, and integrating their lives and new friendships is kind of a struggle, but they get there.

Catra focuses on street racing a while, which is honestly good for their relationship at first because Catra feels like her skill is finally respected, but it's also really dangerous. As she slowly gets brought on as additional help ("as needed") around the track, she also gets access to the track itself during downtime through favoritism, and though she finds street racing a lot more fun, she can also acknowledge it's a lot safer for both herself and others to race on the track. She never fully quits being a nuisance on the roads - and neither does Adora, even if she stops participating in organized races - but she does slow down ("You've made me boring," she accuses Adora. That kind of stuff), it just takes a while.

Entrapta and Scorpia keep living together for a while until Scorpia ends up meeting Perfuma through the track (context further in the notes) and they spark up a relationship.

Playlist:

Dressed To Kill by The Wombats, Disco Heart by Gia Woods, Lesbionic by Gia Woods, Pineapple Slice by Tove Lo, WET by Lauren Sanderson, uh oh by Tate McRae (again), Whiplash by Alex Cappelli, 20 Questions by Zolita (yeah, I know it's a cheating song and the hook-ups aren't actually a problem in here, but it's more the energy of "Oh, did you get everything you wanted? Was it worth it?" applied to Adora leaving), and finally: Kiss Goodnight by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME. (All of this capitalization is correct).

Chapter 1:

"Let me ride" is... well we all know what it is, but it's also Adora quite literally going "Angella please let me ride", being told no, and then going sulking - accidentally - right into Catra's arms.

I don't think I ever mentioned this, actually, but there's been a steady amount of motorcycle catradora art over the years that of course acts as the big inspiration/motivation for doing a motorcycle AU.

Adora says she "shouldn't" look at the magicat because she's expecting one of two outcomes: 1) it's some random magicat and she might be in for another painful experience like she talks about in Chapter 4, or 2) it actually is Catra and everything ends up hurting more. She wasn't expecting a third choice.

As implied later and unsurprisingly, Adora is autistic in this, hence her strong attraction to certain sensations and need for them or else she gets deeply unsettled. She's just the rare case of an autistic not bothered by sound.

I decided to go with naming the bikes Swift Wind and Melog partially because Swift Wind just made sense for Adora's bike but also because Melog's role in the show as, essentially, a therapy animal for Catra underscores how much of her mental well-being is coming from racing at that point in her life.

Chapter 2:

Neighorhoods like Glimmer's are far from standard where I live right now, but I have seen them here and there when traveling in both fancy and Very Average (or less) neighborhoods. There's no driveway in the front, so the front yards have ~aesthetic~ paths to the front door, and then there's a normal backyard and behind the back fence is a hidden driveway with a back street between the street rows to reach it. It kind of doubles the amount of street needed for a "single street" of houses since they have the "real" (for show) wide streets out front and then narrower backstreets between backyards.

Mentioning them using the strap facedown the first time was supposed to lowkey be a reference to toht, which was the first time I wrote strapping, only I just realized I'm actually thinking of the first strap scene in SLAS so... listen all the smut blends together.

This whole fic was supposed to be 20k and then chapter 2 alone ended up 9k because I couldn't control them and I realized I was a lost cause.

Chapter 3:

Adora speculates on it, but Catra cut her hair both because it was getting in the wound on her neck and making it hard to care for and because it changes her appearance pretty dramatically and makes her feel better about avoiding the Horde and the cops.

Of course Adora blames herself for Entrapta leaving. She's Adora. It's not like she's the newbie and no one who knew Entrapta better could do it either - no, she's the reason Catra found out about Entrapta, so it's her fault.

Adora genders her bike because she has pack-bonded with it, but Catra (though Extremely attached to her own bike) finds it weird to gender cars and the like.

Catra and Scorpia are staying at Entrapta's apartment because Catra ended up moving in with Scorpia after the breakup, and then they were worried about the Horde seeking retribution on them (rightfully) so they moved in with Entrapta since the Horde hadn't actually had reason to learn her address yet, and that way they could all be together to fight back if someone came after them.

Shadow Weaver betraying Catra and the Horde is a mirror of that arc from season two/three, but in this case Catra ended up fully banished because she was never given a path of redemption (even one that was intended to be a suicide mission so Hordak could keep Entrapta happy) and she's lowkey a shoot on sight order for the Horde, only the Horde doesn't really kill people, it's just that if they did she would be the first. She knows way too much and supposedly is already willing to work with the cops, making her a bigger risk than Adora was when she walked. She isn't actually in danger of being killed, but it's best she steers clear from the Horde in every way that she can.

Hordak "seducing" Entrapta wasn't like, real seducing for multiple reasons. In this AU, Hordak is focused on getting in with the Prime organized crime group to work towards expansion, so he hasn't worked with Entrapta but he is around the shop enough to know how useful she is and thus tried to convince her to stay. Part of that "seduction" was stuff like offering her better builds, which is better than sex in motivation for Entrapta lol. In the end, though, he was threatening to kill her friend for something Entapta couldn't see being Catra's fault. Entrapta was also pretty close with Catra and Melog was enough motivation on their own.

She was kind of missing the racers back at the track, too, and sticking with the Horde through this meant she had little chance of going back. While she was free to build without legal restrictions, monetary ones were a much bigger confining factor than they had been at the track, and she wasn't really allowed to do whatever she wanted on most customer cars since they asked for one thing and that was all Shadow Weaver and Hordak wanted to give them. Giving out upgrades for free is bad business, as is doing expensive upgrades that weren't asked for and holding the car hostage until they're paid for. The shop had downsides along with its benefit.

Catra was out in the garage for several minutes because she was 1) composing herself but also 2) looking over "Swift Wind" and inspecting what changes Adora had made (basically everything but the frame) and especially how careful she was when she removed things, looking to see if she left dents or scuffs on Catra's bike (for the most part she didn't because she was careful). It was her trying to determine how respectful Adora was when she took the parts (an act Catra considers disrespectful in itself, but she's aware at this point that Adora doesn't see it that way, so she wants to see how well she did treat it in the process).

Adora just happened to throw her jacket really well so it stayed hanging up on it all night. It seemed like the kind of stupid, jocky thing that Catra thought Adora would practice so she looked smooth when she took off her jacket and acted all effortless - probably flexing her muscles in the process, which would be impressive if they weren't already making out at that point.

When Adora says Entrapta "cuffed" Swift Wind it's not supposed to be racing terminology, but rather personal slang they use do to their origins in this fic, referencing being arrested and handcuffed.

Adora calls Swift Wind "one of the few things Catra has taken proud in", which is partially true, but mostly that's because she's never had the opportunity to do a lot of things she's proud of. Her mechanical skill is about all she has gotten and Swift Wind, being a long time project of her with lots of funds poured into it, and being the only vehicle she has worked on other than Melog that she "keeps", is in another league. It's also missing the context that Catra wasn't only upset about Swift Wind being taken apart because she was proud of her own work, but also because it was the only damn thing she has ever been able to do for Adora with how Shadow cornered them.

Chapter 4:

I was really hoping this would be the last chapter. So hopeful, in fact, that my chapter headings looked like this:

(Obviously I did not end up needing a Chapter 6, but whenever I make a doc I always include a few more chapters than I think I need because I know myself at this point. Also I wrote this bulletpoint before I was halfway through Chapter 4, so hubris really could have gotten me there.)

Obviously Adora isn't really a pillow princess but Catra likes to rile her up.

Catra is so boneless after taking care of Adora because she has been soothed right down to her soul by Adora giving everything over to her like that, trusting her in a way she now knows Adora has only ever trusted her. And then it's her turn 🥰

Adora's speculation was right. Part of Catra's planning was just general scheming behavior and she absolutely wasn't sore after breakfast - and wasn't even really that sore in Chapter 3 either - but letting Adora think that gave her an excuse for slow sex without admitting that's what she actually wanted.

I had so many ideas for when they were laying in bed (pre- and post-sex) in both this chapter and chapter 3, it was ridiculous. Like there's no way I could have used all of them and some of them contradicted each other anyway. That's part of why the smut in this surprised me: 90% of what I had outlined was cuddling and conversation, and then that did Not end up being 90% of the fic.

The "dark edge" to Catra's voice when Adora said her time with the other magicat was gross was her being 100% ready to kill the other woman if she had mistreated Adora.

Honestly my first A/N in the fic was more about the emotional growth these girls still need to go through than the... questionable decisions they have made. Adora is still in her "don't be a burden" mode, and Catra needs to grow into vulnerability more, although she makes good progress in the fic. The rest of that growth is set up by them finally getting back together. They have more to learn and they are going to fight, but after going through the breakup, they can handle it now.

Catra isn't trying to be mean about the plushie - honestly, it makes her affectionate - but it's extremely Adora and that makes her laugh.

When I say the unicorn's mane is "plastic" I mean like really shitty synthetic threads that straight up feel like plastic and tangle easily. That shit is all over "little girls'" toys and it's a nightmare both to touch and maintain.

Adora mentions buying the lingerie for herself because she's never actually worn it in front of anybody else and she didn't want Catra to think she'd done it for some hookup. She had a lot of issues post-breakup, including esteem issues, and it was Glimmer's suggestion. She has put it on once or twice but mostly relegated it to a corner. Post-making-up, however, it finally gets some fun use.

My outline for the end of the chapter was: ["let me drive you home?" "no you cant" BECAUSE SHES ALREADY HOME].

When Catra mentions going back to check on Entrapta, that's partially because Entrapta is getting increasingly more unhinged the longer she goes without work, and because she wants to go talk to her about coming back to the track so they can move onto the next phase of the plan now she knows she wants to go through with it.

Obviously the chapter title is in reference to how I was supposed to have everything wrapped up in the fourth chapter, but it's also kind of the thread throughout the entire fic, expecting every kiss and interaction to be the last.

Chapter 5:

I like the bookending of music being in the first and last chapter, the mentions of sound distortion being in both, and each one ending with them racing off together. I find that kind of thing fun.

Entrapta "isn't a threat" in that everyone at the track knows she would never do anything to hurt them. Girl can absolutely be a threat if she wants to be.

Entrapta hadn't come back to the track immediately because, after becoming friends with Catra and hearing all her rants about Adora, she realized she might not be welcome and they could be mad at her for abandoning them, something that had never occurred to her. It's an aspect of relationships that wasn't immediately obvious to her, but she's been misunderstood and outcast before, mostly in school when she was the subject of a misunderstanding, so it was just easier to not go back and tell herself she liked the freedom of doing whatever personal project she wanted. It was really starting to wear on her though and she wasn't going to be able to hold out for much longer. Catra knew that and getting Entrapta settled back at the track was also part of her agenda when it came to going home with Adora. Catra promised her she could come back that night, after Adora had texted, and she wasn't at all surprised when Entrapta wanted to go immediately, though she convinced her to wait until morning. It moved up the time table on her though and made it harder for her to plan past that in time, something she couldn't do before without seeing how Adora would react to her first.

Entrapta used a simplified ("for younger audiences") dictionary to fall asleep (if she had it her way, it would have been the full thing, but 1, her parents were the ones who had final say and 2, kiiiiind of hard to find audiobooks of the dictionary), one that was designed to introduce new words to kids/teens without going into a million variations of them. I decided this because when I tried to use a real dictionary, I couldn't find my physical one and online dictionary databases are like, a word and then 20 variants of it before moving onto the next one, which didn't really work well for the joke. I ended up searching "words that start with 'au'" on wordhippo and filtering it to common words and then using a couple of the unique words.

Catra went the club a few times without Adora showing throughout the year they were broken up, but like half the times she went without Adora showing were very recent, once she put this plan together and just needed to run into Adora to enact it. As Adora made partying more infrequent, it was harder to find her, but since Adora was also pretty consistent on which days she went, it wasn't all that hard.

I got an ask about what "The Scene™️" is for LMR, and I couldn't answer it 100% honestly then, but I can elaborate now. If you're new, The Scene is the scene (or scenes) that I consider the "big scenes" for the fic, things that really motivated me to write it in the first place or that a lot was building up to/riding on, or that are just a part of the fic I'm super excited for, whether that means to write or share it. For this fic, I had so much outlined that I was excited to write that it's hard to pick one, but if I have to narrow it down to Just One, the conversation in the kitchen where Catra reveals she's hooking up with Entrapta and they finally start to talk things out is probably the answer, with runner-up the scene in the observation deck where Catra reveals the events of the entire fic were planned. When I wrote chapter one at the very beginning, I didn't really do it with that context, but by the time I was doing the final edit I think I knew that was going to be the big reveal, so it has been a secret throughline from chapter 2 at the latest, depending when it happened and how you want to count it. The fic was both building to it, and could exist outside of it, because while it contextualized Catra's actions, before that it was just a hookup and growing fic, and that worked too, but I do think this is a pretty solid moment. I was really excited for all the cuddling and morning after conversation, though, so it's really hard to pick one and say that's it.

I just realized I never said it, but Scorpia got Catra the leather jacket (along with matching ones for her and Entrapta, though Scorpia's is actually a vest because finding one that fit her arms and worked with her spikes wasn't happening. Entrapta doesn't really wear hers because it's a Restrictive Sensation to her) after the stabbing as a bonding, here's-the-symbol-of-our-new-group thing, even though they didn't really have a new group, she was just trying to make Catra feel better about being kicked out of the Horde.

I also never said it in the fic because the scene mentioning it got cut, but the Horde isn't actually based out of Bright Moon, they're like an hour away over the city line to the next town, where Glimmer drove when she wanted to see street racing hoping to avoid people recognizing her (and Bow went with her to make sure she was okay). Catra came to Bright Moon downtown to dance the first time she ran into Adora because they just have a better scene there and then after that she kept coming back for her. It means it isn't too hard for them to avoid the Horde and their old life once they decide to move on.

Sea Hawk is a racer and Mermista is his girlfriend who he has been trying to convince to be his umbrella girl for ages just because he wants to show her off (in a "that's my girl!" way not in like, an objectifying way) but she's refused because that means publicly acknowledging she likes him, something she'll still deny to their friends when they catch them in the middle of making out.

Ok, so umbrella girls (or, apparently, just "the umbrellas" which is. insanely objectifying). I'm not going to pretend to know a lot about them, but I did google some stuff. I was introduced to them when I watched a MotoGP race to see what I was dealing with back when I was first planning this and there were tall supermodel ladies holding umbrellas over the racers before the race started to... protect them from the elements, I guess? Anyway, I don't know if they have to meet all these Requirements like cheerleaders, but it's my AU so I say that in Etheria they're Some Hot Lady who also does promo work for their racer/team and helps deal with sponsors. If you want to be more diverse (and/or get some publicity) you can pick a more unconventional choice like a dude or something. Perfuma is Adora's usual umbrella lady, and she's also a model with this basically being a sidegig she does because she finds the racing and racers hot. Also racing isn't a segregated sport on Etheria, which I'm Pretty Confident it is IRL.

Original Outline:

Surprising Nobody, Probably, this AU is actually two AUs combined. I had the backstory for Let Me Ride (MotoGP/street racing AU) with a few failed attempts at a story for it that never seemed that interesting to me (interesting to read, but not to write, at least not enough for me to actually do it) and I had what I called the "fuckboi drummer" AU, which is what half of the plot for this fic is, but that fic had no backstory or justification for why they were fighting and I just couldn't come up with one that matched the animosity between them, so the two ideas ended up fitting together well.

There were several original stabs at plot for LMR, but the most recent state of it before it became This was that Adora and Catra were both street racers, but they only had the one bike (Adora's bike) so Catra was mostly shoe-horned into the mechanic role, and when Adora got basically sponsored by Glimmer to become a real racer she was like "this is great, we'll move to Bright Moon and I'll pay for you to go to college and do whatever you want", not realizing what Catra wanted was to race and that had been totally discarded. Which like, still is kind of the backstory of the AU, just with some details changed.

The only plot I had after that was that Catra went solo in illegal races once Adora was gone and had her own fancy bike (thus not needing the one Catra built anymorer) and so Catra started tricking it out and eventually got sponsors. She was able to buy her way into low-level professional races and worked her way up through the circuit the traditional way instead of getting scouted and jumping straight to the big leagues. Aaaaaand that was mostly it. I took a couple stabs at coming up with a plot beyond "Oh Catra went up a rank and is getting one step closer to racing Adora" but nothing ever really materialized. At one point they were orphans who stole the bike and Adora was the only racer because they only owned one helmet lol.

For the fuckboi drummer AU, I'd been thinking for a while that Adora would like drums because it feels like hitting shit, and well, there's that TikTok, so I was bored waiting in the parking lot and basically started outlining the hook-up and morning after scenes with the vague idea that the backstory was they ran into each other again at a club and Catra is aware Adora has been hooking up ever since they broke up because she's a little broken inside. Catra comes home with her, they have one night together, and Catra Does Actually Leave in the morning.

The part that existed in the parking lot but that I was never planning on actually writing was that then a few days later Catra does a splice with one of Adora's TikToks - because Adora's drumming was vaguely plot relevant and she sometimes posts short drumming covers on her TikTok just for fun and the compliments she gets on her arms - where Catra sings the words that would go with that part of the song. The song in question was the one I was listening to in the car at the time, the chorus of "Good For Her" by Mothica. Adora comments back "this is so fucked up, Catra", leading to some mild internet drama since they both had a few thousand followers and people in the comments were like oo what 👀 Yeah I wasn't ever planning to write that TikTok part but I was bored XD After that Catra comes around for a second time and this time she stays and there's all that morning after stuff.

When I went to actually write the fuckboi drummer AU, it got condensed down to meeting at the club and going home together with Catra staying permanently after that and all the morning after type stuff. Of course, as I went to write it I found I needed a legitimate backstory, and that's when the "all backstory" AU combined with the "I'm bored in the parking lot" AU and we got the final version of Let Me Ride with at least a bit of an overarching plot in Catra secretly planning it all.

[techhole]

im in a state right now where im not sure whether to call myself objectum if im only aesthetically attracted to monitors and cables. i *am* a robot sex fan through and through numero uno. ive been extremely into old magazines with vintage computers and im lowkey highkey obsessed at the moment. how did you find out you were objectum?

oooh very interesting... im gonna have to ramble a lot to dig into this.

from what you've told me though it seems to me like the feelings you're experiencing definitely fall under technophilia at the very least.

attraction is a messy, highly personal and different for everyone kinda concept, so honestly i think you can call yourself objectum if you feel like you want to be a part of the community. its not like anyone is gonna be mad if you change your mind later.

real life robots are objects, after all. and if you're only attracted to fictional robots well i have great news because being attracted to fictional things can also be a part of being objectum. fictional characters arent physical objects but they are non-sentient concepts, so it can fall under the same umbrella, especially if that character is a robot.

as for your last question, i actually found out i was objectum when I was like 13. i found out it was a thing through a fanfic someone wrote about a character being objectum, though the only terminology I knew at the time was objectosexual. i thought the idea of having a relationship with an object sounded really nice, and realized i had similar romantic feelings for a blanket of mine. dated my then laptop for a few years after that too.

technology is so beautiful and amazing, the science of it is so intricate it's almost like real life magic. i personally find that beauty to be sexually tantalizing, and find the relationship between technology and user to be borderline homoerotic and romantic.

your experiences and feelings dont have to match up with mine at all to be valid though, so please dont poison the well of your heart with any thoughts like that.

my advice is to try things out, even if you may feel a little bit silly at first. because really, thats the worst of what could happen, and figuring yourself out a bit more is always worth it.

[ifyourereadingthisblinktwice]

slight vent but not really more if me being confused and sad about being aroace

i thought i was aroace because of the lack of attraction towards other people. never had a crush, never liked anyone. but even now, it is something i want. i want to be in a relationship with someone. part of me likes the idea of it. part of me even likes the idea of sexual aspects of a romantic relationship. however. i don't even know if i like anyone, if i ever have. i want to like someone. every new person i meet i wait for something, thinking that maybe theyre the one. and they never are. even fictional characters. i called myself a lesbian for a while, because i thought i liked women. i don't know if i ever did. i dont know if i just liked the aesthetics of certain character design, or was just trying to convince myself i was experiencing attraction. i don't know if any reactions i have to female characters are genuine. part of me feels im just pretending, that if i act like i feel something beyond a general appreciation for the art and design, then one day it would be real. it hasn't become real yet. i want it to be real. i want to fall in love with someone, even if just to say that i did it, it happened. but i dont think it ever will. romantic love is still nothing more than a concept that i dont know if i will ever be able to grasp. its so concrete in terms and feelings and proper ways to do it and feel it. i understand it in ways that are foreign and clinical. as something to be studied and examined. i understand it as something tangible, and i know that it exists, and yet i know nothing about it at all. it has complexities that i dont know if i will ever be able to understand, because dont know if i will ever be able to experience it. i want to just say im aroace and be done with it, but i cant. i want this to be something i can actually identify with and be proud of in some regard. but i can't because a part of me still wants to fall in love, romantically. i'm still waiting for the switch to flick on in my brain, but my brain hasn't realized that the switch doesn't exist, and keeps waiting for a moment that will never happen.

[golisopod-mutual]

I took a (short) break away from labels bc I was driving myself nuts trying to identify and categorize my every feeling into neat little check boxes. So I stepped away and just gave myself some room to breathe, ig.

Anyway I'm identifying as just aroace now, not oriented/bi aroace.

[pluviophile-imagines]

Could I ask what your sexuality headcanons are? I love comparing mine with other peoples’!

Ok second half of this; this is just like. non-students who i Actually have thought about HJBAFV not at all a comprehensive list. Again disclaimer i write all these chars as bi in my fics, also i am bi myself so the vast majority are also bi, and also leaving a lot of these vague so u can imagine ur favorite ship or urself or w/ever

ok lets start this off with Aizawa. I think....... hes another one who's rlly unlabelled, doesnt super care to think it through and define it, but calls himself gay bc his interest in women is very, very rare and it's just way easier to say than explain all that. Definitely do buy into the idea that he had a crush on Oboro in hs but i do NOT buy into the easermic agenda sorry. Definitely not someone who goes looking for dates, but doesn't say no if someone asks him and hes interested (also im not gonna give her a whole section but i saw a hc a while back that the Ms. Joke stuff is literally that shes a lesbian and hes gay and shes fucking with him and i love that so much i just wanted to put it out there)

on the topic of the erasermic agenda: Hizashi's pan and knew it before HS, had a sudden & intense crush on Aizawa for the first month they knew each other and then immediately got over it in favor of a similar sudden, intense, and then immediately fading crush on Midnight. Hizashi and Aizawa r just rlly good friends imo; maybe they messed around for a bit in their twenties but it never went anywhere serious. He dates around a lot, not even necessarily to settle down just to have some fun

Midnight is aro/ace but does get in qprs & gravitates towards women wrt that. Most people dont read vigilantes but theres a woman in that, Kazuho, who i imagine she's been in a long-term qpr with; her relationship with aizawa and hizashi leans a little more towards a qpr than a normal friendship, too, but it's not rlly defined that way

All Might is married to justice queer but v much not interested in relationships. He and that one guy from the first movie are ABSOLUTELY exes and i won't hear otherwise; it's the only relationship he's ever had, and they broke up bc he had to go back to japan. He was heartbroken but did eventually get over him; his lack of romance afterwards is from genuine disinterest and not being hung up on his past. I can see him finding someone else in his later years, after he's retired. Definitely feels like he's not worthy of it tho

Hawks is bi but unfortunately didn't get to figure that out until like Now in the timeline...... if youll let my dabihawks history shine through i think dabi was the reason JHBASFGJHB he was basically brainwashed by the commission to become a hero so he didnt have time to Figure That Shit Out; he knew he was into women bc that was easy & what the commission expected from him but then he started this undercover assignment and met dabi and realized Oh...... Fuck. Hawks is hard tbh, bc i think between the control that the commission has over him and his own convictions as a hero he doesn't pursue any romance (tho he does get crushes or find people attractive) and most of his flings are done to keep up his prettyboy act, not out of genuine interest in being a fuckboy. Can't imagine him having a relationship until well after canon but I do see him being interested eventually

Onto the villains, Shigaraki is unlabelled but probably would call himself queer if asked. Definitely admires women more but isn't very interested in romance; AFO actively encourages him to pursue the things interested in so imo if he were he'd talk abt it more lmfao. I kinda see him as demi as well, not the type to fall immediately but requiring a friendship beforehand; tho unlike Bakugo as i said in my last post I dont think it happens suddenly but rather slowly. Y'all know im a big fan of shigaraki being absolutely whipped for his s/o so i do thing hes a big piner, tho he's also pretty bold and unashamed of his affections. I'm a big fan of him falling for a member of the league or a civilian; definitely can't see him falling for a hero unless the hero was already halfway to turning sides already. I think he's also attracted to intelligence and someone who pushes him to think more abt his ideology...... maybe im just projecting at this point JSHDFBVAJKSHD but my point is that the gender of his partner is definitely the least of what he considers/notices

Dabi is bi and, here's my bold take, demisexual; not interested in sex unless its with someone he loves. Absolutely doesn't even think abt romance for most of the years where he's on his own. He's got revenge to plan. By the time he joins the league that hasn't changed much, and he's demi so he's not interested in sleeping around, plus he rlly denies any attachment to people at all. As I said in that other ask tho I do rlly like the idea of him with Magne, so I think they have a fling for a bit before her death :( it's one of the things that leads him to isolate himself further, unfortunately, even from Jin and the other League members with whom his relationships aren't romantic. I can see him dating someone post-canon bc i think hes gonna be redeemed lol. It could be someone he knew before but they probably didnt date again bc he was v guarded; i think magne was rlly the only person he dated

Magne is pan and heres the kicker: I think shes t4t, which led to a little moment just before she and dabi got together where he was like "she wouldnt be into me :/" but she was into him anyway so all was good. She got around in her circles, mostly casual stuff tho she yearned for something more serious.

Spinner's bi & trends towards women but does occasionally get things for men and they're almost always intense. He thought he was straight for a while even once he joined the league and then suddenly got a crush on Shigaraki (around the time of MVA) and realized otherwise LMFAO he's definitely a hopeless romantic type, the whole mutant prejudice thing makes it rlly hard for him and i can see him being rlly happy with another mutant-type; i feel like as he matures he starts to gravitate towards them

Toga is canonically pan to my understanding, iirc her interest in Uraraka and Deku is the same (and romantic) in canon tho i might be wrong. Poor girl just needs therapy. I like the idea of the two of them becoming her friends over her being involved with them but i totally can get behind her having a thing with Uraraka (and maybe Tsu) at some point post-canon (presuming she gets redeemed), tho I think a qpr between the two/three of them would be longer lasting. And again presuming she gets therapy i can see her settling down with someone, gender irrelevant

Jin is unlabelled bc he hasn't much thought abt it, definitely had a thing for dabi and for hawks which does make me sad on both counts. I think he likes women slightly more abstractly/aesthetically and gets crushes more on men,. The dabi thing fades as they get closer and start to view each other as brothers. In his later years he doesn't rlly care about romance, I think he enjoys the experience of crushing but doesnt like dating people; his found family in the League is far more important to him. But i can see him falling head-over-heels for someone quite suddenly and having a bit of a whirlwind romance. Also someone for whom gender isn't much of a factor

Mr Compress is also queer and also hasn't rlly thought abt it. Definitely leans more towards women; he's like 30 but i like to think he also goes for older partners, 10 or 15 years his senior KJBADSJFHB idk he just has that Vibe with the way he calls himself an old man etc. A lot of the league i cant see sleeping or dating around much, i feel like they prioritize each other, but I do think mr compress gets around more than the others. i can see him having a bit of a fuckbuddy who he catches feelings for

Kurogiri is fun; as Oboro I do think Aizawa's crush was reciprocated, tho he wasn't around long enough for them to act on it :( he's bi, tho kurogiri isn't supposed to have personal interests. I like to imagine the brainwashing isnt as good as AFO wants it to be tho so I like the idea of him falling for someone anyway. I also like the idea of the heroes managing to undo the nomufication and I 100% can see him, aizawa, and someone else (someone he was involved with as Kurogiri) ending up in a triad as a result of aizawa and the third partner helping him through the aftermath of all that shit

Lady Nagant is a manga-only minor character but im in love with her so imma talk abt it. Shes bi and leans VERY heavily towards women, probably spent years questioning whether she was rlly bi or a lesbian before finally having a fling with a guy that she genuinely enjoyed. Has only ever been in long-term relationships with women and I v much think she has a gf at home who stayed even when she was arrested 🥺

Finally imma talk abt Natsuo bc i love that boy. He's one of the few unmarried chars with a love interest and he canonically has a gf. I do see him as IDing straight in canon ngl, but the kind of straight where he might actually be bi but his preference leans so heavily towards women and he grew up in a bad home so he just doesnt rlly think abt it bc hes v happy with women anyway. In shiganatsu thoughts shigaraki is the first man he has a thing for; i rlly can see the two of them in a triad with a woman specifically, who helps the two of them find each other and is the one who initiates bc its definitely a weird situation for natsuo

[fyodorz]

Hi! Would love a bsd matchup! I am a bisexual 20 yr old girl, i dont have a gender preference, and am up to date with the anime and manga, but i would prefer someone who is my age or older. I'm an infp-t and i'm shy at first, but when around those i am comfortable with i can be very childish (but i am serious when i need to). I am very loyal and i try my best to help those around me, but my anxiety sometimes prevents me from actually reaching out to help. I am 5'4, petite (1/2)

HI! Hello, you've been so patient with me I appreciate it very very much. I decided to try and shake things up for this, mostly for aesthetics. I made headers for myself!

Without further ado! I pair you with: Ranpo Edogawa !

I bet you thought you were gonna get Poe! But no, it was him! Ranpo!

I see Ranpo as a ENTP! He would totally move you out of your comfort zone as an extrovert. He would also help you think more with your brain rather than your heart. I give you Ranpo in this regard for the same reason as to why Ranpo meshes so well with Poe. Because opposites attract! Of course Ranpo would like someone who could match his intelligence, but I think you could definitely teach him a thing or two about emotional intelligence, rather than logical intelligence due to your FP.

Ranpo would nudge you out of your shell. He would in general be someone that you could hang around and easily get really comfortable with. We saw how quickly Ranpo got Yosano to open up during Dreaming of Butterflies while Mori and Fukuzawa were having a custody battle over her. If he could get someone like young Yosano to open up quickly despite all she's gone through, that must mean he has a very comforting presence. (Even if he is really loud and childish.)

Speaking of childish! You and Ranpo would get along since you're both pretty childish. There's also, of course, the hijinks that would ensue from you two just being in the same room together. And like you, Ranpo can be serious when the situation calls for it. Such as when he confronted Mushitaro and said that he would turn himself into a demon for the sake of the safety of the agency. (Can we talk about how cool that scene was?)

Additionally, both of you are extremely loyal. Ranpo is loyal to a fault, especially to Fukuzawa. His entire character arc during the Decay of Angels arc is realizing that Fukuzawa's word isn't absolute and that he has to learn to make decisions for himself. He got a big wake up call when he realized Fukuchi was Kamui and then was attacked by him. Since he thought he could trust Fukuchi since he had known Fukuchi since the opening of the agency, as well as Fukuchi being Fukuzawa's best and childhood friend. I can't tell if you are loyal to a fault, but something tells me you are, just a bit.

Ranpo would very much enjoy that you're shorter than him. He would totally use your shoulders as an arm rest and tease you relentlessly about it. He would probably pick you up to. And I don't mean try. That man easily lifted a heavy ass safe in Dead Apple. He is not a noodle. He would lift you, no hesitation.

At least with dating Ranpo, you get to befriend Poe! (And Mushitaro, I am in love with that stupid dramatic bitch) You, Poe, and Ranpo would have little movie nights and reading sessions where you and Ranpo read over Poe's latest manuscript. Ranpo would let you read first to see if you could solve it before he could! There's also the possible thrill of Ranpo requesting Poe put you two in the story so you can experience it first hand!

Ranpo would be interested in your drawings and I can totally see him as someone who enjoys watching people draw. He would also share his snack stash with you since you both love sweets. Also please let him read your writing! He would give helpful tips on things you may need to work on since you're starting out! (He toootttaaally didn't learn it from Poe, no sirree.)

As for wearing cutesy things, please let Ranpo dress you up! He would have so much fun! He would take you shopping (probably with Yosano since he isn't very good at clothes shopping, he just likes the way things look.) If your bed is filled with plushies Ranpo is totally gonna bury himself in them, you cannot stop him. He will be consumed by the plushie pile.

Finally, you like animals? Great. So does Ranpo. You guys are gonna adopt so many stray cats. Wouldn't surprise me if you guys picked up Natsume one day. He probably wouldn't mind.

All in all, you and Ranpo are similar enough to the point of where you would get along, but also different enough to learn and grow from each other. That's one of the most important things in a relationship.

Requests: Open

Whew! Hope that was worth the wait! It's late for me and I gotta go to class in the morning, so this'll be the only one I'll do tonight, but I'm hoping I can will myself to work on the inbox on the weekend!

Thanks so much for the request and let me know how I did!

[nobody-knose--archive]

well i got home a lot earlier than i thought i would today, which i’m happy for seeing as the place was filled to the brim with people not wearing masks. like this place is normally decently busy this time of year but it was packed to the goddam brim today for some reason. anyway! i took pictures of the place for reference, and whenever i get around to carving the pumpkins we picked out i’ll share pics of that as well. this is lowkey going to be an advertisement for the place because if you ever visit the central valley you really should come around here, especially if you are/have kids it’s amazing. starting from the top.

[image description: a picture of a creek bluff. in the foreground are some ground brush cast in shadow. in the middle ground is some long yellow grasses in patchy sunlight taking up the space where a creek would run if there was rain around here (california). slightly up the hill is a small footbrigde connecting a path that goes from left to right along the side of the bluff. just behind it in the background is the side of a small hill that’s covered in the same long yellow grass from before, and the sky is clear and blue where at the top of the bluff. scattered throughout are oak trees, some small and young, and a few that are old, tall, & mighty. end image description.]

y’all are so lucky i managed to get pictures without people there were so damn many. my older brother was freaking out the entire time about catching corona (he’s nd but he’s in denial about it) and ive decided that for the sake of this post & onwards i’ll be referring to my older brother as Idon & my younger brother as Dr. Lion given that those are dumb unused nicknames we have for each other and it’s easier than referring to them as my older & younger brother all the time. anyway the whole area is set up in this lil creekbed area and normally when it’s winter & it’s not hot n stuff (twas decently hot today, tshirt shorts & no jacket weather in the sun) there’s a bit of water that runs through it. the rest of the time it’s dry and people will walk straight to it to get to the bluffside trail that features a handful of small attractions like a tiny castle, tunnel, metal slide, & other things that appeal to all the children that can fit in them. this place is basically the hotspot for any and all children in this county youve just gotta come here some time it’s so damn fun. there’s even a swinging rope bridge over the creek that leads to the bluffside trail that’s raised way up in the air and is an honestly harrowing experience for every kid who goes across it i could talk about this place for hours. i havent even brought up the train line that goes around the tree farm & things at the top of the bluff. anyway

[image description: a picture of a pumpkin patch, taken from behind a few stalks of corn. the field is full of pumpkin plants with their large, green leaves extended into the air, though there’s no pumpkins visible. there are various flowers i believe to be carnations dotted throughout the patch, in shades of  light pink, magenta, orange, and red, and a few stalks of corn also grow in the patch. in the distance a field of corn that doubles as a small maze grows off to the right, and lining the background is a row of large trees that grow along the creekbed behind them. the sky is bright blue & clear from the upper left part of the picture it can be seen in. end image description]

so one attraction of this place (one thing that gives it such an appeal to people who want aesthetic pictures for instagram & whatnot) is that they always set up little pumpkin people all over the place, taking various poses. when i say pumpkin people i mean basically scarecrows, clothing stuffed with straw & posed doing things, but with pumpkins for heads. most of them are out of the way enough that people cant mess with them but can take pictures like i did here. oh can you not see it? well let me just zoom in for you-

[image description: a zoomed in picture of the scene described above. clearly shown is a scarecrow-type figure with a pumpkin for a head standing up in the field. it’s wearing a rather nondescript grey shirt, blue jeans, and a floppy brown farmer’s hat. it’s surrounded by pumpkin plants, carnations, & corn stalks, with a corn field to the back & more large trees casting shadows to the back, as indicated above. there are also some large leaves from corn plants directly in front of the camera where it’s taking the picture, taking up a large chunk of the picture. end image description]

here it is! this is the only one i took a picture of because it was the only one i could possibly find the time to capture without it being swarmed by other people. i was really lucky to take these pictures without anyone in the background here it’s honestly hard to tell from what i’m showing but there was an obscene amount of people there, hence why we barely spent 1.5 hours there. i suspect idon’s unending stream of complaints and fretting and honest request to tell every member of our extended family that we’d have to quarantine for the next 2 weeks got us out a bit faster than we wouldve otherwise done but eh. that stuff’s especially ironic considering dr lion’s going back to physical school starting this week but hey what can ya do. we wore our masks. homemade by my mother because she had nothing better to do the first few weeks of quarantine and now i’m just rambling about my home life. moving on

[image description: a picture of a string of lightbulbs, focused on one in particular that’s completely shattered. behind, various trees, oaks being the only ones i can name, fill up almost the entire background. blue sky can be seen through the branches of a tree to the upper right portion of the picture. for the most part only the lightbubs & the tree closest to it, taking up the rightmost portion of the photo, are illuminated by the sun. end image description]

this is making me realize i didnt take many good pictures. i only took this one because ive got a story behind it but hey i’ll be coming back this winter to pick out a pine tree probably bc they double as a pine tree farm as well as a pumpkin patch and general creekbluff attraction so i can get some better pictures of the area when there’s less people. hopefully. anyway you see how that lightbulb’s broken? well i being the lil aspiring biologist i am saw a bone lying in the dirt next to our car when we were leaving and immediately picked it up. it was picked clean, almost certainly by ants or something, and i was kinda hoping it was the product of some owl because there are a lot of those in the area around the creek, but my family decided twas but the product of some other family’s picnic there. what it was doing in the parking lot i’d love to know, but i couldnt bring it with me (”that’s disgusting” it’s picked clean dirty & dusty lying in the dirt i guarantee it’s not got anyone’s dna on it any more but that of the chicken it came from) so i take a step closer to the treeline to throw it away. and then of course where does it go after i release it from my hand but directly into one of the lightbulbs hanging up by a string all along the outside of the parking lot. whoopsy. so of course i take a picture as soon as i’m done explaining it to my family & freaking out about doing actual damage to this beloved creek pumpkin patch/pine tree farm. then we have a brief argument on whether to tell the staff about it (there’s actual broken glass what else can we do) and so we drive up to the guy sitting there watching people leave, giving directions, our mom rolls down the window, and i, on the opposite side of the car from him, barely get out a proclamation along the lines of “there’s a broken lightbulb down in the parking lot with glass on the ground” he says “ok sure” and we leave. it takes me like 5 minutes to calm down from that which i dont get because we do a whole expedition up to the top of the bluff to see the construction theyre doing to the train line that theyve been working on for years & we dont even get out of the car to walk around because a. social distancing we already took off our masks & they have to be tied on it’s too much work to put it back on and b. the sheer number of cars there was menacing so we just sorta drove around and glanced down the side of the bluff to the best of our abilities. god that’s a damn paragraph. it’s been an hour. <3 i guess

[raavenb2619]

hello! so i don’t know how to word this but basically...i haven’t felt a romantic attraction in a while. and i’m not sure if i am pushing down those feelings and ignoring anything romantic for some particular reason. i’ve also noticed that i dont find people as “handsome” or “stunning” as before - i’ll understand that someone is aesthetically pleasing, but that’s it. i also used to get crushed on fictional characters and celebrities all the time but now i dont, which is...unusual, i guess (1)

(2) i haven’t had a crush in a while but i’ve realized that the last 3 people i crushed on were all forced because i thought that i had to have a crush on them. same goes for my first proper “crush” ever; i thought i needed to like them, so i did for the longest time, but i’m not sure how “reliable” those feelings were since 1. we rarely talked and 2. it was all basically scenarios in my head. basically, what i’m trying to say is, why do i not feel attraction as strongly as i used to?

There are a couple reasons this could be. First, it’s entirely possible that you’re feeling attraction more or less the same way as you used to, but you have a different perspective on it. When I realized I was aro, and that my “crushes” were really just “squishes”, it took me a bit of time to reestablish the standard of what my experiences of attraction were actually like. If you recently learned about aspec ideas or realized that you’re aspec, this might be what’s happening, especially if your last three crushes were more or less forced due to external pressure. 

Second, it’s entirely possible that your experiences of attraction are actually weaker now than they used to be. That’s okay. People and experiences and identities can change over time, due to a number of reasons, like internalized ideas or external pressures, and sometimes these things change for no discernible reason. It might change again, or it might not, but if you find that aspec labels are helpful for you to understand yourself and describe your experiences, you’re welcome to use them for as long as you want. 

Hope that helps, as always feel free to ask for clarification/any follow up questions. 

[ayy-spec]

Anything to Add?

The final question in this survey was a write-in section for people to leave any additional comments. 113 people responded.

Important/Particularly Interesting Comments

• I hope this goes well for you because you seem nice and if you have any advice for new to the community 15 year olds like me, don't be afraid to share because I'm trying to embrace my sexuality as much as possible but it can be hard when I don't know where to go or turn to to find what I'm supposed to do and where to ask questions and just fully embrass this part of me and it can be hard when I don't even know many if any aspecs so representation is great and it is helpful to hear your experiences and how you handle certain parts, so just keep doing what your doing because it is making a difference [note: 🥺🥺😭]

• i often consider myself more as just aroace rather than aro and ace seperately so i prefer seeing the blue and orange aroace flag over the individual aro and ace flags

• I don't really shorten my identity often with aroace, only when im feeling very romance repulsed and its been a while since I felt romantic attraction. I am a pan-demiromantic asexual. My pan label makes me feel more connected to the lgbt+ community bc it feels like my nonbinary and intersex status doesn't count either. I know I belong in the queer community, but the lgbt+ community is so sexual orientation focused.

• Thank you for having a wide variety of labels to choose from in the options!! I don't see the term aegoromantic very often on things, it feels nice to be known I guess haha

• Thank you for this, i recently started thinking about being in arospec and it was so relieving, all this time i thought something was wrong or maybe i was broken. I'm still trying to learn more about it, and I'm grateful for people willing to teach and help

• didn't realize I hadn't experienced sexual attraction until I finally did and was like "OH, no wonder all my other relationships felt like I was playing pretend"

• I dont often tell people I'm gray aroace. Not because of shame or it not being "as important" (I'm a gay trans dude) but I think because I just feel its a very intimate part of myself, as well as my romanticism and sexuality (in terms of like asexuality) feeling as though it doesn't always need a label. I'm fine just being myself most of the time, a lot of labels can be tricky for myself I think. I'm happy the label exists nonetheless though because Its nice to know I'm not the only one who feels like this.

• I'm queer! But if I'm getting down to the bones of it, I'm pan/ace. Still relearning how to be proud of that, after The Grand Clusterfuck years back.

• even though I would be considered to have an alloromantic orientation, alloace isn't really a term I feel any strong connection or attachment to

• i'd like to add that i do consider myself alloaro and use that label openly but i'd also not consider myself 100% allosexual. i'm questioning my sexuality but even if i do end up feeling more solidly ace-spec i'd still use the alloaro label

• Idk who else does this or if this is interesting enough to write down, but I thought I would! I use Aroace as a label. Other, smaller labels inside that would probably fit me better! Aroace feels too big, like it doesn't *really* define exactly who I am. But at the same time, I prefer using it because more people know what Aroace means (at least compared to myrromantic and myrsexual). I use Aroace so the public can define me. I don't typically use it around my close friends 'cause they already know my idiosyncrasies and where I really am. They already made their own definitions for me, so I don't have to make one for them!

• I'm still figuring myself out, so I leave myself at the blanket terms and hopefully everything'll work out in the end

The rest of the responses are below:

Comments Alerting Me About Typos (that I was then able to resolve)

• There's a typo in your "sexual orientation labels" question, because you have Aroflux listed and not Aceflux, but I didn't want to confuse things so I put Aceflux (which I do use) under Other. I also am polysexual (I flux between polysexual and asexual but I am always aegosexual) but didn't know if I should but it under Other anywhere since it's not an acespec label. I consider my polysexuality tied to me being aego/aceflux though, which is why I mention it here.

• the sexual orientations options are the same of the romantic ones ( for example, there's arovague and arospike in the sexual cathegory)

People Clarifying/Expounding Upon Their Own Identity/Experiences

·  to clarify: i'm unsure whether or not i am demi or aceflux; so i use graysexual since both labels technically fall under that as an umbrella term.

• I’m still a confused gorl and I really only know that I don’t like sex it sexual acts but I do like romantic and sensual acts

• Sex/romance repulsed and I have aesthetic attraction

• I'm also animesexual and fictosexual (and romantic I guess but I don't like using the SAM for myself).

• I have never seen most of these labels, haha, I expect one of them is the one I always forget that's for being aro due to past trauma but people always assume it's romantic/sexual trauma so I don't use it and thus have forgotten it...but that's the essay I'm not usually up for writing: was biromantic but then had several awful life events on top of each other and had a complete breakdown and have been aro since. Unclear if it's permanent but it's been 14 years now. [note: I believe this person is thinking of caedromantic]

• I tend to use the word ace more than asexual because it's shorter, but I don't feel more favorably about one than the other.

• i can't tell the difference between platonic vs romantic attraction, and am unsure if people i have "liked" in the past was romantic, platonic, or a fake stemming from peer pressure.

• Also Gender-Neutral/Agender

• I’m gray-aro but identify more with being biromantic even though I know I’m aro-spec. As for sexual orientation, I’m just completely ace xD

• The fact I'm still trying to figure out my gender makes it harder to pinpoint exactly what my orientations are :( but I usually say I'm queer, and if it's safe: Bi Ace, and if I can get more specific: biromantic grey-asexual

• I also use a platonic label (biplatonic). I use it not in a friendship way, but more like in a QPR way.

• Thank you for doing this! My identity on the aro/ace spectrums has shifted a lot over the years and while I’ve just settled on aroace and queer for the most part, this community is so diverse and under appreciated. People who find joy in/identify with micro-identities are valid and deserve representation!

• I'm still figuring out my romantic orientation but it's looking less allo by the day lmao

• My romantic label is very fluid, but in terms of sexual labels, very sex repulsed Asexual

• Content with just Aspec cause it's difficult to pinpoint anything but cool with both asexual/ace and aromantic/aro

• I think of my romantic orientation as halfway between aromantic and homoromantic

• I'm a polyamorous ace, if there'd be a way to include that sometimes that'd be neat :)

• I am still questioning my identity

• I used to identify as 100% ace but now I have no idea other than that I seem to be pan-ace in some way shape or form so my identity is ???people???

• Sex/romance repulsed and I have aesthetic attraction

• to clarify: i'm unsure whether or not i am demi or aceflux; so i use graysexual since both labels technically fall under that as an umbrella term.

Queer Rights

• Trans rights, baybee 🤠🦂

• I just hope a-spec and aro-spec people will experience less negativity and hate this year <3

• Aspec rights!!

• aspec rights, baby

People Being Nice to Me  (I appreciated this thank you everyone!!)

·  :)

• Have a good day

• Uhhh, cool survey, nice to see a lot of labels.... good job! Nothing I have to add, it was great

• Have fun chief, thank you for your work

• Thank you for creating!

• thanks for the survey! I don't know too many aspec in person so I love participating in things like this about the ace/aro community!

• Thank you for what you’re doing

• just hi :)

• thanks!!

• I really love your blog! Reading your posts always makes me happy :) [note: thank you!]

• Good luck, have a nice day !

• I hope you're having a good day :)

• you're lived and valid af!! have a great day!!!

• Thank you for all your hard work i really appreciate it ☺️

• Drink some water Right Now OP

• Nope, :> hope the best for you.

• Cool survey, 10/10 would survey again.

• 💛

• Have a nice day uwu

• Nope! Have a nice day!

• Thank you for making pride flag edits! They're really nice! [note: thank you!!]

• nope, but this is really cool!!

• ❤️

• Have a good day.

• I think this survey idea is super cool! Definitely a great way to see what sort of aspec people are on tumblr :)

• You are doing the lords work

• Thank you for asking us.

• good luck!

• This is really cute idea :)

• I hope you're having a nice day!

• Good luck in your endevours!

• Thank you for making our community visible!

• Have a good day :3

• Have a good day!!

• Keep doing great stuff!

• Thank you for all the positivity I get from your blog! It's super helpful, keep it up :) [note: thank you!!]

• thanks for doing this. recognition is always nice

• Have fun <3

• Lots of love 💛

• This is a cool project, thanks for doing it and good luck! :)

People Saying They Love Me (and I love you, random a-specs)

·  i love you OP!!!!!

• love you, hope you have a great day

An A-Spec Person Being Rude to Other A-Specs

• If you enjoy sex with your romantic partner then you are not asexual

A Person Who Is Not A-Spec Being Rude To A-Specs

• sweetie im sorry that you're so insecure that you feel like you have to make up new identities to feel better about yourself. if you are a lesbian or bisexual please know that you are welcome in the community, but other than that making thousands of microlabels like this makes a huge joke out of what was once an important and respected group. nobody takes us seriously anymore because of this shit. does labelling your identity like this really help you with anything? demisexual and fraysexual and all this are just fancy words for normal human feelings that everyone has. there is no need to microlabel it.

Other

· [variations of “no” (12)]

• not sure that helps lmao but still hope it does. all the best

• Axolotls (or as I like to call them, asexulotls) are amazing and I love them [Note: the man in question]

• Sorry, I can't remember the names of any blogs that do edits

• Ok random but the colors of the aro/ace flag? The blue and orange one? They’re gorgeous.

• I'm not so sure if I should use the aroace flag, I feel comfortable using both aro and ace flags, but I don't like the colors for the aroace flag :c [note: these are in chronological order, it’s a total coincidence that these comments are together]

• Curious to see where the survey goes

• It would be cool if you could also do some aplatonic-spectrum edits!

• there were fully half of the terms on that list that i had never even seen before. like, everything below litho down to no label was entirely new to me. at some point i will look into those! (but not right now, my brain is full enough at the moment)

• actually had to look up the majority of these orientations. Thank you for the opportunity to learn!

• Gonna reblog and follow and hopefully learn a bit more, about others and myself

Note: The only comment that is not listed in order is the first comment, which I put at the top because I found it the most important. It’s so important that kids and teens have space to explore their identity and learn about themselves. The reason I made this blog in the first place was because I was 19 and working on figuring out my gender and sexuality. Now that I’m a bit older and understand things better, I’m so glad that I’m able to help people in this way. 

I make it a point to be very openly queer in my life and at work because I need LGBTQ+ people, especially youths, to know that we’re here. I’m lucky that I live somewhere that I can be visibly queer and speak about it openly. We are everywhere, and there’s more of us than you think!

Something that I really like about the comments at the top is that they show how diverse we are, and how people use words differently. Some people feel like they’re more aroace than aromantic and asexual separately, and others consider their romantic and sexual orientations to be completely different things.

I definitely relate to the person who identifies are myrromantic and myrsexual with their friends but just says aroace when speaking with people they don’t know as well. I believe a lot of people use different words depending on who they’re speaking with.

[castpeve]

The Eden Club was a hellhole, but it was better than running away from the police as a deviant. You weren't everyone's first choice, but not unpopular either. The only moment of escape rA9 gave you was when a snobby man rented you a chance to run from the club, along with his android, to find Jericho.

A/N: ok first two chapters probs won't have interactions with the og dbh characters since i dont want the story to be escalating too quickly. first two chaps are just an introduction to the reader and a few minor characters i made up (and maybe sneak a main character in, wink), i hope you guys dont mind !!

count: 2058 words

posted: 190406

PREVIOUS / CHAPTER ONE / NEXT CHAPTER

"Purchase confirmed." The tube slid open, "Eden club wishes you a pleasant experience." The man chuckled, throwing the old, ugly trenchcoat at the android. "Y/n...Eh? All yours, Matt. Ye Bastard." She stood there, perplexed, seeing the man walk out of the club, the Android accompanying him tilted his head, signalling that the Traci should follow.

She didn't know what else to do but do what she thought she was supposed to, after all, no one has ever purchased her for a whole night before. Was this safe? Was this allowed? She didn't know, but the man who bought her looked like a minted man, and the WR600 which followed certainly didn't look like the average model. Yes, it had the iconic blond hair and thin face, yet it had bright, grey-ish blue eyes and countless freckles splattered across it's face. It was also suited in grey trousers and what looked like a white long-sleeved button up shirt under a black hoodie, the Traci, or Y/n, still stood there in front of the closing tube. 'Matt' sighed, walking back to Y/n and grabbed the trenchcoat, helping her to wear it. She was inexperienced with putting on clothes more than revealing black undergarments, only knowing how to take them off.

"Hello, I'm Matthew. Err.. Y/n. Please follow me." He gave a half smile, turning his back at her and she followed. The music slowly faded into the distance as they exit the vibrantly coloured club, the cold climate made Y/n thankful she was given the coat. Even if she was designed to not be bothered by the cold...Or heat, or temperature. After all, she was just a plastic toy to be fucked.

Matthew opened the car door, gesturing her to come in. She did so silently, the awkward atmosphere immediately consuming her. The other android followed, and the car started. "Almost thought you two screwed in the club, heh." The old man laughed, despite looking rich he still drove an old sports car, not the self-driving vehicles that became the ordinary. The car blasted music, seemingly from 2018. They all sat in silence as the car drove, away from the bustling streets of Detroit and into...One of the richer sides of the city. "Get out." The man mumbled, Matthew left the front and opened the door for Y/n, who nervously stood up, out of the sports car. They entered the Apartment complex, Y/n trailing behind Matthew's tall figure the whole walk. They arrived at the elevator, which was quite spacious, the walls decorated with mirrors and mellifluous piano music filled the small space. "So," The man started, stuffing his hands into his beige jacket. "Watcha think of it, Matt? Want me to work late so you two could have some private?" Matthew turned his head to the side, his ears showed a faint blue. "Please, mr. Hutton. I never asked for a Traci.."  He responded in a small voice. "Overworked cunt, ye know you should take a break. Stop workin' and watchin' over Collie like ye life depended on it, Oliver's there for that." Mr. Hutton's thickly voice sounded extremely like the plummy men Y/n had to endure. She stood awkwardly at the side, maintaining her posture. She was admittedly more attractive than all the other Traci's, but made her a bit overpriced. If lonely men hadn't drunkenly spent their money on sex androids, then maybe they had the slimmest chance of being able to afford her. The elevator briefly stopped, Mr. Hutton stepped out as the two androids followed, Y/n still trailing behind Matthew like a lost puppy.

Y/n's theory of Mr. Hutton being a minted man was correct, the bloke lived in a penthouse. And with his mention of a droid named 'Oliver', showed that Matthew wasn't the only bot he owned. Hutton locked the doors, taking off his jacket and immediately heading towards a room. "I'll be in my office, if anything malfunctions about Y/n, Matt, just tell Oliver to tell me. 'Cuz I don't want to smell Android sex." He chuckled, yawning right after. Matthew pressed his lips together, looking annoyed. "I'm sorry, Y/n. You don't need to do the...Thing. Take this as a break from the usual, ehh...Sexy moments you take nightly?" He simpered, taking off the hoodie, briefly revealing the white button up. Y/n could tell the android was a deviant, she herself was one. "I..I know you feel awkward. You don't usually have any robotic clients, yeah? Just, we can hang out in my own...Shared room with two other androids. All of us are deviants, Mr. Hutton doesn't have the heart to report and we don't have the heart to do anything deviant-y. Two others are busy doing whatever." Y/n still followed the Blond sheepishly, taking in the warm coloured interior contrasting from the bright, neon lights of the club she's always been in.

Matthew's room felt significantly colder than the living room, yet the room still had the same warm aesthetic as the rest of the penthouse, accompanied with three twin beds, night stands seperating each of them. They were treated as if they were humans, which wasn't a typical perk humans give to servant androids. Hutton must be incredibly warm-hearted to spend this much for androids. She mumbled a small "Thank you," almost seemingly like a whisper. He plopped down his bed, she assumed, and turned on the TV, situated in the middle of the room on a small, black wooden table filled with various magazines and such. She realized that Matthew isn't going to make the first move any soon, and her main purpose was to satisfy customers. But she was a deviant, she didn't have to give in the club's greedy orders. "You can go and make yourself at home, for the time being. Until you can go back and settle in the tube thing you live in, oh that must be uncomfortable, isn't it? Oh you probably don't wanna be reminded. Oh, uh..." He trailed off, hiding his face behind his hands, the blue hue returning to his face. Boy wasn't used to being with other androids, female androids.

Y/n stiffled a laugh, "It's ok, sir." The corner of her mouth quirking up, "Certainly we can enjoy the night, though?" His eyes widened, "W-wait are you actually willing to do it?? I...Was I programmed for this..." He stuttered, shifting his glance all around the room. She cracked up, laughter echoing in the secluded room. "No, you little cutie, spend it however you want. Whatever you wanna do.." She sat down next to his bed, making Matthew sit up. If he was a human, he'd be a hot flustered mess. Frankly, she didn't imagine doing it with the boy. Something about him turned her off, not in a bad way, but in a way that she'd rather do something else than ride it all night. They have a night to spend, and that night isn't going to be spent throwing nervous exchanges at eachother. "Maybe get to know eachother? What do you like?" Seems like Y/n has the upper hand.

"Wha— Well," His LED turned yellow, which she hadn't paid much attention to. "I like doing new stuff. It's exciting." He grinned apologetically, being a shy wreck. Y/n scanned through her options, thinking about what to ask the man next. She subtly took off the trenchcoat, despite the cold temperature, it was ugly and reeked. She obviously wasn't given anything else, so all she wore was the iconic black EDEN CLUB undergarments. Despite being an android, programmed to work and not to feel, he acted like such a human. If he would remove the LED, she would be convinced Matthew was a normal human boy. And like a normal human boy, the blood rushed to his face, blue contrasting to his pale, synthetic, freckled skin, "Does this make you uncomfortable, sir?" She asked, tilting her head. Matthew shook his head, "I'm quite fine. Call me Matt, or Matthew, uhhh I-D-K."

Y/n's LED flashed yellow, "I-D-K? What does that mean?" She asked, genuinely. "Err, I don't know."

"What? then why did you use it if you didn't know?" She tilted her head in confusion, the concept of internet slang was foreign to her. "Wait, nooo......" He lightly chuckled, "It means that I don't know an answer to something." The tension lightened up a little, Matthew invited her to sit down next to the bed, offering her something to change into. It actually did make him uncomfortable, but, hey, he wanted to be polite.

"Do you have any shirts, please?" She giggled, "I-D-K, your choice, Matt." He looked back at her with wide eyes, soon a smile was plastered onto his face. "I can't believe I'm teaching another Android slang." He laughed, opening the clean, white closet. Well, one of the three. "I have, ehh, this one blue jacket, I think it would fit you. Frankly, I don't remember buying it but, it's convenient.. I guess." He picked up an indigo, red and white striped jacket that would look to small even for Matthew's rather thin build. She was confused as to why he had that in his closet but nodded, gesturing that she would be alright wearing it. Looked like it fit anyway.

He walked back to her and gently put the clothes on the white sheets, the TV still babbling in the background, about an AX400 running away from their home with a human child, the victim said to have been attacked along the way. Matthew spoke up, "They would probably find their way to Jericho, the two, I mean."

Y/n, who had just finished putting on the jacket, "J....Jericho?" she questioned, Matthew raised his artificial eyebrow. "Yes, Jericho. The place where fugitives, deviants run off to to be 'free'. I've wanted to go there but..." His LED turned yellow, "I...I g-guess I'm already content with my artificial life here.." She didn't know why he hesitated.

"Do you know where Jericho is?" She questioned, squinting at the TV, rambling about androids and Cyberlife and shite.

"Well...I've heard that there are clues. Clues that guide you to Jericho. Very few make it, I never made the risk. I didn't want to leave the safety of Mr. Hutton's home either." He tensed up, "You want to go there, don't you?" he started unbuttoning his long sleeve. "Will that be a bad idea?" She asked again, feeling that she's comfortable enough with Matthew to ask about whatever this Jericho thing is. "Likely."

He threw the shirt onto a nearby basket, leaving him with the grey trousers. Y/n's seen naked men, sometimes women, so this hadn't fazed her. unlike Matthew. He turned around, and mumbled a small "Oh." She gave a lopsided grin, before he turned around and grabbed a random shirt and some shorts along with it, "Excuse me!" He added quickly before dashing into the bathroom connected to the bedroom. Which gave her a chance to explore the room for a few moments.

The room was quite luxurious, real Birch wood was used as the floor, mostly being covered by a soft, white mat. one side had Thirium stains which concerned Y/n, but chose to ignore it. One wall was made of mostly glass, showcasing the dim buildings of Detroit; matching white curtains drawn.

The door swung open. "Hews, I'm sad to say that the tomatoes you grew sucked—" Another Android came in, an AP700, Y/n concluded, since she didn't see her come in, she looks like she had just come back from outside. The girls stared silently at eachother, before one of them spoke, breaking the silence; "I am thoroughly disappointed in you, Matthew—fucking—Hutton," She mumbled. Another android came in, sighing. "I told you."

[thoughtfulpaperback]

My 5 Television/Movie Cushes

I will preface this list by saying that most of my crushes are on the fictional characters rather than the actors, except for the first. I am weird because I can think the character is cute and have a crush on them, but the actor or actress that plays them I dont have a crush on... like i have seperated them in my mind somehow, but still appreciate that they are good looking but not interested in them. Now in no particular order:

1. Cesar Evora

My first ever crush was on Cesar Evora. I was so confused. It was 1998 and he was a priest on El Privilegio de Amar (The privilege of loving). At first I was just like "He is good and nice to look at, is it wierd that I like looking at a priest so much!?!", But then in 2002, he was in Entre el Amor y el Odio (between love and hate). It was the first televison show I was ever committed to. I didn't miss a single episode. It was also my introduction to sex at a very tender age. Specifically a sexual cesar evora who I started watching the show to see again... and continued to watch to see MORE of him... a lot more. I had feelings and curiosities I knew nothing of and pretty much continued to watch anything he was in just to see him.

2. Katara (Avatar: The Last Airbender)

Katara was my third tv crush and It was weird because like while novelas and other dramas had been my introduction to sex/attraction/relationships which were all heterosexual and real people, I had no problem being head over heels for Katara. I thought she was beautiful. I could watch reruns of just her water bending for hours if possible. The way she moved and how kind and brave and strong she was, ugh. Like two years into the crush my friend pointed out that I might be too obsessed with her, and should shut that down. So I stopped watching the show. The older me eventually watched the whole series and realized my friend was an ass and really what harm was a tv crush on an animated character doing anyways.

3. Daniel Meade (Ugly Betty)

My very first ship and OTP was Detty. Honestly, Daniel Meade was my first-sorta- problematic crush. I didnt see a problem but others did. He was immature and could be a real jerk in the beginning (sometimes even later on too although not in the same way) but then he would do all these little and big things for betty and/or his mom and I would just swoon. Plus the sad puppy eyes. Heart eyes every damn time. Like I loved him and would defend his character even when he did something stupid. And like I understood what toxic and problematic relationships were and looked like. I did not like the Cole x Phoebe relationship on Charmed although I loved the Cole as a tragic character. But I didn't get those vibes from Daniel and Betty. And I just loved daniel to pieces. I think Eric Mabius just brought a lot to the character too and i just appreciate the work and writing that went into Daniel's character arch.

4. Mr. Darcy/Bridget Jones

Okay so, I love pride and prejudice and every iteration pretty much. But the Bridget Jones's diary had me all sorts of messed up and in love with the two main characters. There is no better Darcy than Colin Firth who can pull off being two different Darcy's in a career and be incredibly charming, awkward, and amazingly handsome as both. I just loved this Darcy and I just wanted to kiss his face even when he was jerkish. Bridget...OMG. talk about problematic crush. She was just such a mess. But I loved her. She had a real normal person body and I was just fascinated with that. She was a drinker, smoker (total real life turn offs for me), and not smart when it came to men, But she was bold, honest, a total klutz, funny, awkward, inappropriate, and just so damn resilient. I was equally awed and enamored with her as Darcy.

4. Harry Greenwood ( Charmed [2018])

My good God. Knowledgeable, dorky, can dodge a flying projectile and sustain massive amounts of damage, and the first male (in a female centric show) who isnt relegated to being passive or sidelined because the writers don't know how to write males interacting with females without making them problematic. I love and would die for Harry. His aesthetic is like killing me and just everything about him makes me want to hug him and never let go.

5. Prue Halliwell (Charmed [1998])

Okay so you know that point in you life where you dont understand crushes and sexuality since you are a young bean and the world has not yet tried to discourage "wrong" or "shameful" feelings. My second tv crush was at that point. Prue just freaking got me: The oldest sibling taking care of her younger siblings, a bit controlling, held a lot in. I mean in some ways I wanted to grow up to be her, because I mean she was just so beautiful, intelligent, POWERFUL, and capable. Good lord, I just loved looking at her back then. I loved watching the show and just thought she was the prettiest, best, and most amazing character on tv. Now I love her for more reasons, but when i first saw the show those where my feelings. Also I don't think any sort of sexuality or attraction is wierd shameful or wrong. Just sharing that old experience or my tv crush.

What about y'all? Who were/are your tv and film crushes? Do y'all remember the first ones?

[lacrimosathedark]

I dont know if you are asexual, but can you help me? I've been trying to find out if I am asexual, but I dunno if I am or not. I mean it's hard to tell if I experience sexual attraction or not if I've never felt it y'know? If you are asexual how did you find out, if you aren't how can you tell what sexual attraction is? I'm terribly sorry if this is too personal or you don't want to answer, and please forgive me if it is or ive come across as rude

You aren’t being rude, it’s totally fine! I can try to help! I’m demisexual, essentially “asexual until I really like someone as a person”, and I was a very late bloomer to experiencing any kind of sexual attraction at all, the majority of my life is asexual experience, so maybe that perspective can help?

Once I saw the word “demisexual” I knew it was me almost immediately. And there were plenty of signs growing up which I notice in retrospect, so much so that when I tried to come out as nonbinary to one of my brothers and he as kindly as possible called it bullshit (still hurts) he also said that he knew/assumed I was asexual and that he accepted that no problem.

Most basic thing is I only experienced any kind of sexual attraction for fictional characters until late high school, and until then I didn’t know what it was. I couldn’t comprehend it. And for me it was never just an aesthetic thing, it was always tied to an emotional connection. I was/am utterly puzzled by the concept of celebrity crushes and I’ve never really had one. You don’t know them, how could you possibly like them? Yeah, they’re pretty I guess, but is that really all that matters??? The words “hot” and “sexy” were also always weird to me and never really feel right in my mouth. In my rare boughts of sexual attraction to this day I usually say that they’re “very attractive”. I very rarely say hot and I almost never say sexy, but that may also be a personal choice because I’m awkward.

I never understood anonymous sex or cheating or even just seeing a random person and saying how much you’d love to have sex with them. I understand better now, but it’s still confusing to me. Why would you want to do something so intimate (and gross, so many body fluids bleh) with someone you aren’t close to and can trust? Why would you go behind the back of someone you supposedly love just for sex? I seriously am perplexed when people will say just upon seeing someone that they’d have sex with them. I still don’t understand what could possibly be so good about it. Never experienced it personally, but also not in any rush to do so. My therapist also seems low-key concerned that I don’t think sex is necessary for my potential future romantic relationship(s) and I am almost entirely unbothered by the idea of dying a virgin. I actually get worried that in the miraculous event I ever get a partner I won’t be good enough if I don’t feel sexually attracted to them or just in general don’t want sex.

One event in particular I remember, during early high school I had a time period where I would watch Guy Code and Girl Code on MTV whenever it was on in an effort to better understand my peers (and I also thought it was funny sometimes). One day I was watching while one of my brothers, same one who knew I was ace, was doing his homework at the table. They were talking about something sexual, I think it might have been masturbation? It was a long time ago. Anyway. I tend to think out loud, especially when watching TV, and I vocalized my confusion as to why someone would feel the need to do that. My brother asked what I meant and I explained because at the time I didn’t know of the health benefits and I had/have never really felt any urge to do so myself. He looked at me with a sort of confused and bewildered expression and informed me that that was weird. And that was when I realized for the second time that the way I think/am isn’t normal. (first time was when I sort-of realized I was nonbinary a few years prior)

To this day, I’ve only been attracted to two real people, and they were schoolmates who I admired greatly first. I’ve spent most of my life confused by the very concept of sexual interaction, especially without romantic context. But there’s also times when I form romantic attraction only and I will think how much I like someone but the very thought of being sexual with them makes me cringe.

I don’t think there’s one singular asexual experience, but if you rarely or never feel attracted to other people in a way that makes you feel like sex is an awesome idea, the asexual spectrum is a safe bet.

That was really long but I hope I helped? Feel free to message me if you wanna talk things out more back-and-forth, I’d love to help you any way I can.

[blookmallow]

hello everyone i realized i wasnt gonna get through today without finding something to keep my brain busy so ive been designing a horror theme park in my head all day here r my ideas so far

- there would be two main theaters, a ghostface theater and a pennywise theater (except. imagine they have creative names, ) 

- ghostface theater is a 3D show theater modeled in the like NOW SHOWING: STAB (FILMED IN STABOVISION) tacky retro horror aesthetic from the second movie 

it would show a park-exclusive Scream 3D short, and also would sometimes be used for upcoming horror sneak previews and other shows, along with indie horror spotlights 

sometimes a ghostface park character would sneak in among the guests and sit next to you (all the main slashers would be around as characters to do autographs and pictures and stuff but i think it would b fun for them to also like. peek out of windows or sneak into shows so you never know where they’re gonna be) 

- ghostface also gets a corresponding gift shop for Scream as well as just all things retro horror, vintage posters, art stuff made from horror vhs tapes like these, stuff like that

- the pennywise theater is a circus tent that houses a stage show, decorated with vintage style PENNYWISE THE DANCING CLOWN posters, old dusty flickery carnival lights, creepy pennywise fortune teller machines, etc 

the stage show features highly elaborate puppetry culminating in a HUGE deadlights pennywise about to consume the audience until the Losers appear at the last second to vanquish him, encouraging the audience to shout him down with them to help defeat him 

- also has a babadook photo spot made to look like the pop up illustrations (and sometimes a babadook character actor visits for pictures) 

- nearby there’d be a midway with carnival games, maybe those balloon squirter clown games with classic pennywise, something for Us maybe a mirror maze or something. a sandwich shop called The Sand Witch

- im neglecting most of the major slashers bc i dont really care about them lmfao maybe freddy kreuger gets a funhouse or something. all i remember about him is the wiggly arms and the blood geyser thing 

- id want to do themed outfits for workers like disney where like everyone in the pennywise area are circus performers and scary clowns, some are vampires some are zombies etc 

- i cant think of what to do with childs play, id absolutely want to have a darkride for something but i cant think what would translate best. it’d be cool to have like an interactive animatronic chucky somewhere, like you can ask him questions and stuff (however that roz animatronic and california adventure works, like how she comments on specific guests on the way by so clearly someone’s controlling it but it still sounds like her) 

- i dont generally care about fnaf at all but i think it’d be great as a real freddy fazbear pizza place with the animatronics performing “normally” (but slightly Wrong. big inspiration from these voice acting clips where they’re just a little glitchy and sometimes its like ‘wait what did he just say’) but at certain times there would be staged “glitches” where the robots suddenly go rogue and like. the lights go out or a curtain falls when its “not supposed to” or something and one of the animatronics DISAPPEARS!! and its like “uhhh NOT TO WORRY, FOLKS, EVERYTHING’S ABSOLUTELY FINE...I...uh...[stage whispering into a walkie talkie] where is he. FIND that bear, NOW-” [freddy’s little song starts and you see his face flickering in a window right behind them]

maybe have actors planted as “guests” who get dragged off 

- then theres the shining’s Overlook Hotel and the Bates Motel and my first thought was to do some kind of walkthrough haunted house attraction in the overlook but maybe those are better suited to just being themed actual hotels connected to the park. definitely want the overlook hedge maze though

- anyway also a graveyard garden ft a garden of poisonous plants and a garden of carnivorous plants complete with an animatronic audrey II and other monster plants but also would have real poisonous/carnivorous plants as well 

- and a little witch apothecary shop in there with like. witchy themed candles, teas, bath stuff, etc. an Oddities Emporium somewhere that has weird morbid collectibles from around the world, bones and preserved jar specimens and stuff. some things would be like real collectors items or intricate reconstructions some would be like, models/soap that looks like an alien head in a jar/etc 

- there would be a Dracula’s Castle attraction designed like a classic haunted house ride ft the universal monsters, and a corresponding vampire themed fine dining restaurant with live music at night (or. un-live) 

- maybe some kind of mad science lab themed bar with drinks in test tubes and beakers and stuff

- jigsaw escape room challenge themed for Saw but obviously not ever putting guests in any real danger, im trying to think of how you could recreate the. like. it’s like an escape room puzzle, but when you figure out the answer there’s that moment of “oh fuck. oh god fucking fuck no” when you realize what you have to do, how could you recreate that in a fictional/for-fun setting where the guests know they aren’t really in danger and you’re not actually putting anyone at risk. like maybe gross but safe challenges. i dont know. maybe some kind of system where if you “die” you’re out of the game and there’s some prize if you “survive” to the end so someone might have to “sacrifice” themself but no one’s actually getting hurt 

it’s like how do you balance “you wanna scare people” with “you want them to understand they are in fact actually safe” 

- a special effects workshop that showcases some behind the scenes makeup and practical effects, makeup artists doing horror face paint/etc for guests

- a ghostbusters themed blaster ride (the ones where you shoot targets n get points) (we have ‘ghost blasters’ at the boardwalk here lmao im not gonna pretend that wasnt where i got this idea. look up ‘sally corp ghost blasters’ if you’re interested in that) 

- i really want to say ‘and a Mrs. Lovett’s Meat Pies restaurant’ but would that be Too gross. like obviously it wouldn’t be a Real Cannibalism Restaurant lmao but would the theming put people off too much 

anyway thats what i got hire me to design your theme park i have no experience and no capability of actually realizing any of this but boy do i have ideas 

[rustpuppy]

the ace asks but only the fun ones

only the fun ones lol 

1.       When did you know that you were asexual?

mm i think i was 17 

2.       How do you define asexuality for yourself?

i dont experience sexual attraction 

3.       What is your romantic orientation?

aromantic. im that sweet aroace.

4.       What is your full orientation?

uhh aroace ^ im also agender

5.       Do you like sex?

dunno,, never had it

6.       Do you like romance?

noo

7.       Would you be in a romantic relationship?

nu-uh

8.       Would you be in a sexual relationship?

i dont.. think so

9.       Would you be in a platonic relationship?

maybe. i guess it would depend on the person.

10.   Describe your attraction to men?

aesthetic attraction. i like to look but i feel no need to touch or interact. 

11.   Describe your attraction to women?

same as for men, just aesthetic. 

12.   Hugs or kisses?

hugs

13.   Preferred kisses to receive?

cheek kisses 

14.   Preferred kisses to give?

cheek or head kisses

15.   Favorite thing about being asexual?

since realizing that i was ace ive really stopped caring about being found “attractive” by other people

16.   Least favorite thing about being asexual?

dont understand a lot of media and the whole obsessed w sex thing that society’s got going on

17.   Worst thing someone has said to you about your identity?

that ace people “must have been hurt before” or whatever like….. stop

19.   Animal or human companion? If so, what kind or who?

animal. dog please. tiny dog. my dog.

20.   Character you see as asexual?

my child naruto… let me hav my ace demon child

23.   Dogs?

10/10. A+++. excellent.

24.   Cats?

very good. very talented. very soft.

30.   Do you consider yourself LGBTQA?

yeah man. look at that “A”. im queer. 

33. Asexual headcanon?

tony stark ! my autistic ace headcanon.

35. Are you out to anyone, be it online or in real life?

im out online and w you

36. Would you ever come out to anyone, be it online or in real life?

if it came up i think so

38. Do you enjoy being asexual or on the aspec?

yeah, i like the community

41. Do you want the discourse to die?

yes please. fuck off acephobes.

45. Do you have connections to figures in history or mythology in relation to your asexual or aspec identity?

artemis is aroace alright

46. Have you ever doubted your asexuality?

yeah i thought aesthetic attraction = sexual attraction for many years

47. Describe your dream relationship?

sugar daddy/mommy/whatever that pays for me to adopt unwanted dogs from shelters 

[funeralllhome]

im posting about body image yall skip if u dont care lmao

i was always one of those girls who was always like “makeup doesn’t matter, u dont need it, im not liKE other girls i dont wear make up” but then i realized something real important that other people already realized before me.

you dont have to wear makeup for any one but you.

about a year ago, i was feeling really bad about myself. 

if yall dont know, i am a lil overweight and it does bother me, because i have been told that being overweight doesn't “fit the aesthetic you are trying to achieve haha” but i wasnt even feeling bad about that but like, i was feeling bad about everything. i compulsively pluck and pull at my eyebrows. (ive been doing it for years and years and its not good. when i was in school it was almost like, a funny joke that i didn’t have any eyebrows or that they were really thin.) i have a small touch of redness to the skin on my face, and i also suffer from chin acne and dry lips. i always thought that of i tried to “cover” those things, that i would look like i was trying to hard or i would look ridiculous, or that someone would tell me that i looked really bad. it caused me a lot of anxiety so i just decided to just deal with it and feel bad about myself and basically let my confidence plummet. 

i started, for the first time, to wear makeup for ME, and me alone, and let me tell you, it has honestly made me feel so much better about myself, like the best i ever have. i like playing and experimenting with it, i like looking at it and buying it, i love and it makes me a lil sad that it took me so long to really enjoy it bc i was living in my own internal misogynist thought that makeup was dumb and would make me “feminine and frail.”

i also dont know if ive ever shared anything about my sexuality on here either but i do identify as a bisexual. i always felt confused about the way that i wanted to look bc i wasn’t sure if i was coming off as “bi enough” when i wanted to attract women. but ive learned over the last year that it doesnt matter if you have a full face on or just a lil lipstick, if someone is really interested in you they wont care and that has always been something i struggled with. i was teased a lot in my earlier youth for “looking like a boy” and being a “lesbian” and it made me feel almost ashamed to ever come out or even let anyone know until i was almost 18. i feel like when i did start to come closer to being more confident and being me secure in myself, i found myself being much more open about my sexuality. 

i feel like im rambling now which is why im putting this under a read more cause its p dumb but i just wanted to share, so if you do read this thanks for reading!!!