#and if anyone agrees or disagrees with anything i say here please feel free to add to the conversation!

[babygirltangerine]

I don't know, what exactly I hate about ladybug. I think it's the way he acts, and how everything always seems too go tight for him because he's the "funny American guy".

you're so right for that. like for real. but i also feel like things tend to go wrong for him, but they end up okay because he's the protagonist. and we're supposed to see him around these awesome badass characters and laugh because the contrast is so intense and he's clearly a bad choice of protag, and that's meant to be his charm (obviously a very bold choice). i do find it endearing a lot of the time, but it's definitely very important to question why he was made to be american and how his americanness affects the story, the way he interacts with the other characters and the environment. in a way i think his americanness is meant to add to his characterization as a very clueless person and as a protagonist that's out of his element in more ways than one. but at the same time it was a very tone deaf decision when the story and the characters are originally japanese. i don't think it was intentional, but regardless, making ladybug into a white american man who absentmindedly wreaks havoc on these other characters of color (and eventually multiple trains and an entire fucking town!!) and is one of the few survivors does seem to be uplifting american voices and perspectives and presences and you do have to look into the implications of that. so you're right to be annoyed with him!! this post hits on a lot of things that i'm talking about and that you seem to have picked up on, and i want to reiterate that you're incredibly valid for feeling that way, and you don't have to change your mind about it!

back to your initial fic-related question, i'm not sure if there are any fics that can change the way you feel, but a lot of people tend to write ladybug as a more fleshed out character who doesn't seem to begin and end with this clueless american ignorance. ladybug is interesting because i feel like he has a great basis to expand on in fanon, and in fics he can be silly and misguided and make the wrong moves with his heart in the right place, but i also see a lot of fics where he genuinely has grown a lot since the events of the movie and he's more emotionally intelligent after taking his therapy more seriously. those are the kinds of fics i like to see because i do feel that he doesn't really grow enough in the movie.

so he is more fleshed out in fanon, he's less caricature-ish and his americanness is less in your face. but that being said, its also important to acknowledge that as fanon (and tangybug fic in particular) tries to avoid characterizing ladybug as orientalist, it tends to do so by cutting out japanese characters and japanese culture entirely. movie ladybug can be read as this extremely american, sillygoofy white man who, even without meaning to, creates conflict along racial lines. and one of the reasons we don't tend to read him that way in tangybug fics is because his whiteness and his westernness become less of a source of contrast between him and the other characters, because tangybug fics are romance stories between a white american man and a white british man. i dont want to sound like im bashing the creators in this small fandom because i completely understand not wanting to write an orientalist character, and also because im so extremely grateful for everything these creators have poured their heart and energy into providing for us. we have amazing fan-created content here. and i'm one of the champions of the tangybug ship, but the content i've made for this fandom is not above critique either! these are just points that naturally arise in a fandom for a movie like bullet train.

tl/dr: you're right and you don't have to stop feeling that way! but you can enjoy ladybug/bullet train while criticizing it at the same time. in tangybug fics, these problems with ladybug's white americanness are often less pronounced, but the fandom is not above critique either. still, i hope you're able to find a balance somewhere between being aware of the flaws with ladybug/fanon/the movie in general and your enjoyment of these things!

[moonstruckme]

not sure this really applies for the blueberry muffin prompt but...update on roomate!james and reader? 🥺 (AND CONGRATS ON 7k 🥳🥳)

It does haha! I knew blueberry muffin would be my downfall (but it's okay I signed up for it and ily regardless). Please accept this garbage fire of a drabble <3

cw: modern au, alcohol mention

roommate!James x shy!reader ♡ 683 words

You’re squished between Sirius and James, the two people here least likely to allow you space to breathe. James has got you half in his lap, his arm around your waist and one of your thighs over his, while Sirius’ shoulder pushes into yours, his legs cast over the arm of his couch so he can kick gently at Remus when the urge strikes him. 

“Her coworker hates me,” James says. 

“He does not.” You roll your eyes. This is a topic you’ve been over before. “Art likes you just fine.”

“Does too!” He pinches your waist. “It’s because he’s in love with you.” 

You fight the urge to hide your face in his side. “He is not.” 

James laughs. “He is, sweetheart. You just can’t see it.” 

“You would hardly know, would you?” Sirius agrees, but he agrees with James on everything. You’re fairly sure that if James said the moon was green, Sirius would swear the same until his dying breath. “You didn’t know our Jamesie liked you until he practically confessed.” 

“I still doubt it sometimes,” you mutter, earning you another teasing pinch from your boyfriend. 

“Hold on,” says Lily, “she’s the one who works with him.”

Remus nods. While Sirius always agrees with James, Remus always disagrees with the both of them. You suspect this is mostly because he enjoys getting them riled up. “Exactly. I think y/n has had plenty more time to figure out if he has feelings than you have, James.” 

“He used to walk her home after every shift,” James argues. 

“Because he’s nice,” you sigh. 

“Nice to you, you mean.”

“It’s very normal to walk girls home from late shifts.” 

Remus hums. “Have you considered, James, that maybe because you’ve never worked in the service industry, there are norms you don’t understand?” His tone is smug. Sirius kicks his foot at him lazily.

James’ eyebrows rise above the frames of his glasses. “Have you considered,” he waves his free hand in your direction, “look at her?” 

Your face heats something atrocious. Sirius tsks. “He’s got you there, darling.” 

“Hush,” you say to James, though you can’t manage to infuse your voice with any sternness. “You’re the only one that thinks that.” 

“Nope,” he replies, popping the p. “Actually, it’s me and Art and every other seeing person on the planet. Sorry, sweetheart.” 

You’re not sure if he’s apologizing sardonically or genuinely, for the pain his compliments are causing you. A big hand cups the side of your head, bringing you closer so he can kiss your hair. 

It doesn’t pacify you. “You’re awful,” you say, slipping out from between him and Sirius so his friend nearly falls sideways onto James’ lap. “I’m going to get some water, does anyone want anything?” 

Lily and Remus say no, Sirius asks for a cider, and James is noticeably silent. You can’t say you’re surprised when he comes into the kitchen behind you. 

He gives you a sheepish look. You don’t believe it even a little. “Have I scared you off?” 

You go to Sirius and Remus’ fridge, grabbing the cider for Sirius. “No.” 

“But I embarrassed you.” James wraps his arms around your middle, smushing his lips to your hairline. “M’sorry, lovely.” 

“Don’t,” you say, though you’re far from pulling out of his embrace. “It takes more than that to scare me off.” 

“Yeah?” You can hear the teasing slip into his voice, and that scares you more than it should. “Good. Because you’re gonna have to get used to it, you know. I don’t plan on toning down how lovely you are just because you might get shy on me.” 

You tilt your head back to see him. “You’re insufferable.” 

“So you’re always telling me.” James’ grin is huge. He drops a kiss on the bridge of your nose. “You’re lovely, and I’m insufferable. How’s that fair?” 

“Dunno.” You kiss his chin in return. Fill your cup with water and brush past him out the kitchen. “Suppose you’ll have to get use to it.” 

It’s impossible not to smile when his laughter sounds behind you. 

[vidavalor]

Hello! Thank you for visiting. Armchairs and blankets and snacks are over there. *points* Stuff about my blog is here. Please read. Thank you. 💕

Hi there! Below please find some stuff about the content of my blog under the cut.

Feel free to say hi anytime, tag me in a post or to throw something into my Ask inbox thingamajig. I live for messages. As always, message me if you have any questions or comments.

You can find my masterlist pinned to my blog.

Content Info:

-I don't have an age rating on my blog as we all mature at different rates but I'd say some of the stuff is more adult than others. There is cursing and frequent discussions of sex. High school age or above should be fine here.

-Infrequently, a post may discuss characters who have a history of domestic and/or sexual abuse. All of these posts will contain individual trigger warnings so you will know before you read them and can make the choice as to whether or not that is something you would like to read.

-I don't TW posts for religious trauma in general because I write a lot about it (this is predominantly a Good Omens blog, after all...) but if the abuse veers into anything related to physical or sexual violence, anti-Semitism, racism, any type of queer-phobia or anything of any of those types of horrible natures, I will add a TW for it at the top of the post.

-This is queer-friendly space, as is a lot of Tumblr, thankfully. If you are a jerk to me or to anyone engaging with me here, you will be blocked and, depending on the situation, likely reported. In the words of David Lynch as Gordon Cole in Twin Peaks:

-I write a lot about Good Omens and some of what I write about is centered around analysis pertaining to Crowley & Aziraphale's relationship, which I see as being both romantic and sexual in nature and going back a long time. I believe that engaging with art means being open-minded and curious about how others see things. It does not mean demanding that my way is "the right" way and I don't expect everyone to agree with me.

I say this because Good Omens has a sizable fanbase that identifies as asexual and/or aromantic and for some people of that community, the idea of Crowley & Aziraphale as a sexual and/or romantic pairing is not appealing. My point is that if that is you, how you see this show is valid, too. We may disagree on some details on this one particular show but we do not disagree about how much there needs to be more overall representation of asexual and aromantic life in the arts. I have your back on that and if you would like to engage with me but are hesitant to do so because you see that I write a lot about a different kind of interpretation of Crowley & Aziraphale, please do not hesitate! I love seeing everyone's different ideas and creative works.

Thank you for reading & I hope you're having a great day. 💕

[ihatepeoplesomuchuwu]

@abyssleaves GIRL I FUCKING LOVE YOU HOLY SHIT. You dropped this queen 👑

This person right here, you have said it so perfectly and have inspired me to say something. I will also probably get hate but you know what? That's fine at this point 😎

This carnivorekitty situation? I'M SO OVER IT!!! I don't even 100% agree with tom but, most of you guys are getting upset at OPINIONS AND DARK HUMOR LIKE HOLY SHIT. I want you all to think about this. What part of it is beliefs? The belief of not understanding neopronouns? No no no he didn't say "hate." he said he didn't agree with them and wasn't going to hate people for using them. But nah, instead of maybe sitting down with a cup of tea, you all jumped the gun and said, "THE NERVE?! HE DOESN'T AGREE WITH ME?!". Pssst hey lean in close...... I don't understand them either 😐 If you approached me, though, and told me your pronouns, I would never hate you for using them. It is YOUR life and I will respect/use your pronouns(I use any pronouns btw UwU) and I can't tell you what to do, and as long as you're not hurting anyone, who cares right? But don't demand me to understand or get why because I don't want to, and I'm just too stupid to care.

ANYWAY TO THE TRANSPHOBIC TOPIC!! Okay, this confused me for so long on why people called him transphobic because even I understood that people of the lgbtq+ have different opinions on things and deal with stuff differently. Him saying that kids/teens having medication and surgeries are life changing and then most definitely are. Most medications are safe, but did you know that their was a birth control that was FDA approved and it worked for a long time! Until women started having babies missing limbs and parts of them. Medical stuff can happen at anytime, it being safe of not it can still happen. And the surgeries? I agree that people shouldn't have surgeries until they are 18. Why? Because you have jackasses that aren't trans/have medical needs who take advantage of that for their own benefits and you have people who find out that they are not trans/non-binary/so on later in life and detransition.

Also, can no one like dark humor anymore??? A trans person likes a dark humored trans meme it's end shattering, but people still adore famous people making 9/11 jokes? Yeah, okay, love you guys ❤️ and don't get me started on the nazi shit because WOW WE GOING FOR IT WITH THAT ONE!!! Did anyone read the post Tom made at all? Hm? He said, and I quote, "I don't see anything on how he's a nazi however, that seems like a stretch. However, if anyone can provide actual proof of these claims, you can let me know." He ASKED for proof and said he doesn't agree with all of his posts, yet all of you jumped on him instantly calling him a "nazi sympathizer"? I literally saw one, FUCKING ONE PERSON show him the proof of it instead of jumping him like zombies 🧟‍♂️ 🧟‍♀️

My last take is the pride parade stuff which is just silly to get mad about?? As a person who has basically raised my siblings as my own children and wanting kids of my own some day, I can understand about the not wanting children to see half naked people and honestly who would? What I get is that it is a pride parade and they are mostly known for people doing that, they usually make a flyer or post saying if it's going to happen orr not so please look first. What pisses me off is when people defend that and call them something-phobic for not agreeing 😑 "Agree to disagree" is perfectly put for this, People can have opinions on this without being hateful. You guys come OOON

That is all I have to say for this, I would touch on the racism aspect but I must say out of that whole thing I could understand why people were mad/hurt and I am a pale ass white-irish person who has never experienced racism(only the "HA HA YOU'RE AN ALCOHOLIC" jokes due to me being irish 🤣)so I have no right to say anything in that.

Anyway, I'm gonna just rant here, so feel free to hate on me in my inbox because I could honestly just chill with anyone even if they scream at me UwU

[stardust-sunset]

warning, anti-kyman rant under the cut. i’m not saying that anyone who ships kyman deserves to die or anything, this is just my opinion on the ship. don’t…get crazy here. i’m not saying anything about the shippers themselves, i’m talking about the ship.

i genuinely don’t understand kyman.

this is so over said but shipping a neonazi with the only jewish kid in the show (minus kyle shwartz) doesn’t make any sense.

and i know some people have ‘proof’ like ‘oh cartman bullies kyle because he likes him!’ like cartman also bullies kenny, butters, and basically everyone on the show. because he is insane. and yes, i understand that kyle is the one who is bullied the most by cartman. but like…wendy was too?? the whole breast cancer episode was basically cartman harassing wendy, like i can see her and cartman having a one sided crush (cartman crushing on wendy) more so than cartman crushing on kyle. and didn’t he bully that one little person on the show? mr nilsson? does that mean that him and mr nilsson are gonna get freaky? (have a feeling i just predicted the next big ship/hj)

and like…i get most of cartman’s foils make kyle look gay, but that’s because cartman likes to humiliate kyle. humiliating kyle makes cartman feel good, hence why he does it, i guess? and i too was made fun of because someone liked me, and even if cartman did have a crush on kyle, i doubt kyle would even forgive him/give him a chance. and besides. i’m pretty sure cartman is the straightest, whitest, most homophobic person in the entire show. i don’t believe he would ever fall for kyle.

and kyle himself has said ‘i hate cartman with all of my heart’ like…doesn’t that kinda click?? if someone did half the shit cartman did to kyle to me because they liked me i would go apeshit. just an opinion. istg y’all would ship anything and anyone. it’s like the new my hero academia. like, again, ship what you want, but why? it’s so annoying to see people get into screaming fights about ships like the show wasn’t even made for that. never in the show have any of the characters expressed a romantic or possibly romantic interest in each other, and yes, the lore can be fun. but when people are getting into screaming wars about this shit it’s so annoying to see. like chill and agree to disagree. it is not that deep. let people ship what they want, you don’t need to scream at everyone for not shipping what you want. just personally? kyman? fuck. no. please dni if you ship this.

as for the ship itself? i’m not a fan. i’m not saying everyone who ships it deserves to die or go to hell, i’m saying that the ship itself doesn’t make sense. a neonazi with a jewish kid doesn’t really click? and don’t even get me STARTED on whatever the fuck a ‘holocaust au’ is. what the fuck does that even mean. that’s just wrong and insensitive. that’s just my opinion though, feel free to do what you like, but lmk if i’m being an asshole

[tarredion]

Survey!!

Hey! I’ve got a math project to complete and would love some answers to my survey (on google forms, though no email required). The only requirement is that you have ever *seen* a graph before. You don’t have to be a math genius or anything.

Very simple procedure: 8 questions, each of them showing a very basic graph. Read the statement made about the information in the graph, pick whether you agree or disagree (or otherwise, are unsure) with the statement.

here is a link: 

survey link

feel free to send or share the link  with anyone else (family members, friends, mutuals, or just reblog to your feed). I wont say no to more answers :)

Please and thank you

[redmirrorshard]

I'll probably delete this later... but I just wanted to come on here to vent a little bit. So please be aware. THIS IS A VENT. I AM SAD AND EMOTIONAL AND UPSET AND I WILL SAY THINGS THAT MAY SOUND HARSH. PLEASE KEEP THIS IN MIND WHEN READING AND DONT READ IF IT WILL MAKE YOU UNCOMFORTABLE!! (TL:DR at the end)

You have been warned

When I got into TWST probably two years ago now, there was so much room and potential for wonderful fan interactions and creations. And I have had wonderful interactions with wonderful people from this fandom and I will continue to treasure those I've met through it.

I love everything about TWST. The lore, the characters, the art, the story. It means so much to me as a piece of media and is a huge inspiration to me as both an artist and a writer. Idia in particular speaks to me on personal levels and he has become one of my favourite characters in all of media.

TWST has also taught me about love. Love for who you are despite what others think. Familial love (blood or no). Love between friends. TWST has taught me about bravery, protecting those you love, sticking to your ambitions, sacrifice and surprisingly cooking and food heh. TWST has also made me laugh like a maniac in the way only one other piece of media ever could (aha I'm so funny).

I was aware, however, that it would have it's issues just like any other fandom.

For one, I was VERY aware of Yana's rocky history as a creator. I knew she was controversial from the start and anything she created would subsequently also be very controversial. In the end, while I do disagree heavily with some parts of the media and I knew Yana could have done so much better with other parts (cough-leona event- cough), I think she did a great job overall. You can tell how much love and dedication went into creating TWST and I'm eternally thankful to her. Thank you, Yana-sensei.

For second...

I feel that you should be allowed to create and say whatever you want, but also take responsibility (to a certain extent) for the thing you created. For instance, if I make a piece of art and post it on the internet, that is my responsibility. I could choose NOT to post the piece of art (nasty comment, offensive joke etc etc etc but you get the idea), but I chose to do it anyway. Now, I can't completely control what people will do with the art (comment/post etc), but I still chose to post it. Same with this post. I CHOSE to post this, and I am ready to take responsibility for this post. If you're not ready to accept responsibility for your post, DON'T POST. As simple as that. (But alas nothing is ever simple)

There is a sore lack of responsibility it the TWST fandom (in any fandom, really, but this is about TWST specifically). Maybe less so here, but definitely so on other platforms.

People throw around nasty and downright hurtful jokes and comments like it's confetti, but cry and whine that they're innocent when called out about it. This is especially hurtful to the smaller, less represented groups in the fandom who create content they want to see. My advice? If you see something you don't agree with,mute,block and report if necessary and just move along. No one is forcing you to interact with what that person is making. A lot of hurt and asshole-ery would be avoided if people followed this simple rule.

I've also seen people throw hate to younger artists or members of the fandom and this always upsets me. TWST is especially prone to having a younger audience due to it being a Disney property, and that's FINE. Leave them be. They're not hurting anyone.

And finally, the amount of misinformation and misinterpretations of the TWST characters floating around is practically insulting. I've seen so many just plain wrong interpretations of a character or a line and I'm frankly sick of it. There are so many hard working and dedicated translators working their asses off to translate the game and put it on the internet for free. (Note: I am eternally grateful to the EN translation team for doing their absolute best on TWST EN. While it's still a solid translation, it has several big flaws and misses a lot of character nuances. I'd still recommend anyone getting into TWST to read the JP translations along with EN)

Here are my go to, feel free to add your own:

-TWST Wiki/Miraheze (always. These people are powerhouses)

- YuuRei (Twitter and YT). They make excellent analysis and translations.

-Shell_BB (YT)

-Otome Ayui (YT)

So, in closing... (TL:DR)

The internet sucks. People suck. Get used to it. Protect yourself and your mental health and move along.

TWST has flaws, and that's FINE.

Respect eachother

Take responsibility for what you say or post

Kids will be cringe. Leave them be. You were cringe too.

Read. Please. I beg of you.

SUPPORT THE PEOPLE I MENTIONED. THEY'RE WORKING THEIR ASSES OFF FOR US, THEY DESERVE THE WORLD.

Anyway, thanks for reading all that and sorry for the long vent. A cookie and a hug for you.

Now go forth and have a great day/night on purpose!!⭐🩷

~shard

[windandheartbeat]

Hello there!!

You've reached AXYER's SFW "weird stuff" blog. I hope you enjoy your stay!

Here's my SFW vore and SFW tickling account! Obviously, you can block this account should you desire to and wholly dismiss that you ever saw this account, that's totally fine! I wouldn't even judge you!

HOWEVER, I do humbly request you don't post me anywhere or laugh at me with your friends on a voice-call! I know it probably seems really fun, but it really, really hurts! I promise you there's better things to laugh at, I'm not trying to hurt anyone and I'm just doing this for comfort! We can be friends, even if we don't agree on everything, alright?

Now, DNIs are famous for literally not working whatsoever in most cases, but I'm going to try anyway, just so if you're blocked you know why:

-Racist, homophobic, transphobic (including believing there's only two genders/TERFs), radfems, radqueers, "MAP"/"NOMAP", ableist, sanist, sexist, conservative/alt-right/Republican

-Religious extremist (NOT just Christians or Muslims)

-Zionists 🇵🇸

-If you love arguing with people/brag about how you "take no shit" and love hurting people/committing crimes

-Obviously, if you think being "cringy" and being "bad" are the same thing!

-If you think talking shit about people is a likeable personality trait (sorry I hate these people so much)

-Com-shippers, ESPECIALLY if you ship characters with abusive dynamics (I had to resist saying so many mean things but I will refrain, I will refrain…)

-If you're a fan/kin/identify as/with WHATSOEVER anyone/anything from a certain webcomic where a white stick figure with a tie is tormented by a black stick figure with bat wings + red tendrils (I am extremely uncomfortable with anyone who applies to this. DNI. I mean it, please.)

-If you're unable to agree to disagree/accept differing opinions

Otherwise, here's a bit about myself!

Hi!! I'm an aspiring child psychologist from Long Island! I love to write, draw, maladaptive daydream horrifically (/hj) and walk!! A LOT!! I LOVE WALKING!!

I'm also a Heart (C/C/C/C) fictionkin!! Technically also a G/r/i/m/m/c/h/i/l/d and stick figure fictionkin, but those are less important!!

I promise you that I do not bite and unless your ask scares me I will respond as kindly as I possibly can!! And if it does scare me, dw! I probably just won't respond, but feel free to clarify! I LOVE clarification!!

I am ABSOLUTELY willing to make friends!! Let's be little /pos freaks together!! <3333

My taste in vore/tickling depends on the current hyperfixation, but Soul is a pred/ler whilst Heart (me yk yk me) is a prey/lee!! Sometimes I throw in Mid as a switch for both 👀

My preferences in vore are:

-No fluids! Everything is cushiony but dry, saliva actually REALLY icks me out!!

-Food and prey go in different areas!!

-I most like same-size + half-size but I'm A-ok with G/T!! HOWEVER I always prefer the bigger one to be the pred!!

-NO DIGESTION NO DIGESTION WHATSOEVER IT MAKES ME EXTREMELY UNCOMFORTABLE EVEN IF THERE'S REFORMING

-I like only a small belly, enough that the people around them go "hey, have you gained weight recently?" but no more than that!! Less than that's good too!!

-Fearplay is my FAVORITE!! No foodplay tho!!

-I prefer humanoids (not humans) but anthros and taurs work too!!

-I'm uncomfy with children being involved as well as animals but siblings is cool with me simply because I like to imagine it similar to how bickering siblings will do crazy things to piss one another off!!

-Vore used as timeout is EXCELLENT and probably my fav trope!!

Tickling preferences!!

-No tongue!! Again I don't like saliva!!

-I LOVE RASPBERRIES YESSSSSS LKDNDNSJSOJSNSN

-I really like it when they're held down!!

-Mocking YES I LOVE MOCKING

-Cuddling afterwards when they're all sleepy mhm mhm yessssssss

-When the belly and sides are the most ticklish 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

-Ticking with MORE than two arms YESSSSSS MHM MHM MHM MHM MHM

-Tickling as revenge :)))))))))

Tags!!

#vore moment - Vore stuff!!

#tickle moment - Tickle stuff!!

#*receives food* - Reblog!!

#hearb spelling bee (vore) - Vore fic!!

#hearb spelling bee (tickle) - Tickle fic!!

#fellow freaks slash pos - Friend reblogs + discussion!!

#sad times - Angsty stuff!!

#owa goodness!! - Happy/fluffy stuff!!

#the blues and greens - Fav posts!!

#realising through glazed eyes - ALL TIME fav posts!!

What I censor:

#cw profanity - Post has curse words!!

#cw all caps - Post has all capital letters stuff in it!! (Might forget I apologize!!)

#tw digestion - Post has digestion!! (Would only be used in fictional content)

#tw suicide - Post has suicide!! (Would only be used in fictional content)

#tw suicide attempt - Post has a failed suicide attempt!! (Would only be used in fictional content)

#tw suicidal ideation - Post has thoughts/plans/consideration/reflections of suicide!! (Would only be used in fictional content)

#tw panic attack - Post contains a panic attack! (Would only be used in fictional content) (well, hopefully!)

#tw s/h - Post contains self-harm!! (Would only be used in fictional content) (will also be tagged as #tw self harm + #tw self-harm!!)

#tw homicidal ideation - Post has thoughts/plans/consideration/reflections of homicide/murder! (Would only be used in fictional content)

I think that's all… anyways, have fun here!!

[luminouslumity]

So I'm finally writing fanfiction again! I've actually been trying to work on this one for months now and I think I'm finally satisfied with the result!

From the moment they met, Sun Wukong had always taken Tang Sanzang to be nothing but a fool, but he hadn't expected for the same to apply to the others as well. In hindsight, perhaps he should've—unlike himself, they'd all always been far too in awe of the so-called Great Monk to ever disagree with him on anything, Zhu Bajie especially.

"I still say you're making a mistake!" said the Monkey King after they'd left the Lady Bone Demon alone in her prison, her punishment for nearly destroying the entire world! He knew killing was against the teachings of Buddha, but couldn't they have made an exception just this once? She already had a tomb and everything, after all! Might as well finish what they'd started, right?

In response, the Tang Monk sighed and muttered something—likely an insult—before turning to his túdì. "Don't you trust my judgement, Sun-xíngzhě?"

"Absolutely not!"

This earned him a glare from the human while he heard Zhu Bajie snort. "Maybe it's about time you had more faith in our shīfu," the pig demon said as he too glared at the Monkey King.

Sun Wukong scowled; he wasn't surprised by Zhu Bajie's reaction, but it certainly made him feel no less annoyed. How is it that I'm being the voice of reason here? "Well, Dāizi, maybe you should—"

"Enough, Sun Wukong!" Tang Sanzang had stepped in between the two demons, but then he shielded Zhu Bajie after facing Monkey completely. "My decision is final! Besides," he added, glancing at Sha Wujing and Ao Lie, who both stood a little aways from the rest of the group while they spoke to the Empress Dowager Liu Ming, "your shīdì have already agreed that imprisoning her was for the best. So why can't you do the same?"

Sun Wukong gritted his teeth. He hated it whenever the monk got like this, always asking why he couldn't be more quiet like Ao Lie or more patient like Sha Wujing. He'd never say such things to Bajie! It was clear who the favorite was, however little sense it made.

"I'm sorry, Shīfu." The words tasted bitter on the Monkey King's tongue. "Please forgive this foolish disciple for merely concerning himself with the fate of the Mortal Realm." He gave a mocking bow and was about to walk away, until he saw the Empress Dowager heading towards them.

"Bìxià." Tang Sanzang bowed to the regent and both Sun Wukong and Zhu Bajie followed his lead.

"Lǎoyé." She returned the gesture before continuing, and despite the mourning period, she smiled. "I was just telling your túdì how I wished to hold a banquet in your honor."

"A banquet?" This got Sun Wukong's attention immediately. At last, some recognition! Well, more recognition, anyway. And how could anyone say no to free food? Yet he looked at the monk with large, pleading eyes anyway; it was an irritating inconvenience that he practically had to get a human's permission to do anything at all these days, but between this and being trapped under a mountain, he knew which one he preferred.

He was pleased to see Zhu Bajie and Sha Wujing doing the same, though Lie—even in his human-like form—maintained his usual stoic expression. So that probably meant he was interested too, right? It was always hard to tell with him.

Tang Sanzang, however, looked reluctant. "Would such a thing be appropriate? What with you being in mourning and all. I'd hate for us to take any attention away from the recently deceased."

Somehow, Sun Wukong was able to suppress a growl. So this was how someone could say no to free food. But then Liu Ming laughed and this made him relax.

"I wouldn't be offering if I wasn't sure, Tang-lǎoyé," she said. "I appreciate what you're trying to do, but I assure you it's fine, at least for today. You're leaving tomorrow, aren't you? And it'd be a small feast anyway."

"Hm. Well..." The Tang Monk paused and glanced at his túdì. At Sun Wukong specifically.

Does he think I'm going to do something? How unfair! He'd been on his best behavior for weeks now!

But then the monk smiled. Turning to the Empress Dowager again, he said, "That would be lovely. Er, so long as the food is vegetarian, though!"

"But of course!" came her reply, sounding pleased and looking amused. "You and your túdì are not the first Buddhists to pass through Bāoxiāng, Tang-lǎoyé. In the meantime, please feel free to explore the palace grounds. The banquet will be held tonight."

"Xièxie," said Tang Sanzang as they all exchanged respectful bows before the Empress Dowager left.

Explore, huh? Sun Wukong felt giddy at just the thought of it. It was only his favorite thing to do, after all! And with a kingdom as beautiful as Bāoxiāng—with its jade thresholds and golden steps—surely he'd be able to find some magnificent treasures he could... secretly borrow. Permanently, of course.

But then he heard Ao Lie call for him. "Dà-shīxiōng!"

Oh, don't tell me! If the dragon prince had initiated a conversation, then that usually meant one thing.

Sure enough, the Monkey King turned his head in time to see his shīfu unrolling a scroll as the monk made his way towards a tree, with Zhu Bajie and Sha Wujing following close behind like ducklings.

"Come along, now," Ao Lie prompted, resting a hand on the stone monkey's shoulder. "If you don't, then you will only get lectured later."

Sun Wukong groaned at this, though he knew his shīdì was right. "But I hate the readings!" the Great Sage whined. Or maybe he just hated it when Tang Sanzang read them. He couldn't recall ever having this problem when he'd trained under Subodhi.

"I know." The dragon didn't sound very sympathetic.

Traitor. Sun Wukong sighed. He could handle a reading for today, right? And besides, there would be plenty more kingdoms to explore later! Just gotta think positive! "Okay." He began to walk towards the others with Ao Lie, and as he did so, he grinned at the dragon prince and said, "But you have to let me braid your hair while we listen!"

A small cloud of mist appeared after the dragon snorted. "How many times must I tell you, I am not an actual horse!"

*********************************************

Had it not been for the calming effects that came from braiding Ao Lie's hair, Sun Wukong probably would've strangled Tang Sanzang long before the reading had been over. Today's lesson had been on repentance, and the intention couldn't have been more obvious! Why not just recruit the witch while you're at it! the Monkey King had thought when the monk finally finished.

By then, the time for the banquet finally came, and knowing this made Sun Wukong feel a little better as he and the others made their way through the sea of white and towards the Banquet Hall. The Empress Dowager was already there when they'd arrived and beside her was a younger-looking woman.

"This is Wen-fēi," Liu Ming explained as the woman beside her bowed.

"The mother of our future emperor!" There was a proud look in Wen-fēi's eyes as she said this. "And might I say, what an honor it is to be in the presence of such heroes!"

"The honor is all ours," Tang Sanzang replied. "We're just doing what we can to help."

Or make things worse, Sun Wukong thought bitterly.

"And we appreciate it!" The Empress Dowager said quickly. "Now please, let's all take our seats before everything gets cold." As soon as everyone did, she held a cup in her hand and continued. "But first, a toast to our saviors. May they fare well on the rest of their journey and live ten thousand years!" Unlike earlier, there was somberness in her voice.

"And may the kingdom of Bāoxiāng prosper for ten thousand more!" replied Tang Sanzang, smiling with what appeared to be pity.

"Gānbēi!"

It was no problem for Sun Wukong to drink the wine in a single gulp, his previous frustration nearly completely forgotten. Why let his mood be soured when the mortals were showing such gracious (and delicious) hospitality? Seeing a bowl of peaches just near him, he was about to grab one, until he felt a kick to his leg.

"Not until our host has given permission!" Tang Sanzang said in a harsh whisper.

Sun Wukong glared at the monk, which must've been noticed by Liu Ming, as the Empress Dowager then said, "Please, help yourselves!"

The Monkey King did, ignoring the glance Tang Sanzang was giving him. Smug bastard! Sometimes he hated seniority seating; if it were up to him, he'd sit in between Sha Wujing and Ao Lie, the ones who would never judge him for wanting to do things just a little bit differently every now and then.

"Jiějie," came Wen-fēi's voice, snapping Sun Wukong out of his thoughts. "Will you not drink more wine? Why, you've barely even taken a sip!"

Liu Ming regarded the other woman with a look of clear contempt and she replied, "I will not, Wen-fēi. But if you don't wish for the drink to go to waste, you are more than welcome to have it yourself."

Wen-fēi suddenly looked uncomfortable then, but a servant entered the Banquet Hall before she could reply.

"I apologize for the interruption, Bìxià, Wen-fēi," she said, bowing. "But Diànxià is asking for his—"

"Whatever it is, can't one of the servants handle it?" Wen-fēi sounded irritated.

"They've tried," the servant replied. "But he keeps crying."

Wen-fēi simply gave a deep sigh and rushed out of the Banquet Hall without so much as a bow.

Liu Ming, however, seemed relieved. "Thank you, A-Qing. And please, place this in my bedchambers." She held out her cup. "But make sure no one sees you. Otherwise, that will be all."

The servant seemed just as confused as Sun Wukong felt, but she took the cup from the Empress Dowager anyway, bowed, and left.

"What was that about?" asked the Monkey King.

"Oh, just that my cup was poisoned—just mine, though, so none of you need to worry." Her tone was so casual that she might as well have been talking about the weather.

This didn't stop Sun Wukong from looking at Tang Sanzang with concern while the others pushed their own drinks away. The monk looked pale, but that was likely due to shock more than anything. "Do you feel well, Shīfu?" he asked regardless, his voice urgent. "Shall I go look for medicine?"

"I-I feel fine, Sun-xíngzhě," he replied. The others nodded as well when Sun Wukong looked at them for confirmation, though this clearly didn't do much to lessen the tension.

"You seem far too calm for someone who's just been through an assassination attempt!" said Zhu Bajie. "Two if we count the Lady Bone Demon!"

Liu Ming continued to give off an unconcerned look. "Five, actually."

"Five!?"

"Wen Fan has made it no secret that she wishes to be named empress in my stead," Liu Ming continued. "My husband wasn't one to turn any peerless beauty away and we made a brief alliance when Ivory—er, Lady Bone Demon—arrived, but now that she's gone, things have quickly gone back to normal."

"Er, normal?" said Sha Wujing.

"I can understand." Ao Lie ate a bit of rice before continuing. "I've just about lost count of how many times someone has tried to harm my family." Once again, the tone was casual.

"I'm so glad I remained a monk," Tang Sanzang whispered and Sun Wukong patted his shīfu's shoulder in comfort. The Monkey King had been no stranger to attempts on his life, either, but he couldn't remember ever being as calm about it as Ao Lie and Liu Ming were now. Dealing with demons seemed much easier than having to put up with courtly politics.

"Do you have any children of your own, Bìxià?" Ao Lie asked the Empress Dowager. Both seemed oblivious to the discomfort in the room.

"Three," Liu Ming replied at once. "Only daughters. Two have already been married off, but the third... my little Baihua..." Her voice cracked a bit. "She was meant to be my husband's heir since I couldn't give him a son, but she disappeared thirteen years ago and there's been no trace of her since!"

"My condolences," Tang Sanzang said, his eyes filled with pity. "Should we find your daughter as we proceed with our journey tomorrow, we'll be sure to let you know."

Liu Ming blinked back tears and nodded gratefully.

"Do you think Wen-fēi had something to do with it?" Ao Lie asked.

She shook her head. "She joined us only five years ago. And for all her... ambitions, waiting that long to make herself known would be unlike her."

"Well, that's comforting," Sun Wukong said sarcastically.

"In any case, I plan to address her treason to the council tomorrow." After taking a bite out of a peach, she added, "The cup should be more than enough evidence to finally get her arrested. Then her son, Zhao Jin, will come under only my care until he comes of age."

There it was, that feeling of discomfort again. How was any of this considered normal? I'm lucky my little ones are loyal, Sun Wukong thought, a familiar ache in his heart. How much longer would it be before he could return home? If he ever returned home.

"Do you need protection until tomorrow, Bìxià?" Sha Wujing asked.

The Empress Dowager looked grateful despite the shake of her head. "Xièxie, but I assure you, that's not necessary. I wouldn't still be alive if I didn't already know how to fend for myself." But then she frowned and asked, "But speaking of threats, are you sure imprisoning the Lady Bone Demon was the right idea, lǎoyé? What if she escapes?"

"I assure you, she won't," Tang Sanzang replied gently. "And even if she does break free, it will only be after she's reflected on her actions."

"Which she won't!" Sun Wukong protested, his anger returning. Enough of this! He knew he probably should've held back in front of the Empress Dowager, but he couldn't just sit by as the monk gave this mortal false hope, could he? "We all know she won't. And anyway, her ally is still out there, remember?"

"Sun Wukong—"

The Monkey King interrupted the monk. "She tried to destroy the world, Tang Seng! And she very well would've succeeded if we hadn't shown up to stop her in time! How dare you grant her leniency!"

"How dare I?"

"So you admit the punishment was too light, then! Really, Shīfu, I can't believe you'd be so naive!" Sun Wukong was only barely aware of the shuffling of chairs and Zhu Bajie's glare, barely aware of everyone but himself and Tang Sanzang leaving the Banquet Hall.

This obvious attempt to avoid being witness to a potential fight, however, proved to be unnecessary. Because instead of staying to argue, the Tang Monk simply walked away from Sun Wukong as well. The Monkey King didn't try to stop him.

*********************************************

As a monkey demon made of stone, Sun Wukong didn't need sleep. But even if he did, he knew he wouldn't have been able to anyway. Instead, the Monkey King sat upon a cloud just outside the palace and glared in the direction of the Lady Bone Demon's tomb. Remake the world. Huh! The more he thought about it, the more he realized her desires hadn't been so different from Buddha's teachings. Nirvāṇa and all that. Perhaps that was why Tang Sanzang had decided to show her mercy.

Dāizi! That was the problem with mortals—if they weren't fighting amongst themselves, they became far too trusting for their own good. And then I have to be the one to clean everything up! Not that he minded fighting demons, of course, but was a little backbone from the monk too much to ask for? Maybe then he'd stop getting kidnapped all the time!

Tang Sanzang had been wrong about many things and he was wrong about this, too! The Lady Bone Demon didn't deserve imprisonment, she deserved death! I should've just—

He gasped. Of course! The solution was so obvious! Oh, the monk would be furious, certainly, but what did it matter what he thought? And so what if it would be considered dishonorable to attack an enemy already bound? Someone had to make sure the Lady Bone Demon didn't cause trouble again. He'll thank me for this later. Staff in hand, he began to travel towards the tomb.

Or he would've, had it not been for the chanting. The painfully familiar chanting. "Ahhh!" Sun Wukong keeled over until he fell off his cloud and clutched his head. He then proceeded to scratch at the fillet, though he knew how futile it would be. "Make it stop, make it stop! I'll behave! I promise!" Why had the Bodhisattva of Mercy given the so-called Great Monk such a cruel method to keep him under control?

It took a few seconds, but at last, the chanting—and therefore, the agony—subsided. And he knew this would only happen again, unless, of course, he left the group entirely. It was something he'd thought about so many times now. But Tang Sanzang would never allow that, surely?

"Here." The monk handed him a piece of paper, which Sun Wukong quickly read over.

"Banishment!?" The Monkey King stared at Tang Sanzang, feeling more shocked than angry.

"I wrote it not long after we set out for our journey," Tang Sanzang explained. "I didn't think I'd actually need it, but..." He briefly glanced in the direction of the tomb. "You were right about one thing, Sun Wukong. Not everyone can change. And that seems to include you."

"That's not fair!" Sun Wukong growled and glared at the monk.

"Were you or were you not about to destroy the tomb?"

"I was!" What did he have to be ashamed of?

"Then you tried to disobey my orders."

"Shīfu." Sun Wukong hadn't even noticed the others until Sha Wujing spoke. "Is this really necessary? Wasn't Sun-shīxiōng just trying to do what he thought was right?"

Even Zhu Bajie and Ao Lie seemed to agree with him, with both giving slow nods.

Tang Sanzang sighed, but he kept his face fixed on Sun Wukong. "Do you even wish to stay with us, Sun-xíngzhě?"

Sun Wukong clutched his staff in one hand and crumpled the letter of banishment in the other. "I've made it no secret that I wish to go home, Shīfu."

For the first time, there was no anger or irritation in Tang Sanzang's gaze. Only disappointment. Why did that make him feel worse? "Then gàobié, Sun Wukong. And so help me, if I ever consent to see you again, let me fall into the Avīci Hell!" With that, the monk bowed and then turned away. Zhu Bajie gave Sun Wukong a brief glance and followed after him. Neither gave any sign that they would be returning.

"I-I'm sure Shīfu didn't mean it, A-Kong," said Sha Wujing, glancing slightly downwards and twiddling his fingers while doing so.

"It's likely he'll forget all about this in the morning," Ao Lie added. "You know how Buddhists are. He won't stay angry with you for long."

Sun Wukong gave a mirthless laugh. He wished he had their optimism. "You heard what he said," the monkey demon replied. "He'd much rather go to Hell than see me again! So really, I'm doing both of us a favor." He got on his cloud again, his chest tightening. A side effect from the Tight-Fillet Spell, he told himself. "But you two are welcome to visit Huāguǒshān any time you like. Until then, good luck on the journey to Tiānzhú. But don't listen to either Tang Sanzang or Zhu Bajie, at least not so blindly. Follow your instincts if you feel like something is wrong." It'd worked well for him so far, after all.

"Of course, Dà-shīxiōng," both Sha Wujing and Ao Lie said in unison before exchanging bows with the Monkey King for what would hopefully not be the last time.

Sun Wukong knew he would miss them. And perhaps some part of him would miss Tang Sanzang and Zhu Bajie as well. He had to admit, traveling with them hadn't been as bad as it could've been. But he could no longer tolerate the presence of someone who refused to listen to him, either. This was for the best.

Wasn't it?

Of course it is! Sun Wukong told himself as he rode away on his cloud and straight towards Huāguǒshān. This was what he'd wanted! At last, he was away from the constant reprimands and needless comparisons and especially that damn Tight-Fillet Spell!

Away from... from the kindness he knew the monk was more than capable of expressing, for he had shown it numerous times throughout the journey already. Even towards him.

"If I ever consent to see you again, let me fall into the Avīci Hell!"

Stop that! Sun Wukong shook his head as the monk's final words echoed in his mind. So he had shown a little kindness on occasion while nearly everyone else had scorned him. So what? All they'd done since defeating the Lady Bone Demon was argue, and in the end, none of it had mattered anyway.

What mattered now was finally getting back home, back to his beautiful mountain and loyal monkeys.

Nothing else mattered.

Nothing else mattered!

And perhaps if he told himself this enough times, it would eventually prove true. Even as the tears began to fall.

*********************************************

NOTES

Shīfu (师父): Master

Túdì (徒弟): Disciple

Shīxiōng (师兄): Senior Brother; Dà (大) is used to refer to the eldest.

Shīdì (师弟): Junior Brother

Jiějie (姐姐): elder sister or an unrelated older female friend.

Lǎoyé (老爺): Venerable Father

Xíngzhě (行者): Pilgrim

A-: Friendly diminutive. Always a prefix.

Dāizi (呆子): Idiot; Zhu Bajie is frequently called this in Journey to the West.

Xièxie (謝謝): Thank you

White: Bái (白), representing death, mourning, and purity.

Gānbēi (干杯): literally means dry cup; an equivalent to saying "cheers" after a toast has been given. Guests are expected to empty their cup in one motion.

Ten thousand years: Wànsuì (萬歲), a phrase used to wish long life.

Fēi (妃): consort

Bìxià (陛下): Majesty

Diànxià (殿下): Highness

Tang Seng (唐僧): Tang Sanzang's courtesy name, the name one receives at adulthood.

Subodhi (須菩提): a disciple of Buddha and Sun Wukong's first mentor.

Gàobié (告别): farewell

Nirvāṇa: A state in which there is neither desire nor suffering, the breaking of karma and the cycle of reincarnation. It is the ultimate goal of Buddhism. I talk about it a bit more here.

Tiānzhú (天竺): India

Huāguǒshān (花果山): Flower-Fruit Mountain

Avīci: one of the twenty-one naraka (hell) in Hinduism and Buddhism, as well as its lowest level. Reserved for those who have committed severe crimes.

Bāoxiāng (寶象): called Precious Image Kingdom in the Anthony Yu translation of Journey to the West, one of the many kingdoms the Pilgrims come across.

In the original story, after Sun Wukong gets exiled for killing Lady White Bone (with Tang Sanzang thinking the Monkey King had simply killed innocents three times over), the Pilgrims meet the kidnapped third princess of the kingdom, nicknamed Bǎihuāxiū (百花羞/Hundred Flowers' Shame) and it's soon revealed that she'd been taken by Huángpáoguài (黄袍怪/Yellow Robe Demon).

After escaping said demon and traveling to the kingdom, the Pilgrims inform the king of his daughter's whereabouts. Zhu Bajie and Sha Wujing agree to rescue her, but both disciples are quickly beaten, with Sha Wujing even getting captured as well while Zhu Bajie goes into hiding.

After getting denial of her involvement, Yellow Robe decides to shift himself into a human and visit his father-in-law, where he then proceeds to tell the king how he had saved the princess from a shapeshifting tiger demon, married her, and then accuses Tripitaka of being that same shapeshifting tiger demon after creating an illusion around the monk. The king immediately believes him and has Tang Sanzang apprehended.

With Sun Wukong still gone and the others indisposed in some way or another, Ao Lie (whose name actually comes from adaptations, not the original novel itself) attempts to stop the demon himself by transforming into a palace maiden and attempting to stab Yellow Robe while doing a sword dance, but he ultimately fails as well, getting his leg injured in the process. Zhu Bajie finds him and—not for the first time—expresses a desire to just quit the pilgrimage altogether until Ao Lie calls him out on this and tells him to get Sun Wukong, which he eventually does.

Both the princess and Sha Wujing are rescued after Sun Wukong kills her and Yellow Robe's young children and Monkey soon figures out that the demon actually came from Heaven, with his true identity being Revatī, the Wood-Wolf Star (Zeta Piscium). As it turns out, the princess herself was once a celestial jade girl in charge of tending to the incense. One day, she fell in love with Revatī and he with her, but believing their love to be star-crossed (pun absolutely intended), the two agree to go down to Earth to be together. Revatī is then apprehended and after the princess explains everything to her father, Tripitaka is freed and the Pilgrims carry on with their journey to the West afterwards.

[femme-historian]

Hii :)

If I don’t bother and you accept questions I would really like to talk about something it‘s more of a question and if you‘re not comfortable talking about this please feel free to ignore it. But I saw a lot of discourse again lately on the topic of bisexual butches. And I personally have always thought these labels like femme and butch are only lesbians labels because it’s also mostly shown like that on the internet but then I saw a documentary „gender outlaw“ with Leslie Feinberg in it talking for a really short moment about bi butches and I was/still am kind confused because I also saw a lot of people with the butch flag as their profile pic but with „bi“ in their bio. I really don’t know what to think about it because it‘s not my place to say how anyone identifies but I thought butch/femme was also about distancing yourself from men completely. But when I saw Leslie Feinberg (my favourite lesbian icon) talking about it it really got me thinking. But on the other hand maybe they just said bi butches because their wasn‘t that much other labels for masc presenting bi women these days and nowadays a lot of bi women call themselves masc which I personally feel more comfortable with instead of them calling themselves „bi butches“.. I don‘t know really. I’m not trying to be disrespectful or anything. English is not my first language so I hope I didn’t write anything harmful but this topic really bothers me. I asked someone before on here which has helped me a bit but I couldn’t take their answer completely serious because they also said that bi women/butches dating men would make their relationship queer.. and I really wouldn’t go that far..

Can you please tell me your thoughts on this ?

Hi! I apologize for the late response. I understand your questioning. I think it can be generative for us to look in the past to base our understandings of “Self.” Butch-femme is a departure from heterosexism and patriarchy. Butches and femmes do not have to be butch-femme (as in coupled; these identities exist separately as well) I can’t speak for butches or bisexuals, but yes, bisexual people who self-identified as butch did exist. But when we study the past, we have to make sure to yes, see reflections of ourselves but also not flatten the complexities of their identities! We don’t know for certain if every bisexual butch identified with Butch as an identity and not just an aesthetic.

From what I understand talking to lesbian elders, butch as a descriptor was also used to describe loosely ‘masculine’ fashion and dress alongside being used derogatorily. However, the past is not the only place to generate identifications. It’s not my place to police other people’s identities. Bisexual butches exist simply because people identify as that! It really is that simple! I will say that butch and femme are primarily Lesbian identifications. Just like anything from the past, especially Queer histories, there were people who disagreed and agreed on whether butch and femme should only be exclusive to lesbians. The fact that you see multiple perspectives doesn’t mean someone is right or wrong per se, but you are seeing the multiplicity and beauty of Queer history!

As for bisexual butch cis women who date cishet men and call their relationships queer…. I wouldn’t say that’s queer at all! Because they read as a heterosexual couple.

This is long and hope it helps!

XOXO

bunny (the femme historian)

[krishu213]

But this is not your choice or anyone elses to make. Its embarrassing how you guys complain and even compare Romance Club to Choices! Have you lost all sense of behavior? Many of us wanted Chasing You 2. But many of us didnt want a book written by the fucking bully or a crap book written by an idiot in Australia. But people demanded an Egypt Story and what happened? Its Kali 2.0 and sucks. So give them the benefit of the doubt instead of roasting them and treat Ursa with the love she deserves.

hi there anon...i hope you are doing well

Well i would like to first clarify certain things..before i give answer.

Please see that i or any other person we dont have anything against ursa.She is a good writer and i love her books.

now coming to the answer.See, i do have problem with developers and not writer .Thus, we complain about developers and not writers.I think you must have noticed that in the post we are not saying anything against ursa, we are saying it about RC .And about comparing to choices, i believe that you are wrong , we are not comparing, we are just expressing our thought that "we dont want rc to go choices way due to a certain book sequel trauma we all got..."So, i believe in no way we are comparing rc to choices..We just dont want it to go choices app way and thus by writing this its clear that we are not comparing ,just saying it as a caution .

I am really happy for the peiple who wanted CY2 , and at the same time i am sure that every one has right to express opinion and we are just expressing our thought .And once again i will say it here we are not bashing the book or writer , we are expressing our disappointment to developers.

See we are not developers, and we dont have a say about which genres to come next. Like you, i am disappointed with developers for bringing out new books or genres continously on a spree without seeing what actually players need.

Well i am really sad and angry that such a demanded genre(egypt) was demanded long back but they never gave it and when they decided to give it, it was by certain some one writer whom i completely hate. by the way if you really wanna play a good egypt theme book , i suggest you try to ' Tablet of Iset' book from league of dreamers app .Its a beautiful book giving perfect ancient egypt vibes.To know more about book feel free to message me .

And again we are not roasting just giving an opinion.And everyone free to agree or disagree.

I hope you have a nice day.

[poedameronthighs]

Hey everyone! I've had this blog for several months now and I'm only just getting around to do this hahaha oops

This blog is my sideblog for posting and reblogging reader x content and it is an 18+ only blog. MINORS DNI.

I follow from @dameronalone

All the goods are below the cut ;)

Requests:

Always feel free to drop in with any of your own thoughts/headcanons/

Headcanons - OPEN FOR ANYONE

Prompt lists - OPEN as long as I've reblogged one in the past like week

Drabble requests - ONLY if we're moots

Rules:

(going to briefly mention some heavy topics in point 6)

Always check to see if requests are open. They are always open to mutual but not always to everyone else

I reserve the right to say no. If I do so, please do not repeatedly ask for something. If you send in an anonymous ask and don't get a response, do not send another ask of the same time

reader will always be autistic/adhd disabled because I am autistic/adhd disabled. Most of the characters I write for, I write as autistic/adhd disabled. This is non-negotiable

I mostly write gn!reader, with afab!gn!reader for most of the smuts I write, but I also write tranmasc, fem, and masc readers. But by default I typically write gn!reader. I also never use y/n. If the reader has a nickname I will put it in the A/N

PLEASE preface any request with tw/cw for any content that could be questionable

ABSOLUTELY preface any request with tags regarding: sui, self-harm, SA, physical, emotional, mental abuse, especially having to do with family, child abuse, and ableism.

If you send anything regarding those topics or any other heavy topic without warnings, I will block you

Do not spam ask. I see everything I get in my inbox but a lot of times it will take me a day or two to answer it if it's a request because I don't always have the spoons for it. This blog is first and foremost a way for me to have fun and I'm not going to break my back for it

The block button is my friend. Please don't take it personally if you find I've blocked you

Don't information mine. I'm not here to educate you about disability. Don't question my theories. They're my theories you don't have to agree. Do NOT come onto my posts and disagree with my headcanons. What the fuck. I will block you. Make your own post. I am not here to defend myself to strangers on the internet I am here to have fun. I have even been called fun by some people that know me

DNI with any tagged with my self-ship tag unless you're a mutual it makes me very uncomfortable and I will block you

If you have a request for a character you're not sure if I write for or would like a clarification OR want to run an idea by me before requesting it, just shoot me a dm :)

I know I sound pretty harsh up there but I'm just taking care of myself & curating my own internet experience. basically as long as you aren't a jerk to me you're welcome to be here <3

Now to the fun stuff!

Fandoms/Characters

Star Wars

Poe Dameron

Cassian Andor

Bix Caleen

Din Djarin

Jyn Erso

Moon Knight

Marc Spector

Jake Lockley

Steven Grant

Layla el-Faouly

Triple Frontier

Santiago Garcia

Frankie Morales

Benny Miller

Will Miller

Marvel

Loki

Sylvie

The list may change as my interests do but you can never go wrong with Poe Dameron (or another Oscar character)

Any characters that are italicized are my preference in each fandom. For moon knight, I like them all equally

MASTERLIST

[hoghtastic]

https://www.tumblr.com/hoghtastic/759267157724086272/the-subject-is-so-old-that-it-doesnt-need-much

“The subject is so old it doesn’t need explaining”

But even when the stuff was first brought up that was the excuse, or it was “because we just know” because we can just tell” “if you can’t use your eyes then that’s on you” and not one example or shred of proof was shown except for the only 3 speculated situations you all have been dragging on for over a year now. It’s getting to a point that you are just using any little thing you can grasp at to be disrespectful? All for what? Because you don’t like the fact that she’s dating someone you’ll never be with. It’s that weird parasocial relationship stuff that suddenly doesn’t apply to you because you just have “gut feelings” you don’t know these people and I bet damn well you people wouldn’t ever say this kind of stuff to either of their faces? Until you actually shown proof of anything, everything you say is just a baseless rumor or a quick jealous thought that crossed your mind that you had to share and label it as fact because of your “intuition”. It’s quite literally delusional at this point.

Anon to anon, in response to this ask. 😊

Personally, I totally understand that you don't agree with some of the opinions shared here and/or have a different perspective, which you're totally entitled to. However, no one is being disrespectful. This is a gossip blog after all, and people are just freely sharing their thoughts and opinions on different topics related to Alex, including his girlfriend, which sometimes are based on more "solid evidence" (such as interviews and screenshots), and other times rely more on interpretation, which is of course subjective and varies from person to person. We're just here to discuss in a free, lighthearted way — like any other gossip blog or page. No one claims to own the truth and no one is trying to convince anyone of anything. I like to believe that we're all adults here, anyway, who are capable of gathering info from various sources and form their own opinions, whatever they might be, and even change said opinions if they choose to do so.

So please, tell us how much you love Johanne, how pretty she is, how divinely she sings, how much of a kind heart she has, without criticizing others for disagreeing with you — and vice-versa, of course. We welcome and accept all opinions, but not personal attacks or policing. Thank you for understanding. 😊

[anakinskywalkerog]

omg oli hiii! no worries at all hehe, i was sorta worried because of the oli drought lol

actually me and eli broke up like last week lmao. my friend was the one who suggested it - he was like, "dude. you dont seem interested in your relationship at all anymore. hes dating you thinking you still like him, which is unfair. i genuinely think you like han more than eli at this point; if what you said about getting the feeling of him not really keeping to himself is true, then break up, for both of your sakes."

so i did 🤷‍♀️

but yes i love 'I Can See You', all of the vault tracks are so good! foolish one was written for me lolol. and timeless is so perfect. "in the 1500s in a foreign land"??? ma'am, queen taylor has slayed again. or should i say, queen slaylor?

lmao i agree with the seasoning part. existence is too boring indeed. although i disagree with using the crush thingy. i don't REALLY like him, sort of just an attraction. in fact its over too lol. he texted me and we talked for a little bit and everything has gone back to how it was before anything turned up 💀 i get the ick quite easily

oh no! im sorry! im sure it will, but in the meantine, if you ever need, i'm always here :)

he did lmao! it took a lot of begging, and a lot of flat out refusal ("i cant write that! thats objectification! "consensual objectification!" "... no way i can do that. id be scarred." "its fine just do just do it pleaaaaase!" "lmao i cannot write smut about you both, thats too far, even for me, canberry." "...what about all of the smut you read then-") (not sure what gave him that impression but i am a college student, what am i, mary jane? i could, but i wont 🤭) cranberry asked after i wrote a sort of drabble for his friend (who also asked, but he gives highkey gay vibes lol. he and his gym bro and both crazy) back in january, but i flat out refused. and then something my friend posted on her story after one of our finals made me go "... no way, but i actually have a great idea"

ergo it happened!

but its definitely platonic lolol im sort of their only friend with such *amazing* writing skills ;) their exact words were "but youre the only person we know who writes fanfiction, please please please"

lmao i have no clue, just being crazy with their boys i guess lol.

hopefully! definitely did not seem that way from his messages, but maybe im wrong. ill give it a couple of months? plus, i have not been blocked, or removed from his stories, and he did enjoy reading it (bros was laughing so hard he couldnt even read)

lmaooo me too! we would be so iconic. feel free to drama dump anytime lmaoo. i am officially a *tumblr user who gets asks* (proud smiling) hehe 😈

i also cooked my own curry for the first time today hehe that was interesting

lmao i will try, thank you for the tip <3

love, sythe <3

sorry it took me so long to reply, sythe!!

1) don’t be worried about oli droughts, I just get busy but everything is fine!

2) sorry to hear about eli 😭 damn. but also rip and thank u next, you know what I’m sayin

3) foolish one was written for all us tumblr girlies!! lololol. but also, you don’t have to have a CRUSH just to have a lil crush. like, just a lil makin eyes on occasion makes life less boring hehe

4) truly CANNOT imagine anyone in my real life asking me to write them fanfic let alone a BOY let alone SMUT that is a crazy story

🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡 (ps have you watched Ahsoka yet)

[scara94]

PAX by Sara Pennypacker - Spoiler Free- Review

Howdy folks, 

 Once again everything written here is just my opinion you do not have to agree or disagree with anything I say in this review. if you feel like leaving a comment to discuss please do, but try to keep it as spoiler-free as you can. 

 I don’t feel like I can do specific pros and cons without giving away any spoilers so I will be just giving my overall thoughts and if anyone wants to know specifics I might do another post. 

---------------

A coming of age story about the unbreakable bond between boy and fox.

Overall thoughts.

I gave it 5 stars. I loved this book so much and I would recommend it to anyone. I finished it in one day, I could not put it down. I really feel like this is definitely a future classic children’s book. Peter and Pax are separated and must find their way back to each other, on their journey; they both find out more about themselves and where they belong. It is such a simple concept and not massively original when I describe it that way. However, Sara Pennypacker writes these characters and their emotions so beautifully. I expected to go into this book and not be interested in Peter’s story. I just wanted to read about the cute fox dammit! But oh boy, did Peter’s journey take me by surprise. This is a kid who has had a lot happen in his life and as a 12-year-old has no idea who he is and how to process anything that he feels because of his environment and not once did it feel out of place.

Pennypacker dealt with the pretty serious topics of war, abandonment, and grief. How, it affects different people in different ways in such a poignant and moving approach. I never once felt that she ever dumbed it down or glossed over it ‘because it’s for children’. No, she was honest and it really does pack a punch. She took time to let you digest the emotions that the characters were feeling while not stalling the plot. (Which I was very grateful for because that’s a very big pet peeve of mine. Just because children are young doesn’t mean they are dumb!) So, yes. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who has kids, nieces, nephews, cousins, or even if you want to read about found family, self-discovery, love and loyalty. because I really do think this book will speak to anyone. Also, come on. Cute fox is all you need. We stan fuzzy boy!    

[cuttoothed]

Fic for day 3 of @jonmartinweek for the prompt "Healing & Recovery". We've all been saying jmart need a lot of therapy after the finale, so...yeah.

Disclaimer: I have never been to couple's therapy. I have done some reading on it, but this is not intended in any way to accurately reflect real world therapy practices. Please just assume that anything "off" is due to the way couple's therapy is practiced in AU-land (though of course feel free to let me know if you spot anything egregious).

*

“Why don’t you start,” Judith suggests, “By telling me about the incident?”

The two men on the sofa give her identical startled looks, as if she’s uncovered something incriminating. Martin seems to regain his composure first; he clears his throat, and his hand moves to cover Jon’s, unconsciously protective.

“Sorry, wh-what do you mean by “incident”?”

“For most couples who come to see me, there’s an...inciting incident,” Judith explains. “Something that makes them realize they could use some professional support to work through things. Of course any couple can benefit from seeing a therapist together on occasion, to deal with small issues before they become big ones. But, well, it’s the same way that everyone knows they should go for regular check ups with their GP rather than waiting until they actually get sick—it’s just not something most people get around to until they need it.”

She pauses to give them time to consider that, and after a moment Jon nods, looking mildly embarrassed.

“Right,” he says. “That’s, ah, I think that’s fair.”

“There are pretty strong extenuating circumstances, though,” Martin huffs defensively. “We didn’t exactly have the option for therapy in the a—wh-where we lived before.”

“It’s not intended as a criticism,” Judith tells him. “You’ve chosen to talk to a therapist, and that’s a big step—one that many people never take. You’re ahead of the curve, Martin.”

Martin looks mollified at that; he’s clearly a bit touchy about perceived criticisms of their relationship, and Judith doesn’t want to get him on the defensive. She gives them both an encouraging smile.

“So,” she says. “Is there an incident you’d like to talk about?”

The two of them look at each other expectantly, as if each is waiting for the other to start. After several long moments of silence, Jon raises his eyebrows meaningfully, and Martin sighs.

“Fine,” he says. “So, we, uh, we recently realized that our...garden was a-a bit of a mess. So we—Jon and I—we get together with our...housemates, to figure out what kind of flowers we should plant. Fuschias or—or hydrangeas. ”

He pauses to glance nervously at Jon, who gives him a reassuring nod, squeezing his hand.

Right, Judith thinks, This is probably not about flowers.

“We agree we all want fuschias,” Martin continues, “Except Jon—he wanted hydrangeas. But we took a vote, and it was fuschias.”

“Except of course most of our—our housemates weren’t there for that meeting,” Jon interjects, folding his arms across his chest.

“Yes, but we agreed we couldn’t wait to ask every single person,” Martin says sharply, back on the defensive. Jon’s brow furrows and his mouth opens as if to say something, but he changes his mind and shuts it again. Conflict aversion is one of the most common dysfunctions Judith sees in the couples she treats; very few people want to disagree with the person they love, and even fewer know how to have a constructive conflict. She makes a mental note of it for later.

“Go ahead, Martin,’ she suggests gently. Martin looks unhappy, but continues.

“So we agree to plant the fuschias the next day, but Jon—Jon sneaks out in the middle of the night and starts, uh, planting hydrangeas. Without telling anyone.”

Without telling me, Judith hears in his hurt tone. Jon’s arms are still folded, and he’s almost squirming in his seat with the effort to not interject; Judith decides it’s a good time to invite him into the story.

“Jon, why did you feel so strongly about the hydrangeas?”

“It’s—it wasn’t that I wanted hydrangeas, I just couldn’t a-accept the idea of—of fuchsias.”

“Couldn’t allow it, you mean,” Martin grumbles. Judith lets it pass and continues to focus on Jon.

“Why is that?”

“They, uh, they spread…” Jon waves his hands vaguely. “Their—their...roots? They would get into the, uh, the neighbors’ gardens, completely take over, destroy everything.”

“Potentially,” Martin insists. “There was no guarantee—”

“There was no reason they wouldn’t,” Jon snaps.

By now Judith is not only sure that this has nothing to do with gardening, but suspects that neither of these men has ever seen a fuchsia in their lives. It’s fine, though. This is far from the first time a client has invented a story out of whole cloth so they can work through something uncomfortable without actually describing it. And this is their first session; Judith hopes in the future they’ll trust her enough to give her the real story.

“Remember,” she tells them. “We’re not here to decide that someone was objectively right or wrong, we’re here to help you understand each other and improve your communication skills.”

“Right,” Martin mutters, unconvinced. Jon’s expression is distressed, but he continues.

“There was no other choice,” he says wearily. “The only other option was—was azaleas, and I know you didn’t want that, Martin.”

“Absolutely not.” Martin sounds horrified. “But hydrangeas, Jon? Do you really think that was a better option?”

“You have to see the difference.” Jon’s tone goes stiff and incredulous, as if he’s winding up for a lecture, and Judith decides to cut that off before it starts.

“So what I’m hearing,” she says, “Is that you both had very strong, conflicting opinions on this topic. And that’s okay—it’s okay for you to disagree, even on something important. You’re not always going to agree on what the right thing to do is. Often there is no single “right thing,” so it comes down to how the different choices make us feel.”

“That doesn’t seem like a good way to make a decision that affects the wh—a lot of people.” Jon clearly considers that his opinion on not-flowers was the objectively correct one. Judith smiles.

“People aren’t computers, Jon. Even the most logical minded person in the world is influenced by their feelings—about important issues, about other people. You’d be surprised at how much of our decision making is rooted in emotion; either how we anticipate the outcome of our decision will make us feel, or how we are feeling in the immediate moment of the choice.”

A spasm of something that might be grief or pain flashes across Jon’s face, and he leans unconsciously in Martin’s direction. Martin’s arm instantly goes around him, offering comfort without thought. It’s clear that these two love each other deeply, unquestioningly—and that’s also part of the problem. When someone you love thinks that you’re wrong about something that’s important to you, it can feel like a rejection of your entire self.

“I’d like to pause this discussion for now, and try a little exercise,” she says. Jon nods, sitting back up and disengaging from Martin’s embrace; Martin looks attentively at her, though his expression is unsure.

“One of the biggest challenges we face with people we love is recognizing that they are separate from us. I know—” she says, raising her hands to stop the objections she can already see forming on their lips. “Of course you know that you’re separate people. We all know that, rationally. But emotionally, it’s natural to see the people you’re close to as extensions of yourself—it’s an evolutionary impulse to aid group bonding. It happens with friends and family, and it’s an even stronger impulse between partners.

“We have to do a lot of work to truly internalize the idea that the people we love have their own inner emotional lives that drive their opinions and decisions. But once you are able to fully grasp that truth, it makes disagreeing with the person you love feel less emotionally fraught; it’s a powerful tool for navigating conflict constructively.”

Jon is frowning, but it’s in consideration rather than disapproval. Martin still looks skeptical, his body language defensive, though he doesn’t say anything. That’s probably the best she’s going to get for now, Judith thinks.

“So,” she says. “The exercise is this: I’d like each of you to take a few moments to think, and then tell the other person something about yourself. Not a fact, but something that you feel. And I would like you to listen without interrupting when your partner tells you their feeling. Can you each do that?”

“I, ah—” Jon’s frown deepens. “That’s...rather difficult to do on demand.”

“I know,” says Judith with sympathy. “That’s why I’m here, to support you both in doing the difficult things. If it was easy, you wouldn’t need a therapist to facilitate.”

“Right,” says Jon. “Okay.”

“Martin?”

“Fine,” he says, but his tone is reluctant. Judith gets it; vulnerability is hard enough in front of someone you love, never mind with a stranger in the room. It’s easier to pretend that it’s pointless, that you’re not really putting yourself out there to be hurt. She has the feeling that Martin is someone who would rather avoid being hurt, even if it means closing himself off.

“All right,” she says. “When you’re ready, Jon, would you mind going first? No rush, take all the time you need.” Hopefully, seeing Jon take the first step might help Martin get over some of his defensiveness.

“Oh,” he says, and for a few moments his expression devolves into one of intense concentration. Then he nods, turning towards Martin.

“Start with “I feel”,” Judith suggests.

“All right,” he says, breathless with nerves. “I, uh, I feel...responsible. For—well, for everything, basically. And for everyone. Bad things have happened to people, and it’s my fault, because I should have done something. Everything that happened, back there, it was all because of me.”

“It wasn’t you, Jon!” Martin protests. “Annabelle told us—”

Judith is about to remind him that he’s supposed to just be listening, but he cuts himself off first. Jon laughs, an ugly sound that’s more like a sob.

“And how is that supposed to help? Knowing that the—that they were using me my whole life, how does that absolve me of any responsibility for what I did? For the fact that I failed to do anything to stop them? I couldn’t even go through with the one thing that could have actually meant something, because—”

He clamps his mouth shut, his jaw locked tight; Martin looks down at his hands, his expression distraught.

“Because of me.”

“Martin—” Jon’s tone is wounded, and he reaches for Martin’s hand. Judith sees reflections of a shared pain in both their faces, though she doesn’t understand why; this would be a lot easier if they’d just tell her the truth.

But you didn’t get into this profession because it was easy, did you?

“Thank you for sharing that, Jon. I think there’s a lot more for us to explore there, but let’s give you a break and give Martin a chance to share, okay?”

Jon nods, clutching Martin’s hand in his. Martin gives a long, slow exhale.

“Righto,” he says with false, brittle cheer. “”I feel,” wasn’t it? Right. Jon, when you do something stupidly self-sacrificing for other people, I feel like everyone else is more important than me.”

Jon flinches.

“Martin,” Judith says, keeping her tone level. “Let’s keep the focus on what you feel, not on what causes you to feel that way, okay?”

“Right,” Martin mutters, and glances at Jon. “Okay. In that case, I feel...like I’m not important. Like the only thing I can really do is—is take care of you. And if I can’t even do that, then what bloody use am I? That’s it, I suppose.”

“Martin…” Jon says again, softly. His eyes are wet, and he’s clinging to Martin’s hand like a drowning man to a plank. Martin swallows hard and shakes his head, but he makes no move to extract his hand from Jon’s grip.

“Thank you, Martin,” Judith tells him. “I know that wasn’t easy to share, for either of you. But this is the kind of honesty that we need, in order to build strong communication. Let’s all take five minutes—if either of you want to take a bathroom break, or get some water—and then we can talk about where to go from here. All right?”

Martin disappears to the loo, while Jon wanders around the office, looking with polite interest at the shelves of books and ornaments. Judith writes a few notes for herself, to follow up in future sessions. She hopes there’ll be future sessions. Both of these men seem deeply hurt, traumatized by events that they’re just barely alluding to, and have clearly been struggling through as best they can with less than ideal coping mechanisms, trying—and likely failing—not to hurt each other in the process. They both need individual counselling as much as couples’ therapy—maybe more. She’s certainly going to recommend it..

They clearly love each other, though. And they want to make it work. If they’re willing to put the effort in, they have better than even odds in their favor.

Martin’s eyes are red-rimmed when he returns; he sits on the sofa as near as he can to Jon, who presses their shoulders together. Judith can’t help smiling at the sight.

“How long have the two of you been together?” she asks. She always asks new clients at the end of the first session, rather than at the beginning; that way she can get a feel for the relationship without preconceptions based on longevity. The two of them look at each other properly, for the first time since Martin came back in, and matching, sheepish smiles break out on both their faces after a moment.

“So it was three weeks in Scotland,” Martin begins, ticking it off on his fingers. “And then—how long?”

“Uhh, it’s...let’s say half a year, give or take?” Jon makes a face that says he’s really not all that sure.

“Right, and then we’ve been here nearly six months. So...about a year, all in all?”

“But we knew each other for over three years before that,” Jon insists earnestly.

“It sounds as if the two of you have been through a lot,” says Judith. “And not all of it gardening related?”

“No,” Jon says with a self-deprecating chuckle. “Mostly not.”

“We barely scratched the surface today—and that’s normal. Relationships are complicated, and it takes a lot of time and hard work to build understanding and communication. But I promise you, it is worth all the effort. You both made a really strong start today—it takes courage to be that honest, even with your partner.”

The two of them give each other a long look, and the smile they trade is tentative, but genuine. They haven’t solved anything today, have only just begun to reveal their hurt and their insecurities; they have a long journey ahead to get to a truly honest, healthy place both for themselves and their relationship. Judith has a feeling they’ll persevere, though—that losing each other simply isn’t an option.

“So,” she says, “Should we make this a recurring appointment?”

Jon glances questioningly at Martin, who bites his lip and then nods firmly, taking Jon’s hand in his.

“Yeah,” Martin says. “We’ve done much harder things. We can do this.”

“Together?” says Jon, and Martin smiles.

“No matter what.”