#and immediately went ‘aroace’

[opheliaweeps]

hear me out:

aro-ace han sooyoung who always gives the first look at whatever new thing she’s written to the reader she saved, who will steal food and generally annoy but always stick with the protagonist she created, who lives in a big house with the group of people she’s chosen to survive with no matter which hsy she was.

aro-ace han sooyoung who runs small errands and lives life with the people she calls her family (something she never thought she’d have), who raises the kids with the others and let’s them be kids, who’s a writer who knows her dreamer and regressor better than she knows anyone in the whole world, maybe even herself (they know her in return, and never let her go).

aro-ace han sooyoung and she’s never been more loved than in this soft, golden epilogue that won’t stop writing itself, not for as long as she loves it and loves them, not for as long as her pen can hold ink and her mind can tell stories. she’s mean and greedy and selfish and sneaky, but she’s found something good, and she’s never going to let go.

[cryptids-lair-of-hyperfixations]

i just think this deserves to be posted after my last post LOL

[thepartyishere]

my neurons not connecting for a second like aro... sexual?? what? ah asexual

[athina-blaine]

I'd like to take a moment to point out to detractors of ships involving Laios who feel that "Laios wouldn't take any interest in people!" that he'd hyperfixated on Shuro so badly it was ruining the man's life lmao

[leucoratia]

If possible, I would really love to see a headcannons list for Jotakak (kinda similar to the Avpol headcannons). I love this duo and the possible romantic chemistry was so fun! Thanks :D

Hi, I’m Leucoratia and I write headcanons ands fics (sometimes)! If you want to request anything, see my rules and characters list!

*Twirls hair* Haha I’m sooo normal about them

Jotakak. Ladies and gentlemen, JOTAKAK. I love this pair so, so so much it’s a borderline obsession. These headcanons are going to be very influenced about my HCs for the characters’ personalities as well as sexualities (bcs even though Part 3 is my favourite part I can agree that it’s characters aren’t very fleshed-out).

This ask kind of escaped my control, I'm sorry it took so long to answer but balancing my first full-time job was very tricky! I'm not sure it's exactly what you expected because I explored how they got together and how they feel for each other more than misc headcanons, but I think it's still enjoyable :)

Note that I headcanon Jotaro as aroace, hence Jotakak is more of a queerplatonic relationship than a romance. Being allo myself, I don’t have any hindsight from the aroace experience and did my best to accurately portray an aroace person in a relationship. Please do tell if you have any comments or remarks about my portrayal of aroace people so I can do better!

TW: angst. a lot of angst. But it ends well I promise :>

Noriaki Kakyoin in Jotakak HC:

-So I hc Kakyoin as gay, so even in his fleshbud-possessed brain, he wanted to be an extra bitch to impress the local tall dark and handsome upon their first meeting.

-Like he had set up a whole scene, standing mysteriously on top of the stairs with his scarf flowing in the wind, you can’t tell me he didn’t want to swoon Jotaro right off his feet.

-(And that he did lmao)

-Kakyoin has some relationship experience, so he realizes pretty quickly that he has a crush on the other teen. He would be more attracted to Jotaro’s personality and traits than his body, although he can’t deny that he finds him very attractive.

-The redhead is a man of honor, hence he would only respect someone of the same caliber as he. In the beginning, he looked down upon the other man for his attitude, but quickly warmed up to him and truly started to value him after he proved time and time again how far he was willing to go for those he loved.

-Kakyoin truly realized his crush on Jotaro after the battling the Lovers:

“As they reunited after Jotaro defeated Steely Dan, Kaykoin allowed his eyes to graze the other man’s form. Jotaro was covered in cuts and bruises, blood trailing down his lips and brow, melting into his opal eyes. His breath hitched as he noticed the shoe imprints in his back. Just how much had he swallowed up for the sake of his grandfather? As Joseph fretted over his grandson, Kakyoin took in the teen’s ever-so determined aura. Even beat up and humiliated, his look retained an undying sense of determination and duty.

Jotaro had wordlessly trust him and his stand to keep The Lovers from hurting him and anyone else as it flew back to Steely Dan, relied entirely on Kakyoin’s ability to defeat the stand and save his grandfather as he was himself getting beat up and ridiculed in public. This realization filled the teen with a deep sense of respect for the other man, and even more so of admiration.

That day, Kakyoin knew his feelings for Jotaro were no longer those of a friend.”

-After realizing his feelings, he would try to be cool about it and stay the same. Keyword “try”.

-He’s so fucking stupid omg

-He would try to be coolTM all the time to impress. Kakyoin would be the type to infodump about literally anything and be like “Haha Jotaro did you know that sea snakes like Hydrophis cyanocinctus can breathe through their skin”.

-That’s his way of flirting btw.

-Sooooo akward and stupid about it. His cool guy persona does NOT work he is a certified nerd and would absolutely stop breathing when his eyes lock with his crush’s.

-If Jotaro shows the slightest bit of interest in what Kakyoin is saying he’ll talk his ear off with fun facts and videogame lore.

-Would probably make the first move. Kakyoin is a very thorough individual, and feelings are no different. This man made up at least 26 scenarios and planned a different speech for each and every one.

-It definitely keeps him awake at night.

-His love language would be words of affirmation, acts of service and quality time. Every night during their journey the two would meet in each other’s rooms and chill.

“What are you reading Jotaro?

-Marine Life magazine, he muttered, nose deep between the pages.

-Cool,” replied Kakyoin in a soft tone.” Tell me about it?”

Jotaro stayed silent for a few seconds before flipping all the way back to page 3. He cleared his throat and started reading:

“Sea stars belong to the phylum Echinodermata. That means they are related to sand dollars, sea urchins, sea cucumbers, and sea lilies. Overall, this phylum contains approximately 7,000 species”… Did you know that starfish have more than one stomach?

-I didn’t.” Kakyoin rested his hand on his chin, eyes locked on the other man with a dreamy, love-struck look “Keep going.”

Jotaro Kujo in Jotakak HCs:

-So keep in mind that to me Jotaro is an aroace KING so the feelings he harbors for Noriaki are not romantic. Which doesn’t mean this man wouldn’t die for him in a heartbeat.

-At first he didn’t think much of the redhead; although the more they traveled together, the closer they got. After all, it is nice to have someone else his age around during this whole mess.

-Jotaro was in a relationship exactly once (1) in middle school, to cross that item off his bucket list. Even then, he didn’t feel any of the so-called butterflies and giddiness. Must have not been the right girl.

-Aromanticism wasn’t spoken of very much in the 1980’s, especially in Japan, so all his life Jotaro thought that he hadn’t met the “right person” yet. Looking at fellow classmates, he failed to find a single one to his taste during his fourteen years of attending school.

-Holly joked around with her husband that their son was a very picky young man, and the teen ended up using that to justify why he never felt romantic love.

-Jotaro realized something was “wrong” with him when the topic of sexuality came into the picture in high school. Teen boys were passing around lewd magazines and sharing stories of their first times, all while the young man remained puzzled on what was so interesting about a pair of tits. Or a penis for that matter. Sure, men and women were beautiful to look at, but that was it.

-When he understood that everyone else was serious about all they were saying, he started to question himself and think something was wrong with him. Why can’t he be in love? Is his brain fucked up? Is he doomed to be alone forever and push everyone away?

-As he and other grew up, he found himself less and less in his friends and started to grow apart from them. He didn’t feel understood anymore.

-That changed when he met Kakyoin. Kakyoin who didn’t judge, Kakyoin who wouldn’t brag about girls and put him on the line for having no experience, Kakyoing who seemed to be a never-ending pit of random knowledge, Kakyoin who listened.

-Although the Joestar didn’t think much of him at first, he quickly started to appreciate him, slowly breaking his tough-cool-guy shell to expose the teenager underneath.

-He and Noriaki connect like he never did with anyone else. They fight over who knows more about a specific species of starfish (Jotaro does), they play video games whenever they can (Kakyoin always wins), and they have the dumbest inside jokes that makes Joseph and Avdol groan every single time.

-They grow so very close Jotaro starts to believe that maybe this is what love is. The warmth he feels for Noriaki, a warmth that he only ever felt for family, must be love. It has to be right?

-And so the young man indulges in fantasies. Fantasies in which they never kiss, they’re just…together. Kakyoin smiles and he loves him, and Jotaro loves him back and he’s not alone anymore.

-He would never, ever, make the first move; too scared to break their bond. Plus, it’s not like he wants more than they already have.

-Jotaro would just like to be held sometimes. Maybe have his hair played with. He’d like to fall asleep and wake up in Noriaki’s embrace, and give him a peck on the forehead. He’d like his friend to tease him about taking up all the space in bed. And friend’s can’t do that, right?

-Overall he’s just lost and very confused. Also very very awkward about touch. This man craves a hug good good-

Jotakak pair HCS:

-Their confession was messy. It all happened so fast and it wasn’t how either of them imagined to be, planned it to be. It wasn’t supposed to be like this.

“The three of them stood on the outer wall of Dio’s fortress, the setting sun casting the building in dark shadow. Soon, it will all be over. With Avdol and Iggy left to die in the manor and Polnareff having run to chase the vampire himself, the plan Jotaro came up with was more than hasty.

As they settled on him joining Polnareff and Kakyoin tagging along with Joseph to catch Dio from behind, they could all feel that none of them would come out of this the same as before. If they even could survive this.

The thought plagued Noriaki. Not knowing if he would live to see another day, he had tried this morning to finally confess to his friend but his tongue betrayed him. This was his last opportunity. If he should die, he would knowing that he had been true to his love for the man.

“A moment.” He asked Joseph, not waiting for an answer to turn on his heel and rush towards Jotaro, grabbing him by the hem of his sleeve.

“Jotaro”, he said in a breath” There is something that you must know, before we part”.

The younger Joestar turned around meeting the other man eye to eye, mouth agape, as if he was about to say something.

“I’m in love with you.”

For a moment, nothing was said. Jotaro kept opening and closing his mouth looking for a word, any word, anything better than this crushing silence. He had to say something, he couldn’t stay silent while Noriaki was here and he loved him and he looked so, so terribly sad-

“It’s ok, said the redhead ”You don’t have to say anything. I understand that it’s- it’s a lot.” He gulped “See you there Jotaro”.

And with that, Kakyoin jumped off the building to join Joseph, leaving Jotaro on the roof, still fumbling for his words. His meager “Wait” was lost in the wind before it could reach Kakyoin’s ears.

They truly met again months later, when Kakyoin opened his eyes for the first time after surviving grueling surgeries.

To Jotaro, that time when Noriaki briefly looked at him in a daze while he held his hand as he was rushing him towards the Speedwagon foundation’s helicopter, holding half of his guts in his hands, didn’t count as meeting again.

The second the teen learnt that his best friend was awake, he was out of his hospital bed and running through the corridors, a trail of nurses behind him and IV still half-stabbed in his arm. Bursting into the room, he almost collapsed at Kakyoin’s side, muttering excuses and “I love you”s over and over. The redhead only offered him a half-smile before closing his eyes again.

It would be two weeks before Jotaro could gaze in these emerald eyes again.”

-Once Kakyoin started getting better and Jotaro was no longer banned from his room (after trying to break in multiple times), the two would not leave each others’ side. More precisely, Jotaro would guard his lover’s bed with his life while the other teen faded in and out of consciousness.

-They never talked about their relationship while in the hospital. Such topic felt too.. sacred, to be tackled in a hospital room. But they allowed the change to happen, bit by bit.

-They always touched each other, in one way or another. A hand on a hand. A leg brushing against an arm. They were each other’s lifeline, their mutual contact grounding them in the moment and keeping the memories at bay.

-After Kakyoin was transferred to a clinic to fully heal, Jotaro had the habit of sneaking trinkets, food and books in his room; both enjoying the malicious pleasure of driving nurses and the redhead’s parents crazy.

-When Noriaki was finally released from the clinic, the two could finally fully find each other again. Obviously their activities were limited, with Kakyoin now permanently disabled and with fragile brand new organs, but they made it work. It’s not like they both enjoyed hiking or public dates anyways.

-The topic of their relationship was still difficult to branch, especially to Jotaro. They never went further than holding hands and hugging, but the Joestar could tell that the other teen wanted more than that. And he wasn’t sure that he could be the one to give him what he deserved anymore.

-To be honest, Jotaro is absolutely crushed with guilt after Egypt. Even though his partner survived, the nightmares plague him every night, and he can’t look at Kakyoin without feeling as if his heart was being stopped all over again.

-To him, his friend deserves more than this. More than whatever he can give. Because, well, Jotaro might love Kakyoin, but he isn’t in love with him. He’s never been in love with anyone, and really, he’s not sure he’s able to.

-Slowly, Jotaro begins to distance himself from his partner. He calls less. He comes over less. And it crushes them both, because Jotaro wants to give Noriaki the world and Noriaki only wants Jotaro to be with him.

-It gets ugly. It gets bad. Because Kakyoin bottles up all of his emotions and Jotaro thinks this is what is best.

-Finally, what had to happen happened. They fought. And they broke down.

-Noriaki screamed until his voice went raw that he only wanted Jotaro to stay, that after Egypt, he thought that they would fight the entire world together if they had to but they would be together. He screams that he feels lonely, he feels abandoned, he feels as if he’s 10 again because he’s betrayed by the one he loves and it hurts so much. He screams that he knows he’s broken, that he’s crippled and useless but that he thought that they would get over this as a couple; he screams that he loves Jotaro but he knows he doesn’t love him back and he justs wants to be done, he just wants everything to be over because if there isn’t Jotaro that what even is left for him? And he screams and he screams because he just wants Jotaro to fucking SAY SOMETHING and LOOK AT HIM-

-And Jotaro takes it in. He takes the punches, he takes the tears and the screams and the harsh words.

-And Jotaro crumbles.

-Because he’s just so, so guilty. He just wants what’s best for the most important person in his life and he fucked up. Again.

-He falls on his knees and he cries. And Kakyoin just looks at him from his wheelchair and says nothing, eyes red and throat raw.

-Jotaro cries and says that he’s sorry. That he loves him so much but that he can’t love him, that he tries so hard but he can’t give Noriaki what he needs and that he deserves better than a broken man.

-Once the dam is opened, there’s no closing it. And the words flow out of Jotaro’s mouth and he can’t stop them.

-He tells his lover everything he never said before. How he always felt different. How he’s never been in love, how he’s never been interested in sex, how he thought what he felt for Kakyoin was love because it was the only justification for such an intense feeling. How he never wants to leave his side, how he wants to be his but he can’t and-

-Kakyoin bends down from his wheelchair and hugs him.

-He’s not sorry, he said. About what he said. About being mad, because he’s still absolutely furious at Jotaro for doing what he did. But he understands and never in a million years would he throw what they have away because the other teen doesn’t, can’t return his feelings. He loves him, and even if they wont’ be able to be a typical couple, they can still make things work.

“Jotaro looked at Kakyoin with teary eyes, trying to still the shaking in his shoulders and the tremors of his voice. His knees rasped against the hard wooden floor and hurt from the fall, but it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered except Noriaki, who looked at him with understanding and with so much love it made him feel like he could conquer the world.

“Do you- do you still want me then?” he choked out in a hesitant, low voice.

“Always”.”

-After things calmed down, they had a serious talk about what they felt for each other and what they wanted. It was as clumsy as two teenagers could get, but in the end they both got their point across.

-So much changed after that. It felt as if both of them been freed from an immense weight and could be themselves again, all of their barriers having been torn down. The two were even more comfortable around the other, although they both retained their natural level of awkwardness.

-Today, you could call their relationship a QPR (queerplatonic relationship). Back then, not having words to put on their relationship, they just called it a partnership of some sorts.

-Expect a loooot of casual touching and hugs from now on. These two seem superglued to the other everywhere they go.

-Jotaro being draped over a drowsy Kakyoin on the couch was a common sight at the Joestar estate.

-Acts of service. So. Many. Acts. Of. Service. It’s almost a competition at this point. Basically “Let me get it for you” “No let ME get it for you”.

-The sentient stands make it ten times worse. You WILL have Star Platinum floating away to get tea and Hierophant Green unwinding itself to fetch a book. Holly learnt to ignore the floating objects for her own sanity.

-Would kill for one another (I mean they already did so-). If anyone dares give any shit to Noriaki about his disability they're going to get a taste of Star Platinum's fist. If Hierophant didn't beat him to it anyways.

-Works both ways btw. When they go back to high school, Jotaro's fangirls try to swarm him again but you bet Kakyoin is burning them down with a stare and getting the both of them away as fast as his wheelchair allows him to. If looks could kill...

-They’re so stupid together. Insane chaos energy. Kakyoin literally has the worst sense of humor and is absolutely THRIVING with Jotaro, king of practical jokes. No one is safe except Holly. Especially not Polnareff.

-Kakyoin basically lives at the Joestar estate now. He wants to get away from his parents whom he has a tense relationship with still, and with the rate at which he comes over he always has clothes and trinkets littering Jotaro’s room.

-Even though Holly always offers a guest room, they bunk together. Absolutely no exceptions.

(Jotaro finally got his head scratches and hugs thank god)

-They talk endlessly. They tell each other everything, from their deepest and darkest worries to the colour of their socks. Jotaro opens up on his resentment towards his absent father while Kakyoin tries to share how his relationship with his family became so difficult, and how having a stand whilst being queer made him feel like he was alone against the world.

-Whenever Kakyoin sleeps over, the both of them tend to sleep better. Less nightmares.

-And when one of them jolts awake, a scream dying in their throat, the sight of their loved one laying peacefully next to them always soothes their worries.

-When the nightmares get too intense and the other wakes up, they will gently coax their partner through it, holding them in their arms and murmuring sweet nothings in their ear as tears flow freely.

-Kakyoin is a very guarded man, but Jotaro is the only one he feels safe enough with to express his emotions and his fears. Even then, him breaking down after a nightmare is a very rare occurrence. He prefers to keep to himself and hide away weaknesses like this. Suffice to say, when it does happen, it’s not easy on the both of them.

-Jotaro has the most nightmares. In the first year after Egypt, getting a good night of sleep was almost impossible for the teen. In the darkness behind his eyelids, he would always see the glimmer of red eyes and sharp teeth, and blood, oh god so much blood-

-Having Noriaki around helped. His partner was the one to drag his sorry ass to bed most of the times anyways.

-They help each other with homework as a form of bonding. Kakyoin is more into mathematics and literature than biology and physical science, so they cancel each other out. The only subject both of them are absolutely helpless at is…Japanese….

-They both think all of the literary rules are stupid for different reasons, but they agree on that.

-They don’t voice their affection for each other a lot, both of them preferring actions to words. But they do say “I love you” from time to time as reassurance.

-Jotaro helps Noriaki with his physical therapy and such. It keeps the redhead going, even when hi muscles are sore and his legs feel like puddy. He wants to walk next to his partner again.

-The taller teen somehow becomes Kakyoin’s doctor's best frienemy. Best friend because he always keeps him on his medication and pushes him through his exercises; worst enemy because he has the tendency to arbitrarily kidnap his friend out of checkups.

-When Noriaki was being difficult, Jotaro always knew how to rile him up:

“Come on Kakyoin, you just need to try and stretch your legs and we’ll be done for today”, said a nurse in a sweet but harsh tone. She had been trying to make her patient stretch after his session for a good twenty minutes and she was getting nothing out of him. Even with the patience of a saint, she was itching to give the teen a piece of her mind.

“Hm. Cmon’ Nori, let’s go home. I can see you don’t have it in you.

-EXCUSE ME?!,” spit the younger teen, a newfound fire in his eyes, “Shut up and fucking watch me Kujo”.

-Mutual infodumping. Their relationship is literally autism x autism. WILL take turns talking about their special interests.

-Jotaro would take Noriaki to the oceanographic museum while the redhead shows his partner around the observatory and planetarium. (Kakyoin is a space nerd to me sorry I’m projecting-)

-When they get older and the topic of college gets broached, Kakyoin is the one to push Jotaro to study abroad. And well, if he just happens to secure a full scholarship at Florida University’s department of Astronomy, a famous real-estate millionaire says it’s just a coincidence.

-They live together at university. Contrary to popular belief, Jotaro is the organized one. Kakyoin leaves a mess everywhere he goes. His mugs are literally everywhere (and he’ll be damned if he picks them up himself).

-They both take up work at the SPW Foundation, Kakyoin being confined to the support lines due to his injuries. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t try to sneak out and assist Jotaro on terrain or anything.

-In the end, both obtain their PHD with flying colors. Jotaro becomes a renewed marine biologist while Kakyoin devotes himself to research and teaching.

-The other crusaders learn of their relationship pretty quickly. Muhammad is very understanding, being demiromantic himself; while Polnareff and Joseph struggle a bit more with the concept. They're both trying really hard though.

"So, uh, when's the wedding guys?, said Polnareff in a joking manner

-There won't be a wedding you absolute waste of a bowel movement-"

-After many years at each other’s side, they relationship is the strongest it’s been. And even though it’s not your typical love story, they both wouldn’t have it any other way.

-And well, if they do decide to expand their little family…time will tell.

I mean seriously can you imagine the chaos? Raising a kid with your bestie? Everyone should brace themselves because little Jolyne and daddy Nori are about to be their worst nightmare.

[lemonofthevalley]

there's no way sydidiah aren't arospec like. they're literally just like me and my partners

[starsnheroes]

Another reason to dislike Peter Parker. He's shirtless.

[bread--quest]

we all need to start appreciating peridot stevenuniverse more for what she did for us. it would be easier to say what she DIDN'T do honestly. she's autistic. she's silly. she's sad and little. she's an overworked i. t. guy. she's a saturday morning cartoon villain. she's aroace. she's gay. she yelled at her boss and immediately had a mental breakdown. she's both a victim of and perpetuates the oppressive society she was raised in. she has to unlearn her conceptions of other people's worth and her own worth so she stops hurting other people and hurting herself. she achieves this in part through robot fights. she's hyperfixated on a canadian soap opera. she draws shipping charts. she's nonbinary. she can never go home again. she doesn't want to go home again. she went from believing literally anything was a weapon that could be used to harm her to farming and making art and music with her best friend in a barn. she's like 3 feet tall. she has a twitter account where she talks in all caps constantly. she's green and her hair is a triangle literally what can't she do.

[snowyh2o]

No but I still find it incredibly funny that for every episode in which Valentino is a major feature, Alastor is just completely MIA.

Val is like an Alastor repellent. The shear threat of his presence is enough to keep Alastor away from an episode.

Alastor’s Aroace radar starts going off and he immediately makes himself scarce.

He probably sensed that episode 3 was gonna feature a bdsm scene and that’s why he went to the overlord meeting with the Egg Bois.

Vox is only alive rn because he’s not worth the effort for Alastor to hunt down and kill but also because he lives with Val and Alastor refuses to be in the same episode as him for any longer than necessary.

Alastor and the supernatural ability to nope the fuck out of any and all Situations.

[actuallyidontgiveadamn]

one thing I noticed after watching the pilot and the first three episodes back to back is how averse to touch Alastor has become

he literally couldn't stop touching people in the pilot. I guess it was to go with his intrusive and pushy personality and added one more reason to be put off by him

in the recent episodes he hasn't initiated contact once. he sits aside from others if he can help it, has conversations from sometimes ridiculous distances, dines alone, leans out if someone gets into his personal space. while talking he puts his arms behind his back or his staff between himself and the person he's speaking to. he went nuclear when his coat was touched

the most intrusive thing he does now is just leaning in, while still keeping distance. and there was that one time when he touched one of the egg bois with his staff.

the only moment he really touches someone is when he's trying to get Niffty off his back, but she was the one who started it and he was immediately trying to get rid of her

I wonder if the previous personal space violations were cut just because they were gross and inappropriate (but seriously he's a feared despicable demon, he could've had those as a treat) or this newly established distancing is to add to the character's mysteriousness or even might be some kind of foreshadowing. (and I hope it wasn't just done as a part of his aroace characterization, in my humble opinion that would be the lamest explanation and also a stereotype)

[doublyamusing]

Currently reading Loveless and Jason right now has me on edge. What do you mean he blushed. What's this business that's going on.

[doppel-dean-er]

My 11 y/o cousin forced me to watch Heart Stopper with her and I would boo every time anyone kissed (and then she would hit me with her shoe, but). at one point I said something like "kissing in public? yucky" and she immediately, without fucking hesitation, went "well you just think that because you're aromantic."

and I AM? I never came out to her, I never came out NOR do I PLAN to come out to anyone in my family about being aro she just knew??? am I really that clockable??????? (yes)

that being said, thank you, Alice Oseman, for telling my cousin and her little friends what aroaceness is, it's made my life so much easier

[mooncalf87]

Hazbin Hotel alive au hcs

Angel and Husk are married and Niffty is their adopted kid (she just kinda showed up at their door one day)

'

Alastor runs a club called "Revive the Radio" which is basically just a group of people who are bat shit crazy about how much they love the Radio

Vaggie and Charlie run a rehab facility for all ages and Angel will come over to read to the younger teen patients

Vaggie has a hyperfixation on Pokémon Go and wanders around aimlessly with her phone out infront of her

Angel convinced Husk to play Santa at a local mall around the holiday times (husk will never admit how much he enjoys it)

Angel and Husk met in their 20s when Angel was a stripper and Husk was the bartender at the same club

Alastor went to school with Lucifer and then met Charlie later in life and IMMEDIATELY told her all the embarrassing stories about her dad

Sir Pentious owns an orphanage named "Egg Boys Sanctuary"

Carmilla Carmine also went to school with Alastor and Al still refuses to believe that little wild party bitch now has children

Alastor will show up to Husk and Angels house on the middle of the night to ask for whiskey from a very pissed Husk

Niffty is obsessed with the Disney princesses

Lucifer owns a local park and you can find him yelling at locals when they give the ducks bread

Husk was in the army for a couple years before he got injured and discharged when he was 28 and then he went to work at the club for a complete change of scenery

After he got with Husk, Angel no longer wanted to be a porn star but he still loved being an actor, so he ended up being a voice over actor for animated shows

Vox and Alastor dated before Alastor came to terms with himself being Aroace, it was 30 years ago and Vox still has a burning hatred for Alastor because Al broke up with him (al finds it funny how much Vox hates him)

Lucifer makes ducks in his spare time (he's the mayor as his actual job) and takes them to Sir Pentious's orphanage to give to the kids

I'll make more if you guys want me to

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for "unknowingly" cheating on my girlfriend?

🤍🍇 so i recognize post

preface: yes i am, theres no excuse, i just want to hear more ppl's thought because different ppl in my life have very different opinions on this??? even though i think cheating is cut and dry?

earlier this year, i (20nb, tho i was 19 at the time) was in a purely monogamous relationship with my ex (19f). there were ups and downs, i had some issues that i really shouldve talked to her about, but overall it was the best experience. id never dated anybody before. she's the only person who ive ever loved in that way. i think shes the best person, funny, smart. i was really lucky to have her.

i have another friend, who i'll call H (21f), who has been my friend for years. we're really close, and we've shared a lot with each other. i also love her deeply, though in a different, entirely platonic way. she has told me that she loves me, and has loved me in romantic ways, even though i've never reciprocated (im fine with that, everyone in my main friend group is a little bit polyamorous).

there were two main incidents that happened between me and H. the first, i didnt really understand what was going on or that it was entirely wrong. we were cuddling, which i do with all of my friends, and she started getting really into it and getting on top of me. she asked if she could kiss me (on the lips) and i said no, partly because, well, i had a monogamous partner, and partly because i hate kissing on the lips. i probably shouldve entirely cut it off at that moment. my only excuse (which is pretty flimsy) is that, im kinda aroace so physical affection and the difference between platonic and romantic have always left me a little confused. i kinda thought this was normal, especially because H is polyamorous and in several relationships that heavily blur the lines between platonic and romantic.

then, about two weeks after that, H and i hung out again, but this time we were smoking marijuana. weed makes me highly suggestible and also incapable of remembering anything past about five seconds. not that im blaming the drugs, just describing the situation. basically, H and i were cuddling again when she decided to move on top of me and got flirty, with a lot of touching sensitive places for the purpose of getting a reaction (all above the belt). i went along with this because i respect H, ive known her for a long time, and i didnt want to say no to her. again, not an excuse, because she didnt force me to do it.

in the moment, i didnt think this was cheating. we werent doing anything explicitly sexual, we weren't making out, but we were definitely frisky and i know H was horny at the time. a couple hours later, when i sobered up, i suddenly realized what we had done and asked H if i had just cheated on my girlfriend. she also seemed to realize what had just happened and we agreed that i had cheated, that it was entirely wrong, and we should never do it again.

i decided to tell my ex about this immediately, because i thought she should know. i asked if she was in a position to hear bad news, and when she was, i was completely honest. she obviously didnt take it well, mentioning how she felt like she could never trust me again despite being the person she trusted most in the world. she loved me but this was unacceptable and a huge violation. i agreed, and after a bit of thinking, i told her that i thought we should break up. i had terrible guilt about what i'd done and assumed that we'd never recover, and it didnt seem like she could pull the plug, so i did.

she proceeded to get even more mad at me because of this, which in hindsight is completely understandable. from her perspective, i had just dropped two emotional bombs on her, and maybe i was implying that i liked H more than her. i wasnt, and i dont, but i know why it came across that way.

my other friends agreed with me that i shouldve broken up with her after that. in hindsight, i dont know if it was the right choice. i miss her dearly and wish i had worked more on the relationship.

we've since talked about it. i told her that i still loved her (bc i do, very deeply, and i dont know if i'll ever get over her) but said that i dont expect anything, dont expect a relationship, etc. she was okay with this because, in her words, she trusts me to not make it a big deal or awkward. we hang out frequently now, we watch anime together, and we get along well as friends. i feel so lucky that she is willing to spend time with me, that she still enjoys my company even a little bit.

the confusing part is that i told my dad about this and he basically said, "you were 19yo in a long distance, online-only relationship. this was inevitable and you shouldnt feel too bad about it. it was wrong but not the worst thing ever." i dont really agree with that, because it was a pretty serious relationship despite being online. we even met up at a convention and spent several nights together in a hotel. it was the happiest weekend of my life. i thought i could marry her maybe someday. and i dont think being 19yo justifies it. 13yo maybe, but i was old enough to know right from wrong, even if my knowledge about romantic and sexual relationships was underdeveloped.

basically, im looking for nuanced opinions. i fully expect the results to be YTA. im hoping ppl can give me any sort of insight in the comments.

PS: H is partially to blame bc she knew i was in a monogamous relationship but please dont hate on her too much in the comments, we've had a lot of talks about this and what happened drastically changed the way the both of us see relationships and each other. basically, she learned her lesson and she was never trying to be a bitch or a homewrecker. i know her well enough to know shes a good person at heart. she's also not on tumblr to see any of your comments. direct all of you criticism towards me, please.

What are these acronyms?

[bishopsbeloved]

the art of falling in love (part four)

natasha romanoff x fem reader

best friend!yelena belova, aroace!yelena belova, internalised homophobia, found family trope, coming of age, angst, fluff (eventual happy ending)

part one | part two | part three | part four (4k words) | part five | epilogue

read this fic on ao3!

Natalia Romanova has lived her whole life in maybes.

When she was five years old and first banished to an orphanage in a far vast snowy corner of Russia, she thought to herself, okay. Maybe this will be the place that I find my forever family. Surely no place can be worse than that which I have come from. But the other girls she lived with were taller and crueler, and almost a year passed before a certain scraggly blonde rascal stumbled into sharing a room with her. Without hesitation she began causing havoc for every single resident. Natalia liked her immediately. It was not long before the two would share a bed at night and call one another sister.

Maybe I was right, Natalia would think to herself sleepily, as she and tiny Yelena huddled together beneath a duvet to survive the cold winter nights. Maybe this is my forever family.

It only took one day for that to fall apart for her, though. It hadn’t even occurred to her that someone might adopt Yelena without her too, or vice versa. And when that happened, and Yelena was torn away, she was at a loss.

“Не волнуйся,” Yelena reassured her as she sped around their tiny bedroom, gathering her many trinkets and treasures into a bag. “It’s okay. My mama and papa, they are very lovely, they promise they will come back for you. We will be a family together, in America. A new start. Together.” She held out a pinky earnestly.

“Together,” Natalia repeated, sealing the deal.

But two years after Yelena’s departure, she began to wonder if maybe her sister had been wrong.

She still can’t remember much of the day that they finally, finally came back for her. She was eight, and you and Yelena were both seven. Of course, she didn’t know you even existed at first — not until the long journey back, gazing down at the motherland below them as they left it behind, when Yelena babbled endlessly about her new best friend she’d made in Ohio. She doesn’t remember much of that, either — the whole day felt too perfect to be real. It’s all a blur. But still to this day, proudly framed by Alexi and hung above the fireplace, are the photos he took the day she came home.

Only a week into her life in Ohio did she ask her mother if she could change her name. Natalia Romanova was too difficult for Americans to pronounce, and it didn’t feel American. It felt as though it were just another of countless things that screamed I don’t belong. Maybe it would help her feel more acclimated to her new home. And when she worded it like that, who was Melina to deny her? So Natalia Romanova became Natasha Romanoff. You barely even batted an eyelid when the news reached you, and she’d often catch herself smiling when you went out of your way to use her full name in any situation you could.

Although it feels as though she’s loved you forever, it’s true that she was wary of you at first. That fateful moment she first met you, you came tearing into her new home to spend time with her sister and she was scared you’d take her away — but you didn’t. You shared her. And as time went on you began to share parts of yourself with Nat, too.

She’ll remember the day you won her over until her dying breath. December 3 — almost six months since she first moved to Ohio, and her first birthday there. You’d stayed over the night before, as you often did even then, and in the morning you approached her with wide adoring eyes and something clasped carefully in your hands.

“Natasha,” you began, with a slight tremor in your voice, “um, it is your birthday, obviously,” you glanced over at the gaudy banners Alexi had strung proudly around the house in declaration of this fact, “and, uhm, I know we haven’t known each other super long, or anything, but, yeah,” you finished lamely, and held out your hands to her, opening them up. “I found this super cool rock. Alexi helped me clean it. It’s pink.”

It was super cool, Natasha decided. Pink had become her favourite colour as of late — ever since she’d learnt that in America it’s for girls. She looked from the sparkly rock to your earnest, hopeful face and back again, and decided then and there that she loved you. (And maybe you even loved her back.)

The nature of said love did not make itself known to her for a good few years; even before it did, she made her best efforts to dismiss it, though. She very quickly learnt just how American girls were supposed to be — which did not include bright blue hair, or a desire to kiss other girls. Within just a few days of starting public school Natasha had bleached the dye from her hair, quashed down any potential interest in Daphne from Scooby Doo, and at night would carefully practise the American way of pronouncing words in the mirror — without her gentle Russian tinge. She tacked up posters of male pop stars in her room, and began to strategically pick which boys in her class she’d be crushing on next. Maybe, just maybe, if she kept all of this up then she’d be able to fit into her surroundings the way she was somehow never able to in the orphanage.

And for the most part, she did. She found herself becoming one of the most popular girls in class. She’d discovered that actually she was very good at fitting in, as long as she paid enough attention to everyone else. And she felt good about herself — as long as she didn’t pay attention to you and Yelena, who were entirely unbothered by the social norms she adhered so much to, and seemed a whole lot better off for it. It was entirely uncool to be so close with your sister. Her annoying little sister, and her quiet lovely best friend. Yes, as long as she avoided the two of you wherever she could, she’d be fine.

That’s how the years passed, for a long time. Natasha eventually outgrew her desire to distance herself from Yelena, and she returned to the protective tendencies she had harboured for the blonde when they were so young and alone, but what she didn’t outgrow was her need to fit in. That followed her way into high school. By sophomore year she was cheer captain and everyone in school knew her name. (She wasn’t mean, though, she always made sure of that. And she made it known that if anyone were to mess with Yelena — or you, by extension, as by this point people had started referring to you as the twins — there would be consequences.) She had friends, she had boyfriends, she had invites to parties. And as long as Natasha pretended she didn’t have a massive interest in you or a mental list of your likes and dislikes, she would be fine. Probably.

When she was sixteen she realised with startling clarity that the massive interest she acted as though she didn’t have in you was love. She and two of her good friends, Sharon and Maria, were animatedly discussing whether Sharon really loved her boyfriend or not. And the way love was described, romantic love, was identical to what she felt for you (and what any idiot could tell you felt for her, as much as everyone seemed to have agreed to pretend that you didn’t). An inexplicable attraction drawing her to you, an interest in anything you were interested in (see that time she was ten and stayed up all night researching your favourite cartoon just so she could discuss it with you over breakfast the next morning), a desire to just be with you forever. That was love. She loved you.

Oh, shit.

“You’re awful quiet, Nat,” Maria commented. Natasha cleared her throat and took a sip of juice. “Anything on your mind?”

“Just that Sharon needs to dump her shitbag of a boyfriend,” she replied shortly. Maria clapped her hands together in triumph, while Sharon let out a huff of annoyance.

“That’s what I keep saying,” Maria told her proudly, as Sharon spluttered in protest. The discussion resumed and the matter was forgotten. Natasha shoved her discovery to the back of her mind, hoping and praying she could un-discover it. Maybe if she did, things would stay okay.

Try as she might, she couldn’t, but she has tried; more determined than ever to be the perfect American girl. Over dinners she pretends to be annoyed at the teasing, saying that her accent’s gone, she’s no Russian, the American agenda has got her, that she’s almost as American as you.

“Our token Yankees,” Alexi often says merrily, to this day, clapping both you and her on the back with force that makes you wince and her giggle. She’ll whine and wrinkle her nose at him (while you just sit and blush), but secretly revel in the praise that her efforts have been so fruitful.

Barely any time into this school year, her senior year, she realised that she hadn’t had a boyfriend for a suspiciously long time.

“You and James would be cute,” offered Sharon, pointing with her fork at where her good friend and fellow Slav sat across the cafeteria, laughing about something.

“Yes,” came Natasha’s thoughtful reply, “we would, wouldn’t we?”

Every single aspect of her life was coldly calculated, unfeeling, sterile. Natasha Romanoff knew what she wanted and she would obtain it. Her pursuit of Bucky Barnes was no different. He was politely reciprocal at first, and the two entered what Nat’s friends called a situationship over the coming months. It wasn’t until a Stark house party that he turned her down.

“Natasha,” he said gently, and the word was so loud despite the music that blared only a few rooms away. He only had to say that and she knew. She sighed, and sat down on the bed in defeat, only to look up in surprise at his next words.

“I don’t… I like Steve.”

Not even Natasha could understand why she started crying. But Buck was so kind, so patient, and he held her until her tears dried. When she could speak evenly again she opened her mouth and everything came flooding out. The way she felt for you and her deep, innate fear of being different.

Bucky was quiet for a few moments in contemplation. Then he said, “I’m scared, too. Me and Steve are like you and Y/N, we known each other all our lives, and it’s like, what if whatever I do or say or feel ruins that? But you gotta… it’s…” He scratched at the back of his head. “You gotta trust it’ll work out. If you love each other proper, then even if she don’t like you back, you’ll still have her. In your life. It’ll be okay, you know. You just gotta have faith.”

Of course, Natasha knew without a shadow of a doubt how hopelessly head over heels you were for her. Rejection wasn’t what she feared. But she wasn’t sure how to word that to Bucky without sounding entirely conceited, so she just nodded. After that night, though, the two were a whole lot closer, and in no time at all they established a kind of beard situation — they’d act ambiguously involved in public so that in private they could affiliate with the ones their hearts truly desired. It wasn’t as though there weren’t queer people within their school, because of course there were, but both feared for the loss of their social standing so intensely that they saw no other option.

It was Bucky who pushed Nat to kiss you at the New Year’s party.

“If it goes wrong, come find me and we’ll drink,” he shouted over the blaring music. Both of them knew it wouldn’t go wrong, though.

But she drank anyway — for luck, she told herself, downing an impressive amount in one. She was Russian, even when she pretended she was not. A perk of that was being able to handle her liquor.

The New Year’s kiss famously went swimmingly, and Nat felt so giddy the next morning that she marvelled she hadn’t done this sooner. The two of you began to sneak around, which pleased her greatly, but she felt the words you didn’t say during the silence that would sometimes descend on the two of you. Your slight twitchiness, the way you would work yourself up to say something only to dismiss it at the last second. You didn’t want to ask what are we? for fear of the probable answer — and Natasha didn’t have an answer for you, anyway. She liked the way things were now; she had a pretty girl wrapped around her finger who she could sneak around with in private, and she could simultaneously maintain the social status she’d always had in public. She was certain that if you were ever to make her pick between the two she would spiral. Eventually you seemed to take the hint, and the hopeful silences stopped.

It never really occurred to her that she wasn’t treating you well until quite a few months into your relationship — around June, after Stark’s spring break party, once Yelena had started teasing you about a mystery girl. Every time it was mentioned in front of her she would tense, but you handled it with surprising and admirable nonchalance, and her sister seemed to have no suspicion it was her that was spoken of.

Natasha came back late one night from a hangout with friends. She’d forgotten her key and, assuming everyone was asleep, decided to let herself in through the garage rather than disturb anyone. But you and Yelena were still up and enjoying a quiet night in, as the two of you often did, huddled together under blankets on the sofa in a way that would make Natasha reminisce on the way she and Yelena used to do that in the orphanage — except they had done that to survive the bitter cold, whilst the two of you did so merely to enjoy reality TV reruns. It warmed Natasha to see her baby sister happy, at least.

The noise of one Kardashian fighting another (Natasha always got them mixed up) drowned out her quiet arrival, and the two of you were mid-conversation. She made for the stairs, not really wanting nor caring to intrude, but froze as she tuned into Yelena’s next words.

“You never really mention your mystery girl anymore, anyway,” the blonde was saying. “Did something happen? I can hurt someone.”

Natasha craned her neck to catch your next words.

“Nothing happened,” you said quietly. Defeatedly. “I just… I don’t know. I don’t think she likes me as much as I like her.”

“Ah, конечно нет, impossible,” drawled Yelena. “You are adorable, утенок. Everyone likes you.”

You murmured something unintelligible, and Yelena scoffed, but Natasha didn’t need to hear any more. She crawled up the stairs as if the world were about to slip away from beneath her feet. Suddenly everything around her was so overwhelmingly real, and she realised with sickening clarity that you were real, too. She spent the rest of that night lying in her bed, unsleeping, unmoving, counting the paint strokes on the ceiling and wondering if she could’ve gone her whole life without knowing that she’s a bad person. Maybe she has. 

That was probably the beginning of the end. When she looked you the next morning it was as though she was seeing you for the first time — you were quiet, you were pale, there were dark circles under your eyes. You were smaller somehow, as though something had defeated you completely. And Nat knew in that moment that she was too much of a coward to give herself to you, so the kindest thing she could do was let you go. If she was lucky then maybe, just maybe, she wouldn’t lose you completely if she set you free now.

Right now it’s prom night. Seeing you dancing with Sam was one of the most gut-wrenching sights she’s ever endured, but he at least seems to make you happier than she ever did. It didn’t make her very happy to look at, though, so she convinced Buck to drop her home on his way back to Steve’s. (Prom was their first official date and, as Buck informed her with a proud grin as she left the car, it went fantastic.) Melina and Alexi are out — every other Friday is their date night, and while Yelena groans and gags at how ridiculously in love their parents are, Natasha just finds it sweet and hopes she’ll have something like that someday. But you’re the closest it’s ever come to that for her, and she’s fucked that one. Royally.

“Hi, Liho,” she opens the front door and mumbles to the cat, who is sat in the hall expectantly. His haunches rise defensively, and Nat just sighs. He is very much your cat, not hers, and in recent times he seems to have been picking up on the turmoil she’s been putting you through. “Look, man, she’s out being happy, without me. Isn’t that enough?”

Liho hisses, and stalks with his head held high out of the front door.

“Yeah, whatever, leave then,” Nat grumbles, and kicks the door shut behind him. Even through the thick oakwood she can hear the noises of annoyance he makes back at her.

She kicks off her heels and throws herself onto the sofa, and lays there for a long time. It would be nice, she thinks to herself, if she could just stay here forever, and never have to face the world again. And she does for a while, but eventually the front door slams, bringing in cold air and with it the announcement that you and Yelena are home. Nat tenses as she recognises the sounds of your crying, and leaps to her feet, sliding across the smooth wooden floors in her stockinged feet towards you.

“What’s going on?” she pants, taking in the scene. You’re cradling something dark and vaguely furry to your chest, and Yelena is fussing over it worriedly. She realises like a punch to the gut that it’s Liho you’re holding. “Holy shit, what —”

She freezes as she realises she’s the one who let him outside. Is he supposed to outside? She doesn’t know anything about this goddamn cat, he’s not hers. Shit. 

“Call Alexi,” you choke out. Natasha stands still frozen in shock, so Yelena lets out a mutter of “бесполезный” and charges towards the landline herself.

“Are you— okay?” Nat tries uncertainly. “What —”

“Piss off, Nat,” you cry. Ouch. Okay, she probably deserves that.

“Sorry,” she says quietly, and steps back from you. You stand in silence for a few moments until Yelena comes skidding back out into the hall.

“He’s nearly home anyway,” she pants. “He says don’t call the vet, not until Ma has looked him, we should just stop the bleeding. It was definitely a car, probably a hit and run so he said to check the doorbell camera thingy. What is their name?”

“That is the scientific term, yes,” Natasha nods, and you make a noise that’s both a laugh and a sob. “Um, I think Dad has the app on his iPad.” Not that he knows how to use it. He’s such a comedically giant man that seeing him trying to navigate the tiny device offers her a steady stream of entertainment. (“Глупый кусок жести. Делай как я говорю!”)

“On it,” Yelena nods, and sprints off to where she last saw the device.

“I’m sorry,” Nat offers again, once her sister’s out of earshot.

“Not now, Nat,” you sigh tiredly, and you sound so broken that she just wants to scoop you up and protect you from all the evil in the world. But she’s subjected you to that evil, whether she meant to or not, and now she has to deal with the consequences.

Yelena is gone and oddly quiet for a suspiciously long time.

“You okay?” you call, cupping the cat desperately to your chest as you pad off in search of her. Unsure of what else to do, Natasha follows you, hanging behind awkwardly and making sure to give you enough space.

Yelena is stood still as anything in the kitchen, staring at the iPad propped up on the counter, rewatching one clip over and over on the security camera app. Nat can’t tell what it’s of, at first, but the exact moment you realise you let out a squeak, and squeeze Liho even closer to your chest. Only a moment later does Natasha understand what it is.

It’s from quite a while ago — the timestamp says sometime late at night in March. In the clip Nat’s car pulls up onto the driveway, with her at the wheel and you in the passenger’s seat. Once the car stops, Nat leans over and she kisses you. And you kiss back. On camera.

Liho lets out a noise of pain at how tightly you’re gripping him to you. Yelena stares blankly at the screen as the video plays over and over again.

“Lena?” you ask quietly, and when the blonde turns round her eyes are glossy. “I don’t —”

The next thing Natasha knows is a sharp pain shooting through her nose, and she steps back in shock, because there’s no way Yelena’s just hit her.

“What the fuck,” Yelena says, and there’s that scratchy sound to her voice that’s only ever there when she’s trying not to cry. “The one person who is off limits and you just couldn’t help yourself, could you?”

“Lena,” you cry out in alarm as the blonde raises her fist again. “Don’t, it wasn’t — it was an accident —”

“Oh, what,” she’s rounding on you now, “so you just slipped and fell into my sister’s —”

“No,” you plead desperately, “it wasn’t like that.”

“You were the mystery girl all along,” Yelena shouts, and presses her lips together with her eyes screwed tightly shut. “All the time you were right there. You lied to me.” She raises her fist again, but Nat is prepared this time and catches it neatly in her own.

“Don’t,” she says evenly, but she isn’t prepared for the hatred that burns in the green eyes that meet hers.

“How many months were you sneaking around behind my back?” Yelena hisses. Nat still holds her wrist tightly, so she merely turns her head to address you next. “Ты - лжец, how long have you been using me for her?”

“I wasn’t,” you plead, and whatever is shouted after that is indiscernible. After a few moments of noise the front door opens again, and Melina and Alexi stumble in, with a sense of urgency about them.

“Oh goodness, what is all this shouting, girls?” Melina asks loudly, and at the sound of her raised voice you all instinctively fall quiet. “In fact, this is not important. Where is this poor cat?”

You hold out the bundle of bandages and fur to her, face shiny with tears, and she scoops him up gently. “Will he be okay?”

“I don’t know,” she says shortly. “I will get him to the vet. I’ll call you.” She kisses your forehead, then Yelena’s, then Natasha’s on the way out and the front door slams behind her.

Yelena turns on you again with no less venom than before.

“You,” she says, “are not my family. And neither are you,” she adds to Natasha. “Do not speak to me.” She storms out of the room, and you, Nat and Alexi watch her leave, stunned.

“Well,” says Alexi with a jovial chuckle, clapping his hands and rubbing them together, “she seems a little upset, да?”

[the-oracles-maw]

headcanons: miguel o'hara x aroace/aspec! SO

me, an aspec writer when there's no aroace/aspec Miguel x reader bc it's all either smut or angst:

from my previous comments I got on the first time I wrote this, people have pointed out that Miguel could very much be Demi, and I am all over that.

I mean look at the man, analyze the man. Behold: a man. He's juggling protecting multiple realities and commanding spider people from said realities. Finding a partner is probably the last thing on his mind.

Look, you know the man is sculpted to perfection. He reminds you of Michelangelo's masterpieces walking from their mantles.

That didn't necessarily mean you wanted to stick him inside of you or vice versa.

This? This doesn't make Miguel feel insecure in the slightest.

I headcanon that Miguel knows how good-looking he is. He's long grown numb to the stares from men and women alike.

You think this man's never seen a mirror before

Some bold sumbitches have probably even come up to hit on him directly.

He noticed quickly you don't look at him like many people look at him. He noticed how innuendoes towards you went completely over your head. He noticed you didn't quite understand the subtle outrage from some of the spiders when you called him a "complete dick" once.

He knew that outrage wasn't over that he was a figure of authority.

You humble the hell out of him. One of his favorite things about you is that he has to work for you. You're not swayed by his sex appeal.

He finds that that makes you interesting. Very interesting.

It also make him fee.l.. human? Like he's not a prime cut of meat to be chewed up and spit out.

He loves that most about you.

Of course, at first, you're none the wiser to this.

Like all eventual emotions that arise in every relationship, you begin to have your doubts.

Is Miguel even satisfied with you? Are you... depriving him because of your orientation?

Plus, there's so many beautiful men and women in Nueva York.

Miguel is quick to assure you that you're more than enough for him.

Of course, eventually, someone does say something, and goes too far.

You return to your shared apartment, that is conveniently adjacent to the Spider Society headquarters. Miguel immediately notices your shift in mood, as the usual pep in your step isn't there. Knowing that you'll talk when you're ready, he lets it go.

You both settle in for a little movie night on the sofa. Snuggled against your man, you hardly pay attention to the movie, and then begin acting strange.

Rubbing against him, running your hands up and down his pectorals, attempting to straddle in his lap-

Miguel immediately knew something wasn't right.

Of course, Miguel wasn't one to protest your affections, but he could tell you were forcing it. The touches, the kisses, they weren't all there.

"Hey, what do you think you're doing, mi chulo/chula? What's-hey, hey, no more of that okay?" He pauses to push your hands away from him- "What's all this about? What's wrong?"

"Don't look at me like that, I know something's wrong. I know you're putting on an act." He takes both of your hands in his, rubbing his thumb along your knuckles. "I know you, babe. I know when you walk different. I could tell something was wrong when you came home tonight."

"Well," you begin. "It's going to sound dumb," you're cut off by him. "It won't. It's bothering you." He leans over to place a kiss on your forehead. "Come on, baby. What's the matter? Is it me?"

"No! Not at all, actually, it's me."

Subtle outrage is scary. Miguel doesn't show it, but he's totally fuming over what your coworker had said to you. You were excited to introduce Miguel as your boyfriend.

"And you mean to tell me you and that... oh wow, supermodel haven't done it yet? Haven't you been together for, like what, two years?"

"That's pretty amazing. I don't know how I could ever stay in a sexless relationship, much less two years. I admire your self-control."

You weren't dumb. You caught that subtle jab. But couldn't help but wonder if they had a point. Miguel could have just about anyone he wanted. Why you? Why someone he could potentially never have sex with?

"Hey now, you listen to me, yeah?" Miguel withdraws his hands from yours and wraps your arms around you. "I, am, more than satisfied with you." "You," he emphasized his point by placing a finger on your chest. "Make me feel more than fulfilled. We don't have to have sex for me to love you as much as I do. We never had to. And still look at us."

He smiled down at you, "You think I'm gonna throw this beautiful thing we have between us away for a quick fuck? Be serious, mi amor."

You tighten your hug around your boyfriend, and suppressed giggles as he placed chaste little kisses on your collarbone. "We may get there, we may not. But none of that changes how I feel about you. How I love you. Got that?"

"Mn," you sighed. "I understand."

"Bien. Muy bien." Miguel placed a kiss on your forehead. "How's about we call it an early night, hm? Want me to carry you to bed?"