#and it happens almost every time with our disabled asses

[tittyinfinity]

my best friend and I, ages 28 and 33, tried to stay up until midnight (when I got paid) so we could both drink after a long, rough week, but we both ended up falling asleep while sitting up. which I think says something about our age compared to how we were a decade ago

[finalacts]

something i've been thinking about with pluto is how the core three--ai, oom, and may--all have prescribed "roles" in their tangled mess of a relationship and how that has made it incredibly difficult for each character to see themselves and each other as People outside of those roles. this is where i think their core miscommunication happens, because it's not that the characters don't talk, it's more that they are constantly talking at or past each other, not to.

aioon and oaboom are obvious--aioon's the dutiful older sister, selfless to the point of being self-sacrificial, and oaboom's the overshadowed younger sister, precious only because her "weakness"** requires more attention. for aioon, moving forward is going to look like figuring out how to be a good sister/granddaughter without giving up her sense of self, and learning that these two things are actually one and the same--as we've seen, every time she sacrifices her happiness for what she thinks others want from her, it actually comes back to bite her in the ass. for oaboom, it's unlearning the belief that she is a burden because of her illness and learning that her ability to be loved is innate and does/should not need to be externally validated. for them both, it's going to include forgiving themselves and each other for their parents' deaths and all of the childhood hurts that ensued.

may is a little trickier to figure out, and i think i've settled on hers being that her identity and worldview--her role, literally--is almost entirely defined by that first interaction (one that aioon doesn't even remember, mind you). not only is attaching your entire sense of self to someone else's love for you just unhealthy in general, i actually think she spends quite a significant portion of the series unable to see aioon in her entirety because of it (not to mention how it basically caused the mess that was her relationship with oom). to her, aioon is still that teenage girl who showed her she was worth fighting for and how to fight--she's her savior. may's attachment to aioon is all encompassing, and it is devastating. it's why may keeps making aioon promise to choose her over everything else, not realizing that aioon (as she is now) would never be able to deliver. it's why her manipulations (lovebombing aioon every time she tries to tell her the truth or leave) ultimately don't work--aioon is not driven by love the same way she is. for aioon, that first meeting is inconsequential. it's not her lifeforce the way it is may's.

given all of this and the breakup at the end of ep 11, i think the only way forward for may is to figure out who she is outside of aioon--specifically, outside of this need to be loved by aioon. who is may as a person, an attorney, a cousin, a friend, when she doesn't have aioon guiding her (physically or otherwise)? personally, it's the only way i can see their relationship balancing out: may needs to have other things driving her the way aioon is driven by her family and friends, or else they'll just end up back where they started--with aioon leaving and may devastated.

ideally, their reunion would look something like aioon, the writer, meets metavee, the attorney, rather than aioon, may's first love, (re)meets may, aioon's twin sister's ex. a core theme in pluto is how our fixation on the past makes us unable to move forward, and how we should learn from our mistakes but not be haunted and bogged down by them. what aioon and may need is a fresh start, a chance to build upon new foundation, and i hope the ep 11 >> ep 12 time jump gives them that.

**just a quick aside mostly for myself to say that oaboom being canonically chronically ill is very interesting to me!! and i will be letting the thoughts abt that and how disability in general plays out in pluto percolate some more

[emberdember]

After months of ghosting around the arcane fandom and reboot bombing my favorite fanfic authors, I was shocked to find that I gained a follower (marry me @sulkybender). This world-shattering experience sparked me into action and I have now decided I will finally contribute something to the fandom I’ve haunted for too long. 

So, as any sensible disabled fan would do, I am obviously going to make a much-too-long analysis post about our favorite disaster gay - Viktor. 

🚨DISCLAIMER🚨

⚠️I am speaking from the perspective of a disabled person who uses mobility aids and my personal experience, NOT as a health expert or professional. I have an autoimmune disorder which made me go from using a cane to a crutch and the possibility of a wheelchair. I’ve been thinking about making this post for a while, but please don't take offense or read too deep into it. Don’t like it, don't read it. ⚠️

ANYWAY

In the episode one intro, we meet our beautiful, crippled smart-ass, made of stone and holding a book upside down for some reason. We love to see it, Vik. When I tell you I almost had a heart attack when I saw a glimpse of a character with a cane, I mean it. I’ve never fully appreciated the importance of representation in media until I saw my boy V. Every time he showed up on screen, I was hooked on every word he said, every movement he made. Seeing a disabled character on screen, with lines? And important to the storyline?? I scrutinized his every movement to see if the artists weren’t going to screw this up. But my heart broke when I saw him using his cane on the wrong side. 

When you use a cane, you put it on the opposite side of your weaker leg. In Viktor’s case, he would use it on his left side, because his right leg is the one that is weaker. In his first appearance, he doesn't have a brace yet, but walks with a pronounced limp that hints to an injured leg. I sigh and keep watching, because counting my wins is more important than getting upset at tiny details. At least he has a cane. 

Fast forward to the timeskip between ep 3 and 4. Viktor is back, much to my excitement. I was expecting him to be a side character, the token cripple the writers use to get that representation gold star. But I was happily surprised by his return, and his role in HexTech. So you can imagine the excitement when I saw him using a crutch - on the CORRECT SIDE. It gave me such a serotonin boost I almost wanted to kiss Christian Linke on the mouth with tongue. (almost.) He also used a brace, showing that unfortunately his health was declining, but at least he was going about it correctly. Kind of. (Sorry, Sky.)

And, in episode 6, we get a flashback to Viktor as a little boy. Cute, but again, he used his cane wrong. It obviously is making him slower and doing more harm than good, which made sense given that doctors are scarce in Zaun and there was probably nobody there to teach him-

wait.

this made me pause. Of course he wouldn’t know how to use a cane correctly, how could he know? I exit the episode and go back to episode 2, where we first see Viktor. 

There he is, the king of sass himself. Using the cane incorrectly. But if you look closely as he turns, the cane wiggles. Stay calm people. Don’t freak out. I know its a small detail, blink-and-you’ll miss it moment, but hear me out. Nothing in animation is on accident. I would put a gif in here, but god hates me and my computer, so you’ll just have to take my word for it. Sorry.

I have experienced that god-forsaken cane wiggle more times than I can count. It happens when you put too much weight on it, and it affects your balance.

Did you catch that? Balance? What would Viktor know about balance? 

I’m running out of time here and I’m probably losing your interest. So let’s keep tugging along. 

long story short! I am forever indebted to Arcane artists and their attention to detail - as Viktor lives longer in Piltover and has access to health services, he learns how to take care of himself and use mobility aids correctly! An incredibly small detail that means absolutely nothing to the plot, but as I rewatch the show I feel immense gratitude to the artists and writers that thought about the little details, and by doing that they represent the educational journey that thousands of disabled people go through - including me. Like Viktor I had to learn the hard way what mobility aids to use and how to take care of my body, when nobody told me how. 

Am I projecting heavily on this poor man? Yes. Did you just waste time you could have spent doing something productive reading this? Absolutely. Am I insane? Probably.

thanks for reading you crazy person

[velvetvexations]

I understand the instinct behind it to a degree but it really does worry me how fast people in progressive spaces are willing to buy into conspiracy level thinking about there being shadowy groups of transphobes plotting to freeze other trans people out or like, that every big news story or movie/tv/book release is planned to distract us from Sudan or Gaza, cuz like quite often things are just coincidences? The most insidious thing about systemic oppression is that it's so self-sufficient it doesn't NEED people to conspire to fuck over xyz demographic, it just does that on it's own. The instant you buy in to conspiratorial thinking you're in danger, and that includes painting a large group of queer creators as active, intentional transmisognists who should be shunned forever and ignoring the realistic read which is that it's clearly an unfortunate coincidence that can be fixed! It's the whole "if the building was designed to be inaccessible even if everyone working there loves disabled people the building is still inaccessible" thing, for a lot of reasons not a lot of trans and queer people end up even in the line to possibly be front and center in a show or two, and Dropout is clearly working to change that and include queer people, but it's slow going and the system is stacked against trans people and no one is perfect and Dropout is also still a VERY small company all things considered trying to build themselves up from almost nothing, they need support so they can offer space to more trans people and transfems! Like what good does spreading a bullshit rumor about the main cast all being closet raging transmisognists do aside from tear down one of the only queer platforms we have??

When College Humor got bought by Sam they could only afford like ONE employee, do we want to have to wait years and years and years for another new platform to arise that has the money and power to represent us?? I'd rather uplift and push to be better a platform that is run by queer people who want to do better for all of us even if they don't always succeeded than sit here begging Disney to acknowledge that we exist while spreading horrid rumors about every legit queer creator who wants to platform us secretly being a huge bigot in disguise.

It's so awful, I hate how every time someone works their ass off to make a fucking difference for queer people all the terminally online progressive queers have to rip them to shreds for not being 100% perfect in every way until we have nothing but sanitized corporate overlords who don't think we deserve to be on screen at all. Every progressive queer creator gets put through this eventually and I'm so sick of it. The Vlogbrothers, The McElroy Family, Nightvale Presents, She-ra, Steven Universe, Chappell Roan, Becky Albertalli, it KEEPS happening!! And we will never get anywhere if the slightest misstep or honest unfortunate coincidence is enough to deem the only people who are trying to represent us, many of which ARE us, as irredeemable bigots who should be crucified in the town square.

Imo this is just a massive case of people always falling for conspiratorial thinking out of a refusal to actually understand how systemic bigotry works in favor of the "everyone is always secretly intentionally conspiring against us" lie and refusing to give queer creators/allies ANY grace or room for error or the benefit of the doubt because like. I guess destroying other queer people and our allies is what some of us do best. The fact that it's only ever queer people and allies who get this treatment makes me sick. We can't let ourselves have anything, it's perfect or it's evil. What the fuck is even the point of queer rep anymore if all of it is going to get treated like this eventually?

.

[littleapocalypsekitten]

*Looks in on the American Politics tag and asks self WHY?!" Okay, I am no political expert, but I'm middle-aged, have been politically-aware for American politics and have probably been casting my ballot for longer than half of tumblr has been alive. (I mea culpa for that time I voted for George W. Bush. It happened once and did NOT happen again). I was registered as an Independent until recently, left-leaning since 2004 or so... Yes, I am THAT old. I'd say I've been politically aware even since before 2000 since some of my favorite cartoons liked to make fun of politicians (I was really into Animaniacs and Pinky and the Brain and politics was the source of many gags, showing that they were not shows just for children). Urk, anyway, with the election so close and people talking about some very serious issues, I thought it high time to remind people of certain things, things I have observed in every election year. Politicians talk out of both sides of their asses. Party doesn't matter, it's a fact. They will say what they think they have to in order to fetch the most votes. Whether they actually keep their campaign promises when in power is up to them and up to a number of other factors, such as how many other people on their side are elected (as well as how many of them do turncoating). - (I honestly did not expect John Fetterman to become the asshole that he became when I voted for him, but I still suspect he's better than Dr. Oz). This can be good or bad. I suspect, for instance, that the signs pointing to Kamala Harris continuing "Genocide Joe's" policies might actually get reversed once she's done having to play pussyfoot with "yay Israel no matter what" voters who are for the Dems' other policies. I've seen signs that she doesn't entirely agree with everything that Biden is doing (and remember, she's just the VICE President, she doesn't make policy. Her job is twofold: Tiebreaking vote in the Senate if the Senate gets tied on something and "Be there if the President falls down dead." That's it). Policy is such that Bills are proposed in the House of Representatives, are pass / fail in the Senate and if passed, go to the President's desk to be signed into Law or not. Executive Orders are another thing, but I believe there is a sharp limit on them, because we do not have a Monarch. Granted, I think the likelyhood of Harris continuing on Biden's track of supporting an ally-nation with the materials of war when almost any other nation would be getting sanctions is strong, but I do think there's a chance that Harris is pussyfooting for votes and can be reasoned with on the "stop supporting genocide!" thing. Maybe. Hopefully. I also think that "we" have limited power over what other world leaders do, ultimately. Trump would send nukes. American Foreign Policy Always Sucks. That's just the whole of it. We are an empire. There is no moral purity in living in / being born in an empire. I don't have to agree with it, I was just born here and for a variety of reasons, can't get out. Anyone who has the "America is World Police / Superman of Nations / Supposed to be the "moral" nation" was probably taught an idealistic history (as my generation was). Kick American Exceptionalism to the curb! I am planning to vote. It is my personal decision and it's not because I am supporting our horrid foreign policy, it is because I really don't think there's much to be done about it since it's sucked AT LEAST since the Vietnam War and I am concerned with domestic policy primarily (I make no secret about being selfish, concerned about things such as my status as a disabled non-wealthy queerish woman, and with concerns about my family) and I really think as far as foreign policy - either way is going to suck, one guy is going to suck harder (and possibly turn the world into a radioactive wasteland through either evil or dementia - and not the fun kind, like Fallout).

[the-firebird69]

This little more too this morning is announcement about Charlotte County:

-it's true that leadership is changing hands but bja is losing people out of the Mac morlock Crew he makes up most of it now but he is losing people. Pseudo empire was at 1.9 million and they dropped to 1.7 million it's almost the same number every day that's very curious about 80% no it was 90% died from disease radiation sickness really and 10% evacuated and told the tale of what it's like here people don't like it coming up we have some news about our son and his status

--there are people who are trying to get to him to get him things that he needs that are not necessarily working all that great they've been on the fritz for years but they smell and having food that smells is not something nice so there are people that are trying to fix that for one reason or the other and they are trying to make a meeting and such and their obstructed by their own people and more it is a matter of time before it will happen but it is very very not nice so we see our son is looking at the room to do laundry in and it's not very nice it's an ugly room but that's what it is we have a couple more things to discuss but this is a positive if it's happening and it might be more than one after a short time and it won't mess up FEMA is there pretty much done sending money they said they might send a little more but he can't hold on for it just takes too long

--there are other things happening in this life that he's not aware of and there's a couple he is but mostly with money he's sitting there with nothing and doesn't think it will happen too much he wants it to but he's holding on because he knows we're getting ready for the Mac proper code which is what it is that will be issued with it it's going on now that he is willing and able to help us out and he is on top of it we are going to find the time to assist him with this but from the knowledge standpoint these payments will begin momentarily we think that it will be within a few days and he will start to get some funding from other sources and unexpected sources yes and answer and uncle or friend or former company all over the place and more but it is very damn slow and he needs to get stuff and then blocking stuff it's wise asses here and it's more than just Trump it's going on now and we're fighting it and we need more people to sign on

--he's going to be big but really only after the first week in May that's some time from now it's a ways from now we're understanding that and we're getting ready for that but in the meantime we're going to make sure that he's ready to do assignments and we have things for him to do as he's getting bigger they're important things we will begin a a series of items for him to do with regards to him becoming pig it's it's a huge amount of things okay it's very big what we're talking about so hold on to your socks everybody okay this is going to be massive and we need him to be able to do them and they're trying to disable him all the time and his bike and everything about his life and they're horrible finding them you'll figure out that it's extortion and they need to go that's another thing in the general populace they're shrinking

Thor Freya

Olympus

[f0xd13-blog]

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A post shared by Business | Entrepreneurship (@incomefact)

When you are the best boxer because you say shit like it is

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A post shared by Aqi Malik Writes (@aqi_malik_writes1)

Remember i actually tried peace y'all just never realized it.. i said i was different but still some of us are mixed.. that ain't their culture because things are similar or they have gypsy or egyptian influence doesn't even belong to half the latrashtinos there... but they were the ones continuing to want it all for themselves

. This is recorded here.

They are stupid enough to think that i wasn't doing that with a purpose which is to fluentemente pass a message from asia and africa to all of them

So two thinks

Our stars always dead

Randy used to hightlight jews and their page if full of natives or jews... totally trying to already replace us

Asia is reading

Jewish kids behaving black, gypsy and russian hip hopers with bloodline and stars

Two natives , 1 jewish that can never fix his hair and face, a wannabe me dull af

Want to see his ufc match? I just need to say that and the fact mcmahon never forgav him it was the jews of course. Also i don believe in people that dress witha native shirt like he did before when he is in fact atheist and from an ashkanazi fam

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We are even more united bitch no equality programs that end up with us ded

And no shade to messi i even feel bad for going for him coz i do think he isna nice guy but i'm waiting for him to mark a goal like this!

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A post shared by Романэ зделки🤝 (@romano_avito)

I will not do shit i oon'r need to do shit i'm just telling ya faith

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So that check person never killedd anyone, hanas don exist as hostages they aree running away coz that"s what you would do if someone framed you as tserrorists (there's no videos of hostages ahahb and those children from that video looking happy and safe as hell wasn't even hostages, people of gaza have been purposly left out of israel on purpose most of them have disabilities, israel only exists as a old ass kingdom long gone and most recently from a colonization from 75 years ago when the holocaust happened and hitler actually never diedd just moved to palestine which was a country since idk ancient rome for example it was like that for centuries, the holocaust victims wasn't the jews but almost half of europe that is why you havs shitloads of land destroyed to this day and poor people that don exist as much in israel unless you are arabic andd suffer from racism, ukraine was a base for concentration camps, russia fought directly with nazi germany so they know wtf they are talking about, almost all the world realized this, if you search for the holocaust fotos they ar dressed romany and arabic as in turkish Muslim etc, even cogi children are being explored and suffered a holocasut there done by the jews again and they aree more black than the rock, the entire world knows about this except the usa, y'all literally started this multiple times... and what else? You beat off people at every part of the world oh and portugal payed a debt that was never theirs to israel for the armory they have now to kill people.

Well the last part unfortunately he was wrong

We was on our own lane... after years and years of abuse, and you still came after us again and i ain't supposed to say this? They go rape congo citizens and then send their missionaries to guilt trip the men like if it was even dem!!

Wwe's entire issue with wut i had to say is a saulty comment about germany that was started by them and yah they are teammates because they've togetherly put me on lithium and killed my kind if you think that is a joke maybe you better reavaluate your priorities specially because the entire world is watching and you're gonna lose deals like that coz you don play with this sort of shit...want an holocaust in the usa and then i say it was the germans?

Ps. Lez also not forget germans like to com here and ask why we have specific color... they say wow i was expecting for lighter skinned people... yah that happens when they don point to your skin and ask why wee have this color since we are european.. being asian pale like me which is in fact different skintone of black person

They literally don know anything about this side of europe and then be stupid af...

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Japan might be dumb again because they hate russia but last time that happened they didn't end up well... and it wasn't the entire world againts them like this time around

[bluheaven-adw]

Hi ive seen your art while scrolling through the trollhunters tag and i really need to ask because this is kinda weirding me out...

Is your art a result of you drawing so closely to the show it looks like the 3d models or a bad edit of the 3d models..

Because for me it looks like both and i cant tell which one it is and it confuses me each time i see your art

🤔

Honestly, this has kind of thrown me for a loop and I'm still not sure how to take this? But I'm going to take it as a compliment. And, for those interested, y'all are getting a bit if history after the jump.

Short answer: It's the first one. I draw very close to the show. It's all my drawing. I love Jim's design and strive to get as close as possible to how he looks in the show. I'm a technical realist most of the time. I also have years and years of experience in a lot of different types of art and mediums. So for fun I thought I'd do a screen grab from my current WIP while I do a little bit of quick and dirty work. I've clicked through some of the various layers, sketch, lines, finished layers... and then my ugly process for all to see lol. I'm self taught in procreate.... I have no idea what I'm doing. Usually I'd spend way more time on things.... but that would be a long ass video. A lot of my current work takes weeks. The one of Blinky reading to sleeping Jim has over 65 hours in it, and the Masquerade Ball is close to 80.

Long answer!! All of my art is my own (with the exception of one borrowed art work, which was given credit), drawn by me from ugly concept sketch (that sometimes looks vaguely like our characters.... and sometimes just circles and triangles) to polished sketch, to final line work and then color and rendering. I'm self taught, but also have some fine art background... and some in CAD and graphics and when I first started college it was with the goal of automotive design, so I'm more of a technical artist than what most people are used to. I have a background in Copics and my color and blending from those bled over into Procreate. I have medication induced aphantasia, so a lot of times need references. I've been doing sketches of Jim every night for almost a year now. There's a few speed sketch vids on my instagram (same username). I do have photoshop, but the extent of my editing skills is photoshopping aftermarket wheels on my car to find ones I liked, and it's been an ungodly long time since I've done that. I mostly have it because, prior to disability, I spent a lot of time as a photographer shooting landscapes and such, and shooting In infrared.... but I haven't touched a camera or photoshop since...... 2017? I don't even remember how to use it for the most part. Photoshop is not like riding a bike.

Trollhunters and especially Jim, are my comfort show. Helped me through some bad times... and then RotT happened basically right when I had a major surgery, and the combo really messed me up. I started sketching Jim as a way to heal from both... and well, it was all downhill from there 😂

That's probably way more of an answer than you were looking for!

[celeste-clearwater-06]

Hello! I was wondering if you could please write something about how the Fellowship (+ Thorin?) Would help a s/o who's Disabled and Chronically ill. Like she has a lot of symptoms like chronic pain, chronic fatigue, difficulty sleeping, difficulty breathing at times, difficulty walking at times, higher sensitivity to the cold, difficulty talking at times, and anxiety, depression and executive dysfunction?

I've been really struggling with my chronic illnesses lately, namely my Autism, Anxiety, Sleep Apnea, a really bad Overbite, Raynaud's Syndrome, Asthma, etc, so I'd really appreciate an Imagine like this. I have a really weird disorder where one of my legs is longer than the other, and it's been causing me a lot of pain and difficulty walking lately, and people have been bullying me for it a lot too, so I could really use a Comfort Imagine right now. Thanks so much hun!!

It's no problem! I'm glad I can provide some comfort!! For each character, I'll use a specific struggling area, to make it a bit easier!! I hope I got these accurate enough, and of there are any mistakes, feel free to point them out!! You are strong, beautiful and so, so amazing!! Keep being you!! ❤❤

Help (The Fellowship// Thorin x Fem!Reader)

Aragorn (Autism)

Aragorn has known you for a long time, so helping with your autism is not new for him

He's particularly experienced in reading your emotions and meeting your needs, whether it's helping you out of stressful situations or calming you down, he's there 🥺

If there are large and boisterous gatherings in Rivendell, its almost guaranteed that you can become over-stimulated quickly, and Aragorn immediately senses this (spidey senses õoõ)

He's fast to find your hand and give it a gentle squeeze of reassurance

If that doesn't seem to help, he'll instantly stop what he's doing and take you out of the room

If you're someone who prefers lots of space and little physical contact, he is 100% respectful of this and asks if you'll let him touch or hug you (very much gentleman 😌)

If ever you're confronted by someone of importance, Aragorn is right by your side to ease some of the tension

Sometimes there are things you find difficult to say or get out of your system

The king seems to know exactly what it is and will help you out by saying it or asking you simple questions that you can easily answer

And he always reminds you, no matter WHAT

YOU ARE NOT STUPID 😤😡

You may struggle with some parts of your life, but every day, he's constantly telling you that you're very intelligent and kind

His patience is unending and he'll never let you think down on yourself

Overall, Aragorn is always someone and reminding you that it's all going to be okay ❤❤

Legolas (Anxiety)

Most nights, Legolas keeps watch (since elves don't require much sleep) and notices that you jolt awake out of the random

Now, most of the Fellowship notices that you're usually awake and ready to go before anyone else

But Legolas is really the one to address you first

You were a bit nervous to explain, since you didn't want to worry him or the great of the fellowship, amount the other disadvantages you have

He gently encouraged you, and finally, you explained to him your sleep apnea

Yeah, he was very concerned

I mean, his blue eyes widened with terror when you told him that you could basically die in your sleep if you weren't attentive enough 🙃

Legolas, from now on, sleeps directly next to you, or keeps extra careful watch over you at night

Because he could NEVER see his precious mortal friend become injured... Or worse 🥺🥺❤

The other members had noticed a change in his behaviors towards you as well...

Gimli teased him whenever he caught Legolas giving you some extra lembas bread or offered to carry you 👉👈

You really tried to assure Legolas that it wasn't a big deal when you were awake, since you're aware of your breathing situation

But still 😤

Legolas will always bring you comfort and take great care of you, and that will NEVER CHANGE

Because he loves you very much ❤🦋

Frodo (Anxiety)

Frodo is familiar with the feeling of great anxiety, seeing he had a stress-free life while living in the Shire and suddenly was forced to carry a piece of jewelry all the way to giant ass volcano

It's easy for you two to comfort each other and seek refuge in thoughts and feelings ❤

He's not super comfortable with the thought of you having a panic attack though...

Only because he's never had one

It starts to give him a panic attack whenever you have one around him the first time 😳-

Any time you begin to breathe heavy or hyperventilate, halfling boy is hot at your heels, rubbing your back and reminding you to breathe gently

(So many hugs, if you're up for it)

After you calm down, he's constantly checking on you, asking if you need anything etc.

Really, he just wants to know if he can help 🥺

And even with the weight and stress of carrying the ring, Frodo manages to cheer you up somehow

Samwise (Asthma)

Sam has never had to deal with asthma once in his life

He's very nervous when the subject is brought, afraid it might trigger something inside of you 🥺👉👈

But you just chuckle, assure him that it's alright, and you have ways of keeping it under control

And now, he wants to know everything about it, just to have the awareness in case something happens

Sam just wants to protect you forever, and this was a great way for him to start

He constantly reminds Aragorn that you'll need breathing breaks and will convince Gandalf to let you ride on his horse

He'll scold Pip and Merry if they are trying to drag you around and be silly, because as he says

"You'll rouse him/her/them up! We can't have Y/N gettin injured!" 🤨😠

Sam is MOM

As always, he's very kind and always makes sure your needs are met ❤🥺

Pippin and Merry (Raynaud's Syndrome)

Very confused halfings 🤔

Also extremely concerned!

You were eating one of the lesser pleasurable nights

It was cold and rainy, and a fire couldn't be started, not to mention the quiet arguments of Aragorn and Gandalf in the nearby woods

And Pip's eyes widened when he saw the tips of your petite fingers begin to pale upon hearing Aragorn mention Orcs

"What's wrong with your hands?!" He squeaked, pointing towards your now white-colored fingertips

You hadn't even noticed, nor felt, considering they were numb anyways

Merry looked over his cousin's shoulder and his eyes also widened, not with fright, but wonder

They were both fascinated with your condition, convinced that you were casting some spell Gandalf showed you

Although you reassured them it was just an extremely frustrating inconvenience that you had, among other things

So from then on, the disastrobus duo did their best to keep you out of the cold (and stressful situations!!)

As a distraction, the pair will tell you great stories of the shire, doing little dances and skits that always cheer you up 🥴

Sometimes, they can be a little rambunctious though...

Merry will pick up on this fact quickly, and nudge Pippin to get him to calm down

Even though it may not feel the best

They find your syndrome absolutely fascinating!! 🤔🤔

All in all, these two are always up for keeping your beautiful smile on your face and your spirits high!! ❤🌺

Boromir (Depression)

Throughout the journey, Boromir has always found an easy way to make you smile

After all, he himself has a fascinating way of brightening anyone's spirits

Yours included ❤

Boromir may not have great stories from The Shire, like Pip and Merry, but he sure has a lot of positive things to say

He'll often suggest sparring with the two troublemaking halflings, just so you can see him goof up and get knocked over 🥺

If the nights become cold and weary, he'll give you a warm hug or a nudge on the shoulder

And a few words of helpful encouragement along the lines of;

"Don't fret Y/N. You have more strength than you'll ever know."

"Let our spirits never dampen! We've come this far!" 😊

He's also an incredible listener

Boromir wants to hear what you have to say if you ever need to rant or get something off of your chest

And don't think for a second that he would ever judge you 😤

Son of Gondor sees past all of your insecurities and knows you for your beautiful, amazing self ❤❤

Gimli (Walking disadvantages)

As you travel across great plains and mountains, your limp doesn't go unnoticed by Gimli

It may take him a while to open up about it, since he's afraid he might offend you in some way

And once he asks you, you inform him that it's a difficulty that unfortunately cannot be changed any time soon

And where you come from, lots of people tease and bully you about it

He did NOT handle it well 😳

"wHAT BLUBBERING DULL-MINDED PIGNUTS-" 🤬

Although this Dwarf is short and a bit slow at times

He's fascinatingly strong 😳

And so, he makes it his duty to be your designated carrier 🥺

At first, your a tad skeptical...

I mean, he's only around 4 feet tall...

BUT HAVE YOU SEEN HIM THROW THAT HUGE AX AROUND?!

Gimli will happily carry you great distances when you need a break, and even longer

(Sometimes it's just to show off around the others-)

"Gimli, are you sure you don't want a break?"

"Aye lass! The strength of Dwarves is unending!" 😌

*struggling to breathe*

11/10, fantastic dwarf, will never let you down!!

Thorin (Executive Dysfunction)

Another Dwarf??

Absolutely

Thorin himself has trouble keeping composure with his time management (and sense of direction 🙄)

This means that he'll have an undying amount of patience for you and you only

There's just something about you that he fond of, and it fills in that little sassy, brooding place in his heart

Can also relate to you whenever you grow frustrated at the setback of your journey or lack of sleep

Is 100% willing to help you find your lost belongings (and once again, ONLY YOU)

Thorin will literally make the whole traveling party stop so that you can put something in your bag and make sure that you put it somewhere you'll remember

Always happy to give you extra gentle reminders of keeping your pack closed

The company is utterly SHOCKED with how he treats you

I mean, this man has always been extremely stubborn and hard headed

But when you show up, it's another person he can easily relate and share frustrations with

Also a master at organization?!? 🤔

The one thing he could do successfully was organizing the damn journey and traveling company, so ofc he's gonna be good at that 😂

Yeah, Thorin definitely has a soft spot for you

King under the mountain will never run out of patience and kindness for you 😌💙

Sorry these took so long!! I hope you like them!! ❤❤

[angryschnauzer]

Waited So Long

Summary: As an actress in her mid 20′s you had been lucky enough to get the roles you pushed yourself for, but one role in particular needs a scene you have no experience with; a sex scene, and you co-star is surprised to discover you are still a virgin even though you are in your mid 20′s. But he’s willing to help with whatever you need.

Trope: Friends to Lovers, Co-stars to Lovers Pairing: Henry Cavill x Female Reader

Warnings: NSFW, 18+, loss of virginity, oral sex, fingering, vaginal sex, protection/condoms. 

I no longer operate a tag list, but instead pop over and follow @angryschnauzerwrites​ and put that blog onto notifications. You’ll then get an alert each time i post a new story.

Masterlist got so long all the links broke, so you can now find all my previous stories on my AO3 LINK HERE

Waited So Long 

Henry sat at the large table, grinning and laughing as the rest of the cast had finished reading through the latest episode’s script. Everyone was in a good mood and that was down to the fact that tomorrow’s shooting schedule required just you and Henry, meaning that everyone else got a three day weekend. But… but you were just staring at the script. You knew it had been coming, but to see the words in front of you, the stage descriptions, it was overwhelming. 

 The Netflix special was ten episodes of a sci-fi series, and you played an alien warrior. Henry was the plucky human astronaut  that had been aboard the International Space Station when it had been sucked into a black hole and had ended up on the far side of the universe. Eight episodes into the filming schedule and the pivotal sex scene was about to be included, and that’s what was clouding every thought in your mind. 

 You were far from naive, you had no issue with your costume or even the nudity - you were after all painted purple with patches of ‘scales’ in strategic parts - but it was the fact you had a small secret that was making you so nervous; you hadn’t ever actually had sex. 

 You were already mid 20’s, you’d been through university and stage school, worked on broadway and the London west end, you’d modelled for artists and had always put your career first. Relationships had just fizzled away after the first couple of dates because of your acting schedule… and that is how you found yourself not only a virgin in her mid 20’s, but one that had never even laid in bed with a partner, been close, felt the weight of a lover on top of them… anything at all.

 The producers called it a wrap for the read through, and the sounds of chairs scraping on the floor filled the room. As people shot their empty plastic bottles into the trash you felt your stomach lurch, quickly leaving the room, finding the disabled bathroom and running to the toilet, the contents of your stomach very quickly coming back up. 

 Finally empty, you sat on the floor and rested your head against the wall, your mind spinning. A quiet knock at the door made you open one eye, watching as the unlocked door swung open and a familiar face peered round;

 “Are you ok?” Henry asked, his bulk almost filling the entire doorway; “You’re not coming down with something?”

 You shook your head;

 “No, just umm… nerves… haha…” you laughed rather awkwardly.

 Stepping into the room, he sat against the opposite wall, leaning forwards to hand you his half finished bottle of water;

 “... about tomorrow?”

 Taking a sip of water you nodded;

 “Bit pathetic really, isn’t it?”

 “Not at all. Is this your first onscreen love scene?”

 “Yeah”

 He sat forwards, resting his hands on his knees as he thought pensively for a moment;

 “Are you going out with the crew tonight?”

 “No. Can’t really face it”

 “How about I drive us back to the house and order some chinese and talk things through? This isn’t my first love scene but I remember the nerves. We’ll get everything out in the open so the air is clear ready for tomorrow, yeah?”

 Nodding, you watched as he stood, holding out his hand for you and helping you to your feet.

 -

 The drive back to the shared house that most of the main cast members were staying at was fun, Henry having linked his Spotify to the stereo, firing up a playlist of old school pop with an eclectic mix of metal. By the time he rolled into the large driveway that the rental house had, you were both yelling out the words, laughing and grinning. 

 Once inside you excused yourselves to go shower, twenty minutes later finding Henry in the kitchen. His hair was wet and he wore a t-shirt and pair of sweatpants as he looked over the chinese menu;

 “What do you fancy?” he asked and you tried not to blurt out what you were thinking, because even though you may be a virgin, your thoughts were far from pure. 

 Looking over the list he had already scribbled down, you pointed to a couple of dishes, watching as he added them to the list before dialling for delivery. 

 -

 Pushing your plate away you stretched out and groaned. Still shovelling egg fried rice into his mouth, Henry pointed his fork at your plate;

 “Roo dun?” he asked, his cheeks full like a hamster.

 “Help yourself!”

 He eagerly dumped the rest of your lemon chicken on top of his rice, jabbing at the pieces;

 “Hey, about tomorrow… you really don’t need to worry. It’s just going to be you and me, and three other people”

 Taking a sip of your beer you quietly snorted;

 “That’s still three more people that would ‘usually’ be there… and four more than i’ve ever experienced”

 He paused, setting his fork down and you could see his mind working through what you said;

 “So uhh, it's been a while…?”

 “To be honest, it's been never”

 It was like something short circuited in his brain;

 “Never never? Like, never?”

 Putting your beer down, you fiddled with the label;

 “I’m a virgin. I’ve never had sex. I’ve never even slept with anyone”

 There was an awkward silence, the air tense before Henry finally spoke;

 “Is it a religious thing?”

 You shook your head;

 “No. I just have been so wrapped up in studying or working or being on stage… I would get two dates into a relationship and some big opportunity would come up. I would get blinkered and end up ghosting guys without even realising. Ambition got in the way of a love life…”

 Henry took a deep breath;

 “Ok. So you know i’ll be covered up… down there i mean… and so will you… so there won’t be any slips or anything. I won’t be inside you or anything…”

 Cocking an eyebrow you scoffed;

 “Henry… I know you won’t be inside me. We studied sex scenes at stage school. They gave us the practical run down of what happens. It's lots of rubbing and grunting. I just need to go watch some porn again to figure out what to grunt…” you took a sip of your beer; “... and you probably wouldn’t fit inside me anyway… it’s not like anything has ever breached that hole”

 Henry sat with a wide eyed look on his face, his jaw hanging slack;

 “So you… you’ve never even pleasured yourself?”

 “Of course i have!” you threw a prawn cracker at him; “I’ve just never…. You know… had internal stimulation…”

 “Wow” he muttered quietly, shifting in his seat; “So…” he started again but then stopped, his brain seemingly unable to string a coherent sentence together. 

 Finally he cleared his throat;

 “So there’s never been any on set stuff?”

 “Nope. Usually I run through my lines for the next day, check the schedule, the set and makeup call times. I guess the one bonus about all of this is that there aren’t any lines for tomorrow”

 You both knew that the scene had been set up without dialogue, mostly from Netflix’s instruction because any erotic scenes can cause havoc with sensors in some countries when it comes to subtitles. 

 “What did you want to do now? Do you want an early night? Watch a movie? Talk? You want me to lay on top of you?” he asked, picking his now cold plate of food up and dumping the leftovers in the waste disposal.

 “Yes” you replied far too quickly.

 “Which part?”

 “All of it”

 -

 With the TV in the main living area out of action thanks to a rather rambunctious game of ping pong a few weeks ago, the pair of you had moved to Henry’s room. An hour into the movie and it was far from your thoughts, instead you were in the bizarre situation where Henry was literally laying on top of you as you had a conversation. The feeling of his weight pressing against you was at first a surprise, he was thick with muscles for the role, and with probably 200lbs of human pressing you against the mattress you had found you would have to shift now and again. Finally you found a position that was comfortable, and as you chatted about life you found your legs had naturally parted to allow him to lay between them, his stomach pressing to yours, his face inches from your own;

 “This is literally how we’ll be spending our day tomorrow you realise” he quietly pointed out

 “But there will be grunting too… plus some thrusting… it’ll probably get your ass in the gossip magazines as best ass in hollywood again” you teased him, knowing that the nudity he’d done in previous shows and movies had earned him a lot of attention thanks to his rather peachy behind.

 Henry pushed up a little, poking a finger to your breasts;

 “Oh yeah? Well these will earn you a whole legion of fans, you have an awesome pair of tits”

 “Pfft, they’re just average”

 “They’re good enough to give me a semi” he countered with a crooked grin on his face, using his finger to just tug at your neckline, exposing a tiny bit more skin.

 You shifted beneath him without even realising you were doing so and that’s when you felt it, a growing hardness pressing against your abdomen. Your eyes went wide as you stared up at him, the mix of emotions showing on his face;

 “I’ll get off…”

“No!” you instinctively wrapped your legs around his, leaning your head up and pressed a kiss to his lips. He let out a grunt of surprise and you felt him tense, before he softened, his lips following yours as you pulled rested your head back on the duvet beneath you.

 His lips were soft and plump, and as he rocked his hips against you again this time you felt he was getting harder. Instinctively you gasped, and he took the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth. You may not have had sex before but you had kissed, and your tongue danced with his as hands started to explore each others bodies, fingers seeking out skin as t-shirts were tugged up to expose heated skin. 

 Pulling your shirt over your head he admired your naked chest, the pattern on your top having hidden the fact you were without a bra;

 “Oh yeah, even purple these’ll be popular”

 With a smirk on his lips and a wicked grin on his face he lowered his mouth to your naked torso, taking one peaked nipple between his lips to suck on it, his hand cupping your other breast. As he worked his magic your body responded, the wetness between your thighs soaking through your clothing, the subtle movements of your bodies rubbing together making your arousal almost uncontrollable. Winding your hands into his dark locks, the soft hair curled around your fingers as he looked at you, pressing a trail of kisses down your sternum until he reached your leggings;

 “Can i continue?” he asked quietly, watching as you nodded your head;

 “Yes… please…”

 As he pulled your leggings off he pressed kisses to the heated skin that he revealed, never breaking eye contact;

 “So here’s what i’m going to do… first i’m going to get you to cum with my tongue, i’ll slip it just a little inside you so you can get used to the feeling, then i’ll gently tease you with my fingers; find that g-spot of yours as i’ve been assured a g-spot orgasm is completely different from a clitoral orgasm…

 “Fuck…”

 “Yes, that’s the third thing…” he grinned at you; “Once you’re nice and ready, and really really wet i’m going to make love to you… so you can practice your moans for tomorrow…”

 He shed you of the rest of your clothing before softly grasping your legs and pulling them apart, revealing your virgin core. Tender fingers parted your petals before his tongue swiped a wide stripe through them, and the sound that emerged from your throat startled even you.

 “You like that?”

 “Yes… oh my god, please do that again!”

 “With pleasure!”

 “The pleasure is all mine…”

 “Henry?”

 “Yes?”

 “Please shut up and get on with it” you grinned at him, before he dipped his face back between your legs and went to town. His tongue was seemingly everywhere, grunts and moans as he worked you open, and when he slipped his tongue into the ring of muscle at your entrance your eyes shot open and you giggle-moaned at the unfamiliar but not unpleasant experience. When a finger found your clit you relaxed again, laying back and enjoying the pleasure he was selflessly giving you. 

 Gripping at the bedcovers you found your hips started to move on their own, only for Henry to press a strong arm across your stomach to hold you in place, pushing you closer and closer to your orgasm. When it finally did hit your body reacted instinctively; your legs wrapping themselves around his head, your back arching and your fingers almost tearing through the fabric of the sheets, before you finally went limp. As your mind was nothing but stars a muffled voice came through the haze of your post orgasmic bliss;

 “If i could get some oxygen…”

 Not realising your legs were still firmly wrapped around Henry’s head, you quickly released him, his head popping up from beneath your thighs. His cheeks were flushed red and his chin was wet, and it took you a moment to realise you were the cause for the wetness. He wiped his chin with the back of his hand before standing and grabbing a bottle of water to pass to you;

 “You’re gonna need to rehydrate after that…”

 You went to take the bottle from him but the bulging tent in his sweatpants distracted you, your hand pausing mid air before Henry laughed;

 “Drink first, then you can play with it”

 “Oh… I… “

 “Drink”

 Taking the bottle you sipped at the tepid liquid as he lay on the bed beside you. When you’d finished he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you to his firm chest before kissing you softly;

 “Are you ready for round two?”

 “Can i touch you too?”

 A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth before he nodded, watching as you eased the elastic of his sweats down and his heavy cock sprang free. Your jaw fell as you took in his size, but before you could overthink it he pressed a kiss to your lips as his hands wandered between your thighs. 

 Reaching out you wrapped your fingers around him as his own slid between your folds, dancing over your clit before he pressed a single digit inside you, your eyes going wide and your hand squeezing him involuntarily. 

 “Does that feel good?”

 You nodded;

 “Yes, a little strange that i’m not in control, but i think that’s what makes it even more exciting”

 “That’s good… now, how about another finger?”

 Nodding again you bit your lip as he slid a second finger in alongside the first, your eager hole stretching around his digits. Instinctively you had started to move your hand up and down his shaft, doing little more than gentle movements, but soon the pair of you got into a rhythm, working together to leave your breaths in time with the others.

 “Doing so well for me… so wet. Shall we try a third?”

 Nodding you let out a quiet ‘uh-huh’ as he repositioned his hand, carefully sliding three fingers into your soaked velvet channel, and the noise that came from your throat was base and full of sin. When his thumb started to rub against your clit while he continued to work three fingers inside you the spring in your belly snapped and you were coming hard, shaking around his hand.

 As you came down from your high Henry carefully withdrew his fingers, salaciously licking them clean before he got off the bed and went to the drawer in the little cabinet, pulling out a condom.

 “Oh… i’m on the pill…” you blurted out; “You don’t have to… In fact i’d really like to feel you, you know… bare…”

 Tearing the packet open he grinned at you;

 “I get that… but you’re gonna be in makeup in less than 12 hours” he knelt on the bed as he started to roll the latex down his angry dick.

 “Umm yeah?”

 “Well its something you’d only know from experience, but it can take up to 24 hours for a guys cum to fully leak out of you”

 “Oh…”

 “And your costume and makeup gets pretty intimate, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah…”

 “So you want Iris in makeup to be able to smell my cum dripping out of you when she’s painting your snatch purple tomorrow?” he said with a grin on his face, rolling the condom down fully before positioning himself between your legs

 “I gotta be honest, the idea that someone realises i’ve had sex is kinda kinky” you craned your neck up to kiss him as you felt his dick notch at the entrance to your cunt; “But you’re the expert here”

 “That i am… Let me show you just how much of an expert…”

 With a smooth roll of his hips he pushed into you and the feeling was indescribable, in fact it was so overwhelming you screwed your eyes shut, willing the tears not to fall, but Henry simply held still, kissing each one of your tears as they fell down your cheeks until you were ready.

 “Breathe babe… just breathe… it’s overwhelming i know… i understand…”

 Opening your eyes you gazed up at him, smiling as he leaned down and kissed you softly.

 “Are you ok?”

 “Y-yeah…”

 “You want me to keep going?”

 “Please… oh god please”

 “Gonna make you feel so good”

 He carefully pulled his hips back before pushing into you again, seemingly getting deeper before pulling out again. Soon you were lost in the moment, feelings both physical and emotionally almost overwhelming you again as your body was taken to new heights of pleasure, Henry seemingly knowing exactly how to make the moment special for you.

 Your body reacted in the best way, the tight spring inside you curling ever tighter, until with just the right roll of his hips he tipped you over the edge and you were coming hard, your body squeezing him so tight he knew he’d found heaven whilst you saw stars. 

 Whilst you were in the haze of your orgasm you heard the most beautiful moans, and felt as Henry came deep within you. As soon as he stopped shaking he wrapped his arms around you tightly, pressing his face to your neck as he cradled the back of your head with his massive hand, pressing soft kisses to your heated skin as you both basked in the aftershocks of your intense orgasms.

 Finally Henry pushed himself up to bear his weight on one arm, sliding his other hand between your bodies to hold the condom in place as he carefully pulled out of you;

 “I’m just gonna get rid of this… stay here”

 You watched his peachy ass as he quickly mad his way to the bathroom, hearing water running before he reappeared moments later with a damp washcloth. Sitting delicately beside you he carefully cleaned you up, and when he was finished he pulled the duvet over your naked body as he quickly got rid of the cloth and joined you, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and pulling you to his chest;

 “Are you ok?”

 “I think so… Did i make a mess of your bed?”

 “No. No blood”

 “Really? I thought…”

 “If you’re relaxed enough you may not bleed… or you may have simply ruptured your hymen just through every day life. A fall, tampons, strenuous exercise… didn’t you do a horseriding movie a couple of years back?”

 “Y-yeah…” you cast your mind back; “Now you mention it, there was one really long day when i’d spent all day shooting a galloping scene with jumps… i just thought my period was coming early, and i had this really dull ache in my lower back… i guess that makes sense now…”

 “So… you’re good? Feel ok about filming tomorrow?”

 You nodded;

 “Yeah, i’m good. Thank you” You looked up at him and saw he was chewing his lip nervously; “What?”

 “I was wondering… you know… after we’ve finished filming tomorrow… did you want to go to dinner with me?”

 “Like a date?”

 “Yeah… hey i understand if you say no… that you want to concentrate on your role and acting…”

 “No! I mean yes!” you took a deep breath; “I’d love to go to dinner with you”

 He pressed a kiss to your cheek before you settled on his chest, his strong heartbeat beating beneath your ear as you let your eyelids drop and you fell asleep in his arms.

 -

 Iris tutted as you fidgeted;

 “Will you stand still? I need to get these scales on!”

 “Sorry Iris… just a little sore…”

 The older woman looked up at you as she held the patch of purple scales prosthetic and grinned;

 “Well its about time” she nodded to the various bottles and jars that were on the counter; “Make sure you take the coconut oil when you leave tonight, it’ll help get the adhesive off without pulling on any bruises”

 You looked down at Iris and smiled;

 “Thanks Iris”

 “Was it worth it?”

 “So worth it”

[chronicbitchsyndrome]

Not sure if this is okay to send, but I agree that the physical health vs mental health discourse happening is confusing to me. I personally hate the idea of rejecting the body/mind duality because using it for myself has protected me, but I also hear that this isn’t the case for everyone and that supporting body/mind dualism can be dangerous. I don’t entirely know what to think about this but atm I’m just trying to learn things and figure out my perspective on this, so thank you for posting things on the discourse. I know you’re not doing it for anyone specifically but it’s been helpful for me.

i... am having a hard time answering this ask, honestly.

like, i am really glad that the things i post have been helpful for you. i don't think you're a shitty person for believing in mind-body dualism, and i don't even think it's bad to believe in something that doesn't line up with consensus reality... i don't think it's helpful to reality check people even on beliefs that are immediately harmful.

i have a hard time with this topic because it's difficult for me to navigate people being helped by a belief that's just... genuinely only harmful because it's inaccurate. like, the engrained social assumption that the brain is separate from the rest of the body has held back our understanding of medicine significantly and is part of why psychiatry in particular is so abusive and unhelpful to nd people--the entire medical system is engrained with a pervasive piece of misinformation that working as if it's true actively hurts our understanding of illness, treatment, etc.

yknow, in a lot of the medical community, fibromyalgia is still considered a mental health problem and thus to not "truly" affect any organ other than the brain--because the brain can't affect any other part of your body. it's treated with CBT and mindfulness techniques.

and like... a lot of it is centered in the brain, from what little research im able to access on the topic. it's just that the brain is an organ and affects every other organ. but the idea that the brain is separate from every other organ means that, fundamentally, it should be treated separately, and so in spaces that subscribe to the idea that fibro is a mental health problem, fibro patients don't get any other treatment for any other organ.

it's like... the idea that teeth are separate from the rest of our bodies, so dentristry should be a separate school of medicine from... the rest of medicine. but that's not true, teeth are a part of the body and problems with your teeth can affect almost every other part of your body, and people die all the time because of the idea that these systems are separate. literally, people get sick and die constantly because dentists don't know how to treat cardiac symptoms stemming from tooth problems and medical doctors don't know how to treat tooth problems that are causing cardiac symptoms, and there is no communication between the fields of medicine, and their insurances are handled separately.

and it's like... i don't know how to handle validating someone's self-determination that their symptoms are localized to one single organ and have no effect on other organs, because that's just not how biology works, and while i understand it can be comforting i also don't understand how it can be a genuinely good basis to treat your symptoms from, or how you can have an accurate understanding of your symptoms while working from a fundamentally impossible basis.

and it's not disabled people's responsibilities to treat our bodies well or make good choices for them, and nobody's obligated to do the best practices to take care of themselves. i'm an addict and i do drugs i know have a chance of biting me in the ass later and i am not lesser as a disabled person because of it, and neither is anyone else.

i just... have always been a proponent of having the right knowledge to work from, and for everyone to make informed decisions about our health, regardless of if we choose to do the "healthiest" option or not. and so seeing people spread the idea that mind-body dualism is correct, or can be correct, when that's something that's objectively disprovable and kills untold numbers of people each year--thats something i don't know how to handle.

it's like when people argue that it's up to personal choice whether to believe in diet culture myths or not? when that's something that's actively killing people, there's massive social pressure to believe in, and is objectively disprovable and has tons of evidence to the contrary? and i do believe everyone has bodily autonomy and can do whatever they want with their bodies, but i still can't help but wince when someone says it's genuinely healthy to be underweight and that being overweight is more dangerous? yeah its like that.

this was certainly not the response you were looking for, and i am sorry i can't do better in response to you. i am glad that you find some of the things i post helpful, however.

[0verthinking1t]

How it's going

(before I get into it, a little TL;DR I wanted to make sure is visible from the top: if you're looking to apply for SSI and, like me, have no idea what you're doing and don't know where to start, look at Atticus.com . They're a legal firm/database that will screen you for eligibility and then match you with a law office/lawyer who will help you apply and get approved. There's no up front cost; the fee for legal services is 25% of your first benefit check only, IF you get approved. I know that seems like a lot, but it's because the first check usually includes backpay for application time and any amount of time you were eligible before you applied. I know it's overwhelming, and so do they; making your first steps with you and advising you the whole way is literally what these lawyers are there for, they're expecting you to feel a little lost. ❤️)

So not long ago, I found myself in one of the worst brain fog episodes I've ever had, almost in tears because I couldn't even muster enough neurotransmitters to START sitting up off my bed, let alone take the shower I needed (and I say "almost", because I couldn't muster the neurotransmitters to actually feel anything other than TV static 😭). By the next day, I had decided to make a change, dug up some tips from fellow neurodivergent folks online, and made a plan. Thus, things like the Task Menu and Random Encounter die were born. I want to take a minute to report on this process of basically relearning how to ACTUALLY function around my mental illnesses, instead of basing the structure of my whole life on the desperation of fitting in to society.

So far, things are going pretty well, everything considered. The strategies I'm developing are accomplishing what I designed them to accomplish; I've been getting up and more actively existing instead of being a rock, and for the most part, it's eased the terrible zombie feeling in my head. Some days are better than others, of course, but I went into that acknowledging that and ready to forgive myself if I need to rest or wander off course. after all, those things just happen; that is the very nature of the things physically and chemically wrong in my brain, and that's all there is to it. Things like keeping track of things I actually do during the day as well as what I expect to get done, or like adding up the number of those things and keeping track like a daily high score, help me to view this as a process of positive reaching rather than negative guilting. And honestly, I actually have been crossing a lot of real things I had piled up off the Megaboard. I feel good about this, and I'm making a very positive start on things.

Of course, there's always room for improvement, and this process has helped me identify where I need help more clearly. I've been able to identify that, even with this daily structure keeping me rolling, I don't seem to have the mental energy to do even simple errands a lot of the time, like making doctor's appointments, or doing house cleaning, or following up on problems. Even this info has been invaluable to me though; I was able to bring it up to my psychiatrist at our last visit, and to take a critical look for myself at how bad my disability REALLY is and whether or not I was actually managing as well as I thought for the last few years. Did I really benefit from the structure provided around full time work? What was motivating me to get through basic routine every day, and how was it impacting my mood? I find that in my natural state, I need gentle reminders to drift through things like hygiene and nutrition; looking back, I realize how the same routine things that make me feel better now we're actually detracting from my mood, because I had to force them to happen around work hours at times I wouldn't normally do them. I half-assed breakfast with a protein bar every day because I wasn't hungry in the morning, so food stopped making me happy and generating motivation. I would skip brushing teeth (either consciously or accidentally) in order to make a bus/train, and just do it in the bathroom at work with a little travel toothbrush five minutes before my shift. "Play" during my off hours became "doing absolutely nothing", because I was too miserable and exhausted to indulge in more stimulating hobbies. Basically what I noticed, is that I never actually had this type of mental energy in the first place— I was in a sort of debt to myself for spending spoons I didn't have.

Continuing to look at my disabilities and realistic expectations of myself, I've noticed that I honestly don't feel ready to return to work soon in any capacity, and I'm not sure if I ever will. I'd love to get back to the art business I was setting up a while ago and have some sense of purpose through that, but I just don't feel a connection to any sort of structured employment I qualify for. Having realized that, I finally took further steps toward SSI, and found a lead on legal services to help me apply. I now have a law firm filling out my app as I write and sending me paperwork to sign, and the whole thing is suddenly much more concrete and real.

That brings me to the last thing I wanted to ramble on a bit— life updates 😊 I just mentioned the lawyer I contacted about SSI, and my recent psych appointment. Things are going well, treatment-wise, and we're working on tweaking doses and refining what works. We added anti-anxiety meds now that we know how stimulants and Prozac are working out. I also feel comfortable talking to him about the SSI process, and that he's willing to support me on that as well. As for personal goals, I've been able to keep better track of things like feeding Blyth consistently, showing up to D&D on time, and getting errands done in a timely manor. Time management for games was a big one for me— over the past couple months, I've lost track and been late a lot, either because I hyperfixated on something and lost awareness of time, or because I lost awareness of days of the week, or because I had trouble taking D&D with friends out of the mental "later" category and putting it into the "now" one. I feel really good about being able to change that for my friends 😊

Today, I'm allowing myself a bit of a cheat day. There are some things I'll feel ready to do closer to evening, but for now, I'm just lazing around with Princess Mars. I spent the last couple days at a friend's place, which was fun and relaxing, but I still needed a quiet day to recharge my social battery and let my worked-out deep conversation muscle rest and unflex. I feel better so far. I'm proud of the start I've made ❤️

[the-firebird69]

Make things such a hassle it's not worth dealing with you and you Max should understand you've never been engaged before like this and you're running around like little toddlers saying you want something because people gave you a black eye no I'm sick of you here everybody on Earth is sick of you idiots both of you Max and the idiot Max what you're doing is barf you're pissing us off you're pissing all over our son who could care less about you jackasses he wants you all dead you mean Mac retard and you Max you have no plan that makes any sense and we're not trying to make sense of it for you we're not doing the work for you paving the way for you or making it happen for you we're going to get rid of you you're stupid douchebags right now we're moving to assault your facilities we've had it with you and your stupid a****** s*** everyday with a young person you're out of your mind when he sees as you doing it in the bunkers and you doing it right here any idiots doing it you're clever twits running around with a stupid a****** smile you end up dead in the news or you just end up dead I mean what a victory okay you're creaming each other is a fascinating thing for you we're sitting there wiping out huge numbers of you and just sit there with a smile like some sort of stupid dork

We don't care how you think it went in the past it wasn't going that way you are as a bunch of sacrificing idiots and the sacrifices are no longer good because you're acting and your attitude your demeanor your motif your modus operandi are all contrary to ours your act below so bad people kill you because your act blows so bad no matter what you're doing your inane little a****** children and he's right the whole time he's been saying these people have something wrong with them they need to leave and you're not going to leave on your ships I can't stand you so bad I'm going to cut every single one of you Max off from doing anything you don't even carry you sit there for years picking your nose picking your ass you like this guy Tommy f point I see a fruit cake he said it was cuz our daughter is on Venus we don't want those big lasers up there all of you start chattering and blabbing trying to convince everybody that's what it is and you got nailed and this dork walking around with a big PUD with his penis out as a gangster in the middle of all these foreign cities I mean he is such a loser his people got crucified he almost took his wee wee out and yeah there are stories he did cuz our son said your chicken s*** so the guy did it and he's under the influence cuz he's a complete he's an insane Maniac you guys are mental patients you belong in the mental hospital all of you do and with that I'm sending new orders this pile of s*** has to go

-he calls you abnormally week morons is that what you are you have just an insatiable attitude to bother people in appetite and you get killed your brains get blown out you think you're invincible or something cuz you keep getting shot in the head see you for your from it healing and we have to get rid of you

-there's a few things that we've done and we're taking steps towards this goal we don't want the max here either they're a bunch of jackasses they're going to drain them down and the clones but just coordinating them off and snuffing them out the foreigners are doing it too and boy you people unreasonable douchebags you have really absolutely nothing to negotiate with yet and you're acting like you have everything

-we're activating our Giants using you and you can't figure that out you're the fuel the more you go to inquire about the Giants the more if you die

-we have a lot of calls coming in but basically you're going to fumigate yourself any moment now and you're going down with big groups to what you think your caverns is seeing where your units were disabled some of them and you're carrying on like you're the man of La mancha and you're going to get incinerated and you're sending down Armies. There's a huge number of them and that's a units they're sending down in blocks they say or whatever each one of them as well all of them added up together are equal to about 0.01% of your populace on the whole and that's not many the percentage of Max is about 0.2% which is teeny but this going to increase daily and possibly faster when they notice that nobody is coming back this question is it go through their mind why aren't they coming back and what are they doing and how are the only up and up see you sending machines down there and you're trying to get them to send stuff back doesn't seem to be working we anticipate by the end of the week which is Friday 1% of your entire population will go down a day and not return we do understand why they're not returning and we are raising Giants using them

-huge Giants are out in the West and others have been located in giant armies are surrounding them each and every giant has a humongous contingent if you add them all up it's about 0.25% of your entire populace or what you consider the Earth to me now it's your population. That is a huge number for only you having been announced yesterday more to follow

Thor Freya

Olympus

Zues Hera

[davidmann95]

How about those JL storyboards?

In case you haven’t heard, Zack Snyder is putting on display the ‘storyboards’ - i.e. a rough plot summary accompanied by some Jim Lee sketches - for what would have been Justice League 2 and 3, or as this puts it 2 and ‘2A’. You can see them here (I imagine better-quality versions will soon be released), and read a transcript here. This is evidently a very early version: this was apparently pitched prior to the release of BvS and Justice League being rewritten in the wake of it, with numerous plot details that now don’t line up with what we know about the Snyder Cut, plus it outright mentions it builds on the originally planned versions of the Batman and Flash movies. But it’s a broad outline of what was gonna go down, and while I initially thought it was Snyder throwing in the towel, the timing - paired with the ambiguity left by the necessity for changes, including that this doesn’t factor whatever that “massive cliffhanger” at the end of the Cut is - says to me he’s hoping this’ll be a force multiplier behind efforts to will sequel/s into existence. He’s probably right.

I’ll be discussing spoilers below, but in short: with this Zack Snyder has finally lived up to Alan Moore, in that like Twilight of the Superheroes I wouldn’t believe this was real as opposed to a shockingly on-point parody if not for direct, irrefutable evidence.

Doing some rapid-fire bullet points for this baby to kick us off:

* Folks who know the subject say a lot of this is a yet further continuation of Snyder doing Arthuriana fanfic with the League reskinned over those major players, and I’ll take their word for it.

* I don’t know whether I love or hate that in Justice League 2 the Justice League are only an extant thing for the first scene, and then it’s Snyder giving everybody their own mini-movies. It’s compressing the entire MCU “loosely interconnected solo stories leading to a single big movie later” strategy into a single movie!

*  Funniest line in the whole thing: "Even Lantern has heard of the Kryptonian, worried that he's under the control of Darkseid. He heard his spirit was unbreakable." Hal what fuckin' Superman movie did YOU watch? Second funniest being “IT WILL GIVE HIM POWER OVER ALL LIVING LIFE”

* 90% of the plot I have nothing to say about, it’s generic stage-setting crap. That to be clear is the ‘shocked it’s Snyder’ element, it feels so crassly commercial in a way I can’t believe is coming from the BvS guy.

* Most of what I have to say is unsurprisingly gonna be about a handful of characters but Cyborg’s happy ending being “he isn’t visibly disabled anymore!” is not great!

* The Goddess of War battle with Superman...never pays off? No clue why it’s there.

* What I’d originally heard was that the Codex in Superman’s blood was the last key to the Anti-Life Equation and that’s why Darkseid was coming to Earth. It’s not like all of this wouldn’t have already been averted by Kal-El’s pod smacking into an asteroid on the way to Earth so it’s not as if this makes it any more Superman’s fault, and it would have at least tied all this back to the beginning of the movies, but I suppose that was either fake or from a later draft.

* I have NO idea how this was reimagined without the ‘love triangle’, it’s the central character thing and the entire climax flows directly out of it!

* Darkseid’s kinda a chump in this, huh

Anonymous said: So: Does Zack Snyder hate Superman?

Look: the hilarity of this when Cuck Kent has been a go-to Snyder cult insult towards ‘inferior’ takes on Superman for years cannot be understated, yet at the same time I can almost wrap my brain around where Snyder’s coming from with that as the end for his take on the character. He talked in that Variety piece on how his interest in Superman is informed by having adopted children himself, and Deborah Snyder is the stepmother to his kids by previous relationships, so I can see where he’d be coming from, and I can even imagine how he’d see this as ‘rhyming’ in the sense of “the series begins with Kal-El being adopted by Earth, it ends with him adopting a child of Earth!” In the same way as MARTHA, I can envision how he would put these pieces together in his head thematically without registering or caring what the end result would actually look like. In this case, Superman raising the kid of the man who beat the shit out of him who Batman had with Clark’s wife, who earlier told Bruce she was staying with Clark because he ‘needed her’, suggesting if inadvertently that this really honest to god was a “she’s only staying with Superman out of pity, she really loved Batman more” thing.

But Clark is nothing in this. He’s sad and existential because of coming back from the dead I guess, then he’s corrupted, then time’s undone and he woo-rah rallies the collective armies of the world (interesting angle for the ‘anti-military/anti-establishment’ Superman he’s talked up as) as his big heroic moment in the finale, and then he stops being sad because he’s adopting a kid. So his big much-ballyhooed, extremely necessary five-movie character arc towards truly becoming Superman was:

Sad weird kid -> sad weird kid learns he’s an alien, is still weird and sad, maybe he shouldn’t save people because things could go really wrong? -> his dad is so convinced it could go wrong he lets himself die -> ????? -> Clark is saving people anyway -> learns his origin, gets an inspiring speech about being a bridge between worlds and a costume -> becomes superman (not Superman, that’s later) to save the world, albeit a very property-damagey version, rejects his heritage he just learned about and space dad’s bridge idea -> folks hate him being superman and that sucks though at least he’s got a girlfriend now -> things go so wrong he considers not being superman but his ghost dad reminds him shit always goes wrong so he should be good anyway, which sorta feels like it contradicts his previous advice -> immediate renewed goodness is out the window as he’s blackmailed into having to try and kill a dude but the dude happens to coincidentally have some things in common so they don’t kill each other after all -> big monster now but superman keeps supermaning at it because he loves his girlfriend and he dies -> he’s brought back, wears black which apparently means now he likes Krypton again? -> he has work friends now but he’s still sad because he was dead -> evil now! -> wait nevermind time travel -> rallies the troops -> his wife’s having a kid so he’s not sad anymore -> Superman! Who gives way to more Batman.

Do I think Zack Snyder is lying when he says he likes Superman? No. I think he sincerely finds much of the basic conceits and imagery engaging. But I don’t think he meaningfully gives shit about Clark as a character, just a vessel for Big Iconic Beats he wants to hit. Whereas while for instance he’s critical of Batman as an idea (at least up to a point), he’s much more passionately, directly enamored with him as a presence and personality. So while Superman may be the character whose ostensible myth cycle or arc or however it’s spun might be propelling a lot of events here, it’s a distant appreciation - of course the other guy takes over and subsumes him into his own narrative. Of course Batman is the savior, the past and the future (though if he’s supposed to be Batman’s kid raised by Superman there’s no excuse for him not to be Nightwing), the tragic martyr to our potential. Admittedly the implication here is also that Batman can apparently only REALLY with his whole heart be willing to sacrifice his life to save an innocent, for that matter apparently his great love, once said innocent is a receptacle for his Bat-brood, but he and Clark are both already irredeemable pieces of shit by the end of BvS so it’s not like this even registers by comparison.

Anonymous said: That “plan” Snyder had was utter dogshit. Picture proof that DC & WB hate Superman. Also I love how you’re like Jor-El: Every single idealistic take you had about Snyder, his fandom, and BvS was wrong. Snyder’s an edgy hack, his fanbase just wants to jerk off to their edgy self-insert Batgod as he screams FUCK while mowing people down with machine guns, and the idea that BvS said Superman was better than Bats was completely wrong. You know what comes next SuperMann: Either you die or I do.

In the final analysis, beyond that mother of god is there sure no conceivable excuse for the treatment of Lois in this? The temptation is to join that anon and say as I originally tweeted that these were “built entirely to disabuse every single redemptive reading of the previous work and any notion of these movies as nuanced, artistic, self-reflective, or meaningful”.

...

...

...yeah, okay, that’s mostly right. Zack Snyder’s vision really was the vision of an edgelord idiot with bad ideas who was never going to build up to anything that would reframe it all as a sensible whole. He’s a sincere edgelord genuinely trying really hard with his bad ideas who put some of them together quite cleverly! But they’re fucking bad and the endgame was never anything more than ramping up into smashing the action figures together as big as he could, the political overtones and moral sketchiness of BvS while trying to say something in that movie reverberated through the grand scheme of his pentalogy in no way beyond giving his boys a big sad pit to rise out of so when they kicked ass later it’d rule harder, and all the gods among men questions and horror and trappings were only that: trappings. Apparently he’s really pleasant and well-meaning in person, but at his core his art as embodied in a couple weeks in his 4-hour R-rated Justice League movie meant to be seen in black-and-white all comes down to that time he yelled at someone on Twitter that he couldn’t appreciate Snyder’s work because it’s for grown-ups. He made half-clever, occasionally exciting shit cape movies for a bunch of corny pseudo-intellectual douchebags, folks latching onto and justifying blockbusters that at least acknowledge how horrifying the world is right now even if the superheroes are basically useless in the face of it if not outright part of the problem until a convenient alien invasion shows up to justify them, and a handful of non-asshole smart people who vibe with it but...well. ‘Suckered’ is a harsh word, and definitely doesn’t apply to all of them re: what they’ve gotten out of it up to this point and would (somehow) get out of this. But it doesn’t apply to none of them, either.

[ganymedesclock]

do you have any thoughts on mentor archetypes in general? i looked it up and most of the analysis was about how they invariably die...

I have a lot of thoughts on mentor archetypes, particularly considering it is arguably my job to be a mentor (I am an early childhood educator)

I really love mentoring as a character trait, but I can really hate some of the ways that it applies. There are two problems I think that tend to consume mentor characters (and I’ll add a bonus thought to make three), though they aren’t exclusive nor exhaustive:

mentorhood as a get out of jail free card

mentorhood as the only important thing old people can do

mentorhood as an isolated special incident

1. Mentorhood as a get out of jail free card

I get it. The introduction of Yoda as a character was influential to many people’s childhoods mine included. We love our hard knocks montage. But the fact of the matter is, both educationally and morally speaking, there’s like. a lot of reasons you should not be a dick to someone you’re teaching, and why if a character is being a dick to a student, in particular a student who is younger and needier than them, this should be a character flaw.

(A GREAT example of this wielded effectively as a character flaw: look at Shifu in Kung Fu Panda! Half of the first movie is examining that Shifu’s tough love schtick not only created Tai Lung as a villain by his own admission, but hurt Tigress personally, and Po who was already pretty willing to give up on himself, gave up more until Shifu had a realization and got his ass in gear; and it is made clear in the later movies that it’s because he was grappling with a lot of emotional issues)

Basically it shouldn’t be a joke that the mentor is strict, or harsh, or cruel. Especially don’t make jokes about corporal punishment, which we have better and better science pointing to that it is abusive and fails to teach. 

And part of this is tricky, because a lot of the mentor tropes we’re fed are abusive or flawed mentors, and if you exclusively load the cannon with that sort of material, that’s what’s gong to come out of you unprompted. It’s important to think carefully about what’s actually being taught and being learned. And there should be, bluntly spoken, a reason why these people like their mentors, and if they don’t, that will hurt their progress. There’s no niche so precious that you just HAVE to put up with them. If a mentor is the legendary best in the land, but a terrible person to put up with, it’s not inconceivable that the protagonist is gonna pack their stuff and go talk to the second best in the land who isn’t such a pill. And if the hero stays, then, it’s become an enduring character trait that they will tolerate maltreatment in the interest of a higher goal and that’s not necessarily a good thing.

2. Mentorhood as the only important thing old people can do

This is simply an elaboration on my previous post which I presume inspired anon’s question, but your setting doesn’t simply have a handful of old masters who were young and skilled some long time ago but are now old and beyond doing anything important- or, if it does, there’s a story there. For example, in one of my personal projects, Bevy, there are very few veterans in a particular organization because the organization is fairly recent and because it had an extremely high mortality rate at first- so the few elders that are there, all know each other, and tend highly skilled and highly respected. They’re the survivors of a bleak time. 

And even then, that’s going to be a mixed bag. The elderly grandmother-type who is one of the major characters contrasts against a fashionably middle-aged former knight who keeps the main bastion of the organization safe and running smoothly.

Basically, it’s important to consider that old people are simply just people who’ve been people for a long time. They are still doing everything that younger people get up to. Not every old person is weak or infirm. Not every old person who does have disabilities gained them because of age. Not every old person is entrenched in all their skills and passions because they’ve been doing them for years- people pick up new things all the time, and that’s a by-product of being alive, not of being young.

Old people are allowed to still give a shit about their own life and progress- rather than simply lying back and abdicating to the young on the idea they already have one foot in a grave. This is especially harsh in series where the mean age is low- it might seem funny to joke about how the one 25-year-old in a cast of 10-year-olds is old, but the frank and brutal reality is that if a thirty year old is acting like they’re retirement age something’s brutally wrong here. 

Basically, treat elders in your stories like they’re full people. Any society or organization that’s been around will have old people! This is a thing about worldbuilding that I find highly incredulous sometimes- almost no populations will exclusively be 18-30 year olds. Anywhere people have been for a while, there’ll be old people, and anywhere people intend to stay will have at least a few kids. 

And “old” is not a personality trait- the old people won’t all be limited to wise elders or lonely twilight wanderers or indulgent grandparents and even if they have those qualities they sure as hell won’t be a vacuum. Maybe the lively, playful shopkeep that the detective gets some important intel from is pushing seventy. 

3. Mentorhood as an isolated special incident

Teaching should really not be a matter of training montages. The fact of the matter is, and this ties strongly into the above- in any context, at any time, people will have an uneven level of experience. We are a highly social species. We are wired to take advantage of the fact that we’re usually in groups, and even when not in groups, we can observe or understand what came before us and synthesize personal experience from secondhand experience.

To me, I feel like if there’s a big weakness with the archetypal Mentor, it’s that there’s only one, and all they do is teach. Some people do make teaching a career, and that’s important! But guess what, when I took my job, I’d never learned how to change a diaper before. I was taught, on the job, by my coworkers. I didn’t check into a monastery to practice rigorously on baby dolls before I ever approached an infant.

This is something that comes more easily once you’ve done the work- if you have a cast of characters with diverse ages, backgrounds, and levels of experience, a lot of teaching will just happen organically. Person X will go to do something, realize person Y doesn’t know how, and so person X will show person Y. X doesn’t need to be older, or A Mentor Archetype, or anything in particular.

People learn from each other, constantly, and for a lot of reasons. And learning is often more meaningful when we integrate it into our daily life. 

[jasmehraj]

Chaos in the get together

The tapping sound on the new and polished wooden floor intensified as she danced to her favourite tune. 

She lifted her hand and her legs moved in a practised motion. A small laugh escaped her lips when she almost fell from the edge of her little stage, and two arms wrapped around her torso saving her from the inevitable fall.

They fell into an easy dance like they've been doing this for years.

"It's my class reunion in a few days."

"And?"

"You are going with me."

His lips turned upwards, "Your majesty, can't really deny you."

"Hmm."

The song finished and they both bowed.

"So? MDC originals?" The handsome man, her fiance made weird hand gestures as if trying to copy her. She elbowed him which caused him to mock gasp.

"You are such a jerk." 

The lights were dimly lit. There were multiple people in there, most of them dressed in expensive clothing, trying to show off. There were some rare people who came in casual outfits. And Marinette and Jason happened to be one of them. (Umm I mean kinda sorta one of them? If leather jackets, jeans, combat boots, glasses or a biker look in general counts as casual.)

They both entered hand in hand. 

"You know what? I'm already dying of boredom." Jason pouted and put a hand on his chest.

Marinette just chuckled, "Then I will have to go home with a ghost.-" She grabbed his collar to make him bend down to her height-," and find someone else to marry me next week."

Jason mock-gasped again, "You really know how to tame me huh?"

Marinette giggled, "That's what happens when you stay in relationship with a dork for 5 years."

Jason replied with a smirk, "Well then it's good that you have this hot and sexy dork on your side."

They both joked their way inside.

Suddenly everything went silent. Both their laughs jacked in when they noticed the sudden silence.

"If it isn't the loser." A girl in orange (AAAHH MY EYES, SO MUCH SPARKLE! FEELS LIKE I'M LOOKING AT A BOTTLE OF SPARKLE) dress came hand in hand with a green eyed blonde. "How is the biggest failure in the world doing?"

Marinette adjusted her glasses and pretended to check her nails, "I don't know how are you doing?"

This filled the orange dressed girl with rage. She went redder and redder with every second. "I'm a success, I'm dating Adrien Agreste, the face of the Agreste company from 6 years, he's mine now-"

Marinette yawned dramatically, "yada yada yada, you are saying that you are dating my ex, you know what, I ate sandwich today, want those leftovers too?" 

Everyone looked at Marinette with horrified expressions on their face. Lila was standing there opening and closing her mouth looking like a fish.

"That was really mean Marinette, you shouldn't start a fight with Lila, we are here on a get-together-" Jason moved just a little and Adrien took a step back cautiously.-"And can you tell your fling to back off?"

The word fling was said with such disgust that made Marinette laugh.

"You mean my fiance? Sorry sunshine but he can't stand at one place with assholes around." Adrien made a hurt face like he was a puppy kicked by someone on the footpath.

"Fiance? Congratulations Marinette!" The whole room gave congratulations to her while Lila and Adrien stood at the side trying to gain their attention again but failing miserably.

"Let's Go Adrien." Lila huffed and made their way towards the door. Adrien followed behind closely but before they could reach the door a male voice stopped them in their tracks.

"Hey! Agreste. You dropped something." They turned to see Marinette's Fiance.

Adrien smiled, "What?"

Jason smirked, "As a matter of fact you both dropped something. Oh is that your backbone lying over there and ouch Rossi, look at your ego lying on the floor unguarded." There were collective gasps.

"How. Dare. You? I'M GOING TO RUIN YOU TWO!" Lila screamed, face red.

Jason smirked, "Don't worry we got that covered already."

Just at the perfect time, Adrien's phone ringed. "Put it on speaker sunshine." Marientte came to stand next to her fiance. "Your girlfriend wouldn't want to miss it."

Adrien put his phone on speaker. "Hello?"

"Hello Mr. Agreste jn.?"

"Yes that's me."

"You and your girlfriend are accused of helping your father with the illegal drug selling, black money and illegal properly. We are expecting you in the police station in an hour. As a caution, your passport has been disabled so you can't escape. The rest of the things will be told to you face to face." 

Lila screamed, "HOW?"

The officer heard her of course and deadpanned, "The Waynes were the one who did the investigation. I'm sure Mr. Todd Wayne and his fiance are standing right next to you."

"Hell yeah I am Lucus." 

Adrien cut the call. He looked at Marinette, face filled with disgust and pointed at her, "YOU! YOU DID THIS! YOU BIT**"

Marinette yawned, "I would have been a bit** if I had ruined your life, but I just sat on a chair enjoying how you do it yourself."

Adrien grabbed Lila's arm and marched out of the door.

Marinette sent a flying kiss her friends' way, "Okay bye! It was nice catching up with you but I gotta go now."

And like that the most kick-ass couple that we love went home to plan their wedding. That's it. And your lovely author closes the book and give you a sloppy salute. "See you next time folks. Thank you for joining me for our story Tuesday."

Forgot to post it but here we go. LILA BURNNNNN And take Adrien with you.

Permanent taglist: @nathleigh @jalaluvsu @togetherwekill @stackofrandomstuff @qualitypeacepainter @greatcatblaze @shewhorises-tjyj @myazael